#ft. cady. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 7 months

Text

Napoleonville [Chapter 9: Clarence House]

Series Summary: The year is 1988. The town is Napoleonville, Louisiana. You are a small business owner in need of some stress relief. Aemond is a stranger with a taste for domination. But as his secrets are revealed, this casual arrangement becomes something more volatile than either of you could have ever imagined.

Chapter Warnings: Language, sexual content (18+ readers only), dom/sub dynamics, smoking, drinking, drugs, Adventures with Aegon (ft. Sunfyre the Ferret), Willis Warning, infidelity, kids, parenthood, and no more hints for you, start reading!!!

Word Count: 8.9k.

Link to chapter list (and all my writing): HERE.

Taglist: @marvelescvpe @toodlesxcuddles @era127 @at-a-rax-ia @0eessirk8 @arcielee @dd122004dd @humanpurposes @taredhunter @tinykryptonitewerewolf @partnerincrime0 @dr-aegon @persephonerinyes @namelesslosers @burningcoffeetimetravel-fics @daenysx @gemini-mama @chattylurker @moonlightfoxx @huramuna @britt-mf @myspotofcraziness @padfooteyes @targaryenbarbie @trifoliumviridi @joliettes @darkenchantress @florent1s @babyblue711 @minttea07 @libroparaiso @bluerskiees @herfantasyworldd @elizarbell @urmomsgirlfriend1 @fudge13 @strangersunghoon @wickedfrsgrl

Only 1 chapter left!!! 🥰🧁

He returns in an afternoon of inescapable golden sunlight, hot and muggy, bumble bees and ladybugs wheeling lazily above tall grass, cumulus clouds like tufts of cotton in a sky the color of Aemond’s eye. You hear him talking to Cadi—she’s out in the front yard making mud pies, earth for sugar and sprinkles of stray pelican feathers—and then the weight of his footsteps on the sinking, sloping porch. He opens the door, never locked, and walks through the living room into the kitchen. From behind, his arms circle around your waist; and you’ve missed him so much—dreaming of waves and storms, chains and blood—that you have nothing for him but softness, gentle smiles and a voice hushed with relief.

“How was Norway?” you ask as you roll out dough on the counter. You’re making a buttermilk pie.

“Fine,” Aemond says, resting his chin on your shoulder. But he sounds tired, low.

You turn around to look at him, raising your fingertips to his unscarred right cheek; he won’t tolerate you touching the left. You leave a dusting of flour across his skin like snow, which you have never seen in person and likely never will. The air conditioner is humming. The little pink Panasonic boombox is playing Africa by Toto. “Did something happen?”

“I just missed you.” Then he brightens. “But I was greeted by some very welcome news when I got back to the house this morning.” He’s wearing his neon teal duffle bag. He drops it to the floor and unzips it; inside you glimpse several Nintendo game cartridges, presumably for Cadi. And you think: I’m always here making things, he’s always bringing them from far away. Aemond takes two small dark blue booklets out of a pocket in the inner lining of the duffle bag and gives them to you. On the front of each is embossed in gold lettering, along with an emblem of a bald eagle: Passport, United States of America.

“…Aemond?!”

“There’s one for you and one for Cadi. I submitted the forms a month ago, but even with expedited processing it took this long. Ridiculous. What does the government do all day besides hunt down social programs to defund?”

“But…but…” You open one of the booklets. A photograph of your own face gazes back at you, serious and serene, taken against the white wall of your bedroom before you knew about Aemond being a Targaryen, or Christabel, or Amir’s exodus to San Franscisco, or the profound futility of everything, it seems. “How…?”

“I took the pictures, obviously. The rest was easy enough to find. You store birth certificates and social security cards the same place where you keep the business records that Amir showed me. Typically people have to go to a passport agency in person, but Criston and I have ways around that. Your signature might have been forged on the applications…but I suspect you won’t be filing any police reports.” Aemond grins, pleased with himself. “I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“It’s definitely surprising.” You stare down at the passports, amazed. “Aemond…this is a lot. But you already know that.”

“The whole time I was gone, I was wishing you could be there too. And now I can take you anywhere.”

Your heart is pounding, helpless childlike exhilaration. “Where are we going?”

“Clarence House in London.”

London: it’s another world, a distant planet, a constellation whose name you don’t know, the lost city of Atlantis.“Clarence House? Is that a hotel?”

“It’s a royal residence,” Aemond says, amused. “It’s officially the home of the Queen Mother, but the whole family goes to Balmoral in Scotland every summer, and while they’re gone they often rent out one wing to guests, not just anyone, trusted people like distant cousins or longtime, aristocratic friends. And the Targaryens…”

“You’re marrying Christabel, and she’s nobility. So you’re basically nobility now too.”

“Yes,” Aemond admits, a little guiltily, perhaps. “But you’re the person I’m inviting.”

“And Cadi.”

Now he’s genuinely puzzled. “Of course. We couldn’t leave her behind.”

Maybe I can handle this. Maybe I can make this work.

And you climb onto your tiptoes to circle your arms around the back of his neck, embracing him, thanking him, thinking: Christabel will have his ring, his last name, his family’s mansion, his acquiescent kiss at the altar of the Chapel of Saint Honoratus of Amiens…but I have what he’s made of, dreams, soul, bones in the abyss of an ocean of blood. Maybe that’s enough.

Maybe.

~~~~~~~~~~

First class, cheerful stewardesses, an array of magazines purchased from a gift shop in New Orleans International Airport: the National Enquirer and Food & Wine for you, The Face and Smithsonian for Aemond, and National Geographic Kids and Zoobooks for Cadi. The Zoobooks animal this month is the eagle, how quintessentially American. You are served antipasto Italiano, shrimp cocktail, Perrier, and champagne (Cadi gets a Shirley Temple) over the Atlantic Ocean. Aemond shows you and Cadi how to chew gum to pop your ears as the pressure builds to pain. When there is turbulence and he leans in close to tell you everything is fine, Aemond smells like Wrigley’s Doublemint, cologne, Marlboro cigarettes like the logo on his red and white jacket. You press your palm to the cool window, and clouds float by through the gaps between your fingers. The world is older than anything you could fathom; the world is brand new.

There is a black limousine waiting outside Terminal 3 of Heathrow Airport. The driver gets out to load the sparse luggage: Aemond’s teal duffle bag, a frayed and battered rolling suitcase that you borrowed from your mother, a Super Mario Bros. backpack that you found for Cadi at Kmart. Aemond doesn’t have much time to spare, only 4 days, practically a long weekend; but it feels like an eternity stretches out in front of you as the limousine zooms through the narrow, winding streets of downtown London, Starship’s We Built This City piping from the radio. You have never had more than a few uninterrupted hours with Aemond before. Now you will have a hundred.

The London air is cool, grey, misty; fresh rainwater bleeds into puddles, dark pools of mirrorlike reflections. With the windows rolled down and clean slate-colored air unfurling in your lungs, Aemond points to the landmarks you pass: Gunnersbury Park, Chiswick House and its gardens, cathedrals, museums, shopping districts, centuries-old cemeteries, stations of the London Underground, the River Thames, Hyde Park, the Ritz Hotel, Buckingham Palace, Saint James’ Palace, and at last Clarence House. It is a boxy white four-story townhouse with columns at the entranceway that remind you of the Targaryens’ estate on the shore of Lake Verret, the beautiful yet temporary home they call The Last Desire.

Aemond says that the entire first floor will be yours for the duration of your stay. There is the Lancaster Room, red and gold, and the Morning Room of creams and weak watery blue. There is the Library, the Dining Room, and the vibrantly pink Horse Corridor named for its ample equine paintings and sculptures; Cadi immediately proclaims this to be the best part of the house. She lingers in the hallway examining the art pieces as you and Aemond proceed to the Garden Room, which looks out upon a sea of lavender and shrubs meticulously shaped into a maze no higher than your waist. It has a golden harp and a grand piano, and a vast bed large enough for at least five people, in your estimation. I wonder if Aemond has ever tried that, you think distractedly. I wonder if there are temptations I can’t satisfy for him.

“You and Cadi can have this room,” Aemond says. He keeps wincing and bringing his hand up to the left side of his face; you doubt he’s even aware of it. “I’ll sleep on one of the couches.” Of course he will; Cadi thinks you’re just friends, and she’s aware he’s getting married to someone else. He knew exactly what it would mean when he bought a passport for her. “Queen Elizabeth and her husband Philip lived here before she ascended to the throne. They loved it so much that at first they refused to move to Buckingham Palace, which is the traditional residence of the reigning monarch. But their insolence was worn down. No one gets to break the rules.”

I shouldn’t be in this place, you keep thinking as you gaze around at the portraits on the wall, the stiff unnatural photographs of royals, the vases, the chandeliers, the fireplaces, the plush intricate rugs, the garden on the other side of the windows. People like me don’t belong here. “Aemond, are you alright?”

“It’s my eye,” he confesses with an uneasy, apologetic smirk. “Sometimes flights…the altitude changes…it aggravates the nerve damage. It’s like needles in my skull. But I’ll be okay.”

“You fly a lot for work, don’t you?” You hurt yourself for Viserys, in body and soul.

“I do,” he agrees. He unzips his duffle bag and produces a bottle of Percocet. “Why do you think I carry these around?”

“Take one,” you say. “Lie down, rest. Cadi and I can entertain ourselves for a few hours.”

He’s relieved, he’s grateful. “Are you sure?”

“Absolutely. You can even borrow the bed.”

“Back between your sheets, huh?” Aemond says, in pain but smiling through it. He draws a semicircle from the part in your hair down to your chin, a weightless sweep of his fingertips like a kind breeze. “You are incurable. You can’t resist me.”

“I have my own scheme in mind.”

“Do you?”

“Yes.” You grab the front of his Marlboro jacket, appropriate for the overcast London weather. He belongs here, this house, this city, this way of life. He wasn’t made for the primordial heat of the swamplands. You fold into him, close enough to tease, to quicken his heartbeat and momentarily clear the wounded furrows from his brow. “I want my pillows to smell like you. I want to breathe you in all night. It’s how I sleep best.”

“I’ll try not to disappoint,” Aemond says, a little stunned; but he’s elated too. For a moment, you’ve distracted him from his suffering entirely. “I’ll roll around all over them. I will mar the bedding irrevocably, the Queen Mother will never invite me back.” And he watches as you leave, his gaze transfixed and meditative and—more than anything else—hopeful.

“Hey, honey,” you say when you find Cadi in the Horse Corridor, poking a 100-year-old oil painting that she is definitely not supposed to be touching. “Let’s go explore and grab some dinner. Aemond isn’t feeling great, but we’ll hang out with him later.”

“Is it his face?”

You are startled. She knows so much. “Yeah, actually, it is.”

“He showed me,” Cadi says casually, still peering up at the horse; and you remember the day when he took her out to the front yard after she said she wished you were more like her friends’ mothers. “He even let me touch it. Radical, right? It’s so gross, but super cool too.”

Aemond couldn’t stand for me to see how he was maimed, but he forced himself to endure it for Cadi. “What did he tell you?”

“That I should appreciate having a good mom, because not all parents treat their kids right. He said his dad let his eye get crushed. And he told me he’d bet $1 million that you’d snap someone’s neck if they hurt me like that.”

You reach out to skim your fingers through her dark disheveled hair, smiling faintly, fondly. Cadi doesn’t seem to mind. “He wasn’t wrong.”

“Can we get fish and chips?”

“Totally. I have 50 British pounds in my wallet, I assume that’s enough for dinner.”

“Wow! How much is 50 pounds in dollars?”

“I have no idea,” you say. “Let’s go spend them.”

~~~~~~~~~~

In the evenings, you, Cadi, and Aemond gather around the television in the Lancaster Room and help yourself to the extensive VHS collection stocked for guests. You let Cadi pick: Raiders Of The Lost Ark, The Terminator, Firestarter, the Karate Kid, Aliens. You make popcorn in the extravagant kitchen in the basement of Clarence House and the three of you devour bowlfuls of it as you giggle on the couch, engulfed with throw pillows and playfully kicking at each other beneath the blankets. One night at Cadi’s request you bake Betty Crocker’s Party Rainbow Chip cupcakes with mix purchased at a Tesco down the street; on another you make hot chocolate to sip from antique tea cups. Each day, Aemond has new destinations picked out to tour. You ride the Underground like true Londoners to the Hampton Court Palace, the British Museum, Westminster Abbey, the Natural History Museum, Big Ben, Trafalgar Square, Tower Bridge, the National Gallery, the Kew Gardens, Imperial College where Aemond received the petroleum engineering degree he never wanted.

As he shows you the classrooms where he attended lectures and seminars—you aren’t sure what the difference is, though you can sense that there is one—Aemond doesn’t talk about math or oil drilling. Instead, he tells you and Cadi about the people he learned about in the history classes he managed to slip into his exacting schedule like splinters into flesh: Sir Harold Gillies who pioneered plastic surgery in his treatment of World War I veterans, Phillis Wheatley who was enslaved as a child and became a renowned poet and abolitionist, Boudicca who led a rebellion against the Roman invaders and upon her defeat succumbed to some tragic, enigmatic doom. Aemond loves stories like this, you can see the light that sparks into the crystalline blue of his right eye. There is nothing he deems more heroic than people who took circumstances beyond their control and made something worthwhile out of them.

