#he believes in the importance of 'whatever floats your boat' and the idea that you would hate yourself for wanting something different...

[llamagoddessofficial]

I like to imagine that sans and skull would help you if they find out you feel a lot of self loathing for being asexual. I’m unfortunately asexual and I constantly struggle with the feeling that I’ll never find a guy because of it, or that if I do get in a relationship it’ll be “less” because it doesn’t involve sex. God I wish I was born differently lmao

Skull would pull you aside into a gentle cuddle, and the two of you would have a beautiful heart-to-heart where he uses the few words he has available to tell you how much he loves you. He'd list all the things he adores about you, all of them nothing to do with sex, he'd explain how you're so much more than that, how you're perfect and he's relieved you don't expect that of him, how you're not lesser for not doing something that makes you uncomfortable...

And Sans would just say some shit like "babe, why would we have sex when we could both be sleeping?" then make 'snork mimimi' sounds until you laugh at him

[asterpollux]

I'm seeking 1x1 Discord based RP again, friends. Specifically as one of two of my characters really, though I am always open to making more OCs if need be as long as the idea floats my boat and you think we'd vibe!

I am a lazylit, 1-4 paragraph in 3rd person writer. I'm here to have fun, not fill word count quotas, and I really dig people who feel the same. I love open and communicative partners who are just as excited about their OCs as I am about mine. I'd love to get some MxM, NBixNBi or MxNBi (with me playing either of those) plots going tbh. Will consider FxNBi for the one NBi OC if I like your idea, but no promises.

Please go on my blog and read my pinned post before you contact me. Some short notices before I get into it: I am 32, you should be over 21 to RP with me, and your muse should be over 21 or, even better, over 25. No anime/manga faceclaims. Nothing too 'off the wall' either. I won't RP against a Hazbin Hotel character for example. My links aren't done yet but I can ping some stuff over if you're interested.

These characters, and their accompanying plots/universes, are generally made for adults only. They are adults, they do adult things, and I too am an adult that wants to write about adult things. So smut, sex, whatever you want to call it is inevitable. I don't mind sometimes fading to black but sex and sensuality are important to both of these characters' stories and I don't want to totally ignore that!

As such, I'm only really looking for people who are cool with a good smattering of smut and kink, and some heavier topics too, which can include Omegaverse if we decide to go that route, cruising & cottaging, anonymous sex and all that comes with that, underworld supernatural goings on, kink of varying types (of course that's depending on your preferences and mine, and how they mesh!)... Just, be mature and willing to write about adult things.

Now onto what I'm looking for. I have two characters inhabiting my brainbits at the moment.

CIARAN O'CONNOR [FC: David Tennant in Good Omens] (which is just one of the many aliases that he has gone by) is lonely. He's been lonely and hungry, in fact, for the past 1200 years. Bitten and turned by a vampire long since perished, when he was at the ripe age of 48, Ciaran has wandered the Earth for a time longer than most people find possible to even imagine. Cursed to walk alone forever, or so he thinks, he pushes away anyone who tries to get close, believing that they will be in mortal peril if they so much as befriend him.

I'm looking for ideally a Male or Nonbinary character to play alongside this Masculine Nonbinary character, but I'll consider Female characters too for Ciaran, for a modern with supernatural plot. Give me fellow vampires, werewolves, the undead, selkies, shapeshifters/changelings! I'd love to find him a Werewolf to play against to teach him how to love and find companionship after 1200 years of loneliness, and maybe we could introduce some omegaaverse shenanigans in there too if that is a thing you also enjoy.

PROFESSOR LEON RITTER [FC: Michael Sheen in Good Omens] - a literature professor - has newly moved to [city of our choosing] from Berlin. He's looking for a few things, chief amongst them for his past to stop following him around. He's a simple man who lives for writing and his books, as well as his pet Chihuahua, Betty. He seeks solace in stories... And sometimes in the darker corners of the city's streets and parks, too.

I'm looking for Male or Masculine Nonbinary characters to play alongside this Cis Male character. This plot is more grounded in reality than the previous, and has no supernatural or fantasy elements, (unless we decide to do something like modern omegaverse? IDK, I am open to that though!) I'd quite like to go one of two ways with him - a younger person, maybe a mature student in his classes, finds out what he does at night and at the weekends, simply by coincidence because they're also out cruising and cottaging, too. Or alternatively someone to calm him down and make him take care of himself for once.

I really, REALLY want to keep their face claims as is. I don't enjoy playing gym bunnies or most models, and want to keep their approx ages as they are also. It's the one thing I'm really inflexible on this time around folks, sorry if you're not a GO fan I guess!

If you're interested in plotting or chatting about either of these folks, please message me on oli.writes.stuff on Discord and we can get something worked out! <3

[findroleplay]

I'm seeking 1x1 Discord based RP again, friends. Specifically as one of two of my characters really, though I am always open to making more OCs if need be as long as the idea floats my boat and you think we'd vibe!

I am a lazylit, 1-4 paragraph in 3rd person writer. I'm here to have fun, not fill word count quotas, and I really dig people who feel the same. I love open and communicative partners who are just as excited about their OCs as I am about mine. I'd love to get some MxM, NBixNBi or MxNBi (with me playing either of those) plots going tbh. Will consider FxNBi for the one NBi OC if I like your idea, but no promises.

Please go on my blog and read my pinned post before you contact me. Some short notices before I get into it: I am 32, you should be over 21 to RP with me, and your muse should be over 21 or, even better, over 25. No anime/manga faceclaims. Nothing too 'off the wall' either. I won't RP against a Hazbin Hotel character for example. My links aren't done yet but I can ping some stuff over if you're interested.

These characters, and their accompanying plots/universes, are generally made for adults only. They are adults, they do adult things, and I too am an adult that wants to write about adult things. So smut, sex, whatever you want to call it is inevitable. I don't mind sometimes fading to black but sex and sensuality are important to both of these characters' stories and I don't want to totally ignore that!

As such, I'm only really looking for people who are cool with a good smattering of smut and kink, and some heavier topics too, which can include Omegaverse if we decide to go that route, cruising & cottaging, anonymous sex and all that comes with that, underworld supernatural goings on, kink of varying types (of course that's depending on your preferences and mine, and how they mesh!)... Just, be mature and willing to write about adult things.

Now onto what I'm looking for. I have two characters inhabiting my brainbits at the moment.

CIARAN O'CONNOR [FC: David Tennant in Good Omens] (which is just one of the many aliases that he has gone by) is lonely. He's been lonely and hungry, in fact, for the past 1200 years. Bitten and turned by a vampire long since perished, when he was at the ripe age of 48, Ciaran has wandered the Earth for a time longer than most people find possible to even imagine. Cursed to walk alone forever, or so he thinks, he pushes away anyone who tries to get close, believing that they will be in mortal peril if they so much as befriend him.

I'm looking for ideally a Male or Nonbinary character to play alongside this Masculine Nonbinary character, but I'll consider Female characters too for Ciaran, for a modern with supernatural plot. Give me fellow vampires, werewolves, the undead, selkies, shapeshifters/changelings! I'd love to find him a Werewolf to play against to teach him how to love and find companionship after 1200 years of loneliness, and maybe we could introduce some omegaaverse shenanigans in there too if that is a thing you also enjoy.

PROFESSOR LEON RITTER [FC: Michael Sheen in Good Omens] - a literature professor - has newly moved to [city of our choosing] from Berlin. He's looking for a few things, chief amongst them for his past to stop following him around. He's a simple man who lives for writing and his books, as well as his pet Chihuahua, Betty. He seeks solace in stories... And sometimes in the darker corners of the city's streets and parks, too.

I'm looking for Male or Masculine Nonbinary characters to play alongside this Cis Male character. This plot is more grounded in reality than the previous, and has no supernatural or fantasy elements, (unless we decide to do something like modern omegaverse? IDK, I am open to that though!) I'd quite like to go one of two ways with him - a younger person, maybe a mature student in his classes, finds out what he does at night and at the weekends, simply by coincidence because they're also out cruising and cottaging, too. Or alternatively someone to calm him down and make him take care of himself for once.

I really, REALLY want to keep their face claims as is. I don't enjoy playing gym bunnies or most models, and want to keep their approx ages as they are also. It's the one thing I'm really inflexible on this time around folks, sorry if you're not a GO fan I guess!

If you're interested in plotting or chatting about either of these folks, please message me on oli.writes.stuff on Discord and we can get something worked out! <3

-

[rp-partnerfinder]

I'm seeking 1x1 Discord based RP again, friends. Specifically as one of two of my characters really, though I am always open to making more OCs if need be as long as the idea floats my boat and you think we'd vibe!

I am a lazylit, 1-4 paragraph in 3rd person writer. I'm here to have fun, not fill word count quotas, and I really dig people who feel the same. I love open and communicative partners who are just as excited about their OCs as I am about mine. I'd love to get some MxM, NBixNBi or MxNBi (with me playing either of those) plots going tbh. Will consider FxNBi for the one NBi OC if I like your idea, but no promises.

Please go on my blog and read my pinned post before you contact me. Some short notices before I get into it: I am 32, you should be over 21 to RP with me, and your muse should be over 21 or, even better, over 25. No anime/manga faceclaims. Nothing too 'off the wall' either. I won't RP against a Hazbin Hotel character for example. My links aren't done yet but I can ping some stuff over if you're interested.

These characters, and their accompanying plots/universes, are generally made for adults only. They are adults, they do adult things, and I too am an adult that wants to write about adult things. So smut, sex, whatever you want to call it is inevitable. I don't mind sometimes fading to black but sex and sensuality are important to both of these characters' stories and I don't want to totally ignore that!

As such, I'm only really looking for people who are cool with a good smattering of smut and kink, and some heavier topics too, which can include Omegaverse if we decide to go that route, cruising & cottaging, anonymous sex and all that comes with that, underworld supernatural goings on, kink of varying types (of course that's depending on your preferences and mine, and how they mesh!)... Just, be mature and willing to write about adult things.

Now onto what I'm looking for. I have two characters inhabiting my brainbits at the moment.

CIARAN O'CONNOR [FC: David Tennant in Good Omens] (which is just one of the many aliases that he has gone by) is lonely. He's been lonely and hungry, in fact, for the past 1200 years. Bitten and turned by a vampire long since perished, when he was at the ripe age of 48, Ciaran has wandered the Earth for a time longer than most people find possible to even imagine. Cursed to walk alone forever, or so he thinks, he pushes away anyone who tries to get close, believing that they will be in mortal peril if they so much as befriend him.

I'm looking for ideally a Male or Nonbinary character to play alongside this Masculine Nonbinary character, but I'll consider Female characters too for Ciaran, for a modern with supernatural plot. Give me fellow vampires, werewolves, the undead, selkies, shapeshifters/changelings! I'd love to find him a Werewolf to play against to teach him how to love and find companionship after 1200 years of loneliness, and maybe we could introduce some omegaaverse shenanigans in there too if that is a thing you also enjoy.

PROFESSOR LEON RITTER [FC: Michael Sheen in Good Omens] - a literature professor - has newly moved to [city of our choosing] from Berlin. He's looking for a few things, chief amongst them for his past to stop following him around. He's a simple man who lives for writing and his books, as well as his pet Chihuahua, Betty. He seeks solace in stories... And sometimes in the darker corners of the city's streets and parks, too.

I'm looking for Male or Masculine Nonbinary characters to play alongside this Cis Male character. This plot is more grounded in reality than the previous, and has no supernatural or fantasy elements, (unless we decide to do something like modern omegaverse? IDK, I am open to that though!) I'd quite like to go one of two ways with him - a younger person, maybe a mature student in his classes, finds out what he does at night and at the weekends, simply by coincidence because they're also out cruising and cottaging, too. Or alternatively someone to calm him down and make him take care of himself for once.

I really, REALLY want to keep their face claims as is. I don't enjoy playing gym bunnies or most models, and want to keep their approx ages as they are also. It's the one thing I'm really inflexible on this time around folks, sorry if you're not a GO fan I guess!

If you're interested in plotting or chatting about either of these folks, please message me on oli.writes.stuff on Discord and we can get something worked out! <3

.

[omegaverserping]

I'm seeking 1x1 Discord based RP again, friends. Specifically as one of two of my characters really, though I am always open to making more OCs if need be as long as the idea floats my boat and you think we'd vibe!

I am a lazylit, 1-4 paragraph in 3rd person writer. I'm here to have fun, not fill word count quotas, and I really dig people who feel the same. I love open and communicative partners who are just as excited about their OCs as I am about mine. I'd love to get some MxM, NBixNBi or MxNBi (with me playing either of those) plots going tbh. Will consider FxNBi for the one NBi OC if I like your idea, but no promises.

Please go on my blog and read my pinned post before you contact me. Some short notices before I get into it: I am 32, you should be over 21 to RP with me, and your muse should be over 21 or, even better, over 25. No anime/manga faceclaims. Nothing too 'off the wall' either. I won't RP against a Hazbin Hotel character for example. My links aren't done yet but I can ping some stuff over if you're interested.

These characters, and their accompanying plots/universes, are generally made for adults only. They are adults, they do adult things, and I too am an adult that wants to write about adult things. So smut, sex, whatever you want to call it is inevitable. I don't mind sometimes fading to black but sex and sensuality are important to both of these characters' stories and I don't want to totally ignore that!

As such, I'm only really looking for people who are cool with a good smattering of smut and kink, and some heavier topics too, which can include Omegaverse if we decide to go that route, cruising & cottaging, anonymous sex and all that comes with that, underworld supernatural goings on, kink of varying types (of course that's depending on your preferences and mine, and how they mesh!)... Just, be mature and willing to write about adult things.

Now onto what I'm looking for. I have two characters inhabiting my brainbits at the moment.

CIARAN O'CONNOR [FC: David Tennant in Good Omens] (which is just one of the many aliases that he has gone by) is lonely. He's been lonely and hungry, in fact, for the past 1200 years. Bitten and turned by a vampire long since perished, when he was at the ripe age of 48, Ciaran has wandered the Earth for a time longer than most people find possible to even imagine. Cursed to walk alone forever, or so he thinks, he pushes away anyone who tries to get close, believing that they will be in mortal peril if they so much as befriend him.

I'm looking for ideally a Male or Nonbinary character to play alongside this Masculine Nonbinary character, but I'll consider Female characters too for Ciaran, for a modern with supernatural plot. Give me fellow vampires, werewolves, the undead, selkies, shapeshifters/changelings! I'd love to find him a Werewolf to play against to teach him how to love and find companionship after 1200 years of loneliness, and maybe we could introduce some omegaaverse shenanigans in there too if that is a thing you also enjoy.

PROFESSOR LEON RITTER [FC: Michael Sheen in Good Omens] - a literature professor - has newly moved to [city of our choosing] from Berlin. He's looking for a few things, chief amongst them for his past to stop following him around. He's a simple man who lives for writing and his books, as well as his pet Chihuahua, Betty. He seeks solace in stories... And sometimes in the darker corners of the city's streets and parks, too.

I'm looking for Male or Masculine Nonbinary characters to play alongside this Cis Male character. This plot is more grounded in reality than the previous, and has no supernatural or fantasy elements, (unless we decide to do something like modern omegaverse? IDK, I am open to that though!) I'd quite like to go one of two ways with him - a younger person, maybe a mature student in his classes, finds out what he does at night and at the weekends, simply by coincidence because they're also out cruising and cottaging, too. Or alternatively someone to calm him down and make him take care of himself for once.

I really, REALLY want to keep their face claims as is. I don't enjoy playing gym bunnies or most models, and want to keep their approx ages as they are also. It's the one thing I'm really inflexible on this time around folks, sorry if you're not a GO fan I guess!

If you're interested in plotting or chatting about either of these folks, please message me on oli.writes.stuff on Discord and we can get something worked out! <3

/

[darkrpfinder]

I'm seeking 1x1 Discord based RP again, friends. Specifically as one of two of my characters really, though I am always open to making more OCs if need be as long as the idea floats my boat and you think we'd vibe!

I am a lazylit, 1-4 paragraph in 3rd person writer. I'm here to have fun, not fill word count quotas, and I really dig people who feel the same. I love open and communicative partners who are just as excited about their OCs as I am about mine. I'd love to get some MxM, NBixNBi or MxNBi (with me playing either of those) plots going tbh. Will consider FxNBi for the one NBi OC if I like your idea, but no promises.

Please go on my blog and read my pinned post before you contact me. Some short notices before I get into it: I am 32, you should be over 21 to RP with me, and your muse should be over 21 or, even better, over 25. No anime/manga faceclaims. Nothing too 'off the wall' either. I won't RP against a Hazbin Hotel character for example. My links aren't done yet but I can ping some stuff over if you're interested.

These characters, and their accompanying plots/universes, are generally made for adults only. They are adults, they do adult things, and I too am an adult that wants to write about adult things. So smut, sex, whatever you want to call it is inevitable. I don't mind sometimes fading to black but sex and sensuality are important to both of these characters' stories and I don't want to totally ignore that!

As such, I'm only really looking for people who are cool with a good smattering of smut and kink, and some heavier topics too, which can include Omegaverse if we decide to go that route, cruising & cottaging, anonymous sex and all that comes with that, underworld supernatural goings on, kink of varying types (of course that's depending on your preferences and mine, and how they mesh!)... Just, be mature and willing to write about adult things.

Now onto what I'm looking for. I have two characters inhabiting my brainbits at the moment.

CIARAN O'CONNOR [FC: David Tennant in Good Omens] (which is just one of the many aliases that he has gone by) is lonely. He's been lonely and hungry, in fact, for the past 1200 years. Bitten and turned by a vampire long since perished, when he was at the ripe age of 48, Ciaran has wandered the Earth for a time longer than most people find possible to even imagine. Cursed to walk alone forever, or so he thinks, he pushes away anyone who tries to get close, believing that they will be in mortal peril if they so much as befriend him.

I'm looking for ideally a Male or Nonbinary character to play alongside this Masculine Nonbinary character, but I'll consider Female characters too for Ciaran, for a modern with supernatural plot. Give me fellow vampires, werewolves, the undead, selkies, shapeshifters/changelings! I'd love to find him a Werewolf to play against to teach him how to love and find companionship after 1200 years of loneliness, and maybe we could introduce some omegaaverse shenanigans in there too if that is a thing you also enjoy.

PROFESSOR LEON RITTER [FC: Michael Sheen in Good Omens] - a literature professor - has newly moved to [city of our choosing] from Berlin. He's looking for a few things, chief amongst them for his past to stop following him around. He's a simple man who lives for writing and his books, as well as his pet Chihuahua, Betty. He seeks solace in stories... And sometimes in the darker corners of the city's streets and parks, too.

I'm looking for Male or Masculine Nonbinary characters to play alongside this Cis Male character. This plot is more grounded in reality than the previous, and has no supernatural or fantasy elements, (unless we decide to do something like modern omegaverse? IDK, I am open to that though!) I'd quite like to go one of two ways with him - a younger person, maybe a mature student in his classes, finds out what he does at night and at the weekends, simply by coincidence because they're also out cruising and cottaging, too. Or alternatively someone to calm him down and make him take care of himself for once.

I really, REALLY want to keep their face claims as is. I don't enjoy playing gym bunnies or most models, and want to keep their approx ages as they are also. It's the one thing I'm really inflexible on this time around folks, sorry if you're not a GO fan I guess!

If you're interested in plotting or chatting about either of these folks, please message me on oli.writes.stuff on Discord and we can get something worked out! <3

oli.writes.stuff

[sugar-petals]

SuperM as Boyfriends Headcanon

↪ caro’s note. extra long version because i miss ‘em. best boys, they’re all bf material to the moon and back ♡

5k words | bullet points

○ warnings ⚠️ 18+, dom/sub play, shibari, female reader, grinding, poly mentions, threesomes, face-sitting, femdom & vanilla, smut and fluff

⌈ ten

— motto: they won’t underestimate me for long.

most of your social environment is gonna be confused by ten at the beginning 

and don’t really get what he’s all about

or think he���s like whatever, some random guy in a tank top

acting peculiar

finding him kind of hard to gauge

some of your family and relatives might even think he’s totally unusual and a sneaky fuckboy making you mad 

they seriously wonder what you see in him

down the line that perception has turned by 180 degrees

as it should

ten becomes more irreplaceable, relatable, beautiful, perfect and impressive the more you know him

he’s not as mysterious and impossibly badass as everyone assumes

his personality is very approachable to you 

and you find him interesting in every aspect, looks to hobbies to background to personal habits

and also opinions because ten is a guy who really thinks stuff through

so you gotta be roughly on the same wavelength 

he likes discussing controversial and complicated stuff a lot for sure

being far wiser than his age suggests 

you are the first to share those things with him until the rest of the world catches up to this gem of a person

spending so much time with you

in the most personal way he can

he takes you to see the floating markets in bangkok, you spend the summer in thailand

wakeboarding and playing badminton

his entire family knows you inside out at some point this shit is serious

it’s very important to him to go back to the roots every now and then

and that you have been around his home city as well

getting to enjoy the area and time together eating the most savory delicacies

renting a boat and paddling you around to the important spots, he can explain any question you have

this kissing is gonna be so romantic 

who needs a vacation in venice when you can go to thailand with none other than ten himself as your ferryman let that sink in

except eating durian there he is, the boyfriend who can do anything!

with seemingly no effort

ten does little kind services of love for you throughout the day

he pours you herbal tea, fixes some furniture (he’s surprisingly good at tinkering), comes home from the bakery with your favorite pastry, does the laundry with your favorite fabric softener

he also goes on a huge shopping spree with you monthly because fashion is key in this household and it’s tremendous fun

you giggle when he puts on oversized shirts deliberately to look funny

everyone in the clothing store will think oh man what an adorable pair

ten will model the living hell out of the entire stock

and buy you the cape you really really want as a birthday present

said item turns out to be your favorite couple accessory

because you can sit next to each other on a bench at the river and wear it

what’s not to love about a portable blanket

of course he will take to instagram and make it such a cool thing, photographies of you wearing really cool coats and jackets

mirror bathroom selfies together as well, with a back hug, the classic

and not just for insta

you snuggle a lot generally

ten is always available for affection

and accepts all PDA

he’s a kitty after all, he loves the warmth of your body more than you know

remember how taemin said ten’s hands are always cold, newsflash not anymore since you stuff them into the pocket of your hoodie whenever you can

and hello sir your paws will be nice and cozy on my waist

or hand in hand when you waltz through your apartment

time for dance is a must

oh my god ten is so good at all of this

although say he’s definitely faster into latin than standard genres

tango argentino, he loves flamenco as well

don’t believe me? ten is a diehard rosalía stan!

vamos

so, no-brainer, expect a lot of dancy stuff 

that escalates into wild, passionate fucking

which probably looks like an aggressive form of couple exercises

you poor sore souls

ten’s lil kitty butt is falling apart from all the “i can handle a bigger one!”-level pegging and you have aching legs all over

favorite position? full nelson

if you ask me ten’s ass is probably so carved out by the end of this you could fit lucas and kai in there from head to toe

this is not for the faint of heart

sex with this guy is extra cardio

and if you’re into that a threesome is gonna go down sooner or later

with our girl lisa

there. i said it

miss manoban in those knee-high boots, grinding her thighs between yours and you finishing off on ten’s face? the fucking hottest thing ever i need a moment wow

i don’t have to tell you how orgasmic this is gonna be

steamy sex life with ten very recommended

⌈ kai

— motto: you’re like a precious rose. i’ll protect you forever.

