#everyone say ‘thank you laila!’

[marlenesluv]

LAILA BLESSED US WITH THIS MICK PIC-

[uluvjay]

Guys my age- L.Hamilton

Lewis Hamilton x fem Schumacher! Reader

In which your boyfriend can’t seem to satisfy you the way you need, landing you in the hands of someone much more experienced

Warnings?; SMUT; Age gap!(reader is 25), reader is also Charles girlfriend!, physical cheating, mentions of cheating, unprotected sex(wrap it before u tap it!), p in v, fingering(f receiving), nipple play.

Not really sure how I feel about this but I hope you enjoy!

Your hadn’t intended for Lewis to overhear the conversation with your brother’s girlfriend, it was quit embarrassing to have someone catch you talking about the fact that your boyfriend hadn’t gotten you off in months but here you were.

Laila had noticed the tension in your shoulders as of Late and the way you always seemed to be frustrated, but she didn’t want to overstep.

That was until she saw your frustrated frame exiting the Ferrari motorhome and stomping into the Mercedes hospitality. Quietly following you she found you sat in a far corner with a bottle of water and pout on your lips.

“Are you okay?” She questioned sitting next to you.

With a huff you thought about lying but you couldn’t take this anymore, Charles hadn’t been satisfying you in the slightest and you hadn’t shared your building frustrations with anyone.

“Me and Charles are having some…issues” you shrugged.

“Oh? Are you guys arguing?” She kindly asked.

“Uh no…I-it’s more you know, sex related” you whispered.

“Oh!” She blushed with a small smile.

“I’m sorry Laila, you definitely don’t wanna hear about my issues regarding my sex life” you blushed as well.

“No, it’s okay! I’m assuming you haven’t talked to anyone about it and I can tell somethings been bothering you, so spill. I’m all ears” she smiled, moving her chair closer to yours.

However what you had managed to miss in your small annoyance filled haze was the Brit sat at the table behind yours.

Lewis had been quietly enjoying his lunch when he watched you storm inside, face red and eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. He watched you purchase the bottle of water and slump down in a chair at the table in front of him.

He was never one to eavesdrop but hearing your say that Charles wasn’t satisfying you in the way you needed caught his attention and for some reason he couldn’t turn his attention away.

You were a good bit younger then the him, and maybe he’d read the signals wrong but there was always tension between the two of you since Mick had joined Mercedes.

Between your sweet hugs and lingering touches every time you passed by him, you had him going crazy. It didn’t help that He always found himself locked in conversations with you when you would hang around the garage.

You loved hearing about the car and all the new adventures he and Roscoe had been on while he was home, and he enjoyed hearing you talk about university and how your Major was going.

You’d also be lying if you said the way his hand lingered on your lower back after a hug didn’t make you feel butterflies in your stomach, or that you didn’t find yourself watching his ink covered hands more often then not.

There was no lie that Lewis was a beautiful man, everyone knew it. And yes you’d caught yourself staring at the man a lot but you loved Charles, and you’d never betray him like that. Well that’s what you told yourself until the older man had you pinned against the door of his drivers room.

-

“Lewis!” You called turning down the hallway you’d seen him disappear down.

The man turned at the sound of you calling his name, a smile over taking his face as he watched you open your arms to embrace him.

“I wanted to tell you congratulations, I didn’t catch you outside” You spoke into his shoulder as your hands went around his neck, and his took place around your waist.

“Thank you darling” he replied placing a kind kiss to the side of your head.

“Of course! You did amazing, and it was wrong of the team to leave you hanging out there” you whispered to the taller man, not wanting anyone from the team to hear.

“Ehh, not to upset about it. Just happy I was able to secure a podium” he smiled looking down at you.

You two held eye contact for a moment, hands still lingering on each others bodies with no intention of moving them.

“I..uh” you stuttered as you finally moved your eyes to ground at the feeling of a blush began to scatter your cheeks and you felt the deep throb in your core.

“You should what sweetheart?” He teased

“I uh should head back to Ferrari, think Charles and Carlos wanted to go out to celebrate the win.” You shyly spoke attempting to take a step back but his hold on your waist stayed.

“Ahh, Charles right.” He nodded before patting your hip and pulling his hand away, taking a step back.

“Have fun darling, hopefully you’ll be able to Cum tonight” he smirked as your distancing frame turned back around so quick he was scared you’d fall.

“What?” You spoke, mouth drying instantly.

“Weren’t very quite In hospitality today love, heard ever bit of your rant to Laila. Heard how no matter what he does he just can’t seem to make you finish, such a shame really. A woman like you deserves to be having so many orgasms that you have to beg for him to stop” he teased with a faux pout on his lips.

“Lewis-I, you weren’t supposed to hear that” you whispered yelled at the man as you walked closer to him.

“Oops” he shrugged before turning and making way into his drivers room, a smirk forming on his face as he heard your light footsteps following.

It was like your feet were moving on their own accord, quickly following behind him and shutting his drivers room door as you entered.

You kept yourself pinned against the door as he sat his helmet down on a table and began to remove his fireproofs. A breath got caught in your throat at the sight of him pulling off his undershirt, revealing his ink covered back.

“Why don’t you take a picture darling?” He teased as he turned back to face you.

“I-” you tried speaking out a snappy reply but the feeling of his body growing closer and closer to yours had you shutting up.

“You what?” He asked quietly as his hands found a home on your waist again.

“Nothing” you quipped, mind already blanking due to the warmth his hands were providing on your body.

He reached a hand up to cup your face, smiling when you leaned into it.

“Tell me, what’re we going to do here Y/n? You want me to fuck you? Take care of you the way a woman deserves to be taken care of? Or are you going to go back to you boyfriend and pretend this never happened?” He lightly questioned.

You thought about it for a moment, you really did. You loved Charles but it was no lie that over the past few months things had been different, you two didn’t touch each other the same and when you did he couldn’t even get you to the end. And it wasn’t really betrayal if he had already been meeting up with that art major from Paris, so you said fuck it.

“I want you to fuck me lewis, give me what I deserve” you whispered in his ear.

One sentence was all it took for his inked hand to slip from your cheek down to your throat and his lips to slam against yours. The kiss was quick and messy, full of clashing teeth and tongue’s fighting for dominance but you loved every second of it.

Your hands found his braids, lightly tugging causing a groan to escape the man’s throat. Your own sounds starting to escape from your throat as his lips began their descent down your neck.

He smirked against you skin when he heard your small whine as his teeth nipped at the spot below your ear.

“Lew, no marks please” you whimpered out.

“Mhm” he grumbled before his lip’s reattached to yours and his hands slipped down your thighs before tapping the back of them, signaling for you to jump.

A gasp of surprise left your lips when his hands gripped your ass under your sundress rather then your thighs. He kept his hold on you as we walked the two of you to the small couch he had in his room, laying you down against the leather as he hovered over you.

“So pretty baby” he praised, his eyes ranking over your flushed body. Your dress had ridden up exposing the pretty white lace you were wearing under your dress. A groan escaped Lewis’s throat at the sight of the delicate material, running a finger under the band he snapped it against your skin, earning a whine from you.

He rolled your dress up the rest of the way allowing him to see the wet spot that had formed on your panties.

“So wet for me, huh baby?” He teased with a smirk as he slowly moved the lace to the side, growling at the sight of your dripping folds.

“All for you sir” you shot back as your own smirk took over your face at his warning look.

“Little bit of a brat aren’t you baby?” He spoke reaching over to pinch your thigh.

You nodded in reply, pulling your lower lip between your teeth as he began to trail his fingers where you needed them most.

“Oh! You gasped as he ran one through your folds, his touch was new and unfamiliar and you could feel your body craving for more of it.

He worked you slowly, starting with small rubs to your clit before journeying a finger down to your entrance and slipping inside. He could watch the sight of your thrown back head all day everyday.

“Lewis” you whimpered his name as his finger began speeding up, “please add another” added in a light plea for the man to give you just a bit more.

Giving you what you asked he slipped another finger inside and began scissoring said fingers at a fast pace, loving the way you threw your eyes were rolling for him.

He continued to work you for a while, fingers moving at an unforgiving pace as his thumb came and went against your clit and his mouth spilled dirty words at you, all helping to push you closer and closer to the edge you hadn’t been at in months.

“Fuck! I’m gonna come Lewis, please let me cum” you begged the older man, opening your eyes to meet his dark ones.

“Go ahead baby, come for me” he gave permission.

Your body shook at the feeling of your orgasm washing over you for the first time in what felt like ages. A mix of German and English spilled from your mouth as Lewis continued to work you through your high, not stopping until you we’re attempting to push his hand away.

A whine escaped your mouth as you watched him slip his glistening fingers into his mouth, a low groan escaping him at the taste.

“Taste so good princess” he smiled

You pulled him down into another kiss, a whimper escaping you at the taste of yourself on his tongue. You hands reached down to push down his underwear and finally free his aching cock.

You pulled away from his mouth just in time to watch his length bounce against his lower stomach, a moan breaking free at the sight.

“Want you to fuck me lewis, please” you once again begged the older man.

“Whatever you want pretty girl” he spoke as he stroked himself a few times before running his tip through your folds.

He felt so heavy and warm against you, he was about the same length as Charles just thicker, and you couldn’t wait to feel all of him inside you.

Your fingers dug crescent marks into his back as he slipped inside, his face was buried in your neck allowing you to hear the small whimper that escaped his throat at the feeling of you welcoming him inside.

“Fuck you’re so tight” he groaned, stilling for a moment attempting to give you both a moment to get used to one another.

“You can move now” you breathlessly spoke.

With a small nod you felt him begin to move, he started slowly but after a moment he set a steady pace that had your eyes rolling back.

He felt so fucking good, you could feel every single ridge and vein on his cock, the way he filled you up had you barley able to breathe.

Lewis wasn’t doing much better, the vice grip you had around him had him ready to cum in seconds and he truly wasn’t sure how long he’d be able to last.

“Feel so full Lewis” you cried to the man, locking you ankles around his waist.

“I know baby, doing so good for me” he praised you, his hand finding the hem of your dress, pulling it down to allow your breast to be free.

You whined at the felling of his teeth lightly grazing one of your nipples while a hand worked on the other, pulling and pinching the hardened bud.

One of your hands slipping around the back of his neck to keep him there, while the other ran down his back leaving deep scratches in its wake.

“I’m getting close” you whimpered out as the feeling of stomach got hotter and hotter by the second.

“Me to baby” he replied as he leaned back and moved your legs from his waist to his rest over his shoulders.

