#haters gonna hate and that's fine but it's a no from me i don't handle negativity well

[ghostmaggie]

people are totally free to have their opinions about stuff and to share them online (this is not groundbreaking and is meant sincerely) but i am thisclose to actively avoiding any discussion of the pjo show bc there's so much just straught blind negativity and it's bringing me way down

[racinggirl]

you always will be

a/n: As a dedication to our boy's FIRST FORMULA ONE WIN, here a story that hopefully will be appreciated and loved. It's very different from my usual stories, and it may need some sort of trigger warning or just a warning in general. We don't always get what we want, and life can really be a bitch. Everybody struggles, it might not always be seen. I'm here for you <3

Warnings: mentions of car accident, hospital, breakup, swearing, death, cemetery, and some fluff bc I'm not THAT cruel

Also, please leave a comment/reblog, anything that makes me feel like you absolutely loved this story. It can also be a tip, anything to make my writing better and more enjoyable for you, thank you

Enjoy 🧡

Winning a race was something he dreamt of. Winning a race meant all his worries disappeared like snow in the sun.

‘You can’t win, you always fuck up’

‘Russia 2021 was the closest you’d been to a win, you’ll never get that chance again’

‘You should have switched teams when you had the chance’

No more. He won, and he’d be damned if he would ever let any hate comment, any judging advice or any disrespectful tone push you further away from him than you already were. He won, but somehow it felt like he lost.

‘’Mate, I don’t get it. Help me understand, okay? You won your first Formula One race. You gave all of them haters a big fuck you. You proved them wrong. The team’s proud of you, everyone’s cheering you on.’’

It was true, everyone was proud of him, everyone cheered for him, chanting his name after the podium ceremony. Everyone. But one person.

‘’Hello? Lando?’’ Max seemed worried, he knew something was bothering his best friend, he knew him through and through. ‘’You’re confusing me, mate. What’s the matter? Aren’t you happy? You can’t be too hard on yourself now, mate, you wo-…’’

‘’It’s her!’’ He finally snapped, all the emotions he had bottled up and put in that jar, stashed away somewhere on the back shelf of his heart AND brain sneaked its way through and made a reappearance.

‘’I won! Yes, I fucking won! But at what cost?! I lost her mate! I won and she wasn’t here. That doesn’t mean I fucking won. I lost, I lost it all, I lost her…’’

Max let out a heavy sigh. He knew something was bothering his friend, and he had a slight feeling it would have had something to do with the girl that stole his heart. See, you and Lando go way back, and you’d always thought you’d end up together, whether it was in England, in Monaco, it didn’t matter, what mattered was that it’d always been the two of you together, till it wasn’t.

‘’Lando…’’ Here it was again, the 'I feel sorry for you, but you need to move on' speech, which sometimes Lando could appreciate, but not now, not at a moment like this. However, he remained silent.

‘’Look, mate, I know it’s hard, okay? You.. You’ve dreamt of this moment for years, and I’m sure she’d have been by your side in all those dreams, but…’’

‘’But reality is, she isn’t. I know Max, I know.’’ Lando ran his face through his hair, then over his face. ‘’I’m going to get a shower.’’

‘’Lando..’’

‘’I’m gonna shower, Max, I’d appreciate it if you’d leave and let me fucking shower!’’ Lando snapped, he never did, but today was full of too many emotions he couldn’t handle, too many mixed emotions that made the bucket spill over.

Raising his arms in defence, Max stepped back and nodded, slowly. He knew Lando needed time, but tonight was the after party, Zak had scheduled the flight for this evening back by a day, which meant they were planning on partying all night long.

‘’No, Lando, it’s not okay!’’ Your hands rose up in the air, toward your hair as you tugged on it, gently, but enough to let your frustrations out. ‘’It’s not okay, how is this okay?’’

‘’I… We’ll make it work, I promise you we’ll mak-‘’

‘’Stop trying to fix everything! Some things just can’t get fixed, okay?!’’

Lando and you were like two puzzle pieces that fit, perfectly fine. But what happens when one day, the piece that made those two pieces of the puzzle once a whole, disappeared. Broke off. Got thrown away which made it almost impossible for those two pieces to ever become whole again.

You loved him, more than anything in this whole entire world. You were determined to give up everything you ever had to be with him, to support him through thick and thin and you would never. Ever. Give up on each other...

‘’It’s been 4 months, give him some time.’’ Pietra’s reassuring hand made its way to Max’ shoulder.

It’d been 4 months since you and Lando broke up. You’d said your goodbyes at the airport after the two of you decided it was best to part ways. Lando tried almost everything to keep you at his side, but he knew that loving also meant letting go. That was the hardest part of a breakup, though, but he’d manage. Or so he thought.

You were lying when you said the breakup hadn’t torn your heart apart. It felt like it went through a shredder and every time you’d tried to pick up a piece and place it back, it didn’t fit. There were pieces missing, some things were upside down, backwards, or not even in the right place. It was heart-breaking.

Your breakup was something that nobody had seen coming, the fans, your friends, heck, not even the two of you saw it coming. You had always been different, but that didn’t stop you. Where you loved to stay at home and read a book, Lando loved to go out with his friends, plan his schedule full of events and parties. You’d join him, every now and then, but you preferred staying home.

Until you didn’t. But then it was too late.

‘’My parent’s need me back home.’’ You explained, the warm cup of tea in your hand preventing you from shivering. You and Lando were outside, watching the snow fall down the sky and onto the grass of his back yard in London.

‘’Alright, I can come if you want me to, I’m free till-..’’

‘’No, Lando, they need me back home, permanently.’’ You let out a shaky sigh, tears prickling behind your eyeballs as you kept your gaze focussed on your tea.

You had lived with Lando for almost 3 years now, the two of you dating for more than 5 years by the time you moved in together. Your parents knew his parents, and so the ball went rolling till it came to a stop in front of the two of you.

‘’What? But…’’

‘’I know.’’ Your voice was barely a whisper, the tears that you were desperately trying to hold back now made its appearance. Your parents were sick, both of them. You loved them more than anything, so leaving them and going to London, then to Monaco with the love of your life made you both happy and sad.

‘’No, Y/N, baby listen please, we can make it work. Okay? I’ll come over every month, we’ll do it together, I can…’’ But he knew everything he was saying was a lost cause. Your parents needed you, and as much as he wanted you to be with him, he knew you loved your parents. He’d never forgive himself if you staying with him meant you’d barely see your parents again.

‘’You know we can’t. We’ve been over this before.’’ Your voice was breaking more and more every word. ‘’It’s okay.’’ You whispered, the tea in your hands not being enough to keep you warm anymore. ‘’It’ll be okay…’’

‘’… on your win. And let’s make this party one to remember!’’ Cheers were hearable in the entire club, Lando being one of them. He laughed, partied, and celebrated. He won, he couldn’t ignore that, but that didn’t mean he didn’t think of how it could have been.

His job was hectic, of course. Being a Formula One driver – a race winning Formula One driver – meant events, races, meetings, and mostly, fame. You knew that if Lando would have stayed with you, if you would have done what he wanted – which was coming over once every month, it would bring attention to you and indirectly, to your parents, who could not use the attention at all.

After you and your parents got in a horrific car accident a few years after you and Lando started dating, the media was all over it. You barely had a chance to recover before the media would send you emails; press would be in front of your house and Lando’s interviews were all about how you and your parents were doing. It wasn’t healthy, at all. The press that did those things soon got boycotted by his fans, but that wasn’t the point here. They were there, they took away that bit of privacy you’d loved and cherished even more when Lando got more well known in the racing industry. When he joined Formula One.

You recovered completely – thankfully – but your parents, that was a whole other story. Both in a coma, one worse than the other, and the survival chances were low. Miraculously though, they woke up. The first 6 months, they had to stay at the hospital. Their wishes were to go home, so after 6 months, the hospital arranged things here and there so they could recover at home.

However, 2 years after the accident, you got the worst news possible. The car accident you and your parents were in caused your parents to both have brain damage, severely. They would need 24/7 care, and they would not get better. It was the worst possible scenario, but Lando was always there for you.

You just couldn’t do it, not with his fame, his busy schedule, your work. You worked from home, something you rearranged the moment you recovered from the car accident. It was the best option; you’d be able to work whenever you wanted, you could join Lando for his races. You could work from Monaco, England, it didn’t matter. You could work at home whenever Lando had a triple header, so you could take care of your parents whilst working from your laptop.

‘’You know they need me, and I love you so much, I…’’ The tears were streaming down your face after you had finished packing everything from Lando’s apartment – you were leaving.

‘’Shh..’’ Lando’s tears had dried on his cheeks, the sight of seeing you pack all your clothes in suitcases was the worst thing he’d ever seen. ‘’I know, sunshine, I know, but it’s okay. We’ll be okay.’’ He mumbled with the sorest throat from crying. He knew there was no more ‘we’ after you stepped out of that door. It was a commitment you made to each other.

‘If I need to go back and take care of them, move on. I don’t want you to spend the rest of your life waiting for me because I don’t know how long that’s going to take. I can’t expect you to put a hold on your life and come with me. You have a career, and I need you to put that on number one, be selfish, please.’

He always responded with the same thing. ‘’It doesn’t matter, you are my number one, you always will be.’’

‘’Lando Norris, your number one!’’ The music was pounding in his ears, the smile he had put on for this evening was fading slightly. When there was no camera around him, he’d let it drop, what was there to smile about?

Three months later

Moving on from a breakup was one thing, moving on from a breakup in which both individuals still loved each other but had to let go was another. Moving on from a breakup after finding out your parents had 2 more months to live, was impossible.

Your parents passed away 4 months ago, 3 months after you and Lando broke up. It was the hardest period of your life, and at some point, you weren’t even sure if you wanted to live the life you’d known for so long.

You’ve thought to yourself multiple times, why not go back to Lando? Tell him your parents passed away and everything would be okay. But that’s not the first thing that crosses your mind after your parents pass away. Especially not within the first four months of them being gone.

The number of times you’ve gotten close to pressing call on your ex-boyfriend’s number had been too many to count, but you couldn’t get yourself to do it. What were you going to say?

‘Hey Lando, yeah, my parents passed away, so I don’t have another thing to do, let’s get back together?’

Yeah, no. Not a chance.

You’ve watched his race win so many times it almost felt like you were there. You could imagine what it would have been like to be there, knowing the crew and drivers.

Why hadn’t you called him yet? Or why hadn’t you tried to congratulate him, reach out to his friends? No idea, you were still in that grieving state and you weren’t sure if you were going to break out of it.

That was until, one day, you saw this quote. It’s stupid to think one quote can change one’s perspective on things, but this one did.

‘If you don’t do it now, don’t regret it later.’

It was hard, doing the things you did, but not impossible. Impossible was getting over the death of your parents AND not having the one person you’ve loved more than anything not be there to help you through it.

So, you did it. You got in that car, which was something you’ve been avoiding after the accident, till Lando helped you get back into it. Your fingers dug into the leather of your father’s car, the one they left to you. Just like they left everything to you, the house, the money, the company.

A weak smile appeared on your face, so many memories in just one movement, one moment. The road was long, far, you had to stop at a hotel for a night of sleep before continuing your lonely road trip to London. Back to him. Because if you didn’t do it now, you would regret it later, and that’s something you couldn’t live with.

Another long day at the factory, more meetings, more shaking hands, interviews, you name it. His feet dragged him through the entire factory, not once, but three times already – and it was just lunch time. Things were better, he still missed you, but he was starting to accept it, just that, though, because moving on was impossible for him.

It wasn’t when one of the mechanics he always had lunch with called your name, that he turned his head so fast it would have almost gotten him a whiplash from the force and the speed. Your name, you were there, here.

A weak smile appeared on your lips. It wasn’t an easy choice, contacting Max, ignoring all his questions because you needed to see where he was, where the man you loved – and never stopped loving – was. It was bold, he might have moved on, gotten a new girlfriend, but you dug around the internet and didn’t see any signs of that being the case.

‘’Hey..’’

He was a race car driver, so he was fast, – very – fast. But the speed of which he got up and ran to you was another level. Your arms didn’t hesitate once. They found their way back around his neck, his positioned at your waist as always, and he looked into your eyes for a brief second, just to check, just to make sure that what he was about to do was okay. It was more than okay.

Your lips melted together instantly, his soft, warm lips immediately welcomed your slightly colder – due to the air-conditioning in the car – and even softer ones in a heartbeat. It felt good, it felt so good, you lost track of time, place and it was just the two of you in this moment. You did not regret it.

‘’Congratulations on your win, champ.’’ Your breath was a bit more rapid, your voice a lot hoarser than you would have liked it to be, but that didn’t matter. All that mattered was that you had found your way back to him, like you always would have.

4 years later

It was no longer impossible. It was hard, for sure, but the moment you stood in front of their gravestones, your hand intertwined with his and a weak smile on your lips, you were exactly where you were meant to be.

‘’Mom, dad..’’ You whispered, head resting against Lando’s chest as he pressed a delicate kiss to your temple. Your hand rested on top of Lando’s, who had a protected arm around you, his hand rubbing small circles on your stomach. You played with his ring for a few seconds before you swallowed the lump in your throat. You looked up at your husband, who gave you a reassuring smile as you placed the tiny shoes on top of their gravestones.

‘’You’re gonna be grandparents…’’

[lover-of-mine]

i'm fine with the bt scene being what it was because it showed what is. a shallow superficial relationship that is not being written as endgame so I'm fine with them not having a more emotional connection make it more obvious its BONES in s8.

Okay, I'm gonna say this and I need everyone to know I genuinely mean it, I'm not fine with it. I am tired of the show giving Buck and Eddie love interests that exist to have no agency besides girlfriend/boyfriend or plot device for an exposition dump. I desperately wanted to care about bt. Buck being bi is such incredible representation and I spent the whole season waiting to be convinced I should like T and bt together for anything beyond the fact that they are a queer relationship but I keep coming up empty-handed. I like being a hater right now because no criticism of him is allowed without someone screaming that you're homophobic or hate gay people and that everyone in the show is problematic why doesn't he get a pass too so I am grabbing on to every wrong thing about him the same way people are blowing the good things to justify my aversion to him. But the thing is, T is a character who's being written in a way that is so hard to sympathize with when it comes to Buck. He has this shell that makes him rigid and he has this dry sense of humor and he could be interesting if he was willing to bend a little bit for Buck. That relationship was not something I could get behind when T left Buck on the curb, because while I do believe T was incredibly justified in not liking the situation Buck put them in, he could've communicated that better before he was literally in the car leaving Buck behind, so there Buck was once again in a relationship with someone who left him because they can't handle who he is. That was the impression I got from that first date and I keep waiting for them to be cute for me to move past it and the show is giving me nothing. Why did they make the choice to not let T dress up for the bachelor party and indulge Buck when the job by definition requires for him to change into a uniform so he could've put in some effort? Why did he let Buck walk around with his face covered in soot when they could've shown us a shot of him cleaning Buck's face before they walked into the room holding hands and give the impression that there's more going on there than a few makeout sessions? Why weren't they affectionate at the ceremony? Why wasn't that conversation in the hospital, where it would've shown a level of care and that joke could've been seen as an attempt to make Buck feel better about what was going on? Why are they always two steps to the left of being cute or having any fighting chance? And that's ignoring how intertwined Eddie is with the beginning of their relationship because that's just disturbing. The triangle thing is annoying as fuck if Eddie was not gonna get confirmed as queer and the sides wouldn't actually connect.

