#c-casu
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#the future is far#dragonthunders01#praya#zenwyrmmess#crowns#charseraph#uniima#yellosnac#land dolphins#alphynix#planet opi#c-casu#vivere 44#styllwaters#mystery flesh pit#speculative evolution#spec evo#if I missed any projects let me know#I can always make a poll 3#shout out to the spec creators of tumblr
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paradigm shift
zoro x afab!reader c/w: jealous zoro, he raises his voice/yells at reader, possessive behavior, fwb to lovers, semi-public sex, piv sex a/n: inspired by a conversation @sunfloworcs and i had. meant to post this last night but i forgor! anyway here's wonderwall
Zoro watches you smile at the man attempting to court you at the bar. He watches as you laugh at something he says before replying in a manner that's a little too enthusiastic for the brooding swordsman in the corner.
He grits his teeth and tightens the grip on his drink, frustrated at the sight across the tavern.
The way your cheeks flush with mild inebriation makes Zoro clench the hand on his knee into a fist. His leg doesn't seem to stop bouncing as he glares in your direction, the tick going unnoticed due to his annoyance at the patron you're speaking with and himself for even caring.
You're not exclusive. The length of your shared relationship had been long decided as friends who just fuck on the side for a little stress relief, so why the hell does he care that some nobody is trying to coax you into their bed?
He takes a deep breath, exhaling through his mouth in what ultimately proves to be a feeble attempt at calming himself. It almost works, but as he brings the mug of ale to his lips he notices you lean in a little closer to the man, that undeniable look of desire flickering in your heavy-lidded expression that Zoro knows all too well.
Before he can even think to stop himself, Zoro stands from his seat and makes his way toward you, heavy boot steps trudging against the wooden floor of the tavern.
You don't notice his approach, far too lost in the music and conversation to really pay attention. It's only when his large hand envelops the small of your back that you pay him any mind.
"Yeah, if you wanna get out of here maybe we could fin-" the hopeful patron begins, the remainder of the sentence lost to time as Zoro rudely interrupts.
"We're leavin'," the pirate states bluntly, pulling you away from the man without hesitation.
"But-" You call out, a hand reaching in hopeless desperation toward the bar where your soon-to-be abandoned drink sits. "The others?"
"Fuck 'em," Zoro snaps, not looking in your direction as he leads you through the door and out into the humidity of the island. "They'll catch up."
"What's wrong with you?" Your voice wavers with uncertainty as you try and fail to wriggle from his tight grip upon your forearm. "Why're you so pissed at me?"
"I'm not pissed at ya!" Zoro shouts back defensively, stopping short to face you. "But I don't want some random asswipe tryin' to sweet talk my shipmate!"
You nearly trip over yourself when he suddenly comes to a halt in the middle of the street, the once lively town now having fallen into a slumber of its own. "So you just get up and leave?" You reply, managing to keep your balance before staring up at him angrily, a slight tilt to your head in mild confusion. "And what do you care if someone wants to 'sweet talk' me?"
"Because I care about ya!" Zoro barks, feeling his heart race in his chest. "I don't want anyone else touchin' what's mine!"
Your eyes widen, paralyzed in place as the words hang in the air somewhat awkwardly. Zoro's expression is still one of anger, brows furrowed and mouth twisted into a harsh frown. "I-" you swallow, shaking your head in an attempt to be rid of the butterflies threatening to form in your belly. "What's yours?" You finally echo, tone wavering between frustration and disbelief.
"You!" Zoro yells, grabbing you by the shoulders and forcing you to look directly into his eyes. "Me and you, we've got somethin' special goin' on! We don't need anyone complicatin' things!"
You part your lips as if wanting to speak before averting his gaze with an unreadable expression. Your brows are raised and your hands tremble at your sides. "I thought we decided to just keep it casu-" Zoro cuts you off with a firm grip to your chin, forcing your gaze upon him once more.
"That doesn't matter!" He huffs, the hand on your shoulder twitching slightly as he fights off the urge to move it to the back of your neck. "Fuck," Zoro groans, the low timbre of his voice sending a shiver down your spine. He looks around quickly, and before you can say anything you feel him start to pull you along by the arm again and down a stray alleyway.
You hurry along behind him as best you can, accepting your fate within his iron grip. He stops and you hear him sigh heavily, his shoulders tensing in irritation. "Zoro...?"
"Shut up." He commands harshly as he releases your aching wrist, turning to face you with a fierce scowl etched into his features.
You let out a sound akin to a squeak, cheeks flushing in embarrassment as if you had done something wrong. Suddenly you feel vulnerable. Small. Your eyes dare not leave his, unsure and anxious emotions swelling in your mind. You feel your mouth go dry.
"I can't keep pretendin' that this is just a casual thing between us," Zoro declares, taking a step closer to you. "I know what we agreed on, but I can't help it. I want more."
You heart feels like it's about to beat out of your chest. "Zoro-" you whisper, but the swordsman holds up a hand to stop you, not done speaking just yet. If he's going to do this, to expose how he feels, he needs you to shut up and listen.
"I don't want to share ya," He continues, his voice and words blunt. "I already told ya, I don't want anyone else touchin' what's mine." He leans in closer, his warm breath brushing against your earlobe.
Your back clashes with one of the outer walls of the two shops you're tucked in between. Zoro's hand finally finds the nape of your neck, leaning in even further until his lips ghost over yours. "Truth is," he murmurs, thumb caressing your soft skin. "I'm crazy about ya."
And at once, Zoro's lips crash onto your own, engulfing you in an open-mouthed, somewhat messy kiss. Your arms find purchase around his shoulders, eagerly reciprocating the gesture without a second thought. As your tongues dance together, Zoro's hand reaches down to cup your ass, pulling your body flush against his.
A surprised gasp is muffled between a mess of lips and tongue and teeth, the hands on his broad shoulders tightening their grasp at the newfound contact. With a low groan, Zoro breaks away from the kiss, panting heavily. "Now let's get one thing straight," he growls, running his fingers through your hair. "Ya belong to me."
You nod, a huff of what sounds like a breathless whimper of an 'Mhm!' falling from your parted, wet lips.
Grinning triumphantly, Zoro pulls you into another deep, passionate kiss. This time there's no hesitation, no holding back - it's pure desire and hunger and everything else that comes with wanting someone more than anything else in the world. And while your tongues continue to duel and your bodies pressed firmly together, Zoro's hand moves to cup your cheek before trailing down your neck to rest upon the exposed skin of your collarbone. He bites lightly at your jawline, his mouth leaving yours to taste your flesh and leaving a trail of fire wherever he goes.
