#he looks like if you told an ai to generate a white boy

[incorrecttowerofgodquotes]

So the character art for the new ToG game came out and

WANGNAN WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU

[jellogram]

I still don't really know who jerma is. I'm pretty sure he's a streamer or something but I have no idea what he's known for or why he's given cryptid status. He looks like a morph of every white boy in the world. If you told me he was AI generated I would believe you

[primalsouls]

white rabbit pt 5

langa hasegawa x gn! reader ( pt 1 - pt 2 - pt 3 - pt 4)

anon: ⬇️

⚠️ : none.... I think? please let me know if there's anything to trigger!

theme: general

note: and scene. *bows* lol anyway, the fin to the white rabbit 🤧 thank you all for all the love you gave towards to white rabbit! i really appreciate it very much and it means a lot to me, really! 💖🥰 but like many great series, this one came to an end. it leaves an empty hole in my heart. 💔 but fr, really thank you. :) for all the love and support. i cant get it out enough. it just makes me happy how many people loved this work. ❤

like always, thank you for reading, i hope you enjoy it and like it, let me know what you think. and sorry for any mistakes, no proofread lmao. love you! 💚🫂

≫ ──── ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ──── ≪

A family would always be part of one's life. But does it had to be consistent of related blood? Or could it be just a person and their pet? Perhaps it could be a group of friends? Perhaps.

When family comes to mind, [Y/N] would be reminded of their father's neglect on them. Of a mother who abandoned them. Of their older brother wishing to do nothing with them but just get them out of the family. Of aunts who showed their "love" for them in a horrid way.

But now, when family comes to mind, they were reminded of a man and his adorable pet with pointy ears. Of a redhead who talks non-stop of skateboarding and his way of woodworking. Of a young boy who had a talent for talking to cats. Of a florist man who was a clown at night. Of an amazing chef and his good looks. Of a elegant man who had a love for his AI. And finally, of a young blue-haired boy who was silent yet talktive at the same time.

Who would had thought they would find another family that quick. It took time to open up, yes, but at a steady pace like they were learning skating once again was all they needed to build up trust and care for these people.

And even though they were banned from S, [Y/N] was not ban from skating and Langa made sure to bring that point to them. He thought they hated skating because of him but all they needed was a little time off before getting back on the board. Reki built them a customized skateboard that fitted their aesthetics. A street board decorated in black on top and white on bottom with red wheels. A cute white rabbit's head and its red eyes painted on the bottom largely like Langa's abominable snowman. Langa had asked Reki to make it and Reki didn't refuse. It was a surprise gift for [Y/N], Langa told him.

Ever since their friendship with Langa started on that day after weeks of leaving S, Langa stood by their side. He kept his promise. He never hurt them. If anything, his love for them grew. They went to the same school now. They ate lunch with the boys in the roof top. They skated together at the boys' usual hangout. And being kicked out of their old home, Reki's mother was happy to let them stayed until they earn enough money from working for Dope Sketch to live on their own place. It felt nice. The new changes. The environment was different from their old life with the Shindo Family. It was welcoming and lovely. No sense if hatred send towards their way. They liked it.

"Good morning, Reki and [N/N]!" Langa said, smiling a little when he saw Reki and [Y/N] skated down the sidewalk to the pole where Langa stood. Reki grinned and greeted his best friend, high-fiving each other.

"Morning, Langa!" Reki said brightly, getting off his skateboard. When [Y/N] catched up, Langa walked up to them.

"Mornin'..." [Y/N] greeted softly. They still weren't used to the presence of Langa and Reki and their personalities despite being friends with them for a few months now. They never had friends before. Kids they met during their childhood bullied them. Their brother never wanted to do anything with them, so a brotherly bond was never formed. Well, maybe they did had one friend and it was Tadashi. Like Ainosuke, he taught [Y/N] how to skate. But unlike their brother, they never made the effort to go up to Tadashi to spend time with him. They were younger, too. Too little to play with the older boys.

"Hey, earth to [N/N]~? Anyone home?" Reki waved a hand in front of their face, wincing when it was smacked away. "Ow! Langa's right, you do slap hard." The redhead complained, rubbing his hand as back away from the other. [Y/N] pouted as they glared playfully at Reki.

"Sorry... I was just... thinking, that's all." The [h/c]nette muttered as they looked down at the board steadied by their foot on top of it. Langa tilted his head.

"What were you thinking about?" His silk voice calmed them down whenever they heard it. It was soothing to their ears. It was one of the things they liked about Langa, along with many other quirks of his. Such as his baby blue eyes. They loved staring into them. They liked to run their hands through his soft, blue hair whenever they hangout on the couch, leaning against each other.

It was funny. How they instantly click. Already finding comfort in each other. A few months ago, [Y/N] hated Langa. Refusing to hangout with him. Skate with him. Talk to him. But little by little, Langa took his time with them and broke down their walls, leaving each space for them to feel comfortable with his presence. It was the one thing that made them fall for him. Whenever he smile, their heart beat against their chest like butterflies were inside. They had this tingling feeling in their stomach whenever Langa look at them. They liked this feeling. It was an unfamiliar one but they could get use to it.

"[Y/N]..." There it was again. Their name rolled out of his tongue. It meant for him to say their name.

"Ah, yeah... Um.... I was just thinking," [Y/N] cleared their throat, eyes looking down at the ground as they tried to hide their flushed face. "if we're gonna skate? Try for any new tricks?" They shrugged, glancing back up at the two friends quickly. Reki nodded with a grin.

"Of course, we're gonna! Langa still gotta nail that one trick of yours." Reki teased, nudging the other boy on the torso as he looked up at him. Langa pouted, earning a laugh from Reki.

"It's a hard trick," Langa started but closed his hands into a fists with a determined expression on his face and locked his eyes with [Y/N]. "But I'll try my best to achieve it, [N/N]."

A soft laugh caught the two boys off guard. They stared at [Y/N] with slightly wide eyes. They hardly hear them laugh, so it was a first time since they became friends that the duo heard [Y/N] laugh. And Langa loved it. Such as much as he loved every little thing about them. It brought a gentle smile to his face.

Their eyes locked once more. Both staring at each other with admiration.

"I can't wait then. Let's see you try to nail the White Rabbit's ticking curve trick." [Y/N] said. Reki chuckled, already getting a head start to the direction to the usual skating hangout. Langa turned to them, a hand held out. And without another word, [Y/N] took his hand in theirs.

No words were needed to exchange for the looks they gave each other were enough. Actions says more than words. And skating down the road, hand in hand, was enough for Langa to know they wanted to stay with him such as much as he wanted to stay with them.

The phrase to skate together with you didn't just apply to his friendship with Reki, but also applied to his new found relationship with [Y/N].

In the end, he caught the white rabbit and left the thorns filled hole of theirs, not bother one bit about the minor cuts he occurred. All he cared about was the white rabbit, who rested safely in his arms and shower by the love they had wished for.

A love they both could see growing as days went by.

[nctsjiho]

Still My Favourite

warnings: none

era: Fall of 2018

❀ JiHo reassures Jeno he’s still her favourite

It was cool fall evening, one of few where JiHo had some time outside of the company and more specifically the practise rooms. With more schedules coming up at the end of the year and the beginning of the following year, it was nice to take a little breather.

Currently, JiHo was sitting in a lesser known park in Seoul. It was one she had gone to a few times before when she was only a trainee. The park was such a nice place to be since the only people that really visited were older couples and very “to-themselves” individuals. The chance that she would get recognised was very small and even if she would be, the people usually didn’t care to point it out or make a big deal out of it. It had happened before with a girl close to her age, but she was so nice to just say hello and went on with her day.

Sat at one of the park benches, JiHo had her knees pulled to her chest. She hadn’t anticipated it getting this cold. It was bearable, luckily, but still she could feel the goose-bumps rise on her skin. Her shorter hair didn’t help the breeze from hitting her exposed neck and the simple leggings and black jumper really didn’t offer her much warmth. Fortunately she knew help was coming soon and the pieces of clothing at least created a barrier between the chilly air and her skin.

JiHo’s eyes wandered around the as good as empty park, peacefulness engulfing her. It was nice to be able to catch a breath and relax after a long week of practises.

So lost in her own thoughts it took the medium sized dog jumping up against the park bench and directly barking at the girl, for JiHo to notice there was a dog in the first place. At the sight of the dog JiHo immediately sat up. She didn’t quite know if dogs could look really happy or smile, but she knew for a fact that this dog was smiling at her. She didn’t hesitate to reach out for the dog and the medium sized pup had seen that as an invite to jump up into her lap.

Dog’s breath isn’t a nice smell, but it had been a while since JiHo had seen or hung out with a dog like this and so she accepted the excessive licking on her face with giggles and a big smile. “Ai- Yasu! No!” A small older lady came jogging up to JiHo and the beige, almost white, dog - apparently named Yasu. JiHo who was still laughing at the dog’s licks and the way they wiggled in her lap, held a hand up to the woman. “Don’t worry, I love dogs.”