The moan that escaped your mouth due to the new position was downright pornographic and had a small giggle coming from the man above you.

“H-holy shit” you moaned, it was all beginning to be to much, the building pressure in your stomach and the way his cock didn’t seem to miss that spot inside of you, reaching a hand out in attempt to push him only resulted in your hand being smacked away.

“Gonna come? I can feel how tight your clenching around me, come on pretty girl” he encouraged as one of his hands slipped down to rub the bud between your legs.

“Lewis!” You all about screamed at the added sensation.

“Ooh, I’m cumming! I’m cumming Lewis” you cried as the dam inside you finally broke and you came all over him, coating his cock in your wetness.

“Oh god” he groaned, the way you were clenching around him and the sharp whines leaving your lips were egging him on.

“Come on Lewis, come for me” you encouraged in his ear, lips working around his neck.

“Fuck, where do you want me to come baby?” He questioned knowing he was seconds away from coming.

“Inside lew, please cum inside of me” you begged him.

And he did just that, face buried in your neck as your hands ranked down his back and he shook above you. Pretty moans and little “oh fucks” escaping from his throat and right into your ear.

He just about dropped right on top of you after he finished coming, placing little kisses where his mouth could reach while you ran a hand up and down his back and placed your own kisses to his head.

You were about to speak up before the sound of knocking and your brother’s girlfriends voice came through the door.

“Uh Lewis, is Y/n in there? We can’t find her”

-

[pierregazly]

to live for the hope of it all (part 3) ꨄ charles leclerc smau

charles leclerc x fem!reader / mick schumacher x fem!reader

pic credits: pinterest

link to part 1 | link to part 2

charles wins big (in 2 ways), mick soft launches, and y/n's just there to have a good time. thank you for all the love on this series! someone made a suggestion of having an alt au for the driver y/n didn't end up with so if there's interest in that let me know!! also this is NOT an accurate representation of monza 2023

yourusername

liked by pierregasly, arthur_leclerc, mickschumacher, and 959,052 others

yourusername no one show this to my boss lol... but monza you were the most wonderful experience... as always. congratulations to everyone, but a special congratulations to someone who means the most to me even when things are hard.

view all 7,888 comments

username mother are u gonna get fired over this

username mother we like u too much at mercedes for this pls delete

arthur_leclerc forza ferrari!!!

username no charles like or comment??? this man better know how to fight

username relax he's probably celebrating jeez

yourusername has followed charles_leclerc

mickschumacher has posted a story

liked by yourusername, username, username and others

replies

username omg y/n??? username mick with the soft launch omf yourusername 2 lucky girls (and then there's mick) in this soft launch

charles_leclerc has followed yourusername

charles_leclerc

liked by carlossainz55, pierregasly, yourusername and 2,546,116 others

charles_leclerc could not have done this without the team, the tifosi faithful and the extraordinary people who are always by my side. this one is for you 🇮🇹

view all 10,983 comments

pierregasly congrats mr leclerc 😉 hope you got your prize

username forza ferrari!!!

yourusername so proud of you always 💗

username y/n commenting on his last post is the obvious reason why he won lets be real rn

username war is over... y/n and charles follow each other again and she's regularly commenting

yourusername has posted a story

liked by charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc, mickschumacher, and others

replies

username shut up is that CHARLES is this a soft soft soft launch charles_leclerc 💗

mickschumacher

liked by yourusername, lance_stroll, username, and 202,406 others

mickschumacher my personal photographer has really outdone herself these past 2 weeks

view all 2,340 comments

yourusername lets all say thank you y/n (for the photos and for encouraging laila that the backstreet boys look was a vibe)

mickschumacher i knew it

username omg username on twitter was acc right???

username we were all delulu for weeks, i cant believe y/n and mick are just friends 😭

username thank u yourusername for taking the best photos of our boy!!

liked by yourusername and 200 others

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, mickschumacher, pierregasly and 687,843 others

yourusername mama always said if a man tells you he loves you, make him prove it. i think he's proving it mama.

view all 4,326 comments

pierregasly red roses seems more logical but i guess this works

yourusername shut up pierre they're lovely

username are they from CHARLES

arthur_leclerc daisies for the prettiest flower in the room

yourusername you texted me 45 seconds after posting this and told me they were 'the ugliest fucking flowers you've ever seen and you're not surprised he'd pick them' arthur_leclerc i stand by what i said here and there

charles_leclerc 🤍

taglist

@leclerces @needtokeepfeelingsincheck @sassyheroneckgiant @sillyfreakfanparty @leclercdream @allywthsr @bladestark @adoxra @electrobutterfly @powerfulmess @katcontrreras @livster @vellicora @meadhbhcavanagh @tsukishitm-a @f1pandrea @incoherenciass @sltwins @sunny44 @myescapefromthislife @janeholt3 @hwienv @raizelchrysanderoctavius @msliz @karina-v20 @crlsummer @gaslysainz @p4st3lst4rs @lazybot @tagteamedbitch @ravisinghs-wife @thomaslefteyebrow @smoothopz @willowpains @justdreamersdream @elijahslover @pampeop @driveswiftly13 @leclercdream @glow-ish @hheartbreakhotell @notleclerc @f1wintermoon13 @ironmaiden1313 @peachiicherries @christianpulisic10 @elowynnlane @needtokeepfeelingsincheck @treehillheda @stevesworld9 @laneyspaulding19 @nmw-am @iloveyou3000morgan

if your name is bolded/struct through, i wasn't able to tag you for some reason. thank you all for the love!

[nouvellevqgue]

✦ LIKE AN UNKNOWN SIGN, C. LECLERC

sometimes, hidden love without sign is just unknown

req: Maybe a smau for Charles Leclerc x Reader but he’s with Alexandra and everyone wants them to like get tgt and she like posts stuff that’s like telling him to break up with her and at the end he breaks up with Alex and they end up tgt

fc: olivia rodrigo

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yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, lailahasanovic, and 520,143 others

yourusername 🥦🌱⛳🍵☘️

👤: nbcsnl

view comments...

username damn green looks good on you

astonmartinf1 😌☘️

username oh no aston martin commented, does this mean...

⤷ username nah don't

username your performance was good omg wish i was there😭😭

tatemcrae wish you were here

tatemcrae miss you real bad

⤷ yourusername miss you too baby<3☹️☹️

username okay laila i can tell, but charles i don't know

⤷ username laila and mick are her friends, she definitely know charles and vice versa 🤷🏼‍♀️

⤷ username but still bcs it's quite sus

lailahasanovic that fur coat is top tier i want it

⤷ yourusername same honestly😭

username poor alex she deserves better☹️

username he should've be with her fr i mean HIS INTERVIEW???

⤷ username he's a fan alright, and so do we

⤷ username DON'T U UNDERSTAND HIS FEELINGS FOR HER IS NOT JUST A FAN THEIR WITH IDOL SORT OF RELATIONSHIP

⤷ username y/n belong to charles. period

username i'm hoping that she's aware with these comments and ended up making a crazy songs about alex and building a tons of gossips around the paddock. it's gonna be so much fun oml

louispartridge grinch

⤷ yourusername elf

scuderiaferrari 🥴❤️

⤷ username ok fuck now ferrari commented i know it's complicated

yourusername added to their story!

caption: he ain't wrong, this kinda looks like a grinch. thanks louispartridge for the reminder.

replying to: yourusername 's story

still with louis?

replying to: charles_leclerc

you know there's nothing between us

and how about you and alex? are you still with her or something?

seen

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yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc and 781,290 others

yourusername i only speak truth 🗣️

view comments...

bradmondo slaying natural look as usual

⤷ username i thought it was brad pitt for a sec💀💀

username new album when?

username new song when

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username mother slayed as always

florencepugh i miss our kitchen fight😔

⤷ yourusername sameeee😭😭

louispartridge you forgot your sunny

⤷ yourusername i already edit it on photoshop

⤷ username omg louisy/n interaction is real😍

⤷ username IT'S JUST A SINGLE (1) INTERACTION AND YOU SAID THEY'RE TOGETHER????

⤷ username say that to yourself shipping y/n and charles

⤷ username you see how charles is here now huh

⤷ username what she just a random selebgram

⤷ username WDYM RANDOM SELEBGRAM??????????

lancestroll hey come get your man he won't answer my call after last night

⤷ username what last night

⤷ carlossainz55 lancestroll you know she has a private account right?

⤷ landonorris nothing happened last night, everyone goodbye

⤷ username that's not a proper goodbye and you know it lando

⤷ username something happened and twitter are still cold...

⤷ yourusername 😐

⤷ landonorris how about we set up a barbeque party?

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yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, carmenmmundt and 470,511 others

yourusername babysitter for hire

view comments...

username i know but we need a break up song rn

username tell me she's in love and hiding it (she's bad at hiding her feelings)

liked by charles_leclerc

username but tbh i don't believe if her album is about love. and if it is, some songs are definitely about her prev break up

username can y'all just enjoy her content?

username petition for taylorswift to invite her to be in eras tour

isahernaez mi linda hermanita😍🥰

sabrinacarpenter can't believe you bought the american girl

⤷ yourusername should've bought the british girl then

⤷ sabrinacarpenter monaco girl

comment has been deleted

⤷ username what the fuck i'm heading to twitter rn

username what is this sabrina and y/n???????? having a conv without starting a war??

username SABRINA AND Y/N NATION WHAT ARE WE FEELING NOW?

irisapatow the bff cupcake is true but there's no me, so i claim it as a false

⤷ yourusername no u no probs 😎

⤷ irisapatow 🖕🏻

username after she release sour, i think it's time to do sweet yourusername?

