#glad i paused for a few weeks to work on far out (which is also looking super good. i love jane and galactica. theyre so funny)

[syrupyyyart]

Biggest folley of Motley and why it got so difficult for me to write was because I kept getting so caught up on trying to represent every aspect of their stories all at once anytime there were on screen, when really I need to remember that they are in fact Just Little Guys

[beautifulfuckup99]

Request is simple

Alpha JK * Chubby Girl 🫠

Babes, you know I got you! Gonna make this a bit of a part 2 to "I Can Handle It", which has reached 390 hearts so far. I'm so glad ya'll enjoyed it! Lol

Title: A Little Reminder...

Warning(s): SMUT! (Obviously), Body image issues, pregnancy S!X, And, yes, fluff too! Lol

Author's Note: This is for my beautiful Big/Curvy Girls. Love ya'll!

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Jungkook's POV:

My phone rang out as I waited for the light to turn green. I looked down at my phone expecting to see my wife calling, but it wasn't her number. I picked up the call and put the phone on speaker so I could talk without getting a ticket for it.

"Hello?" I asked and quickly heard a sigh of relief come from the other side.

"Finally. What the hell are you doing out there?" Namjoon's deep voice came out in an angry tone, and I fought the urge to roll my eyes at the conversation I know he'll be having with me soon. Even on hiatuses, he was still my Hyung...

"Joon please, I have enough people mad at me for tonight." I muttered softly, hoping for some mercy after the week I've been dragged through.

"Well, someone's gotta figure out where your damn head is at. Y/N says you're cheating on her?" He asks and I want to yell out. 'I'M NOT CHEATING!', but I hold in the frustration. Married. Married, living together, and expecting our first child, and Y/N's insecurities had found a way right back to us.

"She called me crying after you walked out tonight? Didn't I teach you to never leave just leave a fight unresolved?" He lectures and I hit my forehead on the steering wheel before looking back at the road as I drive around the city streets of Soeul. "She said you never touch her and that-" I finally cut Namjoon off from his worried rant.

"I know what she said! I hear it all the damn time. That's why I left. I'm sick and tired of her always accusing me of looking at different women when we're out together or saying that she's not attractive anymore. She's having my child, Joon! We're married for crying out loud! What more should I do to prove I'm not going anywhere?" I asked in pure exhaustion. I'd even taken this break for her, and it seems like nothing was working. This was honestly worse than when we were dating. I hear my Hyung sigh before he begins speaking again.

"You need to understand that she's very sensitive right now, Jungkook. Any and every little thing will find a way to set her off. Especially since you guys haven't been doing much-" I cut him off again.

"That's none of your business." I say fast and then pause. "I-I'm sorry, Joon..." I sigh, just angry that Y/N would even tell him all of this. He hums.

"Jungkook. Y/N said that she believes the reason you won't touch her is because you think she's getting fat." He says, and I huff in annoyance as I stop at another red light.

"Joon..." I whispered while shaking my head. "I still, and will always, look at Y/N like I did the night we met. I've told her how much I love her body!" I try and defend. Namjoon hums again.

"But her body has changed, Jungkook." He points out. "Have you given her a reminder?" He asks and I nod my head before realizing that he can't see me.

"Not a day has gone by where I didn't tell her that..." I stated before remembering the last few weeks. "I... Well, I mean... Work has been busy lately... And... Shit!" I groaned as I hit my head on the steering wheel again before quickly focusing back on the road.

"'Shit' is right." Namjoon sighs. "You know what you've gotta do now right?" He asks and I stay silent, secretly needing this advice. Even as a grown man with a kid on the way, I knew I'll always need the insight of my Hyung.

"You gotta go home and remind your wife why you wanted a ring on that finger." He stats and I chuckle softly before sighing and pulling over on some random street.

"You're right. I gotta go. Thanks, Hyung." I mumbled and heard Namjoon say a small 'goodnight' and also 'good luck' before hanging up.

I had to make this up to my wife, and fast.

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I get home just as the clock shows 2:30am, but I'm not tired at all. I close the door behind me and hear the stairs creak a bit as someone comes downstairs. Turning around, I see my beautiful wife standing at the bottom of the staircase, hands crossed over her chest as she bit the corner of her bottom lip as if waiting for the right words to come to mind... So was I.

I had everything I was gonna say ready in the back of my mind, yet now, seeing her there with her hair a mess, her cute little nose red, and her gorgeous eyes puffy, all from crying... I just felt shame for even putting her through this.

"Baby..." I begin as I started walking over to her, flowers in hand, her favorite. "I am so sorry for everything-" She cuts me off with a shake of her head.

"No... I-It's my fault." She states. "I should've known that you would never cheat on me and I'm sorry I accused you. I-It's just everyone talking about you having 'so much chemistry' with that actress in your new music video... I-I guess I just kinda... Kinda lost it." She whispers with her head going down in shame.

I open my mouth to speak again but my voice gets caught in my throat. What good are words at a point like this? I walk over to my wife and grab her chin, tilting her head up to look at me. "I want you Y/N..." I whisper as I look her in the eyes. She pauses and I grab her by the waist, pulling her against me, her curves working as amazing place holders for my arms.

"You don't have to-" I cut her off by picking her up bridal style so I could take her up the stairs to our bedroom.

"I thought I told you back when we were dating. I can handle you just fine. I think you need a little reminder." I whisper in her ear.

As soon as we get through the doorway of the bedroom, I pinned her up against the first wall I could. I didn't mean to be rough with her, but it's been so long since we've even made out... Lust clouded my mind when she moaned into the kiss because of the sting my hand had just left on her plump ass. I kissed her, my tongue shooting into her mouth so I could taste her for the first-time in... I don't know how long.

I pushed her up against the wall harder as my hands reached down to her legs so she could get the hint to jump up and wrap them around me. My hands went to the hem of my shirt she'd been wearing, basically ripping it off of her. I moved away to get a better look at her and moaned. She was wearing red lace. "You were prepared." I pant and she blushes. "I don't know what you're talking about..." She taunts quietly. I put her down to get a better view of her and her body.

Her gorgeous body...

With a spin of my index finger, I motioned for her to turn for me. She slowly and hesitantly did. She turned her back towards me and I slowly grabbed her hips and squeezed. Fuck, I love this view the most...

"I'd be insane to get tired of a body like this." I whisper in her ear, causing her to turn to look at me from over her shoulder. Her bright eyes made my heart flutter like always.

"You mean that?" She whispers softly, as if challenging my sweet words. Our relationship was always a tug of war, and I loved it. She always kept me on my toes, kept me sharp. I smile before cupping her face, the pad of my thumb stroking her cheek.

"With every fiber in my being." I whisper back before leaning in to kiss her, this time more slowly. Our lips move like butter on a hot pan, the motion is slow and consistent, her tongue licking at my lower lip makes me shiver. I pull away from her lips though as my hands pull her closer to my body.

"How did I get so lucky?" I ask as I eye her, and Y/N blushes slightly, thrusting her butt against me to bump me away a bit before turning fully towards me.

"You make it sound like I'm some goddess..." She tries to taunt but I notice how little sarcasm is in her voice, like now she truly believes that she isn't. It makes an anger spark inside me that is quickly replaced with a need to make her believe me.

"Y/N..." I whisper as I make her look at me. "You are a goddess." I state.

"No, I'm not..." She begins, but I lean in and kiss her again. She puts her hands on my shoulders to probably push me back, but I know what she likes. My lips wrap around her bottom lip to suck on softly, my arms wrapping around her waist to hold her as close as her stomach would let me.

As we make out, my hands move to grip her ass, loving the feel of it in my hands. I loved the feel of her cellulite, the stretch marks, how soft it felt when I squeezed. Like dough. I especially loved the noise it made when I...

Smack!

Y/n gasps against my mouth as I rub the ass cheek I'd just smacked. "Get on the bed. I fucking missed this body." I whisper, tonguing my lip ring as I eye her bashful state. She was always so cute...

"Jungkook-" I cut her off.

"Don't 'Jungkook' me. This is what you wanted, right? Why you've been so fussy? It's cause I haven't been giving it to you lately. I'm gonna make up for that right now." I say as I grab her chin firmly, loving how she breathes unevenly at the promise. "Now get on the fucking bed." I order, not in a mood to repeat myself. Not when all I wanted was her withering under me...

Y/N is quick to get on the bed and I drop my jacket finally before walking over while undoing my belt. I yank it off and use it on her wrists, not needing her hands wondering. "Let me take care of this body." I smirk as my hands roam her half naked body now.

I grope her breasts as she gently moans and it's music to my ears. I kiss the tops of her breasts as I squeeze them. Her back aches so I can reach behind her and take her bra off. I slip her bra off of her perfect body and take time to really look at her again. Her hair's a mess, her cheeks are flushed, and she's never looked better. 

"I am so fucking lucky." I begin. "I get to wake up next to you every morning," I kiss the middle of her chest. "Come home to you every afternoon," I kiss down her stomach. "And make love to you every night. I'm in heaven..." I whispered softly before I pull her underwear all the way off and throw it over my shoulder, not caring where it lands. I spread her legs and get comfy between them.

I focus on her inner thighs, wanting to mark them up, biting and leaving hickeys on her perfect skin. "P-Please... Kookie, please!" Y/N begs in need, and it makes me smirk. Being pregnant made her more sensitive. She was practically leaking on the bed already. My breath brushes over her soaked pussy as I tease her more.

"You want it? Hm?" I taunt quietly as she shivers. I smirk and move to face her. "You know what I wanna hear." I say.

"I-I'm a pretty girl..." She whimpers softly. "Please. Please give it to me..." She whines softly. I hum and cup her pussy in one hand, rubbing my palm against her clit. It makes her moan louder and makes me smirk.

"Fuck, you're so wet, I can hear it..." I say happily as I slide two fingers into her at once cause I know she can take it. And she does. She always takes my fingers so easily. Almost as easy as she takes my cock...

"Oh my god..." She whines as her hips hump against my hand. I move to lay next to her as I focus on finger fucking her, eyes almost rolling every time her walls milked my fingers.

"Look at me. Look at me." I order between pants, and her eyes are half shut as she does, forcing herself to stay focused and not lose it to the pleasure yet. "My pretty girl. You like it?" I whisper against her lips, her hands moving against the belt tied around her wrists.

"Yes! Yes! Please, faster. Please, I love-" I cut her off by adding a third finger and rapidly thrusting them in and out, making her head roll back, and I wasn't letting up. The gushing sound coming from her pussy as I finger fucked her was egging me on too much to let up.

"Baby! Baby!" She gasps in pleasure, hips halting as I get to her sweet spot. I relentlessly hit that spot, over and over again as she says my name and my ego grows. I always thought hearing my name from ARMY was music to my ears, but having my wife chant it as I hold her shaking body with my fingers buried deep inside her? It was just a better use of my name...

"Take me baby... Please. Please, fuck me." She whimpers and I feel completely lightheaded at her pleas. I pull my fingers out, making her groan at the loss.

"Don't worry, baby. I'm gonna give you something much bigger." I assure in her ear, making her squeal. I roll her on to her side with me behind her.

"My hands! Please!" She pants as I kiss and bite along her neck. I groan softly and kiss her ear before releasing her wrists. My hands roam her body before I finally undo my jeans that were acting as a prison for my cock. I moan at the relief of my bulge finally being free from it's trap.

Her hand is on my cock before I can even guide it between her legs myself. I smirk as I watch her eyes stay glued to the mirror by our bed. "You know exactly where to look. Good girl..." I praise as I help push into her.

She sucks in some air fast and I grab her leg to hold over my hip so I can push in deeper. "Fuck..." I groan as I feel my cock instantly become surrounded by her warm and wet walls that squeeze around my length in need. "Treat my cock so good, baby..." I pant.

"Give me..." She whines and it makes me smirk. So needy...

I start fucking her faster and her hand goes to mine that's around her waist. Her nails dig into my arm and the burn of her nails going up my forearm only makes me thrust faster. "Oh... Fuck, baby!" I groaned as I move my hips so I can find her sweet spot.

"Jungkook!" She moans out loudly and I smirk. Found it.

Y/N throws her head back, her hair everywhere and her chest moving rapidly up and down. My head moves to the cork of her neck so naturally. This was so natural. I could never experience this with anyone else. And if I had to fuck her speechless to get it through her head that she was my one and only, then so be it.

"So perfect..." I breathed out against her ear as I watch het through the mirror before slowing down. I wanted her to feel every fucking inch of my cock. I wanted to feel just how tight her walls wrap around my cock with need to keep me in.

"Look at me." I whispered and grab Y/N by her chin before she can move, making her whimper loudly. She locks eyes with me.

"Please. Please, fuck me. I have to cum..." She shivers and I smirk as I move my forehead, so it's pressed to hers. She gasps loudly as I give her hard and slow thrusts.

"You are so perfect." I breathed out and she just whispers my name shakily. I smile at her reaction, eyes rolling shut and mouth dropping open. My firm hand moves to her clit to rub it. The look on her face was one of pure need. Pure beauty...

"I love you. I love your body. I love your mind, baby. Fuck..." I pant. "I fucking love everything about you..." I ramble on as she blushes more, whining how much she loves me.

"Kookie... I... Oh god... H-Harder... I-I love you! Please, baby, harder." Y/N cries out, and I move harder. Her hand moves down to hold mine that's rubbing at her clit faster now. I kiss along her face as she trembles.

"Let go, baby." I breathe out. "Come on, beautiful... Cum for me." I continue and Y/N presses her lips against mine hard, but she barely kisses me, too lost in pleasure. I don't mind though. I swallow all of her moans as she cums hard, her whole body shaking as she throws her head back against my shoulder blade, breaking our kiss. I continue through her orgasm and after a few more thrusts, I cum just as hard inside of her.

We don't move after such an intense session. The silence in the room is loud as we try to catch our breaths. I do, however, spend time kissing all over her face, neck, and shoulder as she softly begins giggling, something she does when fully satisfied, and it's always enough to make me fall all over again.

"I love you." The voice is weak and shaky, but it belongs to the woman I love. So, it's perfect...

"I love you too, baby." I say back, my voice hoarse. I slowly move out of her, making her gasp softly at the loss. I pull her into my side to cuddle.

"I'm sorry. For being a handful." She mutters quietly and I chuckle softly.

"Don't be. I'll always be ready to remind you just how amazing you are. I can handle you, baby. Never forget it." I smirk before kissing her tenderly.

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Also, can we talk about the fact that I've reached 300 followers! Love you all!

[i-luv-carl-grimes]

A light that never goes out

‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ 𖤓 ☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

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Au: alright so some ppl actually likes this so far so here pt.2 and as promised I'll go more in detail with this part as well as go deeper into the story line ENJOY!!

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Word spread with wild fire that someone was being "required" on task force 141 which was wrong but was also right. I spent my night at the shooting range when I should've been gathering my things, then I saw someone walk in. A strong looking man, maybe in his late twenties. He had a... Interesting hair style, one of which was a mohawk. He also had the British flag on his vest... Odd... A brit all the way in Texas? That's odd. Enough with the questions (Y/n) you came here to clear your mind. So do it.

I looked back down at my bandaged hand and noticed that the blister wounds had reopened and were now bleeding through the thin gauze. I ignored it and continued shooting. Not realizing the man had approach me.

"Hey there Girly" ....girly...? "Uh.., ya-?" can't people just LEAVE ME ALONE! "How long have you been at it?" he question... He didn't look like a higher up so I don't gotta be polite do I? "I'm busy, go bother someone else" I said and looked back at the targets then continued shooting. "Man aren't you snappy, and a dam good shot at that" why is he here and why is he talking to me? "I'm lookin' for a girl... Price said her name was (Y/n)-" "Rain, it's Rain to you" I snapped and he put up his hands. "My bad kid, I'm Soap" he let out a hand, I didn't wanna be completely rude so I let out mine... Forgetting about my now blood soaked bandages. "Bloody hell- what have you been up to? You shouldn't over to do" yeah okay dad. "What do you want" I said not enjoying how this interaction was holding up. "I'm pickin' you up" he said and I turned. "Excuse me?" he grinned and looked down at me. "You heard me Rookie now get your bags were leaving" he said once more wirhout giving me a real answer. I just decided to go along with it and I walked into the sleeping quarters, "Soap" was following behind he causing everyone else to whisper and stair. Why did HE have to come along? I walked into my section and the other girls lifted there head up and looked at me and Soap. "No fucking way.... They recruited you!?" a girl named Madie said. I didn't respond just grabbed my things and put them in a duffle bag. "Let's get going Private" wait... Private...HE WAS A HIGHER RANK!? god dammit. That still doesn't clear up who he is.

