reminiscing-wanderer

[beardedmrbean]

A misleading seven second clip of President Biden could reshape Facebook's misinformation policies ahead of the 2024 election, but the platform — and the American electorate — are running out of time.

The Oversight Board, the external advisory group that Meta created to review its moderation decisions on Facebook and Instagram, issued a decision on Monday concerning a doctored video of Biden that made the rounds on social media last year.

The original video showed the president accompanying his granddaughter Natalie Biden to cast her ballot during early voting in the 2022 midterm elections. In the video, President Biden pins an “I Voted” sticker on his granddaughter and kisses her on the cheek.

A short, edited version of the video removes visual evidence of the sticker, setting the clip to a song with sexual lyrics and looping it to depict Biden inappropriately touching the young woman. The seven second clip was uploaded to Facebook in May 2023 with a caption describing Biden as a “sick pedophile.”

Meta’s Oversight Board announced that it would take on the case last October after a Facebook user reported the video and ultimately escalated the case when the platform declined to remove it.

In its decision, issued Monday, the Oversight Board states that Meta's choice to leave the video online was consistent with the platform’s rules, but calls the relevant policy "incoherent."

"As it stands, the policy makes little sense," Oversight Board Co-Chair Michael McConnell said. "It bans altered videos that show people saying things they do not say, but does not prohibit posts depicting an individual doing something they did not do. It only applies to video created through AI, but lets other fake content off the hook."

McConnell also pointed to the policy's failure to address manipulated audio, calling it "one of the most potent forms of electoral disinformation."

The Oversight Board’s decision argues that instead of focusing on how a particular piece of content was created, Meta's rules should be guided by the harms they are designed to prevent. Any changes should be implemented “urgently” in light of global elections, according to the decision.

Beyond expanding its manipulated media policy, the Oversight Board suggested that Meta add labels to altered videos flagging them as such instead of relying on content takedowns initiated by fact-checkers, a process the group criticizes as "asymmetric depending on language and market."

By labeling more content rather than taking it down, the Oversight Board believes that Meta can maximize freedom of expression, mitigate potential harm and provide more context and information for users.

In a statement to TechCrunch, a Meta spokesperson confirmed that the company is "reviewing the Oversight Board’s guidance" and will issue a public response within 60 days.

The altered video continues to circulate on X, formerly Twitter. Last month, a verified X account with 267,000 followers shared the clip with the caption “The media just pretend this isn't happening.” The video has more than 611,000 views.

The Biden video isn't the first time that the Oversight Board has ultimately told Meta to go back to the drawing board for its policies. When the group weighed in on Facebook's decision to ban former President Trump, it decried the "vague, standardless" nature of the indefinite punishment while agreeing with the choice to suspend his account. The Oversight Board has generally urged Meta to provide more detail and transparency in its policies, across cases.

As the Oversight Board noted when it accepted the Biden “cheap fake” case, Meta stood by its decision to leave the altered video online because its policy on manipulated media — misleadingly altered photos and videos — only applies when AI is used or when the subject of a video is portrayed saying something they didn't say.

The manipulated media policy, designed with deepfakes in mind, applies only to "videos that have been edited or synthesized... in ways that are not apparent to an average person, and would likely mislead an average person to believe."

Critics of Meta's content moderation process have dismissed Meta's self-designed review board as too little, far too late.

Meta may have a standardized content moderation review system in place now, but misinformation and other dangerous content move more quickly than that appeals process — and much more quickly than the world could have imagined just two general election cycles ago.

Researchers and watchdog groups are bracing for an onslaught of misleading claims and AI-generated fakes as the 2024 presidential race ramps up. But even as new technologies enable dangerous falsehoods to scale, social media companies have quietly slashed their investments in trust and safety and turned away from what once appeared to be a concerted effort to stamp out misinformation.

"The volume of misleading content is rising, and the quality of tools to create it is rapidly increasing,” McConnell said.

[teabutmakeitazure]

"As long as you're mine, alive and healthy, I don't need anything else" Nearly laughted when I read it. Boy made is priority clear. The three are what he want. But mine is the must. Alive is also needed -but in second. Healthy is even better. But mine is still the first thought before alive and healthy- I would read too much in what this could implied.

and you did right to read too much ;D the last line in the fic before the bonus scene is precisely why I've named the fic dissimulation. Childe's real desires are too twisted to act upon (bro casually licks up blood and broken skin, he is capable of way worse), so he gives himself in small doses. First, he keeps you with him. Then, he starts regulating your life, cutting your socialising off almost entirely. Next, he isolates you from the opposite gender. The only exception for now is group projects. After that, he brings you closer, being the person you talk to the most, the person you see the most. Slowly, he's taking everything over and he's impatient.

He just wants to lock the door when he leaves home, taking the only key with him and cut off all electronic communication on your end. The only thing you'll be getting is a phone with which you can only contact him so that he can send you pictures and memes and reminders to eat and stay hydrated while he's at work <3

fun fact i was gonna let him kiss reader in that scene but i thought the hand over the mouth was more threatening. it's him going "you cant do anything. you cant even deny a kiss. you will be mine and so will your body. you dont get to decide when but i might consider your feelings because im nice." also, "Well, as long as you are thinking of him, he doesn’t mind playing like he’s putting the muzzle back on. You were never the one holding the leash anyway." he is just being nice. you do not control him as much as think you do. tread carefully :)

[tearlessrain]

7 and 12 for the durge creator asks:)

eey thanks! (ask meme)

so for clarity, my durge is actually two people, they're twin brothers (or yknow, they consider themselves that, not even gonna try to figure out the exact biological fuckery behind their existence), one of whom (Ryldimar) developed a conscience after getting tadpoled and the other of whom (Veil) really didn't. They were extremely close all their lives and are basically one soul in two bodies or something similar, but forgot each other after they got tadpole'd and were both just vaguely aware that they'd Lost Something Very Important until they started respectively piecing things together. their story inevitably ends tragically but Ryldimar at least more or less survives to move on from it.

Ryldimar is the one whose playthrough I consider "canon," while Veil didn't encounter much of the main plot up to act 3 and carved his own way to Baldur's Gate, where he proceeded to kill Orin and take her Netherstone before Ryldimar got there and basically replaced her as the Bhaal boss in my own canon. How did Veil resist the Absolute without the prism? some kinda twin bond/Bhaal blood bullshit, don't worry about it.

I somehow don't have proper art refs of them yet but they are each other's dream guardians in-game so I have screenshots like this hoarded.

just. imagine that Ryldimar is wearing a bunch of scraggly bloodstained furs instead of shiny plate armor. he didn't even look that put together before the tadpole.

so that was a bit of a ramble but yeah lol.

7. Is their personal story represented in their overall design? Do they carry any mental scars or physical alterations from the shit that happened to them? It is, but not all of it is on purpose lol. I made Ryldimar first and wasn't terribly invested in the whole durge concept, I just wanted to see more of the game, so I threw together something visually appealing to me and picked drow because I'm one of those people. then I decided to do one(1) evil run and made Veil by just mucking up Ryldimar's design a little. it was actually my friend who suggested that they could be twins and I immediately got super attached to the concept (because who doesn't love a good Evil Twin trope) and now here we are, and I've since adjusted their designs a little accordingly (they've both got the red swirl tattoo, but Veil's is canonically on the opposite side and it's not a tattoo so much as a remnant of whatever process split them into two people). Ryldimar is the one who ended up in Kressa Bonedaughter's custody for a while, so he's got a fair amount of scarring from her various vivisection attempts. It's also the reason he experienced such a stark personality change in a way Veil didn't; Kressa's poking around in his brain (mostly in an attempt to make him slightly more docile so he'd stop trying to strangle her with his own intestines) had unforeseen long-term consequences. Veil's face scarring is intentional and decorative, and it predates the tadpole. They both had some artistic inclination though they uh, kept it a lot more reined in than Orin obviously. Veil always leaned more toward visual arts and Ryldimar preferred music (mostly as justification for the single level in Bard I gave him).

Veil also does absolutely have brain damage, but aside from the memory loss it mostly just fucked up his emotional regulation a bit. Though ironically, he doesn't remember his name (Veil is something he picked for himself post-tadpole) while Ryldimar does remember his.

12. OC Art/Stories or shipping content? What do you enjoy the most? What's ur little hidden passion? Okay so arguably a bit of both; the two of them have a whole story arc intertwined with @elaphaemourra's tiefling oc Dragonfly (same person who is the inspiration between Veil and Ryldimar in the first place). I really love throwing my ocs at other peoples' ocs and the whole conversation started as just throwing whump ideas around by letting Veil get his hands on Dragonfly. that evolved into "Dragonfly is the hostage in Ryldimar's storyline, he was originally captured by Orin but once Veil killed her he didn't need a hostage anymore, so he just kept him for fun."

It was already canon that Ryldimar ends up killing Veil and rejecting Bhaal, now he just. also gets a very traumatized tiefling out of it and by this point we've written walls of text about these two recovering and helping each other heal from the insane shit they've both been through.

also they fuck. so much. they're the absolute epitome of "that which doesn't kill me gives me kinks that are difficult to explain."

[tanoraqui]

I’m gonna pretend someone asked me #3 of this ask meme for Celechwes, bc no one ever did but I still love the answer.

3. What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? (Gets you thinking about socio-economic class, values, and how they spend their leisure time)

I am truly not sure that Celechwes understands money. Like, the basic concept of “we are pretending this shell/gem/fancy leaf has value for the sake of more convenient trade deals (rather than simple barter of objects”...sure. It’s not really her thing, but the Sindar did develop the concept of money at some point during the Years of the Trees. Mostly it’s only used for large trade deals, but Celechwes has ridden with enough long-range traders that she understands.

Use of money in Beleriand kicks into much higher gear when the Noldor arrive. Partly because they’re weirdos with an elaborate gem-based monetary system which they made up for fun in peacetime; partly because money becomes much more useful when people don’t trust each other enough to say, “no problem, you can just give me some fruit next year”; partly because of the Great Nargothrond-Thargelion Trade War. Celechwes starts making an effort to carry the equivalent of an emergency $20 in her pocket at all times, maybe in a couple different currencies (Noldorin gems, Falathrin shells, Sindarin leaves?). She uses it, like, 1 time, to buy a loaf of bread form a dwarf.

Economics are important to Noldorin politics, but they are just not Celechwes’s specialty. They’re so blatantly imaginary that even when she tries to understand, she can’t keep it in her head. She understands the significance of Caranthir paying half his taxes to Fingolfin and half to Maedhros, but I’m not sure she knows the difference between gross and net income. 

Celechwes has only ever paid taxes on the technicality that royal couriers get some sort of regular allowance, on top of free meals, board and relay horses at courier stations and some amount of regulation clothes, arms and armor; and you can choose to have the royal tithe automatically taken out of it. The rest of it, she officially has in some sort of bank in Barad Eithel, but she regularly forgets it exists because it’s just written down in a ledger. 

Other than free perks from her job, she forages, and trades foraged odds and ends for other odds and ends. When she’s visiting her mother, she inevitably gets roped into fishing, and trading the excess at the town market.

She considered buying her own, really nice, fast horse once, in like the late 100s? But Noldor tend toward gift-giving as a love language, so she mentioned it semi-idly and Fingon was immediately like, “I can give you a horse! Do you want a foal, a yearling or something older? This is a normal level of gift to give a friend, by the way. Do you want to go tot he stables right now?”

At some point in Aman, Celechwes pokes her head into Lalwen’s study and is like, “Hey, do I have money here, too? I know some people who want to build a bridge in the Ered Ely but they need a few more tourmalines worth of materials.”

“Sure,” says Lalwen, flipping idly through a magazine. “I don’t know about Nolo’s side, but I’d expect you have a legal right to anything in Formenos that Nerdanel doesn’t want. Ask Aradeth; I’m sure she can give you a valuation.”

