#fucking tag essay lmao

[yappacadaver]

and it's like despite all the awful shit he's done and continues to do, like, i get it. he's employed like 24/7/365. he never got to live a life, despite spending a childhood clinging to the hope of having one someday. He knew companionship and love but lost it and can't ever get it back. His circumstances are so anomalous and gruesome that it completely isolates him from pretty much every other human being on the planet. he knows hell is real and he is basically guaranteed to go there if he can't break this demon curse thing.

like it doesn't make the kidnapping and spreading the curse around any better, but i do get it.

[m0e-ru]

draw souyo. please

yeas boss 🫡

[unexpectedbrickattack]

heehee

heeheehee

Adding some more hcs here bc its under a readmore and therefore confined to the Secret Thoughts box. Obviously suggestive but mostly relationship stuff bc i cannot help myself 😔

So i feel like i am an outlier that really enjoys noise/noisette like i think they are sooo cute…they are just silly guys ! So no this is not ANYONE cheating i must make this soooo clear i am so touchy about this subject; this is my heehee haha safe space LMAO i want to keep that kind of drama faaaar away from me.

A quick tldr for noise (that i will start calling theo bc i think its a cute name LOL i dunno where it came from but i love it im taking it) is that: hes a nepo baby that was able to start a business and brand w that money, and then stayed in a bubble for the rest of his life bc his image and branding is too important to lose. He hung out w the same rich people to network properly and maintain status. He didnt have the time and courage to go into the circles he WANTED to go into.

I had a whole essay written but this is supposed to be a little tldr lmao basically. Hes bi and curious and gus is always extremely overwhelmingly happy and eager to mess around w anyone (also bi) if it means peppino will be there and peppino is like FINE but ur going to get attached to the rat and thats not going to be my fault. This would be after theo starts behaving, as in, starts respecting peppinos boundaries. And he gets to hang out w him peacefully enough times to work up the courage to poke the bear (lol) and ask questions. Bc hes nosy and curious 🥺 they look like they have so much fun at the bar and w whoever they pickup like. Way more fun than he has w his stuffy rich friends. He wants to be there, he wants to have fun 🥺

Anyway he gets to be peppino and gustavos third and it leaves him like this ->💥💥💥💥💥 and gus thinks its so cute lol like this poor possum is worn the hell out 😭 needs to conk out and sleep forever. ‘ONE. That was fun. That was FUN. I want hazel to do that to me’ peppino, wide eyed but like clearly flabbergasted and smiling incredulously: ‘YEAH? REALLY ? I MEAN. DIDNT UH. DIDNT KNOW SHE HAD THAT IN HER. OR WHATEVER.’

‘TWO. Would u do this again? Like that was fun. That was FUN. I wanna do that again. I think im too busy this week and next week but like. Is that an option? I can push stuff around so it can fit in ur schedule??’ And peppino LAUGHS like full body laughing hard enough that gus comes back w a water looking so confused. Hes like oh my god. You dont have to cancel shit for a dick appointment !!! You dont!! Oh my god!!! Hes like crying laughing at the thought of theo having to cancel an appointment so he can squeeze in his threesome 😭😭😭 and theo cant help but look A LITTLE red bc okay it sounds silly BUT no one said no and he will run w that lol

Also convinces hazel to get a strap at some point. Which i think is so funny bc i have a scene in my head of noise being so smarmy w peppino and gus like ooohhh so u needed dick to be normal again and not be rude? Was that all it took? And now theo is thinking back to what he said as hes laying down in bed after getting thoroughly pegged by his gf and hes like oughhgh……i get it……

[fennel-tea]

That Awful OTP Meme, or: my Binah/Hod manifesto

I originally posted this on twitter but while this is mostly tongue-in-cheek I actually have a lot of thoughts on these two that are generally summarized by [god DAMN I love the interplay of two people who are varying degrees of Terrible]

or just, like, a Hannigram meme.

