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gwyvian · 7 years

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Resistances and Dalliances

Chapter 10: Arcus Drift

“Let’s go over that again,” Saar said, reproachful eyes beginning to weary a little from all the questioning, but still far too full of determination to keep them sitting there till only bones remained. “What is your military strength?”

“We are not a military force,” Ryder repeated by rote. “We have the Nexus, which won’t move. We have arks. They do not have huge guns. We have the Tempest. Again, no big guns. It’s literally parked on your doorstep. There is nothing else we have that could even approach a military force strong enough to threaten the angara.”

“A ship from where your team mysteriously vanished,” Saar pointed out.

��I didn’t exactly break them out from my cell, now did I?” Ryder asked dully.

Saar harrumphed. “The Nexus must be your staging base, you must have more forces there that you didn’t tell us about.”

Ryder leaned back in her chair and covered her face with her hands. Three days. They were days measured in Aya’s time to be sure, but still she had suffered three days of endless questions, prodding, glares and occasional peaceful moments in her cell that she was beginning to cherish. Of course, she would have gone mad there had it not been for SAM.

Being cut off from news was a million times worse than the isolation, though Evfra did put in an appearance here and there. He was too busy to do more than reiterate that everything was fine and outright war hadn’t broken out between the Initiative and the angara yet, but he was increasingly recalcitrant with how much information he was willing to share. Maybe he just spent too much time talking with his lieutenants over the information she gave them and he was beginning to see her in that light once more.

“What is the Nexus’ weakpoint?” Saar asked, sighing in exasperation.

Ryder let her hands fall, staring at the ceiling. “Saar, do you ever tire of asking me the same questions? All the others have managed to field some pretty intelligent ones, but you…”

“I will stop asking them when you start answering honestly,” Saar growled.

“But how do you know I’m not being honest if you just disbelieve everything I say on principle?” Why did it have to be Saar this morning that got her interview time…

“Enough, Saar,” Evfra called over from behind his desk. “Even my mind is beginning to ache from your questions.”

“Thank you,” Ryder mouthed at him gratefully.

Saar stood reluctantly, grimacing at Ryder and – much more warily – radiating mild disapproval towards Evfra. He did as asked, though. Around Ryder commanders and fighters milled about, some reporting directly to Evfra and others coordinating teams, still others just standing around chatting, but no matter how busy it got there, somehow she felt alone the moment her questioning ended. She had a small table with two chairs set on either side in an out of the way spot near to the Resistance leader’s desk and, so far, every day she had sat through similar interviews with Evfra’s lieutenants and grudgingly had divulged a great deal about the Initiative’s motivations and composition in terms of personnel and objectives; otherwise the angara left her alone.

Evfra didn’t coordinate the time and rotation for the interviews, perhaps because he didn’t want to show too much interest in her publicly, but Ryder was beginning to feel a little hard done by when it came to their agreement, even though Evfra had made good on his promise and smuggled her team off Aya in a way that couldn’t be connected to either one of them. Sometimes she spent time gazing at the angara around her, wondering if one of them had been one of Evfra’s confidants who had spirited the Tempest crew away. She would have killed to hear from any one of her team right about now, so she could finally continue the investigation. One thing was for sure; she had to get out of the Resistance headquarters and somehow get Evfra to come with her. It wasn’t exactly an intuition, but she increasingly felt like events were slipping out from between her fingers the longer she dallied here.

“Any chance of food?” Ryder asked Evfra. She wasn’t sure she was too fond of nutrient paste, but it was made quite clear to her that she should be glad they fed her in the first place, so she did not complain. Idly she wondered who would be interviewing her next and what new surprising question they would come up with.

Evfra grimaced. “That’s the third time you’ve asked since this morning.”

Ryder shrugged. “Guess I’m hungry for… something.” She grinned when Evfra’s fingers slipped on the datapad he had been holding and he almost dropped it. The glare he gave her was anything but amiable, but she enjoyed tormenting him occasionally, guiltily hoping that maybe she might pressure him into giving her more than a gruff word or two exchanged in haste.

A small commotion at the door made them break eye contact and an unfamiliar angara walked in, though he was clearly known and liked by many others, judging by the numerous greetings he received. He had striking eyes that she couldn’t quite get a good look at from that distance, set in a scarred face that was actually close to Evfra’s, although somehow entirely different; she had a feeling this angara at least was a cheerful one.

