#even if they did get nekkid for a bit XD

[victorluvsalice]

Well, Alice was mostly wandering around outside, dealing with the full moon and her rapidly-building Fury. While Smiler worked on their Inner Peace with some yoga, and Victor worked on his by trying out the flower arranging bench for the first time, Alice worked on hers by indulging in some howling, some more scavenging, and a milk, honey, and oatmeal soak. Hey, given she was guaranteed to rampage that night, I felt she deserved it.

Before rampages, though, we had an important event to attend -- the Spirit Squad bar night! Because I was in a race to see if I could max out Smiler’s Spirit Squad rank before they graduated, and hanging out with their fellow Squad members seemed like a great day to do that! Smiler started things off by giving everyone nearby a boost of happiness and doing a few cheers. . .

And then the “Erratic” trait kicked in, and they started showering in the rain before trying to lead another Foxbury cheer while still naked. As you can see, their fellow patrons kind of objected to that. XD The animation never completed, though, so I was able to get Smiler back in clothes to continue the night. They had a pretty nice time, overall -- goofing around with their friends, Detecting Personalities on people they didn’t know very well, and taunting rival students before instantly making friends with them because they’re just so lovable when they introduce themselves. :P Didn’t get as much progress on the organization’s membership bar as I hoped, but completing the “Taunt Rival Student” task and a few cheers did move it in the right direction. At least there’s still a chance of maxing it out while Smiler’s still a student!

But the bar night didn’t last forever, and soon Smiler had to go home and face the full moon. . .

[messedupessy]

HERE HE IS MR GORE HIMSELF (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ❤

Holy sheit this goat man took way longer than I had planned, but shit am I proud af of myself for drawing and finishing him like srsly look at him grnekjgnkej xD

I am so proud of his design, his armour is very influenced by The Iron Bull from Dragon Age Inquisition, because this guy needed a tiddy window ok. His hair is black but it is blue so u can see the small details of it because I did not spend like over an hour drawing it all for it not to be visible! I’m just mgejkgkje so happy how he turned out so proud of myself, drawing them goats are always such a pain after all, and yes you get a nekkid version bc srsly I worked hard on that flipping body hair! xD

Ok here is some personality stuff for him yes, putting it under a cut UwU ❤

Got a pretty dark and twisted sense of humor, is extremely deadpan with his jokes and no one is ever sure if he means them or not, he often do say it was a joke after a bit of silence. It’s one of his fave past times to watch people squirm a little while unsure if they should laugh or not.

Is kind of an arse. 

He almost always looks very grumpy, is also very silent unless he really have to speak, or if you are close to him then he speaks much more. A tad bit scary, likes to scare and surprise people by suddenly appearing behind them, as he is somehow extremely silent even though he is massive. 

Is pretty damn apathetic towards most things, he doesn’t really care what happens to people or anyone anymore after the death of his children and the betrayal of his wife. He only really steps in on things when it suits him or he feels up for it, which is one of the reasons why Edge controls most of the underground.

Post pacifist, so is he the one who ends up adopting Ruffles, aka UF Frsk, they helped him relearn to properly care again, and he hopes that he can make up for his past mistakes with his own children through them. But also because he genuinely cares about them. 

Gore and Red got a weird relationship going, they are kind of friends, also king and his judge, but they also kinda hate one another and kinda want to kill each other. They also fuck.     

[far-off-flower-fields]

Weird Questions that say a lot

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Teacups!

2. chocolate bars or lollipops? Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy? Cotton candy

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you? We call elementary school primary school. It depended which teachers you asked, my favourites always said I was “conscientious, kind, and a pleasure to have in class”.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Glass cups or bottles.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? I have like 4 looks, pastel, boho, and goth/witchy/grunge, also vintage-inspired which wasn’t mentioned but I love it.

7. earbuds or headphones? Depends on the shape, I love my Razr headset because it doesn’t squash my ears, and I like galaxy bud shaped earbuds, the ones with the little rubber doo-dads that fit actually in your ear. Apple or a lot of older flat earbuds cause me a lot of pain.

8. movies or tv shows? TV shows. Movies are getting longer and longer and my focus is getting shorter and shorter

9. favorite smell in the summer? Rainy days!