The night before the flight back to New Orleans, you’re staring at the crown molding of the Garden Room as Cadi snores softly from the other end of the massive bed and silvery moonlight covers the world. You can’t stop your thoughts from roiling like the North Sea; you can’t stop thinking about desks and chairs and books and clever blue-blooded girls jotting down in their notebooks not cake orders but mathematical equations or dates of conquest. When you breathe in the smoke and cologne Aemond left on your pillows, it tastes dark and forbidden. You climb out of the bed, roomy Bob Dylan t-shirt, pink cotton shorts, hair loose and wild, bare feet.

He is outside pacing around the sundial in the center of the garden, puffing on a Marlboro cigarette and pondering the full moon. “Can’t sleep?” Aemond asks, exhaling smoke as he glances over at you.

“You must think I’m stupid.”

“What?” He stops pacing. “Why?”

“Imperial College,” you say. “And the sorts of people who go to places like that. You must have known a lot of women who could recite Shakespear and name all the kings of England, all of Jupiter’s moons. Things I never learned. Things that I have no use for. I don’t write books or design machines or study the secrets of the universe. I bake cupcakes.”

“And they’re brilliant,” Aemond says, smiling. “I don’t think you’re stupid.”

“No?”

“No,” Aemond insists. “I think that if you’d been born where I was, you would have done far more with it.”

“Aemond…” You walk across the wet cobblestones to meet him by the sundial. It’s been raining again. The night air is chilly, foggy, painting you with goosebumps. “You still have time to become who you want to be.”

“No. I don’t.”

It’s coming from somewhere, distant but still audible, a parked car or a nearby building: Kyrie by Mr. Mister. Aemond chuckles, flicks the end of his cigarette into the lavender bushes—surely against the rules—and takes your hands in his.

“I remember this,” he says as he dances with you slowly, clumsily; you don’t know the steps. Still, you don’t want him to stop. “In your kitchen.”

He remembers everything. “Right before we went to Olive Garden for the first time.”

He sighs, pretending to be exasperated. “Of course that’s the part you committed to memory.”

“I’ve held onto a few other details too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Like how small the back seat of your Audi Quattro is.”

“A limousine would be far more comfortable. I should invest in one.”

You laugh as he twirls you and you trip over your own feet; he pulls you upright before you can fall to the slick cobblestones. And you think: This is real. No matter what happens between him and anyone else, what we have is safe and extraordinary and real.

“I’m glad you’re here, Cupcake,” Aemond murmurs through your hair, holding you without seeking more. “You and Cadi.”

You want him again, or you’re so close to wanting him that the line is less of a boundary than a quagmire, indistinct edges and quicksand that can drag you down to drown in it. “I never knew that this was possible. Thank you, Aemond.”

“It can be like this all the time.”

Not all the time, you think, knowing that there will always be Jade Dragon, the Targaryens, the stock market, the world, the past and the future, Christabel. But some of it.

Is that enough?

~~~~~~~~~~

Willis agreed to you and Aemond taking Cadi out of the country on one condition: that you return her to him the second you arrive back in Napoleonville. It’s late Tuesday afternoon when the plane’s wheels hit the runway and squeal to a halt. Aemond has left his red Audi in the Park-and-Ride lot. You collect the car and soar west on Route 10 into the red-gold horizon, chasing the setting sun.

“Daddy!” Cadi bellows when she throws open the front door of the Assumption Parish Sheriff’s Office, waving his gift bag excitedly. Inside is a refrigerator magnet, several packages of McVitie’s Digestives in different flavors, and a miniature red-coated Queen’s Guard to keep on his desk, perpetually covered with disorganized papers and crumbs from innumerable desserts. From her poster on the wall, Heather Locklear simpers at you. At the center of the dartboard, poor Tommy Lee is impaled in four different places.

“Comment ca va, cherie?!” Willis opens his arms to hug Cadi when she barrels into him. He guffaws, his eyes are shiny; he has missed her. “Ya had a real good time, I reckon?”

“It was totally tubular. But I’m glad I’m home now. Can I get a horse? His name is Patches and I love him.”

“Huh? What the hell ya need a horse for?” He peeks around Cadi to look at you, a curious blue gaze beneath the thick dark bangs of his mullet. “What’s she talkin’ ‘bout, sugar?”

Beside you, Aemond groans irritably. Then you hear a voice from one of the holding cells, almost always empty: “Hey, cake lady.”

“Aegon?!” you and Aemond say at once, and sure enough, when you check the last holding cell there he is: unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt, blue shorts, rainbow flip flops, hair like he’s been in a hurricane, a new eyebrow piercing.

Aemond asks Willis: “What did he do?”

Willis picks up a clipboard from his cluttered desk and begins reading. “Possession with intent to distribute cocaine—”

“I told you, I wasn’t distributing anything! It was for me!”

“Aegon, shut up,” Aemond pleads.

“Possession with intent to distribute marijuana, possession of drug paraphernalia, possession of methamphetamine less than 28 grams, operatin’ a vehicle while intoxicated, possession of MDMA, possession of alcoholic beverages in a motor vehicle, operatin’ a vehicle with a suspended license, resistin’ an officer…” Willis flips the page. “Speedin’, reckless drivin’, disturbin’ the peace while in an intoxicated condition, possession with intent to distribute Xanax, theft—”

“What the hell did you steal?!” Aemond demands.

“Burritos. I forgot my wallet at home.” Now Aegon is indignant. “But I saidI’d get them back! They didn’t need to call anybody about it!”

“Aegon, Taco Bell does not offer payment plans!”

“I can release him to ya, I guess,” Willis tells Aemond in a slow drawl.

“I really appreciate that. I’m so sorry about him, I’m absolutely mortified, I’ll pay whatever fines you want—”

“Wait, no,” Aegon says, panicked. His hands are gripped around the iron bars. “I don’t want to leave.”

Aemond stares at him. “You’re asking to stay in jail…?”

“I can’t go home. Stephanie’s there.”

“Of course she’s there. You knew she was flying in for the wedding.”

“Please let me stay here until she goes back to Monaco.”

“Definitely not. How’s everything else?”

“There’s something wrong with one of the Lake Verret rigs. Viserys mentioned a…a…I don’t remember, a dirt dump or something.”

“A mud pump?!”

“Yeah! That’s it. That’s what he said. It exploded.”

“Fuck,” Aemond hisses, then remembers that Cadi’s still there. She gives him a sly grin. You messed up, she means. Aemond looks to you, apologetic, disappointed. “I’m going to have to drop you off and then head straight home. There are messes to be mopped up.”

“No,” Aegon moans as Willis unlocks the holding cell and then wrestles him out of it when Aegon resists. “No, I’m a felon! I’m a danger to the public!”

“Don’t,” Aemond snaps, and this time his brother listens.

You say goodbye to Cadi—she barely notices—but as you go to follow Aemond and Aegon out of the Sheriff’s Office, she has a question. “Aemond?”

He stops. “Yeah, Cadi?”

“Can I go to the wedding?”

“Weddin’?!” Willis exclaims. “Already?!”

“Not mine,” you say.

“You really want to go?” Aemond asks Cadi with some reticence. But he seems to be considering it.

“Well, yeah. Mom said she and Amir are going. You’ll be there. Lots of cake will be there. And I’ve never been to a wedding before. I want to see what it’s like.”

Aemond turns to you, then to Willis, searching for permission. “It’s alright with me,” Willis says. “As long as someone there is keepin’ an eye on her.”

“It’s your choice,” you tell Cadi. “If you’re interested, I have no objections. But you have to be nice to Christabel.”

“Christabel?!” Willis says.

“That’s Aemond’s fiancée.” And there is a collective uncomfortable silence: Willis nodding slowly as he squints at you, Cadi chewing on her thumbnail, Aemond looking down at his Adidas sneakers, Aegon staring vacuously at the Heather Locklear poster on the wall.

With Aegon squeezed into the back seat, Aemond drops you off at the home Cadi calls the Fall-Down House. The new house hasn’t closed yet, but probably will in the next week. The adolescent gator is sunbathing in the last of the daylight in one corner of the yard; you can hear the pink Panasonic boombox inside playing Another One Bites The Dust.

“Ho, you’re back!” Amir cries, jubilant. He hugs you energetically, staining you with the flour on his hands; he’s been watching the bakery while you’ve been gone and keeping every cent of the profits in recognition of his labor, as agreed upon. “How was London?”

You give him his souvenir: a purple t-shirt with Princess Diana’s face on it. “Rainy. Wonderful.”

“Did you have any kinky sex in the royal grandma’s bed?”

“No,” you say, laughing. “But it was…I don’t know how to describe it. Calm. Normal. Easy. Like we could live that way forever.”

“So you’ve decided to be his Camilla.”

“Some moments I have. Other times I haven’t. But more and more, I just…” You try to decide what you mean. “The thought of giving him up feels impossible. And Christabel…they’re so distant with each other, so disconnected, so platonic. Their relationship doesn’t feel real. Maybe I can ignore it. Maybe this is the best I can hope for.”

Amir pushes his tortoiseshell glasses up the bridge of his nose and raises an eyebrow. “It might feel more real in three days.”

The rehearsal dinner is on Friday; the wedding is only 24 hours later.

~~~~~~~~~~

“You really should consider writing a cookbook, dear,” Alicent says from where she sits across from you. The dining room table is covered with flickering pink candles, bouquets of wildflowers, drinks garnished with cotton candy and Pop Rocks. Balloons bump against the ceilings, their long ribbons streaming down like the tentacles of a jellyfish. The stereo is thumping out Caught Up In You by 38 Special. Everything is pink and red: the colors of love. Yet just like at the engagement party, no one is talking about the couple getting married tomorrow. You could almost forget that there’s going to be a wedding. That makes it easier; and if denial is the terrain you live on now, so be it. That is far less agonizing than the alternative.

“Oh, no,” you demur, taking a sip of a cotton candy cocktail. You exchange a glance with Aemond, sitting several seats down from his mother. He is in a suit—black and white, fitted, faultless—and smiling, proud of you. “A book?! I couldn’t. Not in a million years.” I never even finished high school English.

“But all of my friends from home are captivated by your recipes, darling, and it would be so much easier if I could simply send them a copy of a cookbook rather than trying to describe every dish to them! Please consider it. Do you promise?”

“That I’ll think about it? Not too taxing a commitment. I suppose so.”

“Good,” Alicent chirps, then turns to whisper something to Criston, who drapes an arm briefly across her shoulders and gives her a reassuring little embrace. Amir is chatting with Aemond about San Franscisco. Christabel is talking to Helaena, who has been forced into a voluminous, magenta taffeta dress that she clearly despises; her chameleon Dreamfyre lurches around the table, occasionally stealing tastes of people’s food. Daeron, with Tessarion perched on the back of his chair, is trying to discuss something called seismic testing results with Viserys but getting ignored. Viserys is deep in conversation with Christabel��s father, the marquess, a large loud man whose booming voice drowns out everyone else. The two of them seem delighted, celebratory, very much in their own world. Their schemes have come at last to fruition. Christabel has several younger sisters in attendance—her bridesmaids—but no mother. You gather from pieces of dialogue you’ve overheard that her mother died when she was a child, a terrible and irreparable loss. Otto is so bored he’s flipping through a picture book about Kiribati. Aegon’s wife, Princess Stephanie of Monaco, is a headstrong, charismatic, and rather critical woman with short dark hair. She notifies Aegon each and every time he fails her, which happens frequently: You’re using the wrong fork. You missed a button on your shirt. You haven’t fucked me properly in over two years. You didn’t send flowers to my grandma’s funeral. This is evidently Aegon’s worst nightmare; he has disappeared upstairs in an effort to escape her.

Dinner is finished, and dessert has been brought by the servants. It turned out more like a crepe cake than a Napoleon cake—the layers of puff pastry didn’t want to fluff up as much as they should have—but no one seems to notice. This time, you and Amir knew the dress code expectations. You are both wearing black to fade into the backdrop like shadows, like distant memories. You are invited guests, but you are also locals, inferiors, recipients of charity.

“Where’s Aegon?” Helaena says. “He has to try this cake, it’s delicious! The cherry jam cuts the heaviness of the cream and pastry dough and makes it a perfect dessert for summer! And the color is delightful! It looks just like blood!”

“Where the hell is he?” Viserys demands, looking around, twisting in his chair. “It’s his brother’s rehearsal dinner, for Christ’s sake. One night of this importance and he can’t handle it? I swear to God, if he’s snorting or smoking anything up there I’ll have him committed to an institution—”

“I’ll find him,” you offer as you stand from the table. You have to visit the bathroom anyway, too many glitzy pink cocktails; two birds, one stone. You depart from the table and Aemond’s gaze follows you, a low heat that is building towards incineration, a baiting promise of dark euphoria that you can no longer pretend you don’t want desperately, defenselessly. Christabel gives you a sweet little wave. She is dripping in gold—dress, heels, jewelry—and seems happier tonight, more self-assured. Perhaps with the wedding so close, her trepidation concerning Aemond’s commitment has evaporated. Surely it is too late to call off the ceremony now. Tonight they feast, tomorrow they recite their vows, and then…

But no, you don’t think about the honeymoon. You will not allow yourself to. It can’t exist to you, and that is how you’ll survive this. Christabel will be in one universe, you in another, two timelines that never cross like something out of Star Trek. And the way she and Aemond interact is so impersonal, so untactile, that it is not so difficult to treat anything beyond chaste pecks on cheeks as an impossibility.

