#but when you write stuff you're proud of and it feels like it's barely getting read it's hard to keep momentum.

[novelconcepts]

i don't make resolutions, but if i did

it would be to finish this fic

(and to be kind to myself for however long it takes to actually do so)

[eustasskidagenda]

Hi! I love your writing! Can I ask some headcanons with Kid, Sanji, Zoro, Law et Luffy going to the beach with their S/O, please?? Tysm!

Hello sweet anon! Thank you for requesting, it was fun to write. Hope it will match your expectations ☆

☆ Kid, Sanji, Zoro, Luffy & Law going to the beach with their s/o

CW : g/n reader, funny, fluff, Kid is cursing but I guess no one is surprised, Kid is a savage, really vague mention of sex for Sanji, slight cursing for Zoro + mention of alcohol,

WC : 2,3k

Kid

Heavy stomps, mumbling curses, regular sighs and grunts full of irritation. Yep. It was your idea to go to the beach. Kid would never go to the beach by himself because he hates all the screaming children and the sand between his toes. And, the sun could ruin his make-up. So he would act all grumpy, wondering what he has done to end up in such a situation. 

"Goddamn, y/n, come back, you didn't put your sunscreen" Of course Kid thinks about his skin all the damn time, he's such a beauty-influencer when it comes to make-up and skin care. If you neglect to apply sunscreen to your body, he will bark at you, grab you by the wrist, and do all the work himself. And then, you'll have to help him, especially when it comes to applying sunscreen to his back. He won't let you know he loves when you run your hands down his back and along his always tensed shoulders. 

"I've seen this place before you, fuck off!" While planting violently your parasol on the ground, barking to the poor innocent guy who tried to set his stuff at the place Kid noticed in first. "It's my beach."

He's so possessive with everything, help.

Actually, Kid likes one thing about the beach: he can brag about his big man boobies. No shirt, just his glorious bare, toned chest. Every time someone looks at him with jealousy or admiration, he feels so proud; his ego is never satisfied with this. He's perfectly aware of how shaped his torso is, and he's really proud of it. 

Every time someone looks at your body, he feels really pleased with himself. Even if they try, they won't be able to have you. But on the flip side, he's also upset when he realizes that everyone can see your beautiful shapes. His arm would be wrapped around your waist. All. The. Time. 

Kid being Kid, he would smash all the sandcastle made by the children. Prepare yourself to get in trouble with all the mad parents around there, while their children are crying because "the big scary man told me I'm a piece of shit who don't even know how to build a sandcastle" You better watch Kid tightly before he stuffs their mouths with some sand to make them shut up.

"Come on Kid, it's just a child." 

If you try beach sports, he will make everything a competition. Avoid playing volley beach with him, because if you team up and lose, he will smash the ball into the winner's face. "Now who's the loser?" 

If someone tries to sell him an ice cream, he would scowls madly. Does he look like someone licking some fucking ice balls full of sugar? Ugh. It's so ridiculous. 

He doesn't wear armbands because he thinks he's too good for them. "I don't care if I can't swim, I won't use those damn armbands." 

Honestly, Kid hates how weak he is in the water, so he would stay away from trouble. The ocean makes his voice weak, even his strength is leaving him. And, even if his eyeliner is waterproof, he doesn't want to risk ruining his make up. "I fucking hate water" 

Would end up using his DF to find some metal around and build something with it while you're swimming. It looks like he doesn't care, but secretly, he watches to make sure you're safe. And if you're drowning, then, he'll run to save you so yes, congrats, now you're drowning together. 

Luckily, Killer is not too far.

Killer deserves a break.

Sanji 

Oh, damn... going on a beach date with Sanji is not a good idea. All the women in swimsuits would overwhelm him. Sanji, as he is, wouldn't be able to handle all the women around him, even though you are the prettiest of all the people around.

But the moment you take off your clothes and replace them with your swimsuit, his eyes would be on you all the time because you're the most mesmerizing person in the whole universe. 

He's so proud to introduce you as his s/o to absolutely everyone, yes, even that one person sleeping peacefully under their parasol. "Have you seen how beautiful y/n is?" 

Of course, he would help you apply sunscreen to your skin. Enjoy the massage because his hands are so heavenly smooth and divine. He would clearly take advantage of the situation to place some soft kisses along your collarbone, shoulders, neck, jugular, and down your spines. 

It's clear that Sanji brought his own food to the beach. You can enjoy fresh drinks, ice cream, waffles, cakes, fresh salads, and juicy fruits just for you. He wouldn't let you buy some ice cream from the trader because it's probably disgusting, full of sugar and chemicals. Your body is a temple and cannot be contaminated by non-premium quality food. 

He's probably causing the parents to be angry because he's smoking. But Sanji is nice, so if it was asked politely, he wouldn't mind stubouting his cigarette. 

While you're tanning under the parasol, Sanji is probably laying next to you, with a book explaining all the fish he could buy in the town. 

If you decide to go swimming, of course, he's going with you. As the kind person he's, he wants to make sure you're safe, and if you uncomfortable with your body, he wouldn't mind using his own body as a shield, so no one but he can look at you. 

He's a pure romantic, so prepare yourself for some lovely hugs in the water, with him holding you tight and his hands roaming all over your wet skin. Sweet kisses on your neck. He's not against taking things further, but he's romantic and all the screaming children are ruining the mood. But during the night... yes, he's definitely not against swimming at midnight. 

And if he finds some ugly, green, gummy seaweeds, then, he'll take them back to the Sunny. "Marimo, don't let your children alone at the beach."

Zoro

"Oi, y/n, where are you?"

Well, have you already seen Finding Nemo? Remember about Marlin always asking "HAVE YOU SEEN MY SON?" Now, you're Marlin and Zoro is your Nemo. 

Do not leave him alone for more than two seconds. Do not leave him buying ice cream for the two of you. Otherwise, the date is ruined. The only thing you will do is ask everyone 'Have you seen a big man with big boobs and green hair?' 

Maybe he'll find the one piece before the end of the day.

"I wasn't lost, your indications weren't clear." 

Zoro's obliviousness means you need to pay close attention to him. Stay close to him and everything will be okay. He's in good shape, so people are probably looking at him with admiration, jealousy, or whatever thoughts come to mind. But he doesn't give a damn, and is probably thinking people are looking at you because you're mesmerizing in your swimsuit. 

He doesn't care about the people wearing swimsuits around him. It's not an event for him. "I won't nose bleed like this shitty twirled-brow." 

He thinks the beach is a good opportunity to train himself. While you're relaxing under the parasol, he's training in the sun. Burpees, push-ups, and even some yoga are used to work his breathing and stability. 

Once he's done, he's all sweaty and wants to swim a bit. If you don't follow him, he'll be swimming until he finds a new island. 

If you're too lazy to swim, he'd be okay with carrying you. If a jellyfish tries to bite your thigh, then, the poor creature is doomed and would end up as a dinner for the crew when you'll get back to the Sunny.

He prefers alcohol over ice cream, of course. It's the best thing to enjoy after swimming and training. While he's drinking, he likes when you rest your head against his chest. On the other hand, he's a bit flustered because Zoro cares about his privacy. But you're too cute, he can't push you away. 

Arms wrapped around your waist while you sleep together. Perfect date for Zoro: training and restlessness. No one would dare trying to steal your stuff because Zoro is used to standing guard on the Sunny, so he would react really quickly. 

At the end of the day, he got the biggest sunburn ever because he forgot to apply sunscreen. Poor Zoro.

Luffy

It's like going to the beach with your overly excited dog. 

He's yelling excitedly, jumping everywhere, laughing loudly, and oh, good luck, he's already running away. You tried to catch his wrist, but it just stretches his arm beyond its limits. Good luck in finding him. 

Well, honestly, if you want to find Luffy, just try to figure out where the food is. He's probably eating some waffles and ice cream, or more precisely, emptying all the stands of their food. 

"Oh Y/N, you're here?" He speaks with his mouth full, obviously. 

Luffy is selfish with food, but he would let you have the last waffle because he loves to see you smile. 

As Zoro, he doesn't give a damn about people in swimsuits. 

If a child has a better rubber ring than him, he's sad. "Y/N, we need to buy a better one! What about this one?" While displaying an extravagant beetle rubber.

He's so happy, with it. Prepare yourself to pull him out the water because while he's watching to find some fish or play with some seaweeds, he would end up falling overboard like the overexcited child he's. 

But drowning wouldn't destroy his joy. Be ready for the sandcastle episode after the rubber ring one. He wants to build the best one. But have you seen his nonexistent artistic skills? His creations wouldn't look great, that's all we can tell. Please, help him building a pretty sandcastle, he's so sad. Poor baby.

"Don't get a sunburn, y/n." While lending you his straw hat. 

"Y/N, have you seen those crabs? Y/N, have you seen how funny this seaweed is? Y/N, have you seen this stone? Oh, Y/N, this cloud looks like Zoro, don't you think?" 

He wants to catch all the crabs and winkles he can find. And would probably end up organizing a crab fight. If his favorite one loses, then the poor baby will be sad again. He's so fluffy when he pouts.

He is eager to try and do everything with you. So you better follow him, because going to the beach with Luffy means you'll never be able to rest peacefully under the parasol. He's too energized to sleep peacefully. 

And if you're sleeping, he would bury you under the sand, so when you wake up, your body is totally covered up, the only thing you can do is moving your toes and head while Luffy laughs loudly and proudly. His laugh is so endearing, you can't be angry with him.

"Gum-Gum… ice-cream stolen" 

Prepare to run away from the guy who is mad at him.

Overall? Not relaxing at all, but funny as hell.

Law

If Luffy is like an overexcited dog, Law is like a cat forced to bathe. Have you already tried bathing a cat? Do you end up with scratches? It's nothing compared to Law.

"Bepo, don't sharpen your claws on the deck!" "What? But it's not me. It's Law, Y/N decided to bring him to the beach. They had to drag him to the ground. 

Yes, Law probably hates the beach. It's a noisy place with noisy people, the food smells bad, the children are annoying, and the sand is irritating. And please, the sea is like the toilet for the fish and all those disgusting people. He's so pissed off to be here. 

"Why me, Y/N-ya?"

"Aren't you happy? The sun is beautiful today! You need to take some breaks from your work." 

His sole response would be an annoyed scowl. 

Ain't no way for him to wear a swimsuit. He's conserving all his clothing, even the hat. And he's standing under the parasol with his arms crossed. All the people around are probably avoiding him, and that's for the best because a 'room, shambles' could happen really fast if they dare to make a comment about his non-appropriate clothes. 

Law would remind you to apply sunscreen on a regular basis.  And he wouldn't mind applying it himself. He loves the feeling of your skin against his palms, it feels like heaven. 

He would remind you to drink water frequently. And to wet your neck before swimming. Certainly, he's watching closely the entire time. He may be mad, but he cares about you. Prepare yourself to have a shadow following you everywhere. If you're too far from him, he'll use his DF to bring you back to him.

"Please, help me, my child needs a doctor!" He's annoyed as hell. Even at the beach, work is still pursuing him. Of course, if someone asked for a doctor, he would help. He's frustrated because he can't take care of someone and keep an eye on you at the same time.

If you give him onigiri, he will look like a child: pouting while eating silently. 

"Y/n-ya, don't touch this, it's a toxic seaweed.", "y/n-ya, come here, you have to stay hydrated."

He would lend you his own hat if you forgot yours, while he's standing under the parasol. "Do not lose my hat." 

No swimming for him. He'll stay away from the cursed water. Just like Kid, ain't no way for him to wear armbands. And if you Try to throw some water on his face, he would look like a wet cat: shocked and angry. Beware, he yowls.

Overall? You had fun. And even if Law acts annoyed all the time, secretly, he would love to have a break day with you.  On his desk, he would keep the beautiful shell you found on the beach and give it to him.

[sidekick-hero]

(steddie | teen | 2.3k | tags: rockstar!eddie, addiction, rehab, journaling, only Eddie's entries turn into letters to Steve | Part 2 to Carry You | @steddielovemonth prompt Love is about a hand reaching out to you so you don't get lost by @yournowheregirl | AO3)

Edited for a big shout out to @steves-strapcollection whose lovely OC has a little cameo here. If you want to know who Tig is, you can find out here. Spoiler: he's amazing and we love him.

Day 0

Dear Steve,

Hi Stevie,

Apparently, it's not good to "bottle up" your feelings. They say it makes drinking or drugs or any other addiction so tempting. It makes it easier to keep all that stuff inside you and let it fester until you need more and more of whatever it is that helps you cope. So the first rule of rehab: Talk, don't take.

That's a long way of saying I need to keep a journal like a 13-year-old girl with her first crush. It's either that or a daily crying session with the other "inmates" here, and I'd rather not have to tell Terry the old gossip my own tragic sob story. She already told me the life stories of two other patients here at dinner.

Instead, I decided to write to you. You're the one person I regret the most pushing away, and even though you'll probably never see this, it feels good to tell you these things now. Like a dry run. Because, baby, when I get out of here, I swear I will let you in. I won't make the same mistakes.

You will never go another day without knowing how much you mean to me.