Celechwes a couple days later, poking her head into the office of her sister-in-law Aradeth, now Professor of Mathematics at Tirion University, once Lady of Thargelion: “Hey, Lalwen said I should ask you how much the treasure left in Formenos is worth? I’m thinking about helping some people build a bridge - ”

Aradeth, slamming down the paper she was reading: “Don’t you dare.”

Celechwes: “What? Why not?”

Aradeth: “All the contents of fortress at Formenos have been tacitly un-acknowledged by all relevant and non-relevant parties since the departure of Fëanor and all his people. If you introduce any of it into public circulation, they will be able to tax all of it, and I will be eaten by orcs again before I let the House of Arafinwë take-”

Aradeth remembered the place and time, and said, “...any of it for a reasonable royal tithe for public works...”

Celechwes asked gently, “You alright, there?”

Aradeth dragged her hands slowly down her face, and rested her elbows on her desk.

“Yes. Just...please don’t. Not Formenos. It’s...”

“It’s the last place that was home,” said Celechwes - who had, after all, made a 400-year career of dissecting the foibles of the Noldor in general and the extended House of Finwë in particular, and who was still somewhat appallingly good at it.

Aradeth nodded gratefully.

“There are other assets lying around,” she said, collecting herself. “I compiled a list at some point - and you do know that you have a greater right to Fingon’s old junk than his parents do, if they never got rid of it? Honestly, you’d be doing him a favor if you sold some - he never met a gratuitously golden piece of jewelry which he didn’t love.”

[threenorth]

There's many things I'd want to write,

It's 930pm I don't think I can last till midnight, at around 7am mst, I've taken my pills for sleepy sleep.

But...

Medical, mental health,.. Allergies coming down, and no adhd meds, everything is up in the air.

I see my pychtrist next week, hopefully I can try go back on my adhd meds as it hasn't made a difference to my heart rate being off them, but then my axenity meds might be next, but we're see what who says what, and or if we gonna try an anti depressant.

Oh and my CBT mood journal is starting but it's more just thoughts at the moment to try reckonise some cds? I see my psychologist wends.

And your last nice message was a nice stab in the heart on top of everything else, I'm currently trying to get through having no executive function and no emotional regulation kind of... Right now.

Found this meme and tried not to laugh

So if you want some advice from me, try get those forearm crunches from amazon, there's a few intersting ones made of carbon fiber might be worth it... Back to your video...

It's nice to feel something but I'm not sure what emotion it was, maybe it was angry, maybe it was sadness Maybe it was all three, I really hope as my breathing improves, I assume soon so does my feelings, I don't know exactly what's going on and I'm not really enjoying it.. Especially it's hell on a good day...

I'm due to see a cardiologist, as my doc is still a little worried that walking causes my heart rate to be still quite high, at 120, everyday feels like I ran a marathon as I've hinted at above but then expanded futher details, mom thinks it's an anti axeirty med side effect, doc doesn't know but thinks it could be the constant axeity from high ige. I don't know... It's all a fun game life at the moment...

Still waiting for the asmtha insutie as my last sickness I got given steroids and they have to wait till they are out of my system before measuring my lung capacity and a muckus test.

A breathing specialist in December...

And come February Maybe a trip to Wellington to see the marvel props....but with the cost of living begging to crunch...

(not me or my post) as there's chicken.

I usually spend $200 and that's a week without now gluten free stuff, that has to be Rye and corn free...

But I'm about 2k in the hole, at least I'm on a on a low rate credit card, I also was hoping soon I'll have a bump I gotta try pay down my 16k Intrest free student loan... Or maybe get a six figures and say pay it off before the with 6 month Intrest free overseas period... We're see but at the moment, I miss you like the dopamine of adhd meds, I miss you like my coffee I have to use to get me though the day... As most of my income is going out to my MBA. I'd really like to get that done soon and say fuck off to work... As and About 1k for my phone Intrest free at least it's a good phone should last me another 5 years or so as it's 5g capable.

Oh and I ain't gyming so that extra $100 I'm putting towards my phone so in 10 weeks that's one less bill.... It's about 32 weeks (student loan at 16k, 200 automatically is removed from my pay to pay it, where if I pay an extra 500) that's no enjoyment or invesments hopefully my last one pays off I found two cards worth about $15 us each that's about 25 nzd at the moment, but I'm working on scanning them in but sorting and scanning takes time, as I need some money for some investments and a new computer monitor, and what I assume it's a trip to the mountains when my body can breathe better... At this rate cross your fingers for northen summer but I don't know yet what's happening but I thought I saw you said your coming down here soon enough, that would be fun, I just don't know about soupy, oh speaking of soupy, allergist for injections, another 750 that's gonna have to come out of thin air, I can handle cats without antihistamines but wheat... That's something... , even if it doesn't make me fat Ramona.

I'll try calling you after my last meeting at 330pm, but 930am is my first but I wouldn't know how to swing into telling mom that messaged and decided to call out of the blue in the morning,and if I did how I mute you from the meetings then some how I focus on my presentation as I'm using alot of mental capacity to try do work currently... And it's annoying as hell... Draining mentally... Physically and emotionally.

I haven't even cleaned my room yet because everything takes effort I don't have...

Ehhhh... Welcome to the hot mess I'm your host, some how not dead yet, meee.

I hope you saw the rare ring eclipse... Sounded fun we didn't see anything this side of the world.

Well, I'm off to sleep.

Maybe you'll text me back your Sunday schedule seeing it's your day off your probably heading into get groceries.

I get paid Tuesday might try ask mom when we can get to Costco I need some more frozen vegetables and maybe frozen strawberry for my smoothies,at least it's spring so strawberrys and watermellons are coming in, one fruit I enjoy..

I really gotta open up my flavours but everything either hates me, or I hate it with sensory issues... God living my life is a fun roller-coaster...

Anyway,

Looking forward to the new Scott Pilgram series coming out soon...

I hope you didn't see cam on mafs,(it's on lifetime?and FYI? We're getting off the internet some how... I might have to dip off social media if he says my name as I expect a bunch of crazies to come out. Let's say I'm looking forward to the next episode to here what shit my cousin makes up at his ceremony, so if you want in the in thing for us right now, that's gonna give me laughs for months and months.

[shachiruka]

one of my pet peeves is when people misspell character's names in fic (not one typo bc that's just something that can happen to everyone. i mean like consistently misspelling it through the whole text and even the tags) but it can be a little funny if the misspelled version now has another meaning

which brings me to the fact that i've been seeing some Ocean's fics lately where people spelled 'Reuben' as 'Rueben' which is like. German for 'turnips' and it always makes me laugh haha

[glowinggator]

Cuddles - All Turtles

Request: Hi I really like you writes! keep up the good work, I was wondering if you could do a rottmnt cuddle Imagines? If that's fine?

Pairing: All Turtles! (Non-Poly) 

Content: Fluffy as FUCK. Brush your teeth after you read this, cause it’s sweet as hell. 

Raphael: 

He loves to cuddle! But...he’s nervous. He doesn’t want to prick you with one of his spikes, or...worse. With his brothers, it’s different! They’ve got hard shells and plastrons, but you’re so... squishy! What if he hurts you? 

He gets so happy about casual touch. Putting you on his shoulders? Throwing his arm around your shoulders? Affectionate hair ruffle? He’s the physical embodiment of :) 

If you want full cuddles, though, you’re gonna have to be the one to initiate it the first few times. He’s just too nervous, otherwise. 

Rest your head on his plastron when you’re watching a movie and he’ll melt. 

Seeing how your arms maneuver around his spikes to embrace him, how gingerly you hold him...Maybe it’s possible. Maybe you two can cuddle without getting any boo boos.

He can’t really lay on his back because of his spikes. He’ll either get stuck that way when his spikes inevitably get embedded into the material, or he’ll shred up whatever he’s laying on.

(He’s banned from the beanbag chairs.)

He wants to be the little spoon so bad, but it’s physically impossible. He’s forever bound to big spoon duty. He’s okay with that, though. 

(One time you showed up wrapped in mattress foam and bubble wrap to try and be the big spoon. It's a very fond memory, even if you were padded too stiffly to actually hold him.) 

He likes to rest his head in your lap. Run your nails along his head or shell and he’ll be asleep in no time.

He won’t lay on your stomach or chest though. He really wants to, but he’s afraid he’ll crush you. There’s no debate with that topic, unfortunately. 

He’s such a good big spoon!! He’s so strong, and he cradles you like you’re the entire world. Because you are! 

He likes to rest one hand on your stomach and tangle his other hand with yours. It’s so cool to look down and see how his spikes cradle you. Almost as though you were a treasure encased in barbed wire, protected from the outside world. 

You always feel so safe when you cuddle. I mean, it’s hard not to when you’re cocooned in 1000lbs of muscle and spikes!

His hold is firm, but noticeably gentle. 

He runs pretty warm, compared to the rest of the turtles. Great in the winter time, not so great in the summer.  

He traces little doodles on the back of your hand. You can never tell what they are, though. And he won’t tell you what they are, if you ask.  

(They’re dogs.) 

He’s not coldblooded, due to the way he was mutated. As such, he doesn’t really have any issues regulating his body temperature. He does find himself seeking out heat sources, however! Donnie calls it a vestigial response. Raph absolutely does not care about no scientific names or explanations: he just knows that he likes to sit under the heat lamp in the morning.

Prepare to be his next heat lamp. 

If you come over in the mornings, prepare to be greeted with a very sleepy Raph the instant your feet hit the lair concrete.

He’s never on his phone when you cuddle.

He is a talker, though. He doesn’t quite whisper, but he definitely invokes the gentle voice. 

He falls asleep very quickly if he doesn’t keep himself talking. Your presence is just so calming to him, he can’t help it! 

He’s a very deep breather, and it’s really calming to listen to!

Unfortunately, he starts to snore about 15 minutes after he falls asleep. And he’s loud. 

You’ll get used to it, eventually. 

Donatello

He doesn’t sleep consistently, so full cuddle sessions are far and few between.

He read that fake rumor that Albert Einstein only slept for five hours a year: while it’s since been debunked, it’s stuck with him. He started training himself when he was little to power nap instead, and now it’s hard for him to get out of the habit.  

But..you’re a good motivator.

He’s a little nervous around the concept of cuddling, at first. He’s very touch-starved, and once you warm him up to the idea, it’ll be hard to pull him off you! But he’s incredibly nervous about it at first.

It’s...intimate, you know? He’s vulnerable, and that freaks him out.

His shell is super sensitive. Partially because it’s soft, but wearing his battle shell all the time has removed a lot of stimuli that would have made it less sensitive.

He reflexively rolls his shoulders when you run your hands along his exposed shell. At least, for the first few times. If you do it enough, it’ll quickly become a way for him to relax.

Likes to pull you to his chest and hold you like that. He usually has your head under his chin so he can scroll through his phone while you cuddle. He doesn’t move his arms much though, so it’s okay.

(He also likes it when you’re facing him so he can steal glances at you once you fall asleep. He thinks you’re even prettier when you’re completely relaxed.)

You’ll rarely see it for yourself, but his eyes get all soft while you’re cuddling together. The quietest, calmest smile graces his features when you’re in his arms.

However, you do notice how all the tension fades from his body, and how his breathing seems to slow down.

He’ll run his free hand along your back every now and then, pressing a quiet kiss to the top of your head.

He runs fairly cold, which is awesome in the summertime. He always lets you borrow his hoodies when you cuddle. If you ask nicely, he’ll let you keep ‘em, just so long as he has one or two in the closet.

His bed has super soft blankets, and they’re so nice to curl up in. You’ll probably stay there for a little while after he gets up, honestly.

He’s not a talker, surprisingly. Every now and then he’ll pull his arm back to show you some meme on his phone, but that’s about it. He’ll listen to you though! He actually really likes it when you mutter about whatever's on your mind while you cuddle.

King of “Uh huh,” “Wow,” “Mmhm,” and “Damn that’s crazy.”

He really is listening, though. He just likes to tease you a little bit.

His grip is either iron-tight or loose as hell.

On bad days he’ll curl up as the little spoon, and not even the gods could convince him to let go of you.

