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bardic-inspo · 5 months

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Dhampir Dreams

Pairing: Spawn Astarion x F!Tav (Generic/Unnamed)

Part 1 of 2

Rating: Explicit (Smut)

Key Tags: breeding kink, pregnancy kink, body worship, light dom/sub, light bondage, light praise kink, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it dacryphilia, cunnilingus, PIV, Astarion’s past trauma, smut with so many feelings but nearly no plot, character introspection

Summary:

Tav saw beauty in Astarion he couldn’t have seen himself, even if he had a reflection to gawk at. She made love with a man who never thought he could have anything near it. Made all his red dreams come true, and then said: go on, make new ones, in whatever color you like. Astarion never thought about being a father. Not before her. Or: an angsty-turned-horny character study about the pale elf and his thoughts on creating new (un)life.

A/N: This is my first stab at writing a more generic Tav. Tav in this piece is AFAB and uses she/her pronouns. Most other identifying features are left out.

Click here to read on AO3 instead

Astarion’s never thought much about making another vampire.

In the rare moments the notion occurred to him, he shoved it to the far back shelf of his mind so as not to waste himself on an exercise in futility. What did it matter, after all, while Cazador still lorded over him?

More than anything, Astarion yearned to see Cazador’s blood spill. In his mind’s eye, he’d watch it pool across the floor, not unlike the way he'd seen so much clothing puddled at so many heels. The lake he’d make of his master would be wide enough to swallow the garments of all who’d stripped bare before Astarion. Every sweat-soaked night he found himself bound to another moldering mattress beneath someone else’s weight, rocking through the motions that left his stomach sour, he’d fill his mind with such sweet dreams as Cazador’s death.

Whether Cazador would allow Astarion to drink his blood before being relieved of it varied with the fantasy. The dream changed as often as the hands on Astarion’s hips. It mattered little to him whether Cazador’s end came with true vampirism or not. As long as he ended.

As long as the vile river of shit that comprised Astarion’s life ended, one way or another. For better. Or for good.

Of course, he flirted with the fantasy of his own spawn, sent out like skittering spiders to dispense his will. Foul little monsters they would be. Fine tools to have in his arsenal; Astarion would only want such wretches of his own the way one might want a hammer to pound a nail. And what he wanted didn’t hold any weight while bound in Cazador’s chains.

So the idea recoiled into the dusty recesses of his mind, collecting cobwebs kitty-corner to such out of reach trophies as freedom from his servitude to Cazador and the sun itself. Both still gleamed, despite the tarnish of time and hope rusted over. Despite Astarion’s prayers, no heroes came to save him. No gods or slayers or saviors spared him from his servitude.

Until the illithids did.

Despite everything -- the centuries of torment, the hollow where his heart should be, its silence in his ribcage, the scars on his back, the thousands of other lashes that Cazador let fade from his porcelain skin -- Astarion did the one thing Cazador could never.

He stood in the sun. And on the sands of that same beach, another miracle washed ashore. A contradiction. His counterweight to everything else he’d ever known.

Tav.

Astarion’s hands roam the supple shape of her nestled against his bare chest. Her breath crests and falls soft and rhythmic, like the gentle slap of waves against the cliffs where they first found each other. His darling is always so serene in her sleep. Astarion dips his head down, nosing her splayed hair on the pillow, drinking in the lovely scent of lavender that always lingers with his lover.

Often, he wakes before her, as he does now in the dim blue light of dusk. Not yet dark enough for him to step outside, but for the moment, there’s nowhere in the world he’d rather be. Not even in the raw, rippling light of day.

The smell of her has his eyelids heavy again, the steady patter of her heartbeat hypnotic in his head. His hands curve over the flare of her hips before slipping beneath the hem of her tunic. He stifles the satisfied hum that bubbles in the back of his throat as his palm smooths down the lithe stretch of her stomach. He resettles with his nose in the crook of her neck, eyelashes grazing the twin puncture scars that mark her as his.

He’d thought, once, that he’d ascend and have her at his side for an eternity. He was scared. Frantic. Grasping. He thought he had to grasp at something, fashion some sort of tether, to have her. Thought he had to have power, and enough of it, to keep her. Now he holds her every morning in the bed they share, until day becomes night again. It’s as effortless as blinking.

Now, the thought of turning Tav into a vampire turns his stomach.

His lips brush, tender, to the flutter of her pulse in her neck. He loves those marks he gave her. He loves the way her fingertips tap against them when she’s lost in thought. He loves the way she arches into his arms as he feeds, the way her body gives and gives to him alone. That sleepy, slap-happy smile she has when he’s lapped his last for the evening. The way her eyes roll back, and she gasps, breathless, as he kisses a trail from her neck to a nipple and sucks fervently.

He loves that he’s marked her, but that it didn’t change her. He can still curl into the heat of her skin at night. Still watch her preen in a mirror. Still stare at those gorgeous eyes and know the shade of them is hers. Her cheeks still turn the shade of sunrise when he leans in with a lustful whisper, or grazes her waist with a feather-light touch.

Absently, his fingers follow the path of an old scar on her stomach. At its end, he finds the start of softness. Astarion loves that, too. She didn’t used to be soft there, when they were just surviving. They’re not just surviving anymore.

Perhaps he’s changed her after all. It’s not so scary anymore to admit she’s turned him, too. Not to the light, or anything so nauseatingly righteous. But rather, so Astarion could see himself in it. Even if his days of standing in the sun are done.

I’ll be your mirror, she vowed, what feels like another lifetime ago. She smiled in that fond way of hers that, at the time, hurt to look at too long. He scoffed at her poetic ruminations on his hair curling near his ears. The creases when he laughs.

Tav saw beauty in him he couldn’t have seen himself, even if he had a reflection to gawk at. She made love with a man who never thought he could have anything near it. Made all his red dreams come true, and then said: go on, make new ones, in whatever color you like.

Astarion never thought about being a father. Not before her.

He’s thought of Tav as a mother before. It flitted through his mind when Astarion watched her ease Arabella’s pounding heart with the gentleness of her own. That feeling lingered when Yenna joined their camp, and Astarion caught Tav teaching her cards. Combing the snarls from the girl’s hair. Coaching her in the basics of swordplay.

She’d be a wonderful mother. Astarion has no doubts in that regard. And he, well…

He doesn’t have an example to look back on, or one to look up to. But he has his compass. Tav’s heart beats, sure and steady, in his ear. That sound’s guided him through so much else. How could he lose his way for long, if there were two pitter-patters to listen to?

His palm paints cool over that blooming softness in her stomach. An ache burns in his own. The sort of hunger her blood won’t sate. Would she taste even sweeter, he wonders, with her body rounded and swollen?

Of course she would. So hard to improve something so perfect already. But she’d be radiant, if she were ripe with their child.

And after, when their babe is born, and her body is new all over again, he'd love every line, every fold, every mark that came from their coupling. He’d worship every part of her that was remade by the two of them to make the three of them. Marvel at the way the same body that first truly fed him would feed their child, too.

He’d help her find her way back to pleasure in her own way, in her own time. Just as she did for him. His Tav gives, and gives, and he’d give her anything, everything, for the rest of his days, if a wretch like him would be so stupidly blessed to be the father of her child.

Astarion pulls a breath between his teeth, his nose flooding with her floral scent again. That would change, too. She’d carry new notes in her sweat, in her slick, in her blood, while carrying their babe. Astarion wants to taste them all, to learn what songs she can sing while he does.

Instinctually, he presses to the plump of her ass to soothe the building stiffness in his cock. He plants a muted hum in the fabric of the pillow. His groin throbs to the thump-thump of his compass, beating oblivious beneath her ribs.

He pictures pouring into her, night after night, his spend spilling in little translucent rivers down her slicked thighs, overflowing from her cunt. Too much for her to hold in, but she’d take him as long as it takes until life sparks inside of her. Tav’s determined in all her undertakings. Resilient.

And in his dreams, she’s pliant. Pleading.

“Star, please.”

She’s trembling in that slinky, translucent nightgown she wears to bed sometimes. The one that hardly hides her skin, but cloaks it in a delectable, silvery sheen. He likes it too much to ruin it. Or at least, he has every other night.

Oh, he’d like to ruin it, now.

Tav’s pupils are blown black with want. Sweat shimmers on her skin, spurring his tongue to swipe his own lips. Her shoulder peeks bare from her nightgown, and Astarion can see her pebbled nipples, dark beneath the sheer silk that separates them. Hardened with hardly a touch. A feeling he’s intimately familiar with. His cock twitches as he strokes the back of his hand over the soft swell of her breast.

“Aren’t you sore, sweet thing?” He tries for tender, but it comes out coarse. Rough like the way he wants to grip her hips.

“So be gentle,” she says with a sultry smile, lips peeled apart and glistening just enough that Astarion can’t peel his eyes away. “I know you’ll take good care of me.”

Astarion slinks forward, crowding her against the edge of the bed. Careful, like cradling glass, his palm reaches out to cup the side of her cheek. She sighs into the touch, the curve of her smile reaching the heel of his hand.

“Always,” he says reverently, before his voice sinks to a growl. “You’re always so, so eager…for me.”

Her lashes flutter low over hungry eyes. All it takes is one little wordless bob of her head for Astarion’s own hunger to have the best of him. With a lazy roll of his wrists, he shoves her back with kind but firm force. The mattress bends with her impact, her breathless laughter nearly lost beneath the whine of the wooden frame. Astarion crawls after her, hands fisting in her nightgown, and pulling her free of it.

And then, she’s bare beneath him. Writhing from his tongue and teeth. Gasping out the best words he’s ever heard. Astarion downs them like a man starved, kissing her with the kind of fervor he thought reserved for bloodlust. But her lips, the promises they pour, are sustenance all on their own.

“I’m yours,” she whispers, “all yours. Always. All of me.”

Astarion can’t stifle the whine that drags from some hollow in his chest he never knew about before.

The bed creaks as he hitches one of Tav’s limber legs up over his shoulder and nips a path of sharp kisses from her ankle to the crux of her thigh. He pauses, sweeping a feverish gaze over the spread of her: legs parted in his grip, that perfect slit, already wet with want, the rest of her sprawled naked across the bed, at his mercy, at his desire, at her own.

He leans down, tongue dipping leisurely through her cunt. Always, she swore. So there’s no hurry in how he takes apart the woman he loves so dearly, in one of her favorite ways to be unmade. No matter how many times she claws the sheets and hisses, “Please, Star. F-fuck, I need you inside of me.”

It turns something in the depths of him to hear his own name said as a prayer. It makes him want with a force and harshness stronger than any thirst he’s felt for blood. He wants to turn her. Change her. Forever, for good. For the life they could make from their bodies, bound as close as souls could be. He wants to see her swell with the love they make, with all the love he’ll leave inside her.

She’s so close, her legs quaking violently when her hand tangles his hair and yanks his head upright. She’s beautiful, flushed ruby red, taking her air in shallow doses. Her eyes burn with equal measures adoration and reproach.

Astarion smirks, unrepentant, lips smeared with devotion. “My love, any work of art takes time. And that’s what we’re making, you know. When others look upon our progeny, they will weep in the sight of such beauty.”

“If all it takes is time, dearest,” she says, with a smile just as filthy, “then I don’t want to waste one second of it lying here empty.”

