#grants for music projects

[gigslist]

Music Talent Development Grants

The ASCAP Foundation's talent development programs provide aid and encouragement to music creators who are in various stages of their careers.

THE ASCAP FOUNDATION SONGWRITER WORKSHOP SERIES - Pop, R&B, Jazz, Musical Theater, Film & TV, Gospel, Country... etc.

The ASCAP Foundation sponsors songwriter workshops in Musical Theater, Pop, Rhythm & Blues, Film & TV, Jazz, Gospel and Country, which are held in Chicago, Los Angeles, New York, and Nashville. The workshops bring participants face to face with leaders of the music community who, in an informal setting, can critique the writers' work, offer them individual attention, and give them practical advice on the business of songwriting.

For information regarding workshop schedules, please contact the Membership Department at ASCAP: New York: 212-621-6000 Los Angeles: 213-883-1000 Nashville: 615-742-5000

View List of Workshops

THE ASCAP FOUNDATION COMMISSIONING PROGRAM

Through a generous bequest from the Estate of Charles Kingsford, an ASCAP composer of many Art songs, The ASCAP Foundation Charles Kingsford Fund was established in 2000 to provide opportunities for ASCAP composers to write Art Songs. Over the year’s ASCAP composers who have received a Kingsford Commission include: Eve Beglarian, Lisa Bielawa, Steven Burke, Daniel Felsenfeld, Gabriel Kahane, Edward Harsh, Michael Hersch, Richard Hundley, Michael Ippolito, Gilda Lyons, Harold Meltzer, Ben Moore, Tamar Muskal, Frank J. Oteri, Robert Paterson, Paola Prestini, Grigory Smirnov, Aleksandra Vrebalov, Scott Wheeler, Alex Weiser and Damien Sneed. This program is by invitation only.

Mark Snow

THE ASCAP FOUNDATION MARK SNOW LECTURE SERIES

Thanks to the generosity of prolific and successful Film & TV composer and ASCAP member Mark Snow, The ASCAP Foundation Mark Snow Lecture Series has been established in partnership with Brooklyn College located in Brooklyn, N.Y.

The lecture series, which launched in spring 2018, provides a unique opportunity for aspiring film and tv composers, songwriters, composition and film students as well as SCL members to learn from Snow who will share his knowledge and experience.

Brooklyn native Snow has been making music since the 1950s. Following a start in the music industry as a popular recording artist with his band the New York Rock and Roll Ensemble, Mark made the switch to composer for television and film in the 1970s.

This prolific composer, best known for his scores for such television series as The X-Files, Smallville, One Tree Hill, Kojak, Millennium, Pasadena, Starsky and Hutch, Hart to Hart and Blue Bloods is the only ASCAP composer to receive the “Most Performed Background Music” award every year consecutively since the inception of the award in 1985-6, through the present. Mark’s iconic theme for the X-Files has been recorded by almost every musical genre, from pop, to country, hip-hop, heavy metal, punk and jazz to name a few.

Mark has been nominated 22 times for Emmy’s for his work on television series and television films including Helter Skelter, Children of the Dust, Oldest Living Confederate Widow Tells All and Something about Amelia. Recent film projects include the scores for the two X-Files movies, and the last four movies by the iconic French director, Alain Resnais: Private Fears in Public Places, Wild Grass, You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet and Life of Riley.

Mark will share his career highlights, career advice, experiences and insights as well as stories about people he has helped along the way and vice versa. A slide show featuring some of Mark’s film and TV music will serve as an outline for the discussion and lead to conversations about Mark’s creative process.

Jerry Herman

JERRY HERMAN:  THE BROADWAY LEGACY CONCERT

Jerry Herman: The Broadway Legacy Concert is a nationwide series of concerts and educational programs made possible by revered ASCAP member Jerry Herman. Herman is best-known as the composer/lyricist of the iconic musicals Hello Dolly!, Mame and La Cage aux Folles.  In addition to the concerts, The ASCAP Foundation Jerry Herman Broadway Legacy Prize will be awarded to students participating in a musical theater performing master class held in each touring city and hosted by the Jerry Herman Broadway performers.  Master class students will be invited to audition with a Jerry Herman song and two local students will then be selected by a panel of performers and mentors to perform in the concerts for each city. 

• View Past Recipients

ASCAP songwriter Chaz Langley performs with his band at the Kennedy Center.

SONGWRITERS: THE NEXT GENERATION. A PROGRAM OF EMERGING SONGWRITERS AND COMPOSERS DISCUSSING AND PERFORMING THEIR OWN SONGS. PRESENTED BY THE ASCAP FOUNDATION. MADE POSSIBLE BY THE BART HOWARD ESTATE.

"Songwriters: The Next Generation," a program of The ASCAP Foundation and The John F. Kennedy Center of the Performing Arts, showcases the work of emerging songwriters and composers in a free concert on the Kennedy Center's Millennium Stage. Each evening's hour-long program is designed to spotlight the talent of young songwriters and composers.

"Songwriters: The Next Generation," was conceived by the late jazz pianist, educator, composer and ASCAP Foundation Board member Dr. Billy Taylor. Dr. Taylor stressed the importance of showcasing the talent of contemporary composers who are also performers. To that end, following the performances, the songwriters engage in a conversation focusing on the craft of songwriting and their personal creative process.

All performances are webcast live, and archived for future viewing at http://www.kennedy-center.org/programs/millennium/.

THE ASCAP FOUNDATION MUSICAL THEATRE SONGWRITING PROGRAM IN PARTNERSHIP WITH ROSIE’S THEATER KIDS AND THE PROFESSIONAL PERFORMING ARTS HIGH SCHOOL

Students participating in The ASCAP Foundation Musical Theatre Workshop at the Professional Performing Arts High School in New York City

"I never thought I would be capable of writing a song let alone writing a melody. It was challenging because I never knew I could find my voice through songwriting. I’ve always written in private but have never shared my writing publicly which was a new experience for me.” I never thought I would be capable of writing a song let alone writing a melody. It was challenging because I never knew I could find my voice through songwriting. I’ve always written in private but have never shared my writing publicly which was a new experience for me.” 

These are the words of 16-year-old Ava, a participant in The ASCAP Foundation Musical Theatre Songwriting Program with her peers from the Professional Performing Arts High School in New York City. This 15-week intensive musical theatre songwriting workshop, taught by ASCAP writers Michael Finke and Alexander Sage Oyen, teaches students who did not realize they could create their own original songs, how to do just that! At the end of the semester, the students’ songs are performed in a showcase format by professional Broadway stars.

This program is in partnership with Rosie’s Theater Kids and the Professional Performing Arts High School in New York. This workshop was conceived by composer-lyricists Michael Kooman and Christopher Dimond, the writers of the wildly popular animated show Vampirina, as well as several successful stage musicals. They wanted to give high school drama students the opportunity to compose for the stage.

Ava expressed it best when she said: “All in all, this experience was a once in a lifetime opportunity. As artists we never truly realize how much goes into a song. We are always just handed material and are expected to memorize it. This process showed me just how much dedication it takes to produce that material; something that has meaning and a message behind it- Thank you ASCAP Foundation for giving me this wonderful opportunity.”

The ASCAP Foundation nurtures the talents of aspiring musicians by supporting programs, workshops and showcases in all musical genres that are both national and regional in scope. Organizations that provide the creative incentive and opportunities for young musicians to enhance their careers have also received ongoing support from The ASCAP Foundation. They include:

American Composers Orchestra Bang on a Can Boston University Tanglewood Institute Composers Now Festival Copland House From the Top Goodspeed Musicals Levine Music Los Angeles County High School for the Arts National Alliance for Musical Theater New Music USA New York Musical Theatre Festival New York Youth Symphony So Percussion The Conservancy of the Pantheon – Musicians Corner Young Peoples' Chorus of New York

https://www.ascapfoundation.org/

https://www.ascapfoundation.org/programs/talent

[agerasiaa]

Drew buys all his friends material stuff because he doesn't know how else to show attachment, and he doesn't want them to leave him. Some people say he shows off his money because he's self-centered, and yeah, he is, but he also buys his friends gacha switches and laptops just so they can play on them with him. Deep inside he's probably scared people would leave him if he couldn't give them something. That boy screams abandonment issues. (Past reveal when fr - my money is on the parents.)

And I remember this, and then I think of the episode where Jake was willing to give the laptop Drew bought him as soon as he remembered he even had it. It's also easy to sympathize with Jake in this situation: he had finally found people he related to, was desperate for their approval and getting them to accept him, and he definitely has people-pleasing tendencies too.

But he had also known Sean for like a week or two at this point and had been Drew's friend for years. He was so willing to give his laptop away just like that.  One of those material gifts Drew gave him as a show of attachment. This really shows Jake never tried to understand Drew, and Drew never tried to understand him. They are so tragic like wtf.

[rawliverandgoronspice]

my ambitions for the score of thralls (full version of the project I'm not sure when I'll admit what this project is exactly but I guess I'll have to eventually) are getting frankly ridiculous, but!!! I'm planning to develop a library of themes for everyone, and *especially* ganondorf who gets a billion musical ideas developed throughout the series, which gives me sooo many opportunities to develop fun moments of character development with just the music :>>

[thats-my-passion-right-there]

I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god

[miserylovesbees]

Maybe it's the 90s kid in me talking, and maybe it's just this particular location that sucks, but Chuck E. Cheese is kinda depressing these days

[spynorth]

lucas would get a kick out of ninja sex party, namely danny don’t you know because the idea of singing to your past self about things that are gonna come your way is a good one but also because he knows his version would straight up make his inner child think he was on crack.

also, thinking about the sometimes you stop hearing it line in regards to music from series 9, episode 6 (when i say thinking, i mean for the last 4 months. hunter goes ‘oh my god no’ every time i bring it up again) i think that its a bit of an over exaggeration when you take into consideration the context of the scene. once, when i was in a bad mood and hunter kept asking me what i wanted to eat and finally asked why nothing sounded good .. i was like “ sometimes eating just isn’t worth it. maybe i’ve just stopped being able to taste it.” and honestly, it has that same vibe. so while i do still stick to like .. my very first headcanon where i talk about him being really prone to sensory overload (same though, bro), he does in fact listen to music. there’s more i wanna say on that episode and i’m gonna get there eventually but take this vaguely written thing for now.

[dirt-mccracken]

AFI have been at this so long that I realized as of the STS20 show I will technically still be younger than Davey was when that album was released which is pretty fucking insane

[distantdarlings]

HAVE ME // t. nott

RATING: R / 4.8K WORDS

Theodore Nott x Fem Reader Insert

+ SUMMARY - *Requested, based on this* When you are paired with Cormac McClaggen for a mid-semester project, he takes it as an opportunity to shoot his shot. However, despite your numerous rejections, he doesn't seem to want to let up. That is until Theo gets involved.

+ WARNINGS - SMUT, depictions of violence (a small fight, specifically), blood described very briefly, Cormac is hitting on reader and won't leave them alone, language, oral sex (perf. on reader), kissing, dom!Theo, fem reader, not proof-read

+ MUSIC (listened to while writing) -

Hotel - Montell Fish

---

The chatter around the classroom slowly dwindled as Professor Snape silently slipped through the door of his office. Everyone was waiting patiently for the results of his decision from yesterday. He mentioned that the mid-semester project would be partnered rather than solo. To you, that was bad news, but to others in the class, it was good. You worked best when you didn’t have to sort out the ideas getting bounced around aloud. But if you had to work with a partner, please let it be someone halfway decent.