I think narratively Buck and Eddie getting together is the thing that makes the most sense for both of their characters, but if that's not gonna happen, I wanna care about the people they're with. I love Buck as a character, I want him to have a nice love story if for whatever reason we are not getting buddie because love is the thing he's been searching for, and whatever bt has going is not it. And the thing that's killing me is that it could be. It's the same thing they did with Taylor because if Taylor was as intense about Buck as she is about the job, they could work, but the show made a choice to use the development of her character to stir away from Buck. And T, he's just there. And it's frustrating. I don't even wanna get into the comparisons between buddie and bt because imma be honest I'm still processing the way the show had T refusing to dress on theme and then had Eddie suggest matching outfits in the next scene, what even was that?? But the way the show constantly takes the chances they have to give depth to their relationship, looks it in the eye, and runs the other direction it's just........... yk? This is Buck's fifth relationship and I can't for the life of me look at it and see where it's going because they are making it seem like it's going nowhere. T parallels Taylor all the time visually, when it comes to screentime he's just a step above Ali, he's nowhere near as developed as Taylor was at this point. I had hopes for that scene when they started to talk about parents, for 20 seconds, I believed they were gonna give emotional depth to them, but they didn't. And I was literally sitting here begging them to give me something to care about when it comes to them if they are gonna keep them together but I have nothing to show for it and I hate it. There's no emotional connection, they will probably breakup at some point during s8 and I'm just gonna be there "oh wow another failed romance what a surprise" while they keep playing up Buck and Eddie's partnership and not letting them go all the way, and it's just tiring.

And this is ignoring the way we keep getting yelled at for not resonating with them. I sincerely don't want to hate them but I can't find a reason to care about them.

[away-ward]

The incorrect quote generator isn't always very accurate for the boys over flowers characters, so I don't have many, but here are the ones I've collected over time. I have no idea where the quotes come from. Feel free to copy your favorites.

Edit: forgot to mention the rules. To make it fun, I can't change any of the names even if I think it would be perfect for a different character. It has to be randomly perfect and these are the results.

--

Tsukushi: Adulting is hard.

Tsukushi: How do I quit?

Akira: Time travel.

Sojiro: Die.

--

Tsukushi: Crushes are the worst. Whenever I’m near mine, I start acting stupid.

Tsukasa: You always act stupid.

Tsukasa:

Tsukasa: Wait...

--

Akira: Where are your parents?

Sojiro: What are parents?

Akira: That’s just about the saddest thing I ever heard get said.

--

Tsukasa: Do you ever feel like exploding? Have you experienced the urge to enter the process of combustion? Has your mind created a logical idea, known as thought, to disperse your body into thousands of particles suddenly?

Sojiro: It’s 3 am, please go back to sleep.

--

Sakurako: Now, if I may speak for good-looking people everywhere...

Tsukushi: Only as their rodeo clown.

--

Akira: Talk dirty to me~

Tsukushi: Inflation is a serious problem and lumber prices are at a high.

Akira: Wha-

Tsukushi: The economy is in shambles.

--

Tsukasa: We'll talk about this later.

Tsukushi: Fine, I won’t be listening.

--

Shigeru: If you get in trouble, I'm gonna be like... a lawyer to you. Ok?

Tsukasa: Okay.

*later*

Ren: Tsukasa! Sit down on the chair, you're in trouble.

Shigeru, whispering: Deny everything.

Tsukasa, loudly: That isn't a chair.

--

Tsukasa: You wanna fight?! You got one!

Shigeru: Okay! *raises fists*

*Akira runs in, scoops Shigeru up in his arms, and runs away carrying her*

Tsukasa:

Tsukasa: What?

--

Shigeru: I am so cool. I am an absolute Chad. I am the epitome of coolness and awesomeness—

Tsukushi: Hi.

Shigeru: *melts down in a flustered heap of softness*

--

Ren, texting Akira: I’m a theif.

Akira: Thief.

Ren: Theif.

Akira: I before E except after C.

Ren: Thceif.

Akira: NO.

--

Ren: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?

Sakurako : It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.

Yuki: Three of us saw it, Sakurako . How do you explain that?

Sakurako : *points at Tsukasa* Sleep deprivation. *points at Yuki* Paranoia. *points at Sojiro* Delusional personality disorder.

--

Shigeru: Go ahead, Tsukasa. Let it out, cry. If you don't, your tear ducts will get blocked up, and then when you get old, you won't be able to cry.

Sakurako : Just when we thought it was safe to let you back into the conversation.

--

Sakurako, to Tsukasa: You wanna fight? All right, let’s take this outside. The stars are so bright tonight and the moon looks so nice. Here, hold my hand—

--

Shigeru: Bro-

Akira: No, no, hold up, rewind.

Akira: My tongue was down in your throat just a second ago and now you're calling me bro??

--

Ren, grinning: Before you were what?

Sojiro: Before I was-

Ren: What?

Sojiro: Before I was inter-

Ren: Before you were interrupted?

Sojiro: Cut me off one more time and I swear I'll-

Ren: What?

Sojiro: *makes frustrated sound*

Tsukushi, nervously: Stop that. Before he hurts you.

--

Akira: Life could be worse, Tsukushi.

Tsukushi: Life could be a lot better too!

--

Shigeru: I’m sorry, I really flew off the handle back there. It was like the handle was a bald guy going really fast, and I was his toupée.

--

Sakurako: You know me, Tsukushi, I don’t take any shit. You know what I say to my haters?

Tsukushi: What?

Sakurako: I say: “Please don’t hate me, I’m really nice.”

--

Akira: Okay, help me, please!

Sakurako: Got two words for you.

Akira: I bet they won't be helpful.

Sakurako: Your problem.

Akira: I was right.

--

Sakurako: My only talent is being stress.

Tsukushi: Don't you mean stressed?

Sakurako: No.

--

Tsukushi: We have a problem.

Sojiro: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

--

Shigeru: I mean, sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.

--

Shigeru: What do you guys do when you're stressed?

Tsukushi: Try and calm myself down!

Ren: Sleep.

Tsukasa: Get myself into even more stress, so that the first reason for my stress gets cancelled out.

Sakurako: I don't.

--

*playing twister*

Sakurako: Right hand red.

Sojiro: *ends up on top of Tsukasa*

Tsukasa: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?

Sakurako: I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice.

--

Akira: Are you trying to seduce me?

Sojiro: Why, are you seducible?

--

Tsukasa: Honestly, I am so evil. So full of darkness. I feed of the souls of the living I strike fear into-

Ren: You sleep with a teddybear.

Tsukasa: He’s my sECOND IN COMMAND IN MY ARMY OF DARKNESS!

--

Tsukasa: Social distancing says you shouldn't be within an elbow's distance of each other.

*later, in a barfight*

Tsukasa: Social distancing doesn't say nothing about feet! *kicks opponent in the face*

--

Shigeru: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Sojiro: But we lost Akira.

Shigeru: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

--

Sojiro, to Sakurako: You drink too much, swear too much, and your morals are highly questionable.

Sakurako: …

Sojiro: You are everything I’ve ever wanted in a best friend.

--

Shigeru: Look, I know we don’t always see eye to eye but—

Tsukasa: Thats because your too short to do so.

Shigeru: ...Listen here you fucking—

--

Ren: Do you even, cuddle, bro? Do you even lift, bro… each other up with kindness? Do you tell your loved ones that you care about them regardless of who is listening? DO YOU EVER RESOLVE CONFLICTS, EMOTIONAL ISSUES THROUGH COMPROMISE AND COMPASSION RATHER THAN ANGER AND DENIAL?!

--

Sakurako: This date is boring!

Sojiro: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store.

Sakurako: Then why did you invite me?

Sojiro: I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Sojiro I'll do whatever I want!

[harleysplayground]

just gonna put this out there.

bands that suck ever since talent left.

blood on the dance floor becoming most vivid nightmares losing garret ecstasy, jayy von monroe and fallon vendetta only one track that is new is decent. older stuff with past members is still gold and some sinners are winners tracks are still tanzinite as well but with thr most vivid nightmares it blows chunks. bring back botdf gold and tanzinite if new love is to be made on new trax.

black veil brides losing alva and purdy made me lose interest. it isn't just the fact that scremo and post hardcore trigger me. the real talent left with a slight exception of jinx and andy in there still I loathe the new bleeders track. if the new album doesn't have tracks that are all like bleeders I'll withdraw my statement but they just don't sound the same anymore.

Eminem used to get booed off stage just like MGK and had Ice T save his ass only for him to go and forget he used to walk in MGK's shoes. also it's common sense if you can't handle someone saying shit about your music especially another celebrity you don't belong in the industry. artists or fans who fire back at comments about your music you aren't supposed to take it as an attack and fire back. if they try to screw your career for clout then fine but don't be petty and do a diss track because someone don't like your music bro. that's playground shit..and not the kinda shit I want on my Harley's Playground either. take a note from the person who made this video because it's FACT! drop the ego because you walked in your rivals shoes once and Ice T saving you from the bullies called your now fans used to loathe you like like your rival, except I don't see MGK having anyone to help his ass out making him more REAL.

long live the RAP DEVIL who made you nail your own coffin with your own diss track KILL SHOT. don't say you don't a fuck either because your diss tracks prove that everyone who fired at you isn't wrong. you care, you care enough to fire back with a diss track. let sleeping dogs lie and just clean your closet to jump in it in shame bro.

also haters prove your doing something right, everyone loves your old stuff but who always gets hated? MGK..so if we go off that bro it's one hater on you vs many on him..I think MGK is doing just fine.

[blorbocedes]

Usually as I find more and more unflattering lore about my blorbos it cures my obsession but for some reason w/ Nico it just makes me even more intrigued. It's not even always apologia lol sometimes I just think "thats horrible" with no "but it's ok". Also by the way I've noticed you're very keen on Max (and I'm not) so I'm eager to see if you can convince me of that too (as you did with brocedes)

this is a really interesting ask! one thing about me is I'm for haters rights. I'm a hater myself, and sports needs antagonist to your protags -- it's simply more fun, and I'm here to have fun. I've got people here who hate macks, lewis, lando; and that's fine by me. you like who you like. if you hate Nico it'll probably be a bit awkward but yeah lol... I'm going to essay because you've caught me in a Mood so buckle in

I'm not necessarily in the business on converting people either... I think people are just attracted to other passionate people... the love for a blorbo is infectious. i follow so many DR girlies that he's like a son-in-law to me. so this won't be me converting me but in true max fashion I will be maxplaining my thoughts that no one asked for while you're stuck captive 😈

onto unpleasant lore. there is simply no one with a perfect, unblemished history. Nico's greenwashing, privileged, tone deaf, not even gonna Touch the 💉, a little bit manipulative girlboss slay. even the very best of the grid are ultimately filthy rich, sportswashing, and hypocritical -- esp if they're climate activists. none of our blorbos are immune

i think it also helps with Nico that he's retired, beyond talking shit he doesn't actually pose a threat to your blorbo on the grid. Max is the world champion so he's everyone on the grid's pain in the ass rn. I think there's a lot of fair reasons to hate max, and then there's a lot of unfair reasons that's more popular narrative. how I got into Nico was I saw a bunch of people on twitter hating him and I was like lol who's This guy 😂🤣 let me learn more about him so I'm an Informed hater🤓 and then... well 🥴

if you don't like macks, that's okay! you don't even need a "valid" reason. i wanna punch Lance Stroll in the face, I don't have a reason for it. we don't choose our blorbos.

why I enjoy max is cause

a) sick racer. seriously, generational talent. there's this idea that he's some super unsafe crash happy driver but that's really not true, and that narrative is from 2016 -- when he was a wee baby 17 year old. Imagine you're defined by how you were at 17 🫥 I would die. we are watching history in the making: and we'll be seeing him on the grid for many more years inshallah. sexy ass racing... and no it's not cause he's got the best car. i think just how much fun he had wheel to wheel racing with a broken car against Mick in France showed that. this dude just loves racing the way you and I will never love anything

b) he's just Some Guy.

there's a lot of narratives about how evil he is.... but my understanding of him is a dude who doesn't care to play along with the PR optics of a situation. He's blunt, he's honest -- it can be off putting to some, but I find it really refreshing. if you ask him if he's scared of Marc's straight line speed, he'll just say no. yes king give me nothing!! he is the ultimate what you're seeing is what you're getting. he's simply max :)

what I love about him is his innate self belief. he had a dad who projected all his failed ambitions on him, and the post linked by bella does a good job of explaining the parental abuse. I also speak about it here. fandom ofc cannot handle a topic that nuanced, which leads to the worst fucking takes of all time. max is not defined by his abuse, rather time and again he's shown how much so much more, so full of love. he was practically groomed to be a racer, but he's so much more than the weight of the expectations put on him since childhood. there's this interview of baby teen max asking if he thinks he'll be a better racer than his dad and he just says "I am." you need to have that kind of faith in yourself, and prove it!!!!!!!

his whole circle is friends from years back, his mom and his sister, and his gf/her kid. he's literally 24, rich, successful he can have or do anything he wants, and he just likes chilling with his family and playing the sim 🥺 a family dude through and through

beyond that, he's truly just Some Dude. he's got a dry sarcastic sense of humour, has mommy issues, likes to be in the arms of other stronger men, he comes across as a dude with a decent head on his shoulders. yes he bitches in the car and swears a lot and breaks his DRS button pressing it 50 times, and then goes to say he thinks he's pretty calm lolol I love unreliable narrators. it also says a lot that most of the grid likes him, Daniel, Fernando, Lando, Carlos, Charl, he's capable of being a normal dude off the track who isn't untouchable.

C) tits and thighs

before I got into f1, I saw this black and white video of max from Abu Dhabi celebrations, drunk as shit, in some dude's arms singing "we are the champions" I knew NOTHING about him beyond he just became the world champion of ??? something, and he seems so, so happy. and for me that's all it took. that's my golden shoe boy.

I think he's simply lovely :)

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Hi there! Wanna start off by saying I absolutely love reading all your posts/theories! I was a big TD believer back in the day, but slowly lost hope until I stopped watching twd around S7. I’ve recently rewatched/caught up to current episodes, & of course fell back in love with Bethyl which has led me back to TD. My concern isn’t that Beth could come back, I want that more than anything and think it would be an incredible storyline. I’m worried that TPTB don’t actually have the ability to pull off something that interesting or that they truly just disregarded Beth back in S5. How have you kept the faith through all these seasons that she hasn’t returned that she will at some point? I would love it SO much if she did but I just don’t believe in TPTB that much. (Sorry for the long ask!)

Well, there's no way for me to prove that tptb can pull this off. We mostly just have to wait and see what happens.

All I can do is point to past returns that they've managed without a hitch. There are new and emerging characters that were brought in to film and no one knew a thing about them until we saw them either on the show or on the trailer (think Ezekiel). And then there were well known characters who returned after several seasons, but no one knew they were returning until we saw them (Merle, Morgan, Morales).

And yes, I'm aware of arguments that can be made about these things. No one was looking for the new characters to be there. (True, except that some people were in a passive way because they were characters from the comic books). And with those other returning characters, they weren't shot in the head and presumed dead. True, but Merle did have his hand cut off, and no one was thinking Morales would be alive or be brought back. Like, ever.

But think of all the times someone has been overwhelmed by walkers, only to return later in the same episode. Tyreese, in 4a, Rick in 7x12. Even Negan (because of Beta) in S10. Beth's return is basically the same thing, only on a much larger scale.

And don't get me wrong. It's by far the biggest, craziest return they've attempted. It's also gonna be the hardest for the audience to accept, especially the haters. There's going to be a small but very vocal group who absolutely hate the story line of her return. But that doesn't mean tptb can't pull it off.

Recently, we've learned that Madison will be returning to Fear. And that's already different than Beth, because they've announced it beforehand, which I don't think they'll do with Beth. But if they can pull off Madison's return, after telling the audience unequivocally that she was dead, I think they'll pull off Beth's return just fine. In fact, most of us suspect the reason they're handling Madison's return this way is to prime the audience for Beth's return, so there will be less backlash by those who don't buy her survival.

Anyway, I don't know if any of this is helpful. Just my thoughts on things. I have complete confidence in the writers' ability to pull this off. They've planned for it for a long time and, from what we can tell, have not deviated much from any of their plans over the years. No reason Beth's return will be any different. Xoxo! ❄️💘

[nebulousfishgills]

My thoughts on the finale (long post)

Okay, I really just wanna put some thoughts down and I need to do it here. Spoilers and opinions, you can choose to agree or not, but please be respectful

I usually try to have a good attitude about things, pointing out the best in everything.

I'm having a really hard time right now.

That's not to say the episode was bad, it's just...

Well, I feel like I'm watching the Game of Thrones finale again. I just feel so unfulfilled. Then again, my hormones are a little out of wack at the moment (thanks mother nature) so my odd feelings could be because of that. I feel so angry and upset and hyped and... I don't honestly know. I really don't. I feel like I want to throw up, but not in a bad or good way.

