#can’t wait to wake up tomorrow and feel my fave emotion:

[mortalheartache]

Do you think if you snapped a Jedi’s dick it’d glow like a glowstick. Would the color match their saber. If you end up on the dark side and bleed your kyber crystal does your dick glow red. this is so important to me

I had a quarter of a glass of wine but I’m gonna put the blame on it anyways because I refuse to take responsibility for that question. I am dead sober but pretend the wine did this please thanks I need to save my dignity

[deerlino]

lost and found.

bang chan x fem!reader / you and chan are about to get married, but the day before the wedding, he just disappears. there’s a note on your bed, and from that point on, everything goes downhill.

additional tags / angst, hurt-comfort, emotional turmoil, wedding jitters, cold feet, open ending, love confessions, pre-wedding drama, visuals (text messages, letter), apologies — 963 words in total.

content warnings / abandonment, lack of communication, commitment issues, panic and anxiety (subtle), facing fears (fear of the future ?), some strong language (cussing), chan’s kind of an asshole (😅)

further notes / writing angst is so much fun, seriously my fave genre ever. 😝 been all about the fluffy stuff lately, but i had to dive back into my roots and whip up some tasty pre-wedding angst. what do you think? i'm totally loving it, heheh. hope you enjoy the ride! <3

The day before your wedding, you can’t help but feel a buzz of excitement and nervousness. You've waited for this moment for so long, and now it's almost here. You and Chan have been inseparable since you met, and tomorrow was supposed to be the start of your forever. But when you wake up that morning, something feels off.

You stretch out your hand, expecting to find Chan beside you, but the bed is cold. Frowning, you sit up, scanning the room for any sign of him. That’s when you see it—a note on his pillow. Your heart sinks as you reach for it, hands trembling.

You stare at the words, not comprehending. Had to leave? What does that even mean? Panic starts to rise in your chest as you read the note over and over again, hoping it will magically change or offer some explanation. But it doesn’t.

You grab your phone and dial his number, but it goes straight to voicemail. “Chan, what the hell is going on? Where are you? Call me back, please,” you plead, trying to keep your voice steady.

Hours pass, and still no word from Chan. You call his friends, his family, anyone who might know where he is, but no one has seen him. Every minute feels like an eternity, and the worry is gnawing at your insides.

By afternoon, your concern turns to anger. How could he do this to you? The day before your wedding, no less. You pace the living room, clutching your phone, willing it to ring. When it finally does, you almost drop it in your haste to answer.

“Hello?”

“Y/N.” It’s Chan’s voice, but it sounds strained.

“Chan! Where are you? What’s going on?” The questions spill out before you can stop them.

“I... I’m sorry, Y/N. I just... I need some time to think.”

“Think? About what? We’re getting married tomorrow!”

There’s a long pause, and you can hear him take a deep breath. “I know. I just... I’m not sure if I’m ready.”

The words hit you like a punch to the gut. “Not ready? Are you fucking kidding me, Chan? We’ve been planning this for months! Why are you doing this now?”

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” he says quietly.

“Well, guess what? You did hurt me. A lot. And you could’ve talked to me instead of just disappearing.”

“I’m so sorry,” he repeats, but it feels hollow. “I just... I need to figure some things out.”

You hang up, tears streaming down your face. Why would he do this to you? You feel a mix of hurt and rage, your emotions swinging wildly. Part of you wants to find him and demand answers, while another part of you just wants to curl up and cry.

The rest of the day is a blur. You cancel the rehearsal dinner, making up excuses for why Chan isn’t there. Your friends and family try to comfort you, but nothing they say can ease the pain.

That night, you lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, replaying every moment you’ve shared with Chan. You wonder where it all went wrong. Was it something you did? Something you said? The uncertainty is maddening.

The next morning, you wake up to a flurry of text messages. One stands out—it’s from Chan.

You hesitate, fingers hovering over the screen. Part of you wants to ignore him, to make him feel the pain you’re feeling. But the other part of you needs answers.

You arrive at the little park where you and Chan have shared so many memories. He’s sitting on the bench, looking more miserable than you’ve ever seen him. When he sees you, he stands up, but you hold up a hand to stop him.

“Just... explain,” you say, keeping your distance.

He takes a deep breath. “I’ve been freaking out, Y/N. The thought of forever, it just... it scared me. I started doubting everything, and I didn’t know how to tell you.”

“So you ran away instead? That’s real mature, Chan.”

“I know, I know. It was stupid. But I love you, and the idea of losing you terrified me even more.”

You can see the sincerity in his eyes, but the hurt is still too fresh. “You could’ve talked to me. We could’ve worked through it together.”

He nods, looking down. “I’m sorry. I should’ve. I was just so scared of disappointing you, of not being enough.”

You step closer, your anger softening a little. “Chan, we’re supposed to be a team. If you’re scared or unsure, you need to tell me. We face things together, remember?”

He looks up, tears in his eyes. “I remember. And I’m so sorry I forgot that. I promise, I’ll never run away again.”

You take a deep breath, the weight of the past day starting to lift. “This isn’t going to be easy, you know. We’ve got a lot to talk about, and it’s going to take time to rebuild that trust.”

“I know. And I’m willing to do whatever it takes,” he says, stepping closer.

You nod, feeling a small glimmer of hope. “Okay. Let’s start with talking.”

You spend the next few hours sitting on that bench, talking about everything. The doubts, the fears, the future. It’s raw and emotional, but it’s also healing. By the end of it, you both feel a bit lighter.

When you finally stand up, Chan reaches for your hand. “So, about that wedding...”

You give him a small smile. “Let’s take it one day at a time. We’ll get there when we’re both ready.”

And for the first time since you found that note, you believe it.

© deerlino (est. 110624) ༯ heyo, did you enjoy this piece? if you did, maybe you could reblog, drop a comment, or shoot me an ask to let me know your thoughts. also, feel free to check out my other stuff! thanks a bunch for the support! <3

[hajimewhore]

Body Swap 👫 (Iwaizumi Hajime/Reader) ➸Rated T, fem!Reader, 1.6k words  ➷Humor, fluff, awkwardness ofc  ➷ Masterlist, Part 1, ✈Part 2

Thankfully, Hajime’s parents had busied themselves in the morning. Probably out grocery shopping, he’d mentioned off hand.

With Hajime the one blindfolding you now, you can finally place yourself in his shoes, an uneasy humiliation enveloping your bones.

“We can’t exactly dress each other everyday for school, can we?”

You mumble, as Hajime lets you tug the loose tee overhead. It seems he wanted little to do with this dress up game scenario, while simultaneously attempting to save himself from the embarrassment of you catching an eyeful of his junk.

He pulls off the blindfold and stares with an uncomfortable expression and blush. You’ve been doing a lot of blushing today since... well, since you woke up in each other’s bodies.

“I guess not. But I’ll respect your body, don’t worry.”

He huffs, folding his arms across his chest.

A short gasp comes from his lips, clearly not used to having a set of breasts, and he pulls his arms away quicker than you’ve probably ever moved yourself. Hajime awkwardly settles for resting his hands at his hips, and you stifle the snort that threatens to escape.

“I trust you, Hajime. Don’t worry. And same goes for me! I won’t eat junk food before bed, and I’ll work out a lot too!”

You announce while fist pumping the air, and he rolls his eyes.

“You better. Come on, let’s go before my mom and dad get back.”

A lot of changes had to be made to accommodate your... new lifestyle.

You decided it was best to swap phones, considering you each have the same model and should probably be conversing with your classmates and friends with some sort of vague continuity.

You also had a rather short lived and awkward conversation about bathroom time and changing.

And on the way to the park, you discussed the people you each talked with the most in class, how to talk to them, and to take notes properly.

You’re thorough if anything, trying to make this awful situation as easy as you can possibly make it.

“This is exhausting... and we haven’t even gotten to play volleyball yet.”

You bounce the volleyball in the grass, huffing at the torture this body swap is turning out to be.

“At least you can spike, and have a mean serve. It would have been way worse for me if you were a libero.”

At least Hajime is looking on the bright side.

“We just have to get used to our bodies.”

You attempt to reason alongside him, amping each other up.

By the time the sun sets, you’re both panting in the grass next to each other. All former encouragements and hype lost, replaced by the dread of the coming Monday.

“We’re so fucked, I’m not used to being this tall, or having these limbs.”

You wave your arms around in the grass for emphasis, turning to gaze at your partner in this disaster.

“I feel like I’ve been launched back to middle school, it’s hard to get used to being short again.”

Hajime hums in agreement.

“I’m not that short! You’re just tall!”

“Not that tall!”

He grimaces, and you think you hear him mutter something about one more centimeter.

Before you can delve back to wallowing in misery, Hajime speaks up again,

“Whatever, we actually started doing pretty good by the end. It’s not the level we’re usually at, but I’m sure we can fake it in practice well enough. Chalk it up to being sick or something. We’ll be back to normal soon enough.”

Sitting upright, he musters a confident look that warms your chest. You’re glad he’s being optimistic, pushing away the negative thoughts that keep rearing up.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. Now let’s get food, I’m starved.”

“Agedashi tofu is the best after practice.”

He’s gleaming, and you think it looks more natural on your face than the stern countenance that seems trademark to Hajime. Though, you do miss the rare occasions you got too see that expression on his normal face... so you make a mental note to take plenty of happy face selfies while you’re in this body.

You can’t help the soft laugh, imagining all the faces you could make in Hajime’s body he wouldn’t be caught dead making normally. When he eyes you warily, you shake your head and respond before he catches on to your plan.

“The katsudon here is way better, you’re crazy.”

You grin, mouth watering as you bring a pork cutlet to your lips.

When you bite in, it turns out to be less satisfying than you remembered. 

‘Weird, this place has really good katsudon.’

When you peer over at Hajime, he seems to be sharing a similar dilemma.

“How is it?”

You tilt your head up, gazing cautiously at him.

“It’s... okay.”

He frowns, can he seriously not enjoy agedashi tofu right now? Or was it just made bad?

“Right. Same here.”

The two of you pause, stewing for a second at the disappointment of your favorite meals, before both having the same idea to swap plates.

When you bite into your newly swapped dishes, you both simultaneously break out into wide grins.

“Whaaat, this is so good!”

“’katsudon’s not so bad either.”

You burst out into laughter, 

“I guess our tastes have been swapped too.”

