#by small i mean 2k maybe and by massive i mean is that a five digit number

[xiaoluclair]

.

[authenticmiya]

Pinky Promise - Hawk x Reader

Summary - Part 2 of Punching Bag. After all of this lost time, can the reader come to terms with the bad past she has with Hawk? Can they redeem what they had?

Words - 2k

Warnings - angst

Hawk pulled into the driveway of his house, the house you hadn’t been in for what felt like a lifetime ago. His moms car was gone, meaning it really was just the two of you.

“I bet my hair looks a mess right now.” You sighed, handing the helmet back over.

“Not as much of a mess as your knuckles, come on, let’s get you sorted.” The two of you walked towards the front door.

“Shit, I haven’t got my keys.” Hawk tapped on his pockets repeatedly, hoping they were in there.

“Under the statue of the Dalmatian.” You told him and his eyes creased together in confusion.

“Your mom always left a spare key under the Dalmatian.” Hawk was shocked that you had even remembered that.

“Don’t be surprised, the amount of times you used to lock us out, it’s hard to forget.” Hawk didn’t know how to feel. You didn’t want help, so why were you helping him?

“As much as it pains me to say, my hand is stinging like a bitch.” You admitted.

“Right, right.” He muttered, lifting the statue up and of course finding the spare keys. When he opened the door, you were hit with nostalgia.

“Nothings really changed in here.” Hawk watched as you took in everything.

“Last time I was here, you slammed the door in my face.” Hawk swallowed the lump in his throat. That night was the some what end of your friendship together. It wasn’t his transition into Hawk, it was who he became when he was Hawk.

“I shouldn’t have let you leave like that Y/N-“ He began.

“But you did and we both said some hurtful shit.” Hawk nodded and allowed you to follow him into the kitchen.

“There is no way your mom still has this on the fridge.” You gasped at the picture of you and Eli at Golf N Stuff when you were both five.

“You beat my ass at Golf every-time we went there.” He chuckled and a small smile formed on your lips. Noticing he had got the first aid kit out, you perched yourself on the counter.

“This is gonna sting like a bitch.” Hawk prepared you as he wiped away the blood and applied some anti-septic over the cuts.

“That’s the first thing you’ve been right about in months.” Your sarcastic, rude remarks were expected and Hawk took them. He couldn’t exactly say you were wrong, because the only thing coming out of your mouth, was the truth. Wrapping a small amount of bandage over the wounds, Hawk was finished being your doctor.

“Thank-you.” You said, before hopping off of the counter and heading towards the front door.

“Not so fast Y/N, I said once I finished with your knuckles, you and I were talking.” Hawk stopped you.

“I’m not gonna talk to you if you’re gonna be an asshole about it.” You snapped.

“Okay I’m sorry, please can we just talk? No arguing, no nothing, just a conversation.” You chewed the inside of your mouth and hesitantly nodded.

“What happened that night, Y/N I can never forgive myself. I have this whole badass reputation you know? It’s not an excuse, it never was and it will never be. I never should’ve let that take over what we could’ve had.” Hawk told you once the two of you had sat down on the couch.

“What we could’ve had? Are you serious? Eli, Hawk, whatever you wanna be fucking called. You and I were best friends. I mean the best of friends throughout our entire childhoods. We were each-others rocks when it came to the bullying, nah scratch that, you, me and Demetri.” He knew you were trying to pick a fight, but he wasn’t going to give a reaction. He was the one who done dirty, and now he was coming to his senses.

“I shouldn’t have let it come to any of that, we were meant to rise to the top together.” Hawk frowned, now noticing how sad you felt.

“If what you are now, is at the top, I wanna stay at rock bottom.” You told him with a sigh.

“I can’t change what I’ve done to you Y/N or Demetri, I can’t do anything about what I’ve already done. But I can try and avoid it from happening again.” Hawk tried to hold your hand but you shrugged him off.

“You know when mom left me all them years ago? I thought I felt heartbreak for the first time, but when you knew what you were doing to us.” You referred to yourself and Demetri.

“That’s when I felt heartbreak. Knowing you thought it was alright to become the bully. Them nerds? Them nerds you were once apart of. You were in their shoes, and now you’ve put them in the position that nobody should have to go through. At first you though it was badass, but now, you’re a massive dick.” You ranted.

“It’s taken you this long. It’s taken me getting a few cuts for you to realise you were in the wrong this entire time?” Hawk felt like he could cry, he done you so dirty.

“Y/N please-“ It took him every ounce not to just break down in tears in front of you.

“I had no one to go to.” A tear slipped out of your eye and Hawk felt his whole world come crashing down on him.

“I mean I had Demetri, but you know how awkward he gets. You’re the one who would sit there for hours on hours to listen to me and understand my problems, and when you left, I had no one.” You confessed.

“Sure I had Miguel but he was always busy with Karate and Sam, and yeah I guess you could say Johnny is a father figure in my life, but I wasn’t with him everyday like I was with you.” You sniffled, wiping away at the tears that kept building up.

“I have enough money in my bank account to support my bills for maybe half a month. Once my money goes, I’ve lost everything.”

“No you haven’t. Don’t ever fucking say that. You have me. Y/N, you will always have me.” Hawk couldn’t stress that enough but his actions hadn’t really made that clear in the past.

“So that’s it yeah? I let you back in my life and suddenly I have to trust you not to leave? Not to slam the door in my face? Not to drop me like a bag of potatoes again?” You questioned him.

“I needed you and you weren’t there.” You frustratedly disclosed with him.

“I wasn’t there when I had to be. I’ve got so much lost time to make up for, that’s if you’ll let me. I know I wasn’t there, and that is really suffocating me with regret. You did everything for me Y/N. You never left my side, even when all the popular girls wanted to be your friend, you shook them off and stuck by me. I treated you like shit and I’m so sorry.” Now this was the side of Eli that you hadn’t been familiar with for a very, very long time.

“I guess it’s true what they say when you don’t know what you have until it’s gone, right?” You asked him.

“That quote is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life.” From then it was silence. It didn’t feel awkward, yet it just didn’t feel peaceful either.

“I’m willing to forgive this, to try and come to terms with the new you just as long as you promise me one thing-“ Before you could finish the sentence, the front door opened and shut.

“Honey are you home?” Hawks mom called out, and your eyes widened. You hadn’t seen his mom in forever.

“Eli?” She went to call again, but stopped dead in her tracks when she realised you were sat next to him.

“Well god have mercy on me, Y/N? What are you doing here?” She excitedly rushed over and embraced you. The women who was there for every bullshit excuse your ‘parents’ had. It was your turn to feel bad now, because when you lost Eli, you hardly ever spoke to his mom.

“Hi Momma M.” You smiled as the hug lasted as long as it possibly could.

“I can’t believe you’re here! How are you? How’s your dad?” She asked and you gulped.

“I’m okay, he kinda up and left, got married to a women in Dubai.” You told her.

“He’s always been such a goddam slime ball.” She scoffed, quickly brushing that off and letting her calm demeanour take over. It seemed that everyone you knew, had the exact same opinion on your ‘dad’, even before you knew he was going to be permanently out of your life.

“Don’t worry, I beat the crap out of a punching bag.” Your comment made her chuckle, but that would never stop her from worrying about you.

“I’m not gonna ask questions as to why you two are even in the same room right now, but I’d really appreciate if you stayed long enough for us to have a chat Y/N. You’re a good kid, like the daughter I never had. I’ve missed you.” She smiled.

“Don’t worry, let’s go have a catch-up.” She brought you through to the kitchen and poured you a cold orange juice, leaving Hawk to wander about in his feelings in the living room.

“I know what happened between you two.” She began and you chuckled.

“Thought you weren’t gonna ask questions Momma M.” You took a sip of your drink with a slight smirk.

“Not in front of him, this is strictly girl talk.” She pointed out.

“Eli’s transformation was obviously a huge shock, and although I don’t agree with his actions, he’s still my baby, and I had to get used to everything he was doing. I let him do his own thing you know? Try to let him find himself. But believe me when I say he had one huge scolding when I found out about you and him.” His mom admitted to you.

“Me coming here today, was because he didn’t want me suffering through the night with sore hands.” You told her.

“And something as simple as that, means a lot to him. You trusted him enough to come back here Y/N. That’s a start.” She wasn’t on anyone’s sides, she just wanted what was best for you both.

“I suppose I didn’t really wanna go back to a dark apartment.” You laughed, forgetting that she didn’t know.

“That deadbeat isn’t helping you with the apartment anymore is he? That’s why you have no electricity.” Eli’s mom couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“I’ve never wanted sympathy, you know that. I don’t want people feeling bad for me.” You sighed.

“I don’t care Y/N, you’re gonna go pack up your stuff and you’re gonna come and stay here.” She was completely serious.

“I can’t just do that, not after everything with Eli. I can’t intrude on you, this is your home not mine.” You were so appreciative of this women, but the offering made you feel bad.

“You’ve never known how to take anything offered to you. Remember Y/N, I’ve known you since you were a little bump on your mom’s belly.” You couldn’t help but wrap your arms around her.

“That’s if it’s alright with you?” His mom said and you turned around to see Hawk watching.

“I don’t think I could want anything more.” He smiled lightly. You walked over to him, and for the first time in forever, you hugged him. He was hesitant at first, but was quick to wrap you in a tight embrace. Hawk never wanted this moment to end.

“You can have the guest bedroom, or maybe share a room with Eli when you get married one day? You can have any room you want apart from mine.” His mom said excitedly as the two of you were still hugging.

“Long shot for marriage Mom!”

“You’ve gotta promise me, that you and I won’t forget this, but we will forgive this. We got over the bullying, we can get over this. Okay?” You held up your little finger, he hooked his over yours as you two sealed the pack with a pinky promise.

“We can do this.” And you couldn’t help the chuckle that fell from your lips as his mom squealed in his excitement.

Maybe things were gonna change for the good rather than the bad this time.

[weasleydream]

i’ll never fall - Ginny x reader

I’m so so sorry that it’s so late! I wrote this for @pregnant-piggy​ ‘s writing challenge but I got a bit too inspired, I haven’t written that much in so long! Once again, congrats for 2k love <3 

My prompts were: “Who do you see when you look at me?” ; “I will never forgive myself for the things I’ve done.” ; and “And you are sure it has nothing to do with the fact that you’re in love with them?” 

Also, once again I think I messed with timeline 

As usual, feel free to like, comment, reblog and enjoy!

Masterlist 

If we were being picky, we could say that all of this began the day Tom Riddle was born. However, this specific point in the history of the wizarding world was the beginning of so many stories that no one could count them all, and mine was complicated enough without mixing them: that’s why we’re going to say that it all began the day I realized I had been manipulated. 

_ _ _ 

It was as if nature itself knew what was coming. If the first of September was usually a bright day, the sun we had been hoping for was a long lost memory erased by the incessant rain. Somehow, even the traditional babblings on platform 9¾ were missing, replaced by parents’ doubts and students’ fears. Was really going to Hogwarts in this year of 1997 a good idea? Dumbledore’s death had been a strong hit to everyone, and now that we knew Snape would be at the head of the school, no one was reassured. Not even Molly Weasley who was usually so valiant. On the platform, with one hand on Ginny’s back and one hand on mine, she seemed as nervous as everyone else, and the fact that she couldn’t look away from Arthur for more than three seconds was the proof we didn’t need. 

I remembered perfectly each first of September since I had received my Hogwarts letter. It was five years ago, and I was sure the view of the red train had never provoked such a wave of panic in me before. I glanced at Ginny; she was looking at me, her face closed in an attempt to hide what she was feeling and what she was fearing. A discreet nod confirmed what I already knew: she was as afraid as I was. Somewhere on our left, a voice said both our names, and we turned around to greet Neville. He hadn’t even needed to use a strong voice. He was pushing his cart on which his bags were stacked. On the top of the pile was sitting proudly a little plant. 

“Mimbulus mimbletonia?” I asked, and he nodded quietly. 

The locomotive whistled and we headed to the nearest door, after having looked away from Ginny and her parents exchanging a quick hug. Most of the compartments were empty, which seemed strange as we had never seen such a small amount of students in the train. Neville led us to the very last compartment where Luna was waiting for us. She said hello, but even her bright personality seemed altered. I really didn’t like this, and it was only the beginning. 

Half an hour after the beginning of the journey, I left the compartment to find my other group of friends. Friends was maybe a big word: in fact the only one I got along pretty well with was Zillah. She was a Hufflepuff and I knew her since we were five or six. Our fathers had worked together for a while in a muggle factory when they were younger, hers because he was a muggle and mine because he and my mother had left the wizarding world when He-who-must-not-be-named had risen the first time. Zillah greeted me with a small smile, and one or two other heads looked up to me. I identified a Slytherin guy in the corner opposite to mine but that didn’t surprise me, Zillah was the kind of person that didn’t let such things as houses determine who she loved. 

“You didn’t give me a lot of news,” she said when I sat next to her, which forced another girl to shift to the left. 

“I know, I just… I was busy.” I looked around quickly, checking that no one was listening to us. The four other persons that were here seemed to be chatting, and only now did I realize that the atmosphere was less heavy than with Ginny, Neville and Luna. Anyways, I decided it was safe enough for me to speak. “You know, with that stuff about my parents…” I added in a lower tone. 

Zillah moved closer to me. 

“And? Did you find anything?” 

“Nothing conclusive. I guess that’s a good sign.” 

Zillah nodded and recovered her previous position. She knew what I was talking about: since a few weeks before the beginning of the summer, my main preoccupation was to find out if my parents - and the rest of my family - were or had been death eaters. A lot of old rumours had resurfaced, and my parents, along with one of my aunts and her half-brother, were suspected to belong to the dark side. I had spent the summer looking for proof, investigating, and I now thought that at least my mother wasn’t guilty of what she was accused of. I still had a doubt about my aunt’s half-brother, but we weren’t blood related, so I had decided it wasn’t my problem, and something was off with my father. 

“I guess you’re relieved,” suddenly commented Zillah. “Now you’ll stop hiding it from your friends.” Indeed, Luna, Neville and even Ginny didn’t know anything about it, and it had been especially hard to hide during the last two weeks that I had spent at the burrow. Ginny obviously knew there was something off with me and had asked me about it several times, but I didn’t want her to know that, not when Neville had made some comments that had persuaded me I was suspected too. “You don’t seem relieved, though.” she added with a suspicious look. “Are you sure you didn’t find anything conclusive?”

“There’s maybe something about my father,” I mumbled, “but I don’t know what to think about it. Something he did a year or so before You-know-who’s fall that makes me think… Well, it makes me think maybe there’s a possibility that he’s killed a muggle family.”

“What?” Zillah’s voice was louder than expected, and the conversations in the compartment stopped briefly. “Why would he have done something like this?” she asked more quietly when chatters filled the compartment again. “I thought he was clean?”

“I told you I don’t know what to think about it… Something’s strange, but I don’t know what.”

Zillah nodded but stayed silent. She didn’t seem that surprised anymore, as if it was something she had been suspecting for a while. It created a big contrast between us because I was still deeply shaken by the news. Learning that your father might be the assassin of an innocent family wasn’t something you could accept easily. The conversations in the compartment stopped briefly, and I wondered why until I noticed a prefect’s head that had appeared through the glass. It was a girl from Ravenclaw, and she glanced briefly at us before walking away. 

