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theapprenticeofthanatos · 1 year

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TAoT: Chapter 19: An Unpleasant Visitor

Starting the next day, Danny was thrown into the hustle and bustle of life at Camp Half-Blood. He was glad for the distraction from the events of his first full day at camp. He hadn’t contacted Thanatos since his solo trip to the Underworld; Danny didn’t want to cause the god any more trouble than he already had. So, he was grateful that his schedule kept him busy.

Camp quickly began to feel like a second home. He even got used to the strange feeling in the attic. It reminded him of the Ghost Zone, in an especially eerie sort of way. He had even gone in once, just to see what was up there.

As soon as Danny crossed the threshold, he immediately got the feeling that he was not welcome. Usually, Danny didn't listen to such promptings, but he listened to this one. There was something about the attic that set his core on edge.

Danny left before anything could happen.

As the week progressed, Danny was thrown into a fun new routine. There were all sorts of classes offered at the camp, and Danny got to try lots of different things. Everyday in the mornings at about 9 AM, either Annabeth or Chiron taught him Ancient Greek, and half an hour before lunch they taught him Greek Mythology.

One day, while Annabeth was teaching him Greek Mythology, a thought crossed Danny’s mind. “Hey, Annabeth, I’ve got a question.”

She looked at him, curious. “Yeah?”

“What does it mean to promise something on the River Styx?” He remembered back when he had first met Thanatos, the god had made a promise to him on the River Styx. Danny hadn’t really thought anything of it at the time, but now…

Annabeth’s eyes widened. “You shouldn’t promise anything on the River Styx, Danny.” She said gravely. “Not unless it’s something that is very important to you. As in, willing-to-risk-your-life-for-it important.”

Danny felt a hint of dread begin to grow in his stomach. “… why’s that?”

“A promise made on the River Styx is binding.” Annabeth explained. “If it’s broken, there are serious repercussions for all parties involved.”

Danny gulped nervously. “Like… what? Death?”

“Worse than death.” Annabeth stressed.

Danny nodded and looked down at his hands. Thanatos had made a promise to Danny on the River Styx. Why would he do that? Was he really willing to face punishment if it was broken? Would Danny face consequences as well?

Danny decided not to dwell on it, at least for the time being.

On Monday, after his Ancient Greek lessons, Danny worked with Aurora on fighting with a sword and other bladed weapons. Danny quickly learned that he was not meant to wield a sword, so they mainly worked with daggers. After his weapons lesson came his private combat lesson with Chiron, since he couldn’t take pegasus-riding lessons (on the bright side, Danny didn’t have to clean the stables.)

“Where’s Mr. D?” Danny asked as he and Chiron entered the arena.

“Mr. D has been called to Olympus on official business.” Chiron explained. “He will be gone for the foreseeable future.”

“Oh, cool.” Danny was absolutely okay with not seeing the wine dude for the rest of spring break, and he didn’t think about it again as the lesson began.

During their first private combat lesson, Danny showed Chiron two of his powers: intangibility and invisibility (he wasn’t very comfortable with showing off his ecto-rays and other powers just yet.) Chiron seemed slightly disturbed by Danny’s abilities, but he took the news in stride, and helped Danny to incorporate those skills into their training.

After lunch, there was a tracking class. It was mostly for tracking animals and monsters, but Danny figured it could also be useful for ghost hunting. After that was cabin clean-up, but since Danny was not officially in the Hermes cabin (or any cabin, for that matter), he didn’t have to help with it. So, he had more free time than the other campers.

During his free time, Danny would go into the woods and explore (invisibly. He didn’t need the nymphs telling Mr. D anything else.) He also hung out with Annabeth when she had free time. They talked more about Amity Park and life at camp, but they also did other activities. They did some more sparring, and they also spent some time in the rec room (with a bit of help from his telekinesis, Danny was a master at ping pong, much to Annabeth’s chagrin.)

On Tuesday, Danny had archery with Sunny, javelin throwing with one of the Ares’ campers, and something the water nymphs taught called Ride the Rapids. On Wednesday, Danny helped Annabeth check inventory at the camp store (How did I not know this was here before?) and picked strawberries with some of the Demeter kids before lunch.

After lunch, Danny found himself in the camp forge, learning the basics of blacksmithing. It was fun, but Danny was glad to get out of the workshop later that day to go chop wood for that night’s campfire; it was far too hot in the forge for his liking.

After dinner each day was a campwide activity: on Monday, it was volleyball; Tuesday, it was unarmed combat; and Wednesday was Archery Knockout. Danny did not participate in any of the events. Even though Danny and Annabeth were on good terms (he would even say they were friends), he didn’t want to make her any more suspicious of him if he accidentally used his powers during one of the events again.

At the campfire after Archery Knockout, Annabeth asked him why he hadn't participated in any of the activities. Danny told her that he wasn't very good at volleyball and that he had pretty poor aim (okay, that one was a bold-faced lie; his aim was as good as his mom's.)

“Then why didn't you enter the unarmed combat tournament?” Annabeth countered.

Danny shrugged with a smirk. “Didn't want to embarrass anyone.”

Annabeth shook her head with a grin. “Careful. I might just tell Clarisse you said that.”

“Please don't.”

If Danny was being honest, he kind of enjoyed the break from his ghostly hero duties. So, of course, something had to happen while he was at camp.

On Thursday afternoon, Danny had wrestling class with Clarisse and her cabin. He was surprisingly good at the class, though that was likely because he had plenty of experience with hand-to-hand combat from ghost fighting. Clarisse was demonstrating a chokehold on one of her siblings when they suddenly heard a loud conch horn echo across the valley.

Clarisse’s expression turned serious and she stood to address the class. “Alright, training’s over!” She shouted. “Camp is under attack, go to our cabin and await orders!” She then turned to Danny. “You, stay here and stay outta the way.”

Danny was surprised to see everyone hurry out of the arena and towards the cabins. They act like the camp being attacked is a normal thing. Though, I wonder what’s out there? Danny had seen some strange monsters during his trips into the forest, such as giant ants and another cat-snake chimera (Danny made sure to stay far away from it.) His curiosity got the better of him, and he hurried outside to see what was happening.

Campers were running around frantically; some were suiting up at the armory, while others were sharpening swords at the forge. As he wondered what to do, Danny noticed a group of campers forming on the beach; some stood at the ready with weapons while others aimed readied bows at something floating above the water. He ran towards the group to see what was going on.

As soon as Danny’s feet hit the sand, his ghost sense went off. Oh, great.

“Ghost child! Come out and face me!” Skulker floated above the water. He fired a few ecto-blasts towards the group, but they seemed to bounce off of the air; was there some invisible force-field or something?

Danny would have to look into that later. At the moment, though, he needed to deal with the annoying hunter ghost (really, the correct term would be ‘ghost hunter,’ but that quickly got confusing with his parents’ line of work, so he referred to Skulker as ‘the hunter ghost.’)

About twenty feet from the group was a dock, with a canoe rack loaded with boats.

I can transform over there. Danny thought. He slipped away from the group and ran down to the dock. After ducking behind the rack and making sure he was alone, he transformed and went invisible. As a last minute thought, Danny flew to the Big House to grab his thermos before flying back to the group.

Skulker was still yelling and firing at the invisible force field. A few more campers had gathered as well, all armed and ready to fight.

Danny flew straight at the ghost, ramming into him. He grabbed Skulker and pulled him down into the ocean before he could react.

When they were about fifty feet from the shore and deep underwater, Skulker kicked Danny in the chest, knocking him back. “Ghost child! How nice of you to finally show up.” Skulker sneered.

Danny was not in the mood for this. “How did you find me, Skulker?” He snapped angrily.

“You are my prey, ghost child. I will always find you, and I will never stop hunting you until your pelt is at the foot of my bed!” Skulker extended his arm and fired a glowing white capture net at Danny.

“Yikes, dude.” Danny cringed as he dodged out of the way. “You need a new hobby.”

“And it seems that you have found one.” Skulker fired at Danny again. “Why are you so far from Amity Park?”

“I could ask you the same question!” Danny fired a few ecto-blasts at Skulker, who dodged most of them and growled in frustration at the ones he didn’t.

“Plasmius paid me handsomely to find where you ran off to, ghost child.” Skulker fired off a few ecto-blasts in Danny’s direction as he spoke. “Of course, I don’t need to be paid to hunt you down. It’s one of my favorite pastimes.”

“Like I said, find a new hobby!” Danny fired a double-handed ecto-blast that sent Skulker reeling backwards. He unclipped the Fenton Thermos from his belt. “And tell Plasmius to leave me alone when you see him in, oh, about a week!”

“What? NOOO!” Skulker wailed as he was sucked into the thermos. “IT’S SO CRAMPED IN HERE!”

Danny capped the thermos with a sigh. At least I thought to bring this. He then went invisible and returned to camp.

Upon returning to the beach, Danny saw that the group of maybe fifteen campers had positioned themselves in a loose phalanx formation, weapons bristling over their shields. Chiron was pacing behind the campers with his bow in his hands, tail flicking back and forth. Annabeth walked with him, and she was talking to him about something.

Crap, they’re gonna be on high alert for who knows how long because of Skulker. I-I’ve gotta do something. Danny needed to let the campers know the danger had passed, so he thought for a moment before coming up with what was, admittedly, a pretty stupid idea.

Danny moved to where Skulker’s shots had hit the invisible force-field and became visible.

The campers shouted in alarm and pointed their weapons at him; a few even shot arrows in his direction, but he easily dodged.

“Wait, I’m not the one that attacked you!” Danny hurriedly called out, holding his hands up in surrender.

Chiron ordered the campers to stand by and moved in front of the formation. “Who are you, and what are you doing here?” He demanded.

“I’m Phantom, and I was just passing by when I saw Skulker attacking you guys and decided to help.” Danny answered, noticing how Annabeth’s eyes lit up when he said his name.

“How do we know you didn’t order that thing to attack us?” Clarisse called out, pushing her way to the front of the formation.

Danny glared at her, offended that she would suggest such a thing. “I didn’t tell him to attack anyone! Skulker just tries to hunt me down so he can mount my ‘pelt’ on his wall,” He paused. “Or was it to make it into a rug?”

Several of the campers looked disgusted. Even Chiron looked disturbed. “Well, thank you for the help, Phantom.” The centaur acknowledged cautiously.

“You’re welcome.” Danny bowed nervously. “Now, I’d, uhh, better get going!” With that, Danny went invisible and flew back to the Big House, ignoring Chiron calling after him.

Danny fell to his knees as soon as his feet touched the floor of his room, breathing heavily. What the heck was I thinking? He thought as he transformed back to human form. They’re gonna find out, I shouldn’t have done that… Danny’s heart hammered in his chest as he pulled himself into a seated position and leaned against the bed, trying to control his breathing. Danny brought his knees to his chest and rested his head against them in an attempt to ground himself.

In, two, three, four. Out, two, three, four. Danny silently repeated a breathing exercise Jazz had taught him years ago for when his anxiety flared up.

