#drama is infinite times easier to write

[vintagesimstress]

Me about every scene in Act 3 of my hopefully-one-day-going-to-be-published-story:

[elslittlestories]

The Bad Autistic Batch

I've had this in the back of my head for a while and finaly took the time to write it down. It's a mix of observtions and headcanons I guess? On how I feel like the 4 original members of the Bad Batch are all autistic af!

Tech

The obvious one. He said it himself, his brain doesn’t process thoughts and moments the way most people do.

He has a hard time identifying his feelings and therefore tends to push them away and rely on logic and rational thoughts, which always come easy and loud in his mind.

Very gifted, he’s too smart to care about social rules and never bothered to learn cues and small talk. He was created to solve problems, people shouldn’t expect anything else from him. He comes off as cold and obnoxious to most people, always speaks bluntly without thinking of the effect of his words on the person opposite him. Simply because it doesn’t occur naturally to him that some truth might need sugarcoating.

He’s a self-taught everything, with infinite curiosity and thirst for knowledge. He gets bored fast though and will skip from one subject to another as soon as he feels like he’s mastered it. He’ll get REALLY excited if you ask him questions about anything.

He doesn’t care about his looks, as long as it’s practical, he’s good with any outfits. Although, he’ll wear comfy clothes whenever he can. His hair is kept just long enough so that he can slick them back with gel and get them stuck with his goggles’ headband.

To self-sooth, he relies on his sound databank—he can listen to a record on a loop for hours—and mental games such as counting backward from 1 million with only prime numbers. Tapping on his datapad is probably also a sort of stimming.

Outside of his brothers, he has a hard time maintaining a relationship, may they be platonic or not. To start, he doesn’t really understand the concept of different types of relationships. He’s oblivious to most hints of interest and needs someone—Wrecker—to point it out. He’ll panic, be really awkward about it, overshare to hide his fluster…until he figures out what makes you tick and weaponizes it!

Crosshair

In case there were any doubt, he’s a neat freak. He NEEDS his stuff to be in the right place, as much as he needs routine and discipline to control his stress level. Even though his military training has taught him how to deal with the unexpected, he has a hard time dealing with change.

If given the choice, he’d only wear his blacks. The tightness of the fabric is comforting and he doesn’t have to think about assembling an outfit or whatever. He cuts his hair every week, the same exact way, from left to right, then the backside of his head.

He won’t eat new food unless his hunger is life threatening, not because of sensory issues but because his transit is a bigger drama queen than he is!

He’s the most emotionally immature of the squad and used to have the wildest mood swings. He became good at keeping a stern straight face once he realized people would use it as a way to arm him. He’s also the most stubborn: good luck trying to change his mind on anything.

On a general basis, he hates people. Especially the one that wants to touch him! The only person allowed to hug him is Wrecker, because there’s no stopping him anyway. He may go mute when overwhelmed, hence the number of fights he got himself into rather than have a talk. With time and around the right people, he might get better at dealing with his feelings, but for now it’s easier to just avoid people, since they’re the one causing said feelings.

Maintaining any sort of relationship is close to impossible outside of his brothers. It takes a very special person—like Echo—to get his affection and respect. Romantic feeling are out of his bucket list, he finds the concept of flirting ridiculous anyway. If you want to be with him, just say it! He’ll probably reject you, the man has some heavy attachment/abandonment issues to sort out first. Trust Omega to help with that, so maybe one day…

Wrecker

THE emotionally mature one of the squad! Feelings are always intense for him and he wears them on his face. He’ll cry for anything, but since he can break your spine with his bare hands, people usually don’t make fun of him out loud.

He has huge difficulties in learning practical stuff—he was the last to speak clearly and read—and won’t do anything good with verbal instructions if they go longer than 5 to 10 words. He’s good with his hands, though, and once Tech got him into the marvelous world of explosives, he became unstoppable. Even Tech will admit Wrecker is the expert in the matter.

Another thing he was quick to learn, thanks to his emotional awareness and Hunter’s help, was how to read people. If only to stop being played! It might also be the secret to their squad sticking together despite their differences and hot temper.

He’s very open about needing "autistic joy", such as eating his favorite snack, listening to a song on a loop and watching things blow up. It tends to make him look childish. His brothers are very protective over this and make sure nothing prevents Wrecker to enjoying his sweet nothings.

He loves to isolates for an hour or two, to watch his favorite holovids, but is otherwise very touchy feely. Hugs sooth him a lot when he’s stressed out. If he can’t get one, he’ll rely on singing his favorite tune or repeating a word in his head. He used to do it out loud when he was a kid but it drove his brothers mad so he internalized it.

He can handle a flirt, although he has a hard time catching a hint. It’s easier to notice someone’s interest on others than himself, probably because of his lack of self-esteem. He’d most likely be a very clingy partner.

Hunter

AKA the king of masking. He may look as close to normal as a defective clone can be, in control of himself, but take a step into his mind and you’ll be surprised.

First of all, he has HUGE sensory issues, no doubt worsened by his genetic enhancement. He has learned to tough it out and ignore the strong reaction some textures or smell or sounds causes him to experience. But they tend to turn into stress. He’s constantly devoured by anxiety and fear—of anything from touching that one thing that will overstimulate him so much he won’t be able to function, to making a bad call that cause one of his brother’s death—and there’s no amount of spinning his knife that can sooth it.

He relies on rules and discipline to get a sense of control, even though one might argue his sense of both those concepts is not exactly by the book. It tends to help with tuning down his emotions as well. Just like every sensory input is loud to him, his feeling can be deafening and mastering them was mandatory to become the squad leader.

It was with that in mind that he became an expert in social behaviors. Mostly unconsciously, he studied everyone around him to learn how to hold himself and how to read the room. Despite him being naturally introverted, you’ll often find him chatting with the various captains his squad was assigned to work with. Told you, he’s a king of masking.

On the rare occasions he failed to contain his emotions—bursts of anger on the battlefield aside—it came out loud and violent. Took Wrecker to squeeze him in his arms for Hunter to calm down.

One thing he couldn’t learn this way is flirting. He can’t do it for his life, despite being the receiver of numerous attempts from various species. Maybe it’s because of his sensory issues, but the idea of sex is of no appeal to him and he has never felt something strong enough to be called romantic love. That stuff is just not for him, he feels contempt with his brothers and Omega.

Oh, and the bandana is just an excuse for no easy hair routine. Give him one reason to get out of his armor and blacks, and he’ll slip into floppy clothes in a heartbeat.

Last but not least, all four of them have a STRONG sens of justice—although sometime missplaced—and prefers staying home rather than being anywhere else, wherever home may be.

[wardencommanderrodimiss]

Back in Jugdral with the Three Frat Houses AU for another important question (and actually a post I started to write before I went on a tangent about the Crusty Old Cult Leader Dudes):

What Is Loptous' Deal.

We know Manfroy's deal - he's trying to resurrect Loptous so that it can destroy the world, and he's trying to do this before A) the Grimleal resurrect Grima to destroy the world, B) the Duma Faithful convince Duma to conquer the world, or C) the Agarthans successfully infiltrate the Loptr Church, the Duma Faithful, and the Grimleal, and kill their gods.

However, we have several possibilities for Loptous:

1. Grima et al. Have A New Compatriot: Loptous presumably exists somewhere off with the other dragons and is paying absolutely no attention to the humans vying for his attention.

Pros: makes everything much much easier for Sigurd and Deirdre and they deserve it after what they go through in canon; one may consider the drama happening behind the scenes between Naga, Duma, Mila, Loptous, Grima, and the other dragon gods who are detached from the everyday.

Cons: no drama happening in the foreground in the everyday situations of the main cast

2. Sothis and Foresti Have A New Compatriot: Loptous is Julius' pet lizard and communicates with him in vaguely prophetic dreams which he ignores.

Pros: Foresti-Loptous slapfight except they're both lizards who are less than 5 inches long combined; Julius and Uncle Lewyn have this weird point of connection and bond over it; does anyone remember that viral twitter thread about the guy who ordered crickets and they got loose everywhere? that's Sigurd trying to facilitate his son's interests.

Cons: if Loptous is hanging around being a menace to Julius I want it to have begun at a very young age* and I don't think that even Deirdre would think that letting a two-year-old have a pet lizard is a good idea.

(*Canonically, Julia notes that Julius used to be a kind boy before he was influenced by Loptous and became a terror when he was older. The reverse will happen in this AU. Loptous influences Julius to be the absolute most menace of a toddler that anyone has ever known, who attends a different preschool than his twin sister because he got kicked out of his first preschool for biting other kids all the time. Then when Julius is around 8 years old, it's like a switch flips as he thinks "hm, I don't need to follow every impulse that I have, do I?" and Loptous ineffectually rages.)

3. Some Kids Have Cool Imaginary Friends But All I Got Was This Horrid Beastie: Loptous is simultaneously Julius' (not-so) imaginary friend and the monster under Julia's bed.

Pros: I think that the twins should be really weird kids and this fits the bill; duality of how Sigurd and Deirdre would handle combatting a monster under the bed (Deirdre does forest witch things to reassure Julia that monsters can't get to her; Sigurd gets a baseball bat).

Cons: there is a certain level of shenanigans that can't happen when you have an incorporeal dragon known only to two people.

4. Where'd This Fucked-Up Haunted Antique Doll Come From: Loptous' spirit lives inside a haunted doll plushie that Manfroy tossed into the yard in the hopes that one of the kids would pick it up.

Pros: similar vibes to Option 2 but Loptous has infinitely less dignity; Julius being in high school and still having this beat-up dragon plushie living at the bottom of his backpack is a really cute thought even if the plushie is evil.

Cons: similar to Option 3, as the plushie would not be able to navigate the world on its own.

[spider-stark]

which peter is your fav to write?? (if you were to pick only one) (:

Ah this is such a good question!! I truly love writing for all of them, and I honestly can’t wait to further explore writing for Tom’s Peter (cause in Infinitely You he’s kinda goin through it with the whole grieving process/multiverse drama/other things lol, so i would love to write for him in a less traumatic setting).

BUT

If I absolutely had to pick only one, then I think it would probably be Andrew’s Peter! There’s just something about him, ya know? He’s the perfect one to use for that witty sort of banter that I just absolutely adore! I also just feel like I have an easier time writing for his version, maybe because he’s the one I’ve wrote for the most throughout my life.:)

Thank you so much for the question and here’s one for you as well: Which Peter Parker is your favorite in general or to read about? I feel like there is usually a noticeable difference in writing between the three, so I always love to hear others opinions on their faves! :)

[threebetrayals]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. ( REPOST DO NOT REBLOG ! )

✿ NAME:    grey ✿ PRONOUNS:    they/them ✿ PREFERENCE OF COMMUNICATION:    discord’s always infinitely better than tumblr ims, but i actively use both ✿ NAME OF MUSE(S):    scaramouche/kunikuzushi/kabukimono/shouki no kami/wanderer wow god he’s got a lot of names for someone with literally no true name. i also have 4 other blogs of muses but i won’t list them all here lmao

✿ EXPERIENCE/HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?):    christ. uh. i’m not even sure, but it’s definitely over 10 years. we?? might even be approaching 15 at this point??? i’m fandom grandpa ok

✿ PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED:    forums, dreamwidth, little bit of discord, but i’ve always come back to the hellsite that is tumblr.

✿ BEST EXPERIENCE:    i don’t have only one, i’ve had a LOT of amazing experiences in rp over the years. discovering the tumblr rp scene with my qp partner, writing all assortment of character dynamics & relationships with said qp partner, creating two ocs entirely for the fictional world he created, meeting some really amazing people who’ve followed me across all number of blogs regardless of fandom & muse (s/o to rook, holly, & reiikon honestly, i do not Deserve), playing in some really great panfandom games back in my time on dreamwidth & getting some character friendships i never thought i needed out of them, and... most recently, losing my mind over kazu/scara with goose because that’s already like, my favourite thing to happen on this blog ok

✿ RP PET PEEVES/DEALBREAKERS:    mmm... my big dealbreakers are people who basically spam the dash with stupid levels of ooc (i’m fine with some spam!! but there is a point where i can’t handle it) or, worse, gifset after gifset after gifset. also obligatory drama mention, but i’ve been really fortunate to have avoided a lot of that sort of stuff for several years now.