“Do you think she’s looking for You-know-who?” guffawed the Slytherin guy. 

Everyone in the compartment chuckled, Zillah included. However, it wasn’t the kind of subject that made me laugh, and I suddenly felt really out of place among these people. I hastily saluted Zillah and left the compartment. I took a few steps just to be out of their sight, and then I stopped, asking myself if I really wanted to go back to Ginny, Neville and Luna. It wasn’t a pleasant sensation, Ginny was the person I was the closest to in the school, but she was really friends with Luna and Neville, and she shared way more with them than with me. If Luna was kind to everyone and me included, Neville had often shown restraint with me, without mentioning the few times I had caught him becoming suddenly very silent as soon as I had stepped in the same room as him. Finally, I decided going back to their compartment was better than spending the rest of the journey standing between two glass doors. 

“- sorry he was ever born. Harry said it was him who killed Dumbledore, he’s not going to get away with it that easily, trust me.”

It was Ginny who was talking, and she didn’t stop when I opened the door. She just shifted to the left to make some room for me, and I sat after having made sure that the door was well closed. Making that kind of comment in a train crowded with people whose intentions weren’t all clear could be very dangerous. 

“And how do you want to proceed?” Asked Luna. “Don’t you think he’ll think some people are thinking like this?”

“We don’t care,” said Neville. “He’ll pay for what he has done.”

“If any of you has an idea, feel free to suggest it. That goes for you too, Y/N, okay?”

I nodded, but a feeling of uneasiness had invaded me. Ginny looked at me with a raised eyebrow, asking me silently what was in my mind. 

“If Snape is at the head of Hogwarts… don’t you think he’ll ask other death eaters to come with him?” A silence greeted my question. “Of course it doesn’t mean I won’t help you!” I added precipitously, “Just that we should be really careful. I’m not sure we know exactly what’s coming, that’s all.” 

“You’re right,” said Neville. “But death eaters or not, everyone who throws a spanner in our work is going to have to face us.”

_ _ _ 

No matter how hard I had tried to convince myself that Hogwarts would be extremely different from before, the sight of the castle took a severe toll on me. The atmosphere reminded me a bit of the one that had enveloped us when Sirius Black had escaped Azkaban: full of fear and Dementors in the sky and around the park. It didn’t look like the safest place on earth anymore, that was for sure. 

It was in silence that all the students that were in the train joined the castle. I was next to Ginny; Neville and Luna were just behind and I could see Zillah’s head a few meters in front of us. It didn’t take a long time to realize that the fears I had expressed before were founded: at each side of the entrance door were three people, all dressed in black, with a severe expression and a very straight posture. A whisper ran through the crowd of students; were they death eaters? The answer came to us in the form of a shout from a massive man. 

“Shut up and move!”

From the corner of the eye, I saw Ginny stiffening and glaring at the guy who had just yelled. She had never looked as dangerous as right now, and I knew better than to think that it was an appearance. 

“Ginny!” I hissed as quietly as possible. “Stop this!”

“But he’s-”

“I know!” Of course I had recognized Amycus Carrow, who had tried his best to torture Ginny only a few months ago. If he had failed, it was just because Ginny had drunk some Felix Felicis before the battle of the Astronomy tower. “But if you don’t want them to show what they are capable of, you’ll have to keep it cool until we’re in the dorm.”

She sighed loudly and nodded. If this time I had adopted the voice of reason, it didn’t mean that I wanted to stay here longer than necessitated, so I picked up the pace to walk past the death eaters. The sigh of relief I wanted to breathe when they would be out of sight stayed blocked in my throat, though: people all dressed in black were standing at regular intervals and this, on each side of the corridor. The silence was heavier in the inside of the castle; it was as if, without being clearly told, everyone had understood that staying quiet was for the best. Only the sound of our feet on the stones could be heard, and it was in this tense atmosphere that we arrived in the Great Hall. 

The four main tables were still here and still the same. It was naturally that I followed Ginny to the Gryffindor table and took place next to her; and only when Neville was sitting in front of us while Luna was joining her place did I realize that the professors’ table was way smaller than before. A few more death eaters were standing in a corner, but Snape’s presence at the exact place Dumbledore used to stand at was the reason everyone was looking in this direction without a word. 

“Look at him…” murmured Neville, which caused him to deal with some terrified looks. 

Snape hadn’t even pronounced anything yet that he had already terrorized half of the school. Then his voice thundered and repercuted between the naked walls and the once magical roof that was now devoid of stars and colorful banners. 

“Things have changed, and they will keep changing.” He paused and his eyes wandered amongst the students. I could have sworn his gaze had stopped on us, and according to the shiver that shook the girl next to me, it wasn’t just an impression. “From now on, the school is mine, and the rules you will follow are mine. Each breach of the rules will cost you a price much higher than a few house points. Any attempt to rebel will be severely punished. I also suggest you to remain in the ranks, or else the consequences could be unfortunate.”

As soon as the echo of his voice disappeared, Snape turned heels and sat in the central seat of the table. He lifted his hand and the doors opened; a seemingly exhausted professor McGonagall was walking in front of a bunch of terrified first years, and to the sound of their steps added weak sobs. When she walked past us, McGonagall glanced quickly in our direction, and from the corner of the eye I saw Ginny nodding imperceptibly. When she finally reached the single wooden stool that had gone unnoticed until then, it was with a firm voice that she shouted the name of the first student. It was as if she was trying her best to ignore the fact that Hogwarts had become the most dangerous place for us all, or maybe to show us that we weren’t alone in this. 

The dinner - because it was hard to call this a feast - was conducted expeditiously and the first students to leave the great hall didn’t stay more than twenty minutes.  Almost an hour and a half after our arrival, Snape’s watch dogs forced the remaining students to leave the great hall and to join the common rooms. A frightening silence was reigning everywhere in the castle, and the cosy common room of the Gryffindor house wasn’t exception. A very few people were occupying the sofas around the chimney, there wasn’t any first year left, and most of the students following us directly took the direction of the stairs leading to the dorms. Neville saluted us quite darkly and disappeared too. 

“I didn’t think it would be so… the way it is.” I whispered as Ginny and I were sitting around a table in the corner of the room. “I remember the day we first entered the great hall… All these terrified kids, it’s awful. They’ll have to pay.”

“I agree. It’s a good thing that a few members of Dumbledore's army are still here, we’ll need as much help as we can get. We’ll have to-”

Ginny suddenly stopped and jumped on her feet, glaring at some point behind my back. I got up too, on the verge of asking what was happening, but the noise that echoed gave me the answer. Amycus Carrow and a woman that looked just like him had barged in, and they were now barking on the third years that were on the sofas. When one of them muttered that they had no right to come here, the woman drew her wand and pointed it between the guy’s eyes. Completely terrified, the latter followed his friend without another word. Understanding that it was useless and dangerous to provoke them at the moment, I went around the table and grabbed Ginny’s wrist. We took the direction of the stairs and we had almost disappeared behind the stone when we both saw it. Amycus Carrow had just nodded at me with a polite smile on the lips. Ginny’s arm moved quickly and a second later, she was shutting the door between us. 

_ _ _ 

“The Weasley girl still doesn't want to talk to you?” asked Zillah with her mouth half full of bread as I was sitting next to her. 

This had become the usual greeting she gave me each morning since I had camped in front of the Hufflepuff common room’s door, just after this thing with Amycus two weeks ago. Ginny had refused to talk to me since then, not even giving me a chance to explain, and of course the next morning Neville’s glares had added to hers. Even Luna didn’t look at me with her natural kindness anymore. Zillah had seemed very surprised when she had seen me the next morning; because I had spent the night on the hard floor of the corridor or because no one had caught me, I wasn’t sure. Still, she was now the friend I seemed to have in this castle.

“No, still not.”

“I think she needs time. I mean, she thinks you’re getting friendly with a death eater. You told me it’s the one who tried to torture her last year, right?”

I hummed and Zillah shrugged. 

“Then I understand why she’s upset.” she paused to pat my shoulder. “Maybe she’ll even come to you first, who knows?”

“I hope so…”

Then a silence took place. My eyes were fixed on Ginny who was talking with Neville and Luna. The three of them were isolated from the rest of the Gryffindor that were in the great hall for breakfast, which wasn’t a lot. It was clear that their attitude was hiding something fishy with them. 

“Are they preparing something?” suddenly asked Zillah. She was looking in the same direction as me and had a reprobatory look on her face. 

“Probably, yes. They want to defend the castle,” I said before shaking my head. “I hope they’ll be prudent, it would kill Molly if something happened to her.” 

“Yes, it looks like Ginny and her mother are really close to each other.”

I glanced at Zillah, surprised that she knew so much about Molly. As far as I knew, she had never talked to a Weasley. But my interrogations were cut short when an altercation burst on the other side of the great hall. Neville was standing up to one of Snape’s friends, and he was hiding a young girl behind him, probably a first year. Luna slipped underneath the table and grabbed the girl’s hand, leading her outside while Ginny was trying to calm Neville down. Finally, the silence came back when he agreed to follow her, and they disappeared behind the huge door. 

“I still don’t understand why you don’t scream in their ears until they listen to you.” Zillah paused the time to let Snape walk to the professors’ table before getting closer to me. “I mean, your side of the street is clean, right? It’s not your fault if Amycus is weird.” I shrugged, trying to find the good words to explain why I had been waiting for two weeks instead of grasping the nettles. “Unless you think you have a reason to blame yourself, of course…” She finished with an interrogative look. 

“Well… One of her brothers has been badly hurt by Fenrir Greyback, and his wedding has been ruined by death eaters. Another of his brothers was poisoned last year because of Malfoy. She has more reasons to hate the death eaters than anyone else and… I still don’t know what happened with my father, and I have even more doubts since this thing with Carrow... I just feel like it’s not right to stay by her side if I’m not sure that my father’s innocent, you know?”

Zillah nodded. 

“I think you’re right, you can’t risk her hating you for nothing,” she conceded. “But how will you find the answers you’re looking for?” 

“I don’t know.” I grumbled, before slamming my fist on the table. “It’s so unfair! What the hell is happening? Why does it have to be happening to me?”

“Relax Y/N, I’m not sure you want to make a scene in the middle of the great hall.” Zillah wrapped her arm around my shoulders. “You know you’re not alone, right? Whatever happens with Ginny and the others, I’m still with you.”

_ _ _ 

It was so unexpected that it took a few seconds for me to process what I had just heard. I was walking in the corridors somewhere near the library when three voices stopped me dead in my tracks. The voices were coming from behind the door that was just in front of me, belonging to three men I had never heard before even though they were obviously part of Snape’s watch dogs. At first, the voices were too low and all I could hear was a blur of unidentified sounds. But as soon as my ears were used to the muffled words, I realized they were talking about a particularly severe punishment and I had the feeling that I knew who was the target. 

“ - couldn’t get them yet. Seems like the director is nervous about this and we all know how he can be when he’s not satisfied. He says it may be for today.”

“Maybe, but the fuckers are well organized, and we can’t just take them like this. The seniors won’t let us and we can’t afford to have the Order in our way.”

“The third year we’ve interrogated earlier said they were preparing their things in a special room in the castle, the room of requirements I think he said. Seventh floor. We can take a shot.”

“Never heard of this before, you sure he didn’t lie to you?”

“Trust me, he knew better than that.”

The first who had talked said something else, but I didn’t hear it. I had taken a few steps back and my brain was almost burning: how could I avoid Ginny and the others getting caught? I knew what was going to happen if evidences were found, I myself had paid full price for defending a bunch of terrified second years in front of Alecto Carrow and the sanction reserved for Ginny, Neville and Luna oughted to be even worse. 

The wooden door suddenly opened, leaving me defenseless in front of three death eaters that drew their wands as in one. I was so terrified that my brain, which was so fast only a few seconds ago, seemed to be freezing along with the blood in my veins. 

“I suggest that you find a good excuse for listening to us, or I can promise you you’ll regret it.” threatened a tall and thin man, whose face seemed to be the copy of a rat’s. 

“I know what they’re going to do and where I can tell you if you want.” I blurted out before holding my breath, praying that they would be convinced. 

The three guys exchanged looks, and the one on the left seemed dangerously sceptical. Finally, the rat-faced guy nodded and lifted an eyebrow. 

“It’s for soon, in the potions classroom.” I started, trying my best to keep control of my breath. “I believe they want to make it explode, I’ve seen them gathering all sorts of forbidden products. I think they’re already there, but-”

“You better be telling the truth.” 

With that, the three men left precipitously and as soon as their bodies had disappeared from my sight, I turned tails and ran in the other direction. I needed to get to Ginny as soon as possible to warn her not to do whatever she had in mind. By the time I had gotten to the seventh floor, my legs were burning and my lungs felt like they were on the verge of exploding. Without losing a second, I began pacing to make the door appear but someone’s arrival interrupted me. 

“You here? Get out of here, you traitor!” 

It was Seamus, and he rolled up his sleeve as if to address his words. 

“Seamus!” I exclaimed, which definitely surprised him. “I need you to tell Ginny to stop whatever she’s preparing. She’s in danger, you hear me? In danger! Someone denounced her to Snape and he knows she’s here with Neville, Luna and whoever helps them. I led the death eaters off the scent but it won’t be enough, tell them, okay?”

And with that, I left as quickly as I had come, afraid that the wrong person could see me here and guess what had happened. I glanced in my back one last time - Seamus was still looking at me, seemingly very confused, but he nodded silently before being hidden by the wall. I only managed to join the fifth floor when a voice shouted loudly. 

“You! Stop!”

I had been caught. 

The rat-faced guy grabbed my arm, his fingers tightening me so tightly that it felt like he was touching my bones. He was almost growling, the sound coming from the depth of his throat and terrifying me as much as a snarling wolf would have. The man, Marcus as it seemed since one of his friends called him when he joined us, abruptly pulled my arm to make me walk behind him. His pace was quick and determined, and his jaw tightly clenched. As far as I could see, he was furious, and the little hope I had left vanished. I didn’t even know if I would make it out alive. 

The three men brought me to an empty classroom that I was positive I had never been in before. The tables were all covered in a thick layer of dust, some of them were broken and so were the chairs. There was no window, only one door and the latter closed quietly behind us. I had the intuition that it wouldn’t open that easily, and definitely not soon. 

It was dark in there, but not enough to be blind. That made me realize that the walls had a certain number of cracks, and for a second I thought of screaming with all the breath in my lungs. Marcus probably had the same idea at the same time; before I could do anything, he cast a silencing spell on me. 

“This way, we’re sure we won’t be bothered.” he whispered with a twisted smile. 

My heart began to beat at a terrible pace, and the fact that I was trying to scream so loud without even producing a whimper made me feel so defenseless that I never tried to protect myself. I just waited for the punishment, knees getting numb on the stone floor, expecting the pain without receiving it. It looked like it wasn’t what Marcus wanted; he tried to get me to react, maybe even attack him in what we both knew would be a desperate and useless attempt to escape; he pushed me before putting me back on my knees, insulted me, described me all he would do to me, all he wanted to do to Ginny, but I didn’t want to give him satisfaction. I wanted to focus on something else than the torture I was about to suffer, and all I found was to imagine Ginny swooping in to save me and telling me she wasn’t mad anymore. 

