#currently going thru a phase with him...

[sailorjisunq]

준호

[sturniolo04]

A/N: Just a random collection of moments dating Matt! Remember to leave requests in my inbox! If you don’t like the pre added name in my works you can simply put in your own or don’t read it, it up to you :)-Charli

dividers: @issysh3ll

" dude can you not touch that please"

matt chuckles out. Matt was currently streaming on twitch by himself and you just happen to be in a goofy mood probably because it was midnight in LA. You were simply just messing around with his stuffed pug that usually sits on his bed comfortably Mr. wrinkleton but tonight he was bothering you just the fact he was sitting peaceful on the bed.

"matt no i took it off the bed"

you giggling trying to reach over him to grab Mr. wrinkleton off of his desk seeing he took it from you and set it there.

"no you were abusing him chat can you tell her to leave him alone"

matt chuckles out grabbing your reaching hands to keep you from grabbing the stuffed animal from him.

"i wasnt abusing him"

you gasp out as matt simply drops his jaw looking at the chat getting distracted for a split second giving you time to quickly snatch the stuffed animal from its spot on his desk.

"HEY NO NO"

matt gasps out grabbing your wrist to stop you from leaving the room with his stuffed animal.

You had recently just gotten your drivers license finally and Matt was so excited for you simply because now you two could switch off in driving each other around when you two needed to go out and about. You two were currently random driving to in n out since you two were hungry this marking your second day of having your license.

Matt unbeknownst to you started to opening his phone to go to record a tiktok to the song There Goes My Baby by Usher simply trying to be funny about the situation.

"what do want to-"

you trail off noticing him recording. he panned the camera over to you in the drivers seat. you quickly place hand over your face completely embarrass that this was happening in real time in the drive thru of all places.

Once he finished recording and put his phone away he immediately started chuckling as he simply stared at you to see your reaction after the fact.

"youre a dork"

you mumble out giggling at your boyfriend rolling your eyes, driving forward In the drive thru line.

"wait i want to be in it too"

you exclaim running into the frame of the in progress tiktok that Nick, chris, and matt had started filming. You stood there smiling not really listening to the words of the song really just simply admiring yourself in the camera if you were being truly honest.

Matt had accidentally when he went to get closer to the filming phone stepped on your fuzzy sock covered feet.

"ow matt you stepped on my toe"

you exclaims giggling simply because you were shocked he didn't see you foot there but also you weren't to phased by the pain because he and you both didn't have shoes on in the first place.

"im so sorry"

he gasps out immediately feeling bad and coming over to you and giving you a hug and kiss on top of your head rocking you two from side to side.

"MATT YOU WERENT LISTENING TO ME"

you exclaims kind of offended to your boyfriend as you two were standing outside of the frozen yogurt place you two decided to come to. He was ignoring you over something stupid him simply playing a little prank on you that wasnt a huge deal.

"its fine relax"

matt chuckles taking his spoonful of frozen yogurt and throwing it at you.

"BITCHH"

you huff out.

"Im gonna fuck you up"

you exclaims throwing your empty yogurst cup at him Matt chuckling.

"lets go come one then"

matt chuckles as you roll your eyes because matt knew better not to urge you on when you were in that mood. You quickly run up to him hitting him on his chest.

"NO NO NO NO NO"

you giggle and exclaim out as matt clearly over your antics picked you up by the waist lunging you over his shoulder.

"MATTHEW PUT ME DOWN NOW"

you scream.

"nope not until you apologize for littering"

matt states begining to pretend to drop you and loose his grip on your body.

"MATT OK OK OK IM SORRY FOR LITTERING"

you scream scared he was going to drop you and matt just simple laughs as you.

Taglist🗂️

@mintsturniolo @spicymuffins03 @dirtylittleheart333

@stayingstromboli @wh0resstuff @ksturnz @chaoswithus @emely9274 @ivysturnss @sturniolo-szn2 @lezleeferguson-120 @courta13 @chrepsi @lyingonchris

@tezzzzzzzz @babytomatoes21 @sturniolosymphony @zenithsturniolo @bernardsbendystraws @sturnioloslut101

[faepotions]

think the worst part of ptsd was the hypervigilance. like. the fear. the agoraphobia. the social anxiety it gave me. just this. fear. to be anywhere I couldnt control the space around me. to be around ppl who felt unpredictable and whom I assumed to be against me or atleast be cruel and cold - all of em. it wasnt the memories. it wasnt dealing with the actual emotional fallout of my trauma. I had no issue sitting there for hours proccessing how my father had sexually abused me, or how he had attempted to groom me, or how my mother had neglected me due to her depression, and how she had ignored any calls for help I had made towards her, how she had simply pretended she could neither see or hear me, eyes phasing right thru me when I was bawling my eyes out, begging her to help me cause dads doing things to me I dont want. that he doesnt stop when I tell him "no". or the way she leaned on me to much for emotional support, whilst extending none to me herself. in fact i was more comfortable sitting in those trauma memories, processing them endlessly, and from every angle, and understanding how what specific traumatic instance in my childhood had formed me to be the person i currently am. i found a lot of terms. parentification. emotional incest. physical incest. role reversal. neglect. csa. i loved rationalising my issues, explaining to myself why i dont trust others, or why i want certain things i want. what i couldnt handle was the fear. the fear was everywhere. i had insomnia, so i was afraid of sleeping cuz sleeping meant giving up control and i didnt like that. i was afraid to leave the house bcz i felt vulnerable and like people could just attack me and i wouldnt be able to handle it or defend myself. new social situations were terrifying too cuz i ultimately didnt trust ppl and always assumed the worst of them.

there was no way to think myself out of fear though. it didnt matter how rational i was being or how much i was processing my baggage. my world remained small. isolated.

for me trauma healing was learning to see myself and others in a more positive way, having self-compassion towards my fear, going small steps, risking new experiences without pressuring myself into them. there was no shortcut. there was just exposure. and contininiung to instill positive habits and ways of thinking into me. sticking to positive self-talk. building into my behavioural patterns what i defined as resilence. teaching myself a better life philosophy than the one informed by trauma i had before. then testing it out in the real world.

one step at a time.

