#gnawing on my arm. YOU DONT GET HER.

[old-knightsvow]

this applies to tom meta too. you don't have to change anything in the meme it's just implied. nit even particularly tom gender meta i just think tom in general

[rambunctioustoons]

cartoony beep censor sounds. 💥

comfort character meme that's been going around !

[mariahcarreyyy]

congrats on 2k!!! you deserve it and so so much more <3

can i request being overprotective of them in front of prospective partners with max ofc thank u very much -cait/@leclerced

# prompt no.10, being overprotective of them in front of prospective partners

mariahcarreyyy's 2k celebration announcement post

It was embarrassing.

Watching two grown men argue over who would drive you home from the lively, neon-lit bar led to a bashful flush, warming your body amidst the crisp darkness of the night.

Only minutes prior, Max had taken one look at you and decided home was where you should be. You didn't make any protests because he's right; you wonder if you looked like a book to Max—pages crinkled, broken spines, and easily read words in his favorite font.

"I can take my fucking girlfriend home, Max," your boyfriend, Scotty, seethes through gritted teeth, an ugly vein bursting on his forehead.

Scotty evidently did not like the idea of Max driving you home for a reason you had no idea of. You and Max had been friends for years, so if even an ounce of your yearning and want was reciprocated, he would've done something by now.

That thought did little to dwindle the stubborn 'what if's from gnawing at your soul, the twinge in your heart whenever you see Max with anyone but yourself.

And also the slight guilt at thinking of another man when you have a perfectly fine one waiting at home for you each night but. Whatever.

"I swear to fucking God if you get into that car with her--"

Eyes widening, you place a calming hand on Max's shoulder and ignore the daggers your boyfriend is glaring at your touch. "Okay, how 'bout we all relax, yeah?"

Max cranes his neck to look at you, his harsh facade melting when he catches sight of the worry etched on your face. Once his heaving turned into steady breathing, your face ducking shyly to look away from his gaze, your boyfriend cleared his throat loudly.

You hastily drop your hand like the Dutch had burned you, and Max lets out a disapproving noise at the loss of your contact. Yeah, Scotty did not look impressed. The murderous glint in his eyes did nothing to quell the uncomfortable atmosphere, his jaw flexing like he's capable of murder, of tearing Max's limbs off and letting the blood spill on the pavement.

"Scotty...to be fair, you did drink, and I don't really feel like dying tonight."

A hand creeps around Max's waist, your fingertips pinching the flesh after you hear him snort. A barely concealed yelp from the driver has Scotty scrunching his nose up in distaste, nostrils flared, and betrayal painted across his face.

You should probably side with your boyfriend, but. But the cool breeze makes the tiny hairs on your arms stand up, teeth chattering; you wrap the thin, barely-there jacket Max gave you at the beginning of the night and roll your eyes, walking to Max's car.

Fondly, Max observes the impatient tapping of your foot and flush on your face—from the cold, he tells himself, not for the same reasons as himself. He raises his brows tauntingly at Scotty before advancing towards your shaky frame.

"Fuckin' bitch," Scotty mutters into the air, lips pursed into a scowl and vodka overriding his senses.

Your ears don't quite grasp the words, but Max's do. So, when the world champion's fist paves the way for the colorful hues of a bruise to bloom on the bridge of your boyfriend's nose, you can't help but choke on a gasp.

authors note. anddddd scotty makes a comeback!!!! tbf in the og fic he was actually portrayed as a good bf. max & reader r js bad ppl. now i dont have to feel bd tho cus he's terrible in this🥰

[nhularin]

ENOUGH FOR YOU

PAIRING popular bf! sunghoon x f!reader GENRE angst no comfort, childhood friends to lovers to exes, highschool AU WARNING wonyoung hating sunghoon XTRA not as angsty as my other drabbles but..., not proofread, probably some grammar mistakes WC 1.3k series masterlist

june 2nd, 2002

"stop moping around and eat your sandwich"

wonyoung snickered, mac and cheese muffling her voice as your head laid restlessly on the metal ( probably dirty and oily) cafeteria table.

"like seriously, its been five days since he last messaged you. i always knew he was a jerk, pretty privilege is real! hes nothing but a ken doll with the way his words are filled with nonsense"

"leave him alone" you groaned, head still down, you could practically feel the acne screaming from underneath your skin "hes a nice guy, probably just busy"

"busy my ass, dont you see the way he literally follows that loser group like an overgrown chihuahua? if he can make time to buy booze for a bunch of 17 year olds then he can for sure make time for his amazing, smart and pretty girlfriend" wonyoung rolled her eyes as she stuffed bland coleslaw in her mouth

you looked up, dark bags adoring your face, you had been in a relationship with sunghoon since your freshman year. as children, you both had been inseparable ever since you moved to salt lake city, your bond growing stronger with each passing year. but now, as juniors, things felt different. he had recently joined the popular crowd, the same crowd you both used to talk shit about in between classes, and friday nights had become synonymous with parties and new faces.

tried so hard to be everything that you liked

the change had been gradual at first, but you couldn't help but notice how sunghoon had become the center of attention, attracting the gazes of both girls and sweaty boys alike. his charismatic smile and magnetic personality drew people towards him like moths to a flame, leaving you feeling like a mere extra and shadow in his presence.

but it was the encounters with the prettier, more popular girls that cut you to the core. you couldn't help but compare yourself to them, questioning if you were really deserving for sunghoon. the doubts grew louder with each unanswered message, as sunghoon seemed to drift further away.

you only sighed

"lets get this over with. you, pretty girl, find your ogre looking piece of shit of a boyfriend and im gonna stay at the entrance" wonyoung ordered sternly, her voice growing darker as she described your boyfriend

unable to bear the weight of uncertainty any longer and seeing you drown in the growing pool of self pity, wonyoung suggested going to the party where sunghoon tweeted where he was going to be at. maybe seeing him in person would provide some clarity. and so, you found yourself at the heart of the celebration, searching for a glimpse of the person who held your heart.

the night was filled with laughter and music as you stood in the midst of the crowded party. but amidst the lively atmosphere, a heavy sense of unease settled in your heart. you couldn't help but feel like a walking shell of sadness with the absence and lack of your boyfriend's warmth, your messages left unanswered for days dont make your overthinking self feel better either. the persistent doubt gnawed like an aggressive parasite in your mind, making you question if you were truly enough for him.

you found someone more exciting the next second, you were gone

it didn't take long for your eyes to land on him. sunghoon stood near the punch bowl, a radiant smile on his face as he engaged in a conversation with the head cheerleader joonhee. your heart sank at the sight, your fears of being replaceable seemingly coming true, his laughter and the way he touched her arm with familiarity stung deeply in your soul.

"1,2,3 breathe, 1,2,3 breathe" you whispered shakingly to yourself with closed eyes, trying to calm the storm inside of you

overwhelmed by heartache, you couldn't stand to witness any more. and so, running through the backdoor and through drunk teenagers, your breath came in ragged gasps as tears welled up slowly, refusing to fall, just like your pride. you couldn't bear to be in that suffocating environment any longer. the cool night air embraced you as you reached your car, parked in lee heeseungs empty suburb's parking lot.

as you sat in the car, your emotions overflowed, tears still threatened to fall freely as your soul filled with rage and betrayal. it was in that moment, surrounded by darkness and engulfed by doubt, that your vulnerability took hold. the floodgates of your emotions burst open, and a stream of tears cascaded down your cheeks. each tear held your deepest fears and insecurities, each sob a cry for validation and reassurance.

and you left me there cryin', wonderin' what I did wrong

"fucking shit" you sighed as incoming calls of wonyoung flooded your notifications. "should've listened to her, huh?" humorless laughter echoed in your crammy dark dimmed toyota. the silence was unbearable, fuelling the whispers in your head that you were not enough and you havent been good enough for him for a while. that you had lost sunghoon to someone who was prettier, much more interesting than you. but deep down, a glimmer of strength began to flicker within you

"why wasn't I enough?" you whispered, the words escaping your lips like a desperate plea. in the depths of your pathetic despair, you couldn't comprehend how you had fallen short, how you had failed to capture sunghoons attention and affection.

the car's small interior offered a temporary solace, shielding you from the actions of the world outside. the emptiness of the parking lot mirrored the emptiness you felt within, making the pain that coursed through your veins grow stronger. you gripped the steering wheel, your knuckles turning white as you tried to steady your trembling body (and if you were your friend, how you were going to run over your boyfriend)

but as the minutes ticked by, you began to actually listen to the daily "you're enough, you're enough. you deserve all the love and happiness in the world, from someone much better" mantra of your friend, realizing that your worth did not hinge on Sunghoon's approval.

you were more than just a measure of your relationship. you were a person with dreams, aspirations, and a heart that deserved to be cherished, regardless of whether it was by sunghoon or someone else.

with each tear that fell, a flicker of resilience ignited within you. screw him, you refused to let your doubts created by him define you. you refused to believe that you were not enough. slowly, you wiped away the tears, your reflection in the rearview mirror revealing tired and empty eyes

Taking a deep breath, you whispered to yourself, "I am enough, i am enough, i am enough. I am deserving of love and happiness." the words hung in the air, the words a combat fighting the doubts that had plagued your mind.