However, it wasn’t Ginny’s voice that I heard when the first Cruciatus spell hit me, and it wasn’t hers either that I heard during the unending time that the punishment lasted. 

_ _ _ 

“Y/N? Y/N?” 

The voice seemed to come from a dream, muffled as if I had cotton in the ears, distant and soothing. 

“Y/N!”

It suddenly became louder, more defined, and with the proximity I heard something else in this voice. Something that wasn’t soothing, it was the contrary; it was anxious and stressful, not very steady but not shaking either. More importantly, it was Ginny’s voice. 

I opened my eyes, and it took a moment to remember where I was. The classroom. I could see the tables that had been moved around me, and I could even see the walls which was impossible before. A tall silhouette was getting close to me, someone that I couldn’t identify because the door was open behind them and there was too much light. The person that was now next to me kneeled and Ginny’s features appeared. She seemed disturbed, sad too. 

“She’s awake!” she shouted above her shoulder, which made me screech. My head was on the verge of exploding. “Come on,” she added more softly as her eyes were on me again. “We’ll bring you somewhere safe.” 

I nodded and let her and Neville, who had gotten in too, lift me to put me back on my feet. My legs had never felt so heavy and devoid of strength, I was nothing more than a dead weight as the two carried me out of this hell. As we got closer to the door, I identified three more persons; Zillah was standing next to Luna, and Seamus had taken a step forward to help Ginny. The latter shook her head and I felt her grip on my waist tightening. 

The way to the room of requirements - I had heard Neville mentioning it, so I had supposed it was our destination - was essentially composed of stairs, and no matter how hard I tried to help Neville and Ginny, there wasn’t an ounce of energy left in my body. Every single cell was terribly painful, I had never suffered so much in my life before. 

We finally reached a corridor of the seventh floor, the same in which I had stumbled upon Seamus earlier - how long I didn’t know though, it was another question I would have to ask. A huge door appeared and Ginny half carried me inside. She helped me reach a makeshift bed on the floor, and as soon as my head touched the fabric, my eyes closed. 

And they stayed closed for a while, or so I supposed when I woke up. The room was no longer almost empty, it was more looking like an anthill now that all the beds and hammocks were occupied. But it wasn’t exactly time for sleeping; all the conversations were forming a soft buzzing somehow reassuring. Despite my sore body, I sat up and took a better look around me. The room wasn’t huge, maybe a bit bigger than a large classroom, not much more. The beds were in fact makeshift mattresses with colorful blankets, and the hammocks that were as colorful were suspended to the walls. There were also two banners hanging from the wall in front of the door; one for Gryffindor and one for Ravenclaw. 

“It’s because we only have Gryffindors and Ravenclaws here,” said Ginny as she arrived from behind me with a water bottle. She handed it to me and I glanced to thank her before drinking avidly. “Though we probably will have to add another, your friend Zillah is here too. Very curious, maybe even too much.” she frowned before shaking her head. “But it’s not important. Are you feeling better?”

Ginny waited patiently as I was finishing the water. The sips I took were now longer and I was slower for a very good reason: I didn’t know what to say. Ginny wasn’t stupid though, and she gestured toward two Ravenclaw girls that I didn’t know. They nodded and left, leaving the two of us alone in this corner of the room. 

“Y/N, I need you to tell me how you’re feeling.”

I could have answered a lot of things, like hungry, cold, afraid, sore… It was all true. Yet now Ginny was next to me, caring for me, and there was only one answer that seemed correct. 

“Safe,” I murmured. 

“You are now.” she whispered back. “We’ll make them pay, you can trust me.” 

I nodded. The thought was somewhat soothing, but I couldn’t focus on that. It seemed strange that after such a long time spent seemingly hating me, at least avoiding me, Ginny was now sitting next to me, bringing me water and promising she would seek vengeance for me. 

“Ginny, who do you see when you look at me?”

She looked up to me, seemingly surprised. 

“I see one of my best friends that has been tortured to protect me. I know, Seamus told me,” she added before I could say anything. “I don’t see a traitor or an enemy, if that’s what you were asking. I’ve never seen a traitor or an enemy. Just… Someone I didn’t trust enough, I guess.”

I looked away, slightly hurt. I would have trusted her with my life, even before all of this. Knowing that it wasn’t mutual was something I would have a hard time to accept. 

“Y/N, trust me, I’ll never forgive myself for the things I’ve done to you. I shouldn’t have been so mefiant, I should have given you a chance to explain.” 

“Yes, you should have.” 

Ginny looked away, something that looked a lot like regret painted all over her face. It was rare to see her displaying her deepest emotions, it caught me by surprise and it was without thinking that I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. 

“Don’t worry, you trust me now, right? That’s all that matters.” 

Ginny nodded and stared at me with an interrogative look. 

“Can I ask you something?” She didn’t wait for my answer and continued. “Why didn’t you try to explain? Actually, what happened that day? Why was Carrow so… nice with you?”

“I don’t know why,” I mumbled. “I found it as strange as you. As for why I didn’t explain, it’s… it’s complicated, Ginny.”

“I think I can understand.” 

There was no way I could avoid this discussion, that was clear. So I sighed and told her everything about all the research I had gone through, why I suspected my father to be a murderer, why I had felt like I didn’t have the right to be her friend. Ginny stayed silent for a while, and I didn’t have any idea on what her reaction would be. Her face was closed, she was looking at some point in the opposite corner of the room, where Zillah was talking with Luna and another Ravenclaw girl. 

“And what was Zillah’s reaction when you told her you didn’t feel like you could be my friend?”

I hesitated before answering. The question was weird, it was not really what I was expecting but Ginny seemed to be deep in her thoughts. 

“She said that I was right, I shouldn’t talk to you before being sure my father was innocent. Why?”

“You don’t find it strange that she didn’t advise you the contrary? To come to me and try to explain?”

“I… don’t know.” I hesitated again. “Ginny, what are you thinking about?”

“You noticed that Zillah was there when we found you in the classroom, earlier?” I nodded. Yes, I had seen her, even though I wasn’t expecting her when it was Ginny, Neville, Luna and Seamus that she was accompanying. “No one told her what you had done, and she wasn’t with you before. She’s the one who led us to you. How did she know?”

“Ginny… I know where this is going, but you’re wrong. Zillah’s my friend, and she didn’t even know what I was going to do! I was alone when I heard their conversation and I didn’t see her afterward.” 

“I’m not talking about this.” Ginny’s voice was calm, and it was firmly that she grabbed my wrist to address her words. “Y/N, I’m not saying she denounced you to the death eaters. I’m saying she denounced us to them, and you just happened to hear them.”

“But how would she-”

I suddenly stopped because the question was useless. I knew how she had learnt about what Ginny, Neville and the others were preparing. Something as burning as acid slowly crept in my veins; it was guilt, because I was the one who had told her. 

“I’m sorry Y/N, but it looks like you gave your trust to the wrong person.” 

“Ginny, I’m- I’m sorry, if I had been-”

“It’s not your fault. I promise she too will pay for hurting you.”

Ginny was now infuriated; if her face was stoic, her eyes said it all for her. 

_ _ _ 

“Zillah?” repeated Luna. “I knew I shouldn’t have warned her about the Wrackspurts. She deserves to have her brain go fuzzy.”

“Brain fuzzy or not, at least we know who the traitor is.” added Ginny. “Now, we have to confront her.”

“But we have no proof,” interjected Neville. “We’re not sure that she’s really the one who ratted us out, maybe she found us just because she was looking for Y/N. As for the ‘you shouldn’t talk to Ginny thing’, it’s not a secret that she doesn’t like us, maybe she just wanted to keep Y/N for herself.”

“It can’t be a coincidence,” said Ginny. “And I refuse to let her get out of this just because we’re not sure.”

“You’re making it personal.”

“Of course I’m making it personal!” exploded Ginny. “You saw Y/N too, didn’t you? You helped me carry her because she had been tortured so much that she couldn’t even walk! How can I make it anything else than personal?”

Seeing them talking about me as if I wasn’t here was getting annoying, so I just interrupted them. It caused me to deal with a murderous look that disappeared as soon as Ginny realized it was me. 

“Neville’s right, we can’t do anything as long as we’re not sure. And it’s not by sitting here that you’ll find the proof you’re looking for,” I added before Ginny could interrupt me. “Maybe we should stop talking and begin searching.”

“You’re right,” she conceded. “Neville, Luna, you should start asking people about Zillah, but only people we trust, okay?”

Neville rolled his eyes, either because of the obvious recommendation or because Ginny had taken her time to admit he was right, but he still got up and followed Luna. As for me, I ignored Ginny’s piercing eyes when she asked me to follow her out of the room of requirements. We both stayed silent for a while: everytime one of us wanted to say something, someone stepped in the corridor we were in and silence was never broken. 

“I know what you’re doing.” Finally said Ginny as we were heading to the library. She brushed aside my innocent face and continued. “I think you’re still hoping that she’s innocent.”  It was useless to deny it; of course I didn’t want Ginny to be right, so instead of trying to find excuses, I shrugged. “I get it that it’s hard for you Y/N, placing your trust in the wrong person is… Well, it’s not very pleasant. But you have people you can trust around you, you have real friends. You have me.” 

“Thank you Ginny. I- I needed to hear that.”

She nodded and accelerated a bit to open the library’s door in front of me. 

“You didn’t tell me what we’re doing here,” I murmured as I was following her through the shelves until we stumbled upon Madam Pince. 

“Can we go to the restricted section? It’s important.”

Madam Pince simply nodded and Ginny gestured to me to follow her. 

“Since when can we go to the restricted section without any authorization?” I asked, flabbergasted. 

“We have one, Madam Pince just allowed us, didn’t she?” Ginny glanced at me with an amused look. “It’s not the first time I’m searching in this section for information, that’s all.”

“I’ve been several times too and I always needed a note from a professor,” I grumbled as Ginny opened the door of the section. Once sure we were alone in it, Ginny turned to me and finally explained why we were here. 

“We’re going to do some research about this muggle family you think your father has killed.”

“Why?”

“Because there’s something strange, and with Zillah’s reaction, I wonder if her family isn’t involved.” 

“Impossible,” I objected. “They are muggles.”

“That’s what she told you.” I was beginning to find this far-fetched when she asked me something else that made me doubt. “Tell me, does Zillah seem scared by the whole muggle born thing to you?”

I opened and closed my mouth several times. Now that I thought about it, she didn’t seem even concerned by the several attacks and controls that the muggle borns were suffering. I hadn’t heard her talking about it once, and if we added the behaviour I had found inappropriate in the train, then it was natural to think that maybe she had something to hide. As Ginny was still monologuing, I found a table in a corner between two shelves and pulled a chair; I hadn’t said anything about it, but all the cells of my body were still burning, making every movement really painful. 

“Does it still hurt?” asked Ginny from behind me. Her hand suddenly appeared in front of me, holding a vial filled with potion. “It’s for the pain.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled before drinking it straight. “So, where do we begin?”

The next hour and half was spent pouring over genealogy books and articles mentioning murders and death eaters. The potion Ginny had given me had made me sleepy, my eyes were closing despite my will to stay awake to find information, and Ginny eventually decided it was enough for this day. 

“I’m going to bring you back to the room of requirements, and then I’ll help Neville and Luna, okay?”

I nodded and let her put back in their shelves all the books we had been reading. Then we left the library and joined our little safe place. Ginny only left after having made sure I was in my bed and too asleep to move away from it. 

_ _ _ 

“I gotta admit you were right,” mumbled Neville, the eyes still fixed on the picture he was holding. 

“I knew it, there was something strange from the beginning! Zillah is a liar and she had us all.” 

Ginny had finally found the proof she had been looking for for days now: my father wasn’t a murderer. He had probably never known the muggle family that had been killed, I would have to ask him if the opportunity arose. The picture was a good enough evidence in itself: it had been taken by a muggle that lived in a street close to where the murder had occured, only a few minutes after the presumed moment of the facts. It showed a man leaving an alley with what looked awfully like blood all over his clothes. He was a wizard, which couldn’t be denied as he was holding a wand, and more importantly, his face wasn’t my fathers but the same as Zillah. I had first objected that it could be a coincidence; that was great because I was now sure my father wasn’t responsible, but maybe it wasn’t a member of Zillah’s family? Ginny had then handed me a copy of a muggle newspaper that mentioned a guy with Zillah’s family name, saying that he had been missing for a week. He had disappeared two days before the murder. 

“But-” I had tried to object before Neville interrupted me.

“Listen Y/N, I think that these are unquestionable evidence. I understand that you refuse to believe that your friend lied to you, but it seems pretty obvious to me that she isn’t the person she says she is.”

“Even if it’s his father, it doesn’t mean that she knew!” I exclaimed. Neville and Ginny exchanged a glance that I didn’t like at all, and Ginny sighed. 

“There’s something we haven’t told you,” she began. “We didn’t want to break it to you unless we were sure, but with all the things we’ve found, there’s no doubt left. You know this Slytherin guy she’s always with?” I nodded, apprehending what was next. “He and all his family have sworn allegiance to You-know-who. She meets regularly with him and a few other people in the dungeons. Most of them have well known death eaters in their family.”

Neville and Ginny were both looking at me and looking sorry. The latter patted my shoulder before wrapping her arm around my shoulders. 

“We can’t let her know we’ve figured everything out,” she murmured. “I think it would be too dangerous.”

“I know.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

Neville shook his head, an irritating sympathetic look on his face, and he left without another word. Ginny was still just next to me; with everything that had happened, I was probably in for several months with her following me like my own shadow. That thought didn’t bother me at all. 

“You know, Neville doesn’t really understand why you didn’t ask your family about all of this,” said Ginny after a few minutes spent in silence. “After all, with the rumours it’s legitimate. Is it because of this?”

“I wasn’t sure I could trust my mother to tell me the truth, and I didn’t ask my father for obvious reasons. As for the rest of my family, they are all suspected too.”

“I see,” she murmured. “I’m sorry Y/N, I didn’t find anything about them, just the proof that your father’s innocent. At least now, you’ll be able to ask your parents.”

I noded silently. After another few minutes, Ginny decided I had to change my mind and offered to follow her in the greenhouses. I first refused; couldn’t she let me get depressed on my own? But she insisted and I eventually gave up, secretly grateful that she hadn’t just left me alone. 

I thought that with time, I had gotten used to the new Hogwarts, to the now omnipresent silence and darkness that crept in every corridor. It had been a while since the first of September, a time long enough to forget how joyful the place used to be. However, when we got to the main floor, where usually there were always several groups of students and even teachers no matter what time it was, it hit me harder than ever that the school was now like dead. As if it had been killed by all the evil that had invited itself. 

“It’s scary, isn’t it?” I glanced at Ginny, wondering if she was thinking about the same thing as I was. “How everything seems physically darker than before,” she added. “In all honesty, I don’t know anymore what could save the castle… I thought that Dumbledore's Army was the solution, but let’s face it… We’re not changing anything here.”

“You’re wrong, many students are safe in the room of requirements thanks to Dumbledore’s Army. And think about the day Harry, Ron and Hermione will come back, think about how things will change!”

Ginny nodded with a smile and quietly thanked me. If it hadn’t sounded so cliché, I would have answered that she had done way more for me, and that all I wanted was her to be confident because I would have done anything for her. But it did sound very cliché, so I just shrugged it off. 