At the top of the staircase, Vhagar is lurking. She wags her long twiglike tail when she sees you and licks the knuckles of your left hand. You give her a pat on the head—and then several more when she whines as you try to leave—then at last she lopes off down the hallway.

Aegon is exactly where you’d assumed he’d be. He’s in his bedroom hunched over his computer and hammering furiously at the keyboard. There’s white powder on his fingers and in his thin mustache. On the screen, bizarrely, is what appears to be neon green grass and an ox-drawn wagon like the ones from the pioneer days. Sunfyre the ferret is stretched out across the bed napping, his angular face resting on his paws.

Aegon whirls around to face you. He is wearing a lime green satin suit but has forgotten to put on a shirt under it. “What? What? What do you want? I’m playing Oregon Trail. I have dysentery.”

“You have what…? Never mind, it’s not important. You need to come downstairs and eat some dessert. People are wondering where you are.”

“I’m busy.”

“If you don’t make an appearance on your own, Viserys will come looking for you. Also there are some Cap’n Crunch treats I left on the kitchen counter that you might be interested in.”

“Consider me tempted. I’ll be down momentarily.”

“You better be,” you tell Aegon, then retrace your steps back to the kitchen. Amir and Christabel are both there getting cans of Pepsi from the fridge and making very cumbersome small talk…or perhaps only Amir thinks it is that much of a burden. Christabel is chattering blithely away about different types of wildflowers. He gives you a look like Oh thank God, an excuse to escape and wastes no time heading back to the dining room.

“Did you notice what’s playing now?” he asks you just before he vanishes, then points towards the stereo in the grand foyer. You listen; it’s Money For Nothing by Dire Straits. “You think they know this song is about class warfare?”

“You should tell them,” you joke.

“Yeah, if I want to end up on Unsolved Mysteries.” Then Amir is gone.

“How are you doing?” you ask Christabel to be polite. You open the refrigerator and start hunting for your own can of Pepsi. “Excited? Nervous? You seem a little more relaxed than the last time I saw you. Are the wedding jitters finally dissipating?”

“They are,” she says, and when you glance back at her she is wearing a bashful sort of smile. It’s not an expression you can read. You resume digging through the refrigerator for a can of Pepsi; Amir and Christabel might have taken the last ones.

“That’s good,” you say noncommittally, hoping she’ll leave. But Christabel doesn’t leave. She seems to have something she needs to say. Just as you spy a lone can of Pepsi at the very back of the refrigerator and lean in to grab it, she proceeds to unburden herself.

“Well, you know, I was so concerned about me and Aemond before. I had no conviction that he especially liked me, and we never had anything to talk about, and he was so dreadfully undemonstrative…I was just beside myself, truly. I didn’t know what to do. But I feel much better about everything now. Norway was so good for us.”

Norway?

You close the refrigerator, your ice-cold Pepsi can clutched in your hand. You’re going cold all over. Slowly, you turn towards Christabel, glittering in her gold dress.

Norway???

“He took you on the North Sea trip.” You hear the words, but it doesn’t feel like you’ve said them. They sound flat and dazed.

“It’s a bit of a secret,” Christabel says; and again, her smile has no cruelty or sharp awareness in it, but her cheeks are pink. She’s blushing. What does she have to be embarrassed about? “My father doesn’t know. He wouldn’t approve. But I just felt…I felt ready, you know? I’m sure you understand what I mean. You aren’t so clinical and aloof about everything. I had to know if Aemond and I really had something between us before we got married.”

“You felt…ready?” Ready for what? Ready for WHAT, Christabel?

“I asked Aemond to take me with him. I begged, actually.” She giggles. “I won’t try to be proud about it! And finally he said yes. We stayed at a lovely hotel in Bergen, and during the day he would have to fly by helicopter out to the rigs, but at night…”

You’re staring blankly at her. You can’t believe what you think she’s going to say. Surely it must be something else, anything else—

“It wasn’t my plan to ever be intimate with a man before marriage, but sometimes…things change. Minds change, circumstances change. And I knew I wanted it. And it went so well! Now what do I have to be nervous about? All the uncertainties are resolved. Now we just sign the paperwork and start our lives together.”

He took her to Norway.

He slept with her in Norway.

“I hope it was just as good for him,” Christabel muses, a compulsive sort of oversharing. But she has had a few cocktails and she thinks you’re nonjudgemental and there’s probably not a single other soul she feels she can be truthful with…so why not the girl who got knocked up at prom and had a baby at seventeen? Surely she’s in no position to judge. “It’ll be even better once we can…you know. When we’re officially trying for a baby and there’s no need to worry about any precautions. I want Aemond to enjoy himself as much as possible. I want to be a good wife to him.”

You feel dizzy; you feel violently ill. And now you see everything: Aemond kissing her with his mouth open and ravenous, his hands between her legs, his hips pressed to hers, peeling off her clothes and learning how to make her moan, make her wet, make her come, and you think of how careful he must have been with her, a girl with no past, no ex-husband, no childbirth that nearly killed her, no stretchmarks and no baggage, just a smooth pristine rivulet of flesh that was so pure and uncontaminated it was weightless, and you can hear—though you don’t want to, though it feels like it will kill you—how tender he was, how encouraging, not a dominant who drinks down fantasies like a vampire sustained by blood but just a man, and a man who has at last found a woman he doesn’t need to grab, bite, bruise, handcuff to a bedpost to feel satisfied with.

He took her to Norway and he never told me.

You are saying something, and Christabel is nodding appreciatively, accepting the sage wisdom of a tarnished life. Your words don’t matter. They are folktales and charms, the croaks of bullfrogs, the whispers of the wind through Spanish moss, the Morse code of ripples in the water of the bayou. You are a novelty and your counsel is a souvenir; one day when she is living in California or Argentina or Australia or Alaska or her ancestral castle back in the U.K., Christabel will tell Aemond’s children: Once I met a nice single mom from Napoleonville Louisiana, and she told me to follow my heart and not let anyone shame me for wanting to be close with my soon-to-be husband.

Vhagar trots into the kitchen and begins nudging her massive head against Christabel’s bare knees. “Hi, big girl!” Christabel coos as she pets the blue merle Great Dane, clearly accustomed to this. “Who’s a giant gorgeous girl? You are!”

What did I expect? I knew they were getting married. I knew they were going to sleep together.

Yes, you knew it, but you hadn’t felt it, and now you have.

I can’t do this, you realize. I thought I could but I can’t.

“Christabel?” Alicent is calling like a windchime. “Darling, there are just a few more things we have to discuss before tomorrow, will you come back to the table please?”

“On my way!” Christabel replies obediently, and she gives you a quick, impulsive hug before vanishing.

I’m going to be sick. I’m going to have a heart attack. I’m going to drop dead right in the middle of this fucking kitchen.

Leaving your can of Pepsi forgotten on the countertop, you escape to the living room and then out the French doors into the garden. You run past the pool all the way to the pond full of multicolored fish you once hadn’t known were koi. You drop to your knees, then lie down on the cold cobblestones, and when it hits you again—Aemond touching her, Aemond loving her—you rupture into sobs that are breathless and shuddering. You try to stifle the noise with your palms; you clasp them over your mouth and smother your wails. It feels like you’re being ripped apart; it feels like you’re in labor, but there is no end, no consolation of a new life, no point at which your body chooses whether you live or die. It is only a razored wheel that turns in you again and again and again, shredding muscle and splitting bones.

There is a hand on your shoulder; someone is patting it awkwardly. You look up to see Aegon standing there. “Sorry,” he says. “You look…not good.”

“I’m really not good. I’m fucking terrible.” Your face is soaked and stinging with tears, your voice is strangled.

“Do you want some coke?”

“No, Aegon.”

“Do you want a ride home?”

“From you? Yeah, for sure, getting impaled by a stop sign would be a great next move for me.”

“I’m totally fine to drive.”

“Can you just pull Amir aside without anyone else noticing and tell him to say his goodbyes and then meet me in the driveway, please? He drove me here. I need him to take me home.”

“Okay,” Aegon says, and then: “Thanks for the Cap’n Crunch Treats. Thanks for remembering something I like and caring enough to bring more. No one really does that around here.” And he’s gone before you can think of a reply.

To get to the driveway without going though the house, you climb over a 5-foot wrought iron fence swarmed with rosebushes and ivy, no easy feat in a black Kmart dress and matching ballet flats. You acquire a dozen shallow gashes on your hands and forearms, but make it to the Ford Escort just in time for Amir to meet you under the full, cloudless moon, tossing his car keys from one hand to the other.

“What did—?” Then he sees your face. He gasps, knowing how bad it is. He’s never seen you like this. He didn’t know it was possible for you to look like this. He unlocks the Ford Escort and joins you inside, turning the key in the ignition. “What the fuck did Aemond do to you?!”

“I have to go home. It’s over, it’s over, I can’t do this.”

Amir is spinning out of the driveway. “Did he hurt you, did he—?!”

“He fucked Christabel in Norway,” you say, sobbing uncontrollably. “And I know I have no right to be jealous, I know we don’t have a conventional relationship, I thought I could handle this but I can’t. I can’t stop picturing him with her, and hearing it, and I…I…I don’t understand why this hurts so goddamn bad.”

“Babe,” Amir says gently, a palm on your trembling thigh. “You’re in love with him. That’s why.”

“This is killing me,” you whisper. You’re shaking all over. You feel like you’re battling for every breath.

Your best friend—your only friend—is quiet for a long time. “Don’t go tomorrow,” Amir finally says. “You don’t need to see the wedding. You shouldn’t put yourself through that. I’ll go, I can handle the cake alone, especially if Cadi’s with me to help with carrying plates and stuff.”

You don’t say anything. You stare out the nightscape window and mop tears from your face with McDonald’s napkins you find in Amir’s glovebox.

“Did you hear me? I don’t think you should go to the wedding tomorrow.”

“I won’t,” you agree hoarsely. “I can’t watch them have my wedding.”

“Willis is dropping Cadi off in the morning, right? I’ll pick her and the cake up from your house and bring her back when it’s over. You can tell her whatever you want…you have another cake order to work on, you’re sick, you’re injured, your mom needs a ride to the doctor, whatever.”

“Okay,” you whimper.

“Hey, look at me.”

You do, sniffling, shivering, in agony.

“You don’t deserve this. You deserve better than this.”

I don’t think I do. I think if I did, it would have happened by now. But you know Amir will not accept this answer. “Okay,” you say again, trying to make yourself believe it.

In the gravel driveway of your sinking house, Amir asks if you want him to say. You tell him no, you want to be alone, you have to think, you have to plan. Really, you just don’t want anyone to see you this shattered. It’s humiliating, it’s like you’re an animal, like something less than human needing to licks its wounds in a dark place. You walk into the Fall-Down House and flip on the kitchen light, artificial yellow luminance. You don’t start the air conditioner. You don’t touch the Panasonic boombox. You stand there mindlessly in the sounds of the bayou: cicada screams, owl hoots, the far-away hissing of gators. The wedding cake is in the refrigerator, banana bread, cream cheese frosting, a kaleidoscope of wildflowers painted by Amir’s expert hand. He’s leaving. Aemond’s leaving. Everyone is leaving.

There are tires crunching on gravel in the driveway, there are footsteps on the sloping porch. He is able to yank the door open because you never lock it. He blows in like a storm that kills.

“What the hell happened?!” Aemond shouts. “Why did you leave?! You didn’t even have the decency to say goodbye to me—”

“You took her to Norway.”

Aemond’s face goes from furious to lost. “Why would she tell you that?”

Not That’s not true, not Let me explain, not It didn’t mean anything. Your stomach sinks, a basket full of stones. “Because she thinks I’m her friend.”

“It wasn’t…” Aemond sighs. “It was a last-minute thing, and it was her idea. She really, really wanted to go to Norway, and I figured…you know…what’s the difference between the wedding night and a few weeks before it? So yeah, it happened—”

“Oh God,” you whisper, starting to sob again.

“And then I came home to your house, to your doorstep, because I missed you the entire time. The entire time, every hour, every minute, and there are no exceptions, okay, are you listening to me? I took her to Norway because I had to. I took you and Cadi to Clarence House because I wanted to. What I do with her is a reflex, an obligation, I’m on autopilot, I’m thinking of you to get myself hard, I don’t know how else to express to you how completely different these situation are in every single goddamn way.”

“She said it was good,” you say huskily, tears snaking down your cheeks that are raw from trying to dab them dry.

“Of course it was good for her!” Aemond flings back. “I’ve had a lot of casual sex, I know how to make women come, it’s a math equation, it doesn’t mean we’re soulmates!”

