#glad I have a big story-rooted stop sign

[cupophrogs]

5 words.

My.

Classmates.

Shipped.

Them.

Like.

Crazy.

Over 18 people finna go to jail for this one-

oh hell nah

[freddiemercurylegendabovelegends]

Today - March 12th, 1974 - Queen Story!

Interview with Freddie Mercury – NME

by Julie Webb

It was clear for all to see that Queen’s Freddie Mercury wasn’t in the best of health. His hair lacked the recent attention of heated curling tongs; a cold sore was erupting above his upper lip; and horror – seems he’d not been able to summon enough strength to apply Biba black nail polish to more than one hand.

Mercury was worried as the camera lens zoomed in on him. He beseeched us to “touch up the picture to remove the cold sore if you can.”

I know it sounds like we’re setting the guy up, but he takes it all in good heart. Why, last time we met he stated he was “gay as a daffodil” – and here he was, willingly holding a daffodil in hand, outside Buckingham Palace. He posed regally, shirt temporarily coming unhitched from his trousers, revealing a hairy chest.

The British tour sapped most of the Mercury energy. Bedridden with laryngitis when it finished, he had just a few free days to repair any mental or physical damage before Queen joined Mott The Hoople on their two-month tour of America.

He is, in short pretty knackered – and if the American tour seems to be happening too soon after Britain, there’s no way he can change things.

I’d like a couple of weeks off, but you’ve got to push yourself. But we’re at a stage in our careers, my dear, where it’s just got to be done. I shall be resting on my laurels soon…”

He stops, considers the last remark and realises he may have said the wrong thing. Hurriedly he comes in with, “To put it another way, I shall try and reap my profits. I’ve worked my ass off these past few months. I’ve worked till I’ve dropped and after a while you physically can’t do it.”

Didn’t he think the British tour was a bit too busy, what with so many gigs included. “Yes it was a heavy tour, but it put us in a different bracket overnight. It’s a tour we had to do and I think now we’ve done it we can do the next British tour on our own terms, exactly how we like.

“With this tour we were booked in well beforehand at semi-big venues and, by the time we came to doing them, we had the album out, we’d got a bit of TV exposure and everything escalated. I think if we’d waited we could have done all the big venues – it’s just a matter of timing. But I’m glad we did the tour when we did. Even though there was a lot of physical and mental strain – so many things to worry about other than the music.”

A situation not improved by the fact that all members of Queen are, according to Mercury, “very highly strung”. Add to that his admitted bad temper. “I’m very emotional. Whereas before, I was given time to make my decisions, now nearly all of us are so highly strung we just snap. We always argue but I think it’s a healthy sign because we get to the root of the matter and squeeze the best out. But lately so much is happening, it’s escalating so fast that everybody wants to know almost instantly, and I certainly get very temperamental.”

“You’ve got to know where to draw the line. But the public always come first – it’s a corny thing to say but I mean it. Lately I’ve been throwing things around which is very unlike me. I threw a glass at someone the other day. I think I’m going to go mad in a few years time; I’m going to be one of those insane musicians.”

It’s at this point that I begin to wonder about Mercury. On stage he lords it around like some old slag. Offstage, he’s vain, camp – yet a nice enough dude.

He just has an unfortunate way with him during interviews, coming out with quotes and stories that are bound to be misconstrued or lay him wide open to mickey-taking. This could well account for some of the unkind press the band have received.

“I think, to an extent, we are a sitting target because we gained popularity quicker than most bands and we’ve been talked about more than any other band in the last month, so it’s inevitable. Briefly, I’d be the first one to accept fair criticism. I think it would be wrong if all we got were good reviews – but it’s when you get unfair, dishonest reviews where people haven’t done their homework that I get annoyed.” Unlike many British bands, they’ve waited until the time was right and are appearing on the same bill as Mott, who will assuredly pull in large crowds.

So the present and the future seem well assured I enquire about the past – like, what kind of family background does a guy like Mercury have?

“Middle-class. Musicians aren’t social rejects any more. If you mean; Have I got upper class parents who put a lot of money into me? Was I spoilt? – no. My parents were very strict. I wasn’t the only one, I’ve got a sister, I was at boarding school for nine years so I didn’t see my parents that often. That background helped me a lot because it taught me to fend for myself.”

Boarding school… if we are to believe stories that circulate about boarding schools – brutish behaviour, homosexual goings-on – well, the mind positively boggles in Freddie Mercury’s case.

I broach the subject…

“it’s stupid to say there is no such thing in boarding schools. All the things they say about them are more or less true. All the bullying and everything else. I’ve had the odd schoolmaster chasing me. It didn’t shock me because somehow boarding schools… you’re not confronted by it, you are just slowly aware of it. It’s going through life.”

So was he the pretty boy who everyone wanted to lay?

“Funnily enough, yes. Anybody goes through that. I was considered the arch poof.”

So how about being bent?

“You’re a crafty cow. Let’s put it this way, there were times when I was young and green. It’s a thing schoolboys go through. I’ve had my share of schoolboy pranks. I’m not going to elaborate further.”

Oh dear. And just when we were doing so well.

📸 Pic: 1974 - Freddie Mercury posing

[freddieraimbow74]

12 March 1974, New Musical Express conducted an interview with Freddie Mercury by Julie Webb

“Highly Strung? We Fight Over Hair Spray”

It was clear for all to see that Queen’s Freddie Mercury wasn’t in the best of health. His hair lacked the recent attention of heated curling tongs; a cold sore was erupting above his upper lip; and horror – seems he’d not been able to summon enough strength to apply Biba black nail polish to more than one hand.

Mercury was worried as the camera lens zoomed in on him. He beseeched us to “touch up the picture to remove the cold sore if you can.”

I know it sounds like we’re setting the guy up, but he takes it all in good heart. Why, last time we met he stated he was “gay as a daffodil” – and here he was, willingly holding a daffodil in hand, outside Buckingham Palace. He posed regally, shirt temporarily coming unhitched from his trousers, revealing a hairy chest.

The British tour sapped most of the Mercury energy. Bedridden with laryngitis when it finished, he had just a few free days to repair any mental or physical damage before Queen joined Mott The Hoople on their two-month tour of America.

He is, in short pretty knackered – and if the American tour seems to be happening too soon after Britain, there’s no way he can change things.

I’d like a couple of weeks off, but you’ve got to push yourself. But we’re at a stage in our careers, my dear, where it’s just got to be done. I shall be resting on my laurels soon…”

He stops, considers the last remark and realises he may have said the wrong thing. Hurriedly he comes in with, “To put it another way, I shall try and reap my profits. I’ve worked my ass off these past few months. I’ve worked till I’ve dropped and after a while you physically can’t do it.”

Didn’t he think the British tour was a bit too busy, what with so many gigs included. “Yes it was a heavy tour, but it put us in a different bracket overnight. It’s a tour we had to do and I think now we’ve done it we can do the next British tour on our own terms, exactly how we like.

“With this tour we were booked in well beforehand at semi-big venues and, by the time we came to doing them, we had the album out, we’d got a bit of TV exposure and everything escalated. I think if we’d waited we could have done all the big venues – it’s just a matter of timing. But I’m glad we did the tour when we did. Even though there was a lot of physical and mental strain – so many things to worry about other than the music.”

A situation not improved by the fact that all members of Queen are, according to Mercury, “very highly strung”. Add to that his admitted bad temper. “I’m very emotional. Whereas before, I was given time to make my decisions, now nearly all of us are so highly strung we just snap. We always argue but I think it’s a healthy sign because we get to the root of the matter and squeeze the best out. But lately so much is happening, it’s escalating so fast that everybody wants to know almost instantly, and I certainly get very temperamental.”

“You’ve got to know where to draw the line. But the public always come first – it’s a corny thing to say but I mean it. Lately I’ve been throwing things around which is very unlike me. I threw a glass at someone the other day. I think I’m going to go mad in a few years time; I’m going to be one of those insane musicians.”

It’s at this point that I begin to wonder about Mercury. On stage he lords it around like some old slag. Offstage, he’s vain, camp – yet a nice enough dude.

He just has an unfortunate way with him during interviews, coming out with quotes and stories that are bound to be misconstrued or lay him wide open to mickey-taking. This could well account for some of the unkind press the band have received.

“I think, to an extent, we are a sitting target because we gained popularity quicker than most bands and we’ve been talked about more than any other band in the last month, so it’s inevitable. Briefly, I’d be the first one to accept fair criticism. I think it would be wrong if all we got were good reviews – but it’s when you get unfair, dishonest reviews where people haven’t done their homework that I get annoyed.” Unlike many British bands, they’ve waited until the time was right and are appearing on the same bill as Mott, who will assuredly pull in large crowds.

So the present and the future seem well assured I enquire about the past – like, what kind of family background does a guy like Mercury have?

“Middle-class. Musicians aren’t social rejects any more. If you mean; Have I got upper class parents who put a lot of money into me? Was I spoilt? – no. My parents were very strict. I wasn’t the only one, I’ve got a sister, I was at boarding school for nine years so I didn’t see my parents that often. That background helped me a lot because it taught me to fend for myself.”

Boarding school… if we are to believe stories that circulate about boarding schools – brutish behaviour, homosexual goings-on – well, the mind positively boggles in Freddie Mercury’s case.

I broach the subject…

“it’s stupid to say there is no such thing in boarding schools. All the things they say about them are more or less true. All the bullying and everything else. I’ve had the odd schoolmaster chasing me. It didn’t shock me because somehow boarding schools… you’re not confronted by it, you are just slowly aware of it. It’s going through life.”

So was he the pretty boy who everyone wanted to lay?

“Funnily enough, yes. Anybody goes through that. I was considered the arch poof.”

So how about being bent?

“You’re a crafty cow. Let’s put it this way, there were times when I was young and green. It’s a thing schoolboys go through. I’ve had my share of schoolboy pranks. I’m not going to elaborate further.”

Oh dear. And just when we were doing so well. 💛

This interview was published April 1974

📷 Freddie and Julie Webb, March 1974, photo by Joe Stevens

[cyncerity]

um, how did Tommy meet ranboo in the epic au? Also how is the leaf/growth kingdom going v the decay/mold kingdom? What’s going on with ranboo?

ok, i was gonna just answer this with a normal answer, but here’s a story instead cause I really like how they met and wanted to start up the lore!! So I hope you like it!

tw: fear of death ig

Tommy was tired. He was tired of his shitty dad, his broken kingdom, and his horrible status as their practically bastard prince. He hated it all. He needed an escape, if just for a day. Somewhere where people didn’t freeze when they saw him, refusing to even look at him for fear of potentially angering a member of their royal family. Somewhere away from all the noise and obligation and far, far away from the kingdom he’d grown to hate that he’ll someday be forced to lead.

In retrospect, the Bogs may not have been the best option.

He trudged through the thick mud, tripping up on roots almost every other step, feet plastered with clay and weighing him down with every step. He panted and wiped the sweat from his brows, adrenaline the only thing keeping him from feeling the cold air around him. Yeah, definitely not the best option.

At first he’d been glad to get out of the harsh sun that seemed to shine fucking constantly in his forest, but past the border of the Bogs, there was nothing. Seriously, literally fucking nothing. He’d seen this area from afar before, known that this land was filled with nothing but rot and darkness, but fucking lord he didn’t think it would be this bad. Maybe there was a reason this place was illegal to enter.

Other than it’s, y’know, horrifying murderous residents.

That was the only real reason Tommy had thought it would be a bad idea to come here. No sun? Fine. Lots of mud? Sure, he can handle that. Terrifying creatures of rot that have been at odds with his own species for practically as long as he’s been alive and who his kingdom had fought one of the most brutal wars either side have ever fought with? Eh, best 2 out of 3.

In reality, that…really didn’t seem to be a problem. He hadn’t seen a boggin the entire time he’s been here. Hell, he hadn’t seen any sign that this section of the first was even lived in. At first he was afraid that meant an ambush could be coming, but at this point he’d take a potential kidnapping if it meant he’d get off his feet for a minute.

He wasn’t entirely sure how long he dragged himself through the mud, it had to have been the majority of the day at that point, but he eventually found a big enough log that led out of the mud and near to a tree with a decent sized hole in it. He could have cried in relief.

He hauled himself onto it, having to relent to crawling since he could no longer stand. He made his was across and collapsed into the hollowed out trunk, limbs shaking from exhaustion. He was…so fucking tired. He was sure that the second he stopped shaking, his adrenaline would wear off and the chill of the forest would return, and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to pass out before or after then. God, would he have the strength to get back up if he passed out? How long has it been since he saw the sun, since he had any energy?

After only a few minutes, he’d been left practically paralyzed. He couldn’t lift his limbs and his eyelids were growing heavier by the second. He was helpless. He…he would die there, and no one would ever know what happened. Maybe the boggins would be kind enough to bury his body, though he doubted it. He’d just be another leafman lost in this dull, dead part of the forest, just like his m-

He was snapped out of his thoughts as he felt a gust of air on his face, growling steadily heavier until it was strong enough to push back the petals on his head. He heard strong, loud wing beats, and through his barely opened eyes he could see a giant bird (bigger than any bird he saw back at home, anyway) landing on the log he used to get to the tree. Was he about to be eaten? God, why couldn’t he have passed out before he was mauled by a bird?

Instead, though, he saw a blurry figure hastily leap off the bird and run up to him. He couldn’t make out many details, but they were…dull. They matched their surroundings almost perfectly, muted tones of brown in their clothes and purple in their skin. The only off bit was their jacket, which seemed to be made of two contrasting fur tones, black on one side and white on the other.

“Oh shit, oh my god,” He heard them mumble as they moved closer, kneeling to the ground next to Tommy, taking him in their arms. They were…big. That was the next bit Tommy realized. Not huge, but noticeably a lot bigger than him, or anyone he’d met. Maybe only by a head or two, but even their hands were the size of Tommy’s chest. And even being so close to him now, Tommy’s vision had blurred enough that he couldn’t make out much of the rest of them. The stranger felt around under his chin and around his wrist, pressing down as their breathing started to grown frantic. “Oh god, ok, ok…” they said, trying to calm themselves down before tapping Tommy’s face. “I need a sign you’re still alive, if you can hear me at all. Can you give me a sign?”

Tommy was never usually one to take orders, but this seemed kind of important. Fuck stranger danger, this person was his only hope and he didn’t want to die here. He hated his dad, he hated his kingdom, he hated his future, but he didn’t hate his life. He had things to do, he had to grow and learn and be better. He had to practice magic to keep the forest balanced and safe, he was supposed to learn hand-to-hand combat with Techno, he was supposed to hang out with Tubbo tomorrow and help him with his shop, he couldn’t die.

He tried his best to muster any movement at all, anything to show his good samaritan that he was alive and needed help, that he wasn’t just a corpse to be left behind, but nothing. Not a twitch, a wink, nothing. The stranger above him sat patiently waiting for a sign that Tommy couldn’t give them, and he wasn’t sure how patient this person was. He wasn’t sure when they would give up and leave him to die. This couldn’t be happening. He had the chance to live, but his stupid fucking body couldn’t move without energy, and the sun was well hidden by the fucking bog trees. “oh god, you can’t be dead…” he heard the stranger whisper, voice quivering like they were about to cry as the arms around him started to shake.

Oh, like fucking hell he was dead.

Somehow, miraculously, he tapped into something as he barely managed to twitch a finger against the ground of the rotting tree. He heard the stranger gasp as a small vine pushed out of the ground, one that would have been imperceptible in his home forest but seemed to almost glow in its current dim brown surroundings. “Was…was that you…?” the stranger asked quietly, almost disbelievingly as the grip around Tommy grew slightly tighter. The vine wrapped itself around their ankle. ‘I’m alive. Help me, I’m alive.’ Tommy thought desperately.

Maybe through dumb luck, or telepathy (probably not but hey Tommy lived in a world of magic, he couldn’t be sure ), or a rare act of kindness from the universe, the stranger hooked their arms under Tommy and carried him out of the tree.

“Enderchest!! Over here, girl!” He heard yelled as the wing beats grew louder again. The blurry figure of the bird from earlier came closer and Tommy felt himself be set on the bird’s back as the stranger sat behind him, hoisting his body against him with one arm and grabbing a rope around the bird’s head with the other, flicking it as the bird took off into the sky. The petals on Tommy’s head subconsciously moved to shield his head from the harsh wind as the bird flew up, seemingly knowing exactly where to go. Tommy wasn’t exactly sure what was going on, only seeing the world in a blur of greys blacks and browns until suddenly he saw a blinding light. He felt warm, he felt heat hit his skin and almost immediately started feeling better. The harsh wind slowed as the bird picked a branch to land on above the treetops, still in direct sunlight. Tommy felt himself get lifted and leaned up against the trunk of the tree they were on as the stranger went back to the bird for a second, leaving Tommy to finally have the strength to open his eyes again.

Looking around, he was very high up. There were very few other other branches in the bog trees that could see the light. He felt the tree behind him and tried to put his weight on it so he could stand, but stumbled when his hand didn’t meet the solid wood he was expecting. He turned to see that the entryway was made of strings of wood beads that his hazy vision had mistaken to be part of the rest of the tree, and the inside was hallowed out and seemed oddly cozy and lived in.

“You ok?” He heard, and he quickly whipped around to see the stranger taking something from a small pouch sewn into the saddle of their bird, which Tommy now recognized as a Raven. He was a bit more concerned with the stranger, though.

As they walked back up to him, Tommy finally took notice of the sharp points on their arms, legs, and shoulders. He finally noticed the pointed ears, pointed teeth, almost disproportionate limbs, muted skin and frankly absurd amount of furs and bone jewelry.

He’d been rescued by a boggin.

‘Of course they’re a boggin’, he realized, ‘i’m in boggin territory, if anything would find me it’d be a fuckin boggin.’ Why were they being nice? Was it to make a false sense of security? They’d seemed so genuine when they first found him, but why would they actually want to help him? They’re enemies, boggins murder leafmen for fun, they’re crazy and dangerous, that’s why the Bogs were off limits-

Tommy froze as they came closer and kneeled in front of him, holding out a small canteen and smiling gently, if not somewhat awkwardly. Tommy hesitantly reached out and took it, undoing the cap and smelling it. Water, even still somehow cold and fresh. He momentarily forgot that he was in the presence of the enemy as he greedily drank it down, almost crying from relief as he felt himself grow stronger again but refusing to waste any of his hydration on things as useless as tears. The stranger sat smiling until Tommy hesitantly handed it back. “…thank you.” He mumbled, and the stranger nodded as they walked it back to their bird. “I have more if you want another?” “I’m good, thanks.” Tommy said, trying to remember any lessons Techno had taught him on manners and what he called “basic civil decency.” No one could say Tommy wasn’t raised to be polite (not to say he was, but he was certainly raised to be).

They seemed to be at kind of a standstill, Tommy refusing to start any sort of conversation for fear of potentially insulting someone that could definitely kill him if they wanted, and the stranger just kind of mindlessly fiddling with the straps on their bird to make it seem like they were doing something. Great. God, Tommy hated silence. Apparently, the stranger did, too.

“I’m glad you’re not dead.” They said, still not looking back at Tommy. “…why?” He couldn’t help but ask, immediately regretting it as the stranger turned to stare at him with a look of shock and confusion. “what??” they asked, and Tommy shrunk back on himself. “It’s just…y’know..you know what I am, right? I- I’m not…” “A boggin?” They finished, coming closer again. “Yeah, obviously. You’re from the bright side.” “The bright side?” The boggin nodded. “That’s what we call your side of the forest. You’re a leafman, right? I’ve never met one of you before, or gone to the bright side. And I’m guessing you’d never been to our side, either.” Tommy sighed. “How could you tell?” “I found you on the ground caked in mud. There’s a reason we all either live in the trees or underground; the forest floor here is a deathtrap. You’re lucky you didn’t run into a bobcat or something. Actually, i’m not sure if they’d even be interested in you since you’re a plant and they’re carnivores, so…” they continued on prattling as Tommy made the connection. Ah, so that’s why the forest looked so uninhabited and no one saw him. Everyone just knew to stay off the ground.

“So how did you find me?” Tommy interrupted, and Ranboo laughed. “Dude, everything here is either brown, black, or dead. You stick out like a sore thumb, I could see the green in your leaves from a mile in the air.” Tommy chuckled at that. That must’ve been quite the sight to see; a bright colored random leafman trudging through a dead forest. He might as well have had a giant glowing sign that said ‘I don’t belong here come and kill me!’ The stranger’s face brightened as Tommy laughed, and they took a few more steps towards Tommy before stopping. Tommy looked up at them. They seemed…nervous. Scared? He wasn’t sure, but what the hell, they hadn’t tried to kill him yet. Tommy smiled back at them and scooted over on the branch, patting the spot next to him. The stranger grinned and sat next to him, both of them just sitting in comfortable silence for a minute.

“You know…I was kinda scared to go and help you, as awful as that sounds.” They sighed, and, wow, did that catch Tommy’s attention. “What? Why??” “Cause…I don’t know, I didn’t know if you were hurt or just stopping to rest, and I didn’t want to mess with you if you were ok, cause…” they shrugged, looking away. “But I saw you stop moving entirely and realized you were in trouble, even if I could get hurt I couldn’t leave you to die.” Tommy was only more confused. “‘Cause??’ Cause why?” “Cause you’re a leafman! I mean, you guys kill our kind for no reason. We’re practically mortal enemies!” Tommy paused. He looked the stranger dead in the eyes and saw them shrink back slightly.

Oh, they were being serious. They were actually, genuinely scared of him.

It was quiet for all of two more seconds before Tommy began laughing hysterically, the sudden noise making the stranger flinch back. “Oh..oh my god, man, you’ve gotta be shitting me, that’s…” Tommy laughed, wiping stray tears from his eyes. “You’ll never believe this, but I was thinking the same thing.” He said as he saw their eyes widen. “I came to up here and I thought you might try and push me off the tree cause you’re just homicidal or something, i don’t know.” “Me?? Do I look homicidal?” They asked, a smile tugging at their lips. Tommy grinned. “I don’t know! Do I?” “I mean, I guess not really. You’re not the horror story I was told, you’re too scrawny for that.” Tommy fake scoffed in offense. “Well, I’ll have you know that you aren’t quite the bloodthirsty monster I was told about either.” “This not-so bloodthirsty monster has a name, y’know.” They smirked.

