#but we love each other strictly platonically; shes like my sister

[anakinsposts]

chad meeks martin x reader

prompt: reader lives with sam and tara in new york. she’s been in the friend group for years and is very close with chad, who is extremely protective of her. he’s always had a thing for her but never brought it up due to the fear he would ruin the friendship, until one night..an innocent game of truth or dare changes things

warnings: SMUT, p in v, making out, praise kink, riding, no condom, dirty talk, kinda slowburn but not rlly?

side note: I haven’t written smut in a while so sorry if this sucks! also I did not proofread so sorry for mistakes.

———————————————————-

It was a cold October night in New York. Your friends, Tara, Sam, Mindy, Annika, Ethan and Chad were all sat around the coffee table that was covered in the condensation from each one of your drinks. The sound of the TV was playing softly in the background as you all laughed, playing a game of truth or dare.

You had successfully made it through three rounds of the game without having to do something embarrassing. Granted, you chose truth everytime, which Mindy was not pleased with.

“Come on, you HAVE to choose dare this time.” Annika and the others agreed with her. “Says who?” you asked. “It’s the rules of the game.”

“Since when?” you laughed. “Since right now, i’m making it a new rule.”

“I don’t remember taking a vote on making you game maker.” you bantered.

“Everyone in favor of making me game maker take a sip of your drink.” Mindy said, watching with anticipation as everyone took sips of their drink. “Even you, Chad? I thought you had my back,” you whined at him. He smiled.

“Normally I would be against whatever my sister says buuut, you are the only one here who hasn’t done a dare yet,” he said. “Fine, I choose dare,” you gave in despite all efforts.

You knew by the look on her face that Mindy had something up her sleeve. “I dare you…” she started, giving it thought before looking between me and Chad. “I dare you and Chad to go into the bedroom and make out.”

Chad chimed in before you could, “Mindy that is so inappropriate.” You agreed. “Give me something else.”

“Nope..sorry those are the rules and since you all voted me game maker…what I say goes.” Mindy said, visibly pleased with her dare. “Hurry along now…i’m getting impatient.” She finished. The others piped in, pushing you to do it as if there wasn’t enough pressure already.

You sighed, looking at Chad with pleading eyes, hoping for him to step in and save you. Instead, he did the opposite. “Let’s go,” he said, standing up and holding out his hand. You hesitated but ultimately grabbed his hand as he helped you stand up.

Your hands stayed connected as he led you back to your bedroom. He allowed you to go in first, shutting the door behind him once he entered and leaned against it. His tall stature was almost the same height as the door frame. You sat on the edge of the bed, heart beating a mile a minute.

This was probably the first time in all the years you’ve been friends, that you and Chad had been alone in a room before. To say there were some unsaid feelings between you to would be an understatement. You’ve always had a thing for him, you loved the way he was so caring and protective over you. He treated you like a little sister, which was another reason you felt like he would never see you in a romantic way. Strictly platonic.

But the energy in your bedroom tonight was different than anything you experienced before. There was a sexual heaviness in the air and you couldn’t explain why. Chad didn’t take his eyes off you, he could tell you were deep in thought.

“Hey…you know we don’t have to do anything, right? I just brought you in here so Mindy would shut up,” he said, walking over from the door to sit beside you on the bed.

This brought some relief— but at the same time, it made your heart sink. There was a small part of you that wanted to kiss Chad, to feel his lips move against yours, to feel his hands linger on your body, to pull you on his lap while he explored your mouth, and eventually fuck you until you were cumming on his cock.

But that was a fantasy and you knew it. A fantasy that only occurred in your dreams and would most likely never become a reality. “Well, thank you for saving me.” you smiled, turning to make eye contact with him. “Anytime,” he smiled back. Fuck, you loved that stupid smile.

“I think ‘game maker Mindy’ is going to be pissed when she finds out we didn’t do anything,” you joked. “We’ll just have to convince her that we did.”

You gave him a questionable look. “For starters..we need to mess up your hair,” he said before taking his hands and roughing up your hair. You laughed in the process.

“Perfect, now you need a hickey or something.” You questioned him again. “If you think i’m burning myself with a curling iron..think again.”

“I can just give you one,” he chuckled. Your lower stomach fluttered. “I’m pretty sure that’s more intimate that actually making out,” you told him. “No, let me show you,” he said bluntly. You said nothing, but the look in your eyes was saying something totally different and Chad noticed.

He slowly took your hair and moved it behind your ear, exposing the soft skin of your neck. He leaned over slowly. Despite both of you sitting down, the height difference was still there. You let out barely audible sigh when he lips connected with your neck.

He left soft kisses over the skin, kissing up to your ear and back down to your collarbone. You involuntarily grabbed his arm and squeezed it, before he stopped at the most visible spot on your neck and began sucking.

Somewhere along the way, his hand had rested on your mid-thigh, rubbing and squeezing here and there. He didn’t do it for long before pulling away. He admired the reddish, purple mark he left, a smirk falling upon his lips. “Now, they will believe it.”

You were speechless. How could such a little act of affection, have you so fucking feral? You’re not exactly sure what came over you in that moment. “I like when you touch me,” you said innocently, looking down at his lips. “Yeah?” his smirk grew even bigger. “I like touching you.”

You both remained silent for a few seconds, trying to comprehend what the both of you just admitted. “Do you want me to touch you again?” he asked. You nodded. “Need to hear you say it baby.” It rolled off his tongue in the most sensual way. ‘Baby.’ replayed in your head over and over.

“Please…I want you to touch me,” you didn’t care how desperate you sounded and Chad was reeling over the use of ‘Please.’ Dirty thoughts flooding his mind.

He wasted no time leaning in to actually kiss you this time. It started out slow, because he wanted to give you time to back out if you needed. But you had no plans of doing so. It wasn’t until you let out a soft moan against his lips that he deepened the kiss.

His tongue slid in your mouth, fighting for dominance and easily winning. He couldn’t get enough of you. He pulled you onto his lap, hands resting on your sides as you made out for several minutes. A pool of wetness gathered in your panties, and you grinned yourself against him for some sort of friction.

“Chad..” you whined, desperately wanted more. “Can I take these off?” he referred to your pants. You nodded before he unbuckled your pants, lifting you up slightly so he could remove them. You also removed your shirt in the process.

It was embarrassing how soaked you were. He noticed the damp part of your pink panties. He smirked. “Stop smirking.”

“I just love how wet you are for me baby,” he said, fingers trailing down your stomach before reaching the top part of your panties. He looked at you for permission and you gave him a reassuring nod. He slipped his fingers below the fabric, finding your clit with ease and rubbing slow circles on it.

You moaned, feeling some release in your core from his touch. “Please don’t stop,” you whined.

“Mm, such a good girl..always using her manners,” he praised in your ear. He continued to rub you, adding a little more pressure. “I bet I could make you cum just doing this,” Chad said. “I know you’ve always had a little crush on me..I see the way you tense up when i’m near you, how you bite your lip while you look at my muscles, how red in the face you get when you see me talking to other girls.”

You couldn’t do anything but moan in response. You were seeing stars as he picked up the pace of his fingers, rubbing your clit faster and more aggressively. “Admit it to me y/n. Tell me how you feel about me.”

“I-I’ve wanted you for s-so long,” you sigh pleasurably. “Yeah? Tell me more.” God he was being so hot.

“Sometimes I touch myself at night to the thought of you.” You knew that would boost his ego like hell, but you didn’t care at this point. “Mm, I see. You’ve thought about cumming on my cock? Screaming my name while I fuck you numb?”

“Yes..n-need more Chad,” you moaned. He removed his hand, before reaching down to remove his own pants. His cock was painfully hard at hearing your confessions. He was honestly dumbfounded by the fact that this was happening. Though he would never admit, there was not a day that went by where he didn’t think about fucking you.

You removed your panties, Chad’s eyes immediately glued to your pussy. “Fuck” he breathed out. You helped him remove his boxers, both of you now completely naked. You crashed your lips on his again, making out as you reached down to stroke his cock in your small hand, which barely wrapped around the width. The movements earning a deep groan from his lips.

“You’re so big,” you moaned into his mouth, hand moving up and down his cock faster. “Wanna feel it inside you?” he asked in between kisses. You nodded, he gave you a look of disapproval. “I wanna feel you inside me,” you told him, he was much more satisfied with that answer.

He pulled you back onto his lap, hand gripping your waist as you hovered over his cock. Chad positioned himself at your entrance and looked up at you for one last reassurance, just in case you wanted to stop.

You answered his question as you slowly slid down on his cock, just enough for the tip to go in. You could tell he was trying to keep composure. So were you.

He held your hips, guiding you down farther as you both moaned in sync at the feeling. “Oh..f-fuck,” you whine. “You’re so fucking tight baby,” he groaned. He was big, way bigger than anyone you’ve ever been with. The pain mixed with pleasure made you feel like you were going to explode.

Once every inch of him was inside you, he began moving you back and forth on his cock. Profanities spilled from both of your mouth, absolutely drunk with pleasure. You rested your hands on his shoulders for support as you rode him. “Look at me when you ride me,” he demanded.

You moaned, meeting his eyes, sending you closer to the edge. “You’re doing so good baby, taking me so good..” he moaned, throwing his head back. You both continued like this for several minutes, before he took your arms and held them behind your back, leaning back and beginning to pound into you relentlessly.

“Fuck…fuck..fuck…don’t stop…please don’t stop,” you moaned louder as he thrusted like there was no tomorrow. “You’re making me feel so good y/n,” he said, “Fuck, I could do this all fucking night…make you stay on my cock forever.” His dirty words only pushed you closer and closer. He thrusted harder even though you weren’t sure how it was possible.

You core ached with the need for release. You could feel him deep in your stomach, every thrust deeper bringing you to the brink of collapse. “C-chad…g-gonna cum..”

“Me too baby, me too..” he assured you. Letting go of your arms, he reached between your bodies and began rubbing your clit. The overstimulation too much for you to handle. “Wanna feel you cum on my cock..” he said, rubbing your clit faster and fucking you harder as you came undone.

“Mm that’s right..Good girl…cum for me baby…fuck I love the way you’re squeezing me..” he talked you through the orgasm before reaching his own..

He wanted to pull out but there was a part of him, the sick, selfish and dirty part of him, that wanted to cum inside your pussy.

You knew he was on the edge, you could feel the way his cock throbbed inside you. He let out small whimpers as he felt the pleasure overtake him. Without giving it much thought, you said “Want you to cum inside me.”

He didn’t try to ask if you were sure, with the fear that you would take back what you said. Instead, his warm cum spilled inside you, coating every inch of your walls while moaning your name.

He thrusted a few more times before coming to a stop, but he didn’t pull out. You collapsed in his arms, listening to the faint sound of his rapid heartbeat that got slower as you both came down from the high.

“I can’t believe you just let me do that,” he laughs. “Honestly, me either..but it felt right,” you admit. He pulled out of you, “Spread your legs.” he told you as he sat up. You didn’t question it, you just did what he said. He watched as the white cum slowly dripped out of your hole. “Looking at my cum drip out your little pussy…yeah it was definitely the right decision.”

You blushed with embarrassment. “I never knew you were so naughty,” you laughed. “Baby, this isn’t even close to how naughty I can be,” he said with all seriousness.

A few minutes passed and you both got dressed, Chad helped you get cleaned up before leaving the room. To be honest, you had completely forgot the others still existed. Chad wrapped his arm around you as you walked back to your friends.

“Match-maker Mindy has done it again!” Mindy said, proud of herself, knowing she orchestrated this whole thing. “But I absolutely NEVER want to hear the foul and absolutely disgusting things I just heard in that bedroom.”

“Well thanks to you…you get to hear it every single night,” Chad said before both of you joined back at the coffee table for another round of truth or dare.

AU: CHAD IS DEF THE TYPE TO TALK U THROUGH IT AND I STAND BY THAT

[tcvsfiredemon]

Platonic Narumayo and Romantic Tension

I was originally gonna post this as a twitter thread, but it started getting really long and that toxic sludgepit doesn’t deserve that kind of effort. Get yourself a snack or something, it’s gonna get rambly.

I think people who go out of their way to shut down the possibility that there could be any romantic attraction between Nick and Maya are missing out on a really cool aspect of their platonic relationship.

There’s a lot to be said about the many facets of the Narumayo friendship, from their bonding through shared trauma, to their building a found family with Pearl, to their effortless ability to trade off being the straight man of their comedic duo. But I think a lot of people miss how much of their friendship is informed by the fact that they both kinda want to kiss each other.

First off, Maya is constantly teasing Phoenix, and often in a weirdly flirty way. Just a few examples off the top of my head. She says Max is dreamy with stars on his face and immediately suggests Nick put stars on his face. She acts like a spurned lover when Phoenix is talking to Adrian, specifically in an attempt to get him flustered. She explicitly compares Phoenix rescuing her from being kidnapped to the DeLites’ love story. 

There’s quite a few moments like this throughout the games, and coupled with a lot of Maya’s actions and reactions, I get the sense that we’re supposed to believe that she has a thing for Nick. Maybe that’s just the shipping goggles talking, but it really does feel like the intended subtext. I mean, look at that what she instinctively drew when she was in 

(You’re probably wondering when the platonic part comes in. We’ll get there.)

But even if Maya does have a crush on Phoenix, does he return it? Obviously she’s very important to him, but is that really as a romantic interest? We often see him get flustered or stunned into silence whenever people assume he and Maya are dating(which happens a lot), but I feel like that can easily just be read as him being uncomfortable with people assuming he’s in a relationship with his assistant.

In general, Phoenix’s feelings for Maya are fairly ambiguous and probably not something that he’s thought through too much himself. That is, of course, until the waitress scene. That scene, in my opinion, is the single hardest thing to justify if you’re trying to deny any romantic tension within Narumayo. I’ve seen people say that it’s just Phoenix giving a compliment to his best friend/sister figure, but is that really the tone that’s being conveyed there? 

That initial comment on her voice. The pregnant pause when he sees her. The weird pick-up line that probably just came out of his mouth without any thought. That’s not the actions of a guy innocently complimenting his friend, that’s the reaction of a guy who just realized that he finds his friend hot. I’d argue that the case can’t even proceed the way it does unless Phoenix thinks Maya is attractive, because that’s what gives him the idea to try to get her to seduce information out of Kudo.

So between Maya and Phoenix we have two best friends with a lot of chemistry who are probably into each other, and whose friends definitely think are already togeyhet, but we never actually see them take that step into romance. And you know what? It fucking works!

(See, told you we’d get into the platonic stuff eventually.)

One of my favorite movies of all time is When Harry Met Sally, and while the titular couple does get together in the end, most of the film is about the two of them navigating being best friends while obviously having romantic feelings for each other. It’s a beautiful story of these two people building a wonderful platonic relationship and then very nearly ruining it when they try to turn it romantic. 

That’s the dynamic I see between Phoenix and Maya. They love each other and are probably in love with each other, but they insist on keeping things strictly platonic because to change that could mean to destroy what they’ve spent years building up. It’s an underlying tension that underscores a lot of their actions.

It’s the dynamic that the two of them still have almost a decade later in SoJ, where they find immense comfort just being in each other’s presence, investigating cases like old times. And no matter how much Phoenix gawks at Maya like a sun fish, no matter how many times Maya teases Nick while they’re investigating a wedding-based case, no matter how much they may or may not want to kiss, they’re so happy just to be friends.

(Not that I’d be mad if they did end up kissing…)

Obviously there’s nothing wrong at all with seeing Narumayo as siblings or as purely platonic friends who would never in their wildest dreams be romantically interested in each other, but I do feel like something is lost in that interpretation. 

Like, I’m not the biggest fan of romantic Narumitsu, but I don’t think you can truly appreciate their friendship while ignoring that those guys have a weird pseudo-romantic tension going on. Without it they’re just two dudes who used to be friends and don’t have a whole lot of chemistry but would still for some reason die for each other. Once you acknowledge that “oh, they’re kinda in love, aren’t they” it all makes perfect sense.

I don’t think platonic Narumayo exactly falls apart if you ignore their romantic tension. They still have all that other stuff I talked about, but their relationship loses a lot of richness if it’s reduced to just “besties” or “siblings”. Even the games themselves took a little time to explore the potential romantic tension between Phoenix and Maya, and I think that’s been pretty instrumental in making them one of the coolest male/female friendships this side of When Harry Met Sally.

[shelbgrey]

Being Seeley Booth's Best friend Headcanons:

Paring: Seeley Booth x Platonic!Reader, reader x Lance Sweets

Summary: headcanons on what it's like to have Seeley Booth as your Person(greys fans know what I mean)

1.8) “not all soul mates are lovers”

MasterList

To the unknown or to strangers that see you on the street, might think your a couple. Sure your touchy with each other but your both strictly best friends and it's all Platonic.

Your Hodgins little cousin if your wondering, but your the first one at the jeffersonian Booth really clicked with.

You guys kinda became an unlike duo and people knew he was basically your body guard.

Like I said before you guys are close, so that means your arms might be linked sometime, you'll eat or drink after each other... You guys are just really comfortable with each other.

At time you do think you guys might be too close, like your afraid it might screw up your actual relationships.

“you think our friendship bothers Bones and Lance?” you asked.

“it doesn't bother Bones... She told me she'd figured if we we're attracted to each other we'd already be together”

You guys have been friends longer than you guys been in your romantic relationships, so Lance nor Temperance has an actual problem.

Lance might get jealous at times, like he might think Seeley is more attractive or he'll think you guys would make a better couple. You'll make sure to get those thoughts out of his head and you make sure Lance knows he's the only guy for you.

Lance knows your friendship is strictly Platonic, hell Seeley even helped you guys admit your feelings for one another.

The thought of you guys being more than friends grosses you guys out. You guys maybe comfortable with each other and might have shared a bed, but the thought of having sex disterbs the both of you.

“ew... She's literally like a sister to me!”

If you have a problem and you can't tell Lance you go to Seeley, you know he'll never judge you.

The feeling is mutual, he'll go to you if he has to vent about the army, work, or if he needs advice on how to deal with Temperance.

You are now the soul keeper of his dog tags, you wear them for good luck.

You guys say many things to show your affection, some loving and some inappropriate(you know its all love tho). You say things like, “love ya”, “suck it”, “hey, loser”, “shut it bitch”

Of course you usually call him 'bitch'. He knows it's a joke but he can't bring himself to call you that back.

His brother having the hots for you, but he actually really creeps you out. Before you started dating Lance his brother would hit on you when he visited DC, you told Seely about it and he got his brother to back off.