I guess I just...

Feel.

I've stayed up every night for every episode because I just adored it so much. Yet I feel like... there should be more. I know we got a second season confirmed, but we don't know when. We don't know what it means for the future of the MCU. We don't know anything.

I guess we should have expected this because Loki was supposed to be this new horizon for the MCU. Doctor Strange 2 needed a plot. Someone said this show was just a big ad for MoM, and I find myself disagreeing with that, but only a little.

I think the best way to describe it is it's like the show suddenly decided it wanted to be something else. It's not a bad thing necessarily, but after episode 3, the tone really shifted.

I'm trying really hard to hold off on my more detailed thoughts, but they just keep creeping in, so I'll just wrap up this... intro? Idk.

I think the TLDR is that I feel disappointed, but I don't really blame anyone. Kate Herron, Mike Waldron, they all did AMAZING jobs. They really deserve the highest of praise for this. Is it my favorite MCU project? Yes. Am I excited for season 2? Absolutely.

But Game of Thrones can still be my favorite show and I can still dislike the ending.

I find writing this out is helping me feel better. Once I sleep it'll probably feel less... hopeless.

Now, next section. My thoughts on key plot points.

We all figured Kang would be introduced. I'm actually very excited to see what they do with him. The actor was just phenomenal and I can't wait to see him later on. Someone call up Erik Voss because he redeemed himself after the whole Mephisto deal

I guess the Multiverse was reborn, but not in the way I was expecting/hoping. I feel like there's a large gap between when the timeline shattered and the final scene with Loki, Mobius, and B-15. What happened? Though, I guess it makes sense. We all wanted a multiverse. We never considered the consequences.

I'm angriest about Mobius losing his memories and not getting his jetski. Like I said, Yelena can get a dog in BW after mentioning it once. But as someone on Reddit pointed out, they had to make sure Marvel would greenlight a second season. It does not mean I can't have a huge cow about it. That's what we get for jinxing it, friends.

I think I understand what Star Wars Sequel haters went through. Getting all these grand (maybe... glorious?) ideas about the ending and what a hopeful message about destiny and identity the series could give us. And the series gave us... none of that. Hell, I was so sure these would be used, and I was bamboozled. I'm sure others saw it coming, but they just looked too good to be fake out shots. My best guess is that they're gonna use this footage in season 2 for a plotline and they stuck it in here to trick us... but maybe that's just me being desperate

It was barely 1 AM here, Marvel. The Miss Minutes jumpscare was NOT COOL. I mean, THIS IS HORRIFYING IN LIGHT AS WELL

I'm really confused about Ravonna now. Is she good or is she bad? Where did she go? And why was it important we see her backstory and not any of the others (say, B-15 or Mobius)?

God, okay, I guess I have to address the elephant in the room now.

The Sylki kiss and then betrayal fight thing.

Let me get one thing very extremely clear before I continue: I do prefer Lokius, but I am FINE with Sylki. I think I've just been desensitized to any ship that ends with -cest because, as I've made clear here and in the past, I adore Game of Thrones and Crimson Peak.

I honestly think my main reservation about it is a flaw within myself that I dared not admit until I saw it staring me in the face: I'm probably a little possessive. I can admit this and I really dislike it about myself. But I think I'm just not a fan of Loki having a love interest in general. What makes Lokius different, I have no clue. Maybe deep down I knew Marvel was too much of a pussy to ever make it canon... then again, I was begging for a last minute kiss or something. My feelings on the matter are complicated.

But the way they handled the kiss in this episode? Gotta say, not too much of a fan. I know some antis like this, but it just felt too... not genuine. Maybe I'm just an idiot who thinks all kissing should have a meaning. A purpose. The Reylo kiss in Rise of Skywalker? Ben just saved Rey's fucking life, I think that warrants a large gesture of affection.

But this?

I think I get bad juju from the kiss, not the fact that they made it Canon. You can disagree or agree any way you want, you can even send nasty anon messages. That's my opinion and I'm choosing to stick to it.

And sending nasty anons won't do squat, I don't give a shit about faceless threats and hate.

Anyways, back to my point

The fight felt like a mutual betrayal, but at the same time it felt like neither really wanted to go through with it. I admit I felt Sylvie was more in the right and that Loki seemed a little too complacent, especially after everything he went through and saw. But like Sylvie, I didn't consider the consequences and now everything is fucked. But I still don't think Loki was right.

I think it boils down to being an impossible choice because no matter what you pick, everyone loses.

I believe that my main gripe with Sylvie and Loki's ideology split is that it feels a little too rushed and/or, dare I say it, out of character. I've agreed with Loki's characterization up until this point (again, you can disagree with me, that's your opinion and you have full right to it), but... man, I don't know. It all feels like an impossible situation.

Then again, I'm not the one in the director's chair. I'm not the team in the writers room. I don't know the first thing about making a project like this. I like taking solace in the fact that Tom had some creative control in the series about the character he loves so much. And, let's be real, he knows Loki the best out of all of us. None of us can hold a candle to that.

We can call ourselves experts, but Tom is the real expert. I trust him more than anyone. If he hated how this was turning out, he probably would have said something.

We just have to trust in the creative process

So, at the end of the day, this series was (and still is, remember, season 2 is on the way) absolutely phenomenal and I think it's Marvel's strongest work in a very long time. They know Loki is a character we all love and adore and I feel like they've done their best in honoring that. Besides, what other character is getting a second season? How awesome is that??

I found writing this out helped me process my thoughts and emotions IMMENSELY. I don't feel as... angry? Hopeless? I don't know. I keep comparing this to the end of Game of Thrones, and I feel like that's doing a disservice to Loki. Game of Thrones' ending was just absolute dog shit and there was no chance to redeem it because it was the last season.

Loki has a second season on the way.

It's not over yet.

Nothing is ever final until the universe forces it.

Kang can be stopped

The Multiverse can roam free

Loki can learn to find true happiness

Sylvie can stop running and fighting

Ravonna can redeem herself

The TVA can burn or reform (whichever you choose)

And yes

Mobius can get a jetski

We know nothing yet of season 2, what it will entail, how it connects to the rest of the Marvel Universe, or even when it will be out. But I know that I will eagerly await it when that day comes. I will once again put on a smile. I will wait hours to watch the new episode the moment it drops. I will be excited for it and enjoy it.

Because, at the end of the day, that's all it's about. Telling a story. And, mother of God, Marvel sure is telling a good one.

Until next time, my friends.

For All Time. Always!

-FishGills

[shifting-lark]

hello! i just want to send a positive message to you and everyone who sees this in regards to this youtuber's deep dive. if this person truly decides to make her video mocking us(which Im sure it will be mocking because a couple years back people used to love to mock different peaceful tumblr communities)(im actually surprised that kurtis conner or cody ko haven't made a video on reality shifting since they are usually the kings of making fun of people) i just want to let everyone know you are safe and loved, none of this stupid shit matters and deep down we all have the answers-meditate, focus on yourself, focus your own energy on self care and love for yourself. I used to be very sensitive to things like that - people making fun of me, laughing at my interests, thinking im insane for believing in things that you cannot see or feel with your physical body and senses. But you know what - literally FUCK THAT. There is so sososo much proof that we are living in a matrix, that this whole world makes absolutely zero sense there ARE LITERAL CIA DOCUMENTS ABOUT TIME TRAVEL, QUANTUM JUMPING FOR FUCKS SAKE. So please anyone who is scared of this dont be this shit is irrelevant it will pass- there is love and light inside you and no one absolutely no one can take that away from you. I truly wish most people weren't this hateful and mocking to others but unfortunately this is what they chose to be, this is their current path and there is nothing you can or should do. All you need in this time is yourself, focus and go deeper within you - all the answers are there and they always were❤️ (im very sorry for the long rant but im very sad to see so many people scared because someone in a position of power might decide to make fun of literally one of the sweetest most peaceful communities ive ever been in) anyway sorry if this was annoying if you don't want to answer that is okay and if you do i hope it helps motivate at least one person i would be so so happy if it does❤️❤️❤️ have a lovely day/night dear!!

This was not annoying at all don’t worry!! Thank you for sending it!!!

I appreciate this a lot and you’re very right! It’ll all be alright and everything will pass, so anyone who isn’t nervous or doesn’t care, that’s totally fine!! But I do want to say anyone who IS nervous or anxious that is also TOTALLY valid.

Getting excess hate/bullying is hard for some people. And of course we can say “words don’t matter” but I have high social anxiety so it’s kinda nerve racking for a bunch of new people to be shown shifting blogs etc. I’m gonna delete every hate message I get, but I’ll still have to be “exposed” to them.

I just want people to know it’s okay however you are handling this. If you want to prepare for the worst (like me) and make things private or delete posts, that’s totally understandable. If you don’t care and aren’t gonna change anything, that’s also fair.

But bottom line: I’m not going anywhere. I might be “hunkered down” for a bit until this shit passes, but I’m not gonna stop believing in shifting and I’m certainly not leaving shiftblr. This is the nicest community I’ve been apart of EVER and I’m not letting some haters ruin that completely.

So just hang tight everyone and wait for this deep dive hype to pass (and cross your fingers it might not even happen) Love y’all 💕

[vkinorthst4r]

I wish I could be less of a pussy and openly support you off anon but I've had so much drama with the apex fandom already I don't think I could handle them again. But anyway, hope you don't mind me ranting? Just delete this if you want. as someone who is part of the lgbt this community I'm ashamed with this fandom. It's hella toxic. Everyone's supportive and inclusive unless youre straight or the wrong kind of gay and its disgusting. I don't care if they call me a bootlicker. What they're doing is wrong and the fact that they can't see that is highly disturbing. Not to mention they make me, a member of their own community, feel more unsafe to talk to then you, the person who's supposed to be homophobic.

Anyway. Try and have a chill day. Im out.✌

No your perfectly fine bro, save yourself the headache 😂 but yea I agree. No matter HOW MNAY TIMES I SAY THIS they just completely ignore the fact that they hate straight people. If you never noticed that all the straight ships don’t get ANY type of love from this so called fandom at all. Only the gay ones it’s very very sad. And they can call me whatever the fuck they want it’s not like imma cry over it like they do 💀💀 anyway like I’ve said 100x if your gonna hate on straight people then I’m gonna hate on you so keep the same energy. Idc at this point I’m tired of being nice to these 🍭 they just don’t care about us but want us to kiss their asses. Nah gtfo call me whatever you want a homo, bootlicker, gay hater Idgaf. And they refuse to actually have a conversation not to mention. Cuz they know they’re wrong.

[rwood2477]

TO MY TRUMP HATING FRIENDS,

Literally every conversation I've had with a Trump hater about the upcoming election goes something like this:

Hater: I can't wait to get Donald Trump out of office.

Me: Why?

Hater: Why?!?! Don't tell me you don't think he colluded with Russia!

Me: According to Robert Mueller's exhaustive, 2-yr multi-million dollar investigation, there was no evidence of that. But there was evidence that the Obama administration spied on him and his campaign using the FBI.

Hater: Well, he said he'd repeal and replace Obamacare. What happened to that?

Me: Well, he removed the tax penalty which removes the mandate. Congress now just has to move with its replacement. He can't do it by Executive Order. You do know Obama had very little to do with the writing of the ACA, right?

Hater: Well, he said he'd build a wall and Mexico was gonna pay for it. Haha. What happened to that?

Me: They've built over 300 miles of new wall so far and he's renegotiated NAFTA costing Mexico billions of dollars that were given to them by Bill Clinton through the returning of jobs in America.

Hater: Well, that's not them paying for it!

Me: BILLIONS. Did you think he literally meant Mexico was gonna write a check with "Wall" in the memo?

Hater: Well, he's buddy buddy with Putin and Kim Jung Un.

Me: Getting along with your adversaries is not a bad thing. Or would you prefer he antagonize them? BTW, when was the last "test missile" North Korea sent Japan's way?

Hater: Well, he doesn't like the military! He called the dead soldiers "losers!"

Me: You're referring to a report made from "anonymous sources", when over nine people who were with the President have gone on record saying that it wasn't true? That doesn't send up any red flags for you? He's brought our Vets home and taken great strides with their benefits. He also tackled something that no previous administration has been able to do - fixing the badly broken VA. Ask any veteran you know. Funny way to treat people you think are "losers," don't you think?

Hater: Well, he got impeached for God's sake!

Me: Yes, impeached by a partisan House and subsequently acquitted as there was no evidence that the President did anything wrong (no quid pro quo) in his communication with the President of Ukraine. BTW, you know Joe Biden actually admitted on national TV to doing that exact thing while he was in office as VP though, right?

Hater: Well he handled COVID horribly!

Me: What would you have done differently?

Hater: He didn't close the borders in time!

Me: He announce travel restrictions on 1/31 and was called racist, xenophobic, and fear monger for doing so, all the while Nancy Pelosi and Bill Deblasio were walking in Chinatown telling everyone to come on down, the water is fine.

Hater: Well, he refused to wear a mask.

Me: Here's a picture of him wearing a mask.

Hater: Well, that was too far after!

Me: After what? He had two of his experts on national TV every day giving updates and telling everyone to wear a mask?

Hater: Well, he said everything will be fine and this will end!

Me: Did you want him to run around screaming that the sky was falling?

Hater: Well, listen to the way he talks! He's nasty! He's not how I want my President to sound.

Me: Ahhh. NOW we're getting somewhere. You don't like his style or personality. And everything you've mentioned up until now is because you don't like them. So for you it seems personal and not about the job he's done. So listen, if you want a President who will tell you whatever you want to hear, flip-flopping on every issue, not getting anything done his entire time while in office, but who sounds like a nice guy (even though he seems seriously impaired), then Joe Biden is definitely your man.

(FEEL FREE TO COPY & PASTE TO SHARE!)