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

happy pride month (mod goldmary + everyone)!!!

i am here 2 finally present Awakening “would they do drag?”: second gen edition 🌈✨️

Owain: He's dabbling in crossplay but hasn't discovered full drag yet. I think he goes through a v brief phase of being defensive abt it (like calling it ‘guyliner’ n shit) before he realizes no one cares and he can do what he wants. once he's worked it out tho? ohhh my god. Everything is happening. in fact I'm not entirely unconvinced Odin Dark isn't just one of his drag personas.

m!Morgan: dresses gnc but I don't think he'd seriously do drag. a skirt is being worn but like… in an emo/scene kid way. u feel me?

Brady: definitely wants to serve deep down but is far too self conscious. he's had the opportunity before and turned it down bc he feels no amount of makeup will make him ‘pretty’ & therefore it's not worth trying. makes me sad bc i dont agree with him at all… like genuinely I think he'd fucking slay and he DESERVES to feel beautiful for once but agh. brady. sometimes you can accept yourself a bit too hard and end up chained to that version of yourself. I think he's done this. hes sold on the idea that hes uggo when thats not at all true….... pls brady u can be pretty too let me help u plssssssss 🥹

Yarne: no, but not because he’s opposed to the gender fuckery aspect. It’s more that the performance part would make his heartrate skyrocket and he’d pass out probably. also I can't imagine makeup playing nice with fur. maybe if there were taguel specific gender roles he’d play with those but uhh... yeah. on the bright side i do think he'd look lovely with some flowers braided thru his ears or similar.

Gerome: ok. so. he's definitely gay. he's definitely at the club. but i do not think he is a queen. gerome instead i believe is a paying customer. he tips very well, and though he sits at the back and doesn't even clap or anything hes still spending bucks and doesn't cause a fuss so hes become a beloved regular. I DO think there's a tiny part of him deep down that wants to queen it up, but that would take like an entire ocean's 11 heist to pull off (i'm talking Make Chrom Transition levels of difficulty here). there's also a serenes page claiming awakening's files suggest gerome might have been a woman at some point in dev so uhh take that as you will i guess 🤷‍♀️

Inigo: remember when his feh dancer alt came out in like 2017 and everyone was so fucking happy for him? because awakening makes it SO clear he secretly wants to be a dancer more than anything else (which for some reason is said to be a fem role even tho we've had male dancers before)?? and bc we Know that his current role as a 'gentleman' swordsman not only is a mask used 2 cope, but also makes him absolutely miserable deep down???

yeah.

call it ‘just a hc’ call me a conspiracy theorist but I fully believe inigo is 100% a dev intended tranfem allegory and that reading her as a closeted/repressed woman makes so much sense that I am genuinely shocked at how uncommon this reading seems 2 be. like her paralogue is titled 'a man for flowers' ffs. they may as well be calling her a friend of fuckin dorothy's at this point yet i stilllll come across ppl talking abt 'canonically queer fe characters' and they do not includer her in the list 💀

.....anyway its drag until she works it out. In the meantime I think Inigo is the most insufferable egg known to man and every time she says something akin to 'i love girls i wish i was a girl :(' severa gets one step closer to popping a blood vessel.

Laurent: OK YAY the final guy. I kept going back and forth on him bc i truly believe he could just be a boring gay, but he could Also have a secret slay side.... i wasnt sure. sooo eventually I just polled it. here are the results:

Surprisingly an overwhelming yes happened pretty much straight away! and now in hindsight I realize that researching and gathering data is probably how Laurent would have wanted things lmao

so i present now my 'informed' opinion that Laurent is very seriously into drag. Owain and her become drag sisters, tho they dont really hang out outside of the club. I do think drag is lowkey her second job (accountant by day cunt-out-ant at night etc) and she's probably going to earn enough that she ends up running her own club one day. with enough hot springs therapy sessions I think she could convince inigo to come work for her also. AND, as one person said on my poll (very important): "the hat stays on" 👍

so there you have it thats awakening done!!

the only other games I know well enough for drag assignment are three houses and path of radiance (tho planning on replaying sacred stones and maybe the other 2 gbas at some point) so idk i'll see if I can come up with anything for those.

otherwise this has been v fun! ty for enjoying my opinions :]

👀

[douglasanondr]

Dark Schezo and Schezo's inner thoughts (or how I would add Doppel. Schezo back to main canon)

The following Paragraphs was originally a comic, but it later dawned on me that a comic wouldn't give my thought process justice, also this Paragraph is based on the following ideas:

The Live Manzai during Dark Schezo's reintroduction. (I need to find the livestream, I keep saying it but I never have the vid at the ready)

Puzzle Pop, Specifically the Dream World

The Dream Box

The Doctor Who episode "Amy's Choice" (here's a clip for my reasoning)

Schezo (Mores Specifically from 20th Dongureigaeru)

So with Puzzle Pop as finished as an interesting story with an ending in need for at least 1 more chapter to not feel incomplete can get. I thought to myself about the Dream World, more specifically what would happen if someone in the Dream World were to succumb to their Nightmares in there. Because the Dream World changes to fit what the person dreams about so what would happen if they just had to go thru they're own NIghtmares. So I started thinking, and then I thought about the Dream Box, and how it's currently in Schezo's possesion, and that the quote from 20th says that Schezo constantly suffers from Nightmares. Then I had an Idea.