to be straightforward with you

he is in so heavily in demand it’s madness

to give you an idea of the scale

mark is basically occupied by yuta until the end of time 

but kai has an entire idol fanclub on top of all erigoms

those sharp moves did not go unnoticed

he gets an inkigayo sandwich every other day

jesus christ

if rent-a-sexy-bf.com was a thing kai would be the most requested

his phone would be blowing up with contracts like

and you also have to pass kyungsoo’s vibe check

and taemin’s

the road to being kai’s gf is indeed the way of the samurai

i mean honestly: kim jongin is without a doubt the hardest member to get a date with

this has got to be the most selective man of the entire industry or something

if he likes you he REALLY likes you

and he will be the one showing initiative

because he wants to make it clear he isn’t just spending time out of politeness or something

although it’s pretty logical that if kai was unable to reject someone he would no longer be an idol but a harem husband busy every hour of the day

seoul would be able to found its own village 

kai town

where like 70% of the population is pregnant

but since kai wants to keep on dancing obviously and he wants to lend his heart to only one person 

seoul has to settle with a singular nini family house instead of a kai district

where you and the man himself are a full-fledged household basically since kai’s nieces double as actual kids

if you wanna be a young ass ‘mom but not mom with kids’ and be married to kim kai this is it

does he have a thing for milfs or something

that thought just came to my mind

anyway you’re mommy anyway wink wink

fucking til’ dawn until even his muscles hurt

going raw at the gym together

him cooking the most random food with the infamous waffle maker

cuddling with an army of teddy bears surrounding you

walking the dogs with the sexiest dancer alive 

and the sexiness is only the tip of the iceberg 

we know he’s all-round amazing

kai is the king of figuring out ways to chill out with you anywhere anytime

and yes innocent chilling

...unless you’re in the mood for something else

up to you

anyway

sweet innocent chilling for now... with the stunner... just smooching at best things aren’t going raw or anything

on the couch in the kitchen in the car when it’s parked somewhere in nature

kai takes you very seriously and is a great listener

he’s literally so respectful and open-minded i can’t

he will keep your secrets and stand up for you if it’s ever needed

yes he is extremely caring and invested

kai does not tolerate others being shady towards you

if there’s an instance where you are hurt and unable to assert yourself don’t worry. he knows how to confront others with measure but a firm determination.

kai takes a lot of that responsibility but only to the degree where you are comfortable

i think you get what i mean by that

and he is diplomatic instead of plain patronizing

you have a right to be protected. it means he not only treats you well, but also makes sure your well-being isn’t disturbed in any other way outside of the relationships

outside influences aren’t to be underestimated

and since kai is a godly man you encounter a lot of jealousy from others

a matter he will take into his hands since he knows he’s the reason

standing up for you also means saying no 

to these jealous voices so this is an important boundary he has to draw

that all kinds of hellbent people want to get into his pants and take his stage image too literally is not up to you to fix

kai is there for you to enjoy and love not to defend

that’d be exhausting and beside the point 

kai prevents stress and negativity to come to you

i hope i explained this well he doesn’t do this to be bossed up or make you weak it’s because he wants to make life easier for you

guys being protective will be chalked up as chauvinistic these days. often rightfully so 

but what i mean is that kai support you in all regards so you won’t be at a disadvantage or feel terrible about something

⌈ taeyong

— motto: we’ll take good care. enjoy the pleasure.

he’s the type of boyfriend who will ask you about things he missed out on while he was busy

things um from the internet

while mark literally knows that one by heart already taeyong will ask you things like what the wellerman song is

and you thought it would be something nsfw

i got you fooled

did we forget that the man literally watched nct memes on youtube

taeyong is both even more 18+ than you think but also even more innocent than you think it’s complicated

this man is just hard to describe he’s so different, i mean every person is unique but he’s an original it’s the extra mile you know

anyway

sea shanties

bopping to it all day since he just heard it 

singing it while he prepares dinner based on a youtube recipe video as he often does

he’s the most adorable person ever ever ever

asking you why shanties are back in fashion 

(good question, requires a deeper sociocultural analysis i reckon)

planning to remix one for his soundcloud lmao i kid you not

maybe your favorite shanty 

featuring fast-pace rap and all

creating his own previously unknown phrases and shit like that you know him

palazzo rocco lemon detox flashbacks

he’s hilarious i swear

taeyong will produce his own shanties for you can you imagine

as he says: my happiness is your happiness

watch out he will drop a shanty music video with extra krumping moves

taeyong is a never-ending source of pure crack

prepare to laugh a lot like, a lot lot

how can a man who seemingly has such a serious outlook on life and such a bonkers kinda face be so lighthearted

it’s like he’s peter pan or something

especially since he has to manage like over 20 brats in nct his cutesy behavior towards you as his gf will stand out to you

yeah so to be clear we all know he’s the cute one in the relationship

and guess who wears the pants

that’s always you ma’am don’t deny it

or wait 

not for long actually because they come off um physically

but not metaphorically

because who doesn’t wanna sit on his face tbh

your favorite reserved spot

he loves it

taeyong has such a thing for your body it’s ridiculous

mister lee got a sexy mama

and you have such a thing for the gloriousness that is him

but neither of you will not admit it as openly as other people would think

all there is... is being flustered

baekhyun probably has to play some cupid now and then

and give you some ideas

like gifting taeyong plushies and things like that

baekhyun knows what taeyong is all about so the advice is very welcome

but most things you find out for yourself

by being a little braver with him you know

you walking around naked in the apartment or basically fresh out the shower with nothing but a towel

will shake up taeyong so immensely, he will back himself against a wall without you even pinning him there lmao!

jeez he’s so deep into kinky stuff but easily shook anyway

i quote him again: “born to be cute, i dunno!”

you can imagine the overwhelm when you rub yourself against him like it’s nobody’s business

it’s so much fun to give taeyong a regular horny meltdown not gonna lie

this man was grinding his whole body all over the superm stage and now he’s basically freezing up and drooling

how many denied and ruined orgasms he’s gonna get, so much overstimulation all the way  

you’ll lose count of it

and just how wet you’re gonna be

is a thing for the history books

taeyong isn’t such a big deal in nct for no reason god gave him every talent 

so great sex is obviously in his repertoire

i think you’re gonna break some records for most fucks per week

you know... guys like lucas taemin kai and baekhyun spend more time wooing and teasing and flirting

but taeyong gets down to business

one glance is enough

⌈ lucas

— motto: the hottest couple around.

ah, big boy

you really got this man’s attention

doing nothing much at all really

he probably just saw you walking around talking to friends

carrying an impossibly huge veggie burger munching and enjoying yourself after going on a jog

yeah boy that’s how you catch his eye

they say love begins in the stomach and that is the true meaning

or the nose, your food smells really good, lucas is going crazy, he’s seeing stars and shit

anyway

the towering burger isn’t the only thing he wants

lucas cannot get you out of his mind no matter how much he tries to distract himself 

with more good food, movies, games

fooling around with wayv or the superm maknaes, and working out

he’s admittedly... a little himbo head over himbo heels with you the feels got to him

he’s not gonna say it’s a date he’s just gonna invite you just because

to hang out in the kitchen while taeyong cooks and baekhyun comes up with the idea to play twister

imagine lucas with his long arms and legs bending himself all over the place

fighting with kai who almost crashed his shoulders into taemin who avoided the accident quickly

making you lose a round

obviously lucas will hustle until your team wins

mostly because he’s so tall and baekhyun is so small which is a huge advantage when stacking each other over the map

let’s just face it baekhyun only suggested this game to bite everyone’s butts and to see you have skinship with lucas

which is definitely a successful plan of the leader

yukhei is in paradise 

jumping around his room like an oversized bunny after you went home

don’t lie, you fell hard for him as well he’s just such a presence

emotionally, physically

a gentle but persistent giant

he’ll do anything to make your relationship happen once he knows you’re interested

if there’s someone meant to be a boyfriend it’s gotta be him come on

he will cave in after a while and admit he can’t just forget about you 

not gonna lie

your ex is gonna be shaking in his ratty boots

his poor eyes will literally jop from their unexpecting sockets

when he sees lucas hanging out with you

with his shining blonde hair and tall stature, that perfect shapely body, with great fashion on top of that

looking like your guardian angel

man, xuxi really does

pulling you out of your slump that’s been going on for months

and bringing back smiles and a good time he knows how to do that best

and big big hugs of course

you can imagine how soothing and grounded it feels with such huge arms around you

he will make sure that feeling is always there when you need it

because you deserve that treatment

which means he will come over very very often

yeah get ready for how yukhei is a lot more driven than you think just dial and he will be there

underneath the meme surface is someone very determined who really really wants you

yukhei is chaotic good incarnate but in that area he isn’t messing around

his brain is like: “gotta be with her”

on repeat

he must call you, he literally can’t sleep without tying loose ends together as quickly as possible

no second wasted with this guy, even far down the relationship timeline

i really pity your ex 

i mean someone dating any superm member would drive their former partner completely nuts 

but lucas is a special case

he has that kind of look and aura that makes other guys dig themselves into the ground like wiggling worms or cope by fanboying over him

i don’t wanna make this sound like a competition and yet — congrats on your noodly blondie boyfriend alright

⌈ mark

— motto: two nerds in love.

how to explain this. mark is a perfect balance of a lover, a talker, and a shy bean

with a tendency toward bean

and flicking the bean

you know

cutting right to the chase are we

mark is very invested in pleasing you as good as he can

and defeating his awkwardness

because if we know one thing it’s that he always strives to become better and better like he can’t help it

and isn’t afraid of almost biting off more than he can chew

how many subunits is he part of at this point is it gonna be nct hollywood as well god dangit

back to the point mark doesn’t treat relationships and sex as something static which is a good and rare thing

he does his best and always looks for room to improve

while being very nervous, very bilingual, it takes two languages or more to express what he thinks about you let that sink in

that’s very shaky first date sex while being extremely in love with each other

lucky you

and an afterglow where he plays the guitar for you

that’s so nice 

he can play it while laying down and shit

while singing

not rapping, actual full-fledged serenading

we’ve heard how that sounds in the relay cam

are you dating some kind of teenage heartthrob or something huh

mark will make it very clear he’ll stick around, this bad bitch is here to stay

or actually, he’s a good bitch, don’t misunderstand

mark doesn’t have a lot of edgy in him unless rap is concerned

he’s the kinda guy to get lost in IKEA with 

having a good time 

as often as his schedule permits

you really have to make use of your time together 

this man might as well the busiest idol out there

and you are no different because birds of a feather

you’re both mr. and ms. independent 

out and about very often

so meeting up becomes something special during comeback season

or wait mark always has a comeback going on

which is a double-edged sword but something you both know you signed up for 

which is why you spend a lot of time around NCT dream, 127, and SuperM 

sm’s publicity agents have to work extra hard i’m telling you

a dating rumor is the last thing both of you would need

since you befriend several members you gotta stay on the low as well

but hey the rage of jealous people of the public is nothing compared to the force of nature that is yuta nakamoto

who seriously thinks himself threatened and robbed

in case you are feeling possessive as well...

...you might have to fistfight yuta

to be able to be with mark

who is basically property of osaka at this point

yuta is a scorpio that’s just the way it is

unlike taeyong who wishes his rap buddy the best, yuta kinda wants to be mark’s wingman and see him date, live his best life

but also have mark for himself to fawn over and to adore, to be fascinated by

we get it yuta. bisexual struggles. very understandable

you have to promise in person that mark doesn’t forget about the holy gaming nights with yuta 

which is hilarious since that’s not up to you but mark’s memory

bestie, yuta uses everyone as a scapegoat don’t sweat it too much

regardless you put a weekly reminder on the fridge

so the roaring lion yuta would be pacified

he doesn’t want to lose his sweetheart can you blame him

the ultimate but also most risky solution is obviously inviting yuta for movies 

which will be appreciated but also cause a storm

mark will definitely break a sweat when you start a popcorn war or try to prove who hugs mark the best 

caught in the middle of mayhem is mark lee’s specialty what did you expect

this either ends with murder or a chaotic open relationship down the line

yuta really is attached but who wouldn’t be

it could be worse mark has double the love you know 

⌈ baekhyun

— motto: you wanna know why i’m your candy?

baby tell me are you ridin’?

in fair verona where we lay our scene...

that baekhyun always wants to woo you — his way, which proves to be very interesting to say the least — is never hard to miss

putting in effort is mochi default mode 

no matter what stage of the relationship you’re in

he might as well regularly serenade you under your balcony in the backyard just because

probably singing ‘baby we can stay up’ and wiggling his ass in all directions because he’s a dirty boy gone wild

yeah. nowadays romeo is twerking instead of feuding with tybalt

that’s good for him and everyone involved

you in particular because you get some very racy eye candy

you know how baekhyun is

at least nobody’s around seeing him put on an 18+ show like that

your little guy is one unhinged fella

if it starts pouring he will grind up and down the next lantern and belt out ‘singing in the rain’

you bet he can do some actual pole dance

he’s strong and bendy you know

and loves to gyrate his whole bag of bones like... he wants to hit you with all the body rolls

in the rain

what a freaky man

but hey you wanna stay up for sure 

doesn’t take long until you beckon him to come upstairs

where the only way to alleviate him of his wet clothes—

oh well he has those roger rabbit vibes and you can’t be mad at it

he will play off all his hormonal antics

baekhyun is hilarious

and so perverted, he can keep up with your spicy idea of playing patty-cake don’t worry

how do i know you’re an extra nsfw kinda person?

who else would like baekhyun

he says juicy things all the time

and does juicy things

yes. finally a couple on eye level indeed. 

when baekhyun asks are you ridin’ you ask how hard 

bruh

this is gonna be fun

and remember

beside handing you sacks of money

his priority is always to make you smile

i’m kidding about the bags but

baekhyun is so rich it’ll show in your relationship, but he’s more about the interactions with you rather than the lifestyle

baekhyun didn’t hustle for a bentley he hustled to sing and get out of sm alive alright

financial stability: important

luxury: very nice to have, he can make you the presents you want to have and travel a lot together

but smiles: baekhyun priority

because he so badly wants to know you love him and adore him, he sometimes feels so insecure

of course you do

you always reassure him with your reactions

it’s very important to him don’t underestimate it

baekhyun has always been talking about his ideal type in terms of how he can cheer her up

so even the naughtiest sexy time evenings are gonna be filled with all giggles

anyway other than that your pussy will be dripping

because this guy is as horny as all other members of super m combined

and you have your ways of leaving him tongue-tied and wrists-tied

taemin’s impact

superm isn’t short of bondage supplies we all know that

so yeah. shibari baekhyun is gonna happen

since he does pilates imagine what kinda shapes you can bend this lil guy into

and take some pictures

privé is in trouble 

bondage model baekhyun is bursting onto the scene

you might even run a risque blog that features cropped pictures with him

heh — you think people will recognize him by his body?

nope

first: you only upload HD pictures that aren’t whitewashed

baekhyun is basically never photographed like that

second: who expects baekhyun to be featured on a bdsm blog with his girlfriend

and this is the guy that drives you around in his expensive car with his big black shades on 

well what can i say

nothing is the way it seems

⌈ taemin

— motto: i’ll unfold a whole new world for you.

taemin is cocky, he’s sensual, and: a very smiley person as we know

least boring relationship ever

he will prance toward you whenever he can to involve you in cuddles

touch-starved taemin is a thing

kkoong can tell you about it, he needs kisses and embraces so often

might as well pepper him with it no problem

and put him into your oversized sweaters when he eats ice cream on the sofa, watching movies, and you brush his ever-growing hair

he’s smol he’s gonna fit into them don’t worry

and on the other hand he likes a rough and tough girl who thinks of him like a boy toy

who acts tsundere or like his bodyguard

working out almost daily to the point of sweat all over

a gal probably able to pretzel minho lucas and chanyeol into one giant bundle

taemin truly has the taste of a divo

multi-layered as always

so you couldn’t say the relationship is always the same in sentiment, the vibe of the dynamic could be different every day

we love a complex man

what would be volatile to others is actually an advantage up close

because taemin understands every difficult facet of himself and his partner 

even if those facets might be contradictory

or something that’s felt shameful about

he will accept and listen anyway

the same goes for getting what drives you

taemin is like a walking psychology velvet couch with fancy swirls as arm rests

point is he isn’t fooled by the surface of the world

he knows what has to be known

which also means your looks aren’t the part he prioritizes

and not even outward personality and habit is what he’s drawn to

it’s the mentality and values underneath

that’s true compatibility to him and he can feel it

he’s really really smart

and also finds it important that you get along with shinee and superm, that you think they’re nice to be around and vice versa

especially kai as taemin’s absolute bearly bestie. if kai thinks you’re shady and you don’t like kai either

or if you’re permanently super awkward and taemin’s moodmaking doesn’t help

we have a problem

but fair enough

kai and taemin are basically one soul at this point so if taemin likes you jongin does anyway 

bff telepathy

in fact jongin was probably the one introducing you to taemin lmao!

because he knows you go well together instinctively and he is correct

so not to worry then

and it’s good on taemin to think longterm and not see you as a person outside of social interaction y’know

cough cough he thinks about marriage, you might be ms. lee one day

here he goes again taemin is just very mature seeing you as well-rounded in every aspect of life

without letting his dick make the important decisions at the detriment of making this a relationship of two lives not just two bodies only

but obviously don’t assume taemin is no horny devil. we all know he dreams of the freakiest scenarios and fantasies in this whole group

going kinda crazy about the thought of making you cum which he always wants to try with new methods

which occupies his mind more than a big bowl of super spicy noodles which is taemin’s favorite meal so

at the same time taemin junior is definitely the same clingy attention whore as his sparkly owner

limp wrists from all the handjobs on your side

and very swollen lips from giving all that head on his side

this is gonna be interesting

he puts the 6v6 in 69

equals 69v69 am i right

but i’m serious that’s gonna be a lot of oral action

you definitely ask each other about having sex very often, daily if you have the time and find a nice spot

and how on earth do both of you keep your hands off each other sleeping in one bed

taemin is touchy as hell with no shyness, and you squish squeeze and grope this guy like the mochi he is

ah when things go both ways

© submissive-bangtan 2017-2021. all rights reserved. do not repost or translate. all depictions fictional.

[brushstrokesapocalyptic]

it’s time for the “overanalyzing one-off lines” show!

so the very first thing magnus says when he sees pit in chapter 2 of kid icarus: uprising is as follows:

“Well, I didn’t expect to see an angel here. Hope this doesn’t mean I’ve kicked the bucket.”

now, i’m not sure if you’re aware, but that’s a really weird thing for someone to say, and it’s even more weird that no one comments on it. pit and palutena go on talking about unrelated things, as if that’s a totally normal and expected thing for magnus to say.

now, if you’re like me, you probably also didn’t really react to this line the first few times you saw it. it’s the second chapter, kiu has a lot of slightly-odd lines which turn out to be foreshadowing. me, personally? my first thought was “oh, i guess angels are probably associated with escorting the dead to the afterlife,“ and then i moved on.

they’re not, though. that’s what reapers do. and there’s no way humans have these two races mixed up. just fucking look at them.

do they look anything alike to you??? no. they don’t. which raises the question of why, exactly, magnus said that.

now, we don’t know a lot about angels as a whole. pit (and by extension dark pit) is emphatically not the gold standard of angeldom. we can assume he looks fairly ordinary for an angel, seeing as no one has trouble identifying him as such. beyond that, though, a lot of what we know about angels comes from what pit isn’t. for starters, he can’t fly. and there’s something else, too, but i’ll get to that later.

before that, though, i’m gonna go through the various unsubstantiated comments made by people with a dubious level of authority on the subject. (incidentally, i sourced these screenshots from the wiki— much more convenient than trying to dig through youtube for every single random conversation.)

without any further ado! let’s get into it!

Angels as Messengers

Gaol: Aw, Palutena’s little messenger boy. And Magnus, it’s always a pleasure. (src)

in the specific context of overanalyzing magnus’s first line, this is an important sentence to pick out. magnus and gaol are both humans, both with presumably a fairly similar history as mercenaries up until gaol got stuffed in a suit of armor. but while magnus makes a weird comment about death, gaol calls pit a messenger.

and pit agrees with her!

Viridi: I wish I had an angel to do my bidding. It’s like having an intern.

Pit: I’m not an intern. I’m a messenger of the gods!

Viridi: Poor Pit. Don't you know that the definition of angel is "errand spirit"? (src)

this particular conversation is the most insight we get into angels as a whole, i think. viridi thinks of angels as like divine interns, there to do little tasks for gods, and palutena doesn’t exactly disagree with her. pit says they’re specifically messengers, which lines up with biblical mythology. i could see the traditional role of angels in the world of KI being exactly that, showing up to tell the humans what the gods have to say because the gods themselves are too busy being petty jerks to do it themselves.

The Angel’s Code of Conduct

Magnus: You go in fully dressed? Don't you at least want to change into a...swimming tunic or something?

Pit: Oh, no no no! The angel's code of conduct says that we must always be ready for duty.

Magnus: I guess you wouldn't be an angel if you didn't do things by the book. (src)

Pit: Hey! You know the angel's code of conduct! I need to be prepared at all times! (src)

another random little thing is the angel’s code of conduct. without a larger sample size, we can’t know if it’s a real thing or just an excuse to save on laundry, but apparently it’s against the rules to not be on call at all times. in pit’s case, the duty he has to be ready for is doing palutena’s dirty work, but it can easily mean just about anything— including, of course, being a messenger.

No Warrior

Chariot Master: But you are no warrior, angel. Tell me, why do you fight?

Pit: I fight for Lady Palutena. And I fight for the people under her protection!

Chariot Master: That's not reason enough for an angel. (src)

remember how i said there was something else weird about pit? the chariot master seems to think angels aren’t very prone to battle— or perhaps even that they’re actively opposed to it. this lines up well with the idea that they’re supposed to be messengers, peaceful go-betweens for gods and mortals. this does not line up well with pit, the adorable weapon of mass destruction.

and it also does absolutely nothing to explain the question driving the whole existence of this post.

you know what does kinda lean towards an explanation?

No Other Angels

Pit: Do all gods have their own angels, like you have me?

Palutena: No, I don't think that's necessarily the case. (src)

i said before that the Intern Pit conversation had the most illuminating information on angels. this is what i was actually referring to. on its own, it’s pretty innocuous, but it’s just as weird as the magnus line. shouldn’t pit know about other angels, seeing as he is one himself? but he doesn’t know if there are other angels.

the only angels we ever see are him and his clone. no one ever directly references the existence of other angels, they only make general statements about what angels as a whole are like— statements which clearly don’t apply to pit, meaning they’re not just extrapolating based on the one angel that definitely does exist.

the one time someone does comment on the hypothetical existence of other angels, palutena gives a vague answer to the tune of “no,” the topic is changed, and no one brings it up again.

let’s go over everything i’ve established about angels up to this point. they can fly, they’re peaceful messengers of the gods, and pit is the only one that seems to exist as of the start of KIU.

it should be pretty obvious at this point what answer i’m dancing around, if it wasn’t obvious from the start. pit is the only angel around because all the other ones are dead. the reason why magnus said what he did is that his thought process went something like this:

See an angel.

Think “Aren’t angels extinct? Is that a ghost? Am I a ghost? I sure hope not.“

Make a quip about that.

