#feel like i wanted to say something else but i'm literally so tired i forgot

[vegancas]

alright i have one more post after this before i hit post limit. i slept like 3 hours (my fault i guess bcos i stayed up sooooo late), and i need to have something to eat!! but if i can't wait the next hourish before i can post again then i'll be over at @vegancasifer

[playgrl0]

thoughts that i have about baji

that's my baby bruh😭

⁂ i feel like if you know me, you already know what i'm gonna say first:

⁂ baji BITES. he bites you whenever he can and he does it all over your body. he doesn't do it in public since you don't want that and he respects it. but behind closed doors? he bites every part of your body and he doesn't give a fuck. the public eye will see the bite marks he left though.

⁂ his favorite parts to bite you are your neck, your thighs (especially inner thighs) and breasts.

⁂ neck kisses. so so many fucking neck kisses.

⁂ he always holds your throat🫨 when you guys kiss. he doesn't squeeze it or anything, he just holds it instead of placing his hand on your cheek for example.

⁂ forgot to mention that he also loves when you bite him. do it do it do it. don't be shy!!

⁂ he loves when you brush his hair for him. he will walk up to you and hand you his brush without a word and you brush it for him. he thanks you by pecking your cheek and disappears again

⁂ he can get extremely clingy when he's tired or stressed out

⁂ tries to act tough on your wedding day but will literally burst into tears once he sees you. chifuyu hands him a tissue and laughs at him. "shut up, man." he sniffles and wipes his tears away.

⁂ calls you baby, babe, angel, mama or comes up with a silly nickname himself

⁂ if you're not sitting on his lap you're doing something wrong like, why sit on a chair, on the couch, on the floor, literally anywhere when his lap is RIGHT THERE??

⁂ he tackles you randomly, gets up again, walks away and acts like he didn't do anything.

⁂ a tease. a fucking tease. loves making you nervous.

⁂ he is so so loyal. would never even come close to the thought of cheating on you. he would never.

⁂ when girls hit on him, he literally ignores them. if they keep being pushy he tells them to leave him tf alone because he already has a girl. they could never compare to you anyway.

⁂ he definitely has a staring problem. he stares at you all the damn time, not matter how you look like or what you're doing. big fan of eye contact.

⁂ he's always horny

⁂ very protective. he doesn't play around when it comes to you

⁂ ppl say he takes good care of his hair but i disagree. personally, i think he uses 4 in one shampoo and that's it i think he's just blessed with good genes. or his mama forces him to take care of it lmao idk

⁂ he's obsessed with your ass. doesn't matter if you have a small one or a whole wagon, he loves your ass. he uses it as pillow or drums. he slaps it when walking past you. one hand is always on it.

⁂ forgot to mention that he also bites your ass heheheh.

⁂ likeee you're laying on your bed on your stomach wearing shorts. baji jumps on the bed between your legs and his hands travel from the back of your thighs, up to your ass below your shorts. his big, warm hands resting on your cheeks, squeezing them before he leans forward and bites each cheek to leave a bite mark

⁂ you flinch at the contact and push him away, he just grins at you, slaps your ass and then lays down to take a nap on your ass yeah yeah

⁂ has no concept of personal space. your personal space is his.

⁂ makes fun of you all the time but if someone else dares to make fun of you they're dead. nobody is allowed to bully you except for him

⁂ i see him with a tongue piercing, eyebrow piercing, helix piercings and one nipple piercing

⁂ and many, many tattoos 🫨

⁂ tough on the outside but definitely the absolute biggest softie on the inside

⁂ you'll definitely own at least two cats together. maybe even three.

⁂ if he falls in love with you, he'll never love anyone else after you. he loves hard. you're his one and only, his entire world. you two are endgame.

⁂ he's a slut.

that's all for now,,,, bye

tags: @shamelessperfectionhideout @vmlnrz @saintokkotsu @satanlovesusall666 @kiirsteinn @noritopia @gothamgurl2024 @ranscutedoll @bertholdts--butt @torakeii

<3 @ playgrl0

[titanelite22]

The Coffin Of Andy And Leyley Progress report 9

TW// Mentions Of Abuse

• Interesting to see that we'll get to play as Julia in the future episodes. Julia is the one thing that helps Andrew feel and look "normal," so any cracks under the surface will be really obvious when they're presented while playing as Julia.

• ANDREW IS NOT INNOCENT ‼️ Yes, Ashley has fucked him up, but she's only half the reason. This guy did not give a FUCK about Julia telling him that she was receiving explicit and graphic threatening voicemails. Like, dude, that's your GIRLFRIEND... He didn't even offer to call the police or anything...

• We need to see more of how Julia and Andy act around each other, but the whole snapping because she's asking valid questions? It feels so controlling in the sense that now that he's snapped at her like this, she's probably gonna be afraid to bring this conversation up again in the future. She'll probably be afraid to say something he won't like or disagree with him as well.

And if she DOES bring it up again, he's gonna snap again, and she'll immediately bend and apologise to him. It's a cycle. The last text reads, 'You forgot what you wanted to talk to him about'. That's the goal. He's gonna react like that everything she brings it up. Also, the casual language ("Nah", all the sighing, his facial expressions), saying things like "is that it?". It's so demeaning.

• Ah, yes, the high school rumours were incest rumours as we expected. I wonder how they (mainly Ashley lol) acted around everyone else for these rumours to even start.

• A lot of people picked up on this, and I'm glad I wasn't the only one - What Andrew said at the end? Those are literally the things he would say to Ashley. "Nothing will ever fustrate me like you do," "I'll forgive you for everything and for anything." He's literally talking to Julia like she's Ashley... Even the way he hugs Julia is similar to how he hugs Ashley.

TLDR;

• Nemlei got tired of people victimising Andrew lol

[moonstruckme]

Hi my love. Can you do a quick little blurby with whoever you think will fit this. The request is the reader was literally forgotten by her coworkers. They were all going to go out after work but they forgot her and went out without her. Just a comfort fic because this literally happened to me and I want to curl up and cry

Hi my love, I'm so sorry that this happened to you but I really hope things have been sorted out and/or you're feeling better now. Thank you for requesting sweetheart <3

Steve Harrington x fem!reader ♡ 957 words

Steve wonders if maybe he’s holding you too tight. He’s got one arm around your ribcage and the other curled over your shoulders so he can hold the nape of your neck, but he keeps having to squash bouts of his own indignant fury to focus on comforting you. 

Unfortunately, this is not something he can handle with a bat. 

“I’m sure they didn’t mean to,” he mumbles next to your head. Your cheek is pressed close to his, your arms hung loosely around his shoulders. You’d come home to find him on the couch and simply draped yourself over him, desperate for affection he was all too happy to give you, even if it’s a bit less fun and games when you’re upset. You’re not even really crying, just clinging to him as a slow, relentless stream of tears flows out of you. 

“I know.” You sound so dejected Steve feels like someone’s taken the bat to him, your voice croaky and tired. “I don’t think they were trying to be mean, they just…didn’t remember me.” 

“Being inconsiderate still makes them a bunch of douchebags,” he says, thumb stroking the baby hairs on your neck. 

Steve likes to think he was never that much of a douchebag, but witnesses would probably testify otherwise. Robin would gleefully skip to the front of the line. She’d actually referred to his past self as a douche-canoe once. Steve isn’t sure what exactly that means, but he’s guessing it didn’t make him a whole lot better than these guys. 

“You should come work with me and Robs,” he offers, only half joking. You normally love your job, but he hates seeing you like this enough to think that maybe that doesn’t matter so much. “The pay’s worse, but we’re way more fun to be around.” 

You sniffle, tightening your grip around his shoulders affectionately. “Thanks, Stevie. But it’s not that I don’t like them. They’re cool, usually.” Steve makes a reluctant grunting sound, though he knows this to be true. Prior to today’s incident, he’d actually been looking forward to meeting some of them. “I just wish I weren’t so forgettable.” 

It takes Steve a second to actually process what you’ve said, and then his heart sputters in his chest. “Hey, what?” He pulls away from you, curling his hands around your upper arms. “Babe, this hasn’t got anything to do with you.” 

The look in your eyes is less despair than resignation. You seem almost sorry to contradict him. “It’s not like they didn’t invite me. They were trying to be nice, they just didn’t notice that I wasn’t there when they left. What else do you call that?” 

“Not your fault,” he insists, nose scrunching bewilderedly as he shakes his head at you. “That’s what I call it. Listen, I” —he sighs— “I don’t want to sound like I’m advocating for these assholes, but you know how things can get when you’re in a group like that. Everybody’s all excited about whatever you’re all going to do, and if somebody says they’re ready to go, you go. They were probably each thinking you were with someone else. Actually, I can almost guarantee they weren’t thinking at all.” 

Your mouth pulls to one side, dissatisfied but considering. You give a little shrug. “I guess.” But you’re just appeasing him, Steve can tell. 

Fuck, he hates talking about this. The things he does for you, he swears. 

“Look, I was an asshole kid once too,” he says, and he’s aiming for lightness but he can tell by the way your eyes lock on his that you know the significance of him bringing this up. It’s not a legacy he’s proud of. “I could…okay, I’m not happy about it, but I could kind of see myself doing something like that a few years ago. I was an idiot, right? We agree?”

Almost despite yourself, you give a little smile. Steve goes on, encouraged. 

“So I can say, practically from experience, that I wouldn’t have been thinking about who was there and who wasn’t. I would’ve been too caught up in the idea of what we were doing to pay attention. But that just makes me a dick, it doesn’t mean anything about you.” 

You tilt your head, giving him one of those thoughtful, open looks he loves so much. He likes it when you let him see all of you on your face. Makes his boyfriend duties a lot easier. “You’re not a dick,” you say softly. 

“I was,” he says, and it’s not hard to admit when you’re here in front of him, living proof that he’s got to be doing something right these days. He rubs your upper arms roughly. “But you’re not forgettable.” 