Nicknames are all over the the place, but your favorite one for him is 'bub'. He calls your 'shorty' or 'kid'.

Since your a 'squint' you say words he doesn't understand and sometimes he tries to talk like you a fails. “I need a.. What do you call it, I swabie thing”

“a what?” you asked as he digged through your drawers in the Lab.

He sighs. “come on, I have to figure out what you say everyday and you can't figure out 'swabie thing'?”

Some people do question your relationship and even try to get you guys to turn on each other or even try to tamper with your romantic relationship(*cough* Daisy *cough*)

“he's my person,”

He's very protective of you... Sometimes it gets annoying but you know he means we'll.

“if you ever touch her again, I WILL kill you!”

You guys do have fights, it's rare but if it happens it gets really heated. The fights are mostly about your guys stupidity at work.

“you could have died! You realize that?” he shouted.

“your not the boss of me! Your not my father!”

“well, if I was you wouldn't be this stupid!” he'll regret it immediately. If there was one thing he never want you to think is that your stupid.

He knows your knowledge is an insecurity. You feel like your not as smart as the others, so Seeley is always there to hype you up and remind you of the big brain you have.

Most of the time you guys will immediately make up. He'll pull you into a massive hug and tell you he's sorry over and over.

Speaking of hugs, he gives the best bear hugs. His hug make you feel extremely safe.

Being each other's best man/woman at your guys weddings.

You are the designated babysitter for both Parker and Christine. They both call you 'Aunty y/n'

Him and Temperance babyset your Kids when ever they can.

You guys love blasting music and just jam out in the car or at your apartments.

He's your shoulder to cry on, I think he's the only one aside from Lance that really seen you absolutely lose it.

His grandfather basically adopting you and you call him pops like Seeley dose. Sometime Hank will leave the nursing home just to check in on you and Lance.

You go to alot of crime scenes together, you have the same job as your cousin Hodgins, but if Temperance can't go with him to investigate you'll Tag along.

There's nothing he wouldn't do for you. You, Bones, and christine are his world.

He's got your back and he'll die if it ment protecting you.

Angela once said this about you two: “not all soulmates are lovers”

She's not wrong, your the sister he never had or asked for.

You'll never have a friend like him and you don't plan on getting ride of him anytime soon.

[revolu]

Were John Laurens and Alexander Hamilton lovers?

I think I need to state the obvious here; no one knows 100% if they were lovers or just friends. We have reasonable evidence to believe that they were lovers, or at least had something romantic between them... However, we can also see that they refer to each other as "friends".

I posted a video about this on my tiktok, but I'll post this here as well; in text format instead of a slideshow.

Here is basically what I'll talk about:

History of male friendships

In ancient times, men were extremely close. They valued male friendships a lot, even more than their relationship between their wife. This was because men believed women to be inferior to men. This belief is still present today in many parts of the world, and it was, of course, a common thing to believe in the 18th century – the timeline in which Laurens and Hamilton were alive.

Men would embrace each other, hold hands, sleep in the same bed if necessary, and even go as far as kiss. Kissing your male friend, as a male, on the cheek was nothing unusual. It is not only a greeting in some cultures, it is also a sign of affection and to indicate friendship, family relationship, or to confer congratulations, to comfort someone, or to show respect... It was not generally seen as anything romantic.

Although homosexuality was highly looked down upon, people were not really as scared to be labeled as "gay" as people are today. And feelings of love were not as strictly labeled as either "platonic" or "romantic" as they are today either.

In many instances, male friendships, in the 1700s-1800s, had a similar intensity as a romantic relationship between a female and a male. Many do not know this, and therefore assume close male friends were lovers... Which is probably the case for Hamilton and Laurens.

Men would use very affectionate and endearing words to each other, which is seen in the Hamilton-Laurens letters. However, there is always a line to cross. And many think that Hamilton and Laurens definitely crossed that line.

Hamilton & Laurens

Before we dig deeper into Laurens' relationship with Hamilton, we need to discuss his supposed homosexuality.

John Laurens didn't seem to necessarily express any attraction towards women. We know this, not only because of his sexist behaviors and his lack of effort to humble his wife, but we can also read about this in his father's letters.

"Master Jack is too closely wedded to his studies to think about any of the Miss Nanny's"

Henry Laurens writes.

This basically says that John was too focused on his studies to show any interest in women.

However, he was a teenager at that time, and not every teenager starts developing feelings for people at the same age.

Henry did not seem so happy with John's lack of interest in women, but we also do know that Henry was most certainly emotionally manipulative towards John, which we also can read in letters. But I will not discuss that now, that is for another post.

Anyways, John expressed a fair lot of sexist behaviors and opinions, even towards his own sisters. Most men had some sort of sexist belief, because as said before, men believed women to be inferior. But it's almost as if Laurens showed more toxic masculinity and seemed to be quite strict on the subject. This, most likely, plays a part in Laurens' supposed homosexuality.

Laurens hid the fact that he had a wife (and a child) from Hamilton for nearly two years. This awakes questions. Why did he do that? To get a better chance with Hamilton, or to try and forget his family? Or was it simply because he didn't want to share such a fact about himself to someone new, and never found the opportunity to tell him?

Nevertheless, we know for a fact that Laurens only married his wife, Martha Manning, after she got pregnant. He married her to keep illegitimacy of their child, but also out of pity.

John writes to his uncle;

"...Pity has obliged me to marry.."

When Laurens left for war, he left his pregnant wife in a whole other country... In December 1780, when congress chose John to be a special minister to France and had him travel there, Martha decided to travel with her daughter to reconnect with him upon hearing his arrival in France.

But apparently, John completed his mission and returned to the United States before Martha was able to see him.

Martha Manning died in France, 1781, during this trip. Only a year before John himself died. Their child, Frances, was sent to live with her aunt.

I don't know if he had the opportunity to bring his wife with him when he went home to America to fight, but he certainly did not make any (known) effort to visit his wife or daughter while in France.

However, a thing worth to know, is that Laurens only ever called his wife "Dear Girl", and Hamilton "Dear Boy"... As far as we know. We know that Hamilton was special to Laurens, but was his wife really special? Or was it just an affectionate name out of pity, because he felt bad? Did he grant her that name to make her feel loved? Whatever the reason is, this supports Laurens and Hamilton being lovers, or at least having some kind of chemistry, seeing as Laurens didn't call his other close friends such names.

Many believe that Laurens was gay, mostly because of his extreme lack of affection towards women, which his sexist beliefs could've played a major role in, but also because of his letter correspondence between Alexander Hamilton, and a guy named Francis Kinloch. We will never know his true sexuality though.

Time to talk about Hamilton, his wife, and his supposed bisexuality.

Alexander Hamilton was born out of wedlock in Charlestown, in the Colony of Nevis, in the British West Indies in 1755 or 1757. His father left when he was about 10 (depends on what birth year you go off), and his mother died when he was around 12-13, leaving both him and his brother orphaned.

Contrary to popular belief, Alexander did have a number of parental figures growing up. But unlike Laurens, who was born and raised to be that typical man of their time, and whose father chose his career path, Alexander was more "free".

This is a possible factor to Alexander's openness, the way he started his first (survived) letter to Laurens with the famous;

"Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships..."

Laurens was pretty disciplined, and was probably taught a number of different things on how to be the ideal man.

Hamilton, however, didn't have the same opportunity, and his environment growing up was very different from Laurens'.

We can see in letters when comparing them that Hamilton seems much more affectionate. Although Laurens uses affectionate language as well, he seems more "professional" and "careful" than Hamilton.

Another thing to note is that Hamilton was often described as feminine.

"...something almost feminine about his gentleness and concern for the comfort and happiness of other people..."

These are reasons as to why people believe Hamilton was bisexual, especially because he expressed love (true love, mind you) towards Eliza as well! Reading the letters between him and Eliza, it is evident that he really did love her.

Note that Hamilton was a flirtatious man, and that his letters to Laurens seem almost as flirtatous as his letters to Eliza. Even if his flirtatious language calmed when he met Eliza, the years before that he definitely expressed something more "romantic" and flirtatious in his letters to Laurens.

And supposedly, someone(?) had asked Hamilton if he was bisexual (in other terms, of course). I don't know whether or not this is true, but it is certainly another reason as to why people think he was bisexual.

Did Alexander really invite Laurens to have a threesome with him and Eliza on their wedding night?

The simple answer for this is "probably not."

But this obviously needs more digging.

Hamilton writes to Laurens;

"I would invite you after the fall to Albany to be witness of the final consummation"

The word "consummation" is most commonly used to refer to two people having sexual intercourse to seal their relationship/marriage. It was quite common, especially around Christians, to do this.

Hamilton is most certainly referring to this, and he is inviting Laurens to "witness" it. A.k.a., to watch. (which wasn't too unusual!)

Hamilton, in the same letter, mentions that Eliza loves Laurens in the American manner and not the French manner, meaning that she loves him as a friend and nothing more. So the possibility of Hamilton inviting Laurens to have a threesome with them is pretty low... Especially because Hamilton explicitly wrote "witness", and not "join". So, he most likely did NOT invite Laurens to have a threesome with him and his wife.

So, were Hamilton and Laurens lovers? (Conclusion)

Considering the little knowledge we have, we cannot say for sure.

Historians say that the possibility of them being lovers, at least before Hamilton met Eliza, is big!

Personally, I think it is very possible that they were lovers, or at the very least had some sort of romantic relationship. A lot of things point to a romantic bond, however a lot of things also point to them being only close friends.

But from my perspective, the romantic signs outnumber the platonic ones in their first years of friendship. It is clear, however, that Alexander did really love Eliza, and you can see an obvious change in Alexander's language towards John after Eliza came into his life.

To summarize their relationship with a bit of comedy, I'd say it's more like a high school crush type of situation; Alexander and John had a crush on one another, which possibly turned into something more serious, before Alexander fell in love with the new girl at school, and they ended up together, later marrying. High school sweethearts.

But in all seriousness, my friend actually worded it amazingly good;

"they were just real close friends trying to serve one anothers ‘needs’ till they found the one"

Which is a very good and possible theory!

But, is it okay to ship Lams?

I'd say so, yes.

Shipping historical figures is weird asf if the people didn't have any romantic chemistry and so... Which Laurens and Hamilton seemed to have.

Therefore, I think it is okay to ship Lams. But of course is it also okay to not ship Lams, and to dislike it! We will never know for sure if they were lovers or not, and we cannot say that they 100% weren't lovers or 100% were. Sadly, a lot of letters have been destroyed/not found, and we can only know so much.

Feel free to ask questions or add anything, whether it's supporting them being just friends or the possibility of them being lovers.

I know I haven't covered everything in this post, like Hamilton joking about his own pp in the first (survived) letter to Laurens, so if you're interested in reading that; go on my tiktok (@historicalhamsandwich) and check out my slideshow about this there. (I also cover more letters)

With that said, have a good day/night!! :)

[midwestmade29]

Prequel Request 💻

To Anonymous: Your idea was so cute! I loved coming up with the little moments that were shared between Christian, Adam, and Adam’s little sister. The summer part was fun to write too 😉 I hope I did your request justice🤞🏻Thanks so much for sending it in 🖤

Word count: 2,405 Divider by: @firefly-graphics

Disclaimers: Broken bone, losing virginity, sexual intercourse. Read at your own discretion.

Original Anonymous Request: “Sis! I need a prequel to the last fic! Anyway we can get something with the little moments with Adam, the Reader, and Christian as they all grew up as well as moments with The Reader and Christian that summer that they were all over each other when she was home from college?”

You'll find my original story that inspired this request here 🙂

School had just let out for the summer and your mother took you, your older brother Adam, and his best friend Christian to get ice cream and celebrate. You practically salivated all over the counter while you watched each worker scoop out the delicious dairy onto cones and into bowls. “What the heck is that monstrosity? That looks disgusting!” Christian said to you with a scrunched-up face. His words didn’t faze you though, and you happily dug into your sweet treat covered in gummy bears, sprinkles, cookie pieces and chocolate syrup. With your mouth full, you asked Christian if he wanted a bite and his response was a fake gag.

That same summer was when the 3 of you were outside riding your bikes, showing off different tricks each of you could do. You tried to one up your big brother and his best friend by attempting a trick you’d never done before, but it backfired immediately when you overturned your bike forcing it to land on your wrist and break it in 2 places! Adam carried you all the way home to your mom and Christian took care of your bike. Your mom rushed you to the emergency room to get x-rays, sighing in relief when the doctor said surgery wasn’t needed. Your wrist hurt, that’s for sure, but you were more focused on what color cast you were going to get to pay much attention to it! When you got home late that night, Adam was already fast asleep, and you weren’t too far behind. You were about to plop down on your bed when you noticed a Lex Luger and a Sting wrestling figure resting up against your pillow with 2 notes taped to their chests:

Dear sis, Sorry about your wrist! I hope it heals super-fast! Hopefully good old Lex can help cheer you up some. Love ya, Adam P.S.-You’re going to look so tough with your new cast!

To Y/N, You better be more careful next time! I’m letting you borrow Sting, but I want him back the minute your wrist is healed. -Christian P.S.- I’m glad you’re okay. Can’t wait to sign your cast.

“Come on guys, don’t fight! You two are best friends! Now hug and make up, right now.” You demanded. You stood in the middle of Adam and Christian while they had their backs turned towards each other. They had been arguing over petty stuff for the last 45 minutes, and you were getting tired of hearing them go back and forth. Even though you were the youngest out of the 3 of you, you were wise beyond your years! You surprised them both with your next words, “Seriously, will the stuff you two are fighting about even matter tomorrow? Stop being dummies! You’re best friends, not enemies so act like it!” Christian stayed disgruntled with his arms crossed, refusing to be the first to say sorry, but Adam’s stance softened when he turned around and looked at you. “Wow, you opened your mouth and mom came out there for a second Y/N! But you’re right. This fight was stupid and I’m sorry Christian. Friends?” he asked while extending his hand to his best friend. Christian didn’t budge or shake Adam’s hand until you kicked him in the shin, forcing him out of the stupor he was in. Through gritted teeth he shook Adam’s hand and agreed, “Friends.”

Christian’s feelings towards you were strictly platonic when you were kids, or so you thought. The older the two of you got, the more his feelings for you started to change. It was odd when he started being nice to you, and definitely strange when you noticed he was talking to you more than he was Adam. You just chalked it up to him sucking up to you so you would help him with his homework! You still remember the disappointed look on his face when you told him that you would be gone for nearly 2 months because you were going to be a counselor at a summer camp. “Really? 6 weeks? That won’t leave you much summer break when you get back. Are you sure you have to go?” Christian murmured. “Of course, I have to go, silly! It’s a great opportunity for me. It’s not like I won’t be having fun while I’m there too! There’s plenty of activities to do and I get to mentor kids,” you said full of excitement. You thought Christian’s next question was bizarre, even for his weird ass. “Is it a girl’s only camp?” You didn’t even bother responding to such a ridiculous question! Instead, you rolled your eyes and made your way towards your front door, Christian following behind you like a lost puppy.

2 more years passed, you were certainly all grown up now! You were looking forward heading off to college in the fall, and the summer ahead was just prolonging your independence and your desire to explore new surroundings. One night, your mother had baked cookies and you sat at the kitchen counter devouring them. Laughter filled the air, and the conversation flowed! Out of nowhere, your mom brought up Christian, “You know that boy has it bad for you, Y/N! It’s so obvious!” The horrified look on your face made her laugh! “Christian?! As in Adam’s best friend, Christian? The one who has teased me my whole life and been a thorn in my side? There’s no way mom!” your words came out a little faster than you meant them to, and the more you spoke on the matter, you weren’t sure if you were trying to convince your mother- or yourself that Christian didn’t have feelings for you. Your mother’s words were soft as she explained herself farther, “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Y/N. The boy is smitten! He asks me about you all the time, you know? The two of you are old enough now to explore any…feelings that might be there. Better to discuss things now before it’s too late and you’re off to college.” That same night while you were lying in your bed, sleep evaded you while you continuously went over the conversation you had earlier with your mother. Her words didn’t seem so silly the more you thought about them, and they helped you realize something that you had suppressed deep inside of you for several years, you had feelings for Christian.

“Why wasn’t I supposed to tell Adam we were meeting here, Y/N? What’s going on?” Christian asked you as he slid into the corner booth. Seeing Christian in this new light made you feel shy, even a little awkward. The conversation you had planned in your head wasn’t going to be as easy as you thought it would be! “Because if he knew the reason why I asked you to come, you’d probably end up with a broken nose and he’d lock me in my room until summer is over!” you teased. Christian looked over his shoulder, making sure the coast was clear before speaking frantically, “Okay, spill it Y/N! You’ve got me worried that my best friend might try and kill me for talking to his sister. What the heck is going on?!” That night you confessed your feelings for Christian, laying everything on the table at your local diner. You practically handed the boy your heart on a silver platter! When he didn’t respond right away, you felt yourself sink a little in the booth and your cheeks felt like they were bright red. When he finally spoke, all your worry and doubt washed away. “Was I that obvious?” he asked sheepishly. “I thought I hid my feelings pretty well. Man, your mom doesn’t miss anything does she? Anyway, I’m crazy about you Y/N! I have been for a long time. What do you say? Do you want to see where the summer takes us and really give a relationship a try?” You were beaming from his words, eagerly responding, “Yes, of course! I want nothing more, Christian.”

Your mom helped you and Christian stay off Adam’s mind and out of his sight as your relationship continued to blossom. She made you promise her that you would tell your brother soon about you and Christian dating, but you hadn’t found the right time to break the news to him yet. Even though it felt wrong sneaking around behind your brother’s back, you were enjoying spending all your time with his best friend and getting him all to yourself! You and Christian shared your first kiss in the warm summer rain when it started to down pour while the two of you were at a concert in a local park. The kiss was something you had dreamed about ever since you could remember, and it turned out to be incredibly sweet and romantic. Most of the summer days were spent poolside to escape the heat. Christian definitely approved of your skimpy bikini while your older brother did not. Your favorite activity was one the two of you did almost every night as long as Adam was asleep or had other plans separate from yours. Christian always brought the blanket and made quick work of spreading it out on the ground so both of you could lay on it and look at the stars. You two shared several meaningful conversations, often talking about your childhood but also looking ahead and making plans for the future.

