#hats and my art style do not agree

[itsjusteds]

2 months ago today I watched a revolutionary musical that completely changed how my brain functioned. I watched a marvelous piece of media that forever changed how I thought about things. That piece of media you ask? Well young Padawan I am talking about Spies Are Forever.

Hello I'm the artist who's saf brain rot is so strong that he's drawing EVERY saf character daily until he draws them all

Today's character is Richard "Dick" Big

Day 10/55

[punkitt-is-here]

Read These Frequently Asked Questions Before You Send An Ask!

Patreon | Ko-Fi | Youtube

Heyo! I get a TON of asks each day, so I'm making this post so that folks know what's already been asked so my followers don't have to see the same stuff over and over, haha.

Hi! I'm Punkitt! I'm a game developer, artist, editor, director, and a bunch of other stuff! I'm working on an RPG called Astral Guard, a platformer called Susan Taxpayer, and I have a couple more fun projects in my pocket like Happup and Super Mario Death Row.

Did you know you look like weird al?

YES jesus fucking christ i get told this every day. if u send me a message in my inbox saying i look like weird al im killing you with like wizard spells and shit.

Why do you have so many hats? Do you know you have that many hats?

ye i like hats. :) free tumblr badges for one pea i like one piece and took as many as i could. free.

Where can I find your art/game development/horsecomix?

Great question! Everything I make that's my own and not a reblog is under "my posts", every bit of art I do is under "my art", any game development I do is under "gamedev", you can find all my MLP art under "mlp, my art" or "horsecomix" for the best stuff. I also have an "animations" tag and a "shitposts" tab. I also properly tag all my asks to be asks and write out the asker's name, so if you don't wanna see those just mute the ask tag.

Do you have a Patreon or a Ko-Fi?

I do have a ko-fi here! I also JUST launched a Patreon, which you can find here :)

What do you use for your art?

I use FireAlpaca and Paint.net for misc. effects!

What are you using to make your games?

I use FireAlpaca do make my assets! Astral Guard, Happup, and any other top-down RPG games I make are all made in RPGMaker 2003. Susan Taxpayer is made in SMBX2 Beta 4, a Mario fangame engine with lua support!

Why are you using a 2-decade-plus engine to make games?

It's fun!

Do you have a sideblog or something for your art?

Not right now! What you see is what you get. I do have a sideblog for Astral Guard though, if you want to follow that game specifically! @astral-guard

Can I make an OC based on your work? ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!! THATS THE COOLEST THING EVER!!!! LET ME KNOW IF YOU DO!!!! I WANNA SEE!!!!

Can I do dubs/redraws of your comics? As long as you credit me! I get a ton of notifs each day, so if you wanna show me (and PLEASE i so do wanna see fun dubs and redraws!!!) tag me or DM me!

Can I use your art as a PFP? Sure! Just credit me somewhere. :D

Are you the one who trapped her coworkers in a room and made them listen to TF2 lore?

Yep! Everyone had a blast actually. :]

Did you make that comic where Fluttershy eats the weed brownie/Rainbow Dash has a male living space/someone has a cutie mark that says they'll kill Ronald Reagan?

Yep! That's me.

Where are you in MLP right now?

Currently just finished Season 7! Haven't watched the movie yet.

Have you watched Equestria Girls?

Yep! Thought it was super cute. I watched up to Rainbow Rocks and plan on watching more.

What's your opinion on MLP so far?

I love it! I think it's cute. I really don't agree that there was some sort of huge quality drop after season 2 or whatever.

What do you think of G5?

Not my style! I don't really like either animation types and it just seems like I'm not in the audience anymore. That's totally chill, but it just doesn't grab me!

Have you watched any other MLP stuff from previous generations?

Nope! But I did see a compilation called Minty Being Autistic for Six Minutes Straight that I loved. she's perfect.

Favorite pony?

Don't got one, I love all the Mane Six a LOT, but I'm particularly fond of Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity!

Favorite episode/season?

I'm so bad at picking favorites! But any season past Season 1 I have a blast with because I feel like it's just more my style. I don't have a favorite episode, but the most recent one I can remember LOVING is the one where Starlight bottles up her emotions because it was REALLY funny.

Do you like Pony.mov?

Nope! And stop saying my stuff reminds you of it, it's a lil annoying!

Have you watched the Mentally Advanced Series/Friendship is Witchcraft/Other fandom vids?

Probably not! My interaction with the MLP fandom prior to last year was pretty minimal, so I'm making my way through the show first!

What do you think of Fallout: Equestria?

I think it's super weird but really fun because of that. I've never properly read any of it but it's very fascinating to me.

Are you transgender?

Yep! I go by she/her, I'm a trans woman. Have been for many years, but I only recently came out online!

Are you a lesbian?

Nah, I'm bisexual!

Can I commission you?

Yeah! I only have my commissions available on my Ko-Fi at certain times though, so keep an eye out! I usually announce slots being open at least 12 hours beforehand. Slots are usually first come first serve, but we'll see.

Can I use your art as a Discord emote?

Yeah man i'm not scouring every discord on the planet to find stickers of my work. i think it owns if people take my stuff and make it stupid injoke emotes between friends that makes me very happy.

Can I send you an ask inquiring about gender dysphoria?

I feel like this is beyond my capabilities of advice! I'm actually very comfortable with my body and I have been for many years, so I don't know if I can give any good or helpful advice on that front. Apologies, but there are many resources out there where you can ask about those things if you look for them, like Discord channels!

Favorite Color?

I'm a sucker for blue!

Favorite coffee?

Can't drink coffee, my stomach is cringe.

Favorite tea?

I'm lame and can't drink most tea but I love this one orange-flavored tea a lot. I also LOVE ice tea.

Can I say you're horsegender/punkittgender/a little gender goblin void thing?

Well, I can't stop you, but I'm kind of beyond that phase now! I really am a boring ol' plain she/her girl, and I like it that way. It's not much, but it's honest gender.

What's your favorite game series?

Mother, Kingdom Hearts, Mario, and I USED to say Fallout, but I found out I'm really only a big Fallout New Vegas fan.

Favorite game from those?

Mother 3 is one of my fave games of all time! I love KHII, and I'm tied for SMB3 and SMW. Also Fallout New Vegas fucks hard.

Any other favs?

Bug Fables, SLARPG, and TF2!

Favorite Movie?

Everything Everywhere All At Once, no question.

Oh, are you going to college?

Yep! I'm a film/theater major.

Do you have a YouTube channel?

Yeah! Click right here for it, I stream there and upload footage of my games/animations/my film projects + other stuff.

What is that little orange creature I see?

That's bweenop, my little persona that I use when I'm feeling a little scrunkly.

Do you have a ponysona?

Yep! Her name is Star Magnolia, you can search her on the blog to see art of her.

When will Susan Taxpayer/Astral Guard/etc. be out?

No clue! I take things slow, that's just how I am.

How do you work on so many things at once?

I make small, satisfying amounts of progress! I never try to complete one giant thing all at once, I just like doing small bursts of fun stuff. I got ADHD, so I learn to work with it.

Did you know you look like Weird Al?

Im going to run you over with a clown car watch out

WHY do you work on so many things at once?

Fun! I like learning, I like making cool stuff, and I like showing it to people :)

Do you need any help with your projects?

Potentially! I'll probably put out a post asking for help if I need it.

If you could be a horse, would you?

You kidding me? Several ton beasts with the frailty of a sickly Victorian boy; my clumsy ass would never survive.

Are you some sort of...furry?

yeag

Why do you reblog so much?

Brother I LOVE posting. that's just how it is.

Fav music artists?

It changes literally ALL the time but I will recommend ANYTHING by Vylet Pony, its music is incredible and probably the reason I'm a weird niche microcelebrity now.

Why are you like this?

theater kid + having a lot of fun on the internet makes you a bit silly hehe hoo

SUSAN TAXPAYER QUESTIONS

Is it out? Not yet! But hopefully sometime in the next year. I dunno! I take things at my own pace and keep stuff fun. :)

What are you using to make it? SMBX2! It's a free fangame engine for Mario episodes, but it's incredibly versatile and has a wonderful community, so I decided to make Susan Taxpayer in it.

Is there a demo? You betcha! You can find it right here. I'll also probably put it up on my itch.io.

How do I install it? I made a post here about how to run the SAGE '23 demo!