After several minutes, Danny had managed to calm down and steady his breathing. He stood up just as someone knocked on his door. Taking one more deep breath, Danny opened the door to find Annabeth still in her armor. She pulled him into a hug before Danny could say anything.

“Whoa, Annabeth. You okay?” Danny asked, awkwardly hugging her back.

“You disappeared when that ghost showed up. No one knew where you went and I thought that…” Annabeth trailed off.

“Hey, I’m fine.” Danny said, pulling out of Annabeth’s hug to look her in the eye.

“Then why did you disappear?” Annabeth questioned.

Danny chuckled mirthlessly. “I’ve seen what Skulker is willing to do to get to his prey.”

Annabeth frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I live in Amity Park, remember?” Danny reminded her. “Skulker chasing Phantom is a common occurrence. I told you about him on Sunday.”

Annabeth nodded, but she still looked confused. “Why were both of them even here? They’ve never been recorded leaving Amity Park before.”

“Not true. Phantom’s been seen in Colorado, Wisconsin, and Maine.” Danny corrected, remembering his run-ins with Vlad and when he saved Nico and Bianca back in November. “And Skulker's also been seen in Wisconsin.”

“But why would they be here? On the shore of Camp Half-Blood?” She countered. “And why did Skulker mention a ‘ghost child’?”

Crap. Annabeth, why do you have to be so dang smart? Danny thought in frustration. “I… dunno, Annabeth. I can’t read ghosts’ minds.”

“Hmm.” Annabeth thought for a moment. “Was Skulker talking to you? ‘Cuz he only said it when you showed up.”

… Well, then.

Skulker is so gonna pay for this later. “Uhh, maybe? I mean, my parents are ghost hunters, so, uhh, ghosts tend to come after me and my sister a lot.” Danny said, rather lamely.

“I… guess that makes sense.” Annabeth said slowly. “You should probably go and see Chiron before he sends another search party for you.”

Danny rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I probably should.”

Annabeth smiled good-naturedly before heading back downstairs.

What am I even going to say to Chiron? Danny fretted, ruffling his hair in frustration. He paced around his room, trying to decide what to do. He could tell Chiron that he was Phantom, but that would open a whole other can of worms that Danny was not currently willing to deal with; would Chiron think that Danny was a monster or something? Would he make him leave the camp, or would he… would he just kill him? With how everyone had reacted to Phantom… Danny wasn’t sure if telling Chiron was the best idea.

He could also just tell Chiron nothing, but Danny had a feeling that that wouldn’t work, either. Just about everyone heard Skulker say ‘ghost child’, and it was likely that more than a few people knew that the ghost was referring to Danny after he had stepped onto the beach.

After several minutes of contemplation, Danny came to a decision: partial truths. He would tell Chiron the bare minimum. He really didn’t want to give the centaur any indication that he was Phantom or that he knew more than he was letting on, but he still needed to let him know that the camp was safe.

After taking a moment to mentally prepare himself, Danny walked down to the first floor. There he found Chiron, in his wheelchair, staring into the lit fireplace.

“Uh, hey, Chiron.” Danny greeted as he entered the parlor.

“Hello, Danny. I was wondering where you had gone.” Chiron turned to face him, a welcoming yet thoughtful look on his face. “Annabeth tells me that you have seen our… ‘visitors’ before in your hometown.”

Danny rubbed his neck. “Yeah, sorry about disappearing. I’ve, uhh, learned that whenever one of Phantom’s enemies shows up, it’s best to get out of the way.”

Chiron raised an eyebrow. “Oh? And why is that?”

“Well, when one of his enemies shows up, he’s often not far behind, and there’s usually a lot of mess and destruction afterwards.” Danny explained.

“I see.” Chiron nodded in understanding. “Luckily, despite that creature’s intentions, there was not any damage done here today.”

“I’ve been meaning to ask, what’s up with that?” Danny questioned. “Is there, like, a magic force-field or something around the camp?”

Chiron smiled in amusement. “Why, yes, I suppose that’s one way to put it. There is a magical barrier around the valley that protects us from outside forces.” Chiron’s smile faded as he changed the subject. “Danny, do you have any idea why those two showed up at this camp in the first place?”

Danny looked away guiltily. It’s my fault… my being here put the camp in danger. “Nope… no idea.”

Chiron watched him carefully. “What do you know about these ‘ghosts’?”

“Well, my parents are ghost hunters,” Danny answered more easily. “So I guess I know more than most people. These specific ghosts come from a place called the Ghost Zone. Tha- I mean, my mentor said that it used to be part of the Underworld.”

“Hmm,” Chiron leaned back in his wheelchair. “Well, those two were certainly not like any ghosts I’ve ever encountered. They seemed to have corporeal bodies, unlike most shades. And the mechanical one…”

“Skulker.” Danny supplied.

Chiron raised an eyebrow. “Skulker?”

Danny nodded. “That’s what he calls himself.”

Chiron looked unimpressed, but he continued. “Alright, then. ‘Skulker’ was able to physically attack the barrier, which makes me think he isn’t so much a ghost, as he is a monster. That in and of itself wouldn’t normally be too much of a problem, since monsters often try to enter the camp. What’s concerning is that he seems to be sentient. He was able to communicate with us, and where most monsters would be scared off, he chose to continue his assault. At least until the other one showed up.”

“Yeah, but it’s fine now, isn’t it?” Danny tried to assure him. “I-Phantom took care of Skulker, so the camp’s safe.”

Chiron didn’t look convinced. “I don’t know…” He trailed off as he watched the smoke crawl its way up into the chimney, before turning his attention back to Danny. “Speaking of your mentor, I think you should mention this to him.” Chiron said seriously. “Although Phantom helped us today, I don’t trust him. Ghosts never have good intentions, and spirits running loose in the mortal realm is dangerous. That’s why your mentor captures them and takes them back to the Underworld where they belong.”

Danny tried not to wince at the centaur’s words; he knew that Chiron didn’t know he was Phantom, but… it still hurt. “Yeah,” Danny mumbled. “I’ll talk to him tonight.”

First: Prologue

Previous: Chapter 18

Next: Chapter 20

#danny phantom #chiron #annabeth chase #clarisse la rue #skulker #taot #the apprentice of thanatos #lotu #legacy of the underworld #fanfiction #crossover fanfiction #percy jackson #percy jackson and the olympians

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autolenaphilia · 8 months

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I think about the article "Don't Call Me Mister You Fucking Beast" from 1972 a lot. It was written by Transvestite, Transsexual and Drag Queen group of the Gay Liberation Front, the British organization. Among its authors was Roz Kaveney and Rachel Pollack. in fact I discovered the text by reading Kaveney's obituary about Pollack, where Kaveney says Pollack was the major mind behind their manifesto.

Now "Don't Call me mister" is a fascinating and important text in general, and a part of trans history. The Gay Liberation Front is often remembered as a cis gay organization, but the fact was that trans people were a part of it, especially transfems. As the article mentions, their group didn't have transmasc members at the time, it was all people we today would describe as transfem. Contrary to some claims in the transmisogynistic British press, transfems were a part of the modern UK queer liberation movement from its beginnings.

Also transvestites and transsexuals were organized together. There is no "medicalism", distinctions are made between those on hrt, those who want it but don't have it yet (in large part due to medical gatekeeping) and those who don't want it, but it isn't treated as important. The claim of "mere" transvestites to be women is treated as valid. The text openly speaks of "transvestite, transsexual and drag-queen women."

The writers also see their struggle as women as part of the broader feminist wave going on at the time. "Think how much more inspiring and beautiful the women's revolution will be when it joyously includes all women." The text in many ways anticipates the concept of intersectionality.

The discussion of passing too is complex, and defends wanting to pass from the young who are "quick to say be militant, don't hide." because the reality is "if you pass you're treated as a human being, if you don't you're treated as a pervert or a roadshow." But the text also notes "Yet there are also thrills to not passing, or more precisely, not caring if you pass." and defends that as well. And the text notes that not all of them conform to feminine stereotypes and that there are butch transfems among them.

I was most recently reminded of this article due to the recent f1nnster discourse, because the article discusses that question as well. "Why is Danny La Rue [a popular drag artist of the time] a West End institution, when we get kicked out of our flats for wearing a skirt? Apparently it's all right if you're doing it for money, but perverted if you do it for personal satisfaction." And that about sums up the divide between men who crossdress as part of a show, and ordinary transsexual women and transvestites even today. Crossdressing as a gag or part of a show has always been more accepted than crossdressing for personal reasons, or transitioning.

The values of the text holds up well overall, and reveals that the "old-school transsexuals" of the 70s often had similar views about medical gatekeeping and passing that young trans people today often have.

#my writings #about other people's writings #gay liberation front #trans history #don't call me mister you fucking beast #roz kaveney #rachael pollack

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footprint-in-the-snow · 9 months

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I actually desperately want someone to explain every reference in the SATVB art please <3

okay so i havent figured out Everything but this is most of what i can gather. sorry there arent links to specific references im not supposed to be doing this i need to be packing for uni 😭 but this is everything off the top of my head !

starting from the left wall theres the peep show poster which matty has said to be his favourite show in a reddit comment, idk what the streets poster is a reference to, the ghost on an island is an antichrist reference 'theres a ghost on this island' and then the petrol can is an its not living reference as 'danny works in a petrol station'

so the back wall obviously the cancelled banner for lols, 4 days since last incident as a general meme reference?, do not use emergency only is likely a reference to mattys abstinence from social media and being a bit OTG, flushed away poster is obvious, the fake matty quote which he never said and was on the problematic, oasis poster as they need to stop marding and get back together!!! from Q with Tom Powell and various other Oasis call outs, Maroon 5 as problemattic beef, Newcastle United as duh, Frozen as he referenced liking frozen in a couple 2014 interviews particularly the moshcam (?) one, idk about the IDs and then the box from the philharmonic orchestra album, the icon from the mind shower detox thing they did for notes which was a 3d tour thing that's still up and then the height chart as matty is short <3 and the good boy points which i dont know what it is referring to specifically but i think its funny

now the window/right wall has la poesie est dans la rue is etched into the tree and is an easter egg in quite a few music videos and is a reference to love it if we made it, the minion i assume is a reference to the deuxmoi thing of matty sending minion memes to a girl, and then a camera i assume is a general comment on the lack of privacy you get as a celebrity and 'house with just three walls' etc

the couch and table has matty smoking and chained to the couch as a reference to the consumption bit and could be reference to the idea that he is stuck in a position of his own doing, hann is a wizard i presume as a hobbit reference? and then the dubai and malaysia flags as he got banned,oxygen tank from consumption, cross due to the religious signposting on his ig story and a juxtaposition to his atheism, thesaurus for those big words, infinite jest as its referenced in sincerity is scary, wine, cigarettes, xanax as a reference to 'Xanax and a newport' in part of the band, i live cum mug from the problemattic, american flag as a lot of their music is informed by Americana especially on notes(? maybe also just because america)

then on the floor here theres the coke bottles as matty cannot be seen without one, the piss/apple juice from when he was spotted with gabbriette, the fox i saw on twitter means temptation so could be a very subtle hint towards temptation from porn and the right and so on, raw meat from consumption and its being 'swept under the rug' so could be a metaphor for matty being problematic and it being glossed over by him, hairdye as there was twitter rumour he dyed his grays and matty has previously said he would not, flame and wok box as the boys used to work there, typewriter from the typed up letters he used to do but u dont know what 'im not a beatnik im a catholic' is a reference to, true romance is one of mattys favourites and was a key inspiration for the robbers video

i have no clue what this is other than human blunt? and seeds and beans? as a gyat reference? help?

