#god i can see it again and its so beautiful

[sanguineterrain]

temptation | jason todd

Summary: Still unsure about where you stand with your knight, you tiptoe around each other. Then you find him in a compromising position and learn more than you imagined ever knowing.

Pairing: knight!Jason Todd x AFAB!reader (no pronouns used)

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings/tags: smut 18+ only, male masturbation, voyeurism (dubcon because jason doesn't know he's being watched but jason very much wants the reader), whipping, self-flagellation, religious themes and guilt, breeding kink, somewhat submissive jason. arranged marriage themes. reader has been forced to live with jason.

A/N: i continue to be insane about knight jaytodd :)

the divider

Despite the lack of communication, a routine has been established between you and Jason.

Sometimes you cook, sometimes he cooks. Sometimes he goes to the market, sometimes you do.

Lately you've taken to doing the washing in the brook nearby. The summer heat makes the water refreshing. A few times, while Jason was away, you went upstream to play in the river. You don't know why you hid that from him. He does the same thing when he goes to bathe. You think about that every time—specifically, you remember the glimpse of his bare chest and broad shoulders.

It feels strange and maybe a little perverted to go to the river while Jason's home and think about his body. So you wait until he's out.

The house is empty. You've returned early from the market, so you carry the basket of dirty clothes to the brook.

And about halfway down the path, you hear it. Quick, choppy breaths.

You set down the basket and hide behind a tree. You peek first, not knowing what to expect. An animal? An intruder?

You see black curls, then the side profile of a sharp nose, a flushed cheek, parted lips.

Jason's shirt is untucked, shirt tails carelessly in the mud. His trousers have been shoved down. He's standing beside a tree, back to the water.

In his hand is his cock.

You've never seen one up close before. It looks big, even in Jason's already big hand. The tip is a deep crimson, slick with precum.

Jason's sounds are tight. You can barely hear him, but from the way he strokes himself, you see that he's very aroused.

"God, for–forgive me," he whispers, and speeds up. "I have given into t-temptation, ngh."

You squeeze your legs together, confused and alarmed by what the sight does to you. You can't tear your eyes from his hand and the thatch of hair peeking underneath his fist every time he moves.

You imagine him pushing into you. How full you would feel! And of course, impregnation. No doubt that Jason would impregnate you quickly.

Where would he take you? He's such a solemn, quiet man. You don't know if he'd take you anywhere but in his bed, between the sheets. Slowly, gently.

But as you watch him stroke himself, abuse himself and tug his cock hard, the thought of Jason taking you roughly flashes through your mind.

You'd like to be bent over in the kitchen, perhaps. Fucked on the table. You can hear its creaking as Jason thrusts into you, how he'd have to stop and steady himself so as not to snap the legs in two. He would pet your neck, your face, apologize as he wrecked you. And you would forgive him because he wouldn't be able to help it; all rational thought would leave your sweet knight once he pushed his fat cock into you.

You'd give him easy access that night. Serve his dinner and, in a moment of forgetfulness, bend down and show your puffy cunt, ready for him to push into.

You imagine how he'd stiffen, how he'd inhale sharply and pretend not to notice. Would he play with your cunt if you begged? Spread you across his lap and finger you until you shook with desire? Your beautiful knight, who so intently protects your honor. You'd give him your honor and more.

The sound of your name pulls you out of your head. Panic lances through you; have you been caught?

But no, Jason is still flushed and unaware. His eyes are a little wet. He says your name again and thrusts into his hand. More tears run down his cheeks.

"Forgive me," he says, then comes.

He's louder as he comes. He bites the soft curve of his thumb to muffle his sounds. Long spurts of seed coat his hand, and Jason soon forgoes muffling his moans and instead covers his cock with both hands to contain his release. But it's so much that it leaks through his fingers, dribbling onto his pants and into the dirt. He cries the entire time, cheeks dark. Eventually, the cries become high, sticky whines. He leans against a tree, cock soft.

Jason would breed you in the first go. You understand this. It's certain he would refuse you, were you brave enough to proposition him. You would be heavy with his child within the week.