10. game you were best at in p.e.? The game of queue-ducking (where you go to the back of the queue to avoid your turn), or dance, or the less strength intensive parts of gymnastics. Or crying, always been great at that xD

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day? Muesli, or nothing.

12. name of your favorite playlist? I prefer to listen to full albums rather than playlists, but I have a few favourites on Spotify. Born to Run 150BPM, Infinite Indie Folk, Irish Folk: Jigs and Reels, All Out 80s/90s/00s. I also love scene/pop-punk playlists.

13. lanyard or key ring? Key Ring

14. favorite non-chocolate candy? Message Hearts (or anything with that texture), the red pack of starbursts (the UK version is vegan). Does Turkish Delight count because if so then that is my fave. I also like gummies if they’re vegan.

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment? To Kill a Mockingbird (high school), or The Bloody Chamber (uni), or Hamlet (uni)

16. most comfortable position to sit in? One foot under me, the other foot out to the other side, but both in the same position (if the surface is flat), or knees up.

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes? I own a lot of shoes so there isn’t really a single pair I wear the most. Recently my Air Force 1s, I’m trying to wear them in because the previous owner didn’t so the cause blisters.

18. ideal weather? Cold, overcast, rainy, still. Or without the rain. or snow (as long as I’m not going in the car and I can go crunch my shoes in it xD

19. sleeping position? Either side, but my body is kinda rotated towards the bed so it’s like half way between on my stomach and on my side. 

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? Notebooks

21. obsession from childhood? Animals, dinosaurs, goddesses, magic, crystals, neopets, sims. I still love all of these things, I am a rotating door of obsessions, usually a bunch of the same obsessions on repeat.

22. role model? I don’t have one particular role model, I do have tons of people that I love and respect.

23. strange habits? I have so many strange habits that I have become one myself. Nothing actually stands out though because 99% of it is because of my brain.

24. favorite crystal? rose quartz or moonstone.

25. first song you remember hearing? Maybe Dancing Queen by ABBA, definitely the first I remember dancing to, but my dad loves music so I grew up with a constant stream of it.

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather? Suffer xD when I’m able to do so comfortably I’d love to go out looking for pretty stones, and nice sticks with my fiance, also would like to go on picnics with him, or a friend if I had one.

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather? Baking, drawing, crafts, standing in the rain. Everything.

28. five songs to describe you? 6/10 - Dodie Robert Frost - Mal Blum Caught in the Middle - Paramore Side Effects - Jade Bird Snitches Get Stitches - Onsind  Bonus track: The Seed - Aurora I wish I still had the playlist I made of songs I relate to, several of these were on it though.

29. best way to bond with you? Oversharing, or telling me about things you’re into.

30. places that you find sacred? Nature. My favourite spots are little creeks/rivers in wooded areas, but just like, all of it is special and should be treated as such. Also bedrooms.

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? I think maybe I’m not gutsy or whatever enough, but also unpredictable. I wear whatever I like, and I’m just as likely to cry in all of them as I am to accidentally get in a fight.

32. top favorite vines? I feel so basic because I never really did the vine thing.  There was one that nearly killed me because I literally started to choke that was in some kind of office and the bit like can you run this past me again, and they just fucking legged it past them holding a folder up, Saw it once, never saw it again. Road work ahead. Why you can’t lift a house (might be a tok?) Brass dad and oven kid Look at this graaaaph Never learned how to read I can’t sit I have hemorrhoids The one with the people in blankets bobbing the nana nanana song Fr esh avo ca do Look at all these chickens

33. most used phrase in your phone? I love you - if I had to guess

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head? right now, nothing. I often get the old Super Liquor jingle lodged in there though.

35. average time you fall asleep? 6am?

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing? Charlie the unicorn or that one Noodles video by Cyanide and Happiness. Are those even memes?

37. suitcase or duffel bag? Depends. I mostly use a bag though since I never go anywhere for long.

38. lemonade or tea? Tea? Usually if you ask for lemonade here you get Sprite which is not lemonade.

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? I had a vegan lemon meringue pie once, so good. Cake is easier to make though, and I can eat more in one sitting without getting sick xD

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Um, the principal in my last year of school got caught for being a peeping tom a few years after I left.

41. last person you texted? My Fiance.