this corner has the married computer so man who married a robot, lotion and tissues for activities, cow with glassjaw hoodie as a nod to when we are together and also the nme interview where he mentions that hoodie as the one he put on at 13 and took off at 19 if im correct, grass block from satvb promo, tent could be a nod to reading and leeds? then skeleton with the lab coat i dont know exactly but i think it could be another problemattic reference with me on the brain, and then 2013 george with his blue gatorade as in most gigs you can see his blue gatorade with its own stand!! (though i watched trsmnt the other day and it was orange) and he is producing i think it could have been drawn from a photo but i cba to find it

and last but not least, ross!!! who is also jesus as there were lots of memes surrounding him looking like jesus or being a personal jesus and so on, also could be to do with the problemattic post of ricky gervais on the cross for being an atheist, penguin!! because ross likes penguins, bees are a manchester symbol, beer, robber with the iconic 2014 shirt, greggs sausage roll i presume from when one got thrown onstage but also the twitter meme of 'i saw matty crying in x greggs' and then i think the last on is a mortal kombat character and nearly forgot but ross also has a lamp as he turned off the lamps at the end of when we are together during atvb on stage

#sorry if this is really messy and jumbled #but hopefully its a good overview!!#ethan goes off on one again #the 1975 #matty healy #ross macdonald #adam hann #george daniel #at their very best #asks

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esf-art-and-design · 4 months

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Comprehensive list of Queer Pop Artists (wether through themes in songs or through confirmed ID) you could be supporting instead of throwing a fit over the fact that Swift is not gay and would really like if y’all stopped speculating (because it’s wrong to boil someone down to who they bone, and dangerous and harmful to out someone, thought we knew this as the queer community, but I digress)

List was created by a now deleted account on Reddit, so I can’t credit the exact person who created it

A Comprehensive List of LGBTQ+ Pop Music Act’s

additional reference: /u/[**frogaranaman**](https://www.reddit.com/user/frogaranaman/)**'s list divided by identity:** [**https://www.reddit.com/r/popheads/comments/c3rpga/happy\_pride\_in\_honor\_of\_the\_month\_here\_is\_a\_list/**](https://www.reddit.com/r/popheads/comments/c3rpga/happy_pride_in_honor_of_the_month_here_is_a_list/)

^(i divided by genre, so some people appear on multiple lists. I am not a musicologist; please do not ask me why i categorized an artist in one genre, but not the other. if the grammys never even get it right, how can i?)

**methodology**: i included artists who give a clear answer being a part of the community, have had it verified being queer and/or queerness some tangible way, have passed, and/or discuss queer themes in the first person in a moderate or significant part of their body of work. ^(i did not include comedy artists, so you will not see too many camp acts or drag queens here.)

**key**:

* *\** = person and/or representation of color, mostly black

* *(+)* = noticeably problematic

* *(#)* \- uses queer themes or narrators often, but not verified

if I missed someone, or misidentified someone, post a response with their name and genre. i will edit & include them.

# adult contemporary

* ben abraham *\**

* jennifer knapp

* will young

* sam smith

* billy porter *\**

* michaela jai *\**

# alternative folk & country

* orville peck

* adeem the artist

* tj osborne / brothers osbourne

* angel olson

* joy oladokun *\**

* sufjan stevens (#)

* evil *\**

* kd lang

* izzy heltai

* trixie mattel

* steve grand

* adrianne lenker (of big thief)

# alternative hip-hop & rap

* taylor bennett *\**

* snow tha product *\**

* zebra katz *\**

* shygirl *\**

* rob.b *\**

* tiger goods *\**

* naeem ***(formerly spank rock)*** *\**

* mykki blanco *\**

* princess nokia *\**

* mahawam *\**

* heems *\**

* saul williams *\**

* kalifa ***(formerly le1f)*** *\**

* omar apollo *\**

* keanan *(drill) \**

* drebae *\**

* cuee *\**

* junglepussy *\**

* angel haze *\**

* mista strange *(drill) \**

* the last artful, dogdr *\**

* dizzy fae *\**

* kelechi\*\*\*

* ilovemakonnen *\**

* kamaiyah *\**

* kidd kenn *(drill) \**

* leikeli47 *\**

* isaiah rashad *\**

* dai burger *\**

* azealia banks ***(+)*** *\**

* chicka *\**

* jaboukie *\**

* dapper dan midas *\**

* baby tate *\**

* kevin abstract / brockhampton *\**

* cakes da killa *\**

* iamjakehill / ur pretty

* cazwell

* lil lotus

* lil aaron

# alternative pop

* purple crush

* aurora

* st. vincent

* black dresses

* anohni

* maggie lindemann

* scott matthew

* oscar and the wolf

* steve lacy *\**

* dreamer isioma *\**

* vaultboy

* coco & clair clair *\**

* shamir *\**

* empress of *\**

* cat burns *\**

* kučka

* king mala

* lava la rue *\**

* devonte hynes / blood orange *\**

* jessica 6 *\**

* naeem ***(formerly spank rock)****\**

* adore delano / danny noriega *\**

* orion sun *\**

* dizzy fae *\**

* pvris

* japanese breakfast *\**

* dorian electra

* yeule

* kevin abstract / brockhampton *\**

* christine & the queens

* davy boi *\**

* declan mckenna

* yungblud

* jazmin bean

# alternative r&b

* durand bernarr *\**

* keiynan lonsdale\*

* frank ocean *\**

* noah davis

* serpentwithfeet \*

* joy oladokun *\**

* isaac dunbar *\**

* kwaye *\**

* steve lacy *\**

* kelechi *\**

* ray laurel *\**

* mac ayres

* orion sun *\**

* kyle dion *\**

* janelle monae *\**

* kelela *\**

* jeremy pope *\**

* syd / the internet *\**

* jamila woods *\**

* kehlani *\**

* mahawam *\**

* 070 shake *\**

* davy boi *\**

* destin conrad *\**

* michelle (band) *\**

* cat burns *\**

* coco & breezy *\**

* arlo parks *\**

* devonte hynes / blood orange *\**

* bartees strange *\**

* brayton bowman *\**

* bronze avery *\**

* cain culto ***(formerly ecclesia)*** *\**

* olivia o'brien

# SPOTLIGHT: arab, persian, & desi / south-asian artists

* the muslims *\**

* hamed sinno / mashrou’ leila *\**

* wafia *\**

* remi wolf *\**

* rostam / vampire weekend \*

* heems \*

* freddy mercury / queen *\**

* leo kalyan *\**

* lil darkie ***(+)*** *\**

* dounia *\**

* dua saleh *\**

* raveena *\**

* mavi phoenix *\**

* ray laurel\*

# black & urban contemporary gospel

* kevin terry \*

* mo heart \*

* resistance revival chorus \*

* james cleveland \*

* sister rosetta tharpe \*

* tonex / b.slade \*

* donnie mcclurkin \*

# blues / jazz / spoken word

* billy wright \*

* bessie smith \*

* frankie "half pint" jaxon \*

* big mama thorton \*

* johnny mathis \*

* ethel waters \*

* billie holiday \*

* little richard \*

* ma rainey \*

* billy strayhorn \*

* langston hughes\*

# camp

* iamjakehill / ur pretty

* jaboukie \*

* qaadir howard \*

# contemporary r&b

* whitney houston \*

* monifah \*

* iman jordan\*

* 070 shake\*

* bree runway\*

* coco & breezy\*

* dreamer isioma\*

# christian & worship

* william matthews\*

* semler

* ecclesia ***(now known as cain culto) \****

* sufjan stevens **(#)**

* jennifer knapp

* vicky beeching

* dion davis\*

* joy oladokun\*

* ethel cain

* julien baker

* dan haseltine / jars of clay

* ray boltz

# djs / producers

* kaytranda \*

* amorphous \*

* sophie

* mnek \*

* mike q \*

# electronic / disco / industrial

* woodkid

* robert alfons / tr/st

* bright light bright lights

* k flay

* beth ditto

* midnight pool party \*

* sylvester \*

* eartheater

* christine & the queens

* zee machine

* yves tumor \*

* passion pit

* the sound of arrows

* peaches

* fever ray / the knife

* hercules and love affair

* jessica 6 \*

* kele okereke / bloc party\*

* shura

* madison rose\*

* michael medrano

* shamir \*

* shygirl \*

# house / ballroom house

* little louie vega / masters at work\*

* azealia banks ***(+)*** \*

* tt the artist\*

* cake da killa\*

* kevin jz prodigy\*

* purple crush

* miss jay\*

* kevin aviance \*

* rupaul \*

# hyper / power pop

* 100 gecs

* that kid \*

* dorian electra

* mika \*

# indie & progressive pop

* mickey darling (#)

* fhat \*

* cub sport

* moses sumney \*

* kele okereke / bloc party\*

* minute taker

* morgxn

* shamir \*

* muna (\*)

* tawnted

* the aces

* rostam / vampire weekend \*

* this japanese house

* tinashe \*

* angel olson

* mothica

* peter thomas

* japanese breakfast \*

* lava la rue \*

* royal & the serpent

* michelle (band) \*

* semler

* pale waves

* perfume genius

* gabriel garzon montano \*

* declan mckenna

* the sound of arrows

* fever ray / the knife

* kali

* lava la rue

* girl in red

* bartees strange \*

* jake shears / scissor sisters

* ethel cain

* devonte hynes / blood orange \*

* purple crush

* tegan & sara

* oliver sim / the xx

* ssion

# indie rock

* kele okereke / bloc party \*

* cosmo jarvis ***(#)***

* oliver sim / the xx

* car seat headrest

* big thief

* now, now

* lucy dacus / boygenius

* rostam / vampire weekend \*

* boyish

* julien baker

* black belt eagle scout \*

* ethel cain

* courtney barnett

* pale waves

* joe talbot / idles

* le tigre

* john grant / the czars

* lava la rue \*

# SPOTLIGHT: indigenous artists

* black belt eagle scout \*

* keiynan lonsdale\*

* trixie mattel \*

# k-pop

* mrshll\*

* holland\*

* lionesses\*

* jiae / wa$$up\*

* wonho\*

# SPOTLIGHT: latinidad & latine artists

* arca \*

* ricky martin\*

* villano antillano \*

* cain culto (formerly ecclesia) \*

* tokischa \*

* mad tsai \*

* snow tha product \*

* 070 shake \*

* anitta \*

* kali uchis \*

* blue rojo \*

* pablo vittar \*

* maria becerra\*

* kaytranda \*

* omar rudberg \*

* empress of \*

* michaela jai \*

* willie gomez \*

* jessica 6 *\**

* mabiland \*

* princess nokia \*

* omar apollo \*

* adore delano / danny noriega \*

* omar rudberg \*

* adriano cintra / css \*

* young m.a \*

* gabriel garzon montano \*

* pablo alborán

* bentley robles \*

Also adding in general (not pop necessarily)

