Zesty Take #46:
The idea that a gun will keep you safe from govt overreach is, at minimum, a useful tool to institute govt overreach.
When gun ownership is the standard of personal safety and success, it becomes a singular political focus. The primary question for each candidate becomes, "do they in any way threaten my guns?"
Threatening, in this context, has a very loose definition. Depending on the listener, it could be any action or inaction. The fear is both intense and nonspecific.
The rest of a "pro-2a" candidate's policies matter very little. If those policies include govt overreach or legalized abuse, that's ok. The idea that gun ownership protects them from the problems means that they will often vote against their own interests, as long as they feel secure wrt their firearms.
A militarized police force with qualified immunity - which is generally idealized by candidates who are "pro-2a" - eliminates any practical use of private firearms that could at one time have been used as protection against the govt. Legal owners protecting themselves from illegal search and seizure cut the same silhouette as an illegal owner trying to cause harm. Pulling that gun will only put you in the ground.
Increased sustainable hunting is a very valid approach to countering food deserts. However, a gun does nothing to improve infrastructure or education, or preserve social safety nets. You cannot compel an employer to stop committing labor offenses with a gun. You cannot bring a gun to a polling place and eliminate voter disenfranchisement. A gun will not increase accessibility, housing availability, wages, or access to healthcare. Statistics do not support the idea that guns reduce crime.
These are issues that have to be addressed in other ways. They are also issues that are overwhelmingly exacerbated or ignored by "pro-2a" candidates. These candidates succeed in maintaining poor conditions, or worsening them, by securing votes based on their "pro-2a" status.
Individuals who believe that guns are an ultimate protective device are incredibly vulnerable to this political manipulation. Regardless of the source of the idea, or the reason for holding it, it is easily weaponized. And it should be treated accordingly.
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IM HOOOOME
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I want better for you...what's better for you than me? Part 1
Part 1 Summary: You've had a tough day. From an unruly client who is causing chaos to your dog not listening to you to your ex-husband calling you out of the blue. You've had more than enough and the last thing you need right now is any reminders of why you feel such regret and pain in the first place.
A/N: I was working on something with the Kim vs Kanye special thing playing in the background. Some things they discussed about that situation just struck a chord with me and before I knew it, this kind of came flying out onto a doc in the form of a little catharsis in a fictional story I guess. 🤷♀️
All unbeta'd.
Songs listened to while writing: Hummingbird - Carly Pearce; None Of Your Concern - Jhené Aiko
Warnings: heavy angst; mentions of cheating; drinking; language; a healthy dose of snarkiness
Word Count: 5596
Series Masterlist
dividers by @cafekitsune
Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187; @rieleatiel
Jensen Taglist: @samanddeaninatrenchcoat; @deansbbyx
You had just managed to get in the front door, a feat that a moment ago you didn’t think would be possible. You were bogged down with grocery bags, dry cleaning, and the bulkload of mail that would most likely turn out to be eighty five percent bills. Despite being set up to auto-pay everything, you still received a healthy stream of bills in your mailbox every week. You didn’t get it.
So you had already been carrying a heavy load while you managed to stick your latest Amazon package under your arm and the straps of your handbag and briefcase were on the other. Not to mention your dog was urging you to open the door after peeing on your lawn for the fifth time this week and he ignored your pleas for him not to. Somehow you did all of that and still got your key in the door. Milo, being the young spry German Shepherd pup he was, naturally almost mowed you down in his rush to get inside before you, but you survived the canine tornado and still stood strong. You weren’t patting yourself on the back but you definitely deserved some kudos. You had always been laughed at in the past for attempting to do all of this in one shot without any assistance, but you proved you could. Every single time. Considering you now had an eager and energetic four-legged companion who lacked patience (and a tiny bit of discipline if you were being honest) to contend with, kudos were definitely in order.
You slowly put down the grocery bags and package, laying the dry cleaning on your thin table in the foyer, dropping your keys and mail into the giant bowl on a shelf underneath, and placed your other bags to the side of the structure. You heaved a giant sigh of relief and turned to close the door, wincing when Milo barked from the living room. “Hush, Milo. Give me a minute to breathe, please.”
The second you secured the lock, you sank tiredly against the door. You were home and now you could begin to relax. It had been a long day and you were looking forward to changing into something more comfortable and starting the process of unwinding. And as if the universe wanted to foil that plan, your cell phone rang on cue.
“No,” you whined, placing your forehead against the wood of the door for a moment. “What is it now?”
One of your clients had the brilliant idea of doing an impromptu live stream in the wee hours of the morning to discuss their upcoming divorce, in full detail, in a bid to get their estranged spouse back. As a result, your phone had not stopped ringing since 4:02 this morning and you had done your best to do damage control. It didn’t help that this particular client had 20.4 million Instagram followers and the mainstream media alongside TMZ had already picked up the story by the time you were woken from a sound sleep to a panicked phone call from one of your client’s managers. A press conference had taken place a few hours later and of course, you were front and center, which you absolutely hated but had no choice in. So, today was not a good day by any means and you desperately needed some recharging time.
You huffed out an aggravated breath and spun on your heel, digging through your handbag to grab your cell. When you saw the name on the screen, you tensed up. Oh, your day was going to get even better apparently. Why hadn’t you just called out sick today and stayed in bed? Content to hide under the covers and pretend the world wasn’t exploding around you again? Because that worked so well for you last time. You pressed your lips together at the snarky thought. Shut up, brain.
Deciding that it was best just to see what he wanted and to get it over with, you swiped green and put the phone to your ear, forcing yourself to give a cordial greeting. “Hello?”
“Hey, it’s me.”
“I know.” You grabbed the dry cleaning and turned towards the hall closet. “What’s up?”
“I just wanted to…” You heard someone talking in the background and it made you freeze. Was that who you thought it was? Sure enough, he spoke again in a quieter tone. “I just wanted to see how you were doing.”
“How do you think I’m doing?” You snapped as you shoved the hook onto the bar and slammed the closet door shut, smirking in satisfaction when the sound echoed throughout the foyer. You knew he had heard that. “Is that her? Are you really calling me right now while she’s in the room?”
“What? No.” His voice always went an octave higher near the end of a sentence when he was nervous. “No, of course not.” You could hear the sounds of the person talking in the background fading as he presumably moved away from them. “No, Y/N, that’s someone from my team. We had a meeting and we’re taking a break.”
“Yeah, I’ll bet,” you hissed, picking up the grocery bags and moving towards the kitchen.
“It is.”
“Whatever,” you muttered, pulling packages of ground beef and raw steaks out and placing them in the refrigerator and freezer respectively. “I should expect nothing less.”
A sigh came down the line. “Y/N, I told you, I didn’t—”
“What did you call me for? I’m pretty sure I made it clear the last time we saw each other that I never wanted to hear from you again.”
Silence reigned for a moment while you continued putting your groceries away. Perhaps that was cruel but it was nothing but the truth. You had told your soon-to-be ex-husband that when he tried to speak to you outside the conference room as you and your lawyer attempted to leave the contentious meeting that hadn’t brought about any resolution. You were both trying to avoid going to court, wanting to settle this as soon as possible, but his lawyers were intent on playing hardball. Which was oh-so-hilarious considering he made more money in a single month than you did a year. And he had sat back, letting them, as he kept glistening green eyes fixated on you, urging you to look at him which you did not. When you told him you wanted nothing more to do with him, he appeared stricken and you felt sick seeing it, not just because you said what you’d said but also because you had meant it. You had trusted him, let him come in and sweep you off your feet though you kept insisting you didn’t want anything romantic to develop between you, but he had pushed for a relationship, you ended up giving in, and then he had crushed you underneath his boot heel without a second thought. He had told you he loved you over and over again, touched you as if he truly meant it, and then stabbed you right in the back. Just like your friends and everyone you knew who had a brain had warned you he would.
“I saw the press conference and I guess I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” he quietly admitted.
You couldn’t help but flinch. Great, he had seen you artlessly dodge the question about your own divorce and the catalyst behind it. And if he saw it, then that meant so did she. Great, just great.
“I’m fine. Better than fine, actually. So thanks for checking in but not necessary. Go back to your meeting and have a great rest of your day. Great rest of your life really. Ciao.” You were about to end the call when you heard him speaking suddenly.
“Don’t hang up. Y/N! Please. Can we just talk for one freaking second? Please.”
You flipped the call over to speakerphone and placed the device on the counter, crossing your arms and waiting. Sometimes it was truly hard to believe that you had been so in love with this man that you had shared a life with him once. That you had smiled when he would call you, that you had craved to hear his voice even. And now…now you had a knot in your stomach the size of Texas and you despised the owner of said voice.
When he didn’t say anything after a minute, you prompted him. “Well?”
“Please, can we just talk? You know, like we used to. We were friends once, weren’t we?”