The woman’s partner had joined the conversation, pointing out that their dog Yasu usually didn’t care for people so seeing him this excited was somewhat shocking. JiHo had taken it as a massive compliment and when the dog finally settled in her lap, she engulfed him in a big hug. Yasu placed his head on the girl’s shoulder and she could feel him relax.

JiHo and the dog’s owners continued their conversation asking what the girl was doing their alone. She eventually told them she was an idol - she didn’t bring it up at first and tried to avoid telling them but the older woman had a way with words which had her confess her profession - and how she wished she could have a dog. Their conversation was halted when Yasu had started barking. He was still looking over JiHo’s shoulder a growl coming from his belly.

The young idol looked back to see who was approaching and when she noticed who it was she started reassuring the dog. “Yasu, it’s okay, it’s my friend.” She told the dog sweetly while petting his back. “Jeno! Come here!”

Jeno had left about 5 to 10 minutes earlier to get some food at a nearby convenience store. He hadn’t expected to come back to JiHo with any company, let alone this much and company of this kind. Jeno sat down next to JiHo, placing the food behind him so the new 4-footed friend wouldn’t get to it before they could. 

“This is Yasu and his lovely parents.” JiHo started introducing. The older couple smiling brightly at the nice introduction, they were impressed by the young foreigner’s manners and social skills. “And this is Jeno.” She introduced to them. Jeno stood up quickly to bow at the elders and sat back down. He reached his hand out to pet Yasu, but quickly retrieved it when Yasu bared his teeth at him. He flinched to which JiHo quickly told Yasu that it was okay and that Jeno was a friendly person.

The 4 of them - well 5 if you count Yasu - talked for another few minutes before the older man spoke up. “I see your friend brought some food, we’ll leave you two alone now.” His wife quietly protested but he brought his arm around her shoulder pulling her close to him. “I know these children are really nice, but I’m getting jealous that your attention is only on them now. It’s usually only on Yasu so I want my time with you as well.” The wife blushed a little bit, called her husband a charmer and turned to the 2 teenagers. “Maybe we’ll see you here again some day. Enjoy your food.” Yasu hesitantly jumped of JiHo’s lap where he had made himself comfortable for the last couple of minutes upon his owner’s call. JiHo and Jeno bowed at them and waved the couple goodbye.

Once they were far enough away, Jeno moved the food between them. Surprisingly the heated up food was still warm enough to enjoy and the other snack foods were just amazing in general. “Yasu was really cute right?” JiHo inquired, shoving some of the noodles in her mouth. Jeno squinted his eyes and hummed reluctantly. It prompted a chuckle from the girl and Jeno sighed. “He didn’t like me.” “I’m sure if we had more time with him that he would warm up to you. His owner’s told me he normally doesn’t care for people anyway.” “But he liked you.” He whined.

The two enjoyed their food together, talking about random things, until dogs came up as a subject again. “I didn’t know you liked dogs so much.” Jeno said and JiHo sighed at that. “I never got to have one, but their were a lot in my area growing up. They’re 100 percent my favourite animal. I wish I could have one.” “Why don’t you get one?” It was so easily asked, but getting a pet took a lot of responsibility and time, time that JiHo did not have. “If I get one now, I know they wouldn’t get the attention they deserve.” A sad smile placed itself on JiHo’s lips and Jeno nodded understandingly.

Jeno and JiHo decided it was getting late and got up to leave. They took their trash and walked over to the trashcan, making sure they didn’t leave anything behind. Not dropping the previous conversation Jeno spoke up. “You could get a dog later? You know in a few years when you’re used to being an idol.” JiHo chuckled once he brought up the subject again. “Why are you so adamant about me getting a dog?” Jeno shrugged. “You just seemed so happy with Yasu.” It should’ve been a good thing, but JiHo wondered why Jeno looked a little down. “Are you jealous? Don’t worry you’re still my favourite puppy.” The girl teased and reached out to ruffle Jeno’s hair. Flustered the boy swatted away her hand and denied her statement. “I’m not jealous! I just think you deserve to be really happy and honestly I haven’t see you smile so bright and for so long as when you did with Yasu in your lap.” JiHo was moved by his words that held so much truth. There was something about dogs, or pets in general, that was so stress relieving. Dogs in particular just want to love and be loved and JiHo loved how pure their intentions were.

Some members had compared her to a cat since she picks and chooses when to be loved and when to give love. Though Yuta had taught her that receiving love, and particularly his, wasn’t really her choice to make. She just had to take it, but she didn’t mind.

Even though JiHo’s really sociable, she does like to have her time alone or at least be somewhere in the back were she can just observe what’s going on without having to be part of it. Her cat-like characteristics were very charming and they contrasted very well with the dog-like characteristics of some of the boys. It was a dog and cat kind of relationship which was adorable in the eyes of those watching.

Knowing that JiHo wanted a dog was surprising to Jeno. She never really brought it up before. After their conversation where she expressed how much she liked the animal Jeno made a mental note to always let her know if their was a dog nearby or send her some dog pictures and memes every once in a while.

“Well don’t worry about it Jeno. I have you and Jungwoo, two puppies is already enough for now.” JiHo smiled as she noticed how the boy wanted to retaliate but ended up swallowing his words. “Maybe one day I’ll get a dog.” She thought out loud which had Jeno, though he didn’t want to admit it, a little excited. “What would you call it?” JiHo acted as if she was in deep thought. “Hm... I don’t know, maybe... Jeno?” She trailed off and then looked at Jeno for a reaction. He didn’t look amused at the teasing in the slightest and brought a hand up to hit her arm, but she took of running. “Sorry not sorry!” “Come back here!” He ran after her. “If I get a cat I’ll call her JiHo then!” He yelled, not caring if anyone else could hear him.

[hwrryscherry]

The one when Y/N meets Harry.

 November 28th, 2017 - Shanghai, China

Today is the day. Today is the day you’ll be walking for Victoria’s Secret for the first time. Dreams do come true. You traveled all the way up from New York to Shanghai with some of your best friends after getting ready for this day for the past months. It wasn’t easy if you must admit. Having to follow a strict diet and working out almost every day was hard but being here today it’s totally worth it.

   ‘’Alright, it’s almost show time. I need everybody to be ready by minutes!’’ — The stage manager yelled while walking through all those tall ladies that were probably much taller than him. As usual, there’s going to be four segments and I’ll be in just two of them. At this moment, it’ll be the Goddess segment which looks completely stunning. You look around to see all those gorgeous women around me with their perfectly styled hair, beautiful golden wings and lingerie getting their final touch ups just like you are. You have no idea if it’s the amount of people around you now that are touching your hair, putting makeup in your face, fixing up the tiara or even if it’s the idea of having all eyes on you in just a few minutes. Of course, you wanted it to be perfect, it’s your first VS show and you can’t stand the thought of falling or anything like this.

You tried to calm down and focus on your breathing while staring to those extremely big screens hanged on the wall that showed the stage from every possible angle and you could totally notice that there was a lot of people out there.

‘‘I remember my first time too! I felt like my heart was about to leave my body’‘. Bella, that was right beside me getting herself ready as well.

 ‘‘Well, yeah! I’m one step to passing out now’‘. You joked while feeling this small woman finishing the touch ups of your outfit. It was stunning. There was a lingerie, of course, which looked like a white color but it was actually more into ai really light tone of grey. And they complemented it with a super long baby blue fabric over the lingerie. You had a super goddess like a golden tiara upon your head and some diamonds made up jewelry on your neck and years that probably costed more money than you could afford.

‘‘Romee! Where is Romee?We need Romee!’‘. The stage manager called Romee as she would be opening the runaway and you could see from the corner of your eye that she was almost running to get from the starting place. She literally looked like a Greek goddess with those beautiful long blonde locks and blue eyes. ‘‘Ok girls, I need all of you to get by your entering positions, alright?’‘ , by this phrase, all of you start to go to your marked positions. Yours was right before Bella which made you a little bit more confident because at least you had to do it with your best friend by your side. 

You stared again at the big screens in the wall that showed the stage, seeing that it was a little bit dark, there was a big structure rising up from the floor and apparently there was a band inside of it. Everything looked really well produced, and you really tried to recognize in some way the melody of the instrumental song that was playing to know who was the band but your mind was totally blank now. All you could focus on was that you were just about to realize one of your biggest dreams. You looked at the line of tall girls in front of you as you listened to a scream. You knew this song by the melody. You couldn’t believe your ears and eyes. It was Only Angel by Harry Styles, it literally was Harry Styles. For some reason the fact of knowing this song so well made you a lot more confident. He started singing and the stage manager told Romee to go when Harry sang ‘’Broke a finger, knocking on your bedroom door’’ and Romee started doing her fabulous catwalk. And then Laís Ribeiro entered with the fantasy bra, which it’s the million dollar bra from VS, again, probably more expensive that you could afford. By the time that Romee came back from the backstage you were just leaving.