You sniff again. Steve is pleased to note that your tear ducts seem to have emptied their reserves enough for the time being. He’s not sure whether that’s because you believe him or because you’re just choosing to let his affection outweigh your coworkers’ callousness for the evening, but either is alright with him. He can love you enough to make up for all of those fuckers. 

“Can I hug you again?” you ask, and he’s quick to oblige you, slotting you back between his arms where you belong. 

“When you go back to work, I bet they’re all going to feel really bad,” Steve grumbles, letting his grip tighten slightly around your ribcage. “But if you want to just avoid all that, the option to come work at Family Video is still open. I know a guy.” 

Your laugh is croaky but real, and the sound of it makes Steve want to squeeze the life out of you for happiness. “I’ll think about it.” 

[7ndipity]

Dating Jin headcanons

Seokjin x Reader

Warnings: swearing, teeny bit suggestive

A/N: More headcanons because they're fun and I can't sleep🤷. Working on these lists is making me so soft for the members all over again, it's crazy. Anyway, hope you like them!

Masterlist

Requests are open

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Dating Jin is like dating your best friend.

Cause, I mean, you basically are.

He is a hopeless romantic, in every sense of the phrase.

A Classic Gentleman. Opens doors for you, holds your hand on the stairs, shows up for your first date in a suit with bouquet of flowers(even though your just going to the fair or smth)

So awkward when you first start dating, his ears probably stayed red for a solid three weeks.

Does that blushy, flustered laugh thing anytime you complement him. Like yeah, he knows he's Mr.WWH, but hearing it from you just hits different, man.

He admitted before to getting so lost in daydreaming about his future s/o that he's burned food, and I think that would still happen(hopefully to a less severe degree) now that he has you.

Like, you'll be talking about something and look over at him, and he just has that distant look in his eyes. And you're like "Hello?" And he just blurts out something like "We should get a cat." "What?!"

You've heard his dad jokes, now get ready for the cheesiest, cringiest pick-up lines ever.

"I'm not a photographer, but I can picture me & you together." "Please stop." "Are you from Paris? Because Eiffel for you." "That doesn't even make sense!"

His flirt game is actually pretty good tho, he's just so nonchalant about it, that it tends to catch you off guard.

You:*walks in room* Him: "Wow." You:"What?" Him:"I just forgot how gorgeous you were."

Likes taking you on fancy dates, but usually prefers cozier, lowkey dates with you.

Like, one day he'll take you to the nicest restaurant in town, the next, he's dragging your ass to some lake to go fishing.

Cooking dates that start out pretty cute and sweet, but become increasingly unhinged as time goes on(there's a korean youtube channel TryToEat, that I swear is what he would be like)

Calls you things like 'Jagi' and 'Honey', as well as more weird, Jin-esque names like 'Bubble'(he thinks it's cute, just go with it)

Couples outfits that range from matching sweatsuits to those t-shirts that say "if found, please return to Jin" & "I'm Jin".(He claims it's for safety reasons because what if he loses you at the mall or smth?)

Y'all pick on each other constantly.

"You look like a Pokémon." "Big talk for someone built like fucking Dorito."

Like, you've seen him with Jungkook, he's a menace. But now, he's your menace. (Imma pray for you)

But he's the only one allowed to pick on you. Anyone else who tries is in for the cussing out of a lifetime.

House Husband Vibes.

Takes pride in looking after you, whether that's taking care of you when you're sick, or just making dinner on a random Wednesday. It makes him feel needed.

Speaks as if you're already married.

"Think about the kids." "What kids?!" "The cats!" "We don't have cats yet!" "Aha, yet! So we are going have some eventually!"

Has the tendency to finish every conversation by giving you a lil smooch. (Doesn't matter if he was talking to you or someone else, you're getting kisses)

Needy

Literally hangs off of you whenever he's tired or wants attention.

Long, drawn out kisses where he backs you against the wall or counter that can make you forget about anything else other than him.

Likes to lay on you rather than with you. Like, you are his favorite pillow, and he will whine if you don't let him have his pillow time, cause he's a dramatic mf.

"AGH, Y/N-AH LOVES ME NOT! HOW WILL I GO ON?!

The other members don't call him the actual maknae for no reason, he's kinda baby.

You're one of the only people who get to see his more serious sides though, however brief their appearances may be.

Argues with you over the dumbest shit, but avoids actually fighting with you like a plague.

Overall, he's very sweet though and would do anything for you. Idk, he's just so, 💞ugh, yeah Imma go now.

[mentallyillstinker]

WHOOOOO YEAHH!!!

Dating Benny headcannons NSFW EDITION!!!

YAAAYYYY (Price is right music plays)

(It's under the cut, obvi, holy shit wait did i put too much? 😭)

Let's get this out of the way real quick, he DOES NOT, repeat, DOES NOT! want a family, he would say it's because he doesn't have time for it or something but really he just wouldn't want to raise kids out in the wasteland. Though he is yknow rich and all that fun stuff, he's still worried.

If ur a guy you don't have to worry about that stuff, unless you want to like, adopt a kid, which I don't think you'd be able to do in the wasteland, unless you literally just go out and take orphans from the side of the road, which I'm sure there probably are.

Back onto the sexy stuff 😘

He's definitely a bottom. I mean, he's a switch rlly, but he probably got tired of all of the prostitutes just letting him do whatever he wants basically. ALSO WHILE ON THE TOPIC OF PROSTITUTES I HOPE THE DOCTORS IN NEW VEGAS KNOW WHAT STDS ARE.

Back on to Benny, sorry I got distracted 😭

He loves hearing you moan, I mean, as long as it's real, he's so used to hearing fake moans that yours sound like music to his ears.

He's also very vocal. He doesn't really care what other people think if he hears him.

He loves loves LOVES when you pull his hair, or like, just be rough with him, in the end he knows you love him.(Awwww)

If he's on top he'll be as gentle as he can be, he knows you can handle more but he just waits until you tell him to be more rough, even then he won't be really.

He just loves putting his hands on you all the time, so obviously expect him to do that when you're fucking, oh wait, ur bouncing on his dick rn? His hands are busy gently holding onto ur waist.

While we're talking about his hands, I just wanna say he has big hands. And I mean, they wouldn't really be calloused because of how he treats himself now. (He treats himself like a pretty little princess)

His eyes will most likely be on you the whole time, he has this like dazed look in his eyes, he's just admiring you don't worry babes 😘. Though his eyes will most likely be on your face. He always wants to make sure you're enjoying yourself.

Benny is not a great kisser, just wanted to say that, it's not really NSFW, but he's a mediocre kisser, he doesn't really kiss prostitutes, and even then it was like a weird French kiss that Benny never knew was coming so he kinda just sat there for a second before he was like, 'oh shit, wait' and tried his best to kiss back.

He will kiss all over ur body though, he loves pampering you and just making you feel loved. Like I mentioned before, he would have to have fell for you HARD if you ended up dating.

He likes to hold your hands when you fuck, I mean, he tries to most of the time, but your hands are too busy doing anything else.

He has a thing for being praised, at first he'd be upset if you called him a good boy, he'd think your calling him a dog or something, but eventually he was like 'hey, I really like that' and would go out of his way to get praised.

He likes thighs, well, he likes it ALL! RAHHHHH!!! but if he's like giving you head his hands will be GRIPPED on ur thighs the whole time.

Like I said he's very vocal, but surprisingly he doesn't just moan like a bitch the whole time, he actually tires to tell you how much he loves you or how good you feel, but most of it is just quiet and breathy and most of the time gets cut off by him moaning or just yelling out fuck.

IDK WHAT ELSE TO PUTTT UGHHHB! At this point I might as well just write a small little story, I mean a oneshot 😭 I forgot what it was called for a second.

[tua-five]

Season 2 Episode 10

Today's episode starts off sad. A painful reminder that Ben is gone.

Reginald was cruel enough to blame it on the kids, but at least had the decency to let them have the day off.

I also love it shows that each and every one of them affected the timeline. Even Klaus. How he was named and knew the connection (probably through last name), I don't know. And of course, they think Five was being held hostage and then Five says he does feel like it sometimes.

Which brings another thing to attention. The news specified "hostage" not kidnapped. Kidnapped requires moving the victim, whereas hostage does not. However, that has nothing to do with my point. Hostage also requires the attention of a 3rd party. So they believed that they held Five hostage in order to do something or get something. What exactly did they think that was? I really want to know how far the conspiracy theorists went.

The siblings all had a lot of balls to tell [Viktor] that they won't help [him] and Harlan. For the first time, [he's] asking for help. Admitting that [he's] scared. And they tell [him] they have other priorities. They tell the one who literally keeps ending the world no. Good choice. Also, little do they know that it literally WILL be their priority in just a few measly hours. They make up for it by all joining in the car. That was really sweet.

And wow, I forgot that Ben told [Viktor] to tell Klaus that he was too scared to go into the light. That it wasn't his fault. I almost started crying again.

The only thing I can think of, is Diego should've shut his dang mouth. I mean, I know it would've happened anyway, but still. Diego saying there's 7 of the siblings and 2 of them. Oh yeah, you're right. See what I can do? Boom. A billion commissioners. Idiot.

I am proud of Diego, however, with the bullets. He's never done anything like that (assumably), and it's a lot at once, too. He did it to save his dumb brother that everyone believes got themselves into this mess.

There's a lot going on here, and I'm writing as I watch, so it's a little difficult to find the words to voice my thoughts on this. I'll try my best.

[Viktor] being able to calm Harlan, being able to go into the little bubble that was created, is impressive. It might not seem like it, but it actually really is. That I'd such a huge energy force. Anyone else would probably be dead.

Lila being able to mimic everyone's powers is way too overpowered. And somehow, without practice with any of the powers, she's already stronger and can master them. Despite Five being too tired to blink, Lila was still able to.

Klaus being about to hit the ground, but being caught by ghosts. Another show of his powers and how great they can be.

And of course, Five being the dumbest most idiotic person and pushing a 300-pound Luther out of the way of falling bricks. Luther literally survived a chandelier being dropped on him without a scratch. However, I do know that Five doesn't truly know that, so fine. But still. His love for his siblings makes him dumb.