How much I love you.

You only left an hour ago and I already miss you. I can't believe I've survived six months without you. Well, I barely did. I wish I could call you, but phone privileges are only for those who make it through their first week here.

I know we chose this center together knowing that they don't allow visitors for at least three weeks. Maybe longer if my therapist says I'm not ready. Fuck, three weeks didn't sound so bad when we talked about it, but now? In this ugly, impersonal room that smells clean but is totally clinical. You know, that mix of disinfectant and sterile air with a hint of medication lingering in the background. It sounds like an eternity and then some.

Nothing here feels comfortable or warm, and I miss your face so much it physically hurts.

But I promised myself I'd do whatever it took. For you and Wayne, for the boys and the kids.

So, day 0, the journey begins.

Fuck, I almost forgot: I'm supposed to answer three questions every day.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

See above. I miss you, that's how I am. I want this to be over. I hate that I'm here and even more that I'm the one who got me here. I feel like a fuckup. It's hard not to when I see how I've ruined everything good in my life. But then I remember the way you kissed me goodbye. The smile on your face when you told me how proud you were of me. The way you kissed my hand because you couldn't let go and whispered, "I'll see you soon," and I want to have hope.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Get through the day without doing anything I'll regret.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

You. That you didn't give up on me. (And the Gummi Bears you hid at the bottom of the bag, you minx. Thank you.)

Day 4

Sweetheart,

I'm not doing so well. It's hard. Who am I kidding? It sucks. My body hurts from how much I want to use. My brain is so very loud, Stevie. So, so loud. I try to remember how you managed to calm me down when my brain got like this. What helped the most was to wear me out by fucking me senseless, but that's not an option. But maybe I will try to go for a walk or even do some of those exercises you always tried to get me to do. The ones that usually led to fucking because I could never behave.

My therapist is nice. Her name is Laura, and so far she's taking everything I throw at her in stride. Talking to her feels like pulling my own teeth and I feel like shit afterwards, but I sleep better. Who would have thought, huh?

I miss you.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Not good. I wonder if I can really do this. It doesn't feel like it right now. I'm afraid I won't make it. That I will screw up again. That if I do, it'll kill me and I'll be grateful because I couldn't live with myself if I did.

I don't want to die, Stevie.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Talk to the weird kid who always sits by himself during meals. He looks lost. Maybe he knows DnD.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Still you. Every day. Wayne, for taking me in when I felt like a failure too. Unlovable. Worthless. He never stopped believing in me. Even when I gave him every reason not to. I don't know how I deserve him or you, but I am so fucking grateful.

Day 7

Fuck, I missed your voice. God. I'm sorry I lost it like that. I didn't want the first thing you heard from me after a week apart to be me ugly sobbing into the phone.

I wanted to tell you so many things. I had a plan, you know? But hearing your voice when you said, "Hi, baby," it just broke me. You sounded like you missed me too, like you were relieved to hear my voice too, and you didn't even realize how scared I was that you wouldn't.

We just hung up, but I want to call you again. Just to hear you breathing on the other side so I know you're still there. Waiting for me. Your hand still gripping mine so I wouldn't get lost.

You said, "I'll hear you tomorrow," like it was set in stone, no doubt about it. It made me feel, fuck, I don't even know. Like this is real. I didn't die on that bathroom floor, and you giving me another chance isn't some kind of hallucination or afterlife dream.

I'm rambling, sorry. Even in writing I can't help it.

One day I'll write it all down in a way that makes sense, I promise.

I love how patient you are with me. No one has ever been. I was always too loud, too distracted, too weird, too complicated, too much. But not to you.

I wish you were here to take me in your arms, it's hard not to fall apart without you holding me together.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Better. Fucking determined to get through this and get back to you. Still scared.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Have a real conversation with you without breaking down on the phone. Here's to hoping. Detoxing and being sober has given me a hair trigger on my emotions, it seems.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Your patience. Your grace. Your voice in my ear. That you still haven't given up on me. DnD, for giving me a purpose when I needed one, a tool to give others the help I so desperately wanted. The weird kid's name is Alex, and he does know DnD. We'll try to find more people for a campaign.

Day 16

Steve, baby,

I am so fucking sorry. Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. I'm such an asshole. Please pick up the phone. I need to tell you how sorry I am. I didn't mean it, I was just scared. When you said that maybe Laura was right and you shouldn't come to see me next week if I wasn't ready, I thought you didn't want me anymore. That you finally got tired of holding my hand and watching me do those damn baby steps. It's been over two weeks, why am I not better? Why am I not done with this shit?

I want to be done, I swear.

Please don't leave me.

Please pick up the phone.

Please, please, please.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Fuck this shit, what good is it if I keep hurting you?

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Stop being a fucking asshole.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

I want it to be you, but I'm not sure I even have you in my life anymore.

Day 23

Stevie,

I'm scared. Isn't this the stupidest thing you've ever heard? A few days ago I begged to see you. Fuck, I was so desperate to see you that I almost ruined everything. I'm still sorry, I hope you know that. I know, I know, you said that it's okay and that it can't be all smooth sailing, that you forgive me. That you'll keep forgiving me as long as I keep coming back to talk to you, to explain, to show you that I mean it.

And now I've got the all clear for you to come and see me, and I'm too scared to tell you.

I'm still not the man I want to be. The man who deserves someone like you.

Laura told me that love isn't something you deserve, it's something freely given. We don't decide if someone can love us, only they do. And that I have to stop pushing people away because I'm convinced they can't love me. It's their choice and I shouldn't try to take it away from them.

I think about this a lot.

I want to let you love me, I do. It's just hard for me to understand why you would want to do that at all. It's something Laura wants to work on with me as well.

There is so much work to do. I hate to bother you with it. To make it your problem. I wanted to come in here and two weeks later walk out a new man. A better one. One you can love easily and who can love you back in a way you can understand. A man Wayne can be proud to call his son. A man Gareth and Jeff and Grant want to have as a friend, as a bandmate. A man the kids can look up to as much as they look up to you.

Laura said I should take the hand you are holding out to me. It's a decision I make every day. I took it in the hospital. I took it when you drove me here.

I should take it by letting you in, letting you see the work in progress that I am right now.

I think I will call you after dinner to tell you.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

Fuck if I know. It's a lot to feel when you've numbed your feelings for so long. I remember why I did it, but I won't do it again, I'll learn to deal with it.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

Take you in my arms and hold you. Let myself be held by you.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

Your hand in mine. The thought of you that keeps me going. Your bravery. Dustin and Mike and Will and Lucas. They call me all the time, you know. Asking me about my first campaign here, telling me about their lives. Keeping in touch, even though I failed them almost as much as my old man did me.

Day 31

Steve, my love,

You're on your way to pick me up and I can't believe we made it here. It's not done, it probably never will be. I know that now. I have to keep working on myself and being well. But it's so fucking worth it, Stevie.

I'm glad that Laura agreed to stay my therapist even if I leave the center. I trust her. She gets me, she knows when to push me and tell me the ugly truth, and when I need time to process things.

I haven't told you yet, but I'm not going back to Corroded Coffin. At least not right now. I talked to the guys and they all agreed that it's best if I take some time for myself. And for you. For my family and friends. They actually have a guy named Tig who auditioned while I was here and they like him. He's good, they sent me a demo. They asked me if it would be okay and I said it would be. It's true, even though it hurts. I have to do this for myself.

Because I am going to give this to you later, I want to tell you something here before I lose my courage.

Steve. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I know I haven't always shown you the way you deserve. Hell, some days I certainly didn't act like it. My worst days. But I never stopped loving you. I don't think I ever will.

But I also learned to like myself a little better here. I no longer want to punish myself for things that were out of my control, like my mom dying or my dad not caring enough for me to stay. I want to be loved. I want you to love me. I want to let you.

I want to finally leave the past behind and allow myself to think about the future. And whenever I do, you're in it. You're the anchor, the epicenter of all my plans.

Stevie, sweetheart, I want to marry you.

Don't worry, I'm not proposing. This is just something I needed to tell you. Someday I want to be your husband, if you want me.

You are my past, my present and my future.

This is me taking your hand every day until I die or you stop reaching for me.

How are you doing right now? Don't hold back.

So fucking excited to have you all to myself again. Seriously, I'm going a little crazy. I'm also hopeful about the future. And in love. I'm so fucking in love with you.

What do you want to accomplish tomorrow?

To start our life together without forgetting what came before.

What are you grateful for in your own life today?

My second chance.

[spdrvyn]

a Miguel x f!reader "who did this to you?" Angst fic?

bewitched by bandages — MIGUEL O'HARA

SUMMARY: as per usual, you were spending your late-nights fighting crime and trying to protect the city to the best of your ability. as you are in the midst of a strenuous battle, you're sucked into a portal which brings you to what you assume to be another dimension.

THIS FIC CONTAINS: violence. harassment. somewhat detailed descriptions of wounds. angst. hurt/comfort. translated spanish (i didn't use google translate). f!reader

NOTES: GOD I LOVE THIS TROPE SO MUCH HOLY SHIT thank you anon for sending me this ask i was gonna do this kind of thing w miguel eventually but like still mwah, sorry for being ia too btw... i'm trying to avoid getting burnt out n shit so that i keep writing stuff for you guys 🫶 anyway, ENJOOOY

"You will never be apart of this."

Those were the last words uttered to you before proclaimed protector of the multiverse, Miguel O'Hara, disappeared into the portal possibly never to be seen again.

He thought so too. At least, until he came back a week later due to yet another anomaly showing up in your dimension. Then another, then another, then another.

Humiliating was an understatement. What kind of Spider-Woman were you if you couldn't even take down one anomaly? Every time trouble came, Miguel was there to fix it. For once, you wanted to be the one to catch the beast. Hold it's severed head up to him with a big, fat smile on your face.

But that was a distant dream, only to be seen after you collapse onto your bed after an exhausting day.

You felt even more hurt when you found out that he was the leader of some kind of Spider Society. Yet, as he said when he first met you, you just weren't capable enough to join it.

Granted, he explained that it was an elite strike force but still. You were proud of yourself for making it this far into the whole Spider-woman gig, turns out that the bar was higher than you thought it was. It saddened you, deeply.

Though with time comes change. You've honed your skills and now confident enough to laugh in the face of who you were months ago, if an anomaly ever showed up again you'd show Miguel who's boss (not literally) and finally be able to join that god forsaken society.

You were much more confident in battle, actually much more confident in general. It was like you were an entirely different person to the criminals that you cowered before at night and the other more important people in your life at day.

However, there were moments where that confidence faltered.

Moments where you felt like that terrified, shameful, and naive little spider that you were mere months ago. A moment like now as you were being absolutely destroyed by one of your regular enemies.

You didn't know his name, you didn't want to bother trying to know anyway. He was the type of villain to give those excruciatingly long monologues that only dragged more and more time out of your excruciatingly long nights. So you just called him tech guy.

He is exactly what he sounds like. Covered from almost head-to-toe with different kinds of technologically advanced weaponry that made you wonder if he'd work as an appliance in a smart home.

Even when you enjoyed poking fun at the multiple devices stuck to his body, he didn't. Continuing to upgrade himself more and more each time the both of you fought. You had a feeling in your gut that your devilishly charming personality would come back to bite you in the ass someday.

He had you under the heel of his boot, quite literally this time. You bite back a grunt as his shoe continues to press into you, barely being able to look back up, you can see the absolutely smug grin on his face.

"I warned you, Spider-Woman. If only you listened to me, you would've seen this coming from miles away!"

"I'm here to—" You want to bury your face into the pavement as you can feel something sharp pierce the small of your back. "Fight bad guys not listen to lectures!"

"And look at where not listening has gotten you, little spider." Tech guy chuckled, uncomfortably close to your ear. You try to pull away but he has you pinned and he's close, too close. You swore from the corner of your eye that he had his hand raised. About to strike.

This was it, he was going to knock you out. Take you back to who knows where. Or maybe even kill you right here and right now. Leaving your corpse on the street for the citizens of New York, the citizens that you swore you'd protect to be mortified by.

You were finished, your end had come. It terrified you, if people saw your fate, who would do this job? Who would be able to gain the courage to step up? Even after knowing the dangers that lurk and entail it?

Dangers such as a portal opening up on the floor beneath you, it was blinding as you squint and your senses are immediately flooded by what feels like everything.

It's like a strong gust of wind swoops you away, the distant yells of tech guy growing quieter and quieter.

This relieved you but pained you.

As you were being blissfully carried away from whatever force was helping you right now, it put a lot of pressure on the injuries that have sustained from that scuffle.

You tried to scream, yell, shout for anyone in this space but nothing. You curl up into a ball, in attempts for it stop and hope that your next destination is the sensation of nothingness.

It was like you were being torn apart then put back together. Shifting from each form. Solid, liquid, gas, solid, liquid, gas, solid liquid, gas, solid rooftop.

What?

You groaned, looking up at the night sky of whatever hell you just landed in. You tried to sit up and you were able to! But with a now bleeding lip in attempts to muffle the absolutely bloodcurdling scream that you were about to let out.

Wherever you were, it wasn't hell (thankfully) but it definitely wasn't New York. At least not your New York.