“I was beginning to think this would just be a nightmare. But there’s some fun things involved.”

Hajime hums, taking another hearty bite from the katsudon. You smile at his enthusiasm, before returning to your dish.

 You continue to idly chatter about things that might be important to know, before walking home together.

When you reach the end of the street, Hajime almost makes the mistake of turning to the Iwaizumi residence. When he freezes, you realize you were equally ready to freely waltz into your own house.

You both awkwardly switch sides on the sidewalk, silently acknowledging the blunder with a light laugh.

“I’ll text you if I think of anything else. Have a good night,” you pause, “Y/N!” 

You wink at him, chuckling at the sour expression. If you thought referring to yourself as Hajime was weird, it’s even more unsettling to call yourself by name.

Hajime rolls his eyes before waving goodbye.

“Yeah yeah... Hajime. See you tomorrow.”

The interaction certainly is odd, but you laugh with a grin nonetheless. Despite the fucked up situation, it’s kind of cool to have a secret to share with Hajime.

You just hope it isn’t permanent.

When Hajime turns to the your household, he feels the nervousness come back full force.

The two of you spent all day with each other, not really worried about a stranger’s perception of them.

But now he has to deal with the people closest to you, your parents. And he’s actually quite fond of your parents, they’ve always treated him like the son they never had (as well as Oikawa), but he’s not exactly looking forward to living out their wish for a son vicariously through you.

He swings open the door, kicking his shoes off before stepping inside.

“I’m home!”

‘Remember to be enthusiastic, and keep that RBF in check!’ he hears your insistent reminder echo in his mind, almost catching himself scowling.

“Welcome back darling! Did you eat?”

He hears your mother’s voice from the kitchen.

“I had something to eat with Hajime.”

He sweats a little, your mom is oddly calculated, always in tune with your emotions. Sometimes even his, but there’s no way she’d figure out what was going on, right?

“Good. If you get hungry later, there’s left overs.”

He calls out a thanks, almost sighing in relief, looks like the panic was for nothing. 

Hajime casually (yet so, so, eagerly) heads for the stairs.

“Where are you going? Aren’t you going to say hi to Tooru? He and his mother came for dinner!”

WHAT.

“Y/N-chan! You and Iwa-chan were hanging out today? We’re you practicing volleyball?”

As if on cue, Oikawa rounds the corner and cuts Hajime off at the stairs, eyeing the athletic attire he’s wearing,

“I have something I want to practice more, you should’ve texted me.”

He huffs, arms folded as he leans against the stairway’s frame. Clearly a trick, Oikawa blew up both of your phones all day long despite being told you were busy. Hajime resists the urge to scowl at the backhanded comment. Brat.

Wait a second... how exactly do you talk to Oikawa again? Hajime should know, he’s spent a majority of his life with the two of you, but he’s currently drawing blanks.

He seems to have wracked his brain a little too long for a normal interaction, as Oikawa’s eyeing him again with an inquisitive look.

“Sorry... Tooru. You were sleeping in, and we both just happened to wake up early. Besides, you shouldn’t be practicing so much.”

He’s glad he didn’t let the ‘Shittykawa’ slip, that wouldn’t have been on brand for you at all. Out of habit though, he did punch Tooru in the arm.

“Yow! So mean, why are you hitting me?!”

Oikawa cries out, looking utterly scandalized as he rubs the sore spot on his arm.

“Because you deserve it.”

Hajime rolls his eyes, hopefully you won’t become aware of this interaction or he’ll get an earful from you. He’s still slightly convinced he’s an innocent bystander affected by some sort of cosmic punishment on Oikawa Tooru.

“Are you mad at me?!”

Hajime ignores Oikawa’s cry of complaint, jogging up the stairs. It’s hard being you, he grimaces as he beelines for the safety your room.

Finally in the comfort of privacy, he collapses into your sheets with a sigh of relief.

It could barely be considered a conversation with your mother, and Oikawa, but he’s already feeling mentally exhausted from the social exchange.

And tomorrow marks the start of the school week. Great.

Hajime slumps into your absurd amount pillows (seriously, you only need one). If he feels a little disappointed that he can’t recognize your scent anymore, he certainly doesn’t admit it, and definitely doesn’t entertain the intrusive thought longer than a moment.

A/N: I’m actually having so much fun with this au it’s adsklag;hj, I just like to watch my faves suffer in a chaotic mess I can not lie

Masterlist, Part 1, ✈Part 2, Part 3​

[just-another-ficwriter]

Agent In Training

Pairing: Agent!Reader x Agent!Sweet Pea

Words: 1400ish

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of a gun, a little violence if you can call it that

Summary: When Phil Coulson puts together a new team of agents, Sweet Pea is forced to be Y/N's Supervising Officer and train her in combat.

Notes: So I've been binge watching Agents of S.H.E.I.L.D and that's where I got this idea to fill the Coworkers square on my @riverdalebingo card! Okay so hear me out, just imagine Agent Coulson recruiting our Riverdale faves for his team!! Jug and Betty would be an unstoppable duo that can solve any problem, the rest of the team rely heavily on them for research and weapon tec. They have undeniable chemistry that everyone can see but them. Vee would be a badass that could break a guys arm with her pinky, she never shows emotion but she always get what she wants. The others never know whether to admire her or fear her. Pea would be the mysterious muscle, no one knows anything about him other than he always seems to be in a bad mood. But he has a super soft spot for the team and would do anything to protect them. And the readers a loveable rule breaker that somehow ended up on the team with no real experience or training but wouldn’t change it for the world. I need to write it!!!!

"Absolutely not." Sweet Pea’s jaw is set, and Jug and Betty collectively hold their breaths. They’ve only been on the ship together for six days but everyone’s aware of how defiant he can be and how persistent it makes Coulson.

"I agree with smiley.” You draw a sip from your beer and send Sweet Pea your best sarcastic grin before rolling your eyes. “Physical training sounds like my own personal hell."

"It wasn't a request Agents; it was a command." Coulson puts his foot down, Veronica nodding beside him. Sweet Pea stiffens in his seat, he knows he can’t argue with the logic no matter how bad he wants to. "Y/N if you want to be part of this team you need to know how to defend yourself, so you aren't a liability in the field."

But you don’t share Sweet Pea’s restraint and immediately start pushing back. "Then what about Betty and Jug? Shouldn't they have to go through this torture too?"

"Oh, Jug and I know how to fight." You can’t hold back the laugh that follows, and Betty’s smile turns into a smirk. "Punch me if you don't believe me."

"Betts I'm not punching you." You scoff. Part of you doesn’t want to hurt your new friend while another part is worried that Betty can actually hold her own.

"I mean, if you're too scared." Betty shrugs, her tone teasing.

"Fine." You’re barely on your feet, fist just about raised before the blonde’s blocking the move. She twists your arm until it clicks painfully, and you can’t help but wince. Betty spins your whole body around with easy, her own arm locked around your neck with a shocking amount of pressure and you wave your hands in defeat. "Okay, okay I believe you!"

Jughead’s holding back a laugh and Sweet Pea just smirks, you can feel the heat of embarrassment raising in your cheeks.

"Training starts tomorrow, rest up." Coulson sends Betty a wink, before leaving the room chuckling.

-

Your eyes are barely open when you wonder into the training room the next morning, already yawning.

"You're late." Sweet Pea frowns from where he’s already stretching on the mats and you instinctively huff, annoyed at how alert he already seemed to be so early.

"I'm not use to waking up at 6am." You drag your feet behind you on the way to the mat as a last attempt of resistance.

"Well get used to it, you need to be up early to fit three training sessions in a day." You catch the way his lips twitch up into a smirk and you’re sure he’s doing it just to get under your skin but your eyes still widen in disbelief.  

"You're kidding me right?" You huff, glaring straight at him.  

"Not at all." He holds the amusement on his face as he starts wrapping your hands, pulling a little too tight. "And if you're late again, I'll make you do press ups for every minute."

Something tells you he isn’t joking.

It’s only when he starts to really get into the training that you start to focus. You listen intently as he talks you through your stance and the basic moves, determine to prove yourself. "First rule of boxing, always keep your hands up."

"So what’s next, how to kick?" The sarcasm rolls of your tongue before you can stop it and you’re surprised when he laughs.

"Maybe when you stop punching like a girl." He counters.

You narrow your eyes, more at the hint of playfulness he was showing than the actual comment he made. "I am a girl."

-

"Damn it!" Your voice echoes off the walls as you cry out, arms struggling under his hold. You were frustrated, you were really trying, and it still seemed impossible. He was too fast, too tall for you to block his attacks. You were failing, and your anger was getting harder to control.

"Your stance is all wrong." You can feel Sweet Pea’s hand resting on your hip, his touch is feather light but it burns through the fabric of your uniform. His breath is hot on the back of your neck and you swallow thickly before he’s pushing you forward and you’re stumbling away. "Try again."

The exercise starts over. You know what he’s about to do, know what you have to do to stop him. But just as you spin under his arm and reach for the gun in his hands, he blocks the attack and has the barrel pointed at your chest. Again.

You’d be dead if this was real.” He states, almost emotionless.

"Maybe if we just started off a bit slower?" You suggest, but his hold on you doesn’t budge.

"You wouldn't have time to slow this down if this was real." His arms tighten around your chest, you can’t see his face but just the patronizing sound of his voice sets a fire off inside of you that you’d be trying to hold at bay. "Get your head in the game."

"I know you don't like me but maybe if you could stop being an asshole for five minutes then maybe I could concentrate." You bite back, trying to get out of his grip but he still doesn’t relax it.

"I never said I didn't like you." He whispers directly into your ear and you know you need to focus, but there’s something oddly attractive about the way he says it. But you barely have time to think about it before he’s pushing you away again. "Now try again."

-

All the air leaves your body as he throws you over his shoulder and slams you down on the mat. A shadow of a smirk graces his lips as he towers over you, his hands on either side of your head. "Always remember to focus on your surroundings Agent."

You see opportunity in his teasing and immediately wrap your legs around his waist, using your things to overpower him and roll you both over. "Who's losing focus now?"

He wants to laugh but the sound gets stuck in his throat when he realises the way your straddling him, chests pressed together with your hand pressed into his neck. You can barely focus on your breathing as he just stares up at you, frozen in place.

