#does this sound mean or pushy or weird i feel like it does

[appleblueberry-pie]

A yandere Gojo below: Sometimes you wonder what this guy has in his head, you don't understand his weird way of wanting to flirt with you and how clumsy he gets when you're around trying to get your attention with really bad jokes (seriously, they're very bad). His presence somehow makes you feel uncomfortable, but you can tolerate it, I mean, you met similar or much worse people, and Satoru belonged to the group. He loves you, he's always told you and shown you, he takes you on dates to expensive places you don't end up going, so you make up a lame excuse when there's only two minutes left until meeting time. He doesn't get angry, but he doesn't understand why you don't love him, and when he saw your eyes light up upon hearing that Nanami had decided to return, maybe that question was finally answered.

You hated distancing yourself from people like him. Satoru was so genuine about his feelings for you and it's something you've always wanted from your dream man. But everything that he does to show it is so...unnerving.

Weird messages where he pushes boundaries and doesn't know when to step back. Gets in your space when you're not comfortable and he can't tell he's being too touchy. Just so bad at reading social cues in general. And is bad at reading your cues. He buys you so much stuff you're endlessly grateful for and takes you on all of these nice dates, but how he talks to you and acts with you is such a big turn off.

So, you distance yourself. You let him make those dates, you let him pick those places, and you decide last minute you don't want to go. And instead of telling him that and have you bother in your safe space at your house....you just leave him to deal with that. You hate being like shit to him, he doesn't deserve it because he really tries for you. But he doesn't know when to stop when you say no, it's so fucking annoying. You really don't like him.

You felt bad switching to Nanami. He has everything Gojo has and has what he doesn't either. Respect for boundaries and all. You sigh.

This was the 5th date you've turned down. No matter. He'll just plan another one with you another time. But it's a little hard to keep your attention on him when you're giving it all to the lousy businessman. Nanami was nothing compared to him.

Fortunately, that makes him easy to get rid of. He's nowhere near as strong as Gojo, isn't fun and flashy, and just overall has the most boring life ever. How could he compare to the strongest?

Gojo doesn't know why you're trying to sneak around with him anyways. There's nothing to be ashamed of, it's not like he feels humiliated or anything. It sounds more like a cry for help by you, if anything, if you're switching to that guy. He's clearly doing something wrong. Is......he too pushy? Do you not like his money? Maybe he needs to lay off with all of the gifts and letting money fly everywhere.

Maybe you like a more responsible man........hm. Maybe you could find that in Nanami, but he'll still kill him for trying to steal you away from him.

It's a little sad that you think hiding your little side piece from the main would stop him from doing what needs to be done. But it doesn't matter. He will be gone before you know it.

[ordowrites]

when you are sad

cw: none, simple fluff and comfort, self indulgent, no pronouns used / gn!reader. slight vent, i'm sorry. established relationships.

characters: diluc, kaeya, wanderer

bad days, weeks, months are simply just bound to happen. that's sometimes how it is, and kaeya is no stranger to such things. he'd mourned the loss of family many times, and has his own, long bouts of depression.

misery loves company and he finds you out at starsnatch cliff, staring up at the endless sky and for a moment, he considers leaving you to yourself, knowing that sometimes being alone is better but he can't help but linger for a brief moment.

finally, kaeya simply elects to sit next to you and gently drapes his arm around you and pulls you close.

"it's gonna be okay." he murmurs as you slump against him. "i promise." it feels like lip service but it's all he can offer when in reality, he would take on all your troubles if it means never seeing that somber, upset look on your face ever again. he holds you closer and you rest your head on his chest. "i love you."

he never says those words out loud to anyone - let alone you, the one who caught his eye so long ago.

"i love you." he repeats, firmly. "i know it can't fix whatever is going on, but just...just remember that."

you are all the things that are right in this world - you are ambitious, outspoken, there is not a moment where you have surrendered simply because the going got tough. yet, seeing you in tears and frustrated has diluc at a loss.

your spirit is like wildfire, it burns everything in its path and here it is, damped and gone, in the wake, ashes.

"what's the matter, my beloved?" diluc is tender when he gently cups your face and wipes away your tears. it doesn't matter if you tell him or not, you'll talk about it when you're ready. "hey, hey, shhh..." he grunts in surprise when you grip him into a tight hug. "it's okay, it's okay, i'm here."

unlike kaeya, diluc isn't very good with words and he doesn't always know how to make things better (and sometimes tends to worsen things) so when you hug him, all he can do is hold you just as tightly.

he has adelinde make you your favorite food - after all, food is a love language - and prepare you a bath that you can soak in. it doesn't fix the problem, but he hopes it can at least provide some sense of comfort.

there's something about your expression that's frustrating him - the wanderer is not unfamiliar with human emotion, in fact, he understands them quite well after four hundred some years but he is perplexed by you. normally, you return his snark ten fold, you're loud, you're obnoxious, and pushy, and when he calls you an ass, you have ten times worse words for him.

"what do you want?" you ask him, tone flat. you're exhausted, he notes as he takes the seat across from you. "go away, i don't have time."

"well, i do." he retorts.

you roll your eyes. "news flash, the world does not revolve around you."

"it should," the wanderer responds, crossing his arms over his chest. "tell me what's wrong."

"i don't want to." you respond.

he snorts. "fine, have it your way." he says, grumpily. "but don't think, for a minute, i'm leaving your depressed ass alone."

"why?" you have the audacity to ask.

the wanderer, for once, does not have a proper answer for you. or a retort. he simply just stares, hopes you drop it and let it go. after awhile, he gets up and goes inside the cafe and orders you some cake and some weird sounding cold coffee. humans and their need to change things.

"a wise deity once told me that sweets can sooth the soul." he says, upon your quizzical look. "i assume she must be right."

for the first time in the two hours, you crack a small smile. and the wanderer feels victorious.

[woulddieforloki]

Ok but in your fic, which parts of Loki attacking people are you referring to? Because Loki canonically doesn’t just attack people for no reason. In Age of Ultron it was Thor who attacked Tony, and it was you who made Loki do it instead, making Loki the one at fault. I don’t mean to say your fic is bad because I like it but it makes sense that fans would defend Loki in that case.

I'm gonna put it under a cut because I don't think my friend's made it that far and I don't want to spoil it if/when he sees this lol

he "attacked" (assaulted?) Jane after The Dark World when Thor wouldn't tell him what they did with the Aether and then he choked Tony because he was mad in AoU. and like Loki did have a reason but he refuses to communicate with anyone so the Avengers don't know that he had a reason. like, it's hard to guess what reason Loki could possibly have for assaulting Thor's girlfriend two minutes after meeting her, y'know? the Avengers aren't the bad guys for thinking Loki shouldn't assault people 😭

[hyukalyptus]

a coincidence — rockstar!yeonjun x fem!reader

cw. rockstar!yeonjun x audiencemember!reader, chubby!reader implied, fem!reader, mentions of alcohol, oral (m. receiving), sex (condoms mentioned <3), roleplaying(?), orgasm denial, lmk if there's more. notes. this is part of @napofamoon's growing pain rock band!au collaboration :D thank you @nightlyawnzz for being a beta reader :3 and thank you angie for that one line of dialogue (didn't know if you wanted to like not be tagged lol), not super well edited, smut under cut <3 wc. 2.8K

Who is that? Yeonjun’s seen hundreds—thousands—of pretty girls at his concerts. But no one’s ever truly made an impression. Every once in a while, there’d be one that barely stuck out from the crowd, but nothing ever stuck. After a while, the crowds started getting blurry. Has performing become a bit boring for him? Maybe. There wasn’t a spark anymore. No reason to perform. 

But you…you immediately caught his eye. A bright star in a sea of dull strangers—smiling, drinking, dancing to the music, having a blast. You looked fun, exciting, flirty. And he wanted—needed—to get to know you. But first, he needed to get your attention. 

He’s cool, casual with his bass; he’s a natural. The way he moves with the music, pouty lips singing under his breath along with the frontman, the stage lights sparkling in his eyes—it didn’t take much focus for him to nail every song. 

So he decided to have a bit of fun tonight. Moving a bit more, putting on a bit more of a show than usual, getting closer to the edge of the stage without being too obvious. All to get your attention. So why won’t you look at him? Just a bit closer and maybe…

Bingo. 

You’ve locked eyes and there’s that something he’s been looking for. Something he’s been looking for for a while. That spark. That reason to put on a bit of a show. 

And you could tell. You were just as into it as he was. 

Watching his every move—flirting without crossing a line, giving him seductive looks, dancing in his direction. It was fun. It was thrilling. That unspoken desire between two strangers—and one of them admires the other before they’ve even met? How scandalous, hm? The tension grew and grew until—

“Thank you everyone; good night!”

But…what do you do now? How could he find you later? Oh, why didn’t he slip the security guard his number to give to you? Where are you? No, no, no, don’t leave. 

There was nothing he could do; the lights were dim, the curtain was drawn, the crowd was spilling out the front door. You never left his mind, though. Not when he put his bass in its case, not when he zipped his hoodie up to leave, not when he plopped down on his hotel bed, never. 

Desperately trying to get you off his mind, he heads down to the hotel bar. Oh, how pathetic is this? A world-famous rock star sitting alone at a hotel’s bar sipping a whiskey feeling sorry for himself? Over what? Some girl? 

Please don’t sit there…he begs silently watching a strange figure take the seat in the bar stool next to him. Despite the need for alone time, he couldn’t help but glance over at the sound of your—

“Just a vodka soda, please.” 

Oh, shit. It’s you. What does he do? Why are his hands so sweaty? When did he turn into such a loser? Getting this worked up over a girl. He needs to get your attention again, but he doesn't want to come off too pushy. You’re here alone too and maybe you wanna keep it that way. 

Fuck it. 

He clears his throat, cooly-maybe-not-so-cooly saying, “I saw you in the audience.” Just as you planned. Well, sort of. You didn’t mean to run into him. Glancing across the room at the hotel you were staying in to see that hot bassist sitting alone at the bar was pure luck. 

But you need to keep it cool. Don’t be too…weird. Just a simple glance and gentle nod is enough. 

“Did you enjoy the show?” He asks, knowing your answer. He could see your desire just as much as you could see his, but you weren’t gonna give in just yet. You nod again, adding a quiet hum. “Are you from around here or…?” Should he move a bit closer? Sure. Should he brush your knee with his fingertips? Why not? Oh, they give you goosebumps. You don’t pull away or even flinch. You’re welcoming this. 

“No, I’m here on business. That’s why I’m, you know, at a hotel right now.”

“Right.” He pauses, like he has to think of the next thing to say, “I’m Yeonjun, by the way. But you already knew that.”

“And what makes you think that?”

“No reason,” he snarks. “Just that you bought a ticket to my show.”

“As if,” you roll your eyes. “I was bored and the show was right down the street.” Lie. All of this was lies. Of course you were a fan. Both of you knew that. 

“So you got front-row seats from a scalper then?”

Now it’s time for some fun. Turning toward him, you introduce yourself, face inching closer and closer, his hand sneaking up higher on your thigh, your heartbeat getting faster with each millimeter. You maintain your confidence best you know how, but you must admit, he’s intimidating. Is it that way he unapologetically stares at your body? The way he’s flirting with a fan after a show? The way his lips look like they’d perfectly wrap around your—

“Do you always find fans to flirt with after the show?” 

“No. Never,” he chuckles, shaking his head. “But you’re so…” he tucks some fallen hair behind your ear, eyes roaming your face, “gorgeous. I haven’t stopped thinking about you in the audience. Then boom, here you are at my hotel’s bar. Must be fate.”

“Or a coincidence.” 

Both resorting to a shrug, there’s tension in the air like you’ve never felt. It’s excruciating. He’s leaning closer to you, oh, what was he about to say?

“I saw you watching me,” he whispers right against your ear—close enough to feel his breath. Fuck, he’s good. This is gonna be fun. And you’re gonna be a brat. At least for a little. 

“I was watching all five of you,” you say, adding an annoying eye roll for good measure. 

“Nope,” he says, sitting back and smiling like he knows a secret of yours. Which he may. “Only me.” 

“So what if I was?” You narrow your eyes at him. You weren’t gonna break eye contact now. You can’t. But he doesn’t expect you to keep it. He expects you to cower and blush like everyone always does. But you don’t. And he likes that. “I’m waiting.”

“Makes me wonder what else you wanna watch me do is all.”

“Like what?” 

“I dunno,” he chuckles. “You tell me. You were the one that couldn’t stop staring at me.”

That jerk. That stupid fucking jerk. Looking at him with heavy-lidded eyes, you glance down at his lips—side note: jesus fucking christ they look delicious but that’s beside the point right now—and lean in as close as you can without touching him. Parting his own lips, he tilts his head just barely and closes his eyes. 

“Aw, you’re so cute.” You giggle. “You thought I was gonna kiss you?”

While you’re watching him retreat, defeated at his own game, he runs his fingers through his messy black hair. 

“So you think I’m cute?” 

Let’s give in now. “No.” You stand, taking a deep breath and walk behind him, sliding your hands down his chest, bending to meet his ear to whisper, “I think you’re fucking sexy.” 

Goosebumps—but this time, they’re on him. Has anyone ever done this to him before? Let’s take it one step further. You bite his ear lobe gently and he sighs, your name falling out of his lips breathlessly. 

“Hm?”

“Come upstairs with me,” he whispers. 

Another step further. Sliding your hand up the back of his neck, you grip some of his hair, tugging it harshly, his eyes widening as he hisses. 

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

“Will you come upstairs with me? Please.”

Turning him around in his barstool, you stand between his legs, his eyes roaming up and down your body. “I thought you’d never ask.” 

It was all a blur as he took you upstairs—heading straight for the elevator, pushing you against the wall to finally crash his lips into yours, hands roaming your body trying to decide what part of it to grab onto. The ding of the elevator snaps you out of it before stumbling down the hallway to his room. 

When he finally gets the door open and the door slams behind you, he’s gentler, like he wants to take his time with you. But you don’t. You drag him toward the bed and push him to the mattress to straddle his hips. Wrapping his hands around your waist, his hands slip under the skirt of your dress to squeeze and squeeze and squeeze. 

Lifting off him, you lift your dress over your head as he eyes your pretty white lace lingerie while he smirks to himself. Fuck, he looks hot when he bites his lip like that. And, god, you need his shirt off. Tugging at it, you rock your hips back and forth to shimmy it off while he stays laying down. Hands on bodies, breath heavy, lips on each other’s…god, this was fun. 

He flips you to your back, pressing his lips to your chest, trailing kisses over your collarbone. Pushing your face to the side to access your neck, he covers it in sloppy, wet kisses. 

Since when was your bra so uncomfortable? And since when was it such a cock blocker? With that out of the way, his lips find your nipples, sucking harshly, but licking them to soothe the stings. Tugging at the waistband of his joggers, you can’t stop begging him to fuck you. 

“Don’t tell me what to do,” he says, mimicking your tone from earlier.

“Please, Yeonjun—” you gasp at the feeling of his finger gliding over your clit slowly—slower than anyone’s ever touched you before. But it’s amazing. “Will you please fuck me?” 

“Not yet,” he whispers. Standing to pull his pants and boxers down in one motion, he looks over your body. Oh, what was he gonna do with you and everything your body has to offer? Put you on your knees so he can cum all over your full tits? Fuck you from behind so he can see your ass jiggle? Fuck you in missionary so he can see your tits and tummy jiggle while he squeezes your thighs? There’s too many options to pick from.

But before he can make the decision, you crawl over to the foot of the bed, making a big show of it before reaching for his hips. Wrapping your hands around his hips to squeeze his ass, you pull him closer, kissing the tip of his cock. You were going to be the death of him. But you haven’t even tasted him yet. Glancing up at him through your eyelashes, you finally sink down on him completely. 

And fuck do you feel good. 

Fingers fumbling through your hair as he tries to steady himself, his head falls back to let out the most beautiful moan you’ve ever heard from a man. He whispers your name. 

“What?” You look at him, your lips forming a pout while you wait for an answer. He responds with a simple eyebrow raise. “You said my name,” you say matter-of-factly. “What is it?”

“Don’t tease me.”

“What are you gonna do about it?” 

Hooking his hands behind your knees, he pulls to flip you on your back while you let out a yelp. He boxes you in with his elbows, dragging his teeth over one of your nipples while you grip his hair, back arching to meet his mouth. He covers you in kisses. You don’t think anyone’s ever kissed you this much. Nothing will ever be enough after this. 

As he makes his way down, your legs fall over his shoulders, showering your thick thighs with kisses. Using his mouth to put the smallest amount of pressure on your clit over your thong, he makes you whine and involuntarily grind against his chin, trying to relieve any tension. But he’s not giving in either. Backing away, he chuckles at you. That jerk. Why does he have to be such a jerk?

“Don’t do that to me,” you say. Eyes dark, he takes the waistband of your thong between his teeth, pulling them down slowly, letting them drag over your skin. Kneeling between your thighs, he keeps that spine-tingling eye contact as he rubs his tip over your center. That sends a jolt through your body, letting your brain finally catch up with your body. 