Another thing about Five. He was too tired to blink with Diego, but then he goes and fights Lila, blinking around the room. There's 2 logical reasons he's able to do this. 1 being, he's had enough rest that he isn't tired anymore (though 2 minutes barely feels like enough time), or 2, he's running on adrenaline now. Out of fear. For himself and his family. He sees Allison dying, thought Luther was going to die (supposedly) by the bricks, etc. He's mad and confused, and he's afraid. He won't admit it, but he is. I'd like to believe it's the latter. That he's running on adrenaline. It just makes more sense.

Okay, hold on..

It seems I have remembered things wrong..?

The siblings are just now figuring out that Lila is "one of them". Klaus says, "Eh, but there were only 7 of us." Somenwhere somehow, my brain went to the hargreeves siblings knows that they are 7 of 43 gifted children born on the 1st of October 1989 from women who were not pregnant when the day began. I assumed that Reginald Hargreeves told them so. However, here, the siblings say that he never told the full truth. That they should consider the possibility of there being more of them out there. Meaning they didn't know about the other 36 children.

I went back to the first episode. To rewatch Sir Reginald's speech after the bank heist. And he says, "Our world is changing. Has changed. There are some among us lifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary. I have adopted six such children. I give you the inaugural class of The Umbrella Academy." So here, he hints that there are more "powered" people out there. However, the siblings now seem to not know that. So Reginald, either gaslit them, and/or they blocked that out. They're kids, so right now, all they're thinking about is the hundreds of people in front of them. The news cameras. The people they just saved and those they killed. The victory of their assumed first mission.

Can we talk about the amazing lines in just 30 seconds?

Luther saying "Love shouldn't hurt this much." Diego saying "I know what it's like to love dangerous people. Difference is... they love me back." Him saying that they can be her family if she let's them. Lila pausing to look at the others, and they all smile at her!! Like they truly will!!?

And then, dang, I did not remember The Handler just killing everyone so quick.

What's so sweet is Lila saying, "They're my real family." To the one she's called mom for so long. She's calling them family after she just tried killing all of them.

It's also sad how I'm sure Five is using his very last energy to go back in time. "Seconds. Not decades." He's dying, a gun pointed st his face, and his father's words echo in his head. And he uses that.

So much can change in a matter of seconds.

He saves his family with the last ounce of hope and will he has. Successfully.

Oh, and may I just say. With how accident prone and apocalypse prone, the siblings are, they should've known to take an extra briefcase. Just in case, ya know?

Cause yeah. "Shit" is right.

Gif collection!

[str4wberryfo4m]

My Universe (Xu Minghao)

“... may you find the serenity that my presence couldn't give to you.”

pairing: minghao x gn!reader

genre: angst, lovers to exes

summary: he’s tired of hurting you and decides that it’s best if he leaves, not knowing that will hurt you more.

warning: cursing

wc: 1.2k

“Y/n, please. Let me go,” he said softly, almost sounding like a murmur. You remained silent as you stared back into his eyes, hoping against hope for a glimpse of affection. You’re not holding him, as much as you wanted to, so you know he meant it literally. “I can’t, Hao. I want to fight for us. It’s okay if you can’t. Just… Just let me try to be strong for both of us,” you took a step forward, reaching out to hold his hand, just for him to step back. “Don’t touch me, you’re making it harder than how it should be, Y/n,” it sounds harsher than what he intended, seeing how your expression became more hurt, he felt like he was punched in the gut. “I want the best for us, Y/n. I can’t keep hurting you. Hurting us. I’m letting you go so you’d be happy,” his eyes were fixed on the floor, hoping you won’t notice his vulnerability.

“Hao, did I do something that hurt you? Please tell me so that I can fix it. Please, my love… We promised to hold tight and never let go, no matter what. I…” the words spilling from you are now incoherent, and you’re not stopping, desperately wanting Minghao to understand how badly you wanted this to work. “I’m the one who hurt you. And those fucking hurts. You can’t keep on pretending just to protect this relationship. You can’t keep on hurting yourself and your feelings, and act like everything is fine just because you wanted to take care of mine!” he shouted, but his tired eyes were different from before, not from rage, but from guilt. “I’ll stop doing that, I’ll be more open about what I feel, so let’s go home and…” you keep on saying things that Minghao can’t even comprehend because he can’t take it. He just stares at how shattered you are while trying hard not to embrace you. Once again, he made the love of his life brokenhearted. “Y/n,” he called, yet you still don’t stop talking. “Y/n.” he repeated, this time a bit louder, snapping you back to the current situation. Not knowing when, Minghao is standing right in front of you. You’re holding back from touching him, not wanting him to distance himself again.

“I hate it when you call me by my name,” because you love it when he calls you sweet names, ‘baby’, ‘love’, and… ‘my universe’. You feel so distant whenever he calls you by your name, and not even a nickname, just purely your name. He hesitated before speaking up again, “I believe that you’ll find someone better-” “Fuck that, Hao. What the fuck with hoping I’ll end up with someone else when I only want you? You’re making me feel like… you don’t want me,” the way your heart clenched while saying it makes your head dizzy. “Do you think I'm letting you go because I don't love you? I love you more than what you could imagine. I just can't offer you the genuine happiness I wanted you to have. Can't you see? I'm pure poison to you,” you tried to hold his hand once again, and surprisingly, he let you. “You're never poison to me, my love. You’ll always be my escape, my medicine, my solution, and my home.” Your eyes move from staring into his eyes to your linked hands when you feel him tightening them. “You’re lying to yourself again. You’ll find comfort and warmth from someone who deserves you,” upon hearing this, you can’t even raise your head, “You deserve me, Hao. Even if you think there’s someone who can give more than you, why can't you be the person? Why can’t you be my person?” and that’s when you feel droplets. It’s raining.

“You’re so blinded by what you choose to believe. I’m hurting you.” his firm voice turns shaky. You hate how this makes you feel. He’s the one who’s blinded. You feel like he focuses too much on the dark side that he forgot to even realise there’s bright side too. “Hao, do you not love me as much as you always say?” and he answered exactly what you expected, “That’s what you don’t understand. I’m letting you go because I love you so much. This is the best. For you, Y/n.”

This is not fair. Who is he to decide what’s best for you? And the worst is, it’s not even a good decision! You love him so much and you’re willing to do anything. For him, for the sake of both of you. But why is he leaving? Why does he think that is the best solution, and ironically, he claimed it’s for you, when you never even thought of leaving him once. “I think I can decide on my own, Hao. If you’re bad for me, I’d leave you willingly, without you telling me to. I don’t know. I hate the fact that I really feel like you’re leaving me for your own sake,” with shaky breath, you continued, “It’s okay. I love you so much. If this is the best for you, I’ll accept it. I’m so sorry. I’m so…” the words can’t escape your mouth. It’s raining, you both are crying while holding hands, but from your perspective, you thought it was droplets of rain on his face, because Minghao remained expressionless, hoping this will make it easier for you to hate him, though what he doesn’t realise; you’ll never hate him, no matter what he did.

From Minghao’s perspective, he’s trying so hard not to embrace you. Even holding your hand was out of his control, because he promised to himself not to make this hard for himself and most importantly, you. “It’s not your fault, Y/n. It never will. I’m the problem here. I hurt you a lot, so I’ll put an end to your pain.” you smiled weakly, and you disentangled your fingers, and funny enough, you swear that his hand hesitant to let go. “Hao, you don’t need to explain. Like I said, I’ll accept it. It’s okay. But promise me, please. Be happy. Find yourself again. Take care of yourself, I love you so much, Hao. May you find the serenity that my presence couldn’t give to you.” Letting him go was never what you wanted. You were going to persuade him that you’ll fight for both of you. But you slowly understand that he needed this. He needed to put an end to his pain. You didn’t even want to hear his response, too afraid that you’ll be selfish again, by asking him to stay when he decided that he wanted to leave. Maybe it is the best for you. Or maybe, you’re just validating everything that he did to you, because you really love him, and you know at some point, he loved you too. When you disappeared from his sight, that’s when he replied,

“You’re the only serenity I need. I’m sorry I need to do this. Please hate me, please never call and say you miss me. I’m afraid I’ll pick up. I love you so much more, my universe.”

[nrc-research-club]

driver’s license

↬ Summary: In which you finally get your driver's license and offer a ride to the guys. It goes as well as you can imagine.

↬ Characters: Jamil Viper, Jade Leech

↬ Tags: fluff, bit of crack

↬ Notes: i am back!! from a very long hiatus!! i also have another side blog for another fandom now haha so that made me think of writing something for here. also on a side note.. should i open ko-fi or something similar for those who want to commission when requests are closed? let me know in an ask or a reply or literally anywhere haha

Jamil Viper

↬ When you tell Jamil that you've finally gotten your license, he feels, at the very least, proud. Driving is hard no matter how you look at it, and getting a license is just proof of how much you've practiced earning one. He gives you reminders such as to never drink and drive or to always take a break if you feel like you're too tired to drive.

↬ He's quite confident in you, so when you ask him if he wants to join you for a ride, he thinks of how to leave Kalim in someone's care for a while before saying yes. His family would kill him for this, but Kalim would kill everyone in the car if he were to join.

↬ With Kalim out of the way and you being super enthusiastic about driving, the two of you get in the car with high hopes. You've planned on driving around town to do some errands, but the moment you start your car, it makes a weird noise that drains the color from Jamil's face.

↬ "Hey," he says after a long pause, getting nervous and rechecking his seatbelt. You still have a smile on your face, but it doesn't ease his worries one bit. "That doesn't sound good—"

↬ The car jerks forward before moving again, and he swore he got whiplash and a heart attack from it. Your engine sounds like it's dying, making whirring noises that definitely sounded wrong.

↬ "It's okay!" you say as you step on the gas. The car whirs and buzzes as the speedometer rises (along with Jamil's blood pressure), and then realization dawns on you. "Oh! I forgot to change my gear. Hold on."

