#like when loki made the conscious decision not to tell tony that he was helping them in sokovia

[woulddieforloki]

Ok but in your fic, which parts of Loki attacking people are you referring to? Because Loki canonically doesn’t just attack people for no reason. In Age of Ultron it was Thor who attacked Tony, and it was you who made Loki do it instead, making Loki the one at fault. I don’t mean to say your fic is bad because I like it but it makes sense that fans would defend Loki in that case.

I'm gonna put it under a cut because I don't think my friend's made it that far and I don't want to spoil it if/when he sees this lol

he "attacked" (assaulted?) Jane after The Dark World when Thor wouldn't tell him what they did with the Aether and then he choked Tony because he was mad in AoU. and like Loki did have a reason but he refuses to communicate with anyone so the Avengers don't know that he had a reason. like, it's hard to guess what reason Loki could possibly have for assaulting Thor's girlfriend two minutes after meeting her, y'know? the Avengers aren't the bad guys for thinking Loki shouldn't assault people 😭

[wrenhyperfixates]

Full Disclosure

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: Thor has always been supportive of his brother’s love life, but Loki won’t tell him that he’s dating you. When Thor won’t stop setting him up on dates, Loki has to move past his fears and confess. Warnings: just a fluff-bomb A/N: Thank you for requesting, my lovely nonny! This is longer than a typical imagine might be because I had so much fun with it (in fact it’s really more of a oneshot, oops). If you wanted something a little shorter, I already had a similar incorrect quote in my drafts that I’ll be posting for you later in the week :)

Disclaimer: Gif not mine 

Sometimes it was hard to have a brother so dense. There were plenty of times during their youth when Loki would try to discuss lessons or ladies with Thor, but never seemed to make any sort of breakthrough. It was only when Loki started dating you that he was glad for it, as it made hiding the blooming relationship much easier. That is, until Thor kept trying to set him up on dates.

“I believe I might shove my brother off a cliff, darling,” Loki whined one afternoon, dramatically flopping on your bed.

“Aww. What did he do now?” you inquired after giving him a small peck on the lips.

“He arranged another date for me, and I was left with the arduous task of cancelling. It is a wonder how he has not noticed how absolutely smitten I am with you, my love.”

He nuzzled into your neck as you cuddled him, breathing in your comforting scent. You bent your head down to place a kiss on the adorable little crinkle between his brows. He relaxed a bit, but you could tell he was still stressed.

“Well, we could always tell him about us,” you suggested as Loki’s frown reappeared. “I mean, almost everyone else on the team figured it out. So I don’t really see why we shouldn’t tell Thor.”

Loki pondered this for a moment. True, the other Avengers were aware of your relationship, save for Steve and Bucky, who were too oblivious to even realize their own feelings for each other. Still, it was different with Thor, his brother, his only family left. He knew how fond of you Thor was, but if he were to oppose to the two of you dating, he had no idea what he’d do.

“My brother can be overbearing. I am not certain that telling him is the best option at present.”

“Ok. If you’re sure that’s all, then we’ll wait.”

He whispered a thank you into your hair as you shifted positions so that now he was spooning you. The whole reason you’d decided to keep the fact you were dating a secret in the first place was to be able to enjoy quiet moments like this. Loki has been worried that his teammates would disapprove and try to split you up. Surprisingly, they were supportive, even if they did engage in some subtle teasing. Though, their knowledge of your relationship made what happened at dinner the next night all the more embarrassing.

You and Loki kept secretly holding hands under the table, earning you some smirks from your teammates who happened to notice. Feeling self-conscious, you broke apart but left your legs touching ever so slightly, just enough to feel the warmth radiating off each other. You must have laughed a little too loudly at something Loki said because, suddenly, Thor got what he thought to be a novel idea.

“You know,” he said, pointing at you and Loki, “I believe you two would make a really cute couple.” As if that weren’t bad enough, he continued in a stage whisper, “You should really ask them out, Loki.”

The God of Mischief turned bright red as you started fidgeting in your seat. Everyone else made eye contact with each other before giving in to a bout of laughter. Thor demanded to know what was so funny, but no one could get any words out. When Tony laughed so hard he fell out of his seat, Loki decided that he’d had enough.

“Brother,” he shouted over the din. “I-well, we have something to tell you.”

“What is it?” he shouted back, still not catching on.

“Maybe we should do this somewhere quieter,” you suggested after a small sigh.

The three of you made your way out of the noisy dining room, and Loki started wringing his hands as both his lover and brother looked at him expectantly. This was his moment to finally get the truth out there. Unfortunately, his hands seemed to have a mind of their own and lashed out with a dagger, striking Thor.

“Surprise attack!”

“Loki!” you bellowed, upset with your boyfriend.

“Do not worry, my friend. This is a normal occurrence,” Thor assured you as Loki grabbed your hand and whisked you away.

Once behind closed doors, you fixed him with a withering glare. He knew that he was being ridiculous, especially now that Thor has shown he would be fine with you two dating. But Loki realized something else was stopping from sharing his joy with his brother. If he told Thor, it would be like bridging his old life and his new one. Granted, you already knew of his past misdeeds, but what if there was something else he hasn’t told you? Something long forgotten in his memory that Thor lets slip? In the end, his reluctance all boiled down to a fear of losing you.

“I know, I know. That was not the best route to choose. I just didn’t think it was the right time to say anything,” he lied.

“Why can’t you just be honest with me, Loki?” you pleaded as tears formed in your eyes. “It’s obvious that you’re embarrassed of me or something. The least you could do is tell the truth about it.”

“Oh, my darling,” he cooed, wiping a plump drop that had fallen and made a glistening track halfway down your cheek. “Please understand that my inability to tell my brother of us has nothing to do with you. You are the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me.”

“Then what is it?”

“I fear that you may come to resent me if you hear any more of my past.”

“Loki,” you said, voice heavy with emotion. “Look at me. I know that you’ve done some... questionable things before. But I know you now, and that’s what I care about. We’ve all done things we’re not proud of, but you work harder than anyone I know to make up for it. It’s one of the many reasons that I love you.”

He looked at you with eyes full of gratitude before hugging you close. “I love you too, dearest. Never doubt that.”

The air relaxed around Loki and his beloved as a quiet contemplation settled in. He slowly rocked the two of you back and forth, trying to plan his next move. If there was one thing he didn’t like, it was not knowing what to do next. But he was sure that, with you beside him, he could figure it out.

“Ok,” you said after sucking in a long breath. “We’ll wait then. As long as you need.”

“No,” Loki interjected, coming to a conclusion as you spoke. “I want to tell him now. Well, maybe not right at this moment. But tomorrow for certain.”

After checking that he was sure of this decision, you agreed to have lunch with Thor where you would tell him the news. Loki’s nerves were at an all-time high by noon the next day. He helped you set the table to try to calm them, but nothing seemed to cull his worries.  You came up behind him and wrapped your arms around his waist, pressing kisses to the tense spots between his shoulder blades.

“Hey, it’s going to be alright. I promise,” you reassured him, hoping to relieve some of the pressure he was feeling.

He relaxed in your embrace for a second before you broke away upon hearing Thor’s heavy footsteps approaching. Loki tweaked the utensils once more, and you pressed a quick kiss to his knuckles in a final act of comfort. It also helped some that Thor seemed to be in an even more jovial mood than usual. Which, of course, was saying something as the god was relentlessly optimistic.

Sitting down, he greeted you both by name and told you everything smelled delicious. The God of Thunder bit his lip to hold back a smile, but you and Loki could see it tugging its way onto his face. The two of you shared a look, attempting to figure out what exactly was the cause of such joy for the older Odinson boy.

“Um, Thor?” you said. “Is there something you wanted to share with us?”

“No. Is there something you want to share with me?”

Another look passed between you and Loki. Suddenly, Loki realized that his brother must know the news you were about to share. It figures that after all this time, he worked it out moments before he was about to come clean.

“You have figured it out,” Loki sighed, “haven’t you?”

Thor nodded eagerly and came around the table to hug his brother and friend, overjoyed that they were dating. He loosened his grip around you upon hearing your gasping voice telling him he was hugging too tight, a terrible habit of his.

“But when did you figure it out?” you questioned, puzzling over the timeline of events.

“I have known for months, of course.” He tried to stick to this story, but the skeptical looks from both you and his brother made him abandon his position. “I saw you two being all cuddly just before I came in,” he conceded with slumped shoulders.

All three of you began to laugh, and Loki was surprised by how relieved he felt at not having to actually confess. The rest of the lunch went swimmingly, and the God of Mischief relaxed further, happy to have both his brother and beloved in such high spirits. Unfortunately, his own sunk when Thor offered to tell a story about him. It seemed like his worst fears were about to come true.

“One time when we were children,” Thor began with a wistful look in his eye, “Loki tried to use some of his magic and accidentally turned himself into a cat. He came to my room and pestered me until I brought him to mother. Remember that, brother?”

“Indeed, I do,” Loki said with a nostalgic laugh, feeling relieved that was all Thor shared. “It was one of the first spells I ever tried. I am afraid that I sorely botched it. I was coughing hair balls for weeks.”

“So that’s why you won’t let me get a kitten!” you added with a laugh of your own.

The brothers went back and forth telling embarrassing stories about the other. You refused to share any of your awkward childhood moments, and your companions vowed to get some out of you one day. All in all, Loki had a great time. He squeezed your hand in thanks under the table. With shining eyes he observed you and Thor laughing. He realized that, for the first time in his life, he had nothing to worry about. After all, he’d been wrong when he’d thought Thor was the only family he had left. Now you were his family, too. And nothing could possibly take away you or the love you shared.

[anakinisvaderisanakin]

Tony Stark Is An Emotional Man - My Unpopular(?) Take

So, I’m rewatching the MCU - because of course I am - and I just realized something watching The Avengers for the first time in probably 10 years.

While everyone believes Tony is a prick - and don’t get me wrong, he is 60% attitude in a small package - until he saves the damn planet; the statement he gives to Banner about the Hulk saving him is very heartfelt. He opens up about his own condition with the shrapnel, which is a rare moment of him being openly vulnerable - especially in the earlier phase of the MCU. He is being genuine, and he is trying to make Banner see the positives and understand that perhaps, the situation isn’t as bleak as he’s been thinking.

Tony is trying to provide help, to comfort Banner; not for his own gain but because he recognizes himself in Banner, in spite of their very different ways of handling their inner demons, and their wildly differing personalities. Because he knows what it’s like to lose your way and your self worth, and he wants to see Banner regain some sense of himself the same way he has.

It’s nice to see the kind side to Tony, and for him to expose it willingly to help a fellow team mate - and eventually friend - accept himself and his inner struggle. Tony does not get credit enough for the fact that he always did have that side to him, he just didn’t know how to show it. Even his jokes and snarky sarcasm get less “mean spirited” as he evolves, and grows as a person.

I feel like Iron Man 2 coupled with The Avengers (and of course Iron Man 3 added onto that) are a perfect portrayal of how Tony’s more outward sense of caring for people, despite his awkward sense of socializing, was already beginning to shine through the cracks.

To me, Tony Stark is by far the most compelling character because while I am not entirely like him, I recognize so much of myself and my own hardships. It’s never too late to reinvent yourself, and Tony is the perfect metaphor for that. He even directly likens himself to a phoenix in Iron Man 2, although played for laughs at the Stark Expo.

But not only that, later on in the movie when Steve insinuates that Tony is not a hero, that he would never sacrifice himself on behalf of another; that he fights for himself alone, and tells him he's basically nothing without the suit - you can see it's hurting him. Tony never really holds eye contact unless it's worth while; unless it's getting to him and requires his full attention coming from someone he truly trusts, unless it means something. You see him keep his eyes off of everybody in social situations before he knows them or they have earned his respect; you see him avoiding getting in neck deep, avoiding and brushing off comments on his distant persona.

But that insult right there; from the man his father would rave about, that's taking. You see the pain in his eyes, you see the fact that he's being torn open. You see that he's brought right back to who he once was, reliving the guilt of every mistake he ever made. All because of Steve's judgmental, misguided perception of him. Tony hides his true self; hides his suffering, and his internal grappling with his shame and guilt over every problem and death he's directly or indirectly caused. The fact that Steve Rogers - of all people, as the revered Captain America - cannot see through his surface disguise is really getting to him. I believe Tony had assumed Steve would be superhuman, and he's struck by the realization that Steve is no more human than he himself is. He has imperfections, and flaws, and jumps to conclusions.

And the fact that it is Steve, of all people, making these assumptions of him and taking these jabs at him makes it all the worse. You need only watch for Tony keeping eye contact throughout the verbal onslaught to know it's hitting home; and to know that Tony feels, Tony knows this is what people all initially think of him. He had just hoped that somebody as subjectively righteous and morally good as Steve would have the ability to see through the facade. The fact that he doesn't, and that he doesn't hold back on his opinion, is what hits the hardest.

Another point is when Fury informs the remaining team of Coulson's (faked) death. Tony doesn't look at anyone, he sits turned completely away from the conversation. You can see he's close to losing it, and if he were to speak, if he were to look up, were to make any sort of eye contact directly - he would crack. That's one thing I love about RDJ's portrayal of Tony; the fact that he is so terrified of showing his vulnerable side in front of others, even when he is grieving or blaming himself for any mishap. He feels like he has to be the strong one, like he has to keep it together. Not for himself as much as for everyone else - because if the unfeeling, arrogant Iron Man breaks, how are any of the other team mates going to make it?

If Tony of all people reveals he takes it harder than almost anyone else present, how are they going to see him as the same man? I love how it is only later in the MCU, that he exposes this side of himself more willingly and freely - like in Endgame where he mentions how he lost “the kid” while referring to Peter. He not only maintains eye contact with Steve as he admits that, he chokes up. This same theme is prevalent between them in Civil War when Tony asks Steve to lay down his guard and hand over Bucky, “because it’s us” - which is a testament to the fact that Tony has now accepted Steve as a friend and ally, and this betrayal of his hard earned trust is breaking his heart. But this early on, none of this has become a valid option to him yet. So he keeps it inside; refusing to show his true colours.

And in this moment, what does he do when it gets too much? When he's required to speak up, to acknowledge Fury's mention of The Avengers project? He ups and leaves. Because if he speaks; judging by the eyes alone (which is yet another credit to Robert) he's going to tear up. And hence, he walks out to get it under control, to reil himself back in. It’s a habit he throughout the franchise will begin to display less and less; as he learns to be more comfortable with the team as friends, as well as openly displaying his own emotions.

We see another side to this later when Steve approaches Tony alone one on one; and Tony initially attempts to make quips about how Coulson shouldn't have gone alone, how he was an outgunned idiot. Steve cuts straight to the core, and Tony snaps. You see him nearly tear up, you see how upset he truly is deep down and how he was only doing his best to play it off the only way he knows how. But as soon as he is spoken to, is forced to make an assessment, to actually talk about it; to look Steve in the eye and defend himself - that's the exposed vulnerability that is the real Tony Stark.

Behind the snarks, behind the facade, behind the charade of the arrogant, nonchalant prick he’s been trying to make the world see him for. He's as human as he could ever be; and I believe this is also the first time Steve notices that there is more to Tony than he had presumed. He too, had assumed Tony is too wrapped up in his own ego and lavish life resume to care for the smaller man. But here, he sees that Tony feels, Tony sympathizes, and Tony is deeply traumatized by the fact that he - as he feels - allowed this to happen. He sees that Tony believes this is on his conscious.

Tony's glassy eyes and emotional turmoil betray him, and even though he jumps right back to his intellect and brains as a safety net and a defense mechanism - addressing Loki's plan to hit them at home and split them apart - this is the first time Steve is exposed to Tony's determination, ability to assess and deduce the situation, as well as his belief in doing the right thing (another theme seen later in Age of Ultron regarding Tony’s creation of Ultron himself, as well as in Civil War where Tony is adamant that the Sokovia Accords are the right path to take to pay for the critical mistake Ultron turned out to be.) And as they assemble, you're struck with the realization that this has been enough of an eye opener for Steve to realize that there is more to Tony Stark than meets the eye.

And who is first to the tower, leading the charge if not Tony?

And despite his blind faith in his own skill and ability to stall Loki just long enough; there's the epitome of the courage Tony possesses. He knows that without the suit, he has no fighting chance. He knows Loki could snap his neck in the blink of an eye. And still, he never backs off. Indeed, there is an underlying death wish or at the very least a sense of him subconsciously feeling he deserves and is fated a grim deminse - but it does take unprecedented bravery to put yourself in such clear danger.

Tony Stark could be called many things; but a coward is not one of them. Sure, he does have the untested suit on hold, but he did not know 100% it was going to work as planned. He was counting on it, but you know a part of him knew it was a long shot and might not work out in the end. The suit could have been faulty, Loki could have cracked his head open; the cavalry could have been running late. Still, Tony gambles with his life and luckily barely comes out on top.

At last, we have the finale. What can be said about it, except the fact that it shows exactly who Tony truly is? He knows he's going to die - indeed he doesn't - but he is intent on that, he is accepting death and welcoming it. If it helps save the world, if it will keep Pepper and everyone he loves, everyone he knows; everyone alive safe.

