#even with [waves at my life] all of the fuckening

[altschmerzes]

I hope you don’t mind me asking but I was just wondering what relationships Jamie will have with Roy and Keeley in your baby Jamie story. Something I’ve really enjoyed in your other fics like The Same Story, and your most recent fic is the amazing friendship Jamie has with them. Obviously a lot of things are different in your upcoming fic, and their history with Jamie is going to be vastly different, so I was really curious.

i don't mind at all!! i love love love talking about this fic and this is one of the like. central components of it and one of the parts that's most fascinating to me to think about and poke at, roy particularly.

roy and he have the same antagonism that they do when we meet them in canon though it looks obviously very different because of the fact that yknow. jamie's fifteen and not on the team so roy is MUCH less aggressive/actively beefing with a teenager lmao but they do sort of..... roy is endlessly frustrated with jamie's attitude and the fact that jamie seems to, from minute one, hate his guts for absolutely no reason at all. it evolves over time as the story progresses from this kind of frustrated, baffled resentment to roy somehow now TWICE OVER landing in a situation where he is sort of parenting someone else's kid with them without really meaning to, that's just how it happened.

there's phoebe, who he's fulfilling a very directly parental role with (and as somebody who usually means 'mother and grandmother' when i say 'my parents' i loved seeing this on screen. he's not her dad but he is very much a parent to her) and then there's the way that he and ted end up sort of coparenting jamie together by the time they get him out of his dad's house. it's like..... it's complicated and not very clear cut, because while ted is very much Jamie's Dad at this point roy is like..... he's not jamie's dad but he is A Parent, much in the way he is with phoebe which is a very fun like. family dynamic to explore in all directions (roy and ted and jamie as a collective, what this does for roy and ted's relationship, the relationship jamie ends up having with roy's sister (who i'm once again calling sarah sdlfs) and phoebe).

(there's also some complex stuff in there about the way that i've adapted some canon events - including the city win over richmond in 1x10 which jamie still plays a key role in and roy's retirement and refusal to coach jamie when he came back which, jamie's not on the team but that Situation still manifests in a way)

and with keeley it's obviously EXTREMELY different since they are not, never will be, and do not even come close to being involved romantically or sexually, gd bless. absolutely not. so we, and jamie, are introduced to her as the girlfriend of the richmond captain prior to roy, a very briefly appearing man i've dubbed leo charles. and then she's around richmond doing PR because of the job rebecca gives her, which is when she and jamie start interacting more. and the relationship they have - which again i feel i must stress because you know how fandoms are lmao is completely platonic at every point - is a very important one to jamie because she like....... treats him like a person, not like a child. she asks for his opinion on things and actually listens, she has a respect for him and his thoughts that he hasn't seen a lot.

and compared to the others too there's this sense, even when those relationships improve, with ted and roy and company, that they feel like he's someone they need to protect and care for, which is true! they do! and keeley is protective of him as well, is aware he's young and has been badly hurt and needs looking out for, but that's not the role SHE directly has in his life so she's like. someone who he doesn't feel like thinks he needs minding, or whatever, she's someone he can go to if he needs to feel Normal and go check out the new hipster coffee shop that's opened in the area or give an opinion on an outfit or something. he admires her and thinks she's probably the coolest person alive, pretty much.

[mavrintarou]

[3:45PM] Suna Rintarou (prequel of DD) [3]

I started a part-time job so my writing and posting will slow down tremendously. Hopefully, I'll get inspired lol. If you are new, this is the 3 part, please go back and read the initial post, and prequel - parts 1, and 2. You can find those chapters here

Warning: none, angst/hurt & leading to comfort Note: There is a time jump, hopefully, I don't confuse you guys

Prequel (part 2)

.

Rin realized he found himself watching Y/n sleep more often than usual. He never understood romantic films where the man watches the girl sleep, often thinking how creepy they were.

He didn’t care that at the moment he was doing the same thing, watching Y/n sleep like a little creeper. All that mattered to him was seeing Y/n asleep beside him safe and sound.

Rin still could not believe the wild roller coaster he and about 300 other passengers went through less than 72 hours ago.

It was one thing to be surprised to discover that Y/n was the pilot of the plane he was flying to Thailand for a tournament.

Four months ago, he would have waved at her like a hopeless romance and shown everyone they were lovers.

But it has been four months since Rintarou broke everything off with Y/n.

Everything has been a mess since that day and nothing was going right.

With each ticking second his conscience questions whether he made the right decision. Was it impulsive or was he right?

All he wanted was to make them official, he wanted the right to call her his girlfriend and show her off. He also wanted her to take him home to her place.

He wanted a home with her.

But he got the sense she didn’t want to share much of her life with him. 

He began questioning her about when she would cancel plans or tell him she would no longer be coming home that day and be gone for days on end without communication.

He respected her busy career and work schedule, but he couldn’t help but feel left out of her life.

They had been seeing each other for almost four months, he was ready for the next phase and thought they were both on the same page.

When he initiated and asked her to be his girlfriend, she did not consider his request, immediately turning him down.

“I’m sorry… I can’t… I thought you understood, Rin?”

Like a light switch, anger consumed him. He threw the comforters off and stalked naked around his room to search for his boxers. “Understood?” he mimicked her tone, he wiped towards her with hurt and pain written on his face. “What is there to understand when you don’t tell me anything?”

“What do you mean? I tell you when I’m done with work, I make time on my off days to meet with you. What is it, Rin? What is it that you want?” Y/n kept her voice leveled, not wanting to meet his energy.

“I want you!” he shouted, throwing his hands up, “I want you to be mine, Y/n.” He inhaled sharply, “I want everything there is out there to want. I want to know where you are at all times because I can’t help but be anxious you might be with someone else when you are not with me. I want to know what you are thinking about and if I even cross your mind at all because you are always on mine. I want to tell every damn hot-blooded male out there you are mine, fuck – even the women too because you’re fucken amazing.” His breath shook as he slowly took a deep breath. “I want to not have this terrible feeling that I’m not good enough for you…” he choked, “I feel like I’m being childish, wanting you to only look my way, wanting you to only want me… want you in every way possible. But I feel like it’s one-sided…”

He felt foolish pouring out his childish feelings. He couldn’t even look at her at this point.

To make matters worse, Y/n hadn’t spoken a word. She had not attempted at all to assure him that she too wanted him.

“I think we should end this, it is obvious you do not feel the same way for me,” he muttered, “please see your way out.” He turned his heels and headed straight to his bathroom.

When he came out after a hot bath almost an hour later, she was gone, every trace of her gone.

He stared out the air plane window, zoning out until something was held in front of him, a paper bag.

“Our captain has asked me to deliver this to you.” The young flight attendants informed with a smile.

Rin accepted it and opened the bag.

It was snacks he and Y/n enjoyed eating together. At the bottom of the bag was a piece of paper inside.

I hope you have been well.

He shut his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

He missed her dearly.

Reaching for his bag, he began searching for stuff he could give back to Y/n. “Excuse me,” he called the flight attendant, “do you have pen and paper?” She returned with the items he requested.

As he was about to signal the flight attendant again, the plane suddenly jerked and trembled violently before it suddenly veering sharply to the left, causing standing passengers to lose their balance.

Y/n’s voice came over the intercom with a vague announcement, immediately ordering all passengers to fasten their seatbelts.

Rin could not mistake the uneasiness in her tone and nor did he miss the looks on the flight attendants' faces as they quickly shuffled around, making sure all passengers followed the announcement.  

Quickly fastening his seatbelt, unknowingly holding his breath.

Talk to me Y/n, Rin silently prayed to himself.

No one could have anticipated encountering a situation typically happening only in films. The lights inside the plane started flickering, and the aircraft continued to sway as if struggling to remain airborne. This prompts passengers to demand an explanation.

Rin looked down at his watch and began counting.

It was the longest five minutes of his life before he heard Y/n’s voice.

“This is your pilot Y/n, we will be making an emergency landing shortly here in Singapore, please remain seated and keep your seat belt fastened until further notice.”

Thirty minutes later, the plane landed on the tarmac and moved towards the many flashing vehicles.

At last, an announcement was made, except this time it was not Y/n’s voice. “This is your co-captain speaking, I sincerely apologize for the sudden change and inconvenience. There has been an emergency medical situation and I ask everyone to please remain seated until further notice. Another announcement will be made as soon as you can exit the aircraft, there will be gate agents ready to assist and get you on the next flight to Thailand.”

Outside of the aircraft ambulances and other medical services were waiting outside.

Rin’s eyes widen as he catches a glimpse of Y/n rushing alongside the stretcher that is being hauled into an ambulance.

.

Rin and his team boarded the next flight to Thailand. His mind remained clouded and hazy as he awaited Y/n’s text response, any response from her. During the game, he found himself sidelined for most of it, as his coached noticed his lack of mental focus. The moment EJP Raijin was declared champions, Rin rushed to the locker room to check his phone.

He has never been so relieved to see her name on his screen.

I’m in Thailand at XXX Hotel. Dinner?

.

“Usually, on long flights lasting 6 hours or more, there are three pilots, but this time, there were four due to the larger aircraft. It was my co-pilot’s and my turn to swap and rest. Thirty minutes after falling asleep, I heard him call my name, gasping that he was experiencing chest pains,” Y/n recounted, rubbing her face with her hand as she relived the moment. “He was having a cardiac arrest,” Y/n pushed the food on her plate around, not having much of an appetite. She described how she administered CPR to her colleague while simultaneously giving commands to the other pilot to request an emergency landing. “An as if that wasn’t challenging enough, we flew into a flock of birds that caused one of our engines to blow out,” Y/n explained, her expression reflecting extreme fatigue as she recount the situation on the plane. “The plane got out of control so I had to quickly switch and gain control in the air until we landed in Singapore.” She smiled tiredly at Rin, “he’s okay if you’re wondering.”

“That’s good, but are you okay?” Rin cared more for her well-being than the others. He too lost his appetite, pushing his food around. He reached for her hand and laced their fingers. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m just… exhausted. It’s been a long four months…” she tightened her fingers around his. “Long four months of training and… without you.”

Rin could only maintain eye contact with her in silence before softly inquiring, “what are you trying to say…?”

“I’m saying that I have missed you, Rintarou. I have missed you every single day,” Y/n answered earnestly.

A deep sigh escaped from his lips, as though he had been holding it in for quite some time before they curved into a smile. “I missed you too,” he admitted.

.

In the brief period he’s known her, she has consistently been a sound sleeper, likely due to her hectic work routine.

But at this moment, he could tell she was deeply asleep as she didn’t stir when he shifted himself so he could hold her. His heart rate eased as she nestled closer into his warmth. The tip of her nose pressed lightly against his nipple, erecting his nub as she unconsciously rubbed against it.

He hist softly, cursing silently in his head. Counting backward from one hundred, he distracts his mind with other thoughts to distract himself.

He found it hard to grasp the reality of her presence beside him. After dinner, there was no way he was going to part from her.

He held on to the end of her shirt like a lost puppy, “stay with me.”

Y/n reached for his hand, holding it tightly, “I’m so tired, I’m ready to fall asleep on my feet.”

“Your place or mine, I don’t care, your call.” Rin stepped closer and cupped her cheek, “I just want to be wherever you are.”

They came back to hers. Rin noticed her small luggage and a handful of her belongings spread out on the desk.

Y/n began stripping her clothes off, leaving only her panties and sports bra on. Rin could feel his face heat up as he turned away.

“I’m just getting comfortable, don’t worry I won’t take advantage of you,” she teased, slipping into the bed. “Are you going to stand there all day or are you going to get in?”

He stripped down to his boxers briefs and slipped in, he might as well get comfortable with her too.

“Are you afraid I’ll bite you? Why are you so far away from me? Are you lying about missing me?”

Y/n was tugged into Rin’s arm as they tightly locked around her. “I would lie about many things but missing you isn’t one of them.” He pressed his lips to her forehead, “sleep, you can barely keep your eyes open.”

“Rin.”

He hummed watching her close her eyes before she whispered, “I like you.”

Minutes later, her breathing steadied, and she relaxed in his embrace. Rin couldn’t pinpoint when he started noticing the small intricacies about her. Like the tiny beauty mark at the outer corner of her left eye, or how her green eyes occasionally shifted to yellow in the sunlight. He observed how her eyes crinkled when she smiled widely and how she would quickly use a hand to cover her smile. He longed to reach out and smooth the wrinkles on her forehead when she was deeply focused on something.

He found himself missing her every second of the day whenever she wasn’t by his side, and every little thing seemed to remind him of her. Whether it was spotting someone with the same shade of green eyes or hearing or seeing an airplane in the sky, thoughts of Y/n would flood his mind.

Every little thing about Y/n came down to one thing, he was hopelessly in love with her.

.

For the past five minutes, Y/n had been observing the man sleeping beside her. She couldn’t help but notice the dark circles under his eyes and how he seemed to have lost weight, his cheeks appearing sunken.

She had noticed her weight loss and general disinterest since their fallout, believing she was the only one suffering. As her fingers lightly brushed his bangs aside, she pondered whether he, too, might have been enduring similar struggles.

After she left his place that day, regret weighed heavily in her heart ever since. She has never felt rejected and hurt as much as Rin telling her to leave his place.

She distracted herself with work, taking on additional shifts until one day she was greeted by someone she least expected, her old boss, the Chief Master Sergeant of the Air Specialty Force.

“We need you to come back,” was the first thing he said. “We have a project and you are the only one who can lead it and carry it out.”

Pursuing aviation had always been Y/n’s passion and dream, so joining the military straight out of school seemed like the optimal choice for her. In a sense, she was achieving two goals at once: pursuing her passion while also upholding the long-standing family tradition of military service spanning decades.  

A year ago, she would have eagerly accepted the mission, always eager for a fresh challenge. But now, she found herself struggling to find her voice. Accepting the mission meant being away for an extended period – ranging from at least six months to two years or more.

Y/n couldn’t understand why she was hesitating.

A part of her was her pride.

She is reminded of a painful past incident that had her dismissed with an uncharacterized discharge. After she returned to the civilian world, she was pulled into commercial aviation to maintain a part of her passion.

But that wasn’t it either.

At last, Rin’s face came to her mind.

Everything has changed since she met Rin.  

He was only meant to be a distraction. Their relationship was never meant to have gone this far or deep.

She wasn’t supposed to care for him, let alone, formed a bond with him.

Her time in the military and her specialized field compelled her to prioritize her duty over settling down, understanding that investing in something that might only lead to heartbreak was not in her best interest. Even in her current time, she was always on the go, never settling in one spot for long, she was convinced a relationship wouldn’t survive if one partner was always gone.

This is why she steered clear of committing to a relationship or remaining attached to someone for an extended duration.

Y/n had refused to acknowledge her feelings for Rintarou. She viewed their interactions as mere entertainment whenever she was back at home. She enjoyed his pursuit and the undivided attention he gave her. She has never had anyone give her as much attention as Rin had. At first, she believed it was because he was younger than her and was infatuated with the thought of chasing and finding interest in an older woman.

However, as they spent more time together, the hours slipping by unnoticed, she gradually found herself caving into him, basking in the warmth of his arms and feeling her heart beat in sync with his.

She had never yearned for someone’s company as intensely as she did for his. Simply being in his presence was sufficient to make her feel at ease and rejuvenate. He filled a void in her life that she hadn’t realized existed.

Her heart and mind started yearning for every detail about him. In a crowded place, she’d catch a glimpse of men similar in height, instantly reminded of him. The sight of the color yellow would remind her of his eyes that glowed whenever they locked with hers. She began following his volleyball team to stay on top of updates about him and his professional life.

She thought she was the only one who was feeling these aftereffects.

Therefore, it was a hasty choice on her part to accept the mission, driven by the desire to distract herself from him and put physical distance between them.

She was simply a coward who was hopelessly in love with him.

. . .

E/n: I'm happy to explain anything you might be confused about, or hopefully my next part will explain/answer it.

>>> @queenelleee @mfreedomstuff @erintaro @callmeraider @chaotic-fangirl-blog @wolffmaiden @cloud-lyy

[gnrbitch]

Grunge Days pt.19 - Big Dumb Sex

Warnings: a little smut

————

1992, New York

“You fucked my life up” Y/n said as she pressed her lips back onto Slash’s “Yet you’re the only one who could make it all better” She whispered as she left kissed all along his jawline.

