#ep 12 was VERY good I still very much wanted to finish this

[breezy-cheezy]

Tristamp may be finished but I’m not. This has been in the works for awhiiiile I just draw slowwwww

Just my hopes for episode 12 before it came out. We kinda got there! More people reminding Vash he’s loved please :’‘>

Please don’t tag this with ship tags, thanks!

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Bunch of Stuff Coming in August

July 2023 Wk 5

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Laws of Attraction (Sat iQIYI) 2-3 of 8 - Oh good, we now know that Thailand has the same statutory rape laws as the US. Dub con is as dub con does. MEANWHILE Oh my God I love evil lawyer cutie so much. Him and his beautiful weaponized smile, maybe my new favorite character. I like the way this director is playing with noir mystery tropes, settings, and archetypes too - it’s feeling very 60s pulp, I’m getting gay Travis McGee vibes. Grandma knowing that her grandson likes boys is so sweet. I have to be completely frank here, this is what I wanted from both Manner of Death and KP. I truly love this show

Hidden Agenda that isn’t hidden (Sun GMMTV YouTube) ep 3 of 10 - It’s a very Cyrano de Bergerac kind of narrative... If Cyrano fell in love with Christian instead of Roxanne. Mock date was fun. 

Low Frequency (Sat iQIYI) ep 4 of 8 - Into the lion’s den. Investigation begins. Why isn’t the ghost acting lookout? Who are these random side characters? I’m confused. Half way through kiss is right on schedule tho. 

Wedding Plan (Weds YT & iQIYI) ep 2 of 7 - The kiss was nice, but it’d be nicer if Nuea had punched Lom. Manipulative arse. A trash watch is happening!

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 4 of 12 - Meh. 

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI) ep 5 of 8 eps - The hazing has begun + secret relationship and it’s kinda like a v soft SOTUS. Dino is getting a bit too controlling and obsessive for me so it slid down the ranks. I much prefer La Cusine’s version of this dynamic. The friends protecting Dino’s interests were funny tho - boy is so obsessed he outsources his stalking. 

Be My Favorite (Fri YouTube) ep 10 of 12 - Max is BEST BOY. I hate Kawi. Tra la la. Trash watch here.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Jun & Jun (Korea Thurs Viki) 2 of 8 - Our ex idol is a total FLIRT. Nice to see an uke with agency. I mean baby girl is a newbie worker bee… but still flirty, good for you, sweetie. I see your little lip bite and so does your soon to be husband. Speaking of, I love Choi Jun’s style of seme aggression: a little sleezy + a bit too handsy + ultra clever with his words. Plus tie tug!!! Also threatening to take off your TAILORED suit so baby wears your shirt and smells like you? HOT. Boy you sped right past American style and into Italian - that’s real Corinthian leather, that is. 

Stay By My Side (Taiwan Fri Gaga) 5 of 10 eps - Mid series kiss right on schedule. Thank you for never upsetting me, Taiwan. Omg. Such boyfriends. Only Taiwan gets this sappy. I have to say, I watch this show after Tokyo on purpose. (I need the pallet cleanser.) Still, I’m scared that the perception will be that Bu Xia is using Jiang Chi, not in love with him, when the truth about ghosts comes out. Why doesn’t BX’s useless sister do something for her disaster brother? I guess JC likes a needy boy? Oh no, the kiss confusion. Lip touch but rejection (?). Nooooo. I suppose they have to draw this out for 10 eps. Gah, they’re so cute. But BX is a bit dim, isn’t he? Poor thing. 

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) 4 of 12 eps - Shin is such a worrywart, over protective, over the top boyfriend. I guess we saw a little bit of give from Minato? More than usual, baby steps. This is Japan after all.

Tokyo in April is... AKA Shigatsu no Tokyo wa (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - Japan’s favorite trope = the running of the gays. Kazama knows everything now. Ep ends on one of my few triggers. SKIP! Japan you better NOT go there.

Vian the series (Vietnam YouTube ) ep 11-12fin - terrible ending, he turned back into a cat and the whole thing was pointless. I am very annoyed. 4/10 FATALLY FLAWED 

It’s airing but ...

Stay With Me ... NO I WILL NOT! And you can’t make me.

In case you missed it

Stay (Pinoy YouTube) finished its run at 7 eps. It’s mostly English & set in LA (shudder) so I did not bother. I say little to no chatter about this (that’s normal with the Pinoy stuff tho). Did anyone watch and enjoy? 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Coming August 2023

8/1 Stay Still (Hong Kong Tues YouTube) 5 eps - Yes we have had BL from Hong Kong before, but that was... before... who knows what it’ll be like now. Hayden, moves into a new apartment and starts a complicated relationship with his neighbor’s grandson, Damien, after an unexpected kiss. Meanwhile: Archie rekindles a romance with his high school sweetheart, Kelvin, who is now married.

8/11 Love Class Season 2 (Korea Fri Viki) 10 eps - Hyun, Minwoo and Joo-Hyuk are looking forward to their freshman year at college. But trials and tribulations of love that await them outside the classroom: from learning about maturity to being unable to forget the scars of past lovers. (All new cast from season 1.) 

8/12 My Personal Weatherman AKA Taikan Yoho (Japan Sat ????) 8 eps - hum. 

8/19 Love in Translation (Thai Sat One31) ? eps - Two strangers start working in a cafe together.

8/20 My Universe series begins (Thai Sun iQIYI) 24 episodes - This is sampler pack BL, 12 pairs, each pair gets 2 episodes, not entirely sure on the order they’ll drop in. Known couples include EarthBank from Destiny Seeker and KaownahTurbo from Love Stage!!!, mostly fresh faces otherwise. Jane to direct several. 

8/22 Kisseki: Dear to Me formerly known as Miracle (Taiwan Tues ????) 13 eps - From screenwriter Lin Pei Yu (We Best Love, H3: Trapped) features a student doctor forced to take care of a gangster. I love the premise and like the writer, I’m thinking Viki or Gaga will get this one.  

8/24 Man Suang (Thailand movie domestic cinemas) - historical drama about Thai burlesque with KP’s MileApo. Tong is in this one too? 

8/? Sing My Crush previously Follow The Wind (Korea ????) 8 eps - supposed to have released in the first half of 2022 this is a adaption of Myung’s webtoon, from the director of My Sweet Dear, and the Love Tractor production house, looks like Korea does About Youth.

8/? Why R U? (Korean remake)  is supposed to be out this month, filming started in sept 22. I find everything about this hilarious. I mean if Korea remakes it, we lose all the sexy and then... would we have a story at all? No we would not. Not even for six short eps. It’d be like one of those mesh shopping bags. 

We can probably expect a new BL from GMMTV too, to slot into BMF’s spot mid month. 

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

I do love a hyung romance, and this aggressive ghost-ish thing is working for me. (Low Frequency) 

Hidden Agenda + My Ride. 

So coy

I agree with @heretherebedork​ that these two make a great side couple but I am utterly in love with...

HER. (All Laws of Attraction.) 

(Last week)

[dragonwritersblog]

She Was Like A Sunflower

Read on AO3

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12

UM!!! EP 2 WAS SO GOOD!!!!! GUMMI GOO😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭!!!!!!! Um yeah that's all I have to say, sorry this is late lmao. Hopefully I'll get back to a better schedule soon. Also, trigger warning for child abuse in the first few paragraphs in this chapter as it does go into detail with Jack's backstory. As always I will put (1) when it starts and (2) when it finishes. All I want is for my audience to feel safe so if this is something that you know you can't read please don't feel ashamed skipping this. Stay safe xx.

3. Seven

And I've been meaning to tell you I think your house is haunted Your dad is always mad and that must be why And I think you should come live with Me and we can be pirates Then you won't have to cry - Seven by Taylor Swift

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(1)

“Jack! Jack! Get out here you little shit!”

A five-year-old boy whimpered at the loud voice, crouching behind a garden shed in the backyard. He held his breath, begging for the voice not to find him. In his arms he held a small, trembling baby rabbit, its nose twitching in panic as they hid.

“You can’t hide forever Jack!”

The young boy had come home from school, wanting to get into the house and not bother anyone. He had to be good, he will be good! But sometimes, good didn’t seem to be enough. Even when he was ‘good’ they still hurt him…

That was when he saw Luke, kicking a baby rabbit in the front yard. The poor thing was limping, it had probably wandered too far from its mama, now Luke was torturing it for his own amusement. He begged Luke to stop, to do something else, but the teenager had gripped his face and growled at the child to mind his own business. Jack didn’t know why he did it, maybe it was a reflex from the sudden fright he felt, but he kicked Luke in the stomach, leaving the older boy winded. There was nothing but red-hot rage in Luke’s eyes, that’s how Jack knew how much trouble he was really in.

So he picked up the rabbit, ran through the house and out into the back garden, now he was here. He heard Luke’s footsteps on the grass. Jack held his breath, forcing himself to not make any sudden noise. The seconds were achingly long, his heart pounding against his chest as he tried to hear if Luke was approaching or not. The footsteps stopped, Jack squeezed his eyes shut, as though this were all a nightmare and he would be waking up soon.

Unfortunately he was very much awake when a hand grabbed him by the hair and through him onto the open ground, forcing him to drop the baby rabbit. “You think you can get away with that?! Huh?!” Luke mocked, kicking the boy in the stomach as Jack let out a cry. “Come on! Finish what you started!”

“I’m sorry Luke! I’m sorry!” Jack wailed as the teen kicked him in the knees. “It was an accident!”

Luke paused, a sadistic grin creeping on his face as a vile idea came to mind, “Accident? Heh, I’ll show you an accident.”

His eyes darted to the baby rabbit still limping on the ground and marched towards it. Jack looked up from the ground, pushing himself up as he scanned the grass for the rabbit. It was only when he heard a crunch and a distressed squeak did his heart plummet to the pit of his stomach. Luke stomped on the little rabbit over and over again, little squeals leaving it as it writhed in pain. “No!” Jack cried, trying to stand despite his aching limbs. “Luke, stop it! Please, stop!”

Luke ignored him, continuing his attack on the poor creature. Jack tried to stand as quick as he could, the blood rushing to his head as he swayed on his feet. By the time he was fulling standing it was too late. There was nothing left of the rabbit but a mangled corpse and a manic sneer on Luke’s face. The blond teen turned to the young boy, shrugging as it he only flicked a piece of dust off his shirt, “What? It was just an accident?”

Suddenly, Jack didn’t feel the lightness in his head anymore. He squeezed his fists, a rush of adrenaline rushing through his veins as he screamed, running to Luke and tackling him to the ground. The blond wasn’t expecting this reaction, letting out a screech as he felt sharp nails scratch across the skin on his face.

“How dare you!” Jack screamed, not ceasing. “He did nothing to you! Why did you kill him?!” There were stains of red, Luke grunted as he tried to stop the scratching but Jack’s hands were too fast for him to catch. “I hate you!”

When Luke finally caught one of Jax’s hands, did clarity start to fill the young boy, along with the fearful dread. He tried to run, but Luke’s grip was firm and bruising as he stood up. With his other hand, his fingertips tapped against the blood on his face, inspecting it closely. A small chuckle left the blonde, lacking humour and filled with nothing but bad intentions. And little Jack had nowhere to run and no chance to hide now.

“Luke, please don’t do this,” Jack whimpered, trying to pull away from the older boy’s hold on his upper arm.

“Too late,” Luke hissed, his head turning back to the large, ivory house. “DAD! MOM! COME SEE WHAT JACK DID!”

Jack’s blood ran cold. Luke was already a bitter, vile person, but even bad people had to learn their behaviour from somewhere. As for Luke, he had received it from his parents. The only people – other than Luke – Jack feared the most, “Luke, I’m sorry! I’m really sorry!”

But his cries fell on deaf, ignorant ears. Two adults rushed out the house, a man and women in their mid-forties with scowls that seemed to be printed onto their faces. Luke’s parents, the ones who had also adopted Jack.

The woman let out a sharp, horrified gasp, “You! What did you do to my son?!”

“Little bastard attacked me out of nowhere,” Luke threw the child forward, making him fall forward and land on his palms.

Jack barely had any time to gather himself before a rough hand grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt and lifted him up. Luke’s father glared at him, a cigarette hanging up his lips as Jack tried to not breathe any of the smoke being forced down his nostrils. “You think I accept that behaviour in my house?!” He glowered.

“I-I’m sorry sir!” Jack wailed. “But he killed that bunny! He stomped on it till it couldn’t move! I just wanted to protect him!”

“All this over a stupid rabbit?!” The foster mother screeched. “You’re nothing but a little monster! Hurting my boy over a useless rodent!”

Jack’s eyes widened at what she had said. How cold and callous her words were. How she devalued the life of an innocent creature who couldn’t take care of itself. He turned his gaze to Luke, the boy holding a t-shirt his mother fished from the laundry basket and held it to his face. He was still grinning, blood staining his teeth, looking more like the monster that his mother was talking about.

“Get in!” The man growled, dragging the boy into the house again. Jack grunted as his feet scrapped against the ground with the sudden, harsh movement, feeling Luke’s eyes on him as the blonde’s father kept pulling him.

He didn’t stop until the boy was pushed into the kitchen and the door was slammed shut behind him. The man’s grip moved from the back of his shirt to his foreman, nearly cutting off the child’s circulation.

He took the cigarette out of his mouth, “This is what happens to little brats who act out of line.”

Jack gasped, the realisation of why they went inside finally setting in. His foster father didn’t want to risk any prying eyes, any witnesses to see what he was about to do next.

Jack struggled, trying to escape, but the man struck him across the face, his ring leaving a mark in the child’s delicate skin.

The cigarette moved closer to his arm, the young boy crying and writhing. The blunt hadn’t even touched him yet somehow he could already feel it.

The flaming end met his skin.

And Jack’s scream echoed throughout the empty house.

(2)

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Jax gasped, sitting up straight in his bed as he clutched his hand to his chest. He scanned the surroundings, even putting a hand to his forearm to feel for any scarring. His breathing slowed, relief settling when he saw that he was in his own room, and that there were no scars to be found. Just an armful of purple fur instead.

He felt a body stir next to him, Pomni had the blankets tucked around her like a cocoon. Jax didn’t mind, he got too warm most nights anyway. He settled back down, sliding and arm round her waist and pulled her close. He felt her chest against his, rising and falling with each breath. He matched his own with hers, letting it calm his racing heart. His eyes began to droop when he heard a small voice.

“Did you have a nightmare?” Pomni asked, peering up at him with sleepy eyes.

Jax sighed, he promised not to lie to her and he wasn’t going back on it now or ever, “Yeah, I did.”