Here, the decision from the first Iron Man to actually show us Tony's eyes and face behind the mask is a godsend. Seeing as RDJ is an actor who communicates so much of his emotional range with his eyes only; we are given an easy access to see everything Tony is experiencing flash through them. We see the fear, the pain, the uncertainty; the acceptance of the inevitable. We see his eyes convey the jumbled mass of conflicting emotions speeding through his mind, we see how he finally just relents and gives in to what he thinks is going to be his time of dying. His final moments.

And he has made them worthwhile, he has already achieved what Yinsen begged of him in that cave in Afghanistan - he has made his survival count. He has saved numerous lives, and if his death is what it takes - so be it. Cue the parallel to Endgame. Hell, even Age of Ultron has elements of this as previously mentioned; although that one was on Tony himself, and his irrevocable fear and flaws as a human being. However, here the team sees Tony's will to sacrifice himself firsthand, for the first time; and contrary to Steve's initial assessment that Tony would never put his life on the line for anyone but himself - he does just that.

This is what makes this movie so powerful.

Sure, it builds upon every team member’s arc; even Fury's. But it is Tony who proves himself above all; who shows the team what we the audience already knew. That he is a hero, that our past does not define us. That Tony Stark feels, that he knows right from wrong although he's still stumbling blind half the time - just like the rest of us. And it proves to Steve - to the entire team - that he is not merely the selfish, arrogant asshole only sticking up for himself. He is a man, albeit a flawed one, who cares deeply. Who feels, who mourns, who appreciates life and the people around him; and who is - behind the barrier he's placed between himself and everyone else to avoid getting hurt - extremely insecure. He is fearful, apprehensive, sensitive, and well aware of his shortcomings.

And Tony Stark is, first and foremost, a good man.

Repost from my previous blog.

[iluxia]

Unsolicited writing advice???

A ton of you have commented with such kind and complimentary words about my Naruto fic Hiding in the Leaves and its characterization through the shifting POVs. Thank you all! I’m gratified to hear that you’re enjoying it. Some are asking how I shift perspectives and still manage to keep the characters in line. Actually, a fair number of readers have asked for actual advice, so here we go. This is a lot of writing babble, I hope it makes sense but feel free to drop me an ask if anything is unclear! 

(1) I read a lot. I read all the time. Easily a book a day, maybe two days. And when I do, I practice critical reading—or as they say, reading like an editor, so I can pick at techniques other writers use. Writing is an art you learn largely by example. A lot of what I read influences what and how I write, so when I need to change my tone or voice to fit a different character, I usually read something that matches what I want my prose to sound like, on top of using techniques like changing tenses and playing with vocabulary choices. 

I recently had the chance to flex these writing muscles because I went from writing two very distinct human voices (Tony Stark & Stephen Strange) to writing an alien voice (Loki). It was fucking hard; those in the Marvel fandom might know what I mean. Tony and Stephen are both human, born and raised in America, with specific life experiences that inform their daily decisions and personalities. Loki, on the other hand, is an alien: raised in Asgard, stolen from Jotunheim, well-traveled throughout the Nine Realms, and moreover raised as a prince. Just stop and think about that. When your characters do not have the same experiences that you do, they’re bound to not have the same earthbound concerns that you do. Anthropomorphizing non-human (or even non-living) beings is an age-old practice, but to be faithful to his character, I tried my best to twist my writing voice into a different shape—a shape that more befits the prince of a realm that is somewhat humanoid but very different from what we know on Earth. And in order to do that, I did four things: 

I changed my prose from past to present tense; it sounds more immediate and assertive

I read three books, written in present tense, where the prose mimics what I imagine Loki would sound like in his own head

I made a huge spread of everything about Loki (both canon and my own orginal additions) that would inform his motivations, internal concerns, emotional responses, and decision-making processes

I drowned myself in Loki fanwork

Immersion is key! If you saturate your brain in a specific type of rhetoric or style, that’s what’s likeliest to come out of your productive process at the end. So controlling what you read/watch/listen to will help control your writing style too.

 (2) This further breaks down what I just said in the third bullet point above. Before I start writing from a specific character’s perspective, I’ll take the time to brainstorm and build that character from the ground up. This might take a day or two and includes a staggering amount of detail—just as much detail as mine or your life might comprise. Silly little things like favorite colors and foods, hobbies, dislikes. Oftentimes, if you’re a fic writer, this is easier because canon gives it to you. Those amazing wiki-pages exist to make your life easier in this regard. (Bless.) What canon doesn’t give you is where you can dig in. Go deeper. Pin your character down. Think about more serious considerations like emotional triggers, conscious motivations, subconscious motivations, coping and defense mechanisms. When hurt or under stress, are they the type to lash out or curl in? Are they the type to hold on to a grudge, or do they prefer to forgive and forget? Do they get hurt easily or do they have a thick skin? I imagine the character’s relationships in life, I rank them and network them in my head. Who do they run to when they need advice? Who do they like hanging out with when they’re happy? Who annoys them, who inspires them, who scares them, who do they want to be like? Even if these questions aren’t necessarily things you might discuss in your fic, it helps inform this person you’re writing about, so it helps you keep a clearer and more consistent mental picture of them as you go.

But most critical of all, I sit and imagine myself in their shoes and think of how they perceive themselves. That is a major factor when writing, because that’s what their head-voice will sound like. And if the story is written from their perspective, then that means you, writer, are writing in that head-voice!

Here’s a more HITL-specific example (I’ll try not to spoil too much lol):

Sasuke

How he sees himself:

Ordinary; not very impressive as a shinobi, but not absolutely terrible either – just ordinary

Average looking

A slow, impatient learner

Awkward with people, but polite and with good intentions

Emotionally stable

A good reader and listener

How he actually is from someone else’s POV:

Incredibly skilled for his age and level as a shinobi

Actually quite handsome

An intuitive learner, very tenacious and will keep at a task forever until he gets it just right; perfectionist much

Quiet, polite, notices a lot about how others act

Absolutely does not handle emotions well

Selective listener; sometimes only hears what he wants to hear

Rationales:

He’s surrounded by a clan of perfectionists and overachievers who constantly laud his aniki for being a genius while paying him no attention. Of course he thinks he’s ordinary.

No one ever compliments him for his looks in the clan compound, and what he sees in the mirror looks just like a younger version of everyone around him. Of course he thinks he’s average, even though he actually has looks.

Because he’s largely self-taught (except for when Obaa-sama teaches him), he thinks he’s slow. (Ever learned a new skill or maybe even a new language by yourself? I have. I can tell you that my perception of how much time I spent learning ‘basics’ was skewed.) He also holds himself to a higher than normal standard because that’s what gets him positive attention (or attention at all) within his family. Add the fact that Itachi was there blazing through everything before him, and it’s suddenly easy to understand why Sasuke thinks the worst of himself as a student. But he (and Naruto) are actually fast learners—we see this even in canon—and both of them boast high levels of natural intuition, or as I (the neuroscientist) likes to call it, pattern recognition. Some people are naturally better at this than others; there have been extensive tests done to show it. But we also know intuition can be trained, so the more Sasuke works at something, the better he gets, and the faster he learns the next skill—as long as the learning is patterned. Which is why Orochimaru, who has picked up on this trait, walks them through learning each jutsu in a stepwise manner every time.

Sasuke doesn’t have a lot of social interaction outside of his family. The Uchiha clan in this fic is very segregated from the rest of the village, so if you’re not active as a shinobi, you probably don’t get out of the compound much. Interacting with people probably intimidates Sasuke a lot so he feels awkward about it and reverts back to habits of politeness and silence that he was taught from childhood. That doesn’t mean that he’s not paying attention, however; Sasuke is naturally observant and remembers a lot about how people act (and not so much what they say). I have a theory about this related to the Sharingan but I won’t go into too much here because it would be a straight-up spoiler, sorry. :D

He thinks he’s emotionally stable because he doesn’t remember many incidents of severe emotional upheaval in his life. That’s because he hasn’t had them; apart from the whole thing with Itachi, he’s been fairly sheltered his whole life. But he actually doesn’t handle emotions well—something he’s about to find out soon enough—and for the same reason! He hasn’t been exposed to an extensive range of it.

Because he’s largely self-taught, he has confidence in his reading skills. He also remembers all of Obaa-sama’s stories so he thinks he’s a good listener. Well, he is—to an extent. If he wants to listen, he will. If he doesn’t, he’s just as proficient as Naruto at pigheadedness. (I think it’s an Uchiha trait too lmao.)

That was a lot, right? But you can see that if I’m writing from Sasuke’s POV, I have to keep a different set of pointers than if I’m writing from Naruto’s POV about Sasuke. The way I think of it is like changing lenses or shades depending on the light outside.

A few more techniques/guidelines I use:

Stay consistent with vocabulary. Orochimaru is far more verbose than the rest of them, Shikamaru right behind him, and Naruto uses shorter, simpler words. You can even assign particular words to a character, a word only they would use when referring to something. This applies to how your character addresses other people too, i.e. Orochimaru calls them ‘little ones’; Shikamaru calls his dad ‘oyaji’ in front of his peers but ‘otou-san’ in front of his sensei; Naruto is quick to give people nicknames and most of the time it sticks.

Watch the adjectives; different people describe things differently. Orochimaru uses more nuanced words that can mean different things depending on the situation and mood; Naruto thinks in terms of emotions, a lot of how does this make me feel; Sasuke is very visual and notices a lot of colors.

Use speech habits wisely; how your character talks should reflect their life. Just like accents, speech habits can tell a lot about a person. Sasuke always speaks politely because it’s how he’s supposed to talk at home, otherwise there’d be trouble. Naruto grew up in a poorer district and had no one to really teach him how to talk politely, so he’s very casual. Shikamaru cusses at age eleven because his parents and family are incredibly laissez-faire and honest around him, so he thinks it’s acceptable and normal (and he was never reprimanded for it).

Play with your tenses. Writing in past tense sounds and feels very different from writing in present tense. Depending on your character, one or the other might sound more appropriate. There are some expressions and figures of speech that sound fine when written in past tense but awkward when written in present tense, so that will end up inadvertently changing your prose a bit, which can be useful.

Read your work out loud. Cardinal rule of prose-writing. What looks good on paper doesn’t always sound good when read out loud. If you read it and it doesn’t sound like how your character talks, time for a vibe check. You might need to change a few words and move sentences around, or you might need a complete overhaul… an editor (and I mean an editor, not just a beta-reader) can usually help you out.

 A note about editors vs beta-readers:

There is a cardinal difference! A beta-reader is usually not professionally trained but should be experienced enough to point out things that aren’t right. In fandom, I’ve found that beta-readers mostly focus on a story’s general feel, flow and readability, sometimes character consistency, sometimes they point out typos and mistakes. An editor goes further than that. I’m fortunate to have Tria (aventria) who has edited my work for, gosh, 14 years now, fuck, we’re old! I call her my editor because when she goes through a piece, she will fix everything and make my draft bleed and I love it. (I actually get a little upset when she doesn’t fix anything, even if that means everything was good.) As an editor, she does a vibe check and looks for typos/errors, yes, but she also critiques the prose extensively. She can rearrange phrases or entire paragraphs for better flow. She will cut out entire scenes or make me rewrite them if they’re that bad. Like a copy editor, she looks at stylistic inconsistencies, grammar errors, and iffy word use. She’ll usually suggest or replace the offending word altogether. She has a lot of freedom with the work and can actually kick a piece to the curb if it’s really that shitty. She also questions plot progression, character development, and the relevance of a scene. (She’s made me cut out many, many scenes.) – That all being said, it’s not easy finding an editor, much less a good one. It also has to be someone you trust to have this much power over your work. It’s worth it, however, and my writing has gotten so much better because of the help.

If you’ve read this far, wow, thanks! You’re also probably thinking, “Shit, she takes this too seriously. It’s just a fic.”

I have… gotten into fights in the past before because of this. I feel strongly about the stuff I write. Just because it’s fanfiction doesn’t mean it isn’t a labor of love. I’m a perfectionist by nature, so that’s why I put so much time and effort into what amounts to ‘just a fic.’ And you know what? At the end of the day, writing it gives me satisfaction and happiness, so I will keep pouring into it as much as I can. It’s just a bonus to hear that other people are enjoying it too. (Yes, I’m one of those weirdos who intensely enjoy reading my own work…)

 Aaand the final point:

(3) I double-majored in psychology for undergrad and have by now accumulated thousands of hours of clinical hours spent using the theories and techniques I learned from those classes on real people. I’m also specializing in neuroscience, so a portion of my time is spent in psychiatry. Characterization was actually not one of my writing strengths at first, but I definitely noticed leaps in improvement after my clinical rotation started. People skills are just that: skills which are honed with practice. It’s amazing how much you learn about how people think and what make them tick when you interact with a whole spectrum of examples: from your neurotypical everyday well-adjusted person, to high-functioning neurotics and obsessives, to patients who have suffered complex stroke syndromes, to encephalitic brains burning under septic fevers, to druggies stoned so high they’ve breached the atmosphere, to patients whose brains are growing insidious tumors, to schizophrenics and catatonics and the depressed. My job also allows me the rare opportunity to interact with people from all walks of life. All I need to do if I wanted insight about how life is for soldiers who served in an active warzone, for example, is to hit up Bill at the ICU and ask for stories about Korea and the Gulf and Vietnam. Or if I wanted to know about how to survive the Rwandan genocide, I could sit down with Amida, who survived it as a barely-teenager with her brother and sister in tow while only “losing my innocence and an eye.” Or I could talk to Heather, who is building a life with her husband and two rambunctious children, for a perspective on the daily concerns and delights of a ‘perfectly normal and ordinary’ working mother. (Her words, not mine; Heather is amazing even if she eats the doctor’s lounge out of Tita Annabel’s cookies.) Anyway, you get my point. When I write, I almost always write about people, so it makes sense that a lot of my inspiration comes from people too. A lot of my original characters—and even some that are not—often speak with the voices and inflections of people I know in real life. You probably have people with interesting stories to tell in your life; you just have to work up the courage to ask and take the time to listen. You’d be surprised at what you learn!

A few helpful writing resources: (most of these are classics)

The Elements of Style by Strunk & White

The First Five Pages by Noah Lukeman

How to Read a Book by Mortimer Adler and Charles van Doren

And more books that helped me get into people’s heads:

Hallucinations by Dr. Oliver Sacks

The Noonday Demon by Andrew Solomon

Far From the Tree by Andrew Solomon

The Lucifer Effect by Philip Zimbardo

Admirable Evasions by Theodore Dalrymple

I hope you got something out of that. Again, feel free to drop me an ask if you have any questions or want to chat!

[sserpente]

A/N: Request from anon. I loved the concept… and then I couldn’t stop writing and it went so well with some other ideas I had and it escalated and ahhh, you guys were supposed to get this Imagine three days ago. Anyway… enjoy reading! ♥ Words: 4628 (oops) Warnings: gore/blood, fluff (the combination doesn’t sound right, now does it)

Here’s an extra warning: I got a bit inspired by “Coriolanus” so there will be a very bloody and graphic scene… stuff I usually don’t write myself. As I said though, I really got inspired by the play so I just went along with it, if anything to not repeat myself with this one scene we all hate so much. It thus also might rip open the wounds Infinity War caused. Therefore, the scene will be marked with “*” at the beginning and the end in case you prefer to skip it.

-

“It’s a myth.”

“It’s not a myth. They are omens of death.” Thor argued. Grinning smugly, he leaned back and took a sip of his beer.

Tony buried his face in his hands. “You know I started believing in many things when you fell out of the sky to help us fight aliens but… there’s a line. ‘Black angels’? With shimmering wings? Please, Point Break.”

“Well, you wouldn’t know. They say only those before their imminent death can see their wings.”

“Have you ever seen an angel then?”

“No! I told you, they are omens of death. Volstagg’s father… he saw one. He swore he did. One week after, he perished.”

“Coincidence.”

Loki rolled his eyes. He had known before that mortals were ignorant and refused to face reality, Stark’s stubbornness however surprised even him. Many creatures shared their stories in the Old Norse myths, stories which his mother had told him before bed when he was a child.

Angels… omens of death. Black, shimmering wings… they said whoever saw one before death, their soul would leave their body contently… that they were of such beauty it would not compare to any other being in the nine realms. As a young boy, Loki had told Frigga he wanted to see one for himself—and Frigga chided him for wishing for such an atrocious thing.

-

Shivering, you wrapped your black coat around yourself tighter. You had bought it from a street market for little money which you had stolen from a peasant. High up in the sky, you were never cold. You were free. Those human sensations were downright irksome.

Perhaps it was your own fault you had ended up on Midgard of all places. Stranded and stripped off most of your powers, they had cast you out and forced you to live a mortal life—knowing you would never find friends on a planet inhabited by beings that would not grow half as old as you.

Perhaps you should have joined your people when they swore their allegiance to the purple titan. But you knew you would have made the wrong decision. What Thanos wanted was impossible—and you sincerely hoped he would fail. His lackeys were already spreading dread, fear and death across the planet. You had seen them lurking about, watching his evil plans unfold and wreak havoc when it was fun.

A high-pitched scream ripped you from your thoughts. Turning straight on your heel to see what had caused it, your instincts kicked in. Altruistically saving humans wasn’t high on your priority list, kicking Thanos’ monkeys’ arse, however, was. It felt good to ram your poisoned dagger into their hearts… and it least gave you some satisfaction.

