Tumgik
#fake advert
Text
It's common for Cubone to remove most of the teeth from a skull while prepping it into a helmet. Nobody's totally sure why, but scientists speculate it's to decrease the risk of injury or reduce the noise that would be caused by loose teeth rattling in their sockets. We often remove them ahead of time to increase the likelihood the Cubone will accept the skull quickly, so we always have a healthy supply of teeth lying around.
Need a weird gift? Looking for Halloween décor ideas? Need materials for your next goth jewelry craft project? Buy one of our 100% real Pokémon teeth grab bags!
15 notes · View notes
digital-chance · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
Visit Nova Futurum Today! - excerpt
Welcome to the shining metropolis of Nova Futurum, where all your greatest dreams will come true! Experience the luxurious future with the highest quality of living like never before.
Indulge in the ultimate shopping experience at Neo-Renaissance, the city's premier shopping center. Also affectionately called NeoReni by locals, find all the highest quality goods here at an affordable and fair price. Experience old-world charm or travel through the galaxy with our fully interactable hologram rooms. From fashionable clothing boutiques to avant-garde home decor stores, NeoReni offers everything you desire. If you’re here for a body modification, head downstairs to our one of a kind cybernetic lab, where you get customized implants by experienced professionals at your convenience. Light your night up within the nightlife: Astral Nova, a place of electric connections - literally.  Step into "The Scarlet Palace," an iconic nightclub that has become a world renowned legend in its own right. Lose yourself in its immersive atmosphere, where music, lights, and excitement combine to create an unforgettable experience. In Astral Nova, the night is yours to conquer and memories are waiting to be made. After a night of exhilaration, find solace in the embrace of the Skyline residential district. Nestled amidst the city's gleaming towers, Skyline offers a haven of tranquility and opulence. Find inner tranquility within your own sanctuary, where peace and privacy reign. Bask in the awe-inspiring views, take a dip in the rooftop infinity pool, or unwind in the serene gardens within each floor. Skyline is where luxury meets serenity, providing the perfect sanctuary to recharge and rejuvenate.
links : story intro post | mc intro | more
8 notes · View notes
a-mug-of-milk · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
some adverts for blood
2 notes · View notes
chalkrub · 10 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
my part of an art trade with @sourdeer ! love a shapeshifting space deity who is also a shameless corporate shill
362 notes · View notes
Text
should be illegal for the "x" to get rid of ads to be so FUCKING TINY
seriously though. especially when there's people with really shaky hands and eyesight issues and other conditions around. it's cruel
15 notes · View notes
frognungun · 2 months
Text
HEY LISTEN!!!
I want you!! do you have writing skills? do you like writing? are you a voice actor? artist? other? come join my team! we'll be happy to have you!
Tumblr media
5 notes · View notes
transpecter · 5 months
Note
HOT, SINGLE WEREWOLVES (ME) IN YOUR AREA! LOOKING TO FROT! HOWLING! AT THE MOON! AND ALSO.. YOUR DICK!
(clickclickclickclickclickclickclickcl)
2 notes · View notes
lesvieuxjoursart · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
13 notes · View notes
mejomonster · 9 months
Text
I started reading Billy Bat manga by Urasawa Naoki (u may know him as the guy who did Monster) and jesus christ its wild. Absolute experience. Judas and Jesus are in it, so are ninjas, so is lee harvey oswald (technically at least 3), theres a bat thats satire about how evil mickey mouse and disney are, there's lying cartoons galore, there's the civil rights movement, the oppressivr terror of the ku klux klan and the structural damage of segregation and fucked up laws, and the pervasiveness of advertising and the coca cola company ("golden cola") there's real events sprinkled with gratuitious fictional shit about manipulative God Billy Bat (or perhaps "administrator/guide to the human race"), a scroll that could control the world, Fake walt disney has hired killers, the looming brutality of imperialism and corporations buying out poorer areas, killing in other countries and breaking laws and whatever else is needed to acquire what they want, there's a cartoon dog kennedy assasination, a baby kevin inherits the powers of an older kevin, there's ninjas and priests, there's a small town out west full of cowboy larpers who are this comic artists biggest fan club, a secret agent Smith with a heart of gold (one hopes), a teenager named jackie whos seeing visions, there's a good and evil fake "mickey mouse" bat but frankly theyre probqbly both evil cause either way they lie and manipulate to get people to do what they want, judas cameos not only in his jesus arc but as a little kiddo, and like. Im not even halfway done. Einstein JUST showed up.