”Noooo,” Tommy drawled out sarcastically. “I thought that names were just a leafmen thing.” He finished before smiling and sticking a hand out. “Tommy. Sorry I didn’t introduce myself earlier, as you’ve probably realized by now, manners aren’t really my thing. That, and I thought I was going to fucking die so it wasn’t really the first thing on my mind.” His hopefully-new-friend chuckled, grabbing it and shaking gently, given that Tommy’s whole hand could fit in their palm twice over. “Ranboo. I’m glad I got to meet you before you succumbed to your lack of sunlight or…whatever happened to you, you’re fun. I don’t..uh….I don’t have many friends.”

“Well, then, I guess that just means I don’t have competition in becoming your best friend.” Tommy said with a tone of finality, standing and reaching a hand down to the boggin, who took it, wide eyes staring up at Tommy. “You mean it?” they said, the hope eminent in their voice. “I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t, bossman. Plus, I, uh…don’t have many friends myself.” “Ah, I couldn’t possibly see why, you’re just so charming.” Ranboo responded sarcastically, and Tommy could barely pretend to be offended past the smile plastered on his face. Finally, someone who understood his sense on humor. “Bitch, I will have you know that I am an absolute pleasure t-“ Ranboo interrupted him by pulling him into a hug, one Tommy had no problem reciprocating. Eventually, they pulled away, eyes glassy with what Tommy hoped were tears of joy. He kinda wanted to make a joke about it, but he was ninety percent sure he looked the same, so he really wasn’t one to talk. “Thanks, that..that means a lot to me. But you probably wanna go home.” Ranboo finished as he called over his raven, who perched closer and leaned down so Ranboo could get on.

Tommy sighed. “Yeah, my dads probably already got a search party or six out looking for me, but I’ll be fine. Besides, I can’t leave without knowing where to see you again! You think you can meet me at the north bog border sundown tomorrow?” Ranboo smiled, sharp teeth on full display but no longer threatening. “Sounds perfect.” They said, holding a hand out to Tommy as they helped him climb on the bird. “So, tell me about the bright side? I only get glimpses of sun when I come up to my nook here.” Ranboo jerked his head to the beaded entrance of the tree. “I’ve always wanted to go over there, but I’m a little afraid of getting attacked. I wanna know everything.” “Oh, buckle in, my friend,” Tommy said, laughing and gripping the rope in front of him, “it’s a long way back home and I have a lot to complain about-“

~~~

“…So you have to make sure to be on your absolute best behavior. Stay right by my side, don’t-“ “‘Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.’ Right, got it, old man.” Tommy replied to his father in a mocking sarcastic voice. Phil glared at him before looking back up to Techno, who nodded without even looking back. They’d done this whole charade plenty of times; Tommy ignored his dad and Techno was left to make sure he didnt hurt himself. Honestly, Phil used him as more of a babysitter than the actual trained guard he was. Tommy actually felt a little bad for him.

They continued their way through the bogs on a higher path through the underground tunnels since apparently Phil knew the “don’t walk on the forest ground” rules. Lucky bitch. Unluckily for Tommy, they were there on some official royal business shit. Something about knowing how to handle “those freaks” (as his father had put it) once he became king.

“I mean it, Tommy. This is important. We want to keep our people safe from these creatures, but they need to see that fucking with us is a bad idea. If they think we’re weak, we’ll all be killed. All these monsters want is the death of our world, do you want that?” Tommy sighed. Jeez, could his father be any more dramatic? Every word out of his mouth was harder and harder to believe by the day now that he knew Ranboo. The two of them hung out constantly, usually at the treetop nook since it was concealed well, and Ranboo was nothing like what his dad had said. And Ranboo assured Tommy that he was nothing like he had been taught, either. Still, though, Tommy had to keep up his mask. “No, I don’t want that.” He mumbled, facing down. “But maybe calling them ‘creatures’ and ‘monsters’ in their own turf isn’t the greatest idea, either.”

“Ah, so that’s what you call us behind our backs, then, is it?” He heard a voice call out from the opened area of the tunnel in front of him. He saw his father stiffen and his face harden, the same expression he wore for every meeting and decision he made. Tommy was pushed back by Techno, who used himself as a shield between him and the newcomer.

They were clearly a boggin, tall yet slightly shorter than Ranboo, but the small spikes Ranboo had were nothing compared to the quills that lined their limbs. Their skin, what little they could see of it under a scaly cloak made of snake skin and the leather armor under it, was a desaturated grey-ish green. Their face was covered in a similar armor-like plate on the lower half with bones sewn into it in a curve reminiscent of a smile, and the cloak had a hood that fell over his head; the head of the snake with the jaw still intact, lining the top of his head and their collarbone with dagger like fangs. Above the mask, Tommy could see the remnants of a massive scar that gashed through the left side of their face down through the right, though it clearly continued behind the mask. This, this was their king. This was the guy his dad and Techno had warned him about, this was the bloodthirsty ruler of the Bogs. This was Dream.

They looked absolutely horrifying, but surprised Tommy when their eyes quirked up in what had to be a smile and they simply bowed to his father. “King Philza, your majesty.” Which immediately struck him as odd, but he assumed it was a royalty thing. He went to return the gesture and bow, but was elbowed harshly in the chest by his father. Phil glared at him momentarily before turning back to Dream. “…let’s just get this over with.” He said before walking past him and into the open area.

“…Techno! You seem to be doing well!” Dream said awkwardly as Techno went to follow Phil past the boggin. “And you still look decrepit. That scar still giving you a hard time, or does it look any better under that mask?” “Well sorry that not all of us grow back when they’re cut down.” Dream replied coldly. Techno simply shrugged and motioned for Tommy to walk past as well.

“Ah, you’re new! What’s your name?” Dream asked, and Tommy stopped. He…honestly felt bad. This guy was trying to be a good host, and his dad and Techno were being dicks to him. Godammit they were in his house! Weren’t there, like, hospitality rules or some shit? If someone walked into his home talking like that, Phil would have kicked them out before they even got in! Fucking hypocrite. Couldn’t they at least try to be a little nicer than normal? “I’m-“ “None of your concern, boggin.” Techno interrupted, coming back to grab Tommy by the wrist and drag him away. Oh, fuck this, Tommy had had enough.

He pulled away harshly from Techno’s hand and held it out to Dream. “I’m Tommy, the prince, Phil’s son. It’s a pleasure to meet you, sir.” Tommy watched Dream’s eyes widen in shock, but he felt eyes burning into the back of his head. He glanced back and, oh god, if looks could kill, Tommy would be a dead man. Phil looked absolutely murderous, and even slightly horrified at Tommy’s normal display of courtesy. Honest to god, it was just a handshake! What’s the worst that could-

It was only then that he remembered one crucial detail about the royal boggin family: just as the royal leafmen could control the life in the forest, the boggins could control death, and with that, rot. Any simple contact could kill anything, and more importantly for this particular matter, him.

Ok, maybe Tommy fucked up a little.

But to his surprise, Dream gingerly took his hand and shook it (he ignored how he heard Techno’s breath catch), eyes bright with joy. “Please, no need for the formalities, just call me Dream, kid.” He said, letting go of Tommy’s hand, and he couldn’t help but smile that Dream seemed to like him. “Let me guess, here on royal bullshit? Gotta learn how to negotiate and stuff?” Tommy nodded, “It’ll be my job someday, better learn how to get good at it now.” “Well, I like the confidence! How old even are you?” “Uh, I just turned 17.” “No way! I have a younger sibling that’s your age! I’ve only been in power for about a decade, so they’ve still got some time before they’re crowned since i’m not an old bat just yet,” Dream paused only briefly and Tommy fought the urge to laugh out loud at Phil’s offended gasp, “but you should totally meet them! Hold on, I’ll run and grab him!”

Dream held a finger up as he ran to a different section of the tunnels, and Tommy could only hope that he’d be back soon since Phil was glaring daggers at him and Techo’s head was just in his hands. Yeah, this would be a fun talk when he got home. Thankfully, Dream stepped into the room only slightly panting from his apparent sprint through his tunnels, the figure behind him shrouded in darkness from the section of the tunnel Dream had come from.

“Alrighty, King Philza, Tommy…” his eyes stalled at Techno, “bitch,” he continued before Techno had any time to interrupt, “I’d like you all to meet my little brother and our prince…”

The figure stepped into the light and Tommy made eye contact with them, freezing immediately, recognizing them. How could he not, they had been hanging out together in secret for months! They were his best friend! They were barely out of the tunnel before they froze as well, eyes locked onto Tommy, clearly recognizing him, as well.

Oh shit.

“…Ranboo!”

Not a move was made as they both tried to process what they were seeing. Ranboo had never told him they were a prince! To be fair though, Tommy hadn’t brought it up much, either. He hadn’t wanted Ranboo to treat him differently since he was royalty, but they probably felt the same way.

They were fucked, weren’t they?

[crimson-host]

Back again with my third one-shot, yesh, finally, thanks to a good awesome bestie friend of mine I have some encouragement to beat my procrastination with, off to my shitty story

------------------------------

---------Kuo Kuana--------

Ghira sat in his office, setting a sheet of paper on a pile of other papers, taking off his reading glasses he sighed and stretched "another day of paper work done" bring a big hand up to his neck as he popped it a little "wonder what Kali has planned for dinner" standing up he walked out of his office and down the hallway eager to see his wife when he stopped catching someone at the corner of his eye, turning to the backyard he saw a man curled up into a ball of bright vibrant yellow fur, letting out a bellowing chuckle he walked over to the man

"Jaune!" the ball of fur moved revealing it was a large fluffy blond dog tail, lifting his head revealed Jaune Arc, with two floppy dog ears having two traits thanks to his family's abnormally strong faunus roots, Jaune looked to the giant of a man and his eyes lit up "UNCLE!" within a instant Jaune jumped from his curled up position into Ghira's chest hugging the man, earning a happy playful laugh from Ghira as he hugged the boy back "glad to see you came to visit today" resting a hand on Jaune's head softly petting him

Jaune's tail began wagging like crazy, he always loved getting pats on the head, some Faunus saw it as degrading but to Jaune, his dad, half of his sister's, they were just signs of affection, like hugs, kissing, etc. and he always loved getting those, of course he only lets his family pet him but hey, the Belladonnas were family to him no matter what blood said, he looked up to Ghira "It was getting a bit noisy back at home so I figured I'd sunbath and snooze here" Ghira laughed a little more "That's quite alright, as my wife tells you time and time again, you are always welcomed here, now would you like to join us for dinner?" Jaune smiled brighter than the sun, for being a shy boy in public but with friends and family he was a warm fireplace "sure!, I love Auntie's cooking" then he half whispered "don't tell mom but Auntie's a little bit better cook" Ghira could only smile softly as his fatigue slowly faded and he began walking to his living room with Jaune wrapped on him like a newborn sloth

Kali was setting the dinner table, mainly fish, tho faunus aren't as animalistic as many believe, their preferences for food is slightly influenced, herbivore faunus for example prefer fruits, vegetables, and other greens but can still eat meats, they simply prefer plants more, in her family's case, fish were their preferences, they can eat anything like any other person but when picking meats fishes is where they prefer, her feline ears twitched hearing heavy footsteps sooner than most, her beloved was coming just in time, she stood up, brushed herself off she turned opened a door to meet her husband halfway and-she gasped "Jauncy!" she rushed over and hugged Jaune who jumped off Ghira and hugged each other "How's my little nephew?!" Ghira chucked knowing Jaune was here just two days ago but to Kali she doted on Jaune so much it was like mother and son, much to their dear friend Josephine Arc chagrin "hello dear, Jaune will be joining us for dinner" Kali squealed at this "Wonderful!, we have fish, some salads, some beef, soups, oh I hope our little kitten can make it oh it will be just wonderful!"

Jaune spoke up "Um, I think she's out with Adam" this...quickly brought down the mood some, Ghira and Kali had....mixed feelings on Adam, he was a rather...strong headed and firey boy, but thanks to Josephine's influence he has simmered somewhat, little less extreme than some of the radicals that has infested their old organization but that has been some worries on their minds, Josephine Arc was a human, one of the handful of humans on Menagerie, her and half her daughters, the other half and Jaune we're Faunus from her Husband's side of the family, when the news came out that Julius of the great family, who fought the hardest and with the most heart back during the war who saved hundreds and hundreds of Faunus like guardian heroes, married a human it was...a shock to many, to Ghira and Kali they were overjoyed their dear friend Julius finally someone his special someone, and when they asked if they minded if Josephine wasn't a faunus all he said about it was "My family fought to protect everyone not just the Faunus, she could be a Schnee and I'd still fall to one knee asking for her hand in marriage" and with that the case was closed for the more accepting of the Faunus, seeing this as a great thing, a sign of cooperation was possible but unfortunately some of the more...extreme and bitter elements were furious saying Julius was betraying the Arc family legacy, at first they were mocked and ridiculed but as time went on this small minority grew and grew, saying Julius should divorce Josephine and remarry a faunus woman to 'restore his family bloodline's purify' his family bloodline but no one dared raise a hand against Josephine or her children out of fear of Julius Arc, he was a family man first and foremost, any harm to his family would incur the wraith of monster that would put fear into even Grimm, thankfully Josephine has been a positive influence on Menagerie for the most part, being kind, sweet, and empathetic to everyone, never judging anyone no matter their past deeds or appearance, a embarrassing nickname is Josephine the Saintess which embarrasses Josephine to no end, due to this the White Fang under Sienna has struggled with recruiting, yes the vial treatment under Atlas and the Schnee Dust Company helped recruitment efforts but when some of the radical elements preach about Faunus supremacy than that Humans should be the ones cowering in fear at their mercy it causes many that knows Josephine to imagine her branded by the Schnee Dust Company, slaving away in the Dust Mines, bruised and beaten, causing all to turn turn away and hesitant for such extreme, as for Sienna's opinion, Kali asked her and was shocked how angry she got "Anyone that would bite at Josephine is the reason why so many of us are in chained, we should be feared but not devolve into monsters" was her exact words, Kali disagreed with her little tiger's belief the Faunus and White Fang should be feared but grateful even she was drawing a line in the sand at senseless violence, especially the undeserving

"W-well if she makes it back in time she can join us for dinner" Kali would have to accept for now that her little kitten is love with Adam, and the three entered the dinning room and began to enjoy their dinner leaving a bit for Blake whenever she arrived..unfortunately she only arrived after Dinner was finished

----------Midnight---------

Suddenly the night sky was lit up as a section of the Arc household blew up and caught fire, many began to panic and freak out, Ghira and Kali quickly being called and informed of what transpired, Ghira rushing to the residential district with some guards seeing the pillar of smoke in the distance, he rapidly sped up in the charge and his guards tried to keep up, eventually he arrived to see Josephine getting medical treatment for first degree burn in her back, and Octavia Arc, the second oldest, ordering people around organizing people to help fight the fire and to prevent further fire damage, he walked over to Octavia "Octavia!" he called our getting her attention as her tail flicked, she turned to Ghira with a snarl for a second before freezing and looking ashamed "U-Uncle Ghira!" he was surprised by the snarl a little but considering the circumstances he couldn't blame the girl "What happened? is anyone else hurt?" Octavia took a took breath "no, Azure was almost but mom protected her, she took the most of it, I think someone planted a bomb" this caused Ghira blood to run cold "H-how come?" Octavia answer only solidified his fear "when mom opened her bedroom door me, Bleu, and Coral heard the ticking of a timer all of sudden, Azure went to investigate and..." Ghira only had one guess, some of the radicals finally decided to try and remove Josephine from the picture, he looked to the fire and people actively fighting it and keeping it from spreading "Your father should be arriving tomorrow, he..." he let out a heavy sigh "I'll try and keep him from doing anything stupid, your mother will be put under guard back at the mansion, you and your sisters can sleep with us for the time being" Octavia spoke up "Wh-where's Jaune by chance?" Ghira answered to relieve her fear "back at my mansion, he ate with us and Kali gave him a room to sleep in, he's safe" Octavia let out a sigh of relief "oh thank the brothers" Ghira began helping with the firefighting effort like the girls and their mother was escorted to the mansion, Ghira could only hope he can hold his friend back from causing a bloodbath

--------The Next Day------

The talk with Julius went about as well as expected "Do not try and talk me Ghira, I'll make them pay for what they tried to good" Julius was currently with a grapple hold with Ghira "P-Please Julius think for a moment!" "I am thinking!, Thinking how I will tear all of them limb from fucking limb!" "But you don't know who were involved and who wasn't!" Julius and Ghira struggled against one another for a bit before Julius relented "Fine!, we'll talk with Sienna, but if I suspect she's holding out in us I won't hesitate to kill her" Julius stared at Ghira, normally he wasn't this vicious but when those precious to him were involved he wasn't afraid to become a monster "Of course, I have a dozen guards stationed and Josephine is receiving the best care possible, she'll recover and be safe" Julius took slowly and deep breaths then sighed "thank you.." Ghira shook it hand and gave Julius shoulder a firm squeeze "It's alright, I'd feel the same if Kali was attacked, we'll sort this out and bring those response to justice" and thus Julius and Ghira marched to the White Fang's base, ready to demand answer

-------White Fang HQ-----

Sienna was seething, practically boiling with rage, news of the explosion and fire at the Arc Household as quickly spread and testimony that the kids with strong hearing heard ticking only further rumors that it was a planned assassination attempted, one that seemed less rumor by the minute, before her was Albain brothers, she hated them, too conniving for her like, but she was glad they weren't involved, as they said "What purpose would Josephine's death serve besides turn all of Menagerie against the Fang?" morbid...but true, Josephine might have made recruitment more difficult but she never mistreated Faunus, to her everyone was equal and that we should all work together against the Grimm, this sentiment she could agree with, of course naive but one to work towards, one Atlas and Schnee Dust Company learned their lessons then people could move on to equality but for now this was the order of things "Our first priority is finding the ones that organized this attack, the damned fools costed us the Arc Family's trust, and Ilia's loyalty" Ilia, previously Amitola, now Arc, was adopted into the Arc family after her parents died in a dust mine collapse, her hatred of humans was...tempered with Josephine and her daughters, causing her hatred to be more...focused on specific humans, mainly the Schnees and people from Atlas, which made convincing her to join the cause easier, this drove a slight wedge between her and her adopted family, but after this, likely she will leave the Fang unless Blake, her obvious crush, begged her to stay "That is quite unfortunate, angering a Arc promises eternal grudge" Fennec stated, followed up by his brother "Best we can do is publicly denounced this attack and find whoever responsible and hand them off as a offering the patriarch of the Arc Family" a cruel smile spread across Sienna's face "And a sacrifice they will get when I find them" suddenly the doors of the throne room opened to reveal a guard "High Leader!" Sienna glared "What is it?" the guard wilted under the glare "G-Ghira Belladonna and Julius Arc has arrived demanding a audience with you" Sienna clicked her tongue "Send them in!" she then motioned for the Albain brothers to stand to the side which they do, and soon comes in Ghira and a angry Julius "Mr. Belladonna and Arc, what do I owe the pleasure?" Ghira was the one to speak to make sure Julius didn't say anything too..intense "We have come to ask if the White Fang had any involvement with the attack on the Arc Family" straight to the point, Sienna sighed "I did not order such a attack, nor have the Albain brothers, if someone ordered such a thing then it would have to be one of the warhawks or radicals with intense hatred for human, we will be investigating everyone and be searching for the culprit"

Julius fist tightened, he was enraged it was a member of the White Fang, something his family helped started and supported personally when Ghira was in charged...but he was relieved to know Sienna had no involved, from her smell and tone, she seemed genuine, he let out a heavy sigh "if that's the case, as of this moment, the Arc family shall be a resident of Menagerie no more" everyone present froze at this declaration "Julius, are you sure?" Julius turned to Ghira "yes, if my family are gonna be under constant danger of madmen and assassins, then I can't stay here anymore" the Albain brothers were shocked, this would be...a book to recruitment but also...a hit to moral if the heroic family were to turn their back on Menagerie, unless they could spin it, Sienna kept a stoic expression, she couldn't blame Julius, at one point she saw him as a father figure, and currently he had to choose between the Faunus and his family...and he chose his family, she can't blame nor fault him for that, Ghira sighed "alright, you can leave when Josephine is fully recovered, give you time for you and your kids to pack" Julius nodded "tho, where will you be headed?" Julius shot a look to Sienna and Albains "wherever you choose I'll send out the order to all sects to avoid" Sienna spoke, it would hurt the cause but...she owed Julius this at least, Julius turned to Sienna and his anger...relaxed, with a small thankful nod he turned to Ghira "Vale, maybe I can asked the Headmaster if I could get a job at Beacon, help train more Huntsmen" Ghira took a deep breath and nodded, Sienna turned to the Albain brothers "have the message be sent out that all White Fang are to avoid Vale, anyone that tries to operate in Vale will be excommunicated and shunned" the Albain brothers didn't like this but...better this than getting on the Arc eternal hatred, so they bow and leave, Julius turned to Sienna "thanks" Sienna remained quiet and turned away, a small blush on her cheeks, with that the two men leave to inform the others

------------------------------

Aaaaand that ends my third story, I may continue one of them but for now this is good

[riverkloss]

My entry for @deans-ch-ch-cherrypie for her 500 challenge! My twist on Hansel and Gretel! Plus I made a moodboard which is super nice if I say so myself. ❤

●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●

I hated the dress, it was pretty but the way it hung on my body, the color, for what it stood for.

Purity, Marriage, to be chained down to a man, one I didn't love.

Harold's mother Mary was fixating on my hair, near pulling it out at the roots, I fought back the winces, at one point I thought about turning around and grabbing her hair to yank it out of her scalp.

She was tall, thin, she reminded me of a spider, her dark hair pulled into a bun, neat and tightly. A dark dress as if she was in mourning, I was.

She was acting as if I was her porcelain doll to dress up, one without a mind.

The reflection was haunting me, this girl staring back at me. Blank eyes, a trembling lip. It didn't look like me, she looked like a stranger, she looked lost.

Mary yanked again at my roots while braiding my hair, a burning pain running alongside my scalp, I hissed in pain. "Stop moving." She scolded me as if I was a child, I huffed out a breath of anger.

Hero's head perked up watching carefully with those big brown eyes of his, alerted and waiting. He was a very intimidating looking dog, but a big baby to me. He was a mutt, half sure he was a German Shepherd, and a Husky, his eyes always on me watching everything I did.

The last of his litter, the runt. Once I got him he grew and grew, he seemed to get bigger everyday.

My best and only friend.

"Is that what you have packed?" Her voice had a distasteful tone. I turned my head to follow her gaze on my trunk, a box full of books neatly stacked on top.

"Yes, May I ask why?"

I looked at her confused, I shifted the front of my body towards her, relieved that my hair was free of the clutches of her fingers.

"You won't be needing all those books, you won't have time to read once you have children." Her eyes look for an imperfection in my face, ready to fix it.

A sickening feeling turns my stomach. I will have to lie in bed with him, have his children.

The thought makes me ill.

"We need the money." The sentence my mother told me runs in my head.

"You should feel grateful for marrying my son." She states, her lip almost upturning in a snarl.

I want to tell her that her son is a pig, a ugly little repulsive pig with his head up her ass, the words die in my throat, I felt incapacitated by my own words, my mind, constantly double thinking over myself.

"Tell your husband that my dog likes to sit in the front seat." It felt good to push back even the slightest at her.

"Didn't your mother tell you? The mutt isn't coming with you, Harold has never been fond of dogs or any pets, dirty things." Those words pushed me back more, I actually let out a laugh in disbelief.

"I've seen dirtier." I smirked at her, I watched her open her mouth to say something as her face switched to spite.

"Mary? The guests are arriving." I hear her husband call out from behind the closed door.

Her hateful gaze doesn't intimidate me.

If anything it fuels me more.

"You best pray to God before the ceremony." Is all she says before she leaves me alone.

I bite back the untasteful words to tell her to shove God up her ass.

I turn my body towards my mirror once again, laying my palms flat on my vanity, so many emotions running through me.

Alone.

There was no stirring through the house, everyone was outside in the front of the house, my chance was open, and I was a fool if I stayed, lived in misery.

I was a fool to take it too, but a free fool was better than one who had none and was still a fool at the end of the day.

I needed a sign. A sign from any of the gods, I pleaded to any of them who would listen.

Then I heard the chime of bells, from the windchime against my window. There it was.

The last gaze I had in the mirror, at the girl who had the glint of a spark in her stormy eyes, a soft smile on her lips.

I darted for my carry bag, shifting my books off my trunk and stuffing clothes in, the few dollars I had, along with the few books I could take, feeling a loss for the others I had to leave behind.

"Let's go, Hero." I waved my hand, he sprinted up quickly to follow behind me, as I moved through the house quickly and quietly, to the kitchen. I opened the back door, the warmth of the spring air hitting me, as I stepped out the door. Hero was at my side as I closed the door behind me.

I turned my head, and my Uncle was leaning against the house smoking a cigarette, he looked at me, panic ran through my body.

And as I thought my freedom was vanishing through my fingers.

"Keep to the trail." He nodded to the woods, he took a deep inhale of his cigarette.

A breath of relief escaped my chest.

"Thank you."

He waved a hand. "See you later, Kid."

I smiled softly. "See you later."

I knew there wasn't a later, but it was better that way than saying goodbye.

The woods were only steps away, and I ran for life, for freedom.

I was a free fool.