Everything was strangely futuristic. Flying cars, sleek architecture, a lot of grass to your surprise, and beautiful lights that finished the beautiful view off.

The rooftop that you had landed on was no different either, whoever owned this place had a spectacular taste in furniture and it showed here. As you looked to your side, it seemed that it also connected to a bedroom. An empty bedroom.

God, you were going to feel so guilty about this later.

Fighting back yet another pained noise from coming out of your mouth, you manage to build the strength to get up on your two feet and stumble towards the entrance.

You take your slow strides and get to observe the room in the process, it was very spacious. A huge monitor hanging on one wall, a huge closet on the other side, not to mention that it has a bathroom attached, what would it be without a huge bed in the middle of it all?

To your dismay, you're only able to make it a few steps in before needing to grip the bedsheets for dear life.

The dear life that you might lose when you hear the muted sounds of someone talking from outside.

You're not really able to make any words out but it sounded like whoever they were, they yelled out to someone. Suddenly, she appeared in front of you.

A lady, dressed in a somewhat lengthy but quite fashionable fur coat, she adorned a pair of heart shaped sunglasses as she looked at the TV in the room with a puzzled look on her face.

It's not long before she catches sight of you, eyes widening and both of you exchange glances. You bring your index finger to your mouth in a placating gesture but it only gets worse as she calls out:

"... Miguuueeeeel!"

Miguel? Miguel?

Frantically, you wave your hands around in an attempts to shush her but your heart rate spikes as her body practically phases through you. Hologram. You were throwing hands with a hologram.

And it's like the whole world stops when the bedroom door slides open, your worst fears had come true.

There he stood. Miguel O'Hara. Although something felt different, and you realized that his mask was off. The first thing that came to mind was the unamused pout that he wore, eyes that stared down at you disappointedly, and a broad frame that took up nearly the entire doorway.

The silence was deafening, you could hear it ringing in your ears. So deafening that you could hear your heart drumming in your chest, your shallow breaths, his footfalls as he walked over to you. Before turning his head to his hologram lady.

"Lyla, scan this." Lyla nodded before looking you up and down, wherever her eyes followed it scanned. She turns back to Miguel with the prognosis on your injuries. "Fifteen scratches, ten bruises, and a slightly fractured rib."

The noise that Miguel let out irked you a little, you could feel how heavy it was as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I have a lot of articles that could help with fixing this mess, big guy."

"No, it's fine. I can deal with this myself,"

"If you say so."

Lyla seemingly poofs into thin air, leaving you alone with him and a whole lot of questions that you have to ask. Even then, even if you were the one technically intruding in his home, you couldn't break the silence. Where to even start?

"Who did this to you?" Well, okay. That was a start. You tried to open your mouth to even get a small explanation out but as you attempted to piece your thoughts together, the more it felt like your brain fogged up.

Miguel had unfortunately noticed this too, what a way to make an impression after weeks of not seeing each other. "Just sit down." You obviously complied, careful not to let any blood drip down onto his sheets, you hoped that you wouldn't embarrass yourself further.

Those months of training, those months of self-improvement, those months of trying to be better all shattered within an instant as you saw Miguel rummage through his closet, cursing under his breath until he emerged with a first aid kit.

It felt so hard to think about anything and everything. Well, not really. There were a million thoughts racing through your head right now, most of them being what exactly was going through Miguel's head.

Was he disappointed? It would be a lot more unlikely if he wasn't if you were completely honest. Was he upset? If you saw someone you didn't hold in a high regard just magically appear on the roof of your home all beat up, you wouldn't be the happiest in the world.

There wasn't even a single peep out of him as he opened the small kit, equipping himself with what looked to be a medical cream and rolls of bandages. You spared him just a small glance, you were expecting him to look you dead in the eye with nothing but pure unbridled rage for ruining his night but instead?

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

He was laser focused on treating you right now or what you had thought to be a more plausible situation: he was just too disheartened to even look at you.

And you completely understood why, therefore ripping your gaze away from his eyes and moving down to his hands instead. You watched intently as the part around his hands dissolved into mere pixels before he swiped up a good amount of the cream onto his fingers, then gestured for you to hold your arm out.

Once the medicine came into contact with your wounds, tears dared to prick at your eyes. Fuck, it hurt a lot but you didn't really need to ruin his impression of you any further. You resorted to biting down hard on your lip and turning your head away.

Miguel, being the ever observant one, noticed this as well.

"You owe me an explanation." He was right. You did. You were quite confident that if you stayed radio silent for the rest of the night, you would be sleeping on the cold, cold streets of this world. "I've surmised that you got sucked into a portal then ended up here but most don't end up with injuries this bad."

There goes a good chunk of your explanation, which played well on your end. You didn't even want to begin describing what being transported from dimension to dimension felt like. Still, you wanted to play this cool.

"I was just in a fight, it was nothing serious."

"Nothing serious? Did you hear the results of that scan?"

You can't help how your cheeks flush at his quip, perhaps you were playing it too cool. If you tried too hard, he'd probably be able to see right through you but before you could even attempt defending yourself, he butts in.

"Qué dolor de cabeza." You heard him mutter. "I need more details about this, how many people were in the fight? What were they like? I'm not a mind reader."

His tone was harsh, it felt like he was cutting your scars open rather than healing them. You semi-understood why he was a leader, he had a way of making demands that was for sure.

"It was just one guy, but he had a lot of mechanical attachments. Saws, tentacles, other blades." As you explained, Miguel finished up bandaging your arm and gestured for your other one. You shifted slightly in position and held that up as well, sucking in a sharp breath as he goes through the routine of applying the disinfectant.

He seemed to just hum at your answer like he wasn't relentlessly asking you questions moments ago, you assumed that he wanted to hear more information so you kept talking. Like an idiot.

"I'm not the biggest tech person, you know? I was just swinging through and then he ambushed me, every time I've encountered him, he just continued to get stronger and stronger."

"Every time? How many times exactly?"

He emphasized 'exactly' as if you were actually supposed to count but even if you presented those kinds of details with a whole ass statistic chart, the answer would still disappoint him.

"Probably more than five. Like I said, he upgrades and–"

"Yes, yes. You said that already." He interrupts you again, hurriedly finishing up your arm before he rolls up the bandages; throwing them back into the aid kit with a very audible thud.

If there was another talent of his, it would be how very quickly he's able to shatter your pride.

"What are you trying to do here?" He asks you. You know you shouldn't be asking questions at risk of making yourself look even more stupid but with how vague that was, it felt like you had the right to. "What are you talking about?"

"You're trying to impress me. I'm asking you this stuff to know more about the nature of your injuries and you're trying to goddamn impress me. Why?"

Oh.

Clearly, since it felt like he knew so much more about you, you just looked at him. How could this possibly get any worse after all? No matter what you said, no matter how hard you tried, it would all be for naught in the end.

"If this is about what I said when we first met, these antics of yours seriously aren't helping your case." Your body went numb. "Then, after I clear all the anomalies in your dimension, you come flying back to me. Seriously?"

Your mind went numb.

This felt like more than just a reality check to you, no. Every single criticism that shot back at you continued to break you down into smaller, smaller pieces.

You dreamt about meeting him again someday, and it did not look like this in the slightest. Only now, if you thought about what that scenario would be like, you'd conk yourself in the head for being so fucking delusional.

The distant dream of him entering your dimension, to see an anomaly in your capable hands, to hear that gravelly voice that has only continued to criticize you praise you for your deeds, then you'd get recruited into the Spider Society and save the multiverse to your heart's content.

Oh, how dumb and naïve you were. Clearly, you still are both of those things. His words spoke enough about that. You didn't want to be here as much as he did.

"I didn't want this," You finally said, the most coherent thought throughout this whole mess. "Any of this to happen. I just– I don't get it at all."

"Don't get what?"

"What I'm doing wrong," You sigh, lip quivering as tears dared to fall. This time, it wasn't because of medicine. You hoped it was. "I've trained for so long, I've tried my hardest. You might not think so but I have, I really have. But it seems like I'm making a mess of it all."

With each second that passed, the dam dared to break.

An uncomfortable silence blanketed the room, but this one scared you even more. A while ago, even if he didn't say a word, you knew how he felt about you. About your predicament.

But now? You had no clue. He could embrace you, comfort you, tell you that it's okay and he understood how you felt. You could've pushed his temper to his limits, he would scream, shout, yell, and kick you out of his penthouse.

"This doesn't have anything to do with your training," Like that, Miguel took a sharp pin to the atmosphere and popped it. "It has something to do with your mindset."

Now, you were the one to give him a confused glare. He sighs, eyes scanning over your sorry state once more,

"You did this, all this, to get into my strike force and to woo me whatnot." Before looking back up at you. Don't be mistaken, the harshness in his face is still there but from what he was saying, it didn't seem to be what you had originally thought.

"The reason why you're so stuck is because I shouldn't be the first goal in your mind, you should. Are you following?" You nod.

"Good. You need to understand, this job isn't about trying to meet a standard or getting someone to notice you. Self-improvement. It's all in the title. Self-improvement."

You shiver as his warm hand rests on your shoulder. "If you're already this hung up on trying to win me over, take a step back and think about who's approval matters more. Yours or mine?"

Yours.

It clicked. Everything fit into place and the dam broke, though that should have been more obvious to you when Miguel's face had started to look a little foggier.

At first, you had expected him to hand you a tissue or something but he didn't move from his place. Instead, resorting to rubbing his hand up and down your shoulder in a weird, seemingly unfitting gesture.

You swiftly wiped your tears away with your palm, stifling a sniffle as you ask yet another question.

"So, do you think I'll have a chance of getting in someday?"

A snarkly reply or scoff was what you had anticipated but what he just did was probably the most shocking turn of events looking back at the whole night.

He chuckled.

"I'll keep you in touch."

request rules here, masterlist here

[braxlrose]

things i imagine 2023 bf bill does

cw: oral (f! and m!recieving), fingering, etc

• if you've been together since the 2000s, he's so so so happy that you never judged him for how he looked and that even though his style changed you still stuck with him. he knows that's the bare minimum but he's experienced first hand how some people treat him because of how he looks and he loves that you're not like that

• obviously, yall still go shopping together like in the 2000s and it's tons of fun. he loves it when you two try on studded jackets together and when you pick out cute platform boots for him

• you two once had the greatest birthday sex in the history of birthday sex because you got him the "greatest platforms in the world!!". His words.

• and I mean it ^^, it went on for like 2 hours and by the time you guys were done you were ready to pass out. but he also had some other gifts to open 🤩

• his aftercare was literally amazing in the 2000s, but it's gotten even better with time. if it was super intense sex, he will not let go of you. even if you were subbing, with intense sex both doms and subs need aftercare.

• MATCHING HALLOWEEN COSTUMES 🗣🗣🗣 also you better hype of bill for whatever costume he does. like that year he did Ariel. If you didn't hype him up 😒 what are you even doing?

• going out and buying costumes with him for concerts

• he said in a tiktok live once that he does out to restaurants for every meal. breakfast, lunch and dinner. so you two do that basically everyday and you guys always order too much food and end up having left overs

• ‼️BAKING WITH HIM‼️

• you guys know how he loves his cheesecakes so you two make him all the time. and he teaches you how to bake some of his family recipes. but it always ends up with you guys a total mess because you were fooling around.

• also the mf is still a massive tease 💀 like bruh back off for two goddamn seconds

• like while you're kneeding dough he'd come up behind you and press his crotch into your ass and act like he was just grabbing a measuring cup. and the mf would just be smirking his ass off if your face got red

• tiktok lives all the time and you two bake together on those two. and sometimes tom comes in and helps you guys.

• cockwarming on tiktok lives 😍😍😍 (someone has gotta write that because oh em geeeeee I'm squirming and squeezing my thighs just thinking about it)

• he bites in bed. like when he's fingering you he'll bite your boob or literally any squishy part of you. and will get horny the next day if he sees you have bite marks on your body.

• he loves going to the beach with you. and you guys go with Tom and Heidi all the time too.

• now im very pale you guys. i hate tanning, I never want to be tan. It's just not for me, so if you're like that too bill will literally lather you in sonnencreme and bring an umbrella for you to stay under

• now if you're not like me and you like to tan then bill will buy you tanning oil and that mirror thing (I hope yall know what I'm talking about bc idk what its called)

• he gives you head scratches all the time because he always has long nails and it feels so good

• ON THAT NOTE, bill rarely fingers you because of his nails, but on the days he doesn't have any acrylic nails, he'll finger you like no tomorrow. but other than that he sticks to eating you out

• bakes you a cake all by himself for your birthday 🎂 he makes sure to get whatever flavor you like the best. strawberry, vanilla, chocolate, red velvet, whatever you want he'll do it. he decorates it himself and is very proud

• talks about you all the time in interviews and is smiling his ass off every time

• doing skincare together is a must!! you two have so much skin care stuff it's insane. serums, face masks (peel off, paper, clay, etc), lotions, moisturizers, oils, lip masks. literally everything.