When he reaches the hem of your shirt, his large, warm hand slides beneath the fabric and meets the soft skin of your torso. A soft moan escapes your throat at the intimate touch, and though he's heard your symphony many times, this note is different. It sends an unfamiliar, but not unwanted jolt to his heart. As if something tugs at his very soul.
Zoro stops in his tracks, thumb just brushing the underside of your breast. His mouth leaves your skin, and you mourn the loss of his touch until he raises his head to look upon the whole of you once more. He scans your face as if committing to memory, and in what seems like an instant, he locks you into another kiss that takes your breath away.
It's tender and careful, each touch working as wordless confessions.
It's almost romantic.
His arms wrap around your middle, lifting you and pressing you flat against the wall. His lips never leave yours either, it's as if you're quite literally glued to one another. When he finally pulls away, he's breathless, and there's a glimmer in his eye that wasn't there before. "You're mine," he repeats, smirking almost wickedly. "And I'm not lettin' go."
Zoro's hand resumes its tour of your body, sliding back under your shirt and grazing over your breast. Your legs wrap around him and he rolls his hips into you, watching as you writhe for him. "You're always on my mind," he admits, his voice heavy and rough. "Even when we're apart."
He descends down your neck, trailing kisses and nibbles and licks to your tender skin. "I can barely keep my hands off ya," Zoro murmurs into you. "If I had my way you'd be in my bed every single night."
"But," Zoro says firmly, breaking away from your neck to look into your eyes. "I won't settle for less than all of ya. I want your heart too."
You exhale as if you'd been holding your breath in for days. You'd be denying yourself truth if you say that you aren't interested - that you're content with just being crewmates once again. But you're not content with it; for at some point in the circumstance of your relationship, what had started as a quick means to an end had indeed grown into something more raw and real.
Something more than just infatuation, more than just lust.
"You have it," you whisper, a flood of warmth bathing your heart. "Zoro, you've had it for a while." The confession is soft, and your tone is a little rasp and hoarse from the intensity of the moment.
Zoro smiles, the gesture reaching all the way to his eyes. He leans down to capture your lips again in a yearning kiss, and as your lips lock together, his hand moves lower still, sliding up your thigh and beneath your skirt. He teasingly skims along the edge of your panties before dipping beneath the fabric. A breathy gasp falls from your lips, the sound thankfully swallowed by Zoro's hungry kiss.
He groans, feeling your wetness against his fingers. "Damn, ya drive me crazy, y'know that?" he mutters against your lips. You whine as he touches you, eyes squeezing shut in pleasure and clutching him ever closer to you. "But I love it," he adds, pulling away from the kiss to gaze down at you with a smirk. "Love how much ya need me."
"Always need you," you reply, lips swollen and glossed over with saliva. "All of you."
With a wicked grin, Zoro pulls back slightly, giving you a better view of his erection straining against his pants. He pulls his hand out from beneath your skirt just long enough to free his aching length from its confines before wrapping it around himself, stroking his cock lazily while watching your face contort in anticipation.
He aligns himself with you, carefully sliding your panties to the side. With a hiss, he pushes himself into you. Zoro's slower than usual, but still just as needy and desperate as ever. He buries himself to the hilt within your warm, plush walls, filling you completely until there's no room left for doubt or denial.
You cry out in surprise and ecstasy, back arching off the wall as Zoro begins to fuck you relentlessly. He holds nothing back, diving into you with all his strength as if trying to claim every inch of your being. His free hand digs into your hipbone, keeping you anchored to him while he pounds into you mercilessly. "Nobody else can have ya," he growls into your ear. "Nobody else can fuck ya like this either, isn't that right, princess?"
You nod wordlessly, unable to find the breath needed for anything more than short gasps of air. Your whole body quivers with each thrust, desperate to take everything he has to offer. Zoro seems determined to make sure you remember exactly what it feels like to be taken by him - and to show everyone within earshot just how much he owns you.
The sound of footsteps echo through the alleyway behind you, causing you both to stiffen momentarily before relaxing again. Clearly, whoever it was didn’t stick around to see what was going on. Zoro doesn’t let go of you though, continuing to fuck you with unrelenting force even as you both know they could come back at any moment.
And you're lost in him once again, completely bent and shaped to his will. Breathless and broken attempts at speech mix in between gasps and moans and sighs of pleasure. He moans softly into your ear, feeling your submission wrapping around him like a warm embrace. It fuels his desire even further, pushing him to go harder and faster until there's no thought left beyond the primal need to fuck you senseless.
It seems like his pace won't ever let up, soon losing any cadence to his motions as his eye closes tightly. A wild light burns within him as he loses himself completely in the act of taking you. The sounds of the village fade away, replaced by only the rhythmic slapping of flesh against flesh and the ragged breath shared between you both.
Your inner walls flutter around him wildly, moans befalling into frantic whimpers that tell him just how close you are to cumming around his cock. You feel yourself reaching the brink, and without warning, Zoro suddenly pulls out of you.
For a brief moment, he leaves you empty and aching - before shoving himself back inside you with a ferocity that makes you cry out in shock. His movements become frantic, almost violent as he tries to bring you over the edge with him.
As your orgasm washes over you, Zoro lets out a near-animalistic growl deep in his throat. His hips piston forward relentlessly, driving himself deeper and deeper into you with each pulse of euphoria. You scream his name, the blissful sensations coursing through your body as waves of pleasure crash over you again and again.
Zoro's moans into your ear grow more erratic, feeling his own peak building rapidly. With one final surge of power, he drives deep into you one last time before releasing himself fully inside and filling you to the brim with his spend. The sensation sends shockwaves through you, leaving you a shuddering and panting mess around him.
Zoro holds you tightly as your head lolls into his shoulder, body twitching slightly as you recover from his harsh fucking. He pulls out from you slowly, giving you a moment to catch your breath before withdrawing completely. Once he does, he helps you straighten up and adjust your clothes before leading you out of the alleyway.
Despite the roughness of your encounter, there's an underlying sense of tenderness in his movements - a reminder that he truly does care for you deeply. And as you walk toward the port where the Sunny is anchored, neither of you speak; instead, you revel in the afterglow of what just conspired between the two of you. There's something incredibly intimate about it now, knowing that you both feel the same way for one another, and it leaves you feeling closer than ever before.
"Zoro," Your voice catches him off guard, the swordsman seemingly lost in thought.
"Hm?" He replies, looking down at you with a raised brow.
You entwine your fingers with his, holding his much larger hand tightly within your own as you point in the opposite direction.
"The ship is that way."