I was lead out of the camp and over to a large truck, standing next to it was Captain Price. "Rain, glad you could make it" he said and placed a hand on my shoulder. "This is soap, he's a field commander, you'll be working with him and the others for the next few weeks" he continued... The others? Holy shit... I really am gonna be working with the best. "Yes sir," he paused for a moment. "And (Y/n). I know your capable of this... Don't make me question your skill" he patted my shoulder then stepped aside inviting me to go into the truck. I climbed in and immediately force...

Sitting around me were two other extremely well built men. One specificly was wearing a skull mask, he looked to be the biggest in the group... And a little intimating... "Everyone, this is Rain. She'll be joining us on our next mission," Soap said. "Don't be dick heads, introduce yourselfs" he snapped and a man got up and walked over to me then let out his hand. "Gaz" he said... He seemed rather quiet I went to shake his hand then cringed when I felt the pressure against my wounds. "Ghost don't be a-" "she's gonna get killed" the man in the skull mask said and everyone went silent. "Price said shes better then anyone else in her group. She's one helleva shot too, saw it myself" Soap said, he was quick to my defense I appreciated that. "Yeah but he's a rookie, she doesn't have any real experience" this ghost guy was seriously pissing me off. "Give 'er a chance Ghost" he just rolled his black out eyes and I took a seat next to Gaz and soap as the truck started moving. It was quiet... And awkward till Soap started talking.

"How long have ya' been training?" Soap asked and I shrugged. "A few months, maybe 3 or 4" Soap and Gaz were nice and chill.... I cant say the same for the fuck head other there though (ghost)

"What's the mission about?" I looked over at Soap. "Hold your horses kid, it's your first day calm it would ya?" he replied and Gaz snorted. "And here let me see your hand" he took out some new gauze. "I got it" I said trying to take it from him but he pulled back. I then swiped it away from him quicker. "I said I got it" I looked at him through the corner of my eye. "Yes Ma'am" he let out a chuckle. I took off the old bloody bandages off. "How'd ya do that?" Gaz asked and I shrugged. "One two many round I guess, it doesn't hurt though" I threw the bloody ones away and put on the new ones. Gaz and Soap went back to talking while Ghost just sat there not moving a inch... What a weirdo. Wait... These are the solders on task force 141? Hell this WAS task force 141...mohawk guy, a dude in a mask and Gaz.... Interesting....

It was gonna be a while till we reached the UK so I grabbed a book I brought from home and opened it to turn part I last left off on.

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Au: enemies to lovers??? (My fave trope)

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[whisker-biscuit]

Sonic Big Bang 2024

Close Encounters of the Grim Kind: Chapter 3

-----------------------------------

Through the next few days, Tails discovered three things aside from his alternate dimensional research.

It took about six hours for the probe to make a round trip from him to his new pen pal and back when they tested it.

His pen pal was extremely intelligent and just as interested in the state of the Shatterverse as he was. They did not, however, want to talk about anything else, and especially not themselves.

Sonic was still refusing to share the full picture of what happened during his adventure.

Only one of these things was technically a problem, but the fox was a scientist first and foremost, and a very curious child on top of that. So, he set out to “solve” each and every one.

The first one was easy, relatively speaking. The device had been built to travel indefinitely, collecting data at manageable speeds to be analyzed later. Now that it wasn’t being used as a probe but as a simple messenger, it was no issue to redirect some of its power output away from its memory banks and towards its speed instead. He let his pen pal know what he was doing, and wasn’t surprised when they offered their own assistance, claiming that they had worked with Paradox Prism energy to know how to make movement almost instantaneous. Working off only a fraction of that power instead of the entire prism meant it would still be slower than that, but any upgrade on that front would be an improvement.

Together, they were able to drop the travel time from six hours to two, which helped immensely. It also made Tails debate crossing “Sails” off of his list of potential people, because Sonic never mentioned the pirate ever getting close enough to the Prism to learn how to do that. In the end, he kept the name on because the evidence against its presence was still flimsy.

Additionally, his unknown collaborator sent equations that would allow Tails to duplicate his own technology with Prism energy, which he used to make several more probes to send out across the Shatterverse. None of those devices were intercepted and fed data at a constant rate to his computer for him to observe and report back to the pen pal.

By the end of the week, it became routine for a familiar flash of light to appear in the fox’s shop every few hours. He’d pause in whatever he was working on to read and respond to the message as though it were an overly detailed texting app instead of the intricate probe that he’d built it to be.

[ have you found any interdimensional cracks or signs of decay? ]

– No. So far, none of my probes have registered any anomalies. –

[ good ]

[ i was unable to check for that since losing access to the shards ]

[ was worried it might return even though the paradox prism was reformed ]

– What about you? –

– Did you see anything concerning appear in your own dimension recently? –

[ none so far but ill keep you posted if that changes ]

The second problem took a little longer to work around, and Tails wracked his brain for ways to approach it without raising suspicion. He desperately wanted to know whether he was working with an Eggman above all else. It was hard to think about how their minimal exchange exploring and discussing the Shatterspace’s state of being was beneficial to any version of the mad scientist, but he’d been caught off guard by a convoluted evil scheme before and had no intention of kickstarting another with his own help.

At first, he tried to gauge his mystery partner’s interest in technology.

– I’m sorry my last message was delayed for so long. –

– I was caught up in a new invention idea and lost track of time. –

[ theres no expectation for a prompt response ]

[ im not offended ]

– That’s a relief. Do you ever get tunnel vision with your own projects like me? –

[ yes ]

– Glad to see I’m not alone! –

– What kind of projects do you like to work on? –

Asking that last question led to him being ignored for nearly half a day until one of his probes completed its semi-scheduled data returns, in which his pen pal finally sent the device back asking about its findings. There was no mention of the original inquiry; Tails got the message and didn’t bring the topic up again.

It did make him cross out Mr. Dr. Eggman’s name on his list, however – from what Sonic had told him, the man never would have been able to pass up the chance to brag about his own genius, no matter how obvious the trap.

His second attempt was more roundabout – disguising it as idle curiosity about the Paradox Prism and the Shatterverse.

– There’s still so much we don’t know about all of this. –

– My memory is a bit hazy about what happened when the dimensions split. What do you remember? –

It was admittedly a dangerous gamble. He didn’t know how many people Sonic had told about the Prism being from Green Hill, or that he himself had no recollection of the dimensions breaking apart. Someone as smart as his pen pal might be able to deduce who exactly he was – and by extension, where Sonic was – if he made a single misstep. The last thing Tails wanted was to put another target on his brother’s back even if it was from a source that probably wasn’t much of a current threat without a way to cross dimensions independently. Eggman ingenuity was never a thing to take lightly.

[ i didnt personally notice anything different until sonic first appeared ]

[ he was the catalyst for the changes in our dimension and across the shatterverse ]

Tails couldn’t help but laugh when he received that message.

– Yeah, that seems to be a constant for him. –

– He mentioned he had Prism energy inside his body that allowed him to traverse the dimensions –

– Did you ever see that in action? –

[ yes. it was remarkable to experience ]

[ the first time he used that power, he briefly shut down power in all the machines in a significant area ]

That little tidbit gave the fox pause. He remembered very well Sonic’s description of that event – and how it had happened when he was a captive of the Chaos Council. Without immediately replying, the fox instead found his notebook of names and finally removed Sails from it. Then his pencil hovered over Nine’s name for a solid minute. Sonic had mentioned that dimensional counterpart had been captured at the time as well, but had he actually been there to witness the explosion Sonic had caused?

Asking outright was likely going to go ignored again. He tapped the pencil to paper and stared at the probe as he considered how to react to this new revelation without his pen pal shutting it down.

– What was that power output like? Was it a visible phenomenon? –

Receiving a response within the average two hours made him heave a sigh of relief.

[ extremely visible ]

[ the best way to describe it was a giant rainbow hued shockwave that extended outward from his body ]

[ it was pure unfiltered prism energy with no direction or goal ]

– That sounds incredible. Did the Paradox Prism ever do something like that independent of Sonic? –

[ yes, but it looked a bit different ]

And so, the inquiry turned back around to their research without any further fanfare. As grateful as Tails was for the new hint and frustrated that it was still too vague to fully confirm his pen pal’s identity, he left those follow-up questions alone for the time being. Patience was going to be his best friend in this careful investigation.

Speaking of best friends…

Sonic had finally started to lose his manic energy regarding his friends. He wasn’t pestering them for hang-outs as often, he wasn’t spending most of his time loitering around outside Tails’ workshop anymore, and his daily runs were taking him far enough away again that sometimes it would be more than a day before any of them caught even a glimpse of him. Both Amy and Knuckles expressed their relief to see him settling back in after his solo adventure, and even Rouge made a passing comment about it when they crossed paths.

The fact that he still hadn’t told Tails about everything that had happened wasn’t as worrisome any longer, and probably would have just become idle curiosity if not for how he stumbled onto something he was obviously not meant to see.

He’d been on his way back from Amy’s house and decided to take a quick detour towards the waterfall he had first met Shadow at, hoping to tell the hedgehog that Sonic finally seemed to be doing better again. He’d flown up the cliff from the hill’s side until he reached the very top, but found himself to be the only one there today.

Then the familiar sound of a sonic boom made his ears twitch and he looked out at the landscape.

A blue streak was approaching, followed by a yellow one that was keeping pace but not gaining it. Tails watched, surprised, as his brother came to a stop at the shore of the lake below the waterfall. What was even more surprising was how Shadow caught up a second later and stood beside him instead of challenging him to a spar or another race to even the score. They began speaking, too far away for him to hear, but even from up high he could tell by their body language that it was a tense conversation.

Getting close enough to eavesdrop wasn’t an option. Both hedgehogs had hearing that would pick up his flying immediately, and he was almost certain that whatever they were talking about it would stop the instant they noticed his presence. Feeling a twinge of guilt that wasn’t enough to assuage his interest, the fox pulled out his Miles Electric and began tuning it to amplify the sound waves from below to a frequency he could hear and understand.

“….fine, Shadow, honest! Man, I had no idea you were such a mother hen.”

“It’s not about ‘mothering’, Sonic. It’s a legitimate concern.”

“Aww, you’re concerned about little old me? Never thought I’d hear you confess it outright.”

The sound of their banter made Tails’ shoulders relax when he hadn’t even realized they’d been raised. It meant that whatever they were talking about probably wasn’t all that serious after all. Or it meant…

“Stop deflecting. It’s not going to get you out of this conversation.”

…His brother was avoiding a discussion, again.

Sonic sighed so visibly that Tails didn’t even need his device to see the action. He put his hands on his hips and turned towards the lake, kicking a rock into the water as he did so.

“I really mean it, Shadow. I’m fine. I feel fine. Nothing about that has changed since we returned to Green Hill. I get why you’re worried, but there’s nothing to be worried about anymore.”

“Your brother seemed to think differently.”

“Tails?” His head whipped around so fast to stare at Shadow that all his quills bounced in sync. “What do you mean? You’ve been talking to him? What did he say?”

The other hedgehog crossed his arms, looking irritated even from far below. “Contrary to whatever belief you might hold, we keep in contact when the situation calls for it. He has expressed worry that you aren’t behaving like yourself.”

Tails’ eyes went wide. What was Shadow doing? Hadn’t he been the one who insisted that they keep Sonic out of their arrangement? And now he was blabbing about a private conversation!

“Oh, well, if that’s why you’re suddenly up in my business, don’t worry. We talked it out a while back.”

“Did you?”

“Yes, Shadow, geez. He noticed I’ve been a little…clingy, and I told him it was because I was thinking a lot about the dimensional counterparts we had to leave behind. Plus, y’know, the whole “all my friends became shadows of themselves that I thought I’d never be able to piece back together” part? Pretty obvious why I’ve been off my game the last few weeks.”

“Did you tell him about –”

“No, I didn’t, and I don’t need to.” Sonic’s tone took on a hard edge. “I’m not about to put that on his shoulders. It has nothing to do with him and he’d still feel guilty about it.”

“What happens if you ever start to deteriorate?”

Deteriorate?!

“I’m not going to, Shadow! There’s literally been no reason to worry about that! You are literally the only one worrying about that.”

“Of course I am, Sonic!” The hedgehog closed his eyes. A pained expression flashed across his face and his voice grew softer when he spoke again. “Of course, I am. You were…dying in my arms.”

Tails felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. He backed away from the edge of the cliff and clutched the Miles Electric in shock, hoping he’d misheard what had just been said. The long silence that fell between the two down below was enough of an answer. Too much of an answer.

“Listen, I’m really sorry about that,” Sonic finally said, sounding more somber than he’d been in a long time. “Truly, I am. I wish I could go back and do things differently so you never had to experience that. But I mean it when I say that I haven’t felt any different since we got back. No weird energy, no sparks, no teleporting no matter how fast I’ve been running. Nine said he pulled all of it out of me and I have no reason not to believe him. Especially not after…all of that.”

More silence. Tails curled his namesakes around himself to try and soothe his sudden shaking.

“…You really trust him that much, huh?” Shadow’s voice was unreadable, and so quiet that it was barely audible even through the device.

“Absolutely. Just as much as I trust Tails. We’d all be wiped from existence if it weren’t for him.”

Another long pause.

“Shadow, I get why you’re worried, and I promise I’ll tell you if something changes. We both said we’d be better about communicating after this, didn’t we?”

“We did.”

“Then trust me when I say I’m okay. Please?”

“…Fine.”

“Thank you.”

“You really should tell someone else about this, though. If not your brother, then one of your friends.”

“I’ll think about it. You up for a race to the ocean?”

“Perhaps another time.”

“Alrighty, then. See you later.”

A blue streak zoomed off, visible for only a few seconds before disappearing beyond the horizon. Tails found the ability to move and peeked back over the side of the cliff. Shadow was still at the lake shore, staring in the direction Sonic had run off in. His back was turned to the waterfall and so the fox couldn’t see his expression. After nearly a minute of standing there like a statue, his rocket shoes kicked into gear and he dashed off as well in a different direction.

Tails sat down right where he was, completely stunned by everything he had just heard and struggling to process it. Sonic had almost died. Sonic had been dying and hadn’t told anyone about it. How had that even happened? They’d mentioned something about “weird energy.” Was that because of the Chaos Council? The Shatterverse breaking down? Him being displaced from the dimensions in the first place and physics had finally caught up to his body?

And why on Mobius did he think Tails would blame himself if he knew?

Thoroughly shaken up, the fox flew straight home. He was still so blindsided by the information he’d unintentionally learned that he didn’t even notice the probe hovering above his desk until he collapsed into his chair after almost an hour of pacing his workshop.

He picked it up almost on autopilot, staring at the latest messages there without really reading them. It was some theory about why the other dimensions still existed with the Paradox Prism reformed, but he couldn’t wrap his head around the words no matter how he tried to distract himself with them. What did pointless theories matter when his own brother had nearly died – might still be at risk of it if Shadow’s concern was valid?

Tails needed answers and he needed them now. Screw Shadow’s terms, screw whether this mystery person was a friend or foe, screw everything that wasn’t going to tell him what he needed to know. If it ensured Sonic’s safety then he’d take any risk.