“So,” Snape starts, “I have here the list of partners for the mid-semester project. As a reminder, you will be handling very toxic materials, so for the sake of all of our time, be careful with them.” His expression hinted at boredom, despite the unfortunate things he was referencing. Last year, someone nearly lost a hand with this project, and—to be quite honest—that was one of the reasons you were so excited about it. You liked the challenge and, even better, overcoming it. But you couldn’t do that with a shitty partner. Your fingers crossed beneath your open notebook.

“Malfoy with Weasley, Berkshire with Granger,” he began listing the names. Your hips shifted uncomfortably. He was pairing everyone with the opposite house. Surely he’d grant you some mercy with how well you’d been doing in this class?

“—Nott with Finnigan—” Your thoughts were briefly interrupted as Theodore’s name was called. That was an interesting pairing; however, you knew that Potions was one of Theo’s strong suits, and, granted they worked well together, the both of them would successfully keep their eyebrows intact. 

Your eyes found the older boy, tracing over every line on his face. You were friends, pretty good friends. His whole group of Slytherins were friendly with you, really. But there was something about him that had shocked you to your core from the first night you’d met him and started chatting at the Sorting ceremony when the both of you were eleven. He was quite literally one of the most attractive people you’d ever seen, and it seemed like he knew it too. The way he held himself down to the way he communicated with people, he just knew he was alarmingly alluring. 

He had a way of staring right into your eyes when you spoke to him, almost to the point it felt as if he was reading your mind. No matter what, he’d give you his full attention, even more so than his other friends, it seemed. Maybe you had always imagined it, but if you called his name, he was there. He would be waiting with his ear next to your lips, eager to hear what you had to say, no matter how you were feeling. Perhaps it was cliche, but you felt as though you could tell him anything, and you did. 

His eyes found yours suddenly. His lips parted into a crooked smile, his dazzling white teeth peeking through slightly. You returned the action, raising your eyebrows in an amused fashion at his partner for the project. He shrugged, the smile never leaving his face. He pointed at you and mouthed, ‘You’re coming up.’ You rolled your eyes and laughed silently as you brushed him off. You were laughing, but, in all seriousness, this wasn’t a comedic matter. Your Potions grade was potentially on the chopping block here, and you were getting nervous. Snape didn’t grade depending on who did what; he simply graded on the project's legitimacy. You could do this by yourself, but if whomever your partner ended up being fucks it up, you both were screwed. And, on top of it all, you would have to work with a Gryffindor, someone you likely barely knew. Perfect. 

Your name perked your ears as Snape paused for a moment, trying to decipher his own handwriting. Merlin, was he trying to tease you? You glanced around, wondering who hadn’t been selected yet. You hadn’t been paying attention. “Ah! With McClaggen.”

Your heart sank. You turned to glance over your shoulder at the showy Gryffindor sitting in the back corner of the classroom. He sent a wink and a small smirk your way, to which you replied by quickly turning back around. Did the universe hate you? It must. That was the only answer. Shit.

“Get to work,” he instructed, returning to his office and firmly shutting the door behind him. You weighed out the options in your head on how angry Snape would be if you asked to switch partners. You were sure he picked them for a reason…or maybe he didn’t? Merlin, help. Should you even bother with this? Maybe you could convince McClaggen to let you do all the work. He could sit patiently by and be quiet.

The classroom bustled gently as students were standing and finding their partners. Small groans echoed as everyone paired up. Apparently, you weren’t the only one that disliked your partner. Usually, you wouldn’t have expected Professor Snape to have paired Gryffindors with Slytherins. Who knew? Maybe he was trying something new.

You hid a wince and got to your feet. You collected your notebook and school bag and made your way over to the smirking boy. His hands were placed cockily behind his head, and one leg rested, crossed over the other. He maximalized every bit of space he took up, like a peacock. You repressed a groan and sat down in the seat next to him, neatly spreading your things out. 

“Well, hello,” he cooed. “I don’t think I’ve spoken with you before.”

“I don’t think so either,” you chuckled nervously, eyes finding the back of Theo’s head. He sat towards the front of the classroom, partnered with the clumsy Gryffindor. You wondered if he was having the same doubts you were. As if on beat, his head turned and made eye contact with you. He hid a smile at your current predicament and gave you a small wave with his fingers. You rolled your eyes and, with the hand farthest from McClaggen, pretended to choke yourself with it. Theo laughed aloud before turning back around when his partner tapped his shoulder.

“What’s so funny?” your partner asked, quirking an eyebrow. 

“Nothing,” you smiled, “how about we get started?”

Most of the class period was spent discussing the potion the two of you wanted to brew. The assignment was to pick one of the most difficult potions to brew and to make and document the experience successfully. All of the potions you were to choose from were in the very last chapter of your textbook, and the two of you flipped through the pages, unsure. 

Every so often, Cormac (you’d learned his first name was) would point at something on one of the pages and scoot ever so closer to you. He was so close now you could smell the peppermint candy he swished around his mouth. His arm rested alongside the back of your chair, and you were…immensely uncomfortable. Your back straightened so as not to come into contact with his arm. 

Throughout this whole experience, you’d glance Theo looking back at the two of you every so often and wonder if you could signal him to distract the boy. It wasn’t that you felt threatened; you just wish he’d back the hell up. If you had a personal bubble, it had long since combusted. His face was so close to yours, and no matter how far you leaned away, he’d get closer. Finally, you’d had enough.

“Cormac,” you laughed nervously. You placed one hand on his chest and slowly pushed him back toward his own seat. 

“What is it?” he asked. No matter what you did, that stupid smirk never failed.

“You are very close to me,” you explained, trying to remain as polite as possible. He shrugged and chuckled a bit, gaining on some of the space you’d placed between the two of you. 

“Well, that’s because I want to get closer to you,” he said. 

“Uh, no,” you tittered, “that’s okay. Let’s just do the project.” You tapped the textbook and pretended to immerse yourself back in the information, hoping he’d let it lie. He didn’t. His arm wrapped back around your chair, and your eyes slipped close in exasperation. 

“Cormac, please—”

“What? Don’t you want to get to know each other before we do a project together?” he asked, scooting closer yet again.

“No, I really don’t. I just want to get this done.” His face resumed its previous proximity to yours. He smirked at the closeness and you sighed, turning your face away from his, begging Theo to glance back again.

“Oh, I see…is he your boyfriend?” Cormac asked. Your face shot back to his.

“What? No! He’s just a friend,” you said.

“That was a very quick, rushed answer,” he laughed, “but if you say so, that’s even better for me—”

“Please, let’s just do the assignment,” you pleaded, “I’m really not interested.”

“Not even for a trip to Hogsmeade?”

“No, not really, you’re not my type.” You glanced back at Theo. He was finally looking back. Only this time, his eyes were locked on the boy beside you, with his face so close to yours. His eyes gleamed blood red, and his jaw clenched tightly. Your eyebrows furrowed, begging him to intervene somehow. If Cormac wasn’t too embarrassed to shoot his shot in the middle of class, surrounded by his peers, you were almost positive he’d continue to harass you outside of the classroom. Maybe even when the two of you were alone, and he might not let up at that point.

“What is your type?” he asked. “Brooding assholes in Slytherin?” He said this part a bit louder, making direct eye contact with Theo. You could feel the tension building slightly, and did your best to diffuse the situation. You partially blocked their gaze of each other.

“Please don’t say that about him.”

“I thought you said he wasn’t your boyfriend. Why are you defending him?”

“He’s not my boyfriend, but he is my friend, and I’d like you not to call him names,” you spoke sternly, eyes hardening on the boy. He was plucking the last strings of your patience. 

“Fine, I will—” you nodded at his promise “—if you let me take you to dinner.”

The bell signalling the end of class interrupted the conversation. Thank Merlin. You quickly gathered your things together and shoved them into your bag, praying he’d just drop the subject and let you move on with your day. You’d figure out a way to deal with him later. For right now, you just wanted to get your free period started as soon as possible. He stood right when you did. You ignored him and made for the exit, walking as quickly as looked natural.

You were the first out of the classroom and down the hall, trying your best to get away from him without completely abandoning Theo. A hand grabbed your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks. It roughly spun you around, yanking a yelp from your throat. You stood before Cormac, who had a sinister look on his face. 

“You never answered me,” he said. “Let me take you to dinner…”

“No, Cormac, I don’t want to go,” you said, attempting to wrestle yourself out of his iron grip. What about your thousand answers was he not grasping? 

“Let go of me.” His hand did not release you, and it did not seem like he intended to, either. You slipped your hand between his and your shoulder, trying to edge it off. He made a sound of endearment before attempting to slide a hand around your hips. You squealed and squirmed away from him, trying to prevent him from wrapping his arms farther around you.

“Hey!” A voice shouted. The both of you began to turn, but before Cormac could get his head fully pivoted, a hand appeared on his shoulder and yanked him away from you. It was Theo, and he appeared to be fuming. His jaw was tightly clenched, and his eyes were wild.

“The fuck do you think you’re doing, McClaggen?” he demanded. “She said no, you dick!”

“I don’t see how it’s any of your business. She said you weren’t her boyfriend,” the younger laughed meanly, poking him roughly in the chest. You winced at the contact. 

“Don’t fucking touch me,” he hissed, pushing the boy back from him. Cormac stumbled a few steps before regaining his footing. It appeared he was as surprised as everyone else was at the sudden hostility. Cormac laughed cockily. 

He raised a hand and swung his fist at Theo as hard as he could, getting a good hit in. Theo’s head jerked to the side from the force of the punch, and you gasped sharply, hands shooting to cover your mouth in shock. Natural instincts told you to jump back, but you rushed toward Theo, who pushed you back gently behind him, squeezing your arm firmly. It didn’t hurt, but you knew it meant to stay put. 

“Come on, Slytherin!” Cormac shouted. “Show me what your reject house is made of!”

A crowd of other students had begun to gather around the two boys, curious to see what all of the commotion was. Adrenaline pumped through your veins like ice water as you watched Theo approach the other boy, cocking his arms and wringing any stiffness out of them. 

Before you could feel the exhalation of breath leave your body, Theo swung his arm at the boy, cracking him hard across the jaw. As if in slow motion, Cormac fell back and hit the ground with a hard thud. You imagined his tailbone would be quite bruised tomorrow morning. 

Theo fell down on top of the boy, legs resting on either side of his hips, and wailed on him. Fist after fist hit the boy’s face, pushing more and more blood out of him. You screamed in shock as you realized Theo had no intention of stopping. Around the same time you did, everyone else did too. They began throwing shouts of concern and pressing in on the two boys. Everybody loved a good fight now and then but nobody wanted to see someone get killed. 

Yet, nobody put their hands on Theo for fear of being in the same predicament as Cormac currently was. That was, until Enzo and Mattheo ran up behind the crowd. You heard them ask if that was Theo.

“Enzo!” you shouted his name, waving over the crowd. His eyes quickly found yours and in seeing the distress on your face, began weaving through the crowd. Mattheo quickly followed suit. 

When they breached the barrier of the crowd, their eyes widened, and they made for their friend. They grabbed his shoulders and pulled him away from the poor boy, his face a mangled mess. You looked away quickly, not wanting to see the damage that had been done in your favor.

