#fighting flying. kinda what i expected from the color scheme but not from the rest of it

[front-facing-pokemon]

[rootbeerrex]

@taters-for-tots ranks more dc characters: this time heroes

learning from our past mistakes, this version will be one long post.

once again, all opinions belong to

Superman (5/10)

"This kind is better because he's... he's just more wide, do you understand? he's more superman cause he's just very wide."

"Superman is like custard... and I won't elaborate on that."

"He's just. There's not many things you can say about him, everything's already been said. And also because he's a boring white boy. I am more interesting than superman."

"I haven't seen a superman who looked over the age of thirty in so long... this is what we should be doing. Superman should be a tired older man."

"Overwhelmingly average"

"The wonderbread of superheros, mostly in the color scheme."

2. Batman (6/10)

"We have discussed this before, but we need to bring up the duality of his ears..."

*looks up bat*

"order of flying mammals, that sounds like they're an organization" (Rex note: I don't think he knows what taxonomy is, but that's gonna be a shock for another day).

"what kind of bat is batman supposed to be. that's my question."

"'The batman cannot be comprehended and therefore cannot be stopped' I think I could stop him pretty easily. He can definitely be comprehended, I'm comprehending him right now! look at that, it's batman!"

"I'm just so desensitized to batman cause he's like. Everywhere."

(BTAS specific)

"Batman the animated series is so wild because- okay I love his design because he's so ANGULAR. This man is a POLYGON. that's just how things were in the 30s 50s 90s."

*rants about mickey mouse vs batman for about a minute straight*

"I know there were different rating systems when BTAS came out, but it's wild to be watching an animated PG series and seeing the joker fully pull out a machine gun and start SHOOTING at him. It's even MORE wild when he pulls out a pistol! And then it's not the little flag-gag like you expect, and he actually SHOOTS him!"

"I also think they got the length of his ears right on this one."

3. Wonder Woman (9/10)

"This crown design is. Goddamn."

"Wonder Woman is pretty cool. I have a Wonder Woman cape in my closet. I just think that she's pretty neat. I thought the Wonder Woman movie that came out recently- (rex note: it was 7 years ago) was pretty good!"

"I think it's cool that she's got her initials not once but twice on her outfit, and doesn't use a lot of weapons. She's got her lasso and her cuffs, and other than that she's just kinda punching people and that's awesome. And no one asked but she would beat captain america in a fight."

"Original comic wonder woman is also cool. She just always looks neat."

"The CALVE strength this woman must have to be doing all of this in high heels must be insane and I appreciate her so much for that."

"DC Superhero Girls newest version isn't very good because they made her too spindly, but this version looks like a person."

4. Martian Manhunter (guy/5)

"Hello?? who is this guy?? what's um... why is... what. who?"

*hearing his name without seeing spelled*

"John... Jones... Is his name???"

5. Flash (7/10)

"I want these boots. let it be known that I want these boots. Him eating a burger while running very fast.

"a lot of the rating for the boots, and the rest because his name is barry"

"I think it's fun that they were like- these other heroes have all these things like Superman has X-ray vision and flight, and Batman has grappling hooks and tech, and Wonder Woman is a GODDESS, and he just. He go fast and that's who he is."

"He's just a guy. He's just a little man. I like his little ear lightning bolts. Sometimes I forget that's what they're supposed to be and I think he's just wearing bluetooth headsets on both ears for some reason"

"I'd very much like to know what's going on here."

"This might've been a joke but... is there a reverse flash? What's his deal? I like to think that he runs really slow and it doesn't benefit him at all."

7. Cyborg (6.5/10)

"He's a guy. For sure. I don't know what's happening here where the skin on his fingers is all- like- crinkly? That's weird. But otherwise I think he's pretty cool. He's got a nice color scheme going on, I'll give him that."

"There's a cyborg guy, right? Is his name just cyborg?"

"I think he looks cool. It's a neat design, I just think he looks neat. yeah. I think he's pretty cool. I remember him mostly from the justice league ride at six flags because there's a really creepy animatronic of him standing outside the ride."

"Neat idea for a character, IDK a whole lot about of him, but he looks pretty cool."

---

And that is all for now, once again don't shoot the messenger for these opinions, @taters-for-tots is the one who called superman the "wonderbread of superheroes."

[fizzingwizard]

Ep 38 is another good one! We are on a roll. I have some thoughts on why and whether I could still end up whining in future episodes again... but for now let’s just enjoy the moment.

We are finally catching up with Yamato (and Jou) who has the sort of episode you’d expect from the brooding lone wolf of the group. I wish they’d pushed it just a liiiittle further than they did and I’ll tell you why below. Still, the point is we learned some things we needed to about Yamato, and with some higher than usual stakes (for a side plot) than usual.

Pic of the day, though, is all about his highness, our lord and savior, JOOOOOOOOO.

You will bow before him, peasant!

More below.

Like I said, the stakes are a bit high this week:

Right off the bat, Gabumon’s been beaten, captured, and tied to a cross...

... where Mephismon (this guy) is apparently planning to kill him in ritual sacrifice.

In other words, this episode is: Yamato and Gabumon Go To Digimon Hell

:P

I mean... Mephismon even looks scary. Very Satanic. Gives me chill, lol. Probably not as scary for kids who didn’t grow up being hit over the head with a Bible every day by evangelicals, though. Sometimes I look back on my childhood and just think “wtf?”

That being said, Mephismon is the sort of lackey you’d expect Millenniumon to have, much more in the vein of Devimon or DarkKnightmon. Aka, pretty darn scary. I was so frustrated for so long by all the small fry Digimon Taichi “struggled” with by himself for no apparent reason - they felt like filler episodes, tbh - filler for a show that has no reason to have filler!

And I STILL do NOT understand why we got WarGreymon’s evolution over a totally forgettable nobody Digimon, but these recent episodes with Koushirou, Mimi, and Yamato have all been serious crises where the characters put everything on the line, and yet nobody evolves. It’s not that I think they HAD to evolve here - I can see they’re leading up to it and since that guarantees more focus on them in the future, I’m totally down for that. What I don’t understand is why Taichi DIDN’T get that. Why play WarGreymon so early? The episode itself did involve Taichi challenging himself, but it all felt so setup. And so unmemorable that it’s just hard to care.

Anyway... I’m ranting about things that didn’t happen in this episode. Rant over xD Back to Yamato.

His desperate play to rescue Gabumon by himself goes as well as you’d expect.

Yamato: I’m too cool for this shit

He is chased by those gas mask-wearing Digimon whose name I forget. But they are conveniently blown back by the gush of a timely geyser. Geyser, you say? That means hot springs must be nearby. If hot springs are nearby...

Jou: Now I know what it feels like to be Team Rocket!

Jou falls out of the sky and right into Yamato’s path. Dressed in nothig but a towel, he looks to Yamato like a scrawny, nerdy, guardian angel.

Yamato: You’ve gotta help me, Clarence. Fly me to the top of the mountain.

Jou: I can’t, I haven’t got my wings.

Yamato: Yeah, you’re about what I’d expect my guardian angel to be like...

So, Jou immediately starts to chatter at Yamato, and it looked to me like Yamato might be getting annoyed. If this were 99 Adventure, he’d had snapped and said something like, “Can’t you see Gabumon’s gone? Aren’t you even going to ask about that or do you only think about yourself?”

But this is 2020 Yamato, and 2020 Digimon Adventure, where the kids are all Very Nice and don’t have much in the way of flaws. That’s my number one complaint about this show so far. So Yamato just waits for the moment where Jou needs to take a breath to break and ask for his help rescuing Gabumon.

(Gomamon reminds Jou to get dressed first, thankfully.)

Up on the mountain peak, Mephismon sacrifices the Data of poor blue!Elecmon to the fragment of Millenniumon he is guarding.

At first I was like, why do Yamato and Jou know about these crystals?? But then they’re like, we heard from Taichi over the digivice. Ah, of course. I kind of miss the old digivices that pre-date smartphones :P

Yamato explains how they ended up in this situation, and I REALLY like this. They came across Mephismon sacrificing innocent Digimon on their journey to reunite with the rest of the team, and it was Gabumon who insisted they had to stay and save them. Gabumon!

So this is not the first time we’ve seen the Digimon partners take initiative this season. The lack of personal flaws and personality clashes are my least favorite part of the reboot, but the increased agency of the Digimon themselves is probably my favorite. When DanDevimon swallowed Taichi, it was Agumon’s pain that caused his warp evolution. Not saying Taichi had nothing to do with it, but the focus was certainly way more on how losing his partner sent Agumon over the edge. Now we’ve got Yamato actually arguing with Yamato because he feels so passionate about rescuing the captured Digimon.