#one piece x reader#one piece x y/n#roronoa zoro x reader#roronoa zoro x y/n#one piece x reader smut#zoro x reader smut#roronoa zoro x you#zoro roronoa x y/n#opla zoro x reader#zoro smut#opla zoro
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News from Birmingham, 2: 'we're out of battery soon'
ACHTUNG, BABY: these pics do NOT belong to me. Please do NOT steal them, Mordorians, as you usually do. I don't want to see them chez Marple, BIF or Purv, I do not want them on X and I certainly do NOT want them on Brazilian Instagram accounts who also charge people, or ANY OTHER Instagram account, for that matter. I will come for you with feather and brimstone if you do. Fuck ye and yer clan if you show no respect - this is a legit casus belli situation.
Heroically reporting from the Q&A panel, our girls are running out of battery juice in their phones, because -as loyal C mainly - they took a bajillion pics. I am selecting them as I write.
First thing, C specifically asked the minder (whom many people I have talked to, today, described as a 'nasty pox of a man'/'un asco de hombre') to let the fans sit next to her and ask their questions as they feel, no tedious standing in line needed. C, always the politician of Those Two, LOL:

Before anything else, I was entrusted with a FULL audio recording of the Birmingham panel. As per copyright regulations and attendance contract I am NOT allowed to post it and I do not want to harm my two wonderful friends in ANY way, shape or form. That being said, I will take my time, tonight (and lots of Nescafe Brasero Strong) to listen to it and give you all the juicy parts, in transcription. Short transcribed bits, we can do. Thank you for your understanding,
And boy, do we have juicy parts, babes. For now, I will just share the best pics and the on the spot reactions.
First question was 'how do you feel as a real mom?' Her solution was to simply say ' Sophie, where are you?' I will check with the audio and repost, but it simply goes to say: a) she won't address anything Blonde Bambino related and b) she/they are still very close to Skeleton, whom they seem to have adopted. Sort of. Sophie knows many secrets. Trust.


✔️Will she stay/remain in Scotland after OL is over? 'Well, my husband is Scottish and so are his parents'. Lip service to the narrative all the way.


✔️A fan asked something she did not understand/catch well, while Steve the 'Asco de Hombre' minder was fumbling around with the mic, so she informally went 'whaat?' So Steve dutifully barked, in a LOUD voice 'IT'S ABOUT TONY, YOUR REAL HUSBAND' (🙄 - I would fire that dick on the spot, he simply makes her look controlled and a fool). I was also told to listen carefully to the audio, for context and I shall give you my honest sentiment, as always. Note to self: to be found around the 25' mark.


✔️Turns out the fan asked if she and Tracula share the same musical tastes. She answers du tac au tac/on the spot, 'who, me and Sam?' (CAITRIONA!). And this is when Steve 'Nasty Pox of a Man' interjected, 'NO, TONY, YOUR REAL HUSBAND'. Like father, like daughter: remember that Tydavnet interview for the public Irish radio, when she was promoting Belfast? Well, there we go ('And Tony!/ 'And Tony' - zero enthusiasm, Mr. Balfe, bless your big 💖in Heaven).
I will come back with more. Our friends' batteries died, but they still managed to share with me the entire audio panel.
And I swear to God - if I ever see one of your sock accounts (@homechef, anyone?) come to steal from here and then tell the world it was the Team or who the hell else who found it while you were having your tonsils polished/an umpteeenth root canal mended/dinner with Brad Pitt's Sunset Boulevard lookalike/whatever, you shall be reported.
And yes, I have more pics. In fact, I have about 35 of them, in all and for all.
I LOVE MY FRIENDS AND THEY LOVE ME. TAKE THAT, HATERS.
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Ugh, I love love soft baby daddy sukuna, and I know I would be so conflicted on wanting him back, casue I’m pretty sure you may have alluded to him cheating? I think, you said he was making out with someone while drunk but I’m not sure if it was during when they were together ahh
thank you, nonnie!! I love this man too :c he is sadly occupying my thoughts in every sense of the way. and yes, I did allude to cheating 🥺 so, in my head - you and sukuna get into a pretty serious argument and instead of dealing with it, he just goes out and gets so drunk. he doesn't even remember the girl, or what she looked - just knows that he woke up with lipstick stains all over his face and you caught him him red handed with the evidence when you tried to show up the next morning to talk to him.
it was absolutely heartbreaking. it even broke him.
you were the last person in this world he wanted to hurt.
but the heartbreak is what held sukuna back from changing, especially after you went radio silent on him for two months. when you reached out he was elated and actually thought he might be able to win a second chance.
except - you told him you were pregnant, and that you didn't have any expectations for him to be involved. you were cold and stern, and it was a massive slap to his face.
not only did he hurt you in the worst way possible, but the fact that this was the reputation he left behind?
he knows what it was like to have shitty parents, and he sure as hell wasn't going to be a shitty parent either. when he told you he wanted to be involved, you just kind of shrugged him off. but he wasn't going to let you think that this is all he's worth.
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Blitzbee kid #3 Riosa
She is a Triple-Changer with a Seeker and Grounder alt-modes. She inherited the honeycomb patter, 5 optics & four limbs from Bee. The red coloring is a strange genetic ??? similar to Cliffjumpers' which she finds funny. She's slightly shorter than Blitzwing and her brothers but it's not the most obvious thing in the world. As for her fighting style, she has an extremely aggressive defense. She's got thick stingers that too good at puncturing most bots with little difficulty. She will bite and tear into someone with her clawed servos. Her venom can casue you to hallucinate and override your systems causing you to slowly shut down, it will be slow and painful, and she will laugh at you dying. Her unpredictably on the battlefield makes her a threat to both sides. She's switches between alt-modes to fuck with people and catch them off guard.
She's the youngest child & only daughter and it fuckin' sucks at times. You could arguably say her life was over before she truly lived it. At least in the early years. By the time she emerged the Autobots were already at the base. Growing up she could tell something was off with her family, everyone told her not to worry about it. The only one who seemed to be remotely honest was Jazz & Ratchet but even then, it always ended the same "Only your sire can tell you that." Ratchet didn't coddle her and Jazz helped her deal with life through music. This is why they are her favorites.
As a child the fear for what she was didn't really set in until she was 5 and her T-cog fully formed. She transformed for the first time and realized she had two alt-modes instead of one, she thought this made her just like daddy and was overjoyed by this. The family had a very mixed bag in terms of reactions. Bee & Blitz knew this was a possibility, but had foolishly, desperately even, hoped their daughter would be spared. Later that night she was practicing using her wheels on her legs in the hallway and heard crying, her sire crying. She's never heard him cry before and she didn't like it, naturally she rushed in without thinking but crashed right into her parents. This is met with her being scooped up in Blitzs' arms and him just saying he's sorry over and over again whilst crying his optics out. She doesn't understand why but Blitz didn't feel like talking, he just held her.