“Mmm,” Astarion sighs, nosing down against her throbbing clit, eyes flashing back to hers as he dares another lick. Her fist tightens in his hair. Astarion only chuckles.

“You’re right, of course,” he croons. “That won’t do, at all. I do recall promising to-- how did you put it the other night? ‘Fuck you full and senseless’? I’m more partial to what you begged me for a tenday ago, when I had you face-down and waiting for me as soon as the sun was set. Remind me again, my love, what you said when you weren't gasping my name?"

Astarion presses the tip of his tongue to her clit again and tastes her rapid, ravenous pulse in the heat of it. Tav’s hips jerk in response, but he holds her fast.

“I-I said I want-- that I want--”

“You want me to ‘breed you like a damn animal’," he finishes for her. "Oh, don’t be shy now, my sweet. We’re far past that. And we want the same things, after all. But," he sighs, letting his lips drag through her flushed folds, "I've another promise to keep, first.”

Astarion flicks his wrist, muttering magic beneath his breath. Tav’s sharp little yelp of surprise shoots heat straight to his groin. His cock throbs as she settles again, arms bound above her head by his mage hand, tits bouncing from the slightest struggle against her restraints. She smirks up at him, eyes aflame with fresh desire. Escape is the farthest thing from what she wants.

“You lie back now, dear,” Astarion drawls. “You’ll take me soon enough. You’ll be so good for me, like you always are, and take everything I give you. And I’ll take very, very good care of the woman I intend to make a mother.”

Astarion watches her keenly, tracing his forefinger down through her slick. He unfurls it, circling her cunt daintily, and watching her writhe for even the faintest promise of friction. He’s not sure if it’s his mercy or his selfishness that readily discards the thought of keeping her here, just like this, for the rest of the day. She’s mesmerizing, with the way her back arches from the blankets, and how her body strains towards any touch he’ll spare her.

All mine, he thinks, with a smile that makes him feel weightless. He grounds his hardened cock against the edge of the bed, groaning. All yours, darling. Just for you.

Pride rumbles low in his chest as he sets his mouth back to work again and knows she can’t cover her own. There’s no muffling his name pouring from her lips. No hiding how she cries for him. Her whole body winds taut, shuddering with every stroke of his tongue.

Finally, finally, he lets his finger slip inside her. Astarion sighs into a satisfied purr, letting the tremble of it soak into her sex. Her cunt’s a vice around his knuckle. Every pump of his finger feeds the building burn inside him, fanning the ache to be sheathed in that tightness. He only aches more, feeling her squeeze around his finger, and knowing she longs for him just the same.

He slips in a second finger to join the first, feeling her spread and then clench anew. Astarion ruts aimlessly into the mattress, in time with the thrust of his wrist. The head of his cock weeps anticipation with the rogue tear trailing down the side of her cheek. It’s only pleasure that makes her cry.

There’s only love in her heavy-lidded gaze as she pants, “Please.”

Mercy, then, Astarion resolves. For both of them.

Her thighs quiver against his ears like leaves in a breeze. Astarion swirls his tongue against the bud of her clit and sucks tightly. Tav stiffens abruptly. His arms hook firm around her legs as a shattered sound breaks from her throat,and a hard tremor courses through her hips.

He holds her through it, pinning her to the bed until just the faintest brush of his lips has her shuddering. The start of her plaintive whimper has him easing back. A murmured word sets her wrists free of her restraints. Her heart still hammers, sumptuous, in his head, as he peppers her legs in kisses soft as velvet.

“Beautiful,” he whispers with each one, slinking up her body while she comes back down. “So, so beautiful.”

He thinks of new life, as his knee bends between her thighs and drags her open all over again. He thinks of the graveyard, where he had her freely beneath the stars, in the dirt where he woke centuries ago. He thinks he’d be happy to die again, this way, as he slides forward and buries himself inside her waiting heat.

Astarion grates out a long, low moan as he basks in the wrap of her arms and her cunt. Dimly, he feels her fingertips threading gently through his curls. He thinks of sunlight on his skin again as he sinks in fully, bracing his arms on either side of her head, letting his forehead tilt against hers. He can feel her pulse thrumming through her body, through his cock, through his fogged-over thoughts. His hips roll to the sound, as if it beckoned him to motion. Tav’s head drops back into the pillows. She lets out a long, contented hum, while her body rocks in time with his.

“Is this what you needed, darling?” He huffs a laugh, catching her lips in chaste kiss. It’s enough for her to taste her own sweetness. And one squeeze from her cunt is enough to cut his breath away all over again.

“I think you needed me, too,” she purrs.

“Y-yes,” he stammers through bared teeth, his throat tied taut as she wrings him for all he’s worth. “Yes.”

She knows exactly what he needs, what he yearns for. He needs her, needs this, needs to see his seed seeping from her fucked-out hole, pink and puffy and leaking. He’ll know the rest of it was spent so deep inside her, her fertile womb is flooded. That’s his, too, with the rest of her.

Hips high for me, beautiful, he’ll say, when his last thrust is done. And he’ll hold her legs up against his shoulders, kiss her heels, and slip the pillow beneath her pelvis. Just to be sure it takes.

It’ll be another couple months before they’ll start to see the fruit of their efforts. Until Tav starts to bloom with it. And then, he’ll be hard pressed not to have his hands on her every hour. Cupping the fresh heft of her breasts as they grow with the passing days, heavy from him, for the babe growing in her belly. He’ll soothe her weepy eyes and tits alike, with a skilled tongue and sweet whisper. Rub her shoulders to ease the new weight her bones carry. Draw his nose down her neck and smell not just her, but himself, and the consequences of what they did, right here in this bed.

Feel her change beneath his hands and feel so fucking proud to be the reason.

Pleasure winds, binding, around his cock, and he feels that hunger snap its jaws around him all over again. His hips snap with it, jerking frantically. I need you, all of you, he thinks, and if he weren’t already fucking her, he’d be on his knees, begging for all he’s worth. Her cunt quivers, and he’s lost to the grip of her. Astarion shoves his own knuckles in his mouth to stifle a strangled cry.

“Star?”

Astarion rips awake in a sweat. He sees familiar wooden beams above his head, above his bed. Sunlight streaks the floorboards, leaking from behind the curtains. Turning his cheek, he finds his lover peering at him from over her shoulder, concern wrinkling her face. Tav still lays on her side, and Astarion still presses against her back. But his hand clamps tight to her thigh, bare where he hiked up her tunic. And his cock twitches fitfully against her ass, unspent and painfully hard.

Just a dream, then. For now, at least.

He lets out a long, weary sigh, slumping back into the sheets. Tav tilts her head, the worry in her gaze gradually dissolving into a mischievous gleam.

“I thought you might--” she starts, snickering, “but you were having sweet dreams, weren’t you?”

“The best I’ve ever had,” Astarion mutters mournfully as he buries his face in his pillow. “You were there, of course.”

Astarion rarely sleeps anymore. It’s not normal, not natural for an elf. But it was a trick he taught to dodge Cazador’s torment at least for a few hours a day. Reverie used to mean putting the horrors on repeat. He’d slowly eased from the habit, now that he has new memories worth seeing a second, third, or hundredth time.

Still, occasionally, he drifts to sleep without meaning to. Sometimes, he wanders off into novel nightmares. Or, if he’s lucky, he dreams of making love to his wife and making her pregnant. Of making their own little dhampir.

His hips shift, and he hisses. Pre-cum seeps from the head of his cock, slickening the shaft. It’s not enough. Not after such a succulent fantasy. But one touch from his darling might have him sated, if not entirely satisfied. Pleasure stabs, sharp, through his groin as she shifts and brushes him with her motion. He grimaces.

Just one touch alone could do it.

“I’m here now,” she smirks, twisting to face him. Her hand slips down between them. Mercy, he thinks, as her fingers wrap his length. He thrusts into her palm with a pleading whimper. “Tell me all about these dreams of yours.”

A/N: If you're yelling "Let him breed!!" at the screen just know I'm right there with you holding a megaphone about it 💜

If there's interest (from others & myself) perhaps there might be a part two where Tav takes matters into her own hands. Makes him say exactly what he wants, if he wants to have it so bad 👀

EDIT: This is now officially a part one of two 😉

If you'd like me to add you to a tag list for future one-shots, or all of my future BG3 fic (including multi-chapters), leave me a comment and let me know which you'd like!

& HUGE thank you to some lovely Discord and Tumblr friends/moots who cheered me on as I worked on this one! 💜

Tag List: @wilteddreamsofbaldursgate

#astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion smut #tavstarion #astarion x tav #tav x astarion #astarion breeding #bg3 #bg3 fanfic #astarion fanfic #astarion x f!tav #f!tav x astarion #my writing #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate #divider credit: firefly-graphics #end banner credit: cafekitsune

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dreamiiee · 2 months

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have you ever sat and thought about your favorite traits of your f/o… what do you like about them?

do you like their eyes, how gentle they soften and sweet they crinkle as they gaze at you lovingly? how do their hands feel intertwined with yours, are they’re big, small, rough and calloused? maybe soft and well moisturized? what about their smile…. is it cheery and gummy, maybe they have a tooth gap, missing teeth, are they yellowed? maybe they find it hard to smile at all, can only bare a curl of the lip? maybe they don’t have lips at all, what do they do to let you know they’re happy around you! do they beep, purr, warm up? what do you find so precious about them!!

think of yourself in their eyes too, what do they like about you!! do they like how your hand feels in theirs, how warm - maybe cool- you are? how joyful and striking your giggle is? maybe you have a hard time sitting still or moving around, they admire the space you take. there will always be something they love about you in the same way you love them. let yourself think of those things that they love about you! 🌼

#writings! 🌼#self ship #romantic self ship #self ship imagines #self ship prompts #f/o imagines #f/o prompts #dividers by saradika graphics!!

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389 · 13 days

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Totally F***ed Up Gregg Araki

#movies #cinema #films #gregg arraki #totally f***ed up #poster #poster art #poster design #graphic design #u

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wigglebox · 1 month

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Destiel Hot Summer - Hot ☀️

#hotsummerart #destiel #Destiel art #dean Winchester #castiel #wiggleart #spnfanart #it’s never too hot for a ride! 😎#august makes my brain unhinged #also pls try not to tag this n-s-f you know what because I’m fearful tumblr will hide it #I made it not so graphic specifically for this

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velaazuretail · 2 months

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Hi (●’◡’●)ﾉ

I'm not sure if you do multiple characters for one request so if you don't you can just pick one. Please can I request a Reader x some genshin men (Childe, Kaeya, Itto) where the Reader is emotionally fragile but holding it together but one day they finally break down and the characters come home to find the Reader sobbing or something.

Req’s OPEN! | | Breaking the silence.

﹒ ∬ ﹒☕️ ﹒ GENSHIN X READER | Fluff |

⌣ ﹒ ✿ ﹕Kaeya, Childe & Itto

﹕note : I still do graphics but for now I’m writing.. so sorry if it’s not good, it’s my first time 💔 please do send tips! ^^

✦ ﹒ ┈ ﹕KAEYA ❄️

The days had been long and heavy, each one blending into the next. You had been holding it together, putting on a brave face for everyone around you. But inside, the weight of your emotions was becoming unbearable. You felt like a fragile glass, one small crack away from shattering completely.

Kaeya had been your rock, always there with a comforting smile and a reassuring word. But today, he was out on a mission, and you were left alone with your thoughts. The silence of the house seemed to amplify your feelings, and you found yourself struggling to keep the tears at bay.