You frowned when you reached the dimly lit alley, scanning the area to analyse the situation. Somebody had beaten you to it. Clenching your fists, you recognised both Tony Stark and Captain America along with a raven-haired man with a sharp jawline and the most stunning blue eyes you had ever seen—Loki, God of Mischief.

Thanos’ lackeys were nowhere in sight. Instead, what part of the Avengers… and Loki put up with was a dirty burglar who seemed to have tried to rob a young woman who was currently shaking on the cold ground like autumn leaves in the wind.

“Are you alright, Miss?” You heard Steve Rogers ask her humbly, all the while the burglar—terrified for his life—scrambled to his feet, abandoning the knife he had held. Loki rolled his eyes. With but one effortless movement, he kicked him in the stomach the moment he attempted to run and proceeded to grab his collar to lift him off the ground.

“Please, please… please don’t kill me!” The burglar whimpered. You suppressed a chuckle.

“Let him go, Reindeer Games.”

“Let him go? What did we intervene for? Mercy? I disagree…”

“Nope. FRIDAY has already saved his fingerprints and appearance. The police will get him soon enough. Now let him go. I think he peed his pants.”

Loki’s face distorted when he spotted the wet spot between the burglar’s legs. Disgusted, he did as he was told and threw him back to the ground. He swallowed thickly before hurrying away clumsily. Then, he looked up—and his blue eyes locked with yours.

Paralysed, he captured you in his both scrutinising and fascinated gaze. Your lips parted when you realised that he could see your wings. Dark, shimmering and as soft as a crow’s feather dress they framed your form—petite compared to his—and complimented both your (Y/H/C) hair and (Y/E/C) eyes. You were beautiful.

Neither of you paid attention to the young woman who had stood again by now, approaching Loki timidly. Her ‘thank you’ went unnoticed even when Steve called his name.

“Who are you?” You blinked, reluctantly tearing your eyes away from Loki’s to face Tony Stark.

“(Y/N)… my name is (Y/N). I am what other beings would refer to as… a black angel.”

Tony snorted. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

-

One heated discussion after your confession led to another and Captain America and Iron Man—for Loki had remained completely silent—decided to take you back to the compound to speak to Thor. You did not take kindly in spilling your secret to strangers. Hundreds of years ago, humans, Asgardians and other species had hunted you down for amusement, using poison to make your wings visible and cutting them off to sell them on the black market—an ironic name, really.

But this… was different. Loki—the Loki, God of Mischief and Lies, Trickster… son of Laufey and Farbauti and Prince of Asgard—he could see your wings. Legends had been told about connections alike. They said that every living black angel in this universe served a purpose, was meant to follow a path and fulfil its destiny—and to be with one person who loved them dearly for the rest of their existence. Only those that fate chose to be a black angel’s partner would be able to see their wings—to see all of them—in their full glory and true beauty. Loki’s blue eyes were practically glued on you; and if you were not mistaken, there was a hint of panic glistening in his irises too.

Did he feel the connection, perhaps? That you seemed to have found the man your heart would likely belong to for the rest of your life? Strangely enough, you felt… oddly exposed. Only other black angels had ever been able to see your gift, unwillingly sharing it with someone you had but heard of and never met made you vulnerable… and it made you self-conscious.

“How exactly did you end up here on Earth?” Thor leaned forward, crossing his arms on the vast glass table in the middle of the conference room. Around him, the remaining Avengers which you had not officially met yet, squinted suspiciously in a desperate attempt to spot your wings as well. One of them—you believed he was called Rhodey—had even examined your back but found nothing.

“I was… banished. My own people abandoned me because I refused to join the new force.”

“Does that force answer to the name of Thanos by any chance?” Tony tossed in. You nodded.

“You have heard of him. He means to wipe out half of the universe. We have to stop him whatever it takes.”

You could feel Loki’s presence behind you. He was still silent, pacing up and down the room like a cunning predator waiting to strike.

“How do we know we can trust you?”

“You don’t. I am merely warning you. I don’t have the powers to stop him but you might. And I certainly did not ask to be invited to your humble home.” You snapped. They were hostile towards you, you could tell. Something about you unsettled them. If only you knew what it was.

-

Be that as it may, the Avengers decided to let you stay for a while. They hadn’t locked you in a room but if you were to try and leave without anyone accompanying you… then the Norns beware.

You sighed. You should have never mentioned you were a black angel, pretended to be human instead… pretended that Loki was hallucinating. His eyes had made you forget all reason. The invisible force pulling you to him was destructive. You wanted to be close to him, be with him, be there for him… lay your life, soul and heart in his hands… all the while he seemed to painstakingly ignore you.

You barely knew but you could sense that Loki was everything you could ever wish for. An intelligent, powerful, cunning and charming man, tall, blue-eyed and so outrageously handsome he even outshone his brother Thor. You had never spoken to him personally and yet, you felt like you would die for him. Now what if he never reciprocated those feelings? Tragic stories were told about black angels who found love and yet had to live without it.

At the very least, so you figured, you had access to a fully furnished kitchen tonight. It was your first warm supper in two weeks and bit more nourishing than a mere apple or a handful of nuts. It was almost midnight now and hunger had gotten the better of you… or maybe it was the prosperity of food being available to you at any time without you having to steal hard-earned money for it first.

Passing through the hallway, your tread entirely mute, you stopped dead in your tracks when you heard two familiar voices talking in the living room.

“Big… imposing… no, I did not imagine it, Thor. They were there. A pair of shimmering black wings…” Loki sounded worried, yet you could tell he was trying hard not to let it show. He had already seemed to have panicked a little when he first laid his eyes upon you.

“So what do we do?”

“I don’t know.”

“How much time do you have left?”

“I don’t know, Thor.”

“Don’t you… worry, brother… I’m sure everything’s gonna work out fine.”

There was a moment of awfully painful silence. Then, somebody left.

Frowning, you knocked. You were unsure of what they had been talking about. Loki’s expression darkened when he spotted you entering the room shyly, his eyes focused on the wings on your back.

“You… seem to be avoiding me, Loki. Have I… done something?”

Loki smirked—it was bitter. Now that he had told Thor, by tomorrow… they would all know he was going to die soon.

“You have not, dear. It is not something you did. It is your purpose.” Your heart skipped a beat. You had not expected such an honest answer.

“My purpose? I don’t have a purpose here on Midgard.” His eyes were ice cold when he looked up to meet your gaze.

“You are an omen of death.”

Your lips parted. “I am… I am not.”

“No man who sees a black angel’s wings survives. I can see yours.”

“B-but… but that… you’re not going to die.”

His bitter smile returned. “We are facing Thanos. If I was doubtful about my fate before, I am no longer now.”

“Loki, that’s not what it means…” It felt like your heart was shattering, to a million tiny little pieces. He thought you were his death… no wonder he felt uneasy around you. Where had that stupid superstition come from? Why would you be an omen of death?

You longed to tell him what it really meant. Only right now, in this very moment, it did not feel right. Would he even believe you? Probably not.

“Good night, Loki.”

When you returned to your room, you sent your pillow flying through the air all the while suppressing a scream of anger.

-

The following days were equally frustrating. Loki seemed to be avoiding you at all cost and even Thor and the others only spoke to you when it was absolutely necessary. They were scared. All of them. Dreading that at some point, they might see your wings too. You had already given up attempting to explain it to them. There were much more important things to take care of.

Figuring out your own feelings, for example. It was impossible to love someone you had just met, even for black angels… right? The invisible force linking you to Loki’s body and mind was so strong it almost physically ached to not be near him. You were worried. Loki thought he was going to die. It was obvious he had a past with Thanos, one that was about to catch up with him.

You had your dagger—it was the least you could fight with to protect his life. After all, that one superstition was indeed true. Yet when you stood in front of him, the purple titan who had stolen away your people, and the black angels you had thought of as friends and family… you were terrified.

All of them were ready to fight. Man against man, woman against woman and you… somewhere in between. You had never agreed to destroy him, had never promised to help. It was not in your nature to intervene in such things; even though you would not exactly call yourself a pacifist, wars held a bitter connotation. All you cared about was Loki—even if he did not care about you.

Proudly and arrogantly, he lifted his chin in pure defiance. You could feel he was anxious. His heart was beating so fast your own almost stopped. Thanos wanted the Tesseract—and Loki was denying he was in its possession.

The whole Avengers compound had become a bloody battlefield. There was debris, there were screams and the sounds of metal clashing. Clutching your dagger tighter, you watched how Thor was hurled through the air and landed on the hard ground.

“We don’t have the Tesseract! It was destroyed on Asgard!” He growled, spitting a mouthful of blood into the grass before two of Thanos’ lackeys managed to restrain him.

Loki briefly closed his eyes, guiltily. One single moment of negligence—and enough for Thanos to grab his head forcefully and throw him on the ground before Ebony Maw’s feet.

Loki gasped in pain but the ugly sorcerer did not hesitate. He raised his hands, fingers crooked… only to send shockwaves of agony through his blood. As a Frost Giant… the heat pumping through his veins was pure torture.

“The Tesseract…” Thanos remarked, seemingly unimpressed. Your eyes widened. Loki really had it. Of course he had it.

“Please, stop…” You heard yourself whisper, the pain he felt cursing through your own body. Only yours wasn’t physical. “Stop it! The Tesseract is not here. Let him live. Whatever he has done in the past, he did it to survive, wouldn’t you do the same?”

“He disappointed me,” the titan argued. “He failed.”

“We all do. It was not his fault. Look around you. Look at your forces fighting against a bunch of mortals. If they are having difficulties defeating them now, then how would you expect Loki to do it all on his own?”

Loki’s stunning blue eyes widened upon hearing your words. He kept grunting, growling and panting as Maw intensified the spell, making you panic slightly.

“I am not merciful, little one. If I were, I wouldn’t be where I am standing now.”

“You… don’t have to be.” You swallowed. “His life in exchange for mine. I shall serve you if you let him live.”

“Why would I want your allegiance?”

“I am an angel, too.”

Thanos raised his eyebrows.

“You would give your freedom to save him? Him?”

“Yes.” Blinking frantically to scare away the tears in your eyes, you watched the titan nod slowly. With a start, Ebony Maw stopped, earning him another pant from Loki. In his ugly hands… he held the Tesseract.

“You have a good heart, little one. Unfortunately… I don’t like being lied to.”

*It happened fast, almost too fast for you to comprehend. Thanos’ sword slashed through the cold air and Loki’s neck, blood spurting from the freshly cut wound and staining his skin and armour. His blue eyes closed, the downright repulsive sounds of him choking on his own blood filling your ears.

Then, he stopped moving, the red liquid still pouring from his neck.*

You screamed, both in pain and indescribable grief when Loki’s heart stopped beating. He had been right. You had been his very personal omen of death.

-

You didn’t sleep. You didn’t eat. You didn’t speak. Thanos was gone, two Infinity stones along with him. And while the Avengers were busy figuring out a plan to stop him once and for all, you spent your time sulking away in your room, your eyes red and swollen from the many tears you shed for the man you had never had a chance to love.

You had meant to save him. Loki had trusted you to seal his fate and when you had attempted to lay down your own life so he would survive, you had caused the exact opposite. It wasn’t your fault, not really and yet… it felt like it.

It felt like your heart had been ripped in pieces, like Thor had driven his beloved hammer into your chest repeatedly and shattered all of your ribs.

Dead. You had found the one man your poor existence as a god damn black angel had made sense for, the one man who could have made you happy. And now he was dead.

You were ready to do anything to get him back. And so you were plotting.

Whether Thor was grieving, you did not know. But you had heard of Ragnarok, the destruction of his home world, of Asgard, the realm of the gods. Hela had wreaked havoc and claimed the throne. Hela, the goddess of death… Hela, who could resurrect the dead and bring them back to life.

“Tony.” Your voice carried only feinted politeness. You simply did not care how worn out he was, noodling around in his lab. Neither did you care that Thor did not even look up when you entered.

“Can I speak to Thor, please? In private?”

He was his brother. If anyone was going to help you bring Loki back, it was him. Thor had complained about having lost Loki before. That he had thought him dead before. Whether he could not accept he was truly gone this time or had simply moved on, you could not tell. But you sincerely hoped Loki was important enough for him, worthy of saving.

The God of Thunder looked up, his brows raised in surprise. Nodding mutely, he stood and left the room, allowing you to close the door to Tony’s lab behind you.

“There is a way to bring Loki back alive.” You stated straight away, swallowing thickly. Thor crossed his arms before his chest, a defensive posture.

“What do you mean?”

“Loki is not in Valhalla, his soul did not… ascend. He should have been… he would not give Thanos the Tesseract to Thanos, he was enduring torture, he… wanted to save you. All of you, stop the titan himself. That… that means…” Again, you swallowed, forcing back the tears forming in your eyes. “It means he is in Hel. I’ve been there before, black angels… we are immune to… well, it doesn’t matter. But… the goddess of death. Hela, she could…”

“No.”

“What?”

“No.” Thor repeated sternly. “Hela is my sister. She caused the destruction of Asgard, she killed my friends and hundreds of innocent Asgardians.”

“I have heard the stories… but Thor, Loki is your brother.”

“Do you truly think she will resurrect him without asking for something in return? We barely managed to banish her again, I will not risk the subjugation of the nine… the eight realms.”

Angrily, you narrowed your eyes at him, your heart pounding in your chest.

“If Thanos gets a hold of the remaining Infinity Stones, say goodbye to the entire universe. He will be ten times worse than Hela. If anyone can help you defeat him, it’s your brother. Your brother, Thor.”

Why did he hesitate? As a black angel, you had never had brothers or sisters but if you did… if you did you would love and cherish them dearly. Did Thor not love Loki? Did he not love him as much as Loki loved Thor? You could see it in his eyes. Loki had a good heart, vulnerable and tainted but good.

“Why would you want to bring him back? You don’t know him. Loki’s been dead before, if it’s true this time… it is what it is.”  Thor mumbled. “Look, (Y/N)… Loki is dead because of you. Your appearance… it was the sign… there is no way around that.”

“That’s bullshit, Thor,” you snapped. All of a sudden, the truth spilled from your lips uncontrollably. “I’m not an omen of death, who came up with this? Loki was the only one who can see my wings because he was meant to be my soul mate. I… I fell in love with him the moment I first looked him in the eye. I was going to sacrifice my life to save him, those were not empty words, you heard them!”

Thor paused. “That’s… impossible. All my life… I grew up believing black angels were deadly.”

“We can be. My blades of my daggers are drowned in poison but we do not promise death to those we show our wings to. It wasn’t my decision, Thor. Please… help me bring your brother back.” This time, you were unable to hold back your tears. Sobbing quietly, they ran over your reddened cheeks.

The God of Thunder took a deep breath.

“I can take you to the portal. The rest is up to you. But if you endanger this realm by setting Hela free, you will live with the consequences because we will kill you. I have to protect these people, (Y/N).”

Determined, you nodded. “I will make this right, Thor. I promise.”

-

The portal was a church. At least, it looked like a church. Home of the angels… you snorted. If only you could live in a richly decorated church. The more you approached, the more of the dead energy did you feel. Helheim was near.

You had a plan, of course. It was risky and bold and perhaps a bit reckless… but at least, it was a plan. Thor had held his promise and he made sure to stay until you returned—with or without Loki.

Then, with one final deep breath—for there was no reason to breathe in Helheim—you stepped over the threshold of Durham Cathedral and disappeared into nowhere, an invisible force sucking you into another realm.

The stench of death filled your nose before you had even opened your eyes again, corpses, skeletons and bloody soil staining the dark landscape. Like you had expected, your presence in the realm of the dead as a living being did not go unnoticed.

“I’ve met black angels before. But they were dead.” Hela’s voice echoed through the minging air, her blue eyes, complimented by dark coal, boring into yours.

“I came to warn you.”

“Warn me? Child… Look around you… this place is dead. What do I have to fear?”

“Thanos. He means to wipe out half of the universe. Killing half of every single living being.”

Hela raised her eyebrows, seemingly unimpressed.

“Where do you think will most of these souls go? Half the universe… crammed in one realm. Your realm.”

“The Gauntlet. He has it then.”

“And he is collecting the stones. There is a force on Midgard… across the universe to stop him. They need all the help they can get.”

It was then the goddess of death began to smile cruelly. “Who is it you want me to resurrect?”

“How familiar are you with the powers of black angels?”

Hela shrugged. “They are meant to find their soul mates, the only beings they unwillingly reveal their true nature to.” As the goddess of death, she knew a lot more than the rest of the Asgardians then.

You nodded. “My powers were taken from me when I was cast out. They will return once I am reunited with mine.” That was a lie. But if Hela was Thor’s sister, you could imagine she did not exactly take a liking into Loki. “I need you to return Loki to the living. We stop Thanos, we stop this realm from destruction. And we both know that even Helheim could not take the masses of murderers and villains once the titan snaps his fingers.”

Snarling, she turned her scrutinising gaze away from you. “Loki?” She snorted. “You know what? Take him. Take that little cockroach and leave. Hel will be better off without his smug remarks.”

You were almost surprised by how calm you managed to speak with her. The prosperity of seeing Loki again filled your broken heart with joy and love, even if the God of Mischief himself, so you imagined, would hardly feel the same.

Hela narrowed her eyes. With but a flick of his wrist, she summoned Loki like a demon. Your heart skipped a beat when you spotted him. He did not look harmed, the atrocious wound on his neck luckily gone completely.