⤷ yourusername i'll do bitter instead.

username charles with alex, there ain't no way

⤷ rachelzegler please take the truth

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yourusername and vogue

vogue aspiring singer y/n l/n is sharing her thoughts about her newest single, ‘all-american bitch’ and about her rumoured love triangle between the formula one driver, charles leclerc, and enola holmes actor, louis partridge.

view comments...

iamrebeccad pretty baby 🤩

⤷ username now rebecca's here, is this not enough for yall to think that charles is with her rn

⤷ username c'mon that is innocent, she just supporting her💀

username YESSSSS VOGUE NOTICED‼️‼️🗣️🔥

username mother is back photoshooting y'all

username charles break up with alex challenge

username pls just be with charles

username wdym she's great with louis

username MY LIFE HAS BEEN RESTORED

username Y/N AND CHARLES Y/N AND CHARLES Y/N AND CHARLES Y/N AND CHARLES Y/N AND CHARLES

username she's literally so stunning omg

charlottesiine 👑

⤷ yourusername no u 👸🏻

⤷ username mothers interacting

⤷ username green light from cha everybody

⤷ username she literally said like, "just get him girl"

sabrinacarpenter added to their story!

caption: what a (real) american bitch should look like:

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charles_leclerc and meta

liked by charles_leclerc, zuck, and 148,790 others

meta charles_leclerc and our camera glasses is going out karting in los angeles🥳🏁

view comments...

username literally 🤓

username akshually ☝️🤓

username he is not maxplaining so relax

carlossainz55 you see the early comments? AJAJAJAJAJAJA

⤷ charles_leclerc i tried my best and you just be like this? what is this kind of teammate

yourusername hello you standard office worker

meta pretty nerdy✨

username NOT YN SAYING HE LOOK NERDY TOO😭😭

username but he looks so good in it tho

username y/n 🤝 carlos = saying he looks nerdy without saying he looks like it

username girl wym is that🫵🏻😭

username who's p1?

⤷ landonorris a W meta worker

⤷ charles_leclerc lie

⤷ landonorris no no don't try, because i'm there too

⤷ yourusername beaten by a morker

⤷ charles_leclerc it's not him, and what is a morker

⤷ yourusername meta worker🤓

f1wagsupdate

f1wagsupdate charles rumoured (second) girlfriend, y/n, is seen leaving a local cafe in los angeles yesterday with a mysterious man with a tan hoodie and a sunglasses. sources said that she is keeping her relationship strict with privacy.

view comments...

username she's off with louis and now she's with another man?? why is she so childish?

username how old is she why is she looks so damn short?

username bet it's louis they're reconciling

⤷ username keep dreaming girly i'll wake u up

username nonono it's charles i know

username GOD WHY IS IT ALWAYS THEM BOTH PLS GUESS FOR ANOTHER

username for the love of god she hasn't breaking up with louis yet pls stop

username god forbid her to have a male friend

username they WERE friend PLEASEEEE😭😭

username literally manifesting that it'll be charles

username but if it's charles, what abt louis? will he get his own sad album?

⤷ username i think it's charles who will get the song/album

username get over it guys she's literally a child

username she's mature enough to stay with one especially when it's THE louis partridge

username idc with the rumours but she looks good with her fits

⤷ yncloset slayed as always

username no but shush do you realize charles' partnership with meta is also in la

⤷ username SHUT UP DON'T MAKE ME THINK ABT IT🫵🏼😭😭😭

⤷ username wait yeah but idc i don't want to trace the line

joris__trouche added to their story!

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yourusername is added to their story!

caption: what the fucks happening

[star-girl69]

hi everyone! this is so lazy but pls enjoy 🫶🫶

warnings: swearing and also slight freaky stuff 😣

you: good morning my sweet girlfriend

kk: wtf

kk: why r u not in my bed??

you: babe… i told u i had to leave early this morning bc i had an appt

kk: for what?

you: getting my nails done

kk: u abandoned me to get ur nails done?

you: yes…?

you: i don’t think i appreciate this attitude maybe i’ll just go back to my dorm

kk: please come back to my place.

you: say pretty please with sprinkles on top

kk: y/n

you: ok see u tmrw then

kk: pretty please with sprinkles on top.

you: ofc i will come back to urs 🥰

kk: 🙄

you: attitude????

kk: no ily

you: aww i love u too!

—-

you: can u plz drive me to my friend’s birthday dinner on friday and pick me up

kk: what times

you: drop me off at 6 pick me up at 9

kk: ok no problem

you: thank u ily

you: i would carpool w my friend serena but i don’t trust her in a car

you: she runs red lights a lot lol

kk: ??? plz don’t ever get into a car with her. i will drive u always

you: aww ur so sweet! not wanting me to die 🥰

kk: anything for my passenger princess

—-

you: CAROLINE ROSE HARVEY

kk: im sorry

kk: i’m so sorry

kk: i’ll make it up to you i promise im so sorry

…

laila: what did you do to kk 😭😭

laila: she’s staring at her phone in horror and when i asked her what was wrong she just said y/n before putting her head in her hands

you: i’m letting her sit in fear for a minute

laila: i admire you a lot ❤️

…

you: so i wake up this morning

kk: yes and u looked so pretty when i left

you: thank u

you: anyways and i then go about my day and i’m ready to run out and do my errands i look at myself in the mirror

kk: and u saw how beautiful u r?

you: yes and also i saw a GAINT FUCKING HICKEY ON MY NECK

you: SEVERAL OF THEM ACTUALLY

kk: do u really want me to say sorry for that

you: yes??? i need so much makeup to cover this up. actually i think u should buy new concealer for me

kk: as long as i can do it again

you: no this is so embarrassing

kk: it’s ok you’ll be saying different later

kk: besides u were encouraging me last night

you: ur delusional i’ve never done that

kk: if u say so babe but we both know

you: *link to new concealer*

kk: just bought 2 prepare to use them up

you: no

kk: yessss

you: no

kk: 😉

you: die

kk: ❤️

—-

you: i’m really craving chick fil a

kk: ok

you: i’m REALLY craving chick fil a

kk: u mentioned that

you: bye u don’t care abt me

you: gonna go text my other hoes

kk: u don’t have other hoes

you: im about to

kk: we’ll see

you: PLEASE GET ME CHICK FIL A

you: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

kk: thought u were texting other hoes?

you: i lied ur my only hoe and ilysm

you: plz get me chick fil a

you: i’ll do a cartwheel on it

kk: ???

kk: babe i’ll get u chick fil a

kk: thanks tho? i think

you: YAYYYY

—-

kk: i know ur asleep right now and i know u r very tired and i’m sorry but i forgot my helmet can u pls bring it to me at the rink

you: how did u forget ur helmet

you: like it weighs 10 pounds and it’s huge

kk: mean

kk: and idk i’m stupid plz bring it

you: ugh fine i’m On my way!

you: omw.

you: im not excited

kk: i love u so much u r the light of my life i cannot imagine waking up without ur beautiful face next to me u are brighter than the sun and i love u

you: thank u shakespeare ur so romantic

you: can we go shopping tmrw and u pay i need new pants

kk: u don’t need pants

you: it’s 9am

kk: yes we can go shopping tmrw

you: love u!

kk: ❤️

—-

you: hi

you: are u doing anything tn?? i feel like we haven’t seen each other in forever

kk: i know baby i miss u

kk: i have practice until 8 but u can come over still after? sleepover?

you: yes definitely i’ll be there

kk: i cant wait to see u pretty girl

—-

you: omg this restaurant looks so good we should go

kk: sunday at 6?

you: um yes i’m free

kk: just made a reservation

you: damn 😭 i’m impressed

kk: whatever my girl wants she gets 🤷‍♀️

—-

you: hi baby

…

you: so what position u got her in rn?

you: missionary? cowgirl?

kk: why do i love u

you: blocked

kk: i have no girls in no positions except for u

you: why are u so busy then?

kk: picked up this new hobby called hockey idk if it will go anywhere

kk: been at the gym for an hour about to go hit the rink

you: send workout pics 😜

—-

kk: hiiiiiiiiii

you: hi babe

kk: tone down that attitude plz

you: ?

kk: actually

kk: turn around show me that ass

you: are u drunk rn

kk: maybe

kk: you have an amazing ass do i tell u that enough

kk: i should tell u more

kk: i love ur ass

you: thank u…

you: do u need to be picked up?

kk: no laila is dd

kk: wanted to talk to my pretty girl

you: u sure know how to make a girl blush

kk: only u babe

kk: i like ur boobs too

you: oh my god pls hand the phone to laila

kk: this is laila don’t worry we’re going home rn

you: laila ur a goddess thank u

kk: i try ❤️❤️

—-

[palms-upturned]

🇵🇸 Match My Donations! 🇵🇸

(Emoji description: two uses of the Palestine flag emoji, end description)

Round 2 of donation matches! This time I have a few friends helping me cover everyone on this list! I will link to the other donation match posts once they’re up. Huge thank you to everyone who volunteered to help, and to everyone who matched my donations last round.

Match Atticus’s donations!

Match Flo’s donations!

Match Kile’s donations!

Match Danny’s donations!

Match time-is-restored’s donations!

Match Star’s donations!

All of these fundraisers have been vetted, and most of the verifications are sourced from this spreadsheet compiled by el-shab-hussein and nabulsi.

If you reblog with donation receipts, image descriptions would be very much appreciated! Feel free to copy and paste/edit mine.

Today I’m donating $5 USD/€5/£5 to each of these campaigns:

Laila Shaqoura — @lailashaqoura, number 152 on the spreadsheet

Wafaa Alnhal — @wafs-posts, number 171 on the spreadsheet

Ruba Shaban — @rubashabansblog, number 90 on the spreadsheet

Issam Aziz — @haifaaziz98, number 179 on the spreadsheet

Amneh Sharif — @amnehsharif10, number 140 on the spreadsheet

Nada Saftawi — @nadasaftawi, number 182 on the spreadsheet

Iyad Sobhe — @iyadsobhegaza, number 173 on the spreadsheet

Dr. Nasser Mohammed — (terminated, formerly nassermohammed9), verified by nabulsi

Nahla & Amal — @jrk85, number 178 on the spreadsheet

Ahmed Iyd — (terminated, formerly ahmediyds), number 116 on the spreadsheet

Receipts below the cut:

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Laila’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated €5. Sharing is the next best way to help. €19,158 raised.” End alt text

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Wafaa’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated €5. Sharing is the next best way to help. €13,559 raised.” End alt text

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Ruba’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated €5. Sharing is the next best way to help. €24,626 raised.” End alt text.

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Issam’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated €5. Sharing is the next best way to help. €19,191 raised.” End alt text.

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Amneh’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated $5. Sharing is the next best way to help. $7,084 raised.” End alt text

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Nada’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated €5. Sharing is the next best way to help. €7,315 raised.” End alt text.

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Iyad’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated £5. Sharing is the next best way to help. £10,140 raised.” End alt text

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Dr. Nasser’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated £5. Sharing is the next best way to help. £5,278 raised.” End alt text

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Nahla & Amal’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated €5. Sharing is the next best way to help. €2,756 raised.” End alt text

Alt text: a gofundme receipt for Ahmed’s campaign. Text says, “Thank you for being an early supporter. You donated £5. Sharing is the next best way to help. £10,089 raised.” End alt text

[jarenka]

Remember this plot bunny? I was thinking about it again and I was like: Nah, Anakin wouldn't be able win against Palpatine to get him arrested. But he can kill Palpatine! So I wrote a fic where Anakin time-travels in the middle of Clone Wars, immediately kills the Chancellor and now Jedi Order need to do something about it because they can't just say: "Sorry, but Anakin Skywalker just returned here from the dark future and killed Palpatine because he was an evil genocidal wizard who planned to take over the Republic. Thank you for your attention."