Being there totally put your adrenaline levels the highest it has ever been. The light, the other models, the crowd, the song. Everything was perfect. You were smiling thinking to yourself ‘’please don’t cry, please don’t fall’’, but you manage to do it, one foot in front of the other and posture, you looked glamorous, mostly like what Aphrodite would look like in real life.

‘’I must admit I thought I'd like to make you mine As I went about my business through the warning signs End up meeting in the hallway every single time And there's nothing we can do about it’’

That was the part Harry had just song when you entered. Harry, of course, didn’t know you as you never talked before, except for that one DM. But he was stunned by the moment he saw you walking. He thought to himself how spectacular you looked as you walked towards him with that beautiful smile of yours.

‘’Told it to her brother and she told it to me That she's gonna be angel, just you wait and see’‘

Harry kept singing as you walked beside him. You looked at him and winked at the British boy as you held the baby blue fabric over you up to create a wing effect and Harry was just so caught up with the song and the moment that he kneeled down. Harry Styles literally got on his knees to you while signing those exact words:  

‘’When it turns out she's a devil in between the sheets And there's nothing she can do about it Hey, hey’’ 

You were surprised. Shocked actually. But the show couldn’t stop because you were flattered and honored about the fact that HARRY STYLES GOT ON HIS KNEES for you. So you kept walking and blew a kiss in the air to the camera started to walk back to the backstage when you saw your mom in the crowd looking extremely proud of her baby, you waved at her right before entering the backstage again.  

The models were all celebrating and hugging the others. In the moment you step into the backstage Bella came hugging you and you hugged her back. You feel so happy and pround of yourself for that. The camera focused on you guys as you looked to the camera and said ‘’It was amazing!’’. And it really was. Your heart was beating as fast as never and even the same small lady that was fixing your outfit earlier came to you and Bella saying ‘’Come on girls, you have to change outfits!”. You and Bella walked hand in hand to the appareal and only parted ways when had to change lingeries. This time Bella and you wouldn’t walk at the fellow segment and apparently has Harry’s again.

The lingerie looked different though, this one was a black lingerie with actual wings. Some beautiful and medium sized blue wings and blue long gloves. And again you were ready to enter the stage. Looking up to the screens as I was going to watch this time, the big structure was rising from the floor again and Candice Swanepoel entered looking fabulous, I mean, it’s Candace right. 

In general, the show was so good. He sang Kiwi, which is one of your favorites. You couldn’t stop singing at the backstage the entire time. And when the entire show was done and everybody was backstage eating pizza so you’re a hundred percent happy now, Harry was a little farther away from you wondering if he should go talk or not with you, even though he have this feeling that he knows you from somewhere and he just can’t remember where. So he decided he would come with the excuse that he thinks he have met you before. Harry walked towards you wearing a black suit with a pink shirt while holding a red cup with coke on. You were so focused on eating your pizza and didn’t even noticed the boy behind you, so he touched your right shoulder with his hand calmly while talking lowly ‘’Excuse me’’ as you turned out to look at him. You were still in your outfit except for those big blue wings that you had already taken off and at that moment Harry thought to himself about even though he had met tons of pretty women in his life but you were the prettiest. Everything about you was beautiful, your eyes, your nose, your lips and that smile you had held up in your face since the runaway. You were focused on his face too. You stared into his big green eyes and how they were sparkling in this moment.

— Hi! I... — He said, brushing his thought of his mind and held out his right hand for you — I’m Harry!

— I know!  — You told him shaking your hands with his as a meeting form, soon using the same his to grab one more piece of pizza  —  I’m Y/N! You were so great out there, really I’m impressed!

  — Oh  —  Harry said while exhaling a small laugh while analyzing your face to try to know with you were flirting, or just being nice. You were just being nice. Of course Harry is extremely handsome, but you really just think he’s being friendly at this moment.  —  So I made a good first impression then! That’s good.

— Excuse me? Of course you did! I love your songs, I’m like a super fan.  —  You told him being honest, you have been normally shy meeting new people, but something in how he acted and talked really made you feel comfortable straight away.

—  I’m flattered! — Harry said, putting his free hand over his clothed while closing his eyes and giving you a cheeky smile — So..Is this your first time in Shanghai?

—   Yes! I haven’t been to many places actually, just basic Fashion Week places by now, which I love of course! Is it your first time too?

— Actually yes! I’m on tour but me and my band mates are gonna take a walk through the city this night, you know, to have a experience  —  Harry explained to you and turned around a little to show you his band mates by the corner of the room where Mitch, Adam, Sarah, Naomi and Charlotte who were staring at you both indiscreetly waved as noticed that Harry were pointing at them. As the nice girl you were, you smiled and waved at them back before returning your attention to Harry  — Maybe you would like to come with us...If you want of course, don’t feel obligated to, please!

You laughed about his concern of making you feel obligated or uncomfortable about something and looked around searching for Bella through the room, you saw her talking with the other models and stared back at Harry.

—  I’m with my friend Bella and we kinda wanted to do the same thing so.. If it’s okay if she comes too, I really want to, don’t worry!   —  You were truthful, you and Bella really were planning to explore Shanghai through the night, but of course you wouldn’t go out in a city you don’t know with a group of people you don’t know. You truly don’t think they would be capable of causing you any kind of harm, but it’s always great to be cautious.

— It’s perfect! Let’s go then, do you want to go now or?... —  Harry asked tenderly while rubbing his multiple rings on his hand.

— I mean...I gotta put some clothes on, but we’ll do it now and we’ll find you guys here?  —  You said, putting a lock of your hair behind your ear before leaving your empty cup by the table beside both of you.

— Sure!

[gameclam]

this isnt an art request (it could be if you wanted to tho!), but a request to elaborate on your headcanons for the Gordons backstories? you seem to have pretty solid headcanons for their childhoods and im interested on hearing your takes on them :)

Oh yes sure! Okay so here they are (generally) in order, these are subject to change depending on au or like. how im feeling. Under the read more bc it's going to be long probably, bc i dont know how to summarize. This is specifically about Freemind/hl/hlvrai gordon as I don't currently have much ideas of Gorgeous's backstory at all.

TLDR: THEY ARE MESSED UP GUYS

I will also say tw's for neglect, child abuse, self harm and such else and transphobia and drugs and the like. All of them had abusive/neglectful parents, and their own mental problems growing up.

Hlvrai gordon; Gordon was born in May, he lived with his mom and dad, his mom is afrolatine and his dad is white. At some point age 5-6 he made a potato launcher and that's when it was found out that he was incredibly smart. For the first part of his life he lived in a Smaller town in washington where he didn't have many friends but at least knew other kids- he realized he was a boy at some point when he was 10 after learning one of his aunts was a transwomen, and he told his mom about it who didn't think he'd STAY a boy but she tried to somewhat support him, they didn't tell his dad bc his dad - while supposedly not transphobic was more traditional and wouldn't've wanted his kid to be trans. He called himself monster names to avoid using his deadname (using names like Rageblood and deathclaw (fave)).

He had trouble making friends outside of just like, people he sometimes played games with at school. Depending on au, he also made a friend age ~10, He met them in the woods and they were an alien child who was 'hiding'. This was Benry (AI versions def. didn't meet him most likely), who at the time, hadn't named himself, instead going by X or- due to gordon's influence, Screamsting. Sadly, somepoint 'round 13, depending on the AU, either Benry vanishes or Gordon moves to Seattle. Either way Gordon gets into a afterschool gifted kids class run by Black mesa, where he learns skills for his future. Gordon over the years focused heavily on Science, Aliens and invader zim, and neopets. He was basically a nerdy little guy for a long time (never changed). And he ran around alone in the woods behind his house a lot- until he moved anyway.

He didn't have a good relationship with his dad (who still believed like, spankings were 'helpful') and would routinely get into fights with him. In Seattle, Gordon had even LESS friends because he was new and awkward to the bigger city. In middleschool-highschool he, for a bit, tried to be an edgier kid, but gave up because he liked button ups a lot, he also joined a swim team at some point which makes him claim he was a jock in highschool. He met kleiner through black mesa's program and looked up to him greatly. He was pretty sheltered from the social aspect of his life leading to him being well, kind of a weirdo. When he was 17 he got into a pretty bad fight w his dad and basically kicked himself out. He later graduated and moved to MIT to continue his life, where he would then meet Kleiner and Coomer.

