#he gives a whole week for every assignment and is always open for consultations n shit

[ii-zi]

No depressing vents/terrible medical updates tonight!!! I'm actually in a v good mood jsjsjs

[watchmegetobsessed]

WILDEST FANTASIES (part 6)

⚫️A/N: so i am actually the biggest idiot to ever exist and managed to do the shit i swore i would never do again but here i go... i fucking deleted the original post to part 6 that i posted 2 days ago so... i am actually crying right now, like for real bc it was almost at 500 notes and now its all gone along with the feedbacks so... yeah. i will not expect to reach that number again but if you see this post and like the series pls just at least give this post a like😥

⚫️PAIRING: Professor!Harry X Reader

⚫️WARNING: sexual content

⚫️WORD COUNT: 5.3k

SERIES MASTERPOST

The end of the semester is always the busiest period for both teachers and students. All the promises to start studying in time catch up, libraries and coffee shops get filled and crowded, all assignments seem to be due the same week and the exams are warningly close. Everyone is desperate to get the best grades they can, earn some extra points and credits, fighting hard to end the semester on the best possible note.

Harry doesn’t necessarily like Starbucks, but that’s what’s closest to the building where his office is at and he had only ten minutes to get something extra strong to keep him going for the rest of the day. The place is packed, every table is taken and most of them have students with the laptops open in front of them sitting around them, books and papers piling as they work through months’ worth of materials.

“Double espresso for Harry?” the barista calls out and Harry snaps out of his thoughts, stepping closer to the counter.

“Thank you,” he hums, taking the paper cup from the guy. He doesn’t add any sugar or cream, he is in desperate need to taste the bitterness hoping it would shake him up even more than the caffeine.

He slaloms past the waiting people and finally makes it outside, heading back to his office. He has had students coming in and out, begging for extra tasks to save their asses after doing absolutely nothing all semester. In addition, he’s been having endless consultations with his PhD students and seniors writing their thesis as they are nearing their deadlines as well. It’s been a busy few days.

So busy that he hasn’t been able to see you since the gala, only in class.

He spent most of those ninety minutes sitting at his desk, because you had the nerve to wear the shortest skirt to ever exist with thigh-high boots that definitely gave him a few new fantasies. One of them was fucking you in nothing but the boots. When you uncrossed your legs underneath the desk and he caught sight of your red underwear, he was just about to spank you right in front of the whole class. He knows you noticed how riled up he got and you enjoyed every bit of it as your underwear got wetter by the minute as well.

He wanted to at least have a word with you after class, but three students were at his desk the moment he dismissed everyone and you had to run as well. It’s been pure torture, especially after the kiss you shared at the gala.

He’s been jerking off daily to your writings. Not his proudest achievement for sure, but he simply can’t contain himself and you’re on his mind all the time. Now that Niall has gone back to Ireland, the house is fully his and he doesn’t have to worry about moaning your name in the shower when he is wanking off to the thought of you.

His new favorite thing? Texting you every time he thought of you when he touched himself and you’ve been loving it probably way too much you should. Knowing that you’re all he can think about, it’s the biggest boost to your ego.

By the time Harry gets back to his office, students are already waiting for him, giving him no time to have just a breather. For the next couple of hours, he is too busy to even reply to your latest text, buried under assignments waiting to be graded, begging students keeping him up all the time, his colleagues dropping by with questions as well.

Day turns into night and he only realizes how late it has gotten when his stomach growls from hunger. That sandwich he ate six hours ago is long gone, he is famished. His phone starts ringing right when he is about to start packing up and a smile spreads across his face upon seeing the caller ID.

“Hey, are you still in your office?” you murmur softly from the other end of the call.

“Was just about to leave, why?”

“I just finished at the library, I have a little bit of time before I plan to get back to studying. Maybe I could drop by?” you suggest shyly, hoping you’re not crossing any boundaries. “I’m in front of the building.”

“Alright, my door is open,” he smiles softly.

About five minutes later, there’s a soft knock on his door, he calls out and looks up just when you walk into the office. You’re wearing a pair of black jeans and a light blue, knitted sweater, you look a little tired, but he still thinks you’re stunning.

“I brought food. Are you hungry?” you smile, holding up a bag of Chinese food and Harry could drop to his knees at the sight of it.

“Yes! Come on, sit down,” he gestures for you to sit on the sofa while he pulls a chair closer, he sits on that so you can pack the food out next to you.

Normally, he would already be kissing the life out of you at this point. Seeing you alone, not in a crowded class room, he’s been aching for this moment for days, and now that it’s here, he feels so tired and hungry, so fed up with work in the past days that he would rather just sit with you, even if it’s in complete silence. There’s something in your presence that calms him, takes his mind off of work.

“This is fucking lifesaving,” he groans when he finally digs into the food.

“Actually, I saw that the lights were still on when I finished at the library, went to grab the food and came back. I figured that you haven’t had much time to leave this room today,” you admit with a smirk.

“So you were stalking me?” he teases you, but you just roll your eyes at him. You remain silent for a while before you speak up again.

“Honestly, I wasn’t sure if… you felt the same way.”

“About what?”

“Me.”

His eyes snap up to meet yours and he notices how you’re anxiously fidgeting with your chopsticks, the version of you that oozes confidence now hidden somewhere deep inside you. Placing his food to the side he slips off of the chair until he is kneeling in front of you. He grabs your knees and pushes them apart so he can push himself between your legs. Taking your food box he puts it aside as well, his hands cupping your face. He runs his thumb across your lower lip and can’t help but smirk when you inhale shakily at his touch.

“I still can’t stop thinking about you, Y/N. And I think you know how badly I want you just from the texts I’ve been sending you whenever I can’t control my want for you.”

“I love those texts,” you whisper, licking your lips and your tongue touches his thumb in the motion.

“Yeah?” he chuckles softly.

“I love knowing that you think about me, because I do the same.”

“You think about me when you touch yourself?”

“Always,” you gasp as he leans closer and presses a kiss to your cheek first, then moving down your jawline and neck. His lips finally move to yours, kissing you fiercely, but it doesn’t last as long as you’d want. Pulling back your eyes meet his dark stare as he stands up and strides over to the door. He locks it before turning around and walking over to you, standing tall next to his chair.

“Show me,” he tells you and your breath hitches in your throat.

“What?”

“I want to see you touch yourself. Show me how you do it when you’re thinking about me.”

All blood rushes into your head and you can feel your cheeks heating. You’re not sure what you’re supposed to do, no one has asked such thing from you and you have no idea how to do it without making yourself look like a fool.

Harry senses your hesitance, reaching out he cups your jaw in a hand and leaning down he kisses you hard, his tongue clashing with yours in an instant.

“I won’t ask again, Y/N. Do it,” he growls against your lips, before standing up straight again, staring down at you.

“Don’t you want to do more than just watching?” you ask out of breath.

“Everything in its own time.”

So he wants to take his time with you. You could have guessed that he won’t just have a quickie with you and that just makes you want him even more.

Leaning back on the sofa, you take your sweater off, wearing only a white tank top underneath, before your hands move to unbutton your pants. Originally, you were planning to just reach into your pants and underwear, but Harry has other plans.

“Take your pants off,” he tells you and you shiver at how demanding he sounds, taking full control over the situation.

Obeying you tug your pants down your legs and off of yourself, leaving you in only your white underwear that’s already soaking wet just from the way he is staring down at you. Keeping eye-contact, you move your hand over to your clothes cunt as you start running two fingers over yourself, teasing and working yourself up for more. Harry’s eyes are glued to your hand between your legs and when you peek down at his pants, you see that he is hard, like at the gala.

“Spread your legs more,” he tells you, and you do it without a second thought, exposing yourself even more to his greedy eyes.

When you’ve made sure your underwear is drenched, you move your hand underneath the fabric, finally touching your wet skin, moving your fingers between your folds before you start rubbing on your clit.

“How does it feel?” he asks in a low, raspy tone.

“Feels good, but it would be better if you did it,” you moan, desperate to feel his touch. Though it’s extremely hot how he is watching you pleasing yourself, it would be better if he was joining in on the fun.

“Patience. Now dip those pretty fingers into yourself for me.”

Sucking in your breath you push two fingers inside of yourself, curling them before pulling them out and then pushing back in, picking a nice rhythm to do it over and over again. One of Harry’s hands moves to his crotch and you can’t help but moan when he palms himself, still staring at you.

“You look so beautiful, Y/N. All spread out in front of me, pleasing yourself. I could watch you all day long.” He squeezes himself over his pants again and you’re just about to whine and beg for him to touch you when he drops to his knees and grabbing your wrist he pulls your hand away from you, only to tug your underwear off of you with a swift movement, baring you completely in front of his greedy eyes.

“I need to taste you,” he breathes out, his fingers digging into your inner thighs as he keeps the spread wide.

First, he kisses your left thigh, very close to your cunt, then he kisses the same spot on your right thigh and as he locks his eyes with you, he dives right in. With open mouthed kisses and relentless sucking, he is quick to absolutely light you on fire. Your hands grab onto his curls and you can’t stop yourself from grinding against his face as he eats you out as if you were his last meal.

He could do this for a living, that’s how good he is. The way he uses his tongue and lips, how he knows just the right rhythm for you to get closer and closer to your orgasm faster than ever. He was born to eat pussy. Your pussy.

“Fuck! I’m gonna come!” you gasp, your back arching from the sensation. One of his hands moves from your thigh up your abdomen underneath your tank top, the touch of his hand on your naked feels intoxicating and when he gropes your breast, you wish all your clothes were gone and you could feel him all over you.

“Go on, want to taste it. Come on my face, Y/N,” he tells you and you’re basically seeing stars at this point.

He could have made you come just by his mouth, but suddenly, he pushes two fingers inside you, stretching you out, feeling you up before he starts pumping, his mouth still on your clit.

It takes only a few minutes for you to come, whimpering and moaning in pleasure, your orgasm washing over your body in tidal waves and you’re drowning in it. Drowning in him.

His actions soften and his hands move to your thighs, gently massaging them as you try to regulate your breathing again, coming off your high. Pressing a few soft kisses to your sensitive clit he sits back to his heels, a smug grin spread across his face as he gently rubs your thighs. You’re still completely exposed in front of him, but you couldn’t care less, you want this man’s face between your legs every waking moment for the rest of your life.

“This was better than the Chinese,” he jokes and you let out an airy chuckle. Then you see how hard he still is and you push yourself forward with the intention of returning the mind-blowing favor, but he grabs your wrist and pushes your hands away from him. “Not now. I want you to eat, you said you didn’t have much time.”

“But I have enough time to suck you off, I can eat on my way too.”

“No,” he shakes his head. “You’ll have the chance to do that another time, I’m perfectly fine with what I got now.” Leaning closer he kisses you before grabbing your underwear and pants from the floor beside him.

A little disappointed, but you get dressed and you both return to eating. Harry asks you about your upcoming exams and papers, he seems mesmerized by what people in other majors do.

“I’m as far from math as possible,” he chuckles, digging into his food, this time sitting next to you on the small sofa, his body pressed up against yours and he has pulled your legs across his lap.

“I can tutor you,” you chuckle.

“Yeah? Reversed roles? Sounds interesting,” he grins and leaning closer he kisses your shoulder before you both keep eating.

Your time together flies by way too fast and you have to be on your way too soon. You know you have to leave, you promised Kostas you’d help him study for his statistics exam, but you’d rather stay with Harry. Unfortunately, he has loads of work to do as well.

“Thanks for dropping by,” Harry hums as you’re about to leave.

“I just wish we had more time,” you smile at him coyly and stepping closer you wrap your arms around his neck, his hands finding your waist in an instant.

“How about the weekend?” he suggests. “You could spend it at mine if you want.”

“That sounds great,” you grin and if you’re being honest, you were hoping he would offer it. You didn’t want to be too pushy and bring it up yourself. “I can pack a bag and stay for the night.”

“Don’t bring too many clothes, you won’t be wearing them,” he smirks before kissing you.

When you’re out the door, Harry gathers his stuff as well and grabs all the empty food boxes after your feast and finally heads out as well. Just as he is locking the office up, Professor Alvarez appears at the end of the hallway, seemingly on her way home as well.

“Harry! Hi! Doing some extra hours?” she asks, absolutely no clue about what just went down in his office not long ago.

“Uhh, yeah! Same goes for you?” he asks politely as they start walking down the hallway towards the stairs.

“Yeah, my students like to take advantage of my kindness and turn in everything after the last minute,” she chuckles. “Wow, that’s a lot of food, did you eat all of that on your own?” she asks, pointing at the trash Harry is carrying.

“Oh, I… I did. But not at once,” he adds clearing his throat. “I’ve been hoarding it up and now I’m getting rid of it.”

“Ah, I see,” she smiles. “Hey, I wanted to ask what you’re doing this weekend. One of my friends is having a get together and I think you’d enjoy it, they told me to bring someone and I thought you could be my plus one, I guess.”

It’s more than just a friendly invitation. Nina Alvarez has been into Harry for a while not, but the man is either extremely oblivious to her attempts at seducing him, or he is just great at ignoring it. Either way, one thing is for sure: Harry is not interested in Nina as more than just friends, while the freshly divorced woman is determined to get closer to the school’s hottest professor.

“That sounds great, but… I already have plans with a friend,” he mumbles apologetically.

“Oh, no worries,” she smiles, but he notices the blush on her cheeks.

They chit-chat about mostly work until they reach the parking lot and part ways, both of them heading to their own car.

Arriving home that day you find Kostas sitting at the kitchen island with his books and notebooks spread out in front of him, the screen of his laptop illuminating his strong features. The stubble he has grown these past days makes him look older and much manlier, he should keep it longer, you think.

“Hey! Sorry I’m a bit late, just give me a minute to change and we can start,” you huff, kicking your boots off.

“Sure, I’ll be here,” he sighs, rubbing his face with his hands.

“Ramona?” you ask, seeing that her bedroom door is closed, she only has it closed when Dean is over but she didn’t mention that he was coming over.

“Oh, she’s been on the phone with Dean, but… I think they are having a fight,” he whispers in case she can hear him.

“What happened?”

“I don’t know, she hasn’t said a thing and I think they are still talking.”

“I hope everything is okay. Dean has been away often lately, right?”

“I heard her talking about his dad the other day,” Kostas says. “I think he’s been going home to help his parents out, but I have no idea what’s really behind it.”

You don’t know much about Dean, you only hang out with him when Ramona brings him along, but that’s perfectly fine with you. As far as you know, his parents are a bit older, already in their sixties. Dean was a late surprise child, he has two sisters that are twelve and fifteen years older than him. If what Kostas said is true, you’re hoping his parents are doing well and it has nothing to do with their age or health.

“She’ll tell us if she is ready,” you sigh, not wanting to get your nose into something that’s none of your business. “Okay, so, let’s see that task sheet!” you clap your hands, joining him at the kitchen island.

It’s past midnight when you go to bed. You practiced with Kostas for hours and then worked on one of your own assignments as well, time flew by faster than you could realize. After a hot shower, you make yourself comfortable in bed, scrolling a bit on your phone when a notification of a message pops up on the screen.

HARRY: Thinking about you.

You sigh happily as you reread those three words over and over again before typing in your response.

Y/N: I knew I should have returned the favor!

His reply comes only moments later.

HARRY: I’m not touching myself, just thinking about you.