You took two steps forward and bent at the waist to make sure your voice was as close as possible to the phone. “Like we’re friends? Are you for real? And let me just tell you that if you’re calling me to talk about your new relationship, you’d better think again. I will hang up and I will immediately contact my attorney and seek a no contact order.”
“What new relationship? I’m not in any relationship.”
“Fuck buddies, then. I don’t care what you call it.”
“That’s not—” He let out a groan of frustration. “Nothing happened, Y/N. Nothing. I keep trying to tell you that but you won’t listen!”
“Oh, so those photos and videos were just doctored then? Someone used PhotoShop or AI, right? All 62 people at the scene? They’re all lying? That’s what you’re telling me?”
You heard another sigh, this one sounding heavier, a mixture of exhaustion and defeat. “No, I’m not saying that. But I am saying that nothing—”
“Then we have nothing more to talk about.”
You were about to hang up when he pleaded again for you not to. “Would you please just listen to me for a second? I know I screwed up, I do. But nothing happened between me and her. I swear.”
“So the interview she gave to Vanity Fair where she implied how close you two were and the sources that told US Weekly about your incredibly passionate weekend in Rome last year when I couldn’t make the trip — with full detail of your very public displays of affection I might add — that was all a lie?”
“I never had a passionate weekend with her, Y/N. I called you that night, because I knew you would still be up working that case. We even—” He suddenly lowered his voice a little. “We even were intimate if you remember.”
Just when you thought all of this couldn’t hurt you anymore, that you shed every single tear your body was capable of creating, that your heart could no longer break because it was a pile of dust somewhere in this house, you felt the resurgence of a pain that you wished you didn’t know existed. A pain that stabbed into you over and over again, forcing you to feel every fresh wound along with old ones, nearly overwhelming you and making you feel like you would never get away from it. You remembered the night he was talking about all too well.
“No, that was the previous year. It was our anniversary,” you choked out, the age old lump forming once again in your throat. One you swore you wouldn’t allow back.
“What? No. Baby, I’m sorry but you’re wrong. It was that same night, I’m telling you. I know it was because I left the restaurant early to go back to my room so I could call you. I even texted you on the way there. I know I did.”
You closed your eyes as the pain washed over you once more. If you weren’t about to break for the thousandth time since this whole thing started, you would have reminded him what you’d told him when you’d agreed to date him. Never lie to a lawyer about anything because they will find out. He had simply smiled, told you that neither of you would ever have to worry about that, and leaned in to kiss you. If you didn’t feel a sudden burning in the corner of your eyes, you also would have reminded him that he had tried to tell you this story once before and you had easily debunked it. And he had the nerve to speak to you like that as he lied to you once again, as if you were still happily married? As if he had the right to call you baby? No, this was too much.
“I’m hanging up now,” you forced out.
“Honey, please. Can’t we just talk this out? I know I fucked up but I promise I didn’t—”
“Don’t call me again. If you need something in the future, have your lawyer contact mine.”
“Y/N, wait! Baby, please just—”
You disconnected the call, took a deep breath, and went back to your task. Your phone immediately started ringing again and seeing your ex’s name once more, you pushed the call to voicemail and then turned your phone off. You had enough for today; you deserved some quiet time. And the last thing you wanted to deal with was the cause of the void sitting inside your chest where your heart used to be. Though that empty space didn’t seem to prevent the tidal wave of pain you were currently under. You continued taking deep breaths until you felt you had yourself fully under control and there was no longer any threat of you breaking down in sobs.
You heard the clicking of nails on the tile and turned around to see Milo sitting down, watching you intently and letting out a whine.
“Don’t you dare take his side,” you whispered, afraid if you spoke any louder that you might finally shatter into a thousand pieces after everything today. You were already going to be indulging in a liquid dinner as it was. Alcohol would be the only thing your stomach would be able to handle right now. “He left us, remember?”
The dog simply tilted his head in response and you snorted. “Right, I keep forgetting. All dogs stick together, don’t they?” He didn’t understand your snarky comment and he just continued watching you, not making a sound. It reminded you too much of your husband for some reason, giving you those infamous sad puppy dog eyes of his as he begged you to give him a chance to explain when you played a video on your phone that had been sent to you. You bit your lip and focused on pulling a bottle of wine from the undercounter cooler. “Don’t look at me like that. I didn’t make him do what he did. I didn’t lie or cheat or…anything else he did. Okay?” Still no response. “It’s not my fault. I’m not the bad guy here.” Still nothing. Not that you were expecting a response but the longer the silence lasted, the more pain you felt. “Fine, you want to blame me? Go right ahead. Everyone else in the world does, why not you, too?”
You passed him by and you heard another whine, but you ignored it. You clenched your jaw, making your way back into the foyer to remove your shoes and jog up the stairs to change. You pretended that the sudden blurriness in your eyes was your exhaustion from the day and that the tears rolling down your cheeks were just from allergies, nothing to do with the pain you were feeling hearing his voice again — the voice of your cheating ex-husband. Not at all.
You were bored, channel surfing, as Milo laid next to you, his head on his paws. Both of you stared at the TV screen but you weren’t really seeing the constantly changing images. Instead, you had your head in your hand, turning his words from earlier over and over in your mind.
“Nothing happened, Y/N.”
“I promise I didn’t—”
“Nothing happened between me and her.”
If only there wasn’t physical evidence to the contrary. If only he hadn’t lied and was still lying. You reached for your glass from the side table and took another sip. You had foregone the wine in favor of something with a little more kick. You intended on drinking until you became so drunk you would have no choice but not to care. You had already let your assistant know to clear your morning appointments before your second drink; you were now on your fourth.
So when an hour later, you were watching some wildlife documentary on BBC and you saw a female bear running from a male bear who was intent on mating with her, you slammed your glass down and sat up, causing Milo to lift his head up. “That’s right, run!” You yelled, slightly slurring your words. “Fucking run! Don’t trust him! He’ll tell you whatever you wanna hear just to get you on your back! Or your front or however the fuck you bears do it! But then he’ll wander off to find some other bitch to mount when he’s done! Mark my words! So you fucking run and you don’t look back! Fuck you, Baloo! Bare necessities, my ass! RUN!”
The female bear did run and she definitely put the male through it but eventually, she allowed him to catch up with her and gave in. You groaned loudly and threw the popcorn you had been munching on at the TV. “You’ve gotta be fuckin’ kiddin’ me! I told that bitch to run! Doesn’t she realize he’s only going to screw her and then really screw her? Nobody listens to me!” Milo jumped down to eat the stray pieces and when he turned to look at you, you shook your head. “I’m tellin’ you, buddy. Dogs. All o’ya.” He tilted his head curiously, his eyes laser focused on the bowl in your lap. You blew a raspberry at the TV when the narrator said the female bear would eventually give birth to cubs in months’ time. “You just wait until he takes a trip to Italy, I’m tellin’ ya. You’ll be sorry you didn’t listen to me then.” For a reason that wasn’t quite clear to you in this state, you threw more popcorn at the screen when a pair of mated penguins appeared next, waiting for their egg to hatch. You blew another raspberry and Milo immediately went on a popcorn rampage, all too happy to act as the cleanup crew.
You sipped more scotch from your glass and you loved the trail of the burn it left from your tongue to your stomach. This was an excellent decision on your part. You needed a break from your chaotic everyday life, your broken heart, and…memories.
Memories like him sitting on this couch with you as you watched Working Girl for the 4,085th time.
It was one of your favorite movies and even though he was sick of it, he indulged your need for the familiar comfort it provided. You had a rough day at work, you and your mother had gotten into yet another argument over the phone, and your doctor had pretty much told you that your getting pregnant would be an impossibility. You were devastated and you were working up the courage to tell him, already not having told him about the existence of your appointment. He wasn’t really sure if he wanted kids but you did; you had always wanted a little girl. So you both eventually compromised that you would give it a shot and if it happened, great. If it didn’t, then you would cross that bridge when you came to it. That was the deal. But when you failed to get pregnant the past few months despite you both doing everything in your power to make it happen, you’d grown concerned and decided to get an official medical opinion on you first before asking him to. Sure enough, the news had crushing. At some point over time, after all of the monthly hell it put you through since you were thirteen, your traitorous reproductive system had decided to clock out and refused to clock back in when it was needed.
So when you finally felt brave enough to tell him what you’d been told, that you wouldn’t break down in tears as you said the words, you noticed he wasn’t paying attention to the movie at all or you. He was on his phone and even when you called his name, trying to get him to look at you, he barely spared you a glance. When you asked him what he was doing, he said he had gotten some texts he was responding to, still not really looking at you. When you asked who they were from, a strange look fleeted across his face before he powered down his screen and slipped his phone back into his pocket.