[autisticandroids]

i've been seeing ai takes that i actually agree with and have been saying for months get notes so i want to throw my hat into the ring.

so i think there are two main distinct problems with "ai," which exist kind of in opposition to each other. the first happens when ai is good at what it's supposed to do, and the second happens when it's bad at it.

the first is well-exemplified by ai visual art. now, there are a lot of arguments about the quality of ai visual art, about how it's soulless, or cliche, or whatever, and to those i say: do you think ai art is going to be replacing monet and picasso? do you think those pieces are going in museums? no. they are going to be replacing soulless dreck like corporate logos, the sprites for low-rent edugames, and book covers with that stupid cartoon art style made in canva. the kind of art that everyone thinks of as soulless and worthless anyway. the kind of art that keeps people with art degrees actually employed.

this is a problem of automation. while ai art certainly has its flaws and failings, the main issue with it is that it's good enough to replace crap art that no one does by choice. which is a problem of capitalism. in a society where people don't have to sell their labor to survive, machines performing labor more efficiently so humans don't have to is a boon! this is i think more obviously true for, like, manufacturing than for art - nobody wants to be the guy putting eyelets in shoes all day, and everybody needs shoes, whereas a lot of people want to draw their whole lives, and nobody needs visual art (not the way they need shoes) - but i think that it's still true that in a perfect world, ai art would be a net boon, because giving people without the skill to actually draw the ability to visualize the things they see inside their head is... good? wider access to beauty and the ability to create it is good? it's not necessary, it's not vital, but it is cool. the issue is that we live in a society where that also takes food out of people's mouths.

but the second problem is the much scarier one, imo, and it's what happens when ai is bad. in the current discourse, that's exemplified by chatgpt and other large language models. as much hand-wringing as there has been about chatgpt replacing writers, it's much worse at imitating human-written text than, say, midjourney is at imitating human-made art. it can imitate style well, which means that it can successfully replace text that has no meaningful semantic content - cover letters, online ads, clickbait articles, the kind of stuff that says nothing and exists to exist. but because it can't evaluate what's true, or even keep straight what it said thirty seconds ago, it can't meaningfully replace a human writer. it will honestly probably never be able to unless they change how they train it, because the way LLMs work is so antithetical to how language and writing actually works.

the issue is that people think it can. which means they use it to do stuff it's not equipped for. at best, what you end up with is a lot of very poorly written children's books selling on amazon for $3. this is a shitty scam, but is mostly harmless. the behind the bastards episode on this has a pretty solid description of what that looks like right now, although they also do a lot of pretty pointless fearmongering about the death of art and the death of media literacy and saving the children. (incidentally, the "comics" described demonstrate the ways in which ai art has the same weaknesses as ai text - both are incapable of consistency or narrative. it's just that visual art doesn't necessarily need those things to be useful as art, and text (often) does). like, overall, the existence of these kids book scams are bad? but they're a gnat bite.

to find the worst case scenario of LLM misuse, you don't even have to leave the amazon kindle section. you don't even have to stop looking at scam books. all you have to do is change from looking at kids books to foraging guides. i'm not exaggerating when i say that in terms of texts whose factuality has direct consequences, foraging guides are up there with building safety regulations. if a foraging guide has incorrect information in it, people who use that foraging guide will die. that's all there is to it. there is no antidote to amanita phalloides poisoning, only supportive care, and even if you survive, you will need a liver transplant.

the problem here is that sometimes it's important for text to be factually accurate. openart isn't marketed as photographic software, and even though people do use it to lie, they have also been using photoshop to do that for decades, and before that it was scissors and paintbrushes. chatgpt and its ilk are sometimes marketed as fact-finding software, search engine assistants and writing assistants. and this is dangerous. because while people have been lying intentionally for decades, the level of misinformation potentially provided by chatgpt is unprecedented. and then there are people like the foraging book scammers who aren't lying on purpose, but rather not caring about the truth content of their output. obviously this happens in real life - the kids book scam i mentioned earlier is just an update of a non-ai scam involving ghostwriters - but it's much easier to pull off, and unlike lying for personal gain, which will always happen no matter how difficult it is, lying out of laziness is motivated by, well, the ease of the lie.* if it takes fifteen minutes and a chatgpt account to pump out fake foraging books for a quick buck, people will do it.

*also part of this is how easy it is to make things look like high effort professional content - people who are lying out of laziness often do it in ways that are obviously identifiable, and LLMs might make it easier to pass basic professionalism scans.

and honestly i don't think LLMs are the biggest problem that machine learning/ai creates here. while the ai foraging books are, well, really, really bad, most of the problem content generated by chatgpt is more on the level of scam children's books. the entire time that the internet has been shitting itself about ai art and LLM's i've been pulling my hair out about the kinds of priorities people have, because corporations have been using ai to sort the resumes of job applicants for years, and it turns out the ai is racist. there are all sorts of ways machine learning algorithms have been integrated into daily life over the past decade: predictive policing, self-driving cars, and even the youtube algorithm. and all of these are much more dangerous (in most cases) than chatgpt. it makes me insane that just because ai art and LLMs happen to touch on things that most internet users are familiar with the working of, people are freaking out about it because it's the death of art or whatever, when they should have been freaking out about the robot telling the cops to kick people's faces in.

(not to mention the environmental impact of all this crap.)

[reccord-raccoon]

don't know if anyone agrees with me, but I kind of fucking hate natlan?? don't get me wrong it looks awesome, like the vibes are sick as fuck but like visually it doesn't fit the rest of teyvat at all.

more ranting below

they have dinosaurs and cars and floating dj turntables, the characters are wearing hightops and visor hats. meanwhile, monstadt is powered by windmills, and everyone is wearing coats and corsets.

like yeah it's a fantasy game, they're allowed to warp elements of the time period they've based it off of, but it feels like they just don't give a fuck about sticking to one time period at all anymore. where did the art direction go??

even just looking at the artwork fucks with my head. if you switch between kazuha's and mualani's banners, the stark difference in the art styles is clear as day. it feels like mualani is from a completely different game. maybe I would actually like natlan if it WERE in a completely different game

I do still like genshin, but this has really broken my suspension of disbelief, and I'm not sure I'll ever be as into it as I used to be

just had to get that off my chest somewhere, does anyone agree?

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: SNOW POKEY

Debut: Super Mario 3D World

Usually we do not write the name of the character in all capitals in the beginning of the post. But I am just so excited about Snow Pokey! A few days ago, the little creature in my brain knocked on the door and said, “Hey! Snow Pokey?” And yeah! I have never agreed with something so much!

Snow Pokey is a perfect design! Literally nothing could make this better. Maybe black dot buttons on the body segments would be cute, but the mouth is already a black dot, so it would make things a little weird! So, Snokey is a snowman Pokey, of course, a concept that lends itself to the body plan BETTER than the original. Big snowballs are made to be stacked! Its body segments have ice spikes, which is perfect, so perfect that it baffles me when those spikes are depicted as just snow. That would not be painful! I have not personally been stabbed by snow, but I do not believe it would be painful or possible. I sincerely apologize if it has ever happened to you.

Enough rambling about that though! It is time for the best part, Snow Pokey’s darling head and face! It has the cool white-pupiled eyes of regular Pokeys, but instead of their smile, a cute surprised expression, and of course, a carrot nose! The cherry on top of the cutie pie a la mode is the bucket it wears as an off-center hat! The go-to hat for Japanese snowmen, rather than a top hat. It is not only more casual, but more implies it is not exactly a natural creature, but one intentionally created! Who created it? I don’t know, but I will kiss them on the mouth.

Since it is alive, I can only assume there is some Magic involved here. Maybe the bucket granted it life, maybe a wizard did, maybe a Christmas miracle did! Maybe it was a wish made by the carrot, its one organic component. Being made of snow, these can’t be BIOLOGICALLY related to standard Pokeys, but maybe this is snow being inhabited by the soul of a Pokey! A Pokey who always wanted a nose, and is constantly in awe at all the scents the world has to offer!

Snocchi replaces Pokeys in the snow themes of Super Mario Maker 2, and that means we get to see it in three new styles, for which they made entirely new designs! What a treat! In Super Mario Bros., they wear yellow hard hats, perhaps for protection during a snowball fight, and have a big, cheeky smile! In Super Mario Bros. 3, they now have a red knit cap, which seems counterintuitive for a snow creature, like a sun wearing sunglasses, but it is really all about style. This one has a simple little smile, it’s just happy! Finally, in Super Mario World, Snow Pokey is VERY happy, no doubt because of its new hat! This one has a pompom! I like to think this is the same one from SMB3, but someone very kindly enhanced it. Snow Pokey wanted a pompom hat, but it did love its plain knit hat dearly, and now it gets to have both!

Snow Pokey appears in the art for December 2017′s LINE calendar, and what a cozy scene this is! Oh, to be so cozy in a warm snow house with some funny friends both inside and outside! Even if it wants to stay cold and you want to stay warm, you are never too far from each other! Also, this one is so small. Baby!

Finally, good news! There is a toy of Snow Pokey! It is real in our world! It is physically among us! I love Snow Pokey so dearly!

[emmabirb8]

My condolences to everyone who's been suffering after the announcement that s6 would be the end for Shadows, but tbh, personally, I'm kinda relieved.

Don't get me wrong; I really do love the show. But man, ever since the s3 finale, they've been continually missing the mark, and it has gotten so tiring. Each episode nowadays feels like it's hit or miss, and whatever character arcs they've decided on are not only complicated and ill-fitting, but they're nonsensical based on previous characterization. Guillermo is definitely the most egregious example. I've been wondering lately if maybe Harvey has been less involved with his input into the character more recently because MAN, since the start of s4, he's felt nothing but off.

And honestly, with a show as good as Shadows used to be at its peak, it would only get more and more uncomfortable the more seasons they added seeing how royally they've fucked everything up already. I'm glad to know that at the very least, things can't get worse to a point where I'd become so frustrated I'd stop watching entirely. (That has happened with shows in the past for me, and it is NOT fun.)