#rant#billy bat#its. an experience ill say that. its wild and im kind of floored it got published#it makes a lot of good points but its also ultimately a long winding Batshit Wild Bat Cartoon-as-God MYSTERY thriller#so its like. oh you learn about the pains of cowardice. the cruelties of corporations.#the way society doesnt value a whores life as you cry for her because she was wondetful. the way being just is hard#its hard to be brave and dangerous but it uas to be done. the vile dangers of advertizing and capitalism and profit over human life.#but then also. theres a fucking bat talking to a girl in her college class lol#its an interesting perspective in a way also cause like...#1 a lot of comic artists just full on would not touch these elements in their plots at all. and while ive seen these topics in stories#before. tjis is the most Pointed Disney/governments/corporations critique ive seen in comics. since like. its literally fake disney#ajd real ass historical figures and govts getting critiqued.#then 2 in japanese manga i havent seen foreign events covered much. and its interesting to see the perspective of#world events and america from this author. and his choice to make the protagonists who he did: a japanese american whos born american#and was in the allies as a translator. part of the US occupation when he initially visits japan.#the japanese mangaka whos older than ww2. the white upper class (truly upper class) coca cola#dynasty equivalent inheritor. a lower class black woman factory worker from florida whos outspoken and a leader and#braver than her husband. their kiddo kevin whos the most important person in the world worth saving. jackie the japanese american teen girl#eho grew up Loving fake disney and is in college. her dad the taxi driver who through other people#eventhally got the courage to go reunite with his wife and daughter jackie who left him.#(oh also a european priest and JUDAS and a ninja)#its just like. the author worked hard to put what feels like a japanese and american perspective and the Many ways those overlap and Dont#into this. as well as a variety of upper class and lower class characters. the rich fake walt disney and the poor bat town mayor and elder#who get killed for standing in the way of a corporations dreams.#jackie kennedy and the sweet girl who saved cartoonist Kevin and worked the street.#the rich dynasty inheritor of golden cola and his working class wife. how it all falls away in the deep soutj with pther lines#society draws. the poor student jackie versus the other protagonists witj a job#how kevin yamagata has not much connection to japan except a fondness for his parents. while jackie is even more#culturally removed (having never even visited japan) but her family still has their heritage of stories and places they miss and#want to visit and traditions her dad still regulalry discusses.
4 notes · View notes
kingjasnah · 2 years
Text
you know what the war on soonie pups has gone too far
20 notes · View notes
cruelsister-moved2 · 1 year
Text
i hate when you guys can only respond to stuff by anthropomorphising it I don't want to see another goofy poem about how that mars robot looked at the sky and was lonely or whatever im sorry... like its a little robot out in space is that not enough!!
6 notes · View notes
Text
!!!!!!
Tumblr media
4 notes · View notes
homeb0ys · 2 years
Note
HERE'S THE KEY QUESTION THO
can you explore homies room
I have my writing headcanons but I need more
Unfortunately not, believe me I tried! You can’t get inside any of the rooms sadly.
The only insight we have to his room is the BTS photo that Ant posted himself.
I’ve just spent the last while going through all the episodes of the three seasons to check for bonus content and was surprised that there were photos of Ant/Homie I hadn’t seen before. I’ll post them soon!
There’s also an extended scene of Homie’s speech at the Believe Expo, as well as an extended Dawn of the Seven clip with more Homie dialogue. But unfortunately the Prime Video app doesn’t let you screen record. I’m currently trying to figure a way round it since Amazon haven’t even uploaded the scenes themselves to their social media.
8 notes · View notes
imprvdente · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Fish Lecter & Fish Monet . Hunger Games AU . two very different victories featuring 𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐋 magazine
5 notes · View notes
lancrewizzard · 2 years
Text
I'm still absolutely reeling over how often MOTU characters end up in startlingly suggestive poses, and decided to try out my phone's new art app to bring the subtext of the show into just text. This is the first of hopefully many in the series I'm tentatively naming Gayskull.
Tumblr media
(from Colossor Awakes, Hunt for He-Man, and my own demented, queer little brain)
7 notes · View notes
shrenvents · 6 months
Text
Spellbound
Tumblr media
Warnings: Minors dni, smut, oral, cunnilingus, unprotected, fluff, some violence, biting
Pairing: Klaus Mikaelson x Witch reader
Summary: You're a witch with a specific skill set, one that has intrigued a certain hybrid.
Word count: 2.7k
...
Voodoo. Magic. Impulse. Obsession.
She was his newest fascination.