Yamato’s not heartless, of course - he just prioritizes the people closest to him first. And I have no idea if we’ll see much more of this sort of willpower from Gabumon - it’s partly there for convenience, since no one else is around. (Last time, it was Sora who wanted to help others at their own risk and Yamato clashed with her over the same thing.) The other reason is, this is the episode where we find out how Yamato and Gabumon became friends - which is especially important for the guy who gets the Crest of Friendship - so they needed something a bit more meaty than “the proof of our friendship is I follow you wherever you go and do whatever you want.”

But I love it because it really makes them feel like partners.

Of course, Yamato can’t say no in the end, so he and Gabumon go to save the Digimon. But they’re overwhelmed.

The vision of his partner’s bony ass shrinking into the distance as bullets fly overhead will haunt his dreams always ;^;

Yamato: Once a psychic read my palm and said I have an unusually short life line. I guess she was right. But she also said I’d marry Emma Stone and have eight children.

Jou: are you sure she wasn’t just playing a game of MASH?

While Yamato and Jou plan their strategy, we switch back to the rest of the team, where the girls are having tea time.

I know I complain about this every time but WHO DA HECK decided Sora and Mimi should wear the same color scheme look what you did now they both blend into the couch

The boys talk a bit of shop, then Takeru reveals that he and Yamato don’t live together because their parents fight and don’t get to see each other because they both work so much. He doesn’t really come out and say “they’re divorced” but he says he and his brother are separated. Even though Yamato calls Takeru to talk a lot, Takeru still feels sad that there are things he misses since they live so far apart.

Taichi assures Takeru that Yamato will be fine, pointing out that Yamato had already been adventuring in the digital world for an unknown amount of time before Taichi’s group ever got there. Wow, haven’t referenced that in literally ages. I’m glad these things are finally relevant again. Also like how it seems to confirm Taichi still kinda holds special admiration for Yamato. That seemed like the route they were going way back when Yamato joined the group in episode 8, but then it wasn’t touched on till now.

Then we get the long-awaited Yamato & Gabumon origin story! Yamato appears to have arrived in the digital world in a similar way that Taichi did. He looks the same, so probably it wasn’t a huge time difference (in human world time anyway).

At first, Yamato’s like, “leave me alone. I don’t have any interest in the digital world. Where’s the exit?” And Tsunomon says, “Fine, then I will just protect you whether you want me to or not.”

Yamato: Reeeeeally wishing Ikkakumon could fly, lol

Yamato recalls how, despite his chilly behavior, Tsunomon still jumped to his rescue.

(The rescue involved Ikkakumon shooting torpedoes up the mountainside so Yamato can grab them and climb to the top. What I don’t get is why this didn’t draw Mephismon’s attention :P I guess he figured his gas mask lackeys would handle it but uh.)

Past!Yamato rescues Tsunomon, who is so touched that he is able to evolve. Yamato makes an attempt to remain aloof...

... but in the end he turns into Taichi :P

So that’s the origin story! It’s more or less what I figured. Kind of surprised we didn’t get any scenes of them in the digital world proper, since I got the impression Yamato was familiar with that world as well as this plane that seems to be a sort of interface between worlds. But maybe not, who knows.

What they try to do here is set up that Yamato is an aloof type who tries to avoid relationships. But he snaps out of it and warms up to people so fast that it’s hard to really appreciate it. Plus he doesn’t really do much to push them away other than say “leave me alone.” Eh.

Lol it’s funny because he’s strapped to the cross but because his leg fur hangs like that, from behind it looks like he’s just standing there....

Mephismon starts to sacrifice Gabumon!

A power blast of dark energy starts to pulse from the mountain, sending everyone to their knees. Jou thinks fast and hides inside his bag. Nylon is good at blocking out satanic chanting after all.

His eyes fall on... his textbooks! Social studies, chemistry, the periodic table, Japanese history memorization textbook... these useless books! Could they actually be useful?!?!?!

no.

no they couldn’t

Yamato: Ahh! That’s it, I have got to start lifting more.

But wait - Jou gets an idea. There’s something that calms him when he’s stressed and that’s... chanting passages from his rote memorization technique books x’D So he sits down and... it’s basically a throw back to the Bakemon episode in 99. I believe he’s chanting things from the Japanese history book, but as I’ve never been a Japanese kid, I’d have to do more research than I want to to figure out for sure.

He then switches to chanting the numerals of pi! He has pi memorized! x’D I don’t know why that should surprise me. He soon begins to glow with the Zen energy of a cram school trance.

Jou: 3.14159265359... 3.14159265359...

Gas mask Digimon: 3.14159265359.... 3.14159265359...

These bright ripples emanate from Jou, counteracting the evil ripples coming from Mephismon’s mountain. It soon pulls the gas mask Digimon into the trance as well.

Ikkakumon: ... I have no effing idea what is going in this episode on anymore

Jou comes out of the trance to discover the gas mask Digimon ARE NOW HIS OBEDIENT SUBJECTS. WHAT.

(see I told you you’d bow)

seriously what just happened! XD is this Jou’s mutant power

or is this something all Japanese children who survive juku can do as a result of spending so much time memorizing shit

Ikkakumon then is able to shoot a bunch better pathway of torpedoes for Yamato to climb and MEPHISMON STILL DOESN’T NOTICE

Yamato finally makes it to the peak!

Mephismon’s like, “nice try, but what were you planning to do now? You left your friend at the bottom of the mountain and I’ve got your partner. And I doubt you’ve memorized all the numerals of pi.”

He kindly creates an evil burning vortex to increased the hellishness of the landscape. He understands that a Yamato episode needs the proper ambience.

Gabumon’s about to be sacrificed to Digi-Satan lmao

Yamato steps into the pentagram and get shocked. But he presses on despite the difficulty (and the hellfire), thinking about how much his partner means to him.

He drops to his knees while Gabumon begs him to save himself.

Yamato: “You’re my... friend!”

The power of friendship destroys the pentragram and also frees Gabumon from the cross.

The Crest of Friendship glows...

Gabumon is strengthened and becomes... WereGarurumon.

:P

Yeah... seemed like a good time for MetalGarurumon but whatever.

After a cool but brief fight, Mephismon is defeated.

He appears frozen? Can Gabumon freeze stuff? Whatev. Anyway he’s frozen and then disintegrates.

Gabumon is tired but happy. Their bond is now even stronger.

Cute Takeru on Pegasusmon flies down to his brother at last.

And the others wave up to them from Komondomon. Aw. So finally the team is back together! ;__; Please let it last this time, please please please....

Kay so, overall... I liked this episode. The whole “You’re my friend!” bit would have been stronger if we’d seen more of Yamato resisting that though. I don’t really know why but the reboot seems to pull its punches a lot. I really wish they’d let the kids be mean to each other like 99 Adventure did sometimes. Being mean doesn’t mean you’re a bad person and a terrible influence on children watching your show. It just means you are human and your viewers can learn from watching your mistakes and seeing your growth. Try to understand that, showrunners :P

A missed opportunity in this episode: Yamato and Jou. I was excited that they were gonna be together because they often clashed in 99. And in the reboot as well, it was established that Yamato is annoyed by Jou, although he’s much more polite and hadn’t said anything about it till now (just stayed away from wherever Jou was until he fell asleep lol). So I thought, in this ep, we’d see them butt heads and learn to work together, something like that. But aside from the very first moment where Yamato might look a teensy bit annoyed, they just get alone fine. Idk. Not interesting.

In the end, though, the ep was clearly meant to be Yamato only and Jou was just there as a matter of convenience so the whole group would be together at the end. Since the team is finally reunited, I hope we do start to see all of them interacting in different ways that show their personalities more. Might not be the same as 99 (or, I should say definitely won’t be, at this point), but just something more than “look how well we all get along.”

Next week...

Looks to be a light and funny episode. The Burgermon were one of my fav bits of Frontier. But I’m a little nervous about this being a Jou epiosde. It’s his turn, I know, but everyone else got something meaningful. Even Mimi - though there was lots of humor in her episode, she was also major league cool the entire time. Maybe that will be the case with Jou here, but I’m not sure because 2020 Jou is a little different - more scatterbrained, more open, more talkative, less serious, less likely to act sullen... he’s quite different, now that I think about it. So I’m actually having difficulty imagining what his personal test will be in this episode. Guess we’ll have to wait and find out. Maybe it won’t even be that kind of episode anyway.

Also, just a guess, but next week is ep 39. So ep 40 maybe will be the start of something big again. It would be good timing: the team’s together and everyone’s had a chance recently for an episode to themselves...