So the Story Starts as normal, You start as Arle/Amitie/Ringo and are in Primp but just like In Puzzle Pop something feels off. Then they run into Meena but this time they don't actually know why everyone is back in the Dream World. All 4 of them are just all around confused so Meena tries to wake them all up, but when they do, they just end up in a cave, more specifically Schezo's Cave except every time they try to leave they just end up back inside the cave, so imagine a Cave but it just loops forever and Schezo's stuff is there. Then They reappear back at Dream Primp.

Then the story goes on as normal, Arle and Co. go investigating on what's going on, eventually they run into everyone along the way and learn that just like in Puzzle Pop, they can't leave. Except now Meena has no clue why and it's not Sig's fault because he's right there and perfectly fine. More notably is that every so often they switch between Dream Primp and the Endless Cave whenever they meet someone and it always changes, The cave will sometimes have wooden floorboards and windows before finally looking like a combination of the inside of a Cave and a Log Cabin, while in Primp, Some of the Houses start to spread apart, stone walls appear everywhere, foliage beings to creep all over, and Mirrors occasionally appear on the walls. While this is happening the cast from the Madou end comment how familiar the Dream is becoming, Schezo especially comments on feeling uneasy in both areas.

Then after everyone gather's around while inside the Endless Cave and tries to figure out what's going on, that is when Dark Schezo just suddenly appears. When Dark Schezo appears he begins to approach Schezo more notably phasing thru others to get to him. Dark Schezo notably never acknowledges anyone while he talks to Schezo only talking about the others by saying that "this is the first time, I've had a captive audience" and "I can work with this". While Dark Schezo talks to Schezo, he starts mocking him, not in the traditional "calling him a pervert", "Joking about his aloofness" etc. but mocks him with stuff only Schezo would know, stuff that really cuts deep to him.

Example:

Schezo: *Hmph* When did you get all high in mighty qith informarion like that?

D!Schezo: Me? Like you're any better. The sullen eyes, the way you act, the fact you hide all of your acars. I'm more suprised no one's notices how much you look like you want to crawl back into the grave, We know you'll never be able to enter.

After some more mocking, Dark Schezo offers Schezo a challenge, suddenly everyone is teleported back to Dream Primp and Dark Schezo explains that while here, they would all end up at their most vulnerable states and it is up to Schezo to protect them, if he succeeds everyone wakes up, if he fails they'll have to go thru it all over again. Then he disappears.

Soon Nightmares start happening to the other characters. It starts of small like, more Ghosts start appearing from no where and start scaring Ringo, Dogs begin chasing Raffina and Rei, images of Satan and Lemres getting married (Sadly not to each other), etc. But it soon starts to escalate to the extreme, Sig begins to show signs of becoming the Black Sig, Lemres finds himaelf trapped in an arena forced to fight Shadow Mages, Everyone disappears in Ecolo's Eyes to the point where they no longer exist to him, Meena gets weaker and weaker aeeing evrtone go thru their nightmares etc.

All the While Schezo is there, trying to snap people out of there nightmares per the challenge, All the while Dark Schezo is there mocking him every step of the way. It ahould be noted that Dark Schezo never attacks anyone, not even a Puyo battle, he only ever shows up to create a nightmare scenario and mock Schezo more and more woth more increasingly personal info. Like:

*After Saving Ringo*

Dark Schezo: Some of those Ghosts looked familiar didn't they, though I don't expect you to remember every soul that ran into you.

*After saving Sig*

Dark Schezo: Why so glum, hit to close to home? :)

*After saving Raffina/Rulue*

Dark Schezo: Sounds right? I mean it's not like you can hurt them like you can hurt the others.

While all of this is happening there's a sense that Schezo knows what Dark Schezo is but doesn't want to say, or more specifically dosen't want to aknowledge it.

Soon Schezo succeeds and everyone ia freed from there nightmares, Dark Schezo suprisingly is pleased with this outcome. Teleporting eveetone back to the Endless Cave, Dark Schezo begins to one final Nightmare. Soon Hands erupt from the ground forcing Schezo to them, Visions and Faces fill Schezo's mind as a Dark Aura begins to force itself into Schezo, tearing thru him all the way. As this happens everyone wastes no time trying to help him and when they do; Suddenly, they wake up.

Back in the Real World, Everyone is underatandably confused and begins to gather around to find out what happened. Eventually, Schezo speaks up, stating he might have an answer to what happened before bringing out the cause of everything; The Dream Box. Turns out last night, Schezo was experimenting with the Dream Box, before dozing off and activating its effects trapping the whole town in his Dream.

The Dark Schezo they saw was just a part of Schezo's mind, Schezo theorizing that it was made of all the dark parts of Schezo's psyche, lowkey boasting as to why it was so powerful due to coming from the mind of The Dark Mage. When he says that Lemres asks that if Dark Schezo is a part of Schezo's Mind then everything he said would be stuff that Schezo himself believes in. Schezo doesn't answer, only looks away for a bit before walking away, claiming to put the Dream Box away so this doesn't happen again.

In the reflection of the Drema Box's Gem, Dark Schezo smiles.

The End. So what do y'all think?