It takes him a while to warm up to the idea of being a little spoon. Both because his shell is hyper-sensitive, but it also kind of erodes that “bad boy” persona he’s got going on.

Once he’s more comfortable with it, he’s about 50/50 on it. He’s more likely to indulge himself on bad days, but it honestly just depends on his mood.

If you pull him away from work, you can bet that he’ll pull you to his chest while he’s sitting on the bed. He’ll lean forward to rest his chin on your shoulder as he explains his latest breakthrough. He shakes a little bit when he’s excited, and you can feel it as he holds you.  

He panics a little bit when he’s on his back, but he really likes it when you lay on his plastron, so...Chair cuddles!

He likes to have you in his lap while he works.

He also likes to kick his legs up onto your lap when watching TV. If you guys have the couch to yourselves, he’ll also lay all the way on your lap. If anyone sees you guys, or if anyone comments on it he’ll just hit ‘em with a very snarky quip.

“Okay, and? At least I actually have a partner :)”

You don’t know how he said “:)” outloud.

Leonardo 

He thinks he’s so smooth, but honestly? He’s such a dork.

He’s huge on touch. But cuddling? It’s a whole ‘nother ball game. He loves it a lot, but...he’s so vulnerable! It’s so intimate to him. He’s not adverse to it in the slightest; in fact, it’s the exact opposite! He’s super excited when the topic comes up.

You can tell that the idea of fully cuddling affects him more than he lets on, because he won’t stop talking when you bring up the subject for the first time. He rambles when he’s nervous.

(He talks with his hands a lot, and it’s really cute how he rambles and rubs the back of his neck.)

He’s actually a great cuddler, though.

Big spoon? Hell yeah. Little spoon? Awesome. Horrific entanglement of limbs that would put eldritch horrors to shame? Sweet! He’s just happy to be close to you.

He can go 50/50 on having his phone with him. If he does, he’s usually either watching memes with you or playing a mobile game.

(Kind of unrelated, but he was very excited about that weird, Subway Surfers revival that happened earlier this year. It was all he played for a while, and now you have the tune lodged in your brain forever.)

He’ll talk for a little while if he doesn’t have his phone, before you settle into a comfortable silence.

He’s either ranting about something shitty that happened that day, or shitposting. There’s no inbetween.

“If I shot someone from Texas while I was on the moon, would that fall under Texas’ jurisdiction or the moon’s?”

He also likes to trace little patterns on your hands, if he has access to them that day! You can usually tell what they are. Other times, it just seems like he’s finding an excuse to hold your hand. It’s really cute.

(If you ask him what he’s drawing, he’ll say he’s reading your palms before dropping a sweet little line about how he’s in your future.)

(He does NOT know how to read palms but it’s the thought that counts <3)

Not ashamed about cuddling in public. Hell, if you’re fine with it, he’s more than happy to cuddle during movie night. In fact, it’s kind of a source of pride for him!

He looks so cocky about it that Donatello has to make a physical effort to NOT hit him.

Please run your palms over his shell, he’ll melt.

If he’s the big spoon, squeeze his biceps. He might not say it out loud, but he’s melting internally. It sticks in his head for at least a few weeks afterwards. Ego Boost 100

If you’re ticklish, prepare yourself for tickles. He strikes without a pattern, and without warning. He doesn’t always do it, though. Maybe about one in ten times. He just likes to hear you laugh :)

He’s very nice to cuddle with overall. He’s the best cuddler in the lair, hands down.

Michelangelo

Literally the only one in the lair who isn’t embarrassed when you bring up the topic.

He’s been WAITING for this moment, actually.

Doesn’t care about whether he’s the big or little spoon.

He’s super talkative when he cuddles, it’s cute. He usually likes to spend this time talking about one another’s day. He’s a great listener too!

He’s always 100% engaged in what you have to say.

He has trouble settling down outside of his normal schedule, so it’s rare that he’ll fall asleep while cuddling.

If you’re in a position that gives his arms a lot of mobility, he’ll draw on you. Not just tracing patterns, but he’ll actually bring out his markers and draw on your arms, back, or just any exposed piece of skin.

He always manages to find the prettiest colors to compliment your skin tone. You never want to wash it off, honestly.

He HAS to keep himself busy with something, or else he’ll explode. At least, that’s how he describes it. If you try and get him to lay down and fall asleep...well, he’ll try! But he’ll be squirming the whole time.

It’s best to throw on a Jupiter Jim movie if you want him to stay still.

He likes to tangle his legs with yours while you cuddle. Whether he’s taller or shorter than you, he WILL find a way.

He’s the lightest out of all the turtles, so there’s a possibility of letting him (partially) lay on you without shattering your sternum! Congratulations!

(He’s around 525 lbs. He’s only half of what Raph weighs, but he still has to be careful about how he lays on you. It’s crazy to think that you’re so small compared to him.)

His hands are so cold, and he’ll absolutely use that to his advantage. If he gets bored, or if he just wants to make you laugh, he’ll grab your waist with his cold fucking hands. Hope you’re a northerner <3

He also likes to tickle you, way more than Leo.

Don’t try and tickle him though, he HATES it. He’s absolutely the type of person to just Scream if you try.

Like I said, he gets bored really quickly. He also just likes to make you laugh.

If you’re cuddling in bed though, like right before he falls asleep? It’s so nice.

He’ll still tangle his legs with yours, but he moves so much slower. He loves to let his hands lazily roam across your form as he pulls you closer to him, savoring the comfort and heat that you bring. If he talks, it’s in drowsy whispers that only you two can hear.

[yayteaberry]

*SFW* Babysitting (Bakugou)

Rarely did he ever take a Saturday off from either training or studying, he was determined to stay better than everyone else. But, it had been raining since yesterday and he felt like he deserved a break anyways. From morning to afternoon, he enjoyed doing absolutely nothing, scrolling his social media and avoiding liking any of his friends posts on principle.

Shitty hair still won’t shut up about the selfie he liked so now nobody gets any.

His planned day of nothing is interrupted by a knock at his door, and he’s been pacified by memes to a degree where he doesn’t react violently to the intrusion.

Instead he shoves his phone into his pocket as gets up and opens the door, plain faced until he sees it’s you and that you’re holding something. Well, someone.

“Hey!”, you greet with an unusual level of enthusiasm, “I need you to do a favor for me.”

“A favor?”, he asks while he takes in the fact that you’re holding a baby, dressed in a striped onesie.

“Yeah, I’m kinda busy with stuff and I need someone to keep an eye on this little cutie for a bit!” To emphasize the importance or maybe sway him, you turn the baby around so he can see the chubby face.

“... If you’re asking me to babysit it, then no.”

You click your tongue against your teeth, rolling your eyes. “Well don’t call her by ‘it’, and I really need you to do this for me!”

He puts a hand on the door to signal that he’s about to close it, “Nah. Ask shitty hair or Deku, I think they’d love to drool over your kid.” “It’s my aunts baby!”, you say as you put your foot over the threshold, jostling the baby somewhat, which excitedly babbles as it meets his eyes, “They’re busy too, I tried asking! Believe me, you weren’t my first choice.”

“What do you mean by that?” He speaks with annoyance, opening the door fully as his competitive nature rises.

Internally you give a sigh of relief, externally you place the baby on your hip. “Bakugou, I think we both know that you’re awful with children. But you’re my last option and I have nowhere else to turn.”

“I should’ve been your first choice! I’m a fuckin’ wiz at keeping brats well behaved! Gimme!”

“Ah!”, you step out of range of his attempted grab and put out your pointer finger, “Don’t yell at the baby, don’t be aggressive with the baby, and most of all, don’t yell at the baby.”

In spite of your words you know full well he’ll do nothing of the sort, just wanting to give the appearance so he’ll be on his best behavior. He doesn’t have to know he was actually the only one you wanted to watch her.

After all his surface level bullying you can tell he’s soft on the inside, knowing he’s the least likely to give into a baby's whims while also being gentle enough to avoid making her cry.

“Yeah yeah.”, he grumbles, taking her from you when you extend her towards him, “When are you gonna collect the brat?”

You give a 50/50 gesture, shrugging, “Ah an half hour to two hours, but I’ll be back before three hours for sure! She’s been fed and changed recently but just in case,” A bag is revealed when you pull it from behind your back, taking it off by the strap and setting it inside.

“Diapers and toys, if she’s hungry there’s something for her in there too. Just, be careful about that, she’s sorta young for it.”

He nods at your words, watching her grapple at his shirt, having not once taken his eyes off her.

“Thank you!”, you chirp and give him a kiss on the cheek, knowing that he can’t do anything about it while holding her. That makes him glance up at you with some minor malice, which is reduced severely by the dusting of pink across his nose.

With that you take your leave, confident he’ll do fine.

He shuts the door and sits at the edge of his bed, cradling her in his arms. After a moment he takes a look over to the bag you left, thinking it’d probably be best to fish something out of there for her to do.

While he wasn’t experienced in caring for a baby in any capacity that felt like common sense. Plus, it’d allow him to continue wasting time on his phone.

“You,” he gently places her on the middle of the bed as he stands, “are not taking my Saturday from me with your tiny incapable hands.”

With one hand he grabs the bag off the floor and sets it on the bed beside her, opening it and digging through its contents. You were right, the thing is loaded with diapers and many different plastic objects.

Keys, babies love keys.

That toy seems the best choice, taking that and a blanket out before putting the bag on the floor nearby, holding the baby like a barrel under his arm while he flattens the blanket, then placing her on her belly.

He dangles the keys in front of her, watching as her eyes widen as she takes a horribly aimed swipe towards them. With a laugh tinged snort he lets her have them, sitting with his back against the bed and taking his phone out, resuming his leisure hobby.

A minute passes before he peeks over at her to make sure she’s still there, idly chewing on an orange key. It reminds him of something a puppy would do, up until she shoves it in way too far.

He drops his phone and yanks the keys away with concern she’ll vomit, not expecting her to look so upset over it. Briefly she contentedly waits for them to be returned, but when it becomes apparent they aren’t, she scowls.

“No,” he preemptively says, putting the keys down at his other side to keep them away, “you did something fucking stupid, so now they’re off limits. Don’t get all upset over it.”

She huffs and slams a hand down a few times, making a ‘gah’ with very demanding intent.

“I said no. Let me find something else then, calm down.”, he says as he reaches over to grab something random out of the bag, finding a plush red dinosaur. “See? Fun. Chew on this.”

He sets it down in front of her, and she immediately pushes it over, repeating herself. If nothing he gives her credit for having a strange amount of object permanence.

“I. Said. No. The fuck do you want me to do? You’re the one who can’t handle having the damn thing!” With a curt ‘no’ as a final statement, he leans over her to shove the keys back into the bag.

This turns out to be a huge mistake.

In a universally understood way, her face screws up as she starts taking in heavy breaths, which makes his eyebrows raise.

“Don’t. No crying.” his tone is as assertive as he can get it, shaking his head as if to cement it. Her tiny face turns red, sniffling once before fat tears begin to roll down her cheeks.

With no idea what to do in this situation, he starts rummaging through the bag for a solution, diapers spilling out as he digs for a similar toy if there even is one. He cringes as she really starts crying, caving and getting the keys back out, giving them to her. “See? See??”

She either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care, bawling in the way only babies do, arms giving out as she lays down.

His instincts on consoling anyone are terrible and usually not to be followed but he acts without thinking, picking her up and setting her in his lap, bouncing his leg as he pets her back, softly shushing her, ignoring the part of him that does in fact wish to yell at the baby.

Her tiny body trembles, pawing at his shirt as she rubs her tear stained face into it. Continuing to follow his instincts he lifts her up, both arms cradling her as her head rests against his shoulder. She does eventually calm, relaxing as quiet hiccuping replaces her sobs, breathing regulating.

She's effectively soothed, he on the other hand is completely shaken up.

Jesus, why did that scare him so much? He’d heard babies cry before and always was irritated by it, but this time there was something so different about it. Even now his heart is still racing, mouth dry as he stares forward into the wall with a mixture of worry and gratefulness.

