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sooniebby · 3 months

Note

hello, if you still take requests, please hear me out

reader is roommates with a guy. a rather hot guy, to be honest

reader is in denial whenever someone asks if he's attracted to his roommate, but it's obvious he is, he can't take his eyes off him... taking quick looks at his crotch...

anyways, unfortunately the room only has one bed, in which they sleep on together. normally, they sleep each on each side of the bed, but tonight, roommate hugs reader from behind, sleeping spooning

reader won't admit, but he's sooo horny. he just lowers his hand and starts jerking off right there and then, careful not to wake roommate up

little does he know his roommate was just pretending to be asleep and is well sure of what he's doing. now, roommate will show reader what he's made of

would you mind writing something like this?

ఌ 𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐄

W.C › 9.2k

Warnings › this is a random oc. Bottom male reader!!! Changed a few parts of the plot and added kinks since there wasn’t any. Get ready for me using song lyrics, just for a little bit. Anything not translated will be translated at the ending notes. if I have any Korean wrong correct me! I appreciate feedback, I’m not fluent!

Kinks › dubcon, lite somnophilia, dom/sub, manhandling, predator/prey, size difference, blood, possessiveness, dacryphilia

Words to know › 자기야 (jagiya/jagi) means “baby/sweetie”. 선배 (seonbae) title for someone older in school/work. 형 (hyung/hyeong) name for older male from a younger male. 아/야 (a/ya) showing closeness to someone. 동생 (Dongsaeng) little brother/sister, doesn’t have to be a biological sibling/can be a friend.

ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-

❝ 김진우 ❞

Those words were practically all that you heard these days. You know, when you originally came to this university, you had big plans. Plans to date as much as possible. Finally lose your virginity!

But they’re nothing important compared to who you unfortunately got paired to dorm with.

Kim Jinu.

A third year at your university. You felt bitter, to say the least. Of course you would have to unlucky chance of being paired with an upperclassman than another freshman. Gah, you wanted to cry.

Anyone that came up to you was always asking about Mister Kim Jinu! What about you?! You were handsome too!

Well, you were a potato next to Jinu.

The Korean beauty standards just had to pick favorites.

A slow soft sigh left your lips as you stared at your empty screen in front of you. Your fingers twiddled with your pen before you leaned over and pressed it against the screen, attempting to finish the outline of your sketch. You were an art major, dreaming of being an animator or even a comic book artist.

Much to your parents dismay. You haven’t had your mother’s signature kimchi in almost two months now due to your choice. But you tried not to dwell on it! You wanted to be happy.

And if being a starving artist is the only way, so be it!

Speaking of starving….

Your stomach growled as you whined and tossed the pen onto the desk, lying back in your chair as you swirled around. You’d have better luck being a Kpop idol at this point. Maybe it’s not too late. Who doesn’t like a filler member?

You glance in the small circle mirror resting on your desk and probe at your cheeks. Plastic surgery isn’t too much, right? Maybe a slimmer nose? Double eyelids?

“(Name) Oppa..? What are you doing?”

A shriek left your lips as you looked back at Cho Yoona, your classmate. A tight smile pulled on your lips as you took the iced coffee she had in her hands.

“Nothing, nothing. Oppa is just having a mental breakdown.” You said, quickly taking a sip of your coffee to gain some energy back.

Yoona grabbed a chair and pulled it close to your desk, sitting down next to you. “Hm. What are you doing now?”

“Ah? Well, the theme was something out of our comfort zone, so I was trying to create… uh… nude portraits..”

“Huh? Nude? Will Professor Lee Hyunki approve that?”

You shrugged, placing the coffee down onto the desk. “I have a backup plan. I haven’t been able to get in touch with him anyway.” A groan left your throat as you saved your draft before shutting off your computer. “Anyway, let’s go. It’s getting late.”

As you and Yoona packed up, she suddenly looked over to you with a big smirk.

“Oppa… are you… close to Kim Jinu Seonbae?” She asked, looking up at you with wide eyes.

“No.” You quickly said, rolling your eyes. “We’re just roommates. Not close at all.”

“Oh.” She muttered, pouting. “You’re lucky, Oppa. You get to be so close to Jinu Seonbae. Isn’t he handsome up close?” She squealed, clutching her notebook tight against her chest. “I’d die if I get to see him right after he takes a shower!!!”

“Get your mind out of the gutter.” You muttered, playfully flicking her forehead. The two of you left the classroom, turning off the lights and closing the door.

Once Yoona went her own separate way to her own dorms, you couldn’t help but think about what she said. Jinu… in just a towel..?

You heaved as you accidentally swallowed your coffee a bit too fast, pounding at your chest once you finally reached your dorm. Your hands fiddle with your keys while you fight off the harsh coughing burning at your chest. The door swings open as you struggle inside, slamming the door behind you.

Tossing your bag onto your side of the room, you make a beeline for the mini fridge and pull out a water bottle, downing it in seconds. As the cool refreshment calmed the coughing beast within you, you suddenly realized you weren’t holding your coffee anymore.

Your eyes trailed down to see it lying spilled on the floor not too far from your feet.

And unfortunately, it spilled right on a stake of papers near Jinu’s backpack. A shrill girlish scream right of a horror movie leaves your throat as you collapse to your knees and pick up the coffee cup, seeing the damage.

Your fingers felt numb as they slowly peeled the notebook open, seeing the pages stuck together like glue. The once white sheets dark in black, ice cubes coating it like sprinkles. Holy fuck.

Fuck fuck.

Jinu was going to kill you!

With the coffee coating the paper, you could hardly read what was written in it. But judging from the top cover, it looked to be a study guide or something.

Your eyes squinted as you tried to read what you could in hopes of gaging just how bad you fucked up. The words that you could only read were: “바보…토끼…자기…”

What the fuck?

Idiot, rabbit, babe?

What the hell was Jinu writing about?

Jinu was a business major. You couldn’t recall him taking any classes dealing with animals. Maybe it was a code word? Well, all that mattered was that it didn’t seem too important so you quickly grabbed the notebook. Drying it with a hair dryer seemed like your safest bet.

The room door opened, catching your attention as you shoved the notebook behind your back. There stood Jinu, obviously waving bye to someone before finally looking into the room. His eyes zoned in on you, face just frozen for a solid second.

You panicked, thinking that he could possibly see the notebook behind your back. Not the fact you were on your knees, staring up at him with wide cute eyes, and plump lips pulled into a slight pout. Especially with your sweater that was large and baggy, something you preferred, with one of the sleeves down—showing your bare shoulders.

Why would you wear tanks underneath the sweater? The buildings here aren’t that cold.

“Jinu Seonbae..!” You whisper, giggling nervously as you pressed the notebook tight against your back, taking a peek to make sure it didn’t stick out. “How.. was your day?”

Jinu blinked. Once, twice, before a large grin pulled onto his face and his eyes practically closed into those crescent moons girls swooned about. Whatever he was thinking about was long gone.

“I thought I told you to call me hyung, (Name). We’re going to be roommates for a while anyway.” Jinu said, closing the door behind him as he slipped off his shoes and put away his jacket.

You wanted him to stay as far as possible—you couldn’t have him seeing the mess you made! Your eyes trailed around the room, looking for something to distract him with. The floor was feeling sticky from the coffee, its spill coating the floor and now your knees. You didn’t even noticed you had accidentally knelt in the damn puddle.

“H..Hyung! Uhm, can you… get me some napkins?” You yelled, stopping Jinu just as he began to walk past the bathroom door. He balked at your raised voice but simply hummed, turning on his heels to grab some from the connected bathroom.

Your hands gripped the sticky notebook and shoved it underneath one of your old textbooks on your desk, standing up just as Jinu came back.

“Spilled something?”

“Mhm… just some coffee.” You muttered, thanking him for the napkins as you kneeled back down to wipe it up. “I don’t think it got on any of your things.”

Jinu let out a noncommittal hum, standing just inches from you as you bent over. You felt watched—to a strange and uncomfortable amount but you didn’t want to say anything. Once you finished, you glanced up at him, hoping he possibly didn’t notice his missing notebook.

But this position.

No.

No, it was his stare really. You felt yourself squirm, wondering how a guy could look so cute not too long ago and watch you like a hawk the next.

“Ah, (Name), did you eat the sandwich I bought you?” Jinu suddenly asked, his gaze shifting to his desk as he moved past you, sitting down on his chair. “I tried to remember what you liked.”

“Oh uhm. I gave it to my dongsaeng.”

The soft taps on the desk stopped, causing you to look over at Jinu. He was facing the window so you couldn’t get a read on his face. But the total silence made you feel as if what you said was the wrong answer.

“Dongsaeng? Biological?”

“Uhm. Yes. My little brother came to visit me.” You muttered, feeling a bit weirded out he asked that. “He skipped school to see me, but I didn’t have enough money to take him out so I just gave him my lunch. Sorry, Seonbae.”

Jinu’s light tapping on the desk began again as he let out a laugh. “It’s okay! I’ll just make sure to get you two next time.” He turned to face you, a large grin on his lips. Any tension in your body slipped away as you couldn’t help but smile back.

Kim Jinu wasn’t too bad of a roommate.

Just a shame he kept cockblocking you.

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

“Wa, Hyung, these lover letters are all for you?”

On your desk, covering your keyboard and almost the entire space area, was a small mountain of love letters. In your classroom for art major, you all had small little cubicles that was essentially your work station. Unlucky for you, many people found out exactly where yours was to leave gifts.

Oh but not for you.

Are you kidding?

They were all for Jinu.

Your classmate, Im Taeil, reached over and grabbed one of the food that were left, reading the sticky note attached to it. “Oh. This one is for Kim Jinu Seonbae.”

“They’re all for him.” You muttered bitterly, grabbing a heap of them and stomping over to the trash, dumping them with no remorse. Taeil watched you in awe as you cleaned your desk in seconds, leaving just the few snacks.

“Why do they give them to you instead of Jinu Seonbae?” Taeil asked, pulling at the rest of the sticky notes to read what was on them. “Wouldn’t it be easier to just confess to him? Wow, these notes leave nothing to the imagination. I think some of these are from guys too.”

You rolled your eyes, grabbing one of the chocolate bars and pulling it open, taking a big bite. “I don’t know! Maybe they can’t handle rejection. I hope they know I’m not his damn servant!” You plopped down onto your chair and sighed, wanting to just drown in your sorrows.

So much for getting laid or finding a partner.

All that anyone wanted was Kim Jinu!

Agh!! You just wanted to say, “꺼져!” But you knew saying “go to hell” to everyone was a bad idea and would practically send you into the shadow realm of no friends.

Though your only friends seemed to be Taeil and Yoona. But you didn’t really think they liked you as a person. You were just the easiest to talk to.

“Hyung, can I…?” Taeil suddenly whispered, catching your attention. His hands made a grabby motion as he inched close to one of the snacks on your desk. You mutely waved and allowed him to grab whatever he wanted. You’d probably just give the rest to Yoona or something. Ah, maybe your little brother…?

“Oh, Oppa! Taeil!” Yoona greeted, the door pushed open as she carried a bag filled with goods. She skipped over, a bright cheery grin on her lips as she stood right in front of you and Taeil. “Look what Jinu Seonbae gave me! Ah, he’s so cool!”

Taeil peaked into the bag and pulled out a bag of chips. “Wow. He really got these for you?” You couldn’t deny the slight twitch in your lips at his wording. Her? Just for Yoona? No way. No way…

Yoona shook her head. “Not just for me! It’s mainly for (Name) Oppa!” She took out another pair of chips and two sodas, handing one over to Taeil. “The rest is for you! There’s a note inside.”

The bag was practically thrusted onto your lap as Yoona walked over to her desk across from yours and plopped down, eagerly chowing down on her snacks.

Taeil looked curious on what the note said but seemed to know there was limits to his nosy behavior as he sat down at his desk two seats away from you. Huh. Mainly for you?

Weird.

You pulled open the plastic bag and pulled out a soda and chips, similar to what he gave Taeil and Yoona. But there was more: two turkey sandwiches. You pulled out the one that had a sticky note on it, tilting your head as you read his handwriting out to yourself.

❝ 여기, 샌드위치 두 개요. 오직 토끼만을 위한! 아니 동생! ❞

❝ Here, two sandwiches. For Bunny only! No Dongsaeng! ❞

“No dongsaeng?”

You shrieked, looking back to see Taeil suddenly standing behind you. He grinned sheepishly, taking a step back.

“Sorry, Hyung. You got so quiet… I was a bit worried.”

Yoona perked up from her desk, tilting her head. “What does it say?” She walked over and glanced down at the note. “Who’s bunny?”

You shrugged, “not sure. I’ve never been called a bunny before.” You let out another pathetic cry of shock when Yoona and Taeil were suddenly close to your face, eyes wide as if they were examining you like a piece of meat.

“Really? You look more like a deer to me.” Yoona muttered.

“No… I see the bunny. Ah, but maybe hamster too. You have chubby cheeks, Hyung!” Taeil chimed in.

You rolled your eyes, wanting to push them away but you kinda enjoyed the attention. You weren’t really into the whole animal representative thing that a lot of Kpop idols did. Just didn’t see the purpose, especially after you grew up. But you wouldn’t lie and say you didn’t like being referred to as such cute animals.

You could’ve gotten an insect!

The rest of the day was uneventful. You actually ended up eating both sandwiches Jinu gave you, slaving away at your project. It wasn’t going as great as you envisioned—nowhere near. You had no problem creating a nude body it was just difficult to make it… artistically pleasing and not full on horny.

❝ 잠깐만요 시간 있나요?…. ❞

Yoona’s Bluetooth speaker sang the melody of AOA - Excuse me as you stared at the rough draft in front of you. You wished you didn’t pick digital art for this project and stick to traditional but there was no use complaining now.

Your wrist tensed as you zoomed in on the face of your model—creating the soft brush strokes of his hair. Sharp eyes, black in color. The outline of lips that you would paint in pink. Maybe even red. Earrings? No, he doesn’t have any.

He’s gotten bigger. Definitely compared to the pictures you’ve seen of him last year from his friends. Weights..? Boxing? His knuckles looked bruised sometimes when you saw him.

Red, aching. Cuts of skin. Bright and glossy from the ointment he’d put on it. Tanned skin. Red against tanned skin—a perfect contrast.

Does it hurt to move? If you kissed it, would the blood coat your lips?

It was such an edgy thought but you wondered how it’d look to use his blood as lipstick.

His thumb pressed on your bottom lip, slowly smearing it. Would he call you pretty? Kissing you so you both can taste the metallic rush of blood. Maybe you can taste something else. White, maybe?

Your breathing shuddered as your grip on your pen tightened, legs pressing tightly together. Red and white. Would he like you in that? Pretty and pliant just for him to claim. Your free hand gently pulled at your pants, alleviating some pressure against your crotch.

Bunny. Were you his bunny?

Is that what he thought of you? Helpless and defenseless? His fingernails digging into your soft skin as blood spilled, your soft moans teetering on the verge of tears.

What did he remind you of?

A fox?

Don’t they eat bunnies?

You didn’t know why the thought made your whole body spasm. Your breathing getting heavy as the pen began to slip from your hand. He’d chase you. Yeah, that’s what a fox does to their prey. Chase you until couldn’t run anymore, huddled in a dead end as he got closer.

You’d cry and beg but he’d take you. Because he wants you—wants you so bad he can’t control himself. He’d always wanted you beneath him screaming his name for all to hear. As you became his prey.

❝ 벗어날 수 없는 걸 ❞

“Oh! I love this song! Taeil, do you like The Boyz?” Yoona said, turning up the volume. Taeil hummed, looking up from his screen. His eyes looked bloodshot at this point. How long have you guys been here?

“I prefer girl groups. Like Red Velvet!” Taeil said, proudly showing his phone that had a Lock Screen of Seulgi. Yoona cooed and showed her Lock Screen of Kevin. Wow, you’re stuck with Kpop fans. You rubbed your eyes, looking away from your screen to stop seeing the dark spots appearing in your vision.

Taeil and Yoona began talking about their favorite groups while you listened to the song. It felt oddly fitting for the mood you were in right now. You’d have to ask Yoona for the name later. Right now you need a drink, stat.

You grabbed your water bottle and took long gulps as you finally glanced back at your drawing. It took a moment for it to fully register before you let out a scream.

No it was certainly manly.

“Hyung?!”

“Oppa?!”

There—right in front of you—was Kim Jinu staring right back at you. You…

You fucking drew him?!

❝ 온통 너로 물들여질 테니… ❞

No way. No fucking way.

But there it was, staring back at you. His fluffy black hair slicked back as if he was drenched in water. Black eyes with his signature big nose. His lips weren’t pulled into his usual smiles. You had drawn him with all of his features except that damn smile.

Damn Kim Jinu… he was affecting you in ways you didn’t think was possible.

You quickly saved your draft on the tablet and turned it off, needing to just go to your dorm and sleep this daze off. “Yoona… Taeil… I need to sleep.” You muttered, Yoona and Taeil staring at you with worried looks. “You guys should go sleep too. It’s late.”

Yoona and Taeil didn’t fight it. It looked as if they were waiting for you to give them permission. You waved them off, stating you needed to clean up a bit before leaving. Your professor didn’t like crumbs. But you didn’t clean, you just stared at your tablet. The large tablet that the school provided that was now logged on into your account, holding a secret.

Your breathing slowed as you reached over and pressed the power button, waiting as it lit up. The soft taps filled the room as you logged back in and clicked your recent save. He appeared in front of you again.

That fox.

A shudder left you as you pulled down your pants, along with your boxers, as your cock plopped out against your tummy. It was small. Smaller than most. Around 4 inches. Possibly 3 really. But it didn’t matter to you really—you didn’t think you’d ever want to top anyway.

Your hand grasped your cock as you began to pump it slowly, staring straight at the drawing in front of you. His cock. You wondered what it looked like.

You respected his privacy so you never dared to stare at him whenever he came out of the shower.

But you wish you did. Wish you could have an accurate picture of how it would look. How it would be deep inside of you. Would it make a bulge in your stomach?

Is he thick? Long? Maybe both.

You arched your back against the chair as you took shallow breaths, your whimpers filling the empty room. Your toes curled as you whined and mewled, wishing someone else was jerking you off.

Oh who were you kidding?

You wished it was Jinu.

Even as you reached your orgasm, cum coating your tummy, you didn’t feel any relief.

What fun was it if he didn’t chase you?

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

“Jagi….”

A hum left your throat as you buried your face into your arms, shivering slightly from the cool air that tickled your stomach.

“Jagiya.”

Puffs of air brushed against your cheek. It was warm, a nice contrast compared to the cool air that covered you. A finger gently touched your cheek. Poking and doing small circles around the outline of it. The hand trailed down your face to your back, rubbing circles as it started a slight rhythm.

❝ 날 놀리는 거야, 예쁜 자기야. ❞

Despite the taps jolting against your skin, it almost lulled you back into sleep. It was something you missed, the touch of someone special. Slowly, it inched further down, moving to the end of your sweater. Your body flinched at the hand now teasing your skin directly as it grazed it your stomach.

❝ 무방비 토끼. 내가 너를 먹어치울게 ❞

It felt sticky. A deep chuckle reverberated against your back. The touch on your skin was possessive, rubbing and massaging your stomach. Your body flinched as your breathing began to stutter. A hand slipped further down, easily squeezing its way into your pants. The sensual touch—it felt as if you belonged to them and only them.

❝ 도망기면 쫓이갈거야, 토끼야… ❞

A gasp left your lips as your eyes opened, looking around to notice that you were still in the classroom. Fuck. Your body tensed as you moved away from your desk, groaning at the awkward position you slept in. As you stretched, your gaze flickered to an ice coffee on your desk with a sticky note attached to it.

It had a badly drawn bunny on it with a heart next to it. The words: “fighting!” were scribbled beside the crude drawing. You couldn’t help but smile, placing the note on small bulletin board near your desk.

It must’ve been your hyung, Lee Minjae. Or who you affectionately called, Minnie Hyung. He was the one who pushed you to pursue your major instead of what your parents wanted. Such a great hyung.

The whole thing about Jinu felt like a distant memory. You’d have to change what you’re submitting for the project, immediately.

No way in hell were you going to submit a nude of your fucking roommate.

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

There was a something wrong with your bed.

After you took your shower and changed into comfy pajamas, you noticed there was something wrong your bed. Well for one the fucking mattress was missing. You had called Jinu if he knew what happened but all he said was that he found a nest of spider eggs in it so the school confiscated it.

Unlucky for you the school were cheap stakes and it was gonna take a bit of time before you got a new mattress. Jinu had said you would be sharing with him but you didn’t necessarily think you could survive something like that.

Him pressed up against you.

Would it…

You pushed the thought away. Your eyes trailed off to your desk when you suddenly remembered the ruined notebook. You walked over and grabbed it from beneath one of your textbooks, seeing it in its fully ruined glory. There was no salvaging it at this point. You hoped Jinu didn’t care for this dumb thing.

But you were curious to see if you could read it fully now.

You slowly peeled it open and bristled at just how bad the damage was. Half of the pages were stuck together and when you tried to part it they tore. The pen he used to write it had smudged from the liquid so his handwriting was ineligible.

Right before you had given up to just toss it, you came across the last page, seeing a word you could understand. “Jagi.” Huh. Who was this babe of his? You tried to push away the slight bitterness in your throat the thought of that.

Of course he’d have a girlfriend. He was Kim fucking Jinu.

It’d be a shock if he didn’t.

You tossed the notebook into the trash can and made sure to put your food snacks on top of it just in case Jinu decided to accidentally look in there. If Jinu ever asked about his notebook, you’d pretend you never even seen him with a notebook before.

Now all you had to deal with was the problem of sleeping in the same bed with Jinu. You’d survive.

Hopefully.

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

You haven’t survived. It’s been two weeks and it felt as if you hadn’t slept in years. Jinu keeps two pillows between the both you while you slept but somehow the two of you always end up close. It wasn’t even a day ago when you woke up to yourself resting right on Jinu, your cheek pressed against his chest while your hand palmed his neck.

He had a big chest—you wished you had a little bit of a degenerative attitude to feel him up.

But you’d rather not be known as the perverted roommate.

“(Name)-Ah? Something wrong?” A hand gently rests on your shoulder as you glanced up to see Lee Minjae staring down at you. A cute grin pulled on your lips as you placed your pen down to grip one of his hands. You just liked touching him.

“Minnie Hyung! What are you doing in the art department?”

Minjae smirked, leaning down as your noses touch. “Can’t check in on my dongsaeng? Your classmates have been telling me that you’ve been cooped up in here. It’s not good for you to stare at the screen for this long.” You giggled, watching as he pulled away.

“Mhm. I’m okay, promise!” You could feel yourself acting cuter in Minjae’s presence. It wasn’t shocking. He always made you feel safe to act how you do behind closed doors. You could wear whatever you wanted around him without being judged.

A perfect, perfect hyung.

“Ah, Hyung, thank you for the coffee last time! I enjoyed it.”

Minjae hummed. “Coffee? I didn’t bring you coffee.”

“What? You didn’t? Then…” You pulled your lips into a pout as you thought about who would do something like that for you. It couldn’t be Yoona and Taeil. You weren’t close to anyone else.

“Ah, did my pretty dongsaeng finally get a secret admirer?” Minjae grinned, playfully pulling at your cheeks while you whined. The two of you began to giggle like little boys as you stared up at Minjae with a look of pure content.

You hoped you had Minjae with you forever.

A soft knock on the door caught your attention as you and Minjae glanced to the right to see who it was. The position you were in was almost of that of a couple. Your hand grasping Minjae’s as they rest on your shoulders. The previous nose rubbing and even just you looking up at him like he hung up the moon.

Were you two a couple?

❝ 타오른 이 감정은… ❞

Jinu was having a terrible day. First he had to entertain a few random teachers with something he didn’t even care to remember. Second he was bothered by some fourth years about a project they needed help on. And now, he had to deal with Cho Yoona and Im Taeil’s yapping about their favorite song while he walked to your classroom.

That song Yoona was playing just made him angrier. Insanity was the name of the song, at least that’s what she said. Jinu felt the same and thought if he had to see something else that pissed him off he’d die a slow death.

So of course he had to see you, his bunny, making fucking whore eyes to some random seonbae.

What the fuck?!

Jinu forced a tight grin and held up a bag filled with food. Food that was just for you but of course he can’t say that. Despite himself, he tried to keep an easy going and fun attitude when speaking to other people. Though he was wondering if he should forgo that for punting Lee Minjae into the sun.

That stupid pig.

You wouldn’t even look at Jinu, you haven’t been looking at him often these days. He knew it was because you were embarrassed about the sleeping arrangements. But it was the only way he believed you could get closer to him.

So what if he deliberately put a spider and other insects in your mattress in hopes they laid eggs and ruin it so then it would force you to sleep on the same bed with him?

You don’t understand any of his other hints or flirting attempts.

He needed results fast!

You were hopping away to any other dick that wasn’t his and he couldn’t have that.

This chase he was having with you was starting to make him insane. If he didn't have you beneath him soon he wouldn't survive another night with you. His whole plan about having you sleep on his bed honestly felt as if it was back firing on him. You were so cuddly when you slept, always finding a way to move over the pillow barrier.

He always pretended he was asleep when you woke up in a panic, always pulling away before he could truly saver your touch—your warmth.

He was truly going insane. All he could remember was the first time he ever saw you. But he couldn't think about it further when he felt Lee Minjae's hand pat him on the back. Jinu fought every muscle in his face to not immediately grimace at the other's touch.

"(Name)-Ah, Yoona, Taeil, I'll take my leave now. I don't wanna bother you guys any longer." Minjae leaned down towards you and Jinu felt his upper lip twitched as he watched the older with his stupid dyed blonde hair that looked fried and crispy nuzzle his nose against yours.

If that wasn't enough, Minjae wrapped his arms around your neck and held you close as he pressed a wet kiss on your cheek. You shrieked and struggled against his hold, trying to avoid the kiss. But you hardly put up a fight, all giggly and smiley. You looked so small in Minjae's arms, so pliant and easy to hold.

Jinu pulled at his sweatpants, coughing slightly. That seemed to catch Minjae's attention as he stopped his childish assault and gave (Name) a cheeky smirk. Yoona began cooing at how cute you and Minjae looked together.

You didn't. No way. Jinu fought the urge to pull Minjae away from you.

Taeil tilted his head, "Jinu Seonbae, are you okay? Your eyebrows are so furrowed. You might pop a blood vessel."

The others looked over at Jinu, Yoona and Minjae questioning if he was alright, you especially with a look of concern in your doe eyes.

Good.

Worry about him and him alone.

Pay attention to only him.

"It's nothing," Jinu said, puling out his signature lady killer smile. "I think I just need to eat something, I haven't had a proper lunch in ages." Yoona immediately swooned while Taeil rolled his eyes. Minjae seemed in deep though as he stared at Jinu, the fourth year tilting his head as if he was digging deep into Jinu's soul. Figuring him out with a just a look.

Minjae grinned. "Let your seonbae take you out, yeah?" He suddenly said, catching everyone's attention. "I know a place not too far from here that sells great tteokbokki."

Like I'd want to be caught dead with you... Jinu thought to himself but he simply hummed. "Sure, Seonbae. Bye, Yoona, Taeil..."