Instead of replying, the young scientist shut the device off and pulled out its blueprints, along with the notebook he’d used to parse out the equations for how to make it travel faster between dimensions. Additionally, he recalled all of his probes that had been out collecting data. Two hours between messages was too long to wait for each reply. He needed this to be as instantaneous as his pen pal had claimed the Prism energy was capable of, and he was going to use all the energy currently at his disposal to do it.

A preliminary glance at the time told him it was early evening. He turned off or flipped over every clock and time-keeper in his space, knowing this was going to be a long haul. From the kitchen he retrieved a full pitcher of water, an entire half-pan of lasagna leftovers, and three unopened energy drinks. As each probe returned one by one in small flashes of rainbow light, Tails cracked his fingers, stretched his arms once over his head, and got right to work.

It took most of the night. By the time he shut the final panel on the device, finished charging it with all the other probes, and turned it back on, the nearest clock read nearly 3 AM when he dared to look. The fox cradled the device in his hands, thoroughly exhausted. For all the work that he had just accomplished, he knew that was technically the easiest part of this entire thing. The rest hinged entirely on his mystery collaborator.

Tails drank the rest of his last energy drink, then spent the next five minutes crafting a message that would get his intentions across without scaring his pen pal away forever.

– I know we agreed to keep this as solely a research venture but this is urgent. –

– Do you know what happened to Sonic before he returned to Green Hill? Is there a chance it could happen to him again? –

– Please. I need to know. –

He sent it out before he could second-guess the wording. Then he waited.

Nothing came back.

The fox gave it ten minutes. Thirty. An hour. Just like the very first time he’d activated the device, he was left in limbo, waiting and wondering if everything he’d worked so hard for was about to go up in flames. He knew it wasn’t just about technological limitations anymore. There was a small chance that his pen pal was asleep, but their time zones were very different and they seemed to have just as odd a sleeping schedule as he did. The radio silence was most likely an intentional one.

Eventually, out of lack of anything better to do, Tails began cleaning up his work station just to get rid of some of the nervous energy jittering through his body. He glanced at his desk for any sign of flashing lights so often it was quickly becoming a compulsion, and so he forced himself to leave the room entirely. Crawling into bed had him feeling conflicted; he was so tired and on the verge of a crash, but he was terrified that any minute the device would return and he would miss it for hours.

In the end, physical needs won. Tails passed out the moment his head hit the pillow and he drifted off into restless sleep.

[ben-learns-smth]

first months as a (substitute/supportive) teacher - some thoughts (an incomplete list)

autumn holidays start on friday, so I thought I'd write down some thoughts on my experience of the last 2-ish months. I definitely have some growing and learning to do, it shows that I'm only half-trained for this

surprisingly I enjoy working with the smallest (grade 1/2) the most. it's partially that (unless they need me for substitute lessons) I spend the most time in that class and have gotten to know the pupils quite well. I know the routines of the class and I got into a great rhythm with the main teacher

the pupils are opening up a lot more about their interests and their lives, striking up conversations with me when they see me in the yard during break. I'm glad that I don't seem like a stranger to them anymore!

substitute lessons without tasks prepared by the teacher are more draining than I expected them to be. I also lack skills for coming up with substitute lessons for my subjects (let alone other subjects) bc I have very little experience of what they're already supposed to know/be able to do. especially in english lessons it's hard to find an appropriate level

being the only visibly and out trans nonbinary teacher is exhausting. I'm looking forward to the day when I've given substitute lessons in every class so I can stop explaining myself. I don't mind explaining queer topics to children and it's important to have those conversations but I'm the only one having them bc I have to, bc my genderqueer appearance raises questions and if it doesn't introducing myself as mr./mx. does.

related to that I'm excited to work with another colleague on a diversity concept for the school that focuses on queerness. our main objective will be to raise awareness in teachers and students

I still struggle to find an appropriate mix between being strict and being fun. with some classes it works well, with others I need to be stricter than I'd like to be, with others I need to ease off a bit.

schools are incredibly gendered spaces and while I obviously knew that it still caught me off guard (and tbh I think it's having an influence on my habits which I Don't Like At All). everything is very clearly divided into boys and girls. I'm generally good with gender neutral language, but compared to my first weeks I jump to use gendered terms much quicker now (example: saying "the girl in the red jumper" instead of a neutral version when I don't know their names yet), including when I talk about myself which feels weird

good quality sleep is so important. being a teacher is super demanding, especially in some more chaotic classes and showing up with only a few hours of sleep is Not It

being able to remember names really well really fast is a super power and I'm grateful I can do that every time I meet a new class for a substitute lesson. the kids are impressed (teachers too), but most importantly it creates a different atmosphere in the classroom. (it's also easier to remind them of class rules when they need it)

so far, the past months have confirmed what I've been thinking for a while: teaching is something I could do, but I'm less sure if it's what I want to do in the long run. so even though I wasn't able to start deaf studies this winter I'm sticking to my plan: try out deaf studies for a year (starting next autumn) and work on the side, then decide if a) I keep going like that to do the full deaf studies b.a. b) I pause deaf studies to do my teacher training and then evaluate again or c) I do my teacher training and pick up uni classes for fun after

[thedinanshiral]

After the reveal

Cinematic trailer and gameplay reveal already out of the way, now we wait. What's a few months after ten long, painful years? Sure, i can wait some more, and now i'll do it more gladly than ever.

There's not much i could add to what everyone is talking about, so this will be a post of personal impressions.

Cinematic trailer: while i admit i was not liking it much at first, and yes i did compare it to Fortnite, i immediately went to watch DAI's cinematic trailer because i remembered it looked kinda funny too. And then i remembered DAO's awful, truly awful trailers and i felt my worries washed away by the waves of "It'll be ok" Beach. Cinematic trailers should be taken as what they are, a basic look into the game, not its final version -unless it's stated as such in the trailer itself-. I saw people not liking the characters' presentation cards but i think they were ok, as we have new factions and all. That's all it was, a quick look at new companions and locations. But as always some people went rabid over it like an undertaker eager to put six-feet worth of dirt on your face. As they've been doing for the past decade and even before that, for which i have a Zero Tolerance Policy. As for the music, while i do like Bowie i'm not a fan of that version of Heroes, and in my heart nothing beats DAI's Into the darkness as a trailer song but after the dust settled that's really my only real complaint.

Gameplay reveal: I'm glad it put most people at ease. I'm sad Varric couldn't succeed in convincing his old friend and that in the moment Solas decided destroying Bianca was the way to make him stop trying for good, that he was cruel intentionally to that end. I'm not sure how combat will feel like but i'll get used to it. I'm certainly not a fan of having to pause every two frames and i did enjoy combat in Mass Effect Andromeda so having only two companions tag along isn't exactly a new thing either. I'm a bit confused about the commands wheel screen, and how it works exactly. Location and ambience-wise i loved it all, i know they had to cut it short for the video but i hope we get a bit more freedom to explore the area. It's one thing to cut the scale down from The Hinterlands but i'd hate it for these new locales to feel like a shoebox. I'm curious to see if the tone indicators in the dialogue wheel will be like in DAI or more like in DA2, and i hope it's the latter because i need a Purple protagonist in my life again.

I rather wait until we know more, ideally until i get to play it myself, before i start weaving words about what was peaking through the rip in the Veil, about the ritual and all that sweet, sweet lore intoxication i'm gonna be getting.

What's coming: BW were kind enough to give us a bit of a schedule

Now armed with past experiences and my intuition, i'd like to explore possibilities. I've always thought the release date should be in November. It marks the 10th anniversary of Dragon Age Inquisition, and the 15th annoversary of Dragon Age Origins. On top of that, it's the year of the Dragon, and November is close enough to the holidays to bank on that as well. So i'm considering the possibility that after June 18th they give us a some days to process everything so far, and there's also the character creator reveal as well. And then by July i think they could start showing us a bit more with character trailers. With seven companions plus Rook i'd say one trailer per week is enough to make it to mid September. I Imagine a basic presentation of Rook in some of their variants, to reintroduce those origins people missed so much, the new factions, etc, could take over July and then the companions over August and September. Maybe we could get more official art or short stories sprinkled here and there too. After that i'd say a pre-order and release date would be great, giving everyone a month or so to get ready for a glorious November release right on time for my birthday.

Anyway that's all in my head, for now we have nothing beyond June 18th. I'm mostly waiting for a pre-order, of course a release date, and whether or not there'll be a Collector's edition or anythin like it so i can work my magic to get one.

[broccoliboix5peepeeman]

Midoriya-sensei AU

Chapter 12: Sports Day

I've decided I'm going to officially change updates to the 15th of every month, because I just don't have to time to post twice a month considering the chapters seem to be getting longer (who's fault could that be? ^^') and I don't want to disappoint

Also, I made a POLL regarding a minor side plot, so let me know if you're interested or not!

Part 11 | Ao3 | Part 13

[Sunday 8th October]

Me [1812]: I'm sorry im watching ths news and.erm did you jut use YOUR FIRE???

Me [1813]: Thats so amazing you look great I'm so proud of you!

Me [1814]: I will be screaming to you about this next time I see you but for now I'll just scream over text

Me [1814]: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1833]: 🔥

***

Izuku, understandably, felt extra excited when he walked into work Monday morning. It had been over a week and not only had Shoto taken what he’d said to heart, but he’d actually started training his fire!

Initially, Izuku had been concerned—Shoto’s replies had been slow and abrupt since their hangout, and Fuyumi had even noticed that he’d been staying back at the agency later than usual—but after his friend’s shift yesterday evening, a phone call had quickly put those worries to rest. It turned out that Shoto had simply spent the past week training his left side; he’d even called for private coaching from Eraserhead and Endeavour, the latter of which was surprising but logical.

‘He’s not a complete bastard wank anymore, and what good is my father if I can’t take advantage of his knowledge?’ He could practically hear the shrug in Shoto’s voice. ‘He was pretty helpful, and Eraser was his usual brutal self. I learnt a lot.’

‘I’m really glad!’ Izuku’s cheeks hurt from smiling. ‘So you’re feeling more confident?’

‘The past week’s been hell, and I still have a lot of catching up to do, but yeah.’ A pause. ‘I feel confident to begin using my… my fire, in the field.’

Izuku honestly couldn’t wait to see Shoto’s growth. He was already so proud of his friend, and he knew his family would be too, especially Rei. It was a huge step—he was going to need to compile a new notebook dedicated solely to Shoto's left side.

He was still grinning about it, even as he walked across the field, setting up the obstacle course for the students.

Part of Izuku was also thankful for the timing, as Shoto's news was what was currently suppressing the anxiety bubbling in his stomach. After all, today was sports day, and while the event was typically one of his favourites in the academic calendar, they were also using it to implement their last minute plan to help Hiru.

They couldn't afford for anything to go wrong.

‘Hey.’ Fuyumi walked over, smiling gently. She’d already finished helping one of the other teachers set up the beanbag toss. ‘How’re you doing?’

‘Ask me again in approximately eight hours.’ He chuckled humorlessly as he lined up the tunnels, before positioning the skipping ropes on the other side. 'I'll be honest, I'm feeling a nervous poop coming.'

'You sound like Natsuo.' She snorted, immediately reaching down to help him with the equipment.

‘I’ll take that as a complement.’ He stuck his tongue out in response. ‘Thanks.’

His lower body grumbled with discomfort and he pulled a face. ‘Once this is finished, I’ll pop over. Just the sacks left after this.’

‘Don’t worry about it, I’ll finish off here.’ Despite her kindness, there was an assertive air to her voice which told Izuku that she wasn’t accepting no for an answer.

That was fine with him.

‘Really? Thank you! You’re the best honestly!’ He immediately dropped everything and ran to the building. Once inside, he beelined for the staff toilets. ‘Thank fuck…’

Once he was finished, Izuku checked his phone to find that it was only a few minutes before the first bell. Luckily, his classroom wasn’t too far. Anxiety still lingered in his body—he suspected it would for the duration of the school day—but it wasn’t overwhelming; he still smiled brightly as he greeted his students and took the register, before leading them to the assembly hall. They had all come to school in their PE kits, so it was rather amusing to see them wearing their usual school shoes instead of their trainers, due to being inside.

Izuku then took his place next to Fuyumi, like clockwork, and the two of them watched the other students filter in.

‘Did you get sorted okay?’

‘Yeah, all good.’ She shrugged. ‘Did you have a good poop?’

‘Y’know, I’m still not sure… but I certainly needed it.’ He answered shamelessly. There wasn’t really a filter between them at this point—they’d seen their students do more horrifying things over the years.

The Head soon began with the usual topics—reminding the faculty about the HQA information session that was coming up in a few weeks—before he eventually brought up the giant elephant in the room.

‘I can practically hear you all vibrating with excitement, even without my quirk, so no point delaying. As you’re aware, today is sports day!' He paused while the students cheered. 'This year, however, we’ve put a special twist on it…’

Usually, grades were kept separate—the two classes competing against each other—but this time, there would be four distinct teams: Lemillion, consisting of classes 2B, 3A and 4B; Dynamite, including classes 2A, 3B and 4B; Shoto, of which Fuyumi’s class, 1B, was a part of, as well as 5B and 6A; and All Might, encompassing the final three classes—Izuku had been fierce in his demand to be put on the latter team. So, while each grade would still go around each activity together as a whole, the allotted points they’d accumulate went to their designated teams.

That meant that Hiru and his antagonists had to rely on each other to win, and the prize was a trophy for each winning class.

The formal reason behind the team set-up was to encourage the different grades to support each other and build a rapport. Hopefully, it might also allow certain individuals to reflect on their differences.

Hopefully.

‘Now that you all have your teams, it’s time for the schedule.’ The Head brought up the next powerpoint side, showing a table. ‘Some of you will notice that your homeroom teacher is running an activity. That is why each grade will walk around together. So, for example, grade one will follow Todoroki-sensei, while Midoriya-sensei runs the obstacle course. Make sense?'

A sea of heads immediately bobbed up and down.

The Head smiled. 'Great! Now, your teacher will also have a copy of the schedule, so there's no need to memorise it…'

There were a few more minutes of technicalities—a few kids clearly becoming impatient—before everyone was finally released. While Fuyumi gathered their students together, Izuku quickly made his way back out to the field, along with a few other teachers. Some parents were already congregating around the activities, eager to support their kids. He smiled in greeting and exchanged pleasantries with a few, but otherwise remained silent as he waited.

He rocked back and forth on his feet, imagining all the different outcomes of the day. Hiru was the fastest runner in his grade—probably the older ones too—due to his quirk. That was why they’d deliberately scheduled the whole school for the relay race at the end of the day. That way, they could set it up so each team could cheer each other on for the final event.

His thoughts were interrupted before he could truly get lost in them, as a flock of children suddenly swarmed the field.

There were five other events, not including the obstacle course and relay. Tug of war was fairly self-explanatory, as was dance; along with the bean bag toss—throw as many beanbags into your team’s basket as possible before the time runs out—and the cavalry battle. Admittedly though, the latter wouldn’t be as impressive as UA’s infamous cavalry battle due to the lack of quirk usage.

The event that was often the most confusing for foreign students was oodama, but that was just because of the name, which was just “giant ball”. Essentially, each team had to carry a giant inflatable ball together to the goal point; if they dropped it, they’d have to start again. Izuku really hoped Hiru had brought along his personalised cover for his quills, otherwise they might have some issues with that one.

‘Namaste, Midoriya-sensei!’

He smiled as the sixth graders surrounded him, all bowing simultaneously. They were the year below his previous homeroom class—when he’d had India for global month—so naturally, they’d all joined in during the legendary “Namaste phase” and made sure not to let it die out entirely.

Indulging them, he put his palms together and bowed.

‘Namaste, bachche! How're you all doing?'

He snorted when they immediately began speaking over each other—clearly excited—and waited until they’d all calmed down before taking them through the usual rules. There would be six races, with roughly ten students per race. Then, the winner of each race would enter the final, and points would be assigned based on their placement.

It wasn’t too difficult considering the sixth graders had already done the course before—with just a few minor changes—but once they’d moved on, his next group was the first graders.