Don't you think I loved you too much to think I deserve nothing?

"and i deserve if from someone who values me" your voice cracked, dried tears threatening to fall again

as you started the car, the engine's purr resonated with newfound determination. you drove away from the empty parking lot, leaving behind the doubts and heartache that had consumed you. and as you navigated the darkened streets, a flicker of hope emerged, lighting your path towards self-discovery (having a midlife crisis at the ripe age of seventeen is normal, right?) and a love that would celebrate your true worth.

'Cause someday I'll be everything to somebody else

incoming messages!

wony (12 new messages, 3 unanswered calls)

hoonie <333 (3 new messages) OPEN

hoonie <333: i saw you at heeseungs

hoonie <333: its not what it looked like, yn

hoonie <333: you know i only love you

are you sure you want to block 'hoonie <333'?

PROCEED ✓ CANCEL

PERM TAGLIST @misokei @avocarua @sngvhs @essmarye @haechansbbg

SERIES' MASTERLIST @flwerfield @hyhees @mrchweeee @j1nniee @mikaluvsyouu @delulu4-life @mora134340 @beomsbeanie @leep0ems @cIphantom-hive @yla-aira @filmofhybe @nishik1

[luveline]

omg jade!! this just popped into my head but do u think u could write smth ab roan gettin a tinyyyy bit jealous when reader gives attention to another kid? pls feel free to ignore if u dont like it hehe j smth i thought ab! ily!!

this request is from october I'm so sorry it took this long, thank you for requesting, ily ♥︎ fem!reader

Eddie’s friend Gareth has two kids. 

Twin boys, they hang off of him one to each arm and might be the cutest kids you’ve ever seen that aren’t Roan. One is much, much cuddlier than the other, and when he climbs into your lap you really, honestly can’t say no. He’s practically a baby still, two and half years old and chatty without real words. 

When he strokes your face with your hand, you look over his little head at Eddie where he’s sitting at the same picnic table and pout at him. 

“You want one?” he asks, raising his eyebrows. 

You rub the back of the baby’s head, hand stroking over fine, sandy brown hair. “Stop it.”

It’s a very cheeky joke considering you and Eddie haven’t been together that long. And besides, you think he might have his work cut out for him with his own baby girl, he doesn’t need another right now. 

Said baby girl has taken to holding your hand basically everywhere you go. You adore Roan and if she wants to hold your hand whenever she sees you, it’s an improvement from her wanting to always be carried. She’d been holding your hand five minutes ago before she proclaimed her need to pee. 

She emerges from the house and into the garden with her little hands dripping and Eddie beckons her over. You can hear their hushed conversation as he wipes her hands dry with his t-shirt. 

“Did you flush?” he asks quietly.

“Yeah, daddy.”

“Did you wipe the right way?”

She looks a little embarrassed, and then that embarrassment gets eaten by Munson rage. “Yeah, dad.”

Eddie only laughs. “Okay, alright. Thanks, mini me. Kiss for a job well done?”

Roan gives him a quick kiss and then throws her gaze to you. You watch what looks to be excitement shrivel up and dissolve into dust, her eyes widened and then pinched with hurt. 

“What’s the matter, baby?” you ask, hand splayed over the small back of your newfound charge. 

She doesn’t talk to you. Roan turns on her heel and climbs straight into Eddie’s lap, small thighs either side of his waist and face falling into his t-shirt. He’s as confused as you are, dropping his face down closer to hers and murmuring something too quiet to hear. Her tiny black bunches bounce as she shakes her head. 

He tucks a loose curl behind her ear. “Tell me, sweetheart,” he says gently. 

Roan pushes her face deeper into his chest and sighs. 

You’re at that stage of knowing and loving Roan where all of her upsets still feel huge to you. Eddie, having experienced her change in emotion every single day of her life, is much less affected. Not any less loving, or any less caring, but he doesn’t get so stressed. He pats her little back for what’s left of his friends garden party, and you say goodbye to your clinger when it’s time for their nap. 

“Let’s go home, should we?” Eddie asks gently, forehead tapped against Roan’s. 

She grumbles irritably and Eddie picks her up, her face quickly hidden in his neck. When all the goodbyes have been exchanged you follow him back to his car, nibbling your lip intermittently. Roan isn’t prone to being quiet like this unless she’s sick or tired, and it’s hours from bedtime, so she has to be sick. 

"She's not warm," Eddie tells you. 

"Do you feel sick?" you ask her anyways, not because you don't believe Eddie's capabilities as a dad, but for your own peace of mind — you don't like worrying about Roan. It gnaws at you. 

She doesn't speak to you. In fact, she doesn't speak to you for hours. Not when you get home, not at the dinner table, and not during cartoons before bed. She doesn't hug you goodnight, and that's when Eddie gives a knowing, amused snort. 

"What?" you ask, pulling your gaze from her retreating back to him. "What's funny? Your baby doesn't like me anymore, this is the opposite of funny." 

"She's just jealous." You scoot away from him. He pulls you back in with an eye roll. "Not of me, dork. Of Henry." 

You blink. "Gareth's kid?" 

"Yes." His head lolls lazily to the side, and his smile is more a smirk than anything else. "Come on, sweet thing. Use your brain." 

You would glare at him if the cogs weren't turning in your head. "Well, what do I do?" You stand up. "I gotta say sorry." 

Eddie catches your hand. When you look at him, he shakes his head. You love and hate how smug he is as a dad, how he simultaneously knows all the answers but has to call Wayne at least once a week with some whacky question. 

"What?" 

"You don't have to say sorry to her for hugging another kid, just… explain that she's your favourite." 

"She is my favourite." 

"I know."

You look down the hall and then back to your boyfriend. "Will you come with me?" 

"Always." Eddie gets up, and you hold hands all the way to Roan's bedroom, though the slim hallway makes it difficult. 

He knocks on Roan's door. "Babe?"

"Daddy?" 

He pushes open the door. Roan isn't sleeping, she usually doesn't until Eddie comes in to tuck her into bed and kiss her goodnight. She's sitting by the bottom of the bed with her big paper sketchbook and a crayon in hand, but she hasn't drawn anything yet. She drops the crayon and looks up at you both suspiciously. 

"Y/N wants to talk to you. Do you wanna sit in the bed together?" he asks her. 

She nods. Too soon, Eddie's pulling his hand out of yours and scooping Roan up deftly, and he climbs into her tiny princess bed with little hesitation. She looks small in his lap. 

You sit gingerly opposite. 

Eddie gives you an encouraging smile, worming his thumb into the palm of her hand. 

"Roan," you start, awkward because Eddie's listening, hesitant because you don't wanna mess this up. You decide to go for the straightforward approach. "You know you're my favourite girl, yeah?" 

She glares at you. 

Not what you'd been expecting. 

You try again. "I… I love you very much. Like, so much it squeezes out of me when you hug me, and you gotta push it all back in for me." 

An inkling of a smile appears. She loves that game, and she's stronger than she looks. It really does feel like she's squeezing all the air from your lungs sometimes. 

"And-" You continue, prompted by Eddie's voracious nodding. "And even though sometimes other boys and girls want to give me a hug, none of them ever give me hugs as good as yours. I just want you to know that your hugs are my favourite." 

Roan leans back heavy into Eddie's chest. He kisses the top of her head unthinking, lips hidden by her dark brown curls. 

Then, his lips move down to her ear, and he says, in his professional parenting voice that's all soft and warm, "I know you were unhappy when Y/N gave baby Henry a cuddle, but just 'cause she gave him a hug doesn't mean she can't give you one too. And ignoring people isn't something we like to do, is it?" 

Roan frowns at him. "But she was holding my hand first." 

"I know. You gotta share her, though. Like right now, you're in my lap, and Y/N isn't complaining. Maybe she wants to be in my lap, or maybe she wants you in hers." 

You take the queue. "I miss my goodnight hug," you say, hands moving forward. You pout at her. "Please, Roan."

You wouldn't force Roan into a hug if you didn't think she wanted one. You're right, thankfully, and Roan stands up, wobbling across the mattress in her pink pyjamas and straight into your chest. 

You curl your arms around her too tight and send Eddie your most thankful, loving look as Roan snuggles your neck. 

"Missed you, princess," you murmur, hand creeping up her back to play in the soft ends of her hair. 

You hug. Roan turns to mush, boneless, limp, every word for it, putty in your hands. Eddie had told you once that he thinks she likes your hugs because you're so soft. 

He wiggles his eyebrows. "Think about it," he whispers. "You could have two of her. Three." 

You close your eyes so you don't have to look at him, flustered but so happy you end up laughing. 