He heard her laughter cracking through the walls of the barren bar before it cut short. Klaus observed how the sunlight blazed across her, poorly parked, car. His lips slanted in mild amusement. He told himself, that’s all it was, all she was. Mild amusement for an immortal. Though, something felt different.
He strutted into the place, head hung high as he scanned the bare vicinity. His eyes halted on a man behind the bar, rinsing glass cups. The bartender's eyes adverted from Klaus, the second he caught his stare. The man's nerves were duly noted as Klaus approached him.
“I’ll have a glass of your finest red,” Klaus spoke artfully, with a fake smile plastered on his face. The worker shuddered. “Ug- we’re not serving right now.”
“No worries mate,” his mellifluous voice paused. “The red I fancy isn’t something I’d find on your menu.” The man's gaze shot up to Klaus’s. His lips trembled as Klaus continued his jest. “Unless you intend to provide me with a bite, I suggest you tell me where she’s hidden.” Klaus’s threat echoed through the building, till silence took its place.
Suddenly, the sound of a back door, opening and slamming shut jolted Klaus away from the bartender. He instantly raced to the door, ripping it open. He watched as her frame scattered into her rusted car. He growled. There was no way he'd let her escape once again...
Your body was convulsing with anxiety. Who were you to know a little magic truce with the “other side,” would have a certain hybrid on your front doorstep. It didn’t help when you levitated everything in your apartment at him, including your freshly made spaghetti with bolognese. It was to be expected, that would piss him off...
Yanking the car door shut, you forced the key in and started the engine.
“Where are we headed this time darling?”
“Ahhh!” You screamed, snapping your head to the uninvited passenger. Klaus sat leisurely beside you, and you swear your life flashed before your eyes. “I must say, I enjoyed our time in Chicago. Perhaps San Fran may be the next best thing, love.” His smug face adorned your features, absorbing the way your face contorted in both fear and frustration.
“Jesus,” you huff, and Klaus’s smirk grows. “As much as I love the idea, somehow becoming your personal chauffeur isn’t that appealing.” Klaus chuckles lowly, leaning in, more and more.
“Well, if you hadn’t decided to run off, you crafty little thing," he drawls sweetly, "We wouldn’t have the pleasure.”
“If you weren’t trying to kill me, maybe I’d stick around.” Klaus’s brows twist like he's appalled by your words. “Who said I was interested in killing you?”
“You- I- then, what do you want?” You stammer. Klaus went quiet. You watched as his expression goes blank, before he acts as though he was in deep thought. Then, his mouth gaped in 'awe,' as if the answer suddenly came to him. “Your talents of course.”
“My talents.” You repeat, baffled.
“Yes, do keep up, my dear.”
“Why? You could have any witch at your disposal, at a moment's notice.”
The corner of his lips elevate once more. “I’m flattered.”
He’s become so close now, you feel his breath, and you try not to shiver as it grazes your neck. He, on the other hand, basks in your scent.
“But, unlike my other witches, you have a gift,” he muses. “Your connection with the dead is something to behold, and something I crave.”
After a prolonged silence, you speak. “If I help you with whatever," you move further into your seat, "When it comes to an end, you’ll let me walk away, unscathed?” Your brow quirks, and with every fibre of your being, you manage to maintain eye contact. “Yes, you have my word.” Klaus’s expression went stoic, holding an unflinching seriousness that made your heart rate stutter. And strangely, you knew you could trust him.
That's how you ended up as his lackey. For the past 5 weeks, you were at his beck and call as he tormented humans, werewolves, and vampires alike.
Like any other day, your conscious is eating away at you, as you call upon another ancestor of those he plagues. Today though, you finally broke. He had been cruelly punishing a guy for hours, as you questioned his late brother through the veil.
“That’s enough!” Klaus’s eyes dart to yours, and his angry appearance softens. Instinctively, he grips your forearm and drags you out of the motel room.
“Love, what’s wrong?”
“What's wrong is that I’m tired, and his brother is telling me jack shit about those ‘hunters.’” You huff, closing your eyes.
Klaus firmly presses himself stock-still, resisting every urge that wishes to devour you, as you naively allow him to hold you so close, let your guard down, and close your eyes. Such an urge that has only worsened, and become insatiable since you started your venture together…
“Love, why don’t you grab a bite from the cafe across the street, while I fill up the car's tank?” He says heartfeltly, "That way we both can have a break."
Your eyes flutter open, and you nearly tremble at the gentle look that flickers in his gaze. However, his body language, which clutches you tightly, suggests he is anything but. “Okay.”