“Funny how you just thought of my brother and his friend,” Ginny suddenly said with a malicious smile. “You are sure it had nothing to do with the fact that you’re in love with him?”

“What?” I exclaimed in disbelief. “Me? In love with Ron? Certainly not!” 

“Then why are you always so excited to come with us for the holidays?” 

Ginny seemed to be really amused by the situation, but I really wasn’t. She was right when she said that I was always overjoyed to spend some time at the Burrow but it wasn’t for Ron, I barely spoke with him! I wasn’t sure about the reason behind this excitement but it was definitely not her brother. 

“I don’t know, but trust me, it’s not because of any of your brothers.” 

“That’s too bad.” she stated, even though it didn’t really look like she was disappointed. “I still hope one day, you’ll be officially part of the family.” I laughed, and agreed with her. “You know what they say, as long as there’s life, there’s hope!”

“Yeah, well it looks like we won’t stay hopeful for long, then,” I mumbled as I was watching the empty corridor. 

“You shouldn’t be so pessimistic, Y/N.” Ginny wasn’t smiling anymore, but she wasn’t looking defeated either. She was just determined. “We’re together, there’s inevitably hope. You and I, we’re two against the storm, and we have our friends and family. I’m not too afraid, and I don’t want you to be.”

“I’m not,” I smiled. “Not anymore. Ginny, I just wanted you to know that… As long as you need me, I won’t fall.”

She grabbed my hand and smiled. 

“I’ll always need you.”

“Then I’ll never fall.”

[woeisme-iamwoe]

an absolutely massive Haikyuu!! fic rec pt. 2

IwaOi this time around. My favorite ship. The world’s favorite ship...there’s so many

Undecipherable, by ioo (4k. G. canonverse)

 I’m pretty sure the author meant ‘indecipherable’, nevertheless! I am appalled that this work doesnt have more hits. Y'all are sleeping on it and that's not okay. 

The sound of the door slamming against the wall has Hajime startling back to the present. He looks at the source of the disturbance and finds himself face to face with Oikawa, red in the face with breathlessness and a leather-bound notebook tightly clutched in both of this hands. When he spots Hajime, he makes a beeline for the bench and slaps it down right next to him.

"Koi no yokan," he says. "The sense one can have upon first meeting a person that the two of you are going to fall in love."

 primavera, by tothemoon (8k. T. canonverse)

All of tothemoon’s works read so beautifully 

They say it takes twenty-six years, for certain breeds to fully bloom. 

Learning to Walk (So That We Can Run), by ricekrispyjoints (27k. M. canon-divergence)

I've read this work so many times. Like, so many times and I’ve never tired from it. Gorgeous. The shift from friendship to romance felt so natural, love it. 

"I'm not healing like I should be."

In his second year of university, physical therapy just isn't cutting it. Oikawa's knee is getting worse, and he can't hide it anymore.

Or: the light angst, project-your-own-life-experiences-on-Oikawa knee surgery fic you didn't know you wanted.

 Priorities, by weirdmilk (2k. T. canonverse)

Kissy, kissy. 

‘I just -’ Oikawa begins, ‘it might be difficult to get married, sometimes, I think.’ He chews on his lip.

Iwaizumi makes a questioning noise.

‘Ah,’ Oikawa says, and then, in a rush, ‘if I didn't want a wife at all - what then? If I said that to you. If I told you I can’t see it. Like - the wedding dress. The bride. I just can’t see it.’

Iwaizumi swallows again, his heart beating much faster than the conversation warrants. He wonders whether Oikawa can hear it. ‘You’re eighteen. You aren’t supposed to see it yet.’ He snorts. ‘I mean - if we’re sharing shit, I’ve never even kissed a girl.’ He doesn’t mind admitting it. It’s not something that bothers him - he’s never prioritised girls very highly, and despite Oikawa’s largely undeserved status as Miyagi’s most eligible teenage bachelor, he doesn’t think Oikawa has ever wanted a serious relationship with any of his fan club, either.

Oikawa and Iwaizumi can't sleep before their first practice match with Karasuno.

 Before Midnight, by fathomfive (2k. G. canonverse)

Reads like a fairytale. 

The sky turns, the seasons turn over, and Iwaizumi and Oikawa track the movements of the stars. Nothing is ever quite constant, but it's close enough.

The grass is stiff with frost. They walk in silence past the raked-over vegetable garden and up the back hill, footsteps crackling, and stand side-by-side at the top of an incline that used to seem much bigger. Iwaizumi glances over but Oikawa’s already gone, eyes searching the sky with no hint of hurry, just a kind of reverent patience.

 make a bet, keep a promise, by raewrites (13k. M. canonverse)

Bet still on. 

Sometimes, in still moments, Iwaizumi wonders why out of all the people on earth he ended up with Oikawa Tooru. Why it’s his face that lingers on his fading conscious in the last moments before he falls asleep, in the first blurry seconds upon waking up again. Why when he looks to his side, he expects Oikawa to be there in the same way he expects to see five fingers on both hands, a natural extension of himself, ever present.

Why he can’t imagine a future without Oikawa in it.

It begins with a bet made between the two boys in the mid-summer of their eighth year. It starts with volleyball, but like with most things involving Oikawa Tooru and Iwaizumi Hajime, things are never quite that simple.

 our hearts still beat the same, by knightswatch  

 two birds, by thelittlebirdthattoldyou (5k. T. canonverse)

Of heartbreaking letters and paper crane wishes. 

Five months into the term, two months after he’s stopped replying to Oikawa’s texts, the first package arrives. A small square box, wrapped in brown paper and tied with string, and Hajime almost trips over it on the way to his dorm.

There’s a letter attached.

Oikawa doesn’t know how many times he’ll have to put his feelings down on paper before Iwaizumi believes them. 

Through My Eyes, by anchoringsouls (2k. G. canonverse)

Okay! Okay, we were doing great with the soft, happy love up until the last part! That's great, just great!

“I think if you ever saw yourself through my eyes, you would fall in love with yourself the same way the way I did with you.” 

in time it could be ours, by deusreks (3k. T. canonverse)

Anyone wanna go back in time and make a time capsule with me only to dig it up years later and we’re actually in love?

Set post Seijou's match with Karasuno. There's a moderate amount of rolling in the dirt. No pajamas were hurt in the writing of this fic.

There, in their joint backyard, was Oikawa Tooru, clad in his silly luminescent space pajamas, digging a hole near a cherry tree.

“What the hell, Oikawa.”

Tooru stubbornly continued digging. He looked pitiful in that moment; everything that was grand about him in daylight was meaningless in the darkness. He was only a boy with a shovel whose broken heart mirrored Hajime’s own.

 we can do better than that, by spaceburgers (16k. M. canonverse)

Of course, of course, the IwaOi road trip fic. AnD thErE wAs ONly OnE bED!

Oikawa and Iwaizumi go on a road trip during the summer after their high school graduation. It doesn't go as expected, but maybe that's not such a bad thing after all. 

They Say it Rains Diamonds on Jupiter, by exsao (35k. T. canonverse)

I don't know, just gorgeous. Hajime’s so in love. 

"You're in love with him."

Hajime considers denying it. He considers deliberately choking on his drink to express surprise, to create a distraction by spitting onto the man in front of him's pristine white shirt and causing a commotion. Instead, he swallows his mouthful of soda and heaves a small sigh once his mouth is free.

"Yeah," he says instead.

He's never been good at lying, anyway.

 Midnight boys/sunset town, by carafin (10k words. T. Housemates AU):

The author says they played off of the fact that Oikawa oftentimes forgoes his sleep in order to work, and wrote it so that he doesn't sleep at all. This was so cute, kinda sad, mostly not. Love how Iwaizumi just goes along with whatever crazy stilch Oikawa is on. 

In which Iwaizumi Hajime grows a few chili plants, participates in an eating contest, breaks into a park, and falls in love with a man who doesn't ever sleep - not exactly in that order.

5 Reasons Why Iwaizumi Hajime's Flatmate Is A Complete Weirdo (An Incomplete List)

1. He's obsessed with that stupid bucket list of his.

2. He's the proud owner of seven truly ugly, criminally hideous movie posters with aliens on them, which he insists on pasting all over the damn living room.

3. He's always stealing Hajime's sweatshirts.

4. Sometimes, he wakes Hajime up for breakfast. At 5AM. On Saturday mornings.

5. He literally never, ever sleeps.

 The Best I Ever Had, by FindingSchmomo (62k words. T. Canon-divergent):

You’ve read it, your mum’s read it, your dog has probably read it (you really need to take facial recognition for him off your phone, he’s got some weird nighttime habits). So basically this fic caused me physical pain and then pumped me full of morphine and now I’m good! Beautiful read, hated Oikawa for a while, Iwaizumi is the only boy I would ever feel safe alone with. 

A story of separation and time lost. Oikawa and Iwaizumi lose contact, and life goes on. Now, a decade later and back in Japan, Oikawa wonders if he can pick the pieces back together, despite knowing Iwaizumi has moved on. A story of their past, present and future, pieced together by shaky hands.

 darlin', your head's not on right, by aruariandance (13k words. T. canonverse)

Again, I’m pretty sure anybody who's anybody has read this fic and for good reason! Super sweet realizing you're in love fic. Makes me reconsider wanting to get married. 

'“Our wedding,” Oikawa says by way of explanation, tapping his finger against his magazine more emphatically. “What colors should we use? Color scheme is important, apparently.”

Iwaizumi feels his lifespan shortening.

“I was thinking our Aoba johsai colors to go for more, you know, softer tones? Besides, I’ve always looked great in that sea foam green color. Oh, and I guess you look decent in it, too.” He grins, saccharine sweet, and Iwaizumi has never been so tempted to knock one of his perfect pearly white teeth right out of his stupid mouth."

or,

Oikawa teases Iwaizumi about a childhood promise he made to marry him when they were older, except suddenly it's not really a joke at all.

 the courtship ritual of the hercules beetle, by kittebasu (66k. T. canon divergent)

Is this one of the most famous Iwaoi fic? I don’t know. Looks like it, I know it's my personal favorite. Where Oikawa studies bugs for a living and can’t seem to come to terms with his feelings. Very angsty, love that in a fic. 

Tooru is pretty sure he could manage the mating habits of a mosquito. It’s the mating habits of people he can’t seem to get right.

 Terrarium, by sausaged (11k. T. Post-canon)

Honestly, I’m so surprised this fic doesnt have more hits! It’s so good! Made me ache! I love the memories and character growth shown through the growing of the terrarium, absolutely adore that kind of symbolism. So beautiful, give it some love because it's one of my absolute favorites. 

He's practically a professional at being proactive (lies, lies, and lies when it comes to Iwaizumi).

At this point, is he really happy with just staying best friends forever? Will he be writing journals and collecting rocks forever (he will, he knows, but that is aside from the point)?

Can he really tag his Instagram photos with #YOLO if he doesn't actually put that phrase into practice?

 A story about Oikawa Tooru, Iwaizumi Hajime, plants, and rocks.

 Lips like sugar, by ohhotlamb (8k. T. canonverse)

Why did my childhood best friend never offer to help me practice kissing only for us to realize we were only interested in each other? I had a fake high school experience. 

Hajime is offered to learn the art of kissing from a true professional, one Oikawa Tooru. It's not as bad as he thought it would be.

 Falling Slowly, by bravely (commovente) (3k. T. canonverse)

So special, imagine loving one person, and one person only like this for the entirety of your life. This is getting too sappy, I want off of this ride. 

over the years, some things change; but over the years, some things stay mostly the same.

(alternatively, mornings with oikawa and iwaizumi over the years).

 No sleep in the city, by loveclouds (7k. T. canonverse)

Mass/volume = Iwaizumi, apparently. (Please. If anyone gets this absolutely horrific joke, lets elope).

Along their journey to find Tokyo's best ramen, Iwaizumi finds himself asked again and again why Oikawa is still single.

 Time, by surveycorpsjean (5k. E. canonverse)

Growing older together. 

When they're twenty-three, their story only begins.

 Everything With You, by Ellessey (14k. E. canonverse)

Came damn near to crying, you can just feel Iwaizumi’s pain. Fight scene was probably the most emotion evoking one I’ve read in a long while. 

‘Hajime still loves Oikawa, but he understands now. Oikawa can't look at him and see someone he could potentially date.

And that makes it easier to not focus on the little things that used to drive him crazy—Oikawa's long legs, the way he's always hanging off of Hajime, how his whole face changes when he gets ready for a jump serve, and he looks like he could take on the entire world and win.

This new arrangement though, this living together situation, is presenting a new set of variables that must be adjusted to, and the nakedness is one of them.’

--

For years, being Oikawa’s best friend has worked out fine. Hajime is hopelessly in love with him, but it’s enough. Then Oikawa—who, by all accounts, has never been anything but determinedly, assuredly straight—gets a boyfriend. Or a boy friend-with-benefits. Hajime doesn’t know, and he doesn’t give a shit about the definition.

What he knows is that remaining best friends is starting to seem a bit too painful (way too painful) to be considered a solid option.

 The Best Best, by rikke (12k. T. canonverse/future fic)

Takeru is a whole mood. Don’t want kids, but I do want domesticity and this fic feeds me well.

“Congratulations, Iwa-chan! You’re a dad!” Iwaizumi hears as soon as the door opens. He’s dealt with Oikawa for all of his twenty-one years of age now, but this declaration is still sufficiently disturbing enough that he turns from his place on the couch and braces himself for whatever Oikawa has done this time.

 Or the one where Iwaizumi and Oikawa babysit Takeru for a week.

 cheek kisses, by ohhotlamb (G. 3k. Future fic)

Sooo cute!! 

“Every time,” Hajime murmurs, “every time I see you again I remember how fuckin’ crazy I am about you.”

 Routine, by snoqualmie  (2k. T. canonverse)

Again, anyone wanna be my childhood best friend so we can put face masks on each other and fall in love? I died, truly. 

Iwaizumi is fourteen years old, horny too often and angry all the time, and he’s just starting to notice that Tooru’s legs are really long, that his lips are kinda soft looking, and his fingers feel good pressed under his jaw.

 Thirty Years and Change (the Games of the XXXIII Olympiad, by sunsmasher (19k. G. canon divergence)

Be wary, I would give this fic an upper rating to probably Teen and the follow-up fic is Explicit. But, Oikawa on the Japanese national team is just a dream as is, but add in a rekindling friendship and an angsty make out sesh? Mwah, delizioso. 

It’s July 10th, 2024, and Oikawa Tooru is an Olympian. His smiling face airs on an NHK promo every 45 seconds. He’s captain of the national men’s volleyball team, reigning star of the professional leagues, and he hasn't spoken to Iwaizumi Hajime in two years.

He has, however, sent Iwaizumi tickets for the 2024 Los Angeles Summer Games.

“So go,” says Matsukawa's voice. “It’s only a few weeks. You’ve got a whole city to hide in if it gets awkward, and if it doesn’t get awkward, well…”

It’s like watching the future reconfigure, like being in high school again, watching team after team fall to Oikawa’s faultless planning and shameless charm.

“I’ll get to watch a whole lot of volleyball,” Hajime says, and resigns himself to fate and/or Oikawa Tooru.