“How did you find out that Chancellor Palpatine was directly connected with the separatists?”

“He told me himself”.

“Why would he tell you this? Don't you think this is a bit strange behavior for a person who allegedly has been cooperating with the separatists in deep secrecy for many years?”

“We are…” Anakin sighed. It was a touchy question. "Chancellor Palpatine and I were close friends. He proposed... to join him. He miscalculated”.

It isn’t entirelly true. Palpatine hasn’t yet invited Anakin to join him. He bent over his "dear friend", who fainted in his apartment when they had lunch together.

“Anakin, what's going on?.. I need to call a doctor,” Palpatine’s voice came to him distorted. Anakin was dead. He didn't know where he was or why he was hearing a real voice. He didn't know why he felt someone else's hand on top of his own. His lightsaber landed in his palm, and Anakin directed it to the place where the voice was coming from without hesitation. There was a smell of burnt wool and burnt flesh. Something heavy fell on him. When Anakin finally regained full consciousness, Chancellor Palpatine was lying there, completely dead, with a hole from a lightsaber in his chest.

“Why did Chancellor Palpatine invite you to join him?”

Anakin shrugged.

“I don't know.”

“Can you make a guess?”

“Perhaps he was dissatisfied with Dooku.”

Catch Dooku and ask, Anakin wanted to say, but for the past month Obi-Wan and lawyer Laila Hetty have been training him to answer questions correctly.

“So, you don't know for sure?”

“That's exactly what I have said.”

A military expert, a witness for the defense, will confirm that Dooku has failed several important operations in recent months. Perhaps Palpatine had a hand in his failures, but no one will ever know about it.

“What exactly did Chancellor Palpatine offer you?”

They set foot on very dangerous ground. Anakin needed to lie convincingly.

Anakin heard Obi-Wan's tired voice in his head, “You've been a Sith for over twenty years. You should be good at lying!"

He uttered the phrase he had memorized with Obi-Wan: “He offered me a place as commander-in-chief of the Republican army if I help him to prolong the war as much as he needs.”

“How can you, as a Jedi, hold such a post?"

Anakin sighed.

“Chancellor Palpatine wanted to get rid of the Jedi.”

There were whispers in the hall. Anakin tried to ignore them.

“Why?”

“You'd better talk to the members of the Council about this.”

“Did Chancellor Palpatine just casually tell you that he wanted to destroy the Order?”

Anakin closed his eyes and opened them again. He had to remind himself that everyone around him could see his face.

“I myself confessed to him that the Council suspected him of having ties with the separatists and was going to... take action.”

Obi-Wan Kenobi and Adi Gallia will speak on behalf of the Council. They will both say that some members of the council have long suspected that a very high-ranking official works with separatists, and some of them have already begun to suspect Palpatine. Obi-Wan won't be able to remember exactly if he and Anakin talked about it, but it's quite likely — after all, they were very close and discussed a lot of different things among themselves. Another witness for the defense will be an inhibitor chip specialist who will demonstrate that among the orders of the clone army there is an order to destroy the Jedi. He will indicate that this order was sewn in initially, during clone army creation. It’s not that important to Anakin’s case, both officials and independent investigators are now looking into clones’ creation.

“So, Master Skywalker, let's talk about why Chancellor Palpatine decided that you would agree to his proposal.”

I have no idea, Anakin wanted to reply.

“Remember,” he heard Obi-Wan say, “you need to present a convincing story to the jury. You killed Palpatine, it's quite obvious, but you can be acquitted.”

Anakin looked at the jury once again. They were ordinary inhabitants of Coruscant of different ages and races. Who do they see in front of them? The former posterboy of the Republic, pale and disheveled, with dark circles under his eyes. In the morning before the hearing Ahsoka tried to help him clean up, but she had no idea what to do with human hair. Maybe it's even better this way. The jury will think he's suffering terribly after he murdered Palpatine.

“Chancellor Palpatine,” Anakin began, “had already talked about me leaving the Order. He... he knew about my disagreements with the Council and was ready to help me settle on my own on Coruscant.”

“Were your disagreements with the Council that serious?”

“Perhaps I... exaggerated a little in my conversations with the Chancellor, and he thought that my conflict with the Council was much more serious than it really was.”

Anakin in fact remembered that the Council couldn't stand him, and everyone there didn't like him, except Obi-Wan. He thought they would hate him even more when they found out about everything he had done. Anakin was no longer one of them, he had been a Sith longer than he had been a Jedi, right before his death he turned away from the Dark Side but committed numerous crimes before it. And yet the Order came to his defense. It would be much more convenient for them to leave Anakin at the mercy of Republican justice. He would have received a life sentence for the murder of the chancellor and spent the rest of his life in prison. Anakin was ready for such a fate. It was still better than becoming a Sith, and better than losing Padme. She will stay alive, and maybe even visit him in prison.

Instead, the Council insisted on keeping Anakin in the Temple instead of handing him over to the Coruscant detention center. Master Windu came to him and said: “Anakin, you will be judged by a jury, but I'm afraid they won’t like a time-travel story.”

“I know,” Anakin replied. “You didn't have to come here to tell me about it.”

It seemed to him then that Master Windu wanted to gloat. This was a stupid thing to think.

“During the investigation, they will most likely find some evidence that the chancellor passed information to the separatists. And if you prepare well for the trial, you may be acquitted. We will help you.”

“Why would you help me? I'm not a Jedi anymore.”

“That's not true. You're still a Jedi knight, you have a Padawan, and you killed a Sith who planned to seize power in the Republic and destroy the Order. It's the least we can do for you."

Anakin chuckled.

“The least”? And then what counts as “the most"?”

“We won’t talk about it, it’s illegal”.

Mace Windu smiled with the corner of his mouth.

“I know a very good lawyer,” he said. “She and Master Kenobi will help you prepare for the interrogations.”

After that Mace Windu came to him more than once, asked about the Sith, brought datachips with holodramas and recordings of theatrical plays. Obi-Wan brought him records of pod races and his favorite books. Anakin's cell was spacious enough to train, and he had long been used to doing it alone. It turned out that even the prison in the Temple was a much cozier place than his castle on Mustafar or his personal quarters abroad of the “Executor”.”

Adi Gallia came to ask him about Palpatine's ties with different shady groups. Anakin knew about them, although Palpatine didn’t reveal everything even to Darth Vader, his apprentice and right hand man.

“Are you going to conduct your own investigation?” he asked.

“I'm afraid the Order can't afford to investigate. But we can tell someone where exactly they need to dig.”

Anakin was sure that she was talking about official investigators with unnecessary secrecy, and had no good feelings about it. Most likely they, too, were corrupted by Palpatine and would not investigate his machinations too actively, if they didn’t want to accidentally investigate themselves.

A month and a half later, Obi-Wan brought him a datachip and with a large joint investigation of The Evening News and The Point that Chancellor Palpatine was transferring money to several criminal organizations through shady firms under the jurisdiction of the Confederacy of Independent Systems. Journalists were able to trace some money to bounty hunters who carried out the chancellor's orders.

“Six months ago,” Obi-Wan said, “someone killed two The Point journalists who were investigating the creation of a clone army.”

“Has anyone reacted to this article?”

“Oh, it caused a full scale outrage. Our media was scaring us with separatists and bounty hunters for years and now it turns out that the Chancellor of the Republic is tied to both of them.”

“It won't hurt the Chancellor in any way. He's dead.”

“But it means that the Chancellor has committed treason, and you... hmm, maybe you didn't act very wisely, because the Chancellor should be convicted by the court, but at the end of the day your actions were justifiable.”

“He's a Sith, he couldn't have been arrested. He would have had time to give the order to destroy the Jedi. And besides, he could bribe investigators and judges.”

“We know that. But for an ordinary citizen of the Republic, you broke the law and killed the Chancellor instead of initiating an investigation. You need to show that you had no other choice, and you acted in the interests of the Republic.”

“So, the last question. Let's go back to why you killed Chancellor Palpatine instead of reporting him to the authorities?”

This last question was perhaps the most difficult. He couldn't answer it directly. Anakin had many reasons to kill Palpatine, but nobody would believe a time-travel story. Jedi agreed not to touch on this topic at the trial.

It's good that Obi-Wan came up with a plausible explanation for me, he thought. During the time they were preparing for the trial, Anakin even managed to convince himself that Obi-Wan has a point.

“At first I planned to do so. The Chancellor committed high treason, he should have been arrested,” he replied. “But I've known Chancellor Palpatine for a long time. He is… he was a very careful person, and he always had a backup plan. As you said, he wouldn’t just confess his crimes to me, a Jedi General," Anakin thought that here he might be suspected of insincerity. He was speaking in Obi-Wan's words, not his own. — “And then I realized that the Chancellor would not let me live if I refused to join him. Probably he planned to poison me, but I didn't think about it back then. I just realized that I would not have the opportunity to inform someone about his crimes. General Skywalker would accidentally die of natural causes, and Chancellor Palpatine would continue to act on his plans.”

To his surprise, one of the policemen later confirmed that they found a container full of lycaea extract in the Chancellor's apartment. It was a rare poison from Outer Rim that couldn’t be detected with standard tests, and the consequences of poisoning looked like a heart attack. “How did you guess he would have the poison?” Anakin asked Obi-Wan later. “If I were him, I would keep something like this in case of an emergency. Being a Sith he could kill a person with his lightsaber or strangle them with the Force, but such a death wouldn’t look natural. "Natural" deaths occur mainly from poison.”

[cosmopretty]

Laila Edwards x Fem

Headcannons

You wear her jerseys to all her games

Kissing her through the barrier before games for good luck

Stealing her clothes 24/7

She forced you to go live together on TikTok

You lay your body down on the floor next to Laila in between her and KK, you yawn laying your head on Laila’s shoulder as she talks to her fans on live. She lays her head on top of yours while reading some comments “My girlfriend is tired but I’m forcing her to stay up for you guys everyone thank her” Laila tells the live looking at you while you roll your eyes at her.