See y’all next week! As usual didn’t check for typos :P

[calliecat93]

RvB17 Episode 7 Review: Limbo

Time travel sucks. That's all I've got for an intro, it sucks. It's confusing and makes my brain hurt and... let's just get into this before I give myself a migraine.

Overview

We start where we left off, Huggins in what we can now confirm is the heart of a Black Hole. But she's not alone. Remember in S16 when Huggins mentioned that her parents were killed by a Black Hole? Well... they're alive! And named Gerald and Cheryl. So how are they and Huggins alive? Simple, they are light. Light is information, and you can't destroy information. They also ask where Huggins brother is, who as it turns out is Muggins. Weird that he only called her a friend last season, but hey I'll go with it. But the parents are confused as the rest of the universe should be there, and the only thing that could prevent that is some kind of time blockage. A paradox, if you will. Huggins realizes what this means and is told by her parents to go at light-speed to reach where she needs to be.

Back in Season 5, Sister is talking to Doc about how to deal with Tucker. Essentially, she plans on fucking with him for as long as possible. Doc is not happy about this since Tucker is still recovering... and the fact that it sounds outright nuts. Back with the others, well... we still have the whole 'Donut betrayed everyone' thing to deal with. Sarge wants to outright execute him for it. Wash points out that Donut tried to fix all of it, but it does little to help with Grif pretty coldly pointing out that Donut stole The Hammer. Of course, none of them know that Donut tried to use it himself, but they aren't really giving him the chance to explain either, so... oh and Caboose figured out how to Time Travel on his own, so he's gone at this point.

Tucker wakes up, and Sister proceeds to fuck with him in several ways while Doc just goes 'fuck this' and leaves. Back with Huggins, she arrives at Blood Gulch and is surprised by how shitty it looks. But no one is there as this was before the Reds and Blues were sent there, so she goes forward some more until she sees Caboose. At first, she thinks that he doesn't know what she means when she asks about the paradox... until Caboose explains that they did it to save Wash and how she got angry at Grif before flying off. So Huggins explains that essentially black holes make time loop, like a circle... just go with it people. Like me, Huggins is overwhelmed before asking Caboose if they can talk.

Back with the others, Tucker seems to have bought Sister's story and says goodbye to Doc. He goes to apologize to Donut for making fun of him and at this point utterly agitated by everyone, Donut does the 'how do you know x if you never met x' spiel to snap Tucker back to normal. What is surprising though is that this also snaps Doc back to normal, so we can confirm that he isn't dead. He does remember the S16 finale fight, and about how awesome it was. And it is listening to Doc recount those events that cause Donut to do what we have been waiting for him to do for so long now: tell everyone off.

Donut goes and finally, finally tells off everyone for how horribly that they have treated him. Sidelining him, belittling him, left him for dead, etc. And he doesn't hold back even a little. No innuendos. He fully curses, even dropping the F-bomb. He outright tells Carolina to shut up when she apologizes for breaking the universe. Yes, just told Carolina to shut up. Nd the best part? He calls his armor color pink when he mentions them making fun of him about it. Yes, no lightish-red people. He outright said pink, and he is owning it. And now, here we are after Donut died, tried to reunite with his friends, was the only one who gave a damn about saving time while everyone else fucked around, and then after his mistakes went out of his way to fix them, and what does he get? Sarge trying to suggest killing him with Shelia.

With all of that now said, Donut says that once he's explained how to time travel so that they can deal with Genkins, he's done. Everyone is left speechless and in shock, as Donut walks off. Wash tells them to go after him and to apologize immediately, which while they mumble about it, they all go off and do right away. Well... Sarge asks if they really can time travel first before Wash sends him on his way too. Hot damn, now that is how you end an episode.

Review

Okay.. so... I liked the episode, but God it's confused me so much. Let's get that part out of the way first.

Huggins being alive? Yeah, we all knew that at this point and her being made of light/information makes sense. I think most of us expected her parents to be alive after the last episode. They're... okay. You can see where Huggins gets her quirks form, but I think it's pretty clear that they've gone insane from being in the Black Hole for so long. They're mainly here for Huggins to find out how to go through time, which tbf Huggins did speculate about that in Episode 7 when debating her options on getting out of the 6th Century, so okay nice subtle foreshadowing. Muggins being Huggins brother, again, had little to no foreshadowing and comes off as weird since Muggins never referred to her as such, not even in his eulogy when he assumed her dead. He just called her 'friend'. IDK, that's very minor in the grand scheme of things.

But honestly this and Huggins other scenes just... has me confused. So... a black hole send her back to before the Big Bang? Yet her parents haven't tried to leave even though they can go through time? It kinda sounds like they were expecting Huggins so... maybe there's a reason? But this mainly makes me question the Everwhen and time travel. So... I assumed that the Everwhen was a simulation, but I guess not. It's legit the past. And Doc was also sent into it, even though he wasn't caught in the paradox. So how did Donut retain his memory? I know they said that he got brought back through Chrovos' essence, so is that why? How can the Reds and Blues shift through time when they haven't entered the Everwhen? Why was losing the Time Gun a big deal if they can just jump back to S16 Episode 14? How does a black hole causing time to loop make any sense at all? I just... I don't know anymore.

Okay... let's talk about something else that won't hurt my brain. Sister and Tucker... there's not much to talk about. Won't lie, I got a giggle out of the bizarre stories that Sister told Tucker just to fuck with him. My only real issue is that... didn't they resolve their issues at the end of S16? Then again I can see Sister still wanting some form of payback, so meh. Otherwise, no real opinion and I'm glad that we didn't drag out Tucker being out of the loop for too long. Donut just being so done with everything and going through the spiel as quickly as possible was definitely worth it. Oh and Doc is back... yeah calling it now, it's O'Malley pretending to be Doc. We saw that he can do it before in S16's finale...and depending on when he took over in S16 Episode 6. I could be wrong, but I don't know... I feel like something big is still waiting.

But enough of all that. Let us talk about Donut and the moment that we have all been waiting for. Now, I will say that the Reds anger over the betrayal is justified... somewhat. Sarge has zero room to talk considering his own actions in S15. Yeah, he did ultimately do the right thing and regret it, but he still did it and couldn't promise that he wouldn't again, so no fuck you, Sarge. You're great at speeches, but you have shit room to talk. Grif has far more justification in his reaction (helps that he wasn't threatening to kill Donut) because.. yeah if Donut didn't take The Hammer, they could have resolved this before anything happened. Mind you if none of them treated him like shit and outright called him 'an empty suit of armor' he may not have, but still Grif handled it pretty maturely I feel. And Simmons... actually he didn't do anything wrong and even asked Donut if he did save them all, so he's off the hook. My point is, yeah what Donut did was wrong, but remember why he did it: everyone treating him like shit. Sarge outright called him an empty suit of armor. Seriously man, what the Hell?

The reason that Donut's 'The Reason You Suck' Speech was so effective, aside from the previous buildup these past few episodes, is because... well, he's right. They mocked him about his pink armor, and even the standard Red one he had when he first showed up. They've always been nothing but annoyed and belittling of him. Sometimes it was justified, like when he showed up in S11 but send the pilot off. Other times, like Tucker asking why they would ever listen to him in S16 were just harsh. And yeah, in Recollection they did leave him for dead. Sure Simmons was concerned, but that didn't last long and none of them ever mentioned him or considered getting his body during S8 or S10 before they found him alive. There is plenty of canon evidence to support this, and it's something that fans have been pointing out for years. And even with the betrayal, the paradox is entirely on them, not Donut. They still chose to cause it, knowing full well what could happen, so they are just as responsible for their shit situation.

Yeah, Donut did betray the group and that was wrong. To some degree, he deserved being called out, hence why I'm more okay with Grif's reaction that Sarge being a hypocrite. And no, they don't know about Donut ultimately changing his mind and trying to stop Chrovos then and there, but was too late. But they weren't exactly allowing him to explain, as per usual, even with Wash backing him up. Which BTW, Thank God for Wash. He was fully on Donut's side, Donut didn't tell him to shut up when he apologized for the multiple shootings, and Wash immediately told the guys to go and apologize. It's the kind of support that Donut needs and I think the push form Wash, along with his own frustration, finally got him to stand up to the others and tell them off. But back to my point, Donut is justified in his anger. Donut is justified in wanting to leave once he's explained everything. If no one will ever give him any shred of decency or even let him explain how he tried to correct his mistakes, yet people like Wash and Sarge got forgiven with little argument, why the Hell should he stand by them?