• HE LOVES DOING YOUR MAKEUP and he gets so happy when you let him do it

• date nights with him are so much fun because you get to get all dressed up in a sexy outfit and go out to a fancy restaurant. plus the night usually ends in sex

• he loves it when you play with his rings on his fingers

• living room dance parties and karaoke happens all the time and you always end up on the floor laughing your asses off

• he buys Polaroid cameras and takes pictures of you guys all the time. at the mall shopping, on the beach, making sandcastles, you eating, baking together, him dicking you down with his cum all over your chest (who said that⁉️)

• showering together and doing hair masks

• loves pre and post concert head from you 😉

• binge watching TV shows together is something you two do a bunch. he gets all pouty if he found out you watched an episode without him.

• you guys manicures and pedicures all the time and you're always giggling and laughing with eachother the entire time

taglist: @hearts4kaulitz @burntb4bydoll @spelaelamela @bored0writer @fishinaband @billsleftnutt @tokiiohot @bluepoptartwithsprinkles @saumspam @5hyslv7

[c0smoshit]

Hello angel, here's my silly little angsty prompt:

"Cloud gets home after a mission. He's exhausted, but reader is happy to see him noneless. She knows he isn't a touch person, but she finds fun into teasing him a little, hoping it would make his day better... However, she senses that something is of; and Cloud, unsure if it's a mako flare-up or something else, prefers to let it go. Later that night, he's surprised (yet shattered) when his mom visits him, telling her son she is happy he found "the one" and how proud she is of her son.. When reader awakes to see a puzzled Cloud, she wonders what's the right move to make, only to follow her instinct."

Enjoy wrecking me 🤍

The one ミ★

⋆ ࣪. ℙ𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘 ≫ Cloud/fem!reader

⋆ ࣪. 𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 ≫ angst!, minor spoilers, past trauma, not proofread!

⋆ ࣪. 𝔸/ℕ ≫ reqs are closed bc I'm going to be busy next week and I wanna write some stuff by my own too so yeah, sorry 😭

⋆ ࣪. 𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕕𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥 ≫ 2.236 ( so many short fics omg )

It started off with your voice.

"Hey"

And then your hand would find his own, bringing him into your little world.

But as the hours passed by, you noticed that something was off, really off.

Maybe it was how lifeless his eyes seemed to be under your cold lighting, despite the beautiful contrast of mako green and natural blue.

Your hands helped him get his sword off him, your ears turning deaf as he told you it wasn't necessary.

He always tried to do everything on his own, he felt as if he was a burden to others. Ever since he was a kid, he thought that maybe it was better if he stayed quiet.

Maybe that was what life had been awaiting him for.

He loved silence, he loved quiet walks into the mountains by himself, whenever his mother would let him.

However, you were quite the opposite of quiet.

. . .

"Yeah, it's that weird guy I told you about"

"Why is he here?"

"Why is he wearing that in public?"

"I heard he was involved with that terrorist group"

Over and over again.

At this point he couldn't distinguish between his mind and the world that was surrounding him.

Cruising through the city, he tried not to interact with anyone as always. But no matter how hard he wanted to focus on his task, there were always some burning eyes on his skull.

At first he didn't mind, he wasn't really used to this kind of attention but he shrugged it off.

Maybe it was his sword or maybe it was the curse in his eyes.

However, as the weeks passed by, he felt more and more out of place. The pollution brought an itch inside his head, but those whispered comments brought headaches.

"Mind your own bussiness, freak"

Turning his head around, he looked over to where you hissed. It was almost comical to see you scolding a pretty big guy, his friends already about to either insult or laugh at you.

However, he stepped behind you before any of that.

He liked the way you always tried to defend him, always beefing with people whenever you heard those awful comments.

He felt somewhat protected

. . .

"You're taking a bath"

What?

He had dissociated from the conversation to the point that he was now aware of your hands prying off his armour.

At first he didn't enjoy those "cute little baths". He felt bad you were cleaning him up and he felt like a little child under your fingertips once again.

But the more your hands laid themselves on his bare body, cleaning him up, the more he leant into your touch.

So he let you handle him around

"Alright, let's start"

After that, your fingers started spreading soap around his scalp, his whole body submerged inside your hot tub.

He found it kind of silly that he had to lay down with his knees outside the water when you could spread them so they rested under it.

He loved those small details

With you he didn't feel naked and vulnerable, he felt finally at peace. He didn't know how much he actually needed your hands on him, but his body surely craved them.

Speaking of, they were currently rubbing soap on his chest, tracing a path until they latched themselves on his arms.

Curiosity spread around his mind whenever you would praise them, tell him how strong he had became over the years. Curiosity because he didn't see that much of a change, he was always like that, right?

But he didn't mind them, hell, he secretly flexed under your gaze so you could gawk at them.

Summer days whenever it was hot outside, glistening skin under the warm hues of the punishing sun. He was always weirdly lifting something heavy whenever you were around, a wooden box or some metal bar.

A secret attention whore

He let you play around with his fingers, eyes closed as he relaxed into the tub behind him. He liked the way your hand fit so perfectly with his own one.

Whenever you would drag him around the city, latching your fingers around his wrist as he followed close behind you.

Ever since the day he had met you, you seemed different.

He could crack a smile with you without the need of feeling embarrassed about it, let alone laugh at your stupid puns. He felt light-headed, and he really needed you after a long day.

That's why he always tried to get home as soon as possible when you weren't working too, he wanted ( needed ) to see you. The way his aching legs dragged themselves without any pain into your house.

But on days like this, his legs ached x2 times harder.

Why was he still alive after all that had happened?

Why did the Planet need him so badly?

Couldn't others replace his job?

Those questions flooded his mind again and again, like a snake that bit it's own tail.

He was become more and more confused about his surroundings, the past traumatic events still flashing lively through his tired eyes.

God he was tired.

And after all the times he had already told you that he was fine, just tired, that adjective seemed to have lost it's initial weight.

So tired.

The past, the nostalgia mixed with the sour taste of regret and bad decisions.

The present that still haunted him on lonely, endless nights.

The future he didn't even want to know that was awaiting for him.

As bad as it sounded, he had lost interest in the things he adored doing. He felt better when he was just breathing, sinking in your arms.

SOLDIER? he wasn't good enough to be one of them

Sep%#/<*@? It was better if he slowly forgot his name

However, it wasn't that easy.

No matter how far his legs had managed to take him, a long trail into some tall, enigmatic woods without a visible exit.

He was always following right behind him

And he didn't know how much time he had left until his face would be pushed into the dirt, a much stronger hand keeping him down.

. . .

"Cloud!"

White hair was replaced by your h/c locks, a warm waterfall of relief washed all over his body at your sight.

"Were you even listening to me?"

His body felt fuzzy and when he looked down he saw a towel wrapped around him, his legs sitting on the cold wc.

He looked back into your face, a cute pout resting on top of your brows as you waited for him to answer. Only to see that disgusting look of worry paint all over your pout instead.

He hated and despised that look in your face

He always blamed himself for making you feel like that, maybe he shouldn't have opened up as much as he did. Maybe he was being such a baby about all this.

He wanted to make you happy with him, cheerish him for the things he had done that day, admire him. Anything that didn't involve your pretty face coming down.

But, of course, he didn't know how to brighten it up.

His pupils remained connected with yours until he looked away, confused about what to do or to say.

But your hands suddendly wrapping his head in a warm cage of softness, kept him from thinking. A towel was ruffling his hair up, and he didn't mind anymore if it ended up messed.

He liked the feeling of someone finally taking care of him

And when you both finally winded down from the day, ready to rest on the comfortable bedding you had chosen, he felt as if someone was dragging him down into a puddle of confusion once again.

The worst part is that he didn't know how to swim back

"Sweetie"

She paused for a brief moment, her hands slowly lulling him back into an awake state.

"Honey?"

Mom?

"That's right, sweetie"

His eyes opened up, finally seeing the woman behind that familar voice.

"I missed you"

He couldn't believe he was back home, looking down he still saw his adult body. Well, and adult body that only hid childish maners.

He wanted to say that he missed her too, a lot actually. But no words seemed to seep out of his mouth, it felt like a nightmare.

Part of his childhood and teenage years passed by without her, a warmth he seemed to seek on cold nights, sneaking a hand around your waist. Whenever he saw other children with their mothers, teenagers that got angry at them, he wanted to feel that too.

Hell, he wanted to feel everything that he was deprived of. From the softness of her arms as she tucked him to sleep, to her honeyed voice as she sung making dinner.

His head still laid on his pillows and he could recall the coziness of it, it was the only thing about his past that he was sure was real.

"You've grown to be a good man huh?"

She kept talking, and he wanted nothing more to do other than hearing her voice for the last time.

"You've gotten really handsome too. . ."

Her hands took his arm, his mind now being aware of her presence as she sat on the bed, sinking a bit the mattress. Her fingertips dancing along the skin, trying to memorize all his muscles.

". . . and strong too"

A big smile was plastered on her face, looking at him as if he was a newborn again, getting ready to sleep for the first time after she had given birth to him.

"The ladies must be crazy for you"

And she wasn't wrong, they really were.

He got compliments almost every day in Midgar, from the honeygirls to some random ladies on the street. But it wasn't until his mother told him how pretty he actually was that he started believing it.

"I saw that girl, you're a lucky one"

Did she mean... you?

You were one of the few persons he knew he could trust, that could lend him a hand whenever he was feeling down.

He couldn't describe what he felt for you, but he definitely knew that if you happened to fall off a cliff, he would be there to catch you.

You had done so much already for him and yet without expecting the same amount of love and care for him. And he felt so bad about it, he wanted to return all of your hugs, cuddles, kisses and praises.

"She's the one"

And there you were, laying like a lonesome princess by his side. He could see your pacified breathing, it would always calm him down.

How had he gotten so lucky?

You seemed like a goddess under his gaze, and it was on nights like this he finally got to appreciate your beauty.

You could be sweating, with your hair all ruffled up after a workout that he still would've found you the prettiest woman alive.

You always told him how handsome he was, how his face was absolutely perfect as you forced him into wearing some kind of mask you would apply into your face shortly after too.

He loved you, he loved you, he loved you

His mind was racing at this point, he didn't even know where to look anymore. At your pretty eyes closed shut? At the way you were cutely laying on the bed with your arms hugging your chest? At your body under the mattress?

If he were to write down his favourite part about you, he wouldn't even know where to start.

However, when your eyes opened themselves slowly, he panicked.

Did he wake you up?

But he stayed still on spot, the warm blanket he didn't want to leave when he got up in the morning pooling bellow his stomach.

"Cloud?"

Stop.

He wished he had an audio recorded of your voice and listen to it whenever he had to sleep without you.

"What's wrong?"

Your eyelashes batted themselves, trying to wake your brain up as you searched his body under the dark light.

He soon felt your hand on his bare chest, finally able to look at him in the eyes. Which wasn't a complicated task as they were bright as the sun.

Your moon in dark nights

"Go back to sleep"

That was the fourth time you had heard him speak this afternoon, and it concerned you so much. He always listened to your stories and when he was in a good mood, he would never shut up.

He was a pleasant person to speak to, really, he had such beautiful words to say whenever he got philosophical. And he actually made you cry when he bashed out about his trauma.

But you just looked at him and without any words, your arms enveloped him like his mother. You knew he was comfortable like this, silence as your heartbeat slowly matched his own one perfectly.

And soon both of your bodies were laying on the mattress, your hands holding his head, pressing him further into your chest as he clinged to your back.

You told him the most sugary praises you could had ever thought about, lulling him back to sleep as his mind began clouding with sleep.

You could've sworn you felt something wet on your chest, but you didn't care, you were more than happy to finally see him express his feelings with you.

[freaksstar]

heeseung finds out about your little hobby hc (pt 1)!

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•´¯•. 🎀 ❤ 🎀 .•¯´•.🎀 ❤ 🎀 .•¯´•. 🎀 ❤ 🎀 .•´¯•. 🎀 ❤ 🎀 .•¯´•. 🎀 ❤ 🎀 .•¯´•

pairing: heeseung x fem!reader

wc: 798

genre: fluff

warnings: silly!!

a/n: i imagine this stuff happening when you guys are just like barely into your relationship lol. but!! im gonna make this a little mini series, and ill do one of these for each member, so expect jay's next!!

first post, enjoy!