✿ FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT:    i love writing all three, given the right muses & circumstances! but i’m forever a huge fuckin sucker for angst. i have a type when it comes to muses and it usually involves haunting trauma which i really love to dig into to explore them more as a character. muse/character exploration as a whole is the the biggest draw for me when it comes to rp, and i like to go DEEP.

✿ PLOTS OR MEMES:    i love a healthy mix of both!! plots are great for very specific things i want to have play out or explore, and that structure can be really nice. even just some plotted pre-established relationship before jumping into a thread goes a long way for me. memes on the other hand, i adore as well. prompts to respond to will forever be easier than writing a starter with little to nothing to go off of and honestly? i’ve discovered some interesting interactions/aspects of characters i didn’t expect through memes & memes turned into threads.

✿ LONG OR SHORT REPLIES:    not to call myself out or anything but i’m gonna go ahead and say both again. long replies will always be my top favourite because lord knows i can get really long-winded while writing. i love exploring a character’s thoughts & feelings in response to things and long replies will always be the best way to delve into those in as much depth as i like. short stuff can be good too though, given sometimes you wanna write but don’t have the energy for paragraph after paragraph lmao. plus?? there’s a lot of fun & silliness that can be had in shorter threads that i’ll never turn down.

✿ BEST TIME TO WRITE:    whenever i have the attention span. honestly though, that seems to be evenings for me, maybe with a little afternoon mixed in.

✿ ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S):    uhhh... i won’t deny that i tend to pick up muses who i can relate to in some capacity. scara... i wouldn’t say i relate to him a TON, but we do share a sort of... lostness. i used to know what i wanted too, but things fell apart, as they do, and i still feel kinda just. lost in limbo. can also relate to wanting to stomp all over your emotions, so. yeAH LMAO if i’m like him at all, it’s in small ways.

tagged by:  the best goose @rosemourne tagging:  UHM. i never know who to tag. let’s see... @florafound, @chronal-anomaly, @luckuki, @alatusatlas, @lupusmatra, & anyone who’d like to be tagged?

[vcnusians]

NAME? . . . stephanie

PRONOUNS? . . . she / her only !

MOST ACTIVE MUSES? . . . lisa, cyndi, lydia (@bansheas), patti

RP PET PEEVES? . . . the bullying, sending hate, PLAGIARISM / stealing ocs (it's happened to me), taking someone's OC and using it for "x reader / yn" fics, the ostracism / deliberate exclusion if you're not in a "popular" clique, liking someone's starter call but never getting anything ever because i'm not deemed "cool" or popular enough

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS? . . . 12!

FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT? . . . anything as long as it's dramatic, something to keep building on, there's chemistry and it makes me feel something.

PLOTS OR MEMES? . . . both are great! memes are fun and have potential to evolve into threads and grow, but plotting is more specific and to the point and we can keep expanding on ideas and those small details and that can be really exciting. i do like direct communication, it's easier for me to process and helps me focus.

TIME TO WRITE? . . . in the early mornings, late evenings or on the days i don't see my boyfriend.

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES? . . . it really depends on the material, what i have inspiration for and how my muses respond to them, but i can promise i will never give you the bare minimum! sometimes i'm "into" more things than others, or another muse is louder, but whatever comes out will be written with pure love.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)? . . . cyndi, lisa, lydia and jane in different ways. cyndi with her sensitivity, intuition, obsession with beauty / fashion, her dreaminess and energy, her creative way of looking at things and how "venusian" she really is - she has aphrodite / venus vibes in the way she does everything with love. she has this deeply sensitive piscean energy that i vibe with. also she's got a thing for the "bad boys" and hahaha yep :))) lydia with her infinite levels of sass, bougie princess attitude, to-the-point straightforwardness, drama, "extra"-ness, high standards, can be a little bit of a brat when she doesn't get her way, knows what she wants and won't stop until she gets it but also highly sensitive and cares deeply for the people closest to her, and scary intelligent in a way that intimidates most of her peers. jane in the sense of being "different", the experience of having been bullied, having psychic abilities, being smarter and stronger than most "adults" give her credit for. she can seem superficial but she really isn't at heart. she has a way of "seeing through" people and knowing their secrets. yeah.... same. that's why i was drawn to these characters, i can relate. malia because she's a little socially "behind" after such a very different life experience and missing out on key adolescent milestones but also doesn't care about social norms, very blunt and has her own way of making sense of the world and other people, does and says what makes sense to her, a little rebellious, a little moody and mysterious but also funny, still healing from trauma that colored her life in every way but finding herself and knowing she can still have a good life. devi because she's always getting into one mess after another but still manages to have a good sense of humor about it. i would say loryn from valley girl, too, being a hopeless romantic but no one really knows who she is so i removed her from my muse list. cassie for having a big heart that's easily hurt, very emotional and sensitive, being a "lover girl". patricia for craving something different, adventure, wanting to live on the edge and have a taste of forbidden fruit, mystic psychic vibes.

tagged by : no one but i saw this on @miercolaes and wanted to do it

tagging : you !!! but also tag me so i can read it because i'm curious <3

[selphplusplus]

When you have to stay quiet. Zero dark, 30.

Ok but how you gonna say anything? Lmao.

Without admitting to being a damn spying motherfucker?

lol Leviticus

Shotguns and the indigenous Greenery

Now we get biblical.

Not in the Jesus kind of way

But in the old testament to Ash, leave them where they lay

Sodom and Gomorrah siren song

Where a lot looked back and saw the salt

His wife fall as the tears from his face. The salt was the same.

We’re talking 10 Commandments

Or 10 Command lines.

Airgas, in a flood, a torrent

A dark, dark, dark dark net torrent

Of information, flooding a particular access point

Filling the entire spectrum

With the seven seals

The seven trumpets

And the four horsemen

All set up

Bitch you know what I’m talking about

Stomp those feet baby stomp.

I can hear it from here

It’s funny that way

It’s very funny that way, because I understand what stemming is, as I am the same in that regard the differences

Let me channel a little Eminem

We can start with the Penis (mine is bigger by exponential amounts)

Then we can scream I don’t give a fuck and see, who really means it

When my balls hit the floor concrete cracks

When your balls come out, everybody laughs.

“See what he’s writing. “

🤏🏻👆🏻

Echoes of your own paranoia

Because you’re watching in real time.

Let’s let the rest of the world in on the Truman show huh?

You too loud.

Damn. Passive aggressive bullshit really.

Underground like a land mind.

Boom 💥

And you thought it was cool to ruin a friendship over all this. Without coming to me first. Just took actions into your own hands. Shit. Acting a lot like that person you in therapy over.

Oh. Oh? I don’t play fair.

You wanna pass judgment what you’re doing is infinitely morally worse than an addiction. You are driven by pure ego. Control freak behavior. Familiar. Hmm.

We can both break if we gonna walk down this bridge. Mutually assured destruction.

You don’t ever even see me. Ffs

And you know only the shit you’ve been spying on. Scum. Disgusting. All talk like you what to have a discussion but instead not a word. Just sideways roundabout shit. Judgmental glances. Never a “are you okay”.

So how you justify this? Peering into someone’s deepest and most intimate thoughts without their consent. No better than a rapist. The invasion is the same. And we both know mental wounds are much harder to heal.

Trust huh? Never had it with you it seems.

火にいきるのが死ねよ

That also explains the nonchalant attitude of my brother. Shit gets clearer and clearer. Say what you gotta say.

Ruin. Chaos for chaos sake. Bored and unfulfilled. So let’s start drama huh? Adopt 1000 mental disorders. Find a new identity. Make the ones around you enemies. When they care about you.

A master in self sabotage can easily recognize another. Queue up the blue October lyrics. Suicidal hate. Retarded disfigured clown, too much make up, it’s a lie how you act. But always always on stage. Histrionic. Borderline. Narcissist. Pick your flavor of the week.

Add in a little gasoline the self destructive kind, it’s become a part of your personality, only unlike Plath who phoenix flame rose to devour the ones around without recourse, indiscriminately burning

The world to a wasteland.

You are the self-immolating monk selling snake oil. You crave the camera but can’t light the match. Crave the attention but shy away from the flash. Talking a lot about smoke, but ecig when it counts.

PS,

How you like hearing your moms cheeks get clapped? Do I need to drop the pictures too. I think it’s easier to tell the truth.

Foiling your Deux

Fall out Boy Edition

Love from the other side, fuck it why not

Let’s go there, more like love from the afterlife

Apocalypse got the better of the whole damn nuclear family.

But the atom hurts the worst when the fission breaks away the til heat death do these bonds we break.

Bloodsport what too light a phrase

The hysteric craze

The blame laid

On a mantle too small and cluttered to hold another candle.

But you expect it to handle your wild fires , just as unpredictable,

I apologize in advance for the collateral damaged goods.

Baggage claim

This is the captain from the Malaysian plane.

And sugar it’s going down.

Loaded pistol grip pump when I cock my pen and pull it.

Not leaving this bed, hospice said

Sick in the head, in other words

I’m as ill as it gets.

Dance dance to the sound of beat down

Bitch this that friction in my genes that the original was talking about.

Only there’s no wish to be it.

Infact I prefer to just cackle and laugh

As the plane crash smashed what’s still intact of your sanity.

More vanity today.

Looking in mirrors and hate what you see

The bitch in reflections,

Welcome to the symphony

You called to strike up the band

But when the bass dropped and you had to with your thoughts

The thot in the mirror even saw what a raw deal they got.

So now you’re invisible, she ran away

At the thought of being you one more day.

Sorry prematurely I gotta cut it short and have to end it.

I mentioned earlier, there’s something else that needs writ and imma pin it.

They say the tribulation begins with a wailing and a gnashing of teeth. Bruxism keeps pace, there will be no teeth to gnash. Just dust and gums.

I will show you something different than your shadow at dawn weighing heavy behind you. Or your twilight wick at wax’s end. I will show you your traditions are naught but fear in a handful of dust.

The vessel, no the chalice bears no water.

Still we’ve yet passed the Thames

Or Styx or Lethe.

Yet all the same

April still to come, remains the cruelest month. So rudely forced.

“But what will people say?”

Zeus to Persephone.

So rudely forced.

The stork brings only deserts.

The San Pedro songs in fever dreams

We’re just so. Dreams.

Shattered like the mirror, like you. Like me.

I think it’s the similarities you resent.

Surrogate for the self.

Sterilize.

Better than euthanize.

Better than non-alive.

Because when you live the suffering is extended.

Saint de Sade. Patron Saint of Masochists and self flagellation.

Leviticus

Shotguns and the indigenous Greenery

Now we get biblical.

Not in the Jesus kind of way

But in the old testament to Ash, leave them where they lay

Sodom and Gomorrah siren song

Where a lot looked back and saw the salt

His wife fall as the tears from his face. The salt was the same.

We’re talking 10 Commandments

Or 10 Command lines.

Airgas, in a flood, a torrent

A dark, dark, dark dark net torrent

Of information, flooding a particular access point

Filling the entire spectrum

With the seven seals

The seven trumpets

And the four horsemen

All set up

Bitch you know what I’m talking about

Stomp those feet baby stomp.

I can hear it from here

It’s funny that way

It’s very funny that way, because I understand what stemming is, as I am the same in that regard the differences

Let me channel a little Eminem

We can start with the Penis (mine is bigger by exponential amounts)

Then we can scream I don’t give a fuck and see, who really means it

When my balls hit the floor concrete cracks

When your balls come out, everybody laughs.