“I know I have no claim to you, but I…” You gaze out the kitchen window, dark and still, nothing to see but stars and lighting bugs. “I can’t do this.”

Aemond asks, kindly now: “What do you want?”

I want to not have to beg you to choose me. “I want this to be over.”

“No,” he says, panicking. “No you don’t.”

“I do.”

“You’re going to give this up as soon as it gets painful? I’m not worth fighting for, what I can do for you and Cadi isn’t worth a little pain? Because I’m no stranger to it either. You think I’m not hurting, you think nothing ever keeps me awake at night?”

“You could leave your prison any time you want to. But instead you built a brand new one around me.”

“You don’t understand what the kind of responsibility I’m beholden to feels like.”

“Yeah, a town named after Napoleon is the right place for you,” you seethe, enraged. “You’ve felt so fucking small your whole life that now you’re starving for what it tastes like to be in control. But I can’t let you destroy me. I can’t let my daughter grow up watching me settle for less than I need from a man. She’ll learn to live the same way.”

“I can’t believe you’re doing this.”

“Aemond,” you say, and you wait until he looks at you. “Do you really want children?”

When he answers, his voice frayed and his right eye misty. “I love Cadi.”

“That’s not what I asked. Do you want children of your own with Christabel?”

“I have to,” he says, miserable.

“No,” you plead. “You cannot have a baby with that girl. You can’t, Aemond. You are going to ruin so many lives, not just your own.”

“I have to,” he says again.

“Then get out. Viserys owns you, and Viserys wouldn’t want you here. He would want you back at the mansion impregnating your child bride.”

“She’s a legal adult, she’s 19, and she wants me, she begs for me, I’m not twisting her arm—”

“Then go!” you roar, striking him hard, both palms to his chest. Aemond doesn’t budge. “Get out, go home, go have kids you won’t give a fuck about just like Viserys never cared about you. Go repeat the cycle all over again. I’m done. I can’t be a part of it.”

“I won’t be like him,” Aemond swears.

“You will be. You already are.” You shove him again, but still, Aemond doesn’t move. You know what he’s waiting for, you know the right word to say. But you can’t get it to launch from your lips; it catches in your throat like a blade through the windpipe. “Get out!”

Your fingers hook into the lapels of his black suit jacket and stay there; you can’t let go. You’re both breathing heavily; you can hear it, you can feel the heat in the air. You keep his jacket gripped in your hands, he can move no closer, no farther away. When he leans into you, you breathe in his smoke and cologne; when his hands cradle your face, you feel the benevolent power that once gave you peace.

I want him. I need him. Not forever, no, I understand that’s not possible. But just for right now.

You look up at him and Aemond kisses you, his lips and tongue claiming you like untouched land; he puts down roots, he slits the jugulars of trespassers.

Here. Now.

You drag him down with you. When you drop to the floor, you strike the back of your skull against the scuffed, sloping wood and bite back a yelp.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Aemond says, though it isn’t his fault; he reaches for your head and cushions it with his right hand. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay.” You’re tearing open his white shirt; tiny translucent buttons go flying in every direction. Your palms glide over his chest, up to his throat, to his jaw, to knot in his hair. He reaches beneath your dress to slide off your panties, then buries his fingers between your legs. You moan helplessly, needfully, spreading your thighs wider for him. No man has ever been able to do this to you before: to make you forget everything, to make you feel—if only for a moment—beloved, worthy, chosen. He’s kissing you like he knows this is the last time. You’re touching the left side of his face and he doesn’t even notice, he won’t realize until later that there was a time when he was cured.

Aemond pulls his wallet out of the pocket of his suit pants, flips it open, and roots through it until he finds a condom. He starts to rip it open, moving with desperate speed, dire impatience.

“No, don’t,” you say. “Please don’t. I want all of you.” And I won’t get another chance.

He exhales in deep, ecstatic relief; he wants it too. You’re soaked, you’re ready, you’re aching for him like mending bones. He eases himself into you, gasping, and you are stunned by how good it feels already, how close you are, every rope of nerves and muscle glimmering with an opening heat that builds higher and higher, the reverse of a tornado finally touching down on earth. His hands are linked with yours and pinned to the floor above your head; he’s kissing you, he’s moaning into you, he thrusts deeper and harder when you beg him to do it.

Aemond untangles one hand from yours and reaches low to stroke you. Your fingers find his again and catch him, capture him, bring his hand back to the floor where it can be entwined with yours and his weight can hold it to the scraped wood. “I don’t need it, I’m close. Stay here. Stay with me.”

“I’m here,” he whispers, panting; and the friction of his body against yours overtakes you, and when you come it is blinding, bone-breaking, a whirlpool that traps you for what feels like over a minute, soaring highs punctuated by the illusion of fading over and over again until you think you can’t stand it, and only then does it end, Aemond collapsing on the floor beside you covered in your sweat and your wetness, you feeling the remnants of him bleeding down your bare thighs.

You drag yourself upright—muscles sore in your belly and back and thighs—and roll onto your knees so you can stagger to your feet. You tug on your panties so he doesn’t drip out of you onto the floor. Then you straighten the skirt of your black dress, turn on the little pink Panasonic boombox—it’s a U2 song, Where The Streets Have No Name—and begin washing a muffin tin that was left in the sink.

Aemond stands up and runs a hand through his hair, getting his bearings. He looks down at his pants and fixes his zipper and belt. He tries to close his shirt and then remembers you tore off the buttons. They lie scattered across the floor, useless.

As you scrub the muffin tin, you hear Aemond’s footsteps behind you. His palms begin at the small of your back and then skate around your waist to encircle you.

“Stop,” you tell him; and immediately his hands fall away. Aemond waits for you to say more, but you don’t. You don’t even look at him.

He walks to where the kitchen becomes the living room—you can tell by the creaks in the floor—and again, he waits. After a while he says: “I’ll call you when the new house is ready.”

“No. Have Criston handle it. I don’t ever want to talk to you again.”

“You get that I’m in love with you, right?” Aemond forces out, and when at last you turn to him there is the metallic glistening of tears on his right cheek. “I never feel this way about anyone. I don’t know how to handle it, I didn’t even know it was possible. But it’s true.”

“It’s not enough,” you say simply, and resume scrubbing the muffin tin.

He waits in silence, thirty seconds, a minute, two minutes. Then the door opens and shuts—like the jaws of a beast—and he’s gone.

#aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen #aemond x you #aemond one eye #aemond x reader #aemond #aemond fanfiction #hotd aemond

231 notes · View notes

2gayy2functionnn · 3 months

Text

Pool Party-

A little story based on my alignment chart for pool parties. FT everyone making fun of jsnis the whole time basically.

here it is for reference!!! ^^^

She really didn’t want to do this. Janis thought to herself as she stood outside the large george mansion.

“Janis let’s go!” Damian shouts behind the girl as he begins pushing her forward.

“Can’t we just go back and finish our movie” She groans digging her heels into the ground.

“And be antisocial for senior year. No thank you”

Janis crosses her arms and continues to dig in her heels stopping herself from moving any further.

“Janis, if you don’t stop acting like a child. I’ll treat you like one. Than i’ll have to carry you inside and you’ll be really embarrassed”

“Damian I don’t wanna be here!” She argues stomping her foot before she can stop herself.

Damian raises an eyebrow at her before sighing and walking in front of her.

“I know she was a complete asshole to you. She really has put in an effort to change though. Listen if she’s rude to you one more time we can call it quits and go home and watch the movie and never hang out with them again. Yeah?”

“What about senior year” She mocks crossing her arms.

“I’ll have you and it’ll be ok”

Janis nearly melts at that and she leans in and hugs her bestfriend (which never happens).

“Hey losers you gonna come in or keep sexing on my driveway!” A loud voice yells interrupting the moment between the two.

Janis shoves damian away with a blush. Janis is not soft so she doesn’t hug. Her cover was nearly blown.

“Ready?” Damian asks janis who sighs dramatically.

“That’s a dumb question”

“Let’s gooo!” Regina yells opening the door further.

“Janis walk now or i’ll pick your little ass up” Damian threatens standing and up and stretching his back.

“You wouldn’t dare!” Janis shouts putting her hands on her hips.

Damian raises his eyebrow in his famous try me face and janis stomps to the door where the blonde stands.

“Janis, lovely to see you” Regina grins.

“Go back to hell” Janis scoffs before it turns to a squeak as she’s pulled back by her shirt from passing the blonde.

“She’s sorry” Damian says as he guides the girl by her shirt like a leash.

“No i’m not!” Janis yells before its muffled as Damian claps his hand over her mouth.

“Bite me you’re dead!” Regina heard Damian yell as they walk outside. Regina giggles softly and grabs the extra towels before following them outside.

Damian pulls off his shirt and poses in his rainbow striped swim shorts before jumping in. Gretchen lays on the side in a lean chair chatting with cady while karen splashes on the steps of the shallow section. Aaron floats on his back in the middle of the water.

Janis throws her towel down on the chair. Walking over to the side of the pool and dipping her foot in.

She tosses a football at damian’s head who’s floating on the water after it hits him and he shouts angrily she gets lectured by three different people about pool safety.

After her friends act too much like adults for her liking she walks to the side of the pool and starts sorting through the toys on the side. She grabs a large water gun and looks at Cady, Regina and Gretchen on the side in the lawn chairs. She smirks grabs an extra gun and hands it to karen telling her the plan.

5 minutes later with matching shit eating grins on their faces Janis and Karen walk over to the girls hiding behind their lawn chairs as they talk about nails.

Janis spins and shoots the water at the girls who all squeal and cover their faces. Karen does the same giggling and jumping up and down as she shoot’s gretchen with water. Bored with the amount of water coming out She undos the holder and tips it over spilling the water all over regina.

She grins at the drenched blonde whose hands move into fists.

“Janis Elizabeth Imi’ike” Regina says in a weirdly calm but angry tone standing up and looking down at the girl she towers over.

“Hey” Janis smirks innocently. The rest of them watch on in both fear and amusement. Karen sits next to gretchen who dragged her down and ruffled her hair in retaliation.

Janis and Regina continue in a staring match. Before Janis raises the gun up one more time and lets the last squirt of water hit the blonde right in her face.

Regina’s eyes narrow further as she screams angrily and reaches forward grabbing the small brunette. She grabs her by the back of her shirt and drags her to the side of the pool.

“you think that was funny” Regina asks spinning the girl to face her.

“Hilarious” Janis smirks. Regina smirks back at her mockingly.

“I hope you find this funny too” Regina says before leaning down and lifting her up. A hand around her waist and one around her leg.

“No don’t! This is my favorite shirt!” Janis yells twisting in the hold.

“Should’ve thought about that before drenching me in water!” Regina shouts adjusting her hold on the girl. She looks down at the girl in her arms and smirks.

“Have a nice swim” She says before leaning back and tossing the flailing girl into the deep end. Janis hits the water on her back immediately yelping at the contact.

She swims up wiping her hair from her face and climbs out of the pool an annoyed look on her face. She takes her drenched shirt and shorts off setting them on the lawn chair and wringing them out.

She grumbles to herself as she does so before taking a deep breath and climbing back in the water ignoring regina who continues to smirk at her.

She swims over to damian who makes fun of her for a few minutes before they chill and talk about school until they are interrupted by a large yell.

“let’s play chicken!” cady shouted a bright smile covering her face. Karen cheered along at the idea.

“I can ref” Gretchen offered softly coming and sitting on the edge apprehensively. Regina sat next to her and offered to ref too.

“No way Regina! we need an even number!” Janis shouts splashing at the blonde. Still angry at the tall girl.

“It’s too cold” Regina grumbles crossing her arms “plus chlorine is like really bad for my hair.”

Janis mocks her before swimming over only to be stopped by damian grabbing her, an arm hooked around her waist and stopping her from moving.

“What are you doing?” she shouts exasperated. Flailing her arms in the water slapping at the taller boys arms.

“Saving you from your own bad choices” damian shoots back turning to the blonde still holding his angry friend.

“Come on Regina, your hair will look fabulous no matter what, can you just come in?” Damian offers batting his eyes. Regina sighs but slowly lowers herself into the water, wincing at the cold.

“Great! So i’m with aaron obviously!” Cady says wrapping an arm around him. Janis continues to fight at damian’s arm still trapping her.

“Do i have to be with her?” damian sighs dramatically and motions to the small girl in his arm.

“Rude!” Janis yells as Regina snorts.

“No Damian you can pick whomever you’d like” Cady says helpfully.

“Whomever” Janis mocks fidgeting.

“Karen want to team?” Damian asks the tall girl who nods happily her eyes widened.

“Hey! That leaves me with the monster!” Janis supplies still fidgeting in his arm.

“You’ll be fine” he rolls his eyes and lets go of his hold causing her to sink and gulp a lot of water.

“Fuck you!” she shouts as she comes back up for air with a gasp, ignoring her friends laughs.

She swims softly over to regina still grumbling.

“Climb on” Regina sighs lowering herself into the water.

“What no way!” Janis scoffs shaking her head.

Regina tilts her head and look at the girl.

“What?”

“I’m not getting on your shoulders! You get on mine” Janis challenged lowering herself in the water.

