#carrot thoughts

[just-a-carrot]

working on a sweet little something because i can't concentrate on anything else today

[carrot-palette]

As a part in a subsystem, I don’t really feel like those parts of me are all that separate. I feel like one unit whole, and each of us is a different color, and that entire whole is one part in a bigger system.

Because I’m still separating what I believed upon formation as a part from the actual facts of my real world and real world mental health info, it’s been really difficult using language that I feel doesn’t sensationalize what I experience.

People turn DID inadvertently into “Alter Disorder” a lot, and I’m prone to doing the same because it feels more comfortable.

I find the differences in myself and the others in the subsystem really interesting, even stuff I’d like to publicly share, but at some point I do need to keep the big collective whole I’m a part of in mind and the recovery that I (collectively) have decided I’m going to pursue.

Sensationalizing DID is really common, and a part of me (maybe based on what I sourced from, maybe just being a kid who needed more care/attention) really wants to show it off and flaunt it like a DID YouTuber. Fuck all the bad bits and just show myself having fun.

I would be lying and stretching the truth though, and I’d be separating myself from the entire big system I’m in. I don’t want to do that.

It feels like I’m constantly fighting against “my nature” to do what’s right, because my perception of did as a part is the sensationalized and fun version online.

I’m not sure if I make sense.

-Carrot 🥕

[fluffyartbl0g]

OMG JUST UNCOVERED: SHORT SEGMENT OF THE ANIMATION MEME I THOUGHT I HAD LOST FOREVER T O T!!!

[minalover]

When Maddie's morning cup of decaf is interrupted by a persistent knocking at the door, she just knows it's Buck. Buck, her beloved baby brother, her pearl of great price, the biggest pain in her ass, having what is, no doubt, another crisis about his love life. Is it Tommy? Is it Eddie? Is it Taylor Goddamn Kelly?

Who knows. Truly.

She slowly pushes away from the kitchen table, forever grateful that her toddler, who would not have slept through this incessant banging, is already at school. Her belly, now at just over eight months, tilts her forward, causing her to waddle like a penguin across her living room and towards the noise.

She grips the handle and starts talking before she even opens the door.

"I told you, Buck, you've just gotta tell him--"

But it isn't Buck.

"Eddie," Maddie says, slightly louder and more shocked than she intended. "It's like, 9:30 in the morning, is everything okay?"

Taking him in, he doesn't look okay. His hair is wild, like he's been running his fingers through it over (and over) and over again. His cheeks are tomato pink and he's almost vibrating.

"Maddie. Hi. Hello. Good morning."

"Good morning, Eddie," she placates, putting on her best toddler-about-to-have-a-tantrum voice. "Would you like some coffee? It's decaf."

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Decaf's good."

He grabs his hair (again), pushes it out of his face (it wasn't in his face), and barrels through the front door and toward the kitchen.

By the time Maddie makes it back there, Eddie's standing and staring blankly at the coffee pot.

"Can you let me just--I'll just sneak in here--"

"I kissed Buck."

Maddie flops down on one of the chairs at the island.

"Okay, you wanna run that by me one more time?"

Eddie flings himself around, luckily catching himself with his hands on the other side of the little table from Maddie.

"I kissed him! He was taking Chris to school, and I walked up to Chris and I grabbed his head, like I do all the time, and kissed him on the top of the head, like I do, all the time, but then I just..."

With the patience of every saint in the communion, she waits for Eddie to finish his sentence.

"I grabbed his head. And I kissed him."

"On the lips?"

"No. On the forehead. He's tall. I keep forgetting."

Maddie takes a loud breath. Not as deep as she'd like, but the oxygen is good. At least that's what Chimney says when he has to deal with buckandeddie at work.

"Okay. And how do you feel about that?"

Somehow, Eddie's cheeks go from tomato pink to pomegranate magenta.

"I don't know, I mean. I. I think Buck will be unbelievably cool about it," Eddie rambles, speed increasing while his oxygen is definitely decreasing. "Like he's cool about everything. Christ, what was I thinking just moving back into his house that I abandoned, oh God, Maddie, does he think I abandoned him? I never wanted to, I never meant to--"

"Woah, there, Eddie, slow down." She's pretty sure that her brother's about to feel some kind of way if Eddie spontaneously combusts in her kitchen.

Eddie's breathing heavy, chest and shoulders cascading up and down with the air he's shoving in and out. His eyes are wide and, if Maddie's not mistaken, there are tears growing in his lash line.

"Eddie?" Maddie questions gently, moving her hand over his, a symbol of support in the echoes of his mind. "I think we might need an answer to that question."

