does gale know that he's appreciated? does he know that he's loved? does he know that he's funny and witty and charming and worthwhile as a companion because of his simple existence? does he know that there is fulfillment in following the ambition to live? does he know? can he see the paths laid before him, the paths he is destined to walk, some that end in his death, others that continue on with his life, does he understand the ramifications of his choices, does he understand how his choices have affected the other companions' courses just by asking for a hand?
does he understand how the act of taking his hand grounds him in reality, towards a brighter future?
of course he doesn't; he's a fictional character and he only knows thst he sees in front of him and that is his death several feet ahead of him. he is entangled in the fabric of the universe like a moth in a spider's web, the strands of his ambitions and regrets clinging, gossamer thin yet sticky and strong, holding him fast to the paths that rip him in too many directions.
all he needs is a little push into the spider's maw or free to fly and live another day.
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I can't articulate this very well right now but. listen to me. rgu and pmmm, the tv series, are parallel stories. an echo. two versions of the same event. and their respective movies-
adolescence of utena is the happy ending, where the abandoned girl lays down her sword and finally leaves behind her flawed "hero" role so that she may go to the outside world and be with her beloved again. rebellion is the tragedy, where she is unable to let go and takes her old role to its logical conclusion, destroying herself and her relationship with her loved one in the process while convincing herself that she's doing what's best for the girl she loves, even if it means taking away her right to choose for herself.
do you see it. do you understand. there are layers to this !! different takes on the same subject !!! the contrasts also between the main pairs and how they're played !!!!! oh fuck and the deconstructive AU potential is off the chartsssss oh no
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"So I was just asked if there was any point to finishing a fanfic story set in a franchise canon where all hope seems lost. My answer was (by request), private, but this part is universal enough to share:
In private, I will tell you that the hope is the whole point of fanfiction, and that our love shows us these paths to joy for the people we care about. It lets us guide them to a soft place where they can rest. You have the power to help your loved ones rest. I would finish, for that alone.
... and that's not just me being facile. I mean it. Fanfic is the art of looking at a canon and saying "no, thank you," and then taking these toys you love so much-- the ones that are like the skin horse, just a little bit real to you-- and giving them a different story. It may not be a better story to anyone but you, but the power is yours, and it deserves to be used.
Give them their soft places to rest. Or hell, put them through the wringer. But fanfic is where we play with them because we love them, and putting more love into the world is never bad."
- Seanan McGuire, via x
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when laura’s turns become impossibly dog whistle esque rhetorical questions, travis starts his maniacal high pitched laugh, tal starts having the time of his life while also looking as concerned as possible, ashley completely sinks in her chair, and liam becomes the comedic relief that’s when it’s Uh Oh time
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my investment in genshin this time around has been much much shorter lived than expected
this is just a sleep-deprived 5 am rant bc i cannot sleep
i mean, part of it might be spoilers but also the lack of building up to plot that I missed (since my friend played some of the story while using my account as an alt). the issue is that i dont care enough about inazuma’s plot to look it up and see what happened. like ive met ei. i did her second quest. i know enough about raiden shogun to guess. i dont give a single fuck about kujo sara so watching her short-lived fallout from ideology is frankly unappealing. kokomi i liked only bc of a fancomic and the in-game version is much more disappointing. i still forget gorou exists. doing kazuha’s quest is frankly wasting the time i spend alive. i think there’s other characters in inazuma but i keep forgetting who they are so it’s like, whatever
why are itto and shinobu the only two characters from inazuma i actually like???
it is just impossible for me to be invested in inazuma story, and the same issue is happening in sumeru. sumeru the problem is a mix of spoilers but also that i am SO DONE with the traveler having three personality traits
1. i single-handedly saved countries. pay my allies no mind. isn’t it great i owned the jade chamber and that the anemo god is still awol and whatever the fuck went down in inazuma?
2. busybody
3. omg, sUCH a HERo
i really hate it!!!
every time i think im getting invested the focus shifts from characters and their interactions (i thought!!! little sick rich lady and body guard pyro lady and dancer hydro lady had a nice thing going on!!!) back to the traveler and their bullshit quest to go see the dendro archon (for what???? honestly if the writers REALLY cared about the story the motivation would stop being flimsy-ass lets travel teyvat uhuhuh and more ‘that dainsleif fellow is my closest link to finding my awol sibling and if i cannot find my sibling or the god that yeeted us here then by GOLLY i will track dainsleif and other khaen’riah survivors/relics across teyvat until i find one of them again)
(which like!!! could work really well for inazuma and sumeru bc 1. vision stopping might be sus enough for traveler to suspect abyss involvement. but also they got hit really bad by the cataclysm and 2. i havent done the quest yet but there’s a huge-ass ruin guard??? just lying around??? also the irminsul tree links whatnot)
MY POINT IS
i really hate that there’s no motivation to travel around and i hate the boastful traveler and i hate paimon’s screechy voice (i went back to see clips of mond and her voice is SO MUCH LESS SCREECHY) and i really, really fucking despise the grinding
why does every new character need a specific artifact. why do we have to grind so much. if i want to use any of my cast of characters i have to grind the fuck out of them first or they die in three seconds or do nothing. heaven forbid your character scale off anything but attack or hp with how rare things like energy recharge are. like
i thought it was just that i disliked fighting games. im kinda bad at them. and i dont like genshin fighting. i keep wanting to play a ton of rpgs (assasin’s creed, mass effect), but i get tired thinking about fighting. but then i realized, im like 40+ runs in on hades and still going strong. and that game is pure combat.
i just hate games where the combat feels meaningless
at least in hades i know each run brings me slowly closer to escaping the underworld. in genshin after grinding for a full hour (a bit longer than a long slow run in hades) i’ll be lucky if i got anything of use. maybe if you just fight bosses for ascension materials. otherwise get fucked
it just exhausts me and not even puzzles or exploration can make me not feel tired at the idea of playing (And god, i hate the aranara quest run around collecting seeds things.... it could be worse but it could also just be lile. a puzzle instead of dash dash dash con)
anyway i think imma take another break, probably shorter since genshin is what i play when i am bored simply bc its there and easy and i can quit after 5 mins with zero progress lost. a realization brough to you by the realization i was only logging in to get primos for nahida, who i have not met and whom spoilers did not endear me to (also she’s a kid character and except for klee i universally am extremely indifferent to them), whom i was told is “ultra good” for fighting and spiral. and who i’d still have to build up. on the off chance i win 50/50
yeah, no
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