“Will you wear a condom?”

Nodding, he quickly rustles through his suitcase messily splayed across the floor. Ripping the condom open with his teeth, he starts to roll it down himself, which is a glorious sight. And he can tell the effect it has on you. You smirk, glancing up at his eyes—eyes that are sparkling back at you. 

“Eyes on my cock, baby.”

Fine by you. Sliding it down so slowly, you’re entranced. He knows exactly what he’s doing. 

One hand pressing on your hip, the other lining himself up with your pussy, he pushes himself inside you, your eyes rolling back and he groans in your ear. Short shallow breaths grace your skin as he thrusts fast and hard, just like you wanted. 

Bodies rocking together, he stares at your tits bouncing with his movements. Your nails start dragging down his back, but he quickly pulls out to turn you over, lifting you by your hips to bring you on all fours, your ass on full display. He spanks you, hard enough that your cheek will be pink tomorrow morning. 

Pressing on your lower back to deepen the arch, he thrusts into you again. With your face squished against the mattress, his hands dig into the fat of your hips to hold you in place. The fire in your stomach roars, legs trembling, muscles weak. He yanks you up by your hair—you were hoping he’d do that—to press your back to his chest, letting you feel how heavy he's breathing. 

“Don’t cum yet,” he says.

“Who said I was close?”

That evil laugh makes your eyes roll. “I can feel it.” Well, you can’t really argue with that. He was right. “Don’t.”

“You really like telling me what to do, huh?”

He snakes his hand in front of you to circle your clit, turning your whines to whimpers, desperately fighting the urge to let yourself go. What would happen if you did let yourself cum, though? It might be exciting to find out, hm? But being told what to do and when is just as exciting.

Grabbing his arm, your nails dig into his skin. He releases your hair, pushing you to the mattress roughly, face pressed against the mattress. Fists full of bed sheets, his hands spread across your ass, skin spilling through his fingers. 

It’s getting increasingly difficult to hold it together—the only thing letting you is knowing how good you must be making him feel if he’s making noises like that. 

“Yeonjun,” you gasp, his speed increasing. “Please.” The way he grunts tells you he’s close too, but he doesn’t plan on holding back. Pull my hair again, pull my hair again, pull my hair again, you keep thinking to yourself. And, oh, did you say that out loud? Because he pulls your hair again, finding an even deeper spot inside if you, the feeling spreading to your toes. 

“Please, Yeonjun—” you yelp. “Please let me cum.”

He groans again, your name falling out of his lips before adding, “Cum for me.”

Your loud whimpers are muffled by the pillow you’ve shoved your face into, the fire in your stomach roaring louder and louder until—

Fuck…

God, this is good. Your orgasm explodes inside you, fireworks going off in all directions, filling every nook and cranny of your body. Praising you through your orgasm, he encourages you to cum hard around him, reminding you of how good your pussy feels around his cock. 

Your body relaxes, but his doesn’t. He thrusts deeper inside of you, desperate to reach his own climax.

“Fuck—” he grunts, spanking you again. He loves seeing you jiggle like that. Reaching in front of you, he massages your tits, squeezing to get a firm grip. 

His breath hitches, his thrusts getting sloppy as he twitches inside you, groaning through his climax.

Collapsing on top of you, he catches his breath, chest rushing and falling against your back. Rolling off you to plop onto the mattress, he turns to look at your face while there’s a stillness in the air. 

“...so you’re a fan now?” 

“Haven’t I always been?”

Chuckling, his face turns to the ceiling, running his fingers through his hair, resting his arms above his head. As you make eye contact, both of you burst out laughing—

“I didn’t think you’d like the roleplaying thing as much as you did,” you giggle.

“Well, what can I say? It was hot,” he says. “Great idea, baby.” Tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear, he smiles at you, kissing your forehead. “I love bringing you on tour with us.”

“I love it too.”

[obae-me]

Yes! Finally someone said it!

At first when I saw the interaction I went- hey he's being such a jerk- Ohhhhh wait! This is literally him wanting us to stay soo fricking bad, but Mr.Pridey McPridepants just can't admit it. OFC HE WOULD TRY TO IMPRESS US (even if this emotionally constipated man can't differ b/w chivalry and being an asshole). He's trying to so bloody hard to sweet talk his way into us staying. Even if he's being forceful and manipulative; it's because he's so shit scared of giving us the choice and then us choosing to go cuz he KNOWS wherever we going must mean a lot to us especially when we are going such great lengths to return.

Not to say, that this behavior is ok or good but at the end of the day isn't obey me about flawed and morally grey characters? Even the ANGELS aren't perfect and morally sound, and if I dare say, sometimes they make decisions even crueler than the demons. We are literally talking about the AVATAR OF PRIDE HERE! XD

Literally as soon as you look past the image that he literally puts up cuz he wants ppl to see him that way, you will realize that he really is just a soggy, pathetic man who can't put aside his pride to ask us to stay like a normal person XD Also to point out a lot of ppl LIKE Levi and Mammon BECAUSE OF their pathos lol.

I have always seen that there is SUCH a double standard when it comes to him. Ppl say that he's being too fake and only cares about his image and not his brothers, but when he does show his softer side, they say he's not being genuine or he's pushy or something of the sort. What most ppl fail to see is that he loves his brothers and mc, probably even more than his own life but he's just so bad at showing it because he is held back by his own trauma and sin. While that does not make him innocent... that does make him like his brothers. He acts this way because thats literally the only way he knows how to keep things in his control and keep his family safe and ppl fall for it ... LIKE IT'S NOT THE REAL HIM! TvT

I have this theory (might be a hot take idk?) that most of the ppl playing obey me are pretty young, so they don't like Lucifer because they are anti-authority (I also am, its not a bad thing) but this man is anything but Authority and Power. I might be a lucifer apologist lol but all I am saying is for ppl to look at him with the same open-minded lens they see the other brothers with and you might find him a lot more bearable and dare I say... likeable?

Phew, sorry for rambling in your inbox but I have some strong feelings for that stupid old man XD Also, this feels a lot similar to how expectations are so high and rigid for the eldest sibling whereas these same expectations become a lot less severe for the other siblings...

Firstly, thank you for calling him a soggy pathetic man, that gave me a good chuckle.

And YES! All of this, 100% yes. He doesn't want to admit that there are other things out there more important than him. Not just because of his Pride, but because he finally let someone else behind the walls he put up around his heart (we saw this around Nightbringer lessons 11 and 12, when he was ready to be THE enemy to protect his family, only to end up admitting to himself that he cared about MC just as much) and now, after all that, MC is determined to leave. I'm sure somewhere in his mind, he feels like he's failed.

He's puffing up his feathers as big as he can and screaming "look at me, look at me, look at me"! The big peacock man is flailing.

He's afraid. He's hurt. And so now these weird (and problematic) safety mechanisms are being put in place to protect himself.

Things in his mind are SO 'not fine' that now he's parading around trying to convince everyone (including himself) that everything is perfectly fine! Everything is perfect, everything is great, the outfits he chose are pristine, the food he settled on is text-book. It feels like he's following some sort of guide, like even the things he's saying have been pulled from a novel somewhere. It's not quite the way he normally speaks. If everything can play out the way he sees it in his head, there won't be room for error. Right?

And this isn't new behavior either. It was the ENTIRE plot of season 1 in Shall We Date. Lucifer locked Belphie away because he was worried of what might happen to his sibling. But in a way, 'protecting' his brother was mostly protecting himself.

He's worked so hard to create what he has, that he can't stand the idea of losing it all.

There's also a whole spiel I could go into about how everyone in the family fills a certain "group" role that keeps everything balanced and running smoothly (as smooth as it can get for them). For example, Mammon is the energy of the group, the drive. Beel is the motivator, the encourager. Asmo is the dreamer, etc. Lucifer has to be the guider, the manager, the authoritarian.

While, yes on multiple occasions, he's dismissed his brother's wild antics outright, there have been so many other instances where his brothers say "I want ___" and he gives them the advice or the structure they need to accomplish it successfully. OR even ending up providing it himself should his brother's wishes be genuine (Mammon's car for example).

When he's more on his own, he can drop that uptightness completely. As we see again in Shall We Date, when they're taken to the video game world, and when he doesn't have the worries and responsibilities placed onto his shoulders, he's capable of skipping classes to take a nap on the roof. And fully enjoys it, with a smile on his face and everything.

At the very root of him, while he needs to fulfill the controlling dynamic, he does not want to. At least not completely.

I've always known this, but Nightbringer actually gave me a big confirmation boost! In Wanders Whereabouts, Barbatos gives Lucifer a video call in which he tells Lucifer about all the recent trouble the brothers have gotten themselves into. Barbatos then proceeds to let Lucifer know that as their guardian, the eldest needs to essentially work harder to keep them in line. Then Barbatos sends the damages bill to him.

If he isn't constantly keeping his siblings in line, he takes most of the blame!

And thirdly, I think you are correct, yes. I think especially with the addition of Nightbringer and the anime, a good portion of the fandom is a younger demographic, which doesn't surprise me (listen I played Mystic Messenger when I was a preteen/teen, I was there when the dark texts were written). And a lot of what appeals to that demographic is the coming-of-age, rebelling against conformity sort of story.

And, I want to repeat, my initial post that you are referring to wasn't meant to come off as a "oh everyone is so stupid thinking Lucifer is this way, you should all love him" but more of trying to explain the fullness of his character since it can be harder to spot.

Like, people in the fandom almost always completely understand Mammon. He's not just, "tough and grumbly man who steals things". He's someone who struggles with admitting his own feelings, someone who lets his ambitions blind him from the troubles they can cause, and someone who at the end of the day, loves his family more than anything. And most everyone in the fandom fully understands this.

And yet, with Lucifer, a lot of people tend to take him exactly at face value.

There's a lot of things I could explain about him needing to play a "Parental Guardian Figure" while also just being their brother at the same time, and in a lot of media where the older sibling is forced to become a guardian, they get a lot of flack for not doing it correctly.

Anyways, I could ramble on and on and on about Lucifer as a character, but I think this a good chunk of condensed thoughts. And thank you for sending this over, I always love a good Inbox ramble! Especially about my favorite grumpy, sleep-deprived man <3

[palaceofpassion]

So, in householdarc, how does Jessica the leader react to this tall, cute blonde guy starting to live with them? What does she says to the rest of her team when they ask her about it?

"I'm not telling them anything." She took a few deep breaths. "May and Pyrrha are nice... but I just... I can't talk to them. Pyrrha is good at... being a star, and May is just as much of a wreck as I am."

She pauses and growls, "I wish either Pyrrha or WEiss could have been leader... I don't even like Weiss, but she would have been better." She grumbled a little, feeling the weight of the pressure on her shoulders. She couldn't do this, she couldn't deal with people, why was she made leader?

"Cause you're the most level headed."

She blinked, tilting her head up to see Jaune. Her eyes opened wide, "IOh! You... you didn't hear that right?" She didn't... need someone else thinking she was weird.

"I uhm, I did, sorry."

"Another screw up, I can't even keep a secret from you." She took a moment, "What do you mean level headed? Pyrrha is super level headed! she's also really strong, and then there is WEiss, whose really pushy but she says she knows what she's doing!"

Jaune shrugged, "I uhm, I don't know much about that stuff, but as someone with seven sisters, you kind have to know how to corral things, and well... I think Pyrrha would let Weiss tell her what to do all the time." He didn't have a good read on them, but Pyrrha seemed content with going with the flow... he wasn't sure why. And he didn't want to bother her with that.

"And you... you're the only one who opposes Weiss... she's kind of pushy?" He diidn't want to sound rude, and he was sure had this been another life, and had she flirted with him. He would have TOTALLY been hooked on her, she was gorgeous after all, they all were. "I know it's scary... though I don't know how you feel, I can't, I'm not you. But... but you've been doing a good job. And I know you're trying." He wasn't really good at this, but he'd seen Jess actively try to get along with WEiss, even though they didn't like onea nother. He'd seen her try to accommodate the others, despite how scared she appeared in a crowd. When he saw her on stage, she was a wreck, when he saw her talking with others, she tried to stay quiet, but seemed anxious.

It was different than Pyrrha who was trying to simply smile. Or May who shriveled away. "I think you got this, and well, I know my word isn't worth much. But I believe in you." She looked at him, and then smiled... this felt, "Thanks Jaune." Nice. SHe hadn't had an actual conversation with someone.

"I know things are scary, but you are a team and... well I'm here if you need to talk. I'm a good listener!"

When he put his arms up as a triumphant praise, she giggled. "I like that." So yeah, maybe she could have a friend.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 38 part one

(Masterpost) (Pinboard)  (whole thing on AO3)  

Warning! Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!  

OK But Why?

This tale-within-a-tale is excruciating, yeah? So let's start off by considering why it even exists. Yi City feels like, if not a fully separate story, a pretty complete arc that can play as its own little movie. And it's incredibly sad, in every direction. While it may have begun life, in its originally-written form, as a different story exploring some of the same themes, MXTX placed it in the novel deliberately, and the producers of CQL included it deliberately. Why? Other than the, you know, catharsis of a well-wrought tragedy?

I think the answer is that it tells a set of parallel stories, alternate versions of the stories our main characters inhabit, with different outcomes driven by the character's choices. There's an obvious parallel between Lan Wangji's grief and Song Lan's, and another clear one between Wei Wuxian's core donation and Xiao Xingchen's eyeball donation. 

And there's an important comparison to be made between Xue Yang and Wei Wuxian, two demonic cultivators. They share some formative experiences, but have followed radically different paths, shaped, at a key moment, by another person's choice. 

Overall, the Yi City story illustrates how choices made in a moment affect not just an individual life, but ripple outward into other lives. So be prepared for me to point out parallels even more than usual, as we go through these episodes.

Empathy

We start off learning about Empathy and how it’s sooper dangerous, which means of course Wei Wuxian is totally down for it and probably invented it.  He gathers the kids around and assigns Jin Ling to be the person in charge of supervising and deciding when to pull him out of the matrix link. 

Jin Ling is surprised and reluctant so teacher’s pet Sizhui jumps forward and volunteers. 

Wei Wuxian asks Jin Ling for his Jiang clarity bell, which is on a tassel that used to be Jiang Yanli’s. 

(more behind the cut!)

Once the bell/tassel is out of Jin Ling’s hand, however, he changes his mind and snatches it, and the responsibility, back. 

It seems like Sizhui might recognize this tassel? 

It’s like the one Jiang Yanli gave Wei Wuxian when they met up before her wedding, which means Wei Wuxian would have had it with him during their year in the burial mounds. 

Jingyi disapproves of Jin Ling’s mind-changing, which is a little unfair since JL didn’t actually say “no” prior to Sizhui putting in his oar. (Sizhui is entirely loveable, but he is also a pushy brown-noser just like Lan Wangji was at his age. He just does it so sweetly that nobody minds.)

Sizhui, also like his Lan dad, has made it his life’s mission to manage a loudmouth hothead’s temper for him. 

Heading into empathy with A-Qing, we get flashes of bits of the story that we're about to see in depth. Then we jump to "ten years ago" which, given the way this series does math, probably means seven years ago.

Side note: A-Qing has managed to keep her hair looking pretty cute despite being 90% dead. 

Splish Splash

This particular section of the Wuxia River of Sadness is reserved for people who are contemplating the total mess they have made of their lives (gifset here), but A-Qing didn't get that memo, so she's having a nice time splashing joyfully without a care in the world.

A-Qing isn't about drama or being depressed, even when things are pretty difficult. She has found a big rock to sit on and is having a nice day hanging out on it.  

Then she goes skipping along singing "la la la la" (which is the same sound in Chinese as we make in English when we're singing and don't know the words, incidentally). Ok, show, we get it, she's happy and carefree. I sure hope she doesn't get involved in any weird relationships.

Grifting

She sees a couple of women walking on the path and she starts pretending to be blind. In the book, this pretense was facilitated by her having completely white eyes, but in the show she has normal brown eyes, until she actually is blinded by Xue Yang. So her entire pretense of being blind is to unfocus her eyes a bit and wave her hands around...

...with frequent intervals where she thinks no-one is watching her, and she acts 100% like she can see. Somehow she is almost never busted for this. 

The ladies give her a steamed bun and whisper loudly to each other about how pitiful she is. 

Then she heads into town for a little grifting, picking a wealthy douchebag as a mark. She bumps into him and steals his money bag, which he doesn't notice because he's too busy creeping on her. 

She's annoyed and disappointed that he doesn't have a lot of money.

Hey Pretty, Don’t You Want To Take a Ride With Me

Next she bumps into (and robs) Xiao Xingchen, who is actually blind, so he doesn’t notice her noticing how extremely pretty he is. 

He does notice that she has robbed him, however. 

Did you know if you have your eyes removed or even just damaged so you can't see any more, your eye sockets and/or tear ducts will bleed pretty much forever? Yeah, me neither. 