"Kiss?" you ask Roan. 

She nods. You cover her in kisses, every inch of her perfect face. 

[weirdmageddon]

since hes open to feedback im considering talking to james roach about giving jade the justice she deserves after her narrative shafting in act 6 and one-dimensional ooc-ness (and also being a plot device deprived of agency) in the epilogues. if i do im probably going to link to this post……

so james if i sent this to you and you’re reading this, hi! :)

you say, “i want you to know if youre having problems with the story you can come to me with it and i will hear you out”. first of all you are such a good dude and have such a good open honest approach to the fans. i need to get that out there, because i know you’re just as much a fan of these characters and world are we are. secondly, i don’t know what your plans for homestuck beyond canon are, but dave and jade’s poor handling is a problem in both homestuck canon (act 6, even act 5 fucking them over with “tell, don’t show”; see the latter half of section 1 of the post at > Dave: Deploy cloning apparatus. and section 2) and post-canon that has yet to be addressed.

i understand the nuances of making things flow in a story; things that have already been established can’t be simply retconned. i wrote this post knowing that in mind and hopefully working around that into believably timed and justified/needed arcs gives it more potential

jade is a character i care about so much, and many fans also. her dynamic with dave was one of my favorites but the resolution to their separation…is not even really a resolution. it’s hard to talk about one without the other since theyve always been narratively intertwined. or at least jade has

remember how they musically collaborated more than the other kids? (crystalanthemums is their surprisingly tender song dont forget. i saw that the weird troll grub versions of objects make a comeback in the upd8; make music a relevant part of homestuck in-universe again too </3) dave sending her sbahj furry poster in the mail? the first ones to use a collaborative fraymotif in the comic? kringlefucker and conksuck boot? literally collaborating on creating the right seed for the new universe? and then dave died in jade’s arms and they were separated for 3 years and then that never gets touched on because of the retcon and all the other endgame shit going on (and lets be real grimbark jade from before the retcon wasn’t a satisfying reunion either). we get like, a brief exchange of dialogue at the very very end that made you want to see MORE of them after the battle but it. doesnt happen.

and then in the epilogues jade gets warped into this oddly hypersexual ooc one-dimensional character meant to narratively get in the way of davekat and it’s so awkward and uncomfortable for them. and even THEN in meat timeline gets her agency revoked by the narrative with alt calliope. and in candy dave realizes he’s gay (i thought he was explicitly bi? didnt he call jane hot multiple times both pre-and post-retcon, and once call roxy a “choice babe” in pajamas before he knew it was his ectomom?? if you’re actually gay and in denial why would you have these subconscious freudian blunders). and being married to jade gnaws at him because of it which is. unsatisfying i guess and isn’t consistent with dave’s established sexuality…and then he dies leaving his probably concerned wife and becomes a robot. even if the “point” is that the epilogues are metanarrative commentary about storytelling and candy represents the kind of fanfic that goes off the rails with fanservice it doesn’t feel good when i still care about these characters and their established canons. and a lot of people are in the same camp as me regarding this. it’s still an uncomfortable resolution for their relationship

i really want to see jade’s arc overcoming being used as a puppet by the narrative and the space aspect. just some things to think about / consider that have been running through my head: she’s a witch, right? isn’t what she’s supposed to do is actively bend the rules of her aspect? feferi bended the rules of life by asking the horrorterrors to create dream bubbles so the deceased could still sort of “live” which had a massive narrative impact. who exactly determines that being spacebound means you are fated to be passive and alone? the author? alt calliope? how do we know alt calliope can be trusted or if she’s just projecting her experiences as the most passive class possible onto jade, who ironically has an active manipulation class but is forced to be passive for some reason? normal calliope wasn’t right about everything classpect-related either.

ultimately these things are up to you. you’re still the director of course. but i’m speaking to you, as equally caring of these characters as you and everyone on the team, as a hypothetical suggestion or just something to consider for a jade arc: i think it would do such good to jade and the comic as a whole to see her speak to the manager and recognize the power she has and take back the reigns over her own life and dignity. jade is MAD that she had her own possibilities for socialization and agency taken away from her. and with floralmarsupial, my beloved mutual floral who i went to homestuck high together with, i KNOW the potential they possess to write a compelling arc for jade harley. i think everyone knows too lol floral is THE compelling deep jade harley fanwork big name fan. i dont know what we got to lose. with you guys in charge now, and with the last we see of jade in hs^2 (now hs:bc) fighting callie’s influence and advocating for her own agency, really the only way to go from here for jade is up. (assuming she doesn’t permadie of peanut but i doubt that’s going to happen since she’s one of the original kids and it wouldn’t be satisfying storytelling. and it’s homestuck)

this statement so ripe with potential to me ^ and we’re left on a cliffhanger with jade going in this direction

i want jade and dave to be close friends who care about each other a lot and do silly stuff together again. this isn’t even a call to make davejade canon; it doesnt have to be romantic—i dont want a davekat davejade war to break out, you know? i know you’re trying to balance fan demands. but i just loved their dynamic a lot and i MISS it so much, homestuck act 6 didnt give us this and i wish their reunion had more that went into it. we’re past that point though

i want jade and dave to have a talk that’s like old times. something that isn’t awkward as hell or about sexual relations or drama or whos fucking who. just something for the two of them. something that grounds them in what made homestuck so compelling in the first place: character and friendships and these kind of interactions

i want to see them collaborate again. an idea i have is maybe they start a band or something since they’re both musically talented and also live together so they can make stuff together in person now. you’re a music guy you get it. tangle buddies. jam buddies

and maybe something more serious that concerns just the two of them. post-retcon dave never talked to jade about his thoughts when they fought bec noir right? knowing that jade would inevitably kill him with bullets through bec, but he couldnt warn her because he knows she wouldn’t go through with it, creating a doomed timeline? so jade thought all that time she killed him by accident…..what about all that guilt she must harbor? the first person she had in-person contact with since she was probably four years old, her best friend online, and accidentally killed him within just a few hours of meeting him? and never got to talk about it with him, let alone anyone, after three years? hello?? :(

these are the final lines of the last pesterlog between jade and dave before their 3-year separation (and basically all of act 6)

so uh…..this exchange really openly invites some kind of talk to take place even if it’s long overdue. among other things maybe. they need to hug or something. jade’s touch starvation is real, but not everything needs to be sexualized about touch. she’s lonely and starved of affection but i feel like it would be more meaningful if it wasn’t sexualized. just really basic platonic primal cloth mother needs. just like..both being human beings and having basic needs like this that jade’s been deprived of. who’s the person she would feel most comfortable going to? who does she have the richest history with throughout the webcomic? dave, right? her online best friend since childhood that always cared a lot about her? they have stuff to talk about

i feel like that would address the issue people had with jade’s out of left-field promiscuity in the epilogues and even leftovers of it in hs^2. not only do i think primal platonic touch starvation would be a more meaningful and evocative type of interaction to give them at some point, it wouldn’t rock the boat or create any ship drama (davekat has long since sailed and most people seem to be on board with it) and it would probably be really positive representation of these sorts of things which not only throws a bone to aroace people but just depicting this sort of thing normalizes the fact that two people can be close and not necessarily in an official relationship.

this is a good transition point to this post also which is basically an extension to this one. it’s exactly the issues i had. it’s on the nature of what they had going and how much they mean to each other but how the storytelling held them back when it was unnecessary

this breaks my heart. mr. roach and hs:bc writing team please i miss my favorite blorbo duo being happy in each other’s company. they were such good friends but circumstances pulled them apart. i miss when they created music together and talked about their interests and exchanged quips. i am such a well of ideas for stuff like this. show us how much they mean to each other again

if youre still reading this james thanks for hearing me out. if you wanna pass on to the writing team to look at and get their feedback on this i’d be so so thankful

“and to think that after all this he still chose to save her, like always, probably knowing he had little to no chance, just because he cares for her, her life and who she is beyond this moment, really meant a lot for them. i really, really was mad that this would be the last time they would truly ever be together in a way that to me mattered” — vintagegamebro

[ganondoodle]

I was at first in love with totk, and I still think mechanical wise, its quite impressive

And when I collected all the tears and saw the "story" I genuinely got upset in a good way (at first), because man! Did they really got the balls to go that far? Is there nothing I can do for her? Now I MUST do all the temples, see how it plays out and --oh, I've got this cutscene already. Why are all the people so dumb about Zelda, I KNOW where she is, Link say something-- Link??

After finishing all the temples and almost falling asleep, I stopped playing the game, looked up the last boss and remaining cutscenes and went "Thats it?"

Watching other people (including you) being critically about so many things, both character and mechanical wise, I've almost startled myself with a realization what the gnawing feeling I constantly had, actually was.

Totk feels like a fanfic.

And don't get me wrong, I love fanfiction, I think its great and important, I adore fanfic writers, I love finding gems, I love reading self indulgent stories, see new spins and interpretation of characters. I love the casual, the passion, the creativity!