Once she’s relaxed, he picks up the previously discarded dinosaur, placing it in his lap next to her. Thankfully, she seems to have forgotten about the keys, happy to latch onto the plushy.

He takes his phone back out with the intent to resume his earlier scrolling, but he can’t entirely take his eyes off her.  He’s more interested in watching her reactions than he’d ever admit.

In some ways she reminds him of you, mainly the eye color and the way her cheeks pinch up when she smiles.

You seem the motherly type to him so he assumes you’re leagues better at this than he is, but you’ve never mentioned having to babysit her before.

In fact you’ve never mentioned her before at all.

Maybe you enjoyed doing it but kept quiet so you didn’t have anyone intruding or asking to see her, babies can feel stranger danger so that made sense, it’d probably be overwhelming. She doesn’t hate him though, maybe you knew that she wouldn’t? 

Despite the panic she’s sent him through he really wouldn’t mind watching after her again. It'll probably be easier with you here, though he isn’t sure what he’d do if you were, he’d just be sitting around while you did everything.

God, she is really goddamned adorable. He smirks as he takes a second to allow himself to outwardly express something positive, watching her slap her tiny hand against the toy.

Usually the idea of having a baby is the worst one anyone can have, but right now he isn’t all that opposed to it. Not that it looks simple, more that it looks to be worth it.

He knows he’d make super cute babies, based on what he looks like and has always looked like the kid would outshine any other snot maker.

While he didn’t know what you looked like as a baby he just assumed you did too, briefly considering what a baby would look like if it came from you and him.

He’s got his mother's blonde hair despite his father's brunette coloring so that’s a dominant trait, possibly overriding your own but who can know, it’d more likely have more of your features.

Out of anything he’d want a little girl just like this one, though he’d be happy with anything as long as it's yours. Your features have always been something he likes, face as well as body, you’re built well in every aspect he tends to care about.

That, and your winning personality, even he can see that it’s a very pleasant contrast to his own. A kid with a mixture of both would be undoubtedly unstoppable, making him proud left and right.

Suddenly the thought bubble pops as reality rises to the surface.

You’re not his and he doesn’t like you anyways, this doesn’t bear so much thinking since it’ll never happen.

A heat takes to his cheeks as he tries to move on and pretend he wasn’t having a domestic fantasy involving you, mostly pretending he hadn’t had any fantasies about you.

It was something that’d creep into his mind sometimes.

Kirishima and Deku tended to have some softer traits alongside their bolder ones but it just wasn’t the same coming from either of them.

You had a certain tenacity to you, it was totally within your options to let some rich older man take care of you but you wanted more for yourself, you wanted to be a hero.

It made you strong, and you were strong because you worked for it constantly. As thick as your innocence tended to be, he was fairly confident you could knock him unconscious if it strikes you as the right choice.

He shook his head and made an effort to clear out all his emotions, directing his attention back towards the baby to ground himself. 

At some point during his daydreaming she’d knocked out cold, the dinosaur laying on the floor beside him, propped up against his chest, quietly snoozing while drooling a slight amount. Even if he wanted too he couldn’t be grossed out, it was way too cute of a sight for him to get mad.

Looking at her makes him feel tired, so he decides that taking a nap wouldn’t be a terrible idea. Careful to avoid waking her, he shifts around to get comfortable, hooking an arm around her so she doesn’t teeter backwards while he’s moving.

He thinks about whether he should turn her over and lay her on the blanket, unsure of what the proper protocol is.

His neck is gonna get super fucked up if he stays sat like this, so he very slowly gets up and lays on his bed, keeping her held to his chest until he’s flat enough to let gravity do the work. For a moment he returns to thinking about laying her on a flat surface but he lets her stay as she is, being a light sleeper means he’ll be able to deal with any problems if there are any.

-

After thanking Aizawa for the extra sparring lesson, you quickly get yourself showered and changed.

It’s been about two hours since you left her with Bakugou and you were getting increasingly worried he was reaching his limit.

Honestly you didn’t expect to be gone this long, but you were glad you gave him the estimate because it meant he’d have less reasons to be upset with you.

You prepare yourself for him to yell at you for leaving him alone with a demon for so long, even if she’s rarely a problem you do suspect he’ll be dramatic.

Still, it was a godsend that he said yes to begin with, you were going to make sure to tell him that.

When you get to his room you don’t bother with knocking, opening it to let yourself in without hesitation.

You were going to say something, but you forget the instant you lay eyes on the scene in front of you.

Practically swooning, you place a hand over your mouth to prevent making any noise, getting your phone out to document perhaps the cutest thing you’ve ever seen.

He’s laying on his bed, one arm over her and one over his eyes to block out the light, her tiny hands secured around the collar of his shirt, both of them peacefully asleep.

Not intending it to be blackmail but being aware it would probably become that, you take pictures from several different angles, wanting nothing more than to show everyone.

Though, for his own sake, you don’t actually send them anywhere near the class.

This doesn’t mean you don’t send them all to his mother, you do.

It does pain you to know you’ll have to hold off on showing people lest the information come back to him, but you do make it your phones home screen anyways. 

[buck-yyyy]

man this night sucks

apologies in advance for the rant, and i’m on my phone so i can’t add a cut :/

so i have family staying with me, right? and i’ve had to share my bedroom with my cousin. and i love her and all, but she can be a lot. and i’ve kinda just ended up getting made fun of nonstop for the past week “””as a joke”””, which, i’m not going to act like i’ve not been firing stuff back, but the difference is that all the stuff ive said has zero weight on anyone (like my cousin being a total bedhog, or how she forgot her phone charger and has to use mine, etc etc), whereas the stuff she’s saying about me is actually kind of mean, mostly about how i was as a kid (ie: she keeps saying i was a sensitive crybaby- which, while not untrue, fuckin hurts because i still have a lot of issues with emotional regulation- except now i just bottle them all up so nobody notices :/) but also stuff about how i am now, with little comments about me being weak (which, again, not untrue, still does not feel very nice to have people point out) or lazy (shitty sleep schedule).

worst part is, my family, particularly my mother, is always on her side- and whenever i say something about it, or am just a little too rude in what i fire back with, IM the one who gets told off.

it’s really starting to get on my nerves, and the constant teasing is seriously fucking with my head. i’m still trying to get past a really bad mental health episode, in which a big part of that is learning to not hate myself- but she’s slowly starting to wear down that progress. i can’t tell anyone about that part, though, because i never told anyone about how bad i was doing and now is REALLY not the time.

and really, whenever i try to point out how much of a bitch she’s being, i just get told off for being rude or she tells me that i’m exaggerating and just need to get over it, so i can’t even do anything about it.

moving on from that fiasco to a much less serious problem, SENDING MY FRIEND AN AO3 LINK INSTEAD OF THE MEME I INTENDED TO SEND. i have an excuse ready for when he wakes up but i KNOW he won’t believe me, so i’m totally screwed there. i don’t even want to think about it.

and finally, the cherry on top for the shithole of a night, a problem caused by my sleep schedule AND my cousin. my sleep schedule sucks. but because my cousin has to share a room with me, i have either start to adjust my sleep or go somewhere else at night while she sleeps so that i don’t disturb her. which, whatever, not a big deal, i chose the latter (even though she was super rude and essentially drove me out of my room even though i told her that i just needed a couple minutes to finish something. whatever.) so i spent my night in the living room, minding my own business, chilling on tumblr and ao3. lovely night.

anyways, it’s about 3:00 am when i finally decide to go to bed. i go get ready for bed, i walk in my room, being completely silent, i change into pajamas, walk up to my bed intending to go to sleep, and she’s taking up the whole damn thing. fuck.

whatever. it’s not her fault. i can deal. i grab my pillow and go to the guest bedroom- ope, can’t sleep there, that room is being used. there’s no other place for me to sleep.

so now i’m sitting on the couch with my pillow and blanket at 3:30 in the morning, about to try and go to sleep, i feel like shit, AND i’m gonna get woken up hella early in the morning because everyone else in this whole damn house is so goddamn loud and refuses to try and be quiet when i’m sleeping because of the time that it is- despite the fact that i put so much effort into being silent so that i don’t wake everyone up.

if, for whatever reason, you’ve read this far, i don’t need advice or anything- i just needed a place to put my thoughts, since i have to just swallow them down in real life. :/

this is not a girlboss moment for me.

[kit-kat-astrophe]

💫mutuals birthday appreciation💫

i tell myself that this is when i started my blog so let's pretend that this is also and anniversary thing

***if i actually know you then you're not gonna be here***

@wak4tosh1 your writing is chef's kiss, mwah, mwah. i love screaming about ashnikko to you over text and when you scream back!! reading the asks from your moots that you answer is certainly... entertaining, i'll call it. you have such chaotic energy but you seem to have it all figured out. um like wtf teach me. it is very admirable that you are the "mom friend" that has to regulate everyone's water intake. i do not like that milk doesn't count.

@everythingnerdyxoxo !!!! i consider you as one of my OG mutuals. you found me through reading a gruvia fic i wrote for their special week (no i did not complete the other days) and you said you were excited to read my other works! this is a huge compliment for me so i am very sorry that i have literally not written anything gruvia related since then. HOWEVER i am always glad to see when you've tagged me for anything, and i promise i will write something that doesnt make me want to bury it in the core of the earth eventually.

@rintaroll seeing as our first interaction couldn't have been longer than a month ago, we haven't talked much, but i would very much like to!! your writing is similar to a new song i've discovered in that i could spend all day appreciating it. the characters are so true to their original selves but they're not completely 2D either. and i appreciate your y/n being spicy, i'm tired of seeing uwu soft y/n everywhere so this is a welcome change!!

@tellescora we met through FT at first, and even though you don't post about it any more i still enjoy your content!! i'm just waiting for the genshin nintendo switch port so i can catch up already, because attempting to play it on my poor laptop gives me about two FPS. i am in love with your artwork, your hatching stands out to me a lot, and your colours pop but are never too distracting!! remember me when you get famous :']

@youreneighborhoodfandomfanatic you bring the variety to my dash. it's a mix of genshin memes, every iteration of the wellerman shanty there is on tiktok and i now declare you the news presenter that gives me political memes. i will bring you more headcanons like Ice Bridge Kaeya as soon as i can!! and also if i see somethinf that is even vaguely related to razor in any way i will not hesitate to submit it to you. he has a f r o g g i e h a t

@deadontheinsidebut angel!! whenever you call me your "day one" i feel so proud. my tiny fledgling is now a haikyuu writing master and i am but a tiny worm about to be eaten up by thou. i'm gonna let you in in a secret: sometimes i still go back to the shirabu matchup you made me!!! and i still get as excited as i was the first time i read it because it's still that good. seeing you grow so fast was so wonderful because it was so well deserved. now despite this i will continue to send you tsukki slander whenever it comes across my fyp. xoxo

@demiwizard7 weird thing is that we never talk, but i always know exactly when you're logged in because of the 20 notifs i get from you alone!!! i'm not complaining tho, it's like a silent nod of approval, which is very reassuring considering that i reblog whatever comes makes me laugh. i' glad to see that someone enjoys my trigger-happy reblog sprees, amd rest assured that i enjoy yours too!! i just don't always want you blow up your notifications-

@pokeprism14 we really need to talk more!!!!! i will take the time to explain juvia's character development thoughout the entire series if that is what it takes because i aint a quitter

@fairyreaper22345 you need to sleep on time at some point, ess. ignore when i am writing this. i can always rely on you to answer dms faster than, like, anyone. it's like you have them typed before i ever wrote anything. anyway: ess you are so pog. your fairy tail quotes never miss, your niceness is infectious and somehow you're more innocent than i am which doesn't check out at all. i adore asking you random things as 4am then complaining about the time that you're reading it. and you recommended pipeline punch which is now my favourite flavour so that's cool. we have the same slightly obscure interests (fountain pens, crime) which makes it all the more engaging to talk to you. ur just pog.