~~~

Dark clouds came overhead, the night rolling in as the sun went down, the birds quieting.

My legs were heavy and burning, and Hero kept at my side, patiently.

"Are you lost?" A smoky voice says, making me jump with a gasp, my heart felt like it was going to pop from my chest.

I turned my body towards the trees. A tall man stepped out of the tree line, but didn't step on the trail, his hair was dark, braided and shaved at the sides, scuff lining his boyish features. I noticed a small birthmark on his cheek near his nose. He looked familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. He was quite handsome.

"No, I'm not lost." I stated confidently. Hero didn't react to him, which was odd because Hero didn't like strangers. It made me slightly uneasy.

He perked up a dark brow at me, a charming smirk.

"Are you sure?" He was looking at my dress, his smirk getting slightly bigger.

"I would think you would be at a wedding."

I held onto my bag tightly, ready to strike first if it came that way.

"You should know that they are waiting for you at the end of the trail, they thought they would let you walk to defeat." He turns his head briefly to look down.

My face morphs in surprise for a moment, but it's something that my mother would do. That I believe.

"Why are you telling me?"

He bite his tongue with his sharpest canines.

"You're pretty."

I scoffed. I knew what I looked like, yes I was pretty, but men didn't want wives that outweighed them, or intimidated them.

Weak men.

"I know a way off the trail, one you won't get caught."

I pressed my lips together.

"How can I trust you when I don't know you, you're a stranger in my eyes.

"My name is Hvitserk, now we aren't strangers." He smiled at me.

He outstretched his hand for me to take, but I was still weary of him.

"If you try anything Hvitserk, I will let my dog tear you apart." I stated.

I reached for his hand, and he helped me step from the trail into the treeline, Hero followed and began walking in front of us.

"I'm curious, why did you run away, was the husband-to-be grotesque?" He is toying with something in his pocket and pulls out a few wild berries, he pops one into his mouth.

I laughed at that. "I don't want to be held down in a loveless, freedomless marriage, I want more."

He nods, listening to every word, while popping berries into his mouth.

"My father is pushing us boys to find wives, he is more in the old ways about it, stealing a woman and taking her to the underworld." I laugh a little at the underworld part.

"Like Hades and Persephone?"

He raises his eyebrows at me.

"You know that story?"

"I've always liked that story, My parents hated when I read books like that, they thought it would tamper with my mind." I whirl my finger around my temple.

"He stole her away, but they actually loved each other, he treated her with equality and respected her, never cheated on her, or had stray eyes for another, he would destroy the world if she asked." I continued.

He held out his hand to offer me a red berry and plucked one with my finger. I put the berry in my mouth, it was so sweet and ripe against my tongue, almost a cinnamon hint to it.

"If you asked me, I would too."

I playfully rolled my eyes, taking another berry, then another.

"Though my Mother doesn't want to admit it, I think she went willingly as well."

"Oh?" I peer at Hero who is still walking ahead. I paid little attention to what he said, but I should have.

"She ate the berries my Father offered to her, and she became tied to the underworld."

I stare at him like he's grown two heads.

And my gaze goes to the berry in my fingers,

Red and plump, I feel drunk all of a sudden and light like I am floating.

He curls himself around me, and I gasp.

"I think Cerberus will be glad to see his son again." He chimes.

He holds onto my full hip with a heavy grasp.

"I'm sure you'll give me sons too." His gaze darkens on me, he leans down to my lips and my heart feels heavy.

He presses his lips to mine, and I'm engulfed in hellfire.

Maybe being in the Underworld won't be so bad.

[tv-music]

Umbrella Academy Review 1.07

The Day That Was

We begin this episode with the story of Harold Jenkins, born on the same day as the Umbrella Academy kids, his mother died in childbirth leaving his father an alcoholic mess who takes his problems out on his son using his fist. Harold is a big fan of the academy and is convinced that as he shares their birthday he may be one of the 43. Dressed in his homemade uniform he tries to join the academy only to be told by Reginald that there is nothing special about him. When he returns home he is hit by his father and finally snaps, rather than get the beer his father asks for, he grabs a hammer and puts an end to his Dad’s abuse once and for all. He gets 12 years for the crime, and just 5 days earlier, the day we meet the siblings no less, he watched Klaus throw away dear old Reginalds diary and collect it himself. As he does this we get to see Harold's adult face for the first time, and to the surprise of absolutely no one, it’s Leonard. This brings us nicely back to where we left off in the last episode, with Leonard (I know his names Harold but for the sake of simplicity I’ll keep referring to him as Leonard) in the house taking one of the figurines but this time, as he overhears the rest of the family meeting take place, we see the first change caused by Five’s appearance, he realises they know his real name, even if they don’t actually know it’s him. 

The siblings continue their meeting, and Five convinces them that they need to work together to figure out who Harold is and he, Diego and Alison investigate. They go to the police station in order to get Harold’s file, when Diego is informed he’s a suspect in his ex’s death - no real surprise there. When Diego gets the file, Alison immediately recognises Leonard and informs her brothers who he is. I’m glad that it wasn't dragged out and the 3 of them head over to Leonard’s house to investigate. It doesn’t take long for them to find his weird shrine but when they do Five collapses and they realise he was seriously injured. They take him home and while their Mum is caring for him, Diego mentions theres another address they can check, unfortunately as he and Alison leave the house, Diego is arrested for his ex’s death so Alison heads out alone

Luther is still convinced that this has something to do with his time on the moon and once again deals with the discovery that there was no real mission. With no Alison to comfort him this time and no Diego to tie up Klaus, Luther and Klaus are left with each other. We’ve not really seen much interaction between these two characters so this was interesting to watch. This was the first time I felt any real sympathy towards Luther, when he literally started crying on Klaus’s shoulder I felt genuinely sad. I was also surprised by the turn this episode took with these two characters, Luther looking to feel numb and forget the way Klaus does and Klaus having to be the responsible one, a role reversal that didn’t feel forced or for laughs but just two people both going through something difficult, Klaus grieving for Dave and Luther realising who his father really was. 

Luther’s gone to the club and Klaus is following reluctantly, being led by Ben, to try to stop him. Klaus understandably doesn’t want to go in, but Ben makes it clear that Luther would do it if it were the other way round, no questions asked. I understand Klaus’s reluctance, he’s trying to get clean and a place like that is going to be really difficult for a newly sober person to be. While in the club, Klaus, already struggling with his addiction, started having flashbacks as part of his PTSD - give the poor guy a break. Klaus sees Luther in trouble and tries to help, almost getting himself killed in the process (or was he actually dead for the duration? I’m not sure if that was how it was intended) Klaus enters what we can only assume is the afterlife and while there he finally gets to speak with his Dad and gets some answers. Reginald wastes no time in expressing how disappointed he is in his son, while taking no responsibility for the damage he’s caused. He did reveal the answers to the mystery surrounding his death - he killed himself to bring them back together in order to save the world -  did he never think of just treating them better and speaking to them? Of course, in true tv fashion, Klaus returns to the land of the living just as his Dad is about to tell him something important

Leonard, realising that the Hargreeve siblings know his real name and it’s only a matter of time before they find him and reveal all to Vanya, takes her out of the city and to a remote cabin in the woods - it’s like Vanya’s never seen a horror movie before. 

It’s dark, they’re alone at a creepy lake and Leonard is more than a little insistent on Vanya tapping into her power - at this point I’m screaming at Vanya to see the red flags here, why isn’t she getting warning signs from how insistent he is on her having a power and figuring out how to use it while isolating her from her family? I know she’s had a tough life but come on. He takes her to dinner and when they get back to the car, there's a group of men there ready to start a fight over absolutely nothing. In Vanya’s desperate attempt to help Leonard, she inadvertently uses her powers and causes what looks like an awful lot of damage to the attackers. I find it hard to believe that this was a coincidence, she was struggling to tap into her powers and he knows they’re rooted in her emotions, Leonard hired them, I’m sure of it. When Vanya is allowed in to see Leonard at the hospital he’s wearing an eye patch - it was his eye Five found

There’s no real changes to Hazel and Cha Cha’s  day which is unsurprising but it was interesting to see it from Hazel’s point of view. Instead we see the aftermath to Hazel knocking out Cha Cha, Hazel tells her he’s leaving and he hopes she can respect that, but Cha Cha makes it clear that she can’t stating that if Hazel doesn’t kill her she will kill him and Agnes - why is she so bothered by him moving on in his life, I never got any romantic vibes from them and no ones that bothered by a coworker or friend changing paths

Diego’s in prison, Five’s injured at home, Klaus is still sober and has some answers from their father he surely needs to share, Luther is high/drunk and continuing his party, Vanya is at the hospital with a newly eyeless Leonard and Alison is on her way to find her - the episode ends with the siblings all in very different places, in more ways than one - they all need to come together and fast if they have any chance of stopping the impending apocalypse

Extra Thoughts

I grow more and more fond of Diego every episode, him jumping through a glass window, when both Alison and Five had already found ways into the house and could have let him in had me laughing. The fact that the door was unlocked just made it better

Everything in the afterlife being black and white other than Klaus’s shirt was genius, but it was heartbreaking to see Klaus thinking he was going to see Dave but getting his Dad instead

I hope the story line with Diego being arrested goes away fast - it wasn’t surprising but was just unnecessary seemingly only there to separate the siblings 

[lochsides]

You Signed Up For This Review

If you're following me, you really did sign up for this review. I love that the title of this album lends itself to so many puns. Maybe that was the second indication that I would adore this album (the first being that its a Maisie Peters album). God, where do I even begin to review the pop mastery that is YSUFT? The album is both cohesive and chaotic in the best way possible. Maisie is one of those songwriters who approaches writing with quick wit and personality. That’s my biggest takeaway from this album. YSUFT has so much personality. It is very authentic while being refreshing. I’m so glad it finally here, to be consumed in all its glory. She really hit it out of the park and it was well worth the wait. There is not a single skip.

For those of you interested, below the cut you will find a review for each song. My favourites are 'I'm Trying (Not Friends)', ‘Love Him, I Don’t’, ‘Hollow’, ‘Villain’, ‘Brooklyn’, ‘Elvis Song’ and ‘Volcano’ — yes I know that’s half the album. This is my review and I make the rules. I've also included a little ranking at the very end.

You Signed Up For This — This song has so much main character energy. My favourite thing about Maisie as a songwriter is that her songwriting has a sense of humour to it. This song says so much in 3 minutes and 15 seconds. Its the perfect album opener, particularly for a debut album, but it's also a really good introduction to Maisie Peters for new listeners and old fans alike.

I'm Trying (Not Friends) — I can't decide what my favourite part of this song is: her sharp, witty songwriting or the cadence. This is what I mean when I say that the album is authentic while being refreshing. The cadence is unlike anything I’ve heard before, especially from Maisie, but the passive- aggressive lyrics are so Maisie. She has always had this unvarnished honesty to her songwriting that I really appreciate about her.

John Hughes Movie — Pop perfection! That's it, that's the review. I love the message of this song. It has a sense of self-worth and confidence despite being let down. And when I tell you I adore the fuck out of the bridge of 'JHM', it's an understatement. It was actually the perfect lead single for an album with so much main character energy.

Outdoor Pool — 'Outdoor Pool' is basically Fifteen (Maisie’s Version), when all you wanted was to be wanted. She really captured that in this song. I felt so sad listening to it because 15 really is such a delicate age. The music and production felt very cinematic to me and that really brought to life this story that she was telling. It really is almost Skins. I have so much affection for this song in like a big sister way.

Love Him, I Don't — Ooft, this song hurt my feelings. The production at the start with her ‘ooh’s was already chilling but then she hit me with ‘I wasn’t eating and you still said nothing’ and ‘guess that was my stubborn season’ and took me out. ‘Love Him, I Don’t’ is a song about toxicity and I’ve been there. I have friends who have been there. The lyric ‘what a waste of your twenties’ reminded me of a relationship my best friend was in. There are so many little details in this song that make it so relatable in a way the hurts. I love the melody of the pre-chorus and chorus, and then she goes and strips it back in the last verse. The whole song is a 5-star experience. It's so raw and the emotion in her vocal takes it to another level.

Psycho — Maisie Peters said feral girl summer and make it catchy. There are two bridges in this song. That should be enough to sell me, but she had to go and write ‘you made me feel so useful then so used.’ All in all though, ‘Psycho’ is probably my least favourite and that’s only because there are so many good songs on this album that outrank this.

Boy — I’m joining Maisie Peters’ fight to take away men’s rights because valid. It’s funny because I can hear Ed Sheeran’s writing in this song, mostly in the production. I love the tone throughout this song, but specifically when she says 'I can tell that you've never been hugged, boy.' It's sassy as fuck and I love that for her. My favourite aspect of 'Boy' is that the catchiest part, the one that is most likely to get stuck in our heads. is 'I can do better than this' and that feels very intentional, like a little message from Maisie reminding us that we can do better than The Boy ™️.

Hollow — 'Hollow' is such a good heartbreak ballad. It has all the makings of a great classic pop ballad, from the piano to the production to the poetic lyrics. Was it fair of her to put the lyrics 'now I'm a comma in your explanation of your learning curves and your mistakes' in the same song, in the same verse, as 'you're the one that got away and you got away with a lot' and then follow it up with a bridge of memories and 'I just miss my friend'? Let's discuss. I think the reason I, personally, love this song so much is the lyrical links to other songs like 'Villain' ('now you're kissing that girl I shouldn't worry about'), 'Volcano' ('you got away with it') and 'Tough Act' ('saying goodbye to a best friend' / 'drain it all 'til its all so hollow'). I love it when there are layers to a story.

Villain — I’ve had the hook of ‘Villain’ stuck in my head all morning. The way she explores rage in this song as something bitter that we all swallow but it burns the whole way down our throats, that dichotomy being explored through the subtlety of the production and the feral lyrics, is absolute genius. The song is told through the perspective of someone that feels wronged but they are still the villain of someone else's story and that's something I can personally relate to. I love how much angst is in the bridge, aided by the build up in the production, as she sings 'whole town's gonna hear how you messed me up.' Truly excellent songwriting.

Brooklyn — I think Maisie absolutely shines when writing songs about her sister. 'Personal Best' is my most played song on Apple Music, ever. 'Brooklyn' is almost like a continuation of that, or a deeper dive into her relationship with her sister. The storytelling aspect of this song feels very organic, like a friend telling you all about the adventure of their transatlantic trip over a cup of coffee. And the production is chef's kiss.

Elvis Song — I think this song is the one I connect with the most. The nostalgia factor always gets me and that's what this entire song is. Is the whole second verse a callout? Maybe. It's fine. If I end up calling the person this song makes me think about, it's Maisie's fault. My favourite lyric is 'I was scared to throw my heart off the edge, easier to tell myself we'd mess it up instead, so I left.' That line reads me, but it also captures the tone of regret that comes with reflection on something that ended. The production of 'Elvis Song' gives me old-flame montage vibes. I think it's the perfect candidate for an end-of-summer single.

Talking To Strangers — 'Talking To Strangers' is such a cute song. The whole concept of random people knowing such minute details about your life, that maybe even the people in your life would overlook, just because this one person that loves you so much can't help but tell everyone they meet about you is so fucking romantic. This is such a romantic song. It is 'this made me think of you' in a song except instead of telling the person you think of, you're telling literally everyone that it made you think of them.

Volcano — 'Volcano' is very reminiscent of Maisie's musical roots, which is why this song is one of my favourites. The lyrics are an actual gut punch and her vocal delivery only makes it hit harder. I think the lines that really get me each time are 'in the silence when you stood there, you just stood there' and the bits in the chorus where she sings 'and your friends said nothing' or 'and the world said nothing.' When you're in a situation that can be toxic, it fucking hurts when no one says anything. Then you look back on it and wonder 'why did no one stop you from absolutely breaking me?'

Tough Act — I think many of the songs on YUSFT accumulate to 'Tough Act' and placing it as the album closer makes so much sense in terms of closure from a lot of these stories that Maisie has shared with us. 'Tough Act' is acknowledgement and growth. I think this is best described in the lyric 'I got busy and you forgot how to miss me when I'm not much of who you grew up with.' She has come to terms with the fact that things have changed and this break up is just 'the bad part of the right thing to do.' The melody of this song is so beautiful and it's only heightened when those strings come in under the piano. Maisie's lovely vocals are the cherry on top.

Ranking the songs on this album was so difficult because each one is so outstanding. I think YSUFT is honestly one of the best pop debuts in recent history. She absolutely nailed it.

Love Him, I Don't

Volcano

Villain

I'm Trying (Not Friends)

Elvis Song

Hollow

Brooklyn

Outdoor Pool

Tough Act

You Signed Up For This

Talking To Strangers

John Hughes Movie

Boy

Psycho

[imreallyhereforkataang]

hello, i don’t know who to ask about this but i’m new to the fandom and saw that you really like kataang. what’s your interpretation of katara’s glance down after the kiss before the invasion? i’m not a fan of the surprise kiss trope but even with that said, i had thought she liked him back. it didn’t seem like she did at that point or through the rest of book 3, and then next thing we knew they were endgame in the finale. sorry for being a bother, i’m just a little confused (like katara i guess haha)

Hi, Anon! Welcome to the fandom! Hopefully it treats you nicely lol.

Ah yeah. I've seen this talked about a lot over the years. And, y'know, I get it. It can seem a little out-of-place at first since, as you noted, Katara shows signs of being romantically interested in Aang beforehand, and now that they've had their second kiss, she doesn't look too happy about it. As someone who ships them, I initially would have loved to see them happy in that moment, to take another minute to themselves just to share grins and maybe laugh a bit because they've taken that step, put their feelings out into the open, and they're both glad for it. To a shipper, or to someone who's rooting for our protagonist to express his feelings, this does feel like a celebratory moment. I'm taken out of the context of the scene for a second because the pretty music has shot in and I'm still surprised at Aang's move and I'm happy to see an actual, mutual (as Katara leans in) kiss between them.  

Then again, this situation is a lot realer for them than it is for me. I'm the viewer, I can hear The Cave of Two Lovers' theme, I can see this being painted in a positive light because we see these two come together for a brief moment, and the narrative is, in a sense, praising that. In-universe, though, it's a bit more complicated, and Katara looking sad really isn't so out-of-place.

Remember where they are and what they're doing, what they were saying moments before and what they're about to risk. For them, this is the quiet before the storm, their possibly final goodbye. Aang is about to fly off and face his destiny, confront what he's been training for over most of the year, "since the day we met" as Katara puts it, and determine the fate of the world based on whether he wins or loses. Whether he comes back or not. And he puts the reality of the situation out there. "What if...what if I don't come back?" It's the threat of that possibility that spurs him to kiss Katara. And she figures as much.

Despite the music suggesting otherwise, this isn't a happy scene (and perhaps that's why we don't get the full score until the finale, because this kiss is only foreshadowing what could be). It's tense, and bittersweet, and pretty tragic imo. Aang knows he could die. He says so. And then he kisses her. And I feel like Katara breaking out into a great big smile in that moment, even though she does have feelings for him, would just seem off. Idk, personally I'm not sure how you (impersonal) can celebrate finally kissing the person you like when you remember that what drove them to make their move just now is the very real possibility they might never see you again. That they're about to leave and face that risk, and there's nothing for you to do about it. Seems like an upsetting situation to be in. 