“Mashiar,” Evfra said in surprise. “Why did you come in person?”

“I bring news I think you’ll want to see, Evfra,” Mashiar said in the accents of Voeld, smiling widely at Ryder as he passed her corner. As he reached Evfra’s desk, he handed a datapad to the Resistance leader. “We gunned down a ship a few days ago. It seems it was Initiative, although we have never seen anything like it before. We had to defend ourselves at the time, but when word came from you that we should have waited… Anjik sent me to report in person, to see what you wanted to do. We didn’t want to send the message so as not to spread the word, so here I am.”

A ball of ice formed in Ryder’s stomach as she listened. Evfra cursed, snatching the datapad and began pouring over it, his expression thunderous to say the least. Remarkably, Mashiar didn’t seem too affected by the grim displeasure radiating from the Resistance leader. In fact, while he waited for Evfra to finish his reading, he unexpectedly walked back to Ryder and took the interviewer’s seat across from her, smiling at her.

“So you’re our alien prisoner?” he asked. His tone was light and pleasant, positively melodic compared to Evfra’s low growl, but most of all Ryder was relieved to see a complete absence of hostility or suspicion in his face. He studied her in fascination with those colorful eyes, but it wasn’t anywhere near the unpleasant dissection that she was becoming accustomed to from Evfra’s lieutenants.

“Pathfinder,” Ryder corrected automatically. The man’s sudden laugh was rich and she found herself blushing.

“Pathfinder, of course! Tell me, are all members of your species so beautiful?”

Ryder stared at him disbelievingly. He was… flirting with her? “Uh… I guess that’s a matter of taste,” she said weakly. “Humans tend to look very different from one another; and other Milky Way species are very different from us.”

“I see! Well, I know I like you already,” he laughed again. After a moment, he reached out a hand, palm upwards. “May I look at your hand?” he asked.

Ryder, his blood pressure and heart rate rose when you named yourself as the Pathfinder, SAM intoned and Ryder dearly wished she could respond; that was interesting. He was obviously interested in her, yet he reacted more to that name for some reason.

“I… suppose so,” she reached out a hand and let Mashiar take it, puzzled.

She blushed again, clearing her throat as he curiously slid his fingers between her little finger and ring finger, then traced the rest of them in a similar fashion from her fingertips to her wrist. He leaned closer to examine them with eyes that reminded her of a tousled oak tree now that she saw them up close, with a storm of flecks of deep green in a glittering swirl of brown. Suddenly smiling in satisfaction, he straightened, eyes locking with hers.

“You are truly fascinating, Pathfinder! Tell me, now that you have been among us for a time, have you ever considered bonding with an angaran? Or does your species discourage that?”

“I… I’m not really looking for anyone at the moment,” Ryder stammered. The man was blunt; and charmingly so, she thought with an inward groan. It took all her concentration not to look at Evfra, but she could feel his glare on them and she wished he would put a stop to this before she utterly embarrassed herself for fear of revealing her feelings for the obnoxious man. She very much wanted to snatch her hand back, but Mashiar’s hand swallowed hers, clearly intending to hold onto it.

“So I have a chance!” he laughed.

“I don’t think I’m in a position to start dating right now,” she said, trying to evade. Maybe if she lied and said she already had a relationship? Then he would want to know who, probably, and she wasn’t prepared to invent a whole new person to fit the role.

“What is this… dating?” Mashiar’s eyes lit up and he leaned close enough that she caught his spicy scent. “Do you think we would enjoy it if we tried it?”

“Commander,” Evfra cut in coldly, “let go of her.”

Mashiar stood, but did not let go of Ryder’s hand. “Respectfully, Evfra, why should I?”

“Because she’s not here for you to fling your attentions at, she is here to give us information and nothing more,” Evfra said.

“Does she not get a say in that?” Mashiar frowned, glancing back down at Ryder as if seeking confirmation. “I think she likes me. You do, don’t you?” he frowned at her almost anxiously, yet somehow managed to wrap it in a mischievous grin that caught her completely off guard.

Ryder just gaped at them both for a moment. “I uh… I take no offense in the interest, but I really am not looking for… that sort of thing,” she managed, feeling an absolute idiot. Evfra apparently agreed, judging by the way his eyes tightened as he glared at her.