@anarchistasexual why are your political views so smart, i bet you know what happened to the stocks too. other than that youre very cool and so are all your friends. i thoroughly enjoy clowning around on the server and ignoring my homework. oh also you're just chill, and i like your vibe. you're one of those people who i'd hang out with just stare at my phone and show you memes

@pinkbtr you are also one of my oldest mutuals!! it's just hilarious to me that you figured out you like the guys with the daddy issues. you seem to have just accepted it joke and i live for it, frankly. i will use the new information that you like obey me very wisely and debate share my opinions with you. i appreciate you popping into my notifs every now and then.

happy birthday to me!

[des-draws]

1-A autistic hcs!

Alright it’s already past midnight here but. I’m still posting this.

Back in my 1-A pride hcs post I also mentioned my autistic hcs, and said I might elaborate on them in April. But because I am a master of procrastination, of course I left it for last minute. 

But either way, here you go; over 3k of projection and infodumping. I’m gonna leave an AO3 link in the replies if it’s easier for you to read there.

(general tw for some mentions of ableism, and specifically tw for ableism/child abuse/ende*vor in the very first bulletpoint)

Todoroki

Ende*vor absolutely refused to believe that there could be something “wrong” with the one supposed to surpass All Might, and so he ignored any and all traits Todoroki would show, punished him for the ones he couldn’t ignore, and chalked up the meltdowns he caused him to Todoroki being a brat.

As such, Todoroki spent a lot of his life masking and hiding and suppressing himself.

Thankfully, much like with everything else, after moving to the dorms he’s starting to unlearn all that internalized shit and instead accept himself for who he is- including indulging in suppressed stims, special interests and other autistic behaviours in a safe, accepting environment. 

He’s found that cold soba is apparently a samefood for him- he knew he liked it enough to eat it all the time without getting bored of it (not that he actually does, since with their hero training a balanced, diverse diet is important), but he didn’t know there was a word for that.

Monotone voice and trouble with facial expressions, you know how it goes. He actually tries to use the “correct” tone and make the “correct” expression, if only so that the people he’s supposed to protect don’t think of him as “aloof”, but he gets easily tired of going back to the masking. He cares, he cares so much, this is just not one of the ways of showing it that comes to him naturally.

Can people please stop talking in metaphors and idioms around him and expect him to know the translation to everything. Thank you.

He’s reluctantly letting himself indulge in his recently discovered special interest on a certain manga series; he’s been buying the volumes, and at some point Sero found him reading one and they started bonding over it. Now Todoroki goes to Sero when he feels like infodumping- though, he has to be careful not to spoil anything. Sero is a way behind since he doesn’t go through the volumes like someone’s chasing him. He has, however, helped Todoroki make a blog where he can infodump about it, spoilers and all. He’s quickly becoming “fandom famous”, Sero says- and even though Todoroki’s not sure what that means yet, he’s very happy to see others as into the series as he is.

Iida gives him stim and fidget toys all the time- Todoroki is reluctant to keep them as the other says, since he could buy them himself, but Iida insists. Todoroki especially likes the tangles. He’s building himself quite the collection.

He’s also invested in some high-quality sound-cancelling headphones. Long overdue, but better late than never.

Favorite stim: TBA, although clenching his fists around his thumbs is something he’s always done- even before he had a name for it, or knew why it was so comforting. 

Midoriya

His special interests are Quirks and All Might (the Hero Persona™ rather then the person)! He can infodump about different quirks and theories on how to use them and “what if x quirk exists how would that work” for hours. He’s spent entire evenings arguing on forums about which of All Might’s hero outfits was most efficient and useful for what was needed. Inko, on more than one occasion, had to lure him out of his room with the promise of a rare comic book so he would eat something.

On that same vein, he is appalled by some of his classmates’ hero costumes. He’s too polite to be that crass about it out loud, but in his brain he’s always going “what in the everloving fuck is this???? Who let a teenager go into battle naked???? Did she just go ‘oh yea give me a pair of gloves and boots and I’m set’ and they let her??? Who agreed to this?? Nothing tracking her vitals, nothing keeping her warm in fucking December????? This is just irresponsible”

So you can imagine the rants he goes into when one of them does ask him for advice on how to update their costume.

He likes visual stims a lot- you know that thing where you shut your eyes and wave a bright phone screen in front of them? He loves that

Having trouble emotionally regulating means lots of crying. Not a bad thing, just. A thing. That a lot of people don’t expect when they first meet him.

Inko has always tried her best to accommodate him, but there’s only so much to do when they’re just getting by. He’s very understanding though. She gets into making DIY stim toys for him, and as he grows up he joins in and it’s a very pleasant pastime for the two of them (to the point that he’d rather keep them as mementos of the time spent together than use them for stimming).

Favorite stim: Hand-flapping and back-and-forth rocking!! Classic and good!

Iida

No volume control we die like men (he’s trying to work on it but a lot of the time he’s louder than he realizes. His friends never fault him for it tough.)

Always loved putting his toys in a line- lines are neat! Don’t you see how tidy everything looks now? This is fun! Unfortunately, kids his age didn’t have the same opinion and just chalked it up to him being a “neat freak”.

The kind to separate his food into sections. He had to get used to eating with company in school, since no one wanted to sit with him during lunchtime before, lest they be subjected to his “bizarre eating habits”.

His family is, thankfully, very supportive and accommodating. They were a little worried when he moved into the dorms, but he reassured them that his classmates are just as accepting and understanding. And besides, he’s not the only “out” neurodivergent kid around anymore!

Has copied the language habits of his parents around Important Customers and never stopped. No one in his family talks quite as formally as he does in casual settings, but hey, better to be too formal than too informal and be considered rude, right?

Owns quite the collection of stim toys. Cubes, squishies, tangles, slime, kinetic sand- you name it, he has it! It’s not so much for himself, since he has a few favorites and sticks to them, but keeps the rest more so for anyone else that might need them.

He’s partial to the fidget pen- he likes fidget cubes too, but they��re usually a little small for his hands and harder to work with.

Doesn’t use memes quite right, but is always eager to learn where they originated from. Kaminari (always good-heartedly) never misses an opportunity to explain them to him, and gets so proud when one of Iida’s attempts lands.

He was kind of worried he’d look out of place on stage in the Cultural Festival, but with his friends reassuring him it’s alright, not only did he go out there, but had lots of fun as well!

Very routine focused. He loses half an hour of sleep and he’s already thinking about re-structuring his entire schedule.

Orange juice is a samefood. That boy need his orang juice

Special interest in the mechanics that go into hero costumes and quirk-assisting gadgets. It’s why he was so eager to accept help from Hatsume during the sports festival (he has mixed feelings about this one), and he’s sure they would work well together if only she stopped trying to make him a test subject.

It’s also something he and Midoriya can spend hours going back and forth about. Iida doesn’t usually lose track of time, but he can’t help it when such an interesting conversation is happening!

Screw “quiet hands”. In this house we wave our hands around intensely enough to almost smack someone (“but not actually smack them!! Always be aware of your surroundings!!”)

Favorite stim: Believe it or not, running! The wind resistance, the stomp of his feet, is all Very Good!!

Kirishima

He used to chew stuff a lot- first as a way to get used to his new, sharper teeth, and then because he just liked how very stimmy it is! But he’d also chew stuff that’s not really supposed to be put your mouth so his moms helped him find healthier stim alternatives, since actual chewelry were either a) not stimmy enough, b) wrong texture or c) destroyed too quickly and he’d just go back to chewing unhealthy stuff.

Since he’s grown enough to not go through chewelry at a breakneck pace, he keeps a couple at hand for when he’s studying- helps him focus! He was kinda embarrassed to bring one to his and Bakugou’s study sessions at first, but after Bakugou admitted that he’s also autistic he started keeping one on his person during them- assuring the other that he’s taking proper care of washing it and everything.

He used to bite on his hands as well- still does when he's under extreme stress (imagine summer camp/AFO showing up at Kamino levels of stress) even though he's grown out of it for the most part.

Hyper-Empathy Station. Makes him good with people (and animals) but leaves him exhausted more often than not.

“Hey don’t you get tired of sticking your hair up like that every d-” “It’s routine bro you can’t just quit it that would be chaos”

Whether he wears it up or not, his hair always seems to be a very good tactile stim, both for him and, surprisingly, Bakugou. When it’s up, the pointy spikes are very satisfying to run one’s hands over, just rough enough to slightly scratch the palm, but just light enough to not completely bring them down. When it’s down, Bakugou doesn’t miss an opportunity to touch it, which works for Kirishima too, since having people run their fingers through his hair is very relaxing to him.

He Cannot handle kinetic sand and most slimes. It either feels grainy and dry or too wet and sticky. The crunchy sound sand makes when it’s cut is like nails on a chalkboard in his head. It’s just not for him.

Gullible. Please be nice to him he just wants to believe in the good in everyone

Special interest on Crimson Riot!! I mean, come on; basing his hero persona on him, naming himself after him? Turning to interviews of his in moments of doubt and uncertainty, finding comfort in media about him? Yeah

Has a couple Comfort Sweaters™ and a single comfort plushie- a shark one, the first gift his Ma got him when she met his mom. It’s been patched and stitched up dozens of times, and barely holds itself together, which is why he never takes it out of its safe place in the closet unless he’s seriously in need for some comfort and has already exhausted all other options.

Bro, We Are Autistic . Its Ok To Stim Around Me . Im Ur Best Friend . I Love You . ... Bro, We Are Infodump ing Now . . No Dont Stop Bro .. Bro ...

Favorite stim: Bumping his hardened fists together!! Sometimes he’ll simply rub his hardened knuckles back and forth together- it’s more discreet, and while not as satisfactory, still good for emotional regulation.

Bakugou

Branded a problem child early on, Bakugou had the majority of his meltdowns called “tantrums” instead. So he decided that if everyone treats him like a brat, he might as well be one.

Even before he started losing his hearing, he had some auditory processing issues- which is why he hates hates hates when Midoriya mutters (and similarly, why he didn’t immediately turn his back to Kirishima- the guy talks loud and clear like 95% of the time. Bakugou can appreciate that, even if he won’t say it).

Face blindness is inconvenient as all hell, which is why he gives people ridiculous nicknames: connecting names to faces is difficult enough, and at the beginning he doesn’t really care to try and memorize them anyway, so he just finds a prominent characteristic to remember each of them by. 

[Insert Smart Guy Meme] “You can’t be deceived by fake politeness and sarcastic compliments if you react aggressively to everything people say to you”

Loves his routine and having everything planned. If you drag him into something out of nowhere and disrupt his schedule he will be mad at you for a week minimum (something his friends found out the hard way)

Prolonged human interaction is absolutely exhausting, more than any quirk training exercise, and he gets cranky at the speed of light when he reaches his limit. As time goes on he does find a few people (first Kirishima and then progressively the rest of the Bakusquad) that aren’t as exhausting for him to be around for longer and longer. He still needs his alone time, but now he knows that he can recharge around them as well, if he feels like having company.

Drumming is Very Good stim-wise. So is spicy food, which is why he likes it so much.

Pressure stims are The Worst for him- weighted blankets, tight vests, anything at all that might constrict him in any way? He Will react like cats do to cucumbers. The only exception is that once in a while, when he’s exhausted but can’t seem to ground himself enough to drift off, he’ll ask Kirishima to just. Lie on him, also like cats do, just until he falls asleep.

This is a No Socks Zone. These foot prisons are absolute sensory hell, and with how sweaty he gets it’s only made worse. 

How Can People Talk About Emotions While Simultaneously Looking Each Other In The Eye This Feels Disgusting I Will Blow Something Up: an autobiography

Favorite stim: Tiny explosions popping in his palms. Sure, grand light shows are fine and all but small ones, just big enough to feel through the roughed-up skin of his palms have a certain calming effect. Sucks that people immediately jump to assuming he’s threatening them when he’s just trying to cool down.

Tsuyu

Very blunt. She doesn’t mean to be rude, but sometimes it comes across like it when she’s only trying to be honest and offer advice.