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: what are you doing tonight? Jimmy: the answer is saving my life, if you need a clue but Janis: dramatic Janis: but I do know first aid so 👍 Janis: should be good? Jimmy: dress like you're going to dinner with a casual racist, his fancy woman & some unloved kids then meet me at my house for Ian's clocking off time Jimmy: alright? Janis: oh no Janis: really? Janis: it's your birthday, Ian, could do anything you want Jimmy: he's been there done that, we skipped it Jimmy: but my postcard did arrive so 👍 Janis: it's nice he missed me and all but Janis: ick Janis: alright Jimmy: you ain't actually invited by him Jimmy: just me Jimmy: don't be too 💔 Janis: shh Janis: such a hater Janis: do you actually want me to dress like a respectful church girl or am I meant to come full slut, like what's your vibe here Jimmy: bring a bag big enough to stuff the 🐶 in, she is & she'll wreck the place quicker than even Bob could do Jimmy: as for what you wear, express yourself, babe Janis: 😂 Janis: is that white people code for ethnic Janis: bit #problematic Jimmy: there's no code Jimmy: or dress code Jimmy: you hate him, you know what to do Jimmy: it ain't what we wear that matters Janis: but miraculously, I don't completely hate you Janis: not tryna fuck it up in the wrong ways, like Jimmy: he can't stab me with a salad fork or do me over with a corkscrew in the middle of a restaurant Jimmy: gutted for him Janis: political correctness gone mad Janis: but true Jimmy: we'll leave before his girlfriend does so he can't say or do owt Jimmy: don't worry Janis: trust he's not hit you yet then for going AWOL Janis: not very family-friendly Jimmy: she was here when I got in so nah Jimmy: maybe she'll move herself proper & really fuck his life up Janis: 💕 Jimmy: it'd be a first but he's one year closer to 💀 & that's at least 20 off by northern standards Janis: might've been hasty, not having you around to raise them for a whole week Janis: rush her up the aisle, Ian Jimmy: he don't have a shotgun license 💔 too 😭😭 to be allowed Jimmy: unlucky dad Jimmy: he could try knocking her up but she ain't that much younger than him so Janis: grim Janis: happens sometimes Janis: not putting it past my mother to have a last hurrah Jimmy: don't Jimmy: I ain't raising no baby for him Jimmy: got enough on Janis: she'll have to at least do the breatfeeding bit Janis: pull your weight, evil stepmum Jimmy: 🍼 as soon as Jimmy: that's how we were all churned out Jimmy: no hippies here Janis: brave, the health visitors practically crucify you for that Jimmy: like he's bothered Jimmy: parent of the year 🏆 Janis: all this talk of babies is giving me ptsd Jimmy: shut up then Jimmy: I need to be able to touch you later Janis: charming chat as ever Jimmy: 💕 Janis: good thing you don't need it Janis: already miss you so Jimmy: if you need it you know I will Jimmy: I miss you too Janis: not gonna make you seduce me in your hour of need, babe Jimmy: it ain't all about him though Jimmy: I wanna see you Janis: I know Janis: it's been so shit being back Janis: worse than I reckoned Jimmy: & so quick Jimmy: I thought we'd have time to take a fucking breather at least Janis: yeah Janis: no chance Janis: nan had to kick mum out earlier it was such a farce Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: I didn't even ask Jimmy: sorry Janis: no big, I ain't asked how work was either Janis: I wouldn't speak to her, did my best not to listen either so meh Jimmy: still Jimmy: we don't have to do this Jimmy: now or ever Janis: I wanna Janis: not like, this is exactly how I'd choose to spend my saturday nights wanna Janis: but if you have to then I'm gonna Jimmy: I get it, you wanna see what Bob chooses when I let him dress himself no saying nah to nowt Jimmy: same Janis: 😂 Janis: I'm sure it'll beat whatever the fuck dad of the year would put him in Jimmy: he'll probably wear something of mine & whatever you've left on my floor Jimmy: he don't hate us for going like Cass does Janis: how pissed is she Janis: like do I need to wear protection from salad forks too Jimmy: not as bad as she was when she worked out mum was gone Jimmy: but as close as I've seen her Janis: shit Janis: like, knew she would but still Janis: how are you making it up to her, got a plan yet? Jimmy: I don't know where or how to start Jimmy: my room is trashed which is 👍 Janis: 😕 Janis: we'll brainstorm Jimmy: & I don't mean Gracie don't know what to wear, I mean my door won't close 'cause it's been booted Jimmy: tah for stepping in on that one, Ian Jimmy: A+ parenting Jimmy: bribes ain't gonna work this time Janis: might've helped Janis: the mature response Janis: we'll think of something, swear Jimmy: wouldn't be surprised Jimmy: like I won't be when nowt works to sort this Jimmy: playing happy families with whoever the fuck she is ain't gonna help Janis: I'm sorry Janis: I shouldn't have let you come Jimmy: you'd be sorry if you tried to stop me Janis: 🔪or 😭 Jimmy: I'm serious Jimmy: I wanted to come Jimmy: I needed to Janis: I know Jimmy: I can't be her brother, her mum & her fucking dad Jimmy: she's old enough to get it Janis: yeah, but she ain't old enough to leave herself Janis: like I get it Janis: when my brothers and sisters got to leave I hated them Jimmy: & I get it Jimmy: I hate my mum for that Janis: yeah Janis: but you came back Janis: so she can't stay mad forever Jimmy: it don't mean shit when she knows I wanna go again Jimmy: that I will Janis: you're not gonna just desert them though Jimmy: how she sees it is I don't love her enough to stay which makes me as bad as my mum Jimmy: worse 'cause I was there for that Janis: she knows it's more complicated than that though too Janis: even if she hates you for that it's still true Jimmy: yeah but she also ain't cut her hair since 'cause she got one the day before Jimmy: she's a kid still Janis: yeah Janis: so are you Jimmy: piss off am I Jimmy: I don't get to be Janis: how long can you cope with being mum, dad and brother so she gets to keep being one, even a bit Jimmy: as long as I have to Janis: okay then Janis: then we'll find a way to make her believe and know that Jimmy: easy to say Jimmy: fuck knows how we're gonna do it Janis: well no Janis: but we got time Janis: she ain't beyond hope yet Jimmy: can you just Jimmy: be here now Janis: um not to be a dickhead but not right now Janis: give me about half an hour, then I can Jimmy: okay Janis: had to go home, ain't I Janis: got fuck all here Jimmy: I would buy you new shit to avoid that Jimmy: you should've said Janis: nah, it's fine, I can be stealth Jimmy: such an athlete yeah I know Jimmy: always going on about it you Janis: you know you ain't been complaining Jimmy: only 'cause you'd fight me & you're so 💪 Jimmy: can't handle the loss right now Janis: better shh then, boy Jimmy: alright Janis: you know we ain't taking nothing but Ws tonight Jimmy: yeah Janis: teamwork Janis: okay Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: I ain't forgot Janis: it'll be shit but for him too Janis: realistically the best I can offer Jimmy: shitter for him than the rest of us is all I want Janis: 👍 Janis: lbr, me being there = night ruined so Janis: anything else is 🍒 Jimmy: it'll be interesting to see how he tries to handle you being there when she is Janis: gotta ascertain if she too, is a casual racist, I suppose Jimmy: Cass wants to bring her mate & he ain't white either so Jimmy: you're getting close to surrounded, Ian 💔 Janis: and when you're the foreigner Janis: headfuck Jimmy: exactly Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: what would buble do, dad? ask yourself Jimmy: already accepted him as his lord & savior Janis: is he a racist Janis: damn Janis: what a loss 💔 Jimmy: don't you have like a little book of racists in your house Jimmy: I was hoping you'd know Jimmy: should cover the 'celebs' at least Janis: a who's who of who to avoid Janis: sadly not Janis: how 'woke' are you now, lads Jimmy: gap in the market there Jimmy: crack on, babe Jimmy: get even richer Janis: what you chattin' Janis: omw to getting disowned here Jimmy: all the more reason to get busy with it then Jimmy: I ain't funding no #lavish life Janis: 😱 Jimmy: should've backed Pete 🐎 Jimmy: be his groupie by now if you'd grafted Janis: well you did kind of ruin that for me Jimmy: well I'm giving you a second chance Jimmy: 🎣 him from the CG I have Jimmy: I know how to graft Janis: yeah? Jimmy: he starts next week Jimmy: get your shit together Janis: I bet you just told him there was fit girls that work there Janis: who am I to ruin his job satisfaction Jimmy: It ain't my fault he'll be 😍 for my esteemed pink haired colleague after one shift Janis: 😒 Janis: shut up Jimmy: come on, he's actually got a type Jimmy: & when he hears her sing he'll be 🤤 Janis: I said shut up Janis: so rude Jimmy: 💔💔 Jimmy: get some vocal coaching & a box dye Jimmy: you've got time Janis: I can sing fine Janis: it's not hard Jimmy: me too but fine ain't 🤤🤤 Jimmy: you've got the nose ring already that's 1 point Janis: 😑 Janis: don't test me 'cos I have to come Jimmy: do yourself a tattoo while you're home you'll be well away Janis: I'm ignoring you now Janis: good day Jimmy: so mean you Jimmy: I'm being well helpful towards getting you on Pete Janis: you gave me false hope then snatched it away, you mean Jimmy: how? Janis: oh pete's gonna work with me again oh wait I've lowkey whored a bitch out for it Janis: 😒👌 Jimmy: you said that, I never Jimmy: she's got a boyfriend remember Janis: and he had a girlfriend, last I heard Janis: what's that matter, obviously Jimmy: I like working with 'em both Jimmy: that's it Jimmy: let me have my #dreamteam Janis: save me the love letter Janis: you're gross Jimmy: but I wanna write you one Jimmy: bit rude Janis: no you don't Janis: you wanna write pete and whatserface one on the back of a to-go Janis: you massive 🤓 Jimmy: yeah I do & no I don't Jimmy: if I tried to write one on their skin the way I do to you, I'd get sacked for a start Jimmy: or need a longer break than I'm allowed Janis: 💀 Jimmy: baby Jimmy: come on Janis: don't baby me, dickhead Jimmy: please be my BFF again 💕 Janis: literally have never been your bff Janis: Twix's only Jimmy: 😱 I'm wearing my half of the necklace right now Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: wounded me Janis: lied for the jewellery and I'll do it again Janis: kinda girl I am Jimmy: brutal you Janis: you started it Jimmy: I started nowt Jimmy: like I told you, I was trying to help you ride Pete off into the sunset Janis: mhmm Jimmy: scroll up if your memory's gone Janis: my memory is fine Janis: you want him to be your work bff Jimmy: just 'cause they both annoy me less than the 99% of other colleagues and customers I ain't gonna buy them necklaces & form a #squad Janis: likely story Janis: 👍 Janis: got form, you Jimmy: you don't count Jimmy: broke all my normal rules for you Janis: really Jimmy: obviously Janis: hmm Jimmy: you know it, don't be pretending you need to think on it Janis: hold on Janis: I'm here, wish me 🍀 Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: not that you should need it Jimmy: 🥇 at being stealth or not Janis: [suitable amount of time later] Janis: ugh Janis: they're being so extra right now but I styled it out and took as much shit as I could so Jimmy: 👍 Janis: be with you now then Jimmy: okay Janis: that was fun Janis: do you think my nan and granddad will let me stay 'til we can go Jimmy: you can stay here if not Janis: who's gonna 🔪 me in my sleep first, like Jimmy: they'll get me first it's alright Janis: oh so I have to watch you die, lovely Jimmy: already 👻 me remember Janis: fair, he really would keel over if we pretend I need to move in 'cos my fucked up family Janis: no styling that rage out Jimmy: I'm not pretending Jimmy: you can Janis: shit's gonna be hard enough with Cass for you, I ain't gonna do that Janis: but thanks Jimmy: shit's always hard Jimmy: stay with me Janis: we're always together anyway Janis: we'll work it out Jimmy: I'll get a bigger bed if you want Janis: you're so Janis: stop Janis: probably should for the sake of your back Janis: to be fair Jimmy: say you'll stay Janis: okay Janis: I'll stay Jimmy: you promise yeah Janis: I promise Janis: 'less your Da literally calls garda or something Jimmy: alright then Jimmy: 'cause he won't Jimmy: too shit scared I'll let 'em know that he smacks me about Janis: and he needs you to wanna stick about, like it or not Janis: fuck it Janis: you want me to, yeah Jimmy: I ain't only saying it for you Jimmy: I'm that dickhead Janis: I love that dickhead Jimmy: I love you Janis: I love you so fucking much Jimmy: it's gonna be alright, like it'll be shit but I'll make it okay too Janis: me too Janis: I'll get a job and all and we can save and yeah Jimmy: I'll get another job Jimmy: now I ain't on the clock as your fake boyfriend I can have two again Janis: lowkey feels like you're just tryna best me but okay 😏 Janis: #illget3 Jimmy: I have loads of money saved from before & now Jimmy: some of its for the kids but Jimmy: not all of it is Janis: yeah? Janis: we can make this work Janis: I ain't just saying it Jimmy: me either Jimmy: I promise Jimmy: I'll show you when you get here, there is loads but I've not counted it properly for ages Jimmy: be that nerd for me, tah Janis: do my best Janis: should've probably paid more attention in maths but remember that much Jimmy: my northern education don't go beyond counting to 10 so Jimmy: have a better crack than me Jimmy: need my #dreamteam to hand out the change Janis: 😂 Janis: poor boy Janis: not to be fucking depressing about it but Janis: this is the first time I've felt Janis: hopeful Janis: since Janis: yeah Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: you know I do Jimmy: I feel it Jimmy: I'm not gonna let you down, I swear Janis: I know loads of stuff is still fucked but Janis: it's like Janis: not entirely helpless, with you, us Jimmy: loads of stuff is always gonna be fucked but I'll make you happy still Janis: you do Janis: that's all I wanna do for you too Jimmy: you do Jimmy: I don't know how to explain how fucking massive it is that I even wanna do that for you, never mind that you can do it for me Jimmy: without sounding like a dickhead Jimmy: but I'd given up ages ago on that Janis: yeah Janis: I get it Janis: I really didn't like anyone, you know Janis: it's the truth Jimmy: I know Janis: but you just Janis: I dunno why it happened or how Jimmy: It don't matter Jimmy: I'm just glad Jimmy: I didn't like anyone either, I don't Jimmy: I love the kids but I also hate them 'cause of everything they make me do Janis: understandable, think anyone would Janis: in your shoes Jimmy: there's no room for like in that Janis: no time either Jimmy: even when I thought I loved my ex I didn't like her loads of the time Jimmy: couldn't Jimmy: she was just Janis: not enough of a dickhead? Jimmy: too much of one Janis: colour me offended Jimmy: she was just another mess for me Jimmy: you've never been that Janis: but if I move in Janis: won't I be doing that Jimmy: I take care of you, you take care of me Jimmy: it's mutual Jimmy: not like here's my mess carry it for me while we pretend you ain't holding your own too Janis: yeah Janis: okay Janis: that makes sense Jimmy: I can't remember her asking me a question Jimmy: about me I mean Janis: known plenty of people like that Janis: I guess, you wanted that, at first, yeah Janis: easier Jimmy: yeah except nobody else does either Jimmy: just you Jimmy: you asked me why I don't answer 'em there's the answer to that Janis: yeah Janis: well I am a notoriously nosey bitch so Janis: never stop, me Jimmy: I like it Jimmy: you Janis: good Janis: don't fancy sharing a single bed if you don't, tbh Janis: awkward Jimmy: I said I'll get a bigger one, don't need to beg Janis: 😏 Janis: I hear you though, you know Janis: even if I ask questions and then don't know what to say back Janis: I still give a shit about the answer Jimmy: even when my mum was about she never asked me how I was or school or nowt like that Jimmy: at least you try Janis: fucked, really Janis: that's what fills live up, the questions, however boring or throwaway Janis: for normal people, like Jimmy: nobody in my fucked up family wants the answers Jimmy: even Bobby knows not to ask and he's 6 Janis: then it gets so you only talk when something unavoidably fucked has happened Jimmy: or not even then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: yeah Janis: hm Jimmy: just preparing you for what a barrel of laughs it's gonna be for you living at my house Janis: don't worry Janis: not like I won't fit right in Janis: so much you're gonna be booting me out sharpish Jimmy: never Jimmy: if you're going, I'm going Janis: promise Jimmy: I'll swear on owt you want Jimmy: Ian's balding head Jimmy: Cass' growing rage Jimmy: name it Janis: 😂 Janis: I love you, Jimmy Jimmy: 'course you do Jimmy: best boyfriend ever Janis: mhmm Janis: I see no lie Jimmy: as soon as we get a bigger bed we're gonna have a kid & a dog in it & be no better off Jimmy: that's what I'm seeing Janis: you just scared the shit out of me 'til I realized who you meant Janis: well you know Janis: least they still love us Janis: gotta keep 'em on side Jimmy: inviting 'em off the street, in you