As a teen the weight what she truly is has finally began to take its toll and she's began to ask questions. Why does she have to see Ratchet more than her brothers? Why is it such a big deal that she can't linger outside for too long? Even if she flies there are rules. Why is it such a big deal that she's a Triple-Changer? Blitzwing hovers over her like a shadow and refuses to actually answer any of her questions. As that would mean talking about what happened to him ages ago and that trauma has Blitz in a vice. Bee clashes heads with Blitz and the whole family on this, telling him to get his head outta his ass and talk to her. That keeping her in a cage that she will eventually outgrow. She finds an aunt in Arcee and a grandmother in Elita and looks up to them and goes to them for advice regarding 'Femme Things' b/c Rio didn't know how to deal with that especially as she got older and her frame changed.
They grew distant and Riosa has opted to sneaking out at night for a few hours of freedom. She finds the most fun in competing in illegal races across the city. It's through these races she meets Wildbreak; the son of Knockout & Breakdown and a Decepticon Stunticon. They start meeting up in secret to race but get caught by Slipstream; StarScream and Skyefires' daughter. Rio would keep Slip updated on how her sire was doing as Slip herself couldn't see him as much as she liked. This paved the way for a really strange friend trio.
As an adult she travels for work, having taken unofficial lessons in medical practice under Ratchet thanks to having spent her childhood under his care. She avoids Cybertron like the plague and only visits family, friends, and for work. As far as the family knows, she's just a traveling medic who makes a "unique" brand of High-Grade Energon as a side hustle. While this is technically true, there is an illegal, immoral and unethical side to her work. The high-grade has properties that give the consumer drug-like hallucinations, you are guaranteed a good as time. But if you drink too much, it will be your last time. She slapped a warning label on her products, but accidents tend to happen regardless. She's called to pick up the "mess" and she leaves. She harvests the bots' organs to sell either through a market or for patients, nobody asks questions. She keeps tabs on all her clients, her biggest one being Shockwave himself.
She hates Cybertron and only tolerates the planet because majority of her family lives there and cares about it. When it comes to the Autobots, they despise her b/c she's Blitzwings daughter and deemed a threat that needs to be dealt with. The Decepticons view her as a lowly hybrid and think it's a waste that she's not on their side. Many despise her, but they also recognize that she could be used a potential weapon for their respective cause Black Arachnia being one of them. Both sides have tried to sway her and are usually met with their parts getting shipped in a box.
Her relationship with her family is pretty good all things considered but for her and Blitzwing there is a bit of tension from the past. He did eventually talk to her about the whole Triple-Changer thing. It ended with a new understanding, but it gave birth to a new hatred for the Femme responsible and the Mech who gave the order.
Her love-life is a fucking mess and a half. With her reputation, who her creators and brothers are doesn't really help. She can tell when someone just wants her for their own gain, and she's responded by eating them. It's an unexpected call from Shockwave that sends her on a twisted path towards someone who actually cares about her for her. She's torn, not wanting to ruin this but also wanting to give into this deep-rooted desire and impulses. But these are dark and there's no way no sane bot would put up with that. Right?
#my art#fanart#digital art#transformers#tf riosa#blitzbee kid#humanformers#tf oc#transformers oc#blitzbee#transformers au#unicrons little soldier#she is genuinely fucked up at times and it stress everyone out#she doesnt cope well alot but would rather die than burden her family with her bullshit#she took 2 things she hates about herself and made it into a profit
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A rapid knock echoed through the halls of the doctors house. Ulysses was out getting more stuff for potions which left the little olm alone in the safety of their dads home.
The knocking had yet to cease becoming more worrisome as time past.
- @casus-luck
[Aax jumps up, inhaling sharply as they are woken up quickly. They cough.]
"C-Coming-" [He gets up and stumbles to the door, opening it.]
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One Piece Characters as Discord Shenanagins

Characters: Variouse One Piece characters
A/N: Links to the discord at the bottom, come join and chat
C/W: NSFW, talk about racism and homaphobia, Swearing, death, violence, general shit post,

Tumblr quote of the day:
"Let me shove my fist up your ass and call it a day" - Honeybezz local server whore

Luffy: Just call me Lord Of Queefs
Law: No.
Sanji: *Gasps* "Oh my god munchkins I can't belive god would do this to our women" *clecnes fist till knucles turn white while shaking in anger* "I - I- J- just" *tears pouring down face* I'll make the pain go away *dry heaving* "casue I'm experinced in pain since everyone leaves me.." *has truma flashbacks* "I just wan't to let youknow that I understand the pain of childbirth since i'be been kicked in the nutz" *deep breath* "ok im gonna go to the gym now and yell racial slurs at gay people" *gallops off into the sunset*
Robin: You guys can't let me leave for two seconds
Luffy: Uhhh
Chopper: Mummy I drank all the bleach on the counter :(
luffy: nwo sowwy mummy 💕🥺🤞
Sabo: when I find you i'm WWE style slamming you into the ground
Ace: It's so prepy in here
Buggy: I'm force feeding you dildos till you stop breath..
Shanks: My prefered way to go, either this or radiation poising from eating mercury
Crocodile: Actually I'm gonna fill you with sand untill all your holes are closed
Buggy: Then can we put me in an oven so it to turns into glass, then I can be a human vase.
Buggy: OOO that rhymes just called me Kanye West
Crocodile: I despise you with every fibere, every atom, every MOLECULE of my being.