“Janis seriously, you can’t even touch.”

“Yes I can!”

“Janis seriously, you were going to get on damian’s!” She shouts ignoring her.

“Well damian doesn’t hate me!” Janis shoots back crossing her arms.

“Jesus Janis, I don’t hate you. I never have. I’m so so sorry for the way I treated you, but i promise it wasn’t out of hate!”

“Than what was it out of?”

“That’s not important can you just get on, before we get disqualified or some shit?”

Janis grumbles and looks up at her again. She mumbles something.

“What was that?” the blonde asks moving closer.

“I said i…” She says trailing off again.

“Seriously Janis, I can’t hear you!”

“I don’t like heights!” She shouts. Regina laughs holding a hand out on her side.

“I’m sorry, I just”

“Ok ok, wrap it up” janis grumbles embarrassed.

“Ok i’m sorry, it’s just kind of funny”

“no it’s not!”

“Ok, Im sorry. I promise i’ll hold on to you though and if you fall you’ll hit water so it’ll be ok. Yeah?”

“Yeah” Janis agrees softly and swims around behind the blonde and presses her hands on her shoulder.

“Go down” She whispers softly. Regina gulps but begins to slowly lower herself. She resists the urge to gasp as she feels tiny nails rake across her neck and pull her wet hair from behind the neck and lightly toss it over the one shoulder.

“Ready?” Janis asks.

“Ready” Regina replies with a gulp as she sinks and the short girl hoists her self onto her shoulders and immediately grabs the blondes head.

“Oh fuckkkk, this is high” Janis squeaks wrapping her arm around the blondes head.

“Janis Stop” regina grunts shaking her head. The brunette grabs her head tighter.

“Come on we don’t got all day!” Damian shouts as karen sits on his shoulders and picks at his earring. Cady and aaron are in their own world trying to recreate the spiderman kiss, with cady atop his shoulders.

Regina grins as they move in closer and janis’s grip tightens and her legs lock under her arm pits in an attempt to stay still.

“Jay, I promise, I got you. I won’t let you go” Regina whisper. Although she can’t see the girls reaction she feels the hold loosen a bit.

“Ready teams?” Gretchen asks.

“Ready” Damian smirks at Janis. Mocking threatening glances at her.

“Wait!” Janis shouts causing everyone to halt and look at her.

“Janis?” Gretchen asks looking at the girl.

“I- Nevermind” she says glaring back at damian who smirks at her.

“Ready set go!” Gretchen yells as the teams move to each other. Janis shoves at a slippery carts shoulder and watches as she immediately falls off.

“Aaron and Cady are out!” Gretchen yells in an announcer voice. Damian moves closer to them. Janis stays firm on her shoulders as she and karen shove at each other. Both are pretty evenly matched and staying strong on their partners shoulders.

“Come on Janis!” Regina yells up to her partner. The brunette continues to shove at the tall girl when she feels a grip on her ankle. She looks down eyes wide.

Damian smirks as he grabs her ankle and drags her foot towards her. He begins to scratch at the ball of her foot. Janis squeals and squirms sideways on regina’s shoulders trying desperately to move away from him.

“No! Cheating!” Janis squeals moving on the shoulders. Regina raises an eyebrow at the girls laughing but keeps her hands on the girls thighs not letting her go.

Karen takes the chance and shoves at her. Janis goes to fall back ready to give up but regina grips her further refusing to let get down.

“Janis Imi’ike! I’m not losing this game because you’re ticklish!” Regina snarls holding the girls thighs still as she continues to squirm almost screeching at this point. Regina was way to competitive some times and it seemed she was really desperate to win this one.

“Please!” Janis screeches yanking at regina’s hands on her thighs. Damian continues to tickle her foot laughing maniacally.

“Janis you fall, i’ll get you worse than Damian would.” Regina warns the girls who’s red in the face.

With a final tug janis removed regina’s hands and falls backwards escaping the tickling fingers.

Regina groans as she hits the water.

“The winners! Damian and Karen!” Gretchen cheers.

“They cheated!” Regina yells splashing the girl on the side. Janis stands up fixing her hair in the water crossing her arms a large blush on her face.

“I have never lost a game of chicken in my life you little shit.” Regina says spinning to the girl and sticking a finger in her face.

“Chill Gina, it’s just a game” Janis rolls her eyes glaring at Damian.

“Watch your back shrimp” Regina says climbing out of the pool and sitting next to gretchen continuing her complaining of the cheating.

“I hate you!” Janis shouts splashing water at her large friend who swims over smirking. Damian places a hand on his chest.

“I’m crushed” He pouts standing next to her.

“You promised you wouldn’t tell anyone!” Janis groans.

“Well technically, I didn’t tell anyone” Damian smirks batting his eyes “plus you telling me you didn’t like the squirming on top of regina” He teases.

“I’ll kill you!” Janis shouts throwing herself at the boy.

“Careful Jan Jan! Now everyone knows your secret.” He cackles holding her at arm length away.

“Oi! Children! Snacks are here” Regina yells from the side of the pool. Damian smirks and pulls Janis closer.

“I bet Regina liked it” Damian whispers in her ear patting her on the head. Janis blushes and follows him out of the pool and sits next to the rest of the group on the small outside couch.

Chatter rings around while janis sits on the end crossing her arms a pout still on her face. Regina sits on the other side the same expression.

“Guys it’s just a game” Cady tries to mediate when both of them shout “shut up!” in sync.

They turn and look at each other eyes narrowing.

Cady takes a deep breath. This is going to be a long night.

#mean girls 2024 #janis imi'ike #regina george #rejanis #aaron samuels #cady heron #damien hubbard #karen smith #gretchen wieners

69 notes · View notes

idontplaytrack · 4 months

Text

No, idiot

Janis ‘Imi’ike x Regina George

Warnings: coarse language, fluff

Just a cute little peek into their day, home alone while Janis’ parents are on a trip. Ft. ‘Imi’ike! younger sister reader(1 year younger) & Cady Heron

Inspired by this incorrect quote by @frogs00 & @magicmumu2 <3 :)

“Jan.” She hears Regina calling her name. But she ignores her, more focused on her phone— she was currently texting you.

“Janis.” She hears again. Ignored.

“‘Imi’ike.” Regina huffs, tossing a cheese puff at her face.

Janis shrieked. “What?”

“I’ve been calling for you forever.” Regina smirks, “What the hell are you doing?”

“Texting y/n.”

“Why? She’s fine. She’s at the grocery store.”

“I know she’s fine. I just want her to get my damn gummy worms.” Janis sulked.

Regina nearly snorted.

“What’s so funny?” Janis pulled a face, tossing her phone aside after reading your text.

“Nothing, you’re just cute. Can’t I think you’re cute?” Regina shrugs, “Idiot.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Janis scoffs, grabbing a couch cushion and tossing it Regina’s way. The blonde easily caught it and set it down. “Don’t make me hit you back with this.”

“Thought you already would’ve.” Janis flashes her a cheekily smile then picked up her phone when it buzzed. “NOOOO.”

“What?” Regina cracked a smile.

“They don’t have the gummy worms I wanted.” Janis sulked.

“So, just get something else?” Regina scooted closer, wrapping an arm around the smaller girl. “I’ll get you those you like next time we’re out.”

“Dude, I’ve been craving for that specific brand of gummy worms. I finally got her to cave and get me a bag and they’re out of stock.” Janis deadpanned.

“Babe, if you say ‘gummy worms’ one more time…I will laugh.”

“Ugh, forget it. It’s such a stupid thing anyway.”

Regina tilted Janis’ face and presses a kiss to her lips, “Cheer up. We’re home alone.”

Janis chuckled mockingly, “With my sister.”

“Like she would care what we do.” Regina replies.

“It’s stressful knowing she’s like two doors down.” Janis rolled her eyes.

“You could be quiet.”

“Tsk.” Janis looks up, glaring at the blonde, “Talk about yourself.”

Regina smirks again, then laughed breathily, “She’s not here now.”

“No.” Janis says, “We’re not doing anything now.”

“Okay.” Regina agrees without a fight.

“But when she goes out to watch a movie with Carly tonight, sure.”

Regina says, eager, “Ooh, okay.” Janis giggles a little. “Who’s Carly again?” Regina asks. “Is that the girl she has a crush on?

“The girl she likes, yeah.” Janis answered.

“Right.” Regina nods, tracing random shapes and lines on Janis’ forearm, “Did y/n tell her yet?”

“No, but the tension? It’s there alright.” Janis laughs at the recollection, “Every time I see them together, they’re like— flirting. To me at least.”

“Maybe they need a little nudge.” Regina winks.

“I am not meddling. They’re doing fine.”

“Yeah, whatever.” Regina said back, “So we know your sister’s queer because she came out to us. But is Carly?”

“I dunno. She never said anything more than ‘I think I like her’.”

Regina hums, “Oh. Hey, what’s for lunch?”

“Food, usually.” Janis answered without hesitation.

“No, idiot, I mean what are we having?” Regina was biting back a laugh.

“An unwanted conversation.” Janis smiled, earning a playful shove from the blonde.

“Why is your sister at the grocery store?”

“She said she wanted to cook something, I dunno. She’s old enough to drive, I don’t have to watch her like a toddler.” Janis shrugs.

Regina scoffs, “And you couldn’t have just said she was gonna cook?”

At this moment, they hear a familiar jingle of keys. You were home. “Hi, baby.” Regina greeted. “Hey.”

Janis squints, noticing a change in your mood. Not in a good way. “y/n, what’s wrong?”

“I ran into Carly at the donut shop I stopped at on my way home.” You began, “I was planning on telling her that I liked her tonight, but it doesn’t matter anymore.”

Janis and Regina shifted on the couch to make space for you in between them. You sat down. “She was there with a boy. And they kissed.” You started to explain, recalling the images in your head, “She was the one who started flirting with me first so I flirted back. I don’t even know when she got a boyfriend— she didn’t tell me. If she did, I wouldn’t have been so stupid and continued. I should’ve guessed it when she canceled on me last minute for the last few times. I’m so stupid.”

“No. No one could’ve just guessed something like that.” Janis disagrees, “And don’t you dare call yourself stupid. You are not stupid.”

“What can we do to make you feel better?” Regina asks seriously.

“I don’t know, honestly. I just feel like shit. I don’t even know what I want to do.” You admit.

“How about we get our friend Cady to come hang out, and you two can chat? See where that goes?” Regina suggested. Janis was alarmed, “Really? You think this is the right time for that?”

“Actually, yeah. Please do that.” You agreed, “I don’t want to think about Carly anymore. I honestly just need a clean break from her. Now that my feelings for her are no longer platonic. It’s not gonna help if I stay friends with her.

“I don’t get it.” Janis says.

Regina chuckles, “Right. You don’t know this, but word has it that Cady likes your sister.”

“Cady?”

“Yes. And she has a crush on Cady too.”

“I never thought she’d like feel the same way, too, in my defence. She’s way out of my league. She hangs out with you.” You said, looking at Regina.

“She didn’t hang out with me.” Regina pointed to Janis, “But she’s my girlfriend now. So your point?”

“Is that I’m nervous.” You looked at the blonde dead in the eye, “Okay, it’s silly to have two crushes at once but hey, if you’re gonna offer to text her for me so we can hang out, I’m not a complete idiot.”

“Is this not too rushed?” Janis raised her concern.

“No, I’m done with Carly. Nothing has to happen between me and Cady— we’re just hanging out, getting to know each other.” You replied firmly.

“Okay, if you say so.” Janis smirks, grabbing her phone.

“What are you laughing at?” You squinted at Regina.

“Just the fact that sooner or later, the whole of our friend group’s gonna be kissing each other.”

Janis chortled, “She’s right. Karen and Gretchen. Me and her. I mean, Damian’s…Damian. Then you and Cady, maybe?”

“Okay, I take it Janis is texting Cady. I will make us a nice lunch. You don’t worry about anything at all — just look pretty for your crush.” Regina decided. “Requests?”

“Just make whatever you want.” Janis shooed her away.

“Fine. Chicken and waffles?”

“Sounds good.” You told her as she walked into the kitchen and checked out your grocery haul.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine, Janis. Just need a good cry in the shower later on. All a part of life, right?” You chuckled dryly, “We’ve been friends forever. Maybe that’s why it felt so easy to be catching feelings for her. It’s not her fault, I just wish she would’ve told me she was seeing someone just like she’s told me everything else. Then it wouldn’t have been so sudden and such a punch in the gut. Also, the fact that she acted as if I already knew when she introduced me to him? I knew I had to leave her. She wasn’t honest with me. I don’t want someone like that in my life anymore.”

Janis puts her arm around your shoulder, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, “You’ll be alright, bubs. We got your back.”

“Thanks, Janis.” You blinked profusely, trying to avoid the crying.

“Let’s watch a movie, alright? You pick one. I’ll be back in a second. Just gonna grab us some snacks.”

“Do you guys want cookies or brownies?” Regina asks from across the room.

“Both.” Janis requested.

“No, idiot. Pick one.” Regina laughs, “I’m using the boxed mixes in the pantry. So if your parents ask, it was me.”