“I was trying to sleep. Forewarn me before you—“ Loki stopped his mocking complaint mid-sentence. His lips parted when he saw you—that’s when you had already thrown yourself into his arms and buried your face in his neck, inhaling his wonderful scent and enjoying the touch of his body, beginning to heal you instantly.

“Husband…” You murmured, knowing that Hela was still watching you intently.

Loki froze. “What?”

“Just play along. Please… I’m gonna get you out of here.” You whispered mutely. Then, you timidly pressed your lips against his, triggering an explosion of chemistry between you. You almost flinched… and apparently, Loki felt the same.

Hela rolled her eyes in a disgusted manner. Clearly, she was convinced. “Leave. Make sure not to return.” She flicked her wrists once more, almost as if taking a spell on Loki—whatever had been necessary to allow him to travel through the portal and back to the living.

Confidently, you reached for his hand, a touched smile spreading on your lips when he accepted it and followed you back to Midgard and into Durham Cathedral.

“Husband?” He repeated, ignoring Thor who received him with his mouth wide open.

“There is a lot of explaining I need to do, I’m afraid.” You began apologetically.

“Indeed.” He was still holding your hand, not pulling away. It filled your chest with a cosy warmth which you had never felt before.

“You… only you can see my wings.”

“I still do.”

“You… you can because… because I am your soul mate. I never was an omen of death, Loki. I.. love you.”

The God of Mischief’s face fell.

“What you said to Thanos… you did attempt to…” You nodded quickly.

“I… I had to try. Contacting Hela, convincing her to resurrect you…”

“Thank you.” He interrupted, looking you deep in the eye. It was surprise which you found sparkling in those blue irises. Surely… never had anyone done this for him. Surely, nobody else would have done this for him. Thor still went ignored.

“I… I can understand if you… if you don’t want me to stay. I can leave. Being my soul mate, it doesn’t… it doesn’t link you to me if you don’t want to.”

Your heart jumped when Loki began to smirk mischievously... but genuinely.

“Oh no, my dear. I think I am going to keep you.”

-

A/N: If you enjoyed this story, I would appreciate so much if you supported me on KoFi! kofi.com/sserpente

[notyetneedcoffee]

Soul Seer, Pt. 3

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Warnings: None this Chapter, but later

Author’s Note: Takes place right after Avengers 1, with time travel elements and hints of Infinity Wars. Does NOT follow cannon after Avengers.

* * *

Banner and Stark popped up from behind the server banks like a pair of meerkats when the door opened. Steve Rogers entered the room, a stern expression already locked on his face. Stark leaned casually on the wall, cleaning his immaculate nails with the screwdriver in his hand. “Hey Cap, you come to let us know that it’s dinner time, ‘cause you didn’t need to bother. My stomach is getting louder than when big green wants to redecorate.”

“No.” Steve fought to not roll his eyes. “Tell me you’re not doing what I’ve been told you’re doing.”

“Okay.” Tony shrugged. “We’re not.”

“Tony.”

“What?”

“Are you hijacking the SHIELD surveillance on Loki?” Steve frowned.

“Hacking.” Stark corrected. “It’s hacking. And it’s not about Loki, it’s about (Y/N). Having Reindeer Games rattling around in her head has got to be tough enough, I’m not going to hand her over to SHIELD on a silver platter, too.”

“What do you mean?” Steve took in the concerned look on both their faces.

“Now that they know she has this ability, and that she’s got all that knowledge from Loki in her mind,” Banner interjected. “You don’t think SHIELD would use any means necessary to assure her participation.”

“Like, say using footage of her crying and breaking down – a totally normal reaction when you’ve had a GOD shoved in your brain – to prove that you’re unstable and should be committed against your will.” Tony spat.

“You know it’s not beyond them.” Bruce sighed.

“So, you’re just going to turn the camera’s off?” Cap crossed his arms. Not liking the idea, but understanding the dilemma.  

“We’re going to fake it.” Stark shrugged. “Jarvis has been recording them for the last several hours. He’s created innocuous scenarios of them in discussions, reading, so on, to replace anything that needs to be replaced.”

“Currently, we have created a time delay of three minutes by stretching out the records by a few seconds at a time. That way we can still monitor what’s going on, but what goes on to the SHIELD monitors is controlled.” Bruce finished.

“And you’re confident this will work.” Steve asked, leaning against the desk. “They won’t be able to tell?”

“They’d have to beat Jarvis’ programming and they can’t.” Stark confirmed. “So, you going to rat on us, Cap?”

“No.” He sighed. “I’ll take a turn monitoring. This needs to stay as quite as possible. How are you going to let (Y/N) know?”

“That’s where Thor comes in.”

* * * * * 

Loki sat across the room, sipping on a cup of tea and holding yet another book. He spent more time watching your sleeping form out of the corner of his eye than reading, but those who watched would never know. Even though he placed you in the Dreamless Sleep, the urge to guard over you possessed him.

It took conscious effort to maintain the mask of passive indifference. How was he to mitigate the risk of someone, a mortal no less, knowing his inner most thoughts and memories? He looked at you, internally smirking at the irony that the very reason he felt the urge to protect you was the same reason he would normally kill you.  

A Midgardian mortal.  The Norns must be laughing their asses off.

Still, Loki admitted to himself, your ability to adapt impressed him. Your grasp of the situation, and the danger, impressed him as well. When you asked to be put back to sleep, he knew it was not physical fatigue you sought to remedy. Your walls were crumbling.  

The door opened. Loki did not hide the deep frown.

Thor’s bulk filled the doorway. He approached his brother cautiously, noting your sleeping figure on the bed, as he held out a book. “Brother. I’ve brought you something from home.”

“Your home, not mine.” Loki sneered, yet he snatched the book out of his hand.  

“I have spoken with Father about the information you shared here.” Thor sat across from Loki.  

“And?” Loki outwardly looked disinterested, but he knew the information would greatly impact his fate. Thor did not immediately answer. When Loki flipped open the book to avoid looking at his brother, he understood why. A new inscription had been written on the inside of his favorite tome.  

Written in Thor’s sloppy Vanir. “The iron one has diverted the eyes of the shield so the little one may cry without fear. Your secrets and hers will remain safe from now till two days hence.”

Loki looked up. “What does Odin say?”

“He was,” Thor sighed, “unmoved. However, Mother convinced him to reflect for a night before making any decision.”  

“She wishes to make her opinion known.”

“Mother is...” Thor shrugged.

“A force.” Loki grinned.  

Thor returned his grin, but it fell away quickly. “I will return as soon as I have news from Odin. We have convinced the powers here not to make a decision until we have a declaration from Asgard. It could be a few days. In the meantime, stay well, brother.”

Loki nodded. “Thank you for the book.”

As soon as the door closed he moved silently to it. Tracing the frame with a touch of his magic to seal the room from any sound escaping, he stood back and waited for someone to rush in. Nothing happened. Magically he rid himself of the clothes he wore, replacing them with soft silk pants and a tunic. Again, no one rushed in. He moved to you, waving a hand over your body clothing you in much the same way. He waited. No one intruded.  

Stark was true to his word.  

Loki sat beside you, smoothing back your hair and waking your from the Dreamless Sleep. Your eyes opened slowly. The feeling of rich silk on your skin made you smile. Then you realized it was not how you fell asleep.

“Did you change my clothes?” You asked quietly, a little shocked.

Loki smiled. “Yes, pet. With magic. I assure you, nothing inappropriate took place.”

“Magic?” You sat up. “And I missed it?”

“You will have plenty opportunity.” Loki’s long delicate fingers cupped your face. “Stark has managed to blind SHIELD from seeing us for a short time. Your words appeared to have an impact.”

“Oh.” You breathed, just staring at his strong angular features. The wick sharp eyes looked back, turning soft and sorrowful. “Oh. So we’re...” Your chest felt tight. The tension behind your eyes made them burn. “We’re actually alone.”

“I have cast a silence spell on the room.” Loki stroked your cheek. “Even the men posted outside would not hear the loudest scream.”

“What if I can’t stop?” You whispered, feeling as if a storm surge continued to grow over you like a tidal wave from a disaster movie.  

“I will be here.” Loki pressed his lips to the skin of your temple.  

It began with silent tears, a trickle of wetness trailing down your cheeks. Soon your lungs would not expand to allow you to breathe. Panic sunk its talons into your chest. Fire burned in your throat. Too many pains, too many aches, tried to claw from your heart at once.  

Loki held you to his chest, whispering quiet assurances to you. “Breathe, my pet. Let it come. You are strong. It will not break you.”

Pain, fear, anger, betrayal boiled up and ate at your throat like acid. Your fingers wound in Loki’s strong grip. “Fuck!”

A sad, rueful chuckle escaped his chest. “Most apt.”

“How? Fuck, Loki! How do you live with this?” You cried. It wouldn’t stop. Wave after wave crashed into you, stealing your breath and wracking your body. Time lost meaning.  

Somehow the room turned dark and you found yourself laying on the bed, curled against Loki’s chest. You held a damp linen handkerchief. The horrid, overwhelming emotions settled. It left you exhausted, raw. Tears still escaped from your tired eyes.  

You tipped your head up, seeing Loki’s face calm and passive. Except his eyes held the evidence his own tears. Dropping your head back to his chest, too tired to wonder how you ended up in the position or to question why it felt so comfortable, you buried your face against his chest.  He wrapped himself tighter around you.

“Why?” Your voice was hoarse. “Why do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Hold on to it all.” Taking a deep breath, it shuddered upon release. “For so long.”

Loki lay silently for a long time. You could imagine he was arguing with himself about whether or not you deserved an answer. So, you decided make the argument for him.

“Loki,” You began slowly. “I know you would never, ever, entertain the idea discussing such a thing with anyone, especially a mortal.” You felt him tense slightly. “But for whatever reason, I was able to help you. It came with a cost, though. I’ve been in your head, and survived. Now, knowing what I know of you, it puts us in a difficult situation.” You took a deep breath. “You can either trust me and have someone, for the first time ever, that really understands. Or you can doubt me and kill me for what I know.”

He lifted your face, to stare into your eyes. Something unidentifiable burned there. The feelings radiating off him were deep and too complex to pin down. Finally, Loki pressed his lips to your forehead and spoke, his voice thick and deep. “I vow that you shall not die by my hand, though what you ask is not something I can answer yet.”

“Fair enough.” You sighed, relaxing back against him. “What time is it?”

“Your breakdown lasted approximately four hours.”  

The absurdity of the way he answered made you giggle.  

“Are you alright?”  

“Yes.” You wiped the last of your tears away. The giggle felt good. “I need to laugh.”

“You need to sleep.” Loki tried to hold you against him.

“No. Tell me a story, something funny, something embarrassing about Thor.”

He sighed, but you could hear the smile in his voice. “Very well. When we were young, Thor took a liking to this particular daughter of one of our father’s generals...”

You weren’t sure when you fell asleep, but Loki brought tears of laughter to your eyes and recited tales told to him by Frigga until you drifted to sleep.  

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[thorne93]

Unforeseen Chasm (Part 13)

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together.

Word Count:2436

Warnings: Language

Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my novels). It’s a collaboration with the amazing @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​. It started as a funny “What if…?” and it evolved and got huge. This took two years to write. We are both proud and happy and we hope you enjoy it. It follows from Thor 1 to Endgame in the MCU. Some of the timelines may be off in order to fit certain people, and some characters may show up earlier or in different ways than they have in the movie. But for the most part, it follows the MCU. It also has a bit of crossover with some other Marvel characters throughout the story.

Masterlist for Unforeseen Chasm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A piercing scream echoed in the bedroom, making Tony jolt awake. He saw Shannon, in tears, writhing next to him. 

“Shan? Shannon? Baby,” he coaxed, shaking her, trying to get her to wake. Finally, she stirred, slapping Tony’s hands away before she was fully conscious. 

Her eyes were wild, her breathing frantic. She finally realized where she was as Tony continued to try and hold her. 

“Tony?” she said, almost as if she were confused.

“I’m here, I’m here. It’s alright… Another nightmare?” he asked as he pulled her close to him, soothing her.

She nodded. “Mhm. I saw her die, Tony…”

“We don’t know she’s dead,” he retorted. 

“It’s been six months, Tony. She hasn’t written back since my last letter. What else could it be?” she argued through the tears.

“I don’t know,” he honestly said, still consoling her. 

Only a few hours later, she and Tony started their day. Shannon worked in the lab, as she always did, but the dark circles under her eyes were becoming a permanent fixture on her face. She tried to concentrate but how could she do that when you were out there somewhere? Had you died? If so, why didn’t Thor send word? If you were alive, why were you ignoring her? 

Perhaps you really had chosen Asgard over her and Earth. In your last letter to her, you said you would have to make a decision. Perhaps you did and decided to cut all ties with your past. 

But she couldn’t bring herself to believe that or accept it. You wouldn’t just abandon her. Even if you decide to make Asgard your home, you would tell her.  

She needed to find out what happened to you, but she had no idea where to begin and it was killing her. Tony could see the weight it put on her, Bruce could see it. Even JARVIS noticed it, as he tried to play upbeat songs or help her with her work. She waited and waited on a letter that would never come. She watched every day for a black raven. Every bird that flew by the tower made her head snap up in attention, only for her heart to fall in disappointment as it soared by.

“Is there anything I can do?” Tony asked point blank that night over dinner.

“Got any way to reach an Asgardian god?” she mused, playing with her food, but not eating. 

Tony sighed slightly. “No, babe, I don’t… I’m so sorry. I’m sure we’ll hear something from her.”

“Yeah… maybe,” she said, but she was rapidly giving up hope. She cleared her plate and trudged to bed, praying no more nightmares came from you, and that in the morning, there would be some news of you.

-------------

Gasping, you woke up in the dark, dismal room that was your hut on this shit planet. It was dark inside, but the doorway was entirely open, no door, and the outside was dim. Your breath became ragged as you hugged yourself. The reality of where you were hit you like a ton of bricks and you began sobbing. 

Another day of torture awaited Loki, just as it had yesterday. Thanos made you listen to his screams, watch his anguish, a reminder that if you defied them or failed them this would be the price you would pay. Loki tried to be strong, he tried to be quiet in his pain, but they were too extreme. They used some sort of stone to twist his mind, to inflict pain. They beat him daily with their weapons, all while you sat by and watched. 

You were a prisoner in a foreign land, doomed to watch the love of your life suffer, while you were fed lies at the hand of man you could not fight.

“My love?” Loki asked, sitting up with a sleepy voice. Sleep was the only thing that kept him sane... well, other than you, vowing your love to him every night. You swore you would make them pay for what they had done to him, to both of you. Each night you caressed him, held him close, and pledged your undying love to him. Mainly so he wouldn’t think you were trying to betray him, because thanks to Thanos, everyone looked like an enemy to Loki. 

He heard your sobs and instantly sat up to pull you close to him.

“I want to go home,” you said in the most desperate tone you’d ever used, sobbing strangling your voice. “I miss my family. I miss Shannon. I miss Lucky.” 

“I know, darling,” he said quietly before kissing your hair. “I know…” It killed Loki to see you in this much torment, because if it weren’t for him, you wouldn’t be here. If he’d just stayed on Asgard he wouldn’t watch you suffer, and he wouldn’t be in tremendous pain every day. 

But he couldn’t change the past. 

You clutched him as if your life depended it on it. If it weren’t for Loki, you would’ve just killed yourself a long time ago. It would be better than living in this Hell. He held you back, equally as tight, hoping that he could make this better some way. Nothing came to mind. He had no way to get you to Earth. He did not know this realm well at all and was not allowed to wander. 

You cried the rest of the night until the Chitauri guards literally ripped you from your bed and threw you at Thanos feet. He would use the magic stone to pull your insecurities out, twist them, bloat them, then put them back in your head. Meanwhile, Loki was brainwashed only ten feet from you, and brutally beaten down, so that he would not have the strength to fight them off.

This... 

This was your life for the last six months, and it would be still for the foreseeable future, and you weren’t sure how much more you could take. 

------------------------------------

A knock came at Shannon’s apartment. Well, technically your apartment. But you hadn’t seen this place in over a year. Somewhere, deep within you, you knew you should be nervous about this encounter, but you couldn’t find it in you. Hopefully she opened up soon, though, because right now in your all black ensemble (including combat boots, leather pants, a hooded robe, and black corset), you stuck out like a sore thumb.

Finally, she opened the door, taking you in. 

“Y/N?” Shannon breathed, her eyes raking over you. 

“It’s me,” you said, grinning softly. 

In an instant, she wrapped you in a tight embrace. So tight, you thought maybe she would cut off your oxygen, but as a goddess that was impossible for her. At least using her physical strength.

“Y/N, where the hell have you been? Did you get my letter asking you to come back? Why haven’t you written back to me?” She railed you with questions. 

You laughed and said, “If you let me inside, I’ll explain everything.”

“Right, yeah of course this is your home too.” She moved to the side to let you in. 

You gave an awkward laugh, not sure how to respond to that. She was right but this didn’t feel like a home. 

“Is Tony here?” you asked, peering around. 

“No he’s back at the tower, he’s been working on some updates for one of his suits,” she said as she walked to the living room. “To be honest I haven't seen him in a few days. I get updates from JARVIS if he’s slept.”