[hanasnx]

teehee 🤭 I have ur post notifs on so I always see whe. u go thru ur character phases. Garrus is one of my favs♡

ugh thank god. i love that anon. rn things are so busy for me that i have like 10 mins of collective time to be into a character daily and then i move on asap i feel like i can’t stay nailed down for longer than a few days :( but garrus!!! i’ve been thinking about him since december, need to play mass effect but my copy is currently loaned out smh

[chelemlem]

F1 Tag Game! thank you to @peppysinc for the tag!! this was fun 🌻

who is your favorite driver?: mr. oscarjack himself

do you have other favorite drivers?: i care deeply about lewis, yuki, lando, alex, and sharl before a haircut <3 from the retired drivers it's nico & jense!

i go thru phases with everyone else

who is your least favorite driver?: i know it's not singularly junior's fault the mcl h2h looks the way it does but he Did play a non-insignificant role. so

do you pull for drivers or do you like teams as well?: sniffles i SWEAR i was never a teamfucker pre-2024 but there's something about the mclaren machine that's been massively successful at inspiring sick&nasty hopium... it's also the only team on the current grid where i like + rate both drivers as well as the tp. it's coming home 🧡🧡💯⁉️

If you like teams, what teams do you pull for?: mcl 🧡 (if u see me forzaing the occasional ferrari next year mind ur own business)

how long have you been into f1?: since january 2022! a couple of friends were getting heated abt ad21 at a ny party and i was like i am feel uncomfortable when we are arguing without me ?

what got you into f1?: dts but if we're getting specific it was prolly the 3.5 min brocedes flashback in s3ep3.....

do you enjoy fanfic/RPF?: i dabble 👍

are your friends and family into f1 as well?: i have 2 longtime online friends and a beloved irl who enjoy it too! and a few of my coworkers are casuals who grew up watching f1 lmao it's certainly Interesting to pretend to be normal on a monday morning when some1 is like hey d'you see norris finally won? like Yes I Did See That. Good For Him

if you could take over as team principal for any team, who would it be and why?: regardless of the team i'd just immediately write myself a €50m cheque and dip...... that said i have big plans for u vegan carbohydrate

are you open to talking to other fans/making friends?: yes!!! so grateful to everyone i've gotten to speak to thru fandom already and always open to more <33

[fandomchaosposts]

rating my spotify playlists (in alphabetical order) <3

404 error ethan not found

8/10 - way too sad and yearn-y for this name but i was being gay about stuff and i respect that. points deducted because there was no reason to be sad about this and now ive lost a good name

2. ah yes, the feels

ill be honest fam i dont even remember making this. 6/10 - i dont like these songs anymore but i was going somewhere with the name

3. All the songs you wanna hear right now

3/10 - there is no universe in which i would want to listen to this combo of songs. points added because i like maybe 4 out of the 40 songs in there

4. Apple music who?

??/10 - i dont even know if ive ever listened to this. zero points added for the name, a bit of sympathy bc it was created for f1 reasons

5. bear hug

decent 5/10 - i see where i was coming from and i would like a hug right now

6. brain go brrr

7/10 - brain do be going brrr ive missed these songs

7. do you love me, hate me, I don't understand

9/10 - i wouldn't click on this myself but i would vibe to the songs in a heartbeat and the name fits the vibe

8. fire *cackles*

6/10 - decent songs coupled with some that i simply have zero vibes with

9. get a panda, name him Horse

9/10 - honestly the only reason this doesnt get a 10 is because i havent touched it in years

10. hi *waves* im not the sea

984693/10 - WE FIGURED OUT WHERE I HEARD NO LOVE IN LA FOR THE FIRST TIME other than that not rly my vibe anymore ngl

11. if you dont like my presense why would you invite me

10/10 simply *chefs kiss* i love it, if you dont like my presense why the fuck would you invite me??

12. if you hate the royal family clap your hands

4/10 - honestly points given only for the name

13. listen to this 🔪

currently empty but i dont think i could rate it anyways, i just need to remember to listen to song recs

14. i listened to this now what

follow up of the previous playlist, honestly i dont think i can rate it

15. imyb <3

10/10 playlist for when youre in the feels, name fits so no points deducted for that

16. *insert good playlist name here*

-137/10 - unoriginal name and i swear to god ive seen the same combo of songs in a previous playlist

17. *insert good name here*

3/10 - honestly only stays bc i think i made it for a friend like 4 years ago

18. i wonder if you think of me ✨

10/10 - i do. wonder if you think of me. sometimes. and the songs are seriously fire <3

19. lets see, what do we have here

5/10 - love the artist hate the name, havent touched it in years

20. More Songs I will listen to once and then inevitably go back to Minecraft

3/10 - points for the accurate name but i didnt even remember this existed until now

21. new songs playlist *ahem* lies *ahem*

??/10 - not even gonna rate this one its the millionth time im seeing these fucking songs

22. Oh? Brauchst du einen Name? Ich kann dir nicht helfen

4/10 - points for the name but i fucking. havent listened to these songs in 4 years

23. physics? who is she i dont know her

110/10 - honestly? the reason i made this to begin with who is physics i dont know this woman

24. pretend this has a name

0/10 - unoriginal i kinda like the songs but i havent touched it in so long anyways

25. sea sickness

5/10 - i was going thru my tiktok phase okay

26. songs you listen to instead of going to sleep

5/10 - i guess?? fam i dont remember listening to this i know i used to like the songs but its been like. 5 years.

27. your friendly local neighberhood unhinged screamer

7/10 - lando norris cover in a palaye royale playlist you cant go wrong with this one

28. your voice. gimme.

6.5/10 - listen i was figuring out my gender and corpse has. a Voice.