As the sun began to set, casting long shadows across the room, you finally broke down. The sobs came in waves, each one more intense than the last. You curled up on the couch, hugging a pillow to your chest, as the tears flowed freely.

. . .

Kaeya was exhausted. He had just returned from a long and grueling mission, and all he wanted was a hot shower and a good night's sleep. As he walked into his home, he could sense that something was off. There was an odd energy in the air, a feeling of heaviness.

As he made his way through the house, he heard a faint sound coming from the living room. He approached cautiously and peeked into the room. What he saw made his heart drop.

You were sitting on the couch, your body shaking with sobs. Your shoulders heaved with each wave of emotion, and your eyes were red and puffy. You looked small and vulnerable, a stark contrast to your usual strong and steady demeanor.

Without a moment's hesitation, Kaeya rushed over to your side. He sat down beside you and pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly against his chest.

You clung to Kaeya like a lifeline, the sobs still wracking your body. You buried your face against his chest, your tears staining his shirt. You had tried so hard to keep it together, to be strong and unshakeable, but in that moment, all you wanted was to let go, to let someone else take on the weight for a while.

Kaeya held you tighter, his arms strong and comforting around you. He could feel the tremors going through your body and the hot tears on his skin. He didn't say anything, just stroked your back and held you close.

You looked up at him, your eyes red and puffy from crying. “I… I can’t do this anymore,” you managed to say between sobs. “It’s too much.”

Kaeya's expression softened as he looked down at you, his heart breaking at the sight of your tears and the pain in your voice.

"I know," he said softly, rubbing your back in soothing circles. "I know it's too much, but you don't have to do it alone. I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you."

He paused for a moment, his gaze steady and compassionate.

"Just let it all out. I'm not going anywhere."

You leaned into him, finding comfort in his steady presence. Your body continued to shake with sobs, the weight of your emotions finally becoming too much to hold back. Kaeya held you tighter, his arms strong and protective around you.

After a few moments, your sobs started to subside, replaced by the occasional hiccup and shaky breaths. You looked up at Kaeya again, your eyes rimmed red and swollen.

"I'm sorry," you whispered, your voice shaky. "I didn't mean to fall apart like this."

Kaeya shook his head, his expression gentle but firm.

"Don't apologize," he said firmly. "You have nothing to apologize for. This is just a release. You've been holding everything in for far too long. It was bound to come out sooner or later. And I'm glad you let it out with me."

He reached up and brushed a strand of hair out of your face, his touch tender and carefulla. "It's okay to not be okay, y'know?"

You nodded, your eyes still watery with tears. His words soothed the aching in your chest, and you leaned further into him, finding comfort in the steady beat of his heart.

"I don't know why I can't keep it together," you mumbled, your voice hoarse from crying. "I thought I was stronger than this."

Kaeya squeezed you gently, his arms still wrapped around you. "Strength isn't about never breaking down," he said softly. "It's about picking yourself up and facing your emotions, no matter how tough they are."

He leaned his head against yours, his cheek against your hair. "You're one of the strongest people I know. You've been through so much, and you're still standing. It's okay to break down sometimes. It doesn't make you weak. It makes you human."

You let out a shaky breath, his words sinking in. You had been running yourself ragged trying to be strong, to appear impenetrable. But maybe he was right. Maybe it was okay to let yourself feel weak sometimes.

You closed your eyes, exhaustion finally settling in. "I just feel so tired," you murmured. "Like the weight of everything is too much to carry."

Kaeya nodded, understanding and empathetic.

"That's only natural," he said quietly. "It's exhausting, carrying such a heavy load. You've been through a lot. You need time to rest and regroup."

He pulled you closer, adjusting his position so you were more comfortable. "Close your eyes," he said. "Just rest for a bit. I'll stay right here, if you want me to."

✦ ﹒ ┈ ﹕CHILDE 🌊

The days had been long and heavy, each one blending into the next. You had been holding it together, putting on a brave face for everyone around you.

But inside, the weight of your emotions was becoming too much to bear. You were emotionally fragile, yet determined to keep going, hoping that things would get better.

One evening, after a particularly tough day, you found yourself alone at home. The silence was deafening, and the walls seemed to close in on you. You tried to distract yourself, but the overwhelming feelings you had been suppressing for so long finally broke free. Tears began to stream down your face, and before you knew it, you were sobbing uncontrollably.

. . .

Childe had promised to come home early, but a few work-related emergencies had kept him from meeting that goal. When he finally stumbled through the door hours later, he instantly knew that something was off. The house seemed too quiet, and the uneasy feeling in his gut grew stronger with each step.

He heard the sound of soft sobs coming from the living room and followed the sound, his heart quickening.

He found you curled up on the couch, your body shaking with silent sobs. Your face was buried in your hands, and the weight of despair was palpable in the air.

He stood frozen in the doorway for a moment, his heart breaking at the sight of you in such a state. He had seen you strong and resilient, but this vulnerability was a new and painful sight.

He crossed the room quickly, sinking down beside you on the couch. He didn't say anything at first, just wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into his lap. You leaned into him, your body still wracked with sobs, and clutched at his shirt, seeking comfort.

Childe held you close, his arms tight around you. He stroked your hair, whispering soothing words in your ear as he tried to comfort you.

"It's okay," he murmured. "You can let it out. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

Your tears continued to fall, hot and plentiful, leaving damp splotches on his shirt. The sobs shook your body, and you clutched at him like a lifeline, desperate for the grounding touch he offered.

He didn't try to stop your tears or tell you to pull yourself together. Instead, he held you, letting you release the emotions that had been boiling inside you.

He kissed the top of your head, his voice gentle. "Let it out. Don't bottle it up."

You continued to cling to him, your sobs gradually subsiding as the storm of your emotions began to lessen. Your breathing slowed, and the tremors that rocked your body subsided.

Childe just held you, his hands rubbing small circles on your back, providing a steady and reassuring presence.

Once your sobs had quieted, he gently tilted your chin up so you were looking at him. His eyes were filled with concern and compassion, his own expression reflecting the worry he felt.

"Can you talk to me?" he asked softly. "Tell me what happened. Is there something bothering you?"

Your voice was shaky and hoarse from crying, but you managed to croak out a few words. "It's... It's everything," you managed to say, your voice cracking. "Everything's just... it's too much sometimes, you know?"

Childe's expression softened. He had seen you struggle before, but this was different. It was like a dam had broken, and everything you had been holding back was finally coming to the surface.

He cupped your face with his hand, gently wiping away the tears with his thumb. "I know it's hard," he said gently. "But you're not alone in this. I'm here for you. We'll figure it out together."

You leaned into his touch, your eyes closed as you took comfort in his steadiness. His presence was reassuring, a safe haven in the midst of the emotional whirlwind you were experiencing.

"I just feel so... overwhelmed," you murmured, your voice trembling slightly. "Like I'm drowning in emotions. I can't seem to keep myself together anymore."

Childe nodded, his hand still gently stroking your cheek. "You've been carrying this weight for a long time, haven't you?" he said quietly.

His eyes searched yours, understanding and compassion clear on his face. "You've been so strong, holding everything together for so long. It's okay to break sometimes."

You nodded, his words striking a chord within you. You had been pushing yourself too hard, trying to be strong for everyone else's benefit. But the weight was becoming too heavy, and you couldn't carry it alone anymore.

"I... I just feel so lost," you admitted, your voice shaky. "Like I'm floundering, trying to keep my head above water. I don't know how much more I can take."

Childe's arms tightened around you, pulling you closer to him. "You don't have to do it alone, " he said firmly. "You never have to do it alone. We'll figure it out together, okay? You're not in this alone."

You buried your face against his chest, your tears starting to flow again. But this time, they felt different - they weren't as heavy, as desperate. It was as if his words, his presence, were chipping away at the overwhelming emotions.

"Thank you," you whispered, your voice muffled against his shirt. "I don't know what I did to deserve you."

✦ ﹒ ┈ ﹕ITTO 💥

In the quiet town of Inazuma, you had always been the pillar of strength, holding everything together despite the emotional storms raging inside. Each day was a battle, but you managed to keep a brave face, not wanting to burden anyone with your struggles.

Your boyfriend, Itto, with his boisterous personality and childlike enthusiasm, was often your source of light in the darkness..

One evening, after a particularly tough day, you found yourself on the edge. The weight of your emotions became too much to bear, and the dam you had built to hold back your tears finally broke. You collapsed onto the floor, sobbing uncontrollably, the sound of your cries echoing through the empty house.

. . .

Itto, who had been out on one of his usual adventures, burst through the door with a triumphant grin, holding a large, colorful bug he had found. “Look what I got!” he exclaimed, his voice full of excitement. But his joy quickly turned to concern when he saw you on the floor, tears streaming down your face.

He dropped the bug in surprise, the creature skittering away as Itto rushed over to you, his loud footsteps clattering on the floor.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, his usual cheerful voice edged with worry. He dropped to his knees beside you, his hands hovering uncertainly as he tried to work out what to do.

You couldn't respond, your words choked up by the tears and the wave of emotions that was washing over you. All you could manage was a shaky gasp as you continued to sob, your body wracked with the force of your emotions.

Itto pulled you into his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around you, trying to offer whatever comfort he could.

"Hey, hey," he murmured, his voice filled with worry. "You're scaring me, y/n. Just tell me what's wrong. Let me help."

But you couldn't speak, the emotions still choking you. All you could do was grip onto him tightly, your fingers clenching at his clothes as if he was your lifeline. Your body shook with uncontrollable sobs, the tears flowing like a waterfall, soaking his shirt.

Your sobs slowly quieted, your body shuddering with the aftershocks of your emotional breakdown. You leaned heavily against Itto, feeling exhausted and vulnerable.

His shirt was damp from your tears, but he didn't seem to care. He just held you, his strong arms a comforting presence.

As your cries lessened, he gently pulled away, his eyes searching your face. "Can you talk to me now?" he asked softly. His hands were still rubbing gentle circles on your back, grounding you in the moment.

With a shaky sigh, you managed to nod. Your voice was hoarse and thick with tears. "I just... I just needed to let it out," you whispered, your voice cracking. "It's been too much for so long, and it just... it just all came out."

Itto's expression softened, a mix of relief and sympathy in his eyes. He reached out and gently brushed a strand of hair away from your face. "Why didn't you tell me it was getting this bad?" he asked quietly.

You looked away, shame and guilt coursing through you. "I... I didn't want to worry you," you mumbled. "You've always looked up to me as this strong, unflappable person. I didn't want to disappoint you by showing you how weak I really am."

Itto's eyebrows furrowed in frustration. "You're not weak," he protested, his voice firm. "You're just... you're human. We all get overwhelmed sometimes, and you just needed to let it out. You shouldn't feel ashamed for having feelings. I don't expect you to be strong all the time, y/n. I just want you to be honest with me. Share the burden with me."

Your throat tightened as his words hit you. You had been so afraid of disappointing him, of losing his unwavering faith in you. But now, hearing him say that he didn't expect you to be strong all the time, it was like a huge weight lifted off your shoulders.

"I... I'm sorry," you whispered, your voice still shaky. "I thought... I thought if I showed weakness, you'd... you'd think less of me."