“Shut up that’s why KK cracked your phone screen a few minutes ago” You tease her sticking you tongue out pointing to the cracks at her phone. KK and Emma burst out laughing while Shane disses Laila on live about her phone “OKAY ENOUGH THIS IS NOT GANG UP ON LAILA TIME” she says loudly pushing your head off of her shoulder.

The live comments blow up with comments about you guys being cute together, you smile and kiss her on the cheek “Guys no ganging up on my girl” you state shaking your head no. Laila side eyes you “You started this baby” she deadpans turning her head to look at you. You blush and look down embarrassed “My bad bae” you mumble scratching the back of your neck while she wraps at arm around you and going back to talking to her fans.

Her convincing you to make TikTok’s with her all the time

Having to teach you dances step by step and getting frustrated when you keep messing up

She can never keep her hands off of you when your together

Hand on your thigh, arm around your shoulder or waist, holding your hand

Laila is 6’1 and she loves the height difference between you both

You walk down into the locker room after practice searching for your girlfriend. Spotting Laila with her skates on you run up to her hugging her waist, your head only reaching her stomach due to the extra inches of the skates. KK laughs at you “Yo compared to Laila right now you look more tiny than usual” she teases pulling Cassie to come take a picture of you both. Flipping them both off you look up at Laila frowning “Take them off you look like a giant it’s scary” you pout leaving your chin on her stomach looking up at her through your lashes.

Laila pouts at you back “But you look so cute from up here” she coos both of her big hands grabbing you cheeks squishing them together. Furrowing your brows you roll your eyes at her crossing your arms, she gets the hint and sits down un lacing her skates.

Standing up she still looks down at you, your head just reaching above her chest “See still short” she says looking down at you smiling. Groaning you walk away from her and go out of the locker room, her speed walking behind you. Laila grabs you from behind her hands wrapping around your waist, lifting you in the air turning you around. She lets go keeping her hands on your hips “I’m sorry okay it’s cute I love how small you are compared to me” she admits to you bending down slightly to kiss your lips.

You wear her hoodies all the time them being oversized for you

The team is always making fun of how she is soft for you and joking around about the both of you

Cooks for you whenever your hungry

She is so clingy when she’s tired

Waking up you feel something heavy on your waist, you turn around with Laila’s arm around your waist. You brush one of her braids from her face and she whines opening her eyes looking at you. Smiling at her in good morning, you move to get up out of her bed. Laila groans and pulls you back towards her “No no you’re not leaving” she mumbles spooning you.

Her leg comes around you above your waist as she puts her head in your neck leaving a few warm kisses. Wiggling in her arms you turn around again “We gotta get ready baby” you tell her looking down at her lips for a moment before back into her eyes.

“No no you stay here with me” Laila says pulling you into her chest wrapping her arms around your head and neck, not letting you move. You knew it was pointless trying to get out of bed so you relax in her arms slowly falling back asleep in her arms.

She is the sweets soul ever always doing everything she can to make you happy

10/10 kisser she grabs the back of your head and just kisses you

Having matching Pajamas together

Both of you trying to discipline Shane on live when he curses

Shane calling you “his favorite auntie”

Laila calls you “baby” “mama” “my girl” “ pretty girl”

You call her “baby” “precious” “ma”

Watching her workout in the gym while you sit and relax

[aces-and-angels]

lunch break by the wonderfully talented @mimibayra (click for better quality)

hello friends✨

i am beyond honored to be sharing this amazing artwork i had done for @oh-so-youre-a-nerd and @saibug1022. elliott's done so many beautiful pieces for the windverse, it was about time i returned the favor🖤 mags is notorious for skipping meals, so to be sat down with wind over a basket of pastries is nothing short of a miracle 😂

this art was thanks to a donation i personally made to the following gfm campaign. i would like everyone to take the time to meet laila:

pictured above is laila and her four siblings; photo taken from laila's gfm page

(please read more below):

---

an excerpt from laila's campaign (organized by ahmed shaqqoura, laila's uncle; note this is only a portion of what is written and i strongly encourage you to read the whole passage)

---

from laila's tumblr @lailashaqoura:

a ss of one of laila's calligraphy pieces (full post here)

laila reached out to me three days ago (see here) asking to share her story with you all. her campaign has been vetted/verified by multiple sources that i've double checked:

source one // source two (laila's campaign is listed as #152 on the sheet made by @/nabulsi and @/el-shab-hussein) to learn more on how to double check if campaigns have been vetted/verified: read here

since my initial post (6/7), laila's family has raised $1,839. those additional funds were made possible by people continuing to spread laila's message. to stand with palestinians is to see them for who they are. to read their stories and understand that they are more than the horrific conditions they have endured for years. they are mothers- fathers- brothers- sisters- and so much more. laila is one of many brilliant lights that deserves to continue to showcase her talents as an artist with the world. she deserves to live out her dreams- as well as the rest of her family

@/mimibayra is currently offering her time and talents to making art like this for anyone who donates to not only laila's campaign, but others she has mentioned on her donation commission sheet. feel free to reach out to her for any questions you may have!

another artist i want to highlight here is @palentonga who is also offering art for those able to donate. i know a few of my moots here are dnd fans- and she specializes in making portraits for dnd characters. it was actually through her account that i was able to find @/mimibayra in the first place. visit her 📌 for more info on her donation commissions

while it is heartbreaking to read the stories coming from palestine, it is also a privilege to know them. i may never get to meet laila and her family face to face- but i still feel connected to them in a way that i never thought to be possible. there is beauty in knowing that you can care so deeply- feel as strongly- about their cause. to quote @/fairuzfan (a palestinian blogger):

"there is still hope. say it out loud. palestine will be free. the palestinian people will celebrate their culture and heritage with each other. we will love and be loved. do not fall into the trap of despair." read full post here

for anyone who can, please consider matching my donation:

and if you can't donate, please share laila's story and continue to make space for her and her family in your heart. stay present and engaged for them and everyone else in palestine. listen to those who are sharing their lives and experiences so openly whilst facing tremendous suffering, not just here on tumblr, but on any platform you may have. it is never to late to stand with them. because we are not free until they are all free

if you made it this far, thanks for sticking around 🖤

[farawaysoph-ie]

The Sunshine Court Incoherent Whatever (pt.1)

Okay. Okay.

I just finished The Sunshine Court and 1) Jean Moreau what have you done to me? 2) Jean Moreau what have(n't) they done to you?

I started this, then went and re-read tkm (bc the obsession was always latent and never gone), so I could compare both Neil and Jean pov and well, suffice to say I'm not okay and I feel too much.

Thank you Nora Sakavic, it was painful and amazing.

I have a long train ride so I might as well bring back my incoherent whatever after *checks the notes* 4 years :')

As always this will be so full of spoilers.

(Unrelated spoiler: the train ride wasn't enough)

Let's start with the general:

After loving Neil maybe too much the shift to Jean took awhile to adjust to but now I'm ready to fight at least three mafia families, every single hater (fictional or otherwise) and the FBI for him

Jeremy Knox was everything, but like everyone on here, what are you hiding Jeremy?? What's going on??

Cat and Laila, my beloved ™️ the care these two effortlessly gave made me cry

This whole book was a serious trigger for me, but I'm in too deep with this series, imagine me like that Simpsons meme, I did it for my new french son

Characters, thoughts:

I said before the Ravens were a cult, but I hadn't really understood that statement. Every time Jean spoke of them it hit deeper and deeper how messed up and unfair it all was.

Boy am I happy that Riko is dead, like I didn't really wish anyone the fate of being shot by an unfeeling older brother, until Jean's pov hit me like a high speed train.

Andrew spoke exactly one word in this, still was iconic and a scene stealer, how in character for him

I forgot how much I always want to slap Kevin Day when he's trying his best to be annoying, it's because I love him, I swear! (But seriously his relationship with Jean is so complex and well executed I will think about it for a very long while)

I didn't give much thought to Renee and Jean relationship in tkm, but it broke my heart here, it's when I started to actually tear up, I love them so much rainbows, a cool evening breeze. I can't.

"Tell me something"

"Where are you now?"

The whole dynamic of the Cat&Laila& sometimesJeremy's apartment

Cat teaching Jean how to cook + motorbike ride (open roads)

Laila taking him to shopping

Jeremy wanting to make Jean Moreau the Person his success story

Neil dragging Jean towards survival without giving him a choice, again and again: he sent Renee as gentle bait, closed a deal in his name with a mafia boss, promised him he would win against Riko in his name too, promised him again Riko was dead, ordered a hit on his rapist, offered to delay the talk with the FBI, linked his sister to his name, to survival and to what he deserved. I NEED more interactions between them, I am not above begging.

I have to get a better idea on the other Trojans, but for now the policule was cute, I need more Cody and less Lucas. Like I can understand where he was coming from? But he needs to shut up now, you made your mess man, now go play Exy like you were supposed to.

I miss the Foxes :'(

Wymack! I almost forgot everyone's favourite dad-coach: he showed up, brought alcohol, got more tired, delivered care to yet another traumatized child, spent a whole day on airplanes to bring him to Los Angeles, left him money for clothes&co. bc he's not doing this again, answered his call when he was having The Breakdown. Best dad-coach ever in the history of dad-coaches.

Plot things:

Jean at the beginning was so scared and in so much pain it took a while to get a clear picture of him as a person

Still loved all his salty comments and insults, he couldn't help himself

Renee sitting with him and caring with Abby and Wymack :')

Jean being afraid of going back and of not going back to Evermore, hating the ones that got to leave

The self harm and all the people in this that fought him to keep his hands from his neck, his scars, himself

"I am Jean Moreau. My place is at Evermore. I will endure."

Jean not believing in Wymack care, waiting for the act to end and the other shoe to drop

The disbelief at Kevin being away from the court and him admitting he went at knifepoint (and meaning it literally), sometimes this was a comedy

Wymack, Jean, and the burning of houses

Jean's opinion of the Foxes going from those mediocre fools to those mediocre madmen to the madmen that actually beat Riko Moriyama

Wymack putting Jean's phone in the freezer and hating computers

“That man is years overdue for a high-speed, head-on collision.” couldn't have said it better, but Neil was already on it at that point

"Jean knew better than to look for anger in his stare; the best Kevin could manage was bottomless guilt."

“It was my only chance,” Kevin said. “I knew you wouldn’t come with me.” “My place is at Evermore,” Jean agreed, “but you did not have to slit my throat on the way out.”