“Are you okay? You wanna talk about it?” She attempted to sit up. He patted his hand against her waist, reassuring her that she was fine where she was.

“It was about my old foster family,” he told her. “Way before I met Winter.”

“Oh, babe,” she tucked her head under his chin, snuggling close. “You didn’t deserve anything that they put you through. I’m so sorry that you had to relive that in your head.”

“There’s nothing you gotta apologise for,” Jax kissed the top of her forehead. “Honestly, I don’t think about them a lot anymore. I know that sounds ironic cause of Luke confronting me back then. But they don’t mean anything to me, they don’t matter…but you do, more than anything.

He felt her lips smile against his chest, pressing a small kiss next to his heart, “You mean more than anything to me too.”

Jax pulled her closer again, feeling his eyes fluttering shut as sleep came for him once again, “Thanks little lady.”

“I am not a little lady,” she mumbled causing him to chuckle, his voice vibrating against her ear.

The nightmare was at the back of his mind, his eyes gazing on the small jester curled up beside him. Luke didn’t matter anymore, his old foster family didn’t matter anymore. Thinking of them never did anything good for him, there was no need to focus on his past when his future was right next to him. He would talk about them if the situation occurred, he didn’t want to repeat the mistakes of secrets, but Pomni was all that mattered. And that was okay.

With one last sigh, he pressed a kiss to her forehead, joining her in a peaceful, blissful sleep. His dreams for the rest of the night were filled with the smiles of a certain brunette.

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Another day, another adventure. Everyone already had the same shared opinion of Caine’s adventures, but one of the worst things they all agreed on had to be mentally preparing themselves for whatever it was going to be. It was a process that had each one of them dreading for whatever Caine had created for them. Sometimes they were the most thrilling and exciting experiences they ever had, others were boring and had them wanting to go back to their quarters, but the worst ones had to be when they were left emotionally or physically scarred with the most haunting imagery that would be stuck in their minds forever. They never understood why Caine would create such adventures like those, how could he ever think they were fun?

Jax shuddered, hoping for at least a boring adventure instead of the awful third option. He turned to Pomni – who was busy talking to Ragatha – he definitely didn’t want her dealing with that type of adventure. She had already been through enough as it is. He knew that they were to keep a low profile, but he also knew that Caine was unpredictable. Whatever adventure was chosen, he was going to stick as close to Pomni as he could. The last time they were separated she nearly…

“Good morning my superstars!” Caine beamed, a juxtaposition to the circus members sleepy and dreary attitude. “Don’t I have just the perfect adventure for all of you today!”

“Wow, such a surprise,” Jax grumbled under his breath. The jingle of Pomni’s giggle at his sentence made him smile, making sure it was hidden from Caine.

The pair of dentures didn’t seem to notice, simply continuing with his speech, “I know you all miss your old lives as boring humans, so being the gracious ringmaster that I am, I decided to base our new adventure around one of your earthly activities I heard one of you mumble about – though I can’t seem to remember who said it.”

Everyone gawked at that. Caine so rarely laid any notice or curiosity to what the outside world was like, stuck in a firm belief that the circus was the greatest place to ever reside in. This was the first time that he mentioned basing an activity on the real world, what could he even imagine what said activity involved? But more importantly, what activity did he pick?

“I’ve done the amount of research that I felt bothered to do and created this!” With a snap of his fingers, there was a flash of light and the walls of the tent disappeared. Each member blinked, rubbing their eyes from the sudden bright light. When the brightness faded, they let out a small gasp at the scene around them.

An orange sunset, tall and long hedges and miles upon miles of fresh golden corn. Caine had created a cornfield maze. Other than the vegetable, Jax felt a tingling familiarity at the sight of the maze, the memories of falling asleep with a certain jester and dreaming about his best memories of his past in a place just like this. He looked to Pomni, she seemed to be having the same familiar feeling too. She turned her head to him, her eyes twinkling and her smile sweet. He returned it with the same warmth.

“Your goal is simple!” Caine interrupted the couple’s train of thought. “It will be a race between each one of you! Whoever collects the most corn by the end of the adventure wins…oh I actually haven’t thought about that. Um, what do humans usually win at these things?”

“Oh, well it ranges from a lot of different things,” Ragatha piped up. “It could range from prize ribbons, stuffed toys, sometimes even food. Something that most people can enjoy!”

Caine hummed, tapping a finger against the bottom of his jaw, as though he were deep in thought about a life changing matter rather than a prize for a silly game, “Aha! I’ve got it! The prize can be…water! Everyone likes water! Right?”

Ragatha cringed, not surprised in the slightest from his answer, “Sure Caine.”

“Well then, I’ll you all to get started superstars!” the ringmaster grinned, about to snap his fingers. “Oh I should mention, you’re all going to be separated until all of you have found an exit! Okay, bye!”

“Wait, what?!” Pomni paled, but her question was cut short but the familiar snap of Caine’s fingers.

Jax whipped round, his heart pounding. No, no, no! He promised her he would stay! He promised to protect her! He let his feet run as fast as they would take him, not letting the red and blue woman leave his sight for a moment. But she was quickly replaced by green, towering hedges covered with the yellow vegetable he had to collect.

Jax begin to pant heavily, panic filling him from head to toe. Would she be alright? They hadn’t left each other’s sides ever since they got their memories back, too afraid to let go as if they were afraid this were only another hope filled dream. Was she alright being on her own? What is something happened to her?

He took a breath, smoothing his hands over his ears until they sprung back up, picking up the basket placed next to him. Curse Caine and his sudden stupid rules. It didn’t matter, all he had to do was pick a few pieces of corn and find an exit. Maybe he would run into Pomni as well? Yeah, that’s what he had to focus on. Finding Pomni.

He plucked a piece of the edge, placing it inside the brown woven basket before walking down the path. He would find Pomni…

He will find Pomni.

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Knock, knock

“Come in!” a woman’s voice called through the door.

Riley’s wrapped her hand around the knob of the captain’s office door, with it creaking as it slowly swung open. A slender woman with warm, dark skin and brown locs sat at a table, reading through the files on her desk. Ever since Penny and Jack’s disappearance, it had thrown their entire case for a loop. But that was part of the reason why Riley was here.

“How can I help you Agent Reed?” she asked, looking up briefly before returning her attention to the papers.

“Good afternoon ma’am,” Riley stood straight, hands clasped together in front of her. The perfect picture of professionalism. “I’ve just come to receive a warrant to do a search.”

“State the place and case Reed, and I’ll see what I can do,” Rae nodded, sifting through the dozens of notes.

Riley bit her lip, praying this would work, “C&A industries ma’am, for the Penny Reed and Jack Bloom cases.”

Rae paused, the silence was somehow more deafening than Riley ever imagined it could be. The captain placed the papers down, looking back up at red-haired woman, “Weren’t you there a while ago for your case? Something about seeing if a possible witness was involved somehow?”

“Yes ma’am,” Riley nodded. “And I believe that he might be right. Which is why I’m requesting the warrant.”

“It’s also funny that you mention the case for your sister and Mr Bloom,” said Rae.

Riley raised a brow, “What do you mean?”

“We just received word this morning that the files for the missing persons cases that were related to C&A went missing. I was about to make an announcement but as you can see, because of the recent incidents I’ve become more swamped with paperwork that usual,” Rae sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Riley cringed, “It’s really become that bad?”

“Since Jack Bloom was connected to C&A, it’s opened a whole pipeline,” Rae told her. “Apparently, the company is extremely defensive with being accused of these sorts of things, and it’s not the first time someone disappeared on their property on in relation to them. However we haven’t found any proof that they were involved, so we’re still stuck in limbo until we find something to shut them down.”

“That’s why I’m asking for this warrant ma’am. There might be a chance that C&A have these files,” Riley explained. “Some of the cases had this company involved before, right? Not all, but some? Maybe this could be a good chance to see how they were connected to C&A?”

“You sure you got the right plan for this, Reed?” Rae questioned, raising a brow. Her tone was stern but not demeaning in the slightest. “C&A have a pretty tight record. One slip from us and they’ve got lawyers, attorneys, everything coming after us.”

“As long as we have the warrant, we have the right to say we’re allowed to be there,” Riley said. “I’m not going into this blind ma’am, I’ve got a plan and I know what I’m doing.”

“It’s not that I doubt you Riley, but I do know that this case is personal to you. Since it’s your sister going missing as well,” Rae took note of how the redhead tried not to stiffen up at the mention of her sister. “I just don’t want you going into this with wool over your eyes. I’ve been seeing how you and Winter come into work sometimes. Both of you would never stop grinning and smiling at one another, now it looks like you two have become strangers. I don’t want these cases getting to you to the point where you feel like you’re losing yourselves.”

Riley crossed her arms over her chest, gazing down to the floor as though she were a child being scolded. Every time she saw Winter’s face - downed and saddened from the past few months - she wanted nothing more than to kiss every inch of it. She knew Winter wasn’t ignorant to her attempts to avoid anything that attached Penny’s name to it, like retracting a hand from touching a burning flame. But she saw how it was affecting Winter. She knew that she was only trying to help, yet Riley kept turning away, kept refusing any conversation about how she was feeling. It was making things worse, she knew that. Yet the fear of watching Winter tear herself apart from grief and pain had imprinted itself on her mind, and she just couldn’t muster the courage to try and talk to her wife.

One day Riley promised herself, one day I’ll say something. Just…not now.

“Everything is fine ma’am,” she reassured Rae. “These cases are stressful, but not impossible.”

Rae hummed under her breath, fiddling with her ring finger before saying, “Okay, I’ll send to you later today. You better know what you’re doing.”

Riley grinned, a sigh of relief escaping her, “I do ma’am.”

She gave a quick nod to her superior, turning on her heel and grabbed the door handle before Rae called her one last time, “Riley.” The redhead faced her boss again. “I’m serious, be careful with this. C&A aren’t to be taken lightly.”

The captain’s voice was stoic, serious, holding deep truth that Riley was slightly nervous to ask about. But she knew that Rae was right, they had to be careful with this. “I will ma’am.”

With that, she walked out the office, straightening her blazer. She whipped her phone out of her pocket, typing quickly once it was in her hands.

I got the warrant Samual

Be ready

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Riley had told her to wait, just until things were set in stone. But Amber had never felt so restless in her life. Here she was, waiting in her living room by her old computer, with both of her daughters out of reach. Was this really what was expected of her to do? Nothing? For god’s sake! Penny was trapped inside a literal video game and she was supposed to wait?! How could any mother simply do that without complaint?!

Amber groaned, burying her face in her hands before standing and walking to the kitchen. She at least had to do something to keep her mind busy, maybe some tea would help. After all, if she had anymore coffee she was sure she would only get more agitated. She opened the cupboards, her eyes roaming each corner before landing on a familiar yellow box. She reached her hand in to fish it out, sighing with slight melancholy when she saw what type of tea it was.

Chamomile, Penny’s favourite.

Penny who completed half of Amber’s heart with Riley. Penny who wanted others to see the best in themselves when they weren’t able to do so. Penny who had gone through hardship after hardship only to end up in a place that forced her away from her family and into a state of terror.

No. Amber wasn’t going to stand by. She slammed the box onto the counter and marched out the kitchen and up the stairs into the hallway. She could figure out a way to help, even if it was just a little bit. When she made it up the stairs, she reached up to a little strong connected to a trapdoor on her roof, pulling on it carefully as a ladder slid down.

Amber couldn’t remember the last time she had been up the attic, it had seemed it had been decades ago since she stored the last childhood memory of the girls up here. But it held what she needed with the plan in her head. She climbed up the ladder, poking her head up through the trapdoor as coughed from the leftover dust from the wooden floorboards. It had definitely been a while since she had been up here. She lifted herself up inside, taking out her phone to turn on her flashlight. Despite the length of time, she knew where everything was placed and kept in here. Time to get to work.

In a few minutes, Amber had packed a box full of long-lost belongings way back from her time, hopefully it was what she needed as she climbed down the ladder and shut the trapdoor. She made her way back downstairs, placing the box on the coffee table once she was in the living room. She placed her hands on her hips, where would she start? She peered down at the box, filled to the brim with gadgets, old software and objects that she and the girls used to use in a time where technology wasn’t so advanced. She picked up a walkie talkie and a string of fairy lights, perhaps she could start with that. Amber had a long way to go, but still, at least she wasn’t waiting anymore.

She just hoped that this would work a little bit, as long as it helped bring Penny home.

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.

Pomni sighed as she picked up another piece of corn, placing it in her basket. She did panic when she was separated from her fiancé and the others, but so far the adventure didn’t seem to be too hectic. Just a peaceful stroll in the fields while picking corn. She smiled, breathing in the fresh air – as fresh as simulated air could be at least. Doing this reminded her of similar activities she, her mother and sister used to do when they were younger. To get away from work, school, chaos, her father. To just have a day where they could focus on making happy memories. Well, it worked.

It almost felt normal, but…she wished this was something she was doing with Riley and her mother. Riley would lift her onto her back for a ride, despite her younger sister’s protests of not being a child anymore yet would still cling to her like a koala. Amber would be pestering the girls in a way to make them smile, perhaps picking up one of the pieces of corn and waving it like a sword as she chased her daughters.

Pomni gripped the handle of her basket, a shaky breath leaving her lips. She missed them so, so much. She just wanted to go home. She wanted to feel the waft of the warm oaky smell that hit her every time she entered her mother’s home. She wanted to be squeezed in one of Riley’s protective hugs. She wanted to explore every area of her childhood home, to make sure that each place was burned into her mind so she would never forget it ever again. “I miss you guys,” she whispered under her breath, despite the isolation of where she stood.

She shook her head, she had to get a grip. Right now she had to focus on completing this adventure so she could get back to Jax and figure out the next step of their plans. Just as she was about to reach for another piece of the vegetable, a small blue butterfly fluttered out from the leaves and stems. Pomni let out a yelp at the sudden appearance, tripping and falling back, the corn spilling out of the basket as it toppled to the ground. She kicked her feet, backing away from the bug – the last time she was near a butterfly she nearly…

She started to tremble at the memory, internally scolding herself for getting frightened by a single insect. But the feeling of the cold water forcing her down, down, down – burning her lungs as the simulated feeling of being unable to breathe wouldn’t leave her brain. Her chest started to heave with each panicked pant as the butterfly inched closer, fearing that it would glitch if it touched her again and send her into another spiral.

It got closer, she shut her eyes, bracing for that painful static when-

“Don’t be afraid.”

Her eyes snapped open, scanning the area. She swore she heard a voice, like it belonged to an older woman. But it was just her and the butterfly.