But totk gives me the same feeling everytime I am reminded that Fifty Shades is a Twillight fanfic.

The world is there. The faces I know and grew to love are there. But everything is ever so slightly different, uncannily so. Just how some characters talk, how they act, how they were placed in the story. The Zonai appearing out of nowhere, but no, they always had been there you see, they were these super magical advanced people but they all died, the king is so tragic. And you see, the king is super cool and powerful and-- oh I dont get to interact with him outside of the tutorial. Did they try to do another King Rhoam-- but wait, that only worked because we didn't knew he was a ghost-- totk wait stop why do you take him out of the story, why couldn't he be a companion, he IS ABLE TO TALK THROUGH THE ARM LET THE OLD GOAT COMMENT ON STUFF?? If you bring up all this ancient stuff and you still got a ghost lingering, let him talk?? (I never ended up getting Mineru but I smell wasted potential as well)

Im not even mad, I am disappointed. It feels like the devs saw what all the lore hunters got attached to and talked about and then just... took the "cool". All the Zonai stuff could've easily been Sheikah tech, but got just reskinned to look more exciting instead of being its own thing.

Like... at this point I prefer what fans are doing over what Totk gave us. The characterization of Rauru (and everything Zonai), projects like you do of what totk couldve been, the little nuggets of actual highlights and details of love fans find in the game. I found much more enjoyment in these concepts than I got from a 70bucks game. And thats depressing.

I love fanfiction. I dont love it when my corporate 70 dollar, six year development, console exclusive game feels like a story that passionate fan couldve written miles better in a week (and I've already seen much cooler and interesting rewrites and ideas).

Zelda has been a huge part of my childhood and its depressing seeing it treated like that. It always was about the story, the epic, its The Legend of Zelda for crying out loud. To be courageous to enter a dungeon, to be wise and solve all the riddles. To become powerful over the journey you embarked on. Zelda to me is the campfire story you tell to others and go into the woods or the beach and imagine what monsters you would slay. Zelda is not the sandcastle you build in the sandbox and then add dinosaurs and star wars ships because you didn't had any other toys, and just stumble into and over some story to entertain yourself until lunch is ready.

I'd have an oracle of seasons over another totk any day at this point. They should've just make the mechanics of totk its own thing, but I guess they were scared it wouldn't sell if it doesn't have a Mario or Zelda skin straped over it.

Anyways, sorry for the mini rant - love your art, love your thoughts and insights, and I am looking forward to see more of it - Zelda related or not (your original characters look amazing, I adore your style sm)

Hope you have a great rest of the day!

*nods along through this entire rant*

idk how many of my rants you have read but yeah ... yeah ... and the further you think about it the further it all falls apart, the wasted potential of it all and the goddamn audacity of them to do those interviews in which they make it EVEN WORSE is just

i know the expectation for a direct sequel to botw was huge and understandbly so but i really REALLY think it would not have been that hard to make it a good follow up even taking into account that totk was originally a DLC, pretty much all of botws aspects could have been developed further, i dont know what could have happened to make totk have turned out like this .. literally it feels like something had to have gone wrong, its like someone who doesnt know zelda nor botw at all was given a few prompts and then just made some generic fantasy story while the rest worked on ultrahand for 5 years

the technical impressive things ARE technical impressive, but i dont think it was necessary nor served the game well in any way (and i LOVE building games- however totk is neither a building game nor a story game nor a zelda game nor an exploration game nor a sequel imo) but zelda, this zelda, is not made for that and i cant help but think it was mainly to encourage people to make some ridiculous mechs so it can go viral on tiktok (not trying to discredit them, it IS cool what they are doing but i .... have my doubts if zelda is the right place for that)

ill stop there bc i have ranted so much about everything i dont wanna repeat it here again; it just doesnt feel like a real game (derogatory), it feels extra bad bc i was not really into zelda when botw came out and while i did get it as soon as i could (months after release since i just started a minijob and didnt have the money) i only over time grew to love zelda this much again, devouring any theories and anything about it bc i loved it so much- i was never into it like this when a new title was announced and dont own any special editions so i bought the totk collectors bc i was just so damn excited for it after the 2019 trailer dropped (god i want that time back ... it looked so much more like it was going to be an actual sequel) even if i was already worried it wouldnt be good at that point given how much i started to sense stuff i dont like about the newer trailers

i recently sold it at our local gameshop bc it was like a thorn in my side given how expensive it was and how dissapointed i was in the game, i genuinely think that, technical impressiveness aside, totk is the onyl zelda i truly cannot stand (for alot of reasons) and im genuinely worried for the future of the franchise

i bought an Oki (Okami) figurine for what i got back and i feel much happier with that :3

(also on a note, i did finish the game two weeks after release but stopped playing it right then and hadnt touched it since, i also streamed all of what i played and its still up if you want to see my slow descend into madness fjkdhkdhjk though its been a long while since then and i by far did not talk about everything back then, just what my most immediate frustrations were while still playing)

(also the gameplay isnt as good as people make it out to be, so much is so frustrating and punishing to use i am kinda baffled it got through like that and most people call that its best aspect ..... though i guess if the rest is so much worse even mid gameplay can seem good ooooooooh how dare i)

also thank you for liking what i do!!! <3 it means alot to know it is appreciated by someone :D

[cloudcountry]

hi aubbie!! i saw that you wanted ikevamp requests so i couldn't help but pop in hehe. i'd like to request a shy florist mc who isn't great at talking to people, but likes expressing her feelings through bouquets of flower language (if that makes sense?) maybe with issac and arthur whoever else you'd like! of course, as always, you don't have to write it if u dont want to! (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)♡

SUMMARY: arthur is enamored with the reserved florist & isaac stumbles about her.

WARNINGS: None!! :D

COMMENTS: rinrin i would LOVE to write this for you HAGSGFDHAGS i see that crossed out arthur you don't have to hide that from me hehe

I WROTE WAY MORE THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD...maybe i shsould make this an au. you're genius rinrin. i have never been so inspired.

ALSO I WANTED TO DO VINCENT but he might get his own post because sunflowers are my favorite and i just cried over them oops

It’s been a quiet day at the shop, and you’re working on an arrangement of flowers when an arm slams against the wall behind you. You jump out of your skin as you whip around, coming face to face with none other than your newest regular.

“Hello there, love. I missed you today.” he purrs, leaning in far too close to your face, “You look as lovely as ever. It’s a shame I didn’t see you this morning when I came by.”

“I...I was working on something.” you mumble, eyes darting to the floor in embarrassment. Arthur tsks and tilts your chin up, making you make eye contact with him. You squirm, feeling heat rise to your cheeks at the touch, and he grins because he knows.

“What were you working on, love?” he asks, his tone flippant, “I would love to see your newest project, although I doubt it’s as lovely as the woman in front of me.” He winks, and you feel like shriveling up. He’s such a flirt, he does this to every woman he comes across, but you can’t help but wish it was special to him.

“I...I can show you.” you murmur, docking under his arm, “Just follow me.” You skitter towards the back of the shop, walking much faster than you usually would as Arthur trails behind you curiously. You hear him say something along the lines of I’d follow you anywhere but you ignore it.

He whistles quietly when he sees the arrangement you’ve put together, violets and blue roses and white chrysanthemums blooming inside their vase. Your heart is pounding in your ears as you recite the meanings to yourself, hoping he understands what they mean while also hoping he doesn’t. Trust, loyalty, deep love—

“It’s beautiful, love.” he compliments, reaching out to brush his fingers against one of the roses, “You always blow me away with your arrangements.

“Um.” you swallow thickly, snatching up the two bows from the tabletop and holding them out of him, “Which one do you like better?”

He laughs, giving you an affectionate look. “What does it matter, love? You always make the best decisions.” You huff, gnawing at your bottom lip. He doesn’t understand.

“Just pick one!” you blurt, and he jolts a bit at your demand. Slowly, he reaches forward and takes your left hand. his fingers intertwine with yours, trapping the ribbon in your fist.

“This one.” he smirks, reveling in your obvious embarrassment. You rip your hand away from his and get to work, tying up the bouquet with the ribbon he chose. Arthur watches you work, something you’ve gotten used to since he gains an interest in you.

“For you.” you mumble when you finish, presenting the bouquet to him with a hot face and shaky hands, “I made this for you.”

He hums thoughtfully and takes it from you, cradling it in his arms like it’s the most precious thing he’s ever received. “Thank you so much, love.” he says softly, and when you look up at him he isn’t smirking and leering, he’s smiling softly at you, “Let me take you out sometime, yeah? My treat.”

There’s another bouquet at the front door, and once again it is addressed to Isaac. The physicist fumbles over his words as he takes it from Dazai (who is smiling far too brightly for Isaac’s liking.)

Arthur wolf whistles and mocks him all throughout breakfast, joking about his secret admirer and guessing who it could be. A mother of a child he teaches? One of the employees from that cafe he frequents?