Jinu stared right at you as Minjae pulled away from you. Your eyes flickered over to Jinu and you offered him a tight smile, waving slightly. "See you, Jinu Seonbae."

"See you, (Name)." He whispered, mostly just happy you even looked him in the eye.

But his happiness was short lived when you looked at Minjae and offered him a cute smile. A smile that you’ve never gave him. "Bye, Minnie Hyung!"

Minnie Hyung?!

Jinu followed Minjae out of the classroom, curses swirling in his mind as he stared at the man beside him. Minjae chuckled after a moment or so and looked over at Jinu with a smirk. "Y'know, you can't blow my head off with just your stare. I didn't know you were into my (Name)-Ah."

His? Jinu was fine with being expelled at this point but Minjae suddenly stopped in his tracks. "Jinu-Ya," he placed his hand on Jinu's shoulder while Jinu wondered what gave the man the audacity to use such a title with him. "If you want (Name)-Ah, you have to take him. There's so many wolves that want him." He smirked knowingly, his finger tapping Jinu's shoulder.

Just as Jinu was about to speak, Minjae pressed his finger on his lips. What the fuck? "Listen to your hyung, Jinu-Ya. With someone so naive like (Name)-Ah, you just take him like you own him. Chase after him, there is a dead end soon."

With that, he pulled away and smirked. "Tell me how the chase goes. I've been waiting for someone to snatch up my dongsaeng."

Jinu just stood there blank faced in the middle of the hallway as Minjae walked away. Just what the fuck was that? He didn't even think too hard about it when he realized he didn't have to worry about you and Minjae. Phew, that stress was short lived.

But what did he mean by dead end?

ཆི❤︎ཆྀ

You were going insane.

It felt you were being watched these days. You had finally finished your project, having going with another idea and completely abandoning the whole nude thing. But it still sat in your drafts, practically calling you everyday. Sometimes you'd go back...

You'd finish certain parts of it. His body fully detailed expect that dreaded crotch. His dick. You wouldn't dare make what you believed his dick to look like. There was still some sense of self respect deep inside you.

Just not strong enough to not pay attention when you were drawing something for fun. You had a art account that you posted on like once every month of gay art you drew. So you were creating the piece, feeling in the mood to do something with oral fixation.

Only for you to notice instead of the usual two same characters you stuck to, it was Jinu as the top. Which, fair, it wouldn't be too different from what you had literally done weeks ago.

No, the problem was the partner.

You drew yourself.

You fucking drew yourself.

The drawing felt so real compared to the others you've made. Drawing Jinu between your legs, holding you up, bending you over on the bed. Your shoulders rest on the bed while your legs curled into yourself. His mouth biting the flesh of your ass, his eyes staring right at you, the real you.

Of course you had to angle it this way. Fucking pervert.

You tried to salvage the drawing but each stroke on that cursed tablet just made the partner look more and more like you. Okay, you were desperate for sex at this point. It was too much. You pressed the delete button on the sketch and powered off the tablet.

"I'm going, Taeil. Don't stay too late."

With lighting speed, you rushed to your dorm, trying to ignore the growing boner in your pants. Why did you have to like someone like Jinu? Out of all the people at this stupid university. Even Minjae would've been better than Kim Jinu of all people. But you couldn't complain any further because when you stormed into your dorm, fucking Kim Jinu was there, sitting at his desk.

Jinu glanced over at you and grinned, taking off his glasses as he shut off his laptop. "You're back earlier than normal. Did you end up finishing quick?"

You numbly nodded. "Yes... I just need to sleep. My eyes hurt." You couldn't even look at him. His gaze followed you as you grabbed your pajamas. Wherever you stepped, eyes were right on you, watching you like a predator does his next prey.

Bunny and fox.

That's what you imagined him as.

A fox.

It felt so hard to breathe with him near.

Why did it feel like there was no escape?

❝ 지금 너를 미치도록 ❞

The soft sputtering of the fan filled the room as you laid there right awake on Jinu's bed, wondering why you couldn't sleep despite your tired eyes. Jinu was fast asleep, his back pressed your own back. You didn't know why the usual barrier wasn't here tonight but you couldn't care too much about it right now. Not with your growing boner.

You haven't masturbated in two weeks. It's not a shock that the stupid art from earlier was still affecting you like this. You wondered if you could just sneak into the bathroom and quickly jerk one off. Would he notice? Just as you made the decision to get up, strong arms suddenly wrapped around your waist. Your body stiffened as you felt Jinu snuggled against your back.

His face buried in your neck, his nose and bangs softly tickling you.

What...the...fuck?!

Your legs subconsciously clamped shut at him so close. Okay, you were fucking screwed. The thought of moving seemed impossible now with him so close. His grip was so strong that you didn't understand how someone asleep could have such strong coordination.

Despite being cuddled by your crush, your cock was more alive than ever, leaking against your pajama pants. You let out a stifled whimper as you reached down and gently rub the bottom of your palm against your bulge. The relief was almost instant as a guttural groan escaped you before you could stop yourself.

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Were you really going to do this?

Yeah.

Yeah you were.

Soon the fan wasn't the only one making noise. Your soft and breathy moans filled the room as you jerked off. Your body flinched from the pressure causing your butt to rub against Jinu's front.

Wait.

He was... hard...?

A wave of fear washed over you as you stilled your hand. No, no. He must be having a wet dream or something. Yeah, he can't be awake hearing you. No. No way. You needed to reach your damned orgasm and just go to sleep. You'd deal with the shame in the morning. You finally decided to pull down your pajama pants to grasp your cock and not just rub it anymore.

You pumped your cock, making sure to still your body so you don't accidentally rub your bare ass against Jinu's clothed crotch. He'd hate that. No, he'd hate to learn what you're doing. Fuck. The shame was already affecting you. Stray tears fell down your cheeks as you bit down at your pillow, still chasing your orgasm despite the shame filling your lungs.

Embarrassment. This was so fucking embarrassing.

It was close-- your orgasm. Inches away, dancing on the tip of your fingers as your moans began to reach a crescendo. So much for muffling yourself. Your edge to your orgasm was wrecking you—sending you to a mental space you couldn't imagine in any other circumstance.

Was this how sex with someone you liked felt?

Could Jinu make you feel this way?

Was... him being here making you this way?

It wasn't enough. You wanted more. Your legs shifted as you subtly pulled your pants down, kicking them off without a care. You didn't have any lube but you had no time. The tease of ecstasy was whispering your name—calling you to go further. So you did. You suckled two of your fingers, getting them as wet as possible before slipping down between your legs.

The two seconds of pain as you pushed them inside did not deter you. You could deal with a little pain. It was rough. Your fingers rubbed against your inner walls, searching for those bundle of nerves to drive you wild. But it was difficult in this position. You usually masturbated on your back or while sitting up.

You wondered if you should go as far as to shift positions. That'd be too much, right?

The shame was finally catching up to you. You couldn't do this. This disgusting and degrading action towards both you and Jinu. Your eyes closed as you sighed, eyes fluttering shut. It was too much.

"You're done already, (Name)-Ah?"

A chill crept up your spine as those three words were whispered right into your ear. Your eyes widen but you couldn't move. It was as if his words just took out any sort of life within you. His arms around your waist tightens as you feel him nuzzle himself further on your neck.

Your breathing feels erratic. You can't breathe. It feels as if you'd die right here, right now.

You looked down to see his hands. They looked recently bruised from his usual boxing. But now they felt different. As if it was a show at just how durable his body was. His arms slowly began to tighten around you only to you let out a sharp cry at the pain, earning a pleased grunt.

"You're awake, yeah? Are you ignoring hyung?" He whispered, his lips trailed your neck, stopping right at the tip of your air. "You can masturbate right beside me but can't even answer me?"

A pathetic whine left your throat as you tried to wiggle from his grip but it proved to be futile. You gasped, arching your back as you felt Jinu rub his crotch right against your butt. He began to hump you ignoring your shocked gasp.

Was he...?

"So selfish, bunny. Chasing your own release. Not even thinking about what your moans were doing to me." His right hand trailed down and pushed you to lay on your front, his body following to lay on top.

You cried out, gripping the bedsheets like a life line. "You.. were awake...?"

"I never went to sleep." He said honestly, spanking you right on your ass. You squeaked, back arching to get away from another spank. "I never knew you would do something like this. I was beginning to think you hated me."

"I never—”

"—but you never listen to me, do you? I tell you everyday to call me hyung but you never let it stick. What, do I have to force you to say it?"

"We aren't close!" You whined, whimpering at another spank. Your lower hips wiggled but you didn't make any effort to truly push Jinu off of you. You didn't understand yourself sometimes.

"What? But you call Lee Minjae hyung without any problem." Jinu grunted, his hand reaching over to grab something from the slim nightstand next to the bed. You couldn't tell what he grabbed until something cool and slimy was drizzled onto your ass. A whine left you from the coldness. "What'd he do? Fuck you? Chase you like you so desperately want?"

"Nooo," you whined, screaming when he shoved in two fingers inside your hole. Your hands dug into the bedsheets as he thrusted his fingers in and out, a constant rhythm with no sign of stopping despite your pleas for him to slow down.

Jinu chuckled, leaning down as he used his free hand to push your hair away from your face. "You act so innocent but you want this. I'll show you that I'm the only one for you. No other man can chase you like I can."

"What... ngh!!! are you talking... about..?" You manage to ask, wishing you could silence yourself. Your neighbors will certainly be having a long talk with you and Jinu tomorrow.

"Oh, bunny. My bunny, you really are so naive." Jinu whispered, pressing a kiss on your cheek. "You don't even know what you crave. It's okay, hyung will take care of you now. You won't ever have to think again."

Your body began to spasm as you felt a finger graze that bundle you tried to reach earlier. Jinu stilled for a moment, a look of slight worry in his eyes before he noticed what had just happened. A cruel smirk pulled on his eyes formed those crescent moons you once associated with his innocence.

But it didn't bring any sort of serenity to your body.

You were flipped onto your back with ease as Jinu grabbed your thighs and pushed them forward, effectively blocking your view from him. Desperate and pained moans left your lips as he continued to finger you, fingers gunning consistently at your prostate.

A loud scream left your throat as your back arched against the bed, your cock finally releasing the weeks long pent up lust you've stored for awhile now. Your stomach slowly rose and fall, coated in your sticky cum. All you could think about was your orgasm back in the classroom.

You were right.

Jinu made you cum harder than you could ever do by yourself.

You expected him to pull away but instead you felt a tug on your cock. A whine of overstimulation left your throat as you parted your legs and looked at him with wide doe eyes, confusion written all over your face.

A cruel smirk pulled on his lips as he tilted his head. "I've wanted you since I first saw you. You really think I'll let our first time be so lackluster?"

Lackluster?

He thought that was lackluster?

A pained cry left your lips as he began to thrust his fingers inside once more, leaving no sympathy as he immediately went for your prostate. You were going to die. You were going to die being fingered by your roommate. Kim Jinu was going to be the death of you.

It didn't take long for you to cum again and again, your fifth orgasm not even releasing anything. Your body twitched as your eyes watered, tears streaming down your face from the constant overstimulation. You weakly pulled your legs away from Jinu's grip after your fifth orgasm, muttering something about dying from his touch.

Jinu chuckled, allowing you to pull away. "Ah, Jagi," he whispered, causing you to blush at the title. To use such a term for you... You shamelessly felt your spent cock twitch. No, no, no! You absolutely couldn't do anymore. "You're so cute. I wanted to wait but I can't. You'll forgive me, right?"

You watched with wide eyes as he grabbed your waist and pulled you down towards him, earning a shriek from you. Your legs moved up to hide your aching and loosened hole but he was quick, spreading them wide. His eyes were like a predator, watching your every move as you tried pulling down your shirt to cover your weeping cock.

"Seon—Hyung... No more... No more, please." You whispered, looking up at him with pleading eyes.

Jinu's gaze narrowed in on your face. You could see him think. Your body was aching and praying Jinu did what you asked. But your heart....

Your heart wanted him to take you without a second thought.

"Hm. No." Jinu laughed cruelly, flipping you to rest on your knees. You cried out at the sudden movement but could only whimper as he pushed your back down, lifting up your hips. Your face pushed into the bed while your thoughts rushed at the position. It felt so humaliting to have sex without looking him the eye. You felt like an object. A prize he just won.

Your dick twitched.

So much for self respect.

"Hyung's gonna take good care of you." Jinu whispered, spreading your ass apart as he rubbed his cock between the cheeks. "You'll be good for hyung, mhm? No more seonbae."

You only whined, wiggling your hips, your ass rubbing Jinu's cock.

Jinu teasingly slapped your ass. "You complain about it being too much... But look at you now, begging for my cock. I should just stop listening to what you say and take what I want. Would you stop me, (Name)-Ah? Would you run away?"

Run away?

Run away from the man you've had wet dreams about since you came to this damn university?

"Mhm. I'll run..." You whispered, a strangled moan leaving you as he began to push his cock inside of you. The stretch was difficult and you briefly wondered if this was how you'd die.

Heart attack from a thick cock.

Despite your answer, Jinu hummed. "Good. I'll chase you until you're beneath me, shaking in fear as I take you." His hands gripped your waist as he slammed the rest of his cock inside, earning a gargled cry and scream from you.

Jinu was anything but sweet. Fucking you like a beast as you withered and cried from the constant pressure against your prostate. After this, you weren't sure you'd have sex again. This could be enough for a life time.

"Sorry, (Name)-Ah. I can't last long." Jinu suddenly grunted, pulling out. You whined at the lost but didn't have to mourn it for long as he pulled you onto his lap, making you face him. Your arms subconsiously wrapped around his neck as he easily slid back into your tight heat, gripping your thighs as he bounced you on his cock.

Jinu smirked, his eyes trained right on you. "You look so pretty when you cry." He said, pressing soft kisses on your neck. "Next time, you'll be crying from just my cock. I'll make you scream my name."

You whimpered, arching your back as you pulled him closer, another dry orgasm creeping on you. You'd be sleeping well for nights to come. Jinu grunted as he began to thrust upwards into you in tandem with bouncing you up and down, causing you to cry at the sudden pressure. You were close. So close.

A sharp feeling in your shoulder caused you to spasm as Jinu's thrusts became desperate. It took you a moment to even think about what just happened--so focused on Jinu's cock stretching you out. Until you noticed red dripping down your right shoulder.

He bit you.

The delayed reaction to the bite made you scream out, tears streaming down your face you reached your six orgasm of the night. You went limp in his arms, just letting him chase his own orgasm. Teeth sharp enough to break skin wasn't something you ever imagined Jinu could do. But there it was, a rare and sore bite on your right shoulder. Blood slowly trickling down to your chest.

Jinu finally reached his orgasm after a minute or so, holding you close as he cummed deep inside. You shuddered, feeling his cum coat your sore tight heat. He didn't wear a condom. If you weren't fucked dumb you would've yelled at him about it but all you could do was hum as he pressed soft kisses against your wet and sweaty skin.

You glanced down and noticed blood coating the bottom of Jinu's lip as he pulled away from you.

He did end up coating you in red and white.

But your blood was the lipstick. You couldn't help but laugh at your cringy thought, groaning as Jinu pulled his cock out.

"You did so good, (Name)-Ah." Jinu whispered, kissing you on the lips. You tried to return the kiss but could only purse your lips against his.

Your breathing was harsh and quick, your body battered from Jinu's claiming.

This wasn't normal. Wasn't conventional at all. You were sure that if you told Yoona and Taeil about this they'd be worried for your safety.

You were prey to Jinu

But you were okay with that.

❝ 숨을 쉴 수 없게 아프면서 황홀하잖아 ❞

"You're going to roommate with a first year? Wow, good luck!"

"I didn't know they could do that."

"No one would willingly room with a first year. They're the worst."

"Aw, c'mon, Oppa! They're usually just nervous."

"Well, our Kim Jinu will have no problem. Who doesn't love him?"

"Ah, true. Good luck, Jinu!"

Kim Jinu pulled out his keys, unlocking the door to his new home for the rest of the school year. He'd be the one to get unlucky for his previously planned roommate to drop out of school—leaving his room open for a late transfer freshman. He didn't want to deal with first years, they were annoying.

He opened the door, shocked to see the room already having someone by one of the beds. The first year was knelt beside the bed, looking through the suitcase that was filled to the brim with clothes. Clothing that looked more feminine than anything but Jinu didn't judge.

He forced his usual carefree smile, ready to greet his new roommate when you finally turned around. His breathing stopped—his smile dropping at the sight of you. You... You were different from anything he imagined.

Your look of innocence. Your body suddenly becoming fidegty the longer he stared at you without saying a word. Your sweater drooping on your shoulder, showing off your bare shoulder. Your skin looked so soft, so plain. It needed something on it.

It looked too bare.

"I'm... Kim Jinu. Who are you?"

"Park (Name)." You whispered, your eyes flickering up and down his body.

Love at first sight wasn't real to Jinu. He wouldn't lie and say he felt love towards you when he first saw you.

He felt lust.

An urge to completely ruin you.

And by the look in your eyes, the not so subtle glances at his lower half of his body. You looked to be such an easy catch.

"Stop looking at me like that." You suddenly said, your lips turning into a slight snarl but it hardly held any weight. Jinu couldn't help but tilt his head. He could tell you wanted him but you were holding back?

Actively pushing him away as if you didn't look at him with the same lust he felt. Running away?

Like a game of cat and mouse.

No...

Fox and Bunny.

He was going to devour you.

Even if he had to chase you.

❝ 네게 빠진 순간 더는 결백하지 않은 나 ❞

ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ-

WOW!!! Gosh, this was way longer than it needed to be. I wanted to try something new lmao. Doubt i'd do it again, i was listening to kpop while writing this so it kinda just happened. Translations at the bottom! Yes, i did it for a reason, made it more fun if you didn't know what he was saying. Red is lyrics, pink are jinu’s words

I might make him an oc, i put too much effort into him for it to be a one time thing, smh... primal play is so fun.

tag list: @iwishtobeacrow @flurrina @chill-guy-but-cooler @mello-life25 @the-ultimate-librarian @kiiyoooo @ofclyde @love-kha1 @star-3214 @mooncarvers-world @smellwell @tehyunnie @remdayz @rhetorical-conscience @tomoeroi

Translations:

❝ 벗어날 수 없는 걸 ❞ — I can’t escape

❝ 온통 너로 물들여질 테니… ❞ — everything will be colored with you

❝ 날 놀리는 거야, 예쁜 자기야. ❞ — you’re teasing me, pretty baby

❝ 무방비 토끼. 내가 너를 먹어치울게 ❞ — defenseless bunny. I’ll eat you up

❝ 도망기면 쫓이갈거야, 토끼야… ❞ — if you run away, I’ll chase you , bunny

❝ 타오른 이 감정은… ❞ — this burning feeling

❝ 지금 너를 미치도록 ❞ — i'm driving you crazy right now

❝ 숨을 쉴 수 없게 아프면서 황홀하잖아 ❞ — it hurts so much that i can't breathe, but it's ecstatic

❝ 네게 빠진 순간 더는 결백하지 않은 나 ❞ — the moment i fell for you, i was no longer innocent

Songs used: Insanity - The Boyz & Criminal - Taemin

#bottom male reader #x male reader #sub male reader #uke male reader #male reader #mlm ns/fw #male bottom reader #oc x male reader #oc x reader #smut drabble #x male smut #original character #mlm nsft

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market-180 · 2 years

Text

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#coffee slimmer pro #wieghtloss #loss weight

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alley-cc · 17 days

Text

John Price x Plus size reader

Note: F!Reader ------ MDNI 18+

He hears you before he sees you. "My date left. Mum he just saw me then walked away." you murmur. You sit at the table beside his, nursing an iced coffee with one hand and a phone to your ear with the other.

A soft girl, the prettiest thing he's seen all day. No. All year - maybe longer. He can see you're doing your best to hold back tears, eyes red rimmed and quiet sniffles masked under the sound of the busy cafe. Your arms tucked around your round beautiful body. Hair tied in a half up, half down style with some strands pulled out to frame your face. Probably because you felt it made your round face look slimmer.

John keeps to himself for the moment, quietly eavesdropping on your phone call. He'd only been back from deployment for a week and he was itching to lure a pretty lady like yourself into his sheets. He's got four weeks of leave and he's damn well sure your his new mission for that allocated time - maybe longer if he can help it.

It's been months since he had a pretty girl in his hands. Someone he could really hold onto. A body built to be loved and worshipped. God, what he would do to have you. To kiss every inch of your skin, show you how much you deserve love and adoration. His eyes discreetly wander over your perfect shape. The way your gorgeous tits slightly spill out of the low-cut blouse. The way your high waisted jeans dig into you. Your wide beautiful ass that struggles to be contained by the shitty plastic chairs that seem the creak under the smallest movement.

"I'll just settle for being alone. " you huff. Price won't settle for that. No. No. No. He can't stand the idea of you wallowing in your own sorrow. All of this self doubt over an asshole who is obviously blind. He has half a mind to call the team and hunt the muppet down - have him apologise on his hands and knees to you. Embarrass the prick like he obviously embarrassed you. Oh, the things he would do to see you smile.

So, he waits. It doesn't take long for your phone call to end and him to strike. Getting up from his table and taking a short walk over to yours.

"How about I treat you to a real date?" He asks.

____________________________________________________________

It's been a looooonnng time since I've written fan fiction so don't mind the crusty dusty grammar. Hope you enjoyed and remember to stay slay and drink water you gorgeous souls. Mwah xoxo

#john price x reader #john price #cod #cod mwii #cod mw3 #cod modern warfare #captain price x reader #captain john price x reader #price x reader #price fluff

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11rosebunny · 5 months

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What does he smell like? (BOFURIN + SHISHITOREN)

Haruka Sakura

Something that smells like peppermint and clothing that got out of the dryer seconds ago. No one knows how he is able to maintain that clean smell throughout the entire day.

Even when he is sweaty, you could still get a scent of a minty burn to the nose.

Hajime Umemiya

An earthy, citrus smell. Because he spends most of his time gardening, he tends to have the aroma of leafy greens after a long day outside in the sun.

However, if it's his day off and he decides to just stay home or prance around town at the different stores, he has a tendency of putting on a deep lavender cologne.

Toma Hiragi

A warm vanilla spice.

He likes to take care of himself and has a very small collection of colognes with similar smells. His go to is a slimmer scent of a spicy aroma, the strange part is, he naturally smells like a warm vanilla. So when his perfume mixes with his actual scent, it's a pretty good combo.

Taiga Tsugeura

A woody, caramel smell. He's always working out, even during school hours. His body has trained itself to not sweat as much but even so, he still manages to catch some musk in his body. It's not too bad to the point where he smells like a stinky cat, but it's noticeable if you lean in close to him.

If he's just showered or is having a day off, he still has that same woody smell but with the slightest hint of roses.

Mitsuki Kiryu

A floral, clean smell, almost like if you stepped inside an extremely clean washroom and someone had just sprayed a flower scent. Coming from the way he takes care of himself, he deeply cares about the way he smells.

He doesn't own any cologne but has 1 or 2 body mist sprays of a gentle floral smell.

Hayato Suo

Pumpkins and black coffee. Oddly enough, the combo of those two things smells extremely musky and handsome. Some of his fragrances he owns have a more kick to the nose, while his natural aroma smells like pumpkins.

The bitter smell of black coffee purely comes from the different teas in his house, but because of how overpowering the scent of black coffee is, it sticks onto his clothing.

Jo Togame

Extremely spicy and aromatic. He grew up using Axe at an early age, so he grew accustomed to the smell of. He doesn't exactly mind trying different fragments, it's just that he couldn't be bothered to look for new ones. He'd rather keep it plain and simple.

If you do complain to him or tell him you like the smell of something else, only then he will browse around to match the same description you gave him.

Tomiyama Choji

An orangey, chocolate smell (?). The two fragrances are very different but he somehow smells like that.

He doesn't even own any hair products that may have those types of smells, his hair is naturally frizzy like that. It mostly comes from his diet I would say.

He's known to have a taste for sweet drinks and mainly eat chocolate treats.

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iwantoseemybonesss · 10 months

Text

wl tips and tricks

1. spend your calories on healthy food obviously and eat enough Protein

2. cold showers are so good

3. Water, Water and Water!!! Drink a lot of water (cold)

4. Drink very warm water in the morning on an empty stomach this helps you with digestion and you can easily go to the toilet

5. Never drink your calories thats such a waste! If you‘re bored of Water, drink black coffee or sugar free tea

6. SLEEP! You burn a lot of calories while sleeping! if you don't sleep enough and and you're awake all night it doesn’t do anything

7. I recommend eating under 1000 calories a day! See what works best for you without binge eating afterwards! (I eat max. 400cals a day)

8. Don't weigh yourself too often as your weight will fluctuate throughout the day and this will make you less motivated. 1-2 times a day is enough. In the morning on an empty stomach and after you finished being on the toilet

9. walking!! Walk a lot!

10. Jogging or Running.

11. Eat slowly for better digestion and you don't bloat before eating drink water!!

12. Less carbohydrates more proteins! and vitamin!!!!!

13. Always weigh your food! Without knowing how much you've eaten, you don't know how many calories you've consumed

14. Don't tell anyone and surprise them with your you‘re new body!! Don‘t look for thinspo be the thinspo

15. buy clothes that make you look slimmer and emphasize your figure

16. Always stand up straight and elegantly as this will make you look purer, slimmer and more beautiful

17. don't disappoint Ana, she just want the best for you so listen to her

18. take before and after pictures to follow and realize your progress

19. zero drinks can cause your fat burning to stop and it is also unhealthy

20. Help a lot around the house (cleaning, tidying up,...) burns extra calories

21. Distract yourself from eating, be active and don't have time for eating! such as learning, drawing, playing, napping, ...

22. If you really want to eat something but don't allow yourself to, you can chew it and spit it out (you still swallow very few calories but not all of them!) its better than puking!!!

23. Cold burns calories but don't go out dressed too thin as you'll get sick more quickly than others

24. save calories! For example, if you want to eat toast, you can cut a slice in half into thin slices so you have a lid and a base made from one slice

25. always looking for excuses such as: I've already eaten, I'm going out to eat with friends, I have a stomach ache and the classic: I'm not hungry

26. buy clothes that are a size or 2 small so you are more motivated

#ana meal #tw disordered eating #ana bllog #thinspø #ana trigger #tw ed diet #tw ana diary #ed not ed sheeran #thin$po #ed not sheeren

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kyracooneyx23 · 4 months

Note

can you please do an r x kcc where r and kyra are like best friends but then r does her acl and then they don't see each other for ages and in the time they don't spend together kyra starts to realise that she feels somethinf for r and then when r comes back to camp kyra starts acting differently and then r finds out or something along the lines of that sorry if thats too confusing

Missed You More - Kyra Cooney-Cross

kyra cooney-cross x matildas!reader

summary: Your back in camp after a long ACL recovery but your best friend kyra's acting strange. warnings: injury, kind of angst ig? not really anything else except terrible writing, its just a lot of yapping

'Chelsea winger Y/N L/N has just collapsed and is holding her knee, she looks to be in a lot of pain. A stretcher is being brought on to the pitch for her now showing that this isn't a minor injury. Could she have done her ACL? If so that would not be good for her hopes of playing in the upcoming world cup on home soil for the Australian.'