Final Thoughts

This episode gave me a headache. I think it's so far my least favorite episode. But that being said, I can't call it bad. Huggins is alive, everyone (except Lopez) is back up to speed, and Donut finally, FINALLY got to tell everyone off for treating him like shit for so long. That moment alone made this episode a winner for me. What's going to happen now? Hell if I know, but I am ready for it! Migraine over time travel bullshit be damned!

[deltaengineering]

Winter Anime 2019 Part 4: That’s all, folks.

Over already? This is a pretty thin season with not a lot of shows, so it’s not that surprising that there’s not many good ones either. Still, a weak showing. Oh well, let’s get it over with. There were a few decent ones in the last batch.

Circlet Princess

What: Dimwitted schoolgirl is good at some vaguely defined virtual fighting sport, changes school based on it, finds out relevant club has been abolished. Forecast says: 5 member plot incoming.

❌ I think it’s already clear this show isn’t very ambitious, and not very well written either. A game adaptation at its laziest.

❌❌ Man, this girl is STUPID. What the hell.

❌ The rest of the cast are less stupid (which isn’t hard), but that just means they’re so forgettable they might as well not exist.

❌❌ It looks cheap, and by that I mean really really cheap. The character design is ISO standard anime and it’s mostly on model, but that’s as good as it gets. The animation just sucks. That’s a death sentence for an action/sports show with terrible characters.

Bermuda Triangle - Colorful Pastrale

What: Japanese Spongebob, as in cute mermaids. Doing things optional.

❌ To make this quick, this is almost exactly Pastel Memories, only every problem is just a little less extreme. It has fewer characters, it’s looking slightly better, there’s a tiny bit more going on, the setting is mildly more interesting. That still means it is:

❌❌ 1. A boring mess in which a handful of samey girls do nothing of much interest in a location that should be unique, but isn’t.

❌❌ 2. Conspicuously cheap. It even has the same sightline problems.

❌❌ 3. Featuring a character model sheet that is “off” even under the best circumstances. This time due to the very offputting decision to give everyone blobby triangular irises.

❌❌ Unlike Pastel Memories (which was an ad for a mobile game) this is an anime original, so it really has no excuse being this lame.

♎ I find it amusing that Pastel Palettes are providing the OP for an anime, and it’s not the one currently airing that they’re actually characters in.

Endro~!

What: Kiraralike comedy thing in a generic JRPG setting.

♎ Namori character designs, so it’s like Spyce in that it just seems like the Yuru Yuri cast cosplaying a genre. But hey, Namori character designs do look good.

❌ I’m not as done with generic JRPG settings as with generic isekai settings, but it’s still a real problem since the former is now a subset of the latter. Mildly making fun of it does not improve things much either.

✅ The tone is cutesy and pleasant. I find this much preferable to something like Mahoujin Guru Guru, which is pretty much the same thing but with abrasive, high-intensity slapstick instead.

✅ It’s backing that up with generally high-quality, agreeable pastel looks.

❌ Not being annoying is a start, but beyond that this seems very middle of the road and predictable. I don’t get much out of the genre “parody” and simply being cute is still not an unique selling point in anime.

Grimms Notes The Animation

What: Did someone say JRPG? This is a mobile one, vaguely based on fairy tales as the title implies.

✅ This universe runs on the idea that every NPC’s fate is controlled by a preset story they’re aware of. You could make a good story about that if you took it seriously. It even does that somewhat, but only to the degree that you’d expect from a throwaway sidequest in a moderately well-written JRPG.

❌ And the reason for that is that it has to make room for being a JRPG, of course. Read: It’s irritatingly mechanics- and combat-focused. Stuff like the characters changing form when in fights just seems overly complicated and adds nothing.

❌ Said combat looks competent, but not good enough to make up for detracting from what could have been an interesting setting. Merc Storia did this aspect far better (by usually not doing it at all).

❌ So it ends up being better than expected, but then that only amounts to a disappointment.

Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai / Kaguya-sama: Love Is War

What: Kaguya and Miyuki are in the student council of a prestigious school and HATE HATE HATE each other. Specifically, they hate the part where the other one won’t just finally admit their love.

✅ The joke here is that it’s operating on full intensity at all times, over the most simple matters. It’s pretty much Kaiji, only about dating - complete with hammy narrator. This is another one of those shows where I can’t say with certainty that it’s solid, but I had a blast during the first episode.

✅ Regarding Quintuplets, I made it clear that I love me some sparks in my romantic comedies. It doesn’t get much more explosive than this.

✅ The characters are comparable to Quints too: Smart scheming upstart vs. rich scheming ojou, with a simpleminded girl in the middle that ends up winning more often than not simply by not overdoing it.

✅ The visuals are just as over the top as the proceedings depicted. Occasionally a filter massacre, but mostly cool.

♎ The long-term viability of this show depend entirely on whether they can consistently come up with scenarios that work, which isn’t a given. Also, this is so intense it might become tiresome - I already felt some fatigue towards the end of the first episode. We’ll see, I guess.

Kakegurui ××

What: Some weirdos think they can crash the party at Hyakkaou with an intent to scare the daylights out of Yumeko and Midari, of all people. Let’s just say they were not as prepared as they thought.

✅ As you might have guessed by me watching the sequel, I liked Kakegurui. It has its problems, but if you’re down for some crazypants madness, this show delivers.

✅ This is one of the better episodes of it too, because it gets right into it and the game they play is dead simple. Kakegurui was never about smart moves or strong characters, so not having anything detract from our girls deriving the entirely wrong sort of pleasure from danger is a plus.

♎ Sadly, the OP is a step down (though still great) and the ED is simply an inferior, overcomplicated version of the magnificent original one. They seem to know this too, because they play the OP cut of Deal with the Devil in its entirety for a montage. The rest of the production is on par with the original though, so it’s fiiiine. Oh well.

❌ It got Netflix’d again and the subs situation is dire. Since this is one I actually like, I might have to wait for the official release.

Kouya no Kotobuki Hikoutai / The Magnificent Kotobuki

What: Piston-engined fighter plane pornography.

✅ This delivers where Girly Air Force failed: Close to zero exposition, the majority of the episode is just planes dogfighting with barely any talking either. And that part is executed really well. I think the plane startup sequence alone is as long as the total of Girly’s airtime.

✅ Guess what, it’s Tsutomu Mizushima, previously known for unbridled panzer (und girls) pornography, and boy can you tell. However, this cuts out a lot of GuP’s bullshit: A plane doesn’t have the cast of K-ON in it, it’s not over-the-top zany, and whatever this universe is, it can’t be as insipid as GuP’s. The classy milwank exists you guys, we found it.

✅✅ The music really helps here, sky pirates vs zeppelins just wouldn’t work without some classic swashbuckling orchestra background. Fat sound mixing on the dakka too. It’s great.

♎ Can’t really say much about the narrative because we kinda skipped that in this episode aside from the obvious, but Mizushima’s Shirobako collaborator Michiko Yokote is writing it, and that’s a good sign.

❌ Now we’re getting to the elephant in the room though: There’s no way the planes wouldn’t be CG in 2019, but the characters are CG too, and their animation is mediocre. Also, they did the KADO thing where they 2D-animated the side characters that aren’t important enough to model. This has the funny side effect that you can tell who’s going to die real soon by them looking better. It’s far from great, but probably a worthy tradeoff if the mechanical side is this extensive and also delivers.

✅ This is definitely not for everyone, since you have to have more than a casual appreciation for those magnificent girls in their flying machines. I do, though.

revisions

What: A chunk of Shibuya gets teleported to the dystopian future, local doomsday prepper gets handed a large robot because he’s special.

❌ A Goro Taniguchi joint being a poorly conceived scifi mess? Say it ain’t so! I especially dig the tryhard English jargon (mecha: “String Puppet”, monsters faction: “Revisions”, particular monster, I think?: “Civilian”, tacticool operetah: “Balancer”).

❌ Works very hard to characterize the main character, to the detriment of everyone else. A for effort, but you made an unlikeable asshole though.

❌ This is another full CG show, with the quality of the animation being curiously variable. Sometimes it’s well above average and sometimes it’s painful. There doesn’t seem to be much method to it.

✅ Tries to establish stakes by being mondo edgy and graphically murderizing some poor bystanders. It’s adorable.

❌ If you’re really jonesing for some mecha, you can watch all of this on Netflix right now. It’s not like you have any alte- wait, Egao no Daika has mecha too. Well there you go then. That’s a better show.

[grayisholi]

@ the DND ask game: ALL OF THOSE QUESTIONS, I CAN'T CHOOSE!! XD (or if not that, the ones you rlly wanna do!!