“Hey, when you get there, can you bag a gymnast for me?” Hanamaki asks, and Matsukawa squawks.

 Chasing Paper Suns, by carafin (10k. T. Future fic)

Again with the growing up and coming back together, this time with more angst than the last. Lovely, really lovely read. 

Post-high school, Oikawa makes it to the national volleyball team but Iwaizumi doesn't. The next three years become an exercise in growing up without growing apart.

Some days Hajime likes to think of himself as Oikawa’s counterpart—the two of them blending into a single devastating unit, the invincible setter and his unyielding ace, the bond between them unbreakable and true. Other days he feels like he is chasing after a rising sun, always running and running with his eyes fixed on the distance, trying to cross a chasm that stretches on without end, caught in an endless and exhausting pursuit.

 the yellow room, by ohhotlamb (14k. T. canonverse/future fic)

Makki and Mattsun see bullshit and call you out on your bullshit. 

“I told you, we broke up like six months ago. We’re not dating anymore.”

Hanamaki eyes him suspiciously. “You live together.”

“Yeah, so?”

“There are pictures of you two kissing stuck to your refrigerator.”

Hajime shrugs. “That wasn’t my idea. Anyways, they’re good pictures. Good lighting.”

 the river runs, by tothemoon (11k. T. post-breakup)

My heart ACHES. Happy ending, promise! Just read it. 

One year since their breakup, Oikawa Tooru starts a list of daily reminders, tips, and tricks called HOW TO FORGET ABOUT IWAIZUMI HAJIME, and he’s determined to make it stick.

—

This is a firsthand account of how to deal (and rather spectacularly, at that).

 I sure hope that guy gets fired, by Xov (29k. T. canonverse/time loop au)

The only thing better than one confession, is MULTIPLE confessions. Oikawa trusts Iwaizumi unshakably, and that's beautiful. 

It was the fourth time experiencing the exact same day that Iwaizumi Hajime reluctantly admitted to himself that something was very wrong. 

 my only friend was the man in the moon (until i met you), by ohhotlamb (7k. T. canonverse)

Just so innocent and sweet. Oikawa said ‘effort’.

In which Oikawa has a life-altering revelation, and Hajime is starting to think it involves him.  

 Bet On It, by originalblue (13k. E. canonverse)

Tooru being nice for a week? That can only end one way… with a d*ck in Hajime’s mouth. 

Hajime knows exactly how shitty Oikawa's personality is, and has no scruples whatsover about betting Oikawa six thousand yen that he can't be nice for an entire week. 

 especially for tender ones like us, by viverella (17k. T. canonverse/post break-up)

Gods! See? See what I mean? How could I forget about a work as heart wrenchingly beautiful as this? Give it some love, actually, all of the love. 

The worst part of it all, Tooru thinks to himself sometimes, is that even as they fought and kicked and screamed and tore each other to shreds, it was never that Tooru stopped loving Iwaizumi any less. The worst part of it all, he thinks, is that loving Iwaizumi turned out to not be enough.

(OR: on finding the right person at the wrong time and learning how to pick up the pieces)

 sunset town, by skiecas (33k. T. canon-divergent)

Another work that I just CANNOT understand why it doesn't have more hits. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. I almost cried. 

In the summer of 2020, Oikawa Tooru returns home from his first successful stint as captain of Japan’s national volleyball team. In one hand, he holds the undisputed weight of an Olympic medal, and in the other, his unresolved feelings for a childhood best friend.

Two years down the road, reconciling his lifelong dream with his lifelong love proves to be the greatest challenge.

 of odd numbers and intimate regrets, by bravely (commovente) (5k. T. post-canon/one night stand au)

Basically, Tooru and Hajime sleep together after not speaking for seven years and of course there’s feelings and angst and a belated chance at happiness and a life together. 

Tooru’s spent the last seven years of his life in a carefully constructed schedule that is, he realises now, as much a habit as it was a way to forget about the person in front of him.

[or, the one night stand AU between two people more than friends but not quite lovers, measuring the passage of time in distance and long-gone memories, the expansion and contraction of the spaces between their fingers each time.]

 cross my heart, open wide, by acchikocchi (7k. T. canonverse)

Super cute, super short. Realizing you're on a date with the wrong person one-shot. 

For a minute Hajime doesn't know what to say. Everything and nothing crowds his mind, leaving no room to think. That he's never tried this. That volleyball's over. That he's graduating in five months. That it would be really nice, at least once, to go on a date with a good-looking guy.

 Hajime goes on a date. It's not with Oikawa. 

 Fernweh, by oikawashoyo (19k. G. canonverse/post time skip)

A mature(ish) Tooru?? I love works that show Tooru growing and living happily in Argentina and this one is just beautiful. (Plus! Plus, Skai did a piece on it as well and I love ALL their work so you can visualize everything). Love it. 

Argentina is stretching out before him, an opportunity, a challenge. He is reminded of his losses, his insecurities, his disappointments; sees them form a tall, tall wall blocking his path to success. He takes a deep breath and knows he is going to shatter it.

In which Oikawa's whole life is spent longing for the horizon — in the form of a dream, a home, and a boy.

 i breathe easily in your arms, by orphan_account (2k. M. canonverse)

Soft, soft sex

When, after completing their high school graduation ceremony and heading home to enjoy their freedom, Oikawa had pulled him into his room and pressed his lips hesitantly against Iwaizumi’s own, it seemed an inevitable development in the unfolding narrative of their shared existence.

Despite years of having a bed to himself, the sensation of another body taking up space in his sheets, curling against his chest, creating warmth, feels natural in much the same way.

 old and new, by Mysecretfanmoments (5k. T. canon divergence)

Finally a fic where they don't freak out on confession and it's sweet. 

“You seem—sad.” Was that the right word? Others sprang to mind: desperate, lonely, anxious.

Tooru looked away. “Are you going to make me say it?”

“Say what?”

Tooru folded his arms, sighed. “I missed you, of course.”

Hajime swallowed.

“No need to look that way. I told you, I’m not one of your macho man buddies. I’m allowed to say stuff like that without being embarrassed—”

“You’re being ridiculous,” Hajime complained. “No need to be so defensive. I’ve missed you too.”

“Oh?” Tooru seemed to get a little of his own back, leaning forward on his elbows. “What about me did you miss?”

((Going to separate universities, Hajime and Tooru learn the true meaning of "distance makes the heart grow fonder"))

 all i wanted was you, by spaceburgers (6k. E. college/fwb au)

This was more emotional than I thought a 6k friends with benefits fic could be, okay? Okay. 

Wherein Hajime and Tooru are fuck buddies, Hajime curses his treacherous heart, and Tooru is bad with feelings. 

 we shine like diamonds, by whitemiists (26k. T. canon divergence)

I couldn't not include this work. It deals with internalized homophobia so well and I really resonate with it. 

In all seriousness, I’m very lucky to live in a country where my sexuality is widely accepted and my heart goes out the LGBTQIA+ peoples who are forced to hide themselves. You are loved and your sexuality and gender-identity are not wrong and never will be.  

Oikawa is nine when he first hears the word. The boys on the playground whisper it like it's dirty, like the way they daringly mutter the word fuck and then look over their shoulders to check their parents hadn't heard.

"You know Abe-kun from class?" they snicker, hands cupped around their mouths like they're passing along a filthy secret. "I hear his older brother is... gay."

 Look For Him, by Leryline (18k. E. canonverse)

A collection of kisses. I love Hajime’s grandmother. 

She laughs gently. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so heartbroken before, Hajime.”

Iwaizumi sighs and prods at the mackerel with a chopstick. “Sorry. I can’t help it. It’s just different, you know? Like Oikawa pissed me off so much that now he’s not here I don’t know what to do with myself.”

“But you weren’t always annoyed with him, were you?” his grandmother smiles serenely and takes a sip of her tea. “My, my, Hajime, old women see everything. I saw you out there with my finches, when you were kissing Tooru’s nose. Your mother and father used to do the very same thing, you know, when they were younger. And look how long they’ve lasted. I hope you and Tooru last, Hajime. He’s very good for you.”

-

Oikawa has kissed Iwaizumi more times than either of them can count; it’s a constant thing, their lips never really leaving the other’s skin. There are, however, times when they’ve kissed that are burned into their memories. Eight of them, to be precise.

 film reel life, arsenicjay (8k. T. canon divergence)

Such a unique and creative idea! Reading from the eyes of a camera, so beautiful!

The only person Iwaizumi is lying to is himself, when he insists: I am not in love with Oikawa Tooru. 

 how to let your planets align, by tether (tothemoon) (15k. T. end of the world au)

This is the only remotely non-happy ending fic I will be including on here, and it's purely because it's a gorgeous read. And yes, I ached. Your lips, my lips, apocalypse. 

It is the last day on earth, December 2nd, 1985, when you realize you're in love with him.

[summerpogue]

‘Paradise on Earth’ // Part Two

part two!! next part will be around the pilot, so we’ll be gettin’ into the action! I just wanted to build a lil backstory for reader first. I hope you enjoy! let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for this! Posting late, this hasn’t been edited yet!

Word Count: 2k+

Warnings: smoking, drinking, I can’t remember for sure but there’s prob cursing

part one

Gif Credit: @rudypankows​

Music flowed through the Chateau as Y/N sauntered out of the spare room, aka JJ’s room, towel drying her hair and subtly dancing along to the melodies of Hozier. She was currently decked out in JJ’s hoodie and board shorts as she stood in the living room and admired what she’d done. Having snuck over just past the asscrack of dawn after JJ and John B headed their separate ways for work, she got to work herself giving the Chateau a major facelift that included a deep cleaning, some new throw pillows, and a freshly stocked kitchen. She’d managed to finish with enough time to give herself a shower, washing away all the sweat and grime she’d accumulated over the course of revamping the disgusting bachelor pad. Her phone chimed with a text from John B just as she opened the front door for the pizza guy. 

‘Leaving figure 8 want me to get u?’

‘I’m actually out right now, meet you there?’

‘Sounds good 👍🏼’

She set the pizza boxes on the counter and gave the place a final look over as she sat on the edge of the couch to wait, but she began to grow impatient. Her left knee bounced erratically as she checked her watch every two minutes. She stood with a huff, walking to the kitchen and grabbing a slice, deciding not to wait for them anymore, and just as she took the first bite John B threw the front door open.

“Damn, how did you beat me?” He asked, head down as he came through the door and he let out a soft gasp when his eyes lifted from the doorknob, “oh my god, you did not.” He said, eyes scanning the room in amazement as he saw the place the cleanest it had ever been.

“I did! Welcome to your clean home!” She said in between bites, and she set her slice down as John B crossed the room and wrapped her in a bear hug. Pope and Kie were only seconds behind, muttering ‘holy shit’ in unison. John B kept an arm around her waist as he pulled away.

“I can’t even believe you did this, this is so nice.” He said and a grin overtook her features. 

“I wanted to John B, I want you and JJ to be taken care of.” She leaned up and pressed a kiss to his cheek and stepped past him to open the cabinet under the sink, “but you see this? These are all the new cleaning supplies I bought you, there are sticky notes on everything telling you how to use it, what to use it on, and how often. Please for the love of god utilize it because I saw some shit in here that will haunt my nightmares for the foreseeable future.”

He chuckled and put a hand on the back of his neck, “yeah, it was pretty bad wasn’t it?”

“What was pretty bad?” JJ asked, walking through the front door, “holy shit.”

“That’s what I said,” Pope replied. 

“Who did this, Y/N?” Everyone nodded and he crossed the room to give her a high five, “what the fuck, you’re so nice.” She let out a loud laugh.

“That’s the JJ version of ‘thank you’, I’m pretty sure,” Kie said, and as everyone laughed Y/N encouraged them to grab a slice. They migrated to the front porch food in hand, and before long they were down in the yard huddled around the fire-pit as the crickets sounded in the distance. Hues of red and orange illuminated each of their faces and their laughter echoed through the yard as Y/N effortlessly plucked the strings of her guitar delicately in the background. She smiled at JJ who was rolling a joint and he looked up at her, cheeks flushing when he noticed her gaze was already on him.

“What?” He asked, tongue flicking over the seam of the joint.

“Just checking your progress on that joint.” She smirked, and he chuckled before sticking it between his lips and lighting it.

“Just when I thought JJ smoked a lot of weed you came along and proved me wrong.” Pope said, eliciting a giggle from Y/N as she put her guitar down and accepted the joint from JJ, “and you’re so much more productive than him it doesn’t make sense.” She really laughed now, smoke puffing out of her nose at the unexpected jab at JJ.

“It’s the LA lifestyle, man.” She said, taking another hit, throwing on a cheesy grin and as Kie pointed a camera at her. This was life in the Outer Banks, and she loved it way more than she thought she would. Having come from such a vibrant and flowing city it was hard to adjust to the laid back pace of OBX, the friendly vibe throughout town where everyone knew everyone. She’d always secretly looked down on small-town life. When her dad moved she couldn’t even begin to wrap her mind around why he’d left but in the short six weeks she’d been here, she now knew all too well. The joint was gone as quick as it had been procured, having been shared between her, JJ and Kie and as Y/N laid against the cool ground she couldn’t help but smile as JJ followed. The two of them laid shoulder to shoulder looking up at the crystal clear sky, occasionally pitching into the conversation between their friends. 

“Hey… I know I didn’t properly say it earlier but, thank you for what you did today.” He said softly, tilting his head towards her slightly.

“What did I- oh! That,” the day had been so long that mixed with the beer and weed she’d honestly forgotten what her morning had entailed, “seriously it’s no big, I’m happy to do it.” She laid a hand on top of his, which were folded on his chest.

“I know, it’s just… you don’t have to take care of us, but I’m kind of glad you are, despite how damaging it is to my ego.”

“If it helps you can think of it as benefiting from the Kook lifestyle that’s shit on you for so many years?” She asked and everyone laughed out loud, she hadn’t realized the other three were tuned into their conversation.

“She makes a good point, JJ.” John B said, and they both sat up, “but that doesn’t mean we’ll ever stop being grateful.” 

“You wanna know how you guys can thank me?” She asked, and they both nodded their heads, “can I crash here tonight? I’m too tired and buzzed to drive at the moment.”

“Oh, yeah. You can crash here whenever you want, you don’t have to ask.” John B said almost dismissively as if he was amused by her simple request. As if on cue she was wracked with a massive yawn that she tried to hide by burying her face in her sweater paws.

“I’m pretty sure that was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen,” Kie said, snapping another picture of her and somewhere in the back of her sleepy mind she thought about how grateful she was to have friends that photographed everything not for their Instagrams but for each other, so they would always remember these summer nights.

“Yeah, same.” Pope agreed, the two of them were looking at her like she was a puppy and she giggled as she hid her face again.

“Come on, sleepy one. I’ll help you to bed.” JJ said, standing and holding his hands out to her. She stood and waved her hand and the mess they’d left, making a mental note to deal with it in the morning and bid goodnight to everyone. 

“He’s so whipped already,” Pope whispered and everyone started snickering. Y/N was too tired to have heard, and if she had she wouldn’t have been able to process it anyway, but JJ heard loud and clear and flipped them the bird over his shoulder. His hand guided her by the small of her back as they walked through the house and after sending her down the hallway he grabbed her a glass of water from the kitchen. Her footsteps were practically shuffles as she approached JJ’s bed and kicked her shoes off. She threw the blankets back and crawled in, tugging the blankets on as she tried to cocoon herself in comfort. JJ entered the room and chuckled as he saw her, and she sat right back up with a soft smile when she saw him.