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Depends on the rest of the outfit and the weather. I wear Jean jackets most though.

44. favorite scent for soap? I love lavender, or vanilla/candy/fruity/baked goods type scents. I still have a bottle of Sugar Fairy spray from lush from a year ago and I love the smell of that.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy I think.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Nekkid?

47. favorite type of cheese? As a kid it was feta. Now I only eat vegan cheese. I was never a huge cheese fan tbh.

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be? Rotten xD um probably a cranberry or something because I’m small, and I’m not a fan of cranberry.

49. what saying or quote do you live by? An it harm none do what you will. Or treat others as you wish to be treated.

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have? Probably one of the vines I listed above, either “run it past” or “can’t lift a house” because both of those resulted in crying and choking.

51. current stresses? My cat has been throwing up and having diarrhoea the past week or so, she’s been to the vet, it got better for a bit, but tonight suddenly got worse. Living with my parents who I have a very toxic relationship with. Living in a single very overfilled room. Trying to not spend money so that I can save up to move next year. Nightmares about my trauma. Either the house is haunted or there’s a build up of negative energy (probably that).

52. favorite font? I always liked the look of all of the script style fonts (freestyle, french, lucida, lucida calligraphy, Edwardian, Palace) but they’re not accessible so for anything people will actually see (which is literally nothing) I always go with arial.

53. what is the current state of your hands? Slight rash on one finger because I’m sensitive to what is in a lot of hand washing products apparently (never an issue until the pandemic), one broken finger nail that is a bit shorter than the rest. Not painted nails because energy. I always wear my engagement ring, usually I wear several other rings but with how my skin is being I thought I’d better not for a while.

54. what did you learn from your first job? Bakeries are hell, my circadian rhythm will not adjust to anything besides its natural state for longer than a couple of days at a time no matter how long or hard I try. I can absolutely fall asleep standing up.

55. favorite fairy tale? Ugly Duckling

56. favorite tradition? I don’t have anyway... Yet? Hopefully when I move this can become a thing.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? I’m interpretting overcome loosely here, meaning “I have not died from this” - Suicide of my first love - Bullying - 3 different jobs that all nearly killed me

58. four talents you’re proud of having? Literally can’t think of one. I’m not talented. I’m passable at a couple of things, but I worked for those things and I’m still not good enough for anyone to confuse me for being talented xD Those things I care about that I’ve worked on a lot are singing, art, languages, crafts? I still struggled to come up with 4. My bad.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Aw jeez xD

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? Magical Girl! This is an easy one, give me the powers and the clothes yessss.

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? Literally sitting here drawing a blank, so instead of favourite here is the first one that came into my head “eyes are the genitals of the head” (may have that wrong, I’m watching the Office for the first time rn)

62. seven characters you relate to? Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Amelie from Amelie Matilda from Matilda Quasimodo from the Hunchback of Notredame (also my favourite plush as a kid) Iris - The Holiday Jess - New Girl Amelia Shepherd - Grey’s Anatomy Struggled with this because suddenly I drew a blank and also couldn’t remember who my Fiance was talking about every time he’s watched a character and said “that’s you” repeatedly.

63. five songs that would play in your club? Starlight - Superman Lovers Pump It - Black Eyed Peas I Bet that You Look Good on the Dancefloor - Arctic Monkeys All the Things She Said - tATu Doctor Jones - Aqua Bonus: Push Up - Freestylers These are ones  I have memories of dancing to when I was younger so that’s how I picked, but I’d absolutely be a themed night club with different music on different nights.

64. favorite website from your childhood? Neopets, which I still play daily. The first I played was MaMaMedia, then Bubblegum Club.

65. any permanent scars? That’s a SORE subject heh get it heh

66. favorite flower(s)? Lavender, rose, peony

67. good luck charms? I usually carry gemstones if I’m needing to be particularly lucky, or sigils.

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? I hate anything spicy. I had rootbeer candy that tasted like literal dirt. I can’t eat banana stuff without gagging and getting a headache. I hate anything that is artificial blackberry or blackcurrant, tastes like shitty cough syrup.

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? Sea Monkeys breathe through their feet, but I remember where I learned that.

70. left or right handed? right

71. least favorite pattern? depends entirely on the colours, I like patterns. but certain stripes do make my eyes feel funny.