No pleas from Isaac to cease their teasing work, and he finds himself storming into his room to escape the jeers. Leave it to Arthur to make innocent affections seem so filthy and off-putting!

He furrows his brow as he sets the bouquet on his desk, the flower's various shades of pink and red. He can recognize roses well enough, but the other flowers' specific classifications evade him.

One thing’s for sure—this is not a bouquet of friendliness. Whoever sent these flowers to him wishes to pursue something with him. And in the back of his mind, the place in which he dares not travel, he finds himself wishing it was the awkward florist he visits.

It all started with the children and their growing interest in biology. Napoleon brought up the small florist’s shop that had opened right next to the cafe Isaac loved so much, and all of the children were ecstatic to visit.

It was there that he met her, a woman that fumbled with her words but was so deft with her hands. She’d won over the children almost instantly, and they’d swarmed her with questions. She’d even handed them all dandelions as a thank-you for visiting, and despite her shyness, offered to host them again.

After endless pleas to visit the nice flower lady, Isaac couldn’t resist. He’d found himself in that flower shop time and time again, and even though he’d never admit it, most of his visits were for her.

She was intelligent in a way that was different from his own intelligence. She thrived on hypothetical meanings and things that held no grounding in actual science, and it was intriguing as it was scary.

He shakes those thoughts away and slumps down in his chair, resting his head in his hands. It hadn’t been that long, only a few weeks, and yet he was utterly enamored by her. It was strange and new, it was terrifying, it was everything Isaac had never known.

Sighing again, deeper this time, he sits back in his chair. The bouquet rests on his desk, where it mocks him with every second that passes. Would he ever know who was sending these? Would he dare ask?

Isaac shakes his head and vows to find another vase to place this bouquet in. He’ll preserve them for as long as he can (at least he knows that much, he couldn’t live with himself if he let such pretty gifts die quickly) and hopefully, someday, he’d gather the courage to ask her about the flowers.

[harrysrealgf]

YOU STOLE MY HEART

summary: harry and y/n have been going out for a while and everything seems perfect, that is until his heather comes around and y/n feels insecure.

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

“y’are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever laid my eyes on. y’know that honey?” He smiled, playing with your hair, slowly tucking it behind your ear.

“H, stop im blushing.” she giggled. she put her face onto the bed where they were both laying on their stomachs.

Harry was never a romantic when it came to his past relationships. But y/n was and when they met Harry thought he couldn’t have seen anything more beautiful.

“C’mon pretty. Look at me.” He tilted his head and brushed your hair lightly with his fingers.

You put your head up but your eyes were closed.

“Open y’eyes.”

You opened your eyes only to feel his stare at you and you thought you could never be in love with anyone like the way you were with harry. You just hoped he felt the same way about you.

“H, can we talk?” you ask shyly.

“O’course lovie. What's the problem?” He was scared of what this talk was going to be about.

“It's not a problem I just… I want to make sure we're on the same page.” she was picking at her fingers out of nervousness.

“In what way exactly my love?” He put his hand on top of hers to stop her from picking.

“Im completely in love with you H.” He didn’t expect this and his eyebrows raised. “And I just want to know if you love me as much as i love you. Because I don’t know how you feel about me.”

He chuckled. But not in a bad way, in a way like are you serious?

“Y/n, of course i love you. I was just telling you two minutes ago how you were the most beautiful thing in the universe.” He smiled.

“Yeah but… is beauty all that matters? Like,” She sighed. “I know i’m pretty, but I don’t only want to be pretty. And i want to work for the things I want. I don’t want to just be handed them like most pretty girls.”

“Y/n. You are the smartest most loyal girl ive ever known. You are very beautiful, but you are my whole world. I love you with every inch of my body honey. If i ever bring myself to hurt you in any way, or say the opposite to any of this shit, i want you to know i dont mean it.”

“I love you.”

“I love you to baby.” He smiled caressing your cheek. “Now c’mere and gimme a kiss.”

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

“That’s Heather.” Harry said looking over at the dazzling woman. It's like he couldn’t take his eyes off her and it was horrible.

“Oh, she's gorgeous.” I try to not sound jealous.

“I-I know, right?” That shattered everything inside y/n. She started to gnaw on her nails again. Harry was very observant and always notices small things, so when he saw Y/n, he knew he did something wrong.

“Baby, what's wrong?” He looks down at her.

“Are you- um..” She clears her throat. “Are you over her?” Knowing Harry used to like her, she looks down and then up at him for a split second.

He hesitated, shocked she asked that. “O-of course i am. You and I are together.” She scoffed.

“You hesitated.” She said under her breath.

He didn’t really have anything to say to that so he just watched her walk off to go get a drink.

a couple of hours later Harry can't seem to find y/n. He’s freaking out because he doesn’t want her hurt.

“Hey Ni, have you seen y/n?” He walked up to Niall and asked.

“No— Wait wait wait… I think I saw her go upstairs with some people. I think they’re playing truth or dare or something.” He was slurring all his words.

That must’ve blown something in him because suddenly he was storming upstairs going through every room to find her until he actually did.

“Oh hey y/n.” He smirked.

“Oh my gosh! Harry!” You were shit-faced drunk and harry knew it. realistically if there wasn’t alcohol at this party, you would’ve already left.

You ran up to him and jumped in his arms. Heather just so happened to be in this room.

“Guys isn't my boyfriend just so handsome.” She smiles, playing with his curly hair.

“I love you.” She exaggerated her you.

“You’re drunk.”

“Dude I know.” She slurs together

They both look over at heather who rolled her eyes.

“Guys! Let's play spin the bottle.” Heather suggested. Everyone laughed and agreed even Y/n. But Harry didn’t want her to do it.

“Cmon harry! Just trying to live with im young. Don’t be such an old man, play it with me.”

“Fine.”

They sat down in a circle and Heather went first. It landed on Harry and that's when you went completely sober. Realizing the prettiest girl in the room was about to kiss your boyfriend pissed something inside of you off.

“No.” You said audibly.

“Girl cmon. It's just a game.” She rolled her eyes getting closer to Harry. Harry had no response and just sat where he was to begin with.

“I said, no. Spin the fuckin’ bottle again.”

“Y/n... It's just a game and you’re the one who wanted me to play this game. It's just a kiss it doesn't mean anything.” Harry said as he shrugged.

“… Are you serious?” You gave him a blank stare. “No. Y’know what? Im leaving.” She stood up and left the room.

“Y/n-“ Harry was cut off by the door slamming.

“So can we kiss now?” Heather said.

“Heather, Read the room.” Liam said.

Harry chased y/n out of the room.

“y/n please stop.” Harry said and she actually listened and turned back to him.

“What is wrong with you H?”

“Whats wrong with me? What's wrong with you? You’re freaking out over stupid shit. It was just a game that you wanted me to play with you. You don’t have to take your stupid little insecurities out on me.”

“No. Because you of all people should know how hard it is for me to see that happening. The only reason i wanted to play was to see if Heather would try anything on you and she did. H, you say you can't bring yourself to hurt me but you keep doing it! You say you don’t mean to do it but it keeps happening.” At this point, there were tears streaming out of your eyes. “I don’t don’t know if its this alcohol or the fact you really screwed me over, but i don’t think i can be with you anymore. I just hate the fact it took me so long to find out how mean you are H. Did you even mean anything you said to me?”

“Of course, I did honey. I love you…” He was tearing up.

“Im having a hard time believing that considering people don’t constantly hurt who they love.”

“Y/n. Petal, please. I love you more than anything. Please Don't leave me.” He was sobbing at this point. He was like a full sub right now.

“I don’t want to! I just want to be treated right and if you can't do that then we need to split up.” She sighed through her tears. “I wish i could hate you. Maybe then it wouldn’t hurt as much.”

“No baby. Please let me just drive you home… And let's just talk.. please. I cant lose you.”

She nods. “God why can't I stop loving you.”

[deadqueernoldor]

End of Year Fic Recs!

I got tagged by @camille-lachenille for this, and boy I havent had time to read fic in a hot minute but this was literally the perfect opportunity to go through my ao3 and tumblr bookmarks again! Also I feel really bad that I couldnt get 5 for the first 3 categories, so pls dont take it personal if I forgot. My tagging system is a mess and idk if it works but if you want more tumblr writing recs go into the "writing that has me foaming out the mouth like a rabid dog" tag I have at the top of my account.! There's so many good drabbles and ficlets i couldnt possibly name them all! Also i likely could have tagged other author's tumblr accs but i didn't feel like looking bc I'm exhausted. I love these all sm

Also I cheated with the self rec bc one is from 2022 but I didnt want to rec only my OC lol

Recommend up to 5 series or multi-chapter fics from 2023 that everyone should read (multi-year WIPs count, if the last update was in 2023).