He turns his head and you quickly duck behind the tree, holding your breath. You pray he hasn't seen you.

But Jason rustles in the grass after a moment, so you relax. You wish you could show yourself but whatever this is between you two is delicate and strange and won't be cured with sex. It won't.

You go further than normal and wash the clothes there, taking over an hour. You splash yourself with water before making the trek back to the house.

Jason isn't there when you return, so you hang the laundry alone, dreaming about a hot mouth on your neck and fingers inside of you.

You awaken the next morning to the sound of a whip.

The first time fades into the background. But the next three lashes make you get out of bed.

There's no sound that follows the lashes, which is the oddest part. No whinnies or animal squeals.

You go out barefooted, dirt already warm from the sun. Jason is in the yard.

In his right hand is the whip. On his back are four thin, bloody welts.

"Jason!" you say, hurrying to the yard.

He turns his head at the sound of your voice. Then he turns around and whips himself three more times in succession.

Your eyes widen. You grab his wrist with both hands, pulling hard. Jason drops the whip and stumbles back, slipping out of your grip.

He looks at you wide-eyed, chest heaving.

"I'm sorry," he says. "Have I... did I wake you?"

"Yes, of course you woke me! Why are you doing that?"

He immediately looks wracked with guilt. You soften, upset at yourself for being so harsh and frightened by your boldness. Have you forgotten your place so easily?

Then again, Jason's not so good at keeping you in your place either.

"It's alright that you woke me," you say. "I'm not angry about that."

Jason shakes his head. "I should've been quieter. Self-punishment deserves no spectator."

"Why are you punishing yourself?"

"Because I—" He shakes his head. "I have sinned. I have been... selfish. Desired things that aren't mine to want."

You reach for him, comfort like an instinct. Jason backs away.

"Please," he says, chest heaving. "Please don't touch me. I beg you."

His words sting. You drop your hand.

"You don't need to punish yourself," you say carefully. "You've done nothing wrong. You've... you've been nothing but kind to me."

Jason shakes his head. "If you knew..."

His eyes sweep over your body. You watch as guilt overtakes him.

"I have lost sight of my duty. I must overcome my desires."

"You're allowed to have desires," you say.

"Not these," he says heavily.

You watch him for a moment. He stares unseeingly in the distance. Blood from his back drips on the ground.

You take a deep breath and pull down one shoulder of your night shirt. Then you pull the other. Jason's head darts back. His eyebrows go to his hairline.

Neither of you move for a moment. Then you pull your shirt down further. Air hits your skin. You're almost to your nipples.

You look at Jason. He swallows hard and tries to angle his body away from you. It doesn't work. You stare openly at his bulge. Just the suggestion of your body gets him hard and ready.

"I'm sorry," he says, eyes wet. "Please—God, please forgive me."

Something alights in you at the thought of Jason's obedience. He may think his capacity to breed is a sin, but his body can't help but react. He's ashamed of how quickly his cock fattens, eager to spurt.

You wonder if he'd hardened shortly after he came yesterday afternoon. If he'd cried in embarrassment at how fast his body betrayed him, demanding he release his desire.

Even after a whipping, he's hard for you. Would he still be hard if you were the one holding the whip? Would he come if you struck him?

You pull down your shirt and release one breast. The air hardens your nipple.

Jason whines low in his throat, strangled and desperate.

"Please," he whispers. "Take mercy."

This is insanity. What will you do? Strip and have him take you in the mud?

Truthfully, you'd much rather he shamefully comes in the dirt. Even if it is a waste of seed. You like how dark his cheeks get.

So, you stop. Jason looks to the sky, likely praying for forgiveness.

"I'm going to make tea," you say, shirt still lowered.

He nods, body tight with tension. You walk across the yard and back inside. Then you pull up your shirt and prepare tea.

As the water boils, the whip whistles through the air six more times.

[bluestdai]

✦ toys and a doll

noah just wants to play with you and turn you into a muted doll before he fucks you with his cock..

you're on your bed, laying on your back, fully naked. you have no idea what he wants to do, all you know is that he told you to strip, get on the bed and wait for him; and you've been waiting, for a long time now.. staring at the ceiling is driving you crazy cause your brain won't and can't stop thinking about what exactly noah is planning on doing.