“Fuck, you are venturing to dangerous territories, professor,” you sigh, as you answer his text.

Y/N: You’re gonna make me swoon, professor.

HARRY: Good. That was my intention. Now go to sleep, you’ve had a tiring day.

Y/N: Good night, dream of me Xx

HARRY: Always.

Grinning like an idiot, you plug your phone to the charger and drop it to your nightstand and staring up at the ceiling as you replay what happened in his office today over and over again, how his hands felt on your skin, his lips on your throbbing clit, the way his fingers fit inside you so perfectly… you can’t wait to feel his hard cock in your pussy already and hopefully, it’s gonna happen this weekend.

Your phone lights up with another text and grabbing it you see it’s from Harry again.

HARRY: Alright, I’m touching myself too.

Y/N: Can’t wait to do it for you Xx

You place your phone back to the nightstand with the screen facing down and force yourself to sleep, even though all you can think about his Harry with his hand wrapped around his hard cock as he lies in his bed right now, thinking about you.

Packing for the weekend at Harry’s you feel like a little kid going to camp. You dig through your whole closet to find the best pieces even though you have a feeling he didn’t joke about not bringing too many clothes. You even stuff your matching lingerie set you haven’t had the chance to wear since buying, knowing that he will definitely appreciate the red lacy set.

Ramona is spending the weekend at Dean’s and Kostas is planning to spend most of Saturday and Sunday at the library, he barely notices anything when he gets home after a full day of studying. You agreed with Harry that you’d head over on Saturday afternoon since you still have some studying to do and Harry has work, it’s the best you can do. But you’ll have the rest of Saturday and the whole of Sunday together to do… whatever you want.

You can barely hold your excited smile back as you finally leave and head to Harry’s place. Last time you were there you left your new little writing on his car hoping to convince him to give it a chance and now here you are, spending the night at his, most likely getting railed like never before.

It worked out at the end.

You keep fantasizing about everything you want to do with Harry, or more like what you want him to do to you, and by the time you’re walking up the stairs to his front door, you’re ready to jump out of your skin and get down to business straight away. You ring the doorbell and when he opens the door you take a deep breath seeing him in a pair of grey sweatpants and a black shirt, he has shaved since the last time you saw him and the grin on his face is as wide as yours.

Without saying a word you step closer to him and kiss him as a greeting, wrapping your arms around his neck while he circles his around your waist lifting you up from the ground as he kisses you back.

“Hey,” you finally say, smiling against his lips.

“Hi, happy to see me?”

“Would be happier if you were naked already, but I guess, yeah?”

He chuckles, putting you back to your feet as he loosens his hold around you, taking your bag you dropped to jump into his arms.

“So eager, huh?” He smirks, ushering you inside and closing the door behind you.

“Can you blame me? I feel like we’ve been foreplaying for weeks, I’m losing patience,” you admit laughing. Leaning closer he kisses you shortly, walking you further inside. He drops your bag into the bedroom before you both walk into the kitchen and you notice the bottle of wine on the counter with two glasses, along with quite a few ingredients lined up, like he was about to start cooking.

“I hope you can wait just a bit more, because I’m making dinner first.”

“Why don’t we do it after?” you suggest, but he just shakes his head chuckling.

“I want you fed and full of energy for everything I have planned for tonight,” he murmurs as he leans closer and kisses the corner of your mouth. He is such a gentleman, so mature and caring, nothing like guys your age. None of your previous hookups cared about whether you’ve eaten or not, this is something new and definitely an upgrade.

“Alright, what can I help with?” you smile, assessing everything laid out on the counter.

“Why don’t you start with pouring some wine?” he smiles and you’re more than happy to put yourself into use.

As much as you wanted to jump his bones the minute you walked into the house, it’s so nice to spend time with him with your clothes still on. You’ve had an image of him in your head based on what you’ve seen from him in school, but that’s just a fracture of what he is.

You watch him move around the kitchen, he even put an apron on and if it’s possible, he just looks even better like this. You try to help him, but he just keeps telling you to drink your wine and keep him company.

“Are you going home for Christmas?” you ask, refilling his glass. He is stirring the sauce in the pan, keeps tasting it to know what else he needs to add. Chef Harry is fucking hot.

“Yeah, I don’t get to go home often, so I like to spend the holidays with my family. My mom is always so happy to have everyone together. I usually come back on January 2nd.”

“I bet it’s really nice,” you smile, but there’s bitterness behind your words and slight jealousy.

“Are you going home?”

“Um… not sure yet,” you purse your lips. Ever since your grandmother’s passing, you haven’t found your place during the holidays. The first year, you spent it with your mom and her boyfriend at that time, but it was catastrophic. Next year your grandma’s sister invited to spend it with her and her family and though you don’t have bad blood with that part of your family, you haven’t had the tightest relationship with them either, so it felt like you were an intruder. That year all you got from your mom was a text. Not even a call.

Last year Kostas wanted you to go home to Greece with him to his family, and though it was an incredibly nice gesture, you didn’t want to bother his time with his family, so you ended up staying back here. You have a feeling the same thing will happen this year as well.

“What do you mean? You’re not sure if your family comes here or you’re going home?”

“No, I’m… not sure if I’ll go anywhere.”

Harry looks at you still confused.

“You don’t want to see your family?”

“I don’t really have family. I’m not on the best terms with my mom, never knew my dad. I was closest to my grandma but she passed away a few years ago.”

“Fuck, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up the painful stuff.”

“It’s alright,” you smile at him reassuring him that he didn’t do anything wrong.

“So… you just stay here alone?”

“It’s not as bad as it sounds,” you chuckle awkwardly, though you know it sounds pathetic, spending the holidays alone.

He doesn’t answer, but something is definitely on his mind, keeping it to himself. You move to lighter topics as he puts on some water to boil for the pasta and finish up the sauce, while you keep eyeing him up and down, moving around in the kitchen like a pro.

“Alright, now we just have to wait for the pasta and we can eat,” he smiles, turning the stove off under the sauce.

Taking another sip from your drink you place it to the counter before walking over to him, hooking your thumbs into the string of his apron that runs around his waist.

“I have a few ideas what we can do while we wait for that,” you suggest, pressing a kiss to his lips.

“Mm, really? Tell me about them,” he smirks.

“I would rather show you.”

Kissing him deeper, you palm him through his pants and he groans against your lips, already hardening under your touch.

“It’s gonna take just ten minutes for it to be done,” he reminds you and you take it as a challenge.

“Then I better be fast.”

Dropping to your knees you’re quick to tug his pants and boxer briefs, freeing his half-hard cock, seeing it for the first time ever uncovered. His size, even though you’ve seen it through his clothes, is impressive and for a moment you doubt if it’s gonna fit inside you, but you can only hope for the best. For now, you only have to take in your mouth as much as you can.

Wrapping your hands around him, you give it a few pumps as you look up so your eyes meet and you see that he is staring down at you with so much lust and want. You lick up his length before wrapping your lips around the head, pumping him a few more times to get him nice and hard and ready for you.

Taking a deep breath you start moving your head, taking in as much of him as possible, the head touching the back of your throat before pulling back. You start bobbing your head and pumping the base you can’t take into your mouth, focusing to keep a steady rhythm in your motions.

“Fuck,” he breathes out, his hands gathering your hair and then keeping it in one, tugging in it lightly and it gives your scalp a tingle.

The water on the stove is bubbling and it pairs with Harry’s heavy breathing as you keep moving relentlessly, your mouth completely full of him every time you take him in. Your eyes start watering when you try to take more and more of his cock, your jaw is hurting, but nothing can stop you.

“You look so beautiful with your mouth full of my cock, fuck,” he groans and starts buckling his hips to meet your movements. You’re almost taking his full length now, gagging when the head pushes down your throat, but the sight of him enjoying himself is worth everything. You move a hand to his balls and start massaging them, earning a long moan from him as he holds onto your hair even tighter.

“Fuck, you’re gonna make me cum,” he warns you, gasping for air, so you just suck it up and deep throat him several times in a row, your hands working on his balls.

He whimpers your name and you suck on him harder when you pull back and take him in again, a moment later his cock jerks in your mouth, his hot cum shooting to the back of your throat. You milk him well, taking every drop of his cum and swallowing without hesitation.

Harry helps you up to your feet and cradles your face in his hands, kissing you hard and passionate, not even caring that you had his dick in your mouth just a moment ago.

“That was…” he breathes out, leaning his forehead against yours.

“That was my appetizer,” you joke, making him laugh before he kisses you again and pulls his pants and underwear up, tugging his softening dick away before turning to check the food.

“Pasta is ready,” he smirks.

NEXT PART

Thank you for reading! Please like and reblog if you enjoyed!

[purplegirlstory]

Forget Me Not

You've been in love with Jaehyun for as long as you can remember. You first met him during your freshman year in high school and he was this charming boy with cute dimples that every teacher seems to compliment. You both became friends when the teacher assigned the seating plan for the class and he happened to be your deskmate. 

"Hi! I'm Jaehyun. Jung Jaehyun. Nice to meet you" Jaehyun smiled at you as soon as he sat on the chair beside you. You shyly smiled at him and nodded your head.

"Y-Y/N..." you said before turning your head to face the teacher in front.

It was the summer before your second year when Jaehyun decided to join the basketball team in your school to become a varsity player. He would always invite you during his practices and you would always make sure that you can attend as many practice games as you can. Well.... you are in love with the boy so of course, you wouldn't say no to him. 

"Y/N! How did I do? Were you able to count all my 3-point shots?" Jaehyun smirked at you while grabbing the towel at your hand and wiping his face with it. 

"With those shoots Jae, I'm pretty sure you'll be able to join the varsity team in no time!" you cheered, handing him the water bottle after he was done wiping his face.

And he did. Jaehyun was able to join the varsity team and was able to compete with teams from other schools. Not only that, but Jaehyun become popular as the "Dimpled Guy" who plays basketball. Even girls from other schools would come to watch his game just to see how handsome he is whenever he is playing basketball. 

It was Valentine's Day when you arrived in your classroom and saw your desk full of chocolates and flowers. It wasn't for you. It was all for Jaehyun.

"We can share them" a voice behind said and you turned around and saw Jaehyun looking at the flowers and chocolates as well. "I can't finish them all, you know" he laughed nervously while scratching the back of his neck. 

"Of course, Jae! But I get all the vanilla flavored-ones" you laughed with him.

It was in your third year in high school when Jaehyun became the captain of your school's basketball team. It was also the time when a girl named Naeun from another school confessed to Jaehyun in the party that your classmates threw for Jaehyun. 

"Y/N!....Y/N!" you were minding your own business, finishing the can of beer that was in front of you that was sitting there from the time that you arrived at the party. You turned your head around to look for the voice that was yelling your name. You regretted your action when you saw Jaehyun walking towards you with a big smile on his face while holding the hand of a girl behind him.

"Y/N..." Jaehyun smiled shyly looking at the girl behind him the looking back at you. "This is Naeun. Sh-She's my girlfriend". You blinked at the girl behind him before putting on the biggest fake smile you could ever muster. 

"J-Jaehyun....Congratulations" you said before standing up, making sure to place your hand at the table to balance yourself. You bid goodbye to them both before rushing out of the house. 

It was also that night when you experienced unbearable pain in your chest. You ran in your bathroom and kneeled before the toilet. You started coughing violently when you felt something soft and smooth tickling your throat. You held tightly at the edge of the toilet when you started vomiting blood. Only it wasn't only blood, you noticed small blue flowers stained with blood floating in your toilet. No...It can't be. You thought to yourself. You've heard of this before. You've heard of people vomiting flowers whenever they are in one-sided love. You never really believed them until it happened to you.

"Are you gonna tell him?" Doyoung asked handing banana milk to you. Doyoung is a working student that works in your school library that you met whenever you and Jaehyun would stay late inside the library whenever your exams week is coming up. 

"I don't think that's a good idea. He looks so happy with her. She's his first girlfriend" you took the banana milk and just held onto it.

"Well, vomiting blood and flowers isn't a good idea too" Doyoung scoffed at you. 

"Look! I'll try, ok! Maybe I can get rid of my feelings for him and I'll be ok again" 

It was in your last year in high school when you realized that Jaehyun and Naeun aren't gonna break up any time soon. Everyone can see how in love the two are with each other. It was very hard not to notice it. 

You didn't completely ignore Jaehyun. He was your best friend and first love after all. You just limited your interactions with him thinking that it could help you get rid of your feelings for him but the jealousy you felt whenever you see them both only worsen your condition.

"Jaehyun? What are you doing here?" you looked at the man standing on your porch. "You didn't talk to me for the whole week. I missed you" Jaehyun sighed.

"I'm sorry. I'm just stressed out, you know. There are tons of school works that I need to finish since we're graduating students" you lied. You went to the doctor earlier this week to consult for your disease and what you found out only broke your heart even more. I'm sorry Jaehyun. I just love you, that's all. 

"Naeun was asking for you too. She said she didn't saw you for the whole week. She is worried for you too". Naeun was nice to you and respected the fact that you were Jaehyun's best friend. She was never jealous of you and you can't believe that you both became good friends. How could you steal the man that you love from his girl when she was this kind?

I'd rather hurt myself.

It was your graduation day when you realized that this was gonna be the last time that you'll ever see Jaehyun. 

"Sweetie, congratulations!" your mother hugged you. Aside from Doyoung, your mother knew about your condition and how Jaehyun is involved in it. She knew how much you loved Jaehyun. She saw the way you looked at him whenever Jaehyun was staying overnight at your house. 

"I think someone wants to speak with you" she eyed the person behind and you knew exactly who it was.

"Jaehyun" you said, trying to memorize the face that you love so much.

"Hey, we made it. We are off to a new beginning after this." he smiled at you before pulling you into his arms. Jaehyun was going back to America to continue his studies there. With Naeun. It turns out that they both applied for the same university in America. You wrapped your arms around him and you felt your tears flow down from your eyes. This is it. This is goodbye and a new beginning it is.

It was also that day when you stopped vomiting flowers.

~~~~~~

"Another long test?! I swear that he's gone crazy!" Taeyong yelled out of frustration before plopping down next to you. You laughed at him and poked his cheek. "The lesson isn't even that hard. You're just lazy" you smirked at him and he glared at you. Taeyong was the first friend that you made in college. He was that late student during the first day of class.

You stared at the blank notebook in front of you happily. This was your first day in college and you can't be more excited. The teacher was already done introducing himself and is starting to give an introduction about his subject when suddenly the door burst open revealing a pink-haired boy who looks like he just got lost in the campus...or did he? He was holding a cup of coffee in his left hand and was looking frantically around for an available seat which happened to be the one next to yours. He ran to the seat and placed his coffee next to yours. 

"Great, way to introduce yourself Taeyong" you heard him whisper to himself. He grabbed his coffee and took a long sip and you widen your eyes at him. He noticed your expression and his eyes widen as well.

"This isn't my coffee, is it?" he said. 

"C'mon, I'll treat you in our favorite cafe as a motivation for you to study for our looong test" you emphasized which only made him groan. "I hate you Y/N".

You both arrived at the cafe and asked Taeyong to look for seats while you order your food. You were currently waiting for your turn when someone pushed you from behind. Luckily, you were able to maintain your balance and you turned around to scold the stranger that just pushed you. Instead, you saw a brown-haired boy crouching down and picking up papers that were scattered on the floor. 

"Here, let me help you" you suddenly felt sorry for the boy and helped him. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pus-...Y/N?" Jaehyun stared at you shocked but it turned into a bright smile when he finally recognized you. 

You heard the boy mentioned your name and you stared at him in complete confusion. 

"I'm sorry but...how did you know my name?"