He had then turned a reassuring smile on you. “Just work stuff.” He laid a hand on your shoulder and tenderly rubbed his thumb in soothing circles. “So what is it you want to tell me?”
You arched a brow over at him. You hadn’t said you wanted to tell him anything.
He inclined his head towards the screen. “Working Girl? For the second time in two weeks? Something’s up.”
Dammit, he knew you too well. Something that had always been a plus in your relationship, especially since you two had shared a close friendship first. But while you had been finally ready to tell him your heartbreaking news, something about that look and his evading the question of who he had been texting now had you clamming up though you had no idea why. Or maybe you did but you didn’t want to think about it or look at it too closely. “Nothing,” you answered quietly, glancing back at the movie. “Just a rough day at work.”
“Anything you want to talk about?”
You shook your head and bit your lip. “No, I’m good.”
He studied you for a moment and nodded, accepting your answer before getting to his feet. “Alright, well, I’ve already seen this seventy eight times and that was before our first date.” He chuckled at his own joke. “So, I’m going to jump in the shower and then head to bed. Come up when you’re finished?” You forced a smile and a nod. He leaned down and kissed the top of your head before leaving the room.
When he was gone and you heard the sounds of the shower upstairs start up, you sat frozen. You told yourself you were overthinking things and it made sense that if he thought something was bothering you, he wouldn’t want to start going into detail on a work-related project that either might be going great or not going so well. Not until he knew what was going on with you first. But you were also a divorce attorney and a woman — you knew the signs. You didn’t want to think that your husband — your best friend — would do that to you, especially knowing how much of a dealbreaker it was for you. You’d been very vocal about it before agreeing to date him. He wouldn’t really do that to you, would he?
You’d shrugged it off, telling yourself you were being ridiculous, and turned the movie off before heading upstairs to bed. And when he scrolled through social media before sleep, smirking at the screen and typing something when he thought you were already out, you told yourself you were overreacting. And when a brief look of relief flashed in his eyes when you finally told him your doctor’s verdict a week later before he pulled you into a hug, you ignored your hurt and told yourself it was only because he had been up front with you about not really wanting kids at this stage of his life. That he had only compromised on trying to begin with in order to make you happy.
You should’ve known then what your instincts had been screaming at you. Just like that damn bear should have known. What this goddamn penguin should know. You blew another raspberry for good measure when the narrator said the male was attempting to attract the female by building a fucktastic nest. You weren’t exactly sure that’s what the narrator said but it was all the same shit to you. “Run, girl. That’s how they getcha,” you muttered, your slurring somehow worse as you sifted through popcorn. “He’s only trying to get in them panties. Trust me. Fly away — or waddle away very fast.” You laughed at your own joke and threw Milo a few pieces. He snatched them in mid-air, impressing you and making you clap happily for him. His tail wagged a thousand miles an hour as he waited for more snacks.
And then someone decided to ruin your little pity party. Milo’s head in the opposite direction and he suddenly took off for the front door, barking like crazy and making you jump. A moment later, the doorbell rang and your cell phone chimed with the Ring notification. You glanced at the time on your screen; who the hell would be at your door at this hour? You quickly checked the Ring camera, your heart rate accelerating slightly as Milo’s barking didn’t let up. Were you about to be attacked? Broken into? Scammed? Given the Good Word and a talk on how to achieve your salvation? What? And you were drunk — fffffuck.
You waited for the screen to pop up and when it did, your heart was pounding for a whole other reason. You could feel the fury racing through your veins like wildfire. You’d know that set of shoulders and ball cap anywhere. Was this for real?
You watched as the person at your front door pressed the doorbell again, giving a hesitant wave to the camera. A familiar voice suddenly sounded through the speakers on your phone. “I know you’re home, Y/N. I can hear Milo barking. Can you come to the door, please?”
Oh, he wanted you to come to the door? Not a problem. He was going to regret it, though.
You jumped to your feet, you being the one to immediately regret it instead as you held onto the arm of the couch to regain your balance. When you didn’t fall back onto the couch or onto the floor, you stormed into the foyer — well, you tried to storm into it anyway. Milo was there, half whining, half barking, and glancing back and forth between you and the front door, clearly wanting you to open it. You reached it, flipped the locks, and threw the door open, glaring at the last person you ever wanted to see darken your doorway again. “What the hell do you want?”
Your ex-husband looked shocked for a moment, more by what his assessing gaze took in of you than by your aggressive greeting. “Have you been drinking?”
You snorted a laugh. “You’re going to ask me that? Really? You?” You shot him a meaningful look.
He had the decency to briefly appear ashamed as he should. Hadn’t that been one of the several excuses he’d thrown your way once his dastardly deeds had come to light? God, you’d lost count of them at this point. “I was hoping we could talk but if…” He gestured to you with a hand but didn’t finish the sentence. He didn’t need to; you knew very well what he was implying and it just served to anger you further.
“Are you kidding me right now? You don’t just show up on my doorstep—”
“Our doorstep.”
“My doorstep,” you corrected. “Out of the blue, wanting to talk. It’s no longer about what you want, anyway.”
“Y/N, please. Can we just—”
“No! You hear me? N-O. No!” You went to shut the door when he stopped you.
“I’ve been trying to call you all day, you won’t return my calls, you won’t answer my texts.”
“Gee, I wonder why, Cheater McCheaterson,” you hissed, attempting to close the door despite him holding it open.
He let out an irritated sigh. “Look, I just want to talk, Y/N. No lawyers, no third parties, no more phone hang ups or emails not responded to — just us.”
You shoved against the door with all of your might though it proved futile. Why did he have to be so big and why did he have to show up when you were three—four—five sheets to the wind? “Like I’ve said a hundred thousand times before, there is nothing to talk about.” You spun around and pushed your back against the door, trying to shut him out that way. The damn thing still didn’t budge and you were starting to lose the battle with your balance. Milo watched you and you could see the judgment in his dark brown eyes; even he knew the door wasn’t going to close and the man you’d once given your heart to wasn’t going to go away that easily. “You cheated, you lied, you got caught, we’re getting divorced. End. Of. Story,” you grunted as you uselessly pushed against the door. That whole spiel might have sounded more impressive had you not just slurred your way through about ninety percent of it.
A hand reached around and gently laid on top of yours, causing you to stop pushing and look down. Tears began to build in your eyes when you saw an all-too familiar golden band on the fourth finger, feeling the cold metal against your skin, almost burning you when the memory of you putting it on his hand immediately popped into your head.
He had graced you with a warm and affectionate smile as you repeated the vows you were told to say. “To love and to cherish, ‘till death do us part,” you finished, slipping the ring onto his finger and joining your hands as practiced. His smile grew and he didn’t even wait for the officiant to finish speaking before he leaned forward and kissed you, causing a lot of ‘awww’s and laughter from the audience. He had then placed his forehead against yours, staring into your eyes and looking beyond happy. As it so often did for you when he did things like this, the world around you faded away until it was just the two of you.
“We’re married now,” he murmured. “No returns or refunds or exchanges. No take backs. It’s for real.”
“I must have missed that part of the vows,” you joked, wrapping your arms around his neck as your eyes roamed his handsome face. He gently nudged your nose in response. “Yes, it’s for real,” you capitulated. “Not a bad choice for my first husband, if I do say so myself.” You shot him a teasing grin.
He chuckled and your heart skipped a beat; you loved that sound. “You mean your only husband, right?” He growled out playfully before swooping down to kiss you more passionately than before as he wrapped his arms around your waist to pick you up. You laughed into his mouth and you could faintly hear the sounds of cheering, whistles, and clapping somewhere in the distance.
You pressed your lips together to keep yourself from breaking down in tears. How dare he still wear that thing? After he’d pledged to love you for the rest of your lives together, no matter what? To be faithful to you even? You snatched your hand from underneath his and pushed the wood again, grunting loudly.
“Sweetheart—”
“Don’t you dare,” you hissed.
His face appeared next, a lot closer to you than you had anticipated, and it took everything you had to keep standing. You could see devastation in those green depths that closely mirrored your own, the bloodshot eyes staring back at you along with a hint of dark circles underneath indicating to you that there had been a sleepless night or two very recently. His skin was at least two shades lighter than what it should be and his usually neatly trimmed beard was not as well kept. How dare he? How dare he look so hurt when he was the offending party? When he was the reason behind all of this pain he had caused you both?
“Please, honey,” he murmured. “Talk to me.”
Your jaw clenched and you felt a tear start rolling down your cheek. Dammit, you had told yourself you would never cry in front of him, not after what he’d done. You would never give him the satisfaction of knowing just how deeply he hurt you. “I don’t want to talk to you, Jensen.” The pain in his expression intensified but you willfully ignored it. You also ignored the oh-so-ironically timed whine Milo let out nearby. “So just leave already. We’re done and nothing you say is ever going to change that.” You roughly wiped away the tear and ambled down the hall to the guest bathroom, slamming and locking the door shut behind you without once looking back.