Move on with his life, because he isn’t dead and evidently neither is this guy.

i’m not gonna pretend i went into this post with the intent of any other conclusion to that mystery. anyone who’s bothered glancing over a plot summary for the original kid icarus can draw that conclusion. it’s certainly what i did, reinforced by fics by people who had the same thought!

the truth, however, is that this was all a trick to get you to read my analysis of the theoretical nature of angels as a race. now that you’re invested, i’m going to dramatically throw aside my cape and reveal my TRUE FORM: telling people that fandom consensus is wrong, and my ideas are cooler and better than everyone else’s and you should all throw roses at my feet and bow before your king.

(or just, y’know, take it as the subjective analysis that it is. whatever floats your boat.)

Hot Takes

the original kid icarus does not actually tell you about angels going extinct. here’s the wiki article with the full text of the backstory, just for convenience, so you know what i’m on about for the rest of this post.

so, the part of the story that i think gets misinterpreted is this part about palutena’s army.

Medusa led a surprise attack on Palutena's army which could barely fend off the attack. Palutena's army suffered major losses and was heavily defeated in the final battle.

specifically, i think a lot of people interpret said army as having been made up at least partly of angels. sure, in the actual game it consists entirely of centurions, but you have to take old NES games with a grain of salt. i know i don’t buy for a second that pit was part of palutena’s guard before the original game (he was just too goddamn young), there’s nothing wrong with reinterpreting things.

recall everything i established about angels already, though. this is the hot official lore, from the game everyone knows and loves. angels are messengers, and if the chariot master is to be believed, never warriors. pit is an outlier. palutena’s army consists of centurions, not angels. if medusa wiped them out, it wasn’t because they were fighting for palutena.

(and honestly, i don’t think angels are necessarily associated with palutena exclusively. sure, she’s got the wing imagery, and she’s got the one known surviving angel working for her, at least up until pittoo is born. but angels are messengers of the gods, not messengers of palutena. again, pit is an outlier.)

which all brings us to the real question of this post.

what the FUCK happened to all the other angels? why is there only pit? why does magnus act surprised to see a messenger of the gods, and make a quip about being dead, if not because angels are otherwise extinct?! WHO KILLED THEM, AND WHY?!

thus concludes the “over analyzing one-off lines“ show. see you next, uh, maybe at some point if i feel like it!

(also another thought i had but couldn’t find room to fit it in properly: the gods don’t really act like angels are all extinct, but i feel like that can be explained through the sheer scale of a god’s lifespan. if we assume they were wiped out sometime around the original kid icarus (even if not as palutena’s army) then that’s a whole twenty-five years. that’s a long time for us humans, but for a god, that might as well be last tuesday. “yeah, i know what angels are like. sure wish i could have one. too bad palutena’s got a monopoly on the one single angel that medusa didn’t manage to wreck.”)

[moony-meadow]

Going for Goldie (6)

Pt. 1 / Pt. 2 / Pt. 3 / Pt. 4 / Pt. 5

After Beelzebub departed, Mammon and I were once again alone together. The white-haired demon had resumed his place on the sofa, only now he was laid out on it with his back propped up against the armrest. This left me inside his stomach at a kind of incline. I’d taken to leaning against the back wall and was taking advantage of the surprisingly relaxing warmth the fleshy surface provided.

“I can’t believe I’m going to be stuck in here for hours,” I moaned, flopping my arm over my face dramatically. “So much for having a midnight snack.” It wasn’t uncommon for Beel and I to run into each other at the kitchen in the middle of the night. We both seemed to have a habit of craving late night treats.

“Well,” I felt Mammon’s hand plop down onto his stomach, causing a small tremor around me, “I could always swallow somethin’ for ya to eat.”

My face instantly formed into a grimace. “Don’t be disgusting, Mammon,” I chided. The idea of eating someone’s second hand food was positively repulsive. Though I knew the demon was joking, I still didn’t appreciate the crude commentary. A chuckle rumbled around me, but otherwise Mammon said nothing more.

“You know, I think since this turned out to be a lot more than a quick trip into your stomach, that you owe me Goldie privileges for at least three days,” I stated. Had I not already committed myself to helping Mammon keep his credit card from Lucifer, I might have abandoned the whole thing as soon as things got complicated. But, if I gave up now and made Mammon cough me up, then the whole thing might end up being for nothing.

A strangled noise of outrage came from Mammon. “Three days?! Ya gotta be kiddin’ me!” The stomach walls all pressed in around me slightly, I could only assume as a result of Mammon clenching his hand around his middle. “I--I’ll give ya two days, but that’s it!” he exclaimed after my lack of response displayed how serious I was about the matter.

“Fine, but you also have to take me out to dinner some night,” I declared.

Mammon unclenched his hand from around his stomach, but I could tell that he’d now tensed up all over. “Wha? You can’t be--pfft, like the Great Mammon would ever be caught goin’ out to dinner with a--with a human,'' he stammered. I had to stifle a giggle, I could just tell his face had become all blushy.

It was a pretty common occurrence that whenever I took part in some playful flirting with the Avatar of Greed, his face would heat up while he stuttered out insistences that he had no interest in humans. I knew it was just one of his defense mechanisms, so I had stopped taking offense to it a long time ago.

“It can be lunch if you prefer,” I replied, feigning ignorance.

“Huh? No--I’m only havin’ a meal with you if you’re the main course,'' Mammon finished the sentence proudly.

I rolled my eyes. “This is the last time I’m ever going to be in your stomach.” While I felt pretty sure of my own statement, there was a part of me that wondered if I really would be able to avoid being eaten again. Yesterday I would have said I would never let a demon eat me under any circumstances, and yet here I was sitting in the belly of the beast.

The pressure at the front of the stomach returned as Mammon rested both his hands on top of it. “Well ya better not end up in any other demon’s stomach,” he warned, a hint of possessiveness in his voice. “You are my human, after all.”

Being the Avatar of Greed, it wasn’t surprising to me that Mammon tended to be overprotective of his belongings. However, I never would have guessed I would be considered among those belongings. His possessiveness over me wasn’t only in regards to me being eaten, he had also expressed jealousy when his brothers tried to get a little too close to me. In a way, it was kind of endearing. Although, I always made a point to make it clear that I was not an object to be owned.

“I’m your friend,” I corrected smoothly, “and you don’t have to worry about anyone else eating me, at least not with my permission anyway.”

Mammon was silent, and for a moment I wondered if I’d made him upset in some way. But then his hand began to slowly and gently rub his stomach. I smiled softly and leaned forward to pat the outermost wall in response. The guy wasn’t the best at accepting compliments or genuine displays of affection, but he had his own little ways of showing his appreciation.

“Hey, Y/N?” Mammon spoke up, now idly trailing a finger over his stomach. “You’re not...I dunno, scared of me or nothin’, are ya?”

My eyebrows lifted in surprise. The genuine concern in the demon’s voice threw me off guard. He usually made an effort to try to convince people that he was an incredibly powerful demon that ought to be feared. And while his brothers often treated him as though he were weak, I knew better. Mammon was the second eldest of the seven Avatars, and therefore the second most powerful. However, the thing with Mammon was that the guy pretty much never flexed that power. For whatever reason, even when his little brothers smacked him around or called him names, Mammon never lashed out.

As a result of all that, it was easy for me to sometimes forget that I hung out with a potentially deadly demon on the daily. Of course, when Mammon had shrunk me I’d been reminded of that latent fear. However, I wasn’t about to tell him that. I didn’t know how he’d react to the knowledge that my natural instincts insisted I be wary of demons like him (especially when they were giant sized), but I certainly didn’t want him getting the impression that I was some scared little thing. Besides, logically I knew Mammon could (mostly) be trusted. Plus, having a pact with him meant I could stop him if he ever were to do something that really freaked me out.

“Oh please,” I dismissed. “It would take a lot more than an overgrown demon to scare me.”

“Hmmm,” Mammon hummed thoughtfully. “Maybe next time I should eat ya in my demon form, that might really give ya a fright.”

The joking tone of his voice was obvious, but I still sent a kick into the nearest wall in retaliation for the comment. “How many times do I have to tell you there won’t be a next time?” I huffed.

“Is it really so bad in there?” the demon inquired, once again prodding at the outside of his stomach.

I took a moment to assess my surroundings. It was just as pitch black as ever so I could only imagine what everything actually looked like. Surprisingly there was no foul odor, the stomach acid that was pooled at the bottom didn’t seem to have a scent to it. The temperature was a bit warmer than I’d prefer, but it was thankfully tolerable. And while the squishy stomach walls still kind of grossed me out, I had gotten pretty used to them already.

Being in the stomach itself wasn’t terrible, really it was the mere fact that I was in someone else’s stomach that I disliked so much. It was a matter of pride. Being in the Devildom, it was very important that I keep my head held high. Showing weakness would just encourage potential enemies to target me.

“It’s...well it’s not exactly the Ritz,” I responded, unsure of how exactly to explain it to Mammon. “I have no idea how I’m supposed to sleep in here either.” I couldn’t deny that it wasn’t entirely uncomfortable, but I wasn’t really sure if I’d be able to fall asleep with the knowledge that I was literally inside someone’s stomach.

As if on cue, Mammon gave a yawn that caused everything around me to tighten for a moment before loosening once again as he exhaled. “Well, let’s test it out,” he announced. That was the only warning I got before Mammon sat up and got to his feet.

With Goldie safely tucked away in a pocket, I was able to easily brace myself against the walls with both hands. I felt quite secure--that is until the floor suddenly became a wall and one of the walls I’d been holding onto suddenly became the floor. “I suppose I should have seen that coming,” I thought to myself.

After a few moments of shifting as Mammon got situated, everything around me finally settled and I was able to get myself comfortable. It wasn’t like there was a ton of room to spread out, but it was plenty of space for me to lay flat. The stomach acid had seemed to dissipate shortly after Mammon had laid down, as if his body had finally caught on that I wasn’t going to be digested so it had no business sticking around.

“Comfy?” the demon asked as he went back to gently rubbing his stomach in a circular motion.

I snorted. “About as comfortable as someone can get in a stomach.”

“Good,” Mammon replied cheerfully, unphased by my grumpy tone.

“You better not roll onto your stomach,” I warned. While I figured the action wouldn’t necessarily hurt me, I doubted it would be comfortable being squished by the entirety of the giant demon’s bodyweight.

A chuckle echoed around me. “Don’t worry, I’m not much of a stomach sleeper,” Mammon promised.

With nothing else much to say, and exhaustion beginning to heavily set in, I said, “Okay...then goodnight, I guess.”

“G’night, Y/N.”

In a matter of minutes I could tell Mammon had already fallen asleep. His breathing was slow and even and his heartrate had dropped to a resting level. Honestly, the natural ambience of his body was kind of relaxing. The up and down motion his breaths caused almost made me feel like I was on a gently floating boat. It didn’t take much longer for me to drift effortlessly into a deep sleep.

The next morning, as soon as Mammon and I woke up, I demanded he quickly get me out and unshrink me. My urgency was in large part spurred by the fact that my bladder was absolutely screaming at me after having not been emptied in so long. I didn’t even get the chance to relish my return to normal size before I darted out to the bathroom, but not before ordering Mammon never to tell another soul about the previous night’s events.

After dumping everything I’d been wearing into the wash, taking an hour and a half long shower, and then absolutely stuffing myself during breakfast, I actually felt back to normal. Of course, I wasn’t about to forget the experience of being eaten anytime soon. And something told me Mammon wouldn’t either.

[setaripendragon]

I don’t know if anyone remembers my silly little Narnia fic where the Pevensie kids all get meet-cutes with their future partners, but I’ve been working on a silly little sequel ever since, and I finally finished it. So, here’s the Pevensies finally getting together (sort of) with their partners, from the partner’s PoV, because I figured t hey deserved to get a say.

Jane had crushes before. A couple of really childish ones that were more her playing at mimicking the concept before the war forced her to grow up too fast, and then a few more serious ones after her little jaunt to Neverland as puberty dug its nasty little claws in. Peter was different.

Her Peter, not Peter Pan, even though Peter Pevensie wasn’t really her Peter at all. He was her best friend, sure, and had been since the day he’d let her flatten a couple of bullies by herself before he leapt in to de-escalate the situation, but he wasn’t hers. Not like she wanted him to be. Because not only was he kind of ridiculously handsome, and just carried himself with the sort of confidence and poise that could steal anyone’s breath, but he was also just an incredibly good person.

Which, Jane had found, was kind of rare, in boys. And maybe part of that was because Peter – her Peter, not- whatever – was a lot more grown up than the other boys her age, but she didn’t think so. He could be verygrown up when he wanted to be – which was awe-inspiring in it’s own way – but even when he was being silly and playful and ridiculously childish, he was still good. He was never horrid, never unkind, not even in jest. He never looked down on her, never held back if she instigated a bit of rough-housing, but he also never pushed her too hard, or gloated when he won, or sulked when he lost.

Jane had felt strangely alone after she got back from Neverland. She’d gained a new appreciation for the joys and wonders of childhood, but she hadn’t lost her understanding of responsibility and duty. She could get along with kids and adults, but she always felt so out of place. Like she was hiding half of herself just to fit in. That, and, she’d never been particularly lady-like to begin with, and living with the Lost Boys even for a few dayshad ruined her for any sort of delicate dignity and grace, so she didn’t really fit in with the girls her own age.

Peter – not-really-her Peter – was the same as her. Too grown-up for his age, but with a strong sense of whimsy and fantasy that would have most grown-ups giving him the same odd looks Jane got. He told the best stories, and her temper never seemed to throw him, and if he was sometimes a bit overbearing, like it didn’t even occur to him that she might, possibly, have a different opinion or a better idea, he never acted like she didn’t have a right to call him out on it. When they argued – and they did, fairly regularly, even – it was never with intent to wound, just with passion and ideas spilling out too fast and too loud and too important to hold back.

Jane was pretty sure she loved him. Her mother had warned her to be careful, not to hang all her hopes on one boy when she was still so young, and Jane tried, she really did, but she honestly couldn’t imagine a better man than Peter Pevensie.

Not that there was anything happening. Because the problem was that she and Peter had been best friends for years. Peter didn’t have quite her problems with his peers, he got on well enough with the boys in their year, but it was clear – to Jane, at least – that he was also holding a little of himself back, when he was with them. Not with her. And that was good, that was great – it was amazing, quite frankly – but it was also a little bit painful.

Because, of course, they got teased. A lot. A boy and a girl spending that much time together? Everyonejust assumed they were ‘together’. And Jane got flustered, and that made her angry, and that made her even more flustered. She yelled at the other girls who wouldn’t stop asking about her ‘boooyfriend’, and she punched the boys who wouldn’t stop making lewd commentaries, and blushed ridiculously at any mention of the notion.

Peter was phased at all. ‘Hey, Pevensie, is that your girlfriend?’ was invariably answered with the sort of stern-disappointed stare that would put any parent or teacher to shameand a bland ‘Jane is my friend’. Which, of course, Jane really did appreciate, because being Peter’s friend was just about the best thing that had happened to her since Neverland. It just… would have been nice to see even a hintthat he might possibly have even once thought of her as more than that.

Still, she’d thought, they were still young, they had plenty of time. Only they didn’t. Because then Jane found out that Peter had enlisted. He was too young, technically, but Jane wasn’t surprised that that hadn’t stopped him. He was pretty big on duty – a bit too much, sometimes, but Jane really kind of loved him for that, too – and on fighting bigotry anywhere and everywhere he found it, so it really, really wasn’t a surprise.

It wasscary, though. A little bit terrifying, because he might not come back. He might go out there to fight, and he might dieinstead. That would tear her apart no matter what, but it alsomade her think that she might not have another chance to ever tell him, to ever knowif maybe…

And if there was one thing Neverland had taught Jane, it was that sometimes the amazing things didn’t happen unless you believedthey would. Sometimes you had to jump off the damn cliff and just have faith that you would fly, instead of fall. She kind of wished she had a little pixie dust right now, though, just to give her that extra boost.

Because Peter was standing in front of her, and sometime while Jane had been fretting, they’d managed to walk all the way to the god damned train station, and he was literally minutes away from leaving. He looked kind of dashing in the uniform, but he also looked – hilariously – uncomfortable. She would have expected him to look at home in it, with how he was about duty and fighting and all, but no. He kept tugging at the sleeves and shifting his shoulders and grimacing.

And she loved the stupid face he pulled when he really just wanted to stick his tongue out in disgust but won’t because he was trying to be polite. She loved his stupid face no matter what expression he was wearing, and she needed him to know thatbefore he left. Just in case.

So she grabbed him by the front of his uniform – uncaring that she was interrupting whatever his little sister was saying, because if she cared, then she wouldn’t be able to go through with it, and then she’d neverget around to it – and told him “Don’t die.” in as stern a tone as she could manage before she yanked him down as she went up on tiptoes to press her mouth against his. Thatshould get the message across.

It wasn’t, exactly, the world’s best kiss. It wasn’t exactly even a proper kiss at all. Jane just held there for a long moment, not moving, eyes scrunched shut, her lips against his, until her courage faltered, and she dropped back down onto her heels and opened her eyes to stare up at him belligerently.

Peter looked… stunned. Which was at least better than disgusted. Or pitying. His eyes were unfocused, gazing off into nothingness somewhere a little above her head, and his jaw was slightly slack, lips just a tiny bit parted. “Oh.” He said, like it was a prelude to something, only that was it, he didn’t say anything else, just kept staring, and blinking, and staring some more.

Someone – probably Lucy – tried to pretend a snicker was actually a cough, and the noise seemed to knock Peter out of his trance. He shook himself, frowning for a brief moment before his gaze refocused on Jane, and- and everything just sort of stopped. Jane’s breath turned syrupy in her lungs and the rest of the platform just faded into fuzzy nothingness, because Peter was looking at her like he was really seeingher, like he was looking at something deeper than her damned bones, and was awed by what he saw. “Oh.” He said again, this time with a whole heap more emphasis and an entire world of meaning behind it.

It sounded infinitely better than the last one, so Jane tried for a smile. Peter grinned back, and Jane felt like she could possibly just float away without any helpful pixie dust at all. He reached up, curled a hand around the side of her neck – his hand was so warm – and leaned in. Then he hesitated, tilted his head, tried again, and finally managed to fit their mouths together. It was awkward, but also really endearing, and Jane didn’t care either way, because Peter’s – herPeter, and he really was hers– lips were on hers and moving and sliding and kissing, and her entire world narrowed down to that one sensation.

“I promise I will do my very best not to die.” Peter told her as he drew back.

“You’d better.” Jane snapped, letting go of his collar to poke him in the chest. “Because if that was all I getfrom you, Pevensie, I will drag you back from the land of the dead just to kill you myself.” Peter laughed, unfazed, and kissed her again.

---

The war was over, and Jack was finally home. Or, well, sort of home. He wouldn’t really feel like he’d made it home until he was back in America, but the Kingsley estate was close enough, the site of enough childhood misadventures to count. It was close enough, and if he was being honest with himself, he was putting off his return to the States, just a little. He could have been through the mirror and back home in a trice, without having to worry about boats or planes or travel time, but instead he was lingering about in London.

He made up excuse after excuse as to why he was staying, but the truth was, he was still hoping that he might run into Susan again. It was stupid, he knewit was stupid, she was a beautiful, clever, gentlewoman, and there was absolutely no guarantee that she’d even rememberhim, even if he did manage to find her again.

Everyone he’d asked from the pub where they’d met knew her, knew ofher, but no one knew any more about her than Jack did. Not even her last name. It was depressing, and made Jack feel like a stalker, so he’d stopped asking about her. He did not leave London, though, stupid hopeless romantic that he was.

Dwelling on it was even more stupid, he thought as he made his way back from a grocery run for Sunday lunch tomorrow that Lynn had forced him to go on to get him out of her hair for a while. He was being a pest, he should just go home, but the Underlandian in him insisted that home was where the heart was, and right now, his heart still hadn’t managed to let go of Susan.

Jack stopped dead on the sidewalk, staring, because there was no way- He was seeing things because he’d been thinking about her too much. Susan, walking with a younger girl at her side and arguing good naturedly with one of the boys a little ahead of them. “Susan?!” Jack called out before he could help himself, and jogged across the street towards her.

She looked up, eyes going wide with shock on spotting him. She looked so painfully youngin that moment, almost frightened, that Jack slowed uncertainly before he’d even reached her. Still, he pulled his most charming grin on, the one that she’d never been fooled by, but had seemed amused by, nonetheless, and swept her a gallant bow like he would if he unexpectedly ran into Lilibeth. “Jack.” Susan greeted, and that was definitely not the open, pleased greeting he’d been hoping for. She sounded reserved, wary, and worst of all, uncertain.

Jack let his smile dim a bit, and told himself it was ridiculous to feel disappointed. It wasn’t as if they had anything more than one evening of interesting conversation. But it had been the most genuineconversation Jack had managed in years, it had been so Underlandian, like a breath of fresh air in amongst the choking smog of the war.

“Su? Who’s this?” One of the boys asked, frowning at him.

“This is Sergeant Jack Manchester.” Susan introduced. “Jack, these are my brothers and sister, Peter, Edmund, and Lucy.”

Jack offered his hand to Peter, then to Edmund, and then to Lucy. “It’s a pleasure to meet you all.” He said sincerely, and then returned his attention to Susan. “I was hoping I’d run into you again, maybe get your permission to buy you a drink, this time?” He asked, and it came out a little tentative, because she still didn’t look nearly as at ease as she had when they’d first met.

“You mean you didn’task permission the first time?” Peter demanded, glowering.

Definitely a big brother, that one, Jack thought with a grin. “I asked forgiveness, instead.” He replied cheerfully.

“Oh, thatJack.” Lucy said wickedly. “I should have known when you bowed.” She added, nudging Susan, who was going ever so slightly pink. “Mum went ballisticwhen she heard Susan talking about you, you know.”

Jack blinked. Would parental disapproval account for how wary Susan seemed right now? Not that he could imagine whythey wouldn’t like him, unless they were some of the people who hated Americans. He could whip out his ‘noble’ English lineage if that would help. “I’m not that scruffy, am I?” He asked, playfully looking down at himself as if checking for dirt or mis-buttoned clothes, and then peeking back up at Susan, looking for a proper answer.

“Not at all.” Susan assured him, and therewas that bright, sharp lady he’d met last time. She was trying to hide her smile, and the appreciative look she cast him, but she wasn’t trying that hard, and it made Jack beam at her in hope that maybe he hadn’t blown this before there even wasa ‘this’.

“No, I think she was more upset about your age.” Edmund interjected, earning himself a truly fierce glare from Susan. He smiled back innocently.

Jack blinked again. “My… age?” He asked. “I’m only twenty-eight.” He pointed out, cautious and bewildered. Susan might be a little younger than him, but not by more than four or five years. He’d thought as much in the pub, particularly when she laughed, that she was maybeon the wrong side of twenty, but he doubted it. Only, he realised, looking at her now, that she stilllooked like she was maybe on the wrong side of twenty.

Susan wasn’t quite meeting his gaze, and she looked… unhappy. Lips pressed into a thin line, and expression carefully neutral in a way that Jack didn’t believe for an instant. “Ten years.” Edmund murmured thoughtfully. “That’s not quite as bad as Mum was afraid of, I think.”

Ten years. That meant that when Jack had met her, when Jack had teased and flirted and fallen just a little bit in love with her, Susan had been fifteen. It made him feel dizzy. After all, he’d started fights with the sort of creeps who would leer after his little sister that way, and Susan was the same age as Ruth.