~~~~~~

You were waiting inside the doctor's office nervously fiddling with your fingers. You told your mom about your....disease and she suggested that you visit this doctor who was known in your town for dealing with this kind of disease. The door suddenly opened and the doctor came in.

"Well Ms. Y/N, it seems that you have the Hanahaki disease." that's it. That's the word that you were dreading to hear. Hanahaki Disease 

"But unlike the other Hanahaki diseases, yours is one of the very rare kinds," the doctor said which made you looked up at him.

"Rare kind? What do you mean by that?" you furrowed your eyebrows at him.

"You see, normally when someone has a Hanahaki disease, flowers start to bloom in their lungs until it occupies the whole lungs and the person can't breathe anymore and dies." the doctor said and you stared at him in fear.

"But you can have the flowers surgically removed but you will never be able to return your feelings for the person ever again. But in your case, the flowers don't occupy your lungs and it doesn't grow back again every time you throw them up. Instead, you'll continue vomiting all the flowers in your lungs until they're gone and so are the memories" the doctor sadly smiled at you. "By the time that the flowers are out of your lungs, all the memories that you made with the person that you are in love with, will be completely wiped out. As if they never existed in the first place." 

You were completely speechless at what he just said to you. There are tons of things running in your mind but you can't speak.

"Do you know what kind of flowers you were throwing up, Ms. Y/N?" the doctor asked and you looked at him with tears in your eyes.

"Forget-me-nots"

~~~~~~

Hello everyone! New writer here~ How was the story? I hope you like my first story. Thank you for reading~~~

[itsmattsunshinehere]

Hello!! I was wondering if you could do a scenario with matsukawa and a shy reader? They get paired up for a project and matsukawa has never spoken to her bc she’s always quiet but as he gets to know her, he finds out she’s actually really funny bc she sends memes and they eventually fall in love 🤧 abit cliche but I’d love it 👉🏼👈🏼

Of course I can! I love Mattsun, so I’m always happy to write something with my sweet angel :)

I didn’t know how to put memes so there aren’t any BUT actually there are some nerdy jokes (wich I adore), like really really bad jokes. I kinda have the feeling Matsukawa only know these lmao, he’s dumb (BUT WE LOVE HIM). I hope it’s okay for you, please don’t hate me.

Thanks for your request, hope you like it! 😘💘

-L

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

A Change of Heart.

Matsukawa Issei x reader

synopsis: Matsukawa has never spoken to you, but something changes after you two being paired together for a school project.

word count: 2.1 K

tags: fluff

~~~

Matsukawa Issei. Of all the possible people, he was the last of your classmates you thought you could be paired with for group project. You don't have any problems with him, you don't find him annoying or anything else, it’s just that sometimes you forget about the presence of some of your classmates, Matsukawa included: you are a shy girl and you almost never talk during lessons; you often get distracted thinking about your own business, it is normal for you to not notice the people you don’t talk to, even more if they tend to be as quite as you.

On his side, even Issei hasn’t noticed you, too busy sleeping a few desks away from you: the night before he went to bed late, staying up until one o'clock only to play computer games with some friends.

Anyway, he's your science project partner and you can't do anything about it, even if you prefer to work alone and organize everything to your liking all by yourself, you'll have to collaborate with him and as you, even the guy agrees that for the sake of your GPA it will be essential to try to get along and cooperate. That's why at the end of the class, before your math teacher arrives, your project partner comes to your desk.

"Good morning Matsukawa-san." You greet him shyly, his height puts you slightly in awe, you’ve never noticed how tall he actually is.

"’Morning Y/N-san, apparently we are project companions." He replies to you yawning a little distracted, without looking too sure on what he’s saying; you get the impression that he would like to have been paired with someone else, probably one of his friends, but you try not to pay too much attention to your thoughts.

"Yes, that's correct." You nod looking at him again with a patient smile on your lips.

"I thought that maybe we could exchange our phone numbers to organize on what to do and when to see each other." The boy still keeps his eyes away from yours not looking at you but rather looking up at two of your classmates who are throwing a ball just a few feet from you. You smile at him once more and take your agenda, ripping off a sheet, and after writing some numbers, you give it to him.

"Here to you, I am almost always free every afternoon after six. How about starting in two days, maybe this Wednesday? Is it okay for you?" you ask him, and after thinking about it for a few minutes, as if he were consulting his own agenda mentally, the boy in front of you nods and after greeting you, he turns back to his desk.

You didn't think there were people quieter than you. Or maybe he thinks you’re boring. But what could you have done to him to make you so annoying? You put aside your bad thoughts and focus on the rest of the lessons, more concerned about your grades than the idea that your partner has of you. Of course, sometimes you tend to have no self-esteem, not trusting you’re decisions, but having never spoken to him, he has no reason to hate you, so you don't worry too much about what he might think of you.

But while you don't care about his thoughts, Issei can't say the same for himself: he's curious about what kind of girl you are, what a hobby you have... Why are you only free after six?? Are you in any club? Would you like to go to college? Are you moving to Tokyo next year as most of your classmates? He'd like to ask you so many questions, you intrigue him in a certain way, and he can't deny that you're a pretty girl. He finds adorable how you carry the pencil on your lips every time you stare at the sky out the window.

The two days pass fast, and from Monday you are almost immediately to Wednesday afternoon in the library, you waiting for him at the table on the corner and he who has to run because, due to Oikawa and his obsession with improving the whole team’s service, he is definitely late. The boy looks out the door of the room and rushes you to a table near the windows, listening to music with headphones in your ears and studying some subject. He joins you, slowing down the pace trying not to make any noise.

"Y/N-san." He calls you whispering, but you don't hear him, which is why he tries to get your attention by touching your arm as he sits by your side and you gasp surprised, causing him to giggle.

"I'm sorry if I scared you." You look at the boy with a gentle smile, moving your hand and telling him that he doesn’t have to worry.

“It's nothing, I was doing chemistry homework for tomorrow, but I can't calculate the reaction and find the name of this binary salt.” You say giving up your homework, changing the page of the book and taking the section assigned to you for your work.

"You know chemists are great solving problems? They have all the solutions." Matsukawa replay with a smile, taking your notebook and looking at what you've written.

"I tried telling a chemistry joke once, but I got no reaction." You watch the boy with a grin as Matsukawa lifts his head up surprised, definitely not expecting a joke from you, but you instead look at him laughing at his expression and Matsukawa gives you a sincere smile chuckling.

Time passes quickly as you organize your project and decide what and how to expose it to your classmates. You divide your work and begin your research together, each one giving his own contribution to the other, to try to make it better and giving a sense to what you are doing. When you look at the phone you realize that it is now seven and a half o'clock in the evening and you inform your project partner, who nods and you two begin to pick up your books. Matsukawa is faster than you, so waits for you at the library entrance.

"Y/N-san, I wanted to ask you a question." He tells you while he’s walking by your side, and you can't help but think about how many centimeters there are between you two. You nod kindly with your head.

"How come you never talk? You're funny." He asks you a little hesitantly, and you think for a second about what to answer. You don't know that either, it's not that you don't have any friends, it’s just that you're not the kind of person who starts a conversation. You have no problem talking to others, you just don't like to take the first step.

"Sorry, maybe I was too rude." Matsukawa says softly, worried that he has maybe offended you in some way, but you shake your head with a smile, trying to make him understand that he didn't do anything wrong.

"No don't worry. I can't give you an answer, I think it's just my character. I'm a very shy girl and I tend to stand all by myself, but I've never had a problem talking to people. Once I know someone, I have no problem opening up." you answer him by giving him yet another smile of the day.

Matsukawa looks at you as you walk past him and reach the school gate: part of him that morning had been convinced that he would be bored with you, he felt like you were a serious person, unable to make jokes or something similar. Yet you have happily surprised him, showing a side of your character that you keep secret and that maybe you only show to your closest friends. He feels a bit special.

You reach the gate and you greet him by according to meet at Friday at the same time and so on the following Monday, ending up meeting on those three days every week throughout the entire month, in the library at six in the afternoon.

It has become a habit for you, as well as exchanging messages, during lessons or in your free time. You start spending more and more time together, on lunch breaks you join Matsukawa with his friends in the school canteen, having fun joking with Hanamaki. Matsukawa feels that something has changed. He understands that he has started looking at you differently, seeing you always beautiful and always happy. He understands it from how he has started to notice details on your face; that little mole on your chin, how you tie your hair when you're focused on some math exercise.

A change in his heart.

He starts to think that yours are no longer just moments where you study, but that they are slowly evolving into something more intimate, much more like dating, where you joke and talk about anything. As you tell him how you would like to travel the world, he tells you about the few places he has visited abroad; while you talk to him about the reading club you're a part of, he tells you about his passion for volleyball and his dream of going to the Nationals tournament with his team. You unravel your secrets to each other, without fear, fully trusting each other.

Until one day, when Iwaizumi seeing him smiling atone of your message suggests him something, a particular idea that remains stuck in his head for days.

"You should ask her out." The ace tells him with conviction and the middle blocker looks at him doubtful, not too convinced that you may be interested in dating him.

"Definitely, you can’t take your eyes off her and you're always distracted. Push your pride aside and make the first move before someone takes her away from you." Hanamaki speaks by sitting on the bench next to him and taking a sip from his water bottle. Matsukawa bursts into laughter, though he can't deny that a certain annoying feeling has awakened in him. Maybe jealousy? Impossible, unless...?

The days pass and the date of the presentation of your project approaches, until you arrive at the last Friday before you have to expose your work in front of the whole class, Iwaizumi's words have not yet disappeared from Issei’s mind, as well as those of Hanamaki. What if someone realizes what a beautiful person you are and asks you out? Maybe he should make a move, or maybe they just told him to annoy him... he walks through the corridors until you reach the library that you have been frequented for just over a month. He sees you sitted in your usual place with the usual headphones in your ears and the usual chemistry notebook under your eyes.

He comes near you, moving the chair next to you and sitting to your right and you as always don't even notice him, too caught up in what you're doing. He touches your arm and as always you gasp, quickly turning towards him, while Matsukawa giggles for your reaction. You tongue out and punch him on his shoulder.

"You know you scare my Issei!" you scold him while once again the boy next to you takes your notebook and looks at what's wrong with your equations, remembering when few minutes before you text him that you couldn't do anything.

"Here you go. You miscalculated." Matsukawa answers by giving you back your notebook.

"Forget hydrogen, you're my number one element!" you smile him while he giggles a bit.

"Oh, it's that time of the day where we tell each other stupid chemistry jokes?" he asks you chuckling and you nod happily.

"Well I hope you love science, because tonight we are going to have a chemical reaction." The boy immediately answers you and you can't hold back a laugh, getting the attention of the last remaining students that like you are study and the librarian, who throws you glances from behind her desk. Embarrassed, you apologize and look over Matsukawa, while the boy has a sip of water.

"How about you ask me out first?" you whisper him, blushing instantly, and the boy almost chokes with water and begins coughing, while you try to help him, this time you're the one giggling for the other’s reaction.

Once calmed down, Matsukawa looks up at you, as red as you. Did you really say that? He tries to think of what to answer quickly, not wanting to waste the opportunity.

"There’s a Cafe where they make delicious pancakes." He proposes you embarrassed and you look at him happy, beginning to pick up your books under Matsukawa's eye.

"It’d be amazing." You stand up slowly, sticking your hand out with a smile. Matsukawa copies your movements and gets up taking his backpack. He squeezes your hand with a wink.

“Let’s go.”

[kashimos-hajime]

immeasurable firsts | s.r.

Summary: All your firsts with Steve Rogers and all the heartbreak and happiness that comes with it.

A/N: For the writing challenge hosted by the fabulous @imhereforbvcky and the wonderful @justsomebucky. 

Dedicating this to @wxntersoldiers because I still have to write for her and I hope this’ll make up for how late I’m gonna submit it in! (I’ll get to it soon!!!!)

WARNINGS: Swearing, blood, violence, death, extreme angst but some happy stuff too.

Word Count: 11.6k Pairing: Steve Rogers x Stark-sister! Reader Prompt: The most ridiculous part of this whole situation is that I love you.

Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Four easy words to describe Tony Stark.

You, on the other hand. Genius, billionaire, philanthropist all fit. Playboy? Perhaps. You prefer socialite. The paparazzi has always had their bite at you but that doesn’t mean that none of it is true.

You are Y/N Stark, younger sister of one Anthony Edward Stark, one certified pain in the ass, and one big brother. He was basically everything you had ever since your parents died. He raised you. He was your dad, and mom, and brother all at once, and you know that no one could’ve done it better. From what you know and what Tony tells you about your dad, you’re better off.

But your mom… you miss her every day.

On a full-ride to MIT just like him, you succeeded him in every way, graduating summa cum laude just like him, but while he did it when he was seventeen, you did it when you were eighteen. He always held that fact over you, but not after you mentioned that while he hacked into the Pentagon for a dare, you hacked into the Harry S. Truman building for fun. State department had a field day with that one.

As Stark Industries head of Research and Development, you occupy all of four floors and helped more than 12% to make Stark Towers the first building powered by self-sustainable clean energy, but you’d let your brother take all that credit if it meant your brother gets some with Pepper.

“Ma’am, Agent Coulson is on the line. Mr. Stark deferred him to you.” Swiping the holoscreen to close it, you look up from where you’re working on new schematics for your suit.

“Tony’s in.”

“Mr. Stark insists on refusing the call, and Agent Coulson insists on seeing him.”

Rolling your eyes, you pull up another holoscreen that linked you to the surveillance feed. Switching through the cameras, you swipe for Tony’s private elevator. You spot the agent standing outside the elevator, texting away on his phone and you turn on your mic with a smile.

“Hey, Phil,” you greet and the agent looked up, turning to the camera.

“Ms. Stark.” He gives you a little wave and you straighten up, putting your stylus away and turning off your tablet. Moving the surveillance feed to your phone, you walk to the couch you had in your office, sitting down and pulling your laptop on with you. Opening it up, you log in. “If you could ask your brother to pick up the phone, that’d be a great help.”

“You know Tony doesn’t listen to me.” Opening up the files Tony had sent you earlier, blueprints for Stark Tower and the grocery list for next week, you roll your eyes at the note at the end. ‘Pep said it’s my turn to do nothing for a whole week,’ it reads. Your fingers work away on your keyboard as you return your attention to Phil. “I’m going to disable J.A.R.V.I.S.’s protocols and give random people access to his private elevator because he’s annoyed me just now. You do whatever you want with that information.”

“Thank you. And you might need to join me, Ms. Stark.”

“Is it something important? Because my consulting hours don’t normally run this long. Also, I thought I said I didn’t want anymore S.H.I.E.L.D. assignments.” Tapping away on your keyboard, you have the elevator doors open and bypass the A.I.’s protocols.

“It’s urgent.”

“When do I ever care about that?” you retort. The call ends and you get up anyway, glaring at your phone. With a heavy sigh, you slip the device into your pocket before looking at the few holo screens you have open around the office. The levels of the reactor are stable, and you watch as they fluctuated, readjusting every once in a while.

“J.A.R.V.I.S., shut the place down. After I go see Tony, I’m heading home.”