You nodded slightly. “Oh that’s good.” You stopped for a second and corrected yourself. “I mean, it’s good that he’s working. He’s always inventing something, working, that’s good. Not so much about the fucked up sleep. How are you two doing, anyway? Still… dating?”

“Well we haven’t really gone out too much since the last time. We’ve both been busy on our ends. I’m working with Jane recently on creating some new tech for her research.” She played with her fingers. “We eat dinner together when we can,” she sighed like it was a weight on her. 

You frowned sorrowfully. “I’m… sorry to hear that. And I’m sorry I haven’t gotten back to you. I never got another letter. I told you about my parents and...Well... I got busy.”

“Forget about me, tell me all about Asgard! All the picture you sent were stunning! Do you plan on publishing any of your notes of your studies there?” she asked eagerly wanting to catch up on lost time. “I mean it's been a whole year you must have tons of new discoveries made.”

“Oh, yeah, I discovered all kinds of things while I was away. Things you wouldn’t believe. Asgard truly is stunning. It has a lot of...shocking details about it. I will make sure the world knows all about Asgard,” you promised with a double-edged grin. 

“Tell me more, Y/N. There’s got to be so many things you wanna tell me! I mean, that’s if you wanna tell me,” she said, feeling like she was being to pushy. “Maybe later we can go to the tower and see what tricks Queen Frigga and Loki taught you?”

“Absolutely! Could you make some tea first though? I’m a little parched,” you requested. “I would love to go to the tower. I can’t wait to see Tony. I’m sure he’ll be surprised to see me. Has he asked about me?”

“Anything for you, Y/N! Yeah he was missing being able to bother you sometimes. He would ask if I’d heard from you,” she said while going to start the water for the tea. “I bet it will be a surprise for him but it’ll be a good way to get him out of the lab. It might even make Lucky happy. He’s been pretty sad lately with your absence. It’s like he remembers you sometimes and gets sad,” she said looking over at the picture of the three of you at the park. 

A twinge of pain twisted inside your heart at her words. You never intended to hurt Lucky. Your eyes followed her gaze to a photo on the wall. You remembered that day, barely. You were a different person then -- human, physicist, powerless…. 

“That’s sad to hear. I hope to see him when we see Tony. And Bruce? How is Dr. Banner doing? Still getting angry and turning into the Pissed off Green Giant?” you asked with a perch of your eyebrow. 

“He hasn’t hulked out as much as he used to. I’ve been helping him find ways to keep the big guy calm.” She looked over to you to see a change in your mood you seemed a bit down. “But I have heard him argue with the big guy a few times”

Your eyes lit up. “So, he still struggles with the Hulk, hmm? Hasn’t quite caged the beast?” you asked, a sparkle in your eyes. 

She didn’t notice the change in your voice. “It's a bit hard for him with how Shield has been keeping him in their radar lately. Hulk wants to go somewhere away from them and Bruce won’t allow it with the new advancements he’s made with reversing his mutation.” She walked back to the couch with some tea on the tray with some goodies. 

“Oh, so you know where he is?” you asked while taking a cup of tea. “Would you be able to get him to the Tower? I’d love to see him.”

“Last I heard from him was a few weeks ago. Something about flying somewhere to find some sort of botanical garden that could help him.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I could always ask  JARVIS to locate him. That is assuming he still has the tracker on him.”

“A tracker? How… handy,” you mused. “Yes, I would very much like to know where Banner is at.”

“We can do that when we head to the tower. I haven’t had a chance to install the Al system into the apartment so I can get my documents sent from the lab here.” She pointed to the direction of the tower. “Did you ever get to defeat Sif or Thor from your training?”

A fond smile fell on your face for a moment. “As a matter of fact, I did. I beat every opponent I came against. I was able to trick Thor, mainly. The rest are just reliant on strength and speed.” You scoffed. “It takes so much more than that to win a war…”

She looked over and was unable to read your emotions. “What...what do you mean, Y/N? You didn’t go off to fight a war, did you?!” She became worried instantly. 

You shook your head slightly at first. “No, well… not at first. No. Not intentionally. Don’t worry. I’m fine.” You flashed a smile at her but she wasn’t sold. Of course she wasn’t. She knew you too well and you hadn’t mastered the art of trickery -- no, that was Loki’s forte. 

“Is everything alright, Y/N/N? You seem a bit off, is there anything I could do? If you need to rest let me know. I’ll see if I can get the training room set for just us two and hopefully Stevie isn’t training in there.” She put her hand on your knee to comfort you.  

Her touch made you recoil violently. You couldn’t help it. The only person who could touch you without harming you was Loki. 

“I’m sorry about that,” you said, trying to smooth your outfit and hair out. “What were you saying? Ah, yes. Rest. Shannon, I don’t think it’s me who needs the rest. Aren’t you a little tired?” You snapped your fingers once in front of her, hoping that would do the trick you needed. 

Shannon saw the way you moved away from her touch and wanted to address it, but she yawned in an instant. 

“Now that you say it, I am a bit tired, I haven't slept well since you’ve been gone. I missed us having those late night chats.” She stretched. “I might go take a small nap before we leave, just a short nap I promise.” She smiled sweetly at you. 

You nodded at her. “You do that, darling. I’ll be right here when you wake up,” you promised. 

With that, Shannon stood up and walked back to her bedroom. When her door closed, you pulled out your phone and made a quick phone call, staring down the hall. “Yeah, I’ve got her. We’re halfway there.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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UC:

@lokis-high-priestess​

[nygmobblepot-trash]

Untitled Story (part 2 out of ???)

Buckle up for this boys and girls. Apparently I had a lot of pent up anger that I just let out in this chapter. By the time I got to end I was tearing up for some reason. :)

*******************************************************************************************

Strange watched tiredly as his monitors awoke from being asleep for weeks. He was constantly collecting data, reading and interpreting it was another story.

“You’re tracking the Tesseract’s energy?! That’s so smart, you can see every place he goes and for how long. You could make a map and try to figure out if there is a pattern.” Strange watched as Peter’s eyes lit up with an excitement he hadn’t seen or even felt for years. Without looking at the screen or keyboard Strange brought up the map Peter was talking about.

“Oh. Of course you already thought about doing that... sorry.” Peter then became visibly confused. “I-I don’t understand. Why would he still be in the same place? It’s been more than a week. According to your graphs he hasn’t been in more than one place longer than 3 days.”

“You’re must be reading it wrong or the machine is busted.” Strange turned back to the screen to make his own observations.

“No the boy is right. You would have missed your chance if we had not come here and dragged your sorry ass off that ugly floor. Where is the Ant Man? You said we would need him to get to Loki. We should not waste anymore time.” Now it was Thor’s turn to be excited. 

Strange spun his chair around to face Thor. “Don’t be stupid. This is obviously a trap. I know you are used to doing whatever the hell you want, but that is not going to happen while you are with me. I make the decisions here, not you. I will not allow you to make things worse, because you think you need to save that person. He’s not even your brother. He’s just an asshole from a different universe. Your Loki is dead. He is dead and he is never coming back. You cannot and will not use this one to replace what you have lost.” Stephen was not conscious of the words coming out of his mouth if he had been he would have stopped way sooner. When he finally realized what he had done he was standing face to face with the God with his finger placed on his chest.

‘Shit.’ He thought.

Peter stood up and started talking... too fast for Strange to even begin to understand. He was probably trying to talk Thor out of killing him.

Thor just stood there not saying a word. He only smiled. Stephen couldn’t see his eyes behind those stupid black sunglasses Thor wore to hide any emotion. When did he even put those on?

Suddenly Thor came to life and twisted Stephen’s shaking hand. He spoke still with a cruel smile,”Listen here, Wizard. I am not listening to person responsible for everyone who died during that purple bastards war path. You told me you keep a watch list of beings from other realms that might be a threat to this one. You said Loki was on that list and you knew the second he was on Earth. Do you honestly expect me to believe that Thanos was not on that list. You know the guy who made it know that he wanted to collect the infinity stones to kill half the universe. Loki told me there was a bigger threat. I did not listen, but Tony did and he constantly worried about it. Tony worked to fight him. What did you do? Huh!? Tell me Wizard!” With every word Thor and gripped Strange’s hand tighter and tighter then he began twisting it.

“Thor stop, you’re going to break his hand!” Peter desperately pleaded with the God. Strange didn’t think Thor could even hear the boy anymore or even feel him as Peter tried his best to pry Thor away. 

Stephen tried to answer, but the pain was too great. “...I-I.”

It became obvious Thor was not going to release his hand until he received an answer so Stephen tried again with a sharp inhale. “I didn’t think... h-he’d come... so... soon. I-I thought, I thought I had more time!” Strange yelled as the pain became too great.

“You didn’t see him coming?” Thor asked with a laugh. He let go of Stephen’s hand in favor of grabbing him by his outfit and slamming him into the wall. “You had the time stone. What do you mean that you couldn’t see him coming? So either you did not use the time stone to see future threats or you watched him kill those innocent Asgardians, my best friend, and Loki and thought that was perfectly alright because he hadn’t interfered with your precious Earth yet. Or even better you had watched the entire thing play out and only pretended to look at the possible futures for the first time with Peter and Tony.”

“...Yeah why did you wait so long to use the time stone?” Peter had stopped trying to help Strange. 

‘You’re fucked now. Why does he feel so strongly about Loki? If it had been him who died, I doubt Loki would even blink an eye let alone get revenge. He would hide and wait for someone else to take care of the issue. But that is besides the point. Why did you wait?’

‘Why?’

‘Why?’

‘Why?’

“If you could see every terrible thing out there in the world and all the horrible things they could do, knowing that you had no chance in beating them, you would lock the damn thing away, and try to forget the nightmares that would soon become reality. I knew of Thanos. I knew of the Hell he would bring. I also knew we stood no chance. I decided to deal with the more beatable ones until I could figure out what to do. I didn’t tell Stark, because I knew what he would drive himself mad trying to create an armor to save himself. There was no point. Speaking of people who knew. What about Odin? I’m sure the God of Gods knew of Thanos. Why didn’t he try to stop him?” Stephen added the final blow with a smile.

‘Stop digging this hole.’

Thor spoke softer than he had all day. “My father kept a lot of secrets. It seems like everything was a lie or a secret. I thought I knew him, but now I understand I know nothing. Hel Loki knew more than I do. As much as I want to throw you through this wall for insulting him, I cannot defend him. I’m sure he had his reasons, but I do not know what they were. Maybe he was a coward like you or wanted to avoid the conflict for as long as possible. Odin is dead, but you and I are not. We must atone for our mistakes. I regret most of my past and I will do my best so that my future will not have the same fate. You on the other hand want someone to tell you that you did a wonderful job and that you made the right choices. You want someone to take those deaths off your conscience. I will not be that person, Strange. You have to live with your mistakes like everyone else. I hope eventually you will be able to live with yourself again. All the other Avengers are doing that. Quill and the Guardians were able to being Gamora back into their family. Steve lived the life he should have had in the first place. Clint has his family back. Bruce has made peace with the Hulk. Natasha, Tony, and I have not got our happy endings. You took that away. I’m going to make sure it happens and it is not selfish to do so. I do not need you, so if you are going to continue to stand in my way we can settle this here and now.” 

“I’m trying to fix my mistakes Thor. I am afraid to make more. I do not want you to make anymore either. As much as I want everyone to have a good ending, life is never so kind to allow it. There are consequences for everything we do. I do not see how you will be able to achieve all of this without making the universe suffer. I do not want to be the bad guy, but if I have to fight you to make sure the universe does not suffer I will. In one of the futures I saw you bear the gauntlet. What you wanted collapsed the universe. Please listen to reason Thor.”

“Alright then, you made your choice.” Thor said devoid of any emotion.

As Thor released one of his hands to summon Stormbreaker, Peter grabbed Thor’s arm and yelled, “H-Hey! Calm down both of you, please! Killing each other will only make things worse. You both have good points so can’t we compromise?”

“No.” Both men answered in unison not breaking eye contact.

“No shut up! You’re both Avengers why are you fighting each other?”

“As I recall the first time you met the Avengers they were fighting each other.” Stephen was quick to add.

“That’s not fair first of all. Second of all... Thor do you think Natasha or Tony would want you to do this?” Peter’s muffled voice came out from under Thor’s arm as he was still holding on for what seemed like dear life.

“Tony started that fight because Steve wanted to protect the man who killed his parents. I think Tony would be happy if I killed the man responsible for taking him away from his family.” Thor’s voice started to break. “Loki would be angry that it was me who bested the Wizard instead of him.” A sad smile came to Thor’s lips. Strange swear he could see tears start to build up behind the sunglasses. “Heimdall would tell me that I am acting like a spoiled child rather than a wise king.”

“Wait whose Heimdall?” Peter asked lifting his face above Thor’s arm.

“Natasha...” Thor now struggled to get his words out. “Natasha would tell me it is okay and to not worry about her. She would not approve of this either. Strange I will figure out a way to bring them back without damning this universe to Hel. They did not give up on us so we cannot give up on them. I will help you fix what Loki has done, but I ask you to allow me to do something good. You do not have to help me, but please do not stand in my way.”

“I suppose we can work together until what Loki has caused is fixed. After that we’ll see if we can agree on what to do next.” Strange slowly raised his unbroken hand. “Deal?”

Instead of shaking his hand, Thor dropped Strange without another word and slowly lowered the arm that Peter clung to. 

“I guess I’ll take that as a yes.” Strange sighed.

“Thank God.” Peter released the breath and stressed he didn’t know he had been holding and collapsed on the floor next to Stephen. 

“Why do you guys only call me when you’re trying to kill each other?” A familiar voice whined on the other side of the room.

Scott and Peter looked up to see Scott looking annoyed. Thor still hadn’t moved since he set Peter down. 

Scott waved his coffee around as he talked. “How come no one says, ‘Hi Scott we are going out for Tacos and we want you to come because you’re apart of the time and we like you. It’s kind of our fault that your under house arrest and all so we’d like to make it up to you.’ Don’t get me wrong I would do anything for Ste- I mean Cap. He said I could call him that. Because we are good friends and- hey is he okay?” Scott finally noticed Thor and how he still hadn’t moved. “How you doing Buddy?” Scott asked Thor like he was talking to a 3 year old and started to reach his hand out to pat Thor on the back to Peter’s horror. 

“Scott, you’re here to set up the universe travel thing for Strange... remember? Can you show me how it works?” Peter jumped up and pulled Scott away before he could make contact with the unpredictable mess Thor currently was. He didn’t want to leave Thor and Strange alone together, but leaving Scott in the room would only guarantee a fight. 

“...I guess I could.” Scott slowly made his way past Thor and to the other room where his equipment was. Before he was completely out of the room he glanced back at Thor. “I definitely need to know what is going on with that though. He’s freaking me out.”

“Yeah he’s scaring everyone today, it’s okay.” Peter shoved Scott forward out of the room. “Please behave you guys.” Peter added as he left.

Stephen directed his attention to Thor. “Are you broken or what?” When he didn’t get a response he decided it would be a good idea to throw a loose screw at Thor’s head. 

Throw grabbed his glasses and broke them. He then threw them at Stephen. “I was trying to calm myself. Bruce taught me some breathing techniques to use when I get angry. I told him of course that it was stupid and I would never use it. But now I see the point. He must use it to stop ripping people like you to shreds.” He stretched his hand out to Strange.

“You’d lose.” Strange said standing without Thor’s help.

“I’d never lose to a coward.” Thor smiled and without another word left to join Scott and Peter, leaving Strange and his broken hand alone.

*******************************************************************************************

“-need to test it. I tested it last time, so I’m not doing it this time.” Scott stopped when he realized Thor had joined them. “Hey Thor you look like you’re not scared of death why don’t you test this.”

“Scott-” Peter was in the process of telling Scott of how much of a bad idea that was when Thor interrupted.

“Alright.”

“Awesome, go get your suit on and we’ll see if I hooked this thing up correctly, sound good, big buy?” Scott ran over and grabbed Thor’s suit.

As Peter heard Thor pass Strange on his way to change he heard them say some incredibly not so nice things to each other. “This is a bad idea and we should stop now.” Peter whined as he brought his hands to his face.

“It’s too late for that.” Strange yelled from the other room.

Eventually Thor came back into the room. “Alright just stand on that pad and give me a second. I need to figure out where to send you where you won’t cause damage.

Strange laughed from somewhere else in the Sanctum.

“How about...” Thor proceeded to give a very specific time.

“Why that one?” Scott asked.

“Why not?” Thor shrugged.

“Okay obviously we shouldn’t do that one.” Peter told Scott.

“What’s the worse he could do in a few seconds? It may not even work.” 

“Scott no.” Peter pleaded.

Thor smiled sweetly.

“Aw look it that face. I trust him. You got it Buddy!” Scott quickly typed in the coordinates and time and pushed the go button before Peter could stop him.

“Scott!” Peter yelled.

“Dude i’m going to listen to a God over you. Strange may have a death wish, but I do not.”

*******************************************************************************************

Thor once again felt the familiar pull of being ripped from his current point in time to one that had already unfolded. 10 seconds ago Thor was sure he wanted to do this. Now he wasn’t so sure as he felt his feet hit solid ground again. He didn’t dare open his eyes. He knew the irony of his actions. He had been yelling at Strange all day for being a coward and now he couldn’t open his eyes and witness his nightmare yet again. He couldn’t change anything in the nightmare, but now he could. He just needed to open his eyes and rip off the return switch off his suit.