There's also the fact that I'm skeptical Katara didn't already know Aang had feelings for her. I'm not saying it was always on her mind or that she paid much attention to it, she may have been putting all that stuff on the back burner or pretending it wasn't there as much as it was (including her own feelings) to focus on more important things, but I think she at least knew it subconsciously. I mean, Aang's not very subtle sometimes lol, and they've shared plenty of moments. So when Aang kisses her and Katara jerks back and her eyes widen in surprise, it's not because she didn't expect Aang to have these feelings (at least imo), but because she was in the middle of talking and is taken aback that Aang broke the unspoken barrier between them. 

They're touchy feely throughout the show. Katara's kissed him on the cheek plenty of times, they've even kissed on the lips before now. They have sparks, and they've been dancing around them quite a lot, from the Book 3 premiere at the latest. But they haven't gone that extra step to put it out there too far, where there's no mistaking the meaning behind these gestures. I think, on Katara's end, she would have been okay with putting off making any official moves for a while, given the war and several other possible factors preventing her from feeling able to spend too much conscious thought and emotion on it, and so she's surprised that Aang's kissed her because they'd been keeping their more romantic intentions implicit up until then. She won't be realizing afterwards or celebrating in her head that "omg, the guy I('ve sorta been avoiding my feelings for but actually do) like likes me back," because she’s known this, but it’s been left unsaid and kept slightly quiet in Katara's musings. Now, it's out there in the open, they're past the safe zone, there's little room for ignoring the feelings anymore, and it sucks so much that they had to make their way there now. It's such tragic timing, a kiss that doesn't stem from a smiles and rainbows conversation where they sit down to talk about their feelings and where they want to go from there, but a kiss done out of desperation, out of the possibility that Aang doesn't come back. Through that lens, it's almost like they kissed "too early," especially for what happens next.

See, my impression is that Aang's kiss was meant for two possible scenarios -- Aang loses and thus doesn't come back, which means there's obviously no future for him and Katara. Alternatively, the day is won, the war is over, he comes back and the world is finally at peace; they can stop running, they can celebrate and breathe and talk about where they're going from here in an environment more appropriate for that. And since Katara kissed him back, it seems like she affirmed that there's something there for them, given he returns. But instead, something happens that I don't think they anticipated. Aang does come back, but he didn't win. So, in terms of Katara and Aang, they're now at a bit of an impasse, a situation that their kiss wasn't intended for, and it leads to this semi-awkward limbo because Aang's still alive but ideally that kiss between them wouldn't have happened yet. 

Everyone needs to regroup, start it all over again, keep grinding and come up with a new plan. There's no time to get sidetracked, now more than ever. And, to me, that's reflective of what happens to Katara after Aang kisses her and takes off from the sub.

Katara's reaction is to dwell on the kiss. She wants to, but Sokka reminds her that there's no time to. So Katara snaps herself out of it, and she moves on. And then they survive the Day of Black Sun, but the fight isn't over for them yet.

You asked about the DoBS kiss, so I'm not gonna waste your time hyper-analyzing Ember Island Players because there is a lot that's been offered and discussed about that episode. But if you were to simplify the reason for Katara's stance there, it's pretty much just holding up what was established in DoBS.

At the Invasion, while caught up in surprise because she had an expectation that they wouldn't broach the subject this way, if at all, for a while, Katara kissed Aang back, and she kissed him back because she wanted to. But since then, she's had more time to think, and she won't be so caught off guard next time. Aang expresses during EIP that he wants to try a relationship with Katara sooner rather than later, and that he'd thought she felt the same since she kissed him back (as well as the moments they shared before), but Katara is adamant now about this not being the right time. She fully intends to keep her head in the game, like Sokka reminded her at the Invasion. That's essentially what she thinks Aang needs to remember now, too (and yeah, like I said, there are other ideas that can be brought in that contribute to the articulation, but this is the primary point being conveyed here).

Whatever the reason, her response causes Aang to reevaluate his conclusion about where they stand. Even though the war isn't over, he thought that, because he survived and Katara accepted his kiss before, maybe they could try anyways. But Katara still feels stuck in limbo, and she makes that clear. It's also significant to note that Katara doesn't make Aang any promises about being together after the war, which imo was a good move on the writers' part (I have a wip about this but idk when that'll be done lol). Anyways, Aang backs off, following her lead and putting romance aside.

I do want to talk about the second half of Book 3 as a whole, though, not just EIP. I've seen people criticize this portion of the story in terms of Kataang, but I think that, besides the substance of these episodes, it's important to keep in mind that the last 10 episodes of the series (The Western Air Temple and on) originally aired 7.5 months after Day of Black Sun. Not only that, but these episodes all aired within the same week. It was a big, hyped-up event on Nickelodeon dubbed "Countdown to the Comet," and it took place over the course of 6 days. That sort of schedule for finishing a show is...unusual. But it was also intentional here. 

Even though the episodes don't have to be watched that way, the final 10 episodes are, in a way, all together the final big bang of the series. They're majorly dedicated to the most critical elements of the main story, including Zuko finally, after 2.5 seasons, joining the gaang and him finding his place in it. I'd say that The Western Air Temple to The Southern Raiders are most generally about that, about Zuko being accepted and making amends especially to the original three members of the gaang (who he's hurt much more than Toph). The viewer is gratified by watching Zuko do what we all hoped for him, forming relationships with Aang, Sokka, and Katara after all this time, merging our most important A and B plots. The other major things the last 10 episodes are for are the final battle, of course, because that's going to be our conclusion to this journey, and Aang's preparation for it.   

So yes, onscreen interactions between Aang and Katara are fewer, but by no means does that make the rest of Book 3 an undoing of what they have. All their setup has been established, we're good on that, and we're going to leave that relatively be for now while we delve into the action until we're ready to revisit. And besides, imo, they still have extremely critical moments in the last 10 episodes that I am deeply, deeply happy exist. They're more subtle and less explicitly romantic -- a lot of them take place when they're not even around each other, but they speak volumes to me about how Aang and Katara have influenced each other, and how important the other is to them.

These 10 episodes are like a refocus of our largest priorities, and Kataang coming together is put on hold (again, I think that benefits the main story) for the end. But even though we watch less scenes where they're together, with more scenes of Zuko joining and hanging out with each of them individually in place, there's hardly indication of Katara and Aang avoiding each other after their DoBS kiss, or even post-EIP. 

They're still friends first. What they're avoiding is not each other, but a new possibility for themselves, because right now they're choosing to ground their feet in what they have. Basically, around each other, they're pretending what unfolded between them never happened until, possibly, on Katara's say so, it's appropriate to resume that aspect of their relationship.

And after the war, probably into a few months of peace (based on the state of Sokka's leg), she decided it was. She felt ready, and they dove right in.

I hope that clears things up! And don't worry, you weren't a bother at all! I love talking about these two, but unfortunately I became really busy the past couple days (plus this response got deleted and I couldn't salvage it because I saved a copy of a cursed screenshot of Aang and ig it was scary enough to erase my clipboard history :3). Thanks for your patience lol!

[kkkiraka]

Dream SMP Reincarnation AU ramble - c!Dream

I'm thinking of the theory that Dream's the one who's gonna be the one put into Pandora's Vault. I'm thinking of this god like entity, put into a prison he commissioned himself, cut off from his powers (since if he still had his admin powers he'd just.... go into creative mode, but shhh we're playing in story here), unable to break free. Countries rise, fall, and rise again, eras come and go, and still he stays in the vault. The rest of the smp just moves on without him. They die, other people take their place.

Oh, Dream can still feel his land splintering and slipping away from his grasp, but what can he do about it? He's stuck in this accursed box of a vault, sure, he's skilled, but he personally designed it so that no one could leave. Sam would've closed any holes Dream would've had for himself (probably as like, either a final sacrifice or coerced into doing so forcefully?). Not even death could release him.

So after all the guards and their grandchildren have died, after all the redstone has been eroded by time (which takes a while, i assure you), he toils, day and night, trying to punch his way free of a layered obsidian box, greatly diminished in power and as fractured as his once great land (with mining fatigue III too, sure was glad you put those guardians there, eh, Dream?).

After a couple millenniums, his fist smashes through the last layer of obsidian. The Minotaur is out of the labyrinth. But he's barely upright. You see, the problem about gods (or god-like-entities, close enough) is that they survive mainly on belief. See, everyone believed Dream to be this near-omnicient powerful hunter, and so he was! But now, no one's here to remember him. So as all forgotten gods do, he starts to fade. (To be honest, he started to fade even before he'd been halfway done with breaking out. He's mostly still together by sheer stubbornness, and now that he doesn't have obsidian walls to zero in on, he's unraveling. Fast.)

He's survived this long though, why stop now? So with a final pull of power, Dream tethers his soul to a mortal cycle, reincarnating (also pulling the other SMP members' souls with him and thus being the reason the others reincarnated too? I'm not sure yet).

So now imagine a blonde haired, green eyed phantom of a boy, no one but his close friends really remembering what his face looks like, so hard to pin down during tag, laughter full of childish ignorance. He's a bit strange, yes, with certain odd affectations and mannerisms, but really, just a normal boy.

One day this boy starts dreaming. He starts dreaming of the land he now stands on, empty, vast, untouched. Unified. Inviting friends into his land, one big happy family. Then, the wars. The beginning tremors of a fracturing land. The fighting, the violence, the manipulation, his hand in all of it. Of course, the boy doesn't know what to do with these memories nightmares. So he tries his best to just ignore them (he fails. But he tries). He starts to find correlations between his dreams and really old history books, in everyday life. Then, he stumbles upon the prison.

This... monster of a thing. Calling it just a mere building would be a grave disservice to its size, it's bigger than most cities. It is tall, dark ominous, and familiar. A rush of no no no, not again get out get out GET OUT I HAVE TO GET OUT assaults the boy's mind and roots him in place. By the end of it, when he finally registers that he's not in the vault, he bolts, faster than he's ever ran in this life, Dream runs away.

Something has broke, though. Irreparably. Who is he? Is he the mostly normal boy who goes to school and whose worst problem is where he's gonna hang out after school at? Or is he this god, a shell of spite and anger, losing control over his life and land? Everything is bleeding into each other, and he's a mess.

Eventually, maybe, he puts himself together a bit. The boy clamping down on the god, not doing great, but doing well enough. He resolves to just wait. Wait for what, he can't even say for sure. Even with all his memories, he's still barely a teenage boy, not even a little godling with no power to his name, belief only held by people who are long dead. What is he gonna do, wage wars on all the collective countries that rose after his imprisonment? Nope. He's prepared to wait forever (and isn't that a horrible thought, of forever? Will he die? Can he die? Will he just come back again? Will that monster of a deity be unleased upon the world once more?), if he has to, and wait for a sign, some sort of sign, anything to show him just what the hell he's supposed to do. Does the world even need someone like him anymore?

He almost resigns himself to waiting forever. Until he sees two boys wandering in the forgotten ruins of the original L'manburg. Somewhere no one but him hangs around in anymore (even millennia later, there seems to be an aura of great tragedy that lays here. It makes everyone uncomfortable. Except Dream, who's always uncomfortable nowadays). Two very familiar boys. Maybe his waiting has come to an end. Is this a sign? (He's both terrified and morbidly excited.)

(About a reincarnation au that I'm writing that's inspired by @qarameiio's on twitter. Diving into something they haven't really touched upon yet.

Specifically, c!Dream in this au.)

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

HASO, “Connections.”

Hope everyone is having a good day today, and hope you like the story 

“Explain the difference to me one more time, I just want to make sure I understand.”

“Of course, sir you see t-”

“Admiral, I’m sorry to bother you but the Chairwoman just called, and she needs to speak with you.”

Admiral Vir stood from where he had been sitting with one of the crewmen, and tucked a notebook under one arm. “My Apologies corporal, can we continue this at a later time.”

“Of course, sir. I’ll send those resources I was talking about.”

“It would be much appreciated.”

He stepped out into the hallway pausing by Lt. Simon as she stood waiting for him.

“What is this about?”

“They didn't say, apparently it's too classified for me.”

“Uh-huh.”

Simon looked back over her shoulder as the two of them made their way down the hall, “What was that abou?”

“Corporal Isaa is a bit of a chemistry genius, I was just picking his brain.”

Simon frowned, “Since when did you care about chemistry.”

Since my ex girlfriend became an exalted saint of her entire planet leaving me to wonder if I ever even deserved her in the first place, and with an overwhelming desire to be  better person both morally, physically and intellectually  hoping that I might eventually evolve into the kind of man that could ever compare to a woman like her. Even if it never leads to anything because regardless of how I feel, the desire to become better is never a bad thing.

He shrugged, “You can never know too much, Simon.”

She glanced down at her clipboard, “You’ve been very busy the past few days, are you….ok?” She wasn’t really sure if she should be worried. She wasn't exactly good at reading people emotionally. She only really noticed the changes in patterns, and his sudden change to serious intellectual study and going to the gym twice a day struck her as odd.

Adam smiled  little, “Fine, in fact….. Better than I have in a while. Turns out, I like to stay busy, I like having things to do, and with two hours before bed to relax and unwind, it's not like I’m working myself to death.”

She supposed that was true enough. Where once the men's schedule had been as hard to predict as the evolution of the seasons, his new routine was as plotted as a grid carved by a laser. He hadn’t changed all that much, still goofy, still insistent on listening to distracting  music on the ridge, and wearing those annoying shoes with wheels, but all between his visits to different departments and scrawled notes on hard-copy notebooks, he was beginning to collect in large piles in his quarters.

Two visits to the gym every day, once to work out and once for sparring practice with anyone who would take him on was…. Odd.

A little more so the amount of times he had let Cannon kick the shit out of him, which was many, but the man could take a beating without complaint, so she supposed that was to be…. Admiried? 

Pitied?

No

“Is this about, Sunny?”

Admiral vir almost walked himself into a wall stopping just short as he turned to look at her eyebrows furrowed, “Simon?”

“What/”

“I think you’re getting better at reading people.”

He walked past her without answering the question and into the elevator up to the bridge. They stood quietly inside together as they waited, and Admiral Vir left her behind as he stepped onto deck walking over to take the call.

He sat in the captain's chair as the holo projection buzzed to life before him.

“Chairwoman.”

“Admiral.”

“What can I do for you.”

“Are you busy?”

“I don’t have to be, ma’am.”

“Good, good, something has come up, and we need the expertise of your crew.”

He leaned forward in his seat just a bit, “Go on.” 

“You recall the planet we sent you too, the one with proof of ancient alien inhabitants though there was no evidence of them?”

He shivered, “how could I forget.”

“And you say you encountered… something.”

He nodded “I seem to recall your psychological experts rejected my experience out of hand as…. Head trauma, wasn’t it?”

She sighed “yes, well…. There have been some developments, come to light, and we believe that…. That we were wrong. We would like you to meet up with the scientific team we are sending over, and, if you don’t mind, bring an evaluation of your experience from Dr. Adric, we may want to analyse it more. Our Team wishes to study it in more depth, if that would be acceptable.”

He bowed his head, “Yes, Ma’am. I will. Expect us there within the hour.”

“Our team won’t be ready for a few of your hours yet, so that should give you time to get that evaluation for us.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

***

Dr. Adric stared at the Admiral, sitting across from him in his office. Despite him being here for wildly different reasons than were normal, he couldn't help but analyse the man as if he were one of his patients.

He looked good, healthy, rested, and relaxed, which seemed uncommon for the man within the last year. He was also more  reserved than he had been, which could potentially be a sign of emotional exhaustion or simply increasing maturity, but the man’s easy smile and relaxed posture calmed him to that idea, and he sat back in his chair.

“How are you doing?”

Adam smiled again, “Just can’t help yourself, can you doctor,”

“No, afraid not.”

“I’m alright, hope to keep doing better in the future. I think, Like everyone, I still have my days, but they are less and less as the weeks go on.”

“I am very glad to hear that.”

“Did you get the message from the Chairwoman?”

He nodded, “About your experience on RM-46.”

“Yes.”

“What do you remember?”

He held his holopad in front of him and held it up, recording while he took notes.

“I remember feeling like I was being watched, that was a big one, probably more to do with how eerie the planet was than anything. I was on edge, but not afraid. When I fell into the trapdoor, I remember it was dark at first,”

“Did you hit your head?”

“No, but I did get the wind knocked out of me pretty badly.”

“Go on.”

“There were these little red glowing orbs on the wall and they pulsed on and off as I walked. They were everywhere, and they sort of permeated the room around me which grew bigger and bigger and bigger as I walked, until I was in a massive room, it could have housed a stadium inside it, and at the center of the room I saw this….. this …. Thing… It's hard to describe really but…. Not, impossible to describe, like a tree root, but curled into impossible combinations and connections, where it seemed like one should end another would begin, and where you would assume one would go in front of another it went behind, but in ways that seemed impossible. Like… Like an M.C Echer painting where the water flows uphill. Everything about it seemed to defy the laws of nature but not in a way that one could really explain…. And when I saw it I…. I had such an urge to… to touch it. Like i…. It's impossible to describe.  But you know when you've been underwater for too long and you really need to breathe, and you are so desperate for air that you claw your way back to the surface….. It was like that. And so I reached out, and when I touched it it was… warm, and soft like skin. I Didn’t really have long to think about that thought because before I knew it, itw was like I had been knocked away from my body. Ripped out of myself and cast into the universe.”

He raised a hnd to his head rubbing his temples eyes squinted slightly, “Trying to think about it…. Makes my head hurt because…. It was, unfathomable, there was so much of everything extending into infinity, and all of it was trying to fit inside my head at once. I saw things made and unmade and I felt like I was part of the universe. I was being pulled through everything and nothing and…. I.” He closed his eyes, “I’m sorry, it… it almost hurts to think about.”

He took a deep breath,

“And then I felt as if I was going towards something, somewhere specific, and as I approached…. I…. I felt as if I was going home. Not like home to my parents or even my brothers and sisters but… home.” He sighed, “I’m not explaining this very well. But I felt like I was heading back to somewhere I belonged, it felt warm, like if peace was a location, and there was the only place I could find it. It felt like going to somewhere where I would never hurt again, I would never, want anything ever again. And then…..” he rubbed his head again, “And then I can’t describe, it was like I could see…. Like a veil was being lifted from over my eyes and just as I was looking into… whatever it was, the veil slammed down like an iron shutter and I was pulled back…. I…. Have never felt such a sense of loss….”

He reached up a hand and wiped at his eyes, “I can’t even think about it without crying. It hurts so bad, like heartbreak, not metaphorical,but it physically hurts like my chest is being pulled apart. I think about it and I can’t breathe.” He took a deep breath resting his hand against his chest, “It never seems to fade. If I try to think about it too much, I just hurt.”

Dr. Adric reached out a hand and rested it on the other man’s arm, “We can stop.”

He took a deep breath and nodded, “It's just so, strange. Nothing has ever had that kind of effect on me before, and then just to be told it was all from head trauma, well I don’t buy it. But that wasn’t even the weird part.”

“No?”

“No, when I was there… I didn’t feel… alone…. It felt like, as I was carried away, I was wrapped in the arms of…. something …. Like a child, and when they took me away they said that I wasn't’ ready yet. I Could have imagined it I guess, but I swear, it told me that I wasn’t ready yet, and that is when I woke up five miles away from the city before it collapsed.”

They drew into a long silence.”

“I see.”

“Do I sound crazy?”

“No, I have just never seen a reaction like that…. And you say whenever you think about it.”

“I try to think very little about it. The last time I tried in any sort of way I ended up on the floor in the fetal position sobbing like a child and fell asleep there waking up with an absolutely massive headache, so ys, I try to avoid it whenever possible.”

Dr Adric frowned, “I think that is something we should look into.”

It looked as if Adam was about to argue, but then sighed, “Alright after this is over, I promise, we can look into it, but I am almost 100 percent positive, it isn’t just my head. There was something out there…. something …. Something I am supposed to be a part of, but I’m not.”

Adam turned his head to stare out of the room and into space.

***

Deus, that word again.

 He sat at the desk in his room staring at the piles of notebooks before him, and the projected map hanging in the air just off to the side. He spun in his chair to stare at the projections.

Deus…. The latin word for god or deity repeated back to him from the mouths of aliens.

At the projected map before him, the locations where he had heard those words blinked and pulsed slightly as little lines of glowing thread connected them.

First, it had been the infected starborn, and then it had been the Leviathan, and then from the city before the collapse. Why would a latin word make its way into the vocabulary of creatures who had never even heard latin before. Or perhaps this was just some sort of fluke, it was a big universe and some of the sounds that alien made sometimes made human words, it was bound to happen. But the fact that they meant the same thing swas odd.

He wondered if it was some kind of greeting instead, but shook his head thoughtfully, no, they had been talking to him when they said it, directly speaking to him, but that hardly made sense either, last time he checked he wasn’t some great dity of overwhelming power.

He assumed he would have noticed by now.

He tapped his foot lightly against the ground, and off to the side waffles raised her head, wagging her tail slowly across the floor.

“You confused too, girl?”

She whined softly and rested her head back on her paws.

He turned to look back at the map. He was missing something here, a very big piece of something. And he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know what.

Of course that wasn’t going to stop him he supposed.

[widowsofchaos]

The Wolf, The Widow, & Their Angel

Writing’s Game created by the baddest, Roo! @darkficsyouneveraskedfor​ *screams like a feral banshee* tHe BaDDesT BiTcH sHE iS!

~my given prompt~

Pairing: dark!BuckyNat x black!Reader

Summary: You start to dissociate looking through windows, and it concerns your captors.

Warnings: ddlg relationship, forced age regression, mentions of spanking, water sports, and kidnapping, eventual Stockholm syndrome. a dash of yandere behavior.

a/n: hiii, so glad im finally into the swing of writing, and I really wanted to dive into this writing challenge made by Roo! Trope: Snowed In // Item/Location: Windows. Seems really fun, and gives a chance for people to explore different kinks and scenarios given to them! So I hope you enjoy! There has been things changed for sake of the story, like cause fuck canon sometimes, right? Muahaha💋

do not repost my works!

Snowflakes hit against the windows, sounding like tiny BB bullets as the bellowing winds harshly beats against the bullet-proof glass.

Ever-growing thick piles of snow surrounded the Avengers compound, as New York City is under attack by one of the worst snow-storms the city has ever endured in years.