“Of course, Ms. Stark.”

You live essentially next door to the tower, and it isn’t important for you to bring anything home, so you grab your keys and purse before leaving your office of glass doors and walls and windows. The lights turn off behind you as you jab the elevator button, ready to head up to say goodnight to Tony and see what Phil Coulson thought was so urgent.

.

The Avengers Initiative.

And they thought Tony was a good fit?

“Volatile, self-obsessed, don’t play well with others,” you recite as you read over the files in Tony’s penthouse on the top floor of Stark Towers. “If he wanted the better of the Starks, he would’ve chosen me,” you tease. Tony sighs, wiping a hand over his face and you frown. Sigh in that tone means frustration, exhaustion, and he’s feeling overwhelmed.

“What is it?” Looking to see what’s caught your brother’s attention, you swallow and get up, walking around the couch to touch the hologram of the thing that your father had found instead of a man. “The Tesseract,” you whisper, suddenly finding your mouth very dry. Blinking, you twist the hologram around before pulling back. Your father had been obsessed with the thing. Hell, he probably loved it more than he ever loved the two of you. Your brother’s pulled back, too, arms crossed as his dark gaze flickers over the other portfolios.

“Some crack team, huh,” he mutters but your eyes can’t tear away from the blue glowing cube. Your dad always talked about it — well, it and Captain America, who happened to be in one of the portfolios, but you can’t help the nagging feeling that the cube is better left in the ocean where no one can find it. After all, they wouldn’t have to drag your brother into this mess if it was.

“Tony,” you call out when your brother moves for the bar. He pulls up a bottle of scotch and silently asks if you want a drink. Shaking your head, you bite your lip and gather what nerves you have left to ask the question. “Should I be worried?”

There is no answer.

.

“Hey, how was it?” you ask when Tony returns to the Helicarrier. The suit decompresses and you smirk, arching a brow. “Get the bad guy?”

“Yeah, and a plus one. Oh, uh—” Tony turns to the other guys piling out of the Quinjet. The clanging of chains catch your attention as S.H.I.E.L.D. agents swarm the jet, escorting the prisoner out. Loki, you realize. Following him is a tall blond and an even taller blond, though the taller one follows after Loki. Thor. Had to be. Your brother gestures to the two— “the rest of the crack team. You talk to Banner, yet?”

“Not yet. They told me he was down in the lab, but I was working on my suit. I’ve a new set of schematics I wanna try out, if you have the time.”

“You only made a suit to copy me,” he teases and you nudge him playfully. “Yeah, sure. If we have time, after the world finishes it’s self-destruction, or whatever, we should take it out for a spin.”

“Thanks, Ant.” He sighs at the nickname but you squeeze his arm, watching him go. He needs to get that suit off, and you need to get that decryption implant on the motherboard. If Tony’s going into this, he isn’t going into it blind. Anyone who’s working with the Tesseract, especially an organization like S.H.I.E.L.D., wouldn’t use this for clean energy. And you’ve worked missions with them before. You know that eco-friendly energy is the last thing on their mind. Howard Stark may have wanted it for clean energy, but if an intergalactic war is being had…

You put a pin on that train of your thought as your gaze drifted back to the armory. The shorter blond nodded to you with a smile, and you put on a fresh face for Steve Rogers, World War Two Hero, actual soldier-type with a cute smile. Tilting your head, you walk up to him and stick out a hand. In your heels, you could’ve tried to be as tall as him but his presence adds two inches to his height.

“Captain Rogers, honor to meet you.”

“Steve,” he amends as he quirks an eyebrow. “And you are? Sorry, it’s been a whirlwind couple of days.”

“Y/N Stark,” you say, shaking his hand. He’s warm and his blue eyes fix on yours as you take in his features. He’s even cuter up close. “And no problem. Not everyone can spend their time as a Capsicle.”

“Your brother made the same joke,” Steve says as you begin to walk down the hall with him.

“He only got the chance because he met you first.” Heading down to the briefing room, you glance at him to find him staring back. Arching an eyebrow, you wait until he notices and a brilliant blush spreads across his cheeks, but you smirk, brushing the hair away from your face and leading him to the room where your brother is waiting.

.

After the Battle of New York — that’s what the news is calling it, you call it an inconvenience — the dust settled to reveal the true damage of it. There’s a lot of rebuilding to do, specifically the area around Stark Tower, which means a lot of money is needed to repair downtown New York. Of course, the best way to get the rich to donate money is a charity ball, and the fact that it’s able to be doubled as a celebration ball makes Tony absolutely gleeful. You, on the other hand, would rather be anywhere but here. The destruction caused in Stark Tower has given you nothing but a headache and whilst Tony and the Avengers had gone for shawarma, you’d suited up to begin lifting the rubble and seeing the true damage underneath the whole ‘saving the planet’. Which you can respect, by the way, but you didn’t want to test out the new suit by lifting up heavy concrete and wires.

Now, all you want to do head back, take an Advil, and sleep the day off. Whilst the Avengers had decided to steal the show, you never said a thing about how Tony literally flew into a fucking wormhole.

You still need to yell at him for that one. Maybe cry. And hug him. For a long time.

“You need to relax,” Tony mumble through his smile as the three of you gathered your bearings to get out of the limousine.

“You need to stop making us late,” you retort. “And wormhole, remember? You’re still in for it.”

He sends you a sheepish smile, his eyes pleading apology, but you ignore it, stepping out. Pepper holds onto Tony’s arm to get out, whilst you pick up the edges of your dress, a brilliant scarlet dress, with a slit up the side of your leg and elegantly pull yourself up.

Adjusting the gold cuff on your wrist, you grab your gold clutch and shade your eyes against the flashes. Tony and Pep are already walking through the paparazzi, up the stairs to the venue for the Avengers, the cameras snapping away. Used to it, you tuck your hair behind your ear to showcase your outfit. In scarlet and gold, you shine under the flashes.

“Ms. Stark!” one of the photographers call out and you pause, striking a small pose before continuing on. The tire screeches behind you signify another arrival and you turn with a small smile, wondering who it could be. The black car’s window slide down, revealing a star-struck Steve Rogers and he steps out, squinting against the flashing lights. Raising a hand in half a wave and half a means to block the light, the super-soldier’s gaze dart across the scene before landing on you. You extend your hand to him, smiling. He speed-walks over to you, grateful for a friendly face and he offers an arm for you to take, escorting you inside.

“I’m glad you got out safe,” you begin, tucking a curl behind you ear as he focuses on getting up to the stairs. You throw a wave to the crowd, before adding, “I was maybe a tiny bit worried about you. More so about Tony, but then I wonder why.” You pretend to tap your chin in curiosity and he chuckles.

“I’m flattered. And you’re beautiful,” he mumbles under his breath, cheeks red but you can’t tell if it’s because of you or the cameras. Smiling softly, you press your head against his shoulder for a moment before lifting it again to look at the soldier. “I dunno if anyone’s told you that yet.”

“No one that matters,” you tell him and you pause to kiss his cheek. His shy smile makes you smile wider, the endearing expression on his face causing warmth to spread through you. Cameras take snapshots of your moment and you internally sigh. There comes one of the cons of being a public figure. You have no doubt some stupid hashtag like #Rogerstark or, you don’t know, #Ironcaptain, will be trending on twitter by the night’s end. “And you look good, too. Real good.”

“Uh,” he chuckles, blushing and you laugh. “Thanks.”

“Overwhelmed, yet?” You climb the steps, using Steve’s hand to steady yourself before he opens the door for you. You hold his hand to bring him in and the pap calls after the two of you even when the door closes. If he’s gonna give the press content, you might as well have fun with it. Even if he doesn’t mean too — he’s just being the gentleman he is.

“A bit, yeah, but not by the cameras.”

You chew on the inside of your lip. You don’t know if you’re insulted or not. “By me?”

“In the best way. Gotta impress the most gorgeous woman in the room,” he promises and you hold him to that promise. “I’m sure the cameras will get worse, too. But you seem to be doing just fine,” he says and you chuckle. Patting his arm, you lead him, following the signs that say This Way or something of the variant.

“I grew up going to this kinda stuff. I’m used to it by now. But if you keep being you, the press is gonna eat you up.”

“How do you mean?”

“You’re a real gentleman, Rogers,” you sing. The foyer is filled with tons of guests, some drinking while others are eating some nuts or chips, and there’s an open door leading to the white carpet. Of course, they’re waiting for all the Avengers to go on first, and you can hear the anxious muttering of the paparazzi outside the room.

“I don’t see how that’s a bad thing.”

“Well, people like prying into other people’s lives,” you continue and he nods. His gaze darts across the room just as a server comes by with a tray of champagne. Disentangling your arm from Steve’s, you take two. “Steve, I’m just saying, the paps love to make speculations about Tony and I. Sometimes, it’s the only thing keeping them open, and a lot of people don’t like the attention, the stalkers, the fans.” Offering the champagne, you give him a forced smile. “A lot of people don’t wanna stay because of it.”

“What if I want to?”

“What?” You nearly let out a laugh but Steve looks totally serious as his gaze catches yours. They’re darker, more intense, but there’s still that sense of light to him. Like he’s having fun getting the shock out of you.

“I said, what if I wanted to stay? I’m an Avenger now. Might as well get used to it and I think we’re stuck with each other.”

You drain your champagne, blink, and then stare at him as if he’s grown a second head. “I have no illusions on being a celebrity, Y/N. I’ve had a few experiences of my own, and it may be a bit different from back then, but I know.”

“It’s a lot different, Steve.”

“Maybe not so much.” He takes your hand and the champagne, leading you to the side of the room where there are small high tables where people can stand and chat over food, and he places his full flute and your empty one on the tablecloth. “Y/N, I’m just saying, let the press eat it up. We know what we are.”

And what’s that? you wonder helplessly as he says that they should get to the carpet. Tony and Pepper have already started, and Steve visibly recoils. Looping your arm through his, you send him a reassuring smirk, if possible.

“You might have to squint, Cap,” you whisper nefariously and he sends you a roll of his eyes as you put on your celebrity face. It hides your inner turmoil well as you kill over Steve’s words. With the most handsome man in the room on your arm, you send smolder and smolder whilst the soldier tries to ease into his smiles. It’s easier once you get him laughing at your jokes, and it’s hard to imagine you’d ever dreaded going to the event at all.

.

To say you and Steve see each other over the next few years would be an understatement. Seeing as how you are in Washington occasionally, flying back and forth for work, the Triskelion is one of the few places you’d actually get excited to see once in a while. You’re actually in Washington when Steve’s called away on a mission. Sitwell’s called you in for an emergency consult. Well, he called Tony. You picked up the call. And what you came to was Nick Fury’s deathbed.

The image makes you shudder.

Suiting up, you propel yourself out of your Washington flat and fly towards the Triskelion. At night, Washington looks like any other city, breathtaking and alight with life. The Washington Monument’s glow casts its base in warm light as you fly over it, slowing down to admire your view and postpone going to the Triskelion. Ever since Steve knocked out the S.T.R.I.K.E. team in the elevator, you’ve been feeling like there had to be a reason.

Your reflection in the water is barely visible except for the glow of your repulsors, eyes, and arc reactor, and you float above it, the squirming feeling in your stomach ever growing.

Why do you have the feeling just like the one before the Battle of New York?

A number you don’t recognize calls you, but you pick up anyway, having A.N.A encrypt your location just in case as you fight off the feeling. Tony’s safe in New York — as safe as he can be fixing up the quarters for the Avengers who still drop by from time to time. Just one night of consultation, and then you’re back there with him, eating microwave dinners and working on new things.

“Hey, Y/N.”

“Steve? Where are you?” Shaking yourself, you continue on your way to the Triskelion just as his voice echoes in your ears again.

“Sam’s. And you need to listen to me.”

“Are you okay?” you ask despite yourself. You haven’t seen him since the hospital, and if you’re honest with yourself, you kinda miss him. Plus, he wasn’t looking too great when you’d left.

You hold his hand, stepping closer as he stares at Natasha’s back. The red-haired woman’s head is bowed to hide her tears and you look to Steve. His eyes stare back at you but he doesn’t truly see you as you wrap your other hand around his arm, resting your head against his shoulder. He squeezes your hand tighter. You simply close your eyes and press your cheek against his jacket as your fingers interlace. He looks down, and you raise your head to see what he’s looking at.

A silver USB lies in his hand and your eyebrows knit together when you look at the make. S.H.I.E.L.D. made. When he catches you staring, however, he shoves it back into your pocket. A silent question that he ignores lays within your eyes.

“I didn’t want to leave the hospital so soon, but consultation couldn’t wait on the pumping problem,” you continue, diving into the water surrounding the building as your suit readjusts the air pressure and you turn on your headlamps. The water before you filters out the moon as you dive deeper.

“It’s fine. I just wanted to check up with you.”

“Why? ‘Cause I’m heading underwater and the slightest malfunction of the suit could kill me?” you ask, initiating the lights in your repulsors. Steve lets out a sigh of a laugh quietly on the other end as you squint, making out the shape of the pipelines.

“You made that suit, Y/N. I know it won’t,” he replies, but he sounds tense and you make yourself redirect the conversation. Your HUD emits a gentle light as it does a preliminary scan on the pipelines.

“Thanks, Steve. So… where are you now? I mean, now that you’re on the run.”

“That’s what I’ve got to talk to you about.”

Pulling up, you frown. No leaks and the Stark Industry sustainable filter is running flawlessly. You’d installed it yourself, along with the other convertors along the lines. Turning off your mic, you raise your arm.

“A.N.A., can you run a scan? Sitwell said it was in this area, and I’m not sure if I’m being delusional.”

“Of course, Ms. Stark.” The repulsor gauntlet shoots out a grid of blue light, a bar of blue scanning the pipes as you work your way down the whole area. Resuming your call with Steve, you clear your throat.

“Sorry, Steve, what is it? Is it about why you gave Rumlow the black eye he deserves?” you joke.

“Y/N, S.H.I.E.L.D. has been compromised.” Your heart stops. Maybe you are delusional.

“What?”

“Whatever you do, don’t take another assignment from them. You need to leave D.C. now.”

“Steve, I—”

“There is an unknown object approaching your vector.” A.N.A.’s warning interrupts whatever you were going to say, and kick starts your wired brain. You twist around, all sources of light shutting off at once with a quiet whir. Letting yourself sink, you steady your breathing and turn on your night vision just as something explodes right next to you. It sends you tumbling, your head rattling in your suit as you spin in the water, trying to regain your sense of up and down.

“A.N.A., find the source!” Managing to stabilize yourself to a stop, you shake your head. Something’s trickling down your temple, and there’s a familiar ache in your arm that was closest to the blast. You still can’t hear well aside from the ringing and you strain to hear.

“Already on it.”

Y/N, what’s going on?” Steve asks but his voice crackles over the line and you wince, trying to ignore how grating it is on your ears as blue shapes are highlighted on your HUD. Submarines by the looks of it. S.H.I.E.L.D. warships armed with missiles, mines, and torpedos.

Fuck, really? In the Potomac? You have no time for questions like that, though, and with every second you waste sinking to the bottom, it’s another second feeling like the water’s going to seep into your suit and asphyxiate you. Another missile launches towards you and you swerve out of the way, letting it land in the riverbed.

“I was in Washington for a consultation on the Triskelion’s pump system,” you whisper. “Fucking great that they’re compromised now, huh?”

