#forever unhinged

[popjunkie42]

My loves, my darlings, my dear hearts:

It is my one year anniversary of reading A Court of Thorns and Roses for the first time!

I have no idea how I found it: I will randomly put books in a wishlist when they get recommended to me, from friends and the internet. A good friend of mine had been cleaning house and gave me a huge gift card to our local used book shop, and I went through one day in early February just picking books randomly from my list. I read ACOTAR quickly and liked it a lot, but felt sort of meh reading about another toxic, bro-y romance lead. “Ah well,” I thought. “It’s just the way it is.” I went back to pick up ACOMAF, had a convo with the checkout girl whose eyes lit up and she told me how much she loved the series.

And then, you know. Permanent brain rot. I can truly say I’ve thought about ACOTAR every single day over the past year. I came back to fanfiction after almost 20 years (!!).

I’m in my feels this Valentine’s because I’m so blessed to be in this crazy place surrounded by so many talented, kind, funny people who are just as insane as me 😅 You know who you are and I’m so happy to be your friend!

In honor of my warm fuzzies and Valentine’s on WIP Wednesday, here’s a bit of smut from my WIP Chains below the cut!

(M for Mature NSFW and all that)

“Just shut up, Rhys.” He sucked in a gasp as I slipped my hand down the front of his pants and felt the velvet softness of his skin. My eyes were on his face, seeking reassurance and finding it in his open, panting mouth, his eyes fluttering shut. I struggled to fit my fingers around him, and I ran them over his skin lightly. He groaned and began gently bucking his hips, his length sliding through my fingers.

He was coming undone in just my hands.

Touching Rhys was like holding magic in my palms, something dangerous and wild for me to wield. Maybe my mind wasn’t ready yet for a mate, but something in my chest was vibrating at an alarming frequency as I watched Rhys lay back on the bed, his back arched, his throat moving with his gasping breaths. His magnificent, muscled chest was bare in front of me and I drank in every detail, from the sweat beading on his skin to the deep flush growing from his sternum and moving up his neck.

Watching Rhys respond to my touch was like sculpting with water, like commanding darkness. I charted his breaths, the noises escaping from his throat, experimenting and shifting my hand around him as he moved under my touch. Here the most powerful High Lord in Prythian was mine to command. All I wanted to do was to chase his ruination and watch him come undone before me, a beautiful pleasure, and a punishment. I wanted him to think of every frustrating reading lesson, every raised brow at my nascent magic, every annoying smirk he offered me as I had a struggled my way through Prythian.

He let out a groan, low and rough, and I wondered again how much that shield around the room was blocking from the two sentries at my door. I was gripping him rougher now, twisting my wrist as his hips thrust him further up into my hand. His eyes slit open, hooded and dark, and I could see the predator inside of him, barely contained.

Mine. The word rang through my chest like a bell. My eyes swept over his body. I ran my thumb over the broad head of him, over the glistening beads of wetness starting to form. I was desperate for him, to have him take and devour me, and maybe that traveled down the bond because his eyes snapped open, as black as pools of night. I leaned forward across him, to take his lips into mine and -

“Feyre?” I froze at two sharp knocks on the door, Lucien’s muffled voice beyond.

I thought Rhys might explode.

His snarl brought me back and I took my hand off of his cock to push his shoulders back down to the bed, covering his mouth. By the way he looked at me, straddled over his body, I wasn’t sure how much it mattered.

“Tell Vanserra to fuck off,” he muttered between my fingers, his voice a vicious growl.

“Don’t say anything, and he will,” I whispered back.

I felt nothing more like a child hiding my crayons under the blankets when my nurses came to check on me. I was frozen over Rhys, whose fingers were slowly digging more and more into the flesh of my thighs.

After what seemed like an eternity, we heard padded footsteps retreat on the carpet, the sentries muttering something we couldn’t hear.

A breath whooshed out of me and I dropped my head onto Rhysand’s shoulder. Although my body wouldn’t forget his warmth, his scent so close, something had curdled in my stomach.

“You’re right,” I said, muffled into his skin as I felt his breathing slow. “This is a terrible idea.”