One night, things were heating up between you and Christian as you made out underneath the blanket of stars. This spot near the pond just behind your house had become your favorite place, almost a sanctuary of peace and serenity for you and Christian. But the more his hands roamed freely on your body, leaving you a panting mess whenever he would break a kiss to come up for air, it turned into a place full of passion and desire. Christian knew you were a virgin and he never made you feel embarrassed of it or ashamed, and never forcing you to do anything you weren’t comfortable with. You had talked about taking that next step in your relationship in recent conversations, but you were hesitant. You knew it wouldn’t be Christian’s first time, him giving up that part of him a long time ago, but you still wanted it to be special for him too. “What if I’m no good at it?” you asked while your hands covered your face. Christian slowly removed them so he could look into your eyes, his words full of sincerity as he reassured you, “Giving yourself to me in that way is a gift and it’s something I don’t take lightly. No matter when- or if it happens- I know it will be beautiful. I will do my best to make sure it’s special for the both of us.”

A week later, you made your final decision about having sex with Christian or not. When you told him you were ready, he nearly took you right then and there on your front porch! The very next night, Christian took you by the hand and led you to your favorite spot. You couldn’t believe your eyes when he parted the final tree branches, revealing a strand of lights that were strung from the tree over to the old swing. A lantern illuminated the familiar blanket on the ground that was now adorned with a few small pillows and a second blanket. The only noise that could be heard were the rustling leaves on the trees in the soft summer breeze and the sound of nature carrying on quietly all around you. Once you were comfortable on the blanket, Christian checked in with you one final time before proceeding any further, “Are you sure you want to do this, Y/N? It’s completely fine if you’ve changed your mind. I’d be more than happy to lay here with you and look at the stars.” You gave him the green light to continue, and he took his time removing your clothes. He kissed every inch of newly exposed skin as he went along, making sure to savor every part of you. You watched as he opened the condom with his teeth before sliding it down his hard length and positioning himself in between your legs. He warned you gently that it was going to hurt at first, but after a while the discomfort would go away.

You held your breath as he inched himself inside of you, gasping when his full length was all the way in. “A-are you okay, Y/N? If it’s too much, p-please tell me and I’ll stop,” Christian said breathlessly as his slowed his movements. “No, please don’t stop. K-keep going!” you reassured him. With each thrust of his hips, the discomfort started to dissipate and was replaced with pleasure as Christian’s tip hit all the right spots. Your fingers dug into his back as waves of pure bliss crashed over your body, your tight walls squeezing around Christian and milking him of everything he had to give you. His name fell from your lips when you came, your juices coating the condom allowing Christian to slide in and out with ease. With a few final grunts, Christian found his release too, his body still pinning you against the blanket as he tried to steady his breathing. He planted tender kisses on your lips between each breath and you couldn’t help but smile. “How are you doing sweetheart? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” his words were a mere whisper as he looked into your eyes, studying your face for any kind of sign that you were okay. You couldn’t help but to burst out into a fit of giggles when you asked Christian, “That. Was. Incredible! When can we do it again?”

That wasn’t the last time the two of you had sex that summer. Your appetite for Christian was insatiable, and he was more than willing to try and cure your hunger. If you could’ve stayed in the bubble you and Christian had created around yourselves, you certainly would have. Unfortunately, September was rapidly approaching, bringing you closer to the difficult decision that you knew each of you had to make. Little did you know at the time just how much the end of summer decision was going to alter the course of your relationship afterwards.

[spamhappyface]

Aromatic Summer| H.P.

Pairings: Harry James Potter x Fem!Reader Word Count:2.1k

WARNINGS: SMUT, praise kink, oral (m receiving, slightly aggressive) deep throat, kinda sir kink! Sub!Harry (kinda) Dom!reader Characters are of age! Plotless…

It wasn't a surprise that Y/n's mother, Teresa, sometimes didn't treat her like a typical teenager. Teresa had decided to send Y/n to Privet Drive for the summer to take care of Harry after the recent incident. Y/n and Harry were more than just friends; they had lost their virginity to each other a couple of months ago. However, they had agreed to keep their relationship strictly platonic since then.

A lot had changed since Harry became the Hogwarts champion for the Triwizard Tournament. The death of Viktor Krum, Y/n's childhood best friend, had left her in shock. She had witnessed his lifeless body during their duel, and it had deeply affected her. Despite being only fifteen years old, Y/n's mother somehow expected her to play the role of Harry's therapist, even though it wasn't her responsibility.

Y/n believed her mother was joking when she approached Mr Dursley with a card from Dumbledore at King's Cross Station. The card stated that she would be spending two weeks with the Dursleys since Teresa was Harry's godmother. The Dursleys, filled with apprehension after reading the card, reluctantly agreed to accommodate Y/n.

Meanwhile, the last thing Y/n wanted was to spend her summer with abusive Muggles like the Dursleys, who seemed to be just as bad as her own mother, if not worse. The initial days with Harry were far from what she had anticipated. Y/n longed for solitude and craved being in the comfort of her own home, or at least with her parents and her little sister. Being at Privet Drive felt like a nightmare she couldn't wake up from.

Despite her disdain for the Dursleys, Y/n knew how to mask her true feelings and behave appropriately in front of ignorant Muggles. She had grown up in the North American Magical community and had attended Ilvermorny, giving her a unique perspective and a deeper understanding of Muggle’s life, including political views. She had engaged in many insightful debates with the Dursleys, or so she thought, until a particular conversation she had with Harry.

"To be fair, Y/n, you look alright, but..." Harry started, trying to convince her to wear something else.

"I know,” she said happily.

"Why don't you try my jacket?" he suggested casually, fetching it from his wardrobe.

"Are you joking?!" she exclaimed, giggling. "We're... how hot is it?"

"Dunno!" Harry raised his voice for a moment before calming down. "Look, it's just that I reckon you should wear something different. Dudley's mates are proper wankers. They're bound to say something, and you know we don't want to get into any bloody trouble—"

"Oh, come on, Harry. It's just a sundress. My mom bought it for me, she chose it, and I'm going to wear it. I look hot and—" Y/n said firmly to Harry, then caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and was surprised. "Oh, Merlin's beard! Why don't I have a boyfriend or something? I would totally date myself, damn..."

Harry seemed a bit bewildered by her comment but carried on expressing his concerns.

"Yeah, and you look lovely. Look, Y/n, you're stunning. You've got a beautiful smile, gorgeous eyes, stunning hair, and a brilliant personality. But I'm dead serious, please. I'm saying this 'cause I care about you, and those blokes are daft as a brush. They even smoke weed, and sometimes they— I don't wanna get in any trouble for defending you."

"Oh, Harry," Y/n said, her cheeks slightly reddening. "Thanks for the compliments, but I know how to handle myself. You don't have to worry about it. Come on, let's go swing!"

“But you’re wearing a dress–”

Unexpectedly, Y/n lifted her dress up to her belly, revealing a pair of black spandex shorts.

“It’s called shorts, you know?” she said a bit annoyed by his behaviour, putting it down again.

Y/n stormed out of Harry's room, filled with anger, and stomped her way downstairs with Harry trailing behind her. As they descended, Y/n couldn't help but notice the way Mr Dursley was staring at her, causing her to feel increasingly uncomfortable. Mrs Dursley, on the other hand, seemed to be giving her a deathly glare as they continued their stride.

"Where are you two off to, then?" Mr. Dursley inquired, his tone almost gleeful.

"The park," Harry responded icily, heading towards the door, while Y/n offered a forced smile, feeling awkward under the scrutiny.

"Are you really letting her go out like that? People will start asking questions!" Mrs. Dursley muttered with disapproval.

"Let them, dear. Let the lad have some normal company. The girl looks perfectly normal to me. Besides, now they'll think the boy's managed to find himself a girlfriend!" Mr. Dursley retorted.

"Then, aren't you going to say something to her?! That dress is simply..." Mrs Dursley began, her voice trailing off.

"I'm not her father, dear. She can wear whatever she pleases. And... it's not like I care enough to notice," he murmured the last part, barely audible.

Y/n quickly realized that her physical appearance was one of the main reasons why Mr. Dursley treated her with a bit more kindness. She overheard their conversation without much effort, as they weren't exactly discreet with their voices. However, she didn't care. She loved the blue floral sundress and how it made her feel. Yes, she attracted some unwanted attention from older men with their stares and whistles, but she refused to change herself for them. It wasn't the first time she had experienced such behaviour, and she wasn't about to let it dictate her choices.

Throughout their days together, Y/n and Harry found themselves engaged in similar activities—going to the park and returning home. It was only for two weeks, as Y/n's mom would soon come to pick her up, and she eagerly anticipated that moment. It wasn't that Y/n was being selfish regarding Harry's well-being; it was simply that she believed she needed to help herself before she could effectively assist him. However, after a few days, she pushed her own emotions aside to be there for Harry, to listen to his feelings, and yes, even their shared hormones often made it difficult to maintain control.

For Y/n, life was too short to wait around for Ron forever, pondering whether or not he liked her. So it was either him or his best friend.

"Can I?" Harry gasped, his chest heaving, their conversation interrupted by kisses.

Constant friction was made in her entry for her little shorts of spandex against Harry’s old jeans, the hot summer wasn’t helping these two teenagers without the supervision of serious adults who actually could take care of them. Y/n smirked at his comment while she kept making circles on his dressed cock, taking his wrists desperate to put them directly in her tits. Harry gasped one more time between the frantic kisses, he was in heaven.

“You like it?” she asked vigorously.

“Y- Yes… I like it” he said breathlessly “I love it”

Y/n smiled at his answer, moving his wrists to her hips. A more confident Harry moved his hands a bit more where her butt cheeks were squishing them, Y/n go faster at her pace and Harry got his hands under the fabric of her spandex shorts.

“You’re not wearing any underwear?” he asked briskly.

“Maybe, I don’t know. Is that a problem?” she asked teasingly.

“No, no. it’s better like that… Unless you don’t–”

“Are you asking me to have sex with you, Mr. Potter?” she asked naughtily.

Harry was speechless for the first time in a long time, of course, he wanted to, he would be mental if he didn’t want to. His jaw dropped for the small he felt for Y/n’s buoyancy and self-assure she had.

“Y- yes…” he tumbled.

“Oh, Mr. Potter you don’t have to be shy with me. I’ll do whatever you want, how can I help you?” she asked with her eyes fixed on him, now touching slowly above the fabric of his jeans in his cock, getting slowly under the cloth.

“Y/n, I don’t have any contraceptives…”

She knew it would be dumb if she said, «Don’t come inside me», there was still a small percentage of her getting pregnant for a normal teenager, but she wasn’t normal, first of all, she was a witch and the assistant of Madame Pomphrey in the hospital wing that had though her a lot of stuff.

“It’s ok, just don’t come inside of me, Harry. And we have to be quiet, right?”

Harry nodded hurriedly in understanding.

“Are you ok with not coming inside of me, Harry?” she smirked innocently.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s ok, Y/n,” he said panting. “Everything you do it’s ok”

“Really?” she asked, and he nodded in response. “So, it’s ok if I just…” she raised her eyebrows, going down on him.

Her soft hands travelled under his shirt gently caressing his naked abs, leaving him wanting more, with a high libido. Y/n left him a few small kisses in it and Harry looked at her to realize that she was doing a path in which he was desperately dying of pleasure for his panoramic view and his sensitive skin. Sitting on his lap while her curly hair fell over her face while wet kisses ran through his abs. Harry took her soft hair into a messy bun, letting her long eyelashes and soft kisses do the job, his chest grew rapidly, warming up from the girl’s kisses. And when she finished, Harry observed that she had traced a heart in his abs, it caused him so much pleasure to feel her on his lap that he made his head back, pushing his cock a little towards the entrance of the girl, who had liked the reaction while licking her lips, making more friction on her clitoris circling against Harry’s cock. He lifted her black orchid sundress to her belly, caressing it as she lowered the spaghetti straps of her shoulders.

“Can I, do it?” she asked beautifully.

“Please, Y/n,” he begged.

Passing the button on his jeans to the back, unbuttoning it, almost slow burning for Harry’s needs and desires; his heartbeat had increased almost dangerously, even though it wasn’t the first time he had done something intimate with Y/n – it would be his second time – he just felt the same excitement that the first time.

In the past, Harry had no idea what he was doing, he just lived in the moment, and every time he was with her, he felt out of the world. As of now, he was begging her to suck him and fuck him too.

“Are you sure, Harry? Do you want me to do it?” she asked, caressing with her hand the bulge of Harry’s pants, the cotton fabric was giving it a better sensation.

“Please Y/n, just do it, please”

“Hm…” she pretends to think about it for a second, her belly was asking her for something else just than fingers, desperately for something thicker, Harry’s cock.

“Please, I need you, I want you!”

She smiled at him, satisfied “Well, there’s a lot of people who need me…”

“Please, Y/n, I want you!”

She smirked mischievously rolling her eyes, noticing that the sunset was happening, and the beautiful sun was hiding behind the horizon.

“Ok, I’m gonna help you, Harry. Do you want that?”

“Yes, that’s what I want, please! It hurts!”

Y/n shook her head smiling, with the help of Harry hip trusting to take down his jeans and then his pants, showing the now awake cock of harry, it had a little curve that make it go up to his abs, and a bit of white precum was on the tip of it a little bushy but Y/n didn’t care at that moment, his cock was hard and ready to be in action. She took it with one of her hands and the other massaging Harry’s thigh, spitting in his cock almost immediately, stroking it briefly.

“Oh my god… Y/n, just like that!” Harry gasped.

Stroking in it up and down with no mercy in the fast that Harry would come with the visual he had of her boobs falling in front of him, not letting her go making pressure with his legs.

“Just take it out all on me”

“Oh, darling…” Harry groaned. “You do it so good… you take me so well.”

And for some reason that motivated Y/n to put it in her mouth, suck it and taste it with her tongue ‘salty’ she thought. Going up and down as her eyes start to fill with tears, sometimes she never thought about, was Harry pushing her head down to his hard venous cock.

“Ah… keep going!” Harry bellowed, pushing her head harshly to his cock. “That’s it, there… there”

Y/n didn’t even complain about this, she was so turned on, that she was masturbating with Harry’s knee, going on infinite circles. But before Harry could come, he took off her mouth his cock, switch the position quickly with a close of eyes, and cum in Y/n’s belly. Groaning and gasping about how good it was, landing in front of her, kissing her lips

“You did it soo good, darling, so good. Good girl.”

And that turned something on inside of Y/n, maybe the way he quickly switched her to the bottom of the bed or the way he had talked to her.

“Did I, Mr. Potter?”

[theupsidedownsrealestateagent]

Operation Croissant

Dear Mr. Hauser,

Hi it’s Robin Buckley, you know your favorite student, or well I guess you probably already knew that based on the envelope. I get it’s been awhile since we’ve spoken on account that I graduated four years ago, and I refuse to be the student that can’t let go of high school. I barely tolerated it when I was attending. 

The reason I’m writing to you is that I fulfilled my promise, I actually made three friends from good ol’ Hawkins High (bleh) and you would never guess who they are. Are you sitting down? If not you really really should before you continue reading. Okay back to what I was saying, I made three friends for Operation Croissant. 

Nancy Wheeler, Eddie Munson, and um… Steve Harrington. 

You better not be looking smug Mr. Hauser, why do I feel like you’re definitely smirking right now? So yeah, somehow against all my best efforts Steve Harrington is my soulmate. Strictly platonic soulmate. The four of us (and I got permission to reveal this information I promise) are fellow friends of Dorothy. It’s okay take your time to process that, I sure did. I have a sneaking suspicion that you may have already known about me, and Eddie insists that you must have known about him. Subtle isn’t really his style. 

There was so much stuff about high school and life I was missing, and I never cared about until our lunches. For a long time I thought I was going to live this life alone. I didn’t think that this little group was an option for someone like me, like us. I was wrong, I was so wrong. I’m dating the girl of my dreams, she’s so smart, doesn’t care that I ramble a bunch of nonsense when I’m nervous, she is the most badass, beautiful woman in the world, and I found her here in Hawkins of all places. Then there’s Eddie who I know looks like that but he genuinely is the sweetest dude ever, I really wish he could’ve been there for our chats, the kid just needed anyone to confide in, to tell him he wasn’t a freak, that he wasn’t alone either. He’s smart too, smarter than what those teachers ever gave him credit for. Now for my Stevie, yeah he was an asshole back in school, but I watched him turn into the biggest dork of the twentieth century. We became reluctant parents to seven feral children together. I’m sure you’ve been acquainted with Dustin Henderson and co, for that we are all very sorry, we are working on them. So yeah Steve and I found out we practically share braincells, trauma bonded for life, we’ve both saved each other like at least seventeen different times at this point, but legally I can’t talk about any of those (trust me you don’t even want to know) so yeah Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley, sisters for life. We aren’t even the strangest duo in our group, Eddie and Steve are literally boyfriends and it is the weirdest thing that makes the most amount of sense if you saw how they look at each other. Nancy and I on the other hand are classy about our love (this is a lie, we are probably even more disgusting then the guys. But don’t tell Nancy.) 

Whew that was a long winded paragraph, hope it wasn’t too wordy and got my point across that I love these idiots, and if it wasn’t for you I don’t think I ever would have been comfortable enough with myself to find and trust them. I hope you keep finding those kids who don’t feel like they belong. Most of all I hope you are just as happy and fulfilled as the way you helped me to be. Thanks for everything Mr. Hauser.

Eternally grateful,

Robin Buckley

[doux-amer]

Yet another pandemic year, yet another bad year for movies. I’m hoping 2023 will be better because it was a desert out there. These were my 2022 favorites.

When Harry Met Sally

In 1977, college graduates Harry Burns and Sally Albright share a contentious car ride from Chicago to New York, during which they argue about whether men and women can ever truly be strictly platonic friends. Ten years later, Harry and Sally meet again at a bookstore and attempt to stay friends without sex becoming an issue between them.

HANDS DOWN, FAVORITE ROMCOM. I don’t know how I made it this far without watching this movie, but I love it to bits. Enemies-to-lovers cooked to perfection! The relationship is convincing and so sweet. Genuine friendship between a man and a woman! Their friendship was just as important to me as their budding romance, if not more. Please, I want a relationship like theirs. 🥺

Do the Right Thing

On the hottest day of the year on a street in the Bedford-Stuyvesant section of Brooklyn, everyone's hate and bigotry smolders and builds until it explodes into violence.

This just about obliterated me. I can’t begin to express how powerful this movie is and how stirring and riveting it is. I want to say it’s timeless and important because it’s a masterpiece—and it is—but the most depressing thing is part of its relevancy is due to the fact that little if anything has changed since 1989. We’re still here, with the same problems. You need to watch this if you haven’t already. And yes, I made this sound all serious (and it is. I had a long conversation with someone about it), but this is kinetic so you’re never bored and you want to munch on the vibrant visuals and sound too. It doesn’t shy away from the good and the ugly in all the characters. 