Only when you turned on the shower did you collapse on the floor, your back to the tub, and bury your face into your knees as you broke down into sobs. You’d meant what you said; you and Jensen were done, and nothing he said could ever change that. Just when you thought your heart was beyond the ability of being damaged anymore than it already had been, you felt one final crack form as you poured out your anguish into the small tiled room.
A/N: Jensen disclaimer here. Btw, I am not suggesting anything about Jensen himself, his marriage or previous relationships, or anything related. I only chose "Jensen" because that character seemed to fit the themes I wanted to cover best. At first, I was going for Beau but then that didn't work for obvious reasons. Then Dean but again, didn't work. Ultimately, it ended up being "Jensen" in the end aka "just right". For story purposes, "Jensen" is not a parent when he meets the reader.
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Pen pals AU and Oblivious John in the club
Hello :)
The Pen Pals AU is brand spanky new and only really has a premise right now:
Gale never enlisted. Perhaps because of a medical issue or a legal one (both related to his dad), he's ineligible for the armed forces. But at home he works maybe in a munitions factory, or in some other role related to the war effort.
He reads an ad one day about a writing programme looking for volunteers to write letters to servicemen and women overseas who don't have anyone else to write to them. He sees it as another way to help, and signs up.
Bucky meanwhile, hates mail days. He's just reminded that no one at home wants to write to him. Harding tells him about the programme and wants Bucky to sign up to it 'as an example to the boys', and he's reluctant but agrees.
Everyone else who's signed up is excited to get a letter from a pretty girl back home, and John kinda assumes that's who's going to be writing to him: a woman. When he gets a letter from someone called Gale, he's surprised by how much he enjoys reading it, enjoys writing letters back, and anticipates the letters coming in.
A Clegan fall in love over letters AU, essentially!
Oblivious John
Again this is more a premise atm with a few notes scribbled down.
Ever since they became best friends during training, Gale trusted John with his secret - that he's gay. John vowed to keep that secret and Gale safe. He's never bothered too much about who people take to bed, and he's not about to start now.
On some down time (during or after war, can't decide), John agrees to go to a queer club with Gale. Gale sees how much other people can't take their eyes off John, and for someone who was such a hit with the Red Cross girls and women in the dance halls they usually frequent, John just does not realise how much attention he's getting.
Cue Gale having to explain to John when someone's flirting with him and why. AKA: is it gay to admit to your friend that's he's so very hot by explaining that half the room wants to fuck him?
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drown in your body ; rick flag x reader (ft benny miller)
summary: Benny knows he can only appreciate you from afar for so long, and despite his biggest threats, specifically, your husband and Benny’s own questionable morals, he can’t help but take a quick peek.
warnings: smut (minors DNI!), possessive af!Rick vs pervy af!Benny (whew)
a/n: everyone say tq to drown by Baekhyun because I was able to conclude the year by choosing violence and write this piece about Rick blowing your back, from the pov our fav menace <3 don’t forget to leave some sugar! ᐠ( ᐛ )ᐟ
» j.k. m.list (series under 'rick flag vs the triple frontier boys'), or check out my full m.list!
» smut includes; unprotected & kinda rough sex, spanking, voyeurism, dirty talking, possessive & kinky Rick vs pervy & kinky Benny 🧎🏻♀️, kinda dark but not really?? they just really kinky fr fr
'Then again, what's the harm in just a quick peek and run, right?' ;
Benny knew he had reached a different kind of low just by doing this.
He didn't mean to, at first.
All he tried to do was pass you the mail that had been mistakenly sent to their house. The package looked pretty important, judging by the sheer size of it, so he thought to give it to you directly rather than leaving it on your porch.
He knocked, and knocked, and knocked, but no one answered. Not you, not Rick, not even the cat that loves to visit your house every other day. He had no reason to try and turn the doorknob, but he definitely wasn't expecting it to be unlocked. Whether his reason for trespassing had anything to do with stubbornness or worry, the latter because he feared something had happened to you, was uncertain, but the package in his hands was no longer his priority at the moment.
No, it was the distant moan coming from upstairs.
It should've been his cue to scram, to pray that you or Rick had forgotten about whether or not one of you brought the mail in, to control his sick curiousity and avoid getting killed.
Literally.
But, oh, those noises were so tempting, so melodious, so needy. He only realized his feet were moving on their own when he reached the bottom of the stairs. He didn't move for a hot minute, mentally arguing with his inner demons for being so depraved for you the way he is. Or maybe, it was the fact that he could hear Rick's grunts in between your yelps.
Will would have his head for this.
But, who's to say Santi and Frankie wouldn't do the same either?
Then again, what's the harm in just a quick peek and run, right?
Well, everything. He could be dead on the spot.
He's seen the displays of affection you two have for each other, Rick doing so to spite the group as well but as much as Benny hated to admit it, he could see the true love both of you shared. He was grateful you found happiness just as he was disheartened that that happiness wasn't him.
But, as long as your husband was treating you well, then why should he complain? And judging by the sounds you're making upstairs, he definitely was.
He sighed, knowing he was a lost cause when he slowly ascended the stairs, testing any parts of the thread that could give him away with unnecessary creaks. He even held onto the handrails like a lifeline, but
The sight in the hallway brought him to a halt— eyeing the dress that lay on the floor slowly filled him with anticipation. Rick's suit jacket was barely hanging on the console table but what caught his eyes was the flimsy material peeking out of the pocket.
Your lacey panties.
Oh, Benny knew he was done for.
He quickly tried to navigate the room before he could even think about the idea of snatching for future use, his only guide was the noises coming from the bedroom, which was at the other end of the floor. Benny had no one to blame but himself, giving in to his curiousity and investigating like an airheaded character in a horror movie.
The closer he got to the door, the smaller his steps became, fearing that one bold movie would give his position away and have his funeral right then and there. And yet, his possible fate didn't steer him from his goal, his cock growing harder since his less-than-welcomed arrival.
And lo and behold, he reached the jackpot. His heart was racing faster than he thought was healthy, but just as he was thinking with his dick, he peeked. Despite the pep talks he gave himself, he could've given himself away when he nearly choked at the sight he was blessed with.
With your face nuzzling the blankets and ass up, Rick relentlessly thrust his hips into yours. He threw his head back, sliding his hand up and down the perfect curve of your spine before smacking your pretty ass. Hard. Each spank he presented drew little yelps out of you, the man above towering over you chuckling darkly every time you did.
Oh, what he wouldn't do to have you underneath him.
The dazed look on your face as you bite into the sheets was hypnotizing. Those sweet red lips that he wants to both kiss and see wrapped around his cock. Just as Benny began palming his cock over his sweatpants, he then noticed your bounded hands, the silky royal blue material was likely Rick's tie. He patted himself on the back, his speculation of you and Rick celebrating what was likely your anniversary was brief when his attention reverted back to your fists, flexing helplessly as Rick picked up the pace.
And to think he once found you intimidating. But just like the first time he met you all those years ago, he still found you very, very hot.
"Rick..!" His name and whatever incoherent nonsense you were trying to tell him were all you could say, as if your brain had into mush, which, frankly, it had. He cooed almost condescendingly dipping his head next to yours. Though his wet hair gave Benny little to know information about what he was whispering about but judging by your little whimpers, it was probably just as obscene as the sounds of his hips slamming against yours.
"Fuck," He growled, snapping his hips when you bucked yours, "You know exactly what you're doing to me, clenching on my cock like that. Dirty girl, aren't ya?"
"I-I am!" You whined, releasing the sheets out of your lips with the lewdest expression Benny's ever seen, "Y-Your dirty girl!"
Fuck.
To have you react in such a way, to be the one to pull himself back just enough to surprise you when he trusts back into you, feeling those tight walls flex around him.
That wet pussy of yours was practically calling him in like a siren.
He could imagine how soaked you were. He’d go as far as licking the sheets if he had to. All for just a taste. Fucker probably gets to taste you every day, Benny thought with great displeasure, and who was he kidding, he probably did.
Benny bit down on the collar of his shirt at the same time your pitch grew higher. He wanted to scream—he couldn’t groan in your ears the way he wanted to, he couldn’t cum all over your beautiful body the way he needed, and he most certainly couldn’t have you the way he yearned for. He couldn’t get too lost in the moment and yet, he was glued to the spot. You were close, and so was Benny, and he knew he couldn’t stay for long. No, it was too risky to stay till the very end.
Just as he questioned his chances yet again, something, or rather, someone threw all of his thoughts out of the window.
“Ain’t she a sight for sore eyes?”