Once pulled away, a gathering of students ran over to Cormac and covered him with a wall of their protection, trying to see if they could help him somehow. You turned to Theo, who was breathing heavily, a single dripping of blood pouring from his nose. You turned to the bottom of your uniform shirt, found the edge of the seam, and tore a small section of it. You could get a replacement sometime later.

You approached the boy with a murderous gaze and gently pressed the piece of shirt beneath his nose. He flinched slightly but never looked away from Cormac. Maybe that hadn’t been for you, and he’d just wanted to beat Cormac’s ass—which is understandable, but still. You weren’t totally sure why he did it.

“Theo?” you spoke gently. His glare didn’t waver. The fingers pressing the material against his bloodied nose tilted his face carefully to look at you. His eyes found yours, softening slightly. 

“I’m sorry,” he breathed, his chest heaving. “I couldn’t stand him touching you like that.”

“It’s okay,” you reassured. He didn’t seem convinced. How he looked at you with such concern and worry made you wonder if he thought you were mad at him. You shook your head at the question running through your mind. Obviously, he didn’t know what you had been thinking, but you hoped he’d understand somehow. 

You helped Enzo and Mattheo pull him to his feet and escort him away from the crowd before any of the professors showed up. Speaking of which, they likely should have been out here by now. 

As you helped the boys guide Theo toward the Slytherin common room, you were careful to avoid any obvious eyes that raced past them to see what the aftermath of the commotion was. Hopefully, nobody would notice them and they could deal with the whole situation later. The group turned the corner and stopped before the entrance to the dorm room. Enzo announced the password, and the lot of you headed inside, pulling Theo up the stairs and into the boys’ dorm room. He pulled away from them suddenly and sat on his bed.

“Alright, alright, I’m okay!” he declared. “I just got a sock to the jaw; my legs weren’t broken.”

“They’re just trying to help, Teddy,” you whispered, trying to place the cloth back on his nose that had started up its intermittent spurting again. He sighed and gently grabbed your wrist, holding it away from his face. He was never rough with you, despite how angry he was.

“I’m fine, I’m just wound up, I don’t need any of you to—”

“Nonsense,” you interrupted him. “Mattheo, Enzo, would the two of you mind running down to the hospital wing and asking Madam Pomfrey if she has anything to stop the bleeding. It’s not excessive, but it’s messy.”

“Is there not a spell or something like that?” Mattheo asked, clearly concerned for his friend.

“Not one that I know off the top of my head. Would you just go ask her, please?” you repeated yourself. The two boys seemed to hesitate but eventually worked their way out of the room with their destination in mind. Once they were gone, your eyes turned back to Theo’s. An amused glint lay suspended in his eyes.

“‘Nothing that comes to mind?’” he smirks. “If a spell comes to my mind and not yours, the world must be upside down.” You conceal a laugh. You knew a spell. You knew multiple healing spells, but you wanted Mattheo and Enzo out of the room for a second. You just wanted to speak with Theo about what had happened. 

“I’m sorry I lied to your friends,” you said. “But I really wanted to talk with you privately, and I didn’t want to wait.” His eyes keep a tight hold on yours. You swallow thickly. 

“Okay, what is it?” he asks, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Anxiety pools in your stomach as you realize you hadn’t really planned anything to say. You wanted to know why Theo had done what he did and if it was for or because of you. Cormac had been bothering you, yes, but it could have just been that Theo really disliked him and wanted to intervene. 

“Why did you do that?” you ask. Probably the worst way you could have asked that, but it was what came out. You might as well own it at this point. 

“Do what?” he mused.

“Why did you stop Cormac?”

“That feels like a dumb question. He was laying his hands on you without your permission.”

“Would you have done that for anyone, though?” you stuttered through your interrogation.

“I suppose not….why do you ask?” he asked, the smirk never leaving his face. Your eyes fell down to his lips suddenly, noticing that there was a small amount of dried blood stained across them. A small gasp left your lips as you reached your hand out. You didn’t think through any of the following movements; you just allowed your body to do as it pleased. Your fingers gently cradled his jaw, and your thumb swiped slowly over his lips, collecting the bit of staining as it crossed. Your eyes found him again, and you realized he was intently watching you. His eyes were softened by hunger. The way they traveled down to your lips, his lips parting as he found yours, his hands clenching by his side. It sent a chill down your spine. 

“Theo,” you breathed. You could not pull your eyes away from his swollen lips. You wanted so badly to learn their taste and memorize it for eternity. Just one kiss and you could be satisfied for the rest of your days. 

“I kicked Cormac’s ass because he was laying his hands on you, and I have been desperate to do that for years…,” he whispered. “The difference between him and I, though? I ask permission.” A glimpse of a chuckle spreads over his lips, and you feel your stomach blush with heat. As if he could feel it happen to you, his nose bumped softly against yours, igniting the heat and transforming it into a flame. 

“I want you so bad,” he whispered, the air skimming your lips. “Please let me have you.”

“Have me, Teddy.” Your response was final. His hands gripped each side of your face firmly and pressed your lips together. Heat and light and everything in between exploded into your stomach, sending shocks of love into your heart. You could have melted on the spot, and you nearly did, if it weren’t for Theo wrapping one arm tightly around your waist and holding you up.

His tongue slid over your bottom lip, begging for entrance. You granted him access to every part of you with no push-back. All you wanted was to feel him everywhere and never to lose that feeling ever again. 

The both of his hands pushed around the back of your thighs and pulled them to either side of his bent knees. He settled you neatly onto his lap, you straddling his thighs against the bed. The action sent a lightning bolt of pleasure directly to your core as the space between his thighs urged gently against you. You sighed against his mouth, entangling your fingers into his hair. 

Everything about him was overwhelming. His smell, his taste, and his touch had you gasping for air. You had never realized how much you truly wanted him until this very moment. Without so much as a breath, he cradled your back with one hand and stood from his bed, lifting the two of you into the air. You squeaked from the sudden movement but relaxed instantly when he settled you against his bed. 

His lips detached from yours and quickly made alliance with your jaw and then your neck. His head worked down the frame of your body, pressing open-mouthed kisses to every sliver of skin he could find. When he reached the waistline of your uniform skirt, he tapped his finger twice against the spot where your shirt was tucked in. You nodded so quickly, it was almost pathetic. He smirked and slipped his hands between the materials. He tugged your shirt out and began laying the same types of kisses over your bare stomach. You groaned at the feeling, noticing the ardor he placed into each press of his lips. You felt worshipped and it was addicting.

His eyes flicked up to find yours as he slowly pushed himself farther down, placing himself just in front of your core. Without question, your legs began to spread for him, allowing him access to anything he wanted. You just needed to feel him; you didn’t care what he did. 

Your eyes found his face once more and scanned over the entirety of it. A deep, sinister glance rested in his eyes, holstering a lust so dark, it almost frightened you. His lips were slightly parted in a teasing, smirking way, just waiting to place themselves against you once more. And his nose had…oh, it had begun to bleed again. You reached down and swiped your thumb beneath it, pushing the excess discharge away. A small twinge of guilt hit you again at the thought of Theo getting himself hurt for you.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, frowning at the sight before you.

“You never have to apologize to me,” he breathed, “you are perfect.” And with that, he’d flipped the edge of your skirt over your legs and sunk his face between them. His tongue found your core before you could even get a word out. A breathless moan spilled from your lips as your spine arched off the bed. Your hands immediately pushed down to wrap themselves in his curls, savoring every single swipe of his tongue. 

“So fucking good,” he moaned against you, the vibrations sending messages up to your very brain. You quaked beneath the feeling, your thighs shaking against the boy’s hold on them. It was nearly becoming too much. You weren’t going to last much longer. If he wanted to do something, he’d better get to it.

“Theo, I’m…c—”

“Not yet, baby,” he whispered, pressing two chaste kisses to the inside of your thighs. You could feel the wetness spread across his lips and chin smear against your flesh. You shuddered at the sensation. It definitely should not have turned you on as much as it just did. “I want it on my tongue.”

He separates himself from you and slides his hands beneath the crook of your knees. With a firm grip, he yanks you to the edge of the bed, where your hips are lying just over the curve. His hands find your hips and flip you over onto your stomach, careful to avoid hurting you in any way. Ever so gentle.

You could hear him kneel down again behind you. Your thighs shook in anticipation just before he pressed his lips back to you. His tongue swirled across you in the most delicate of motions, drawing every sound possible from your lips. Your fingers gripped the sheets as each of his movements drew you closer to the edge. You might finish any second. 

“Hey-o!” Mattheo’s voice came from just outside the door. You jumped up and glanced back at Theo as the both of you separated as fast as possible. Theo came up to sit beside you on the bed and made quick work of wiping his mouth off on his sleeve. You pulled your skirt back over your legs and stood at attention, waiting for the two boys to enter. Damn it. You had been so close. 

The two boys walked in, clutching a small vial of liquid. Mattheo raised it to show the two of them, both of whom quickly nodded, smiling innocently. Surely, they wouldn’t suspect anything of the two of you. You’d never really expressed any feelings toward the other before now. At least not publicly.

“Where do you want this?” Mattheo asked.

“If you would just take it to the bathroom, we’re headed in there so they can help me clean up the rest of the way.” Both of the other boys nodded and headed back out the way they came, moving toward the group bathroom. 

Just as they left, Theo slipped his hand beneath your skirt and traced his fingers along you, allowing one to insert itself to its hilt. You gasped sharply, trying your best to mute the sound. His hand began to pump against you, slowly rising in speed as he hit that perfect spot each time with ease. The sounds spilling from your lips became less and less controlled as he pushed you towards the edge, keeping you standing tall and refusing to let you lay back down on the bed.

“Come like this, baby,” he whispered. “Quickly, before they get back.” His finger pressed deeply up into you one last time, bruising the soft spot and forcing a rushing finish down on you. Your lips parted in a shocked moan as the proof of your end slipped down around Theo’s fingers. He worked you through the entirety of it, never tiring and never halting. He could do this all day. 

The sound of his friends heading back toward the dorm room pushed the two of you apart once again. Only this time, Theo had a telling, lustful expression imprinted on his face, and the remains of your ecstasy were still painted across his fingers. You swiped a hand between your thighs in an attempt to clean yourself off and brushed any concerns from Mattheo or Enzo off. The ‘Are you okay?’ and the ‘You guys look weird’ had nothing on the steel resolve the both of you kept planted on your faces. If Theo could fight someone for you, you could fight the urge to tell his friends he’d just let you fuck his face while they were out running an errand. Oh well, such is life. You laughed to yourself. 