“Engaging boosters.” Your ankles lock together, you press your hands against your sides and look up as you propel yourself to the surface. You’re a great white beacon of light and heat now that you’ve given up all hope of defeating war subs in your mechanic armor. “Missiles fired. They’ve tracked your infrared signature, ma’am.”

“Y/N?” Steve’s voice cracks the comms again as moonbeams begin to break through. “What’s going?”

“S.H.I.E.L.D. subs are on me. Five. Shit!” A missile strikes your foot and you let out a yelp as the booster fails. Veering off, you try to get back on course. “Targeting system. They know all the weak points of this suit. Fuck! My booster’s down.” Swerving out of the way of another swarm of missiles, you run diagnostics on your failed repulsor node just as A.N.A. gives out another warning that another barrage is incoming. Your heart beats in your throat, blood dripping over and down your neck, and you try to unscramble your thoughts. S.H.I.E.L.D. is attacking you. S.H.I.E.L.D. is attacking you. Holy shit.

Tony’s going to be so pissed.

“Can you fire back?”

“It’s my repair suit. It’s not meant for battle. I didn’t think I’d get attacked by fucking S.H.I.E.L.D.!” The second barrage nearly gets you and you let out a breath of relief when they all whiz past, only for a bigger cruise missile to slam into your side. Infrared tech on a cruise missile with diamond nibs. These are war-grade, way above anyone’s pay-grade and slice through your suit like it’s soft cheese. It digs into you and you let out a terrified gasp.

It’s a small explosion, granted, but it no doubt shatters your ribs and blows something apart inside you. Ears ringing, you scream over the sound of A.N.A. giving you a status report on the suit, but over your own hoarse voice, you know that water’s surging into your suit, your ribs are shattered, and you’re probably going to die. A.N.A. quarantines the water, sealing you from the neck up as you frantically touch your wound. Your A.I. has already dispatched the emergency lock, your second skin of armor spanning over your abdomen and binding your insides together.

“Injuries?”

“Shattered ribs, multiple third-degree burns and massive internal damage.”

“Communications?” you wheeze, trying to breathe but your lungs struggle against the ribs that float around in your chest cavity as you clutch at the wound. A.N.A. had been as fast as she could, closing over the wound as soon as she detected it, but dirty, freezing river water still got in. It laps at your wounds, soothing the burns and washing through your insides simultaneously. Melting from the inside out, you suck in your scream and blink, trying to ignore the tears streaming down your face as you pray for the adrenaline to kick in.

“Offline. They’ve scrambled the frequency.”

“Unscramble it! We need to tell Steve he needs to get out of here and tell Tony what’s happening. I’ll focus on the staying alive part.” Although sobs tear at your throat and blackness dots your vision from the pain, you squint through your tears to look at the HUD. A list of systems that are offline continue to scroll down the side as the water begins to pick up, pulling and pushing you in all directions.

“Y-Y-Y/N? Can you read me? Hey!”

“Still alive, yet, Cap,” you manage to say, redirecting all energy to your one working foot. “Come on, come on.” Every movement is sending agony rushing down to your chest and it’s like the water pressure presses down into your chest. Even breathing is getting difficult as a knot forms between your lungs. Heaving for air, you begin to speed up to the surface. Water streams down the sides, bubbles popping and foam disappearing before your eyes. Suddenly, beeping begins out of left-field.

“They’re sending more cruise missiles, ma’am. Without your other repulsor node, you won’t be able to outfly them.”

“But I’m so fucking close!”

“It won’t matter, Ms. Stark. They’ve locked into your heat signature and this suit does not have the capability to lower or mask your in-suit heat output.” A.N.A.’s words make you blink and you let out a desperate sigh, your breathing coming ragged as the water closes in on you. Your vision blurs, and for a moment, your head dips forward before you snap open your eyes. “I’m sorry, Ms. Stark.” Your A.I. sounds so fucking crushed and she’s already grieving and you regret coding in emotions because you want to cry, and not because of the pain.

“It’s not your fault, A.N.A.”

Blinking, you try to calm yourself down but it’s all coming so close. Your helmet can’t protect you for long, you’re going to die, you’re going to die, you’re going to die—

“You’ll send a message to Tony? The message?” you ask and the world stops. The startling realization that you might truly die here in the Potomac slams into you and you nearly let out a scream at how fucking unfair it is. Ribbons of tears track down your face, and you compress yourself into a compact slip of armor, hoping it’ll give you that chance to outrun it, but you know that it won’t. You graduated from MIT, just like Tony. Your big brother Tony. You know the math. The beeping gets louder, gets faster.

A watery smile appears on your face, your lips trembling as it crumbles away and you openly sob. Your face is hot and you breathe in hot air, and you need to breathe. Oh, god, you’re gonna die of asphyxiation before you die of your injuries and everything’s closing in on you—

“Of course, Ms. Stark.” You take comfort in A.N.A.s voice and confirmation, trying to pull what’s left of you together.  “Thank you.” It’s just within reach, but the beeping in your ears tells you the missiles are closer. They’re hot on your trail and your faulty booster has no intention of coming back soon. Remembering your call, you swallow whatever tears you have left and ignore the ache in your throat. Everything hurts, but nothing so much as the pain one can get from knowing what they’re leaving behind. “Steve?” 

Crackling, and then a thick voice comes on and you know he’s crying too, “I’m here.”

Your eyes reflect the moon’s beams, and you can only see that beautiful full moon surrounded by so much darkness, and you wonder if this is what Tony saw up in that wormhole. The light at the end of a tunnel. You swallow, nod, and tell yourself that you can’t feel the pain anymore. The adrenaline in my body’s numbing it, you reason to yourself. I’ll die from my injuries before I can get to a hospital, so there’s no point in feeling it. The beeping becomes insistent, but you don’t look back. If you don’t look back, maybe they aren’t there.

“Ms. Stark…”

“It’s okay, A.N.A. You did your best.” Clenching your jaw, you try to make sure your next words can be made out. They need to count, you need him to hear you loud and clear, and he seems to sense this because he begins to whisper these nothings meant to make you feel better, or to stall you. You hope it’s to make to feel better. 

Because it works.

“Steve, when I die, tell Tony that… that I love him, and he deserves so many things in this world. Tell him, tell him he is the best brother I could’ve asked for, and—“

“Hey, Y/N. You’re gonna outfly those rockets. You’re the best damn pilot I know. So, stop talking like you’re gonna die.”

“Steve—“

“Y/N, it’s gonna be okay. It’ll be okay, doll, you’re gonna be just fine, and then you’ll come over to Sam’s, and we’ll be on the run together.” Steve’s voice cracks and it damn well near breaks you as the A.N.A. goes radio silent. The HUD turns off. She’s conserving energy. That can only mean one thing. “Won’t that be fun? Huh? We’ll be… what was it that was trending after the 2012 gala? That hashtag…”

You let out a noise that’s somewhere between a sob and a laugh as your eyes close. “#Ironcaptain and #Starogers were both trending,” you remind him. His voice is soft and hoarse, and exactly how you imagined him in the mornings. You’ll never get to fucking see him again. Fuck. Life. Fuck. You.

“That’s right, doll. You’re right. You’re so beautiful and smart. You’re tough as, uh, iron, and you’re always right.”

“Dork.”

“Yeah, I’m your dork, though. So, you’ve gotta make it. You’re perfect. That’s why you’ll make it, okay?” He’s in so much denial it pains you to the core and all you want to do is grab him in a hug and tell him that you’re going to die but it’ll be okay. But he’s on the other side of the city and he can’t save you this time. “That’s why I’m gonna see you again, and I’m gonna tell you so many things. So you’ve got to stay alive, alright? ‘Cause I needa tell you all about Camp Lehigh and Bucky and you’re supposed to be here with me ‘cause you’re one of my best friends and I need you, okay? It’s been like that since the beginning, Y/N. Before everything, before that gala, before we were friends. I was always the puppy trailing after you. So you can’t die.”

“Steve,” you choke out as you open your eyes again. You reach your uninjured arm for the surface. Your fingers are barely brushing the air and you can imagine the wind on your face. You might make it. “Steve, I’m scared to die.”

“You’re not gonna die, so there’s nothing to be scared of,” he tells you like it's a fact and not something that’s stopping you from turning off every repulsor node you have left. You’re so tired but your arm breaks free, and then your suit and then you’re soaring through the sky.

Flying through the air, you hear the whistle of wind and missile trail after you. You made it to the surface and for what? Here you’ll be, shot down like game anyway. Is that all live is? A game of hope and lies and deceit, just for some god out there?

If it is, when you die, you’ll tell them that you were never playing. You’ll tell whatever god who’s watching to go fuck themselves. Find someone else to play with.

“Steve,” you whisper, because you need to say it as many times as you can before you can’t anymore. “Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve, Steve.”

“I’m here. I’m right here waiting for you.”

You laugh into your next words, cheeks soaking with tears as you raise your eyes to the moon. “I’m glad that it’s you.” 

The missiles dig into your armor — legs, chest, arms in that order — and explode. You are a dying star, the last brilliant flash of light and beauty and the magnificence of the universe before you are extinguished. 

On the other side of Washington, Steve watches the orange cloud of fire and smoke consume the air around it hungrily as a lone figure drops into the water.

.

“Zola’s algorithm… is a program for choosing I.N.S.I.G.H.T.’s targets.”

“What targets?”

“You! A TV anchor in Cairo, the Undersecretary of Defense, a high school valedictorian in Iowa city.” Sitwell swallows visibly and Steve’s nails dig into his palms as he stares at the pathetic man. “Bruce Banner, Stephen Strange, anyone who's a threat to HYDRA! Now, or in the future. It’s why we killed Y/N Stark.” Blood drips down Steve’s fingers as he grabs Sitwell’s collar, hauling him to his feet.

“What did you say?”

“We… it was a confirmed hit.” Sitwell’s confession rings in Steve’s ears and he lifts him up higher, wanting him to choke.

“You say her name one more time, no one’s gonna stop you when you’re thrown off the building.” He lets the man drop to a pile on the ground. The blood from his palms mark where he’d grabbed the traitor and Steve resists the urge to kick him. Instead, he asks how Zola’s algorithm can predict the future whilst thinking of every way imaginable on how he can destroy H.Y.D.R.A., one agent at a time.

.

“Y/N wouldn’t want some priest,” Steve says, playing with Sam’s cellphone. He’d given it to him after what happened in Washington, but Steve’s never grabbed the strength to play the voicemail sent to the number not long after your last call together. The anger he had has sapped away until all that’s left is the space you used to fill with your laugh and smile. He never even got to tell you how he felt about you— “Maybe something quiet. Her stuff burned, something like that.”

“How the hell would you know what she wanted?” Tony whispers. His rage is simmering so close to the surface, so close to his breaking point, that Steve looks up. They’re gathered in the Avengers Tower, all of them for once, and Tony slams his hand on the table, head bowed. 

“Tony,” Bruce begins but he ignores him, pushing off the table and walking back towards the window of the penthouse, staring off to the skyline. “I’m sorry. You couldn’t have stopped it.”

“I could’ve. I could’ve told her not to go.”

“You couldn’t have known S.H.I.E.L.D. was compromised,” Natasha adds, although her eyes are red rimmed and there’s something croaky in her voice. Steve’s heard her cry. He knows. “None of us knew.” Tony whips around.

“You were supposed to protect her!” His words make Steve flinch more than the volume he screams it at. Steve’s blood rushes to his head in his shame, and a familiar bruise blooms in his throat. “I trusted you. You promised me you’d protect her.”

“I promised I’d try, Tony,” he whispers. “And I couldn’t. Neither could you. If you were in my position, you wouldn’t have made it in time.”

“I could’ve. I could’ve, with my suit. I could have saved her if I was in your position, because I would have had the suit!” Tipping over a wine glass and letting it smash to the floor, all but Tony flinch when he walks over the shards of broken glass. “You don’t have any idea what I could’ve done.” 

Steve falls silent. He turns on the phone screen, turns it off again, and flips it over to feel the edges where the screen protector has cracked.

“Tony,” Thor begins, speaking for the first time since he’s arrived. His dark blue eyes are storms on seas and the air around him blurs with energy. The air tastes like lightning. “Look at me.”

“I could’ve saved her,” Tony repeats.

“Look at me.” Dark eyes meet storm blue. “You could not have gone across the city, bring her out of the water, and take her to a hospital alive. Even if you did find her, she would have bled out or succumbed to her injuries.” His voice lowers as Tony’s head drops forward, tears racing down his nose and cheeks. “We all saw the suit.”

“Doesn’t mean she’s dead,” Tony whispers. He jolts himself out of Thor’s grasp and walks back to the window. “She could’ve made it out. Someone could’ve saved her.”

“Tony,” Natasha calls softly, “we need to—“

“‘We’,” the man repeats incredulously. He gives them all a sneer. Tony’s bitter smile could make hell freeze over and Steve pockets the phone, standing. “I’m sorry, there’s a ‘we’ in this situation? Who’s her brother here?”

“Tony, that isn’t fair—”

“There is no ‘we’. You all think she’s dead, but we never got a body. That’s what isn’t fair about this. You’re supposed to be her friends, her family, and you’ve just given up on her! She could still be out there. She could still be kicking and you’ve all given up on her!” Swiping a hand out to the window, he stares at them, waiting for them to agree. When they don’t, his head bows as his hands ball into fists. With a sigh, all the strength leaves him and Tony’s shoulders slump. When he looks up again, his eyes are shining wet, dark earth after a storm.

“Tony,” Steve says his name faintly, then clears his throat. Standing up, he waits for the response and gets none. He begins his way to the man who personifies all stages of grief. His throat bruised from holding in tears, he just calls his name again until Tony looks at him. “We got the suit.” Tony’s entire body crumples and he leans against the bar, eyes narrowing on the marble swirls. “She may have been your sister, but she wasn’t invincible.”

“Don’t talk about her like she’s dead!” Steve sees the swing before it makes contact and he ducks underneath, bringing Tony into a crushing hug. “She’s not dead. She’s my baby sister, she’s not dead.” Steve doesn’t say anything, but the man seems to wilt in his arms as another hand touches his shoulder. Bruce sends a tight-lipped smile before slipping between the two and hugging Tony tight. The blond pulls away.

“Thor, get the suit,” Steve whispers, turning to the god. He’s uncharacteristically quiet, nodding and uncrossing his arms to go retrieve the cargo they’d received a week ago. Maria Hill had it delivered in an unsuspecting box outside of Stark Towers, with a touch ID that only Tony Stark could bypass. Inside, the melted, burnt, broken remains of what is left of your mechanic suit. Half a gauntlet, blasted metal, shrapnel and bloodstains. That’s all they have left of you.

Tony takes out your helmet. There are ashy streaks where the explosion had damaged the metal, and there’s a huge crack up the left side of the mask until where the eye used to be. A hole is punched through, the wires poking out, and blood where something had dragged over your mask.

“J.A.R.V.I.S., connect A.N.A. to the servers.”

“Right away, sir.”

“Good morning, Mr. Stark.” A new voice echoes throughout the penthouse, a subdued female who sounds like she’s seen better days. Steve catches Tony’s weakening smile. “Is there anything you need?”

“You have the recording for… for her last day?” Bruce asks quietly.

“Mr. Stark?” A.N.A. seems to wait on Tony for confirmation and he nods.

“Go.”