"you're ready for me?" he walks to the room with a little smile

"i've been ready for a while now" you sound like you're mad at him for making you wait so long and well, you kinda are.

"be careful there, it's not a good time to act so bratty right now" he says as he walks towards you, holding a box.

"what is that?" this is the first time you're seeing this box.

"we're gonna do something different tonight, i think you'll like it" he runs his hands on your thighs, "now give me your pretty hands, " a few seconds you're in the happy baby pose, your wrists and ankles are tied together -with the rope he got from his box- and your thighs are wide open.

"what are we doing?" you ask noah, you feel like you have a hint of what's about to happen but you're not sure really.

"we're gonna have fun and you're gonna be a good girl for me, okay?" he asks as he runs a finger on your exposed core, you clench your muscles but your legs are so far apart that it doesn't feel like you did anything. you nod yes and watch him open his box. he takes out a few vibrators in different sizes and shapes, a plug and a few other things that you can't see clearly cause he's blocking your view.

"we're gonna use those?" you ask.

"i am.. you just lay there and be my good little doll, no need to do anything. i want to see how good you can be for me" your core gets warmer with every word he speaks. he turns to you and brings a few of those stuff and throws them on the bed.

"look at that, a little impatient aren't you?" he touches your cunt that is now throbbing and plays with your entrance that is leaking.

noah picks one of the smaller vibrators, puts it on medium strength and slowly slids it inside your cunt, you moan the second you feel the vibration on yourself. "right there" he says when he pushes it deep inside you and your cunt swallows the toy, "you're just perfect".

then picks up the plug, puts lube on it and fills your ass with it. you whine as it enters your body, you try to relax your muscles but being tied like this doesn't let you do that.

"you're doing great, relax for me" he caress your inner thighs.

a ball gag is the next things he picks up and puts in your mouth, "god, you look beautiful" he says after fastening the gag around your jaw.

he sits on the bed in front of you and gently caresses your thighs, you're still feeling the vibrator inside you and with every touch you moan involuntary.

noah spits on your cunt and spreads his saliva with his fingers on you, circling your clit and shoving the vibrator deeper inside you with his thumb makes you whine louder and when he stops touching you, you whimper in protest.

"look at you, all of your holes are full. not even one left for my cock and you want more??" he says as he pinches your clit, "this isn't enough? you want more? needy sooo needy" he continues playing with you to get more whines out of you.

"i'll give you more don't worry" he takes out his dick and strokes it a few times, spits on your core again and starts rubbing it with his tip. the warmness of his tip feels so comforting. but he's not planning on comforting you tonight, he picks another vibrator off the bed, puts it on max speed and presses on your swollen clit, you whine and feel like you can't stop. "you sound like a lost puppy, so pretty" he presses the vibrator on your clit even harder.

he rubs his cock on your inner thighs and feeling the its soft skin on your skin makes you dizzy, you need it inside you more than anything.

"i want to fuck your little holes so bad, i really do, but there's nothing left for me" he says as he stretches your cunt with both thumbs. "you think i'll fit here?" he ask you and you nod yes, the vibrator still on your clit and you can barely control your muscles from shaking so fast, "i think you're forgetting how much i have to stretch you to fit inside, and there's already a toy inside.." he pouts and presses the vibrator harder on your clit when he sees your eyes roll back. your toes curl, your legs shake, your vision goes blurry when you reach your orgasm.

"there she is.. my pretty girl" he caresses your face as the vibrator still vibrates inside you.

"want more?" you cant really answer but you know he's gonna give you more.

he puts two fingers inside your cunt and takes out the vibrator, kisses your cunt a few times and spits on it again and in one move his cock is inside you. you feel his balls clapping on your core with his deep thrusts.

he put the vibrator on your clit again and you start whimpering from the overstimulation, your vision goes blurry but this time because tears are forming, a lot of them.