↬ As you take one hand off the steering wheel, the car starts moving to the side. Jamil snaps, holding onto his seat for dear life as he watches his life flash in front of him. Maybe this was good since it would free him from his duties, and yet… dying in a car crash seems too terrible, even for him.

↬ "What are you doing!?" he asks when you accidentally turn your headlights on instead of making a signal. A car from behind you honks its horn, but you pay it no mind as you make a turn and activate the signal at the very last moment. It's a wonder you haven't gotten pulled over yet.

↬ "Just relax! See, let's park right there," you say, briefly gesturing to a spot sandwiched between two, very expensive-looking cars. Jamil glances between you and the cars, sighing in disbelief as he unbuckles his seatbelt.

↬ "Get out," he says, already halfway through the door. The last thing he needs is to pay for damages when you inevitably crash into those cars. "I'm going to be the one driving from now on."

Jade Leech

↬ Jade is very supportive from the start, his carefully practiced expression dismissing any of your initial concerns. Little do you know there are pads, a helmet, and a first aid kit in his bag, just in case the two of you needed it even before you arrived at the campsite. He observes you as you start the car, noting how you checked the mirrors and seatbelts first before anything else. Good.

↬ It's a long drive ahead, so he's resigned himself to keeping you alert so you don't fall asleep. After all, you're the only one with a license between the two of them, because driving with his new legs is a little too complicated for Jade yet.

↬ The drive starts out fairly fine. He has never heard that many suspicious noises in the span of a few minutes in his lifetime, but he chalks it up to your relative inexperience. No one starts out perfect at driving, especially with how difficult it is in the first place.

↬ He would've applauded you for even getting to the freeways without crashing into anyone yet if it weren't for your personality change midway. You start spewing out insults, pressing on the gas to overtake some poor grandmother who was in the wrong lane. If he hadn't known you for some time, he would've been… scared.

↬ "Yeah, get your ass off the highway if you can't keep up with the minimum speed limit," you spit as you get back to your original lane. Jade retains the calm facade on his face, but he's already thinking if he should force you into pulling over and calming down soon.

↬ "My dear," he starts out, one hand in his backpack in case he already needs to take the helmet out. "Shouldn't you exercise more patience? You are a new driver yourself, after all."

↬ "Nah," you say, swerving as another slow car blocks your way. Jade is sure you're breaking so, so many laws right now. "Oh hey, that's our exit. Crap, I'm not in the outer lane right now."

↬ After narrowly missing your exit and decreasing Jade's lifespan by at least a few years, the two of you are finally at the base of the mountain you decided on camping at. Jade's legs shake as he gets out of the car, threatening to give up as he attempts to walk over to your side.

↬ With a gentle, yet firm hand on your shoulder, he gives you his signature smile before saying, "Let us take the mirror next time, shall we?"

[p1xiemeat]

ive been living with sensory issues my whole life, i freak out when someone makes small changes to my routine, like i hate doing spontaneous things, most of the time i hate physical affection, & i have such a hard time socializing & making friends. i have bipolar disorder and other disorders like anxiety, etc. but my treatment for those things doesn't help with these other issues i have. i hate being like this and i want to work toward change but i don't know what to do to work toward it. 😞

like i said i have trouble making friends and i always have since i was a kid. i've always felt like an alien compared to other ppl. and that's fine because i prefer being alone. but i hate that i can't act normal in social situations and ppl always think im rude or weird when im not trying to be 😢 and it sucks because i kinda have to be in social settings sometimes because i have children. and i dread it for these reasons every time. nobody is interested in the same things as me. and when i talk about my interests ppl tell me im too obsessed with something or tell me its weird altogether. which hurts. and when i am able to make "friends" i always get taken advantage of because i can never tell when someone is taking advantage of me and my kindness or if they have malicious intentions with me. and i feel stupid every time because my bf will tell me they are "obviously playing you" or my mom will say stuff like "can't you tell that they aren't interested?" or the one i always get is "why can't you see that this guy is flirting with you/trying to sleep with you."

idk if im just having a panic attack or a mental breakdown or what. but this has been building up inside of me for years. i feel so stupid and weird. i have to carry lotion around with me because if my hands don't have moisture on them at all times i literally sit there with chills going up my spine and i can't touch anything. certain clothes make me want to rip my skin off. and my family gets annoyed every time i have to run back in the house because i forgot to grab it. which just adds to the guilt i feel for being this way and i can't control these issues no matter how hard i try.

i've literally made so many lists and "rules" for myself on how to act around ppl and i try so hard to follow them just to get through whatever event is going on.

i think thats why i throw myself into my interests and use them to escape reality so much. once i find something i like i become obsessed with it forever and i talk about it so much to the point where my bf tells me its too much. certain characters and shows are the only thing that brings me comfort sometimes. i have so many unnecessary lists and categories for my interests. i know its very time consuming and pointless but just having them makes me feel better. like pinterest for example is my best friend lol. making these lists and stuff just soothes me in a way. as stupid as that sounds. but even tho it comforts me it still makes me feel stupid because ive never met anyone else who does that.

i've never ever spoken about this stuff online/publicly before. mainly because of embarrassment and fear of being bullied for it since ive already been relentlessly harassed for a million other things. i just have so much anxiety all the time. and doing pointless things helps with it but i want to stop feeling this way. or at least have answers as to why i am this way so maybe i can fix it. im tired of feeling awkward or different from other ppl. i want to be normal and pleasant to be around. i want to get along with the other parents at school functions instead of being scared to talk to ppl. i can't even make eye contact with anyone i talk to. ive tried since i was LITERALLY a child and no matter what i always get scared or nervous and look away. and its really noticeable to other ppl because they've mentioned it to me.

i'm posting this to vent but also maybe someone reading this has gone through the same thing or can help me. because i feel so hopeless and im scared im going to be this way forever. ive only been able to find info on the sensory thing and ive found that there is no way to get rid of it. ive tried everything and ive given up on that. but i know i can change my actions and how i interact with ppl if i can just figure out WHY i am like this.

pls don't laugh at me or say anything mean if you choose to comment on this post. i already have so much anxiety and fear about posting it. i don't want sympathy or anything like that. i just need help 😞🥺😢

i have an appointment booked for seeing a psychiatrist but that isn't until november i haven't seen one since i was a little kid. so i'm hoping to maybe get some answers in the meantime.

i already can't work and im getting disability soon because my bipolar is so crippling. it affects my ability to function so much. and i have these other problems on top of it. the fact that i can't even make a living like "normal" ppl makes me feel bad about myself already. and since i can't get a job or a career i want i just want to feel normal in my everyday life and around ppl AT THE VERY LEAST.

[emililyqueer]

so... this is just kind of a personal emotional dump. i don't want to bring anyone down, you can ignore this if you just want to do the sexy stuff.

but it is an insight into me, so ya know. here it is. it turned out a lot longer than i wanted... to be honest it's sort of turned into my life story. um. sorry.

i spent so much of my life being ashamed and confused and depressed. i suppose, the thing is... i'm tired of watching other people live the life that i wanted to live.

i was brought up in a very conservative small town, in the middle of fkin nowhere. the place was extremely homogenous. no (visibly) gay or trans people, almost no people of colour. i had a single, disabled mother. my dad was very mentally ill, and he was abusive and violent with it, and even though he left when i was in single digits, he's left some very deep scars on me. i went to school under the time of the Section 28 law - which is to say, LGBT issues were banned in school, and bullying gay and trans kids was absolutely allowed to happen, or else the teachers could be seen as "taking a side" on a "controversial issue". this happened to me multiple times. i hated school. even though i started off in life with a passion of learning, going there broke my enthusiasm for literally decades.

i was queer, and i was in denial. i... sort of understood, i think?? but i realised very young that i couldn't rely on anyone, not my parents, not my teachers, not my peers. i grew up obsessed with the idea of self-reliance and some fucked up idea of personal strength. even after a university friend of mine came out, and i realised i might be trans, i still clung to these ideas, to masculinity and self-isolation. they had kept me "safe" and i felt i needed them. i abused drink and drugs because i felt empty and just wanted to fucking feel something, at least something other than anxiety and despair. it felt like parts of me were missing. most of the time, i felt either nothing, or fear, or stress, unless i was high.

i had health problems, i didn't have any energy or concentration (i later learned that i had ADD), i was depressed, and i had chronic migraines. i went to university to study a BSc in computer science, and i couldn't complete it due to these health problems.

and yeah, the health problems and depression became disabling... because of that i was constantly broke. this country, the tory party especially (but not only the tories), hates disabled people with a passion. i was into political activism at the time and the number of deaths of sick and disabled people coming out of the initial austerity era actually kind of broke my faith in society, i couldn't believe this was being allowed to happen.

as an aside - that was a choice. austerity was a choice, and it came with a body count in the tens of thousands (according to the British Medical Journal) before they just stopped fucking counting. this is a thing that actually happened in one of the richest countries on earth, and it happened as the richest people in that country only got richer and richer, and then we just... forgot, because disabled people don't fucking matter, do we? i'm sorry to get political in the middle of my own miserable ramble but these bastards need to burn in hell for what they did. fuck the tories

anyway.

because i abused my body, and i couldn't afford decent healthcare, or transition related stuff, i actually wrote off my appearance. i decided i would never be able to look good or feel good about myself. there was a brief time when i first got on HRT where i felt great about the future, but once i realised how badly i'd already hurt myself... i just gave up. for a lot of my life i was convinced that i wouldn't be here in the next few months or years, so why build a future?

my desires and sense of identity were just completely buried under a mountain of shame, self loathing, lack of direction, and substance abuse. i lost so, so many years.

so... how are things today? my living situation is crap. it's secure, but miserable. one tiny room, with mold in it which is aggravating my allergies. my financial situation is still bad, but it's not critical - i am struggling to afford some medications, but generally i'm afloat. i am, so far, just about able to maintain a small old car, which i rely on, because i live in the sticks and there's fck all public transport here. mentally, i still struggle, but it's so so much better than it was, and it is getting better. my physical health is... concerning me; i have a lot less energy than i'd like, and i'm in almost always in pain. in terms of drugs, i am mostly clean. i don't really drink, i don't smoke (neither tobacco nor anything else), but i do use prescription painkillers.

one of the bigger things is my gender and sexuality... confusing as hell, i'm in a superposition between trans woman and like... femboy, or sissy feminine man. i don't really understand it, parts of all these things appeal strongly to me on a deep, honest, fundamental level. i'm really not sure how to interpret this.

and, well, when i look at some certain sex workers and models... i feel equal parts inspired, and like i want to cry. i keep seeing people who lived the life i always wanted, and i see how fucking happy and successful they are, and i feel so many things all at once.

but... i am still here. i do still have time left. and i do know a few things about me for sure:

i am a reasonably intelligent person. i'm good with computers, electronics, and cars. i like music, travelling, and um i think i like cooking??? and of course video games. i mean duh, i'm a queer on the internet! :p

i'm determined, i don't want to lie down and die any more, i want things to get better for me, i want a future.

but i think... above all? it's the things i was ashamed of that i love the most. i love kink, i love femininity, i love showing off, i desire outrageous sexual experiences, and looking hot and changing the person i see in the mirror. i want to do porn, to revel in eroticism and queerness, and i want to take these things seriously.

so, that's what i'm going to do. that's why i'm posting this here alongside the fun kinky stuff. it's important, this is me.