[queer-and-dear-books]

Title: The Infinite Noise

Author: Lauren Shippen

Genre: YA Fiction | Romance | Friendship | Drama | (Low) Fantasy

Content Warnings: Depression | Mention of Self-Harm | Suicidal Thoughts 

Overall Rating: 8.7/10

Personal Opinion: It’s the classic love story of a jock and nerd except the jock also happens to be an Empath and the nerd happens to be depressed. When you can feel everything that the person you love feels, does that make having a relationship harder or easier? You’d have to read to find out. But I can guarantee that you’ll love reading about the way Caleb and Adam pine for each other along the way.

Couple Classification: Caleb X Adam = Jock X Nerd/Goth

Do I Own This Book? No.

Spoilers Below For My Likes & Dislikes:

Likes:

- I adore the alternating POV and I admit, that is probably because it’s my default writing style, so there’s a bias. I just love seeing both Caleb’s and Adam’s unique perspectives and thoughts to their growing development. To start with, the fact that Caleb is so dense to his own feelings (although they give reasoning for it, he often confuses others feelings for his own due to his ability) was funny and it made me so eager to see him realize that he’s having gay feelings for a boy. Meanwhile, Adam is aware of his own feelings and is constantly having a gay panic every time hot jock Caleb gets too close and again, it is hilarious. The funniest part was when Caitlin was talking about asking out Caleb and Caleb just could not, for the fucking life of him, parse the jealousy oozing out of Adam. 

- The development from near strangers to friends is honestly my favorite thing. Because the two of them actually act like super close friends and their flirting is so cute too. From the moment Adam made that cute playlist for Caleb and Caleb was just on cloud nine while Adam was panicking like “Oh shit, does he think I’m hitting on him? I’m trying to be a good friend! Is this how friends act?” It was new territory for both of them to navigate because they were both loners for their own reasons. Caleb just happened to have his own social circle because of his status as a jock but he was just as clueless as Adam was in navigating their friendship and later, romance.

- Adam helping Caleb choose an outfit for Homecoming was so adorable! And the moment when Caleb fell over Adam and they just stared into each other’s eyes had me squealing and wishing they would kiss! The fact that Caleb had still yet to figure out his own feelings at this point was just wild too. But when he finally did realize he wanted to kiss Adam, at their table no less, I was already so head over heels in love with their relationship.

- You know what really appeals to me about this book though? It completely destroys all the tropes I disliked in other books I’ve read. Their “breakup” isn’t caused by some internalized homophobia (like Be Dazzled). And Caleb doesn’t hook up with Caitlin, instead turning her down immediately while still maintaining friendship with her (instead of fucking making out or having sex with her like in We Contain Multitudes or The Dangerous Art of Blending In). And their fight was caused by real anxieties with actual life or death stakes (unlike in Late To The Party). And even though Adam didn’t want to be some damsel in distress for Caleb, he still acknowledged and also appreciated Caleb’s help when he was being picked on and was aware that things could’ve been worse had Caleb not intervened (unlike in Running With Lions). And the couple is out here communicating when they run into walls! Granted, they stopped doing that for months but Adam is severely anxious and Caleb… well he should’ve texted. Like he said.

- I also love Caitlin. She took rejection from Caleb well and tried to maintain a friendship with him. But best of all, her relationship with Adam is so good. She saw that he was lonely and being the nice person that she is, tried to get him to come out of his shell but not in an abrasive way. She’s just such a chill and cool person and I wish more characters were like her. Also I’m hoping that, from her surname (Park), that she’s Asian. For me personally.

- Fuck Bryce the homophobe and fuck Henry the sleazeball. Both are disgusting in their own right and also fuck Tyler for shitting on people for the qualities they lack. All three are disgusting people and I am so glad that someone (Caleb) stood up to them. And he called them out on their very own insecurities too while advocating for therapy like he’s doing. By the way, love whenever a book will advocate for therapy and all his sessions with Dr. Bright were so pleasant but also many of them were hilarious. Where he would just straight up text Adam while in her session. The way he had no idea Adam was embarrassed of his romantic feelings being so out there this entire time until Dr. Bright (AKA, his common sense filter) told him had me rolling. 

Dislikes: - Something I have to take into account when rating this book is the fact that it’s a multimedia story. There is a podcast called The Bright Sessions made by the author that tells other aspects of the story and centers more on, I assume, the Atypicals and the organization that Adam’s parents work for, the AM. Taking this into account, I am aware that there’s information I am missing that a fan of the podcast would not be while reading this book. That being said, this story stands on its own because it’s not about the Atypical experience but rather the love story between Caleb and Adam. It just so happens that Caleb is an Empath and Adam is depressed. 

- I’m guessing other patients of Dr. Bright like Damian and Chloe are more prevalent in the podcast but I do wish we got to know the latter a little more at least. She’s so sweet and kind. 

- The blank period where they both stopped communicating and thought the worst was honestly so disappointing. They were so good at talking about their issues! When Caleb first showed up to Adam’s house and Caleb kept on blurting things out until Adam got pissed, Adam actually said, “We are acting like assholes again” and they both put it aside to be good friends. To talk! Even if they couldn’t be 100% honest due to personal reasons, they wanted to be as transparent as possible. And they still wanted that but the two of them were being idiots! I just wish Caleb would’ve texted like he said he would. At least they apologized and agreed to date for real again afterward. But I will admit, I’m probably more inclined to let this transgression pass because, in comparison to some of the other couples I read about, this annoyed me the least.

- They never went on a real date and we never quite saw people’s reaction to them dating and that kind of bothered me a lot. Like where is the pay off for all of that slow burn pining? Just for them to fall out like that? Not sure if worth it...

[goblinselfshippr]

Oh shit I dont think I've talked about the library in depth here yet. I’m gonna go ahead and post as is because I don’t think I’ll ever be done, but it’s already long as hell. Get ready for a shit ton of parentheses because I have a weird need to constantly use them

Also called the Library of Alexandria II, it is its own little pocket dimension of knowledge. It isn't technically infinite, but it definitely feels like it. Being Demon King of Time and Space, Sam exists in all dimensions, but not at once. Time is everywhere, meaning there isn't a world that doesn't have a version of him (confusing double negative I know). This means that all versions of him have access to the library.

Since the library is communal between his other selves, it is very common that I am asked where a certain dimension's version of a book is. I don't mind, but they really could just summon it themselves... For some reason I'm the only version of me in the library (it is entirely possible that there's a filter so that I can't see other me's), but most of the other Sam's recognize me. The few that don't just know me as the librarian, which is quite sad that they don't have a version of me. My version of Samael says he would get very lonely because none of his brothers appreciated Assiah the way he did I dont think he realizes I hated it here too until he took me in.

Anyway back to the library, it contains all knowledge that all versions of Samael have personally collected. Yes he has a section of works that he hand copied from the actual Library of Alexandria, but I am not big brained enough to understand all that math. His handwriting from that time is AWFUL too, so even if I could it would take weeks to decipher. This section is the only one that hasn't been updated. The others have since been retyped for easier reading, but these he keeps as they are.

He has a place for his outdated science and math textbooks that were more than likely stolen from a college centuries ago, that he sometimes reads for laughs over a glass of wine. He has so many cutesy math books it is hilarious, these are very obviously children’s books for maybe elementary age kids at the oldest, and they’re all well loved. Big kindergarten math teacher vibes. While demon lore and summoning is in the occult section, there are plenty of books on demon and general nonhuman biology in the science area! 10/10 very interesting. Really cute fact: my favorite bedtime story as a kid was Cosmos by Carl Sagan, (when I say kid I mean I was bringing this nearly disintegrated copy to preschool for show and tell) and the dark blue, gold embossed, absolutely dilapidated copy I grew up with is encased in glass in the science section. Yes I still know every word and when I found out he died before I was even born I cried for a fucking week. I need to buy my fourth copy soon-

The endless history and occult sections are my personal favorites. I actually got to contribute to some of the books in the occult section!! It really comes in handy when helping Dante out on his missions (yeah I’m self inserting by saying I personally made the demon information panels in the first-fourth games bc Nico made the ones in the fourth dhisbcish). There are so. Many. Cursed. Items. In the occult section. I ended up having to make a little corner for them so I wouldn’t accidentally get cursed from putting them back. They’re all given a sticker label like “bat amulet, wearer gets chased by bats until it gets taken off” and put behind glass. You have to come get me to personally unlock whatever item you need and write your reasoning for checking it out.

What about the history right? Surely someone as old as time itself has some really cool information about how people acted prehistory. The answer depends on whether you’re someone that scrolls past the notes or someone who reads as many comments as you possibly can. Sam is a drama queen and self described anthropologist, which means that there are entire file folders of amusing human interactions he witnessed. Things like “Today Neidhart decided he was going to begin courting Grede, and the idiot threw an onion at her. I am still laughing. Worse still, Grede’s sister overheard him wailing to his friend about what happened. All was well in the end though because once she heard the kind words relayed by her sister, Grede decided to give him another chance. How sweet.” It isn’t the flowery biased works about historical figures in power, it’s almost entirely research journals about collective social ideas based on time and region or little snippets that show humans have always been humans. These he keeps the original and hand typed versions together. He does have several signed scores from famous composers and a few original scripts from Shakespeare that he says were gifted to him (idk I wouldn't put it past him to have stolen them or asked for them in exchange for a contract).

Which brings us to the fiction. One of his favorite things about Assiah and the humans that reside there is the creativity, so of course as many nonfiction books as he has, he probably has twice the amount in fiction. Especially since common themes in fiction can show ideals of people at the time. The sheer amount of terrible romance novels in this section is very telling. Some of them have highlighted sections or notes that just say “lol what?” Or “that’s not how any of this works” etc. The only thing he has more of than romance is science fiction. Yes everything is alphabetical, but this section is also sorted by most to least possible. He will get bored one night and just reread the entire section, or at least as much as he can before the sun comes up. He absolutely hates Dr Seuss though and if you bring one in the library he will kick you out. I have no idea why, but this man could not would not in HIS house lmao.

[iturbide]

How about the Most Dramatic Boi and owner of Misseltanin, Owain?

MY BOY

How do I feel about this character?

OWAIN IS PERFECT.  THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING THAT COULD IMPROVE HIM AS A CHARACTER.  Absolutely everything about him is pure gold from his over-the-top theatrics to the way he names all his special moves to his whole ‘hungering sword hand’ thing -- every time he’s on the screen I am dying laughing from sheer delight at his antics and the drama that he cooks up. Owain sparks a joy in me that is unrivaled by anyone in Awakening -- not even The Vaike can hold a candle to him, and I just got done talking about how much I love The Vaike.  Owain is perfect and precious and priceless and I will never stop loving him in all his dramatic glory.

Who do I ship this character with romantically?

I.  I have no idea actually.  I have a hard time shipping the 2nd gen Awakening cast, even among one another: I love so many of the relationships as platonic friendships, but none of them have ever really struck me as romantic.  Is it cheating to say I ship him with happiness?  Because for all the joy he makes me feel, he deserves to be happy and appreciated.

Who is my brOTP for this character?

MORGAN AND CYNTHIA.  JUSTICE CABAL FOREVER.  I’ve always loved the idea of these three kids making up elaborate stories and acting out grand adventures together, using it as a way to train and improve their skills once they start learning how to really use weapons but also just having fun with it.  Plus, there’s something really touching about the idea that they stick together and help each other out, devoted to protecting and saving the world even though the first time they made that oath the danger was all pretend.  Also Lucina!  Their supports are really sweet and heartfelt, and I’m really attached to the idea that Owain respects and admires Lucina and does what he can to ease her burdens as their leader because he knows the pressure she’s under and wants to help.  Also, it’s really sweet to imagine that he’s one of the only people that can make her relax and even laugh a little with his antics, and that he plays it up a little more around her just to get her to smile.

What’s my Unpopular Opinion™ about this character?