That brought Jack’s train of thought to a screeching halt. Because trying to put Susan and Ruth next to each other and thinking of them as the same age just… didn’t seem to want to workin his mind. Susan had notbehaved like a fifteen year old in that pub. Not even a little bit. He wondered, giving Susan a slightly closer look, just how old she’d be on the other side of a mirror.

“At least I’m not as bad as Great-Uncle Tarrant.” Jack said, and then snorted, because, wow, that was an understatement, even if it was hard to gauge the exact age difference when some days he was actually younger than Great-Aunt Alice.

“How bad is Great-Uncle Tarrant?” Lucy asked curiously.

It was a bit of a struggle to do the maths. Underland didn’t really agreewith things like maths. “I’m pretty sure that, chronologically, Great-Aunt Alice is more than twenty years younger than him.” Jack answered, because that was as exact as he could get, and then he brightened as an absolutely brilliant idea occurred to him. “If you wanted, you could come meet them? We’re doing Sunday roast tomorrow, and the whole family’ll be there.” He offered to Susan, who looked just as shocked as she had when he’d called out to her earlier.

“You want me to meet your family?” Susan asked cautiously.

Jack nodded, smiling warmly. “I think they’d love you.” He told her, entirely honestly, and didn’t add the follow up that was sitting on the tip of his tongue; I think I could love you, my gentle queen.

“That sounds like a great idea.” Peter said, which startled Jack a little, since Peter didn’t seem to like him very much. The clap on the shoulder Peter then gave him was a little too rough to be called friendly. “We’ll be there.”

Ah, Jack thought, amused. Not letting his sister go off with a strange man into foreign territory alone, that’swhat that was about. “The more the merrier.” Jack assured him, and only realised just how right he’d been to say it when Peter wasn’t the only one who relaxed. Besides, it was true. If he was bringing Susan, then a good portion of the guest list from Underland probably shouldn’t come, and that meant that Lynn was going to make far too much food for just the ordinary human-like people. Three more mouths to feed would barely make a dent.

He gave them his address, promised them again that everyone would be delighted to meet them, bowed again to Susan and pressed a kiss to the back of her hand in farewell, and jogged off home with a spring in his step that hadn’t been there before.

---

Tavan was finding it increasingly hard to sit still. Lynn reached across the table and put her hand over his, and it was only then that he realised he’d been fiddling with his cuff to the point of fraying it. Sheepishly, he tucked his hands out of sight under the table, and Lynn rolled her eyes at him. “I don’t know why you’re fretting so, Tavan. Edmund’s already proven he’s not going to baulk at a bit of Underlandish magic.” She pointed out, going back to doing the household accounts.

Edmund had done a lot more than that, Tavan thought. Edmund had proven to be brilliantly sharp-witted, curious, and adaptable. Tavan didn’t think he’d ever once heard the phrase ‘but that’s not how that works’ or any of the derivatives from him, and he’d thought up as many of the more shocking things about Underland that he could, just to make sure. Edmund had figured him out in a hot second, of course, because Edmund was brilliant, but he hadn’t been upset. He just looked sneakily amused in that way he had, and asked drolly if he’d passed the test.

Tavan had kissed him.

It was only after, when Edmund had crawled into his lap and quite thoroughly marked up his neck, and rumpled his shirt, that Tavan remembered that he was in Upland, and the belated panic hit. Edmund had taken one look at his poleaxed expression, and said, in a fond murmur; “You’re fine. I don’t think bigotry is the natural order of things, either.”

Tavan had beamed at him. “Yeah, ye passed the test.”

So now, Edmund had an invitation to Underland. Which would be fine, it would be great. Except. Except Tavan had thought he’d be taking Edmund to see Iplam, to see the flower fields and show him Tavan’s study. Maybe to meet Grandma. And sure, Grandma was scary, but she was still family. He hadn’t counted on Her Majesty The White Queen insisting, all wide-eyed innocence, that Edmund “simply mustcome to Marmoreal and meet the wholefamily.”

Which meant that Edmund was going to be subject to meeting the Queen of Underland on his very first trip there. And, yes, Queen Lilibeth was like an aunt to Tavan, but that didn’t change the fact that she was the very literal heart and soul of the land, and that was intimidating no matter how sweet and gentle she, of course, was.

The doorbell rang, and Tavan jumped to his feet, nearly knocking the chair over in his haste, and rushed to get the door. Edmund was, as always, a lovely sight, and his shy, sly little smile as he stepped over the threshold was as charming as ever. He was unfailingly polite to Lynn, and if Tavan didn’t know him, he would never have been able to tell that Edmund was actually quite eager to get on with things, he was so cordial and patient.

Still, he did know better. Quite a lot better, actually, so he gave his cousin an apologetic grin and said; “So sorry tae rush off, Lynn, but we’ve an appointment we just cannae be late for.” while dragging Edmund not too subtly towards the stairs. Edmund laughed, and Lynn waved them off with a roll of her eyes, calling after them that Lilibeth would never be so crass as to be impatient.

Which was true, but still, her disappointment if you caused her to considersomething as uncharitable as impatience could be crushing. “Lilibeth?” Edmund questioned as they made for the spare room.

“Ah…” Tavan grimaced. “The White Queen.”

Edmund flinched perceptibly, and Tavan faltered a little, concerned. “Sorry. Bad memories. Why is she the WhiteQueen?” He asked cautiously.

“Tha’d be because she’s the moral center o’ Underland. White for purity, open-mindedness, compassion.” Tavan replied thoughtfully, and then looked at Edmund again, checking on him, because his reaction had been unusual, to say the least.

Edmund was nodding, though, expression the same intense curiosity he always got about all things Underlandish. “Some cultures associate white with death and winter.” He pointed out.

Tavan laughed a little. “Well, don’t tell Lily that. Not that the Queen can be anything but hospitable tae any o’ the seasons, but I think she might do something un-queen-like if you suggested she was supposed tae represent winter. She loves her roses far too much for that.”

Edmund relaxed properly at that, and just in time, too, because they’d reached the mirror, and Tavan paused to take a bracing breath before stepping through. Lilibeth, of course, hadn’t listened to a single word of Tavan’s request for a modicum of privacy, and had invited what looked like half the court to come meet Tavan Hightopp’s beloved.

Exasperated, but not surprised, Tavan turned back and stuck his head and one arm through the mirror, holding out a hand in invitation. Edmund grinned as he took Tavan’s hand and allowed him to pull him gently through the mirror. But as he passed through the rippling surface, something strange happened. Edmund Pevensie stepped into the mirror, but the man who stepped out on the other side into the White Queen’s court was no London school boy.

Edmund was almost as tall as Tavan, now, with a touch of dark stubble over his jaw and a silver circlet gleaming in his dark hair. His clothes, too, were different. They looked like they belonged here, a fine tunic with a crest in the shape of a lion on his breast, and leather breeches tucked into high boots, and a sword on his hip that his other hand fell to perfectly naturally.

Tavan quite lost his breath at the sight of him.

Edmund’s breath caught a beat later, and he looked down at himself, even as his free hand left his sword to touch cautiously at the circlet – the crown, it was definitely a crown– on his head, and then ghost down over the corner of his jaw. And then he smiled, so beatifically that Tavan’s breath caught all over again, and he actually felt a little weak-kneed when Edmund turned that smile on him and offered him his arm. He took it, of course, and subtly guided Edmund over to where Lilibeth was rising to her feet. The crowd of familiar faces parted before them like they never would have if it had just been Tavan. Or if it had been Tavan and Edmund as he’d looked on the other side of the looking glass.

Lilibeth rose to the occasion magnificently, despite the confusion, and was all smiles as she greeted Edmund. “I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of a properintroduction.” She lilted curiously.

“Your Majesty.” Edmund greeted, inclining his head respectfully, but notably notbowing. “It seems I am, once again, King Edmund the Just, of Narnia.”

---

Benji loved it when Lucy came to stay at Pemberley. Somehow, she lit the place up, and made everything that was familiar to him new and exciting again. She ran barefoot through the woods and taunted him into going skinny-dipping in the lake with her and taught him new dances under the watchful gazes of his ancestor’s portraits in the gallery.

She never stayed for long. That wasn’t her way, and Benji didn’t mind. Sometimes, he went with her when she left, whether that was travelling to far-flung places to meet new people and learn new languages, or to meetings and charities and projects closer to home, watching her throw her considerable will against any and all problems she came across, but sometimes he didn’t. And they both liked it like that.

That, Benji thought, was the thing he loved best about Lucy. Loving her was never a trap, never a cage, never a duty. She was a wild thing and she would not be tamed, and in turn, never once tried to tame him, and never asked for more than he could give.

He got a little caught up in it, caught up in herand her way of life, riding the high of being known, so clearly and effortlessly, by someone who shared his feelings and values. Which is why it came as a complete shock to him when, on the first evening of Lucy’s third stay at Pemberley, when his father leaned forwards a little and said; “I’ve been meaning to ask you, Benji, what the hold up is.”

“With what?” Benji asked.

“The engagement, of course!” Father replied, and reality crashed back onto Benji with a feeling like being submerged in ice-water. At his elbow, Lucy went suddenly still. An alarming thing, given she was usually always so full of movement.

“What engagement?” Benji asked, half genuinely bewildered, although he had a creeping sense that his family had gotten the wrong idea, because they never had understood when he tried to explain what it was about the girls he stepped out with that put him off so badly every time, and half stalling for time.

“Benji, darling, please.” Mother said, fondly exasperated. “You haven’t exactly been subtle.”

“Don’t mistake us, we’re very happy you’ve found someone!” Father added. “But your mother is right, you’ve been very obvious about how much you like Miss Pevensie.” His lips pursed with something that was half way between amusement and disapproval. “A little tooobvious, sometimes. You’d better hurry up and make an honest woman out of her, or people will begin to gossip.”

“I beg your pardon,” Lucy said, before Benji could shake the feeling of a noose tightening around his neck and find the breath to speak for himself, “but I’m afraid you’ve all got rather the wrong idea.” She said it in her High Society Voice, which was a sure sign she was sharpening her metaphorical claws. “I’ve no intent to marry. At all. Ever.”

“You’re young yet, my dear.” Mother said, looking a little concerned. “I know marriage can seem intimidating. Lord knows you and Benji are very alike in that regard, but it’s a wonderful thing to find the right person to support you through life.” She shared a loving look with Father. “You shouldn’t let something like that, with someone who understands you, pass you by just because you’re nervous.”

Lucy closed her eyes for a moment. Benji suspected she was praying for patience. “I’m not letting anything pass me by.” She said sharply, a flash of fire in her eyes as she opened them again, the smile on her lips a challenge more than any sort of expression of happiness. “I appreciate having Benji in my life very much.”

Father chuckled, while Mother went a little pink at the rather salacious tone Lucy said the last two words in. Joan snorted, derisive, drawing everyone’s attention. It was a very unkind sound, and Benji startled, because he’d thought Joan and Lucy got on. They were of a similar age, and a similar temperament, and had had many a passionate argument about one subject or another, sparring with ideas in a way that Benji was entirely unsuited for. “He’s not the only person you’ve been appreciating, though, is he?” She asked pointedly.

The whole table went still. Benji’s other two sisters turned to stare at Lucy, suddenly resembling nothing so much as hyenas staring down prey. But Lucy couldn’t be preyif she tried, and met the sudden threatening stares with a complete lack of shame. In fact, her chin kicked up a little in stubborn, fierce pride. Benji almost smiled to see it, but the flicker of admiration was quickly dampened by the thick tension in the air. “Joan?” He asked carefully. “What’s this about?”

“You didn’t tell him?” She asked of Lucy. “You swore to me you would.”

Lucy raised her eyebrows, then smiled. “Benji?” She called, and Benji hummed an acknowledgement, wary of opening his mouth again lest he be talked over. Again. “Joan walked in on me kissing Viscount Cranbrook’s son at that wedding last weekend.”

Benji blinked, startled by that reminder and a little uncomfortable at having such things discussed at the dinner table, with all his family sitting nearby. Then, he began to realise why Joan was looking so very upset. Why everyonewas looking so very upset, actually. “Yes?” He said, deliberately playing obtuse. “You already told me about that.” He paused to smile faintly. “In vivid detail.”

Joan dropped her fork. Father choked on his wine.

“Benjamin Percival Fitzwilliam Darcy!” Mother snapped, putting her own wine glass down with a very inelegant thump. “Such things are notappropriate dinner conversation!”

Benji felt veryindignant about being scolded for something that wasn’t his fault. At all. “Why am Igetting scolded? Joanie’s the one who brought it up!” He paused, feeling a little guilty, because Joan had been trying to be a good sister, to protect him, even if she had been making assumptions., and it felt a little unfair to throw her under the bus after that. So before Mother could start scolding again, he turned to his sister. “Thanks for worrying about me, though, but it really is fine. Lucy did tell me what she was about. She always does.”

There was another one of those stunned silences. Benji was really getting tired of them, and this time he couldn’t even tell what had prompted it. “You mean she’s done this before?” Joan demanded, sounding more bewildered than scandalised, which at least cleared that up.

“Yes?” Benji offered, looking around the table. Everyone else looked significantly more scandalised, and a bit insulted, whether that was on his behalf or the family’s, he couldn’t tell, and it made him feel a stranger in his own home all of a sudden. “Why are you all so damn surprised?” He blurted out. “I told youhow trapped it all makes me feel, with girls who are all thinking of marriageand one and onlyand forever. I can’t even tell what I my favourite foodis going to be on any given day, never mind who my favourite personis going to end up being next year, or the year after that!”

Joan was the only one who had the decency to look a little shame-faced. The others just looked vaguely appalled.

Except Lucy, of course. Who washis favourite person, and might even stay that way for the rest of his life. But still, the idea of trapping her in that role, of binding her to him and him to her in any way more than a simple question asked every day they happened to be together – ‘do you want?’ with no demand upon the answer being yes – was abhorrent.

Lucy just giggled, and reached out to lace their fingers together. “Why not everyperson?” She suggested cheerfully.

“I haven’t met every person.” Benji pointed out as solemnly as he was able, with his lips persistently trying to twitch up into a smile.

“Yet.” Lucy countered brightly. “And on that subject!” She declared enthusiastically, banishing the weight of the previous conversation and his family’s judgement as easily as a spring breeze scattering morning mists. “I was thinking about going to help the relief efforts in Morocco, and I thought you might like to come this time?”

[helenazbmrskai]

Hello Authortnim! I'm a new writer on tumblr and I was wondering if you have any tips for newbies like me?

I’m just a small blog but I’ll try to help you anon to the best of my abilities! I came up with a few things to share as I tried to put myself in my old-selfs shoes when I first started writing.

First and foremost I want to encourage newbie writers and those who think about becoming one to not be afraid to share your content with the world as you never know who will use your wonderful imagination as an escape from the outside world.

Just like writing makes us writers disconnect from work/school and other means of drama in our lives it helps us relax by typing out new ideas and share our work. It’s a two-way street! As a reader, you feel the same way when you discover a work that makes you forget your problems. Those who write often started with reading first.

Check out my tips under the cut!

TIP 1, FORMAT

It’s mostly networks (we’ll talk about them later!) that require you to make sure you place warnings, pairings, word count etc before the beginning of your fics but it helps the readers greatly to identify your work and see if she/he is interested in reading your story based on these things.

I noticed that new writers just copy-paste the story and click post which often results in having few likes and reblogs because the readers get intimidated by the raw text offering no insight into what they should be looking forward to. If I just think about an everyday example to point out why it’s important let me ask you what you look at first when you pick up a book in a bookstore? The summary right? You get a glimpse of the storyline the characters, the genre. You make your pick based on that.

I’ll create a list down below and explain shortly why it is important to tell these things.

Title – It’s optional, I sometimes do this and other times I just place the title of my fic on my banners. It helps the readers identify your work by name so make sure to always put a name next to your fics/series.

Genre – There’s a lot of genres you can choose from, the popular three is (angst, smut and fluff)

Angst: when a fic is angsty it means that there’s a conflict, a misunderstanding etc that will make the reader feel sad for the characters or sympathise with them. The technical definition of the word is the concept of feelings of great anxiety or dread.

Fluff: the opposite of angst, it comforts the readers and makes them coo it’s often cute scenarios or sweet little gestures, love stories etc that can be considered fluffy.

Smut: Mature content (+18) which means the fic contains sexual natured acts.

The most popular other genres are: strangers to lovers (S2L), friends to lovers (F2L), enemies to lovers E2L) and AUs like Supernatural AU, Vampire AU, Arranged Marriage AU, (AU – stands for Alternative Universe) basically anything could be an AU so don’t be afraid to play with concepts and create your own tags and AUs.

Summary – The summary is important to catch the attention of the readers, It could vary from long paragraphs to one-line summaries. Whatever floats your boat! A small #tip if you have difficulty coming up with a summary: make it a sneak peek. Choose a few lines from any part of your fic and let that speak for you!

Warnings – If your writing contains triggering or sexual content make sure you let your readers know! It’s very important. The more detailed description the better. It’s common just to state ’smut’ and leave it at that but I think it’s important to let the audience know what they should expect in that scene, what kind of kink is involved, if it’s protected or unprotected sex, even if it’s vanilla. Use. Your. Tags.

Word Count – This is just as important as the rest. It makes a huge difference to know if it’s 1k or 30k+. If you use word documents for your writing at the bottom you could always check the word count so it’s not taking you too much time to figure it out.

Masterlist – It’s optional as well. If you have a masterlist then link it before your fic and after your formatting so the reader can check out other stories that you’ve written. (Masterlist is a list of your fics that’s normally broken down to members of the band that you’re writing for, you can check out mine for an example if you’re confused.)

Credit – Never forget to credit who helped you! If you requested a banner make sure to name and link where it’s from. If you’re not confident in your banner making skills you can always opt for a moodboard, it’s easy to make but gives a little character to your post. (I use this online editor for my moodboards.)

Author Note – It could be anything you would like to add. I personally like to read the authors thoughts before the fic, it’s often funny that puts a smile on my face. You can talk about anything story related or not but make sure to not write too too much because that would result in the readers skip it if you make it too long. It’s an optional point as well.

TIP 2, READ MORE

It’s another pet peeve that I’m sure a lot of us have here. It’s tiring to scroll through 3k+ words so use your read mores if it’s longer than 500-800 words! I use ’read more’ when my word count is over 1k. Believe me, if someone is interested in your story she/he will click that read more. Next, let’s talk about the placement.

It’s a common place for read more to be at the end of your formatting. If you use a browser to post a fic then all you have to do is click on the last option that appears as soon as you click into the white space to start your text post.

#tip If you want to use read more while you make a post on your mobile all you have to do is: type :readmore: in a new paragraph and then click enter it should appear right after!

TIP 3, NETWORKS

Let’s talk about networks now! They are dedicated to writers and other content creators to get more recognised by sharing their content. There are ones with open tags but most networks are sharing the content of their members. To become a member you need to fill out applications but make sure to check if they’re looking for new members or not at the moment!

There are networks dedicated to different groups (or members) so apply for those that you’re writing for. There are multi networks too that reblog content from different bands as well.

After you’re accepted all you have to do is use their tags and wait for them to reblog your fic, #tip use the first three tags for networks because it’s more likely that they see your post and reblog it sooner!

TIP 4, FOLLOWERS

It takes time to gather your followers, all you need to do is share your content and cherish those who like it.

Don’t worry about how many likes or reblogs are on your posts. Unfortunately, there are more silent readers on Tumblr than those who reblog and leave nice comments but there will be always readers who share how much they like your stories. So don’t get discouraged things will come to you eventually.

TIP 5, ASKS

It’s a form when your readers can engage with you. What I want to say in this paragraph is that there will be nice and not so nice comments but hopefully, all nice people will come to you. Don’t feel obligated to reply to everyone, reply to those that you’re comfortable with and share what you’re comfortable with.

Don’t share personal information like your address or your full name. The internet can be scary so always be cautious!

This is what I could come up with from the top of my head so if you have (or anyone else) more questions feel free to send them to me and I’ll try my best to answer them and help, my ask box is always open! I might make more posts like this if you’re interested.

[shortprince-cos]

Patton Angst Fic Because I Can't Stop

Summary: Patton decides to run...a little experiment.

Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort.

Ship: Platonic or Romantic LAMP, your choice.