Itto pulled you closer against him, his arms encircling you in a tight embrace. "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard," he said gruffly, but there was no anger in his voice. "I could never think less of you for showing your true feelings. I love you, y/n. Weaknesses and all."

The last of your defenses shattered at his words, your shoulders shaking with a mixture of tears and laughter. "You're such an idiot," you choked out between sobs. "But I... I love you too. Even though you're dumb and loud and annoying."

Itto let out a noisy guffaw, his chest rumbling with laughter. "Hey, I can be smart and quiet and pleasant when I want to be," he protested, a grin on his face. "I just prefer to be my loud, obnoxious self. It's who I am, take it or leave it."

#dividers #tumblr layouts #banners #rentry recourses #rentry graphics #carrd resources #honkai star rail #genshin impact #hsr #hoyoverse #genshin x reader #itto x reader #childe x reader #kaeya x reader #genshin x f!reader #genshin x m!reader #genshin x male reader #genshin x female reader #.°˖✧ ꒰ MY WRITING ꒱ ⊹₊ ✰ ⋆

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baldursgate3tempobsessed · 1 year

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Hihi! I went on anon cause my main blog is strictly sfw, but I promise I'm an adult(29). Anyways, I had this idea of Ascended Astarion teasing Tav/Reader in front of a mirror. He can't see himself, but loves the way Tav/Reader shudders under his touch and them getting more and more embarrassed because all they can see is themselves getting riled up by seemingly nothing, but when they look down, ofc they see his hands working magic across their body.

Lol ty for the clarification and ask! I've been needing some nsfw practice!

Ascended Astarion nsfw under the cut, 18 + warnings. Like this is not implied smut. It is smut, graphic. Possessive, obsessive, manipulative, bad vampire man who loves you. As much as he's capable of. Morally gray human Tav from the start to here. It's only downhill from here baby, m/f angle. But if that doesnt fufill the dream let me know and I can make a gender neutral/ gender nonspecfic no prob! And probably less intense too because this is angsty~~~

Like I went ham, this is a whole ass fic now💀

You frowned at yourself in the bedroom mirror, adjusting your hair for the umpteenth time. It still didn't look right, despite what felt like hours of practice that you'd put into the intricate style.

You sighed as let one of your braids fall down, dissatisfied with what you saw. You didn't exactly look the part of an all-powerful vampire's consort, or at least not with the company you've recently been keeping. But it turned out a significant part of taking over Baldur's Gate was trenched in politics, meetings, balls, social events created for the sole purpose of mind games.

It was exhausting, or at least it was for you. But Astarion seemed to take to it like a duck to water. This life suited him, one of power games and subterfuge, and more often than not, murder. Not that you minded. You were just happy that he was having fun. That he was finally free after all of those years of torment. Even if he was using that freedom for… less than savory ends.

But despite his goals, you had sworn to him that you would never stray. And you intended on making good on that promise.

You just wished that he didn't insist on you being there for all of his "business". You hadn't realized how literal he had been about the whole sitting in his lap plan. It had taken a half-hour conversation to even convince him that no, you would not be doing so in the nude. He still hadn't given up on convincing you off that plan, but you highly doubted that it would help with your current level of heightened insecurity.

Maybe you were worrying for no reason. It wasn't Astarion who made you feel out of place. Well… it was, but not because of anything he did. Just… who he had become. He was so different now, so much colder to everything and everyone but you. More calculating, less forgiving, and just perfect for working with the most dangerous individuals in the mortal plane.

You seemed to be the only living thing he could relax around anymore, the only person who could soften him. It was strange really. You used to remember his softer side, before the ritual. The way his heart would hurt for children and animals alike, despite his failed attempts to hide it. His soft spot for Karlach, those who were brave and brazen, always willing to do the right thing despite the risks. The kind smile he used to have, reserved for beautiful things like the sunrise, the sunset.

Gone, all of it. It was a fact that you didn't like to think about. What you both gave up, things could have been; there was no point to it anyway. It was over. You gave Astarion the choice, this is what came of that. So here you were, obsessing over your appearance in preparation for a meeting with a high-ranking devil.

How things had changed.

You had no idea if you would ever find a way to match up with the company he kept around these days. Maybe it was your own fault for surrounding yourself with otherworldly creatures, but it was hard not to feel inadequate.

It didn't help that whenever you even slightly alluded to that insecurity, Astarion was more than ready to remind you of your… "options".

"You can join us whenever you'd like my treasure," Astarion would say with a creeping grin, "Just one bite, and we can be sure you'll be mine forever. Would that be so bad?"

It was a tempting offer, one that you kept insisting on refusing. You loved Astarion more than anything. But… you wanted that love to stay your choice. An obligation you maintained of your own free will. It's not that you didn't trust him… but to be a spawn had too many implications for you to handle.

"What has you pouting sweet thing?"

You startled when hands suddenly settled on your hip, gripping through the thin fabric of your nightdress. You looked back, relaxing the slightest bit to see Astarion smiling down at you, amused at the fact he'd managed to sneak up on you through the mirror.

"You said you weren't going to do that anymore," You whined as you leaned back into him, your eyes turning back to the mirror. You could see the fabric of your slip indented under his hands, ghost-like without his actual image reflecting back.

"I lied," Astarion said simply, leaning down to breathe you in from the crook of your neck, "Now what are you thinking about pet? I can tell something's on your mind."

You bit your lip, debating for a moment if you should tell him or not. But it's not like he would let it drop, and he was way too good at being able to tell when you were lying. Might as well come clean.

You sighed, "I don't…I don't know if I'm cut out for this."

You expected him to huff at you, maybe even laugh. But instead, the grip he had on you tightened, hard enough to make you gasp. You could feel his fangs scraping against your delicate skin, scratching hard enough to cause pinpricks of blood to bead out.

"And why would you ever think a thing like that?" Astarion asked, his voice harsh and low, "Where else would you be if not by my side hm? Please, enlighten me."

You gulped, your heart rate starting to pick up. You hadn't meant it like that, "That's not what I meant-"

"Then what else could it have meant?" Astarion shot back, his hands digging into you, surely ready to leave finger-shaped bruises. Suddenly he was using that same grip to drag you backward to the bed, effortlessly settling you between his spread legs.

All while managing to still be right in sight of the mirror. You could feel your cheeks redden as his hands started to wander, unceremoniously tugging down the straps of your nightdress to reveal your chest. That was another thing about life after the ritual that had been a surprise, just how different Astarion's sex drive was. It's not like he was a prude before, far from it, but now he was insatiable. Always ready and willing to touch you whenever the urge struck him. Often enough for you to eventually come to the thrilling, if not slightly disturbed realization, that… he was training you. Training your body to always want his touch.

And tonight was no different. You could already feel yourself getting wet, and he had barely done anything yet. But then suddenly he was pinching your nipple harshly, hissing in your ear, "I expect an answer when I ask you a question darling."

You bit back a moan, trying to remember what you were even arguing about as he started to play with your breasts, "I-I didn't mean it like that. I just… I don't want to embarrass you."

It was humiliating to admit but it was true. Not many people of Astarion's caliber insisted on a singular lover. There were so many people after him now, people with more power, more beauty, and grace. You didn't match up. You couldn't.

"Nonsense," Astarion dismissed, his hands wandering down to tear off more of your clothing, "Look at you. You were made for this life. Made for me. You're gorgeous."

The compliments mixed with the harsh feeling of his hands ripping your nightdress in two was quite the experience. You could feel his own hardness pressing into your backside, twitching as he threw your ruined clothing to the side.

Then he was gripping your chin, forcing your head back up to stare into the mirror in front of you, "I said look."

You obeyed, eyes widening at what you saw. It was so strange to see yourself like this, fully exposed with your legs spread apart, flushed and panting. It nearly gave the illusion that your very image was what was causing the wetness between your legs, instead of the invisible man toying with you.

You swallowed, your throat dry as Astarion's hands wandered lower, a feather-light touch tracing up and down your slit, "You are everything. The sole reason that I'm the man I am today. There is nowhere else you should be than right here."

"But-" You gasped, your words interrupted by a sharp slap to your inner thigh. You could see your skin start to redden in the mirror, a perfect imprint left in it's wake.

"Darling, are you questioning my judgment? What on earth made you think that was a good idea?"

You frantically shook your head, moaning when his fingers delved deeper, playing with your slick folds, "I-I'm not. I didn't- I'm sorry."

You whined as he roughly pinched your clit, his other hand moving upward to do the same to your heaving chest.

He was starting to grind his hardness against you, a tease of more to come as he murmured in your ear, "There's my good girl. Was that so hard?"

You shook your head, gasping as he finally dipped his long fingers into your cunt. You were already so sensitive, humiliatingly close in a matter of minutes.

"So gorgeous," Astarion sighed, staring straight ahead to the sole image of you, whimpering as he finger-fucked your pussy, "So needy. Can you see how wet you are pet?"

You could, you were leaking around his fingers, that needy, intense feeling getting more and more intense by the moment. It was so embarrassing seeing yourself like this, enough so that you snapped your eyes shut.

A bad idea. Astarion tutted at you, landing another sudden and hard slap to your thigh, "None of that. I told you to look. Or else."

You snapped your eyes back open, watching yourself whimper and gasp as you were played with, the harsh movement of his hand jostling your breasts. You weren't going to last much longer, not with the image of you being taken apart, the feeling of him inside you, the mean edge to your love's words.

"You're such a silly little thing, aren't you?" Astarion growled, fucking you harder and faster. You were so close, but you weren't stupid enough to come without permission. Not after what he did the last time, "Doubting me. Do you really think I don't know what's best for you? What's best for us?"

"No," You whimpered, your hips arching backward to rub harder into his erection, "You're right, I-I'm yours. C-Can I come now? Please?"

"Beg me and maybe I'll think about it," Astarion meanly laughed, relishing in the gush of slick his harshness coaxed from between your legs, "Beg and apologize. Apologize for doubting us. For doubting me."

You could barely get the words out through your own gasps, tears prickling in the corner of your eyes, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I-I didn't mean it!"

"Good girl," Astarion huskily laughed, using a clever thumb to rub over your swollen clit, "Now tell me you love me."

"I love you," You said easily, meaning every word, "I love you more than anything.

"Tell me you'll never leave me. Ever."

There was something else behind that promise. An obvious implication that your fucked-out brain was too distracted to see.

"Never," You promised, reaching back for you him. You curled your fingers into his hair. pulling his head down to press his mouth against your throat. An open invitation, "I'll always be with you."

Astarion groaned against your skin, his fangs so close to piercing, "Precious pet, how could I ever want anything else? Come darling, you've earned it."

Then he was biting you, the brief flash of pain the perfect trigger for you to fall over the edge. You came with an embarrassingly high-pitched whine, slumping back into Astarion as he drank from your throat.

You looked as much of a mess as you felt, the stickiness between your thighs glistening in the light. You watched yourself, whimpering as Astarion slipped his fingers out. Just to tap them against your lips, forcing them into your mouth to suck on.

You moaned around them, light-headed as Astarion popped off of your throat. You sighed as he licked at the wound, enjoying the brief moment of rest. You weren't naive enough to think that you were done yet. Not when Astarion was still hard, his cock pulsing against you.

"See?" Astarion huskily laughed, licking the blood off of his lips while he played with your tongue, "You're perfect. Perfect and mine."