[fandom-geek]

btw, the violinist in tmp 4? he's probably james smithson, of "founder of the smithsonian institute" fame

so what do we know about our violinist? he grew up in alnwick abbey, he was illegitimate and had legitimate full siblings, a father "certain of his celestial significance", and he has a nephew to whom he leaves his violin

and smithson? well, his father restored alnwick abbey in the 1750s, which was in ruins up until then. smithson was the only illegitimate child of any of the dukes there in the 1700s, which is when the statement is set

smithson also left his estate to his nephew after his death, with the condition that his fortune would establish the smithsonian institute if his nephew died without any children.

here's a point of divergence, however. in our timeline, smithson was a chemist and mineralogist. in tmagp's timeline, he was a violinist. however, as u/New_Helicopter836 pointed out to me on reddit, when smithson's body was disinterred by andrew graham bell, his right little finger was such that it suggests he played "the harpsichord, the piano, or a stringed instrument such as a violin"

looking at smithson's life, he left for university in 1782, so it's likely that tmagp 4 is set around the same time. it might be a bit earlier since the royal court orchestra moved from mannheim to munich in 1778 (putting smithson at about 13), it might be another point of divergence, or smithson is describing it this way to call back to its earlier significance. i'm not sure, but it's weird either way.

all that said, i'm not terribly sure why smithson describes his father (sir hugh smithson/percy, duke of northumberland) as "certain of his celestial significance", especially when the only other time he says celestial is to describe the violin's music. the user i mentioned before found that sir hugh, a major patron of architectural projects, had an observatory built, but i find smithson's language too specific. is his father an avatar too? mannheim is only a bit north of schwartzwald, after all, and this is about thirty years before tmag 23 where albrecht writes to jonah magnus.

let's look a little at smithson's bequest to found the smithsonian institute in the first place. smithson asked for it to be "an establishment for the increase and diffusion of knowledge among men". the magnus institute, notably, is described in the arg as a place of education, and it was founded in 1818. although smithson died in 1829 and his nephew in 1835, the original smithsonian (the columbian institute) was granted a charter by the us government in 1818.

the letter is strangely absent of any names for the violinist or his family, and i can't help but wonder if this is why. and if it is because this is smithson - is this related to why the magnus institute exists instead of the magnus archives? the smithsonian, before it was renamed, was originally granted a charter by the us govt in 1818 - the same year that the magnus institute was founded in tmagp.

this is set 30 years before we know anything of jonah magnus, at least in tmag, so is it possible that he persuaded smithson to fund his educational institute focusing on the supernatural? the changed course of smithson's life from scientist to supernatural violinist would certainly be conducive for that, not least to mention the strange absence of his fortune from his letter to his nephew.

[sleeplesssmoll]

Vertin's personality and traits based on in-game context.

Contains Spoilers.

Will update when I find more tidbits about our beloved Timekeeper.

Updated: March 15 2024

Vertin sucks at math.

Not much to say here. Although, this is another difference between her and Sonetto, who loves math. I hope they do something with this later because it'd be fun.

Vertin is 16 confirmed

While this isn't a personality trait, I did see some debate about her age since it wasn't officials stated until now and it was assumed through context. Prisoner in the Cave explicitly confirms her age. Vertin became Timekeeper when she was 12 and has been the the TK for the past 4 years.

Vertin is a pianist and a painter.

You can see a piano in the back of her office in the Suitcase by the window. It makes sense in regards to Vertin's musically inclined Arcanum. There's an easel and stool in her office too. She doesn't merely collect art, she creates it. Vertin also owns a camera (official artwork released) too and mentions her photography in the begining, so this isn't new but I thought I should add it.

Vertin's still playful under all her composure.

We know baby Vertin was a little menace, but we can still see a spark of that mischief in her later years. For example, Vertin slapping a fake mustache on Regulus to avoid Sonetto really captures this. We can tell from other characters' voice lines that Vertin will most likely play along with their shenanigans. She'll chirp like a bird in response to Rabies talking about his bird friends (Wilderness interaction). She'll help Sonetto during hide and seek (Wilderness). She watches movies with Eternity and An An Lee. X asks her for help with his projects. Going through her crew's voice lines really paints a better picture of how she interacts with others. The voice lines point to someone playful and curious when she's not in work mode.

Vertin was a gremlin.

Vertin's love language is giving.

We know baby Vertin loved to give gifts to a reluctant Sonetto, but that part of her still exists. She tried to grant everyone's last wishes during the 1929 Storm. We also know she gives Lilya alcohol as a gift upon her return from 1929. She is also very direct. We see her ask people what they want or what can she do for them throughout the story. To expand further, you could say she likes fulfilling people's desires instead of limiting it to material gifts. We can see more of instances of this during the Green Lake event, especially in the way she protects Jessica from the Foundation. She also tried to get Regulus funding for a ship. I love the Suitcase Dad meme, but it's rooted in nuggets of truth.

She was a crappy student, yet she was also a resourceful gremiln. Vertin never liked the institution! Honor student? Top of the class? Never. Teachers are filled with that "Godamnit Vertin" energy toward her too. I hope we see more gremlin energy in the future.

One-sided childhood friends.

Vertin is a collector.

Sonetto and Vertin were desk mates but Sonetto couldn't stand Vertin when they were kids. She even tried to avoid Vertin at times but Vertin persisted with her gifts. We can see this in the hallway scene. Sonetto's about to change routes to avoid Vertin but Vertin called out to her to give her a frog she caught. Kinda funny how Sonetto can't stand Vertin but also can't resist her when they were kids. Vertin and Matilda were actually closer back then. Well, at least until the tear gas incident. Sonetto changed after Vertin was hurt and the rascal wasn't around to bother her. I feel like this tidbit says a lot about Vertin and her influence on people.

Baby Vertin collected rocks, bugs, and frogs. Adult Vertin collects painting and mementos of people she's lost. Things were simpler as a kid.

Vertin is stronger than she looks.

She was a wild child and she's still got it years later. Vertin can run for long periods of time, endure injuries, and climb obstacles. That, and she's still essentially a child solider. We see her hold her own when she needs to fight solo doing stuff like dodging bullets. Sonetto and Matilda also exhibit these freakishly athletic traits, especially Sonetto.

Vertin befriends people in every Era, despite knowing she'll lose them.

Compared to the other children raised by the Foundation, Vertin's traveled the world and witnessed loss in every Era. This opens doors to a whole new set of questions. How did she change over time? How do the Arcanists she recruited before the story treat her? Did she have crushes in previous Eras? Were the oranges just as bitter? Vertin seems to get close to people very easily and doesn't build walls around herself despite the trauma. You'd think someone who's lost so much would stop trying to get close to people, but she doesn't.

Vertin is optimistic.

Even as a child, she was full of hope. It's why she fights for the future and is a core part of her personality. She needs to fight for all those she lost and stop the Storm from taking more lives.

Vertin gets quiet when embarrassed/shy.

She'll blush and fall silent, but she doesn't stammer or go all tsundere. We can see this in voice lines. Sonetto's high praises make her cover her face with her hands. Eternity gets a reaction out of her when she holds her hand. She also blushed when she received surprise smooch and fell silent.

Vertin has a unique scar on her back.

Vertin is a tactile person.

Arcana mentions the scar after Vertin was shot multiple times in the back by Schneider. It's a big scar and new theories about the scar are ongoing and interesting!

In several voice line interactions, Vertin is patting people's heads or holding their hands. Not all her crew mates are on board with it, some seem confused, and others play along. We can also see examples in story like her handing Sonetto a frog while gently grasping her hand or her taking Regulus's hand to lead her into the Suitcase. Here is a post with the evidence to back this claim.

Vertin sucks at arcanum but her deep understanding of arcanum is uncanny.

The story mentions her weak arcanum skills throughout the story. They really want you to remember this. Also, her arcanum didn't manifest until sometime after the break away event but before the events in the prologue. During her stay in the guardhouse, she doubts if she's even an arcanist and mentions her arcanum has yet to manifest, which is wild. Smoltin is fighting with her tiny hands and wit in this chapter. However, in the prologue it's mentioned Vertin's understanding of arcanum and her perception makes her unique amongst arcanists. She's also considered more "rationale" than other arcanists. You can read more about this here.

Vertin is stealthy.

Smoltin sneaks around to play outside. She steals food for herself and the Ring from the Staff Canteen, which has better quality food than what the kids get. This tells me she's done this before. Adult Vertin also sneaks around the Walden to find Schneider. She makes maps, tracks guard routes, and avoids detection since whe was a kid.

Tooth Fairy was one of the few Foundation members who cared about Vertin.

Tooth Fairy is the one who gave Smoltin the toffees (chit chat voicelines). She also covered for Vertin on a few occasions to protect her from punishment. She remembers Vertin faking her illness to skip class, but her bruises and wounds were real. The Foundation does have a few kind hearts that genuinely care about the children. The causes of Vertin's injuries is up to speculation.

[thethirdromana]

Modern-day jobs for Dracula characters

Yes, most Dracula characters already have jobs that still exist in the modern day: solicitor, doctor, teacher etc. But being in the modern day would have them make different choices so... what would they do instead?

Mina Harker: I don't really get the sense that Mina actually enjoys being a teacher; it's just a job that's available to her as an educated woman in the 1890s. What Mina does like: planning, order, timetables, schedules. Mina would be the best project manager you've ever met.

Jack Seward: Jack should not have a people-focused job, and he should be working with vulnerable people least of all. He's great at observation, and he loves to make a difference and be told that he's a good clever boy. Oh, and he's a big fan of up-to-the-minute technology too. We only need to change his career trajectory slightly, and he would be a very happy research scientist.

Arthur Holmwood: Not many British noblemen are able to live lives of idle luxury any more, so even if his family still owned the Ring estate, he would need to do something more to keep it going. Arthur likes people, travel, music, sport and the good life. So I think, like many modern-day noblemen, he would use the estate itself to generate income: hosting weddings, concerts, conferences and team-building days.

Lucy Westenra: Honestly I think Lucy would love the idea of working with Arthur on the estate. She'd hardly be getting married at 19 in 2023, but she might be getting a BA in Hotel and Hospitality Management with that future in mind.

Quincey Morris: What job does an adventurer/cowboy do in the 21st century? I can't imagine Quincey spending his days sitting at a desk. It needs to be something intense and physical, but also representative of a moment in time that isn't going to last. Quincey works on an oil rig.

Jonathan Harker: Tricky, because Jonathan is so defined by being a solicitor. But a modern-day Jonathan would have far more options for progressing in his career. He has a way with words and a kind and generous nature. I think he'd be an excellent charity grant writer.

Abraham van Helsing: I'm afraid there is no time period or universe in which Van Helsing M. D., D. Ph., D. Lit., etc., etc. is anything other than an academic.

[strawbeelemonade]

ROMANTIC HEADCANNONS: Hobart Brown

i don't know much about Hobbie, just what i've seen of him in the trailer. i think he's fun! :D this was made before the movie's come out by the way, so we're going off the barebones research ive done on the wiki and my silly brain impulses.

🕷- If Hobart has a crush on you, you will probably not know about it.

🕷- But there will be signs.

🕷- He doesn’t project a lot of his feelings on the surface. He keeps his cool in most cases. But you WILL get little smiles and hums occasionally.

🕷- When you mention you liked one of his guitar picks, he’ll give it to you.

🕷- He’s not afraid of eye contact, especially with you.

🕷- While he randomly practices he might catch you watching him in awe, and when your eyes meet he won’t look away.

🕷- He starts playing faster.

🕷- He’ll greet you first out of anyone in a group every time. Even if he has to walk passed someone else to say hi.

🕷- He seeks you out first and gives you a little “hey.”

🕷- If he’s sat and you come over he’ll pat the spot next to him.

🕷- “C’mere.”

🕷- Is comfortable sitting in complete silence.

🕷- If you you don’t have any spider powers and you guys have to run he will grab you.

🕷- No questions asked. YOINK.