Buggy: *Giggles*
Crocodile: 'SHUTTAP"
Zoro: Only if Sanji was still here with us fligh high my little Akuma
Sanji: Bye bye little butterfly I say, slicing open Zoro's throat 🥺🥺
Zoro: I dont wipe my ass, I like to let it crust so I can peel it like dried paint
Nami: ZORO THIS IS WHY YOU HAVE A UTI
Kid: Thigh ass or boobs
Law: Liver
Kid: I'm gonna feed you to the sharks
Robin: That dick that makes you go crazy
Nami: The dick that smiles back
Robin: If I had a dick I'd peg yall
Nami: PEG ME ANYWAY

Join server
at any point if the link says expired check my most recent post to see if theirs a newer one or DM me
#zorosleftmantit#one piece#one piece x reader#one piece headcanons#one piece funny#headcanon#one piece x you#crack post#monkey d luffy#god usopp#luffy x reader#law x reader#zoro x reader#nami x reader#robin x reader#kidd x reader#ace x reader#sabo x reader#shitpost#x reader#buggy x reader#one piece shitpost#one piece crack#killer x reader#shanks x reader#nico robin#sanji x reader#crocodile x reader#kid x reader#one piece smut
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So my friend who is a C. MURPHY fan is so disappointed that despite being Irish he never said anything about Palestine and she said something about andrew that I think you need to hear , she said:
"We can't be sure but imo celebs aren't scared on movie deals as they are afraid on brand deals. All the brands that are supporting israel have not allowed any of their ambassadors to say anything while they (the brands)voiced their support to Israel. Like omega said " we have one alley in the middle east and its Israel". Didn't you all feel he would become an ambassador for omega, that didn't happen and he have not wore an omega watch since December. In fact he was wearing jaeger-lecoultre ( who never said anything about the conflict and isn't on the boycott list) and chopard who literally hired bella H*did as their ambassador. He still working but there is no big brand deals under his belt and he doesn't seem to care. While c*lian became ambassador to a brand that's owner literally donated money to Israel. This is so disappointing. "
Now I'm not saying this makes andrew a hero but there is a logic to what she is saying.
To clarify she doesn't mean that andrew isn't getting deals casue of Palestine... she means he never really cared bout about getting deals so he spoke up unlike others.
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Favorite villain and what you wish we could have seen more of - DT ask
(I am super aware this has been nearly a year and I am so sorry for putting you on hold for so long you don't have to see this but if you do I hope you will like it thank you and sorry ahhhh)
(1) First: Favourite villain...Jim Starling Hum...this is immediately a hard one...
Okay yes...If Mister Starling counts as a "villain", he is my favourite (at least, the first favourite that comes to mind when I see this question). For purely subjective reasons. not my fault that he is my type of duck man a huh huh huh
("The Duck Knight Returns!" literally gave me 2 of my favourite characters in DT17 in 1 episode who then never appear again. Sadge)
But if Jim doesn't count and I turn off my extremely biased mind, I would say Lunaris.
Solely because of his moonvasion plan. As complex as DT17 writing could possibly be (it is still a children's comedy show, after all), the plan is actually quite clever. He really uses Della as much as he can:
(a) Steal the rocket blueprint because I can't for my life build one myself
(b) Get as much information about the Duck Family and their allies, who will be one of (if not) the biggest adversaries I will encounter on Earth
(c) Lastly, fake a betrayal as the casus belli
Perfect.
Honestly, Lunaris only lost because of a lack of resources/knowledge that he can't possibly obtain/predict:
There is literally only 2 military personnel on Moon, while the rest are all civilians (who make up a barely functional army)
One of said military personnel immediately deflected, and that personnel ultimately helps dismantle the plan
He doesn't have all the information about all people on Earth (e.g. Flintheart, Fethry, Gladstone), because he is not based on Earth in the first place (unlike, for example, Bradford)
Our protagonists literally have the power of god and anime on their side (if Zeus wasn't being cringy and childish, the moonvasion would have ended as soon as it had started)
Now that I have finished the entire series, I actually like the resolution to Moonvasion more than that to The Last Adventure. Bradford has everything that Lunaris lacks: He has a functional task force (okay still one person deflected but she is taken care of soon enough). He has all the information about everything he needs. He somehow can disable and overpower the protagonists' power of god and anime.
Bradford is literally winning until he is somehow not anymore.
FOWL is literally OP until it is somehow not anymore.
The Last Adventure is definitely epic, even more so than the Moonvasion arc. It has a wonderful buildup with interconnected stories (one thing I absolutely love about Season 3 is how the Kit Cloudkicker episode - which seemingly is just a cameo episode - is still tied to the main conflict of Season 3). Everything looks amazing. But as an action anime fan the solution to the conflict is one thing I feel somewhat confused about.
For one, I have to agree with Mister Buzzard: "Family is the greatest adventure of all" is not a reasonable rebuttal.
(For any JoJo fans reading this, I think this is the DT17 equivalent of "So it's the same type of Stand as Star Platinum.")
(And speaking of JoJo, Lunaris literally got Kars-ed at the end lmao)
Sorry @shychick-52 if you have no idea what I am talking about, I will stop now.
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(2) More I wish we could have seen more of...JIM STARLING I wonder...
Okay, I am honestly curious about what they had in store for Negaduck. I think I have seen the behind-the-scene episode idea somewhere (i.e. The ultimately scrapped idea). At the very least, "Let's Get Dangerous!" could have featured my man, but for what it ended up to be now, I am not complaining either.
Other than that, I want to see more interactions between the Duck Cousins, actually (i.e. Donald, Della, Gladstone, Fethry). With DT17 introducing Fethry (for which I will be forever grateful), the quartet (?) being together is something I would like to see more of. Especially with how extensive HDL and Webby has been interacting since literally the first episode of the show, I feel like it would be awesome seeing a grown-up version of this group in the Duck Cousins.
(Perhaps an episode of the 2 groups hanging out together? Moonvasion is the closest there is to something like this)
There are some interactions between the 4 of them, noticeably the Moonvasion mentioned above, and The Last Adventure. But ultimately there could have been more potential, which might have been limited by Gladstone's and Fethry's little screentime (as much as they are part of the Duck Family, both of them are ultimately guest characters).
That being said, this is purely my subjective feeling. If truly implemented into the show, the Duck Cousins thing would be a bonus instead of a missing piece or missed opportunity (e.g. No Della - Gyro interaction whatsoever, despite the rocket-building manual and Oxychew. And I say this not as a shipper). So, just my personal opinion.
#Once again really sorry for the wait#And thank you for the ask#I really appreciate it#You may see my activity this year is super wonky and inconsistent as well#I know I have said this a thousand times#But I am slowly getting more active again#Really can't make any promises at this point but I will keep on trying#Hope this answer finds you well (better than I am at least)#infodump
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╰┈➤ ❝ [Harmony-Archibald "Archie" Tissera] ❞
༄༄ They/Them ༄༄ 23 ༄༄ Aquarius ༄༄
Music & Composition Student
Entertainer of The Mirror
"Life is always better with a little music!~"
𝄔𝄅𝄢𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄂
Harmony-Archibald Tissera, commonly referred to as Harmony or Archie, is a child prodigy virtuoso, composer, and music history student at Casus College of International Arts. They host a music club called The Speakeasy with their band, The Speakeasy Experience.
╰┈➤[≈] Description
What is Archie Tissera's physical appearance?