Mashiar sighed, letting go of her hand, but his smile returned quickly. “What would you have us do about the ship?” he asked Evfra.

Evfra eyed Ryder for a moment. “I think I want the Pathfinder’s eyes on that wreckage,” he said slowly.

Ryder tried very hard not to drum her heels on the ground for sudden joy. She couldn’t suppress her smile, though, especially when Evfra sighed resignedly when he caught glimpse of it. Clearly he didn’t think much of her ability to keep her head on straight at the moment, but then again, she had been cooped up in that cell for an eternity. Her boundaries on what could be considered acceptable behavior changed drastically in that light.

“You’ll be joining us, then?” Mashiar said with delight. “I’ll win you yet, lady Pathfinder,” he said to her slyly. “I’ll be on the docks waiting for you.” He nodded to Evfra, then left. That froze her smile as she realized Evfra might completely misinterpret.

He exchanged a long look with her before he walked back to his desk wordlessly. Ryder’s mood flipped and she studied him with serious eyes, concerned by just how little she could read in his face. Maybe the effects of their bonding was finally wearing off, but she was afraid that she couldn’t read him as well because he was drawing away from her. Again she felt that urgency to get out. We are getting out, she consoled herself.

“My turn, Pathfinder,” a woman’s voice drew Ryder’s attention and she looked up to see the unpleasantly familiar face of Ashae, another one of Evfra’s lieutenants.

Suppressing a sigh, Ryder sat up straight and waited for Ashae to begin her questioning. After Saar, Ashae had to be her least favorite person in the Resistance; apart from deliberately not telling her name to Ryder – she only found it out when Evfra said her name the day before – she was sure that the woman ate rocks for breakfast. From the way her eyes were eternally fixed like chipped ice, Ryder wondered if there was any joy in her life at all; something about her today was a little different, though, and Ryder couldn’t quite place her finger on what it was.

“Evfra,” Ashae said, unexpectedly involving the Resistance leader. She hadn’t done that before. “Is it true? You are taking the Pathfinder to Voeld?”

“Yes,” Evfra said.

Ryder, I believe you may be in danger, SAM’s voice said and Ryder immediately stood up, trying to be as casual as she could about moving away from the woman.

“And you are going to let her walk around freely?” Ashae demanded. Evfra let out a slow sigh and went around his desk so that he could speak more softly.

“She won’t be walking around freely, she will be under my eyes.”

Wordlessly Ashae suddenly drew a weapon, aimed at Ryder and fired before Ryder could even comprehend what was happening, let alone move out of the way; an intense burn lashed her arm and she staggered sideways, instinctively clapping a hand to the wound, eyes shocked and heart racing as she looked up at Ashae.

Evfra’s hand was on Ashae’s wrist; he had pushed her aim off course, somehow anticipating the woman’s actions. “Just what was that?” he demanded furiously, eyes burning.

“I’m saving the Resistance,” Ashae said harshly, futilely tugging on her wrist, but Evfra wouldn’t let it go.

“You are not going to hurt her, especially not without my say so in my office,” he said coldly.

“But she’s poisoning your mind, Evfra! You cannot trust these Milky Way creatures!”

“Have you become a Roekaar while I wasn’t looking?” Evfra snarled, his tight grip suddenly loosing Ashae’s wrist and she snatched it back down.

“I believe in the Resistance!” she said, affronted.

“Act like it, then! Our war is with the kett, not the Initiative – for now. I won’t have you squander our only opportunity to learn everything we can about them because you’re afraid of their influence over me!”

For a wonder, Ashae actually looked down, ashamed. “You are right, Evfra. I acted out of haste.” The look she gave Ryder was maybe slightly less hostile; Ryder knew that was the only apology she was ever going to get.

Without another word, Ashae walked out and to Ryder’s incredulous disappointment Evfra just let her go. Blood dribbled between her fingers, still tightly gripping her arm and she wished that she could squeeze the pain of it out, though at that moment she was almost glad of it; it distracted her from the consuming desire to demand why she had to walk on eggshells around everyone here all the time, but that woman could just shoot her intending much more harm than she managed and all that Evfra did was to admonish her. Lightly. Well, perhaps that was unfair; Evfra definitely couldn’t afford to defend her too much, but he could at least have looked a little worried.