I'm sad for the cast because I know they all had a BLAST on set, and it's unfortunate to see such a diverse, progressive, LGBTQIA+ representative series be thrown out so soon, but... I do really feel that this is ultimately for the best.

And hey, there's ALWAYS hype for fan content! The ideas, plot lines, and styles presented in fan art and fics and all other types of fanworks are SO enthralling and, tbh, have been more interesting than what the writers have churned out in canon for a while. I absolutely eat that shit UP. It's all just so *chef's kiss* delicious.

So really, it's never truly over, friends! I imagine this fandom in particular is gonna stick around for pretty much forever, lol.

(Keep in mind this is all my personal thoughts and opinions. I don't expect anyone to agree with me, but hey, if you're wearing the same hat, that's cool. I just wanted to dump my reaction somewhere, lol.)

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.46 Flames

I didn't bother doing a second class because I had a business matter I wanted to explore. The management team at the rec center would always have my gratitude for allowing me to host my classes, but as I said previously, it wasn't a sustainable solution. It rained too much in the autumn, and soon winter would be upon us. I needed an indoor solution, so I went downtown to Anchorpoint Wharf to see if I could find an unconventional space to rent, since I couldn't afford an entire building yet. If there was a backroom, basement, or attic I could use, or even an unfinished space, I could make it work.

I began my reconnaissance at the library. If it didn't say "library" on the sign, I wouldn't have known it was one when I walked in. The atrium was more like a mini art gallery, displaying works from local artists, I assumed. The rest of the downstairs was more like a community center with a breakroom outfitted with amenities for infants and a kids' play area. Upstairs looked more library-like, but unfortunately, it didn't have any obvious spaces I could rent.

I got hungry, so I found a street cart and had lunch. San Sequoia was definitely no sleepy town with its bold colors surging life into everything. Most of the colors didn't even match, but it worked so well, especially with the bridge towering over the city, tying it all together with its rusty hue. I loved how you could see it literally everywhere you went. San Sequoia had definitely become my favorite place I'd lived.

After lunch, I walked around the area, continuing my search for spaces. I stumbled upon an old movie theater and decided to take a break and see what they had going on. The movie was so boring, I couldn't even tell you what it was about. I was just so mad I wasted good money on that. Luckily, Yasmine called just as it was ending, so I ran out of the theater to answer.

She said she wanted to clarify our conversation from the other day. She liked me a lot and hoped her proposition didn't change how I felt about her. Then she asked me out! It was kind of thrilling to be on the other end of a date. I definitely needed some fun after that movie attempted to suck the life out of me, so I agreed to meet her at the pier in Copperdale.

I went home to shower and put an outfit together. It was only the pier, so I didn't make too much of an effort. Good thing too because it was so cold there. I had on my coat the whole time; I hated wasting good outfits.

I found Yasmine by the photo booth, and her outfit was definitely something to note. I never put much thought into my outerwear before, but the way she put her coat, hat, and jeans together had me second guessing my style choices.

"You look nice," I said.

"Thanks. Wanna take a pic with me?"

Me and Yasmine squeezed together in a tiny booth... I braced myself for whatever she planned to do to me in there because, if there was one thing I knew about her, it was she was bold and always went after what she wanted, and she definitely wanted me. She took full advantage of the lack of space and hugged up on me for our picture. We stepped out and waited for the picture to print, and just as I suspected, we looked like a very happy couple.

"Awww! We are so cute," she shouted. "I'm keeping this one."

I guess she should have a keepsake of our time together because that was the closest she was going to a relationship with me. Don't get me wrong. I enjoyed spending time with her and was totally down for some casual, unattached adult fun. But that's all it could be.

"I hope you're not scared of heights," she said.

Yasmine and Luca trapped in a slow-moving hanging basket... The story wrote itself, and I fully expected her to suck my face off, but she behaved.

"Look," she yelled. "There's my house."

I looked at whatever dark blob of trees she pointed at, but saw nothing resembling a residence. Copperdale looked like a black forest from up high at night. I bet the view was spectacular in the daytime, though.

We got off the ride, and she checked in with me.

"Are you having fun?"

"Yeah, thanks. I didn't ride anything when we were here last, so I'm glad I got the chance."

"Come on!"

She grabbed my hand and pulled me toward our next destination. Her excitement about the rides was just like a child's; it was adorable.

"This is one of my favorite ones."

It had a scary, Spooky Day theme, and I wondered what we were about to get ourselves into, not that I was scared or anything. On the other side of the door was the line. When we finally made it to the ride, it was kind of like a mine cart we sat in. It took us around this haunted house while animatronics and actors in costume jumped out at us, attempting their best scare tactics. It was cute; I guess.

The next ride was similar except it was love themed, and we rode around in a boat. Every time I looked in her direction, she was looking at me with a twinkle in her eye. It seemed they made the ride for moments like that, and with the number of teenagers who frequented it, I probably was one of many who'd experienced their first kiss in there. But I didn't want to make any assumptions, despite knowing what she wanted from me. I scooted closer, letting her know I was into whatever she had in mind. Instead, she playfully smacked me on the shoulder and laughed. I didn't like that one bit.

She was still laughing when we got off the ride, but I was not.

"Come on, I was just kidding, Luca!"

I was a very confident sim, except when it came to romance. A joke like that could sever all shreds of confidence I thought I had. There was no way she could have known that, but still.

She stepped to me within whisper distance, and my entire body felt like it was engulfed in flames. Here it comes!

"I've been wanting to do this for a long time," she said, yanking me into a deep, hungry kiss.

At first, I couldn't believe it was finally happening despite anticipating it all night. Once the shock of her lips colliding with mine wore off, I kissed her back just as hungrily. Every thought and dream that haunted me over the last few weeks fueled my hunger, and I could not get enough of her. I hoped this wasn't another cruel joke because my pants were getting too tight and I needed to go all the way.

"Come back to my place," she whispered.

I hoped she didn't live far. This was definitely not how I imagined my day ending, but I was totally down for the detour.

Need to catch up? See what you missed or start reading here!

[avalentina]

Harry Styles and The Most Difficult Time of the Year!

It's here! The first one-shot for my Holiday Spectacular.

“Lovie, we’ve been at this for hours, are you done yet?” H asked me. H as in Harry Styles, my boyfriend, who is being a very good sport while helping me with my Christmas Shopping.

“I’d be closer to being done if you would actually tell me what you want for Christmas H.” I reply in a slightly snarky manner as ive been attempting to get my answer to this question out of him since September.

“All I want for Christmas is You, baby.” H said back.

“Mariah Carey? Seriously H?” I say before turning into a kitchenware stall at the Christmas Market, and selecting a bells with holly cookie cutter for my mother. I’ve been giving her one every year since I was 6 and she let me help her make the sugar cookies. “Now I just need something for your mum,” I say after tucking the cookie cutter into the bag with the gifts for my dad, sister, and brother.

“I already have our gift for my mum.” H says to me, and quite matter of factly at that. “Now come on, let's get some cocoa to go, I wanna wrap you up, tie you in a bow, and put you under the Christmas tree for me.” You both laugh at that.

A few hours later, you've finally returned from the market and are getting your big wrapping station set up in your art room. It's huge. Big enough for quite literally every medium of art you do. Harry was happy to adjust his renovation plans when you agreed to move in with him just shy of a year ago. There are only two things in this lower level, your art room, and Harry's Studio. The music softly making its way through the sound panels for the instruments and that first croon Harry does. Though lately, Harry has been having the sound proofing on so nothing goes beyond his studio walls. And whenever you ask him about it his answer is the exact same, “You'll hear it one day Lovie, it is for you after all. Not until that one day though, there will be no spoilers.” That last line is your favorite because he glares at his mates, Mitch and Kid especially since he knows you're pretty close with them.

Now as Harry is chilling in the lounge chair in your art room singing acoustic Christmas songs while you wrap gifts, you stop every so often and turn to him.

“H, I need the present for your mum so I can wrap it.” You say and he just smiles at you before getting himself back into the song.

Finally after hours of wrapping, Anne's gift is the only one left and you still don't have it.

“Harold Edward Styles, I need the gift for your mum, NOW!” You give him your best death glare, hoping it will scare him at least a little bit, after all, you're no fun when you're mad.

He runs over to the studio and comes back with a little black wooden ring box with Le Raoulivere engraved into it. He sets it in your hands and you open it automatically.

“It's empty H.”

“Mum's old one for the ring from Robin broke, so we're getting her a very, very nice new one.” H says and I go to wrap it in the blue snowflake paper I have when h interrupts again. “Can you use the sleeping puppies wearing Santa hats one instead please love?” He asks very politely and you just sigh before wrapping it up in the paper Harry wanted.

“Thank you my love!” He says with a kiss when the bin is all packed up with the presents.

*****

December 24th

We're all dressed up. Harry has on his suit he hugged Stanley Tucci in at the Brits. You're in a midi silver dress with white Mary Janes and a small white clutch. The house is decorated, the presents are under the tree, the appetizers are in the ovens, and the doorbell is ringing. Plenty of time to calm down and not freak out. Shit wait, that's the doorbell.

“They're here H.” You holler and run over to let everyone in. “Merry Christmas Eve!”