“Your blind loyalty to those clowns is exhausting.” “Some of them you like,” Kevin reminded him. “Don’t you dare,”

Nathaniel "Hello Jean" Wesninski vs Jean "Go away" Moreau

This whole conversation went very differently compared to tkm: like there Neil came, dropped a metaphorical bomb, glossed over the explanation and went away trying to convince Andrew they are something

Jean was ambushed by two of his most complicated acquaintances (???) and their "pet goalkeeper" (god I need Andrew's reaction to this "nickname", but I guess no one will ever say this to his face, Neil would be too busy fighting you at the suggestion to ever repeat it), had his worldwiew turned upside down with no chance of having a say in the matter, then was left alone with Kevin Day and the aftermath.

So yes two different conversation; also I kinda forgot of the deal about Neil and his smile

“Everyone who has tried to tame him has failed.”

All for the game: a summary

There was no getting away; there was only getting through.

Jean Moreau who (hasn't) hurt you, part some of too many

What really makes it messed up is that on one hand there was Riko and his mad cruelty and on the other there was an entire team of bystanders At Best: some people were an active part and then pretended, no sympathy for them; others decided to ignore the truth to survive and get what they wanted, which I can understand but I guess they still didn't have the decency to shut up when Jean got away. The anger that crawled through my skin when the smear campaign and the notebook/postcards/magnets thing happened. You should have stayed silent until the end you fucks.

“Do it, then. It wouldn’t take much; we all know I have brittle bones.”

Jeremy pov kinda gave you whiplash, with him waking up super early, helping homeless men, but then you start noticing all the things he avoids almost effortlessly and like, what are you hiding sunshine man??

What actually broke me about his povs was him noticing all these details about Jean, and then misinterpreting them, bc whatever he's been through Jean has had it 100 times worse and this doesn't even factor in Jeremy world. I'm pretty sure he'll get the whole truth in the end and I'm scared of what it'll do to him.

Also Jean being like Ravens always had to keep secrets and then spilling most of them almost unprompted, let's laugh in order not to cry

“He hasn’t played a clean game in years,” Kevin admitted, “but he knows how to follow orders. If you tell him to submit, he will.” “Literally the most awkward way you could’ve worded it,” Jeremy said.

This will keep coming back, Kevin please. (He 100% ships it, one of us)

The Foxes catching the too tired Trojans and Jeremy being like, you are all approved (I need the two teams to interact now)

Also the Trojans being like how are they still standing, Neil how are you still running??

Someone pointed out they wanted Neil to interact with Jeans closest teammates bc if he is a madman by Jean standards, what would normal people make of him? To which yes, but also guys consider this: Neil said to Cat and Laila that they were terrifying after the semifinal, he took a step back when Jeremy opened the door and silently invited him in. I need Neil and the floozies to interact so Neil can experience real fear.

Mafia bosses have nothing on wholesome people, the true weakness of one Neil Josten

Jean immediately hanging up on Jeremy will never not be funny

When you get to the title of the book and it's Jean insulting people <3

I will Never, NEVER, get over the "nineteen". Never.

I love Abby but when she told that bit about fighting back, It Hurt. She probably didn't really mean it and didn't know everything bc how are you supposed to keep fighting when you are fifteen, alone and forsaken in a place that is built to break you? As it has been pointed out, Neil had rebellion beaten into him by a mother that chose him and ran; Jean had a sister that he hoped to protect and parents that sold him away like property. Five months were actually a long time.

Dobson keeps being iconic, I don't know what to think about the I don't know how exy works bit: I mean I've been obsessing with this and still don't know how exy works (plz don't hate me), but at the same time it was such a power move and got Jean to talk

“Of course it’d be you, you tedious malcontent.” “Good morning to you, too.” Nathaniel held up an oversized bandage.

You see why I need more of their interactions, right?

Nathaniel was different; he always would be. He wasn’t a Raven, but he was, same as Jean. He was Jean’s misplaced forever partner, an unfulfilled promise Jean had stopped believing in years ago.

You can now be forever partners while you tear down your families :)

I think that I'm stuck on the two of them bc while Kevin broke a promise to save himself (to which no hate, when dealing with madmen like Riko you have to save yourself) and still couldn't, not completely, Neil was a promise made and broken by other people. Jean hates him bc they were supposed to share a destiny and all the misery, but I think very deep down he knows that if Nathaniel had come to the Nest they would still be nursing wounds and appeasing a tyrant. Neil is the one that stood against Riko when Kevin wanted to hide, the one that gave him courage by example, the one that dragged Jean away from the Ravens, both for selfish reasons (taking down Riko) and better ones (paying him back for saving his life a the Nest).

But still

“You are only here now because you are an abominable cockroach,”

Funny how Neil forgot to tell us about the breakdown about Kevin's tattoo, he was probably thinking about the match. Junkie.

The cheese drawer guys, ???

To this day I still can't decide what was more iconic: Kevin Day switching playing hand halfway through the game and pretty much scoring everything until the last second, Neil being so fast that it made up for him being a shitty defender, Andrew crossing the court to keep Neil from being murdered (I'm biased, but still iconic moments all of them)

Experiencing this match from Jean's pov was amazing writing, like the countdown of the last ten seconds, the Riko-Neil bit without volume but from a different angle (I didn't really realize everyone was able to see the King attempting murder live on TV, but hey perspective)

Run, Jean thought. He didn't know if he was thinking it at Andrew or Nathaniel. Run.

"That wasn't a miracle," Jean typed out. "That was the Foxes."

:')

When Jean found about Riko though :'(

The shudder that wracked his chest should have been revulsion, but it fell dangerously short. This didn't feel like joy or relief; it only felt like loss. [...] Who was he without them?"

I loved that he woke up to Renee and Neil though, the rainbow and the witness

Renee always hitting the point, this wonderful girl

"Maybe you're mourning the wreckage he made of your life. You're allowed to grieve what he took from you."

"It's impressive, isn't it? How easily these monsters die in the end."

Neil Abram Josten said I'm done letting monsters ruin my life and my people, he actually promised.

When he called him Neil guys, tears

Also I found peculiar that when thinking about the room he destroyed Jean calls it "Neil's dorm room", not Kevin's who he's known for actually longer. It's what makes me think that they have a chance at not being misplaced forever anymore.

Renee either hits you with hidden wisdom of the universe or with practical and brutal advice, and we love her for that

The two of them, the Two Of THEEEEEEEEM

Jean noticed how Andrew and Neil moved like they were caught in each other's gravity, in each other's space more than they were out of it, cigarette smoke and matching armbands and lingering looks when one fell out of orbit for too long.

Just leaving this here.

The airport bit :'(

"Men like Wymack didn't exist. They couldn't; they shouldn't."

Enter Jeremy Knox and his yo-yo in the middle of said airport. Flawless.

This man was put on Earth to test Jean, at least that's what he will keep thinking from here on

The rest of this book is Jean having conversations with people and not understanding them, bc he's been living for five (seven) years in a cult. It is an escalation pretty painful to watch, I think the Trojans are all of us :'(

Question: will Jean end up teaching Jeremy French? Will Jeremy learn by himself? I think I'd probably prefer the latter

Cat, the mess, the music, the tour, I love her so much

Jeremy "he's a little off" Knox, he was trying

Barkbark von Barkenstein

Jean Moreau and the real world (bubble tea? you have to shop for stuff? you sign things yourself? you leave campus? someone help this disoriented french bean)

"Something had gone horribly wrong at Evermore"

oh Jeremy

Watching Jeremy regret almost all his questions :'(

“Three fractured ribs. Sprained LCL. Twisted ankle. Broken nose. That’s most of it.” That’s most of it.

Laila, who pushed and got angry for Jean and didn't back down despite him lashing out, my beloved

You look like a Ken doll." + "This isn't blond."

"Not Grayson.[...] Please." that one made me sick, the writing made me feel even only a part of what Jean was feeling and it was enough to feel sick

The water :'(

Jean just leaving when confronted with Laila and Jeremy in swimsuits was very bi of him

Lucas coming in looking like a well know nightmare and the Ravens dropping like flies

I didn't ask.

It's not like I didn't know, right? But I still died inside

Zane and the betrayal

Jeremy didn’t let him get away with it. “That’s not the issue and you know it. I don’t want to crowd you.” “You are not them,” Jean said. “Kevin would not have sent me here if you were.”

Jean taking one look at the doctor sent by the coaches and going nope, Dobson will be definitely better

Jeremy seeing the nightmares and the scars and not being able to do much:(

A hand on his chin startled him into looking up. When he met Jean’s eyes, Jean only said, “Focus on what’s important.” “I am,” Jeremy said. Jean opened his mouth, closed it again, and let go of Jeremy without a word. Jeremy snagged his arm when he started to turn away. “Who did this to you?”

I'm sorry did he just

“It’s not about size, anyway.” “Defensive,” Jean said, tugging his glove straps with his teeth. Jeremy straightened in indignation. “I don’t have anything to be defensive about.” Jean lost his grip and bit his lip, and Jeremy hurried on before either of them could think too much about that double entendre.

“Say ‘yes, Jeremy’.” He had the distinct impression Jean wanted to roll his eyes. “Yes, Jeremy.” Jeremy forgot everything else he could have said in favor of staring. It was the first time he’d heard Jean say his name.

Are you seeing this? Yes? Good, let's go on

“If I ever make you uncomfortable or make you feel unsafe, will you promise to tell me? If you don’t trust me enough to tell me what’s wrong and why, at least trust me enough to tell me that something is wrong. I can’t fix things if I don’t know there’s a problem. As your captain and your partner, don’t I at least deserve the chance to not be a villain in your story?”

The pool bit :'( and after when they tell there are no pools at Evermore. Riko is so lucky to already be dead :)

You’re forcing us to hurt you without giving us any say in the matter.”

Watching Jean trying to navigate his interactions with the Trojans was painful, frustrating but also hopeful. This boy has been hurt so much and so often, he doesn't get what normal looks like anymore. But the Trojans don't let him get away with it (even if it breaks their heart and the coaches will probably get a lot of grey hair from this)

"Your safety and happiness will always be more important than our season.” “You are naïve.” “Maybe you’ll define success by how we do this season, but I’m not obligated to do the same. You are going to be my success story: Jean Moreau the person, not Jean Moreau of the perfect Court. You take care of one, and I’ll take care of the other.” “That is not how it works.” “Is there a rule against it?” “There is no merit to it. This is all I am.” Jeremy ignored that and asked again, “Is there a rule against it?”

Jeremy gay panicking and the photo of Renee

The floozy line!

Every time Jeremy goes "our coaches" or "our teammates" all I can think in my head is "someone will die" "of fun!!!!"