72. worst subject? If PE counts, then that. If not, math.

73. favorite weird flavor combo? I love pineapple on pizza but that’s not weird. Iused to eat cheese and jam sandwiches as a kid though.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? I operate on how long it has lasted instead of how bad it is, essentially I get so desperate so I’ll try it even though it probably won’t help. I have the resistance of a rhino to most meds.

75. when did you lose your first tooth? No idea, like 4 I think? I did keep them in a weird little box for no reason though because they never got taken away from under my pillow.

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? I’m a fan of a good mash if it has lots of flavour (like gravy). Otherwise, crisps or fries.

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill? I grew a radish once! Something cat safe though these days, also maybe something heavy, and hard to knock over?

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Grocery Store sushi, if it’s just veg.

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? My only ID is my passport, and it is BAD.

80. earth tones or jewel tones? Both.

81. fireflies or lightning bugs? Fireflies (ten million of them to be precise)

82. pc or console? Grew up with PC. Now play my switch mostly.

83. writing or drawing? Both. Wrote more as a kid, draw more now.

84. podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts.

84. barbie or polly pocket? Both. But I prefered pollies as a kid

85. fairy tales or mythology? mythology

86. cookies or cupcakes? cupcakes

87. your greatest fear? Based on my nightmares, stairs.

88. your greatest wish? To live in a comfy house, in the country, with my Fiance, I have travelled the world, we have pets, I can function, we are free.

89. who would you put before everyone else? My Fiance and out animals.

90. luckiest mistake? Can’t think of any, most of my mistakes have been more like bad choices, also never turned out well for me.

91. boxes or bags? Depends what it’s for?

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? lamps, or fairy lights. Unless I’m particularly anxious, then overheads.

93. nicknames? None.

94. favorite season? Winter

95. favorite app on your phone? LINE, it has my fiance, and animated stickers.

96. desktop background? Little Twin Stars

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized? My own.

I never get asks and needed to distract myself so I’m going to just answer these anyway, like a survey or something. Original post by tr33-g1rl 

[daltongraham]

My review of “Wonder Woman”

Major spoilers below. Also: significant critique, both pro and con. If this was the end-all be-all movie for you, don’t read, it might harsh your buzz, move along your dash and have an awesome day!

So, overall, I found this to be a pretty mediocre movie with major advances in female representation in an action movie.

Pros

- LOTS of screen time with just Wonder Woman. Tons of it. And damn her lips are so pretty, I just wanted to eat her up

- As said elsewhere, Steve Trevor being a male love interest. She rescues him from drowning with her massive strength. (And ugh, Chris Pine being all helpless...kink) She’s the one who constantly rescues him, to the point where he complains gently about it. So refreshing.

- The Steve nekkid scene. Aside from being super-yumscrumptious, it was a naked man in a movie where there were almost no boobie scenes if any (I don’t count her armor--I consider it modest enough for even my boob-allergic taste) I wish it had been a little more full frontal, but I really think a lot of choices in this movie were to keep it appropriate for little kids.

- It passed the Bechdel test, and not only for a sentence or two!

- There were lots and lots of women in the cast.

- One of the villains was a strong woman. (I would have liked to see a lot more of her, along with her origin story)

- Very interesting that the main weapon was poison gas, since the main horror of WWI was mustard gas. I thought this was a period-reasonable mechanism.

- Showing the horrors of WWI: I think the bridge scene was probably sufficient. My partner said that it really just glossed over how viciously bad WWI was, but we agreed that was another concession for kids. I would have liked a few more shells during the campfire scene, because we were in those fancy XD seats and they shook when the shells landed and it was cool and frightening and immersive.

- She’s a museum curator at the Louvre

- Seriously, she’s a fucking museum curator at the Louvre *bounces*

Cons

- OMG the plot line. It was your standard super-hero origin story/hero’s journey with the male serial numbers filed off. There was even Stan Lee’s trademark father-son issues (but obvy with mother-daughter) (yes I’m well aware this is DC and not Stan). Lots of violence, long tedious fight scenes, a ridiculously long ridiculously tedious fight scene at the end with the main villain. YAWN. Nothing but increasing violence in that. And my partner figured out who Ares was almost as soon as we saw him, so the whole bait-and-switch villain trope was lost on us because it was way too predictable. So much of this was predictable. And it’s a plot line that I’ve grown quite weary of. 