🕷- His outfits are full of sharp edges and spikes, so he’s mindful. But there’s a sweet spot tucked right at his side with a space between his collar and jaw for your head to rest.

🕷- He likes it. Keep your head there.

🕷- He’s always coloured his nails in with sharpie, but If your lucky he might even let you do it.

🕷- If you have nail polish on hand he’ll let you paint his nails instead, which he ends up preferring the look of and might make the switch.

🕷- Polish is way messier, though. So he was hoping you’d do it whenever he sees you.

🕷- He’ll do yours. Give him your hand.

🕷- No matter how tall you are, Hobart will almost certainly be taller.

🕷- while holding a conversation he’ll get closer to you then he would with other people.

🕷- He’ll greet you by locking your fingers with his in a high five format… if that makes sense

🕷- His hands are huge, and unusually warm. You tell him it’s nice.

🕷- His reaction time is crazy, if a projectile is headed your way, and he can stop it? Best believe he’s gonna catch that shit. And chances are he’ll be close enough to you to just stick his arm in front of your face and stop it.

🕷- He will opt to stay close to you.

🕷- If you give him any band pins or patches he will put that on the front of his jacket. If there’s no room he’ll make some.

🕷- He has an affect on the emotional environment in a room.

🕷- If someone tries to intimidate or square up to him chances are they are gonna look pretty stupid. He’s just unbothered.

🕷- If someone tries to bother you he’ll let his presence be all the message they need to get lost. He won’t budge, no matter what. He’ll look out for you, Dw.

🕷- He will stand behind you and just watch them with this foul, unimpressed look on his face.

🕷- Canonically Hobart is super politically active, so his moral compass is strong. he stands up for what’s right and defends what he believes in. If he defends you, it will mean a lot.

🕷- If you’re anxious, scared or stressed you can hang out with him for maybe like 5 minutes and you’ll immediately feel better. He likes that you come to him for things like that.

🕷- You make him relax easily. You’ll have no idea, but you have a huge affect on him.

🕷- I can imagine he writes music in his free time, he might play a song or two for you if your interested…

🕷- He’ll get a little shy, so make sure to tell him how cool you think it is!!

🕷- You make him go shy more than you realise.

🕷- In his universe Hobart has canonically experienced homelessness, so basic amenities that you might take for granted mean a lot to him. He’ll share what he has with you, no matter how small of a thing it is.

🕷- If you packed a little lunch or grabbed a snack from somewhere and share some with him then he will smile a bit.

[chososluv]

BOYFRIEND!NANAMI

✎₊˚⊹♡ summary: part two of workhusband!nanami. fast forward where you two are in a serious relationship and unwind after a long stressful week the best way you two know how

✎〰 word count: 2.3k (something short sweet <3)

🏷 tags/warnings: fem!reader, reader has a vagina, soft sex, missionary sex, riding, squirting, creampie, petnames, slight size kink, nanami is pussy drunk and whipped by you, slight sub!reader, sort've proofread will edit later

Soft smells of jasmine and roses fill the air. Stresses of the day seaming to be irrelevant and minuscule the moment Nanami Kento laid his blond head on the satin pillows. His body settles into the thick duvet with an emissive thread count that seemed to relax those tense muscles of his generously. Those graphs, statistics, and metrics of work melt away from his brain, rending his brain blank with tranquility. It also wasn’t hard for him to fall in a state of relaxation when you — his beautiful lover — perch yourself on top of him. His eyes opening and falling into a tender expression the moment he saw your face looking down at him. He mirrors your lovestruck smile before he speaks.

"Missed you."

The honey smooth baritone of his voice causes your stomach to twist and set a cage of butterflies free. Your smile stretches across your lips and you place your palms on his broad chest. His usual navy shirt gone and in the dirty laundry basket. His skin is warm against your palms and your fingers are so dainty against his brute pecs. You bite your lip before digging your nails gently into his skin.

“Missed you more.” You reply back at him. He shifts under the feeling of your nails scratching against his skin. Nevertheless he ignored it and shifts his attention back to your angelic face. The same one he’s been deprived of all week since you two took on different projects and barely saw one another at work. The overtime to meet deadlines meant less time together and often times you two spoke only sparingly through text messages and funny enough those days seemed to be your worst days.

When your projects finally came to a close, Kento and you planned a night where you two would finally unwind with one another. The location selected was his apartment and he was pleased to find you had beaten him home. Letting yourself in with the key he had granted you five months in your relationship, his ears heard the soft sensual r&b music that echoed throughout his apartment. You met him by the door adorned in a scantily satin slip negligee that left Kento drooling. He found himself melting as you ridded him of his briefcase and then jacket. Your small hands worked to loosen his tie before unbuttoning his dress shirts. Kento grabs your hands, rough and broad fingers engulfing yours entirely. You look up at him the other hand touches the side of your face. He strokes his thumb tenderly before speaking.

“Want to see what you have planned.” He points to the roses on the ground that seem to indicate a path. You nodded as his thumb moved to your bottom lip. He presses against it and your tongue darts out to lick his thumb. He swore under his breath before you spoke.

“Mhmm, yes baby.”

The stresses of work seemingly slip away when you took his hand in yours led him to the dining area. A cooked meal and candle lights to add to the ambiance left Nanami grinning softly. He looks to you, taking in your hopeful expression as you awaited his reaction to your romantic dinner. It was cute. The effort you put in to make him feel special and he looks to you tiredly, however his grin stretches even wider.

“You’re perfect.” He said to you and you felt the relief and content flood through your body. You throw your arms around him, bringing him down to your height as you narrow the gap between the two of you. Your noses touch and you lean forward, placing your lips delicately on top of his to form like a puzzle. You two always fit together as if you were made for each other.

"Only for you." You said to him when you ceased your gentle kiss.

During your romantic dinner - to both of your surprises - you managed to keep your hands to yourselves. A verbal form of intimacy taking place as you both listened to each other's days tentatively. A part of your relationship both of you cherished just as deeply as the sexual intimacy you shared. Which speaking of . . .

Boyfriend!Nanami currently moves his hands up your satin slip, distracting you from your thoughts. You were caught up in Kento's stare as he continued to stare at you. Dinner is long over and in the present time you are still perched on his lap. You try to supress the shiver that ripples through you as he runs his fingers along your thighs. Goosebumps are left in his wake, trailing as he continues traveling up your nightgown. Your cunt begins to tingle when he presses his fingers against your bare pelvis, finding that you were completely nude this whole time.

"No underwear?" He questions, raising an eyebrow and you only held his stare. You lick your lips before replying, deciding on your reply.

"Didn't think you would make it past dinner." You tease and he chuckles briefly. His fingers trail along your hips before traveling back down your leg again. His fingers fully emerge and he circles his hands once more, retreating back underneath the slip and up your leg.

"What do I get for behaving?" A look shifts in his eyes, something dark and a bit carnal but it awakens something inside you too. You were waiting for this Kento to emerge and now that he did you fought against curling your toes. You easily submitted to him but tonight, you wanted to something different.

"Something like this..." You say before leaning down. His eyes flicker from yours to your lips, his hand back on your pelvis. He teasingly slips it down, pretending he's about to touch where you wanted him most. Your breathing hitches, but sick of the teasing, you lean forward and crash your lips to his. He greets you hungrily, devouring and kissing on your lips he missed greatly. Your breath evades your lungs as you melt into a bliss only love could craft.

Boyfriend!Nanami sweats at his hairline when you ride him. Completely ridded of your clothes, he holds tightly onto your waist as you roll and rock your hips at a rhythm that has Kento winded. He's grunting, cursing, and moaning while digging his blunt nails into your side. You're no better. You moan loudly as his length kisses your soaking, yet tight, walls. The stretch is delicious, carnal even, but you both fall deep into euphoria. The explicit sounds of your wet cunt slapping back down against his balls left squelching that would have satan blushing.

"So big!" You praise Kento and he grunts at your praise. His eyes are looking you all over as he watches you ride him. Your breasts are shaking with each motion of your hips and your face contorted into a countenance of bliss. Kento can only drink in the sight as he watched you continue to mount him like ride him like a professional. He never had anyone make him feel this good the way you do.

"Taking me so good." He huffs out and you only whimper. Your thighs are burning but that sensation that arises each time you sink your hips back down has you rutting desperately. Kento sees it and he can only bite his lip before he's sitting up. You mewl wrapping your arms around his neck, bringing his skin to touch yours and the temperature skyrockets. You opt to roll your hips, letting him slide out before taking him back in. The pace becoming languid and the change of tempo causing you both to moan against each other's lips. He wraps his arms around your waist, bringing you close to him.

"Good girls get your cum." You say, submissive side becoming fucked out of you and Nanami felt his stomach tighten at your words. He can only smirk, noticing the switch in behavior but something is still tender behind that cocky smirk.

"Taught you so well." Nanami says before squeezing his arms tighter around your body before lifting you up and down on his cock. The second switch in rhythm and exhibition of his strength left you gushing, creaming around his cock as he continued bounce you up and down on his cock. Kento listens to your moans and mewls in pleasure, this fueling him to continue to lift you up and down.

"Kento!" You're whimpering, attempting to warn him but only a mixture of curses leave your mouth before a sudden gush of liquid wets his thighs. Nanami swears, stopping his lifting to look down to see you squirting all over his lap.

"Fuck, this pussy is leaky tonight, hmm?" He says before lifting you off his cock. You whine at the loss but he ignores you, placing you on the bed next to him. You flop onto your back as he quickly adjusts himself between your legs before you can register it. He separates your thighs and gives no warning when he dives in, taking your swollen clit in his salivating mouth.

English does not leave your mouth as you throw your head back into the pillows. His tongue performing sloppy circles and shapes to evoke more croons of pleasure from you. You continue moaning, crying out as his tongue figure 8s back and forth between your soaking hole and beating clit. He moans between your legs, savoring your taste on his tongue. He looks up at you between your legs and has to fist his cock at the sight. Your breasts are in the air due to your dramatic back arch and he groans.

"Kento!" You're shouting and he only continues to eat your cunt. His chin is coated in you and you can only imagine how wet the sheets are beneath you. Your mind would come to that realization later but right now you're too consumed with the way your boyfriend sucks on your lips as he continues to make up for lost time.

"Could live between these thighs." He admits, taking a pause to sink his fingers in, moving away from fisting his cock and he groans at the warmth hugging him. You mewl, remembering what penetration felt like and suddenly you need him back in you. You grab his wrist along with his attention as you do. He looks at you worriedly and you speak.

"I need you back in me, please baby." You beg, pleading with a pitiful look in your eye and he can't say no. He's giving you a kiss on your thighs before giving into your commands . . .

Boyfriend!Nanami who holds both your wrists with one hand as he takes you missionary. Your thighs are wrapped tightly around his waist, squeezing harshly as he continues to roll his hips into you. The lewd noises of your drenched cunt and pathetic whines left Nanami groaning in your neck. He’s so in love with you and he loves hearing your cries for him to keep going. He would only give in to his sweet little work wife who writhed pitifully beneath him. Something about your frame underneath his brute one, taking you in the most intimate position causes his toes to curl. He ruts desperately in you, causing you to squeal at the frantic pace. His tip kisses the deepest parts of you, earning more leaks from your cunt and high pitched whines. All of it was music to his ears.