Benny stilled, the heartbeat in his ears was suddenly the loudest it's ever been. He should’ve just run, but being the typical stubborn man he was, he slowly looked back, seeing not just Rick, but you look up at the half-opened door. Through your tears of pleasure, you stared back at the man with wide eyes, but your husband, on the other hand, looked like he was ready to commit a murder, like a bull seeing red and wanted nothing more than to hunt the poor fuckers down. You gasped, teeth grazing the sensitive part of your shoulder before angling his thrusts, effortlessly hitting your sweet spot.
"Better close the door on your way out, kid."
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» gorgeous rose divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics ♡
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ive seen that all of your bookmarks are tskym and you dont have many of them (not that thats a bad thing!!!) could you give a bookmark tour and like give a reveiw of each?
ofc! tsukkiyama bookmark tour begin!
autumn by windofjune - this fic is ongoing but i'm just totally in love with the author's writing style. essentially, tsukishima and yamaguchi have had mutual feelings for a long time, but nothing was ever acted upon, so in college, they begin to drift apart from one another even when living in the same apartment. tsukishima faces an injury to his knee and yamaguchi gets dumped by his boyfriend, leading to their slow-burning reconciliation as they both recover from their emotional and physical injuries. everything is so beautifully written and i'm not-so-patiently waiting for chapter 8 hehe
Sleeping Habits by BlueColoredDreams - piece written in a series of vignettes as tsukishima and yamaguchi grow older, ending in their high school years. very sweet and very fluffy. i'm a snuggler, so any fic that involves sleeping and cuddling, i'm there.
(Not) A bad day by WhereDoesTheTimeGo - yamaguchi has a bad day, and all of his insecurities bubble up, so tsukishima comforts him. they both have their own self-doubts and insecurities unveiled, but everything's okay with a snuggle and first kiss. you will notice there is a pattern in my fic tastes, lol.
Home Is Where The Heart Is by Pepper_Moon - very short and sweet domestic fic about the two moving in together in a cottage in the countryside after marrying. artist yamaguchi and writer tsukishima. SO COTTAGECORE. the author is also currently writing a chaptered piece for day 1 of tsukkiyama week i'm very much looking forward to reading!
just ourselves by beefybuttlord - another short and sweet fic where hinata asks yamaguchi what his relationship with tsukishima really is. essentially it's a "what are we" fic. puts how i think their canon relationship is in 800 words.
hottaru-kun by palebluestings - very much plays around with the significance of names and naming conventions in japanese culture, and the different ways kanji can be read. tsukishima has started calling yamaguchi 'tadashi', but yamaguchi still calls him 'tsukki'. also, cue tsukishima being a little jealous of yamaguchi hanging out with his brother. it's a cute and thoughtful fic.
The sign on your heart said it's still reserved for me. by yamaguchiforpresident - as they get older, yamaguchi gets more and more attention from girls (and guys), and by their third year, tsukishima realizes he's in love with his best friend. lots of pining from tsukishima, and does he do anything about it? hmmm... a little bit of yamayama (at least from tsukishima's perspective), so yet again, jealous tsukishima >:)
Won't You Stay For The Ride? (The Views Will Be Nice) by xxet - self-hating tsukishima begins to have his walls broken down by yamaguchi as they grow up. tsukishima is totally whipped, and everyone knows. flips back and forth between past and present throughout. good mix of fluff and angst.
i wish to be found by TheFledglingDM - ok this one isn't in my bookmarks but i'm actually obsessed with this fic i'm shocked i didn't bookmark it. essentially a 'You've Got Mail' au, where yamaguchi is a small bookstore owner who took it over after his mother passed and tsukishima is a financial executive for a chain bookstore with aspirations to become a published author. when tsukishima helps to make the decision to put a store location near yamaguchi's bookstore, yamaguchi fears he may be put out of business. unknowingly, for a whole year prior, they've been online best friends over discord. mistaken identity, enemies to lovers, influence of and allusions to pride & prejudice, what more could you want from a fic? so skillfully written. i will never shut up about it. i finished it a month ago and i think about it every other day.
hope you enjoyed my thoughts on these fics! honestly, i haven't been reading many fics recently since life got pretty busy and then that makes me pretty tired and i've been very focused on writing my own fics...but! with all the entries for tsukkiyama week i have so much new content to read. i'm still pretty new to ao3 (it's been a little over a year since i started reading fics on there), so that kind of explains why my bookmarks list is pretty short, and also i tend to bounce between different forms of reading like manga to physical books to fanfiction. kind of just depends on what my mood is at the moment. now that i've started writing, i've really been fueling my tsukkiyama brainrot into that, lol. when it's slow at work, i'm collecting ideas in my brain for them.
bottomline: tsukkiyama will always and forever be my #1, so if there's a fic i'm reading it and if they have zero fans, i'm dead.
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Forget any idea you had for Thomas stories, I wanna see the engines and the narrator interacting with each other for some sort of April fools themed episode. All the dialogue between them is snarky and sassy just like in season one…but it’s cranked up to 11. Or maybe even have the engines are self-aware that they’re in a tv show???
Just...imagine for a moment what that would be like.
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Narrator: “This Is Thomas! He’s a cheeky little engine who has a short stumpy funnel, a short stumpy dome, and a short stumpy-“
Thomas: “WE GET IT. I’M SMALL. By my maker Is that really the only thing you can describe me as?!”
Narrator: “No, actually! I forgot to mention he has a temper of one of those small rat dogs that women keep in their purses and treat them like children! Why one could argue that he has the temper of a rooster!”
Thomas: “THATS IT-”
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Percy: "Hey Thomas, I'm supposed to go to the works at 5, could you cover for my mail train?"
Narrator: "This made Thomas very cross, he told Percy that he should do his own work and-"
Thomas: "Oh of course! Is it just the regular route?"
Narrator: "Wait no, that's not what you're supposed to-"
Percy: "Yep! My driver can come with you if you'd like!"
Thomas: "If he wouldn't mind coming along with us. I'd hate to make your train late."
Narrator: "Stop that-"
Percy: "Thanks Thomas, I really appreciate it. I'll leave the train near the sheds when I have to leave."
Thomas, very smuggly: Oh it's nothing, really! Anything for my best friend!"
Narrator: "STOP!"
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Narrator: “And then there was trouble!”
Edward, rapidly descending down Gordon’s hill and becoming a runaway: “Oh of course there’s trouble! Why wouldn’t there be trouble WHEN ISNT THERE TROUBLE-“
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Percy, late at night: “Where do you think that voice in the sky goes when we all go to sleep? Does he have a home to go to?”
Edward: "Hmm...I'm not sure. Maybe he goes to a shed just like us!"
James: “Oh please, If he spends all of his free time with us, I doubt he even has a bed let alone a shed!"
Narrator: “I’m still here, you know!”
*cue ungodly screeching*
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Henry, after having yet another derailment this week: “Do we really need to have an accident every episode??? Is it really that vital to this forsaken franchise to have some large an monumental crash every day???”
Gordon, using his winch to help Henry: “No, but it would be rather dull if Thomas didn’t fling himself headfirst into a fistfight every two minutes, wouldn’t you agree dear?”
Henry: “…Fine, your right…but it wouldn’t hurt to pick on someone else every now and again would it?!
*a hearty laughter from Gordon ensues*
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Duck: "Does anyone ever think about what that voice in the sky is? Like...Is it a man? Is it an engine? A God?"
Thomas: "I...never actually thought about that."
Gordon: "I just assumed he was a result of being on this accursed island for so long. I'm surprised that we can hear him but the humans can't...it's quite concerning if you ask me!"
Percy: "Maybe he is a God! An Engine God!"
Gordon: "Oh now look what you've started!"
Edward: "Hold on now, I think he's onto something!"
Thomas: "W-what do we do with this? What can we do with this?"
Edward: "Well, we can tell it to others! Like how the priests do for churches!"
Percy: "What about those cerci-moneys? I heard that humans do those for their Gods!"
Duck: "Maybe we should name him first! It's only proper!"
Gordon: "STOP ENCOURAGING HIM!"
Narrator: *holding in his laughter*
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since you want more kunichuu: 2, 6 & 11 for the ask + your fluffiest & silliest hcs for them <3
hehehe HELLO!!