"Am I interrupting something?" Jughead’s eyes are as wide as yours and he almost drops his tablet at the sight.

Sweet Pea practically throws you off him before he’s scrambling to his feet. "No we were just uh, finishing up."

"Good, Coulson's looking for you both." Sweet Pea doesn’t say another word as he hurries off, cheeks turning red. Jug waits until he’s disappeared before he raises an eyebrow and grins at you knowingly. "That looked cozy."

"Shup Jug."

Riverdale Winter Bingo Masterlist

Forever Taglist: @p-marie-sp

Sweet Pea Taglist: @80sand90simagine @wildberryyyy @hopelesslylosttheway

[rowansimp]

lonely hours - daniel seavey

please like and reblog :)

“You said that I’d get to have you all weekend. Why can’t you just tell them you can’t go?” - “Because it’s my job, and it’s important.” - “And I’m not?”

I have been looking forward to this day for forever. by forever, I mean the last few months. daniel had a pretty hectic schedule. he spent almost the whole year on tour with the boys. when he wasn't on tour, he was in the studio pouring emotions into songs all day and night. I'm so happy and proud of him for living his dreams but, as selfish as it sounds, it gets lonely all by yourself.

a few months ago, we made a deal that we would go out on a proper date today and then the day after, on saturday, we would go on a roadtrip around california. I woke up feeling ecstatic, full of joy that I get to see my favorite person today.

I woke up around 9 am and texted daniel good morning, like I do every morning that he’s not home. after that, I had breakfast and walked daisy, our adorable maltipoo. daniel said he would pick me up at 9 pm and it was only noon so I figured I could watch some episodes of the vampire diaries before getting ready.

“you hate me because you loved me. you tortured me because you still do. and that, my brother is your humanity.”

i cried my eyes off while stefan was trying to find damon’s humanity. like i haven’t watched this show 5 times already.

i checked the clock and seeing it was already half past 4, i decided to get ready.

after i showered and washed my hair, i put my faves music playlist.

as soon as i sat down on my the chair of my makeup table, all i want by kodaline started playing. that's our song. a big smile was playing on my face.

i went for a natural look but also put red lipstick, daniel’s favourite which i paired with a matching knee length red dress. i gathered all my things since it was almost 9 pm and i figured daniel would be here soon.

9 pm. he should be here any second.

9:30 pm. daniel still wasn’t here. he is never late.

10 pm. a phone call and 2 worried texts later, he still wasn’t here.

11 pm. after 2 calls to daniel ,1 to zach and no answers, he still wasn’t here.

midnight. i give up. he stood me up. absolutely wonderful.

on the verge of breaking down, i dialed a number i know so well. not even 5 seconds later, alessia, my best friend answered.

“y/n? is everything okay? what happened?”

with warm tears streaming down my face i said: “he freaking stood me up alessia.”

“daniel? what do you mean he stood you up? you two have been talking about this date for forever! “

“well he obviously had something more important happening in his life. something more important than us.”

“aww honey i’m so sorry, give me a minute to get dressed and i’m coming over.”

“no,actually,please don’t. i’m too tired.”

“are you sure? you know it’s not a problem.”

“i’m sure,i promise. i’ll see you tomorrow ?”

“i love you so much okay?”

“i love you too alessia.”

with even more tears streaming down my face, i ended the call trying to calm my breathing.

not even a minute later, i heard familiar footsteps across the hall and a key in the lock. i don’t wanna do this.

the doors opened and the tired face of my boyfriend greeted me as a hello.

“hey baby, what are you doing up so late? i know i said i would get home early but me and boys stayed in the studio all day writing a song. gosh i can’t wait for you to hear it.” he said as he opened the door of our fridge and decided on some leftover pizza.

silence.

“you’re all dressed up, did you go out with the girls? you look amazing.” he said as he closed the fridge.

more silence.

“tomorrow morning i’m waking up early to go to the studio so we could record the new song. is that okay?” he said as he kissed my wet cheek.

his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“y/n? baby what’s wrong? why are you crying? did something happen?”

“aren't you forgetting something daniel?"

“what did i forget? what’s wrong?”

“we’ve been talking about this day for months and you stood me up.”

daniel’s eyes widened as realization hit him.

“y/n. i’m so sorry, i completely forgot. i promise i’ll make it up to you tomorrow when i get home from the studio.”

“when you get home from the studio? daniel are you serious? we never see each other anymore. “

“yes we do, what are you talking about?”

“you said that i’d get to have you all weekend. why can’t you just tell them you can’t go?”

“because it’s my job, and it’s important.” daniel raised his voice.

“and i’m not?” a quiet sob escaped my lips.

“of course you are, it’s just that i’m so busy.”

“do you even love me anymore?” my vision was blurry.

daniel’s blue eyes finally softened. it was that question that made him realise what a fool he was.

“y/n, honey of course i love you. more than anything. i’m so sorry. i’m such an idiot.�� he said with pools of tears in his eyes.

y/n’s tears soaked daniel’s yellow hoodie.

“please stop crying, my heart is breaking seeing you like this.”

“please don’t do this to me ever again. it gets so lonely without you daniel. i can’t take it anymore.”

daniel's heart broke.

“i won’t. i’m so sorry. i don’t deserve you.”

we stood in the middle of our living room, hugging, our hearts intertwined.

“how about i call the boys tomorrow morning and tell them that we’ll be gone for a week?

“yes,please.”

“how about we go to new york? it’s your favorite.”

“hmm” i murmured into his chest as my favorite smell of his perfume put me to sleep.

“come on,let’s go to sleep. i love you so much.”

“i love you too daniel. more than anything. "

@samithedaydreamer @kvd963 @zachheroin @bree-the-cute-glitterpuff @why-dont-we-everything @bessonbear @tempus-ut-luceant @wdwbabes @superseavey ♡

[espejonight28738]

The Destiel Story (A Playlist)

Merry Christmas! Here’s my gift to y'all. I made a chronological playlist of destiel, and I’ll explain each song on by one. Or if you aren’t interested in reading that much (3) HERE you have the spotify playlist :)

Tagging: @verobatto-angelxhunter @agusvedder @legendary-destiel Happpy Holidays :3

04×01/04×06 Infra-red -Three Days Grace Just getting to know each other

Everyone’s living in black and white We see each other in a different light That’s why I look at you like I do Like nobody else is even in the room [...] In Infra-red The heat and the light and the way you move Like nobody else is in the room If you fall into me, I fall into you I see you, I see you

04×07/04×20 You Found Me - The Fray In 04×07 we have the whole “I’ll tell you something if you promise not to tell another soul”, so trust begins to flourish here.

Lost and insecure You found me, you found me Lying on the floor Surrounded, surrounded Why’d you have to wait? Where were you, where were you? Just a little late You found me, you found me

04×21/ 05×03 - Angel With a Shotgun - The Cab You know, rebel against heaven and everything you ever believed for a friend. It’s casual.

They say before you start a war You better know what you’re fighting for Well baby, you are all that I adore If love is what you need, a soldier I will be I’m an angel with a shotgun Fighting til’ the wars won I don’t care if heaven won’t take me back I’ll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe Don’t you know you’re everything I have? And I, wanna live, not just survive, tonight

04×05 - Stoned on You - James Young I was about to put Toxic, but I think that joke’s been made to many times already.

Girl, I get stoned on you Rubbing my bones on you (yeah) Nothing else burns like you do (no) Oh Lord, I get stoned on you, oh Stoned!

05×05/22×05 - Dangerous Night - Imagine Dragons Does it happen to y'all that you are trying to stop The Apocalypse, but you keep having gay thoughts about your angel? Annoying, I know

What a dangerous night to fall in love Don’t know why we still hide what we’ve become (oh, oh) Do you wanna cross the line? We’re runnin’ out of time A dangerous night to fall in love Started a stranger, a love endangered The edge of a night The face of an angel, the heart of a ghost Was it a dream?

Time Skip bewtwen s5/s6 Dare I Say - Alexander Rybak If only Cas had kept contact with Dean, I would be able to use Lips Of An Angel, but no, he had to go all MIA. But this song’s still good so. Cas POV, btw.

She doesn’t know that I’m thinking of her […] She makes me glad just by being alright Though I would wish that just for one night She would come back and again we’ll be friends Like those times where love never ends […] You said you love him the last time we met Please tell your boyfriend that I’m not a threat I know the difference between right and wrong […] But dare I say you are amazing in every way? And would you mind if we woke up with each other each day? But then I remember that I’m just a guy And still I keep dreaming of you ‘cause that’s all I can do

06×01/06×19 I’m Not An Angel - Halestorm Cas POV again. S6 is so angsty istg I had like 300 possibles songs for each of the following parts. 

You saw all the signs, but you let it go You closed your eyes […] Hate being that wall That you hit when you feel that you gave it all I keep taking the blame When we both know that I’ll never change […] I wasn’t always this way I used to be the one with the halo But that disappeared when I had my first taste And fell from grace and left me in this place

06×20 Set Fire To The Rain - Adele You can’t have a descent playlist without Adele, amirite? Dean’s POV this time. Poor baby really felt betrayed. The Man Who Would be King is probably one of my faves episodes tbh.

But there’s a side to you That I never knew, never knew All the things you’d say They were never true, never true And the games you play You would always win, always win […] I set fire to the rain And I threw us into the flames Well, it felt something died 'Cause I knew that that was The last time, the last time Sometimes I wake up by the door, That heart you caught must be waiting for you Even now when we’re already over I can’t help myself from looking for you

06×21/06×22 Angels - Within Temptation I love this song so much and it’s so destiel in these episodes I swear I can’t for how much it fits. Dean’s POV

Sparkling Angel, I believed You were my saviour, in my time of need Blinded by faith, I couldn’t hear, All the whispers, the warnings so clear […] You took my heart, deceived me right from the start You showed me dreams, I wish they’d turn into real You broke the promise and made me realize It was all just a lie

07×01/ 07×02 - What Have You Done - Within Temptation  I don’t know whose POV, but this song is so perfect I can’t believe no one has thought of this before.

Would you mind I kill you? Would you mind if I tried to? Cause you have Turn into my worst enemy You carry hate that I don’t feel. It’s over now, what have you done? (What have you done now?) I, I’ve been waiting for someone like you But now you are slipping away (What have you done now?) Why, why does fate make us suffer? There’s a curse between us Between me and you

07×03/07×16 Incomplete - Backstreet Boys And in this Dean Grieving Cas Pt.1, we have a little bit of denial and a lot of heart-brokenness.