Neither Slash nor Y/n thought that they would ever feel their bodies pressed against one another’s again, but here they were.

A few moments ago…

“Not it the mood Jer, i’m gonna call it a night” Y/n said as her and Jerry stood outside the venue they played in.

Alice had starting doing some shows to start promoting their second record, this was barley their second stop.

“Alright i’ll see you in the morning” Jerry said “Love you!” He yelled as Y/n walked to a cab.

Y/n smiled to him, waving her hand. She sighed as she rolled the window back up, resting her head on it.

“Rough night?” The cab driver asked

Y/n let out a tired laugh, “Rough life” she said.

The driver nodded his head “Where are you going?”

“The Marriott” She said

The rest of the drive was quiet, she told him goodbye and paid him, then she walked to her room. Y/n was finally glad to be alone, shrugging off her jacket into her bed, pulling out her shit to shoot up.

The girl coughed as she tied her arm up, moving one of her hands up to rub her throat.

The bruise from the incident was already starting to fade, but Duffs hand marks were still pretty noticeable. But Y/ns voice was still rough from what happened, so her vocals were all over the place.

Y/n was sprawled out on her bed, trying not to move or think. But the only thing that kept creeping up in her mind was how long it had been since she last had slept with someone. Her life was horrible right now, but maybe she just needed to get laid.

She closed her eyes, getting ready to finally fall asleep. That was until her door bell rung. Y/n squeezed her eyes shut, silently cursing as she got up and walked over to her door, not even checking to see who it was, she just opened it.

“Oh my fucken god” Y/n groaned as she saw Slash “What could you possibly fucken want?” She asked, annoyed.

“I was in the neighborhood” Slash shrugged, “Thought i should come see how you’re doing” He said, his eyes narrowing to her throat.

Y/n rolled her eyes as she slammed the door in his face, turning back around and only taking three steps before turning back around, walking to the door and opening it. Fuck it, she thought, i don’t think he could ruin my life anymore than he already has.

“Knew you’d come back” Slash smiled

Y/n sent him a obvious fake smile, then dragged him into her room. The minute she turned to close the door, his lips found their way onto hers.

And what kind of self control does Y/n have? We’ve learned that obviously, she has none.

They moved their bodies onto the couch that was in the room, Y/ns body on top of his.

Slash pulled away to look at Y/ns face, being unable to believe that it’s really her. “Y/n” he breathlessly said, Y/n cutting him off.

“You fucked my life up” Y/n said as she pressed her lips back onto Slash’s “Yet you’re the only one who could make it all better” She whispered as she left kissed all along his jawline.

Slash’s hands went to Y/ns hips, grinding her into his covered up dick. The pair practically tore off their clothes.

“I thought i was never gonna feel you again” He whispered, admiring her body, and her face.

Y/n sunk down onto him, throwing her head back as she moaned. She looked back at him, his mouth agape, “You don’t deserve to”.

The rest was really all a blur to Y/n, a very sleazy blur. She ignored the way Slash kept apologizing to her, and really she ignored everything thay Slash said.

All she knew was that for the first time in what felt like forever, she felt good. And she knew she wasn’t gonna regret this, cause holy shit did she feel good.

Slash held onto Y/n once he finished, breathing into Y/ns neck.

But Y/n wasn’t about to do none of the cuddling, so she removed his arms off of her body and stood up, putting her underwear and long sleeve shirt.

Slash furrowed his eyebrows, but not moving off of the couch. Y/n lit up a cigarette, picked her pants up from off of the floor, and started to walk to her bedroom.

Slash’s eyes followed her every move, “What does this mean?” he asked, what does this mean for us? He thought

Y/n turned to look at him, a petty smile on her face “It means get the fuck out of my room” She said, turning back around and walking into her bedroom, slamming the door shut.

————

Sorry the smut wasn’t good like at all i lowkey did not feel like writing it😭😭

Tagged: @deeznutsworld @killazilla777 @hoodiesandicedcoffee @eddiiiieeee @kirksfunkopop

[eldritch-spouse]

Just read that one post on how to REALLY escape from Breg and YIKES the hurt on that one. Like, the dudes getting captured and taken back to the same hell hole he escaped from begging and pleading for YOUR help only to see you just. There. With the other staff. LIKE MY GOD. Dude when i read that i was like YIKESS. That musta stung. Bad.

Like I remember reading another post bout what would happen if Breg was recaptured and how he literally killed himself while thinking of you and how happy he was that he met you and managed to live his life. I’m gonna give props to you cause you ended that post PERFECTLY. How in his final moments he’s thinking of how beautiful you are and how lucky that is like thats fucking heartbreaking.

So imagine when he was getting recaptured, he fucking sees you just talkin to the staff so calmly and the real choker is how you look so… relieved? Like I can’t say this enough but OUCH. Can’t tell what his reaction would be but it’s hurt. A lot of hurt. Like I’m sure he’d be too sad and heartbroken and betrayed to be angry. Maybe angry later, But now? In disbelief and is absolutely devastated. Like all this time you were lying, faking everything? When he thought you loved him when really you just put up with him hoping for the day to get rid of him.

That’s so fucken awful. Cause like ya said (i think) he’d rather die than go back to the facility. So no doubt he’s gonna off himself again all while thinking of what you did. Like god that’s a real stinker. Can’t imagine how that felt. Mans gonna be a whole explosion of emotions, Too overwhelmed to handle it all because he’s just thinking of you you you.

Overall, Props to you. You really know how to write some angsty shit. Like genuinely you write really well done! Because truthfully I’ve been binging to Yer Breg tag and i loved him and all your posts! Can’t wait to get a start on your other works, Got my eye on Morell so i might check him out later lol

Ah, this post and this one.

TW: Heavy angst, mentions of murder and suicide.

It would take so long for him to process it, it really would. One moment, his brain starts trying to close that bubble all over again, trying to erase these last few parts of your relationship and pretend that you really did love him, that what you had was real and beautiful- But then, then this wave of endless fury just consumes him, and the need to kill you keeps rising.

If Breg ever got his hands on you, it would be the ugliest scene imaginable. He's sick over the fact that he can't stop craving your love yet knows what a piece of shit you really are- There's a good chance he'd fuck you to death. Fortunately, he's never making it out again. Count your blessings. And thanks to his initial outbursts courtesy of your betrayal, he'll probably remain restrained all the time, so he can't hurt anyone including himself. Suicide isn't an option anymore.

Not without his teeth, with a stump of tail, declawed and perpetually chained to the wall even inside his own isolated cell. Swallowing your own tongue is a lot harder than it looks, you know? His days are spent wailing, haunted by visions of you even as those hellish fucking pumps drain his cocks for hours at a time. If he had the opportunity to see the other groups of captive breeders, subject M197 would let himself fall to the floor and wait for them to viciously tear him apart, but he knows he'll never be given that mercy.

Even if Breg has dreams of dragging your open skull through miles of asphalt-

At the end of the day, he knows he'll do anything if it meant having you back, you finally accepting him. Everyday his body collects new scars and deformities from his futile attempts at fighting back, his sanity peels apart like rotten wallpaper, and he knows that if you didn't love him then you'll never love him now... But it's the only thing he sees when he spaces out anyway.

Because his brain won't move on, refuses to. Delusion has always been his cope, why would this be any different?

[Thenk! It's always been easier for me to write angst than fluff, I like keeping things dark :7. Morell is one of my favorites, hope you like that nutty fuck.]

[windalchemist001]

You know those moments where you wonder why life was just out to get you? Yeah this was one of the moments.

Honestly I was so tempted to turn my butt around and act like I didn't know a few idoits. Unfortunately that plain was ruined by the professor calling me and not only did my shoulders drop but dread filled me as I looked to the male.

"Yes sir?" I was rather reluctanted but knew I had too. Why did I end up like this early? And curse these idoits i have to deal with and what ever bullshit they've caused.

"I need someone to take these three-" a motion to the idoits on the ground "to the nurses office." Which professor crewel motion to said three to stand rather than look to them. most likely he was super ticked and needed them out before he killed them. Which is fair.

Looking to the guys i noted that their was something diffrent but when they stood it was very clear and I sighed. "Ace what did you do?"

"What?!?! Why are blaming me!" Ace look offended, and I gave him a rather unamused look.

"Because you're you, now come on." I moved to grab grim and pick him up, and by the sounds of his voice I'm guessing grim also turn genders.

I sighed softly wondering why I again got stuck with this bs, but again life seems to be out to get me.

Thus I begin walking to the nurses office tuning out the guys behind me like I normal did when I wasn't interested in something only paying slight tention so that I can pick selective parts to comment on and pertented I care, when I actually don't.

Though the good thing about always being the extra is that I don't have to actually say much while the three guys now turn girls talked about who was to blame, and yeah seemed like ace was at fault for egging the other two, but grim was at fault for not paying attention and just tossing stuff and poor duece the sort of innocent bystander from grim and ace bs.

Another sigh and I wonder if I would be getting another gray hair, the thought was a bothersome though. I swear I'm getting to feel like an old lady dealing with all this bs. Glancing to the roof i gave a silent prey to help me with all this.

As we walked (why was this damn school so fucken big?) I saw familiar faces and shifted grim in my arms and waved at the group of guys.

Said group noticed and moved over as they also greeted me. Honestly it was good to see actually friends rather than people I've gotten involved with (not to say that I didn't think of deuce and jack as my friends but thats beside the point)

"Hey! When did we get more girls here?" My vp seemed to be the one to speak first since I can't run a club alone.

"Yeah, would be nice, but nah, we got anime plot who knows what happening here." I was speaking with my hands or rather one since I still had grim and didn't trust putting the feline down.

"Oh?" My vp seemed interested and he and the others seemed to look behind me at the guys.

Deuce was the one who spoke. "What are looking at? You want a fight?"

I rolled my eyes at the remark and it seemed before I could open my mouth ace also made a comment which I just sighed already a headache was coming.

I looked to duece and told him to calm down, and than to ace and told him to not be mean. Before turning to my friends. "Yeah.... I'm sure you can guess who these guys are, but yeah typical gender bend plot though I'm hoping to keep this out of nsfw plot points because I rather not deal with the backlash of all that." Because what's good in fiction is not always ok or even right in reality.

My vp hummed and mention that do we know if this is temporary which actually seemed to register to the guys and actually seemed concerned. Which honestly good, let them be fearful.

"Well that's why I've been tasked to take them to nurse and get this all sorted out and if not well...." I looked to the side not wanting to admit I would find it funny, and hey at least I won't be the only girl anymore. Though would that mean I have to explaining how to deal with all the problems that one deals with as a girl? God, that would be awkward.

Seeing that the once guys were now worried i noticed a smirk on my vp's face for a moment before he waved me off as he and his group made their way off. though not with out a comment that had me snickering while it flustered the the guys.

That's the good thing about having friends that can be petty, they do shit that will act as revenge and they can't be attacked for. Because who knows how many times I've complained about my issues and it seems my friends had my back which honestly was rather touching.

"Come on ya'll let's go, after all the longer you're girls the longer I'm going to have to teach you not to get knocked up." I snickered using the same words my vp used and laughed at their flustered faces as we continued our journey to the nurses office, and I had to admit I felt a bit lighter after that interaction.

[risu5waffles]

dev diary # ffff... fucken' just get *something* done

(i know the video's long, but only the first six and a half minutes are pertinent, the rest is just older builds).

i don't know why i thought any of this would be a good idea. Which, honestly is how a vast majority of things i've done in life have started, and, i mean, i'm here and things have mostly worked out ok.

Not sure at what point things went from "oh, this is just going to be a goofy one-off set for the show" to "huh, maybe we have a thing here." This will, ultimately, probably not wind up being a thing. As much fun as it was toying around wiv making a bullet hell shooter, especially since i've never really tried anything like that before, i don't think i have the brainmeats to really balance it well enough to be fun. Thinking about waves, and bullet spreads, and timing, it was very much a "i dunno, this looks kinda neat, tho'?" And it is kinda neat. i can be proud of that much, but even in the most recent build, there's weird jank too. Like, a couple of turrets just weren't spawning? Until the very end, after clearing all the waves they decided to spawn all at once?

Even when things are working right it's too easy if you're staying on top of the turrets (and that's really not that tough to do), but impossible if you let a couple of them slip. You can see the difference in the first run in the video, and then the one after the backstage stuff. There's no real wiggle room in the middle, tho'. i put in boltholes and a retract function on the turrets if you leave them alone for 15seconds, but i think when i actually record in this set (you know, the actual function i built the thing for?) i'm going to have to just hide and ignore everything, or i won't be able to focus enough to actually do my review. Lol? Lmao?

There's a lot of DNA in here from chronos453's VR Survival Challenge, and i strongly recommend giving that a play if you haven't recently. It's just so, so very good. Clean, elegant, tough but not unfair, super fun. You can see the backstage for it in this video, and i recommend that too. It's really amazing stuff. chronos gave me a lot of little advice and bouncing ideas off of when i was making this set, and i really appreciate it. The other reason i went wiv retreating turrets was i didn't want my set to look /too/ much like his level, but we'll see how well that worked out.

[phoenixrising0308]

Wacky Drabbles: FMO Keeping up with Jessica Garcia

Books: The Royal Romance Books all of them

Rating: M (18+) Sexual situation and adult themes.

Trigger Warnings in this chapter: 

Pairing: Liam x Jessica Garcia (MC)

Wacky Drabble A/U: This story exists on its own and may or may not be a part of their journey together. Traits, personalities, and characters are all the same. Some canon characters may appear but in a different manifestation and by no means exist in that form in Agent Phoenix A/U this is not meant to be anything other than an A/U onto itself. Catch up with wacky drabbles here

Disclaimer

This week’s wackydrabbles dribble challenge: What wacky habit, hobby, or interest does your MC or favorite character have? You have 500 words to tell us about it!

Chapter Summary: I think the title speaks for its self but what if Liam got a little case of FOMO because his favorite duchess is hiding something from him.

A/N: time zones I was so over trying to figure it out so I'm waving the fandom magical wand on this.

A/N2: JLI short hand for Jessica and Liam in the drabble verse

Song inspiration:  Lana Del Rey - Young and Beautiful

Word count: 495

Average reading time: 8 minutes

JLI Quarters

Liam woke up with his favorite duchess at his side. Her face was covered in chocolate, so were his silk bedsheets. In her hand the weapon… a melted bar of Hershey. Retirement was rough and sleep eating was something she did when she was troubled, along with talking to herself. He asked her for weeks what was troubling her and a typical response would be “Baby, you just don’t get it.” Deep down inside he was hurt this was the woman he nearly died for believed he was incapable of understanding what she was going through or worse that she couldn’t confide in him. Liam needed to know why she was always on edge on Thursday and devastated on Friday. Liam was desperate for answers and he turned to the men in her life that raised her he started off with Adam Garcia he was sympathetic but had nothing to offer other than to say “I’m not a fucken social worker ask her. I’m trying to hook up with her friend I can’t get involved brother.” Then he moved on to the man that attempted to taser him in the dick Mateo Garcia who greeted him with the usual “Que pasa Cabrón (What’s up dumbass)” and then he was offered a tip. The NYPD Captain told him it was simple to come home at 1:15 pm to see what she was up to. Liam did just that.

At 1:15 pm he abruptly entered the home they shared and saw Jessica hysterically crying into a bag of Doritos with a few empty cans of Coke Zero Cherry. He sat next to the love of his life and held her into his arms and asked “Love, is this why you’ve been so upset every week?”

“See, I told you you wouldn’t understand.”

“So explain it to me.”

“The media ruins everything. They were in love they have kids together and now she cant finish law school remember I couldn’t finish school? Remember I wanted a career but I couldn’t have one here?”

He pulled her into his arms, kissed her, and said “I see”

Jessica took a shaky breath and said, “I just want Kim to be happy she has been through so much. Kimye’s marriage was a timeless love story like ours. Look at what the tabloids did to us. They ruined everything.”