“I’m gonna cum—” You choke on a whine and he only rutted harder. You whimper, sighing as you felt your orgasm seconds away from crashing into you. Kento was only so far behind, sweating and balls twitching at every sad little whimper that escaped from your swollen lips. He is so enamored he moves his head from your neck to look you over. Your face before him has him gripping your wrist harder as he drinks in your ruined expression. His sweet work wife who turned into the absolute most important person in his life. It’s you and only you he would happily give up his life if it meant to save you from anything cruel in the world. He wipes a tear off your cheek with his free hand before speaking tenderly.

“So pretty falling apart under me.” He comments, pressing your wrists harder into the mattress as his grip somehow manages to get even tighter. You only mewl, lifting your hips to meet his strokes to get him to go deeper.

“Love your cock so much. I wanna cum, Kento.” You plea, asking for permission and he hums. He leans down, kissing your forehead as you huff, fighting to hold off on your orgasm before you heard him grant permission. Your cunt was clenching, pulsating around him and he was struggling to hold back from busting inside you then. However, he keeps his composure and smiles against your forehead before speaking.

“Go ahead and cum for me, honey." He grants the permission you sought out and like magic you feel that wave crash into you. White and hot bliss shoots through you and you let out a howl of pleasure as your cunt sucked on Nanami's cock. He moans, groaning as he feels his load spilling messily inside you. He ruts hard, letting your tight cunt milk him every last drop. The load he's been building and waiting to pump you fill with since the separation between you two. He's moaning loudly and the noise sends butterflies to your belly. The sound so sexy as your boyfriend cums loudly inside you.

"I love you." You sigh as he slides out of your cunt slowly. He looks down at you, letting go of your wrist and you immediately wrap your arms around him. He chuckles at your limbs wrapped around him and he only moves to kiss your cheek.

"I love you too, darling."

©chososluv 📓☕︎♫₊˚.🎧 ✩｡ ╰┈┈➤ MASTERLIST!

[cynical-ghost]

YEARS AND YEARS

Paring: Charles Leclerc x Fem!Reader.

Genre: One-shot, fluff, secret relationship, friends to lovers.

Warning(s): use of Yn.

Synopsis: They had been friends since they were young, but soon that become more and people started noticing.

A/n: my first one-shot! Sorry if it’s bad, I didn’t know where this was going - not proofread.

Yn Ln had been brought up around racing, she attended every race she could and participated in karting when she was younger. The Ln girl enjoyed her time racing against others and the adrenaline it granted her, but as she grew older she drifted from the race track and moved on to other things.

She still had a passion for racing, even if she wasn’t the one in the drivers seat.

Yn still stayed in contact with her racing friends, they often met up and participated in fun activities or just had chilled out movie nights in one another’s apartments.

The friendship she had with Charles Leclerc had always been a close one, her family had moved from England to their holiday apartment in Monaco when she was four years old to give her a better chance at a racing career when she had expressed her passion for the fast paced sport.

She attended the same school as the boy and they quickly became friends after bonding over their love for racing. The two children had ran over to their parents after school and told them about their newfound friendship which led to play dates and days out for the two families.

As they grew older they became more and more competitive and gained a friendly on track rivalry.

When Yn turned sixteen she started exploring other fields of work such as modelling and music. The time she had reserved for Karting decreased, while her friends were being scouted for bigger racing opportunities like Formula 2

By the time she was eighteen she had stopped racing altogether, spending all her time working on other projects. Charles and herself were still very close, though they did things that usually would not be put in the friendship category.

Every time someone would see them they would always be touching, ether holding hands or sharing to-long hugs. When someone would call the two nineteen year olds out on it they would deny the accusation of them being in a relationship.

The to-long hugs soon progressed into quick, secretive kisses in hidden places, and the hand holding became a permanent attachment.