“The cookies, please.” You replied, “Thanks, Reg.”

“I was hoping you’d pick the brownies, but I’ll listen to you because you’re in a bad mood and I’m trying to help you feel better if not Janis’ll kill me.”

“I will not.” Janis gasps, offended.

“You’re capable of it.” Regina retorted, “You lit my backpack on fire.”

“Wrong.” You chimed in, “She lit your unicorn on fire. Your backpack was collateral damage.”

“I’m joking.” Regina tries not to grin but still did at this interaction. She��d never admit it, but she obviously had a soft spot for Janis, but also, for you. She cares, but always hid her concern behind her usual attitude whenever she speaks or does something.

————

The smell of waffles soon wafted through the air, accompanying the aroma of the fried chicken. “Stop staring at my ass.” Regina looks over her shoulder.

Janis stuck her tongue out, “No.”

“Childish.”

“I’ll bite you.”

You laughed, hugging a couch cushion close while your eyes were glued onto the TV screen. Before you knew it, Janis was hopping off the couch and jumping onto Regina’s back while the blonde was plating the food. “Hey!” Regina exclaimed. “Damn, I could’ve dropped this on the floor, baby.”

“As long as you don’t drop me on the floor.” Janis continues, resting her chin on Regina’s shoulder.

“Will you please get off me?” Regina asked, “Lunch is ready.”

“Fuck, you’re a great cook.” Janis admired the food on the table.

“Thank you~ I try.” Regina says, “Off.”

“Fine.” Janis pouted, standing back on the ground.

Regina retaliated by smacking her on the ass. “Ow! Damn you!” Janis shrieked, “You’re going to pay for that.”

“Gladly.”

Sighing, then laughing lightly as you watched them joke around with each other, you walk over to the kitchen, joining just briefly to grab your plate. You ate in front of the TV while your sister and her girlfriend ate in the dining area.

“y/n, the cookies are done if you want them.” Regina tells you. You nodded, not paying much attention to her than you were the movie. “You okay?” Janis asks.

“Mhm.” You confirmed, then Janis realised you were watching your favourite movie. Which explained why your eyes were practically glued to the screen. She shrugs, “Cady’s arriving soon.”

“Okay.”

Regina laughs, “Damn, what the kind of movie is she watching for her to be so focused on it?”

“Tangled.”

“What?” Regina chortled, “Tangled?”

“Well, she likes it. Let her enjoy it.” Janis retorted.

“I didn’t say anything about not letting her enjoy her movie.” Regina squinted, “You have syrup on your chin, idiot.”

“Whatever.” Janis shrugs, “I’m still eating, anyway.” Regina grabs a napkin and leaned forward to help Janis clean it off. Janis gives her a childlike grin, mouth full of the chewed up waffle and chicken, “I’m your idiot, though.”

“What is this? Are you like, about to get a sugar rush?” Regina was more amused by her little antic than she expected.

“Maybe.”

“Oh, boy.” Regina sighs, watching the brunette happily munching on the food. “You’re lucky you’re cute.”

Janis rolled her eyes playfully, “Aw, thank you so much.”

The doorbell rings, interrupting their silly banter. “Cady’s here.” Janis declared. “I’ll get the door. She’s um…doing that.” You put down your plate and went to answer the door.

“y/n! Hi!” The redhead gives you a bright smile, you stepped aside to let her enter.

“Hi.” You flashed her a small smile in return.

“I made chicken and waffles. Help yourself.” Regina began, “y/n’s watching Tangled, and Janis is currently giggling to herself because she’s had too much sugar.”

Cady couldn’t help but laugh, especially with how she said it, “Oh, I love Tangled. It’s my favourite movie.“ Your head whipped around so fast to look at her, “It is?”

“Oh, yeah. I haven’t watched many movies, but yes. That’s my favourite one.” She confirms, glancing at you on her way to the kitchen. After getting her share of food, Cady joins you in the living room to watch the movie together with you.

“She likes you, Caddy.” Janis giggles, “Oh, god. I need to stop doing this.”

“Janis!” Your eyes widened, horrified.

“She does this a lot, I’m sure she’s just—” Cady tells you.

“Yeah, she does.” You laughed awkwardly, “But um, Regina said you liked me…?”

Her cheeks flushed a light pink, “Um…” Your heart starts slamming in your chest, waiting for her to respond.

“Yeah, I— I do.” Cady spat out after putting her half-eaten plate of food down, “Do you…”

“Y—” You stuttered, “Yes, I do. I like you, too.”

Janis’ giggling snapped you out of it, “Regina, please don’t tell me you put stuff in her food.”

“Why would I do that? She’s a handful as it is.”Regina laughs, “Okay, that’s it, you’re not eating anymore of this. You are acting like a child.”

You were trying not to laugh, but seeing Janis being babied like this by Regina was far too entertaining to you and Cady.

“Fineee.” Janis huffs. “Take a shower with me.”

Regina’s brows were raised, bewildered. Then her signature smirk was plastered on her face again, “Okay.”

Janis stopped fidgeting, looking at Regina solemnly, “Really?”

“Fuck it, yeah. We’ll let these two babies have their alone time, while we have our fun.” Regina looked at you and Cady then back at Janis. “Will you two be okay alone? Of course, who am I kidding, you guys aren’t kids.”

“We’ll be fine, Regina. Just gonna hang out here.” Cady assured, “You two just…lock your door.”

“Don’t even worry about that.” Regina takes Janis by the wrist and pulled her up. Janis lays her head on Regina’s chest, “Carry me.”

“God, babe. The syrup on your chin is on my shirt.” Regina seethed, but she didn’t stay annoyed for long and just complied, “Fine, clingy. Cady, not a word. To anyone.”

————

🏷️ Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @reneeswif3 @ludoesartnstuffs @pda128

#mean girls 2024 #auli’i cravalho #renee rapp #janis ‘imi’ike #regina george #janis ‘imi’ike x regina george #sibling reader #female reader #reader insert #wlw #wlw fluff #queer #queer fiction #mgmm fics #inspired

54 notes · View notes

chaoticcomposition · 8 months

Text

saw oc kiss week floating around and wanted to participate, I love drawing kisses for february so it's nice to have the excuse!

ft. cady (she/they/he) on the left and @solfell's kishore (she/her) on the right. just two nbs sharing a kiss

edit: my pal wrote a piece to go along with it!

#ockiss24 #dungeons and dragons #dnd #d&d #half-orc #paladin #goliath #monk #dnd oc art #drawerings #ocs #cadiana jacqueline steelsong #elspeth regrew cady's pinky lmao

137 notes · View notes

reneerappisms · 3 months

Text

hey guys, happy day 7! today's entry from me is a silly minecraft chatfic (ft. fetchen, my beloveds) inspired by my misadventures with my friends (and also just whatever made us laugh while I was writing). I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

ship: regina x cady, gretchen x karen

words: 1.4k

rating: teen and up

summary:

regina makes a minecraft server for the gang. what could possibly go wrong?

25 notes · View notes

applbottmjeens · 8 months

Text

STYLE SWAP

inspired by the homie @sleepyconfusedpotato

ft. the couple that will NEVER beat those sugar daddy allegations

I've mentioned before that Anna has a very girly aesthetic off duty (went for y2k bimbocore for funsies on this one) that contrasts with her overall F E R A L personality and I'm glad I got to finally show off how different she and Phillip are. Guy is literally in the Caucasian dad drip while his girl is dressed like Cady Heron 2004

this was so fun to do, and you can see the HD and some other versions here for free on my Patreon. ♡

I wonder what I'm gonna draw these two doing next...

#oc x canon #bellegraves #cod oc: annabelle “gremlin” pham #annabelle pham #phillip graves #modern warfare oc #mw2 oc #mw3 oc #modern warfare 3 #cod oc #call of duty ocs #shadow company #style swap

44 notes · View notes

collabwithmyself · 10 months

Text

Cady moment (ft. @wizardmolars's Antigone!)

#collab doodles #collab ocs #cadell #wizardmolars

26 notes · View notes

aswallowssong · 23 days

Text

Sicktember #3: Campus Crud

The HOO AU College AU is back at it again folks, ft. everyone's favorite Boy Toys. @starstwinkleplanetsshine let's name this AU lol

This is so stupid.

“This is so stupid!”

“You’re going to make your throat worse, stop it,” Cadence scolded, giving one Leo Valdez a look that said, if you don’t cut it out, I might kill you.

“But–”

“No, no buts, Leo. Seriously, can’t you just rest? Look at Jason and Percy? Are either one of them making me want to rip my hair out?”

In Leo’s defense, Jason and Percy had gone down before he had, and were in a pile of limbs on the floor, both listlessly watching what Cadence thought was a rerun of RuPaul’s Drag Race. As she looked, she realized that at one point she’d given both boys a damp washcloth for the fevers they were running, but now Jason didn’t have one, and Percy had two.

“Percy–”

“I already know what you’re gonna say, Cades, and he gave it to me. I didn’t steal it.”

She frowned. “I wasn’t–”

“You were. Shh, Ru is talking.”

Cadence rolled her eyes, turning back to Leo. Leo was looking at her like he’d been betrayed.

“Okay, one of them is making me want to rip my hair out.”

“Mhm.”

“Please lay down and stop talking.”

Leo looked like he wanted to revolt, but he played nice, laying back down on the couch and snuggling under the ugly orange blanket he loved so much.

Cadence took a breath. Most of their friends had been down with what Ros, a friend of theirs that was a Sophomore, called “Campus Crud.” Leo’s half-brother, Evan, had already had it, and so had she, so they’d said that it was basically inevitable.

Cadence would have preferred to call it “The Most Annoying Thing To Happen This Semester.” And that was saying a lot, considering they’d seemed to miss it first semester. They weren’t as lucky now, in mid-January, when everyone was bringing germs back from home, or holiday, or wherever they might have been for New Year’s.

She wished Angie was there. It would have been nice to have another set of hands, but it hadn’t taken too long to figure out that as soon as someone was sick, she might as well have been in the wind. Cadence didn’t understand it at all, but then again, her dad was a doctor, her two older brothers were in medical school, and she’d already been accepted into the nursing program, as soon as her Gen Eds were out of the way. For her, illness was a natural part of life.

A natural part of life that was currently driving her insane.

“Hey, Cady?”

She had no idea when the Jackson twins, Jason, and Leo had started calling her that, but it was still weird to hear it from someone that wasn’t at least partly related to her.

“Yeah, Perce?”

“I’m cold.”

“No,” she said simply, “you’re not. Your body is too warm, so it feels more cold around you.”

There was a pause, and she peered over the couch to see him looking at her with an absolutely pathetic pout. “But I’m cold.”

She closed her eyes for a second, knowing that if they were open, there’d be nothing to stop her from rolling them.

He’s sick. Be kind.

“I know,” she said, almost surprised by how calm her voice was. How even. “But I don’t think it’s a good idea to give you another blanket if we want your body temperature to cool down.”

“What happened to ‘sweat it out?’ I feel like my dad used to say that.”

“People did used to say that,” Cadence said simply, losing the fight, and rolling her eyes. “But it’s a myth.”

“I like myths.”

“Me too,” Jason croaked. He’d been hit first, and was still very much in the deep end of the nasty cold making its rounds.

“I like myths,” Leo agreed, poking out from his bright orange cocoon. “Especially if they let me be warm.”

“No one is feeling warm,” Cadence said, taking a deep breath to even herself back out. “You can’t sweat out the cold virus that’s making you sick. That’s not how it works. The fever is an effect of your immune system working properly to fight the virus. You’re going to feel cold. You’ll start feeling better when your white blood cells win and your fever breaks.”

“What about the fact that all my muscles feel like they’re made of pain?” Percy said, Jason and Leo humming in agreement, and Cadence pinched at her nose bridge.

“Haven’t any of you been sick before? Actually, don’t answer that. I’ve literally done this with all three of you already this year. Why are we even having this conversation?”

“Well, when Jason was really sick, he was basically incoherent,” Leo pointed out. Jason tried to throw a water bottle at him, but it missed wide.

“Good one, Jay,” she said dryly, and Percy gave a congested chuckle.

“Well, Percy showed up at their doorstep and threw up on Cady’s shoes,” Jason said, and Percy reached out and slapped his arm, betrayal on his face.

“Hey!”

“Boys–”

“At least I didn’t give myself food poisoning!”

“Ay! The caf gave me food poisoning, sonso, don’t put that on me!”

“Boys!” Cadence yelled, and all three winced, Jason going as far as covering his ears a little. She knew all three of them had wicked headaches, and it was sort of a low blow to yell, but she didn’t need them riling each other up.

She lowered her voice again. “I was just trying to make a point that none of these things I’m saying should be surprising to you three. You’re going to be cold, and achy, and feel bad, because you’re sick. And I’m trying to make this as painless as possible, but I’m also trying to do what I think is best, based on everything I know. I’m also eighteen, and I’m very tired, so just…” she gestured to the screen of Leo’s computer, where they’d been streaming old shows, mostly legally. “Watch RuPaul.”

The boys were all staring at her with varying levels of embarrassment, directly based on how sick they were really feeling. Jason was mostly listless, while Leo looked truly embarrassed, and Percy at least had the gumption to look sheepish.