“It’s not going to hurt you dear,”

There it was again, “Who’s there?!”

“Just someone who wants to help.”

Pomni scoffed, disbelief curling her lips into strained smile, “How can I trust you if I can’t even see you?”

“I’m sorry. I wish you could, but the rules of this game won’t allow you to see my face. Not anymore.”

The jester raised a brow. Here was a voice, a voice so different, so foreign and unlike anything she had ever heard in the circus before. But for some reason, it didn’t seem bad to trust it. Despite it not actually being her, the voice reminded her of the soft tone her mother used to use to comfort her.

Pomni gulped, looking at the butterfly again. It was simply floating there, no threat lingering in the slightest. Maybe, just maybe. She lifted her hand, her face cringing as she turned away, shoulders stiffening in case that glitch did happen. The tiny feet of the bug landed on her finger. Nothing. No pain, no glitch, just the butterfly resting there as it waited for the jester to make her next move.

She opened her eyes, she was okay. She looked up, trying to detect where that voice came from, “Thank you.” It felt silly, sitting in the dirt as she called out for someone she couldn’t see, but sillier things have happened in this circus. She looked back at the butterfly, letting it crawl across her hand, “Sorry for getting scared earlier. You seem like a friendly guy. I’m sure Kinger would like you.”

The butterfly seemed nice, and it was gentle, but why did the one from before glitch? And why was there a voice this time telling her not to be afraid? With each passing day since she got her memories back, more questions kept opening up. She stood up, picking up her basket and placing the small bug inside, “Guess we’ll need to figure you out later. Hope you don’t mind the corn, I don’t want Caine finding you just in case anything happens.”

The butterfly didn’t seem to mind, already laying down on top one of the vegetables like it was a bed. Pomni smiled, lowering the lid and continued her trail. Now this was definitely going to be an interesting story to tell Jax. She just hoped he was okay.

.

.

.

Jax grumbled as he hit another dead end. He had given up picking up corn a long while ago, settling for trying to find Pomni instead. But each path he took only seemed to lead him down the wrong way, as though the map of this adventure was mocking him. He gripped his ears, pulling slightly. “Easy adventure my @ss Caine,” he muttered under his breath. This was just getting tedious now.

He heard a rustle behind him, making him jump like the type of animal his avatar was. Perhaps it was one of the others? Or maybe Caine added a last-minute boss to try and make things more interesting – yet harder for them. But no, instead it was…him?

At least it looked like him, but much younger. He looked about he was no older than three, his hair shorter while wearing soft clothing stamped in little train patterns. What was going on.

“Come on sweetie!”

A new voice rung out. He looked up, a young couple came up behind the boy, reaching out their hands to him. “We have to start the maze!” the woman said, smiling at the child.

“Okay mama!” the young boy giggled, clutching his hand into hers as the wandered further into the maze.

Jax blinked, his feet trailing behind the trio. He felt like a dog on a leash going after them. Who were these people, why didn’t he remember this? Were they his…his parents? But they couldn’t be possible, his parents left him in social services ever since he was, well, the age the younger version of him here was. But then again, his earliest memory was him in a car going to his very first foster home, nothing before that.

Maybe, just maybe. They weren’t like anything like he pictured them to be, they seemed nice to younger him. Perhaps something else happened, perhaps he really used to be loved.

And so, he followed them. Tracing their lefts and rights, wherever they would go. They seemed like good people, laughing at their little boy’s antics and playing along with whatever imaginary game he came up with. He even felt himself smiling, a tear even escaping his eye at the long-lost image of the family in front of him.

Eventually they stopped, the couple sharing a look before starting down the young boy. Jax froze, what was going on? There was another rustle, a small rabbit jumping out of the stems of corn as it ran down the path. “Honey look!” the mother pointed with a grin. “What’s that?!”

“A bunny!” the little boy replied with excitement, jumping up and down on the spot. Jax’s stomach began to churn.

“It wants you to play tag with it,” the father said. “Don’t leave it waiting.”

“Okay!” the boy nodded, taking a few steps but pausing when he saw his parents weren’t following along. “Aren’t you playing as well?”

“We’ll meet you at the end of the maze,” his mother said, her tone loving despite the dread of this situation building more and more. “You’re a big boy now, I’m sure you can do it on your own.”

“Oh yeah, I can!” the young Jack looked so happy saying that, so unknowing of the true danger he was put in. “I’ll see you soon! Come back little bunny!”

He ran off, chasing the small rodent down the path. Jax shook his head, this couldn’t be happening. Why would they let a kid go off on his own?! What were they thinking. As the boy wandered further down the path, the smiles on the parents faces dropped, grief and tearful fear replacing it instead. The man placed a hand on the woman’s shoulder, rubbing it reassuringly to try and rid some of the guilt that was possibly building inside her.

She nodded to him, taking a deep breath before turning on her heel and walked away in the opposite direction of her son, her husband doing the same. Jax’s heart plummeted, “No, wait!” He cried out, but it only fell on the deaf ears of a forgotten memory. “Don’t do this! Come back!”

He turned in the other direction, that younger version of him was on his own, going after the rabbit in a wild goose chase, to never see his parents again. He chased after him, there was no way this could be true, there was no way.

He saw the boy in front of him, his small form contrasting again the setting sun in the distance. Though this time he wasn’t chasing a rabbit anymore. “Mama! Papa! Where are you!” he wailed, rubbing away tears on his chubby cheeks. “I wanna go home!”

Jax began to shake his head in disbelief, this couldn’t have happened. His parents, they really…left him.

His eyes darted back to where the boy was, but he was gone too, leaving him alone in the field. No parents, no younger him nothing. He was completely and utterly isolated. The rabbit from earlier suddenly jumped out in front of him again, making eye contact with the taller avatar. His nose twitched as the two maintained eye contact, Jax’s eyes blurring with panicked tears.

The rabbit tore off again, leaving him stunned in place, “W-wait! Where are you going!” He chased after it again, just like how his younger self did. “Why are you doing this?! What’s going on?!”

The rabbit didn’t make a noise, it only kept running. Jax did the same, his lungs burning and mind spinning with more questions building as tears streamed down his cheeks. Why was he remembering this now?! How did he even get these memories?! Why him?! Why was this happening to him?!

Why did his parents leave him behind?! Did they just not love him enough to keep him?! But they were crying! They had to have loved him, right? Otherwise they wouldn’t have done that! Or maybe they just couldn’t have them in their lives. He didn’t have a place with them, in the world outside or this world in this game. He was pathetic, useless, he deserved all the bad things that happened to him. HE DESERVED EVERY PAINFUL THING THAT CAME HIS WAY-

“GET OUT OF MY HEAD!” he screamed, his fingers pulling on the fur on his scalp.

He skidded to a halt, gawking at what was in front of him. His old foster house, where he grew up. It was tattered and broken, the complete opposite to how it looked way back when in appearance, but remained exactly the same with how it made him feel. He sniffed, his hands clutching at his chest as his heart squeezed painfully. There was a reason he was here, wasn’t it? To finally get his comeuppance for every bad deed he caused in his life. For how he acted to others in his past life, to how he treated the others in the circus, and how he hurt Penny.

The house creaked along with the stinging wind that made Jax shiver, as though it were whispering him to go inside. He should go inside.  He lifted his foot, about to take another step-

“Jax!”

He stopped, turning back. Pomni’s voice rung out to him in the distance, “Jax! Where are you?!”

She was looking for him.

She cared about him.

She loved him.

Jax smiled, rubbing away the access tears that stained his cheeks. Maybe there was a reason for him to hurt like this, but there was also a reason to keep fighting. Pomni. He looked back to the house, the churning feeling ebbing away slowly though not fully disappearing. Perhaps forgotten things were meant to be forgotten.

He turned on his heel, running back into the maze. He had a jester to find.

The house abandoned once and for all.

.

.

.

“I’ll say it before and I’ll say it again,” said Samual. “This feels just like a movie.”

Riley rolled her eyes as the car pulled up to a corner near the building of C&A. She was fully aware of the déjà vu she was getting, but this time she had the proof in front of her and a case to fulfil. “You go in first and go to the room where the files are. Wait for five minutes then text me to come in,” she instructed to the boy. “If we’re gonna do this, we need to make sure that Jason doesn’t get suspicious.”

“He might be already,” Samual admitted. “After I brought you here, he’s been acting kinda funny.”

“Well we’ll just have to be as careful as we can,” Riley said. “Just do what I told you and come to me if anything happens, I’ve got your back.”

Samual exhaled, mentally preparing himself as he stared at the building ahead of him, “Alright, here goes nothing.”

He climbed out the car, making his way over and inside the tall building. Riley waited until her phone pinged before jumping out herself and making her way over. She did the usual routine of what she would do whenever she got a warrant - go in, check in with the receptionist and have free reign of her search. She took a mental note of how uneasy the receptionist looked when she saw the agent again, Samual was right about Jason being at edge since her last visit. His glass house didn’t seem to be as stable as he wanted it to be anymore.

She made her way to the elevator, checking her phone to see where Samual said he would be waiting for her as the doors shut behind her. As the elevator creaked and shifted as it lifted up, the looming hidden threat of this place started to dawn on the redhead. This company had possibly managed to cover up the disappearances of so many people for nine years, including its own CEO and his wife. And now Penny and Jack were in the belly of the beast as well.

She understood why Rae was so worried with messing up, one mistake could quite literally cost someone their life. Hers, Samual’s, her mother’s, anyone. She had to be careful. The elevator dinged, opening their doors as she stood out and saw Samual at an open door down the hall, signaling for her to come towards him.

Riley nodded, remaining as casual as possible until she reached the room and Samual shutting the door behind her. “Alright, where do we start?” Riley asked, clasping her hands together.

“It should be on this computer,” Samual told her. “Jason doesn’t like keeping stuff like that on his own computer in case he gets caught.”

“So he’d rather have someone else take the fall, how chivalrous,” Riley muttered sarcastically.

“Tell me about it,” Samual muttered. Riley looked over at him with amusement, this was the first time she actually heard him have a bit of an attitude. He sat down, cracking his fingers and rolling his neck as he logged onto the computer. “Okay, I can do this.” He pulled a bag onto his lap, the C&A logo on top as he pulled out a USB. “I snuck into his office the other day. And before you get on at me for doing it before getting the warrant, Jason was gone for the day and it was the only time in the security guards schedule where they weren’t watching his office the whole time.”

“Holy shit kid,” Riley laughed. She should be mad, really she should. But goddamn she couldn’t help but be impressed. “You have guts. So, where exactly are these files in the USB’s?”

“These USB’s have old games codes,” Samual replied. “Sometimes if we have any unfinished demos, we store information in them to make sure other competition don’t try and steal it, to put it in a place where no one would think to find.”

“And if the case files in the USBs, then Jason can carry them around wherever he wants,” Riley finished.

“Yup,” Samual sighed. “Okay, I think I know what to do here.”

In just little time, the kid had managed to open a whole different part on the USB, old coding and files appearing and scattering over the screen. Riley felt as though she had to take a step back from how intense it seemed, but Samual was unfazed a focused, still clicking and typing as though this were as simple as clicking a browser away.

“I got it,” Samual spoke up eventually, turning to Riley and holding his hand out. “You got the other one?”

“Uh, yeah,” Riley reached into her pocket, taking out another USB and placing it into Samual’s hands.

“If we take everything off this, Jason’s gonna get more suspicious,” Samual told her. “I can make copies for you to take back and from there we’ll try and figure a way to get it loaded into the game back at your mom’s place.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Riley agreed, watching him work as she glanced at the door every so often.

It felt as though hours went by, but eventually, Samual had done it. The files were copied and put into the other USB. They had done it. “We got it!” he exclaimed, a small cheer in the back of his tone.

“Looks like it,” Riley grinned, putting the USB back in her pocket. “I gotta get going, before your boss finds out what’s-”

The door slammed open, another feeling of déjà vu and piercing cold fear shooting down Riley and Samual’s backs. “What are you doing back here?!” Jason growled.

Riley sneered at him, crossing her arms as she stood in front of Samual. She wasn’t going to make the same mistake twice, “I have a warrant to check this place out since the files for our cases went missing. And since your name is the main one on Jack Bloom’s case, that means I have to search the place. AKA, doing my job.”

“What gives you the right to speak to me that way,? Jason sneered.

Riley scoffed, “Other than the fact that I’m trying to find people I care about, you don’t get to speak to me that way either.”

“Oh really?” Jason raised a brow. “I’m sure your boss will disagree.”

He stepped aside, revealing the disappointed face of Captain Rae, almost looking tired as she stepped into the room. Riley paled when another face appeared in the door – Winter. “Winter, Captain Rae, what’s going on?” Riley asked.

“We got a call from Mr Wood that you came here under the guise of a warrant to steal game codes for their rival companies,” Captain Rae sighed. “And since I’m your boss, I had to be taken away from work to make sure my agents aren’t fucking up.”

“Excuse me?!” Riley’s eyes widened, appalled as she started at the man beside her boss, who seemed to be getting smugger when Winter spoke up.

“One of the employees here managed to find Samual taking out property from Mr Wood’s office before calling you,” Winter told her. “They were concerned that you were using the cases in order to make C&A look bad.”

“That’s bullshit!” Riley snapped. “My sister is involved in these cases, do you really think I would risk her safety over fucking game codes?!” Riley was treading on dangerous waters, and she knew it. But no one messed with her sister, especially not some big shot who believed he could get away with this.

“And what exactly is in that computer over there?” Jason pointed out, his tone slightly mocking. Riley’s face fell as she glanced towards the monitor. While she was glad that he didn’t know about the spare USB, she knew that this looked really bad.

Samual stepped forward, “It was my idea!”

Everyone turned to him, even Jason – his face darkening.

Samual gulped as he continued, “I wanted to help Miss Riley with the case and decided to do some unethical routes in order to help her. You can even check the USB, the game codes are still there.”

Jason hummed, pushing past Riley as he, Rae and the others made their way to the computer. Riley nearly sighed with relief when the appearance of the game codes was still there. To the others, it looked like normal files that you expected to find at this company. But to Jason, it meant that his secret was still safe. He straightened his back as he turned back to the others, a faux grin on his face, “It seems that I was mistaken. I do apologize for wasting your time Captain Rae. I just wanted this whole mess taken care of, we wouldn’t want to go to court over this after all.”

“No, we wouldn’t,” Rae retorted in a monotone voice. “We’ll be on our way, thank you for your apology Mr Wood.”

The four walked out the room, Jason’s stare burning on their backs as the door was shut behind him. Rae halted, spinning back round as she went face to face with Riley, “I told you not to be stupid!”