Everything Everywhere All at Once

An aging Chinese immigrant is swept up in an insane adventure, where she alone can save what’s important to her by connecting with the lives she could have led in other universes.

Okay, I’m going to come out and say (again) that this movie wasn’t as good as I had hoped it would be, but most of my criticism comes from my personal dissatisfaction with how Asian American filmmakers deal with stories of immigration and diaspora through the family lens. BUT! But. It’s the most innovative and colorful and boldest movie of 2022 and of recent times. They took risks on the script! The visuals! Everything! If you haven’t seen this, what are you doing? We need more films like this that are refreshingly original and dare to break the mold.

The Bob’s Burgers Movie

When a ruptured water main creates an enormous sinkhole right in front of Bob’s Burgers, it blocks the entrance indefinitely and ruins the Belchers’ plans for a successful summer. While Bob and Linda struggle to keep the business afloat, the kids try to solve a mystery that could save their family’s restaurant. As the dangers mount, these underdogs help each other find hope and fight to get back behind the counter, where they belong.

Look, I love Bob’s Burgers enough to shell out money to watch this in a theater. And it was worth it because it had all the heart and humor of the show, but it was longer and the animation was great and had more of a budget behind it! I was “ooh”-ing at some stuff even if it wasn’t anything crazy. It’s a feel-good movie and I love the Belchers. 

Atonement

As a 13-year-old, fledgling writer Briony Tallis irrevocably changes the course of several lives when she accuses her older sister’s lover of a crime he did not commit.

Ohhhhh wow. I get while everyone was and remains obsessed with this movie. I’ve never seen a Joe Wright movie before, and I almost don’t want to because surely this was his magnus opum. The sexual tension and chemistry, the devastating accusation! Love trying to prevail in spite of everything! THE REVEAL AT THE END HAD ME CRYING. And it’s so sumptuous!?!??!?!? I’m obsessed with the visuals and everything Joe Wright did. 

TÁR

Renowned musician Lydia Tár is days away from recording the symphony that will elevate her career when all elements seem to conspire against her as her past behavior comes to light.

What a terrible summary. Anyway, this. If I weren’t rooting for Michelle Yeoh to sweep all the Best Actress, I would be behind Cate Blanchett. A charismatic, magnetic performance for the ages. Girlboss lesbian villain. Despicable! But you can’t stop watching her! I wasn’t emotionally swept away by it, but you’re not supposed to; it’s a cold, distant movie on purpose and it’s good brain candy as you position it in the #MeToo (post-#MeToo?) era. Plus, again, Cate Blanchett.

Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio

During the rise of fascism in Mussolini’s Italy, a wooden boy brought magically to life struggles to live up to his father’s expectations.

MY SON. MY SUNSHINE SON. PLEASE LOOK AT MY BOY. This isn’t a perfect movie (I think the relationship between Pinocchio and Geppetto could have been developed more and there was more focus on Geppetto as he has an emotional transformation), but it’s beautiful and gentle and ugh. You can’t help but root for films that are clearly passion projects and ones that are made with such love, care, and immense talent. I recommend watching the “making of” featurette too! 

Movies I want to mention even if I didn’t enjoy them or I did but had major issues with them

The Wedding Banquet - when you say “Ang Lee” and “gay movie,” you think Brokeback Mountain. Never heard of this movie before and the plot is amazing. Really, really rough as it’s an early Ang Lee work with inexperienced acting and one distasteful scene, but I think it’s important a film like this exists and shows a gay couple happy and in love (this was made in 1993!). It was meh, but I’m putting it here for that reason and because I wish there was a remake except this is firmly entrenched in that era

Spider-Man: No Way Home - basically just for the Green Goblin and Doc Ock and for the last minutes when everyone forgets Peter and he starts over with literally nothing. He has nothing. This is the most interested I’ve ever been in Peter (I hated the second movie and have lots of complaints about MCU Spidey even though I grew up uninterested in Peter and still am largely uninterested in the Spidey side of things). You can call this his true origin story. I’m hating on this too much. It’s not a good movie, but I went in with zero expectations because I hated the second movie and this was better than it and at least entertaining when you don’t care about the movie and you turn off your brain.

Turning Red - Okay, truthfully, I LOATHE this movie, but if you cut out 80% of it lmao, it’s really cute and I LOVE the animation. You can immediately tell someone who grew up with anime made it. It’s the most visually original Pixar movie in a long time, at least. The nostalgia for those boy band squeeing days was nice too. But god, the writing! I’m mad.

The Silence of the Lambs - I’m bummed to say that I didn’t get fully obsessed with this movie like I thought I would. I thought it was good. I just...didn’t go crazy over it. Jodie Foster and Anthony Hopkins are sooooooooo great in it though! SOOOO GOOD. Also, I have a very special thing that happened in connection to this movie, but it’s too personal to say here. But! It’s something that will stay with me because I’m grateful for it and I’ll remember it every time I think of it.

[foxdies]

like i’m dating my best friend.. yknow how that feels?

[ijustwant2write]

A Secret Romantic-Benedict Bridgerton x Reader x Eloise Bridgerton (Platonic)

(GIF credit to @aryaofoldstones​)

Requested by anonymous: ‘Hello! I saw your looking for Bridgerton requests, I would love some Benedict x Eloise sibling fluff! They have such a good dynamic in the show and I need more’

(I wouldn’t mind making another part of this if people want it tbh)

Characters: Benedict Bridgerton x Reader, Eloise Bridgerton x Reader (platonic)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

(Y/L/N)=Your last name

Warnings: Fluff, fluff, fluff

                                     *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Eloise’s gloved hands clung onto her book as she and her family arrived at yet another social event, a ball once again. Her mama had ensured she was dressed to catch the eyes of men, and Eloise knew that meant there would be no room for intelligent conversation. With Daphne now married to the Duke, Eloise had more pressure on her shoulders than she imagined, having to find a suitor of similar standards. However, it wasn’t just her on the market, her brothers were too, especially Benedict (Violet knew it would be extremely difficult to marry off Anthony first, opting for the second eldest son).

Eloise smiled whenever her mama looked her way, though it quickly disappeared once she turned around. Benedict had been instructed to escort her sister around the ball to help seek out suitors, the men knew each other or something about someone; he could help her meet the right one.

“I cannot believe I am here.” Eloise moaned as she looped her arm through her brothers.

“Believe me sister, I do not wish to be here either.”

“Why must you parade me around like a horse at a dressage in order to find a new owner?” Eloise kept catching the men’s gazes, turning up her nose in disgust.

“So dramatic.” he chuckled.

She scoffed.“Well, if you’re going to advise me on who I should be marrying, I shall do the same for you. Now let’s see...”

Eloise looked around the room at all the women, wondering who would be the best match for her brother. Most of these women had no personalities, relying on their outfits to express themselves. Eloise knew of some ladies that were nice, though had nothing in common with her brother.

Eloise shrugged, tugging on her brother’s arm towards the door.“Ah, there’s no one here for us. Let us make haste and leave-”

“Oh no you don’t,” Benedict pulled her back,“we have been strictly told to stay for the night, even if it is just to socialise and...get our names out there.”

Eloise groaned a little too loudly, Ben ducking his head in embarrassment.“How long do these balls go on for?”

“I have never stayed for the full duration.”

“That’s not the answer I want to hear.”

Benedict glanced down at her, somehow only just realising that Eloise had brought a book with her.“Is that book sewed to your hand sister?”

“I brought it just in case I became bored. Which I am already.”

“I shall go and grab us some refreshments. Might as well enjoy them whilst we’re here.”

Eloise let her brother slip away, quickly finding a hiding spot by leaning up against a wall, away from the hustle and bustle of the crowds. She opened her book, continuing where she left off, happy she brought a pencil to scribble down notes for later. The studying never stopped for Eloise. 

“Excuse me?” a woman’s voice interrupted her too soon.

Eloise tried her best to be polite, though her smile came off as sarcastic.“Yes?”

“Sorry,” the woman looked taken back,“I thought you were reading a book that I am reading at the moment, but I was wrong. I’ve disturbed you, I shall leave you alone-”

“Wait,” Eloise had now sparked an interest. No other lady had ever approached her like this,“I don’t mean to be rude. What book had you expected?”

“It’s oh so obvious, but I’ve been reading ‘Pride and Prejudice’ by Jane Austen. It’s the newest book out at the moment, and my mama lets me read it seeing as it involves a woman finding someone to marry. Although, it’s definitely about something deeper, that’s just what I told her.”

“I don’t indulge in romantic novels myself, but I am glad to hear of a female author selling her work.”

“It’s fantastic. And it’s nice to be able to read something without it being snatched out of my hands. Oh, where are my manners? I’m (Y/N) (Y/L/N). Sorry, I’ve been dancing with men all night and none of the conversations have been as riveting as this so far.”

“Why am I not surprised?” they both laughed.“I’m Eloise Bridgerton.”

(Y/N) tried to not show her shock when she heard the surname. They were only the most talked about family, her mama had gone on and on about them, especially when Lady Whistledown mentioned them in her writings. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you. Might I ask what it is that you are reading?”

“It is to do with my studies. I truly hate these events, so I thought I would ensure my mind was being worked properly.” Eloise realised that could come off as rude, squeezing her eyes shut in embarrassment.“I did not mean to offend you by that.”

“It really isn’t any bother.” (Y/N) giggled.“I rather enjoy these just for the dancing and drinks, I find promenading to be more successful in finding a suitor. Though I would much rather sneak off and see if I can get a few more pages in of a book I shouldn’t be reading.”

“Eloise, why must you go wondering off like that...” Benedict’s words trailed off as he approached his sister, spotting a beautiful woman stood by her.

Eloise’s eyes flickered between the two, and she smiled when she saw the adoration in her brother’s eyes. Cheekily taking the two glasses from his hands, she passed one to (Y/N), who awkwardly took it. (Y/N) had gazed upon the Bridgerton men in passing, they were very nice to look at. Of course, she never divulged in any fantasies about them, that would be silly. But seeing one in front of her had taken her breath away.

“Thank you brother.” Eloise said, taking a sip.“This is Lady (Y/N) (Y/L/N), a new friend of mine.”

He gently took her free hand in his, bending forwards slightly to kiss it. (Y/N) had this done to her many times, but this was different. Benedict made her feel butterflies in her stomach. Eloise could tell her mama was going to love this.

She cleared her throat.“We were just speaking of art, actually.”

(Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows.“We were talking about books.”

“I was about to move the topic along.”

“What kind of art would that be then?” Benedict asked, knowing what game his sister was playing. 

“The...drawing, kind.”

“Isn’t all art drawn?”

“No, it is also painted.”

“I think artists may sketch out a rough idea before painting.”

“Well you would know brother, seeing as you yourself are an artist.”

“I wouldn’t say that-”

“You paint, Lord Bridgerton?” (Y/N) asked.

“Ah, yes, and I sketch.” he hoped his cheeks weren’t turning red. 

“Anything in particular?”

“Mostly people.”

“Are you both attending the art exhibition my family are holding next week?”

“That’s your families’ exhibit?” Benedict became excited.

“Yes, my father collects a lot of art work. Then mother realised she could make a social event out of it, but at least everyone will be able to admire the work.”

“Would you believe it, we already have it noted down in our social calendar!” Eloise informed (Y/N). Benedict could sense her over-reacting, trying to keep a smile as (Y/N)’s face lit up in excitement. 

“Perfect!” (Y/N) looked back up at Ben, making him stand a little taller.“It will be nice to have someone there who knows about the artwork. It will make for an interesting conversation. Just don’t let my father lecture you, he will talk for far too long! And I know you will be too polite to try and get away.”

“My brother is very polite.” Eloise said.“In fact, I’m surprised he hasn’t-”

“Excuse me for the intrusion,” a young man said from beside (Y/N),“but I was wondering if we could resume our dance lady (Y/N)?”

(Y/N) was smiling, but Eloise knew that look; it was the face women made when a man who made them uncomfortable approached, but they had to remain ladylike and polite.

“Actually my brother just asked her and she said yes. You two best make your way to the floor before the music starts again.” Eloise nudged her brother.

Benedict was confused at his sisters offer, until he locked eyes with (Y/N) again. They were pleading him to sweep her away, she was even leaning away from this man. He had been disrespectful in some way, and he wasn’t letting (Y/N) go through that again (despite only knowing the girl for a few minutes). He smugly smiled at the man, holding out his arm which (Y/N) took a little too quickly. Eloise was happy with herself as the pair walked off, sending the man a death glare when he asked her to dance instead. Once he left, her eyes went back to find her brother, who was already dancing with (Y/N), both smiling and laughing. Her mama was going to be ecstatic about this. 

                                       *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Eloise sat in the drawing room, obviously lounging with a book. Her younger siblings were being irritating as usual, running around her in circles. Before they arrived, she had peace. Eloise wanted a few moments alone, because she knew her mama would be bursting with questions about the night before.

“Ah, there you are.” Violet said as she walked in.

The book flopped into Eloise’s lap, a frown on her face. There goes her reading time.

“So, how was last night? Did you meet anyone?” her mama sat beside her.“You two, go play outside if you’re going to run around please.”

The children stopped as their mama spoke, sending each other devilish grins before they ran out of the room again, their giggling echoing down the halls. Violet went to shout after them, but decided to leave it be, there were more pressing matters.

“Well mama, do you see any suitors?” Eloise gestured around her.

Violet sighed.“Did you even try last night?”

“My life will not be reduced to a single night where I was forced to peacock around in order to please a man.”

“Oh, Eloise, must you make everything so dramatic?”

“Funny, Benedict said the same thing.”

“Actually, where is your brother? I have not seen him all morning.”

“He went out.” Eloise was relieved that the focus would now be off of her.“He’s calling upon a lady.”

Violet’s eyes widened.“What? When? Who?”

“Lady (Y/N) (Y/L/N).”

“(Y/L/N)? They are quite reputable.”

Eloise rolled her eyes.“Mama, she is a lovely girl. I don’t think you should just judge her on what family she comes from.”

“Oh, so you approve of this girl?”

“I...I mean...Well, I only spoke with her for a mere few minutes.”

“But?”

Eloise let out a huff.“I enjoyed her company. I think Benedict likes her. I didn’t see him for the rest of the night until it was time to leave. He spent all his time with her.”

Violet became overjoyed.“Oh, what marvelous news! I wish he had told me. Do you know what he took to her? Flowers? Food?”

“I have no idea mama. Just wait for his return and he will tell you all the details. I am not a psychic.”

Violet was impatient as she awaited the return of her son. Poor Collin had also been questioned when he showed up in the drawing room, but he had overslept in bed, waking with a terrible headache. It seemed that it was about to come back to him when his mama bombarded him with questions as to why he hadn’t called upon anyone that morning. Eloise kept her giggles quiet, ducking behind her book when Collin sent her daggers.

Poor Benedict had no idea what was in store for him. His cheeks were aching from how much he was smiling. He wasn’t surprised when he arrived at the (Y/L/N)’s house and saw multiple callers for (Y/N). However, jealousy rose inside him when he thought about these men dancing with her, trying to convince her that they were the man to marry. He held a beautiful bouquet of flowers, remembering that (Y/N) had mentioned her favourite the night before. Looking around at any other flowers she received, he was glad to see no other gentleman had chose it. Surely that would show he was listening? He endured sonnets, stories, songs and boasting from the other men, trying not to show his dissatisfaction as each one stepped forward. There was pressure that her parents were there, especially when he realised he was the last gentleman, everyone else had left.

(Y/N) had been incredibly anxious when she saw Benedict that morning. He had been the only man she genuinely smiled at, hoping he came at his own will, not forced by his mama. The night before had been the best ball (Y/N) had ever been to. Benedict was sweet, charming, handsome and interesting. They were able to talk about anything and everything, no small talk involved like all the other men she danced with. He had swooned her, and here he was, calling upon her. 

Back at the Bridgerton house, Violet had not sat down since talking Collin’s ear off. Eloise was still in the drawing room with her, as were her two youngest siblings, munching on biscuits as they threw questions at their mama. She did not have all the answers, sometimes not even hearing them speak for she was too deep in her thoughts. At one point, she did sit, but beside the window, o the lookout for any signs of her son. When a carriage pulled up in front of the house, Violet leapt out of her seat, startling her children. She made a beeline to the door, standing there with her hands clasped together. When Benedict walked in, he too flinched, not expecting his mama to be there.

“Mama, how long have you been stood there?” Benedict asked as he walked past her, pinching a biscuit from his brother’s plate.

“She’s been waiting for you.” Eloise explained, also excited to hear about his calling.

“I hope you sat down at some point.” he joked, sitting beside Eloise and slouching.

Violet hurried to sit on the sofa across him.“You didn’t tell me you were calling on a lady this morning.”

“Well, we got back late from the ball yesterday evening, and I had to leave early to ensure I got there in good time. Though it seemed every other man thought that too.”

“There were many men there?” 

“Yes, quite a few.”

Eloise straightened up at her brother’s grumpy expression.“You really like her!”

“How wonderful!” Violet gushed. 

“Do not get ahead of yourselves.”

“But you do, don’t you? Otherwise you wouldn’t have called on her.”

Ben was lost for words. He couldn’t argue with that, and he did like seeing his mama happy.“Yes, yes I do. And it would seem she reciprocates the feelings.”

“This is such good news! I must see what our social calendar looks like, we must ensure you two spend time together.”

“Actually mama-” Eloise went to tell her about the art exhibit until Ben interrupted.

“Good idea mama.” he nodded, smiling at her as she walked away, a spring in her step. Once she was gone, he let out a big breath.“I just needed a moment without questions from her.”

“Well, you’re going to have questions from me.” Eloise angled her body to face him, her elbow perched on the sofa with her face resting in her hand.“I didn’t think you were going to call upon her. Are my match making skills really that good?”

“I hate to admit it, but yes, you have done an excellent job.” Benedict felt relaxed thinking about (Y/N).

“So, what happened this morning?”

“I took her flowers, she told me her favourites last night, and then I had to sit there whilst her other gentleman callers desperately tried to impress her. It was agony! Finally I was able to have time with her, and it was just...I don’t know how to put it into words.”

“Did you bring her anything else?”

Benedict became bashful.“I brought her a sketchbook, like the one I have. She mentioned how she used to often sketch when she was younger. I thought it would be a unique gift.”

“Benedict, you truly are a romantic at heart.”