BOY OH BOY OH BOYIve been answering these throughout the day and I’m too lazy to reread the full document so sorry if I’ve left gaps or whatever but here it is! All 35 questions about dnd! Matt you unstoppable Madman.

1. A favorite character you have played.

You can’t just make me pick between my children!!! I think I might have to say Atticus Sallow, my faeborn bloodhunter, partially because he’s like 100% homebrew content which I LIVE for, but also because he’s probably the most kinda self-insert character I’ve ever played? Almost became the kinda angsty, brooding asshole character before he was like “get your shit together” and learned that loving people isn’t so bad.

2. Your favorite character that someone else has played.

I almost, ALMOST had the pleasure of DMing for @no-more-good-omens and their character was gonna be SO RAD and I’m a little heartbroken he never came to be. A half-drow paladin of Vecna, pretending to be your typical good and wholesome paladin? Dude, I love that kinda two faced backstabbing in a player. It’s such a shame it never came to anything (although if yall still wanna play hmu ;))

3. Your favorite side quest.

Ooh, there’s been so many good ones. Probably when i was playing as Adrian Smirks and went off on a tangent to rescue his brother ? That was the first time I ever got to see Adrian’s more raw and emotional side beneath the suave mask he wears and it was fun to explore his character in that way ^.^

4. Your current campaign.

That I’m DMing? It started inspired by Guy Fawkes and was gonna be “your party blows up parliament” but I got bored of following historical accuracy so it ended up being “blow up the palace in a magical city that just happens to be called London”. I accidentally wrote myself into a hole with this campaign tho, so once they’ve finished this arc I’m handing over the DM hat to my sister @philosophical-wanton because she seems to love it and I kinda miss being a player lmao. I can’t wait for it.

5. Favorite NPC.That I’ve written? Probably Hai Shen, the youngest son of a group of circus performers who were killed and the party got blamed for their murder. He had such a great attitude and his dynamics with the party kicked ass. And the twist that he was actually dead the whole time and it was his soul that had stayed behind to help solve his family’s murder? ICONIC.

6. Favorite death (monster, player character, NPC, etc).

NPC death would probably be Hai Shen, actually. After the party had brought the real killers (A cult to the demon Prince Orcus) to justice, Hai’s time on earth had come to an end. He had really beautiful moment with the party before being reunited with his family. Alternatively, the time I broke my entire party’s hearts? “Artagan’s staff comes cracking into Ellios’ chest, forcing him onto the ground. Artagan raises his sceptre in hand, pointing it menacingly at the young prince. And for the first time, you see him. Like, REALLY see him. He’s not the strong and powerful leader you’ve all come to know him as, he’s not Prince Ellios of the Four Realms. He’s just a boy. A boy who is much too young to be involved in such a grand scheme. And the fear in his eyes. You see the fear he’s managed to keep buried for so long, finally coming to the surface. And then? You don’t see anything, aside from his cold body hitting the ground.” I got punched three times for that moment, but GOD was it worth it.

7. Your favorite downtime activity.

Like in game? A healthy lil bit of vandalising the local law enforcement buildings is always a good time.

8. Your favorite fight/encounter.

Aw man, how can I pick ? I gotta say, that one time we, a level 6 party, managed to take down two earth elementals was pretty rad. The DM kind of expected it to be one of those encounters that we saw and immediately tried to run from, but what she didn’t take into account was that ALL of us had chaotic alignments so we just went crazy. The DM was rolling really badly (thank God) and we were getting really creative (“I use the produce flame centripetal to light my bottle of ale on fire and create a molotov cocktail” “you do WHAT”) and after like an HOUR we won and it was amazing. The rush I got from that victory was better than any drug my dood.

9. Your favorite thing about D&D.

I know I say it a lot, but I legit can’t choose. There’s so many great things about ttrpgs that a lot of people don’t really think of. The creative fulfilment I get from a session is incomparable, the friendships you can build that you couldn’t form in any other way. And like, not to get too real for a sec here, but I grew up with undiagnosed autism and didn’t understand how a lot of social situations worked, and DnD was such a good mechanic for me to try communicating with people without many real world consequences, and I appreciate that experience so much. It’s just such a great thing my dood.

10. Your favorite enemy and the enemy you hate the most.

Can they be the same thing lmao? I mean, I’m obviously partial to Count Cassius, the vampire lord that Adrian slept with lmao. I also always appreciate a good beholder, until I get hit with three disintegration rays IN A ROW.

11. How often do you play and how often would you ideally like to play?

We’ve got kind of a monthly schedule with my main campaign, and I manage to get a couple online games in-between them, but honestly I’d kill to be the kind of group that got together every weekend.

12. Your in game inside jokes/memes/catchphrases and where they came from.

Oh MAN. “I say we do this.” “Yeah, but that’s coming from the guy who decided to tie 3 50ft ropes together to escape the palace.” “iT wOrKeD dIdN’t iT ???” i.e that time I forgot I gave the gnome rogue flying boots so when I planned for them to get arrested at the palace, they managed to escape by tying their ropes together, sending the gnome with it to the top and climbing the wall. I had to improvise the rest of the session. Also “FLINTON BELINDA SKINTON” bc as a role-play exercise I got my party to come up with rumours about their characters and the gnome rogue called Flint AKA Flinton B Skinton decided that one of their rumours was that the B stood for Belinda, and it was GLORIOUS.

13. Introduce your current party.

My current group consists of Flinton B Skinton, gnome rogue. He’s a quick-fingered, silver-tongued gay disaster who can sell anything to anyone. He’s a charming flirt, and a veritable genius in his own right. Kava Daardendrian, dragonborn ranger who loves nothing in life more than her animal companion - her pig Snortin Norton. She’s fun and sassy and shameless, she’s great. There’s Sparks, the fire Genasi Monk, and full embodiment of a disaster lesbian. She drinks, fights, and gets laid, and doesn’t deal with her problems in healthy ways. An icon. And finally Milo, the halfling Bard who falls in love at the drop of a hat and just wants everyone to get along. I call them “The Shenanigang” and I love them.

14. Introduce any other parties you have played in or DM-ed.

A party I joined late? We had Sylvia Moondrop, the half elf sorcerer who was just trying to get along with everyone despite what the world seemed to want. Orland the half orc bard who was just trying to shake off the Barbarian stereotype his family left him with. Rose Morleen, air Genasi fighter who was literally born to kick ass and take names. I joined as Mason Terrai, the Earth Genasi Alchemist with a perchance for explosives. The very definition of chaotic neutral.

15. Do you have snacks during game times?

Of COURSE. What manic wouldn’t ?

16. Do you play online or in person? Which do you prefer?

I used to play online a LOT back before I had friends who were into dnd, but I VASTLY prefer playing in person. The chemistry that’s built not only amongst the players, but also the actual characters themselves is unparalleled. It’s just such a great experience.

17. What are some house rules that your group has?

Anyone can attempt anything, the only restriction is the dice. Don’t question the DM unless it’s out of session, then bully the dm on the groupchat until he’s so pissed off he gives you inspiration just to get you to shut up. And also canon lore and canon rules are bullshit when it’s convenient. That’s about it

18. Does your party keep any pets?

Our ranger, God bless her, has her pack pig Snortin Norton, sold to her by one Flinton B Skinton. And Flint really wants a monkey, he’s been trying to find one for ages.

19. Do you or your party have any dice superstitions?

Not really ? I’m the kind guy that if my dice rolls a 1 I will bench it for a bit, but tbh all my dice are cursed af and I’ve kinda just learned to roll with it by making my characters canonically terrible at everything lmao.

20. How did you get into D&D? How long have you been playing?

Aw man I can’t remember when or how, it’s been so long. I had a couple friends who were kinda into it, but all the games they tried to run were complete disasters. I only really started playing I’m the past year or so? Maybe a little more ? Adrian was my first character, and he was a very RP heavy character in a party of tanks and they all hated him but MAN was it fun.

21. Have you ever regretted something your character has done?

Oh all the time. One time my character was careless and didn’t check for traps on a legendary artefact and it lead to the death of a party member. One time my character got angry at his party and walked out. My characters don’t make good decisions, but that’s part of the fun.

22. What color was your first dragon?

White! I thought it was silver at first and went to go say hi, and it clawed me within half my HP straight away lmao.

23. Do you use premade modules or original campaigns?

Oh dude, original all the way. I live for that shit.

24. How much planning/preparation do you do for a game?

Depends on the session, but usually a good few hours, couple of days if I’m DMing.