“Dread it. Run from it. Destiny arrives all the same.” A voice pierced through Thor’s thoughts. Normally those words would be the last thing he would before he woke drenched in sweat and tears. These words would wake him up again, but instead of seeing his tv displaying a game he fell asleep during he saw a ship on fire and some rubble. 

Thor slowly stood until he could see over the rubble. He had to know. Loki threw his life away to save his. Something had to have happened that Thor missed. It happened when Thanos was giving his speech. 

Once over the rubble Thor could see that he was behind Thanos. Thanos did stand where Thor was moments ago before he dragged past Thor closer to his captive brother.

He looked past Thanos to his goons who were entranced by what their dipshit ruler was saying.

Thor remembered he didn’t have much time left and as searched for Loki he grabbed his return switch. He stopped when he realized Loki was staring right back him. Tears quickly fell from Thor’s tear ducts and made their way down his face.

He wanted to tell Loki not to worry because his big brother would protect him like he promised all those years ago. That everything would turn out okay this time. It was and still is a good idea for Loki to go to Earth.

He watched Loki’s expression change like he had a million times in his dreams. Loki then turned his head to Thanos.

Thor’s finger’s brushed up against his return switch as he felt himself be pulled away.

When he saw Strange, Peter, and Scott all arguing he screamed. “NO, I COULD HAVE SAVED HIM!”

“Thor what did you do?” Peter asked calmly as he could.

“Nothing. I could have if you just let me-” Thor dropped to the floor in defeat.

“No you could have screwed us all. We made a deal. You can’t pull crap like this anymore. I wondered what that time could be. Your lucky I figured it out and pulled you out when I did.” Strange scolded. He then turned to Scott.

“Hey sometimes the button sticks! I tried to pull him out sooner.” Scott threw his hands in the air.

“We know it works now. I would like to get this mission over as soon as possible, so everyone get ready.” Strange said as he walked out.

“Shouldn’t we get more people?” Peter asked when he realized Strange and Thor would kill each other if they went alone.

“You’re not going, kid?” Scott asked surprised.

Peter felt his stomach drop. “I-I...” The fights with Thanos and Beck popped into his head.

Scott quickly put his hand on Peter’s shoulder bring him back to reality. “Hey don’t worry about it. I need help watching and controlling everything anyways. I’m sure those two will be fine.” Scott smiled reassuringly.

Peter looked back at Thor who was still having a break down on the floor.

“I’ll go in there if things get ugly, okay?” Scott pat Peter on the head and walked over to Thor. “We’ll find a way Buddy. Just hold on a little longer.”

Thor cleared the tears from his face and nodded. “Thank you not currently tiny man.”

*******************************************************************************************

[mrs-dragneel-stark-solo]

Unforseen Chasm (part 13)

Part 13 of Unforseen Chasm

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together. Word Count: 2436 Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my other fic series). first major Collab with my best friend @thorne93​​ what was first a simple “what if” moment turned into a two year writing session and I’ve never been more prouder of myself than when i started my first series. goes through most of the MCU plots there are some changes to accommodate for what we wanted and there is a bit of a crossover between the MCU and other characters. I hope you guys enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it.

A piercing scream echoed in the bedroom, making Tony jolt awake. He saw Shannon, in tears, writhing next to him.

“Shan? Shannon? Baby,” he coaxed, shaking her, trying to get her to wake. Finally, she stirred, slapping Tony’s hands away before she was fully conscious.

Her eyes were wild, her breathing frantic. She finally realized where she was as Tony continued to try and hold her.

“Tony?” she said, almost as if she were confused.

“I’m here, I’m here. It’s alright… Another nightmare?” he asked as he pulled her close to him, soothing her.

She nodded. “Mhm. I saw her die, Tony…”

“We don’t know she’s dead,” he retorted. 

“It’s been six months, Tony. She hasn’t written back since my last letter. What else could it be?” she argued through the tears.

“I don’t know,” he honestly said, still consoling her.

Only a few hours later, she and Tony started their day. Shannon worked in the lab, as she always did, but the dark circles under her eyes were becoming a permanent fixture on her face. She tried to concentrate but how could she do that when you were out there somewhere? Had you died? If so, why didn’t Thor send word? If you were alive, why were you ignoring her?

Perhaps you really had chosen Asgard over her and Earth. In your last letter to her, you said you would have to make a decision. Perhaps you did and decided to cut all ties with your past.

But she couldn’t bring herself to believe that or accept it. You wouldn’t just abandon her. Even if you decide to make Asgard your home, you would tell her.  

She needed to find out what happened to you, but she had no idea where to begin and it was killing her. Tony could see the weight it put on her, Bruce could see it. Even JARVIS noticed it, as he tried to play upbeat songs or help her with her work. She waited and waited on a letter that would never come. She watched every day for a black raven. Every bird that flew by the tower made her head snap up in attention, only for her heart to fall in disappointment as it soared by.

“Is there anything I can do?” Tony asked point blank that night over dinner.

“Got any way to reach an Asgardian god?” she mused, playing with her food, but not eating.

Tony sighed slightly. “No, babe, I don’t… I’m so sorry. I’m sure we’ll hear something from her.”

“Yeah… maybe,” she said, but she was rapidly giving up hope. She cleared her plate and trudged to bed, praying no more nightmares came from you, and that in the morning, there would be some news of you.

Gasping, you woke up in the dark, dismal room that was your hut on this shit planet. It was dark inside, but the doorway was entirely open, no door, and the outside was dim. Your breath became ragged as you hugged yourself. The reality of where you were hit you like a ton of bricks and you began sobbing.

Another day of torture awaited Loki, just as it had yesterday. Thanos made you listen to his screams, watch his anguish, a reminder that if you defied them or failed them this would be the price you would pay. Loki tried to be strong, he tried to be quiet in his pain, but they were too extreme. They used some sort of stone to twist his mind, to inflict pain. They beat him daily with their weapons, all while you sat by and watched.

You were a prisoner in a foreign land, doomed to watch the love of your life suffer, while you were fed lies at the hand of man you could not fight.

“My love?” Loki asked, sitting up with a sleepy voice. Sleep was the only thing that kept him sane… well, other than you, vowing your love to him every night. You swore you would make them pay for what they had done to him, to both of you. Each night you caressed him, held him close, and pledged your undying love to him. Mainly so he wouldn’t think you were trying to betray him, because thanks to Thanos, everyone looked like an enemy to Loki.

He heard your sobs and instantly sat up to pull you close to him.

“I want to go home,” you said in the most desperate tone you’d ever used, sobbing strangling your voice. “I miss my family. I miss Shannon. I miss Lucky.”

“I know, darling,” he said quietly before kissing your hair. “I know…” It killed Loki to see you in this much torment, because if it weren’t for him, you wouldn’t be here. If he’d just stayed on Asgard he wouldn’t watch you suffer, and he wouldn’t be in tremendous pain every day.

But he couldn’t change the past.

You clutched him as if your life depended it on it. If it weren’t for Loki, you would’ve just killed yourself a long time ago. It would be better than living in this Hell. He held you back, equally as tight, hoping that he could make this better some way. Nothing came to mind. He had no way to get you to Earth. He did not know this realm well at all and was not allowed to wander.

You cried the rest of the night until the Chitauri guards literally ripped you from your bed and threw you at Thanos feet. He would use the magic stone to pull your insecurities out, twist them, bloat them, then put them back in your head. Meanwhile, Loki was brainwashed only ten feet from you, and brutally beaten down, so that he would not have the strength to fight them off.

This…

This was your life for the last six months, and it would be still for the foreseeable future, and you weren’t sure how much more you could take.

A knock came at Shannon’s apartment. Well, technically your apartment. But you hadn’t seen this place in over a year. Somewhere, deep within you, you knew you should be nervous about this encounter, but you couldn’t find it in you. Hopefully she opened up soon, though, because right now in your all black ensemble (including combat boots, leather pants, a hooded robe, and black corset), you stuck out like a sore thumb.

Finally, she opened the door, taking you in.

“Y/N?” Shannon breathed, her eyes raking over you.

“It’s me,” you said, grinning softly.

In an instant, she wrapped you in a tight embrace. So tight, you thought maybe she would cut off your oxygen, but as a goddess that was impossible for her. At least using her physical strength.

“Y/N, where the hell have you been? Did you get my letter asking you to come back? Why haven’t you written back to me?” She railed you with questions.

You laughed and said, “If you let me inside, I’ll explain everything.”

“Right, yeah of course this is your home too.” She moved to the side to let you in.

You gave an awkward laugh, not sure how to respond to that. She was right but this didn’t feel like a home.

“Is Tony here?” you asked, peering around.

“No he’s back at the tower, he’s been working on some updates for one of his suits,” she said as she walked to the living room. “To be honest I haven’t seen him in a few days. I get updates from JARVIS if he’s slept.”

You nodded slightly. “Oh that’s good.” You stopped for a second and corrected yourself. “I mean, it’s good that he’s working. He’s always inventing something, working, that’s good. Not so much about the fucked up sleep. How are you two doing, anyway? Still… dating?”

“Well we haven’t really gone out too much since the last time. We’ve both been busy on our ends. I’m working with Jane recently on creating some new tech for her research.” She played with her fingers. “We eat dinner together when we can,” she sighed like it was a weight on her.

You frowned sorrowfully. “I’m… sorry to hear that. And I’m sorry I haven’t gotten back to you. I never got another letter. I told you about my parents and…Well… I got busy.”

“Forget about me, tell me all about Asgard! All the picture you sent were stunning! Do you plan on publishing any of your notes of your studies there?” she asked eagerly wanting to catch up on lost time. “I mean it’s been a whole year you must have tons of new discoveries made.”

“Oh, yeah, I discovered all kinds of things while I was away. Things you wouldn’t believe. Asgard truly is stunning. It has a lot of…shocking details about it. I will make sure the world knows all about Asgard,” you promised with a double-edged grin.

“Tell me more, Y/N. There’s got to be so many things you wanna tell me! I mean, that’s if you wanna tell me,” she said, feeling like she was being to pushy. “Maybe later we can go to the tower and see what tricks Queen Frigga and Loki taught you?”

“Absolutely! Could you make some tea first though? I’m a little parched,” you requested. “I would love to go to the tower. I can’t wait to see Tony. I’m sure he’ll be surprised to see me. Has he asked about me?”

“Anything for you, Y/N! Yeah he was missing being able to bother you sometimes. He would ask if I’d heard from you,” she said while going to start the water for the tea. “I bet it will be a surprise for him but it’ll be a good way to get him out of the lab. It might even make Lucky happy. He’s been pretty sad lately with your absence. It’s like he remembers you sometimes and gets sad,” she said looking over at the picture of the three of you at the park.

A twinge of pain twisted inside your heart at her words. You never intended to hurt Lucky. Your eyes followed her gaze to a photo on the wall. You remembered that day, barely. You were a different person then – human, physicist, powerless….

“That’s sad to hear. I hope to see him when we see Tony. And Bruce? How is Dr. Banner doing? Still getting angry and turning into the Pissed off Green Giant?” you asked with a perch of your eyebrow.

“He hasn’t hulked out as much as he used to. I’ve been helping him find ways to keep the big guy calm.” She looked over to you to see a change in your mood you seemed a bit down. “But I have heard him argue with the big guy a few times”

Your eyes lit up. “So, he still struggles with the Hulk, hmm? Hasn’t quite caged the beast?” you asked, a sparkle in your eyes.

She didn’t notice the change in your voice. “It’s a bit hard for him with how Shield has been keeping him in their radar lately. Hulk wants to go somewhere away from them and Bruce won’t allow it with the new advancements he’s made with reversing his mutation.” She walked back to the couch with some tea on the tray with some goodies.

“Oh, so you know where he is?” you asked while taking a cup of tea. “Would you be able to get him to the Tower? I’d love to see him.”

“Last I heard from him was a few weeks ago. Something about flying somewhere to find some sort of botanical garden that could help him.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I could always ask  JARVIS to locate him. That is assuming he still has the tracker on him.”

“A tracker? How… handy,” you mused. “Yes, I would very much like to know where Banner is at.”

“We can do that when we head to the tower. I haven’t had a chance to install the Al system into the apartment so I can get my documents sent from the lab here.” She pointed to the direction of the tower. “Did you ever get to defeat Sif or Thor from your training?”

A fond smile fell on your face for a moment. “As a matter of fact, I did. I beat every opponent I came against. I was able to trick Thor, mainly. The rest are just reliant on strength and speed.” You scoffed. “It takes so much more than that to win a war…”

She looked over and was unable to read your emotions. “What…what do you mean, Y/N? You didn’t go off to fight a war, did you?!” She became worried instantly.

You shook your head slightly at first. “No, well… not at first. No. Not intentionally. Don’t worry. I’m fine.” You flashed a smile at her but she wasn’t sold. Of course she wasn’t. She knew you too well and you hadn’t mastered the art of trickery – no, that was Loki’s forte.

“Is everything alright, Y/N/N? You seem a bit off, is there anything I could do? If you need to rest let me know. I’ll see if I can get the training room set for just us two and hopefully Stevie isn’t training in there.” She put her hand on your knee to comfort you.  

Her touch made you recoil violently. You couldn’t help it. The only person who could touch you without harming you was Loki.

“I’m sorry about that,” you said, trying to smooth your outfit and hair out. “What were you saying? Ah, yes. Rest. Shannon, I don’t think it’s me who needs the rest. Aren’t you a little tired?” You snapped your fingers once in front of her, hoping that would do the trick you needed.

Shannon saw the way you moved away from her touch and wanted to address it, but she yawned in an instant.

“Now that you say it, I am a bit tired, I haven’t slept well since you’ve been gone. I missed us having those late night chats.” She stretched. “I might go take a small nap before we leave, just a short nap I promise.” She smiled sweetly at you.

You nodded at her. “You do that, darling. I’ll be right here when you wake up,” you promised.

With that, Shannon stood up and walked back to her bedroom. When her door closed, you pulled out your phone and made a quick phone call, staring down the hall. “Yeah, I’ve got her. We’re halfway there.”

Unforseen Chasm Tag list- @reigningqueenofwords​ @oldfreakything​

Tag list- @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you​ @winchester-writes​ @winchesterenthusiast​ @georgialouisea​ @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog​  ​ @sammysbuttcheek​ @bran2015 @misz-adrii​ @sandlee44​ @womanxofletters​ @natsuccs​ @childishhoebinoo​ @depressed-moose-78 @expecteddifferent​ @girl-next-door-writes​ @fanaticfanfiction​ @dakotapaigelove​ @sassy-spn-knight-of-hell​ @weclassygirl​ @adefectivedetective​

[skymoonandstardust]

Imagine Steve  falling in love with you, an asgardian

Pairing: Steve x Fem Reader

An: Have some more Asgardian goodness with some Sweet Steve on the side my lovelies <3

Steve had seen, heard, lived though and defeated some pretty weird and strange things in his life. .  . .

Things that people from his time wouldn't have believed. 

Still, nothing--- not even the discovery that he’d been frozen for 70 years--- prepared him for the knowledge of Thor, Asgard and everything else.

When Fury had come walking into the gym and gave him the folder to look through he’d had no idea what was in store for him, the eye opening that was waiting about other worlds and beings like Thor. . . .and his sister, Y/N.

Of course the world already knew about the two of you.

How could it not, when you’d come down to Midgard with the warriors three to get your brother back and fight off the destroyer when Loki  sent it to the new Mexican town Thor’d ended up in?

That had made the news of course and all the reporters had gotten plenty of footage and pictures of the two of you-- along with the other four asgardians and it had spread everywhere in no time.

But Steve, just conscious again after being a popsicle, obviously missed the whole thing.

He hadn’t stumbled on anything to do with it and no one had said or mentioned anything about it. 

. . . so when he got to the file on Thor and you he was stunned.

 Apparently you were only a year or so younger then Thor  and an expert warrior, able to keep up with him easily. Gifted with some slight magic/illusion abilities like Loki and Frigga that made you even more skilled and dangerous, SHIELD had you labeled as a potential serious threat of you ever went rouge or joined the wrong side.

The personality assessment they had in there  though showed that to be a very slim possibility.

Steve was boggled by the sheer amount of information they had on you and thor and he had no idea how they’d been able to get it all. To be honest Cap wasn’t even sure why SHIELD included all the info since they seemed unsure whether either of you would even show up for this situation. 

Still, he wasn’t complaining. . . it was interesting.

And made Fury win his bet of five dollars.

 Whether you showed up or not, whether the other potential members showed up or not Steve knew what he had to do and made his decision.

He joined . . . and things got crazy, fast from there.

 Next thing he knew he was in Germany fighting a green and gold clad man with a gold antler helmet in the middle of a town square in Munich. 

They beat Loki naturally and were taking him to SHIEILD

. . . which is when you and Thor decided to show up.

He made his grand entrance obviously; calling up a lighting storm, landing on top of the jet, bursting in, taking loki and flying off. 

Meanwhile you stayed outside on the top of the jet till thor came out, then went after him-- and you were the only one smart enough to actually keep an eye on loki while Tony and your idot brother were duking it out. 

You liked Steve immediately when he put a stop to the fighting.

He was clearly the only male there in that situation who had any sense.

The two of you had a longer, more formal introduction after Thor decided to work with them for now and all of you headed on to the helicarrier.