After five minutes alone in a booth, you gather up the last of the courage you were trying to dispel. Now, heading back to the rented room, to release the hostage. Stupid, very stupid, you think. But you can’t help it.
When you enter the room, the door slowly creaks shut, and shadows engulf you. It’s too quiet, and you can’t see the hostage. Unease fills your system, and you begin to regret this decision. That impending regret soon became alarms going off, when the captive grabs your torso, roughly caging your arms. His grip is inescapable, and when you try to scream, his free hand covers your mouth.
“You fucking bitch,” he murmurs with disgust, and you wince. “How about I leave you bleeding out here, all laid out for you bloodthirsty master.” The man crackles with humourless laughter. “I’m sure he’d appreciate that.”
While his venomous words made you cower, you relentlessly struggle against him, fighting with all that you could muster. Unfortunately, your captor was a werewolf, and far too strong for you to at least break free, to cast a spell.
He muffles Klaus’s name with his palm, and tears prick your eyes. Even after the numerous times you’d bicker and argue, he was still the first person who came to mind, who you hopelessly called out to.
The man began lifting your body towards the door, urgently turning the knob. Just as the outside light cuts into your vision, you're wrenched from him, pulled into a powerful embrace. With ease, Klaus’s arms carry you away, swiftly placing you in the backseat of your car, locked safely inside.
His figure then disappears just as quickly, and you hear your aggressor's voice wail in pain. Shaking, you curl over yourself, covering both ears pathetically.
After what feels like an eternity, two large hands cup your tear-stained cheeks, bringing you out of your shell. He quiets you, as he slides inside the vehicle, smoothly pulling you onto his lap. One of his arms supports your back, while the other strokes your hair. Calming you down, he mutters things like: 'Everything’s fine now love,' 'I’m here,' 'I’ll take care of you...'
“I’ve never felt so helpless,” you mumble.
He shakes his head. “There’s nothing you could've done to stop a werewolf, especially when a full moon draws near,” he soothes. You press your cheek further into his broad chest. “Though, I wish you would’ve just listened to me for once, and stayed put.”
You shoot your head up, adjusting to face him, close enough that your noses nearly meet. “If I listened to you, I’d probably be dead by now.”
“Oh really?” He grins, eyes creasing, “How so?”
“Well, for one, that time you ordered me to question that vampire chick's dead boyfriend about his affair, right in front of her.” Klaus guffaws. “You're laughing, but she would've bit my head off.”
“She wouldn’t have,” he denies, still chuckling.
“Yes, she would have Klaus.” You start to laugh too.
“You know, I wouldn’t have let her.” His face deadpans, “Like I didn’t let our were-friend hurt you," he voices, airily. "I gave you my word.”
“Yes, of course, your word.” You giggle nervously, glancing at the hand currently bracing your thigh, gliding its thumb back and forth. “It’s not all that I’ve given you.”
You look up and are met with a mysterious look this time. Your brows furrow in confusion. He smiles dreamily, “Your skills as a witch truly know no bounds.”
“The hell are you talking about now?” You retort, making Klaus laugh loudly.
“I’m talking about your spell," he whispers. "The one that has bewitched me.”
You freeze, heart dropping.
“You don’t mean that...” Your sentence trails off as Klaus stares through you.
He’s so unpredictable, that a part of you believes he's most likely playing some sick game. But, there was also a possibility that he meant it, and all the hidden desires, for your unconventional boss, were about to bubble to the surface.
“I've meant every word, from the moment I met you, when you got the better of me.” He smirks, breath fanning your face. “Witchcraft.”
Then his lips take yours, slow at first, but the entanglement shortly turns desperate. Slightly hesitant, you grind on him, eager to pull him closer. He groans, and his hands enthusiastically roam your waist and back, beckoning you nearer.
Moving in a frenzy, as your fingers tangle in his locks, you swing your leg to straddle him. He moans your name in between kisses, and palms your ass.
Continuously rolling your body into him, makes you feel his arousal, causing a whine to escape. When your lips break apart, his mouth runs down your jaw, to your neck. You gasp, but you don’t stop him. He audibly tells you how much he’s enjoying himself, and you squeeze your thighs over his.
“I can only imagine how sinful you taste here darling.” He remarks as his hand slides over your core, and you whimper. “How about you let me try?” He hums politely. “You know you want me to.”
“No,” you huff.
“No?” His voice rises questioningly, and a hand gropes your chest, while the other grips your chin, tilting your head down to peer into his eyes. “Not here,” you finish, and he smirks wildly.