“I wasn’t ma’am,” Riley froze, immediately reverting back to the professional position she was back when she was asking for the warrant. “I did as you told me to. Search with the warrant and try to find out what was going on. I didn’t know he was gonna pull that shit.”

“This isn’t a game Riley, Jason Wood can and will do anything he can in order to keep himself and C&A at the top!” Rae hissed. She stepped back, rubbing her temples to dispel the approaching headache. “Did you at least find anything?”

Riley opened her, mouth about to reveal what she found when clarity struck her. How exactly could she explain this without sounding crazy? She almost didn’t believe Samual when he told her about this, so how could she explain this to her captain? And the files still looked the same as they did from the computer, no other person would be able to tell the difference about how they looked unless they had the tech knowledge that Samual did. All it would show was exactly what Jason had tried to frame her about, “No, I’m sorry.”

Rae exhaled sharply, “Next time you’re gonna be reckless, think twice before landing yourself in hot water, Reed.”

Riley lowered her head to the ground, “Yes ma’am.”

Rae sighed turning back on her heel and walked away.

Winter came up behind her wife, sharing the same scowl as their boss, “We’re talking about this when we get home.” She didn’t let Riley say a word, already walking away and towards the elevator.

Riley rubbed her eyes, this was not how she wanted her day to end. Samual came up, fiddling with his ring finger awkwardly, “I’m really sorry Miss Riley.”

“It’s fine kid,” she mumbled. “You just get home and call me if you need me.”

Samual nodded, not wanting to prod any further as he walked away as well.

Riley just wanted to fade into nothing there and then. What type of hell was she getting herself into?

.

.

.

Winter tapped her foot as she waited in the living room, dressed in a pyjama tank top and shorts with her hair tied into an uneven ponytail. Riley was half an hour late. She already had a habit of obviously avoiding a situation, but this was out in the open with how hard she was trying now. Winter groaned, picking up the bottle of wine of the coffee table in front of her and poured it into a glass, she didn’t want to be sober dealing with this.

She let the liquid run down her throat, relieving some of the stress when she heard the door open. Finally.

Riley shut the door behind her, setting down her bag when she noticed Winter eyeing her down, “Where’s Percy?”

“Asleep,” Winter retorted, setting down the glass. “We need to talk.”

“Listen, I know how that looked back there,” Riley started. “But it wasn’t what you think it was.”

“Really? Riley a CEO of a billion-dollar company almost got you fired!” Winter exclaimed, setting down her glass. “What am I supposed to think?!”

“Everything I’ve been doing was to find Penny and Jack,” Riley told her. “And you really think that I would so something like that?”

“Of course not, but you’ve put me in a corner ever since Penny went missing and left me to gather dust!” Winter cried. “Now all of a sudden you’re sneaking into buildings and won’t tell me why, other than to just blindly trust you! Riley that isn’t fair! You have to tell me what’s going on!”

Riley peered behind her, grimacing at the empty wine glass on the table, “Have you been drinking on a work night.”

Winter placed her hands on her hips, refusing to back down, “I only had one glass, you know that’s all I have on work nights. And it won’t be enough for me to be distracted from this conversation.”

“I’m just thinking about Percy, okay?!” Riley groaned. “Sorry that I want to protect our son!”

“Oh please, not everyone is your father Riley,” Winter growled.

The redhead stiffened, her jaw tightening, “Back down, now.”

“No!” Winter shook her head. “You’re hiding something from me and I know it. All I want is to help you, but you act like I’m nothing but an annoyance to you. And now you’re pulling this shit and nobody will tell me why, not even you! You never keep secrets from me.” Winter’s voice broke, clutching the fabric of her tank top on her chest. “You’re hurting so much and it’s killing me seeing you like this. So why?! Why are you hiding things from me? What did I do?! Why are you allowed to protect me but I’m not allowed to do the same for you?!”

Riley wanted nothing more than to cry and bring Winter into her arms. Everything her wife said was true to a fault. She wanted to tell her about Jack, she wanted to tell her all her plans, she wanted to tell her how the grief and fear of Penny disappearing had been eating her alive for the past few months-

Percy’s cry broke her from spiral, alerting the two mothers. Riley sighed, “I’ll get him.”

Winter tried to stop her, “Riley-”

“Winter, please,” Riley’s voice was soft and desperate. “Please. I just want some silence.”

The other woman sniffed, backing away from her wife. Guilt churned in Riley’s stomach as she watched her wife face away, hearing her light sobs. This was for the best, at least she’s safe. With that, she went up the stairs to her crying baby.

Winter curled up on the sofa. Never before had she wished for her brother as she did now.

.

.

.

Jax gasped as the maze disappeared. He was still chasing after Pomni’s voice, but apparently Caine had announced that Gangle was the winner and brought them all back. He nearly fell to his knees when he saw the jester, she was okay.

“Well that adventure was certainly…an adventure!” Caine boomed. “I don’t fully understand your silly human activities, but tomorrow we’ll return to our regular schedule of fun, fun, FUN!”

“Yeah, yeah, great,” Jax said absentmindedly, his eyes still on Pomni as the jester looked at him, relief in her eyes as well.

“Good to hear your positive spirit Jax!” Caine grinned, about to lift his hand and pat him on the back when the rabbit flinched, arms arched over his head to protect himself.

Everyone gaped at that, Jax never flinched. Pomni brought her hands to her mouth, she knew what that meant.

“I, um. Jax, are you alright?” Caine asked, his tone much softer than it usually was.

Jax blinked, everyone was staring at him. He lowered his arms back to his sides, “I’m fine.”

Pomni bit her lip, he was anything but fine.

Even Caine was surprised by the rabbit’s actions, “Uh…right. Anyways I’m gonna…yeah I’ll just go.” The AI floated away, leaving the group in their stunned silence.

Jax ignored them, rushing to Pomni and dropped to the ground, wrapping her tight in his arms. He was shaking like a leaf, whatever he had seen in that corn maze had left its mark on him. She uncurled herself out of his embrace, holding his face in her hands as she lightly stroked his cheek. “Come on,” she held out her hand.

He hesitated for a moment, before his fingers intertwined with hers. She pulled him up, picking up both of their forgotten backets as she led him back to her room. The others were still staring, but she didn’t care. Right now, Jax needed her.

She shut the door behind her, letting him get comfy on her bed as she put the baskets back down and joined him on the red and blue mattress. “What happened?” it was only one question, but he could hear so much behind it. I’m here for you, tell me anything and everything, you’re safe.

“I-I think I saw myself in that maze?” he said. “Well, myself but younger, much younger. And my birth parents were there. I know, its stupid and stuff like this happens sometimes but…why do I remember this now? I thought I was okay with my past. Now seeing them, it only what makes what my foster family did to me even worse.”

Pomni was silent, taking in every part of what he said, “Show me where it hurts?”

He peered up at her, it had been a while since she said that to him. But both of them knew that what she did next helped more than he could imagine. He raised his arm, the same one that his foster father used to burn his cigarettes on. She held it gently in her hands, pressing gentle kisses to the appendage.

Tears trailed down the dried stain on his cheeks, his arm trembling slightly. She was so careful with him, giving him the kindness that the adults who failed him could never give him. “I know this isn’t much,” she mumbled against his fur. “But I love you more than anything. Those people never deserved you. I wish I could erase all the pain they caused you. All I hope than when I do this.” She pressed a kiss to his wrist. “You know that I’ll be with you despite everything.”

His breath staggered for a bit, it was so long since he felt the overwhelming feeling of being genuinely wanted by someone. His hands cupped her cheeks, pulling her closer and pressed her lips to his. The kiss was messy, frantic but neither of them could pull away, they needed each other.

They parted when the need for air was too strong, with Jax holding her close so Pomni could hear his heartbeat. His head was still swarming, spinning. But her simple touch was all he wanted to think about. All that he needed. The bad stuff wouldn’t go away. However for now, this was enough.

“There’s one more thing I need to tell you,” Pomni mumbled.

Jax pushed off her hat, pressing his nose to her hair as he hummed, “And what’s that?”

“Well,” she separated from him again, the rabbit already missing her warmth as she picked up her basket from the maze. Lifting the lid, she picked up the little butterfly as she cupped it in her hands. “I found this little guy during the adventure. But the way I found him? You’re gonna want to sit back for this…have invisible people ever spoke to you in this place before?”

.

.

.

Fairy lights were strung up, an old tape recorder and radio were placed together on the coffee table, and a walkie talkie was held in Amber’s hands. Hooked into the recorder and radio was a large wire leading to the computer. Amber clenched her fists, it was now or never.

She turned on the walkie talkie, “Penny? Are you there?”

[bengiyo]

My School President Ep 12 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

Most of the week I was actually ready to finish this show and begin anticipating its impacts. Now I just know I'm going to miss these losers.

Last week, Chinzhilla lost Hot Wave, and we spent the episode watching them grapple with yet another defeat: this time on the biggest stage yet. They decided to go back to the beach to honor their wishes, and we watched the group tear apart at the seams. Still, Yak came through with some perspective, Tiwson with some food, and Tinn with the final performance for the band at prom. Tinn's mom is aware of his relationship with Gun, but is trying to be a good mom and keep her anxieties to herself and her husband.

Oh right, we're picking up with Tinn's mom asking Tinn directly about Gun.

Not them cutting between both moms! Don't make me compare them!

Fine, let's compare. Tinn and Potjanee have this huge wall between them in their relationship that seems founded entirely on her expectations of Tinn. It's hard for well-behaved children to be open with their parents when they've thrived so long on praise for meeting those expectations. On the other hand, Gun and Gim have struggled and lost a lot together, and so much of their relationship is about Gim not letting Gun give up on his dreams. So, of course Gun can tell his mom about Tinn and it mostly be a formality and yet another excuse for them to hug and reassure each other.

I do feel for Potjanee. Seeing your son scared because you might ask about the person he cares about can't feel good, and there's no obvious way of fixing it at this point. However you've raised him has convinced him that he can't trust you with this. That's actually just so sad.

I get these two agreeing to continue as they are. The reality that some of your families won't accept you is unfortunately a norm for many viewers.

This Canon ad is cute, but anyone on the school network can access this printer???

The boyfriend era is fun.

Tiwson said you will absolutely give him his flowers.

The homophobia creeping at the edges is an unfortunate reminder of my own adolescence. I do like that the show is highlighting that it impacts queer girls too.

Irritated, jealous Gun is so demanding.

A tandem bike! My goodness.

Oh, I like them sliding in cute boyfriend kisses first. That's such a good choice, because they've actually been together for a while.

Phat, we're asking about juniors now??? I've been asking about this for like six episodes!

I really think we as a global society should stop taking pictures and videos of people on the streets and using them as content. What sucks so much about this is that Gun is finally willing to be openly affectionate with Tinn. He decides to kiss his boyfriend on their date, and now someone is going to take that joy from them. It's not like they were hooking up in the park, and yet here we are.

I love Chinzhilla with my whole heart.

Kajorn saying he quits if they're not on the same page, and Gun coming behind to say he already used the same lie Tiwson suggested...but Tinn doesn't want to lie anymore....set to a sad piano version of Let Me Tell You...oof.

Not Gun using Tinn's nose suggestion to keep from crying in the rain.

Best Boy Tinn is not gonna let this pull them apart. Interesting that we just saw Fourth and Gemini hug tightly in Moonlight Chicken. Gemini places arm in a similar way here, too.

I'm installing an EMP on every queer so that we can demolish people's phones when they record us.

Very much enjoying Sound and Win in the finale. I will miss all of Chinzhilla. I hope they appear in the Our Skyy 2 episode.

See, and this is why I never turned on Potjanee. I know some of y'all feel some kinda way about her, but here we are. These boys have not even been out for 24 hours and the shit is already piling. She asks, "Why aren't other people as kind as the characters in the series we watched?" Good question, ma'am. Our lives are not fictional, and we face the horrors daily. It's the dad saying, "We can't force other people, honey. It's down to us whether we're as kind to our son as those in the series." I see they learned Uncle Tong's lesson. Now go stand beside your son.

Not Tinn whispering the name order thing to Gun and Gun immediately asserting that his name is first!!

Having adults you trust being casually homophobic is so damaging.

Gemini has a fantastic eye roll. We saw it on episode 5 of Moonlight Chicken, too.

KAJORN!!!! COME THROUGH, BABY BOY! HIT AGAIN! HIT HIM FOR ME, TOO!!

What did I say?? Don't you ever lay hands on someone else's child! I SEE YOU, POTJANEE! YOU ARE INVITED TO BRUNCH!!

And this is how you make it right with your son. You show him he can trust you by standing in front of those who would make him feel lesser.

Okay, I like the outfits Chinzhilla picked!

They're playing You Got Ma Back. 😭 I love them so much.

Now they're doing Come Closer! I do love Ford's voice.

Oh I love Rock & Star as a song from Gun to Tinn.

I love getting Tinn back on stage again.

POTJANEE!!!!

I'm gonna need Gun to stop looking at Tinn's lips!

I'm so glad Gun got into a program he wanted. I can't take any more losses for this boy.

And here I was living in a world without Texas Chicken ads.

Oh, Sound and Win. I'm going to miss your dynamic. Look at Winny and Satang giving two solid kisses.

Poor Phat. Yo dropped him so fast.

Tinn and Gun are so cheesy. I love them.

Not me crying over Chinzhilla again!

I like the notes for their juniors and not showing any actors. It would lead to the wrong kind of speculation, and this lets GMMTV pick up this setting again any way they want.

Not @respectthepetty getting into my head about Gun's blue socks and Tinn's red shirt when he formally meets Tinn's parents.

I love Tinn's dad. He's embarrassing in only the way a loving father could be. He's also constantly rooting for Tinn.

We get 'eating' jokes and a sweet kiss in bed to close out the series. I'm good.

And they verse? We love to see it.

Wow. Just amazing. I loved this show.

Final Verdict: 10, Highly Recommended. I've been in queer media since I was a teen almost 20 years ago. I have experienced a lot of wins and losses as a viewer of BL. In so many ways this show healed any gripes I had with early productions like Lovesick, Make It Right, etc. This show is damn-near perfect. It's so heartwarming. I loved all of this. It's a show about a bunch of losers trying to help each other, and there's nothing more beautiful than that. We now have my new default recommendation for people curious about BL after coming off something sweet in the West.