Elton John

Queen/Freddie Mercury

Lzzy Hale/ Halestorm

Taylor Momsen/ The Pretty Reckless

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sco07ut · 1 year

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RIGHT OKAY I WENT OUT FOR A MEAL WITH MY GRANDMA AND IDK HOW WE GOT ONTO THE TOPIC BUT WE WERE TALKING ABT COMEDY SHOWS AND SHE WAS TALKING ABT HIW SHE WAS ACCIDENTALLY LAUGHING REALLY LOUDLY AT THIS ONE SHOW AND SAID ‘IT WAS A SHOW BY A DRAG QUEEN CALLED DANNY LA RUE AND MY ENTIRE BRAIN JUST WENT ??!?!??!!!!!!! BECAUSE IN THAT VERY MOMENT IT SUDDENLY OCCURRED TO ME THAT NANNY LA ROO IN YONDERLAND IS A FUCKIGN PARODY OF DANNY LA RUE LORD HELP ME I KNEW THE CHARACTER HAD TO BE A NOD TO SOMETHING BUT I JUST NEVER KNEW WHO

#yonderland #nanny la roo #nanny le roo #? the wiki says le but i don’t believe it #mat baynton #mathew baynton

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wanderingmind867 · 8 months

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I've been trying to make a fancast for if the Percy Jackson series was made in the 1980s and 1990s. It's half Fancasting and half Faceclaims. Here's some of the ones I'm proud of so far:

Sally Jackson: Sally Field

Gabe Ugliano: Danny DeVito (Danny DeVito could also be Coach Hedge. Dual role maybe. Besides, I like Danny DeVito).

Chiron: Kevin Kline

Dionysus: Bill Murray (I'm not fully sold on this one, but I think it could possibly work. Bill Murray's got the deadpan comedy down). It's either Bill Murray or Tim Curry or maybe even Joe Flaherty.

Ares: Sylvester Stallone (I feel like he's one of the biggest action stars of the 1980s. He might honestly be able to play a god of war pretty well. His unique accent could even add to Ares as a character).

Medusa: Eartha Kitt (For some reason, i can't unsee this one. Eartha Kitt makes a great Aunty Em, to me).

These are just a few of them. Any more suggestions would be helpful. There's no way I'll get this all done by myself. I haven't even gotten past the Lightning Thief yet in my fancasting. I'm hung up on a few people (I'll list them):

Percy Jackson

Annabeth Chase

Grover Underwood

Clarisse La Rue

Zeus

Poseidon

Hades

Mrs. Dodds (I've got an idea but nothing settled)

The Three Fates

Charon

And many more.

I've made attempts at every character except these ones, so I need help/suggestions in order to keep going. Reblog for exposure please. Otherwise I don't know if anyone will see this. Here's the link:

Edit: Please reblog if you can! This cast list is still pretty much stuck where it always was! I need help adding names! So reblogs for exposure would be helpful!

#percy jackson #rick riordan #pjo #riordanverse #pjo series #pjo hoo toa #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #hoo #the lighting thief #the lightning thief #annabeth chase #grover underwood #fancast #fan casting #zeus #poseidon #hades #please reblog

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queen-of-wisdom · 5 months

Text

The Antichrist, Son of Satan, Destroye- Adam Young

Okay guys, I know we all love Crowley or adore Aziraphale or wish to be Anathema but we need to talk about Adam (as in the Antichrist not the Adam in the beginning but we get to that later).

Although Adam Young has (at best) 30 minutes worth of screen time he is The Main Character. He is the reason the plot starts, the spirit of the story.

But he barely gets mentioned in Fandom. At all.

So here are my Adam Young Analysises and Headcanons, that I always wanted to share and discuss.

Adam Young and Adam (as in the Beginning) are a direct parallel to each other (and I think Neil and Terry intended it that way ( I know it's bold to use first name, assumption of thought etc. on literally the only celebrity I know of who is on Tumblr but I'll do it anyway. You can't stop me))

Adam Young (who I will call Antichrist in this section) and Adam are given the exact same choice: do something that will anger their creator or live their life in their own image.

Adam ate the fruit of wisdom, was banished by God, but now he was free. He lived on earth (not in Eden) and wasn't tied to any occult or eteral powers.

The Antichrist didn't start Armageddon, was banished by Satan, but now he was free. He lived on earth (that he didn't destroy) and wasn't tied to any occult or eteral powers.

In conclusion, the parallel of these two and I may add something later to it.

2. Adam definitely turned into a punk later in life.

Think about it: he rebelled against the establishment, is frustrated with the state of the world and has a fellow alternative (eg. a witch) as neighbor. Definitely a punk.

3. He will become a Percy Jackson, Danny Fenton, Hazel Levesque, Sadie Kane and Adora (She-Ra) kinnie

No, I won't eleborate.

4. I would like to explore the angst that comes from being the literal son of the devil.

As in like "My father is the worst man alive but I am his favorite daughter" (- Clarisse La Rue, The demigod diaries (ig))

I mean c'mon, for a fandom that is so obsessed with angst this topic is so untouched and I've seen like two fanfic's with that theme.

5. When Adam and Jesus are ever going to meet, they would be definitely friends from the shared experiences but Adam would never really understand him.

Okay, I think I have to explain that one.

First of, I'm going to assume they're a similar age (Jesus when he was younger, Adam when he is older - so.much.to.explore).

They are both the sons of the bosses of supernatural beings.

They have both human friends that can't really get them.

They both trust humanity to change.

But I don't think that Adam could understand why Jesus sacrificed himself and didn't just told everyone to fuck off (like he did).

WHERE ARE MY ANGSTY FANFUCS GUYS

#good omens #Adam #adam young #the antichrist #so much unexplored potential guys #I need my fanfics #otherwise i'll scream #english isn't my first language #please have mercy

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densesindealer · 3 months

Text

My Full Muse List, Updated

I decided to go through and update my entire muse list, adding and removing characters, and I decided to make a post with the list that I intend to give easy to find tags on my blog, or to pin it later on.

All male muses can be used for gender transformation asks, and any males from their series can be used for gender transformation asks so long as they follow the other rules of my blog. This applies even if a male character from the series isn't normally on my muse list as their male counterpart. I.E. Byakuya from Danganronpa as a woman with Makoto, or Bakugou from My Hero Academia as a woman with Midoriya.

Danganronpa

Makoto Naegi

Junko Enoshima

Mukuro Ikusaba

Celestia Ludenberg

Aoi Asahina

Sayaka Maizono

Kyoko Kirigiri

Sakura Oogami

Toko Fukawa

Chiaki Nanami

Mikan Tsumiki

Hiyoko Saionji

Akane Owari

Peko Pekoyama

Ibuki Mioda

Mahiru Koizumi

Sonia Nevermind

Komaru Naegi

Kanon Nakajima

Hiroko Hagakure

Kotoko Utsugi

Monaca Towa

Chisa Yukizome

Miaya Gekkogahara

Seiko Kimura

Aiko Umesawa

Ando Ruruka

Kirumi Tojo

Tsumugi Shirogane

Angie Yonaga

Tenko Chabashira

Maki Harukawa

Miu Iruma

Kaede Akamatsu

Himiko Yumeno

Spy x Family

Yor Forger

Anya Forger

League Of Legends

Ahri

Akali

Senna

Miss Fortune

Lux

Jinx

Vex

Xayah

Annie

Ashe

Caitlyn

Irelia

Seraphine

Morgana

Neeko

My Hero Academia

Izuku Midoriya

Momo Yaoyorozu

Ochako Uraraka

Mina Ashido

Tsuyu Asui

Toru Hagakure

Kyouka Jirou

Mei Hatsume

Melissa Shield

Nejire Hado

Nemuri Kayama/Midnight

Rumi Usagiyama/Mirko

Kaoruko Awata/Bubble Girl

Emi Fukukado/Ms. Joke

Ryuku Tatsuma/ Ryukyu

Yu Takeyama/Mt. Lady

Shino Sosaki/Mandalay

Ryuko Tsuchikawa/Pixie-Bob

Tomoko Shiretoki/Ragdoll

Inko Midoriya

Mitsuki Bakugou

Kinoko Komori

Tokage Setsuna

Yui Kodai

Ibara Shiozaki

Pony Tsunotori

Itsuka Kendo

Reiko Yanagi

Himiko Toga

Manami Aiba/La Brava

Nana Shimura

Camie Utsushimi

Chitose Kizuki/Curious

Fuyumi Todoroki

Rei Todoroki

Kaina Tsutsumi/Lady Nagant

Merlin (BBC Series)