[ohtendril]

two of you. always in sync

[themyscirah]

But look at us Luke, we're the ones left alone, holding some rich monster's pain. All of existence, built on his violence. All of space-time, humming to life with a single inviolate rule. Give the hero something to punch.

[edgelordtozier]

the steddie fics where steve is embarrassingly air-headed and has no clue what bisexuality is even though his best friend is a lesbian are so funny to me (in a bad way). it’s like what’s another way that we can mercilessly infantilize him and make eddie munson (pathetic clueless loser) guide him and navigate the relationship as if steve hasn’t been in many relationships himself?

[sb25p]

Warning: THE LAST OF US SPOILERS: EPISODE 5!!! IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED EP 5, PLEASE SCROLL PAST!!!!!

Also this an essay!! 🥴 tbh I write these more for myself than anything else…my Tumblr is my mf journal.

I normally don’t like to write posts that involve spoilers for current series/movies etc but TLOU episode 5 affected me in such a powerful way, I feel like I just need to vent it for a min.

Can we talk about the final scene? How hopeful Ellie is when she wakes up only to find out Sam has unfortunately become infected. Sam then attacking Ellie for Joel and Henry to realise what’s happening and Henry to raise the gun to Joel.

The actor, Lamar Johnson, absolutely killed that role (no pun intended…too soon?)

Like we see his face go from confused to protective yet terrified, shocked, panicked, regretful, devastated, remorseful, angry and numb.

I could go on and on about the diversity of emotions that Lamar portrayed in that moment to capture the reaction of Henry losing Sam. The one person he loves more than anything and has sacrificed everything for only to lose at what he believes to be his own hands but as we know is due to being infected.

It was never Henry’s fault. Henry didn’t kill Sam. Sam was already dead. The infection took him. Henry actually saved Ellie from being harmed by Sam. He’s still a hero regardless of what he’s done. He continued to protect others but without Sam, what is his purpose? Sam to Henry is purpose. He always has been. Now that Sam is gone, Henry doesn’t feel any purpose and ultimately that causes him to take his own life without any hesitation.

Then we have the other parallel of Pedro Pascal in that situation playing the role of Joel Miller.

We see Joel (not for the first time) jumping in ultimately to protect Ellie. He’s terrified. He’s seeing her at risk and scared and she’s calling out to him in that moment for help.

Joel talks earlier to Henry about being relied on. He says that it’s easier for kids because no one is relying on them but that’s not really true is it? Because although Sam relied on Henry for protection, Henry relied on Sam for purpose. He loved him. He lived for him because he had Sam by his side.

What really got me in that moment after Henry shoots Sam, is Joel. The way his face turns into a realisation. An understanding.

It doesn’t happen right away.

I feel if you watch Joel’s face just after Sam dies, he’s asking for the gun because he’s afraid Henry will turn on the both of them, pin a blame on them maybe that Sam got infected because of them but when Henry says “what did I do?” You can see that Joel’s face falls. He goes from appearing assertive and protective of Ellie to becoming understanding and gentle towards Henry.

I think that is because Joel recognises that feeling all too well. It’s not hard to think that Joel would have had a time after Sarah’s death where he must have thought that life wasn’t worth living anymore. That his purpose in life has been ripped from him so abruptly and if his sole purpose now is merely to survive, what kind of life does he have anyway?

It’s why I always saw Joel to be one of the strongest characters in the whole of the TLOU universe. He was a father to an only child who was taken from him during the time the world was falling apart anyway. Not only was his own beautiful little world ended in that split second, the one he shared with his daughter, the whole planet was being ripped apart.

What motivated him to keep on living? We could say Tommy but a parents love like Joel’s is so incredibly powerful. Even my own parents once said to me (and I’m one of four children) that if I ever took my own life, they couldn’t go on themselves without me. The true love of a parent is absolutely infinitely one of the most powerful things in this world. Pedro absolutely portrayed that emotion in the moment when he’s trying to talk Henry down. It’s like he’s mentally saying “look at me, I understand, PLEASE, I understand”. Joel knows they’re not at risk to Henry at that moment, Henry is at risk to himself.