#astarion #ascended astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #baldur's gate 3 #asks #check the intro warnings #graphic #m/f pairing

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garadinervi · 7 months

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The Elements According to Relative Abundance, by William F. Sheehan, University of Santa Clara, CA, 1970 [Science History Institute, Philadelphia, PA]

#graphic design #typography #chemistry #periodic table of the elements #william f. sheehan #dmitrij ivanovič mendeleev #science history institute #1970s

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princemick · 1 year

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one. o. four.

#my brain thought of it the second I saw the pic n I acc kinda like this graphic so yay #f #formula 1 #lewis hamilton #kyle.graphics #lewishamiltonedit #f1edit #hungarian gp 2023 #hungary23

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loveisunison · 3 months

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Shout-out to self shippers with "scary" disorders, and I'm talking about the really stigmatized ones. Shout-out to self shippers with "bad" and "scary" symptoms. Shout-out to self shippers who are trying to be good and still do bad things because of their disorder.

Shout-out to schizospec self shippers, shout-out to system self shippers, shout-out to cluster b self shippers, shout-out to low empathy self shippers and shout-out to everyone else who not only has to deal with their mental health issues but also the fact that nobody else understands. And to those who are deemed crazy or evil.

Your f/o loves you, actually, and despite how many times you fall into tendencies that are "too much" for anyone else; they will always love you. No matter how many people call you evil, they will still love you and they will know there's a part of you that wants to be good.

And you know what? If there's no part of you that wants to be good and you're still doing your best to remain kind despite your nature, I see you, and your f/o does too. And they still love you, they always will.

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tinalbion · 2 months

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'𝐓𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐞' ||

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: The Ghoul x fem!Reader

𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄! Minors, DO NOT interact! Smut with plot, oral (female receiving), vaginal fingering, murder, canon typical language, attempted kidnapping, radiation poisoning

𝐋𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐭𝐡: 10k

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: The second part (sort of) to Perfectly Misaligned, someone read it and was curious about the radiation poisoning aspect, so I gave it to them! The Ghoul trusts your judgment after being in his company for about a year now, but after your shared night together, you made what you thought was a simple mistake that almost cost your life not once, but twice. Will the Ghoul be able to save you?

If he had just gotten out of his own head, then maybe he would have noticed how ill you’d been feeling, and maybe it wouldn’t have progressed the way it did. Or maybe if he would have just minded his own damn business and kept you at arm’s length like he initially wanted to, neither of you would be in this mess in the first place.

But even in those two hundred years wandering the wastelands, he was bound to make a mistake, even if he didn’t want to acknowledge it was possible.

He knew you were smart enough when it came to survival, so he never questioned you or your methods or how you handled your personal affairs. So you both trudged on after the rad storm and only mere days later, you two were on your way, scouting small dives and gathering spots for low lives and scum that would do just about anything for some caps or chems. It had been an awkward time for the both of you after the night you shared, and both of you were too apprehensive to speak of the things you’d done in case the other had disapproved of the conversation. And once again, you knew better than to push it, besides, you both came to an agreement that night: a proposal between you both to release some tension when needed. That was it.

Maybe it was best not to push it too far in case he changed his mind, so you’d give him time, you were patient. But the Ghoul was the complete opposite. He disguised himself to be the type who could wait out anything, but there was always that itch, much like the one in his trigger finger that kept his decisions impulsive and sporadic.

So you continued, pushing yourself to venture forth, falling back into old habits with your memory of him in such a compromising way tucked in the back of your mind. You did what you did best and sought information, some of the targets easily let their drunken thoughts slip when a pretty girl sat with them and liquored them up, others were more guarded and kept their eye on you, but nothing a little touch to their inner thigh wouldn't fix, all while the Ghoul watched intently from afar.

He often watched how you slipped into the part so easily, and the part you played depended on the person you needed the information from. It was rare in the beginning for him to see you like this, and hell, he even fancied seeing just how easily people had been sidetracked by your seductions when he first watched you work. But the more he watched, the more he paid attention to the movements of your hands, the way your body tensed whenever they would touch you, and how you fought the urge to recoil but kept your expressions as neutral as possible. Oh, how he found it to be enjoyable! He had a curious thought as he watched you, he wondered if there was something about him that made you come to him with such a personal offer.

The corner of his mouth would pull into a cocky smile whenever he'd watch, his whiskey eyes stared with interest as he would see your face light up as soon as the information left the man's lips, and your head would turn slightly to meet the Ghoul’s gaze across the room. The slight smirk on your face, when you struck gold, was a sight he welcomed, and not just for the payload that it came with.

You'd slip away from the informant as soon as he was stupid enough to look away, easily slipping out of his sight and outside, away from prying eyes. The Ghoul would be right behind you on your heels, walking in sync with your footfalls.

Most times, he'd tease you about how well you handled the men -and the women- when getting the information you needed, but this time, he was silent as he trailed alongside you. You looked at him from the corner of your eyes and silently regarded him, but you knew he had something to say and refused to say it.

“You good?” He finally managed to ask, his eyes flickered over your face and then back ahead.

Your brows furrowed together, confused by his question. “Why wouldn’t I be?” You asked him, your hand holding onto the strap of your bag as you adjusted it. “I got us the information, didn’t I?”

What he didn’t tell you was that your skin was more flushed than usual, and your forehead seemed to shine with the glaze of sweat that constantly coated it lately, but he figured you knew and decided not to comment on it considering you could take care of yourself. “Course you did,” he assured with that typical grin.

You dropped it after that and continued your travels to the next town, which was a bit further away from your usual haunts, but you both could handle yourselves, yet there was a small nagging feeling in the back of your head. But as much as you tried to ignore it, you couldn't ignore the feeling that was creeping through your body.

You set up camp near a small lake, or what was left of the pathetic excuse of a puddle that used to be a lake, and you stared out across the hillside while the fire crackled behind you. The Ghoul sat and fried up some of the meat he'd taken from some poor man's hide while you sipped greedily at your canteen, drinking the last few drops of the only water you had. You could boil some of what was left, maybe make it drinkable, but you were tired. Your body had felt as if it had been crushed by a yao guai the past two days, and you just chalked it up to constantly being on the move, you tried to assure yourself that was it. But you knew you were working against time now, and you couldn't bring the Ghoul into your personal fuck ups. The shame you felt for not realizing your stupidity sooner ate away at you.

“It's like I'm campin’ with a mute nowadays, the hell is goin’ on in that head of yours, Bunny?”

You turned away from the skyline glittered with stars and looked over at him, his intense stare already on you. “What do you mean?” You asked.

“Ever since, well, you know when, you've been actin’ strange, almost distant, even.” He didn't move, his gaze didn't soften, he was more annoyed by your behavior than anything.

“I've just been tired, feeling real out of it lately, I dunno, just need a good night's sleep I think.” You reached up and rubbed your neck, your eyes drooped slightly. You felt the fatigue hit you like a ton of bricks. “It has nothing to do with that night, I promise.”

This seemed to give the Ghoul something to think about, but he had no reason not to trust you, you hadn't given him a single reason yet. He nodded and leaned back again, resting against a large rock while he enjoyed the warmth of the fire before he headed into the large tent you'd both set up for the evening, but there was still something off about you, he just couldn’t put his finger on it.

You joined him soon after at the fire and tried your best to keep that usual cheery disposition the Ghoul seemed to enjoy, but you’d fallen asleep sooner than expected as you listened to one of the many stories he liked to tell about his adventures across the wastelands. What you didn’t plan on was the Ghoul carrying you into the tent as you barely stirred, the worry he had was gone when you seemed to sleep comfortably, and he watched as your chest rose and fell as you looked so gentle while you dreamed.

The days passed and you were feeling worse, your body was trying its best to fight off what you were suffering and it wasn't succeeding, but you kept your spirits high as you continued your journey, but you desperately needed to get your hands on some RadAway as soon as possible. You were mad at your carelessness after the night you and the Ghoul shared, thinking that all would be well if you were to take some of the chem to take care of the exposure you experienced. But after a few run-ins during your travels, you hadn't realized that the last couple of packs you had were used up, you were completely out.

Your hands dug around frantically in your worn bag as you pushed your items around, looking intently for the familiar IV bag filled with liquid, or maybe one of the needles you got from that last merchant, but there was nothing. Your heart poured hard against your chest as the panic set in, but you couldn't bear to tell the Ghoul of your carelessness, this was no one's fault but your own, and you'd take care of it. If you didn't, what if he refused to touch you again? He wouldn’t find all the trouble you went through worth it, so he’d remain closed off to you once again, and you felt that it was a worse fate than suffering from radiation poisoning.

Ridiculous, you knew this, but no amount of chems could beat the high you felt when his hands touched you the way they did.

While the Ghoul tracked down which way a bounty could have gone, you ransacked everything you could in the abandoned diner that had a few parked cars still in front of it. You checked inside of those, then dug around the drawers, cabinets, and anything you could find that could have hidden away some treasures—desperation at its finest. The Ghoul just figured you were looking for extra caps or scrap to sell, which you often did in between merchants and settlements, so he left you to it. He walked along the inside as he waited for you, then quizzically pressed a button, which activated a jukebox that still seemed to work.

“Well, hot damn,” he chuckled as the song started playing, transporting him back to when things didn't seem all that bad before the bombs dropped. If there was a time before he could go back to, it was when life wasn't so complicated, where it wasn't tooth and nail to fight to survive. He could wake up and expect to pour his heart out on the big screen, capturing the characters he so loved to play, but he hadn't thought of that part of him in so long, he was but a distant memory that no longer existed, that man was too weak to survive in the wastelands.

While he reminisced about a time long past, you continued to dig around the area frantically, but you finally accepted that you wouldn't find anything you were looking for. The heavy sigh that left your lips echoed throughout the room. You'd never been so careless before, but you wouldn't dwell on that now, you had to get going and trudge on to another merchant.

You stepped out of the back of the dining kitchen and peeked your head around to see where your traveling companion had gotten to, but it was quiet, save for the trickle of music you heard coming from the half-destroyed jukebox. It was a song your parents played for you when you could recall a time in the kitchen, your eyes closed gently and you smiled as you thought back on it. You were so wrapped up in the memory that you didn’t hear the heavy footsteps of the Ghoul step up beside you.

You looked over to see him regarding the jukebox with a sort of fondness in his eyes until he pulled his gaze to you, and then he wore a mischievous grin.

“What?” You asked him suspiciously.

He hummed and reached over to grab your hand, pulling you into his grasp while his other hand rested gently on your waist. A side of this man you hadn’t known existed had begun to shine through little by little, a rare occasion for you both to witness.

“What are you doing?”

“What’s it look like, Bunny?” He asked dryly.

You just scoffed and allowed him to lead you across the floor, the weight of surviving and struggling through another day no longer a main concern, for now, you just enjoyed the moment before it fleeted away from you. You hadn’t danced in, well, you couldn’t recall when you ever did, but there was no time to think about that considering the Ghoul had tapped your boot with his own, getting you to move your foot. He told you to watch how he moved his feet, you had to mimic the direction in which he moved so you could follow along, and the more confident you became, the less stiff your body moved with his. Soon, you were swaying across the broken tiles and old debris, laughing at the way you felt lighthearted and silly, but the privacy of the moment was something you’d want to hold onto forever.

