#Boundaries

[whatbigotspost]

Me and this bird and its creator on Instagram have a thought for you today.

For the past few years, I have fancied myself somewhat of a recovered people pleaser. Unfortunately, recent personal and professional experiences have proven to me with a gruesome and upsetting clarity that while I might’ve made some progress on this element, I am still all too quick to sacrifice my own well-being and happiness for others who wouldn’t even spit on me if I was on fire.

I want to extol the virtues of being generous and kind and not self-centered… But the older that I get the more that I realize that pretty much is nobody out there who will have your back. So if you don’t have your own back, a lot of folks that will see that and be happy to exploit it.

I’m not saying don’t trust others. I’m just saying don’t sacrifice anything for people who barely even see you.

[stormofsyren]

And the second you cause 0.0001% stress, GONE!!! Vanished! 🤣😂 He's right!

This paints such a beautiful picture

[bexiescorner]

[thepeacefulgarden]

[succulentsiren]

How to Prioritize Yourself

(in other words, how to put yourself 1st)

1. Before making a decision, ask yourself, “Is this beneficial for me?”

2. Second ask yourself, “Do I want to do this? If so why?” Make sure that whatever you do is serving your best interests.

3. Always take care of your needs. Treat yourself like you would your child. Maintain your basic hygiene. Make sure you've eaten and drank water. Keep up with your skin care. Give yourself compliments and support your dreams. Be financially stable and provide security for yourself. Give yourself everything you desire.

4. Don’t rush or let others push you into doing something you don’t want to.

5. Put your standards on the pedestal. Form your own judgement about things and don’t be persuaded easily.

6. Do what you set your mind to regardless of opposition.

7. Always be in tune with what you desire and never compromise your standards.

8. Fill your own cup first. Invest in yourself.

9. Set clear boundaries and start saying no when you mean it.

10. Release all shame surrounding your self prioritization. Understand, people won’t care about your wellbeing. You have to be the one looking out for you.

11. Gate-keep yourself from those undeserving of your love and energy.

12. Don't tell all your business. Move in silence and cherish your privacy.

13. Stay self-sufficient.

14. Do the things YOU enjoy. Have your favorite cup of coffee. Eat your favorite snack. Watch your favorite show. Do tarot readings. Read occult books. Wear makeup. Dress up. Don't shrink your beliefs, lifestyle or presence just because someone else disagrees with it.

15. Ignore unsolicited advice.

16. Stop trying to prove your worth and just be. You are already enough as you are. You habe nothing further to prove.

[moonhedgegarden]

[unwelcome-ozian]

[chibird]

Saying no can feel uncomfortable, but by doing so, we can protect our sanity and boundaries. Saying no is a healthy practice! 👏

Chibird store | Positive pin club | Instagram

[aroaceenjolras]

Yeah, aces can have sex! Congratulations on figuring out that labels don't dictate behavior, they describe it. But do you ever consider that even aces who have sex don't always have happy-sparkly-sunshiney relationships with sex?

Have you considered how your rhetoric might sound to an ace person who sexually self-harms?

Have you considered how your rhetoric might affect ace people with OCD compulsions related to sexuality or sexual activity?

Have you considered that some ace people who have sex only do so because they're convinced that they won't be worth anything unless they do? How does this interact with your discussion of "doing it for your partner"?

Have you considered how your rhetoric affects fraysexual people who are already made to feel insecure about the fact that lessening sexual interest is part of how their relationships mature over time?

Have you considered that we are a disproportionately sexually traumatized population and often have difficulty setting sexual boundaries because of it?

I don't think you have, no. I think you see an ace person having sex and automatically think their relationship with sex is fun, happy, and empowering even when it's obviously not.

I think if you people actually gave a shit about consent, your advocacy for aces who choose to be sexually active would be less about reminding them that they can have sex and more about helping them learn how to make sure their experience with sex, if they're going to have one at all, is beneficial to them.

[homocidalpotat]

Please do not send me asks for donations

Here's why (for if you find that statement hard to understand):

I have NO money to give you.

I don't have a big enough audience for my asks to get noticed.

I am a minor, and most of my followers/mutuals are too.

It makes me feel extremely guilty.

Seeing pictures of injuries or hospitals etc are triggering and/or upsetting for me. These pictures often have blood, gore, extreme medical situations, hospital environments, etc. I'm not saying I don't feel sympathy for them, I'm saying I do not want to see that.

They are always worded in a way that makes me feel like I am a murderer if I don't donate.

I said I don't want them, and my boundaries should be respected. They make me feel uncomfortable, and sometimes triggered or upset.

I can't tell what is a bot/scam and what isn't.

I get a lot of spam from this.

Please, just respect the fact that I have said this.

If you want this in your pinned post, please don't credit me. You can copy the words or take a screenshot with my username cropped out. You can reblog this but please don't go on about how awful your experiences have been. I get it, but also if you spiral two much you might end up accidentally saying something bad. This post has led to a lot of hate anons and harassment, so I would rather not have too much attention. Thanks...