---

HL Gordon: Unlike Gordos he already lived in Seattle, He lived with his mom and dad- similar to HLVRAI gordon, His mom was white and his dad was afrolatine. They lived in a nice-enough house as his parents had alright jobs. Gordon was quickly, off, in his parents eyes, he didn't speak for the first few years of his life- later they learned he was partially deaf, but the hearing aids didn't get him actively speaking, so he learned ASL. They learned he COULD speak but preferred not to, attempts to force him to only made him freak out or completely not do it. He made a tennis ball cannon and they were like 'holy shit.' He got into a gift kid program much earlier. Gordon was often...neglected, his parents didn't talk to him much about things and he was often pushed to be great and not really allowed to be a kid, he was alone often or shoved onto other family who didn't care for him well. He didn't make many friends, but Gordon didn't mind (supposedly) as he didn't get along with other kids as he got to school, He was quiet, cold, and didn't feel the need to care or talk to others. They couldn't even communicate with him- this is where he showed early signs of Conduct disorder- which he was later diagnosed with, as well as autism and ADHD (much earlier diagnosis tho).

He began seeing a therapist age 8-10 but it didn't help too much, But Gordon wasn't stupid, his parents had started to become 'scared' of his cold nature. Gordon misconstrued as they were scared of HIM, and not of his problems. They never fully showed him the love or compassion he deserved. He often felt alone and unheard. He learned he was a boy but no one really- knew about it until he randomly told his mom age like 13, she didn't support this decision and told his father, neither of them completely supported him being trans. He didn't take 'no you aren't' for an answer, though. He began to use his Smarts to disobey his parents wishes, going past parental blocks and learning he had a love of horror movies, which they had forbid him from watching (they often stopped him from watching certain things), sadly after his parents reaction to his gender he'd start self harming as a way to release tension. As he got older he learned that boredom was the worst thing you could inflict on someone, and himself. He hated being bored, leading him to do more disobeying in small amounts as well as heavily focusing on scientific inventions he'd make at home. Gordon also began to mostly just focus on his studies and future in MIT, unlike Gordos he didn't try any sports, and didn't want to. Moving out of his house quickly after turning 18. After moving to MIT he actually met Kleiner who became somewhat of a parent towards him- one of the first people ever that he actively loved and cared for.

---

Freemind: Freemind lived in a trailer park in Seattle with his mom and dad, His mom was mixed women (White/black) and his dad was latino. Neither of them shared much of their cultures with him however, so he never really experienced much related to that aspect of him. His parents were abusive, full stop, They often left him alone (They hadn't wanted him, so they'd often leave to live their lives/party bc they would rather be living-young then caring for their son, either leaving him with like, baby sitters or just by himself once he was 'old enough' to make sandwiches or something). Freemind deep down knew his parents didn't really love him but at the time he didn't care, he got to do whatever he damn wanted! He'd run around his neighborhood alone for hours and he'd get to do whatever he wanted in his room or backyard. At age 5-6 he made a 'rock launcher' and got in big trouble for it, they knew he was smart now so he would get in more trouble for doing stupid shit. He was ALSO often placed into random family or family friend households at times (especially during breaks) even if he barely knew them, some were better then others. Overall his childhood was unstable, and he learned he loved aliens and horror movies (leading to his mild obsession with 'overthrowing' things)

The fact he was so-unwatched caused him a lot of problems during his middleschool and highschool years, they never checked in on what he was doing, leading to early substance abuse and self harming problems.

Freemind also didn't make friends much in school- he was kind of a bully and was often too crazy for other kids to handle. Freemind thought he was just a tomboy for a longtime, he found lots of shame in the realization he wasn't cis, thinking his parents would hate him even more... But they barely cared when he came out, To the point that it hurt him more, they didn't care that he was growing up, or becoming himself. He got into a gifted program a bit later then the others (about 13). Around 13 he started to make friends who weren't very nice, the other bullies. He'd never tell them he was transgender, even when he'd started transitioning. Around 16 he'd begin experiencing onset psychosis as well as mild delusions, which would only develop as his life went on. He was kicked out nearly immediately after turning 18, he'd live in a motel for a bit before he was able to move to Massachusetts. He didn't know he was Bisexual until AFTER college and sometime during his time at black mesa. Overall because of his childhood he became much more of an insufferable and weird individual. (this is also where he'd meet his friend Eddie)

[inky-duchess]

21 History Ancedotes for my 21st Birthday

So today I celebrate my 21st birthday and I have decided to gift you all with 21 of my favourite historical Ancedotes. Some are funny, some are sad and some are plain bizarre but I hope the make your day 💜

Mary Maloney, an Irish-born suffragette in England followed Winston Churchill around while he was campaigning for a seat in Parliament, drowning out everything he said with a very large bell and calls for him to apologise for his comments on women's rights and suffrage movements.

Clodius Pulcher was a well born Roman noble during the last day's of the Republic. He gave up his Patrician status to become Tribune of the Plebs (an office in which one had to be a Pleb) by being adopted by a much younger Plebian man who became his "father". Clodius was a bit of a riot, sneaking into religious festivals dressed like a woman to sleep with Caesar's wife, building a shrine to Liberty in the ruins of the Conservative Cicero, vetoed the last speech of one of the Consuls (who basically did nothing all year and was apparently going to roast Caesar) and burned down the Senate House with his funeral pyre (the Plebs who loved him literally tearing up the furniture to build his pyre). He was honestly the best fun.

When laying on her deathbed, Queen Caroline of Ansbach turned to her husband George II of England and told him he should marry again. George refused to ever wed again... But added he would have mistresses. Caroline said , likely with a roll of her eyes, "oh my god that doesn't matter."

Florence was a pretty cool city in the Renaissance until Savanorola came to town. He disliked the loose living artists that crowded the city, with their naked pagan gods and rampant homosexuality. He expelled them all with help of the French hoping to make Florence Holy Again. When the Borgia Pope excommunicated him and sentenced him to death, one man in the crowd was reported to have said. "thank God, niw we can return to sodomy." One Floretine man in the 1490s said Gay Rights.

So this list couldn't be complete without an entry of the only American politician I love, Alexander Hamilton who was just a walking entity of sass. I could go on about his sharp sarcasm or his disaster bi vibes with John Lauren's but my all time favourite Alexander Hamilton ancedote has to be this exchange with Thomas Jefferson "There are approximately 1010300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly explain how much I want to hit you with a chair."

Caterina Sforza was an Italian noble woman during the Renaissance. She was apart of the powerful Sforza family, which drew many enemies to her. One fateful day at Forli, Caterina's children were snatched as hostages. The besiegers threatened to kill her children if she did not cede the castle. Caterina refused, lifting her skirts and shouted to the besiegers that she had the means to make more children.

Hannibal Lecter's creator Thomas Harris was happy to end his great character's story with the original trilogy. However his publishers forced him to write an unneeded prequel explaining why Hannibal became Hannibal. Thomas Harris agreed lest he lose the rights to his character so he wrote Hannibal Rising, where Hannibal as a young man hunts down the Nazis who ate his sister with a katana.

Nell Gwyn is my favourite mistress of Charles II, mainly because of her sass. Once while trapped in the middle of a riot where Londoners swamped her carriage thinking she was Charles's Catholic mistress. She popped her head out the carriage and told the people "Pray good people be civil. I am the Protestant whore." She also dosed her rival Moll Davis with laxatives in order to free up some of Charles's time and she once flashed her underwear at the French ambassador after asking him why the Franch King did not pay her to spy on Charles because she was with him every night. A true Queen.

Emperor Ai of the Han Dynasty of China once rose from his bed to go do some ruling when he realised his lover, Dong Xian was sleeping on his sleeve. Rather than disturb his lover, the Emperor cut his sleeve off at the wrist to leave Dong Xian nap. Nothing has ever been more romantic than that. Y'all could never.

Princess Margaret the sister of current Queen Elizabeth II was a socialable Princess and often tasked to visit the up and coming music stars of the day on behalf of the Crown. When meeting the Beatles one evening, she noticed George Harrison was acting a little odd. When she asked what was the matter, he replied "We arent allowed eat until you go." Princess Margaret laughed and promptly left so the Beatles could get some dinner.

During the Siege of Jadotsville, Irish soldiers under the flag of the UN were attacked and besieged by local insurgents allied with the Katanga Regime. The insurgents numbered thousands while the Irish only had 158 soldiers, all who were lightly armed. They radioed to their allies assuring them that "we will hold out until our last bullet is spent. Could use some whiskey though".

Napoleon was famous for writing raunchy letters to his wife, the Empress Josephine while he was away. She used to reply with really mundane letters or not at all. She really just could not be bothered with him.

Josip Broz Tito was so fed up with Joseph Stalin sending assassins to kill him, he wrote to Stalin personally to say "If you don't stop sending assassins to kill me. I will send one to Moscow and I won't have to send another." It didn't work but Big Dick Energy.

Successful Roman soldiers returning from war often got to march along in parades known as Triumphs. During this, it was customary for them to sing bawdy songs about their commander. One surviving one about Caesar goes like this "Romans, lock up your wives. Here comes the bald adulterous whore. We pissed away your gold in Gaul and come to borrow more."