“For her I am, yes.”

Eloise smiled for her brother, until a smirk fell on his face.“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Aw, is someone also a secret romantic?”

“No!” Eloise protested, quickly grabbing her book again.“I am just happy you found someone.”

“And you helped, because you secretly want everyone to find someone.”

“No I don’t! You’re ruining this moment now Benedict.”

“Don’t worry Eloise, you’ll find someone.” Ben joked.

She groaned.“You are insufferable...but I still want to go to that art exhibit.”

“To see love bloom?”

“N-no, to see the art work.”

“Of course, of course. But, thank you Eloise.”

She tried not to smile, but couldn’t help it.“You’re welcome.”

[kepnerandavery]

Hii, i'm rewatching s14 Japril scenes and omg is so confusing (i know that bad writing and bts drama had influence but i'm trying to make sense of that season lol)

So first we have the we don't talk about montana shit and the cursed 14x02 scene, i guess they were trying to portray that J dosen't care about A feelings and that he move on and is in love with his sister, but idk, why is he mute, like was he no allowed to talk lol? He could have say that it was a mistake or something like that, idk is a weird scene, i can't understand his face.

Then when April starts losing her mind, Jackson is the first one who noticed and tries to talk to her multiple times (not her best friend Arizona or idk Owen he always cares about her) and keeps looking at her and reaching to her (when she has the banana bag, when he say he's worried for her, talking to arizona, the supply closet scene, the play games scene, when he tells maggie that he's gonna try talk to her again and watches her walk away, the hug scene (when he is mute again🙄) and she tells him that she's okay to take harriet and he ask if SHE is ok like worrying about her in particular) Why made him been the one noticed about her crisis, asking, looking at her, reaching multiple times.. and episodes before he supposedly didn't care about her(14x02), like i don't get it.

And then episodes later boom, Jackson looses completely his shit about April almost death in a way that still surprised me that Krista and all the bitches allow him to have, his reaction at matthew in the hospital scene, his first face when he saw him proposing to april and when he avoids the stare after they kiss. (And yess he smiles but he smiled in season 9 in the first proposal and we now how that went and maybe is wishfull thinking but he looks even sadder, the smile seem very sad and like it took effort)

And why put april saying you're my.. Like why leave that open there and they look at each other lips and the way that he touches her arm like omg, everything is so damn confusing

Oh and the next season you have him talking about April with Maggie

- I prayed and April woke up

- Who else are you talking too? April sometimes..

- I didn't picture my marriage ending

- I'm greaving, GREAVING (Jackson, baby you already divorce years ago lol)

- Now is too late, SHE'S happy with someone else (he dosen't even want to name Matthew lol)

Honestly, what was Krista thinking? Idk what she tried to achieved in those scenes but damn, it fail hard lol

Anyways, thoughts? Sorry for the rant, i looked at a couple of your posts and wanted to share..

First of all, Hi! Second, You never have to apologize for ranting about japril on my blog cause this whole blog is pretty much filled with a series of japril rants lol.

I have always thought that Krista was trying to accomplish a few things through her awful creative decision making.

1) She wanted to portray japril as strictly platonic friends, and beat us in the head with that fact until we lost our minds.

2) She wanted to take some important details about japril’s relationship, and use that to push Jackson towards Maggie (eg: they wrote the story about Maggie’s mom’s death, and tried to replicate the hurt/comfort trope that japril always showcased, and the fire in 13x24 was similar to the bus explosion in 9x24). And that is also just lazy writing on their part cause they couldn't even come up with an original way to start Jackson's new "relationship".

3) Imo, most of 14x24 and some of the callbacks to japril after season 14 were simply a slap in the face to japril fans. And I bet they also wanted the engagement from japril fans on twitter cause our fandom is a force to be reckoned with on social media, so when Jackson mentioned April, the fans started talking about them, and Grey’s Anatomy also got talked about in the process. They were using us even after letting Sarah go. The sheer audacity of Krista, I tell you!

With that being said, I also believe that some of the writers on the show (the ones with a spine and half a brain cell that is), wrote some of the scenes where they showed Jackson struggling without April cause it was how the story should have been written. Plus Jesse is great, and he fully understands his character so he might have had something to do with the japril mentions too.

Now onto some specific scenes you mentioned,

First, there's the infamous 13x16 ep. I just re-watched Sarah and Jesse's Q&A for that ep to answer your ask, and connected some dots. So according to Sarah, 13x16 was filmed right after they filmed 13x09 (which is when April tried to start dating again and Jackson looked miserable at the prospect of it). And the eps in between were written and filmed afterwards. Sarah also said that she and Jesse collaborated with Elisabeth Finch (the writer of 13x16) and made some changes to the script, so I think their collaboration, Elisabeth's writing, and Kevin Mckidd's direction made that episode amazing. And I also think that the writers had planned to get japril back together around the time 13x16 was being filmed, and Krista interviewed after they shot the ep. When she took over the show, she made it clear that she disliked japril, then she waited a few months before starting to assert her dominance and making stupid decisions. The eps between 13x09 and 13x16 were written after they shot 13x16, and those eps were used to sideline April and pull japril apart, but then they had to still air 13x16 (which was already shot). Then in the next ep, we saw Jackson treating Maggie’s mom, and we all know what that lead to. So it was all a planned ambush. If Krista had her way, we would probably not have gotten japril the sequel at all.

When it comes to their scene in 14x02, something tells me that they had Jackson not say anything because if he actually talked in that scene, Sarah and Jesse’s chemistry would not have made the scene believable. That scene was intended indicate the end of japril’s relationship. Sarah has mentioned how she had to ask the director to change April's demeanor in that scene, and I think they initially wanted April to be angry with Jackson instead of hurt by him so that she would’ve looked resentful. I'm glad Sarah asked for the change to be made. Bless Sasse for still making that scene believable though cause it's painful to watch.

As for the scenes where Jackson noticed April was struggling with her faith in season 14, and tried to help her. I think the writers tried to show their friendship in those scenes cause Jackson was still the person that knew April the best. But from what I've seen of those eps, it didn't feel like japril's friendship was super intact through that time. And the kiss scene in 14x16 felt like a punch in the gut for me. If they wanted to show japril's friendship, they could have showed him helping her as a friend, but no, they had to add that scene and break our hearts. At the end of the day, he didn't really get to be there for her, and it only made April sadder. So it's clear that the scene was unnecessary and a slap in our faces.

Then the scenes in 14x23.. The ep was written by William Harper (aka the person who wrote the iconic 10x12 ep), so we can guess why those scenes were so good. But for me, unless you play close attention to Jesse's expressions, you can't tell that japril were too far from being platonic friends in that episode. Imagine how Jackson would have reacted to April nearly dying in the end of season 8 or through seasons 9,10,11, or 12, and compare that to how he was in 14x23. Yes, he was devastated, and Jesse's performance was amazing. But for me, it seemed like both he and Sarah were trying to not portray japril as a romantic couple in that ep. But their chemistry in those scenes was so undeniable that it still made me die inside. Regardless of that, I don't think the director of that ep intended for those scenes to be viewed that way.

And then you have the scene where Jackson talked about struggling with his grief/regretting their divorce. When they wrote storylines for Jackson’s character after April was no longer in his life to the degree that she was before, they couldn’t simply erase years' worth of history that belonged to his character. So whether Krista liked it or not, Jackson’s inner turmoils and the circumstances he was in had a lot to do with losing Samuel, and going through his divorce. So the writers might have been forced to call back to some of those past moments for the purpose of creating drama in the show.

In other words, screw Krista! 😭

[derangedangel]

Kiss Interrupted - Klaus Mikaelson

Summary: Almost kiss, but interrupted for @idkhaylijah’s 3k followers challenge

Klaus Mikaelson x Reader

Word Count: 3,663

Author’s Note: Watch Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist which inspired this fic... okay it’s literally the base of this fic. Also, I didn’t realize until half way through it should be under 2k... sorry lol. Also the dress description I tried to give is the dress from Anastasia when she goes to the ballet. I haven’t posted in almost a year so be gentle please. 

It was a quiet afternoon in the Mikaelson home and you were enjoying a lunch with Rebekah. These moments where rare and few. You told your friend you didn’t feel like going out so she had lunch brought to the two of you. The dining table was set up beautifully so you still felt like you were dinging at one of New Orleans’s finest restaurants. Elijah was off to the side, enjoying a new novel. 

“Dear sister, why didn’t I receive an invitation to your lunch,” Klaus asked making his presence known as he entered from his study. 

Rebecca sighed placing her raspberry lemonade down before she acknowledged her annoying brother. “Nik, if you want to go on a lunch date with Y/N, just ask her yourself,” she quipped then smirked at Klaus. 

Your eyes grew as you paused mid-fork lift at Rebekah’s statement. 

Klaus replied quickly, no one noticing you get flustered at the thought of Klaus and you on a date. “I just wanted to bond with my little sister.”

“Oh, rubbish,” Rebekah said.

After you regained your composure you spoke up. “Would you care to join us, Klaus? There’s plenty of food.”

Rebekah spoke up before Klaus could respond. “Don’t offer him anything, Y/N. He’s just trying to bother us.”

Ignoring his sister Klaus smiled at you and said, “Thank you, love, but I’ll pass.”

“See, you don’t have to be nice to him,” Rebekah said, taking another sip of her drink.

“I like your family, Beks,” you replied, smiling at your friend. “In fact, I was thinking about having a dinner for my birthday next week if you would all like to come,” you asked looking at each of the Mikaelsons in the room.

Rebekah looked at you in shock. “Your birthday is next week?! How did I not know this?”

“Well, we’ve only know each other for a little over a year and last year when it was my birthday you Mikaelsons were having one of your... wars in the quarter,” you answered Rebekah but eyed Klaus at the last part of your sentence. 

Klaus raised his hands up in defense. “Don’t blame me. Blame the witches.”

“No friend of mine’s is just going to have a bloody dinner for her birthday,” Rebekah protested.

“Rebekah, I’ve had 49 other birthdays before this one. It’s no big deal,” you said nonchalantly before you took another bite of your meal.

“You’re turning 50,” Rebekah practically screeched. 

“Yeah. I’m a vampire, birthdays really don’t mean much anymore. I’m fine with a quiet dinner. I don’t need a lot of fuss over it.”

“Oh poppycock, Y/N. Fifty is a huge deal, regardless of the fact that you’re a vampire now. I’m throwing you a party. End of discussion,” Rebekah said then wiped the side of her mouth with her napkin and preceded to get up.

“You really don’t ha-,” you began to say but Rebekah interrupted you.

“No, I don’t want to hear it. The party is already in motion. And you deserve it.”

Elijah finally spoke up from his quiet corner, flipping the page in his book as he spoke. “There’s no use in fighting it, Y/N. Once my sister has plans for an event in her head, there’s no stopping her.”

You sighed, “Fine, do what you must Rebekah.”

“Fantastic,” Rebekah said clasping her hands together in joy. “And you won’t have to worry about a thing. I’ll start planning right now.”

                                                        ~.~

A few days later, you were once again at the Mikaelson home. It started to feel like you were there more than you were at your own place. But as a vampire, you had nothing but time and wanted to spend it with people you cared about. 

You sat at the kitchen counter while Klaus poured you some blood.

“How’s the party planning going,” Klaus asked making eye contact with you as he finished pouring. 

“I wouldn’t know. The only thing Bekah asked me about was a guest list and colors. She told me to come over this morning and that’s all I know.”

“I suppose she’s staying to true to the part about you not having to worry then,” Klaus said. He poured himself a glass of blood as well, but was standing on the other side of the counter. You were happy with the distance. For the past few months, something was brewing between you and the hybrid. You tried to ignore it. It was wrong. Klaus was Rebekah’s brother. He had a daughter to worry about and a city to rule. Not to mention, you knew he was trouble. It was best just to be strictly platonic with Klaus.

“I wish that were the case. From what I’ve seen, she’s going all out. A huge ball, which is completely unnecessary. And, no offense, but I’ve heard whenever you Mikaelsons throw a ball, something bad goes down.”

Klaus took a sip from his glass and titled his head. “In our defense, when we through a ball, it’s usually a ploy to find out what the wolves, witches, or other vampires are up too, or stake our claim in a new town.”

“So your record of successful, nondeath having balls would be?”

Klaus paused and thought for a moment. “None.”

“See,” you shouted pointing out the potential problem with your birthday party. 

A small smile graced Klaus’s face as he shook his head. “I’m sure your birthday will be the exception to that record.”

“How do you know,” you asked worried. Klaus began to move closer to your side of the counter. 

“No one would dare ruin a ball in your honor,” Klaus answered in a slightly serious tone.

“Okay, but how do you know that? Things have been pretty good for your family lately. And what would be a better time to strike than at a ball?”

“I wouldn’t allow anything to ruin your night. I’ll make sure the entirety of New Orleans knows not to try anything on Saturday night. They can burn down the city on Sunday for all I care, but I’ll rip their throats out if they try anything on Saturday,” Klaus replied. Somehow in your worriedness over your party, Klaus ended up right in front of you. 

You chuckled at Klaus’s statement. “You’d do that for me?”

“Of course.”

The two of you stared at each other in silence. Klaus could hear your heart pounding in your chest and you knew it from the way he smirked. He glanced down at your lips and you swallowed out of nervousness. He began to lean in slowly and you knew what was coming. You wanted this to happen. You had imagined how Klaus’s lips would feel against your own and it was finally about to happen. Forget your hesitance about why you should just be friends. You wanted him.

Your eyelids fluttered closed but then the two of you jumped apart at the sound of footsteps approaching the kitchen.

“Y/N,” Hope shouted excitedly. 

“Hope,” you replied just as excitedly trying to ignore the pit in your stomach from almost kissing Klaus.

“Aunt Beks told me all about your party and I was wondering...,” she started then lingered hoping you would get the hit before she even had to ask.

You nodded smiling at the teenager. “Yes, Hope, you can invited whatever boy you have in mind.”

“Thank you,” she said eagerly as she hugged you.

“Boy?” Klaus perked up from where he now stood behind the counter again. “What boy?”

Hope looked to her father, but you spoke up before things had to get awkward between the lovestruck teenager and her overprotective father. “Oh Klaus, let the girl bring a date. It’s my party and I’m allowing it.”

“Well she’s my daughter,” Klaus replied.

“And it’s my party,” you said, eyes gleaming at Klaus. You had a sort of confidence at the fact that Klaus was going to kiss you. A boost in your ego if you will. “You wouldn’t deny the birthday girl what she wants on her birthday, would you?”

Klaus leaned over the counter smirking at you. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

You smiled back knowingly at him. 

You were a little lost in Klaus’s eyes so you didn’t initially notice when Rebekah entered the room.

“Alright, we’re already getting a late start. We’ve got to get moving, Y/N,” Rebekah said.

You turned away from Klaus to face your friend. “A late start on what, Bekah?”

“Dress shopping,” Rebekah said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. We have to find you a gown and have a seamstress tailor it to you. You have to look absolutely flawless on Saturday. I want it to look like you were born in that dress.”

You sighed closing your eyes to prepare yourself for the long day you knew you were about to have. Granted, you loved an extravagant gown and didn’t usually have a reason to wear one. But you knew Rebekah in party planning mode wasn’t going to be easy to deal with. “Fine, let me grab my bag and we can go.”

“Can I come too,” Hope asked looking between you and her aunt.

“Of course,” you smiled, happy to bring a buffer between you and Rebekah. 

                                                        ~.~

You were currently in your fourth dress. “Rebekah this is Hopeless.”

“I’m literally right here,” Hope said being cheeky.

You scowled at her joke and turned in the mirror. “I’m not loving any of these dresses. And this is our second store!”

“Be patient, darling,” Rebekah said as she went though another rack of dresses. “The prefect dress is here somewhere. Well, at least the perfect last minute dress.”

“Oh and speaking of last minute,” you said, stepping off the podium that was in front of the mirror, “I don’t have a date. How am I supposed to go to my own birthday ball dateless?”

“With the party I’m planning and the guest who will be trying to schmooze with you, you won’t even have time to entertain a date. And I’ll be busy on hostess duty so when I’m not with Marcel, you can dance with him.”

“Oh joy,” you said sarcastically turning on your heel. 

“And I’m sure one of my brothers will be loitering around somewhere. You can dance with one of them,” Rebekah said nonchalantly. Good thing she was busy looking at dresses or she would have seen your checks grow hot at the thought of dancing with Klaus. 

You walked over to another rack of dresses hoping to find the perfect one for your party. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw it. The perfect, show stopping, all eyes on you dress you had been searching for.

“Beks... I found it.”

Rebekah approached you and saw the dress you were holding so delicately in your hands. “You haven’t even tried it on yet.”

“I don’t need too. I already know.” You held the dress up to your body feeling the velvet material against your skin. “You think this is how brides feel when they find their wedding dress?”

Rebekah sighed, “I wouldn’t know.”

                                                            ~.~

After what felt like the longest week of your life, it was finally the night of your party. Rebekah made sure everything was taken care of, including having someone to do your hair and makeup. She even pulled out some old diamonds to go with your outfit. She mentioned something about a duchess owning them once, but your were to busy being blinded by the extravagant necklace to care. 

“Alright, the guest are starting to arrive,” Rebekah announced as she came into her room witch was your designated dressing room for the night. 

“Great! I’m ready,” you said standing up from your spot in front of the vanity. 

“Oh, you’re not going anywhere yet.”

“Why not,” you asked highly confused.

“You have to make an entrance! And you can’t do that with only ten people here,” Rebekah answered like you were out of your mind for even considering going down stairs.

You sat back down sighing. “So how long do I have to wait?”

“About thirty minutes.”

“What? But I’m ready now and-,” you began to say but Rebekah cut you off.

“No buts. You’ll thank me for it later when you see all those adoring people fawning over how incredible you look.”

“Fine,” you said crossing your arms over your chest. “Whatever.”

Thirty minutes later exactly, Rebekah returned and told you it was time. You left her room then waited for her to properly announce you before you made your way to the top of the stairs. She was right. It felt good to have everyone awing at how amazing you looked. You began to descend the stairs careful not to fall. Once you made it a few steps down, you saw Elijah ascend the stairs. Once he reached you, he held out his hand to escort you the rest of the way.

You smiled to the partygoers but spoke to the noble Mikaelson. “Thank you, Elijah. I was nervous I would tumble down these stairs then have to abruptly end the party out of embarrassment.”

Elijah kept his eyes forward as he lead you down the final steps. “You are more than welcome, Y/N. We couldn’t have the birthday girl enter her own party without a proper escort.”