- I did not find Diana’s character at all compelling. I thought she was pretty two-dimensional--and she was the fucking lead. It was almost to the point where I found her expressions to be flat-affect. I did not find her complex; I did not have much sense of her inner thoughts or struggles. The whole “I’m going to solve this without killing”, which I gather is a big part of her comic character, was really buried. I found Steve Trevor’s character to be much more compelling--and he was not meant to be the damn focus.

- Ugh, the final fight scene with Ares. That was so tedious I’ll mention it again, and it’s keeping me from wanting to re-see it.

- The origin story portion really dragged for me. Maybe I’ve seen too many action/superhero movies and am used to a really fast pace, but it felt to me like it went on forever and didn’t have much interest in it. Let’s see more of her mom and their relationship! Let’s see more of her aunt than just fight practice! Let’s see some of the other women and how they relate to the one child! Let’s see a bit of adolescent angst!

- When the poison gas was released? And she went into the village? It was so thick you couldn’t see, and they showed 2 people lying on the ground. I found this scene to be very odd...there should have been bodies everywhere. I get that they’re aiming at kids but I think a few more bodies wouldn’t have gone amiss to make the point of the evil of the gas.

A very important movie

So to sum again, I just found it kind of too boring to go see again. Though I enjoyed it well enough and am glad my partner’s money helped to boost it to such a huge box office first weekend.

I think it is massively important to the fandom in showing fucking male-dominated Hollywood that there are female fans out here with plenty of disposable (or scraped-together) money who crave this kind of content. 

I am disappointed that it was written by 4 men. Really? You couldn’t find one woman who was good enough to help with the story or write the screenplay? It showed. I found it to be a very typical male-viewpoint story.

But. Whether or not it was a male viewpoint is somewhat mitigated by how many movies are lifted straight from comics, which in the superhero genre are, as I understand, almost exclusively male-created. And male or not, it was lazy writing. As I bitched earlier, it was your standard superhero plot with almost no variation. Movies can be so plot-plagiarized. I guess it’s super hard to come up with new stories. 

(*cough* “Search Results/You searched for: sherlock/109782 Found [AO3 search on 5 Jun 2017]” ...most of them having a wildly new take on the standard stories...how about you draw from fic you lazy movie writers).

What should they have done instead?

My partner and I talked about this extensively on the short ride home. Some ideas included:

- Have a showdown with Diana and Poison Lady where they are talking tensely alone in a room, and Poison Lady convinces Diana of the necessity of her cause, saving her people, minimizing loss of life, whatever...and Diana is convinced for a bit and something has to shake her out of it.

- Get rid of most of the fight scenes--if you have to have them, make them short. My partner, who is cis-male, is sick of extended fight scenes too. So there.

- Enrich the origin story as I mentioned above.

- Give Diana a lot more depth--have her run into a lot more complex issues than just the straightforward “No Man’s Land”--yeah i say fuck it, I’ma go there. Uh huh. That’s...pretty predictable. I want to see her doing things that are maybe confusing on the surface and turn out to be totally in line with her no-kill humans-are-basically-good approach. 

- Have more women in the story once they leave Amazon. A brave nurse in the trenches or in France? Village women stepping up to do what they can, maybe pulling people out of the line of fire? MAKE THE CHIEF A TOUGH WOMAN! The Chief was not in either army and therefore could totally have been a tough-as-nails take-no-shit woman.

- Make Ares a woman. What? Gasp! But didn’t they already fuck around with Greek mythology? Maybe that’s going too far. I guess.

- Another love scene buildup with Steve. Altho I guess the movie pacing might not account for that. 

I’m sure there’s more that one could come up with, probably if one thought about writing a fix-it fic. Which this one has not yet done. (Thought about, that is. Can’t write right now.) But it just really was not new and interesting, and I feel like whether or not it had woman writers, it still could have done with a non-standard traditionally-male-written storyline. And character development.

...So that’s my long take. If you read this far you are cool. Argue with me in the replies! (ending with a ? to allow for replies)?