‘Hey, Sensei!’ His students greeted excitedly. ‘We just did our dance routine!’

‘Did you?’ He gasped. ‘How did it go?’

‘It went really well!’ Hana jumped up and down. ‘Our parents all watched as well, which was super fun! Okaasan took pictures!’

‘We didn’t win though.’ Haku pouted, crossing his arms as class B joined them.

‘It was really close!’ Fuyumi tried to placate. ‘You were all really good! Like professional dancers!’

‘Like Pinky?’ Izuku offered, knowing his students would appreciate the comparison. When Fuyumi quickly agreed, they brightened up significantly, and he explained the rules.

It ended up being a close one, but after the first set of races, the finalists were decided: four from class B and two from A. Luckily though, Hiru and Touta managed to bag the top two spots, bringing the scores to a tie as they went off to the next activity. Izuku waved farewell as he quickly prepared everything for the second graders.

By the time lunch came around and the scores were tallied, team All Might were in joint second with Dynamight, while team Shoto was in the lead. It was pretty close, which was to be expected—especially to build suspense and competition—but it still made Izuku nervous.

His leg was twitching.

'Stop overthinking.' Fuyumi nudged him from where they were sitting: a picnic bench in the playground, as the children played around them. 'We've set everything in motion, it's up to the kids now.'

'I know.' He sighed, exasperated. 'But I'm a worrier!'

'And I'm not?' She scoffed with a laugh. 'Come on. There's nothing else you can do for now.'

'Only because I haven't thought of something yet.' He argued weakly.

Maybe there was some way he could figure out a plan to have the different grades work together, or set up an ethical way to jeopardise-

‘Nope. Not going there.' Fuyumi interjected, before slurping up more noodles. He must've been staring at his bento for too long and mumbling out loud. 'Tell you what, I'll change the subject. How was your weekend?’

Not even subtle… but Izuku chose to take the bait. Worrying made his stomach hurt.

‘Pretty uneventful…’ He shrugged, using his chopsticks to move his food around. Despite his best efforts, he couldn't quite keep the smile from his face as his mind recalled a certain hero. ‘Y’know, other than the obvious. You?’

‘Yeah, I was pretty much the same.’ She laughed halfheartedly. 'You really must be nervous for Hiru, considering you haven't even brought up Shoto until now, and that was with some prompting.'

'I've just not had the time to properly gush about it.' He placed a hand over his chest, then eyed his friend cautiously. 'Plus, I wanted to check first: how're you feeling about it?'

She flashed him a grateful smile, then shook her head affectionately.

'It's… I'm feeling hopeful, I think.' She pursed her lips, pondering. ‘It was just… surprising, to say the least. As you know, we were all concerned about him the past week, but then, before he went to work yesterday, he told us to keep an eye on the news and promised that it was nothing bad…' Her tone turned sarcastic. 'That didn't worry us at all.’

‘Of course.’

‘So we kept the tv on during dinner, then all of a sudden, okaasan called my name, and I rushed in, and on the screen was Shoto using his fire to catch a villain, like some kind of fever dream!’

She hesitated then; Izuku tilted his head to the side.

‘Was that good or bad?’

‘Oh, definitely good!’ She was quick to clarify, then looked down at her noodles in thought. ‘We just… never expected it. Shoto had always been so against using it in combat. Something must’ve happened.’

She paused and slowly looked up to meet Izuku’s eyes. ‘Hang on.’

He chuckled nervously.

Her eyes narrowed. ‘You never said what your argument was about when you hung out at the house, just that you disagreed on something. Come on, spill.’

As she looked at him expectantly, Izuku tapped his index fingers together and bounced his legs under the table.

‘He kinda… told me about why he didn’t use his fire, so I kinda… to sum it up, basically called him immature and explained why he was being dumb.’

‘Izuku!’

‘I know, it was stupid, I don’t know what I was doing. I guess I was just…’ He faltered. His phone buzzed in his pocket, but he ignored it. 'I was just…'

‘Being your usual self.’ Fuyumi eventually finished for him, causing him to look at her quizzically. ‘He’s needed telling for years, but he’s stubborn and all of us were afraid of the consequences. Our family’s been through so much, we didn’t want to risk breaking it again.’

She sighed. ‘After everything that happened, I think he’d resigned himself to not using his left side… because otherwise he’d have to admit to not “giving it his all” against Touya. He didn't "try hard enough" to save him, if that makes sense?’

‘I didn’t think about that.’ Izuku murmured, guilt immediately washing over him as he slapped his forehead. ‘Of course he feels responsible for what happened, and I was so insensitive.’

He groaned, twitching as he recalled the argument. He made several more little noises of annoyance and shook his head. Fuck, it’s a wonder he doesn’t hate me…

Fuyumi regarded him carefully, chewing the inside of her cheek. She was used to his stimming by now, so didn't mention it, which he was thankful for.

‘I don’t know what you said specifically.’ She began slowly. ‘But whatever it was… it worked, so don’t beat yourself up too much like I know you’re currently doing.’

‘You know me too well.’ Izuku snorted. 'Gahhh, I just… he looked so sad and angry.'

‘He’s been sad and angry for a while, but he used to be worse.’ She conceded, but her tone wasn't accusatory. ‘Therapy has done most of the work to get him where he is today, but he’s always been so adamant about his fire… until now. You don’t need to feel bad for telling him what he needed to hear, promise.’

Izuku tightened his lips and searched her expression.

‘Are you really sure?’

She snorted.

‘If Shoto hated you, you’d know it by now.’ She told him simply. ‘Has he messaged you today?’

Izuku paused.

‘Well, yeah... He wanted to wish me luck.’

‘See?’

‘All right, all right, fine.’ Izuku smiled despite himself, as he took his phone out of his pocket. ‘It was really thoughtful-’

He paused when he realised Shoto had actually messaged him a few minutes ago.

‘Yeah, he fretted over the wording for ten minutes this morning.’ Fuyumi divulged—Izuku doubted her brother wanted him to know that little bit of information—before taking a sip from her drink. ‘So you’ve got nothing to worry about… and I know that smile, you’re looking at his messages, aren’t you?’

‘Hush.’ He stuck his tongue out, but before he could unlock his phone, one of his students suddenly appeared at his side. ‘Oh, hello, Nagisa-chan.’

‘Hi.’ She swung her arms out. ‘What happens when you die?’

Fuyumi choked on her drink, while Izuku just took a moment to process the question.

‘Erm… me specifically, or just people?’ Despite asking for clarification, the answer would remain the same: he didn’t have a clue.

‘Well, is it different for you?’ She tilted her head to the side.

Point taken.

‘I’ll be honest, Nagisa-chan, I’m not sure.’ He admitted. ‘That’s the thing about dying… you can’t really come back and let everyone know what happens.’

‘What about people who die and then they come back to life with the electric oven gloves.’

Izuku’s left eye twitched.

‘You mean a defibrillator?’ He asked, slowly.

‘I like my name better.’

‘Yeah, me too.’ Fuyumi chipped in.

Izuku hoped the name comment would distract her from the question, but alas, Nagisa continued to stare at him expectantly.

‘Er… well, I guess if they’re brought back to life, they couldn’t have been truly dead?’

‘Even Jesus?’

‘Do you… believe in Jesus?’

‘Not really.’ She sighed, looking over at where some students were playing hopscotch. ‘So what DOES happen when you die?’

Izuku bit his lip to prevent any muttering—he could go to various lengths about different religions and their beliefs, along with potential theories—but figured no one would appreciate that.

‘What do you think happens?’ He asked instead.

‘Hmmm.’ She placed a contemplative hand on her chin. ‘Probably… if you’re a good person, you turn into a dog or maybe a butterfly, but if you’re bad, you turn into… a wasp.’

‘A wasp?’

‘Yeah. No one likes wasps.’

‘What about good people who don’t like dogs?’ Fuyumi asked.

‘I guess… then maybe you turn into your favourite animal if you’re good.’ She twirled some of her hair around her finger. ‘And if you’re bad, you turn into something you don’t like.’

‘I can get behind that.’ Izuku agreed, then finally asked what had been on his mind since the start of the interaction. ‘What made you ask the question?’

‘My goldfish died last night.’ Nagisa pouted. ‘Okaasan flushed Floella down the toilet.’

‘That’s sad.’ Izuku frowned.

‘Yes, very.’ She put the hair she was playing with in her mouth and started chewing. ‘Anyway, see you later, sensei.’

Before he could say anything else, she sprinted off to join those playing hopscotch.

‘That was lovely.’ Fuyumi commented, as the two of them watched her go.

‘I think I have whiplash.’ Izuku deadpanned, before finally looking at his phone.

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1239]: Hope it’s going well

Me [1250]: So far so good! How’s work?

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1251]: On my lunch now, so can’t complain

‘Mei-chan, don’t you dare put that worm in your mouth!’ Fuyumi suddenly shouted, before bolting off towards the aforementioned student. ‘It’s every other day with this girl.’

Izuku snorted, then scanned the playground. The rest of the children seemed to be enjoying themselves, whilst most parents chatted with each other around the many picnic benches; some families stayed together, but nothing out of the ordinary.

Me [1253]: Same… 7 more minutes left tho

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1254]: That’s rough buddy

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1254]: What time do you get off?

Izuku furrowed his eyebrows.

‘Have you finished your lunch?’ Fuyumi was suddenly at his side, a little out of breath. When he nodded, she scooped up his container. ‘No problem, I’ll pop these back in the staffroom while you chat up my brother.’

‘I am not-’ He faltered when she quickly sped away out of earshot, then grumbled as he turned back to his phone. ‘I wish.’

Me [1255]: The school day finishes at 3 15 but I won’t be leaving till half past. Why?

He tapped the edge of his phone as he waited for a reply, periodically monitoring the students.

Shoto-kun 🙏 [1257]: Just wondering for when Fuyumi comes home

Izuku tried not to feel disappointed with the answer.

Me [1258]: Fair enough. Anyway, I gotta start rounding up the kids. Speak to you soon!

He quickly put his phone in his pocket and got to his feet.

Once everyone was organised and lunch was officially over, Izuku left the first graders with Fuyumi and jogged back over to the obstacle course, anticipating the fourth graders. In truth, he handled them relatively easily. They were especially boisterous, but the rowdiness didn't manifest into disobedience, and the parents watching from the sidelines cheered them on in good sport.

It wasn't until they left and grade five appeared that Izuku felt anxiety return. He tried not to let it show as he explained the rules to the students, who seemed particularly riled up, as teams All Might and Shoto were currently tying for first place.

'Ugh, I hope those annoying first graders don't ruin it for us!' One rolled his eyes, while his friend groaned with frustration.

'I bet they do! They're so useless!' Hiru hadn't provided him with names, but Izuku knew enough to suspect who the bullies were. 'Especially that mutant porcupine-'

'Have you got something you want to share with everyone?' Izuku interrupted, stern. When the rest of the grade turned to share at the duo, embarrassment flooded their cheeks and they shook their heads. Izuku tried not to pay attention to the way some parents turned to whisper to one another and even point at him. 'Well then, I hope you were discussing the rules, because it’s time to split into teams.'

His smile returned as he continued on with the event. However, his eyes did occasionally scan certain individuals for longer than he usually would.

'Is that him?' He'd hear some of the adults whisper. 'The Quirkless one?'

He'd heard similar questions and hushed comments throughout the day—not all malicious, mainly curious—but right now, Izuku was struggling to ignore them. Maybe it was because there were parents among them who were overtly and dangerously quirkist. Realistically, he knew that he was safe and that he was doing his job to the best of his ability, but he still felt like he was under the spotlight; if he fucked anything up in front of them, then he was setting a bad example for his fellow HQ community.

Luckily, whispers aside, the remaining forty five minutes passed without any incidents, and Izuku exhaled with relief once he was left to pack everything away while the students and parents made their way to the athletics track. It was only a brief interlude—it was easier putting everything away compared to setting it all up this morning—but he welcomed it all the same. It gave him a chance to briefly recharge and gather his bearings.

Once everything was sorted, he—along with a few other teachers who had also been on clean-up duty—jogged over to join the rest of the school. It was loud, many voices cheering and whooping. From the look and sound of it, the third graders were competing, which meant that there were only two more races left.

He hadn't missed the final then.

Izuku spotted the first graders sitting together with Fuyumi, and smiled as he strode over

'How's it going?' He nudged her gently and joined her on the grass, leaning back on his ankles. He tried not to alert the students of his presence so they could enjoy the race. 'Miss anything?'

'Your initial predictions were right, as usual.' She crossed her arms and nodded towards the blackboard by the finish line. 'If team Lemillion win, which looks like it's about to happen, then no matter how team Dynamight do in the grade two race, they still won't be higher than third. That puts our kids competing for the overall first place in the final round.'

'Seriously?' His eyes widened. 'I never expected it to go that smoothly, especially considering I don't know the other grades as well as ours.'

'Yeah, but I distinctly remember walking into your classroom after school to snap you out of your three hour strategizing session because housekeeping was about to kick you out.' Fuyumi shrugged. 'Once you get fixated on something, that's it, so I was pretty confident with what you'd come up with... even if it requires me having to console my poor students after their inevitable defeat.'

'Look, it's not my fault the fastest first grader is in my class.' Izuku grinned when Fuyumi mock sneered at him. 'I just hope it's worth it.'

His friend hummed, but didn't comment further, as the race came to an end. As expected, team Lemillion won—which meant both teams were out of the running for first—but that didn't prevent the second graders from giving it their absolute all in their race for third place. While that was going on though, Izuku tapped his class's four candidates on the shoulder.

'Hey, sensei!' Hana and Tomoyo both exclaimed, while Hiru waved.

'Are you here to escort us to the start line?' Touta asked, straight to the point.

'You bet I am!' He smiled, gesturing for them to get up. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed Fuyumi do the same with her students. 'Are you ready?'

'Yes!' They jumped up.

'Do your best!' Haku called out, prompting the rest of the class to shout their good luck.

'I believe in you!' Nozomi pumped her fist. 'Show them what you're made of, Hiru!'

'Gotta go fast!' The aforementioned giggled, as they made their way around the course.

Instead of the typical 400m relay, they had painted a track half the size; therefore, to run a full lap, each student participating would run 50m. It was the ideal size, as it meant everyone had enough space to spectate, including the parents.

By the time they made it to the starting line, the penultimate race concluded, as teams Dynamight and Lemillion shouted accordingly—the cheers outweighing the groans of the losing team. Izuku wasn't quite sure who had won, until he heard Tomoyo inform Touta that Lemiilion had made a last minute comeback and had beat Dynamight by one point.

'Alright, everyone!' The Head announced through a loudspeaker; Izuku winced at the volume. 'Has everyone enjoyed today?' He paused as the field filled with whoops and excited "yeah"s, before continuing. 'It's time for our final race of the day and the battle for first place! Show some support for the first graders!'

Amongst the noise, the students got into position and the first runners were given their baton.

'I was telling the others about how you can start running before your partner gets to you.' Touta informed Izuku. 'That way, there's no stopping, which could slow the race down, but I also told them not to start running too early. Don't worry, we practised yesterday during playtime!'

'Is that so?' Izuku nodded in understanding. 'How did that go?'

'Very well! I'm confident we'll win!' Touta nodded firmly, before getting on the ground into the proper position, unlike the other student, who was just standing normally and side-eyeing him.

Izuku quickly stepped to the side and gave a thumbs up. Anticipation set in as the Head counted them down, and suddenly they were running. Touta—ever idolising Ingenium—had an intense look of concentration as he hand chopped with each stride; somehow not losing the baton.

True to his word, Tomoyo started running as he came closer—not too fast and with her arm stuck out ready—and the transition was fairly smooth. Despite Touta's start, the race was still neck and neck; the class B girl running against Tomoyo was very fast—Izuku could feel Fuyumi’s smirk from here—so they quickly took the lead. His heart almost burst as Tomoyo’s face went red in her attempt to frantically catch up, but it was no use.

