#grammar hell

[f-list-questionable]

am i having a stroke

[usinguntiligetmyaccountback-blog]

dndads Kelsey grammar really is the character of all time. She’s a teacher. She’s a boxer. She’s a gambling addict. She’s a plagiarist. She once had sex so bad she counted it as -1 on her body count then proceeded to join a bowling team with the guy. She loves crime shows. She has weight in all the right places (which is everywhere). She is a safe haven for teens who are not bisexual because that hasn’t been invented yet. She made a deal with an eldritch horror to help her with her encyclopedias. She even has vaguely homoerotic tension with a robot. What can’t she do?

[severuwus]

Snape was definetely a bitch to his students, but at least he was a somewhat responsible teacher. He'd make his students scrub cauldrons or clean nasty potion ingredients for detention, but it wasn't him who sent 1st year students over to Hagrid's to wander around the Forbidden Forest at night ON THEIR OWN with only a dog at their side, while something unknown is attacking other creatures.

Y'all call Snape a terrible teacher for being scary and mean and abusing a toad, but I don't see anyone uttering a word about Hagrid and McGonagall literally endangering children's lives: McGonagall for thinking that sending 1st year students who had 0 experience in defense and fighting to accompany Hagrid into the Forbidden Forest at night was a reasonable detention (note: students had been warned multiple times to not enter it as it was a very dangerous place). And Hagrid. He deserves his own post on that scene alone.

Bro would have been dead furious if 11 year old Malfoy had told him about Hagrid separating him and Neville in the Forbidden Forest at night with only a dog as "protection" while some creature was actively hunting.

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

sorry im crying over this. yes you're right james loves sirius, he never stopped.

[green-green-grass]

🎵 an inch away from more that just friends! 🎵

[parasocial-paradox]

Rebrand Trailer Screenplay Pitch

Throwing my proverbial prophecy-hat into the ring here in the buildup to the imminent rebrand! Considering how much fun they had with the first one, it seems pretty likely that we might get a trailer similar to the absolute cinema that was the gaming channel's revival announcement. With that in mind, i had my own stupid ideas for what this might look like, so i put a little screenplay together. Here’s what i’m squinking:

Something something. Parasocial subversion of expectations-themed "wedding", plus the wedding itself looking like it was plonked on top of the funeral set to represent parting with the past and embracing something new. There's symbolism here I swear

[cricket-toast]

"written WITH ☝️ AI not 🙅‍♂️ by AI 😊" i am going to run my car into your house.

[shadelorde]

cant hold my silence any longer im sorry. mako was a dick to korra in s2. i know we're having this resurgence of mako love but i could not stand the way he treated her in that season. "maybe you wouldnt have to fix things if you didnt keep messing it up" and ratting korra out to raiko and being dismissive of her and LYING to her about their breakup after he kissed asami. korra was dealing with her uncle grooming her and colonizing her home. and he treats her like this when shes confused and upset like idk. idk

[jazeswhbhaven]

I couldn't help myself I wanted to write something about this....(credit to @bakdbfi for the screenshot)

(soft, vanilla, passionate sex, serious!Asmodeus, GN!Reader)

When you arrived at the designated cabin in the dense forest and mountains on Earth, the snow quietly falling, the chill air nipping at your nose...you had no idea what Asmodeus was thinking inviting you so suddenly.

Stepping into the cabin, it's warm, the scent of smoky wood and cinnamon greeting you like a blanket of comfort. Your mind was set at ease, despite the location being in the middle of nowhere and the usual antics of the devil you met in Hell. What could he really be planning?

As you take off your boots you see a trail of rose petals on the floor, leading you to the back of the cabin where you're certain the bedroom is located. This seems...out of character for him, right? You're normally met with the usual in your face, cock out, flirty intensity where you swear he was in heat by the way he drooled at the sight of you.

Not tonight. In fact, he was nowhere to be seen. You weren't sure if you should be worried, but you walk the path set before you. When you reach the bedroom it's even more cozy than the living room. Warm lights, a thick and fluffy bed with plenty of pillows and blankets, a small fireplace with the sounds of crackling and pops of burning wood. The window though covered with sheer curtains, giving you a romantic view of the snow covered pines. It was perfect in every sense of the word and your comfort levels were more than relaxed.

"I can tell by your body language, that you love it."

Large, soft hands reach over your shoulders and down your collarbones as Asmodeus whispers tenderly in your ear.

"I said I'd make this a wonderful memory, though I'm sorry I couldn't give the full experience of putting the little ones to bed."

Your first reaction is soft laughter, realizing that his text to you on Christmas was serious now that the two of you were here. This was the only time he could get you alone and away from the other Kings, but you assumed it was just another quick dick appointment.

However, right now he wasn't laughing with you, or saying his usual overly sexual comments that made you cringe. In fact, he was peppering kisses on your neck, gently massaging your chest and tugging at your sweater.

"Get in the bed, please?"