↳ m.list for series

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you and heeseung share a pc in your apartment, and take shifts using it, because why wouldn't he let the love of his life use his most prized possession?

anyways, one day he comes back from practice with the boys late at night. and he sees you asleep at his desk with the faint glowing of the pc's screen illuminating your face, wrapped in one of his jackets!! he's like, wow, look, it's my adorable girlfriend!! she looks so angelic!!

so being the loving boyfriend he is he picks you up and puts you to bed with a smile, before running off to the shower to go freshen up.

after, when he comes back to your shared room, he takes a good few seconds to stare at his pc, and decides its a great time to hop on fort (me fr). who cares if its already 2 am?

and so he sits down in his gaming chair and clicks his mouse, the dim light of the pc screen brightening as a reaction to the sudden activity.

he's a bit slow because he's pretty tired, but after processing the black screen that is surely not fortnite's loading screen, rather lines of code, a small little smile of pride makes its way onto his face. he's so proud of you. he always will be.

his darling little dove, writing her own code! you've always been into coding, so he's ecstatic to have been able to come across the project.

now, heeseung is slightly educated in this field. listening to your little rambles about coding did teach him some important things after all. he goes through the code trying to figure out what you could be programming, before he realizes he can just check the project name! he seems to be getting slower by the minute, poor bby :(

and the title? "making a game for hee!"

his heart quite literally melts in that moment. it's an honor to have your hard work dedicated to him. he's always found your little hobby of coding endearing.

and what's even more adorable? the fact the the project dedicated to him is a game. you know he loves gaming, it's what he enjoys doing in the little downtime he gets, aside from doing things with you. even when he games, he finds a way to get you involved, like playing the game with him, or even just having you in his lap, the warmth emitting from you bringing him comfort he wishes he could spend all day feeling.

after a few seconds of falling in love all over again, all while staring at your sleeping figure on the bed, he decides to get some victory royals in, playing as quietly as possible to insure you don't wake up.

the next morning? he doesn't even mention it. the sweetheart realizes you probably want to surprise him with it, but he secretly checks your progress every night when he's sure you're soundly asleep.

and the day you drag him to the chair, tell him to cover his eyes, and surprise him with the game? his surprise is genuine. now heeseung was smart, yes, but he wasn't educated enough on the topic of coding to figure out how to run the program. he was already proud just by seeing your progress, the new lines of code being added to the project every night.

he plays that thing for hours. time for his weekly gaming session? you bet he's hopping on your game instead of fort. he's dedicated, and he wouldn't have it any other way.

once he finishes playing, he'll be begging you for another addition to the "dedicated to hee" series. you're so talented, could you blame the guy for wanting to play your games?

you'd never know how he's secretly so proud of you, how you're his pride and joy. how he brags to his friends, "yeah, my girlfriend codes games in her free time! she works so hard at her job and then makes games for me, she's my hardworking angel!"

if you did find out one day... he'd be shy for a couple of minutes, before stepping up and owning it. "well yeah, what'd you expect baby? you think your amazing skills would go unnoticed by my sharp eyesight?"

this is where you remind him that he actually wears glasses (he's amazingly attractive in them).

"they just help make my vision even better. that's how i found you... this!!" and he just pulls out the pastries you've been craving for months ever since your vacation to france.

and you're just like. baby??? where'd you get these??? i thought we could only find these in france??? and he's just like, told you, my vision's great.

you'll never find out where he got them from <3

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ty so much for reading!! mwah, love you guys <33

requests are open if you'd like to request hehe

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[slasher-male-wife]

Horror characters with an s/o in a band head canons

Sorry for barely posting. I say this every time I post but I've been very busy lately with a lot of stuff but I'm still trying to find time to write time for y'all. So for these head canons I'm just putting a blanket statement of the reader is in a rock band. Also I'm looking into writing for fem readers as I explore my own gender identity. But reader's gender isn't specified in this.

Includes: Corey Cunningham, Tiffany Valentine, Amanda Young, Billy Loomis, and Martin Mathias

Content includes: Possessive behavior, murder mentions, implied murder, mentions of saw traps in Amanda's section, brief 'stalking' mentions, not proof read

Corey Cunningham

Pre-Michael he's going to feel a little awkward going into a show that you're playing at. If you play something like shoe gaze or some kind of softer rock music he won't feel as awkward going into to see you preform but if you play harder rock or even metal he's going to feel very out of place.

Pre-Michael Corey would also try his hardest to learn about whatever instrument you play for the band or if you sing he'll try his best to learn about singing and the best way to do it without hurting your vocal cords. He'll do his research on what you do because he wants to be the best supportive boyfriend he can be.

Pre-Michael Corey won't really get jealous of people cheering you on or being supportive of your music. He understands that they just enjoy your music and they want to show their support for you. After all, he's the one who gets to go back stage with you and to all the practices. He's really the lucky one.

Post Michael however is a different story. Now he's more open to whatever music you play. Even if it's harder music like metal or some kind of hard/alternative rock he's down for it. I wouldn't say he'd get in a mosh pit or anything like that anytime soon.

When he's post Michael he'll still keep knowledge about whatever instrument you play or how to take care of you if you sing. He'll become a little obsessive about it, going with you to every band practice or he'll watch you from somewhere else while you practice. Same goes for when you're at home. If you don't want him there you won't know that he's there.

Post Michael Corey is also a little more protective when it comes to your fans. Now he knows that you won't have that many fans that push boundaries with you, but any that try to push boundaries with you on this are going to pay the price.

Tiffany Valentine

Tiffany (in my opinion) is a gothic rock, post punk, dark wave, other goth music genres kind of girl. So if you play any of those kinds of music genres she's more than happy to go to one of your shows and support you there.

She will happily tell anyone listening that her lovely s/o is in the band playing on stage and that you're super talented, and it doesn't matter if they care about it or not, she's proud of you and she cares.

She might not know much about music but I can promise you that she's going to try her best to help you with practicing whatever instrument you play or whatever you need help with that's music related.

If you want her to go to your band practices with you she's all for that. She's happy to sit in and listen to whatever you're working on, it's not like she's going to tell anyone what you're doing, she'd never do you dirty like that.

She WILL be dressing up for all of your shows. It doesn't matter how big or small they are she needs to represent you and how well you treat her. She also just really likes getting dressed up to go out and this is an excuse to do that.

If you have band merch she will also wear it. Even if it's just some shirt with your band name or logo on it then she'll wear it while she sleeps or some other time. She prefers more feminine clothes so she might go as far as to paint on your band name and or logo onto some old dress she has just for fun.

Amanda Young

Amanda is a metalhead plain and simple. She likes harder music and if you play harder music she'll be happy to go to your show. If you play slower music, she hopes you won't take offense, but she might not go to all of your shows.

She might not go to all of your shows anyway because she's busy with her jigsaw work but she'll try to see at least a couple of your shows every time you have some.

I feel like if you're stuck on lyrics or where to go with a song she'll be there to help you with it. She might not be the most knowledgeable on music but she's going to try her best to help you get out of that rut.

If you need a song name she'll suggest something based off a trap she's made or just a trap in general. "What about 'knob twister'?" "What about Venus Fly Trap?" But she'll be more subtle with it if you're unaware of her being a jigsaw apprentice.

She won't take any of the other apprentices to your shows, she'll honestly keep you pretty separate from her 'work life' outside of telling John about you. If any of them somehow find out about you and your band she will get very defensive of you and she will swear if Hoffman ever goes to one of your shows she's going to put him in a reverse bear trap.

She won't get super jealous of fans of your music unless they start pushing boundaries. She gets people being fans of your work and wanting to meet you and stuff, but if they end up getting a little too far 'into' your music she may or may not put them in a trap.

Billy Loomis

It's the 90's and just like look at him, he's probably going to be into that slower, more shoegaze kind of stuff, he's the og male manipulator in more ways than one.

He'll try to be open to the kind of music that you play but if it doesn't interest him he probably won't be going to every single one of your shows. He'll make up excuses about having to do stuff for school and whatever.

But don't get it twisted, if anyone tries to make fun of you for the kind of music you play they're gonna meet ghostface real soon. Just because he might not be into your music it doesn't mean that other people are allowed to be mean to you about it.

This also applies to fans of your band who try and get a little too close to you for Billy's comfort. He understands that you're going to have fans of your music but that doesn't mean people are going to just get away with being obsessed with you, that's his job god damn it!

But if he's being as possessive as he usually is he'll have Stu go to one of your shows for him just to check things out and make sure nothing bad is happening there. He doesn't think you're going to cheat on him, he trusts you, he just doesn't trust other guys, unless it's Stu.

He'll play down how much he really does care about your music. He tries to keep up this kind of 'whatever' 'cool guy' persona but he really does care about your music and he might stalk you a little bit and just watch you at your band practices for fun.

[viscerax]

Heyy!! Firstly, would just like to say your writing is so good! So hard to find good stuff for black phone characters. I haven’t seen much for Finney yet, so I was wondering if you could write something for him? Maybe where he’s getting bullied and reader stands up for him, but since she’s a girl they underestimate her and she ends up kicking their ass then asking him on a date and he’s just like 🧍🏻me? 😂 love to see me some strong female characters.

Fight For Me

Finney stood pressed against his locker, head down and trying to look as busy as possible as if he were searching for something inside, begging that whoever decided to make his day horrible would miss him or decide to spare him.

Unfortunately, this didn't work.

"Hey, Finney. What'cha doin there?" A strong hand grasped Finns shoulder, almost bruising him with how tight the grip was.

The hand spun Finney around to reveal noe other then Moose, one of Finns worse tormentors. "You've been awfully lucky lately. I haven't seen you around once in the past week. Seems like you're avoiding me."

Moose let out a dry laugh, sending tremors down Finney's spine. "J-just leave me alone. I don't want any trouble." Finney's voice was just barely above a whisper.

"Whats that? I couldn't hear you. Are you s-s-scared Finney?" Moose laughed and shoved Finney into the lockers, sending a loud tremor through the halls. Finney winced, trying to hold back any cries of distress. No, he had to look tough. "God, you're pathetic. You can't even stand up for yourself. Its almost like you like getting beat up, huh?" The taller boy put his left hand on Finneys other shoulder, pressing and holding him down against the locker.

One swift punch to the face was enough to make Finney feel lightheaded. A pounding pain went through his entire head, and he suddenly reached up to clutch his now bleeding nose.

Everyone in the halls at the time had started to form a crowd, cheering or gasping when Moose landed the first punch.

Moose pulled back his fist again and just as Finney expected to take another blow, a voice called out from among the crowd, which somehow managed to overpower the rest of the students. "Let go of him!"

Moose looked over to where the voice was coming from, and out from the crowd emerged none other then you, Y/n, Finneys knight in shining armor.

Moose just laughed, letting go of Finney and turning his attention to you. "And why should I? What are you gonna do about it? Cry? Tell the teacher? Oooh I'm so scared!" Moose walked closer to you, laughing so hard he could barely get his words out. "I suggest you apologize right now before you get yourself hurt, princess-"

He was cut off as you kicked him directly in the crotch, causing him to hunch over in pain. You took the opening and hit him with an uppercut. Moose groaned, and for a moment, you debated just leaving it there.

Then you decided you'd rather beat the shit out of him.

While Moose was doubled over, trying to regain his composure, you tackled him, knocking him over and proceeding to land as many blows as you could until he couldn't even get up anymore.

"Break it up! Break it up!" You heard a teacher call and you reluctantly got off of him. You felt proud of your work. Seeing him bloodied and beat on the floor, and everyone seeing him overpowered, by a girl no less, filled you with a sense of pride. To you, it didn't matter that you were a girl, you could still kick ass.

The teachers were pissed, but you got off with a light reprimanding and detention.

When the teachers were done with their lecture on how "a girl should be lady-like. And fighting is not lady-like" and how "you should've gotten a teacher" you looked around the school for the kid you had saved, Finney.

You had to admit, you hade a huge tiny crush on him. Who wouldn't? He was cute, and had a sweet smile, and soft hair, and he was a hell of a baseball player.

You were brought out of your thoughts when you saw that familiar head of shaggy hair in front of you.

"Hey! Finney!" You called out, chasing towards him. Everyone else was in class, and you were surprised to see him wandering the halls.

Out of reflex, Finney froze up, but he recognized that voice, and a bit of the tension left his body. He slowly turned to face you.

You were smiling widely as you approached him. Finney returned the smile, a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"Are you okay? That looks like it hurts." You were obviously referring to his still bleeding nose.

"Uh-uhm yeah. I'm fine. Nothing I'm not used to, y'know?" He chuckled and shrugged, but you still frowned. You grabbed onto his hand and started walking down the hall.

Finney looked at your hands, blushing madly. He just silently followed as you led him into a bathroom. Once you were in, you let go and walked over to the sink, grabbing a few paper towels and ushering him over.

You noticed the way he nervously looked around. "Don't worry. No one really ever comes in here. We won't get in trouble." You smiled and dabbed the wet paper towel under his nose, clearing up the blood. "Any other injuries?"

Finney quickly shook his head, and you threw the paper towel away, running your bloodied knuckles under the water. You gave him a warm smile when you were done, turning to face him.

"Hey, Finn?" You took a deep breath and decide do just face your fears.

"U-uh, yeah?" Finney looked just as nervous as you felt.

"Are you free, uhm, tommorow night? I wanted to go see Texas Chainsaw Massacre, would you care to join me?" You smiled and took a few steps so that you were closer to him. Finn took a deep breath and just stared at you, kind of dumbfounded.

"Uh-uhm I mean- i think I'm free- i uhm- are you sure?" You could tell he was trying to act cool about it, and miserably failing.

"Yeah, I'm sure, silly. Otherwise I wouldn't be asking." You giggled, and your laugh sent a warm shiver down his spine.

"Uhm yeah sure- I'm not busy. S-sounds fun. What time?" He nervously fidgeting with the sleeves of his sweater. You smiled and began walking past him and towards the door before stopping next to him.

"6 pm." You smiled and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Its a date, by the way."