[murfeelee]

Bang, Marry, or Kill: Disney Princes

I was organizing my downloads from @silsharkie84’s Disney uploads, and it got me thinking about a conversation I had with someone once about which Disney princes I’d Bang, Marry, or Kill.

And since I have nothing better to do with my life, I decided to make this post.

KILL

Let’s just get the annoying ones out of the way. I would totally kill, because these guys got on my g-d nerves:

10: John Smith (Pocahontas) - freaking bigot. Totally foreshadowed Mel Gibson’s racist-a** tirades. Not only that, but they completely romanticize his story and his FACE, cuz RL John Smith was NOT that fine. At all. I’d totally Marry John Rolfe though; I liked the sequel, I don’t care. At least Pocahontas actually married Rolfe IRL. I doubt she and troll-face Smith were banging IRL though. Unless he raped her, which wouldn’t surprise me. Anyway, he’s not even royalty! He and Pocahontas didn’t even stay together in the cartoon, why is he considered a Disney Prince, the hell?

9: Prince Charming (Cinderella) - the man was useless. His castle’s the most interesting thing about him -- and everyone calls it Cinderella’s Castle anyways, so nya-nya. Freaking tool. I mean, how are you so “in love“ with this chick, yet you don’t even BOTHER with asking her name, her address, her zodiac sign...NOTHING. A few dances and you know you don’t know the first thing about Cinderella, but you wanna marry her? Then you couldn’t even be effed to hunting her down yourself -- as if she’s the only wench in the kingdom who wears Size 6 shoes. Would’ve served him right if Lady Tremaine’s feet fit in them just fine! XP (I LOVE Shrek’s Prince Charming though! Totally Bang him! XD)

8: Naveen (Princess & the Frog) - jfc, I’d take Dr. Facilier over this guy; Keith David’s the best. Disney just HAD to go and make their first black human prince an idiot though. Yeah, Naveen’s hella pretty, but he’s broke, shiftless, a frikkin frog for a good chunk of the movie, and did I mention he’s an idiot? I see you, Disney. <_<

HONORABLE MENTION: Prince Hans (Frozen) - THIS SNAAAAAKE! Omg I did NOT see that coming! I would have MARRIED him! Omgomgomg; that was the best part of the whole show, next to that song people won’t let go of. (Pfft) I don’t like Kristoff at all, but THIS mofo...? KILL. On SIGHT. Before it’s too late!

Bang

7: Eugene (Tangled) - possibly the funniest and most fully realized prince (consort) Disney ever made. But the man’s a total clown. I could never take a guy like that seriously. I’M a total clown! I know clowns when I see them! We’d probably have some booze-induced romp and wake up hungover the next day, freak the eff out, and solemnly vow to NEVER mention what happened for as long as we both shall live, amen, pass the toothpaste.

6: Prince Eric (Little Mermaid) - Eric is actually the hottest Disney Prince -- MALE, Period -- I think they ever made. Totally swoon-worthy. And his castle is swaaanky~! But ISTG this Judas has zero sense, and is just as vapid as Prince Charming. You were barely conscious and this girl dragged your guppy butt out of the freaking ocean, and you barely got a good glimpse of her, but you’re ready to devote the rest of your useless life to finding her, rather than getting with the perfectly adorable (though albeit mute) chick WHO IS THE SAME REDHEAD YOU’RE LOOKING FOR YOU BLIND FOOL?!?! Omg spare me. Ursula/Vanessa didn’t even have red hair! So, yeah, he’s an idiot. But a hot one. 10/10, would do again.

5: Prince Ali/Aladdin (Aladdin) - if you’re gonna be a broke street rat, at least be the best street rat, y’know? Aladdin was probably the smartest Disney prince EVER. A bit of a liar, so we’d have to work on that “Do You Trust Me~~” shtick, but yeah. He just had a rough life (thanks to his jerkface SEXY BAMF daddy, Cassim, the King of Thieves, who I would immediately Bang, but not Marry, since Cassim ditched his wife to go treasure hunting and she died and Aladdin had to grow up an orphan all those years, the eff, frikkin scrub). But Aladdin’s freaking cute, so if I was some lonely street ratress I’d tap that. Even though I was squicked out when I heard that Disney based Aladdin’s face on Tom effing Cruise, which made me vomit a bit in my mouth. But yeah.