Scans confirm the worse for Matildas and Chelsea star, Y/N L/N, as it has been revealed the young forward has ruptured her anterior cruciate ligament in recent game against Leicester City. Her hopes to play in the world cup next year very slight as she begins her long road to recovery.

The image of her best friend falling to the ground still haunts Kyra even now 5 months later as she sat on the bus heading to their camp in England after their disappointing loss to Scotland two days ago ending their 7 match winning streak. It was the final camp before they headed home to Australia to prep for the upcoming world cup on home soil. The words of the commentator still replay in her head constantly reminding her of the heartache she felt for her best friend. In every news article she read their was always something about how the matildas star forward, chances of making the squad for the world cup were getting slimmer as time passed, it had consumed all her social media. Her constantly reminding her of the moment you had called her after your scans tears streaming down your face as you broke the news to your best friend about the results.

Of anyone in the world, Kyra knew better than anyone just how much it meant to you to be representing your country in a world cup on home soil, you had left home and travelled halfway across the globe to play for Chelsea at only 16, giving up most of your teenage years to be the best player you could. It broke her heart to just imagine how you would be feeling during this time.

In the thousands of facetimes they'd had together you had always tried to stay positive, always laughing at something and sharing stories about your time in England. But Kyra could see through the facade, nothing would get past her, you'd been best friends since you were fifteen when you both played for Melbourne Victory together. She knew how hard it was for you, you didn't have any family with you and Kyra hadn't been able to visit you as her season with Hammarby had been to busy to have enough time of to sneak in a trip to London.

Since you had been out injured, Kyra's mood had been very down. All her matildas teammates had noticed almost immediately when she had not pulled a single prank throughout the entire cup of nations tournament. The public noticed soon after when photos of the teams celebrations were posted and Kyra was hardly smiling in any of the pictures, preferring to keep to herself in the locker rooms after wins.

Kyra is pulled out of her trance when she feels her phone vibrating from the seat next to her she grabs it and sees an incoming call from you, she answered being greeted by your grinning face.

'Hello Ky.' You called happily at her whilst you walked back from Cobham, after your first full training session back with the team. You had a coffee in your hand and had a scarf wrapped around your shoulders, dressed in a large Chelsea puffer jacket with your hair pulled up into a messy bun strands blowing around your face from the strong wind. 'Sorry, I'm a mess I have a photoshoot in just over an hour so I'm in a rush.' You tell her, but Kyra didn't think you looked a mess she thought you looked beautiful, but she thought you were always stunning she never told anyone about how she felt, she thought it would be weird to go around saying how good you looked.

Kyra hadn't told anyone, but in the time the two of you had been apart Kyra had begun to feel differently towards you but she tried to hide it not wanting it to be awkward. She couldn't stop thinking about you her thoughts often wondering back to your cute smile or your laugh which you hated but she loved. Recently she'd been prioritizing your facetime calls over important stuff she was meant to be doing and whenever you did something Kyra felt like a millions butterflies were flying around in her stomach.

At first Kyra was scared of these feelings but she'd accepted them just thinking it was because she missed you a lot and when you came back from injury everything would go back to normal. It couldn't just be her that thought you were the prettiest person alive, surely anyone in their right mind could see that right?

'Kyra Lilee Cooney-Cross? Are you still there? Helloooo earth to Kyra...' you loudly spoke into the phone, pulling Kyra out of her trance and she blushed after realising she had been staring at you all this time.

'Sorry 'bout that.' Kyra says embarrassed. 'How are you? Did the scans go alright?'

'I'm good, the scans went well. My physio said that my rehab is going really well and I'm actually ahead of the schedule and...' A huge grin spreads out on your face, 'I could even be back for the game against Leicester on the 11th which means I'm allowed to play in the world cup. But that's only if Tony choses me.'

'Are you kidding Y/N/N? That's amazing, I'm so proud of you, and of course Tony's going to choose you for the world cup if your back in time, he'd be stupid not to.' Kyra matches your energy a grin spreading over her face. 'We better start planning more pranks on the girls for when you come back. I think Steph should be our first target.' You laugh, and Kyra can't help but feel that familiar giddy sensation in her stomach as your laughter fills her ears.

You plan pranks you can pull together before you notice the time. 'I got to go now Kyra. But I just want to thank you so much for your support, I seriously couldn't have been where I am today without everything you've done for me.' Kyra grins, rolling her eyes.

'Don't be silly, I did nothing, you did all the hard work. I just did whatever any best friend would do.' She tells you brushing it off as if the hours she spent on the phone with you even if it was just you talking to her while you were doing your rehab were nothing.

'Well thanks regardless. I owe you big time' You tell her, knowing that she spent so much of her time helping you. 'But I really got to go now. I love you bye.' You tell her blowing a kiss she tells you goodbye as you hang up the phone leaving Kyra on her own again.

time skip to after the england game

'Yes Cha Cha.' Kyra says leaping on her best friends back followed by Mini who was had Harper on her back. She wrapped her close friend in a tight hug placing a joking kiss on her cheek swinging her around to celebrate the girls first ever goal for the Matildas. The trio and Harper stay a while celebrating the win against England.

Despite the adrenaline pumping through Kyra's body, she still felt like something was missing. You and Kyra had always talked about how one day the two of you would play in Wembley together and all the things you'd do once you won and it made Kyra sad that you weren't here to celebrate the win. 'You alright kiddo?' Mini asks Kyra placing a soft hand on her back watching as Mackenzie Arnold and Charli Grant chased harper around on the grass.

'I dunno, it's complicated.' Kyra says not wanting to talk about it right now, knowing it sounded stupid.

'Is it about y/n?' Katrina asked the younger girl and Kyra looks at her in shock of how she knew so quickly about what it was about.

'How'd you know?' Kyra asked slightly embarrassed.

'I'm basically your mum Kyra. I know you better than you'd think.' She says teasingly 'Plus ever since y/n's been out, you've been acting differently, everyones noticed. And we're all worried about you Kyra. I know you miss your best friend but everyone's going to get injured from time to time, you can't let that affect your game.'

'It's more than me missing her. I can't stop thinking about her, she's actually taking over my mind. And I've been getting all these weird feelings, like whenever she calls me I get butterflies in my stomach, and she's so pretty, and sometimes I'd rather be on a call with her than do anything else. I don't know why I'm feeling this way mini, it's scaring me. I don't want to ruin our friendship because I have these weird and stupid feelings.' Kyra huffs tears threatening to spill.

'Kyra, have you ever maybe considered you might like y/n?' Katrina asks the younger Aussie.

'Of course I like her Kat, she's my best friend are you stupid?' Kyra says to her mother like figure confused at her logic.

'I mean, have you ever considered you might like her more than just a friend.'

'But she's my friend, I can't like her like that. I'll ruin everything.' she speaks fast worried about if what Mini is saying could be true.

'It's not the end of the world to have a crush Kyra.' Mini says soothingly, patting Kyra on the back. 'Everyone has a crush on someone, and you don't even have to tell her how you feel if it worries you too much, but from what I've noticed I'm pretty sure she likes you too.' Mini whispers the last part before noticing harper faceplanting on the floor, running off to check on her daughter. Leaving Kyra to take in everything Katrina said. It made sense now, everything she was feeling.

time skip to pre world cup

The Matildas had started arriving to prepare for the upcoming world cup. Much to much of the publics surprise you had made a record return being welcomed back into the squad for the world cup, grateful that Tony still chose you even though you weren't even close to the form you were in before your injury. You were arriving to camp a few hours later than everyone else with Sam, meaning that when you arrived late that evening everyone was always eating dinner, you hopped out of the car, feeling gross from the long flight and jetlag kicking in.

'wait her y/n/n. I'm gonna get everyone excited for their favourite player to be back.' You only half comprehended what Sam told you but waited outside until you heard Sam shouting your name. You slowly walked into the room dragging your suitcase behind you, your mood brightening when you walked into the room filled with all your teammates clapping.

'Hey guys.' Is all you say unable to say much more from tiredness and shock that you were back so much sooner than you expected. People laugh before starting to make their way towards you. Steph's the first person to pull you into a hug, whispering how proud she is of you into your ear, everyone else shortly follows saying similar stuff to Steph. Macca is one of the last people to embrace you.

'I would like to say I'm the most excited for you to be back but I'm afraid Kyra probably wins that competition.' You laugh at her before comprehending the fact that you hadn't gotten a hug yet from your best friend. 'Where is Kyra anyways?' You ask Mackenzie, she smiled at you and it was almost like a scene from a movie the way she stepped aside to reveal a tired looking Kyra standing behind her.

No words are spoken between the two of you until her arms are wrapped around you. 'I've missed you so much.' You tell her

'Missed you more.' She responds making you laugh slightly.

'Are you ready to do the plan for steph.' You ask her a cheeky grin spreading on the two of your faces as you pull away to face each other.

'never been readier.' You both laugh before alanna pulls you away from each other.

'You've only been back together for less than a minute and your already planning something.' she says sternly ruffling your hair and you both give her an innocent smile, something you always used to do when people suspected you of something. 'well go eat something, then go to sleep. you look awful y/n.' You roll your eyes scoffing.

'Wow Lani, you're kinder than I remembered.' You laugh as she shoves you away.

'Just eat kid.' In the small time you speak with Alanna you don't notice Kyra head back to the table and go back to eating without another word.

'You ok Kyra?' Mini whispers to the midfielder.

'Yeah Ky, I thought you would want to be spending every second with y/n/n, you've been waiting for her to get back for like ever. She's all you ever talk about.' Charli basically interrogates her friend who looks visibly uncomfortable causing Mini to kick the number 22, sending her a stern glare that gets her to shut up. Kyra didn't expect it to feel so awkward to be back with her best friend, but she couldn't stop thinking about her and Mini's conversation after the England game. She didn't want to ruin their friendship because of her silly emotions so for now she planned to keep quieter around y/n and try distance herself.

i will be doing a part 2 soon

#kyra cooney cross #kyra cooney cross x reader #woso #matildas #chelsea #arsenal #charligrant #auswnt #arsenal wfc #chesleawfc

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todomochi-uwu · 10 months

Text

Who. (3/?) J. Y & S. M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Other chapters: Part 1 Part 2 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee ☕

“You remember the day we met?”

“How can I not? You were always running after me every chance you had.”

“Hey! I wanted to be your friend; I was a lonely child.”

Yunho and Mingi met when they were just children, on the playground, next to the swings. The younger one had been sitting on one of them, swinging his feet and looking at the ground, occasionally looking at the other children, wanting to play with them, but being too shy to ask. He had been there for a long time, until one of them pushed him off the swing, making him scratch the palm of his hands and the top of his knees on the ground, small teardrops started falling down his eyes, between the pain and the humiliation. He wanted to run back home and hide in his room until a small hand appeared in front of him.

“Are you okay?”

Mingi took the other boy’s hand, picking himself up and dusting his clothes off. “Yeah, thank you.”

The kid frowned, looking down at his scratched skin, “You are bleeding, come, my mom will clean you up.” He interlaced their fingers and made Mingi follow him.

And that’s how everything started. Mingi felt as if he owed Yunho for his kindness, so when he found out they went to the same school he made it his mission to follow him around everywhere he went, and while at first the older boy had thought it was a bit weird to have someone always on his tail, he quickly grew accustomed to it. They became a unit, there wasn’t one without the other, same group of friends, same schools, same everything; from children to hormonal teenagers, to young adults, and finally adults.

Yunho can’t remember when he started feeling the way he felt about Mingi, he just suddenly realised that the boy who had been next to him every day for the last twelve years made his cheeks turn red; that he would often find himself staring at him for long periods of times, admiring how much his features had changed from when they were children. He had lost all the baby fat in his face, a slimmer and sharper jawline, his piercing eyes had lost that innocent shimmer and now made his knees grow weak, and how pink and plump his lips were. Yunho wanted to die every day, knowing it wasn’t normal to think that way about his best friend, or any boy at all; crying himself to sleep wishing to wake up “normal”, luckily for him, his mom was a saint, and when she noticed her son’s feelings, she let him know that what he was feeling was completely okay and she would support him no matter what.

What he didn’t know was that Mingi was right in the same sport as he was. He had noticed the way his heart skipped a bit every time Yunho looked his way, how puffy his cheeks were and how the way he laughed made him look like a puppy, how nice his fingers looked when he was typing across the keyboard. He was in trouble, he feared rejection, he feared getting heartbroken, but amongst everything, he feared losing Yunho.

Funnily enough, all it took for their love to blossom was a shot of vodka and a game of spin the bottle, Yunho now cringes at the thought that their first kiss was drunk in front of their friends; Mingi finds it sweet—first kiss, first love, first everything. Mingi remembers Yunho’s face the first time they made love, his puffy cheeks reddening up, lips parted and small gasps left his throat, his lips swollen from making out; he looked ethereal. He remembers the way his boyfriend had been so gentle, so patient with him. Yunho remembers the way Mingi whispered sweet words of affirmation in his ear, telling him how much he loved him, and how good everything felt. And while the first may have been somewhat awkward, both truly inexperienced and nervous, it was a memory they were both fond of.

“You remember how you told me you loved me the first time?” Mingi giggled, laying his head on Yunho’s shoulder, leaning further down on the couch outside their apartment’s balcony. They were looking at the stars trying to distract themselves, feeling too anxious to do anything else.

“Oh god, please don’t remind me. I was such a fucking idiot.” He facepalmed himself, feeling the cringe cover his body.

“You came up to my house with a bouquet of lilies you stole from your neighbour’s garden, banged on my door, and when I opened the door, you just screamed, “Do you like me back?” No, I like you. No, do you want to be my boyfriend? No. Just, do you like me back?”

“I’m sorry, I was a little bisexual closeted teenager trying to confess to his best friend, I didn’t know there was formal etiquette to asking you out.”

Mingi let out another small laugh, taking Yunho’s face between his hands and leaned up for a kiss. Slow, gentle, full of love, just like how all of their relationship had been, until recently. They stayed silent for a little while, lost in their thoughts.

“Do you remember the day we met her?”

College days were blurred memories for both boys; too busy with law and med school, always stressed, always horny and always sleepy. That week Wooyoung had invited the couple to a party at his house, it had been the first time in months they had the time to have fun, so they eagerly accepted. The first task that night was getting drunk off their minds, the next one was to dance and chat all they could and the last one was to go back to the apartment and fuck each other's brains out, it sounded like a good plan. Only one thing got in their way, you.

Mingi had been sitting down on the armrest of an old and crusty couch, sipping on something someone had told him was “jungle juice”, a beverage that tasted like ass, but was getting him tipsy, so that was fine by him. He was looking around, trying to find his boyfriend in the crowd, when his eyes came across a view that had him questioning if what was before his eyes was real, or if he was just starting to hallucinate from the drink.

“Hey, Mingi! Haven't seen you in a while, where have you been, man?” Han side hugged me, and Mingi tried to focus on what he was saying, but he just couldn’t, not when you were right there. He prayed on the back of his head that you weren’t dating Jisung, “Oh, right, I'm sorry, babe. Y/n, this my friend Mingi. Mingi, this is Y/n.” He could hear his heartbeat in his ears, blood drowning the inside of his cheeks and air escaping his lungs, how does one talk again?

“Hi.” You smiled at him. He was done.

It would be a lie to say you were not feeling the same. The pain Chan had been leaving in your heart for the past months went away in a second, the weight being lifted off your shoulders. Jisung had pitied you the second he noticed the way you were looking at his friend, he didn’t know how to bring up the fact that Mingi wasn’t single, of course, that was until he saw he was looking at you the same way. Surprised and confused, he decided to excuse himself, not wanting to get involved in the potential mess.

You guys went outside, claiming the noise was overwhelming you, it was there where a tall figure crossed your way, going directly to your new friend. “Hey, baby.” The new stranger said, while leaning down and doing the same thing you’ve been wanting to do all night, Mingi kissed him back.

“Hi, love. I tried looking for you, but couldn’t find you.”

“I had to come outside, Seonghwa and San were becoming too much, and I'm tired. Do you want to leave?”

You stared at the ground, feeling your heart fall to your stomach, Of course, you had gone out to forget about one guy and another one had crushed you.

“Yunho, this is Y/n. Y/n this is my boyfriend, Yunho.”

Boyfriend, great. You never even had a chance.

You looked up, ready to say hello and get the hell out of there, but you made eye contact with him, and all of a sudden everything turned even more confusing in your head. Yunho’s eyes widened the second they saw yours, his heart stopped, and the spit in his throat made him choke. Easy to say, Mingi and Yunho didn’t leave that party as they planned, they spent hours and hours with you, getting to know you, making you laugh, flirt with you… Jisung had come back, ready to leave when the scene in front of him had completely startled him. There you were, in between the two men, one of them devouring your mouth like there was no tomorrow while the other one groped your hips and sucked on your neck. Han is a good friend because even though he wanted to leave after fighting with Minho, he decided to wait for you, wanting you to have a good time and forget about Chan, so he spent the next hours going and coming back to see if you were done. Finally, you were done and gone with two new numbers on your phone and the promise of a date the next day.

“I was so scared that night,” Yunho confessed for the first time.

Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed, “why?”

“Well, yeah we both made out with her that night, but I knew I liked her the second I saw her, I wanted something more, but I didn’t want to lose you, and I didn’t even know how that would work.”

“We acted as if we knew what the hell we were doing, like some experts in polyamorous relationships.” The lawyer grinned, “I was also worried she would wake up the next morning and completely forget about us, or just see us as a one-time thing.”

Both smiled at the idea that that didn’t happen, but it turned sour the second they remembered that while they had managed to get you, they had also managed to lose you.

“I miss her, Min.”

“Don’t worry, Yuyu. We’ll bring her back home, I promise.” He wanted to reassure his partner, but the same he was nervous, could they?

____________________________________________

“Oh my god, Chan! I’m so happy for you.” You threw your hands around him, shaking him around excitedly.

“It's not that big of a deal, Y/n.” His cheeks turned red.

“It’s not a big deal? Chan, you finally got that promotion you’ve been waiting for years, this is huge!” You jumped around, making Chan laugh, “We have to celebrate, let's go out tonight, I’ll call Jisung.” She skipped to her room, not waiting for Chan’s answer.

You always made him special, like everything he did was amazing, and his heart couldn’t help but feel warm and heavy in his chest. It had been a little bit more than two and a half months since you had appeared on his doorstep, and his head had been going to the same place again and again the last few days, would it be okay if he tried anything? He didn’t expect you to answer right away or to even like him back, but he could still hope. He had noticed that in the last weeks, you had stopped crying, you stopped looking at your phone every five minutes or at every notification that popped up, and you stopped mentioning them all together, could you be moving on? This and more questions circled his head as he finished getting ready, he had taken a shower and chosen an outfit that didn’t consist of an oversized hoodie and baggy shorts; he needed all the luck and advantage he could get. He was wearing his favourite black combat boots, some black ripped skinny jeans, the ones that hugged his legs and ass just right (according to Changbin), a black crop top that Han had gifted him, claiming “it was a crime the world had never seen his abs in one of those”, but he had never worn it due to being too shy, a jean jacket and a bunch of black and silver jewellery adorning his hands, wrists, ears and neck, his hair straighten and slicked back, opposed to his usual messy curls.

He had just come out of his room, when you ran into him, “Jesus Christ, Chan, you look so good.” Your eyes were everywhere on his body, but his eyes. Chris couldn't help but feel a bust of confidence.

“You don’t look half bad.” You were wearing a tight black leather skirt with a blue spaghetti strap lace top (it was Mingi’s favourite outfit on you, it gave you confidence, and made you feel good about yourself, but Chan didn’t have to know that), on your neck was his favourite necklace, the one he had been wearing and had left on the bathroom counter, right before taking a shower and you had found. “You are wearing my necklace.” He gulped, and he scolded himself in his head, why was he acting like a hormonal teenager all of a sudden? You did weird things to his head.

“Oh yeah, I was going to give it to you, but it looked good with my outfit, I hope you don’t mind.” You batted your eyes at him, trying to look cute so he didn’t make you take the jewellery off.

His mouth dried up. Fuck, Chris, get it together, he thought. “I don’t, it’s okay.”

You smiled brightly at him, “I’m ready, I’ll just go and put my shoes on. Can you go get Jisung meanwhile?”

He nodded and turned around, hyping himself up the entire way to your friend’s apartment.

____________________________________________

“You said she would be here, Minho,” Yunho said, they were standing in front of Chan’s door.

“I didn’t know they were going out tonight, calm down Jeong.”

“Jisung didn’t tell you he was going out with them?”

Minho sighed, exasperated with the couple, “I forgot, okay? Besides now you know where she is, you can come back another time and…” Mingi was quick to cut him off.

“No, I'm not leaving until I see her. I've been going crazy for months and I’m not going without talking to her.” He sat down on the floor, next to the door, “I'm waiting here until they come back.”

Minho looked at him in disbelief, “You can not stay there, they’ll be gone for hours, and you might freak out some of the neighbours.

Mingi simply shrugged, looking down at the floor.

Minho turned to look at Yunho, wanting him to do something about his partner, but he was already sitting down next to him. “You cannot be serious.”

“We are not leaving until we see her. End of story.”

Minho threw back his head, exhausted and annoyed with their stubbornness, “Suit yourselves.” He disappeared down the hall.

____________________________________________

Han looked at Chan while he looked at her, the memory of their college relationship popped into his head. He remembers consoling you, trying to mend your broken heart as best as he could; he remembered why you ended things, why you moved on, how you did it. He also remembers finding out about Chan’s feelings, that same night Minho went to pick him up after he passed out drunk. He remembered feeling guilty for introducing you to them, for not having a clue Chan reciprocated your feelings. And tonight, he couldn't help, once again, but feel bad for the producer, if only he had said something, would things be different now?

“I didn't know you still felt that way about her…” Jisung said as he took a sip of his drink.

Chan looked at the floor, and shook his head, “Did Minho tell you?”

“He didn’t have to.”

____________________________________________

Minho couldn’t sleep. He kept turning and tossing in his bed, and no, it wasn’t the lack of his husband next to him, it was the pair of idiots down the hall that crowded his head. He couldn’t help, but feel bad for them, having been in the same situation as them, lost, heartbroken, fearing the uncertainty his relationship had been a few years ago. He wanted to ignore so badly that feeling in his gut, telling him to help them, but he just couldn’t, so he got up from the bed and made his way, once again, down to Chan’s apartment.

There they were, asleep. Mingi was lying on Yunho’s shoulder covering it in drool, while the other one had a look of discomfort on his face, even asleep he could feel how uncomfortable was the wall he was leaning against.

Minho crouched down, shaking his fellow rival doctor by the shoulder, “Jeong, wake up.” He whispered, “Come on, idiot. I don’t have all day.”

Yunho opened his eyes, at first alarmed, but then confused. Y/n wasn’t there, why was he being awoken?

“Be quiet, I'm taking you there, get up.” He got up, ready to walk away, “Hurry up and don’t wake up Mingi. I certainly don’t need two idiots in my car, and I doubt she wants to see you both,”

____________________________________________

Taglist:

@tunaasan @scuzmunkie @jeongwangjessmina @certifiedmoa @tenebrisirae @ddaeing @bratty-tingz @myshadowsbackstage @berryfiavoured @jkookiejiminlvr @yunsara @soobiverse @kyeos4ng @asjkdk @popcatx0

#ateez #ateez angst #ateez smut #ateez x reader #jeong yunho #mingi angst #mingi smut #mingi x reader #song mingi #yunho angst #yunho x reader #yunho smut #mochi writes #yungi #ateez yungi #yungi x reader

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billskeis · 8 months

Note

hi, can u do 2008!tom x waitress!reader at a small cute coffee shop and they just like eachother after this n stuff (the rest is what u come up with!) tyy

ᡣ𐭩 tom and his waitress

the bell attached to the door jingles as people walk in and out within the cafe. it was a quaint sunday and the twins were just out and about looking for places to kill time as they just moved for the new school year.

it was a small town where everybody knew everyone and there was basically only one high school for them to attend there. bill didn’t mind the secluded area but his brother did.

“coffee? but you don’t drink that shit..” bill asked his twin brother.

“sshshhshshshush! you—you just have to wait and see..” tom exclaimed as he left his little brother confused, following behind him.

the sweet yet bitter aroma of coffee wafted around the small establishment. it was quite cute. european style. plants decorated the interior while the furniture was mostly that of dark oak, some of the windows were stained glass and classic jazz played in the background.

and there you stood, wiping down a small table with a clean, or could be dirty towel rag that hasn’t been thrown out—but still useful for who knows how long now.

your work uniform entailed that of just a slim fitting white tee as you wore blue skinny jeans that accentuated your curves. the dark brown apron only amplifying that as it was tied oh so tight around your waist, a bow behind to finish the look off altogether.

hair laid in a neat ponytail, your fringe framing your face and jawline just right. tom couldn’t help but stare, bill attempting to look around first until he found what his brother was staring at.

and of course, it was you.

“oh.. now i see,”

“isn’t she beautiful, bill?”

“mmhm, do you know her name?”

“nope! this is my first time entering in actually, i’ve passed by this coffee shop maybe two or three times?? never had the balls to actually WALK IN unless i brought you,”

“…”

“what?”

“you’re fucking lame.”

“oh shut up—hey! what’re you doing!?” tom semi shouts at bill as the slimmer twin attempts to push tom’s somewhat burly body closer to the table you were cleaning at.

“making a move tom, since it took ya this fucking long!” bill yelled at his brother to his surprise was able to even move him an inch? had bill been working out? tom stumbled as he was now met with your table and obviously, you.

“o-oh! hello! welcome!” you smiled brightly and put on your best customer service voice as you were met with two peculiar but cute looking boys who seemed around your age.

looking and analyzing them more made you question whether the pair were a set of twins.

“i uh.. uh.. can we sit here?” the baggier clothed wearing one asked you as the latter facepalmed himself. “of course you can silly, please sit! my name is y/n, what can i get you guys to drink?” you immediately shove the rag down into one of your apron pockets and pull out a small notebook and pen, clicking it in anticipation to write what they request.

as the two analyzed the small menu engraved on the table, the black haired boy spoke “i’ll do a caffé mocha, please,” as you scribble his order down now looking at the dread haired boy.

“coca cola.” he answered.

“a huh?” you asked, hearing him well, you were just, confused.

“a coke..?”

“no—sorry—i heard you the first time it’s just, you want soda at a cafe??”

bill looked at his brother as if he was totally and utterly fucking stupid. one could say, you can hear bill exhale so hard from disappointment that the amount of air that dispelled out of him could probably blow someone away.

“well shit, ummm what do you recommend?” the boy asks eagerly as he leans his body closer to yours while sitting in the chair. excitingly waiting for your answer.

it is said that someone’s coffee order says a lot about them.

you press your pen to your chin as you held the notebook under your arm. giving it some thought, you yourself weren’t the coffee drinker but now having worked in a cafe for soo long it become a part of your personality. “hm..”

“i would have to go for a flat white!”

“flat white it is then, y/n :).”

you write down his order, clicking the pen.

“alrighty! could i get your names please?”

“tom.”

“bill.”

“okay tom and bill, give me ten minutes!”

you skip away to begin working on their drinks as tom waves you away, bill just watching him, “your ass is grass tom,”

“i don’t know what you mean,”

“you. head over heels for some girl you couldn’t even talk to!”