Xiao Xingchen immediately takes charge of A-Qing, telling her to walk more slowly and then telling her - kindly - to return his money purse. Before she can answer him, the rich douchebag comes back to yell at her and try to hit her. Xiao Xingchen stops him and smooths over the situation, and then lectures Ah Qing about stealing and how it's bad. But he tells her to keep his money, so - mixed messages, bro. 

She calls him gege and says that since he's blind and she's blind, she's going to follow him forever. He’s like, okey dokey, and they walk off together. Is she really the first person (since Song Lan) who’s had this idea about him? He is *very* pretty, after all.

It's unclear to me if she's calling him gege in the sense of “orphan girl who wants a family,” or in the sense of “mostly-grown-up woman who would like to Hit That.” Xiao Xingchen appears to take it as the former; he is too gay virtuous for the other option.

Two seconds after they decide to stay together, they encounter Xue Yang lying injured by the side of the road. A-Qing pretends she didn’t see him, and almost successfully wangles a piggyback ride out of Xiao Xingchen. 

But then he hears Xue Yang and immediately decides to rescue him, like the do-gooder Xue Yang despises him for being.

Xue Yang gets the romance-tropey piggyback ride that A-Qing was hoping for. Girl, the time to stop trying to seduce your gay male friend is 5 minutes before you started, ok?  

So...why was Xue Yang lying by the side of the road with a stab wound? Who gave it to him? If Jin Guangyao was sick of him, he would have stabbed him 100% fatally, and he wouldn't have let him hang on to Tiger Seal 2.0. And presumably Xue Yang wouldn’t think of him as a friend any more. It’s a mystery.

The new throuple decide to go to the creepiest abandoned walled city that has ever existed, and head past all the regular houses to set up camp in the morgue, for some reason. Not even inside one of the buildings; just out in the courtyard with a bunch of possibly-occupied coffins. Xiao Xingchen is so fucking weird. 

Each Unhappy Family is Unhappy in its Own Way

Xiao Xingchen gets to work patching Xue Yang up, and Xue Yang wakes up and recognizes him. A-Qing explains that they are blind and tells him not to be rude about it.

Xue Yang takes a second to process the situation, and then decided he’s going to hide his identity and make nice with Xiao Xingchen. Proving that found family can also have hideous toxic dynamics.

Xue Yang is very careful to keep XXC from touching his hand, since that would give away his identity. He has a...prosthetic finger? He wears a black glove and keeps his pinky finger straight so we know it's a replacement, or injured, or something. 

I think this is a concession to Wang Haoxuan having ten functional fingers and the show having a limited CGI budget. In a real sword-based society, missing a finger is probably not particularly uncommon, and he would probably just rock the nine-fingered look without having a special glove.

At this point, the complex interactions of the trio get rolling. Xiao Xingchen is honestly kind, Xue Yang is fake-kind, A-Qing is fake-unaware with Xue Yang and is unable to make Xiao Xingchen understand the problem, and Xiao Xingchen is genuinely unaware of everything. 

We spend a fairly large amount of time with Xue Yang and Xiao Xingchen playing happy families. As part of his false persona, Xue Yang adopts a coy and whiny tone when talking to his pet white-clad cultivator, remarkably like another demonic cultivator we know.

I’m pretty sure Wei Wuxian has never managed to cop a feel while his sweetie climbs up a ladder, however. 

Then again, neither Lan Wangji nor Wei Wuxian has ever needed a ladder to get onto a roof, so maybe it’s just a lack of opportunity. 

This relationship, on the surface, is cute and sweet, which just makes the reality of it more disturbing. It’s super uncomfortable to watch, but there’s more than manipulation happening in these interactions. As Xue Yang flits around doing domestic tasks like patching the roof of the crappy outdoor shelter that they absolutely do not need to be using, he tells Xiao Xingchen various true things about his early life, and we begin to see what shaped him. 

Xue Yang (like OP) is obsessed with candy. In Xue Yang’s case, he was a hungry street kid who loved candy but couldn’t usually have it because of poverty. We learn that he has skills in patching up inadequate housing because he did it growing up. 

And we learn that he was beaten a lot. 

So he and Wei Wuxian have these things in common - except now Wei Wuxian gets his sugar from alcohol, not from candy. And Wei Wuxian’s handyman skills are used to make a home for his former enemies in the burial grounds, while Xue Yang’s are used - also in a cemetery, of sorts - to manipulate and trap his enemy. 

I Want Candy

In classic predator form, Xue Yang uses candy to lure A-Qing into coming within stabbing range, because he thinks she’s faking her blindness and wants to test her.  

I find him super attractive right here in spite of his evilness. I’m pretty sure it’s because he’s offering candy. (OP goes and gets a jolly rancher out of her purse). 

After calling her over, he draws his sword with a super-loud "sshshk" noise that she inexplicably doesn't notice, and she bravely walks up to, and nearly on to, the point of the sword. 

This shocks him and convinces him that she's really blind. He sits her down with apparently sincere gentleness, and gives her candy, while quizzing her about her hot gege.

A-Qing tries to warn Xiao Xingchen about Xue Yang being a bad guy, pointing out that he's a cultivator and won't tell them his name. (She can’t say “also he tried to stab me” because she’d have to come clean about being able to see.) Xiao Xingchen, because he is a condescending prick--albeit a very sweet one--pats her on the fucking head and laughs off her extremely useful warning. 

Xiao Xingchen came out into the wider world with a set of ideals that he lives by, apparently without examining them. He’s humble, kind, frugal, and wants to eradicate evil. He also believes that the majority of people are good like him, and that detecting evil is simple--as simple as following his sword toward it. He doesn’t allow A-Qing, who is experienced in the wider world, to teach him anything, preferring to keep his ideals untarnished.

Contrast this with Lan Wangji, who also starts his journey into the wider world with a set of ideals (codified as rules), but does not make the mistake of assuming that other people shares his beliefs. Once he’s away from the Cloud Recesses, he follows Wei Wuxian’s lead when dealing with new people, rather than insisting on doing things the way he did back home. In general, he is open to having his beliefs challenged, even when it makes him upset or uncomfortable. As a result, he grows into a righteous man, not a naïve one, and he’s fully capable of identifying enemies even when they appear to be friends.

Bonus: 

In this brief long-distance shot we learn that A-Qing sleeps in a coffin, which is some next level goth girl shit. 

Soundtrack: 1. Hey Pretty by Poe 2. I Want Candy by Bow Wow Wow 3. Cheap Thrills by Sia

[pattypanini]

Lay All Your Love On Me

Chapter 7- Girls Night Out

Jake Kiszka x Reader and Josh Kiszka x Reader

Word Count: 4.5k

TAGLIST

AN: Hi everyone! Here is the seventh chapter of Lay All Your Love On Me from me and @mar-rein12! Although this chapter does not have anyone going to pound town, we wanted to have a chapter where you could get a little lore on y/n and her friends.

Warnings: 18+, Alcohol (like an insane amount do NOT do this), sexting, nudes, cursing, angst. (Not very exciting stuff but your not ready for chapter 8 and 9 so take this chapter as a breathe of fresh air.)

Y/n’s POV

It’s been a little over a week since that night with Jake. After receiving that late-night text from Josh, things have gotten better between you two, but the guilt was still eating away at you. Josh has been friendly, but not as sexual with you. Sure, you’ve wanted to go over a few times and he's teased at it but nothing ever came of it. You missed your time with him. To make matters worse, you haven’t heard from Jake since that fateful night. You didn’t really know where you stood with either of them. You were confused by your own feelings. 

There you stood on the stage, right beside Josh, preparing to run ‘the wedding scene’. Your stage mom begins to walk you down ‘the aisle’ when the music begins to play, Josh standing at the altar. As the priest begins to speak, Donna interrupts him making the announcement about Sophie’s father. 

Your dialogue continues with your mother, “ I don’t care if you slept with hundreds of men. You’re my mom and I love you so much.” You give her a warm embrace. 

“I haven't slept with hundreds of men,” she chuckles along with you. Sam, one of your potential dads, walks up to the front and begins the tense conversation. As all your possible dads, come join you at the altar to support you in your marriage, for you to call off the wedding.

“Sky, let's just not get married yet. You never wanted this anyway. I know that. Let's just get off this island and just see the world!” You project in your animated acting voice. “Okay? Alright?” 

Josh pulls you in for a kiss and a hug. “I love you.” You know it was just acting, but you genuinely felt cared for in that moment. Josh scoops you up, bridal style, and carries you off stage. 

When you make it backstage, Josh gently puts you down, accidentally swiping his hand across your ass. You know it doesn’t mean anything, but you couldn’t help feeling a little spark. You take a deep breath, innocently resting your head on his shoulder. His left arm snakes around your body, gripping at your waist to pull you into his side. His mouth leans down towards your ear, lightly whispering “You did so well. This is gonna be a really good show.” 

“It really is.” There’s a moment of silence before you decide to bring something up that you have been thinking about for a little bit now. “We've gone through some real character development with each other. We went from enemies, to fucking, and now we’re really good friends. I would say that's pretty good.” 

“I wouldn’t say we were enemies.”

“I would, you hated me. But it doesn't matter because we're here now better than ever.” You stand there whispering a little closer. “But I do miss our times together. I think about it sometimes…”

“No one ever said they had to stop, you just never came over.” He places a little kiss on the top of your head. Giving you butterflies.

He was right, you haven't been over since your night with Jake, you felt weird going over. It felt wrong. But you’d be lying if you said you haven’t wanted to, maybe you should.

“Okay so when are we hanging out.” You ask boldly. 

“How about this weekend. We can go out Saturday, and if things lead to it you can come back to the apartment. Jake will probably be there. Do you care?”

Of course he’ll be there. But you couldn't act like that would change your mind. “Yeah that sounds good. I can't wait.”

“This might be a little pushy now but do you maybe wanna call tonight and catch up. Even though we’ve been hanging out during practice we haven't been talking much since then.”

“I mean we didn’t really talk a lot before that either, we kinda just fucked.” You chuckle a little.

 “True but we still texted more. So can we?” Josh asks with puppy dog eyes.

“As much as I’d like to I can’t tonight, I’m going out with Charlotte and the girls. We’re going to go bar hopping.” 

“On a Thursday?”

“Yeah! Thirsty Thursday.” A small giggle bubbles out of you nervously. Why was he making you nervous?

“Okay, well, what about tomorrow night?” He pushes. 

“Someone sounds a little desperate.” You tease him. 

“Is it desperate to want to talk to my friend?” Friend. You hadn’t heard him refer to you as his friend before, it was weird. But you pushed that feeling down and shook it off.

“Yes definitely, we can call, but why don’t you just have me over?”

“My dads coming up on Friday with my little brother to visit. He’s probably gonna come here unless he convinces our parents to let him work on music the way he wants to. Jake didn’t get out of that one.”

You chuckle a little. “Yeah sure we can call tomorrow and then hang out Saturday.”

“Sounds like a plan, I’m really excited.”

“Me too.” You smile at him,  really excited for this new era of the two of you. 

-

As your friends, Arianna and Mae, make their way to your apartment, Char finalizes her look for the evening you finish off your hair still in your satin robe. Char was sporting a red v-neck bodysuit with black flare leather pants. 

As you look at your closet you ponder on what to wear but couldn’t think of anything good. Maybe you could have a little fun tonight. You open your phone to your messages opening a new chat.

9:45pm y/n: What am I wearing tonight hottie?

9:46pm Jake: Didn’t expect to be hearing from you, I missed you.

It felt wrong, but you weren’t tied down, you weren’t with Josh. 

9:47pm y/n: I missed you too, I’ve been thinking about you a lot. Sooo I’m going out tonight, what am I wearing?

9:47pm Jake: Depends, where are you going?

9:48pm y/n: Bar hopping in town.

9:53pm Jake: Wear the baby pink tank that you wore on your insta a few weeks ago for your friend’s sorority event and that white mini skirt you wore in your Christmas post.

9:54pm y/n: Stalker much lol

9:56pm Jake: I told you I’ve had my eye on you for a while now.

You make your way to your closet and pick out the pieces of clothing Jake chose. You opted for no bra since this shirt held your boobs in place since it's pretty tight.

10:05 pm y/n: Done, thanks for the recommendation.

10:06pm Jake: Umm… no. Not how this works, show me beautiful. I wanna see that sexy body of yours.

You take a quick mirror picture, making sure to pose in a way that accentuates your curves. 

10:07pm y/n: Attachment: 1 image

10:08pm Jake: Perfect as always. I really love having some control over you. You know since I can’t really be with you other than in secret. 

10:10pm y/n: Thank you 😘 I like it too, you can control me however you’d like. 

10:12pm Jake: I'll keep that in mind. Keep me updated tonight, I'll be thinking about you.

You slip on your white booties and clasp your plain gold chain around your neck, along with your classic initial necklace and daily earring stack.

“y/n, Arianna and Mae are here now. Are you ready soon?” You hear Char shout from the other room. 

“Yeah one moment!” You make sure your makeup and hair look up to standard and finish everything off with deodorant and a quick spritz of your favorite perfume. You make your way out of your room, being met with the faces of your best friends. The room fills with shrieks and cheers as everyone sees each other all dressed up. 

“You look so hot, y/n. Your outfit is serving cunt,” Char never fails to make you feel good about yourself. Arianna and Mae agree with her, as Ari pulls her phone from her purse. 

“Selfie?” she says holding her phone up. You all lean into each other, smiles plastered across your soon to be drunken faces. 

“Alright! The uber is gonna be here any minute. One shot, then we gotta go.” Char says lining the shot glasses up on the table, she pours the clear liquid into the tiny glasses. Everyone throws their heads back to take their shot.

“WOOOOO! Lets fucking do this!” Mae screams at the top her longs making her way to the door. God you loved these girls.

Once you are finally in the Uber you feel a buzz come from your lap. 

10:27pm Josh: Be safe tonight, lmk if you need anything. I’ll be thinking about you.

I’ll be thinking about you. These twins have you fucked up, majorly.

10:27pm y/n: Thanks, have a good night too ☺️

When you finally make it to your first bar you and the girls hop out of the uber, feeling excited and ready for the night. Your heels clack against the concrete as you make your way down the sidewalk. You open the door of the bar and you’re immediately smacked in the face with deafeningly loud music and an intense wave of heat. 

“Holy shit, it's hot in here,” You hear Mae announce from behind you. You all make your way over to the bar to order your drinks. 

Arianna, Char, and Mae voice their drink choices to the bartender, as you stand there trying to decide what to get. You came to the conclusion that you needed something strong, something to help you let loose and forget about those god damn Kiszka boys. 

“May I have a long island, please.” You politely ask the bartender and turn around on your heels to face your friends. They are all staring back at you with widened eyes, drink in hand. 

“Damn girl, we’re only at the first bar,” Arianna jokes, a laugh erupting from the other two. 

“I know, I just really want to let loose tonight, it’s been so long since we've all seen each other. Besides, it’s okay to get fucked up every now and then,” you wink at them, you all share a boisterous laugh. “Ugh, I missed you guys so much.” You pull them all in for a big group hug, and pull away only when the bartender offers you up your drink. You give him a quick ‘thank you’ and make your way over to the booth the girls snatched up. 

You squeeze into the booth beside Char, who is sipping away at her vodka spritz. You take a sip of your own drink and spark up a conversation, “So, what have you guys been up to lately? Any special men in your lives?” 

You watch as Mae’s cheeks flush a light pink, “Actually, I have been talking to this guy. He's a really cute, kinda surfer boy with blonde hair. He’s from Hawaii and said that I should come down to visit him so he can teach me how to surf. Isn’t that so romantic?”

“How did you meet him?” Ari asks, wanting to know all the details.

“Well I was there in Hawaii for like a month on vacation, he was wearing a Michigan sweatshirt so I went up to chat and he said he was transferring here. We hooked up a few times while I was there and we’ve been talking for a few months now, I think it's getting real.” 

“That's so cute Mae! I'm so happy for you. When will I get to meet this amazing man?” You ask excitedly. You were happy at least one of your friends wasn’t struggling with relationships like you were. 

“Umm I don’t know , maybe I can introduce you guys to him this week. And what about you y/n anyone new on the roster or are you finally settling down?” Mae says, wiggling her eyebrows up and down.

“Nothing crazy, just doing my normal stuff.” You say, trying to bypass the question.

“Ummmm no actually, you’ve been pretty occupied with a certain someone for the past few weeks. He has even been over to the apartment.” Char says sipping at her drink, looking over to Ari and Mae.

“The apartment?! No guys are ever brought there, he must be special y/n.” Mae adds, giving you a sentimental look.

“He’s just been a good hookup, it's really nothing crazy. Don't act like you guys haven't gotten with the same guys more than once.”

“Well who is it?”

“That's none of your business, Ari.” You tease her with a devious smile on your face.

Mae and Ari look to Charlotte, knowing that at some point she would spill. You can see her struggling to hold it in before…

“IT'S JOSH KISZKA! I’m sorry y/n I really tried to keep it in.” Your forehead falls into your palm not wanting to look up at the group. “Charlotte, seriously!”

“Josh Kiszka, like the sexy theater kid Josh Kiszka?” Mae’s eyes are practically popping out of her head.