The helmet lights up and Tony places it on the bar counter before heading down to the couch with the rest of them. Natasha rubs his arm, leaning on her other elbow and hiding her mouth behind a tight fist. Thor closes his eyes, listening as intently as he can. Bruce paces back and forth and Steve just waits on Tony.

When they reach your agony, your screams, your relentless sobbing for death as you sink into the Potomac, Tony tells A.N.A. to turn it off. There’ll be two funerals, they decide. The public memorial and one just for them.

.

“You dealt with my sister’s potty mouth and you yell at me about language?” Tony asks over the comms. Steve groans on the other end, and he’s surprised by how easily he can mention you. It doesn’t hurt as much. “I literally can’t get over it.”

“It just slipped out, Tony,” he replies.

“Well, I bumped into a forcefield, so I had a reason.” Tony’s senses are on high alert. The Enhanced is MIA and his eyes scan the area. 

“Keep your eyes on the prize, Tony. The sooner we get out of here, the sooner we can head home and debate about it.”

Tony pushes on the secret door, letting out a silent ‘yay’ when it gives, sliding into motion.

“We have a second enhanced. Female. Do not engage.”

Walking down the staircase, Tony’s nerves shoot. Something about this place seems off. The staircase expands as he gets to the end, leading through a dark hallway lit by the occasional lamp that looks like it hasn’t had its oil changed since the 80’s. Grimacing, Tony continues on his way. It’s enough light to let him see ahead and if he needs the suit, it’s just seconds away. The hallway opens up to reveal a huge underground laboratory, and Tony’s eyes widen, gaze drifting up as he takes in the magnitude of this room. It’s a huge construct, with metal catwalks and staircases. A Leviathan is hoisted in the air by wires and he blinks.

“Guys, I got Strucker.”

“Yeah, I’ve got… something bigger.” There are benches full of forgotten projects or ones half-done. An Iron Legion robot lays on one of them, illuminated by pale yellow.

Shit. He wants to get out of here and back to the team, but it’s too late now and he has a job to do. His eyes drift over the robot again, seeing if he’d know what they needed it for. Experimentation? Curiosity?

Parts. He can see it in the delicate way it was taken apart, by someone who knows their way around this kind of stuff. This isn’t some ten year old who’d torn it apart for the sake of curiosity. No, this is surgery.

Tearing his eyes away, he turns to look at the triple row of benches under what looks to be operating room lights. Something gold and red glimmers underneath the light but he can’t risk getting unfocused.

The blue glow of Loki’s sceptre reminds him of why he’s here, and he goes to it. Electricity crackles around it, tools and half-made but quality gadgets used to stabilize it. There are monitors reading the levels it’s giving out, fluctuating as Tony steps closer.

“Thor, I got eyes on the prize.”

“Tony?” Turning around at the sound of a voice — the voice, your voice — Tony’s eyes widen as the Leviathan jerks into motion. Letting out a scream, he flinches away, his mind reeling back to that wormhole in 2012. Panic seizes him, his lungs constricting and his heart beating in time with the pulse in his head as he turns to watch it go, flying above the rock steps occupied by some bodies.

Bodies he recognizes.

Bruce’s Hulk body twitches as the last of his fight leaves him. Spears come out and go into him at all angles and he lets out a painful whimper. Natasha’s broken arms and legs stretch and twist in awkward angles as if she’d fallen to her death and every single bone in her is shattered. A pool of blood spreads beneath her head and her eyes stare sightlessly at him. The rock ledge is slick with red, flowing down in a tiny trickle towards Clint. For a moment, Tony thinks he’s alive, and he nearly calls out his name.

Then his head dips and lolls, and Tony knows. Thor’s neck is gashed to the bone, but his blood has dried and Tony’s breath catches in his throat. The few things that can kill Thor aren’t even possible on Earth, and Tony takes a step towards him just as his gaze drops. Steve Rogers lays there, bruised and battered with a shield snapped in half.

Half of him knows this is a vision but the other half is trying to rationalize it. Whatever is messing with his head: transmittable by air, powerful enough to warp his reality, and potent enough to capitalize on pre-existing emotions. Tony jots all this down in his mind as he desperately tries to pull himself out.

Not real, not real, not—

“You could have saved us.”

“Ant? Is it really you?” Spinning around, he comes face to face with you. You look more than a little worse for wear, and he touches your face, unbelieving. Searching your face, he just sighs and kisses your forehead. “Tony, oh my god.” Letting out something between a sob and a chuckle, he rubs your cheeks with his thumbs. Your hands cup his face and you cry out, hugging him tightly.

“Y/N, you’re okay.” He takes hold of you by the shoulders, taking in your features as his fingers brush over your cheekbones. 

“Hey, Tony,” you whisper. The skin peels away underneath your eye in the shape of the crack of your mask as he touches your face, peeling like wet tissue and he lets out a shout, pushing back. The flap of skin continues to fall, tearing away your face and blood flows down the gash as your eye closes. Scarlet tears flow your cheeks. “Tony, it’s me.”

“Y/N, no….” You reach for him still, trying to understand why and Tony can only back away. You’re dressed in tattered clothes, all bloody and burned — the clothes you died in and there’s a gaping hole where your abdomen should be.

“Tony?”

“It isn’t you.” The ugly pulsing burn on your side is black and white, your arm mangled beyond repair. “Stop…”

“Tony, what’s wrong?” You run to him when he trips over the steps of the rocks and you pull him up. Blood runs down your neck, drying dark and thick. Your eye opens again. With a pitch black pupil, only a green synthetic outline stares back at him.

“You’re not real!” Flinging your arms off, he stalks past you and searches for the sceptre. “You’re dead. I buried your empty casket.” He takes in his surroundings, his back to the pile of dead heroes. If he doesn’t acknowledge it, it’ll make his mind realize it isn’t real. If he finds the sceptre, he’s out of here. It’s the sceptre messing with his mind. That’s it. Find the sceptre.

You stumble after him but he ignores you too. His heart tears in half as he ignores it and tells himself that you’re dead. He forces himself to think of that cloudy day and that empty casket. They buried your suit and your favourite books for you to read in whatever afterlife. It’s been a year. You’re dead. 

A vibrating hum catches his attention and he freezes. Closing his eyes, he tries to hone in on the sound.

“Tony, please! Look at me...” A hand clutches at his shirt and he whips around, prepares to scream for his mind to shut up. The words die before he can speak. There the sceptre is, with the monitors and stabilizers and everything. No dead bodies, no blood on his hands. But the hand is still there. A sobbing pile is at his feet and a pale hand grasps his shirt, and his breath catches when the sobbing pile cries out his name. His stomach twisted, bile crawls up his throat when he sinks to his knees, collapsing before it. His hands shake and he feels his heart steadily climb towards the spectrum of beating so fast he isn’t sure he has a heart anymore. His blood mutes his frantic thoughts, and he, lightheaded and dizzy, pulls the hands off of him. They’re shaking but he isn’t sure if it’s him or… or you.

“Tony, please look at me. Tony? Tony, it’s not a vision, right? I’m, I’m not seeing things, again? Tony?” Your voice under your breath mutters these heartbreaking things that Tony lets out a breathless laugh of pain, and he tilts your chin up to see you. It can’t be you. You, with the exploded armour and bloodstains. You, who’d died by S.H.I.E.L.D. It can’t be you. A shaky hand reaches for your chin, and he feels the hot tears dripping off your skin as he angles your head to the light. Your eyes are wide and sunken compared to the rest of your face and your lips are dried and cracked. Your hands are calloused, dirty, your fingernails chipped, your skin raw and red and blistering. It can’t be you.

But it is.

“Yeah, Y/N, it’s me.” Your eyes widen and you stare at him as if you’ve just noticed him for the first time, and you let out a loud sob, covering your hand with your mouth as he lunges into you, holding you as tight as he can. You’re so real and warm and you’re hugging him back even harder if that’s even possible as he sniffs back his tears.

If this is a dream, Tony doesn’t want to wake up.

“Tony? Tony, you found me. I told them you would, but obviously they ignored it, because you’d never stop until you did.” Tony’s heart races back to the other end of the spectrum. The not-beating side. The side riddled with guilt and grief and pain that he thought he’d moved past but here, in your earnest view, it all comes rushing back. “They, they kept me here to work on the staff, but… you found me.” You bury your face in his neck and he kisses the spot before your ear, looking at the staff with wet eyes. Blinking, he lets the tears that fall, fall freely. “I thought I was dreaming when I heard your voice. It’s been so long. Tony.”

You break down into tears as you melt into his arms, slouching all over him. He holds you up in his embrace and your knees drag over the floor as you wrap your legs around him. He pulls back and sits on his bottom, holding you in his lap like he did when you were a kid after a nightmare. You latch onto him like a koala, and he sighs, eyes closing.

“I’ve got you, sis.” Running a hand over your hair, he realizes with a pang how thin you are. You’re all bones and not a lot of meat, and your spindly fingers are grasping onto him so hard that it hurts. But pain’s good. Means it’s more likely to be real. “You’re safe now. I’ve got you. We’re gonna get you outta here. I’ve got you.”

The comm links are active as Tony buries his face in your greasy hair. You smell awful, but underneath it, you smell like you. 

“Guys, we’ve got a plus one.”

.

“Hold my hand, Steve.”

“Why?”

“Because I said so.” He nods, as if expecting your answer and you sit across from him. Reaching over, the man holds your hand across the conference room table. Tony situates himself in the corner, and you already know what’s coming. You just need to gauge Steve’s reaction when it’s presented. 

As images of every global instance of destruction flickers across the screen, you feel something within you twist harder. Washington, D.C. Steve’s grip intensifies, nearly crushing your hand until you give him a gentle squeeze in reminder.

You open the first page of the Sokovia Accords. His thumb traces soothing circles over your skin while you flip through the pages. Your cybernetic eye scans each one, gleaning the important info for you to review later before you hand it off. 

Since your return to civilization, you’ve updated and replaced the tech H.Y.D.R.A. used to keep you alive and functioning with improvements that are far more befitting of you. For one thing, your cybernetic eye they used to replace the one they gouged out has a link to the earpiece, allowing you near 24/7 access to A.N.A. For another, you’ve improved mesh camouflage. After all, the scarring around your metal abdomen is kinda unsightly for undercover operations. 

Still, this isn’t how you wanted to go back into the Avengers. After Tony’s BARF showcase at MIT and the announcement of the September Foundation Grant, you had felt the shift in Tony’s energy. From generous and giving, to guilty and heartbroken, you knew something had happened when he went to the bathroom. Still, he probably didn’t want to talk about it.

So you took the jet back to New York for an emergency Security Council meeting with Secretary Thaddeus Ross. 

Tony watches as you hand the Accords to Steve. Sam refuses to look at it, and Steve only lifts the cover to humour you. You know him. 

When Secretary Ross leaves, the rest of the Avengers follow suit soon after, but not before your brother kisses your hair and rubs your head. They all head out to see the Secretary off and then meet in one of the many lounges in the facility. All of them except Steve.

Steve pulls his hand back to open the thick book, and you swivel the chair to face him fully. He reads the first page and you watch as his expression tightens, lips pressed together, eyebrows furrowed.

“Steve,” you whisper and he looks up at you. Instantly, everything relaxes. His shoulders slide down and he even manages a small smile.

“I don’t like it so far,” he tells you. “Sacrificing our right to choose is too dangerous.” He lifts the Accords half way, scans the pages, and then lets it drop again. He rubs his hand over his face, looking older and tired.

“Well, we can set up safeguards, can’t we? Once all the publicity dies down.” You reach for his hand, and he takes hold of it again. The warmth of him soothes your nerves and he instantly begins rubbing your knuckles. Habit, you suppose.

“But what if this panel doesn’t send us where we need to go? What if they send us where we aren’t needed? Y/N, we can’t be run by some panel who doesn’t even know us.”

“I know. You know I know what happens when corruption begins to spread. I’m sure we’ll be able to have some say over this.”

“Agendas change.”

“And what if our agendas change, too?” you ask quietly. Steve’s head snaps up and you lean forward, squeezing his palm. “I’m not saying you or Tony. I know you try your best. I’m saying when we’re all gone, what happens if the Avengers are run by people who don’t have the same ideals?”

“That’s a far off possibility.”

“But it’s still a possibility.” You stand, smoothing your hands over your pants and adjusting your vest. You realize somewhere that you’re dressed exactly like your brother, but you ignore it. The two of you can’t help but be fashion icons. Walking around the table, you sit on the surface next to his hand. “I don’t like it either, so I’m not going to sign.” Not yet. “But, Tony wants to. So we’re gonna have to talk it over with the team.”

Steve leans back into his chair to look at you. “I can’t sign this, Y/N.”

“I know.” You pull him up to his feet and smile as he brushes hair away from your face. “I know, baby.” You pull him into a hug and he sighs, nuzzling into your neck. Pulling back, he sighs again and brushes his thumb over your lips as his gaze searches your face. He takes you in like he’ll never see you beside him again and you do the same, just trying to burn his face into your memory. 

“These Accords might ruin us.”

“Not if you don’t let it.”

“Tony wants to sign.” Steve lets his head drop and the hands you have on your shoulders press down. Your thumbs dig circles into his muscles.

“Not if we convince him not to.” You send him a smile and he cups your face. “We’re really lucky, Steve. Really lucky. We got a second chance. This past year has been hell for the both of us, but we got our chance.”

“At what cost is it to keep us together? I can’t just pretend I agree with this. If I see a situation pointed south, I can’t just ignore it.”

“I know, baby. Tony knows it too.” Your hands run down his chest and your fingers tangle together. “This is our family. Just, remember that.”

“I know.” Leaning over, he kisses your cheek, although you yearn for it somewhere else, and pulls away to go to the lounge with the Accords. You sit there on the table, alone, watching him go, with that feeling in your heart just like the one in 2012.

Just like the one in Washington.

.

“Take one more step, and I’ll be sending your brains to Wilson.”

Steve freezes. The words, tossed so poisonously against his back, make him stop and he swallows through his bruised throat. He doesn’t want to look at you. He can’t look at you after what he’d done. Rhodey shattered, Tony somewhere trying to fix the mess he made. But he couldn’t regret choosing Bucky. Still, he just wanted to make sure you were okay but you’d woken up and grabbed your gun as quick as you could, standing despite the ringing that must’ve been going on in your head.

“You don’t walk away when I’m talking to you, Captain.” 

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” Without the shield, he almost feels naked under your piercing glare. He knows that if looks could kill, it wouldn’t have mattered if he had vibranium between you two. “You know what you mean to me.” The gun cocks and he hears the safety switch off. Your finger rests over the trigger.

“Secretary Ross charged me with finding you. Tony asked me to bring you in peacefully,” you whispers. Your unsaid words hang in the air instead. Not more than Bucky. Never more than Bucky. Bucky who killed my parents.

Bucky who didn’t know what he was doing.

But he killed them.

And Steve knew.

After Secretary Ross assigned you with bringing back the fugitives, you’d refused at first. 

“I don’t work for organizations like yours,” you said.

“Y/N, if you don’t go, we don’t know how many people will get hurt when they get in his way,” Tony said. 

“I’m only going for you,” you said.

You knew Steve wouldn’t let his team rot on the Raft for so long. It was only a matter of time before he came to rescue them, and that was where you came in. You know his mind, and it almost kills you, knowing that in every circumstance, he would’ve always chosen Bucky over you. 