2. What their love letters look like
so fucking cheesy it is disgusting. i like to think chuuya mails kunikida letters along with the random gifts he sends him like: hi pretty boy <3 these are for you! hope work is going well xoxo. and then kunikida reuses those letters by turning them into flowers or something similar and gifting them to chuuya when they get home
6. How they decorated their bedroom
chuuya being a neat hoarder is important to me. their bedroom has so much clutter. it drove kunikida a little crazy at first but then he got used to it and started adding even more things. they’re both sentimental losers so lots of photos and mementos (movie tickets, keychains, postcards etc). also kunikida gifted chuuya a tiny dog plushie and it sits on their massive bed, tucked in every morning
11. What their first impression was of each other
kunikida: mafia executive nakahara chuuya. i need to be wary of him. he is, as i’ve heard, feisty and feral and has a huge temper and. oh, he’s smiling. he’s kind of cute. NO—
chuuya: stuck-up. boring. agency’s second in command. tf is he so tall for. dazai’s new partner UGH whatever. i dont even care— why the HELL did he just blow up!!!! …why was that kind of cool. fuck????
aaand have some pre-dating but definitely pining hcs because i am WEAK!!
chuuya had that childish urge to tug on kunikida’s ponytail one (1) time. yes they gave in. no they didn’t regret it
kunikida HATES that kenji and chuuya get along so well. until he saw chuuya genuinely laughing with kenji, to which he dropped his pen over it and it stopped working forever
neither of them are very touchy before dating, but it is noted that they shake hands after joint meetings a little longer than necessary
kunikida had a nose piercing that closed up and when chuuya found out they got stars in their eyes
chuuya didn’t know how to deal with his feelings at first. cue to a LOT of pacing on the ceiling and cursing kunikida out
after the initial disapproval, kunikida gained a lot of respect for chuuya and speaks of them highly. in a Purely Civil And Work-Appropriate Way of course
they went to karaoke for whatever reason with some other characters. chuuya sang a romantic rock ballad while looking straight into his eyes and kunikida had to leave the room
chuuya, after a meeting: of course, pretty boy. see you next time [insert cool wave and wink]
chuuya, the moment kunikida is out of sight: ?;!;!;&(!&.:!;& WHY DID I SAY THAT
kunikida is terrible at understanding pick up lines. chuuya thought he was just rejecting him really nicely. until they start dating and they brought it up and kunikida is like ?? you were FLIRTING?? and chuuya’s like ?? YOU COULDN’T TELL???
i dont know how to end this so last one: chuuya offhandedly mentions some complicated math equation he does for his ability to work and kunikida falls in love
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Yesterday I had two ideas for a steddie fic, so you'll be getting two updates from me today...
The first one is a modern (ish it would be set in the 80s) day Pride & Prejudice with Steve as Darcy, Robin as Bingley, and Eddie as Lizzy. Chrissy as Jane. Probably Billy as Wickham.
Nancy as Lady Catherine, but in the way that she's the catalyst at the end that comes up to Steve and tells him he can't date Eddie. Not because Eddie isn't in love with him, but no, because she thinks Steve is straight.
Cue Steve rushing to Eddie to tell him he still loved him.
Not sure where the rest of the gang would filter through. But none of them are related to each other like they are in the book.
I think Vickie would be a great Charlotte though. Deciding to be with someone she doesn't love because she doesn't think she can be with the one she wants because they're (Robin) out of her league.
The scene that gets Eddie to hate him on sight is they're at a party and he overhears Robin and Steve talking and Steve's too embarrassed to go on to the dance floor so he keeps making excuses. Tells her that Chrissy is the only pretty one there. Which Robin calls him out on because Eddie is soooo his type.
Steve scoffs and calls him cute at best.
Now Eddie who has carefully constructed his image to metal thinks that cute is the antithesis of that and gets offended.
Then in comes Billy and starts bad mouthing Steve. Saying all sorts of bullshit that Eddie just eats right up. Flirted with a 14 year old girl (Max and Steve was protecting her from Billy), deliberately threw a basketball game (had gotten a concussion and instead of continuing to play like the coach wanted went to the ER instead), and the list goes on about how miserable Steve has made Billy's life.
Chrissy doesn't believe it because the guys on the basketball team the following year love Steve. But Eddie thinks they were tricked by the King Steve image.
Robin isn't any help regarding the rumors because she wasn't friends with Steve until after all that went down and she wasn't in marching band that year, her parents couldn't pay for the uniform.
I know I know Bingley is the rich one and Jane is the poor one, but work with me here, it's based on personality. Robin isn't naive enough to be Jane.
Anyway.
Steve is oblivious to the drama going on around him because he's trying keep Max out of Billy's hands, as he took custody of her after her mom was unable. And dorky as hell.
He accidentally breaks up Robin and Chrissy with a remark about how Chrissy didn't seem all that interested in her (she was being shy Robin being her first girlfriend and didn't know how to act).
So when Steve asks Eddie out (at party hosted by Nancy that Eddie was trying to duck out of when Steve spotted him), Eddie flips out on Steve throwing all sorts of allegations around and Steve is devastated. He leaves this long voice mail on Eddie's phone explaining his side of the story and Eddie is gutted.
Steve really was a cool guy. But it's too late. Steve has gone back to Indy with Robin as they both nurse their broken hearts.
Chrissy goes to stay with her brother in Bloomington and the band takes Eddie to Indy not realizing that's where Steve's gone.
Their van breaks down near Steve's place and while they're stuck in town waiting until it gets fixed Steve and Eddie get thrown together a lot and Eddie falls head over heels.
Just as things are getting good between them, Eddie's van is fixed and Wayne tells him to haul ass because Billy has been threatening the Hellfire kiddos about Max's location.
Steve comes rushing to the rescue and gets a plate to the head for his trouble, but because of all the witnesses, Billy is forced to run, leaving everyone safe at last.
But Steve tells the kiddos not tell Eddie it was him that rescued Lucas and Max, thinking that Eddie still hated him.
Steve helps get Robin and Chrissy back together and now Eddie done for. He's in love with this man.
Cue the Nancy scene and Steve and Eddie finally getting together.
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So Al post always have to make sure she the centre of attention on Ms big night which doesn't come as a shock in that photo michael look tense and stiff and where the smile it exactly same as the other he pulls when he with her georgia one on seems more general and supportive of her friend and husband best friend then his actual parter
Would love to hear ur thoughts on this one
Hi there! Well, my DMs have been blowing up all afternoon about these various posts, and...yeah. A lot to unpack here, for sure.
It's interesting to see the use of two very different pictures here--one posed, one a candid pic/selfie--and how that frames everything else that is going on, and highlights several contrasts that are much too great to ignore.
Perhaps the most significant contrast is that in the posed photo, Michael and AL are barely touching, and the photographer seems to have made the choice not to pose them like a couple. There is also no apparent "pull" that is unconsciously bringing them together, in spite of whatever direction they might've been given. In the picture of Michael and David, however, not only are they sitting very close together, but that "pull" is readily visible, and you can see them leaning/melting into each other without any effort. So that by itself on a foundational, fundamental level puts these pictures into two very different places.
The second aspect of the contrast--again, in my opinion--is the impersonal nature of Anna's post vs. Georgia's. Anna is posting a Getty Images picture with a watermark with another generic "Darling" caption (the same as she did in another post when the first episode of The Way aired a few weeks ago). At this point it feels, as @invisibleicewands previously described, akin to a "Best regards" at the end of an e-mail. And again, it's not only a photo shoot pic instead of a personal one--an especially strange choice given that Michael has repeatedly talked about how much he hates photo shoots--but a shot where Michael looks stiff and so uncharacteristically subdued.
In the picture Georgia posted, we see that twinkle in his eye, how relaxed he looks, full of that life and joy that we've come to so strongly associate with Michael, and it makes it even more stark how absent that is from the second picture. And further adding to all of this is what you mentioned, about AL centering herself/how she and Michael look in this post, as opposed to the opening of the play.
If we had any doubts about this, Anna seems to have taken the point home this with the story she posted immediately following this one:
For those who may not know, this is a photo from the show Schitt's Creek, of the actors who play the main family (special shout-out to Catherine O'Hara and Eugene Levy, my loves). I have not actually seen the show, so I can't attest to anything specific about the characters' personalities, but it appears this is who AL thinks she and Michael look like. I would say, though, that what is apparent to me is that Anna's priority in posting that first Insta story was the aesthetic/the picture, rather than celebrating Michael or the opening night of the play. Putting these two things together, Michael almost seems like the smallest part of the post, which is an odd thing to do when tonight is the opening night of his play.
And this again wildly contrasts with Georgia's post, where the picture is merely a vehicle for something much deeper, and much more meaningful. Just the positioning of the word "Michael" at the center of the picture is a visual cue that lets us know what this post is about, and this is further augmented by the caption for all of the reasons I enumerated here. I also can't help thinking that there was a reason that a picture of Michael and David was used--not a picture of Michael by himself, and not a picture of Michael and Georgia--and given that this Insta story was posted after AL's, it makes me wonder if that was a deliberate choice, for multiple reasons...
So yes, those are my thoughts on these two Insta stories/pictures from today. I'm definitely interested to see what posts or pictures we might get following tonight's performance/press night (and fingers crossed that David actually made it to the show this time). Also glad as always to hear from my followers about your take on these posts. Thanks for writing in! x
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Hi there!
This is the rebooted ask blog for my Toxic Consequences AU!
(The old one will still be there, but now you gotta send asks here.)