It shouldn't have made you shiver, but it did. While it was a request, the hint of controlled restraint in his voice had you realize he was struggling to be patient in your presence. If he could do that, then it must meant this was serious. You couldn't help but oblige. Though, you didn't have to be told to remove your clothing because you knew what was going to happen in this room. He made that abundantly clear.

You crawl into the thick blankets, soft to the touch and luxurious in quality. Everything is off your body, well aside from your underwear. Asmodeus smiles, crawling after you and picking up your leg to kiss your ankle up to your calf. As he holds your foot against his cheek he looks at you lovingly, taking in the sight of you before he speaks again.

"I said I was going to make love to you, and I mean it..."

Your breath hitches as he pulls you forward, one leg propped up as he easily slides off the only garment left. He groans softly when he sees how ready you are, your sensitive parts swollen, glistening with arousal that had been building since he started kissing your neck.

He taps your hips, giving you the signal to flip over on your stomach. The moment you do, he bends down, his tongue sliding over your hole as he eats you out from the back. You arch your hips, the sudden sensation driving you wild. Between the flicks and kisses of his lips and tongue you're already a mess of pleasure and he keeps at it for a few moments, until he changes your position again.

You're on your back again, legs spread as he goes back down to continue running his tongue against your parts like he was starving. You could feel just how wet and slick his lips were, how his tongue dipped in and out of you as you try not to clench so early or it would send you past your peak. But he doesn't care, repeatedly hitting the same spot over and over until you come, the first of many the night would bring.

He changes your position once again, not done with you just yet. having your back rest against his chest, your head titled up to meet his gaze as he leans down to capture your mouth in a deep and passionate kiss. In the meanwhile, his long and slender fingers plunge into your quivering hole, pumping and curved against that sweet spot deep inside that he knew so well. He was slow, intentional and considerate, speeding up when you whimpered, slowing down when you were more focused on intertwining your tongue with his. He didn't stop until you gasped, moaning into his mouth to indicate another orgasm.

"I think you're ready for me, my love..."

With a soft smile and kiss on your forehead, he pushes you down face forward on the comforter, the part that wasn't covered in your fluids. He carefully brings up your hips, pressing the tip of his cock at your entrance as you wiggle against him to wordlessly beg for it. He gives you a playfully smack on the thigh, sliding into you, making sure every inch is felt.

His thrusts aren't like how they usual are, each stroke deep, with care his hips rolling and grinding like a sensual dance. There was even a point where he leaned over to kiss your back as he pressed further and stayed there just for a moment. You wish he'd stayed there forever as you cockwarmed him but he moves again which has you whimpering and moaning back to back.

"I want to see your face..."

The position changes again, both of your legs pressed back and your hips spread. All the time you'd hear about the "mating press" position and Asmodeus took this to heart. As he locked eyes with you, you swore he was thrusting into you so deeply that your insides were being rearranged. He'd lean down to take your lips again, the same deep-seated strokes that brought you to climax more times you could count.

It was like this all night, each position he'd switch you to was close, your body never leaving the comfort of his own if he could help it. There was a point when you were on your stomach again, but both of your arms were pinned against your back as he went wild, losing himself in the moment. The amount of times he had came were irrelevant to you because you were too drunk in your own ecstasy to notice.

It was only until the sun was shining through the window, your face against his chest as the two of you slept did you realize the night was over. You don't move, but your eyes look up at your lover surprised to see that he was asleep and not awake. He was mumbling in his sleep pulling you closer to him with no intent of letting go. And you had no intention of getting up either, your body and your energy spent with the lingering soreness of making love for hours. You didn't know how long he'd keep this up, but the change of pace made your heart full. Maybe, just maybe, you could do this forever.

[babacontainsmultitudes]

I would die for Kelsey btw I need her to beat Tucker over the head and kiss Trudy silly please she's everything Matt THANK YOU for playing an older woman (who's fucking 5'10 and beefy on top of it what a beautiful world)

[lynaferns]

Hi, hello. Did you say big bat vampire dca au? As in, they’re big bats? 👀

That sounds really cool!

Yeah, although I don't have a clear image of them yet.

I made a doodle of the three half(?) transformed

They are mixed species but each resemble one more than the others. (I messed up eclipses ears, drew the wrong shape)

(whoops little ramble about bats)

Sun is an Indian Flying Fox, a fructivore bat. They are one of the bigguest (1 to 2 ft tall and 4ft wingspan (great for hugs/j)) and helps with the forest pollinization. They can fly 40km in one night. They lack echolocation but has a better eyesight than other bats. It's endangered due to humans haunting them for their meat.

Moon it's a Common Vampire bat (and a bit of White Winged bat for the colors), they eat mammal blood. There are 3 vampire species: the common, White-winged and Hairy-legged, the common can eat blood from any mammal while the other two eat mainly from birds and humans. The common vampire is a good crawler, so they'll prefer to get close to their prey from the ground. The white-winged has these glands in its mouth that uses to spit a really nauseating smell when its being molested (like skunks but these spit on you), there is sulfur in the spit.