It wasn’t over yet though. Once the baton went to Hana, they were able to make back some of the gap. By this point, everyone was cheering and shouting—Izuku included, whilst trying not to let the desperation show in his voice—hoping for victory. Hana did well to pick up their pace, and once Hiru started running, nothing could stop him; he easily overtook his opponent and sprinted towards the finish line. His quills shook where his sports shirt had been modified, his nose bounced with each step, but his face was determined, focusing only on one goal.

Izuku looked around him, searching everyone else’s expressions. Most were watching with amazement, others with delight, whilst those on team Shoto were clutching their heads in anguish. When his eyes scanned over the fifth graders from earlier, he was glad to see them staring at Hiru with wide eyes; their mouths agape with shock. That was progress, at least, and when Hiru crossed the finish line—an easy victory—they punched their fists in the air and cheered with everyone else.

Izuku let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding and turned back to Hiru—who was being crowded by the rest of class A—and joined them in their congratulations, making sure to commend the other runners as well. The background noise all mingled into one, so once he'd said his piece, Izuku made his way back to Fuyumi, a smile on his face…

Until he passed the adults.

'To let a mutant participate in this event is ridiculous.' He overheard one of the parents complain. 'They clearly have an unfair advantage.'

‘Exactly! That’s what I’ve been saying for the past three years!’ Another chimed in. 'They should have their own category or something, especially when the normal kids aren't allowed to use their quirks.'

Izuku's jaw tightened and he turned.

'Excuse my intrusion.' His heart pounded against his chest. What was he doing? 'But I hardly think a children's sports day warrants any extra categories based purely on physical attributes—we don’t split the beanbag toss up depending on height, after all. Plus, one member of class B's relay team also had a heteromorph quirk, so I don't think there was any "unfair" advantage.'

'Of course you would think that.' The first parent rolled her eyes. 'Everyone has an advantage over someone quirkless, so it's all the same to you.'

Wow, no hesitation there.

That stung, but Izuku wasn't about to submit.

'I have a joint-honours degree in both teaching and quirk studies, with a postgraduate specialisation in the development of quirks.' He replied, easily. 'So I don't think you can just write me off as not knowing what I'm talking about simply because I'm quirkless, which is a prejudiced argument if I've ever heard one.'

'Well if you're so smart, then you should know about how these genetic mutations are illnesses-'

'Illnesses?' He couldn't help but scoff. 'Do you believe everything Speak Out tell you? Do you know the studies they cite are super dodgy and often anecdotal?'

'That's because the scientists doing peer reviews are politically motivated.'

'No, it's because the studies' methods are shi- rubbish, and the word "illness" is thrown around too liberally.' Izuku remained steadfast. Luckily, they hadn't attracted a crowd yet, but he could tell some of the other parents were looking at them. 'Anyone with critical thinking knows that.'

'Are you saying I have no critical thinking?'

'Well, if the shoe f-'

'Midoriya-sensei.' Fuyumi suddenly appeared at his side, her smile placating. 'Why don't you let me take over? Kimura-san and Shimizu-san’s children are in my class. I'll meet you in the staffroom.'

She looked at him deliberately, but Izuku didn't retreat straight away. He held her gaze for a few seconds first, clearly not happy about the situation.

'Alright.'

Casting the parents one final glance, he took his leave. As he made his way through the crowd though, he clenched his fists tightly and bit the inside of his cheek to prevent any angry muttering.

It's always one step forward, two fucking steps back.

***

'So, you told me to ask again in eight hours.' Fuyumi said as they walked out of the school building. 'How're you doing?'

Izuku sighed, kicking a small stone.

'At least the kids are acting in a friendly way.' He tried to focus on the positives. 'Those fifth graders even called Hiru cool.'

'Yes… But that's not what's on your mind.' Fuyumi stated pointedly. 'It's that conversation with the parents that would’ve escalated if I hadn’t intervened.'

Izuku chuckled humorlessly, still staring at the ground.

'You got me.' He conceded, spreading his palms in surrender. 'It was just so frustrating.'

'I know.' Fuyumi waved at the school caretaker over by the bins, prompting Izuku to also wave politely. 'I wasn't able to talk much sense into them after you left, I'll be honest, but I pointed them to the information session we'll be hosting—they said they'll be there.'

'Yay.'

'You stop that now.' She swatted him without any real malice. 'You were the one who…'

Izuku turned to look at her when she trailed off, only to find her staring at the school gate, mouth agape. Confused, he followed her gaze and baulked when he saw red and white hair.

'Shoto-kun?'

The aforementioned was leant against the wall, still in his hero costume, and scrolling through his phone. When he noticed them approaching, however, he pocketed the device and nodded in greeting.

'What a lovely surprise.' Fuyumi sounded almost amused. 'What brings you to this side of the world?'

'Midoriya told me what time you'd both be finishing, so I thought I'd walk home with you.' Shoto answered easily, like this was perfectly normal behaviour. 'I figured if he was going to scream at me, may as well do it in front of an audience.'

'Scream?' Izuku took a moment to process what he meant. 'Ooooh, the texts. I said I'd scream at him next time I saw him because he used his fire… Good screaming.'

'I was beginning to worry.' Fuyumi snorted. 'Good idea. Izuku could definitely do to let off some steam with a distraction.'

Shoto's expression immediately shifted into concern.

'That bad?'

Izuku sighed.

'I'll tell you about it later, but for now…' He paused for dramatic effect. 'Tell me everything about your fire!'

By the time they parted ways—the Todorokis turning left at the crossroads and Izuku going straight on—he couldn't deny he was definitely in a better mood than he had been an hour ago.

[tanenigiri]

Last one. (Or second to the last? I saw the posts about a "spin-off" episode.) And it ends on a very high note.

Thoughts and ramblings on Our Dining Table's 10th and final episode under the cut.

Okay so I was mentally preparing myself for that scene between Yutaka and Ueda-san because I knew it was coming, and when I first read it in the manga I broke down crying because of how unprepared I was to feel all those emotions when I was already a mess after the backstories and the confessions. And yet, even when I was psyching up about it for this show, I still had to pause and take a minute because it is SUCH a heavy scene that it still gets me. But at the same time, I really can't imagine myself loving this series as much as I do right now if it didn't have this scene, as it makes for such a great "conclusion" to a lot of the series' story arcs. I use conclusion very liberally here as what Ueda-san brings to the table isn't really anything final, but there is absolutely a weight off Yutaka's shoulders after that much-needed conversation.

I've seen a lot of posts about Ueda-san being the best BL dad, and considering that most of the other manga I've read either have absent fathers or ones that reject their sons' identities, I'm very much inclined to agree. This was absolutely his episode and he knocked it out of the park.

Of course, there's that final conversation outside Tane's school, which was a bit of a change from the manga as its equivalent scene took place in the ramen shop Minoru works in. Still, the essence was pretty much the same, and I think the show actually made this scene a lot more powerful because of that bit where Tane calls Yutaka family. Absolutely didn't expect that and I was floored at how this four-year-old (at least in the manga) can make me cry just like that. I think this is just as important for Yutaka as Minoru's confession, and I'm not at all surprised that this eventually leads to Yutaka declaring (and cementing) his own love.

I'm really glad that we got that short scene about Yutaka's officemates noticing his change. This was one of my biggest wishes going into this series and I'm so glad that they brought it up several times. Sure, Ohata says the same thing in the previous episode, but I think it's a lot more telling that people who aren't as close to Yutaka have noticed it too.

Speaking of which, the one complaint I have about this episode is how Ohata didn't get a line lol the queen deserved a scene! But I'm glad that they gave the rest of the co-workers some screen time. (And she already got her spotlight in Episode 9 anyway.)

The establishing scenes at the start were also a bit funny to me as I thought they were, I guess for the lack of a better word, too on the nose? Like okay, we get it, Yutaka's thinking about loss, you don't have to hammer it in.

If it wasn't obvious from how much I've been gushing about it, Our Dining Table is my favorite out of all the manga I've read so far, and I'm so, so happy with how the show turned out. There's a lot of heart put into it, and it not only did the manga's story justice but even elevated it in certain aspects. And while I do have some reservations about certain things that the show did, I'm actually glad those exist, as a "perfect" show would be quite boring to obsess over.

Thanks to everyone who've been reading these ramblings the past few weeks! I'm so glad to find more people who love this series as much as I do. If you haven't read the manga yet, I whole-heartedly recommend it!

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

The Virus.

Can I get you boys anything before we start this? Like, a drink or something?

I’ll take some bottled water, if that’s alright.

*Koichi tosses Rantaro a bottle of water. He opens the cap and starts to drink it.

Thank you for your willingness to cooperate. To be honest, I was getting ready to put up a fight...

A fight, eh?

Not a physical altercation, of course! More of a verbal one.

Same here. We need you to explain everything, but we also need you a few simple questions. Why did the Future Foundation build such a high profile lab, and what were they doing in there?

Also, why are there no records of the lab ever being built? Who was in charge and why was it hidden.

*sigh* Alright, I guess I should start from the beginning.

*Koichi sits down on a sofa opposite Shuichi and Rantaro, and begins to explain.

Back when the tragedy first started, Junko Enoshima and the Ultimate Despair did a variety of things to try and bring Despair to the world. From noxious gas machines, to unadulterated terrorism, and so many other things. But there’s one thing that they did during that time that doesn’t get talked about very much.

And that would be what?

The development and spreading of rare diseases around the world. The toxic atmosphere at the time made it all the more easier for sicknesses to spread.

Yes...but most of the illnesses that were housed and spread by the Remnants and those who went insane in the tragedy were fairly basic. Definitely deadly under the right circumstances, and many people succumbed to them, but...

Very curable with the right treatment, right?

Yes...But a part of me thinks that Junko knew that, which is why she...

Why she what?

...

*Koichi pauses, resting his head in his hands shamefully.

Mr Kizakura, what’s the matter?

Sorry...Thinking about all of it just...leaves me in a pretty terrible state of mind.

What could be so bad that even YOU’RE affected by it?

I’m glad you think so highly of me, Mr Saihara. I’ll tell you...

Junko Enoshima created a NEW type of virus. One that didn’t have a cure, as far as we were aware at least.

What!? A new type of virus...!?

Yeah...And I’ll give her credit, she was crafty...And her title of Ultimate Despair is not lost on her.

What did she do?

You know how Junko likes to do this thing where when you think all is well and good in the world she likes to swipe it all from under your feet? Well, this was no different.

She KNEW that people would be admitted into hospitals, for a variety of reasons. Wounds from the rampaging mobs and killer robots, long term health illnesses that were made worse from the atmosphere, and obviously all the other viruses that ran rampant in the tragedy.

...Don’t tell me she...!?

Junko knew this...so as part of her plan to bring humanity to it’s knees...

She sent bags of this virus to every hospital across the world, and had her followers smuggle them into the healthcare system. If anyone needed a transfusion of any kind, they would instead have been infected by pure concentration of Junko’s virus.

What the hell...!?

Wait...Now that I think about it...I remember reading basically every file in the Future Foundation’s archives within the first three weeks I was working at the Foundation. I have a pretty good memory and can retain a lot of information, and...

I actually think I remember something like it coming up...I believe the Foundation officials at the time called it the “Enoshima Virus” or something like that!

Personally, I wish they’d picked a more creative name, but yeah, that’s the one I’m talking about. So you already know about this virus?

Yeah, but only a little bit. A treatment was never found, like he just said, but it didn’t matter in the end.

Junko’s followers weren’t particularly careful about covering their tracks. In the file I read, the report stated that every and all samples of the virus were tracked down and disposed off before they could be distributed. Future Foundation caught onto the problem early enough, and it didn’t end up spiraling out of control. Junko’s plan to infect people with this virus of hers failed.

Though, this is the first I’m hearing of the virus being developed by Junko herself. I thought she just sampled it and tried to spread it through hospital systems.

That’s screwed up, either way...

That should’ve been the end of it...It’s like Shuichi said, the Future Foundation dealt with the virus before it could spiral out of control...Or so we thought.

Wh-What happened...?

...Put simply...we missed some...And by the time we realized that, it was already too late.

Missed some? How?

Hospital errors. Turns out there were a small variety of transfusions and cases in the hospitals that, because of certain circumstances, went unrecorded...And because of that...

Because of that...the virus spread after all?

Yes...in the end, 5 people from around the world were infected, and went untreated for too long. And only then...

...Only then did we truly see what this virus did. And it was the most horrifying thing I’ve ever seen.

Wh-What...!?

The first patient we found was already in critical condition by the time we found him...We apprehended him after the Foundation tracked him down, as he was under suspicion of having forced 5 different families into attempted suicide. Which, by the way, we found out to be true in the end.

What...!? Wh-Why would he do that!?

I asked the same thing myself, but we got our answer soon enough, and it was the worst possible scenario...We found that he was infected with Junko’s virus, and decided to do more research with the samples of it we had yet to destroy...And that’s when we discovered the primary ingredient...

Junko’s blood.

Junko created a virus using her own blood...!? Wh-What happened!?

I...I couldn’t look at the first patient for too long when the Foundation apprehended him. I was given some background information and official profile pictures on him when he was apprehended. Originally he had black hair and dark brown eyes...

But when he was brought to a Foundation holding facility, he couldn’t have looked more different. His eyes were now a bright blue, and his hair turned blonde...

!!?

I see you’ve already realized where I’m going with this.

No...You can’t possible mean...!?

This virus...it was turning people into...!?

Yeah...

It was turning people INTO Junko! Not only did the subject take on her appearance, but also her mannerisms, and manipulative, psychotic personality. I think this may have been her way of reproducing, even after death.

As if it wasn’t bad enough that the AI version of her tried to corrupt all of humanity, turns out she had this as a backup. Even if she was to die, these people would adopt her personality, and pick up where she left off.

And thus, a small group of Foundation researchers and scientists, in response to this issue, built the very same lab your friend is currently trapped inside, to contaminate, and find a way to cure the people affected. Two of the people brought onto the project, were myself and Ms Chisa Yukizome.

My job was simply to scour the world, and track down all the people who were infected by Junko’s virus. Then, bring them to the lab in Japan for the scientists to test on. After all, my Ultimate Scout talent’s gotta be useful for something these days, right?

I don’t understand! This seems like a MASSIVE crisis! Why was this hidden from the Foundation at large!?

And more importantly, HOW?

Isn’t that obvious? It was due to the influence of the man leading the project. The chief.

Yes...Yukizome’s file mentioned a chief of operations. Who was it?

Hmph...who else? There was only one man in the entire Foundation who could sweep an incident like this under the rug, without the world and Foundation at large knowing about it.

Who?

...Kazuo Tengan...

Shuichi: Tengan...He’s...

Koichi: Technically speaking, he’s the first chairman and founder of the Future Foundation. Many people think Munakata is the first due to him leading more operations during the early days, but in reality, Munakata only technically became Chairman following Munakata’s death.

Rantaro: Only after Munakata left the Foundation did Kyoko take the position of Chairwoman. And you’re telling me that Tengan was the one responsible for taking care of these infected?

Koichi: Thanks to his influence, it was easy to do all of it behind Munakata and the Foundation at large’s back. Still, given that we all know that him and Yukizome fell to Despair a while ago, it’s hard to know exactly what either of them were thinking.

Maybe part of his plan was to keep the subjects contained, then unleash them on the world should it ever come close to a sense of normalcy again?

Perhaps...But clearly, fate didn’t plan to wait that long.

What do you mean?

Do you want to know how that whole incident ended? And what ended up happening to the lab and the subjects?

...Yes. I would like to know very much.

Well, I’ll tell you what I can. To be honest, after I tracked down Subject 5, and brought him into the lab, I decided to back out of the project, and retire.  I...I couldn’t stand to look at these people suffering, through no fault of their own. They were just unlucky enough to become infected.

If I recall, Subject 5 was mentioned on the report Kaede found...Said that he was an elementary school student who murdered three of his classmates on a train, in broad daylight and in front of many people.