"Which question?"

"How do you feel about it? That you kissed Buck on the forehead?"

She watches as he schools his face into something loud, and then quiet, and then dark. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath. Doesn't open them before he speaks.

"Like I want to kiss him again."

He opens his eyes, big and brown and full of tears. They meet hers, and, by the way his face is swimming in her vision, hers might match.

"Oh, Eddie."

"I know, Maddie," he continues frantically, pushing his free hand in and out of a fist on the table. "I can't ask that of him. I moved back in with him and he's been so unbelievably--"

"Cool," she adds on a laugh. "So you said."

"Maddie," Eddie groans.

"Eddie, Buck has never been cool. Not a day in his life. Especially not about you."

He freezes in his shoes, fist halfway curled open like some sort of claw.

"What do you mean?"

"Eddie. Come on. He's crazy about you. I've known it from the beginning."

His face, wide and open, apparently needs a little more information than that.

"Look, I called his crush on you before he'd even moved out of Abby's house!"

If it's possible, Eddie's mouth is now open wider.

"Maddie... I can't... have this enormous crush on him. Be... in love with him. He's my roommate, and my best friend and I can't lose him. I won't. I refuse."

"Oh," she scoffs, "so you're just gonna swallow this down forever?"

In an instant, Eddie goes smaller than she's ever seen him before. His voice is small too.

"If I have to. He can never know."

"Uh, it's a little late for that," Chimney interrupts from the dining room.

Maddie and Eddie both snap their heads up towards the voice. But instead of Chimney they see, it's--

"Buck?"

Eddie's hand is still in Maddie's, but his voice is now directed to her little brother, standing wide-eyed behind Chimney, shoulders slouched like he used to do when he'd had a bad day at school. She pats his hand and pushes off the table, waddling over to her husband.

"Buck, why don't you and Eddie sit and have some coffee. There's decaf in the pot."

She watches as Buck moves through the room, brushing her across the shoulders as he passes, but eyes never once moving from Eddie.

As she and Chimney back up a little farther into the dining room, she hears her brother's voice.

"Did you mean it?"

"Did I mean what?"

"Well, all of it. Any of it. Did you mean what you told my sister? Did you mean to kiss me this morning before you left the house?"

"Eddie kissed Buck?!" Chimney whispershouts into Maddie's temple, as she brings a hand to his upper arm to slow him down. They're not eavesdropping, no of course not. Just. Enjoying the view from their dining room on a beautiful morning where they each have a few hours together. Of course.

"What if I do?" Eddie starts again.

"What if you do?" Buck questions back.

"Mean it."

"Then I'm gonna need you to kiss me again. And aim a little lower this time, would you?"

Maddie grabs Chimney by the arm and drags him all the way back to their bedroom, lest they bear witness to a secret that's definitely not theirs to tell.

[sweetmeaty]

anatomy doodles from a little while ago

[jaratedeguadalupe]

hc that sniper or scout calls the other over whenever they see animals get up to some mischief

[caterjunes]

[amogus-real-not-clickbait]

part 2 of,,,, whatever this is X]

| 1 | 2 | 3 | ... |

it's not supposed to be very consistent, not rlly a proper comic, but it does work best if viewed all together! im super proud of how the next 2 parts are turning out, can't wait to share with y'all!!

huge thanks again to @crowned-ladybug for writing the carrot soup fics,,,,,, truly a life-changing experience, 1000/10, would recommend

(please lmk if you don't wanna be tagged! i was rlly touched by your reply on my last post and thought that maybe you'd like to see this one as well,, im so glad my little doodles could make ur day better, even if just a bit!!)

i wanted to ramble abt brushes and shapes and colors but im eepy rn and i really wanna post this while i still remember soooo no artist rant today sorry,,,, hope y'all enjoy nevertheless! <33

[bobellafofella]

area city watch captain just really likes his monster girlfriend, more at 8

[bingus-bing-bong]

Once again a man with a face of regret

[tokiwigiwi]

something something kirigiris bisexual awakening via the most evil woman alive etc etc you get it

[just-a-carrot]

this one was so cute.......(◕ㅅ◕✿)

[bumblingbabooshka]

Predation. [Patreon | Commissions]

[ladybugsimblr]

She's here!!!!

[grabby-smitten]

I like how Rafayel is like an onion. He comes with layers and you have to keep peeling and peeling to see what he entails but as you do so, you also start crying and crying.

Then Sylus is a potato. You think u killed him when you buried him in pieces but he comes back thriving. And you know what he is. A potato. It can be used as a weapon in the right circumstances.

[egberts]