‘It isn’t your sweet conversation

That brings this sensation

Oh no, it’s just the nearness of you-’

As sick as you were feeling, this dance lesson was something that you were glad you didn’t miss, but your body was fighting against you despite how happy you were feeling. You scolded yourself, hoping you could hang on for a little bit longer, but the Ghoul looked down at you as the gentle piano of the song played in the background, his eyes in those sunken-in sockets seemed troubled.

“You sure you’re good? You seem sicker than a dog lately, you feelin’ alright?”

“I uh, I’ll be fine, promise,” you lied with a small smile. “Just living in the moment, this is nice.”

He chuckled and knew you weren’t being completely honest with him, but if you knew what you were doing, then who was he to say otherwise? “Whatever you say, Bunny. And you ain’t too bad on your feet.” He smirked as he tested the waters and pulled away from you, then gave you a little spin.

You spun and laughed as you almost tipped over, but he caught you with ease and he pulled you back flat on your feet. He stared down at you and wondered what it was you were thinking about, though he felt he wouldn’t admit to what he was thinking if given the chance.

You looked up at him with the same look on your face, and your soft smile only grew when he kept staring. If only you could just have a bit of normalcy, you craved having just a slice of it like you once had, but all you could picture was him here with you, sort of in a moment like this one. This could be your new normal, him standing here with you, dancing around the desolate diner with the scratchy music playing. You laughed internally at the thought, but it didn’t hurt to pretend for now, but you’d deal with the ramifications later.

You thought you could feel it; the spark of something in the way he looked at you, and the way his hands held onto you as if you belonged here in his grasp, but you weren’t entirely sure. He didn’t budge, he was as still as a hunter watching its prey from the tall grass, but before you could say a word, the sudden rise of bile stung your throat. You began to cough and violently jerked from his arms and flung yourself away, gagging as you fell to your knees while you released the contents of your stomach onto the floor.

The Ghoul’s face turned to shock as he was beside you in an instant, his hand on your back while he stared down at you in sheer panic. “Bunny, what- are you okay?” He would wait for your answer while he attempted to comfort you, but human ailments hadn’t been a worry for him in so long, he had no idea what would be wrong.

After a moment, your breathing was heavy and you attempted to catch your breath before you responded. “I… I fucked up, cowboy, I’m sorry…” You turned to him, and the tears in your eyes from retching stung your eyes.

“You didn’t do nothin’ of the sort-”

“I ran out of RadAway, I didn’t take anything after that night… I was careless.” You huffed as you stared up at him, looking and feeling so ashamed of your carelessness. As you were about to speak again, an odd sensation took over your body and you felt a sudden wave of dizziness, your eyes fluttered, and then you felt everything go black.

The poisoning coursed through you rather quickly without any medicine, but the Ghoul didn’t have a drop on him either, so you were running on borrowed time until your body began to shut down and change drastically. He caught you before you fell unconscious, then slowly got to his feet and hoisted you into his arms, your limp body cradled against his chest as he searched around the diner for a safe place to keep you. He didn’t find much until his head tilted up as he groaned in frustration, his eyes then spotted a latch that led up to an attic or storage space of some kind.

He gently set you down away from the area and opened the door, then climbed up the wooden ladder that slid down, and he peeked around to check the hidden room. It had been untouched for years up there, things were still neatly placed and packed away, so this would be the safest area to keep you until he could return.

Once you were up in the storage space and laid out on your blanket, he covered you with your jacket and looked around, hoping he could get lucky with a hidden medkit, but he turned up empty-handed.

“Dammit,” he muttered as he looked back at you. He knew you’d be pissed if he left you here, but he hid you away, you’d be safe until he returned. The Ghoul wasn’t sure how far away the next town was from where you were, so maybe he could return to the one previous. He had to do something, anything to get you what you needed before things took a turn for the worst, vomiting was only the beginning. He knelt beside you for a moment and looked down at your features, his eyes scanned your skin, anything that was alarming, but it had only been a few days since you both got close. He had time.

“I ain’t gonna be long, Bunny, I promise,” he muttered low, his gloved hand pulling your jacket up further to keep you covered, resisting the urge to smooth out your hair as a lover would do. “We’re gonna get you better.”

He stood and looked down at you while you slept, afraid to leave but too afraid to stay, he couldn’t just sit idly by and do nothing. So he left you there, locking up the crawl space door to assure your safety while he was away. It was an odd feeling as he traveled alone, not having you with him on an adventure almost felt wrong in a way, but the journey would hopefully be a quick one.

His feet felt heavier than usual as he walked out of the diner, but he turned to look back at the decaying building and stared up at the walls that held you safely within them, but it was difficult for him to move forward. With a deep sigh and a hardened gaze, he sought after what he needed, and internally, that small little voice in his head had prayed for a miracle that you would be okay.

You weren’t sure what happened, you were happily dancing one minute with the Ghoul, and the next was a complete blank, you just remember falling and that was it. Your eyes barely opened as you lazily rolled your head to the side, trying to focus your sight. You looked for him in your haze, calling out to him weakly, but no one responded to your calls. The Ghoul was probably just making sure no one approached the vicinity, you knew he would be overprotective in your current state. Another reason you cherished your friendship.

Friendship, if that's what you want to call it.

Your head was pounding and your body felt weak, on fire, and had the chills all at once, so you may have rested until he returned to your side. But the pain in your head was too much as it throbbed annoyingly, what else could you do but lay there as you stared at the ceiling filled with small holes? Yet the longer you lay there in silence, the more you realized just how quiet it was, and then you wondered if he was truly still wandering around the vicinity.

What if he took it upon himself to… no, you had hoped not, that wasn't in your plans. You wanted to take care of it yourself when you were able to sleep it off, and yet there was the possibility that he took it upon himself. You slowly pushed yourself to your feet and almost tumbled into the wall, but you regained your footing well enough as you looked around the room. There was no indication he was here, even when you looked out of the second-story window, there was nothing.

“Dammit,” you muttered.

Of course, you caused problems for him, took him away from his work, and foiled it all. He'd never look at you again in such high regard, would he? Not after this. You cursed yourself and stumbled back to your makeshift bed, feeling the roughness of your dry throat that ached for water. As you reached for your pack, you hoped he'd come back and still give you a chance. Sleep was clawing at you again while you wondered if you could force yourself to remain awake, but you hadn't stood a chance. Your eyes closed and you prayed to whoever would listen to have him look at you like he did before.

While you had slept, the Ghoul made decent progress across the wastelands to acquire what you needed, and he hoped he’d get it in time before your body shut down any further. He kept pushing the negative thoughts from his mind, whistling or humming that tune from the diner, just trying to make it through. Along the way, he took out raiders, random lone gunmen, and anyone else who figured he was easy pickings, patting them down after their bodies fell with a hard thud to the ground. He’d gathered a small collection of RadAway in his bag, but surely not enough to help you get back to yourself, so he promised himself only to find a few more.

It was after this personal promise that he had stumbled into some hideout he didn’t know existed, yet he still pressed forward as if he had no time to deal with the several men who stepped out and blocked the view of the windows all around the destroyed building, but they insisted he stop to have a chat.

“Ain’t got time for autographs, boys, I got somethin’ important I gotta do,” he said as he brushed them off, walking past them without a second glance.

One of the raiders scoffed and raised his gun, cocking it to catch the Ghoul’s attention. “I ain’t askin’, freak,” the gunner guffawed. “Gimme what’s in your bag, now.”

The Ghoul took this as an insult, so he turned on his heels rather slowly, comically so as he looked at the four men who stood here, holding him up from his mission. “The fuck you just say to me?” He asked with a scoff. His hand had already rested comfortably on the hilt of his hand cannon, watching all the men with interest, mapping out the direction from which they’d all come after him. He was meticulous with his planning, making sure each bullet he shot wouldn’t go to waste.

“You heard us, ghoul,” another man spat in reply, “give us what you got and you can keep your arms, possibly.”

The Ghoul chuckled to himself and lowered his gaze, his face hidden by the brim of his hat. “Now, I ain’t one to back down from a challenge, but I got someone who needs help. So I’ll cut y’all a deal. You got any RadAway? I’ll happily give you whatever is in this here bag,” he said as he patted the leather saddle bag.

Whether it was a trick or not, the men figured if all he wanted was RadAway, he was stupid enough to trade it all for that. The one closest to the door walked inside, disappeared for a few moments, and came back with an entire bag filled with RadAway.

“Figure with all the caps you probably got in there, we could buy more than we got,” the man laughed and tossed the bag onto the ground before him. “Now hand over the bag nice and easy,” he said.

“Well now,” the Ghoul started as he slid the bag from his shoulder and let it drop, “seems there’s been a change of plans, gentlemen.” With a fast hand and an even faster draw, the hand cannon was out and he shot all four men before they had a chance to react. “Been a pleasure doin’ business.”

He walked up to the discarded bag and grabbed the IV bags, peering inside to ensure they were all accounted for. Most were untouched while others looked a tad worse for wear, but it was enough to be able to help you out and get you back on your feet. Just as he was about to throw his saddleback back over his shoulder, one last man emerged from the broken-down shack and took aim at the Ghoul.

“You don't deserve to leave after what you did,” the man spat.

The Ghoul stopped and cocked his head, not even bothering to look back at the man. “None of us deserve shit one way or the other, but my companion don't deserve to die.”

“Companion? You think your companion wants to be around you in the first place? You're a fucking ghoul, a freak. Probably just playin’ sick to get rid of you. But if it's RadAway you need, you're gonna end up killin’ ‘em anyway. Do them the favor and get the hell away from ‘em.”

The Ghoul had more patience than a saint at that moment, but the part about killing you, it struck a nerve. Without looking back, he put an explosive bullet straight into the man's forehead, his head exploded with a large pop, and his body fell to the ground.

“Fuck you,” the Ghoul huffed, grabbed his prize, his bag, and hustled back to the abandoned diner.

If he hurried fast enough without stopping, maybe you had a fighting chance.

You had thrown up several more times and could barely move from your makeshift bed, your limbs felt sore and your entire body was on fire. It felt uncomfortable just to lay there. How could you be so careless? Even though you were suffering from the effects of radiation poisoning, you knew that you'd never regret the decision you made that night. You’d happily do it again if given the chance.

As you lay there half dazed, half-conscious, you swore you heard a melody from outside the gas station, you weren’t entirely sure. Poorly sung, the lyrics sounded screechy, it wasn’t exactly pleasant. But the voice wasn’t his, so you pushed yourself up as slowly and quietly as possible as you attempted to make your way over to the window. The sun was setting, the large ball of light almost hidden below the horizon as you peeked through the broken glass, seeing a group of three raiders wandering about as they heard the song playing on the jukebox.

You didn’t even realize it was still playing considering you’d been so out of it, but they figured someone had to have come here. Your plan was to be as quiet as possible, allowing them to think their timing was off, that someone just passed through and paid no mind to stick around. If push came to shove, you’d hole up on the roof and take them out from a higher ground. The Ghoul had taught you some basics since you would have rather run from combat than be a part of it, but he knew it was important to know if a situation ever arose. You’d have to thank him later for those helpful tips if you ended up needing them.

The adrenaline was pumping through your system as they got closer, carelessly wandering, swinging their weapons into the nearby cars just for the sake of destruction. You wanted them to leave as soon as possible, so you hugged the nearest corner with your gun firmly in your grasp, and you did your best not to pass out at the most inopportune moment while you pressed your back against the wall.

The smaller man who had been looking around the outside of the diner didn’t seem interested in sticking around, but the other two wanted to be thorough in their search for anything worth the caps.