“The Roekaar would have an easy time recruiting that one,” she said finally.

Evfra looked in the direction his lieutenant had left. “Ashae would never join them. She may seem like the type, but her family was executed in front of her, one by one. You couldn’t find a more loyal member of the Resistance.”

“Well, her communication skills leave something to be desired,” Ryder remarked, a little tight-lipped. She wasn’t exactly jealous, but she wasn’t overly fond of the admiration in Evfra’s voice, especially considering what had just happened.

“I will take you to the infirmary,” Evfra said, glancing at her arm.

“I’ll be fine,” she said stiffly.

He frowned. “As you wish.”

Ryder sighed. “I do need to clean it and bandage it, but I will do it myself,” she said. For a moment Ryder wasn’t sure if he might not refuse to take her to the only obvious place she could do that, but he finally grimaced and nodded, heading for his quarters.

The moment they were inside, Ryder went straight to the antechamber, filling the basin there with water before tainting it with her blood as she washed. “A little to the right and not even SAM could bring me back,” she vented furiously, painfully extracting her arm from her shirt and accepting the salve Evfra handed to her. “What did I ever do to her anyway? Why does she think I’ve been poisoning your mind of all things?”

“She wasn’t aiming to kill,” Evfra said. “Ashae may be impulsive, but she does not dispose of resources that easily. She wanted to maim you, to keep you from going to Voeld. All she sees is that I trust you too much compared to when we first left Aya and that is a threat to the Resistance with the Initative looming over us as it is.”

“Well forgive me for not adoring her for not wanting me completely dead,” Ryder said coolly, but winced with a sharp breath as she began to dab her wound; it stung something fierce, but thankfully it was quite shallow and wouldn’t require special attention. So he trusted her? That was nice to hear.

“No, your adorations are quite clearly elsewhere,” Evfra said like a block of steaming ice. “The look on your face when Mashiar took your hand – you like him, don’t you?” he asked, not quite accusing her, but definitely disapproving of how she had handled the situation.

“You’re jealous?” Ryder asked, startled.

Evfra frowned. “Jealous over what?”

“It’s not my fault that he started up with me! And as I recall it was you who fell at me that first time, not the other way around; so yes, are you jealous?”

He glared; a crack in the ice. “Perhaps among your people bonding is handled differently, but for us there is nothing to talk about if your feelings do not match your words.”

Ryder clenched her jaw, trying and failing to keep from retorting hotly, “I could hardly tell him I’m yours, now could I?”

“You are not mine,” Evfra snarled, and his façade completely shattered. “You cannot be mine because everything I built would collapse the moment anyone even suspected I even looked at you that way – and this fact just amuses you!”

A jumble of emotions surged through her. “I wasn’t playing games with you, Evfra! Whether or not you want to admit it or defend it, I am yours anyway.”

The fury in him seemed to melt into an almost painful wariness; he was clearly struggling between his desire to continue and all the hurt he carried that prevented him from just accepting her. His words hurt, but she knew him well enough by now to know what was really behind them. Though, that did not aid her in convincing him that she did not want another; certainly Mashiar was charming and refreshingly open with his interest in her – but he was not Evfra.

“What do I have to do to convince you once and for all?” Ryder demanded, frustrated to tears.

“Perhaps there is nothing you can do,” Evfra said. “Perhaps I just need more than what I can ever have. But then, from the start this has threatened everything and yet no matter how I try I cannot resist wanting it anyway.”

“I’m here, aren’t I?” Ryder asked.

“If I only understood why,” he murmured and kissed her, pulling her close.

Energy surged through her body at his touch and she gasped as if a thirst she hadn’t realized she had was suddenly quenched in an instant. His arms made her feel complete in a way that took her by surprise and finally she felt sweet relief when she saw beyond the ice in his eyes again and into his heart. Somehow the fact that they were in the Resistance headquarters, so close to so many who should not know anything about them, made Evfra’s need of her so much more poignant as he couldn’t stop savoring her, each touch like burning fire on her skin, but most of all she was drowning in her own desire to staunch the void that sprang up in her every time she was afraid of losing him again.

Stumbling entwined to Evfra’s bed, Ryder lost herself in him.

#mass effect andromeda #evfra de tershaav #fanfic #angst #writers #evfra x ryder

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