You turned and smiled at him once you reached the bottom of the stairs. “We couldn’t,” you said then reached up to peck Elijah on the cheek. Out of the corner of your eye, you could have sworn you saw Klaus scowl at his older brother. 

The party was going smoothly. Rebekah did an incredible job and was a great hostess. Every passing minute, you worries about a potential Mikaleson threat ruining the night faded away. You danced with Marcel twice, and Elijah excused himself from Hayley to dance with you. Hope was having a wonderful time with her date, and as far as you could tell, Klaus hadn’t threatened the young man at all. Speaking of Klaus, you hadn’t seen much of him the whole night. 

The live band Rebekah hired switch to a new slow song and you quickly recognized the instrumental ballad they were playing. 

“I love this song,” you said softly to yourself. 

“Pardon me,” you heard a low accented voice say from behind you and you turned.  

“Would the birthday girl care to join me for a dance,” Klaus asked, his hand outstretched to you.

You tried to control you smile, but it grew wide and bright. “I’d love to,” you answered, then placed your hand in Klaus’s.

Klaus walked you to the dancefloor then slowly wrapped his hand around the small of your back and raised your join hands together.

“It’s about time you spoke to me tonight,” you said, being the first to break the silence. “I was beginning to think an enemy crashed my party and you were handling it.”

“I spent the past week threatening every supernatural creature within a 500 mile radius so that very thing would not happen,” Klaus said. 

Klaus was light on his feet. Elijah danced very formally. His steps were calculated. Marcel’s steps were more on the modern side. He danced to more upbeat songs with you. Saving the slow ones for Rebekah, so he could hold her close. Klaus was... smooth. You could tell he had the same classical dance style as his older brother, but he wasn’t as focused on making the next perfect step. He was graceful, but carefree. 

“Please forgive me for not finding you earlier to tell you how ravishing you look,” Klaus said making you blush and look away from his piercing eyes. Although it felt like Klaus was ghost for most of the night, his eyes didn’t leave you wherever you went in the room. From the moment you entered the party, his eyes were glued to you. He was jealous he didn’t get to help you down the stairs. Your navy dress fit you like a glove. The sparkles on the cape-like feature always hit the light just right so you couldn’t be missed. He wished you weren’t wearing gloves so he could feel the velvet soft skin of your hand against his.

“Thank you. It was all Rebekah honestly,” you said then looked back up into Klaus’s eyes, “she put all this together. I just picked out the dress.” 

“No,” Klaus said softly shaking his head at you. You tilted your head in question at his response. “Do not give my sister the credit. Yes, she may have helped with your hair and the makeup, but even without that, you would still be breathtaking.”

After that compliment you were sure you would have a permeant smile on your face for the rest of the night. You didn’t know how to respond to Klaus’s sweet words. Your hand that was placed on his shoulder gently went to the nape of his neck. You moved in closer to him so your chests were now pressed against each other. Klaus’s grip around your waist tightened. There was a warmth in his eyes that you hadn’t seen before. He began to lean down and your eyes fluttered shut.

“May I have everyone’s attention,” Rebekah’s voice boomed around the room without the need for a mic in her hands.

The bleak feeling of disappointment overtook you and Klaus as you pulled apart. Your hand glided down his arm, wanting to remain touching him in some way. 

“If the birthday girl would please come to the front so...”

                                                         ~.~

The party was basically over now. Just a few stragglers left. Everything went off without a hitch. You couldn’t have asked for a better night. Well, there was one thing you could ask for.

“Klaus?”

Klaus was alone on the balcony. Typical dramatic Mikaelson. 

He turned when you called his name. Your silhouette was perfect against the night sky. “Shouldn’t you be inside entertaining guest,” Klaus asked.

“I’m all party-ied out now,” you said then chuckled. A short breeze came by making you shiver as you reached Klaus near the railing.

“Here,” Klaus said, taking off his suit jacket and placing it over your shoulders. His hands lingered on you arms. “You should be inside.”

You tried to ignore the thud of you heart against your rib cage so you could speak. “You should be inside, too,” you pointed out, seeing as he was outside before you.

“Thousand year old hybrid here, love,” Klaus said smiling down at you. His hands left your arms and were now in his pant’s pockets.

“Fifty year old vampire here, Nik,” you stated being a smartass. 

Klaus shook his head as he laughed. “I think I may have you beat by a few hundred years.”

“Yeah, well, I should be fine out here as long as you’re here,” you said turning to the balcony, no longer looking at him.

There it was again. That warmth he felt when he was around you. It was like sunshine after a long and dark snowstorm. He felt light, at ease with you.

“You will be,” Klaus said. You turned your head to look at him and he was smirking at you. 

You felt nervous and giddy at the same time. Like a high schooler texting a new crush.  “What,” you asked smiling at him.

“You...,” Klaus said, his eyes trailed over your body. “You’re remarkable. I’ve done a countless amount of horrible things, but somehow, I’ve gotten the chance to know you... and you’re incredible.”

Your nerves were getting the best of you. Once again, you tried your best to control you smile, but you face was getting hot. “Klaus...,” you mutter, his name coming off your lips like a secret you wanted to keep for yourself. You nudged him lightly with your hand in a playful matter, but he grabbed it. His eyes serious on you.

He pulled you in closer. Your eyes searching his face for an answer to the thousands of questions that were going through your head. Suddenly, he let go of your hand and walked away. You were shocked to say the least. Blinking back utter confusion. 

Klaus walked up to the balcony doors and shut them. He turned around and faced you, a devilish grin on his face. “So we don’t get interrupted this time.”

Your shoulders relaxed as you smiled. Your sudden confusion melting away and turning to joy. “Good thinking.” 

Klaus took wide steps towards you, meeting you most of the way as you stepped forward and wrapped your arms around his shoulders once he reached you. His hands gripped your waist. His lips finally collided with yours. No interruptions. No worrying about what other people would think, or reasons why this could be a bad idea. Just you and him.

It was a good thing that the two of you were already dead, because the kiss was heart stopping. You removed your gloves earlier in the night, so your delicate hands were roaming through his hair as the kiss grew more intense. 

A flame ignited in Klaus’s chest from your touch. Your kiss was intoxicating and he knew he would never get enough. Why did he wait so long to do this again?

Klaus pulled back just as breathless as you. His hands rested respectfully on your lower back, while one of your hands was on his chest and the other in his hair. 

“Happy birthday, Y/N, ” Klaus said softly. 

In you post kiss daze you replied, “huh?”

“It’s after midnight,” Klaus explained. “You’re party was on Saturday, but now it’s Sunday. So it’s officially your birthday.”

A warm feeling grew in your tummy. This man already knew you so well. “Thank you,” you said gleaming up at him. You were already in deep with Klaus. There was no turning back now.

“You’re welcome, love,” Klaus replied. His hand now cupping your cheek as he gazed into your eyes. 

“Best. Birthday. Ever.”

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Revelation

Harry Potter Marauders Era-post Hogwarts 

Summary:  After James and Lily's deaths, you have to face secrets from your past. Secrets that caused a lot of pain are going to be brought back from the furthest corners of your heart. You have to learn to care for your nephew in the midst of a war that no one wants to deal with.

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader 

Rating: M- sensitive themes 

Shout out to @regulusheadcanons for some kick ass ideas

________

Home again...it should be a happy occasion but it wasn’t. You had received word from Sirius that James and Lily had been killed. Your older brother and sunny sister-in-law and best friend were gone and your sweet nephew was an orphan.

Y/n, I have Harry but I need your help. Remus and I need you and you’ll need your family in the coming days. Please come home.”

You had read the letter multiple times on the flight from the US back to the UK and felt even more guilty with each second. If you had just stayed home and didn’t run off to the state after your break up with Regulus; maybe James and Lily would still be alive.

Whether you were home or away if James and Lily were destined to die it would happen.

Remus’ words came back to you from the night before. You had spent an hour before bed last night crying to Remus over the phone. As usual, Remus was the one person that could calm you down. It could have been Regulus but he totally shot that to hell.

Regulus was still a sore subject for you...a secretive sore subject. The two of you had dated “in private” since the fifth year. You thought that the two of you were in love but Regulus wasn’t ready to “let his parents down.” Those were his words, not yours. You were under the impression that after graduation the two of you would begin a life together as Jams and Lily did. When Regulus ended the relationship because he knew that his parents wouldn’t support it. There was no way that Walburga and Orion Black would be happy with their heir dating a Potter that was in Gryffindor.

To deal with the pain of the breakup, you packed a bag and took off to America. You had left your brother and close friends in a state of confusion. They couldn’t wrap their minds around why you would just vanish in the middle of the night with literally no explanation. You played it off as some kind of “getting to know yourself” adventure and everyone seemed to believe it.

Now here you were going back home to rejoin the order that Regulus was apparently now a part of. You were trying to think of ways that you would be able to be in the same room with him and not act as if the two of you once had a passion-fueled relationship. Did you still have feelings for Regulus? Yes, you knew that there was no sense in denying it. You also knew the first time that you laid eyes on him all of those feelings would multiply...I’m screwed.

(1 hour later)

Regulus stood beside Sirius and Remus waiting for your plane to land. He had no idea what he was doing by tagging along with his brother but here he was.

You’re here because you love Y/n and are desperate to see her. You want to tell her that you were a fool for not manning up and telling mum and dad to bugger off.

Regulus thought as he tried to calm himself. The thoughts were truthful. He never should have let his family’s reputation affect his decision on how he handled the relationship that he valued the most...but he did. Now here Regulus stood a miserable lonely bastard with a brand on his left arm that he couldn’t get off.

Life sucks.

He had no family, no prospects of a successful future, and no lover. The life that Regulus knew so well had gone down the all-mighty porcelain shit hole in the course of one year. After finding out that her “heir” switched sides, Walburga banished Regulus from the family. Lucky for him, Regulus drained his Gringotts vault before his mother could leave him poor and penniless. Regulus could deal with the whole not having a successful future part. Working for the order should provide him some kind of satisfaction (eventually...maybe) The not having a lover part was the worst of all the three.

Regulus hated the way that he felt over the past year that you had been gone. He had attempted to date other girls but it always went south. There was something wrong with every girl that Regulus went out with.

This one talks too much.

This one has no personality.

This one bit me when giving me a blowjob.

None of them was the one girl that he wanted the most. Not one of the girls was the one that Regulus knew...the one that he loved.

“Hey grumpy, are you okay over there?”

Regulus looked up when Sirius spoke. Rolling his eyes, Regulus turned to face his brother with a sneer.

“He’s so charming.”

Sirius said with a smirk as he elbowed Remus in the side. Remus was used to the banter between Sirius and Regulus. It was mostly Sirius nagging Regulus and Regulus either rolling his eyes or calling Sirius a twat.

“There’s Y/n.”

Sirius quickly said before walking out into the aisle. He smiled as you finally met his gaze. You quickly threw your bag down before running to Sirius and jumping in his arms. What you didn’t see was Regulus watching the whole thing with a furiously jealous expression on his face.

Is there something that I’m missing? Of course, she likes Sirius. Why wouldn’t she? He is sooo good looking! He has such a charming attitude.

Regulus thought bitterly as Sirius held you a little longer than necessary. Were the two of you in some kind of relationship that Regulus didn’t know about and if so why hadn’t Sirius mentioned it? Regulus would go ape shit if the two of you were dating...you were his...used to be his.

What Regulus didn’t know was the hug was purely therapeutic and comforting for the both of you. Sirius needed you as much as you needed him (in a strictly platonic way). You were as good as a little sister to Sirius and seeing you after James and Lily’s death soothing. Sirius knew that you needed the support as much as he did.

Sirius didn’t want to think about the fact that Harry and yourself were the only Potter left now. His “new” family has quickly diminished before his eyes. Sirius had been so thrilled to finally have a family that loved him and now it was mostly gone. In Sirius’ mind, he had already made a personal pledge to make sure that nothing happened to you. He would make sure that both Harry and yourself were safe until the day that he died.

You let yourself slide out of Sirius’ arms as he smiled down at you. This was the first that either of you had smiled in a few days.

“Look at you. One year across the pond and you are still as adorable as when you left.”

Sirius said with a smile You rolled your eyes. This was typically Sirius Black. He always knew how to say something to make even the worst situations a bit better.

“And you always know what to say. It's good to see you...especially now.”

Sirius nodded, his face darkening. It was no secret to the two of you that the days ahead would be some of the darkest of your lives. Sirius pulled you into another hug. Pressing a kiss to the top of your head Sirius had to fight his own tears that were threatening to spill from his eyes.

“We are going to make it. We have to for Harry.”

You nodded in agreement. James and Lily made it clear that if anything should happen to them, they wanted Sirius and yourself to take care of Harry. The two of you, a couple or not, were the ones that would be the best fit to care for and love their son the most.

“We’ve got this.”

You said in agreement. Both Sirius and yourself sucked at making your true feelings known. It would be easier to say that the two of you were devastated and didn’t know how life would ever go back to normal...but you wouldn't...you couldn’t.

Sirius finally let you go before wrapping an arm around your waist.

“I have a surprise for you. I dragged Remus along with my grumpy brother. Don’t mind him, he just hates everyone equally.”

The moment that you looked up and locked eyes with Regulus, your mouth dropped. There he stood...he was so close that you could run to him.

He hurt you. He doesn’t deserve a moment of your time. Kick him in the shins if he tries anything.

The sassy voice in your head picked up as your brain went into over-protection mode. As much as you wanted to hug Regulus, you weren't. You would admire him from afar.

“Hello, Regulus.”

He nodded, not saying anything. Regulus had a feeling that if he spoke, feelings that he didn’t want Sirius or Remus to know would spill out. He would look like a fool in the middle of the airport.

Regulus wanted nothing more than to tell you that he had changed. He wasn’t the man that he used to be. If you would just give him a chance, he could prove it...or was he too late. Had Sirius stolen you from him for good? Would Regulus be able to watch the two of you as a couple? Hell no! Regulus would rather be killed or just die in some tragic way than watch you be his brother’s lover.

Sometimes dead is better.

Before Regulus was able to make a comment, Remus stepped in and pulled you into a hug. Regulus put his head down with an insolent frown. What he didn’t see was Sirius watching him with a suspicious frown. Why did Regulus suddenly look like a jealous lover?

Arriving back to Sirius’ house, you were thrilled to automatically be greeted by Marlene and Dorcas. Both of your friends took turns hugging you and cradling you like a baby.

“You look so pretty! Dorcas, doesn’t she look pretty?”

Marlene squealed. Dorcas nodded.

“Of course, she looks pretty. We’ve missed your face.”

“Um, you two are kind of hurting my face.”

You squeaked. Both Dorcas and Marlene backed away as Sirius stepped into the room with Harry in his arms. Your happy smile faded as you laid your eyes on your nephew that looked so much like his father.

Sirius smiled as he placed the baby boy in your arms.

“Harry, say hello to your aunty Y/n. She’s a doll, huh?”

Sirius smirked as he noticed Regulus step into the room. The younger brother immediately locked his eyes on you.

Crap….

He was dreading the moment that you met your nephew for the first time. Regulus dreaded seeing your tears and here you were cuddling the baby with tears in your eyes. He hated it even more that he couldn’t comfort you like he used to. When something was bothering you before, Regulus took care of it. He knew how to make everything better. Whether it be simply cuddling you, kicking someone’s ass in “secret”, or physical comfort...Regulus did it.

“Uh oh, I think someone needs a change.”

You stated, pulling Regulus from his thoughts. Sirius pointed to the little bedroom off of the kitchen.

“That’s his room. Feel free to do whatever you need to. I normally put him down for a nap about this time.”

You walked from the room with a smile leaving Sirius and Regulus alone in the kitchen.

The moment that you were gone, Regulus sat down at the table and reached for the newspaper in front of him. Sirius, meanwhile, decided to ask questions about his suspicions.

“So, Reg, I have a curious question.”

Regulus didn’t look up from the newspaper. His dark eyes were focused on reading. The less that he had to deal with his brother the better off he was. He was too busy trying to control his emotions over you and didn’t have the strength or patience to deal with Sirius and his nonsense.

“The answer is yellow and you are not a woman.”

Regulus replied with a small smirk. Sirius gave his brother an annoyed sneer.

“I’m aware of that fact and I have no idea what yellow has to do with anything. My question is what happened between Y/n and yourself?”

Regulus looked up, obviously surprised.

“Excuse me?”

Sirius glanced over his shoulder to make sure that you weren’t listening.

“I saw how the two of you look at each other.”

Regulus resumed his “cool as a cucumber” attitude. Turning the page of the newspaper, he went back to reading.

“I should ask you the same question.”

It was Sirius’ turn to look confused.

“Huh?”

Regulus snorted.

“The way that you two go gaga over each other. It's disgusting. I wish James would come back from the dead to kick your ass.”

Sirius blinked. The way that the two of you acted at the airport was typical “Sirius and Y/n” behavior. Anyone that knew the two of you would agree to that. It was playful fun between friends. Sirius didn’t look at you like…

Oh my god, Regulus is hot for Y/n!

Sirius’ mouth dropped at the thought. He quickly pointed at his little brother.

“You like her! Have you two...done dirty things?”

Regulus looked up. He placed his elbows on the table to place his chin on his hands.

“To answer your question, yes we have done dirty things. If you think that you are going to be half the lover to her that I was, you are sadly mistaken. I bet she hasn’t called you daddy before.”

The words left Regulus’ mouth before he could really think about what he said. Normally, Regulus typically was very calculating with what he said. This comment, however, just came out leaving Regulus feeling like a jealous 13-year-old girl who was deciding who could sit with him at lunch and who couldn’t.

“Huh?”

Sirius questioned. Regulus didn’t blink or move.

“What?”

Regulus replied, with a sneaky smirk. Sirius, meanwhile, stood with his mouth wide open as he realized exactly what his brother said. Regulus didn’t make any facial expression as Sirius scratched his head. How long had you been sleeping with Regulus? When did this happen and where was Sirius? How did he not pick up on this and you called Regulus “daddy.”

Sirius would never think about his little brother in that particular context. He still saw Regulus as his innocent quiet brother who he assumed was still a virgin but obviously wasn’t (and he was apparently good at doing the “deed.”)

Regulus-fucking-Black is a kinky dude... it's always the quiet ones.

Sirius thought before speaking gibberish when he tried to question his brother on when and where this all started and how did he miss the memo?