[misspoetree]

Happy anniversary to the episode that presented us with:

Porsche and Pete physically fighting each other

Porchay telling Kim that he loves him and Kim having the most painfully awkward reaction to have ever been caught on video

Smiley Breakfast

this WASN'T THE FUCKING PLAN

the reveal of badass Kim and the Black Tank Top (of Death)*TM

Big sacrificing himself (my Big deserved better agenda will never end)

Vegas Tawan MARRIAGE PROPOSAL flashback

Tawan offing himself

A big fucking explosion

The orange jumpsuit*TM

What's in the box?!?! (It's Ken's head. Ken's head is in the box.)

Electrocuted balls and the beginning of VegasPete

Kinn literally forgetting Pete exists

And, of course:

A FART JOKE TO TOP IT ALL OFF

Episode 10, truly the most unhinged of them all.

[huachengsromcom]

People call Heaven Official’s Blessing / TGCF a slow burn but Hua Cheng is literally courting Xie Lian like they are DATING. Slow burn who??? They’re sleeping next to each other on straw mats and Xie Lian’s offering to cook him dinner and they’re bantering across THE HOME THEY SHARE like a bunch of desperate hussys

San Lang LEAVES XL WITH A KEEPSAKE OF THEIR TIME TOGETHER SLOW BURN WHOMST

They have A DATE in HC’s armoury where they HOLD HANDS and XL pets San Lang’s quivering sword I-

Hua Cheng basically throws himself at this man he’s like you want a sword?? All of them ?? You want ALL THE SWORDS?? Fuck it take the whole room THE WHOLE ROOM JUST COME VISIT I WILL CLEAN THEM FOR YOU

Like he isn’t the king of a whole realm with shit to do

And this is just the first half of the first book—again I ask the world SLOW BURN WHOMST

[daisynik7]

Nanami feels guilty having sex while the two of you stay at your parent’s house for the weekend. He claims it’s “utterly disrespectful” to his in-laws, who he respects so much. But this doesn’t make him immune to temptation, especially when you’re just so fucking good at teasing him.

So, he found a loophole. 

While your parents sleep peacefully down the hall, you and Nanami are in your bedroom, dry-humping each other to a point where nothing is dry between you. You’re sitting pretty on his lap in your most delicate panties, already damp with your arousal, leaking onto his briefs. You’ve been riding his shaft for the past thirty minutes, making yourself come again and again from sheer friction as your husband watches you with half-lidded eyes, indulging in the delicious sight before him. His cock is bulging in his underwear, a wet spot forming at the tip where his precum dribbles out. You can tell he’s almost there; he’s been hanging on the edge for a while now, waiting until you’ve had your fill, or until he can’t hold it in any longer. When you reach your climax, he comes with you this time, spilling inside his briefs, cum soaking through the fabric. You look down between you, smiling at the mess you both made, guilt-free and satiated. 

[maraslesbian]

sometimes i think about the fact that black sails took one of the most famous pirate figures in fiction and decided to make the reason he became a pirate that he was gay, and that the man he loved was killed for it. and that this loss fueled a pure and complete hatred of england and its empire, which then developed into actual revolutionary reflections and an understanding of the violence of colonization that then lead him to organize alongside former slaves and local populations to fight for the liberation of the american colonies from british rule. and it's like. what the fuck man. truly the show of all time

[s-aint-elmo]

it always tickles me that despite the fact that falin wields a literal mace as an arcane focus it's five-foot-something noodle-armed elven waif marcille with her delicately woven branch staff and bare minimum strength and constitution who is categorically more violent and destructive and unhinged. falin touden can tenderize a walking mushroom with one hit and still marcille "i cast explode your brain point blank on reflex when threatened" donato is truly something else

[literatureaesthetic]

sick of the unhinged women trope, 2024 is for soft, sensitive, complex girls instead

[ahappyphjl]

feeling very gay right now

[sherrymagic]

underrated but very important moment from DFF ep10: TanNew promptly hiding behind Jin ready to use him as a human shield as soon as Fluke, the one holding the gun, says his name:

10/10 man, what an unpologetic deranged iconic king i stan him with my life

[masterwords]

Corporate needs you to find the difference between this picture:

And this picture:

They're the same picture.