I tried to go on like I never knew you I’m awake, but my world if hald asleep I pray for this heart to be unbroken But without you all I’m going to be is incomplete […] I don’t mean to drag it on But I can’t seem to let you go I don’t want to make you face this world alone I want to let you go

07×17 Taking Over Me - Evanescence The Born Again Identity. Dean’s POV. No more comments.

You don’t remember me, but I remember you I lie awake and try so hard not to think of you But who can decide what they dream? And dream I do I believe in you I’ll give up everything just to find you I have to be with you to live to breathe You’re taking over me Have you forgotten all I know And all we had? You saw me mourning my love for you And touched my hand I knew you loved me then

07×18/07×22 Clarity - Zedd Is this a joke about Crazy!Cas? Maybe. But I think it’s mostly serious. Probably.

Cause you are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need Chasing relentlessly Still fight and I don’t know why If our love is tragedy why are you my remedy If our love’s insanity why are you my clarity

Purgatory - A Thousand Years - Christina Perry The Purgatory storyline makes me so emotional I love it so much and now we are going back and- If they don’t solve their problems so I can add Halo to this playlist then what’s even the fucking point.

How to be brave? How can I love when I’m afraid to fall? But watching you stand alone All of my doubt Suddenly goes away somehow One step closer I have died every day waiting for you Darling, don’t be afraid I have loved you for a thousand years I’ll love you for a thousand more […] And all along I believed I would find you Time has brought your heart to me I have loved you for a thousand years I’ll love you for a thousand more

08×01/08×07 The Night We Met - Lord Huron Dean trying to deal with his feelings about leaving Cas behind, and his really platonic hallucinations.

I had all and then most of you Some and now none of you Take me back to the night we met I don’t know what I’m supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met

08×08/08×16 Somebody That I Used To Know - Gotye Dean’s POV hurting because Cas is acting strange and doesn’t respond to his prayers even after all they lived together in Purgatory.

But you didn’t have to cut me off Make out like it never happened and that we were nothing And I don’t even need your love But you treat me like a stranger and that feels so rough No, you didn’t have to stoop so low Have your friends collect your records and then change your number I guess that I don’t need that though Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

08×17 Find my way back - Eric Arjes Cas finding his way to Dean even with Naomi’s brainwashing :D

On my way now Don’t give up on me And no one knows what What tomorrow brings These weary eyes will never rest Until they look in yours again […] There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do I’ll find my way back to you I’ll find my way back to you I’ll find my way back Into the dark to chase your heart No distance could ever tear us apart There’s nothing that I wouldn’t do I’ll find my way back to you

08×18/09×02 Hold On - Chord Overstreet Cas bailing on Dean -again-, and going AWOL -again-, and then saying he will close Heaven and probably die, or in the least never see each other again.

Loving and fighting Accusing, denying I can’t imagine a world with you gone The joy and the chaos, the demons we’re made of I’d be so lost if you left me alone […] I don’t wanna let go I know I’m not that strong I just wanna hear you Saying baby, let’s go home Let’s go home Yeah, I just wanna take you home Hold on, I still want you Come back, I still need you

09×03 To Good at Goodbyes - Sam Smith I won’t comment this chapter bc it still hurts me :) “You can’t stay”

I know you’re thinking I’m heartless I know you’re thinking I’m cold I’m just protecting my innocence I’m just protecting my soul […] But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry And every time you walk out, the less I love you Baby, we don’t stand a chance, it’s sad but it’s true I’m way to good at goodbyes

09×06 Do I Wanna Know - Artic Monkeys This is POV both of them kinda, I don’t know how to explain it, it just gives me the vibe. An alternative to this if you like music in spanish, is “Ex de verdad” from Ha-Ash. I think that one is much funnier for the situation, but I decided for english only :(

Do I wanna know If this feelin’ flows both ways? (Sad to see you go) Was sorta hopin’ that you’d stay (Baby, we both know) That the nights were mainly made For sayin’ things that you can’t say tomorrow day Crawlin’ back to you Ever thought of callin’ when You’ve had a few? 'Cause I always do Maybe I’m too Busy bein’ yours To fall for somebody new Now, I’ve thought it through Crawlin’ back to you

09×07/09×23 I Would Do Anything For Love - Meat Loaf “His true weakness is revealed. He’s in love. With Humanity.”

As long as the planets are turning As long as the stars are burning As long dreams are coming true You’d better believe it, that I would do Anything for love Oh I would do anything for love Oh I would do anything for love

10×01/ 10×03 My Demons - Starset This is completely serious. I swear.

Take me over the walls below Fly forever Don’t let me go I need a savior to heal my pain When I become my worst enemy The enemy […] Take me high and I’ll sing Oh you make everything okay (okay, okay) We are one in the same Oh you take all of the pain away (away, away) Save me if I become My demons

10×04 /10×22 No Rest -Dry the River A.K.A time for the angsty parallel Cain/Colette & Dean/Cas

Did you see the light in my heart? Did you see the sweat on my brow? Did you see the fear in my heart? Did you see me bleeding out? I loved you in the best I loved you in the best way possible I loved you in the best way possible I loved you in the best way possible I loved you in the best

10×23 /11×10 Next to Me - Imagine Dragons -I almost killed you bc of the Mark of Cain and then you almost killed me with Rowena’s spell but still here we are.

Oh, I always let you down You’re shattered on the ground But still I find you there Next to me And oh, stupid things I do I’m far from good, it’s true But still I find you Next to me

11×11/11×22 If You Only Knew - Shinedown *Violently pinning while Cas is being Lucifer’s vessel*

If you only knew How I refuse to let you go, Even when you’re gone I don’t regret any days I Spent, nights we shared, Or letters that I sent It’s 4:03 and I can’t sleep Without you next to me I Toss and turn like the sea If I drown tonight, bring me Back to life Breathe your breath in me The only thing that I still believe In is you, if you only knew […] You help me live and learn

11×23 I’ll Follow You Into The Dark - Gavin Mikhail “I could go with you” GOD do they make me cry

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied And illuminate the no’s on their vacancy signs If there’s no one beside you when your soul embarks Then I’ll follow you into the dark

12×01 Arms - Christina Perry That hug so cute, my babies.

I tried my best to never let you in to see the truth And I’ve never opened up I’ve never truly loved 'till you put your arms around me And I believe that it’s easier for you to let me go […] You put your arms around me and I’m home

12×02/12×09 I Found - Amber Run *Pining bc Cas doesn’t pay attention to you because he is looking for Lucifer*

I’ll use you as a warning sign That if you talk enough sense then you’ll lose your mind And I’ll use you as a focal point So I don’t lose sight of what I want And I’ve moved further than I thought I could But I missed you more than I thought I would And I’ll use you as a warning sign That if you talk enough sense then you’ll lose your mind

12×10 Hot N Cold - Katy Perry I could have used a more serious one, but the best part of the episode is them bickering like an old married couple.

'Cause you’re hot then you’re cold You’re yes then you’re no You’re in then you’re out You’re up then you’re down You’re wrong when it’s right It’s black and it’s white We fight, we break up We kiss, we make up (You) You don’t really want to stay, no (You) But you don’t really want to go-o

12×11 - Losing your Memory - Ryan Star This is the episode where Dean gets witched into amnesia.

Call all your friends And tell them you’re never coming back Cause this is the end Pretend that you want it […] I would have died I would have loved you all my life You’re losing your memory now You’re losing your memory now You’re losing your memory now You’re losing your memory, now

12×12 In The Name of Love - Martin Garrix, Bebe Rexha “I love you.” *looks at Dean* “I love all of you" 

If I told you this was only gonna hurt If I warned you that the fire’s gonna burn Would you walk in? Would you let me do it first? Do it all in the name of love Would you let me lead you even when you’re blind? In the darkness, in the middle of the night In the silence, when there’s no one by your side Would you call in the name of love? In the name of love, name of love In the name of love, name of love

12×13/12×18- I Don’t Wanna Live Forever - ZAYN, Taylor Swift *Cas keeps going after Lucifer’s child instead of paying attention to Dean*

Been sitting eyes wide open behind these four walls, hoping you’d call It’s just a cruel existence like there’s no point hoping at all Baby, baby, I feel crazy, up all night, all night and every day Give me something, oh, but you say nothing What is happening to me? […] I just wanna keep calling your name until you come back home

12×19 Thank You - Led Zeppelin This song has absolutely no relation to the episode but I KNOW Dean put it in the mixtape in hopes that Cas would do 1+1 and understand his confession, but he didn’t. And you can pry that headcanon from my COLD DEAD FINGERS.

If the sun refused to shine I would still be loving you When mountains crumble to the sea There will still be you and me Little drops of rain whisper of the pain Tears of loves lost in the days gone by My love is strong, with you there is no wrong Together we shall go until we die My, my, my inspiration is what you are to me Inspiration look, see

12×23 Slipped Away - Avril Lavigne :)))) Do not think of Dean on his knees next to Cas’ body and the burned wings.

Now you’re gone, now you’re gone There you go, there you go Somewhere I can’t bring you back Now you’re gone, now you’re gone There you go, there you go Somewhere, you’re not coming back The day you slipped away Was the day I found it won’t be the same, no The day you slipped away Was the day that I found it won’t be the same, oh

13×01/ 13×05 Dark Paradise - Lana de Rey Dean grieving Cas Pt.2 but this time he takes it like, a thousand times worse.

All my friends tell me I should move on I’m lying in the ocean, singing your song Ah, that’s how you sing it Loving you forever, can’t be wrong Even though you’re not here, won’t move on Ah, that’s how we play it And there’s no remedy for memory your face Is like a melody, it won’t leave my head Your soul is haunting me and telling me That everything is fine But I wish I was dead Every time I close my eyes It’s like a dark paradise No one compares to you I’m scared that you won’t be waiting on the other side

13×06 Better Than I Know Myself - Adam Lambert Brokebacknatural. Dean being a happy ray of sunshine now that he got his sunshine back.