“Is there any other?” You reply dryly.

“How did you guys start talking, I hear he’s a hard one to get with. Heard he's kind of an ass, too” Ari says leaning towards you.

“Being an ass is 100% true, getting with him was actually pretty easy though. He was ready to risk it all the first time we hung out together outside of practice for the musical.” You feel the alcohol begin to take effect on your body.

“And his brother Jake, well the one time-.” Everyone is sitting waiting for you to finish. “Well he’s always gone. Josh always kicks him out of the house. I barely even knew he existed.” Lie. “Except for when he walked in on us.”

“WHAT! When???” Mae’s bright blue eyes grow even wider than before. 

“I don’t know, a few weeks ago? It was the first time we hung out alone. He made Jake go to a friend's house and then Jake forgot he had to go and walked in on us. Honestly, I think he did it on purpose.”

Ari cuts in. “I bet he did, I had a class with him freshman year and I overheard him talking with some kid. I think it was Tommy Bucks, nonetheless, they were looking at your Insta and Jake was saying some crazy stuff.”

“L-like what?” Suddenly you’re completely sober. 

“Oh I don’t know normal boy stuff. ‘She’s so sexy, I’d fuck her, She has a fat ass.’ Just the usual.” 

“I did end up getting with Tommy actually, I think.” You mention. You all share a little giggle. 

“Have you ever thought about getting with Jake?”

Oh fuck. “Like I said, I don't really know him. Only time I talked to him was when I had to leave and he apologized.” Oh, you were going to hell. 

“Makes sense.” Ari adds, Mae nodding in agreement. But Charlotte's face was telling a different story. Her eyes narrow at you, in suspicion. 

You chug the rest of your drink. “Next bar?” you suggest. 

Everyone nods and quickly takes their last sip before grabbing their things and heading out the door to the next bar. There were a good amount of bars nearby so taking an Uber wasn’t necessary. 

When you finally get to the next bar you start thinking about him. He’s been on your mind a lot recently, but you were so confused with your emotions. Things were becoming way too complicated for your liking. Against your better judgment, you decide to shoot him a text. 

11:15pm y/n: I miss you, I want you. Wish you were here.

11:16pm Jake: I miss you too sexy, and your body. I wish I could be with you, taking that slutty little outfit off. Who picked that out again?😏

“y/n order your drink!!!” Char screams into your ear over the blaring music. You look up from your phone noticing you’ve been staring at your phone for a little bit. 

“I’ll just have a strawberry daiquiri please, thank you.” Your eyes go straight back to your phone, fingers typing away quickly. 

11:16pm y/n: You did baby and I wouldn’t mind you taking it off of me either. 

Something washed over you, maybe you were ovulating but you were feeling a certain type of way. 

11:16pm y/n: Wanna see me, Jakey?

11:17pm Jake: Of course, sexy girl. Show me what's mine.

The bartender hands you your drink, and immediately you take a big gulp emptying half the glass. 

11:18pm y/n: Who said I was yours?

11:18pm Jake: Is anyone else getting these pics?

11:18pm y/n: No

11:19pm Jake: Then they’re mine, along with your body, all mine.

Next thing you know, Charlotte fingers are snapping in your face. “y/n, it’s girls night not ‘whoever your textings’ night.”

“Okay fineee.” You slur out,  shoving your phone back into your purse. You take another large swig of your beverage, following the girls out to the dance floor. One of your favorite party songs comes on, Bloodline by Ariana Grande. Perfect timing. 

“Even though you’re bad for me, I know!” You serenade Charlotte. Well, maybe more like scream at her. “You’re the one that I’m thinkin, got me feelin’ so incredible. Would you mind maybe linkin?” You sway your hips to the beat and every now and then take a sip of your daiquiri. 

Your favorite part of the song comes on, and with the influence that you were under, you were being absolutely obnoxious. “DON'T WANT YOU IN MY BLOODLINE, YUH. NOT TRYNA MAKE YOU ALL MINE, YUH. AND NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE, NO. BUT YOU GON’ HAVE TO LET THIS SHIT GO.” You scream the lyrics with your chest, jumping all around with Char, Ari, and Mae. This was the most fun you had in a while, but he was still lingering in the back of your mind. 

As you continue to dance, your drink slightly sloshes around in your cup. Charlotte, in her drunken haze, accidentally bumps into you,sending your drink flying all over your shirt. “Oh my God, y/n. I-I’m so sorry,” she apologizes, her words slurring together. 

“Char, it’s not a problem, really. I’m just going to run to the bathroom real quick to dry off. I’ll be right back!” You begin to walk away from the dance floor towards the bathroom.

“Do you want me to come help?” You hear Charlotte ask.

“No, no. It’s okay, I promise. I’ll be quick. Might take a piss while I'm in there, too.” You hand your drink to Char and disappear through the singular bathroom door, quickly locking the door behind you. You grab a few pieces of toilet paper and try to wipe off as much of the drink as you can. Oh fuck. When you look into the mirror, your nipples fully see through your baby pink top. Wait. You look back to the door to make sure it is locked. 

Opening your camera you take a few shots of yourself. One straight on, seeing your nipples through the shirt. One from above showing your cleavage, making sure to push and pull them in all the right places. You look back to see them. Damn you look pretty good. You take one more shot from below, showing your ass peeking out of your skirt. Perfect.

11:31pm y/n:  Attachments: 3 Images 

11:31pm y/n: I hope you're still thinking of me, I know I’m thinking of you.

11:33pm Jake: Holy fuck y/n, you’re so fucking hot. I need you so bad. Show me more baby please, I'm so desperate for you. 

11:34pm y/n: You want me to come over?

11:35pm Jake: Really? Please.

11:36pm y/n: No, keep dreaming tho 😉

11:37pm Jake: You're such a tease. I think you owe me now.

11:38pm y/n: You’ll get more later don’t you worry baby. Ttyl 😘

You quickly take your piss and make your way back onto the dance floor trying to find where your friends were sitting. When you finally locate them you take a seat next to Mae and take a sip of your drink.

“Char get off of HayDay, I swear you're addicted.” Mae says from across the table, much louder than she has to.

“HayDay is life guys. I’m almost to level 40 and I need to get my stuff ready for my boat.” She slurs as she stares at her phone like a little kid. You giggle at her taking a larger sip of your drink. I really want a beer.

“I think I’m gonna get a corona. I'm in the mood for it.” You say before slipping off your seat trying to make your way to the bar.

Ari grabs you by the shoulder, “y/n, I think you should slow down a little on the drinks.” 

“Omg you guys are so boringggg. I don’t even have class until 4 tomorrow so I’ll deal with it before then.” You continue your way to the bar asking the bartender for a corona with a lime. As you wait for the bartender to return with your drink you meet with an old face. Oh shit.

“What’s up, pretty lady.”

“Hi Mark.” You give a dry response not super happy to be seeing him especially after the call situation when you were with Josh. 

Mark used to be a regular hook up for you. He was an attractive man, 6 foot 2 and played basketball for the university. You met him in a class last semester and through ‘studying’ you began to see each other more often. Which led to makeouts and then quickly became hookups. But his attractiveness is as far as it went. He had an awful personality and wasn’t very faithful to any of his past girlfriends. And while he may seem charming on the outside, once you got to know him, his aggressiveness came out. He would get mad when you slept with other men even though you weren’t dating. So you slowly weaned off him and didn’t really reach out to him after that. 

“Why the sour face, aren’t you happy to see me?” He asks with his classic smirk.

“Not really Mark, so if you don’t mind I’m gonna go back to my friends now.”

“Whatever y/n, give me a call whenever you’re actively fucking someone else” Mentioning the call that happened the other day. 

“Why did it make you jealous hearing someone else make me feel good?” You give him a fake little pout, pretending to feel sorry for him. 

“Not at all, I know you’ll be crawling back to me whenever you get bored of the current man.” He says bluntly, walking away without another word. 

Fuck him. You grab your drink and head back to the table. “Guys you would not believe who I just saw.” You say sitting back in your seat.

Charlotte looks up from her phone, ready to hear the drama. “Who, spill.”

“Mark.”

“I fucking hate him bro. I don’t know why you hooked up with him for so long.” Char rolls her eyes.

“I didn’t give a shit about his personality, I just wanted to be dicked down.”

“Well, I think it's a sign we should head out.” Char says quickly sipping the rest of her drink down. You quickly grab your beer, chugging as much as you can before handing it off to Mae to finish the rest.

The last two bars were a drag. You didn’t drink that much due to the fact that you heavily drank in the last two. You finally get into the Uber and doze off until you are nudged by Char when you arrive at the apartment. 

When you make your way inside you shake off your boots and head back to your room. Jeez you look a mess. A hot mess nonetheless. You open your phone to a couple texts. 

The first being from Josh. 

12:47am Josh: Lmk when you get home safe. 

1:23am y/n: I just got back, Thanks for checking in on me, Josh. 🥰 Ttyt

The second being a less innocent text from his twin brother. 

1:04am Jake: I’ve been thinking about you all night. There hasn’t been a moment I wasn’t thinking of you. 

1:12am Jake: You make me wanna touch myself y/n. 

1:25am y/n: I can help you out with that 😉

1:26am Jake: Please baby I need it. If you don’t want to, it's okay, but I wanna cum to you. You make me fucking crazy.

You smirk at his texts. Oh, how you love begging men. You slip off your top and take a picture of yourself, holding one tit in your hand pushing it up slightly, snapping the photo. Maybe it was the alcohol but something came over you. You begin to take a little video. Holding your tit and pushing it up to your mouth. Sticking your tongue out trying to lick your tits, something that has been proven to get the men going. 

1:29am y/n: 2 Attachments: 1 image, 1 video 

1:30am y/n: I’ll talk to you tomorrow, enjoy your little videos, and don’t be scared to save them for a later date. Night Jakey😘

Without waiting for another text you plug in your phone and take off your skirt slipping into a large shirt. Taking off your makeup was not even a thought, you crawled into bed, reminiscing the best girls night out ever.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

@demonrat444 @gvfstuddedmajesty @jordie-gvf @jazzyfigz @slut4lando @gvfmarge @peaceloveunitygvf @jjwasneverhere @areuirish @mar-rein12 @woyayaofdreams @freyjalw @musicspeaks @jennabobenasblog @do-it-jakey-baby @dannys-dream @sarah-gvf01 @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface

[curiositymemes]

MISTER MAGIC SENTENCE STARTERS : PART TWO.

taken from the 2023 novel by kiersten white. trigger warnings for unreality, trauma, religion, and cults. feel free to change wording and pronouns and provide context as necessary. do not add to this list.

“what do we say about crying?”

“you had a lot of nightmares.”

“at least i don’t snore?”

“i wouldn’t mess with her / him / them.”

“that was really kind. thank you.”

“it’s just what i was supposed to do all along.”

“why do you have it?”

“don’t you remember— no, i guess you don’t.”

“please take this as kindly as possible, but what the hell does that mean?”

“i forgot what a dork you can be.”

“only you could make me do this. you’re as pushy as ever.”

“is this what prom was like?”

“i hate missing free food.”

“we just have to wait a little longer. you’ll see.”

“we could go be beautiful somewhere else, instead.”

“or your ass is mine.”

“what is she / is he / are they doing here? i can’t deal with her / him / them, not right now. not ever.” 

“you know how important tonight is to me.” 

“i’ve worked a long time for this.”

“take me with you. i can’t do this alone.”

“wasn’t it the best?”

“i’ve lived here my whole life.”

“angels were everywhere, if you knew how to recognize them. if you knew how to make a deal.”

“suffer the children, you know.”

“not everything needs a reboot.”

“go home and cry joylessly into your still-in-the-box transformers.” 

“someone’s got to compensate for my terrible influence in his life / her life / your life / their lives.”

“lol delaware isn’t a real place.”

“what is all this talk of killing and death?”

“you’re here now, and you’re going to fix it. you’re going to make it right. you owe us that much, don’t you?”

“i don’t like to think about what happened; the pieces don’t make sense.”

“guess i was wrong about not needing to sneak in our own booze. luckily, i’m always prepared.”

“please don’t tease me.” / “i would never.” 

“everyone will stare.” / “they’re all staring anyway.”

“you! you broke everything!”

“what was that?”

“we won’t let them / him / her do this to you.”

“whatever else she is / he is / they are, name’s a loyal friend.”

“you need this. don’t let them know you have it.”

“you deserve— you all deserve to know.”

“can we get out of here?”

“come on. we’re going to make a bonfire.”

“i woke up in the middle of the night and it was glowing.”

“how do you know how to do this?”

“i can build a fire, administer basic first aid, and bullshit my way into making older people think i’m trustworthy.”

“he / she / they / you didn’t protect me from that.” 

“i’ve never not been a mom / dad / parent.”

“that’s the only time i ever got to be a kid.”

“don’t be a little shit.”

“you never forget the lesson that they would rather destroy you than let you inconvenience them.”

“it’s hard, and you’re doing it anyway.”

“fucktrumpet! shitgibbon! cockwomble!”

“be serious for once!”

“i need to know what happened to her / him / them / you / us.”

“anyone who was looking for you, anyone who took the trouble to find you: they’re not your friend.”

“you have to get out of there. now.”

“you can’t get better until you’ve hit rock bottom. you know that.”

“what if forgetting is a gift?” 

“i wish i could forget it.” 

“we missed you, name.”

“you didn’t give up, even when it got hard and a little scary. sometimes things are a little hard and scary. that’s when we need each other the most.”

“i am losing my mind.”

“i missed you the most.”

“i want it back.”

“i can’t force you to do it. but i need you to do this for me. for us.” 

“weird vibe in here, you guys.”

“please, come with me. nothing here is good for you.”

“i know that sounds sad but it wasn’t.”

“don’t look at me like i’m the one who’s being a bitch.” 

“what the hell? how is that possible?”

“tell me whether i saw what i think i saw.”

“how long have you been down here?”

“we don’t say that.” / “why not? they’re just words.”

“so really, all words are magic. something from nothing.”

“you were always good at words, weren’t you? good at making the others do what you wanted.”

“i’m tired of talking.”

“nothing is more powerful than imagination.”

“we all chose what to remember. or what to forget.”

“maybe it’s a deepfake.”

“fuck me. fuck me, fuck me. fuck all of us.”

“i’m sorry. i’m really, really sorry. i didn’t know.”

“i’ll see what they want.”

“name. fuckface. fuckface junior.”

“dunno what i did, dunno how to fix it, don’t really care.” 

“i’m going with you. we do this together.”

“you all realize this is insane, right? this is how we die.”

“at least i’ll go out doing what i love: being an absolute fuckwit making the worst possible choice.” / “no. being an absolute fuckwit making the worst possible choice in the best possible company.”

“is that how it was always supposed to feel?”

“i’m ready to break things.”

“i never would have left you.”

“i won’t let anything happen to you.”

“give me my fucking friends back.”

“tell me how to get you out of here. tell me how to fix it.”

“i believe in you. you protected us all back then, when we didn’t even know you were doing it. let us help you now.”

“we have to buy her / him / them / you time.”

“we should do what we do best.”

“it’s all still here.”

“let’s summon a demon!”

“this is so trippy! and stupid. i think it’s mold.”

“it’s not better in here, name. i know it feels like it could be, but it’s not. it never was.”

“you haven’t forgotten who you were, but you’re even better at it.”

“name is fucking with people who don’t have his / her / their best interests at heart.”

“that’s gotta be driving them insane to watch.”

“i’m nothing without it. i’ve never been anything without it.”

“you’ve always been enough by yourself. no one has ever been as loyal and smart and funny and fierce and deeply, deeply annoying as you.”

“i want to be a person. whole. happy with just myself. but how do we do that?” / “therapy.”

“in today’s session, i’d like to revisit the period of your childhood that was controlled by a minor deity in a pocket universe.”

“you’re all so stupid.”

“i love you, and i’m so proud of you.”

“you came back for us after all, name. i always knew you would.” / “really?” / “no. but i love being wrong. i’m really good at it.”

“he’s / she’s / they’re gone. you’ve always been good enough. you can do this alone.”

“i would have loved you so well.”

“you stayed.” / “i stayed.”

“go on. i believe in you.”

“you know what that’s like, if you let yourself remember.” 

“it’s not perfect, but it doesn’t need to be.”

[toburnup]

Hey Vio, im currently stuck at the airport for a super delayed flight after a pretty shitty end to the holiday! I come to you hoping you might share a excerpt from a WIP to help lift my spirits (and pass the time)?

<33 my dear Corbie!!! i'm so sorry to hear abt your airport delays. that sounds nightmarish.

i have an excerpt from pt 3 to sleep it off - but let me know if this isn't your kind of fic and i can dig around for another WIP!

💫💫💫

Steve wakes up and his body is boiling and he's dizzy, skin hot. He struggles to his feet and gets to the phone, dials Eddie's number with unsteady fingers.

Eddie answers this time, thankfully. Sounds tired.

"...Hello?"

"Hey. It's me."

Eddie doesn't speak for a long second and Steve glances around, waits. "Eddie?"