“aren’t you the one preaching about love at first sight though?? yeah, come talk to me when you’ve actually got that.”

“eat shit, tom.”

“get some bitches, bill.”

“aaand i’m back! i hope my two new and favourite customers haven’t been waiting too long!” you place down the mugs gently on the table as you hold the large plastic serving tray behind your back. “nono, you could’ve taken as much time as you needed,” a smile coming from tom as bill rolls his eyes quickly enough at tom that you don’t see but returns the smile.

tom brings the cup to his lips as he takes a sip of the brewed beverage. he licks his lips whereas a remnant of the foam encoated and slightly smacks them to review the flavour.

unknowingly, you were anticipating his reaction more than bills. maybe it was because of how he looked at you, with such attention. or how he was way more willing to speak to you than bill was.

your stomach felt uncomfortable with a thumpy feeling, you choose to ignore it.

“soo.. how is it?”

“amazing.. i’ve never had coffee this good in my life!”

the uncomfortable feeling in your stomach grew stronger. your cheeks also somewhat felt warmer. a beating in your chest that just would not go away.

did he see it yet?

“yay! i’m so glad :D what about you bill?”

“couldn’t have been any better,”

“well, i’ll leave you alone—i have other customers, but do let me know if you need or want anything else!”

a silence was met as you left the table where the two young boys sat. they looked at one another, knowingly. telepathically. it’s like one knew that something was wrong with the other and it didn’t even need to be spoken.

“tell the truth tom.. how was it,”

“it was fucking terrible..”

tom contorted his face in disgust as he lifted up the mug to his face once more to breathe in the smell of the coffee.

how can something that smells so good taste like shit?

he kept his disgusted face plastered on as bill giggled at his brother’s antiques. that was until you innocently made eye contact with him and smiled, to which he just begins chugging the coffee (yes, burning his throat in the process) signalling you a thumbs-up as you laugh at him.

it wasn’t that the flat white you made was bad. you were the best barista in the tiny shop, and at such a young age too! it was that no matter how much tom drank it or whatever type of coffee that tom drank.

he. fucking. hated it.

“wow, you got it bad for her huh..”

“shut up.. i need her number now. i can’t keep drinking this nasty shit.”

as tom played with the tiny spoon that he used to mix his coffee within the mug, bill’s eyed widened at the sight that sat below him on the table, slightly gasping, “tom!”

“what? what is it?” tom now looked at bill who’s smiling and holding up a piece of paper. it was the napkin that decorated the circular plate accompanied with your mug.

there on it was decorated a subtle lipgloss stained kiss along with some writing.

“call me xxx-xxx-xxx c:”

bill wiggled the napkin in front of his twin brother at tom gripped it out of his grasp quickly but softly enough to not rip or ruin the frail napkin.

“well it looks like she beat you to it.”

he looked up from the napkin to watch you interact and tend to other customers. god he wishes that were him instead of some stranger, making you smile and laugh like that. it was almost criminal at the impact you had on him.

you catch tom and bill staring at you as you work, bill obviously looking away but tom kept his gaze on you. you noticed that he held a napkin in his hand as his whole body was shifted towards your direction.

wink.

“holy sh1@!8 bill! did you see that she winked at me!!”

tom swears he can feel his heart come out his chest as he clutches the enlarged shirt from the upper middle of his torso that draped over his body.

“i didn’t, but if you really wanted let’s go pay now before she gets off cash!”

“i—i can’t bill, here take the money,” as tom shoves a $20 bill into his brother’s hand as he makes his way towards the exit, “tell her i said i had to walk georg—i mean, our dog!!”

“but..! ugghhh…”

“chickened out? was the napkin too much?” you ask bill as you cash out the money he gave you, returning the extra change by placing the coins into the palm of bill’s hand.

bill scoffs and almost laughs, “i don’t think so, i think he’s just a pussy. but he reallllyyy likes you, like, it’s insane i’ve never seen him act like this before.”

“haha.. well, you take care bill! i’ll see you at school tomorrow!” waving the twin brother away as he makes his way outside the cafe. “bye y/n!” bill had totally and completely forgotten that today was a sunday and monday was going to be their first day back in senior year.

...

wait.

“y/n goes to our school!?”

#tokio hotel #tokio hotel x y/n #tokio hotel x you #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel fluff #tom kaulitz x y/n #tom kaulitz x you #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz fluff #2000s #fyp

149 notes · View notes

moonjxsung · 1 year

Text

Not Allowed (pt. 2)

TV GIRL / NOT ALLOWED

Link to part 1 here

⇢ Pairing: Lee Felix x fem reader

⇢ Summary: You and Felix are childhood friends turned fwb, with no strings attached. Felix leaves to pursue his idol dreams, and you begin your life as a college student. When he comes back to visit your town, he’s drawn to you again- but you’re both leading very different lives.

⇢ Warning: smut lol

⇢ W/c: 20k? idk

⇢ A/n: inspired by the TV Girl song “not allowed” <3 this has a lot of smut bc the whole song is abt sex so if ur uncomfortable with that, please don’t interact!

// MINORS DNI // DO NOT STEAL OR REPOST MY WORK

Disclaimer: All characters in this story are 18+. the actions and story represented in this work do not represent Stray Kids in any way; everything described is purely a work of fiction!

You felt your heart drop in your chest. The conversation was not going to be free of hostility. Unsure of how to answer, you locked eyes with him, letting your expression soften into one of remorse.

“I like it. The blonde.”

He gave a small nod. “Thank you.”

You looked around nervously, debating whether you should just get up and leave. He wasn’t going to give up without a confrontation or an apology, both of which were off the table for you.

“I’m gonna go order,” he said, smoothing down his top as he stood up. “Americano?”

You nodded, studying the pattern of the table below you. “Yeah, thanks.”

As he walked down the stairs to the counter, you replayed your thoughts in your head. This was going to be a colossal waste of time if you didn’t drop the cool girl act and just communicate with him like a normal human being. Not even your arguments with Mark were like this, so why were you so averse to doing the right thing? After all, it’s not like you were going to stay at your parents’ place for longer than a week. All of this would be out of sight and out of mind in due time, and you were determined to make it end on a positive note.

When Felix returned, he held two iced americanos in either hand, clutching a small paper bag of croissants in the crook of his elbow.

“Thank you,” you said as he carefully set yours in front of you. The rich, warm scent of both calmed your nerves a little as you took a sip of your coffee and nibbled a bite of the pastry.

Felix sat back in his chair and rested a slender hand on his cheek as he looked at you.

“What?” you asked, worried you’d gotten something on your face.

He shook his head. “Just looking.”

“You’re staring,” you replied, a bashful smile growing on your face for the first time all morning.

“I can’t stare?” He inquired.

“I guess you can if you want to. It’s just a little odd, is all.”

He cocked his head slightly. “I’m catching up on five years of changes. I promise I’m almost done.”

“Okay, okay. I digress.” you said, taking another sip of coffee and staring back at him.

Felix’s hair was much longer than it was all those years ago, reaching just below the nape of his neck. His face was also much slimmer, and he looked rather intimidating with his carved-out jawline and hollowed cheeks. But his eyes were still soft, his button nose still a focal point of his beauty, and his lips even plumper and more pink than you’d remembered.

“You look good,” Felix said in a voice barely above a whisper.

You felt the heat rushing to your cheeks, suddenly more aware of your own appearance, and smiled politely in response.

“Thanks. You look good, too.”

Felix took a sip of his coffee, and then his face turned serious again.

“You… never called.”

You furrowed your brows at him, surprised at how quickly the conversation had changed pace.

“I tried you a couple times. Never heard back.”

You did your best to remain calm, feeling angry at the audacity he had to accuse you of being the one to cut him off. He’d been the one with a time change, phone restrictions, and a whole new life to adjust to. As far as you were concerned, he’d transformed into a completely different person- whether he wanted you to remain in his life was up to him entirely.

“You did? When?”

You shook your head with a dismissive smile.

“When? I don’t know- some time and date five years ago?”

“You didn’t try again after that?”

At this point, you could feel yourself getting pissed off.

“Why would I? I’m not even one to double text- what makes you think I should’ve tried for five years straight? I have a life too, you know.”

He ran a hand through his hair, smoothing down the longer bits and tucking them behind his ears once again.

“I guess… I just thought we ended on a different note than we actually did.”

You cocked your head. “And what note was that?”

He exhaled sharply through his nose. “I don’t know, every day for a whole summer it’s like you can’t get enough of me and now you want to pretend I don’t exist?”

You scoffed at the absurdity of his words, although he had a point.

“So I was supposed to keep trying your cell for five years straight because of some fleeting thing that happened half a decade ago? And where were you in all of this? You had a phone, too.”

“I told you it’d be some time after my trainee period. When I didn’t hear from you, I figured you just didn’t care to talk.”

You rolled your eyes, scoffing again. “Jesus Christ. Was I supposed to be sending an owl every week? Sorry I didn’t get the memo.”

“I didn’t know you needed a memo to remember who I was.”

“I know who you are!”

“Then why are you acting like it never happened?”

You sat back in your chair, angry thoughts racing around your mind.

“Because!” You exclaimed, trying to compose yourself as you finally let your thoughts out.

“Because what we had wasn’t supposed to ruin our friendship! You left to be some mega-rich celebrity and I had to work my ass off to make a life for myself, only to never hear from you again. And now you’re back and I don’t know what it is that you want from me, but if it’s the same thing you wanted all those years ago then you can forget this little meeting ever happened. I’m not some side piece you have when you’re not filming commercials or singing on stage. Believe it or not, I have a life outside of whatever the hell this is.”

He shook his head in disbelief, and a silence washed over both of you. You glanced around the floor, hoping nobody heard any of that. The other diners seemed to be wrapped up in their own conversations, and you felt a minuscule sense of relief.

“I can’t believe you think that’s why I came back. Even back then.”

You stayed quiet, feeling defensive and irate.

“We never should’ve done it in the first place,” you said, lowering your head.

He swallowed a lump in his throat.

“You really feel like that?” Felix asked.

You gave a small nod, holding back frustrated tears.

“Yeah, I do. I wouldn’t have to spend my adult life running from such a stupid mistake.”

Felix’s lips pulled into that same thin-lipped expression of hurt, and he raised his eyebrows.

“Okay. If that’s how you feel.”

Without another word, he pushed out his chair behind him, and gathered the mostly-full drink and crumbs of his unfinished croissant.

You remained seated at the table as he gave you a small bow and made his way to the stairs. And then he was out of sight, for the fourth time that week.

You probably cried for hours that night. It was getting old fast, this torturous act of hurting Felix and then feeling guilty for hours on end. But you couldn’t help the way you felt about the whole situation.

You’d seen the interviews, watched the way he filmed alongside beautiful Korean women and traveled the world to perform in front of thousands of pretty girls. He had the world at his fingertips, and yet he used the brief moment of time you slept with him as a weapon against you- as if he hadn't moved on several times before all this. Moved on to a new place, a new life- probably even several other women.

When you’d finally begun to doze off to sleep, after hours of battling a pounding headache, a startling noise woke you up again.

Three brisk knocks on your window- just like they’d always occurred.

Your heartbeat quickened, and you looked at the clock while still adjusting to the atmosphere around you. It was just past midnight. You crawled out of the comfort of your bed, fixing your hair briefly and pulling up the blinds to get a good look.

Felix stood against the dark night sky, casually dressed in a light gray hoodie and track pants. His hands were shoved in his pockets, head hung in deep remorse.

When you opened the window and looked at him, his glossy eyes suggested he’d been crying too.

“Hi,” Felix said quietly. “Can I come in?”

You complied, stepping aside as he hoisted a leg over the sill and climbed into the small space of your room. It felt like old times, only this time it was tainted by tension and your caution so as to not overstep boundaries.

You sat on the edge of your bed, and Felix found a seat on the desk chair across from you.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I was angry. And I let my emotions get the best of me.”

You chewed on the inside of your lip, an anxious habit that made itself known whenever you had to tear your own walls down.

“I reached out because I cared about you,” he continued. “Five years ago. And I still do. I had zero intention of sleeping with you. It just happened. And it’s not going to happen again. I never would’ve just used you for sex. Part of me wants to think that you know that, too.”

You began to cry even again, wiping tears with the back of your hand. You knew he was right, and you didn’t actually believe that. His intentions had just gotten blurry with him being so far away.

“Hey…” he said, finding his way next to you and wrapping you in a warm hug. “I’m really sorry I hurt you. I was just being selfish.”

You gasped through tears at his words. “I could never forget you,” you blurted out, almost pleading for him to unlearn whatever you’d made him think before. “And I don’t think you used me for sex. It’s just… overwhelming having you back. I don’t think you realize how fucking hard it was for me when you left.”

Felix wiped a tear from your cheek with his thumb. “You don’t think it was hard for me, either? I wanted to tell you so much. I wanted to call you up every chance that I got, but I couldn’t. And then when I didn’t hear from you I thought… I thought maybe I just cared more than you did.”

You shook your head. “I cared, too. Don’t ever think I didn’t care.”

Felix nodded, a kind of light in his eyes at your admittance.

“Can I stay for a bit?” Felix asked, hoping he wasn’t overstepping his boundaries by inquiring. “Nothing weird, I’ll even stay on the floor. I just want to catch up. As friends.”

It was your turn to nod, sitting back against the headboard and pulling your blanket up to your waist. He sat cross legged facing you, both of your gazes meeting each other with curious smiles. And for a small moment in time, you were those careless kids all over again.

You don’t remember Felix leaving, but he did. You also weren’t sure when you’d fallen asleep. Beams of sunlight shining over your eyelids woke you up, and your room was quiet and vacant except for a small note on the desk.

Y/n,

Had to leave for a family thing. See you later tonight?

PS- you still snore

-Felix

You chuckled lightly at the note, remembering the way he’d teased you about that back then.

You’d thought it to be a dream for a second, gripping the note firmly in your hands to remind you it was in fact, real. Felix had been here last night, and you finally didn’t want to cry at the thought of seeing him again. In fact, it excited you.

At breakfast, you thought over the conversations you had last night. Felix told you about his trainee days, long ones spent studying Korean and practicing dances in small, crowded rooms. He recounted the shows he was on, expressing the premature grief he’d felt at almost getting completely eliminated. He told you about the members, eyes filling with joy as he described them in great detail and summarized their seven starkly different personalities.

He told you about how much he’d missed his sisters, how long plane rides finally didn’t make him nauseous anymore, and how he felt much more natural being blonde.

And about how he thought of you every time he stopped at a McDonald’s. He also still used his raspberry chapstick, on his third tube now. And he missed you.

“I never forgot about you. Not once,” he said honestly. “I stopped getting Oreo mcflurries because they tasted so much like you. It was a flavor I wanted to preserve in that little time and space. I feared I’d… lose it.”

You bit back a smile from across the bed. He always had a way with his words, but hearing the details of your relationship with him so eloquently relayed back to you made your head spin.

“We’ll I’m sorry for ruining your favorite McDonald’s order,” you’d said back to him in a joking tone. You didn’t want to give him the wrong idea by entertaining the narrative too much. You kept it platonic.

After all, you still had Mark waiting for you back at home. As your mind snapped back to Mark, your eyes shifted around the room in a panic. It’d been days since you heard from him, and he never answered your last text. In a sudden panic, you reached for your phone and began to dial him, before hanging up and thinking it over. You desperately needed a new set of clothes, and it wouldn’t hurt to check on the apartment.

So after a quick shower and some breakfast, you grabbed your keys and started off toward the apartment again. Not quite ready to return to the place of tedious routine.

As you unlocked the door, an overpowering scent filled the room, making you scrunch your nose in displeasure.

“Mark?” you called out, scanning the room for him.

The kitchen was a mess, dishes piled high in the sink with remnants of previous meals all over them. The table was sprawled with unopened mail and- beer bottles. You knew instantly.

“Mark?” you called again, growing angry at the state of the apartment.

As you made your way into the living room, you finally saw him. Sprawled on the couch, a beer bottle clutched in his hand as a loud game of baseball echoed from the tv.

“Mark? Why is the place so messy?”

He said nothing in response, fixated on the screen in front of him, bringing the bottle to his lips to take another swig of beer.

“Mark?” you said again.

“Jesus- stop saying my name like that, I have a headache.”

Your heart dropped at his tone.

“Yeah, because it’s not even noon yet and you’re already piss drunk. What’s going on?”

He waved a hand to dismiss the conversation.

“No, none of that,” you said. “Tell me what’s going on with you.”

He kept his eyes glued to the game, the commentator’s words drowning out his slurred reply.

“I dunno. Have the place to myself considering my girlfriend left me. Just wanted a beer.”

“Left you?” you said in sheer disbelief. “I’m staying with my parents for a weekend and you think I left you?”

He shrugged. “You left me a while ago. You never want to sleep together anymore. We’re hardly even in the same bed, and when we are, you don’t tell me anything. You don’t visit me at work anymore. We haven’t gone on a proper date in forever. You’re always… gone. Even when you’re here, it’s like you’re not really here.”

It was the first time he sounded sober so far. Your heartbeat quickened with anxiety, as you weren’t prepared to be put on the spot like this.

You took a seat beside him timidly, folding your hands in your lap.

“Is that what this is about?”

“That’s what this has always been about!” he shouted, and you jumped in your seat. “Just say you don’t want this! Any of this,” he said, gesturing to the environment around you.

You shook your head. “I’m just stressed. I still want this, I want you.”

“Then why don’t you fucking act like it?” he questioned. You felt your eyes welling up with tears.

“When have I not acted like it?”

“When you decided your work was more important than us.”

“I have never once put more value into my job than our relationship. You know that. Just because we haven’t had sex or cuddled in a little while doesn’t mean I’m not still here.”

Mark threw his arms up and let out an exasperated sigh, beginning to cry.

“I lost my fucking job,” he said suddenly, hot tears streaming down his face

“You- What?” you said, mouth slightly parted in shock.

He buried his face in the palms of his hands, letting the beer bottle rest on his knee.

“They let me go.”

“When?” you asked, turning your body to face him more.

“Couple weeks ago.”

“Weeks?” you repeated. “Mark, why didn’t you tell me?”

He slouched further back into the couch. “I’m a fucking loser.”

“You’re not a loser,” you said. “You’re going through a tough time.”

You scooted closer to him, enveloping him in a hug and rubbing his knee soothingly.

“Where have you been if not the lab?” You asked suddenly, remembering he’d been gone for hours each night consistently.

He rolled his eyes, pulling away from you. “Does it matter?”

You squinted. “I’m just wondering.”

Mark shut his eyes, taking another swig of beer and ignoring your question. “I need a nap.”

You got up from the couch, gathering the garbage that surrounded him and making your way back to the kitchen.

“I’m gonna clean a little and grab my things. I just came here for a change of clothes.”

Soft snores emitted from the living room.

You spent the better part of your day cleaning the apartment and organizing Mark’s stuff. You probably threw away dozens of takeout boxes and empty beer bottles, pinching your nose at the stench they left behind.

When things seemed habitable again, you grabbed a fresh set of clothes and left the apartment, careful not to wake a sleeping Mark on the sofa.

“You don’t know how long I could stare into your picture, and wish that it was me”

After stopping by your favorite ramen place for dinner and running a few errands, you returned to your parents’ amidst the rush of traffic, looking up at the vast navy sky. It was already nearing nighttime, and you knew Felix was visiting tonight. You’d be lying if you said it wasn’t the only part of your day you were looking forward to.

You showered again, washing the smell of beer and old takeout off your skin. And you dressed up in a cuter set of pajamas this time, matching your tank top to your shorts and completing it with a silky French braid.

You were glad you had remembered to grab a few books from your nightstand at the apartment, settling down under your dimly-lit lamp to continue one you had already started.

And just past midnight, three knocks came from your window.

Felix climbed in with ease, setting a bag down on your desk and slipping off his sneakers. He looked fancier than you’d ever seen him before, light wash jeans accompanying a fitted black shirt and a leather jacket. You bit back a smile at the sight, wishing he’d owned it back when you were allowed to rip it off him.

“Hey,” he said with a smile, sounding out of breath.

“Hi,” you replied gently. “What’s with the fancy outfit?”

He chuckled. “We went to this dinner thing. I dunno, I think I just overdress wherever I go these days.”

You smiled up at him. “It looks good. Maybe overdressing is a good thing.”

“Yeah?” he said. “Maybe.”

You took your seat on the bed, resting against the headboard and crossing your legs.

“How was your day?” he asked. It reminded you of when he’d catch up on your day between hungry kisses before you got intimate. Part of you wished it was still that way.

You shrugged. “Not the best.”

“Why?” he said, furrowing his brows and sitting across from you, also cross-legged.

“Just… a lot. Back home.”

He cocked his head. “Back home? Wait so you don’t… you don’t live here anymore?”

You audibly laughed. “You thought I stayed in this dingy part of town? In this empty room? Of course not!”

“Where do you live then?”

“I’m on the south side, a little drive out from here. I just came to say hi to my parents for a bit. And to get a break from…” your voice trailed off.

“From?” he said, urging you to finish.

“From… my boyfriend.”

Felix felt his heart sink.

He knew you agreed to remain friends. He knew he had an obligation to keep things platonic. He knew how you felt about what happened before. But he still held on to a sliver of hope that you’d be single by the time he came back to visit. Wishful thinking indeed.

“Ah, boyfriend,” he said awkwardly. “That’s cool.”

You nodded. Sensing the awkward tension in the air, you changed the subject.

“What’s in the bag?”

He glanced over at it, shrugging casually. “Baked you a few things. There’s some brownies, lemon tarts and salted caramel cookies. Though I think I needed more caramel on those.”

You grinned at him, shaking your head. “You’re exactly the same. Still got a thing for baking. And spoiling people.”

He smiled back at you, a glint of sadness in his expression. “I never stopped.”

The night was spent catching up once again, you getting more glimpses into his life as an idol, and him learning all about your job and its attributes. Felix was careful not to bring up any topics that might lead back to your boyfriend, still feeling overwhelmed at the mention of one in the first place. Call it immature, but he was undeniably jealous.

Yet every time the room fell silent, his mind wandered back to that minute detail. What did he look like? What did he do for work? How often did the two of you have sex? Were you in love?

Questions he wished he could pry and get an answer to, but ones he knew would push you away. So he kept silent, engaging in surface-level conversation that hardly satisfied his need to understand you.

At half past two, you let out a yawn, feeling your eyelids getting heavy.

“Tired?” he asked, licking a cookie crumb off the tip of his thumb.

You nodded, stretching out your legs and pulling the blankets over you. You fluffed your pillow before resting a hand below your cheek and laying on it, staring up at Felix who still sat across from you.

He swallowed nervously, admiring the way your long lashes blinked up at him so innocently. He remembered that from years ago, a little move that always drove him crazy.

“You want to stay?” you asked quietly.

He swallowed again, feeling his ears get hot.

“I… don’t want to make it weird. Especially with…” his voice trailed off. He couldn’t bring himself to circle back to the boyfriend topic.

“It’s not weird. We’re friends,” you explained. “You can just take the other side and we won’t cuddle or anything.”

Felix’s heart raced at the suggestion. Though he would have preferred cuddling, even as friends, he couldn’t bring himself to decline your offer. He wanted nothing more than to hear your snores as you drifted off to sleep beside him.

“Okay,” he finally replied, removing his jacket and running a hand through his hair.

“You still have a change of clothes in the left drawer,” you said in a sleepy voice. “And your toothbrush is still in the bathroom.”

Felix successfully found the change of clothes, comfortably slipping into them and brushing his teeth with the familiar blue toothbrush you always kept for him.

When he returned, your lashes fluttered open, smiling up at the sight of him. “Cute,” you said quietly.

He felt his heartbeat quicken. There it was again- that feeling he got in the pit of his stomach when he had to remind himself to keep it platonic. Not to smother you with kisses, not to hold you while you slept. But to behave the way a friend did- one with a friend he was wildly attracted to, who also now happened to have a boyfriend.

“Thanks,” Felix said, trying his best to sound nonchalant.

He slipped into the bed next to you, pulling the blankets up to his torso and staring up at the ceiling. It was a sight he wasn’t used to, locking eyes with the white canvas above him. Normally he’d lay on his side, arms wrapped tightly around you, legs lazily hoisted over yours as he pressed little kisses to your face and whispered sweet nothings in your ear.

The feeling felt strange, unnatural, even. Like lying beside a stranger in a foreign place. Not to mention the new addition of clothes- normally, Felix would get himself cleaned up and change into a clean pair of boxers. Sometimes, he wore nothing at all. The white t-shirt and patterned shorts were among the new developments in your friendship with him.

“Need to charge my phone,” he said suddenly, sitting up and reaching for his phone from beside him.

“Would you plug mine in, too?” you said, eyes still shut as sleep began to wash over you.

He reached for yours, balancing the two phones in one hand as he made his way across the room to a spare outlet. First he plugged in his own, the little chime confirming the outlet worked. And then yours- the glow of your lockscreen making him squint against the brightness. He glanced over his shoulder at your sleeping frame, small breaths emitting from your mouth as you dozed.

A growing curiosity led him to tap the screen as it dimmed again, examining the photo set as your background.

It was a man, presumably your boyfriend, dressed in a black jacket and a snug black beanie, smiling at the camera as one slender hand gripped a spoonful of ice cream.

Felix felt his stomach churn. He carefully observed all of his features- big brown eyes, dark slanted brows and a strong, masculine jawline. He was handsome- hell, he was hot.

Felix painfully imagined the scenario that preceded the photo. First date? Second date? Hundredth date? Did he kiss you before, or after the picture was taken? Had the same spoon been used to feed you ice cream? Did you already live together at the time? What was his reaction at the photo finding a place on your lockscreen?

Felix clenched his jaw. He hoped the guy appreciated you making the photo a permanent part of your routine. The same photo you’d look at when you woke up in the morning, the same photo you’d look at right before going to sleep at night. The photo you’d see before dialing your mom or dad. The photo you’d see if Felix were to call.

As he sat observing the photo, refreshing the dimming light for a third time, a small buzz caught his attention. There on your phone, a text banner covered the guy’s face. Felix scanned it briefly, knowing he really shouldn’t be prying in your text messages like this.

Mark: Sorry about today

Felix raised an eyebrow. It must’ve been the guy on the lockscreen. A little heart emoji next to his name confirmed his suspicion. Another text came through as he finished reading.

Mark: I should’ve told u

He frowned. Told you what? What had happened before he came over tonight? Is that why you seemed upset?

Mark: Sorry for yelling. Thanks for fixing the place

Mark: I’ll explain when you get back

Mark: I don’t deserve you

Felix scoffed silently. At least he knew that much.

Mark: I still love you

And then he froze. The four words made his heart stop briefly.

He knew you’d been seeing someone new. He knew you weren’t single, and that you and him were not going to hook up. Let alone be in any form of an intimate relationship.

But he hadn’t considered that the two of you were on “I love you” terms. The thought of it made his throat dry. You were entirely in love with someone, and it wasn’t him. It was never going to be him. For a fleeting second, Felix considered leaving. There was no reason to be here- in bed, asleep next to someone he’d felt so complicated about. He’d just grab his things and disappear out the window, probably never coming to visit you again. The presence of Mark in your life would likely fill the microscopic hole that was the absence of Felix’s.

“Felix?” you said in a whisper. “Are you coming to bed?”