Warnings: Suicidal thoughts, exhaustion, crying, not eating, breaking down a door, loneliness. Tell me if I need to add anything else!

~~~~~

Patton was tired.

That was more of an understatement. He woke up at 6:00 every morning to make breakfast for all of the sides. Most of them ate a little differently, so it required a lot of work to get all of the meals perfect.

Everyone took their meals back to their rooms to eat. An occasional thanks was given, but most meals were lonely, with only Patton eating at the dinner table.

Patton didn't mind.

After eating breakfast, Patton would clean the house. He did this every day. He probably didn't need to clean the whole house every day, but he wanted to. He wanted it to be perfect.

He would take a 'break' at noon, just in time for lunch. Making all the sides different lunches every day took a lot of work, but it was worth his family being happy.

...They never thanked him. Or sat with him during lunch.

But they appreciated him! They just didn't show it very often!

Patton didn't mind.

Believe it or not, Patton did take breaks. He went to check on everyone during the day, just wondering if they needed anything. Sometimes they would ask for water, or some kind of help, but more often than not, they dismissed Patton, saying they were 'too busy for distractions'.

Patton didn't mind.

He returned to cleaning after lunch. That usually lasted until 5:00. Patton would spend at least an hour working on the perfect dinner, one that everyone would enjoy! Dinner was usually the time when the whole family could get together and just talk about their day, or whatever they wanted really! It was when everyone was done with their work, and they could just spend time together!

...More recently, no one even came to get food. Patton wasted an hour making perfect meals, only to eat a fraction, and have to throw the rest away when it goes bad.

Patton...did mind. But he always acted like he didn't.

Patton stressed cleaned and cooked every day. No one knew that it was because of stress, but they never talked to him anyway, so it wasn't their fault.

Sometimes things got too overwhelming. The amount of work he had to do for Thomas, even though it was very little, it weighed heavily on him. Trying to fix everyone else's problems, but ignoring his own.

It was better to ignore those problems anyway, it's not like he had anyone to help him with them. Not like he helped the others.

Constantly worrying about the right decisions. Not just his decisions, everyone else's too. All of these things were torture, but they were worth it.

Were they worth it? No one thanked him. They barely even talked to him. It almost seemed like they were ignoring him after the last video. They only talked if they needed something, or they were in a video. Movie nights were long forgotten, the last one probably before the courtroom. After that, everyone was on edge, and started spending more time alone.

Patton lay in his bed, thinking about all of this. He rarely even fell asleep in his bed, most of his sleep was on the couch, when he couldn't keep his eyes open at 3:00 in the morning. He only went to his bed if he needed to think, and boy was he thinking.

'Was any of this worth it? They must acknowledge some of the things I do. Right?'

Patton was finally breaking down from the pressure. Actually realizing what was happening to his family- to him.

'Maybe I should test it. If they notice, I'll come right back, no harm done. If they don't notice...maybe I wouldn't be in the way anymore.'

Patton decided to run an experiment. He would stay in his room until someone noticed he wasn't there. He was sick and tired of being left alone, so he'll finally see if they actually cared or not.

Hopefully they would notice immediately. If they didn't notice in the first week...Patton wasn't sure if he would be around for the second.

---

Logan woke up at 8:00am precisely, as he always does. He quickly got up, showered, got dressed, brushed his teeth and hair, and tied his tie before going downstairs.

Logan didn't see any breakfast today, or any Patton for that matter. It was...odd, but Logan didn't think too much of it.

'He must have taken a day off. Usually he would tell us, but he must have forgotten.' Logan thought. Oh well, that meant Logan wouldn't have many distractions today.

Logan started brewing some coffee. Should he have breakfast? Of course it's 'The most important meal of the day!' as Patton would say. Was Logan going to have it? No. He usually wasn't hungry in the morning anyway, and he only ate it for Patton.

"Coffee instead of Crofter's? Who are you, and what have you done with Logan?" Logan turned to see Virgil coming down the stairs in his pajamas with his hoodie on top. His sarcastic joke making Logan chuckle a bit.

"Well, Patton left me with an option today." Logan explained while pouring his coffee into a mug that said '#1 Teacher!'.

"Patton isn't making us eat breakfast today? We can have whatever?" Virgil's face widened with a bit of surprise, but he looked more excited than anything.

"It seems he has taken a day off. Coffee?" Logan offered Virgil his mug, Virgil quickly accepted and drank it black.

"Patton took a day off? I'm shocked. Like, actually shocked. That never happens."

"I am 'shook' as well."

"Never say that again."

"Did I say it wrong? Is that not the meaning?"

"No, it was right, but it was super embarrassing and cringy. I have no idea why we taught you these things, it was obviously a mistake."

---

Logan's day went by normally- well almost. Patton never knocked on his door, and Logan never heard the vacuum running. He...missed it? He had no idea if that statement was correct, but he knew that working was a little harder without the white noise of the vacuum running from downstairs.

Why Patton vacuumed the entire house every day was a mystery to Logan. He certainly didn't need to. But the noise in the background was always comforting for some reason.

Logan didn't take any breaks today. He forgot to eat lunch, and by the time he was done with his work, it was 9:48pm. Oops. Guess he should probably eat something.

Logan made his way downstairs, surprised when Patton wasn't there. Logan also didn't understand why Patton slept on the couch most of the time, but whatever figuratively floats his boat, Logan supposed. It was odd not seeing him all day though.

Logan only ate Crofter's on some toast for dinner before going back upstairs at 10:13pm to go to bed.

He got to his bedroom door and hesitated. He glanced to Patton's door, debating something in his mind.

'Should I see if he's alright?' Logan thought. 'No, I'm just overreacting. All he did was take a day off, there's no need to worry.'

No need to worry.

---

It was two days later, and Virgil was worrying a bit. He hadn't seen Patton for awhile, and while he was happy he wasn't being helicopter-parented, he couldn't help but wonder where he was.

Despite being upset with him for accepting Jan-Deceit, Virgil wanted to just break into his room and find out what was happening, but as always, his anxiety stopped him.

"Logan?" He decided to ask Logan if he was being irrational or not.

"Yes Virgil?" Logan responded, not looking up from his book or moving from his spot on the couch.

"It may be just me, but, I'm worried about Patton." That got Logan's attention.

"Well, it certainly isn't just you. I have to admit I am a bit troubled for him as well. However, it has only been three days, I don't think we should jump to any conclusions. Besides, if Patton wanted to see us, he would. He might just want some time alone right now, especially after the last video we did." Logan explained. This calmed Virgil down a bit.

"Right." Virgil cringed, remembering the events of the episode he missed. "Ok, thanks Logan."

"No problem, Virgil." Logan smiled at Virgil before returning to his book.

Virgil sighed and plopped down next to Logan on the couch. He didn't really want to go back to his anxiety-inducing room after he just calmed down.

The two sat in silence the rest of the day.

---

Roman had just gotten back from his adventure in the imagination. He had been gone since...the video, but now he was ready to face everyone again! Saving an imaginary town full of imaginary people sure does boost your confidence!

But it was time to actually confront his problems. Like Patton and De-Janus. It still felt weird to say his actual name.

Roman emerged from his room for the first time in at least a week. The halls were empty. That's not normal. But were any of them 'normal' after the newest video? Not really.

Roman cautiously made his way down the steps to find Logan sitting at the table, and Virgil sitting on top of the couch.

They both kind of looked awful. Logan had bags under his unconcentrated eyes, his mind clearly wandering from his book while he fidgeted with his necktie.

Virgil...looked like Virgil, except he looked really tense and his brows were furrowed with worry.

"Well, I'd certainly hoped for a more enthusiastic response to my late arrival." Roman called attention to himself at the bottom of the stairs.

"Roman!" Virgil immediately shot up from the couch and ran over to hug Roman, which was...strange.

"Roman, where have you been?! You've been gone for three weeks!" Logan scolded while walking over to Virgil and Roman.

"Jeez, L. I just got back and I'm already getting yelled at?" Roman complained. "Wait, three weeks? No, that- that can't be right. I've only been gone a couple days."

"Well, clearly your calculations are wrong."

Virgil suddenly pulled away from Roman, choosing to shove him instead.

"Hey- what-?!"

"Do you have any idea how worried I was about you and Patton?! You've been gone for so long, I thought something had happened, but Logan told me not to worry, but then I started worrying more because what if we should have been worried and something did happen to you and we didn't know because we weren't worr-"

"Virgil!" Roman grabbed Virgil's shoulders to get his attention. "Calm down time, I'm fine. But, why are you worried about Patton? Where is he?"

"We assume he's in his room, but we haven't seen him for about seven days, three hours, fifteen minutes, and thirty-three seconds." Logan explained casually.

"And you haven't checked on him, why?"

"Logan says he's probably just taken the week off, or something..." Virgil quietly mumbled.

"Ok...that is very weird though. I mean, has Patton ever taken time off? Like, since we've known him?" Roman questioned Logan.

"Well, no. But I suspect Deceit has told him that he should take some time off, given the point of the last episode." Logan explained while Roman cringed at the thought of the last time he saw Patton.

Virgil groaned as well.

"Something wrong, Roman? Virgil?"

"Nothing..." The two quietly moaned in unison.

"Very well, if you two are so bothered by Patton's absence, I suppose we could go check on him." Logan offered while gesturing upstairs.

"Logan, you've been fidgeting with your tie throughout this entire conversation, and you expect us to believe you aren't worried?" Virgil accused while Logan very clearly stopped toying with his necktie.

Logan cleared his throat, his face turning slightly pinker. "Well- uh- lets just go."

And so the three of them journeyed up to Patton's light blue door, hoping to find their friend perfectly fine.

"Should we knock?" Virgil asked.

"Yes, if he doesn't respond, then we'll go in." Logan said in his 'I don't have feelings, but I'll comfort you anyway' voice.

Roman knocked three times and awaited an answer.

Nothing.

Roman knocked louder this time.

Nothing.

"Patton?" Roman tried opening the door, but alas, it's locked.

"Should we-" Virgil started before Roman kicked the door in surprisingly fast.

"ROMAN, YOU SHOULD HAVE WARNED ME FIRST!" Virgil exclaimed before looking into Patton's room.

"Empty." Logan stated the obvious.

Everyone slowly walked into the lifeless room.

"Wait." Virgil said quietly.

Well, almost lifeless.

Virgil slowly walked over to Patton's bed, which now everyone could see had a small figure hiding under the covers.

"Patton?" Virgil whispers as he kneels down next to the bed.

Suddenly a little Patton face comes out from under the comforter. "Yeah?" He asks in a small, meek voice.

"We were worried about you, are you alright?" Logan questioned as he walked over to where Patton was on the bed.

"Oh, so now you're worried." Patton replied with an attitude that he never had before.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Virgil tried his best to not let anger seep through his voice.

"Nothing, apparently." Patton buried himself in the blanket again, leaving the other sides confused.

"Yikes, he really has been spending too much time with Janus." Roman stated, which made something in Patton snap.

Patton immediately pulled the covers off and sat up angrily. "No! No, I haven't, because he's afraid you guys will hate him even more if he talks to me! And none of you guys ever come out of your rooms anymore because you're all mad at me! No one ever even acknowledges me anymore! I'm just so-so a-alone!" At this point Patton had hot tears rolling down his face while he gasped for more air.

"I-I know you guys need t-time, but...I can't do it anymore, I just c-can't."

"P-Patton-" Virgil started before Patton started laughing- wait, laughing?

"Its funny, right? How-how I can take all the time in the world to work through my issues, but the moment you guys need time..." Patton slumped in exhaustion. "God, I'm so selfish. I can't even last two weeks without you guys."

"Maybe, but we shouldn't have ignored you. We should have talked about it instead of ignoring it." Virgil said. "Instead of ignoring you."

"N-No. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm j-just overreacting, is all." Patton wiped away his tears even though new ones kept forming. "I-I'm fine."

"You're clearly not fine, Patton." Logan put his hands on Patton's. "You've apparently been sulking in your room all week. When did you even intend on coming out?"

"But Logan," Patton's face lit up. Oh no. "We came out years ago!"

Three different groans rang out in the bedroom.

"Patton, you know very well what I meant." Patton's face fell quicker than it rose.

"I-I know...Roman, when did you get back?"

Roman's face got a little happier. "Just today-"

"Patton." Logan interrupted, squeezing Patton's hand a little more. "You didn't answer my question."

Patton looked between the three of them before looking towards the floor and mumbling something indecipherable.

"Uh- what was that, Pat?" Virgil asked cautiously.

Patton quickly looked back up to meet Virgil's eyes. "I wasn't going to!" He exclaimed.

Everyone's faces were quickly filled with shock and disbelief.

Roman moved to sit next to Patton as well. "W-What? You were just going to stay in your room forever?" Patton only shook his head. "Then, what-?"

"No." Virgil suddenly interrupted, the shock never leaving his face. "Patton, tell me you weren't going to-" Virgil raised his hand to cover his mouth.

"Spit it out, Virge!" Roman exclaimed.

"It seems Patton was going to d-" Logan stopped in disbelief. "excuse me- duck out. R-Right?"

Roman gasped. "Patton, that's not true is it? It can't be true."

Patton started sobbing. Well, there was his answer.

Virgil shot up from where he was kneeling and quickly pounced on Patton, giving him a giant hug that was probably long overdue.

Logan and Roman looked at each other before joining the hug pile too.

Eventually they had to stop, considering Patton had to breathe sometime, so they all climbed off of each other.

Patton still had a few tears streaming down his face. "I'm-I'm sor-"

"Don't you dare apologize for feeling like that. Just don't." Virgil scolded quickly.

"Well, then you guys can't apologize either!" Patton claimed.

"Yes we can!" All three said in unison, which made Patton giggle a bit.

"Well, that's not fair." Patton complained with a small smile on his face.

"Alright, alright." Logan attracted everyone's attention. "Now that we have that sorted, maybe we should relax and try to de-stress for awhile, hm?"

"Sounds super!" Roman exclaimed before picking up a giggling Patton in a bridal style hold.

As Logan and Virgil exited the room, Roman leaned down and whispered to Patton.

"I'm sorry about the video. I shouldn't have overreacted like that. I know you're trying your best."

"Well, I'm sorry too-"

"Ah bupbupbup!" Roman booped Patton's nose playfully. "I thought we said you couldn't apologize anymore today!"

Patton only giggled more in response.

Soon enough all four of them were on the couch watching an array of Disney movies, the earlier events drifting from their minds.

~~~~~

Y'all wanted a stupid title, so there ya go! This fic was super self indulgent, so that's why it is the way it is.

If you ever feel alone or like life isn't worth it anymore, I highly suggest getting some help from a professional. Please don't shut yourself in away from people who care about you, because that will only make things worse. Remember, if you're gone, there's always someone who will miss you, even if it doesn't feel like there is.

General Taglist: @decadentscissorsapricotdeputy @resident-trash-goblin @thefingergunsgirl @theantisocialghost @foreverfangirlalways @emo--nightmaree @moxy--sanders101 @quinnthequeer @gattonero17 @trashno0dle @tranquil-space-ninja @wellhellothere09 @lugooble @sander-crossing @disney-princess-patton @obsessedalli @hi-its-tutty Ask if you would like to be added or removed!

Reblogs are appreciated! 💖

[alicejohnson]

This book is one of the most recommended books on Tiktok so I had to pick it up (also, I love Greek mythology so it made total sense for me to love this and LET ME TELL YOU, I did love it)

Stars: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

The review in itself is pretty much spoiler-free, but thoughts and interactions with this post might not be.

What is it about: A retelling of The Illiad from Patroclus point of view.

Warnings?: Not really, but it is LGBTQ+ (if that's a warning I don't trust you, but guess I have to specify it). There are talks about death, killing, there's blood, human suffering, but nothing too explicit.

Plot: The pacing can be quite slow and it is definitely driven by characters, not plot. Most of the events of the Troyan War are just narrated as if it was a bedtime story with huge time skips. It is not very dialogue-heavy, very descriptive so it did give me the "ok, I understand his hair is soft, let's move on" sometimes. The writing is beautiful, very poetic, romantic, idealistic. Everything is basically romanticized to the extreme, even simple things such as figs. Also, the author did her research amazingly, to be honest. It was marvelous.

Side note: Because this is an unreliable narrator, you just get to see one side of the story. I loved it, but I know that's not for everyone.

Characters: Patroclus is as pure as he can be, and he grows and learns while he takes us through his own rollercoaster of emotions. Achilles for me was a little bit one-dimensional, but I'm guessing that's the whole point so it's not as noticeable. The rest of the characters are pretty witty and the female love interest is not annoying or antagonized as they usually are in LGBTQ+ books so that was refreshing.

I do recommend it, it is one of the purest versions of love I've ever read, but it is not a traditional romance. You won't read spicy scenes or lots of interactions between the main characters. It's more of the author telling you something is happening rather than showing you.

Thoughts: This showed me a type of love I've never seen before. Patroclus was completely in love with the idea of Achilles to the point of letting him commit genocide. I do believe Achilles loved him back, but not more than his honor which is heart-shattering in my opinion.

Patroclus had a wonderful character development arc, so much so that I dare to say the first half is a "coming of age/slice of life" story. He was insecure, timid, and tragically thought he was nothing until he didn't. He was well-respected, good in battle, a wonderful "doctor", he had balls of steel when it came to protecting those he loved, and he ran into battle for a greek demigod.

Ironically, I would say Patroclus was the one who should've become a God, but his Achilles heel was his love for that very same man. But, isn't that wonderful? To blindly love someone so much you wouldn't even dare to judge their decisions. If something was important for Achilles, Patroclus took it to heart (except for Briseis but that's something else).

Can we ever, as humans in modern society, love like that again? With that kind of devotion, admiration, simply wholeheartedly? I'm guessing we can't. There's so much going on in the world that our views on traditional romantical love have changed. We expect reciprocity, we expect reactions, love languages, gifts, we expect and expect but we never just love because we are scared of letting go. That's why we are so enamored with monogamy (which I'm not saying is wrong, of course, it isn't, whatever floats your boat) but I personally do feel like I can't trust someone with my everything if I'm not the only one, and Patroclus showed us that's not the case.

Achilles could marry or fuck whoever he wanted because he knew he loved him. Patroclus could have had children with Briseis, but he didn't. They showed me the power of just loving idealistically, romantically, passionately, and I love them for it.

“I will never leave him. It will be this, always, for as long as he will let me.”

[possiamo-andare]

Midsummer pt.4: JJ Maybank

JJ x Reader

(gif by @rudypankows )

MASTERLIST

word count: 5.4k

a/n: hello friends! I know this took forever but I didnt want to post anything in light of what is going on in the world right now concerning the Black Lives Matter movement. Even now, as I write this, it feels wrong. I think it's because I want to make sure that no one goes back to normal because George Floyd is not the only victim of police brutality. Please use your voice. Stand up for what's right. Sign petitions. Go to rallies. Donate money if you have the means. I have saved some money over the past weeks to donate and it would help me greatly if you could comment below and tell me a good charity I can donate to that supports black lives. Obviously, I will be donating to the Black Lives Matter movement but any other charities that you feel that are just as important, please comment below. No justice, no peace!

~

When you were a child, there was a time where you read old Nancy Drew books. They provided you with an escape from reality; a means for you to daydream. Your parents were so consumed with their jobs and getting you the proper schooling, you rarely had time to be a child. The Nancy Drew series provided that way out. Although you enjoyed all the books equally, there was one book from the series that you particularly read over and over again. It was called Nancy Drew and the Legend of the Lost Gold. It was a short novel and, as one would guess, it's about Nancy and her friends discovering lost gold during their vacation on a coastline.

You loved this book for many reasons. One of the reasons was because the idea of finding long lost gold, was just about the most exciting thing for an eight year old child. Secondly, it made you realize how desperate people were to become rich. You had lived comfortably your entire life and to read in a book that people would do anything for a chance at stolen gold, was a real shock to you.

Now, as John B. drove back to the chateau, you realized that you're not shocked anymore. Someone was willing to shoot you and your friends just to get some of the gold. If they knew where the rest had been, you didn't want to think about all the other things they were willing to do. This was a scary thought and you knew now that not only did you need to protect that gold, you needed to protect your new and old friends who were chasing after the gold. Your mind instantly went to JJ, who sat beside you in John B.'s wagon. He was so hell bent on getting revenge but you had calmly talked him out of it. The last thing you wanted was a bullseye on JJ's head because he stole money from a drug dealer.

Finally, John B. parked near the chateau. You had never been here but John B. said you all needed a place to lay low until they could come up with a better plan. They obviously couldn't go back to the only cash for gold shop in OBX and they couldn't go to the police, because how would you explain where you got the gold? You agreed with John B. You all needed to take a moment to breathe and sort everything out. You believed in the people around you, and you believed you all would figure something out eventually.

"So, what're we gonna do?" Kiara said, plopping herself down in a chair. Pope sat across from her as John B. and Sarah sat beside each other.

"I have no idea." Pope sighed, rubbing his temples. You didn't point it out but you could see his hands were still shaking.

You sat down on the last remaining seat and looked to JJ who was standing beside you, arms crossed over his chest. You motioned to the rows of chairs behind him. "Wanna sit?"

JJ vigorously shook his head, still fuming. You didn't want to argue with him, especially after everything you had been through, so you let it go for now.

"Well, if we can't sell it, maybe we can put it in a security box in the bank?" Pope suggested, looking to John B.

John B. nodded. "We could. My main focus is on how we're gonna get the rest of the gold."

You all sighed. JJ had told you that there was much more; $400 million worth of gold down the well still. John B. had only taken a handful. This means that they had to somehow get pounds and pounds of gold up from a well and into John B.'s wagon to take it to a bank. As if that wasn't suspicious already. This all seemed impossible. You realized that maybe finding the gold was the easy part, everything after was the hard part.

"That's gonna cost money though." JJ started, his jaw set. You could tell he was still pissed about everything that had happened today and you didn't blame him. "We need supplies, like rope and wire and tools and a place where we can load the gold onto."

You nodded along to what JJ was saying. "I can look in my garage again but I doubt I have half of the things we all are looking for."

You looked to Sarah, who had been quiet this entire time. When you made eye contact, she finally cleared her voice to speak. "We could look for some supplies and buy the rest we need. Pope, I'm sure your dad has some stuff. Kiara too. And Y/N, your dad must have something in his garage. The rest we can buy with the money we have."

Everyone nodded along, silently thanking Sarah for her optimism. No one spoke for a moment, but then John B. reached for Sarah's hand and grabbed it. "We can do this."

You smiled as you watched Sarah squeeze John B.'s hand. You could tell how in love they were. It made you want to cry. You were so happy for her. You smiled up at JJ, who finally was starting to relax a little. He smiled back at you, his elbow leaning against your chair.

"So, we'll grab the supplies we can get, meet at my place tomorrow morning and go back to the well." JJ planned, a smile on his face.

It didn't last long. Before JJ had any real time to be happy, John B. interrupted that. "I can't tomorrow morning. Ward is taking me out on his boat."

Everyone looked to John B., frowns on everyone's face. JJ, now angry again, was the first one to speak up. "Seriously dude?"

"Yeah," Pope agreed with JJ. "It's $400 million in gold. Can't you bail?"

John B. shook his head. "No. Ward took me in when child services wanted to take me away from OBX. I owe him." John B. looked to Sarah, smiling lightly at her. She smiled back, a glow you had never seen before in her eyes.

No one seemed to want to argue anymore, understanding where John B. was coming from. Everyone but JJ, who was now mad again.

"Seriously? This is my only way out and you can't make up an excuse?" JJ placed back and forth, his face going red. "If you won't get the money, then I will."

You knew exactly what he meant. He was going to go back to the drug dealers house and steal the money. Somehow JJ knew that he kept over $25,000 in cash in his house and he was determined to find it. Even though you had talked him out of it once, you weren't sure if you could do it again.

"JJ, no." You pleaded, getting out of your seat and following him. He was practically out the door when you stopped him. You grabbed onto his shoulder and forced him to turn to you.

At first he couldn't look into your eyes. "Y/N..."

"Please don't do this. You're gonna get hurt." You pleaded, grabbing onto his hands.

JJ pulled away from you, an ashamed look on his face. "You don't understand. Without this gold, I'm screwed. It's my only way out of this hell hole. I need that gold."

You nodded, understanding his reasoning but still holding onto the fact that it was incredibly dangerous. "Please, we can find another way."

For a moment, it almost seemed as if JJ was going to listen to you but the moment was over before you could take it in. Then, JJ became furious again and stormed off, leaving you with an enormous weight on your chest. You were scared for him. JJ was not being level headed, which meant he was going to make rash decisions. Rash decisions rarely ever were successful and JJ's plan, whatever it was, was not going to be successful either.

As you made your way back to the table everyone was sitting at, Sarah stood up to comfort you. You accepted her hug willingly. You wanted to cry out of frustration but you knew you couldn't now. You needed to focus. Maybe if you all came up with a good plan, JJ wouldn't have to do anything stupid.

Everyone stayed silent as Sarah comforted you. You knew they were all weary of what they should say. JJ was putting himself in a terrible situation and if he didn't stop, he would not end up in a good place. You knew this but you also knew it was JJ's decision at the end of the day.

Finally, Kiara spoke. "Do you think he's gonna go back to his dad?" She's not looking at anyone but you can still hear the sadness in her voice.

The entirety of OBX knew JJ's dad as a gambling drunk who was in no position to raise a son. You were honestly surprised with how good JJ turned out considering he had a terrible father. There was also a rumour floating around OBX that JJ's father hit him. You didn't want to believe it but you'd be lying if you said that when you saw JJ's bruises on his face, your first thought wasn't that it was from his father. You never pressured JJ into talking about it because you didn't want him to shut you out or feel uncomfortable but you hoped one day, he would tell you if there was something going on at home.

Pope answered Kiara. "I don't think JJ ever wants to go home. Not when his dad is drunk at least."

Your stomach dropped. Pope confirmed your suspicions. This meant that the bruises on his face that you saw during the Midsummer party were in fact from his father and not from a fight he instigated. You felt bad for thinking it had been his fault. You had let the rumours about how terrible JJ was ruin your perception of him. You promised yourself that from now on, that would never happen.

"So, what do we do now?" You asked, sitting back down.

Everyone looked at you but didn't speak. Finally, John B. did. "We're gonna get that gold."

You all made a plan. Kiara was going to go to her dad's restaurant and see if there were any tools there, while Pope went to his dad's shop and looked for rope and supplies. Sarah and you would buy the rest of the supplies, like helmets and flashlights and everyone would meet at John B.'s house. Kiara would be parked in his backyard. You all would meet tomorrow night instead of the morning because John B. promised to go on Ward's boat.Once the gold was extracted, then you all would figure out a way to keep it safe from greedy people in OBX.