Eclipse has the more clear mixes to see and it's the smallest of the three, its a Welwitch bat (it has freckles!!), a big eared and has part of canyon bat (because of the colors too). It's insectivorous, they help with plagues. They pretty much just vibe, just leave them be eating half their weigh in bugs and both of you'll be happy.

Nor the vampire or fruit bat has tails.

And they all can give you

Rabiessssss ✨

I didn't look into every especie there is of bats, first of because there are like 1,000, most of them insetivorous, and second because there is varely any info about any especie that aren't the common ones.

[f-list-questionable]

[rebouks]

Previous // Next

Hey Bird Boy!

I promised I’d write didn’t I? I’m missing you already, which is kinda stupid and cheesy, but true! There aren’t any other kids around now the holidays are over, so it’s just old people and super outdoorsy people who walk really fast with weird sticks and stuff, lame! Daddy lent me his crappy polaroid he uses for work so I can send you pictures and stuff so at least I’ve got something to do, they won’t be as good as yours but it’s better than nothing.

I tried to get a good picture but it’s hard to hold this huge thing with one hand and this is the best I could do but my teeth are totally starting to grow back so maybe I won’t look so dumb soon.. you can’t really see em but I can feel em poking through!!! It kinda hurts but I suppose we only have to grow em once so it’s not so bad. Growing teeth as a baby doesn’t count cos you can’t remember it.. how many teeth does your little sister have?!

I’m super looking forward to getting to know you properly since I can ask you stuff now! I’ll try n remember to ask you things instead of talking about myself the whole-time cos that’d be annoying to reply to, wouldn’t it?

By the way.. I took a bunch of pictures of my dad until I caught him laughing just to show you that he can be fun and nice, not always grumpy! He thinks he looks cool with his gold teeth but I think they make him look goofy, like a wannabe pirate haha!! YARRR!

I set Amber free cos I started to feel bad about keeping her cooped up in that tiny plastic box and I don’t think I’d like it if I were her, like how I’m starting to hate this stupid tower! I miss looking at her but I decided to start collecting fancy rocks instead since they’re not alive and don’t have any feelings. Dad digs up stuff for work sometimes so it makes total sense!! He said I’m not allowed to join him for that but we can do it on our own instead.. he bought me a big pretty one to start my collection, even though it’s kinda like cheating it still counts!

We found a birdwatching book stuffed in the back of the bookshelf looking for this notebook and dad said we should put some food out to see which ones we could spot.. they attacked him whilst he was putting the seeds out though so he said it was a stupid hobby and that he didn’t want to do it anymore. GET READY FOR THIS!!!

Ahahahahaahaaa I almost dropped his camera laughing at him and he took it off me for a couple days but it was totally worth it, please please pleaaaaase keep this picture cos I almost didn’t wanna send it to you so I could laugh at it forever and ever hahahaha!!!!

Oh, and I told daddy to take some pictures of me whilst I wasn’t looking like you do cos I thought it’d be neat, but I forgot I asked him to do it and got mad at him cos I was in my pj’s and my hair was all crazy.. it’s kinda funny I GUESS!! Plus, he said it made us even for me sending you the picture of him with the birds so here you go BUT DON’T KEEP THIS ONE!!

I got carried away and forgot to ask you stuff so here’s a list!

How old are you?

When’s your birthday?

Do you have any pets?!

What’s your favourite food?

Do you have all your big teeth yet? (it totally looked like it but you never know!!)

I was gonna think of more stuff to ask you and now the back of this page looks really empty but my brain farted and I really wanna send you this so you can send one back! I’ll think of more I promise!! I’m looking forward to “talking” to you so I guess you can write about whatever you want.. and I wanna see your house!! I bet your pictures will be way better than mine!

Yours excitedly, Alex :]

[inkded]

Revalink week day 4 compliment

[that-fish-who-writes]

hello.

.

.

.

*deep inhale*

KEEFITZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

...uhhhmm.

.

what's a keefitz...?

I don't think I've ever heard of such a thing :( sorrryyyy /j

anyways wanna see this cool drawing I made of a certain two characters? :3 !!

[crowleysno1fan]

I go to a catholic school so its mandatory to take religion and I just remembered something I learnt and I like associated it with Good Omens and im actually ill 😭

“Six days for us could be 2 thousand years for God. So for God, it could’ve taken thousands of years to create the Earth. We don’t know how time works in Heaven.”

SO, depending on how long Neil Gaiman takes to write s3 and if he lines it up with OUR time, say it takes him a year or two and s3 comes out in 2026 Azi & Crowley will have been separated for three years. They would have been separated for three years for Crowley, but for Aziraphale, it could be hours, a few days, a few months, a few years, or it could be thousands or TRILLIONS of years since he’s seen Crowley last.

anyways thats what I thought about tysm for coming to my tedtalk 🎀