[lyloneliness]

This will have nothing to do with bsd and will be very personal so those who follow me for bsd stuff you can stop reading if you want ₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

Actually, I don't think many remember, or have even read the tag game (edit: my bad, it was an ask) in which I said I actually have something similar to a Dissociative Identity Disorder.. Well, even if no one reads this I just wanna put my thoughts down so it's okay anyway.

I just realized that now that I'm dissociated, what is 'me' as an alter (alternative personality), or more as a person is supposed to be way more defined... Or restricted in a way. I was always a weird person, with many changes of heart, of moods, of likings and other stuff... Well, in everything really.

Back then, if I was to use only one word to define myself I would always answer "changing", or "inconsistent". One time I even got very upset at my parents and cried because they said it was a bad word, a bad thing, that I shouldn't describe myself as inconsistent... I felt like they rejected the fact that I am like this, or just basically, like they rejected me.

Anyway, now I know that it was because the different parts of 'me' that were supposed to assemble in one identity at the end of early childhood didn't assemble like with most people, those who don't struggle with severe dissociation. And with people with a 'complete' DID, they don't assemble at all, and one becomes the main while the others appear later in life to help the 'whole person'/system navigate in life, adaptating to situations by switching. But for me it was just like a child doesn't knowing how to combine many things to make a proper collage just taped a ripped sheet of paper together to vaguely maintain it, faking it being whole.

That's why I was like that, I was literally different persons stitched together and coexisting throughout my life.

And now that each of us is separated from the others, and well defined, they all know what they like, how they are, who they are. Well, they don't even have to acknowledge it, they just ARE like that.

All but me.

I'm the 'main', the one to whom all this life is attributed to, the base of our existence until now. And all the memories I have are supposed to be mine. My feelings, my likings, my relationships, my behaviors.. But now I know most of them were the other alters', and I don't know anymore what I like. What is 'me' in all of this?

I don't know how to make the distinction. I don't know what I like, how I'm supposed to act like. The person I was supposed to be wasn't really me all this time, so the image I had of myself is crushed.. I always felt like I wasn't properly someone, I never knew who I was, so I made efforts. But turns out all the progress I thought I had made over the years to construct my personality just split at the same time as us, I'm back to before I constructed everything I'm supposed to be. There is nothing left for me..

I can't even say what my favorite colour is.

I don't have an identity.

I feel like a digital painting to which all the layers were took away to make a complete painting out of each, and all is left is the blank canvas. That's indeed a weird comparison but well, I'm supposed to be an artist so I couldn't think of something else.

I feel like I'm a middle schooler in the middle of an existential crisis when I'm supposed to be 19 in a little more than a month. Everyone always said I was a mature one, turns out one of my alters was 4 years older all this time, and now I can't seem to see things from a distance, cool my head and try to understand anymore. Everything is blurry and I'm scared. Honestly, I forgot what it was to be lost and scared. 'I ' almost didn't feel anything in a year and now I'm blending with a big mess of feelings that I don't even know are mine or not, and how I need to react to them.

I don't even know if I'm tired of being in this void, or sad, or disappointed by this loss of self... I drown myself in hypersomnia to avoid existing like this and thinking about what I'm gonna become and how I'm supposed to become it (well, I don't even know what I want to be to begin with.. ), only to have weird dreams that I don't know are whose since I switch even in it, and deciphering it all seems exhausting.

I don't know what to do. I don't even know if I actually want to do anything..

Well, this is all for the rambling! (≡^∇^≡)

I kinda feel sorry for anyone who'd get until here reading all this mess... If you wanna say smth or ask questions I'm all open really. Even if it's quite unlikely.. but yeah, "just in case", yknow (=ㅇ༝ㅇ=)

Oh! And something that made me laugh (bitterly but still) :

*Incoming screenshot of when I was writing*, for those with the blue theme like me

Auto correct didn't even consider this possible 😹😹😹

[kleoyeager78]

10 things I hate about you | 11

I sighed getting out of bed.

I had a major headache. I always got them when I was thinking too hard about something. I opened my nightstand to get an Advil and then got up to get ready for school.

Like normal I didn't go all out, I got on a simple outfit and started my walk for school.

It was very windy today for some reason, but I guess I can't be surprised because like everything else in Paradis the weather was unpredictable.

I made it to school, met up with Annie and we made our way to class.

I saw Eren when I walked into class but ignored him and put my head down.

"Cheer up buttercup, you aren't happy to see me?" Eren said as he sat in front of me.

"Eren leave her alone." Armin quickly came to his side to defend me.

I put my head up and was face to face with Eren. Today I didn't feel like crying. I don't know why but I was just tired. Today I felt like I was a zombie just existing to exist with no other purpose and I don't think anyone could change that, not even Eren.

"Come on Armin we're just talking, right y/n?" Eren looked at Armin then back at me but I just put my head back down.

Eren was about to say something about how I was acting today but was soon stopped by Mr. Smith coming in the classroom and that Sasha girl shouting.

"Mr. Smith you forgot to put the partners on the board" Sasha said.

"I'm sorry Sasha. After you guys, I had five classes, so I did forget. But in order to simply assign you partners this morning, I did spend time yesterday writing all of your names on popsicle sticks. Mr. Smith stated with a small smile, but when he saw that the class wasn't interested, his expression returned to normal.

"I'll read them now," he said, mixing up the cup of popsicle sticks he had.

He pulled out two popsicle sticks and began to read the names off of them. "

"Connie and......Sasha" He read, making both Connie and Sasha get a big smile on their faces.

Lucky them, I thought to myself. I knew I wouldn't get a good partner because everyone in this class hated me except for Annie. But the chances of getting her were unlikely since, when has life ever been that good to me?

"Annie and..." Mr. Smith said, reaching for another stick. I crossed my fingers and hoped it'd be my name he called but of course, "Armin"

I mentally sighed when I heard I wasn't getting Annie but what I heard next was much worse. "Y/n and......Eren"

I literally slammed my head on the desk. I didn't even mean to; it was just a reflex but still.

It's been confirmed my life really is a circus and sadly for me I have to be the clown to entertain everyone. I mean come on it's crazy how everyone else gets the people they want, and I get Eren fucking Yeager. The guy who hates my whole existence.

After Mr. Smith said I would be partnered up with Eren I zoned out. I didn't care to hear anything anymore.

I didn't notice how long I had been zoned out until I felt a tap on my arm.

The tap came from Annie's side of my body, so I knew it was her. Eren wouldn't dare put his hands on me near Annie.

"We have to start working with our partners" she informed me and just as she did Eren turned his chair around and began staring at me like a hawk.

Armin also turned his chair around and flashed me and Annie smiles.

I sent him one back and then faced Eren. I thought I was okay working with him but as soon as my eyes met his I just felt drained.

I got up and walked to Mr. Smith's desk which made Eren confused so he watched my every movement.

"Hi Mr. Smith" I said when I approached his desk. He looked up at me and put down his stack of papers.

"Hello y/n, how can I help you?"

"Well, my stomach hurts really bad and I really need to go to the bathroom." I said with a frown while rubbing my stomach.

Mr. Smith reached for the bathroom pass and then handed it to me. "Here you go"

"Thank you, sir," I walked out of the classroom.

In truth I wasn't going to the bathroom, I was going to the library to rest. I was extremely tired and would much rather sleep than see Erens dumb face.

-

Erens Pov

It's been about 20 minutes and y/n still aren't back. It's not like I care but I am trying to pass this class and I can't really do that if I don't have a partner.

"Eren, can you come here for a second?" Mr. Smith asked, making me get out of my seat and walk over to him.

"Yes sir?"

"Y/n has been gone a long time. Can you go check on her? I'm a bit worried." He said scratching the back of his head.

"Uh sure sir. Where is she?"

"She's in the bathroom, Thank you"

I made my way out of the class and to the bathroom where y/n was supposed to be.

Since it was the girl's bathroom I couldn't just go in, so I knocked on the bathroom door but got no answer. "Y/n" I called but still no answer. "Is anyone in there?" I said but didn't get an answer. I decided to just walk in the bathroom to see if she was there, but she wasn't. All the stalls were empty.

I was about to walk out of the bathroom when I bumped into someone.

Historia.

"Eren" she beamed. "You must've gotten my message about meeting me here. I mean it was 20 minutes ago, but you came and that's all that matters." She smiled and hugged me.

I didn't know what the hell she was talking about. If I'm being honest, I've had her blocked for a week now so I definitely wouldn't have gotten her message.

"Ah no actually I'm looking for y/n" I said getting her off me.

"Oh," she said, trying to hide the dirty look that was trying so hard to reach her face. "Why would you do that?" she said with a smile, but I could tell she wasn't being genuine because her voice cracked.