Airports are temporarily shut-down, so are local businesses, the streets deserted with no sign of life. Nature’s cold wrath forces citizens to self-quarantine, and celebrate Christmas indoors, snowed in for perhaps a few weeks.

So much for your grand escape.

Six months you have been held captive, and forced to prance around like a living doll. A toy to satiate your captors’ sexual appetites and deep-rooted needs to protect ‘an innocent angel like yourself.’ As you sit here on the cold floor of the living room, battling boredom, and your solemn thoughts, mindlessly chewing on the pink paci in your mouth, you didn’t hear one of your captors and one of their accomplices walk in.

Fidgeting in your white onesie that had multiple crayon drawn rainbows printed on it, as you try to find some comfort - your buttocks still stung from this morning’s spanking. Your coco-brown buttocks peaking from your onesie, your diaper peaking from the edges, deep purple and yellow bruises painting your skin were apparent. That’s the abuse a metal prosthetic can inflict.

Your bronze skin now shiny with lotion to soothe the burgundy raw welts. You can barely sit still, rocking back and forth to relieve some tension. Sniffling trying to zone out in your mind.

Your hair was in two split curly pigtails, each split of massive hair clipped with two pink bows. Your index finger twirling in your chocolate curls, as the other hand was toying with the fabric of your white booties, with tears in your eyes, trying to imagine time spent with your real family.

Are they okay? Do they miss you? Have they been searching for you?

You can still recall the day you were kidnapped, it was a blur, it was so quick,

As the two perpetrators waltz silently towards you, as your back facing them, suddenly one of them playfully pull on your pigtails.You gasp, your eyes wide as saucers, as your mouth opened, your paci fell on your lap. Your day-dreaming shattered, as if you were high in the clouds then held by the calf and dragged right back to reality.

“Hey baby.” A husky velvety voice spoke against your ear, your heart hammering harshly against your chest. It’s him, the former Winter Soldier, his close companions call him Bucky, but you’re forced to call him daddy.

“Uncle Steve told me that you have been sitting here for hours” he brought his thumb to wipe away a tear you didn’t realize began to fall. You glanced over your shoulder to see Steve standing by the door-way smiling adoringly at the sight of a daddy and his baby, leaning against the door frame, with his strong hands stuffed in his jean pockets.

You felt menacing cerulean blue eyes burn a hole in your skull, Bucky couldn’t pull his eyes away from yours even if he tried. To him, you were perfect. You were a gift from God, an angel sent to ease his burdens along side his wife, Natasha. You couldn’t bare looking into his eyes, too intense, too suffocating. A flash of affection beamed across his eyes.

You whined, shuffling as best as you could away from your captor, “Baby, you dropped your paci.” Bucky plucked your pacificer from the floor, bringing towards your chapped lips, “Now it’s dirty, my sweet baby can’t have a dirty paci ...” he trailed off, the rims of your eyes slightly red, glossy from the forthcoming droplets.

He knows why you’ve been crying, he had to punish you this morning. You were trying to act like a big girl, and refused to be bathed, insisting you can clean yourself as an adult.

A smirk slowly crept on Bucky’s bearded face, he noticed you was leaning forward, preventing any bodily pressure to increase on your sore ass. “Is my baby’s cute ass sore?” His nose brushed against your cheek, a guttural moan vibrated in his throat, inhaling your scent; his hot breath fanning over your tear-stained face.

His pink lips hairs away from yours, growing agitated that you didn’t respond, he gripped one of your pigtails with his flesh hand.

You yelped in pain, your button nose scrunched, brows furrowed deeply; the prickly pins and needles sensation scorching throughout your scalp, as Bucky held your hair in a death clutch. “Answer your daddy! Is my baby’s cute ass sore?!” Bucky snarls like a beast.

You choked back a sob, forced to look into his cerulean blue eyes, clouded by grey storm clouds. His pupils dilated, his nose flared, not to further infuriate the former soldier, “Ye-yes, daddy -” your throat tightened in fear, “my butt is sore.” Satisfied that you answered sweetly, Bucky relinquished his hand, kissing away your tears with feathery pecks, “Don’t cry, my angel.” His voice lowered softly.

His stubble tickled you, but you resisted a chuckle in your throat along with your untamed bile, he shushed you, “Don’t cry, baby. Daddy’s sorry he had to get loud.” Bucky cooed, talking to you like you were a toddler.

Your sobs quieted down, now simmering to hiccups, as he pulled you flushed against his broad chest. Even when he cradled you, his physicality reminded you, that you can’t escape.

Bucky is at least, two hundred pounds lean, built into massive biceps, and sculpted abs. You can’t fight him, nor her. Natasha’s physique is slender, but she’s toned.

Enquiped to defeat any enemy, a master in trickery and slealth, able to disappear within thin air like her husband ... many have fallen for sadly mistaken the Russian for beauty over brains ... don’t underestimate the former assassin. You already learned your lesson.

Your delicate fingers gripped his red Henley shirt, the cotton fiber bunching between your brown fingers, as you whimpered, your cheek squished against his frame.

Bucky sported a smug smirk on his stubbled jaw, glancing to his oldest best friend. A chuckle was breathed out of Steve’s nose, knowing the breaking down method was slowly progressing.

Steve knows that this is what Bucky, and Natasha needs in their life. Something innocent to protect, the couple hasn’t had a pure light in their life for years, so it’s understandable that for the first time they encountered you, they had to have you.

It was fate.

Indeed the meticulous harsh punishments was working. No matter how hard you tried to fight back, and resist the urges to succumb to their sexual pleasures, your mind was betraying you.

There has been moments of your compliance, calling everyone by their designated names. Natasha as your mommy, Bucky as your daddy, and the rest of the Avengers as your uncles and aunt. Letting your uncles and aunt baby you, feed you, play with you, and punish you if needed too.

Let’s just say, the punishments were just as equally barbarous. Wall-seats, harsh spanking, knees on raw rice, gas lighting, slight choking, knees resting on raw rice, electrical nipple clamps as your head will be dunked in water, that’s Bucky’s go-to if his patience runs dry.

And a few slaps here and there if you cuss everybody out.

Natasha’s favorite is clit cream, it causes severe itching on your pussy, you would rub your mound on any solid surface to relieve yourself to the point of your vagina being raw, and irritated.

How does the sadistic couple help the itching and burning stop? Take turns squirting their piss directly on your clit.

Shame and humiliation has become your constant demons.

Bucky’s red shirt had a strong but subtle smell of mint, and oak. You rubbed your nose into the shirt, it’s calming your frightened senses, as numerous flashbacks of pain came flooding your shattered mind.

“Awh my baby, loves holding her daddy.” Bucky spoke into your brushed curls, you didn’t realize you were practically clinging to Bucky like a baby kola. Bucky nuzzled his nose into your curls, his eyes closed, relishing in this rare moment.

Bucky’s strong biceps slithered around your petite waist, you involuntarily clutching your arms around his neck for support. His open palms calmly rubbed circles under your thighs, but close to your painful bruises.

You flinch at the close proximity of his fingertips grazing your abused flesh. It was his reminder of how quickly his temper can switch.

Don’t misbehave.

You prefer to seek his approval, to fall on his good graces. 

“D-daddy?” you crooked into his now tear-stained shirt, the dampened spots now a deeper shade of red, you sniffled, scared to look him in the eye, “Yes baby?” Bucky’s smirked.

“I wanna look at the windows more. The snowflakes are pretty.” You hated how your voice was trembling, and trailing into little space.

You’re conversing with Bucky as if you were a toddler. One discovery you stumbled on during this ordeal is that deep inside the crevasse of your mind, there’s a little girl.

Sub-space, or little space ... you knew you had it, which in turn, helped you adapt to your new environment from time to time. Catching yourself enjoying being pampered, no longer being burdened by of the problems that come with being an adult. No longer do you work, you hated your office job. You gracefully fall into a space of hazy clouds.

Bucky’s brows furrowed, a bit befuddled, as his eyes pleaded with Steve’s, who in return shook his head, no.

Steve brought this new found habit of yours up to Bucky and Natasha earlier, whenever you were punished, you hide away to look out the windows.

Steve realized that you were probably dissociating. That worried everybody, it means you were suffering from not accepting your new life, clinging onto your old one, and if you’re in pain, Bucky and Natasha are in pain.

You’re more than their little girl, you’re their missing third. Their companion, their angel, and even if you rebuke it, your best friends. Many occurrences, Nat and Bucky has confided to you about their dark pasts, revealing secrets not even their close team mates are aware of.

To gain your trust, and your sympathy, to show despite their cruel punishments, they are broken humans emotionally dependent on you. In any bond between lovers, that’s your best friend.

Out of love — tough love, but love nonetheless.

Bucky’s lip formed into a thin-line, “No, baby. Uncle Steve told me you do this a lot, you know he’s worried about you? So is everybody else, you haven’t even eaten since this morning” Bucky’s voice got stern, but it was contrast to his facial features softening. His brows now slanted in-ward, demonstrating his distress.

It’s the truth, you’re co-dependent on bullet-proof glass. You can observe the outside world. It helps you escape to your imaginary getaway. Whatever your heart desires, your brain creates unabashed scenarios of being surrounded by your family, and friends.

But more recently, you imagine poppy fields, sleeping in high-end stocks of flowers — but soon the demons roam in search of you, and the sky darkens.

“No, baby. No more windows. Ever again.” Bucky’s eyes squinted, you gasped. You were ready to beg, plead to stay on the floor just a little while longer, “Now it’s lunch time. I can hear my little angel’s tummy growling.” Bucky patted your belly gingerly, with no hesitation, he scooped you in his arms lifting you in the air.

Instinctively you locked your legs around his waist, your eyes never wavered from the frosty chilled windows. Your body began shaking, choking back pitiful sobs, as you ducked your head in Bucky’s neck.

“Maybe she needs a nap, she’s been crying all day.” Steve recalls hearing you sniffle since this morning, after getting a spanking. Bucky’s thumb rubbed circles into your shoulder blades, cooing you to settle down.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Bucky kissed your scalp, “she’ll feel better when she wakes up.” As the two soldiers discussed about you as if you weren’t present, you just went limp, your legs dangling. If it wasn’t for Bucky’s inhuman strength, you would’ve fallen.

What’s the point in fighting anymore? Your body is worn, and your brain is fried. There’s no escape, for years you thought so highly of the Avengers, but you learned that they were not so righteous.

Steve noticed your eyes were dull, it’s blank. Steve subtly caressed your cheek, as he walked by Bucky’s side. A small lopsided smile curved at your lips, but Steve was still worried.

Finally reaching Bucky’s apartment, Steve helped open the door as Bucky was pre-occupied holding you, “Steve, can you wash her pacifier for me?” Steve nodded, taking the pacifier from Bucky.

As Steve reached the kitchenette, to wash the paci in the sink, Bucky went to your bedroom. A custom made state of the art bedroom, the walls covered in white wallpaper with multiple printed teddy bears. Fuzzy pink carpeting, stuffies galore spilling out of the bin, toys ranging from blocks, puzzles, coloring books, barbies -- you name it, they spoiled you.

Bucky cooed in your ear sweetly as he laid you down in your custom crib, the plush mattress welcomed your body. You whined a bit, a few tears falling, “Hush, baby, it’s okay. Uncle Stevie is bringing your paci.” Bucky caressed your arms, and face trying to cal, your nerves.

Your eyes were droopy, mental exhaustion overpowering you, but you were resisting sleep. You started rubbing your eyes, as if you were a restless toddler refusing naptime. 

Bucky and Natasha also has been popping sleeping pills, bladder weakening pills and birth control pills in your milk. To set your body on schedule, so you can learn to adapt using a diaper. Fall sleep at proper time during the day. 

Steve entered the bedroom, to see Bucky trying to stop you from your agitated state. “She’s fussy.”Steve’s tone was laced with concern, he quickly gave Bucky the paci, and you shut your mouth. “It’s okay, baby. It’s your paci, say ah.” Bucky was trying to persuade you, you hated that you were becoming dependent on it.

You pouted, Bucky sighed. Once again, he had to resort doing it the hard way. Bucky pinched your nose shut, preventing any oxygen, after a few seconds, you had no choice, but to open your mouth for air.

You gasped, and Bucky took advantage, quickly popping the paci in your mouth, shutting your mouth with his palms. You whined, as Bucky kissed your forehead. Bucky tucked you in, “I love you, angel.” With that Bucky and Steve started leaving the room, turning the light switch off, and closed the door behind them.

Darkness and silence looming over you, your eyes drooped shut, drifting into a dreamless slumber.

***

It’s been over an hour of naptime, and finally Natasha returned from training. She entered the apartment to see Bucky sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. “Bucky, what’s wrong?” He lifted his gaze up, and Nat saw tears in his eyes.

Nat dashed to her husband’s aid, sitting next to him on the couch. “What’s wrong? What happened?” Nat was growing increasingly worried, “Our angel hates me.” Bucky croaked, his voice was hoarse. Natasha pulled Bucky into her arms, Bucky sniffled as he sunk himself into her chest.

“She doesn’t hate you. She’s still learning.”

“You didn’t see the fear in her eyes today. Her eyes looked dull, as if she wasn’t there. Even Steve saw it.” Bucky wailed in Nat’s arms. “It’s okay, she’s not broken. It’s not a quick procedure to get our angel. She will realize this is what’s good for her.”

“I just want her to be happy with us.”

“I know, Bucky. Me too.” Natasha kissed his head.

What Natasha didn’t realize was that you heard their conversation, as you awoke from your nap.

***

Was life with these people really that hard? They spoil you to no end. Yes, their choice of punishments aren’t ordeal, but after punishments they soothed you as if you were the most fragile treasure in the world. Can you learn to love them? Perhaps. Do you feel bad for them hurting? A little, and that’s what scares you.

You care, and it’s been bothering you.

For weeks, your hatred towards the Avengers has been simmering down. You did enjoy no longer having responsibilities, enjoying little space, you were slipping into the headspace more and more.

As thoughts were swirling in your mind like angry bees, the door opened, you quickly closed your eyes again. The light turned on, and their footsteps sounded quiet, not wanting to disturb your sleep, towards your massive crib.

Natasha and Bucky were hovering over you, watching you sleep, as if it’s their favorite view. So obsessed with you, vowing to kill anyone who will try to take you away from them.

Both Nat, and Bucky brought their fingers to your face, caressing your tear-stained cheeks. It was like this for a few moments, until they slowly shook you awake. Tenderly they coaxed you awake, your eyelids fluttered open.

“Hey pretty girl, time to wake up.” Natasha softly ruffled your curly ponytails. You don’t know what snapped in you, maybe your brain has given up, or maybe it’s the way these two are affectionately staring down at you.

Beyond the misty darkness that clouds their eyes, is love. Moments of good moments of playtime with them, or how they touched you giving you cummies, your body coming alive to their touch, or how your heart ached at their sadness flashed in your mind.

Maybe you do love them.

“Mommy. Daddy.” You mumbled against your paci, you made grabby hands outward to them. Natasha’s and Bucky’s eyes widened, their breaths hitched in their throats. At last, their little girl wants them - on her accord.

Natasha quickly took you out of the crib, holding you in her arms in an air tight hug. Bucky engulfed both of you in a bear hug.

At last.

***

It’s been a few weeks of you being the perfect angel, and quite frankly, you were happy. Stress of freedom slipped away, you were taken cared off. Adulthood was hard on you until Natasha and Bucky took you. It was unorthodox at first, slipping into your old apartment in the dead of the night, but it was worth it.

You were sitting on Bucky’s lap, as he sat on the couch watching cartoons with you. Your back against his chest, Bucky hugging you in his arms, your arm reaching behind his head, as your hand played with his hair. Bucky melts every-time you do that. You were sucking on your paci, and Natasha was in the kitchen preparing dinner.

The peaceful atmosphere was soon disrupted, as an urgent news broadcast flashed on the screen. You whined, and Bucky started looking for the remote to change the channel.

The broadcast flashed a picture of you, explaining that you were still declared missing, and your family was looking for you. Bucky’s whole body froze, as your silence was making him nervous. Natasha slowly peaked her head out from the kitchen.

You were unfazed, but you’re not dumb. You knew you had to reassure them, “Daddy, change the channel! I want cartoons.” You bounced a bit on his lap, to show your bratty impatience. Bucky picked up the remote, and put cartoon network on.

Both Nat’s, and Bucky’s heart fluttered, you didn’t care about your old life anymore. You took your paci out for a moment, and kissed your daddy. “I love you, daddy.” You put the paci back in your mouth, and watched the cartoons.

Bucky had tears in his eyes, and so did Natasha.

Their angel didn’t hate them, their angel loves them, and they love you.

Extra A/N: sorry that this was trash. This was beyond trash, I’m so sorry! This was rushed, and I’m bothered by it.

[angelhummel]

once again i spent hours of my life answering >5000 questions in order to sort almost all of the glee songs ever (there’s 683 songs in the sorter when there’s over 700 on the show) anyway if you wanna see my rankings for those then check it out <3 [also here’s the sorter!]