Not only that but Joel asks Ellie if she’s okay shortly after Sam dies and even tries to go to her but is stopped by Henry raising the gun to him.

We see Joel becoming softer and more of a father figure to Ellie in this situation. His usual hardened expression drops when he has just witnessed a serious threat to Ellie’s life. He can see the distress in her. He’s just watched her bond with a child over a period of time that she clearly felt very strongly for very quickly. He also has strong feelings about Ellie watching others die due to the discussion he has with her when she shoots the man in the previous episode to protect Joel.

“You’re just a kid. You shouldn’t know what it means to…” to kill someone he means.

He doesn’t want her to witness this world. He wants to protect her from it and we’re seeing so much more of that in these newer episodes. The paternal feelings he’s developing for her are slowly but surely finding their way out into the open.

And finally the note that Ellie leaves on Sam’s grave.

“I’m sorry.”

We see Joel realising when he reads this, that this young girl feels a lot more than she’s giving out. That Joel is starting to come to terms with how much of a weight is sitting on Ellie’s shoulders by being treat like a possible cure. That the thought of her feeling as though it’s her fault that she couldn’t save Sam from infection, ultimately has Joel feeling even more responsible for ensuring she doesn’t feel that way and that she understands how important she is in herself rather than to the rest of the crumbling world.

I really look forward to seeing how their relationship develops. Particularly, how Joel’s feelings develop further towards Ellie. I also look forward to seeing more vulnerability from Ellie. Joel walks around with this hardened expression but Ellie doesn’t need to do anything like that. We know from how she admits to Sam that she fears being left alone, that she has a lot of emotion she is holding back. She needs that someone to be vulnerable with and I can’t wait for her to let it all go for Joel.

[brookheimer]

Thinking about the Roy’s and the summer of competitive eating disorders….

honest to god all i’ve been thinking about since i saw that script‼️ like especially w shiv and rome it’s just…… ouch. sooooo fucking much to say about all of that and all of its implications like i am so unwell

[hella1975]

ur making it pretty hard to not be curious about aftg like what is going on can you infodump ur worst to me

so basically it's about a guy called neil who's not actually called neil bc turns out he's the son of a HIGHLY abusive mafia hitman and him and his mother have been running from this guy for years which ofc means changes in identity and a SHIT ton of issues ranging from good old fashioned paranoia to lighting cigarettes not to smoke them but to let them burn down bc the smell reminds you of your mother's burning corpse. but neil is obsessed and i mean OBSESSED with this made up sport called exy which is like lacrosse but with the violence of ice hockey and he joins a pro-team despite aforementioned ABUSIVE MAFIA DAD AFTER HIM and guess what! the guy who signed him is called kevin and his ex-team are affiliated with the mafia too! including neil's dad! neil just screwed himself over big time! but who cares when you have exy! enter: andrew minyard. andrew is a blonde, 5ft, ex-juvie, under-court-surveillance-for-grevious-bodily-harm goalkeeper currently working unofficially as kevin's bodyguard and, while we never get an actual diagnosis bc god forbid we handle mental health properly in this thing, it's implied that he has some kind of psychosis and, as part of his plea bargain, is legally obgligated to take incredibly mood-altering medication that makes him manic in exchange for being allowed to stay on the team (aka with kevin who he's VERY possessive of), done entirely for the wellbeing of those around him and effectively against andrew's will. does he stick to that deal? fuck no! but it doesn't stop there! andrew proceeds to spend the entire book being as violent and unpredictable and generally cunty as possible in order to figure out What Neil's Deal Is bc neil is capital S Shifty and andrew is convinced he's from kevin's old mafia cult team trying to hurt him. we spend an entire book watching the three of them wrestle between neil's paranoia, andrew's protectiveness and kevin's desire to Please Can We Just Play Exy. there are some keys involved. someone dies. there are two more books. inexplicably two of the characters can speak fluent german purely from high school classes.