A/N: I just realized that in a lot of my fics I use the someone getting hurt and someone treating their wounds trope and I'm sorry but like its literally one of my favorite tropes I can't help it anyways I hope you enjoyed </3

[wordsbyrian]

The Owl and The Lioness - Alessia Russo x Reader

Summary: Rugby player!R meets Alessia Russo and things go from there.

A/N: This is the fic I made you guys vote on me writing like a week ago. Also does anyone else feel like I'm writing these pretty fast because I have 3 other fics just waiting to be posted and a 4th in progress.

As a rugby player, you can honestly say that you do not spend much time thinking about football.

In all honesty, you can’t say that you’ve spent more than ten minutes thinking about it in the last 10 years, but that’s all about to change today.

Today, you along with the rest of England’s women's national rugby team are at St. George’s Park because apparently, it would look good if the Red Roses were seen supporting the Lionesses and vice versa before your major tournaments.

You’ve never been more uncomfortable than you are right now standing in front of these footballers in your training kit.

The two sets of captains and coaches are currently trying to figure out the best way to go about this faux joint training. They don’t take very long and before you know it, you and your fellow wings Jess, Ellie, and Lydia are standing with their strikers.

“I’m Beth. That’s Bethany, Nikita, and Alessia,” the newly identified Beth says.

“I’m Lydia and that’s Jess, Ellie, and Owl,” Lydia says, smirking as she purposely tries to wind you up by using your nickname.

“It’s Y/N,” you say, barely loud enough to be heard.

“Speak up Owl,” your teammates say at nearly the same time with identical eye rolls.

Taking a deep breath you try again, voice coming out at a normal volume, “My name is Y/N.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you can see Alessia give you a small grin, which you return despite the sound of blood rushing in your ears.

It’s then that the drills start and you find yourself silently showing her the correct way to pass a rugby ball and the correct way to tackle, chuckling softly as she and her three teammates struggle to bring you down.

In turn, she shows you how to do keepy-ups and how to use your laces to add some power to your shots.

The very last activity of the day is a foot race and it involves most of their team taking on the backs from yours.

“You’re all about to learn why we call her the Owl,” you hear Jess shout from somewhere down the line.

There’s a bit of laughter from your team and even a couple of ‘yeah rights’ from the footballers, but you’re not paying attention to any of that. Your eyes are locked onto the pole at the opposite end of the field, your finish for the race.

All you need is for their coach to blow the whistle and the second she does you’re gone.

Out of the corner of your eye, you can see that at least two of the footballers are slightly ahead of you but you’re not worried about that. 

Your only concern is beating your teammates, which you do by a lot. 

Upon turning around you see that most of the runners are still a good 15 meters back.

It doesn’t take very long before your teammates are circling you and ruffling your hair though.

“Way to fly Owl,” your captain shouts, hooking her arm around your shoulders, “Really did us proud little rose.”

“Thought I should show that we’re not all big brutes like you, boss,” you respond quietly, a small grin on your face.

She doesn’t find it as funny as you do though taking the opportunity to put you in a headlock.

You struggle against her for a while, not making any progress towards escaping until the coaches call the two teams back in front of them.

Neither of the coaches says anything important, not in your opinion anyway, and they release the two sides to mingle and get ready to go.

Not one for talking with people, you go to gather your stuff and are slightly surprised when a shadow appears above you.

Looking up, you're surprised to see one of the football players standing above you. You recognize her having seen her talking to Alessia earlier.

“Hey Owl, I’m Ella,” she says, “My idiot friend Alessia over there thinks that you’re cute but is too nervous to ask you for your number, so I’m doing it for her.”

“What,” you say confused, “You’re asking me for my number for your friend?”

“Yup.”

Shaking your head, you pull a piece of paper and a pen out of your bag before writing down your number, accompanied by both your name and nickname.

Handing it over, you ask Ella to deliver a message for you, cheeks flush with embarrassment.

“Tell her that I think she’s cute too.”

Over the next few months, you and Alessia spend a considerable amount of time texting and getting to know each other.

When United make their way down to London for games, you take her on dates and show her all of your favorite spots, and the few times your team makes their way to the Manchester area, she does the same.

This of course garners some teasing from your teammates, who have taken to reminding you that most owl species mate for life every time they see you leaving a room to talk to her on the phone.

It’s during one of these phone calls, a facetime to be specific, that her phone gets hijacked by Ella and Mary.

“‘Lo there Owl,” Ella says, accent strong as ever, “I was wondering if you could solve an argument for me.”

“I mean, maybe?”

“Do they call you Owl because you’re fast like a bird or,” Ella’s cut off by Mary snatching the phone away.

“Or because you’re really quiet,” the keeper finishes.

“It’s both,” you answer, “Most owl species can average speeds of 20 mph but they can fly faster in certain situations. The crazy thing is that despite going so fast they make very little noise, virtually silent in fact.

The look on the two players' faces causes you to grin a little because you know exactly why they’re those faces: they’ve never heard you say so many words at once before.

They manage to say as much before Less takes her phone back telling them to  “say bye to Owl.”

You smile a little more as the two others rush off, already arguing about something else.

“What are you doing next month,” she asks when they finally leave the room.

After thinking about it for a moment you answer her, “Season ends this week so probably some recovery work and injury prevention to prepare for the world cup and next season.”

“Do you want to come to some of our matches during the Euros?”

“Do you want me to come to your matches at the Euros,” you ask back, watching as her cheeks flush before she nods, “Well if you want me there, I’ll come.”

A smile breaks out on her face and the two of you continue your conversation. 

Although you can’t seem to get a clear answer from her about what she’ll be doing for the rest of the week, which is weird.

You do your best to not focus on it and by the time your championship game comes around you’ve forgotten all about her squirrelly behavior.

Then when the final whistle blows, you’re too caught up in your exhaustion and excitement to even remember anything that happened before the game started.

When the whistle blows, you drop to the ground not having the energy to celebrate winning the game and becoming a champion.

You aren’t sure how long you lay there before your teammates come and dogpile on top of you screaming about your performance.

You then find yourself being hauled to your feet by your scrumhalf, Jane, who immediately pulls you into a hug that takes you off your feet.

The smiles don’t leave any of your faces as you shake your opponents' hands. They don't leave when you get the medals put around your necks or when you raise the trophy or when you approach the crowd that hasn’t stopped screaming since the first whistle.

It’s then that you notice a head of blonde hair and bright blue eyes that you would recognize anywhere.

Rushing to the crowd, you climb the barrier meant to keep fans off the pitch, ignoring the shouts of security, and sprint to the person you’ve been looking forward to seeing for weeks.

Pulling her into a hug, you speak directly into her ear, “You said that you wouldn’t be able to make it.”

“I lied, you played great today, baby. Three tries, congrats champ.”

Your cheeks heat slightly at her praise, so instead of responding, you press a kiss to the top of her head, content to just stand there holding her.

Eventually, she pushes you away, sending you back to celebrate with your team.

“We’ll be switching places at the end of next month,” you tell her before walking away.

And you’re right because, on the last day of July, you’re standing in a sold-out Wembley watching as your girlfriend (recent development) and her idiot friends jump around singing Sweet Caroline.

She eventually makes her way over to where you're sitting with her family in the crowd, climbing to the barrier to get a hug.

“I’m proud of you,” you say directly in her ear, not caring about the number of cameras on you. In your mind, if she cared she wouldn’t have leapt into your arms the way she did, so you continue with your praise of her performance, “You played amazing all tournament, Less.”

“Thank you.”

She pulls away and you can see the cogs turning in her mind, her eyes repeatedly flickering to your lips before she surges forward to kiss you.

You both end up smiling into it as the cheers of the crowd around you get louder at the sight.

Pulling back, you smile at her some more before sending her back to the field to continue celebrating with her team.

Pulling your phone out you send her a text that you know she won’t see until much later tonight.

It reads: I can see the headlines now, England’s Superb Lioness and Their Speedy Owl, An Unexpected Power Couple?

[anantaru]

𝗦𝗨𝗖𝗞𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗛𝗜𝗠 𝗢𝗙𝗙 !

ꗃꠂꠥ sucking him off while he‘s writing a new song, 4nemo rockstar!au feat. kazuha x fem! reader

ꗃꠂꠥ warnings: nsfw

"Hmm, what do you think?" Kazuha questioned, his attention solely focused on the paper in his hand, scrunching up his eyes in deep concentration while lazily nibbling on the pencil which was held tightly between his fingers. "Oh!" kazuha suddenly beamed up slightly, "I forgot you can't reply!" grinning to himself before his gaze slowly retorted between his thighs where you were sucking him off so fucking nicely. Breathing through your nose and gagging over his cock, drool stained all over your cheeks and coating his dick with both spit and cum.

You can't even remember when exactly you started to pleasure him and how much time has already passed, panties long drenched with your own slick, maybe this time he'll actually please you too, stuff you full with his cock and praise you for once! your sloppy cunt could barely stop fluttering against nothing, so desperate to feel some friction, just something to get rid of the pain boiling in between your thighs. Kazuha could be a real meanie sometimes! because fuck, you were always so good to him, it wasn't fair, consistently making sure he's pleased with you and never disappointing him, ever!

"Hey!" he coos, unhurriedly placing his pencil next to him, reaching over to cup your face with his now free hand, "you're getting slower again silly!" his grip advanced towards the back of your head to push you down further against his length, not stopping before the tip of your nose hit his pelvis. Kazuha let out a broken moan at the feeling of your throat hitting the sensitive tip of his cock. The musky scent filling your nostrils, gagging against his girth while breathing out heavily through your nose. Kazuha smiled once he noticed how perfectly you accustomed to this new position, knowing it's more or less uncomfortable to you. "Just like that." he continues, "you're so good."

He threw his head back, swallowing hard once you began to pick up on pace again. But this time you wanted to try something different, maybe if you're sucking him off really good today he'll touch you a bit! It's been already so long since last time. With that being said, whenever you reached his tip, you slowly circled your warm tongue against the sensitive spot, making the male above you grit his teeth, yet you were able to pull out an angelic moan out of him regardless. He scrunched his eyes shut for a second, sliding his digits into the strands of your hair and pulling you down again, relishing in your tongue expertly wrapping around his shaft so fucking sinfully. He was more than pleased in seeing you take it so seriously now, slowly laying the paper in his hands on top of the coffee table next to him.

"Fuck, you look so beautiful stuffed with my cock." he grinned smugly once feeling your throat close against his tip at his words, humming at you approvingly. "Maybe i should write a song about you, hmm?" letting out a breathy laugh once you nodded hectically over his question. You wondered if he wanted to cum inside of you today, knowing him he'd love to paint your tongue with his seed again, the milky liquid running down your throat made you feel so full at all times, you hoped he'd bless you with it tonight!

The pace of your movements never faltering, you really wanted to make him come undone now, all kinds of liquids, both your spit and his cum drizzling from your mouth to your cheeks and staining your flushed out expression, including his pants which he didn't seem to mind, almost being proud of the splotches that were located all over his boxers.

Kazuha felt how close he was, the climax building deep inside his gut and spreading, it was only a matter of time until he'd release, now starting to fuck your throat The slightly uncomfortable feeling of his hard cock pushing deep inside your throat over and over again made you gag against his length in response, holding onto his thighs for some sort of balance as you let him use you to his hearts extent.

The way he sounded so fucking bitter and desperate to release now, so eager to plunge all of hid warm seed deep inside your throat and make you swallow it all accordingly and only for his eyes to witness and get off to, he was aching to see your fucked out face so badly. Finally feeling his legs twitch under your hands, his cock pulsating and spilling himself inside of you, cum dribbling past your mouth and blessing you with his white liquid, you couldn't be happier right now! He tasted so fucking good, not too sweet but with the right amount of bitterness to it.

"Fuck, fuck." he groaned out whiningly — voice cracking in response — the aftershocks of his orgasm made him see white, rutting against your mouth a few times before pulling himself out completely. "swallow." he coos now, his gaze almost perverted focused on your abused lips. You, of course, doing as he demanded and swallowing down his seed in one go, without leaving anything behind. Kazuha was panting heavily above you, his eyes crumped shut and head thrown back in ecstasy, still lost in his afterglow bliss you could never keep your eyes off. maybe.. after he properly came down from his high, he'll return the favor you &lt;3

ꗃꠂꠥ rockstar!au series.

do not! share, copy or repost my work. ✎ ©ANANTARU 2022

[crimswnred]

I've just gotten back home from work so I'm a little late to the party, however...

LITG SEASON 8: TEMPTING FATE — VOLUME 2: thoughts, concerns and prayers

first of all yesss more hair booooo paywall, fusebox get it together??? (at least they are pretty but again that's the bare minimum)

anyway, here's my girl with her new hair

why do all of the girls' nightwear look like I'm on a strip club and they're asking me if I want something to drink

it's so over for you Theo

honestly she's too good for him anyway

okay kiss challenge!!!! let me snog everyone

I don't want any more of that "peck" crap we want FULL ON SNOGS, TONGUE AND CHAOS

Jin: "Nap, then results?" Hamish would be so proud of him

okay, so you rate me EIGHT just so I feel like I have to pay to have one extra kiss, your game is a dirty as ever Fusebox

date time!!!! going with Jin ❤️

LMAO Jack is kinda funny

so sad to see a baddie doing too much to keep a man in love island 💔 Luna I'm so sorry you didn't deserve it your only crime was being coupled up with the one guy I want

oh. so about the terrace scene...

first of all, super sweet gem scene. it seemed like a super important one for it to be a gem scene though. so idk I'm a bit lost.