Bonus:

[cmbdragon98]

Compilation of The murder kitten of all time

[smytherines]

this fucking loser sings "I'm a master of torture" and then does the most torture 101 shit imaginable. Electrocute him with a car battery? Child's play. Pull a tooth? Day one torturing. Choke him with a chain? Ok that kinda just seems like a personal thing

[justalittleficsideblog]

Your fics of the obey me boys protecting mc from a creep are so amazing!!

If it's okay, could you write a similar one for Barb and Sol please?<3

anon I see you’ve been sitting in my inbox for a millennia, but I feel like I’ve finally now can write this fic! Barbatos in my mind is a bit unhinged, so like TW for those undertones! This went on longer than I intended, I hope you enjoy !

Barbatos

I could see this happening in the later hours of a ball that his king decided to host, caught unawares with a human he decided to invite had inevitably gotten lost in his crowd.

Considering that your usual guard dogs were preoccupied with their official business, Barbatos took it upon himself to keep a keen eye on you as you made your introductions.

Some of the demons lingered longer than necessary, but the majority quickly moved on due to the presence of the brothers all together somewhere in the room. Despite that, one particular demon cozied up to you a bit more than he found himself caring for.

“That’s very flattering thank you, but I think I’ve had plenty this evening,” you waved your hand towards the demon, gesturing politely in refusal of his offer to a drink.

You weren’t stupid, taking drinks from strangers in the human world was hardly safe, the devildom was no exception.

The demons mouth curved down slightly on the side, but he quickly recovered as he sauntered closer to you. Your back now against the pillar, your eyes scanned the crowd for an escape.

“Those brothers must be boring such a thing like you.” An elongated finger dragged lazily along your temple as he pushed a stray hair out of your face.

“The brothers are wonderful, now if you’d excuse me—“ you grimaced as the demon side stepped your attempt to skirt around him. Now pushed farther back, your irritation was plain across your face.

“C’mon. Hear me out here—“

“I do believe the lady has kindly rejected you multiple times.”

The snarl startled you, a familiar back facing you as Barbatos stepped in between you and the demon. He held a serving tray in his arm, the other arm was across his chest as he politely angled his body towards the male in front of him.

His tail gently urged you to his left, its length curling protectively around your frame.

The formerly mentioned demon scoffed, clearly irritated about the kings servent interrupting him.

“Listen Barbatos,” the demon grabbed a wad of somthing from his lined pocket, placing it discreetly in his hand. “Look the other way with the kings pet, and keep this between us.”

The chill that descended the ballroom was near paralyzing.

You didn’t dare breathe.

“Out of respect for Diavolo,” Barbatos spat, rising to his full height, his back shifting into a lethal calm. “I will not cause a scene because of this disgusting conversation. You must be unwell, considering your intellect is so skewed that you believed I could be bought out for such an act.”

The demon tensed, his foot sliding back slightly.

You’d never seen Barbatos so eerily calm. He could be unnerving in his role, but the aura he was giving off was that of a predator.

“Lord Diavolo will see to you later,” a swish of his wrist and the demon was transported instantly.

The rush and noise of the crowd and music came back immediately, and Barbatos turned to face you, bowing deeply.

“Are you harmed?”

“Uh… no. No not at all, thank you Barbatos.” Your hand reached out to take his out and make him rise.

You were at a loss for words, the lethality you had felt from him was gone, replaced with a relaxed atmosphere.

This guy gave you whiplash.

Extending his arm, he offered, “Come. Let’s get some fresh air.”

All you could do was nod.

Solomon

Honestly, the reason that you hadn’t encountered any suspicious demons was because this wizard watched you very closely. When he determined the brothers were around, he tended to let off.

But, anytime you were without one of them and he was around, he tended to ward off many a demon (he may had cast a sort of mirage around you if any ill-intended demons looked to long).