Instantly you took a likening to Steve. You could tell already that he was a good, strong warrior with a kind heart and selfless soul-- and you found you were right the more time you spent with him, so you were honored to fight with him in the battle of New York.

Meanwhile the kid from Brooklyn was just a tad bit smitten with you, though he was so stoic he didn't let it show that much. 

Of course he was, you were beautiful, strong, smart and an actual goddess. . .

You could say you were pretty much perfect and the soldier found himself head over heels before he could stop himself.  

It’s not like he wanted  this to happen. He was still reeling in the modern age and getting over the fact that Peggy and everyone he knew was gone or pretty much as good as gone when it seemed like only yesterday that they were alive and young. It felt like a betrayal to her in a way to already be even somewhat attracted to someone else-- and with the whole immanent chatauri invasion Steve pushed the budding emotions down deep. 

After it was over you found yourself spending more time in Midgard-- and around a certain super-soldier in particular.

Your feelings for him only grew . . and so did his for you. 

Eventually you were named the official/unofficial  emissary between Midgard and asgard, just to explain and give you an excuse to spend nearly all your time on earth with Steve. 

He was glad that you and Thor were there to help with the Ultron problem though at that point he was most definitely in love with you (and you with him) and he was even more conflicted then ever about what to do about it. 

Civil war rolled around and with it came the death of Peggy, sending Steve's spiral of sadness and self doubt about you and his feeling even deeper.

At that point both of you knew how the other felt.

It was a silent unspoken fact 

Still, understanding a bit of the pain he felt (you’d lost your brother Loki  twice after all) you didn’t mention or say anything. you knew now wasn’t the time. Not with her death, not with potential Civil War. so you were there as his friend, supporting him and giving him words of comfort. 

Steve was more grateful for that then he could say. 

It may have only made him fall in love with you more. 

In the end the war stopped with Steve on the run, the rest of your Team captured and you sent back to Asgard-- Tony’s doing-- he used your status as princess of Asgard to swing Ross into believing you should be given back to them so they could decide what to do with you.

Like I said it worked, and after only a minor punishment of helping to defend a settlement on vanaheim (which you technically should have done away as princess and warrior) all was forgiven.

You were left to wonder what became of steve and what he was doing now. . . How the rest of your comrades during civil war were faring 

Though you also wondered about Odin’s slightly off behavior lately, which you had your suspicions about.

Little did you know you wouldn’t have time to wonder for long because soon Thor would return, unmask Odin as Loki and the three of you would be pulled into another crazy adventure that would  take your mind off of it all. . . before war would be upon you.

Bigger, worse, and more threatening then before.  

  The forevers: @casownsmyass  @docharleythegeekqueen @imadeangirl-butimsamcurious  @his-paradox @l4life @fangirl-who-dreams @sarciaczekk @esoltis280 @theresnofandomforthis  @laramitk @dragonangel-funandfire @a-sea-of-fandoms @thatbasicnerd4life @scarlettsoldier @cassiopeia-barrow

  Marvel girls: @a-girl-who-loves-disney @l4life   @thomashiddlestonloveloki @coltcas  @padfootsiriusorionblackthethird @escapingthoughtsandsecrets

[imagine-loki]

Dangerous Love

TITLE: Dangerous Love CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 43 AUTHOR: Pretty Dead Girl ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine that, when Loki comes to the tower, you fall in love with him even though you know you shouldn’t. Knowing that you are absolutely terrible at hiding your crush, you avoid him to not get into trouble. Everyone at the tower keeps away from him, but none avoid him as much as you do, and he gets curious. That’s how he finds out your little secret and he will no longer let you ignore him just like that. RATING: M Summary: Tony takes care of business and discovers shocking news while Thor and Astrid take on Loki in an attempt to stop him from ending the world, and a surprise visitor shows up to help Loki. Thor and Astrid went in search of Loki while Natasha, Clint, Wanda, Steve, and Bucky retreated back to Stark Tower. Tony, Vision, and Bruce, the three Avengers who were not wanted criminals, volunteered to stay and deal with the authorities. They didn’t usually stick around for this, but the battle against Eirik and his demons left Central Park littered with bodies, and without SHIELD, someone had to stay behind and explain why.

Another reason they remained behind- if not the most important reason- was to take care of Ragni’s body. She was to be taken care of first by the coroner, above all others. Tony would make sure of that. Sitting next to Ragni, Tony was grateful Vision and Bruce stayed off to the side and gave him a moment to grieve, alone.

The aching pressure in Tony’s chest was a constant reminder of how incredibly guilty he felt, unable to recall ever feeling this bad, and doing his best not to think about Loki or the fact that he was out there all alone while he slowly lost his mind with grief in the process. God, how could he be so fucking stupid? Unable to hold it in for a moment longer, Tony allowed himself to break down. He rocked back and forth, still wearing his helmet to hide the tears that he knew were coming, and started to sob. He grieved for both Ragni, the friend he’d already lost and Loki, the friend he was currently losing.

His sobs were just beginning to die down when F.R.I.D.A.Y. spoke up, “Sir, agent Barton is on the line. Would you like me to connect the call?” He started to say no, momentarily embarrassed for crying, then decided against it.

“Yeah,” Tony croaked, no longer caring that Barton would see his red-rimmed eyes once the call connected. He was, at least Tony assumed, currently dealing with his own grief. Mourning not only the loss of a friend but a woman he once loved- a woman he probably still held love for.

A moment later, Barton appeared on the screen. Judging by his long face, his lament was obvious. Wiping the tears from his own red-rimmed eyes, he drew a shuddered breath. “Hey, Tony,” he said quietly, voice wavering as he spoke.

Tony cleared his throat and gave him a small smile, “Hey there, Legolas. What’s up?“

“I called to let you know that Natasha managed to get in contact with Maria Hill and she’s sending a team via Quinjet.”

SHIELD coming to the rescue after being all but eliminated- Tony had a theory that SHIELD evolved from cockroaches; you couldn’t kill them no matter how hard you tried -should have surprised him; it didn’t. Not even a little bit.

“Natasha briefed Hill and her team about what went down earlier and while they shouldn’t have any questions, expect them. They will, without a shadow of a doubt, ask about Nick. SHIELD- what’s left of them anyway -is having a difficult time coming to terms with the fact that he willingly joined forces with HYDRA-demons and left us with no other choice than to eliminate him.” At that, Tony furrowed a brow. “We decided to omit the part where Loki murdered Fury in cold blood. So instead, we told Hill that he was killed during the battle. You never know how SHIELD is going to react. While there’s a chance they will say nothing since Fury was technically a HYDRA-demon or whatever, there is also a good chance that they will do something. Claim that since he was in our custody they could have brought him in and ‘cured’ him. But we also would have had to have known SHIELD was still around. Still, I figure better safe than sorry.”

“Good idea.” The last thing they needed to do was give SHIELD a reason to go after Loki. Especially now. Now really wasn’t the best time for that.

Tony had just finished explaining- the Fury, Loki story change -situation to Bruce and Vision when SHIELD arrived. There were at least twelve agents that Tony could see, none that he recognized, scattered all over the park like roaches. He refused to stray too far from Ragni’s body- there was no telling what SHIELD would do with it -and veered away any agents who stepped too close. He figured the coroner would have been here by now, assuming they didn’t need a reasonable time frame to work with since what they were picking up wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. Still, the thought pissed him off. He decided if they hadn’t shown up within the next twenty minutes he would take her himself.

Five minutes later, Tony saw a ghost.

“You’re dead,” he stuttered, shaking his head and rubbing his eyes (he’d finally managed to remove his helmet) blinking several times before he decided that either A. he was dreaming or B. he had somehow died and not realized it.

“Am I?” The man known as Phil Coulson replied and quirked an eyebrow in Tony’s direction.

“You were dead. They said you were dead.” Tony stopped himself before he blurted, Loki killed you!

“Huh, guess it didn’t take,” he shrugged indifferently and then smiled. “It’s nice to see you, Tony.”

Well shit! Tony mused to himself. Coulson really was here. Standing in front of him. Alive and, well… Alive. Thank God. He thought he was going crazy there for a minute and he really didn’t want to see another shrink.

“Yeah, you too, dude. Wow. I can’t believe you’re really here. Wait, why didn’t I know that you were alive before now? Does anyone else know? Clint? Natasha? Steve?”

“Not yet, but I plan on revealing myself to them very soon. I’ve been kinda sorta undercover for the past two and a half years. Knowing I’m alive is… Well, it’s a need to know basis,” he explained.

“Sounds, uh, cool.”

“Mhm,” Coulson hummed and pulled out his cell phone, but Tony knew better - that it wasn’t any ordinary cell phone. Not when it came to Phil Coulson and SHIELD. “Now, tell me,” he spoke, gravely, “Exactly, what happened here?”

****

Who knew that New York’s Central Park had its very own satanic temple? It was no wonder Eirik and his demons gathered there. Loki knew the place would still be crawling with mortals and decided to continue his plans the following night. When the time came the park was exactly as needed; empty.

He didn’t even notice that he stopped to stare at the ground until he realized the spot he was subconsciously looking at. Ignoring the stabbing pain in his chest he continued through the park until he reached the center, the satanic temple lying below. He had every intention of bringing the temple to the surface, where he planned to use the earth’s energy to trigger Ragnarok, beginning with Midgard. Once he was finished, he would travel back to Asgard and fulfill the promise he’d made to Odin.

Closing his eyes, he held out both hands and focused his energy, and within moments the ground beneath him started to shake as the temple rose to the earth’s surface. The main spire of the temple bore the effigy of the demon herself, Lexiyah; the demon of destruction and death. Once above ground, Loki relaxed and then focused once more. The air crackled around him as he poured the earth’s energy into the temple that would eventually trigger a catastrophic event. He truly believed it was better this way, for all of them. There would be no more pain, no more suffering, only peace.

“Loki, stop!” A familiar voice came from behind him and Loki rolled his eyes.

Dammit, Thor. Not now!

“Loki, no!” Another voice, one he recognized to be Astrid.

Dammit to hell!

He really didn’t have time to end the world and deal with them. Why couldn’t Thor and Astrid just leave him alone? - leave him be, and just let him do what needed to be done.

***

Loki ignored his pleas, leaving Thor with no choice but to use Mjolnir, and chucked the hammer at his brother. He, of course, made sure the hit wasn’t fatal or really even enough to hurt him, he simply knocked Loki off balance just enough for him to lose his focus. When he regained his footing, Loki glared daggers at Thor before sending a blast of energy in his direction, hitting him, and knocking him back several feet where he landed not so gracefully on his ass.

“Dammit, Loki! That actually hurt!” Thor hissed through gritted teeth, slowly working his way back on his feet. “Loki, you need to stop this madness!”

“Do I? Do I!” He yelled, hitting Thor with another blast of powerful (and very painful) magic, knocking him back to the ground.

“Stop, Loki! You’re hurting him,” Astrid screamed and stepped between them. “Please, you need to stop. This isn’t the way!”

“How would you know!” Loki roared and then hit her with the same blast he hit Thor with.

“Shit! Fuck, that smarts!” She cried, staring at Loki with pleading eyes. “Please, please, Loki. Just stop.”

“I can’t, don’t you see? It’s better this way.”

****

“Please, you must send me back now! I’m the only one who can stop this!” She shouted. “You must send me back!”

“It can be done, but understand, that if you choose to leave you can never return, your fate will lie elsewhere.” A large, dark-skinned man with yellow eyes explained.

“I understand,” she nodded.

"Knowing this, have you reached a decision?”

“I have.” Frigga stood and approached the guardian. “I choose to go back. My son, my Loki needs me, as does the fate of the nine realms.

"Then by the order of the guardians, Frigga Odinson, you are hereby exiled from Valhalla.”

***

Thor and Astrid were on the ground and barely conscious. He couldn’t remember Loki’s magic blasts ever hitting this hard, but considering his new found power, courtesy of Odin and the hidden vault filled with dangerous books of magic (Yes, he knew about that, having arrived on Asgard an hour too late) Loki’s magic was a lot more powerful, but also a lot more unpredictable.

It also occurred to him that Loki may have never actually tried to hurt him before using magic. At least, not until now. But what made the situation worse was that he was hurting Astrid too; his best friend, without a single regard for her welfare. Little by little Loki’s humanity slipped away. If they kept this up Thor was sure the magic would kill both Astrid and himself. It would take a while, but Loki would inevitably kill them if he continued down this road.

“Loki…” Thor tried again, unable to form the words he wanted. “…Stop.”

“I will, brother,” Loki told him. “But only if you stop trying to stop me.”

“You know that I cannot do that.”

“Then I cannot stop. Not until you’re dead.” Hitting Thor with another blast Loki rendered him unconscious.

“Loki, think about what you’re doing!” Astrid attempted to reason. “You can’t kill your brother and you can’t end the world!” She met his eyes and her bottom lip quivered. “You can’t kill me.”

“I can,” he said simply. “And I will, whether it be now or during Ragnarok, you will perish. Now choose.” Loki demanded. “You die now or later, which is it?”

“I won’t let you do this,” she choked, shaking her head. “I won’t.”

“Then you die now,” he declared. “But because you are my friend, I’ll make sure you don’t feel a thing.”

Snapping his fingers, he placed Astrid in a deep sleep and readied himself creating a larger, more powerful, ball of energy that he planned to use to finish them off. Then suddenly, he heard another familiar voice calling out to him. It didn’t take long for him to realize that the voice he was hearing was a voice he shouldn’t have been able to hear. Because the voice was coming from someone who was dead.

Frigga was dead.

“Loki.”

But she wasn’t dead. She was here, now, standing in front of him. Was he seriously hallucinating now? He had to be.

“Loki, my son.” Frigga gave a small smile. “I need you to come back to me.”

“Come back, what do you mean?” He asked skeptically.

“Your humanity slips away, I sense it. You must fight to get it back.”

“I don’t want it back,” he growled. “It makes the pain easier to handle if I seal it away.”

“Loki-”

“You aren’t real, you can’t be! Frigga… my mother is dead.”

“I was dead and now I am not, but I’m real Loki. I’m right here.”

“But how?”

“That isn’t important right now,” she told him. “What’s important is that you stop this. Do you truly wish to destroy a world that your mother resides on? Would it be so easy for you to kill me?”

“What, no!” Loki stressed. “I would never harm you, you know that!”

“Yes, I do know that,” Frigga said softly and took a few steps toward her youngest son.

“…You’re really here?” He asked so softly, so pitifully, it broke Frigga’s heart. He still wasn’t sure if she was truly here.

“Yes, Loki. I’m really here.”

Releasing the magical energy, Loki let it fall into nothing and stood as still as a statue (probably with his mouth gaped open) as Frigga approached him.

This couldn’t be real; it had to be a dream.

…His mother was dead.

“Mother?”

The word comes out broken as it finally hits him, losing what little composure he had left. Sobbing, Loki falls to his knees and Frigga knelt down beside him, taking him into her arms much like she did when he was a small child and embraced him. And he lets her. He lets her hold him as if he were a child, enjoying the comfort and presence of his mother; something that he’d missed very much.

“Everything is so screwed up,” Loki choked. “I lost… I lost her and I don’t know what to do.”

“Don’t worry my sweet boy, mother’s here now,” she assured him, running her fingers through his hair. “You mustn’t go through with what you’re trying to do, Loki. I know that you’re hurting and I know you long for death. I know exactly what you’ve lost and for that I’m sorry, but please, Ragni wouldn’t want you to do this.”

“You knew Ragni?”

“I knew of her. I watched you Loki and that girl loved you, I could see that clearly. She wouldn’t want this and deep down you know it too. If not for me, do it for her - promise me you won’t do this, that you’ll stop and come back to me. If you let me I can help you.”

After several minutes of silence, Loki reluctantly agreed, “Alright.”

“You can try but I swear mother if I cannot find something to numb the pain - stop this constant ache in my chest - and soon, I won’t last much longer and it won’t matter how badly I want to live because the grief will kill me. I can already feel it.”

****

“How long is he going to be gone?”

If Tony wasn’t depressed before he sure as hell was depressed now.

They’d found Loki, but his mother had returned from the grave (holy shit, what’s with all the dead rising?!) deciding that it was best she take Loki away for a couple of months while she helped him manage (and hopefully) remedy his grief. Now he stood in the living room with a girl he didn’t know but didn’t care because his only concern was for Loki.

“Couple of months,” Astrid shrugged. “Three at the most. Frigga thinks a change of scenery might help instead of staying here where everything reminds him of her. I’m sure it’s hard either way.”

“I’m sure it is,” he nodded. “Wait, Ragni’s funeral is the day after tomorrow. Loki’s going to miss it?”

She nodded sadly. “Yeah. When he gets back we can show him her gravesite. Loki’s having a hard time focusing on anything other than not losing his mind and/or humanity right now.”

“I can’t even imagine what he’s going through.” Tony sighed and sat down on the couch.

“You couldn’t, it’s so much worse because of the bond,” she mumbled and joined Stark on the couch. “We have to do something. He can’t just stay this way. I have a lot of faith in Frigga, but even I don’t think she can work around this kind of magic.”

That was discouraging, if the Allmother couldn’t even save the day.

“So what do we do?” Tony asked.

“The only thing that we can do.” Astrid took a deep breath and stared Tony Stark directly in the eyes. “We’re going to bring Ragni back.”