"do you like this more?" he shouldn't be waiting for an answer when there's tears and drool running down your face.

he unties the ball gag and asks you again, "if you don't like it just tell me" and he pounds into you harder, "you can't talk? aww" he thrusts get faster and faster. he pusher your legs -and hands- further away from eachother to force you to make sounds that you've never made before.

your tears won't stop coming and you feel your second orgasm coming, he feels your grip around his cock getting tighter, so he plays takes away the vibrator from your clit, "not before i fill your pretty cunt"

he does what he says he's gonna do, filling you up with his load and then spreading it all over your cunt. he puts the vibrator on your clit -that is covered in a layer of his cum now- and shoves a dildo inside your hole again. you cum immediately and keep crying.

"fucked my sweet baby too dumb? don't cry we're done now" he unties you and messages your wrists and ankles.

"you did so good for me" he wipes sway your tears with his thumb, "you know how pretty you look right now?"

you blush at his words, "there's my pretty baby with her pink cheeks" he caresses your flushed cheeks.

"can we rest a little?" you ask him, your spent body feels like it needs to days worth of sleep.

"of course we can baby, we can lay here as long as you like" he kisses your forehead.

[7nessasaryevils]

We are back, my beloveds!!! Ep 8 what fresh hell awaits me??

- WE COMING OUT SWINGING SON OF A BITCH: yak's little smile and the immediate way he goes to take off the necklace cause he knows... his heart is someone else's now 😭😭

- bolster light effect my beloved... how I have missed you 🥺🥺🥹

- "if you take it back again, you're a dead man": tell me you're married without telling me you're married

- this boxer is yours.... FUCKING LET ME BREATHE ITS NOT EVEN A MINUTE INTO THE SHOW

- Dee taking accountability for how his words hurt Yak... ohhh emotional growth how wondrous you are

- man said "you broke up with me" SIR YOU WEREN'T EVEN DATING

- Dee leading Yak back home (count one of I'm so fucking fine)

- the Phadetsuk family is under my protection and if someone breathes on them wrong I'll sit on them NO ONE TOUCHES MY BABIES

- Yak's stomach growled and my dumbass thought it was my stomach growling....

- awwww family dinner time!

- Cher being fucking awesome as always

- Taem... darling... the sad glow in your eyes is hurting me 🥺 you had your chance with Yak...

- of course Yak didn't answer; he was too busy cuddling his Mho Dee ♥️

- Yak, sir... I see you... whatchu thinking in that pervy head of yours hmmmm? 🤨🤨🤨

- never mind... I know exactly what is going on in that PERVY head of yours 🤣🤣🤣

- OIL MASSAGES MY SEXY BELOVED

- gentlemen!!! Avert your gazes!!! 🤣

- awww Dee trying to understand more about Yak's world

- the most fashionable Grim Reaper is back.... and continues to scare the shit out of me

- Dee knows something's wrong!!! Yeah baby, get ready to call out your man!

- the fact that Dee knows about the hallucinations Yak saw... that means Yak told him!

- Ter... you lowlife dried up dog shit human turd crap being... may your scrubs always have a rip in them! May your phone never charge! MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE AN IN GROWN TOE NAIL!!!

- LIKE FUCK DEE IS GONNA GO WITH YOU YOU FLOPPY DICK

- hehehehehegegege jealousy my beloved how wonderful you look upon Yoryak Phadetsuk 🥰🥰

- I don't know whether to be endeared about how excited Yak is to eat Dee's cooking... or fucking terrified because Yak is about to eat Dee's cooking

- the food is edible???

- COSTUME FASHION SHOW (although Yak being unsure about the whole thing but still trying for Dee's sake 🥺🥺🥺 count two of I'm fucking fine)

- GRANDMAMAMMAAMMAAMAMAMAMAMA QUEEN I HAVE MISSED YOU GUYS SHES BACK

- the irony of Yak being able to coordinate fights but unable to dance in rhythm 🤣🤣🤣

- wha- wait- what do- WHAT DO YOU MEAN FAKE BOYFRIENDS!!! YOU KISSED!!! ON THE LIPS!!! YOU'RE MARRIED NOW!!! WHAT NONSENSE AM I LISTENING TO

- disappear comp- ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?!?