HONORABLE MENTION: Phoebus (Hunchback of Notre Dame) - He’s not a prince since Esmeralda’s not a princess, but he was hot, and up until Tangled I thought he was the funniest love interest Disney had. I loved his antics with his horse Achilles, and his general reactions to the shenanigans going on in that abysmally underrated show. I can’t decide if I’d just Bang him or Marry him, cuz he made me feel so bad for Quasimodo, who I would certainly Marry. But Phoebus is definitely getting Banged.

MARRY

4: The Prince (Ferdinand/Florian) (Snow White) - The original True Love’s Kiss. We know next to nothing about this dude and his magic lips, but you know what? The woodland animals liked him, and the dwarves liked him (and they hate everybody), and Snow White liked him, so I like him too. And he dressed really well, so he was probably loaded.

3: Prince Phillip (Sleeping Beauty) - I know Sleeping Beauty’s my favorite Disney film EVER, but Phil only barely gets a pass into my Top 3/4, and that’s mostly because 1: anyone who can defeat MY BISH Maleficent is a BAMF, and 2: I liked his scenes with his horse Samson -- which were interestingly enough lampshaded with Eugene and Maximus, AND Phoebus and Achilles -- I see you, Disney! But other than that I thought he was just alright. I didn’t hate him. And 3: I love his impromptu “duet” with Aurora in Once Upon a Dream; dude could sing.

2: The Beast/Prince Adam - I'm just gonna come out and say it: Is it just me, or was this dude sexier as The Beast than he was as a human? O_O

Awwww yeeeah.... I’m sorry, maybe I need to pray for my soul a little bit, but I’m just saying. Beauty and the Beast might just be the greatest Disney cartoon of all time, IMO. The Beast was freaking COOL, fighting packs of wolves and nonsense to save his bae. Also, his castle was THE BEST. Oh, so Cinderella’s castle has a ballroom -- EFF that wack-a** ballroom! The Beast’s was WAY better! It’s GOLD PLATED! He’s got enchanted servants on standby and feasts with FRENCH CHEFS and everything! Not to mention, it’s got a LIBRARY. AND there’s a dungeon. Talk about GRAVITAS. The Beast would totally go medieval on someone, I love it. Belle’s over there crying and mess. I’d be like HALLELUJAH, such a step up from Gaston~~! ^0^ The wild part is that apparently the whole story is supposed to symbolize arranged marriages, where the bride is terrified of her seemingly “beastly“ stranger of a husband, but over time gets to know him and realizes he’s not a complete and total douchelord. Just 75% douche and 25% lord. Which is way better than Gaston’s 100% doucheness, amirite.

HONORABLE MENTION: Kocoum (Pocahontas) - I kid you not, I rage-cried when Kocoum died. This SEXY HALF-NEKKID WARRIOR WITH TATTS OMFG TAKE ME NOOOW! Pocahontas was a complete IDIOT; I’d Marry his #FOINE behind and give him an effton of babies! Sexy warrior babies! *shrill battle cry* That was the most aggravating death ever, Disney. What a waste of good genes.

#1: LI SHANG (Mulan) - I would bite this man. I bought that crappy straight-to-video sequel just so I could keep staring at Li Shang, I’m not even lying. He was fully realized, hot as all get out, could kick the tastebuds out of the Huns, had THE BEST SONG Disney ever gave a dude, and I’m sure I said he was hot, right? Well, it bears repeating. Marry. Wed. Espoused. Eloped. Mated. Bonded. Holy Matrimony. SINFUL Matrimony. Everything. We’re doing it all! SIGN. ME. UP.

Lawd have all the mercy. Make whatever you frikkin want out of me, Shang! (*3*)/

So, how about y’all? Which cartoon characters are y’all pervving over?

[treason-and-plot]

REPLIES TO MIA AND COBY

@sims3hasstoppedworking replied to your post

She's used to it haahaha

@willky12

If I was a guy maybe that last statement would be a huge turn off, I'd like to think so :-/

@dandylion240

I think if I was Coby I'd be a little turned off by admitting Jackie is used to it.

Most guys would react like that. But Coby is very chill and non-judgmental. Another reason he’s such a great match for Mia!

@romeo-and-simulet

Coby's not really a strange man tho xD

No. He’s also very modest and unassuming. 