"Yeah." He clears his throat. "What's up?" Like Steve could be calling just after midnight for a quick catch up.

"It's bad again." Steve says quietly. "Like I'm warm. And, uh, feels like I have a fever but I don't."

"Shit, really?" A quick pause. "I'm feeling okay."

Steve spirals. Just a little. "What does that mean? Am I dying?"

"You should call-"

"Don't tell me to call Owens." Steve snaps. "He'll tell me to take a fucking nap. Just come over." Steve rubs his eyes. "The side door is unlocked. I need to go back to bed."

"Steve-" Eddie says but Steve hangs up, limps back to his room. Climbs back in and the sheets feel rough on his skin and he lays flat on his stomach. Can't even rest properly.

He sits and stews and groans a little. It feels like hours have passed when he hears the sound of the door closing downstairs, and his body lights up a bit. Like it knows it's Eddie.

"Steve?"

"Up here." Steve croaks, and the sight of Eddie turning the corner at the top of the stairs... the relief is palpable. Floods Steve's whole body and he smiles even though his skin feels tight.

"You don't look so good." Eddie says, and Steve nods. Waits as Eddie steps closer, less hesitant than before.

Underneath the venom-induced haze, Steve realizes he missed Eddie. Feels it hit his chest when Eddie gives him a small yet concerned smile. His face is pale and his eyes are big but he doesn't look nearly as rough as he did before.

"I feel like shit." Steve says. "Sit down."

"Pushy." Eddie mutters, but pulls at his laces and leaves his shoes on the floor and sits on the edge of his bed. Leans his hand on the bed beside him and Steve can't help but wrap his hand around his wrist, pulls him down until Eddie gives in and lays down beside him.

"How come you're okay?" Steve mumbles, waits as Eddie pulls the blanket up over him even though he's still wearing his jeans.

"I don't know."  Eddie is on his side, looking at him and Steve's whole head hurts so he moves in, winds his arm around Eddie's waist. He feels so delightfully cool. His fingers are freezing where they brush against his bare arm.

"Fuck. It hurts." Steve mumbles, pulls Eddie's hand closer and up his side. Hears Eddie's hitch of breath and then the quiet moan as he pulls Steve against him.

"You're warm." Eddie murmurs against him, his hands trailing up Steve's back, one underneath his shirt. It's different than before, muted. Like hearing a familiar song playing in the other room. Eddie's hand catches on his shoulder, finally rests against the side of his neck and it makes the flurry of sensations in Steve's stomach rise.

"So what."

"I don't know, it's weird, right? I don't really feel... like I did before." Eddie says quietly, but he's hard against Steve's hip. And this is helping, makes the aching fade a little, and Steve wants Eddie to stop being above this.

"What, you don't want to?" Steve asks, still has Eddie's words from the first night burned into his memory. It's crossed my mind a couple times. Can tell from Eddie's face that he wants this, bites or no bites.

[brookeginko]

Yukair 2, 7, 21 and 22 for the ask thing >:]

YAYYYYYYYY THANK YOU BAGEL YOU KNOW ME SO WELL

2: What’s your favorite canon thing about this character?

I love a most things about Yukari but if I had to pick just one I’d say it’s how realistically she’s written. In her romance route she admits to being jealous and upset when Fuuka hung around Makoto even though she knew it was an unreasonable thing to be upset over, and she says it makes her feel like a horrible person. Similarly in Yakushima she says something along the lines of “After everything that’s happen why does Mitsuru’s father get to live but not mine?” What I particularly like about this part of her character is that she knows what she’s saying is selfish and expresses it to Makoto with that knowledge in mind. She knows that but she can’t stop herself from feeling that way, and it’s so so natural for a girl her age who’s gone through everything she has that it just makes me ooiiiuuughhjjjggn /pos. I will always be a Yukari defender until I die and one of the main criticisms against her is that she’s ’too mean’ and while I obviously disagree with that one of my favorite parts of her is that she’s can be mean and say mean things but that’s because she’s 16 years old and has the fate of the world on her shoulders. I’d be a bit mean too. Rest in peace rank 5 hug scene i will always be your #1 defender.

#7: What’s something the fandom does with this character that you like?

OOH OKAY. I could go with the copout answer of everyone and their mother hcing her as a lesbian but outside the realm of sexuality hcs I like when people draw/write her as more toned and buff because like. Girl is an archer and running around Tartarus for an hour every night can’t be easy. I also like it when people give her archery more significance in general because canon gives us very very little to work with, especially compared to Akihiko ‘definitely doesn’t have a boxing special interest’ Sanada, so I like when people elaborate further on her time on the archery team since we know almost nothing about it.

21: If you’re a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

OOH YAYYY okay hm. Admittedly I haven’t written for Yukari as much as I would have liked to but for the 3 or so fics I’ve written about her and the rps I’ve done, I’d say my favorite thing to write is her self-aware jealousy. The line in her romance route about being jealous of Fuuka but it making her feel like a horrible person stuck out to me a lottt so I try to incorporate it in fics as much as I can. Especially in terms of ship fics I think she would be really really jealous of anyone she thinks could be interested in the person she’s interested in but she would feel awful about it and just kinda get caught in a loop of ‘oh no kotone is spending time with akihiko she’s probably crushing on him’ —> ‘oh my god im gonna kill akihiko senpai why is he taking up all of her time does he LIKE her?????? ew’ —> ‘wait no that sounds mean akihiko senpai is fine i guess. it’s not like i own Kotone’s time or anything that was a weird thing to think yukari’ —> ‘oh god im a horrible person Kotone wouldn’t want to spend time with me anyway’ —> gets text from Kotone asking if she wants to come beat up pedestrians with akihiko or something —> back to square one. Unfortunately I don’t think I’ve published any fics with this dynamic but I’ve rped it and have drafts and I just….. I love jealous Yukari so much. Runner up is when she’s protective and somewhat pushy about it. I’ve written this with Shuyuka before because Makoto has the self preservation instincts of a goldfish cracker and I find it very sweet. As for things I don’t like I worry sometimes that I make her a bit too mean to Junpei? Though that’s more of a general Junpei-bullying problem I have rather than a Yukari-specific one LMFAO

22: If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

Despite what my Bible length fanfics would suggest I actually don’t read a ton of fics so I’ll expand this a bit into the fandom in general. As stated above I really like when people make her more athletic but on the flip side I do enjoy when people make her the femmest lesbian to ever femme. I feel like in some situations people try to make femme characters more girlbossy and end up removing a lot of their femininity so I like fics and fanworks that make her a cool archer that also has seventeen dresses in the exact same color. For things I don’t like though, I don’t really like it when Yukari is made to be helpless? I understand that it’s like that in canon a few times (Awakening, Yakushima, something else im probably forgetting) but I feel like a lot of (cishet) shuyuka fans especially tend to make it into a hot yaoi base ‘gigachad door kun x little soft baby yukari’ and i just. comically large frown.

[skunkes]

wrt last reblog I also saw something recently that resonated with me, adjacent to it.

OP of the video im talking about explained that making friends is hard as an adult, but what if you finally make a friend and after a few hangouts you realize you dont actually like them? She goes on to say that she doesn't want to be friends with people she only Kind Of likes, because she had to do that all through her teenage years (likely at school).

But meeting people you instantly click with and have foundations for a real friendship is rare, so what are you supposed to do? Friend-break-up with someone? That's just rude. But having to maintain friendship with someone you only sort of like is also exhausting...

I made a new, quickly very close friend recently and was talking about dis to them, I talked about how I struggle making friends but after seeing some people's online circles I'm okay with that. Because I don't know how people juggle having so many acquaintances/Not Actual Friends. I could never do that. I want my time to go to myself and others I love and not having to either find excuses for plans I don't actually want to partake in or feel like I have to hang out with acquaintances for "maintenance" or to "reset the required hangout timer."

Hoping that doesnt sound Evil...having to do that with acquaintances is just one of those Life things, its normal but I'd prefer not have to do it more than I have to...ykwim

And how do you tell someone "um well its not that i dont like you but I cant imagine our friendship ever deepening to a point where im super comfortable with you and actively want to spend lots of time with you sooo bye!"

Not every friendship needs to be like that btw, acquaintances are important but one would rather just have more time to spend with the people they DO connect with better.

Also acquaintance doesn't automatically mean bad! I have acquaintances that I enjoy talking to and hanging out with even though we wont ever be Besties, I guess this post was more focused on acquaintances where the feeling is more like. They like you way way way more than you like them...

Idk. Last post reminded me of that. Its hard to make friends and I also dont seek it out because Id rather not have to also forever juggle a sea of pushy acquaintances while searching for the deep connections (which I'm so lucky to have found more often, by chance. Guess I just have to keep waiting around to get lucky.)

Meeting people you can actually connect with DOES take so much energy and time. And its hard to just stop contacting the people you dont click with along the way sometimes. So much energy to maintain the same level of effort and emotional investment across multiple different relationships when I'd rather just be deepening bonds with the people I do have/finding more of those Exact Same Bonds. Idk!

Weird type of lonely. I dont want to be friends with people I only sort of like...

[goblin-spider]

[Log 009]

<Call incoming 📞>

«quiet down manual. Who is it?.»

<Everett Connelly>

«answer it.»

[Morning. Reporting in from the bunker. Mergwen, Patrick and Noah have all gone to bed but I've stayed up to keep watch. Carla is safe and sound in Noah's room.]

«*exhales* I'm so relieved everyone made it out alive. How screwed is 206?»

[facility 206 has successfully been taken down. All employees have been... For a lack of a better word...set free.]

«and the mutants?»

[Spared. Gwen was quite adamant about killing them too but we stopped her. Gets a little bit carried away with a gun.]

«*snorts* and you don't?»

[*chuckles* course not. Since I made manual a little bit more lax, I haven't been too bad with a gun... I wish you could have seen it though.]

«Hmm... It would've been delicious to slice into them myself.»

[Gwen had the pleasure of doing that.]

«Wow. I didn't take her for a blade fan. So, she's not nuts or anything after all that?»

[No. Not at all. Speaking of her, something great happened.]

«More good news? I definitely need good news right now.»

[She offered to let me mix toxins with her.]

*There's a beat*

«Come again?»

[She offered to mix toxins with me...]

«Norm, you're not meant to be doing that. It's weird. Is she hurt at all? Your hands-»

[-i don't care what I should and shouldn't do. It didn't happen but I was tempted.]

«n-no more details, thanks.»

*Mer can't tell if norms lying or not. He can't physically go ask Gwen herself. Something about it feels wrong, as if he'd been violated in some way. Especially since Gwen's his variant.*

«*clears his throat* did you ... . -. -.. / -- -.-- / -.-. --- --- .-. -.. .. -. .- - . ... / - --- / ..-. .. .-. . .-.. .. --. .... - ..--..»

[don't tell me you're still stuck in there.]

«Of course I am. They keep this place highly secure. I'm in a containment field. Did you or did you not?»

[I did and i've got some bad news for you.]

«...»

[Gabriel is probably not coming. He can't portal inside.]

*His lip quivers*

[don't cry, it's weak and you know crying is probably what they'd like to see from you. Besides, I've been thinking of ending him, then you can come back and be a family with Patrick, Noah and I.]

«I don't love Patrick. I haven't in a long while. Didn't I explain this already? If you do anything to him, your brain's being fried. You hear me? I'll pull it out and let that shit burn.»

[I can easily replace him.]

«No you fucking can't.»

*Norm starts feeling rage. He scans the room and detects a Gabriel variant watching*

[how does it feel having another Gabe stare into the back of your head while you're trapped?, Uncaring and unhelpful as you suffer?]

*He only starts bawling*

[please stop crying. It's useless in this situation and only makes you look stupid.]

*his bawling turns to wailing as everything becomes all too much. All the stress, all the pressure, all the harrassing because he didn't want to be with a robot, everything. He had things right. Things were okay. Why was norm being so mean and pushy? Why was he trapped in this holo cage? Why couldn't He go home and see his children? He crumbles under the weight of the world and splatters under it.*

[The fact that you can't hold it in is despicable in the face of an enemy.]

*mer still refused to say anything to norm, his entire chest heaved in pain, feeling the old familiar sting of release. Maybe holding it in would have been better but what could be worse. He was alone. Alone just like he'd always wanted. He was filthy like his family name and nothing could bring him back. Spider man was meant to be a hero. Now he's a goblin.*

[You know, I like working for Mergwen and Patrick better. You're a weak piece of trash with no spine and no intelligence.(⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠) You sit here, crying like a child over hurting someone and being captured. You're nothing like Harry. You're nothing like Norman. You're nothing like Spider man. You're not even anything like Noah. Is that boy even yours? How could someone as measly as you make something like that?]

*Mer's crying only gets worse. He hated being insulted through his helmet and being unable to bite back. Norms words sounded like word vomit hurled at him just to hurt, and boy did they hurt.*

[Gabe can't even get in the building. None of us are going to come for you. That other Gabriel couldn't care less either. I can't believe I loved you when you're so... <Manual disabled ｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡> You're stupid and ugly and deformed and everyone, including your own friends hate you now. You're annoying. Weak.]

*mer didn't utter a word and tried to ignore him. What was so wrong with crying? What was so wrong with what he did? Wasn't this the best course of action?. Wasn't he doing a good thing?*

[Get the hell up and face the other Gabriel. Use your powers for Thor's sake, do something-]

«Everett, shut up. Please just shut up. *Sobbing* You're huuurrrting meeeeee!»

*He smashed his head against the containment field*

«It huuurrrttttsss! It hurts inside. It hurts. Everything hurts.»

*he smashed his head against the containment field again.*

[Don't tell me you feel guilty about your revenge now.]

*He smashed his head against the containment field again*

«nooooooo. *Sob* I don't care about that. They got what they deserved for what they did to Gabe. They should be grateful I didn't kill bowe!. I care about my family. *Sobbing* I try my best to make everyone happy all the time and to make my home, a place Noah can grow up safe in. *Sniff* Oscorp goes and it'll be safer. *Hic* safer *smash* for everyone. I hate it here. *Smash* I hate it!.»

*smash*

[Crying won't help. Smashing your head that softly into the-]

*Smash*

*Smash*

*Smash*

«HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!»

*CRASH*

«THERE EVERETT! *SMASH* IM LAUGHING! HEHEHEHEHE HEHEHEHEHE!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LAUGHING! LAUGHING! LAUGHING! *SMASH* IS THIS BETTER THAN CRYING?! AM I A STUPID *SMASH BUZZ* IDIOTIC *BUZZ CRACK* PIECE OF SHIT?! *CRACK BUZZ BUZZ*»

[yes, actually, you are all those things. Facts and brains aren't your strong suit...]

*laughing mixed with sobbing in between can be heard as mer mutates further than ever before. His genes were starting to override his spider mutation and his body ached with the need to kill*

[...Are they? (⁠ʘ⁠ᴗ⁠ʘ⁠✿⁠)]

*mer hits his head so hard that the field sends an electrical spark into his head. He's shot backwards and lands on his back, twitching.*

*Mer started laughing and sobbing again. Nothing could stop it from coming out. Overflowing with the mixture of everything he'd shoved down. He was no longer being loud about it though. They came out in weak attempts.*

*Everett had stopped talking at that point, choosing to listen to mer destroy himself as he twisted into a goblin like creature and started tearing at his own flesh.*

«My silence knot is tied up in my hair...»

*weak crying as chunks of hair were ripped from his scalp*

«As if to keep my love out of my eyes. I cannot speak to one for whom I care. A hatpin serves as part of my disguise...»

*he gets himself up and pulls his knife out of his boot, coughing up acid and hopping over to face the direction where the other Gabe watched*

«In the play... my role is baticeer...»

*He stares at the door of the room, twirling his knife before stabbing the containment field.*

«A word which here means "person who trains bats." The audience may feel a prick of fear, As if sharp pins are hidden in their hats...»

*he stabs the knife in again and then uses his claws to dig deep into the containment field*

«My co-star lives on what we call a brae. His solitude might not be just an act.»

*the containment field buzzed and cracked as he spat acid at it, weakening it, needing to go home. Everetts words swirling in his head as his head and body ached from the soreness of what he did to himself.*

«A piece of mail fails to arrive one day. This poignant melodrama's based on fact.»

*He knows Gabe's probably waiting somewhere, looking for ways to get in Lily's home.*

«The curtain falls just as the knot unties»

*he cracks open the containment field enough to get his hand through and shoots a web at the door to the room, pulling hard to try and open it..*

«The silence broken by the one who dies.»

*he can hear norm hauling insults at him through the helmet and he hoped to Loki that he could get out just to kill him.*

[end of log]

[wondereads]

Weekly Reading Update (07/03/23)

Reviews and thoughts under the cut

Woven By Gold by Elizabeth Helen (8/10)

I immediately picked up the sequel to Bonded By Thorns since it was such a fun read. As with the first one, the romance is very strong and probably my favorite part of the book. Also, we get to know more about the princes (including the evil one) and their complicated pasts with their actions and one another. I felt like Rosalina was adapting a little quickly, but then I remember that she's spent months in the fae world at this point and it seems less unrealistic. As fantasy romances are wont to do, the plot is a little thin and drawn out, but I really only have two major gripes. One, the problem introduced at the end of book one is resolved almost immediately, which was a little unsatisfying, but it did introduce some characters and plot points. Two, the 'big mystery' concerning specifically Rosalina and her family is so obvious. Like, I get that they are not aware of the tropes of the genre they're in, but come on. Surely someone can at least suspect it?