Beneath a Boundless Sky by @runawaymun — ongoing — Rating (M)

Summary: Elrond’s two new wards both struggle to feel at home in Rivendell. The wounds from their slavery in King Frumgar’s court are still fresh, and the scars are deep -- and they’re not the only ones. Maglor is home at last, but each day he lives he is haunted by guilt and grief. Elrond is nothing if not patient, and he is certain that given enough time in Rivendell, all three will heal.

I am always frothing at the mouth at OCs and world building and this work *and the prev work/part 1 of the series* is SO good

dare you see a soul at the white heat? by millyfaraway — ongoing — Rating (M)

Summary: Lómion is reembodied, but struggles to cope. His uncles try to help.

BABY BOY GETS FAMILY THERAPY ABBY BOY SLOWLY GETS CONFIDENCE AND PUPPY LOVE SOBBIG ITS WHAT HE DESERVES anyway go read

The Last Heir of Fëanor - Part Two by Astrance — 87k — Rating (T)

Summary: This is the second part of the tale of the surviving child of Celebrimbor of Eregion and how she fared through the Ages of the world. From the Fall of Ost-in-Edhil to Imladris and the vastness of Second Age Eriador, the fight against Sauron seems never ending. Plans have been set in motion across the Misty Mountains, but, in Lindon, many tasks await.

Have I mentioned how much I love OCs? This is literally one of the best OCs I've read, flaws and all, and the way the whole thing is written is chefs kiss. Cant decide if I'm sweating from the amount of sobbing I've done with this work *and the previous/first part* or because of the delicious angst.

and rain will make the flowers grow by @swanmaids — 800 — Rating (G)

Summary: Glorfindel and Idril; on the Helcaraxë, in Nevrast, in Gondolin.

THEM. THEM. THEM. That's all I have to say. bUT THEM!

Recommend up to 5 single chapter fics/one-shots (long or short) from 2023 that everyone should read.

your veins are empty of dust by @echo-bleu — 1.7k — Rating (G)

Summary: Anairë finds her late one day in her workshop, surrounded by slabs of stone larger than her. Nerdanel is hammering forcefully at one of them, the barest hints of an elven shape already taking form in the marble. Bitter, stinging tears run down her cheeks and into her collar, and her arms ache with exhaustion.

The body is only barely sketched, but the face is already chiselled, smooth curves and angular cheekbones.

Fëanáro emerges out of the marble, looking like he’s about to take life.

(Across the sea, her sons lead a funeral.)

Frothing. Gnawing. I love the writing. The angst. Fucking mourning. Gimme all and then hurt me some more.

Babysitting #01 by @lordgrimwing — more chaps likely, atm oneshot

Excerpt: "She brought her children."

"Who did?”

"That Elwing woman, the pro bono case Celegorm talked me into."

Modern!scenario fix with Exhausted!lawyer!maedhros. He's tired and that's very sexy of him. Maglor is secy. They all are. Idiots. But very sexy. Elrond and Elros best boys. No argument.

Dreams of Doom by @camille-lachenille — 3.8k — Rating (M)

Summary: “She runs in the dark, alone. Where her feet carry her, she knows not, and her heart is heavy with dread. Someone - something - is watching her.”

Niënor from the moment she arrives in Brethil to her death.

THE ANGST THE LOVE THE TENDERNES THE FORESHADOWING I AM BITING THIS BC I CANT FIND GLASS TO CHEW.

Recommend up to 5 fics NOT from 2023 that everyone should read (oldies but goodies.)

Those Peaceful Hours by SpaceWall — 3.9k — Rating (T)

Summary: At the end of the Third Age, faced with her impending return to the home she left before the sun, Galadriel seeks out the one person who will understand her fears and grief.

It's so well written and the premise as a whole is so great!. Compelling and Galadriel characterisation is just so very sexy to me.

Their oath will drive them, and yet betray them by musing_and_writing — 2.2k — Rating (G)

Summary: Elrond had hours to spare, and if Maglor wished to spend the short time they had together reminiscing, he would not blame him for it. As Maglor began singing, Elrond settled himself across the clearing in his own bed of autumn flowers. Maglor’s voice resounded in the clearing, clear and powerful, just as it had upon his fortress’s ramparts as he pushed back Morgoth’s forces with a Song, just as Elrond assumed it must have echoed before the poisoning of the Trees in his family’s halls as Feanor crafted his cursed jewels.

Hehehehehe cryptid mf with a heart I love it the angst the tenderness it's just so *holds gently* while also *bodychecks maglor*

Double The Baggins, Twice The Took by fogisbeautiful — 138.5k — Rating (T)

Summary: The Baggins twins, Briallen and Bilbo, have spent their whole lives taking care of each other. So when the world outside makes an (uninvited) appearance, only one thing is certain. Not for wizard or king or mountain or dragon will the two of them part. Not if they have one word to say about it.

And besides, as Gandalf points out: It never hurts to have a spare burglar on hand.

I'm a sucker for Thorin x hobbit, and you give me a fic with bilbo's sister who's so lovely characterized? I'll kiss you sloppy style

The One With All The Birds by clothonono — 46.5k — Rating (G)

Summary: Would it never end? Would there always be one more mother standing on the shore, looking out to sea, full of a grief made more terrible by hope?

Elwing and Nerdanel in Valinor in the Fourth Age; a story about children coming home.

I think swanmaids recc'd this to me once upon the time when it hadn't been finished and I want to kiss their forehead for it. It's so good! Go read bc I lick my screen every time I re-read it.

Recommend up to 5 of your own fics (completed or WIP) from 2023 that everyone should read.

Bitter end — 6.4k — Rating (T)

Summary: Maglor has one brother left.

Both have one more fight in them.

The ghost you dress up as (knows how to haunt) — ongoing — Rating (M)

Summary: Maedhros was not the first Finwëan to be captured and taken to Angband, nor did he remain there the longest. Ranyatinwë, twin of Caranthir, was the first.

She escapes.

(Series) Old Maggie Took — 7 works — 402k — all Rating (G)

Summary: The headcanon about Maglor, second son of Fëanor, lives hidden in the Shire? Yes.

[perilegs]

yeah i love happy transgender characters but sometimes i personally crave the catharsis of seeing some transgender suffering similar to what i have felt and this post is going to be me rambling (and by rambling i mean spamming screenshots) about the house in fata morgana and discussing vague spoilers bc i have to get at least some of these worms out of my brain before i can sleep. this will be very long and make 0 sense so i dont expect anyone to read it all but if you do im sorry and i love you. also theres going to b transphobia and dysphoria and being super edgy and broody

first of all this man gets outed to the love of his life as transgender and

being rejected for it and ive had my fair share of being outed and my god. rereading makes me feel like gnawing my arm off. are you seeing this.

and. ok not not to be mr mommy issues on main here but this guy doesn't have a great relationship with his mom. im referring to him as this guy bc his name is kind of a spoiler probably i think so bear with me. anyways. his mother has and will always see him as her beautiful little girl. this guy is just trying to live his life and. my god. my ramble is going to be nothing but screenshots but like im currently so unwell about the frequency this game resonated with my soul with

i know this will seem like the most boring edgy and gloomy transgender guy who suffers too much to a lot of people but you have to understand that i love suffering and have a difficult relationship with myself and some around me. i am being so fuckign cringe and exposing my ass a bit too much here over something that seems mediocre to a lot of people but the way this is all written just. makes me feel a lot. lets look at this guy's childhood

this guy transforming from a girl into a man and looking into the mirror and saying "This... is me..." people looking into a mirror and seeing themselves is a trope that will never get old. to me.

meeting his less than supportive family after transitioning:

this is just going to be screenshots im a bit unwell about. there's one part im especially unwell about but it's too big of a spoiler to get into but a spoiler free way of saying it is this guy's mother caused like the biggest dysphoria moment of the century to him and spent several lines describing every single one of his feminine features. that's insane. i cant believe they wrote it. i mean yeah this is a game full of tragedy but! ouch!

this next one isnt about transgenderism but thinking about it too hard makes me. mghmghgnf,hd.

moving on to more things that make me feel a lot of things

more mommy issues

anyways.

[turtleraccoonsoup]

Been being very mentally unstable recently and felt like finding the romance of tearing the flesh of a person i hate apart with my teeth while shes still alive and screaming. Here ya go freaks <3

(blood and murder and shit under cut)

"i bet you like my boyfriend, dont you you hoe ass bitch with no life" what the hell kind of thing is that to say to me as i sit down? Normal for her, i guess.

"no one likes your fucking boyfriend. He doesn't even like you. Would you fuck off already?" I hear a friend retaliate in defense.

"you dont have to be such a pick-me" she replied, shallow and bitchy as always.

Thats fucking it. The last damn straw in this slew of hate to my friends.