1 Being Alive 2 Rose's Turn 3 Baby, It's Cold Outside 4 Le Jazz Hot 5 Maybe This Time 6 And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going 7 Come What May 8 To Sir, With Love 9 As If We Never Said Goodbye 10 Valerie 11 Somewhere Only We Know 12 Cough Syrup 13 Teenage Dream 14 Not The Boy Next Door 15 It's Too Late 16 It's My Life / Confessions Part II 17 Start Me Up / Livin' On A Prayer 18 When I Get You Alone 19 The Happening 20 The Boy Is Mine 21 Home 22 Don't You Want Me 23 How Will I Know 24 Bad Romance 25 Not While I'm Around 26 Scream 27 Shake It Out 28 On My Own 29 Hate On Me 30 Bills, Bills, Bills 31 4 Minutes 32 True Colors 33 There Are Worse Things I Could Do 34 Go Your Own Way 35 Jessie's Girl 36 Proud Mary 37 Tongue Tied 38 Last Christmas 39 Somebody Loves You 40 Back To Black 41 Sweet Transvestite 42 For Good 43 At The Ballet 44 Gloria 45 Blame It (On The Alcohol) 46 Like A Prayer 47 So Emotional 48 Misery 49 Nasty / Rhythm Nation 50 Toxic 51 Don't Speak 52 Born This Way 53 Dog Days Are Over 54 Defying Gravity 55 Last Name 56 Womanizer 57 I Will Always Love You 58 Broadway Baby 59 The Lady Is A Tramp 60 I'm A Slave 4 U 61 Centerfold / Hot In Herre 62 Thriller / Heads Will Roll 63 Bust Your Windows 64 Candyman 65 Brave 66 Boys / Boyfriend 67 The Scientist 68 The Scientist (Acapella) 69 Dream On 70 Hey Jude 71 I Lived 72 I'm Still Here 73 I Believe In A Thing Called Love 74 Me Against The Music 75 Like A Virgin 76 My Man 77 Everybody Wants To Rule The World 78 I Have Nothing 79 Blackbird 80 Got To Get You Into My Life 81 Animal 82 3 83 I Follow Rivers 84 Just The Way You Are 85 Constant Craving 86 Don't Stop Me Now 87 Hung Up 88 Let's Have A Kiki 89 Love Shack 90 Marry The Night 91 Hit Me With Your Best Shot / One Way Or Another 92 It's Not Right, But It's Okay 93 I Want To Hold Your Hand 94 All You Need Is Love 95 Getting Married Today 96 Don't Rain On My Parade 97 Don't Stop Believin' (Regionals) 98 We've Got Tonite 99 Smooth Criminal 100 Uptown Girl 101 Sway 102 If I Die Young 103 No One Is Alone 104 Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee 105 No Scrubs 106 Mamma Mia 107 Papa Don't Preach 108 Teenage Dream (Acoustic Version) 109 Santa Baby 110 We Found Love 111 Roar 112 She's Not There 113 Spotlight 114 The Way You Look Tonight/You're Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile 115 Some Nights 116 Rumour Has It / Someone Like You 117 You Make Me Feel So Young 118 You Keep Me Hangin' On 119 I'll Stand By You (Amber) 120 Hand In My Pocket / I Feel The Earth Move 121 Crazy / U Drive Me Crazy 122 Funny Girl 123 Cold Hearted 124 Keep Holding On 125 Bye Bye Bye / I Want It That Way 126 I Know Where I've Been 127 I Kissed A Girl (Season Six) 128 Hopelessly Devoted To You 129 Homeward Bound / Home 130 Into The Groove 131 Hold On 132 Tell Him 133 Nutbush City Limits 134 Because You Loved Me 135 Perfect 136 Cherish / Cherish 137 Do You Wanna Touch Me (Oh Yeah) 138 Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead 139 You Are The Sunshine Of My Life 140 Tik Tok 141 The Safety Dance 142 Oops!... I Did It Again 143 Run Joey Run 144 Time Warp 145 Something's Coming 146 Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go 147 The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face 148 Vogue 149 Downtown 150 Diva 151 Dancing With Myself 152 Rockstar 153 Wrecking Ball 154 We Are Young 155 I Saw Her Standing There 156 Jumpin', Jumpin' 157 Just Can't Get Enough 158 Take Me To Church 159 Wannabe 160 It's All Over 161 Take Me Home Tonight 162 If I Were A Boy 163 Landslide 164 Pompeii 165 The Bitch Is Back / Dress You Up 166 Christmas Wrapping 167 Buenos Aires 168 Call Me Maybe 169 You Can't Stop The Beat 170 Seasons Of Love 171 Safety Dance 172 Dream A Little Dream 173 Alfie 174 I Want To Break Free 175 Baby One More Time 176 A House Is Not A Home 177 Daydream Believer 178 I Don't Know How To Love Him 179 Hungry Like The Wolf / Rio 180 Suddenly Seymour 181 People 182 Silly Love Songs 183 Love Song 184 Shout It Out Loud 185 Some People 186 One Of Us 187 Sing! 188 Up Up Up 189 Torn 190 Popular 191 This Is The New Year 192 Paradise By The Dashboard Light 193 Let It Snow 194 Let It Be 195 Never Can Say Goodbye 196 Touch A Touch A Touch A Touch Me 197 La Isla Bonita 198 Tightrope 199 My Love Is Your Love 200 Love Is A Battlefield 201 Losing My Religion 202 Total Eclipse Of The Heart 203 This Time 204 I Dreamed A Dream 205 Leaving On A Jet Plane 206 Locked Out Of Heaven 207 Chandelier 208 Girl On Fire 209 Telephone 210 Don't Cry For Me Argentina 211 Human Nature 212 Halo / Walking On Sunshine 213 Anything Goes / Anything You Can Do 214 Make You Feel My Love 215 Stronger 216 Nowadays / Hot Honey Rag 216 Pumpin' Blood 218 Papa Can You Hear Me? 219 Summer Nights 220 Sweet Caroline 221 Superstition 222 We Will Rock You 223 Alone 224 Hello, I Love You 225 Against All Odds (Take A Look At Me Now) 226 A Hard Day's Night 227 Mine 228 My Prerogative 229 Beauty School Drop Out 230 My Lovin' (You're Never Gonna Get It) 231 Extraordinary Merry Christmas 232 Every Breath You Take 233 Express Yourself 234 Everybody Talks 235 Everytime 236 Marry You 237 Moves Like Jagger / Jumpin' Jack Flash 238 My Favorite Things 239 Santa Claus Is Coming To Town 240 River Deep, Mountain High 241 My Life Would Suck Without You 242 Be Okay 243 Applause 244 Cool 245 All I Want For Christmas Is You 246 American Boy 247 Cell Block Tango 248 Breakaway 249 Don't Dream It's Over 250 Let Me Love You (Until You Learn To Love Yourself) 251 Whatever Happened To Saturday Night? 252 Without You 253 Science Fiction Double Feature 254 Loser Like Me 255 I Kissed A Girl 256 I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance With You 257 I Can't Go For That (No Can Do) / You Make My Dreams 258 Don't Stop Believin' (Season 5) 259 Empire State Of Mind 260 Old Time Rock & Roll / Danger Zone 261 Take My Breath Away 262 You Get What You Give 263 Take On Me 264 Beautiful 265 It's Time 266 ABC 267 Afternoon Delight 268 Don't Stand So Close To Me / Young Girl 269 Don't Stop Believin' (Season 1) 270 Colorblind 271 Cool Kids 272 Dancing Queen 273 Songbird 274 Somebody That I Used To Know 275 Singing In The Rain / Umbrella 276 I Feel Pretty / Unpretty 277 Borderline / Open Your Heart 278 In My Life 279 I'm Still Standing 280 Blow Me (One Last Kiss) 281 Do Ya Think I'm Sexy? 282 Do They Know It's Christmas? 283 Mustang Sally 284 Pinball Wizard 285 Anything Could Happen 286 America 287 Any Way You Want It 288 Higher Ground 289 Flashdance... What A Feeling 290 My Life 291 Let It Go 292 If I Can't Have You 293 L-O-V-E 294 Closer 295 Addicted To Love 296 Heroes 297 A Boy Like That 298 Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend / Material Girl 299 Holding Out For A Hero 300 Dinosaur 301 Disco Inferno 302 Party All The Time 303 Raise Your Glass 304 Push It 305 Lean On Me 306 Pure Imagination 307 Lovefool 308 Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin' 309 Americano / Dance Again 310 All Of Me 311 At Last 312 Promises, Promises 313 Hair / Crazy In Love 314 Happy Xmas (War Is Over) 315 Chasing Pavements 316 Don't You (Forget About Me) 317 Love Child 318 School's Out 319 Poker Face 320 Boogie Shoes 321 Bootylicious 322 I Love New York / New York, New York 323 One Less Bell To Answer 324 Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Yours 325 Rehab 326 I Don't Want To Know 327 Shout 328 I'm The Greatest Star 329 I Love It 330 Never Say Never 331 Juke Box Hero 332 One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer 333 Glad You Came 334 For Once In My Life 335 Here Comes The Sun 336 Baby It's You 337 Drive My Car 338 Last Friday Night 339 Roots Before Branches 340 The Only Exception 341 Survivor / I Will Survive 342 All Or Nothing 343 Time After Time 344 You're The One That I Want 345 Yeah! 346 Starships 347 You've Got To Hide Your Love Away 348 Story Of My Life 349 Something 350 We Need A Little Christmas 351 Gold Digger 352 Beth 353 Fighter 354 Forget You 355 How To Be A Heartbreaker 356 Get Back 357 Love You Like A Love Song 358 There's A Light (Over At The Frankenstein Place) 359 We Got The Beat 360 Make 'Em Laugh 361 Sing 362 U Can't Touch This 363 Try A Little Tenderness 364 Pony 365 On Our Way 366 Lucky Star 367 Loser 368 Over The Rainbow 369 Outcast 370 Stop! In The Name Of Love / Free Your Mind 371 What Makes You Beautiful 372 Will You Love Me Tomorrow / Head Over Feet 373 Wide Awake 374 Wishin' And Hoping 375 Yesterday 376 Out Here On My Own 377 You're All The World To Me 378 Somethin' Stupid 379 Someday We'll Be Together 380 River 381 The Longest Time 382 Somebody To Love 383 The Edge Of Glory 384 The Most Wonderful Day Of The Year 385 Lucky 386 Memory 387 Mary's Boy Child 388 Longest Time 389 My Dark Side 390 Taking Chances 391 The First Noël 392 Smile 393 Celebrity Skin 394 All That Jazz 395 A Thousand Years 396 Big Girls Don't Cry 397 Ain't No Way 398 Don't Sleep In The Subway 399 Doo Wop (That Thing) 400 Don't Stop 401 Uptight (Everything's Alright) 402 New York State Of Mind 403 Turning Tables 404 Vacation 405 Fire 406 Hold It Against Me 407 I've Gotta Be Me 408 Endless Love 409 Run The World (Girls) 410 Saving All My Love For You 411 Give Up The Funk 412 I Am Changing 413 I Melt With You 414 I Could Have Danced All Night 415 Fat Bottomed Girls 416 Hot For Teacher 417 Never Going Back Again 418 Imagine 419 Jolene 420 Arthur's Theme 421 Damn It, Janet 422 Control 423 Barracuda 424 Copacabana 425 Barely Breathing 426 I Look To You 427 Come Sail Away 428 Jump 429 Clarity 430 Friday I'm In Love 431 Jar Of Hearts 432 It's Not Unusual 433 Footloose 434 Here Comes Santa Claus 435 Happy Days Are Here Again / Get Happy 436 Help! 437 Greased Lightning 438 Hell To The No 439 All Out Of Love 440 (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman 441 Candles 442 All By Myself 443 Hello Goodbye 444 It's A Man's Man's Man's World 445 I Say A Little Prayer 446 It Must Have Been Love 447 Just Give Me A Reason 448 Come See About Me 449 Born To Hand Jive 450 I Want To Know What Love Is 451 I Wish 452 I'll Remember 453 Get It Right 454 (I've Had) The Time Of My Life 455 I'll Stand By You (Cory) 456 Forever Young 457 A Change Would Do You Good 458 Smile (Charlie Chaplin song) 459 Best Day Of My Life 460 An Innocent Man 461 Dreams 462 All About That Bass 463 Home (originally by Michael Bublé) 464 Black Or White 465 Baby 466 Bad 467 Problem 468 Oh Chanukah 469 What Kind Of Fool 470 Wings 471 You're My Best Friend 472 You're All I Need To Get By 473 White Christmas 474 Whenever I Call You Friend 475 Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' 476 What Doesn't Kill You (Stronger) 477 Wedding Bell Blues 478 More Than A Feeling 479 More Than A Woman 480 Our Day Will Come 481 P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing) 482 Here's To Us 483 Honesty 484 Hall Of Fame 485 It's All Coming Back To Me Now 486 Teach Your Children 487 Night Fever 488 What The World Needs Now 489 Listen 490 Let Me Love You 491 Live While We're Young 492 Light Up The World 493 Trouty Mouth 494 Werewolves Of London 495 Kiss 496 Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas 497 Movin' Out (Anthony's Song) 498 Mickey 499 Mean 500 Mercy 501 Merry Christmas Darling 502 Let's Wait Awhile 503 Man In The Mirror 504 Rather Be 505 Rise 506 Good Vibrations 507 Faithfully 508 Firework 509 How Deep Is Your Love 510 Fix You 511 Fire And Rain 512 Give Your Heart A Break 513 Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree 514 Little Girls 515 Cry 516 Bust A Move 517 Bridge Over Troubled Water 518 Bring Him Home 519 Cheek To Cheek 520 Break Free 521 As Long As You're There 522 Big Ass Heart 523 Bitch 524 Bamboleo / Hero 525 Away In A Manger 526 Deck The Rooftop 527 Christmas Eve With You 528 Angels We Have Heard On High 529 Creep 530 Crush 531 Make No Mistake, She's Mine 532 Lose My Breath 533 Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee (Reprise) 534 What I Did For Love 535 Wake Me Up 536 Thousand Miles 537 Take A Bow 538 Still Got Tonight 539 The Music Of The Night 540 Stereo Hearts 541 The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late) 542 Take Me Or Leave Me 543 I'm The Only One 544 Isn't She Lovely 545 I Just Can't Stop Loving You 546 I'll Never Fall In Love Again 547 Unchained Melody 548 You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch 549 You Have More Friends Than You Know 550 You Should Be Dancing 551 I'm His Child 552 You Learn / You've Got A Friend 553 Somewhere 554 So Far Away 555 Uptown Funk 556 The Winner Takes It All 557 They Long To Be Close To You 558 Tonight 559 Being Good Isn't Good Enough 560 You May Be Right 561 To Love You More 562 Don't Wanna Lose You 563 Do You Hear What I Hear? 564 Ice Ice Baby 565 Don't Go Breaking My Heart 566 Don't Make Me Over 567 I Won't Give Up 568 I'll Be Home For Christmas 569 I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For 570 I Still Believe / Super Bass 571 I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me) 572 I Want You Back 573 Father Figure 574 Everybody Hurts 574 Gangnam Style 576 We Are The Champions 577 Stayin' Alive 578 Superman 579 The Rose 580 Don't Stop Believin' (Rachel) 581 Fly / I Believe I Can Fly 582 Gives You Hell 583 I Love L.A. 584 Mr. Roboto / Counting Stars 585 O Holy Night 586 Only The Good Die Young 587 One 588 Silent Night 589 Piano Man 590 Sexy And I Know It 591 Sgt. Pepper's Lonley Hearts Club Band 592 Pretending 593 Physical 594 Danny's Song 595 Stand 596 The Final Countdown 597 You Can't Always Get What You Want 598 You Are Woman, I Am Man 599 You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin' 600 Your Song 601 Say 602 No Air 603 Need You Now 604 No Surrender 605 Piece Of My Heart 606 Thong Song 607 Blurred Lines 608 Another One Bites The Dust 609 I Was Here 610 Bella Notte 611 I Know What Boys Like 612 God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen 613 Glory Days 614 Friday 615 More Than Words 616 Waiting For A Girl Like You 617 Welcome Christmas 618 You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) 619 You Give Love A Bad Name 620 We Built This City 621 Whistle 622 Who Are You Now? 623 You And I / You And I 624 Take Care Of Yourself 625 Tell Me Something Good 626 The Rain In Spain 627 Can't Fight This Feeling 628 Jingle Bell Rock 629 In Your Eyes 630 Hello 631 Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life) 632 I Only Have Eyes For You 633 Jingle Bells 634 Joy To The World 635 I Wanna Sex You Up 636 Fight For Your Right (To Party) 637 Feliz Navidad 638 I'm So Excited 639 Uninvited 640 The Living Years 641 The Fox (What Does The Fox Say?) 642 O Christmas Tree 643 One Love (People Get Ready) 644 Ohio 645 Only Child 646 Hello Twelve, Hello Thirteen, Hello Love 647 My Sharona 648 Dance The Night Away 649 Poison 650 My Cup 651 Not The End 652 What It Feels Like For A Girl 653 Listen To Your Heart 654 Little Drummer Boy 655 One Hand, One Heart 656 Bein' Green 657 Big Spender 658 Billionaire 659 Ben 660 Gimme More 661 Burning Up 662 Hey Ya! 663 Hey, Soul Sister 664 Baby Got Back 665 Blue Christmas 666 Bohemian Rhapsody 667 Far From Over 668 The Trolley Song 669 Starlight Express 670 Whip It 671 You're The Top 672 Red Solo Cup 673 Next To Me 674 Rolling In The Deep 675 Rainbow Connection 676 La Cucaracha 677 (You're) Having My Baby 678 A Little Less Conversation 679 Happy 680 Highway To Hell 681 Same Love 682 Rock Lobster 683 Girls Just Want To Have Fun

[backslashdelta]

Glee Soundtrack Rating Project Results: stoner-brett

@stoner-brett

Favourite character: Kurt Hummel

Least favourite character: Will Schuester

Favourite season: Season 3

Least favourite season: Season 6

Mean song rating: 6.52

Mean song rating for favourite character's songs: 7.33

Mean song rating for favourite character's solos: 7.71

Mean song rating season 1: 5.9

Mean song rating season 2: 6.47

Mean song rating season 3: 6.78

Mean song rating season 4: 6.8

Mean song rating season 5: 6.83

Mean song rating season 6: 6.09

Songs rated: 538

[ID: A bar chart titled Number of songs assigned each rating by Trent-warbler , illustrating the number of times each score was assigned to a song by Trent-warbler . 10 was assigned 43 times, 9 was assigned 68 times, 8 was assigned 113 times, 7 was assigned 84 times, 6 was assigned 61 times, 5 was assigned 60 times, 4 was assigned 36 times, 3 was assigned 32 times, 2 was assigned 27 times, 1 was assigned 14 times, and 164 songs were not rated.]

About the Project | Results Masterpost

Ranking:

1. (10) - S1x06 - It's My Life/Confessions Part II

2. (10) - S1x13 - And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going

3. (10) - S1x15 - 4 Minutes

4. (10) - S1x18 - Jessie's Girl

5. (10) - S1x18 - Rose's Turn

6. (10) - S2x04 - Le Jazz Hot

7. (10) - S2x04 - River Deep, Mountain High

8. (10) - S2x09 - Dog Days Are Over

9. (10) - S2x10 - Baby, It's Cold Outside

10. (10) - S2x18 - As If We Never Said Goodbye

11. (10) - S2x18 - I Feel Pretty/Unpretty

12. (10) - S2x21 - My Man

13. (10) - S2x22 - For Good

14. (10) - S3x01 - You Can't Stop the Beat

15. (10) - S3x02 - Something's Coming

16. (10) - S3x03 - Spotlight

17. (10) - S3x03 - Cool

18. (10) - S3x03 - It's All Over

19. (10) - S3x06 - Rumour Has It/Someone Like You

20. (10) - S3x08 - We Are Young

21. (10) - S3x11 - I Want You Back

22. (10) - S3x13 - Love Shack

23. (10) - S3x14 - Cough Syrup

24. (10) - S3x16 - You Should Be Dancing

25. (10) - S3x16 - More Than a Woman

26. (10) - S3x16 - If I Can't Have You

27. (10) - S3x16 - Night Fever

28. (10) - S3x17 - I Have Nothing

29. (10) - S3x17 - How Will I Know

30. (10) - S3x18 - Not the Boy Next Door

31. (10) - S3x21 - Paradise By the Dashboard Light

32. (10) - S4x06 - Beauty School Dropout

33. (10) - S4x09 - Being Alive

34. (10) - S5x03 - Make You Feel My Love

35. (10) - S5x03 - If I Die Young

36. (10) - S5x06 - Movin' Out (Anthony's Song)

37. (10) - S5x09 - I Believe in a Thing Called Love

38. (10) - S5x10 - Gloria

39. (10) - S5x12 - Valerie

40. (10) - S5x13 - Don't Stop Believin' (Season Five)

41. (10) - S5x14 - Rockstar

42. (10) - S5x15 - I'm Still Here

43. (10) - S5x18 - Doo Wop (That Thing)

44. (9) - S1x05 - Last Name

45. (9) - S1x05 - Maybe This Time

46. (9) - S1x06 - Halo/Walking On Sunshine

47. (9) - S1x08 - Sweet Caroline

48. (9) - S1x13 - Don't Rain on My Parade

49. (9) - S1x16 - Home

50. (9) - S1x17 - Total Eclipse of the Heart

51. (9) - S1x18 - Lady Is a Tramp

52. (9) - S1x19 - Dream a Little Dream

53. (9) - S1x21 - Give Up the Funk

54. (9) - S1x21 - Good Vibrations

55. (9) - S2x01 - Listen

56. (9) - S2x03 - I Want to Hold Your Hand

57. (9) - S2x03 - Only the Good Die Young

58. (9) - S2x04 - Sing!

59. (9) - S2x05 - Science Fiction Double Feature

60. (9) - S2x12 - P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)

61. (9) - S2x13 - I Know What Boys Like

62. (9) - S2x16 - Raise Your Glass

63. (9) - S2x16 - Big Ass Heart

64. (9) - S2x17 - I Follow Rivers

65. (9) - S2x18 - Somewhere Only We Know

66. (9) - S2x18 - Born This Way

67. (9) - S2x20 - I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance with You

68. (9) - S3x01 - We Got the Beat

69. (9) - S3x04 - Candyman

70. (9) - S3x06 - I Can't Go for That/You Make My Dreams Come True

71. (9) - S3x06 - Hot for Teacher

72. (9) - S3x07 - Constant Craving

73. (9) - S3x08 - ABC

74. (9) - S3x09 - All I Want for Christmas Is You

75. (9) - S3x11 - Smooth Criminal

76. (9) - S3x13 - L-O-V-E

77. (9) - S3x14 - Fly/I Believe I Can Fly

78. (9) - S3x15 - Rio/Hungry Like the Wolf

79. (9) - S3x15 - Somebody That I Used to Know

80. (9) - S3x17 - It's Not Right But It's Okay

81. (9) - S3x17 - My Love Is Your Love

82. (9) - S3x17 - I Wanna Dance With Somebody (Who Loves Me)

83. (9) - S3x17 - So Emotional

84. (9) - S3x18 - Shake It Out

85. (9) - S4x02 - Hold It Against Me

86. (9) - S4x02 - 3

87. (9) - S4x03 - Celebrity Skin

88. (9) - S4x04 - Teenage Dream (Acoustic)

89. (9) - S4x04 - Give Your Heart a Break

90. (9) - S4x04 - Mine

91. (9) - S4x08 - Let's Have a Kiki/Turkey Lurkey Time

92. (9) - S4x09 - All That Jazz

93. (9) - S4x13 - Bring Him Home

94. (9) - S4x14 - Getting Married Today

95. (9) - S4x17 - Against All Odds (Take a Look at Me Now)

96. (9) - S4x21 - For Once in My Life

97. (9) - S4x21 - Signed, Sealed, Delivered, I'm Yours

98. (9) - S5x03 - I'll Stand By You

99. (9) - S5x12 - Defying Gravity

100. (9) - S5x12 - Toxic

101. (9) - S5x14 - Don't Sleep in the Subway

102. (9) - S5x15 - Colorblind

103. (9) - S5x17 - I'm the Greatest Star

104. (9) - S5x17 - Pumpin Blood

105. (9) - S5x20 - American Boy

106. (9) - S5x20 - Shakin' My Head

107. (9) - S6x02 - Tightrope

108. (9) - S6x02 - Mustang Sally

109. (9) - S6x09 - I Want to Break Free

110. (9) - S6x09 - Cool Kids

111. (9) - S6x13 - The Winner Takes It All

112. (8) - S1x09 - Dancing With Myself

113. (8) - S1x10 - Don't Stand So Close to Me/Young Girl

114. (8) - S1x10 - Crush

115. (8) - S1x13 - My Life Would Suck Without You

116. (8) - S1x14 - Hello, I Love You

117. (8) - S1x14 - Highway to Hell

118. (8) - S1x15 - What It Feels Like for a Girl

119. (8) - S1x15 - Vogue

120. (8) - S1x17 - Run Joey Run

121. (8) - S1x19 - Dream On

122. (8) - S1x20 - Bad Romance

123. (8) - S1x22 - Faithfully

124. (8) - S1x22 - Any Way You Want It/Lovin' Touchin' Squeezin'

125. (8) - S2x03 - I Look to You

126. (8) - S2x04 - Happy Days Are Here Again/Get Happy

127. (8) - S2x05 - Whatever Happened to Saturday Night?