[shinakazami1]

Give me a 12, 13 and 22 for rhys, soldier 🫵

FELLOW RHYS ENJOYER (krotiation I LOVE YOUR ART TOO SM GAAAAH THIS FANDOM HAS SUCH GREAT ARTISTS)

12. What's the funniest or craziest AU idea you've ever come up with?

I have in total, three AUs I have to finally write anything for fhasfsa (I do plan on posting Tales AU first chapter this week tho!!). 1) RHYS AI AU is something you saw me post snippets of - in general, it's an alternative version of Borderlands 2, where Jack kills Lilith and Roland very quickly and survives. Due to mourning for Nisha, Wilhelm and Angel, he one day writes code for a companion based on an imaginary friend he had but also, gives him some trait of each one of those he misses. While Rhys was going to slowly become the silly personality we know and love, this was my typical 'give the character therapy when they don't want it, and end up with them hurting someone else and trying to change'. 2) JUST WING IT AU is my Tales AU that starts with changes in ep 5, with how Rhys handles the news about Jack wanting to get that exoskeleton in him and focusing on exploring Jack's loneliness and adding him as the third character, making sort of second season for the game. The additional driving point would be that Loader Bot would be able to grab Gortys and run off with her, so the search for Vault would become longer Yet the AU I really hope to start exploring in the future, is this one: 3) Loss of what once happened but never before AU. It's a Borderlands 3 Rhack au that would focus on Rhys finding out he is a siren with huge time-travelling powers and the costs that come with it. He would turn back in time, when Jack was still known as John during the nights, and watch some of the consequences happen in the present during the day. He doesn't know though just how strong the butterfly effect will be...

13. What's a character or ship you haven't written/drawn yet but would like to someday?

Characters: Timothy, Angel, Nisha, Zer0, Katagawa, Axton, Moxxi, Lilith, Roland

Ships: Rhysothy, Rhack, JackxNisha, MoxxixTimothy, Rhysagawa, Axton x Turret (cus she is my wife I luv her)

(The list prob isn't finished cus I still have to finish playing the second game and play the third one oifhaiof)

22. Give us headcanons for Rhys

He actually likes fashion and likes casual official style in general.

He has a sweet tooth but pretends to like spicy food in college.

He actually had a heterochromia before the echo eye and decided to keep it.

He admired Jack a bit but he laughed at psycho fans, as he has some critical thinking.

Even a few years after getting Atlas running again, he still tries to make some guns himself, even if he doesn't have as much time.

He was the one dumped by his ex girlfriend even if he didn't like their dynamic because he was actually scared nobody else would be into him.

He spends a lot of time in the morning preparing his hair. It's quite wavy which gets visible in wetter climates but fortunately for him, he lives mostly in dry ones.

He met Katagawa and at first, couldn't believe he had a fan even if he had some boosted ego but felt something off about him. He turned off an invitation to Zanara because he still thinks about his talk with Vaughn about being good at faking cool. That's why he is even more awkward in future games, since while chasing the younger years, he wants to show he matured, hoping that maybe that will bring Sasha back. That's also why he got the moustache - to show he is becoming more serious. Which fails miserably.

He seemed the most confident in his new Atlas CEO stage because he had to look like it. There was nobody else to help him at the time, so he tried his best to do what he had done - acted the plan out.

He still imagines his plans the same way he did in Tales - with fantasies.

[silviakundera]

alright my dudes & dudettes, it's Spirealm time!!

(jazz hands ensue)

fair warning: in these episode reactions I'm not gonna pretend I haven't read the novel. in fact, I purposely finished the novel before viewing, to get The Full Experience. thus novel spoilers, including twist end, included.

I'm spacing out posting these, so you aren't flooded.

The Spirealm Ep 1

* ngl I was legit hyped to see the hallway of doors! I am one of Those People who does not visually imagine stories in their mind, so I don't have much of a preconceived idea of what people or places in a book look like. So adaptions are a special delight for me

* ok, so he's playing a "VR game" and logs off.... OR DOES HE????? In the book, the whole narrative we think he's experiencing for the first time all happens within the 12th door - he has his memory suppressed and only thinks he just entered his first door. I am intrigued at the idea that the drama could be playing a lil bit of a slight of hand here... in which he has been a regular player of 'the official version' already and is already under the thrall. Apparently symptoms include hallucinations and death! Good times. No wonder he wants a black market copy for his very own.

* idk it's just a thought

* Mostly what I found suspicious is that he's already showing super hearing ability and he's having to shake off a mental disturbance

* Chestnut!!! Ok in the 12th door in the novel, at first Chestnut wasn't uber lovey dovey with him anymore. 1st indication of weirdness. In the drama... maybe? we see the cat backing away a bit and resisting, and he has to pull Chestnut over... LQ makes a comment, "I'll give you food, don't move" 🤔🤔🤔🤔

* Suddenly the game shows up in his mail? from Unknown Address... on... isn't it the same day? so that makes no logical sense. (intentional subtext or just cdrama time lol? ) and then for a moment it melds into the game world when he's walking outside... this is all supporting my theories!

* k it's BOYFRIEND TIME. Let's find yo man.

* He either now logs onto the official game (or THINKS that he is logging onto the official version for the 1st time, but he's been inside this whole episode)

* He walks through the door, thinks there's a glitch, and now he believes he's logged off. This time he definitely didn't. DEFINITELY.

* This door looks fantastic.

* He's hit by a car while marveling at the door. Except I don't think so, either time A or B he never logged off. Bro is SEEING FANTASTICAL DOORS IN THE STREET. That's not occurring in our reality.

* I'm really appreciating how disorientating the first episode is, by the way. When does reality end? There are like 7 options to start from.

* FINALLY BOYFRIEND \o/

* "I'm saving you and you still scold me." We may have lost Ruan Baijie 😭😭😭 but this is a nice meet-cute.

* The explanation from Mysterious Future Boyfriend: To put it simply, you're in the game. Here, if you don't finish the game, you can't leave. If you end the game here, you leave... then it really is the end." [universal sliced neck gesture]

(and ok, still banging on that drum, but this vibes with my pet theory - that he never left in the first place...)

* LQ crossed into the game -- and what that means is said to be complicated.

When LQ says as a programmer he can follow an explanation, Ruan Nanzhu just mocks that he hears but doesn't understand.

* Already we are getting a certain vibe, with LQ being backed up into a tree by looming hot stranger. Bro visibly looks down twice (at hottie's lips? at how close their bodies are becoming? the looming increases intensity)

Very strong 20 minute opener imo.

((Post-script: if we want to consider an alternative to the alternate theory of WTF is Reality in this Drama? What if is there a normal game he test plays in the first 12 minutes & separately also The Doors actually exist the same as they do in novel, and he enters on the verge of death and the drama is never actually about a game at all, & he never leaves the 12th door. He just never escapes, baby. 💥😵💥))

(that one is pretty out there tbh. just added for spice. and that very pretty door looking out of place & wholly different than the game decor.)

Next Episode

[gothicbarbie]

BL'S I'm Watching (August 2023)

In order of my enjoyment!

1. Only Friends - Breath of fresh air! It's messy, it's sexy, it's entertaining... it's got a lot of pairings I love seeing together. I like that it's just a more mature BL. Yes, the high heat is great, but it's about these characters feeling comfortable with their sexuality. I want more!

2. My Personal Weatherman - Always enjoy JBL's and high heat ones are even better because imo they always feel more realistic. The plot of this is a bit strange but the chemistry is great and I want to see where it all goes.

3. Hidden Agenda - Joongdunk are just so adorable. Besides the fact that they are just the most attractive pairing to look at, they have clearly gotten even more comfortable around one another. I like that the plot is going in a different direction than I expected. It's not the most amazing BL I've ever seen but I'm enjoying it.

4. Love Class 2 - I was busy last week so I am behind on episodes but I did enjoy the start of the show. A tad confusing on first watch but it made sense in the rewatch. An interesting plot with 3 different pairings to root for, so it's a fun watch. There are a few elements I don't care for but it's not too bad.

5. Dangerous Romance - A bit of a sketchy start and I can't stand bullies, but I am happy that Chimon and Perth get a chance to shine and I wanted more of them. Let's see where it goes.

6. Minato's Laundry 2 - Still a great show. Lots of cute moments. I think season 1 was better and Minato is irritating me quite a bit with his insecurities and pulling away. It doesn't make a lot of sense to me personally but I still like the show and will finish it out.

7. Stay By My Side - Not Taiwan's best, and the main pairing is a bit awkward in their kissing imo but I still the show is very fun and they are cute.

8. Laws of Attraction - Interesting-ish plot. A few pairings to root for. There is def. some boring parts and issues I have with the show but I am still liking it.

9. Be Mine Superstar - I find the plot of this one pretty boring TBH but I freaking love JaFirst. It's not their best series and I find Ja's character pretty awkward. But it's watchable.

10. The Wedding Plan - This plot is weird. Don't get the fake marriage or why the main guy can't be honest. I think the chemistry is alright but not overwhelming. I am not fully invested but its a short series and I wanna see how it goes.

11. Jun and Jun - ehhhh idk about this one guys. I can't get into it. I wanted to, but office romances aren't for me, and I think this one is especially boring. I like the chemistry between the main two but I find a lot of their moments a bit uncomfortable and there is a lack of consent in a lot of areas. Not Korea's best.

12. Stay Still- Not even sure what I am watching but its so short so I'm just kinda skimming.

On Hold:

1. I Feel You Linger in the Air

2. Lost in Translation

Tried the pilots of these and they felt very slow so I had to put them on hold for now and may come back to them later or if I hear good things about them.

Recently Finished:

1. Stay With Me - For anyone with doubts, this is definitely a BL. Some sweet kisses (though not on the lips) and lots of flirting and innuendo. A terrible ending but it'll apparently get a season 2, so I'll hold out. I genuinely loved this series!

2. Sing My Crush - Not big on musical plots and I found the storyline here a bit boring and like I'd seen it before, but it was okay. The main couple was very cute. Didn't love it as much as everyone else, but it was still good and worth the watch

EXTRAS:

Advance Bravely - Not currently airing. It's also I think technically a bromance but there are def. suggestive moments and scenes and I find the chemistry really good an entertaining so I'm enjoying it.

Catch Me Baby - Not currently airing. Only watched 1 ep and had to skim it, I found it very weird. I'm only really watching for Net/James.

[venusxsturnio]

✧.* 𝒟𝐸𝒥𝒜 𝒱𝒰 ✧.* - Olivia Rodrigo

EP.2.GOOD 4 U

EP.1.PILOT

PAIRINGღ matt x ex!black!fem!reader!influencer

SUMMARYღmatt and y/n, were the perfect couple. until everything started to go downhill for them. the secrets, the lies, the gaslighting. It became too much for y/n. 8 1/2 months later...here we are.

FROM VENUSღ hey y'all. i just want to thank everyone who read the first part of this series and returned for the second. i hope you guys like this chapter, and it also might be really long because there is some sh!t that's about to go on...✿ (shout out to xduinen for helping me. y'all go follow her. my #1 supporter!) sorry there wasn't a lotta dialogue in the last part, i was just trying to give a general gist of the story anyways let me stop yappin. hope y'all enjoy :)

WARNINGSღ cussing...use of the word babe/baby...featuring Olivia's song(do not own the song. or other characters only mine. only plot.)

kinda proofread...i was kinda lazy today it was a lotta writing...sorry if i messed anything up. :)

REALITY...

POV: 3RD PERSON

9:45 AM

Y/N'S PLACE:

y/n was in her bathroom doing her facial routine for vidcon when she heard a faint sound of her phone ringing. she got up and walked in her room searching for her phone. she lifted up the blanket on her bed to find her phone buzzing. she flipped the phone over to find that her manager, miguel was calling. "Hello?" she answered "I have a job for you today. You're performing at vidcon. Like singing." y/n's face lit up at the thought of her performing at vidcon for all her fans. "OMG! Are you serious.?" y/n asked still in shock.

"Deadly." her manager stated. y/n silently jumped up and down in excitement. "What time do I need to be there?" y/n questioned. "12. But you might want to get there a little earlier being as it can get very hectic. You remember last year." her manager explained, laughing a little at the end. y/n chuckled a little at the thought of last years vidcon, the two hung up as y/n went to her closet to grab some gray gallery dept sweats, a white fitted long-sleeve top, and her white/black/gray retro 4's, along with her gray beanie, keys, purse and her phone as she walked out of her room, downstairs, out the door, and to her car.

10:04 AM

STURNIOLO HOUSE:

the triplets and megan were all getting ready to go to vidcon. they all got dressed and headed down stairs to eat breakfast. "So what creators are gonna be there?" chris said breaking the silence. "I know for sure that my favorite tiktoker is gonna be there. She's like the best. I can't wait for you guys to meet her." megan squealed. nick and chris looked at her in confusion, being they never really liked megan. similar to someone, they really missed y/n.

that's why they still keep in contact with her. "Who is it?" matt asked with a confused expression on his face. "You'll find out when we get there." megan stated. "Uh, guys I think we should get going. We don't wanna get caught up in traffic this time. Remember last year?" chris changed the subject, laughing at the last part. "I agree." nick said. the group finished eating, gathered their things and left.

11:40 AM

ANAHIEM CONVETION CENTER:

y/n was in her dressing room just chillin when she heard a knock at her door. "come in!" y/n yelled. her manager walked in with a rack that had a white dress and some bedazzled heels on it. "ok so this is what you're wearing on stage." miguel stated grabbing the dress and showing her. "thanks, i love it." y/n said admiring her dress. "you're welcome" miguel said as he walked out. y/n smiled to herself. she sat back down and got on her phone.

12:05 PM

a few moments later she got a text on her phone from miguel saying "come on out the ppl are waiting!". y/n grabbed her phone as she walked out of her room. she made it to the door of the building and walked into the big room, with all the booths, and tables, and people. every section she walked by people were screaming and cheering for her. she laughed as she walked over to her section, and everyone started screaming. "OMG HI!." one fan said. "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! CAN I GET A PIC!" another said.

y/n got flustered and she felt her cheeks go hot. she smiled and waved at the fans, as she went to sit down at her booth. even some people from other booths were running over to hers. that's how much people loved her. she started grabbing books, and papers, and started signing them. she even took some pictures. y/n was happy until...