Merlin Ambrosius

Morgana Le Fay

High Priestess Nimueh

Harry Potter

Cho Chang

Luna Lovegood

Fleur DeLacour

Gabrielle DeLacour

Hermione Granger

Katie Bell

Alicia Spinnet

Angelina Johnson

Lavender Brown

Susan Bones

Hannah Abbott

Daphne Greengrass

Astoria Greengrass

Bellatrix Lestrange

Narcissa Malfoy

Pansy Parkinson

Nymphadora Tonks

Andromeda Tonks

Aurora Sinistra

Septima Vector

Tracey Davis

Rowena Ravenclaw

Helena Ravenclaw

Penelope Clearwater

Amelia Bones

Lily-Evans Potter

Rose Weasley

Lily Luna Potter

Sue Li

Romilda Vane

Padma Patil

Parvati Patil

Mirabel Garlick

AI The Somnium Files

Kaname Date

Aiba

Shizure Kuranushi/Boss

Mizuki Okiura

Iris Sagan

Amame Doi

Phoenix Wright

Mia Fey

Maya Fey

Pearl Fey

Trucy Wright

Ema Skye

Franziska von Karma

Athena Cykes

Lana Skye

The Great Ace Attorney Chronicles

Ryunosuke Naruhodo

Susato Mikotoba

Iris Wilson

Nikolina Pavlova

Gina Lestrade

Percy Jackson

Hazel Levesque

Piper McLean

Annabeth Chase

Reyna Ramirez-Arellano

Thalia Grace

Zoe Nightshade

Clarisse La Rue

Rachel Elizabeth Dare

Silena Beauregard

Sally Jackson

Bianca di Angelo

Calypso

Athena

Artemis

Aphrodite

Hera

Demeter

Hestia

Hecate

Persephone

Scooby-Doo

Norville ‘Shaggy’ Rogers

Daphne Blake

Velma Dinkley

Thorn

Luna

Dusk

Tanis The Mummy

Sibella Dracula

Phantasma

RWBY

Jaune Arc

Ruby Rose

Weiss Schnee

Blake Belladonna

Yang Xiao-Long

Pyrrha Nikos

Nora Valkyrie

Coco Adel

Velvet Scarlatina

Glynda Goodwitch

Cinder Fall

Neopolitan

Emerald Sustrai

Ilia Amitola

Winter Schnee

Willow Schnee

Kali Belladonna

Summer Rose

Raven Branwen

Salem

Penny Polendina

Neon Katt

Saphron Cotta-Arc

Terra Cotta-Arc

Street Fighter

Chun-Li

Cammy White

Rainbow Mika

Mortal Kombat

Johnny Cage

Cassie Cage

Kitana

Mileena

Tanya

Jade

Sindel

Skarlet

Jacqui Briggs

Li Mei

Cetrion

Sareena

Fairy Tale

Erza Scarlet

Lucy Heartfilia

Brandish U

Konosuba

Wiz

Aqua

Megumin

Darkness

Yunyun

Avatar The Last Airbender

Katara

Toph Beifong

Azula

Ty Lee

Danny Phantom

Ember Mclain

Dani Phantom

Sam Manson

Jazz Fenton

Madeline Fenton

Desiree

Johnny Test

Susan Test

Mary Test

Sissy Blakely

Lila Test

DC Comics

Bruce Wayne/Batman

Harleen Quinzel/Harley Quinn

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy

Thalia al Ghul

Zatanna Zatara/Zatanna

Barbara Ann Minerva/Cheetah

Diana Prince/Wonder Woman

Teen Titans

Richard ‘Dick’ Grayson/Robin/Nightwing

Rachel Roth/Raven

Komand’r/Blackfire

Tara Strong/Terra

Jynx

Arrowverse

Oliver Queen/Green Arrow

Barry Allen/The Flash

Nyssa al Ghul

Sara Lance/White Canary

Laurel Lance/Black Canary

Thea Queen/Speedy

Shado Fei

Caitlin Snow/Killer Frost

Kara Zor-El/Supergirl

Marvel Comics/MCU

Peter Quill/Star-Lord

Peter Parker/Spider-Man

Leopold ‘Leo’ Fitz

Steve Rogers/Captain America

Jennifer Walters/She-Hulk

Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow

Jean Grey

Emma Frost

Mary Jane Watson

Gwen Stacy

Gamora

Mantis

Susan Storm/The Invisible Woman

Wanda Maximoff/Scarlet Witch

Elektra

Kamala Khan/Mrs. Marvel

Carol Danvers/Captain Marvel

Felicia Hardy

Kitty Pryde

X-23

Mystique

Ava Ayala/White Tiger

Lady Sif

Daisy Johnson/Quake

Jemma Simmons

Melinda May

Genshin Impact

Aether

Lumine

Amber

Kamisato Ayaka

Barbara

Jean

Beidou

Ningguang

Collei

Diona

Klee

Qiqi

Paimon

Eula

Rosaria

Fischl

Mona

Ganyu

Keqing

Yoimiya

Raiden Shogun

Kujou Sara

Yae Miko

Hu Tao

Sangonomiya Kokomi

La Signora

Lisa

Noelle

Shenhe

Sucrose

Xiangling

Yelan

Code Geass

Lelouch Lamperouge/Lelouch vi Britannia

C.C.

Cornelia li Britannia

Euphemia li Britannia

Nunnally vi Britannia

Kallen Kouzuki

Villetta Nu

Kaguya Sumeragi

Shirley Fenette

Milly Ashford

Nina Einstein

Cecile Croomy

Infinite Stratos

Ichika Orimura

Chifuyu Orimura

Madoka Orimura

Cecilia Alcott

Laura Bodewig

Lingyin Huang/Rin

Charlotte Dunois

Houki Shinonono

Tabane Shinonono

Tatenashi Sarashiki

Kanzashi Sarashiki

Maya Yamada

Guilty Crown

Shu Ouma

Inori Yuzuriha

Hare Menjou

Haruka Ouma

Mana Ouma

Tsugumi

Ayase Shinomiya

Durarara!!

Mikado Ryuugamine

Celty Sturluson

Anri Sonohara

Super Mario Bros/Super Crown

Luigi

Bowsette

Booette

Rosalina

Princess Peach

Princess Daisy

Shy Gal

Undertale

Frisk

Chara

Toriel

Undyne

Muffet

Temmie

Five Nights At Freddy’s

Toy Chica

Roxanne Wolf

Glamrock Chica

Vanessa

Vanny

Every Male Animatronic As A Female

Kingdom Hearts/Disney

Sora

Kairi

Aqua

Xion

Larxene

Namine

Mulan

Elsa

Go Go Tomago

Belle

Cinderella

Alice

Snow White

Rapunzel

Helen Parr/Elastigirl

Violet Parr

Mirage

Judy Hopps

Your Turn To Die

Sara Chidoun

Maple

Tia Safalin

Reko Yabusame

Kanna Kizuchi

Huniepop

Tiffany Maye

Audrey Belrose

Kyu Sugardust

Kyanna Delrio

Celeste Luvendass

Nekopara

Chocola

Vanilla

Coconut

Azuki

Maple

Cinnamon

Spartacus

Ilithyia

Mira

Persona Series

Yu Narukami

Akira Kurusu/Joker

Chie Satonaka

Yukiko Amagi

Naoto Shirogane

Rise Kujikawa

Margaret

Marie

Ann Takamaki

Shiho Suzui

Makoto Niijima

Haru Okumura

Futaba Sakura

Kasumi Yoshizawa

Sae Niijima

Tae Takemi

Sadayo Kawakami

Pixie

Angel

Succubus

Silky

Apsaras

Cybele

Yaksini

Ishtar

Leanan Sidhe

Clotho

Lachesis

Atropos

Hua Po

Lilim

Maria

Pokemon Series

Hypno

Rosa

Elesa

Hilda

May

Dawn

Jessie

Lillie

Lusamine

Bea

Serena

Misty

Officer Jenny

Nurse Joy

Nessa

Cynthia

Flannery

Marnie

Lorelai

Mallow

Serena

Sonia

Akari

Mai

Arezu

Irida

Palina

Magma Admin Courtney

Nemona

Iono

Tulip

Professor Sada

Professor Juniper

Rika

Dendra

Carmine

Doki Doki Literature Club

Monika

Yuri

Sayori

Natsuki

Overwatch

Hana Song/D.VA

Amelie Lecroux/Widowmaker

Ana Amari/Ana

Angela Ziegler/Mercy

Lena Oxton/Tracer

Olivia Colomar/Sombra

Fareeha Amari/Pharah

Elizabeth Caledonia Ashe/Ashe

Brigitte Lindholm/Brigitte

Echo

Mei-Ling Zhou/Mei

Kiriko Komori/Kiriko

Illari Quispe Ruiz/Illari

Zero Escape

Sigma Klim

Phi

Alice

Clover Field

Mira

Luna

Hazuki Kashiwabara/Lotus

Akane Kurashiki

Resident Evil

Ethan Winters

Leon Scott Kennedy

Mia Winters

Claire Redfield

Jill Valentine

Sherry Birkin

Ada Wong

Rebecca Chambers

Sheeva Alomar

Bela Dimitrescu

Ashley Graham

Eveline

Dragon Ball Z

Broly

Android 18

Android 21

Cheelai

Bulma

Chi-Chi

Towa

Vados

Kusu

Marcarita

Bioshock Infinite

Booker Dewitt

Elizabeth Comstock

Helltaker

Modeus

Lucifer

Cerberus

Judgement

Azazel

Malina

Pandemonica

Justice

Beelzebub

Zdrada

Kim Possible

Ron Stoppable

Bonnie Rockwaller

Shego

Kim Possible

Monster High

Draculaura

Clawdeen Wolf

Cleo de Nile

Lagoona Blue

Toralei Stripe

Abbey Bominable

Venus McFlytrap

Spectra Vondergeist

Final Fantasy

Tifa Lockhart

Aerith Gainsborough

Yuffie Kisaragi

Jessie Rasberry

Stardew Valley

Haley

Emily

Abigail

Leah

Maru

Robin

Jodi

Caroline

Animal Crossing

Isabella

Ankha

Fauna

Judie

Diana

Infamous Second Son

Delsin Rowe

Abigail ‘Fetch’ Walker

Saints Row

The Boss

Shaundi

Kinzie Kensington

Asha Odekar

KiKi DeWynter

Viola DeWynter

Supernatural

Sam Winchester

Ruby

Lilith

Jo Harvelle

Ellen Harvelle

Ava Wilson

Bela Talbot

Sarah Blake

LOTR’s Shadow Of War

Talion

Shelob

Idril

Adventure Time

Marceline The Vampire Queen

Flame Princess

Ice Queen

Scream TV

Noah Foster

Riley Marra

Brooke Maddox

Piper Shaw

Dishonoured

Corvo Attano

Emily Kaldwin

Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Xander Harris

Buffy Summers

Dawn Summers

Willow Rosenberg

Cordelia Chase

Jenny Calendar

Amy Madison

Drusilla

Faith Lehane

Tara Maclay

Darla

Until Dawn

Chris Hartley

Matt Taylor

Emily Davis

Jessica Riley

Samantha Griddings

Hannah Washington

Beth Washington

Corpse Party

Ayumi Shinozaki

Seiko Shinohara

Naomi Nakashima

Yui Shishido

Date A Live

Kurumi Tokisaki

Tohka Yatogami

Yoshino Himekawa

Gravity Falls

Dipper Pines

Pacifica Northwest

Tambry

Wendy Corduroy

Total Drama Island

Gwen

Lindsay

Heather

Bridgette

Courtney

Chuck

Charles ‘Chuck’ Bartowski

Ellie Bartowski

Sarah Walker

Carina Miller

Lou Palone

Anna Wu

Alex McHugh

Skyrim

Serana

Lydia

Aela

Beautiful Creatures

Ethan Wate

Lena Duchannes

Ridley Duchannes

Olivia ‘Liv’ Durand

Jurassic Park

Alan Grant

Zach Mitchell

Owen Grady

Ellie Sattler

Lex Murphy

Claire Dearing

Zara Young

Telltale’s The Walking Dead

Lee Everett

Javier Garcia

Clementine

Carley

Lily

Violet

Eleanor

Kate

iCarly/Victorious

Freddie Benson

Carly Shay

Sam Puckett

Jade West

Tori Vega

Trina Vega

Cat Valentine

Alice In Borderland

Ryouhei Arisu

Hikari Kuina

Rizuna An

Yuzuha Usagi

Asahi Kujō

Saori Shibuki

Elden Ring/Souls Series

Melina

Ranni

Sellen

The Fire Keeper

Lies Of P

Pinocchio

Sophia

Eugenie

Laxasia

Belle

Red Fox

Youngest Of The Black Rabbit Brotherhood

Mascots

Wendy’s Mascot

Starbucks Girl

Samsung Sam

Miscellaneous

Wednesday Addams (The Addams Family)

Lola Bunny (Looney Tunes)

Nezuko Kamado (Demon Slayer)

Chika Fujiwara (Kaguya-Sama: Love Is War)

Hinata Hyuga (Naruto)

Akeno Himejima (High School DxD)

Rin Tohsaka (Fate/Stay Night)

Hestia (Is It Wrong To Try To Pick Up Girls In A Dungeon)

Jessica Rabbit (Who Framed Roger Rabbit?)