Matilda, Lady of the English was a woman so badass that history cannot handle her. She was the daughter of Henry I who left his throne to her after the death of her brother. She was away in France when her father died and her throne was snatched by her cousin Stephen. They battled back and forth for years with neither side ceding any ground. Matilda was once besieged in a castle during a snow storm, with Stephen's men all around her. Instead of fighting her way out. She simply donned a white cloak and walked out of the castle. Just walked out without any of Stephen's men seeing her.

Pedro of Portugal once fell in love with a beautiful lady in waiting called Inez de Castro. For years, they lived as man and mistress, popping out a few kinds. Pedro's dad really did not like Inez and wanted Pedro to find a legitimate wife so he had her killed. Pedro returned home to find the mother of his children dead. Pedro went a little crazy. He had all his father's assassins killed, ripping out their hearts as they had done to him. When Pedro ascended the throne, he demanded the Pope legitimize his children by Inez. The Pope not wanting to upset the King, said he couldn't because Inez was never crowned Queen. Pedro dug Inez up and crowned her as Queen, having all the nobility swear loyalty to her corpse. The Pope had no choice but to agree to his request.

A famously clever general once saved an entire city with an ingenious stragety to sit outside the city waiting for the attacking army to come. The attack had come to fast for the city to ready themselves for a Siege so, the general had to move quickly. He evacuated the city and took his place waiting for the army to come. The enemy forces stopped and took one look at him and bolted, thinking he meant to lure them in one of his famous traps.

Michaelangelo was really badly treated by the Vatican when he was painting the Sistine Chapel. He constantly fought with the Popes over the design and his work, which he was paid peanuts for. Michaelangelo got his revenge in his work, painting the gates of Hell behind the Papal Throne and an angel flipping the ol' fig (the Renaissance version of the bird) toward the Pope's chair.

Peter the Great was not a perfect guy. He kept serfdom as a practise in his kingdom, he had his son tortured to death and he could be an unpleasant guy. But Peter was a dreamer. He wanted nothing more to build a fleet for Russia and bring Russia beyond its borders. Peter took a gap year from ruling Russia to wander around Europe. When he stopped in England, he was granted Leicester House to chill in while he did his shipwright studies. It was here that Peter found a new passion. The wheelbarrow. Cue Peter and his new found English buddies drinking in Leicester House, punching the artwork and rolling each other around in barrels across the house's Great gardens.

Diogenes is hands down a walking shit post. He was a great thinker in Greece during the reign of Alexander but a rather dry, sarcastic wit. He lived in a pithos/a jar because he shunned all vanities and values of society. He trolled other philosophers, attending their debates to heckle them and eat loud foods through them. When Alexander the Great came to fan boy over him, saying that if he were not Alexander he would like to be Diogenes to which Diogenes just said "yeah me too, now get out of my sunlight."

Cosimo de Medici was the son of a Floretine banker with a great knowledge and love of art. Cosimo wished for Florence to release its potentially and join the Renaissance. He hired Filippo Brunelleschi to finsh the Great Dome of Santa Maria del Fiore which had láin unfinished for over a century, a symbol of a failure of ambition. The builders had lost the knowledge of creating a dome so large so it remained unfinished. Despite much opposition from the other nobility and denouncers of the Renaissance, Cosimo's dream of the completion of the dome was completed, making it the largest brick dome in creation at that time. There is nothing like achieving your dreams and certainly nothing like leaving a lasting reminder that screams 'I was right and you were wrong' to stand for centuries.

[hops-hunny]

Distance Makes the Heart Grow

CHAPTER 7

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Mafia Boss!Neville Longbottom x Reader

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: (Y/n) lives a normal life. But that’s the issue, it’s normal, it’s plain, and it’s growing boring. Everyday she wishes for something, anything to spice up her life. But, when her old school friend (and crush) shows up at her bakery with a new look (and what looks like a new life), what will it bring for her? Will their puppy love grow? Will his big secret lead to the end of them or will it spark a new beginning?

Warnings: mentions of insecurity

A/N: I love and hate this chapter so much

Although this trip wasn’t for leisure, Neville was doing everything to treat it like it was. No matter how busy he was with planning the current mission or even seeing what else Italy had to offer money wise, he made sure to make time for (Y/n). Everyday had been a dream come true, from softer moments down to more...intimate moments.

He hadn’t taken her all the way yet nor had he asked her to return the favor but he didn’t need her to. Spending hours upon hours between her legs was more than enough for him. The small whimpers and whiny moans that would erupt from her plagued his thoughts during all times of the day. Most of the time he’d step away to take care of himself when he did but other times when that option wasn’t available he’d pray to Merlin that his obvious hard on would just disappear. It was 50/50 with whether that’d actually work and when it didn’t? The guys would never let him forget.

Today was different though. Instead of having to split his time between preparing for the big day or spending time with his beloved he got to do both. Today was the day before they’d put their plan in action, making it the safest day to bring her to the museum considering there was no risk. Because the museum received many visitors on the daily, no one ever questioned their consistent visit. Plus, their attire often made them look like the kind of people who admired art, which wasn’t an incorrect assumption. They did appreciate art, just even more so when it was in their home or being sold to some rich idiot.

(Y/n) looked around in awe at everything around her. Everything about the museum screamed class and money. There wasn’t just art on the walls, but the ceilings had been hand painted as well. However, her eyes fixated on the glass display in the center of the room. Inside was an array of jewels of all sorts, in crowns, in rings, in earrings, but also in the most beautiful necklace she had ever seen. It had the biggest diamonds she had ever seen, connected by a white gold chain. Reading the sign she saw it belonged to a queen of a country that no longer existed and it had clearly been kept in immaculate condition over the years. A matching set of earrings set on the other side of it.

“See something you like, petal?” she jumped at the sound of the voice, turning her head slightly to smile at the man. Neville smiled back, wrapping his arms around her waist as he came behind her. His eyes lingered on the way her reflection made it seem like she was wearing the necklace. He couldn’t help but think of how beautiful she would look in it.

“No, just looking.” she responded, turning around to wrap her arms around the man’s neck. However, she couldn’t help but feel as though someone was staring at her. Looking out the corner of her eye, she saw a womanly figure facing her direction. She went to look but her attention was turned to the warm cheek on her hand. Neville leaned down, pressing his lips to hers not even trying to fight the smile growing on his lips. She kissed him back, standing on the tip of her shoes before pulling him down to her height as she giggled. He went to say something but muffled voices started to come from his ear piece.

“Sorry, it appears our time has been cut short for now. But don’t worry angel, I’ll be back as soon as I can be.” he said, placing a kiss on her lips before pulling her into a hug. Over his shoulder, (Y/n) watched as the woman from before quickly turned back to the painting in front of her, as if she wasn’t just staring at her. Perhaps it had been her imagination? Giving him one last smile she waved as the tall man began to walk away. 

Curiosity began to get the best of her, leading her to walk across the room to the woman. Looking at the painting she saw that it was indeed a beautiful painting! It showcased many people inside some sort of marble lookout point, gazing upon the sea. A gasp left her lips at the attention to detail, the wet appearance of the water, the reflection of the sun. Despite it not moving like the ones she was used to, she found that it didn’t need to be. The woman standing next to her gave her a side glance, a look on her face that she didn’t notice.

“Ti piace il dipinto?(“Do you like the painting?”)” the woman asked her, a mischievous look on her face. Gisele knew that the girl was sheltered just from her appearance. She wasn’t nearly as traveled as herself so there was no way for her to know even an inkling of what she had just asked her.

(Y/n) blinked at her, pondering what the woman had asked her before nodding. “È bellissimo. L'attenzione ai dettagli è incredibile! Non ho mai visto niente del genere.(“It's beautiful. The attention to detail is incredible! I've never seen anything like it!”)” she looked at the woman as she choked slightly, a concerned look on her face.

“You speak italian?” she asked in an offended tone, an unreadable look on her face. (Y/n) shrugged some, continuing to look at the painting.

“Not quite. I’ve only been learning for a few days. My boy- er, friend taught me but he says I’m a quick learner! I’m sorry if my translation was a bit off.” she said, offering the woman a kind smile. The woman’s eye twitched at the information, growling slightly. But, she remembered she had some “information” of her own.

“You mean Neville?” the strange woman asked, causing her to look up. She nodded slowly, offering her another kind smile.

“Do you know him?” she asked.

“Know him? Ha!” she sighed dramatically, putting a freshly manicured hand over her ample chest. “We were practically married! He and I were seeing each other for such a long time. I’m assuming you’re dating then?” she smirked to herself, watching as the girl shook her head no. “No? Well I guess that isn’t too shocking. I mean, why date a knock off when the real thing is still available. Oh! Where are my manners? I’m Gisele Bardot, Europe’s one and only top model.” (Y/n) felt her throat grow tight as she swallowed harshly. Neville had never once brought up Gisele to her. In fact, he had even gone as far as to say he hadn’t dated anyone, saving his heart for her. 