Archie is 5 feet 11 inches, or 180.34 centimeters. Their skin is a deep brown with a warm undertone. Their hair is coily and often done up in protective hair styles, but when natural has a curl pattern of 4a. They have a heavy and curvy build, their assets prominent. They have a dry skin type, accentuated by the climate of Casus Vallis. They have stretch marks on the lower portion of their belly, the outside of their thighs, under their arms, and on their chest. Prior to entering the Mirror World, their original hair colour was a very dark brown, almost black. Their eyes were a very dark brown. After entering the Mirror World, a clump of hair on the left of their forehead took on a vibrant blue tint. The pupils of their eyes became light brown quavers (♪). referencing their longtime love and dedication to music.
What is Archie Tissera's background and history?
Archie was born in Port of Spain, Trinidad in an affluent home and position. Being born to a mother who was a musician, both them and their twin were made to learn instruments early on in life. The twins were often brought out as a duo string act, attracting audiences throughout Trinidad - not only for their skill, but the novelty of their performance - Archie on the double bass, Symph on the viola. While Archie poured everything into perfecting the craft (under instruction from their mother), their sibling comparatively did not, often doing only what was necessary to make their mother happy. After entering high school, the siblings relationship was strained, often still seen as 'the twin musicians' and nothing else. While Archie enjoyed the attention for their music, Symph enjoyed the attention for their popularity, putting more focus on other instruments simply as a means of impressing people. It didn't sit right with Archie, and eventually they split apart completely, their duo becoming two solo acts. When Symph moved out of Casus with their friend to join a band, Archie was furious, wanting to be there with them but not wanting the fame to come along with it, holding a lot of secret resentment. Now Symph and their partner, Dmitri, are part of a band called B&C, for Mr. Banana and Mr. Corn, a musician-magician combo act. They became world-famous, with the public adoring their campy style and popular music. Since they blew up, the only music Archie resents is B&C.
Who is Archie Tissera related to? Who is their family?
Archie lives with their mother, Pethmi Tissera, and father, Lawrence Tissera. Both their mother and father work for Casus College of International Arts, their mother as a music theory professor and private violin tutor, their father as a carpentry and general construction professor. Before their careers at the college, Pethmi was an acclaimed violinist and ravanahatha expert, traveling around the world with her orchestra until she landed in Trinidad and Tobago, meeting a quiet and humble carpenter on the beach - who happened to be Lawrence. Pethmi never went back home to Sri Lanka, choosing to stay in Trinidad to be with her love. They also have a twin sibling, Symphony-Archibald Tissera, commonly referred to as Symph, who lives outside of Casus to pursue their dreams as a pop star and magician.
What sort of activities does Archie Tissera like?
Above all else, Archie loves music. Playing music. Listening to music. Dancing to music. They specialize in the double bass and electric bass, but play a huge surplus of modern instruments - even if they haven't tried an instrument, they could easily pick it up! Their entire world revolves around everything that has to with music. As the host of the college music club, The Speakeasy, they have not only dedicated their education, but their free evenings to performing for the public. When their focus isn't on music, Archie is shopping for excellent fashion finds they can refurbish or craft to something even better, or getting their nails done in gorgeous bright colours and art.
What kind of traits, ticks, or behaviours does Archie Tissera exhibit?
Archie is an excitable, joyous, and entertaining individual who loves being the centre of attention. When they aren't the centre of attention, they are highlighting other musicians or performers to make sure everyone gets a turn in the spotlight. Aside from that, they tend to get distracted easily on little details, derailing a conversation or jumping from one activity to the next in a manner of minutes. Because of this, it is hard for them to complete tasks or creations (other than composing music) and there are many unfinished projects lying around their home. Archie also has several vocal stims they present outwardly, including but not limited to whistling, humming, singing, and clicking their tongue. Weirdly enough, they don't like to sing in front of an audience unless necessary, because they consider singing to be their best stim and act of comfort.
What does Archie Tissera want? What prevents them from achieving that goal?
Archie wants to spread the beauty of music all throughout Casus, the country, and the world. They want to teach youth how sound can make people feel good and do good, but aren't necessary looking for the fame that comes along with it. Unlike their sibling, Archie wants to show music for the enjoyment, not the spotlight (even if they like attention a little bit!)
How does Archie Tissera interact with their surroundings?
Archie sometimes forgets to use their indoor voice, laughing loudly and talking about things at inappropriate times. This can lead to people being upset and considering them irresponsible. They try to combat this by being a great host at The Speakeasy, but it doesn't always translate well. Raised in luxury, Archie is sometimes ignorant of people's upbringings, thinking everyone grew up with a pool, or went on vacations, but they are always willing to learn and are constantly trying to get better. Archie tends to leave unfinished projects around places, so if you're lucky enough to visit their opulent home, their bedroom is a mess of activities, crafts, and used plates. They're a little messy, but try to keep up with it.
What do outsiders think of Archie Tissera? How do they treat them?
Those who know Archie know they are a beacon of entertainment and joy. The Speakeasy is often attended by not only college students, but people throughout Casus and just past town limits. Their fans are extremely supportive and spread the word as much as they can. They are always a welcoming person, offering to be their guide or support immediately upon meeting a stranger. At times this can be off putting for outsiders, but most students appreciate the support. Strangers might be surprised by their immediate joy and excitement at first, but most like their first impression. Some others think they are inappropriate and don't know how to take things seriously.
What do Archie Tissera's friends think of them? How do they treat them?
Yhat: "When I first met them, I thought they were just another pretty face. Then I really got to know them and see the excitement they spread. Wow, they have got some real skill in music and in battle! I have never met a person who can play so many instruments and use them to their biggest potential while in a fight, it's pretty fucking awesome. Plus, they're a partier just like me - usually I hate the guy who brings the guitar to parties, but they are the exception."
Gwen: "Such a warm soul, always making people laugh, sharing candies with their friends, giving amazing music recommendations for whatever genre you like - just amazing on all grounds. I was very new to Casus when we first met, and they invited me to one of their shows. It was a great introduction to the town, made me feel welcome, like there are still good people in this world. They are so nice to me, I always feel safe when I'm with them."
Donnie: "Uhh... I don't really know a lot about them. I don't get out much, I prefer to stay at home, but they're really popular with everyone and even have a band. I'm almost a little intimidated by how opposite we are. Though in the Mirror World, their power is staggering. Their lung capacity is unmatched, which I guess makes sense with the amount of instruments they play..."