“Thank you,” she said before taking a sip and as she set the glass on the nightstand she watched JJ fidget awkwardly through her heavy lids.

“Alright, well I’ll leave you-”

“Stay with me?” She interrupted, patting the mattress beside her.

“Oh, it’s okay… you don’t have to- I don’t mind sleeping on the couch.”

“JJ.” She said, looking at him deadpan as she lifted the covers, “it’s just two friends sharing a bed.” She said and she smiled as he slid in next to her, “plus, I really hate sleeping alone.” They settled in, and for the first time in a long time, JJ felt nervous. It wasn’t the first time he’d had a beautiful girl next to him in bed, but it was the first time he’d had Y/N in his bed and it felt… right. 

“I’ll deny it if you say anything, but… me too.” He lifted his arm and she immediately snuggled into his chest, exhaling as she relaxed against him. “You’re pretty amazing, you know that?”

She sighed dramatically, “yeah, it’s about time you mention it.” She giggled, “don’t get all sappy on me now, JJ.”

“I’m not, I’m not.” He playfully swatted the arm that was draped across him, “so, check-in. How you likin’ Pogue Life?”

“I love it, I feel… I don’t know, free? I guess I’ve never really known what real friends feel like. I’ve only known you guys for a couple of weeks, but like... I’d definitely hide some bodies for you guys.” She joked, “every time I came to visit my dad I thought this place was Boringville, USA, but I guess I never really explored past Figure 8.”

“Most Kooks don’t, don’t feel bad for overlooking the splendors of the Cut.”

“I’m pretty sure this is the most comfortable I’ve ever been.” If she was a cat, she was certain she’d be purring and JJ looked down at her, taking in her lopsided smile and closed eyes.

“How stoned are you?”

“10.” He shook his head and laughed, “maybe 11.” 

“Stoned enough to forget Pogue rules?” He asked, half-teasing as his fingers began tickling her sides and she squealed as she tried to turn away from him. Her laughter was filling the room and flowing out the open window into the humid night as she tried her hardest to fight off his attacks.

Outside the three shared a look and John B took a sip of his beer with raised eyebrows, “well, at least they’re not fucking?” 

“At least I hope not,” Pope said with a grimace as another bought of laughter floated through the breeze, and Kie downed the rest of her beer before turning the music up a little to offset the sound coming from the back of the house. 

JJ finally relented, giving her a chance to catch her breath as she wiped the tears that were streaming down her cheeks from laughing. She turned her body away from him, pretending to be upset and he chuckled as he pressed against her, laughing again when her body jerked feeling his arm move over her waist, bracing for another onslaught of torture.

“I come in peace.” He whispered and she relaxed against him. 

“You’re evil.” She muttered, eyes drifting closed as sleep began to tug at her mind.

“You’re exhausted, get some sleep.” She took a deep breath, exhaling as she snuggled back against him, her hand finding his under the covers. 

“You get some sleep.” She said, trying to be sharp and teasing but the words came out slurred and raspy as she fought for the last shreds of consciousness.

“I will, just as soon as you do, sweetheart.”

She hummed, “alright. Goodnight, JJ.”

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

--

[wittystarkk]

The Last Five Years || Bucky Barnes || Part Eight

author: wittystarkk

word count: 2k

relationship: James “Bucky” Barnes/Reader

warnings: none.

song: The Next Ten Minutes

Previous Chapter - Next Chapter

Bucky walked slowly beside (Y/N), their hands intertwined with each other. Their fingers were locked tightly together, their hands swinging a little with every step that the two of them took. Their heads were on a slow swivel, glancing around Central Park as they progressed deeper along the foliage covered pathway. It was late summer, and the air was starting to get the crisp taste of fall to it. Her skin prickled with goosebumps every time a gust of wind danced over her skin. The floral dress she wore didn’t proved her with much coverage, though she was still proud to show off the outfit she’d made.

He stopped when she did, following her line of sight up to the building on the left that was overlooking Central park. “Is that one John Lennon?” She asked, narrowing her eyes at the building. The two of them had decided to take a stroll earlier that day and on the short cab ride down to the park he’d told her about the many celebrity apartments that looked down on the park. She was excited to figure them out.

“No,” he chuckled. “That one’s Jerry Seinfeld.” He nodded to the building next to the one their eyes were currently trained on, smiling a little. “That one’s John Lennon, there.”

She pursed her lips, amused by his knowledge. He’d told her that he’d read about the apartments in a magazine or something, and she was glad he was sharing this knowledge with her. It was a silly little thing, but it still made her happy. The lake was just in front of them, and she could smell the stale water already. The two resumed their walk, arms swinging more than before. “Is that the San Remo?” She asked of an apartment building to the right.

“No, the Dakota. The San Remo’s up a few blocks, that way.” He pointed forward, indicating the direction to her. She nodded, smiling softly as she took everything in. He watched her out of the corner of his eye as they walked, trying to keep himself from smiling like a fool. “Have you ever been inside of the museum?”

She shook her head, frowning a bit. “I always inended to go. Just never had the time or the company.”

“We should go,” Bucky suggested. “See the dinosaur bones, they’re rather massive. It’s impressive. And the artifacts are fascinating.”

She smirked, “you’re such a nerd.”

He could tell by the expression on her face that she was happy. A real, deep happiness that she didn’t have to try to show. It was evident in her eyes, in the upturn of her lips, in the pep of her step. He’d catch these glimpses of happiness when they were together and it would remind him why he loved her, why they were his happy ending.

Their hands swung as they walked, following the parks path. They wound around a bend, slowing their stride as they neared a gazebo. “Should we take a break and sit in here for a bit?”

“We could have our picnic there?” She offered, indicating the basket he’d been carrying in the hand that wasn’t holding hers. “I think it’d be nice. We can put the blanket out, be cool and protected from the sun.”

Bucky gave her a sincere smile, “I think that’s a great idea, babe.” The two dropped hands, ascending the steps of the gazebo. He set the basket down and took the blanket off of the top. She waited for him to splay it out before getting out the picnic contents, setting them atop the blanket to keep it weighted down against the soft breeze.

The two crossed their legs underneath themselves as they sat on opposite sides of the blanket, (Y/N) busying herself with unwrapping the plates. He watched her with a soft smile, still on his lips, amazed that she was his.

She glanced up from what she was doing, furrowing her brows at him. “Why are you staring at me?”

“Cause you’re beautiful.”

She rolled her eyes, but he caught her smiling as she looked back down, returning her attention to her task. “Can I ask you something?” He wondered, beginning to peel the wrapping off of the wine bottle.

“Of course,” she replied, dishing the food up for the two of them.

“Would you share your life with me?” He wondered, keeping his attention on the wine bottle. “For the next ten minutes, at least.”

“Hmm?”

He sighed, “I asked if you’d share your life with me, for the next ten minutes. Figured we could handle that.”

“We’ve been dating for two years, Bucky.” She sighed, returning her attention to the picnic happenings. “I think we’ve more than shown we can handle ten minutes, and I’ve shared my life with you for a much longer period of time than that.”

He cleared his throat a little, “would you just allow me this?”

“What ten minutes? Okay.”

He smiled, pushing up to stand, offering her his hand. She was hesitant for a moment before accepting it, allowing him to help her stand. “If you agree to these next ten minutes then I might be compelled to ask you for more."

"More minutes?" She wondered, allowing him to spin her around by her hand. "I am afraid I can only give you like, maybe the one set of ten."

He rolled his eyes but his smile didn't falter. "There are just, so many things I want to do with you. So many dreams and stories and lives that I need to experience with you."

She allowed him to wrap his arm around your waist, keeping your hand in his. "My life wouldn't be complete without you," he finished his thought, dancing around with her slowly, humming softly under his breath.

"What are you trying to say, Bucky?" She asked with mild confusion and an air of concern to her voice. She looked worried, nearly. Eyes a little bigger than normal, staring up at him.

He stopped humming, dropping her hand from his. "I'm asking you for ten more minutes," he replied, dropping slowly to his knee. "I'm asking you for a lifetime of ten more minutes, babe."

She swallowed hard, eyes frantically scanning over his face. "Bucky," she whispered. "Are you -"

He nodded, reaching into the back pocket of his jeans to retrieve a small envelope. He carefully opened it and allowed the ring to drop into his palm. He took in a deep breath, holding the ring up to her, the light hitting it just right to make it shine. "Will you marry me?"

Her mouth dropped, heart picking up speed as her breath caught in her throat. "I know that it's longer than ten minutes, but... I think we can handle this."

She was silent, looking slowly between the ring and him, her mind going a mile a minute. He began to worry, face falling. The corners of his mouth drooped from the wide smile they once held, his throat feeling like it was going to close. He held the ring a little tighter but lowered his hand. "If.. If this isn't something you want, you can tell me."

This snapped her out of her spell, her brain restarting, finding her voice. "No!" She replied, answering his question.

He took a sharp breath in, retreating from her like he'd been slapped.

"Oh," he whispered, swallowing hard while he nodded his head. "Of course."

She quickly shook her head, processing what she'd just done. "No! I mean, no, it is something I want." She cupped his face delicately in her hands. "I'm sorry, I'm not always on time." She winked. "But you don't expect that from me. Right?" She leaned forward to kiss him softly.

"I want to be your wife," she whispered when she pulled away from the kiss, lowering herself to her knees to be level with him. "I want to bear your child. Hell. I want to one day die knowing I've had a long, full and happy life in your arms. I want your next ten minutes, and then ten after that, until we both run out of minutes to give." She leaned forward to give him another kiss, stroking his cheekbones with her thumbs gently.

His arms instinctively wrapped around her, clutching her tightly to his body. She wound her arms around his neck, "I don't know how people survive in this world without someone like you, Bucky."

"Are you saying yes?"

"I'm saying yes," she nodded, pulling back just enough to look him in his eyes. "I'm saying I won't be complete until I walk down the aisle and get to say 'I do' to you. I'm saying that I will give you my entire lifetime, baby."

His lips pulled back into a nearly painful smile as he released her from his arms, offering her the ring he'd still been clutching in his hand. She held her hand up, curling all but her third finger against her hand. He bit his lip, slowly sliding the ring down her finger until it nestled perfectly at the base. She extended all of her fingers then, processing the way the ring looked on her finger. Accepting the way it felt right to be receiving it from Bucky.

In that moment, sitting on her knees on the gazebo with the love of her life, everything felt right. Everything felt like it had finally fallen into place. She loved Bucky, and she knew wholeheartedly then that he loved her, too. That he was giving her just as much as she was giving him. All was good. They were good. She cupped his cheek with her hand again, giving him another soft kiss. "I love you," she whispered to him against his lips.

His hands rubbed softly over her back, "I love you too. Forever."

[rainbowdashisthebest1]

Winteriron fic recs

This is a fic rec list of some of my favorite Bucky/Tony fanfiction!

They are organized and numbered in order from shortest to longest (1k-167k). There is a collective total of 36 fics on this list.

All are located on ao3 (Archive of our Own).

The word count is listed underneath the title. (for example, 14k is the same as fourteen thousand words).

I have tried my best to avoid any stories with Major Character Death or an Unhappy Ending. So you don't need to worry about those here!

If they have a little star (*) that means they are some of the more memorable ones that I have read.

ENJOY!

1~killer love

1k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/20646356

“Nice to finally meet you in person," Bucky said. "If you’re anything like you were over text, I think we’ll get along just fine.”

“More or less,” Tony shrugged playfully. “Just with a little more murder.”

Something dark passed over Bucky’s face, there and gone in an instant. “Murder?” he asked.

“I’m a mystery writer,” Tony explained, hands waving. “That’s why my search history was so bizarre, you know? Gotta do my research and all that. What do you do?”

“I work in forensics,” Bucky replied after a beat.

Tony breathed out a sigh of relief. “Oh, good,” he said. “For a second there, I thought you were a serial killer or something.”

2~Like me better

1k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17636204

For almost a fraction of a second, Tony thinks this is it – Barnes isn’t attractive anymore, he’s not some badass bad boy; he’s a giant squishy nerd – he isn’t hot. I don’t want to take his pants off with my teeth, I don’t want to lick my way down his body and I don’t want him hoisting me up and fucking me against a wall – no, sir, I – am a giant fucking liar.

3~suicidal stolen art

1k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/20134036

Tony was going to kill Bucky Barnes. Tony was going to cut the other thief’s flesh arm off and beat him with it. It was bad enough that they were both running jobs in the same building, but they had to be going for the same necklace, too.

Really, the universe hated Tony. He stared at the ceiling, sending up a very nasty prayer in case someone was listening, then turned back to the job at hand.

4~Bad Days

1k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/11971314

Bucky likes Tony, but is too scared to tell him. What he doesn't know is that every time he has a "winter soldier" moment, he is constantly protecting tony and not letting anyone near him, so tony already knows that Bucky likes him ("genius, remember?"). Bucky finally gets up the courage to talk to Tony, only for Tony to tell him what's been going on and he's been waiting for Bucky to be comfortable enough to actually tell him.

5~Bad Scoping Mechanisms

2k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20607554

Like, the general public hates Tony Stark for having been a weapons manufacturer but actually he was pretty popular while he was still in the weapons industry so one wonders, who would have been a fan of Stark Industries before Afghanistan? Military, alphabet agencies, private security, hitmen and assassins? ...Hydra assassins?

-In which the Winter Soldier, aka Bucky Barnes, is an avid fan of Tony Stark for reasons.-

6~Sometimes Life Happens

2k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/4376774 Prompt: Imagine Tony and Bucky where Bucky works for the Russian mob and he hijacks Tony's car with Tony still in it to run from the cops. Tony wants to be mad, but really, he was sort of bored anyways and hang on, this guy's deadly, hot, and he has an awesome f*cking arm. Maybe this hostage thing isn't so bad after all.

Tony hadn’t necessarily been looking for further proof of his maladjusted—one might even argue self-destructive—approach to problems, but sometimes life happened, and you didn’t have any choice but to take a long, hard look at yourself. Sometimes, you’re sitting in your car, staring into your recently emptied coffee cup, contemplating whether or not you really want to do this whole “leading a responsible life” thing anymore, and a guy with a gun slides into your passenger seat. Sometimes, that’s just the way your Monday goes.

7~Tell Me Your Name, I Need To Know

2k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19907770

Tony is overworked and underappreciated, always pushing his limits and not taking care of himself well; but someone decides to take care of Tony for a change.

Tony just wishes he knew who it was.

8~Nightmare Dressed Like a Daydream 

3k https://archiveofourown.org/works/17322914 Bucky accidentally crashes a blind date and he's not all that sorry about it.

9~Arm(s) Dealer

3k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/20869010

Just Tony being totally oblivious of Bucky being his fanboy and Bucky trying to 'play it cool' and kind of failing at it and coming across as kind of a weirdo.

-In which Tony slowly but surely realizes Bucky is his biggest fan. Slowly though.-

10~Warmth 

3k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10543758 The day Bucky realizes that the Winter Soldier is in love with Tony Stark, he nearly brains himself on the doorway between his room and the rest of Stevie’s floor.