Cold as ice And more bitter than a December Winter night That’s how I treated you And I know that II sometimes tend to lose my temper And I cross the line Yeah that’s the truth I know it gets hard sometimes But I could never Leave your side No matter what I say 'Cause if I wanted to go I would’ve gone by now but I really need you near me To keep my mind off the edge If I wanted to leave I would’ve left by now But you’re the only one that knows me Better than I know myself

Emm… from here I’ll be skipping many episodes because, as you know, the writers decided that Dean and Cas didn’t need to interact for anything other than talking about Jack, because it’s not like they had a profound bond or anything, right? 

14×22 September - Daughtry Dean seeing what would have been of Cas if they haven’t met.

Of all the things I still remember Summer’s never looked the same The years go by and time just seems to fly But the memories remain In the middle of September we’d still play out in the rain Nothing to lose but everything to gain Reflecting now on how things could’ve been It was worth it in the end

13×23/14×02 Hymn for the Missing - Red *Reverse pinning now with Cas pinning for a Dean that’s being Michael’s vessel*

Where are you now? Are you lost? Will I find you again? Are you alone? Are you afraid? Are you searching for me? Why did you go? I had to stay Now I’m reaching for you Will you wait, will you wait? Will I see you again?

14×03/14×17 Stone - James Young This is… mostly just from 14×14 with Dean and Cas’ talk when Jack went to the bathroom bc they still never talk.

Your father came and went like the ocean’s tide And the day he left he never said goodbye […] You’ve been waiting for a miracle all your life […] So give me all your pain And love will set you free Give all your shame Put all your weight on me And I’ll be the stone you need me to be

14×18 /15×02 Bad Guy - Set it Off Look! They are talking again and- and now they are fighting. And Dean is blaming Cas for things that weren’t his fault. *sighting* Cas POV

I stole the moon I made the stars align I showed you how to fly And you made me the bad guy I fought for you I kept you safe at night I would have risked my life And you made me the bad guy

15×03 Fade - Lewis Cappaldi The DivorceTM 

Well, I know that we’ve been hardly holding on To tell the truth, I can’t believe we got this far Running near on empty I wish somebody would’ve told me That I’d end up so caught up in need of your demons That I’d be lost without you leading me astray Guess that I’m a fool for the way that you caught me Girl, you make my heart break more every day But don’t fade away

15×04/15×06 - Always - Gavin James And now we are pretending you are okay with the fact Cas dumped you? Okay, let’s pretend the drinking and comfort food ain’t signals of depression

What am I supposed to do without you? Is it too late to pick the pieces up? Too soon to let them go? Do you feel damaged just like I do? Your face, it makes my body ache It won’t leave me alone And this feels like drowning Trouble sleeping Restless dreaming You’re in my head Always, always I just got scared Away, away I’d rather choke on my bad decisions Then just carry them to my grave You’re in my head Always, always, always

15×07- Feel Something - James Young I Don’t Miss My Ex, so I’ll go have a good time with my other ex- oh no his evil. Oh no I had to kill him. Oh no I came back home and Cas won’t even look at me. Damn.

Touch me someone I’m too young to feel so Numb, numb, numb, numb […] So if you’re gonna stay, then stay But if you’re gonna go Make sure that you hurt me just enough to Make me feel something, something

15×08 Habits of My Heart - James Young So now we are pretending we aren’t sending indirects to each other? Fine. And you still don’t look at me even when you heal me AND NOT TOUCH ME. FINE.  And now our brothers are sending us to the time when our love was strongest? Where I spent a year praying to you and looking for you? I place that feels pure? Oh fuck.

You know I’d rather be alone, yeah But then you call me on the phone Oh the habits of my heart I can´t say no It’s ripping me apart You get too close You make it hard to let you go […] 'Cause I’d rather be alone But you fermented in my bones

(Note: You can measure my failure by the fact the word Angel was only 4 times in all this list.)

[sunflowerstrays]

cut short // yoon dowoon

anon requested this:

first of all, thank you so much for your lovely comment - one of your faves?? that's just made my year ❤️ secondly I know it's a tad short again but I think if I wrote anymore it would just ruin it and ugh I'm so soft for dowoon fluff I would have written forever and that would not have been good! enjoy~

yoon dowoon x reader.

words: 1.5k.

genre: fluff.

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hey! i noticed you requests are open and i wanna take advantage of it while one of my fav bloggers is open!! CAn i request for a day6 dowoon scenario of his girlfriend cutting her hair shoulder length without telling him and his initial reaction is shocked and she gets upset and offended?

You sit and play with your freshly cut hair, anxiously waiting for Dowoon to come home from band practise today. You know that the whole group is coming over for movie night, also known as a reason for Dowoon and you to let your lovely little apartment become a huge fort for a bunch of grown men and their pizza. Usually you look forward to these nights, but tonight has you left with a pit of worry in your stomach.

What if Dowoon hates your new hair length?

Logically, you know that you shouldn’t care about what he thinks because after all, it is your body and you can treat it as you want. Similarly, if he really loved you like he says he does, he wouldn’t care at all - love is about more than one’s appearance, and therefore he ought not to care.

But you still can’t help but worry - the last time you had your dark hair dyed into an ombre he freaked out at the change, but got over it eventually because he knew how happy it had made you. Yet this time you fear he is going to hate it; Dowoon does frequently say how he loves your thick, long hair and that his favourite thing to do of a night when you lay together is to play with it. Now that it is choppy and short that won’t be nearly as easy for him anymore, and you know that he may take offence to that.

Dowoon texts you to say that the boys are downstairs and heading up. As you step from your bedroom to the main area of your small apartment, you glance in the mirror one more time. All the blonde dye has gone, leaving a healthy and short cut in its wake - you could not be happier with how the hair turned out, but that’s only half the battle.

You hear the boy’s way before you see them - Sungjin and Wonpil are loudly bickering about which movie they want to watch before they’ve even made it out of the elevator, and when they are all hammering on your door, you feel like you could throw up. Somehow you manage to keep your stomach in check and not throw up on their shoes as the boys all pull you into a hug and greet you in their overly enthusiastic ways.

Sungjin and Jae are the first to notice your hair as you step back, exclaiming how much they love the new style, and Brian ruffles your hair as he walks past, commenting on how the length suits you so much more.

Dowoon just hangs in the doorway for a second, really staring at your hair and wondering where on earth it has all gone. You feel a crushing sense of sadness coming from him, and feel like you’ve somehow disappointed him in all of your excitement at a change.

“Where’s it all gone?” Is the first thing he says, completely different from what his band mates had said with their lovely compliments as they had walked past. Dowoon steps into the apartment and shuts the door behind him, opening his jaw to say something else before shutting it tightly and shaking his head.

“I wanted a change. Is that too much to ask?” You ask back, snapping more than you intended to - but it was understandable, seeing as he had offended you unintentionally.

Wonpil is the first to notice the tense atmosphere between you two, and steps over to wrap an arm around your shoulders and pull you away. Your shoulders shake with upset and anger, because all in all, it’s your body and you can do what you want with it.

Dragging you into your small kitchen, Wonpil sits you down at the table where you decided to cut your hair all off and puts his hands over yours. You feel your eyes finally feel with tears, the anger at Dowoon quickly melting into just sadness - for him to react like that really has upset you, because you thought that you meant more to him that just appearance.

“He’s probably just in shock, Y/N,” Wonpil says softly, his voice calming your nerves that are running on electricity. “It’s scary to see such change in someone that you love. Remember when you came home one day and had dyed your hair, and he had not expected it all? Guess what he still did? Fall in love with it.”

“He didn’t have to look so disgusted by it though,” you sigh, running your hands through your short hair and regretting all the choices you had made today. Dowoon was indirectly right anyway - the hair probably didn’t suit you anyway.

“That was just an accident, Y/N,” Brian says, strolling into the kitchen and crouching down beside you. He smiles sadly when he sees your glossy eyes. “The human brain is very hard to control, and emotions are like a fight or flight response. He probably couldn’t help his shock, and you just interpreted it as disgust.”

“I for one think you look especially beautiful,” Wonpil carries on, squeezing your hands and giving you a smile bright enough to light the entirety of Korea. “Besides, it’ll grow on Dowoon - he loves you too much to let this get the better of him.”

“Wonpil is definitely right there,” Brian smiles at you, squeezing your knee and grinning at you. “We all wish we had someone who loved you as much as Dowoon does - you are very lucky.”

You smile at the boys, hearing Jae questioning all of Dowoon's life choices as Sungjin lectures him on how to react to your girlfriend’s new hair. Laughing you can't help but feel bad for your partner; he probably doesn't deserve the slander that he's receiving from his best friends. Despite this you can't help but quickly turn your joy for your new hair into hatred for it.

“Okay okay - I don't hate it! I was completely shocked, and I'm going to miss it, but that doesn't mean I hate it!” Dowoon exclaims, his voice filtering through the whole apartment. Wonpil and Brian laugh loudly, and you can't help but smile at the hopelessness in his voice. Deciding that the smile on your face must be good news, Brian and Wonpil stand from their positions and leave the kitchen, Jae shoving Dowoon into the kitchen and shutting the door behind him.

Dowoon sits down opposite you and immediately starts apologising, knowing that he's clearly upset and offended you. You blink away the tears and stare at the table, still not sure if he's just saying it so he hasn't offended you.

“Look, I didn’t mean to react like I did. I was so shocked - we all know that your hair is my favourite physical thing about you and to see it all gone was like losing my arm; I wasn’t expecting it. But that does not mean in any way that I hate your new length,” he says, reaching for your hands and squeezing them. “I think you look equally as beautiful, if not more. You looked so much happier with it, and if it makes you happy, then I know I’m going to love it.”

You smile at Dowoon, thankful to hear this. His reaction was simultaneously what you was fearing and hoping for at the same time. In response he leans over the table and kisses you gently, nudging your nose with his before grinning.

“Besides, I didn’t realise you could pull off every hairstyle known to man. Just don’t show up tomorrow with a different colour, or I might have a heart attack,” Dowoon says, leaning back to clutch his heart and making you laugh with his goofy behaviour.

When the two of you walk hand in hand to the living room, Dowoon’s four best friends cheer him on and look very pleased that you aren’t actually arguing over the length of your hair. Dowoon pulls you on to his lap when he sits on the sofa, leaving enough space so Sungjin doesn’t have to reside to the beanbag again.

As the movie plays and the pizza is ordered, you can tell that Dowoon is quickly falling in love with your new hair. He keeps resting his head on your shoulder, letting the strands tickle his cheek, and when he isn’t doing that he’s curling it between his fingers and giggling to himself like the child he can be.