Your family and H’s family are both here. Your mum, Dad, sister, and brother, Anne, Desmond, Gemma and Michal, Mike and Amy were invited, but had other plans. Everyone mingled with appetizers while you and Harry prepped the lasagnas. When they were done you all sat around the table smiling and laughing with each other. After dinner you turned on the fireplace and some soft tunes while doing gifts. When Anne unwrapped the one from you and Harry, she just smiled at you. It was a bit confusing at first, until the music switched. Harry was suddenly more anxious, and everyone else was just watching the two of you.

“What's going on?” You whispered to Harry. He smiled, pulled you over to stand in front of the Christmas tree with him, and said, “Y/N.”

You instinctively replied, “Yes H?”

“Y/N, it's the title of this song.” He answered back and let the lyrics wash over you both. You realized they were telling the story of the two of you, from colliding in a rainstorm, to you having almost no clue who he was, the time you spent apart, and him showing up at your doorstep soaking wet from rain ready to do whatever it took to get you back, and finally his little dreams for the life ahead of you two. The last line of the song was, “All you have to do is say yes to me.”

He knelt before you, took the box from Anne, and pulled the ring out of his pocket. “Mum's been on my case lately, she knew I wanted to marry you before I did. So our real gift to her, only if you want it too, is us, because all I want for Christmas is you to agree to be my wife. I love you Y/N.”

“I love you too H. And yes, yes I want to be your wife!” You let out between tears.

After sliding the ring onto your finger, H kisses you and whispers, “best Christmas ever.”

“I made you a new pendant.” You whispered back.

“I'll love it, but even more so because it's from you.”

@freedomfireflies

Let me know if you want to be added to this taglist!

[hamcakevaletguy]

RPF Angela headcanons/scenarios with a pinch of angst because I’m procrastinating on my actual fics

(Feel free to use any of these as prompts)

(Also, sorry in advance for over explaining)

Platonic/General

Angela found out her love language is being known and being roasted for things that are unique to her (Tiny Car mukbang). She loves when people make fun of her and actively tries to make it easy for everyone to recognize her (ex: continuing to give Anthony chances to guess her on his “guess who slapped me” even after he felt her cast and didn’t know it was her, most of her top threes in Shayne guesses having joke answers to make it obvious that it’s her) because she’s not confident that any of them actually know her enough

Angela gets annoyed at how unoriginal some comments can be (in Pit Theater videos only referring to her voice or verbal typos that she makes because of her natural lack of filter/dyslexia) but still making jokes in the same strain because she knows everyone will laugh at it (ex: making typos on purpose in Patently Stupid, but also sometimes doing it on accident because she’s dyslexic) putting other people’s enjoyment over her own discomfort

Angela always laughs/apologizes after she “insults” anyone no matter how obvious it is that it’s a joke because she doesn’t want to be thought of as mean. She also spirals/immediately takes it back when she thinks she hurt someone (ex: Ian’s style in the Hot Ones: Truth or Dab video & telling Shayne he dances like a towel in the Black Beopardy stream)

Angela immediately refusing to “yes, and” bits about her not liking her coworkers (ex: staring contest stream, Shayne “she doesn’t laugh at my jokes” “omg, no! that’s so sad” & April fools smoshcast “it’s not funny to joke about” when Chanse says Amanda doesn’t like Angela) because even the idea of it makes her sick

Angela doesn’t want to just be herself on camera sometimes (her episode of Perfect Person Podcast) because it’s fine if people don’t like her characters, she can change those at the drop of a hat, but if people don’t like her as a person…

Angela’s busy all the time working on Smosh, Starkid, several sketch/improv teams, producing and starring in short films, making time to still see her friends, and has almost no time for self care. She’s constantly loading herself with caffeine to stay up because people need her (she’s a people pleaser, she can’t help it). One particularly busy month, she gets more and more tired as the days go on and no one notices until she passes out mid shoot

Romantic

(Anyone) Angela falls in love with one of her close friends/co-workers, but decides not to pursue it/speak about it at all because she wants to keep their friendship above all else (from the infamous Agree to Disagree video: friendship breakups are hard for her; she’d rather have them stay in her life as a friend than risk losing them for a chance at something more)

(Anyone) Angela’s not good at recognizing when someone’s flirting with her. She’s also not aware of when she’s flirting most times (she says a lot of things before her brain can process and fully catch up) She’s the type to not realize her feelings before it’s too late and the other person has already moved on

Sub-headcanon: At some point, most people she’s come in contact with (that’s attracted to women) have had a tiny crush on her. Her winning prom queen in high school (1, 2 Switch) wasn’t just because she was the one who organized prom; it’s because 90% of the student body was in love with her. (She was in a performing arts middle school and high school. Most of them were probably bi theater kids. You’re telling me that the most popular kid at that school wouldn’t be Angela? The same Angela who was part of the student council, is an incredible performer, very friendly and enthusiastic about everything, and attractive to boot?)

[possibilistfanfiction]

Hi, hello, I’m the original avatrice footy anon, and I’m just…absolutely besotted with what you’ve already given us. Ava as an enthusiastic goal scoring terror who can’t track back to save her life is perfect. Captain Beatrice, the world’s best and most dedicated footballer who also immediately agrees to have pizza (at her own house!!!) with her new teammate is also perfect. Thank you with the whole of my football loving, recovering half Catholic, one-of-my-favorite-sounds-is-when-a-boot-hits-a-ball-just-right heart.

[a tiny bit more for u as i chug along!]

/

you storm into coach superion’s office, your chest simmering with anger. it’s not the first time this has happened, and you know, unfortunately, that there’s no way it’ll be the last, but this club has treated you pretty well since you joined it. 

‘hello, beatrice.’ she puts down her ipad. ‘sit?’

you keep pacing, too upset to stay still, which is why you started playing football and doing martial arts in the first place when you were a child. 

coach superion just leans back in her chair and waves a hand.

‘have you seen the club’s latest instagram post?’

she lifts a brow.

‘okay, fine.’ you unlock your phone and step up to the desk, hand it to her.

she looks for a few seconds and then scoots it back to you. ‘what’s the problem?’

‘we won the last game, as a team, and so did the men’s side, and they posted ava and michael salvius together.’ not together together, really, just a funny photo of them during lunch, smiling over taco bowls in their training gear.

‘yes. they both scored in the last game though. ava, a hat trick even.’

‘i was there. i assisted two of those goals.’

‘i was quite happy with your performance, as always, beatrice.’

you don’t even know how to put into words the feeling in your body, like an open-handed punch to the wall, or getting stepped on with metal studs. 

‘beatrice,’ coach superion says, gentle, and you hate it. 

‘i just — i hate that ownership and social are so… enthusiastic about using conventionally attractive white players in our promo. and, come on, men’s and women’s promo together? you have to know what people will think.’

‘do you think that?’

you feel your cheeks flush, tamp down the ugly stinging in your hands at how hard ava had laughed at michael’s joke during physical therapy recovery yesterday, how they like to get dinner together sometimes. you know they’re friends, but — 'i'm not jealous.'

coach superion pauses and blinks a few times, then says, ‘i agree with you, about how our club should not only promote white players. and, as i always have, i can promise you that i will do everything in my power to make sure that doesn’t happen. you, and mary, and dora, and camila, are so important to our team and are at the heart of our success.’

you feel a little bolstered by the words; you have found a home here, and you trust coach superion — but you feel a different kind of upset and angry, one you don't think you really have the capacity or bravery to explain.

as always, coach superion seems to know that, though. ‘but, beatrice, beyond that,' she says, 'i think you have a little sorting out to do on your end.’

you fight back the very unprofessional instinct to just groan. ‘i’ll — i’ll see you tomorrow. thank you for your time.’

you can see coach superion fighting what you’re sure is a laugh at your expense, but you just stand straight and nod.

‘don’t forget, you have a presser with silva tomorrow before the match this weekend.’

great. ‘yes. thank you.’

‘have a good evening, beatrice.’

you leave before you demolish even more of your dignity.

/

the presser goes just about as you’d thought it would: ava is the furthest from media trained but charms the room relentlessly — she’s funny, and smart, and can answer questions in four languages fluently. you are media trained, and ava defers to you for some of the harder, more complex questions about tactics and style of play. things are going fine, and you think you’ll be able to make it out blessedly free of anything annoying, but then —

‘for ava,’ a reporter says, and ava nods. ‘you have a great friendship with michael salvius, it seems, one that’s very popular on social media. can you tell us a little bit about that?’

you’re about to jump in, because what the hell, but then ava frowns. 

‘michael is my friend, yes. he’s kind, and i enjoy spending time with him. we think of football in similar ways.’ it’s diplomatic and you’re pleasantly surprised. ‘but, if you’re insinuating that we might be more than friends because we eat lunch together sometimes and were in an instagram post, not only are you definitely wrong, but that’s just really fucking gross and weird.’

you should step in: you’re captain and a media veteran, but ava’s on a roll, and who are you to stop her, really?

‘beyond that, michael and i are both white players, and we’re both new to a club that is really diverse, on both the men’s and women’s sides. if you’re looking for a face of this team, and this club, and even football itself, you have beatrice right here.’

you take a sip of your gatorade immediately to hide the blush you feel all over your face. 