Jean wondering if the Trojans have something against recruiting tall players xD

“Thank you for worrying about them. You’re a good man, Jean Moreau.” “A ridiculous sentiment,” he said. “I mean it,”

This man didn't even second guess himself, he had to ask because he knew and it didn't even occur to him to be silent. Excuse me sir? Shut up you are a good man

“I assumed the Trojans were idiots,” Jean said. “Now I think you are all insane.” “It’s a step up,” Cody said. “I’ll take it.”

The practices, the scars pt2

“It is all I am, Coach.”

“We did not want outsiders at Evermore.” “Except Neil,” Cat said. “Neil was a special case,” Jean allowed.

#accurate

You’re hurting me.” “It has been toward for five years,” Jean said, looking past Jeremy at the scrimmage that was still going on without them. “It is not that easy to undo.” Jeremy frowned at him and echoed, “Five? You were only with the Ravens for three.” “I moved into Evermore two years before I enrolled,” Jean said, and hauled Jeremy to one side. The stray ball that had been coming for them ricocheted off his chest instead of Jeremy’s back, and Jean scooped it up on the rebound with a quick snap of his wrist. He hurled it across the court toward Cody one-handed before finally letting go of Jeremy. “I will try harder.”

The notebooks breakdown hurt so bad bc Cat and Laila being angry for him (they are all of us), Jeremy trying to mediate bc he's been there, he pushed and Jean broke and he doesn't want to hurt him, and Jean who confesses his secrets without meaning to, just to realize and panic. What a recipe for a disaster.

“How dare they blame you for anything after what they did to you. How dare you grieve them.” It hit like a sucker punch, but Jean’s frustrated rejoinder was worse: “They don’t know.”

They don't know, but they could guess. They could smell the blood. They joked about his brittle bones. He was sixteen. I'm not sorry for the mercy I don't have after finishing this book

Jeremy could only watch in wretched silence as Jean tried to walk himself back from the edge. He cast his phone aside in favor of catching Jean’s face in his hands, and the way Jean flinched at his touch was almost his undoing. “Hey,” he said quietly. “Hey. Jean. Look at me.” Jean refused, and Jeremy grasped desperately for anything that could bring Jean back to him. He seized on the only thing he could and threw Jean’s words back at him: “You are Jean Moreau. Your place is here with me, with us. I’m your captain. You’re my partner. We’re supposed to be doing this together, aren’t we? Stop leaving me behind. Look at me.” It wouldn’t work, but it did. Jean opened his eyes to meet Jeremy’s stare. “I told you not to ask me about him.”

I had seen the quote before reading but no one told me what followed ç.ç

He felt a tremor in Jean’s hands, and for a blinding moment he was sure Jean would lean into the safety of this silent confession. But Jean only sucked in a slow breath and said, “Now I am not safe with you, captain.” Letting go of Jean was the hardest thing Jeremy had ever done. Everything in him railed against this, and for a moment he regretted giving Jean a way out.

I was not crying, I swear.

“I’m sorry,” Jeremy said, because he didn’t have the strength for small talk or a softer approach right now. “Did Riko break your hand?”

That was one heavy conversation and it's just the start (Jeremy is Not Fine™️)

He is not used to having a voice, and he has never had power. I cannot promise he will ever talk to you.” “I will wait as long as it takes,” Jeremy said.

Still best boy

And maybe in many ways he still was, but a martyr could still be a monster when the cameras weren’t rolling.

Boy do I have news for you (do you think Jeremy will know that Riko didn't kill himself? Does it matter? I think not knowing this particular detail would be fine, I still don't really know how much this sunshine boy can take (more than I expected but still))

Did I mention that I really love the apartment trio? Cat and Laila agreeing to silence but still being angry (drag them girls, draaaaag them), the dinner and movie and Jean not getting up to leave

Did I mention Lucas is free to shut up and play? :) Because I get that you are angry, but 1) it's not your decision to make, we don't need your conspiracy theories 2) it's not Jean problem, he has enough of them leave him alone

“Ask him why he’s so sure the rumors are true. Ask him what his part in it was. If you’re going to believe him just because he’s blood, then at least make him tell you the truth.” “What’s that supposed to mean?” Lucas demanded.

And Jean still deciding not to lie, he may be an asshole but almost everyone he has known didn't deserve him

Also I don't know where Lucas got the audacity? You think there is something the justifies breaking a player's ribs?? What is wrong with you, you are part of the sunshine court

The dread when asking if Grayson was home

The bike ride :')

Now that they were settled, he expected an interrogation or a reason for this unscheduled trip out. When she failed to explain herself, Jean finally asked, “Why are we here?” “I love it here,” [...] “I don’t know. I just felt like some fresh air would do you good. There’s nothing like a ride to get you out of your head and into the moment, you know?” Jean considered that for a minute. “Thank you.”

Jean waited until he was out of earshot. “I don’t understand.” “Trust us,” Jeremy said tiredly. “Neither do we.”

Jean vs the Trojans, a summary

The monster shows up and it was a mess and Jean has never had a break, literally never

Which was extremely literal bc Lucas wanted to talk and then Neil shows up

I need a separate post for the last pages bc I started this 24 h ago and I want to do it justice. So part 2 coming.

Edit: I misspelled Jean's surname *facepalms and goes to hide*

[lailawinchesterr]

part four, hospital visit [jensen ackles]

series masterlist | main masterlist

four, 

Hey, you have a headache?

It was messages like these, full of so much care and thoughtfulness, that made me remember why i ignored the man in the first place. I'm a mess, i get emotional and attached and no one would want to date that. 

No, thank you for last night.

I don't remember much, just that Jensen helped me into my house and into bed, i'm not sure where he went after that, probably the hospital. I called Jack this morning and he told me where they both were, i made sure to tell her that i'll be there and to make sure she was okay.

You took the Cataflam on the nightstand? 

You were really tired.

He doesn't answer my 'thank you', so he doesn't let the conversation end, but i don't want to talk to him, not after last night. I hate being that way with people, especially after i spent years of my life trying not to be that person. Everyone in my life left me when they saw how high maintenance i am, learning from my mistakes only after i make them over and over, it makes me a child in their eyes. The thing is, it does in mine too, because i've been like this since i was 18, and it's put such a heavy strain on me that I felt stuck for years.

I'm fine Jensen, really.

Thanks for the Cataflam.

No problem, call me if you need anything. 

I won't, but if it makes him feel better i heart the message and close the chat, opening jared's.

Need a ride.

On my way.

+

"Rach? Oh my God." I run over to her, hugging her harshly and she winced underneath me, it doesn't faze me as much as it should though because i am just so relived she's fine.

"Lils, i'm so sorry i did this to you, i shouldn't have sprung that onto you i'm so sorry." I can't believe she's in a hospital bed and apologizing for 'springing this on me'. I love this woman.

"Shut up." I hug her again, quickly and tightly, before saying hi to everyone else; Jack, Gen, Alona and Adri. We all just sit there, laughing and helping her keep her mood up when a soft knock comes from the door. I don't look up from my phone to text my mum a quick 'I'm okay' text. 

"Hey, sweetheart." Husky, rough, sugary, thick; pick your poison. Jensen's voice made him Jensen in a way beyond explaining, it made him so Jensen that i wouldn't know what to do if i don't hear his 'good morning' every other day on set. 

Rachel responds to his endearment with a smile and hugs him. When they let go places the flowers he bought her on the nightstand. "Get well soon, darlin'." She nods, corner of her lip tugging into a smile but it hardly reaches far with how much pain she's in so he just stands next to Jared & Jack, on her left, us on her right.

Jensen says a quick 'hey guys' to the girls but then he just stared at me for a few seconds before smiling, and i smile back, then face the floor, leaning on Alona's shoulder and she rubs my back.

A few hours of all of us chearing Rach up, and grabbing food, quickly pass and everyone needs to go home because shooting is still happening tomorrow. They're grateful they even got today off (though the whole team has been understanding of Rachel's situation).

I stand up to wish everybody well with a 'bye' and a hug since i'm staying the night with Jack. When i'm done, Jensen walks over to me expectantly and i just wish everything would go back to how it was three days ago, maybe we could've even gone on our little date. 

"Hey." It sounds like i'm out of breath but he smiles nonetheless and it's infectious in the best way possible.

"Hey, laila." He says, stepping closer before Jared quickly breaks us up by calling out my name.

"What time do you want me to come take you?" I'm about to respond when Jensen shakes his head in Jared's direction, which is enough for him to apparently get the message so he leaves. 

"What was that?"

"I'll come pick you up, whatever time you want. Jared wants to be with gen right now, she needs him." He doesn't mean any harm, in fact he means so well it makes my heart swell, but in my head his tone has an underlying tone as if to say 'you're burdening them so i'm taking the weight a little'.

"You don't need to, i can walk or uber, i'm close anyways." 

"You're twenty minutes away."

"That's close." He shakes his head, insisting on his offer. 

"I'm picking you up, what time?"

"Anytime. Get me on your way back home from set." He nods and i look up to notice his eyes for the first time. Not the first time ever, obviously Jensen's eyes are hard not to notice, but with how often i keep my eyes on the ground around him i don't usually get to see how truly beautiful they are. 

"I'll be here, stay safe, Laila." It shakes me out of my thoughts and i mutter a 'dont worry' before walking away to Rach's bed quickly. 

God, i want this day to end, it's already nine in the evening and i'm ready to call it a day on the chair next to her bed. 

Me and Rachel talk for a while, and then i keep talking more until her eyes close involuntarily and i finally feel myself relax into a deep sleep too.

+

"Laila?" Jensen's hurried voice wakes me up with a gasp, scanning my surroundings so fast it almost gives me whiplash, and it actually does give me a migraine.

I groan, hands over my eyes, rubbing them while he hands me a glass of water from the small desk next to me. "Here, it's past two." 

Oh my God.

"Jensen, you're joking! I'm so sorry i totally lost track of time, i've just been so tired—"

"Hey, it's fine," he smiles, his hand reaches my face to stroke away some flyaway strands of hair. "You're good, just get ready so you can sleep in an actual bed." I let out a small laugh and nod, moving to the bathroom after kissing rachel's head on my way there.

I get home in one piece, and with little to no damage to my reputation with Jensen. I ask him how set was, how filming been. He asks me what I did yesterday. And just as i'm about to thank him again for the umpteenth time before leaving, he locks his car doors. I furrow my eyebrows and look up at him.

"Tell me what's wrong."

He lowers the radio down till it's barely audible as i let out a confused, "What?" 