- I'm about to commit violence... pretty sure Kao and Granmama would help me

- product placement... my goodness I forgot what you looked like 😅🤣

- nooooooooo cute product placement!! 🥹🥹🥹🥹 I'm suddenly violently thrown back to the Miscellar water scene from BBS

- THE MARRIAGE EQUALITY BILL IM GONNA FUCKING THROW UP IM SO FUCKING GWENCHANA RIGHT NOW

- "let's register for marriage" NO ONE FUCKING TOUCH ME (this show better end with Yei and Cher having rings on their fingers, that's all I'm saying)

- you've never pro- oh gods oh gods is this happening is it it?!?!?

- ITS HAPPENING IT IS FUCKING FUCKING FUCK (COUNT 3 OF IM SO FUCKING GODDAMN FINE)

- speaking very honestly and seriously though: something in me breaks in the very best way watching Oyei ask Cher to marry him because they can. This is a thing that is very real for them. And it's beautiful.

- I love you Taem but girl.... you doing me a heckin annoyance- what is with that face???

- we're faking dat- sir when you start blow drying a dude's hair with that look in your eye YOU'RE FUCKING MARRIED!

- THAT'S A WEDDING GROOM OUTFIT YOU DUMB FUCKS WHY AM I SURROUNDED BY STUPID GAYS (all except Cher and Kao... they have all the brain cells)

- oh no... oh no no no no (remembers the scene from the trailer last week with Taem and Ohm) I do not like this nope nope no

- GET YOUR FUCKING HAND OFF HER IM GOING TO STAB A TWIN

- oh gods... the need in me to tell Yak to help Taem but also Dee's heartbroken face!!!

- THE DESI IN ME REJOICES!!!! I SEE YOU MY SARI WEARING BESTIE!!!!

- fuck no fuck no fuck no go away Ter curses upon you you flip floppy cock

- just one word- here's TWO words: fuck you

- also, Ter is an absolute asshole because Kwan is the one he's here's with and yet he goes to Dee to essentially say "oh I'll drop her for you in a heartbeat"... tell me you're an asshole without telling me you're an asshole

- Ter and Ohm sitting in a tree, both being A S S H O L E!

- GET YOUR HAND- YAK THROW HANDS NOW!!!

- fuck yeah report his fucking ass!!!!

- WHY ARE THESE ASSHOLES TOUCHING PEOPLE- where's my machete I need to chop appendages

- push him away push him away push him away for fucks sake Dee push him away

- oh thank fuck (could have shoved him harder is all I'm saying)

- THROWING HIS WORDS BACK AT HIM FUCK YEAH DEE THAT'S MY BOY

- Dee says it wasn't out of sarcasm... I don't care, I'm going to my grave with that broken look on Ter's face (honestly Dee, sweetheart, I'm so proud of you though; you know your worth)

- calling Ter pichai is perfect because Dee is finally distancing himself from this man; breaking the ties of familiarity and putting him where he belongs: in the trash as a fellow doctor

- if I had a quarter for every time I wanted to chuck my phone at a wall because a dickhead is touching one of my babies... I'd have a whole ass dollar... WHICH IS FAR TOO MANY QUARTERS!!!!

- Vivi.... remind me to erect temples for you too, my sweet desi wearing queen ♥️

- Kwan, you deserve better. The entire fucking hospital deserves better than that piece of shit quack doctor.

- wait is he.. he is... please let that be...

- FUCK YEAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

- look at my princes dancing!!! My kings!!!

- do I take extra joy in watching Ter shoved off to the side? YOU FUCKING BET I DO

- ohhhhhh sir... sir are you gonna ask him to da- oh

- SJNWHEENJDNWJSSNS FUCK YEAH I LOVE YOUS

- say it back Dee SAY IT BACK!!!!

- WHAT DO YOU MEAN END CREDIT?!?

- HPV info my beloved 🥰🥰♥️

- you're going all out to win him over: WHAT THE FUCK WAS HAPPENING BEFORE?!

- oh no oh no no no no that makes me scared...

Well, this episode had me wanting to bang my head into a wall thanks to two assholes but on the whole, a lovely episode!!! I cannot wait to see how next week fucks me up!