Because that’s the thing, he’s somehow not noticed, despite sharing a headspace with him. It’s been a team-wide question since Bucky came in from the cold as to why the Soldier spends so much time with Stark, and even Bucky’s been unable to answer, though now he’s just unwilling. The Soldier is in love with Stark. He’s the sun, the Soldier thinks. How the hell is this Bucky’s life?

11~How to Survive a Haunted House

4k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19070833

“Lord save me from crazy white boys,” were probably going to be Rhodey’s last words. He didn’t care what his friend said; this place was haunted, and they were both gonna end up dead because Tony was too taken in by the ample closet space.

A fanfiction based on a popular twitter thread.

12~How to get away with (murder) Tony*

4K

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/13516308 All Bucky wants is five minutes alone with Tony - is that really too much to ask? Yes, it is, at least according to the rest of the Avengers that made it their mission to never leave him alone with the engineer for whatever reason. So if he ever wants to make his moves, he's going to have to employ every single one of his assassin training techniques and more. And he better do it fast, before the annoyed Winter Soldier takes over and just kills the meddling fools. Naturally, Tony is completely oblivious to the entire situation until a mysterious note leads him to the most unlikely of places - McDonald's.

13~forgiveness (can you imagine)

4k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17585558

bucky gets called back to the states so the man whose parents he killed can help him fix what has been unmade

he never expected tony stark's massive capacity for forgiveness to remake him

14~Not a Competition

5k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/16951419

Steve Rogers has been trying to force himself back into Tony's life, despite the fact that Tony no longer wants him there. Bucky makes some mistakes but tries his best to keep Tony safe and away from Steve's unwanted advances.

Features clear communication between Bucky and Tony, Tony learning about healthy relationships, a realistic approach to jealousy, and a potential bash down of Captain America.

15~These Sleepless Nights of Ours

6k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/19971652

It's another sleepless night and no one is around to keep Tony company. That is until he wanders into the Compound gardens and finds an insomniac Winter Soldier in desperate need of a hug.

16~Today's Forecast*

7k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/6830737

Loneliness had followed Tony Stark his entire life, so they were on pretty good terms. Ignoring those empty places inside of himself was easier once the day was in full swing, but the mornings had a way of slipping a knife between his ribs and getting him right in the heart.

The last place Tony expected to find the cure for his condition was on TV, but now watching the morning weather report has become the highlight of his day. Well, it was less the weather, and more the weatherman. One look at Bucky Barnes making some adorably lame joke about umbrellas, all lopsided smile and sparkling eyes, and Tony was in love.

17~This Ship (Ain't Never Ginna Sink)*

7k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7939663/chapters/18149251

HYDRA kidnaps Tony Stark. What happens next should be obvious—the torture, the snark, the dramatic rescue. You know, the usual. Except.

Except Bix—the newest self-proclaimed faceless HYDRA goon—really ships WinterIron.

Or: Why faceless HYDRA goons aren’t allowed to have a Tumblr account.

18~The Gift Of Care

8k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/19908034

Freshly back to the States, James Barnes has a lot to learn about his new world, so he watches and learns and finds himself slowly falling for one Tony Stark, who always appears miserable when he has to spend time at the Compound with his former teammates, but who still takes the time to treat James with kindness.

James sets out on a mission to take care of Tony, make Tony’s life easier in whatever small ways he can. An unfortunate misunderstanding nearly ruins that, but in the end, James still reaps the rewards of his secret good deeds.

19~The Art of Petty Theft

8k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15943550

All Tony needs right now is a good night’s sleep, but with nightmares nipping at his heels, he can’t do it without his sweatshirt— Rhodey’s sweatshirt, technically, that had become Tony’s long ago, back in their MIT days. The sweatshirt had kept him warm, cozy, and safe through many bad nights, but now it’s missing and when Tony finds out which one of his teammates is a no-good clothes thief, oh, they were going to have words.

20~Merry Kissmas

8k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/5368094

In which all Bucky wants for Christmas is a certain genius superhero, and for the rest of their teammates to stop hanging mistletoe and kissing said genius, thank you very much.

21~The Voice Inside My Head

9k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12253551/chapters/27844158

The Soldier is overly protective of Tony after the rogue Avengers come back, forcing his way out when the slightest thing happens to him, so it's a problem when Steve doesn't know when to stop.

22~Whatever you say darling

9k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/6942853

Tony has been trying to woo Bucky for about a year now. He flirts, he builds him things, he kisses him on the cheek after movie nights and does almost everything he can think of to convince the guy that he really wants to date him. Bucky is strangely steadfast in his answer though: No, they can't date. After an explosive argument about the issue, Tony leaves the Tower for Malibu, making the team wary of a moody Bucky. When he comes back after two weeks, things are a bit...different.

Tony is actually doing exactly what Bucky asks. And it is creeping the team out while making Bucky go crazy.

23~Phase Change

10k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16336445/chapters/38220197

The man who used to be both Bucky Barnes and the Winter Soldier but now neither has to figure out who he is and what he wants, with a little prodding from Tony along the way.

24~by any other name

10k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14944860/chapters/34627725

He hates 'Bucky', hates the man, hates the way it makes his skin crawl and his chest ache.

Hates hearing that name thrown around so cavalier. Hates the image it evokes.

But he can't do anything about it. His tongue is leaden, his tongue sour with disgust, and he's unable to push out the words.

Until Tony Stark rages a one-man war against 'Bucky Barnes'.

Or, the 5 times Tony rejected 'Bucky’ and the 1 time James did.

25~Let It Grow 

10k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15711483

When Tony steps inside a random flower shop on pure impulse, he doesn't expect to find himself face to face with the hottest florist he has ever seen. Sure, the guy is also the snarkiest florist he has ever seen, but Tony wouldn't consider that a bad thing. Bucky is clever, funny, and can keep up with Tony's banter better than most, and maybe Tony becomes a little bit infatuated with the man, right then and there.

And maybe Tony ends up going back to that same flower shop, time and time again, just to talk to Bucky. That's not weird at all.

He can always pretend it's for the flowers.

26~Speed Dating (Isn't Supposed to Happen in Cars)*

11k https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/19388686 Tony's temporarily broke due to a scandal at Stark Industries, and with no one willing to hire him, he's got to get creative in how to get by. When he reads about a solar-powered car race that pays out in the millions, he knows he can win it. He just needs a car, all the parts, a racing team, a sponsor, a driver, and like a gajillion other things he does not have. What he does have is: one whole month, an Air Force pilot, an heiress, two enthusiastic teenagers, a discredited science teacher, three ex-cons, a high-tech robot disguised as a Roomba, and a wicked crush on the guy from YouTube. Seriously, how can he lose?

27~And Time Again

11k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/21033113

When Bucky starts acting strange — well, stranger than usual — Tony notices right away. Their friendship might still be new, but he likes to think that he's gotten to know Bucky pretty well by then. The problem is that Bucky doesn't want to tell Tony what's wrong, even when he asks. He dodges Tony's questions, saying everything is fine.

But the way Bucky keeps looking at Tony — as if he expects him to disappear the moment he turns his back — says otherwise.

And Tony is determined to get to the bottom of what's really going on.

28~Spring is Coming

12k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17709014/chapters/41776952

When Tony returns to Earth, he finds out that Bucky Barnes died in the Decimation.

The Winter Soldier, however, did not.

29~Weekly love

12k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11095257/chapters/24754530

Steve flicks him off and Bucky shuts his mouth. “Anyway, so what about Monday?”

Sam leans his hip on the table. “It’s about Stark.”

Bucky almost snorts at that. At MIT almost everything comes back to Tony Stark one way or the other.

Sam stares at him and Bucky clears his throat only then Sam continues.

“Every Monday Stark agrees to go out with the first person who asks him out.” Then he adds, “for a week.”

Bucky makes a face at that, mumbling ‘damn playboy’ under his nose.

Steve shakes his head at his antics. “Unless they have no chance to ask him out then they have to wait another week to try.”

“Mondays are exclusive, any other day and Stark will turn them down harshly.”

“Yep.” Steve nods then stretches, his eyes become a bit distant. “And at the end of the week, he will break up with that person saying: I couldn’t fall in love with you. Let’s break up.”

30~Misremembered

14k

https://www.archiveofourown.org/works/11046240

When Loki smirked at Rogers in the middle of a battle and told him he would give Rogers what he wanted most in the world, the mind of his old friend back, Tony had a very bad feeling.

31~Scars

26k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/4799096/chapters/10983695

When Tony tried to urge the homeless guy sleeping on the steps of the Tower’s loading dock to move, he never expected that he'd found Hydra’s pet assassin—James "Bucky" Barnes.

Now, after months of keeping his presence a secret from the Avengers and helping Barnes learn to cope with both his returning memories and the modern world, Hydra is back for their favorite toy and Tony must call in old friends to save the life of the man he just might have come to care for a little too much.

32~Hate Me

45k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17054348/chapters/40099106

There were moments where Bucky wondered what could have made Iron Man, possibly his best friend here in the future, sarcastic and gentle and funny and caring, hate Tony Stark so much. Moments where he wondered what Tony Stark, who could manage to be kind and generous to the assassin who had murdered his parents, could have done to Iron Man. But he never dared to ask, afraid of the answer.

33~Fractures (Filled With Liquid Gold)

63k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10913913/chapters/24268908

Ultron happened. The Avengers left.

Tony is fine with being alone again. He always worked better as a Lone Wolf than a team player anyway. He's not sleeping or eating or resting or... living, but it's fine. It's good. It's okay.

And then there's James.

34~Far from Heaven*

67k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13808031/chapters/31748817

Bucky Barnes falls asleep with the man he loves in his arms. In their bed, in their home, safe and sound.

He wakes up in the cold room of the cryostasis chamber in Wakanda to the worried faces of his former best friend and King T'Challa.

Everything that happened in the past six months— his pardon, his recovery, Tony's forgiveness, falling in love— he's told it was nothing more than a fevered dream, conjured up by a broken mind in cryostasis sleep.

The second chance at life he worked so hard to embrace. A newfound family and a place to call home. Tony, the love of his life and his whole world. All gone in a blink.

Bucky Barnes breaks.

35~Dig No Graves

142k WIP

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11633517/chapters/26163312

"I'm here to kill you, Terminator," Tony said slowly, "does that compute?"

The soldier looked up at him with wide blue eyes and no expression. "Okay."

Tony froze. "Okay," he echoed. "I tell you I came here to kill you and your response is 'okay'?"

"I am being decommissioned," the soldier said, and for one horrible moment, Tony thought he actually seemed relieved. "I understand. I will comply."

(Or; Tony learns the Winter Soldier killed his parents and goes on a search for revenge, but ends up learning how to heal instead)

36~Such Sweet Revenge*

167k

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15146219/chapters/35123417

When the Rogues are back in the States after being pardoned, the New Avengers want nothing to do with them and as far as Tony is concerned, if he never speaks to them again, it'll be too soon. After all, he didn't spend the last year putting himself (and his family) back together only for his former co-workers to ruin all of his hard work.

But then he gets a hand-written letter from the Winter Soldier himself, apologizing for the events that transpired and an off-handed comment from Rhodey about Rogers failing to take care of an obviously miserable Bucky Barnes sets in motion Tony's new, oh-so-evil plan to get some payback.

After all, what better revenge than to steal the Winter Soldier away from his best friend?

The only problem: Tony sucks at being vengeful, but apparently he's an expert at inadvertently falling in love.

[sukkadeservedbetter]

Edge Of A Thunderstorm

Pairing: Tom Holland X Reader

Summary: A chance encounter during a thunderstorm leaves you freezing, caffeinated, and starstruck. 

Warnings: light swearing, brief mentions of drinking

Word Count: 2K

“Alright, I’m heading home,” You say to your co-workers as you place your laptop into your bag and grab your umbrella.

“You’re walking?” One of them asks in astonishment. “In this weather? Girl, call a cab.” You roll your eyes playfully.

“I can handle a little rain and we’re not that far from my apartment. I’ll be fine.”

“Okay,” they sing. “Catch you Monday!”

“See you!”

Turns out, you can’t handle this rain. Rain is one thing, but this? This is insane. The wind blows your umbrella so hard that you’re exhausted after just five minutes of walking. As you squint out into the grey, you can’t be sure which direction the rain is coming from. Cars speed past you, splashing you with the pools of water that were collecting below the curb. Thunder rolls above you and soon enough white flashes through the sky. You’re soaked and miserable. Okay, enough! This is ridiculous, you tell yourself as you run under a brown awning for momentary shelter.

You shutter under your coat and try to shake your hands dry enough so you can reach for your phone. Your fingers fumble over the keys. You open the Uber app and wait for a driver. You look up and see a figure through the grey, running for cover much like you had moments before.

“Jesus, this storm is ridiculous,” the man says from underneath multiple jackets and a hoodie as he reached the awning.

“Yeah, tell me about it. You would think people like us would listen to the weather channel,” You pity-laugh as you spoke.

“An inch of rain, my ass.” You laugh at the man’s comment, still looking down at your phone, hoping for anyone to pick up your ride request.

“I’d wager it’s closer to two,” You comment nonchalantly. Your phone buzzes in your frozen hand: Your driver will arrive in 59 minutes. You groan internally, debating whether the walk would really be all that bad. Thunder crashes simultaneously with a bright white flash of lightning. You jump and yelp, earning yourself a chuckle from the man next to you.

“Scared of a little thunder?” He asks.

“That one just caught me off guard,” You reply.

“I’m sorry to trouble you, but could I possibly borrow your phone? Seems mine is dead and I’d really like to call a cab.”

“Oh, um, sure!” You say, handing the stranger your phone. “Let me know the wait time if you get through. Uber said it’s going to take at least an hour.”

“That blows. I’ll let you know.” You absentmindedly tap your foot as the stranger uses your phone. Something about his voice is familiar, but you can’t place it. The accent throws you off. “The lines are busy.”

“Hm?” You ask, realizing you had zoned out.

“The lines are busy. Looks like I’m stuck here.” He says.

“You would think Ubers and Cabs would be better equipped to handle rainy days. I know they’re probably busy but it’s a little annoying.”

“Yeah, and you would think they would employ more people for high volume days,” He says. You nod in agreement. “Oh well, I think I’m going to head inside and grab a cup of coffee while I wait for the storm to settle; do you want to join me?” The man tentatively asks. You look at the building behind you, realizing for the first time that it was a small cafe.

“Oh, sure!” The man holds the door open for you and you step inside to the heat and the faint smell of coffee grinds. You turn around to thank the man for holding the door for you but words don’t reach your mouth. The man had taken his hood off and you finally realize why you recognized his voice. Spider-man was standing in front of you. His real name was escaping you in the shock that Spider-man had just asked you to get coffee with him. He gives you a cheeky smile as he walks past you to the counter.

“I’ll have a medium coffee and…” He pauses as he looks back at you. You’re still standing by the door, mouth slightly ajar at your realization. “Whatever she’s having.”

“What? You don’t have to do that!” You stutter out.

“Hey, it’s the last I can do. You let me borrow your phone.” You know that those two didn’t quite match up, but you let it slide because it had been a while since a cute boy offered to buy you a coffee and how often do people like you get to hang out with a superhero? You walk up next to him and read the menu.