The Wicked King by Holly Black (10/10)

The Wicked King is absolutely my favorite book of Folk of the Air. I just love magical politicking, and Jude does it so well. This sounds weird, but her time in the Undersea is a part that has always stuck with me. She's obviously miserable, but I think it's when I realized just how far Jude would go for her ambitions (and just how far Cardan would go for her) and I love it. Speaking of Cardan, the build in their relationship is so well done; a true enemies-to-lovers arc if there ever was one. As much as I know what's really going on with the twist at the end, it still hurt to read. I enjoyed this reread so much that I ended up changing my rating from a 9 to a 10 because I really can't think of anything to criticize about this book.

Everblaze by Shannon Messenger (9/10)

I think Everblaze marks a significant turning point in the Keeper books. This is the first time we start really interacting with species outside elves, specifically politically, and it's the first time doubt in the council comes front and center. The books are starting to explore what the worldbuilding actually means, and it means a lot of dubious things when it comes to control and privacy. The development at the very end (and I mean very, literally last page) disrupts the pattern that has been set in these books so far, and it definitely makes you want to keep reading. Fitz and Biana sufficiently redeem themselves in this one, but Dex is going to have to step it the fuck up before I even consider giving him another chance, especially since I already don't like his pushy romantic feelings for Sophie. As always, my favorite relationships lie in Sophie and Keefe and Sophie and Grady and Edaline, the latter of which really stood out this book.

The Queen of Nothing by Holly Black (9/10)

There are 308 pages in this book. I highlighted something 228 times. I remember when I read this book the first time I was a little disappointed that there wasn't much of the intense scheming that came with The Wicked King, and I take that back. Maybe Jude's plans are a little more straightforward this time around, but even knowing what was going to happen there was still an insane amount of suspense. The relationships in this book are so strong, and not just romantically. Jude and Madoc's fraught parent-child relationship in particular has me riveted; it's incredibly complicated and so good. But also romantically, Jude and Cardan are at the top of their game this book, and it's amazing to see Cardan so unashamedly in love. They deserve their happy ending and to take off their armor, one piece at a time.

A Good Girl's Guide to Murder by Holly Jackson (10/10)

I've been interested in this book for a while, but I was finally prompted to read it by the TV show announcement. And I can definitely say I wasn't disappointed. If you watch any sort of procedural show, this will be right up your alley. I loved how the actual investigation was laid out with Pip's notes and diagrams in the book. It made me feel like I was solving the mystery right alongside her. The focus is definitely on the murder, but I still got a good sense of Pip's personal life and how her obsession with the case was affecting her and her relationships. I won't lie, one of the most anxiety-inducing parts was her college applications, but maybe that's just me. I managed to predict who the killer was, but the actual story behind the whole thing made my jaw drop. I can't wait to read the rest of the series and see the show!

Guardians of Dawn: Zhara by S. Jae-Jones (5/10)

This book is not irredeemable. The plot is unoriginal but not nonsensical or boring, the magic is super interesting, and Zhara has a lot of potential as a character. However, most of the characters are one-dimensional and uncompelling and the writing is...not good. The unending focus on the romance when there were so many other interesting things going on was so frustrating. And then there was the unashamed insertion of what is clearly meant to be BTS (yes, worldwide kpop sensation BTS) that completely destroyed my immersion. Also, the disability rep is pretty dubious. I was pretty disappointed by this read, which sucks because I think it had a lot of potential.

Half a Soul by Olivia Atwater (10/10)

This book is like if Pride & Prejudice and Howl's Moving Castle had a baby, and I ate it up. This book perfectly blended a historical romance with engaging fantasy elements. Dora is a wonderful main character; she's lovable and engaging while still have a completely unique personality that really makes her stand out amongst a lot of fantasy romance protagonists. The love interest is suitably snarky while still being respectful and kind, especially to Dora. Their interactions are fun while still being incredibly romantic. The plot works well with the romance and characters, culminating in a very satisfying ending. Finally, I really appreciate the ending for Dora's issue in particular; it works well for her character and is, in my opinion, in good taste. I highly recommend this book, especially if you're looking for a light, quick read!

The Assassin's Blade by Sarah J. Maas (CR, 57%)

I'm kind of just reading this one to get through it. The stories are fairly interesting, but I was told it provides valuable context for Queen of Shadows, which is really the only reason I'm reading it. I'm not a huge fan of prequels; I don't like reading stories that I already know the ending of. So far, while some things have been interesting, like Celaena's training in the desert, it's very obvious that everything is building up to what I already know is going to happen. As such, I have really no interest in letting myself get attached to any of the characters, which is kind of affecting the quality of my reading.

[rxttenfish]

Damien x Liam

&

Zoe x Vera

Shipping meme.

oh, damien and liam is one of those classic monprom ships! i think the very first ship art i saw from monprom was damien and liam? it sounds right, though it has been over five years since i first joined, so that could just be my memory not serving me well. point goes is that it's a prominent one and gotta be one of the most popular of the RO x RO ships, and definitely one that's the most alluded to in canon.

the issue is just... i still don't like it very much. to be fair i like very few m/m ships, and i know this is such a popular dynamic that from the offset it just automatically felt the most like a ship that would get popular, but it's a popular dynamic that i hate a lot. i don't really care for the bully/nerd dynamic nor the things it sets up, and especially with things like it highlighting damien's toxic masculinity combining less than favorably with how much liam openly and directly talks about things like sexism within the game itself. it's just... unfortunate, i think.

it feels like everything just conspired to make me hate this ship. it's liam, one of my favorite characters, with damien, one of my least favorite characters. most of the events with these two involve damien beating liam up or beating him down, and while i would agree that the two are still friends from the events that are exceptions to this rule and how it just plays out when it does happen (liam is... very directly the masochistic type, so it doesn't necessarily strike me as out of character or even a badly thought out part of the dynamic if this is part of the selling point on a friendship with damien for liam), it always feels weird and off-putting to me. i think this probably works best, and i prefer it best, as them being occasional fuckbuddies on top of friends, less as a proper romantic relationship.

zoe and vera is another ship that i've seen before, and i can definitely see it more than liam and damien. though i'm notoriously known for not really caring all that much for zoe as a character, thinking of her as kinda weakly written in comparison to some of the others on top of including tropes i hate, which also makes this complicated for me.

i think vera's also always an odd one to ship with, because there's a duality between her constructed image and how she allows people to approach her, and what she actually wants and needs in a relationship for emotional fulfillment. she needs someone who can make her relax and slow down, provide a way to remove her from her whole constructed image to let her be a person again, but they cannot simply disregard that image and what it means, cannot wholly discard her interests and ambitions and all that she's put work into attaining. there's a careful dance that has to be done to disarm her suspicions and her harshness before she lets someone in, but once they're in they need to be loving and fond and safe in a simple way, an easy way that vera otherwise would deny herself.

it's not that i don't think zoe could do it, could be that person. rather, zoe isn't very careful at much of anything that she does, and she's so overt and sometimes even pushy that i worry more about all of it making vera freeze up, shut down, lock zoe out. vera in comparison is... harsh and blunt, yes, but her personality is multi-layered and multi-faceted where what you see is not always what you are going to get, and being able to navigate the complexities of her moods and emotions are needed. she can be quick to punish and quick to say the exact kind of nasty things upon the slightest infraction that could all too easily hurt zoe. being overtly affectionate and positive can work, as we've seen with her friendship with scott, but it also needs an ability to take the punishment she can dole out, either just not getting it or not taking offense in either manner. this can also certainly be done if the other character is person-smart enough to realize what's going on beneath the surface, like polly. this doesn't feel, to me, like something that zoe can do, rather being more the type to take the first time vera lashes out as deep personal offense and either not recovering from it or taking a much longer time to recover from it.

which, again, isn't to say this can't work! i think it certainly could work well, especially if you're fleshing out a timeline or plotting this out more thoroughly, and after this specific period i could see them being very good for each other, but it's also something that is enough to make me skeptical.

[maybeimamuppet]

picking teams- chapter 8: cady

helloooo folks happy wednesday!! welcome to the homecoming chapter ooooh. also only next chapter you'll actually get some cadnis finally lol whoops 

tw for 

disordered eating thoughts 

slut shaming 

homophobia

implied SA

and as always if i've missed anything please let me know so i can add it :)

enjoy!

—————

Cady finds herself really enjoying the tutoring sessions she has with Janis. 

Janis is polite. She always says hello and chats briefly with Cady's parents on the rare occasions they're there at the same time. She never leaves messes when Cady offers her something to eat while they work, and she's never pushy during the actual tutoring. 

Cady's also learned that she's much smarter than people give her credit for. Janis' questions may be about things Cady finds simple, but after a more in depth explanation and a few extra practice problems, she picks things up in no time. Not to mention how much she's helped Cady with her English and history homework assignments. 

But, the best part is, Janis is so... sweet. She always seems happy just to make conversation with Cady. She's always interested to hear Cady's Kenya stories. Nobody else in America has been. Except for Karen, but Cady knows she doesn't really understand what she's talking about. Janis tells Cady her own stories, and Cady likes to think they're becoming friends. 

She certainly hopes they are, anyway. 

Janis looks at her in confusion as she stands up towards the end of their session one Saturday, rooting through her closet for something to wear. "You going somewhere?" 

"Hm?" Cady hums, turning around with a short skirt and a tank top in her hands. She grabs a denim jacket, too. It's chilly today, but Regina threatened to burn all her jeans if she wore them in public one more time. "Oh, I'm going homecoming shopping with Regina and Gretchen and Karen after this. It always takes me forever to figure out what to wear." 

"Oh," Janis says. "Sounds fun."

"Yeah, shopping with them usually is," Cady says. "I mean, I always get totally overwhelmed and all the fabrics feel awful, but I like the process." 

"That's about how it goes," Janis chuckles. "I always hated polyester too." 

"It's the worst! It's never comfy," Cady pouts. "But it's all they say I look good in." 

"You look good in anything." 

"Thanks," Cady says with a smile. Janis won't look at her, for whatever reason. Cady shrugs and heads to the restroom to get changed. "I'll be right back."

"Okay," Janis says, her voice a bit squeaky. She must be having a weird day. 

Cady does have to admit that her friends have good taste. As uncomfortable as the clothes are when she puts them on, she does look pretty in them. Regina's taught her that shorter skirts will make her legs look longer and more proportional to the rest of her body. Tighter shirts make her look thinner, and layers are an extra bonus. She tucks the shirt in to highlight her waistline, and sucks her tummy in the slightest bit to zip up her skirt. 

Maybe one of these days she'll recognize herself when she looks in the mirror wearing these clothes. 

Cady heads back into her bedroom after giving her curls a quick fluff. "How's it going?" 

"Fine," Janis murmurs. Cady turns around to look at her and finds Janis staring quite interestedly at her math work. 

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Janis says, barely glancing at Cady. "You look nice."

"Thanks," Cady grins. She swipes on some quick makeup while Janis finishes working, then plops down next to her to look over it. "All right again! I think we can move on next time."

"Thank god," Janis sighs, going totally boneless in her beanbag. "If I had to do one more of those I think my brain would melt out my ears." 

"I mean, you'll probably have to at some point," Cady says. "You do have that test next week."

"Shh. Let me have this moment of peace."

"Okay," Cady giggles. She relaxes on her own beanbag, looking up at her ceiling like Janis is doing next to her. Maybe she should get fairy lights like Regina has on hers. 

"Do you have a date?" Janis murmurs after a couple minutes. 

"Huh?" 

"For homecoming. Are you going with anyone?" 

"Oh," Cady says. "Nobody's asked me. I think we're just going, like, as a friend group."

"That's cool," Janis nods. "It's usually more fun that way." 

"Do you have a date?" Cady asks, looking over at her. 

"Yeah," Janis chuckles. Cady feels her heart squeeze a bit, but she can't figure out why. "Damian and I always go together. Every dance since ninth grade. He always drags me with him. I guess he just wants me to, like... get the 'proper high school experience' or whatever." 

"You don't want to go?" Cady asks sadly. 

"It's not the same for me as it is for you," Janis says quietly. 

"What do you mean?" 

"You're popular. You have a friend group," Janis says. "Everyone at school knows who you are, for a good reason. Everyone at school knows who I am for a bad reason. It's not that I don't want to go, or that he's not a good date, but... I only go with Damian because he's the only option I have. I don't have any other friends I can go with, or... an actual date I could ask." 

"Oh," Cady says. "I'm sorry." 

"It's fine," Janis says. "Damian always makes it fun. I'll have a good time. Don't worry."

"You could come with us, I'm sure," Cady offers. Janis laughs outright at that. Why is that funny? 

"Really not an option," she chuckles sardonically. "But thanks for the offer." 

"Why not?"

"I'm sure Regina's already given you some version of what happened," Janis says softly. "Just... not possible." 

Cady gets the sense that she shouldn't push here, so she just nods sadly. Janis gives her a sad smile in return and gently takes her hand. 

"I promise I'll have fun even if I can't go with you. For your sake, I'll have fun," she promises. Cady giggles and squeezes her hand. 

"I'm holding you to that, Sarkisian." 

"I always keep my promises."

"Good," Cady grins. "Can I ask you something?"

"Maybe," Janis chuckles. 

"Is Damian, um..." Cady says, pausing awkwardly. "Gay?" 

Janis laughs again, much harder this time. "Yes. He's almost too gay to function. You really couldn't tell?" 

"I mean, kinda, but I don't like assuming things," Cady says in embarrassment. She decides to leave out the part about her friends telling her a good bit of Janis and Damian's life story within a few days of meeting them. Something tells her that wouldn't go over very well. Janis nods. 

"That's good, though. And for future reference, Damian is very very gay. But if you want to know about anyone else you should probably ask them directly. It's... the kind of story someone should only tell for themselves, you know?" 

Cady nods eagerly. "Got it." 

"Tits. I'll see you Monday," Janis grins, zipping her backpack shut and standing up. 

Cady's sad she has to go. She wonders what kinds of things Janis would pick to wear to homecoming. Wonders what going shopping with her would be like. 

"Bye. Have a good weekend," Cady says before she can beg her to stay. Janis waves and is out Cady's bedroom door. Cady waves back and heads over to the mirror to make sure her makeup is perfect. Regina said that if even a single eyelash is out of place it ruins the image of their whole group. 

With another coat of mascara she thinks she looks perfect enough for even Regina's standards. She rushes out, trying not to break an ankle on her ridiculously high heels, when she hears Regina laying on the horn outside. She's lucky her neighbors haven't filed a complaint yet. 

"Hi," she says breathlessly as she takes her usual spot in the backseat. 

"Hey," all three of her friends say at the same time. 

"Are you excited, Cady?" Gretchen asks. Cady nods.

"Yeah! I never really wore dresses until I met you guys, I'm excited to get something more... snazzy. I've never had much reason to dress up super fancy before," she says. 

"It's so fun, you'll love homecoming shopping," Karen says. 

"Shopping with you guys is always fun," Cady grins. "I hope I find something."

"Oh, you will," Regina chuckles, almost ominously. 

—-

Cady was expecting to go to the mall again, but apparently dress shopping at the mall is a total fashion faux pas. She looks around at the fancy dress store she's found herself in. They have everything from homecoming dresses to wedding dresses, and most of them seem very far out of her budget. 

Her friends head over to the racks of homecoming outfits in their sizes and start grabbing just about everything they can see. Cady is confused by the tulle tornadoes rushing around her, but she shrugs and follows suit as best she can. 

Once they all have a decent stack of potential dresses, they make their way over towards the changing rooms. One of the stacks of dresses asks, "Who goes first?" 

"Me," another responds, so the other three all waddle over to the benches and plop down. Cady looks to either side now that the dresses aren't covering their faces and sees Karen is the one missing.

They all wait until the curtain opens and Karen comes back out, clad in a bright pink two piece dress. The top has a sort of criss-cross hem, and the skirt falls just above her knee. 

She does a twirl so her friends can see the dress in all of its glory. They all hem and haw over it, showering her in rightfully deserved compliments. 

The process is repeated for about six more dresses, until Karen reaches the last one she grabbed. 

"Which one?" Karen asks, still wearing the last one.

"I think the first one, honestly," Gretchen says. "That one really suited you." 

"Not this one. Makes you look like a cheap slut," Regina says like that's a completely normal thing to say. "Definitely go for the first one." 

Karen nods sadly and goes back into the changing room. She returns in the original bubblegum pink dress just to make super sure this is the one she should choose. Everyone eagerly confirms it, so she changes back into her regular clothes and switches places with Gretchen. 

Cady blinks through dress after dress after dress Gretchen tries on. She compliments every one, because Gretchen does genuinely look great in all of them. 