‘she’s the best player i have ever played with,’ ava says, and when she looks over at you and smiles you can’t help but smile back. ‘i enjoy spending time with her, and she’s kind. i think she thinks of football in a far purer way than me, but i have something to learn from that too.’

‘i believe, most fundamentally, in tracking back on defense,’ you find yourself saying, almost involuntarily, and ava rolls her eyes good-naturedly while the room laughs. 

‘i’m looking forward to continuing to make sure the women of color i play with have space and the accolades they rightfully deserve. i’m very honored to be on this team.’ ava smiles at you, like she really means it. ‘any other questions?’

/

‘thank you,’ you say, as you’re both walking back to the locker rooms. 

ava rolls her eyes. ‘idiot reporters. i don’t really care about the post, because michael is my friend, but, like, what the fuck.’

‘well, michael is easy on the eyes.’

it takes a second to snort a laugh. ‘what are you, like seventy?’ she elbows you playfully. ‘but anyway, i meant it. you are kind. i hope we’re, you know, friends?’

‘we are,’ you say, a little desperate feeling in your chest at the word. ‘yes.’

’sick,’ ava says. ‘also, there’s promo for pride month, right? soon?’

it’s late april, so — ‘it should be on the schedule for next week.’

‘cool,’ ava says. ‘well, i’d like the set the story gay and be in it at some point, if that’s okay.’

this isn’t exactly groundbreaking information to you, but you can’t hide the way your hands shake and you have to swallow. ‘you’re gay?’

‘no,’ ava says. ‘bi, queer, whatever. not particularly passionate about being cis. but my pun wouldn’t have landed quite as well.’

it takes a second for you to, like, be normal, but you end up laughing, a real laugh, far more relieved than you want it to sound. ‘thanks, for sharing.’

ava grins. ‘you gonna be in it with me?’

you never have before; every year, mary and shannon were leaders for pride month, and you happily orchestrated everything behind the scenes. you kneel for the anthem and always wear a rainbow armband and you never post anything personal on social media; you’ve never had a partner, so you’ve let people believe what they’ll believe so far.

‘i — i’m not sure,’ you say, will your voice to stay steady. ‘i’m not sure i’m… ready, to be out like that.’

‘that’s cool,’ ava says. ‘totally up to you, you know i support whatever you want. but, i’m just saying, we would make one hell of an instagram post. think of the comments on that.’

you feel a little lightheaded at the prospect of the world speculating you and ava silva are dating, but in a way that’s calm. ‘well, maybe.’

‘you’re beautiful and hot, bea. don’t forget it. and, like, so am i, so…’

you roll your eyes. ‘and humble, your most inspiring quality.’

‘hey,’ she says, ‘i scored a hat trick two days ago.’

‘i assisted you on two of those.’

‘exactly my point,’ she says. ‘we make a great team.’

she winks and you just shake your head, not bothering to fight the smile on your lips or the warmth in your chest.

[1bringthesun]

alright. we’ve reached deranged o’clock. today, i, tai, will be dissecting the garb of Fyodor (bsd). if someone has done this already, oops! let’s begin.

to start, an image of Fyodor for reference.

so i’m kicking us off with his hat, because that’s probably the easiest part. the fandom has collectively agreed that it’s an ushanka, and yeah, i tend to agree. it pretty much looks exactly like this (image pictured below: white ushanka from this link).

so that’s that. to balance it out, i’m doing his cape next, because what the fuck. it looks like a pretty normal cape at first glance. one with fur lining. like this (image pictured below: a black cape with fur lining at the top near the collar from this link.)

but i urge you to go look back at the reference image, because not only does Fyodor’s cape not attach at the top, not only does it have buttons along the edges, but it has a notch lapel (a type of collar lapel; basically those foldy things by the sides at the top of a trench coat). and once again, it doesn’t attach at the damn top.

so that leaves us two options: either it’s an unbuttoned coat with sleeves that don’t show because it’s so dark and a fur lining, or it’s a really weird cape. and please spare me, because i know nothing about fashion. i’m doing this all for fun. so let’s explore each option.

it could definitely be something like this, except with fur added (image pictured below: soviet officer’s naval uniform from this link)

except… you know. it doesn’t have sleeves. but his cape doesn’t have anywhere to clip onto at the top, and it also has that collar lapel, and also buttons, so it barely looks like a cape at all! what are you WEARING, Fyodor??

there’s one last possibility, but it’s not a style of cape so much as it is one specific thing i found that looks like the discolored version of what Fyodor is wearing. because i know i’m going to hit the image limit, i’m just going to tell you to visit this link if you wanna see what it looks like. it’s just a lora piana cape.

in any case, his cape does look like a personally tailored version of something that originally came from the russian military, so there’s some food for thought. moving onto his shirt.

the one clothing item that looks most like what he’s wearing is a qipao/cheongsam top. for all intents and purposes, the style and everything looks quite similar—the buttons and how they’re in the middle, where the purple-colored trim would go on Fyodor’s shirt and how it aligns with the sewing, etc. here is an example.

(image pictured below: a white qipao/cheongsam top that honestly looks a lot like what Fyodor is wearing from this link)

that looks pretty similar, right? right?!?! but damnit Fyodor, you had to make things complicated, didn’t you?! because … because your collar? that is NOT a qipao/cheongsam collar. (image pictured below: official art of Fyodor holding his hat and smiling with no cape on from this link)

the only thing that would explain how this was still a qipao/cheongsam top was if he was wearing a fengxian collar. and even then… it’s not quite right. (image pictured below: woman wearing a red dudou with a fengxian collar from this link.)

…but putting so much effort into styling one single shirt… i mean, i couldn’t find any men’s examples of the fengxian collar because styling your qipao is more of a feminine thing to do. so let’s visit russian fashion again.

ah, but there’s the slight kicker. 19th century russian fashion was, to my knowledge, influenced by asian fashion. for example, the khalat, also known as a russian cape, which— huh, do you think he could be wearing a khalat?

….i finished talking about his cape. and as i was writing about the weird collar on his shirt, i remembered this official art, which i grabbed and saved directly from the manga so i don’t have a link source. (image pictured below: newish official art released in the manga—Dazai and Fyodor standing next to each other with yellow paint(?) severing their heads from their bodies and TV screens with various pictures surrounding them.)

Fyodor’s collar! look, it’s straight! maybe he IS wearing a cheongsam! the cape still has that weird collar lapel (goddamn it) so i can’t really say anything enlightened about that, but… the shirt!!

cool! alright! his pants! so this is really straightforward. idk if it’s pants that come as a pair with the shirt or something, but they just look like normal white linen pants to me. (image pictured below: linen, white pants on a woman from this link)

finally, his shoes. i only have one image left before i hit the image limit, so i hope you’re willing to scroll back to the top, where you’ll see his shoes look very strange, but surprisingly, they’re easy enough to label.

i think it’s likely he’s wearing Renaissance boots, given how they look almost identical to his sans the fact they’re disconnected in the front, but Renaissance boots DO have gaps, it’s just not pictured in the specific image of these specific boots i chose. (image pictured below: Renaissance boots from this link.)

yeah, they’re a little short, and maybe they don’t look EXACTLY right, but you can’t deny it’s the same style. if you think the shoe quarters look a little less attached to the vamps, then i’d just tell you to consider the fact he’s wearing spatterdashes and call it a day. (more about spats here.)

and finally, if you’re interested in 19th century/historical russian fashion, given Fyodor’s outfit seems pretty inspired by that, i advise you check out this link, which goes into some detail about things i didn’t.

of course, i hope you enjoyed my disorganized insanity, and may you have a good sun-out time or moon-out time!

[moviemunchies]

I remember that as soon as I saw the trailer for this movie, I had a feeling it would be exactly the sort of movie I’d love to see. I love sibling stories, and I love when movies and television shows have scenes where just about anybody is ready to throw down at the drop of a hat no matter how ridiculous it seems (that’s one of the reasons I loved Scott Pilgrim).

I knew that I had to see this movie, basically.

Polite Society is a film about two Pakistani-English sisters in London, Lena and Ria. Lena, the elder sister, recently quit art school. Ria, the younger sister, is still in high school, and despite her parents and teachers thinking she’d have a good job as a doctor, she wants to be a stuntwoman, and Lena helps her make videos where she shows off her martial arts moves.

Things get rough when rather suddenly, Lena starts dating a new guy, Salim, and quickly gets engaged. Thinking that her sister is giving up her career as an artist to be a housewife, Ria decides that she’s got to break these two up and make Lena come to her senses. But then Ria discovers something sinister is actually going on, and so this is about more than resentment about her sister’s life choices.

Know this going into the movie: this isn’t realistic. It’s quite ridiculous, in fact. Characters who have no reason to know martial arts suddenly do, and the villain displays a noticeable lack of awareness of how non-beneficial the Evil Plan even is. That doesn’t change that it’s loads of fun, because the movie knows how ridiculous it is. The Khan vs. Khan fight proves that, with how over-the-top it is, and how little their parents seem to regard the damage it causes.