Yeah...He was an 8 year old kid too. Never learned his name, just found out he was infected and carted him over to the scientists. By the time I found that out, I’d had enough, and bailed.

Still kept it a secret though. I thought Tengan was doing a good thing trying to save these people, so I just let him be. Had no idea what was going on with him and Chisa at the time.

That’s fair. But...what happened after that?

I was called back by Chisa in regards to the incident. A month or so after the final subject was brought in...something went horribly wrong.

...Go on.

The way I understand it...Subject 5 had a strange and unnatural reaction to the treatment they were giving him. It had a different effect on his body compared to the other three. We never got a chance to figure out why.

Why not?

...

Every person in that lab at the time...The scientists, researchers and even the other 4 test subjects...

In the space of a single night...they were all MURDERED by Subject 5...!

!!!!???

!!!!???

*Rantaro drops his bottle of water in shock, and what’s left of the contents spills out onto the rug.

That...That’s IMPOSSIBLE!

Yeah, that doesn’t make any sense! Are you seriously trying to tell me that an entire conglomerate of people, including what I assume would be high profile soldiers...were murdered by an 8 YEAR OLD BOY!?

Yes.

...!?

Such confidence in your answer...!? You’re not kidding us, are you?

I might be a bit of a sleazeball, but I don’t talk about genocide lightly. The catastrophe I saw when I returned to the lab spoke for itself. Clearly, Subject 5 had inherited Junko’s unbridled passion for violence, and executed it...by executing everyone else.

And that kid...Like I said, he wasn’t normal. Something happened to his body when he received the required medicine, which made him more rabid...stronger...and more dangerous.

But...so many Foundation members must have been reported missing overnight if that’s the case. There’s no way in hell Tengan could have covered that up!

Oh, but that’s where you’re wrong. Tengan had the lab closed following Subject 5′s genocide, and the Foundation never had a chance to document all the missing persons...

Why not?

Because almost immediately after the lab closed...

The Final Killing Game began...

Tengan used his KILLING GAME as a COVER STORY!?

Part of me thinks that covering up the existence of the lab may have been the REAL reason Tengan orchestrated that game in the first place. An incident on a more dramatic scale to cover up a previous one.

Thus...only one person who knew of the lab, that still remains alive to this day...is me.

Why did you never tell Kyoko?

I couldn’t! The incident ended the night all those men died, and Kyoko had too much to deal with upon taking the mantle of chairwoman. I never intended to hide this forever, but long enough where the Foundation didn’t have any problems left.

...I have just one more question, Mr Kizakura...

After the incident that caused the lab to be shut down...What happened to Subject 5? Was he executed?

...I have no idea.

What!?

Wh-What do you mean you have no idea...!? 

Subject 5 escaped from the lab, and vanished into the night when he murdered everyone in his way. That was the last anyone ever heard of him. We never caught him, nor saw from him again.

So...either he somehow died and no one ever found out his true identity...or...

*Shuichi and Rantaro both look out the window.

He’s still out there somewhere...!

[middleearthpixie]

After the Fire ~ Chapter Thirty

Summary: Following the Battle of the Five Armies, a grievously wounded Thorin is brought back to the kingdom of Erebor, which is still mostly in ruins. Although he’s survived the wounds he received at the end of Azog’s blade, his recovery is far from complete. Grief, regret, anger, all are making his journey that much more difficult and the physical recovery isn’t quite the most difficult challenge he faces.

Jasna Stoneham is no stranger to loss, as she is a survivor of Smaug’s wrath upon Esgaroth. When she is asked to help the dwarves healers of Erebor, her instinct is to say no, but she needs the job, and so agrees to it. However, no one told her that of all the patients, she would be responsible for the king himself, Thorin Oakenshield. 

Unfortunately, the road to recovery isn’t necessary a smooth one, but if there’s one thing Thorin will learn, it’s that Jasna is just as stubborn as he is and for every step back he takes, she is there to push him three steps forward. And Jasna will soon find out that there is a gentle, softer side to the dwarf king, one that very few people have ever seen and one he fights to keep hidden from her as well. But like his recovery, that is also easier said than done. 

Thorin finally works up the courage to tell Jasna about the law forbidding their marriage…

Pairing: Thorin Oakenshield x ofc Jasna Stoneham

Characters: Jasna, Thorin, Shael, Mr. Whitbow, Mrs. Whitbow 

Warnings: Oral sex (f receiving,) unprotected intercourse

Rating: M

Word Count: 4,732

Tag List: @tschrist1 @i-did-not-mean-to @lathalea @linasofia @fizzyxcustard @legolasbadass @kibleedibleedoo @xxbyimm @arrthurpendragon @exhausted-humxn-being @rachel1959 @laurfilijames @sketch-and-write-lover @sherala007 @enchantzz @knitastically @notlostgnome @myselfandfantasy @medusas-hairband @guardianofrivendell @jotink78 @sorisooyaa @ruthoakenshield @quiall321 @dianakc

If you’d like to be added (or removed) to the tag list, please just let me know!

Previous chapters can be found here. 

Jasna hummed softly to herself as she made her way along the corridor from the therapy room, the tune dying on her lips as Shael emerged from the Great Hall and looked directly at her. Jasna offered up a smile as she said, “Good evening.”

“How are you, Miss Stoneham?”

“Please, Jasna is fine and I’m well. And yourself?”

“I’ve had better weeks.”

Guilt pricked at Jana’s insides, which was silly, really. She hadn’t done anything wrong and neither had Thorin. One certainly couldn’t control what their heart wanted and one had very little control in with whom they fell in love. 

Still, she was the reason why Shael would not be marrying Thorin and while Jasna would be lying if she said she wasn’t unhappy about that, she also didn't want Shael to suffer, either. She knew full well what it was like to lose Thorin. She sympathized with her one-time rival.

“I wish there was something I could d-d-do or say that wouldn’t s-s-sound tr-tr-trite or silly.”

“I know, and I don’t fault you. Well, not entirely, if I’m being totally honest.” A hint of color rose in Shael’s cheeks. “And if I’m being absolutely honest, I’d confess that Thorin and I would most likely never suit one another. At least, not the way you and he do.”

Jasna wasn't at all certain how to respond to that. She cleared her throat. “I n-n-never meant f-f-for this to h-h-happen, Miss Whitbow.”

“I know. And I understand. And please,” she managed a smile, “call me Shael. We aren’t enemies, after all.”

“I’m glad. That we aren’t, I mean.” She smiled as Fíli wheeled toward them, pausing long enough to wave before he steered himself into the Great Hall. 

“I heard he was up and walking today,” Shael remarked, nodding in Fíli’s direction.

“He was, and he was doing wonderfully, actually.” Jasna smiled. “It won’t be long before he’s up and on his feet entirely on his own and he won’t need me any longer.”

“I spoke to him earlier.” Shael turned back toward her. “He’s grown up since I last saw him. Between him and his brother, they would tease a girl almost until she cried at one point. I don’t get that feeling about him any longer.”

“He’s been through much.” Jasna peered around the corner into the Great Hall, watching as Fíli wheeled over to where Dís sat. Then she leaned back. “You should go and sit with them. I’d wager he’d l-l-love the company.”

She bit back her smile as a hint of blush crept along Shael’s cheekbones. “Do you think so?”

“I do, yes. He could use all of the friends he can g-get.”

“Shael, there you are!” 

“Mother, where else would I be?” Shael’s voice rang with exasperation as they were joined by two more dwarves, neither of whom Jasna recognized. “Mother, Father, this is Miss Stoneham. Miss St—”

“We know who she is,” Mrs. Whitbow said, a hint of smug superiority in her voice. “The interloper from Esgaroth.”

“Mother!”

Jasna’s cheeks grew warm but she refused to give either one of them the satisfaction of looking anywhere but directly at them. The tiniest hint of triumph shot through her when Shael’s mother averted her gaze within seconds. A small victory, but a victory just the same. 

“Now, now, Ellisar,” Mr. Whitbow broke in jovially, his dark eyes nowhere near as warm as his voice, “this is neither the time nor the place.”

“Miss Stoneham has done nothing to warrant a drop of anger from you or Father,” Shael told her sternly. “And I’ll not stand by and let you be angry on my behalf when I am the one to urged Thorin to make things right with her because he belongs with her, and she with him.”

“Be that as it may,” Mr. Whitbow replied, giving Jasna a long up and down stare that made her uneasy for reasons she couldn’t explain, “she has no place among us here.”

“No, she certainly does not, Garrik,” Mrs. Whitbow sniffed. “Thorin is making a terrible mistake.”

“Mother, I mean it,” Shael growled, narrowing her eyes at her parents. “Now, behave or I swear to you, I’ll run off with the first Man I see when Miss Stoneham and I go into Dale tomorrow.”

Jasna hoped her confusion didn't show on her face, for she had no idea what Shael was going on about. They had made no plans to go into Dale. This was the first time she’d even spoken to Shael alone since she returned to Erebor. 

Still, that didn't stop her from saying, “I do know where we m-m-m-might f-f-find you an eligible bachelor or two. Perhaps more. Especially in the taverns.”

The looks of horror on both faces was enough to very nearly make her smile, but she managed to hold it back as Shael said, “Good. That will be the first place we go, then.”

Mrs. Whitbow sniffed and grabbed her husband’s arm. “Come along, Garrik. I find myself in need of wine.”

“Or something stronger.” 

Jasna pressed her lips together as they stomped off, and once they were out of earshot, Shael grabbed her by the arm and tucked her head against Jasna’s shoulder. “Thank you, Miss—Jasna… I appreciate your quick thinking.”

“It isn’t a problem, and I d-d-do know where we might find them, but we don’t have pl-plans to go into Dale.”

“I almost wish we did.” Shael sighed softly, glancing back into the Great Hall and as she followed her line of sight Jasna saw who’d caught her attention.

“If you like,” she said, leaning closer so no one could overhear them, “I think Fíli could use a bit of a cheering section during our sessions, if y-y-you’d like to sit in with us.”

“Oh, I’d hate to impose.”

“I don’t think you’d be imposing at all. H-h-he must grow t-t-tired of having only me or Narnerra or Óin to l-look at.”

Shael’s eyes almost sparkled. “Would you do that?”

“I would, yes.” Jasna nodded. “I’ll be s-s-seeing him around noon. So, if you h-h-happen to be in the area…”

“Thank you, Jasna. That’s very sweet of you.”

“Think nothing of it.” Jasna looked back into the Great Hall once more. “I think your p-p-parents are waiting for you.”

“Ugh.” Shael let out a heavy exhale and then added, “I suppose I should join them. But, I will see you tomorrow.”

“Noon.”

“Noon.”

With that, Shael made her way into the Great Hall, and Jasna sighed softly, the last of her guilt fading away. Hopefully, Fíli and Shael would get on wonderfully. They both deserved a bit of happiness. 

That in mind, Jasna continued on toward the main staircase, sigh of relief bubbling at her lips when she found herself at Thorin’s door. 

Her hear beat faster now as she stared at the plain, almost boring, dark wood. Her blood roared through her ears, pounded through her temples, and her mouth went so dry, it was painful to swallow. Which was all so silly because although they weren’t married yet, it was coming, so there was no danger—aside from embarrassment—should someone happen upon her standing there. 

Her hand trembled as she balled it and rapped lightly on the door. 

“Who goes?”

“Thorin?”

“Come in.”

She could almost hear the smile in his voice and when she turned the handle, it made not a sound, and neither did the door itself when she pushed it open. Her heart slammed against her ribs, but her feet propelled her forward, into his chambers. 

Soft, buttery light glowed from the myriad of candles flickering all around her, bathing the room—and Thorin—warm and gold. His eyes glittered as he smiled and crossed over to her. “I thought perhaps you’d changed your mind.”

“No, of course not. I—I was playing matchmaker, b-believe it or not.”

“Matchmaker?”

She nodded. “I h-h-hope you don’t mind.”

“Why would I?” He eased his arms about her waist. “I mean, unless you were playing matchmaker for yourself.”

“Funny. No,” she slid her arms about his midsection as well, “for Miss Whitbow.”

“What?”

“I thought she and Fíli might hit it off with one another.”

He said nothing at first, and for a moment, she thought perhaps she’d made a mistake, but then he nodded slowly. “She would be perfect for him.”

“I thought so. Now, we just have to h-hope he agrees.”

“We can worry about that come the morning. I’ve sent word to Dale that the future queen will be passing the night here. I’ve assured your mother that you will be safe and sound under my sister’s watchful eye and she need not worry about you at all. Although, I wonder if I should reiterate about her coming to stay here so you can remain here.”

“What?”

“I don’t want to be away from you any more than I absolutely have to be. If it means sharing a roof with my future mother-in-law, who already doesn’t seem to really care for me all that much, I’ll make the sacrifice.”

She smiled up at him. “You would?”

“Absolutely.” He bent toward her, his lips brushing hers as he whispered, “There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you, amrâlimê.”

She melted again him as his lips came softly upon hers. He caught her face between his massive palms, his fingers stretching up into her hair as he angled her just so to deepen his kiss. Long. Slow. Deep. She felt that kiss through to the center of her being. His tongue teased hers, tangled with it to draw back into the welcoming warmth of his mouth and without thinking, she arched her back, pressed her breasts gently into his chest, shivering at the tingle rippling through her from the contact.

His kiss left her lightheaded and drowsy, but that drowsiness fled as he pulled back and with a wicked smile, caught the bottom of her tunic to draw it up and over her head. He let it fall to the sofa in a crumple of dark gray cotton and his eyes visibly darkened as they roamed over her, as he caught the ribbon lacing her half-chemise closed and pulled to draw the bow free. 

The linen skimmed along her like a caress, soft and teasing, and it joined her tunic on the sofa. “Abnâmul,” he growled, cupping her left breast in his gentle palm. 

She bit down on her bottom lip at the soft zing of pleasure that shot through her when his thumb slid lazily about her nipple. Without thinking, she caught her bottom lip between her teeth, her nippled beading into an all-too sensitive nub that he continued to torture so sensually. 

He loomed over her, bending once more to capture her lips even as he continued to roll that nipple between his thumb and forefinger. As he cupped her other breast and did the same. Deep within, she began that slow, delicious melt of desire. She shivered beneath his kiss, beneath his caresses, her head spinning madly, her eyes happy to be closed as fire wound through her. 

Thorin swept a kiss down over her chin, along the front of her neck, into the shadow between her breasts. His hands slid away, to the fastenings of her trousers as he captured one aching nipple between his lips to flay it with the tip of his tongue. Her fingers sank into his hair, twisting as he caught that nipple between his teeth and fluttered the tip of his tongue over it.

“Thorin…” His name was an airy whisper, more steam that substance, and she shivered as he hooked his thumbs and forefingers in the waist of her trousers. The soft linen swept along her skin, his fingertips brushed the backs of her thighs, and to her surprise, he released her breast to kiss his way down along her belly as he sank to his knees before her.

 He looked up at her then and her heart almost stopped at the wonder, at the desire, in his eyes, which had gone sapphire with desire. “I love you,” he whispered, his voice oddly husky, holding her gaze even as he slid one hand down the back of her calf and caught her ankle to lift her foot enough to tug her trousers from it.

Although his chambers weren’t cold, she shivered. “What are you about?”

“I’ve thought about this since the morning I let you out of my bed,” he replied, catching her other ankle now to tug her trousers completely free. 

“Thought about w-w-what?”

His grin grew wicked and seductive. “You will see soon enough, mesmel.”

With that, he leaned close and she sucked in a sharp breath as he nuzzled the coppery curls between her thighs. Then, without warning, his tongue slipped into those curls.

“Oh!” Her gasp rang out as he offered up a slow, sensual stroke, and pleasure unlike anything she’d ever felt before shot through her. Soft and teasing at first, it soon grew sharp and spiky and hot, twisting her insides into the tightest, most delicious knots she’d ever felt. Her knees threatened to go to sponge. Her breath became impossible to catch. Her entire body trembled from the white-hot bliss spiraling through her. Of their own accord, her hips rolled toward him, her fingers tightening in his hair when that only sharpened the pleasure more.