“Knock off? What do you mean?” she asked her innocently, blinking back the tears that were threatening to form. Perhaps it was a simple misunderstanding. However, Gisele’s cackle of a laugh told her otherwise.

“Oh honey, are you really that naive? Look at you, you’re a lesser version of myself. Do you really think that’s a coincidence?” she stated as if it was a face. She took the time to look at Gisele and realized she was right. Gisele had all the same features of her, but better. Higher cheekbones, fuller lips, her hair was healthier. And when it came to her body? (Y/n) could only dream of a chest as nice as hers with a stomach so flat, so toned. Was it a coincidence or was Neville really using her as a replacement for what he couldn’t have. “Poor thing, anyone with eyes could see-”

“Could see what?” Twyla seethed, placing an arm around her shoulder as she walked up to the two. (Y/n) felt relieved from the familiar face, wiping the tears that had fallen from her eyes, much to her efforts of trying to get them to not do so. “What business do you have with my friend?”

“We were just chatting! Right..” her eyes widened at the fact she didn’t know the girl’s name. Twyla smirked, giving her an expectant look.

“Go on, what’s her name?” Twyla asked in a fake concerned tone. As the model stood there gaping, mouth opening and closing like a fish, the blonde scoffed, grabbing (Y/n) as she dragged her off.

“Come on (Y/n), we don’t associate with trash. Especially not trash wearing grandma’s pearls and perfume.” she turned around once more, looking her up and down. “It’s a good thing you’re a model because you sure don’t know how to dress.” and with that they were off, walking out to the garden of the museum. When they got there, the taller girl looked at the (e/c) eyed girl, a concerned look present on her face. “What was that? I don’t like her, she gives me bad vibes. Not like, sinister, just...petty. I’ve seen her in those magazines and stuff. What’s her name? Gizette?”

“Gisele. Apparently she was Neville’s....Neville’s ex girlfriend.” tears began to fall from her eyes as she sobbed softly, falling forward into her friend’s chest. Without hesitation, the blonde wrapped her arms around her, hugging her close. “She essentially said that I’m just a replacement for the real thing which is her and, it must be true! I mean just look at her, she’s gorgeous Twyla! Runway gorgeous. She’s an international model and I’m..I’m just me.”

“Oh honey, I hate to ruin this heart to heart, actually this is an awful heart to heart, but she’s definitely lying! I’ve seen the way Neville looks at you and so has everyone else. I’ve got this feeling that he’s lying and you know me with my feelings, they’re always right.” (Y/n) looked up at her, sniffling some as Twyla wiped at her runny makeup with her tissue. “Plus, that easily could be the other way around. How do you know she wasn’t just a replacement for you?” she froze at her words. She was right, it very well could be the other way around. How would she know unless she asked? As if she read her mind, the next words aligned with her thoughts perfectly. “You know, there’s only one thing to do.”

“Ask him about it?” she gulped at the thought. Neville had been nothing but kind to her since they reconnected. She had nothing to be scared about. Whether it was learning the truth or Neville himself she feared she didn’t know. Or, at least she didn’t wanna admit which one it was.

“Oh..I was gonna say find this bitch and replace her shampoo with nair. You know, maybe even give her some of that tea my aunt gave to her husband.” Twyla shrugged, leaning back some with a sigh. “Buut, that’s good too.”

(Y/n) gave the girl a questionable look. “Twy….didn’t your aunt use that tea to kill her husband?” the girl nodded, sitting up as she dusted herself off.

“Yeah. Your point?” Before she could respond, Neville came running up to the two of them with a smile. As he placed a peck on her lips, she gave him a weak smile.

“Hi, love. I missed you.” he said, a dopey lovesick smile on his face. He cleared his throat, ears tinted cheeks. “I-I was wonderin’ if uh, you’d like to go on a date with me tomorrow. You know, after the mission.” her eyes widened as she felt her face grow fuzzy. A date? She was sure he had something worse to say, especially after the fiasco from earlier. ‘Gisele must’ve not been able to find him.’

“I’d love to! I’ve never been on a date before.” she answered honestly, giving him a smile. “I can’t wait.” he looked surprised as she accepted, picking her up as he spun her around before setting her back down gently. Placing a peck on her lips, he stroked her cheek.

“Fantastic. Oh I can’t wait. I’m going to spoil you on our date tomorrow,” he leaned near her ear, resting his hands on her rear, “And tonight too. How’s bout you sit on my face again, yeah?” she nodded shyly, looking down at their shoes. Neville chuckled some, walking away before another pair of men’s dress shoes stopped in front of her. Looking up she saw Seamus who gave her a small smile.

“Don’t worry mini boss, I kept that stupid woman away from him.” her eyes widened as she went to speak. “How’d I know? I could tell something was up and plus I saw her enter as we were leaving. Thought she’d try something. Whatever she said wasn’t true.” He patted her back (a bit too roughly..) as he offered her a thumbs up. “But, I know you’d still probably rather hear that from him.”

“You know Finnigan, for someone who acts so stupid you’re kinda smart sometimes.” Twyla said, giggling as she intertwined her hands with Draco. Draco offered her a nod to which she returned before beginning to walk off with the rest of them. She smiled when she saw Neville waiting for her by the door, hand outstretched with the same look he’d always give her. As they got in the car, she watched as the beautiful buildings passed them in the distance. It was then she decided.

She’d ask him, no matter how scared she was of the answer. Neville was sure to give her an honest one, but was it the one she wanted to hear?

PREVIOUS||NEXT

TAGSLIST: @vayeya11 @pink-hufflepuff @clancyscookies @elemental-of-magic @beewitchedlou @simpforremuslupin @mottergirl99 @princesslaiahg @nevillelongbottomsgirlfriend @redpanda-poetry @vibingaesthetically

[rexlapi]

i know no one who follows me is into genshin bUT im so proud of this au so i’ll post it anyways

moongod!zhonglixmotal!childe, chang’e/hou’yi au (no previous knowledge of the mid autumn festival is needed, hopefully i explained it well enough in the fic)

am i yours?

rating: teen for inexplicit self harm  wc: 2k

ao3

- -

It had only been a century since the god of the moon, known to the people as Morax, had first come to the barren rock he would soon have to call home. He had no emotional attachment to the place, however he had no other place to call home. Too many years since the man who had once been Zhongli had last seen his love, too long since he had known happiness. 

The earth was rising into view from his palace on the moon, the blue waters always reminding him of his lover’s bright eyes. Zhongli stood on the cold stone floor, staring out into the distance. It was the anniversary of the day when Zhongli had first ascended to yue, a day many mortals celebrated, offering him yuebing, or mooncakes, in hopes that he would bless their families. Every year, he found it in himself to smile upon those who still remembered his story, hoping that one day, his good would come back to him in the form of the one he loved. But of course, the world was a cruel place, leaving the immortal nothing but a barren rock to live his sad eternity on. 

Despite the people’s celebratory gifts, this day was always one of sorrow for Morax. He had only experienced a few decades of imprisonment on this rock, yet somehow Zhongli felt so, so very old. This day only ever reminded him of what he’s lost, of what he will never have again. To be fair, almost everything reminded him of his Tartaglia, from the waters of earth to the orange of the sun. More than anything, these things reminded him of his biggest mistake.

There was nothing in this that the moon god regretted more than his reckless action that got him stuck on this barren rock, never to see the face of the one he loved again. 

The day that ruined Zhongli’s life had been a beautiful day, one of the most beautiful days he had ever seen. The skies were a vibrant blue, streaks of puffy white clouds dotted throughout the sea of blue, the sunlight warm and bright. He had planned on proposing to Tartaglia that day He had everything prepared, an elaborate basket of luxurious gifts for the other man’s family, as well as a lovingly self-crafted pair of matching dangly earrings, for each of them. Zhongli unconsciously brushed his hand over his ear, toying with the rare orange jade bead at the end of his. 

He had been waiting for Tartaglia to return home from an assignment when one of his own students had broken into his house, looking for the small potion of immortality Tartaglia had received for shooting the excess suns out of the sky. His Tartaglia had always been an adept warrior, being proficient in nearly every weapon. Zhongli smiled to himself, wishing he could see the way Tartaglia bounced on his toes before every right, his face stretched into a broad grin, ready for the rush of adrenaline that every fight gave him. 

Zhongli had always loved teaching, wanting to impart his knowledge and wisdom on the next generation of bright minds. He would never forget the look of horror his student wore when Zhongli angrily shoved a spear through their stomach, snatching the elixir out of weakening hands and downing it in one gulp. It wasn’t until Tartaglia returned home shortly after the incident when Zhongli realized what he had done. He remembered how Tartaglia’s eyes had widened, his voice calling out for him, but Zhongli could already feel himself floating away, becoming weightless, as if he had become a spirit. The distraught cries from his love that morphed into sobs, calling his name, begging him to stay, telling him he loved him These cries would forever ingrain themselves into his memory. The elixir would have let them be happy and together forever. Instead, it separated the two of them for the rest of time.