Jin is a walking red flag 😭 this boy is soooo gonna flip on me when the next hot girl shows up!! but let's enjoy the ride

and Luna... girl... was it ever that serious?

the award for worst outfit design goes to 👇

and the one for BEST outfit design goes to 👇

like wow wowza mmmhmm yeah! this man is hot hot HOT 🔥🔥🔥

I had to kiss him HE IS SO FINEEEEEEEEEEE

oh, Jack is kinda sweet... if he looked more like Lewie/Alex he would be favourite boy of the season for sureeee

keep the compliments coming, darling

I had to kiss him too. you know, to be polite.

but it was just a peck, tho

okay, NOW JIN!!!

having a spicy conversation with the guy I want to fuck and his currently girl isn't how I planned to spend my afternoon but here we go

"You're adventurous. You're fun to be around. And you'd make every sight even more beautiful", "Okay. Where's the punch line?", "There isn't one :)" OKAY GAG ME WITH THE WRITING

FUNNY BOY WHO'S A HISYORY NERD? OH OKAY!!!! BIG T??? NO IT'S BIG J!!!!!! JIMOTHY!!!

lmao Sophie mixing the boys up she's so me

Claudia is a real one let me tell you that

she's nice, she doesn't force herself upon us, she's polite, she give us all the tea, and she even help us to graft on the boys behind their girls' backs. like, THAT'S MY GIRL

and if Theo doesn't step up she will DEFINITELY be mine

TIME TO PICK MY BOY LET'S GOOOOOOOO

so sad to see Luna go, I really like her :/

lmao???????????

I TAKE BACK EVERY GOOD THING I SAID ABOUT JACK WTFFFF 😭😭😭😭

he was so out of pocket ?? what's your deal man, are you jealous I picked Jin instead of you? we kissed ONCE. be sooooooooo for real rn

okay Sophie you can join your boy in this bullshit he still cheated on you with me when you weren't looking (and he probably would do it again)

no. I won't forgive you?? you were basically calling me a whore back then and now you are SORRY? don't say something you'll regret later that's not cute.

and he's supposed to be serious?

anyway, stressful night over. time to go to bed with my babygirl Jin

BITS BITS BITS BITS

29 gems to go all the way? what is this?

they could've make the scene a little longer but they have gotten way better ever since the writers dropped the word crescendo

MR TYLER WHO ARE YOU?

still not 100% sure if I'm going with Jin or Oakley but I'm leaning towards Jin, I'm not gonna lie 😁 I did some stuff that will fuck me over on movie night if fusebox finally learnt how to code (which they prolly didn't so I guess I'm safe)

I really enjoyed this episode except for the part when Jack and Sophie went full on villain mode but if the narrative made sense all of the time it wouldn't be LITG, right?

anyway, let's see what this Tyler guy is about... see you all next week 🫶

[iciatheguardess]

Hiiii it’s meeee elsie

conflicted Elsie

Look, you know as well as I do that I love TAOCC to freaking death

but like

I may have to partially step away from it after the current arcs are over.

these goofy goobers took over my life for the last three-ish months, and while I’ve had an amazing time, it’s…caused me to neglect other parts of my life, and restrict myself more than I should when it comes to how I am on this site. I’ve stated my intention to try and branch out multiple times but I never go through with it because I just…I have things to write here! I can’t! And yeah it’s fun but sometimes I get hurt even if people don’t mean to, like, I’ve gotten legitimately ill from this once or twice.

But I feel like even trying to step away a bit is somehow abandoning all of you or betraying your trusts. I want to stay friends with you guys, but my actual life and Irlsie has to come first most of the time, because I am not JUST Elsie, if that makes any sense. Elsewhere is and was always meant to be a sona for some interaction, maybe some friendos, but nothing this…involved, because I can’t put all of my social effort onto the internet because no matter what I do, the internet is not a completely genuine place, and I’ve accepted that. There are some parts of my personality I just don’t use. You don’t really ever see calm Elsie or mental illness Elsie or sappy Elsie, maybe once or twice, and that’s intentional. This is Writing Elsie’s blog, lol, but there’s other Elsie that needs to be allowed to exist outside of the internet, and I can’t neglect her or my actual life for the sake of this.

I honestly don’t know what to do here. I love these characters on a very personal level, and have poured my heart into them, and I don’t want to straight up leave them. Even only partially separating myself seems kinda pointless because I know what happens when someone gets really behind on the lore and has to be caught up on even just a day’s events to explain why Character A looks like this now or Character B is referencing this event, etc. etc.

But there’s a point where it’s not healthy anymore. Where things reach a place where I have to admit that this can’t be my entire life anymore. And I’m not entirely sure what on earth I should do about it…

If I do somewhat step back, it’ll probably be right after the vacation arc ends. i’m gonna pour my fluff loving heart and soul into that thing, don’t you worry. But you shouldn’t expect another dungeon or something like that from me unless I have a VERY good reason and a well formulated plan. Yes, I’ll probably still engage in shippery and fluff, as well as analysis, but mostly within the bounds of characters and dynamics we’ve already established, and not much farther than that. My one exception to the “after the vacation arc” rule would probably be Yelena’s arc, because of how long things in that section tend to take, for various reasons. Yelena’s arc is barely started, and stuff takes possibly days to move even a few hours in-universe. Sooooo….yeah, I wanna finish that, I’ve put too much work into it already to just stop it.

…dang this was only supposed to be a paragraph…

…pls halp, I have no idea what to do lol.

Ok. I've read over this a couple times.

First off, I'm talking to you as L here, and not Star. I am very, very proud of you for acknowledging this and understanding that this is getting unhealthy. I think it's very smart that you dont want to neglect your yourself irl and the fact you're saying this, and saying exactly what you'll be doing, I'm really proud of it.

To give you a clear answer, if it's going to help you irl then I think stepping back is smart. Especially from the trauma and angst, because that stuff hurts a LOT and it can be really, really detrimental and negatively affect irl things. What I DONT think is that it's betraying anyone. You need to be able to put yourself and your needs first in order to be your best self, and everyone understands that you can't be on tumblr 24/7 because, well, that's really really really really unhealthy and not good. I'm really glad you're telling me about this though so I, and everyone else who sees this, knows.

TAOCC is really great but there's a LOT of heavy things on here and with everything going on, it can be super weighing and really affect people irl. I can speak from experience because honestly, I'm in a similar situation. I won't speak much about that though. It's definitely addictive and can get really really unhealthy if you let it, and honestly it's not hard to let it.

I want you to do whatever you feel is best for you, no matter what that entails. Fei and Tails and Xeya and Kumo and so many others and I love you so much and do NOT want you neglecting yourself and your life irl for this- it's meant to be entertainment, not a lifestyle.

I think it's smart to finish Yelena's Arc before partially stepping back. And I think it's even smarter to not want to do another dungeon, because that whole thing was a massive angst-fest and I think it negatively affected people more than they care to admit. Shippery and fluff and minor things is a good boundary.

I'll wrap this up now, but again, I'm in full support of this decision because I want you to be at your best. You're right, you're not just Elsie. And it's not fair for you to only be Elsie when you're so much more than that. If stepping away from tumblr will help you take care of the other parts of your life that we aren't involved in or aware of, then please do so because no part of you and your life should be sacrificed for the sake of entertainment.

Again, I'm really, really proud of you for admitting this.

Please know we'll always support you and you're super important to all of us, so don't ever feel bad for putting your needs first. Irl things should always come first.

But no matter what always remember:

WE LOVE YOU SO SO SO MUCH AND YOURE SUPER IMPORTANT AND WE WANT THE BEST FOR YOUUU ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Everything I said is applicable for everyone else reading this too. Taocc is fantastic and we love it but it shouldn't completely take over your life. It's okay to take a break or step back fully if it means the best for your health and irl life. Please remember to take care of yourselves- and everything that Elsie talked about here is FANTASTIC self care. It may be hard, but it's also the best decision she can make for herself and may be the best decision for others too.

Alright- I think I covered everything. Don't ever feel like you're betraying us Elsie- it's not betrayal, it's self care. We'll still be here for you, always. Never forget that ❤️❤️❤️

[onlyhereforturtles]

Ok, so many months ago I wrote a fic about the 2003 turtles (my favorite boys) that was inspired by @/beebopurr's lighthouse au. I've been sitting on it ever since I wrote it both because I hate editing my own stuff, but also because I haven't really had the time or motivation to do it. However, I've finally sat down to edit it and it's almost ready, and I'd like to post it here. I've been continuously (almost daily) stretching my writing muscles ever since I wrote this, and have improved quite a bit since then. So when I look at this fic now, I feel it's kinda....weak and lacking. But I don't really wanna change it much. I'm still really proud of it, and I wanna post it.

So, I wanted to ask, (whoever happens to see this), if I should post it all at once or if I should post it chapter by chapter. If you're interested, that is. Once a week, because otherwise I'd post one a day. It has six chapters, and they're not super long. The whole thing is about 30,000 words, with roughly 2-8,000 words per chapter (guestimation). It will be posted on my AO3 as well as my writing blog @maybelinefox .

Warning: there is an underlying message in the story revolving around trust, and the use of guns and other weapons is a method of portraying that message. If you don't like guns or violence, (there's barely any violence but a dude does get his arm blown off by an overpowered gun), this fic is not for you.

Thank you to any who read this far and decide to answer! 😊 I'm mainly putting this here as incentive to finally finish editing the darn thing.

[braxlrose]

Hello! I really like your writing and I was wondering if I could request a bill x reader? It's where reader had a very rough childhood, with parents and stuff so they dont have a really good picture of love and gets confused about little nice things Bill does for them, like comforting and just being a good boyfriend, and can sometimes be like emotionally unavailable? But they really try with Bill and, yeah! Lmao, you don't have to do this and feel free to ignore!

omggg you're literally one of my favorite writers and I love this request because I really like writing angst bc there's so much emotion so ty <3

Also this is not proof read

cw: mentions of abuse (physical and verbal), angst, tell me if I missed anything pls!

Growing up was hard for you. Your father was barely ever around and when he was, he was completely hammered. You tried to stay away from him when he was like that, but it was hard considering you lived in the same house and he was always getting fired from jobs. Whenever you angered him, he'd take off his belt and beat you until you were sobbing. Then would pass out on the couch and act like nothing was wrong when he woke up.

On the other hand, your mother just never seemed to be happy with you. Always nit-picking on everything you did, the way you looked, the way you did your hair, your style, the way you talked, you were either too skinny or too fat; you just couldn't do anything right in her eyes.

You always tried your best to make them happy, just having the smallest glimmer of hope that they'd be proud of you for something. All your hard work at school or everything you did for your community. All the diets you went on for your mother. Cleaning up after your father. There was just nothing you could do.

You didn't understand why they were like this. Why did they have a child in the first place if all you did was "ruin their lives". You didn't understand love at all. Your mother said that she only does this because she cares about you, but if she cared wouldn't she want you to be yourself? No, of course not. You're either like her, or nothing. And that was that.

***

Then you moved to Magdeburg, Germany. Your mother was sick of her old apartment and your father was banned from all the alcohol stores in your town, so you had to move. Again. This wasn't the first time. You've moved 4 times in the past year because of your parents, you haven't lived anywhere long enough to make any friends.

You had moved into a small village and your mother was making you go over to the neighbour's for dinner. Your father was passed out somewhere so it was just you and her. She put your hair in a high ponytail and added "cute little pink bows". She always pulled too hard on your hair when she did it. You weren't allowed to leave the house unless you put on the pink, frilly dress she got you. You had to be "perfect" and "lady-like" or else no one would like you.

You slipped on your shoes and got pushed out the door by your mother. She had also plastered your face in makeup. Mascara, eyeshadow, lipgloss, all of that. You were fifteen years old for God sakes, why did she care so much?!

"You better not make me look bad in front of our new neighbour's, got it? I don't need your running your mouth like always." You nodded your head as she smacked the back of it, making you flinch before knocking on the door. You heard footsteps coming quickly to the door before a blonde woman opened up. A smile crept onto her face as she saw us.

(Its changing from third person to first person now!)

"Oh come in! Come in!" She said to us with a big smile on her face, ushering us in. My mother pushed me into the house, with a smile. The woman in front of us leaned down and waved, "Hi! You must be y/n! It's so nice to meet you!" I froze. What was I supposed to say? What if she got mad at my tone? What if I said something wrong? What if- I looked up as my mother nudged me on the arm, glaring into my eyes. don't be rude. she didn't even have to say anything for me to understand.

"Nice to meet you too!" I said to her, trying to smile but it just ended looking uncomfortable and awkward. She stood back up to her normal height and turned around, waving us towards the living room.