Once everything was planned, you all went your separate ways. It took awhile for you all to separate from each other but you eventually did. The tension lingered in the air; telling you all that this might be the last peaceful time any of you had for a while. You didn’t want to believe this but that gut feeling never left you. Even as you walked back to your neighbourhood, with Sarah and John B. following you, you couldn’t shake this gut feeling that something terrible was going to happen.

“You ok Y/N?” John B. asked, watching as you silently walked beside him and Sarah. John B. and Sarah were having their own conversation and you didn’t seem to be contributing. This was very unusual because, even though John B. only knew you for a moment, he recognized that you were a very chatty girl.

You looked up at John B., forcing a smile. “Yeah,” you sighed deeply, trying to come up with an answer. “Just worried about JJ.” This technically wasn’t a lie. JJ had left you hours ago and in those hours, your mind was leaping to conclusions. You hoped for the best and thought maybe he turned around last minute and decided to not steal anything. But you knew JJ better than you knew yourself and you knew what he was capable of.

John B. and Sarah both nodded but only John B. spoke again. “Me too. When JJ gets into these mindsets though, it’s hard to convince him otherwise. He’s stubborn like that.”

Sarah scoffed, a playful look on her face. “Sounds like someone I know.” You know she’s talking about you and you can’t help but smile. You knew you were exactly the same.

You didn’t bother to reply to Sarah, knowing she was right. Instead, you stayed silent as John B. continued to go into detail about how excited he was to spend some quality alone time with Ward. You only smiled and nodded along with what he was saying, your mind elsewhere. More specifically, your mind was focused on JJ. You wondered where he was and with who. If he was safe, or if the drug dealer had caught up to him. You wished he was less stubborn, if he only listened to you. It was too late now. The only thing you could do was wait and hope he was alright.

Once you got to the fork in the road, you finally spoke up. “I take a right here.”

John B. and Sarah nodded, finally letting go of each other to hug you goodbye. First was Sarah. She hugged you way too tightly and you couldn’t help but giggle. She let you go instantly and apologized. Then, John B. hugged you briefly and thanked you numerous times. Of course, you told it was no problem but you were lying to yourself if you didn’t think, even for a second, that maybe you regretted getting into all this trouble. It had only been a day but you already had a gun pointed at you by a drug dealer. You didn’t voice any of your regret to John B. or Sarah. You didn’t want to make them feel bad. This is why you needed JJ. You could tell him this type of stuff without him judging you. Because he knew. He understood you. He saw you.

Your house had a long ass driveway. Sometimes, if you walked slow enough, it would take you five or so minutes to get to the front door. You never made it the full way though. Halfway to the front door, you remembered you had lost your key and were now locked out of your house. Tonight was date night for your parents and you knew they weren’t home at this time and probably wouldn't be home for a while. Instead, you made your way to your backyard, where your dad kept a spare key underneath a pot. Finding the pot wasn’t as easy as you thought. There were almost ten pots in your backyard since your dad took up gardening so you had to individually check under each pot before you found the pot where the key was being held. Finally, you unlocked the door with a sigh. You were gonna have your key sewn into your skin so you’d never forget it ever again.

Before you could internally complain any more, you were caught off guard by a hand wrapping around your mouth. You had only made it one foot in the door before someone came up behind you, putting a hand over your mouth and pushed you all the way inside. You tried to scream for help but it was no use, this person was clasping their hand over your mouth too roughly. Once they had closed the door behind you, you took the opportunity to get the upper hand and you kicked them in the shin with your heel as hard as you could. You then grabbed their hand covering your mouth and twisted it. The stranger let out a yelp and they fell to their knees. Finally, you turned around to see the perpetrator.

“Jesus woman!” JJ yelled, trying to release his hand from your grasp. It was no use. You had it twisted so the more he struggled, the more it hurt.

Once you recognized JJ, you instantly gripped harder, only causing him to yell out again in pain. “What the fuck JJ.”

JJ scoffed through the pain searing through his wrist. “You broke my wrist!”

This time you scoffed, letting go of his wrist finally. JJ got up quickly, a pout on his face. “I didn’t break it you idiot. Don’t sneak up on me like that next time.”

JJ rolled his eyes. “Sorry, I didn’t know you were a fucking ninja.”

You turned around this time, walking away from JJ. You had to remind yourself that you were upset with him. He was so charming sometimes that you forgot.

“Y/N!” JJ hissed, grabbing onto your elbow before you could get far away from him.

You instantly broke free from his grip. “What’s your -”

BANG! BANG!

A loud bang on your door stopped you in the middle of your sentence. You looked to the door, then back at JJ. You raised your eyebrows in confusion but before he could answer you, the voice on the other side already did.

“Y/N!” It was Rafe. Your eyes widened and this time, you looked to JJ in shock. Had he known Rafe was coming and tried to push you inside?

“I was at the Wreck today and heard him talking about coming over to your house tonight. He knew your parents weren’t home tonight. I wanted to make sure you were alright.” JJ whispered to you, explaining what you already suspected.

BANG! BANG!

“Y/N! Are you inside?”

Before you could answer, Rafe banged on your front door again. You and JJ were in the back of your house anyways so you weren’t scared he would hear you.

“We need to hide for a little but I’m still upset with you.” You frowned at JJ, finally tiptoeing away from him.

You could feel JJ at your heels, following quickly behind you. “Why?” He was still whispering and you knew you would have to as well because now you were way closer to the front door.

You stopped and turned around, glancing at the backpack JJ had on. “Is that his money?”

JJ frowned, instantly knowing what you were talking about. He nodded solemnly. “I’m giving it to my dad tomorrow.”

You rolled your eyes. “That’s why.”

BANG! BANG!

“Y/N!” Rafe banged on your door again, this time calling out for you desperately.

JJ rolled his eyes, looking to the front door where Rafe was on the other side. “Does this guy ever give up?”

You scoffed. “How ironic.”

You tried to turn away from JJ again but he grabbed a hold of your shoulder, preventing you from doing so. “Hey,” JJ said softly, looking in your eyes. You tried to not make eye contact but you couldn’t help it. You felt yourself turn into putty as he grabbed onto your hands. “I told you, as a Kook, there’s some stuff you don’t understand. I need this money.”

You shook your head. “You’re right. I don’t understand.” Your anger boiled over again and this time you ripped away from JJ’s grasp. You could tell he was hurt by your actions but before he could say anything, you both heard a terrifying sound come from the door.

A key was unlocking the door. Rafe had a key to your house.

You acted before JJ could, grabbing onto him and pulling him farther and farther away from the front door. You tried to think of a place to hide in the small amount of time the both of you had but you couldn’t think fast enough. JJ saw you start to have difficulty and tugged on your hand, signalling to you he knew where to hide.

You looked to him, hearing the front door open. He pointed forward and you followed his finger to where he was pointing. When you saw what he was pointing at, you almost wanted to roll your eyes. No way. JJ could see your grumpy expression but before you had time to argue, he pulled you forward and opened the door to the closet in your hallway.

This was the closet where your parents kept all their cleaning supplies so the second you entered and JJ closed the door behind you, you were hit with the smell of disinfectant. Thankfully, the door had a lock on the inside and you locked it quietly.

“Y/N?” Rafe calls out for you, still adamant that you were home.

Both you and JJ stay completely silent, listening to Rafe’s footsteps. He doesn’t pass the closet but instead makes his way upstairs, hoping he’s lucky enough to find you in bed. When he’s finally upstairs, JJ speaks first.

“Why does he have your key?” He’s infuriated now, thinking you gave him your key and still haven’t asked for it back. Maybe you still had feelings for Rafe and were waiting it out until JJ screwed up to go back to Rafe. JJ’s insecurities were swallowing him whole.

“I don’t know…” You whisper, not looking at the angry blonde. You remember your lost key. You hadn’t seen it for weeks, just after your fight with Rafe. Had he stolen it from you? You didn’t want to believe it but you wouldn’t put it past Rafe. He was always possessive. But this was too far and now you were scared. How many times had he entered your house without your knowledge since your breakup. Would he watch you sleep? You felt your body go cold.

JJ could see the petrified look on your face and his face instantly softened. Although he wanted to tackle Rafe and hurt him for scaring you so badly, he knew that would not help the situation. You both had to just wait it out until he left. So, as you waited, JJ wrapped his arms around your body in an attempt to comfort you. You gladly leaned onto him and let his warmth envelop you. As much as you were angry with him, he was the only person that could calm you down.

“How many times have we hid in closets since we met?”

You laugh lightly at his attempt to joke at a time like this. “This is the third time.”

“Every couple has their cheesy thing. This is ours.” JJ continued to joke, running his hands through your hair.

You pulled away from his chest only slightly, just to get a better look at his face. “We’re not a couple.”

JJ smirks, leaning millimetres away from your lips and looking down at them. His hot breath fans your face. “Yes we are.”

You lean forward, trying to close the gap between you two. JJ pulls only a little farther away, not letting you kiss him. You let out a disgruntled sigh. “Say we are.” JJ pleads quietly.

You only nod, too proud to agree with him.

“I wanna hear you say it.”

You gulp, his whispers sending shivers down your spine. “We are.”

Finally, JJ closes the gap between the two of you allowing you two to kiss. The kiss is passionate and it makes your stomach flip with excitement. Everything else melts away for those moments your lips are on his. He’s all you ever need. You need him like you need oxygen. You want to mad at him but you can’t. Not anymore. You’re addicted. You wonder if this is what love feels like, but you already know the answer. You love him.

Before you can even come to terms with this new revelation, you hear the sound of a door slam. You both jump back, anxious that you’ve been caught. You hear the ignition of a motorcycle start and drive away, signalling to you and JJ that Rafe is gone. You both wait another minute to make sure and once you are, JJ unlocks and opens the closet door. He lets you exit first and he follows after you. You look out your window to make sure Rafe is gone and once you see that his motorcycle is actually gone, you feel a weight lift off your chest. You turn back to JJ, who is looking in his backpack.

“Let me see.” You demand, walking back to the blonde.

JJ swings the backpack over one of his shoulders, smiling at you. “See what?”

His jokes were not amusing right now. “Seriously JJ.”

“I’m never serious, hun. That’s part of my charm.” He quickly replies, placing a chaste kiss on your lips before walking ahead of you and opening your front door. “You shouldn’t sleep here tonight. Just in case that creep comes back.”

Although you agree with JJ, you could hear the smugness under his tone and you knew what he was implying. “I’m not having sex with you.”

JJ rolls his eyes, grabbing onto his chest as if to say you have hurt him. “I’m a gentleman.”

You rolled your eyes, approaching JJ at the door. “Not even close.”

“You’re the one who brought up sex Y/N.” JJ smirked, closing the door behind you. You walked hand in hand down your driveway, only stopping once so that JJ could tie his shoe.

“I only brought it up because I knew what you were insinuating.” You defended, resting your head on his shoulder as the both of you continued to walk down the road, towards JJ’s house. It was on the other side of OBX so you both had a long way to go.

“Well, since we’re insinuating, I’d say you want to have sex with me. Why bring that up if you didn’t think of it too.” You know he’s only half joking but he was right.

You scoffed, hiding the blush on your cheeks. “No I don’t. Let’s talk about something else.” You fidgeted with the hem of your shirt.

You both stay silent for a moment and JJ only speaks up when you round the corner, finally leaving your neighbourhood. “Have you never…”

You gulped. “Only once.” You thought of Rafe and frowned. It was your first and last time with him. There was so much pressure, both by Rafe and yourself, and you promised to never to do it again. Not until you were 100% sure.

“Well,” JJ said, kissing your forehead. “No pressure here.”

You smiled up at him, your chin leaning on his shoulder. You loved him so much it hurt.

~

JJ’s bedroom was nothing like yours but you liked it way more than your own bedroom. Although it wasn’t painted any colour and was messy, it had this cozy feeling to it; something no room in your house had. It was smaller and darker than yours but you felt the warmth of his room envelop you as you entered. The rest of his house was occupied by his father’s spirit, which was anger and emptiness but this part of the house was JJ’s and it felt like his too. His bed had dirty clothes thrown all over it and it looked like he hadn’t made his bed in weeks. He had one wooden cabinet with clothes spilling out and then, on top of the cabinet, one singular picture.

“Sorry for the mess.” JJ mumbled as he grabbed a handful of dirty clothes and threw them into a pile in the corner of his room. As he quickly made his room more presentable, you ventured over to his cabinet, wanting to see what the picture was of.

The picture was of JJ, Pope, John B, and Kiara but way younger. They were maybe twelve or thirteen and all their arms wrapped around each other smiling. This photo was a selfie of the young kids and JJ was the one holding the phone. While his friends were smiling sweetly, JJ was the only one pulling a cheeky grin with his tongue sticking out of his mouth. You smiled lightly, wishing you could’ve met JJ when you were younger. When he was more innocent. You believed that you would’ve been attracted to JJ’s rambunctious personality even if he was younger.

“I was twelve in that photo.” JJ says from behind you.

You turn around to him and smirk. “You look like a little delinquent.”

JJ chuckles. “I was.”

You pass JJ once again and move to the other side of his room, where his bed lay a little less messy. “I like your room.”

JJ followed right behind you, laughing. “Don’t lie.”

You whipped your head around, smiling. “I’m not. I really do.”

JJ raised his brows. “Your room is much nicer.”

“Your room is cozier.” You rebuttal, softly sitting down on the edge of JJ’s bed.

JJ follows after you, sitting down beside you. “You’re welcome here any time my dad’s not here.” He grabs your legs and lets them drape across his own. You scoot closer to his body and wrap your arms around his neck. He smiles down at you, wrapping his arms around your back.

“Your dad’s not here right now?” You question, leaning forward.

JJ shakes his head, leaning close to you. “No way. He’s out gambling. Will be there until tomorrow morning.”

“Good.” You smirked, finally closing the gap between the two of you and kissing him.

JJ kisses you back instantly. He’s kissing more passionately than ever and you kiss him just as passionate back. You feel the word love is stuck in your throat, just begging to come out. You want to tell him but you’re so nervous. You figured he felt the same but to be so vulnerable...

“Y/N...” JJ whispers, breaking your kiss.

“Yeah?” You ask, breathing heavily against his face. You were so wrapped up the kiss your eyes were still closed.

“I love you so much.”

Those words hit you like a ton of bricks and your eyes instantly fly open, revealing JJ’s beautiful face. You can see the look in his eyes and you know what it means. You always thought you would say it first because you knew how much JJ hated being vulnerable. You never thought - believed - that JJ would ever want to be that openly vulnerable with you. Especially if he was taking a chance.

“I love you.” You say back, kissing him quickly on the lips.

JJ smiles, his hands moving from your back to your jaw. He applies pressure and you instantly know he wants to kiss you again. You indulge him and let him kiss you again but only for a second before you pull away. In the utter happiness of the moment, you don’t think twice before letting go of JJ and grabbing the hem of your shirt and lifting it over your head. You discard it quickly and toss it to the floor before looking back at JJ.

He smirks slyly. “I knew it.”

You rolled your eyes, wrapping your arms around his neck again, pulling him close. “Shut up.”

JJ laughs loudly, the blush on your face deepening. “Are you sure? Or are you just trying to boast you can take off your shirt faster than me.” In those moments, when JJ was laughing so vibrantly, you wished you had a camera. To keep the memory forever.

“Yes, I’m sure. And how the hell do you take your shirt off?” You watch him with a smile on your face as you watch your boyfriend awkwardly slip one arm out of his shirt and do it with his second arm before slowly pulling it off.

You’re laughing hysterically now. When he finally has his shirt off you want to stop laughing but the tired face he has on is so funny, you can’t help it. “What the hell was that?”

JJ pouts. “I’m sorry, that’s just how I do it. Don’t make fun of me.”

You nod and stop laughing. You only smile at him as you lean forward again to kiss him again. He closes the gap and kisses you back. His hands are all over your body and you kiss him but your hands stay in his hair. Before he can deepen the kiss in any way, you start to laugh again.

JJ pulls away, a smile on his face. “What?”

“You look like a prisoner trying to take off their straightjacket.” You giggle, still thinking of how he awkwardly took off his shirt.

JJ playfully rolls his eyes. “We’re literally about to have sex and you’re laughing at me.”

You shrug, cupping his face. “I love you.”

JJ’s face softens. “I love you more.”

And in that moment, you both felt as if the happiness would never end.

But, it would.

~

taglist: @dolanfivsosxox @obxrush @bellakellyrose03 @belledutchess @sexualparkour @lueurglow @itsriasblog @maries110911 @ebonyyyy-e @teamnick @tangledinsparkles @sarahsmaybank @91912512 @shawnssongs @ssjiara @amarachoren @haute-shawn @blog-hannahnicole @xlittlemissydjx

[pan-fangirl-345]

Purple Heliotropes and Red Salvias

Summary: Tadashi didn’t think that loving his best friend would lead anywhere, and yet there he is, puking up flowers in a school bathroom. Where will he end up?

TW: Mentions of blood, vomit, and death. No one actually dies, but there are mentions of character deaths.

A/N: I’ve been going through a Hanahaki Disease AU phase, and now I’m subjecting you guys to it too. Good luck. I promise that it has a happy ending.

Tadashi knew something was wrong during practice.

He was slower than usual, and his breathing was becoming  hell of a lot harder than he thought was normal, but he hadn't been feeling very good lately, so he didn't think much of it until Suga said something.

"I promise, I'm okay," Tadashi assured his former vice-captain. The former third years had stopped by to see how the new team was doing, which meant that they were all much more preceptive than usual.

"You don't have a fever. Are you sure that you're feeling okay?"

"I'm fine, I just don't feel the greatest, I think it might be allergies," Tadashi explained, attempting to wave away his former vice-captain.

"If it gets any worse-"

"I'll let you know," Tadashi promised.

It didn't get worse, but it didn't get better either, and by the end of practice Tadashi was panting.

"Tadashi," Tsukishima murmured, laying a hand on Tadashi's back. Concern was lacing his facial features as they locked eyes.

"I'm fine," he gasped, hands on his knees as he tried to breath.

Suddenly, there was something coming up, clogging his throat.

"I-" He paused. "I'll be right back. I have to use the bathroom," he muttered, trying to walk as calmly as he could to the bathroom.

As soon as the door shut behind him, Tadashi was on his knees in front of the toilet, coughing and hacking as he tried to get it out of his throat.

When he was finally able to clear his throat, he stared in horror at the small purple petals that were floating on the surface of the water.

"No, no, no, no, no," he whispered, shaking his head.

This couldn't be happening. He was not doing this. Not now. Not when they were so close to their tournament.

He couldn't do this, he wasn't going to go through the hassle of trying to figure out who it was, what he was going to do about it, and why this was happening to him now.

"Tadashi?" Hinata asked, rubbing his back as he appeared. "Oh no."

"You can't tell anyone," he croaked, voice and throat raw. "Not until I figure this out."

"Yamaguchi, I need to tell Suga, or Daichi! Or Tsukishima so he can-"

"Tsukki can't know," Tadashi ordered. "He doesn't need this, and I can't burden him with this," he rasped.

"But . . . isn't he the reason that you-"

"Probably, but I've been expecting this, probably more than anything," Tadashi whispered, voice still hoarse.

Hanahaki wasn't rare, and he was likely to get it, he had been in love with he friend every day since they were kids, and it was about as unrequited as it could've gotten in their scenario.

There was a kind of beauty to the flowers, Tadashi supposed, having gone through a small botany phase when he was younger.

Heliotropes represented eternal love and devotion, and Tadashi supposed that it made sense.

There was a kind of sadness to the flowers too, with how small the petals were.

"Tadashi, you know that you'll have to confess right?" Hinata asked, crouching down beside Tadashi as he rubbed the pinch server's back.

"No." It slipped out before Tadashi even had time to think the answer through.

"No? But Tadashi! If you don't then . . . ." Hinata trailed off, looking close to tears.

"I'll die, I know," Tadashi whispered. "I know, but . . . have you ever been in love Hinata?" Tadashi asked.

"Yes."

The answer was so firm that Tadashi turned to look at the small red-head. There was nothing but a small, fond smile on the red-head's face.

"Would you want to get the surgery? If it was you in my position?" Tadashi asked. "Would you want to get rid of something that made you smile like that whenever you thought about the person? Would you want to forget the little things that they do to make you smile? The little things that only you know about? Would you want to forget the things they did to make you fall in love?"

"No."

"Then you can't tell me that I need the surgery," Tadashi told him.

"There's a difference between want and need," Hinata said, getting a sad look on his face.

"Maybe, but I've made my choice," Tadashi murmured.

"Sometimes I envy you Tadashi," Hinata admitted, sinking to the floor with him. "I envy the way that Tsukishima looks at you. The way you look at each other. I envy what you have. My person . . . they'll never look at me like you look at each other. They'll never care for me like that."

Coughing wracked Hinata's body, and Tadashi realized that they were in the same boat, just in different stages.

A full flower was sitting peacefully on top of the water, dying it pink with Hinata's blood. 

The black sunflower looked menacing to Tadashi, but there was something about it.

"Kageyama," Tadashi whispered.

"Ding, ding, ding," Hinata rasped, leaning against the wall heavily.

It was concerning, how big the flower was, and how small Hinata was in comparison.

"How long?"

"A couple of months. It'll start taking something out of me soon, and my mom has already scheduled the surgery," Hinata said.

"Do you want the surgery?"

"No," Hinata admitted.

Tadashi tucked Hinata into his side, a small comfort, from someone who understood.

"I'll keep your secret if you keep mine," Tadashi murmured.