Every year on this day, he would talk into the sky, hoping that maybe, one day, Tartaglia would hear him. Hoping that maybe one day he could see him smile, hear him laugh again. This year was no different. Zhongli busied himself in the kitchen, preparing some of Tartaglia’s favorite foods. He would eat a bite of each dish before leaving the rest as offerings to whatever greater powers lay above him, asking them for mercy, for freedom for this barren rock. Though, behind all of these, he would always ask to see his love, one last time. 

Please, Celestia. This is all I can offer for you. Please, I’d like a way off this rock, freedom from my past mistakes. He looked off into the distance, at the painting he had done of Tartaglia. Please, I’d like to see Tartaglia again. Please.

Years like this one passed. Years became decades, and decades became centuries. Time passed quickly for the immortal, and though it may pass fast, it had no end. Every year, Morax asked the same things of Celestia. Every year, he received no response. He had grown so very tired. 

On his 8880th mid-autumn festival, he awoke to see a sharp periwinkle dagger wrapped in silver silks sitting on the edge of his bed. He carefully unwrapped the fabric to reveal a beautifully carved glaze lily embedded on the handle. A small piece of paper fell out of the wraps, peaking Zhongli’s interest. He carefully set the dagger down onto his bed, picking up the small slip. 

A note, written in elegant, looping, traditional Liyuen. It read: Morax, your prayers have been heard. Celestia sends its regards as well as apologies for taking so long to process your request. Take this dagger as the key to the next journey in your life, where the one you love is waiting. It has been enchanted so there will be no pain. However, if you decide to take this chance, do know that it is irreversible. Do as you wish with it, take the chance or do not. 

I hope you find your peace, Zhongli.

The note was not signed, but somehow Zhongli felt as though he knew the person who had written the note. “Thank you.” he croaked out, his voice rough from lack of use. His hands shaking, he picked up the dagger once more. It was the perfect weight, a perfect balance of light yet solid. It had been, well, ever since he had come onto this rock since he had held a weapon. Not a weapon, a key. A chance. Hope. 

He took a walk around the empty palace where he had lived in solitude for thousands of years, as if saying goodbye. It was a goodbye he was happy to say. He retrieved the hand carved wooden box containing his most prized possession from it’s secret location, securing it in his pocket. He carefully rolled up the scroll containing the image of a smiling Tartaglia and slipping that into another pocket, scared that if he did see Tartaglia again, that Zhongli wouldn’t be able to recognize him. 

He stared down at the dagger in his hands, his fingers curling around the elegant glaze lily. He felt his grip grow tighter, then he felt his hands start to shake. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes. He was ready to leave this barren place behind. I will see you again, Tartaglia.

As promised, the blade brought him no pain. 

... 

Zhongli opened his eyes to see an ethereal forest, the trees not quite opaque, as if they weren’t quite there. He looked down to see the beautiful blade that had been gifted to him stained with golden blood. He wasn’t bothered by the golden blood, for it was the blood of immortals after all. He was however, awed by the trees he saw. He hadn’t seen vegetation in what felt like years, not having to eat food in order to sustain himself after ascending to godhood, saving human food for very special occasions. 

He looked around, though he didn’t see anyone. Where the one you love is waiting, the note had said. Zhongli wandered around the forest for what felt like days, looking for a head of bright orange hair or a pair of deep ocean eyes. He saw neither. Had the sender lied? He couldn’t help but lose a little bit of hope, though wherever he was now was still certainly better than the hellhole of a rock he had resided on for millennia. He took a deep breath of the fresh air, feeling more and more energetic by the moment. 

Say something. His brain told him. He was running out of options, so he did as his inner monologue asked. Clearing his throat, he recalled the song he would sing to his Tartaglia. Humming the first few lines to get warmed up, his hope growing with every beat. 

“Xu ni sheng shi shi, wu jue qu de ai,” His voice shook as he switched from his native Liyuen to lover’s Snezhnayan. “Always and forever, in this heart of mine…” The forest was silent. Zhongli felt his heart shatter, not wanting to accept that he really would never see his Tartaglia again. He knelt on the ground, his hand clutching the blade of the dagger, a cascade of golden blood dripping onto his spotless black-gold hanfu. He wished he could feel the sharp pain of the cold blade biting into his skin. 

“Xu ni sheng sheng shi shi, wu jue qu de ai,” 

Zhongli had never stood faster in his entire life, the dagger falling to the ground, forgotten. His eyes widened as the familiar face of his beloved appeared from behind a tree. He stood stunned. The sender didn’t lie.

The sun seemed to illuminate the younger boy, his orange hair glowing golden, his typical gray ensemble billowing in the breeze. Zhongli had never seen such a beautiful sight in his thousands of years of existence. “Always and forever, in this heart of mine… longer than the heavens, and the stars that shine…”

Zhongli and Tartaglia both rushed forward at the same time, the orange haired boy taking the other’s bleeding hand in his, while Zhongli gently placed his uninjured hand on his lover’s face. “Xiang si qing nan nai, yuan yu ni tong zai,”

They both broke out into smiles filled with grief and disbelief, their voices shaking as they finished the verse together. “I am yours, I am yours, forever”

Collapsing into the other man, Zhongli let himself cry. “Tartaglia I-”

He felt strong arms hug him tighter, only making Zhongli sob harder. “Shh it’s okay, I’m here now. You’re here now.” Tartaglia had begun to cry too, having fallen to the ground with Zhongli, the two a tangle of limbs and tears. 

“I love you so much.” Zhongli choked out, letting more and more of his years and years of pain and loneliness fade away with every moment in the other boy’s arms. 

Tartaglia kissed Zhongli through teary eyes, trying to convey the words he couldn’t say in the action. “I’ve never stopped loving you, even after all these years. I love you, Zhongli. So much. Please, don’t be an idiot again and cause us another eight-thousand years of separation. I don’t think I can go through that again.”

Zhongli laughed through a sob, placing a kiss on Tartaglia’s cheek. “I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” He pulled out the box he had carried around with him since he had been banished to the moon. Carefully, he pulled out the other earring he had crafted all those years ago, the same shape and pattern as the singular one Zhongli himself wore. “Tartaglia, would you be mine forever?”

“Only if you’re mine forever" He responded, the biggest shit-eatting grin on his face. 

Zhongli nodded solemnly, completely serious in his consideration of the agreement. “That is a fair contract.”

Tartaglia laughed before kissing Zhongli again. “It was a joke, of course I’ll be yours.”

He dipped his head down, allowing Zhongli to attach the earring to his ear. Perfect. Zhongli couldn’t help but think. The blue jade matched his eyes perfectly, just as Zhongli’s earring matched his own amber eyes. “Forever?”