come lads 👌 Janis: also no, but that is about as batshit an idea, yeah Jimmy: batshit'd be right Jimmy: that's my life, girl Jimmy: welcome & tah for the RSVP Janis: 😏 Janis: least it's different from my own Jimmy: get famous off the comic strip won't I & you'll really love me then Janis: that is what I'm after Janis: fame and money Jimmy: your #thirst for Pete is blatant so I'm aware Janis: firstly I loved him before I knew he was in a band Janis: and he'll never be famous or rich, he's the bassist Janis: how many bassists do you know Jimmy: 1 & that's him Jimmy: but I'm antisocial that don't count Janis: exactly, it's him and Paul friggin McCartney Janis: who I would never bang Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: he was the bassist Janis: right Janis: you didn't even know Janis: proves my point Jimmy: fuck me Jimmy: my world is rocked Jimmy: & not by his bass notes Janis: I know, it's less clout than the drummer Janis: at least at a glance you can tell the difference between a drum and a guitar Jimmy: I'd only fuck George always or Ringo now 👴💕 not that you asked Jimmy: bit rude Janis: I'm sorry but I respect your choices Janis: probably would John 'cos he was a massive dickhead and just my type so Jimmy: I ain't growing my hair for you Jimmy: will stay in bed though Janis: will need that bigger bed Janis: they were not doing that in a single Janis: fuck peace then, eh lads Jimmy: what else do we need in my room though really Jimmy: floordrobe Jimmy: done Janis: exactly Janis: my life is in this bag Janis: was gonna find a squat for you, not that picky Jimmy: just train the dog not to piss on it all & we're 👌 Janis: genuine q Janis: what are we doing for a door tonight Janis: as yours is fucked Jimmy: shit Jimmy: maybe we can bodge it some way Janis: yeah, sure we can Janis: i'm a pro Janis: my brother is always breaking things, doors included Jimmy: but like if we're got the kid & the dog in, Ian's downstairs & Cass is probably pretending I drowned at the beach so Jimmy: not as much of an issue as it sounds Janis: true true Jimmy: which brother Jimmy: the deaf one Jimmy: or the other one Janis: other one Janis: kind of a savage, don't tell Ian Janis: he'll be buzzing Jimmy: he would love that Jimmy: so secret's safe Janis: so many stereotypes being met Janis: thanks lads Jimmy: he asked Cass if she was a lesbian Jimmy: might also be a homophobe Jimmy: we're doing great here ourselves Janis: 👍 Janis: only one of ours is Janis: some of the others say they're bi but you can ignore that 'cos it's not real Jimmy: 🤞 she is to fuck him off Jimmy: he calls Bobby by girls names all the time 'cause he says he is like a girl for crying & shit Jimmy: give the man another 🏆 Janis: ain't old enough to be claiming that shit as generational Janis: no matter how northern you are Jimmy: our kid has got loads to cry about Jimmy: I say let him Janis: why not Janis: save a fortune on doors Jimmy: think it through Ian Janis: does it help Jimmy: what Janis: crying Janis: do you think Jimmy: it don't do fuck all for me Jimmy: but nowt does other than you Jimmy: still happens sometimes Jimmy: you just Janis: can't help it Jimmy: or you think maybe it'll help just that once even though you know it's bollocks Janis: and what do you have to lose Jimmy: exactly nowt Jimmy: like I'm gonna call Ian's bird mum all night, don't have to remember her name & get to make it weird Janis: oh God Janis: that is funny, even though I should feel sympathy 'cos you did that to me Jimmy: if you wanna sit next to her & commiserate about the Taylor's, go on Jimmy: not stopping you Janis: gonna find out how well suited she is to Ian first Janis: but tah Janis: love some #sisterhoodsolidarity me Jimmy: as long as you still sit next to me Jimmy: do what you want Janis: obviously Jimmy: I'm not doing your sister's double dating seating plan bollocks Janis: 🙄 Janis: don't Jimmy: if I can't touch you under the table I'm not staying sat down Jimmy: hill I'm dying on tonight Janis: damn Janis: noble cause Jimmy: there's only so many 🚬 breaks we can take even if they do annoy the birthday boy Janis: don't he smoke? Jimmy: he's a hypocrite of course Janis: he could quit any time yeah Janis: ugh Jimmy: he might do for her 🤞 the damage is already done Jimmy: if I get cancer & he don't, fuming Janis: my God won't let that happen Jimmy: your god that don't exist yeah Janis: that's the one Jimmy: 👌 Janis: he don't wanna upset me Janis: trust Jimmy: that's just good sense Jimmy: your bad side is like Jimmy: I ain't even finishing the sentence is how it is Janis: wise Janis: 😒 Jimmy: come here I need you Janis: I'm near Janis: couple more stops I think Jimmy: but be nearer Janis: I'll take over the bus, hold on Jimmy: good Jimmy: it's about time Janis: what am I like Janis: not appreciating you at all rn Jimmy: anyone would think you were still faking it Jimmy: no effort Janis: no one ever thought I was faking it Janis: 'cept you Jimmy: I didn't Jimmy: I've told you loads of times you weren't that good, babe Janis: 😑 oh please Janis: you thought I hated you Jimmy: please what, pretend that you didn't want me so badly & it was so obvious Janis: UGH Janis: turning this bus 'round Janis: gonna do the normal route, like Jimmy: you won't Jimmy: nowt's changed you still want me so badly & it's still so obvious Janis: shut up Janis: least I weren't that obvious Janis: could've got in real trouble, perv Jimmy: you weren't that obvious to who, baby? Janis: I hate you 😣 Jimmy: so much, I know Janis: hmpf Janis: like you were so 😎 dickhead Jimmy: always am Janis: 👌 Jimmy: go on, when weren't I Janis: when have you ever been? 🤔 Janis: real question Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: you were mean first Jimmy: still waiting for you to give me an actual example of me ever not being 😎 as fuck Janis: I don't know why you wanna be mortified Janis: by your shameless past thirst Jimmy: I know why you can't think of one & you're playing for time Janis: might not have been that long but you've packed in loads of 🤓 Jimmy: sounds like an excuse that Jimmy: no shame in not being able to come up with one Janis: 🙄 Janis: what about every time I've beat you at everything Janis: for starters Jimmy: letting you win is #goals & therefore 😎 Janis: you ain't once Janis: liar liar Jimmy: that's what you think 'cause I'm good at faking it, unlike you, babe Janis: firstly you were awful at it Janis: why do you think it went by the wayside so fast Janis: secondly how do you know I'm not still faking it #longcon Jimmy: I told you, 'cause you wanted me so bad & it was so obvious Jimmy: which is the same reason I know you ain't faking nowt now Janis: the Lord is testing me Janis: thought this dinner was meant to be the hard part Jimmy: I said you were hot from the off, that's how 😎 I am, alright Janis: peppered in with many, many insults Janis: sure Jimmy: I meant them as well like Jimmy: 💕 Janis: 💋🍑 Jimmy: 😂 Janis: such a pisstake Jimmy: you love it Janis: hmm Jimmy: & me Janis: yeah Janis: more fool me Jimmy: it's a top move, smart girl Janis: you sound like a teacher Janis: not a mood Jimmy: but I don't have coffee breath & I'm here to meet you off the bus so Janis: it's a start 😏 Jimmy: you'll know when I start Janis: I hate it when you're right Janis: even a little Jimmy: no you don't Janis: 😩 Jimmy: me knowing what I'm doing is as good for you as it is for me Jimmy: I'll show you Janis: fuck Janis: [off the bus like hey] Jimmy: [picks her up to get her away from the other people getting off like excuse us] Janis: ['they might think this is a grabbing, you know'] Jimmy: ['I'll take my chances either way' sits down on the bus shelter seat with her in his lap like always so a make out can ensue] Janis: [telling him how much she's missed him in between breaths 'cos always true and saying how bad she wants him 'cos true now] Jimmy: [he can't look at her because he's been crying on & off throughout this day & convo cos he's soft & it's been a one but hiding that as best he can with extra kisses & touches & words spoken into her neck or shoulder or wherever] Janis: [all the comforting touches and holding him so tight with all the ilys ever] Jimmy: [saying it back & trying to pull her closer to him than he's probably ever, soz about it] Janis: [touching his face and looking right at him like 'you're so perfect for me'] Jimmy: [says 'you' but the softest & quietest] Janis: ['you, baby' hugging him like it's been a lifetime 'cos today lowkey has] Jimmy: [the tightest & longest hug they both need with soft kisses that get less because like you said, what a day & desperation is allowed] Janis: ['please tell me we've got time to be alone one last time, like'] Jimmy: [nods because he'd make time if they didn't] Janis: [soft but needy moan into his mouth 'cos you know, thank God] Jimmy: [literally does whatever he can to make her do that again because] Janis: [saying his name over and over under her breath] Jimmy: [says 'fuck' but we know its a moan really who are we kidding boy] Janis: ['please'] Jimmy: [shamelessly going as hard as he can here & now 'cause he don't wanna move yet & lbr they've done more public places at this point] Janis: [soz world but they need to so, not even soz for how much noise she's barely toning down here] Jimmy: [likewise him cos when is he ever chill about anything] Janis: ['this is- you're everything'] Jimmy: [gives her so many 'you' s & her name like shh but don't] Janis: [when this just encourages you to go harder but at least you're bitey so you aren't as loud] Jimmy: [and what you give you get back so we're all having a good time] Janis: ['make me cum, I couldn't without you earlier, I was so...'] Jimmy: [can always go harder & will because what more encouragement could he need honestly] Janis: ['scuse her, now all the neighbours probs know his name] Jimmy: [excuse him because intense eye contact forever & he's not being any more subtle so] Janis: ['you're actually killing me'] Jimmy: ['I know you can take it'] Janis: [unholy noises] Jimmy: [being even more extra like see, I told you you could handle this & also this] Janis: ['Baby'] Jimmy: ['it's alright' the most intense kissing ever because why not thanks bye] Janis: [the most needy kiss she'd have ever lbr and clinging onto his neck] Jimmy: [the most important of ILYs after] Janis: ['I love you the most anyone has loved anyone ever'] Jimmy: [has to just kiss her & hold onto her because the emotions bitch] Janis: ['I lost count though'] Jimmy: ['I don't mind'] Janis: ['doesn't bode well for my accountancy career but it was mostly your fault so'] Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [smiling 'no one has ever felt this good, just me'] Jimmy: ['what about me?'] Janis: ['I hope it feels even half as good for you too'] Jimmy: [is just smiles & heart eyes cos obvs & god bless these two] Janis: [snuggles for a time 'come on then, let's go fuck shit up'] Jimmy: [tries to snuggle in more/shamelessly hide cos doesn't want to] Janis: ['I know, baby but it'll be alright, promise.'] Jimmy: [starts kissing her anywhere & everywhere so she won't wanna go either cos cheeky like that. 'it's alright here'] Janis: ['It's more than alright' the but don't need to be said 'cos duh 'when do we have to go?'] Jimmy: [keeps being very distracting but gives her a vague answer like 'we're got ages'] Janis: [is dubious but ain't that bothered obvs 'fashionably late is fine but can see your house from here so'] Jimmy: [carries on because trying to make a round 2 happen here as if they don't have somewhere to be. 'All I'm bothered about is if they can hear us from here.'] Janis: [has to kiss him 'cos the noise is too real] Jimmy: [so many kisses because he's such a clingy bitch we know & it's only slightly less needy than before obvs] Janis: ['I love you'] Jimmy: [says it back of course & how much he does] Janis: ['why the fuck do I wanna cry though?' is loling but hiding too] Jimmy: 'Baby'[makes her look at him because hands in her hair but gently though. 'Today's been...' he don't need to finish that sentence cos we know. 'it's alright'] Janis: [pulls his hands to her lips and kisses them, before moving them down 'cos wants to forget that moment ever happened and fast] Jimmy: [that's fine by him cos he's done enough crying for everyone today thanks] Janis: [enough talking yo] Jimmy: [enjoy lads cos its downhill from here cos actually do have somewhere to be in a bit] Janis: ['I need to get changed' whilst making no effort to move] Jimmy: [him too obviously but shrugs and just keeps snuggling until his phone rings. He don't answer it but we know who it is & why] Janis: [leaves it 'til the second ring before getting up, pulling him up with her] Jimmy: [handholding on the short walk back to his & as soon as he gets there it's time to sit on the doorstep & 🚬 cos we're gonna make Ian late & annoyed kids] Janis: [goes in and gets changed, awkward, least Twix and Bobby will be vaguely happy to see her] Jimmy: [eventually comes in & gets Bobby sorted out with whatever his hilarious outfit is gonna be, taking his time & even playing with Twix cos that's the mood] Janis: [comes down in some bomb Ian angering lewk and joins in] Jimmy: [is obviously distracted by how fucking good she looks excuse him] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [😏] Janis: 👍 Jimmy: [is a mixture of 😍 & 😳] Jimmy: you look Janis: idk what's pissing him off more, your reaction or the actual 'fit Jimmy: either way 🥇 Jimmy: any chance you packed a dress for me, that'd really wind him up Jimmy: or skirt, not fussy me Janis: 😂 Janis: you'd look hot Janis: he's just jealous Jimmy: he'd 🔪🔪 for these legs, babe Jimmy: so did you or am I gonna have to find the most 'fuck you dad!' outfit from my own wardrobe Janis: have a look what takes your fancy, babe Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: you coming or staying with 💕🐶 Janis: coming, obvs Janis: 🐶 probs gonna come too though Jimmy: [picks Twix up and carries her like a baby because we're annoying Ian not cos he loves her or anything shhh] Jimmy: let's go then Janis: [takes picture 'cos ha got you and 😍] Jimmy: [puts that little pup on his bed & flops down too cos don't wanna do this but she's loving him cos good egg] Janis: [comes and lies down with 'em, just stroking his hair but Twix gets jealous so also loving upon her, 'course] Janis: [oh idea, it should be the club outfit for the throwback feels 'cos not just about killing you, Ian] Jimmy: [little group snuggle pause cos they need it] Jimmy: alright fuck this Jimmy: [still hasn't moved even though] Janis: come on Janis: make yourself look fit or ridiculous Janis: that's the choices Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [finally does start getting ready because have to at some point] Janis: [just perving and chilling, gets a messages but ignores it] Jimmy: [comes back to the bed as soon as because she really does look GOOD and it's distracting so make out session much to Twix's annoyance soz pup] Janis: ['good choice, babe'] Jimmy: [before he can answer the front door slams which means Cass is also back which is gonna be fun for all the fam] Janis: [squeezes his hand comfortingly] Janis: here we go Jimmy: [everyone can hear her kicking off at Ian downstairs so obviously he has to get up & go sort that leaving her with Twix and Bobby who has also come in cos not about this drama] Jimmy: one sec Janis: 🍀 Janis: [just having a chat with Bobs about the fam 'cos he loves and it's not painful at all lol] Jimmy: [just can hear everyone shouting for a bit which is delightful & then Cass comes upstairs & slams her bedroom door & he comes back up not long after] Jimmy: [gets busy immediately making sure Bob is alright cos what else can he do or say like] Janis: [is realistically even less use and defs gonna keep quiet 'cos no comment needed rn] Janis: need a sec? I can go 🚬 Jimmy: he's alright Jimmy: that's round one Jimmy: loads more to go Jimmy: [tells him to go get Twix a treat though to keep them both busy] Janis: 👍 Janis: his blood pressures already through the roof looks of, no one's lasting 'til dessert, like Jimmy: oh didn't I tell you the plan was 🔪💀 Janis: didn't Janis: and bit rude to spring murder spree on a girl but 👌 Janis: I'm down Jimmy: one bloke ain't a spree, my love Jimmy: but alright we'll hit your house next & make it one Jimmy: since you're down Janis: so pedantic always, my dear Janis: but such a romantic with it 😍 Jimmy: we'll be getting the summons to head off soon Jimmy: let's go 🚬 Janis: aye aye Jimmy: [carries her down the stairs cos if it winds up Twix it annoys Ian & off they go outside] Janis: [is 😏 'til they outside] Janis: ['you're gonna do your back in, you know'] Jimmy: ['you ain't that heavy, calm down' & he proves it by sitting her back on his lap cos fave & they both need the closeness to get through this shitshow] Janis: [rests her head on his chest so she can hear his heartbeat, 'why are parents the worst people in the world?'] Jimmy: ['might just be ours' & shrugs then lights a 🚬 but not his own yet cos obvious a bit in his thoughts like] Janis: [shakes head but just smokes in silence for a bit, 'Mia should have a kid, or make one of her underlings who is still physically able, like'] Jimmy: ['you're gonna wanna take that back 'cause you know she'd ask your sister & make you be auntie to it'] Janis: *[makes puking motion, 'not being an auntie to the actual ones that exist, never mind satan's spawn'] Jimmy: [does 👍 IRL] Janis: ['is Cass' mate coming or?'] Jimmy: [shakes his head. 