All that anxiety and upset from earlier melts away each time he presses a kiss to the base of your neck, or giggles as your hair threads through his fingers like water between rocks. You can’t quite believe that he is so comfortable with the lack of hair for him to play with, but it reminds you why you love him so much.

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requests are open <3

[inevitably-johnlocked]

hey, could you maybe repost your list of virgin-sherlock fics? and which ones would you recommend especially. thank you.:)

Hi Nonny! I’m actually currently going through my recs because I knew that this would come up one day! Here’s what I have on it so far; I’ll star my personal faves that you MUST read!

Gigantic by BubbleGumLizard (E, 2,135 w. || PWP, Size Kink) – John seems to avoid Sherlock seeing him naked. Sherlock wants to fix that. This is porn. Part 19 of Mystrade NaNoWriMo 2015 

What He’s Like by magikspell (E, 2,919 w. || Love Confessions, Fluff, First Time, Inexperienced Sherlock) – Realistic first time. They love each other so much. [FAVE!]

Affirmation by jamlockk (E, 3,096 w. || First Time, Dev. Rel., PWP, Love Declarations, Emotional Sherlock, Comforting John, Gross Fluff) – “Sunlight dappled John’s skin, casting a glow across his spreadeagled form as he dozed among the rumpled sheets. Sherlock knew the expression on his face was hopelessly soft but for once did not care about showing his true feelings so openly. He simply stood there, in the doorway, gazing at the impossibly beautiful man currently snuffling softly in his slumber.“ Part 8 of All the ways we love

Well Begun Is Half Done by Avice (E, 3,897 w. || Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Anal/Oral, Seduction, John in Charge, Pining Sherlock, John’s Penis, Bottomlock) – Sherlock is putting together an elaborate plan of seducing John. John grows tired of waiting and takes matters into his own hands.

One Day Like This by nondeducible (E, 4,872 w. || First Time, Bed-Sharing, Romance, Fluff, Virgin Sherlock) – When Sherlock emerged from the bathroom, the sight before him nearly took his breath away. The only light in the room was the small lamp on the bedside table. John’s skin shone like gold, his hair like the purest silver. He was on his side, facing the empty part of the bed, his outstretched hands ready to embrace whoever climbed in next to him. Sherlock could imagine, just for a second, that this was their shared bed and he was coming back to settle into John’s arms.

A Study in Intimacy by doodle (T, 5,183 w.|| First Time, Romance, Virginity, First Kiss) – People don’t touch Sherlock Holmes, not like they touch other people. Then he meets John Watson.

Strings by EstherShapiro (E, 5,267 w. || Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Massage, Friends to Lovers, Fingering, Anal, PWP) – Sherlock wakes his doctor up. Was this weird? John was sitting on his bed, late at night, rubbing his hands over another man’s body? That was supposed to be weird, right? Then again, this wasn’t just some man, it was Sherlock. They were so used to each other that John didn’t even think to question it. It wasn’t weird.

Tease You Till You Come by phoenix089 (E, 6,090 w. || First Time, Clueless Sherlock, Texting) – Initially, Sherlock was rather put out by John’s lack of presence on the case. But then he starts to recieve pictures, several of them, of an unexpected nature. The case is forgotten rather quickly after that.

The Effect of Memory by testosterone_tea (E, 6,430 || Praise Kink, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Smut, Virgin Sherlock, Love Confessions, Confused Sherlock) – John has temporary amnesia coming off of anaesthesia after an operation and not only does he not recognize Sherlock, he starts flirting with him! After John recovers, he doesn’t remember the incident at all. But Sherlock does. Confusion ensues.

Inside by magikspell (E, 6,757 w. || Loss of Virginity, Anal / Rimming, Fluff, Humour, Awkwardness, Shy Sherlock, Bottomlock) – "Being inside someone. Feeling someone inside you.”

The space between by Salambo06 (E, 6,830 w. || PWP, Friends to Lovers, Masturbation, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Miscommunications, Bottom Sherlock, Mutual Pining, Sexual Fantasy) – “It’s for a case,” Sherlock says as soon as John looks down at his computer. John remains silent for a long moment, eyes moving from the screen to Sherlock, before saying, “You don’t have to explain.” His voice is low, too low, and Sherlock looks at the computer, putting the video on pause. “Lestrade asked me-, no, forced me to find out who’s threatening a famous porn star, and the suspect is among his co-stars, so I only need to watch out for any signs from his partners, anything that might show they’re the one sending those threats and I can move to something else.” “Right.”

Drive by lifeonmars (M, 9,537 w. || Virginity, Awkward First Times, Minor Injuries) – John and Sherlock are stranded by the roadside, and John is injured. They need to spend the night in the back of a humvee. Sherlock is confused. John is understanding. [FAVE!]

Paparazzi by SilentAuror (E, 10,543 w. || Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Post S3) – John moves back into 221B Baker Street after his marriage falls apart and the paparazzi won’t leave him and Sherlock alone about the status of their supposed relationship. Sherlock, of course, never denies it, until one day he does…

The Thin Line by Odamaki (M, 10,809 w. || Virgin Sherlock, Awkwardness, Confessions, First Times, Anal) – John swallows. Keeps his eyes on Sherlock. Begs him not to ruin him.Sherlock leans forward over the witness box ever-so slightly, “I was distracted,” he informs the court, “by my partner, John Watson.”

Praise Me by testosterone_tea (E, 11,813 w. || Sherlock POV, Bottomlock, Dev. Rel., Virgin Sherlock, First Kiss / TimeBJ’s, Anal, Praise Kink) – In which Sherlock has an interesting physical reaction to compliments and John discovers it.

Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Missing Christmas Spirit by  SilentAuror (M, 15,002 w. || Christmas, Domesticity, Post S3, Happy Ending) – John hates Christmas. So does Sherlock, but he suggests that they do Christmas "properly” this year to see if they can’t track down its elusive magic and discover for themselves what Christmas is supposed to be about. [FAVE!!!]

In A Changing Age by allonsys_girl (E, 15,590 w. || Victorian AU, Virgin / Demi Sherlock, First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, Mild H/C) – Sherlock wakes up in the 19th century, with no idea how he got there. [FAVE!]

For you, there’s only me by shock_blanket (E, 19,557 w. || Jealous Idiots, Virgin Sherlock, UST/RST, Pining, Miscommunication, First Kiss / Time, Insecure Sherlock, Masturbation) – Sherlock realizes he has fallen in love with John, but believes he is unlovable. Cue lots of pining and jealousy on Sherlock’s part, followed by our favorite cuddly marksman making it all better. Because for Sherlock, there’s only John. [FAVE!]

At the Heart of it All by SilentAuror (E, 19,812 w. || Virgin Sherlock, Post S3, POV John, Domestics, First Time, Kissing, Romance) – John has been back at Baker Street for four months now and thinks it’s about time they had the Talk to see whether or not they could be more than friends. Sherlock has a lot of uncertainty about this concept for multiple reasons. Unabashed romance.

Tomorrow’s Song by agirlsname (M, 24,645 w. || Post-TRF, POV Sherlock, Angst with a Happy Ending, Virgin / Repressed Sherlock, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Pining) – How can he think a relationship with me would be a good idea? I am the sort of person to take a break from my life and when I come back after two years, I expect to find it exactly as I left it. In reality I find it shattered to pieces. (I actually equate you with my life. When did I start doing that?) [FAVE, MUST READ!]

State of Flux by Atiki (E, 24,655 w. || Sherlock POV, Slow Burn, First Kiss/Time, Friends to Lovers, Frottage, Cuddles and Snuggles, Awkwardness, Insecure/Virgin Sherlock, Romance) – John’s marriage is over and he is finally back home (i.e. at Baker Street, where he belongs). Sherlock is awfully insecure and John is awfully hesitant, and they’re both awkward idiots, of course, but they figure it out. Many First Times happen. [FAVE!]

Bedtime Stories by Liketheriver (M, 34,388 w. || Emotional H/C, Romance, Angst & Humour, Bed Sharing, John First Person, TRF, John Whump) – John’s POV during Season 2 and beyond when Sherlock takes up semi-permanent residence in his bed. A collection of codas and missing scenes wrapped up into one long fic and topped with a bow that takes the story beyond Reichenbach and into happy territory once more. Part 1 of Bedtime Universe

The Wrong Wagon by DancingGrimm (E, 35,663 w. || Alternating POV, MollyxJohn [Molly pines for John], Public Sex, Casual Sex, Obliviousness, BAMF!John, Awkwardness, Angst & Humour, First Time, Virgin Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock) – Molly sees John in a new light and realises that she may have hitched her horse to the wrong wagon…or something like that. John pines for Sherlock and worries what he will think if he ever finds out. And Sherlock doesn’t know what Molly’s up to…but he knows he doesn’t like it.

A Promise Made to Be Broken by PlantsAreNeat (E, 37,018 w. || Fake Relationship, Pining, Slow Burn, RST, Eventual Relationship, POV Sherlock) – A young John makes an ‘if we’re still single at 40, we’ll get together’ pledge to a woman who ends up all wrong for him. She keeps reminding him of the promise, and won’t let go of it. John asks Sherlock to pose as his boyfriend at a family wedding, so as to dash her hopes permanently. Sherlock, who has at last acknowledged his feelings for John, reluctantly agrees despite knowing how painful it will be to ‘have’ John, but not keep him. [FAVE FAVE FAVE! MUST READ!!]

Spare Change by Ermerness (E, 51,966 w. || Rich Holmeses AU || First Kiss / Time, Holmes Family, Virgin Sherlock, Anal, First Meetings) – The Holmes family is one of the richest and most powerful in England. Sherlock spends his time flying around the world on the family’s private jet drinking a lot and shopping at expensive boutiques as a way of trying to alleviate his endless boredom. His mother decides it’s time he settles down with someone powerful, wealthy and well connected. John Watson happens to be none of those things.

The Moonlight and the Frost by CaitlinFairchild (E, 77,289 w. || Case Fic, Post-HLV, Self Harm, Virgin Sherlock, First Time, Oral/Anal/Rimming, Romance, Angst, Mary is Not Nice) – John has to somehow rebuild his life in the wake of Mary’s betrayal and Sherlock’s deceptions.