And he melted at the sound of your voice all over again. Giddy at the thought of being close to you again, of smelling your familiar scent and waking up next to you when Mark surely wouldn’t.

“Coming,” Felix replied. “Just letting my mom know I’ll be late tomorrow.”

And before he could think it over any further, he slipped back into bed beside you. Hands folded over his chest, staring up at the ceiling that now seemed much more inviting than the thought of leaving you to sleep alone. The picture of Mark was etched in his mind like a painful tattoo, and he winced when he remembered the texts you would wake up to.

But not before you slept beside him first, gracing his presence with your light snores and sweet scent. Something Mark wouldn’t get for at least tonight- and for that reason alone, he was satisfied.

“I dreamt I was standing in your doorstep, licking sweat off of your forehead, with your finger in my mouth, and the sound when leather jackets hit the ground”

Labored breaths escaped your parted lips as you slept, turning over in discomfort.

You’d fallen asleep hours ago, Felix following shortly after. And quickly, he found his way into your dreams.

Maybe it was the absence of intimacy between you and Mark, or maybe it was that stupid leather jacket Felix had worn tonight. Either way, your mind was clouded with images of it, painting vivid pictures of it on the floor between you.

Felix towered over you, blonde hair falling into his face as he tilted your chin up to meet his, pressing wet kisses to your lips and neck. Your hands remained at your sides, waiting for him to take the lead.

An eager hand snaked up your frame, finding its way to your mouth, where he interrupted the kiss by sliding a slender finger into your lips. You sucked obediently, never letting your eyes lose sight of his.

When you’d soaked him in your spit, he guided you backward to the bed, desperately parting your legs and inserting two fingers into your aching sex. You gripped his forearms with pleasure, moaning against his lanky figure and begging for more.

He hummed at your noises, pressing the hardness in his boxers against your core. When you gasped in response, he stood up again, running a hand through his hair as you watched him pull the waistband down lower, lower…

Your own gasps woke you up, pausing at the realization of how much you’d sweated onto your sheets. Felix was sound asleep on the pillow next to you, his chest rising and falling gently with his snores.

You glanced at the time. It was just past 3. Felix had not even been asleep for a full hour, and yet here you were having lewd visions of him fingering you in the very spot you slept. You quietly slipped out from the covers, strolling to the bathroom and shutting the door behind you.

You didn’t bother turning on the light, afraid you would wake Felix and cause him concern so late at night. Instead, you pushed aside the curtain in the bathroom window, allowing silver-blue moonlight to illuminate the room around you, observing your disheveled appearance in the mirror above the sink. Beads of sweat glued curly strands of hair to your forehead.

Still aware of the heat in your core, you pulled down your shorts, and then your panties, quietly gasping at the sight. They almost peeled away from your wetness, stringy white lines of desperation disappearing on to the soaked spot where your longing for him made itself known.

All it took was that stupid leather jacket, and here you were, almost cumming at the sight of him in dream.

You couldn’t help yourself, letting one finger circle the pool that had accumulated between your thighs. The panting began gradually, as your mind wandered back to where you’d been so rudely interrupted in your dream.

You continued the fantasy of his boxers being pulled fully down, eyebrows arched in pleasure at the thought of his cock springing out, all hard and leaky and ready for you. In consciousness you’d probably tease him, a gentle hand caressing his length as you’d coo little compliments up at him, admiring the way he could barely contain himself.

You’d bend yourself over the side of the bed, instructing him to use you, to fuck you hard, until he was satisfied. And he would, his length finding its way to your aching pussy, rubbing his wet head over your clit until you were begging to have him inside you.

You could feel yourself getting close as you fantasized when he’d slide into you, his erection stretching you out the way it did all those years ago. You’d promise with pleading in your voice that you’d let him use you whenever he wanted, however he pleased, so that you’d get used to his familiar size and shape again.

And he would smile between hard thrusts, picking up the pace as his hand would find its way to the small of your back, rubbing a thumb along your skin soothingly before leaning over and pressing a wet kiss on your shoulders.

Your moans would fill the room, saying his name like a prayer you’d repeat again and again, the four walls around you teeming with echoes of wet skin and filthy words.

And that same gentle hand would caress your throat as he found his release, this time inside of you. He’d shower you with praise the way he always did, his deep voice making your skin tingle as he pressed little kisses to your neck and ear. And you’d kiss away his tears, staying close to him until sleep called your name.

As your mind drifted back into reality, you brought a finger up, observing the way you’d made a mess of yourself right in front of the sink. You parted two fingers curiously, white cum glistening under the moonlight.

How pathetic. You’d been the one to establish boundaries again. You’d been the one who specified this was a platonic occurrence.

Yet here you were, masturbating to filthy thoughts of him while he slept in the room next door, knowing very well you had a boyfriend waiting for you back home.

After getting cleaned up, you found your way back to the bed, crawling in next to him like a guilty sinner. He turned to face you in his sleep with small breaths escaping his parted lips.

Felix looked like an angel at this time of night. But the thoughts he gave you were anything except saint-like.

Felix had to leave again in the morning, waking you up as he sat up in bed and stretched beside you.

“Felix?” you said, memories of last night flooding your head all over again. You hoped he didn’t hear you in the bathroom.

“Didn’t mean to wake you,” he replied, his raspy morning voice sending shivers down your spine. “Have to go get some stuff done today.”

You turned over so that you were facing him and stared up at him through groggy eyes.

He tucked his hair behind his ears, looking down at you and giving you a small smile. The sunlight kissed his blonde hair, setting it aglow and making it appear almost white. His eyes were puffy with exhaustion, but his smile exuded that of a restful night.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked.

You thought back to a few hours ago.

“Yeah. Better than I have in a while. You?”

He rubbed an eye, nodding. “I feel less tense.”

“Good,” you said. Maybe his dream self relieving some tension had carried over into his consciousness.

“Do you want to do something tonight?” Felix asked suddenly. “I mean, like, go somewhere? I feel bad that we’ve only been catching up at ungodly hours of the night and then I have to leave.”

You reached a hand out, playing with a loose hem on his shirt. “Yeah. That sounds nice.”

He smiled again. “Cool. I’ll pick you up at around 6? We’ll go somewhere fancy.”

You nodded, shutting your eyes again.

Without another word, he was out of the bed, pulling on his clothes from yesterday and neatly folding the pajamas before storing them back in the dresser.

“Don’t forget your jacket,” you said, giving him an amused smile as he pulled it off your desk chair and draped it over one arm.

“Oh yeah, thanks,” Felix replied.

And with a small wave he disappeared out the window again, leaving you to the vacant room with thoughts running rampant.

“I guess it’s different ‘cause you love him, but I’ve got an interactive sick and twisted imagination”

It was no use. Felix couldn’t behave like a normal functioning human when he wasn’t around you. Nor when he was around you. His mind wandered back to that photo set as your lockscreen- of Mark holding a spoonful of ice cream, looking handsome and intimate.

As he sat in the backseat of the van, his mom talking the family’s ear off about plans for his sister’s upcoming graduation, he gritted his teeth remembering the texts.

He wondered if you read them yet, and how you felt about them. Maybe you were elated to hear from Mark, traveling back to the apartment to make love to him and accept his half-assed apology. Maybe you had already broken up with him, finally realizing your true feelings for Felix and waiting up for him in bed like you used to, only this time madly in love.

Felix felt like such a loser. He could no longer deny the way he felt about you, constantly wondering what you were doing when he wasn’t around, who you were interacting with, and how often you thought of him. He’d give anything to crawl around in your mind and find out how you felt about him now that things were this different. He probably would’ve snooped through your phone last night if it wasn’t locked, to find a trace of him, and come to the absurd conclusion that you wanted him just as badly as he wanted you.

Felix glanced down at his phone, opening Instagram for the millionth time today and clicking on your user. You didn’t use it much, but the 18 little squares did provide a window into your life without Felix, and he hated it.

He hated to see you in a short dress at a club he wasn’t aware of. Hated to see your graduation photos, ones he wished he would’ve received when they were taken.

Hated to see the pictures you had with Mark. One whole carousel dedicated to him, ten random photos you selected for a birthday post. A selfie of the two of you in bed, a funny picture of him wearing a face mask, a photo from when he let you make little braids in his hair and posed for you. And another photo from that same ice cream date, a different angle, but just as handsome and intimate as the first time.

Felix clicked on all the same photos, reading the captions over again, stalking users from the comment sections and piecing together who they were in relation to you. But it was no use. No amount of obsessive stalking was going to make you like him. You had a life without him, beyond what you had five years ago. You’d been right about that.

Felix sighed, locking his phone again and thinking back to last night. He’d been so ecstatic to spend the night by your side again. It felt like home. He felt safe.

He hoped you didn’t notice the erection that troubled him early into the night. He’d been forced to focus on his breathing patterns, moving as far away from you as possible to not get aroused by your sleeping figure. He remembered you getting up at some point, a brief interval of time which he felt empty and exposed without you in your bed. When you’d returned, he felt his heart could burst, suddenly overjoyed at the reminder that you were here beside him in your bed. And that it would remain that way until morning broke. Each passing minute worried him, and he so badly wished he could freeze time and stay with you in your bed forever.

“Felix?” a voice interrupted. He snapped his head up to the mirror, humming in response to his mom.

“Should we coordinate so you can stay at the cabin with us? Or do you want your own room?”

His sister’s graduation. She’d planned a few days with her friends to stay by the lake, and most of Felix’s family would be at the neighboring cabin.

“Oh, uh… I dunno, I was planning something with a few friends.”

“That’s okay,” she responded. “I know you have a lot you wanted to do.”

Her voice trailed back to the topic of their plans, and Felix’s mind wandered back to you. His family being away meant he had you to himself for a few days, and he wouldn’t have to leave you in the mornings. He bit back a smile at the thought of staying in bed with you all day. Even just as friends.

But the change of plans meant he had to organize something special tonight. Dinner? A movie? The two of you seldom saw movies together back then, always leaving 20 minutes in to go get busy in his car. He wasn’t even sure if you still liked all the same restaurants.

But he did have one thing in mind, and he hoped it would help you forget all about Mark.

When you woke for a second time, it was well past 11. You rubbed your eyes of sleep, surprised at how tired you’d been all week. Last night’s events really relieved your stress- maybe a little too much.

You made your way to your phone, several notifications catching your eye.

Ten total texts from Mark, a few from last night, the last one being just an hour ago.

Mark: Call me when you can

Mark: I want to talk

Mark: Can you come over at all?

Mark: Sorry

You furrowed your brows, the texts ringing several alarms in your head. The constant apologies, the urgency to speak with you. The fight hadn’t been that bad, right? Did you remember it differently?

And one from Felix, who seldom texted you. The two of you were still getting acquainted with speaking through little messages like this- you didn’t have to in the past because you were always together. Phone calls were your preferred method of communicating with him if anything, but his texts were always so innocent, and knowing he was thinking of you made you smile.

Felix: 🐣

The little emoji made you giggle, momentarily forgetting about Mark’s eagerness to speak with you. You shot him back a little emoji in response, settling on the sun, representative of both the day outside and his presence in your life. Sunshine.

You put your phone face down on the bed again, gathering your clothes and toiletries for a shower. You had to go see Mark, and something told you it was going to be a long, long conversation.

After a quick shower and some breakfast, (or lunch, rather), you were off to see Mark again.

The apartment was beginning to look messy all over again. There were more takeout boxes sprawled along the counter, random belongings on the dining table and dishes stacked on the coffee table.

“Mark?” you called out.

“In the bedroom,” he shouted back, a somber tone in his voice.

You kicked off your shoes and followed to your shared room, and the state of it confused you.

His clothes, stacked high on the bed, some hung neatly on hangers and some folded. His collection of sneakers, piled in one corner, along with his belts and hats. And miscellaneous paraphernalia that belonged to him- journals, briefcases, mementos.

“Mark?” you said, taking in the sight.

He looked up at you, pulling his lips in a thin line. He looked as though he’d been crying.

“Sit,” he said plainly. You complied.

Before he said anything, he let out a heavy sigh, scratching the back of his head.

“I never meant for you to find out like this,” Mark said.

You waited for him to continue.

“I just… things were hard. And I guess it was hard to come to you about it, because you always have your shit together.”

You twiddled your thumbs together nervously, “You’re leaving, aren’t you?”

He looked behind him at the pile of clothes. “I didn’t think you’d want me around anymore.”

You turned to look at him, a little angry at him for jumping to conclusions like this. “I’ve done nothing but care for you. You’ve been here at some of my lowest points. Why do you discredit me when I’m here for yours?”

He looked at the floor, saying nothing.

“I mean for god’s sake Mark, not telling me about your job is one thing. But you’re going to act like I’m the bad guy for needing a little space when we’re going through a rough patch? I let you have the place for a bit, doesn’t mean I’m not coming back for you. I love you and you know that.”

He swallowed. “I just don’t know how we’re supposed to come back from this.”

“Come back from what, you drinking here and there to cope? A small argument we had last night?”

“Me sleeping with my lab partner,” Mark blurted out.

You fell silent. A wave of shock washed over you, and then distress. Your throat went dry, your eyes trembling with tears prematurely.

“You what?” you asked, your voice coming out in a whisper.

Mark hung his head. “I thought you knew.”

“No I didn’t fucking know! Jesus, Mark! How long has this been going on?” The tears began to fall, staining your face with mascara.

“Four months,” he answered. Mark didn’t cry, nor did he raise his voice. It was a casual confession, like he’d been waiting to tell you all this time.

Mark hadn’t even been out of a job four months ago. The cheating had begun when you two were still on good terms. Or so you’d thought.

You nodded, silent sobs escaping your lips. Mark watched you with a guilt-ridden expression, knowing that this was it.

“Okay,” you said, standing up from the bed and slinging your purse over your shoulder.

He stood up too, observing your face. “I’ll be out by the time you’re back. I already arranged for my stuff to be picked up.”

His nonchalant tone angered you. You wanted to scream, to hit him and try anything to make him stay. But the truth was, you’d already lost Mark a long time ago.

The two of you had been nothing but strangers in a joint bedroom, pretending nothing had gone awry, when in actuality, your feelings were just as convoluted as his. Maybe it was the stress of your job, or the existence of a routine that drove you crazy most days. Either way, you hadn’t been happy with him for a long time. The same rang true for Mark.

“Can I ask you something?” You said before leaving.

He paused with baited breath.

“Why did you act like I was the one who threw this all away?”

He hung his head again. “Like I said before. It was hard to come to you about it. You always have your shit together. You always know what you want. And I think…” his voice trailed off. You raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to finish.

“I think your heart might be elsewhere too.”

It was your turn to shift to an expression of guilt. Had he known all this time? About your complex feelings? About Felix coming back, and your nights with him, albeit nothing intimate?

Though you wanted to defend yourself, you couldn’t. Instead, you pursed your lips together, nodding reluctantly in silence.

“I’ll be back in a few days,” you said. “Can we grab a coffee or something soon?”

Mark’s expression softened. He took a step forward, opening his arms for a hug, which you stepped into. His hugs, always so familiar- the scent of his cedar cologne and the firmness of his arms always felt like home. Or at least they did until this point of your life- maybe your chapter in this apartment with Mark was finally at a close.

“Of course we can,” he said, his voice muffled into your tear-stained shoulder.

And there you stood, basking in the last fragments of the place you’d called home for so long.

“Do you like these little sonnets? ‘Cause I wrote them just for you”

In all honesty, the last thing you wanted to do was go out tonight. You’d spent the afternoon crying in your room, grieving the last few days you had with Mark. He’d been a steady part of your adult life for as long as you’d known it, and suddenly, he just… wasn’t anymore.

You wanted to call him and ask if he was still seeing the girl he’d cheated with. A part of you wanted to hate him, but the other part just wanted him to be happy. Maybe this adult life was something you needed to navigate away from each other now. Maybe this routine wasn’t healthy for either of you. Since your freshman year of college, Mark was all you’d ever known. You hadn’t slept with anyone else, hadn’t dated anyone else, and hadn’t really met other men aside from his friends. But the thought of navigating the future without him was petrifying.

On the other hand, you longed for the uncertainty. You wanted to have the freedom to go out and come home late, not having to worry about anyone waiting up for you. You wanted to discover new things about yourself, see the world, and make your own coffee at night when you worked. It’s not that you didn’t appreciate everything Mark did for you in that sense, but when incorporated into the repetitive routine of adulthood, they had lost meaning to both of you. Maybe that’s why Mark sought something else in another woman.

And maybe that’s why you couldn’t push Felix away anymore.

You weren’t sure about any of it. But you did know Mark seemed to have a weight off his shoulders. And you did know sleeping next to Felix felt… right. It felt safe again. It felt like home.

You packed a few of your nicer clothes from the apartment, trying on variations of them in the bathroom mirror back at your parents’ house.

Felix had called briefly to tell you to wear something that would match his black suit, and you were intrigued by the amusement in his voice. But you also faked your excitement on the phone, trying your best to hold back tears and sniffles.

So you settled on a silky maroon dress, the draped neckline accentuating the curve of your breasts and hugging your waist like it was tailored to you. A pair of black heels complemented your dress, and you felt sexy for the first time in a while.

Felix called you when he arrived, almost on the dot.

“I’m here,” he said. “Do you want me to go up? Or- are you parents home? I should probably say hi.”

You giggled at his nervousness. Just about anything made Felix nervous. He was an over thinker at heart.

“I’ll meet you out there,” you said.

As you adjusted your earrings in the mirror, a wave of sadness washed over you again. It had been this very dress that you’d worn when Mark was a guest speaker at your school’s biology department. He loved the color on you- even made sure he snapped a few photos of you in it before tearing it off between kisses.

You shook your head, ridding yourself of the memories, and tried your best to remind yourself that tonight was for fun. You needed a night to get your mind off things, to think of something other than your job and Mark.

You made your way outside, and Felix stepped out from the driver’s seat, hands folded behind his back nervously. You locked up behind you and carefully started toward the car, Felix jogging up to meet you halfway.

“Wow…” he said, staring at you in wonder.

You chuckled, feeling a blush rise in your cheeks.

“You look…” he started, losing track of his words as his eyes locked with yours.

He brought two fingers up to his neck, discreetly checking for a pulse as you smiled at him. It was a habit he’d done since he was young- an even cuter one considering he always thought you’d never noticed.

“You look very pretty,” he finished, a twinkle in his eyes as he spoke.

“Thanks,” you replied. “You look very handsome.”

Felix checked for a pulse again, playing it off as an itch on the crook of his neck.

“Ready?” you asked as he stood in silence.

“Yeah,” Felix replied, trying his best to snap out of the trance he was in.

The two of you made your way to the car, Felix holding the door for you, and sat quietly for a moment while he confirmed the address on his phone.

“Where are we going?” You asked. He only smiled at you.

“It’s a surprise.”

Once he started the GPS, the two of you chatted the whole drive, exchanging stories about your families and friends. Felix told you about his sister’s graduation party, and that he would have the place to himself for a few days. Doing his best to slip in a casual invitation for you to spend the night. (Platonically, of course.)

You told him all about what your own graduation was like- down to the hangover you had after clubbing for 13 hours straight. Felix couldn’t help but wonder where Mark fit into your story.

The drive was much like they used to be. Aside from the steamy moments you used to share, conversations were always the most fun part about being around Felix. He always had something new to tell you, little tales that kept you on your feet and drew you even closer to him. It seemed that after five long years, you could finally reciprocate with your own fascinating anecdotes.

Before you knew it, the two of you had arrived at a hotel, finding a parking spot in the garage below. You stepped out and looked around, wrapping your arms around yourself and inhaling the cool breeze.

“Cold?” Felix asked, and you shook your head.

“Feels nice, actually.”

You linked arms with him as he led you into the building and to the elevator, where another elegant looking man pressed the up button for the two of you. A little bell chime indicated it was at your level, the double doors opening slowly in front of you. Felix ushered you in first, following carefully behind you and pressing the silver circle marked ‘R’.

As the elevator began, it jerked with force, causing you to gasp and grip the bar to the left of you. Felix moved closer to you, placing a gentle hand on your waist as the ride continued. You felt goosebumps form on your skin at his touch, remembering all too well how it had felt back then. It still made your heart race.

When you arrived, the double doors slid open again, and you gasped at the view in front of you. It was a rooftop restaurant overlooking the city, thousands of little buildings below you glowing like stars in the night sky. The tables were neatly lined with white tablecloths and candles. And the best part? The rooftop was empty, aside from a waiter who politely gestured to the table nearest the ledge. You bowed graciously as he led the way and poured you both a glass of champagne, placing two menus on the table before he left.

As you stared awestruck at the skyline, Felix’s gaze remained locked on your gentle expression. His heart raced watching you smile, eyes twinkling with reflections of the city he called home.

“Do you like it?” He asked.

“Like it?” You repeated. “Felix, it’s so beautiful up here... How’d you even find this place?” You turned to look at him and he glanced down nervously at the menu, feeling his heart might burst with affection.

“Heard of it through a friend.”

He wasn’t going to tell you the truth of course- that he spent nearly two hours of his day in the backseat of his parents’ van googling romantic dinner locations in the city. Calling up 14 in total for a last minute reservation, eventually convincing his manager to have them clear the reservation list so you’d have the privacy you deserved. Which he paid extra for- along with the private parking spot, a table closest to the ledge, and the specialty request champagne.

“Raspberries?” You said curiously, taking a sip of the sparkling beverage. A raspberry champagne cocktail on ice- a recipe Felix found online and personally requested.

“Wow, you have to try the champagne,” you told Felix, eyes glimmering at the heavenly flavor. He knew you’d like it.

When the waiter came back to your table, Felix ordered you both a mutual favorite of chicken risotto, handing your menus to the waiter and turning back to you with a shy smile.

“What?” You asked playfully.

He giggled. “Nothing. It’s just nice to be here with you.”

You nodded, taking another sip of champagne. Of course, memories of your day with Mark still plagued your mind. You didn’t want to give Felix the wrong idea considering you were still going through a rough patch, unsure of what the future even held for the two of you. Keep it casual, you reminded yourself.

“It is nice,” you said. “I needed an outing like this with my best friend.”

Felix’s smile faded a little, reaching for his own glass of champagne and taking a big sip. He cleared his throat, his coughing getting louder as he set the glass down.

“Are you okay?” You asked.

He nodded with flushed cheeks and watery eyes. “Raspberry. Got stuck in my throat.”

You slid him a napkin and he wiped his mouth of the pink residue, turning away to not embarrass himself further.

“Do you want me to get you a glass of water?” You asked with concern in your voice.

“I’ll do it,” he said quickly, standing up from the table. I’m doing so, he bumped his knee on the edge, knocking his glass over and staining the white tablecloth.

“Fuck,” Felix said angrily. “Shit.”

You placed the glass upright again. “It’s okay, we can just remove the tablecloth.” You glanced around the rooftop for the waiter who’d been away at the kitchen.

Felix piled the cutlery with shaky hands, dropping a fork with a loud clang as he scrambled to remove the tablecloth. You noticed his shakiness and reached out to place a hand gently over his own. He stopped to look at you with wide eyes.

“Felix,” you said. “Breathe.”

He took a deep breath and blinked a few times at you.

“Sorry,” Felix said, embarrassment evident in his voice. “It’s been a while since…” his voice trailed off, knowing he wasn’t allowed to refer to this as a date.

“It’s okay,” you said. “It’s just me.”

Just you, Felix thought. Just the woman he’d been fawning over for years. Just the woman he hadn’t forgotten once in the span of his new life. The woman he looked for in everyone, in everything. The woman he couldn’t form sentences around or stop stumbling over himself.

“Just you” was the problem.

Felix sat down across from you again, and the waiter returned with your food, placing it on the bare wooden table with a questioning look. Felix sheepishly handed him the strained tablecloth.

Felix’s nervousness had always been charming to you. You couldn’t help but smile at the way he’d display those same mannerisms from years ago, desperate to look “cool”, and being anything but in the process.

“What?” Felix asked you this time, cutting into his chicken.

“Nothing,” you said. “I think it’s better without the tablecloth anyway.”

He huffed out a laugh. “It was a little overkill.”

“Oh, definitely. In fact, they should’ve swapped our table for one of those plastic outdoor ones. Those are peak fine dining. Or maybe those cheeseburger stools from McDonald’s? Now that would’ve been impressive.”

Felix laughed loudly, and you joined him, watching as his shoulders relaxed with every movement.

As the night progressed, Felix seemed a lot more comfortable, finally coming around to the idea of having dinner with his best friend- nothing more. Memories of Mark tainted your mind when the night fell silent, and the images of him were still burned into Felix’s mind. But you both embraced the night with open arms, like you were the only two who existed in this timeline- the way it was when you were just kids.

At the end of the night, you got up to get a better look at the view. Felix followed, snapping a few photos and dragging you into one for a selfie in front of the skyline.

You wrapped your arms around yourself, admiring the way everything looked so small from up here. So insignificant, so fleeting. Like your life was a city, and every building was just a small part of it, no matter how big it seemed from down there.

“See there?” You said, pointing at the south side. “That’s where my apartment is.”

Felix looked out, squinting at the horizon.

“And there,” you said, pointing in another direction. “Is where my university was.”

From the corner of your eye, you could tell Felix wasn’t looking at the skyline anymore. He had his gaze locked on you, carefully observing the way your hair flowed in the gentle night time breeze. Two fingers worked their way up to check his pulse again- still breathing.

You didn’t look back at him. Instead, you studied the way the city seemed to change by the minute. Planes with flashing lights flickering in thick fog, cars that drove by in the blink of an eye. Offices still with their lights on, apartments and houses already asleep for the night. It was all so changing- so uncertain. You could take pictures just seconds apart and it’d be the same place, but never the exact same moment in time.

“Want to get going?” You asked, still aware of his eyes on you.

“Yeah,” Felix said quietly. He wasn’t sure what he’d been hoping for, but he felt briefly disappointed.

You finally turned to him, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear and smiling at him. “Come on then.”

Felix led you down the stairs to the elevator, where you both entered, and he pushed a silver circle marked 17.

You cocked your head in confusion. “Isn’t it the garage level?”

A knowing smile met your confused expression. “I booked us a room for the night.”

It was the last of Felix’s surprises- one he knew you’d be excited about. Similarly, one he hoped wouldn’t overstep his boundaries. Fancy hotel rooms were something the two of you only dreamt of in the past, joking about how you’d order one of everything from room service and sleep in everyday till noon. Along with a list of other things you always wanted to try, but he knew very well that was no longer a part of the plan. He didn’t mind, simply wanting to spend a night by your side in a room that wasn’t your childhood bedroom. Now that he could afford it, he’d make sure you experienced everything you once wanted to.

“Felix…” you began. “This is too much.”

He shook his head nonchalantly. “It’s a little day trip. You don’t work tomorrow and my family’s out for the weekend. Might as well stay while we’re here.”

The elevator stopped at your floor and you got off, following his strut down the hall as he found your room. He pulled a white card out from the pocket of his suit, scanning it and pushing the door open with ease.

“Come on,” he said, gesturing for you to follow him.

The sweet scent of vanilla and sandalwood filled the room all around you in an instant. You gasped at the sight of tall clear windows that overlooked the same skyline view you had at dinner. Two massive beds occupied the middle of the room that connected to a single bathroom.