I didn’t know there were popular opinions about Owain, let alone unpopular ones.  Unless the opinion that he’s absolutely perfect and a blessing wherever he happens to appear counts as an unpopular opinion.  Fire Emblem Warriors is infinitely better for the simple fact that Owain makes an appearance in it -- and they got his character absolutely perfect, he’s absolutely hilarious and delightful and just thinking about the scene where he reveals that he’s Lissa’s son (and how she frantically insists that she believes him while he’s trying to figure out how to prove it) is cracking me up.  As far as I’m concerned, he’s sheer perfection given physical form and elevates everything that he happens to get involved in.

What’s one thing I wish would have happened with this character in canon?

I honestly wish that he got more praise.  While it’s easy to write off his over-the-top drama as pointless monologuing, the fact is that Owain is actually incredibly talented: he’s good with weapons, as evidenced by his supports with Lucina, and his creativity alone is already a major boon given how flexible it makes him: even Robin is stunned to realize that the epic tale Owain’s been regaling them with involves a lot of careful consideration, and the bosses he describes are defeated by taking advantage of noted weaknesses and vulnerabilities.  His theatrics manage to obscure what a capable young man he is, and I really wish that his skills were acknowledged and praised more in canon -- up to and including the theater itself, because that kind of showmanship is able to give people a much-needed break from reality, and a bit of levity really can make it easier to bear a dire burden sometimes.  Owain really is a vital member of the group, and I wish it were acknowledged more.

Give Me a Character    

[inked-out-trees]

⭐ for The Keep Going Song? Thanks! :)

(anh i would die for you)

Thank you for asking! I am going to be talking about the whole thing because it's fun, and because there's not really many ~secrets~ within the text to ramble about, just little fun snippets!

I'll do it under a cut because I will definitely ramble. Woohoo!

I came across The Keep Going Song (the song) after my Lookout 3 Companion Playlist (& my spotify discovery) introduced me to the Bengsons. The effect was almost instantaneous - it's the kind of warmth I try to encompass in everything I do, and for the next few days I had it on repeat as I worked. This was around the time I was finishing my Lookout script, and I had been toying with the idea of writing a Cornleyverse fic after absolutely devouring all 10 fics in the tag. What I knew was that I wanted it to be sweet, I wanted it to pull them all together, and I wanted it to be a progression. Despite only having seen the Goes Wrong Show, jumping into the fandom made me want to dimensionalize these characters and give them a story beyond everything that had already occured.

I also watched Christmas Carol before / during the writing process, but to date I have not watched Peter Pan or the full-length TPTGW. My prior knowledge comes from Wikipedia, the delightul amateur TPTGW production on YouTube, a friend's excellent transcription of the Haversham Manor script, and tumblr meta analysis. I think I did a reasonable enough job pretending I knew what I was doing.

Let's get going!

I knew off the top that it was going to be vignettes - they would give me room to spread the story over the long period of time it takes for a group of people to grow into something resembling a family. Like I said in the original author's note, there was supposed to be more of the early, snippy days - but I got so focused on making them kinder that I found I couldn't properly write a fight. In hindsight, it probably would have been easier if I tried writing that first, but, well. Once I realized that it was too late. The alphabet idea came later, once I had them all finished: I wanted to organize them somehow, but numbers felt too open, too infinite - closing the story on an organizational endpoint was just really satisfying.

a - Every good story needs a good beginning.

c - Starting with the end of Peter Pan is my sneaky way of slipping past the fact that I haven't seen the earlier shows! The Max and Sandra storyline is just so sweet, and I wanted to let it exist a little bit in between our jump from Peter Pan to Christmas Carol. This vignette came so easily when I wrote it and I love love love the feelings and the tentativity about the whole thing.

f - This was actually the last vignette I wrote. I realized I needed some front-end padding because otherwise my angst plot came rather abruptly, and what better way? At this point, too, I was trying to bring in POVs from each one of our characters, and when deciding on Trevor's POV I thought the exasperation-excitement combination would be an excellent choice. It turns out Trevor is my favourite to write, mostly because I can find his voice a lot easier than some of the others - and probably also because I hold a lot of fondness and nostalgia for stage crew work. Also, I wrote most of this one on a long evening walk in the notes app on my phone. Fun fact.

h - I did my original idea slam in a draft tumblr post, and this one just says "birthday party but one without all the drama of christmas carol". And what do you know, that's exactly what it is! I definitely took the birthday party (in CCGW as well as in this fic) as a kind of proof that they really do like each other, if they're doing things like this and if they want to do things like this - and that theme of okay, they want to be here formed the basis for this part. I think it's exceptionally sweet that Dennis came looking for friends and ended up finding, well, something. And I popped in a little MMNI reference with "one of the Janines" - Backwards Janine? Frontwards Janine? Original Janine? Who knows! It's one of them!

l - The thing about this plot is that it's actually one of the first ideas I had when dreaming up this fic, and I couldn't quite let it go. The point was, what if I somehow split them up? How can they get on when half the society is out of commission? And the most reasonable way I could find to actually get half of them out of commission was the car accident. To be honest, this one is mostly filler - it's also the second vignette I wrote, and it found its birth in the email drafts of my work laptop.

m - Trying to map out this little plotline without overdoing it might have been the most difficult part of this fic, and I'm still not 100% sure I succeeded. This is our explanation for the unease from the vignette above, and it took me 3 rewrites before I finally found something that settled in my brain. "Dennis gets chased by a goose" might be one of my favourite lines in the fic though.

Also, putting these letters right next to each other made me feel really clever for no reason.

n - My Jonathan perspective also took a few stutter-steps in its beginning, but this one ultimately came from the promo video's reveal that Robert and Dennis live together, and me playing with the continual idea of the remaining cast members being rather unmoored in their injured castmates' absence. Robert in particular because I love his character and I love making him Feel Things(TM) (fun hint: this will also be a small theme in the new cpds fic I have in the works!) and I want to see so much from this odd relationship between him and Dennis. Obviously they have to tolerate each other if they are willingly roommates - how far can I go with that? I love how this one turned out.

o - All I have to say about this one is that I still really love the sweetness between these two, and they deserve the world. Also, at some point during writing this I was really caught up with how striking Dave's face silhouette is (don't ask) so that ended up making it in somehow.

q - Girls' Night is SO important to me. After all the work they've done to make these gals friends I needed to capture it, and a pleasant night in just made a lot of sense. This one is the home of a few of my headcanons - Annie has a chef roommate and Max does a lot of the cooking, thus the "neither of us are the usual household cooks" comments, and I also think they're at the point where they can joke about their previous failures (especially with these three together) so the nod to A Trial To Watch (my favourite gws episode) was so fun. Also, Waking Ned really is a silly pick-me-up of a movie - would recommend. Special thanks to CBC for giving us Canadians quality British TV alongside our occasionally questionable homegrown programming.

r - It wouldn't be a fic about progress and growth with this crew without a disheartening moment turned into gold. I wrote this one while barbecuing, another fun fact, and no joke the hardest part was figuring out what to name the play they were doing. I kept pace with the whole "Jonathan can't get onscreen" gag, which was personally hilarious and made me cackle as I wrote it, and the rest of it just felt good. I will always have a soft spot for comfort and reassurance in a story and getting to write it has just been an absolute delight.

t - This was one of my other unplanned vignettes. It was originally to fill out Robert's POV, but also to express a bit of how things have changed in Chris's attitude towards his cast - if there's one thing I would change from Mischief's characerisation thus far, it's this brand of almost-kindness that I consistently need to write him with. It takes the aftermath of the car accident and uses it to kind of make him understand - this is a valuable group of people and I don't want to lose it. But of course he's not the type of person to actually express that in any way, so I thought the frenetic hovering was a good way to get the point across. As well, the kind-of-bonding between Chris and Robert - the two of them are such powerhouses of insistent personality that conflict so easily but they've also got a more secret kind of friendship that deserves to be explored a little more. I really like this vignette and how it ended up portraying how they are around each other, how they really do know each other, especially when they're not fighting. Makes me soft.

w - This is the first vignette I wrote! I honestly didn't realize until writing this just how much I identify with Annie - best of both worlds re. crew and cast, a bit of tenacity regarding getting through things, overall personality - I just love her so so much. She also seems like the most sensible of the cast, so the collective "why are we really here?" moment with Trevor really spoke to me. I love their friendship, I love the kind of quiet vibe this vignette gives off - this is one of the ones I can feel most strongly, the one I can step into and exist inside. I also spent most of my old drama rehearsals and classes without shoes, so that had to make it in just by virtue of the sock brigade (me).

z - One thing I knew for sure since the inception of the fic was that it needed to end on a victory. I took the images I had of this victorious adrenaline, everyone together having a good time, kind of getting smashed, and karaoke (I really wanted the karaoke, for some reason) and went the obvious route: the wedding. Ending on Chris POV also felt so right - possibly because he's the one with the most growth in this fic - and getting to finally feel this triumph with him after all these other trials and tribulations was an absolute joy. The wedding hall, in my head, looks like the one my cousin used (it was at a zoo... my sister and I went on a night walk and heard a lot of screaming peacocks) and I definitely threw all my wistfulness, all my love for the characters I'd developed, and all my love for this fantastic fandom into this part. The incorrect lyrics that Annie sings are exactly what I think every time I hear that song, because I've never looked up the lyrics before and my brain likes to play Mad Libs with my super-questionable auditory processing. And the image of the ballroom staff getting really exasperated with them and shutting all the lights off came to me at night and is hastily scribbled on a sticky note (it's a wonder it's legible) but I still strongly believe that it's the perfect, perfect way to end. I still get the warm feelings when I reread this part, even now, after so many reads.

And, finally - our end quote is exactly what started this whole thing. What is this drama society if not a rough beginning? But the concept that we'll make it through, that we can just take a step and then another and it'll be okay because we're together... it's hard to describe just how much it means to me, to my place in the world, to the world itself. I think one of my rather consistent aims in writing, no matter what it is, is to be able to have this collective - characters that become family, people that are important to each other, this constellation to lean on - because it's all I can say for the human experience. It's probably quite a bit of wishful thinking (as I said to another friend, "I am apparently letting loose on all my repressed social feelings of the past year and shoving them into fics") and a sort of subconscious confirmation that if I write it, I can be it. So this force of understanding and kindness and ultimately good people helping each other through the world is something I can't help but include, something that means the absolute world to me.

I'm so glad to have been able to share this fic with everyone, and extra glad that it's been able to touch some people along the way. I've found such an incredible community in Mischief and coincidentally I think The Keep Going Song represents that warmth, too - the community I've been so lucky to exist inside, how we're helping each other along, step by step. What a beautiful thing to be a part of! Thank you for reading and allowing me to give you a bit of my heart. 💖💖

[loveisneurotic]

Kaguya-sama Blind Reaction/Analysis: S1E1

Hello everyone, this is my blog which I am currently using to react to and analyze Kaguya-sama: Love Is War much more seriously than I should analyze any romcom.

I have only seen the first episode of the anime, which this post shall explore using far too many words. If I'm feeling particularly motivated, I may read the manga as well.

My analysis will contain spoilers. If you're thinking of watching this show and haven't seen it yet, I recommend you at least go check out the first episode yourself before reading any further. I don't know what the rest of the show is like, but what I've seen so far has been both entertaining and thought-provoking.

I'm going in mostly blind, but not entirely blind. There are a few images of the anime and manga that I have been exposed to, although without the attached context. Due to cultural osmosis and the sheer popularity of this work, perhaps that was almost inevitable.

Figure 1.1.1: Why did this guy write an essay about a single episode of an ongoing romcom?

Kaguya-sama: Love Is War

Season 1 Episode 1

I Will Make You Invite Me to a Movie / Kaguya Wants to Be Stopped / Kaguya Wants It

Power dynamics in relationships

Figure 1.1.2: Immediately, the mangaka's tastes become clear.

I heard a saying once that really stuck with me: "The partner who cares the least has all of the power."