25. What have your players done that you never could have planned for?

“You wake up in a mysterious forest. The strained autumn sun shines through the trees. The only thing you can see it each other, the trees, and an old sign post leading to a path that says "Myrrill” on it. What do you do?“ "We walk in the opposite direction of the sign deeper into the forest.” “…of course you do.”

26. What was your favorite scene to write and show your characters.

I wrote a full carnival show one time for them to watch, and then it got derailed when a horrific monster attacked. But writing all the characters and their acts, and watching my players get entranced as I described it ? Magical, my dood.

27. Do you allow homebrew content?

I live and breathe homebrew content. I don’t know what my games would be without it. I LOVE homebrew.

28. How often do you use NPCs in a party?

I make some pretty sick characters if I do say so myself, so I throw them in a LOT.

29. Do you prefer RP heavy sessions or combat sessions?

Oh dude, role play all the way. Fighting and killing stuff is great, but role-play is just so good. We can go from laughing with a bartender to crying over a backstory reveal and it’s just beautiful.

30. Are your players diplomatic or murder hobos?

Depends on the party, but i find the best players are a little bit of both XD

31. What is your favorite class? Favorite race?

Official ? I’m a fan of the hexblade warlock? Bards are always a good call, and to be real playing monks make me feel like an absolute badass. Race wise, there are just so many. If we’re only talking players handbook stuff, half elf is always rad. Outside of that? I’ve been researching the Shadar-Kai lately and I’m LIVING. They’re so rad.

32. What role do you like to play the most? (Tank/healer/etc?)

What would you call the disaster gay? I don’t really gear my characters towards usefulness in combat, so it’s just whatever the class happens to lend itself to.

33. How do you write your backstory, or do you even write a backstory?

I usually write my character, personality, backstory, alignment etc, before I even pick a class or even a race. I basically just make OCs and apply them to dnd rules, and it’s SO much fun. 10/10, would recommend.34. Do you tend pick weapons/spells for being useful or for flavor?

FLAVOUR. My party usually hates me, but what I lack in combat utility I more than make up for in creative out of combat skill checks XD.

35. How much roleplay do you like to do?

Boi, I even RP my combat, and the great thing is it rubs off on my party too. I’ll have a really low initiative and everyone else will be like “I attack and do 10 points of damage” but then on my round I’m like ��I use my staff to leap across the battlefield towards the opponent and launch out with a spinning kick to their jaw” and everyone else is like “oh, okay, that’s what we’re doing.” and the battle becomes so much more dynamic and cinematic, it’s amazing !

[weaimtomaim]

☠️

Send me a ‘☠’, for a drabble about how my muse would react to finding yours dead.

... You have 1 new message

Hey. So we found our Megatron. Everything’s good I think? Well most things are. He didn’t lock us up again or anything so that’s nice.

I think you know by now I’m not good at this kinda thing so.

We can’t be in contact anymore. With you being neutral and also dealing with Autobots, liability and fraternization blah blah... yeah.

So I guess that’s it. If we’re not dead by the end of all this, let’s go get a drink. And maybe set the bar on fire. It’ll be fun, promise.

And if I do end up dead (because let’s be honest that’s probably what’ll happen) then... I dunno. It was good knowing you? Rotary frames are rare and you weren’t one of the annoying ones. 

Finally.

Finally things were starting to make sense again. They found their Decepticon comrades, the high command, Megatron… the weight of not knowing what the future held for them was lifted. Now they had direction again; they could fight with the support of the Decepticon army backing them. Things were how they were supposed to be.

They were meeting with Megatron. Their submitted logs and call transcripts had been poured over for any useful information and cross referenced with what the Decepticons had already. Some of what they’d submitted didn’t paint them in the best light. Though they didn’t show it outwardly, an anxious feeling drifted between their gestalt bond as they’d waited for their audience with Megatron.

Fortunately, it was going rather well. No accusations of treasonous behavior or declarations of them no longer being of use to him. “While this multiverse has made our operations more difficult at times, we will continue as normal unless we are forced to change trajectory.” Megatron’s commanding presence certainly hadn’t diminished in their absence. “The Autobots from our dimension are the priority, but any who should cross your path are to be met with lethal force.”

Vortex rolled his optics to himself. Dead mechs didn’t make for good interrogation subjects. Not that Megatron had utilized those skills of his for a while now. It was usually Bruticus he wanted. Which, fair enough; the guy was an 80ft tall war machine that could level cities. 

“And what of any neutrals?” Onslaught asked. “They’re quite numerous here.”

Megatron waved a hand. “They are of no consequence unless they are Autobot sympathizers, in which case I expect them to receive the same treatment those they adulate would get should you come upon them.”

Onslaught bowed his head, “Of course, Lord Megatron.”

This was so boring. Tailing an Autobot was bad enough and having to do it with Blast Off didn’t improve the experience. Vortex had been eager to test out the cloaking device Swindle gave him specifically for this mission (even if it was reminiscent of the one Starscream had, ugh), but he didn’t think he’d be using it to hunker behind some rocks while they waited for the Autobot’s rendezvous to show up.

They’d better hurry up though, because the cloak didn’t last forever and even a flicker could draw attention to himself. Somewhere on a clifftop above and behind him (and with the much better hiding spot) was Blast Off, prepared to provide cover fire in case things went south.

It would be sorely needed if a fight broke out. The sparse rock formations could hardly be considered suitable cover and the pathetic excuse for foliage wasn’t even worth mentioning. 

The air began to displace not far from where the Autobot stood, drawing both their and Vortex’s attention. An unnatural light cast a green glow across the vicinity. A swirl of color grew until it became a tunnel large enough for most mechs to fit through and coughed up what had to be the second person of interest.

The portal closed and Vortex tried to get a better look as well as listen in on what the two were saying. Rotary frame, green and grey, visor, mask… they looked familiar.

Way too familiar. That was definitely Blackguard. The Blackguard he hadn’t spoken to for months now, maybe longer. The Blackguard that was a neutral and currently seemed to be on good terms with at least one Autobot.

And of course, because things always went from bad to worse whenever the Combaticons were involved, the cloak began to fade. So there stood the copter, only half hidden, his color scheme definitely not doing him any favors in this environment. Before Vortex could even consider his next course of action, he saw both Blackguard and the Autobot turn to look his direction, and the decision was made for him.

The Autobot had their gun trained on him in an instant. Blackguard was hesitating. Fine by him, just made this easier.

Vortex brought both arms up to shield himself best he could from the incoming gunfire. A shot from Blast Off flew by overhead and hits its mark, dropping the Autobot in one go. With that taken care of, he stepped out of his hiding spot. Vortex skirted around the fresh corpse and rose back to his full height. And was face to face with Blackguard.

She sputtered for a moment, like her processor had only just managed to connect the dots that her optics were seeing. He could tell she said something– his name? Doesn’t matter. Don’t listen. Don’t think about it.

Weapon pointed at her spark chamber. All he had to do was shoot.

He hesitated.

Did he have to kill her?

That thought immediately triggered a sharp pain in the back of his head that turned into an icy chill as it traveled down his back. A voice admonished him. Go against direct orders from Megatron? Are you crazy? Do you want to get locked up again?

No, not that, anything but that place again–

Another voice filled his head, ::Vortex! Either shoot or move, but don’t freeze!::

Then Blackguard spoke again. This time Vortex heard her. “Vortex, it’s me. You know me, I’m not a fighter. Just– let’s just take a step back–”

You know what you have to do.

Vortex snarled, “Shut up!” He took the shot.

The immediate aftermath was a blur. Something that sounded like strained words came from Blackguard. Then she was down on one knee, clutching at her chest. Another shot rang out and Vortex didn’t know who it came from. That had been enough to make Blackguard crumple the rest of the way to the ground.

And then there was silence.

Vortex didn’t move. He stared down at Blackguard. The energon pooling from her wounds spread across the ground and began to mix with the Autobot’s. He told himself this was to be expected. They were in the middle of a war; people died all the time. It was inevitable that some of them would be ones you knew.

But it’d never been a friend before. And not by his own hand.

Not many people tolerated Vortex, and even fewer actively liked having him around. Blackguard had been one of those people.

And now she was dead.

Somehow Blast Off was next to him, grabbing him roughly by the arm and starting to physically drag Vortex away. “That’ll be us if we continue to stick around. The Autobot was calling for backup, we need to leave. Can you fly?” There was something in his voice that almost sounded like concern.

Vortex continued to stare at Blackguard’s form as he was pulled away, like he couldn’t quite believe it was real. He realized Blast Off was expecting an answer and nodded his head.

“Then transform and let’s get out of here.” Blast Off relinquished his grip and took his own advice. Vortex’s body seemed to move of its own accord and he soon found himself following suit and speeding away from the scene.