Liam sighed and said, “I know love. But out of all the love stories ever written, or produced ours is the best. We will stand the test of time. You are my happy beginning and ending. I can’t even begin to express how much you mean to me. Also, I have been following along Leo watches this and you know what I want Scott to get back with Kourtney myself.” He kissed her on the forehead and they watched the show in silence. And at the end, of the show they Kim K ugly-cried together while holding each other.

[shimshenanigans]

I have never in my life ordered anyone to do anything. I’ve requested and asked, but command? Never.

Until today.

I only had like 30 minutes of my shift left, and I was heading out to my car to take my last 15 minute break. You know, a nice slow down at the end of my shift. I’m out in the parking lot and I hear from a distance behind me ‘You made it wrong!’ and of course I don’t make drinks wrong, so I ignore it. I hear it like 3-4 more times, and I realize it’s ‘he made it wrong’ instead, so I turn around. I’m more than half way to my car by now, and this lady took the time and effort to call out and chase me down to complain, despite me CLEARLY being either on break or off the clock. She’s mostly done with her complaint, and I just interject ‘Alright, let’s go’ and just start walking back to go remake it. She starts to say how it’s not a big deal, but I cut her off and, not even looking back, go ‘No no, come along’ and just kinda raise my hand and do that little wave/follow me gesture with just my first two fingers.

I go behind the counter and make her drink. I did absolutely nothing different from usual except...I added water to her drink. That’s all I did. Add WATER. I watered down her espresso right in front of her and she LIKED IT BETTER THAT WAY.

Yeah, you’re fucken right I walked it all the way back indoors, despite the fact that she was clearly in a hurry or whatever. Don’t chase me down in the parking lot then act like it wasn’t a big deal. I’m making your big deal into an actual big deal. Fucking hell, I felt so disrespected.

So instead of taking my break I just left 20 minutes early since there was no point in me coming back to work for only 5 minutes.

[wh0re-4-techno]

7. Flirty Mess ((PROFESSOR TECHNO))

Description: It's you first day back to Techno's class, but how could you sit down through the lesson without thinking about your lil make out session from earlier that week. But that doesn't stop you from going back to him.

Warning(s): Steamy day dreams about Technoblade. Not technical smut, but there is explicit grinding.

Words: 3723

Last part :: Next part

You gaze into his face, his eyes piercing through yours. Both of your lips swollen from kissing but that didn't matter in the moment. You dip your head down to him, his lips connecting with yours. Biting softly on your bottom lip, you open your mouth for him. His tongue slowly slipped in as if he was cautious.

You moan into his mouth as your hand grips this shirt, bunching it in the process. You lean in more, hungry for more. Both of you craved for each other at a point it was becoming more and more painful.

Rocking your hips back and forth, his hands placed nicely on your hips, pulling you down more. Airy moans fly freely into the air.

One of his hands snaked there way up from your waist to your neck. Slight pressure as he gripped onto your throat. Making you squirm under his power over you, your hands grasp for his hair.

He broke the heated kiss, in a low tone he whispered. "Hello? Y/n?" You stare blankly at him, but everything started to disappear. "HELLO?"

Minx waves her hands over your face. You shake your head slightly while blinking, the bright lights of the café seem particularly more fluorescent this morning. "You good up there?" She questions, she finally puts her hands down. But her face was still confused as to why you've been so off this morning. "Are you okay?" She worries, which makes you a little happy at least. "Yeah-Yeah I'm fine. Just really fucken tired I guess." You grab a hold of your coffee, raising it to your lips before take a long sip of it.

You shouldn't be day dreaming of him, especially because he was your Professor. It made you feel wrong and filthy, but at the same moment you where just kissing him in his office a few day ago and you thought it was amazing.

"Well that coffee will wake you up." She drinks mid sentence. It felt like you were on the brink of having a headache.

Trying her best to change the subject as it was getting a tad bit awkward, Minx asks, "So how's Karl?" Your eyes widen at her question. Why was it always about boys? "Excuse me?" You were in confusion as to why she would even ask you about him. You only talked to him one time and even that was because he called you. Both of you didn't even text each other. "You were so cute together at the party!" She exclaims, "How do you remember that night, you were drinking way more then me?" You pinch the bridge of your nose. "Because Miss Y/l/n, you're a light weight." You just huff at her.

Your hand still on your face, "I haven't talked to him since Wednesday, I don't think I'll text him either." You just wanted to go back to bed and skip the day like Minx would do so often. "Com'on! You've been waiting for a guy to show up in your life!" She puts down her coffee, placing her hands flat down on the table. Waiting for you, she continues. "Now you have this sweet and kind boy." You reluctantly let her take your hands into hers.

"Why don't you ask him for a coffee date? What's in the way of this?" She asks. If only she knew about you and your Professor.

"I just don't have the time. And if I'm going to be honest with you, I don't want a boyfriend right now." That was a lie. Well half a lie, you didn't want Karl to be your boyfriend. But that doesn't mean you wanted someone else to be your boyfriend, if thats what he, being Techno, even wanted to actually date you. "Y/n, I just want you to be happy..." She was honest, her words spoken carefully. You look up at her, she had a sweet smile waiting for you. You softly chuckle, "Thank you Minx. But I am happy right now." You tell her with a toothy smile, you wanted to tell her everything but you didn't know how she would react and you didn't want to learn if she'd flip out about your little situation.

Letting go of her hand. She reaches for your coffee cup, feeling as it was close to being finish you take the last sip you could before she grabs it.

Great timing as your class was about to begin, unsure if you should even show up a little early, if the two of you left right now or show up late.

There was no option for you at the moment as Minx takes your empty cup along with hers to the trash. Waiting for you to follow her out. You take your bag and head to the doors with her. "I really don't want go to my class. I have like two papers due at the end of class and I have to finish both of them during the lecture." Minx tells you while opening the door for you, feeling the cold breeze on your legs. Slightly shivering from it as you didn't wear pants, instead you wore a plaid skirt, with a plane white shirt and a jacket.

"I bet you could do them both before the lecture ends." You praise her, she was a really good writer and could knock off assignments really quick compared to you. "Uh huh sure." She rolls her eyes at you, you chuckle at her annoyance. "I'm telling you the truth. You can do it with ease." You slightly push her, she just nods off.

Minx checks her phone, "My class starts in 10 minutes, I'll see at the field?" She asks while putting her phone right back in her pocket again. "I'll text you if I can, I have to talk to my teacher about this assignment he asked us to do over the week and I didn't do it." You tell her about your homework, which you completely forgotten about from your other classes and the party. It completely went over your head. She understands but sticks out her tongue out like a little kid, "Boo. But okay, I'll meet you whenever." She goes in for a hug, you gladly take and hug her back. You watch as she walks the other direction.

-----

Walking in his class, a few minutes before it starts.

He was slumped at his desk, his face down in a book. Heavily focused, maybe he wouldn't notice you come in. But to little of your knowledge, he was waiting ever so patiently for you to step in his class. Each time a person came in he would glance up with excitement for it potentially being you.

He slightly shifted his eyes to see who just walked in and once he sees you a small smirk curved on his lips. You avoid eye contact at first. It was awkward for you. Just knowing how well he could kiss your neck at a point it makes you moan. You couldn't look at him, you didn't even need to look in a mirror to tell you were red in the face.

You walk up towards your normal seat, seeing the three boys waving to you from a row up from you. You wave back with a smile. While sitting down with your bookbag beside you hear Wilbur, "We haven't talked since the party, how are you?" He asks for the group of boys, they all looked down at you. "I've been good." The collectively nod theirs heads. "It was a hell of a party, you know if y'all would have another any time soon?" You ask, they chuckle at your response. "Hell yeah it was." Tommy added on. Then Toby starts talking, "I'll ask around if there's going to be any other party's soon." He also winks at you, not romantically but as friendly you could do.

The four of you have a small conversation before Techno gets the lecture started.

"Okay! I will be collecting the homework from last class at the end, other than that I will put on a video about Roman mythology." He stands from his desk, hands pressed flat on the desk.

He wore black slacks and a white button down, without a tie.

How you wanted to grab him by the collar of his shirt and pull him on top of you. Letting him do whatever he pleases.

Slowly drifting, techno reals you back by asking the class, "Everyone understand? Good!" Slowly scanning the students for responses. His eyes landing on yours, it felt as he just saw right through you for mere second before moving on. He turned away and back to him desk where he started to play video.

But as the video was on, you couldn't look away from Techno. He was very distracting, mid-way through the video he glances up at you. Seeing as you were already staring at him. He decides to play with you, he carefully pulling his hands from his book to his shirt. Making sure you were completely focus on him, after knowing you were giving him your undying attention. He painfully slowly started to unbutton the first few from his shirt.

He sends a wink to you. You couldn't take this anymore...

-----

"Time for you to leave, get your asses out of my class!" He clapped his hands together. The harshness of the light turning on suddenly made you and your classmates hiss in slight pain. "I'm serious, get and go." While standing up from your seat you let a couple of people included the trio to leave before you. Grabbing your bookbag and heading down the stairs. Seeing as everyone was pulling out their completed homework assignment and you didn't have it finished, this was almost perfect way for you and him to talk.

Waiting patiently at the door, watching as the last few people leave the classroom. You close the door, once again it was you and him. Alone.

He looked over to you, a grin growing on his face. "Back for more?" He asks with an eyebrow quirked, his cockyness and playfulness was making it hard for you to even answer him. As he heads to you with long strides you tell him, "I- You could say that-" Clearly flustered by his words he cuts you off. "I'm just teasing darling, why do you need my assistance?" He stood tall in front of you, it was taking your whole body from wanting to jump on that man's bones. Biting your inner lip, "I didn't finish the homework assignment, so I'm asking if you could help me." You ask, your hands fidgeting the entire time.

"Of course I'll help you darling, but may I ask why you didn't finish it?" He questions whilst opening the door, gesturing with his head tilt to follow him out. But knowing that he would take you to his office, you follow him with little shame. 

Holding the door open to his office, you question if you should even go in there, but your feet make the decision for you. Walking in it's still the same, thinking on it, you don't think he'll ever change it. Still have the same books and tea cup littering along his room, but at least it smells very fine of plants and tea.

As soon as the door closes with a click he grabs onto your arm, not letting you go further into his room as you where heading to your normal seat. He was hesitant at first but seeing as you didn't protest, he pulls you to him. Your body's almost touching, achingly too close. He softly spoke, his eyes piercing through yours, "I could careless about that stupid homework assignment." He holds his breath slightly, "I can't get that kiss out of my head..." Shifting his head slowly down, too frighten by a disapproval face, how could you ever have feeling for him? He's your damn Professor, it would never work. He thinks. But as his thoughts rushed to take over his smart mind.

You pull his attention, looking back at him with a giddy smile. Quickly his worrisome thoughts disappear. "Me too..." His lips slight part in astonishment. He pulled you in slowly, making sure you were okay with this and you were. Your lips collide. It was rushed and needy, just wanting and waiting for eachother throughout the day that lead to right now. How've you imagine this to happen again while sleeping and day dreaming. It was so intoxicating for you, how his lips fit perfectly into yours.

Hitching your breath as his hands softly land on your waist and pull you completely against him.

Your hands automatically connect to his neck, your finger tips play with the ends of his soft hair. Pushing him ever so slightly down, making him have to bend over. Deeping the kiss, he walks the both of you to his desk.

While heading towards his desk, his hands wondered aimlessly. Taking your steps back you run into the leather chairs, one of your hands push, well try to push it away. Techno helps you out and pushes the chair for you. Reaching to the desk. Jumping on with a huff, you were back kissing him. He tasted like green tea, which the evidence was on his desk as the little tea cup still had a little left in it. But that didn't matter in the moment. His hands roam your body, taking off your jacket in the process.

Signing in bliss, opening your mouth for him. Giving him the opportunity to slip his tongue in, which he took with little to no hesitation this time around. You didn't even want to fight for dominance. Knowing he had it all, you just wanted him. His hands pull on the hem of your shirt, pushing it up for his hands to touch you. His finger tips touching your hot waist, slowly going up. You lock your hand in his hair and pull him down more. "Watch it with the hair darling." He hisses, pulls away for a split second, telling you stern. That rough voice was enough for you to squirm. But he was back to kissing you right away.

He presses his body closer to you, trying your hardest not to moan. But that didn't stop your body doing so, uncontrollably you let out an airy moan. Feeling you shutter while doing so. His lips leave yours, his eyes sparkle with desire. He placed his lips on your cheek, to your chin, to your neck. Kissing a tail down to your shoulder.

Biting down and sucking. Your lips open to an "O" shape and moan. He left many hickeys, varying in sizes and how dark they where. You grip his hair once again, this time not caring if he told you off about it. This time wanting him to correct you. As his lips reach a perfect sport on your neck. You swallow a loud moan as he bites down. You whimper softly.

You feel his hands slide down your waist and out of your shirt to your hips. They snake down to the back of your thighs. His hands where cold compare to how hot your where becoming. Your legs wrapped around his hips, your skirt lifting up in the process.

Slowly, you started to grind onto him. His belt was placed perfectly to hit your clothed clit as you slowly go up and down. Your neediness was overpowering you as he continued to leave hickeys all over your shoulder and neck. They where going to be impossible to cover, and you weren't ready to be teased for days from Minx. But all of that was out the window right now.

You moan as he pushes back, figuring out  where you getting some sort of pleasure. He broke off his kisses, which made you slightly frustrated but then he spoke, "You sound so beautiful." His words in your ear made you melt into putty. You slam your lips back onto his. It muffled your moans as they where getting harder to stay quiet. You didn't want anyone waking by his office to hear you.

But then,

KNOCK KNOCK.

Scaring the shit out of the two of you, causing you to jump at the sudden loud knocking at that someone interrupted you and Techno.

"Fuck me!" He curses in a whisper before resting his head down your shoulder, out of breath. "I would most definitely like too." You say provocatively, taking him completely out of his mind. You sit there for a few moments, such a tease, you know that by now. But how much the both of you wanted each other, it was hard to contain yourself.

Hearing another pair of knocks.

He peppers little kisses on your collar bone before pulling away from you. You quickly jump off the desk, trying to make as little noise as you could. You rush step to the side of the room, "One second, I'm coming." His voice slightly cracking while walking to the door.

He brushes his hair with his fingers like a comb, fixing what you had done to him in the heated situation. Flatten his shirt to take out any wrinkles, opening the door. "Hello Sir, Could I talk to you for a second?" That voice... Why do you know it? Fuck. "Hey Wilbur." Techno says awkwardly, knowing that you and him were buddy buddy, as he sees you talking to him and the two other boys every class.

It was Wilbur goddamn Soot.

Your hand reaches your mouth, covering it as you were in shock. Your leg slight bouncing with anxiety. What if he sees you like this, skirt bunched, shirt slight lifted with your makeup smudged. And where was you jacket?

Looking left and right, no where to be seen, but as you glance at the desk and slightly beside the chair is where it laid.

Techno's hand holds the door tight, hiding you from your fellow classmate as you yourself didn't look exactly presentable at the moment. "Actually Wilbur, I don't have the time too-" Techno says with a little nervousness to his voice, if he saw you two together at this state, he would obviously know that something was up and Techno wasn't going to take that chance. And now that your jacket was on the floor for him to see, hopefully he doesn't notice or doesn't remember that you are the one whom owns that jacket. "Please Mr. Blade." He pleads with Techno, but no avail. There was no way he was going to let him in. "I'm sorry, I really can't right now." He declined once again to the boy.

Wilbur sighs, hearing him starting to walk away, "How bout you come to my office tomorrow!" He reaches out slightly, smiling at his student, he didn't really want to leave him helpless with whatever he need his help with. He could never do that to a student. Wilbur gladly takes his offer and you could hear him head off down the hall way.

Techno closes the door, his back pressed on it.

He brings his hand up to his forehead, "That was close, too close." He swears once again, swiping his face. He's breath pretty heavily, you step up to him, still a mess. Comforting him, you place your hands on his chest, lightly patting him. "Hey, it's okay. We just have to be more careful with, this." You motion between the two of you with your index finger. Both of you really haven't labeled anything. "And he didn't see me! So that's a huge plus!" You smile, trying to light up the conversation and tension.