'Dad of the year said no'] Janis: [tuts like 'course, 'shoulda just showed up, kid'] Jimmy: ['if you want your thunder stolen, girl, yeah'] Janis: ['obviously not, massive attention seeker, me' gestures at the outfit 'cos ur welcome, Ian and Mrs Ian 'but you know, might get her in a slightly better mood, 'cos that I can't do right now'] Jimmy: [can't help staring cos she's drawn attention to how fucking hot she is again so don't mind him he's shamelessly 🤤 like has he even heard the 2nd bit of what she said lol] Janis: [pushes him, but gently 'cos don't also wanna fall here 'don't disagree then, dickhead! actually fishing there, for once'] Jimmy: [is looking at her like ?? cos was too distracted to even, soz bout it] Janis: ['least do something about it if you're gonna look at me like that, boy'] Jimmy: [a kiss like he wanted to give her when she first wore this outfit but obviously couldn't so] Janis: [is now the one shamelessly 🤤 don't get too comfortable lads, does the blowback thing to him this time for them mems too] Jimmy: [so much intense eye contact when he's not also staring at her lips or her body like somebody stop him you can't hook up again here & now lads there isn't time or opportunity but damn] Janis: [makes frustrated noise and pushes him again, still gentle, but mad about it] Jimmy: [kisses her again to try & get some of the frustration out cos same girl but not really gonna help is it boy] Janis: ['this is gonna be the longest night ever, isn't it'] Jimmy: [nods because all he can do in his frustrated state & also all he has chance to go cos finally time to go so there's that interruption I imagine Ian's girlfriend awkwardly appearing like 'ahem'] Jimmy: [okay so the idea is JJ go with her cos they'd need two cars to fit everyone & that way they can be basically alone cos ignoring the gf when Ian ain't there plus if Jimmy was in a car with his dad they'd get killed/end up in a car wreck + this way it's more 'fun' for Ian cos Bobby would be whinging since he's JJ's biggest fan & Cass would be annoyed that he's being annoying on top of the mood she's already in. Enjoy fella} Jimmy: [oh & I nearly forgot he sends her a fire sext as they are getting in cos the combination of sexual frustration + that outfit is such a throwback so it's like everything he would've done then & everything he's gonna do cos she's his now so basically the hottest one to date not soz] Janis: [just dying in this lady's car like] Janis: really Janis: first you spring a spree on me Janis: now you straight up kill me Janis: and just Jimmy: [just know he is sitting in the middle so he's closer to her to be that dickhead & also doesn't have his seatbelt on which is blatantly gonna make this poor woman be like 'ahem' again when her car alerts her at some point but for now, gotta use the extra movement available to kiss her neck & collarbones cos they are so #exposed in that top & if you wanna talk about dying babe like & also touching her boobs cos they're also out I remember, excuse me lady] Jimmy: not yet Jimmy: but it can be a 💀💕 note yeah, 'cause it is my masterpiece Jimmy: if you want Janis: you are so Janis: 😣 Jimmy: go on, compliment me Jimmy: what do you wanna say Janis: you're the biggest dickhead I've ever met Jimmy: cute 💕 Jimmy: so romantic you Janis: don't call me cute 😡 Jimmy: or what you're gonna fight me Jimmy: have a go, she ain't my mum but she might turn this car around Janis: yeah I wish Janis: not that 🍀 Jimmy: yeah you are Jimmy: [points at himself like you got me cos such a nerd] Janis: how are you the same person Janis: does someone ghostwrite your sexts for you Janis: and can I meet 'em Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Jimmy: [puts his seatbelt on cos 1. the poor woman be like can you just & 2. offended at the bae being rude] Janis: hey Jimmy: ? Jimmy: [is doing a pouty face exaggerated] Janis: baby Janis: [cups his chins] Jimmy: [kisses her cos can't even pretend he don't wanna] Janis: [how painful it'd be to not go hard rn, 'scuse you lady] Jimmy: [he would anyway cos lowkey forget she exists soz woman] Janis: [having to be like no no for your own sake 'fore it gets too real] Jimmy: [at least it isn't a long car ride] Janis: you're mean you are Jimmy: I'm nice me Jimmy: what are you on about Janis: nope Janis: starting things you can't finish Janis: rude Jimmy: we can finish Jimmy: just be quiet Jimmy: easy, yeah Janis: 😑 Jimmy: you're really gonna turn down such a simple challenge right now Jimmy: 👌 girl Janis: I didn't say no, did I Jimmy: still waiting for the yeah though, aren't I Janis: now he's being considerate Jimmy: you trying to outmean me when I ain't even being Jimmy: top one, babe Jimmy: 🏆🏆🏆 Janis: I am not Janis: you'd know if I was being mean, babe Jimmy: just come here Janis: [when are you not on his lap] Jimmy: [eyes on the road lady you don't need to see none of this] Janis: I missed you Jimmy: I missed you more Janis: [shakes head] Jimmy: [nods] Jimmy: Can't you feel how much Janis: [makes little noise despite trying really hard not to] Janis: Baby, please Jimmy: [kisses her so he don't make any noise himself except into her mouth cos he's not as good at this we know] Janis: you meant it, yeah Janis: when you said you'd touch me under the table Jimmy: I don't say shit I don't mean Jimmy: not even to piss him off Janis: good Janis: 'cos I want you, not just to piss him off Jimmy: [more kissing & touching cos he wants her too literally always & Ian ain't even here rn] Jimmy: I love you, not just 'cause it pisses him off Janis: I know Janis: not that good an actor, babe Jimmy: [is being saucy as hell] Jimmy: let's see how good of an actor you are Janis: fucking Janis: fuck Janis: challenge accepted Janis: I've got this Jimmy: [is 😏] Janis: [kisses his smirky mouth 'cos] Jimmy: [bites her lip cos needs to bite his own rn really but less fun] Janis: [know for a fact wheever they're going ain't gonna be that far away and you're gonna be even more frustrated] Jimmy: [literally not gonna take a 6 year old on a long drive to a restaurant when they are everywhere are you so think on lads] Janis: [is so grumpy when they gotta get out lmao] Jimmy: [likewise & then literally all I can imagine is them trying to go to the bathroom together when they get there but then Bobby's like I wanna go too so cockblocked] Janis: [from the ladies oh kids] Janis: your brother is cute and everything Janis: but I ain't sharing my dessert with him now Jimmy: he can have mine already lost my appetite when I caught this bird making 😍 at Ian Janis: such a catch Janis: but control yourself, please Janis: have some decorum Jimmy: I give it 10 before Cass bounces a bread roll off both their heads though so Janis: nothing like kids to kill the mood Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: outside it is then he can't follow us to smoke til he's at least Cass' age Janis: your dads gutted his lady is too #classy for that Jimmy: I'll invite him just to watch him have to say no Janis: 💔 Jimmy: I know you are but I'll make it up to you Janis: how, got something stronger on you? 😏 Jimmy: come with me & find out girl Janis: [duh, how rude honestly lads but yolo] Jimmy: [when Ian is fuming and they ain't even looked at the menu yet lol] Janis: [alone at last for however long you can realistically 'fore Ian drags you back in] Jimmy: [at least they don't long with how turned on they both are, you're welcome Ian] Janis: [coming back to the table like it ain't dead obvious ok] Jimmy: [when your dad makes you go up the bar with him to get the drinks so he can have a go at you without his missus hearing lovely] Janis: [the most awkward table ever] Janis: tell him his inside voice could do with some work Janis: heard that bit then Jimmy: I'll give him a smack in a sec that'll shut him up Janis: bars pretty crowded, could say he got elbowed in the face or summin' Jimmy: tah babe Janis: jus' sayin' Janis: back you up Janis: or I could come elbow him in the face Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: go on then Janis: I have changed my mind anyway Janis: defs making it a triple Jimmy: you can also cover me while I pour extra sugar into my brother's juice Janis: 👍 Janis: already blowing her mind over here Jimmy: 'cause he's chatting & she's never heard him before or 'cause he ain't & she thought they were over that bit 💔💔 Janis: first onw Janis: he's missed you Jimmy: & you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: well reckon he can count as my favourite person in this shithole, when you ain't about so Jimmy: mine too Jimmy: unless Barry moves over, of course Janis: well I'll console poor Bobby in that eventuality then Jimmy: & Pete is pretty high on my list of faves, soz our kid Janis: 🙄 I know but if you mention her my elbows are gonna get confused Jimmy: who? Janis: I don't know her name but I can be descriptive if you really want Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: you should've caught it so you could stalk her socials Jimmy: some 🔥 pics of me in my uniform Janis: ignoring you now Janis: goodbye Janis: we're having a great time over here Jimmy: yeah? Jimmy: 👌 Janis: yep Janis: so much fun Jimmy: you ain't got better at faking nowt have you, my love Janis: like I'm here to be being nice and sociable Janis: would have invited your other girlfriend for that Jimmy: yeah I would Jimmy: [comes back with the drinks] Janis: [down it] Jimmy: are you telling me to piss off again or just having that much fun Janis: 🤷 Janis: could be both Jimmy: [downs his drink too] Jimmy: come back up the bar with me then Janis: [does] Jimmy: what do you want, lightweight? Jimmy: don't have to be same again Janis: 'cos mixing is sensible 😏 Janis: whatever though Jimmy: tonight it is Jimmy: & why you're here, like Jimmy: my other girlfriend can hold her drink better Jimmy: no fun for the family in that Janis: look Janis: here to fight Ian, not you Jimmy: then don't Jimmy: [pulls her in for a really good kiss moment] Janis: stop being a dickhead then Jimmy: teamwork Jimmy: I promise Janis: mhmm Jimmy: [kisses her again to prove that he means it] Janis: come on then Jimmy: we could just leg it Jimmy: should Janis: you mean you don't want me to get shitfaced now Janis: make up your mind Jimmy: if you could let me know what kinda drunk you're gonna be Jimmy: I will Jimmy: 🤞 for fun & nice to me Janis: already established that's your other girlfriend, haven't we Jimmy: could be both Janis: why would it be Jimmy: why wouldn't it Jimmy: I'm so nice & fun Janis: [rolls her eyes and starts heading back to the table] Jimmy: [pulls her back cos he is that dramatic. 'Do you want me to get down on my knees in this restaurant too. A fake proposal is just what this family dinner needs & Ian ain't showing no signs of stepping up with his'] Janis: ['do you want me to actually slap you or' pulling him forward like come on] Jimmy: ['been there before & you wouldn't, remember'] Janis: ['well I'm full of surprises'] Jimmy: ['prove it'] Janis: ['I'm no more gonna slap you in the middle of this restaurant than you're gonna fake propose so shut up'] Jimmy: ['then you better say yes 'cause that sounds like a challenge to me, babe & I've never not accepted'] Janis: ['do not'] Jimmy: [is 😏 'you're right I'll do it at the table, more of an impact. Tah babe. You always have top ideas.'] Janis: ['cos you really want your entire fam to witness that L, alright' shaking her head like gimme strength as they go back] Jimmy: [shrugs 'gotta tell them you're moving in anyway, can carry you over the threshold this way, can't I. The romantic in you'll love that.'] Janis: ['how you reckon you're getting a yes and a slap, idiot?'] Jimmy: [I know you so well, Juliet'] Janis: ['you wish'] Jimmy: [shakes his head cos he does know her & we know it & gets comfy in his seat] Janis: [dranking] Jimmy: [likewise but also trying to find something Bobby will eat cos this ain't the cali gaff & he's being deliberately fussy cos don't wanna be here & we know Cass is too but can't pick for her] Janis: shoulda gone for something themed Janis: less choice Jimmy: you wanna see me in the outfit or you wanna wear the outfit Jimmy: either way 👍 Jimmy: missed a trick Ian Janis: what you chatting Jimmy: if there's a theme, no half measures Janis: I meant like Janis: nandos, or a burger place 😂 Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: that's me, babe Jimmy: [nudges her playfully] Janis: why are the kids menus always so much better Jimmy: order off it Jimmy: he ain't your dad he can't stop you Janis: 😂 Janis: tah Jimmy: so welcome Janis: better remind her not to get the salad Janis: yeah you look #skinny but you'll end up with spinach in your teeth Jimmy: there's all that #femalesolidarity you always say you don't give a shit about Jimmy: get her to order something heavy on the garlic 💔 gutted Dad Janis: she defs didn't ask for this Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: makes all of us that Janis: 🤷 obvs not Jimmy: [back to the bar for more drinks excuse him] Janis: not getting an invite this time, alright Jimmy: so you need one every time, alright Janis: brb Janis: [🚬] Jimmy: no invite for no invite then, yeah Janis: reckon we both need a sec, yeah Jimmy: 👌 Janis: come have one if you want Janis: know this ain't about me and it's more shit for you and whatever but I can still need some space, can't I Jimmy: I said alright, didn't I Jimmy: two's a crowd, I get it Janis: whatever Janis: I knew this was a bad idea Jimmy: nobody said it was a good one Janis: 👌 Jimmy: if you wanna go, just go Jimmy: you don't need to be here Janis: you want me to Jimmy: is that a question Jimmy: I said if you want Janis: it's a question Jimmy: I want you to stay but Jimmy: if I don't want to then Janis: then I will Janis: not like anyone wants to be here Janis: but you asked Jimmy: leaving would piss him off more than owt we've done yet Jimmy: maybe we should just Janis: do you wanna, like obviously but Janis: is it worth it or do you wanna stick it out and just ruin the night some more Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: we could try letting Cass in on it, might make her hate us less Janis: worth a shot Janis: even if she's still mad with us, also permanently with him so Janis: text her Jimmy: one sec Jimmy: alright she's in & coming outside with me so hang on Janis: 👍 Janis: no one can resist being a dick to their 'rents Jimmy: or the lure of 🚬 take that 🚭 Jimmy: not that I'm gonna really let her but Jimmy: [comes out & has brought her drink with him cos good boy like that] Janis: so uncool, babe Jimmy: piss off Janis: [winks 'cos cheeky and takes drink and kisses his cheek] Jimmy: [Cass comes out just as he's kissing her properly cos typical so she's like 😒🤢] Janis: [makes a whoops soz face like] Jimmy: [is 🚬 & Cass is brainstorming out loud about pissing Ian off, first one being kicking Bobby under the table so he cries & Jimmy has be like probably don't lol] Janis: [lols 'cos 100% something she'd have done to grace] Jimmy: [Jimmy's like also encourage him to fuck shit up though like drawing on the table, kicking off, not staying put etc typical kid things that will annoy Ian] Janis: [She's like 'you should facetime your mate in the middle of food, like' to Cass] Jimmy: [actually gets a smile out of her before she remembers she hates them cos great idea] Janis: result Janis: [victory sip] Jimmy: [cheers' her drink with a nod that they should probably head back in, in a sec. Cass goes & does kick bobby 'accidentally' as she gets in her sit cos cool kid who don't have to listen to you Jimothy] Janis: [Ian shoulda ordered for them 'cos they 'weren't here' such a dickhead move] Jimmy: [Jimmy sets Bobby up doing art but he's still whinging cos nobody's trying to stop him rn except Ian who can't] Janis: just like you Jimmy: nah better Jimmy: I've told him to draw the gf so 🤞 it's unflattering or that'll backfire Janis: kids drawings always are Janis: they don't sugarcoat it Jimmy: the one he did of my dad was 🥇 Janis: mhmm Janis: tell him I'll pay him to do you later yeah Jimmy: tell him yourself he loves a chat with you Janis: dunno why Jimmy: SUCH a conversationalist Jimmy: [meanwhile Cass is name dropping their mum & talking about her to make Ian & the gf uncomfortable cos that would work amazingly but poor Jimmy is likewise feeling tense af] Jimmy: I'll be back in a sec Jimmy: [leaves the table again it's like musical chairs bitch] Janis: 👍 Janis: sure thing Jimmy: [is not back in a sec] Janis: lost, or purposefully 'lost' Janis: the starter sharing thing is here Jimmy: Ian would be devastated to have to eat my share, I'm sure Janis: there's only so much defensive eating me and Cass can do 'fore we chunder Janis: you alright? Jimmy: I just Jimmy: she did that to get at me too, you know Janis: probably Janis: she isn't doing it now, you can come back Janis: or I am can come to you, for a bit Jimmy: [comes back] Janis: [squeezing his hand under the table] Jimmy: [gets an eyelash for her but we both know it's just an excuse he's just soft] Janis: [real smile, real moment, sod everyone else] Jimmy: [smiles back & it's genuine too even though