"Mr. Smith asked me to" I said, rocking on my heels. The conversation was awkward.

I saw instant relief on her face when she saw I wasn't looking for y/n on my own freewill. "Do you think we can hang then?" She asked me and began to get a little touchier which let me know by "hang" she meant fuck.

"Oh no I'm actually trying to get back to class, maybe later though."

She sighed and gave me her best puppy dog eyes. "Please Eren, I need you." She whined.

Her begging did nothing but annoy me. I tried to keep my cool, but I could feel myself getting ready to tell her to fuck off. "I'm sorry but I really have to go."

I didn't even give her a chance to beg. I just left.

I didn't know where y/n was. For all I know she could be anywhere so I texted Armin and asked if he could ask Annie or something.

He told me that she was most likely in the library, so I headed there.

Sure, enough when I went into the library the first thing, I saw was a sleeping y/n.

I was going to go up to her and wake her up, but as I got closer, I changed my mind. I'm not sure why, but I didn't want to wake her. She appeared to be sleeping peacefully, and something told me she needed the rest.

On a normal day, this would have only made me want to mess with her even more, but something felt off. I really only messed with her to see if she would break, but today she just didn't feel breakable.

I didn't mean this in a way that suggested she was too happy for me to break through; rather, I meant that it seemed as though she had already been broken.

I decided to just sit and wait for her to get up.

-

Third person Pov

About 10 minutes later you finally decided to get up.

You extended your arms and glanced in front of you when you saw the brunette seated across from you looking at his phone.

You jumped a little startled from his presence.

"What are you doing here?" You spoke quietly because you were in a library and your voice was raspy from just waking up.

He put his phone back in his pocket before looking at you. "Great, you're finally awake." He gave you a smirk and flicked your forehead. "Mr. Smith was worried because you were gone for so long and wanted me to check up on you. He thought you had overdosed in the bathroom or something" Eren stated going back on his phone.

"Oh" was all you said. You started to get up ready to make your way back to class when Eren grabbed your arm.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

You looked at him like he was half stupid and then pulled your arm away. "I don't know Eren we are in a school, and I have class, I think you can put the pieces together"

Eren rolled his eyes. "Damn you're real sassy today" Eren grabbed your arm again but this time he pulled you down towards his face. "If you don't fix that attitude, I may have to fix it for you." He said with a flirtatious smirk on his face. He reached his other hand up to touch your face, but you instantly smacked it away.

You walked out of the library and sat on the ground next to the door.

It was still windy outside, but you didn't mind because you needed the breeze.

You were seriously considering skipping the rest of school, but then you remembered you'd have to deal with your dad when you got home, which you didn't want to do, so skipping wasn't an option.

You crossed your arms on top of your knees and put your head down. "When is this hell going to end?" You mumbled to yourself.

You sat there for a few seconds before you heard the library door open.

You put your head up a little to see who it was and of course it was Eren so you groaned and put your head back down.

"y/n we only have 15 more minutes of the first period so i'm going back to class do what you want." Eren said and then walked away.

You inwardly cursed yourself for sleeping for so long. You didn't even realize you'd slept for that long; you believed you just slept for 20 minutes. You stood up and began walking to class. However, you took a different path than Eren. You didn't want to walk with him and listen to his negative remarks.

Your route was slightly longer than Eren's, and by the time you arrived at class, he was already sitting in his chair.

Surprisingly Mr. Smith didn't seem upset about your disappearance and when you tried to go up to him to explain all he said was, "Eren already told me. I understand these things happen, don't worry about it." with a smile

It made you wonder what Eren had told him but then again, your headache had taken over all your thought process, so you nodded and headed to your seat.

When you started approaching your seat Eren didn't notice you because he was turned around talking to Armin and Annie. While approaching your seat you overheard a bit of their conversation.

"Annie, how could you be friends with someone so selfish like that?" Eren said.

"You're one to talk." Annie said defending you like usual.

"Oh what's that supposed to mean? When i'm partners with someone I dont go running off just to fucking sleep."

"And you give her every reason to do so." Annie said.

Eren didn't say anything, he just remained looking upset.

"I mean, Eren, you can't be that upset. Perhaps if you weren't so cruel to y/n, she wouldn't have run away from you. plus, she appeared to have gone through a lot this morning, so maybe she couldn't deal with you." Armin said, attempting to see everything through.

"Whatever" Eren huffed. "I don't even know why I covered for that bitch."

"Who the hell are you-" Annies sentence was cut short as you finally got to your seat.

Everyone went silent but you just put your head down. This made Eren suck his teeth.

"Was 30 minutes not enough rest for you? What was the point of coming back if you were just going to sleep again" he groaned.

"Eren I wish you would shut up for at least 20 minutes" you said with your head still down and with a sleepy tone.

"Aww how cute. Sadly i'm not a genie so get your ass up." he retorted

You sighed and put your head up, knowing you wouldn't be able to sleep because he insisted on talking. "Yeager, what can I do for you?"

"Oh thank you so much y/n for being so sweet and finally collaborating. I don't know you can start by working on your side of the assignment, ''he said sarcastically.

"And what might that be?" you said genuinely confused. Annie had told you but of course you forgot.

Eren let out another sound showing he was aggravated. "If you would get off your ass and listen-" He took a deep breath to refrain from saying anything that might earn him a kick from Annie. "Ugh we are supposed to write ten things about our partners."

"That's simple, why didn't you just say that." you said confused on why he had trouble saying the simplest thing.

"Yeah, it is simple that's why you could have heard it for yourself. But anyways don't just put ten things on a piece of paper Mr. Smith wants it to be in a creative way. "

"Okay let's get sta-" you were about to start but the bell for next period cut your sentence short.

Eren groaned and sent you a death glare. "You gotta be shitting me." He whispered.

"Don't worry class these aren't do for a while, so you'll have plenty of time to finish" Mr. Smith shouted.

"Great." Eren stated. "y/n meet me Saturday at the park at 1 pm you better be there." He said getting his backpack and walking out the door with Armin and Mikasa.

You rolled your eyes and began packing your belongings for your next class. When you were finished, you went to find Annie, who was, of course, waiting for you by the door, so you went to her. "Hey, are you ready? " She asked.

"Yeah"

"All right, let's go." Annie began walking, and you followed, but you soon discovered she was walking in an entirely different way than our next class.

"Annie, this isn't the way to our next class."

"I know, we aren't going to it"

"Huh? Where are we going then?"

"Were skipping"

"What why?" you were getting scared and confused at this point. You and Annie might have stayed in the bathroom for like half a class but never did you guys skip.

"Because y/n you need rest. You're obviously tired and you can't get the rest you need here."

"No Annie I can't"

"I didn't ask," Annie stated firmly, letting you know she would drag you if she had to. But you definitely weren't letting her win this because you truly couldn't skip. You would be too scared to go home.

"Annie, you know I can't. My dad would be mad if I showed up at home at this time."

"Who said we were going to your house?"

"Where are we going then?"

"Mine. My dad isn't home and won't be for the next 3 days so you should be able to get some sleep before having to go home."

"Aww Ann-"

"Shut up"

you giggled at her being unaffectionate as always.

Our walk came to a stop, and you noticed that you had made it to the parking lot. you got in Annie's car and headed to her house.

Annie's house was nice; it was middle-class, like yours. You'd only been here twice before, so it's not like you hadn't seen it before, but you liked how neat Annie kept things. You wished you could keep your stuff as tidy, but Angie usually messed them up. But it's not like you gave a crap.

"Thanks again," you said, sitting on her bed.

"No problem, I know it's probably hard to get sleep since you have a lot on your plate at home."

You sighed. "Yeah"

"You're a busy woman y/n and I respect you for that so i'm not going to let you work yourself more than you have to"

You chuckled at Annies statement and put your head in your hands, hanging it low. "Annie I don't deserve someone like you" your voice cracked.

"Don't say such dumb things y/n"

"I mean it," you said as you lifted your head to gaze at her. She froze as she saw the tears streaming down your cheeks. "I've met a lot of people in my life, and none of them have ever believed in me, except you and Levi, and that's why disappointing you guys hurts the most."

"y/n what's wrong with you today? This seems like more than just a few missed hours of sleep"

Her worrying only made you cry harder "I'm so sorry Annie"

Annie didn't know what to do. She knew you were having a mental breakdown but this one was more serious than the usual ones. She immediately got you some tissues.

When she was handing them to you you pulled her shirt and hugged her while you sobbed. She didn't care for affection but she sensed you needed it and rubbed your back until you stopped sobbing.

"Now tell me what's the matter y/n"

You took a deep breath. "Where do I start, Annie."

You ended up telling her everything that happened yesterday from the time you got home to the time you woke up.

"I wouldn't take it personally, y/n," Annie remarked after you finished describing everything to her. "Angie is young, so she doesn't comprehend how bad your father is. And I'm very sure Violet's words from yesterday prompted her to say what she said. She was probably projecting her rage and trying to attack you where it hurt because Violet taught her that.

"You're right Annie."

"I know," she said, making you giggle.

"When are you ever wrong" you shook your head smiling.

"I can't recall." Annie pointed at her chin looking up at the ceiling.

You laughed. "What would I do without you?"

"You would go insane with your crazy mind," she stated.

"Hey" you looked over at her with your hand over your chest looking offended. "

I mean you're not wrong but ouch."

Annie giggled. Which made you smile on the inside.

Before the two of you realized it you were on top of Annie tickling her and she was beneath you squirming and giggling. How did you end up here? Who knows, all that mattered was the two of you were having fun.

"Say it" you shouted.

"Never" Annie said giggling while trying to get you off of her. You knew she was having fun and joking because if not she would have been kicked you off of her.

"Say it Annie." you started tickling her more.

"No y/n" she continued to giggle.

If someone saw the two of you they would think that you two were a bunch of goofballs but little did they know this was the rarest sight they would probably ever witness.

You tickled her even more and she finally cracked. "fine , fine i'll say it"

"Then say it"

"I can't if you're on top of me"

"Oh. you're right" you giggled and moved.