Something that surprised me with the movie was how the trailers for this movie spoiled the tidbit about there being something evil going on (and a couple of the scenes towards the end). The movie itself doesn’t make that clear until quite a ways into it–until then, you might think that Ria is only imagining that her sister is throwing away her life for something she doesn’t agree with, rather than there being a villain of the piece. Then again, with the random martial arts fights you might have given you a clue that this isn’t just a family drama.

I should say, talking about the martial arts scenes: they’re over-the-top, and not the “realistic” style of something like John Wick. Obvious wire-work abounds. That doesn’t change they’re fun, because they’re the kinds of fight scenes we all always wished we had in our own lives. Well, I always wished I had in my own life.

More directly, this is a story about two English Pakistani sisters. Their ethnicity is not incidental, but very often it feels as if when someone makes a movie or television show about ethnic minorities, they’re pure drama about their struggles and meant to make white people feel like they’ve learned something (YES I’m still resentful about the lack of Puerto Rican genre fiction in the mainstream). This movie doesn’t ignore their specific struggles–the story wouldn’t be the same if they weren’t part of the London Pakistani community, for instance. But it is nice to see that someone realized that a genre film about Pakistani girls that isn’t boring, angsty Oscar-bait.

That being said, I hope this movie wins awards and gets both popular and critical recognition. It’s a great, fun movie. I want you to see it. I want everyone to see it. Well, not everyone–there are some jokes and references that are not appropriate for younger audiences. But I want a lot of people to see a movie about a sister willing to beat the snot out of anyone who tries to stop her elder sister from living her dreams.

[castlebyersafterdark]

I don't understand the hate about this outfit like he looks goofy but he was cute in this!!!

omg it's my time to shine hahah i love talking costumes! firstly, mike's shirt is described as orange here by the costume designer so its not part of the blue and yellow theory really, sorry y'all! but we dont need that as byler evidence cos theyre clearly in love anyway. will was definitely judging his ensemble and my fav part is the way it says 'SURF' splashed across the back in huge pastel letters. it's an all-round cringe shirt for mike wheeler whose personality does NOT suit surfer boy style let alone fake, ill-fitting surfer boy knock off style haha. so really what the costume designers were doing is not trying to make mike look objectively bad in terms of out of context outfit, but rather its so awkward for his character and delivers the awkward vibes in as little time as possible in order to set the tone of the scene. so we can add into this...

the camera angle showing him cluelessly looking around for them

the way he's wearing sunglasses indoors, a feat only julian casablancas can pull off. mike wasnt on the concourse, he was never exposed to sunlight since he got on the plane in indianapolis and perhaps not even then lmao, no need for shades!

his goofy wave and squeaky, performative voice 'oh! oh hi will! fancy seeing you here!'

and the biggest culprit of all: THAT HAT

I mean, what is that hat? its the way its sat on his head making his hair look like a wig. major worzel gummidge vibes tbh. that hat cannot be worn with hair down, it should be with a high ponytail which makes me think is this even a man's hat? subtle costume design.

and lastly, the clothes are ill-fitting (just like his hellfire shirt which hangs off him and washes him out, making him look pallid and weary in episode 1). the orange washes him out, making his skin look extra pale (compare to the warmth of the van scene and how golden his skin looks there). the purple shirt does the same, and the vest is far too big for him. finn described the whole outfit, but mainly the flip flops as 'gross' lol, but its made worse by the sheer contrast of mike to will and el and everyone. he's so not cool here, in every way. perfect costume design storytelling!

so yeah, these details are subjective really, but then again you could say all of art is subjective. they try to create a mood and make you feel certain things when watching, and some people just won't get it. thats not a bad thing, but i think recognising when your taste butts heads with the artistic intention is very interesting! i always found mike to be a babe but i cringed so hard when he rocked up in this ensemble lmao. and i think the duffers wanted me to! compare it to how much his brown hair and pale skin suits the forest greens of season 1 and 2. mike is an autumnal colour complexion, not spring/summer pastels :)

THANK YOU for this! I love costume and wardrobes but I don't really feel like my knowledge base is adequate to deep dive beyond surface level vibes and this was a cool read.

Also yes! to the minimizing 'color theory' a little - it's a nice element for these two but I think too much stock is placed in what's a minor detail when so much more is important about these characters. And agree, Will was totally judging - even if he's into Mike, it's so clear that he's doing something out of character and awkward and trying to put on a different image for his girlfriend. I don't necessarily think the outfit is ugly - simply not Mike. That's what I'm saying but oh man, so right on every point. It's a very good storytelling tool. Yes, it's ill-fitting and the coloring makes him look off, like everything about how he's presenting himself is wrong. Overcompensation. Desaturation. I find the mistaken effort endearing, which I think is the point as well. The cringe along with the oh, Mike. He tried so hard and it turned out so wrong. You feel for him!!

(Hides though 🫣 as I'd absolutely wear the hat, I love an ugly hat. Then again - I go out of my way to wear ugly fashion on purpose sometimes because it's fun and amuses me, but that's a pointed choice haha. Mike probably thought it all was cool. I am not trying to be cool ever.)

He is an autumn boy! Fall colors and fall in general! Loved your take, very good insights. Agree agree, there's a lot of meaningful layers here and reasons for what we saw in that scene.

[alistairs-raven]

Cad Bane - Dark Woods Part 2

Part 2 // previous

Also on AO3

Western!AU Cad Bane and F!Reader (only because I like when Bane says Lil’ Lady too much)

@xinambercladx​​ requested a sequel to my oneshot for more context, and after some thought I agreed there is more story to tell. So therefore my original concept is altered, but the story is consistent.

Amazing art by my friend @stormytitan​​

—-

Warm and cozy, a young woman sat alone in her home. Outside the evening sun poured light through the green leaves of the forest. She waited for no one, because she lived alone, secluded and hidden in the woods outside of town, so she was alerted to the sound of approaching hooves breaking the peace. Although rare, she would occasionally get a visit from the sheriff, or possibly a lost traveler. She always welcomed both, and so when whoever was outside knocked on the door she didn’t hesitate to answer. 

“Hello! How can I help–” Her friendly smile vanished as she looked up into the blood red eyes of her guest. Gasping, she quickly tried to close the door but the man’s hand came up and kept it open as he forced his way inside. He was tall and intimidating, with sapphire skin and scars covering his scowling face. The woman didn’t need to know him to know he was dangerous, but he was infamous around these parts. She recognized the notorious outlaw.

Cad Bane closed the door behind him, trapping her inside. The woman felt herself shake. What did he want with her? She had never met him before and had nothing he would want. The man tipped his hat politely before he spoke. “Are ya alone, Lil’ Lady?” Should she lie and tell him there was someone on their way? Surely he would see right through her deceit. 

“There’s no one. “ She answered honestly. He accepted that answer and gestured towards the chair she’d been sitting at. She obeyed and sat back down, terrified of what he might do to her. But he turned his back to her and peered out the window, moving his head back and forth like he was looking for something. Was someone else coming? “Sir, what are you looking for? Maybe I can help?”

“Does de sheriff know his way up ‘ere?” Bane asked.

“Yes, he visits me sometimes.” The woman could see this displeased Bane as he bared his fangs at the window and reached up to touch the brim of his hat. A few minutes of silence passed between them before they saw rising dust and heard the sound of many approaching hooves. The woman felt relief as the sheriff and a posse approached the house, weapons drawn.  Cad Bane moved away from the window and quickly stalked over to her, gripping her by the wrist and roughly pulling her along with him. 

“I have de Lil’ Lady dat lives ‘ere.” Bane shouted through the closed door. “If ya don’t want her blood on yer hands you’ll holster yer weapons.” 

They wouldn’t do that. Sheriff Vanth had wanted Cad Bane brought in for so long, he wasn’t about to stop now. He’d let her die before he let the outlaw escape again. She teared up, fearing what would come next as Bane waited for his response. 

“This isn’t your style, Mr. Bane. Just let the girl go and we’ll settle this like men.” The sheriff shouted. When there was no response from inside the house, he was forced to change tactics. “Fine, we’ll do it your way. Come on out.” 

Bane brought the woman in front of him and held her tightly against his chest with one long arm. With the other he drew one of his dual revolvers and held it to her head. Opening the door a crack, he made sure the men had indeed holstered their weapons. “Yer gonna take yer boys back into town. S’long as I ain’t pursued, I’ll let de lady go tomorrow mornin’.”

Finding himself with little choice, Sheriff Vanth nodded in understanding. “Fine, but she better be unharmed. Anything happens to her, there’ll be hell to pay.” With that he turned his horse and  quickly led his men away. Bane watched from the doorway, and as soon as he felt they were far enough away he withdrew his weapon back to its holster and released the woman. 

She was in disbelief. The sheriff had actually complied… and left her alone with the most dangerous man around. 

“Ya see why yer town’s such an easy target, Lil’ Lady? Yer Sheriff is a weak fool dat can’t take down a lone man, even with a small army.”

“Sheriff Vanth is a good man!” The woman defended him as Bane pushed her forward out the door. The man put his fingers to his mouth and whistled loudly. She saw movement from the trees as a horse emerged from its hiding spot and came to them. The animal was dangerous looking enough, with it’s thin frame and blood red eyes, but the woman knew this horse. Rana was her name, and it had been said there was no horse faster. People also said she was an unfriendly beast that only liked Cad Bane. 