[hiosphere]

two zero two five

happy new year!! a bit late since it's already the 4th but it is another new, shiny year so it still counts

this year I am one year away from having my prefrontal cortex finally formed; twenty-fourrrr yessirrrr

what to feel, what to feel, what to feel

as per norm, I have already filled out my 2025 goals and aspirations like all the masses. healthier, wiser, less stupid purchases, so on and so forth. I am looking forward to experience new things, challenging myself to a new edge i.e. joining that damn marathon that I am always afraid of lmao, speaking up more at work, being mindful of where I am and what I should say and how I should act at the moment. not having my cluttered brain wondering too much of the things that I am not able to control.

this year I feel like I should less worry about moving to the next phase of life and just enjoy the things that I have already have at the moment, making the most out of it and following the current as one should be. I do need to start upgrading my skills more in terms of career wise though, feeling like having the 'I can't do that' mindset will forever set me back from achieving what I deserve. let's go!! we can do this!!

now to the TMI about my life, I just got better from a fever. can you believe the plot twist my immune system decided to have lmao. not getting fever all year but decided to by the very last days of 2024. quite ironic but yeah.

one of my closest cousins got married the other day and it was so, so, so bittersweet to finally see her being in the arms of the love of her life. especially since I watched her cried during her lowest moments, trying to keep the relationship going. life absolutely does not revolve around relationships; I am aware of that, and I am not romanticizing the act of suffering to get your happy ending. I think everyone deserves a happy ending and sometimes that happy ending does require a bit of a sacrifice. that's what makes it worth it in the end. I hope everything goes well for her, I always hope so.

more, I just had a big fight with my boyfriend last night. we made up, we always do, but coming out of that fight, I feel like I should really stop trying to add up things to make the situation worse lmao. one thing that I really appreciate is how emotionally intelligent he is in explaining his side that I can take a step back and realize my own mistake and make up for it. I don't know why but having that trait of him feels very easy to fix our wrongdoings whenever we experience misunderstandings. it doesn't feel like I have to solve a puzzle that I don't have the answer to.

yesterday, I also had such bad cramps that I was crying the entire way home from work (actually one the reasons why my emotional sensitivities were like way up to a 100) but my best friend saw the picture of me crying because of cramps and accompanied me thru facetime the entire way back :( my work bestie also helped me a lot in relieving my cramps by helping me fill up my bottle with hot water :( the way that I am just so, so, so grateful God gave me these wonderful, selfless people when I needed someone the most.

thank you, truly for all these abundant blessings in life. alhamdulillah for everything x

[sturn777]

HEYYYYY!! CAN U PLS WRITE SMTH AB DEALER READER SEEINF FB CHRIS POST W ANOTHER GIRL?? AND SHE DOESNT RLLY HAVE A RIGHT TO BE MAD CAUSE THEYVE JS BEEN HOOKING UP FOR A WHILE, BUT SHE STILL IS. AND HES ALL CHILL AB IT AND ITS PISSING HER OF.

dealer!reader getting jealous . | ( female!reader ) wc ?? ( masterlist ) + ( request )

lana's note : hi anon 🤍 !! hope i did ur ask justice <3 currently going thru all reqs and trying to cook smth up !

꒰ა " you claim you know me better than i know myself, you're right . " ໒꒱

you’re lying on chris’ bed, scrolling mindlessly through instagram as the faint scent of weed drifts through the cracked window. he’s next to you, leaning back against the headboard, blunt between his fingers, looking like every bad decision you’ve ever made wrapped up in a hoodie and sweatpants.

you weren’t planning to scroll, but the glow of your phone and boredom got the best of you. that’s when you see it—a post from him, a mirror selfie with some girl hanging off his shoulder, with her silky hair and her too-perfect nails tracing along his hoodie like she owns him. the caption? some dumb, cocky line about the “night being young.”

you don’t even realize your jaw is tightening until chris shifts beside you, his voice cutting through the haze. “yo, what’s up with you?” you glance at him, then back at your phone, a sharp scoff escaping your lips. “nothing. just funny how some people don’t know how to act.”

he raises an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitching in amusement. “oh, we throwing shade now? that about me, ma?”

“who else would it be about?” you snap back, shoving your phone onto the bed and crossing your arms. your bratty tone doesn’t even phase him—it never does. chris takes a long drag from the blunt, exhaling a slow stream of smoke, his eyes narrowing just slightly. “so, what, you mad ‘cause I posted a pic? girl’s just a friend. ain’t that deep.”

you roll your eyes dramatically, turning away from him like you’re above this conversation. “please. i don’t care. do what you want.” he laughs, low and rough, leaning over to pluck your phone off the bed and wave it in your face. “nah, you definitely care. look at you, all pouty and shit. cute.”

“you’re insufferable,” you mutter, grabbing for your phone, but he pulls it out of reach, smirking like he’s enjoying every second of this. “yeah, but you like it,” he shoots back, his free hand trailing lazily over your thigh. “c’mon, ma. don’t get all worked up. i’m right here, ain’t i?”

you glare at him, but his hand keeps moving, brushing against the hem of your shorts, his fingers warm and deliberate. god, he’s so cocky, so annoyingly laid back, but he knows exactly what he’s doing. “still mad?” he murmurs, his voice dropping lower, his lips brushing against your jaw as his hand slides higher.

you hate how easily he gets under your skin, how he can flip the script with just a touch. “you’re so full of yourself,” you whisper, but your breath hitches as his mouth finds your neck, leaving a trail of heat behind.

“maybe,” he murmurs against your skin, his voice smug as his hands tug you closer, “but you’re still here, ain’t you?”

and just like that, he’s got you again, tangled up in him, forgetting all about the stupid post and the stupid girl because right now, it’s just him and you, and that’s all that matters.

taglist : ( @emely9274 ; @bluestriips ; @loveparqdise ; @flouqissss ; @st4rcs ; @starwebber9 )

[baekhvuns]

ON NAUR BESTIE UR SICK??? TC OF YOURSELFFFF

IKR 2 YRS‽‽ Like..we didn't even realise how the time flew. OMG, I'd love to see thru your drafts for sure, ngl ever since u've been gone i haven't been on Tumblr as much, like idk if it's my kpop obsession tht died down or the fact i don't like reading ffs anymore or the fact tht I don't like reading ffs that are not urs 😔😔😔 see ilysm 🤭DW ILL BE HERE TO SEE THE FF WHEN IT DROPS I AINT LEAVING ANYTIME SOON 🗣️

Damnnn that's the first time I've heard of misphonia BUT HE DROPPED THE SECOND PART 🗣️🗣️

Trauma i tell u. Bro broke me. Absolutely to shreds.