“Sorry Cady,” they chorused, and she rubbed her temples, exasperated, but she couldn’t stay mad for long. She loved the boys, even when they made her want to freak out.

She sighed. “I forgive you guys.”

The three of them turned back to the screen, and just as RuPaul announced which queens would have to Lip-Sync for their Lives, her phone rang. The boys booed her, and she rolled her eyes, again, stepping into the hallway.

She let it vibrate another time, taking in the quiet of Leo and Percy’s dorm outside of their room. No boys whining. Noone coughing or sniffling. No RuPaul’s voice through Leo’s shitty speakers. Not, of course, that she had anything against RuPaul. She would have sat down to watch with them happily if she wasn’t about to rip her hair out.

When Cadence felt like she could breathe again, she answered Angie’s call.

“Hello?”

“Cady! How are– are you okay? You sound… defeated?”

Cadence sighed, slumping with her back against the wall. She tilted her head back so it could rest on the wall as well, and closed her eyes.

“I’m… trying not to be. It’s not usually all three of them, you know? And it’s easier to take care of my own siblings when they’re sick, because I’m their big sister.”

And I’m not doing it alone.

“You’re basically their big sister, aren’t you the oldest?”

“Yeah, which is insane. I’m not nineteen until February. You guys are babies.”

Cadence heard Angie shifting on the other line, presumably laying in her bed, watching something insane or listening to music as loud as it could go. “Whatever. Back to the defeat, if they’re being assholes, tell them that.”

“No,” Cadence said quickly, sliding down to sit, her knees tucked to her chest. “No, they’re not. They’re being whiney, sick, eighteen year old boys. I’ve got one of those back home, too, it’s not like they’re being unreasonable or anything. It’s just easier with one. Or two. Or if they weren’t trying to razz one another.”

“Do I need to come over there?” Angie was obviously trying to keep hesitance and worry out of her voice, but it didn’t quite sell the way she’d obviously wanted it to.

Cadence couldn’t ask her to come over and be freaked out the entire time, especially when there was a strong chance she’d get sick, too. She was worried about herself at this point, and even though she had a pretty rock-solid system, it wouldn’t have surprised her if she ended up sick by the end of the week, what with the “Campus Crud,” or whatever, running rampant.

“No, that’s okay. Would you mind making a run to the store for me, though? There’s a gold amex in my wallet, you can use that.”

“There’s a gold amex in your wallet?!”

“Mhm,” Cadence said simply, now distracted by trying to think through what she needed Angie to get. “Make sure you have your license on you, because if I have you get cold medicine, they card for that.”

“I– okay but we’re talking about that at some point!”

“Sure,” Cadence said. “I’ll text you a list in a few minutes. None of them have had much of an appetite, but they need to eat something, so maybe I’ll have you grab some soup I can put in the microwave.”

“Microwave soup,” Angie said sagely. “Good for the Campus Crud.”

Cadence laughed, surprising herself. The whole thing was ridiculous. The boys, her position of caretaker, Angie’s fear of illness, and the fact that she was hiding in the hallway. But, as Angie said that, Cadence knew that was exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted to microwave soup, and give medicine, and damp cloths for fevers.

She wanted to take care of her friends while they were sick, because she loved them, and that was showing them that love the best way she knew how.

“Can you also maybe get me a sandwich or something? Cadence found herself saying, straightening and squaring her shoulders. “I’m starving.”

“Anything for our nurse. I’ll leave now.”

“Thanks, Angie.”

“Sure, Cady. Thank you. Love you.”

Cadence smiled, turning the knob of the door to let herself back into the fray. Ru told someone to sashay away, and all three boys erupted into raspy shouts, sniffles, and grumbles of protest.

“Love you too.”

#sickfic #sicktember 2024 #brenna writes things #or at least she tries #hoo au college au #we'll name it some day #starstwinkleplanetsshine #yes Cady is a daughter of Apollo why do you ask

2 notes · View notes

factorialsotherfandoms · 8 months

Text

QSMP x XCOM(2) playlist!

It is subject to change and I will try update it when I add new music. And someday it'll get cover art. For now, though, the track listing as is. It's kinda in 2 sections (songs providing fic titles and then vibe songs). You will note that who I associate things with and who gets the lyrics as their titles don't often match, and I am extremely biased towards my faves, and even more biased to characters I've actually written in this au.

Also of course music is subjective and my analysis is not the only analysis a commenter on ao3 just asked me when I showed them the playlist so I thought I'd share it with everyone.

Each title in the whys also has a link to a youtube version for people without spotify <3

Oh Darling - Plug In Stereo ft. Cady Groves Title music for 'Til Hell Starts To Freeze. Tonally it's massively off track for most of the series, but it's cute and it's fun and I love it.

So just take a chance, try to hold my hand I swear I’d never let go Just let me know if you’d be my man

2. The Call - 2WEI, League of Legends, and Louis Leibfried From the Regret Arc animatic. You know the one. It provides the title to 'Hold The Last Burning Ember', and just generally has very vibes. This is particularly true of any and all of the characters who were involved with the initial invasion. Due to the association with the Regret Arc, I do associate it a little more heavily with the Brazilians, though it's also very appropriate for Philza, BBH, Mariana and, weirdly enough now I think, Spreen.

For the beat and the broken For the lost and forsaken Let us never surrender May we rise unto the call

3. This Will End - The Oh Hellos Title provider for 'The Kind of Love of Which I Speak'. In different places it has the vibes of various different characters - notably Pac and Roier, also kinda Fit but the vibes are all off for him. It's a song which discusses being afraid of being alive, of giving love and never getting it back, of being passively suicidal and welcoming death if it comes but still praying for an ending where you love and are loved in return. There's many ways to read any song and I'm getting more into this one than the others for some reason, but to me it's a song about choosing to keep going when it hurts, to keep loving when you're empty, to see a world with nothing beautiful left and to still believe beauty can be attained. It goes pain-hope-confusion-pain-hope, and idk I just like their music and this one vibes a lot with the whole thing where for a lot of the main characters in this au (and a lot of me writing it) it's not so much about defeating the aliens and winning the war as it is allowing severely hurting people to heal, and those who never had a chance to discover what love is, and to build their families for themselves. A good one just for the vibes of the sort of angst I write.

I can hope how this will end With every line, a comedy That we can learn to love without demand With unreserved honesty

4. Sing Me To Sleep - Alan Walker One of a handful of songs I associate with XCOM2 over before anything else. Lyrics from this song are used mostly-consistently for the entire Mike being kidnapped arc - everything except the bit I wrote way back when with Philza and Fit - from capture to rescue. I am reasonably sure it's about someone dying but eeeeeeh only MCD are people who perma-die in canon! And some of them even get to escape! Because of how I used it I heavily associate this one specifically with Tazercraft, but it does have vibes for a fair few of the more tragic or co-dependent groupings. Romantic or otherwise. Really it should be the memory egg's song, but it isn't. There's also some... darker reads with one of the characters, and how the story ends.

Remember me now, time cannot erase I can hear your whispers in my mind I've become what you cannot embrace Our memory will be my lullaby

5. Duerme Pequeño - Coro San Agustin Again not a super appropriate one atm, but was used for the fic with Trump. It's a Spanish lullaby. I cannot give you a lyrics snip for this one because my Spanish is non-existent and I can neither work out how to find them nor type them by ear. But like. Lullabies are just generally good once the kids are involved in the story.

6. The Only Hope For Me Is You - My Chemical Romance A classic, really. The entire Danger Days album is not inappropriate to this au, and picking out just a few pieces was extremely hard. This was one - specifically it is the song I associate with Cellbit and Felps, though many other groups could use it too. Though, more generally, it's Cellbit about any of the characters he considers friends, doubly so for family, and even himself as he tries to be better in a world that doesn't want to let him. Provides title for 'People Die In Purifying Flame' and also 'Because You're The Only Hope For Me'. Some of the lyrics are a little graphic in context, but the first verse really is hard on the whole everyone dead thing. And just generally Cellbit not doing... great when on his own. But also striving for a better future for the people he loves even if it means destroying himself to save them.

And its partly that last line that makes it Felps not anyone else.

If that's the best that I could be? Than I'd be another memory Can I be the only hope for you? Because you're the only hope for me And if we can't find where we belong We'll have to make it on our own Face all the pain and take it on Because the only hope for me is you alone

7. Anything For You - Ludo Generic title I know, but this is the song I was thinking of when I titled 'Anything For You'. Or rather, the one stuck in my head on a loop. Vibes are very bouncy compared to the rest of this playlist, and it really is any of the combos who are friends or partners or other in this au. It's not... suuuuper fitting but I like it and I used it so it's here. Far better for Happy Ending AU, but frankly both of the aus are heavy on the community as saving the world and only combined are we strong and the best reward is to grow old with your loved ones.

Anything for you All of this is true But the best story that I could ever tell Is the one where I am growing old with you

8. Things We Lost In The Fire - Bastille Is it really a playlist without some Bastille? Look this is literally any group who knew each other pre-invasion - Favela 5, Mystery Twins (though theirs dates back longer), Philza & Fit, BBH & Foolish & Maxo, The French... Provides the title for 'The Future's In Our Hands And We Will Never Be The Same Again', a fic with Mike and Cellbit. And I think it's especially fitting for them, at least out of their combo of 5, because sparks do fly a bit when they interact, no matter the care. I also think it's really good for Bagi in this au? Especially the little bit I've picked out here.

I read them all one day When loneliness came and you were away Oh they told me nothing new But I love to read the words you used

9. The Sound Of Silence - Disturbed Another XCOM2 over QSMP song, largely thanks to the fanmade trailer below (er, violence, explosions, gunsfire, yk)

youtube

Some of the footage in it is XCOM: Enemy Unknown, the game to which XCOM2 is a sequel. But, yeah, song I very associate just with the game and the whole thing. If I haaaaad to attach this to a character it would probably be Philza for... reasons I don't think I've talked about anywhere? Him or Foolish for very different reasons.

Hello darkness, my old friend I've come to talk with you again Because a vision softly creeping Left its seeds while I was sleeping And the vision that was planted in my brain Still remains Within the sound of silence

10. Nemo - Nightwish TBH, I just like it. If I had to pin something down, one answer is Cellbit and another is the three demons. I think I'd specifically pick out Tina for this one. She's not really someone I'd associate with this sort of music, but she's certainly the one who has buried herself the furthest. She would like redemption and she'd like it yesterday, please. Unfortunately, she's also a demonic assassin so... Good luck to her. Really it is just a very cool song, though.

My flower, withered between The pages two and three The once and forever bloom gone with my sins

11. Battle Scars - Paradise Fears (Acoustic Version) Honestly the whole song is great. It's really not anyone specific, but it has very heavy vibes for the whole group. Literally everyone hits beats here. Everyone's fucked up and a fuck up, and they're still gonna try and save their world and drag everyone else along with them gdi.

I'll carry you home No, you're not, alone Keep marching on This. Is. Worth. fighting for You know we've, all got battle scars

12. Plant Life - Owl City My brainworm of the year so far. I'm not really sure what to say about this other than it gives me an extremely specific image and I thiiiiink it's Slimecicle

I've been longing for daisies to push through the floor And I wish plant life would grow all around me So, I won't feel dead anymore So, I won't feel dead anymore

13. Defeated - Bad Suns Again, another song which really could be anyone. And I don't really... have a lot to pick apart on it. So, just enjoy!

I don't wanna be all alone and defeated Who can I be besides me? 'Cause I hate it I don't wanna be left alone, uncompleted, no I don't wanna be all alone and defeated, no

14. Keep You Safe - JJ Heller A lullaby! For all the little eggies I haven't written yet, and their fiercely protective parents. And the gently protective parents. And all the tios and tias who look after them, too. For the 'younger' eggies it's needed, for the 'older' ones maybe it's just good to have someone chase away the awful for you. Either way, their parents will keep the monsters away now. There's nothing to fear in their dreams (except that the monsters who haunt them and want to steal them are very, very real...)

My love is a light Driving away all of your fear So don’t be afraid Remember I made a promise to keep you safe

15. Saints An' Sinners - Whitesnake IDK this again just has vibes. There's something here with Tina once again, but also it really is kinda. There's a whole mess of people in the Order, many of them having done terrible things, many of them having done wonderful things. There's something about the irreverent reverence the song gives to higher powers that just. IDK there's something of the vibes of the group in the tone of the song. A combination of saints and sinners - many of them being both depending who you ask - in a defiance against the order. Given a lot of this song about being thankful sounds sarcastic to my ear oops lol

Saints an' sinners Priests an' thieves Saints an' sinners Priests an' thieves For what we are about to receive May the Lord make us truly thankful

16. Glitter & Gold - Barns Courtney Not sure what to say here. It is just a good song about like... 'I am flesh and I am bone - arise, ting ting, like glitter and gold. I've got fire in my soul, rise up, ting ting, like glitter'. It's a call of life to life, demanding humanity wake up and come forth. Marching song of the order, perhaps, with flesh on their bones and fire in their souls and demanding an answer and demanding the world goes on.