He looks down at you, a soft smile starts to curve, still anxious of what just happened. But he was just happy that you were here with him, and not getting caught.

He starts chuckling before telling you, "This seems like a good time to give you something. Actually it's not, but I've been wanting too for a while." You fiddle with his collar as he spoke, curious what he meant. "I didn't know how to exactly ask you for your number. And that it's just the us now and we stopped kissing-" Cutting him off as you pull him towards you by the collar, stopping him dead in his tracks.

He swallowed hard. Your lips so close to his, it was taking good strength in yourself to not kiss him. "Now is the perfect time." Saying in a low tone, your eye flicker back up to him. A somewhat goofy smile curved on his lips. "Perfect." He said with a soft laugh, you loosen your hand, giving him a small kiss on his cheek.

You let him go, stepping back he fixes himself by patting down his shirt.

He hands you his phone, already open to his contacts. Quickly you put your number in and simply putting your name in. Once handing his phone back he sends you a ":)".

You put him in your contacts as just T, hopefully no one would ever make the connection between the two of you.

Both of you stand for a few seconds before Techno speaks. "Would you want to go to lunch with me?" He asks, sliding his phone in his back pocket. You   obviously had a smile on your face as he asks, but you question, "Like a date?" He stares down at you, it seemed dry cut that it was going to be a date. But you wanted to hear him say it himself. "Yes, a date." That made you grin wider by his confirmation. You were really going on a lunch date with your Professor.

"I would like nothing more than that Techno." Which made Techno stiff out a chuckle, he thought you were so damn cute.

Taglist

@alexandrium @aplaintart @sadassflatass @sugarcoated44 @taylorsmakingfuckingmacandcheese @sammyxn

[thr-333]

Mismatch- Part 16

Bio Dad Bruce Wayne Month 2020

When everyones dates go very well

First< Previous > Next

-------

“Thanks for dropping us off,” Marion slides out Selina's car, Kagami and Chloe following, “We couldn’t take the same route as them,”

“I’d be disappointed if you did,” Selina teases, with an edge of seriousness.

“Thank you,” Kagami chimes in, getting waved off by Selina as she and Chloe leave to hunt down the targets.

“So you’re going to tell him?” Marion whispers through the open window.

“Yep,” She sighs, tightening grip on the steering wheel, “We’re going to go on a date of out own, completely romantic, then ruin the evening,”

“You really think he’s going to be mad?” Marion cringes, getting a reassuring smile.

“At me,” She clarifies, “Don’t you worry he’ll be thrilled to have more kids,”

Marion holds back a laugh at her exasperated tone, “Have fun,”

“I won’t,” Selina assures, throwing back a, “Have fun,”

“I will,” Marion grins, spying on the totally-not-a-date between two disasters will be nothing but entertaining.

Marion waves at the leaving car before jogging to catch up with the girls. Staying slightly behind to watch them try and talk about plants. Chloe trying to sound more intelligent than ‘look at the pretty flower’, not that Kagami would mind. He resists the urge to drags his fingers through the leaves of ferns and vines as they walk down the winding paths of the botanical garden. Too many times has he touched plant life only for it to wither and die later, a side effect of holding his miraculous too long. So he always made sure Marinette is around to counteract the bad luck.

The urge gets easier to resist as they enter a more open garden area, filled with flower patches and green grass. Probably the cleanest place in Gotham likely thanks to a certain rouge that would hunt you down for littering here. He spots the two lovebirds and directs the girls to a nearby tree well suited for hiding behind as they spy on the little picnic Adrien has set up, in a grassy patch surrounded by flowers.

“Oh my god,” Chloe groans, “How can they be such idiots?”

“Can we just tell them?” Kagami asks irritably, not for the first time.

“No, let their relationship take its natural course,” Marion scolds, not for the first time.

“Do you think they’re going to be just as slow when they’re together?” Chloe complains more than asks, “Will they ever get married?”

“Are you kidding?” Marion scoffs, “The day after they get together someones going to propose,”

“Probably both,” Kagami predicts, watching as they both fumble over something.

“Probably,” Marion and Chloe both agree, as the fumbled object gets dropped.

“Well, hey there!” a high pitch voice shouts through their whispering, “Who’re we spying on?”

Marion whips around coming nose to nose with Harley Quinn herself. He takes a step back to see Poison Ivy standing just behind.

“Um…” Marion debates going for his baton, they didn’t seem hostile but they don’t need to be to cause damage, “Our friends date?”

“Ohhh!” Harley stands on her tiptoes to look over their heads, “Aren't they just precious?!”

“Yes,” Ivy agrees to Harley’s goo-goo eyes despite not having looked over once.

“Let's go say hi,” Harley links her arms with Marion and Chloe’s dragging them over to the picnic.

“What are you doing here!” Marinette shouts as soon as they approach, seemingly more surprised at them than the two rogues.

“I caugh’em spyin on ya and decided to drop in,” Harley releases them and sits down, “This looks delicious!”

Harley takes a cookie from a plate, eyes lighting up when she takes a bite. Marion locks eyes with Marinette as confused as him. It only gets worse when Ivy sits down as well, on the grass not the blanket. Well it’s not like he can just leave. Marion shrugs and sits down, immediately reaching over to steal from Marinette's plate, ignoring the plates around him.

“Sooo,” Harley hums partly around a mouthful of cake, rocking back with legs crossed, “What’s ya names,”

“Marinette, that's Marion,” Marinette hisses his name, as she tries to snatch back half a sandwich.

“Oh! Brucie’s kids!” Harley claps her hands together, “You’re the Wayne twins!”

“Uhhh…” Yes? No? Kinda? Soon? It’s up to him?

“No they're not,” Kagami takes a seat following Chloe, “It’s just a baseless rumour,”

“Yep!” Marion agrees way to loudly, “A completely baseless rumours, no fact here, nope,”

The look he gets from Marinette is expected, but it’s Chloe’s lingering gaze that really gets to him.

“I like what you’ve done with the flowers,” Marinette covers for him, alerting him that Poison Ivy had made many more bloom.

“I didn’t do much,” Ivy says, even as the grass around her is a couple inches taller than it used to be, “They already wanted to bloom so bright at seeing you,”

“Really?” Marinette sweat drops, reaching for her bag, “I do have a bit of a green thumb, I take care of a garden back home,”

“What wonderful things do you grow?” Ivy asks with keen interest, Adrien off to the side looking awestruck at Marinette’s composure.

“She’ll be takin all day now,” Harley spins towards the three other date crashers, “I didn’t hear your names!”

Chloe and Kagami startle as she leans further into their personal space.

“Surely if you’ve heard of the twins you’ve heard of me,” Chloe flips her hair, only getting a blank face from Harley, huffing, “Chloe Bourgeois,”

“Kagami,” She replies curtly, “Marion doesn't appreciate date crashing,”

“It’s alright Kags,” Marion assures, he more had a problem with having to hold her back from yelling at them both when they didn't kiss after fireworks.

“Ohhhh, are you two dating,” Harley stage whispers, making Chloe choke on her drink.

“No not at all,”

“Just friends,”

And not friends in the Adrien Agreste way.

“Ew gross you two dating?” Chloe cringes, “Ridiculous, utterly ridiculous!”

“Oh! Then you two!” Harley exclaims, addressing the girls.

“Umm…”

“Well I….”

“Yes,”

“Rion!” Chloe yells, blushing furiously at his shit eating grin.

“Well let me give you some advice,” Harley sing songs, a not so subtle glance back at Ivy.

“I don’t think that's necessary-”

“Hush now,” She shushes Kagami, ���So when you're on a date and some bozo tries interrupting, there's this nifty thing you can do with certain nerves-Or! If you have the tools, a good whack upside the head-Or! My favourite! You get your gun and…”

Marion shifts away, still keeping Chloe and Kagami in his sights, both completely red.

“-And I planted this one three years ago,” Marinette explains, letting Ivy hold her phone, eyes glued to whatever picture was on it, “I know they tend to like partial shade but I found this one prefers to be more in the sun, so I just move it on especially sunny days,”

“Your garden is brilliant they all look so-” Her gaze snaps up to Marion, making him freeze in place, “They do not like you,”

“Um,” It takes a second to realise she was talking about the plants, “I guess not, the plants at home like me,”

“Do they?” Ivy frowns, and Marion desperately hopes she likes Marinette enough to not attack him.

“Well, we have a catnip plant that does,” Or at least Plagg likes it enough to do his best not to let anything, even himself, destroy it.

“You do?” Ivy turns to Marinette, who starts talking about the plant.

Marion takes this opportunity to escape back into the conversation they were having with Harley-

“And if you really want to have fun in bed you can-” Nope never mind.

Marion stands, considers bringing Adrien along to find some more snacks for their bigger group. But he seemed just as enthralled with Marinette as Ivy is with plants. He walks off waving to Marinette as she looks over to check on him. He smiles at the silent desperate pleads for help Chloe and Kagami give him. With a bounce in his step Marion walks off.

He didn’t even realise he had left them alone with two rouges until he was halfway through the gardens. Whatever. Marinette could handle them and they both seemed friendly enough, if not very polite. If they wanted to crash a date he can think of another person that would rather it happen to them.

“So the twins got out of hospital yesterday,” yes because that's a good way to bring up the topic of your illegitimate children to their out of the loop father.

“That’s fast,” Translated means; I’m suspicious.

“Did you look into those Paris heroes?” No she isn’t stalling not at all, this is important.

“I did, they’ve been working mostly alone for years,” Bruce scowls, picking at his food “I don’t know how the league hasn’t heard about this,”

“Didn’t Marion say this Ladybug person fixes everything?” Selina hums, she had been to Paris and never saw anything, they couldn't be that good could they?

"Is that what he meant?" Bruce looks up at her genuinely puzzled.

Selina hides her smirk behind her wine, which she desperately needed for this conversation. She had forgotten not everyone could understand their babbling. Not even Bruce, yet. She merely hums in response, before taking a gulp of wine.

“I plan on contacting her,” Bruce admits out loud, their secluded rooftop table ensuring privacy, “Did they say anything more to you?”

“They’ve had some other things on their mind lately,” She doesn't meet his eye, so they were back to this topic, great.

“Post traumatic stress?” Bruce guesses, she wished- wait no- that's not good.

Selina would rather do this a hundred times over than have her kids suffer like that. Fortunately they didn't seem to be. Which could be concerning in its own right.

“No, actually, they seem completely unaffected by a near death experience,” Selina sighs, they should be right? Thats normal for regular people right? Well they weren't normal, mainly because of the man sitting across from her, who needed to know that, “Just like their father,”

“Tom?” of-fucken-course he had to make this harder, no she will not admit she was purposefully vague.

“No,” Selina feels the anxiety in her chest choke her, “You,”

And nope that last word only made it worse.

“... What?” Bruce pauses, fork still in mid air.

“You,” She places her empty glass down, the clink hitting the table deafening.

“... Selina, what are you saying,” Bruce lowers the fork, halfway between a scowl and suspicion.

“I mean we’ve been at it for years is it really that surprising?” Selina tries to play off, joking tone not overshadowing her panic.

“Selina,” Theres that stern tone, paired with the signature Bat glare.

“... They’re your kids, our kids,” Selina corrects, making sure to meet his eye. No tricks this time.

She lets the silence hang, studying Bruce's face. At first you can clearly tell he's trying to keep a mask on, but it cracks bit by bit. She sees confusion, realisation, panic, anger, disappointment all over lapping. Swirling together repeating over and over again until settling on anger.

“Why didn’t you tell me!” He explodes, pushing her off the ledge she had been on all day, or the last couple days, or hell for eighteen goddamn years.

“Because you-you’re-” She fumbles, so many reasons, mainly relating to Bats in some way, but that wasn't the main reason, “You said you didn’t want kids!”

“You never told me I already had kids!" The realisation hits Selina that he remembers.

If it was just now, or he had for years. He remembered the night she had asked if he wanted a family. He had said no. That he couldn't. That he had a responsibility to the city. So she had left. Not daring to see him when she was pregnant and not wanting to see him afterwards. The next time she saw Bruce he had just adopted a child.

“What would you have done! Huh?!” A child who a year later was chasing criminals around Gotham, “Would you quit? Would you dress them up too and make them fight crime!? I sent them to Paris to avoid that!”

“You know full well I never made them do anything!” Maybe not on purpose, but they do a whole lot for his approval.

“Their kids Bruce! You should have never let them join you out there!” She rants, pacing away from the table.

She gave them up so they would never join her either. Although with how much Marion likes cats he would surely love his own cat suit.

“How would you know what would happen?” Bruce demands, keeping pace with her, dragging his hands through his hair, “I-god- I hadn't even adopted Dick yet and you wrote me off!”

“ Exactly , do you really think you could have raised them!” Dick's his argument for good parenting? Better than Jason.

“Maybe I wanted to!” Bruce yells, anger crumbling, he collapses onto a love seat looking over the city, “Maybe I wanted to raise at least one of my children,”

“I know,” Selina tentatively sits on the chairs arm, reaching over to him, “But they deserved a chance to live without all this ,"

She vaguely gestures to the city and partly to Bruce. Who looks offended at his inclusion.

"They’ve been in Gotham a week Bruce," She slides into the seat, arguing her point before he has the chance, "And they have the press after them, villains attacking, they just got out the hospital ,”

“Hm,” Bruce looks out at the city, not really seeing any of it. “They really are like me huh,”

“Without a doubt,” She gets a slight tug at the lips from Bruce, completely humourless.

They fall silent Bruce looking out at the city. She studies his expression, less of a world wind of emotion now but certainly still in turmoil. He starts to fix his mask back in place, she looks away so he doesn't have to. Looking out at the view they were meant to be enjoying on their date. One that she had planned. Bruce was never going to trust her to plan one again. Or at least he will always be expecting her to spring shocking news on him.

“What do you want to do now?” She asks the question she has wondered for years.

Whenever they were alone and things were calm, unnervingly calm for Gotham. She had thought of telling him. Partly because the calm alarms her, in a life of chaos she felt out of place in it. It would be the perfect way to bring the storm. While cats tended to hate water she has been an alley cat all her life, the calm was meant for house cats. However, thats what the other part of her wanted. For that calm to stay, but to include their kids. Who always sat at the edge of that calm, threatening to ruin it never letting her settle into it. Maybe that was why she could never enjoy it. Maybe now that they were in the storm, the next calm would be with the two of them.

“... I don’t know,” a rarity for the Batman, more common for the man underneath.

----------------

Taglist:

@technicallyburninggarden @fusser90  @misslenamooney @superbwhispersconnoisseur @biodad-bruce-month

[mymoodwriting]

Danger For Two

F!Reader x Johnny x Ten

Genre: Kidnap/Yandere AU

Warning: Anxiety, Fear, Betrayal, Kidnapping, Drugs, Nightmares, Medicine

Words: 5.1K

Chapters:

One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight | Nine | Epilogue

Prompt: Johnny and Ten were a power couple from the start, and despite being hopelessly in love, there was always something missing from their lives. The night they set out to permanently fill in that hole, they stumble upon you. A harmless night of fun for you is their trial run, and it seems they’re both content with keeping you.

@packesel​

“Life’s tough kid, but you don’t have to fake your own death to get a fresh start.” The officer stood up. “It should take a few days to reinstate your things.”

“Thank you…”

“You’re free to go.”

    The officer left the interrogation room first, quickly followed by Jaehyun. You stayed put for a while longer, pondering over what had just happened. You couldn’t stay there so eventually you got up, seeing that Jae wasn’t waiting up for you, and nearly at the exit. You rushed to catch up to him, knowing you needed to speak, but a police station wasn’t the best place.

“Jaehyun.” You grabbed his arm once outside. “I know we-”

“You need a therapist.”

“What?”

“You need to talk to someone and realize they messed with you.”

“I…”

“Y/n!” 

    A familiar voice called out to you and when you looked back you could see Ten approaching you. It sparked joy, and you wanted to embrace him, but Jaehyun was quick to grab you and pull you back, making himself a barrier between the two of you.

“Stay away from her.”

“Jaehyun, we should talk.”

“I’m done hearing your lies, fucken creeps. Let’s go.”