The Quiet Man by ivyblossom (E, 157,369 w. || Post-TRF, John First POV, Grief/Mourning, Angst, Present Tense, Imaginary Sherlock) – “Do you just carry on talking when I’m away?”

[6onmyshoulder]

wroteuplikethis*

Having watched countless concert compilations on youtube, and having been to The Weeknd’s concert when he touched down in Singapore, I think it’s safe to say that when it comes to hip hop, there is a slight(and I use this carefully) disconnect in the hip hop concert culture, as compared to the crowd’s energy and hype in the US/UK/Canada/Holland etc. The recent A$AP Rocky performance at Marquee seemed to be a testament to that, as the crowd only seemed to know two songs Rocky performed, one of which wasn’t even his own song to begin with...goddamn ‘Plain Jane’.

Some of the performances that have stood out in those compilations have been Playboi Carti’s performances, whenever and wherever.

(Now, I just want to add a disclaimer that I’m not dissing Singapore’s concert crowds. And that I would love to have had the opportunity to fly over and catch my favourite artists live. But my bank account doesn’t let me, which pretty much sucks...)

Carti’s performances seem like the place where you’d...die...lit h a h a. He’s barely singing along to his own song, and seems to spend a large majority of his stage presence hyping the crowd up and screaming 10 of his 1026 ad-libs at any given point. The crowd vibes along, going completely ape-shit.

It’s raw. It’s animalistic. It’s loud. It’s in your face. It’s wild. The fact that Carti fans sing along to his snippets at concerts is amazing to me. A 30 second snippet completely changes the mood of the crowd, sending them into a frenzy, as evidenced by the countless concert recordings of Carti performing ‘Cancun’.

It’s in this raw energetic sphere that Carti absolutely thrives in. And that’s exactly where Carti’ sophomore release, ‘Die Lit’, exists.

‘Die Lit’ has also become kind of a comfort album. I was on a bus at night a while ago, and as usual, I felt this overwhelming urge to listen to ‘So Far Gone’ or ‘Take Care’(2 Drake albums notorious for putting one in their feels). As my thumb hovered over the ‘Drake’ artist arrow, something shifted and I found myself playing ‘Die Lit’. Granted, I was initially feeling kinda sad(what’s new), but ‘Die Lit’ weirdly put me at ease with my emotions. I didn’t think, I didn’t reflect and I didn’t feel, as I’d usually do with those two Drake albums(or other sadboi albums). ‘Die Lit’ allowed me to sink into the beats and Carti’s repetitive hooks that were catchy and easy to listen to.

The album art features a black and white photo of Carti jumping into a mosh pit while flipping people off and it serves as a perfect metaphor for what the album is about. The picture looks brash, unadulterated, insane, chaotic and yet, weirdly poetic, and the album itself, sonically, captures all those.

Die Lit opens with ‘Long Time - Intro’ with Carti talking about how he hasn’t ‘felt like this in a long time,’ while repeatedly ad-libbing in the background(pss, slatt, ooh, pow, pa, yeah). Some really nice synths on the instrumental that sound organic. Carti saying ‘I’d rather get caught with it than without it,’ is the highlight of the track. A fun track that serves as a nice opener to an enjoyable album.

I don’t know how many of you have watched ‘The Matrix: Reloaded’(reloaded is the second movie and it’s trash, so is revelations. only the first movie is fire and worth the watch.) but there’s this underground rave scene where people absolutely lose their minds and party like there’s no tomorrow(i mean they have to seeing as they’re living in a technologically dystopic world). The second track off ‘Die Lit’, ‘R.I.P.’, sounds like it could have been the perfect song to accompany this particular scene. If organised chaos was a song, it would be R.I.P......stripped back production, a slightly overblown bass that has a weird metallic quality to it and Carti’s flow over such a simple instrumental creates such an intense atmosphere, a chaotic one. At certain points, the song is literally just the bass line, one synth and ad-libs, and it somehow, fits into the whole ‘organised chaos’ idea. ‘I’m on demo lit, I’m on migo lit,’ raps Carti. He fits into the track perfectly, and finds the perfect gaps to spit his ad-libs. Him saying that he ‘bought a crib for momma, off that mumbling shit’ begets a sense of awareness of exactly what he brings to the table lyrically.

‘Lean 4 Real’ feels like a mellower ‘R.I.P.’. Slower but just as stripped back, the instrumental has an animalistic quality to it, probably because of the weird background synth that makes it sound like it was recorded in a forest at midnight. Skepta comes in with a reliable verse, countering Carti’s chaotic nature and giving the listener a sense of uniformity with his verse. Carti hops back on and re-hypnotises the listener by repeating ‘I’m on the beans 4 real, i’m on the lean 4 real.’ Simple in its execution, insanely good in its presentation.

Old Money picks up where Lean 4 Real left off, with Carti repeating ‘old money, new hoes,’ then throwing a bunch of ad-libs around, peppering the song with a few more simple rap lines. The bass kicks in with a vengeance through out the song, and Carti’s effortlessness is just put on display for one to enjoy.

Love Hurts(lmao) comes in with a jarringly metallic synth and a hypnotic bass line that just seems into every nook and cranny of your mind, creating a very dark and slightly hellish soundscape. This track genuinely gave me Stockholm Syndrome, as I found myself listening to this insanely jarring song on repeat. ‘Shawty want a rockstarrrrr okay!’ sings Carti, while Travis Scott comes in with a pretty good verse, encapsulating all that’s good with the entire track. His delivery fits the mood of the track perfectly, and the auto tune blends in gorgeously with the grungy vibe of the track.

Lil Uzi Vert and Carti can’t do anything wrong together and in the wake of wokeuplikethis* and left, right, Shoota becomes another song that strengthens their power couple status. Uzi flows on the track even before the beat drops, and once it does drop, Carti picks up where Uzi leaves it on this bouncy and slightly happier sounding track, with the shimmering synth creating an upbeat vibe.

Right Now and Poke It Out are pretty fun to listen to. Bouncy production, Carti’s effortless flows and Pierre’s and Nicki’s features are decent(Pierre’s is actually pretty good not gna lie...would write more but I really just wna focus on my faves).

I like Home(KOD) enough and it’s mainly cause Carti says ‘bring that money home, daddy waiting for it’ over and over and over again...

Fell In Luv’s production is something else man. Really simple lyrics from Carti(i mean did you really expect anything else?). Pierre’s production throughout the album has been special and Fell In Luv is no exception. The vocal sample is such a minor aspect of the song but adds so much character to the beat, and Bryson Tiller’s lofi feature(sounds like he recorded it on his iPhone) actually adds to the aesthetic of the track.

Foreign and Pull Up are pretty decent tracks. Not really my faves and felt a bit ‘filler-ish’.

Mileage has one of the funniest choruses I’ve heard in a while. ‘Molly cyrus, catching bodies, don’t care if your pussy got some mileage mileage....’ Carti dismantling the idea of slut-shaming in one line that’s who I stan uno. Chief Keef’s deeper voice lends a certain gravitas to what feels like a ‘higher pitched’ track cause of Carti’s voice and the production of the beat.

Flatbed Freestyle gives us a good look at baby voice Carti. The beat’s high synth and repeated bass create a repetitiveness that’s unrivalled by the other beats, and Carti literally starts of with ‘BUH BUH BUH BUH BUH BUH’. The beat and Carti compliment each other insanely well, and the track actually ends up being one of the most fun tracks on the entire album. ‘Beeh!’ is my favourite ad-lib after ‘Buh!’ on here. Baby Voice Carti really shines through on this track. He doesn’t sound annoying and doesn’t sound cringe. The Baby Voice is actually...here to save hip hop....

No Time is such an underrated track. Feels like a trap nursery rhyme instrumental, and the sleepy and shimmery xylophone type synth creates an innocent atmosphere as Carti sings about having ‘no time’. Gunna flows over the instrumental like he was born into it. He’s smooth and charismatic, and is perfectly positioned between two Carti verses, forming the perfect palate cleanser within the same song. Definitely one of the better beats on an album already stacked with excellent beats.

I honestly skip middle of the summer...don’t really fuck with it...

Choppa Won’t Miss is an absolute bop in terms of production, and Carti going ‘pew pew pew pew’ in the back is TO DIE FOR. I also just want to ask if anyone can explain the line ‘suck on my dick like a tick’ to me. Thug is pretty good as usual. Flows in and around the beat mans a fucking GOD among men.

R.I.P. Fredo interpolates the R.I.P. beat and sounds amazing sonically. Top is...decent I guess.

Carti created something timeless and fun by sticking to what he knew. Insane production from Pierre and an insane beat selection helped Carti create one of the better albums of 2018(okay i will not play into the 2018 aoty meme).

An album that I enjoyed vastly in 2018, and am still enjoying in 2019, it has snuck into my all time favourite albums list. Carti worked to his strengths and the reception the album received is testament to that. While Playboi Carti may not be for everyone, and especially not for hip hop purists, the effortlessness and simplicity create amazing soundscapes within and across songs. Carti is definitely an acquired taste, and I’m really glad I got into his music.

*^!

[withluvgen]

Letters to Sokovia

(Bucky X reader x Pietro)

Summary: The reader gets a call from her past lover and everything just comes back to her. Based on the Vamps’ new song middle of the night.

Words: 1388

Warning: CRYING. Past wounds. Broken heart. Pietro Fluff! 

A/N: I wrote this to celebrate my birthday honestly. I just wrote it based on my fave band’s new single that came out on the same day. It’s a bit based on a personal experience (well the letter that is...haha) I honestly don’t know why I always write about Bucky as the heart breaker and Pietro as the new love interest.

---two years ago…---

It’s been a year. A year and eight months, to be exact. I’ve been stuck with this feeling for you this long. Now, I’m deciding to stop. Well, I stopped five months ago, but now I’m letting everything go. Deleting you from my life, if that was possible. I was so caught up in this day dream of the two of us being together. Seeing you five months ago in that bar, in our bar, you know the bar we always go to just to get wasted on nights we feel so done with everything. Seeing you there with someone else, some girl you were locking tongues with, just pains me.

Fine, let’s blame it on the alcohol, but what I found out after that night destroyed me. You were with someone else. Someone who wasn’t the girl at the bar. Someone who you’ve been seeing for more than seven months now. It hurts that it’s not me. I honestly thought that we’d have a thing for each other, but it turns out it was only me. I’ve done every effort for you to get to like me back. I literally spent so much on trying to win you, but it turns out money really can’t buy everything. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I told you sooner, or if I never met you, or if I believed everyone who told me not to love you. Too late for that.