“Y-wh-she-where…”

Regulus smirked before going back to his newspaper leaving his brother to question everything about a world that he thought he knew so well. He only looked up again when you stepped into the room with Remus behind you. The two of you were talking quietly and stopped at Sirius’ strange actions.

“Sirius, what’s wrong?”

Remus questioned as you looked between both brothers. Sirius motioned to Regulus then to you and uttered a strange slew of words that were mixed together so much that no one could understand. Had you not been so confused, you would have found Sirius’ over the top dramatic motions to Remus amusing. He clearly expected Remus to understand what he was talking about but Remus just blinked and scratched his head.

“Uh-huh.”

Remus politely replied and decided that he was not going to try to decipher what Sirius was freaking out for the moment. Once Sirius got himself together, Remus was sure that he would hear about whatever it was.

Regulus stood up with a pleased smile on his face.

“My work here is done.”

You had a feeling on what happened. Sirius was just let in on the “big secret” and was having the reaction that you expected. If James was still alive he would either be doing the same thing or he would have Regulus in a headlock...it would be a real toss-up. Hopefully, somewhere in heaven, your brother wasn’t giving Lily too hard of a time.

Waiting a moment longer, you turned and followed Regulus outside onto the front step. He was in the middle of lighting a cigarette when you stepped out with no coat on. Rolling his eyes, he didn’t want to let his attention linger too long but couldn’t help it.

“Go back inside. It's cold out here.”

Regulus commented. He felt bad that the first thing that he said to you was an order. The last thing that he wanted was for you to get ill. You crossed your arms over your chest as the cold autumn air surrounded you.

“So the first words that you say to me is an order. Is that how it's going to be?”

You questioned as Regulus took a drag on the cigarette before turning back to you. He groaned before tossing the half-smoked cigarette into the waiting ashtray. Pulling his coat off he gently wrapped it around your shoulders.

You were clearly surprised by his action. Surprised and heartbroken was the exact feelings that you had going through you. The coat smelled just like Regulus always had from the time that you had gotten to know him. That comforting scent that always made your overly anxious nerves relax anytime that he was near you.

“Um...sorry. Hello, sorry that I’m an ass.”

Regulus offered, clearly confused as to what you wanted from him. You sighed.

“You told Sirius about our relationship didn’t you?”

Regulus shook his head.

“Not exactly. He asked if we did dirty things and I simply said that I bet you haven’t called him daddy before.”

All of the thoughts came to a screeching halt in your mind. Regulus had actually said that to Sirius and now Sirius knew! You blushed at the realization that you would have to explain this to Sirius soon. There was also the annoyance that Regulus didn’t seem to mind letting his brother in on the secret but he couldn't open his mouth to his parents. Maybe you were right all along? Perhaps the relationship was just about the sex to Regulus and when he said “I love you” he didn’t really mean it.

“You’re comfortable telling Sirius what we do in the bedroom but you don’t have the balls to tell your parents anything...lovely.”

Regulus’ face was unreadable for a moment.

“I don’t talk to my parents anymore. You would have known that if you hadn’t run off to America.”

“You broke up with me. I had nothing to stay for. As far as I knew, you were stuck on being a death eater and wanted nothing more to do with me. Did you honestly think that I was going to wait around for you to walk all over me again? I’m not dirt under your shoe just because I am not some member of some super elite club of pureblood morons.”

Regulus didn’t expect the venom to ooze out of your mouth the way that it did. Now here he stood looking at you with an annoyed expression.

“It looks like you’ve moved on just fine with my brother.”

You laughed at that comment...hard.

“Sirius and I? Wow, you must really be fucked in the head if you think that I would date someone who is like another brother to me.”

“I'm fucked in the head? Did you really say that?”

Regulus snapped. You nodded.

“Yep. Sure did. You know what, maybe I should date Sirius. At least, he was there for me. He wanted to make sure that I was okay and even offered to come to America to get me. You didn’t. In this whole year that we have been broken up, how many times have you tried to contact me? I’ll answer that...none. All that I have to say to you is, Regulus Black you aren’t getting your coat back.”

You turned on your head storming in the house and slamming the door behind you. Regulus stood looking at the place that you once stood with an annoyed frown.

“Fuck!

________

@amelie-black @regulusheadcanons @truly-insatiable @fandomsxxregulus @realgaytrash @quuenofblacks @lucasfilms77 @fific7 @hazncalsgal @teletubiswszpilkach @exhsle @acciosiriusblack @whymyparentscheckmyphone @criminalyetminimal @bennyberry @mimisparkle12 @jessyballet @knreidy1 @rubyroscoe1 @spiderxalmighty @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @fandom-trash-worth-it @summer-novak @hankypranky @emiwrites3reads @shaylybaby2032 @li0nh34rt @tas898 @stuckinsaudi1 @untoldshortsofthefandoms @sprnaturallover @deanwherescas @wontlookaway @shitfaceddaniel @mycuddlycorner @marichromatic

[pennylanewrites]

hey, I was wondering what are your fav ships in anime? like your top 5? And why?

Hey, thank you for this question!! I didn’t really put them in order bc I love all of them but here we go ig!

contains spoilers!

~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~

1. LEVIHAN (Levi x Hange)

their dynamics???oh my! I just love their interactions and even though they’re not canon confirmed I feel like there’s a subtle romance between them!

2. Mafuyama (Mafuyu x Ritsuka)

DO NOT GET ME STARTED ugh just how Mafuyu came in Ritsuka’s life and changed it so much for the better and how Ritsuka helped his bf SO much with dealing with Yuki’s death and going forward OH LAWD they warm my heart so much

3. Saiki x Aiura (I think their ship name is Mikosai?)

Again another ship whose dynamics are just AMAZING. antisocial boyfriend that doesn’t talk about his feelings and social butterfly girlfriend that just enjoys teasing the shit out of him? Sign me the fuck up! And the fact that it’s canon that they’re soulmates? Like at first I thought of them as strictly platonic soulmates, but then I saw some good fan art and couldn’t resist anymore lol

4. Yumihisu (Ymir x Historia)

ABWKSBSHAUWHAH every time Ymir told Historia ‘marry me after this, Krista’ HELP. I feel like they complete each other in the best ways possible and I love them so so so so much ugh why did Ymir have to die bruh:( (plus I kin Ymir and I have the hugest crush on Hisu sooooo)

5. Ryuji x Ami (from Toradora)

I know a lot of people have said Toradora is boring, but I honestly love a good cliche and Toradora will always have a special place in my heart bc it was the first romance anime I watched. Anyway, here’s some explanation. Ami obviously likes Ryuji after a while of knowing him. Yes, she appears to be a total bitch, but she decides to change FOR him and show her true self:( My favorite moment has to be at the beach episode, when they were lighting fireworks and Ryuji told Ami something along the lines of ‘I’m glad I’m here with you’ or ‘it wouldn’t be fun without you’ SOMETHING LIKE THAT. My heart aches for Ami and Minori, but I think Ami is the best match for Ryuji, unlike Taiga (who I don’t like bc she was borderline abusive to him and their relationship was more of a brother-sister bond than anything)

[the-demelza-robins]

never understood you before (but i do now) part vi

guess who’s back!! and with the final chapter!! sorry for the wait, and hope you enjoy!

you can also read this on ao3

THANKSGIVING BREAK PASSES in a flurry of turkey, potatoes, and disapproving glances (courtesy of Petunia). When it finally comes to an end, standing next to her parents and waving halfheartedly at Vernon’s car as it backs out of the driveway, all Lily feels is relief.

The moment is short lived. “Lily, dishes,” Laurel says, more of a statement than a question. Lily sighs and walks back into the kitchen. She’s about ten minutes into the seemingly endless pile of plates and tupperware before her mother joins her.

“What did you think of Vernon?” Laurel asks, leaning against the kitchen doorframe. Lily pauses, faucet still running. She calculates. Honesty is not the solution here, but neither is an outright lie.

She settles on saying “I think they’re a good match” while sponging the pan she’s washing a little too aggressively.

Laurel hums. “Petunia’s always been more — conscientious of the future. It’s one of my favorite things about her. She plans and she plans and she plans.”

She’s planning with Vernon, Lily translates. Her future is safe with Vernon.

“I think there are some things you can’t plan,” Laurel continues, smiling slightly. “Your father and I… never in my wildest dreams would I have predicted marrying him. I just — I just worry for Petunia, that she won’t be able to experience that.”

Silence, except for the faucet.

Lily clears her throat. She wishes she could respond I worry for Petunia, too, but the fact is that she and Petunia have never been close, not since they were children, not since — well, not since Severus. In the dim recesses of her mind, Lily can scrounge up some happy memories of her sister — shared Halloween costumes, Petunia’s protective stance on the playground — but they’re both rare and fleeting. Petunia is Petunia, and Lily is Lily, and the former will forever disapprove of the latter in the way that only sisters can. She can’t vocalize this truth, though — even if her mother already knows. Instead: “I think Petunia doesn’t want anything to be unpredictable. I think she’d hate falling in love with someone unexpected.”

Laurel nods, standing up a little straighter. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“You’ve been branching out this year. I know you don’t tell me everything, but the Parents’ Association moms are very chatty. I never would have imagined you with Roger Davies, that’s all. I was surprised.”

Lily knows that she’s started to blush, but she can’t stop. She and her mother never talk about these things. “I really don’t think I’m in love with Roger, if that’s what you’re getting at, Mom,” she says, thinking of the last time she really spoke with him. The last yearbook meeting, maybe? Anything they’d had had fizzled out after that first date, after she’d somewhat clumsily executed a slow fade. “I haven’t even spoken to him recently.”

“Well, I guess I’m behind the times. Want to catch me up? Anything going on lately?”

“No,” she says, more forcefully. “Nothing.” Inexplicably, Lily pictures James, sitting on the kitchen counter just days ago. She pushes the thought down — she must have had too much wine at dinner, to be randomly thinking about him like this.

“Just checking,” Laurel says, a glint in her eye that Lily can’t interpret and feels vaguely threatened by. “I’m going to bed. See you tomorrow morning.”

“Love you,” Lily calls automatically, already back to the soapy water, her mother’s words echoing in her head. You’ve been branching out lately. Had she, really? Yes, she’d spoken to Roger. Become friends with James. She supposed she had more people to say hello to in the halls now, but that was really just because of her position as head of the yearbook. The fact was, she still felt like the same old Lily, truly open to only a few people, closed off to the rest of the world behind a veil of awkwardness and, at times, imposter syndrome. Her thoughts pull towards James again: how comfortable she feels in his presence, how easy it is to do away with the layers of caution that seem to smother her other social interactions. She shakes her head, turns the water off, examines the now clean kitchen. No more thinking of James Potter, she tells herself firmly. The thought echoes through her head as she gets ready for bed, self defeating by nature.

***   Marlene comes back from Thanksgiving break with a new friendship. She and Remus, she explains, had been volunteering at the same soup kitchen over break. Long hours ladling soup and tearing off bread had created (by Marlene’s telling) an unbreakable bond. “All of this is to say,” she says now as she swerves past a mailbox, Lily hanging on for dear life in the passenger seat of her friend’s car, “that Remus invited me over to watch a movie at James’s on Friday. It’s so funny how they — all four of them, you know — just invite people over to each other’s houses. Squad goals? Anyway, he said the invite was for me, you, whoever else. Dorcas has those damned violin recitals, but hopefully we’ll be able to spring her free — watch it! —” (a pigeon had dared hop into the road, and flew away hastily) “— and Alice and James and Sirius and Peter too.”

“Oh,” Lily says.

Marlene shoots her a look. “I thought it was a wonderful idea, seeing as you've started to become completely platonic, innocent friends with James Potter —”

“— every day, I regret telling you about Halloween more and more —”

“— and there’s nothing like a movie on a Friday night to solidify a friendship, is there, Lily?” Marlene smirks, and Lily can do nothing but silently fume as they pull into the high school parking lot. “Come on. You know it’ll be a good time.”

“I do, and I hate you for it,” Lily grumbles, getting out of the car. “And, for the last time, there’s nothing going on with James. Stop smirking.”

“Speak of the devil,” her friend says in lieu of a response, motioning to where James is approaching them from across the parking lot. For a second, all Lily can do is stare. He looks tanner, she thinks, briefly, before dismissing the thought; he didn’t even travel over the break. She must be seeing things.

He stops in front of them, holding onto his backpack straps and squinting against the sun. “Just the girls I was hoping to run into.”

“Oh?” Lily asks, tossing her hair over her shoulder and glancing up at him before she loses the nerve. Just James. Just a slightly tanner James. Nothing you haven’t seen before.

“For the movie on Friday: Peter and I want to watch Jaws and Sirius and Remus want to watch Love, Actually. Thoughts?”

Lily finds herself sputtering, “But — I barely just agreed to go, how did you —”

Marlene’s dangerously close to smirking again. “I may or may not have told James you’d be a sure thing,” she says, not noticing (or not caring) about James’s hair, or his tan, or the way his biceps flexed slightly when he ran a hand through his hair. How could someone not care about those things? “Have a nice break, Potter?”

“Perfectly fine. Did you like the flowers, Lily?”

Marlene shoots her an incredulous look, and Lily doesn’t know who she wants to murder first. “My mom really appreciated them. Tell your mom she said thanks.”

He pouts. It makes his mouth look — good. Shut up. She knows what it’s like to kiss him. Shut up. To feel his lips on her skin, on her neck, against her pulse point. Shut up.

“— game on Friday,” James is saying, and Lily’s not listening, but it doesn’t matter, because now he’s talking to Marlene. Lily trails behind them, watching as her fellow students move aside to let him pass through the parking lot, through the school entrance, through locker-lined hallways.

“— coming, Evans?” he asks, snapping her out of her stupor. They’re standing outside what she belatedly recognizes to be the math classroom, Marlene long gone.

She blinks once, twice. He raps her temple gently, that teasing glint in his eye again. “Lily?”

She’s so stunned by the fact that he’s touching her — granted, his knuckles are touching the side of her head, not a particularly romantic gesture — that for a second, she can only stand there, scrambling for some excuse, something to fill the suddenly heavy air between them.

Before she can come up with a suitable response, Gretchen Prewett shoulders between them to step into the classroom, breaking their contact and bumping into Lily a harder than strictly necessary. And that’s when Lily remembers — James and Gretchen. Gretchen and James. Gretchen with her curly blonde hair, her brown eyes, and her kindness, her infallible goodness, ever since kindergarten when she offered Lily a turn on the swings — Gretchen ensconced in James’s embrace after the soccer game, Gretchen whispering in his ear at the Halloween party, Gretchen with her arms around his waist at that one house party at the start of the year….

“Lily?” James repeats, this time with more concern. “You okay?”

She blinks again, suddenly unable to make eye contact. “Um, yeah.”

“Thought I lost you for a second there,” he says. “Shall we?”

He steps through the classroom door, and all Lily can do is follow.

***

That night, Lily sits on her bed, calculus notes spread around her, and texts the group chat.

i don’t think i can do this movie night thing on Friday

She exhales, the lie settling in her brain. She adds: something came up

Marlene responds almost immediately.

Marlene: was that something the realization that ur so desperately attracted to james samuel potter, you can’t be in the same room without wanting a repeat performance of halloween night?

Dorcas: i don’t think james’s middle name is samuel

Marlene: semantics

Dorcas: you don’t have to go lily

Marlene: oh yes you do

Lily: his middle name is Fleamont after his dad

Marlene: …

Marlene: why would you ever know that if you didn’t want to submit to the sexual tension that seems to follow you both EVERYWHERE

Lily: i’m a normal person who pays attention to things, that’s how i know his middle name!!!

Lily: and we do NOT have sexual tension

Marlene: pish

Marlene: i saw the way you were looking at him in the parking lot today

Marlene: you were feasting ur eyes

Alice: i wasn’t there but i believe marlene

Marlene: it’s okay tho because he was checking you out too

Lily’s blushing uncontrollably now. She’s always loved Marlene’s relentless determination, her stubbornness; however, it’s almost never been turned on her. What makes her friend’s insistence all the more infuriating is the fact that she’s right. Lily is plagued by flashbacks to Halloween night whenever she’s close to James. She can’t help, really, but admire how smooth his jawline is, or the shape of his collarbone, or the curve of his biceps, which sometimes show, depending on what shirt he’s wearing —

Even his once-annoying habit of constantly messing with his hair has grown on her, if only because she knows what it feels like to run her fingers through it, and wants desperately to repeat the experience.

Lily: okay even if i were a smidgen attracted to him it doesn’t matter because i completely forgot that he had a thing with gretchen

Alice: omg gretchen

Marlene: i thought they were just hooking up???

Lily: idk but she was really aggressive to me today right after i spoke to him

Marlene: huh i didn’t think she had it in her

Alice: go gretchen honestly

Alice: it’s about time she developed some backbone

Dorcas: yeah not with lily tho???

Lily: i don’t want to be a homewrecker

Marlene: you are literally so dramatic

Marlene: just ask James where he’s at with Gretchen

Marlene: on Friday.

Marlene: when you’ll be at the movie night, because you’re coming with us, because i’m picking you up at seven

Marlene: :)

***

At 7:05 on Friday night, Marlene pulls into Lily’s driveway.

“Surprisingly punctual,” Lily comments as she slides into the passenger’s seat, the familiar hum of the engine calming her nerves slightly. There’s a bitter chill to the air, to be expected in early December, and she wraps her coat around herself more tightly.

Marlene shrugs. “I do what I can.”

Then she floors it. All too soon, Lily finds herself standing in front of James’s door, hand hovering over the doorbell. “Is this really —”

Marlene rolls her eyes and jams her finger against the bell. “Yes. It’s really necessary. Talk to him and then ride off into the sunset together.”

Just then, the door swings open, and there he is: hair wet from a post-game shower, wearing a shirt that brings out the green in his eyes — eyes that flick up and down, taking her in, so quickly she almost could’ve missed it.

“Lily, you look great,” he says, then clears his throat. “Um, we’re downstairs. Movie’s about to start.” For the first time, he seems to notice the girl standing beside her. “Hi, Marlene.”

Marlene whistles lowly as they head downstairs, and Lily prods her with her elbow, cognizant of the fact that her cheeks are turning more and more red. She tries to take her mind off of James by focusing on her surroundings; she hasn’t been in his house since elementary school, when it was common procedure to invite the whole class to every birthday party. It’s nice — that’s no surprise, considering his family’s considerable wealth — and looks fairly lived in. As she and Marlene step into the basement, fully finished with a giant television and an assortment of comfy chairs and couches, Lily begins to regain her composure.