“What about our stuff?” You said suddenly, unable to imagine sleeping in this gown.

“The staff’s already on their way up with our bags. You don’t have to worry about that.”

Felix sat on the edge of the bed, arms rested behind him. You made your way over to him, sitting opposite him on your own bed, unable to speak.

“I… I don’t even know what to say.”

He chuckled. “You don’t have to say anything. I just wanted to do something fun for my best friend.”

“Thank you,” you said. “Seriously- thank you. This has been the best surprise after such a… shitty week. I really needed this.”

“I’m glad,” Felix replied. “That was my plan.” He laid back on the white duvet, spreading his limbs out along the surface. “Now can we please order some dessert from room service?”

“We wanna talk about sex but we’re not allowed”

“Solid 6/10.”

“What?” You replied. “No way.”

“Way,” Felix replied. “The vanilla tastes… bitter.”

“Bitter? Are we eating the same thing?”

“Crème brûlée. Bitter crème brûlée.” He remarked.

You laughed, setting down your fork.

“Okay, last one.” You lifted the silver dome cover off the last plate, revealing a single slice of cheesecake.

“Now this one I’m judging harshly,” Felix said.

“You judged all of them harshly!” You said jokingly.

“Touché.”

“Ready? One, two, three…” you popped a forkful in your mouth, chewing for a moment before nodding. “That’s the single best slice of cheesecake I’ve ever had.”

“No way,” Felix said.

“Way,” you replied.

You handed the fork back to Felix, who took a bite of his own, thinking it over for a second. “8/10.”

“What! You’re just being cocky now.”

“Mine is better! You can’t deny that.”

“Mmm I’m not so sure.”

In a fit of laughter, you laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling and shutting your eyes briefly. “I can’t believe we’re here.”

You turned your head to face the view again, speckles of city lights gleaming from beyond the tall glass windows.

“It’s something, huh?” Felix said.

“Mhmm. This was one of our bucket list items from that summer.”

Felix felt his heartbeat quicken, surprised you brought up the topic of that summer at all. He’d wanted to talk about it for so long, not being able to with your new established dynamic.

“Yeah,” he said. “I remember.”

“What’d we plan again? Dessert from the room service menu, steal the amenities? Sleep on silk sheets?”

He looked at you nervously, waiting for you to say it. Something- anything at all to prove you remembered.

Have sex in the jacuzzi, Felix thought to himself. Fuck on the balcony. Do it in the middle of the night and try not to wake the neighboring rooms.

“Yeah,” he settled on replying. “Think you got everything.”

You sat up again, making your way over to your suitcase and digging out your toothbrush out from the pile of clothes. “Gonna brush,” you said.

Felix followed, sharing the sink space with you as you brushed your teeth in front of the large mirror.

He wore a simple white shirt and blue flannel pants, you much more exposed in white cotton shorts and a tank top. Felix’s eyes darted briefly to your body and then back at your reflection in the mirror, and you suddenly felt much more aware of your appearance.

When you finished, you crawled under the duvet again and enveloped yourself in the thick white sheets. You turned to face Felix, who climbed into his own bed across from you.

“Thank you,” you said to him again. “For tonight.”

Felix nodded nervously. “You deserve it.”

And sleep washed over you quickly.

“So how should I begin this? I guess it started when you were with him”

Felix hadn’t slept at all- in fact, he spent a good portion of the night facing you and letting the steady sound of your breathing fill the room. Rather he couldn’t sleep, unable to contain the growing bulge in his pants at the sight of your figure.

He felt like such a loser again, his mind going back to summer when you made all those plans for a hotel room. And yet here he was, sleeping a few feet away from you in his own bed, having unholy thoughts about someone with a boyfriend. It was an unprecedented level of pathetic he felt.

Trying his best not to wake you, he slipped out from the covers, tip-toeing his way to the bathroom. At least he could get some relief in there and maybe get some shut-eye.

But his efforts were futile, waking you up as soon as he took the first steps toward you.

“Felix?” You called out.

“Sorry,” he responded quickly, awkwardly bending over to hide his crotch. “I couldn’t sleep. Was gonna get a drink of water.”

You smiled sympathetically, patting the bed next to you. “Get in,” you said politely. He panicked.

You’d surely find out about the ongoing incident if he complied. But selfishly, he wanted to, hoping that being closer to you would help it die down. A dense thought process, that’s for sure.

So he obeyed, pulling his t-shirt down and slipping under the sheets so fast you couldn’t possibly have noticed in this darkness. You turned to face him, finally being able to see his face at this proximity. And for a minute, the two of you said nothing, gazing at each other under the dim glow of the city lights outside.

You can’t remember who initiated it first, thinking it might’ve very well been you, who scooted closer and kissed him.

Felix shut his eyes instinctively, like he knew this was going to happen. But the fact was, he didn’t. His heartbeat raced at a concerning speed now, head dizzy with thoughts. Still, he said nothing. Asked nothing. He just stayed there, kissing you back like his life depended on it.

A tender hand found its way to your cheek, where he brushed a strand of your hair aside to place little kisses along your face. In doing so, he moved even closer, accidentally brushing his waist against your thigh.

“Fuck,” Felix said while pulling away. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”

He was rock hard now, head spinning with the reminder of how you tasted and breathed against him like this.

You hoisted yourself up, looking down at his fearful expression. But you didn’t say anything in response, instead leaning down to kiss him again. His kisses were more desperate this time, little moans escaping into your mouth as you ran your tongue along his bottom lip. You pulled away again for a breath, and Felix panicked thinking you might leave or stop.

This time however, you climbed over his delicate frame, straddling his waist as he sat up and rested his back against the headboard. His crotch pressed against you eagerly, but you stayed there for an excruciating few minutes, running a hand over his chest and into his blonde locks.

“Blonde…” you said in an amused tone.

You traced his freckles with a single finger, sliding down to graze over the slope of his nose and then over his plump, needy lips.

“Please…” Felix whispered as you leaned in to kiss him. “Please,” he said again between soft kisses. “Please, please, please…”

His usually deep voice was much higher in pitch when he was this needy, and you’d never heard it this way before.

“Mmm. Please what?” You said against his wet lips. He hesitated for a moment.

“Please… use me…” he said shyly, a twinge of desperation as his breath hitched in his throat. His hips rocked gently against yours, reluctant hands finding their way down to your waist.

The friction made you moan softly against him, and it was your turn to kiss him with longing. You wasted no more time reaching a hand between the two of you to pull off his pants as he slid your shorts down. You wrapped your legs around his torso in just your panties, clothed cock pressed firmly against your growing wetness, and he groaned in frustration.

“Fuck…” he breathed out. “Don’t move or I might finish.”

You smiled between gentle kisses to his collarbones. Knowing he wasn’t exaggerating about finishing prematurely, you finally pulled his boxers down, wrapping one hand around his length and moving up and down.

“Ah…” Felix struggled against your touch.

“What’s wrong?” You cooed sweetly. “Gonna finish?”

He nodded with his eyes squeezed shut tightly.

“That’s okay,” you said with a smile. “You can cum if you want to.”

“I don’t… ah…”

And with a scrunched nose, he found his release, making a mess all over his stomach between you.

“Fuck,” Felix said. “I didn’t want to finish yet. Sorry.” His eyes were teary and spaced out as he caught his breath.

You circled the strings of liquid with your index finger, dipping into his navel to gather some on the tips of your fingers.

“That’s okay,” you said calmly, bending down to kiss him again. “I didn’t say I was done using you.”

Felix swallowed nervously, trying his best to hold back the inevitable tears.

“You okay to give me one more?” You said, sliding your hand down between your legs to play with yourself. You circled your clit with his cum, gasping in pleasure at the warm sensation.

Tears fell from his face as he nodded and waited for your instruction.

“Good,” you said, kissing away his tears as you continued to touch yourself. “Tell me if you want to stop, okay?”

Felix nodded nervously, watching intently as you finally removed your panties and spread further to take all of him. With gentle movements, you wrapped your arms around his neck, positioning over him and sliding down ever so slowly. His hands gripped your waist as he helped fill you up.

It was a sensation Felix hadn’t been prepared for. He winced at the overstimulation, trying his best to remain semi-hard so you’d have a chance to finish. But the feeling of you gently bouncing on his cock made him cry even more, desperate to help you find your release and to hear you shower him with praise.

“Doing so good,” you told him between breathless movements. “Kiss me.”

He obeyed, planting sloppy tear-stained kisses on your mouth as you used him for your own pleasure. He pulled away again, mouth finding its way to your breasts, where he kissed and sucked your nipples with fondness.

And between his fervent kisses in the valley of your breasts, you found your own release, clutching his shoulders as you trembled and dribbled cum all over his length.

You slid off of him with ease and back onto the bed, where you both took a minute to catch your breath. Felix was unsure of what to say, and you could hardly form a sentence.

Instead you got dressed again and sat up to go to the bathroom. “Gonna get cleaned up,” you said simply.

As you stood, Felix gripped your wrist, pulling you toward him again. “Don’t leave,” he said in a frightened tone.

“I just need tissues,” you explained.

“Don’t leave,” he said again, tears trickling down his face.

“Felix, I’m just-”

“I’m in love with you,” Felix blurted out.

Your heart raced and you took a deep breath. You stood between his legs observing the way he now let out dramatic sobs as he began to speak.

“I’m so fucking in love with you and I can’t help it. I’ve always loved you. Ever since we were kids. You can hold me and comfort me until I stop crying but it’s not gonna change the fact that I’m crying because I love you.”

You reached a hand up, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. He continued talking as he cried, the stream of consciousness giving him the confidence he’d always yearned to utilize.

“I tried. I tried for so long with other girls, with other people. It was never the same. I thought there was something wrong with me because I’d cry so much whenever I was with you. And it never happened with anyone else. It took me years and some stupid hookups before I realized it was because I was always in love with you.

That’s why I came back. You make me feel so damn safe all the time. I can’t taste Oreo mcflurries or raspberry chapstick without thinking of you first. I would’ve still been in love with you if you kept ignoring me. I’m still in love with you even though you have him. And I don’t know what we’re doing, but I do know that I’m in love with you. Back then, and now, and in five years time.”

He hung his head in shame, crying like a guilty child, and you towered over him in silence. He’d never felt so vulnerable before, crying in front of the girl he loved in complete nudity.

Part of you knew this was coming- there was no denying Felix hadn’t been the most inconspicuous about his romantic feelings toward you since returning. But you couldn’t find the words to say to him, knowing anything you could say right now was only going to hurt him. You and Mark weren’t technically broken up yet, and your heart largely remained there still. You and Felix also led two completely different lives- yours, a monotonous adult routine, and his, riddled with fame and splendor. It was never going to work the way he wanted it to. This was all a fleeting thing like it had been back then- this wasn’t reality.

“Please say something,” Felix pleaded.

“I’m sorry,” you said quietly. “We shouldn’t have done this.”

He looked up at you through tears, hardly making out the expression on your face as the room blurred around him. And with a simple nod, he understood. You were not in love with Felix.

With a gentle release of your wrists, he allowed you to get cleaned up, crying in front of the bathroom mirror as you rid yourself of his traces. When you returned, Felix was back in his own bed, lying on his side away from you.

Not so much as a sniffle was heard as you turned out the light again, falling asleep to his words replaying in your head like a broken record.

“Did he ever make you cum? Did he ever make you cry?”

You were up early that morning, quick to shower last night’s mistake off your aching body. Felix stayed in bed facing the window, forcing himself to keep his eyes shut though he wasn’t asleep. His eyes could hardly pry themselves open anyway, now swollen and red from all the crying he’d done.

When you finished getting dressed, you sat on the edge of your bed, staring out at the view in the daytime. The city was completely different at this time of day. People looked like little ants from this high up, and you followed their paths as they navigated the world below. Into stores, apartment buildings, even meeting for coffee. It was so human- so unpredictable where the next little ant would find themselves. So uncertain.

You heard Felix shuffle about in bed, and you decided to go check on him for the first time, holding your breath as you made your way to his side.

“Felix,” you said timidly. “You should eat something.”

He kept his eyes shut, furrowing his brows into a frown as he felt your hand run through his hair.

“Not hungry,” he said in a raspy voice.

“Come on,” you replied. “Checkout’s at 11. We’ve only got two hours to enjoy this view before we have to leave.”

Felix fluttered one eye open, looking at you for the first time since last night. His heart pained him all over again. Your hair was still damp from your shower, face free of makeup and the lingering scent of peaches on your skin.

He exhaled through his nose, eyes wandering past you and zoning out.

And then with some hesitation, you crawled into the unmade bed beside him, slipping under the covers and wrapping an arm around him the way you always used to. You held him like that for a minute, rubbing his arm soothingly and playing with the back of his hair.

Felix couldn’t feel excited about any of it, too heartbroken to feel anything but sorrow in your arms now. Tears brimmed his eyes again as you lulled him into another wave of sleepiness.

“Do you love him?” Felix broke the silence suddenly. You swallowed, finally choosing to be honest with him. It was the least you could do while he grieved.

“Yeah. I do.”

“Does he… satisfy you?” Felix asked. You were taken aback at the question, and Felix was shocked that he brought it up. But he needed closure right now. He needed answers to the questions he’d been overthinking all week.

“Mhm.”

He thought for a second. “Does he ever make you cry?”

It was your turn to think for a minute. “Sometimes. When we fight, I guess. It’s not often, though.”

Felix shut his eyes again, wanting to ask more questions, but feeling too tired and anguished. You continued massaging his arm, feeling his tension loosen in your touch.

“Go back to sleep,” you said finally. “I’ll wake you when it’s time to check out.”

And he did, dozing off properly in your tender embrace.

When you parted ways that day, Felix knew very well he might never see you again.

He’d messed things up by confessing how he felt, only to be met with what he’d feared all along- you were indeed in love with Mark. There was never a chance that the two of you would work out. Still, the truth pained him. The dull ache in his chest was made worse by the way you cared for him, giving his hand a little squeeze in the car and rubbing his back when he pulled you in for one last hug. He knew you were just trying to make him feel better. But deep down he was angry- at himself for not staying, at Mark for being able to call you his, even at you for being intimate with him last night. He didn’t regret it, but he did wish it ended the way he’d hoped it to.

On the drive home, Felix had the realization that things were now different. His feelings were out there in the open, and you were free to do whatever you wanted with them. Regardless of how you felt, it meant things between you were going to change.

He was no longer welcome to sneak into your room late at night- even as friends. He couldn’t bake you little surprises or text you at random times throughout the day. And the idea of ever kissing you again was just a distant daydream, so far out of reach it seemed like something that had never occurred in the first place.

He wondered how you felt about the situation. And he wondered if you knew how terribly he regretted it. In an alternate universe, Felix had just let you go get cleaned up and cuddled you to sleep, pushing away the idea that you had cheated on your partner. It would have been a fleeting thing like it had always been. Like it was always supposed to be. A lingering thought made Felix consider calling you up to ask why you’d cheated on Mark if you loved him, but that would involve talking to you.

What he didn’t know, of course, is that you weren’t in love with Mark anymore.

“I hope we’re still friends, yeah I hope you don’t mind”

Standing in the living room you two shared, Mark wrapped up the last of his boxes with tape and looked over at you. The room had never felt this empty without his video game consoles or his sneakers lying around carelessly.

“If I forget anything I’ll come by to pick it up later this week,” he said. “But that’s the most of it.”

You wiped a few stray tears. “Where are you going again?”

“I told you,” Mark said, sitting on the couch next to you and resting a hand on your thigh. “Couple friends have a room for rent just an hour from here. It’s safe. I don’t want you to worry.”

He reached up to wipe a tear with his thumb lovingly. You missed these moments- sitting on the couch together like this, only now they were tainted with heartbreak and mourning what once was.

“Is she going to be there?” You asked after a moment.

Mark looked down, and then back up at your face. “Do you remember when I had blue hair?” He asked suddenly.

“What?”

“The blue hair. Arctic fresh, like you used to call it.”

You chuckled a little. That term had slipped your mind after graduation.

“Yeah. I remember.”

“And you used to sit in the library all day.”

“Until you started stalking me.”

“Don’t act like you didn’t love it!” Mark retorted. The two of you laughed for a bit, and you almost forgot you were sad in the first place.

“I didn’t know when you were gonna be there,” Mark continued. “I had no clue how to approach you. Hell, I didn't even know what kind of person you were gonna be.”

You listened to him as gestured with his hands.

“That uncertainty- there was something so fun about it.”

There was that word again- one that had been on your mind lately. A lot of things felt uncertain as of right now.

“Remember when we didn’t have a mattress?”

You shook your head. “God. Don’t remind me.” Mark laughed in response.

“We used jackets as blankets! It was fun though, wasn’t it? We thought we’d never finish furnishing the place. I kinda loved not knowing what it was going to look like yet.”

You pondered his words carefully. There was a lot of truth in them- the months you spent sleeping on the floor and eating microwave pizzas together for dinner were some of your most memorable times. You only got through it because you had hope that the future would make up for those nights.

“You seemed happier too,” Mark said. “And I want you to be that happy all the time. I don’t want you to be scared of the future.”

You began to cry again, trembling as Mark pulled you in for a hug.

“I don’t know how to do this without you,” you said. “This… routine. Being an adult.”

“You’ve always known how,” Mark said. “You just have to go live it. Don’t let yourself get stuck at a computer all day. Don’t let the only time you leave the house be to get coffee creamer at night.”

You smiled at him sheepishly.

“I’m learning too,” Mark said. “I kinda want to get out of this city. Get a new job.”

You nodded.

“And I want you to do some badass things,” he said, poking your knee and making you smile. “I want to hear all about them. But you gotta do them first!”

With a gentle sigh, you nodded again.

Mark twiddled his fingers for a moment.

“It’s him, isn’t it?”

“What?” You said, head snapping up to look at him.

“Dude from the band.”

Your heart sped up, unsure of what to say.

“I tried your parents’ house a few days ago. Two of you were headed out somewhere. Can’t believe I even recognized him, but I pieced it together.”

“Why… I mean-”

“Doesn’t matter,” he said with a reassuring shake of his head. “I want you to be happy. I wasn’t the most honest with you, either.”

After a pause, you took Mark’s hand in yours. “I’m sorry,” you said. “And I love you. And I’ll never stop loving you. Whether we’re together or not.”

He nodded at your words. “I know. And I’m sorry. I’m never out of reach- you know where to find me.”

Mark pulled you in for one last hug, crying softly into your shoulder. “Go find that happiness again,” he said. “I’ll always be here.”

After helping move his boxes to the car and exchanging your final goodbyes, you returned to the apartment, clutching the keys in hand like you did the very first time you got them.

The apartment felt quiet, yet strangely comfortable. You’d never seen so many sunbeams shine through the windows like this before- illuminating the empty corners with a hopeful glow. Despite the vacant areas, the apartment felt eerily beautiful like this. You caressed the drywall with a tender hand, thinking briefly about the potential this place always had. There were so many new spots for paintings and photos. So many opportunities to decorate again. So much to look forward to.

“Swear we were only being honest”

Mark’s departure made a lot of things clear for you. You thought about what he said for days after adjusting to the empty apartment- about chasing happiness and learning to embrace the uncertainty you were always so afraid of.

He was right. You had become a shell of the woman you once were, only existing to do work and repeat the routine that tricked you into believing it was the epitome of life itself. But it never had been- it was you who made it that way.

Looking out your window at the empty street late at night, the only noise you could hear was the dull buzz of cicadas that stalked the tall grass.

You returned to your parents’ house for one last night to collect your things and say your goodbyes to your parents. Everything looked the same as it always did on nights like this- cars parked neatly in their spots, houses with their lights off, and neatly trimmed bushes swaying gently in the summer breeze. Your hands trembled as you climbed out the window, dressed for the weather in a light sweater and a pair of shorts.

As you jogged out to the street, you paused to look up at the vast sky above you. The sky had never seen you this late at night like this, out in the middle of the street with such purpose. You were normally curled up with a book at this late hour. Yet you greeted it with excitement and curiosity, laughing up at the constellations as you planted two feet in the concrete below you.

After admiring the scenery at this time, you were on your way again, racing like a child down the block. You passed the houses you had always known, appreciating the way they were a steady part of your life for this long. You turned the corner with such vigor, you thought you might fall if you didn’t slow down. But you didn’t- you ran and ran, and you didn’t stop.

Felix’s house was a mere three blocks from yours, yet you’d never visited in the middle of the night like this. It has always been him to initiate it. He was the risk-taker, the troublemaker, a fact you forced yourself to challenge after your conversation with Mark.

When you arrived, you looked up at his house, unsure of what to do for a moment. You weren’t entirely sure which room was his anymore.

So you pulled out your phone, dialing him before you could stop to overthink it. Felix answered on the second ring.

“Hi,” you breathed.

He paused for a moment.

“Are you… okay?”

“I’m fine,” you replied. “Could you open the window?”

“What?”

“The window. I can’t remember which one is yours- God your grass is tall. There aren't any spiders here, right?”

Before you could finish, the curtains drew back in front of the window closest to you, and Felix stood there with his cellphone pressed to his ear. He observed the way you scratched at an itch on your ankle, finally looking up to meet his gaze and giving him a little wave.

“Aren’t you cold?” He asked, dropping his phone down at his side as you walked over.

“Not a bit. It’s actually kinda nice out.”

He helped you climb in, and you looked around the room with wonder in your eyes.

“Wow. I haven’t been here since we were kids.”

The walls were lined with old photos of him, neatly arrayed in white picture frames. There was a large desk opposite his bed with old taekwondo medals hanging directly above. And his bed was neatly made, except for one corner from which Felix had untucked himself from.

“What are you doing here?” Felix asked with hesitation. His voice was tinged with sadness still.

You set a paper bag down on the desk, turning to face him. “Little something from me.”

Felix looked at the bag and then at you again. You eyed him for a moment, noticing his unkempt hair and the subtle bags under his eyes. His blonde locks were pushed out of his face, framing his expression of sorrow. He wore a plain black t-shirt and sweatpants, much simpler than you’d seen him dressed on other days, yet he somehow still looked so sophisticated.

With reluctance in his step, he unfolded the bag, reaching inside to pull out a small Oreo McFlurry and a carton of fries. He examined the cup, setting it down again and avoiding eye contact.

“I told you I don’t get these anymore.”

“No,” you said. “You said you couldn’t get them because they brought back memories.”

He shrugged. “Yeah. What’s the difference?”

“The difference is that I’m here now. And you don’t have to stop doing all your favorite things because they bring back memories.”

“You don’t get it,” he said, sighing again. “Please don’t make me say it again.”

You hid your hands in the sleeves of your sweater, eyes trembling with fear as you began to speak. Breaking down your walls around other people was always a difficult feat for you.

“You don’t have to say anything,” you told him. “Just please listen to me and then I’ll get out of here.”

Felix sat on the edge of the bed with his hands on his knees.

“Felix- you and I live completely different lives. You left before my life even started. Most of what I know about you I had to learn through google searches. You wake up in different countries 6 out of 7 days in the week. You know what you want, and every single day is different for you.”

“You googled me?” Felix said. You ignored his question as you continued to speak.

“You have to understand that this never would have worked out between us.”

He hung his head and wiped a few stray tears with the back of his hand. “I kind of figured it wasn’t going to work out. You didn’t have to come here to tell me again.”

“I came here,” you interrupted him. “Because I’m in love with you.”

His head snapped up this time, eyebrows furrowed together in confusion as you continued to speak through tears.

“And it scares the hell out of me. We’re two different people in two completely different worlds, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s always been you. And it’s always going to be you. There’s no one else I’d rather get McDonald’s with at 3 in the morning. Or stain fancy tablecloths with. I love it when you do that thing where you check your pulse when you get nervous. Or when you bake me little desserts, even though I never ask you to. And I love wiping your tears after we get intimate, because I hate seeing you sad and I’d spend a lifetime wiping your tears if it meant I could be by your side.”

The room fell quiet as you finished. Felix looked up with an expression of sorrow and shock. His eyes welled with tears as he sniffled and gave you one short nod.

“How about Mark?”

You smiled and shrugged. “Sometimes love has other plans.”

And Felix smiled for the first time tonight, stretching out both arms toward you, which you wasted no time running into. He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into his lap and holding you for a moment as you both laughed through sniffles.

As he pulled away to look into your eyes, his thumbs wiped your tears away delicately, caressing your face in a gentle embrace.

“I don’t want to lose you again,” he said suddenly. His expression shifted to that of concern.

“You have me right now,” you said calmly. “And we’ll figure out the rest. I don’t want to get too caught up in worrying about the future.”

He smiled again, moving a strand of hair out of your face as he leaned in to kiss you. His lips tasted like raspberry, moving gently along yours as you smiled against him.

“What happens now?”

You thought about it for a moment. It was a good question- you hadn’t thought about where the night was going to take you after this conversation.

“Let’s go out.”

“Now? It’s almost 2 in the morning.”

“Now. Let’s go anywhere. I just want to be with you.”

Felix ran a hand through your hair as he chuckled.

“You’re full of surprises tonight.”

You climbed off of him as he walked to the closet and picked out a pair of pants. And you sat watching him eagerly, afraid you might lose him if you looked away for even a second.

When he turned around again to button his pants, he locked eyes with your tender gaze and smiled. The moonlight glistened through the window onto your skin, little blue patches painting your frame delicately like an oil painting. Your eyes sparkled with longing for him, and he smiled at the way you blinked up at him with such endearment.

“I love you,” you said suddenly.

“I love you,” he replied, leaning down to kiss you. “I love you. I love you. I really love you.”

When he finished getting dressed, he took your hand in his, helping you out the window and into the cool summer air. The cicadas and birds were quiet, and the only sounds you could hear came from the trees rustling in the nighttime breeze. Felix towered over you in the dim glow of the streetlights, never once looking away from the twinkle in your eyes as you spoke. And you continued, with no destination in mind, down the streets you had explored so many times as kids together. The same picket fences and concrete roads seemed so much more charming this way- hands interlocked as you stopped every now and then to exchange kisses and share spoonfuls of the now melted Oreo McFlurry. At last, you were home again- all was safe.

“All by yourself, sitting alone”

The loud chime of the overhead speaker caught your attention as you meticulously worked to buckle your seatbelt. All around you, people took their seats too, children squirming with excitement and couples assisting each other with the overhead bins in the aisles. You sat alone, taking in the atmosphere as you prepared for hours of being sat here.

Thoughts of doubt rushed to your mind as you examined a Korean pamphlet in front of you- was this the right decision? Were you going to be happy? Would you even find work there?

Your throat went dry thinking about the endless possibilities. And then you remembered Mark’s kind words echoing through you- “go chase that happiness”.

You were never going to know if you didn’t get out there first. Maybe this was where you were always meant to be.

In between conversations with yourself, your phone buzzed with a new text. You checked it frantically, smiling at the message.

Felix: 🐣

Your heartbeat slowed again, and you took a deep breath as you pushed your negative thoughts aside. You were finally chasing your happiness- Felix was your happiness. And maybe traveling 5,000 miles for the guy you loved seemed crazy, but it felt right. As long as you were by his side, you would face the future together.

You shot him back a little sunshine emoji before putting your phone away again. And you shut your eyes, grateful for the gentle reminder of why you were doing this. You weren’t certain about much, but you were certain about Lee Felix. And maybe that was enough.