Hold up let me find the video (i wld love love loveee to tell u abt the second part but oh. If ur planning to hear it. U gotta suffer truly. That's the beauty of it 🥰)

https://youtu.be/C5Aab2I5lqo?si=BhowFtzVeZiZEhhE

There u go, if tht doesn't work, i hv a feeling it won't, the channel is named Nora Asmr, and u cn find the "tracing tattoos" video.

ANYWAYSSSSS

OMG jannat 😧😧 nah bro I had forgotten all about that, i just unlocked a memory

AAAAA THAT SOUNDS MAJESTIC I'm honestly deprived. DEPRIVED I TELL YOU. I need more old Bollywood movies 😭😭 LIKE PLSSSSSS

Did I hear tauba tauba?

(i hv secretly been trying to learn the step, I look like a struggling horse)

VICKY SLAYYEDDDD i get it Katrina, i get it now 😔🤚 OH AND HERE LET ME DROP THIS EDIT I FOUND FOR THE PAKISTANI DRAMA

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C91sGU3ILWH/?igsh=MWxwOWRudHkwcnFpOA==

It's called kabhi hum kabhi tum 😮‍💨😮‍💨 the concepts are so interesting..

ALSO I GOT A NEW SUITTT

Your girl in her desi era 💅💅✨✨

Okok i shall leave now AND TC!! BUH BYEEEE

hello!!!!

yes i was sick! but i’m way better now but unfort the bug got to many others so everyone around me is sick 😭😭😭

tWO years 😭😭😭 no but like me too my kpop phase had been dying since a while and now im just not into it very much (the songs r just not it anymore) neither do i read fics or even come here (as u can tell bc this ask response is so late 😭😭) I LOVE U FOR THAT NDJDDJCK i get sparks for fics to write but the writing part just turns me off so ive just been watching kdramas rather than listening to kpop 😭 currently watching love next door and i did not know jung hae-in was like that, i was gawking at him every time he comes on screen

IT DID NOT WORK, the video is unbelievable to my region apparently for no reason BUT THANK GOD I WOULD NOT HAVE TO SUFFER ☺️☺️

RIGHT?? jannat’s songs and to be able to play them at home was like playing w the devil, bc u never know when emran would emran hashmi. ITS SUCH A MAJESTIC SONG IKK THE AMT OF FICS IVE THOUGHT BASED ON THAT SONG 😩 im actually obsessed w it, slowed and reverb, fast & regular paced im obsessed

TAUBA TAUBAAA I CANT avoid it anywhere, it played at the wedding i was at and everyone and their mom was trying to do the step but it just looked like a horse galloping 😭😭😭 I GET HER I RLY DO what a duo, a dancing queen and now her partner 😩

THAT VIDEO LINK DOES NOT WORK EITHER WHAT THE HELL 😭😭😭

oo let me see the suIT (priv ask ofc ur wanting to share!) what colour is it??? i love getting suits but i hate the process of choosing them

[thefourpointedstar]

i need to give him more trauma i need 3 of him inside his brain i need t3 eshuary starview i need cmyk- no i need t3 and t4, t1+t2 eshuary need to fail at something so much that they can complete cmyk spectrum god i fucking love colours! im so glad i learnded how to see colours!11!!!!! ouuughhh but howwww how would i go about doing this-- i can sorta think of t3 but t4 is outta the question... and then it raises the question what the fuck would these 2 eshuary's do- much less what would t1 eshuary do? the current timeline eshuary is the one always in control so.. fuck eshuary dynamics- maybe something with that strange fuckin-- the strange 4 crystal cmyk thing? that i stole from spectrum? uh ig t1 would be key... t2 would be matter- no, cyan* t3 would be... time... oh! Magenta! right! and finally Yellow! T4 yellow! maybe it could be like they control facets of like the crystal things--- and maybe eshuary's electrical control? make him phase thru attacks (or atleast disintegrate the matter the attacks are made out of before they can damage eshuary?) or something? I- I dont know! Blerhg! maybe i should actually focus on eshuary himself than what he can do, eh ill do it later...

[littlewalken]

jan 26

In a way I'm not looking forward to a total tear down and rewrite of the Hollywood story but in another as I reread it there are too many things bout it I don't care much for. On a note to self I'm at the first press con for the frontier show.

First off it the current draft looks to be from 2020 and I am nowhere near being that person any more. I know I went thru and skimmed off some of a lot of the scum (no other way to explain) and undescribed many people (a good thing) but I also changed a few names that aren't working. Reno needs his back but the forms of Thomas are working for the other end.

I need to be nicer to Zack and make him a bit more sympathetic and complex.

Simona needs to be a bit less tropey, I think I'm seeing some uncomfortable in my then current situation projection at her. She's not the villain, there is no villain, she just represents a take advantage of what you can when you can mentality.

In general I need to ingest some character fodder media from the inspirations of the OCs.

Got to make Gregory's personality gear shifts more direct and have more of his personal thoughts on the effects of them.

Zack and Tam need to be more awkwardly frosty and his relationship with Mira needs to be even worse. This should reflect on Tommy.

Need some more Trixie to make more of a contrast with Tristan.

Got ot skim again because I still missed quite a bit of scum.

Scum might not be the exact right word but I survived a traumatic brain injury and I think enough writers know what I mean.

Maybe I should have said there's a character who disassociates in it and I could have got a zillion beta readers under the age of 12. But I think I might use Alex Winter's idea of compartmentalizing the trauma. Yes something bad happened to that character, we'll just say a rocky pinnacle in a sea of what was until then a pretty traumatic existence, and their mind just noped it in to a deep dark corner which it protects from being found with distractions.