[tanoraqui]

Dungeon Meshi Liveblog: Marcille Takes Charge!

You know what, this is actually a very fair answer to my earlier question of "why couldn't the ancients just kill the demon?" Points to you again, Ms. Kui.

Truly I can't wait to see, like, every single Mithrun fight scene in the anime. The whole First Floor Incident is presumably going to be Episode 1 of Season 2, and I'm sooo excited.

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At first, I thought the Lion was being snarky here, but in retrospect, knowing its whole story and nature, I think it genuinely is just fond of all its former dungeon lords. What wonderful meals they gave it!

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That said, the Lion DOES have enough personality to Judge Marcille for her aesthetic choices; and I think that's beautiful :) <3

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MARCILLE, NO! You're showing how corrupted you've become/how you were never suited to this role in the first place by acting directly contrary to explicitly stated themes of the story!

There is, however, something very satisfyingly country-ruling foreshadowy about Laios (and Kabru!) looking down at all of this spread out, though.

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It IS painful watching Kabru try desperately to play both sides, keeping Laios safe from the Canaries without letting him go side with Marcille. Bud, I'm sorry but you HAVE lost control of this situation. And Laios is smart enough to have put everything together about what happened while he was unconscious, even when you deliberately didn't tell him.

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[whispering sternly to myself] It's not fealty. It's NOT fealty. It's the start of a beautiful best-friendship which just so happens to include 1 guy looking at another guy and deciding that yeah, he has good potential to fill the king-shaped hole that guy #1 has been searching to fill - but just, like, on principle; genuinely NOT for any personal emotional need. The best-friendship is a completely unrelated emotional need. The ONLY fealting in this story is, so far as I can tell, between Shuro and his ninja squad, because they're from a completely different culture and, tbh, genre of anime.

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But Laios, conversation is his means and mode! His sword and shield! If he can't talk it out, how is he possibly going to convince you to do anything, including save the world and be his friend?!

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God I love this. It's this perfect combination of "You are my polar opposite; you love the thing (monsters) that I'm terrified of, and I want to know how so I can do that, too, because I'm so tired of terror" and "You love a thing (monsters), understanding it to the point of being very good at killing it, the same way I love a different thing (people); we are the same and I just want you to recognize that like I do so we can happily vibrate on the same frequency forever."

It's very tragic-funny that Kabru genuinely try to introduce himself to Laios in a normal way, before resorting to taking his entire party to stalk him to dangerous levels of the dungeon and eating monsters. It's not his fault that Laios is completely immune to small talk.

I DO think that every pair (or throuple, etc) of narrative foils in every piece of media ever should at least try making out. At a certain point of narrative foiling, you might as well, you know?

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Note: Pattadol says she's "reporting" to Flamela, indicating that she's subordinate within the greater Canary structure even though she's 2nd in command of the most superior hunting party.

Also, it seems that the Canaries we know, the senior-most party, are genuinely the badassest of the badass and meant primarily for advanced dungeons including confronting dungeon lords and the demon directly. Tier-3 groups have less experienced guards, maybe criminals as well, and go on more scouting-type missions with no serious combat expected.

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She's not wrong, she's just a jerk about it!

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I get where the elves are coming from, I do. It's impossible to tell people people that there's a demon underground who'll grant their every wish while also communicating the dangers of this sufficiently that nobody goes searching for it. Even we the reader, don't entirely understand how bad it can get, how fast, until we watch Marcille do All Of That under the demon's active influence.

HOWEVER, it IS human nature to respond to this sort of thing with "well I/my friend won't go insane." There's gotta be a compromise wherein at SOME POINT far down the 'everything is going wrong in this dungeon' line, they just fucking tell people. They at least TRY. Otherwise they're just rolling their eyes at the short-lived races dangerous ignorance while actively refusing to reduce that ignorance.

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Again: Shuro is living in a slightly different, much cooler genre of manga than the rest of us. Also:

TEAM TOUDEN LET'S GOOO!!

The best part of this is that earlier, when our heroes were trying to figure out who might help them eat Falin's dragon half, I was like, 'hmm...they liked you, sure, but eating dragons is pretty weird...'