Annie seemed out of breath from all the giggling so she seemed like she was trying to speak, that is until she pushed you and ran.

You got up almost immediately and started chasing her. You chased her all over the house until she made it to the bathroom and locked the door. "Annie, you can't stay in there forever."

"Like hell I can't," she giggled.

You sat down next to the door and gained your breath. You didn't know how you were going to catch her but you knew you were. That's when you remembered there was a window in the bathroom. You weren't sure if it was open but you were sure going to find out.

You made your way outside and to the window. Surprisingly when you made your way outside you saw Annie escaping out the window.

You made sure she didn't see you and then when she came walking in your direction you waited until she was too close to run and jumped at her. You landed on top of her and made sure her head didn't hit the ground.

"You think you're getting away that easy, without saying it" you laughed.

You started tickling her again and of course she became a laughing mess under you.

"Damn I really can't get away from you." Annie said in between her laughs.

"Nope"

"Fine then i'll say it"

"Good and im not getting off you"

Annie sighed. "y/n is my favorite person in the world." Annie said defeated.

You began to kiss all around her face which made her laugh. "y/n I didn't agree to this the hell" she said but couldn't even keep a serious demeanor seeing how happy you were.

To her it was a relief to see you happy because today you truly were not being your normal self.

While you were pampering her face you noticed out of the corner of your eye something furry near her fence. It was a dog.

You stopped pampering her face. "Annie look" you said looking directly at the dog.

"He looks disgusted." Annie said.

"He's like damn you homosexuals" you added making yourself and Annie laugh.

After that, you and Annie went to pet the dog, then returned inside, where you two lost track of time and napped, and the day ended there.

a/n - yesss y/n x Annie era lol jk but I love them. I missed yall! I'm sorry I haven't updated but my brain has been on E I literally couldn't put anything into words. But yeah. Did you like this chapter? Just wanted to let you know this side of Annie is extremely rare and you probably will barely see it again but slay I love yall so much.

[daes0]

Ending One

Rafayel and all the ways he says he l̶̯̞̱̬̘̜̗̏͒̂̐̈͋̍̓ô̶̡͙̤̻̐̓͑̚͝v̴͕͖̙̦̩͚͓̠̌̄͂͒͜ȇ̵̪̆͐̒̈́͠s̶̬̬̼͆͛̚ you.

Pairing: {Rafayel x Reader}

Rating: {Mature}

Word Count: {2.3k words, 24.6k for entire work}

liar liar lover

You wake up in a hospital room. Rafayel is asleep next to you, but he stirs when he hears you moving.

"_____?" his voice is etched in worry. "Oh my god, _____!"

Rafayel envelops you in a hug, careful not to accidentally hurt you but so desperate to have you in his arms.

He lets go begrudgingly. "You've been asleep for four days," he tells you, his brows furrowed together. "You can't just leave me like that!"

"Not like I did it on purpose," you say, and your voice is scratchy and rough.

Rafayel hugs you again. "I thought you were going to die, _____," he mumbles against your hair. "So much… so much happened."

"Tell me what happened," you say.

So he does.

Rafayel tells you about how he had gone into the bathroom inside the exhibit when all of a sudden he heard screaming. He tried to get out, but the door wouldn't budge. He managed to escape the brunt of the arson attack because of it.

You don't question it. How could you? It's Rafayel, the love of your life, and you feel so tired to think anything more of it. You can't help the brain fog, but even if you didn't have that you still would refuse to question him. It's Rafayel. Rafayel is safe. Rafayel is yours.

He wouldn't hurt you. He wouldn't hurt anyone.

~

Xavier comes to visit you. He informs you that the hunters are sure that this was an arsonist's work and are investigating everything they possibly can. He tells you that all the paintings were destroyed, but it was confirmed that one of them went missing.

~

More time passes.

You've mostly recovered now. It's been two months since the attack. You've been living in Rafayel's place since you were discharged from the hospital. You didn't want to be alone, and Rafayel needed to recover from the exhibit, so you two just ended up living in his art studio.

You've gone through a lot together.

~ 

“It’s a promise.”

You're surprised at the gift. A lovescale- a fish scale fossil that's in the shape of a heart. "If it's our anniversary, I literally forgot to keep track of it-"

"It's not because of that," he says with a small chuckle. "It's because I love you."

You realize that he hasn't said it outside of the fogged up mirror. And you're surprised, because it feels like he's said it. Then you realize that he's said it in a myriad of ways that mean I love you, but just not worded as "I love you." He's loved you for a long time now. Rafayel loves you.

"What do you promise?" you ask as you accept the gift.

"That I'll love you forever. Through all our lifetimes, through all the universes, through every existence. I'll love you an eternity's worth."

You feel your heart melt at his words. "I love you too, Rafayel."

You kiss him, softly at first, gentle, then with more force, more passion.

He pulls back for breath. "Wait, wait, I had something else planned."

You tilt your head, curious, and wait for him to continue.

Rafayel goes to the closet and pulls out a small painting.

You recognize it immediately as one of the one's from the exhibit.

"Did you remake it?" you ask, a little nervous but you're not sure why.

"No," he shakes his head, "It's from the last Flux Arts exhibit."

You're confused for a moment, but then remember what Xavier said. About a painting being missing. About how the hunters thought the arsonist had stolen it.

Your heart beats faster.

"Rafayel," your mouth feels dry, "Why do you have this?"

He smiles, as if it means nothing, as if it means absolutely fucking nothing. "I'm the killer, my love."

You don't know how to react, but a shudder of fear goes through your body. As a hunter, you've been taught to act, to avoid the instinct to freeze. But you can't help it. You can't move. It's Rafayel, and because of that you can't move. You hesitate. You fucking hesitate.

You can barely talk, but one question comes out of your lips anyway. "Why?"

Rafayel takes a step closer. "Humans have persecuted my people for generations. I managed to track down the reincarnations that almost made my people extinct, and, well… I wanted vengeance."

He says it so nonchalantly, like he's explaining why he likes seafood.

"Rafayel," you say in a low voice. "Raf… What- what do you mean?" You're so confused. "You- you're… No, no…" you start laughing under your breath. "Raf, this is a sick joke, this is a disgusting joke."

"It's not a joke," he says with a tilt of his head.

"No, fuck, stop it, Raf." You're mad. You're so mad. You went through hell as a hunter on this case and now he's making fun of it? You hate it. For a moment, you hate him.

"I'm not joking."

He takes another step closer. 

"I'm not joking," he repeats, the same old smile on his face.

Suddenly there's a knife to your throat.

The smile is gone now. "I'm not joking."

"Raf-"

The knife digs into the skin of your neck, and you feel warm blood pool on its edge.

You don't know what to do. You don't know how to move.

"What are you going to do, _____?" Rafayel asks you.

You try to remember your training, but nothing comes to mind. So, instead of acting as a hunter, you act as yourself. "Put the knife down."

Rafayel breathes in a laugh, but then he lowers the blade. "What are you going to do now?"

"Why are you doing this?" you can't help but ask. "I didn't know it was you. I didn't know. Why did you tell me? Why did you want me to know?"

"Because I love you. Because I want you to love me for everything I am. Because this- this vengeance, is part of who I am."

"No," you shake your head, trying to rid yourself of this nightmare. "No, no, you're Rafayel, you're not… you're not a killer."

"I've lived a long life, _____. You don't live as an immortal without killing a few people."

"Then why- why kill without reason?" You're so confused. Your eyes well up with tears. You want this nightmare to desperately be over.

"It's not without reason." He lifts the knife and brings it up to his lips. He's about to lick it, taste your blood, but something in him makes him stop. He lowers the knife. "It's vengeance."

"For what?!" you beg.

"For my people," he explains calmly.

"It's been centuries-"

"And they keep coming back." His eyes darken. "You humans. You always reincarnate. You always come back. And you always hurt my people, you always kill or maim us for our blood. You've spent lifetimes with our blood on your hands!"

"I haven't!" Your scream echoes across his art studio. Then, in a quieter, broken voice, you repeat it. "I haven't."

He thinks about this for a moment. "You're right. Your lifetimes may be complacent, but you've never hurt us. If anything, you've helped us survive many times. But that's why I didn't kill you. That's why I killed them instead."

You're quiet.

"Speak," he asks. "I need you to talk. Need to know what you're thinking. Need to know what you're planning on doing."

"Are you going to kill me?" you ask just above a whisper.

"No." He flips the knife from one hand to the other. "I don't want to."

"What if I tell the hunters-"

"You won't." He smiles that bastard smile. "I know you won't."

You feel your knees give out and you find yourself on the ground.

He kneels down in front of you.

"So, _____. What are you going to do?"

He takes your hand and puts the knife on your palm.

"Do you want to kill me?"

You grip the knife, but your hand shakes. 

(Why do you hesitate?)

The knife drops to the floor.

He hums in approval. "It's okay if you change your mind, you know. I won't stop until I'm forced to."

You stare at the knife on the floor. Your vision spins. Black dots form at the edges, and you feel like you're fading.

"I love you, _____."

Rafayel suddenly hugs you, holding you in his strong arms. And in the moment, you find yourself wanting the comfort. You accept the hug. Your tears fall on his shoulder.

"Do you still love me?" he asks.

And you're not sure. You're not sure.

"It's okay," he coos. "You don't have to say anything right now."

You're not sure.

"I love you," he reminds you, kissing you on the forehead. "We'll be okay."

You're not sure.

~

Rafayel carries you to the bed before tucking you in. "I'm going to sleep on the couch tonight," he tells you. "Let me know if you need anything."

And so you sleep.

You dream of a different life, one where Rafayel is gentler, where he's the person you fell in love with and there are no secrets. And in that dream, you're still not sure, so you choose yourself. It's an okay choice to make. You live your life, and you find that you can survive just fine without him. You have your family- your grandmother and your stepbrother, both of which love you to the ends of the world. You have your friends- Zayne, who's a bit cold but has gotten warmer and cares so much about you, and Xavier, who's kind and always there to help you when you need it the most. A part of you wishes that Rafayel was there too, but it's okay that he's not. It's okay.