Deciding to have a bit of fun without the brothers, you had begged him to check out a new club scene that had opened up. All the students were talking about it! I’ll go anyway even if you aren’t with me!

Leaving you unprotected wasn’t an option, but he decided to play coy and tag along.

Solomon immediately disliked the air of the nightclub. The thick haze and skewed magic surrounding it instantly made him on edge. Seeing you so excited to be there, seeking out some friends from class, made him bite his tongue.

The crowd itself made him uneasy, some demons lingering looks made him grind his teeth as he steered you towards a booth to get a break.

“This place is kind of… dense.” He ground out.

“I think this’ll be fun! Oh! Let me go to the bathroom quick, one of the girls from our sorcery course needs some help fixing her look.”

You skirted off quickly. Solomon reassured himself it was fine, you had a trace of his magic he could track. He reached out to feel the tug, only—

There was nothing there.

————-

Having fixed up your friends hair, you made your way back to Solomon. Unfortunately you were intercepted, a large demon glancing down at you with wide eyes.

“So you’re the human they’ve been talking about.”

You attempted to move around him, huffing when the press of bodies halted you from doing so.

This demon was clearly intoxicated, his uneven gate and slight sway told you that much.

A grip on your arm made you flinch, moving quickly to detach the large hand from your bicep.

“Let me go, man.”

The demon flung his arms up in surrender. “Are you here by yourself? You know, this place is full of creatures that would—“

“I’m with my friends, now if you’ll excuse me.” You shouldered your way past him, ignoring his intimidating height. You looked around for the booth that Solomon and you were at previously.

Your heart thundered, where the hell was it?

“Are you a bit lost?” A grin split across his face as he leaned down, the smell of demonous reaching your nostrils. “I could help you find your friends…”

The look in his eyes told you something entirely different. Panic began to work its way up your chest and the noise and flickering lights made it hard to see against the crowd.

Suddenly, a heavy arm wrapped around your shoulders. Jolting from the contact, you looked up to see Solomon, staring down the demon in front of you.

“I do hope that you weren’t giving my human any trouble here.”

Realizing who was in front of him, the demon blanched, leaning back into a few others that were crowded behind him.

“N-not at all man, just trying to help them out is all.” He waved his claws in front of his face, eager to turn and part the crowd as he made his exit.

Satisfied, Solomon looked to you.

“What happened to that bracelet you always wear?”

Furrowing your brows you spoke. “What are you talking about? It’s right here—“

You grabbed your empty wrist in alarm. Shit! You must’ve undone it when you were helping your friend.

“It’s probably in the bathroom, here, let me go grab it quick!”

Solomon grabbed your shoulder and spun you in close to him.

“Forget the bracelet.”

“But that was a gift! I’m sure it was expensive.”

You saw his jaw tick. “I’ll get you another, you’re not leaving my sight after that.”

Clasping your hand in his, he made his way to the exit.

“How do you feel about takeout?”

A smile burst across your face.

“As long as you’re the one paying.”

Solomon laughed, grasping your hand a bit tighter.

[lambmotifz]

thinking about how dean making the deal was out of love for sam and of selfishness. he did it for sam as much as for himself. i think they pretty much blatantly said it in the crossroad blues where he and sam were once again paralleled to a married couple (dean chewing out the guy that made the deal to save his dying wife by saying “did you ever think about her in all this?” and “i think you did it for yourself so you wouldn’t have to live without her” and “guess what, she’s gonna have to live without you now”. and then he did the same thing to sam). he wanted his little brother back so bad he didn’t care about the consequences and how it’d affect sam (remember mystery spot and how dean’s death was driving sam insane?), or how sam would feel knowing his resurrection costed such a price. he just did it. because sam was always the centre of his world and he wanted him all to himself and to keep him forever. he couldn’t imagine or even handle living without sam and he didn’t care or didn’t think about sam having to live without him. and i love him for that. yes, it was selfish, but also beautiful and tragic and sexy

[princeoxca]

my gift for @thesupremequeen in the @namurigiftexchange. I hope you like it!

extra (poor namor lmao):

[bestagons]

What Dan and Phil Text Each Other 4 + Familect (article)