But now we are outright ALLYING AGAINST THE ELVES!

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Lmao. Classic adventuring party members, baffling NPCs as a team.

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oh this is cruel. this isn't fair.

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boys, focus.

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the comedic timing...

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lookit, that 30 seconds of desperate verbal flailing actually did help! Kinda!

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yeah, I DO really like that everyone looks to Chilchuck for his opinion on Marcille's 'make everyone live to 10,000' plan, as the guy with the shortest present lifespan and also the most age-wise of all of them.

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I Do Not Like This Visual. I Do Not Like the disproportionately large lion with human arms and hands shoving himself out of this book.

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Not to be pedantic, but I think if you're trying to entice a team of people into doing your will by calling out each of their individual strengths, I think you shouldn't make 2 of them as repetitive as "curiosity" and "inquisitive mind." That's not really what Senshi is bringing to the table anyway - I'd say "care" or maybe "sense of balance." Also, sorry Izutsumi but how tf is her "wildness" contributing to this mission?

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oh, Marcille, no...

[lovezbrownies]

Death after Love. ( Yan!Military Chief x GN!Reader)

Masterlist

Synopsis: The murder of a woman's spouse kills her sanity.

Military Chief Gen Ludenhart x GN!Reader

Warnings: Crazy Gen, Darling dies, torture.

Oh, how her darling has changed since Gen had taken them in. They’re more obedient now, won’t try to escape as much, don’t refuse her, stick by her side in public, and never speak to another soul other than her. You’ve been so good for her, following every rule she has spoken about, and even the rules left unspoken.

So why is she here with you again? In the basement where she used to punish you for your misdeeds. Gen can’t seem to recall, you haven’t done a thing when she picked you up and threw you onto the basement floor, you looked so confused. So petrified. Gen doesn’t remember a thing, she knows she returned home furious. She wanted to let out her anger, she knew that. But at her darling? Was she even thinking clearly?

Well, obviously not. Gen can’t stop panting, it felt like she used all her strength to do something just now. What was it? Is it the unidentified body lying in front of her? Is that what she fought? Did the body even fight back? No… It was just her pulling the punches. Punches? No, she didn’t punch, she bludgeoned, she cut, she broke the body.

The daze finally clears, and Gen knows this body. It’s you.

A scream echoes out, was that from her? Or maybe a maid unfortunate enough to see the absolute wreck that is your body. Blood is covering the floor, your face the only thing recognizable in this mess of gore.

No. You couldn’t be dead, she wouldn’t kill you. You’re too resilient for death, you have to be okay right?

Gen kneels down next to your lifeless body, “Honey. Honey. Honey. This isn’t funny, Honey. Get up or I-I’ll hurt you again. Please, please don’t leave me… Don’t tell me I did this, please get up, please tell me I didn’t do this, please say I love you.” Tears flow out of Gen’s sorrowful eyes, unable to comprehend the loss of her beautiful spouse. How can she be ungrateful for what she has- or one could say had. Gen never knew how to appreciate the good things in life, so maybe she deserved this. Gen deserved being the executor of her lover, because the universe knew, the gods knew, that the only way to calm her down is to bring down the most painful fate possible.

“...Please, w-we have so much a-ahead of us… Please baby, please… I p-promise I w-won’t hurt you again… Just please please come back to me, c-come back to your loving wife, I beg you…” The Ludenhart manor had become a shell of its former self, lacking the love and joy of Gen Ludenhart it dissipated into mold and dust.

[sarayu-sunrays]

what do you guys see when you imagine the word poetry in your head? reblog and add, i'll go first and do my best to explain:

i see a wide open, empty room (like a ballroom, grand and airy) filled with golden light and beautiful plants. in this room i can almost taste the heady aroma of what elegance seems like to me. in the centre is a woman, with dark brown hair and a golden gown, turned so i can almost see the tip of her nose. she has her arms outspread as if about to go into a curtsey, and i can nearly see a breeze flutter through, swishing her dress gently.

