#general trans discourse

[velvetvexations]

I’ve seen multiple posts at this point that are just wildly against pronoun circles/sharing pronouns and it’s just baffling to me. When did we decide that’s a bad thing isn’t this what we were fighting for. Also. And I can’t stress this enough. You do not have to put yourself in a pronoun circle! You do not! You aren’t bound to an oath of truth you can just stay closeted if you don’t feel safe/just want to for whatever reason! I’m just so sick of people thinking it’s always bad to share pronouns. I’m a nonbinary trans person who presents as a binary man. I’m not whipping out the they/them/it/its in every scenario. But also, if no one ever asks, I’ll never get a chance. I’m just so tired.

a lot of binary trans people who pass have decided "fuck you got mine"

edit: see responses

[matcha-omega]

EVIL TRANSMASC

A flag for when you're EVIL and transmasc

EVIL Color meanings:

Red: The BLOOD of transandrophobes. also for EVIL gnc transmascs yay yippee yay :3

Cyan: Our TWISTED agenda (supporting our fellow transmascs and the trans community as a whole)

Navy Blue: Our SCARY masculinity/manhood

Blueish Black: Our DARK brotherhood

[lastoneout]

> them: our community is trans inclusive

> me: is it actually trans inclusive or is it just adhering to the gender binary but with trans people forced into the same ridged expectations and assumed positions of power or vulnerablility that cis people are?

> them: what do you mean

> me: *pulls out a chart explaining how gender essentialism is inherently harmful even if you count trans men and women as men and women because the very concepts of man and woman under this framework are so restrictive and reductive that they can not account for the diverse and complex intersectional experiences of trans men/women(or even marginalized cis people) and will also never be able to make a space safe for intersex, nonbinary, and multigender people*

> them: haha it's trans inclusive ma'am- I mean they

> I look inside

> it's ridged adherence to the gender binary

[cardentist]

I'm not blaming the op of the original post, or trying to imply anything about them as a person. and I don't want to single out this post in particular, because the issue is an broadly reaching trend rather than any one individual happening to write a post in five minutes one time.

but I really Really wish we'd stop and think if it's a good idea to say "girls turning into boys makes them inherently less interesting" on the transgender website

picking a privileged group to be the butt of a joke because it's lighthearted when nobody's actually getting hurt by doing so Only Works when everyone within that group is actually privileged. making jokes about how men are lesser than doesn't Actually affect the people who are actually within power, but Does chip away at the confidence and comfort of marginalized men who are In these communities to be exposed to it.

and the issue isn't about any one joke or poorly worded discussion in particular, but it's difficult to articulate why it can feel so alienating and unsafe to have things like this be so common within my communities without sounding ridiculous or risk being made fun of for not being able to take a joke. because the framing of implied privilege makes it easy to twist those feelings alienation into the entitlement that's assumed with men taking issue with being the butt Of a joke.

I simply think "this type of person is inherently lesser than" should be reexamined and thrown out as a talking point, even in a lighthearted context. because there will always be vulnerable people within those groups who already Hear that they are lesser than for existing

[velvetvexations]

super agree with this except to add that it also wouldn't be bad if some people liked particular kinds of bodies either anyway, I'm not going to assume a cis lesbian would necessarily be into me as a trans woman that doesn't pass but it's totally fine if that's the case and equally anyone could have trans women as a, idk how else to phrase this, "type"? without being creeps

but like, maybe "genital preference" is not quite what I'm imagining? because I've seen it referred to in a way before that makes me feel like maybe it's more than just "oh sorry I'm not really into cock" or "oh sorry I'm exclusively into cock" or something like that, I might be missing something

Also the idea that t4t is based on some kind of "genital preference" (as "c4c", whatever that is, would be) is blatantly ridiculous, that's not the point and it never has been. Trans people seek out other trans people because dating cis people can be genuinely dangerous. Yes, other trans people are hot, obviously, but also thinking other trans people are hot is absolutely NOT the same as a "genital preference," and to equate the two is to uphold extremely transphobic ideas about what trans people's genitalia are and what we do with them. Come on

[velvetvexations]

I definitely think way too many people read like...ridiculous levels of bad faith in pronoun circles especially in portraying them all as cis initiatives seeking to "performatively" engage with trans people, or even worse, microaggress them, which is the transradfem angle

but I also get how they could be a Lot to suddenly have to deal with on the spot and if you're not out yet, I think they'd be best in situations where they're listed ahead of time like at scheduled events, idk, I'm not really the best at constructing social dynamics but I do like the idea a lot in theory specifically because it feels very much like an act of compassion that would put me at ease and also give me the chance to signal my gender without wearing my "not like other girls" shirt literally everywhere

[justdavina]

@justdavina of San Francisco AI Fashion 2025

[freyholland]

That era of my life predates my tumblr one, but I was a very big Leliana fan back in the day. I actually got into a debate in one of my Queer Studies courses back in college because someone brought her up as an example of Bad Queer Rep because she was “crazy”. I nearly started hurling chairs

[macbethz]

Y’all love to invent conflicts that aren’t happening. Trans women and trans men are not like battling it out anywhere except twitter dot com we are too busy making out with each other

[velvetvexations]

honestly I'd be really happy if the current backlash against pronoun circles really is way less of an exorsexist/anti-GNC thing than it's been assumed to be and half or more of it is just people with totally legitimate complaints, many themselves non-binary or GNC

I'm more on the side of "pronoun circles should be Fixed" but discourse that's actual discourse worth having with people who aren't acting in bad faith is a miracle

[anarcho-catboyism]

Internet culture has made certain very miserable crowds of people assume that anything that confuses or discomforts them is a personal attack directed at them, and that pain from the "attack" is a good enough reason for them to lash out with projected insecurities to make themselves feel better about their own miserable situations

[pigeonphd]

another day another otherwise decent tumblr post about the performance of masculinity that ends with a snide remark about how "tme's dont understand because they will never have to experience this" like. wait a minute. are you under the impression. that trans men never have their masculinity policed in "polite" society. do you think that when trans men's genders are questioned their masculinity is not also questioned. do you think the patriarchy is like...... chill about transmasculinity?????

[mint-mumbles]

Gonna make a list of queer characters that don’t outright state their queerness because a certain group of people complaining about the handling of a certain character’s arc from a certain game is pissing me off

“They didn’t make her say she was trans so that means that they’re giving us a ‘fuck you’/we need confirmation or it isn’t valid and transphobes will be transphobic/they’re queerbaiting!”

Shut the fuck up

The fact that we’re even at this point is a miracle in itself and needing every character to explicitly say their orientation and/or gender identity shows how ignorant you are, not just regarding media literacy, but also on queer history

By your myopic lens you’re discrediting a lot of queer characters that didn’t and/or couldn’t outright say that they’re queer

Characters shouldn’t have to outright say their orientation and/or gender identity for you to consider them “good rep”

That perspective is ridiculously narrow minded and downplays the importance of previous queer characters that helped pave the way to where we are now

Update: Here it is!

[softness-and-shattering]

.

[velvetvexations]

I've noticed shimigami eyes marking a lot of people green when they're very actively and outwardly transphobic, they're just transphobic towards trans mascs or nonbinary people. it was honestly genuinely shocking the first time around (and the next few after that), but by now I'm more than a little wary about it.

it's not necessarily Surprising to hear that it's falsely flagging people as transphobic now, but it Is disappointing

this is why we can't have nice things