    Jaehyun pulled you along, keeping a tight grip on you. All you could do was wave back at Ten, mouthing an apology, hoping to talk later. You went with Jaehyun, quietly following him back to this motel, not wanting to say anything and upset him. Now that you were in private though, there was no reason to keep quiet.

“I’m sorry for worrying you…”

“Worry? Seriously, y/n? I wasn’t worried about you, I was outta my fucken mind! You were dead! We all thought you were gone but I… I looked like a nutjob to anyone who would hear me say that wasn’t true. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad I was right, but what the fuck! Why did you supposedly fake your own death! Why did you lie to the police about those two assholes who-”

You couldn’t help the tears. “Cause I was lonely!”

“What?”

“I was alone and… I just wanted to start over!”

“What do you mean alone? You have me! Your family! Your friends!”

“Is that what you think? I’m here in this town all by myself! I don’t really have friends, you should know that. After all, you talked to the whole fucken campus while you were looking for me. And family?” You scoffed. “You’re the only one who bothered to come here and get my things… you’re the only one who entertained the idea I was still alive…”

“You were all set to transfer, the last time we spoke you seemed fine.”

“Yeah… I got good at lying…”

“Y/n… what happened, what did those guys do to you?”

“Oh I don’t know, acknowledge me? Be my friend? Care about me?”

“They kidnapped you!”

“I faked my own death! And I asked them to hide me until I figured out my next move.”

“Are you listening to yourself right now? This doesn’t sound like you! You’d never do something like this!”

“People change, Jaehyun!” You took a breath. “Thanks for coming by and what not, but I’m okay. So, I’ll just-”

“No, no, no, no, no. You’re staying here, with me. I am not letting you anywhere near those two until you get your head on straight.”

“You can’t-”

“Watch me!”

“Really? You’re acting childish.”

“Y/n… please…” Jaehyun approached you and pulled you into a hug. “Think about this from my perspective. My friend… was suddenly gone… despite how happy they seemed to be… I couldn’t even process it for a few days… I didn’t want to believe they were gone so bad that I was willing to suffer and hope they were alive… even if everyone around me pitied me… so imagine how I felt while I searched… knowing deep down what I was likely to find…”

“Jaehyun…” 

“Imagine how I felt when I actually found you… trapped by two psychos… I found you but… what have they done to you…”

“Jae…”

“Please… just stay… I just got you back… please…” 

♥♥♥♥♥

    Despite everything Jaehyun was still your friend, and you didn’t want to hurt him anymore than you already did, so you stayed.

“What now?”

“We get you home. I’m sure your family will be happy to see you.”

“That makes one of us.”

“They’ll be happy.”

“I…” You mumbled. “… Jaehyun… I want to stay.”

“Stay? You mean go back to them.”

“I don’t really have anything else…”

“You have me, and if you really want a fresh start we can start by getting out of this town. We can go on a vacation, and try all kinds of things.”

“Then why are we still here?”

“Cause I don’t have a car.”

“You don’t… how did you get here then?”

“I had a friend drop me off. I figured I was gonna be here for awhile, and I’d just take a bus back, but things have changed.”

“What if… what if I don’t want to go?”

“We already talked about this.”

“No, you talked, I never agreed or disagreed with you. I want to stay here.”

“Y/n-” 

“I don’t want to debate this with you.”

    Jaehyun sighed, taking a moment to think before pulling up a chair. You weren’t sure what he was doing but then he took your hand.

“Y/n… I don’t understand you… so please… help me… help me understand. Why do you want to stay with them?”

“I already-”

“Okay, then tell me how you met?”

“How we met?”

“Yeah, how did you run into each other?”

“Um… my roommate took me to a party… I wasn’t really having a good time so I stepped out… when Ten and Johnny were leaving we ran into each other. They took me out to get some hot chocolate and then invited me to their studio. We took some pictures, and then they took me home.”

“Okay, I remember you sending me those pictures, you had fun.”

“Yeah, I did.”

“So how did you wind up in their house?”

“Uh… they invited me over for dinner…”

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“What was the occasion for dinner? Had you already thought to fake your own death and were going to ask them for help?”

“Jae-”

“Just tell me why.”

“I… we got into a fight… and dinner was their form of apology.”

“What was the fight about?”

“Johnny… he was hitting on me and… I thought it was inappropriate.”

“And you went?”

“Yes… they’re my friends… I didn’t want to lose them over something stupid.”

“Being harassed is a good reason to cut ties with people.”

“I was giving mixed signals, it was my fault.”

“I don’t believe that for a second. But did you go to the dinner that night planning to ask them for help?”

“I… what?”

“When did you decided to kill yourself then?”

“Um…”

“You only knew those two for like… a few weeks, and you trusted they would help you? How did you want them to help you?”

“What?”

“What did you tell them to do? What was your plan?”

“I don’t-”

“When did you decide to fake your death?”

“I don’t know!”

“That’s a very important decision, it was your idea, or so you tell me. Shouldn’t you know all this?”

“I…”

“It’s strange isn’t it… that you don’t remember…”

“What’s your point?”

“Was it really your idea? Or is that how they messed with you?”

“…”

“I’m not trying to make you feel bad… I just want you to think about your situation… and how you wound up here… it doesn’t feel right, especially now.” Jaehyun got up. “We can go get a car tomorrow, the nearest place is two hours on the bus.”

“And then we’re leaving…”

“No, I want to stick around until you’re… resurrected, the police said I’d be a few days. Or at least I’ll check in to make sure the paperwork is done.”

“…”

“I’ll order some food and then you can get some sleep.”

♥♥♥♥♥

“We shouldn’t have let her go.”

“Oh, does someone miss her already?”

    Ten chuckled, the two boys laying in the bed of the basement room. When you went to the police, it was no surprise the two were asked to come down to the station. They weren’t worried about anything, since they were expecting this. They weren’t questioned, given your statement, but Johnny stuck around to chat with some officers, small town after all. Ten waited outside, happy to see you, but he expected that Jaehyun wouldn’t let you near him.

“This was a stupid plan.”

“Do you not trust me?”

“I do… Ten, you know I do… I just don’t trust she’ll be okay without us.”

“It’s just for a while.”

“And what are we supposed to do till then? What’s the next part of your brilliant plan, since you haven’t shared the details with me?”

“Hm… tell me, have you thought about moving?”

“Moving? Now? What the hell are you talking about?”

“Don’t you think it’s time for a change? This little town has been comfortable, but I’ve always wanted to live in a big city.”

“Am I missing something here?”

“Yes, silly.” Ten kissed Johnny. “Let’s get our things and move somewhere else, start fresh. We have the money, we can move our careers anywhere, and we’ll take our doll with us.”

“Oh… yeah, I suppose it’s time for a change. This place served its purpose.”

“Let’s get started. I have a few places in mind.”

♥♥♥♥♥

    You sat at the small table with Jaehyun, the TV on in the background, it was really just noise. He had ordered some take out, but you weren’t eating, just staring at the utensils.

“Y/n… are you okay?”

“Huh? Yeah… yeah I’m fine.”

    You grabbed the utensils, hand shaking a bit. It’s been a while since you actually ate on your own, you didn’t realize how easy it was to fall out of practice. You stared at your own hand perplexed, not really understanding how something so ridiculous happened. Of course Jaehyun could see you struggling. He reached over and grabbed your hand, lowering it.

“What did they do to you?”

“They were nice… and they looked after me…”

“… I’m sorry…”

“For what?”

“For not being there… for not realizing something was wrong.”

“I’m fine.” You pulled your hand away. “You had nothing to worry about.”

“Y/n… you realize… your feelings… it’s just stockholm syndrome.”

“It’s not, don’t talk like that.”

“Deep down, you know-”

“Shut up! You caught me, good for you, why don’t you just leave me if you’re going to be like this?”

“Seriously? I am not abandoning you after all this. You don’t even know them.”

“And you do?”

“I know they’re psychos. Ever since they moved here, there’s been a lot of strange cases involving girls like you.”

“Like me?”

“Young, university, girls. Do you have any idea the kinda shit they’ve done?”

“If that’s true, there’d be evidence! They’d be behind bars!”

“This is a small town, and they’re well respected. There wasn’t even an investigation into your death. You want evidence? Look in the mirror, the shit they did to you, tell me honestly they didn’t do questionable things to you?”

    You covered your ears, not wanting to hear this nonsense Jaehyun was throwing at you. He was lying, but something in the back of your mind was putting pieces together, and clearing away this fog you didn’t even realize you were living in. You ran to the bathroom, since it was the only place you could go to get away from him. 

    Once you got up and slammed the door he cursed himself out. He was right, he knew that, so he shouldn’t be picking fights and try to get you to understand like this. He got up and knocked on the door, apologizing for being so aggressive. There was no response so he merely sat against the door, not wanting you to be alone, not even to feel alone.

“I didn’t do a good job taking care of you, but I will now. We’ll figure this out, together.”

    You obviously didn’t stay in the bathroom for long, eventually going out and eating quietly, refusing any help. Jaehyun didn’t say anything, knowing you needed space, so he just watched TV, always keeping an eye on you. When night came, you borrowed some of his clothes, not really having anything else to wear. It was weird to sleep in a bed without Johnny or Ten. You couldn’t really sleep, which worked in your favor.

    You waited until you were sure Jaehyun was asleep, slowly getting up, grabbing your shoes, and creeping out of the room. All you had to do was get back to the boys, but you underestimated yourself a bit. Once you were outside, you realized you didn’t actually know where you were, or where to go. Still, that couldn’t stop you. After thinking about your options, you went to the front desk of the motel, asking the manager how to get to the nearest bus stop.

    They were very helpful, and it gave you confidence in getting back home, where you were wanted and loved. When you stepped out of their office though, you were grabbed, meeting Jaehyun’s gaze. He looked tired, scared, worried, but overall relieved he found you. He didn’t say anything and instead dragged you along back to the room. You didn’t speak either, feeling embarrassed. He had you get back in bed, grabbing a chair and putting it in front of the door. He wrapped a blanket around himself and sat down.

“Really…”

“You’re a danger to yourself.” Jaehyun yawned. “I should have realized that sooner.”

“I’m not a kid.”

“You don’t realize those two twist the truth, and have messed with your head. I can’t really trust you right now.”

“Jaehyun!”

“I know, and I’m sorry. Try to get some sleep, please.”

♥♥♥♥♥

    Once you fell asleep, you really got some rest, realizing you never really got to sleep in before. Jaehyun still managed to get some sleep too, despite the unusual position. He woke early in the morning to the sound of you whimpering. He was quickly out of his chair and at your side, stirring you awake. After a moment your eyes shot open, taking in a sharp breath. You were shaking, looking around, clearly disoriented.

“Hey, look at me, I’m right here.” Jae tried to calm you. “I’m here, you’re safe.”

“I’m sorry… I’ll behave…”

“What?”

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry…”

“No, no, hey, y/n, you don’t have to apologize, you’ve done nothing wrong. Deep breathes okay, in and out.”

“Jaehyun…”

“Yeah, yeah it’s me, I’m right here.”

“Where am I… what’s going on?”

“You’re in a motel with me.”

“A motel… no… no I… where are they… they’re gonna be mad… they’re gonna-”

“No, no, no, don’t think like that, they’re not here, they’re not gonna find you or hurt you, I got you, I’m here.”

    Jaehyun pulled you into his arms, rubbing your back, and gently rocking you to the sides. You did eventually calm down, and fell back asleep in his arms. He didn’t move for a while, not wanting to wake you, but your words rang in his head. Something was definitely wrong, and something bad had happened to you. He gently laid you back down in bed, staying by your side. He was dozing off himself when his stomach growled.

    A chuckle escaped his lips, and he got up, quietly getting dressed and stepping out so he wouldn’t accidentally wake you. He needed to get you out of this town, but he didn’t think taking a long bus ride was a good idea right now. He ordered some food and stayed outside, waiting. After getting the food he went back in, seeing that you were still asleep, and not in distress. He ate quietly, thinking he should wake you up to eat.

“Hey… breakfast is here… you should eat while it’s hot…”

“Hm… okay…”

    You slowly got up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. You made your way over to the table, sitting down and eating, hands shaking once again.

“What did they do…”

“Hm?”

“A while ago… you said you would behave… that you needed to go back… or they’d be mad…”

“What?”

“You don’t remember?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You were half asleep, so that makes sense… but you didn’t just spit out nonsense, that came from somewhere…”

“I’m fine…”

“If they really messed with your head… now that they’re not around… things are gonna surface…”

“They didn’t-”

“It’s possible. I don’t like it either, but… you were scared…”

“They’re good… people… they wouldn’t hurt me…”

“But they could… and people can manipulate you in ways to think they’re not actually hurting you. Did you think more about what I said yesterday?”

“It’s all fuzzy.”

“And how do you feel about that?”

“I… I don’t know…” Your voice cracked. “I don’t know what’s going on…”

“That’s okay, it takes time to heal. If you’re not up for it, we don’t have to get the car today.”

“No… I… I could use some fresh air…”

“Alright, finish up and we can go.”

“We will come back here… right?”

“Yes. We kinda have unfinished business here.”

♥♥♥♥♥

    The bus ride wasn’t that long, but you still dozed off. Jaehyun let you sleep on his shoulder, way more worried about you now than before. You were quiet on the journey, just following Jae around and then riding in the passenger seat back. He couldn’t imagine what was going through your head, and he didn’t know how to talk with you. At least you weren’t trying to run off again, so he was glad for that.

“Can we stop to get some medicine… my heads been killing me…”

“Yeah, of course.”

    Once you were back in town Jaehyun stopped at a convenience store to get you some medicine. You took it in the car, getting back to the motel and going straight to bed. You needed to lie down, let the medicine take effect. It was aggravating to just be waiting, and you weren’t even sure for what.

“I’ll stop by the police station tomorrow, see how things are going.”

“Yeah… why did you… what did you find…”

“Huh?”

“You broke into their house… for a reason…”

“I don’t know if now is the time for that story.”

“Please… my head… I feel anxious and relieved all in one and… I don’t know what’s right…”

“Are you sure…”

“I need something… tangible right now…”

“Well, I don’t really have evidence…”

“But you found me because of something, what was it?”

“I… while investigating your… disappearance, I found other strange cases surrounding girls your age, and when I asked around, a lot of those girls were known to be around Johnny and Ten… then I found your clothes in their studio… so I had to check… I didn’t know if I’d find anything… but I did, and I’m glad.”

“…”

“Are you okay?”

“My time with them… it’s fuzzy… and…” There were tears on your face. “I’m scared…”

“I know.”

    Jae went over to the bed and laid down with you. Nothing felt right, and you couldn’t even trust yourself. You wanted to talk to the boys, with Jaehyun around, so you could figure out the truth from their words, but you knew Jaehyun would never allow it. If bad things had really happened, you were scared to know what they were.

    The next morning you woke up alone, a note from Jaehyun telling you he went to the station. He also made a note of asking you not to leave, wanting to trust you. If you left you knew he’d get worried, and you didn’t want to do that to him. You also didn’t trust yourself to be out in town when you weren’t sure of the truth. You took some more medicine for the headache you were having and decided to take a shower. When you got out, Jaehyun was back.

“How’d it go?”

“As expected, they haven’t even started. They would today, and said by the end of the week everything should be in order.”

“So we’re staying.”

“Yeah… I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault, it’s mine.”

“It’s not yours either. I’m glad you want to leave with me, and I’m sorry we can’t.”

“I don’t know what I want… or what’s right…”

“If you want to talk through it, I’ll shut up and listen.”

“I’m not sure I want to do that.”

“Then let’s just find ways to pass the time.”

♥♥♥♥♥

“Have you dealt with the studios yet?”

“I cleared them out, stuff is in boxes and labelled in the moving truck.”

“And they’re on the market?”

“I’ve spoken with the real estate agent, it’s all good.” Johnny assured. “And here?”

“A lot is packed. Just need a few more things. I don’t suppose you’ve found our doll?”

“Not yet.”

“Hm, how hard can it be?”

“I’m sorry, baby, I wanted to make sure everything else was good before we got our doll back.”

“So you’ll find her now?”

“It’d be easy. Jaehyun is staying in a motel somewhere, there’s only so many around our town. I’ll make some calls tomorrow and see if I can’t find him.” 