“A medium vanilla latte, please,” You tell the barista. You and Spider-man walk to a small, mosaic table in the center of the cafe. The soft yellow glow of the overhead lights makes the room feel warmer than it actually is. You feel bad calling the man in front of you Spider-man in your head, but you can’t, for the life of you, remember his real name. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think I caught your name.”

“Oh,” He responds, slightly taken back by the question, like he expected you to already know. His eyes light up. “It’s uh, Tom.” You make a split-second decision to not make a big deal of his fame, a decision that you thanked yourself for making later.

“Nice to meet you, Uh-Tom. I’m (Y/N).” You throw in a cheeky smile as you bring your vanilla latte to your thawing lips. Tom laughs at your bad joke.

“So, where were you headed when the storm hit?” Tom asked.

“Home. I live about a mile and a half away. What about you?”

“My mate Harrison’s house. We were supposed to grab drinks. That’s obviously not gonna happen.”

“I don’t think binge drinking and massive storms really go together,” You muse.

“You obviously don’t hang out with the right kind of people.”

“Oh? And what do the ‘right kind of people’ do when they blackout and can’t figure out how to get home at the end of the night?” You ask.

“They wake up in a dumpster the next morning with one hell of a story to tell.” Tom shoots you a grin and you snort.

“Oh my, God. I’m so sorry.” You bring your hand over your mouth as if that would stop the noise that had already come out. Your face burns red hot and you sink lower into your chair. Tom bursts out laughing, tears nearly spilling from his eyes. “Tom! Stop laughing!” You whine.

“Aw, don’t get embarrassed. That was adorable.”

“That was horrendous,” You disagree. “So, what do you do?” You ask, even though you know the answer, hoping to change the subject.

“I’m an actor,” Tom smiles.

“What kind of an actor?” You ask. “Like a ‘starving artist’ actor? A ‘I have to bus tables in between plays’ actor? Or a ‘I’m the next Brad Pitt’ actor?” You were loving watching Tom laughing at your comments. It’s nice to know someone thinks I’m funny, you think to yourself.

“Hm,” Tom thinks. “Somewhere in between starving artist and Brad Pitt.”

“Been in anything I might have seen?” You ask. You’re teasing Tom and he has no idea. Where did all the confidence come from? Who am I? You ask yourself.

“Depends.”

“On?”

“Your opinion on superheros,” Tom says. He doesn’t meet your eyes.

“Tobey Maguire was better,” You deadpan. Tom’s head snaps up.

“You knew?!” Tom nearly yells, but he’s smiling wide.

“Of course I knew, Dude! Marvel’s marketing isn’t exactly subtle; your face was plastered everywhere earlier this year.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Tom asks with a laugh.

“Didn’t seem important until now.” You shrug. “Besides, I liked watching you try to conceal your real identity. It was very Peter Parker of you.” Tom laughs again.

“So, you’re a fan?”

“Kind of! I mean, I like the movies but I’m not, like, writing smutty Loki fan fiction in my free time, you know?”

“Gotcha. That Loki fanfic gets…” Tom trails off.

“Fucking wild,” You finish his thought for him.

“Exactly. Do you, uh, do you really think Tobey is better?”

“What will you do if I say yes?”

“Cry,” Tom jokes. “Sue, maybe.”

“I can’t afford to be sued by you, and I’d feel pretty bad if I made you cry, so let’s just say Andrew was the best and call it a night.” You raise your eyebrows at Tom.

“Oh, fuck off!” Tom quips. The two of you continue to talk well into the nigh. You blow through an array of topics and Tom tells  you stories that have you laughing so hard you cry. You don’t even realize how much time has past until the barista walks up to your table.

“Hey,” She rudely interrupts you telling Tom about the most embarrassing date you had ever been on. “We’re closing up.” You and Tom exchange a glance of terror and confusion. Have you really been here for four hours? You look towards the window, expecting to see grey. Instead you only see black with blurry bright lights peeping through the window.  

“Have we?” You ask.

“There’s no way…” Tom responds. You both stare at each other for a moment before you both bust out into laughter. Tom grabs your empty cup and stands up, walking to the trash. As you stand, a moment of sadness hit you. The last fours hours with Tom have been the most entertaining and carefree hours you have had in years, but Tom is a celebrity. Tom is Spider-Man for God’s sake. What would he want with you?

“So I had-” “Can I get your-” You and Tom speak simultaneously.

“Sorry you go,” Tom says.

“No, really, you go!” You encourage.

“Um, okay. Can I get your number?” Tom ask/.

“Seriously?” You squeak out.

“Are you seriously questioning it? Yes, seriously. I’d like to take you out sometime when we’re both not sopping wet and exhausted… if that’s okay.”

“Y-yeah! Of course! Here put your number in my phone and text yourself!” You hand your phone to Tom with a smile plastered across your face that you can’t quit. You stare at Tom as he types away on your phone. For the first time, you recognized how truly beautiful he is. His sharp jawline blended down into soft skin and broad shoulders. A curl of his brown hair cascaded down over his eye and his fingers were-

“(Y/N)?” Tom’s smooth voice interrupts your thoughts. “You’re drooling, love.” You blush like mad.

“S-sorry.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever get over seeing how easy you get embarrassed,” Tom says. Before you can say anything, Tom leans in and leaves a barely-there kiss on your lips. “See you soon, Darlin’.” Tom smiles and walks out into the rain without another word. You stand under the awning, stunned by the interaction you had just had.

You hop out into the rain like a little kid during the first storm after a long summer. Though it isn’t as stormy as it was before, the rain still pelts against your skin and seeps into your shoes and socks. The wind pushes you up the sidewalk. You knew you’d have a hefty Uber bill waiting for you for missing your ride, but you couldn’t be bothered; You had a date with Spider-man.

A/N: This is the first “fan fic” type thing I’ve written in, like, 3 years so let me know what you think!! I plan on writing a lot more for this blog so feedback is appreciated :)

[taenys]

have you considered talking to tom and letting him know how you feel regarding him still keeping contact with his ex?

I assume you follow me on twitter and saw my dumb emo tweets last week :/// but yeah, I have actually in the past. Well, kind of. He brought it up before in like August or something last year after he noticed (I’m sure more than once) that I got weirdly quiet and awkward when he’d say something like “I was talking to insert ex’s name here about blah blah blah” and I’d sort of just “uh huh” and shift uncomfortably. She’s his friend though, so for him he’s just sharing an anecdote of a conversation he had with a friend, not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. He’s a smart dude though, and I’m terrible at hiding my emotions anyway so it was fairly obvious I wasn’t totally cool with those little anecdotes so after a couple times of that, he finally brought it up. He asked if it bothered me that he was still friends with her. I went into a sort of panic mode and shut down and gave him a weirdly cold answer because I didn’t know how to articulate the 5000000 words that were running through my mind. I needed time to process how I wanted to answer that because it was much more layered than what he was probably thinking. 

Anyways, I went on here as soon as I got home, my safe space to vent in really long essay format about my feelings LMAO, and wrote this massive thing explaining how I felt and why I felt the way that I did (which if you don’t have time to read THAT essay on top of THIS 2k one, then the tl;dr version is essentially: I strongly dislike her because I feel like she was very toxic and just generally a pretty shitty girlfriend and he sacrificed so much and gave so much to her and that relationship and got very little care and love in return . And that damaged him and soured his entire outlook on love and dating, namely his ability, or maybe his desire, to love someone as profoundly and selflessly as he had in that relationship). 

So after writing that whole thing I thought, “okay I need to communicate this to Tom now, but how? Wait another week until I see him in person? Let him think I’m just a petty brat who doesn’t want him talking to his ex because I’m “jealous” or some dumb shit like that for that whole week????” Absolutely not. So I sent him the link to that huge essay (yeah, I sent him a link to my blog here, so I’ve been exposed!!!!!) And he read it and thanked me for being open and honest. And that was the end of that. It was never brought up again. From then on, I had assumed that meant he would no longer say things like “I was talking to ---- the other day…” or would at least be more considerate about it knowing it made me feel…sad and uncomfortable. But then last Friday a few hours before he was going to pick me up to stay at his place, he brought her up and it felt like a punch to the gut. 

So Animal Crossing has been my thing since it came out recently, I’ve been addicted like a billion other people are, and he’s been watching me play it since the beginning, keeping up with my progress and whatnot. I show him the goings on of my island, he sees me freak out over cute character interactions with my villagers, etc. I literally talk about it all the time with him and send him giddy texts and pictures updating him on my adventures and stuff because he’s my best friend and I want to share that stuff. I even named my island “Higgins” after his cat. He also knows that I love the villager Pietro to death (because I whine and mope about it all the time to him) and am DYING to have him on my island. So much so that I was considering spending up to 60 dollars on an official amiibo card to get him on my island, like a complete nutter.  

However, there are other ways to acquire a specific villager in that game, one of which requires making a “fake” amiibo card with a special chip and an android device with some specific apps. It’s cheap, and seemingly easy, but I hadn’t actually done any research on how to do it yet. I don’t actually feel like I have time to worry about that and it’s not high on my priority list right now. But anyways, the reason I’m sharing all of this is because Tom texted me that Friday saying that his ex was going to make her own fake amiibos and offered to make me one for Pietro. That’s really nice, isn’t it?! Yeah, it is. Except it made me feel really fucking shitty and depressed. Why?! Why though. Why do I have to CARE about shit that doesn’t matter anymore? 

Well, for one just seeing her name typed out tends to activate instant sadness and discomfort for me (I won’t use the word “trigger” but you get what I mean). But then it morphed into “Wait, why is he talking about me with her? Why would she offer that? Did she just casually mention she was making those and he then asked if she would make one for me? Or perhaps during whatever conversations they’ve had about the game, seeing as he doesn’t play it himself, he only had my experiences to share with her and that’s how she knew about what character I wanted. What else does she know about me, my interests, our relationship, etc? Has he ever...complained about me to her? Does she know that I don’t like her? And if I say “no thanks” to her offer (which is what I ultimately did say) will she think I’m being weird and immature? Will Thomas think so too? Does he already? 

These were all questions that began flooding my mind, making me feel worse and worse. Chronic overthinker, I know. I cried, out of frustration with myself for reacting this way. I was being irrational and ridiculous. And I knew this, which is why I chose to let it go. I let myself be sad about it for as long as I needed to be (which was luckily really only like a day and a half). But I let it go. Because it’s not actually a big deal. I was overreacting and overthinking and I knew this so I didn’t bring it up and I hoped to FUCK he wouldn’t either. I let myself be sad about though, because suppressing shit doesn’t help, but I just got through it. I worked through it internally. I felt like I owed it to him to try. And I felt better soon after. And even more so now being able to write about it in detail like this. Very cathartic and good for me to express it openly without judgement in writing. So thank you for allowing me that freedom.

It would honestly make me uncomfortable to know that Thomas is divulging personal snippets of my life, personality, interests, quirks, and our relationship with her just as small talk or whatever. I don’t want her to know me (or more than basic surface level stuff about me. maybe that makes me shitty). The same way I don’t want to know her. I already feel like I know TOO much about her (which is completely my own fault of course lmao). But I know and respect that Thomas has every right to share whatever information about his life he wants with her (and all his other friends, for that matter), and I’m a (significant) part of his life so naturally I’m sure to come up. He was just thinking of me in that moment when he sent me her offer, I’m sure. Thinking how happy it’d make me to have that character FINALLY, but not realizing my complete disdain for who I was receiving it from would ruin it for me completely LMAO. Yeah, I want Pietro but not THAT bad. Maybe that does make me petty and immature. Whatever.

I will never ask Thomas not to be her friend to talk to her. Never. One, because I don’t ever want to be that controlling and manipulative. And two, because I understand what she is to him. She’s basically...his ex-wife lmao. That’s the simplest way I can put it. They’ve been friends for a long time and lived together for five years. He moved to Oregon for HER. Marriage was in discussion near the end. I mean, they probably could have gotten married if certain circumstances had been different (though I doubt either of them would’ve been happy in that marriage). They adopted a cat together. So she’s basically his ex-wife with whom he shares a “child” with (the cat), and he will therefore always have an important connection with her. She’s likely always going to be his friend and part of his life. I accept that and respect that completely. 

But for me, I will always see her as someone who was toxic and damaging to Thomas when they were together, and they were together for a long time. I understand that now they’re just friends so there’s no more toxicity in their relationship, and enough time has passed that he’s likely forgiven her and perhaps she’s even apologized to him for the way she was, but the effects from their relationship will always be there internally for Tom. I’m in a relationship with a Thomas who no longer lets himself get intensely attached to his romantic partners. I believe there is a wall no one will ever penetrate that keeps him safe from ever getting truly heartbroken or hurt again. He will likely never love me with the fervor and selflessness that I love him with because he cannot or does not want to give himself to a person like that anymore (this is all assumption of course, I don’t know the inner workings of his heart as well as he does and maybe I’m wrong). And that’s all because of that relationship. 

He will love and care for me as much as he can, will be firmly loyal and devoted and good and honest and kind. And that’s all I could ever ask for and want. I must emphasize this! I am not saying that Tom isn’t “good enough” or isn’t “giving me enough.” He loves me in his way (I can’t ask him to love me in MY way, that’s not how love works), and that’s all I’ll ever need. I love him unconditionally. But his whole concept of “love” and relationships has never been, and likely never will be, the same again for him. She really was his “one true love.” He’s “I’m not looking for anyone to ‘complete’ me” Thomas now, not “hopeless romantic, giving up everything and moving across the country for someone” Thomas anymore. I’m not saying I want Thomas to do something grand and dramatic to prove his love for me, or that I think he’s broken and needs to be fixed. I love him just as he is and would not change him in any way. He is perfect to me just as he is. 

My point is that he loved all he could love with her, for five plus years, and she drained him until there was hardly anything left. And as a result he (likely) decided he should never love someone that much ever again. And that crushes me completely. And I blame her for that. I’ll always blame her and always resent her for that. THAT’S the reason why it bothers me when he mentions her. She had selfless, devoted, hopeless romantic, emotional, vulnerable Thomas and she...didn’t care. She just wasted all of his love. How anyone could do that, I’ll never know. She never loved him as much as he loved her. He deserved better, and I’ll always be hurt by that. 

And so for all for all of that I…don’t like her. And I don’t want to try to like her. I don’t know if I ever CAN like her. And I hope he never demands that I do get to know her or become her friend or something because she’s really THAT important to him or whatever. God, I really hope that’s not a deal breaker for him or something but I feel like he would’ve mentioned that back then when it was brought up the first time. Maybe someday I’ll care less, I’ll get over it, I’ll forgive her too, but for now it’s still something that I can’t look past. I can live with it, I can accept it, but I don’t enjoy being reminded of it. 

I hate her for hurting the person I love. That’s all it is.

also I AM EXTREMELY SORRY FOR WRITING 2K+ WORDS ON A QUESTION THAT REALLY ONLY NEEDED A YES OR NO ANSWER SDJKLFDJKLDFJLKDFJKL; I just REALLY had to get this out of my system, and also need it for future reference in case it DOES come up again in the near future I want a sort of guide on how to express myself because I’ll likely be too emotional to articulate it verbally properly so it would be nice to have like an outline of things to touch on...if that makes sense. 

[the-dreamer-with-the-green--blog]

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