She's more indecisive than Karen was. Cady thinks she will be too. So many choices. How are you meant to know which one is correct? 

Each of them had a favorite dress that Gretchen tried on, so she goes back to try those three on again. When she has the last one on, she whines an, "I just don't know!" 

"We could all wear pink dresses," Karen offers. "Crown emoji. Then we're, like, matching, but not matching enough to be totally cringe, teeth emoji." 

Was that English?  Cady asks herself desperately as Regina and Gretchen mull that over. Cady decides to pipe up with a, "The pink one did really suit you, Gretchen."

"Really?" Gretchen asks. "It didn't make my stomach too noticeable?"

That's an issue?  Cady wonders. "I didn't think so." 

Gretchen shoots her a thankful smile and goes to try that one yet again. Her friends all nod when she pulls the curtain open and steps out to reveal the tight watermelon pink dress. It has long tulle sleeves, which seems to make Gretchen a bit more comfortable in it as well. 

"You look really pretty, Gretchen," Regina says. Cady and Karen nod in agreement. Gretchen sighs with a smile, the relief visible on her face as her turn is up. "My turn, bitches." 

Cady finds herself bracing as Regina takes her pile of dresses, wondering what circle of hell she's in for now. Regina is always the most demanding when they go shopping. She almost never picks her clothes herself. She leaves that for her lackeys, demanding a certain fashion and quality, and compliments on top of everything. 

Cady's definitely glad she made an exception today. Regina picked all her own dresses to try, so they just get to experience the hurricane of lace and satin they're about to be forced into. 

Hurricane is an understatement. Regina looks fantastic in everything, because of course she does. They quickly run out of compliments to shower her in. Things turn to, "Ooh!" or "Wow!" rather quickly. 

Cady feels like she's woken up from some kind of homecoming coma by the time Regina has tried on the last dress. She shakes her head to clear it when Regina sighs, "So which one?" 

"Uh... that one looks great," Cady says. 

"Yeah, your waist looks, like, so tiny!" Gretchen says eagerly. Karen just nods along like a little bobblehead. 

"Really?" Regina asks haughtily, whipping her blonde hair around to find a mirror. She puts her hands on her hips and does various poses in her fuchsia bodycon dress. 

"The, um... color really brings out your eyes," Cady agrees, trying to sound like she knows what she's talking about. Gretchen and Karen both nod again. "And your... hair." 

Regina looks at the mirror with a thoughtful pout on her face. "Eh, as long as guys are staring at me."

Oh, definitely, Cady thinks to herself. It's oddly reminiscent of the time she watched a snake eat a cow. The snake has more sequins than the one in Kenya did, though. Wait, is that rude?

"Your turn, Cades," Regina says with a wink. She heads to change back into her (arguably fancier) normal clothes, so Cady gathers her mound of dresses. 

"I don't have many pink ones," Cady says anxiously. Gretchen and Karen both take the ones that aren't at least pink-adjacent and give her the ones they have, since they're all close enough to the same size to get away with it. Cady is significantly shorter than the rest of them, but she thinks she'll be able to pull it off with a bit of tailoring if she needs to. 

The first dress she tries is awful. The material is glittery, and it has long sleeves. So itchy. It's so tight Cady can't even reach far enough behind her to zip it up all the way. She settles for zipping it as much as she can and just holding the neckline at the top for the same effect. 

"It's nice!" her friends say when she kicks the curtain open enough to wiggle through and show them. 

"It's really uncomfortable," Cady says, wiggling in a ditch attempt to get the itchy fabric off her skin. 

"Pick a different one, then. Can't have you squirming like you're about to piss yourself the whole night," Regina sighs, waving her back into the changing room. 

Cady can't quite hide how relieved she is as she turns around and practically rips the dress off her body. She stands there in her underwear for a split second to recover from the awful fabric before she grabs the next dress. 

The next few go about the same way, made of too-tight uncomfortable materials that Cady can hardly bear having on her body. Pink is also a tricky color for her to wear with her hair and complexion, so some of the shades simply don't suit her. All this makes for an... interesting homecoming dress shopping experience, to say the very least. 

She's down to the last four or so and getting more and more worried. What if she can't find anything? What will Regina do to her?

The next one she tries on is a tight strappy contraption and turns out to be so complicated that Cady gets tangled in the wrong parts of it for a solid three minutes. She takes it off without even showing her friends and places it firmly in the no pile. 

But the next one has promise.

She can get into it herself, which is a plus. She can even do the zipper up all the way. It's not saying much, since there's not much zipper in the first place, but it definitely helps. 

"This one, I don't even need to see the rest," Regina says when Cady pulls the curtain open to show it off. 

"Really?" Cady grins. All three of them nod eagerly and practically shove her over to the mirror so she can see for herself. Cady looks at herself, spinning from side to side to observe the dress from all angles. She does look beautiful. 

It's a baby pink, one that actually brings out the red of her hair in a nice way, with small gold sequins scattered around. The bodice is tight and dips into her cleavage in a way she's not the most comfortable with, but she decides she's into it. Her back is almost totally bare, so she'll have to figure something out in terms of a bra that won't show, but that's manageable. The skirt flares out and falls to just above her knee. She shakes her hips the slightest bit, and the swish factor is excellent. 

"I like it," Cady nods. "Are we done?" 

"No, it's time for shoes!" Gretchen squeals. 

Ah, hell.

—————

Aaron turns to look at her when she takes her seat behind him on Monday. "Hey."

"Hey," Cady grins. "How was your weekend?" 

"Not bad, not bad. My dad made me spend most of it at a football workshop thing, but it was less tedious than most of them are," Aaron replies. "How about you?"

"Oh, mine was pretty good too. I didn't really do much," Cady says, trying to find an appropriate amount of time to stare into his eyes. So shiny. 

"Uneventful weekends are always the best," Aaron says. Cady giggles and nods. 

"Definitely." 

Aaron chuckles as well. Cady can't help but smile at the sound. "So are you going to homecoming?"

"Yeah, Regina and Gretchen and Karen and I are all going together. Just, like, as friends," Cady says. "Are you?" Please say no, please say no. 

"Yeah," Aaron nods, flipping his swoopy hair out of his eyes. Cady tries not to swoon. "Couple buddies of mine couldn't land any dates, so we're just going as a group too." 

"That's cool," Cady says, squealing internally. He doesn't have a date. "I hope I see you."

"I'll save you a dance if you save one for me," Aaron says with a wink. Cady flushes bright pink and nods eagerly. 

"I will."

"Cool," Aaron grins. Cady tries to stop blushing enough to grin back. 

"Cool," she squeaks.

—————

Janis and Cady agree to push their weekly tutoring session back a week. They've decided to spend twice as long the next Saturday working to make up for it. 

Which means Cady has all day on Saturday to get ready for the dance. 

The dance starts at eight, but Cady's been instructed to be at Regina's house by eleven in the morning at the absolute latest. Apparently getting hot is an all day affair. 

Cady's knocking on the door at 10:45 just to be safe. Mrs. George pulls it open and practically drags Cady along with it. Cady stumbles into the house and gives Mrs. George her usual hug. "I like your tracksuit today, Mrs. Sabrina." 

"You do? Oh, thank you, honey! You're just the sweetest thing," Mrs. George replies. Cady's heart breaks the slightest bit at her eager response to a pretty basic compliment. "Well, I won't keep you too long. Regina's in her room getting everything set up for you guys."

"Thanks," Cady says, lugging her garment bag up the stairs and knocking on Regina's door. 

"What?!" a voice yells from inside. "Kylie, I swear to god!"

"It's Cady!" Cady calls back. 

"Oh," the voice says, quieter. The door opens in front of her, revealing a clearly tense Regina. "You don't have to knock, you know."

"Sorry. I didn't want to, like, barge in or anything. I didn't know if you were getting dressed or something," Cady says sheepishly. 

"Not like it matters. Not like you're some kind of lesbo," Regina shrugs. "Anyway, are you hungry? You should eat now so you won't later and look all bloated in your dress." 

"Oh, um... I guess I could go for some breakfast," Cady says, trying to seem casual about it. She actually hasn't eaten yet, so she's starving. But seeming too interested in eating isn't a good look. "If it's not too much trouble." 

"Yeah, whatever," Regina says. Cady winces as she suddenly shrieks at the top of her lungs. "Mommy!" 

Mrs. George is at the door in record time, slamming it open and stumbling into the room. "What's the matter? Ear piercing incident? Herpes?" 

What kind of family is this? Cady thinks desperately. Regina turns and looks at her mother with that sickly sweet grin Cady has gotten very used to being on the receiving end of. 

"Is there any breakfast left? Cady needs some," Regina coos. Her voice is almost unnaturally high, like she's talking to a young baby and not... her own mother. 

"Oh, of course! Let me whip something up really quick, I'll be right back!" 

"Thank you!" Cady calls as she goes running from the room at the same speed. "So... why do we have to be here so early?" 

"Because we need time to wash and style your hair, do all the skincare we need, do makeup, and last minute touch ups and hemming to our dresses, duh," Regina says. 

"Oh. I didn't think it was that involved," Cady says anxiously. 

"It takes work to look this good, Cady," Regina says. "If we aren't the hottest bitches at the dance, do you have any idea what would happen?" 

We wouldn't be the hottest bitches at the dance, Cady thinks immediately. Out loud, she just says, "Oh." 

"Once Gretch and K get here we can get started," Regina sighs, already primping in the mirror. She already has makeup on, even though her bed hasn't even been made yet. Cady wonders if anyone has ever actually seen her without makeup. "Lazy bitches."

"I'm sure they'll be here soon," Cady replies, almost defensively. 

"They'd better be," Regina huffs. "Where is my mom-"

"I can wait!" Cady interrupts as she sees Regina prepare to shout again. "It's totally fine. I, uh... have a quick metabolism. I shouldn't look too bloated in the dress." 

"I have a spare corset if you need one," Regina says. 

"We'll see," Cady replies. 

—-

Gretchen and Karen arrive about fifteen minutes later, rapidly trailed into the room by Mrs. George returning with Cady's plate. French toast and some mixed fruit.

"Thank you, Mrs. George," Cady says. 

"Oh, of course, honey! If you girls need anything you just let me know, okay?" 

"Okay, Mommy, out!" Regina says desperately. Mrs. George's face falls the slightest bit before she nods and backs out of the room, shutting the door behind her. 

Cady eats her breakfast while Regina starts washing Gretchen and Karen's hair in her shower. Karen comes out first, a shower cap over her hair and some green goop on her face. Gretchen follows after another few minutes, just as Cady is swallowing her last strawberry. 

"So have you seen any guys you think are cute, Cady?" is how Gretchen chooses to open a conversation. 

"What? Uh..." Cady stutters. "There's this guy in my calculus class, he's really cute. Aaron Samuels?" 

Gretchen makes some sort of squawking noise oddly reminiscent of some of the birds Cady got acquainted with in Kenya. "What?! No!"

"What do you mean?"

"Aaron is Regina's ex-boyfriend!" Gretchen says in shock. No. No, no, no! "He just broke up with her this summer."

"I thought she dumped him for Shane Oman," Karen pipes up absentmindedly. Cady feels her core go cold just at the mention of his name. Great taste, there, Regina. 

"Irregardless," Gretchen huffs. "Exes are off limits to friends. That's just, like, the rules of feminism!" 

"Um... okay," Cady says in confusion. No more talking about Aaron in public, got it. 

"Oh, but don't worry. I'll never tell Regina what you said," Gretchen says. "I'm great at keeping secrets. Like, Karen and I are dating and we haven't told anyone!"

"Gretchen!" Karen yelps. Cady's eyes go wide as Gretchen claps her hands over her mouth. 

"Hey, it's okay," Cady soothes as Gretchen's eyes well with tears. "I won't tell anyone, I promise. Secret for a secret. I'm happy for you guys." 

"Really?" Gretchen asks, her voice wobbling. 

"Yeah, of course. I wouldn't do anything like that," Cady promises. "Your secret is safe with me." 

"Thank you," Karen murmurs as she pulls Gretchen into a hug to comfort her, carefully, so the stuff on their faces doesn't smear. 

"Cady! Come on, your turn!" Regina yells from the bathroom. Cady hops up and runs in, leaving Gretchen and Karen to have a moment to themselves. "Bend over."

"Huh?" 

"Did I stutter? Bend over. We gotta wash your hair," Regina huffs. 

"Oh," Cady says. She takes her hair out of the ponytail she had it in and shakes out her curls before she bends over Regina's very nice bathtub. Regina sets the water on and makes sure it's warm, checking it with her hand before she turns it on Cady and starts hosing her down. Cady flinches as the water hits her scalp and starts running down her auburn hair. "Ack." 

"Sorry," Regina says, not sounding sorry in the slightest. "Your hair is really soft."

"Thanks," Cady says. "It smells nice in here." 

"My shampoo," Regina replies. That explains it. 

Regina massages some into Cady's roots and leaves it for a few minutes before rinsing it out, once again with absolutely no warning. She follows it with something in a tub Cady can't read from this angle, raking it through the ends and harshly ripping apart a few tangles. Cady winces and tries not to say anything at the tearing sound of her hair or the harsh pulling at her scalp. Beauty is pain. 

Regina is quick if she's anything. Cady can't have been in for more than two minutes before Regina is twisting her hair around itself, clipping it to the top of her head, and covering the lot in a shower cap. "Hair mask. Holds in the moisture." 

"Cool," Cady says. Regina snorts. 

"Sure. Alright, over here," she says, beckoning her to the sink. Cady looks in the very well-lit mirror and carefully adjusts the shower cap on her head. "Avocado or melon?"

"Hm? Um... melon, I guess," Cady says, thinking she's talking about a snack. She jumps as Regina approaches her face with some pink goop on a silicone brush. 

"What? It's just a face mask, it's not gonna bite you," Regina huffs. 

"Oh," Cady says. "Sorry, I've just never done one before." 

"Oh yeah," Regina says. "It'll make your skin softer. Makeup will go on smoother, blah blah blah. It's an important step. Now don't talk."

Cady listens, shutting her mouth firmly and allowing Regina to brush it over her face. She shuts her eyes when prompted and feels Regina brush more onto her forehead. 

"Okay, you're set. Tell Karen to come do me," Regina says, rinsing the brush off under the tap and screwing the lid back on the face mask. 

"Okay," Cady nods. She heads back out to the bedroom. Gretchen and Karen practically leap apart and put a sensible amount of distance between them. "Sorry, just me. Oh, and Regina wants you to help with her hair and stuff, Karen." 

Gretchen looked like she was about to stand when Cady mentioned Regina wanting someone, and her face falls when she says Karen's name. Karen just shrugs and heads into the bathroom, so Cady takes her spot sitting on Regina's bed. 

"Did Regina seem mad at me?" Gretchen asks as soon as Cady hits the mattress. "I'm always the one who does her hair."

"I don't think so. She's probably just stressed about today," Cady says, trying to comfort her. "I mean, you haven't done anything to upset her. I don't see why she'd be mad at you." 

"It's always something I miss," Gretchen says anxiously. "I'll just buy her something nice."

"I really don't think you have to. And you shouldn't have to, she's your friend," Cady says sadly. "Just try not to worry about it, tonight should be fun." 

"Okay," Gretchen says, her voice a mere squeak. "Yeah, okay." 

Cady gently squeezes her shoulder. "I got your back either way. I'll talk to her if she is mad, you don't have to worry." 

"Thanks, Cady," Gretchen says with a smile. 

"Of course." 

They both jump when Regina slams the bathroom door open and comes strutting out to the bedroom. Karen follows rapidly, returning to her perch on the bed. 

They all jump yet again when Regina's mother suddenly slams the other door open, rushing in with a pink book in one hand and a cocktail in the other. It's eleven thirty in the morning. 

"Regina, baby, before I forget! Look at what I found in the back of your closet the other day," she squeals, doing a weird mix between a dance and a walk over to her daughter. 

"Why were you in my closet?" Regina demands. 

"I was just admiring your dress," her mother says. "Keeps me young. Anyway, I found your... Burn Book!" 

"No way!" Gretchen and Karen squeal. They both rush up to gently take the book from her hand and start flipping through it. 

"Oh, Cady, this was just the funniest thing they did a few ye-"

"Out, Mom!" Regina insists, pointing to the door.

"You got it, baby! Have fun, let me know if you-" Mrs. George says as she scurries back to the door. Regina glares at her, so she jumps straight to a, "Bye." and shuts the door behind her. 

"Cady, come look," Karen says, beckoning her over with a wave. 

"We cut out people's pictures from the yearbook and wrote in comments," Gretchen says. They flip to the first page. "Trang Pak is a grotsky little beeyotch."

Cady's met Trang Pak. They have history class together and she's on the junior varsity cheer squad. She doesn't know what grotsky or beeyotch mean, but it doesn't sound like anything good. Cady frowns. Trang doesn't speak all that much English, but she's really nice. 

"Still true," Regina titters as she's doing something to her eyebrows at her vanity. Gretchen flips to the next page. 

"Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin."

"Still half true." 