It just hurts me that I had to see you there in that bar, on a night that I decided to tell you how I felt about you. I was claiming it to be my night, our night. But I saw you with her. It’s finally time to let you go. What hurts me the most is that I know you’d never see me that way I saw you. By the time you read this, I’d probably be on my way to a different country. I don’t know when I’d be back but I just want you to know that I love you.

~~~

I go over the letter I wrote one more time before leaving it in your room. I finish packing my things and I tell Jarvis to call me a cab. I start walking towards the elevator. How can I be so stupid to let one guy ruin my life like this. To think I’ve got the brains of my dad, Tony Stark. I snap out of my thoughts when I see him, Tony, standing by the elevator and looking as worried as ever. I mean I am his only daughter.

“You sure about this, (y/n)?” He asks. I can see the concern in his eyes.

“Yeah. I need a break from everything. I’d be back as soon as I can. And please keep this a secret from the team. I don’t want them to follow me there. ” I reassure him. And kiss him on the cheek.

“Alright, but no promises.”

“Dad! Don’t tell anyone, okay? Especially-” He cuts you off.

“Barnes and Rogers, I know. Just stay safe, kid. Call me when you need anything, okay?” He says as I enter the elevator and press the button to the lobby.

 ---jump to the present day.----

I keep going back to that moment where it all fell apart. That moment I left. It all went downhill from there.  It’s been two years. I’ve been in Sokovia for two years. I spent all my nights trying to drink my emotions until I can’t feel my heart anymore. Wake up the next morning feeling like shit because of a terrible hangover. Until one morning I wake up in someone else’s apartment.

It was the Maximoff’s. I was so drunk one night that one guy was trying to hook up with me when Pietro just had to save the day. He brought me to his place and let me stay in his sister’s room while she was out of town. From that day on, we became friends and soon enough lovers.

It was one of those nights that I just couldn’t fall asleep. I went out of my shared bedroom with Pietro and went into the living room. I sat there for a while channel surfing, until my phone rang.

“Hey, (y/n)?” It was an unregistered number but a familiar voice. It was Bucky.

“Bucky?” I ask just to be sure

“Yeah, it’s me. I just called to greet you a happy birthday.” I was shocked to hear that from him. He remembered? It was a bit too early here in Sokovia because it was a few minutes until midnight.

“You remembered? T-thanks.” I answered him. There was a long silence between us. “So, I’m just gonna hang up now, okay?”

“WAIT! DON’T” He said. “I…I actually called to tell you that I’m sorry. I have been going through your letter over and over for the past two years and I don’t understand how you slipped through my hands and I did all I can to get you out of my head. But I couldn’t.”

“What? So you call me in the middle of the night for that?” I ask. I was a bit confused about everything. It’s behind me now. I wasn’t expecting this call at all.

“Yeah, stupid I know. But I’m calling you in the middle of the night and I’m choking on my words because I miss you, (y/n)”

“Bucky, it’s been two years. I-“ He cuts me off. He had a habit of not letting me finish talking.

“Baby, don’t tell me I’m out of time because I’ve got so much of my loving to give you. Please, hear me out. Come back to the tower. I miss you.” He said. I could hear his voice cracking. He was crying.

“Buck, I’m sorry. It’s been two years. I’m not your baby. I never was. The day I left, I regretted everything. I spent three months getting wasted all night here in Sokovia. I couldn’t get over you back then, but now that I did I’m not seeing us happening. I love you, I really do, but it’s not in that way anymore.” I start to feel my eyes water. Oh god no. This isn’t happening again. I’m done crying over you.

“I got no explanation to what I put you through. But you know me, managing my expectations is what I never do. I was in love with you from day one. I just fooled around because I thought you weren’t into me. That letter was the only way I found out. I’m sorry. Please…” I was already crying at this point.

“Printessa? What’s wrong?” I turn to see Pietro wiping the sleep off of his eyes.

“N-nothing, Babe. I’m just on the phone with an old friend. Go back to bed, I’ll be there in a while.” I say as I wipe my tears with the sleeve of his hoodie I’m wearing. He walks towards me to kiss my forehead and walks back inside our room.

“Oh. Now I understand why. I’m too late now am I?” Bucky says from the other line.

“Two years too late. If you would have called sooner, there would have been a chance. I’m sorry. I’ve moved on and you should too. I’m in love with the man you just heard earlier. He brought me back to my old self. He was there when I needed him.The way I feel for him was more than what I felt for you.I love him and he loves me back, and it feels much better than before. I’m sorry Buck.” I say as I hung up. I go back inside my bedroom and sit on the edge of the bed. Pietro sits up and wraps his arms around me.

“I heard everything, Printessa. I love you more than you think.” He says as he kisses my forehead again.

“I love you too.” I say as I turn to place a soft kiss on his lips.

“Happy birthday, and when you wake up tomorrow I have a great day planned for you. Just relax and go to sleep now okay?” He says and pulls me to lie down next to him. I place my head on his chest and drift off to sleep.

[jackchambersdarling]

Every single song off shawn mendes’s new album

PREPARE YOURSELF!!

In My Blood

Fave lyrics: I'm overwhelmed and insecure, give me something / I could take to ease my mind slowly…. Help me, it's like the walls are caving in / Sometimes I feel like giving up / No medicine is strong enough / Someone help me / I'm crawling in my skin…. I need somebody now / Someone to help me out

Fave vocal/musical moment: i love the progression of the song and how it just keeps building up with more emotion and stronger/harder music until it just explodes… and the emotion in shawn’s voice (my fave things about his songs usually)

Nervous

Fave lyrics: I saw you on a Sunday in a café/And all you did was look my way/And my heart started to race/And my hands started to shake

Fave vocal/musical moment: his backing OOOHH at 1:37.. It’s just a fun, funky song to groove to and i also really like that you can kinda just feel him smiling when he’s singing y’know (like in that mv.. You can feel that emotion and expression in his voice i feel like)

Lost In Japan

Fave lyrics: I was hoping I could get lost in your paradise / The only thing I'm thinking 'bout is you and I

Fave vocal/musical moment: the way he sings ‘knife’ and his high ‘let’s get lost tonight’s.. his voice is so smooth.. Also how he sings the line at 2:20 and changes it up 👌

Where Were You In The Morning?

Fave lyrics: And I'm looking up at the ceiling / And I keep wondering why… How do you, how do you just walk away

Fave vocal/musical moment: Shawns vocals during the bridge (tbh the only part of the song i like)

Like To Be You

Fave lyrics: I don't know what it's like to be you / I don't know what it's like but I'm dying to…. So tell me what's inside of your head / No matter what you say I won't love you less

Fave vocal/musical moments: the bridge!

Fallin’ All In You

Fave lyrics: Be my summer in a winter day, love

Fave vocal/musical moment: the prechorus (Ooh, you know…) and shawn’s voice in the first line of the last chorus

Particular Taste

Fave lyrics: she'll take your name and number / Then she'll hit erase and walk away

Fave vocal/musical moment: i like the way he sings this whole song in general it’s v interesting… the ‘ooh’ in the prechorus… the humming… i’m obsessed with how he sings (specific, particular)

Why

Fave lyrics: I pretend that / I'm not ready / Why do we put each other through hell? / Why can't we just get over ourselves?.... And every line, every word that I write / You are the muse in the back of my mind…. Don't wanna ask about it 'cause you might brush it off / I'm afraid you think that it means nothing at all

Fave vocal/musical moment: tbh there’s no stand out moments for me in this lol

Because I Had You

Fave lyrics: Thought I knew just what I wanted / I didn't know myself at all

Face vocal/musical moment: again with this one there’s no standouts but i like how they kept the song simple for the most part and it was more about the lyrics and message of the song than a big production

Queen

Fave lyrics: It's hard to believe / You don't remember me at all / Am I hard to recognize? / You say "nice to meet you" every time

Fave vocal/musical moment: how it picks up in the prechorus and the chorus.. It’s just a really fun song that i think is great to listen and dance to… that last chorus with his vocals and the way he changed it up a bit is 👌👌 also

Youth

Fave lyrics: Pain, but I won't let it turn into hate / No, I won't let it change me… You can't take my youth away / This soul of mine will never break / As long as I wake up today

Fave vocal/musical moment: all the backing vocals esp at the beginning and then shawn’s during that last chorus… also i just love how that chorus sounds (lol to me not liking the song the first time i listened to it)

Mutual

Fave lyrics: You say, you want all of me today / But tomorrow's not the same / My feelings never change / What do you want from me?

Fave vocal/musical moment: i love the music throughout the WHOLE ENTIRE SONG… it’s such a jam, just makes you want to move and shawn’s voice on this track is 👌👌 esp on the chorus and the end of the bridge (also tbh i love the way he sing/says reciprocate).. Also his the way he sings the first line of the prechorus god

Perfectly Wrong

Fave lyrics: Taste the poison from your lips / Lately, we're as good as gone

Oh, our love is drunk and it's / Singing me my favorite song… Me and you / We were made to break / I know that's true / But it's much too late… You're perfectly wrong for me / And that's why it's so hard to leave… All the stars in the sky could see / Why you're perfectly wrong for me… There's no use / We were made to break / I know the truth / And it's much too late (the progression of this prechorus pls)... Oh, and why can't I quit / When you break my heart open / I need you more than I know

Fave vocal/musical moment: this is literally one of my FAVORITE songs it’s so beautiful i love everything so that’s why literally almost the whole song is included lmao BUT ANYWAY… the emotion in the second prechorus and how he sings that… the bridge and all that emotion and passion the VOCALS 🙌 also the last 40ish seconds of the song…

When You’re Ready

Fave lyrics: Even ten years from now if you haven't found somebody / I promise, I'll be around / Tell me when you're ready / I'm waitin'... Call you when it's late, and I know that you're in bed / 'Cause I'm three hours back, seems like you're always six ahead… And if I have to, I'll wait forever / Say the word, and I'll change my plans / Yeah, you know that we fit together / I know your heart like the back of my hand

Fave vocal/musical moment: bridge (not a surprise lol) also tbh this song is so sweet pls i get it stuck in my head a lot