“Comeon.” Bane took her by the arm and led her toward the horse. “Get on.” When the woman tried to comply, the animal pulled away, nostrils flared and neck arched aggressively. “Easy, girl.” Bane’s voice went from harsh to calming as he spoke to his horse. He gripped her bridle and brought her attention to him, stroking the side of her face with his long fingers. “Shhh, yer alright.” Rana quickly settled, her desire to please him overriding her fear of other people.

The woman had been so distracted by how gentle this cold man could be that she’d forgotten what he’d instructed her to do until he turned his red gaze back to her. The horse was very tall, and she struggled but was eventually able to climb up. Bane came around and expertly pulled himself up, sitting directly behind the woman who now felt awkward with how close they were. He was pressed tightly against her, and she was even more trapped as he reached around with long duros arms to take hold of the reins. The position was strange, but the man likely didn’t want his prisoner behind him where he had less control. To her surprise, Bane turned the horse towards the trail where the sheriff had gone.

“We’re heading back to town? Why?” She asked, wanting to understand his plan now that she was part of it. She smelled the smoke and alcohol on his breath as he spoke behind her in that calm voice.

“I ain’t leavin’ til I get what I want. De sheriff expects us t’be headin’ in de opposite direction. Towards dat wild country I always lose him in. Soon as he was outta sight, he headed dere t’cut us off. I’m sure of it.” He explained. It made sense. Sheriff Vanth had let the outlaw go a little too easily. This way, he’d save her and bring in the infamous Cad Bane. Or so he thought, because really he’d left the town defenseless.

The sun was setting now, and Bane pushed his horse to go faster. He put his fingers to his mouth and whistled again, confusing the woman. Had he not been whistling for his horse earlier? Was he calling for someone else? Before she could ask, a shrill howl sounded in response. It was distant, and had come from behind them. Whatever had made it wasn’t human. The man seemed un-bothered and was silent until they cleared the trees and could see the towns’ lights up ahead. Pulling them to a stop, Bane reached up and cupped his hand under the woman’s chin, forcing her head back as he lowered his chapped lips to her ear.

“Listen now, Lil’ Lady. Yer mine til mornin’. Ya do as I say, don’t try t’escape, and come dawn I’ll release ya unharmed. Understand?”

By now the woman’s fear of the man was waning. Despite his threats, he hadn’t harmed her. She had expected to die the moment he showed up at her house, but now here she was - on his horse about to participate in his scheme. Feeling bold, she made a condition of her own. “I’ll do as you say, Mister. But when this is over, you will promise to leave me be. And never come by my home again.”  

Cad Bane was a lawless man, but he wasn’t without his own code. In this world, you didn’t give something for nothing. Contracts went both ways. Releasing his hold on her, he accepted her condition. “It’s a deal, Lil’ Lady.”

This should have made the woman feel better, but the binding of their deal felt so eerily final. She was silent as they continued into town. Rana’s eyes glowed bright red in the darkness, and the few people in the street fled at the sight of them, not wanting any trouble. Bane stopped in front of a nice looking house. The woman recognized it as the home of the local shopkeeper, a social man who had plenty of wealth. Of course this would be Bane’s target. The outlaw dismounted and the woman didn’t have much choice in the matter as Rana immediately bucked her off. Bane, perhaps feeling a bit guilty, helped her up. She wiped dirt off her face and she looked down to see more mud and dirt covering her clothes. She expected Bane to make some snide remark, but he surprised her again by moving ahead with her instructions.

“Get him t’come out. Don’t care how, I just need him clear of de house.” Bane’s voice was calm even though he was about to commit a crime. The woman had little choice, although she was grateful he hadn’t asked her to rob or kill someone. As she approached the house, an idea formed. She knocked on the door rapidly, causing the man inside to hurry to the door. 

“Yes, Ma’am, are you alright?!” The shopkeeper recognized the woman, although she was never in town this late. She looked like a literal mess, and was clearly distressed. 

“I need help! Please!” She gestured in the direction opposite Bane, drawing the man’s attention away. “I was helping someone and there was an accident. Please!” The shopkeeper didn’t have time to question any of this, and left the house to follow her lead, only to be stopped on the street by a familiar voice. 

“Thought ya could get outta it, did ya?” Bane approached from the shadows where he’d been hiding. “Callin’ de sheriff on me, now dat was low even fer you.”

“B-Bane!” The man stuttered in surprise. The woman pulled away from him and he realized he’d been set up. “You! You’re with him?!” 

As the woman shook her head no, Bane nodded yes. “De Lil’ Lady’s with me tonight, but don’t’chya worry ‘bout dat. I’m here fer what ya owe me.”

“Our deal’s over, Bane!” The shopkeeper insisted. “I paid what I owe you, now leave me be.” 

“Ya did, but den ya took somethin’ else.”

The shopkeeper paused, trying to understand what the man could be referring to. He’d made a deal with the outlaw, and he’d paid him back, although reluctantly. Bane had insisted he owed more, something about accrued fees. But when he’d refused to pay more, he’d caught a glimpse of silver out of the corner of his eye. An animal. “Is this about that stupid coyote?!”

Bane’s lip curled, breaking his calm demeanor. It was the only warning the man got before the outlaw drew his weapon with inhuman speed and shot him dead. The woman couldn’t help the cry that escaped her. She had grown too comfortable with Cad Bane, and had forgotten that he was a cold blooded killer. He hadn’t even hesitated. She turned to run, but he quickly gained on her and took her by the arm. She struggled in his grip until he reminded her of their deal. She’d stopped fighting him when they heard a voice call out. “WHO’S OUT THERE??!!”. 

“Shit!” Bane had been correct about the Sheriff, but he hadn’t factored in that Vanth would have left a new deputy to watch the town while he was away. They couldn’t see the man in question, but a poorly aimed shot fired over their heads. “Comeon!” She didn’t have to be told twice. They retreated back on the horse, and this time the woman sat behind Bane, clinging to the man as he dug his heels in. Rana gained speed quickly. Behind them came more wild gunfire.The woman hated to admit it, but the sheriff really was bad at finding competent people to assist him. 

They cleared the town, and could now see the deputy in pursuit, although they were losing him quickly. Even with two riders, Rana was the fastest horse the woman had ever ridden. They would easily get away, but the woman was filled with fear. Trying to gain control of her emotions, she buried her face in Bane’s back, not caring if he noticed or not. The deputy had seen them. She could never return home now, because she was a criminal. She had lived her whole life being a decent person who never caused trouble, and Cad Bane had taken that away from her. 

Their pursuer was long gone, but Rana didn’t slow down as they made their way deep into the forest. It was night now, and the woman could see the light of the full moon through the trees. She was so lost in her thoughts that she jumped a bit when Bane whistled once more. Before she could ask him what he kept calling to, the same howl responded, but this time nearby. Rana slowed as Bane took them toward the direction of the sound. 

“Todo, come’ere.” Bane called out. Through the brush came a small, silver coyote, yipping and wagging its tail. They came to a stop, and the man dismounted, followed quickly by the woman who didn’t want to be ejected again. The coyote circled him, panting happily. He was unique enough, with his unusual silver fur that glowed in the moonlight, but it was his glowing yellow eyes that stuck out the most. 

“He’s like a ghost.” The woman commented aloud. 

“He is.” Bane’s reply took her by surprise and she almost laughed. But she quickly realized he was serious. The man knelt down and Todo went to lick his face, which he begrudgingly allowed. He stroked the animals’ long ears and spoke in that gentle voice she’d only heard him use for Rana. “I went back an’got him, Todo.”

The woman was understandably confused. “If Todo is a ghost, how come we can see him? How can you touch a ghost??”

Bane straightened and touched the brim of his hat to hide the top half of his face. It was like he was unsure about how to answer her. Probably because he didn’t want to seem crazy. “Dese woods work differently. Dark Woods I call em, since it’s always night here. Guess death don’t work de same ‘ere either. Todo ain’t de first ghost I’ve seen, an’dey’ve all been dis way. Same as dey were in life, ‘cept de eyes.”

Todo continued to show his happiness, circling and wagging his tail, and as he turned the woman saw a dark hole in his side. A bullet wound. “He’s…” She didn’t want to admit it out loud. This couldn’t be happening. The coyote was known to follow Bane around, often joining him in town and robbing people when they weren’t looking. That explained why he was shot, but the woman had one more question. “How did you know he was a ghost?”

“I didn’t.”

The woman recalled the first time he’d whistled and there’d been no response. Only when they were heading back into town did the man try one more time. Which meant, regardless of whether the coyote had passed on or not, Bane had always intended to avenge Todo.

Todo stopped in his tracks, tail tense and ears alert like he’d heard something. He turned away from them and trotted off, head down. Bane followed and although every rational inner voice told her to flee while his back was turned, the woman followed as well. The trees gave way to a cliff and Bane hunched down. “Get down.” 

She obeyed and crept forward to see what they were looking at. Below them they saw men on horseback. Lamps out as they navigated their way through the darkness. The woman recognized Sheriff Vanth and his posse, who had given up the pursuit and were headed back to town. 