Da Rules
1. NO NSFW, gore, fetishes, etc.
2. No homophobia, transphobia, ableism, etc. That stuff is not allowed here.
3. I will delete asks, but I do read each and every one.
4. In character hate is fine. Just don't overdo it or be out of character.
5. Pelipper Mail is ON
6. Magic Anon is OFF
7. Specify who you're talking to! Or else you get hit with one of these:
8. If you want to talk to me, the mod, just say so! Just send an ask directed towards the mod (or just call me Ari. Pronouns he/him)
9. The Out of Character (OOC) cue I'll use is //
10. If a sentence or word is crossed out like this, it is not something the character is saying. It's like inner thoughts and stuff.
11. If something is tiny, like this, then it is something that asks can respond to!
12. Over time, more characters will be available for asks, and some might be temporarily or permanently unavailable. If you send a character an ask while they're unavailable, it will be answered when said character comes back.
DA LORE
Dokutaro is helping Kieran get stronger, except it's less of help and more like "I'm going to take over your body"
Carmine and the others are working to get Kieran back and keep the newly discovered hidden treasure safe.
Characters Available for asks
Carmine
Briar
Terapagos
Florian
Juliana
Terapagod
Ogerpon
The Loyal 3
Story Tags:
(These will help people keep track of the different lore.... when there is lore.)
#Miscellaneous Mischief - random silly asks!
#Ari Rambles - the mod talking
#Signboard Search - the field trip and the signboard related topics
#Kieran's logs - Exactly what it sounds like. A place to put his thoughts.
#Festival of Masks - events regarding the Festival, of course!
#Toxic Chain Shenanigans - Anything relating to Dokutaro and Kieran's deal
#Carmine's Logs - Carmine making her own logs!
#Bothersome Blueberry Academy - the shenanigans revolving around Blueberry Academy
#Mochi Mischief - MOCHI MOCHI
#Area Zero Trouble - The expedition to Area Zero with the gang.
#Sentret Support - a little Sentret comes along to help Kieran
#The Untold Story of Dokutaro - backstory magic
#Mind and Chains - Carmine and Dusk going to rescue Kieran
#Confrontation of Masks - Ogerpon and Dokutaro have a fun little interaction
#Shrouded Legends - Uncovering the mystery of Dokutaro and the Loyal 3
That should be it! Have fun!
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Welcome Home A.R.G Crackcanons
Wally definitely feigns innocence because he’s the main character who has to “learn” with the audience
It’s canon that he thinks he’s handsome and enjoys admiring himself in the mirror, so he 100% knows about the simps and is super smug about it
With his soft voice and gentle demeanor, he really fits the “darling” reputation
Despite this, I do genuinely believe he’s a good person and means the best. My personal theory is that Home is manipulating Wally in some way to do their bidding.
(I picture Wally being manipulated by Home is a euphemism for paternal manipulation and depression. But that’s just a theory. A GAME THEORY-)
He strikes me as someone that everyone WANTS to be submissive, but is actually a very dominant
Barnaby and Frank have a SpongeBob-Squidward relationship
Barnaby goes out of his way to annoy Frank
Frank can respect the effort, but would never admit it
Barnaby calls Frank “Frankfurter” much to Frank’s dismay
Barnaby is Sans from UnderTale I don’t make the rules
A very easy-going, morally grey kinda guy. Super chill person who’s always down to have a good time.
He rarely gets embarrassed or flustered. Nothing really catches him off guard
Except anything having to do with romance. If someone flirts with him his brain short-circuits
Which is funny considering he’s definitely one to flirt with someone jokingly
He gives everyone in town unique nicknames
Barnaby has a lovely singing voice. He mostly enjoys singing jazz. But mostly he sticks to stand-up comedy
Howdy is Barnaby’s biggest fan
Howdy has control over the store radio and whenever there are no customers, he turns on hardcore rock. But you’d never know because he wears the same smile no matter the situation
You’d think that with all those legs that Howdy would be a klutz. On the contrary, he’s quite elegant and light-footed
Julie isn’t a klutz either, but she’s super forgetful. Head-in-the-clouds kinda person
Despite this, she always remembers the tiniest details about the most random things (ADHD lookin’ ah)
She’s definitely someone to collect rocks that she thinks are cool or feel nice on her hands
Her love language is touch but she hates being touched without permission
This leads to a few disputes between herself and Frank
Frank is the opposite tho. He acts like he hates being touched but he’s touchstarved
The only people allowed to touch him are Eddie and Julie
Sometimes Barnaby tries to touch Frank in subtle ways just to annoy him. (Such as noogying his head or poking his sides)
Frank LOVES bouncy, squishy stuff. It just scratches his brain just right
On the other hand, he HATES stuff that sticks to him.
For example, I imagine he’d be head over heels at the discovery of oobleck but would steer clear of glitter or anything that clings with static electricity
Because of the mentioned above, Frank has a VERY specific taste in clothing. He just hates the feel of certain fabrics
Knew he was in love with Eddie when the mailman was running to him happily, mail in hand, only to trip and face plant in the mud. Despite this, Eddie didn’t stop smiling
Himbo makes tsundere heart go brrrr
Neither one confessed to each other for AGES so Julie took it upon herself to put them into awkward situations
Cue Poppy “intervening”
Speaking of Poppy, she’s the resident mom-friend. Makes sure everyone’s taking care of themselves physically and emotionally
Despite this she always forgets to take care of herself
Poppy is SUCH a proud LGBT+ mom. Her house is a safe haven for the gays. I don’t make the rules
She’s a tall, elegant, lady, so she swoons at gentle ladies trying to sweep her off her feet
Literally such a sweetheart I love Poppy
Whereas Frank knows all the technical and sensical facts, Poppy is more worldly and wise. She’s been around the coop, so to speak
Im convinced Poppy knows everything about EVERYONE and spreads gossip just for the benefit of her neighbors
(For example she spread rumors that Frank was going to her house to get an engagement ring for Eddie. This wasn’t true, but it lead to both Frank AND Eddie barging into her house for an explanation. She simply placed two cups of tea and a tray of cookies and left them alone in the living room)
Barnaby likes to call her “Cupid” because of this
Poppy always shows up to one of her Neighbor’s events, whether it’s a show for Barnaby or a casting call for Sally
Sally loves the support of peacock mom
Sally writes all her own plays, but makes money by sending in her own transcripts under a pen name
She’s actually very famous under her pen name and is torn between revealing herself to the world and staying mysterious
Sally decides to remain anon so that she can focus on her acting
Spent years in the night sky, watching all the people in town and all their shenanigans. Many years passed before she could work up the courage to come down to introduce herself
Incredible actress, but she has social anxiety and is much calmer outside of a play
Adversely, once she’s got an idea, she’s ALL IN. All her brain cells go into that ONE project or idea, and she ends up dragging everyone along with her. A one track mind, if you will
Sally always casts herself as the lead, but if there are any other main characters or main antagonists she ALWAYS casts Wally to play the part
This low-key offends Barnaby, because he loves a good villain and always wants to play the part of antagonist
Sally always asks Julie to help her make the backdrops
All of the neighbors have fears of some sort, except for Wally
It’s kind of freaky that he never seems to give people the reaction their looking for
But ye Wally has emotions, he’s just INCREDIBLE at masking them
Wally loves eye contact because he believes that eyes are the window to the soul
It’s also an assertiveness thing but no one would ever guess cuz of his cutesy face
Wally def has a staring problem but smooth-talks his way out of any awkward situation that could come from it
Wally is demisexual. Though he loves people easily in the friendly sense, it takes a LONG time for him to fall for someone romantically. But once he does, it’s over for his love interest cuz he’ll become clingy AF
Barnaby is the opposite. He’s very in tune with his emotions and knows immediately when he likes someone. He just chooses to avoid the crap out of them as soon as he realizes. He just gets too embarrassed. I personally headcanon him as asexual
Julie is genderfluid and very similar to Wally. Though she isn’t demi, she loves all kinds of people equally. So it just takes a minute for her to decipher whether or not she loves someone NORMALLY or MORE than a friend.
Poppy is a classy lady who’s looking for a fellow lady to spend her life with. Since she’s got some experience, she’d probably take pride in playing the waiting game. Some subtle touches here, some lingering eye contact there… it’s a slow burn ladies and gents.
Frank is someone who prefers men (specifically Eddie. Good thing the feelings mutual.) likes his men dumb and well meaning.
Eddie prefers men as well. Specifically men who are serious and well read.
Howdy is pansexual, but isn’t really looking for a relationship due to his business.
Sally feels kinda like another asexual to me. But she’d like to be in a relationship with a friend. Like get married and share a life together without all the romancey stuff
Julie and Frank both have the same love language - physical touch. But in different ways as said earlier
Frank also prefers Acts of Service, like Howdy
Poppy enjoys gift giving
Sally and Barnaby enjoy words of affirmation
Wally is a casual Quality Time enjoyer
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Flashback Friday!