“Davie, c’mon, man, there’s nothing here,” the small man grumbled.

The larger man just laughed. “And what, you some all seeing, all knowing motherfucker now, Francis?”

“Shut up, dick.” Francis huffed and waited outside, keeping an eye on the skyline in case there would be trouble.

The second man followed Davie inside the diner to scout around for anything, and he started pressing buttons on the jukebox.

“Quit fuckin’ with that, Daren,” Davie barked as he tossed an empty box at him.

Daren huffed and continued to make his way around the diner, finding nothing of interest, but they made sure not to leave any stone unturned.

As you sat up in the corner, you figured there was still a small chance they’d come up there, spot you, and do who knows what, but you had no real backup plan in case that were to happen. Maybe cover yourself with the blanket, pretend you were some discarded junk? Would that work? Raiders weren’t exactly the smartest bunch, but they’d smell you a mile away in a ridiculous cover, most likely.

You calmed your breathing as they continued to ransack the kitchen area, right below where you were resting in the corner, and you couldn’t help but clasp your hand over your mouth just in case. You listened for them, pinpointing where they could be, how far away their voices were, or how close they’d gotten. Maybe they’d overlook the door altogether, they surely weren’t that thorough, right?

“Shit, Davie, there’s a door leading upstairs-” Daren pointed out, and you heard him tug at the small latch connected to it.

Your heart dropped in the pit of your stomach as your entire body froze, your eyes went wide as you slowly pointed the gun toward the opening in case you needed to use it, but your hands were shaking so badly. Your vision blurred as you tried your best to will yourself still.

‘Don’t you dare pass out now, you idiot, keep still-’ You willed yourself, your hands slowly steadying to the best of your abilities. Your entire body was suddenly taken over with chills, your strength had been sapped from you as you leaned your head back, praying that they’d skip out on searching up there.

The footsteps beneath you got louder and you heard the door being yanked at. “What d’you think is up there?”

“Maybe the owner’s corpse with all his riches,” Daren laughed and pushed the door, but it was slightly stuck, so he slammed into it with his fist. The door was unlatched and splintered, causing it to remain slightly open.

Your body was shaking as you cowered deep into the corner, hoping they’d just gloss over you, but as soon as Daren stuck his head up through the opening, his eyes landed on you. You shook your head, hoping he wouldn’t say a word, your hand was hiding the gun beside you as you crouched down, but you couldn’t see well with the sweat beading onto your forehead dripping down your face.

“Well, well, we don’t have a corpse with riches, but we have a payload,” the man chuckled and pressed his way upward.

“What’cha got, Daren?” Davie asked as he remained downstairs.

“Please-” you begged him, “I have nothing, just take whatever’s in my bag, I’m sick…” You whispered, hoping he’d have a change of heart.

He ignored everything you said and yanked at your wrist, causing you to yell out and quickly shoot a bullet into his arm. The raider released you and that’s when you scrambled toward the broken window, and despite your body screaming at you to not overexert yourself, you pushed through it and rolled onto the crackled shingles.

“The fuck happened?!” Davie barked as he climbed up the small ladder.

“There’s a girl, we can use her for parts!” Daren called back, and Davie was immediately crawling up to assess the damage. “She fuckin’ shot me,” he growled as he ripped off a piece of his shirt, wrapping it around the wound. “Fuckin’ SHOT ME.”

You were too busy trying to figure out how badly it would hurt to drop down from this height, but you had either two large men manhandling you to deal with, or the smaller raider to grab you as soon as you hit the ground. You could probably take him, so you opted for the latter. As you timed it, you jumped and tried your best to land where you could shoot up right away and run, but Francis was too fast. He’d been assessing the entire thing from the outside, his weapon drawn, but once he caught sight of you, he yanked out the rope he had wrapped around his belt.

“Where you goin’, sweetheart?”

“Fuck you,” you spat as you aimed and shot toward him, but you missed by just a few inches. “Fuck-”

Francis bolted toward you, his weapon drawn in one hand while the other gripped at the rope. He had a baseball bat primed and ready to incapacitate you if need be, swinging it mostly at your legs to bring you down, but you aimed your gun again and this time hit him in the shoulder. He let out an annoyed yell, then dug through his pocket, sucked in some sort of chemical, and you watched in horror as his expression transformed.

His eyes bulged out, growing wide as the chem worked its way through his body, and the bullet wound was just a passing memory. He grew sporadic and violent with his swings, not calculating exactly where to hit, but blindly swinging so he’d at least hit something. You did your best to dodge and roll out of the way as he would hit, barely take a breath, and swing again, the speed in which he worked was insane.

“Just leave me alone! I just wanna be left alone!” You screamed at the man, but if he could hear you, he showed no signs of listening.

Davie and Daren popped out to see the smaller man going straight for you, so they decided to get around you and cut you off before you could run anywhere else. “Goin’ somewhere, sweetheart?” Daren yelled out a string of profanities and launched toward you, grabbed you by your arm, and yanked it hard, causing you to drop your only weapon.

Davie went around and grabbed your other arm, both of them lifting you from the ground as you dangled in between their grasp helplessly.

“Let me go!” You screamed again.

“You shot me you fuckin’ whore, I ain’t letting you go after that. You’re going to the harvesters.”

“No, please, please! I’m sick!” You thrashed in their grasp, kicking your feet as they held onto you with a firm grip. With as much force as you could, you lunged at one of their arms and bit down.

Daren shouted again and reeled his arm back, slapping you hard. You let out a cry and kicked even more, but Francis grabbed at your legs, tying them up before you could do any real damage before his chem ran out. Then the two larger men dropped you, taking that opportunity to tie you up completely, sure that you couldn’t escape your bonds now.

“You wanna do the honors and carry her?” Davie asked.

“Fuck that, she shot and bit me,” Daren scoffed, kicking you in the ribs.

Your body folded as you let out a cry, but Davie housed you up and tossed you over his shoulder. “Fine, fuckin’ whiney ass-”

“‘Scuse the hell out of you but where the fuck you think you’re goin’ with my girl, there?” A voice called to them from behind.

The three men all turned to look toward the Ghoul that stood there, his eyes glued to the figures that held onto his lucky rabbit's foot, and they sized him up without much worry. Daren’s annoyance grew with hearing your yells and seeing yet another obstacle in their way.

“We found her first, ghoul, you can get your own smoothie somewhere else, yeah? She seems in top-notch condition and I ain’t one for sharin’.”

The Ghoul looked straight at you, taking notice in the smile you shot him as if to say thank goodness you’re here, he knew there’d be no way you’d want to escape him, right? “That there rabbit’s foot is mine, I don’t feel like partin’ with her just yet. So I’ll give you to the count of three to release her, or I’ll make you.”

The three men laughed hysterically and had no intentions of letting you go, and the smaller one -Francis- stepped forward. “Not sure if you heard us considerin’ your ears are kinda… gone? But She’s ours, finders keepers.”

“And I said, no.” The Ghoul said sternly, taking a single step forward, the familiar jingle of his boot spur seemed to cause you some comfort. “One.” The Ghoul held up his hand canon, took aim at the man on your right, Davie, and continued to glare.

“You really got a problem here?”

Francis quickly took aim with the hidden .223 pistol he had stashed on his person and let out a bullet, hitting the Ghoul in his left shoulder. His body jerked slightly but he didn’t allow the force of the bullets to deter him much.

“Two.”

Francis let off several more rounds into the Ghoul’s chest while Davie took out his 14mm pistol and landed a couple of rounds in him as well, but the Ghoul didn’t fall, nor did he back down. He smiled wickedly as he aimed his hand cannon, shooting each bullet off in succession.

“Three.”

Daren’s left arm blasted off, and the splatter of blood covered your face as you ducked and yanked yourself from their grip, then Davie’s throat had been shot clean through, causing him to drop instantly. Francis was left alive, but barely, as he was attempting to crawl off with one missing leg. He was still riding the effects of the chem he inhaled, but they’d die off quickly with all the blood loss.

The Ghoul was one to play with his prey, so he slowly sauntered up to the raider and chuckled at the pathetic attempt of his escape. “Well damn,” he said as he squatted down closer and dug his finger into the gaping wound of his leg, causing him to scream.”If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that hurts.”

“Pl-please, stop, don’t h-hurt me, okay, man?! We just needed caps!”

“Ah well, I just needed to bring her some medicine to help her get better, and here you thought you could just up and take her?” He asked as he stood up, tilting his head down at the man with a mischievous smirk. He placed his boot onto the end of Francis’s leg and applied a gentle amount of pressure to keep him from crawling off too far.

You watched all of this, not feeling much remorse for him or the others after what they planned on doing to you, but you had no idea what you could have done if he hadn’t shown up when he did. You felt useless as you stood up shakily, your body swayed slightly as you tried to steady yourself, still feeling the poisoning coursing through you. The cold feeling took over and you felt your entire body drain of color as you fell to the ground again, but despite feeling faint again, you felt safe knowing he was here to help you.

The Ghoul’s eyes widened as you fell, so he removed his foot from the raider’s injury and aimed without a second thought at his head, blowing him away and taking care of the last issue that remained. He eagerly scooped you into his arms and knelt down beside you, digging through his pack to fish out the IV bag you needed. Wordlessly, he stared down at you as he opened your mouth, tipping the liquid inside as he watched you swallow it. When it went down smoothly, he let out a sigh of relief and let his head fall back, staring up at the sky as he thanked whatever was watching over you.

He sat there with you in his arms, his eyes directed toward the sky, and he laughed. “Fuckin’ lucky rabbit’s foot,” he mumbled as he slid the bag back onto his shoulder and hoisted you into his arms, taking you back to your bed in the attic of the diner.

You awoke with a fierce headache, but your body overall didn’t feel like your blood was on fire, which was oddly suspicious. You recalled almost being kidnapped and taken, but then he appeared like some sort of twisted guardian angel, saving you at the last minute. The sun wasn’t up any longer, it was pitch black outside as you opened your eyes, the weariness of sleep slowly lifting like a veil being pulled up from your view. You turned to see him there, right next to you as he leaned his back against the wall, his hat tipped slightly low to cover his eyes as he tried to rest. There was no way to tell what he’d been through while he was gone, but he seemed pretty exhausted when he returned, or maybe you were delirious, but you were thankful he was here now.

The urge to wake him was strong, wanting to just thank him profusely for what he’d done for you, it was more than anyone had done for you in your entire life. Without much debate, you sat up slowly and crawled over toward him, allowing your head to gently rest against his lap. He hadn’t stirred much, probably too worn from his travels to get that life-saving RadAway for you. You weren’t sure how you could ever repay him, but you’d figure it out.

When morning came, you found yourself back in your makeshift bed, tucked in and comfortable with the Ghoul somehow laying next to you, his jacket draped over you for extra warmth, his hand abandoned to the side as he slept. But your slight movements woke him, and his deep still-human eyes met yours, sending your nerves on end.

“Well, good morning, Bunny, you feelin’ any better?”

You nodded and stared into his eyes, unsure what to say or how to say it. “You got all that for me?” You asked, your voice soft and gentle as I looked over at the opened bag, the large handful of IV bags resting comfortably inside.

The Ghoul peeked over to the bag and back at you with a small smile. “Possibly,” he replied coolly. “Had to make sure you didn’t go and die on me,” he chuckled. “I ain’t done with you yet.”