Lara Croft (Tomb Raider)

Samus Aran (Metroid)

Ahsoka Tano (Star Wars)

Juliet Starling (Lollipop Chainsaw)

Morrigan Aensland (Darkstalkers)

Kitty Katswell (Tuff Puppy)

Palutena (Kid Icarus)

Faith Seed (Far Cry 5)

Marge Simpson (The Simpsons)

Lois Griffin (Family Guy)

Vanessa Doofenshmirtz (Phineas & Ferb)

Ciri (The Witcher)

Quiet (Metal Gear Solid)

Loona (Helluva Boss)

Tigress (Kung Fu Panda)

Frankie Foster (Foster’s Home For Imaginary Friends)

Super Sonico (Nitroplus)

Faith Connors (Mirror’s Edge)

Mavis Dracula (Hotel Transylvania)

2B (Nier Automata)

Alice Angel (Bendy And The Ink Machine)

Piper Wright (Fallout 4)

Saeko Busujima (Highschool Of The Dead)

Komi Shouko (Komi Can’t Communicate)

Rem (Re:Zero)

Raphtalia (Rising Of The Shield Hero)

Velvet Crowe (Tales Of Berseria)

Smurfette (The Smurfs)

Lady Love Dies (Paradise Killer)

Tatsumaki (One Punch Man)

#dense's thoughts #muses

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star-girl69 · 4 months

Text

I Did Something Bad

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Demigod!Reader

—-

synopsis: you somehow become the target of a deadly vendetta, and it ends in an overnight stay in the infirmary, a lot of blood, and a lot of your scary girlfriend being her scary self.

a/n: save me clarisse “touch her and die” la rue save me save me save me save me save me save me… this is a completely self indulgent fic and no i will not apologize. love y’all!!!!!

inspired by an ask @nvirskies sent me

I Did Something Bad - Taylor Swift

warnings: not proofread, VERY VIOLENT AND GRAPHIC DESCRIPTIONS OF Y/N GETTING INJURED!!!!! BLOOD!!!!! WOUNDS!!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED, anyways…. DANNNNNYYYYYY MY BABY!!!!! HES BACK!!!!!, ares cabin bonding time <3, FOUND FAMILY, y/n is crazy too, insane power couple who are insane together!!, y’all know what’s going on…… protective clarisse, possessive clarisse, insane clarisse, murderous clarisse, again clarisse gets a bit too into capture the flag, swearing, attempted murder!, LOTS of violence, kissing, clarisse hates talking about her feelings but she will do it for y/n, tell me if i missed anything!!

—-

Clarisse loves capture the flag.

It’s the one place where she really gets to be in her element. That’s where she prefers to be- in the moment, hard and fast, a flurry of swords and adrenaline and the feeling of someone surrendering.

Of course, Clarisse is never the one surrendering. You don’t think you’ve ever seen someone surrender to her.

Clarisse loves capture the flag.

And that love is also shared by her equally violently-minded siblings, which is why you’re sitting on her lap in the middle of the Ares cabin, listening to everyone scream and shout about tactics and plans and things that are just general boring.

Clarisse, of course, listens to everything. Silently humming to herself, drumming her fingers against your stomach, rolling her eyes and scoffing silently at some of her siblings ideas.

They all shout out ideas, but everyone knows that Clarisse has the final say.

You should probably be preparing with your own cabin- but this is just so much fun.

The tension in the room rises significantly after Nelson shuts down another one of Carrie’s ideas. Carrie has a mind made for the strategy of battle, where Nelson is all tough war and pain.

Clarisse likes to brag that she’s the perfect mix of both.

“I’m bored,” you huff, leaning back into your girlfriend. “Can they start punching each other again? Or something entertaining?”

She laughs and wraps her arms around your waist, kissing your shoulder. “You’re so violent,” she mumbles. “I’m supposed to be the violent one.”

“I jus’ think it’s really funny,” you shrug. “Like, can you blame me? It’s objectively funny.”

Danny, your favorite of Clarisse’s siblings, skitters through his older siblings and throws himself onto the couch next to you.

“Did they start fighting yet?” he asks, practically bouncing in his seat.

“No,” you sigh, dramatically.

Clarisse puts her arm around his shoulder, and you know she feels ridiculously proud over the fact that she’s the favorite of the most lovable member of the Ares cabin, and the fact you’re literally draped over her.

Not your fault she’s so comfy.

“Hey, how you feelin’ about tomorrow?” you ask Danny.

His face hardens. “I’m gonna fuck a bitch up.”

“Oh, my Gods,” you mutter, listening to Clarisse chuckle and pat his back.

“Hell yeah,” she smiles.

“Good!” you say after a second, feeling slightly disturbed over the 11 year-old’s colorful language. But, who are you to stop him?

Clarisse sighs after a moment, and you look up to see Carrie and Nelson finally at each other’s throats. Besides for the fact it’s just so funny when the siblings fight, they should get all of the anger out now so they can work as a team tomorrow.

“Well, no, Nelson, we aren’t gonna fucking ‘kill them with kindness,’ because that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Hey, fuckers,” Clarisse says, but they’re too absorbed in the fight to hear her.

You scramble off of her, climbing over Danny, watching in amazement as he opens the bag of pretzels he did not have in his hand a second ago- stuffing one in his mouth and holding it out to you.

These pretzels might have been buried in between the couch cushions. But they’re sealed, so who cares.

“You know what, fuck you, Carrie!” Nelson shouts, pushing her back.

“Askin’ for it,” she laughs, winding up and punching him straight in the face.

You can’t feel bad for the crunch, because Nelson should have know Carrie was gonna punch him- he could have at least put in an effort to stop her. Instead, he just stood there and took it.

“Oh,” Matty winces, sliding next to you. Why the hell are random things just appearing? Did he come out of the cushions too? Probably, seeing as he’s always falling asleep. “Askin’ for it,” he mumbles, shaking his head.

Nelson recovers from the hit and jabs at Carrie- but she stands there, hand on her hip, completely still.

Clarisse catches his arm.

He’s breathing out heavily, and the room goes pretty much silent- except for you, Danny and Matty chomping on pretzels in the corner of the couch.

“You’re fuckin’ embarrassing, Nelson.”

He pulls himself away from her and huffs, heading to the bathroom to deal with his bright red cheek.

Clarisse sighs heavily.

“Gods, can’t have one night without someone punching someone.”

Carrie looks around the room with a smug smile, scoffing when Clarisse shoulders her as she walks past. She lays down in your waiting arms, kissing your hand as you wrap them around her.

“Gettin’ on my nerves,” she mumbles, closing her eyes and leaning into you.

“I know,” you soothe, turning around and making a silly face to Danny at her dramatics.

—-

Nelson is obviously still angry the next day. His helmet doesn’t cover all of the nasty bruise on his cheek, a sickening purple against his tan skin.

Him and Carrie swap glares across the the throngs of red helmets.

“Okay, Carrie, stop,” you huff. “He might actually kill you. You’re the one who got a punch in- let it go.”

She turns to glare at you, now.

“Tell him to stop staring at me.”

“Well, you can help by looking away first.”

“Fine,” she mumbles, putting her helmet on and tightening her grip on her sword. Chiron made his usual speech around 10 minutes ago, and Clarisse has finally finished updating everyone- more like yelling incoherently at everyone- about their positions.

But you have a similar strategy.

The blue team has the brains of the Athena Cabin, but the red team has all the brute strength.

Clarisse huffs, walking over to you and Carrie.

“Okay, ready?” she asks, reaching over to tighten the straps of your armor- even through they’re perfectly fine- by habit.

Carrie let’s out a deep breath. “Yes. Very ready to fuckin’ pummel those blue shits and pretend they’re Nelson.”

“That’s the spirit!” you smile, slapping her shoulder. She rolls her eyes and steps away from you, smiling slightly.

Danny and Matty walk over, and your little band is complete. You hunt in the woods just south of the flag, deterring a lot of hopefuls. The older campers know to come up with sneakier ways to get by, but Clarisse is otherwise confident in those she placed by the flag to really protect it.

You strike out into an offensive stance, pointing the end of your blade straight at Danny- and he quickly counters with his own impeccable stance.

“Oh, yeah, they don’t stand a chance,” you smile, and he returns it.

—-

You take your normal routes through the woods.

With the added weight of you and Danny, the group is not as stealthy as they could be- but Clarisse is a secret teddy bear who doesn’t like to be away from you for long, and Danny is too young to be set loose, left to watch the big kids work, occasionally jumping in for a few swings.

Leaves crunch under your feet in the otherwise silent forest. You’ve already come across a few stragglers, and before you could even raise your sword the Ares siblings had disarmed them. Your heart squeezed seeing the absolutely heartbroken look on Danny’s face- he was promised that this time he could really fight.

And after you pulled Clarisse off to the side and reminded her of her deal- Danny was leading the group, with you and Clarisse behind him.

He marches tall and proud, sword pointed out, even though Clarisse scolds him and says his arm will get tired- he’s young and doesn’t listen to his half-sibling.

You smile, watching him, admiring how carefree he is. The walk continues mostly in a stealthy silence- Clarisse, Carrie and Matty has mastered the art of walking silently- so your cover is lost by you and Danny.

Of course, whenever you try to convince Clarisse that maybe you should go somewhere else- she looks at you like you’ve suddenly turned into a female Minotaur.

Clarisse, her hand in yours right now, has a hard time understanding the concept that she can’t be with you all the time. That you might get hurt, that she can’t always stop it.

It’s sweet how constantly concerned she is over you, it makes your stomach twist so good.

She squeezes your hand, bringing you out of your reverie. Voices.

“Danny,” you whisper, almost silently, kicking the back of his leg. When he turns around, frown on his face, you point towards the direction of the voices- and now footsteps.

You all stop in your tracks.

Danny practically jumps up in down, you smile wide, and Clarisse signals to Carrie and Matty, urging you and Danny closer to the action.

When they come into the clearing, a few Hermes kids dressed in blue bandanas, swords in their hands. They’re all strong, you’ve seen them around- recognize them vaguely as potentials that lost to Clarisse in ugly sparring matches.

The siblings have disappeared into the trees.

So it’s just you, unsuspecting, and Danny.

You can see the triumphant looks on their faces.

Except for one of them.

Nicky, maybe? You don’t care enough about him to know his name. But there’s something more in his eyes that you notice immediately, something similar to the passion Clarisse gets in her eyes at the mention of this game.

Danny jumps forward, sword swinging just the way his blood knows, the way his siblings have taught him meticulously.

They seem momentarily surprised at the force his small body can produce, quickly countering with their own jabs, swords clashing together. The other focuses on you.

You’re not worried, you know the siblings are just letting the two of you have your moments before they really come in and you can sit back and watch Clarisse fight. Muscles rippling, sick smile on her face, spear glowing with electricity.

He comes at you and your swords clash together, the force of it making your teeth ring- Gods, he’s strong. He pulls back and you do the same thing a few more times, neither of you able to get the upper hand- until he finally seems to realize his height advantage.

He swings his sword down on you, pressing down hard- and with gravity on his side you have to put all of your focus into stopping that downward sword.

You don’t see his foot coming out to kick you back.