"Deal," Hinata agreed.

~~~~~~~~~~

Things were okay for a few weeks, Tadashi decided. He wasn't coughing flowers very much yet, and Hinata was still fighting, still flying high.

Then Hinata pulled Tadashi aside and said, "I need your help. My surgery, it's this weekend, and I want to let Kageyama know how I feel now, before that feeling leaves, and I need your help."

"Okay, what do you plan on doing?"

"I was thinking about writing a letter."

"That's a good idea. I'll come by after practice to help, okay?" Tadashi asked.

Hinata nodded then gave Tadashi a teary-eyed smile.

"I'm sorry, Tadashi," he murmured, before he went wide eyed and dashed down the hallway again.

Tadashi was wondering what he was sorry for, but then there was someone spinning him around and he was faced with the rage of Kageyama.

"What was he talking to you about?" Kageyama snarled.

"Hey, King, can you get your hands off my friend?" Tsukishima said, not really asking.

"Oh, right, sorry," Kageyama murmured, letting Tadashi go. "But he's been avoiding me like the plague. What was he talking to you about?"

"Homework. He wanted some help with his homework, and Yachi was busy," Tadashi murmured, giving Kageyama a small smile.

"Homework. Right."

Kageyama clearly didn't believe him, but he didn't press, probably because Tsukishima was standing at Tadashi's back, an intimidating presence.

"Are you okay?" Tsukishima asked.

"Yeah, thanks Tsukki," Tadashi said, giving him a wide smile, holding back the flowers that were crawling up his throat quickly.

"So what was the Shorty actually talking to you about?"

"He's . . . confessing to someone, and wanted my help."

"What would you know about confessions?" Tsukishima drawled.

Tadashi didn't say anything, he couldn't there were flowers clogging his throat, but the words hurt.

Tadashi's eyes watered as he held it in.

He squinted at the clock, decided he had enough time, and headed for the bathroom coughing into his handkerchief, trying to collect all the petals.

Once he was sure he was alone, he fell to his knees, kneecaps groaning in protest as he hit hard, cold tile, but he had more important things to worry about as he gagged, throwing up whatever was in his stomach into the toilet, small flowers floating on the surface peacefully.

Full flowers. That wasn't a good sign.

Next there would be stems, then leaves, the roots, until they started to puncture his lungs and squeeze his heart until he choked to death trying to cough up something that shouldn't have been in his lungs in the first place.

Tadashi sucked in a quick breath, flushed the toilet and rinsed out his mouth.

He needed to act normally, even though he was dying. He had a mission, and he would fight to see it accomplished.

Hinata had been fighting for a long time, and if he could do it, Tadashi could too.

It took more out of him than he thought it would. He hadn't realized how much time he spent with Tsukki until he got Hanahaki.

He'd coughed up seven more flowers by lunch, and had almost thrown up three times.

The excuse of helping Hinata write his letter made it easier to leave Tsukki when they parted ways, but there was still the ache in his chest. 

It was either suffer through the pain of Hanahaki, or the pain of not having the love of his life by his side.

"Your flowers are growing a lot faster now, aren't they?" Hinata asked when Tadashi coughed them into a bucket Hinata had hidden under his bed.

Tadashi nodded, letting Hinata inspect the contents.

"Yours are growing faster than mine did."

"I've been in love with Tsukki for a long time Hinata, for longer than you've even known about Kageyama," Tadashi explained.

"Have you decided what you're going to do?"

"I'm not confessing, and the surgery isn't an option, so I guess I'm dying," Tadashi admitted.

Hinata sighed.

"This sucks ass," Hinata muttered. "Would you confess, if you knew he loved you back?"

"Maybe, but that's the thing. He doesn't return my feelings, and I've known that for a while. He doesn't return my feelings and I can't say that I blame him."

"What does it feeling like for you Tadashi? Being in love I mean?"

"I know he'll always be by my side. I know that no matter what batshit crazy things come out of my mouth he'll understand, in some way. It's a reassuring feeling of belonging. It's lazy Sundays filled with sleeping in and comfy clothes and home."

"It's so different from mine," Hinata confessed. "For me, it's like running through a field and it's all 'fwaaahh' and 'haha!'."

"Because your heart isn't meant to be tamed, it meant to be ran with. You're an very free spirit, Hinata, kind of like a horse. To you, Kageyama is the wolf friend that runs with you."

"We're crows that fly together," Hinata mumbled.

"Exactly," Tadashi told him.

"I should write that down," Hinata murmured.

"Are you gonna sign it? Or are you going to let him brew on it?" Tadashi asked.

Hinata took a few minutes to respond since he was coughing up flowers, making Tadashi wince at the flowers that resided in the now-shared bucket.

"No. It won't make a difference if he knows it's me or not. It won't change how he feels. It might just inflate his ego a little bit," Hinata rasped, spitting into the bucket after washing his mouth out.

"That doesn't answer my question Hinata," Tadashi told him.

"I don't think I will," Hinata admitted. "I won't remember him after this weekend. The feelings won't ever come back."

"He'll want to know who it's from. He might go looking. Start asking question," Tadashi informed Hinata, who shrugged.

"Hinata, he has a right to know."

"Maybe, but . . . I think it'll hurt him more than help him," Hinata confessed.

"Hinata, put your name on that letter. Kageyama is a lot of things, subtle isn't one of them. He loves you, Hinata, but he's just not very good at proving it."

"He's in love with someone," Hinata agrees. "It just isn't me."

"What are you talking about?"

"I was going to confess, when this whole thing first started, but . . . when I asked him if he had ever been in love, he said yes, and he wouldn't tell me who it was. He doesn't love me back Tadashi, and I'm okay with that."

"How? How can you be okay with that?" Tadashi asked quietly.

"You didn't see the smile on his face when he talked about them Tadashi. He got this really fond smile, and it softened his entire face like 'awwww', and he looked so . . . happy, Tadashi. He never looks at me like that. I don't care if he doesn't love me back. As long as he's happy, then I can be okay with it."

Hinata had tears streaking down his face and when the hacking started Tadashi felt like crying himself.

"I'm so sorry, Hinata, I'm so sorry," Tadashi whispered, wrapping his arms around his friend as the tears started to leak from his own eyes and his voice cracked with emotions.

________________

The next day, Hinata looked drained, he wasn't exuding his normal excitement.

"Hinata?" Tadashi asked.

"There was a stem this morning, when we raced each other to the school. It's getting worse. At this rate, I'll be dead before the surgery even happens," he whispered, voice hoarse.

"Did he see it?"

"Kinda hard to miss," Hinata said, looking close to tears. "He had no clue what was wrong. Tadashi . . . the way he looked at me, the panic in his face . . . ." Hinata really did start crying then, big tears, like the ones they had shed the night before.

"I know, I know," Tadashi murmured, wrapping Hinata in a hug, moving them to a bathroom.

"I added something to the letter this morning. I told him it was me and explained everything that was going on. I slipped it into his bag while we were racing. He's probably found it by now, and I don't know what to expect. Tadashi, I'm terrified," Hinata admitted, once he got his composure back.

"I know, I know," Tadashi repeated slowly, curling his hands through Hinata's hair, trying to soothe the small middle blocker.

"Tadashi, what do I do?" Hinata asked.

"I don't know Hinata, hope for the best?"

Hinata sobbed and Tadashi wondered what would happen to him if he confessed to Tsukishima and he got rejected. He wasn't getting the surgery, he would never willingly give this up, but . . . what if he had no choice? What if someone found out and told his moms?

The pain in his throat crawled up and he let Hinata go to cough into the toilet.

Tears pricked his eyes and he could practically feel the plant ripping his throat on the way up.

He gagged, feeling his stomach roil around as the flowers flowed from his mouth like a river.

"Yours is almost as bad as mine," Hinata remarked sadly.

Tadashi nodded.

"At least we aren't going through this alone," Hinata murmured, giving Tadashi a hand up after he flushed the toilet.

"True, but it would be better if we weren't going through it at all," Tadashi grumbled, making Hinata laugh sadly.

"Ain't that the truth," he murmured, following Tadashi back to his classroom.

Hinata's eyes went wide, and he bolted, so Tadashi assumed he had spotted Kageyama.

"You and the Shrimp are spending a lot of time together lately 'Dashi," Tsukishima mused, hard look on his face. "Anything I should know about?"

For a nanosecond, for a fraction of the smallest slice of time, Tadashi considered telling Tsukishima everything, about Hinata, about himself, about he had been feeling since middle school, and then it was all wiped away by the worst case scenario. By the thought of Tsukishima throwing it all back in his face and laughing. Of Tsukishima walking away and leaving him behind again.

"It's nothing Tsukki, don't worry about it. You might want to take your seat, the teacher warned us about what would happen-"

"Fuck the teacher Tadashi," Tsukishima snapped, nearly slamming his hands down on his friend's desk. "There's something wrong, and I want to know what it is. For god's sake Tadashi, when did you start hiding things from me?"

"When I started to have something to lose," Tadashi replied, letting the mask fall for a moment. "You don't need to know about this Kei, not right now. I can't risk-"

Tadashi shut his mouth so quickly that his teeth clacked together audibly.

"Fine, talk to me when you're ready to stop lying to my face," Tsukishima snapped.

Tadashi blinked back tears, tearing a hand through his hair.

He and Tsukishima had fought before, but never like this, they had usually made up by the end of it, having forgotten what they were even arguing about.

Tadashi suddenly realized how tired he was, how deep the ache in his bones really was, how heavy his body was, how much effort it took to keep his eyes open.

Just one more day, just one more week, you can do this Tadashi, he thought to himself as he forced himself to pay attention in class, to not let into the ache.

It all came to a head at practice that night.

He'd been feeling worse and worse throughout the day, and Hinata had reported the same thing.

"I . . . will . . . reach . . . the . . . summit," Hinata panted, wiping sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand.

Kageyama nodded beside him, giving Hinata a fond look.

Tsukishima had never looked at Tadashi like that, and he doubted that he would now.

The ache throbbed and so did Tadsahi's lungs.

Or maybe Tadashi's lungs were causing the ache and his body was responding to it.

Tadashi's vision blurred in front of him as the whistle blew and Kageyama whispered something to Hinata.

Tadashi's serve went up, and so did he, but, as the ball hit the other side of the court, Tadashi hit the floor heavily, coughs wracked his body, flowers ripping out of him with a vengeance as he tried to keep them hidden in his hands.

Not now, not here, Tadashi begged whatever higher being and deity was listening. Not in front of Kei, not in front of my team.

"-Dashi! Tadashi!"

Tadashi tried to open his eyes to look up at Tsukishima, but he couldn't. He was tired, and he just wanted to sleep.

"S-Sorry Tsukki," he gasped, coughing up more flowers in between words, trying and failing to get enough oxygen into his lungs.

His vision was blurry, getting darker around the edges.

"I'm s-sorry," he whispered.

____________________

(Tsukishima's POV)

The incessant beeping of the heart monitor was annoying, but it was the only thing convincing Kei that his best friend was even alive.

The rise and fall of his chest was so shallow, and the drip of the IV was concerning.

Kei had been holding Tadashi's hand since he had gotten to his side.

He also hadn't stopped crying since he had gotten to Tadashi.

Kei should've known, he should've known that something was wrong. Tadashi had been his best friend since they were kids, he should've known that Tadashi was sick.

He should've noticed the flowers sooner, he should've seen the signs. He was suffering from them too after all.

Daichi was standing by the door, as were Nishinoya and Narita. Asahi was there too, and the others were with Hinata, who had collapsed after blocking a spike from Tanaka, couching up blood and big black sunflowers.

Tadashi had been coughing up purple heliotropes, and Kei had automatically known who Tadashi was in love with.

They'd gone through a botany phase together as children, before Tsukishima had gotten into dinosaurs and Tadashi had become interested in art.

Kei had been coughing up red salvias for about two weeks, right after Tadashi had started acting different.

He knew what was happening, but Tadashi had been pulling away, talking with Hinata more often than not, touching him constantly, and Kei had assumed that they were getting closer.

He hadn't expected this.

Tadashi hadn't told him, hadn't wanted to lose what they had, so he had been killing himself.

"You idiot," Kei snapped, his first words in hours.

"Tsukishima, take it easy," Nishinoya murmured.

Kei ignored him.

"You honestly thought I would reject you? You thought I would throw away the only friend I've ever had? That I didn't care about you like this? 'Dashi, how could you be so blind?" Kei asked, kissing Tadashi's knuckles lightly.

He had never thought Tadashi would got his far. Kei had thought that Tadashi had known how he felt. It wasn't like he put up with anyone else, except maybe Yachi, and that was purely platonic.

"Please, just wake up," Kei pleaded, laying his head on the bed.

"I'm going to call Yamaguchi's moms again," Daichi murmured, slipping out.

Narita convinced Noya to go check on Hinata before slipping out himself, laying a comforting hand on Kei's shoulder.

"Tadashi please," Kei begged. "I need you. I need you to be okay. I need you to be by my side. I need you. I'm in love with you Tadashi, and you can't leave before I tell you to your face, okay? I need to tell you, to apologize for earlier, for every time I-"

Kei stopped as he choked on a sob.

"You're my best friend, idiot, I love you!"

The tears returned full force, landing in wet splotched on Tadashi's arm, splattering over the covers, landing in Kei's hands where they were clutching Tadashi's tightly.

"Ts-Tsukki?"

Kei's head popped up as Tadashi blinked blearily at him.

"Tadashi," he whispered, throwing his arms around his friend.

"Where am I?"

"The hospital. You had a flower fit, remember?"

"Where are the others?"

"Either with Hinata or waiting in the lobby for parents," Kei explained.

"Hinata? Did they take him in for surgery?" Tadashi tried for sit up but ended up coughing up a bunch of bloody flowers instead.

"Don't try to sit up, moron," Kei hissed, pushing him back down by his shoulders. "The King already spilled his guts about everything to the Shrimp. Hinata's fine now, tired and in need of some serious training to get back where he was, but fine."

"Thank goodness," Tadashi murmured, relaxing under Kei's hands. "Listen, I'm sorr-"

"Don't apologize to me Tadashi," Kei murmured, stroking Tadashi's face with his thumb lightly, running it over the freckles he loved so much. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gotten jealous and mad at you, it was stupid and I just want you to be-"

A coughing fit over took Kei, who grimaced, releasing Tadashi's hands.

"Tsukki?" Tadashi reached out to him. "Tsukki, what's-"

His question stopped when he glanced at the little red petals in Kei's hands, glaringly obvious against Kei's paler complextion, and Tadashi's hands went to his mouth.

"Oh, Tsukki, I'm so sorry," Tadashi whispered. "Who are they for? I bet it's that girl from Class 5, right? The one with the-"

"They aren't for some . . . girl, Tadashi," Kei snapped, snatching Tadashi's hands up from where they were resting against his stomach. "They're for you."

"That's not funny Kei," Tadashi said, angrily.

"I know it's not," Kei replied, just as serious as Tadashi was. "I've been coughing them up for two weeks. I knew who they were for as soon as I coughed up the first petal. They're red salvias, Tadashi. Do you remember what they mean?"

"Forever mine," Tadashi whispered. "They mean forever mine," he said, a little bit louder.

"How did you not notice Tadashi?" Kei asked, giving his best friend a small smile, rubbing soothing circles on Tadashi's skin.

"You just never . . . I mean, we never . . . I never thought that . . . ." Tadashi trailed off and stared at their joined hands for a moment before he said, "I just never thought that you would ever think about me like that."

"Tadashi," Kei murmured, leaning their foreheads together. "I'm sorry for the way I acted earlier, I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's okay," Tadashi murmured, pulling one hand away from Kei's so that he could tangle it in Kei's hair.

"I'm in love with you, and I have been for a while," Kei admitted, and he could feel the heat rise to his cheeks.

"Me too," Tadashi said, the teasing lilt in his voice apparent. "I love you, Tsukishima Kei."

Kei smiled at him, real, and wide, and Tadashi smiled back at him.

"Why did you wait so long to tell me?" Tsukishima asked.

"Like I said, I just never though that you were interested in me," Tadashi muttered, glancing everywhere but his friend.

Kei frowned.

Looking back, he had never really shown any romantic interest towards Tadashi, he had been so worried about letting it show that he had been kind of an asshole.

"I'm sorry," Kei mumbled. "I should've-"

"I know now," Tadashi said, cutting him off, moving his hand deeper into Kei's hair.

Kei nodded, nudging Tadashi's nose with his own.

The sounds of crying made them both pull away, and they saw Tadashi's mother hurtling around the corner.

Kei moved so she could sit beside her son. She was rightly upset, since she didn't seem to have known that her son was sick.

His mom was there in the next five minutes, trying to comfort her wife and her son at the same time and looking more than a little panicked.

Kei slipped out, heading down to the cafeteria. 

He hadn't been eating much, and as much as hospital food didn't sound appealing, he was willing to eat pretty much anything.

He got something for Tadashi too, and then, ten minutes later, left it on a spare chair in his room, before starting to slip out.

"Tsukki? Where are you going?"

"I . . . I wasn't sure you wanted me around, so I was going to go home."

"Kei, come here," Tadashi ordered, opening his arms. "The IV itches and pinches and I am this close to just yanking it out."

Deciding that Tadashi really couldn't do that, Kei moved to sit in the chair, but Tadashi made a small noise of protest, tugging on Kei's sleeve.

"Come here," Tadashi demanded, pulling his friend into the bed with him.

"I'm not sure this is-"

"Kei," Tadashi grumbled, more of a whine than anything. "I want cuddles!"

Kei . . . couldn't argue with that. They hadn't been touching as much and he missed the solid warmth of his friend tucked into his side.

"What about your moms? And the team?"

"Fuck 'em," Tadashi muttered, burying his face in Kei's shirt, tangling their legs together.

Kei snorted, then regretted it when his throat protested.

"Kei, I'm really sorry," Tadashi murmured.

"If I can't apologize then neither can you," Kei countered, burying his face in Tadashi's hair.

Tadashi opened his mouth again, then shut it. 

"I really missed you," Tadashi whispered.

"I missed you too," Kei murmured, burying his face in Tadashi's hair.

"Hey, Yamaguchi-" Suga stopped in the doorway, giving them a soft smile. "I'm glad things worked out."

He disappeared down the hallway again and Kei couldn't help the blush that crept up his cheeks.

"We do this all the time at home, why does this embarrass you?" Tadashi asked, touching Kei's face lightly.

"It doesn't," Kei said.

"Then why is your face a strawberry?"

"It's not!"

"Yes it is!"

"Sh-Shut up Dashi!"

"You love me and you know it."

"I do."

He really did.

[razorblade180-heated]

Plugged

[Lewd!!!!]

Anniversaries, they’re important as hell. You would think after the first one that it would be less important or you don’t have to be as extravagant. That’s really stupid logic, and luckily Oscar wasn’t stupid. However, he was sad. Today marked the three year anniversary with Penny as his girlfriend but she had work tonight. Now he was in his shared apartment watching movies on the couch upside down with Jaune. It wasn’t terrible, but Oscar would much rather be doing his best to show Penny a good time at the beach picnic he’d plan. The moon was full tonight and everything!

The movie soon reached its credits and Jaune looked over at his clearly lovesick roommate. “Wanna watch another movie?”

“I didn’t really want to watch this one, and why am I the only one watching these upside down?”

Jaune tilted his head to see the boy's expression. “Because I was tired of seeing that sad pouty face. Buck up! You rescheduled your date for this weekend. That’s two days away!”

“But it feels less special…” Oscar groaned.

Jaune looked at him in disbelief. “I swear you’re just a male Ruby. She thinks like that.”

“I don’t know how I feel about that coming from you. Are you coming on to me Jaune?” Oscar smirked to make him uncomfortable. “Did you pick me as a roommate because I remind you of your girlfriend? How scandalous.”

Jaune chucked a pillow at Oscar and caused him to fall over on the floor and laugh. Jaune would be mortified but at least Oscar was smiling.

“Do not make those jokes young man! I fully believe Ruby would be down to clown with both of us now that you’re eighteen.”

“Uhh, I’m taken, remember?”

“Do you honestly believe Penny wouldn’t okay it? Ruby set you two up and your girlfriend is nice enough to let Ruby pull a crazy idea like that.”

Oscar’s face turned a little red. Jaune was not wrong. Penny would totally say “sounds neat” then give him a thumbs up. That was the thing about dating her, she was curious about everything the world had to offer. Especially with relationships. Not that he wasn’t, but such an idea was….

“Keep your mind out of the gutter Oscar.” Ozpin chimed in, internally. “Typical, haven’t slept with anyone and yet you fantasize the more advanced things. Oh virgins.”

Oscar’s face got redder.“Shut up! Just because you know I thought about it doesn’t mean you gotta bring it up.”

“Someone has to call you out on it.”

“Then let it be the person who actually pays rent.”

“Oh I’m sorry, who got you your job? Who works the night shifts when you’re sleepy? Maybe I should lock myself away whenever it’s time to pull a double?”

Oscar sucked on his teeth for a minute. “Oz…” he said kindly, “Let’s not fight, or do anything drastic.”

“Look at the tv.” Oz said bluntly.

Oscar looked at it to see his reflection. It crossed its arms and rolled its eyes before returning to normal. Oscar knew he was the only one seeing that but it never stopped being weird. Especially after the marathon of horror movies he did with Penny one time. Oz made sure to use every scare tactic imaginable that night. He just can’t help himself sometimes.

Jaune finally found another to watch but didn’t get the chance to play it. The doorbell rang, causing him to spring up and answer it.

“Expecting someone?” Oscar asked.

Jaune looked through the peephole and smiled. “Kinda sorta” he opened the door and Penny jumped inside the room wearing Oscar’s green flannel and ripped blue jean shorts: along with brown snow boots. A picnic basket was on her left shoulder and Ruby around her right.

“Happy Anniversary!!!”

“PENNY!!?” Oscar screamed. He immediately stood up to look less lame and opened his arms to his rapidly approaching girlfriend. He wasn’t expecting her to jump into his arms though. Oscar braced his body for impact but was surprised when she landed in his arms no heavier than a regular girl. 130 pounds at best, which was nothing to him. He could swing her.

“Hey you’re in you’re in your polymer shell. I thought you had work?”

Ruby raised her hand. “I stole her.”

Jaune and Oscar looked at each other highly concerned. They didn’t need Atlas military busting down their door and dragging them to jail. Ruby broke out into a laugh from their expressions.

“Relax, I’m just joking. We begged James. He’s such a softie.”

“I’ve also put in more hours than usual in preparation for this day!” Penny kissed Oscar’s cheek and couldn’t hide her excitement. Not like she ever did. In a way, she was like Ruby but more outgoing. Oscar couldn’t help but think about what Jaune said earlier. Maybe Jaune saw all of us like Ruby. That’s a weird thought.

As happy as he was, Oscar couldn’t help notice the picnic basket.

“Penny, is that for the food?”

“Of course! What else would I use it for?”

Oscar let out a defeated sigh. “I don’t know but we should figure that out because I didn’t cook anything because we rescheduled.”

Penny opened her mouth but nothing came out. She turned to Ruby who was face palming. Jaune clapped his hands together and mimicked Oscar’s sigh.

“Welp! At least you two are together!” Jaune smiled, saving the positive energy in the room.

“Yeah!” Penny tossed the basket on the couch. “Home cooking isn’t the most important thing. Who needs it?”

Ruby went to their fridge and opened it. She couldn’t believe just how food was stuffed in it. Oscar was going all out this time. Ruby closed the fridge and pulled out their pots. “New plan, the two of you cook the food and have dinner here. It would suck for the food to spoil.”

Oscar thought about it. “What about you two?”

“It’s an anniversary, not a double date. We’ll just go to my place.” Ruby answered.

“Why does this sound like an elaborate plan for you to sleep with Jaune?”

“Hahaha! I don’t need a plan for that.” Ruby smiled at Jaune but he squinted at her.

“Just because it’s true doesn’t me you have to say it.” He grabbed his shoes and took his girlfriend by the hand to leave.

Ruby waved her friends goodbye and winked before closing the door. Oscar thought Ruby was a little more gitty than usual. It had been a couple of weeks since her and Jaune were together so something was bound to go down between them. Penny took off her shoes and put her hands on Oscar’s shoulders. She positioned him over the couch and made him sit.

“Ummmm Penny?”

“Since I made the plans derail, I’ll cook and you find something nice to put on for the both of us okay?”

“But that’s kinda unf-”

Penny leaned down and pressed her lips gently against Oscar’s. The kiss felt like it was minutes long but must’ve only been several seconds. Strange, it felt a little warmer than usual. Penny pulled back and smiled her usual beautiful smile, then walked to the kitchen. That kiss scattered Oscar’s thoughts, so he stared at the tv for a minute before remembering to find a movie. If he objected then Penny would simply stun him with another kiss. A nice way to say “shut up”but she’d probably end up burning food if he constantly distracted her.

Oscar grabbed the remote and began scrolling, his reflection in the tv moving on its own again. It paced from side to side while rubbing his chin.

“Don’t you find this a bit odd?” Oz asked.