Author notes: I am so sorry this took so damn long. I forgot how to write and I’ve also been dealing with personal problems. I’ll do my best and try not to take so long for the next update.

[scriptureofashes]

(Not) Sorry

Based on this. (@crazypantsjewels)

Somebody kill me.

Tony groaned into what was probably a pillow. His body hurt everywhere, shoulders stiff and back screaming in hellish pain. For a brief moment, it felt like those times in Afghanistan, where he had all but a nice and dusty floor to sleep on, but the warm leg twisted over his accompanied by soft snoring rushed the panic away before it could even peek out.

"Friday, remind me why I made the terrible decision of sleeping on this horrid couch," he grumbled. His joints screeched at him as he sat up. I. Am. Old.

"Because you and Mr. Parker decided to play Mario Kart at 11:07 pm and fell asleep at 3:42 am, right before your character was thrown off Rainbow Bridge."

Oh, right.

“Wait, what? He threw me off?” Tony glared at the kid sprawled out on the narrow end of the orange couch. “Little shit. I picked Yoshi and he got jealous.”

“I told you to choose the purple one.”

“What the everloving—”

Tony shifted his glare over the back of the couch. Loki’s returning stare was of amusement.

“Jesus, that’s it! I’m gonna buy you a bell,” Tony stated. He gently lifted Peter’s scrawny leg from his knee and stretched – ow pain, ow pain, said his muscles – before getting off the couch. His gaming remote tumbled to the floor. “And you wanted me to pick Waluigi. Waluigi. Friendship revoked.”

Loki huffed, stabbing at his half-frozen waffles. He was still trying to figure out how some things were supposed to be food and seemed pretty keen on getting to understand. Even if sometimes it made him beyond irritated. He did not understand toast, for example. Or tacos. Or cheesecake. Or cookies. Or pop-tarts, definitely not pop-tarts, which had made for entertaining debates with Thor.

Tony snorted at his bemused expression. “Just pour some milk and granola on a bowl before you give yourself an aneurysm.”

“Your ‘milk’ is fowl.”

“Oh great, another one who thinks milk is murder. You gonna tell me the Earth is flat, too?”

“What? Quit speaking nonsense, Man of Iron.”

“You already working on your anti-vaccination petitions?”

Tony felt more than saw Bruce opening the fridge behind him, probably to dig out the eggs and the milk in question. He always made pancakes for breakfast when he was around in the mornings. Speaking of which…

“Friday, give me hours.”

“8:50 in the morning, boss.”

Cripes.

Vision’s hand suddenly stretched out to grab Loki’s uneaten plate of (mashed) waffles and started to bring out pots and pans to help with breakfast. Water was already boiling on the stove and Tony could bet that was Bruce’s tea.

“I think what Loki means is that he doesn’t really like milk,” Bruce said.

“Sacrilege.” Loki’s eye-roll was so damn near perfect, Tony envied it. He turned to the living room. “Up and at it, Spidey. You’re late for school. Don’t want Aunt May on my ass again.”

There was a low, dragged out groan from the occupied couch, a flash of feet – one with the sock on and the other in a sneaker – and Peter was up. Tired and disoriented, but still up. Maskless, even. Took him a while, but he’d finally decided at least some of the Avengers should know who he was in case of emergency. And what better half of the Avengers than the ones that were legal?

Discounting Loki, but Loki... was Loki.

“I was under the idea that schools closed during weekends,” Vision mused, closing a cabinet.

Bruce smiled at him when Tony raised an eyebrow, that exasperated yet fond smile he had really missed. “Tony, it’s Saturday.”

“Oh. Is it?”

“Yes, boss.”

Damn, I am really off track.

“False alarm, kid. Go to your room, catch some Z's. Or would you rather I drive you back home? I’m sure May will want to check up on you.”

Peter yawned in response and sat on his self-claimed bar stool. It was his favorite spot in the kitchen, for some reason. Did a lot of homework there, listening to Tony and Bruce’s heated science arguments. Tony supposed it was because of the vents’ entrance right over it. Easy access to a tall, dark place and whatnot. Freaking spiders and their spider-lings.

It also reminded him of someone who had a bad habit of sneaking around in vents and he didn’t know how to feel about that.

“Nah, I’m good, Mr. Stark. I wanna be awake for… you know.”

Tony watched him rub his eyes, and for a brief moment, was reminded of how young he was. “For what? Adventure Time reruns?”

All noise in the kitchen stopped at his words. Even Loki wasn’t unperturbed.

“Uh, no…?” Peter frowned at him. “Mr. Stark, you do know what day today is, right?”

“Is it your birthday? Shit I thought I had that memorized already—”

“It’s the fourteenth,” Bruce enlightened. He kept cracking the eggs, but his tone was clipped.

Vision didn’t look much better. “Today, the once fugitive team of former Avengers returns to the country, in order to sign the renewed Accords.”

Shit. Shit.

Rain poured outside when Team Iron Man (plus the Hulk, Thor and Loki) were ready and assembled in the common room of the Avengers facility. The TV was on, switched to some news channel, a weatherman describing the exact storm going outside.

Tony wouldn’t’ve had it more cliche than this. Yes, morning started out as beautiful as his mood. Yes, now the rain mirrored how drastically it had shifted. You’re kidding me. He was half inclined to dump the tea he was holding on one of the Asgard brothers, considering they were the closest things to gods he had in his life. And who do you curse when shit happens? Exactly.

2:49 pm, his wristwatch read. Eleven minutes. Eleven minutes until those doors opened.

Natasha stood against one of the kitchen counters. As always, her red hair was perfect and her leather jacket was immaculate. She’d arrived at two o’clock sharp and had barely said a word since then. Tony was actually thankful for that. He was not in the mood to get into a discussion about his so called ego and the consequences if often arose.

He was already feeling like shit (read: self-conscious and scared as fuck) enough as it was.

He glanced at his reflection on the mirror across the room. Ergo. Slim-fit Hugo Boss, black, an indigo-blue tie snug around his neck and tucked into the vest. Blue tinted Armani shades to hide his ever so permanent bags. Look your best when you’re at your worst.

“… So I take the tank, drop it right off at the general's palace, drop it at his feet. I'm like, ‘Boom, are you looking for this?’"

“I once did something like that!”

Tony smiled at the sight of Peter and Rhodey, on the couch, laughing and sharing crime-fighting stories. He knew the kid did a lot that the Colonel didn’t, but his enthusiasm didn’t seem deterred. Quality trait inc: humility.

“He’s a good kid.”

Tony looked at Natasha for a moment. Her green eyes were searching.

“He is.”

It was followed by the same silence it had hung in the air until then. 2:52. She pushed herself off the counter, arms still crossed, and rounded the kitchen island to stand closer to Tony. He had the sudden impulse to activate his emergency wrist repulsor and blast her back to where she was before. He sipped at the cup of tea Bruce had brewed for him instead.

“How did you convince him to stick around?”

Here we go.

“I didn’t.”

He saw her raised eyebrow from the corner of his eye.

“That’s an ominous reply.”

Look who’s talking, he wanted to say, but he was still not in the mood for this kind of self-destructive discussions. Checking his watch again – 2:53 – he moved closer to Peter and Rhodey, taking a seat on one of the other couches and blatantly disregarding Natasha’s irked expression.

Thor and Vision were already engaged in a conversation, something about the stone in his head again – reasonable, it pertained to the reason Team Cap was signing the Accords – and Loki, fully dressed in his Asgardian drapes like his brother, fiddled with his scepter on the other end of the same couch Tony and Bruce sat on. The good doctor seemed to be avoiding Natasha’s presence as well. Kind of ironic – he’d somehow made peace with a Norse god who had wanted to unleash the Hulk and spread terror, but he refused to talk to the woman he’d once had a chance with.

“You’re not gonna catch up?” Tony asked, pointing at the aforementioned redhead with his teacup.

“We already did.”

“… And?”

Well, it was a matter of time before I lost him, too.

“And nothing, Tony.” Bruce clasped his hands, taking a deep breath. “Indeed, I wouldn’t have signed the Accords at all when this whole fiasco went down. You know what went on between me and Ross. With him in control? Never.”

“Right—”

“But I never would have fought you, either.”

Tony could only stare. Bruce’s mouth quirked in a faint smile.

“The Other Guy wouldn’t have, I mean. Not you.”

“But you did sign the Accords. And you’re here.”

“Yes, because you were in charge, this time,” Bruce said. “I trust you, Tony. If you were the one to amend and dictate the main rules for the Accords, then I know it’s something safe for me to sign.”

“You don’t know that—”

“Yes, I do.”

Tony bit his lower lip, gulping. He was… at a loss for words. Something that happened once in a fucking blue moon.

He cleared his throat. “So, what? She thinks you shouldn’t have signed them?”

“No, Tony, she betrayed you.” Tony’s head swiveled so fast he almost got whiplash. “She was supposed to help you and she turned on you without good reason. That bothers me.”

“Really? Bros before hoes, you’re gonna go with that argument?”

Bruce laughed, and Tony smiled. It sounded damn good, especially after the hell that had transpired. Silence fell upon them again, but it wasn’t the awkward type anymore.

“You were just trying to make sure no more fatal casualties happened. And because Steve has trust issues—”

“Not to mention his undying love for Barnes—”

“Rhodey,” Tony deadpanned. Peter was snickering behind the mask.

“And because Steve has trust issues with the government,” Bruce continued, louder, despite his own smile, “And his own morals, he couldn’t compromise. Even though he should have, for the collective good he claims to fight for.”

“You’re kind of contradicting yourself there, Brucey, you too have issues with the government—”

“I had issues with the government. Which you managed to solve. Through your supervised Accords. And you managed to ditch Ross, too.”

“Well, it was nothing, you know, I...”

“The last time we engaged in a significant conversation,” Loki suddenly said, scepter gone, “You radiated threat. You spoke proudly, confidently. You strutted. What extinguished that fire, Stark?”

The answer came in form of more silence, thick and tense. Tony let the question turn rhetorical, let the others assume it was the Civil War some of them had not been present for.

Nobody knew about Siberia and Tony intended to keep it that way.

“Boss.”

“Yes?”

“They’re here.”

Oh, God. Indeed, the clock read 3:00 pm.

There was a collection of eye-contact amongst the group, before they all, slowly and grudgingly, stood. Tony could already feel the tell-tale signs in his chest of a panic reaction – his shield hit the arc reactor – and the sudden lack of oxygen worsened at the sight of shut windows – he was going to kill me.

He was going to kill me.

A small hand – well, smaller than his – touched his shoulder, and Tony was met with the concerned look of Spider-Man’s mask. Immediately, his chest loosened a tad. Peter was young, so young, but he looked out for Tony like nobody else did. Different from yet alike to Pepper and Rhodey.

With everybody but Bruce and Rhodey with their backs to them, Peter took the chance to hug him tightly, like Tony was anchoring him. How is this kid even real? He hugged back, hesitant and awkward – like that would ever change – but tears were already pin-pricking at his eyes, and he so did not need that now.

“Alright, kiddo, we’ve been over this, I don’t do hugs,” he said, but his voice cracked and outed him. Rhodey looked at him like he wanted to haul him over his back and take him out of there. Tony wasn’t opposed, but unlike some people, he fulfilled his duties.

Peter pulled away, nodding his head, Spider-Man eyes still conveying worry, but he made his way to the entrance hall to greet the incoming team, where everybody was already standing. Tony took a deep breath.

“Tony,” Bruce whispered, because Friday had turned off the TV and there was the familiar, metallic whirring of the doors opening down the hall. “Tea.”

Right. Tony took a gulp of it, a big one, shared a nod with Bruce, and placed himself on the middle-front spot the group had left for him. Next to Peter and Bruce, and far away from Natasha. Perfect.

For a moment there was just silence, the anticipating kind. Then, to join the sound of heavy breathing, came steps, multiple steps, echoing over the tall walls and ceilings, growing closer and closer and closer. Peter’s breath hitched next to him – spider senses – and there were shadows to match those steps, until—

T’Challa came first. He was in his civvies, not even in a suit, and that sort of eased Tony a little, seeing how comfortable the wakandan felt towards him. After all, he was the one Tony had been communicating with when the Thanos dilemma called for one last Assemble, the one he had discussed Accords matters with, the one who hadn’t gone against his choices on said Accords and merely relayed Team Cap’s conditions with neutrality. They weren’t exactly friends, but they weren’t enemies either, so Tony’s returning smile to the king was nothing if not genuine.

The rest of them trailed right after him. They all came. Wilson, Barton, Lang. Maximoff. She looked poised, self-assured even. She tried to meet his eyes, defiant as ever, but the two members that came last required more of his attention than a spoiled, insolent teenager did.

He had a beard. Tony almost didn’t recognize him, but where there was a one-armed, rumpled up soldier, there was Rogers. Out of all of them, he was the one Tony forced himself to make eye-contact with.

I’ll be damned if I ever give him the satisfaction of watching me suffer.

Rogers eyed him back with a strange expression in those blue eyes, like forlorn and fond at the same time, and Tony really didn’t know what to make of that.

There was a moment where nobody said anything – nobody knew what to say – but Tony was Tony.

“Did you have a disagreement with the Gillette corporation?” he blurted. Nice going. “That’s one hell of a bird’s nest, Rogers.”

In all fairness, he expected the indignation that crossed most of their faces, like they didn’t think he’d ever be so disrespectful towards the captain. He did not expect Rogers’ answering chuckle.

“Months of exile in Africa will do that to you.” Tony didn’t reply. “I can see you yourself look as prim as ever.”

Tony gave him his best press smile, but he still said nothing. He was upright and still on sheer concentrated power of will, otherwise he’d have already spun on his heels and legged it. Flashes of a red, white and blue shield aiming for his head came to mind, and he had to take a deep breath in order to not accidentally call for the suit.

“You didn’t call,” Rogers stated. Ah.

“I’m allergic to outdated technology.”

Behind him, Rhodey coughed to hide his laugh. Rogers’ reaction wasn’t nearly as pleased. He broke eye-contact, and for a moment, Tony managed to breathe.

He nodded at Bruce. “Dr. Banner.”

“Captain Rogers.”

“Mr. Stark,” T’Challa begun. Tony turned to him. “I would like to thank you for your efforts to finally bring us all into agreement regarding the Accords, and for housing us despite—”

“What the fuck.”

Tony almost jumped at the sheer rage in Barton’s voice. The archer strode forward, past Wilson and now next to Barnes – who still looked like he’d rather be anywhere than here, and Tony kind of related to him at the moment – and pointed an accusing finger at someplace to the right.

“What. Is. He. Doing. Here.”

Loki raised his eyebrows, but other than that, he didn’t react. Nobody took the initiative to reply. Really.

“He’s reinforcement.”

Barton’s glare was piercing. “Reinforcement. Nat, how the fuck did you allow this?”

“I wasn’t consulted,” Natasha replied. Her coldness was obviously not directed at the archer.

The entirety of Team Cap, excluding T’Challa, looked affronted. Rogers was no longer attempting to look amiable, steel gaze and furrowed brows in place.

“You called Loki as reinforcement?” he accused. His voice was chilling. “Stark.”

“You were made aware of our circumstances, Rogers. We need all the power we can get—”

“So you decided to recruit a mentally unstable, reckless murderer to protect the planet he once wanted to destroy?” Maximoff spat. “Oh wait, that makes sense.”

Rhodey bristled. Deep breaths, Tony reminded himself, wanting to crawl into a hole and die.

“How on Earth were you put in charge of the Accords, Stark?” Lang scorned.

“You don’t get to say anything, you don’t even know what you’re here for!” Peter shouted, angrier than Tony ever heard him.

Deep breaths.

“You’re one to talk, how old are you?! Twelve?!” Wilson retorted. “You’re a kid and he dragged you into this mess!”

“I’m sixteen, asshole, and I’m here because I want to! Don’t you dare bring Mr. Stark into this!”

Deep breaths.

“Loki has redeemed himself in our eyes—” Thor tried to explain, but nobody was listening.

“You brought a sixteen year old into this?!” Rogers barked.

“He’s here on his own, Steve, calm down,” Bruce defended, already looking a little green.

Deep breaths.

“See? See?” Barton turned to Rogers, finger now pointing at Tony. “I told you we shouldn’t trust him. We should never have trusted him in the first place, not after these goddamned Accords, not after Ultron, not even for the Avengers initiative! He doesn’t care how he fucked me up, he makes me team up with that alien fucker, after everything he did to us, after everything he did to me, like the soulless bastard he is—”

Deep—fuck no, what.

“Oh, does it bother you that I allowed someone who fucked with your mind onto our team without asking you if you were okay with it first?” Tony snapped, switching eye-contact between Barton and Maximoff. 

Everybody froze at his words, suddenly and slowly realizing their meaning as they saw who he was glaring at.

Are. You. Kidding. Me. He turned to Rogers, who was wide eyed and speechless, all the ice and cold of Siberia in his eyes.

“So, so sorry.”

He slowly sipped the rest of his tea, watching their mixed reactions of anger, confusion and dawning realization. He smiled.

“I trust you’re all familiar with the accommodations, but if I were you, I wouldn’t get too comfy.”

With that, he turned on his heel, handed Vision the empty cup, and did what he needed to do since he first heard these traitors were coming back: he got the hell out of there.

He could swear Bruce was smirking when he left.