Dusk: "Archie is one of my closest friends. When they first moved to Casus in high school, they encouraged me to focus more on percussion and getting my feelings out on a drum set. Honestly, I thought they were crazy at first, but I find myself tapping drumsticks on tables when I need to relax. When they asked me to be part of their band, I was stunned - I can't even read sheet music, but they saw my potential. They see potential in everyone. It's rare to find a person so dedicated to being your best self like Archie is,"
Quill: 🎶👯♀️⭐️
╰┈➤[🖑] Identity
Archie Tissera is half Trinidadian on their fathers side and half Sri Lankan on their mothers side.
Archie Tissera is a lesbian, nonbinary individual.
𝄔𝄅𝄢𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄂
╰┈➤[❤] Likes
Music
String instruments
Energy drinks
Fashion
Nails and nail art
╰┈➤[⊘] Dislikes
Out-of-tune instruments
Singing (in front of an audience)
Snow
Being bored/under stimulated
Bugs
Romantic films, romcoms
𝄔𝄅𝄢𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄂
╰┈➤[𐙚] Backpack
Flip phone
Sweet gum
Key chain with guitar dangle
Kitty coin purse
Notebook with elephant
Sheet music workbook
Custom made conductors baton
Bow wax
Earplugs
Metronome and tuner
Bag of candy
Pencil case
eBop Shuffle
𝄔𝄅𝄢𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄅𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄚𝄂
╰┈➤[☀] Powers
How does Archie Tissera's power manifest?
Upon tapping into the Mirror World, Archie Tissera discovered their powers of Soundwaves, Winds, and Vibrations. This power likely stems from their intense dedication to music and perfecting the craft, growing up as a child prodigy and virtuoso.
How did Archie Tissera discover the Mirror World?
Archie discovered the Mirror World the most recently of the group, working closely with their friend and bandmate, Dusk. When he was late to a rehearsal, they were shocked and decided to follow him for a few days. Knowing that Dusk and Yhat often butt heads, Archie approached Yhat and accused him of bullying or depriving him of his responsibilities. Dusk eventually had to admit he was helping Yhat in the Mirror World, making Archie involved.
What influences Archie Tissera to protect the public and go through The Mirror World?
The Mirror World takes all the joy and energy out of the people who fall in. Thinking of a place where people are devoid of personal enjoyments and freedom hurt Archie so deeply, they vowed to bring everyone back home. Anyone Reflections they rescue gets a personal song written about their journey, making their trips to The Mirror World an act of art and bravery.
╰┈➤[♿︎] Health & Conditions
Autism
Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder
Fibromyalgia
Chronic Migraines
#casus vallis#casus vallis: the protectors#artwork#art#ocs#story#writing#oc#my artwork#casus vallis: archie#worldbuilding#Spotify
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New ca. New... c.... casu...al.............
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Has Trump Derailed a Deep State Plot to Attack Iran?
by Larry C. Johnson | Nov 16, 2024
I believe that the FBI’s announcement on November 8 — three days after Trump’s victory — of an alleged Iranian plot to kill an Iranian American journalist was part of an intelligence information operation to manufacture a casus belli to attack Iran. I wrote about this plot in my last post (read here). I have checked with a retired FBI agent, a retired CIA case officer and a senior former DEA agent and asked them to critique my analysis. They all agreed with my conclusion — i.e., the 2019 bust of Farhad Shakeri in Sri Lanka, while trying to move 92 kilos of heroin, was done with the help of DEA and DEA then recruited Shakeri and CC-1 to become confidential informants. Shakeri apparently was directed to move to Iran and get a job in order to create his bona fides as an Iranian intelligence asset. It is likely that the CIA played a role in orchestrating this operation.
Why? This was part of a broader effort to create a reason to attack Iran and present Donald Trump with a war before he could assume the Presidency. Well, that plan appears to be falling apart. Trump dispatched Elon Musk to NYC to talk to Iran’s UN Ambassador on Friday. Why Elon? It is a clear message to Iran that Trump is serious about engaging them diplomatically because he sent a guy that all of the world knows is a new best friend of Donald. Iran will not be wondering if Elon is speaking on his own. Nope. Elon is doing so with the blessing of Donald Trump. By engaging Iran, Trump is trying to prevent a war, not hasten one.
The frantic freakout underway over Trump’s nominations of some junior Neo-cons and war hawks has led to widespread condemnation among the anti-war crowd. While I share their alarm at the names of Marco Rubio, Pete Hegseth, and Michael Waltz as folks who are on the record advocating stupid military responses to Russia, Iran and China, let me suggest another way to look at this. Trump’s rapid appointments of his cabinet — the fastest in Presidential history — may be intended as a negotiating ploy, with the Deep State and foreign governments.
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sometimes i look through Your ask to feel better about myself.
i wonder, how people go back to their lives after saying such inhumane, animalistic and generally thoughtless things to people they never met.
i have the same thoughts when i see men driving cars. no regard for lives of others - only thing that matters are chemicals in their lizard brains.
(Not to mention fact that Energy grows with speed squered and time decreases with distance over speed. (Parabolic function vs hyperbolic) I don't expect these... i don't even want to say "animals" casue they're above those worthless cunts... to understand basic mid school math)
Yeah I don’t understand either :c some people are just thoughtless and cruel ig, sadly. I guess I’ll just have to be more careful with what I post so people don’t get the wrong ideas and then get mad at me for not liking what the my say to me.
As someone who struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts and also been around people with the same problem, it would never cross my mind to tell someone to kill themselves, not even behind the anonymity. But some people are just cruel
Tbh I’m not sure if I understand the feel better about yourself part or the whole ask but yeah sorry if I misunderstood
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Planet Opi: Every Tachyungulate Family









u/-casu
@c-casu
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FAUNE
Hae duae provinciae bello quondam piratico catervis mixtae praedonum a Servilio pro consule missae sub iugum factae sunt vectigales. et hae quidem regiones velut in prominenti terrarum lingua positae ob orbe eoo monte Amano disparantur.
Ex turba vero imae sortis et paupertinae in tabernis aliqui pernoctant vinariis, non nulli velariis umbraculorum theatralium latent, quae Campanam imitatus lasciviam Catulus in aedilitate sua suspendit omnium primus; aut pugnaciter aleis certant turpi sono fragosis naribus introrsum reducto spiritu concrepantes; aut quod est studiorum omnium maximum ab ortu lucis ad vesperam sole fatiscunt vel pluviis, per minutias aurigarum equorumque praecipua vel delicta scrutantes.
Et eodem impetu Domitianum praecipitem per scalas itidem funibus constrinxerunt, eosque coniunctos per ampla spatia civitatis acri raptavere discursu. iamque artuum et membrorum divulsa conpage superscandentes corpora mortuorum ad ultimam truncata deformitatem velut exsaturati mox abiecerunt in flumen.