My goal is to tell a good story at the best of my abilities. No trigger warnings, no pandering, just the story I want to tell, fuck your fee fees it's about the characters.

It'll just take me a little while longer than I thought.

And self, when you print out a hard copy this time go thru an on demand printer and make it a paperback. Somehow that's a hell of a lot cheaper.

Little princess grr had the biggest growl in the litter, now that I know that's what the engine revving noise she was making before her eyes opened is. Puppers will go thru a phase where they just growl for no reason and then they suddenly stop.

On the moving side we're just waiting for it to pass inspection, should be super easy in a place without load bearing paint, and we can get the keys. For this place it only took a couple of days after the inspector accidentally called us instead of the owner and we had to give them his number.

People who have never moved or don't move a lot really have no idea what this liminal time in the hollow old place while you wait to get the new one is like. Then again I don't know what it would be like to move across country. Almost did but then I didn't.

And to add to things we got a call about the Life Ruiner from authorities back where she said she wanted to stay. Came to the agreement that while she could come back to the state should she want so the Smothering Unit can visit her it would have to be in a supervised living condition due to her mental state. It is a severe kind that needs professional help but the last time we saw her she refused to believe that she had such a condition and everyone else were 'crazy psychopaths'.

I am under no obligation to see her ever again, she is not allowed in my home. I even said that if the Smothering Unit wants the Life Ruiner back that she can have her but after I'm set up in my own place in a 55+ community. Fortunately clarity has come with separation and the realization the three of us are toxic together.

[akkivee]

h-hayama-san in pigtails……………. pigtails…………….

[duckymcdoorknob]

hey so i was kind of scrolling thru emergency request tags hoping someone would be open and i think you are? but pls don’t worry if not. anyway i’ve been job hunting for months and am running out of money and have been dealing with anxiety from hell over a potential super early morning job bc the anxiety of even applying has been giving me panic attacks and not eating or sleeping so, im trying to distract myself in anyway way i can wondered if maybe you could right something about osamu and atsumu comforting/helping their gender neutral s/o during such a stressful time??? thank u anyway if not tho

Of course I can help you!!

I hope you’re feeling a little better. Anxiety is a tough one to get over, so I’m proud of you for coming to me.

Please ask for help if you need!!

CW UNDER THE CUT: Severe Anxiety, panic attacks

𝑂𝑠𝑎𝑚𝑢 𝑀𝑖𝑦𝑎

While mainly stoic, Osamu loves with his whole heart.

So, when you hadn’t been as upbeat and happy to see him as per usual, he was instantly concerned for your well-being.

‘Samu noticed that you seemed to have a crushing weight on your shoulders, as you carried on with your days.

Despite your reassuring him that you were okay, he still had his doubts.

So, he took it upon himself to ensure that he did what he could to make you feel better.

Every morning, he’d text you to tell you he was thinking about you. Then, he’d offer to bring you something for lunch. If you said no, he told you he’d bring you something for dinner.

This man would offer to come over so many freaking times. He wouldn’t even have a plan, he just wanted to spend time with you.

Eventually, when the stress got super bad, you couldn’t hide the physical effects. You were sick to your stomach, sluggish and tired all of the time.

All was going well, until Osamu was over to watch a movie. The two of you were sitting side by side on the couch when your boyfriend suddenly spoke.

“Say, (Y/N), are you sure you’re feeling okay my love?” Osamu asked, hand sliding into yours.

While you wanted to lie, you just didn’t have it in you to do so. Instead, you simply fell sideways into your lover’s chest and burst into tears.

“Oh! Oh honey it’s okay, I’ve got you.” The silver haired boy shushed you as he instantly wrapped his arms around you.

He rubbed your back gently as your tears flowed out. Weeks of pent up stress, lack of sleep and sustenance came out in the form of lamenting sobs.

“Whenever you’re ready to talk, I’m ready to listen.” Osamu whispered as he kissed the crown of your head.

Your lover held onto you as if it would be the last time he did so. He gently rubbed the spot where your shoulder blades met with his thumb, worried that he hadn’t checked in on you in time.

“M’just so stressed, ‘Samu.” You finally whimpered out, “I’m running out of time and money and I have no idea when I’ll find a job.”

“Oh my darling why didn’t you tell me before?” He asked with a tinge of sweetness in his voice. “My dad is opening up a restaurant soon. I will talk to him and see if I can get you a job there, even if it’s only temporary.”

“This isn’t your fault, please believe me on that. Life comes in phases and we never know what may happen next. Currently, you’re just in a phase that isn’t the best. Time always moves forward, so you’re never stuck in a negative space forever.”

“Whenever the going gets tough, just remember to find a clock. Look at the seconds ticking away and remember that time doesn’t stop, no matter how bad the situation is.”

You smiled as you looked up and kissed your boyfriend’s cheek. “Thank you, ‘Samu. I love you.” You whispered.

“And I love you. Please don’t ever hesitate to reach out when you’re stressed and in need of some love.” the silver-haired boy replied. “Now, why don’t we find something interesting to do.”

“I’m in the mood to make some cookies.” You replied in a tiny voice.

The buzzing feeling of Osamu’s chest when he laughed was one you never wanted to forget. You hugged him tighter and never planned on letting go.

𝐴𝑡𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑢 𝑀𝑖𝑦𝑎

Like Osamu, Atsumu loves so deeply and wears his heart on his sleeve.

He just isn’t as attentive as his more sympathetic brother. It took him a while to notice your stress.

Days went on and you felt as if the world would implode if you made the wrong step.

Atsumu, though unknowing, always managed to give you a little bit of temporary relief.

His way of greeting you was to hug you from behind and blow a raspberry on your neck. His main goal was to hear your giggling, since he swore it made his mornings better.