Tagged by the amazing @thatgirlnevershutsup. Thank you!
So I'm going back to 2010 with a post-IWTB story: In a Graveyard
Summary: He hated snow…Mulder attends a funeral.
Skinner shook his head. "You're unbelievable. Isolation has actually made you more egotistical. You must've been a joy to live with these last six years."
One thing Mulder knew was that regardless of how many times Skinner threw everything aside to help him, there was only one reason he did it: for Scully. And this was Mulder's cue.
"Thanks for the chat and for the cuddle the other night, Walter. Drop by any time now that I'm not a wanted man." Mulder started to back away.
Skinner rolled his eyes and walked past him, back down to the path. "Get over yourself, Mulder. There's something here you need to see."
This was posted on LJ where it didn't get a lot of attention. It was after the heyday of e-mail lists and Ephemeral when we would get so much feedback for XF fics. So I felt like it flew under the radar. I guess I could move it over to AO3, but I'm lazy so it remains on my old fic site and on my old fic LJ.
Tagging @doctorhelena, @audreyroget, @lilydalexf, @leucocrystal, @lone-gunwoman-of-the-week, @rozf , @bowiecadmium and anyone else who wants to post some old fic!
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AU of mysterious lotus casebook where lxy is not poisoned by bicha 👀
!!!!!!!
thanks for this!!!!
one thing about an AU where there is not bicha poisoning is that the outcome of the donghai battle could have been completely different and the changes could have started as early as 10 years ago :O
i wonder if w/o the Bicha acting up, Li Xiangyi would have been so desperate to have Di Feisheng cough up Shan Gudao’s location right there and then? Would he have tried to stop the battle when he realised that something odd was happening at the same time as he was fighting, with the simultaneous ‘bombing’ of the Sigu Sect members and Jingyuan Alliance members? Would he press on and win? Would Di Feisheng LET him stop the battle?
The reason LXY fights DFS is also due to a ruse that frames the Jingyuan Alliance as SGD’s murderer. The reason DFS doesn't clear up that misunderstanding is because he doesn't care about being the Bad Guy, and this is making LXY fight him at full power. He only has to shut up for LXY to come at him! Great!
But if DFS might be okay with losing Jingyuan Alliance members to finish his fight with LXY, I doubt LXY would be fine with Sigu Sect being collateral for this fight. It's not huge, but I think there is a chance that, w/o the poison acting up when it did, LXY might be able to stop the fight and force DFS into a temporary truce. Alternatively, they could also fight to exhaustion without death, and at the very end, when they both wake up on the beach, LXY gains some sanity and thinks "wait a minute. something wasn't right with this fight. there is something I missed".
Either way, for the sake of this AU, let's presume such a truce happened. So here come the five facts of the AU!
1. LI Xiangyi doesn't die. Even when he still loathes himself for the losses the Sigu Sect incurred because of him, he doesn't die. And Di Feisheng is there the entire time to see that he sticks to it.
2. For DFS too, there is a question mark. We know he used the Jingyuan Alliance and power ultimately to achieve more personal goals, and 10 years ago, those goals weren't achieved yet. At that stage, he would not accept the possibility of traitors in his ranks, or members with personal agendas. DFS is also very, very capable of lying and acting to cover up his intentions. I think there is a good chance for DFS and LXY working together semi-covertly in investigations to (i) find what happened with SGD (for LXY) and (ii) clean up the Jingyuan situation (for DFS).
3. There is a huge mess to clean up in terms of violation of the Peace Treaty and a lot of agendas to hide...but with LXY alive, the Sigu Sect still stands. No one, however, understands why LXY suddenly wants to let the Jingyuan Alliance off the hook for now. What about SGD?? There are awkward meetings where DFS is caught in LXY's quarters and everyone is just "??????????" about it. A LOVE AFFAIR? (cue Sigu Sect becoming more and more unstable in terms of internal politics, but also, LXY prefers this if it means he gets to investigate without alerting the enemy)
4. Some years after the Donghai battle, teen Fang Xiaobao starts showing up to Sigu Sect to train and LXY himself receives a ton of hate mail from He Xiaohui and her husband threatening him to tear the sect apart if they accept her son. There is a huge amount of FXB camping in front of the Sigu Sect gates, shenanigans with a younger FXB failing to bribe LXY with candies even though LXY postpones training him simply because he wants to solve the SGD business and other episodes.
5. Fang Xiaobao gets to know Li Xiangyi as Li Xiangyi, but their prolonged contact humanizes him into a Li Lianhua-style of Li Xiangyi. This would be the story exploring how, w/o the bicha poisoning, Li Xiangyi could combine Li Xiangyi and Li Lianhua and whatever comes after Li Lianhua, into himself, and live.
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Hi, Australian Jew here.
Sending this anonymously because I'm not openly Jewish on Tumblr, however I am considering doing so in the short-term.
I'm sorry to bother you but I wanted to ask you a few questions, if you're open to it (feel free to ignore this if so). Just so you know, I'm asking the same questions of the Jewish bloggers I follow who post regularly - both those who blog about the current Israel/Palestine situation, and those who identify as Jewish but post mainly fandom/other content.
Do you or have you receive/d abuse for being Jewish, or for your stance on the war? If so, how often? How do you respond to any hateful messages? Do you post them publicly or answer them privately? How much would you say your mental health is/has been affected by any messages, or by the content you see on your feed? Have you developed any strategies for handling social media during this time?
Thank you for reading. :-)
Shalom, Aussie chaver!
This is a question I've answered privately a couple of times, and I'm kinda surprised I haven't talked about it more publicly before. Thank you for the opportunity!
Before October 7, I mostly received microaggressions for being Jewish-- especially within goyishe queer communities. That sucked, but nothing I couldn't shake off. Since then, as I'm sure you can assume, it's been a completely different beast. This blog alone receives weekly hate mail, and that can increase to multiple daily death threats if a post I make starts to circulate. Some of that abuse is under the guise of anti-Zionism, but a lot of it is pure bare-bones mask-off antisemitism. 95% of the time, I just delete them and move on with my day. It's difficult to read them sometimes, of course. But there has never once been a hateful ask in my inbox that amounted to even a remotely reasonable critique of my character, of my posts, or of my identity. So they get trashed.
My coping skills for mental health on the internet right now boil down to two things. The first is that, for every death threat I get in my inbox, I get more thank-you notes. I hardly have a big following here, but it's clear that the people who follow me appreciate what I do here. Knowing that I bring more hope, strength, and truth to my Jewish community is what gives me the strength to brush off the hate mail.
My one real strategy for handling social media is the Queue. Oh, G-d, I love the Queue. I'm honestly only on tumblr for like an hour twice a week. It keeps me from the despair and the doomscrolling while still letting me post several times daily. I think my Queue is 50 posts long right now so I could stay offline for two weeks and not have to worry. The side effect is that I often reblog posts which are a week or so old, but as long as I remember not to cue breaking news, it's not that big a deal.
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I am aware this post might make people want to kill me with hammers but when people acknowledge that a huge chunk of this website is autistic and then they also make posts about how enraging it is that someone didn’t understand their post that used like, figurative or abstract language or imagery…like. Some autistic people. Have trouble. When encountering unexpected figurative or symbolic language. With understanding that it is figurative or symbolic.
It’s certainly not every post or even most posts complaining about Reading Comprehension On Tumblr that falls into this trap but it’s definitely something I’ve noticed a handful of times where people complain that their post was not understood, and then I go and look at the post and the part that was misinterpreted was something where definitely I would expect that a chunk of the autistic people I know WOULD have problems understanding whatever literary device they used. You know, due to the Autism.
So I guess I just want to say like, generally I would like it if people would be a little more vigilant about that, and not imply that people are The Enemy or Human Scum or Proud Of Their Own Ignorance because they didn’t understand that something you said was a metaphor or didn’t realize you were using hyperbole for humorous effect. And just like…remember that autism is a disability and that it’s not all fun and games and special interests, and sometimes autism Does In Fact, Surprise Surprise, affect how people process information. Any autistic person who’s ever misunderstood or missed a social cue knows this to be true, so just please have compassion with people who are autistic in a slightly different way from you and misunderstand you in a way you aren’t used to being misunderstood. And just like, don’t be a bully. Lmao.
**And again, PLEASE do not read this post too fast and assume that I’m saying that every single post about reading comprehension on this website is inherently ableist. A lot of them are fine. And please do not say “Well I’m autistic and I can understand figurative language just fine” because I didn’t SAY all autistic people struggle with this, it’s just kind of a Known Autism Fact that SOME autistic people struggle with it.**
Okay? That’s all. Please no hate mail for things I didn’t say. Aaaaand post.
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