I lunge at her, others watching as i grab her arm in an iron grip, fueled by rage and hatred. I bite into her arm as she screams and struggles to get away, but fails. My teeth tearing into her skin, the sensation of it ripping in my mouth. Finally getting past the skin as a metallic flavor floods my mouth, blood pooling and flowing down my face, dripping to the floor. The flesh finally breaks apart as i separate it from the rest of her and turn away, spitting the chunk to the floor as people around us start screaming, but also cheering. My friends celebrating seeing the shallow asshole finally get what she deserves. I go in for another bite, the familiar sensation of skin in my mouth as i bite down again, warm blood once again flooding my mouth, the scent of nickel overpowering. Blood splatters before me, all over my face and clothes and the floor around us. I spit out the second chunk and go in for a third, this time getting stopped by bone. I gnaw on the bone and tear away small bits of flesh, going through her arm like a termite to a pice of wood. I push her down farther and stand up, covered in blood from head to toe as people rush over and i walk away, my friends guiding me to the bathroom in my hazy state. I know what i did was wrong, but it felt so good.

[quarktrinity]

quark watches star trek season 2 episode 19 (CW: firearms)

mccoy is a fucking nerd. lets look for Organisms

"quite like earth" looks like it too. wonder where they filmed it.

kirk is appalled to see that the aliens have reached the stone age

the fact that this episode is called "a private little war" makes me think that this gonna be about the cold war so heres my prediction: the soviets- i mean the klingons upgraded this alien society to be good at fighting and now the united states- i mean federation has to fight them and make them be nice

yeah kirk dont shoot the natives that have literally done nothing to you

/he throws a rock instead/

why do these guys have guns. who gave them guns. who am i kidding it was the klingons

obvious stage fall is hilarious

spock gets shot and all kirk can worry about is his space gun

aight bye

"his heart is where his liver should be" should be?? should be??? stfu mccoy

the klingons? noooo waaaayyyyyy

kirk is worried about his space boyfriend

whaaaaat you mean the klingons have interfered with a foreign society as a proxy to harm the federation without technically breaking their peace treaty?

cmon guys havent you learned the show structure by now. his intuition is always right all the time

"he'll live or die, jim" yes that is often the case

this is the kirk has anxiety episode

i want to gnaw on kirks neck like a dog toy. in like a sexy way

kirk? violating orders? wow

kirks got his tits AND his guns out. thank u star trek i love u star trek

kirk baps mccoys boob

space yeti jumpscare

space yeti evidently wants to gnaw on kirks neck as much as i do

its dead now

kirks been poisoned :(

"kirk is right about the people here" woah kirk was right? so weird how kirk was right

rare episode in which mccoy is the mvp

sexy murderess alien

this girl is brainwashing this dude into being horny for her i guess

kirks under a massive furry blanket. i want to be him rn. not poisoned and dying but under a massive furry blanket

hes so cozy

is this girl gonna brainwash kirk

were sexualizing kirk again

/slaps your boob/

this is straighter than straight sex

oh my god this is the horniest healing session ive ever fucking seen

kirks fine now

mccoy strokes kirks boob

"he is mine now" woah shes evil? crazy

through alien magic we can make malewives of you all

motif of domination in this episode. even in the b plot. normal tv show

this episode is extremely horny and extremely about the cold war in ways that are completely unrelated

"killing is stupid and useless" - dr leanord mccoy

metal gear solid ass stealth sequence

wow this is just like minecraft

pesky space ringtone, giving away our location

uh oh. methinks they just broke the treaty

they werent lying this war sure is private and little

spock demands nurse lady to hit him. weve covered 3/4 of the letters in bdsm. all thats left is bondage.

were teaching the aliens to shoot guns so they can fight the klingon-upgraded aliens. this could not be more about the cold war

THIS ISNT EVEN A METAPHOR ANYMORE KIRK IS DIRECTLY COMPARING THIS TO THE COLD WAR

i know that kirk is brainwashed because hes advocating for war

this isnt the first time kirks been brainwashed into being horny and im certain it wont be the last

dont break the bro code kirk

kirk broke the bro code :/

space yeti... 2!!

Helpless Woman Flailing

she took kirks space gun and shes not even using it right

star trek be normal about women please

Were All Fighting Now

literally just this image

lot of brown in this episode. pretty boring visual design

so. are you deciding not to arm the space proxy war, or are you just sad that you have to

thats it??? thats the episode?????

what was this even trying to say. i know its propaganda but what KIND

[wiihtigo]

24, 42, and 49 for the last character you were thinking of/searched for

24. Ship(s) that makes you cringe.

dickbabs SWEEEEEEEEEEP

its actually incredible to me that i was completely neutral on barbara and dick as a couple before the current romance arc involving them written by TOM TAYLOR (<-enemy) in the current nightwing run. The thing is that i think theyre cute as a couple but only when theyre batgirl and robin. I think it was like a cute kid crush thing that they grow out of. and even though thats my ideal dick and barbara in birds of prey were pretty cute too (especially with the added comedy of dick gnawing off his arm with jealousy because he thinks ted kord is stealing his girl when in actuality. Um. hes not.)

dickbabs vs dickory is such a stupid ass team jacob vs team edward argument but its becoming increasingly harder not to want to shoot them both with missiles whenever i see them now. and that has to do both with what dc is doing to my girl barbara and also tom taylors writing right now is obviously him trying to own the haters and its so embarrassing and cringe. which is sad bcuz oracle and nightwing are two of my absolute favorite gotham heroes (well bludhaven for dick. yknow what i mean)

42. What’s a fandom trope you hate?

i resent bea being reduced to boosters sassy third wheel to his and teds relationship especially since its like my favorite thing that booster and bea are like funhouse mirrors of eachothers mental illness. like why does booster get all the fun in being fucked up and crazy. beas crazy too! did you see what she was doing with sigrid nansen! beatora has so little fancontent in comparison to boostle but both relationships have a lot of parallels with eachother...(listen i know my tags ratios are uneven as well but i promise i have more in the back)

49. What’s [x]’s worst character trait?

hmm well on the topic of barbara gordon, and i need to preface this with saying that i dont hate this about her i actually think its awesome and interesting. I dont hate any of my faves worst traits its what i love hte most about them....

I love that shes straight up not very good with kids. Shes good buddies with tim because hes a super genius little boy so he can hang with her on her intellectual level. but barabara gets frustrated easily and impatient when people arent as smart or as capable as her. and i think thats awesome and really interesting. shes not cruel by any means and im thinking specifically of her mentorship of cassandra cain in batgirl 2000. throughout the whole comic they have a very close sisterly bond as barbara, as oracle, mentors her in being batgirl. For anyone who doesnt know cassandra, she cant read and is non verbal most of the time. when she does speak its in short or one word responses and a lot of times she copies what she hears on tv or mixes up words in her inner monologue. Here she needed to read a kill switch phrase to stop a robot from fucking shit up, but she cant read what it says and barbara snaps at her.

this causes a rift in their relationship for a long time and they dont speak for a lot of it. to be fair barbara here was uunder a ton of stress and was operating on like 1 hr of sleep and she did apologize but this really hurt cassandra and she didnt accept her apology (right away)

while reading this does hurt its one of my favorite barbara moments because its like. shes multifaceted bitch. her snapping at her in this way makes sense and is believable for her as a character. barbara has her strengths and her weaknesses and I just think putting herself at the level of teenagers is one of her weaknesses that i think is really interesting

[weekend-whip]

THE FUCKIN. THE FUCKING GOLD. GARMADON AND MYSTAKE!!!!!! LLOYD GETTING SO MUCH ACTUON AND WTF WAS THAT GOLD KICK??????????? ARE WE GONNA TALK ABIUT THAT????????? AND I LOVE KAI BEING THE ONE EVERYONE TURNS TO WHEN HOPE IS LOST LIKE! HES THE DRIVE!! HE PUSHES THEM FORWARD !!! AND GHE x4 AFTERSHOCK EFFECT!!! JESSE CALLING OUT HIS MOVES LIKE AN ANIME CHARACTER AND GETTING TO YELL “SURPRISE!”!!! AND THE CHASE SCENE WAS SO COOL AND LLOYD FINALLU GETTING TO FIGHT EVEN WHEN HE STILL CANT THROW!! AND JESSE AND COLE BONDING WITH THE MY HERO AND LIFTING HIM UP TO LOOK HIM IN THE EYES BECAUSE HES SO DAMN SHORT AND LLOYD BEING ABLE TO BOND WITH HIS GUARDIAN AND FEEL HER PAIN BUT THEN HAS TO WATCH HER DESTRUCTION. GOD FUCKING DAMNIT REN YOURE GONNA WAKE UP ONE DAY AND FIND THAT YOU DONT HAVE FINGERS SO THAT WAY YOU CANT TYPE AND HURT ME LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AARTGAHATAGGATSTAGGATAGATRS BARKABRAKRGGRGRGRGGRGRRR IM HOWINGFROTHING AT THE MOUTH BARKABRKABRKABRKNFJSKSILSARRGRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHGGHRGGRGRGGHRGRGRHHRGRGPOAUGSJANJAGVAGDHDBARKBARKVARKFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOUFUCKYOU

LISTEN LLOYD’S EITHER BEEN EVIL OR MIA FOR MOST THE FIC; he’s gotta play catch up on getting a cool moment or two in there! (Even if the sequel is mostly about him BUT THATS IRRELEVANT)

As for “gold kick”, well, there’s a very easy explanation but… I’ll save that for an Order Member to answer when the time is right ;) All Lloyd knows for now is that the Gold is an extension of his abilities, ones he can tap into at will (even outside TP), and when in Gold Mode (lol) it becomes easier for him to function when he can’t get as emotional about things—which happens for him a lot, so, sure hope he doesn’t start to abuse his Gold side or anything ;P

Kai still bringing up everyone’s spirits in the clutch!! Lloyd can do as much cool stuff as he wants, but Kai’s the one still pushing the group forward!!!