In the world of dating, I often sincerely believed this saying. You may yearn for someone's affection, but the other person need not give it to you until they are willing and ready. No matter how much you want it, you can't make someone more interested in you, unless you resort to being roundabout, such as adding some mystery and intrigue to your courtship. But is that excessive?

I once felt a potential lover slipping through my grasp, and before I knew it, I found myself chasing after them. As I was yearning for their attention, I felt as if I'd lost my dignity. It was humiliating. Painful. Was it just that they weren't the right person for me? Or was I not funny enough? Not charismatic enough? Not interesting enough? Too clingy? Too talkative? Should I have been more distant and given them more space? Did I seem too weak? Too eager? How should I have maximized my desirability? Regardless, I had surely lost. Perhaps they wanted the satisfaction and validation of conquering me. Playing me for a fool and asserting their superiority by being so distant. Isn't that right? Or is that just insecurity speaking? At what point is it ideal to cut one's losses and walk away?

If someone desperately wants the object of their affection to desire them, does that make them pathetic? Does it make them a loser? If you show more vulnerability and desire than the other person, does that truly make you the weak one in a relationship?

These questions plague our two protagonists and seem to be a driving force behind the main conflict. Since I have also grappled with how much to reveal my own feelings of desire, I find Kaguya-sama: Love Is War to be a particularly fascinating show.

Desire without action

Figure 1.1.3: Our protagonists are gifted with impressively high academic intelligence paired with impressively low emotional intelligence.

The show wastes no time in introducing us to our two main protagonists. Kaguya was born into a family of high stature (and says "ara ara" frequently enough to power a small country of weebs), whereas Shirogane is a "commoner" (Kaguya's word, not mine) who worked hard to reach the pinnacle of the student body. Like timid schoolchildren, they're crushing on each other, and yet they refuse to admit it due to their pride. Instead, they focus on getting their "opponent" to confess their love first.

What stuck out to me immediately is how they both have different ideas of what their relationship would be like. Shirogane envisions Kaguya as blushing, shy, and conventionally cute, whereas Kaguya (thankfully) envisions herself taking absolute dominance over Shirogane (which plenty of people should see coming as a character trait after the anime's very first scene). The bad news about this is that their two fantasies are at odds. The good news about this is that the mangaka has fantastic taste -- you can learn a lot about a storyteller based on the characterization of a love interest or lead character of the author's preferred gender.

In the event that the two of them become an actual couple, I wonder how on Earth they'll reach a compromise as to how they'll treat each other. Perhaps they will have to figure that out before they can even get that intimate.

I appreciate that we get to see both of their perspectives. It hammers home how everyone has a different truth in regards to what they desire and what they experience, and the show does not hold back when it comes to showing just how different these truths can be -- such as a certain lunch-themed sequence that I will talk about later. This works to great dramatic and comedic effect.

That said, when you spend your time fantasizing about what could happen instead of actually taking action, time is not so friendly to you.

Half a year passes.

Figure 1.1.4: Two geniuses dedicate their pride to wasting their life and energy.

Immediately, I got the impression that whoever wrote this segment of the story knows what they're doing. This is too real. And by "too real", I mean I very much appreciate the realism. How many of us have waited for ages (or for eternity) to confess our feelings to a specific someone?

This is the curse of having a crush and being incapable of acting on it. It's also why I hate having crushes.

Manufacturing affection in others, AKA the extraction of vulnerability

Figure 1.1.5: A plan is devised to weaponize jealousy in the name of affection.

To express your truest feelings means being vulnerable. That implies taking a risk and feeling responsible for any potential consequences of rejection, as well as putting our dignity on the line. It would be so much easier for the object of our affection to make themselves vulnerable instead. So instead of being direct and honest, we act indirect. We drop hints. We act suggestively, but not explicitly. We may even place them in situations where we think they are more likely to confess. If they don't pick up on it, we can pretend we didn't mean anything by it. That way, we don't have to risk our dignity. We can just wait for them to make the move.

It sucks.

Incidentally, it sucks even more when both you and your love interest are thinking that way.

It sucks infinitely more when both you and your love interest are COMMITTED to thinking that way.

Someone has to break the deadlock, whether that's immediately or eventually.

If this show isn't one of those romcoms where the status quo never changes ever (judging by the quality of writing, I have faith that it isn't), then at some point, either Shirogane or Kaguya is going to have to be explicit about how they really feel. And it's going to feel scarier to them than anything else they've ever done.

It's gonna be great.

If we could all grow up and live in environments where it's safe and encouraged for all of us to be honest about how we feel and what we want, surely love would be much less painful for so many people.

Chaos theory

Figure 1.1.6: If your prospective lover won't protect you, then your friend definitely will.

Chika is the ideal wild card and agent of chaos in this arena of love.

From a writing perspective, Chika is immensely useful. The mangaka probably could have gotten by without a third character in the mix, but she serves as a catalyst and an unknown element, able to create unpredictability and subversion of expectations. For a comedy-oriented story, this is invaluable.

Blissfully unaware of the mental turmoil that plagues our two lovesick dorks, she is able to unintentionally invalidate whatever schemes that Kaguya or Shirogane spent so much mental energy on, which adds extra comedy and tension for the audience. She is also an effective vehicle for Kaguya's jealousy and projection, as seen in the lunchbox scene which I have so graciously foreshadowed.

Figure 1.1.7: We have confirmed visual on an unidentified fourth person. Chekhov would love this. From their posture, I wonder if they'll be a gloomy character?

Misunderstandings and assumptions

I've heard that most interpersonal conflicts in life emerge from misunderstandings. In the absence of communication, assumptions are born and give rise to misunderstandings.

You may know where I'm going with this. Let's talk about the lunchbox sequence.

Figure 1.1.8 (not pictured because tumblr wishes to deny me of my image spam): Kaguya is too prideful to admit she thinks that a couple is doing something cute.

Figure 1.1.9: Pride is considered a sin for a reason.

From a writing perspective, I was impressed by the lack of romantic intentions in Shirogane in this whole sequence. Not once did he try to get Kaguya to show vulnerability to him. Instead, Kaguya is the only one spinning the situation in a romantic way, while Shirogane's driving force is the misunderstanding that Kaguya is looking down on him for what he eats. Because of this misunderstanding, Shirogane doubles down and makes his food even better, making the situation even more complicated and more stressful for Kaguya. This was definitely my favorite comedy sequence from the first episode.

I appreciate that the show has demonstrated the ability to create these scenarios where one of the characters doesn't even have love on their mind, but there are still romantic thoughts coming from the other character which drives the drama. It gives me a lot of faith in the variety this show will have to offer, and makes me excited to watch more.

When it comes to comedy rooted in misunderstandings, it is important to have miscommunication or lack of communication. In order to resolve a misunderstanding, you need to talk about it. For a pairing as dysfunctional as Kaguya and Shirogane, expecting healthy communication sounds highly unreasonable, which makes them prime material for a whole world of misunderstandings.

Misunderstandings are rooted in assumptions about what the other person meant when they said something or made a certain gesture or expression. When Kaguya glared at Shirogane and his food, he didn't even think to ask "What's the matter?" He just made an assumption about how she felt. I wonder if trying to understand Kaguya's feelings would be considered a sign of weakness by Shirogane?

A prerequisite to initiating an emotional conversation is the desire to understand or be understood by the other person -- assuming that your assumptions haven't already built a narrative for you. It is far easier to make assumptions than it is to attempt any sort of understanding.

In the end, Shirogane fled, unwilling to confront or attempt to understand the intense and passive-aggressive Kaguya. Kaguya feels that she cannot directly ask to try his lunch, so perhaps this is the closest she can get to initiating such a conversation with him at this time. Despite their mind games where they imagine the reactions of their opponent, they still have a lot of difficulty understanding each other.

I am curious to see if this prospective couple's communication skills and emotional intelligence will improve over the course of the story.

The burden of potential romance

Figure 1.1.10: Even the infallible genius Kaguya succumbs to superficial jealousy. It's "mind over matter" versus "matter over mind". That's how the saying goes, right?

Chika is a free spirit, able to ask Shirogane for whatever she wants without being neurotic. That is the power of not being bounded by a crush. Kaguya, who lacks that degree of freedom, briefly loathes her for experiencing something that Kaguya cannot ask for. It's amazing how much someone's feelings for a friend can change without a single word being spoken between them. All it takes is an action, unintentional or not, combined with the raw strength of insecurity. Just as quickly, the status quo can return back to normal too, with the act of properly making up.

To Chika, asking for food from someone doesn't mean anything at all, whereas with Kaguya, it is an admission of defeat. In that sense, a relationship that will only ever be platonic brings peace of mind, whereas a relationship that can be potentially romantic brings leagues upon leagues of anxiety if the outcome is of great concern.

Love is neurotic.

Is love worth the pain? For some people, it is not. For others, the reward is immense -- but only if you can make sure your relationship with this person doesn't end up being a nightmare for your emotional health.

Love and self-identity

The final scene of the episode surprised me in a good way. It's a brief departure from the comedy, and reveals a more heartfelt side of the show.

Kaguya's servant asks her an insightful question. It is substantially more insightful than I would expect from any romcom: "If you fell in love some day, would you wait for that person to confess their love, like now? Or would you confess your love?" I found myself immediately curious to hear Kaguya's answer, since I knew it would be highly informative about her character.

"If that time comes, I would consider the risk of someone stealing him first and come to the one rational conclusion." Even in the realm of love, Kaguya seems precise and calculating. It's as if she hesitates to give a straight answer, but then she confirms: "Of course I would go."

Figure 1.1.11: "Please understand."

It is not embarrassment or rejection that Kaguya fears; it is the absolute destruction of her identity and sense of self. Kaguya is the daughter of a family that practically runs the country. In her mind, everyone yearns for her and wishes to serve her. Turning that around and reaching out to another person to express her own desire would be a direct contradiction of that. It is probably a similar situation for Shirogane, where the infallible self-image he has built up is being put at risk during his romantic duels against Kaguya.

Kaguya clearly feels trapped. She and Shirogane see each other as threats to be conquered, but in reality, they both share a mutual enemy that is much more imposing and insidious: their own simultaneous disgust at the idea of vulnerability.

Their freedom is dominated by their insecurities, and so, even despite their impressive stature, they are still very human. Their upbringing that has lead them to become so accomplished may be more of a curse than a blessing, due to the resulting pride and self-image they likely feel pressured to uphold.

It is hard to cast aside a lie that you have bought into for your whole life.

If our two protagonists wish to have a chance of establishing a healthy romantic relationship, they have a lot of their own demons to overcome first. If they cannot set aside their pride and reach mutual understanding, they have no hope.

Until then, they will both remain trapped in a hell of their own design, however tragically comedic it may be.

My hopes for this story's future

I can tell that the mangaka, unlike far too many writers all over the world, actually seems to have a solid understanding of romance and the conflict that arises within. I've watched too many anime that place huge focus on the "will they or won't they" crap which never runs any deeper than one or both of the characters being too embarrassed to just say what they're thinking, without any sort of convincing mental blocker. In that case, it's clearly just manufactured drama which is designed to pad out the story and waste your time rather than pose interesting questions and themes. In the case of Kaguya and Shirogane, the two of them have substantial communication issues which are depicted in a comedic yet mature way, which I have found engaging.

I very much hope that the show will more deeply explore the themes and questions surrounding the ideas of vulnerability, emotional intelligence, and superiority within relationships. Kaguya and Shirogane have been set up to be great vehicles for such exploration, and I hope the mangaka can capitalize on that, especially if our protagonists can confront these issues directly.

My impression is that the ending will make or break this story. If the mangaka can pull it off well, I can already believe the payoff will be hugely satisfying.

Of course, in order to get to that point, we'll have to see a certain something. It has to do with the most sacred word amongst romcom enthusiasts: "progress". Indeed, after spending chapters upon chapters watching two characters bumble around amidst the same exact status quo, those little signs of advancements in a relationship are highly rewarding.