"Tell me why you've been acting like this for however long we've known each other. You're okay with everyone else, then i come into a room and suddenly you have to get to work or make breakfast or paint your car. I need to know what's making you act like this." He says it with such frustration and it makes me feel guilty for all the things i've done to him but can't undo, or worst yet, i wouldn't. 

It digs up too many memories. It isn't like i'm in love with jensen, i just like him a little too much and i don't have experience with that, in fact, i've never dated a guy, so my small crush turned into a small overreaction. Besides, before I can to America all I could hear, every single day was how 'obsessive' or 'high maintenance' I am, it stuck with me for as long as I remember, I've tried to never get attached to people. I'm still trying.

"Nothing, seriously. I was just stupid the first day we met." I decide telling half the truth, "i thought you were attractive so i kind of got embarrassed and made it seem like I'm just shy or something. Couldn't go back and make you think i was stupid." 

"But making me think you hate me was better? If you're embarrassed, you laugh it off, you don't ignore the person for years. Besides, you thought i was hot? Laila, you're fucking gorgeous, but i don't run away from you." i shouldn't be smiling as much as i am right now, or blushing, but i can't help it, he's just been really honest in a way that kind of makes me feel more embarrassed. But the good kind, if there's even such a thing. it takes a bit of the guilt too, to know i wasn't the only one with those thoughts. Especially since he was with Danneel at the time. 

I think this the most me and Jensen have ever talked in one sitting.

"Okay... i'm sorry. I just, they're habits you know? And i didn't know what to do, i'm sorry. New beginnings?" He nods with a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes.

"New beginnings. I'd like for us to hang out eventually, without Jared's help this time." I laugh and make it a point to be as genuine as i can seem about making plans.

+

I talked to Jensen. We're going out next week.

Laila!!!!!

That's amazing

Fucking finally

Shut up i'm happy we talked

I'm sure i'll be okay, right?

Yes Lils you'll be great

And you'll be sure you tell me all about it

Really?

There's no doubt that Jared is the biggest hearted person i've ever met, but more than that, he's busy and almost always emotionally unavailable unless it's gen, which is why i opt for Rachel with these things, i can talk for days and she'd never get tired. And I don't mind that Jared doesn't like me talking too much about my feelings, I know it overwhelms him too.

Yeah, of course

Gen wants to know too!

I laugh, hearting the message and closing my phone. I think it's time to get some work done.

i've always found it hard to balance both my outside life and school life but ever since i've been friends with Jared i've hardly had problems with it, they're usually too busy to hang out because of their crazy schedules and i'm too scared to ask anyways so it works out in my favor. 

Besides, i've gotten to see them a little more as of recently since i've been doing modeling. An agency took me in a year ago but when the contract ended 6 months later they dropped me so i've been trying to find another job to help with money, not that my parents don't send any, but i'd like to be prepared. 

It doesn't take long for me to miss Rach while i try to finish the cardiovascular system module. What happened to my best friend, someone i love more that anything... It's scary. I don't want to think of what could possibly happen if it had went further.

Yeah, I'm not getting work done. I decide to go to make food instead.

part five

I wrote like 4 more chapters I think i don’t know where I’m getting ideas but thank god for it, anyways! Reblog and comment if you liked this chapter & thank you for reading💗

tags: @kr804573

[acrosstobear]

Can I ask why you said the less we say about Mick the better on the post with Laila. I met Mick several times over the course of the weekend at Cota and he was lovely and so obliging. Laila is fab too

oh that’s so interesting!!! i got quite lucky meeting him on Friday first thing but i definitely caught him off guard a little i think. I asked him to pick a bracelet (i made 4 for him) and he was like “whichever” (compared to David and Pato and Callum who were all super thoughtful about it when i gave them the same choice) and just — honestly didn’t smile all weekend. he did one of the 2 autograph sessions with his airpods in, and while his teammates joked around with the funny custom glasses i made them, when i gave him his he just smiled tightly and said thanks. he didn’t really want to stop for any pictures during the rest of the weekend (though was apparently more obliging at the end of the day, i wasn’t there for those) and when we stopped Laila after the race he legit rolled his eyes.

in general i try to be thoughtful about when i’m catching the drivers — either it’s an official autograph session or it’s during a time when i know they aren’t rushing anywhere, because i know they have a job to do. and look, everyone can have a bad day or a bad weekend and that’s why i didn’t want to make a big deal of it, but basically everyone i was with also noticed that he just didn’t seem engaged or excited to be there at all. i understand it, cause i know this isn’t his series of choice and basically just lost 3 straight seats in F1 in the last 2 weeks, but i’ve had better drivers interactions for sure. i’ve also had worse!!!!!! in no way did i find anything that he did this weekend rude (other than maybe the airpods). just wish i could gush about him like i do every time i meet Callum.

[under-the-eye]

My dear father, Johnathan Loomis, has gone to join the Watcher today.

I was in the middle of tummy time with Luke when I got the call from Mama. I was so surprised– he was only seventy, and always exercised and ate right; apparently he caught pneumonia and wouldn’t go to the hospital or take any antibiotics. That sounded like him.

Javi and I packed up the kids and went back to Newcrest for the funeral. Most of the extended family was there, too.

We buried him in a plot at the Parish, just as he wanted.

Through the whole service I couldn’t think of anything to say besides trying to comfort Mama. My father had been such a big presence, the patriarch of the whole family, and now he’s gone. Please take care of him, Watcher.

A couple of days after the funeral, Mama held a gathering in the old house, where Derek and Mary-Faith will live with her after this. I got to see many of my older siblings, like Iris and Isla, and their children as well.

It was nice to see everyone again, even if the reason was sad. Mama said she invited Joshua, but he didn’t come. She didn’t say anything about James, Penny, or Maxine.

After dinner, Mama proudly presented me with what she called a “keepsake box”. She said it contained a photo of her and Dad, as well as a toy bear she knitted years ago, and that it would be my job to keep it and add to it, then pass it down. I was so honored to be gifted with a symbol of our family lineage. 

Then, as the party was winding down, she took me to a quiet corner.

Laila: Can I tell you a secret?

Mariah: Of course, Mama. Anything. 

Laila: It’s about your sister. She wrote a book about us. Johnathan never knew that I had a copy.

Mariah: Oh… wow. Did you read it?

Laila: I did. You don’t have to read it, but I wanted you to have it, anyway. 

Mariah: Thank you, Mama. I’ll think about it.

[vakarians-babe]

https://www.gofundme.com/f/ne9gzx-help-them-to-survive?utm_campaign=p_lico+share-sheet-first-launch&utm_medium=copy_link&utm_source=customer

Dear Friends,

I hope this message finds you well. I am writing to share an urgent plea for help. Due to the ongoing conflict in Gaza, my family and I have been forced to flee our home and seek refuge in Khan Younis. My mother, who is pregnant, is in critical need of assistance to ensure her safety and the safety of her unborn child.

We are facing severe hardships and are struggling to provide her with the necessary medical care and basic necessities. I have launched a campaign to raise funds for my mother's survival during this perilous time.

Your support in sharing our campaign on social media could make a life-saving difference. Please help us spread the word and gather the support we desperately need.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Sincerely,

Please help us by sharing the post on your page so that we can collect donations and get out of the war. You are our hope. I will be very grateful to you . ❤️🙏🏼

"this fundraiser is vetted by nabulsi, fallahifag, el-shab-hussein, ibtisams, sayruq"

Hi Laila, I will gladly share your campaign.

For everyone, I have shared Laila's campaign before but she and her family are still in need of help. As she says, multiple people have spoken on the veracity of her campaign.

Please share, and donate if you are able.

[saintsons]

— soft spot ╱ miles lee and laila somri

humans are creatures of habit. miles grew up with a routine that he followed down to his stretches before bed. with the way he moved, people would think that he was not human. what he chose to do, he always did it well. when he was held back, he'd press the limits for his goals—his efforts always pushed the fine boundary of success and overdrive. and while it had only been two months since the public announcement of his indefinite hiatus from the major leagues, miles lee had grown restless. “ don't worry, i'm okay. i promise that i'm okay. ” he says this like he could lie to someone like @sunshinesfm. his tone fails to match the look that follows. he avoids her eye contact and rolls over on the couch to readjust the ice pack. there's much to hide when his arm was covered in bandages. his finger tapes faded from white to brownish gray; he was picking at the curled ends before laila came around.

“ thanks for picking me up. i called my insurance to take my car into the shop. ” it had been an eventful day. when everyone seemed too caught up in their own troubles, he called laila. because she was always there. “ are you hungry? i can make something. ” he holds out his hand for the other and wears his best smile. “ i'm okay, ” he says again. it's more for himself but he also knows her too well to write off her acceptance as nonchalance. “ i appreciate you, lai. i'm just going through it. but i've got you and everyone else. let's not worry too much. ”

[problemduetest4life]

for the WIP game! either WHY WHY STFUUUU or Olympian, because I am OBSESSED with all the cookie wrappers, but I’m equally obsessed with angsty kevjean

thank you for sharing!

OMG thank you!!!

I'm trying to not post too much of the next chapter, because I'm still piecing it together but I'll give you another part of Olympia!

~

“Can you say something?” Laila suggested. “Since you’ve been out longer, you could—”

“No, I can’t.” Kevin said firmly.

“You can’t or you won’t?” posed Cat.

“It’s not that simple.”

“How? Can’t you see him hurting? He got attacked by one of your crazy ex-teammates! Do you even care?”

“Cat, calm down,” Jeremy interjected.

“Of course, I care!”

“Then say something! He got attacked! He has bite marks! His face was scratched and bleeding!”

“I know! I know a hell of a lot more than you do, so just stop!”

“Don’t yell at her!” Laila cut in.

“Everyone, let’s just take a breather.” Wymack was steadfast as always, moving himself between the Kevin and the Trojans as if a fight was about to break out.

“What ‘more’?” Jeremy asked. His voice was soft like he wasn’t looking for an answer as much as he was acknowledging Kevin’s admission.

You don’t know anything, Jean bit back. You left. You don’t know. You don’t know.

He was shaking under the weight of the unspoken words.

“Hey.” Someone was by his side. “It’s okay, it’s alright.”

It was not okay. It was not alright.

“Look what you did.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“Well, that’s for sure.”

“What does that mean?”

“I think you know.”

“Well, then why was Jean outside with Lucas, huh? Who thought that was a good idea? Which one of you let that happen?”

“Jean’s his own person. He can make his own choices.”

“He doesn’t! He doesn’t make his own choices when someone like that comes along, he does what they tell him to!”

There was a moment of horrible silence. The room seemed to tilt on some unseen axis.

~