[petricorah]

scenes i loved from Real Enough to Get Me Through by @marriedzukka <333 [ids in alt]

[heartorbit]

a mob of emus for an artstyle game on twt! ^_^

[ozlices]

oz vessalius.

[devotedlystrangewizard]

the school arc to me is so good because it drags ciel out of his position as a powerful figure and literally places him in the shoes of the person he could have been. the circus arc ALSO drags him out of his position as big bad queens watch dog/head of the phantomhive estate but the school arc feels like a mockery of a future that never was. this is what he could have been had his parents not died. and even then its NOT because he will never be that kid.

he never was.

[immamapletreekid]

ok movie thoughts time

[chat-dank]

If you’re not into Angbang for the "In a world where I hate everyone and everything, against all odds, I found acceptance / love in you” dynamic and the ancient, poetic intimacy of order and chaos, of creation and destruction, I’m not really sure what you’re here for.

[bmpmp3]

the epic highs and lows of trying to read an ongoing shounen manga

[anotherpapercut]

Ayo, as someone whose only hallucinogenic experiences have been in the following, what are your thoughts on/have you tried DMT and/or salvia (divinorum)? I tried both in the one night a couple of years ago and it was an incredibly enjoyable experience but I've not tried other hallucinogens, I wouldn't mind knowing how you compare it to other hallucinogens! (if you can)

I've not tried salvia but I have tried dmt a couple times and funnily enough I fucking HATED it. like I've tried maybe 2.5 times and I remember the whole time (for context for those who don't know, dmt lasts like 15 minutes max lmao) being like "holy shit I need this to be over NOW holy fuck I'm gonna DIE" bc for me it honestly felt like insanely intense sensory overload. like everything was loud and bright and assaulting my brain. a poster of some kittens saved my fucking life one of the times ajhdkabdjd I stared at them and they gently lifted me back to reality

so I think if you started with DMT and salvia ur fuckin GOOD bro like ur ready lol. acid is pretty similar feeling to DMT except imo a lot less intense, and it lasts all fucking day so you can do a lot of Fun Activities. shrooms are pretty similar, usually a lot easier to tailor ur dose ime and they last like 5-7ish hrs usually as opposed to the like 8-15 you get with acid. so w those two I think if you liked DMT and salvia you'll probably like them, bc they're very similar just less intense and longer acting! from what I've experienced the visuals and stuff are slightly different on all of these but it's the same kind of experience. so most people I know have 1 favorite that for whatever reason meshes best w their brain (I'm an acid guy, most people I know find shrooms to be gentler tho!)

MDMA is probably my personal favorite in the psychedelic class because that shit is straight happiness to your brain. music is great on most drugs but on molly oh my god. like. you need to dance bc all of your cells are dancing. and you LOVE. just so much LOVE. I recommend doing a candy flip (acid and molly) or a hippie flip (shrooms and molly) bc the effects play off each other and make for an extremely pleasant experience (provided you're being safe of course!!!!). I would NOT do this ur first time for clarification, because you always wanna see how you do on stuff alone first but if you end up liking them keep it in the back of ur mind for someday when ur favorite band releases a new album or smth :)

[darabeatha]

Absolutely feral that after getting kicked from heaven and falling down for 9 whole days (and then staying burning in agony in a pit of fire down in hell for another 9 days) s.atan and his army of millions of fallen angels just crawl from the shores of hell, decide to make a hugeass palace for themselves and then discuss what the heck are they going to do now, only to come to the conclusion that the way to hurt god the most would be to destroy his newest creation (men) which from then on they can further take on earth and make it their new kingdom (bc during the council, one of the fallen angels argued that even if they made a new kingdom in hell, at the end of the day they are still essentially 'trapped' in a box, so would that even count as a triumph?)

[andragoras-in-vanity]

isekai is such a popular genre right now, and its taken a clear shift from 'i got isekai'd and now im a fantasy hero!' to 'i got isekai'd and now i get to live a quiet and happy life in the countryside/as a librarian/pharmacist' and obviously a lot of it is just......someone wrote this to kill time and draw boobies, but Parallel World Pharmacy was so good???? i cried so many times, and i love the shift in tone the genre has gained with stuff like that