“Good. With the way everything is going, we should be out of here by the end of the week, she’ll be the last thing we pick up.”

“Are you sure moving is a good idea. This place is cozy.”

“You bring this up now?”

“I’m joking, silly.” Johnny pulled Ten in for a kiss. “This place has always been too quiet, a city will be more fun, and we’ll be complete.”

“Oh, so poetic.”

“Yeah, and I really want to take you to bed, but we can’t waste time… and I’m sure the bedroom has been cleaned out.”

“Yup, so be a good boy, and be patient. I promise you’ll get a great reward later.”

“I like the sound of that.”

“So don’t tempt me, we still have much to do.”

♥♥♥♥♥

    You woke up screaming, grabbing your head, your body shaking, the lingering feeling of being electrocuted very present. Your nights began to fill with flashes of the past, flashes of pain. It was all an incoherent mess, but the pieces were enough to tell you things weren’t right. So much of your time with Johnny and Ten wasn’t clear outside of feeling happy, and you were realizing why. Your scream had startled Jaehyun awake, but you paid him no mind, not until he was at your side checking up on you.

“Deep breathes. They’re not here.”

“I’m sorry… I don’t… sorry…”

“Sh, just focus on the present, where are you now? Do you know?”

“I… I’m with you… we’re in a motel…”

“Yes, yes that’s right.”

“I’m sorry…”

“What are you sorry for? What happened?”

“I didn’t listen… they… they had to… teach me…”

“Teach you what?”

“To behave… it’s all fuzzy… they were nice… because I didn’t remember… the bad… I don’t want to know the bad… Jaehyun-”

“I’m sorry.” He hugged you. “I’m sorry, we’ll get out of here as soon as possible.”

“I don’t want to remember…”

“Y/n, we need to go to the police, tell them-”

“No! No, I can’t… they won’t believe me… not after what I said…”

“And why did you say it?”

“I don’t know… I thought… I thought it was right… but it… I don’t know where that came from…”

“Then when we get out of here we can start an investigation ourselves okay, they won’t get away with this.”

“I’m sorry, Jaehyun…”

“It’s not your fault, it’s not your fault… do you want me to go get you some sleeping meds?”

“Yeah…” You sniffled. “That’d be nice…”

“Okay. I’ll be right back, there’s a convenience store across the street, I won’t be long.”

    You nodded your head, staying put as Jaehyun left. He was trying to be quick about it, not wanting you to be alone for too long, but on his way back to his room, the manager called out to him, saying he had a call. It was strange, but it seemed urgent, so he went to the office to answer it, being left alone for privacy.

“Hello?”

“I hope you haven’t been a dick to her.”

“What do you want?”

“You’ve been good right? She’s a delicate thing, easy to hurt.”

“Fuck you.”

“Language.” Ten chuckled over the line. “I thought we were friends.”

“We’re not.”

“Shame, I was hoping we could get along, talk about this, but you’re not interested, are you?”

“Absolutely not. Stay away from me, and stay away from her.”

“Now why would I do that? She’s my… hm… what’s the best word? Girlfriend.”

“She’s nothing to you! Understand.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night. I was honestly surprised you were still in town, but I guess somethings can’t be left to chance.”

“We’ll be out of your way soon enough.”

“But how can I just let my girl run off with you? I’m sure she’s been missing us dearly.”

“She hasn’t, and you’ll pay for what you did.”

“Who’s going to believe you? What proof do you have that we’ve done anything at all?”

“She’s proof.”

“She’s unreliable.”

“Don’t call me again.”

“Oh, I won’t, promise.”

    The line went dead. Jaehyun dropped the phone on the table, storming back over to his room. He took a breath outside, not wanting to come in hot and worry you. As he opened the door he felt someone come up from behind and hit him over the head. The door creaked open, and his world faded to black.

♥♥♥♥♥

    You were curled up in bed, somewhat mentally beating yourself for having been so stupid. You were so easy to trust them, and it went wrong so fast. When you heard the door opened you perked up, and then your eyes went wide when you saw Jaehyun collapse, a masked individual standing in the doorway. You screamed and got out of bed, still a bit unsteady. You tried to run for the bathroom, to lock yourself in there and hide, but the intruder was quick.

    You continued to scream and kick, trying to break free, but this person was big and strong. You cried out for Jaehyun to wake up and help you, but he was out cold. The attacker wound up pinning you to the bed, and you watched as someone else walked in. Your fighting had died down, but when the door shut, and you got a better looked at the masked men in the room, you put two and two together. You screamed again, a rush of adrenaline giving you another chance, but it wasn’t enough. The other man approached and took off the mask.

“Easy, baby girl, nothing bad is gonna happen.”

“Please… just let me go… I won’t say anything… I haven’t!”

“I know, you’re a good girl like that, but how can we just leave you behind?”

“Huh? You… you’re not going to kill me?”

“No, no, no, absolutely not. What makes you think we would do such a thing?”

“I… just let me go… please…”

“Hm… we’ve missed you, have you been okay?”

“Let me go!”

“Feisty, perhaps we can talk later, once you’re home.”

“What? No! No! No, please!”

    Johnny kept you pinned down, grabbing your head and turning it to the side. You saw a flash of a needle, feeling a prick in your neck.

“No! Please, don’t! I won’t say anything! I won’t-”

“Sh, everything’s going to be okay, baby. Trust us, we know what’s best.”

“Please…”

    Your eyelids were growing heavy, and you knew you wouldn’t be awake for much longer. Tears streamed down your cheeks, your eyes looking over at Jaehyun on the floor, unaware of everything that was happening. You were barely conscious as Johnny picked you up in his arms, carrying you out.

“You’ll be just fine with us.”

    You were put into the backseat of their car, reminiscent of the first night you had met them, waking up in the back seat after the photoshoot. They both pressed a kiss to your head, smiles on their face, Ten dressing you with a hat and mask.

“Sweet dreams, doll. Dream of us.”

♥♥♥♥♥

    Jaehyun awoke with a headache, the details on how he ended up on the floor a bit hazy. He slowly got up, recognizing the room as his, and realizing he was alone. He called for you, but there was no response. He managed to get up, stumbling to the bathroom, but it was empty. When he grabbed his head he could feel a bump, but no blood, which was a good sign. The room was small, so if you weren’t there, then you were gone.

    He started to remember what happened, the phone call, and then being attacked. He was quick to put the pieces together and head out, having a pretty good idea of where you had gone, whether it was willingly or not. He rolled up to Johnny and Ten’s house, furiously knocking on the door, screaming at them to open up. There was no response, and as he was making his way to the backyard, someone called out to him.

“Excuse me! What are you doing?”

“I need to get into this house, these-”

“Oh, are you my morning appointment?”

“What?”

“Come on, I can show you around.”

    The person walked up to the house, unlocking the front door with a key. They gestured for him to follow, and he did so cautiously. As soon as he stepped in his heart sank, the place was empty, and you were nowhere to be found.

“I…”

“I know, this place is pretty nice.”

“What… what happened to the previous owners?”

“Moving on to better things. Now this place is pretty spacious and-”

“Where did they go?”

“Excuse me?”

“The couple that lived here a few days ago! Where did they go!”

“I… I’m sorry but I don’t know, and even if I did, it’s not information… excuse me!”

    Jaehyun just turned on his heels and rushed out, looking around as if he’d find the answer. They were gone, which meant you were gone too, far beyond his reach. He couldn’t even begin to imagine where you were, or how much fear you were probably feeling. He found you, only to lose you all over again, and this time, he had no way or tracking you down. He was back where he started, alone and looking for you, far more scared than he could ever imagine.

[cattles-bians]

exes au part 11

post directory

obsetress: i'm about to fully fall asleep but i have been thinking about exes au danvi and like the isabel of it all and dani dating a single mom and how just like

obsetress: vi is so protective of isabel and as much as she loves dani like

obsetress: she took SO LONG before introducing her and then like

obsetress: when they broke up dani left and dani wasnt in isabels life anymore and dani was so good for isabel and viola just feels so fuckin shitty and blames herself and

obsetress: but i'm also thinkin bout soft fluffy stuff too like how much dani loves isabel and how much vi loves watching isabel w dani and

em: hey hannah what the fuck

obsetress: isabel has a nightmare one night and goes to her mom's room and dani's there too and she just curls up between them

em: do you think when they finally reconnected dani was like hey um. does isabel remember me. would it be weird if

obsetress: FUCK

obsetress: this absolutely happens

em: viola is VERY apprehensive at first

obsetress: god yeah esp after getting so hurt by it but

obsetress: viola sure cannot say no to dani!

em: i love some dani with kids tho

em: maybe too soft but do u think for at least a couple years dani would like. send isabel a bday card

em: like dead air otherwise

em: hmm idk i am chewing that one over more

obsetress: god it's hard i think dani wants to but she doesn't

obsetress: i could see dani writing them and holding onto them

em: oh that’s even worse

obsetress: even tho she really doesnt think she'll ever talk to vi again

em: what a soft and depressing thought. thank u. i resent u.

obsetress: yeah it hurts!

obsetress: but then she does! and she gives them all to isabel when she's older maybe

em: hold on i’m gonna bawl

em: sometimes my parents will be like um. do u remember this person and i’m like uh i don’t remember people i worked w two years ago let alone

em: but i think isabel does

em: i will be thinking about this all afternoon bestie have a wonderful slumber

[em note: em yells in hannahs DMs while she's asleep dot png]

em: no um. mate im still furious about the isabel of it all wtf

em: thinking about um. like ok i dont wanna use isabel as a prop but this is certainly one of those times where

em: violas been hurt before and viola's hurt other people before because she's deeply troubled and i feel like that would be one of the first times she sorta. sure she licks her wounds and feels miserable for herself but its also like uh

em: really sobering to realise This Hurts Isabel Too

em: because yknow violas very gatekeep gaslight girlboss i think shes got a strong enough sense of self that nothing really shakes that. maybe even to a deluded degree. i dont think she goes to therapy because shes like wow im fucked up i gotta get help, she's more like

em: shes really driven by her love for isabel!! gestures WILDLY

em: realised this is an au where parents get therapy and dont pass their traumas onto their kids and i want OFF this WILD RIDE im so tired of discovering things about myself through the realm of fiction

obsetress: yeah same i kept thinking about it too alfkadlsfkjdasf

obsetress: i want to reply to every single line of the isabel thing but i'm not gonna do that so let me just say: YEAH

obsetress: like isabel is her cornerstone full stop everything comes down to isabel

em: dani's probably so nervous reconnecting w isabel again. absolutely spinning her lil wheels

em: they set up a lil date and time and dani's doing her gay nervous babble abt if isabel even remembers her or god forbid resents her n jamies like...

em: im pursing my lips as i draw a line on the whiteboard between jamie's whole childhood and isabels and shaking my head Goddamn It

em: jamie lets dani babble it out n pauses and reflects on what she's saying n then jamie's like. the fact ur nervous means u care. n kids are v good at picking up when ppl care. you'll be alright.

obsetress: god yeah this bit i can just. hear it

obsetress: it's so visceral

---

em: viola

obsetress: god my favorite taurus hedonist

[em note: hannah yells in em's DMs while em is asleep dot png]

obsetress: god fuck what was i thinking about isabel this morning like

obsetress: that's what i get for daydreamin between snoozes and not writing it down alas

obsetress: but just like how excited isabel is to see dani again when she does and also like, isabel and rebecca

obsetress: then i started thinking about

obsetress: rebecca and vi getting married and vi's always like i'm not gonna get married again it's bullshit and rebecca's like it's not for me but then they just

obsetress: like they live together and they share everything and rebecca looks out for isabel just as much and they get to a point and it's like

obsetress: oh. oh

obsetress: like they're both like it's the logical thing to do. it's logical and it's safe and we should have this extra layer of protection but also it's like

obsetress: they find themselves more and more excited a lil you know? and just thinking about how isabel's there and how excited isabel is and

obsetress: but god yeah what i was thinking about this morning like. one day vi has to tell isabel dani's not gonna be coming around anymore and like

obsetress: isabel doesn't really understand and she's so sad and then vi feels even shittier

obsetress: and she's like "we'll be okay. it's you and me, remember? moving mountains"

obsetress: "you me us, right?"

obsetress: the first time rebecca meets her she brings her a book as a gift and is like "this was one of my favorites" and

obsetress: OH I REMEMBERED

obsetress: so like when dani sees isabel again finally (and yknow as nervous as dani was vi was even more on edge because it's so inconsistent and is she gonna understand yknow? and the two of them just spiral––which is also another thing about the two of them in a relationship! i think they push each other down spirals)

obsetress: jamie's there too and dani's like "this is... this is, uh, jamie" and it's like you said jamie isabel parallels and so jamie's like a lil tender

obsetress: spoiler: isabel and jamie end up bonding the most

obsetress: jamie's like running around with isabel on her shoulders and then showing her all these plants and taking her to gardens and

obsetress: another tentative jamie vi alliance

em: isabel mikey hangout When

obsetress: isabel mikey hangout!

obsetress: they're hanging with isabel and she and jamie have a very spirited discussion where isabel's like "i wanna be a princess" and dani's like "why not a knight?" and jamie's like "why not opt out of the feudalistic hierarchy entirely and ditch the kingdom for the high seas?" and convinces isabel to go full pirate

obsetress: and then isabel kinda passes out with her head in jamie's lap and jamie's just kinda idly playing with her hair (vi is already like "am i... attracted to jamie in this moment?")

obsetress: and jamie's like "y'know, i should bring mikey round next time isabel's here" and viola's like "......who?" and jamie's like "my little brother? mikey?" and viola's like "right.... right"

obsetress: cut to later, when dani and jamie have retired to vi and becca's guest room: "since when does jamie have a little brother?" "she always has, babe"

em: kinda obsessed w like. violas love for isabel means her wires get crossed when the surly gardener is Good With Kids

obsetress: yeah

obsetress: mikey and isabel immediately hit it off i think

obsetress: a bit of an odd couple because i think isabel is definitely, like, her mother's daughter and mikey is............. mikey

obsetress: but i think they meet in the middle and help each other grow and play pirates together

em: viola is like. of course mikey and isabel will get along. isabel is wonderful. but jamie is quietly Sweating about the whole thing

em: so damvibecca are having their afternoon tea and their little cakes and jamie is Quietly sweating and she’s like ‘quiet is good, right? like they’re not tryna k-‘ and then there’s the sound of two 8 year olds (idk how old they are tbh) YELLING as they chase each other down the hall w wrapping paper tubes

obsetress: nervous babbling dani x quietly sweating jamie, an otp

em: isabel has gotten into the make up n given them both black eyes n scars and moustaches n everyone’s like oh no how’s viola gonna feel about this but viola is DELIGHTED

obsetress: dani's like "chill you all she's gonna––" and then viola is getting up and asking them to do her face too

em: made a parrot outta a sock and newspaper

obsetress: viola playing pirates w isabel and mikey

em: kids w their endless creativity n absolute disregard for personal property is truly a thing of dreams

obsetress: mikey gives her a paper tube and she disarms isabel, takes hers, and offers it very seriously to jamie

em: cuteeee

obsetress: rebecca's giving dani a look and dani is completely unfazed and reaching for another tea cake

em: absolutely unflappable dani clayton

em: dani and rebecca sharing a Look like hey have you ever seen her this gleeful

obsetress: there is something very tasty about jamie taylor having a direct hand in making viola so gleeful

em: takes a village!

obsetress: when viola's two big loves are sitting five feet away from them both

em: everyone changes everyone for the better

em: fucken soft ass chat over here

obsetress: everyone changes everyone for the better

obsetress: soft as hell

em: thesis statement everyone likes each other so much (jamie pretends she doesn’t)

obsetress: (jamie pretends she doesn't) (jamie might like everyone the most)

obsetress: viola registers mikey for isabel's school n pays full tuition

em: oh my god

obsetress: jamie is horrified and refuses to accept it and viola waves a hand and is like "too late, deposit's non-refundable"

em: (they carpool)

obsetress: PLEASE

obsetress: oh god and like

obsetress: flora and miles go there too

obsetress: full circle complete

em: broke: highschool au woke: guardians of primary schoolers au

obsetress: dani jamie in bed jamie's like "you don't...... think it's weird?" "hmm?" "mikey going to.... school with our boss' kids?" "why would that be weird" "i dunno" "he also goes to school with my ex's kid" "he's best friends with your ex's kid" "and that's not weird, is it?" (grumbles) "not anymore" "so why would this be?"