[journeysintowebcomics]

Homestuck Liveblog #153

UPDATE 153: All the Pieces are Here

Last time Gamzee had completely fooled Terezi, and by extension, me. Yeah, he’s right now beating her with no remorse at all, and it’s awful to see. Yikes. Also, Jane is now asleep but her body, still under control of the tiara, has latched on Aranea like a tick. So let’s continue from there!

Writing this paragraph before starting. I’m predicting there’ll be a minimum of dialogue, the next fifty pages should have lots and lots of images. It’s bound to pass through real fast, isn’t it? Maybe I’ll go for 100 pages.

All these glitches make everything more ominous, in my opinion. It’s as if the world is going to shatter into pieces in any moment. Chances are that won’t happen, but who knows, maybe the end of Homestuck is the glitches making the universe explode. Thanks for nothing, Lord English, destroyer of paradox space.

Because Jake’s death wasn’t heroic or just, he revives, this time without hope powers. He is also right beside Terezi and Gamzee, just...watching. Gamzee continues hitting as hard as he can, dang. I’m kind of glad the glitches are obscuring the situation a bit. Rose, horrified, shouts for Gamzee to stop.

ROSE: Or, wait.  ROSE: Is this some sort of blackrom thing?  ROSE: I certainly hope not.

What the—Rose! This isn’t the time to be wondering if this is an obscure and weird alien romantic ritual! Stop standing there, go help Terezi! Even if it were a black romance thing, I think no one wouldn’t blame Rose for intervening. Terezi is getting her face smashed against the pavement. Anyone would intervene.

ROSE: I am the actual worst auspistice who ever lived.  ROSE: THE ACTUAL WORST!!!

Damn right you are; you’re just standing there! And Jake isn’t really doing much better, he’s just standing there and watching Terezi being suplexed. I know in real life a lot of people stand around and do nothing when they see someone being attacked or anything, so it isn’t something that came out of left field, but this is still rather frustrating to see. Gamzee slams Terezi so hard against the concrete it breaks, and she’s now hanging over the lava. Augh.

Kanaya and Karkaroni arrive right in that moment, finding Terezi in danger. There’s a rather cool sequence of lava seeping into the Skaia in Jane’s fork, and Jake and Rose finally intervene. Jake does it meekly, just asking Gamzee to kindly stop killing Terezi -- ...fine, Jake, you do that – and Rose takes a more hands-on approach, getting her wand ready. About time, Rose! Tge blast misses and impacts near Jake, making him fly away. Karkaroni had enough, he brandishes the sickle and swears to make a fight. Up on the building, Aranea struggles to pick up Brain Dirk’s katana with her psychic powers – no idea how that didn’t vanish away as well -- and then she arrives.

The Condesce is pissed. Oh, gee, who’d have thought that derailing the session like this would make her angry? Haha! Do you have a plan to counter the Condesce, Aranea? Did you expect her to arrive so soon? Everyone who is in the session seems to have converged in one place, this is getting good!

Aaaaaand because Hussie is like that, right when it gets good, it’s time for the so-called main act of Act 6 Act 6.

Oh, jolly. Well to his credit I’m happy it was now and not in middle of the intense events that are likely to happen. Now that’d have been annoying. Better get this Caliborn thing out of the way before things happen here in Jade’s planet! Besides, I admit I’m a bit curious how much Caliborn has progressed now.

Looks like he’s confident enough to mess with the manga book. Why do I have this strange sense of foreboding...again? I have it all the time when it’s about Caliborn, haha...okay, let’s get done with this. What artistic work do you have to show now, bud? As usual, here’s the warning: there’s a chance I won’t have much to comment about Caliborn’s antics. By now, dear readers, you may be aware I’m not a diehard fan of him. By now I tolerate him, but I’m not exactly reading his sections with excitement. Once again, I’m sorry for that.

Looks like Homosuck is getting into its equivalent of Act 5. There are the trolls. Krabkrab, Honk Friend – ‘friend’?! Is there something you’d like to share with the class, Caliborn? – Cape Douche, Smelly Horse Man, Other Guy, and Bull Horn Wimp. Oh, and all the female trolls, too, with no pejorative name other than ‘tha bitches’. Hah! Saw it coming.

The Beforus trolls are just everyone flipped and with a negative color scheme. Yeah, that’ll do...for the five seconds the trolls mattered. All these pictures go to the trash, because Caliborn has something better to show.

Hah! Okay, you got my attention, Hussie. Man Gaka Extraordinare! I’m amused, this may be worth a read, after all!

IT'S GOD'S GIFT. TO "THE YAOIS". MY RESEARCH TELLS ME.

Do you know that feeling of morbid curiosity one feels when one hears about something awful having happened in a video, and one wants to see how bad is it? Yeah, that’s what I’m feeling. I really like the giant watermark, though. That’s a good one, Hussie.

Well, to Caliborn’s credit, he has improved a lot from his first drawings, and he followed all the instructions about how to draw manga. Never let it be said Caliborn doesn’t motivate himself to improve himself!

This is truly “the yaois”. Manga Dave and Manga Karkat are here. What they do, hm, well, let’s say they’d both be upset to know how they’re depicted here.

IF YOU'RE CONFUSED, BASICALLY THE IDEA IS. YOU PRETEND THEM TO LOOK MORE LIKE GIRLS. TO MAKE IT LESS WEIRD FOR EVERYBODY WHEN THEY DECIDE TO TOUCH EACH OTHER. 

So that’s the key to draw manga. Haha! I know a handful of people from my school that’d have taken serious offense by that! Always with the finger on the pulse, Caliborn, eh?

Oh god, it’s American Comic Book Superheroine anatomy! We’re doomed. But yeah, other than the improved drawings, it doesn’t seem like this section of Caliborn’s intermission won’t differ much from the rest. Same old, same old, in terms of theme. The gals are dying in bloody ways. Yeah.

“Registered by the government as my legal artistic possession” Caliborn, you liar, there’s not even a government anymore.

SHE ACTUALLY THOUGHT SHE WAS GOING TO BE RELEVANT. KEEP DREAMING BITCH!

Right. So Caliborn may still have access to the radio tower? He knows what happened in the ghost bubbles. Well, not that it matters that much right now.

Oh my god, Caliborn has an OC.

...that is not what I expected. Dear reader, imagine that this here is what’s destroying paradox space. Imagine the big bad, Lord English, looks like that. Good thing he doesn’t, eh? Yeah, the skull, the hulking figure, and the billiard eyes does wonders when it’s about making someone threatening.

John arrives in middle of Caliborn’s games with his OC, and isn’t happy at all to see Caliborn. Thought so, what after seeing the kind of playing Caliborn does with those bad drawings of his friends.

HEY ASSHOLE, I'M TALKING TO YOU!

Oh, wow, he’s furious! I admit I underestimated how angry John would be. But yeah, another intense staredown. I’ll just...skip to the end of that sequence of images, thank you.

you're the one who vriska and her pirate pals are all trying to stop! it was you who put all this into motion in some way i don't really understand! which means you're responsible for like a trillion people dying, and universes blowing up, and all my friends getting scattered around and acting like idiots, and my dad being dead!

...huh. Well, that’s certainly...a bold accusation, John, and without anything to back it up, too. If what John said partly influences Caliborn to start doing everything he did once he was Lord English, hah, I wonder how John would react to that. It isn’t too farfetched to have that possibility in mind, I’d say, but if that were true, it’s possible there’ll be a second John to tackle the first one soon.

Turns out Caliborn is saying his monologue loud enough for anyone around to listen! I thought the narration was just text, not that Caliborn was actually saying it. Hah! It’d be kinda endearing if it didn’t come from Caliborn.

And then comes ‘game over. A flash file in Caliborn’s intermission. Um, well, that sounds a tad promising! Flash files are almost always great, I don’t see why this would be any different, Caliborn or not.

I’ll stop for now.