He moved with slow surety, not at all hesitant about stroking, tasting, teasing, swirling, or sucking. Her legs trembled as the slow roll of her climax made its way toward her. It started slow. Slow. Tingly. Delicious.

But then he moved, lifting his head to murmur, “Sit for me…”

She practically dropped onto the sofa and gasped once more as he maneuvered her legs over his shoulders and dove back to meet her. He feasted greedily, not letting up as the spikes grew sharper, as her legs trembled and her body tensed. Her head spun, her fingers tightened and pulled his hair as she arched to meet each utterly wicked, utterly wonderful stroke. 

The wave rose as it sped toward her, the tension winding through her until she thought she’d shatter if he didn't do something to offer her some sort of relief.

But then he did.

The blaze erupted, spilling white-hot pleasure, fiery desire, plaintive need through her entire body. Her core melted. The knots pulled taut, threatening to drive her into madness at any moment.

Then he shattered her.

The eruption was swift and hard, knots bursting as one to make lights dance and flash before her eyes as she bolted to meet him with a hoarse, “Thorin!” and with each delicious pulse between her thighs, she shivered and moaned as her body pulsed beneath his tongue.

The wave receded, leaving her fighting for air, limp and languid against the sofa cushions as he slowed his tongue, then moved to press a kiss into those curls once more. Then into her thigh. Her belly. Her breastbone.

He came up to capture her lips and she savored his kiss, the sultry taste of herself on his lips, on his tongue, as she wrapped herself about him and ground into that already-bulging part of him she so desperately wanted now.

Thorin maneuvered her lengthwise on the sofa, slipped a hand between them, opened his trousers, freed himself and then—

“Jasna!” His voice echoed about them as he found her, slick and hot, and surged deep inside her. His first thrust was silken, her arousal, her release, readied her for him, and they moved together in perfect rhythm. 

She wrapped her arms about his neck, clinging to him as his thrusts grew more powerful, as he growled her name and surged hard, surged deep. She melted around him again as another climax swelled and when he found his pleasure, it triggered hers once more and they came together in a crescendo of mutual bliss, mutual desire, and mutual satisfaction.

He shuddered against her, a low, sensual moan on his lips as his body spilled into hers and she couldn't hold back her airy, “Thorin,” as he finally went still against her, burying his face in the slope of her neck.

“Jasna… amrâlimê… you are not leaving here again. I hope you know that.”

“Here?”

“My bed, my sofa, wherever,” he murmured, still out of breath. “I will not let you leave it again. Quite possibly ever.”

“Thorin.”

He lifted his head and smiled. “What?”

“I cannot stay here forever, you know.”

“Of course you can. No one comes in without an invitation and I won’t let anyone else in.” 

“That isn’t exactly practical, you know.” She tucked a wayward silver-streaked dark curl behind his ear. 

His smile faded and as his expression grew more serious, a hint of unease flickered thorough her. “Thorin, what is it?”

“What is what?”

“You look as if you’ve something on your mind. What troubles you?”

He met her gaze, his eyes far more serious than she’d seen since his early days in the infirmary, when he was so very worried about his nephews. “There are a few matters we need to discuss. Regarding the wedding.”

“Serious matters?”

“Serious enough, yes.”

“Can they wait at least until morning?”

“Jasna, I—”

She smiled, tracing her forefinger along the silvery patch in his beard. “Because we are having such a lovely time and I’d hate to ruin it with unnecessary seriousness if we can possibly avoid it.”

“I understand, but we should—”

“Besides,” she braced her hands on his chest and pushed to urge him onto his back. When he obliged, she eased over him, sweeping her lips up along the side of his neck, smiling at the teasing prickle of his beard scruff against her lips, “there is something I wish to give you as well…”

As she spoke, she swept her lips back down now, along his neck, over his chest, down his belly.

“Jasna…” His voice was little more than a husky whisper as she reached what she sought and bent to close her lips about him. He sucked in a sharp breath, his hands plunging into her hair, his hips bolting up to meet her. “Mesmel, wait… we really need to ta—oooh!”

But then, he pulled away, rather roughly, and growled, “No, Jasna, we—oh, Mahal—we need to talk…” He carefully eased himself out from under her and sat up against the sofa’s arm. “And as nice as that was and as much as I would enjoy it, this cannot wait.”

“Thorin?” Her belly kinked at the seriousness in his voice, in his eyes, and somehow, she just knew she wasn’t going to like what he was about to say. “What is it?”

He didn't respond at first and to her discomfort, instead rose, refastening his trousers and when he turned toward her, Jasna felt as if she might be sick. 

“You look so serious,” she said, trying to ignore the stronger bubbling in her belly. “What is it?”

“Jasna, I just… I don’t know how to even begin with this, actually.”

“Just say it.” Her blood pounded through her temples, roared through her ears, at how his expression changed. Gone were the sleepy, heavy-lidded eyes that spoke of sinful promise. No longer sapphire from passion, his eyes were once more pale blue, but with something that looked very much like regret swirling within them. “Thorin?”

He sank onto the sofa’s arm, his clasped hands tucked between his massive thighs, and what looked like pain filled his blue eyes as he lifted them to her. “I was speaking with Balin yesterday and… I—that is, we—”

Her blood roared through her ears and when she swallowed, they actually popped. “Speaking with Balin? Whatever for?”

He didn't respond at first, but stared down at his huge hands, as if suddenly fascinated by the heavy rings on his middle and ring fingers of both hands. The torchlight from the sconces high on the wall above them danced along his dark hair, glinted off the silver woven through it.

Her stomach actually hurt now. She fished her tunic from the floor and dragged it over her head, then got to her feet. She stepped closer, letting her hands come to rest on his head, her fingers gliding along the soft curls. “Thorin, what it is? Please, tell me. You’re w-w-worrying me.”

He looked up once more. “Ereborian law will not permit me to marry a non-dwarf,” he murmured. “I mean, not if I wish to remain on the throne.”

Those words were like a blow to the gut, driving the air from her body in one thunderous blow. Fortunately, she didn't gasp, nor did she flinch, but at the same time, she did wince. “You sp-sp-spoke to him yesterday?”

No. He did not use her again. Her eyes stung already, although he had confirmed nothing. Was Mama right? Was she a fool to believe him? It certainly began to feel that way. “Thorin?”

“I did, yes.” He spoke slowly, as if trying to gage how furious she might grow. 

She looked away briefly, toward the rumpled and squished sofa cushions that bore the brunt of their desire, their need for one another. Her mind raced with everything that had happened since she’d returned to Erebor as his fiancée.

Or had she, in fact, returned as such?

She swallowed hard despite the sudden dryness in her throat, in the sudden extra heartbeats that left her feeling a bit dizzy as she forced herself to meet his gaze. “I see. And you didn't think I should kn-kn-know this be-be-before now?”

“I’ve been debating with myself whether or not to even tell you and—” he held up a hand as she folded her arms, narrowed her eyes, and opened her mouth—“before you yell at me, know, it isn’t because I was using you again, because that isn’t why. I’ve been going round since he told me.”

“Going round?”

“Trying to decide how to I make the announcement that I will abdicate in favor of Fíli.”

This time, the blow to her gut was even more powerful and she wasn’t at all certain she’d heard him correctly. In fact, she was positive she hadn’t heard him correctly, for no sane man would give up a crown for her. Her knees threatened to betray her, but fortunately, they remained strong, for she’d have probably fallen to the floor otherwise. She stared at him, her jaw going slack, her pulse roaring through her temples as she whispered, “Wait, what?”

“There is no way around the law. My great-grandfather made certain of that. Stepping aside is the only way for this wedding to happen and I am willing to do that.”

“You would g-g-g-give all of this up… all that you’ve w-w-worked for and spilled your blood for and almost gave up your life for, for me?”

“I love you.” He shrugged. “It was a far easier decision than I’d ever thought it would be.”

“Thorin, you cannot be s-s-serious about doing that.”

“Why? It isn’t as if I’ve been in this role my entire life. It’s been but a few months. I was happy in Ered Luin, and we could go there or we could travel elsewhere and decide where we would be happy to live. We can join Master Baggins in the Shire, if you’d like. I care not where we are, Jasna. And I care not about a throne. Or a title or a crown. I have what I want here, with you. I need no more than that. I want no more than that.”

She shook her head slowly. “I would never ask you to do that. I could never ask you to do that.”

“You didn't ask me to do anything. I’ve made this decision myself.”

Her eyes stung as he reached for her, his hands came to rest on her hips, the heat from those large palms sinking into her. Without thinking, she let her hands settle on his broad shoulders, the muscle thick and firm beneath his rough-hewn henley (how was it he was still fully dressed? That didn't seem right at all.) “You cannot do this.”

“Of course I can. I still have that much control over my life.” He rose to stand before her, all broad shoulders and barrel-chest.

Her dwarf.

“But what about your responsibilities to Erebor and its people?”

“They will be fine in Fíli’s hands. He’s matured and has a fine head on his shoulders and thanks to his talented healer, he will soon walk on his own as well.” He curved his hands against her cheeks, tilting her face to his. His eyes were soft, his voice low and growly.  “I do not make this decision lightly, Jasna. I know full well what it means and what will come of it and I am at peace with it. I am happy. For the first time in a lifetime, I’m happy. I’ve lost enough and I will not lose you, too. I will not choose a cold stone throne over you. I’ll not choose anything over you. I love you and I wish to be with you.”

She blinked, fighting to hold her tears at bay. “But what if you come to regret that decision? Or to resent me because I’m the r-r-reason you must make it?”

He shook his head. “I won’t. To either one. Trust me, mesmel.”

“Are you absolutely certain?”

“I am absolutely certain.” He smiled, looking as if a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. “If you will have a blacksmith instead of a king as your husband, that is.”

“Do you think I would say anything other than y-y-yes? Blacksmith. King. It matters not to me, Thorin. But, only if you are absolutely certain this is what you want.”

He bent to her, capturing her soft lips in a tender, lingering kiss. Then, pulling back just enough to break the kiss, he pressed his forehead to hers and murmured, “I’ve never been more certain of anything before, amrâlimê.”

“Thorin, do you know what you’re giving up?”

“I do, yes. And I also know what I’m getting in return. I will take you over a treasure hoard any day, mesmel.”

“You are mad, you know.”

He grinned. “It wouldn’t be the first time.”

“Thorin.” 

“It would’t be. Ask anyone.”

She gave him a long look. “I am very s-s-serious, you know. You cannot undo this once y-y-y-you’ve done it.”

His smile faded, a look of weariness coming to his eyes as he nodded. “I know, Jasna. Trust me, I do. And I’ve given this more thought than I’ve given just about anything else in my life. I know what I’m doing.”

“So, wh-where do we go from here?”

“I need to speak with Fíli and with Balin and let them know. And then,” a slight smile lifted his lips, “I don’t know, mesmel. We begin a new life elsewhere? Where would you like to go?”

“I—I don’t know,” she said softly, sweeping a long black curl away from his temple. “I’ve never been beyond the Long Lake or here before. I don’t know what else is out there.”

“There’s an entire world, mesmel.” Without warning, he swept her up in his arms. “You need only point on a map and we can go there.”

She swung her feet as he spirited her to his room, to his bed. “Anywhere?”

“Anywhere.” He set her down then moved to ease himself over her, smiling as he settled comfortably between her thighs. “We set up house, and maybe start to work on a family, anything we want.”

“I rather l-l-like how that sounds, dwarf,” she murmured as he came flush against her.

“Somehow,” he whispered back, his lips brushing hers, “I thought you might.”

[iamthecomet]

Hoot once again!

I‘m really glad to hear this. Our little ritual means a lot to me <3

I am so sorry for her, but very glad that she figured it out now. Growing up undiagnosed can be (and is most of the time) very traumatic

While I’m a bit younger, I still spent my entire childhood and half of my youth (I’m gonna pretend it has been only half of it so far cause whatever the fuck I had/have is most definitely not a joyful youth). So while I can‘t fully relate, I still kind of get it and can at least imagine how it must me for her

It‘s pretty hard to get an autism diagnosis, because it cannot be done by a regular psychiatrist (unlike ADHD for example, which is why I at least have that diagnosis already). In my area there is only one place where you can get a diagnosis and the waiting list is LONG (not the worst I‘ve seen so far but at least half a year, which is terrible if you need to get help as quickly as possible but you need a diagnosis to get any kind of help). But I’m working on it

Thank youuuu

I planned chapter 2 out yesterday

It ended up to be “only” 5 pages, but it has 39 panels (chapter 1 has 24 panels)

So I think I’ll still get more of the story across even though it seems to be one page shorter

I will most likely start working on it in November

Your day sounds pretty nice!

Today, I was really stressed and worried about something and I did it okay-ish, but I can‘t change shit anymore now anyways so I’ll have to stop worrying and just wait and see

I also had a doctors appointment to get blood drawn and tested (cause due to the meds I take I’m apparently at a higher risk of malnutrition/lack of some stuff) and it was literally the most pleasant doctors appointment I’ve ever had.

I was a too early (as always) and had to wait outside a bit because they were still on lunch break but I was let inside a few minutes earlier anyways and so I was alone in the waiting area. And the nurse was incredibly kind and nice (she had me lay down for it because she didn’t want to risk that I could pass out and then she let me take my time to get back up again). It was overall incredibly nice and I was done not even 15 minutes after my appointment (so none of that annoying waiting time that usually comes with doctors appointments)

I also wanted to mention this in the past days already but I somehow didn‘t haha:

So I saw Someone do OC-tober and I absolutely LOVED the idea! (I’m one of these people that just never really draws their OCs lmao)

So I put together a prompt list for myself and I’m really excited about it ^^

(I‘m also planning on participating in Ghosttober with my writing which is why I’m probably going to be a little stressed all throughout October which is why I’ll most likely start working on chapter 2 in November)

I once again truly hope that you had a pleasant day! ♥️

~ @owlishanon

I like our little ritual too! ♥ When my friend got her diagnosis she couldn't get it from a regular psychiatrist either. She also got her ADHD diagnosis a couple years earlier because that was much easier. Autism she had to take a handful of tests over a period of time to actually get the diagnosis. But she was 98% sure what it would be before she got it. So I guess it's a pain in the ass no matter where you try to get it. Hoping that you are able to get through that process soon and get the help that you need. I'm glad your doctor's appointment went well and was easy. That's such a rare thing. And that you had a nurse who was really accommodating and understood what you needed. I was wondering why you said you would work on chapter two in November, until I got to the end of your ask. There are A LOT of things going on in October. And it will be kind of nice to take a pause on working so hard on that and doing some other stuff. I'm really excited for kinktober/ghostober whatever we're calling it. I'm trying to get the first week written and ready this week so that it's less likely that I fall behind. We'll see how that goes. Day one is written and ready to go--so that's something at least. And OC-tober sounds SO cool. I'm excited to see what you end up doing with that. I'm sure that will be a lot of fun too!

[prof-crushing]

8/21/23

*BUSTS THROUGH THE TCC DOOR*

HEY R TEXTED ME TONIGHT!!!

Holy shit!

He finally came across that gift bag I gave him during that last month of the semester. I had messaged him on instagram after the semester ended to see if he got it and he said he’s take a look and I never heard back and I didn’t want to keep bothering him about it and I tried to just forget about it and focus on work and other stuff.

And now out of the blue, a few days before the semester starts, R texts me thanking me for the gift! And we chatted for a little bit. I was scared to keep asking him and tried to read if it seemed like I’m getting to be too much or anything and it’s kinda late (for him more so). It was mostly me saying no worries and glad he got it and asking how the move was and asking about his new commute now that he’s pretty far away. I wanted to ask him a lot more but also noticed that he wasn’t really asking me anything either (which I was kind of bummed about) so I didn’t want to drag the conversation on more that it needed to be too much.

It’s still crazy to know he’s no longer in my same city.