#stray kids x you #stray kids hard thoughts #stray kids hard hours #stray kids felix #skz felix #lee felix #skz scenarios #skz smut #skz #stray kids #stray kids fluff #headcanon #fanfic #felix yongbok

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jebewonmorelike · 1 year

Text

Honeydew Boba For Your Boyfriend?

wc: 1.9k pronouns: none used; n/a warnings: fluffy fluffyyy summary: gunwook desperately tries to save his hyung from himself when one glance at cafeowner!reader has gyuvin acting... delulu. ~masterlist~ ♡ ~kofi (no pressure at all)~ my introductory gyubinnie fic. the funniest little nugget of a boy, i adore him. just wanted to write a short fic to test the gyuvin waters (lmao what) so i hope you enjoy. will be working on some requests this weekend finally, sorry i just needed a little break for a bit! as always, much love to you all and i appreciate you reading and enjoying my writing soooo much :) <3

"So that's a no on the 'Hyung Lover' tramp stamp?"

Gyuvin glares at his younger friend as they walk down the bustling city street. "People who think you're the smart one have clearly never spent more than five minutes with you."

"Five minutes is actually pretty generous," Gunwook replies after careful consideration. "So I probably shouldn't have told Yujinnie to get a matching 'Noona Lover' one then...?"

"Are you bored? Is the 17-hour-a-day schedule not enough for you?" Gyuvin asks rhetorically, pulling his phone out and checking his notifications.

"That's probably what it is," Gunwook replies sadly, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "I have a whole extra hour to myself every day and I can never figure out what to do with it."

Gyuvin shakes his head in disbelief, huffing out a laugh. "How about you do my laundry?"

Gunwook's eyes widen innocently. "Do you want me to? I can! I promise you can depend on me, hyung, I--."

"Where's this cafe again?" Gyuvin interjects, looking around at the storefronts lining the street. "We've gotta be back in the studio in twenty minutes."

"It's right there," Gunwook replies, pointing up ahead. The two boys walk the remainder of the way to Gunwook's new favorite cafe, the younger boy grabbing the door handle and holding it open for his hyung as they step inside the shop.

"Hi! How are you?" You call from behind your counter, wiping down some of your drink machines with a damp cloth before turning to greet your next customer. It's a quieter Wednesday afternoon than usual and you smile when you recognize the boy approaching the counter. "Hey, I know you."

"Did you see I made the line-up?" The boy named Gunwook asks with a proud smile. "Aren't you excited to tell everyone that an idol comes to your shop for coffee?"

You laugh at his endearing naivety, pointing to the back wall of your cafe where a line of framed celebrity pictures hang. "Not my first time around the block, kid," you joke, watching as his proud smile now turns sheepish. "But I will give it to you that out of all the idols that come in here, you're certainly the most adorable."

A gummy grin spreads across his face as you suddenly notice he's not alone. Behind Gunwook is an equally tall boy, his frame a bit slimmer and hair a bit lighter than your returning customer.

"Oh, hi," you greet hesitantly, as the boy makes eye contact with you; only for him to quickly duck back behind his friend.

"What are you--," Gunwook questions annoyedly, stepping to the side and pushing the other boy out from behind him. "What's wrong with you?"

The thinner boy is staring at you with wide eyes, chewing his bottom lip nervously. The blush on his cheeks tips you off right away as to what he's thinking.

This was hardly the first time you'd received this sort of look from a customer. You thought your product was good enough, but you had overheard gossip more than once that your cafe was the most "beautifully owned" in the city-- and they weren't talking about the decor. Perhaps that's why your celebrity clientele was more abundant than the average cafe.

"This is my hyung who made the line-up with me," Gunwook introduces, patting his friend on the back. "He's--... he's not usually this shy though."

He's cute, you catch yourself thinking, and the genuine look in his eyes admittedly makes you want to mess with him a bit. You needed some excitement after such a slow Wednesday afternoon... What was the harm in playing along?

Clearly unable to function, the other boy merely stands in front of you unmoving as Gunwook confusedly analyzes him. After a few moments, it seems that the younger boy catches on to his friend's thinking, too.

Gunwook looks back at you anxiously-- smiling as if he's not sure if he should pull his friend aside to scold him or not. "I--... Uh, I'll just have--."

"An iced Americano," you finish for him with a laugh, grabbing a plastic cup and writing his name on it in sharpie.

"Do I come here too often?" He jokes. "Should I start being more equitable with my coffee shop patronage?"

"Go ahead," you retort with a smirk. "Let's see if you can get away with 'accidentally' paying a thousand won less anywhere else."

Gunwook's jaw drops. "So you did notice... Why didn't you say anything!?"

You shrug. "I know you trainees don't have any money and I'm not really hurting for business, so it's no skin off my back. But now that you're an idol, I'm sure you'll be able to make it up to me somehow!"

Gunwook laughs abashedly. "Absolutely... I can pay you back with all of my idol money..." He grimaces. "Give me two years?"

"I'll hold you to it," you agree, attention returning to the older boy standing next to him; whose intense gaze on you hasn't let up for at least a minute now. "Are you--... are you gonna order something too, or...?"

Gunwook hits his friend's shoulder in a manner that is clearly supposed to be nonchalant, but the boy is predictably caught off guard and, thus, nearly falls to the ground. Catching himself, he swallows nervously as he meets your eyes again. "I--... Um... Yes."

"Ooookay," you reply with a nod. "What'll it be?"

"I'll have a bobo.”

"BOBA!" Gunwook yells quickly, hitting the boy's shoulder again. "He wants boba... Boba for the babo."

"Uh..." You stumble, fighting the urge to grin at the adorable duo of idiots in front of you. "Sure thing. What flavor?"

"You."

"DEW!" Gunwook yells again, laughing nervously as he grabs his friend by the shoulder and shakes him a little too hard. "Honeydew. I apologize for his pronunciation, he... grew up abroad!"

"Oh, really?" You ask excitedly-- perfect English suddenly flowing out of your mouth. "So did I! Where did you live?"

Both Gunwook and his friend are now staring wide-eyed and panic-stricken back at you. You're enjoying this quite a bit and you're not about to let them off the hook. They turn to each other wordlessly, blinking at each other for a moment before turning back to you.

"Ca-na-da," Gunwook's friend answers finally.

"Oh," you reply, eyes narrowing slightly in suspicion. "Where in Canada?"

"Uh," the boy stumbles. "The... cold part?"

You blink back at the two tall boys, watching as they squirm slightly under your judging gaze. After you've had your fun, you grin up at them. "Yeah, sounds like Canada to me!"

The boys glance at each other before bursting into nervous laughter. Gunwook throws his arm around his friend's shoulder-- seemingly in relief.

"That'll be 14,000 won," you say; Gunwook starts to fish for cash out of his wallet (the easiest method to stiff you one bill) but he laughs sheepishly when you glare at him. Instead, he hands you his credit card to run through the register.

You hand the card back to the younger boy; grabbing a plastic cup for the boba and looking up at the boy who had ordered it. "What's the name?"

"Your boyfriend," the boy blurts immediately, Gunwook lifting his hand to his forehead to cover his eyes in embarrassment.

"I can't even help you out of that one," the younger boy mumbles, dragging his hand down his face tensely. "His name's Gyuvin and I clearly made a mistake by letting him out of his cage today."

"I'm so sorry," the boy named Gyuvin gushes, suddenly coming to his senses. "I'm sorry, I really didn't--."

"I'll get these drinks out for you both in a few minutes," you cut him off with a straight face as you turn around to your machines, not ready to let him relax just yet. You write Gyuvin's name down on his cup as the two boys walk over to a table to wait for their order.

As you prepare the iced Americano, your eyebrows raise as you hear what sounds like a smack-- followed by an "owwww" from the older boy.

"You're an idiot," you hear Gunwook whisper.

"I know, I know," Gyuvin responds quite glumly, causing you to giggle and subsequently have to cover it up with a cough.

Pouring the milk tea over the boba, you strain to overhear more of the boys' conversation.

"Seriously, hyung," Gunwook continues scolding. "How are you ever supposed to be an idol if you can't even control yourself around the local barista?"

You can hear the pout in Gyuvin's voice as he replies, "Don't pretend like the local barista isn't THE most gorgeous human to ever walk the planet."

"Really? Huh," Gunwook considers genuinely. "I don't see it."

You hear a chair slide back abruptly as Gyuvin yells, "ARE YOU BLIND!?"

You glance over at the boys, who immediately shoot you awkward, overenthusiastic grins as you turn back around.

Gunwook sighs. "Well if you really think that, you've royally messed this up for yourself."

"I dunno... Some people are into weird," Gyuvin responds optimistically and the silence that ensues paints a vivid picture of the undoubtedly hellish death glare that Gunwook is giving him.

Snapping a lid on both drinks, you pull two straws from the container next to the cash register and place one on top of each of the drinks. Before you call the two boys over to grab their order, you smile to yourself as you pick up your sharpie one more time and remove the cap-- carrying out the final phase of your little game...

"Okay, all set!" You call, watching as the boys' heads snap to look at you, awkwardly gathering their things as they rush quickly back up to the counter.

"Thank you SO much," Gunwook says, picking up his iced coffee. "And sorry again."

"I'm so sorry," Gyuvin echoes, nodding at you apologetically. He picks up his boba, eyebrows furrowing suddenly as he examines it. "What is this?"

"Honeydew boba," you answer, running the back of your hand across your forehead. "Just like you ordered."

Gyuvin continues to frown in confusion. "But I hate boba--."

"That's right! You hate it for making you love it so much!" Gunwook swoops in once again as he places a hand on his friend's shoulder, turning him around and forcing him towards the door. "Thanks again!"

"Thank you!" Gyuvin calls as Gunwook opens the door for him and ushers him out of the shop, a small "I think" reaching your ears as the door closes behind them.

"I can't believe you," Gunwook groans as the two boys walk down the street back to the studio. "Now I can never go back there again. It was so convenient!"

"Why can't we go back there again?" Gyuvin pouts, sipping his boba and frowning at the taste. "It didn't go THAT badly!"

"You tried to order boba in the flavor of the cafe owner!" Gunwook cries.

"Huh, is that what this is?" Gyuvin says, looking at his drink. "Maybe it's not so bad after all..."

"I'm requesting our lunch breaks are shortened," Gunwook announces, sipping his coffee. "I can't spend this much unstructured time with you."

Gyuvin raises his cup to eye-level, swirling it around as he watches the tapioca pearls dance. His eyebrows furrow as he suddenly notices something scribbled on the cup. "Oh my god."

"What!?" Gunwook says, following Gyuvin's line of sight. "What is it? Let me see!"

Gunwook takes the cup from his hyung, squinting to read the small sharpied writing towards the bottom of the plastic cup. "No way," he breathes as he takes in the sight of the phone number, a small message written under it:

in case you ever want to grab a drink that you actually like :)

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ceruleanwind · 2 months

Text

dripped down and drained out

Lestappen | Explicit | 3.9k | Read on AO3

Once Charles steps into Max’s bedroom, he’s met with something that was very decidedly not here the last time he came to visit like this. To be fair, it was late, and he was drunk, and he was certainly not paying attention to Max’s decorating skills, but this isn’t something he could have missed. A very large mirror sits up against the wall, facing the bed. It’s as tall as they both are, and as wide as the two of them standing abreast. It’s huge, and it makes Charles swallow thickly as he realises why Max has brought this into his home. “Oh,” he breathes. Max has taunted him with the idea before—he’d bring a big mirror in, fuck Charles in front of it, show him how pathetically beautiful he looks all spread out on Max’s cock—but Charles thought that was fantasy, that Max wouldn’t ever think to act on it. Clearly, he was wrong. Or: Max surprises Charles with something they've both been wanting to try. Charles is very, very into it.

Charles Leclerc quite likes surprises, if he’s honest.

From surprise birthday parties when he was younger to the time his mother and father surprised him with his very first car, and beyond, Charles thinks surprises are fun. When they’re meant to be fun, of course.

During the summer break, Charles spends his days around Monaco—walking around in the sun, lying out on the deck of his yacht, killing time in the gym. It’s peaceful—a nice rejuvenation before the chaos of the second half of the season.

That is, until Charles grabs coffee from a corner café one morning and feels a tap on his shoulder.

“Come to my place later,” Max murmurs in his ear, his lips nearly brushing the shell of it—much too close for a public place. Charles’ gaze darts to the fans holding up their phone cameras in their general direction. “I have a surprise for you. I think you’ll like it.”

Charles releases a shuddering breath. “Okay,” he whispers, because how could he turn down something like that? He may not quite know what he and Max are, but what he does know is that Max’s voice is awfully hot when it’s all low and breathy like that. Charles has to steady himself on the counter before his knees give out.

Max leans away, smiling. He delivers a friendly pat to Charles’ back, clapping him between his shoulder blades. “Good,” he says, louder now. “I’ll see you later.”

Charles watches as Max strides over to the pick-up counter, collects an iced coffee, and makes his exit, waving politely to a few fans as he goes. Fuck. Charles is so fucked. A surprise? From Max? Charles knows damn well Max doesn’t do surprises, and the thought makes Charles’ stomach turn with nervousness and excitement.

This could really be anything, couldn’t it?

Later that evening, once the sun has dipped down below the horizon, bathing the city in darkness, Charles sneaks into Max’s apartment building and slips into the elevator unseen. Embarrassingly, he’s made an effort tonight; he’s dressed up nice in a button-up and a pair of slim jeans, hiding his freshly washed hair in a hoodie to avoid recognition. It’s only fair, Charles thinks, to dress up, even if he knows deep down that these clothes will end up on the floor in a matter of moments. It’s just how these things tend to go.

“Hey,” Max says once the door swings open, his smile widening. The top half of his shirt is already unbuttoned and Charles swears he could come just from the sight alone. “Come in. I’ll show you what I got for us.” As he stands aside to let Charles in, he can’t help but eye Charles up, gaze catching on his expensive button-up and the way the curve of his ass looks delicious in slimmer jeans.

“Should I be worried?” Charles attempts to tease, his skin already feeling tingly with Max’s eyes all over him. He loves it—loves how exposed he feels in front of Max despite still being fully dressed.

Max laughs, soft and warm, something he seems to save for only Charles. Charles tries not to think about it. “Definitely not,” he answers with that always enticing easy confidence. He curls his fingers around Charles’ wrist and leads him deeper into the apartment, into his bedroom. “Like I said, I think you’ll like it very much.”

A very large mirror sits up against the wall, facing the bed. It’s as tall as they both are, and as wide as the two of them standing abreast. It’s huge, and it makes Charles swallow thickly as he realises why Max has brought this into his home. “Oh,” he breathes. Max has taunted him with the idea before—he’d bring a big mirror in, fuck Charles in front of it, show him how pathetically beautiful he looks all spread out on Max’s cock—but Charles thought that was fantasy, that Max wouldn’t ever think to act on it.

Clearly, he was wrong.

“Do you like it?” Max asks, voice like warm whiskey, honey-sweet. He slides in behind Charles, presses himself to his back, hands finding Charles’ slim waist.

Charles swallows again, his cheeks flushing hot as his mind runs wild. The line of Max’s cock presses up against his ass, stiffening to attention, and it takes all of Charles’ waning self-control not to push his hips back, rut against Max’s clothed cock. “Yeah,” he finally says, barely above a whisper. He feels nearly lightheaded with how fast blood rushes to his cock in response. “I like it.”

Max hums, pressing his lips to the back of Charles’ neck, feeling him shiver under his touch. “Good. I thought you might.” And then suddenly he’s gone, pulling away and stretching his arms above his head as he makes a move for the kitchen. “Now, let’s eat. I haven’t eaten since this morning—I’m starving.”

“Okay,” Charles whispers weakly, following Max to the kitchen despite how his cock hardens up in his jeans. He swears he’ll kill Max one day.

The mirror goes largely forgotten as they both cook and drink and laugh. Max nudges drink after drink in Charles’ direction, insists that he drink a glass of water for each cocktail, and Charles blindly goes along with it, obedient as he tilts the glass to his lips. If everything he does is purely to see Max smile, feel Max curl his hand around the nape of his neck, and hear him whisper good boy, that’s nobody’s problem but his own.

After dinner, they move to the couch, Charles finding his place in Max’s lap as they share a glass of red wine. Charles thinks it tastes much better on Max’s lips. It’s so nice, in fact, that the need to pee escapes Charles completely; it’s only when his bladder begins to ache from the fullness that he squirms, tightening his thighs around Max’s hips. “Fuck,” he mumbles, interrupting their conversation, “hold on. I need to pee.”

Max’s arms encircle Charles’ waist before he can make a move to get up, holding him steady there and grinning when Charles’ eyes widen in panic. “Ah-ah,” he chides in a sing-song, gaze flitting down to what he swears is the overfilled swell of Charles’ bladder showing through his shirt. “Why else do you think I got the mirror, baby?”

Right. The mirror. Charles swallows back the saliva that floods his mouth, the need to pee rapidly building and gathering in his bladder. Fuck. What is Max planning? “I don’t know,” Charles tries, small and helpless in Max’s lap. He tries to twist and reach down to press a hand to his crotch, whining as it abates some of the awful tension.

“Well, I’ll tell you,” Max says, lifting Charles off his lap. Immediately, Charles whimpers at the pressure, gravity working against his bladder. He crosses his thighs and tries his best to follow where Max leads him—right back into the bedroom. “Fucking you in front of it will be nice and all, but—” he guides Charles in front of the mirror, once again stepping in behind him— “I thought it would be fun to make you wet yourself in front of it, too. Can you do that for me?”

Charles’ head spins. The several drinks he had during dinner catch up to him in what seems like an instant and he has to press a hand into his crotch again, squeezing at his desperate cock. Max is talking at him—his muddled brain registers that much—but it’s all a blur to him, Max’s words failing to cut through the haze of need swimming in Charles’ limbs.

Charles’ silence makes Max’s smile drop. He grabs a fistful of Charles’ hair and tugs his head back, baring his throat and forcing him to look at himself in the mirror. “Tell me you want it,” he growls, his other hand slipping up underneath the hem of Charles’ shirt and settling on the swell of his bladder.

Charles squirms in response, hand flying to grab at Max’s in an attempt to ease the pressure. Tears well up in his eyes, frantic and desperate. “Please,” he whispers.

“Tell me you fucking want it.”

His frustration, aching need, everything—it all boils over with a choked sob. Charles panics once he truly realises he can’t hold it. “I want it,” he babbles, nearly incoherent. “Want to make a mess.”

“You’ll make such a pretty mess, won’t you?” Max peppers kisses along the back of Charles’ neck, tilting his head to make eye contact with Charles in the mirror. He already looks wrecked like this, tears threatening to spill out onto his flushed cheeks. “You did such a great job for me wearing these. They’ll look so nice soaking wet, don’t you think?” Max taps at Charles’ hip, still hugged by his slim blue jeans.

Charles nods, mindless from both the praise and the imminence of wetting his pants. He can practically picture it already, looking in the mirror: letting go completely, watching as a dark wet patch blooms over the fabric, streaking hot down his legs. It’ll feel so good, but—Charles meets Max’s eyes in the mirror again and his cheeks heat up in response—doing this with Max watching is a different story entirely.

Max presses closer, right up against Charles’ back. “Are you shy?” he taunts in that awful honey-sweet tone again. “Didn’t you say you wanted it? Here, maybe I can help.” He splays his hand across Charles’ lower stomach and pushes right into the curve of Charles’ bladder.

“Don’t,” Charles gasps as a spurt of liquid heat escapes his cock and soaks into his boxers, the sudden rush of adrenaline leaving him breathless. The fabric of his boxers clings to his skin and he silently wishes for Max to relent, to let him use the bathroom before he makes a real mess of himself. “Don’t make me, please, I—”

“I’m not making you,” Max says, his voice ringing clear and self-assured in Charles’ foggy mind. “You’re doing this yourself. Won’t it feel so good? You’ve been such a good boy holding it this long—why can’t you finish this off for me? Do I have to help you?” Without waiting for a response, Max presses on Charles’ lower stomach again, much firmer this time. He grinds his clothed cock into Charles’ ass and pushes hard on his stomach and grins to himself once he feels Charles’ body give out in his arms.

Once it comes, Charles can’t seem to stop it.

A trickle of heat spurts from the tip of his cock and he gasps again, muscles clenching to keep the flood at bay, but to no avail; his bladder seems insistent on emptying itself now that it’s started and Charles whimpers, relaxing in Max’s hold and letting it come. His heart thrashes in his chest at the shiver that wracks his body, trembling on his feet as his piss hisses out into his jeans, spreading sickeningly slowly on the blue fabric. He moans, letting his eyes slide shut, the pent-up tension giving way to dizzying, full-body relief.

“Look at yourself,” Max orders, firm in Charles’ ear. It jolts him so much that Charles’ eyes fly open, focusing on the image of himself in the mirror. “Look how messy you are.”

And, God, is he making a mess. Charles whimpers again as he lays eyes on his own flushed cheeks, the two fat, hot tears spilling out onto blood-hot skin, then down to where the obscene dark wet patch spreads on the front of his jeans, pooling at his crotch and streaking down his legs. His piss glistens wet on the fabric when he spreads his thighs just the tiniest bit apart where he’s standing, wincing when he hears his piss spraying hot against his underwear and the inside of his jeans. “Feels so good,” he moans, tilting his head back against Max’s shoulder. “So warm.”

Max hums, grinding his clothed cock up into Charles’ soaking wet ass. “See? I knew you could do it,” he murmurs, kissing at the sensitive spot below Charles’ earlobe. “Maybe you’re not so shy after all. Look at you, all spread out just for me.”

Charles whines, grinding back against Max’s cock as his flow finally begins to taper off. His soaking wet jeans cling to his ass and thighs and crotch and Charles can’t stop thinking about how sensitive his cock is, his wet underwear dragging against his length with each move he makes. His hips twitch up of their own accord, a shiver of overstimulation wracking his body. “Fuck,” he whimpers, his cock rapidly stiffening to attention now that he’s pissed. He has half a mind to look back at the mirror, watch as the tent in his glistening wet jeans grows with each passing moment, and he pointedly ignores just how slutty he looks like this, thighs spread and hips rutting back onto Max’s clothed cock, desperate for the tiniest bit of friction.

“Oh, baby,” Max coos, pressing another kiss to the side of Charles’ neck as he lays his hand over the wet bulge in Charles’ jeans, “did that make you hard? Making a big mess of yourself for me?” He palms at Charles’ cock through his clothes, long, wet drags of his palm against it, and Charles wants to cry at how good it feels. The humiliation goes right to Charles’ cock and he whines, mindlessly rutting forward into Max’s hand and trying not to think about the obscene slick sounds of his piss-soaked clothes against Max’s palm.

Charles brings himself to nod despite the embarrassment twisting low in his gut. The image of himself in the mirror, soaked from waist to toe and rutting into Max’s hand like some sort of dog is almost too much for him to bear. “Please,” he whispers, choking out a moan when Max grinds forward into his ass again.

Max smiles, lifting his hand away. “What do you want?” he asks, lips brushing against Charles’ neck. “Tell me. You’ve been so good.”

Charles has to swallow, frustrated tears pricking at the corners of his eyes once Max takes away that delicious friction. He ruts against air for a moment, emitting something between a whine and a sob, before he lets himself beg. “Want you to fuck me,” he mumbles, cheeks heating up yet again. He’ll never tell it all to Max—that he wants to watch himself get fucked, spread open in front of the mirror as Max fucks him from behind. That he wants to hear Max call him his good boy that knows just how to piss himself. “Please,” he adds for good measure, swallowing back his drool.

Max doesn’t need to be asked twice. His smile broadens as he reaches around Charles to unbutton his jeans, slide the soaking wet fabric down his legs. Charles is just as wet underneath them, his piss rapidly cooling on his legs, and he’s fucking hard too, his cock standing up in his drenched boxers. “You look so pretty,” Max murmurs as he slides Charles’ boxers down, letting his cock spring free. It curves up against Charles’ lower stomach, the tip drooling pre-come out onto his nice button-up shirt.

Charles thinks he might die from how hot this is. His eyes are firmly trained on the mirror, how he looks with Max’s big hands all over him, manhandling him to where he wants him. He watches how Max breaks away momentarily for lube, how he drenches his fingers with it, how he nudges Charles’ thighs apart with his knee and reaches down to rub a slick fingertip between his cheeks. It’s easy for Max to push his finger into Charles’ already slick hole, and his eyes widen with surprise.

“In the shower,” Charles pants before Max can ask. “Before. Opened myself up for you.” He arches his back the best he can while he’s standing, pushing his pert little ass out in Max’s direction. “Please. I can take it.”

“Oh,” Max whispers, catching his bottom lip between his teeth. “Fuck. You’re such a perfect little thing for me.” He pushes a second finger into Charles’ wanting hole, then a third with a bit of a stretch, curling them into the tight heat of Charles’ body and delighting in the way he squirms for more, wanton noises falling from his lips.

“Please fuck me,” Charles begs weakly, hair sticking to his sweaty forehead. Max’s fingers buried inside his hole feel like heaven and hell simultaneously—he’d much prefer it to be Max’s cock. “Please. Haven’t I been good? I—I made a mess, just like you wanted.”

“Just like you wanted,” Max corrects, easing his fingers out of Charles’ hole and instead shoving his own pants down, the front of them soaked with how he was grinding into Charles’ wet ass. His cock, hard and leaking, eagerly springs free once he kicks his boxers off, the tip flushed and angry-looking. He takes a moment to smear lube along the length of it, giving himself a few slick strokes before moving closer to fit his cockhead against Charles’ rim.

Charles nods frantically, trying to push his hips back onto Max’s cock. “Wanted it so bad,” he breathes, meeting Max’s eyes in the mirror. “Wanted you to watch me make a mess.”

Max nods his approval, chuckling as he steadies Charles’ eager hips with his hands. “You looked perfect,” he goes on, slipping his enormous cockhead past Charles’ tight rim, the first inch carving him open, slick walls parting just for him. “Do you like it, baby? Seeing how pathetic you are?”

Charles wants to cry as Max pushes steadily into him, nearly splitting him open. It’s all too much and not enough and all Charles can do is take it, his legs shaking with the effort of holding himself up. “Love it,” he babbles. “Love being good for you. Doesn’t matter what I have to do.”

“Fuck,” Max swears under his breath. He sits down on the edge of his bed and pulls Charles with him, seating him in his lap, burying his cock in Charles’ tight little hole. “God. Look how pretty you are sitting on my cock,” he growls in Charles’ ear, hips twitching up to fuck into him like this, hard and fast. He brings one hand up to grab at Charles’ hair again, forcing his head back to look at himself.

Charles whimpers as he lays eyes on the mirror once more, gaze darting all around—how he’s spread obscenely over Max’s lap, the tug of Max’s fingers in his hair, the way Max fucks up into his hole—it’s all so much. His lips part on a moan, his back arching as he sits there and takes it, hole desperately clenching around Max’s massive cock. He’s so sensitive after pissing himself already, and with Max’s cock carving him open, the head nudging deliciously up into his prostate with each thrust, Charles is sure he won’t last long at all.

Max groans right in Charles’ ear, reaching around him to wrap his hand around Charles’ wet cock and stroke him like this, the slide eased by his piss and pre-come. He’ll come embarrassingly fast after having witnessed Charles make a mess of himself, moaning as he did it, but Max is hell-bent on making Charles come first. His hand quickens around Charles’ cock, thrusting wildly up into him, the slap of skin on skin echoing obscenely in the otherwise silent room.