I am pro Palestine and want to do everything I can to help but I'm not financially or mentally well enough to do much. I'm not in support of these people dying. Also, this post isn't just about Palestine. It's about ALL asks for donations. I'm not doing favouritism or racism. I just can't deal with it. Don't harass me for expressing boundaries. This post applies to people of all nationalities and backgrounds. Every situation- war, poverty, injury, anything. I'm not discriminating. I'm not being a zionist or a racist or an ableist. It's a boundary.

Yes, this post might seem controversial. But I did literally make this for my own personal experience and didn't expect it to get more than 12 notes or so. Don't add opposing views because quite frankly, it's none of your business. It's not my problem and I didn't mean for this post to get so many notes. Don't use the number of notes as an excuse to fight me. I just want a peaceful Tumblr experience. Also, if you are reblogging this, don't trauma dump. I keep notifications on for this post so that I can block people harassing me before shit escalates, so I can see every reblog. You can screenshot and repost if you want to talk about your problems, but honestly its no better seeing people saying "I'm bankrupt and I just got kicked out by my family. I also have a history of abuse and those images are so triggering that I want to die". That doesn't help me. Make your own post to say that. Please.

I am taking this post off private after slightly modifying it. Any conflicting arguments based on this post will result in my blocking and reporting of you. If you do not understand my point of view, make sure you fully read the post before saying this. I made this post for my blog. If you have any questions or don't understand this post, send me an ask that is composed, calm and polite, and I can talk it through with you.

Please note that by sharing this post, you are more likely to be targeted by bots and scams. You are also more likely to be harassed. Please be safe.

[classycookiexo]

[girlwithrituals]

HOW TO SET BOUNDARIES

1. identify your core values and personal limits, and let them guide your decisions.

2. identify certain traits in people that drain you or traits that you can't tolerate in people in your circle, then limit interactions with these people or activities. ex: narcissism, people who only talk about themselves, people who only come to you to complain, people who ask too much questions about your life, people who always feel the need to have an “upper hand”

3. purge toxic social media accounts and limit exposure to negative online content as over consumption of social media is damaging to the subconscious mind. too much scrolling, too much consumption, too much reading other people's thoughts and opinions, too much looking at other people's lives is a sure way to undervalue what's actually happening in our own personal lives. i don't want to mindlessly consume. it has the power to ruin my moods. it has the power to destroy my self image. my perception of other human beings. and so much more.

4. healthy intellectual boundaries these include awareness around appropriate discussion topics as well as respect for the opinions of others. these boundaries are violated with the dismissal of someone else's thoughts or ideas.

5. practice saying "no" without feeling guilty.

6. create designated alone time to recharge. free from external demands. ex: discernment at the end of the day, meditate, thought diary to acknowledge and label all of the unnecessary thoughts.

7. communicate your boundaries assertively and respectfully to those around you and remain consistent in enforcing your boundaries, and don't be afraid to reinforce them.

8. set strict work-life boundaries by establishing specific start and end times for work.

9. create financial boundaries by setting rules about lending money or sharing expenses.

10. prioritize your self-care and schedule time for activities that nourish your well-being.

[singledoubletriple]

quick reminder that it’s always cool totally amazing sexy behavior to talk about boundaries before talking about sex 🎀

[thepeacefulgarden]

[quinnysnursery]

quinny's regression-safe youtube channels ! 𓂃⋆.˚

youtube channel recs for littles ones !! [dividers by @d-oie]

story book readers //

reading rocket 📚🚀 ~ fallon is an amazing woman who reads children's books [both classics and new stuff !]. she has an amazing narration voice that instantly captivates you into any story she reads !

vooks 🎥📖 ~ with this channels adorable animations, calming music and narration (with subtitles available !) - this channel is easily one of my favorites !!

storytime at awnie's house 📕🏠 ~ awnie is possibly the cutest lady i've ever seen !! she encapsulates a warm yet silly "mom" vibe and is incredible at doing voices for whatever book she's reading !!

toy channels //

relaxing unboxing sounds 🧸🎁 ~ a voiceless channel where the creator simply opens up blind boxes/bags !! it's so fun guessing who they're gonna pull !!

bin's toy bin 🪀🎁 ~ a husband and wife who reviews toys !! they specialize in my little pony toys !!

disney themed youtubers //

4k wdw 🏰 ~ they upload walkthroughs of the disney parks and videos of the disney parades !! super cool for littles who love the disneyworld/land parks, or are wishing to visit !!

document disney 🐭 ~ they upload walkthroughs and povs of disneyland rides !! super cool for littles who love the disneyworld/land parks, or are wishing to visit !!

misc //

mittens & pants 🐱🐶 ~ a kitten and puppy who are best friends and travel around their make believe town !! honestly my favorite channel listed !! PUH-LEASE check them out !!

disclaimer : it is to my knowledge that none of these channels are run by bad people, or contain swearing. if this is wrong i deeply apologize- though i researched to the best of my extent.