Cad Bane drew his weapon, holding it in his hand like he was fantasizing about ending their game of outlaw and sheriff now. Hours ago, the woman would have tried to stop him, or shout down a warning, but now she sat quietly beside him. She knew he wouldn’t do it. 

“I FOUND YOU!” The shouting voice from behind them startled the four outlaws. It was the deputy. What shitty luck that the idiot had caught them while they were distracted. The man’s gun was drawn and pointed right at Bane. “I HAVE HIM!” He shouted again. The grin on his face widened even more as below them Sheriff Vanth was alerted and started heading up their way. He’d only been promoted that afternoon, but now he’d managed to do what no other person had: capture the notorious Cad Bane. 

He had been so distracted by his catch that he’d forgotten the woman. Bane was a terrible man, and one day he would deserve his justice. But not today. She charged the Deputy, knocking into him and tried to pry his gun from his hand. They were so entangled that Bane couldn’t risk a shot until it was too late. The bullet hit her, killing her as her body fell backwards to the ground. But the woman remained where she stood. She looked back, and saw her lifeless body on the forest floor. Dead. She was…

… fading. She willed herself to stay, fighting to remain on this mortal plane as she heard Cad Bane shout for her. She saw him shoot the deputy.  

… fading.

The sheriff and his men had appeared and caught Bane. 

“No!” The woman tried to shout as Sheriff Vanth looked down at her body and blamed the outlaw. “He didn’t do it!.” She tried again, but her voice wouldn’t carry. 

… fading.

“Hang him!”

“He didn’t do anything wrong, please don’t…” She pleaded with the last of her will. 

…

The bullet passed through her. Confused, the woman stepped back, almost falling over her own body on the forest floor. She remembered. She remembered everything! She searched around and saw Todo had now joined Rana, staring at the two of them with his blank eyes. Cad Bane stepped closer to her and by the light of the fire she could see the dark marks on his neck. She gasped as she looked up at his glowing ghost eyes. It didn’t matter if it was her fault or not, she blamed herself. He didn’t deserve to be here. 

“This doesn’t have to be our curse.” The woman reasoned, hoping to quell his anger at the injustice. “It’s over, we can move on. Wait– why am I here?” Despite fighting it, she had eventually let go. She had no reason to stay, and yet here she was.

The corner of Cad Bane’s mouth curled into the first smile the woman had seen from the man. 

“Lil’ Lady, yer mine til mornin’. At dawn I promise t’leave ya be and never bother ya again.”

The woman looked up. The trees were so tall that before she thought they blotted out the sun. But now she knew there was no sun to hide. Only the glow of the moon. 

—-

Authors Notes:

I tried to be less vague in this part, because I confused some people last time. But feel free to ask any questions you still have!

"This isn't your style, Mr. Bane." - A reference to part 1, where I originally had Cad Bane kill reader to use her place for a hideout. For me, this came across as out of character for Bane, and I was glad I could fix that plot hole here.

Finally I reveal that Todo is a coyote in my western au. Some of my followers may remember my coyote headcanons for Cad Bane. While I originally intended to make Todo a person, his personality and relationship with Bane works better if he’s an animal. More on yote Todo later.

At the moment, this story is not canon to my western AU. An AU to my AU I suppose.

Rana is the horse I designed for Cad Bane

[thescrapbookingscientist]

Bimonthly Media Roundup

- Blue Eye Samurai (TV) - Heard a lot of buzz around this and decided to check it out with my family, which in hindsight I do not recommend doing (Lots of sex). While I'm not sure I agree with everyone who put it on the top of their best of 2023 lists as it's currently incomplete story and slight tonal issues don't lend it to masterpiece status, I do see the hype - I quite liked it. The art direction was incredible and Mizu's character design and presentation were peak, It was engaging throughout with a lot of good dialogue and reveals, and the fight choreography was fire. I might do a rewatch sometime soon as I think it lends itself well to one.

- Pokemon Legends Arceus (Video Games) - Played while on vacation, mostly during the plane rides, in order to finish up some quests I had unknowingly forgot post game. It was fun to revisit, though I don't quite want to replay it anytime soon. Anyway I still really like a lot of the hisuain designs and animations even if the games visuals weren't exactly top notch.

- The Gray Man (Movie) - Vacation watch with my dad, mediocre action movie with a decent premise but lackluster end. Chris Evans was clearly having fun so good for him and I did like how often they switched locations but overall the movie was pretty predictable with not a lot of interesting characters or themes or anything. Still it was fine, nothing offense just nothing deep.

- The S classes that I Raised (Webcomic) - Yup yup.

- Cyberpunk Edgerunners (Anime) - Not much to say yet but I like the animation style and instrumentals so far.

- Delicious in Dungeon (Anime) - Lovely so far, makes me very hungry while watching and as a fellow monster lover Laois being an autistic boy with a monster hyper-fixation is great. I've been told the world-building here is really great and the story gets surprisingly complex so looking forward to that, though I like the simplicity and gradual details of these first episodes as well.

- Mage and Demon Queen (Webcomic) - Still reading, still cute.

- One Piece (Anime) - Going through a little bit slower thanks to a one week vacation to Arizona, but we've made it through the Time Skip and Fishman Island arc. I am excited to see the New World and everyone's new abilities, but I'm pretty disappointed in how almost all of the time skip designs are downgrades from the originals - why are they all so white?? Oh well at least they change outfits frequently. Fishman Island was fine, I think it dragged quite a bit and the villain was lame but I like Jinbe and getting more world lore and downtime with the straw hats.

- Genshin Impact (Video Game) - Was happy to see some Yanfei crumbs in the last event, looking forward to Lantern Rite.

Listening To: Turn the Lights Off by Tally Hall, How Did You Love by Shinedown, The Moon Will Sing by The Crane Wives, Bad Idea Right? by Olivia Rodrigo, Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift, Dial Drunk by Noah Kahan, All the Boys by Panic! at the Disco, Can’t Catch Me Now cover by Annapantsu, Better Than I Know Myself by Adam Lambert, As it Was cover by Reinaeiry

[fullofsunsetwhispers]

No one needs to convince me that it was Jack's initiative to wear cowboy outfits in the 'Treasure of the Blind Swordsman' episode. However, I'm sort of disappointed we didn't get a scene in which Jack tries to persuade Wuya to dress up.

‘What if there are more wus hidden in Texas, Wuya? We definitely should change into Evil cowboy Genius and Heylin cowgirl witch sometime.'

Wuya would only roll her eyes when Jack brings up the issue because the boy as always gets too hyped up.

In my mind, Jack had prepared a list of arguments for such an idea. 'C'mon monks already went full-cowboy that one time and we couldn't do that because you were all GHOSTY back then!'

‘wuya wuya lemmie show you the art of online shopping’ ‘partners in crime should have matching outfits sometimes!

So, he would mix the most ridiculous reasons with the more practical ones. Wuya would start actually listening to him once he mentions they need cowboy disguises in order to better blend in.

Eventually, she agrees because the clothes Jack showed her really were her style and she wanted to wear them!

‘Ok, fine we can buy them. I can’t remember the last time I wore trousers. Nice call, Jack.’ - she would sum up in one sentence.

And oh boy, I bet Jack was so excited to see Wuya’s cooperating in his silly antics. So, certain he is lucky enough today, he starts suggesting more. ‘Oh, I should, like, build a whole ass train, Wuya. And my jackbots would be stylized to be cowboy bandits, I have to order as many cowboy hats as possible’

Wuya got used to Jack doing everything for aesthetics so she would not interfere. Tho, she would keep on reminding him the wu is soon to be revealed, and thus, she sets up a deadline:‘Just hurry with these’ – she reminds him every now and then.

And when the wu activates, they come prepared. Even they have their own horses in that episode!

What's even better Jack's horse has a red mane!!! Ain't that cool?

I have no idea if these horses were rented/stolen but it has to be admitted it is quite rare to see a horse with a red mane, right? So, I also came up with a wholesome idea.

Let's assume Wuya and Jack entered a stable to choose their animal companions. And Jack, as always, utters some nonsense. (for me it's not stupid but for Wuya IT IS). He tells her, he will pick the most goth-looking horse here. Wuya gets irritated, of course, because it indicates that Jack is about to examine every horse and this way they lose more time on something unnecessary. She already picked her horse, it is Jack, who is stalling!

Sometime later Jack sadly informs Wuya there are no black horses. Wuya is not much of a help. She commands him to make a final decision. Then, Jack spots the one horse, which he had missed. He fell in love immediately once he realized the horse is a redhead, just like him!

'Wuya! Wuya! He's just like me!' -the boy exclaims. Then, Wuya throws a few insults but Jack can't even hear them. He approaches the horse, grabs some ice cubes from his pocket, and hands the offering. The horse licks his hand and once the snack is gone, Jack gives the horse some head pats.

I hc Jack is good at horse riding because it is his mother's favorite sports discipline. (I assumed it bc the Spicers are hella rich so why not make Mrs. Spicer fixated on horse-riding) So, he knows how to recognize an excellent steed.

I only wanted to write down that Jack is such a sweetheart when he takes care of animals. It was proved when he had that little dino-army. Hence, my suggestion he's as good at taking care of horses. Now I want more 'Jack likes horses' content.