You figured that was the sweetest confession you’d get from a man like this, so you took it and smiled wide while you scooted your body closer to his, gripping onto the remnants of his tattered shirt. “Thank you, cowboy, wouldn’t know what to do without you. And I’m sorry… I shouldn’t been so stupid-”

“You ain’t stupid, you should always tell me shit like this though, I could’a got some for you sooner,” he chastised. “Don’t hide shit like that, okay?” He seemed annoyed, but not by you, by the fact he could have lost you.

There wasn’t a way you could pinpoint what he was feeling, this man was a complicated creature, so you just stared across at the wall as you thought about your next words. “I just… didn’t want to trouble you. You think I’m this capable person who can help you when I’m not, I can’t even help myself. And I didn’t want you to… well…” You paused, unsure of how to word this next.

He didn’t rush you when you sought the words, he continued to lay there, offering you some form of comfort in the only way he knew how. The tension between the two of you was palpable as the time passed, and you could tell there was something on his mind.

“I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me, and I didn’t want you to pull away… I don’t regret that night, I’d do it again with the same consequences,” you said firmly.

He looked down at you, his eyes bore into yours as you spoke, telling him you would rather go through all of this pain and suffering again just to relive that night. This was stupidity, he thought, someone like you wanting to lower yourself to chase a night with him. He started to chuckle and shook his head as he looked at you.

“I could never quite get a read from you, you know that?” He said with a playful tone in his voice. “Can’t put my finger on it.”

Your hand gripped his shirt a little tighter, trying to fight that feeling that coiled in the depths of your belly, wanting to keep this moment pure and unsoiled due to how much of this hidden side the Ghoul was showing you right now, but you had a hunger for him like no other. “Is that such a bad thing?” You asked him.

This made him laugh again, his voice drawn out as there was a deep tone, almost like a mix between a hum and a growl. “Well I guess not,” he replied gently, trying to read this moment, but still being so caught off guard by your companionship, he wasn’t about to overstep. This side of him was uncharted for over two hundred years, he wasn’t sure if he was even capable of having this side of him anymore. His hand reached out and lingered over the one that gripped at his shirt, but he wasn’t sure if he should close that space.

Your head lifted to properly meet his gaze, staring into those eyes that seemed to reach the depths of your soul. “Can I do something?” You asked, your voice quiet, nervous. He nodded, allowing you to do whatever it was you wanted. With a soft push, you rolled to your knees, crawled over toward him, and gently placed your hand on his face, bringing yours closer. “You won’t be mad?”

He scoffed in response and continued to stare into your eyes, already seeing the life spring back into them, the color seeming even more bright than they were before. It was him who closed the gap between the two of you, his mouth hungrily capturing yours while he remained hands-off, allowing you to do as you please. He was just there to learn what he could, you’d show him what to do or how to go about it, he trusted you. And that was an unspoken bond if he ever had one.

Your hand that was gently placed on his face stroked his textured skin softly with the pad of your thumb, while the other hand reached forward and slowly began to undo the tattered buttons on the shirt he wore. You took comfort in knowing he would tell you if he didn’t want you to continue, so you waited for any sign of that, but you were met with none. Your mouth continued to hungrily meld with his, your tongue darting out to swipe across his bottom lip, coaxing him to open further. He tried hard not to show you were getting to him, but the breathy sigh he made when your hand made contact with the bare upper half of his chest was one he couldn’t hold back.

The smile on your face grew as you pushed the shirt from his form, both hands sliding off each side down his arms, the chill of his warm skin on yours was a feeling you sought after. He sat up and captured you in his arms, grabbing you rougher than intended, but he’d never hear you complain, and he moved your body effortlessly as he placed you down on your back, wanting to take control as he learned to explore you once again.

He wasn’t feeling cocky or sure of himself this time, nor was he hiding behind the false boastfulness of his persona that he built for himself, but for the first time in so long, that deeply buried side of his former self slowly ate through. That ancient relic of a man he once was, the one that loved deeply.

His hands began to work at your clothing, slowly removing your jacket, then your tank top and his fingers stopped at your undergarments, unsure if he should cross that line. You nodded as your hands reached behind you and removed it yourself, sliding the straps down your arms and revealing your bare skin to him. In this lighting, it was almost angelic as the sun kissed your skin through the broken window, his eyes drank in the sight of you while your hands went to remove the rest of what you wore. The Ghoul clenched his jaw when you were just about stripped, and his hands met yours at the hem of your underwear, asking to remove them himself without asking a thing. His hands skated down your outer thighs as you arched, allowing him to remove them completely.

No matter the lighting, the time of day, or whatever it was, he was very entranced by your body. How could something as soft looking as you survive in this harsh and blood-thirsty world? The dips, the curves, even the small knicks and markings you gained while being in the wastelands were like foreign land as his fingers explored you. You couldn’t handle how incredibly intimate this all felt, the Ghoul who was typically thirsty for blood and violence now examining your body as if it was his only salvation.

His head lowered to your breasts, kissing your skin softly as he left a soft, wet trail of kisses from your collarbone to your abdomen, wanting to see if he could try his luck. “I’m gonna try somethin’, tell me if you like it,” he said, breaking that silence to convey how new this was for him to get acquainted to.

You nodded. “Yeah, go ahead…”

The Ghoul’s lips continued to trail down your waist, slowly tracing along your skin with his fingers until he stopped just above your core. His fingers gently slid between the folds, testing just how excited you’d been, and he was not disappointed. You had been one to grow exceedingly excited just from his touch alone. He pulled his fingers away from you and placed several firm kisses against you, gauging those pretty little sounds you had spilled from your mouth. His hot breath tickled against your skin before his tongue slowly slid against you teasingly, then he did it again and again as your body convulsed, your muscles tensing whenever his tongue delved slightly deeper.

He’d remembered from your last encounter what really pushed you over the edge and brought his thumb against you, rubbing teasing circles against your clit while he continued to use his mouth. The sounds and cries he pulled from you were only causing him to grow hungrier, your broken sentences strung together into gibberish, only able to whine from the growing build up in your lower belly that coiled tightly.

His tongue slid further into you and your body jolted slightly, your thighs almost tightened around him, so he made himself comfortable and gripped your thighs firmly, holding them in place while he continued to assault you with his tongue.

“Fuck, cowboy,” you groaned out, your thighs shaking as he pulled away, leaving hard bites around your inner thighs and your waist, marking you to make sure you remembered who made you feel this way.

“This feelin’ good, Bunny? Am I gettin’ this right?”

“You’re driving me insane, yes, yes-” You cried out while he licked through your folds once as you spoke, the devilish smile on his face only growing wider. Your nails dug into the sleeping bag beneath you, but your hands grabbed at his shoulders and dug in slightly to his textured skin, causing the Ghoul to bury his mouth even further against you. The moans you released were almost melodious, angelic in a way.

The Ghoul now sucked at your sensitive flesh, making sure not to inflict too much pain unless you instructed him to, and one of his hands left your thigh so he could push two of his fingers deep inside of your warm sex. He was gentle at first in his movements, but the man was starved, needing to go faster with his mouth and his fingers.

“You feelin’ okay?” He asked, checking on you as your body continued to spasm beneath his grip.

All you could do was nod frantically. “I’m so close, cowboy,” you warned, your voice cracking as your entire body ignited in chills.

“Don’t hold back, Bunny, tell me how I’m doin’,” he said, leaving no room for questioning as his tongue continued to gently slide across your heated flesh. He continued to curl his fingers in a gentle motion, his eyes peered up at your face as he worked. “How badly you wanna cum?”

“Please, I need to so bad, it feels so good,” you cried out as you tried your best to hang on, wanting him to continue.

“Let go then,” the Ghoul commanded, his mouth continued to lick and suck at your folds as his fingers picked up their pace, his mouth working fervently as he tried his best to bring you close to the edge.

Your fingers gripped at the blanket beneath you, your leg still being held firmly in place while your body trembled from the pleasure, keeping you in place as you chased your orgasm. You were seeing white as you squeezed your eyes shut, you moaned out the playful nickname you gave him, not sure what else to call him as the wave of your pleasure carried you to new heights. Your body lay back against the floor as you felt the energy sapped from you, your breathing was ragged and heavy as you peeked up to see the Ghoul lean back on his knees, your release coating his mouth and chin as he quickly wiped it off with his thumb, sucking it off until he was as clean as he could get.

Words couldn’t describe what you felt with him now, being on the brink of death only to be brought back and then seek out an orgasm that hard was… it was a wave of emotions. You hoped he wouldn’t leave you there like that, but he ended up surprising you and pulling you toward him, sheltering you in his embrace as he found his spot beside you on the floor.

He couldn’t fathom what he’d say at this moment, what could he say right now? “You know, I was almost convinced you made a mistake,” he said, his voice low.

You looked up at him with a grimace, trying to understand what he meant.

“You lowerin’ yourself to get all physical with someone like me,” he clarified. “And if this keeps up, I’m just gonna end up killin’ you anyway.”

“If that was true, it would be my choice,” you said.

He looked at you curiously. “You’d want that?”

This made you laugh and you shook your head playfully. “If I have RadAway, I should be okay, not a big deal. It’s just… tempting fate I suppose. I’m gonna die at some point, why not go out a way I want to?” You teased him as your hand was placed gently against his chest.

“You’re insane,” the Ghoul huffed with a few shakes of his head. “But… I won’t lie, I kinda like it,” he hummed and ruffled your hair playfully.

This just made you laugh and tighten your grip on him, and you felt content despite everything that happened prior to this. “So, you’re not mad?”

“Mad? Well, now I wouldn’t go that far, maybe a little pissed off you didn’t think it was worth mentionin’ to me,” the Ghoul said matter-of-factly. “But I ain’t mad, just happy you’re okay. Don’t do that shit again, though.” “I promise, I won’t,” you said as you made a gesture across your chest. “Guess I’ll just have to grab a bag every time I see one.”

He looked over at you curiously, smiling that typical cocky smile he always wore, but he didn’t take the bait just yet. “Oh? Plannin’ on needin’ a supply of RadAway?” He wondered.

Your face flushed and felt warm as you reached over and stretched your arm out, grabbing one of the half-full IV bags, and then your gaze turned back to his. “If we’re planning on continuing whatever this is, I can’t be caught off guard again.”

The Ghoul’s eyes glimmered with mischievousness, staring at you with surprise. “You wanna continue this?”

This caused you to scoff and you looked up at him with a playful expression. “Of course? Why wouldn’t I? Went through all this trouble and you think I’m just gonna call it off, then you’re-”

The Ghoul placed his hand on the back of your head, pulled you closer toward him, and silenced you with his lips. It lasted for a brief moment, but it was all he needed to assure you that he was still in this, and he may have threatened you to keep it quiet before, there was almost a silent understanding that hung in the air. You would keep your word though, but for now, it was just the both of you at this moment while you climbed into his lap.

He just scoffed and watched your nude form sit atop him. “Whatcha doin’ there, Bunny?” It was only meant as playful, he would never dream of pushing you away like this, he craved you more than you realized, the taste of you was divine, too.

Your hands wrapped around his neck, pulling him in closer toward you. “I wanna show you how thankful I am you saved me.”

His eyes softened and allowed his hands to slowly slide down the curves and dips of your hips, smiling wide to himself as he watched you with great interest. “Guess I’ll have to save you more often, then.”

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