Underneath all of their aggression, if we can see Kaguya and Shirogane slowly open up to each other and realize the benefits of vulnerability, I think we could witness something really beautiful and really emotionally cathartic.

I've still only seen one episode, but I believe the mangaka has laid a fantastic groundwork for a series and can do a great job developing upon what I've seen so far. On that note, I will surpass our prideful protagonists by opening my heart to this story and entrusting it with my vulnerability, believing it can deliver satisfying development and resolution. You can do it!

Closing thoughts

I did not expect to write so much about a single episode of an ANIME of all things, but here we are. If only I could conjure this kind of power back when I actually needed it in high school English class!

The first episode alone is already so rich with characterization and themes that I managed to find quite a lot to talk about. Given how much I found myself relating to the characters and some of their situations, it's clear to me how this show became so popular. Not only are the animation, direction, and writing excellent, but also many people can probably relate to love feeling like a battlefield.

I do not want to believe in the idea of winners and losers in relationships. That idea creeps into my head whenever I'm having trouble keeping the interest of a new date, and I find myself wondering where those thoughts even come from. Lately, I have been reflecting on the way I relate to other people. Perhaps I've started experiencing this show at a time in my life when I most needed it, and that's why I felt driven to write such a large analysis.

This show poses some very interesting questions about romance that I do not actually know the answer to at the time of writing. I do not know yet how much the show is actually going to explore these themes. Regardless, I appreciate how this show is helping me reflect, and I am curious to see if and how the mangaka will answer some of the questions brought about by the story's themes.

This is a show that I'll most likely have to pace myself with. There was so much to process in this first episode alone. If I went any faster, I'm not sure if I'd even catch all of the details and character moments. I'm excited to move onto the second episode soon.

A highly subjective footnote about my cultured tastes

I'm glad that Kaguya is a sadistic dom with a gentle and vulnerable side, solely on the basis of that being my favorite personality type in a love interest. It also helps that it makes Kaguya's fantasies that much funnier with Shirogane acting so out of character. I feel like this show was made for me.

What was I writing about again? Oh yeah, writing a gigantic wall of text about an anime romcom. Somehow, I spent an entire day on this essay. Hopefully someone got a kick out of it.

[light-miracles]

Fic Writer Review

Thanks @wolfsong02 for tagging me, I rarely do one of these but I might as well try.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

19

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

380224

3. How many fandoms have you written for?

Counting just AO3, and counting DC Comics as a whole fandom, and AtLA and LoK as the same universe: 2 lol

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

1) The Lost Princess-Thirty years ago, Diana was happy. She was Wonder Woman, she was married to the woman she loved and she had a baby girl. But when her baby daughter (apparently) dies, Diana went back to Themyscira and never returned to the outside world. At the same time, Lena is having strange dreams, and she does not know if they are only dreams or they can be something else. She, Kara, and their friends will have to fight a truth that threatens to change everything they knew until then.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/8514457

2) The Women of the Thousand Faces- Lena discovered a truth that destroyed her life and everything went to hell. She and Kara will have to find a way to defeat Veritas, a multidimensional organization that has kidnapped their friends and has only one mission: to kill Lena Luthor to avoid an apocalyptic catastrophe called Crisis on Infinite Earths/Diana's world has been completely destroyed thanks to traps of liars and traitors. Trapped at the End of the World with Alex and Maggie, Diana will have to find a way to get out of the Underworld to find her family.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9624287

3. Finding Jason- Twelve years ago, Batman beat Red Hood in front of all the world, almost killing his own son. As a result the family broke down irremediably and Bruce Wayne was left alone with his darkness. No one has seen or heard of Jason in twelve years. Not even the world's best detective has been able to find him. But one day, Bruce discovers a new clue that could reveal the location of his second son. The clue is eleven years old, has red hair, and Jason's eyes. Her name is Carrie Kelley and according to the innumerable blood tests, she is his granddaughter.

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/16746352)

4. Inside the Iceberg- Kara's not alone inside the iceberg. And every visit has something to tell her.

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/21557041)

5. Something Strange in the Woods- Aang feels there is something wrong with the spirits. With Toph's help, he will have to fix whatever is happening in the woods. But neither of them expected Toph could see in the Spirits World.

(https://archiveofourown.org/works/29351115)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

Yes when they ask for more information about something or when they're so cute they make me smile. And if I don't respond usually is because I don't know what to say 🤣.

6. A fic you've written with the angstiest ending.

The Lost Princess, but just because it wasn't the ending and it continued in The Women of the Thousand Faces.

7. Do you write cross overs?

Yes when they're set in the same universe/multiverse. Also yes to totally random cameos of different characters without more reason than amuse me and save me from the nuisance of creating an OC. Once Batman was investigating a kidnapping in Johnny Bravo's apartment, another time Alex Danvers and Korra played Quidditch in Themyscira.

8. Ever received hate on a fic?

Some times but I barely remember why.

9. Do you write smut?

It can be added as a little scene on a bigger fic but never on its own.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not really.

11. Ever had a fic translated?

I have to literally translate my own fics from Spanish to English so no I do enough translation lmao.

12. Have you ever co written a fic?

In fanfiction.net, a Divergent (Trinine) fic with a friend.

13. All time Fav ship.

Ooff... Like, I can't pick just one. Toph/Aang probably. Kara/Happiness. I have a lot of ships.

14. WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I promised myself I'd finish all my monsters and I will even if I need 84 years.

15. Writing strengths?

When I'm inspired, drama. Comedy. Suspense.

16. Writing weakness?

Doing 10000 words chapters. I can't stop when I think it's not enough and that takes a lot of time.

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

Idk, good if you're not butchering the language. If not directly in English it's faster and easier.

18. First Fandom you wrote for?

In fanfiction.net Teen Titans

In ao3 Supergirl

19. What's your fav fic you've written so far?

It's The Lost Princess. Years passed and I had a Lena crisis but it's the one fic that always brings me confort, not matters how I feel about Canon!Lena.

Tagging @mycomfortblanket @takaraphoenix @cyclone-rachel @boomerangguy

[agent-cupcake]

Cupcake!! Do you listen to music while writing? If yes what kind?

Yes! I absolutely do! I really love music, I’d say it’s secondary to literature as far as my choice of creative input so this is also just my personal recommendations regarding music as a whole with explanations and unwanted commentary because I’m dumb and this is one of my favorite things to talk about.

Firstly, my ongoing(ish) story Beastie and the Bard is musically driven so here are some songs I have on my playlist for that. I tend towards pieces that are melancholy but melodic. Entrancing, perhaps.

Lolita by Ennio Morricone - Contextually, I realize this is a bizarre (even tone deaf) pick given the source material, but... Whatever. This song, in general, just reminds me of Dimitri. Although a heavy, militaristic march might suit him better, the heart rending sound of this song just works for me when I think of him. The piano sets the tone immediately, lingering on some notes in a wistful, sad way. And it is sad, the cello and flute join in to make that clear. But, at a certain point, the instruments begin to dance around together, opening up and almost seeming like they want to resolve the song and create something happier, or at least something bittersweet, only to be drawn back into the uneasy tragedy of the main motif. I dunno, for me, it just absolutely aches like betrayal. 

Shallan’s Lullaby by treefin / Black Piper - This music box rendition of Shallan’s Lullaby from Stormlight was the melodic inspiration for my bootleg lullaby that reader writes for Dimitri (perhaps not the first part as much as the way it shifts around 1:07). It’s haunting.

Isabella’s Lullaby from The Promised Neverland - Pretty self explanatory, I think. This one hits the sweet spot of beautiful and sad, from the harp to the vocals it just fits. 

Howl’s Moving Castle Merry Go Round of Life original and the cover by the Grissini Project - Both versions are incredibly special pieces of music and I’d be surprised if you hadn’t heard this theme before, very good for the more whimsical parts of the story (not that there’s gonna be any more of that).

Shadows of the Lowlands from Xenoblade 2 - While I’m about to recommend this entire soundtrack, this vocal piece is stunning. This guy’s vocals, no joke, sound like a Tolkien Elf. We Are the Chosen Ones is done by the same vocal group and soloist so it’s also making this list although the tone is def a bit different. 

Okay now I’m just gonna point out my favorite soundtracks. For all of these, I have COMPLETELY LEGALLY downloaded most of these from other sites, I’m linking youtube just based on superficial searches to hopefully give you a taste and maybe encourage you to NOT BREAK THE LAW and acquire these soundtracks on your own

Fire Emblem Three Houses - This is obvious and I’m sure you’ve all heard it, but go have a listen if you haven’t. but first, is anyone else disappointed about the Three Houses official release soundtrack? Considering the delay I guess I kinda expected more. Granted, the soundtrack IS phenomenal. Not so much in its entirety, which is emblematic of the game as a whole in some ways, but the set pieces? Unforgettable. This soundtrack is a case study in how powerful a small pool of musical motifs and set-up/pay-offs can be. The little promise of God Shattering Star at the very beginning of the game, Those Who Sow Darkness giving a taste of Shambhala, and then the use of the main melodies of Season of Warfare (Main Theme) and Song of the Nabateans. For the most part, both melodies are used in dramatic songs, creating this unbreakable musical connection between Edelgard and Byleth. Or, if you think about it, Edelgard and the Rhea. For example: the thunder version of Funeral of Flowers doesn’t have the game’s theme, but the rain version does (those two songs were WRITTEN to be layered I stg). And then there’s that somewhat bastardized version of the main theme in At What Cost, highlighting the intended twisting of the usual heroic take on that melody. I do have a potentially unpopular opinion, however. The Apex of the World is boring and tonally dissonant with the final battle in Azure Moon. A lot of people really like Edelgard-Dimitri likes Edelgard! There’s very little heroism in that mission, at least to me, and a song like At What Cost would have fit SO MUCH BETTER. I mean, that is also Edelgard’s theme so hearing that being twisted up into this decidedly more dark song would be thematically appropriate to her ultimate choice. The title also just seems like it suits her and Dimitri. Edelgard claims that she has weighed the cost of war, she believes she is capable of taking on the cost of victory without really knowing what it would be. Dimitri's whole story was him trying to find revenge no mater what the cost and now that he has it, he’s fully understanding what it will cost him. I understand why they would use the traditional hero song to cap the route, but it seems weird that they’d be willing to subvert so many other aspects of tradition while holding to that for a song that, in my opinion, is the least interesting of all the final battle songs. As you can probably tell, At What Cost is a song that is very tonally inspiring to me. I also love Funeral of Flowers (Thunder and Rain separately and layered together), The Long Road, and Roar of Dominion for getting hyped to write.

Final Fantasy VII Remake - Ever since I got this soundtrack, I’ve been addicted. I really don’t have much to say on this one other than just to recommend you give it a listen if you’re even passingly interested in orchestral video game music. There’s some misses for me (specifically the Wall Market stuff and anything that gets into the weird electric guitar/techno stuff) but it’s overwhelmingly fantastic and can work for active listening music and for background music while you write. I’d follow up recommend you get ahold of the Acoustic Arrangements soundtrack. I can’t link you on this one but it’s worth the extra legwork to procure it COMPLETELY LEGALLY. 

Final Fantasy Distant Worlds - I was actually able to see the Distant World’s tour when it swept through Houston and at that point I had no idea what the fuck a Final Fantasy was. At all. However, seeing One Winged Angel live is not something I will ever forget. Ever. This soundtrack is great for some background listening and although it is often too upbeat for my usual tastes, it’s good when I need something easier. Okay. Real talk. I was about to recommend to you a bunch of FFXIV music (the MMO), choice selections from FFXV, and try and dig up some songs that are only available in live recordings. If you like Final Fantasy music, I recommend all of these things. The games are a clusterfuck but the music is even moreso and it’s worth your time if you like this kind of thing.