Raptor hands 24/7. what an icon

Has trouble with physical contact in the sense that she’s??? not really sure how to do it??? She offers hugs and hands to hold left and right but it always feels like she’s just. doing it. Like how one would tie a loose shoelace or button up a shirt. It’s not like she hates it, but her nonchalance when someone does hug her makes people assume she’s being cold- which is not the case at all! She’s just offering comfort in a way she knows other people will understand even if it’s not really doing much for her.

Jelly is a samefood! She likes sour apple jelly the best 

Kind of a black-and-white mind. She’s working on seeing the world in shades of grey though, since she saw how her Absolute thinking can impact her friends.

Low/no empathy. She hates that to some people’s eyes that automatically makes her a bad person. Kindness is a choice, one that she doesn’t need empathy to make every day.

Favorite stim: Her near constant kero-kero-ing is very much a vocal stim, as well as echolalia!

Yaomomo

Makes her own stim toys using DIYs rather than her quirk, and is very eager to make any personalized ones for her friends! 

She also likes experimenting with what kinds of textures she can make using her quirk.

Has a semi-popular account where she uploads videos of her playing with slime and kinetic sand regularly.

Much like Iida, she adopted the more formal ways of speaking from her parents and house staff and has trouble toning it down (not that anyone faults her for it).

Very picky about who touches her. She genuinely does not want to come off as the Snobbish Rich Girl but sometimes when someone touches her with no warning or consent she feels like crawling out of her skin 

In the exact same vein, she was extremely hesitant to admit that the futons at the training camp drove her up the wall with that hellish texture. She didn’t want to be the nitpicky one and make a new one using her quirk, either. If anything good came out of the disaster that was the training camp, it was that she didn’t have to sleep on it another night, she thinks (and then feels terrible about it).

Her special interest is tea! Like, actual tea that you drink. Just look at how she lights up when she gets an opportunity to talk about it, or make some for others!! It’s also a samefood for her- she tries to be diverse, but there are a couple with juuust the right combination of smell and taste that she will always go back to.

Sometimes she won’t even drink any- just the process of making it is extremely comforting.

Favorite stim: Double-sided sequins! Tactile-visual stim combo!

Koda

Largely nonverbal. Talking to people is too stressful 99% of the time. Animals are way better listeners anyway.

No volume control we die like men part 2 (but it’s the complete opposite from Iida, in that he can never seem to raise his voice enough)

Likes his peace and quiet, and can easily go into sensory overload if one too many sounds are happening at once. He wants to invest in some headgear for his hero costume that helps him tune out distracting sounds so he can focus on matters at hand while still being able to hear and help those in need.

A plushie hoarder if I ever saw one. His room is the Ultimate Comfort Corner. 

Favorite stim: Humming to himself. Reluctant to do it in the presence of others, but increasingly comfortable around friends.

Aizawa 

Samefoods with those juice pouches he always keeps around

Permanently exhausted due to having to interact with people

Talks in a monotone and has trouble making expressions

His sleeping bag is very good pressure stim. It’s also very hard for him to replace it, because it has to be Just Right, so by the time he does find one that is Just Right, the old one is practically falling apart.

The only reason he’ll sleep in a bed is if Mic is there to share it with him. Otherwise it’s too cold and exposed and weighted blankets can only do so much.

He kinda misses the time before he got top surgery for the sole reason that binders offered a very comforting pressure stim. However, he acknowledges that it’s for the best he got it, since a lot of the time he’d bind for longer than it’s safe. He was lucky to still have the option of getting surgery.

(this has been a safe binding psa, please don’t do what he did)

He does however, tend to wear a tight, though still breathable undershirt at near all times. 

As much as he complains about Mic’s mustache, he actually likes it. He tried to kiss Mic once when he shaved it for the first time in forever and instantly went “yea no. This isn’t working. Feels wrong and bad, Put It Back™”. Didn’t kiss him again until it grew back.

Everything Happens So Much

He talks back to cats. Like, actually meows back at them. Very good echolalia, makes Mic’s day to walk into a scene like this

Favorite stim: Petting cats! The fur of different breeds offers a variety in texture and when they start purring a very good auditory stim is added to the mix! And when they sit on him and add a pressure stim? Cats are the whole package!!

That’s all (for now?) Thanks for reading!! Hope you had a nice Autism Acceptance Month!!!

[highladyluck]

First Lines Meme

I was tagged by @livlepretre (so excited, thank you!)

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!)

See if there are any patterns.

Choose your favorite opening lines.

Then tag 10 authors!

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1) "So, Creator. We meet at last." (Tea With The Creator)

2) The orange rays of the setting sun laid an intricate latticework of light and shadow across the cobbled streets of Great Arvalon. (Let the Lord of Chaos Rule)

3) Mat and Tuon watched in stunned silence as Tam and Selucia flirted openly on the village green. (Culture Shock)

4) "It just makes me so bloody angry!" Beslan ranted as he slammed his mug down on the table in the Cafe Musain, splashing his gold-braided red vest. (A Clothes Encounter)

5) They had told him 'opposites attract', but he wasn't so sure it was true. (Reversed Polarity)

6) Yet again, Rincewind was lost, hungry, and alone in a cold, damp forest. (Emotional Baggage)

7) It wasn't every day that Mat had the opportunity for a bit of a wander, and he intended to make the most of it. (Baby's First Knife)

8) Min had braced herself for the worst when she saw Fortuona staring impassively at her non-regulation (that is to say, non-Seanchan) outfit. (Heels)

9) Dear Queen of Andor, Defender of the Realm, Protector of the People, High Seat of House Trakand: I was pleased to hear about the new secretarial position in the Andoran Ter'angreal Research and Development Department from our mutual acquaintance, Matrim Cauthon. (Regarding the Open Secretarial Position in the Andoran Ter'angreal R&D Department)

10) The sun shone brightly on the bloody streets of Seandar, an irony that didn't escape Nalishi. (To Lose The Sun)

11) The village green was bathed in moonlight, and the air hummed with the sursurration of many voices. (Maybe)

12) Mat woke with a start when something soft hit his rump, on the side opposite his once-broken leg. (Untitled tumblr fic, about spotting Grey Men)

13) The Archdeacon clenched his fists and looked skyward, as if to implore the heavens, before dropping his hands to his side uselessly. (Demonologie)

14) They'd been camped at Merrilor for five days now, and this was the first time since arriving that Mat hadn't eaten his lunch on the go. (To Be A Silk Flower (Like I'm Never Gonna Die))

15) Talaan din Gelyn had been teaching the novice class on Cloud Dancing for half an hour when she noticed Bodewhin Cauthon planting herself behind a large bush in the courtyard, apparently settling in to secretly observe the class. (Fly Me To The Moon)

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I don't have enough fics for 20, but 15's a nice number. I did not expect to find that I preferred the opening lines of my oldest works, but the earliest stuff is pretty short and I definitely agonized over every individual word back then. I was also trying for either humor or atmosphere, whereas now I'm writing more for plot and character interactions.

Most of these are very focused on location, but my favorites are the ones that either try to be beautiful about it, or are quick and punchy about taking you to the action. A weird number of these mention the sky or the weather!

All of these are either on my AO3, somewhere in my tumblr, or on my FF.net account, except for To Be A Silk Flower (Like I'm Never Gonna Die) which is currently in-progress.

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I don’t have a ton of writer friends but anyone who wants to do it, can!

[ahgaseda]

two can keep a secret || chapter 05

⇥ synopsis : when your father reveals his intention to remarry, you find an unlikely confidant in Mark, your soon-to-be stepbrother, but what began as a revenge fling ironically becomes far more complicated...

⇥ warnings : this story in its entirety includes but is not limited to strong language and dialogue, recurring alcohol and drug use, and explicit sexual content, and is intended for an adult audience only!

Mark decided to distance himself from you. Yes, he loved the sex. No, he didn't like the feelings that came with it.

The pussy is just too good, he told himself on more than one occasion.

Joke was on him, because you decided to distance yourself from Mark Tuan.

Any other time you would have been thrilled not having to deal with a period. Then you thought about all the unprotected sex you'd been having and panic set in.

In exchange for swearing to be exclusive to each other, you didn’t make Mark wear condoms, which he obviously appreciated. Birth control pills were reliable, but they could only do so much when you were milking every drop out of him on the regular.

You avoided Mark. He would react negatively to a pregnancy scare and you couldn't handle that on top of everything else.

Mark noticed how you cleared the house before he woke. Classes had started again and you gave every excuse to stay at the university or with your friends. You were short in your replies to his texts, rarely even answering when he sent you his usual dose of memes that he found.

Twice he called and you sent him to voicemail. And that was unheard of.

Mark realized you were giving him the cold shoulder and it drove him insane.

It was all well and good when he pushed you away, knowing it was due to the feelings he was growing for you. But why in the hell were you avoiding him? You didn’t have feelings for him. At least he thought. Did he do something wrong? Had he hurt you?

Mark felt a hole taking up residence in his chest, eating him alive from the inside.

Usually after his last class, Mark charged out the door to reunite with his gaming computer at the speed of light, but today he lingered, knowing you would come out of your lab in ten or so minutes.

He hated ambushing you. Everything told him to appear callous and cold, but he couldn’t stand the thought of having wronged you in some way. Were you bored with him? Were you over the sex? If that were the case, you could still hang out with him. Mark missed your company.

With a shake of his head, Mark chastised himself, Stop getting attached.

You appeared around the corner, binder held between your overlapped arms and a backpack heavy with books slung over your shoulder. Mark wanted to reach out and grab the strap to carry the load for you.

At first, you didn’t see him. Not in the sea of fellow college students filling the hallway. Then, Mark stepped out and your eyes met.

"Hello,” said your future stepbrother.

A lump appeared in your throat. "Hi."

Mark tilted his head, raising a brow. "Wanna tell me what's going on?"

You never thought Mark would have a problem with your distance, but here you were on the spot, having to give him a reason for how intently you had been avoiding him. Rather than lie, you panicked and blurted, "My period is late."

Mark’s eyes widened. That was the last thing on earth he thought you would say. "Oh..."

"Yeah."

Mark swallowed. His brain overloaded with what those words meant and then promptly shut down. "What do we do?"

You gaped. "We?"

Mark grabbed your arm gently and led you around the corner with him for more privacy. In hushed tones, he said, "Obviously I'm the father."

"Duh,” you retorted.

He pressed, "Well?"

Well, what? You had no idea. It was damn well possible you were carrying his baby, but you couldn’t think about that - much less acknowledge it. So instead you rambled and gave excuses, "It could just be stress. I have a lot of classes this semester so I can graduate on time."

Mark seemed worried when he asked, "Have you been to the doctor?"

Biting your lip, you studied his face. Mark looked genuinely concerned for your well-being, which didn’t come as much of a surprise. Though he tried to hide his feelings, you knew Mark cared. It was more than evident with how he treated you and protected you every chance he got. Many things he did were borderline subconscious.

Walking down the street together, he always made sure he was between you and the road. Regardless of who was around, he always opened and closed doors for you. When that guy at the party got a little too handsy, Mark almost ripped his jaw off.

Snapping out of your reverie, you murmured under your breath. "I haven't gotten a test yet."

He groaned your name in reproach.

Putting off getting a test was stupid, you knew that and he knew that and most of the sexually active world knew that.

"I'm scared, Mark,” you finally said, voice soft and shaking.

Mark wanted nothing more to reach out and touch you, comfort you, but he resisted.

Fighting back your tears, you squeezed the binder in your arms a little tighter and continued, “I can’t be seen getting a pregnancy test. It’s a small fucking world and I have horrible luck.”

Mark glanced up at you through his disheveled brown hair and the next thing you knew, you were in the passenger seat of his darkly-tinted SUV, sitting outside a pharmacy.

Mark’s mother went to great lengths to spoil her son. Cars included. She gave him whatever he wanted - so she wouldn’t have to deal with him. Mark was well aware of that and milked it for all he could.

Mark scanned the tests, grabbing the most expensive ones, because from what his mother told him price and quality were correlated. Just to be safe, Mark grabbed another box of a different brand. Then another.