[jojea]

My brother.. might be dead…

[That’s why I k̶̻̉ī̴̬l̸̼͋l̵̨̈́e̷͎̽d̶̜̔ them.]

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

jeremiah and reeve in canon meetup WHENNNNN

[cardworksartblog]

Their friendship is actually so special to me,.,,, fucked up bug and her Little Guy friend who may or may not be a fucking parasite. They make me go insane

[keiicom]

why does park taejoon have to write women like that 💀💀💀

like. listen. I've been reading Lookism for the past two years. I enjoy reading it. I don't love it, but it's entertaining and (most of the time) I can tell what's going on. I think some of the characters are nice, and root for them. Having said that.

It sooooo doesn't pass the Bechdel test 😭😭😭 and having none of the girls be plot relevant, PLUS having 99% of them be shit at fighting (except Mary and Sophia my zero screen time queens) or actively becoming liabilities/being the damsel in distress, PLUS drawing them Like That is just. pick a struggle bro 😭

somebody needs to tell him women have ribs too 💀

[filthyjanuary]

these people are actually on crack cocaine

[the-holy-ghosted]

how would you like to respond to this ask with absolutely as much as you can possibly say about the terror. it does not need to be comprehensible. just say things until you can no longer say things. let it all out. or let some of it out and let the rest of it spill over into the tags of reblogged gifsets, i have no qualms with either. this is entirely to give you another avenue with which to go as feral as you would like. have fun!!

hey anon quite frankly i would love to start talking incessently about the terror and also im gonna kiss you on the lips for asking me to

one thing ive been thinking about a lot after rewatching the whole season maybe. three or four times now (i am not mentally sound) is just how much the theme throughout the show is Being Something You Are Not. and its such a gradual realization cause you start with one character but the more you think about it you realize how that theme affects everybody and everything about the show.

i read something in an analysis post written by somebody MUCH more eloquent than me about Silna and Crozier and the parallel of them being thrust into a responsibility they didn't want. Silna was forced into a role that she knew she could not handle and it fails on her! multiple times! despite having NOTHING to do with everything going wrong shes been shoved into everyone's field of vision as The One Responsible INCLUDING by her own community. and by all means she does try to fill those shoes but even Tuunbaq has a say and it doesn't want her. and by the time she tries again its already too late.

and Crozier's situation wasn't identical but it's very similar in the sense that he did not want to be here and do this. being the only one not volunteered, but *asked* to go on this expedition, having already not been what Sophia wanted but doing as she asks anyways. good grief the man is in the middle of writing his resignation letter to sir john when he gets mauled. and now hes got no choice and that ALSO fails on him and gets people hurt and eventually its too late for him to make anything better.

but once you notice it with somebody else its like oh! that's right! EVERYBODY is doing this. sir john wasn't anybody's choice to lead the expedition and in fact he is actively detrimental to everybody's safety with his choices. Fitzjames is not half the man he says he is and has actively been lying To Everybody about about who he is an his accomplishments Forever. Goodsir is NOT a doctor and despite how happy it seems to make him to be considered as such he knows its not true and all of that scientific knowledge ends up killing SO many people. Hickey thinks hes hot shit and thinks he can gain control of everybody else AND Tuunbaq and yet he can hardly even do his own dirty work and gets other people's hands dirty before he does it himself.

i mean if you think about it too even the landscape isn't what it seems. they all think its a conquerable land and then they get there and realize its not. and because of this, they assume that must mean there's no way to survive out there. except there IS. there IS wonder. it IS beautiful. life CAN thrive out there and it HAS they are just so hazardous and invasive to the environment that they don't get to see it!!! they don't see the wonder and they are trekking to their deaths amongst a COMPLETE lie. this isn't, like, News to anybody else who's watched the show i just noticed how it all connects everybody and it blew my mind a little bit