em: jamie’s ribbing mikey for his silly tie and straw hat but she teaches him how to tie a tie and also she keeps crying for some reason???

obsetress: oh fuck

em: mikey: can’t i just get a fake tie >:/

jamie: no because when u have a real tie you can leave it untied a little as an act of rebellion

obsetress: god it's jamie crying for me

em: i love that big baby

obsetress: so much!

em: jamies like idk what’s gotten into me i never cry n danis like. raises one eye brow and mentally checks off all the times jamie has absolutely bawled watching a movie

em: not even a sad movie

em: dani plays along

em: maybe ur getting soft in ur old age jamie

obsetress: jamie i cry three four times a day five if i'm being honest taylor

em: thinking about their weekly weekend lunch w damvibecca and hannah and owen and miles and flora and

obsetress: dfjsldkfjslfslfj

obsetress: god big found family

obsetress: you know viola doesn't like

obsetress: dani and jamie respectfully toe around whatever the fuck owen and hannah have going on but viola just does not suffer it. she's so blunt to them

em: big viola grin and all ‘owen, hannah, i assume you will be each other’s dates?’ (owen chokes on his tiny egg sandwich)

em: hannah grose is serene and unreadable as she dabs a bit off yolk off owens moustache

em: maybe even a bit pleased

obsetress: everyone is always so tense when viola and hannah get together because neither of them take shit yknow

obsetress: and everyone's like "which way is this gonna go"

em: god. peak snarky broads

obsetress: but usually they end up good. two apex predators where one is a lil vicious but the other is so confident in its status that it just chills

em: they have the Best gossip

obsetress: would love to sit in and listen as they drink tea and gossip tbh

em: viola presses owen on hannah and he goes red and viola presses hannah on owen and she does a little wouldnt-you-like-to-know into her tea

em: viola nee willoughby and hannah grose friendship is. truly something i never knew i needed until now

em: they’re both just that lil bit older than the rest of the gang too

obsetress: an important coalition

obsetress: hannah grose! hannah looking out for rebecca and that's the couple times she gets a lil testy w vi

obsetress: mikey and isabel besties but flora and mikey get along really well and isabel and miles do too i think

em: the sheer chaos of a taylor-lloyd-windgrave story time

obsetress: LDKFjKLSDJF HELP

obsetress: taylor lloyd wingrave story time

obsetress: jamie suddenly very invested in story time

obsetress: dani's like "i know this is the first time you've actually cared about story time, babe, so let me give you some pointers"

em: i was just in my head thinking fondly about like. jamie is a drop out and plays a lil dumb sometimes for fun but also prolly reads a lot especially to mikey and now i’m like. wait i’m talking to Ms Floras Two Moms herself

em: idk if i had that headcanon before i read she taught me a lesson alright but yknow what! doesn’t matter it’s a beautiful one

obsetress: thank youuuu i love it a lot

obsetress: jamie big reader is generally one of my fave headcanons tbh i'm glad it seems to be widely accepted. can't even explain why it's just nice

em: sometimes i will talk 2 ppl about my passionate drop out jamie taylor belief n then they’re like but she’s smart (it’s only happened a couple times hahsj) and i’m like these aren’t mutually exclusive!! this is my very biased experience but my friends who do manual labor for a living seem to read so much more than my friends who don’t

em: your brain wants to chew over things while the hands are workin i reckon

obsetress: yes yes yes yes yes

obsetress: i think that's also like (sighs heavily)

obsetress: symptomatic of hegemonic perceptions of the working class

em: i love when u sigh heavily it’s always a fun take

obsetress: i think jamie is v clever and reflective and like if there's one thing i've learned getting older it's

obsetress: smart doesn't matter i think the most insightful most thoughtful people are the most reflective ones

obsetress: like none of it fuckin matters just be a nice person

[mylifeisanexperiment]

Journaling

Hello my beautiful Tumblr friends.

In my last long post I filled you guys in on how I was dealing w/ sadness about losing my ex as a best friend. How I felt myself grieving his loss again. But then COVID hit hard at work making me feel so many emotions. Something I was not ready for or felt capable to handle under my current mental state. I don't work in the hospital as some of you may know. I am a Registered Nurse that for over 14 years or more have been working in Hospice, Palliative, or end of life care as some call it. I visit patients in their homes or facilities where they may be residing to ensure they have a quality of life and are pain free in their final days. The job itself can be mentally taxing sometimes. I find myself being a therapist with families to try to get them to accept situations and provide emotional support. With Covid all these conversations have an added an extra layer of anxiety from them. I mean we have never gone through a pandemic. I was taught about it in school and jobs sometimes talk about that it may happen. But no sector of the healthcare industry was ready for this wave of COVID.

In March when the first wave was first identified a lot of Nursing homes had outbreaks and many patients died but many survived. My home patients seemed almost untouched as family members adhered to masks when we were around and we were ourselves as nurses were wearing masks. Things seemed a bit up for a while and well in the last two weeks covid hit our home population and their families hard . A lot of times the family member was sick and got tested and was positive. Shortly after the whole household was positive and also our patients. Families felt all the emotions you can think of from the “Could I have given it to my already dying mom?” or the “I cant see my mom because they won't let me in facility and now that she has covid I feel helpless.” All these conversations I was now having daily. Covid added a sadness to what some may already feel is a sad career I may have picked in end of life care.

But this was different. 

So here I was a grieving nurse trying to mend a broken heart while living alone while not trying to see my parents to protect them and being strong in front of all these families as they grieve the covid diagnosis and their fears. As It spread like wild fire, I got calls from team members. Bathing nurses looked to me for support as their case manager and again I was strong for them because they all needed me. I put all my feelings aside and felt so fucken sad when id get home. Id feel angry that my ex wasn't there to support me, anxiety about going to work, sadness for my patients and families, sadness for my coworkers, and now my friends were starting to deal with their parents getting covid and me listening to them.

I broke down and called my best friend and cousins wife who is a therapist and cried like a baby to them both. Separately. I had been holding all these emotions in. And I was spiraling trying to be strong for others even though I too was hurting and feeling all the emotions they were feeling. I too was scared.

They both supported me and validated my feelings. I felt better. I guess you can say I hit rock bottom there. 

I decided to start taking steps to help myself with these feelings and deal with the fear and anxiety that it has brought up with covid. I started to meditate and started saying positive affirmations to myself daily all day. I feel better but still have a lot of work to do on myself. This is definitely the hardest time in my career.

I decided to start journaling to. I realized I was having a hard time doing it. But then realized when I write to you guys I don't have problem. So here I am. Journaling.

You will see me more writing my thoughts down because I need to get to the other side of this crazy time.

I hope you are all safe and with your loved ones.

Thank you for reading this if you got this far.

:0)

[roguestarsailor]

One Day In December is such a good novel. I can’t believe I read the scorpio book recommendation and picked this up; whoever the astrologer person from the library is they really hit the mark. My god im literally sobbing. This is so goood!

Laurie and Jack have the most ordinary and mundane yet antsy and frustrating love story ever. I mean, this is a romcom so obviously they’ll end up together but the book spends like +300 pages making it seem impossible for that to happen! So many life moments that really shove them together but also tear them apart. So much unspoken tension!! So much unspoken truths!! so much to lose!! But as it near the ending and they’re both really figuring out their lives instead of finding distractions, or brushing aside feelings and red flags, and BOOM right in the feels. ahhh, i’ve never teared up for a love story before but I did for this! wow!!

“Might as well,” I grumbled. “My love life is official dead.”

Sarah screws up her finished-with fish-and-chip paper. “You’ve only got yourself to blame,” she says.

She’s referring to bus boy, of course. He’s reached near-mythical status now, and I’m on the very edge of giving up on him. Ten months is a long time to look for a complete stranger on the off-chance that they’ll be single, into me, and not an axe murderer. Sarah is of the vocal opinion that I need to move on, by which she means I need to find someone else before I turn into a nun. I know she’s right, but my heart isn’t ready to let him go yet. That feeling when we locked eyes--I’ve never had that before, ever.

i dog-eared this page because this is meeeeeeeeeeeee. not that ive ever had a love at first sight sighting in my entire life (but no one is gonna stop me from not making eye contact on public transport and hoping for the best!!). i love that Laurie is just as wistful; makes me feel better about myself (and makes me foolishly hopeful!!!) lol.

*spoilers*

Anyways, the time passage through this book was speedy; literally years pass as we read on. I was so anxious because its like long stretches of time passes and it literally takes years for them to officially get together. This is very different than other romcom books I’ve read since those generally is more quick to lead to the happy ending. And I guess it’s true. Love develops over time and at the same time, the time needed to *try* to get over someone but also figure yourself out as you age through your twenties. It’s never constantly spending time with someone either; its long stretches of time away from each other too. Most of the things that happen are really really mundane. It’s not grand, its not dramatic and its very quiet. Nobody makes quick decisions here and it’s so drawn out. 

It’s like how working at a job you hate can just escape you and you end up staying for too long. This book covers both the career stalemate and the love portion--staying in a relationship because you’ve built it and its actively choosing to keep it going even though it obvious not going to last. Even when Sarah and Laurie have their fall out, a good distance between time passes and I think that’s very normal. Even when they reunite again, its quiet and just casual and they slowly work back up to being the bestest friends again. Laurie and Jack relationship’s was actively trying not to engage with one another and it really showed--but its not completely radio silence nor intense heated moments. It’s fleeting because they both recognize that if they got together they would hurt Sarah, and then eventually Oscar and probably themselves the mostly. It’s watching them seeing the other person be with someone else or moving through life at a different speed and feeling like they’re too late and then having their paths diverge even more and then connecting at realizing the feelings are still here, and then diverging again and coming again. Their relationship is the definition of missed opportunities!!! But I think this is the most accurate account of adult relationships I’ve ever read so far and its really refreshing.

^ my literal face as i read the last few pages

*personal thoughts*

This gave me a really good insight into the world of dating and relationships and love. I am so used to reading these big grand things happening that the universe allow these two people to meet and create this magic. There’s the hurdles to jump through but they get through in the end and its implied that because they have the biggest element, which is love, means that they will be ok. They might have friends who root for them, they have little mice and birds to help them, so many elements in a typical romcom universe that pushes these two together. But this book was different.

As Jack dates Sarah, we know they don’t fit well but they stick it out. They actively try to date and get to know each other so they spend months to years dating. And its not that Jack only thinks about Laurie but rather its always in the background. Laurie tried to stay out of the way and Jack does the same. It’s wild to think that someone you have an almost instant connection with might not actually be what you want and you have to actively see the reality of the situation and actively live your life. To figure out if what you have with that person can technically work--makes it clear that a relationship IS work. It’s not passionate and fire! it’s very small, its texting every day and slowly giving a piece of yourself to this person. And its inconvenient as hell!!! Even Laurie being with Oscar, and actually getting married and trying to make married life work for them was mundane and average. There was no point where there was a dramatic STOP THE WEDDING, or like screaming “I Love You’s” and such for Laurie and Jack. Nobody was the bad guy and did the bad thing that made people realize that they don’t belong together; none of that! Oscar never cheated or became problematic, even Jack realized that have casual relationships wasn’t for him; nothing dramatic like that at all. Nobody actively objected to Laurie/Oscar’s union and nobody was actively rooting to get Jack and Laurie together. It had to be them, as individuals, choosing each other which is so fucken sweet and such a good expectation to have regarding romance love. Even though it started as a chance love at first sight moment, it ended up being them actively choosing and actively seeking out their own happiness and idea of what they want in life and then declaring it, separately, to each other that made them work as a couple. well there was a bit of a fanfare at the end of the book but it was cute. It was normal people! finding love! for each other!! I love this so much!!!

Songs to include in this Playlist I am 1000% gonna made for this book: invisible strings by Taylor Swift, Enchanted by Taylor Swift, gold rush by Taylor Swift, Speak Now by Taylor Swift, Permanent by Kygo, In Your Eyes by The Weekend, Heat Waves by Glass Animals, Just For A Moment by Gryffin, Iselin, Comeback by Carly Rae Jepsen, Bleachers, Don’t Give Up On Love by Kygo, Losing It Over You by Matoma, Ayme

[avasharpe]

Honey, There Is No Right Way Chapter Two

Chapter: two/four

Summary: The night after they defeat Charlie’s sisters is when the reality sets in. Sara was blind, permanently and she must adapt to her new disability.

Fandom: DC’s Legends of Tomorrow.

Relationship: Sara Lance/Ava Sharpe.

Characters: Sara Lance, Ava Sharpe, Gideon, Charlie, Mick Rory, Lita Rory, Zari Tarazi, and John Constantine.

Chapter Rating: General Audience.

Additional Tags: Blind!Sara, Fluff and Angst, The Smell (Charlie’s band).

Read at AO3

Read at FFN

……………………………………………………………………

They’re in the crowd of the warehouse listening to Charlie and their band play. The music took over all of Sara’s senses and the beat resonated in her chest. With the mosh pit and Charlie screaming in her ears, the only way she didn’t get lost was by holding Ava’s hand. The rest of the world is a blur of unfamiliar people and sound. 

They listened to music and Sara danced wildly. Ava stretched her arm out to do the wave and Sara felt someone move in between them, pushing at their arms until she let go. Sara stopped dancing and moved past them to try and reach for Ava, but no one was there. Sara called out to her, but no one responded and she got pushed further into the mosh pit until she was completely lost. 

Sara took a moment to ground herself. She called out for Ava again and for the other Legends, but none of them were there. No one else around her seemed to know where her friends were, but there was one person Sara could hear. Charlie was screaming into the microphone and Sara moved through the crowd. She followed Charlie’s voice until she bumped up against the stage, putting her hands on the platform. Charlie was halfway through the song and Sara knew she’d never get their attention until they finished. So Sara enjoyed the music and danced, but kept both of her hands on the stage.

When Charlie’s song was done, Sara waved her arm to get their attention and Charlie caught her hand. With the song over, the crowd quieted and Sara could hear Charlie talk.

“Hey boss, where’s Ava?”

“I don’t know. I got lost in the crowd. Can you see her?” 

“Not from up here. She’s probably back by the bar. Let’s go find her,” Charlie said as Sara heard them jump down into the crowd. Charlie gripped her hand and led her through the mosh pit. As soon as they got to the bar Charlie put her in a chair. Sara felt someone brushed up against her side and the sound of an intense make out.

“Oi, you two stop smashing faces for a second,” Charlie shouted and Sara reached out to tug on Constantine’s jacket.

“Oh pissed off Charlie,” John said.

“Sara, there you are,” Zari said, putting her hand on Sara’s arm. “Ava was looking for you, she said you got lost.”

“Yeah, we got separated in the crowd. You guys know where she is?”

“Hey boss,” Mick said, patting her on the back. Sara jumped a bit when he touched her. With everyone talking and Declan still playing some guitar riffs, it was hard to hear someone approach her. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s okay, have you seen Ava?” Sara asked, turning towards Mick.

“Yeah, she and Lita are outside looking for you,” Mick said, putting a hand on her shoulders.

Sara hopped off the barstool and put her hand on Mick’s arm. As they walked outside, she could hear more clearly. The door slammed behind them and the sound of the music and the crowd faded away. 

“Sara!” She heard Ava shout. 

“Aunt Sara!” Lita shouted.

“Ava over here,” Sara shouted back, cupping her hands over her mouth.

“Sara?” Ava asked as Sara heard her footsteps running towards them. The next thing she knew, Ava was slamming into her and wrapping her arms around her waist. “I thought I lost you. I was so worried.”

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” Sara insisted, untangling herself from Ava with a smile. “I got up to the stage and found Charlie, then we went to the bar and got Mick and he brought me out here.”

“You can’t let go of my hand like that, anything could have happened to you,” Ava said, putting her hands on Sara’s shoulders. “You could have been trampled in the crowd or I don’t know abducted by aliens or something.”