Charles wails out loud, the building pleasure suddenly becoming too much far too quickly. His hips stutter and he comes hard all over Max’s fist and his own shirt, body jerking with each rope of come that spurts from his cockhead. Max’s hand still works relentlessly at his cock and as soon as the stars disperse from his vision, Charles finally registers the spurts of warmth that still spray from his cock—fuck, he’s fucking pissing, again, each thrust of Max’s cock into his hole forcing another spurt from his aching bladder.

“Fuck, look at you,” Max pants, taking his hand away from Charles’ cock so he can take a good look at the show. “So wet tonight, aren’t you? Am I fucking the piss out of you?”

God, the words feel filthy to hear. Charles buries his face in his hands, feeling his cheeks warm against his palms. He can’t help himself—Max’s cock is so impossibly huge inside him, pressing against his bladder with each thrust and forcing the last of the piss out of him, his exhausted muscles failing to compete. “Fuck,” he squeaks, goosebumps erupting all over his skin at the sudden overstimulation. At least his bladder’s empty, now, and Max can use him as some sort of cocksleeve to come in without a fight.

And that’s exactly what Max does. With one, two, three deep strokes into Charles’ slick little hole, Max’s hips twitch and he groans as he comes, panting against the soft skin of Charles’ neck. He paints Charles’ walls with his come, filling him up and fucking it into him, the slick sounds making them both wince at how dirty it is.

Finally, everything stops. Charles sits panting in Max’s lap, doubled over, hands on his sticky wet knees as he fights for his breath back. His skin tingles all over with the relief of pissing and the aftershocks of his orgasm, relentless as always. His gaze slides up to the mirror and fuck, he looks wrecked. Tear tracks dry on his flushed cheeks, his hair’s a mess from Max pulling at it, and drool runs down his chin; Charles doesn’t remember drooling in the first place. His skin still shines wet with his own piss, cold and uncomfortable now compared to the delicious warmth of before.

“Oh my God,” Max breathes, laughing against Charles’ neck before pulling back to look at them both in the mirror. “That was . . .”

“Perfect,” Charles finishes for him, smiling shyly as he makes eye contact with Max in the mirror. He summons up enough strength to lift himself up off Max’s lap, wincing as Max’s cock slips out of his wrecked hole. “But I can’t believe you made me ruin those jeans, chéri, they were brand new . . .” Charles purses his lips in a pout, getting to his feet and resisting the urge to whine as Max’s come runs down the insides of his thighs.

Max laughs again, delivering a sharp slap to Charles’ bare ass and delighting in the way he squeals at the flash of pain that rips through him. “We’ll wash them,” he says, getting to his feet and walking with Charles over to the ensuite bathroom. “They’ll be good as new. I promise.”

As they make their way to the bathroom, Charles catches one last glimpse of himself in the mirror and a fresh wave of heat rushes right to his cheeks. Yeah, he thinks. Yeah, he does quite like surprises. Especially when it’s Max orchestrating them.

#f1 fanfic #f1 rpf #lestappen #1633 #3316 #f1blr #yup. the lestappen omo drought is over. enjoy #my fics

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satcskinny · 14 days

Text

🍸🫒💫Day 2 biatch (no weigh)💫🫒🍸

last night I walked 10k for no reason. It felt good enough to do it again, It wasn't hard like I was expecting, I just strutted 10 blocks and picked up a diet coke, coffee and kiwi fruit and strutted back, I think Ill go again tonight.

This morning, I went to an Italian deli and got a coffee and sandwich to go because I had to see my therapist early. FUCK ME IT WAS SO GOOD. Was it probably 500 calories? Yes. Do I care? YES. Oh well I probably have only had another 400 calories since, so I just have to cap it at 300 more....

I forgot to weigh this morning, but I look definitely slimmer, I'm not bloating as much because I'm not eating a lot. I get to weigh on the fancy scale at the nutritionist tomorrow so Ill post results when I get back. I've also started a habit tracker, and Ill reward myself with a facial if I do well. Im gonna nibble on a salad tonight like a rabbit and try not to think about food. Why do I only every think about food?

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artificial-transmutations · 1 year

Text

Closer Than Flesh - Insights

Jake has hardly any opportunity to react to his changing body. The orgasm that washes through his body is so intense and so enduring Jake can do hardly anything but moan, as his body reforms again, throwing him into yet another life. It is clear to see from the beginning that the new body Jake is getting is much less bulky than Dragoslav's athletic boxer body.

The big calves and biceps Dragoslav had worked so hard on cultivating melt away in seconds, leaving Jake's frame much thinner - and also smoother. While his chest and groin had been shaved before, they become even more smooth by the moment, and his arms and legs follow suit. While his body is still undoubtable male (pronounced by the huge stiff dick Jake still has his hand around), it becomes much slimmer and delicate. It's not weak, at least not compared to Jake's original body, but there are no bulging muscles, enabling him to move elegantly like a dancer.

His skin tone darkens somewhat, giving him a slightly olive tone, which is still a stark contrast to the pale bodies of Marcel and Dragoslav he had been in before. It seems that this skin has been sun-kissed but hardly ever burned. It is free of blemishes or skars, just smooth and beautiful and perfect. On his arms and neck, green ink appears, accentuating the perfect skin even more.

The whole body that forms has a youthful charm to it, but not so youthful to sow any doubts if the body is that of an adult.

All during his transformation, the orgasm from jerking off is still ongoing, making Jake moan loudly. Finally, the world around him returns, forming a cheap apartment around him again: Comparable in wealth to the one Marcel was living in, but decorated entirely different. Although made from cheap materials, there are some vases with flowers around, and everything is clean and tidy.

Jake finds himself sitting on a couch and shooting one bigger spurt of cum, now someone else’s cum, on the coffee table before the orgasm finally subsides.

Skyler, too, is lost in ecstasy. He feels good! Dragoslav's big hand has brought him over the edge quickly, and he had managed to use the stone to get them out just in time.

At the same time, Skyler feels miserable. Vulnerable like he had never felt for the last centuries and violated by what those humans just did to him. Through their flawlessly executed magic ritual, they had taken Skyler's power and transferred it into nothing more than a piece of rock. A stone, adorned with a symbol Skyler hadn't seen for ages now, a symbol he would very much like to forget. Yet, they had somehow found out about the symbol and about who it stands for. It had been ages since Skyler had fought that being, and yet, it still continues to haunt him. Finally, they had released Skyler, after siphoning more than half his essence. It had apparently been luck on his side, that they didn't drain him empty. Those humans had underestimated the full extent of his might, and the stone just could not hold any more of it. So, they finally dismissed Skyler, convinced that what little power remained in him should pose no danger.

The sad part is, that they are right. Less than half his magic remains with him, and Skyler feels as empty and powerless as he has not felt in all of his existence. Back in his home plane, in his palace of twisted flesh in the seventh hell, Skyler is furious. His clawed hand opens and makes a fist continuously as he walks back and forth. His tail twitches uneasily, mirroring his thoughts. He needs to get his power back, but he does not know how. The cultists mentioned other demons whose power had been taken, but Skyler doesn't know who. Hell holds demons uncounted, most of them pitiful and weak. But nobody would admit to losing power - too great was the risk that others would take advantage of that fact. Life in hell is dangerous and cruel. There is just no room for weakness down here.

Still, Skyler is at a loss. He needs help to deal with this situation, that is certain. He does not like it, but of all the demons of hell, there is probably only one that can help him now.

Skyler sits down on his throne. The four men the throne is made of sigh and moan as Skyler sits down on their naked flesh that is twisted and transformed to form his furniture. The two ridiculously large and perpetually erect cocks that form the thrones armrests throb and pulse as Skyler rests his arms on them. Usually, he considers the throne one of his best works among all the palace that is entirely made out of the bodies of foolish men Skyler had transformed for his pleasure. In a way, he is nicer than other demons. He isn't much of a fan of eternal torture or unnecessary cruelty. It is entirely fine for him when his victims are caught in a never ending haze of orgasmic bliss as he repurposes their bodies and souls. Today, however, Skyler can't find joy in all that. Sighing and preparing mentally for the difficult conversation ahead, he booms into the empty throne room:

"Come Forth, Mog'Tol!"

Slowly, Jake's breath slows down again, and he looks around, taking in his surroundings. Bright sunlight comes through the wine red curtains. It is pretty hot here, but his new body seems to be used to the heat: He doesn't find it particularly uncomfortable. Feeling safe enough for the moment, Jake's first impulse is to search for a mirror. He stops in his tracks however shortly after he stands up. He should clean up first. He can't have dried up cum stains on his coffee table after all. So, Jake takes a paper towel and wipes away the generous coating of cum from the surface, before he disposes of the soft piece of paper.

Now that this is taken care of, he quickly finds the bathroom and looks at himself in the spotless mirror. His new body is really handsome! A boyish charm on a well maintained slim body. A piercing in his ear and a few tattoos accentuate the natural beauty of his. His body hair is neatly shaved away, making him smooth and flexible. The only thing that stands out is his large cock, which is a bit out of line. Jake would have expected a more modest equipment and he is puzzled for a moment why the stone's magic decided on such a large python between his legs.

Still, the body is handsome beyond measure. If he could, he definitely would have sex with himself right away. The memory of him being straight fades by the second.

Even though he just rubbed one out, Jake feels himself getting aroused again, simply by admiring his own body. The large cock slowly raising again, as...

Skyler! Right! That's the reason why has such a large penis. It's his dick Skyler! No, that's not right, not his dick, but his... friend? It makes sense, yes. With such a magnificent tool, who wouldn't give it a name and talk to it once in a while.

Back to admiring! He just loves the way his smooth stomach meets his large, erect cock. It's a stark contrast and yet a work of art in itself.

His thoughts are interrupted by the voice of Skyler in his head.

"Holy shit, that's one killer body!"

"I know, right?", Jake grins and gives Skyler a playful stroke, which is immediately answered by a throb of the stiff rod. One thing he especially loves about his body is his near limitless stamina. Others call him insatiable, but that doesn't matter to Jake.

"Damn, my cock is already slick from pre again!" Jake says to himself. "Better give it what it wants."

Skyler wants to object, to a lot of things. To Jake not talking to him but about him. To calling him his cock again. Especially to using 'it' to refer to him. But the touch of his hand feels just so good. A quick jerk certainly won't hurt, right?

Just before Skyler is lost in the pleasure, he suddenly remembers the vision. The throne, made of the warped bodies of four men, entangled in pleasure together for eternity. With every ounce of self-control, he can muster, he says:

"Jake, stop!"

Jake stops, somewhat confused, and asks: "Why?"

It helps Skyler to think clearly that Jake doesn't continue to tease him.

"Because that's what the demon wants! That we lose ourselves like this. It's the demon Jake, it's his influence."

Jake sighs. "But it feels so good. I mean, have you looked at this body? Perhaps we can just..."

"No, Jake! We can't! You need to get dressed and then we need to find out what to do. Remember, we don't have much time. Perhaps only a few hours."

"Fine!", the light and playful voice of Jake's new body sounds disappointed and annoyed, but he takes his hand from his cock.

Slowly, Skyler returns to his flaccid state and doesn't object when Jake puts on a tight fitting pair of silk underwear.

"We also need to talk about what happened earlier." Skyler states, although he is certain that this isn't going to be an easy talk.

"What do you mean? You had a good idea, and we escaped the demon's henchmen." Jake answers, sounding somewhat confused.

Skyler really wishes he could have that discussion face to face with him, but he had to work with what was available.

"That's not what I mean. I meant the way you are behaving lately. You are being rude to me and also, you're acting like a real asshole to be honest. You almost hurt the old lady back then, who didn't do anything!"

Jake stays silent for a while and Skyler would give everything to be able to see his face. Is he angry? Hurt? Did his words reach him? Skyler can't even say if Jake is thinking or playing with his phone.

"Sorry, I guess." Jake's new voice finally answers. "It's a lot for me, with all the magic and demons and bodies."

Skyler feels sorry for Jake, he really does. But he still needs to press his point, as much as it pains him to torture his friend.

"I know, Jake. But you have to stay strong, you have to stay you. Otherwise, I can't see how we are going to get out of it."

There is no answer, but Jake sighs again.

"Alright, let's find out where we are."

Again, unlocking the phone thankfully works and after a short while, Jake shares his first insights.

"Okay. So apparently, we are in Argentina. My name is José, which is a really cool name by the way, and he doesn't appear to be particularly rich, judging from his apartment. Also, do you know the App 'Grindr'? I keep getting notifications from it."

"Ehm yes. It's like Tinder, but for dudes only, if you catch my drift. Only focused even more on sex. Seems like José is pretty gay.", Skyler explains.

"Makes sense. Let me scroll through really quickly. Hmmm. Oh. That's a penis. Okay.", Jake says, clearly distracted.

"Focus, Jake!"

"Right, sorry. So, judging from the last few chats, I am some kind of... gay prostitute? I seem to be willing to sleep with everyone and ask for money in return."

"Yeah... That's a prostitute." Skyler agrees.

After a few moments, Skyler suddenly gets an idea, a big idea, an epiphany even.

"Oh wow! I think I just understood something! Have you also wondered how the bodies are chosen?"

"Actually, I thought they were chosen pretty randomly. I couldn't see a pattern yet."

"Well, perhaps the exact body is random, but the general theme is not. I mean, think about it: We desperately needed to find out more about the stone and, boom, all of a sudden, we're in Romania, only two hours’ drive away from the place I found it in. We escape from the demon's goons by jerking off together and find ourselves in the body of a sex crazed sex worker. This really fits together too well! "

"Yes, perhaps you're on to something. The times before when we barely escaped, my body always became stronger than the last, more fighter like. People you wouldn't want to meet after dark. But how does it work?" Jake sounds excited as well.

"It's because the stone..." Skyler is so close to understanding, he can almost feel it. What does he know about the stone? It's a portion of Baelnath's power, sure, but how does that... Oh!

"It's because the stone works with demonic magic! And the difference between human magic and demonic magic is that demonic magic does what you mean, not what you say."

"Neat! That means if we really mean it, we could return to my original body?"

"Our original bodies, but yes, I think so. However, ... I don't think we should yet." Skyler sounds a bit sad as he says so.

"Why not? Now that we know how it works, what is stopping us?"

"The demon. If we return to our old lives, this will not stop the demon from chasing us. If anything, it will make it easier for him. He only needs a few hours to locate us and then he attacks. Even though this is really cruel, I rather have a Marcel or Dragoslav killed than myself. "

" You think the demon killed them? " Jake sounds stunned.

"What else do you think he does to them after we leave the bodies? Invite them for tea?" Skyler could think of more alternatives, thinking back to the palace of the demon. But that is something he doesn't need to share with Jake right now.

"Do you think he has killed me? I mean my original body? Let me check!" Jake says with a hint of panic.

"What are you doing?" Skyler is alarmed. He just hopes Jake doesn't do anything stupid.

"Relax, I'm just googling."

"Okay... This is weird.", he concludes after a while. "We are reported as missing, both of us. Missing, but not dead, which is a plus. I don't know about the Arab guy, but for Marcel and Dragoslav... There is just no record of them."

"So, they haven't been reported as missing?"

"No, and I can't find anything else on them. No Facebook profile, Google yields nothing... It's like they don't even exist!"

"Weird. Try Piotr or Tălmara perhaps."

"Hmmm... Nothing on the town, but there's something on Piotr. According to the translator, he posted on Facebook that he fell and hit his head when he went swimming and that next time someone should better come with him. Oh, he mentions some girl, I think he is hitting on her with that. " Jake reports.

"So, Piotr is still alive, that's a relief."

"Yes, but still no sign of Marcel. It's like..."

"... He doesn't even exist." finishes Skyler. "Creepy. Do you think the stone just creates their lives?"

"That's the only explanation. And it also explains Marcel's poster. He had an erotic poster of a girl in his apartment, but after we watched gay porn together, it changed to a guy."

"Which also makes it easy for the stone to fulfill our wishes when we use it. It doesn't have to find a suitable host body, it 'just' creates a live that fits." Skyler deducts. "But this also means that everything about your new body *could* be related to what we want most, to find out more about Baelnath and defeat him."

"I think that's going a bit far. I don't see how Marcel being a construction worker helped us in any way." Jake sounds sceptic.

"True, not everything is related. But who knows, let's go through José's stuff."

Most of the prostitute's belongings are not really helpful in any way - although the amount of sex toys is simply astonishing. José has a whole wardrobe filled with neatly sorted toys, from fleshlights to butt plugs.

Finally, Jake and Skyler concentrate on José's phone again.

"Perhaps let's go through the contacts." Skyler suggests.

"Alright, who do we have here... I really have a lot of customers as it seems. Francisco Aguilar, Emilio Botezatu, Carlos Gutierrez, Esteban Fernandez, ..." Jake reads.

"Wait. What was that?" Skyler interrupts.

"Esteban Fernandez?" Jake repeats.

"No, the, I think second name. Can you repeat it?"

"Emilio Botezatu?"

"Yes, that one! I've heard that last name before... But I don't remember where."

"You're right, Sky!" Jake is excited. "It's the name the old lady in Tălmara mentioned! Right, you couldn't understand that. It's the name of the family who lived in the house where you found the stone. She said that they made deals with the devil."

"Oh! So, they are related to that 'Binding Circle' from my vision. I don't think that name is a coincidence. Perhaps he is a descendant of that family?"

"Possibly. We should definitely talk to him! Hm, apparently, he is a customer. I don't have a phone number, just a Grindr handle."

"That works, too." Skyler decides. "But be careful, this is a hell of an opportunity. We need to be very subtle and quick, so Baelnath doesn't send his henchmen after us before we learned everything."

Jake smiles. "Well, I know a way for us to get close to him no problem. That's okay for you, pija [dick]?"

Skyler sighs. "Yes, you're probably right. It's the best way to get close to him without raising suspicion. Go for it, gigolo."

And like that, Jake messages Emilio on Grindr. From their history, it's pretty clear that Emilio is a top and has met with José once before, to 'plow his juicy ass', as he put it. It doesn't take too much convincing on Jake's side to arrange another meeting this night, after describing how empty his ass feels and how he misses Emilio’s big prick.

Of course, Jake has absolutely no recollection of any past meeting, but he seems to strike the right note, since Emilio instantly sends him a picture of a rather big bulge tenting some old work jeans. It's not even pretended when Jake comments that he can't wait. Both him and Skyler feel horny enough from the short conversation to yearn towards their meeting tonight.

When the evening finally comes and it's time for Jake to leave the house, he is feeling somewhat nervous. Not only is there the real danger of meeting the demon's men again, and the whole thing could be a well laid trap, but also Jake also feels insecure about the job ahead. He has never taken it up the ass or had sex with a man before (and only once with a woman), so he isn't quite sure what to expect. He just hopes José's instincts or Skyler's experience on that matter will help him.

Emilio's home is a farm house as it seems. Luckily, there are no more workers around, and either Emilio lives alone or has arranged for an empty house. Nevertheless, Jake feels incredibly nervous, as he rings the doorbell.

When Emilio opens the door, Jake sees a rugged, good looking farmer in front of him. Still somewhat sweaty from the day’s work and smelling musky and manly.

"Nice..." comes Skyler's voice in his head, telling Jake at once that the burly man is entirely Jake's type. That will make things a lot easier, he figures.

"Come in!" says Emilio and closes the door behind him.

As soon as Jake entered, he feels a hand from behind on his behind.

"So, you missed me, huh?" Emilio asks with a husky voice and thinly veiled lust.

"Yes, papá!" Jake responds excitedly. He didn't plan on the trailing "daddy", but it seems right given the situation. Good to see that either José or Skyler was in the game as well.

"Then what are you waiting for? Get rid of your clothes and then help me get out of mine!" Emilio grunts.

Jake doesn't hesitate and strips himself naked, almost as if he's doing a striptease. He looks over his shoulder and sees Emilio standing there, already with his pants undone and his large penis sticking out. The cock is nearly the same size as the one Jake is unpacking.

Jake takes a few steps closer and kisses Emilio passionately. Then, he grabs the hard-on and starts stroking it with both hands. It is rock solid, thick, and long. When Emilio groans in pleasure, Jake is happy. This guy knows what he likes. Jake gets on his knees and looks at the member in front of him. Uncut, thick and veiny, and ripe with the unwashed musk of a day’s work in the field. It looks delicious! Jake strokes the cock gently and licks the pre-cum from the tip. He opens his mouth and slurps down all of it, getting the taste of manly salty flavor on his tongue.

"Oh fuck! That's it! Take my cock, puto [Male prostitute]! Suck it!" Emilio growls.

Jake complies, taking the entire shaft in his mouth and sucking greedily. To his amazement, the gag reflexes of José seem nearly non-existent. He swallows the huge penis deeper and deeper until it is completely in his throat. Emilio groans with pleasure and holds onto the back of Jake's head while he fucks the young man's face.

Finally, he pulls Jake off his groin and his wet dick.

"Enough. Turn around!" he says and points to the kitchen counter. Jake obeys happily, bending over the kitchen counter and exposing his well-groomed ass to the other man.

Emilio quickly dives into Jake's ass, his fat prick rubbing against the tight ring of muscles. He grabs his hips and begins to ram in and out, pushing harder and harder.

Jake and Skyler feel incredible. It is one thing to jerk off, but it's an entirely different story to have their ass rammed like that. Almost immediately, Jake's hand finds Skyler's shaft body and begins to jerk, as their minds meld together once more, lost in the pleasure of the strong man behind them plowing their ass.

"I'm gonna cum!" Emilio warns.

"Mmmm, yes! Make my ass yours, papi! Fill it with your seed!" Jake moans.

Emilio feels the young man's ass tense up and moan, and thrusts deep into him. Then, with a cry, Jake can feel the spreading wet warmth of the farmer's seed inside his body.

From a sex worker's perspective, it has been really stupid to not use any protection. But Jake/Skyler is far too busy experiencing an orgasmic high as he comes himself, all over the kitchen counter and himself.

For a short while, neither man says anything, as they are both seeing stars. Finally, Emilio pulls out and grunts. "You can clean yourself up in the bathroom." he offers, which Jake gladly accepts.

It has been a rather short encounter, but still an intense one.

When Jake returns to the living room, Emilio already has a pack of cash ready for him. Jake takes it and is almost about to leave when Skyler interjects: "Dude. Information!"

"Right." Jake mutters under his breath before turning back to Emilio.

"Do you mind if I ask you a question, big guy?" he asks innocently, with his sweetest smile.

Emilio nods and Jake continues. "That last name of yours - it's not from around here, is it?"

"No, you're right. It's from Romania. My great-grandfather came from there."

"Ohhh, Romania", Jake coos. "That's far away! Why did they come here?"

"Heh." laughs Emilio. "If you like to know, it's quite a funny legend actually."

"Oh, please tell me, papi!" Jake reinforces, trying his best to stay in character.

"Okay, so. From what I heard is that my family was pretty important back then in Romania. Rich or influential. In any case, they had weird hobbies. Back then, occult societies were a big thing, but rumor is that my family was doing the real thing. Magic. At least that's what I've been told. They were casting spells and summoning demons and all that. And made magical artifacts. But one day, and that's just the bullshit I was told, they decided to summon an angel instead. And as the story goes, naturally, God struck down every one of them. Except my great-grandfather, wo left everything behind after that."

"That's creepy." Jake comments. "But what happened to all their stuff? The magical artifacts and so on?"

"No idea. My dad tried to find out more about that, since he guessed there was a lot of valuable stuff, but ultimately failed. He said the trail ends in World War 2, when Romania was allied with Nazi Germany. His best guess is that the nazis took everything that looked remotely valuable then."

"What a nice story, papi!", Jake says absent-mindedly and stands up. "I need to go now."

Emilio was a little bit surprised as Jake left so abruptly, but Skyler had other things on his mind and urged Jake to get to privacy.

"What did he say?" Skyler asks, excitedly.

After Jake summarizes the story, Skyler says: "Do you know what that means?"

"No, but I have the feeling you're about to tell me." Jake replies, as he walks down the dark road back towards his home.

"Okay, look. These 'artifacts' he told you about, those are probably other sigil stones. Or like, magic books. In any case, this could be really really valuable. We could get our hands on some magical weapons that we can use against Baelnath!"

Jake was a bit more skeptical but nodded slowly. "IF we get our hands on them. Right now, we don't know anything more than that the items are, perhaps, in Germany. Or were in Germany at some point."

"Yes, but... Oh crap. He's coming." Skyler's voice changes mid-sentence, as a now familiar feeling rushes over him. Surely enough, the road around Jake fills with dark red smoke and he can feel his heart beating faster. It appears the demon himself is making an appearance. Jake clutches the stone tightly, hoping he will have enough luck to escape once more.

Jake looks around uneasily until he sees where the fog becomes denser, and the red skinned demon walks out of it. Surprisingly enough, his body language is different from before. He stops a good distance from Jake and raises his arms.

"Hold on! I want to talk!" The voice that pierces Jake's mind is not friendly - but also not quite as driven by emotions as before.

Jake considers for a moment. He has his hand around the stone in his pocket. He could escape at any moment, and as long as the demon doesn't come closer, he sees no way he could be harmed before using the stone.

"What do you want?" Jake says cautiously. No reaction from Skyler. The penis had probably been overwhelmed by the demon's presence again, he had to do that on his own.

"You are in possession of something I want." says the demon, walking around him in a wide circle, careful not to step closer.

"And since you have proven to be a big nuisance and I really have better things to do with my time than chasing you around the globe, I decided to solve this another way. So, I'm here to offer you a deal. I know you have your hand on the stone already, so I'll make it quick."

Jake feels uneasy. Baelnath is smart, so much is certain. This could very well be a trap, but Jake decides to hear him out anyway.

"You give me the stone, of course, that's still not up for debate. But in return for your cooperation, I will refrain from devouring your soul.", the demon elaborates with a generous voice. "In fact, I will even let you live! And not just any old live. You may become my servant. While that must sound like a bad idea for your oh-so-modern ears, the position comes with certain perks. First, you can chose your body. You can return to your own body, or you can become any man you want. You can be rich, handsome, strong, well-endowed... Everything at once. I am, after all, the master of flesh. But it doesn't stop there. If you do your job well, I will grant you powers and further boons. You can become immortal and wield magic yourself. Isn't that what you mortals are after all the time?"

Jake doesn't know how to react. That is a really bad deal! He doesn't want to be the servant of a demon for all eternity! That is certain. Even though, on second thought, the prospect of being able to choose his body and being free from the pursuit of the demon does sound somewhat tempting. Especially, if the alternative is being caught eventually and being killed.

Perhaps the demon senses his thoughts - or he has his experiences with humans in this situation.

"I don't expect you to answer right away. The offer stands... until the next time we meet. Then you have to decide. Now I suggest making a leave before I lose my patience after all." The last words could be a joke - but Jake isn't so sure about this. Before he finds out the hard way, Jake focuses his thoughts and activates the magic stone in his hand, disappearing from the world yet again.

Unexpected! If you want to re-read the previous chapter, you can find it here. Of course, you can also go to the beginning. The next chapter is available here.

#closer than flesh #male transformation #twink #cock tf

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