Xenoblade 2 - See? Told you I was gonna recommend this. Actually, ranking wise, I would say that I like it more than Final Fantasy. This soundtrack is magical. I cannot stress that enough, there is a level of whimsy and beauty that went into this soundtrack that all at once draws upon the genre and being it’s own thing. Like, I get it, there’s a lot of misses. The electric guitar is jarring and annoying. Listen to Sea of Clouds, like, actually listen to it. Listen to Desolation. Pay attention to the motif used in connection with Elysium and then the other songs that its used in. The Power of Jin. This is a sometimes sad but mostly beautiful and whimsical soundtrack that is good for listening and for using as background music. 

Xenoblade 1 - I don’t have as much to say about this one, I don’t feel as if it’s as emotionally resonant as my other recommendations. BUT it is gorgeous. The area themes are wonderful and perfect for setting tone. 

Hollow Knight - Hollow Knight’s soundtrack takes one step back from the drama of the others and revels in its depressive simplicity. There are songs with a more cheerful tone, and the magical whimsy of Xenoblade 2 is very much brought to life in many of the pieces, but for the most part the soundtrack is as gorgeously melancholy as the game itself. One of my favorite things in music is when songs are given new life through new context and the White Palace --> Pale Court transition is haunting. 

Diabolik Lovers - OKAY I KNOW I KNOW hear me out. This soundtrack has no right to be as gorgeous, emotional, or quality as it is. This song, Lovers, is the younger sibling of Lolita’s theme, okay? Thematically, that’s kinda hilarious, but I mean it. If you like that song, give a few of the songs from this OST a chance.

BioShock, BioShock 2, and BioShock Infinite - BioShock 1&2 are different from Infinite. A lot more grungy, a lot more angry and discordant, the strings buzz and there’s a lot more horror to it all. Infinite, on the other hand, is very pretty. Infinite’s soundtrack is about the characters and their journey and feelings. The first two game’s soundtracks are about the ruined city of Rapture. It depends on what you’re in the mood for. I write using Infinite’s music more often, but there’s pieces in the first two that capture this empty, yearning feeling that is good for setting mood.

Pathologic - “Half Life’s soundtrack directed by Genghis Khan.” It’s bizarre. It’s grungy. 

Void (Typrop) - Basically the same deal. I dunno man, I like being inspired by horror.

Outlast - It’s an orchestral horror game soundtrack. Like the game itself, there’s a lot of horror movie inspiration. 

Dishonored 1 and Dishonored 2 - This is mostly background music. It’s a stealth game so it’s kinda uneasy, but I think there’s something really unique. Maybe the instruments? There’s a lot of weird sounds used. 

Higurashi - This is a compilation of horror themed songs from the anime soundtrack, but the VN soundtrack and the non-horror stuff is pretty good, too. Michishirube is my favorite.

Madoka Magica Rebellion - The main anime soundtrack is gorgeous. The bells, the strings, the drama... I’m recommending Rebellion specifically because it’s the more cohesive and story-driven soundtrack. This one is not as horror-ish and weird than the others, it is very beautiful and nice to listen to. Sad, in some parts, too. 

Code Geass and Resurrection - Brass? Got it. Dramatic strings? Got it. Bombastic set piece songs? Triple got it. This soundtrack oozes style. In some ways, that makes it not good for writing, but in others it can. Depends on what you’re writing. I think the melodrama can be incredibly useful for getting my mind in that frenzy state. 

Okay I’m done. Thank you for bearing with me. 

If we’re talking what songs inspire specific things, the Ferdinand piece was accompanied by a lot of the Diabolik Lovers soundtrack and Final Fantasy. When I wrote my sad Felix piece, it was all about Hollow Knight with a spot of Bloodborne and Dark Souls.  

[quirkwizard]

Spoiled Sushi

For a while, a certain article has been vexing me. One that seems to have a great misunderstanding of the series it was writing about, missing obvious points and core parts of the worldbuilding. No, it wasn’t by CBR, nor was it by Screenrant. But it was by Cruchyroll of all places. They decided to make an article about the Top 5 Misused Quirks in My Hero Academia. It was not good and has been bugging me. So I decided to give them a taste of their own medicine. I mean they try to shut down whoever even attempts to do what they do, so why not make fun of them for trying to do what I do? Plus you guys seem to like it when I’m snarky, so this could be fun for everyone.

For clarity’s sake, this was written at the beginning of 2019, when the most recent chapter was Chapter 214 and the the anime had only reached Season 3. I’m keeping that in mind as I write. I will also be skipping around some of the parts of the article as I am talking about it. If its not worth mentioning, I won’t bring it up, simple as that. For instance, I’m skipping the intro because it is completely superfluous and would only serve to make a completely different fanbase mad. Might as well, most of what I am passing up are just dumb jokes. But if you are curious... don’t waste your time reading this. Your time is valuable and you have better things to do then read this article.

5. Kurogiri Can Create Free, Renewable Energy

“In all seriousness, though, Kurogiri is probably one of the most powerful characters in the anime, with their being virtually no limit to how far he can extend his Warp Gate portals.”

I mean there are certainly limits for his Quirk. Besides the need to know the coordinates or see where he is moving, there’s obviously a limit to how much he can spread out his body.

“Why then doesn’t he use them to create near-infinite energy? Open two portals one above another, throw in a heavy object inside and watch it fall endlessly. Devise a way to hook a dynamo or something to it and, bam, you have free power that would make Kurogiri a billionaire overnight and a hero to the entire planet.”

This idea has so many problems that I don’t even know where to begin.

One, if this could work, it likely wouldn’t make a lot of energy. Besides the various physics problems involved in this, Kurogiri would just be one guy doing this, meaning that it’s unlikely he’d be able to make enough power to matter.

Two, Kurogiri would still need rest as he is a living being, meaning he wouldn’t to keep up this theoretical contraption forever and you’d get even less energy relying on him. At most, it would work best in a small bunker as a last resort.

Three, that sounds like it would be a lot more dangerous then it would be worth for the energy made. If Kurogiri would to lose focus for a moment, the portals fall apart and there would just be a lot of damage from this heavy object moving at high speeds.

“Even if Kurogiri only cares about taking down All Might, it would still be much easier to do if he had a literal mountain of money/public goodwill at his side.”

What kind of bizzaro universe are you living in where the guy who makes energy could possibly turn public option about the very well liked Number 1 Hero that saves lives every day? That’s literally what Lex Luthor does and people hate him for it.

4. Koji Koda Could Help Feed Billions Of People

“Koji is the resident Class 1-A stoner (get it? he's made of rock? come on) with the power to control ANY creature in the animal kingdom. This would logically also include spiders, meaning that Koji could literally end all street crime in, like, 5 minutes tops by swallowing all the criminals up in a giant arachno-tsunami.”

While this article is infuriating in many ways, it did give us the mental image of an “arachno-tsunami”. Which is totally worth sitting through this jumbled mess of words and ignorance.

“But, you see, Koji is just too shy and nice to be an effective hero. He wants to do good but he just doesn’t have that fighter instinct in him. Which is why he should instead use his Anivoice Quirk to revolutionize agriculture all around the world.”

You can be an effective hero and not beat people up. Sure, it certainly can come up in the job description, but that isn’t all of what a hero is meant to do. Koda’s Quirk makes him great at information gathering and rescue work, two very important aspects of hero work that suit his personality perfectly.

“Give him a megaphone and fly him over American fields, telling feral pigs to stop causing $1.5 billion worth of damage a year in destroyed crops. Fly him to Australia to tell the invasive cane toads and rabbits to kindly lemming themselves off a cliff. Have him tell the aggressive lionfish the get the hell out of the Atlantic. FORCE HIM TO GET OVER HIS FEAR OF BUGS AND MAKE AGRICULTURAL PESTS A THING OF THE PAST. “

There is no possible way Koda could be everywhere at once to pull that off. And considering that the average human voice can only carry for about a mile, IE, about the average size of a single farm. You know, because animals need to hear his voice in order to receive his commands. So even if it was limited to a single farm, its unlikely to do much to help. But by far the biggest issue with this entire plan is that what Koda does to an animal is not permanent. The second his control is interrupted, the animals return to normal, bound to just go back to whatever they were doing before. 

So if Koda tries to change anything, its just going to end up undone by the time he leaves, just delaying the inevitable problem that comes from these animals. So even if Koda told the pigs to go away, they’d likely be back by the next day, destroying farmland like nothing happened. Even then, because of the previous limitations, he’d still have to go farm by farm to pull it off. That’s not even mentioning all of the other suggestions. Honestly, if you wanted to do something with Quirk, you should just convince all the animals to line up during hunting season. Dark, yes, but it least it would offer a more permanent solution then what the writer is suggesting.

“If Koji was utilized properly, he could travel the world undoing mankind’s mistakes and creating organic, pesticide-free crops instead of doing what he does now, which is largely sitting around on his ass roleplaying Snow White.”

Which, in spite of many fans joking about his Quirk, has shown to be very helpful quite a few times.

3. Inko Midoriya Would Have Made A Great Nurse

“Izuku’s mother in My Hero Academia has mainly done two things so far: jack and squat.”

I mean she did design Izuku’s costume, even if it got replaced, its is still a corner stone of his design, and she offered a good amount of drama after the fight with All Might and All For One. 

“She did try to be a good mother but kind of failed at that when she tearfully apologized to her son because he was born without a Quirk, essentially telling him: “I’m so sorry I gave birth to such a loser.””

Would you believe that this one line was what really prompted me to talk about this? Because that is probably one of the worst takes I have ever in relation to this series. If you honestly believed that is what Inko was doing, the woman who practically raised her child by herself and constantly talks about much she cares for him, you must be watching the wrong series. That’s the only way I could explain why that is.

“So, she doesn’t really have much going on in her life. That’s why she should try nursing instead. I realize that becoming a nurse takes a lot of hard work and dedication, but Inko would be a natural fit for it. Despite her initial shortcomings, she is a very caring person with loads of empathy.” 

Inko’s empathic? Could have fooled me. I mean she did feel the need to apologize to her son for giving birth to a loser. No, I am not over that, how could you have possibly gotten that from the scene?!

“She also has the power of limited telekinesis. Inko can move small objects over short distances, and while that would not be helpful for stopping crime, it would be great for, say, removing kidney stones. Or things stuck in people’s throats. Or coins from children’s stomachs.”

Trying to use a Quirk like this in any kind of medical procedure is laughable at best and dangerous at worst. Imagine if Inko had to remove a bullet from someone. From what we see, the process of her moving objects is slow and need several pulls from her to attract the object to her. So if she’s going to try to pull it out and its going to get caught on something, causing more damage to the person she is trying to save. She’s basically going to be keying the insides of whoever she is trying to operate on.

The entire reasons doctors, especially surgeons, train for so long is because the human body can be extremely delicate. It needs a lot of care and time so the doctors don’t make things worse for the patients. It’s why surgeons need to have such steady hands and a lot of time even to due minor procedures. But trying to do that with a Quirk is just going to cause more problems then it can solve. Doing that with a Quirk like Inko’s just lacks a lot of the precision and dexterity necessary to pull this off.

2. Uraraka Should Go Work For A Shipping Company

“Ochaco Uraraka has one of the most well-rounded Quirks out of all the main characters: Zero Gravity. With it, she can make objects and people float, which is great for offense, defense, and rescue operations. As a superheroine, she is doing everything right with her Quirk.”

I mean “Zero Gravity” can kind of be used offensively, but not effectively as other Quirks. Its why she did all of that training with Gun Head to make up for her lack of an offensive presence. Eh, two of three ain’t bad. I’ll take what I can get.

“I just think Uraraka should never have become a superheroine in the first place. Uraraka has actually always been honest about her motivation: she wants dem YEN YEN BILLS YO (for her struggling family.)”

That’s because hero work is an extremely frugal business even super minor heroes can still seem to make a decent living out of it.