“Babe, I think you’re getting a little too ahead of yourself, I’m fine,” Sara insisted, putting her hand on Ava’s and giving them a squeeze.

“Yeah, this time, but what happens if you get lost while we’re on a mission. Something seriously bad could happen,” Ava said, running her hands up to hold Sara’s face. 

“That’s what the League training is for,” Sara said, leaning into Ava’s touch.

“Regardless, I’m not taking any chances. Here take this,” Ava said, putting a com in her ear and sticking something under Sara’s shirt on her spine. 

“What’s that?” Sara said, feeling for the small round chip Ava put on her back with her fingers.

“It’s a tracking device. That way I’ll always know where you are and…”

“What?” Sara shouted, ripping it off and handing it back to Ava. “I don’t need to be fucken, chipped. I’m not a child.”

“It’s just a precaution Sara,” Ava argued, rubbing her arms. “If you get lost again, we need to be able to find you.”

“I wasn’t lost,” Sara said, taking a step back and pulling away from Ava. “I made it to the stage and found Charlie by myself. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”

“Yeah, in a nightclub surrounded by all of our friends. What if I lose you while we’re in the middle of London in 1901 or if we get separated during a battle with our latest villain? How are you going to find your way back to the Waverider or to me?”

“I’ve got my phone and my bo. I can take care of any threat that I face, and then I’ll call Gideon for a ride.”

“Look Sara, it’s just an extra tool,” Ava said, putting the tracker in Sara’s hand, “Especially since you can’t navigate the world around you, yet.”

“I can and I’ll prove it,” Sara said, dropping the tracker and running away. She immediately tripped over a tire and fell onto the concrete, scraping her palms and her knees. 

“Sara wait,” Ava said, with a tone of sympathy that hurt more than her knees. Sara could hear her voice get closer. “This is what I’m talking about. I don’t want you hurting yourself.” 

Sara just got back up and kept running. She found a fence and like a child, she ran her fingers along it as she went. Sara made her way around the dark alleys, tripping over a multitude of things and nearly spraining her ankle in a pothole. She kept going until she couldn’t, until she was sure she was alone.

Sara leaned against the wall of the alleyway and held her ankle. She could feel that it was swollen and she could barely walk on it. All she could think about was how Ava was right. She couldn’t survive on her own. She would need help and admitting that was harder than anything. Sara pulled out her phone, dialing the Waverider.

“Gideon, can you pick me up please?”

“I am sending the Jump Ship to your location Captain.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course,” Gideon said before she promptly hung up.

Sara heard the telltale sound of the Jump Ship land next to her and carefully got up. Limping and going hands first until she felt the side of the plane, Sara found her way over to the entrance and quickly got in. She strapped herself into the seat as the Jump Ship took off. 

“Captain, I sense that you have been injured. I shall have a chair ready for you in the Med Bay to assess your ankle and the scrapes on your hands and knees.”

“Okay, thanks Gid,” Sara said as she disembarked from the Jump Ship and made her way over to the Med Bay.

Gideon fixed her up quickly and Sara went back to her room. She changed into a fresh pair of pajamas and fell into bed. 

“Hey Gideon,” Sara said, tilting her head up to the ceiling even though Gideon was just a voice and she was blind.

“Yes Captain?”

“Is there any kinda blind cane training stuff available?”

“Of course Captain, there are several schools for the blind in Star City that offers Orientation and Mobility training. They also offer Braille and essential skills training, including independent living, personal management, counseling, and peer support groups, all of which I would recommend.”

“Do you think you can help me get into one of these schools?” Sara asked, she wasn’t so sure about this whole thing, but she knew one thing. She wanted her independence back. Sara didn’t want to have to rely on those around her for the rest of her life.

“Of course Captain, I could set things up with one of the top schools in Star City and get an appointment for you to meet with them.”

“Thank you Gideon,” Sara said, smiling as she relaxed back against her pillow. she reached her hand over to feel Ava’s side of the bed. “Will you let Ava know that I’m safely on the ship?”

“Yes Captain Lance, and I will tell her to give you some space as well.”

“Thanks Gideon.”

“You’re welcome, Captain.” 

With Gideon’s help, Sara was able to research more about Orientation and Mobility training through the school. She felt hopeful as Gideon told her more about it and eventually she heard a knock at the door as Ava’s hand rapped against the hard ore.

“Sara, can I come in?” Ava’s voice calmly and hesitantly asked through the metal door.

Sara told Gideon to let Ava in and she could hear the door sliding open and Ava’s footsteps on the floor as she walked over. Sara fiddled with the fabric of the sheets as she felt the bed dip and Ava sat down next to her hip.

“I wanted to apologize for earlier. You were right, you can take care of yourself and I shouldn’t have put the tracker on you. I’m sorry Sara.”

“Thank you,” Sara said, reaching out to her. Ava captured her hand and gave it a squeeze. “But I was wrong to run off like that. It was stupid and you were right, I could have gotten hurt. I did get hurt.”

Ava sucked in a breath and Sara could tell that she was trying not to freak out and calmly asked. “Are you alright?”

“I scraped my knees, and I nearly broke my ankle, but I’m fine now. Gideon fixed me up and everything, but it made me realize that I can’t just blindly walk around alleyways.”

Ava sighed and leaned in, pulling her in for a hug and just holding her for a moment. “I’m sorry Sara, I know how much of an adjustment this is and how hard this is for you.”

“I’m blind now,” Sara said, it was the first time she had let the reality be spoken between them. 

“Yeah,” Ava said as Sara felt her nod against her shoulder. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t go where you want to anymore. We can make it so that you can at least walk around the Waverider. Then you can learn to walk with a guide dog or a cane or something, I’m not exactly sure what you need, but we can get it.”

“Gideon said that there’s a blind school in Star City that offers O&M training and they can teach me how to walk with a cane.”

“That sounds great,” Ava said, pulling back. “How soon can you start?”

“I’m not sure,” Sara said with a shrug. “Gideon’s going to set up a meeting, maybe we can do that tomorrow.”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Ava said, reaching up and cupping her cheek. “Is there anything else you want to do tonight? Most of the Legends are still at the concert, but Mick and Lita are back because it’s a school night.”

“I think I’m ready to go to bed,” Sara said, pulling Ava down until she laid next to her.

“Sara, I’ve still got this punk rock outfit on,” Ava complained as Sara wrapped her arms around her and held on tight.

“Just till I fall asleep?”

“Okay,” Ava said, leaning in to kiss her forehead. 

“Goodnight baby,” Sara said, smiling as she leaned over to kiss Ava. 

“Goodnight, my love.”

[deathbymeow]

Left Unanswered

Ladybug landed on Chloe’s balcony some 48 hours after she managed to open the first letter. It was an emotional goodbye, written the night before he left. With shaking hands, it had taken her an hour to finally open it and after seeing his delicate handwriting for the first time in years another to finally read it.

Dear Marinette,

There are no words to explain how sorry I am. I am a mere coward and do not deserve your forgiveness nor do I ask for it. If I could give my life for his I would without any hesitation.

I’m leaving Paris. My father has chosen to send me to New York to study abroad and live with my aunt. I should stand up to him and demand I stay but I fear if I do, I will only make things harder for you.

That’s what I’ve told myself but deep down I know if I stayed, we would never be the same and I don’t know how to live with that.

I broke us before we really ever had a chance.

I want you to know I may have loved the girl in the mask first, but I fell even harder for the one behind it. The last few years I’ve struggled with my growing feelings for you. I didn’t want to complicate your life with my burden. It turned out my burden was already yours.  

I wish it didn’t take losing what we did to realise what was always in front of me. I’ve wasted so many years and now we may never get our chance. I don’t want you to wait for me. I don’t know if or when I’ll be back.

I will forever love you Marinette and my heart will always belong to you and you alone.

Always yours,

Adrien

She read it over and over until she could no longer see through her tears. Her heart ached and she struggled to regain control before she managed to pull it together and read the rest. All 1128 of them. He’d written something every day he was gone. Some letters were just a paragraph or two, a summary of his day. They all ended the same with him telling her just how much he missed her and still loved her.

About a year in, the letters started to change. Adrien wanted to come home, but he didn’t know how. He was scared that she didn’t want to see him. It was almost as if he was waiting for her permission. It broke her even more to think that he’d been waiting all this time for her to answer.

Ladybug took a deep breath and walked into Chloe’s apartment. She knew her way around the spacious layout even with the lights off. It had become her home away from home. It was ironic really. If you had told her that five years ago, she would have fallen over laughing. Zoe had been a huge influence in Chloe’s life and when she’d left to pursue her acting career Ladybug decided to give Queen Bee another chance. Now there was no denying it, Chloe had become one of her best friends. Her home had become a safe haven from all the memories at the bakery that threatened to pull her back down the dark hole of depression.

“Chloe, are you home?” Ladybug called scanning the room. The only light came from a few candles on the coffee table.

“For fuck sakes LB, people have front doors for a reason.” Chloe’s head popped up from the couch. Her hair was a mess and that’s when Ladybug noticed the clothes scattered around the couch. Sabrina’s head popped up next to Chloe’s and she shyly waved.

“Oh, umm yeah sorry. I umm. Sabrina always good to see you. When did you get back into town? Anyway I’ll… sorry.” Ladybug took a few steps back, but Chloe had already grabbed her robe and gotten off the couch.

“No, don’t you dare. You’ve already interrupted, now move it.” Chloe demanded pointing to her bedroom. “Sorry babe, just give us a minute.” She kissed her girlfriend on the lips then gently shoved Ladybug towards her bedroom.

Chloe closed the door and took Ladybugs hands in hers. “Okay before you say anything Luka called me.”

“Chloe I…”

“No look LB I know you two are… well I don’t exactly know what you are. Anyway, he didn’t go into details, but he told me he fucked up royally and that you would probably end up here, so spill. What’s going on?” Chloe asked as she sat on her oversized bed and pulled Ladybug down next to her.

“Fuck. Chloe, I didn’t know. All this time. Oh my god three years. I…” Tears she didn’t know she had left spilled down her cheeks as she started to sob. She hated losing self-control like this but at this point she’d given up on trying to control the emotions she’d hidden for the last three years. It was as if a flood gate had opened and there was no stopping it now.

Chloe didn’t hesitate. She grabbed onto her friend’s shoulders and pulled her into a tight hug. “Okay sweets, you need to breath and then explain what you’re talking about.”

“Letters… Luka… didn’t… give… me… only… two days… ago.” Was all she could choke out.

“You have to be shitting me. How many didn’t you see?” Chloe’s voice was laced with venom that Ladybug knew wasn’t directed at her.

“All… of them.”

Chloe softly lifted Ladybug off her so she could look into her eyes. “You’re telling me you didn’t read any of them until now?”

Finally, Ladybug managed to slow her breathing enough to talk without feeling like she was choking on the words trying to leave her mouth. “Luka said I’d told him I never wanted to talk to Adrien again, so he didn’t give then to me. He said he was waiting for the right time.”

“What the actual fuck. Like he wasn’t benefiting from it.” Chloe looked like she wanted to tear him to shreds.

“In no way am I blaming you, but why didn’t you ask me about them? Why didn’t you tell me to reply? Why didn’t you give them to me?” Ladybug couldn’t look at Chloe anymore. She knew what she was asking the blonde and she knew no matter how she worded it, it would come across as an accusation.

“Oh sweets, I did a few times. You always changed the subject as soon as you heard his name. I didn’t want to be that person. You had enough of them always hounding you about things. I know that’s why you come here, to escape it all. Anyway, Luka was around you the most and I trusted him to give them to you on your good days not three fucken years later.” She pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Why did Adrien think running away was the only answer, Chloe? I needed him and he wasn’t there. He didn’t even talk to me before he left.” Ladybug stood up and walked over to the window and looked out at the Eiffel Tower.

“You knew Adrien, but you didn’t know the full extent of his home life. His father is nothing but a monster in designer clothes. Gabriel Agreste mentally tortured that boy. He starved Adrien of love and made him feel so inadequate in everything he did no wonder Adrien blamed himself for every bad thing that ever happened.” Chloe grabbed a piece of paper and a pen off her bedside table and wrote something down. “He tries to hide it but he’s hurting. He’s always been quick to make rash decisions thinking he’s doing the right thing but in reality, half the time he’s just running away.”

Ladybug felt every one of her words slice through her. She looked at her own reflection in disgust. What had she become? Why had she been so quick to doubt him?  

She hadn’t noticed Chloe come up behind her until she put her hand on her shoulder.

“He still loves you. I never believed in that type of love until I saw the way he looks at you. The way his eyes light up when he talks about you even though it clearly hurts him. The way your wounds never healed even with every one’s love. It isn’t our love that you need. You need him as much as he needs you, Marinette.” Chloe passed her the piece of paper. “For when you’re ready. Don’t leave it another three years.”

Ladybug eyed the piece of paper before taking it and tucking it into her suit. “Thank you.” She kissed the blonde’s cheek then slipped out the door and disappeared into the night.  

******

Ladybug sat at the top of the Eifel Tower looking at Adrien’s address until the streets below were empty. And then before she knew what had happened, she was standing on his balcony trying to remember how to breath.

Tired and emotionally drained, her thoughts were a jumbled mess. Was this the right time? Could she really forgive him that easily? Could she forgive herself for that matter? He was probably asleep. This was a stupid idea, what was she thinking. She should just go. What would she say anyway?

As she turned to leave the door opened and a hand softly took hers. Her head lowered and a small sob escaped her lips. His hand felt warm against her gloved fingers. What was she doing? Panic started to grip her senses and she took a step towards the edge. A gentle tug on her hand made her turn around and she inhales as the light reflected off his emerald eyes.

Adrien looked broken. It was clear he hadn’t slept in days. His lip was split and bruised from the fight with Luka a few nights earlier and his hair was a mess making him look more Chat like. Ladybug couldn’t help but notice his bare chest and the way his pyjama pants sat low on his toned hips. A blush spread over her cheeks, and she quickly looked away.

“We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to but please don’t go.” He begged gently squeezing her hand.

Ladybug gazed back into his eyes, they seemed to melt into her soul and pull her towards him. She found herself nodding as she let him guide her into his apartment. He let go of her hand to close the door and curtains behind them. Ladybug looked around his dark apartment, Plagg was floating over the kitchen bench, and he gave her a little salute.

“Tikki spots off.” Pink light washed over them and the little Kwami smiled at Marinette before floating over to Plagg and giving him a big hug.  

Adrien hadn’t taken his eyes off her and it wasn’t until she felt the cool night air against her legs that she remembered she was only in an oversized t-shirt and fluffy bed socks.  

“Hey.” He looked almost shy as he smiled down at her. “Can I get you a drink or anything?” he asked as he rubbed the back of his neck.

Marinette shook her head unable to find the words she wanted to say. A moment passed, neither of them talked as they staired into each other’s eyes. She couldn’t help but notice the tension in Adrien’s shoulders, as if he was afraid, if he moved she would run again.

She hated how the distance between them felt like it was miles instead of a few feet. Before she could analyse the situation anymore, she closed the gap and threw her arms around him. Adrien exhaled like he’d been holding his breath then wrapped his arms around her and snuggled his face into her neck.

The two stood in each other’s arms for what could have been a minute or an hour. Time seemed irrelevant at this point. Marinette felt her eyes getting heavy but the thought of leaving physically hurt. So, she did the only logical thing she could think of.

She let go of his chest and took his hand. His eyes never left hers as she walked over to the couch and flopped down, pulling him down next to her.

“Just need to sleep.” Marinette whispered while looking up at him through her long lashes.

Adrien nodded in agreement, he stood up and grabbed the throw blanket from the back of the couch as Marinette curled up on her side. He gently placed it over her and turned to leave but her small hand grabbed his.

“Please don’t go.” Marinette asked as she lifted the blanket for him to climb under.

“As you wish, princess.” He said as he lay down next to her and wrapped her in his arms.

Marinette’s body relaxed against his as if it knew something she didn’t. Even though all her pain, she felt like a part of her had returned. It felt like coming home.

Listening to his heartbeat and surrounded by his warmth it wasn’t long before she fell into a dreamless sleep for the first time in what felt like forever.