At the counter, the guy who looked barely out of high school gave the boxes a scrutinizing glance. Mark leveled his eyes at him, as if daring the kid to make a smartass comment and was tempted to buy a carton of cigarettes. For fuck’s sake, did he really knock up his soon to be stepsister?

Well, that would certainly derail the wedding.

As the kid rang up the tests, he said, “Plan B pills, dude. They’re a fucking lifesaver.”

Mark let out a scoff, knowing it was probably too late for that if your cycle was already missing in action. “How well do they work when she’s been on the pill for years and you been raw-dogging for months and the period still late?”

“Well, shit,” said the cashier, eyes wide. “The universe really wants you to go forth and multiply, I guess. Or you’re both just fertile as fuck."

Mark snorted. This random ass dude had almost gotten a laugh out of him.

You sat slouched in the passenger seat, trying to hide your face in shame despite the tinted windows. Feet propped on the dash, you chewed randomly at your fingernails, chipping the polish.

Mark’s mother had already said she wanted you as her maid of honor. How in the hell would you be able to walk down the aisle arm-in-arm with Mark at your parents’ wedding carrying her son’s baby inside you?

Mark opened the door and hopped behind the wheel, saying nothing as he dropped the bag in your lap.

You barely moved, letting it slide to the floor between your legs.

Mark noticed, turning to look at you with his hand draped on the wheel. “Talk to me,” he finally said.

You snapped, “Do you always drive around like some kind of drug dealer?”

Mark rolled his eyes, sensing you were on the verge of combustion and humor helped alleviate your fear. “You said you didn’t want to be seen, remember?”

You covered your face with both hands and choked out, “What am I gonna do?”

Mark’s heart sank that you left him out of the equation. Did you really think he would leave you on your own with a baby - his baby? Sure, kids hadn’t been on his mind even remotely in the future, but still, if you were carrying a baby, it was because the two of you had made it together. Regardless of how you felt at the moment, Mark was damn sure going to be involved in his child’s life.

“You’re gonna calm down,” he asserted, taking your hand and squeezing. “You haven’t even taken a test yet.”

You rubbed your brow were a headache had started. “Mark, birth control pills literally regulate my cycle. There’s no way I would skip a period unless…”

“You’re stressed,” Mark interjected. “Our parents are getting married and we hate that more than anything. You’re taking the max amount of credits and hate your degree because your father would never let you major in what you actually want to major in. And you’ve been actively fucking your future stepbrother.”

You groaned, “Gee, is that all?”

Mark stroked his hand over your fingers, trying desperately to provide some comfort. “Will you look at me please?”

“No,” you replied without hesitation.

He frowned. “Why not?”

Because I’ll cry, you thought bitterly. Because I will fall to pieces in your arms and I don’t know if you actually give a shit about me or if I’m just the girl you fuck. Slowly, you turned to face him, cheeks hot with tears.

Mark finally gave in. He couldn’t imagine what you were feeling; the nerves, the uncertainty. Reaching over, he rubbed his thumb through your tears.

“I really don’t know what you need to hear right now, baby,” he started tenderly. “But you are not alone in this. You understand me?”

You nodded and the faintest smile graced your lips. “Yes.”

Mark pulled away. It didn’t feel right to kiss you, all things considered, but damn it, you wished he had.

The ride home was silent, eerily so. Your heart was racing and your body trembling. The boxes on the floor beneath your feet were about to decide the rest of your life. Mark occasionally glanced at you, and though he said nothing else, he never let go of your hand.

When the car pulled into the driveway, your heart sank. There sat the familiar BMW. Mark’s mother was home.

Without a word, Mark came around to your side and opened the door. He grabbed the bag and stuffed it into his backpack, shutting the car door behind you once you had gotten out.

“Go to your bathroom. I’ll meet you there in a minute,” he whispered.

You sighed, “How is your brain still working right now?”

“I’m making myself useful,” he quipped.

You thanked the heavens that your future stepmother was busy ranting about the wedding decorations to some poor soul on the phone. She gave you a quick wave of her hand, which you returned before sprinting up the stairs to the safety of your room.

Mark was only a few minutes behind you. He opened your bathroom door, handed you the bag, and whispered, “Do you want me to wait with you?”

You peered up at him with glassy eyes. “Please.”

He nodded. “Okay, just let me know when you’re done.”

It didn't take you long. The two of you sat on the bathroom tiles side by side. The trio of sticks perched unassumingly on the counter though you stared at them as if they were judge, jury, and executioner. Mark draped an arm around your shoulders, tucking you close, and when the anticipation became too much, you rested your head on his chest and closed your eyes.

It felt like an eternity spent in that bathroom with Mark, sitting there in silence. His heartbeat was steady in your ear, though maybe a little faster than normal. You opened your eyes, wanting to apologize, but you bit your tongue.

The timer on his phone went off and Mark was quick to rise, squeezing your hand as he did. He peered at the three tests on the counter and exclaimed, “They’re negative!”

Your response was quiet. “Are you sure?”

“All of them.”

You exhaled heavily.

Mark picked you up off the floor and kissed your cheek. “See I told you. It’s stress, babe.”

You offered a brief smile and Mark chalked it up to shock. “You’re right,” was all you said.

Mark gave you one last chaste kiss and slipped out the door, making some comment about celebrating later. For a moment, you watched the door, ensuring he didn’t burst back in.

Then you turned, glaring down at the three tests. The ones you had run under the water in the sink. After a moment or two of nausea, you crouched down and opened the cabinet where three more tests were hidden. The ones actually stained with your urine.

That was when you sank helplessly to the floor before emptying your stomach into the toilet.

All three were positive.

You were pregnant.

chapter 04 ⇤ chapter 05 ⇥ chapter 06

Hey there, beautiful! If you enjoyed this, please leave a like or reblog or follow me! Or maybe buy me a coffee so I can keep writing? Or check out my masterlist here for more stories! Thanks for reading :) - Katya

This work is fictional and for entertainment purposes only, but is licensed and protected under a creative commons attribution-noncommercial-noderivatives 4.0 international license. Any instances of plagiarism will be dealt with accordingly. Do not re-post or translate without my permission.

{ copyright 2018-2020 © ahgaseda // all rights reserved }

[lejoursdor]

I feel so fucking violated.

For the last few weeks my landlord has been harassing me - passive aggressively texting me about things that could and should be taken care of after a single conversation but instead were drawn out through multiple, long, inappropriate (not to mention rude) texts at ALL hours of the day (including 3 different instances between 2-4 AM). I have had to put my phone on DND just so I could get some sleep/peace of mind at night because I have been having sleeping problems for MONTHS due to my autoimmune disease/fibromyalgia and most recently good ol’ fashion insomnia. 

I thought this morning the whole situation was finally over and that I could finally move on and focus on centering my self and nothing else today. I was unexpectedly forced to go off my depression/anxiety meds due to issues with my insurance and have been working HARD for the last month to monitor and work through the side effects that stopping that kind of medication can cause. Luckily, I had started back on birth control a month or so prior so my hormones were already in the process of getting regulated so it hasn’t been THAT bad. I only had maybe 2 days where things were scary/alarming. But otherwise it has been okay considering. A lot of bursting into tears and taking much longer to bounce back from negativity entering my life (AKA: my landlord) but I’ve been praying no sort of suicidal tendencies/ideations spring up but so far okay but I’m still on high alert just in case.

So since this drama was seemingly over and she would have literally NO REASON to contact me, at least for the day - I decided I would make today a ME day. To try to get me back on track as much as possible. I went to the pharmacy to try to straighten out some stuff with my meds but there was a setback and it’s gonna be a little bit trickier for me to get back on my anxiety/depression meds than previously thought. But I wasn’t feeling defeated so I switched gears and chose to decompress and get all the bad energy out. Maybe after 30 mins of leaving my place, I come back from the pharmacy to check my phone and i have two texts from her about the electricity temporarily being turned off & some other unimportant shit. Quickly texted that I wasn't home yada yada didn’t care byeeee. 

Shortly after I started to drive around aimlessly and listen to music. I drove through my high school best friend’s old neighborhood, by her old house and down the street to the park we used to always go to. I parked and sat there in my car for maybe 45 minutes. Just thinking of what my life has been for the last 15 years since I first went to that park. That no matter how many years have past, I still feel everything from back then, I still feel her. That I will always love and miss who she was in that snapshot in time even though I know she is no longer that person, without even having to know who she is now. That this void that she left can never be filled again, not even by her because that person, the person that I formed quite possibly the closest bond I’ve ever made - is gone. She’s so gone, she may as well have died. It happens and is a part of life and I’ve long since accepted it but that doesn't mean it doesn’t still break my heart. 

After the park I made my way to the city where my mother grew up and unintentionally ended up in the neighborhood of my grandmother’s old house. Maybe I wasn’t cognizant of what I was doing in the moment but maybe somewhere in the back of my mind I purposely led myself there. As soon as I saw the sign for Kelley Ave. i immedietely started tearing up and I just needed to see the house. Even if it doesn’t look the same, even if someone else lives there now. I drove by and it set off a bunch of emotions at once. Every couple of years I hit this point where i really miss her. The last time it was like this was my 25th birthday that I ended up spending alone. On my way home it was like a dam had burst and I couldn’t stop crying. I got home and decided I would take the rest of the afternoon to go for a walk, focus on getting through my emotions in peace. I walked to a park not too far. I ended up laying down, listening to music and bawling my eyes out. I started running all these memories of her through my mind. I wouldn’t say I came to the realization but in reflecting on the last 15 years it’s become glaringly apparent that the only safe space I’ve ever had was with her, in that house. Not the one I grew up in and definitely not where I am now. I kept trying to imagine what it would be like for 31 year old me to be able to show up at her house, walk through the door, into her kitchen, straight towards the sun soaked living room where she would be sitting in front of the glass coffee table like she always was. She’d probably be writing on napkins in Japanese, with the TV on, not watching what was on. I would sit down next to her and hug her and she would hug me back and tap my shoulder and say “Hi Chantel.” like she used to, in her strong accent, with her warm smile. And we would sit next to each other in comfortable silence like we always did and I would watch her as she scrawled her native language on leftover McDonald’s napkins. My grandmother was and still is the only family member of mine that I was ever allowed to be myself in her presence. Maybe it was a cultural thing, it just never crossed her mind that I needed to change/fit a particular mold because it wasn’t an idealogy she was familiar with, unlike my ant’s, parents, uncle’s etc. We had a great relationship, I was her first grandchild and I know that had a lot to do with it. I knew her relationship with my mom and my ant’s/uncle’s were more complicated, so not everyone has the same feelings about her as I do. But I was her favorite and she was mine and it is the only time I have ever been anyone’s favorite. She died when I was 14, she’s been gone for basically half my life now but I still would give anything to see her now and I don’t think I will ever get used to her being gone, no matter how long. All I want is to be next to her, we don’t even need to talk, I just want her to be able to be here now. I miss her so much, all I want is the chance to be with her again...

After an hour or so I walked back and started to feel a little better. Maybe not better but felt like I was able to let a lot out. All I wanted to do was go home, wind down and salvage the rest of the day and indulge in much needed self care. Where I currently stay, I have my own separate entrance attached to the main house but in order to get to my entrance I have to pass by the front of the house which currently has one of those doorbell’s with a camera attached that alerts people on their phone when there is any movement. I unlock my door and get inside. I literally put my keys, phone etc down and maybe 5 seconds pass since I’ve gotten inside and a text pops up from my landlord. 

“Nothing like fresh air for the soul! Hope your feeling better. I have good and bad days too!” 

I think this is the only moment I've ever wanted to murder someone.

I just came back from spending two hours mourning my dead grandmother, after a day filled with repressed emotions coming to the surface due to an awful few weeks (mostly due to my landlord) and I can't even come home with the expectation that I wouldn’t be bothered by her for the rest of the night. 

Today was just not the day. 

Not the time, place or her business. 

I feel like I have no peace anymore, the little I was able to grasp on to.