Sorry I haven’t been posting much or anything lately. I was tempted to post about this nearly half an hour call I had with one of my supervisors (C) that I’m close to while he was home sick for the week. He had asked me to locate some merchandise that we were having some issues with that I needed to take pictures of and send to him. It would’ve been a bit easier to to end the call and send him the pictures after he helped me locate their weirdly placed barcodes but whatever 😅 he’s always a nice break to talk to when I was getting frustrated with one of my newer coworkers. I don’t remember what we talked about exactly but it was more than just what he wanted me to look for and checking in on each other. I was getting concerned with his coughing asked if he wanted to end the call and I can keep taking pictures and send them to him or put a pause on this search since he also said it’s not super pressing and he said no reassured me that he wanted to keep going. So yeah that was nice and helped me that day.

[whythewords]

Days 227 - 266: Oh, to be in your care

These are getting fewer and further between huh? There's also no point mentioning that every single time, huh?

Well, I started school again.

It sucks.

I had a sinking feeling that this final semester was all of a sudden going to be unlike the other three and crawl by slowly...but looking at the last three weeks from a distance, I'm pretty amazed that there were three of them. It doesn't seem like it'll be too difficult but also doesn't seem like it'll be a cakewalk. I think I mentioned it before but at this point I'm just antsy because I'm over it, I'm ready to work now. I've done the co-op thing...twice...essentially doing the same thing I would do if I was hired to work there as a regular employee. Speaking of which, co-op ended and prospects at the city seem good based on what was said to me and about me. I'm still not sure if that's where I wanna end up but it also may be one of the best spots I can be while I figure out what's next. So that's pretty cool.

So yeah, I finished that, started school, caught COVID....

Yeah.

Fucking shit caught up to me.

I had been on a college campus for a couple of weeks, trying to mask up and be safe obviously but that'll only get you so far. Unclear if I was patient zero in my household as my dad got it a day or two before I did but I could have brought it back and not shown any symptoms. So the whole Chammas clan here in the apartment got infected. Luckily, mom and dad are both double-vaxxed, double-boosted and the worst of it seemed to only last about two or three days for them. Mine has been lingering though. I missed all my classes this week but luckily all of the material (aside from the live lecture) is still online, I have at least one class that was already fully virtual and a friend from older classes and my last co-op who was kind enough to talk me through today's coding lecture over WhatsApp as it was happening. I daresay I was more productive this week while sick at home than I was the last two while I was on campus. It's almost as if there's no actual reason for any of us to be there except for the fact the college wants us buy their shitty food and pay exorbitant parking fees on top of the already ridiculous tuition costs. Capitalism gon' capital. But let's move on from that since I've ranted and raved about it to family and friends over a voice chat between coughs enough this week.

Well, come to think of it, there's not much else. Oh...I guess I filed for divorce since the last post. Yeah. Fuck. That happened. We met at the courthouse. Filled out some paper work. Got some stuff notarized. Went back to her house...shit, okay. Pause. It IS her house. Why did I debate whether to refer to it as my OLD house? I guess technically both are true. *sigh* See how psychologically fun this whole process is? Anyway, yeah we went back to her house and re-signed and dated any of the paper work we had looked over a few weeks before and then I took it all home and filed. The process supposedly takes about 6-8 weeks (it's been 5) and that's assuming that we did everything correctly. At this point, I'm just praying I don't get an email back from the superior court saying "sorry try again" or I will lose my god damn shit. The process shouldn't be this hard....it's already hard enough emotionally.

Okay...fuck it here it is.

So she was late to the courthouse. We had to queue up and take another number after I had already been there for close to an hour. I was furious. I did my best to remain calm. She was apologetic. But god it was just...a microcosm of the worst parts of our relationship. I spent the whole rest of the time thinking how glad I was going to be when this process was all over, how this time might ACTUALLY be the last time I had to deal with this shit...and I just....couldn't fucking hold onto it. Maybe my heart knew it wasn't worth it. Maybe I'm past the point of caring, of investing too much of myself in it, and that's probably the healthier thing.

Before I left, I stood at the doorway awkwardly, said goodbye and then gave her a hug, and instinctively gave her a kiss on head. We just froze there for a second in a fucking depressing tableau.

I've said time and time again that this was all meant to happen, and I still believe that. I've said we're both gonna move on from this and do so much better for ourselves and by ourselves, and fuck I believe that with all my heart. But as has happened numerous times this year, and will certainly happen a few more before the year is through, loneliness has tendency to kick you right in rose-coloured nostalgia. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about giving her a shout when I got COVID just to hear her sympathize and remember what it was like when someone other than mommy and daddy were taking care of me.

It's funny, I started this series of sort of journal entries at the beginning of the year, to document my progress, the first new year since leaving my marriage and my home. And moreso than "look at all the progress I've made," I Iook back on everything so far and say "look how it's still hard, but I'm still moving forward." "Look how it's still hard but I'm still here."

I don't remember where I heard it recently but "two steps forward, one step back is STILL one step forward." So that's it. This is gonna be the pattern. Slow progress forward, but mostly more of the same. More of the same until it's different.

[malevolententity]

WELCOME TO THE ANTI PROJECT UPDATE

decided on giving myself a little treat these past few days and watched episode 9 while frogging this blanket i was fortunate enough to be gifted like fourth hand! i have some ideas on what i may do with this yarn but nothing is set in stone. the colors are lovely but hated the blanket so. harvest. its was for harvesting.

also i hate frogging other peoples work. i hate how other people weave in their ends it is bad and awful and means i have to cut their work atleast twice per color to reball it and join it. the first few colors i did i had to cut like 5 times? and by the time i got to the final 3 i figured out how to only cut it twice and the last color i only had to cut once. but my god. hated unraveling and m so glad i gave myself the treat of episode 9 while doing this because it did take like 4 hours. especially with how much pausing i had to do to look at Just the work trying to frog it backwards at some points i just. i only got to watch 3 hours of aop since thats all i had left of the episode. HOWEVER! the timing worked out that when i was at the end of the last color it was the end of the episode as most of my pausing was in the very beginning.

be hold. a very angry photo at the blanket when i stopped the other day from frogging to give myself a rest. other crocheters should not be allowed to knot all their ends into normal stitches making it seemingly impossible to unravel their work. it is not a crime to have ur work be recycled by someone else >:I

SEASON THOUGHTS SO FAR

dudes what a fucking episode. i love getting to see more of the town and trying to figure out what the fuck is up. i am with the cast atm that the crystals healing you IS probably like the goo in the haunteds place that "heals" you but actually drains sanity. i am genuinely curious to see what happens to thaigo once they leave the town if his hearing goes away or if he stays repaired. m genuinely so curious to see how thats handled. i also. can not fucking believe. they were all told that fire bad. and thaigo then went 'cool so heres fire' bestie. what did you think was gonna happen? what the fuck was going thru ur brain.

ALSO HELLO DID THE MIST AND THE MAZE KILL THE HELPER??? HOW THE FUCK??? WAS HE WITH THEM AT THE FARM DURING COMBAT. WALK TO THE BLACKSMITHS. AND THEN WHEN THE DOOR OPENED HE WAS FOUND DEAD INSIDE. I WANNA KNOW WHAT THE MAZE WHISPER WAS SOOOO BAD WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO THE HELPER AND FELPS. WHAT DID HE DO TO MY LIL GUY HE WAS SO CUTE. justice for the helper. i got him for an episode and i want him back. if he doesnt come back ill be so sad even tho i knoooow he was clearly an npc that cell went "hey felps youd have fun as this limited time guy. come be a little guy for 3 hours" but like. i want justice for him he was so cute. bring him back to me.

NEXT PROJECT

i think i have my next project picked this blanket actually had all the yarn i needed sans 1 color! but m planning on this being a mock of the pattern to see if i can actually make it before going and buying the actual colors and weight that i want to do it in. so i might start that project sometime this week! m v v excited to see how much of the mock i can get done with this recycled yarn since i have No Idea how much of it i have. as i am. too lazy to figure out aprox how much yarn i have with math. i could figure out the grams/ounces and do worsted oz into yards but. no<3 self care<3 fuck it we ball<3 i have as much as i have and hope its enough<3 and if not oh well<3 its a mock so it Can get weird with the color switching if i need too<3

it also just. simply would not matter if i figured it out because my pattern doesnt tell me ANYTHING about how much yarn is needed for any colors it literally just says "lot of X colors and small amount of X colors" which is infuriating but. i guess thats just 2009 amigurumi blogspot patterns for ya

[lifewithoutmeds]

April 14, 2023

Oooh, another long spell without writing, curiously, and things haven’t been that good and i haven’t really been trucking along.

Not much has transpired in the last month. work, social outings, the usual to-do chore list. i was doing pretty well budget wise then went a lil manic and bought a new LL Bean jacket, new adidas NMD shoes, and a fly fishing rod/reel combo (new, but off of OfferUp.) Those three cost $350. I also bought a hair dryer, but I probably needed it, not having ever purchased one and having used a small portable travel one for the last several years.

Kinda feels nice actually having a few new shiny things in my life.

Buying and the contemplating of buying the jacket made me have to face my weight again and my body image. I could have gotten a regular small, or a petite small or a petite medium, and i realized that with my circumference, i’d probably have to go with the medium, and with some embarrassment/chagrin, i did so, and glad i did, because it fits almost snugly. realized again how much my body image/weight is negatively impacting me and making me feel like i can’t participate in fashion or what i consider to be good taste even in clothing.

so once again i’m re-dedicating myself to weight loss, to the discipline required in taking small steps in the right direction. Had a great session with kelda yesterday and she was saying how much i vacillate between extremes. i will binge eat then go to extremely restrictive eating, then binge some more. i don’t just eat pasta once; once i eat, i finish the box, i eat the entire pound, maybe not in one sitting, but i figure, i’ve already slipped, why not just go all the way. and she was encouraging me always find the middle, because i have such difficulty doing that.

yesterday was practice, as i watched what i ate, tracked my calories, and made sure i had good amounts of protein and some fruits/vegetables, but when i saw i still could eat some calories, instead of just starving myself, i treated myself to a haagendazs bar that still put me in a caloric deficit. but it didn’t make me feel like i was starving or limiting myself unduly.

kelda was saying that even if i didn’t feel like getting up or moving, if i just made myself move for five minutes, that would be better than just vegging. i think it’s called the two minute rule. just to commit to two minutes of any task that seems troublesome, and typically, upon having started, it’s easier to keep going and keep at it longer.

today feels better. yesterday, i had done all of the things, so maybe that contributed. i worked hard (at work), ran the vacuum twice, washed the dishes three times, walked for 40 minutes, exercised for 20 minutes, read some of my book, and filmed a bit for my fishing youtube. i ate a small salad, i ate well-portioned and relatively healthy meals throughout the day, had my one hour of facetime therapy with kelda. i brushed my teeth and even washed my face and put on overnight face lotion before i went to bed, a task which has been strangely difficult for me even though i hate myself for not doing it afterward.

this weekend’s plans: Today/Friday: a few chores, getting gas, in n out for lunch, then fishing from about noon - 7 p.m.

saturday: brunch with amy lee, exchange a few items with lana around noon, hot flash lesbian event in the evening

sunday: not much so far. a walk? some cleaning? probably preparing a bit for the trip to belfast/dublin later in the week.

i think it’s important to: keep moving, as kelda said. to have things on the calendar. to stop getting deeper when i already feel bad about myself. to have regularly scheduled social things, travel things, and have adequate rest in between times. it’s important to stop and process, and journal/write this stuff out. it’s important to pause and clean and purge as necessary.

it just occurred to me how much i enjoy matt and kendy’s company. i should probably schedule something with them soon. i love good conversation that flows, i love the banter, i love the cleverness, the wit, the undercurrent of care and kindness.

today feels better than others. probably some combination of a week that has felt accomplished, with some good coffee this morning, and anticipation of a few good things to come (fishing, amy, lesbians.)

also i’ve committed to living a lifestyle that allows me to lose 1.5 lbs a week. that means: calorie tracking/restriction, 80-100 grams of protein a day, 15,000 steps a day (which usually necessitates at least one longish walk), and 20 minutes of weight training daily. it’s nice to think that if i keep this up, in x days i’ll be y pounds thinner, and ooh by x month, i’ll be z pounds thinner! the trouble is the days, is the hours, is the minutes, is the boredom, is the emotions, is the tiny acts of slipping up or giving up. but i have to use that as exercises in discipline, which i admire, and feel i lack. i must be what i admire.

[taz-skylar]

hi roh!

hope this week has been kind to you 😌 (despite all your finals) as a working adult (?) fumbling through the world, sometimes (most times) I really miss my school days hah

asdfghj I confess to not watching op *sweats* I briefly considered bingeing it to make your gift but when I googled the episode count, this was me: *insert homer simpson backing into bush meme*

I'm enjoying both of them! sxf was kinda slow the first few episodes, but I really enjoyed the tennis tournament ones. blue lock is absolutely amazing so far! I went into it knowing only that it was about football/ soccer so the first episode had me going ?????? omg is it that dramatic? 🤣 the additional time really had me laughing though, especially the recent one with kunigami crying 💀 tbh I don't remember much of link click but I remember it keeping me on the edge of my seat, and whenever the first few notes of the ending song started playing I would go "ah yes here comes the cliffhanger ending"

your answers were so fun to read, especially the characters you relate to! if anyone ever asked me that question I would probably struggle to answer, but you have so many and that's so cool! you and moh sound like a chaos duo asdfgh but it's such a nice dynamic! my brother and I aren't that distant but we don't share similar interests and don't spend much time together, so we don't have a lot of things in common to talk about. increasingly the only time we interact is when we go on family trips which are becoming shorter and rare as the years go by 😔 you and moh sound close and I'm really envious about that!

and here's this week's questions: do you have any plans for the end of the year? do you have anything new you're looking forward to or want to try next year? could be an activity, a hobby, a place to go to, ...

- your animanga secret santa 🦖

finally finished all my exams so i’m just exhausted and finally got back home on monday night so i’m just catching up with my family and friends and on tv shows/movies that i missed while school was going on.

flkadfja i’m honoured that you even considered bingeing op for me 🤣 that’s hilarious and amazing !!! yeah, op is definitely the longest animanga series out there but i will say that it’s definitely worth the read/watch! and if you ever do, lmk and we can scream about it together bc i definitely feel like you’d enjoy it :D

yes, sxf was pretty slow in the beginning but i’m glad it’s picking up now ! the tennis tournament was absolutely wild and my sister and i had to keep pausing and rewatching certain scenes bc we couldn’t stop laughing (like when loid started dodging the bullets by swinging all over the place fjaldkfa). my favourite thing about blue lock is that, while all other sports animanga are like ‘there’s no i in team’ and everything, blue lock’s like fuck friendships, i’m winning this shit flkfjad the additional time bits are such a cute little add on, i love them all!! since i got super busy with school, i wasn’t able to get back into link clink but now that i’m home, i’m hoping i finally can (especially since i stopped on a two parter)!

faldfj i wanna know who you find yourself relating to now that you posed that challenge 🧐 that question was super fun, and initially i definitely struggled and had to go through my anime list bc i suddenly forgot every single character that i’ve ever seen fjaldkfja (also why i asked moh what she thinks which was a mistake, clearly)

yeah, moh and i are very chaotic. i think everyone who knows us can attest to that, our parents like to say that when we fight, we’re like cats so that’s fun 🤣 aww i honestly can’t imagine not being close to my twin sister or my brother. is there anything that you and your brother do enjoy doing together?? do you guys live close to one another? maybe starting with something small can bring you closer than you are?

answer for this week’s question: my plans for the end of the year consist of me being home with my family and friends for a bunch of parties since i haven’t seen them all for 4 months and eating all the homemade food my mom and dad can make bc i missed it so much 💙 i really want to explore the city i’m living in next year so hopefully school will calm down a bit and let me do that bc i’m only there for one year and i don’t want to just be sitting doing nothing but studying 😭

thanks for the ask!! love hearing from you, bud! 💙