“Yeah, please stop walking in front of the synopsis.”

“That’s not what I- sorry.” He stepped to the side. “I was referring to your anniversary.”

“What’s so odd about it?”

“You had plans, had to reschedule, then the plans went back to normal unexpectedly, but it’s fine because Ruby already had a solution that works well for everyone. Even Mr. Arc didn’t seem too surprised.”

Oscar shrugged, “You think too much.”

“Gah! So you’re not even going to entertain the idea of something going on? Though I suppose since Penny can’t lie, this could really be coincidence.”

The clicking and presses slowly came to a halt. Now he was rubbing his chin. What Oz said was true. Penny can’t lie because she’ll hiccup however, she didn’t tell him in person. Penny texted him and Ruby can plan tricks as easy as killing grimm. Oz sensed Oscar’s doubt.

“You know I’m right. No way they would just forget that you were in charge of food and had to cook it. I’m sure there’s a harmless explanation but you know, keep your wits about.”

“I could just ask her.”

“Boring but effective. Whatever floats your boat.” Oz finally left the young man alone to his devices. Oscar didn’t appreciate the jab he just took.

“Pfft, you’re boring.” Oscar directed his attention to Penny. She was so focused on preparing the meal that she hadn’t noticed he was looking right at her. He really was lucky to have her. She would probably say Oscar was exaggerating but he genuinely believed that she gave him all the happiest he could ever ask for. Days simply couldn’t be terrible as long as Penny stood by him, even when things got rough. Scheme or no scheme, Oscar didn’t worry. He knew Penny. Good intentions ran through her more than anybody else on Remnant.

xxxx

“Food’s ready!” Penny chanted as she carried two plates with steak, sliced potatoes, and fresh greens over to the small coffee table in front of the tv so they can watch movies while they eat. Oscar never got enough of her smile. It might’ve been because he was a little hungry and he knew her cooking was better than his but right now, Oscar wanted to marry this girl. One day hopefully, on another anniversary.

“Have I ever told you how happy I am to be with you?”

Penny’s face grew a little red. “All the time, and yet it still feels unreal admittedly.” She rubbed the back of her head and laughed sheepishly. “I don’t think I’ll ever get over it.”

Oscar gave her a quick kiss and smiled. “Happy anniversary. Wait here while I get your gift.”

Her eyes lit up with excitement as she watched him walk off to his room and come out with a small rectangular box. “Aww, you didn’t have to get me anything.”

“Penny, you built me a car last year. I can’t reach that level of awesome but I’m at least going to spoil you every chance I get. It would be a crime if I got you nothing.”

“You make it sound like building a car would be hard. It’s way easier than most of the things Atlas military creates on a daily basis.”

“No matter what you say, you’re not gonna downplay that gift. Anyways…” he handed her the box.

Penny wasted no time unwrapping the paper and opening it.The girl’s eyes got bigger and let out a gasp. “Oscar, is this…” she pulled out a golden chain that had a heart shaped locket on it that had intricate carvings of what looked like branches. Her finger lifted the top up and inside was two gears that spun. One green, and the other orange.

“No matter the inside, you’re as natural as nature itself.” Oscar said. “I’m not the greatest at making things like this but-”

“I love you.”

Her words caught him off guard and made his heart skip a beat. He looked at his girlfriend who had gotten a little teary eyed. She put the locket on and gave a heartfelt smile. “Well, how does it look?”

“Perfect…” that was all Oscar could manage to say. He didn’t know why but he felt so embarrassed. She never failed to make him feel so flustered. That’s love for you, it always made every minute feel extraordinary and uncharted territory.

“So...I guess it’s my turn to explain my present to you.” Penny said, anxiously rubbing her finger across the couch cushion.

“Man, I thought the highlight was the surprise appearance and you cooking dinner. There’s more?”

“Oh yeah.” Penny laughed nervously. “Oscar, you know you always say that you’re perfectly happy with the way things are between us, despite us not necessarily being a normal couple?”

“Yeah, why?” Penny could hear a bit of concern in his voice and started getting frazzled.

“Don’t worry! I feel the same way!” A hiccup came out right as she finished that statement, making her cover her mouth instinctively. Now Oscar looked really concerned.

“Umm, you sure about that?” He asked, pensively.

This conversation was going nowhere fast. Penny tried to do collateral damage as fast as she could.

“No no no, it’s not what you think! Honestly I’m super happy. It’s just….”

Oscar raised his eyebrow and tilted his head. “Just…?”

This was harder to say than Penny thought. The words were there but she couldn’t put them together right. All that information at her disposal and here she was, struggling with simple sentences. Penny took a deep breath and started over.

“Oscar, you love me the way that I am. You’ve had since the beginning. I didn’t have to change a single thing about me but I did anyway so we could enjoy each other’s company better. Like this polymer model so we could do things like go swimming.”

“Yeah, sinking to the bottom of a lake wasn’t the best first date experience.”

They both chuckled at that memory. Time sure did fly.

“Precisely. Then there were other upgrades over time to help me feel more human. Receptors for, taste, eating in general, heat, touch…” her trailed off.

Oscar’s focus was broken for a moment when the sound of Oz’s voice started speaking to him.

“Oscar I’m going to lock myself in your head for awhile so don’t expect any help with anything. Good luck.”

He wasn’t sure what Oz meant by that but he didn’t get the chance to ask before he felt the man’s presence leave. Oscar focused on Penny again who had gotten closer to him on the couch. There was practically no space between them as they sat side by side.

Oscar felt Penny take his hand. Had she always been this warm? Felt this...soft? It was more natural than usual. Maybe she got another upgrade? That was common.

“Oscar, I...I feel so normal around you. Things that usually make me feel out of place, well I don’t get that feeling with you.”

“I feel the same way. As far as I’m concerned, we are a normal couple Penny.”

“Then shouldn’t we be doing normal couple things? The things Ruby and Jaune do?”

That question lingering in the air momentarily for Oscar as his girlfriend stared at him, red blush spread across her face. His own face started to get red the more he acknowledged what Penny had just said. He watched the girl lean closer to him until he had no choice but to prop himself up with his forearm as Penny took the bold move to straddle him. She gently took his hand and placed it on her right boob, squeezing it slightly. Oscar felt like he was about to pass out.

“P-Penny?”

“I didn’t have work today.” She admitted. “With the help of Ceil, Ruby and I managed to get me some upgrades I’ve wanted for a while. Like better touch sensitivity, the way my skin feels, and other...components.”

Both of them were a blushing mess at that last part. Oscar was smart enough to know what she meant. The reason however, that escaped him a little.

“Why go through all this? I mean, I never went into this expecting you to do something like this for me.”

“Because even if you’re happy with me emotionally, I don’t want to rob you of the physical experience a real girl could provide. I know you try and I hide it but you’re still a boy with needs.”

He couldn’t deny that. There were many times he looked at Penny or thought of her in a physical way that made his imagination go a little rampant. He was young after all, and she was so beautiful. Oscar felt a little guilty for not being upfront about it with her and avoided her gaze. Penny reached for his face though and turned it back towards her. She wanted to see those beautiful eyes of his when she confessed.

“ I did it for myself as well. Oscar I want to be close to you, feel connected to you. Doing this, is a thing I put a lot of thought into. I wanna try at least once. So please, will you have sex with me?”

She was nervous, down right terrified of what Oscar might say. Was this too much as once? Would he deny her request? Oscar was just looking up into her eyes silently with no indication on what was going through his mind. Penny was beginning to think this was a terrible mistake and removed his hand. She started to move off of him when Oscar suddenly sat up. His hand wrapped around her waist and Penny yelped as he placed her on his lap. Now they’re face to face, inches away from each other with red tint darker than Ruby’s hair.

“Oscar?” Penny whispered, anxiously waiting for him to speak. The way he leaned in compelled her to do the same.

“Penny, stop saying you’re not a real girl.” Oscar pressed his lips against hers. He could feel them tremble slightly before returning the embrace with more than equal force, rubbing Oscar’s chin at slightly pulling down on it to slide her tongue in. The sudden act gave Oscar shivers and made him pull her in closer. This wasn’t their first kiss like this, but it was definitely the first time it made Oscar this anxious. The tension he felt right now to stop himself from going too far or fast felt like he was playing tug o'war against a Goliath. That feeling went away the moment a small and fleeting warmth hit his face. Oscar broke off the kiss to see Penny teary eyed. The girl let out a giggle and started wiping them away.

“Penny are you okay? Did I-”

“Don’t worry, it’s not you. Well it is you technically.” She lightly giggled again. “I’m just really happy right now, that’s all. Let’s keep going okay?”

Her arms went on either side of his shoulders and wrapped around. Oscar gave the girl what she wanted and went right back to kissing her. She felt warm, very warm. Oscar couldn’t explain it but made him want to touch her more. Before he knew it, Oscar had leaned forward until Penny had no choice but to lay down on the couch and let him hover over him, not that it bothered her one bit. To see him be this into it was exciting to say the least.

The feel of his lips ended again when Oscar had no choice but to catch his breath Penny was ready for him to come back for more but was surprised when his face went past her own. Suddenly her body flinched the moment she felt him kiss and nip at her neck. Now she really didn’t know what to feel! This was something he hadn’t done before but it made her hard to lay still. His teeth gently grazed her until one nip sunk in more than the others.

“Aaa~” a moan finally slipped out from her and Penny quickly covered her mouth while Oscar stopped to look at her, also surprised. He honestly wasn’t sure if that was going to do anything for her. Apparently it did.

“You good?” He smirked.

Penny nodded and uncovered her mouth. “I don’t think I’ve ever made that sound before.”

“Well...today is going to be full of it hopefully.” Oscar grabbed the bottom of his orange shirt and pulled it over his head, freeing him from the stuffy fabric.

Penny only watched from underneath him. It was hard to believe when they first met that he was shorter than her and tiny. Now he was 5’10 and had a physique of an expert huntsman. His shoulders had gotten broad and there was practically no fat on him. His chest widened out and he was cut! Ruby had compared him to a pro swimmer before. His skin had gathered a handful of scars over the years. A couple along his torso and a few more faded ones on his arms. She was pretty sure there was more on his back too. Him and Jaune were almost the same bulk. It made her wonder if Jaune had looked like Oscar at fourteen. That thought was interrupted when the feeling of his fingertips went across her collarbone and down to the first bottom of her shirt. He had kept his gloves on for some reason but honestly, Penny thought it was pretty attractive. Ruby has clearly influenced her taste.

It only took a few seconds for Oscar to unbutton her shirt completely.

“Woah...” Oscar said without thinking.

He hadn’t noticed earlier but she wasn’t wearing a bra like usual, probably so he wouldn’t fumble with it. Today really was planned. That didn’t make seeing Penny’s bare chest any less of a hurdle. They were somewhere in the middle of Weiss and Ruby’s, but perkier. Not to mention her nipples were real pink and a little puffy.

Penny could feel his stare on her and it made her turn her head to the side. Something about it made it really hard to think and breathe a little heavier, which only made Oscar more turned on. It didn’t help that she was technically still in his shirt and the necklace he just gave her dangled around her neck.

“You’re breathtaking…”

His words made her face feel hot and ears red. “Can you not stare too much? It’s embarra-ahhh!”

Oscar’s hands gently grabbed the orbs and massaged them as he bent down and started kissing her stomach, scattered with freckles.

His kisses were slow and deliberate. Causing Penny to moan or gasp anytime his tongue pressed against her before his lips sucked on that spot as he made his way down her now arching body.

“Oscar…” was all she could manage to moan. How was he so good at this? Was he good, or was she a lightweight like Ruby had described to her? She just knew she liked this feeling. It was easy to understand why people talked up sex, why Oscar was so clearly eager despite not telling her directly. Her eyes shut tightly every time his thumbs methodically traced around her nipples, causing her to suck air in through her teeth. The fact this was foreplay only made Penny more excited for the main part.

Finally she was given a moment to relax. Penny propped herself up with one forearm to see Oscar unbuckle her shorts. Penny raised her hips up again for him to pull the fabric off, flinging it on the ground. Despite the flannel, she only had frilly pink panties on now that had become more than a little damp. Oscar thought now would be a good time to remove his own pants. He sat up to undo them but Penny unexpectedly grabbed his wrist. Her face at waist level to him as she was on her hands and knees, while Oscar rested on his knees.

“Let me.” She said in a voice that Oscar couldn’t begin to describe, but it made him gulp. Penny’s nimble fingers made quick work of the button and purposely slow work of the zipper. Oscar lifted one leg up at a time for her to pull his pants off. Now they were more or less in the same boat in terms of nudity. Penny couldn’t help but stare at the bulge in her boyfriend’s dark blue boxers. She reached out to touch it and wasn’t expecting to hear Oscar let out a light groan as it throbbed in her hand. Penny looked up to see Oscar red in the face and avoided eye contact with her.

“Did that...feel good?” She asked, genuinely wondering.

“More than it probably should’ve.” He admitted. “It feels different when...it isn’t me touching it, better.” He added.

“I see, do you...touch yourself often? Penny didn’t know why but asking such questions felt so overwhelming. Her hand gave the clothed shaft a few more gent strokes, earning another groan. Penny didn’t know Oscar’s voice could sound so husky and deep.

“Every so often.” Oscar couldn’t stop his hips from pressing more into Penny’s hand until she hooked his waistband and pulled his boxers down. She let out a little “eep” the moment his manhood sprung out. It was different from textbooks, bigger. Half a foot maybe? It was about as wide though. Penny put her hand around it as much as she could. She wasn’t expecting it to feel so hot, so alive. Her hand started stroking it without even thinking. Again she was rewarded with the sound of Oscar’s voice. Penny really liked that voice. Another personal question came to mind that she couldn’t help but know.

“When you touched yourself, did you think of me?” Her breathing got a little heavy asking that. It was enough to make Oscar twitch and throb even more in her hand.

“Yes!”

Penny had no more questions, nothing else going through her head. Just the reaction to close her eyes and wrap her lips against Oscar’s searing length, gradually sinking her head down it before coming back up to the top, then down again.

“F-Penny!!!” Oscar shouted. He tried his best not to buck his hips but he couldn’t help himself. Penny used her free hand to grab his and rest it on her head. Her tongue slid around his manhood while she picked up the pace. His attempts to stay gentle made her really happy but it was clear to her that Oscar had forgotten something he didn’t have to worry about with her. Penny had a lot of things that made her more human in terms of design, a gag reflex wasn’t one of them.

Every second, Penny could feel him move more and more. All she could taste and smell right now was Oscar and the arousal that leaked out of him. Penny hummed lightly which only Oscar thrust a little harder, turning the hum into more of a moan. It didn’t take long before the sound of Oscar moaning joined the mix of scandalous sounds in the living room.

“Wait Penny, Penny I’m…!!!”

She was too lost in the moment to really register his plea. A couple of moments later and she felt Oscar grip her head especially tight, his body tensing up as he came. The taste from earlier had suddenly gotten a lot more potent. Penny’s eyes widened as ropes of seed were shot into her mouth. Still, she kept sucking just a little longer just to make sure nothing spilled out when she finally removed herself from him. Unsurprisingly, he was still hard. Ruby had told her that it was pretty common for young men to recover in no time at all, especially if they’re pent up.

Penny sat on her knees and looked up at Oscar, who had gotten a little sweaty and was breathing heavy. She was feeling pretty proud of herself right now.

Oscar had a million feelings right now and didn’t know exactly where to start. “That was… really good.” He huffed. “Let me get you a napkin so you can spit-” Oscar saw Penny gulp down his cum right before he could finish his sentence. If he wasn’t hard and blushing before, that would’ve done it.

“Sorry, what were you saying?” Penny said, still chipper about what just happened.

“Nothing, just…that won’t mess anything up internally will it?”

“Oscar if I can eat food then I can swallow.” She said, grabbing her drink on the small table next to them to wash down whatever might’ve remained in her mouth.

It was hard to argue with that logic. Penny wouldn’t do anything that would compromise herself anyways, he hoped. She did like magnets after all.

Penny put the cup back down next to their untouched food and wrapped her arms around Oscar again. She pulled herself back onto his lap to get a kiss that had somehow gotten more feverish than last time. Oscar’s hands went immediately to her soft and plump rear, grasping it firmly before pinning Penny underneath him again. This was good, she really wanted him to take the lead on this one. The way his erection poked at her inner thighs told Penny she didn’t have much of an option to begin with.

Oscar slid his right hand up her leg and under the then layer of fabric she had left to touch her soaked lips directly. The hold she had on him tightened while she gasped into their kiss. He kept trailing up and down his slit until his middle finger barely pierced her entrance. The heat and grip surrounding the digit was enough on its own to make Oscar shiver.

“I wanted to return the favor of going down on you, but I don’t think I can wait.” He groaned, centimeters from her ear.

“I’m perfectly fine with that. I want you inside of me.” Penny lifted her hips again. Her panties came off faster even than her shorts did, Oscar practically tossed them across the room, making her giggle. She liked this side of him. He was still caring but also very assertive in a way that was new to her.

Penny let out another moan as she felt his length rub against her. Oscar locked eyes with her and gave her a quick peck on the lips.

“This way you don’t have to worry about me staring too much.” He joked. “I love you Penny Polendina.”

Her hand gently reached to grab her new necklace, her other and rubbing the side of his face. “I love you too, Oscar Pine.” She returned the chaste kiss, which quickly turned into a passionate one. Penny bent her knees more and spread her legs wider as Oscar began sliding into her hot entrance. She shut her eyes and moaned deeply, his manhood only a few inches in.

“Go slow please!” Penny gasped. Her body felt weird, but also really good. There was also a slight mixture of pressure that gave her a little discomfort as she was slowly being spread open. Penny could still feel pain after all. If you wanted to experience something good then you had to accept the possible flip side. That was good though. Pleasure, pain, good taste, bad taste, having the full range was ideal; it was normal.

Oscar did his best to go slowly. The way she coiled around him with such heat made him want to lose composure so badly, but he fought the urge. It took a minute before he was finally completely inside of her. Oscar took her left hand then interlocked their fingers. He had never seen Penny look winded before. It was...kinda cute.

“Are you okay?”

“Sen...sational” she giggled, out of breath. It had been awhile since she said that. “You can move when you're ready.”

“You sure?”

“Positive”

Oscar kissed her forehead. “I’ll start off slow.”

“Thank you…” Penny felt so weak right now and she didn’t know how to explain it. All she knew was it felt great. Not only that, being with Oscar like this made her happier than she could’ve imagined.

Oscar carefully started to pull out to the very tip before sinking back into Penny’s depth, making both groan all over again, again, and again. It didn’t take too long for Oscar to get to a rhythm of rocking his hips into Penny. Any pain started to subside and leave pleasure in Penny’s wake as she held onto Oscar by having her arms around his body. Oscar could feel Penny dig in a little into his back the more she moaned and got lost in the moment.

“Faster…” She finally moaned. Oscar didn’t delay in giving her what she wanted, what they wanted. His hips picked up the tempo until the couch started to creak from their love making. Any thought about controlling her moans were thrown out the window. Penny couldn’t resist moaning his name with every thrust that struck her deep inside. The only time noise went down was when the two kissed deeply.

Oscar brought her left leg up and around his lower back, while the right one dangled off the couch. This change in position brought Oscar even deeper than before; to the point Penny’s body arched again, rubbing against his.

“Gods Oscar!” She moaned, “You’re so deep” Penny found herself trying to sync up with Oscar’s rhythm, finding it the moment he grazed a new spot within her wall that made the spasm and Oscar bite down on her neck again.

“You’re so tight. So...ahhh! Penny!” Oscar couldn’t think straight. He could only keep rutting into her like a beast in heat. The apartment echoed the sounds of him slamming into her. It was a good thing he had aura, Oscar might’ve gotten a bruise otherwise. They found themselves staying like this for several minutes. Touching, tasting, hearing the intoxicating pleasure the other was making. As if it was the only thing that would sustain them. If it were up to them, this moment would’ve lasted forever, but neither of them could resist the intense urge building inside of them.

Oscar sat up and grabbed Penny’s hips, stabilizing the both of them as he continued to pump into her. He couldn’t help but stare at the womanhood that enveloped his length. The sight of her arousal covering and dripping off of his length only shortened his fuse. Oscar wanted to cum so badly but not alone. His thumb slid closer inward and started grazing her clit every time he thrusted into her. It gave him the results he was looking for. Penny started gripping the couch cushions and her voice started to get even more pleading.

“Oscar~!!! It’s too much!” She whimpered.

His own limits were finally reaching their end. “Cum Penny! Cum whenever you feel like it.” A thin layer of sweat started to coat Oscar as he tried prolonging the inevitable. “Fuck I’m so close!”

The pressure inside Penny just kept building and building like a knot that kept going pulled tighter. Until finally…

“OSCAR!” Penny felt that knot snap. Her walls mercilessly gripped Oscar with a grip that made him cave in at last, erupting rope after rope inside of her. She felt each one and made her shiver. Penny’s face went completely red. She couldn’t imagine the amount Oscar came. It was more than earlier! Oscar’s body finally came down from the adrenaline and he fell right next to her, thoroughly exhausted. Another thing Penny didn’t have to worry much about. Granted she was a little tired, but could easily be active for days on end still.

The girl looked at her tired boyfriend and rubbed his face. “You okay?”

“Happy Anniversary” he chuckled. Penny did the same and kissed his lips quickly.

“I’m gonna get dressed, put the food up for later, and then we can cuddle here?”

“I don’t deserve you. You’re so wonderful.”

“Not as wonderful as you are. Seriously, thanks for accepting me for me, but also still be willing to accept more of me. Letting me grow, change, and try to feel more...you know.”

“I will always support any version of you that you want to become. Forever and always. My other half.”

“My soulmate.” She rubbed her fingers through his hair as he started to doze off a little. Penny happily hummed and got up to clean.

Oscar laid comfortably on the couch. The presence of Ozpin slowly returning before he fell too deep into sleep.

“Good job. Personally I would’ve used the bed conveniently in the other room but hey, things happen fast.”

“Please tell me you weren’t watching all that?” Oscar groaned.

“Of course not, I believe in privacy. It’s not my fault you’re replaying what just happened. It’s kinda unavoidable, sorry.”

“I don’t care, I just can’t believe it went so well”

“I can, muscle memory remember? This might’ve been your first time but you have a massive pool of prior knowledge. Completely blowing it wasn’t gonna happen. I told you good luck for confidence.”

“How’d you know this would happen? Prior knowledge?”

“Oscar, it could be a faunus, human, android, or Salem, certain cues from women just do not change. I saw it coming a mile away.”

Oscar yawned and sunk deeper into the couch. “I guess it pays to be immortal. You know a lot.”

“A blessing and a curse. Like I know for a fact there’s no way Pietro approved or even knows about this scheme, or whatever upgrades she got for this occasion.”

Oscar’s eyes opened back up. There was no way Oz was wrong was wrong about that. If Oscar wasn’t tired, he’d be freaking out. Instead he simply closed his eyes again.

“I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.”

xxxx

Ruby laid on Jaune’s bare chest in bed as she went through her scroll during the movie they were supposed to be watching. Their clothes were scattered everywhere and they couldn’t be happier.

“Hey, I got a text from Penny. Looks like the plan worked.”

“Good for them.” Jaune said, playing with her hair. “Pietro is gonna murder him for sure.”

“Good thing you boost aura and healing.”

“Oh, so that’s your grand scheme. Hey, I’m happy to serve.”

“Yeah you are.” She puts down her scroll and straddles Jaune. “Think you can serve me at least one more time?” She took the remote away and smiled.

Jaune couldn’t help but smile too and flip her over to be on top. “I’m always up for your schemes” the two kissed and enjoyed their time together.