Do you walk in the valley of kings? Do you walk in the shadow of men Who sold their lives to a dream? Do you ponder the manner of things In the dark? The dark, the dark, the dark

17. Enough To Go By - Vienna Teng I am just... this song. Separation and rejoining and its love love love but love might not be enough to save anyone, but you're trying anyway. It's just... Every relationship in this series that hurts. It's Felps and his family, it's Tazercraft, it's Wilbur and Philza, it's Fit and basically anyone, it's Foolish and BBH and Maxo, it's Maxo and Dan, it's Spreen and Missa and Roier in any combination, Aypierre and Maxo, Aypierre and Antoine... The list goes on and on and on of characters who by one definition or another love each other to the world and back and it's never enough. It's coming back after seperation and asking am I good enough yet? I changed have you? I cannot force you to live but please, please, survive. This song is like. The song form of the gentler angst I write.

Would it be enough to go by If we could sail on the wind in the dark Cut those chains in the middle of the night That had you pulled apart Would it be enough to go by If there's moonlight pulling the tide Would it be enough to live on If my love couldn't keep you alive

18. The Fighter - Paradise Fears Again not really sure here, it's just... It's here. It just is. I have nothing clever to say this time. There's a lot of songs some are like that.

Now I do it for the Kids, people said never had a shot Never really caring if tomorrows gonna come or not We're all just a life that fates taking a chance on But this ain't our last dance, so baby dance on

19. Save Yourself, I'll Hold Them Back - My Chemical Romance Not everyone believes they can actually succeed. TBH, most of them don't believe there's a chance of victory, but everyone in the Order is still ready and willing and wanting to raise hell. Raise hell, try change the world, and more than anything else grab their friends' hands and run away together. It's especially true of some of the more... reckless sorts - Roier, Baghera, Foolish, Fit, Etoiles, backstory Philza, etc

I'll tell you well how the story ends Where the good guys die and the bad guys win (who cares?) This ain't about all the friends you made But the graffiti they write on your grave

20. Lady of Worlds - Miracle of Sound Look I haven't played the game this is a song about, but I still very much appreciate it. It's not the vibes for Jaiden, but it's not-not her vibes, you know? Same for Bagi. It's definitely something, though. Maybe you could argue Mouse? You could probably argue mouse.

Time and space on the frailest veil Frozen cold in the static Bloody blades under hatred's sails Tearing out through the fabric

21. Until The End - Breaking Benjamin Confession time - this song I know from Naruto AMVs in my childhood. It really could be any of the characters, but because they are my boys we're handing it to Tazercraft. Yes, both of them. Mostly backstory but frankly neither of them is great. As I said it could quite honestly be any of the characters at times, but I think they are the two who fit it most consistently. Something about there's nothing and you have nothing but you keep going anyway because you refuse to let them win even if you kind of want to die.

Why give up, why give in? It's not enough, it never is So I will go on until the end We've become desolate It's not enough, it never is But I will go on until the end

22. Go Get Your Gun - The Dear Hunter Something something violence something something. I don't think this one needs a whole lot of analysis to explain? The violence has been going on for so long of course it's treated with a combination of exasperation and irreverence.

Go get your gun, get your gun And lets find out what it does Shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot We haven't won, and if we win And if the morning light sets in We've cheated fate again

23. Until The Day Is Done - R.E.M. It is known to be a song about the state of America (in 2008...), but it's also a very good song for just. The weary hopelessness of the situation the characters find themselves in.

As we've written our stories to entertain These notions of glory and bull market gain The teleprompt flutters, the power surge brings An easy speed message falls into routine

24. Laughter Lines - Bastille There's a good number of characters who knew each other and were separated by circumstances, to whom this can apply. But it also can apply to many others, the promise of the chance to grow old, and to do it together. Maybe not in the same place, but circling around and around each other. And like... a lot of them need that a lot of the time. Just pick yourself a ship - romantic or otherwise - and give it a go.

"I'll see you in the future when we're older And we are full of stories to be told Crossin' my heart and hope to die I'll see you with your laughter lines"

25. Working - I Fight Dragons I'll confess, I just wanted something from this album. A couple could have worked, but I liked this one best. It's disillusionment in the current system, whether that be irl or in the au series. It's not really a specific character, but more just the vibe of those who turn away from the Federation not for a specific moment of violence but a simple desire of something more, for something greater. While she's learnt more horrors since Jaiden somewhat falls into this catagory. She didn't leave because of horrors she discovered, she left her cushy admin job because it was just never quite... right. At first it was just a quiet 'this is wrong', and then she saw the horrors once she found other people and it was all peeled back...

Lie to me 'cause honestly I don't believe that you believe The lies you tried to feed to me Like keep your head down Happy isn't free

26. Barricade - Stars If you've done my music rambles before, you know that this is my Fit & Philza song. However in this AU where they've known each other for a very long time - on and off - it somehow is stronger. Apply the hate to hating the system they fight, and the love to them having been a couple in all but name back before the wasteland was sealed and they were forcibly separated, and there we go. It's so good here where they used to fight together, but Philza hung up his sword when the trauma got too much - even now he's support - while Fit went in deeper and harder and more violent. They're still very close, of course, but... Well... It's not what it was before. Ask me to ramble about them. I've written very little but god these two.

In Bermondsey in Burberry, you held me at the barricade, the pigs arrived with tear gas And I wept at the mistakes we made We stalked the streets like animals And danced as windows shattered For our island, for the thrill of it, for everything that mattered

27. Back To The Start - Michael Schulte I don't think it takes a genius to work out why some - many - of the characters would like to reset the timeline and go back to something simpler. I can't decide who this works best for, but probably for someone who was genuinely happy before things got complicated - Maxo, the Quackities, Bagi (even if before was a very long time ago for her)... I think especially, especially Bagi. She's not as stuck as she is in canon, but... She'd still give anything to be ten again and be playing in the woods with her brother.

If I could go, go into my heart And search for all the places I left the spark To find a way, way back to the olden days Before it started falling apart

28. To Them These Streets Belong - Rise Against Again, another how can I not band. I don't have much amazing reasoning here (and might add more from the album some time), just... go listen and you'll probably get it. This song is angry and they are too.

Head hung from shame we bear a weight That brings me to a crawl These years of longing tell decades Of unanswered calls For a change, 'cause everyday we slip and fall Kicked while we're down, our fists clench into ball

29. No Sound But The Wind - Editors And back onto the sad stuff. I don't mean that to be disparaging, but it's true. Very heavy vibes for before they got the airship together. The group was much smaller then, constantly on the move and on foot about it too. Even then, it's a quiet reflection on the state of everything. There aren't many parent-child groups prior to the Eggs, and the Eggs don't remember the before, but... yeeeeah... Sad vibes of the world, sung to someone you want to but cannot protect.

We walk through the ash And the charred remains of our country Keep an eye on my back I'll keep an eye on the road

30. The Beginning After The End - Stars This is mostly a music piece, so you get all the lyrics. Please enjoy it. The sound like a heartbeat building up into music, slowly growing and growing and growing and growing as more things are added, as more joins in. Dropping with a low beat, following through into something a little angrier before gaining back the dance, now merged, less bright but still continuing on. Life in the face of disaster, hope at the end of it all, there will be a morning to doubt what you've done, there will be an end and the music will only get there together. You'll fight and you'll fail and you'll get up and keep going and in the end... Will it be worth it? Well, you just have to get there to answer that, don't you?

Oh, the blood and the treasure And then losing it all The time that we wasted And the place where we fall Will we wake in the morning and know what it was all for? Up in our bedroom After the war

31. Oh, What A Life - American Authors God I don't know what to say here, just every lyric. The talk of burying your soul, forgetting who you are, fields of bodies and a longing for the past, and yet no matter how long it's been or how lost you feel you laugh and you cry and you sing, because you're human, no matter how burnt out you are, no matter the sins you've done, no matter the trauma and the trauma and the trauma and the fear you are still only human and perhaps it's with hysteria that you laugh, with reckless abandon that you dance, but you're laughing and dancing all the same. Maybe you don't accept it, not yet, but perhaps the first step to believing it'll be okay is to say it's fucking shit right now.

But I tried so hard, and we tried so hard And it's a long long road, that you told me so Yeah I tried so hard, to forget where we are And all we do is laugh and we sing

32. Angel With A Shotgun - The Cab It could be many things. This song could be so many things, it could be innocence lost because you're needed, it could be a meditation on holiness and unholiness and the meaninglessness of the distinction in times of crisis, it could just be that sometimes to survive you fuck shit up. But's it's literally called angel with a shotgun and Philza is right fucking there with, you guessed it, a motherfucking shotgun.

Get out your guns, battles begun Are you a saint, or a sinner? If loves a fight, than I shall die With my heart on a trigger

33. Lucky Ones - Lana Del Ray It is, technically, true that the characters in the Order are the lucky ones. They survived the invasion, dodged the kidnappings, escaped the cities and the aliens don't even pretend it's a paradise anymore because people are just used to it. Doesn't mean it feels like it, though. It's a love song, so take your pick of couples, and maybe it's actually sad about love being hard or rare but maybe you can turn it to all the deaths and the horror and the violence and maybe, just maybe, this time they'll get out alive.

Let's get out of this town, baby, we're on fire Everyone around here seems to be going down, down, down If you stick with me, I can take you higher and higher It feels like all of our friends are lost Nobody's found, found, found

34. Polaroid Picture - Frank Turner This was added to the list with the thought of Forever's office and the photographs on the wall, and the clinging to the memories of his friends who have been torn away from him.. If you'd rather not think about him... Well, there's plenty of other characters with close relationships who would do anything to hold onto little memories. And there's plenty of chances that those memories will be all they have left, soon enough...

Let go of the little distractions Hold close to the ones that you love Because we won't all be here this time next year So while you can take a picture of us

35. The Sun Is Also A Warrior - Leslie Fish The Federation does offer global peace, this is true. Under the single government no war continues, via methodology of harshly suppressing life and freedom. And, just as the man in the song learns, perhaps, perhaps, it is not worth it.

"Go rebuild now," the old god said "Feed the living and bury the dead And remember this when you speak of war And think upon what is worth fighting for"

36. That's Okay - The Hush Sound I could say this is about the handful of dead characters, or about the Eggs who have been created and mistreated and abused and just want each other and to be safe, but no. When I listen I don't think of anyone who is actually unloved, I don't think of anyone who will be forgotten - I think of Tazercraft and their inability to believe anyone but each other could ever love them. This was originally the last song on the list, I've just been adding a few more since. I should probably put it back to last but eh.

And when you're gone, will they say your name? And when you're gone, will they love you the same? If not, that's okay.

37. Way Down We Go - KAELO Not a song I know well, but I got it on shuffle and thought the vibes fit. There's nothing clever here, that's it. I've listened to it maybe twice I don't have strong thoughts.

Oh, 'cause they will run you down, down 'til the dark Yes and they will run you down, down 'til you fall And they will run you down, down 'til you go Yeah, so you can't crawl no more

38. Happier - Marshmello, Bastille Again, not one I know well, just vibes. Lyrics wise it could easily be Fit and Spreen, but just listen and vibe and enjoy.

Then only for a minute I want to change my mind 'Cause this just don't feel right to me I wanna raise your spirits I want to see you smile but Know that means I'll have to leave

39. Afraid Of The Dark - Chef'Special Recommended by rabbit-harpist! This song gives me different character vibes in different places, but largely Baghera, Pac, Mike, and Missa. Of all combos. The idea of trying to face your fear and make friends with it is very Missa thing to do, I feel. But the Pac and Mike is the bit about doing better and the utter wreck of either and both of them's mental health, even compared to everyone else. It's still mostly Missa to me. He's doing his best and his best is worth doing and he might be doing it scared and he might want the comfort but gdi he's trying. And Baghera... Poor Baghera, you'll see eventually.

I am still afraid of the dark Even though there's a sky full of stars I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on the run Can you leave a little light on?

40. The London Air Raids - Vian Izak Once again recommended by rabbit-harpist. There's so many pairings - friends and romantic - this one could be. I know Rabbit thinks of Phil/Missa and yes that's a very good one here! I have also deemed this one Felps vibes. With, quite frankly, any of his friends. Frankly it's anything soft but angsty. And, frankly, there's a lot of that in this au. It's like. The vibe. Ripping out splinters and all that.

But I know that I'm safe here with you 'Cause we made it through everything, the old and the new Just wake me up when all this is over Wake me up and tell me it's not true

Honourable Mention: How Far We've Come - Matchbox Twenty Recommended by guestcom2 over on ao3 and they are correct in that this song should, by all rights, be on the playlist. It is nearly perfect. It is however too ingrained in my own mind as associated with a LARP I used to play in for me ever to be able to project anything else onto it. Sorry. >.<

Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend, Let's see how far we've come Let's see how far we've come

#qsmp x xcom #song recs #qsmp au #forever mention #it's very short but it's there so just in case #god this took me so long to write #yes there's a lot of character bias I have my favourites and it's also easier to song for character I've written #or bits of story I'm chewing over #I do have a maybe on some more characters for songs but I need to think them over some more #I am so busy this week so very slow but enjoy the music!

6 notes · View notes