Steve was always the better hand-to-hand combatant between the two of you, but Natasha had taught you some new moves before she’d gone and disappeared without a trace, too. You had him pinned underneath you, and a part of you knows that he’d only let you win because he didn’t want to hurt you. Before, it used to be funny. You used to spar, and you’d pin him down, or he’d scoop you up in a hug. Before, it used to be fun and flirty, and you two would make smoothies after. At least, before everything that had happened.

No such kindness is in you now.

It wasn’t in Sam either. The man had knocked you out with a fire extinguisher, leading to their escape.

Until now.

Steve had dragged you to the little skipper he’d used to sneak onto the Raft, scared out of his mind for the concussion you now sported. But it didn’t matter. Despite the dots nearly blacking out your vision, you know if you pull, it’d hit Steve and come out between the eyes.

“Rhodey’s paralyzed,” you grit out, your jaw clenched so hard you’re sure your teeth will break, “because of you. How could you do this to him? To Tony? Especially after what happened last year? Tony… Tony’s heartbroken. You know that? He’s heartbroken.”

So are you. Steve knows how to read between your lines, even if some of ‘em are metal instead of flesh.

“Then, are you gonna do it?” Steve asks quietly. Golden light streams into the dark room, illuminating his broad shoulders and sifting through his hair, and you wonder if everyone else is asleep. That’s the only reason you can think of that’ll make him see you now. He’s always held these secrets. It’s a fucking shame you’re one of them.

It’s a fucking shame he hid the most important one from you. It almost makes you wonder if he ever felt anything for you at all. Life has been shitting on you.

Squinting your eyes, you try to ignore the blossoming pain in your head as you shake your thoughts away. He doesn’t even look at you. Coward.

“I want to,” you tell him, finger just barely pushing the trigger. You know how much pressure it takes to fire a gun “I really, really want to.” You half-laugh, half-cry, because of the pain in your heart and head. Who’s the coward now? “I didn’t know what to do.”

“I know.” Steve turns to you then, his normally-bright blue eyes hooded by the shadows of the rocking ship. You put the gun down, and it’s almost as if all the strength leaves you then, too. “I never wanted you to pick between Tony and I.”

“Why, because I’d pick Tony?” You sit back down on your bed again, and Steve shoves his hands in his pockets. Walking over, he angles his head to the spot beside you and you nod, reaching over to turn on the lamp. “Well, you’d pick Bucky so, I guess it’s even.”

“Y/N,” he begins but you hold up a hand as your eyes close. 

“Save it, Rogers. It doesn’t matter.” Your teeth clench together and the muscles in your jaw twitches as your eyebrows push down. All you’re trying to do is not cry at the thought of leaving him here on this ship. Taking a shaky breath, you blow it out as Steve puts a hand on yours. Your fingers slot together and you lean towards him until your head is on your shoulder. He tilts his head to press his cheek into your hair and your fingers play together as your other hand brushes over his calloused skin, broken along his knuckles where he’d punch your brother. “None of it matters.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. Something wet slides into your hair and you feel it drip down your skin. Placing your hand atop his, you swallow and tell yourself to get it together.

“The most ridiculous part of this whole situation is that I love you,” you tell him because there might never be a chance to tell him again. “Your best friend killed my parents. You beat up my brother and he’s back in New York, bruised and battered and heartbroken, and I’m here.” You raise your head and he turns to look at you. Searching his eyes, you find nothing but grief. He pulls away his hand. “I’m here, instead of there with him.” You laugh because it’s all so stupid and ridiculous. “I’m really here, fraternizing with the enemy.”

This is never how you imagined you would tell Steve you loved him. Never. The first time you tell him you love him is the day it’s over. Fucking poetic, isn’t it. 

“I’m fraternizing with the enemy,” you repeat. Steve’s your enemy. Steve. Your stupid dork is now the enemy of 117 countries and you. The realization slams into you like things you can’t name. Your eyes flicker close and a few tears slip out but you manage to suck the rest in. Steve lets out an exhausted sigh and it feels like you’re both bone-tired this days.

“Y/N, I never wanted this for you. I just wanted to keep you safe.” His hand rises up to touch your face but then he seems to think better of it and lets it drop again. You miss the warm, rough feel of him already and he’s not even gone yet. “If the U.N. did what H.Y.D.R.A. did—”

“I know. I…” You sigh, looking down at the slight space between the two of you. How easy it would be to close it if it were a different time. “It was never a choice between you and Tony. It was a choice between Tony and what I believed in, and I believe in you, Steve. I believe that organizations like S.H.I.E.L.D., like the World Security Council, like some U.N. security panel, can’t be trusted.”

“Then, why? You know what organizations can do. You know that agendas change.”

“We’ve already lost so much. We’ve had too many casualties.” You cup his face, smile bitterly, try to make a joke out of it that you know won’t land. “I was one of them.”

“You can’t say that,” Steve says, turning his face away and you swallow the knot in your throat. 

“Why not? It’s true.” The most horrible thing you’ve ever seen lays within Steve’s eyes in that moment but you move on. “The Accords are still gonna pass whether you’re there or not. It’s a matter of safety, now,” you whisper and his gaze darts to you. His eyes ask a silent question and you dread the answer. “I’m gonna sign. I need to do my job, Steve, even if it means working for some higher power. There’s no other way.”

“So you’ve picked a side.” The distance between you is immeasurably wide, and you wonder how such a huge distance can be fit in such a tiny space.

“Yeah,” you whisper, “I’ve picked a side.” Steve’s face twitches and you take in his sculpted lips and cheeks, his blue eyes that reflect the lamplight and warm golden hair. “Steve, all that matters is we know what we are.” 2012 feels so long ago but it makes you feel younger when Steve tries to smile. Then, he looks down and you have a feeling he can’t even look at you.

At first, you think it’s because you disgust him. It’s not the first time you’ve thought such a thing, but then you realize. He’s terrified of watching you fall out of love with him.

How much you want to tell him that it isn’t possible. But you don’t. You can’t say a thing.

“But you’ve chosen a side,” he replies quietly, almost accusatory if you didn’t know him better. You close your eyes for a moment at his words, and then you turn away. The light is blinding in the hallway, but it’s better than looking at the heartache in Steve’s face. Tears slip down your cheeks as you stand and take the gun.

“You chose yours first.”

Tags: @teawithbucky @jcc04220 @shenala​ @dulharpa

[waitingissuchpain]

In Consult - Chapter 2

Characters: Jungkook, IU, OC, Lisa

Genre: Slowburn, Office!AU, Angst, Fluff, Mentions of Smut

Pairings: Jungkook x Y/N, Jungkook x IU

Chapter 1

Plot: Eri Kim. A 20-year old fresh graduate who got accepted into her first job as a process executive. Once she was introduced to the production floor, there she met Yukio Mita. A tenured agent who was assigned to help the new hires out, including herself. Slowly as time goes by, Eri found herself being attracted to Yukio. Seems harmless right? That’s when she realizes Yukio has a girlfriend. Would she continue on with her feelings or should she back off?

New faces. New clothes. New surroundings. Seeing handbags and sophisticated things in their hands instead of piles of readings and a backpack is so weird to me. They all look so… serious and mature. Am I really in the right place? Thank God I’m with Hisa. Grinning at her widely as I tug on her sleeve. “You ready?” I ask as Hisa grins, shaking her head softly as he sighs. “Lets get it on bitch.” 

Walking straight inside the building, being greeted warmly by the staff as we both grin widely, saying our hellos loudly as we giggle, running inside to the hall where we’re going to have our first few orientations from the company. 

The start was already going so good. Just when we thought it couldn’t get better, we thought wrong. Walking into another building, seeing the biggest search engine in the world’s logo in the lobby of the office made my jaw drop. Holy shit, it was real. It wasn’t a scam. 

“Ya.. this is the real shit. Can you imagine we’re going to work at this kind of place?” I mumble a whisper to Hisa, who was equally checking out the place, nodding slowly. “Jackpot.”

Imagine getting any better than that? Huh. The following week, we went to another building. They said this is where we’ll work. And might I just say, Holy Lord God did I save a whole country in my afterlife to deserve this kind of work and workplace? Jesus Christ.

The smell of fresh lavender engulfing my nose as we walk around the lobby of our building, seeing the fun and quirky seats on the sides and the big sign of “Diagonally” on the receptionist’s desk. The staff smiling widely as we were escorted to the conference room, it didn’t even look like a conference room at all. It felt like a theater if I were to be honest. 

“Working here would be a fucking dream.” I mumble loud enough for Hisa to hear. “I know.” She replies. And then our trainer came in, introduced herself and I’ve never had a more friendly trainer in my life.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Being able to work in one of the biggest and most prestigious companies in the world, it’s expected that the training period would take forever. Thank God our trainer was kind enough to teach us everything there is in the easiest way possible. She made us understand clearly every lesson and tool we were to use at the production floor, where we’re going to work. 

We were already enjoying the time we spent with each and everyone in our wave. Our trainer, even the room where we’re always at. We were starting to get comfortable - well at least I was. I had people I can call as mom and dad, a few pairs at least. But before we knew it, we were being sent down to the production floor for nesting. You can call it as a trial period to see if you’re fit for the work given or if you’ll have to say goodbye. 

Nerve-wrecking. Anxious. Everything negative I was already feeling it. Do you know that feeling when your gums suddenly gets so itchy you can’t do anything about it? Yeah. That kind of feeling. God, we were going to be put to the test, whether we’re worthy enough to handle cases or are we just not for this job.

First day at the job, even though I was part of the less fortunate people in our wave who only had one day of rest for that week, I was excited and scared at the same time. A part of it was because Hisa’s schedule is different from mine. Separation Anxiety? Maybe. Walking into the office, all dressed up and had a smile on my face as I greeted the security guard before finally entering the production floor. Hm, Odd enough there wasn’t many people present that day - well it was a sunday so I guess it’s understandable. 

You know those typical scenes in the movies where everyone’s rushing to get the papers off their hands, or when they’re running around the floor trying to read the papers they had as quick as possible while drinking their steaming hot coffee? Yeah i didn’t see that in our office. It’s a lot more… chill here. 

“Wave 48?” I was taken back to reality when a girl with pretty highlights on her hair and comfy clothes called out our wave, smiling widely as we all walk towards her and two other guys beside her, greeting them a good afternoon since it was almost going to be 2pm, start of our first shift. Our first day. 

“Okay, so just look for an open station where no one’s assigned to and go log in. Once everyone’s settled we’ll be starting the shift.” She explains with a smile as we all disperse to look for a place we’d be comfortable in working at. Settling for a seat close to the window just because the view looks so gorgeous. Something I can look out at when I already feel stressed from the cases I’ll be receiving. 

It’s been about fifteen minutes since I’ve logged in onto my laptop, just scrolling through the tools that we’ll be using as well as looking at my social media accounts here and there when the Production floor GC started to make noise. “Hello, I’ll be assigning 5 cases per person in awhile.” Someone said in the gc while we all acknowledged, waiting for the cases to load onto our laptops as I plug in my earphones, already opening up spotify to play some music to distract my nervousness.

“Don’t worry, you can ask us for clarifications before you send out the emails you’ll be composing. Just track them onto the tracker when you’re done and wait for our go signal.” They explained as we were all nodding and getting ready to show them what we’ve got. 

Actually handling a live case was more nerve-wracking than I thought it would. “Hey.. Queen. Are you ready?” I mumble as I grin widely, nudging her shoulder as she looks at me with a confused face. “Do you think we have a choice?” She spits back as I hum in agreement, leaning back to my seat as I see the queue on my laptop change. Fuck. I have cases now. 

Totally forgetting everything I’ve learned from training, I start to panic just from reading the first few lines of their issue. “Jesus Christ… why did I not listen…” I mumble against myself as I bite my lower lip nervously, sighing deeply as I shake my head gently. Re-reading the case as I get the things I need to take down to assist the person contacting us. Taking down notes on what to take a screenshot on, to see if they’re eligible for it, checking every little thing before I go and look for someone available to ask if what I did was correct. 

Biting my lower lip as I look over my friend, Queen, who was already stressing over her own cases I decided not to disturb her. Getting up as I look around for an available tenured agent to ask from. Almost giving up as I see the girl from before have everyone else surrounding her, I see a guy wearing a red jacket, a little on the thin side, maybe the same height as I am also very quiet. I also remembered he was with the girl from before, Cathy, yes. 

“Hi? Can I ask you or?” I mumble out as I walk forward, unsure if I should go on and ask him or not since he wasn't even looking at me. Slowly, he turned his head towards me with a neutral look on his face before nodding slowly. “Okay.. so he’s asking about having this official badge.. I’m not quite sure if what I’m doing is right so… can you help me out?” I ask as I try to walk back to my station, hoping he was right behind me as I sit on my chair, showing him the inquiry as he leans down, reading the query quietly, nodding. “Hm.. yeah. You can just take a screenshot of his homepage, as well as his writings to see if he’s authorized to these and then you can send the email to him.” He says quietly as he nods before walking back to his station. Already saying “Yes” to my case on the trix, making it good to go for sending the email. 

“That was easy.. I guess?” I say to myself as I send my very first email of the day. My very first email as an employee. I hum at myself as I take a look back at the matrix. Reviewer’s name: Yukio. So his name’s Yukio, nice to meet you Yukio. 

[swellwriting]

All or Nothing (Reader x James Potter)

Fandom: Harry Potter (Marauders era)

Pairing: Reader x James Potter

Warnings: ANGST but also cute ending yay

Request: may i request an angsty james potter imagine with a happy ending? the plot is totally up to you. if not that's ok. thank you!! x

Anon you are so polite how could I say no :)

Word Count: 2.2k

 When word got around that you were dating James Potter most people were happy it finally happened, very few were against it, or so you thought.

The most embarrassing moment of your life took place the following morning in the great hall while eating breakfast. You were surprised when you got mail as you hadn’t been expecting it, you were sat beside your boyfriend James and your other friends all around you.

When you saw the letter you failed to notice it was howler, you opened it and your mothers shrill voice, dripping with anger started saying the most awful things, you tuned out most of it but some of what you made out went along the lines of “MISS Y/N L/N, how dare you disgrace the family name by associating with a Potter, I am appalled you would not consult me first!” Your mothers cold tone continued. “You are to write to me at once explaining yourself and rid yourself of that worthless boy!” Your cheeks were burning red from embarrassment as James just stared at the letter closing it and putting it away for you. Sirius glared at every single person staring at your group until not one pair of eyes remained.

James tried his best to comfort you but you knew exactly what was about to happen, you would lose him, you didn’t even understand how your mother found out so soon, you hoped you would have some time to tell her yourself.

You grabbed the letter and crumpled it in your hands, tears streaming down your face as you tried to apologize to James. “I’m so sorry for my mother, I’m sorry for my whole family, I can’t believe she would do that.”

James just pulled your tear stained face against his chest, his calm heart beat instantly calming you as well. “Y/N, I like you for you, not for your family, I don’t care what they think of me as long as you want to be with me.”

-

That night after forgetting about the earlier events and joking around with the marauders all day you finally sat at your desk and started writing to your mother, pleading with her and saying how amazing James truly was, you sealed the letter and sent it to her using one of your roommates owl’s anxiously awaiting the response.

By the time you got to breakfast your mother had sent a new letter, thankfully this one was not a howler, you opened it up and started to read it, you couldn’t believe what you were reading and the tears came once again. James patiently waited for you to tell him what it said, but Peter was not so patient.