You only feel it, boot in your chest, wind knocked out of you, groaning as you slam into the ground.

“Fuck,” you breathe, tasting blood in your mouth.

“Y/N!” Danny shouts, and that’s when you see his sword coming down on you again. He does it on purpose, that much is sword, the strategic placing of his sword slicing through the top of your arm.

He doesn’t mean to kill you. He means to hurt you.

His purpose isn’t winning the game, you realize as the blade tears through skin, his purpose is to hurt you. That’s what you saw in his eyes.

Delight that his prey was right in front of him.

The realization washes over you like a wave- but like the real ocean, another one comes- an overwhelming feeling of pain, blooming outward like a flower.

He bites his lip in concentration, standing over you as his blade sinks into the dirt. He smiles wide, hitting his target.

You scream.

It’s a quick stop. The clearing is filled with the sound of your screams, swords stopping in midair- everyone realizing simultaneously that you’re really hurt. That this boy hurt you on purpose.

Something cuts through the air, wind in your ears, swiftly burying itself through Nicky’s armor and into his side.

You’ve realized in the last day that men are stupid. First, it was Nelson not expecting to get punched, and now it was Nicky not prepared for a retaliation after hurting you.

The thick armor slowed down the spear, so it unfortunately stabs his side and falls right out.

He yells in pain, ripping off his armor, revealing a small cut. Nothing compared to yours, but you can faintly recognize the fire in his eyes before Matty is leaning over you and Carrie is wrapping a bandana above the pain in your arm.

You hear the sounds of something happening, someone fighting, skin on skin.

You hear all of this, you see all of it, but all you can feel is the burning, burning cut in your arm. It feels like he cut it off. Your mind is hazy, you know blood is gushing, you never knew something could hurt this bad.

You faintly realize you bit your tongue when you went down. Blood spurts from your mouth when you cough, when you groan in pain, when you say her name like a prayer over and over again.

“Clarisse,” you moan, legs twisting around, trying to get away from the pain that you can’t escape from. “Clarisse, Clarisse, please, Clar…”

Matty pulls your head into his lap.

You can tell it’s bad, you can see the queasy look on his face. You clench your fist- the one you can feel, at least- to keep from screaming, heels digging into the dirt. You’re still trying to get away. But you can’t. You can’t get away from this all consuming pain.

“It’s okay,” Danny whispers, suddenly appearing next to you. He voice shakes, he doesn’t know, he can’t tell you anything reassuring.

“Can you go find someone, Danny? One of the Apollo kids, anyone?”

He ignores Carrie, starring at you for a second longer.

“Y/N,” he mumbles, his voice quiet, finally able to act like the young boy he is.

“You can go,” you breathe, somehow finding the strength to make him believe you’re okay. “Go help me, okay?”

His little footsteps disappear into the woods faster than you’ve ever heard him run, even when they have his favorite brownies for dessert.

You let out a sob.

“D-did he cut it off?” you moan. “It feels like he cut it off, please tell me he didn’t… he didn’t cut my arm off…”

“Oh, fuck, no,” Carrie breathes, pressing down agains the wound to try and stop the blood from gushing out- but it doesn’t really help. It’s just too much. “I mean, it’s deep and it’s nasty, but you’ve still got an arm, don’t worry.”

She laughs, awkwardly, nervously. You can feel even more of your arm drifting away, blood pouring out onto the ground.

“Hey, hey, no,” Matty mutters, lightly hitting your face.

“Wha-”

“Can’t fall asleep, Y/N,” Carrie says, nervously. “Sit up against Matty, come on, huh?” you lean against Matty, head clearing now that there’s fresh air in your system.

Your eyes focus on Clarisse.

Except she’s not anywhere near you, she’s 10 feet away, punching Nicky so hard you’re surprised he’s still standing.

Carrie cringes. “Okay, maybe don’t look at that.”

But you’re sort of entranced by her. She’s not outwardly angry, her face reveals nothing- just a mask of hard, unrelenting focus. It should scare you, how much concentration she puts into her deadly punches, blood flying with each hit she lands. Her knuckles are red, his face is a mess, but it’s exhilarating to know she would do this for you.

A sickening crack rents the air. “My fucking nose, fuck, fuck, screw you, you fucking bitch! Fuck-”

The smallest smile creeps it way onto her face. She wipes her mouth, leaving blood on her lips- but she doesn’t seem to notice.

“I can keep going!” she shouts back, grabbing his shirt. “You wanna do that shit? I’m only getting started. I’m gonna throw you around, then I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you.”

“Wait! Wait, okay, wait, shit,” he breathes, holding his hands up in surrender. Blood pours from his nose, down to her hand bunched in his shirt. He’s taller than her, yet he’s surrendering.

“You’re pathetic,” she hisses, pushing him back. He hits the ground with a groan, trying to grab for a rock, a sword, anything to defend himself against Clarisse and her fury.

Clarisse loves capture the flag.

One of the reasons why she does is because she gets to let out all her anger. She looks at you, but not in your eyes- she looks at the wound on your arm. You can see the red pouring out of the corner of your eye- but you choose to ignore it, instead focusing on the way the fire inside of her gets relit at the sight of your blood. She has plenty reason to be angry now.

She grabs her spear, sauntering over to him, laughing at the way he can’t even try to get up.

“So fuckin’ stupid,” she smiles, tilting her head. Then the tip of her spear is pointing right at his neck, she’s standing over him the way he did to you. “How’s it feel?” she smiles.

He coughs, hissing in pain.

“I’m scared, Clarisse, okay? You got your fucking revenge, but it wasn’t me.”

She laughs, loud and boisterous. “I just saw you cut her, dumbass. I really should kill you, just as a favor to the world.”

“Paid me,” he coughs. “Drachmas, in exchange for hurting your girlfriend-”

She presses the blade against his throat, he yells out.

“Who?”

He stays silent.

“Who?!” she yells, kicking his stomach.

“Nelson!” he screams. “Nelson! Nelson paid me, please, Clarisse-”

She moves the blade away, and he hisses- she probably just barely drew blood.

“I’m not done yet,” she whispers, deadly promise dripping from her words. She turns around, fades out of focus for a second, and then she’s right next to you.

Her hands are cupping your face, she looks sick, seeing you like this up close- but all she does is kiss your forehead. Like you, she doesn’t want to look at your flesh and blood.

“I’m here, I’m here, oh, fuck. Gods, what the fuck,” she mumbles, looking very pointedly away from the wound, finally seeing how bad it is up close.

“Clarisse.”

“I know,” she whispers, smoothing your hair back. “I know, baby, I know, but it’s gonna be okay.”

Danny runs into the clearing, shouting “just over here” while healers follow him, immediately groaning at the smell of blood, the sight of it.

Clarisse switches places with Matty, holding you against her, kissing your head again and again, muttering about how brave you are.

You almost laugh at the odd looks the Apollo kids give her, unused to seeing the big bad Clarisse so soft. But they just don’t know her like you do. She doesn’t love them like she loves you.

One of them starts to clean the blood, and your eyes drift shut as the other starts to mend your skin back together.

—-

You wake up with familiar curly hair in your face.

You spit it out, groaning, mouth feeling fuzzy, everything feelings fuzzy.

“Clarisse?” you mumble, eyes not even open, but you wake up with that hair in your mouth everyday, and you’ve memorized the weight of her arm around your waist.

She sits up immediately, jumping out of bed, standing up and fixing her messy hair like someone’s gonna be there.

“Um, hello? I was speaking, crazy girl.”

“Oh, thank Gods,” she mumbles, blowing hair out of her face and sitting back down. “Thought we got caught.”

You look at her, then your surroundings-

“Oh, holy shit,” she says, staring at you like a deer in headlights. “Wait, you’re awake. You’re awake!”

She throws her arms around you, burying her face into your neck, reverberating with the sound of your laughter.

“You make it sound like I’ve been in a coma for 10 years.” Your heart drops. “Have I… been asleep for a while?”

“Um,” she says, softly, biting her lip as she extricated herself from your neck. “Capture the flag was yesterday, so… no.”

“So you’re just being dramatic?”

“Possibly,” she smiles. “It’s not my fault you’ve taken over my entire brain.” She shows her bruised knuckles, split open, already starting to scab. “I said not to fix ‘em up. They don’t hurt that bad, and they look fucking cool.”

You grab her hands, relieved it’s only been a day, kissing the rough scabs. She blushes, although she tries her best not to, breathing in deeply.

“How are you feeling, baby?”

You look towards your totally healed arm, finally realizing that you know have full control of your hands, unlike yesterday. It’s wrapped in a bandage for precautions, but it feels totally healed.

“All good,” you smile.

“You gotta take it real easy for the next week or so, yeah?” she fusses, brushing hair behind your ear. “So you call me, or one of my siblings, anyone to help you with anything. No lifting heavy stuff, don’t do anything too fast- you might tear the healing.”

“I don’t suppose you’ll carry me around like a princess?” you giggle, laying back, inviting her into your arms. She gets back under the covers, head against your chest so she can hear your heartbeat.

“That’s not a bad idea, actually. Practical. Very safe.”

You hit her shoulder. “I’m joking.”

“Eh, I’ll change your mind.”

You smile, running your hands through her hair, enjoying the early mornings with her warmth against you, soft sunlight peeking through windows.

She sits up after a moment, laying her head back on the pillow, arm back around your waist. She just sits there for a moment, you can feel her admiring you. Clarisse doesn’t look at you. She traces your face with her eyes, imagining it was her hands, her lips, she admires you like she sees a reverence in your eyes that has nothing to do with your godly parent.

“Can you promise me something?” she asks, whispering softly, even though you’re the only two people around.

“What?” you say, staring at the ceiling, feeling like you might fall back asleep.

“Don’t get hurt. Like, ever again, please.”

You smile. “Okay, baby,” you mumble.

“I’m serious,” she smiles, nudging your cheek with her nose. “I… I was really scared. And I don’t like to feel that way, especially when it comes to you. I was angry, too. I was so fuckin’ angry I’m surprised I didn’t kill him. You can’t get hurt like that, not again, you just gotta let me protect you. Or else I might actually kill someone, Y/N.”

“I know,” you mumble. “I watched you.”

“Did I scare you?” she asks, voice soft. There’s no hint of your loving, smiley Clarisse in this bed right now. She’s worried, as if she could ever scare you.

“No,” you say, honestly. “It’s sweet how far you’re willing to go for me.”

“Yeah,” she mumbles. “You better like it. Do you know what I got for that? Eight months no dessert. Five months cleaning the fuckin’ stables.”

You barely hide your laugh. “Oh, my Gods, are you serious?”

“Yes,” she grumbles. “But, I’ve decided it’s fine. You’re my loving girlfriend, right? You can sit there all pretty so I have something to look at when I’m cleaning. And you’ll share your dessert with me, won’t you?”

“Yeah,” you mumble, turning your head. “I will.”

“I really love you. My perfect pretty princess,” she jokes, smiling lopsidedly, and you return it. “You’ll let me protect you, and maybe I can get some decent sleep at night, huh?”

When she presses her hand to your face and her lips to yours, you think nothing could possible ruin this moment. It’s just you and her, and everything that’s beautiful.