Sirius and Remus are cuddled up on one end of the couch, with Alice and Dorcas sitting on the floor in front of them, flipping back and forth between Jaws and Love, Actually. Marlene immediately walks over to Remus, and Lily trails behind, dismayed to hear that the two have already begun talking about a class that she doesn’t share. She turns towards Alice and Dorcas, but is stopped by the prickle at the edge of her vision — some subconscious mechanism alerting her to the fact that she’s being watched. Sure enough, Sirius Black is staring at her, eyebrows raised. The almost challenging expression is new to Lily; the Sirius she’s always known has been laid back, easygoing.

That is, before she accused him of trying to take advantage of her best friend on Halloween night. She cringes internally at the memory; she won’t apologize for worrying about her friend, but perhaps she had jumped to conclusions a bit too quickly. She clears her throat and veers towards him, steeling herself.

“Lily.” Sirius inclines his head ever so slightly, watching as she perches awkwardly on the couch’s arm.

“Sirius. I, um, probably should apologize for Halloween night.”

“What part?” he says, and something’s wrong, here, she thinks. “The part when you accused me of taking advantage of Marlene, or the part when you stuck your tongue down my best friend’s throat, then abandoned him?”

She’s so floored she almost falls off the couch. He’s speaking quietly, tone monotone, and if she hadn’t known better, she would’ve thought he was bored by the whole thing. But his gaze hasn’t moved from her face, and she realizes for the first time that Sirius Black, while angry, is worthy of fear.

“I — well — I’m sorry for assuming your intentions with Marlene. I didn’t know you —” she looks towards Remus, still chatting away obliviously with her friend “— I didn’t know you were in a relationship, and I overreacted. As for the James stuff, I — I really don’t know what to say. I thought he just wanted to be friends.”

“Yes, when Remus kissed me for the first time, my first thought was, ‘Oh, I bet he just wants to be friends,’” Sirius mutters acridly, but his expression has softened slightly, and Lily allows herself to relax, just a little bit. “Jesus Christ. This is worse than I thought.” “What is worse?” Lily asks, feeling strangely defensive. “James and I —”

“James has had a crush on you since seventh grade, Lily,” Sirius all but hisses. “It’s so incredibly obvious, I never even considered you didn’t know. I thought you were —”

“Some manipulative bitch stringing him along?” Lily finishes, arching an eyebrow at him, hoping she can disguise the shock reverberating through her. Since seventh grade.

“You’re kind of scary, Lily Evans,” Sirius says drily. “And sharp. Emotionally aware or some shit. It’s intimidating. The poor fool was just happy to have time with you, even if you thought that him fucking kissing you was an expression of platonic friendship — ”

“That’s not — I’m not — I — he was with Gretchen!”

Sirius scoffs. “I can’t explain all his choices. But they were never together, never officially. Gretchen was hooking up with Michael Goldstein at the same time. She can get kind of territorial. I told him not to get mixed up in it, but he was so hung up on — well.” He pauses. “I’ve said too much.” His tone is not apologetic or regretful in the slightest; in fact, Lily can see the beginnings of a smirk on his face. She doesn’t focus on it for too long, though; there’s too much to process. For the first time, the possibility of James — of really being with him, of holding his hand, of FaceTiming with him late into the night, of walking down the hallways together — cements in her head. Her head swims, imagining the potential of it all. “Where’s James?”

“Getting drinks upstairs,” Sirius says, eying her with suspicion. “Why?” “I think he and I need to have a talk.”

***

Lily finds James in the kitchen on the main floor, trying and failing to carry seven beer cans at the same time. When he sees her, they come crashing to the floor, and before she knows what she’s doing, she’s helping him pick them up, avoiding eye contact.

“What are you doing up here? Is something wrong?” James asks once the cans have been dealt with.

She leans against the kitchen island, wiping her palms on the sides of her jeans. His gaze follows the motion before he blinks and makes eye contact again, clearing his throat. Waiting for her to speak.

So she does: “Nothing’s wrong. I just — I wanted to ask you about someone.”

He cocks an eyebrow. “Really? Who? Sorry. Whom.”

Lily can’t help but roll her eyes, his impeccable grammar relaxing her nerves. “Whom? Really, James?”

He scoffs and shakes his head, but there’s no real heat to it. “Only the best for my yearbook editor.” He’s leaning against the wall opposite her, hands in his pockets. When he looks back at her, the air feels like honey: thick and slow-moving, sweet. She’s never had someone look at her like that before. Her heart speeds up. Get back on track, Lily.

“Right. Uh, anyway. I was thinking about Halloween —”

There it is, again. That look. Followed by a brief glance at her mouth — he’s quick, but she’s attuned to his every movement, now — before his eyes flick back up to her face. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. And I realized that I completely forgot about Gretchen.”

James breaks eye contact. “What about her?”

One deep breath, then two. “Well. Were you seeing her? Was I — helping you cheat, or —”

“God, no,” he says. “Lily, I would never — we weren’t exclusive, or together, and she was mostly using me to make Michael Goldstein jealous, anyway.”

“Oh.”

He clears his throat again, runs a hand through his hair. It’s dry, now, and looks impossibly soft. Lily’s fingers clench automatically.

“Well,” she says, heart pounding. She senses she’s very close to something, something big; it’s like she’s standing on the edge of a cliff, crystal-clear water below, and she’s terrified of how deep she might fall. No matter that jumping off that cliff is what she’s been wanting to do for months now. No matter that jumping off that cliff might simply mean closing the two feet of separation between her and the boy she so desperately wants. “See you downstairs, then.”

***

Lily bolts.

There’s no other word for it; she walks out of the kitchen as fast as she can, pretending not to hear James calling her name. She knows she’s a coward. She knows that if she’d crossed that final threshold, if she’d turned back around, if she’d stayed, her life might look very different. But she can’t do it.

The fact of the matter is, Lily Evans has been Lily Evans, undesirable, longer than she has been Lily Evans, as-crushed-on-by-James-Potter-since-the-fucking-seventh-grade. She needs to let the notion sink under her skin. She’s out of first moves; she’s out of soul-searing confidence. She asked about Gretchen. It was a baby step. Now she can go downstairs and watch the fucking movie, and bear the brunt of Marlene’s disappointment, and fall asleep fantasizing about James’s lips and hands and body instead of experiencing the real thing. It’s fine. It’s what she’s used to doing, and so far, she’s done perfectly well.

It’s not that she doesn’t like James; no, the opposite holds true. She very much likes James, to an extent that is unfamiliar and sticky and all too attainable. James Potter — the disco ball that’s sharp around the edges, except lately it seems as if they’ve both been childproofing the jagged parts, making them soft and round and welcoming. She doesn’t know how this works, how to navigate a minefield that’s been disarmed and paved over.

Besides, she thinks as she begins to walk down the stairs to the basement, how is she supposed to hold up to the idealized version of herself that must have been growing, festering, in James’s head for the past five years? Lily, who’s only kissed three people, and never done more; Lily, who doesn’t know how to be in a relationship, especially one with one of the school’s most visible students; Lily, who, despite all her newfound confidence, still can’t wrap her head around the idea that James would like her. Would want her. Would —

“Lily?”

Instinctively, her head snaps towards the voice’s source. It’s James, of course it is. He stands at the top of the stairs, the soft glow of the overhead light making him look practically angelic. She nods at him.

“Can I join you?”

“Yes.”

He walks until he’s standing on a step two feet away from her. The trek down to the basement involves two flights of stairs, with a landing in between; on the first staircase, therefore, she and James are hidden from the basement’s occupants, from outside influence, from the world.

“What is it?” she asks, going for unbothered and confident and failing miserably. She can’t meet his eyes.

“I was just wondering — now that we’ve, um, cleared up the Gretchen thing — well, the thing is,” he says, running a hand through his hair and smiling apologetically, “I’m, um, rambling. Sorry. Um, what I’m trying to say is that I’ve really enjoyed being your friend over the past few months. But — and it’s only fair you should know — I’ve really, really liked you for the past few years. God, that makes me sound creepy. It’s not that, I swear. I just — you’re so — so poised and kind and sharp. I always, well, I always thought you were too mature for me, too smart. You — you really don’t suffer fools, Lily, and I am one, but, well, in spite of that — in spite of everything — will you go out with me?”

She looks up at him, eyes wide, heart beating wildly. “You are a fool, James,” she whispers, words almost catching in her throat, because there it is. He’s just given the final confirmation, the truth: that he, James Potter, likes her. Wants her. Wants to be with her. She can’t stop — fuck, she keeps remembering Halloween. His hands on her skin. “I — you’re a complete fool, and you’re also ridiculously charming and intelligent and social in a way I can’t fathom, and I respect you. I really do.”

James’s face falls. “Right. Well, I’m glad you respect me, and I’ll just — I’ll just go now, I guess —”

“I don’t want you to go,” she bursts out. This conversation is getting out of her control (when had it ever been in her control?), the words slipping away from her. You can’t do first moves, grand proclamations, the voice in her head whispers snidely, but she ignores it. “I want you to stay. I respect you, and I like you, and I want to be with you. See?”

It’s his turn to look gobsmacked. “Oh. As friends, or —”

She pounces on him. There’s no other word for it, not really; she reaches the staircase step below his, and then she guides his mouth down to hers, hands around the back of his neck, back arching under his. If she stands on her tiptoes she can make the angle better, and… there. Something like a sigh falls from James’s mouth. His hands wind through her hair, glasses bumping slightly against her forehead. It’s not a perfect kiss. But it does accomplish the most important thing, for James Potter, jagged around the edges, and Lily Evans, sharp to the touch, have changed.

Both are now soft, malleable, in each others’ arms.

[agentsoftie]

morning meetings

summary: on vacation spencer rekindles an old love which brought him greater joy then he remembered

authors note: wow, this is my first fic in a while. hopefully it’s good. but yeah. i got this idea today too so i’m so sorry if it’s hella cheesy. but yeah

warnings: none! pure fluff

word count & pairing: spencer r & fem reader : 1.9k

remember to like and reblog!

The wind was blowing exactly 15mph and Spencer Reid had just arrived in Seattle. His job, as a profiler, took him all across the US. And his mind took him everywhere else. Although Seattle was different, Seattle was special. See, when his mother and father were still together, they took him here every summer. Because every summer they would come here, just to eat at Marge’s Hideout.

Today although, he wasn’t there because of his job. He was there on vacation. Or any form of that for him.

After checking out of his hotel and going for a walk on the pier, there was only one thing on his mind, coffee. Coffee from Marge’s.

So he picked up biked and went along the trail. Not using GPS, not since he had an eidetic memory, but since he knew the path by heart. Every good memory he’s had in his childhood always took place here, in Seattle. More specifically, on Louise’s Trail that goes straight through the town, and leading right to Marge’s Hideout. Although full of cobblestones and vines, it truly felt like you were at peace. At least for him, it did.

He knew he was coming to a stop on his wobbling journey as soon as he smelt croissants and pancakes. Stumbling and tipping over on his bike as he tried to get off, someone opened the door. And in through the door, he heard a laugh. The same laugh he had heard almost every day in his early 20’s. It couldn’t be, could it.

Quickly floundering to the door while trying not to trip over his own shoes, he kept thinking to himself. Or more though, all the memories washed over him. All of the ridiculous, joyful, and heartbreaking moments washed over him.

Finally getting inside, he heard it again. The same laugh. The same laugh he had heard all those years back. “Y/N?” He spoke causing a woman with rich brown hair to turn around.

“Spence,” she breathed out.

They both looked at each other until she finally broke the silence.

“Hi.”

He went over to her seat. Trying to maintain an appropriate distance you would have with a stranger. Although she wasn’t a stranger. She was his last love. And his only love.

Y/N and Spencer had dated for 4 years. It was her first day of orientation when she met Spencer though. He was assisting the class she was in, and she couldn’t help herself but to ogle at his clumsiness and awkwardness. So, she asked him out for coffee, strictly platonic though.

Of course, at first, he was quite conflicted to take up her offer, but he did anyway. Because she seemed nice, and he would never not take up an offer if it involved coffee. So they went there. And then again. And again. And again, and again, and again, and again, and again, until he couldn’t take it anymore. So, he asked her out on a proper date. And after that, they both had fallen helplessly in love with each other. Although, after year 3 of them being together, things started to fall. He had gotten accepted into the BAU under Agent Hotchners authority, so he was barely he had moved to Virginia which meant long distance. At first, they thought they could do it, and they did, but that was until she had started finally her first year as an intern.

They started seeing each other less, and less, and less. And so they called it off. And although on the call, they kept everything reserved, it was all waterworks after. Y/N didn’t talk to anyone for a week and Spencer developed a drug addiction. Although at first, he thought it was because of what had happened with Tobias Hankel, he soon concluded that it was also powered by the breakup.

Of course, though, time passed. She started to see other people, and he started getting help. She started to really plan out the future, and he started to enjoy the moment, and live now, not in the past. She started to become him. And he started to become her.

“Ugh, how are you? Long time no see.” He said awkwardly as she kept on looking down.

“Good, good. How are you?” Her sweet angelic voice, which might have been silkier than before.

“Better.”

They both stayed in awkward silence for a couple of seconds which truly felt like decades.

“Here,” she said while moving to an empty booth, “sit.” And so he did. Him playing with his feet and her looking out the window until she suddenly asked a question. “So, are you still working at the BAU?”

“Yeah… Yep, still working there.”

“That’s nice.” She mumbled.

“How’s your work?” He asked, trying to start up a conversation as he pulled up a menu.

Suddenly something changed in her tone. She became more joyful. Happier. She straightened her back and moved the hair on her shoulder back. Spencer had noticed this. This was exactly what she would do when he asked about anything relating to what she was learning in college. She truly loved what she did, and for that, he was happy. “My work is great! I just got my first solo surgy, and that was fun! I mean, of course, it’s exhausting, but I truly love it. And Macey. You remember Macey right?”

Of course, he remembered Macey. Anyone who knew Y/N in college would remember Macey. They were the best of friends, absolutely inseparable. There wouldn’t be a time of the day where they weren’t together. All, except coffee time. Because that was strictly reserved for Spencer.

“Yeah, of course, I do. Who wouldn’t?” She simply laughed.

“Yeah, well she just got engaged!”

“Macey? Macey Williams? Married! She couldn’t keep a guy for more than 2 weeks.”

“I know! But a little after we broke up, she met this guy named Brian and they were just good together.”

It got a little quiet after she had mentioned the breakup. Spencer looked back down to his menu as if it was a foreign topic and Y/N frowned while grabbing a menu for herself.

Although her initial plan was to grab a coffee and go. Just like she always does, she decided to stick around today, knowing she wouldn’t get a moment like this again.

“So, what will you two lovely people want today?” The waiter chipped while walking up to them.

“Oh, I’ll have 2 buttermilk pancakes: blueberry. Scrambled eggs, and a coffee.”

“And I’ll be having a strawberry mango crepe, 2 croissants, and one coffee.”

“Great! Will that be all?” They both looked at each other then nonned. “Amazing, we will get your orders out as soon as possible!” And with that, she skipped away.

“So, besides work, anything fun happen to you?” Y/N questioned Spencer while toying with her bandaid.

“Well, I mean not much. I have an incredible team though! They are truly some of the most important people in my life. And my mother also of course. Although she hasn’t gotten better, I still write her a letter every day. And see her at least once every other month. And I’m a Godfather now!”

She always loved how excited he had gotten whenever he was talking about the BAU or his team. For such a messed up job, he truly loved it. And that’s all that really mattered.

She laughed, in pure and absolute joy. “Wow! That’s amazing,”

He laughed too. “It is! Isn’t it! What’s going on in your life? Besides works, please.”

“Well, besides work, I’m gonna say my life is going pretty well. You know, I have some friends, and I have this little town. My boyfriend and I broke up, but honestly, I’m glad we did. He was really holding me down. And I mean, without him ever breaking up, I would have never moved into this little paradise. Plus, I mean, it’s closer than my old home. But, I too am a godmother! My sister, Eleanor, don’t think you ever met her, but she had my niece. A true angel honestly. But yeah, my life has been going. Smooth and steady.”

“Well, I’m sorry that your boyfriend broke up with you, but his lost, right?”

“Well, it wasn’t mine, that’s for sure.”

Soon enough their food came, and conversations continued. A couple more coffees were ordered and so was another crepe. Spencer and Y/N sat in that booth for what felt like hours. Just listening to each other. Whether that be laughing or reminiscing about old memories. Spencer couldn’t help but look at her hair. How he was a sucker for that hair. Always was. And her laugh. Whenever she laughed, he smiles just a little more until it turned into a full-on grin. A grin full of happiness and joy. And for her, every time he would say anything remotely smart-assy, she would start laughing. Every single time. Because, no matter how much she used to love him, he couldn’t stand the fact that he knew everything. Except, of course when she needed to study for a test.

They soon though, had to carry on with their lives. Apart from each other. In a realm where they will never see the other again.

“Can I walk you to your car? I’m gonna bike around the city, and I don’t think I would feel safe knowing you were driving with me on the same road.” He teased.

“Ha ha okay, I get it. I suck at driving. But, to your case, I have, actually, gotten really good at driving.”

“Sure, sure. Whatever will you happy.” He teased her as she looked up at him and scoffed. Pulling out her keys from her clutch. “Well, this is my stop.”

“Alright. Well, then I better get going. It was marvelous seeing you again.”

Y/N now had a choice to make. 1: Go after the man she once loved and go on a date, knowing that the chances of a happy ending are few to none. Or 2: Leave this incident be and carry on with her life.

“Wait!” She called out. He immediately stopped. So she caught up with him. “Do you wanna, um, I don’t know, possibly just, maybe, go out? Whenever you’re next free on your stay?”

Unlike making such a big of a deal out of it like he did last time she asked him out for coffee, this time he immediately said, “Yes.”

“Really? That’s great,” she spoke in disbelief that he would say yes. “Well, when are you next free?”

“I’m free for the next week and a half.”

“Great see you on Wednesday!” She said whilst getting in her cars. But before she left, she asked him, “Wait, Spence, do you need my number? It hasn’t changed from the one you had so-”

“Nope! Edition memory, remember?”

“Who could forget.” She turned on her engine, and before heading out of the little town that was oh so special to him, she yelled something which he vaguely picked up. “Call me!”

And with that, Spencer set off. Aiming for the sunset on the once in a blue sunny day. And going to them there was only one thing he could think about, her number. Because, of course, he had the eidetic memory, so he was never going to forget. But that’s not the reason he remembered her phone. I never was, never will be.

tagging: @criminalmindsmoodrn, @marshmallowtraver, @himarisolace