She has stolen it from me with her unchecked neurosis, constantly invading common boundaries. 

I’m at my wits end, truly. And I’m not sure what to do.

AND GODDAMN. I CAN’T EVEN FINISH THIS FUCKING POST WITHOUT MY PHONE NOTIFYING ME I’VE GOTTEN A TEXT FROM HER.

GTHGTYYJ$%$%$$#$#!@@@@!!!

(Insert the dog surrounded by fire “I’m fine” meme) 

Singing off with whatever’s left of my sanity.

xx. 

[frostiifae]

hi i’m not gonna engage directly with that post about masculinity and the pressures it’s put under growing up bc i am much too fragile for that, but also my feelings on that post wind up going out to jupiter and back instead, so sorry about this but --

I’ve been mulling over the idea that maybe social media, as a whole, is a bad place for social discourse (shocking, I know). The core idea of it is simple - you take a statement like “men are overly sexual”. This statement is at least glancingly true, but not ironclad. It is true enough to make a specific point in context, but it isn’t true enough to project outward into the world without context.

People with more authority than me have already done plenty of research to demonstrate how modern social media is designed specifically to present ideas free of context. It’s virtually impossible to have a meaningful conversation in the open space of Tumblr, Twitter, or Facebook, for varying reasons - but the sites do their best to trick you into not noticing. 

In a post I exchange between my two best (female) friends, we may cajole about the horrors and ugliness of men, saying things we don’t really believe, partially tongue-in-cheek, partially to make fun of the radical ideas that say these things without the requisite irony. But it would be so very easy for someone - even someone that knows me, someone I care about - to stumble upon that post and misunderstand. In reality, that post wasn’t really meant to be public. It was just for the three of us, because we have a shared context that changes and colors the way our words are interpreted, and without that context - the things we make look alien, or worse.

How easy it is for this simple misunderstanding to repeat itself at progressively larger and larger scales. Isn’t it amazing how Anita Sarkeesian attempted to say something hardly controversial and completely understandable, but a lack of context drove an entire counter-cultural movement and drove a wedge into the heart of the community she wanted to speak to. Incredible how, even as we all rally behind the cries Black Lives Matter, Defund the Police, we still have people claiming to be races they aren’t, asserting themselves over marginalized voices without thinking - and how, even as I do my best to keep my mouth shut, I can’t help but wonder if something is being missed because I can’t find the words to ask the questions I wish I could ask. 

I keep wondering, what if I could just pluck one of those horrific alt-right reddit meme boys from their chair and sit on a park bench with them, offer to get them lunch, and just talk about our visions for the future. Surely, we’d disagree on a lot of things, but I’m used to that. I’ve always been a weird kid, and I found solace in understanding the why of people’s beliefs - people’s reasoning always made more sense to me than the conclusions they would reach because of that reasoning. And I really feel like we could find a lot in common, if we could break past the surface layer of what we believe, and instead talk about the experiences that led us there. After all, I, too, was once a disenfranchised middle-class white male on the Internet, whose favorite pastime was to lose themselves in an emerging culture of chaos and creativity that seemed impenetrable from the outside. I, too, was once frustrated with the posturing of feminism, with the idea that men ought to be judged demographically without regard to their individual status. I still am frustrated with that idea, even now that I’ve come to grips with why it keeps coming up. I can’t say that it’s false. But I can’t say that it’s true, either. 

I wish I could explain that it doesn’t matter whether it’s true or false - that it never has mattered - that none of this was ever about telling people how they should think, or what words they are and aren’t allowed to use, or how they should volunteer their assets in the name of the less-privileged, or how they should sit at the back of the bus to make way for the flavor of the month. I wish I could explain that I understand how it seems from the outside, I really do, because I was there once, and it seems like such a mess of contrarian nonsense that can’t even find time to agree with itself, but you have to understand, it’s not about rules and regulations, it’s not about a strict moral or social code, it’s just about trying these ideas out in a public space and seeing if they make things better for people, because the way the world is now isn’t working. 

But I know what would happen if I tried that: I would get told, “And what about me?” and, well, there’s the rub, isn’t it? What about you? 

Is it selfish to focus on one’s own problems? Is it “male privilege” to listen to a talk about feminism and ask “but what about us?” Does that make you a pillar of the patriarchy? I feel like the answer is so obviously no, but we keep reacting that way, because when some dude comments on a feminist post and all we have to go off of is a name, an anime avatar (and believe me, I love anime avatars, so don’t think for a second I’m going to judge you for having one) and a single off-color remark, we have to come to some kind of judgment and it’s never going to be accurate. We tried so hard to teach everyone to think about the person behind the screen, but at the same time the Internet evolved in such a way that we know less and less every day about the screennames we come into contact with; the mountain is being built higher and higher ahead of us as we climb. 

I think the solution is to just stop. I really, really do. 

I was educated in feminism by a person who sat down with me in a series of one-on-one conversations and answered my questions as patiently as they could. I’m not friends with that person anymore - we wound up having a lot of disagreements on finer points, even besides the way we actually treated one another - but I deeply appreciate that time they spent with me. I refined my knowledge of feminism by taking those conversations to other people I trusted, and seeing how they felt about those ideas, further whittling away at this chunk of philosophy I had been given, turning into a thing I, personally, could believe in. This is the way human beings learn: we find a teacher we trust to confide in, we find a place to practice that feels safe so that we can try things out, and we build up confidence in private before taking our findings into the open. 

What do we accomplish by taking two people who have already cemented their convictions and bashing them against each other in a public space? Spectacle. That’s really all there is to it. Hate to sound like an old batty cynic but social media really is built around social spectacle. Twitter’s Trending tags, fandom discourse, political pages on Facebook mocking each other in memes that spread through social circles while dissidents look on in quiet disgust. The point of the whole model is to turn human culture into a hadron collider. This is not the place for nuanced debate. We should all know better. But, somehow, we don’t. And all the worse for the younger people caught in the crossfire that don’t understand what’s happening. 

It’s funny how you hear about things happening to other kids, parents and teachers and principals setting rules that seem completely ridiculous and unfair, and then you grow up and start to realize that - even if you still disagree - there’s a hint of wisdom in there. I dunno, maybe we should be withholding the internet from our kids until they’re adults. Not because they’re not mature enough for the Internet, but because the Internet isn’t mature enough for them. 

ᵒⁿᵉ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰᵉˢᵉ ᵈᵃʸˢ ᶦ ᵍᵒᵗᵗᵃ ᵐᵃᵏᵉ ᵐʸ ᵒʷⁿ ˢᵒᶜᶦᵃˡ ᵐᵉ��ᶦᵃ ˢᶦᵗᵉ

[toogayforthistoday]

hey gabe! can i ask 3, 5, 6, 8, 11, and 14 for your yyh insert :0???

frgbshdfh Hi Benji!! Thank you for the ask!!

3. Who in their canon are they closest to? Who would they drop everything to come help, if anyone? Who’s the person they’re least close to? Who would they most likely not get along with, if anyone?

Gabe’s always been pretty close with Yusuke and Hiei. Yusuke ended up as more of an older brother to them, and was the first one they came out to when Gabe realized they were non-binary. And Hiei’s their mate, soo...

Keiko, Yukina and Gabe were the ones who usually ended up in trouble: Getting kidnapped, picking fights with the wrong people,

The one they’re least close to is probably Botan, but only because she wasn’t around that often. Being a Pilot of the River Styx keeps you rather busy.

The only person Gabe ever had an issue with, was Koenma, but only when they were younger. Being allowed to help Yusuke and the other on missions for the young ruler came with a lot of stipulations and rules, especially concerning their abilities, so the two butted heads quite a bit. Once they got older Gabe realized Koenma was doing what he could on his end to keep them safe while under his fathers rule.

5. Does your insert have any magical talents or otherwise special abilities? Are they passive, like the ability to befriend animals, or dangerous power that the villains want? Or if theyre evil - any powers the heroes want to stop?

About that same time I originally came up with my s/i, I was obsessed with Charmed, no shame. So, Gabe is a witch, from a long line of powerful witches. They came to Genkai’s temple so they could learn how to control their magicks, otherwise it would run wild; Spells would either fizzle out, or be 10 times more powerful than it needed to be. Their lack of emotional regulation also caused issues with their powers, making the spell backfire’s worse. That kind of power tended to draw the attention of people like the Black Book Club, who were obscenely rich humans who have their hands in many of Demon World’s pockets.

It’s also the kind of power that’s attractive to power-hungry demons that are convinced that if they eat someone with that kind of strength, they’ll gain it. Now, that’s true for psychics, not so much witches. But most of these demons are too stupid to tell the difference between the two.

6. Do they fight? What’s their weapon of choice? Do they stay on the sidelines? What would it take for them to get off the sidelines? Revenge? Saving a loved one? What’s the motivation for them to fight, or to stay OUT of a fight?

In the beginning, no, Gabe did not fight. They were afraid of using their magicks because of the lack of control they had, and generally stayed on the sidelines with Yukina.

Yusuke, being the big brother he was, taught them how to take a hit and brawl. When Hiei had started gaining an interest in them, he started teaching them basic defensive tactics, eventually moving on to team them swordsmanship. No need to rely on unstable powers there.

Once they’d gained control of their powers, Gabe fought more often, even going with the boys on some missions for Koenma. But because of the way King Yama was ruling, Gabe was very limited on what they were allowed to do, concerning their powers, causing Gabe and Koenma to butt heads rather often, Yusuke and Hiei siding with Gabe about the muzzle orders.

Gabe has a very short temper, similar to Yusuke’s, and a smart mouth with no filter, which gets them into quite a lot of trouble. They’ve ‘settled down’ over the years, in a way, taking a page out of Kurama’s book, and wielding their sharp wit to get Keiko and Yukina out of trouble from people looking to get at Yusuke, Kuwabara and Hiei, and turn the attention onto them so the girls can get away. Gabe can handle themselves in a fight with damn near anyone at this point, and whether they’re getting backup or not won’t stop them from fighting for their little family.

8. How do they fit into their canon world? What’s their role to play, if any? Do they have a big destiny? Or do they more live as a side character that’s helpful for the protagonists/antagonists?

They’re a side character. A pain in the ass side character, but there’s no prophecy to fulfill for them, no destiny to achieve. Just helpful to the main cast.

11. How easy is it to make your insert angry? Sad? How easy is it to twist their emotions into negative things? By contrast, how easy are they to cheer up? What can brighten a bad day?

It does not take much to make Gabe angry. They’ve gotten a better handle over how their emotions control them, yes, but it only takes a smart remark, or a wrong look before Gabe’s telling the poor schmuck off, or just getting into a fist fight.

Making them sad is a little harder to do. Gabe has their own inner demons they have to try and contend with, and if anyone thinks Gabe’s just gonna go ahead and let some uppity little nobody try and ruin their day when they were doing it just fine on their own? Now they just have an excuse to blow off some steam. And there goes their bad day.

To cheer them up, the girls usually team up and invite Gabe out for a Spa Day, Kurama sometimes tagging along as well if he’s back in Human World. Yusuke treats them to a bowl or two of ramen from his cart. Kuwabara’s go-to is to invite Gabe over to help him take care of his new foster kittens.

Hiei initiates cuddle time, and spending time with their mate will always make Gabe feel better, no matter how bad their day was.

14. Does your insert have any family relations? How do they get along? How do they disagree? Is it a biological family? Adopted? Or is it found family? How did this family come together, if it was one of the last two?

Gabe’s only living relatives are their cousin’s back in Canada, from the non-witch side of their family. They don’t really talk much, other than the obligatory “Happy Holidays, we’re still alive!” phone calls and cards. Their mother died from cancer, shortly after they came to Japan to train under Genkai, and their father died the same way shortly after Gabe and Hiei’s 3rd anniversary.

Yusuke, Keiko, Shizuru, Kuwabara, Yukina, Hiei, Botan, and Kurama all make up Gabe’s little found family, and they wouldn’t trade them for the world.

Self Insert Development Meme