“But regular jobs also exist in that world, and that must include shipping companies that would instantly hire Uraraka to Zero-G their freighters, trucks, and planes. Even if she cannot make them float, she can still remove enough gravity from them to save the company tons of fuel. Company profit margins are razor thin.”

First off, its mentioned several times that if you want to use a Quirk for a job, you need to have a hero license. Its to make sure you know how to use your Quirk properly so you don’t end up hurting someone with your powers. So for her to even try this, she needs to go through hero school anyway. Might as well get the most out of it. Second, Uraraka cannot lower the gravity of her target. Either the object is floating or it isn’t floating. There is no in between for Uraraka. 

Third, given what we’ve seen from Uraraka, there is no possible way that she could ever lift that much. She’s barely able to lift three lower numbered robots and that was only for a few seconds. So, at the most, she can lift a few tons. How exactly do you expect her to work with something like a cargo plane, which, on its own, can weight over forty five tons, not including fuel or any extra cargo?

Which is another thing I noticed throughout the article: the writer seems to severely overestimate how effective Quirks actually are. The range and scope of Quirks is much smaller then other power systems, even when compared to similar “low level” series like HunterxHunter. Like every kind of application listed goes far beyond what most Quirks are capable of, such as forgetting certain drawbacks. And that is most notable with the last suggestion.

1. Momo Could Solve Literally All The World’s Problems

I bet Kohei Horikoshi was really proud of himself when he came up with Momo Yaoyorozu’s design: No, see, she HAS to dress scantily because her Quirk is Creation, i.e. the ability to create any object she wants through her skin, which must be constantly exposed. Peachy.”

Oh boy, it wouldn’t be any sort of discussion about Momo without beating that long dead horse. What’s next? Bakugou angry? Izuku cry? 

“Momo can apparently create anything as long as she understands its composition, and seeing as she’s made an ethanol spray can, infrared goggles, a lighter, and a tracker, it seems like there’s nothing she cannot make.”

Oh boy, it wouldn’t be any sort of discussion about Momo without a grievous misunderstanding of how her Quirk works either. Maybe they are in the fandom. As I have mentioned in my Momo Misconceptions post, Momo needs fat to make what she does. She’s not an alchemist where she can just clap her hands and make whatever she wants. If she doesn’t have enough fat, she cannot make items. By those very rules, some things are just out of her reach because it would just take too much fat. It’s why she limits herself to simpler items.

“Cool. MAKE US SOME HELIUM THEN. The world is running out of the gas and we need it for MRI scanners and the like. Momo could make more of it.”

Actually, we don’t even know for sure if Momo is capable of making gases. All we have seen her make is solids and a few liquids. There is the lighter she made, but that could easily run on lighter fluid.

“Or thorium. She could make thorium that we could use to make thorium-based reactors that are apparently way safer than uranium ones.”

Thorium isn’t even that rare, just as about as common as lead and three times as common as uranium. Even if it was a problem, it would likely kill her, either from burning through all of her fat or from the exposure to radiation.

“Medicine, fresh water, cheap electronics that we could send to developing countries: Momo could crank all of those out in an afternoon.“

Yes, in theory, Momo could do that, but not the extent that she would make a major difference in the world like they are suggesting. There are just more practical and better long term solutions then trying to force a single person to do all of that. It’s almost as if Momo is a regular human being who has limitations you need to keep in mind when making these ill informed suggestions.

“And while spending your life as a walking Everything Faucet might not seem that glamorous, it actually has the potential to change the entire planet for the better.”

Given the kind of set up and effort that would be required to even attempt that, I think “horrific” would be a more appropriate descriptor since it would be done to a living, thinking person.

Honestly, I think that most of these people are doing more with their Quirks now then with any of these suggestions. At least, when you actually think about the rules and limits of the characters. Sure, Inko isn’t doing much, but she is a civilian with a fairly weak Quirk. Kurogiri acts as a major player within the League, getting them around quickly and evading capture. I mean he is using his power to help out a bunch of villains, but my point still stands that he is not “misusing” his Quirk.

In fact, a majority of the people on this list are doing more to help people and save lives by being heroes. Given the limitations of their abilities, using them to stop superpowered criminals who risking damaging the people around and helping victims of these crimes is doing then any of those roles in spite of the fact that the article tries its best to downplay that these people are already saving lives. So, in reality, they are doing far more to help people then doing any of these ideas, you damp sock of a writer.

[thecaffeinebookwarrior]

The Many Faces of the Strong Female Character

The much-requested, positive counterpart to my classic “Female Characters to Avoid in Your Writing” and it’s much-later sequel.  

Here, I will discuss some of my favorite fictional ladies and what makes them work so well;  given my rapturous love of women, there will probably be a sequel!  In the meantime, I talk more about portraying female characters here.

Happy writing, everybody!  <3

1.)  The Warrior

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When most people hear “strong female character,” they picture the most popular definition of the term:  a stony-faced, emotionally shallow, conventionally attractive broad who punches and kicks stuff.  She may occasionally shout things like, “I DON’T NEED NO MAN,” while perhaps punching a small baby. 

I decided to start with my wife Diana, because she is the perfect antithesis of this trope.  She isn’t stony, she’s courageous.  She’s unabashed about showing her doubts, hopes, affections, and optimism.  Her love interest never steals her spotlight, but she feels no need to shun romance to appear “strong.”  She’s beautiful, but not sexualized or objectified.

And while most Strong Female Characters™ are ironically reduced to damsels in distress at some point in their own narratives, Diana consistently takes the lead, totally autonomous over her own story.

You can kick ass AND love babies, people.  Joss Whedon, please take notes.

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Other examples:  Okoye from Black Panther, Furiosa from Mad Max: Fury Road, Rey from Star Wars, and Ser Brienne of Tarth from Game of Thrones.

2.)  The Comedian

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If you haven’t watched Chewing Gum on Netflix, stop whatever you’re doing and watch it right now.  Its relatively simple premise – a twenty-four-year-old from a fundamentalist Christian household struggles to lose her virginity – is a segway into a hilarious, genuine exploration of human sexuality, relationships, and how we forge our identities.

Brilliantly portrayed by the series’ creator, Michaela Coel, Tracy is essentially that one friend who knows exactly what you’ve been thinking and isn’t afraid to say so.  She is never relegated to a single trope or stereotype.  She’s stumbling, clumsily but enthusiastically, through the life experiences that shape us.  Most importantly, she is allowed to be sexually curious, awkward, aggressive, insecure, and – I can’t stress this enough – hilarious.  The dialogue is infinitely quotable, and endlessly relatable. 

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Watching shows like Chewing Gum makes me realize how few female characters – and even fe wer Black female characters – are portrayed as truly human.  Typically, they’re allowed to be sexy, but not sexual.  They’re allowed to be awkward, but only if it’s cute.  They can be insecure, but only if that insecurity can easily be solved by the affirmations of a male love interest.  And they’re rarely allowed to be the main source of a series’ comedy.  

So remember:  let your female characters be human.  Let them be awkward, funny, sexual philosophers.  It’s easier than you think.  

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Other examples:  Abbi and Ilan from Broad City, Leslie from Parks and Rec, Tina from Bob’s Burgers.

3.)  The Drama Queen

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Watching Riverdale is like hurtling along on a structurally unstable rollercoaster.  It’s utterly insane, a lot of fun, and once you’re on, you can’t stop.

But amidst the explosions of batshit crazy plot points, killer cults, and the existential perplexity of finding yourself attracted to emo Jughead, there are some real gems.  One of these is Cheryl Blossom, and pretty much every plot line surrounding her.

Cheryl is introduced as a fairly one-dimensional, catty mean girl, though the Regina George-esque charisma with which she’s portrayed makes her instantly likable.  Initially, we expect her to be a character we’ll love to hate.

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And yet, within the first few episodes, I was impressed by how layered and complex her motivations were.  Much of contempt towards others was misdirected rage from an upbringing of extreme emotional abuse, and grief over her dead brother -- all portrayed without a Snape-style condonation of said behavior.  By the end of season one, my thoughts were generally, “Oh, crap, I don’t think I can claim to be watching this ‘ironically’ anymore,” and “MORE CHERYL.”

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Season two answered my wish, and then some.  Cheryl was saved from an (impressively conscientiously portrayed) attempt at sexual assault by a pack of her female friends, and her attacker got the shit beat out of him in one of the most cathartic moments of modern television.

To the exaltation of my queer heart, she also came out as a lesbian, in a deeply moving story arc that I never would have expected from this show.  Without spoiling too much, she and her new love interest kissing in front of anti-gay propaganda footage was legitimately one of the most powerful moments I have ever witnessed.

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Before the season was over, she viciously threatened her abusive, homophobic mother while covered in blood, shot a serial killer with a bow and arrow, and joined a gang.  If that’s not gay culture, I don’t know what is.

Oh, how I wish this show was just about her.

Other examples:  Alexis from Schitt’s Creek.

4.)  The Lovable Bastard

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Ah, The Good Place.  I have never experienced such a breath of comedic fresh air.  A new philosophical principle each episode, examined and applied in hilarious and thought-provoking ways.  A complete absence of harmful stereotypes.  Incredibly lovable, three-dimensional, and ever-evolving characters. 

I was considering using my queen Tahani for this list, who externally larger-than-life and internally vulnerable after emotional abuse by her parents.  Also, she’s hilarious.  Everyone and everything in The Good Place is hilarious.  And I also thought about talking about Janet, who is the best character in anything ever, but of course:

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Instead, I’ll be talking about bisexual icon Eleanor, who is something very few female characters get to be:  the lovable bastard.

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Eleanor, when we first meet her, is not traditionally good in any sense of the word.  She turned down a high-paying job because she was expected to be nice to people.  She sold placebos to the elderly, and was great at it.  She was drunken, slovenly, hedonistic, and selfish.  And she’s instantly incredibly likable.

Why and how Eleanor is so enjoyable, even at her very worst, merits an essay all its own.  But in a nutshell:

We empathize with her.  We are introduced to “The Good Place” completely through her eyes.  We are in her shoes.  

The stakes are high.  When we discover that her entry into the good place was a mistake, we want her to be okay.

We come to understand her, and how her terrible childhood shaped her destructive behavior.  

She wants to be a better person, and with time, effort, and character development, we watch her become one. 

Not only is this an amazing lesson in how to endear audiences to your character, it is also infinitely refreshing.  The most famous lovable bastards are all men --  Han Solo, Dr. House, Captain Jack Sparrow, the Man With No Name, et cetera -- but women are rarely afforded the same moral complexity.  If a woman in fiction has done bad things, she’s not usually a lovable bastard.  She’s usually a bitch. 

Eleanor isn’t just a great character.  She conveys an important lesson:  women are people.  People with the same capacity for mistakes, growth, redemption, and love as anyone else.

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Other examples: Chloe from Don’t Trust the B*tch in Apartment 23

5.)  The Cinderella

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Yep.  I said it.  Cinderella is a strong female character.

My girl not only survived in an abusive household, she persistently stayed positive.  She worked each day to make the best of an impossible situation, from which she had no means of escape.  That takes an insane amount of courage and tenacity. 

But Caff, I hear you scream, she needed help to escape!!  Well, my imaginary counterargument, so the fuck what?  MOST people need help to escape their abusive situations, and there’s no shame in that.  Accepting help from someone you trust is the best thing you can do in a situation such as that, and implying otherwise is horribly damaging to victims of abuse.  

But she married the prince, you more feebly protest.  Yes!  She did!  She found love and happiness and a great life in a socially influential position!  And that’s an amazing message!

So in the flurry of female warriors, let’s not forget Cinderella, who tells people that their terrible circumstances won’t last forever, to stay hopeful and kind, and that accepting help from a trusted friend can lead to a happy life.  

Cinderella is a bad bitch, and she deserves her happily ever after.

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Other examples:  For some reason, I’m thinking of Sansa from Game of Thrones.  When people try to discredit her as a strong character, they often make similar complaints.  But both, quite fittingly, end up as queens.