12:10 PM

the triplets walked into the building and to their booth while megan went to grab a chair and sit on the sidelines, since she was kind of irrelevant in this situation. she watched as all the girls piled up all over the triplets. giving them hugs, and fake little kisses on the cheek. some might say she even got jealous. the boys signed some books, and papers as well. they also took pictures, you know the usual. megan was kind of getting tired of it, so she went to go see if her favorite tiktoker was here. she walked around for some time, until she came up on a long, line. she gazed her view from the back of the line to the front. she met eyes with y/n. she smiled and waved, y/n smiled back as megan ran to the line, to wait for her turn.

the guys took a break from taking pictures and went back to signing autographs as matt looked around for megan. "Guys, where's Megan?" matt asked confused. why would she leave without telling him. "Don't know don't care." nick said with a bit of an attitude in his voice. "Same here." chris said with a sarcastic tone. "What the hell is wrong with you guys?" matt asked. he always wondered why the boys would act like that whenever megan was brought up, or she said something. "What do you mean?" nick said, acting clueless as usual. "You know what the hell I mean. Why do you guys act that way towards her?" matt asked started to get irritated. "BECAUSE WE DON'T LIKE HER!" the boys yelled out of frustration. the fans jumped back a little at the tone of voice that was being used.

the triplets went back and forth for a little while longer until matt saw megan running excitedly. "OMG MATT! LOOK I GOT HER SIGNATURE!" megan yelled. before matt could get a good look at the autograph, smoke started shooting out of canons, and everyone looked towards the stage. lots of people started running towards the stage to figure out what was going on. before everyone knew it CoryxKenshin walked out onto the stage.

"What's up everybody. It's ya boy CoryxKenshin and welcome to Vidcon! We have a special guest joining us today. She has over 4.3M followers on tiktok and she just got to 1M subscribers on YouTube. Please welcome our special guest!" Cory exited the stage as 'Good 4 U' started blast on the stage speakers. y/n entered stage left in her dress in heels. she walked like a model. once she reached the mic she grabbed it, spun around and blew a kiss at the crowd. everyone started cheering and y/n started singing. "Well good for you I guess you moved on really easily."'

matt was frozen he didn't know what the hell to do, as he looked towards the stage to find a familiar face.

MATT POV

i looked towards the stage and i saw a girl who looked to be y/n. she looked so...different. she looked good. she dyed her hair. she shaped up. damn, is that what breakups do to someone. i-i can't believe she's here. and where did she learn to sing like that. i felt megan's grip on my arm and she jumped up and down signing with y/n.

Y/N POV

"Well good for you I guess you're getting everything you want." 'you bought a new car and your careers really taking off' i sung. wow, this was amazing, i cannot believe i am on stage right now. wait is that who i think it is. oh my fucking god. it's matt. omg i cannot believe i signed her picture and she dates...matt.

MATT POV

damn she's really good. wait is this the tiktoker megan was talking about? is this the whole reason megan wanted to come? i can't believe how much y/n's changed. i wonder...has she been thinking about me to?

Y/N POV

why does he keep staring at me. maybe he's enjoying it. alright maybe i should do something big for the end to impress him. or make him jealous. i think i should jump into the crowd. 'like a damn sociopath, i've lost my mind and i've spent the night crying on the floor of my bathroom' alright get ready.

3RD POV

y/n got ready to finish the song as she l=made eye contact with matt. she jumped off the stage and into the crowd. she made her way onto the floor in the middle right with megan and matt. they made eye contact. she spun around whipping him in the face with her long goddess braids as she ran back up stage and finished the song. "Well good for you I guess you moved on really easily."

MATT POV

well ouch for one. why did she jump off the stage and come to me. why did she make eye contact with me. why did she whip her hair onto me. i can't help but to think this song, this performance, that dress, the new look, was all meant for. me.

FROM VENUSღ hey guys! hope you liked this chapter, it was A LOT to write! how did y'all like my suprise. i mean coryxkenshin, like what ? when did he get here. anyways remember my dm's are always open, so if you have any ideas or suggestion, i'm happy to help. :)

[pancake-breakfast]

Trigun Book Club! Trigun Book Club! (@trigunbookclub)

Way back in the mid-2000's, a young Pancake Ray was working their first job out of college at a local Giant Chain Bookstore and discovered that no one else working the store cared if they spent their breaks sitting on the floor in front of our rather impressive two and a half bays of manga we had and just... read them right there. Much manga was read, and among the titles read were both Trigun and what was available at that time of Trigun Maximum.

I remember very little from that initial read aside from 1) confusing fight scenes, and 2) enough deviation from the anime (which I had recently watched) that I didn't really have a place for at that time. The anime had wormed itself into a very special place in my heart, so between the differences and just not being in a good place spiritually to handle some of its more religious themes, I wasn't really sure what to do with it. It probably didn't help that, back then, the manga was nowhere near finished.

I still read every volume we had, because gods, I read anything that looked even remotely interesting on the manga shelves at that time.

Now, an older and (debatably) wiser Ray is going to be reading these along with the rest of the Trigun Book Club Denizens. But first, I want to start of with a quote from the notes in The New Oxford Annotated Bible (3rd Ed.) in their prelude to I Kings, which is what I'm currently studying:

There is, on the other hand, no neat correlation between sin and judgment in Kings, largely because of the compassionate character of the Judge who accepts the repentant sinner, who does not desire final judgment to fall upon his creatures, and who is always ready to find cause why such judgment should be delayed or mitigated.

It just seemed like something to keep in mind when thinking about the character of Vash... but YMMV.

Onward!

Stream-of consciousness thoughts for Trigun Vol. 1, Chapters 1-3 below. (More detailed thoughts will be their own posts.)

Trigun Volume 1 Covers

Ok, first off... I love the alternate covers Nightow did. The stark contrast between the serious cleanliness of the covers and the crazy tongue-in-cheek alternate version really sets the tone.

LOL, "Deep Space Planet Future Gun Action!!" Yep, that's it. That's all it is.

How have I never seen Meryl as Luke Skywalker before??

Chapter 1: The $$60,000,000,000 Man

This poster says "Appearance: Unclear," but it also has a picture of him. I'm not sure what to make of that.

Vash's face is so goofy. It's like if his world isn't ACTIVELY ON FIRE, he doesn't know how to be serious. I do like the belts. When watching S1 of Stampede, I missed the belts. I hope S2 has more belts. Something something fetish gear.

I love that there's actually a tally of all this on a wall somewhere. SEVENTY FREAKING TWO MURDER CASES.

Kid: "Mom, I want a gun." Mom: "You already have a gun at home." The Gun At Home: *only shoots toy darts when you, a child no older than 8, are living in the Space Wild Wild West and think you need real bullets*

I love how quickly Vash goes from "OMG FOOD" face to SERIOUS EATING FACE.

And it's immediately followed by this CLOSE-UP ASS SHOT. WHYYYYYY???

I don't know who this cloaked guy who's cocking his shotgun by shaking it vertically is, but I love his stupid hair.

Yeah, you don't get to kill the protagonist THAT fast....

WW isn't even here yet and Nightow's already filling panels with man-tiddies...

LOL, he counted ALL the bullets in that page that was... just... it was just bullet fire. Somehow he counted them all. For every gun. And now everyone else has to leave stripped down to their boxers.

I love that someone, somewhere decided they needed to have a pinball machine all the way out here in nowheresville.

Ah there are the girls. Milly looks so worried about the catcalls, but Meryl? Meryl looks bored.

Chapter 2: Looney Tunes

Ok, first off, this chapter title just makes me think of ep 12 of Stampede when So-and-So starfishes his way out a window before floundering in the air for a second of hangtime and then falling.

Exposition! Huzzah!

Population decline slowing = humans adapting to the new environment. Resilient little buggers.... I know someone who probably HATES that statistic.

So, basically... before July, Vash was small beans. Or going by another name.

Aaaand straight into his goofy poses. This man is made of rubber, I swear.

LOL, why is he talking in French?! I guess a guy's gotta have his hobbies....

But Meryl... I'm with Milly here. Is it really that dangerous??

Ah, yes. The ol' "they'll understand me better if I just speak louder" trick. A favorite of Americans traveling in non-English-speaking countries when said American hasn't bothered to learn even the tiniest bit of the local language.

Current favorite Vash Chaos Pose:

LOL, "MY DEEPEST APOLOGIES FOR INTERRUPTING THIS CONFUSION." This feels like such a Japanese thing to say. It's like, "I know you're all engaged in frantic chaos right now, and because you're engaged in it, it must be very important to you, so I, the intruder, must offer my sincere regret for interrupting it."

I wonder how this version of Milly will merge with a Milly who was crazy enough to volunteer for the position of Meryl's partner in Stampede.

This Vash is definitely not so keen on being caught, even in the face of suffering women and children.

But here he is, protecting the very people who had guns in his face a second ago.

Chapter 3: Hard Puncher

Current favorite Vash Serious Pose:

Ok, I have thoughts here.

Sooooo many shonen speed lines....

Current favorite Vash Action Pose (That intense side eye is *chef's kiss*.)

Man, poor Gosef. But Vash standing over his prone form looks badass.

LOL, the Insurance Girls finally have everyone's attention, and.. they look like they don't want it anymore.

Hahahahaha, there goes the bounty. Can't put a bounty on a natural disaster. The federal government has officially labeled him "not human." *pats Vash*

Actually, he looks kinda happy about this. I guess not having a bounty on your head anymore might do that.

He can still have the head-pats.

The difference in his expression when greeting Meryl versus greeting Milly....

For as terrible as Mr. Nebraska himself is, I always appreciated how much he seems to genuinely care about his son in his own weird way.

Gods, I'm glad every other version got rid of his gun legs, though. That's... a Thing, and I don't like this Thing.

And just like that, Vash goes from "concerned about these girls constantly being around him" to "mildly intimidated by them." Beautiful.

(Thanks to @trigun-manga-overhaul for their translations and making this series accessible!)

[celestial-sapphicss]

i have finally finished my only 12% and if you saw me curled up crying on the floor no you didn't. some of the choices made in the show were so absolutely phenomenal i just have to talk about them (no matter how incoherent i may be)

i loved that the storytelling wasn't rushed. like desis like to say, itmenaan se batao, tell it with patience! it's very easy to make the show dragged out, especially when it's a slowburn romance, but i was still at the edge of my seat all the time! (except maybe last 2 eps but that says more about me than the show lol, if i start to rant about the father I'll never really stop)

in continuation of the above point, the choice to let the scenes linger a little bit longer after the plot point/conversation was over was so good! for example, literally every scene with the friends doing their basic kids nonsense! (bestest friend groups really <3)

that terrifying Eminem poster that gave me a jump scare everytime it was in shot ☠️ also the fleabag poster for some reason, in a show set in late 2000s/early 2010s!!! (i.e. make a show so good that even bizzare mistakes seem negligible)

speaking of the show's setting, oh such a core memory to see MSN, the flip phones, skype, that box windows computer, adding relationship statuses on Facebook, peak 2012. (im a sucker for nostalgia!)

i don't think i have to talk about how beautifully written CakeEiw's friendship was! them cuddling to sleep and Cake just spreading his arms for 'HUG! 😁', yeah. adorable

Eiw's discovery of his sexuality (with Love of Siam) and Hom being so supportive of him! im so glad Eiw had such a supportive family and friends! no matter how much of an 'other' Eiw felt like, no one near & dear to him let him feel like that and its SO important (snickering at the fact that Earth is older than Prem).

the entire America plot, omg, bawling. who hasn't had that friend who moved away, or who hasn't been the one to move away at some point? it was so well done, and all the scenes between CakeEiw post Cake telling Eiw that he's moving had such a bittersweetness to it, especially on the last day when they're promising each other sweet nothings! (kudos to the actors!)

Eiw saying that he's sad that he discovered his love for Cake but now he has to move away? KNIFE IN MY HEART! Eiw sniff kissing Cake and Cake coming back from the car to hug Eiw even tighter? NO PAIN

the letter/email style story telling in ep9 🤌 i love that they didn't go for the "they grew apart in the 3 years" or "one of them isn't replying" etc etc tropes because not only i don't like them but also it would be so out of character for them! and correct use of emerging tech!

love the confidence and the glow up for Eiw! he joined so many activities, making new friends, becoming part of the drama club, dresses like a fkn model, also got his hair dyed, GOOD FOR HIM

Cake in Blonde™! Him immediately begging his mum to let him see Eiw after getting back (in the middle of the night!). him crying and wiping his tears when Eiw hugged him at the bus stop. he's everything to me. Eiw repeating Cake's name on repeat and asking him to always respond? 😭

the enitre subplot of Pu & Tal wanting to be with Eiw was so funny to me skskskskks because have they seen CakeEiw together? one could be with their partners but would still feel like a third wheel in front of them. (and that's BEOFRE they officially got together) INSUFFERABLE

oh the post-show CakeEiw fight, & Eiw saying "Have you ever had to be the one who waits?" holt saying PAIN.gif. that entire confrontation/confession was so intense that i understand the choice to spread it out in between two episodes. and finally Cake saying "then i will be gay with you" had me laughing in the middle of all these tears he's such a best boy i love him dearly. (i was lowkey scared of the 'im not gay i just like you' making a comeback lol)

CakeEiw's relationship being written just as good (if not better) than their friendship!!!! the scene with "i love everything about you"? crying screaming shaking. Cake being basically a puppy? love that for Eiw

in conclusion, CakeEiw best boys and i miss them dearly and i want them back already

[kolbisneat]

MONTHLY MEDIA: June 2023

Summer months here we go! Just wrapped up my time with Zelda so I foresee more reading and tv in my future again. In the meantime, here’s how I spent June!

……….FILM……….

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023) Saw it twice and the first time was very nearly too much to take in. The second viewing was far less overwhelming and still a joy. While it didn’t feel like a complete story following Miles, at least there’s some satisfying conclusion with Gwen. I’m glad part 2 comes out in less than a year. 

Ali Wong: Baby Cobra (2016) Maybe I wasn’t in the right mood or maybe going with one of her older specials wasn’t the right call but I wasn’t really feeling it. I can see hints of overlapping themes that pop up in BEEF (which I loved and why I wanted to watch one of her specials) but that was more interesting than it was funny. Still gonna check out her other specials.

Goldeneye (1995) I have more memories playing the game than watching the movie but still a big fan of this flick. Really great characters and locales and I forgot just how comedic it is. So many one-liners! Always feels a little long at the end but worth it to see Boris’ death scene.

Encanto (2021) Late to seeing this and really great! Beautiful and personal and peak musical songs where characters basically ONLY share their personality through song.

……….TELEVISION……….

Ted Lasso (Episode 3.11 to 3.12) I was really dragging my feet about finishing the series as I found season 3 wasn’t as consistently enjoyable to watch. But those last two eps really stuck the landing. Some beats were expected, some were welcome surprises, and there were so many callbacks that were naturally woven in that I was really impressed. Some of the best from the season (and on par with the rest of the series) and I’m really glad I finished it.

……….YOUTUBE……….