Their friends shared amused glances with each other whenever they saw the two together (which was all the time), The group of racing drivers and their respective partners came together and devised a plan that would hopefully get the ‘friends’ to spill their not so secret relationship.

~~~~~~~~~~<><><><~~~~~~~<><><><~~~~~~~~~~

Yn Ln was in Ferrari hospitality getting herself a quick snack to eat while watching the race, as she walked out of the building with her Jaffa cakes and a bottle of cherry Pepsi in her hands she was stopped by Max Verstappen as she passed by the Redbull garage as she wandered about to pass the time.

“Yn!” The voice of the man dressed in navy blue called out to her, her head whipped to where the shout of her name had came from.

When the woman saw it was her friend Max a smile tugged at her glossy lips, “Max, shouldn’t you be getting ready for the race?” She asked with a tilt of her head, her words coated with the slightest accent.

The man looked over his shoulder quickly, making eye contact with Kelly, before looking back at the person standing in front of him waiting for a response.

“I am, I just wanted to ask if you and Charles wanted to join me and the others for a few drinks at our hotel.” He asked. “Everyone is coming, it would be a shame if you guys didn’t.” He added, looking over at Lando who was walking by.

The man in papaya smiled cheekily and waved at the two, before running off to his garage so he wouldn’t be late for the start of the race.

“Sure, thanks Max.” Was her quick reply, she always enjoyed when the group got together and had a laugh.

The racing driver bid her goodbye as he strode back over to the team of mechanics.

The race had been a good one, Max coming in at P1 and Charles P2 with Lando joining them on the podium with P3.

After the team celebrations and a quick trip home for outfit changes, Yn and Charles were on their way to Max and Kelly’s hotel, they were both ready to wind down after the busy and successful day they had surrounded by their friends.

They were greeted by the other racers and their parters who had also been invited with hugs and congratulations in Charles’ case.

The group huddled together to get comfortable on the double bed and the few chairs around the room and started to watch a generic action movie picked by one of the racers.

The movie was about an hour in when the snacks that had been brought for the movie night looked to have been ravaged by a pack of wild animals, some of the packaging had even been ripped to pieces by Lando and Carlos who fought to get the last Reece’s (Lando won).

“We need more food.” Lando whined, throwing his head back to look at the others from his place on the carpeted floor.

Oscar nodded in agreement and looked to his girlfriend Lily, who was tucked into his side, to see if she wanted anything, she requested a drink quietly to him, still focused on the movie playing on screen.

“We could go for a few bottles of Coke and a some of chips.” The McLaren driver added his own order to the group.

Everyone looked at each other as to determine who would leave the confort of the hotel room to go and buy the requested food and drink. Soon every pair of eyes except for two landed on Yn and Charles who were cuddled up on a tucked away loveseat.

Yn sighed before standing up to stretch her back “Fine, fine we’re going.” Her voice came out ragged due to tiredness and having not been used for a while.

Charles look up at her from his spot on the couch, the two seemed to be having a conversation with their eyes before he too joined her in standing up.

“We’ll be back soon.” The man stated, his words thick with accent due to lack of use.

As the two left the room, quiet chatter started behind the closed door.

“Did you see the way they were cuddling! They can’t keep denying they are together if they are doing things like that in front of people.” Lando started in a whispered exclamation.

Carlos nodded, agreeing with the McLaren driver, “I noticed that too, they were clinging onto each other since the movie started.”

Charles and Yn walked alongside each other, a bag full of snacks and beverages carried by the man. They had been stopped a few times to take pictures with fans along the way.

“Do you think we are being to obvious?” Yn asked quietly as to not be heard by passers by.

Charles thought for a moment before answering in an equally as quiet voice, “maybe, but do you think it’s time to tell them? I mean we have been dating for almost three years.”

“We should probably tell them.” Yn mumbled, she hadn’t realised it had been so long since they had started dating, times flys when your having fun I guess.

The two reached the hotel room, stopping outside the door to go over the plan to tell their friends they have been together for as long as they have been.

Leclerc and Ln walked in with their hands clasped together. “We have something to tell you all” Charles started.

The group inside the room looked at their hands and glanced at each other. “Is it they you two are dating?” Lando blurted earning wide eye looks from the couple.

“Uh-yeh, yeh we hav-.” The two stumbled over their words having not realised their friends had caught on.

Max let out a wheeze at the sight of their caught out faces, Kelly softly hitting the back of his head before letting out a chuckle herself which caused the rest of the group to laugh at the pair still stood by the door.

Yn and Charles gave a sigh of relief at not having to tell the group of drivers and parters themselves, rolling their eyes at the laughing figures of their friends.

As the laughter sobered up max spoke up “so how long of you two actually been together?” The others staring at them intently also wanting to know.

“Three years….”Charles coughed out.

“Jesus!”

“Did you just forget to tell us or something?!”

Were some of the outraged answers from their close friends. Max looked at Yn’s face and realised that that was actually what had happened. “You really forgot to tell us didn’t you?” He laughed out.

Embarrassed nods were all he got from the pair.

[p1utofairy]

PAC🎱

“don't change i like the way you make me feel. can we take our time and do this for awhile?”

• what will their first impression be of you?

disclaimer ✩: 18+ mature themes. take what resonates, leave what doesn't. it's been a minute y'all <3 i've been a bit busy but here's something new to show my appreciation for the constant love and support. ILY!

PILE ONE.

hello, pile 1. i don't know why i have the urge to start your reading off so professional but i feel like your energy reads “come correct or don’t come at all.” OOO okay i respect it! i’m already picking up that your person may feel like you’re out of their league…or their friends might tease them and say that you are. ballin’ by partynextdoor is playing, “i’m out of your league, baby. baby 'cause i’m ballin' for a minute.” i can see your person watching you from a distance, you’re surrounded by your friends laughing and talking, and their friend comes up next to them and says “[Y/N] is totally out of your league!” this may not even be a friend of theirs lol this could totally just be a hater being annoying but people definitely deem you as the perfect catch. your beauty is otherworldly i’m hearing, people constantly steal glances and are in complete awe of your beauty/the way you carry yourself. majority of you that chose this pile are deeply in tune with your feminine side and you like the finer things in life. “diamonds are a girl’s best friend!” is what i’m hearing — also 7 rings by ariana grande/my favorite things from the sound of the music. yeah y’all are it girls for sure! i think they’ll be a bit intimidated and nervous to approach you at first pile 1…they'll definitely be in their head a lot. their thoughts will be so all over the place like “WHAT IF [Y/N] doesn't like me?! or WHAT IF [Y/N] doesn't give me a chance!?" lol but once they finally do muster up the courage to approach you?! it's a wrap! i think that you'll like the way that they try to woo you, it'll be different from the way other people try to get your attention. however, i think that it will take them a while to actually make a move because they fear rejection. once they get out of their own head and take the leap, they'll realize that there was no need to stress in the first place because they peaked your interest all along. they definitely see you as high-value and very classy pile 1. they'll treat you with the utmost respect and go the extra mile to court you the way that you deserve to be. they will not take you for granted. not only do they think that you’re absolutely stunning, but they also admire how you have the brains and wit to match. i also think that visually you two will look very good together, it’s giving power couple vibes. when you pop out with them heads definitely will turn cause i think y’all both match each other’s fly very well — ugh yes!

other channeled messages:

could be younger than you, mama’s boy, dream girl, g.o.a.t by eric bellinger ft. aroc, lil boo thang by paul russell, air sign venus, you make me feel so young by frank sinatra

PILE TWO.

hi pile 222! i'm ngl i keep hearing that tiktok sound of that flo milli song that goes "he speedin’ the wraith while his hand on my coochie, he touchin’ emilio pucci." LOLOLOL maybe y'all like that song or you keep seeing tiktok edits with it playing? idk that was random but i feel like it's also your vibe? you have this sultry/seductress vibe but you have such a cute face i'm hearing, i think people may not expect this from you. i’m picking up that some people project onto you a lot and have this expectation/idea of how you should be/should act which is weird…people may have started rumors about you or said you had sex with someone that you didn't. ugh you definitely have undercover haters and i'm also picking up that some of you get sexualized a lot :( you feel misunderstood a lot of the time and people don't realize that there's more to you than what meets the surface. i think that your person may hear of the rumors but won't pay them much mind…they want to get to know you for themselves. they'll think that you're very ambitious, kind-hearted and smart! you have big dreams and they admire how motivated you are to achieve them — it's inspiring to them! you have a zest for life and you know how to turn a negative into a positive, so despite what anyone has to say about you…you'll always succeed and have the last laugh. ngl this turns your person on??!?!?! OMFG I'M CRYING. your person is also very dedicated and passionate so the fact that you match their energy will have them feeling some type of wayyyyy like they want you bad pile 2. they definitely see you as the ultimate trophy like they want nobody else but you, this isn't in a superficial way either…they just love how you never fold under pressure. they love that you can hold your own and you don't need anyone to validate you, including them. they never met someone like you before pile 2, they feel like you're a rare find. like you by bow wow ft. ciara is coming to mind. YEAHHH IT'S VERY MUCH THAT.

other channeled messages:

nyc, baby it's cold outside, agora hills by doja cat, smoking weed, retail job, scorpio, fire signs (esp leo & sag), milkshake by kelis

PILE THREE.

hey pile 3! right away i’m already feeling that your person will think that you're hard to catch or too hot to handle…something along those lines. they'll feel like you’re hard to obtain, you might be very private/incognito so they don't know how to reach you. incognito in the sense that you don't post a lot on social media or you don't go out to parties/clubs much, you’re like a mystery. you value your privacy and personal space a lot (and there's nothing wrong with that) but just know this might make it a bit difficult for your person to approach you. i think that you have very high standards and you will not settle for less or compromise any of your personal needs/desires for a situation you know is not worth your time. i don't know…i feel like you might curve this person initially — you may not feel like you're in the right headspace or are in the right capacity to handle a relationship with this person at the time that they reach out or approach you. for some that chose this pile, this could be an old-flame trying to spin the block again but i don't think you'll be very receptive to the idea of giving them another chance. this person is willing to wait and give you the space that you need until you figure out if you want something more with them or not. i think you're more so focused on healing your inner child and pouring love back into yourself pile 3 which is absolutely beautiful, keep going! it's all going to work out in your favor in the long run. a similar dynamic that i pick up between you and this person is elizabeth bennett and mr. darcy from ‘pride and prejudice’ for those of you that watched the movie, you know how it took a good amount of time before they finally got together — but that slow burn/build up between them was sooooo worth it. i think that once you feel ready, this relationship will bloom into something so beautiful, passionate and intricate — something only you two will ever understand but ultimately it's up to you pile 3!

other channeled messages:

u with me? by drake, yearning for your love, long distance, passive aggressive, i made some mistakes, back and forth text messages, mind games

[moncherellie]

the red line (+ ai audios)

a/n: this one is inspired by the song cherry by rina sawayama. that drives me wack every time i hear it. rina u are a genius. requests still open :) i hope this is reminiscent of a first love/first girl crush. i sure projected here LMAO

-content/warnings: 4k words, kinda loser! ellie x loser! reader (pining pining pining), fem reader, lots of awkward flirting, reader has slight anxiety/overthinks, reader's first gay relationship, fleeting mentions of drug use/creepy dudes/homophobia

Moving from your small Midwestern town to the East Coast was a whirlwind of culture shock and nerves. The people in your town were tooth-achingly sweet, while East Coast people were straightforward enough to induce whiplash. The air seemed smog-clogged compared to the untouched crispness of a rural day, occasionally choking when you open your window in the morning and making the mistake of inhaling too deeply. But while the honeyed grass fields and clear cerulean skies of Wisconsin would always hold a fond place in your heart, its fresh air couldn’t compare to the refreshing feeling of a big city. Sure, people in your hometown were nice, but there was always an underlying threat of conformity- the asphyxiation of green grass lawns, American flags, and fishing trips was finally released when you entered Boston, your new home. 

You’d only been here a few days, moving into your apartment and getting to know the neighborhood, so there’d been no time to explore the broader city. At least, that was the excuse you’d use. A couple friends had called and urged you to take photos for them, saying that they were trapped at home and you were the only one who’d escaped the town. You’d type a short lol come with, but you needed to settle at your own pace. This was why, on the fifth day, you’d decided to traverse across the entire city to find a music store called “The Boston Beat” that caught your eye on Yelp. 4.3 stars, a fair selection of mainstream records and indie music, and a pride flag in the window, which was a welcome change of pace. You had a day plan.

You’d marched up to the light rail station, bought a card, and charged it with a day pass, unready to commit to the investment of a monthly pass. While not experienced with subway prices, 90 bucks seemed insane. You’d see if it was a worthy investment depending on the experience you’d have today. 

It was a hot August day- waves of heat warped your vision when radiating off the dark cement, metal fixtures stinging your hands when touched. The inside of the station was no better, muggy and dank. You found a strange comfort in it, the city becoming more human by the minute. You were surprised at how intuitive the subway had been so far, and you were gaining confidence with every step. Maybe you are cut out for this city shit. You step up to the entrance. Moment of truth. You swipe and arrogantly attempt to walk through, only to run into the locked turnstile. You had never been so immediately humbled. Well, fuck.

Swipe again. The card reader’s red light doesn’t falter. Swipe again. Still nothing. Swipe, swipe, swipe. The hell? You wiggle the turnstile, face heating as people start to group behind you. Fuckfuckfuckfuck- 

“Fucking… go… swipe through, shitass card.” You mutter, already emotionally drained from the eyes on you. Someone side-eyes you as they enter the stall next to you with ease, and you give them an apologetic, wide-eyed smile. I’m never leaving the house again, you think. You move to shove at the turnstile again, assuming that if you did nothing differently, the result would change. And you were… right?

“Fuck yeah! I’m so good.” You congratulate yourself for figuring it out, and you hear a low chuckle behind you. A tattooed arm holds a scraped and folded, worn-to-hell Charlie card. The slim fingers holding it are calloused but well-manicured, nimbly swiping the card again to let themselves through. You look up to see who pitied you enough to grant you entrance, and you’re surprised to see a pretty girl with auburn hair pulled up in a half-up-half-down do. Little pieces stick out of the sides, ends curling up and down wildly, short choppy hair framing her slender neck. Her face is wholly amused, lips curving into a small smirk and freckles shifting across her nose she smiles at you. She’s already incredibly attractive, but her eyes- God. Green and intense, reminding you of the duckweed coating the ponds at home. Like a Pollock of greens, browns, and flecks of yellow, her eyes meet yours as she holds up her card in two fingers, waving it in front of her face. She has a well-loved hair tie on her wrist. 