he's obvs still a sad boy] Janis: just tell me what you need, yeah Janis: anything Jimmy: you Jimmy: that's it Janis: seems bit too easy Janis: but alright then Janis: if you're sure Jimmy: don't be calling yourself too easy babe Jimmy: that's a bit rude Janis: 😏 Janis: bit true Jimmy: it's actually well untrue before me Janis: oh really Janis: #yourinfluence Jimmy: exactly Janis: 🙄 don't be cocky Jimmy: it's what you like about me though Jimmy: are you sure Janis: only sometimes Janis: and not about devirginizing me, tah Jimmy: it weren't my fault I did that Janis: not really about fault is it, div Jimmy: just saying you could've worn a badge or whatever Jimmy: sign round your neck that kinda thing Janis: [kicks him in the shin] Janis: you're such a dick Jimmy: oi 💔💔 Janis: don't oi me Janis: your fault Jimmy: I didn't do owt except point out you didn't look like a massive virgin Jimmy: which is a compliment Janis: you and compliments Janis: someone needs to re-explain to concept Jimmy: go on then Janis: okay, hold on Janis: [takes a large swig of her drink for effect] Jimmy: [shakes his head for effect] Janis: so, a compliment, is when you say something nice about a person Janis: not when you say something rude af and then add in some half-baked 'but I meant-' after the fact Janis: got it? Jimmy: say it slower & in a northern accent Janis: 😏 Janis: just stop trying with them, yeah Janis: that's a compromise I'm fine with Jimmy: 👌 Janis: then you can't get moody at me about it either Janis: win win Jimmy: or you could just accept 'em like I want Jimmy: that'd be a win win Janis: oh sure Janis: I'm so hard up I need 'didn't look like a massive virgin' Janis: 👌 Jimmy: alright it weren't my best one Janis: 😂 Janis: like I said, dickhead Janis: and clearly I didn't or you would've clocked it Jimmy: It weren't like I was looking for badges or neck signs Jimmy: unless one said like 🐇🍳 or 🔪💀 not gonna put me off Janis: oh tah Janis: 'cos it was such a big undertaking for you Janis: so much hassle Jimmy: shut up Janis: you said it, boy Jimmy: what are you on about Jimmy: no I never Janis: yeah you did Janis: why would it put you off Janis: not a disease Jimmy: it wouldn't Jimmy: which is what I said Janis: hmm Janis: easy to say now Jimmy: easy to say then too Jimmy: you know how bad I wanted you Janis: I weren't frigid alright Janis: it was just timing, that's all Jimmy: that dickhead made it clear, tah Janis: yeah Janis: well Janis: don't think I was waiting for someone special or anything weird Jimmy: I don't Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [let's all take a moment to appreciate the food Ian has ordered as it arrives] Janis: oh yum Janis: swap with me Jimmy: [does but is 😒 and all wtf is this out loud at Ian & then swaps with Cass like musical plates] Janis: Imma get one of those stupid big sundaes for dessert Jimmy: be quick about ordering it before my dad has a go for you first though Janis: I don't think he'd be ordering me one full stop Janis: why'd he get you all meaty shit and me a salad Janis: is he calling me fat 'cos that's just inaccurate, buy me a burger to fatten me up if anything Jimmy: sexism Jimmy: or being a tight bastard Jimmy: maybe both Jimmy: he could've got you nowt like you don't exist I suppose Janis: 😂 Janis: would've been funnier Janis: and then I coulda got something decent Jimmy: [just voicing all these complaints and more to Ian to annoy him while Cass 'eats' the salad by dramatically gagging etc & then nicking Bobby's plate which is a big drama] Janis: [takes the salad back to be mature about this, casually sharing meals here] Jimmy: [takes it off her & gives her his for good because love bitch] Janis: 💕 Jimmy: [Cass doing her facetiming before Ian has a chance to calm down lols] Jimmy: now that's 💕😍 Janis: deffo Janis: kinda feel usurped Janis: but it's cute Jimmy: you're cute Jimmy: [kisses her, not sorry Ian or his missus] Janis: actually so competitive Janis: I like it Jimmy: I know you do 💪🏆 Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt remember Janis: 'course Janis: how could I forget Jimmy: I ain't letting you Jimmy: [kisses her again even better] Janis: promise I didn't need it but Janis: never gonna turn down a reminder Jimmy: [draws the 👌👍's  on her leg with his finger cos that's always a mood] Janis: [holds his hands there for a while 'cos wanna] Jimmy: [writes ILY there too but like over and over cos extra] Janis: [kisses him 'soz everyone but not] Jimmy: [he's lowkey dying cos always does when she kisses him first but still not soz everyone] Janis: [Cass be gagging again] Jimmy: [throws salad at her cos v mature & lbr he don't wanna eat it] Janis: [feeds him some of hers like a romcom to really make everyone vom] Jimmy: so #goals Jimmy: you're gonna make my fake mum 😭 Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: having the evening she wanted for her Janis: #livevicariously Jimmy: #realitycheckbeforeitstimetowriteoutarealone Jimmy: [Bobby going so hard with the fake voming that he nearly chokes for real god bless] Janis: gonna actually 💀 with our love Jimmy: you just can't stop being 💕 Janis: does that mean you can Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: does that mean you want me to or you don't Janis: why would I want you to stop Jimmy: don't love a rom com you Janis: like I said, you ain't got it down so Janis: not too offensive Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [Ian dad of the year that he is decides to take Cass' phone cos still facetiming so that's all kicking off & is lovely] Jimmy: let's not go back with them, alright Janis: yeah Janis: alright Janis: we can go anywhere you want Jimmy: I don't care, I just Jimmy: want it to be us for a bit Janis: easy Janis: you're definitely owed at least a few hours of not thinking about Janis: any of this Jimmy: or anything Janis: exactly Janis: can give you that Janis: promise Jimmy: I'll give it you back too Jimmy: promise Janis: I know Janis: you always do Jimmy: [writes 'you' on her leg & a heart cos he's soft] Janis: [draws a heart on his but then a cross through it 'cos not soft her, nah] Janis: if you could live anywhere, like semi-realistically Janis: when you leave Janis: where would you go Jimmy: as long as it ain't back where I came from, I don't mind Jimmy: I ain't been nowhere else before here Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: yeah Janis: I dunno either Janis: don't matter Janis: just not here Jimmy: easy done Jimmy: nowhere too hot though I'm too white & northern for that shit Janis: but you love short shorts 😂 Jimmy: yeah but pink ain't my colour babe Jimmy: nevermind 🦀 red Janis: 😍 will see me through Jimmy: be offering to suncream me up & doing 🎨 on my back Jimmy: 🍆 like Janis: not that predictable, how dare 😉 Jimmy: know what you're about Janis: getting to be really thorough with your sun care, yeah Janis: but I'd be way more creative Jimmy: yeah? Jimmy: what's your masterpiece gonna be then Janis: gonna just write northern twat probably Janis: or call for a good time Janis: possibilities are endless, babe Jimmy: 😂 Janis: probably stick with english speaking countries, you struggle enough as is Jimmy: that's your fault Jimmy: distracting me in every paddy lingo class I've ever been in & dragging me outta half my french ones Janis: okay, that can be my fault Janis: worth it and you know it Jimmy: you are Jimmy: you know it Janis: shut up Janis: got a no compliment rule remember Jimmy: make me Jimmy: it's a fact Janis: dork Janis: if I make you how you wanna he might actually keel over legit Jimmy: you agreed to 💀🔪 already so Jimmy: go on Janis: but I wanted dessert 😋 Jimmy: you still can Jimmy: my new mum will be alive Janis: sticking 'round to bury him and buy the milky bars Janis: what a babe Jimmy: & if she gets mardy 'cause he ain't a handsome corpse well Jimmy: you got me Jimmy: I'll get it Janis: thought you was offering yourself as a sexier corpse Janis: true but unnecessary Jimmy: sexy 👻 lad me Jimmy: ain't offering myself to her though tah Janis: don't Janis: she's no MILF Jimmy: she ain't got no kids unless Ian's offering to change that one way or another Jimmy: but I doubt tonight's the night either way Jimmy: even if he does stay alive Janis: mood #rekt babe Janis: no more brothers or sisters to raise, thank you Jimmy: 🎻🎻 for Ian's lost redemption arc only Janis: gutted Janis: #adoptdontshop Jimmy: now the 🐶's gutted 💔💔 Janis: poor baby Janis: truly Jimmy: 🤞 she's trashing the house & doing her bit Janis: would she do a thing like that Janis: 😇 Jimmy: you trained her so yeah Janis: my evil plan Jimmy: 😈 you Janis: [gives him a saucy look] Janis: don't forget Jimmy: [touches her under the table in a saucy way] Jimmy: don't forget what a perfect match we are Janis: [breathe, bitch] Janis: not gonna let you off that easy Janis: you're stuck Jimmy: nah Jimmy: I'm exactly where I wanna be Jimmy: [keeps touching her to prove his point] Janis: good Janis: I'm Janis: not mad about it either Jimmy: encouraging Jimmy: never off as my #muse you Jimmy: I'm so inspired right now Jimmy: [proves it] Janis: tough job but someone's gotta Janis: if you wanna be 🥇 Jimmy: & you know I do Jimmy: [is 😏 because peak under the table saucy behavior happening rn like] Janis: [casually grabbing his leg 'cos harder to be subtle than she reckoned] Jimmy: [gives her an innocent look like ?? while going harder than before cos he's so cheeky] Janis: you know how much I hate you Janis: yeah Jimmy: so much Jimmy: just don't make it obvious to everyone else Janis: I'm trying Janis: go easy on me Jimmy: if that's what you want, baby Jimmy: [is being a tease now lol] Janis: you're so Janis: 😑 Jimmy: say what you wanna say Janis: when can we leave Jimmy: as fast as you can order & eat the pudding you want Jimmy: that's how soon we can get out of here Janis: Baby Jimmy: ? Janis: I don't want it now Janis: you gonna make me sit here and eat a whole sundae when we could Jimmy: I was gonna make you share it with me actually but Jimmy: we can go Janis: you can have whatever you want, baby Jimmy: I only want you Janis: then let's go Janis: piss him off anyway Janis: height of rudeness Jimmy: I ain't offering to pay owt either Jimmy: he'll be 😭😭 Jimmy: come on Janis: [being blase af like toodles! lmao and essentially running for the door with him] Jimmy: [leg it lads] Janis: [dramatic af smooch outside 'cos love and they're free] Jimmy: where to then Janis: anywhere we can be alone Jimmy: [more kisses just because] Janis: ['I love you'] Jimmy: [says it back obvs] Janis: [says well done etc 'cos knows that was rough] Jimmy: [says tah & we know he really means for being there cos there's the look of love bitch like don't cry again boy] Janis: [shrugs like don't mention it and more kisses but more soft] Jimmy: [then some handholding & walking because gotta go somewhere kids] Janis: ['pub?'] Jimmy: [nods] Janis: [happy dork like 😊] Jimmy: [stops to kiss her again because she's so cute & happy & he can't not] Janis: they should do studies Janis: on how depressed parents make you Janis: I feel 10x better already being away from mine and yours, like Jimmy: [does a little lol but obvs same] Jimmy: when we get our own place, no keys for none of 'em Janis: don't even tell 'em where we are Janis: give 'em no chance to just pop 'round Jimmy: not like we need help with moving 💪 Janis: [also lols] Jimmy: [looks at her as if to say what are you laughing for I'm so strong & picks her up to show off] Janis: [rolls her eyes and is like 'here we go again' but loves it and is loling even more] Jimmy: [make out sesh to 'shut her up' but actually just wants to cos the lols get him] Janis: [look of love bitch] Jimmy: [we need a piggyback moment here so they can get where they need to be, run boy] Janis: [destination Janis: okay 💪 lad Janis: get the first 'round in Jimmy: [does] Jimmy: find us the loneliest corner you can, yeah Janis: 👍 Janis: you forgot who I am again? Jimmy: 'course not Jimmy: the name's Janet, right? Janis: think that was your da's bae, legit Janis: 🙄 thanks, mum and dad Janis: you dicks Jimmy: [lols I hope she can hear it from where she is while he's still at the bar & its not that loud] Janis: 💕 you cute as fuck Janis: I'd try and pull you if I saw you standing there, like Jimmy: go on then Jimmy: have your best crack at it Janis: seriously? Janis: require more chatting up than an actual boyfriend you do Jimmy: challenge refused? Jimmy: alright Janis: challenge? 🤔 Janis: #slag Jimmy: worked in your favor didn't it Jimmy: if we both played as hard to get as you, you'd still be a virgin & I'd be 💔 Janis: bit rude Janis: not my fault your chat is shocking Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: my sexts killed you, ain't my fault you want everything Janis: challenge refused? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: [is 😒 as he brings the drinks to her] Janis: [kisses his cheek and takes drink as per] Jimmy: [pouty boy be drinking] Janis: ['Baby'] Jimmy: [looks at her like ??] Janis: [smiles at] Janis: like that Janis: don't be grumpy Jimmy: [is trying his best to still be in a mard but she's so cute when she smiles that he can't help being 😍 every time] Janis: [its returned so] Jimmy: [kisses] Janis: ['even more like it'] Jimmy: [gestures that she should get even closer to him because standard] Janis: [snuggles into his side, head on his shoulder] Jimmy: [plays with her hair forever cos absolute fave mood] Janis: how can I miss you when I've been with you Janis: other people ruin it somehow, always Jimmy: there's your answer Jimmy: but when they try & ruin it for us we ruin it for them twice as much so Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: [little lol] Janis: true enough Jimmy: [more kisses cos of the cuteness of the lol] Janis: maybe next time we go, we could take the kids, win her back 'round Janis: at least temporarily Jimmy: [a genuinely happy big smile because that's a good idea] Janis: [shrugs like nbd] Janis: caravan's always there, like Janis: no one uses it much now Jimmy: [nods to downplay how KEEN he was just then lol] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: depending how much of a shit her little mates 'rents give, he could come Janis: then we only really have to look after Bobs Jimmy: reckon she'd talk 'em round easy even if they are actual parent of the year candidates Jimmy: long as she ain't gone off him by then Janis: subtle hint, babe Janis: keep me on my toes Jimmy: [little lol of his own] Janis: ah to be 12 again Jimmy: you're alright tah Jimmy: didn't know you then Janis: awh Janis: whatta smoothtalker Jimmy: just how it is Jimmy: life was as shit then as it is now basically Jimmy: you're the only diifference Janis: yeah Janis: things were slightly worse Janis: in theory anyway Jimmy: I'm taking that compliment Jimmy: nowt you can do to stop me Janis: fill your boots, lad Janis: know you need all the help you can get 😉 Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: [tickles her like excuse you] Janis: [punchy] Jimmy: [play fight moment] Janis: gonna get us kicked out, boy Janis: know it's rare you make it in, come on Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: that was one club one time Jimmy: if you'd told me you wanted me to dress like Jimmy: that Janis: [loling] Janis: I dunno if that would've worked entirely in your favour either, like Jimmy: it would've worked on you Jimmy: give a fuck about whoever else Janis: is it? Jimmy: deny it Jimmy: you'd have been well 😍😍😍 & 🤤 Janis: [makes 'psh' noise but ain't denying it] Jimmy: [gives her such a hot look] Janis: [rolls her eyes] Janis: it weren't no gay club Janis: that would've kinda defeated the point Jimmy: anywhere's a gay club if you want Jimmy: ask Barry Janis: would've been easier to spin that than random bitches, like Jimmy: they're easy enough to spin too though Janis: shut up Janis: idiot Jimmy: [is 😏] Janis: [is 😒] Jimmy: what's that face for? Janis: yours Jimmy: yeah you are Jimmy: so calm down Janis: piss off Jimmy: [pulls her closer to him as an unspoken no] Janis: mean it Janis: [but doesn't pull away] Jimmy: I mean it Jimmy: you're mine Jimmy: I wanted you then & I want you now Janis: [looking at him intense af] Jimmy: [holds her gaze as intensely of course] Janis: ['you're so'] Jimmy: [says ILY] Janis: [more desperate kissing] Jimmy: [puts her on his lap for more kisses because its been a minute & that's unheard of for them so] Janis: I still like you Janis: even though you are a bit of a dickhead Jimmy: you're the dickhead Jimmy: but I still like you too Janis: nah, don't lie Janis: you more than like me Jimmy: maybe Janis: definitely Jimmy: & you tell me not to be cocky Janis: come on Janis: you said it Janis: you want me so bad Jimmy: alright Janis: is that denial or agreeance Janis: can't tell Jimmy: I reckon you can Janis: [makes noise 'cos indecent] Janis: yeah but Janis: you know I like hearing it Jimmy: yeah but Jimmy: if I say it again what are you gonna do about it Janis: [gives him a look like 'do it and find out'] Jimmy: [tells her out loud giving her a LOOK the whole time] Janis: [after hot n heavy makeout, pulling on him like come on 'cos privacy needed] Jimmy: [don't need to tell him twice, on you go you two] Janis: [lowkey forgot the point of this convo lmao off you go into the night babes]