"Boys! Come down here to meet our new neighbours!" The woman shouted up the stairs as me and my mother sat down on the couch. She swatted my arm again.

"Stand up straight. Your going to make me look like a bad mother!" She whispered to me, giving me that icy cold glare she can never seem to get rid of whenever she looks at me.

Just then, two boys came stumbling down the stairs. They were obviously twins but looked very different from eachother. I turned my body back around when I heard then coming into the living room. I straightened out my back and looked at them with wide eyes.

"Woah, a girl." The mophead whispered. Tch, mophead. That's what he looked like. His dreads were all over the place.

"This is Mrs. y/l/n and y/n. They moved here today. Why don't you boys show y/n around the house?" They both nodded and smiled at me. This is where it all began. My friendship with Tom and Bill Kaulitz. It's been about 4 months since then and we all became good friends really quickly.

***

Me and Bill were walking through the park while tom was out doing God-knows-what. It was December already, so it had gotten really cold. We walked on some trails before Bill stopped us.

"What are you doing?" I asked, as he bent down on his feet.

"Tying your boots. You're gonna trip on them." My eyes widened as he leaned down. I'm just a fucking idiot I didn't even notice my shoelaces were untied. Who the fuck doesn't know that? Why didn't I realize? Am I actually that stupid? I could hear my mother's voice pounding in my head.

"Oh no! You don't have to do that, it's fine really! I'm just stupid, it's f-" he covered my mouth as he got it.

"Relax, I'm already done and I don't mind. Wouldn't want my favorite neighbour to fall face first into snow." He laughed and kept walking. Why'd he do that? He should've just told me to do it on my own, right? I don't need anybody to do anything for me. He should've just left it alone! What the fuck is wrong with hi-

"Hey are you thirsty?" What? What was he saying? I looked over at him when he stopped. We were back in town now, I hadn't even noticed.

"Hello?" He waved his hand in front of my face.

"Uhm..what?" I asked with a blank expression on my face. What was he saying? Why was he even asking me instead of just telling me? Isn't that easier?

"I said are you thirsty? There's a place just down the road that sells the best hot chocolate, you'll love it!" He said, grabbing my hand to bring me down the road. He wanted to get me hot chocolate?

"I don't have any money, Bill." He looked back at me and laughed.

"I'm buying, dummy. Why would I offer you something and then make you buy it? I'm not that awful." He joked, keeping my hand firmly in his. What. He wants to buy me something?

"You don't need to do that bill. I don't want to be a burden-" I sputtered out, not wanting him to do something he'd regret before he interrupted me.

"Burden?! You?" He stopped walking again and pulled me closer. Our faces were only a couple inches apart now and my hands were in his. "Y/n, you're my girlfriend. If I wanna buy my girlfriend a hot chocolate I'm gonna buy my girlfriend a hot chocolate, 'kay?" I was stunned. I don't understand why he's like this. He's too nice, people are gonna take advantage of that. Nevertheless, I nodded and walked down to where they were selling hot chocolate. Bill made sure to put extra marshmallows on mine. Why was he treating me like this?

We arrived back at his house and he pulled me down onto his bed with him.

"Jesus christ! Your hands are freezing, why didn't you say something." My hands? I guess they're cold. I hadn't noticed. Maybe they had gone numb half way through and that's why. Why did Bill care, they'd warm back up with time.

"It's no big deal Bill, I'll survive.." his eyes went wide like I had two heads.

"Are you insane?! No way!" He grabbed my hands and pulled me closer to him. He rubbed his hands onto mine and wrapped mine tightly in his. "Can't have your fingers falling off. I need someone's hand to hold." I smiled at me and wrapped the blanket around me. I laid my head down on his pillow and closed my eyes. My life wasn't supposed to be like this. I wasn't supposed to have a perfect boyfriend who gets me hot chocolate or warms up my hands for me. I don't deserve this. You don't deserve this. She was back again. She's always there. My mother sitting in the back of my head like there's a throne waiting there for her. Why were her words stuck in me like glue. I'm sick of her constantly belittling me like I'm nothing. But I am. I am nothing. Nothing at all. Just a useless soul that needed to fill an empty body and nothing mor-

"Y/n! Wake up! Are you okay?" Huh..? What was happening? I turned my head and looked outside. It was pitch black out. Had I fallen asleep? I turned back to bill and he looked like he was on the verge of tears. He had shaken me awake from my slumber. "Are. You. Okay?" He asked again, "you were mumbling and crying in your sleep. Did you have a bad dream?" I was crying? My finger tips reached up towards my cheeks. They were wet. I guess I was crying.

"I'm fine, bill. It was nothing." I mumbled and laid back down. His mouth was slightly agape as he crawled closer to me and engulfed me into a hug. He laid kisses all over my face. Why? Why does he care?

"You're not fine, and it's okay to be not fine! Just tell me what's wrong and let me help you!" He said to me as both of his hands caressed my cheeks. Help..me? Like I'm some charity case that needs fixing? I didn't need to be fixed. Yeah maybe I'm not perfect to my mother and maybe I have some fucked up issues but I don't need to be fixed. What the fuck was his problem?! Doesn't he understand I'm perfectly fucking fine!

"I said, I'm fine!" I shouted at him, shoving bill away from me and pushing myself off the bed. I'm perfectly fine and I don't need him telling me what's wrong with me. His head hit the wall by his bed and I could hear a crack. I broke his wall. I don't care. That's his fault. He should've backed off.

I heard him calling out my name along with a couple cries in between. I pulled on my shoes and stormed out the door. I don't need him or anybody or anything! I don't need him treating me like I'm some child who can't control her emotions!

That was 2 weeks ago. I hadn't spoken or even looked at him in two weeks. What was wrong with me? I hurt the only boy who's ever loved me. He probably hates me now. I'm the worst girlfriend in the entire world. Im the stupidest person. You're the most dumb, ugly, disgusting daughter who has ever been seen on this earth.

she's back.

I'm fucked up in the head and I don't know how to fix it. I want to blame my mother and father but it's not their fault, right? They care about me. It's my fault I'm like this. I don't know what I did to deserve this, but I have no one to blame but myself...right?

I was stuck sitting down in a chair while my mother poured goopy foundation onto my skin. We had to go to some classy town thing and I had to actually "look like a girl".

"Maybe if you were naturally beautiful I wouldn't have to waste my time doing this."

"Sorry mama..it's not my fault though..." She glared down at me and smacked the back of my head.

"You're lucky you have foundation on or I would've smacked the shit out of this disgusting face." She gritted between her teeth. Her words were like an awful, greasy poison dripping from her tongue. I hadn't done anything and some how I had made her mad again.

She shoved me into a long, cream colored dress and turned on the ignition. I leaned my head against the side of the door as we drove. Why couldn't I just be the normal, beautiful daughter my mother wanted? If there was a God, he had some serious explaining to do.

"Stop slouching! You think I want a daughter with bad posture?! My god! Can't you do anything right?" The speech. I've heard it a million times since I learned how to talk. How I can't do anything right and I'm just some failure who should've been aborted fifteen years ago. How I ruined my mother's life and how she was going to be a star if it wasn't for me.

It was a long car ride but we finally got there. And the event was even worse. There were so many people and the music was way to loud. I felt like crying. My hands were shaking and I couldn't stop picking at my nails. Women kept coming up and taking to me with their children. Friends of my mothers. I could guess by their judging stares. I looked lady-like and had good posture and was smiling. Why was I being judged, what am I doing wrong again? Why can't I just be normal? A normal girl who doesn't fuck everything up. Doesn't make her parents hate her. Doesn't ruin her parents lives. Doesn't make people feel awkward. Doesn't hurt their boyfriends.

And that was my breaking point. Tears flooded down my cheeks and everybody was staring at me. I stumbled away into another room and sobbed on the floor. I couldn't breathe. My hands hurt from picking at my nails and my face hurt and my body hurt and my eyes were burning and my makeup was surely ruined.

Everything is. I always ruin everything. What the fuck is wrong with me?! The one person who truly cared about me...i..I haven't- I hiccups against the wall and bawled my eyes out. The one person who truly, actually cared about me...I haven't talked to him in two weeks. Then I caught my breath. I stood up and wobbled to the nearest window. I pulled myself out of it and stumbled outside. My whole body hurt so I probably ooked crazy. I could feel mascara was running down my cheeks as I walked through the town.

My arms were freezing cold and I still felt like everybody was watching me. Their beady and judgy eyes staring me down like I was about to go crazy. Well, I guess technically they were right. I just started sobbing in front of everybody so I probably did look insane. You looked insane! What the fuck is wrong with you?! Can't you just act like a girl for once!? That's what my mother said me to in the 3rd grade after a play we did..

I finally got back to my house and looked up to the neighbour's house. Bills house. The light was on in his bedroom. He was awake. I turned back to my door and took a deep breath. I had to say something to him. Right? I had to make him believe I wasn't some crazy person who would push everybody away. Maybe that's what I was though..

I knocked on the door but nobody answered, so I stepped into their house. It was completely dark as I stumbled up the stairs to bills room. I looked at all the happy family pictures they had. God they were so lucky. So lucky to have a perfect family. A father and mother who love them. Having a twin must be great, it's like having a bestfriend for life, right?

As I stepped up the stairs I heard the door open. Bill must've heard me coming up. When he slowly looked around the corner I saw his eyes widen at my awful state. I guess I should've cleaned myself up first, I look a mess. My dress was torn from crawling out the window and my makeup was obviously smeared. I bet my hair wasn't too pretty either.

"Holy shit, y/n?!" He came down the stairs quickly and grabbed my arms, helping me up the stairs, "what happened?! You look...awful."

He sat me down on his bed and I didn't know what to say. I just stared at him. This perfect guy who loves me. I tried to open my mouth and say something but nothing came out. I guess he could tell I wasn't sure what to say because he went to the bathroom and grabbed some wipes.

"Here.." he kneeled down and began to wipe my makeup off. Tears slipped past my waterline as he comforted me. He just sat there looking up at me with a pity smile on his face as he cleaned me up. He took of my hands in his other hand and held it. He really was perfect. He saw him grab some lotion off his desk and rub it around my face after he wiped everything off.

"Come on, why don't we get you into some comfortable clothes okay?" I nodded at him and toyed with my fingers as he picked out some clothes.

I was laying in his arms now. His fingers were combing though my hair as I laid on his chest. I wasn't sure why he was doing this. Any sane person would've just kicked me out, right? I held onto bill tighter whenever he kissed my head and my cheeks. I cuddled up closer to him and nuzzled into his neck.

"I love you, y/n.." bill whispered as I dosed off into my sleep, breathing in his comforting scent and letting tears fall on his skin because he was the only person who was able to make me feel at home.

OKAY THIS TOOK ME LIKE 2 HOURS AND IT ALMOST GOT DELETED BUT THANK GOD IT DIDNT, I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS!!

the end felt kinda rushed but I hope it was still good

taglist: @hearts4kaulitz @burntb4bydoll @spelaelamela @bored0writer @fishinaband @billsleftnutt @dead-tapes @tokiiohot @bluepoptartwithsprinkles @saumspam

[ndcultureis]

I swear I keep writing these without intent to be vents but it always escalates. Anyway vent warning

ND (ADHD for me, or at least I think this is an ADHD thing?? Might be completely wrong though) culture is needing positive attention more often than you get it. I know I was suppose to do this thing and me actually doing it is "the bare minimum" and "I dont deserve praise for doing what I've been told" but please give me praise I need it if you dont give me praise it feels like you dont recognize this was a hard thing for me to do. Surely you know this was a hard thing for me to do, I've told you it was and you know how this works with executive dysfunction and stuff you're my parent and you've looked into so stuff about ADHD and autism so why are you still not giving me praise? It hurts :(

Also I'm a creative (digital drawing) and i dont mind this if i dont like my art piece but if I do how dare you not tell me my art is the best thing youve ever seen how dare you not scream and shout excitedly about how beautiful my art is. Why arent you giving me attention I need the attention >:(

Why is attention seeker a bad thing? I'm hurt that I didnt get enough attention, it hurts, of course I want attention of course im going to seek for attention of course im gonna fish for compliments its hurts to not get as much attention as i wanted

It hurts so much why arent you giving me attention??? please?? why arent you praising me???

I completed 2 subjects in my online school on monday and i only got told "good job" like??? WHY ISNT ANYONE TELLING ME HOW HAPPY AND PROUD THEY ARE OF ME COMPLETING 2 WHOLE SUBJECTS ON THE FIRST DAY OF THE WEEK??? YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO TELL ME YOU'RE VERY PROUD OF ME YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO SHOW HAPPINESS THAT I DID THIS THING WHY DO YOU NOT CARE WHY DO YOU NOT CARE????

And then I desperately want to ask, beg, for attention when I dont get enough but I stop myself most of the time. Not because I dont think I'm in the right to ask for the attention but because I'm worried others will find me annoying and hate me

(I feel like this might be something more than just ADHD but I cant tell. I dont really fit anything for NPD other than the attention thing and I dont know much about HPD. All I know is people arent giving me the attention I need to be satisfied and it sets off my RSD)

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