“Go through before it locks.” She chides. Your cheeks heat and you nervously laugh before pushing through. Beads of sweat stick to your face and neck, but you’re not sure if it’s from the summer heat or the embarrassment. The girl meets you on the other side and you fidget with the front edge of your tank top.

“Uhm, thanks for that. Was beginning to think I’d entered purgatory with all those people behind me.” You awkwardly joke, rifling through your bag. “I have cash, I can pay you for that-”

“Y’ don’t need to, it’s like two bucks. I’m a starving college student but I’m not that strapped for cash.” She glances at your jittering body, looking you directly into your eyes for the second time. Does she want to give you a heart attack? “You new or something? You don’t look like you’re from around here.”

You groan in response. “It’s that obvious?” The pretty stranger laughs.

“Not really. Maybe I’m more observant than most. Don’t sweat it, newbie, these stations are fucked up. It probably wasn’t your fault.”

“You sure?”

“Ah, you’re right- on second thought, maybe the MTA just hates you specifically.” She jokes, and you laugh. You’re straggling near the entrance, swaying around as you make small talk with her. 

“I wouldn’t put it past them, I’m shit with directions. They probably want to keep me off the trains at all costs.” You joke right back at her, and she chuckles again. Her laugh is pretty. Her smile is pretty. It’s a little cocky, but somehow in a chill way. Anyway, you figure it suits her. 

“Well, if you’re that bad, tell me where you’re going. Maybe I can help.” She offers. You tell her about The Boston Beat on the other side of the city, and her eyes twinkle. “Yo, no kidding. I work there. I’m off today, but I totally know where that is. It’s along the red line, here.” She leads you over to a scratched mess of a sign and points to where you can faintly make out a red path. “We’re here, you wanna get-” she stretches her arm out, “here.” She tells you which stop to get off at.

You thank her profusely and say goodbye. You head left towards the rail she told you to take, and to your mortification, she goes the same direction. Saying bye when she’s going the same way, stupid. You walk a little faster when you notice this, attempting to awkwardly force more space between the two of you. It’s fine, it’s fine. I’m just being silly- she doesn’t care! She’s not thinking about it! I’m just overthinking it.

Ellie, strolling behind you, actually is thinking about it. She watches as you speed-walk away, juxtaposing the way she casually strolls to lean against a support beam. Something about how you fidget and stutter was weirdly charming. Huh. She keeps staring.

You can tell someone’s watching you, but you assume that, as usual, it’s a gross old man. Your eyes come up, scanning the platform suspiciously for whichever creep you’ll have to tell off, but you make eye contact, again, with the pretty girl from earlier. Why was there so much eye contact? It was so nerve-wracking, but also… so exhilarating. The moment your eyes meet hers, she smiles, eyes crinkling. You immediately avert your gaze, breath catching.

A beat passes. You take your phone out and scroll the home screen for a minute. Open the compass app. Open the stocks app. Wow, how interesting. She’s probably not looking now, right? You sneak a glance, and she’s still looking. You don’t know if she stares out of disdain or curiosity. Thankfully, the speakers tell you to step away from the edge of the platform, alerting you of the oncoming vehicle. My saving grace, you think. You bounce on your heels as the subway train pulls up, and you take one last look at the girl. She’s looking away. Strands of brown hair move in the train’s wind, falling out of her bun, her side profile looking perfect in a somehow rugged way. Her oversized army green jacket folds and bends as she tucks her hair back and pulls her headphones on to block out the world. You find yourself wondering what she’s listening to. Maybe dad rock or riotgrrl.

You step into the car in front of you, feeling a strange ache deep within you that you can’t quite explain. Oh well. 

By the end of the day, the pretty girl from the subway station is out of your mind. You’ll never see her again, so there’s no point in mulling over it. You enjoyed your day of exploration, and Boston has left a very favorable impression so far. Today felt like self-care. Maybe you’ll do this next week, too.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

You’re working 2 part-time jobs to make ends meet. The first is a morning shift at a millennial coffee shop with eggshell walls, exposed brick, wood accents, and Hobby Lobby cursive signs saying “Don’t talk to me til’ I’ve had my espresso”. It pays decently, mostly because it’s busy as hell, but you’re getting tired of making a “grande”. You don’t have grandes, you’re not Starbucks. The second job is at a tour service. You’re always bored and you hate being surrounded by American history merch, but at least you’re in A/C. The coffee shop is just a block from your apartment, so it’s not much of a walk. The tour is 4 stops away on the subway.

Months go by. It’s October. Every Sunday, Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, you take the red line to your second job. And every Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday, you see her. The handsome girl with the generous subway card. 

Sometimes, you’re in the same car. You’ll glance up from your phone every so often, eyes raking over her. Everything about her tells a story. She always has a Jansport backpack and dirty black Converse. She dresses pretty masculine. Every Thursday, she carries a guitar with deep red paint and lacquer peeling off in chips, crumbling onto the floor. You wonder if she plays well. She argues on the phone with someone named Joel, but their conversations end in stubbornly grumbled “love you”s every time. Often, she wears that dark green jacket you met her in. You’ve been able to examine it a little more: it has some grease stains and says “Joel” on the front. Whoever he is to her, he’s probably some kind of mechanic. She’s always a little more tired than the day before. Sometimes you lay in bed and wonder if you’re some kind of creepy stalker. If you’re obsessed. No, you reason, she just looks cool. 

Across the train tracks, Ellie lies in bed, looking at the flags and banners on her ceiling, and she wonders the same thing. Is it weird that I’m disappointed when I don’t see her? Is it strange that I recognize her wardrobe? Your clothes tell a lot about you. You weren’t very confident when you talked to her, but by the manner in which you dressed, you had a good understanding of who you were, and even if you were slightly unconventional in some ways, you had no problem with showing your authentic self. That was something Ellie admired. You always had this… look in your eyes. Somehow hopeful and content, even though you were just riding on a dirty, shaky train to a dead-end job. It reminded Ellie of when she was a kid and had that same expression in Joel’s old pictures. You always had the same bracelet on. She wonders what it means to you, if it was a gift from someone you love.

There’s a silent understanding between the two of you. If you happen to make eye contact, it’s not unwelcome. You give her a smile and a small wave, and she offers a tight-lipped grin. One time, she awkwardly pretended to tip an invisible hat and immediately cringed at herself. She scrunched up her face and muttered “Why would I do that?”, swearing at herself. It was cute. You laughed a little, and she smiled, flustered. Apart from the few interactions you’d daydream about as you went through your monotone days, you hadn’t talked to the girl again. 

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

In an effort to stop being such a hopeless, pining loser, you downloaded Tinder to go on some casual dates. You’d gone on two, both girls being alright, but having no particular connection. But this last girl seemed relatively cool. Her name was Cat, and you’d opened with some line asking how many people made pussy jokes about her name. She’d responded well, and the two of you scheduled a date for 10 on a Sunday night. 

So why was it 11, and she still wasn’t showing? You’d ordered your red wine, then ordered water, then another wine, and there was no Cat to be found. The waiter would come around every so often and ask if you needed anything. There was an underlying tone of pity. The longer you sat alone, the more judging eyes you felt on you- after all, who sits alone at a table with two place settings? The waiter probably should’ve kicked you out a while ago, you think, wallowing in your emotions. 

You paid the bill and left after the staff offered a free slice of pie. That had sent you over the edge, tears pricking at your eyes as you thankfully wove your hands around. “That’s really so sweet, thank you guys so much, I’m okay, I really am, but I really appreciate this. You don’t know how much that means.” The rambling certainly didn’t help your appearance, but you really were grateful.

With a to-go box and an overreactive text to Cat, you left the restaurant, dragging the roses you’d brought for the date. You drudge to the red line, and you overthink as you wait for the train. The thoughts are entirely unreasonable, and you know this, but you let yourself have it—a little self-deprecation, as a treat.

The train is mostly empty, save for someone huddled in the corner. You’ve got quite a way to go to get home, and the first few stops feel torturously slow. About a quarter way through your ride-of-shame, someone boards the train. You avert your eyes as they do, not wanting to draw attention to how goddamn pathetic you feel. From the corner of your eye, you see them approach. The fuck? Am I gonna get stabbed? 

But you recognize those shabby Converse and the worn bottom of a guitar case. You look up to see the girl you’d been trying to get over, looking absolutely radiant in the disgustingly unflattering yellow light of the train. You follow her movements as she sits down right next to you, feeling absolutely entranced. Your gaze glances over her cute nose, the silver jewelry on her ear, and how two of her nails are cut too close to the flesh while the others are grown out. She clears her throat.

“So… you okay?” Her voice is a little hoarse, and it sounds like she’s been talking all day. She’s probably tired. You don’t usually see her on Sundays, so you wonder why she’s out. Her eyes are dark and tinted a little purple on the under-eye, but she stares at you like she genuinely wants to listen.

You realize you’ve been staring long enough to make it weird. “Um- yeah, I just- yeah. I’m good.” You throw up a pathetic thumbs-up. Jesus. That was… awful.

She smiles. “Say it again, but mean it this time.” You laugh a little.

“I look like I was mugged, huh?”

“No. You look nice. A little sad though. So what happened?” 

“I got stood up. It’s alright though, I wasn’t that into her.”

“Was she a dry texter or some kind of weirdo?” She says, and you chuckle.

As you lament to her about the no-show-Tinder-date, she listens intently, leaning forward as she nods along. Every so often she scoffs as you describe Cat, as if this stranger is your best friend spilling drama with you. It’s easy to talk to her when she acts so familiar with you.

“You fucking kidding? You bought her flowers and shit and offered to pay and she still didn’t show up?”

“Mhm.”

“That’s bullshit. You sound like the ideal date, honestly. Her loss.” Ellie cringes again. Could she have come on any stronger? Thankfully, it doesn’t seem like you mind, chuckling a little.

“I don’t know about all that, but thanks.” It’s quiet for a little, not awkward, but both of you can tell the other wants to keep talking. You decide to take the first leap. Maybe the fact that your subway girl is here is a sign from the universe. “So, I don’t usually see you on Sundays. Got your guitar with you. You do something fun?” You berate yourself internally- you know when you see her? Stalker, much?

She bashfully tells you that she went to an open mic in a Cambridge bar. “It was a little weird since I’m new to having an audience n’ all. I usually bring my guitar to work to practice, but that’s it.”

Your face lights up excitedly. “Hey, that’s so cool! I bet you did great.” Ellie holds in a smile, lips twitching upward as she tries to deflect the compliment.

“I guess I was okay. A little stiff, maybe.” You playfully hit her arm. She freezes for a second and looks down at where you touched her. Wow.

“Come on, don’t be so humble. You write your own stuff?”

“Yeah. Uh, I do.”

“You mind showing me?” Ellie startles. Of all the things she’d expected from tonight, she didn’t expect a late-night serenade. She places the guitar on her thigh, slipping it under her right arm. As she begins to play a song, you feel a weird shift in the air. Your face falls from its playful expression and you take the chance to admire her, from the dips and divets in her face to the artful spattering of freckles across her cheeks, to the scars along her arms and hands. You see her pretty tattoo again. It’s not perfect up close, but it’s more personal and charming. The ink is slightly faded and bleeds in the thinner areas. It looks like it covers a scar. Her eyebrows are furrowed as she focuses on hitting all the right notes, desperately wanting to impress you. 

As she finishes the song, she looks up at you, wide-eyed and vulnerable. You smile that bright smile at her again, and Ellie feels validated. Her chest is warm and her fingers are tingling- her body feels absolutely electrified. “You’re really skilled. That was amazing.”

Ellie shifts, subconsciously scooting closer to you as she does. Your thighs touch together and it feels right. It feels comfortable. “Thanks. Was that kinda cheesy or…?”

“How do you mean?”

“Was this a late-night guitar serenade?” She wiggles her eyebrows and you laugh.

“Mhm. Definitely. This some kind of meet-cute?” Ellie’s eyes crinkle again in the corners when you say this. You notice she doesn’t laugh a lot. She notices that you do. That’s charming, the two of you think.

“I don’t know. Is it working?” Her expression gets a little more serious. 

Your face experiences a flush of hot, then cold, as you feel yourself becoming embarrassed at how forward she is.” Yeah. It is.” You admit. She just nods, smiling.

“Cool.” It’s silent for a few beats again. “Cool cool cool.”

“...So, uh, I never got your name, actually.”

“Oh, shit, you’re right. I’ve just been calling you cute train girl. I’m Ellie.” Her hand slips into yours as you tell her your name. She’s a little clammy, but you are too. It’s awkward and a very weak handshake, but it’s incredibly important to the two of you.

“So uh-”

“Do you-” You both start to speak at the same time, and you chuckle and motion for her to speak first.

“Would you- and feel free to say no, like, I don’t wanna pressure you- but would you maybe want to go out with me? As a- as a make-up date of sorts?”

You grin like it’s the best thing you’ve ever heard. Ellie feels like a 17-year-old experiencing her first love because of how goddamn giddy she is. “I’d love that. I just- I don’t know about going out this late.” Ellie’s face falls a bit, and you feel like you kicked a puppy. You move quickly to defend what you said. “If you wanted to have the date now…” You pick the roses up from your side. A few have brown bruises from wilting, but you hand them to Ellie, who enjoys the gesture nevertheless.

“You’re corny.” She grins.

“You played the guitar for me. So, I guess you are too.” 

“Yeah. I guess so.” 

Ellie plays a few song covers for you. You give a few requests that she knows, and she peppers in a Weezer song and smiles like it’s the funniest thing ever. You play along, weirdly charmed. It feels like you’re the only two people in the world. The moment is far from perfect- the train jolts violently, the crisp fall air bites at your nose, and you and Ellie are both quite tired. But it’s a really, really nice moment. You know you’ll dream about it tonight.

Your stop comes first, and you reluctantly warn her that you’ll have to leave. Ellie asks for your number, and you happily give it to her. Her wallpaper is a picture of her and her friends, in which she is mid-eye roll. You smile a bit at it and put your contact name as “Cute Train Girl”. When you get your phone back, you see she’s put a dinosaur emoji next to her name. The speaker announces your station as the train rolls to a stop. Ellie stands up before you, taking your hand and helping you up.

“Would you maybe wanna do this again sometime? Not the ‘getting stood up and being on the gross train’ part, but like, a date. An actual date. Not one with someone doing k in the corner of a subway car?” You glance over at said man. Yeah, a real date sounds good.

“I’d love to. Just text me about it, yeah?”

Ellie breathes out a sigh of relief. “Yeah. Yeah, I will.”

You say goodbye and step out of the train car, and right as the train announces to be clear of the closing doors, a foot jams into it, and the door bounces back open. “Fuck, ow,” Ellie mutters. She runs out of the train and turns you to face her. “Don’t go yet. I just- I need to kiss you. I have for a while now.” She admits, and you fluster. She smiles at your reaction. “Don’t get too flattered.” She teases. 

You grin and bite your lip as she tilts your chin up. As your lips make contact, you realize that this is what you’ve been waiting for for months. There’s a sense of deja vu, like you’ve been experiencing this exact moment every night, and now that it’s finally happening, it barely feels real, but the feeling of Ellie’s lips against yours grounds you to the moment. You want to memorize the feeling of her adoration. 

You allow yourself to get lost in her touch, appreciating how lucky you were to get stood up.  If Cat wasn’t a no-show, you wouldn’t have gotten the chance to get to know Ellie. You wouldn’t have been able to explore this feeling with her. 

But most importantly, thank God for the red line and your incompetence with the card swiper.