128. (8) - S2x05 - Time Warp

129. (8) - S2x05 - There's a Light (Over at the Frankenstein Place)

130. (8) - S2x05 - Damn It, Janet

131. (8) - S2x06 - One Love (People Get Ready)

132. (8) - S2x06 - Start Me Up/Livin' on a Prayer

133. (8) - S2x07 - Nowadays/Hot Honey rag

134. (8) - S2x11 - Bills, Bills, Bills

135. (8) - S2x12 - Fat Bottomed Girls

136. (8) - S2x13 - Take Me or Leave Me

137. (8) - S2x14 - Blame It (On the Alcohol)

138. (8) - S2x14 - Don't You Want Me

139. (8) - S2x14 - One Bourbon, One Scotch, One Beer

140. (8) - S2x15 - Animal

141. (8) - S2x16 - Hell to the No

142. (8) - S2x16 - Only Child

143. (8) - S2x18 - I've Gotta Be Me

144. (8) - S2x20 - Jar of Hearts

145. (8) - S2x21 - Pure Imagination

146. (8) - S2x21 - Back to Black

147. (8) - S3x04 - Take Care of Yourself

148. (8) - S3x07 - Jolene

149. (8) - S3x07 - I Kissed a Girl

150. (8) - S3x08 - Survivor/I Will Survive

151. (8) - S3x08 - Red Solo Cup

152. (8) - S3x09 - Christmas Wrapping

153. (8) - S3x09 - Let It Snow

154. (8) - S3x11 - Black or White

155. (8) - S3x11 - Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'

156. (8) - S3x11 - Never Can Say Goodbye

157. (8) - S3x12 - Don't Wanna Lose You

158. (8) - S3x13 - I Will Always Love You

159. (8) - S3x14 - Glad You Came

160. (8) - S3x15 - Fighter

161. (8) - S3x16 - Stayin' Alive

162. (8) - S3x18 - Cell Block Tango

163. (8) - S3x19 - What Makes You Beautiful

164. (8) - S3x20 - Mean

165. (8) - S3x21 - It's All Coming Back to Me Now

166. (8) - S3x21 - Edge of Glory

167. (8) - S3x22 - In My Life

168. (8) - S3x22 - Roots Before Branches

169. (8) - S4x01 - Chasing Pavements

170. (8) - S4x01 - New York State of Mind

171. (8) - S4x03 - Everybody Wants to Rule the World

172. (8) - S4x04 - Don't Speak

173. (8) - S4x05 - Hopelessly Devoted to You

174. (8) - S4x05 - Everybody Talks

175. (8) - S4x06 - Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee

176. (8) - S4x06 - Greased Lightning

177. (8) - S4x09 - Don't Dream It's Over

178. (8) - S4x10 - Feliz Navidad

179. (8) - S4x10 - White Christmas

180. (8) - S4x11 - No Scrubs

181. (8) - S4x11 - Tell Him

182. (8) - S4x11 - I Don't Know How to Love Him

183. (8) - S4x13 - Nutbush City Limits

184. (8) - S4x14 - Just Can't Get Enough

185. (8) - S4x14 - We've Got Tonite

186. (8) - S4x15 - Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend/Material Girl

187. (8) - S4x16 - How to Be a Heartbreaker

188. (8) - S4x16 - Cold Hearted

189. (8) - S4x17 - Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go

190. (8) - S4x17 - Wannabe

191. (8) - S4x17 - Copacabana

192. (8) - S4x20 - We Will Rock You

193. (8) - S4x20 - At the Ballet

194. (8) - S4x21 - You Are the Sunshine of My Life

195. (8) - S4x22 - I Love It

196. (8) - S5x01 - You've Got to Hide Your Love Away

197. (8) - S5x01 - Got to Get You Into My Life

198. (8) - S5x02 - Get Back

199. (8) - S5x02 - Hey Jude

200. (8) - S5x03 - Seasons of Love

201. (8) - S5x04 - Marry the Night

202. (8) - S5x04 - Applause

203. (8) - S5x06 - Piano Man

204. (8) - S5x07 - Into the Groove

205. (8) - S5x08 - Mary's Little Boy Child

206. (8) - S5x12 - Keep Holding On

207. (8) - S5x14 - You Make Me Feel So Young

208. (8) - S5x14 - Downtown

209. (8) - S5x15 - You Make Me Feel Like a Natural Woman

210. (8) - S5x15 - Broadway Baby

211. (8) - S5x16 - Love Is a Battlefield

212. (8) - S5x17 - Who Are You Now

213. (8) - S5x18 - Story of My Life

214. (8) - S5x20 - All of Me

215. (8) - S5x20 - Girls on Film

216. (8) - S6x02 - Take On Me

217. (8) - S6x02 - Home

218. (8) - S6x03 - It's Too Late

219. (8) - S6x03 - Hand in My Pocket/I Feel the Earth Move

220. (8) - S6x04 - Bitch

221. (8) - S6x07 - You Give Love a Bad Name

222. (8) - S6x11 - Chandelier

223. (8) - S6x12 - I Kissed a Girl

224. (8) - S6x13 - I Lived

225. (7) - S1x01 - Don't Stop Believing (Pilot)

226. (7) - S1x02 - I Say a Little Prayer

227. (7) - S1x07 - Hate On Me

228. (7) - S1x07 - Ride Wit Me

229. (7) - S1x10 - I'll Stand By You

230. (7) - S1x12 - Jump

231. (7) - S1x12 - Smile (Lily Allen)

232. (7) - S1x15 - Like a Virgin

233. (7) - S1x18 - The Boy Is Mine

234. (7) - S1x21 - Another One Bites the Dust

235. (7) - S1x22 - Bohemian Rhapsody

236. (7) - S1x22 - Don't Stop Believing (Regionals)

237. (7) - S2x01 - Empire State of Mind

238. (7) - S2x03 - Losing My Religion

239. (7) - S2x04 - Don't Go Breaking My Heart

240. (7) - S2x06 - Stop! In the Name of Love/Free Your Mind

241. (7) - S2x09 - Hey, Soul Sister

242. (7) - S2x09 - Valerie

243. (7) - S2x12 - When I Get You Alone

244. (7) - S2x12 - Silly Love Songs

245. (7) - S2x14 - Tik Tok

246. (7) - S2x14 - My Headband

247. (7) - S2x15 - Afternoon Delight

248. (7) - S2x16 - Misery

249. (7) - S2x16 - Blackbird

250. (7) - S2x19 - Go Your Own Way

251. (7) - S2x20 - Friday

252. (7) - S2x20 - Isn't She Lovely

253. (7) - S2x21 - Some People

254. (7) - S2x22 - My Cup

255. (7) - S3x01 - Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead

256. (7) - S3x02 - I'm the Greatest Star

257. (7) - S3x05 - Tonight

258. (7) - S3x05 - America

259. (7) - S3x06 - Hit Me with Your Best Shot/One Way or Another

260. (7) - S3x08 - Man in the Mirror

261. (7) - S3x09 - River

262. (7) - S3x09 - My Favorite Things

263. (7) - S3x09 - Blue Christmas

264. (7) - S3x11 - Human Nature

265. (7) - S3x12 - La Isla Bonita

266. (7) - S3x12 - Bamboleo/Hero

267. (7) - S3x13 - Stereo Hearts

268. (7) - S3x13 - Cherish/Cherish

269. (7) - S3x14 - Here's to Us

270. (7) - S3x14 - Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)

271. (7) - S3x14 - Stand

272. (7) - S3x16 - Disco Inferno

273. (7) - S3x18 - The Music of the Night

274. (7) - S3x19 - Dinosaur

275. (7) - S3x19 - Big Girls Don't Cry

276. (7) - S3x19 - Love You Like a Love Song

277. (7) - S3x22 - You Get What You Give

278. (7) - S4x01 - It's Time

279. (7) - S4x01 - Call Me Maybe

280. (7) - S4x01 - Americano/Dance Again

281. (7) - S4x02 - Boys/Boyfriend

282. (7) - S4x03 - The Way You Look Tonight/You're Never Fully Dressed Without a Smile

283. (7) - S4x04 - The Scientist

284. (7) - S4x06 - You're the One That I Want

285. (7) - S4x07 - Heroes

286. (7) - S4x07 - Holding Out for a Hero

287. (7) - S4x08 - Whistle

288. (7) - S4x08 - Live While We're Young

289. (7) - S4x13 - Diva

290. (7) - S4x13 - Make No Mistake (She's Mine)

291. (7) - S4x15 - Old Time Rock & Roll/Danger Zone

292. (7) - S4x16 - Bye Bye Bye/I Want It That Way

293. (7) - S4x22 - Hall of Fame

294. (7) - S5x02 - Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

295. (7) - S5x02 - Revolution

296. (7) - S5x08 - Love Child

297. (7) - S5x09 - Don't Rain On My Parade

298. (7) - S5x10 - The Happening

299. (7) - S5x10 - Don't You (Forget About Me)

300. (7) - S5x13 - Loser Like Me

301. (7) - S5x19 - I Melt with You

302. (7) - S6x06 - They Long to Be Close to You

303. (7) - S6x07 - Somebody Loves You

304. (7) - S6x07 - I Know Where I've Been

305. (7) - S6x09 - Uptown Funk

306. (7) - S6x11 - Take Me to Church

307. (7) - S6x12 - Pony

308. (7) - S6x12 - Popular

309. (6) - S1x01 - Rehab

310. (6) - S1x02 - Push It

311. (6) - S1x02 - Gold Digger

312. (6) - S1x03 - Bust Your Windows

313. (6) - S1x03 - Mercy

314. (6) - S1x05 - Somebody to Love

315. (6) - S1x10 - Lean On Me

316. (6) - S1x11 - Imagine

317. (6) - S1x11 - Bootylicious

318. (6) - S1x13 - You Can't Always Get What You Want

319. (6) - S1x14 - Gives You Hell

320. (6) - S1x16 - Beautiful

321. (6) - S2x01 - Telephone

322. (6) - S2x01 - Billionaire

323. (6) - S2x02 - Stronger

324. (6) - S2x02 - I'm a Slave 4 U

325. (6) - S2x02 - Me Against the Music

326. (6) - S2x02 - Toxic

327. (6) - S2x02 - Baby One More Time

328. (6) - S2x06 - Teenage Dream

329. (6) - S2x13 - Somebody to Love

330. (6) - S2x15 - Do You Wanna Touch Me (Oh Yeah)

331. (6) - S2x16 - Jesus Is My Friend

332. (6) - S2x16 - Trouty Mouth

333. (6) - S2x19 - Dreams

334. (6) - S2x20 - Dancing Queen

335. (6) - S2x21 - Try a Little Tenderness

336. (6) - S2x22 - Light Up the World

337. (6) - S3x01 - It's Not Unusual

338. (6) - S3x04 - Last Friday Night

339. (6) - S3x07 - Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

340. (6) - S3x08 - Control

341. (6) - S3x09 - Santa Claus Is Coming to Town

342. (6) - S3x09 - Extraordinary Merry Christmas

343. (6) - S3x10 - Summer Nights

344. (6) - S3x11 - Scream

345. (6) - S3x15 - I'm Still Standing

346. (6) - S3x19 - Take My Breath Away

347. (6) - S3x21 - Tongue Tied

348. (6) - S3x22 - I'll Remember

349. (6) - S4x02 - Oops!...I Did It Again

350. (6) - S4x04 - Barely Breathing

351. (6) - S4x08 - Come See About Me

352. (6) - S4x11 - Locked Out of Heaven

353. (6) - S4x12 - Centerfold/Hot in Herre

354. (6) - S4x12 - Let Me Love You (Until You Learn to Love Yourself)

355. (6) - S4x12 - A Thousand Years

356. (6) - S4x12 - Torn

357. (6) - S4x13 - Don't Stop Me Now

358. (6) - S4x13 - Girl On Fire

359. (6) - S4x13 - Hung Up

360. (6) - S4x15 - Come What May

361. (6) - S5x01 - I Saw Her Standing There

362. (6) - S5x02 - Let It Be

363. (6) - S5x12 - Raise Your Glass

364. (6) - S5x13 - I Am Changing

365. (6) - S5x15 - Not While I'm Around

366. (6) - S5x17 - Lovefool

367. (6) - S6x05 - It Must Have Been Love

368. (6) - S6x06 - Wishin' And Hoping

369. (6) - S6x07 - All About That Bass

370. (5) - S1x01 - I Kissed a Girl

371. (5) - S1x01 - Leaving On a Jet Plane

372. (5) - S1x07 - You Keep Me Hanging On

373. (5) - S1x07 - Keep Holding On

374. (5) - S1x09 - Proud Mary

375. (5) - S1x09 - Defying Gravity

376. (5) - S1x11 - Hair/Crazy In Love

377. (5) - S1x11 - True Colors

378. (5) - S1x15 - Like a Prayer

379. (5) - S1x16 - One Less Bell to Answer/A House Is Not a Home

380. (5) - S1x21 - It's a Man's Man's Man's World

381. (5) - S2x01 - Every Rose Has Its Thorn

382. (5) - S2x03 - Bridge Over Troubled Water

383. (5) - S2x05 - Touch a Touch a Touch a Touch Me

384. (5) - S2x07 - Conjunction Junction

385. (5) - S2x08 - Ohio

386. (5) - S2x09 - Don't Cry for Me Argentina

387. (5) - S2x09 - (I've Had) The Time of My Life

388. (5) - S2x12 - My Funny Valentine

389. (5) - S2x13 - Baby

390. (5) - S2x16 - Get It Right

391. (5) - S2x16 - Loser Like Me

392. (5) - S2x17 - Turning Tables

393. (5) - S2x19 - Don't Stop

394. (5) - S3x01 - Big Spender

395. (5) - S3x03 - Run the World (Girls)

396. (5) - S3x05 - One Hand, One Heart

397. (5) - S3x08 - Buenos Aires

398. (5) - S3x11 - Bad

399. (5) - S3x16 - How Deep Is Your Love

400. (5) - S3x16 - Boogie Shoes

401. (5) - S4x02 - Womanizer

402. (5) - S4x03 - A Change Would Do You Good

403. (5) - S4x05 - Juke Box Hero

404. (5) - S4x09 - Something Stupid

405. (5) - S4x09 - Being Good Isn't Good Enough

406. (5) - S4x10 - The First Noel

407. (5) - S4x10 - Jingle Bell Rock

408. (5) - S4x11 - Baby Got Back

409. (5) - S4x18 - Your Song

410. (5) - S4x22 - All or Nothing

411. (5) - S5x01 - Help!

412. (5) - S5x01 - A Hard Day's Night

413. (5) - S5x04 - Roar

414. (5) - S5x05 - Wrecking Ball

415. (5) - S5x05 - You Are Woman, I Am Man

416. (5) - S5x05 - If I Were a Boy

417. (5) - S5x14 - Best Day of My Life

418. (5) - S6x01 - Let It Go

419. (5) - S6x01 - Suddenly Seymour

420. (5) - S6x02 - Problem

421. (5) - S6x05 - All Out of Love

422. (5) - S6x05 - My Sharona

423. (5) - S6x06 - I'll Never Fall in Love Again

424. (5) - S6x10 - The Final Countdown

425. (5) - S6x11 - We Built This City

426. (5) - S6x11 - Mickey

427. (5) - S6x12 - Don't Stop Believing (Pilot/2009)

428. (5) - S6x13 - Daydream Believer

429. (5) - S6x13 - This Time

430. (4) - S1x01 - Sit Down You're Rockin the Boat

431. (4) - S1x01 - Can't Fight This Feeling

432. (4) - S1x01 - You're the One That I Want (ver. 1)

433. (4) - S1x01 - Respect

434. (4) - S1x01 - On My Own

435. (4) - S1x04 - Taking Chances

436. (4) - S1x04 - Tonight

437. (4) - S1x08 - I Could Have Danced All Night

438. (4) - S1x08 - Bust A Move

439. (4) - S1x08 - What A Girl Wants

440. (4) - S1x17 - U Can't Touch This

441. (4) - S1x17 - Physical

442. (4) - S2x05 - Sweet Transvestite

443. (4) - S2x07 - Make 'Em Laugh

444. (4) - S2x08 - Just the Way You Are

445. (4) - S2x10 - Last Christmas

446. (4) - S2x20 - Rolling in the Deep

447. (4) - S3x03 - Out Here On My Own

448. (4) - S3x03 - Fix You

449. (4) - S3x07 - Perfect

450. (4) - S3x10 - The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

451. (4) - S3x12 - Sexy and I Know It

452. (4) - S3x21 - Pinball Wizard

453. (4) - S3x22 - Glory Days

454. (4) - S4x06 - Look At Me I'm Sandra Dee (Reprise)

455. (4) - S4x12 - Love Song

456. (4) - S4x17 - Mamma Mia

457. (4) - S5x01 - All You Need Is Love

458. (4) - S5x08 - Here Comes Santa Claus (Down Santa Claus Lane)

459. (4) - S5x08 - Away in a Manger

460. (4) - S5x09 - Every Breath You Take

461. (4) - S5x09 - Brave

462. (4) - S5x13 - Party All the Time

463. (4) - S5x19 - Memory

464. (4) - S6x05 - You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)

465. (4) - S6x06 - Alfie

466. (3) - S1x02 - Take a Bow

467. (3) - S1x05 - Cabaret

468. (3) - S1x08 - Thong Song

469. (3) - S1x17 - Ice Ice Baby

470. (3) - S1x18 - Pink Houses

471. (3) - S2x01 - Getting to Know You

472. (3) - S2x02 - The Only Exception

473. (3) - S2x04 - Lucky

474. (3) - S2x07 - Forget You

475. (3) - S2x08 - Marry You

476. (3) - S2x09 - The Living Years

477. (3) - S2x16 - Candles

478. (3) - S2x22 - I Love New York/New York, New York

479. (3) - S3x02 - Somewhere

480. (3) - S3x04 - Bein' Green

481. (3) - S3x05 - A Boy Like That/I Have a Love

482. (3) - S3x05 - Uptown Girl

483. (3) - S3x10 - Moves Like Jagger/Jumpin' Jack Flash

484. (3) - S3x15 - Up Up Up

485. (3) - S3x17 - Saving All My Love For You

486. (3) - S3x21 - We Are the Champions

487. (3) - S3x21 - Starships

488. (3) - S4x06 - There Are Worse Things I Could Do

489. (3) - S4x09 - O Holy Night

490. (3) - S4x10 - Hanukkah, Oh Hanukkah

491. (3) - S4x19 - Fight for Your Right (to Party)

492. (3) - S4x19 - Next to Me

493. (3) - S5x02 - Here Comes the Sun

494. (3) - S5x12 - Happy

495. (3) - S5x20 - Pompeii

496. (3) - S6x04 - Rock Lobster

497. (3) - S6x04 - Thousand Miles

498. (2) - S1x01 - Mr. Cellophane

499. (2) - S1x07 - No Air

500. (2) - S1x11 - Papa Don't Preach

501. (2) - S1x19 - Safety Dance

502. (2) - S1x19 - I Dreamed a Dream

503. (2) - S1x20 - Beth

504. (2) - S1x20 - Poker Face

505. (2) - S1x20 - Funny Girl

506. (2) - S1x21 - Loser

507. (2) - S1x22 - Over the Rainbow

508. (2) - S2x03 - Papa, Can You Hear Me?

509. (2) - S2x07 - Singing In the Rain/Umbrella

510. (2) - S2x08 - Sway

511. (2) - S2x15 - Landslide

512. (2) - S2x15 - Kiss

513. (2) - S2x22 - Bella Notte

514. (2) - S3x06 - You and I/You and I

515. (2) - S3x10 - Wedding Bell Blues (Bill)

516. (2) - S3x10 - We Found Love

517. (2) - S3x11 - Ben

518. (2) - S3x18 - School's Out

519. (2) - S3x22 - Forever Young

520. (2) - S4x19 - You Have More Friends Than You Know

521. (2) - S4x19 - Don't Stop Believin' (Rachel)

522. (2) - S5x18 - The Rose

523. (2) - S5x19 - Lucky Star

524. (2) - S6x04 - Whip It

525. (1) - S1x03 - I Wanna Sex You Up

526. (1) - S1x10 - (You're Having My Baby)

527. (1) - S2x12 - Firework

528. (1) - S2x13 - Sing

529. (1) - S3x09 - Do They Know It's Christmas?

530. (1) - S3x12 - A Little Less Conversation

531. (1) - S3x13 - You're the Top

532. (1) - S3x18 - The Rain in Spain

533. (1) - S4x08 - Gangnam Style

534. (1) - S5x05 - Blurred Lines

535. (1) - S5x07 - The Fox

536. (1) - S5x08 - The Chipmunk Song (Christmas Don't Be Late)

537. (1) - S6x07 - Same Love

538. (1) - S6x09 - Friday I'm in Love

539. (NA) - S1x05 - Alone

540. (NA) - S1x10 - Endless Love

541. (NA) - S1x11 - Don't Make Me Over

542. (NA) - S1x12 - Smile (Charlie Chaplin)

543. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello, Goodbye

544. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello

545. (NA) - S1x14 - Hello Twelve, Hello Thirteen, Hello Love

546. (NA) - S1x15 - Express Yourself

547. (NA) - S1x15 - Borderline/Open Your Heart

548. (NA) - S1x15 - Burning Up

549. (NA) - S1x16 - Fire

550. (NA) - S1x16 - A House Is Not a Home

551. (NA) - S1x18 - One

552. (NA) - S1x20 - Shout It Out Loud

553. (NA) - S1x21 - Tell Me Something Good

554. (NA) - S1x22 - To Sir, With Love

555. (NA) - S2x01 - What I Did for Love

556. (NA) - S2x03 - One of Us

557. (NA) - S2x04 - With You I'm Born Again

558. (NA) - S2x05 - Planet, Schmanet, Janet

559. (NA) - S2x10 - You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch

560. (NA) - S2x10 - We Need a Little Christmas

561. (NA) - S2x10 - The Most Wonderful Day of the Year

562. (NA) - S2x10 - Welcome Christmas

563. (NA) - S2x10 - Merry Christmas, Darling

564. (NA) - S2x11 - Thriller/Heads Will Roll

565. (NA) - S2x11 - She's Not There

566. (NA) - S2x11 - Need You Now

567. (NA) - S2x13 - This Little Light of Mine

568. (NA) - S2x17 - Ain't No Way

569. (NA) - S2x17 - All By Myself

570. (NA) - S2x19 - Never Going Back Again

571. (NA) - S2x19 - I Don't Want to Know

572. (NA) - S2x19 - Songbird

573. (NA) - S2x19 - Nice to Meet You, Have I Slept with You?

574. (NA) - S2x22 - Yeah!