Haec ubi latius fama vulgasset missaeque relationes adsiduae Gallum Caesarem permovissent, quoniam magister equitum longius ea tempestate distinebatur, iussus comes orientis Nebridius contractis undique militaribus copiis ad eximendam periculo civitatem amplam et oportunam studio properabat ingenti, quo cognito abscessere latrones nulla re amplius memorabili gesta, dispersique ut solent avia montium petiere celsorum.
Et quia Montius inter dilancinantium manus spiritum efflaturus Epigonum et Eusebium nec professionem nec dignitatem ostendens aliquotiens increpabat, qui sint hi magna quaerebatur industria, et nequid intepesceret, Epigonus e Lycia philosophus ducitur et Eusebius ab Emissa Pittacas cognomento, concitatus orator, cum quaestor non hos sed tribunos fabricarum insimulasset promittentes armorum si novas res agitari conperissent.
Ergo ego senator inimicus, si ita vultis, homini, amicus esse, sicut semper fui, rei publicae debeo. Quid? si ipsas inimicitias, depono rei publicae causa, quis me tandem iure reprehendet, praesertim cum ego omnium meorum consiliorum atque factorum exempla semper ex summorum hominum consiliis atque factis mihi censuerim petenda.
Sed si ille hac tam eximia fortuna propter utilitatem rei publicae frui non properat, ut omnia illa conficiat, quid ego, senator, facere debeo, quem, etiamsi ille aliud vellet, rei publicae consulere oporteret?
Haec igitur lex in amicitia sanciatur, ut neque rogemus res turpes nec faciamus rogati. Turpis enim excusatio est et minime accipienda cum in ceteris peccatis, tum si quis contra rem publicam se amici causa fecisse fateatur. Etenim eo loco, Fanni et Scaevola, locati sumus ut nos longe prospicere oporteat futuros casus rei publicae. Deflexit iam aliquantum de spatio curriculoque consuetudo maiorum.
Itaque tum Scaevola cum in eam ipsam mentionem incidisset, exposuit nobis sermonem Laeli de amicitia habitum ab illo secum et cum altero genero, C. Fannio Marci filio, paucis diebus post mortem Africani. Eius disputationis sententias memoriae mandavi, quas hoc libro exposui arbitratu meo; quasi enim ipsos induxi loquentes, ne 'inquam' et 'inquit' saepius interponeretur, atque ut tamquam a praesentibus coram haberi sermo videretur.
Accenderat super his incitatum propositum ad nocendum aliqua mulier vilis, quae ad palatium ut poposcerat intromissa insidias ei latenter obtendi prodiderat a militibus obscurissimis. quam Constantina exultans ut in tuto iam locata mariti salute muneratam vehiculoque inpositam per regiae ianuas emisit in publicum, ut his inlecebris alios
Hae duae provinciae bello quondam piratico catervis mixtae praedonum a Servilio pro consule missae sub iugum factae sunt vectigales. et hae quidem regiones velut in prominenti terrarum lingua positae ob orbe eoo monte Amano disparantur.
Ex turba vero imae sortis et paupertinae in tabernis aliqui pernoctant vinariis, non nulli velariis umbraculorum theatralium latent, quae Campanam imitatus lasciviam Catulus in aedilitate sua suspendit omnium primus; aut pugnaciter aleis certant turpi sono fragosis naribus introrsum reducto spiritu concrepantes; aut quod est studiorum omnium maximum ab ortu lucis ad vesperam sole fatiscunt vel pluviis, per minutias aurigarum equorumque praecipua vel delicta scrutantes.
Et eodem impetu Domitianum praecipitem per scalas itidem funibus constrinxerunt, eosque coniunctos per ampla spatia civitatis acri raptavere discursu. iamque artuum et membrorum divulsa conpage superscandentes corpora mortuorum ad ultimam truncata deformitatem velut exsaturati mox abiecerunt in flumen.
Haec ubi latius fama vulgasset missaeque relationes adsiduae Gallum Caesarem permovissent, quoniam magister equitum longius ea tempestate distinebatur, iussus comes orientis Nebridius contractis undique militaribus copiis ad eximendam periculo civitatem amplam et oportunam studio properabat ingenti, quo cognito abscessere latrones nulla re amplius memorabili gesta, dispersique ut solent avia montium petiere celsorum.
Et quia Montius inter dilancinantium manus spiritum efflaturus Epigonum et Eusebium nec professionem nec dignitatem ostendens aliquotiens increpabat, qui sint hi magna quaerebatur industria, et nequid intepesceret, Epigonus e Lycia philosophus ducitur et Eusebius ab Emissa Pittacas cognomento, concitatus orator, cum quaestor non hos sed tribunos fabricarum insimulasset promittentes armorum si novas res agitari conperissent.
Ergo ego senator inimicus, si ita vultis, homini, amicus esse, sicut semper fui, rei publicae debeo. Quid? si ipsas inimicitias, depono rei publicae causa, quis me tandem iure reprehendet, praesertim cum ego omnium meorum consiliorum atque factorum exempla semper ex summorum hominum consiliis atque factis mihi censuerim petenda.
Sed si ille hac tam eximia fortuna propter utilitatem rei publicae frui non properat, ut omnia illa conficiat, quid ego, senator, facere debeo, quem, etiamsi ille aliud vellet, rei publicae consulere oporteret?
Haec igitur lex in amicitia sanciatur, ut neque rogemus res turpes nec faciamus rogati. Turpis enim excusatio est et minime accipienda cum in ceteris peccatis, tum si quis contra rem publicam se amici causa fecisse fateatur. Etenim eo loco, Fanni et Scaevola, locati sumus ut nos longe prospicere oporteat futuros casus rei publicae. Deflexit iam aliquantum de spatio curriculoque consuetudo maiorum.
Itaque tum Scaevola cum in eam ipsam mentionem incidisset, exposuit nobis sermonem Laeli de amicitia habitum ab illo secum et cum altero genero, C. Fannio Marci filio, paucis diebus post mortem Africani. Eius disputationis sententias memoriae mandavi, quas hoc libro exposui arbitratu meo; quasi enim ipsos induxi loquentes, ne 'inquam' et 'inquit' saepius interponeretur, atque ut tamquam a praesentibus coram haberi sermo videretur.
Accenderat super his incitatum propositum ad nocendum aliqua mulier vilis, quae ad palatium ut poposcerat intromissa insidias ei latenter obtendi prodiderat a militibus obscurissimis. quam Constantina exultans ut in tuto iam locata mariti salute muneratam vehiculoque inpositam per regiae ianuas emisit in publicum, ut his inlecebris alios
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