You wake up.

The knife is next to you on the nightstand. This time, you're determined. You take it and walk out of the room. Rafayel sleeps quietly on the couch.

His sleeping face, the gentle movement of his chest, the soft curls of his hair falling over his eyelids.

You promised yourself you wouldn't hesitate, that you wanted to kill the person who threatened your beloved. But it's Rafayel, your one and only. Your soulmate.

Rafayel had once told you that some soulmates are destined for tragedy. Is that what you are?

Your hands shake. For some reason, you don't want to drop it again, don't want him to awake with the sound of a knife. So you place the knife next to him on the table, giving it back.

You rub at your neck, feel the nicked wound, further confirmation that last night happened. There's a bit of dried blood on you, brittle against your fingertips. You head to the bathroom.

You open the faucet. Let the cool water rush in, covering your hands. It's striking, how cold it is, how frigid you feel. You bring a damp hand to your neck, shaking against the blood. You rub off the majority, but you still feel a bit of it stuck to your skin.

You grab a hand towel and bring it to the water. It's cold touch seeps in, and finally you bring it up to your neck. The cut stings against the roughness of the towel, but it works. You make sure not to break it back open.

The hand towel falls off your hands. You're shaking so much. You reach down and grab it. Your reflection on the mirror catches your eye as you straighten back up.

Your eyes are dark, swollen and tear-stained. You're crying. You clench your jaw and unclench, trying to focus.

Your reflection stares back at you. Why are you here?

"It's a promise," Rafayel had said.

The lovescale is in your hands. You don't remember when you pulled it out of your pocket. You just know that you've been staring at it for a while. Did you lose yourself again?

It's so heavy in your hands. You turn it around, letting the limited light of the bathroom shimmer against the scale's brilliant colors, somehow still bright against the darkness.

A laugh rumbles against your chest. You're laughing. You don't know why. 

"_____?" Rafayel calls out.

You put the lovescale back in your pockets. You exit the bathroom. "I'm here," you call out.

He gets up to stretch his muscles. You sit down on the couch and wait for him.

Finally, he sits back down. "Want to watch TV?" he suggests.

You hear the roar of a storm overhead. "Sure."

"Seems like it's gonna rain again today," Rafayel mentions off-hand.

"Yeah," you agree. "I kinda want to watch a romcom."

"Ooh, that sounds nice," he responds, then searches for a good romcom movie to watch.

You two end up cuddling next to each other on the couch. You feel the uneasiness on your chest, but for now you remain calm. You try to pay attention to the movie, you really do, but each word leaves your mind as soon as it comes. You try hard to hold onto the words that the main actress says, something about a four-leaf clover. Then you're distracted again, thinking about how only a few months ago, Rafayel had given you a clover. It was pressed in between the pages of a leather-bound journal. You don't remember where that journal is.

Now you can't help but think about it. This bit of flora, springing out of the ground, and taken. A destiny to be stuck in the pages of the dead flesh of a tree, kept as a memento.

The movie ends. Rafayel is smiling and laughing and you feel a pit in your stomach.

Memento mori, you think.

"Hmm?" he tilts his head in confusion. A sick part of you sees that and thinks it's cute.

"It's nothing. I guess I'm just distracted, is all."

You tuck your head in the crook of his neck. You breathe in his scent, let it overwhelm your senses, let it infiltrate all your thoughts.

He kisses your forehead. "It's okay."

END OF ENDING ONE

[softsky-daily]

6/3/2024

The sky felt extra big today.

Positive thing: The first day of my week-long class went well, and I finally got my copy of TTYD.

I have a good feeling about this class since I actually learned some new stuff, which I feel like hasn't been the norm lately in my program (how sad is that?). A speaker came today and talked about working with homicide survivor clients and it was very interesting and helpful. Heavy, but that was a given.

I've kinda just been wanting to cocoon in my room all day when I'm not doing school or work stuff. I've been so tired out. I wish there was more time to relax - I feel like I need a whole other year just to recover from this exhaustion, but I don't think that'll be coming anytime soon.

I did play TTYD today. I'm not far yet but I like the lighting changes and it looks really pretty overall. I also realized I forgot a lot of the story (the last Paper Mario game I played was Origami King back in 2020, and before that I replayed the original Paper Mario), so I might actually get some genuine surprises as I play. I can't wait to have Vivian on my team for sure though. She was always my favorite companion.

I also got a little farther in Hades and that was fun too. I'm pretty attached to the bow so I've been using that the whole time and I think I've gotten decent with it. I'm still stuck in Elysium, but it gets easier each run so I'm sure I'll push through soon.

Tomorrow's my long day since I have class all day until 10pm, so I'm just hoping I can sneak a nap and a meal in between at some point. I wonder how people balance all of this without someone else helping or quitting their job. The advice our program gave to us feeling overwhelmed was something like "most grad students quit their job to prioritize their studies so think about doing that" and to that I say, okay what about me who isn't "most grad students"? Screw us I guess. I already literally pay them to be here and that money doesn't come from thin air.

Anyways, I also got a bunch of packages today so opening them was fun. One of them was my Roxas shirt that I'm looking forward to wearing tomorrow. At least that'll be something.

[mis4dv3nture]

Kinktober, Day 20

Day 20: Watersports

Pairing: Rain x Phantom

Word count: 933

Rating: explicit

Tags: use of aphrodisiacs, rough sex, dirty talking, piss kink.

A/N: Please, read the fucking tags. I don't wanna be responsible of any kind of trauma.

<<You're such a messy Bug, aren't you?>> Rain had told him with a smile as he placed a small pot filled with water on the stove.

<<I promise I'll be more careful this time, but please, can I borrow some picks? I won't lose them, Rain, I swear>>

The water ghoul answered with a chuckle.

<<I'll give you some later, but now get a break, Bug, you've been working too hard today>> he told him in a soft voice, pulling a chair and inviting Phantom to sit <<come here, relax with me, I'm making some tea>>

He needed to practice. And he was always losing those damn picks all around the ministry. But how could he say no? Rain looked like he really cared about him, he couldn't refuse to stay with him.

After all, it was just a small break, right?

Rain carefully placed two teabags inside of the boiling water.

Just 10 minutes, right? Just a cup of tea and back to work.

But, obviously, it didn't go as he expected.

<<Huh, isn't it starting to get a bit hot here?>> the quint ghoul asked as his cheeks flushed with red after finishing the cup.

<<I don't know, Bug>> Rain answered faking innocence. He was definitely hiding something.

He looked ridiculously pretty. Phantom didn't know why, but he felt the sudden urge to pin him against a wall and-

<<I don't like this thing>> the water ghoul interrupted his thoughts <<do you want it? I don't want to throw it away>>

That tea wasn't actually that good, but Phantom didn't mind it. He accepted the second cup, Rain had barely taken a few sips.

It was starting to get hotter, the water ghoul was getting more and more fuckable. Phantom soon realised that he was getting hard. And Rain immediately seemed to notice.

<<Yeah, this aphrodisiac tea really tastes like shit>> he suddenly said with a grin.

<<This fucking what?!>> the quint ghoul shouted.

<<Oh, maybe I forgot this little detail>>

Phantom quickly got up and grabbed him by the throat, the water ghoul smirked.

<<You like playing these little games on me, don't you?>> he spoke with a menacing voice that did nothing else then make Rain hornier <<Now get your ass in my room and do something about it, you fucking slut.>>

<<Fuck, Bug, you already came twice, how are you still going?>> Rain whined as the quint ghoul kept bouncing on his dick.

He was a mess. Completely sweaty, his chest covered in the little ghoul's cum, his lips all red and swollen from the kisses, red marks on his thighs left by Phantom's claws.

And it still wasn't enough.

<<Next time you'll think twice before pulling those stupid tricks of yours on me>> he spat out as he slowly slipped away from his lenght <<I'm tired of riding you like a toy, come on, fuck me with my back against the mattress>>

Rain could help but obeying.

He carefully positioned him at the centre of the bed, then lifted his legs to hold them on his hips. Phantom let out a loud moan, feeling his deep slow thrusts.

<<Faster…>> he whimpered grabbing the sheets <<…harder…>> he really was out of his mind, all he wanted was to chase another orgasm <<…please Rainy>>

The water ghoul started getting more rough, Phantom kept moving louder and louder, starting to feel a hot sensation building up in his lower abdomen. He also felt some pressure there, but didn't care about it, he only needed to cum.

<<Fuck, fuck, keep going I'm so close>> he whined again.

<<You really are insatiable, aren't you, messy boy?>> the water ghoul answered with a grin. At this point he was literally folding him in half.

The pressure on his lower abdomen kept getting worse, but his orgasm was so damn close.

When Rain hit his sweet spot with one last firm thrust and his orgasm kicked in, he finally realised what that pressure in his lower belly was.

But it was too late.

And the worst thing was that he enjoyed it.

He closed his eyes, hiding his face behind his hands. When he got brave enough to finally open them again, the water ghoul was looking at him with a surprised expression, his cheeks flushed red. His belly, such as the sheets under them two, were completely wet.

Phantom felt like crying, he tried to escape by slipped away from Rain, still covering his face.

<<Bug! Come here, please, you don't have to be embarrassed, I…>> the water ghoul tried to stop him from running away.

<<Don't be embarrassed? I literally pissed myself while you were fucking me!>> he answered holding back tears, too embarrassed to look at him.

Rain quickly got up to hug him, the little ghoul definitely needed some comfort.

<<My Bug… my messy little Bug…>> he whispered to him as he kissed him on the head.

Phantom wiped away a tear from his face as he buried his face in Rain's chest.

<<You won't believe me but that was so fucking hot…>> he told him tenderly caressing his cheek.

The quint ghoul finally looked at him in the eyes, the water ghoul looked pretty aroused.

<<Please, please, Bug, do it again, I'm begging you…>> he whined as he got on his knees in front of him, palming at his lower belly <<but please, now do it on my face…>>