“What does it say Y/N?”

You looked up at them, wiped your tears from your face as James rubbed small circles into your back and said.

“I will leave out the cruel words and insults but basically she said that she doesn’t like the Potter family, although pure blood they are all Gryffindor’s and not a proper wizarding family, you know the usual. She has ordered me not to continue seeing James or I won’t be welcomed back home and she will know if I do because she knows people in the castle.” You paused awaiting their reactions, Peter ignored the first part and questioned.

“Who does she know in the castle?” Remus brushed his question aside and said.

“Not important peter, what else does it say Y/N?”

You continued reading over the letter

“It gets worse if you can believe that, I will quote her exact words” You found the part of the letter you were talking about and read.

“I know breakups can be hard but I have made the arrangements with a proper wizarding family and set you up with one of their sons.”

The group was wide eyed as they listened to you talk

“As you know Mrs. Black and I are good friends, and we have agreed that it would be beneficial for the both of you if you dated Sirius instead, this is an order Y/N, please do not disgrace the family name further and take this wonderful opportunity I have laid out for you to redeem yourself.”

Sirius looked as though he had seen a ghost and James was speechless, the other two marauders were visibly uncomfortable with the whole situation until Sirius broke the tension.

“What are we gonna do?” The word choice made James instantly mad.

“We aren’t going to do anything, me and Y/N will handle this without you Padfoot.”

Sirius put his hands up in defense and he pointed to his un opened letter from his mother on the table.

“Hey I didn’t ask for any of this , it is the first I’ve heard of it as well, I didn’t want to be brought into this.”

James was fuming with anger and you felt so conflicted until Remus carefully added himself to the argument

“I have an idea, if you want to hear it.” He paused taking your small nod as a sign to carry on talking.

“Well, this worked out well if you think about it we got lucky, she could have been set up with the Malfoy or even Regulus, we have the advantage of Sirius both being your best friend and obviously not wanting to date Y/N.” Everyone listened to Remus intently, you had a small smile on your face as you knew where Remus was going with this.

“All we have to do, I mean you have to do is make people think Y/N is with Sirius, I mean she is always with all of us anyways and you have the same room, you just have to cut out the PDA and make Sirius and Y/N hold hands and stuff like that so people believe it.”

Peter spoke up. “If we knew who your mother knew in the castle it would make this a bit easier.”

You spent the rest of breakfast and the entire day making this plan and thinking of everyone in the castle your mother could know.

The next few weeks were filled with awkwardly holding Sirius’ hand between classes when you wanted to be holding James and sitting in between the two of them at meals, always leaning towards Sirius a bit more.

Acting like you were with Sirius was hard but your mother had sent you another letter thanking you which obviously meant she was buying the whole plan.

This went on for about two months until you started drifting away from James, the constant hiding and sneaking around was one thing but him having to watch you do everything he wanted to do with you happen between you and his best friend of all people was starting to get to him.

You were lying in James bed waiting for him to get back to his room as he walked in the door seeing you on the bed, “Oh it’s you.” he didn’t seem very happy to see you.

“James what’s wrong?”

He was obviously agitated his words laced with spite. “Oh nothing I just expected to see you in Sirius’ bed.”

You were taken aback by his words and hurt. “James don’t be like that, you know I love you, and I don’t love the circumstances we are in but it’s better than nothing.”

James was staying on the other side of the room moving things around as to not look at you. “Is it really Y/N?” 

The words he spoke and the hate that filled the room made a tear fall from your eyes but you quickly wiped it away. “Don’t say that James.”

He quickly turned around and looked into your eyes before he spoke again. “I want all of you, all of this or none of it and if you can’t give me that, if you can’t be with me all of the time then I don’t want to be with you.”

The tears were uncontrollable now, they streamed down your red cheeks as you used your sleeve to desperately wipe them away. “James you don’t mean that please don’t say that.”

He just opened the door and stood there for a moment thinking before he decided.

“No Y/N I can’t do this anymore, I won’t do this anymore, I’m done, now please get out.” You quickly rushed out of the room bumping into Sirius as you left, he stopped and looked down at you, concern written all over his face.

“Y/N Hun, what’s wrong?”

You didn’t even answer him you just rushed to your room and stayed there for three days before you finally decided to go to class, you ignored the marauders as a whole and hated every time someone asked if you and Sirius had broken up, you wanted nothing more than to scream at them and admit that you were never dating in the first place.

Your mother wrote you a short and cold letter regarding what she must have heard, it simply stated

“Y/N don’t ruin a good thing, this arrangement between you and Sirius is not over, you don’t have my permission to end this relationship, me and Mrs. Black have already started talking about arranged marriage, don’t ruin this for us. And don’t eat too many sweets like you do when your sad it goes straight to your hips.”

You crumpled the letter and cried even more than before.

Not only were you dumped by your real boyfriend but you would have to continue to date your fake boyfriend and constantly be around James at the same time, you knew this would make getting over him so much harder.

The first couple days James didn’t even come around, it was just you Sirius and Remus, they tried to say James and Peter were doing an assignment but they knew you didn’t believe them.

You had to admit it was comforting having Sirius to hold you, even though it wasn’t real, you could almost pretend it was James, which you knew was so wrong and made everything so much worse.

Today you were sat in the great hall, Sirius had his arm draped over your shoulders as you leaned into his touch your hand resting on his thigh as Remus sat across you rambling on about your planned trip to Hogsmead this weekend.

That’s when you saw James walk into the great hall laughing about something with Peter, it was like he forgot you would be there for a minute until your eyes locked, he stopped walking and Peters smile on his face faded as he looked between his two friend’s sad faces. James turned to walk out until Peter stopped him by grabbing his arm. 

“James, it’s obvious you both love each other, stop ignoring each other just go run up to her and kiss her in front of everyone, screw her mom and her family, she’s not happy living there any ways, Just do it Prongs!” That was all James needed to hear, he didn’t want to be selfish but hearing the words come from Peter put things into a better perspective, it was true you and Sirius both hated your families and there was plenty of room at the Potter residence or the both of you stay in.

With the sudden boost of confidence, he walked at a fast pace towards you, you distanced yourself from Sirius once James first walked in because it reminded you that is wasn’t James sat beside you at all.

You stood up thinking James was coming to yell at you, James suddenly grabbed your face, placing his hands on your cheeks as he pulled your face towards his kissing you with so much desperation and need, it was rough but you missed his kiss so much you forgot you were standing in front of your entire school who frankly looked in shock.

You ran your fingers through his always messy hair your noses bumping as you pulled away pink faced with bright smiles on your faces. You didn’t feel the need to explain yourself to the students all staring at you rested your forehead against his. He finally spoke

“Y/N I’m so selfish, but I want you, I want all of you!” You just bit your lip and replied. “I’m all yours Prongs.”

-

Once summer came around and you got off the train waving good bye to Remus and Peter you walked hand in hand with James, with Sirius on your other side. You were going to spend the summer with a real family which was a first for you and Sirius who had both been basically rejected by your families after the fake relationship stunt.

You were happy for summer break for the first time in a long time , James was ecstatic to have two of his favorite people stay with him and you could tell by the gleam in Sirius’ eyes he was excited too.

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A Kingdom On Wheels The Hidden World

N the steps above the makeshift stables, the circus priest is getting nostalgic.

“I did a baptism once in Fort Worth, Texas. … I came in on an elephant wearing the child, which become four weeks old,” the Rev. Jerry Hogan says. “Now that infant is 15. I’ve married a whole lot of these youngsters and I’ve baptized their kids, and watched them develop.”

It’s past due April at Baltimore’s Royal Farms Arena, in the ultimate weeks of the Ringling Bros. And Barnum & Bailey’s “Out of This World” excursion.+

The closing-ever display is Sunday night time in Uniondale, N.Y.

The circus isn’t always worthwhile any extra, in line with the business enterprise that runs it. And specifically, as soon as the elephants had been long past — after public battles with animal rights activists — ticket income simply couldn’t preserve it afloat.

That manner the give up of the well-known journeying circus show, with a ringmaster and huge cats and clowns and trapeze acts … The stuff of nostalgia for generations.

But it’s the ease of a whole lot more than just a show, Hogan says.

“The overall performance is 2 half of hours,” he says, as horses are saddled and children carried beyond us to the nursery. “The circus is the whole revel in.”

It’s baptisms on elephants, pies within the face on birthdays, raising an own family on the circus educate as the American landscape rolls by. And it is fantastic acts of skill within the jewelry and outside them — a logistical feat polished over 146 years and making ready for the very last curtain name.

‘A metropolis that folds itself up like an umbrella’

“The Greatest Show on Earth” started out in 1871 as a visiting museum and menagerie under the imprimatur of P.T. Barnum.

In 1895, the magazine McClure’s wrote that “man’s intelligence has devised nothing more compact, extra orderly, extra admirably tailored to its purpose, than the train of an outstanding modern circus”:

“It is a state of wheels, a metropolis that folds itself up like an umbrella. Quickly and hastily every night it does the paintings of Aladdin’s lamp, picking up in its magician’s hands theater, resort, schoolroom, barracks, home, whisking all of them miles away and putting them down before sunrise in a brand new area.” More than a century later, little has changed. The circus nevertheless rolls across the country wearing loads of performers, stagehands, and kids in a mile-long train. These days, they name it a “city without a ZIP code.”

“It’s the most important theater performance in human history at the longest passenger train in human history,” says Rhett Coates, a behind the scenes team member, as he stands in a vestibule of the teaching. He’s labored off and on for Ringling Brothers because the 1980s and has an encyclopedic understanding of the circus trains

Reasons Why The Heavenly Kingdom Is The Best For Humans

Every a hit government ought to be absolutely capable of address the problems confronted through its topics. It is, however, regrettable to understand that the various kinds of government have failed as human beings in their try to arrest their maladies. Humans have attempted autocracy, democracy and different forms of governance, however, all of them have not been able to hit the needy spot of mankind. Thus, truly outspoken, people can’t govern themselves due to the fact we have been no longer given that responsibility by means of our author. Humans again then in the Garden of Eden had been assigned the task of taking care of the come what may lesser dealers, the animal kingdom. As for governance, it became entrusted to the strong and able hands of our author.

It is proper that human governments through the years have tried of their quest to improve the livelihood in their subjects. For example, a few governments to some degree provide food safety, satisfactory fitness care, employment, road networks and other sensitive needs for its human beings. Yet, human governments have failed in its attempt to rid our earth absolutely of struggle, famine, illness, unemployment, corruption, violence, and the apprehensive quit of man, demise. Thus, many human beings consider are beyond the abilities of people and it’s far perfectly proper. Imperfect as we are, we’ve barriers in connection with what we are able to do.

However, God is all-powerful, loving and ever equipped to address the ills of humans very soon. Through the Messianic state of His son, Jesus Christ, He has made plans to opposite matters as they have been before our first parents, Adam and Eve trashed human beings into the cold palms and slavery of sin and death. Why is this heavenly country in an effort to quickly govern the whole world the first-rate government for human beings? Every accurate authority needs to have charismatic and truthful leaders. Jesus Christ being the king of the heavenly kingdom is loving, kind and honest in all his ways. In truth, we are able to vouch for his superb developments by means of his dealings whilst he walked the earth within the Holy ebook, the Bible. The group or members of parliament who policies with him are loyal worshippers with integrity and apprehend the rigors of humans!

Moreover, because of the surpassing strength of Jesus Christ

He’s going to put to rest the difficult woes of humans like famine, illnesses, or even loss of life! While on the earth, he accomplished these responsibilities comfortably and love. Wicked folks who are corrupt and make our international a difficult vicinity to stay in will be destroyed for all time and people will now not want to quake with worry at night time or whilst walking in a remote place. God’s heavenly country guarantees a land of peace, good citizenry, pleasing employment and private refuge for all.

These and many other motives underscore why the heavenly kingdom surpasses all forms of human governments and is the first-rate antidote for pleasing every choice of mankind. Thus, we want to steer right ethical lives consistent with the standards and laws of our loving creator as spelled out in His phrase that offers the best comfort, the Bible. As we anticipate this glamorous country, allow us to vigorously marketing campaign for it to others thru the work of preaching to enlighten all of us approximately the mind-blowing heavenly state and what it’ll do for mankind. Doing this has a stake in our own survival. In truth, there is no form of the presidency that can ever come close to the heavenly nation that guy awaits!

The World’s Most Beautiful Bridges

They may be small or they’ll be large, they will be wood or concrete- but bridges are something that may be determined nearly anywhere all over the world. However, this newsletter makes a specialty of the bridges that make our heads turn round. These bridges are architectural miracles that simply have the capability to take our breaths away. So without in addition ado, we carry to you a listing of bridges around the arena which are just the element you need to go to. (Also, here is a seasoned journey tip for you – make sure you check out British Airways whilst you ebook your flights)

1. Brooklyn Bridge, New York:

Featured closely in many movies which include the famed Batman Trilogy, this bridge is a cable suspended bridge that paves the manner out of New York. It is thus far, one of the oldest and most complicated bridges of New York. The towers giving balance to this bridge are without a doubt manufactured from granite, limestone, and cement. The maximum awesome factor is this bridge turned into constructed in 1833 and is still surviving until nowadays.

2. Golden Gate Bridge:

This Bridge, additionally positioned in the United States of America, links the metropolis of San Francisco with Marin County and is a nicely diagnosed image of California and even the entire of America. This bridge is likewise covered in the present day wonders of the arena. Before the bridge become built, the most effective manner to journey among the 2 edges turned into using a ship. This bridge turned into constructed in a time span of four years. This bridge has additionally been featured in lots of films around the world.

3. Tower Bridge, London:

This Bridge is also an icon and worldwide consultant of the vicinity in which it becomes made – London. This bridge took eight years to construct and became constructed among 1886 and 1894. This bridge has two towers which had been linked through two walkways and consist of sections which might be suspended on both sides of the tower. These sections than in flip stretch toward the banks of the Thames. At the time of its construction, this bridge changed into the most important and most state-of-the-art bridge within the international.

Four. Sydney Harbor Bridge:

This Bridge becomes opened for public use in 1932. This combined with the Opera houses of Sydney are a chief cultural image for Australia at some point of the world. This bridge is known to host the satisfactory New Year Celebrations in Australia. This bridge holds the report for the arena’s biggest metallic bridge. However, it is not considered to be the longest. It took eight years to construct this bridge with a hard work of 1400 men.

Now that you understand the great bridges that you need to visit, it is time to percent your baggage and takes a journey to these top notch places. Also, make certain that on every occasion you are buying tickets, you check out British Airways to get great in relation to travel and airfare.

The Hidden Agenda

With his henchmen in the back of him, Donald Trump continues his sporadic, neurotic and self-causing behavior that typifies someone on the threshold. This wouldn’t be so terrible in itself but whilst we’ve got a President of the USA behaving as handiest the Trumpeter is aware of a way to do u. S . And the relaxation of the sector is starting to realize that this one character ought to, in fact, unleash untold harm to the republic of the US and could realistically shove this state towards global conflicts that might result in an international war. That being said the fact of the problem is history is already repeating. To understand that Trump’s behavior could be very similar to one in every of histories maximum diabolical dictators is a fact that can not be neglected any further. The instigator of the Holocaust and the mastermind of evil that ushered in World War II reminds us that history can and frequently does repeat with disastrous consequences.