Next update: five updates

[omgnsfwisnsfw-blog]

NSFW #07: Second Chance

One last check. John Bishop Church and Mike McGuire stood before the vanity mirror of a makeup table. John winced slightly as he adjusted the knot of his tie so it laid flush against the collar of his dress shirt. In the silence of this prelude, John’s soft breathing was ragged. His cheeks were pale and cool to the touch despite a layer of perspiration already accumulating on his forehead. He retrieved a handkerchief from the inside of his suit jacket and dabbed away the sweat before returning it back to its pocket. He averted his gaze from Mike even through the reflection. “Okay. Let’s do this.” “Hold up. One sec.” Mike looked to their partner with furrowed brows, an expression of genuine, heartfelt concern on their face. Reaching out, they place one hand on his arm. “It’s not too late to not do this. I mean if you want to hold off for this week I totally understand, and I bet Ashley and Iggy would too. I mean, no offense, you know that… but you look kinda awful.” “They don’t make that decision.” John looked down at her hand and smirked. The expression, imagined possibly, brought a little color back into his face. “I’ll be okay. I’ll have to be.” “If you say so, then I believe you. I mean, shit. I know how bad we both want this. Like, real fucking bad, more than anybody.” “Then, let’s show them.” The camera moved through a pair of doors into a magnificent reception hall, all vibrant, lush red and gold-veined white marble. Gilded alabaster pillars line the balcony, bordered by elegant black wrought railings. It took the viewer up the claret carpeted stairway, beneath the grand crystal chandelier, through another pair of doors into a gorgeous theater in the same color scheme, the high ceiling decorated with gilded scrolling and the seats upholstered in ruby. Finally, the camera stopped, its wielder taking a seat in the front row. The stage’s ceiling was blocked in burgundy and slopes back, the backdrop also deep red and white, the wooden planks of the stage floor slightly scuffed from years of use. The house lights dimmed, and at the center of all this majesty two spotlights hit the stage, one at each side. Into these, Bishop Church stepped into the left one, Mike McGuire the right, and the lights trailed them until they met in the center. Mike slowly, deliberately slipped her aviators off, grinning a bit. “Evening, EWC faithful. Look at where ya boys are at tonight! Check these digs out. Fancy, huh? Just perfect for a big occasion, and trust me on this- this is a big fucking occasion. And we were gonna pull out all the stops for it too. You wouldn’t believe the sheer level of ridiculous hijinx we had planned for this. But…” She gave a glance over to her partner. He, however, did not remove his shades. “Better reserved for our opponents. That is, after all, their modus operandi.For fun. Remember that? Mr. Lutter assembled a group of super friends that failed to live up to that ideal. And after a purge, he seems to have it just right.” John shrugged. “Swango. Brizzie. Don’t take that as a dismissal of your talents. Your detractors will label you inexperienced, ineffectual, and irreverent. However, at Night of Champions, they could only call you winners.” The lights rose just slightly, the ambience brightened a bit. From somewhere unseen, a soft, uplifting tune began to play. Not loud enough to be obstructive or drown out the words the pair were saying, though- just audible enough to be heard clearly. “You two got magic. The same kinda magic we had when we first started out. You literally just got your kite off the ground and you’re flying like a couple’a fuckin’ pros, and that’s badass. It’s not easy to do that, y’know. Tag teaming ain’t easy. Contrary to popular belief you can’t just throw two people together, no matter how capable, and expect them to win goddamn matches if they ain’t got a drop of chemistry. Heh, ask Merc and Jerk about that.” “You won’t get a real answer out of either of them.” And then John removed his shades as well. Normally his gaze was passive and distant but at this time, blue eyes stared at the viewing audience. Perhaps at NSFW’s opponents. “But that night. The very night that we broke The Limit, the landscape of the tag team division started to change for the better. Many will attribute it to our new Tag Team champions. Some even to Mike and myself. I would say that a bit of the credit belongs to the efforts made in the face of seemingly insurmountable adversity. So it is no surprise to me that you stand opposite of us. With the opportunity that we have been fighting every inch of the way for.” The lights brightened a little further. “You’re the challenge we’ve been waiting for. This division as it stands right now? It’s the division we’ve been wanting to fight in. And right past you? The chance we’ve been working so fuckin’ hard for, since day one. I’m pumped for it. Church is. We got electric in our veins, but… do you?” Mike’s brows furrowed, the lights dimming back down almost somberly, with a slight blue tinge. “Brizzie. You don’t have that For Fun mojo going on much right now. And I get it. I got nothin’ but respect for Nos, and I don’t blame you if your head ain’t in the game. But you gotta understand… you ain’t gonna beat us like that. Not by a long shot.” “As your fellow employers. Perhaps even your friends, we are deeply concerned with what has happened. But understand something.” He stepped forward. The lights began to brighten, the blue beginning to fade away. “Monday Night. Houston. The main event. Our very first main event. With the chance we’ve been asking for on the line. If your music plays. If you two walk out. If you get into the ring with Mike McGuire and Bishop Church, you are telling us one thing. That you are ready. The bell rings. Our concern takes a backseat. Losing this match means that we are deprived another chance to represent this division. This business means everything to me. It is the most important-” Mike reached out. Her hand rested comfortably on his jacket-sheathed bicep. “It is one of the most important parts of my life. I think I understand my partner enough by now to know that she agrees. I am not content to be on the sidelines however. That’s what losing that match will do to us. Losing means we sit back another night and watch other people take what we have earned with our blood. It would be foolish to make ultimatums. The world doesn’t end with one shortfall. But after all this time, it doesn’t feel right. So ask yourselves? With circumstances as they stand, what would a defeat mean to you? Chalk it up to inexperience. Momentum not being on your side maybe.” “Yeah. You guys are brand new, right out of the box. We ain't exactly old news ourselves, but we kinda got the ‘new car smell’ knocked off us by now. We got, in a way, more to gain from this than you two, and a hell of a lot more to lose. I don’t know how much you guys want the tag titles, but I can fuckin’ promise one thing. It ain’t near as much as we do.” The intensity of the lighting was almost at full house strength now, the coloring shed of its melancholy blue and, instead, tinged with gold. “We came here with two goals. Revive the tag team division, and be its fucking champions. I think we can consider Goal One met. Two? Like I mentioned. Runs right through the Rockin’ Dreamland you got going on. But we can’t stop. We WON’T stop. No Sympathy For Wifey- at least, not in between those bells. And I’m sorry if that seems mean. Trust me, I wish to fuck this thing with Nos wasn’t happening at all, much less now, but gold waits for nobody.” “So that is what I meant. You two come down and you forsake all of that strife for that moment in time. Iggy, Ashley, you took everything from two teams that didn’t give you a chance. We consider you two our greatest challenge.” He turned his head and addressed his partner eye to eye. “Mike, remember the last time we had a chance like this? We thought of ourselves to be the heirs apparent.” “And we came up fuckin’ short. Just by a hair, but you know what they say about horseshoes and hand grenades. We played it cool, y’know, ‘tomorrow is another day’ and all that positive happy crappy B.S. but you know what? It fuckin’ stung. And it’s a feeling I never… and I think I can safely say, WE never… want to deal with again. The fuckin’ feeling of seeing a golden opportunity slip through your fingers. We ain’t gonna let it happen again, no matter what we gotta do.” The soft gold illumination intensified, became sharper. “So come out. For Fun. And we’ll take everything you have and throw it back at you. No jokes. No time machines. No more silly names. No song and dance. No more platitudes about respect.” “This is our second shot for a shot. And it’ll be our last one, because after this one, we won’t fuckin’ well need another one. We’ve been put through a fucking meat grinder this summer. We’ve been table’d, chair’d, thrown off shit, beat to a fucking pulp, my partner damn near got disemboweled, and in the middle of all that, we’ve gone through damn near the entire division that WE rebuilt. Our literal blood, sweat, and tears are all over the fucking place.” More intense now. The entire stage was bathed in vivid golden light. “You guys got the magic, but you haven’t paid your dues. You haven’t earned it. You don’t have the rights to it, not yet.” “So we offer the same courtesy that we did to the Unholy Two. Sure, we’ve met. But we haven’t been formally introduced. Where it matters. Iggy Swango. Ashley Brizzie.” John put the aviators back on. “I’m Bishop Church.” Mike followed suit. “And I’m Mike McGuire.” “We are NSFW.” “And we’re the next EWC Tag Team Champions.” The golden light intensified so brightly that a bright, gilded flash was all that the camera could pick up. When it faded away, NSFW were gone. What does a team do after they rent out Heinz Hall for their own personal statement on their most important match to date? Go grocery shopping. John’s hands were ringed with the loops of plastic grocery bags. He let them slip from his fingers gently on the kitchen table. He also had a week’s worth of mail tucked under the opposite side of his wound. They fell out onto the table and unfolded like an accordion. Mike closed the front door behind them. They had all of the bags full of things that needed to be in the refrigerator so they made a beeline to it. He looked suspiciously at a party sized bag of peanut butter M&Ms that had managed to make it into their cart. But then something else caught his eye. One of the envelopes. “Hey. You got a letter.” She was a phone call or text away. Not too many miles between them. His eyebrows raised quizzically. But it was addressed to just Mike. So not really his business. “From Natalie.”