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Nancy

Rio: You know Rio: If you like, I could sleep with Mr. Tomlinson Rio: Take the heat and shine off you all in one, just ask Nancy: It's a kind offer Nancy: But it's not gonna fix any of the important stuff Nancy: And it's not like you deserve any of what would come from that unholy union Rio: Okay, you could give me names of the worst offenders and I'll sort them out Rio: not in similar fashion to teach, of course Rio: How are you really though, babe? Stupid question but gotta come Nancy: You can't take on half the school, Rio Nancy: If it was that easy I'd still be in London Nancy: Maybe it's a stupid question but I've only got an obvious answer so Rio: Sure I can Rio: Ain't my first rodeo Rio: Is there anything of actual use I can do to make everything not totally shit or? Nancy: Don't be nice to me Nancy: I can't handle it Nancy: And I just re-applied my make-up Rio: You ain't wronged me Rio: along with half the School, like but they LOVE taking shit personal when 10 minutes ago it was Quinn who? Rio: And we've all put our waterproof to the test before Nancy: If it was just her I wouldn't be thinking about leaving Nancy: Tristan literally has half the school on his side and it's not like I can blame him Rio: It's just insecurity Rio: 'cos you're not a total sadcase like the kids she usually works with, can't pick on them for loving on his Ma or swinging at her whatever Rio: he's just taking out his blatant issues about it 'cos he ain't had the chance before Nancy: Am I not? What would you call me? Nancy: Yeah, bit like how I was with his dad Nancy: At least he's got real issues, I've got...imaginary emotions? Or something Rio: Hmm Rio: I might throw hopeless romantic at you if I'm feeling really savage Rio: Nah, they ain't imaginary Rio: How much easier if they were Nancy: Hopeless is right Nancy: But I doubt either Sian or Quinn would call me romantic Nancy: Well, they weren't real. None of it was Rio: Not the fantasy in your head but the feelings were Rio: you can try and discredit them if it helps but in my experience, usually a pointless exercise Rio: but painful enough to feel somewhat fitting of a punishment, right? a start, at the very least Nancy: Ouch. Calling it a fantasy sounds....yeah let's not Nancy: I know you've got a point, that I should have let you make earlier Nancy: God, how did I let myself end up here Nancy: What the hell Rio: Sorry, as if the world wasn't ready to burst your bubble, like Rio: Shit happens Rio: You can't control it Rio: Arguably could've controlled it enough to not get to that point but I ain't got room or desire to judge too harshly Nancy: It's fine, I've heard worse from the world Nancy: I can though. I had been Nancy: Or so I thought Rio: 'Til you didn't Rio: exactly Rio: It's done now, the rumour mill will do it's thing, then you'll be free to deal with the actual mess in your head Nancy: It's his fault Nancy: The prick Nancy: I wouldn't have lost control if he didn't first Rio: Yeah Rio: She sounds devious Rio: Why her, like Nancy: He hates me and so does she Nancy: Match made, like Rio: He doesn't hate you, babe Rio: He's just an idiot Nancy: Okay, he hasn't forgiven me then Nancy: Point is, he's mad at me Rio: At least you've got reason to be mad at him now too, yeah? Rio: Fair fight Nancy: Like I need a reason, he didn't have one Rio: Yeah, not how he sees it though Rio: maybe you can get it all out there now Nancy: He sees things to suit him Nancy: Always has Nancy: Everything about her was right there for him to see before I left and after Rio: Yeah, it's fucked up Nancy: I shouldn't have to spell it out to him, he was right there Rio: I know Rio: I don't think it's like that Rio: like it's still shitty Rio: but it's not like, love Rio: he ain't like that, if nothing else, thank fuck, yeah Nancy: It doesn't make me feel any better Nancy: There's always girls around him, he didn't need to get with her Nancy: All their friends remember, they tagged me, so he can't have forgotten what she's like and everything she did Rio: He looked wasted Rio: in her photos Nancy: Lesbian or not, I know if he was that wasted he wouldn't have been able to get it up for her Nancy: It's not an excuse Rio: Let's not think about the logisitics Rio: it's not personal, physical reactions Nancy: You can say that, it doesn't matter to you Nancy: If he's so mad at me for moving to Dublin he shouldn't sleep with one of the main reasons why I had to Rio: Have you said this to him yet? Nancy: Fuck no Nancy: And I'm not going to Nancy: He knows what she did, he didn't stop it, whatever I didn't ask him to, but he still had a front row seat Nancy: She made sure everyone did Rio: Wouldn't it make you feel better, to rip him a new one? Nancy: Not really Nancy: I've tried enough times before Nancy: And she's the least of my worries now that half this school hates me and the other half loves me in a way I don't want, ever Rio: I can hear the threesome offers from here Rio: Ugh Nancy: Like, I get it, I'm a cliche, let me list the ways for you but then go away Rio: Keeps your inbox fun and fresh, I guess? Rio: Is it gonna be hate or love, know the feeling Nancy: I haven't even asked how you are! Nancy: Letting myself down in all the ways Rio: Oh God, same old, same old, no need to depress yourself further Nancy: Not to be like my brother and his (lack of) coping mechanisms yet again, but can we go out? Nancy: I'm over being staring at my walls or my phone crying or trying not to Rio: 'Course Rio: you're allowed to drown your sorrows at least 3 more times 'fore I'm calling you out on the parallels Rio: Anywhere with cheap drinks and GRL POWER bops? Nancy: Anywhere that my haters won't be Nancy: Because now I've called them haters which is the WORST thing Rio: 😂 Rio: May as well call 'em motivators whilst you're at it and be done with it Nancy: Sounded like a soundbite from my mum's mouth Nancy: That's the last straw. I wanna die Rio: Not before you've got a 'round in Nancy: If you come and help me not look how I feel then I'll owe you so many drinks Nancy: You'll be able to get as drunk as Buster, fuck everything up too Rio: I do owe you for the time I shamelessly stole your wardrobe so Nancy: You're literally trying to remind me and I still don't remember Nancy: So you're fine Rio: Still omw Rio: I've rocked many a makeover in my time, though it's been a while since any of 'em but Grace would let me 😂 Nancy: I have no energy to fight you Nancy: And can't look worse than I do right now Nancy: The bar is low low low Rio: Slap some cucumbers on those puffy eyes Nancy: Excuse me mum I need to take those from your water really quick, babe Nancy: 👌 Rio: When plain old water just ain't hydrating enough Nancy: @ my dehydrated but still crying self Rio: Dry it up, babe Rio: Gotta at least arrive at the club semi put together Nancy: Are they gonna let me in? Nancy: I can't do any more humiliation today Rio: Of course, you're nearly 18 anyway Rio: they let Indie in, you're fine Nancy: Tell it to Sian Nancy: And the powers that be so they don't sack her Rio: 😑 Nancy: If we're going out you need to work on your poker face Rio: I'm sorry but I'm not gonna cry for her, babe Nancy: You sound like the rumor mill Nancy: none of this is her fault Rio: Mm, she could've done more about it Nancy: She didn't know about it, what could she do? Rio: You reckon? Rio: She's a married woman and you probably weren't that subtle Nancy: You're talking to me not my brother Nancy: I can be subtle Nancy: I've had years of practice Rio: Not with love and shit Rio: No offence but you know it's true Nancy: Yes with love and shit Nancy: She didn't know until I wanted her to Rio: Okay Nancy: You don't believe me, do you? Rio: No but there's no need to push the issue Rio: you can't know either way now Rio: but they won't sack her Nancy: You should Nancy: You say I can't, but I do know, 'cause I've been over every moment in my head Nancy: I wish she did know, before, and she felt the same as I do but that's not gonna happen Rio: Yeah, and every time you go over it, the memory changes Rio: Sorry but you're not a trusted source on this Rio: especially 'cos you still wish that Nancy: I know Nancy: I can't just stop loving her Nancy: Everyone wants me to, even her, but I don't know how to Rio: Yeah Rio: Time, that's about all that'll do it Rio: or someone else Nancy: Did time work for you? 'Cause been there tried the second option already Rio: 'Course Rio: heals all wounds don't you know Nancy: I can't say I do know that yet Nancy: I'm still angry and hurt about Chloe and Buster so Rio: That's allowed Rio: got a decent amount of time left on both before people are eye-rolling Nancy: You think? It's been years since I left Nancy: I should be over it Rio: Nah Rio: she's still the same bitch Rio: why should you try and be above it Nancy: 'Cause I came here to change Nancy: So I shouldn't be the same bitch Nancy: It's pathetic, right? Rio: No, 'cos you weren't the bitch to begin with Rio: You don't need to change Nancy: if the alternative is this Nancy: i want to Nancy: I hate this Rio: Okay Rio: How do you wanna be? Rio: Let's make it happen Nancy: where to start, like Rio: You tell me, babe Nancy: My extensive wardrobe doesn't include a chastity belt so I'm gonna need more self control Nancy: Any ideas? Nancy: Not an app for building that as far as I know Rio: Hmm, idk Rio: could get yourself on tinder, the awfulness of people looking for a quick hookup will do wonders for your sex drive Nancy: Lord Nancy: That's a scarily good idea Nancy: Anywhere where straight guys exist in numbers Rio: The club will be the IRL embodiment so tonight is your lucky night Nancy: Luck isn't on my side lately but i've got nothing to lose Rio: That's the spirit Rio: Might as well put all your chips down now Nancy: Keep my phone for me later? Drunk dialing Quinn at the end isn't gonna work out the way it did at the start Rio: Not yet anyway Rio: Time, yeah? Rio: You take mine, swapsies Nancy: Likely not ever Nancy: You didn't see her Nancy: But sure, your phone camera gets me Rio: Never say never Rio: unless it's your married teacher Nancy: Don't give me undeserved hope Rio: I dunno Rio: It's not like you were married, you know Rio: or you properly cheated Nancy: Yeah but that's only because I didn't have the chance Nancy: I was still thinking about Sian most of the time Nancy: That's gotta hurt Rio: Bit insulting, yeah Rio: I wouldn't go back but maybe she liked you Rio: Either way, don't think there's anything you can do to make ammends rn so Nancy: She told me she liked me Nancy: And because I'm the worst human I didn't stop it Rio: Hardly Nancy: You're too nice to kick me when I'm down Rio: I ain't Rio: And I ain't above using someone for my own shit, not many are Nancy: I'm just as bad as him Nancy: Fucking twinning Rio: Different sins Rio: If you're gonna make like him, try not to give a shit about it, right? Take the perks with it Nancy: If only Nancy: At least he didn't like Chloe and use her anyway Nancy: That's just me and what I'm looking for in a girlfriend Rio: Oh, babe Rio: what a mess Nancy: Help me Nancy: Should I just go back to London or? Rio: Hmm, I don't know Rio: It'd maybe hurt less to not see either of them Rio: but you'd be more alone Rio: but, either way, it's a year and you're out of both Nancy: I don't know either Nancy: I wanna see them both so much and that's why I shouldn't be near either of them, right? Nancy: But June will murder me if I leave and I'll murder Buster if I have to share a house with him all the time again Nancy: Summer was Nancy: Oh God Rio: You're not a monster, you're allowed to feel that Rio: You aren't going to do anything else, the mistakes have been made, you're on learning time Rio: I can't really see London working, to be honest Rio: It'd be a step back, more than all...this Nancy: Yeah. I don't love it there. Closer to being at home here by far Nancy: I know I'm just scared to stay Nancy: But I need to girl up and stick it out, like Rio: Yeah Rio: We're all here Rio: that's a good % of the school pop so fuck it Nancy: 😂 real Nancy: be on your way faster 'cause whatever is closest or coldest in this fridge is being opened now Rio: 👍 Rio: Had to sort my own self but I'm in my car Rio: not looking a total state now, welcome Nancy: teach me how to make cocktails so I can make new friends? Rio: Ooh Rio: Fun Rio: Grandad gonna be pissed off but deal, old man Nancy: sorry but I need the gays to protect me now, granddad I can't wait for you to come over and be fabulous Rio: I'll invite some of my gay friends if you want Rio: not a hoe you out vibe Nancy: They'll back right off when they sense my 💔 so bring whoever you want Rio: See who's about and up for it Rio: first though, some tlc Nancy: If you bring a boy you like I'll promise not to gag Nancy: Or cry Rio: Trust, there are no boys making me gag or cry atm Nancy: Gross Rio: 😂 Nancy: And I assume disappointing? 🤔 Is that the goal, penis so big it almost kills you or? Rio: Oh honey 😏 Rio: I don't believe for a sec you're so 💔 that you're ready for the lowdown on the d Nancy: Trying to talk about you and your interests since I haven't shut up about me Rio: Sweet Rio: Maybe when I'm drunker myself I'll tell you all about it Nancy: Yeah? Nancy: So there's stuff to tell Nancy: Knew it Rio: Nahhhhhhh Rio: Not my own personal penis Rio: just the basics Nancy: Like basic teenage boys from your street or Ann Summer's basic range? Nancy: Either way, do better if I have to live through you Rio: Damn Rio: Pressure weren't real enough already, like 😜 Rio: Ma like, where's those grandkids @ Nancy: Like she wouldn't come at me with the same question Rio: We're all slacking Rio: for shame Nancy: Wait until she hears about my celibacy Nancy: Sorry auntie Nancy: I gotta do what I gotta do Rio: 'til you 👀 some cuties in the cloob Nancy: I'm giving myself to god Nancy: she's a babe Nancy: full nun mode activated Rio: You talking about Ariana Grande? Nancy: Never Nancy: I've got enough drama in my life without fancying a straight celeb Rio: Celebs don't count Rio: ask anyone, free pass, like Rio: off chance she's out in dubo tonight Nancy: It's 🌈 icons or nothing Nancy: But it's nothing, obviously Nancy: feel free to hit her up yourself though Rio: Picky Rio: I'm good tho, not really my type either Nancy: I could make a bunny joke but we don't need to get back into the Ann Summer's shelves Rio: Don't we? Rio: Celibacy ain't gon' be easy babe Nancy: I've done it before Nancy: First girlfriend, remember Rio: Pringle rules Nancy: Never say that again Nancy: Touches too much of a nerve, which in itself sounds dirty so Rio: 😂 Nancy: Don't laugh at me Nancy: Why did I have to ruin my life? Nancy: 😭 Rio: You had to know, yeah? Nancy: But I should've known anyway Rio: You'd always have a what if Nancy: Yeah but I've just swapped one for another 'cause now Quinn's a what if instead Rio: She's a has been now Rio: in the nicest possible way Nancy: Ouch Rio: Not a never ever though Nancy: Safe to assume Nancy: I wouldn't have me back Rio: Yeah but you're living up to your name rep rn Nancy: ? Rio: A negative Nancy Rio: sure that's not old Nancy: I was going on the McKenna part and I was like, how insulting is this gonna get? Rio: Too real for tonight Nancy: Too real for this month Rio: I'll allow it Nancy: Oh god, I'm gonna have to change all my birthday plans Nancy: Don't let me think about that Rio: Yeah, don't Rio: we'll sort something Rio: but I'm here Rio: pour me a drink and lemme in Nancy: 👌👌 Nancy: Excuse mum and dad's scowls Rio: 😬 Rio: Should I move my car lads Nancy: Back to the 24 and away from my bad influence I'm sure they'd say right now Nancy: not a direct quote Rio: I'll chat 'em round Rio: parents love me Nancy: 😏 Rio: Rude! Nancy: Hey, I'm preparing you for the kind of quality banter you'll have to get used to hearing if you hang around me Rio: Alright, the craic starts here Rio: deal with it, 'rents Nancy: 💚🍀