575. (NA) - S2x22 - Pretending

576. (NA) - S2x22 - As Long as You're There

577. (NA) - S2x22 - Still Got Tonight

578. (NA) - S3x01 - Anything Goes/Anything You Can Do

579. (NA) - S3x04 - Waiting for a Girl Like You

580. (NA) - S3x07 - I'm the Only One

581. (NA) - S3x10 - Without You

582. (NA) - S3x11 - I Just Can't Stop Loving You

583. (NA) - S3x13 - Let Me Love You

584. (NA) - S3x13 - Chapel of Love

585. (NA) - S3x13 - Home

586. (NA) - S3x18 - Cry

587. (NA) - S3x20 - I Won't Give Up

588. (NA) - S3x20 - Flashdance...What a Feeling

589. (NA) - S3x20 - Because You Loved Me

590. (NA) - S4x01 - Sister Christian

591. (NA) - S4x01 - Never Say Never

592. (NA) - S4x02 - Gimme More

593. (NA) - S4x02 - Everytime

594. (NA) - S4x02 - Crazy/U Drive Me Crazy

595. (NA) - S4x05 - Blow Me (One Last Kiss)

596. (NA) - S4x05 - Born to Hand Jive

597. (NA) - S4x07 - My Dark Side

598. (NA) - S4x07 - Superman

599. (NA) - S4x07 - Some Nights

600. (NA) - S4x08 - Home/Homeward Bound

601. (NA) - S4x10 - Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas

602. (NA) - S4x11 - I Only Have Eyes for You

603. (NA) - S4x12 - This Is the New Year

604. (NA) - S4x14 - You're All I Need to Get By

605. (NA) - S4x14 - Anything Could Happen

606. (NA) - S4x15 - Shout

607. (NA) - S4x15 - You're All the World to Me

608. (NA) - S4x15 - Unchained Melody

609. (NA) - S4x15 - Footloose

610. (NA) - S4x15 - In Your Eyes

611. (NA) - S4x16 - I Still Believe/Super Bass

612. (NA) - S4x16 - Closer

613. (NA) - S4x16 - The Bitch Is Back/Dress You Up

614. (NA) - S4x17 - My Prerogative

615. (NA) - S4x17 - Creep

616. (NA) - S4x18 - Say

617. (NA) - S4x18 - More Than Words

618. (NA) - S4x19 - Outcast

619. (NA) - S4x20 - Longest Time

620. (NA) - S4x20 - Everybody Hurts

621. (NA) - S4x20 - You've Lost That Lovin' Feelin'

622. (NA) - S4x20 - Little Girls

623. (NA) - S4x21 - Uptight (Everything's Alright)

624. (NA) - S4x21 - I Wish

625. (NA) - S4x21 - Higher Ground

626. (NA) - S4x21 - Superstition

627. (NA) - S4x22 - Clarity

628. (NA) - S4x22 - Wings

629. (NA) - S4x22 - To Love You More

630. (NA) - S4x22 - Rainbow Connection

631. (NA) - S5x01 - Drive My Car

632. (NA) - S5x01 - Yesterday

633. (NA) - S5x02 - Something

634. (NA) - S5x03 - Fire and Rain

635. (NA) - S5x03 - No Surrender

636. (NA) - S5x04 - Wide Awake

637. (NA) - S5x05 - On Our Way

638. (NA) - S5x06 - Honesty

639. (NA) - S5x06 - My Life

640. (NA) - S5x06 - Just the Way You Are

641. (NA) - S5x06 - You May Be Right

642. (NA) - S5x06 - An Innocent Man

643. (NA) - S5x07 - You're My Best Friend

644. (NA) - S5x07 - Nasty/Rhythm Nation

645. (NA) - S5x07 - Cheek to Cheek

646. (NA) - S5x08 - Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree

647. (NA) - S5x08 - O Christmas Tree

648. (NA) - S5x09 - Whenever I Call You Friend

649. (NA) - S5x09 - My Lovin' (You're Never Gonna Get It)

650. (NA) - S5x09 - Breakaway

651. (NA) - S5x10 - Hold On

652. (NA) - S5x10 - Barracuda

653. (NA) - S5x10 - Jumpin' Jumpin'

654. (NA) - S5x10 - Danny's Song

655. (NA) - S5x11 - Vacation

656. (NA) - S5x11 - America

657. (NA) - S5x11 - More Than a Feeling

658. (NA) - S5x11 - I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

659. (NA) - S5x11 - Mr. Roboto/Counting Stars

660. (NA) - S5x11 - I Love LA

661. (NA) - S5x13 - Just Give Me a Reason

662. (NA) - S5x13 - Be Okay

663. (NA) - S5x14 - People

664. (NA) - S5x15 - No One Is Alone

665. (NA) - S5x16 - Addicted to Love

666. (NA) - S5x16 - I Want to Know What Love Is

667. (NA) - S5x16 - Let's Wait Awhile

668. (NA) - S5x17 - NYC

669. (NA) - S5x18 - Piece of My Heart

670. (NA) - S5x18 - Wake Me Up

671. (NA) - S5x19 - Werewolves of London

672. (NA) - S5x19 - Take Me Home Tonight

673. (NA) - S5x20 - No Time At All

674. (NA) - S5x20 - Glitter in the Air

675. (NA) - S6x01 - Sing

676. (NA) - S6x01 - Dance the Night Away

677. (NA) - S6x01 - Uninvited

678. (NA) - S6x02 - Viva Voce

679. (NA) - S6x03 - Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow/Head Over Feet

680. (NA) - S6x03 - You Learn/You've Got a Friend

681. (NA) - S6x03 - So Far Away

682. (NA) - S6x05 - Father Figure

683. (NA) - S6x06 - Arthur's Theme

684. (NA) - S6x06 - Baby It's You

685. (NA) - S6x06 - What the World Needs Now

686. (NA) - S6x06 - Promises, Promises

687. (NA) - S6x07 - Time After Time

688. (NA) - S6x08 - Hey Ya!

689. (NA) - S6x08 - Our Day Will Come

690. (NA) - S6x08 - I'm So Excited

691. (NA) - S6x08 - At Last

692. (NA) - S6x09 - Break Free

693. (NA) - S6x09 - Lose My Breath

694. (NA) - S6x10 - Far From Over

695. (NA) - S6x10 - Rather Be

696. (NA) - S6x10 - Rise

697. (NA) - S6x10 - The Trolley Song

698. (NA) - S6x11 - Come Sail Away

699. (NA) - S6x11 - Listen to Your Heart

700. (NA) - S6x12 - I'm His Child

701. (NA) - S6x13 - Someday We'll Be Together

702. (NA) - S6x13 - Teach Your Children

[revchainsaw]

Bumblebee (2018)

Good Evening worshippers, and welcome! Today the Cult of Cult goes a little more mainstream than usual. It's been a while since i've tackled a big Hollywood superhero film. But I do believe that these sorts of films will be remembered fondly my small groups of people in the future, especially the smaller films that are being overshadowed by the big bad MCU, films like 2018s Bumblebee.

The Messsage

Bumblebee was originally released as a prequel to the Transformers franchise that had started all the way back in 2007. However, reboots had really hit the market as a way to breath new life into struggling franchises, and the Transformers series had already gone to just about every absurd extreme you could imagine. No changes were made to the movie as it was released, but with it's more childish and heartfelt tone, and a new aesthetic that was softer, smoother, and all around just generally more pleasing to the eye, I think it was a wise choice to rebrand Bumblebee as a new beginning.

Our story is of two friends from two very different worlds and how they came together. Our first character is Bumblebee, then known as B- number sign/it doesn't really matter. Not yet Bumblebee is a soldier set with securing a safe location for the Autobots to regroup and make their home as they suffer a pretty serious defeat on cybertron at the hands of the tyrannical Decepticons. Optimus Prime, here again voiced by Peter Cullen and looking so much more like himself, assigns this task to Bumblebee promising him that they will meet him there when the time comes. Then Optimus fucks off for the rest of the run time making way for our little hero.

Bumblebee lands on Earth and is immediately set upon by John Cena and his military goon squad. It probably would have been wise for Bumblebee to avoid John Cena but in his defense, he couldn't see him. Hardy har har. In his attempt to flee his voice box is damaged, he seeks sanctuary by taking the form of a run down little VW bug, and suffers from amnesia.

Then we have Charlie. Charlie is not like other girls. She likes cars, all the retro music, which wasn't retro when the movie takes place, so I'm supposed to just think she's a rocker but it kinda seems like she'll listen to just about anything. I think in 2018 liking Motorhead and The Smiths (who are used ad nauseum in this movie) is perfectly common, but I feel like in the 80s that was a much different and much older attitude to take.

Anyway Charlie's poor family lives in a super fucking nice house and are poor because the dialogue keeps insisting they are so it must be true despite all the shit they have that actually poor people would sell blood and teeth to attain, but hell, this is Hollywood and Hollywood poor is like regular people upper middle class. Charlies family is so poor that instead of giving her a one time graduation/birthday present to buy a part for a car she already has, they just give her a moped, She also spends all her time at a pull apart where the manager (who might be her uncle that wasn't super clear) is willing to just give her a Volkswagen so I don't understand why she didn't already have the project car up and running. Whatever, it's a plot contrivance. All you need to know is that Charlie is tenacious and hard around the edges cuz her dad is dead and she's not yet mature enough to process that in a healthy way. Maybe her character arch will teach her to let others in, we'll have to find out.

There's also a wacky nerd named Memo, and some bad guys, and John Cena. They are all also pretty archetypal and contrived and don't really do anything of note that isn't just filling a beat that this kind of movie needs to walk. Charlie starts Bumblebee up, discovers he's a robot and the two begin to bond. Charlie learns to make a friend, and bumblebee is learning about himself. They get into hijinks and get revenge on a bully girl who makes Regina George look like a saint, she pretty much only picks on Charlie exclusively for having a dead dad.

The moment Bumblebee is woken back up, some technology goof em up that both he and Charlie are unaware of brings two Decepticon baddies into the picture. I don't remember their names, but since I love The Venture Brothers let's say they can be "Jet Boy and Jet Girl". Jet Boy and Jet Girl are sometimes cars, sometimes various flying military vehicles, and they make friends with the deep state and plan to get all the adrenochrome from all the orphans, or just to go find Bumblebee and beat his ass good cuz their bad guys. Let me tell y'all though, Jet Boy and Jet Girl are so bad that they don't even care that the government is listening when they reveal that they are planning on bringing a Decepticon Invasion and after they rough up Bumblebee real good they are going to destroy all life on this planet. So they start by killing a military scientist.

John Cena is after Bumblebee and he's homies with Jet Boy and Jet Girl until the military scientist butt dials him and he hears the evil plan. John Cena goes from heel to face and helps Bumblebee and Charlie save the day. It's a giant CG clusterfuck climax a la any superhero film in the last 10 years and I basically stopped watching. BumbleBee pulls a Hellraiser on Jet Boy, and then he hits Jet Girl with a freaking boat. Charlie uses her diving skills do dive down and save him, but he's a Giant Robot and he was okay and it was literally pointless for her to to except as a way to show that her character has completed her arch by doing the thing that was representative of her connection with her lost father.

Bumblebee turns into the Camaro from the first movie, meets up with Optimus prime, and the stage is set for this prequel to squeeze more prequels out. So it wasn't very creative, but was it bad? Let's find out.

Please Stand to receive the Benediction.

Best Aspect: Transform the Franchise

Bumblebee was directed by Travis Knight of Laika fame and it shows. This movie marks a stylistic change in the transformers franchise, as in it doesn't look like utter dog shit, but it also represents in many ways a tonal shift. It does hold on to a lot of gross sleaze that has unfortunately been forcibly jammed into the DNA of the franchise but it also attempts to be a more heartfelt entry. The characters of Bumblebee might all be sort of a waste of time, but at least they are doing something with emotions, even if the emotions of the characters are only explored as deeply as a children's cartoon I'm glad they are there. In the previous installments the only thing the characters did between running from action piece to seizure inducing action piece was drool over underage girls like a bunch of chimpanzees at the facility where they test experimental E.D. meds. It was nice to see that at least somewhat tampered. This transformers movie feels more like it's for kids and young teenagers, and strangely that more friendly tone makes for a much less juvenile product.

Worst Aspect: Remember I Love the 80s from the 2000s

I hope you really like Stranger Things. I do, but because Stranger Things was so successful it' s going to be everywhere. Not true Stranger Things just 80s nostalgia porn. This 80s nostalgia is going to be forced on you whether you like it or not, and it's not going to be fun. It's gonna be in your shows, in your music, in your Sunday like Bacon in 2010. It's that or Marvel Franchise Brand Whedonisms. Bumblebee is that brave movie that says, "Why not both?" It would seem fitting that a property as quintessentially 80s as Transformers should feel completely comfortable doing a period piece set in the 80's but it's so fucking half hearted it's depressing. It wasn't done to appreciate the roots of the IP, it was done to cash in on a trend and it feels it. All they did was throw up a date and insufferably force an 80s soundtrack down your throat as if that was enough to convince you that this movie needed to be set during this time. Other than that you could have told me this film was set in 2007 and I couldn't tell you any different.

Best Character: Charlie's an Angel

I liked Charlie. Sure her Arc is predictable, her taste is dumb, and she isn't exactly a master of her own destiny to any degree. But at least she is a woman in a transformers movie who's got something going on. Sure she's defined entirely by grief, but that sure is better than pretending that being able to work on cars is a feminist character trait instead of a weird fetish thing. They certainly do that thing with Charlie, but at least it's not the only thing they throw at the wall. Bumblebee is by no means out of the woods in this department, but it garners a lot of goodwill for trying. Like a racist uncle who just started his journey out of ignorance, but hasn't yet realized he has to stop asking mortifying questions to the barista at Starbucks. Okay, maybe that's an extreme metaphor. I'm saying that perhaps Charlie is not a great character but she's a great character for a Transfomers movie.

Worst Character: It's JOOOOHHHNNNN CEEEENA!!!!

Why is John Cena in this movie? I don't hate the guy, but his character seems pointless. You could remove him from the movie completely and replace him with any one of the random military goons at any point and it changes nothing. What was with that dumb salute at the end? It seems like they put him in this movie in post and it was just to pump up cast list. I wish he was given anything to work with. I can't remember his characters name, and it's not like John Cena did a bad job, I was just annoyed every time they kept giving him hero shots. I felt like I was watching a trailer for a different movie.

Best Actor: Optimal Primo!

Every time Peter Cullen speaks I want to listen. There's a reason they haven't had Chris Pratt or somebody with a bigger name come in and take over the role at this point. He's why the audience keep coming back. Peter Cullen IS Optimus Prime, and there's no changing that. He also wins twice. He's the best actor in the movie AND he's barely in the movie. Good call Peter.

Worst Actor: Mean Girls 2, Meaner and Girlier

I don't want to be cruel so I'm not going to go into to much detail, but there's an actress in this film who's performance is so mustache twirlingly evil and stupid that it ruined my suspension of disbelief when i knew going in that i was about to endure a 2 hour toy commercial about robots that turn into cars. Beldar Conehead was a more convincing human being than Tina.

Best Effect: Goo Be Gone

I really appreciated when the bad guys shot the government nerd into a blast of snot. That was pretty fun for me. Best part of the movie hands down.

Worst Effect: Live Action?

Bumblebee is a cartoon. It's a great looking cartoon but it doesn't sell itself that way. If we were doing a Roger Rabbit thing I'd have no gripes. However, I think CG is just getting worse. I'm criticizing this and it's still lightyears better than the previous entry's on the franchise. No transformation or fight sequence in Bumble Bee had me straining to make sense of what I was looking at. I think it was a great idea to start using some basic shapes and outlines to these characters, and return somewhat to their 80s designs. But at certain points, especially when there were no humans in the shot, i was pretty convinced I was watching Clone Wars. There may not be anyway around this, as the Transformers concept might not be able to be pulled off in any more effective manner. It's a minor gripe, but I just didn't think it looked like anything other than a very expensive cartoon, and in this franchise that's a compliment, because it least it looked like SOMETHING!

Best Scene: Space Opera

I am not a Transformers fan. I missed the boat on the cartoon as a kid. I would sometimes catch it at friends houses but I was more into Batman, Star Wars, and Ninja Turtles. By the time I came onto the scene the world had moved on to Beast Wars. I did one day arbitrarily decide that my favorite Transformer was Sound Wave. He looked great in this. I am a big fan of the return to form with a lot of the character designs in this. They really did keep the things that worked from the other adaptations, and they are steadily removing the things that didn't. For this reason, the scenes on Cybertron, particularly the battle with Soundwave (i prefer for personal reasons) looked great and were exciting to watch. I remember thinking Cybertron used to look like a Marilyn Manson shot a music video from inside to dumpster. This is so much better.

Worst Scene: Blocking the Box

There's a scene in Bumblebee where Charlie's family decides the best way to save their daughter was to cause a pile up of vehicles in an intersection, and it's pure contrived writing that saved any character in that sequence from being killed in a horrific traffic accident. It was stupid, played for laughs, and it wasn't exciting as much as it was anxiety inducing. I also thought that there was no reason the covert military group covering up extraterrestrial life wouldn't just disappear this family of fucking morons in their little piece of shit car. The logic of the scene was just so childish like, "No they won't hit me, I'm a good person."

Summary

Bumblebee may be remembered fondly in a decade. I think especially if the Transformers franchise were to end here. It didn't get the publicity of the other films, and that really is a shame. For my money, this was the best Transformers movie so far. I was very tempted to give Bumblebee a C, it does just enough to right what was wrong from the other movies to make me appreciate all that work. This movie has heart, and if you are at all into Transformers then l think you should see it. It's still pretty stupid, and pretty basic. It's not offering anything new to the genre, and it feels like a commercial for more movies. I really wish we could just get movies that want to tell a story. I thought it over and decided that it wasn't fair not to grade Bumblebee on it's own merits. Bumblebee is substantially better than the films that preceded it, but that's not saying a lot, when the films that preceded it are joyless exercises in self abuse.

Overall Grade: D

[magpiemorality]

Baby Makes Three, Intruality Parents 9

Virgil Makes A Friend

A little skip forwards after the previous part, where Virgil is now roughly two years old! 

Warnings: worms, referenced Covid-19 (quarantining only)

First | Previous | AO3

***

When twenty-twenty rears its ugly head the little family are both glad and not that they’d moved just in time. They’re far from the rest of Patton’s family, but they have a house and a garden and a big enough spare room to convert into a workspace while things are up in the air. 

The sunshine helps them both to see the positives, and Remus in particular is delighted by how much time he can spend with Virgil day to day. Just having him nearby always makes the adult smile, and he’s genuinely more productive with his regular short breaks to hang out with his tiny son. 

Patton on the other hand, isn’t doing so well. He’s always been the sort to struggle with world news, and Remus has had to turn the radio or tv off more than once when he finds his partner sat, brow pinched and chewing on his fingernails. In a last ditch effort to try and help Patton out Remus suggests they start trying to turn their little patch of grass into a proper garden. If nothing else it’ll be a good investment into the future, right?

So they order some supplies, message Virgil’s daycare parents group to get hold of any seedlings and cuttings they can, and set to work. 

It’s awesome. 

Even Virgil gets involved. 

“Baby no!” Patton squeaks, rushing over (again) to stop Virgil putting a handful of new earth into his mouth. He seems to have come to the conclusion that it’s probably chocolate, which is his absolute favourite thing, and Patton is considering finding a bin to put the stuff in so it can be locked away. 

Remus mostly just laughs. “He’ll be stronger for it, Pat!” He chuckles, covered in stains and mud himself, all the more so after hefting Virgil up onto his shoulders. Patton winces as the boy kicks his dirty rain boots against Remus’ chest but his partner doesn’t seem to mind, introducing Virgil to the new trellis attached to the garden fence for the sweet-pea to grow up. “It’s probably good for his immune system, you know?”

“Sure but not like, a whole handful at a time,” Patton sighs, the protest weak as he gets distracted as always by the wave of adoration he feels for these two boys. He smiles dreamily to himself as he turns back to the buddleja he’s been trying to plant. 

The afternoon is peaceful enough, serene with the lack of cars or planes to ruin the stillness. Every so often there’s the sound of someone else out in their own backyard, and distantly they can hear a saw going. Patton is unashamed to say that this sort of life is his idea of heaven; being a homebody with his perfect family, making a home and tending to it outside and in. He hums a soft tune to underscore the sounds of Remus putting their new furniture together by hand (and sometimes quietly swearing, or muttering how much he needed to invest in some proper powertools), until a little hand tugs on his shorts.  

Virgil is stood by his hip when he turns, and Patton gets just a moment’s warning from the kid’s shout of “Look!” before a grubby hand and a rather fat worm are shoved under his nose. 

He doesn’t yelp and fall back in surprise, because he’s been a parent now for almost two years and that response has been thoroughly drilled out of him. But his eyes do widen, and his nose flares as he fights the instinctive expression of disgust. Patton has nothing against worms! Honest! He just... thinks they’re pretty gross. But Virgil, like his father, has a healthy amount of respect for all things icky in nature, and he gasps as it wriggles around in his hand. 

Patton sees his fingers start to close reflexively and catches them gently. “No sweetheart, don’t close your hand. You don’t want it to get squished! Keep it flat, just like that, but put the other one here, see? So it can move around a bit more.” He helps Virgil cup his hands together as the worm starts to meander across the provided surface, looking for earth to burrow into. Virgil giggles when it probes between his fingers, looking up for guidance. 

“‘S’a worm!” He chirps, holding it up again though Patton has definitely seen it. “Um, daddy?” 

“Yes baby?” Patton’s heart skips a beat at the serious little frown on Virgil’s face as he thinks hard about something.

“What now?”

Right. The worm is definitely working on an escape plan and, though Virgil (and probably also Remus) might object; they can’t keep this poor thing as a pet forever. 

Patton shuffles round on his knees, putting his tools down properly to devote his attention to the situation at hand. “Hm, okay. We need to let it go home I think.”

“No!” Virgil gasps, but he remembers his instruction not to close his hands well enough to not clutch the worm to his chest like he clearly wants to do. “My worm, daddy!”

“Darling, we have to be nice to mr worm. He had a nice time with you but he has to go back home now, so he can go to his bed and have his dinner-” Patton is lying through his teeth but that’s parenthood and it softens Virgil’s stubborn pout. “-So we can help him do that. Where did you find him?” 

Virgil leads him over to the corner where Remus had excavated a bunch of roots to put a little miniature pear tree. The soil looks fresh still, and Patton can see the signs of where two little eager sets of fingers scrabbled through the dirt like a tiny budding archaeologist. Virgil points the same spot out- careful not to drop the worm- and looks up at him again for help. 

“Okay, why don’t you put him down in the same place? He’s really good at digging, you can watch him for a bit if you want, but you’re not allowed to pick him up again, okay baby?” 

“Yes,” Virgil nods solemnly, doing his careful knees-to-butt fall that leaves him sat comfortably by the dirt. He puts his hands on the earth and looks at Patton when the worm doesn’t magically race off them to freedom. The adult stifles a fond laugh and demonstrates, cupping his hands and slowly pulling them apart, and Virgil squeals in delight when it works, leaving the earthworm wriggling on the ground. 

Patton can’t help it, he has to bend down to give Virgil a squeeze and kiss the top of his very earthy-scented hair (bath time will be fun tonight...) and then leaves him to his intent vigil as the worm slowly digs its way underground. 

Virgil tells the story for the next three days straight, getting up early in the mornings and jumping on the bed until one of them begrudgingly makes him breakfast and gets him dressed so he can go and sit outside and search for more worms, only to return them all gently to where he’d plucked them from after a quick tour around the garden, parroting the names of the plants in the tone, at least, that his fathers use, if not the exact correct words. 

It’s painfully adorable. 

And it is absolutely the reason why Remus turns to Patton in bed one night with that look on his face that spells mischief, and says, “You know, I always wanted a dog...”