“Then, I’ll just have to get us a private room?” He purrs seductively into you ear, making you shiver. “One that is, unoccupied,” he rolls his tongue, and you shiver again at the double meaning behind his words. You don’t even want to think about what he did to your assailant…
“Please,” you sigh into a kiss, pecking his lips, which seems to surprise Klaus momentarily. His surprise briskly turns into a beaming smile. “To be continued,” he utters before shifting you off him, and rushing out the car.
Not long after, Klaus reappears with that same childlike cheer gracing his features. Jerking the door open, he outstretches his hand like a gentleman. You accept it, and his palm completely envelops yours. He tugs you to his hip, and nibbles on your earlobe while you walk to a random room.
As soon as the door locks behind you, he presses himself against your backside. “Now, how about that taste?” He mutters while lifting your hair to kiss your nape, and rubbing himself against you. You press closer, before spinning around to enclose your mouth on his again. He groans into your mouth approvingly, backing your body toward the queen-size bed.
His lips free yours when your back legs hit the edge, and you fall backwards with a yelp. His hands soon make work of your lower half, removing your clothes as he kneels infront of your cunt. You inhale deeply, as cool air hits your bare body.
He goes silent, so you raise your head to peek at him. Klaus ogles you heatedly, like the predator he is. “Lovely,” he sing-songs.
He abruptly grips your thighs and heaves your core to his mouth, so close, his breath warms your skin. “K-Klaus.”
“Hmmm,” he hums shortly, before delving into you. You sob a cry of shock. His tongue expertly runs over your folds, sucking the nub with such a slow deliberation, like he can’t decide how he wishes to take you at first, as if he’s imagined every which way he could.
You whine, motioning him to make his choice, bucking up, feeling his stubble scratch you. Then he grows aggressive, hungrily lapping your clit, over and over, until he ushers out your orgasm.
When your lengthy climax finishes, he moves to sigh pleasantly into the crook of your neck. “You’re incredible,” he emits with a chant of your name, thoroughly relaxing your shaking form.
“Fuck, take off your clothes,” you beg. He immediately abides by your command, tearing off his shirt and pants. You grab his necklaces to haul his lips to yours. You savour every inch of yourself on his tongue, and he relishes in how dirty the act is.
“There’s only so much I can do before dawn, and it won't nearly be enough to satisfy my hunger for you.” His poetic words erupt something within. You exhale, “It seems you’re going to break your promise then.”
He stills at your words, befuddled. You elaborate, “There’s no way I’m coming out of this unscathed.” A timid smile spreads across your face, and he almost nods in understanding, feeling a strange quiver in his chest.
Wordlessly, he pulls himself from his slacks, and you take off the last of your clothes. Suddenly feeling a little out of body, you decide to take back some control of the situation. So, you flip your positions, once again, surprising Klaus, though he allows it.
You straddle him, and lower yourself onto his thick cock. You whimper the second the tip enters, and he growls, pressing his fingertips into your hips, definitely leaving bruises.
“You’re too big,” you gasp.
“You can handle it, sweetheart,” he states mindlessly. He wraps his arms around your waist and arms, pulling you down onto him. His hips press completely into you, pushing himself inside to the hilt. A wheeze leaves your lungs as he grounds into you. “Klaus, it’s too-“
“It’s perfect,” he finishes for you. You barely have any time to adapt to his size before he begins pounding. Pleasure wracks through you, and he takes whatever control you had away. His pace is unnerving, and you utter incoherent words, while his fangs graze your neck.
“Tell me,” he groans through his panting. “Tell me you want me.” He demands, though it almost sounds like he’s begging for it. “I-I want you.” The words stumble out as his thrusts reach your center.
“More,” he just about whines.
“I want you Klaus,” you shout. “You feel so good- fuck I’ve always wanted this, you.” You ramble, egged on by him. He loves it, and you feel it in his strength. He holds you tighter, and the air abandons your body.
Feeling his leg tremble, you know he’s close. “Bite me.” His clamped-shut eyelids pop open, and his dark pupils bore into yours. You kiss him, and take his bottom lip between your teeth. “Bite me while you cum,” you command.
He gulps before taking his last few pumps into you. He moans into your neck as his teeth puncture your flesh. You cry out at the mixture of pain and pleasure that shatters you both.
After almost 10 minutes, he releases you from his firm caress and kisses the holes in your neck.
Still inside, he turns you both on your sides. You catch your breath. “How are you still hard?” You sigh in exasperation, and he chuckles breezily. “I told you, you’ve bewitched my very soul darling.” He smirks.
“This is only the beginning.”
4K notes · View notes