“You always protect me, Clar,” you smile.

She smiles, lips grazing yours. This is your Clarisse. The one who smiles just for you, who puts her rough hand softly against your face. This is your Clarisse, the one who would do anything for you, the one who wants to carry you around, the one who wants to protect you and hold you and never let anyone fuck with her baby.

The door slams open, someone is laughing boisterously, another person is groaning in pain, and a familiar voice is shouting your names.

“Clarisse! Y/N! Clarisse, Clarisse! Y/N, Y/N, Y/N!” Danny shouts, dragging out the last syllable of your name. He jumps onto the bed by your feet, even when Clarisse frowns, looking at you like a puppy dog who’s just brought a dead bird to your doorstep.

And as you look at the scene behind you, Nelson being laid on another bed, Carrie being helped into the corner- laughing hysterically, knuckles split open.

Nelson’s face is practically unrecognizable.

You suppose Danny really did bring something unsavory like a dead bird, dropping it right at your feet.

“So, we all woke up right?”

Your eyes whip to Danny, shocked as he know launches into a story about Carrie waking up to Nelson saying he hadn’t been called to the Big House yet, maybe he would get away from it- but swiftly received punishment in the form of Carrie’s fists. With Clarisse in your bed, no one had the guts to stop them, and they fought for what must have been 10 minutes- Nelson very obviously losing.

“And, now we’re here,” Danny sighs, breathing out after his long and embellished rant. “But you’re awake, Y/N!”

He looks at your skeptically- specifically, at your arm.

“Can I hug you?”

“Oh,” you smile, your heart twisting with such a fondness for this wonderful little kid. “Of course you can, Danny,” you smile, opening your arms wide.

“Yes, just be careful,” Clarisse cautions, her arm around your waist. “Watch the arm, huh?”

“He’s just a baby, Clarisse,” you mumble, breath messing his hair.

“He’s 11.”

“Baby,” you reinforce, squeezing him tighter.

“Y/N… you’re crushing me,” he groans.

“Oops,” you say, letting him go. “You’re just too cute,” you coo.

Clarisse scoffs from next to you. You smile, kissing her cheek. “You’re beautiful. Scary, dangerous. Not cute, though.”

She hums. “Yeah, you’re right.”

Carrie walks over, sporting her split knuckles, also opting to let them heal naturally like Clarisse. She shows them off with a wide smile, even as Nelson screams in the background when they reset his nose.

Matty rubs his temples.

You smile, looking around at your very dysfunctional, very awkward, but loving family-adjacent.

“Hey, did we end up winning the game?” you ask.

Clarisse snorts. “Oh, nah. Without us, they were lost. Who cares, though?”

“Yeah, I liked beating Nelson up much more than I would have liked winning,” Carrie smiles.

“Next time,” Danny starts, “Can I lead again?”

Clarisse squints at him. “…Maybe.”

You wink at him, nodding subtly.

“Okay!” he smiles.

Clarisse kisses your forehead.

“I love you, pretty baby,” she mumbles.

You smile. “I love you too, scary baby.”

—-

clarisse when she sees y/n get hurt: oh so the only natural response to to THROW A FUCKING SPEAR AT SOMEONE

appreciation for the fact she threw it from like really far away and just tore through his armor likkkkeeee

nelson and nicky sitting in the infirmary together hugging each other terrified clarisse and carrie are going to come back for more

nicky does not sleep at night anymore SHE SAID SHE WASNT DONE

—-

shout out to my baby danny he carried this fic fr

shoutout to y/n for getting WRECKED so we could have this beautiful moment w clarisse

shoutout to matty for being his beautiful self

shoutout to carrie for being her violent self

and finally shoutout to clarisse for being overprotective and insane

—-

clarisse after she actually convinced y/n to let her carry her around everywhere: 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

bitch is so happy…

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justforbooks · 1 year

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In 2010, Paul O’Grady broke his nose after losing his footing at his friend Cilla Black’s house in Barbados. “My nose was out to here and I had a black eye, but I said: ‘I’m not ruining my holiday,’” he recalled. “So we went out every night and were the talk of the island.” The story was typical of O’Grady, who loved to dramatise his indomitability and had an unquenchable desire to be in the public eye.

The comedian and chat show host, who has died aged 67, was once called “the Edith Piaf of day-time television” and, given its connotations of a drama-filled life, he loved the epithet.

His defiant unshakeability and desire to perform came together in his first stage persona, the foul-mouthed Lily Savage, who sported a platinum blond beehive wig, vast quantities of makeup, white stilettos, a leopard skin miniskirt and a matching fake-fur coat. Born in the 1980s in the gay pubs of south London, as a sideline to O’Grady’s day job as a care worker, Savage thrived on insulting audiences and made no effort to conceal a streak of hard-headed lawlessness (“You need two things in a riot – flat shoes and a pram”).

She also hinted at a lurid past as a down-at-heel sex worker and made the work of previous British female impersonators, such as Danny La Rue and Dick Emery, seem tame.

Savage was inspired, in part, by O’Grady’s Aunt Chrissie, a bus conductor. “She had a hard life, but she used to suck her cheeks in and fancy herself as Marlene Dietrich,” he said.

His alter ego acted as a kind of avenging angel, giving voice to the anger O’Grady was otherwise unable to express.

Savage eventually became a phenomenon, appearing on the BBC, ITV and Channel 4. She presented the BBC celebrity game show Blankety Blank (1997–99) and the ITV comedy show Lily Live! (2000-01). She even returned in triumph to her native Merseyside, and became a regular on This Morning with Richard and Judy.

But O’Grady killed off Savage in 2005, claiming Lily had “seen the light, taken the veil and packed herself off to a convent in France”. Thereafter he took centre stage as himself. As the host of the Paul O’Grady Show and Paul O’Grady Live he could be just as caustic as Savage.

In 2010 he provoked complaints to Ofcom for attacking the new coalition government during Paul O’Grady Live. “Do you know what got my back up?” he told his ITV audience. “Those Tories hooping and hollering when they heard about the cuts. Gonna scrap the pensions – yeah! – no more wheelchairs – yeah! ... I bet when they were children they laughed at Bambi when the mother got shot.”

O’Grady was born in Birkenhead to Catholic parents, an Irish father, Paddy, and English mother, Molly (nee Savage). “I was born late – what my mother calls the last kick of a dying horse,” he said in his 2009 autobiography At My Mother’s Knee … And Other Low Joints.

“There’s three of us children, but I’m 13 or 14 years younger than my brother and sister. When I look back on my childhood I have no bad memories. Our family was loving and full of affection. I never knew what divorce was until I moved to London. I was an indulged child and completely protected from anything bad.” Not quite true: he was sent by his parents to a school run by the Christian Brothers. “They were wicked, wicked,” he told an interviewer.

O’Grady left school at 16 to work for the DHSS (Department of Health and Social Security) in Liverpool, and then went on to a string of jobs – hotel skivvy, office worker at an abattoir, and clerk at a magistrates court.

In the 70s he worked for Camden council in north London as a peripatetic carer. “If a single mother had to go to hospital, I’d move in and look after her kids so they didn’t have to go into care,” he once explained. “Often there’d be a drunken father turning up at 2am, wanting to know who I was, and I’d say, mincing slightly: ‘I’m from Camden council!’ and he’d smack me. So I’d be going around with a black eye and nits from the kids.” He cited this period of his life as part inspiration, along with his Birkenhead female relations, for the Lily Savage character.

In the 80s, Savage had a solo residency at the Royal Vauxhall Tavern in London that ran for eight years. Each night his waspish patter spared no one, not even the boys in blue. One night in 1987, his performance was rudely interrupted by a police raid, one that many of the gay club’s punters took to be a homophobic attempt to intimidate them.

Thirty-five officers burst in wearing rubber gloves – this being the height of the Aids epidemic, they feared touching those they arrested. According to the veteran LGBTQ+ campaigner Peter Tatchell, O’Grady at first thought they were strippers and part of the show.

In 2021, O’Grady described what happened next: “I was doing the late show and within seconds the place was heaving with coppers, all wearing rubber gloves. I remember saying something like, ‘Well well, it looks like we’ve got help with the washing up.’” He was handcuffed and taken to the police station before being released without charge. “They made many arrests but we were a stoic lot and it was business as usual the next night.”

While working as a court clerk, he had an affair with a colleague, Diane Jansen, who became pregnant with their daughter, Sharyn. In 1977 he married Teresa Fernandes, a Portuguese woman, in order to prevent her deportation from the UK. The couple divorced in 2005.

O’Grady claimed there was always an unspoken understanding in his family that he was gay. “It was no big deal. I never stood up in the front room and said, ‘I have something to tell you!’ – but I wasn’t hiding anything.”

During the mid-80s he met Brendan Murphy, the manager of a sauna in south London. They were a couple until Murphy’s death from brain cancer in 2005.

By then O’Grady was a popular household name, and in 2008 he was appointed MBE. Three years later, the Museum of Liverpool staged an exhibition of his alter ego’s frocks. In 2011 he quit Paul O’Grady Live after becoming exasperated with his role as a chat- show host: “I felt part of the PR machine. They’d want this guest or that guest. Every question had to go through the lawyers. I was just another plug for someone’s book.”

He went on to make shows such as ITV’s For the Love of Dogs, Me and My Guide Dog, a documentary about the burlesque performer Gypsy Rose Lee, and a series for the BBC, Paul O’Grady’s Working Britain. A two-part eulogy to the British working class, broadcast in 2013, it prompted press scepticism – not least because O’Grady told viewers he still considered himself working class despite being a millionaire who owned a generous plot of land in Kent.

He lived there with 14 sheep, three dogs, two pigs, hundreds of rescued chickens, ducks, a goat and barn owls. After Murphy’s death he had a long-term relationship with the former ballet dancer Andre Portasio, whom he married in 2017.

Lily Savage returned from her French convent to perform as Widow Twankey in pantomime in Southampton in 2011 and London in 2012. In 2017, O’Grady hosted a Channel 5 reboot of Blind Date; and in 2021 the ITV celebrity game show Paul O’Grady’s Saturday Night Line Up.

During lockdown, he wrote a children’s book, Eddie Albert and the Amazing Animal Gang (2021). Last year he made a special one-off episode of For the Love of Dogs to mark 160 years of Battersea Dogs and Cats Home, for which he was an ambassador. In August 2022, he presented his last show on BBC Radio 2 after 14 years on the airwaves.

Tatchell said of O’Grady: “Paul wasn’t just a brilliant comedian and broadcast personality but a much admired campaigner for LGBT+ equality and animal rights … Paul was planning to lead our forthcoming campaign for the police to apologise for their historic persecution of the LGBT+ community.” His fellow TV presenter Lorraine Kelly said that O’Grady was “the kindest, funniest man … Dogs are the best judge of character and they loved him.”

He is survived by Andre, Sharyn, and two grandchildren, Abel and Halo, and by his brother, Ben, and sister, Sheila.

🔔 Paul James O’Grady, comedian and chat-show host, born 14 June 1955; died 28 March 2023

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