He also had a habit of bringing you extra treats that his brother made. Though you knew Osamu always made an extra for you, Atsumu swore he was sacrificing his own treat to bring you one.

You loved these gestures, always falling more in love with your boyfriend after they occurred. Unfortunately, they weren’t enough to completely melt away the stress that was in your life.

The day Atsumu found out, he was proving to Osamu that he could cook. You and ‘Tsumu had planned a date at his house on that night.

You held your head high and forced a smile on your face. You figured that your anxiety would calm itself for a two hour date, then you could be anxious at home.

Oh how wrong you were…

As soon as you sat down at the table, the pent up anxiety inside you made you feel nauseous and gave you the familiar feeling of suffocation. You barely managed to choke out that you were excusing yourself to the restroom.

You left the table in such a hurry that the two Miya twins stared at each other, and Atsumu followed close in pursuit. When he reached the door, he heard your desperate gasps and sobs through it. He knocked gently and asked for you to at least unlock the door.

“Please, I don’t want you to suffer alone.” He said in a pleading tone.

When the door opened, he rushed inside and sat on the bathroom floor. He enveloped you in his arms and held you as you loudly cried. “I’ve got you, I’ve got you. You’re safe with me.”

Eventually, you dumped out all that was bothering you. You told him about the stress of not having money and no source of income, you told him about the time that seemed to be ticking away by the second.

The faux blonde rocked you back and forth as you sputtered out your story. He nodded along to show he was taking in every word you said. Eventually, he spoke softly.

“You don’t have to worry about it anymore. I will help you find a job even if I have to apply myself. You better have your social security number on hand.” He teased, hoping to elicit a reaction, “But regardless, I can help you more than you think.”

“My dad is opening a restaurant soon. I can see if he can give you the host job. Even if it’s only temporary, I want to help put you back on your feet. This is something that isn’t worth worrying about. You have every right to be upset and worried, but I don’t want something that can be fixed to be tearing you down this badly.”

“We can worry about other stuff, like whether or not I cooked a decent meal for us. You have to understand that life carries on, and that we can’t spend our time worrying that the clock will stop ticking by. Because as awful as this moment is, the hours will pass and we will be in a better one!” your lover ended his last sentence with a beaming smile.

You eventually did calm, and found the energy to release yourself from Atsumu’s embrace. The two of you left the bathroom to be met with Osamu at the stove, trying to keep the food from burning.

“You didn’t take your pan off the heat, idiot.” the silver-haired twin noted.

“Hey! I had a bigger priority thank you very much!” Your boyfriend barked in reply.

As you rested your cheek on your hand with a smile, you knew that this chaotic family was truly one you’d want to be a member of forever.

—————♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎—————

[gimyung]

Hi Jann!! I’d like to say, that I really like reading your thoughts on certain chapters of Lookism, and I ugly cackle every time because you’re so funny!!! 💀💞

Also, here are my questions for you:

How did Big Deal become your favorite crew?

Among the members of Big Deal, who do you think would tap out first if they were to all have a drinking competition? 🍺

Adding onto the drunk Big Deal members, what type of “drunk persona” do you think each member would have? 💀

Which Big Deal member do you think would have the best voice, if all of them were to go to karaoke together? 🎤

Do you think Samuel Seo would come back to be a part of Big Deal in the future? 😭

I’m sorry, that there’s a lot of questions! These are the thoughts I currently have at the moment about Big Deal, and I wanna know what are your thoughts on them. Been curious about this for a while now. 😅 In advance, thank you for taking the time to answer these questions and I hope you have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!! 😌🖤

thank you cat for reading my ramblings in here 😭

big deal got that shōnen anime vibes to them.

strong yet respectable boys who worked towards a humble goal — protect its members & the residents of the street they're in

ideology things whatever that is /j

loyal, disciplined, united (plz they even got a uniform)

they trust each other

every member matters (lineman used to give me the ick i'm sorry but he's an important member too! 🫶)

they got lua lmaoooo (besides being their intelligence agent, she helped evacuate the girls to a safer place 💖)

2. for a drinking competition (ik they're minors but), lua and lineman shall be the strongest. jerry tho, we gotta nerf him so it's gonna be him tapping out first. :p jake taking care of drunk jerry wld be fun to watch.

more blocks of text ahead, will put a cut here!

3. drunk personas:

lua - talkative drunk. accidentally spills information she recently gathered 💀

lineman - he doesn't get drunk, but takes care of everyone instead

brad - "what did you say to me?!", gets heated outta nowhere, starts petty fights which nobody pays attention to

jason - emotional!, talks to random big deal members about big deal's history

jerry - blacks out, it takes 5+ members to carry him to bed or any comfy surface, although the first thing he does when he wakes up is look for jake

jake - he tries to keep it in but gets up when an upbeat song comes on, he's a dancing drunk

sinu - dancing drunk, talkative drunk, emotional drunk. he goes thru all phases of drunkenness 😭

yeonhui - doesn't drink, TAKES PICS AND VIDS OF EVERYONE

sammy - doesn't drink w them but lurks wherever they are & stays, just to make sure jake and the big deal babygirls get home safe and don't start shit/cause trouble while drunk (had to include him 🫶 he used to be their strict no.3) (he drinks alone by that gangseo lighthouse tho)

4. big deal best voice goes to jake!

the members pour out drinks for him bc they're trying to get him drunk first 🤪 it's what everyone looks forward to!

5. yes yes yes. one day he'll get over his inferiority complex and look back at the ones who actually has his back. gonna throw away all that pride, and actually help big deal thrive more despite its humble beginnings 🫶 i'm all for sammy character development.

thank you for this ask! and if you made it here, thank you for enabling me talk. i love you ˘͈ᵕ˘͈ it's 1am in rn as i type 🥲