Cady knows Dawn, too. Dawn is one of her bases in cheer, and she's always nice to her. She's frowning and thinking so hard she almost misses them reading the next page. "Janis Sarkisian, space dyke. Oh my god, I forgot about that!" 

Almost. 

Cady feels her heart skip a beat. What does that mean? 

"Who's that?" Karen asks, pointing to the page. Cady takes the excuse to peek over their shoulders at the photo. 

It's Janis a few years younger, maybe a freshman. Her hair is much blonder, less of the roots having grown in. She's also wearing what Cady recognizes as her infamous army jacket. Janis said she had been working on painting it for a few years, and she can see it as a work in progress in the photo. She has her arm around Damian, smiling at the camera, but Janis' eyes are... empty, almost. 

"That's that kid Damian, remember?" Gretchen says. "He's one of Cady's bases." 

"Yeah, he's almost too gay to function," Cady laughs affectionately, quoting what Janis told her a few weeks ago. She loves Damian. 

Regina whirls around in her chair. "That's really funny." 

"Oh, I didn't mean that in a bad way, I-"

"No, put that in," Gretchen insists, handing over the book. Regina passes her a Sharpie, so Cady hesitantly scrawls the comment with an arrow pointing to Damian. "Oh, and put in that stuff about Ms. Norbury, too! I'll get her picture. The Book is great for venting."

"Karen, we should rinse you out now," Regina says. Karen scrambles to her feet with a nod and runs to the bathroom while Gretchen cuts Ms. Norbury's photo out of the yearbook. 

The moment is over, but Cady stares at the drying ink in the book. She tries not to think too hard about what she's done as she closes it and rests it on the velvet seat at the foot of Regina's bed. 

—-

Before Cady totally knows what's happened, her hair is rinsed and brushed and braided up and her face mask is cleaned off and she's being patted dry with cushy towels. 

"How do you want your makeup?" Regina asks as she dabs some preparatory skincare onto Cady's face.

Cady thinks for a second. Aaron dated Regina at some point. Some point recently. Maybe Regina is the kind of girl he likes. She can't be with him directly, but nothing says she can't try. "I dunno, like yours?" 

"Gotcha," Regina says. Cady braces for another whirlwind as Regina taps varying products over her cheeks and swipes blush on with itchy brushes and puts on more layers of eyeshadow than Cady thinks an average girl would apply in her lifetime. 

Within an hour, she's done, and her spot is vacated to make room for Karen. Gretchen gasps when she gets a good look at her in full glamorous makeup for the first time. "Oh, Cady, you look so pretty!"

"Thanks," Cady smiles. "Is it supposed to itch this much?" 

"Yeah, just don't scratch," Gretchen chuckles. "Look." 

She grabs a handheld mirror from Regina's vanity and holds it out so Cady can check herself out without being in anyone's way. Cady takes it and turns her head from side to side to see herself. 

It's almost reminiscent of her cheerleading makeup, with less blue and other bright colors. Her eyeshadow is gold to match the sequins on her dress. It's packed on so thick Cady can't really open her eyes all the way, which apparently makes her look sexier. Somehow. 

Again, her freckles are totally covered, packed away beneath a thick layer of foundation. Light bronzer makes her look less dead, and blush gives her cheeks an admittedly adorable rosiness. The lipstick is natural looking, which Cady is thankful for. Her lips but better, as Regina explained. 

Her look is very similar to all three of her friends', which Cady supposes really solidifies their whole group motif situation. They look nice, even if they all do look like clones of each other. 

Regina is more okay with her mother taking pictures of them this time. Cady thinks she understands the point of dances now that she's all decked out in her fancy makeup and pretty dress. 

"Look at those fly bitches!" Mrs. George coos as she snaps an unfathomable amount of pictures in just a few seconds. "Oh, you girls look so beautiful!" 

"Thanks, Mrs. George," Gretchen, Karen and Cady all say. Regina just smiles the slightest bit wider in response. 

"Just one more!" Mrs. George says. "Okay, I'll let you go. Cady, honey, do your parents have Facebook? Instagram? Marco Polo?" 

"Uh... I don't think so. But I can give you their phone numbers," Cady replies. 

"That'll work," Mrs. George nods eagerly. She hands over her sequined-cased phone that's almost too big for Cady to hold and lets her enter her parents' numbers. "I'll get those sent off. You girls have fun! And remember to use protection!"

"Mom!" Regina groans. "Bye!"

"Bye!"

"We got a limo?" Cady asks in awe as Regina pulls open the door to the fancy vehicle. 

"You picked the right lunch table, Cady," Regina smirks. 

————-

"Whoa," Cady says when they step into the school. The theme for homecoming this year is loosely based on a casino. One of the PTA parents is working a 'bar' and serving up alcohol free cocktails, with others working blackjack tables and other 'gambling' events. 

"Good evening, ladies, would you care for some gambling money?" Principal Duvall greets, offering little goody bags of Monopoly money and poker chips so they can participate in the events. 

"No, thanks," Regina hums haughtily before any of the others can speak up. They walk further in, making their way to the gym where the main dance is set up. "I'll never understand why they come up with those bullshit themes. People are here to dance and find people to hook up with, not for a cheap impersonation of Vegas." 

"Yeah," Gretchen scoffs. She listens for a second before she squeals, "Oh my god, it's our song!" 

Someone grabs Cady's hand and hauls her towards the dance floor, so Cady runs along so she doesn't roll an ankle on these absurdly high heels.

She's surprised to see Regina dancing too. Regina said she only dances to slow songs so she doesn't sweat. Maybe one song is okay for her. 

Cady doesn't know how she should dance. She danced to the music the people in the villages played in Kenya, or whatever her parents managed to get their hands on in terms of CD's. But the only people around for hundreds of miles back then were her parents and a few isolated villagers, and they're much less judgmental than American high schoolers. 

She tries her best to follow along with her friends' movements. Before she knows it, the song is done. She's slightly out of breath, but she's having fun. 

"Alright, I'm gonna go sit down," Regina says. "Later, bitches." 

"I'm gonna go too, but I'll find you guys in a minute, okay?" Cady asks. 

"Yeah, of course!" Karen says. "Have fun."

"You too! You guys deserve it," Cady says. "I'll be back."

Cady goes to lean against the nearby wall and people watch. For the budget they have, the school is remarkably well decorated. Lots of red streamers and gold confetti scattered around. Cady takes a moment to breathe and try to get used to the thumping bass and blaring music playing through the loudspeakers. The lights are both too dark and too bright at the same time, and Cady's already totally overwhelmed by it all. And her feet already hurt in her shoes.

She screams the slightest bit when someone slides up next to her with a, "Hey."

"Aah! Oh, Aaron! Hi!" she says. "You look so nice!" Hold me 'til the pain goes away, pleasepleaseplease. 

"You do too. This dress looks amazing on you," Aaron replies, looking Cady up and down with a small smile. 

"Thank you," Cady replies. "How are your friends?"

"I dunno, they all abandoned me as soon as we got here," Aaron says, leaning against the wall next to her with a small but adorable pout. 

"That's rude," Cady frowns. "They shouldn't just ditch you like that."

"Nah, they're fine. I get to do my own thing this way," Aaron shrugs. "Like come talk to you." 

"Then I'm glad they ditched you," Cady grins, turning her head to look at him. "God, these shoes are the worst!" 

"They look painful," Aaron acknowledges with a grimace. "I thought you looked taller."

"Four inches taller," Cady grumbles, rubbing the ball of her sore foot. "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry. I never understood why girls wear those," Aaron says with a shake of his head. "Probably best to keep them on, though, god knows what's gonna be on this floor tonight."

"Ew," Cady whimpers. "Thanks for the tip, though."

"Anytime," Aaron chuckles. "Hey, uh... do you wanna dance?" he asks, offering her a hand. Cady grins and smooths down the skirt of her dress before she takes it.

"I would love to." 

Aaron leads her out to the dance floor. Cady wishes she'd had the foresight to request a slow song, but she'll take the upbeat poppy one playing if it means she gets to dance with the boy of her dreams. 

Dancing is a bit of a loose descriptor. They're actually just jumping up and down to the beat of the song, or as close to it as they can be fussed to get. Their hands are still linked, and Cady boldly shifts to twine their fingers together. Aaron pulls her hand to his lips and kisses her knuckles, making Cady blush furiously beneath her wide smile. 

They both deflate a bit when the song ends, pausing their dancing and looking at each other. 

"Can I tell you something?" Cady murmurs. 

"Yeah, of course. Anything," Aaron replies gently. "What is it?" 

"I really-"

"What?!" Aaron yells as another song picks up. Cady sighs. Maybe now isn't the right time. 

"Never mind," she says. "I'm gonna go get a drink, do you want anything?"

"Nah, thanks. I'll be here!" Aaron says, starting to dance like a madman once again. Cady giggles at his antics and heads over to the drinks table. 

"I wouldn't drink that," a voice says as she pours herself a cup of punch. Cady whirls around in shock, and smiles when she sees Janis. "Already been spiked. Stick with water if you don't want a wilder night than I think you're expecting." 

"Thanks," Cady replies with a grateful smile, leaving the cup on the table for someone who wants a buzz to take. Janis nods, but when Cady looks up after pouring herself some water, she's gone. 

She finds out why when Regina is there instead. "Why were you talking to her?" 

"I wasn't, she was here when I got here," Cady says. "I think she spiked the punch with something."

"I wouldn't be surprised," Regina hums, leaning casually against the bleachers. "She's probably planning some big lesbian orgy and trying to get everyone drunk."

"Probably," Cady agrees. It never gets easier, talking about one of the only decent people she knows like that.

"So how're things going with Aaron? I saw you two talking earlier," Regina says, a glint of something in her eye. 

"You're not mad?" Cady asks sheepishly. "I know you... I mean, uh... that he just broke up with you. That must've been hard." 

"Oh my god, of course I'm not mad," Regina says, seeming aghast at the mere suggestion. "I'm, like, totally over him. If you want... I could talk to him for you." 

"You'd do that?" Cady asks. 

"Of course! We're friends, aren't we?" 

"Thank you so much, Regina," Cady says, sagging in relief. "Just don't say anything totally embarrassing, please?"

"I gotcha. I'll go right now," Regina hums, pushing off the wall and strutting in Aaron's direction. Cady hastily pours herself another cup of water and chugs it all in one go. 

She tries not to make it too obvious that she's watching them, not wanting to seem like a total creeper. She does give a small, shy wave when both Aaron and Regina look in her direction, but beyond that she doesn't risk anything beyond an occasional glance. 

Cady is confused when they seem to be getting closer together every time she looks their way. 

Her worst fears are realized when she looks up and sees they're no longer there. She looks around the gym, trying to see where they've gone, and finds them on the dance floor. Regina is practically wrapped around Aaron, her arms linked behind his neck and his hands dangerously low on her hips. Regina meets Cady's eyes, a mocking, knowing look in her own before she pulls Aaron down for a kiss. 

Cady blinks back tears that threaten to spill and turns around, dropping her cup behind her. The water splashes onto her shoes, but she doesn't care. All she can think about is getting out. 

She runs out of the gym and out of the building, ending up on a small staircase that's meant to be a fire escape. She leans against the railing and breaks down. 

She should've known. Regina would have never volunteered to do something like that for her without expecting something in return. Without a catch. And what a catch she's gotten. 

Of course Aaron would pick Regina over her. Of course he'd pick the girl he's been with before, the one with experience, the one he knows. The pretty one, the hot one, the tall one, the... everything one. 

Cady is nothing. 

She's not sure how long she's out there, feeling the brisk wind against her bare arms and listening to the birds who have been brave enough to stick around this late into autumn. The one benefit of it being so chilly is that the sky is clearer. 

Cady looks up at it, looking at the billions of stars surrounding her. They're not as comforting, anymore. Now they just make her feel small. Even more insignificant than she already felt. 

It's not like it really matters. She can barely see them through her tears, anyway. 

She about startles out of her skin when the door opens again behind her, whirling around in shock. 

Of course it's Janis. 

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you," she says gently. She heads up next to her, leaning on her elbows against the railing and looking up at the sky with Cady. "Nice night."

"Yeah," Cady sighs, trying to keep the tremble from her voice. 

"You okay?" Janis asks lowly. "I know we don't... know each other all that well, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I just wanted to check, I guess."

"Regina... Regina took Aaron back," Cady sniffs. "She just took him back." 

Janis gasps gently, but it seems almost like that wasn't too surprising to her. "I'm sorry."

Cady doesn't know how to respond. It's not okay. Cady does care, a lot. She really likes Aaron. She is hurt. 

"It's not-not your fault," is what she settles on after a long beat. 

"Need a hug?" Janis murmurs gently. Cady nods, not even bothering to check for people who might see them before she sinks into an embrace with her... friend. She thinks she can call Janis that now. 

If she couldn't before, she definitely can after this. Janis just holds her close, gently but with the occasional squeeze. She doesn't even mention the tears and snot soaking into the shoulder of her very nice blazer. Janis seems totally unbothered by it. Content just to let Cady do what she needs to do. 

"Sorry," Cady sniffles when she pulls back. "I dunno where that came from. I'll get that dry cleaned for you."

"S'alright," Janis shrugs. "Don't worry about it. Hey, um... Damian and I were gonna ditch early and go get waffles, would you... maybe wanna come?" 

That sounds amazing, getting away from the too-loud music and lights that hurt her head. And away from her, most of all. But... 

"I can't," Cady says apologetically. "I'm sorry. I'd really like to, I just... can't... let her win. I can't let her ruin this night for me." 

"Dangerous game," Janis chuckles lowly. Something about it makes the hair on the back of Cady's neck stand up. It's... a warning. "Well, if you're staying, we should fix your makeup."

"Shit, I didn't bring any," Cady realizes. 

"Gimme two seconds," Janis says, hauling the heavy door back open and running inside. Cady waits, getting colder and more confused by the second. 

Janis returns, as promised, with Damian and a large bag of makeup in tow. Damian coos sadly when he sees Cady's tear-stained face. He gently pulls her into a hug and gives her a squeeze before he pulls her back to observe his canvas. 

"Theatre kid," Janis explains when he pulls out some makeup wipes and gets right to work. Cady lets him gently wipe off her ruined makeup and swipe on a quick replacement look. It looks similar enough to what she started with that she doesn't think anyone will be able to tell the difference. 

"Thanks," Cady says with a sniffle. Damian holds up a mirror so she can see herself. She almost likes this look better. The foundation he used is thinner, so her freckles actually show through, and her eyeshadow compliments her eye shape more than the old makeup did. "I love it." 

"Anytime. You sure you don't wanna come with us?" Damian asks. Cady nods.

"Some other time. But you guys have fun," she replies. She jumps as Damian spritzes her with some setting spray, coughing a bit as she accidentally inhales some. 

"Sorry." 

"It's okay," Cady giggles. "Thank you." 

"We gotcha," Janis says with a wink. "Knock 'em dead, Caddy." 

Cady wraps her in another hug, squeezing her so so tightly in thanks. Janis squeezes her back before she turns her around and sends her back into the gym with a pat to her shoulder. 

Cady heads right back to the drinks table and grabs yet another cup of water. She chugs it, making extra sure not to smudge the very nice lipstick Damian applied. 

Cady feels better once the ice cold water is settled in her stomach. She walks over to Gretchen and Karen, who are taking a break from the dancing to sit on the bleachers and people watch. "Hey!" 

"Hey!" they reply, beckoning her over to sit with them. 

"I saw Regina with Aaron," Gretchen says. "Are you okay?"

"Oh my god, of course!" Cady says like it's obvious. I've never been less okay in my life, Gretchen, but thanks. "She must've, like, really wanted him back if she was willing to take him like that. I'm glad they're working their stuff out. Do you guys wanna go dance?" 

"Uh... sure," Karen agrees. She seems to catch on to Cady's odd demeanor more than Gretchen does, but wisely doesn't bring it up. 

Gretchen and Karen follow her back to the dance floor. Both of them squeal when the next song comes on, some upbeat pop song both of them love but Cady doesn't recognize. She dances along anyway. 

She looks over her shoulder at Regina as she holds hands with Gretchen and Karen and dances around. Regina has a challenging look, almost a glare, in her eyes. Waiting to see Cady's response, what she'll do, what she dares to try. 

So Cady just smiles. 

To anyone else watching, it's a friend smiling at a friend. But Cady knows. Regina knows. A smile can be a threat. 

This one says you may have won the battle, but I will win the war. 

A declaration. 

May the best girl win.

————-

hope you enjoyed!!

here's the links to everyone's dresses! the colors aren't exactly what i was envisioning for most of them but the styles are so just bear that in mind :

regina: https://www.lucyinthesky.com/shop/giulia-square-neck-dress-in-pink-sequins

gretchen: https://www.lucyinthesky.com/shop/doe-power-mesh-long-sleeve-dress-in-purple

karen: https://www.elliewilde.com/ellie-wilde/fall-2020/ew22018s

cady: https://www.promgirl.com/shop/dresses/viewitem-PD2420297

have a lovely day!