AFTERSHOOOOOCK!! Another part I’ve been dying to get to. Maybe things will look up in the future for them? 👀

And Lloyd bonding with the Great Devourer was always intended but I might’ve popped off a little too hard ahahahaaaaa….

*sees you gnawing on my arm* HMMM. Hmm. Hm. Please don’t take my fingers I happen to like them very much—

[bish-plz-haha]

Guess What

Years had passed. The nightmares, though still ever present in the back of my mind, were starting to cease, being replaced with dreams of cloudless skies, high grown grass blowing softly in a summer breeze, and him. Standing there, smiling at me like I turn the world with my every movement. And a smile spreads across my face, matching his. He's my safe haven; always has been, I just never opened my eyes—or my heart—enough to see it. He makes my heart flutter a million miles a minute whenever he smiles, laughs, grabs hold of my hand as we're walking. He silences the racing thoughts in my head: especially at night. When I wake up from a nightmare, his soft snores and warm heat caresses me and guides me back home and to a place I can finally rest peacefully.

"The school is coming along great." He says as he walks into the kitchen. The sun setting just on the horizon, the warm rays casting our kitchen into a orange glow. Empty jars and glasses reflect beautiful patterns onto the surface on which they sit. Its somehow calming, seeing the sun set every evening and rise every morning, knowing that I can peacefully watch on as the world does its thing as I do mine. "I'm almost finished that mural. Just a few final touches to be done tomorrow." He's happy, content with his life just as I am. "I think it reflects the values of this new state we live in." He joyfully pulled me in, my back pressed to his torso, his arms a belt around my middle. The pressure of his chin resting on my shoulder as he turned and pressed a gentle, chaste kiss to my neck reminding me that this is authentic and real and, sometimes, messy.

"Do you think the kids will like it?" I ask out of curiosity but also hope.

He gives pause before nodding as best he could against my shoulder. "I think so. I added in that painting of Rue I did." He didnt have to elaborate, I knew what he was talking about. The image came to mind as soon as he said her name. Tears welled in my eyes and a smile across my lips. I wasn't in tune with my feelings enough, even after all these years, to know if I was happy or sad; perhaps I was just somewhere in the middle.

"You always have had a way with kids." I tell him. I can feel the vibrations of his voice as he hums against my skin. It sends a wave of shivers down my spine. He leans his head down and kisses my shoulder gently before placing his head back into the crook of my neck. The view from the kitchen window is and always will be my favourite. It overlooks a wheat field. In the summer, its glowing golden and in the winter, it's a bed of what once was and will be again. We dont—or rather didnt—have many agricultural fields around what was once considered District 12. Now, though, the fence is gone and in the last five years since the fall of Panem, we have people coming from where District 11 used to be to help us with farming and agricultural things.

This is what peace is, I remind myself. But I have a wave of nausea in my stomach. Me and Peeta have always had open communication between us and not telling him my secret has been this thing that's been gnawing away at me from the inside. Guilt, I think. I have to tell him. I will, I tell myself, after dinner.

I dont. Dinner takes longer to catch than usual. Not sure what it is but the animals seem to be avoiding me: avoiding my old hunting grounds. Even the birds dont seem to flutter by in the air, landing on tree branches high up. But I get a Turkey eventually. It was nearly dark by the time I had plucked it and put it over the fire. Peeta had started a garden in our back yard so he had vegetables and herbs and roots stewing in a iron pot when I had gotten home.

"Well," he leaned back in his chair, patting his stomach. "I could never have imagined that I'd ever—" his sentence cut short by a yawn. He stretched into it before slumping forward and looking at his empty plate, "—be eating like this every day." My eyes flicked to his. There he goes with that damn contagious smile again. Every time it gets me to smile, no matter how bad I'm feeling or how hopeless the world seems. Especially in the days following the conclusion of the war. "I don't know about you but I'm ready for bed." He stretched his arms out, his back curving in as a grumbled noise came from his lips. Lips I kiss good night and good morning every day now in the privacy of my house. No cameras to watch, no one behind those cameras to impress—just me and him.

"I could go to bed." Watching him must've triggered my mind and body as I yawned. Peeta took my plate from in front of me and quickly rinsed them in the sink before grabbing my hand and guiding me to our bedroom.

After our bedtime routine of me laying quietly, thinking about my day with the sound of Peeta's book pages turning beside me slowly. He found that reading quiets his mind from the nightmares before we really, officially had each other. "I love you." Peeta said.

I smiled. I loved hearing his voice, especially in moments like these. Ehere his voice is soft and whispered as if the world was watching again but these words were just for me. "I love you too." I whispered back. He leaned over and kissed me softly before turning off the lamp on his side and settled in. I shimmied over to him and laid my head on his chest. He put his arm around me and instinctively, I nuzzled into him and his warmth, falling into a restful sleep.

The smell of bacon wakes me in the morning. Sleepily, I open my eyes and see the bed empty beside me. I have the feeling that my mouth should be watering but, in reality, my stomach churns and the bathroom seems to be a million miles away. I make it just in time for the contents—what little there are —of my stomach to come up.

"Katniss." I hear Peeta's footsteps climbing up the stairs. Before I even realise it, my hand is locking the door and the sink is on. I quickly rinse out my mouth. "Katniss?" His voice is right outside the door but with all my will, I cant seem to open the door. "Are you okay?" He knocks. His voice is soft, just like any other time he's speaking to me. I know I shouldn't be afraid, I know that the news will bring us closer together. But even knowing this, I'm still frightened. When I found out, I was scared because I—we—had been through so many life changing events that it altered us forever. What we went through is not something you come back from unscathed.

"Katniss, please open the door." His voice is barely above a whisper. And he's someone I can't say no to. Now, I will my body to move, to unlock the door, and I do, taking my place on the floor once again.

Peeta enters, a look of worry on his face. Gulping down any reservations I have about telling him, I will my voice to work. "I..." I take a breath, steadying my heart. It's the same method I use any time I'm about to make a kill. "I have something to tell you." I say. Peeta crosses over to me, taking the empty space beside me as an invitation, and takes my hand in his. His eyes, those beautiful, kind, caring eyes stare at me. Waiting for the information to pass my lips. I work up the courage and turn to him. "I'm-" The words are dead in my throat. They wont come out. As much as I try and will my mouth and vocal chords to work, they just don't. Damnit! Why wont my body work with me!

"You're...? You're what?" He asks after a minute. Time passes and I know that the lovely breakfast he must've cooked is probably getting cold, but I just can't. I feel a sense of fear wash over me—a fear of rejection. I know, logically and probably, that it's not real. But my brain is just running in circles with the idea that if I tell him, he's going to leave and that all those years of together will be for naught.

"You love me, real or not real?" I ask instead, just to calm my nerves.

He gives me a worried look, questions laced into it. "Real." He says, leaning over and capturing my lips with his. The kiss is slow, reassuring, full of love and devotion. "Katniss, what's going on?" He leans his forehead against mine, our noses brushing everytime one of us takes a breath. I know I must be scaring him. Hell, I'm scaring myself.

I take a shuddering breath. "I'm scared you'll leave." I tell him truthfully.

Without hesitation, he responds. "Never."

Steadying myself, I squeeze his hand for reassurance as I pull away to see his face. And a soft squeeze back gives me just that. It's time. "I'm pregnant." I tell him, just above a whisper. I'm hoping that I didn't mumble—God I'm hoping I didn't mumble. I don't want to repeat those two frightening words. They're scarier than the two words I shouted at the last official reaping.

His face remains in a neutral expression for a moment. A long moment. Did he not hear me? I'm not repeating it. I don't think I can. But then, the widest grin I have ever seen on anyone breaks out across his face and next thing I know, I'm engulfed by his warmth. I wrap my arms around him, tightly holding on like any minute he will be gone.

"That's amazing!" He gleefully responds. He pulled back only to pull me into him again for a seering, passionate kiss where fireworks displayed behind my eyes. And with that kiss, all the anxieties and reservations I had about telling him washed away; any doubts about this being growing inside me went down the drain with them. It's a new, brighter world. And this would be a new start