Do "gun buybacks" work? by Vox A really succinct breakdown of how the US can do better, and an honest look at why this needs to be a part of a more complex plan. VIDEO

Agnostic TTRPG Prep Method by Map Crow Really fun way to use all the books that you’re not currently using! Watch the vid and then if you like the process you can pick up the bundle HERE (not affiliated, just a fan). VIDEO

The Station Toronto Needs by RMTransit Hey I’m a big fan of trains and I just found this channel. This was my first introduction to them but I’m keen to watch more. More trains! VIDEO

How Editing Creates Comedies That Make You Cry... by The Editing Podcast Another channel I recently came across and I’m keen to watch more. I know very little about editing but am keen to learn more.  VIDEO

……….READING……….

Bullshit Jobs by David Graeber (Page 7 of 285) Clearly I’ve only just started this (thanks to me dragging my feet on The Righteous Mind) but really excited to dig deeper. The prologue is the original essay that inspired the book and that alone already has so much in it! A really great primer and I wasn’t expecting it to lay a lot of the blame at capitalism’s feet so I think it’s gonna be a great read. 

The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion by Jonathan Haidt (Complete) The first time I read this (at a time when the COVID-19 vaccine was just coming out and folks were choosing not to get it) the book really helped me understand the reasoning behind other people’s choices. For that it was really helpful. This time around, with more time and more political moves behind us, I find it glaringly obvious just how out of touch (or conservative-leaning) this book is. There’s a whole section about how the free market and capitalism is good for healthcare. Wild stuff. If you want more in-depth reviews explaining why this didn’t sit right with me this time around, I found Storygraph had a lot of great write-ups (also Storygraph is great if you want an alternative to the amazon-owned Goodreads).

Delicious in Dungeon Vol. 12 by Ryoko Kui (Complete) Listen I sing this series’ praises every time I read a volume and this is no different. Somehow the story, setting, and characters grow while still remaining connected to the main theme of “what if we ate the monsters we fought in an RPG?” It’s truly top-tier and I can’t stress enough that if you like charming, funny, expertly-illustrated comics, you should try out this series.

The Fade Out by Ed Brubaker, Sean Phillips, and Elizabeth Dismang (Complete) Really fun read. Old Hollywood murder mystery with a lot of really nuanced characters. The resolution felt a little abrupt and unsatisfying, but without giving anything away I think it was appropriate. I’m also not sure if it was a stylistic choice but all of the women have different shadows than the men. It feels like they’re living in two different worlds but maybe that’s intentional? Still really great.

……….AUDIO……….

PetroDragonic Apocalypse; or, Dawn of Eternal Night: An Annihilation of Planet Earth and the Beginning of Merciless Damnation by King Gizzard (2023) Loved King Giz’s first foray into metal and this continues that trend. I may not love everything that they do, but I love that they do everything that they do.

……….GAMING……….

Oz: A Fantasy Role-Playing Setting (Andrews McMeel Publishing) The Tuesday Crew is currently up against a young dragon (Dragonette) plaguing a mine (recap HERE) while the Mof1 Crew is divided across Munchkin District and each dealing with their own small crisis. They say never split the party but I think the trouble gets way more interesting when you do.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom (Nintendo) Finally moving on from this after countless hours spent in this world and it’s all bittersweet. Loved the familiar stuff, loved the new stuff, and loved the overall arc of the game. Hopefully the next game in the series goes back to something smaller and focused.

And that’s it. See you in July!

[absolutebl]

I kinda fell out of the BL game the last several months thanks to irl things, but I think I'm finally feeling like wading fully back in. I started with Love Syndrome III(only because @heretherebedork piqued my interest) and just finished Moonlight Chicken. What should I watch next? My limits are romanticized sexual assault, cheating, miscommunication as a main plot point, and no HEA. I could also do without a straight side couple, but I'd tolerate it if the main plot and couple are really good. Bonus points if there's a D/s dynamic, but that's not 100% necessary.

Thanks ❤️

Best of 2023 So Far?

Of course darling!

Hum last several months? Let's see...

Our Dating Sim (Viki) - if you haven't watched this it's a must. I actually handed out a 10/10. I NEVER do that. I can't tell you how much I loved this show (or have already rewatched it). It's a perfect short form KBL, an office set reunion romance featuring geeks that really suits 8 eps with no fluff and no chaff. Just comforting and yummy. Full review.

The New Employee (Viki) - just so good, SO QUEER, so soft, a near pitch perfect office BL with conflict derived from that setting. Also... Rainbow Rice Cakes and found fam and a lesbian bestie and all the goodness. My review is on MDL.

The Eighth Sense (Viki) - speaking of queer, this one is a bit rough (sticky and gritty), more in the Moonlight Chicken area. But very high quality, fabulous chemistry, and a remarkably complex offering for a KBL - think Blueming-esk but even better.

Unintentional Love Story (iQIYI) - @heretherebedork and I LOVED this one, but it is kinda hard to get hold of. I found the seme a bit stiff and reserved but Gongchan (who plays the uke) is a fucking GIFT. He has THE MOST expressive eyes, just drown in the emoting abyss. The external conflict tension and pressure is complex and excellent plus Korea gave us legit side dishes (NOT a love triangle, hally-fucking-luya). Review on MDL.

My School President (YouTube) - I adored this one! My favorite GMMTV offering in dog's age, and my new favorite pair GeminiFourth. It could have gotten a 10/10 from me but for too much singing. This is the side pair from Moonlight Chicken anchoring a high school BL full of the most teenage pining ever and it's GREAT.

All the Liquors (Viki, Gaga) - another KBL hitting hard and solid. This one is KBL-weird in the way of Tasty Florida or Behind Cut (which I've gotten used to, but is kinda a "type" now). It will wig you out if you have any baggage around alcohol. The logic behind the phobias are typically Asian romance qua? BUT it's still quite cute.

Never Let Me Go (YT) - of GMMTV handing out new series to established pairs this has been the most successful IMHO. PondPhuwin were about 10000x better in this than FUTS (and that's FUTS's fault, not theirs). It's typically Thai in that its a bit bloated and has a confusing plot, but at least it HAD a plot and the central relationship is solid and loyal. Their Our Skyy 2 follow up is also good. And very much adds to the cannon in a fun way rather than feeling superfluous - making this show ultimately 14 eps rather than the usual 12.

Bed Friend (YT, iQIYI, Gaga) - speaking of a bit bloated, this one derailed somewhat in plot for me (even at 10 eps) but NetJames really are glorious, and absolutely the hottest and the prettiest of 2023. Full of triggers for childhood abuse and sexual assault (backstory), but the main pair is very communication-heavy and based on a fuck buddy premise which has negotiation and everything, unique & fun to see. This is my high heat rec for the year so far, because the heat is PART OF THE PLOT and that's a gift we don't usually get. Review on MDL.

Between Us (iQIYI) - I'm still processing this one. I didn't have as high expectations as most but it was still a little disappointing. BounPrem are lovely of course, but somehow it just wasn't quite what I wanted. I did a watch along for this one so you can see me struggle. However, objectively, held up against other BLs? It's actually pretty darn good.

I hope some of these you haven't seen. None have romanticized sexual assault, cheating, or miscommunication as a main plot point (hum... maybe Between Us? Honestly I can't remember the plot points, it was all over the place), and all have HEA (this is me after all(.

[hils79]

Hils Watches My School President - Ep 12 (Part 1)

Can't believe we're at the end already. Please don't expect me to be normal about Tiw and Por because I won't be.

I love how they set her up to be the villain of the story but actually she just wants her son to be happy.

And I love that Tinn's parents actually have a really healthy relationship (I mean apart from the time they told Tinn about all the sex they were going to have while he was away studying)

Got to get in one last printer product placement before the end

Tinn is so smooth for someone who is such a nerd (affectionate)

He is 100% correct and should say it

Of course we have to have a dramatic being outed plot to finish things off

My sweet son Por was literally the only member of the band who hadn't figured out Tinn and Gun were together. I love him.

Haha! Phat knew about Tinn and Gun but did not know about Win and Sound. Everyone's worlds getting shook today

Por is really going to be shook when he finds out that Tinn was helping because he likes Gun, and Tiw was helping because he likes Por

I thought Jorn was going to be homophobic but actually he's just mad that music club was getting preferential treatment because Tinn liked Gun. And, you know, he kind of has a point.

Character development

I love that we've now reversed roles and Gun is trying to protect Tinn, even though Tinn very much does not want to be protected

Am I just old or is this a drama thing? So many BL dramas seem to have girls taking photos of boys and posting about how they ship them on social media. It's kind of creepy.

Baby just found out what the name order in a ship means. Everyone getting their minds blown in this episode

I'm pretty sure it's TinnGun, actually

Some punch the shitty homophobic teacher

No, really, someone punch him

FUCK ME! Jorn punched him! Good for you, sweetie!

You had better fire that homophobic teacher, ma'am

YES DESTROY HIM

Oh no I'm crying again

I love that some dramas just squeeze in redemption arcs for characters who don't deserve it. Then you have Jorn who hates unfairness to the point of punching a homophobic teacher. I love him.

Aww look at Sound kissing his boyfriend on stage in front of everyone. Good for them.

God they are so stinking cute

GDI I've hit the image limit and there's still another 30 minutes to go so I guess once final part 2

Part 2

[kalakilo]

ranking nightmare time episodes

under the cut because this is gonna be a long post and it is only for me and no one else<3

i recently finished all the nmt episodes and now that i have no more new hatchetfield content to consume i need to dish out feelings and opinions and i like ranking things i like. this is based on vibes mostly. and my attachment to these characters. i love all of these episodes and the entire cast and nick & matt lang for giving me so much lore to chew on. here is the brutal order of ranking my children

13. daddy

somebody had to be last......first of all i just wanna say jaime lyn beatty is a literal god for performing the double role of sherman and sheila young here, she IS versatility in human form. however young at heart just isn't one of my favourite songs and sherman & frank really aren't as compelling characters to me as some other ones in the hatchetverse and i feel like it doesn't offer that much more lore to me.

i do find that there is a lot to be said about the way sheila holds frank & toy zone hostage with her money and it's yet another case of characters using their money for power and glory in hatchetfield and how those characters eventually become victims of the lords in black and characters that abuse their power. i still had so much to say about this even though it's last on this list and that also speaks to how GOOD this series is okay

12. perky's buds

this one is just absurd????? i truly think perky's buds, jane's a car and hey melissa are the holy trinity of batshit nmt episodes.

this is essentially the most we ever learn about the hatchetmen and their descendants (the metzgers) which makes me a little sad, that lore i am still a bit lost on and honestly the amount of lore (and this being grace chasity's first appearance in canon) is mostly the only reason i prefer this one over daddy. also the fact that joey richter plays a monotone talking bird + emma finally gets her pot farm (even if it all burns down in the end</3). this one is just a little silly to me and the song isn't my favourite either, it's a taste of characters (like the metzgers and ziggs) and lore about the history of hatchetfield and i just wish we knew more

11. forever and always

this is my official apology to paulkins nation for having this ep so low lmao sorry guys

if i'm being honest my favourite part about this episode is how it weaves together with time bastard. idk if i'm allowed to say this out loud because i fear i'll get crucified by starkid / hatchetverse people but honestly i'm not *that* invested in paulkins as a ship.......i love that in this iteration they are just so fucked up and weird, i remember in the hotel scene thinking there is NO way paul wouldn't kill emdroid here. she is an EVIL ANDROID!!!! and then the reveal that he's actually paul 23 made so much sense. anyway i like this one and i REALLY like the song!! it's so fun having such a heartfelt sounding song at the top of the episode and then it actually being so fucked up by the end.

10. hey, melissa!

tbh i wanted this one to be higher because it was SO absurd in a way perky's buds could never even fucking dream of, i truly want to know what possessed nick & matt lang to think that the side character who has maybe four lines in tgwdlm likes dehumanizing men and turning them into her pets???

all this being said i think hey melissa gets a bit of a bad rep in the fandom. i actually think it's a very interesting episode, i will never ever stop thinking about WHY paul makes the decision at the end as he does? i think there is so much to dissect there and in general about paul as a character in this episode. we really don't learn a lot about paul in tgwdlm and in contrast, in the timeline of hey melissa we hear an entire story from his childhood that clearly impacted him a lot? and it's something he thinks about to this day!

i also really wonder the question of if he hadn't told that story, would melissa still have him held captive?? obviously melissa is not a very reliable character in the early part of the story, but paul's memory clearly affects her a lot? does she actually lose faith in him in that moment? and that's why she decides to keep him as her dog (of course he doesn't end up being one lmao) ? i just think there's a lot to be said about this episode! still, i am def forever haunted by this and can't never hear it the same when humans say bark or meow. also what do you MEAN you'd have to NEUTER him to let him OUTSIDE

9. the hatchetfield ape-man

this one has such a special place in my heart for whatever reason<33 full disclosure angela as lucy stockworth is also maybe 80% of why this is higher than the others so far, it's just so fun seeing her play a character who seemingly is just so innocent and sweet and has such a big heart but then who's also very aware of what she's doing and schemes a bit herself. i can't believe this is the only iteration of lucy stockworth what is she doing in the other timelines. i want to know.

also idk why but the reveal that ted was just playing konk fucked me UP!!! like that was insane. also as the first episode that has the cast and nick & matt still figuring everything out it's just very sweet and heartwarming which you cant say about a lot of hatchetfield content<33 honestly no real explanations for this one i just love angela giarratana and also jamie lyn beatty for singing HERE'S A LITTLE STORY BOUT THE HATCHETFIELD APE-MAN

8. watcher world

the scenes with the sniggles???? genuinely horrifying. the idea in itself that someone is always watching is so creepy, i think blinky is maybe actually the most terrifying lord in black. at least he manages to have the most terrifying nmt episode. the fact that he somehow makes a father and daughter almost kill each other and wants to watch for his own enjoyment like........this one actually haunts me sm!!!! wtf is that scene with alice and the blinky mascot!!!!!!

it's also one of the only hatchetfield stories with a genuinely happy ending with basically no catch. and after bill and alice's tragic fate in tgwdlm i'm so glad they also get a good ending<33 it's also just so lovely to see them actually bond in this story and we learn a lot about alice !

this one also has so many songs and i am of the opinion that snoozle town is genuinely heartbreaking and the way angela can just do that while singing the most insane shit like "and we'll have two snoozles that can snozzle / our own bayou where the boogle boggles flow with goo" is beautiful

7. jane's a car

GOT MY FOOT ON THE GAS ok im SORRY im sorry its just. funny

tbh i am a little sad this gets reduced to the car sex episode, i think it does have a lot to say about navigating grief when you feel like you've finally been able to move on and live life again and suddenly the person you lost is back in your life. and they're also a car.

not to mention the ending???? is fucking terrifying????? poor becky quite literally dies and the "mommy's home" paired with the way the script narrates the moment as "becky sits down and jane smiles". like that's. cunt

anyway just to conclude i really wish more people understood the more compelling parts of this episode and not just tom fucks a car!!!! dont overstimulate the cupholders!!!!!