@pixelcurious

But does he cook breakfast?

I went to @caterpillarsims, Coby’s mama, to get the answer to this. Her reply:

So now we know! :D

@lilsisterg

Mia is so reckless .. I'm worried ...

@miraakles

Ugh. I mean. She's just a goddamn wreck so you know, Coby is just another piece of meat to me. Just another toy. Maybe he'll surprise me though and instead of have sex they'll watch movies all night and tell stories.

@karnzter

*Bad Reputation plays in the distance*

@blythelyre

You little slutbag... I'm kinda, not even lowkey, jealous.

@hyperkaos

Gods I so love that girl... lol

@holleyberry

At least she's honest.

@krazyangelkat81

She's an honest slut you gotta give her that. lol

@sweetnovember77

There is something settling about Coby questioning Jackie's comfort. A lot of guys wouldn't give a shit.

Coby is very sweet-natured. I’m glad I was able to convey that and that you noticed it! 

@blythelyre

He's such a sweetheart!

@sims3hasstoppedworking replied to your post

That position in the third picture tho!

@sims3hasstoppedworking

Are they fucking or trying to join circus acrobats team smh lmao

Meh I did that one three times this morning before breakfast. It required quite a bit of Windex afterwards though!

@gaiahypothesims

High Praise from Mia. His all night fucking has me wondering ... wouldn't the latex start to chafe? AND would you have to be switching condoms out every so many hours... positions? Hmmmph so many questions.

Well you might have noticed that there were a lot of condoms on the floor next to Mia, so you can assume they were replacing them quite frequently, and she is also a big fan of Replens ™, a silicone-based lube made to combat vaginal dryness- it’s great for vaginal sex and it also moisturizes the vaginal tissue! If you use enough Replens or any other silicone or water based lubricant the chafing can be kept to a minimum. Wetness is key!

@hyperkaos

"Birds, fucking birds" lmao Mia's amazement makes me giggle...

@krazyangelkat81

She's finally found someone who can outlast her appetite.

@wannabecatwriter

If Mia says so, it must be true, lol! I mean, she has had a lot of people to compare with. Get it, Mia and Coby!

@miraakles

Her vagina is gonna be sore... Unless she's just manage to just force her body to deal with her sex drive.... Goddamn Mia. And you know what, where the hell did JACKIE spend the night?

Well, as long as you use enough lubricant you should be alright. Sex workers can service many, many clients in a single night and are still able to work the next day with no problem at all. I would imagine that indulging in a bit of variety and not just having vaginal sex for hours on end would help as well. 

Jackie actually spent a large portion of the night canoodling by the pool with Milo but came home alone. And no, they didn’t do the deed. Jackie believes in taking things slow!

@simlicious

Mia really needs to have a softer carpet in her room :)

LMBO!!! I think that is one of the few rooms in my game that isn’t furnished with one of your silky-soft carpets! Watch out for Mia’s knees in the next update ;=)

@sweetnovember77

Hilarious. I like Coby. He gives me an amusingly clever in execution vibe.

@justanothersimsblog replied to your post

oh hey, they got dressed

@hyperkaos

octopussy swim trunks... so was the final count 8?

@blythelyre

are they nekkid in the water??

@gaiahypothesims

If I didn't think that Coby belonged to Stiane I would ship it hard.

@miraakles

See that right there? Notice that his dick didn't heal your wounds Mia. Jeez! Better get some help now before you end up like Anita! This is good life advice sweetie, trust me!

@roseoakmoonsims​

Someday I really hope Mia wakes up enough to understand that that hole in her heart causing her so much trouble isn't fixed by filling the lower one. Gonna have to face it all truthfully if she ever wants to stop feeling so empty.

@sweetnovember77

I like how they both agreed to tiptoe outta the house and into the ocean. Reminds me of the good old days before social media. More folks were spontaneous, and would create big memories out of the smallest moments.

IKR? One of the reasons I love Mia and Coby together is because they are both spontaneous, and have no hidden agendas at all. I think another good word to describe the two of them is ingenuous, ‘ free from pretension or calculation, lacking artificiality and self-consciousness.’ I think a skinny-dip in the ocean at sunrise after an all-night sex session is totally befitting their characters!