6. honey queen

i was GAGGED seeing the editing quality step up from nmt 1. this is truly the cuntiest nmt episode because we pit two beautiful queens each other and BOTH just fucking perish lmao (that editing step up also contributed so much to the final scene being so terrifying. it's an incredible introduction to nibbly and the scene being followed by the nibbly ditty is just SO gooooooooooooooood)

something i did already mention when talking about daddy is the continued sort of "motif" that rich people either still always lose to the lords in black or (something that i didn't bring up last time) they themselves are corrupt and have essentially sold their souls to the lords in black. like gerald & linda lie, cheat, steal and kill their way to win this pageant and yet. they still both die.

also also!!!!! i love that we learn how linda ended up so incredibly cold and uncaring. like it's not just from being rich as fuck, it's also trauma from being mocked, ridiculed and ignored throughout your entire childhood. i think roman murray might genuinely be the most evil character in hatchetfield and i loooove how jon matteson plays him. king shit

i also just love. gerald and linda. they are so fucked up and so perfect for each other. the way gerald helps her so much to sabotage the pageant and is her BIGGEST cheerleader, knows that deep down linda does not like her father and is afraid of him and literally gets himself killed essentially in support of her.............i love them.

5. time bastard

i'm gonna be honest i wasn't ted's biggest fan after tgwdlm so i didn't reaaaally understand the love i saw for him in the fandom, but after time bastard i really got it. time bastard actually fleshes out ted as a character and even though by the end he kind of is still a dumbass we do still learn a lot about him!! tinky and his little box are both objectively terrifying and being stuck in his box honestly sounds like a worse fate than hell. i feel bad for ted ngl

the reveal that homeless guy is ted spankoffski is also so insane. like the fact that these two exist in the same timeline a lot of the time is so interesting and also brings up the question of did the homeless guy ever try to go into ccrp and try to take his job back??? or did he just resign to his fate. we dont know. speaking of ccrp also learning more lore about what a fucked company it actually is super interesting, especially knowing they too tried to harness tinky's power.

my one and only gripe with time bastard is that it gets a little too complicated for me at some points but that's more a me problem, it just feels slightly hard to wrap my head around it while also connecting it to the events of forever and always. i do love complicated lore but this one fucks w my head sometimes

4. abstinence camp

as a grace chasity girl it is illegal for me to have this episode any lower than in the top 5. these top 4 episodes truly expose my favourite hatchetfield characters so bad lmao

god abstinence camp is SO funny!! the writing here is hilarious, just grace's first appearance is so silly and angela does such a stellar job. i love her in this role so much. along w her i'm so glad this story introduced us to boy jerry and girl jeri who i am begging to see again in another timeline like i need to see their backstory!! how did they find each other the first time and how did they end up abandoning their faith to have a child!!!! jon matteson and kim whalen are so good in these roles

we also cant talk about abstinence camp without mentioning that virginity rocks is objectively the BEST nmt song. jon and kim are serving absolute vocals it is such a banger and the fact that they paired it with axe man is so fucking sick

3. killer track

killer track is the only nmt episode so far that's made me actually cry. god. he was watching the fireworks.

to be completely honest i. don't even know what to comment on for this episode i'm just stuck in never ending holloweane brainrot. god he's so in love with her. AND SO AM I!!! miss holloway is such a compelling character and this nmt episode especially teases a lot about how she ended up the way she is. we also learn about her past and just like everything about her is so interesting to me, i love her protective nature but also that she's so calculated in her every move. and somehow always knows exactly what to do. also i love duke keane i can't leave him out of this

the concept of this episode is also just so viscerally horrifying, it's essentially something i used to have nightmares about like something scary that's ringing so loudly in your ears that nothing can block it out so this genuinely hit like a sort of irrational fear that i pretty much used to have as a kid. it's not so bad that i can't watch but still hit me in a sort of way that reminded me of my own fears. maybe that's also why i love miss holloway she would save me if i ever ended up in that situation

2. the witch in the web

i feel like witch in the web is very underrated?? i don't see a lot of people talking about it compared to some other episodes which i think is such a shame because it's so incredible

the scene where hannah thinks she's seeing lex and then it turns out to be the witch was SO spooky watching it the first time, seeing angela play out this sort of over-excited version of lex and it slooowly becoming more and more sinister is so insane especially with her pulling out the dolls of the lords in black. it's such a great scene!!

also the lore we learn about the witchwood forest and what originally happened to willabella muckwab and how the black book came to be is so integral to the entire lore, and i love the way it's told with hannah & miss holloway sort of walking in this old dreamlike world. plus the confrontation with wilbur cross in the starlight GOD this episode has so many cool moments and it can do so much because they're in nightmare time and not in actual hatchetfield most of the time. i do, however, despise the idea that lex foster is serving what FOUR years in prison in this timeline. dont do that to my girl

1. yellow jacket

the scene where hannah & ethan come home and lex is waiting for them, so disappointed in herself not only for forgetting hannah's birthday but also for failing the test, angry at ethan for not reminding her about hannah's birthday.....that scene is probably my favourite moment in the entire hatchetverse? angela just fucking blew me away she plays it so well and not to mention joey richter ethan just. kills

yellow jacket just had to be first here, i'm so invested in these relationships and their past and how it led them to where they are here, the way this episode portrays how hard it is for lex and ethan because they're just trying to survive on what little resources they have while lex is also taking care of hannah: she cares for her so much that she's wanted to move them out of their mom's trailer. of course hannah would feel responsible and maybe guilty because lex has so much to worry about, of course hannah wants to take the first opportunity she gets to make them copious amounts of money, of course she's willing to put herself in terrible danger, all to help lex.

i love seeing this perspective on hannah, especially since in black friday we mostly see lex (and ethan) protecting and saving hannah when she's in trouble (although she definitely can fend for herself a little!). in yellow jacket we really see how responsible hannah must feel. when her and ethan see the ipad as a possible prize, her first thought isn't all the fun things you could use the ipad for, it's how much money they could get selling it. she doesn't understand the sheer danger of fighting pokey, which makes sense since she doesn't know that that is quite literally an eldritch god, she just wants to support lex.

this episode is just incredible in its every element: the portrayal of the characters, the story and the way it talks about the influence that money has on people's lives. not to mention watching literal children fight each other for entertainment. it's brutal but the core relationships are what eventually survive despite the circumstances

well. this was long

[le-trash-prince]

Only Friends Episode 12 Thoughts

Overall, I think I'm pretty okay with how things ended! I didn't get everything exactly as I wanted, but I don't need a show to be perfect, and I got enough to chew on to make me happy.

I am sad that BostonNick didn't end up together, even though I know it was the right call, and it was honestly a better ending for them than what I was scared we would get LOL. Like usual I'll just make a separate post for this because I've got a lot to say about them

I do think Boston was owed more of an apology from his friends than what he got, but I'm not that surprised he didn't get it, and it's probably for the best that they're parting ways. And honestly, when a person is leaving the country, it can be easier to just say "Why bother apologizing if they don't give a shit anyways."

I know people were dissatisfied with Cheum's characterization as of Ep 11, but this episode really solidified how I see her--as someone who wants things to be happy on the surface and doesn't know how to really honestly confront what it is that people need. As the woman in the group, she's under pressure to be the peacekeeper and the nurturing influence and I don't think that role comes naturally to her. She's not good at it, and she shouldn't have to be. And I do honestly like that she was written that way. I wish she had gotten more screentime over the series, and maybe that could happen in a spinoff/sequel with some queer lady writers on the team. (I just finished the ep so I haven't looked at any announcements from the event on Saturday)

I do wish this series had been longer because it seemed it really had a lot of story to tell and not enough time to do it. But a longer season would also have been more stressful to deal with lmfao.

Some things I would have loved to see more of, off the top of my head: Daddy Dan, Sand's dad, Ray in rehab, Boeing.

I'm generally okay with where TopMew has ended up, and while I think there's more that could be explored in a future story, the only thing that really interests me regarding their relationship is Mew's physicality. But I would still like to see more growth from Mew, and I would like to know Top as a person because so much of his behavior and even his plans for the future are wrapped up in Mew.

I think SandRay ended on as satisfactory a note as could be managed. Did Ray's behavior towards Boeing piss me off? Sure. Do I think he needs more time to get his life together? Sure. Do I need a story to have its characters Do Every Correct Action Until Maximum Healthiness Is Achieved? No. They're talking things out and figuring out their relationship and that's what matters.

I am really gonna need that flight attendant!Boeing x NYC!Boston spinoff now thank you very much.

I don't hate the idea of a second season as much as I thought it would, although maybe it's because I'm biased and would want a season with BostonNick or Boston and Nick taking more central roles. I've gotten what I need out of TopMew and SandRay, but I think there's more story to be explored with other characters, and I wouldn't hate that. But I would hate to see tired breakup-drama second season tropes.

Debating whether I even want to catch up on everyone's reactions because I'm sure the ending was just loose enough to be divisive. Anyways I'm gonna go wrap up my playlist now bye lol

[brainlessbaguette]

Finished Fionna and Cake and I have some more thoughts, lots of spoilers below

So in regards to that Finn post I made after ep 1&2, apparently there was no more our Finn. In hindsight that makes sense but still a bummer that he didn't even get a cameo. I am absolutley stunned by the lack of Marcie mentions, especially in the finale. I am well aware that they wanted to branch out and away from the main cast for this one but this was very much a Simon story, despite being called Fionna and Cake. Your telling me we don't even get Simon recalling Marcie to talk or just a quick clip of them hanging, it felt wrong.

I did really enjoy the show. Like genuinely it was a great time, I recommend. I will say though it needed more episodes. Even just a "normal" 12, as far as smaller series go. They just wanted to do too much and didn't really get to stop and flesh out different ideas.

Now Adventure Time thrived at "dream logic" where crap didn't make sense, everyone in universe just excepted the most random ideas. It also had a sense of whimsy that it held while showing you some of the most gut punching stories. It was insane and the HBO stuff has felt more grounded I want to say? Like its lost that vibe. I didn't really notice it in "Together again" or "Obsidian" but "Bmo" definitely felt a bit off and "Wizard City" was... anyway after getting to see a full series it's just really brought that forward for me. Like its not bad it just doesn't fully feel like Adventure Time.

I will say for this series you could blame that on the fact we're following human Simon, who's here because he couldnt get behind that mindset and two outsiders. But thats not quite right. Its not so much a "how are the characters reacting to x" as much as it is "how is x being presented to we the viewer"

Its really hard to put to words. Uhh take Scarab I guess? In the original show you would've maybe had someone give Simon and the gang a quick explanation on who he is, a quick cutscene, or even just left it at what we see in the beginning. Not really going too deep. But instead they keep checking in on him and his little monologues, you even go to see his boss or manager dude. It felt like too much context for a character that did exactly as much as he would have regardless or whether or not we had that info. I feel like I know more about Scarab than I do the Lich and its weird.

It also, circling back, didn't work with how short the series was. They HAD to establish Fionna and Cake as actual characters and not just gender swaps, Simon needed to go through his whole arc. They then CHOSE to also establish Gary and Marshal in a B plot, Adventure Time really didn't have B plots so that was weird at first but it actually helped the Finale ep so they get a pass, and then added on Scarab with whatever he had going on, all while changing the setting and throwing in a new side cast every episode. They were working so hard to introduce everyone and get them through their stories that they really didnt have time to let the things settle. Like y'all remember in the Elements series how they took that whole (I think?)2nd episode to have Finn just sit down and process everything that had just happened and is currently happening. Was it the best episode? No. But gosh dang it did wonders for Jake's character, displaying how Finn has matured emotionally, giving the brothers a chance to connect(right before Jake disolves in some goo so that it hurts more), and gave the viewer a little break from non-stop action while also letting us catch back up all in a cute funny little Adventure Time way. Fionna and Cake NEEDED an episode like that. Because everything was so rushed they didnt really get to bond and grow together and grow away from the "owner pet dynamic." Finn and Jake had that line a little blurry in funny one off gags but they were absolutley brothers first, Fionna and Cake was on the other hand not that.

Anywho TL;DR, Show was good but pacing and vibes were off and would've benefited from at least two more episodes just to let things breathe.

I absolutley knew it about Simon's and Betty's relationship. I saw that coming from a mile away. That crap was so unhealthy and I'm glad they've made peace with that fact + Simon is getting therapy. Thank you Finn's mom.

Oh and last little bit, me being upset about my unanswered questions.

Uh how did Jake die? Cause Farmworld Finn's Jake is still alive and well, so its not of old age?

Why the heck did Prismo do a complete 180° so fast??? Your legit telling me that in 20-30 years(Idk how long but it's nothing compared to him) prismo, an immortal wishmaster, has turned into a washed up mess. Why? Where's cosmic owl, don't you guys still hang? Is it cause of our world Jake dying, if so back to question 1?

Not really specific to this show but Is PB still PB or just B? Cause she was living with Marcie in "Obsidian" and in "Together Again" Peppermint Butlers wearing her crown. Whose watching the candy kingdom, I'm just genuinley curious?

Is Farmworld Finn dead??? I genuinely don't think he is because Scarabs whole job seems to be keeping thing running smoothly and killing a reincarnated catalyst comet seems like it would be a big screw up. Also Jay and LD didn't seem upset, so I'm gonna go with no he's fine? But they also DIDN'T GIVE ME CLOSURE!

ALSO why are Jay and LD ditching they're families for Fionna's world? That seems out of character and overall just a weird choice.

DID THEY PUT BABY FINN BACK IN BABY WORLD??? Is there a baby jake without Finn??? I am devastated.

What was the point of sending Simon into Shermie's body other than the cameo? Like I love to see em, but we were pressed for time and they're could've been another way to do that right? It just felt weird.

Why did Prismo send Jay, LD, Baby Finn, and the tank peppermint butler anyways? There was definitely a different way to do that.

Lastly but most importantly

There was no Fionna meets our Finn??? Why it's all I wanted, even just a two second she bumped into him while chasing after Cake and neither of them realized. I would've been so happy and I'm a little salty now.

Very rambly as per usual. If you made it down here thank you for tuning into "me chucking my random thoughts about a very specific topic into the void of the internet because, regardless of whether or not people read, its surprisingly very thereputic to just write them all out there," we are currently workshoping that title.