“Forever."

~~~~~~~~~~

Xu ni sheng shi shi, wu jue qu de ai -> Let your love live forever,

Xiang si qing nan nai, yuan yu ni tong zai -> Love-sickness is unbearable, I wish I were with you

[greekgeek21]

Percy Jackson & The Avengers: Convergence - some badass demigod training!!

Hello, and welcome back to...my horrible explanation for being absent! Coming up on this episode, you'll see me explain that I had my first 2 lacrosse games of the season and was left with bruised ribs. If anyone ever says that women's lax isn't a real sport cuz there isn't contact, you can tell them that someone from a fanfic website said they had bruised ribs from playing.

Anyway, I hope you like this chapter. We're starting to get some actual plot movement I think so have fun with that. Honestly, I kinda forgot what happened in here so...yeah. Please comment, like, follow, and reblog! Stay safe & happy reading!

- your author

Ω ♆ Ω

Percy and Annabeth woke up to the sound of a startled shout. Frank's startled shout, to be specific. They both shot up right away, their battle instincts kicking in, but Frank had seen enough.

"Seriously guys!? Again?" he exclaimed.

"Nothing happened!" Annabeth reassured, "We just fell asleep!"

"We did kiss a little," Percy muttered, and Annabeth shot him a death glare.

"Not. Helping," she whispered scathingly.

A sense of complete déjà vu washed over Percy. Except this time, the rest of the Seven were standing in the doorway, watching on with various amused expressions on their faces.

"Oh, this is perfect. Coach Hedge is gonna love this," Leo smiled in maniacal glee.

"No, Leo," Piper ordered, "You're not going to do that. Instead, we are going to get this meeting over with so I can get some sleep."

"Aw...you ruin all my fun!" he exclaimed.

"Someone's gotta do it when Calypso isn't here," Piper said.

It was true. Calypso and Piper are probably the only ones who could actually control Leo. Calypso because of Leo's fear of losing her or just general fear of her, and Piper because of her charmspeak.

"Ok! That's enough. We're getting sidetracked. We need to start this meeting." Jason clapped his hands to get everyone's attention.

He gave Percy a meaningful look; one which said to 'take it from here.' So Percy did.

"Um, well, Annabeth and I wanted to talk to you guys about what's been going on. We need to come to an agreement on what we are allowed to say and do with the Avengers. I don't think we should show them the full extent of our powers because it seemed like those spies were looking for a reason to lock us up," he started, "And I'm not particularly fond of being put in a cell. How about you?"

"Yeah. And we need to figure out a way to deal with the bombings without them figuring us out. The mortals seemed pretty Hades-bent on releasing the big secret, and that never bodes well for people like us. I know that we need their help, but I don't trust them." Annabeth said.

"We can just say we were born with the powers, and have no idea why. I mean, it's technically true," Jason offered.

The others all nodded in agreement.

"Ok, now what about the pattern? What is it?" Piper asked.

"All of the places are big parts of the Greek and Roman world. Brooklyn Bridge is near Manhattan, the home of the Gods, Portland: Mt. St. Helens, where Typon used to be held, LA: entrance to Hades, Long Island: Camp Half-blood, and San Francisco: Camp Jupiter," Annabeth answered.

"Woah," Jason whispered, shocked.

"Yeah, but that's not our biggest concern. We also need to figure out how to hide our identities from the world while we're fighting with the Avengers," Annabeth said.

Everyone else there hadn't even thought of that. It comes in real handy to have a daughter of Athena around sometimes. Ok, not sometimes, all the time. All of them would be really dead without her quick thinking and planning.

"Um, I could try to see if the Aphrodite cabin could cook something up?" Piper suggested, "But most of them are still getting used to fighting, so they won't really know what to make. They need help with the designs."

Leo shot up from where he had slumped down into the desk chair, "I can help! Well, the Hephaestus cabin can. We can help design it so it's battle-ready."

"Good. We'll need those soon, I think. I have a feeling that we're going to have a lead soon, so we need to be ready when it comes. This is just one quest, so there is no need for people to think we're some kind of superheroes," Annabeth said.

"Aw! But I already had a name picked out!" Leo exclaimed.

He looked like he was about to let them in on his superhero name, but Annabeth held up a hand with a glare that clearly said to not speak unless he wanted to lose some very important parts of him. That kept him quiet, for sure.

"Is that all?" Frank asked, towering over them all.

"For now, yes. Remember, say the absolute minimum and stick to twisting the truth. If you reveal any new information without the others knowing, call a meeting to let us know," Annabeth confirmed, nodding her head.

"Great, now I can go back to sleep," Percy said, pulling Annabeth back down with him.

The others filed out soon after that, already hearing Percy's soft snores as they left and returned to their respective rooms. Ok, so Jason and Piper stayed in the same room like Percy and Annabeth did, but nothing happened. It was just nice to be in the arms of someone who cares about you, you know?

Ω ♆ Ω

"Up and at 'em, kiddos! It's training day!" Tony gleefully exclaimed over the speakers that Percy was absolutely sure he did not see in his room.

Percy groaned when he saw what time it was: 6:00 AM. He knew he wasn't allowed to (and that it was wrong, of course), but he wanted to kill Tony so badly in that moment. It would be quick! Nobody would suffer!

But, alas, he had to actually work with the man-child. It might not come off like it, but Percy takes war very seriously, and this was starting to feel like a war. Or at least, it would become one if they didn't stop it soon. And to do that, they needed the Avengers, apparently.

That was the only reason that he followed Annabeth in getting up and ready for the day. He took a little longer than Annabeth, but at 6:30 AM, they were stepping out of his room. They saw that the others were slowly doing the same. They were all tired. There weren't any big dream incidents, but that doesn't mean that staying up until midnight and then waking up at six in the morning won't do something to you. Even Leo looked exhausted, with big puffy eyes from rubbing them in an attempt to wake himself up quicker. If Leo Valdez was tired, then you knew that it was too early for this.

Also, you have to remember that they'reteenagers. Teenagers aren't meant to be up super early- it's a scientific fact, Percy thinks. Annabeth once told him something about their melatonin not releasing until later at night, so they could stay up and sleep in later.

What? Percy pays attention to what she's saying sometimes.

"I hate Tony," Piper grumbled, practically falling asleep on Jason.

"You and us all, chica," Leo mumbled before letting out a huge yawn.

"What did he say was going on? Training?" Jason asked, looking over at Annabeth for answers because she seemed the most awake of the group.

"Yep. Training, whatever that entails. I don't know, so be prepared for anything. I really hope it has nothing to do with electronics, but knowing our luck, and how Tony has been so far, it will, so just try not to get too close," she answered.

Leo tiredly saluted her, "Yes, ma'm."

Hazel rolled her eyes, "Come on, Repair Boy."

She grabbed his arm and started leading the way towards the living room, which was their best guess at where the Avengers were.

As they were walking, they were interrupted by the disembodied voice of JARVIS, "Excuse me, but I was told to direct you to the training room, where the Avengers are currently assembled and waiting for you. Shall I proceed?"

All of the demigods were still really weirded-out by the AI, and there was no way it was ending soon. It's just a reminder that they were currently in a building basically composed entirely of technology, one of their greatest liabilities. Liabilities were a dangerous thing in their lives.

"Yes..." Percy answered hesitantly, unsure where to look.

"Then please follow the arrows projected on the ground, sir," JARVIS said.

Sure enough, there were large white arrows pointing them away from the living room, so they followed them. It was about a two minute walk to the elevators, where they were told to go to the 60th floor, which was apparently one whole training room by itself.

Ω ♆ Ω

"So let me get this straight, you guys want us to...play a video game?" Frank asked, gesturing to the giant room around them.

The Seven were quickly ushered by the Avengers into a big room with a bunch of white, padded tiles all around them as soon as they had reached the training floor. There was only a viewing window and an exit that disappeared when the door was closed. Then, Tony explained what they were going to be doing. None of them really understood it yet.

"No! I want you to fight the LMDs! The robots! They will simulate different levels of skill to evaluate your skills. Understand?" Tony punctuated each word, quickly losing any sense of patience he had started with.

"Yeah. We got it," Annabeth sighed.

Ok, she was sure she was the only one of them who realized that they were about to break one of the rules they established last night on the first day. They were about to fight robots. TECHNOLOGY.

This should go well, Annabeth thought.

Steve interrupted before Tony could make a snarky comment, "Good. We'll start with fighting separately and then together as a group. Afterwards, we'll see how you work with different weapons."

"Aye aye, Cap," Leo joked.

"Leo, focus. We're about to fight ROBOTS." Annabeth tried to get the son of Hephaestus to understand the severity of the situation. "You have a back-up plan, right?"

He could talk to machines. Robots were machines. Therefore, he should be able to get them out of this mess if anything went wrong.

He gave her a nod of understanding, and Annabeth settled back into her natural stance rather than her tense one. Well, she's always tensed for battle. At least in her natural one it's less obvious.

"Alright, who wants to go first?" Tony asked over the intercom.

"Uncle Leo will go first, right?" Percy joked, referencing to one of Leo's favorite nicknames for himself.

"Sure! I just need to know how much damage I'm allowed to do," Leo said, looking up at the Avengers.

Annabeth was shocked that he had even thought to ask that, and apparently the Avengers were, too.

"Um, just let go. There's nothing you can do to break this room. I designed it myself," Tony answered, still arrogant even through his confusion.

"Come on out, the rest of you," Natasha instructed.

Once the rest of the demigods had exited the room and stood next to the Avengers at the viewing window, Tony pressed a button on a screen that made a compartment in the walls of the room open up, revealing a row of floating LMDs.

"Now, I'm going to start you at Level 2, okay? It gets harder as you move up. The LMDs should stay the same form throughout every level, though. Ready?" Tony said.

Leo pulled his war hammer from his magical toolbelt and lit it and his arms on fire, "Ready."

Tony had to shake himself out of his shock before he pressed the start button, but when he did, every one of the mortal heroes had sat on the edge of their metaphorical seats, eager to see just how powerful these kids could be.

Plus, the kid had just pulled a giant war hammer from his normally-sized toolbelt, and then proceeded to light himself and the hammer on fire. They were bound to be curious after that display.

They knew the very basics of the young heroes' abilities, but most of that stuff was based on just what they had been told. Actual, visible proof is what they wanted.

All at once, the LMDs transformed into the Avengers minus the Hulk. Repeat, they changed into the Avengers. Leo had to fight a copy of the Avengers, alone.

Percy was freaking out inside. Sure, he trusted his friend, but Leo was a joker, and he tended to not understand how serious things were. In this case, he hoped that didn't happen.

"This should be interesting," Natasha remarked.

"No, this should be terrible. Tony, you never told me you were using this setting," Bruce said, rushing up to the other scientist, "He's just a kid."

"I think they've made it clear they aren't just kids, Jolly Green. It's fine. If they wanted to be treated like the rest of us, then they need to pass this test," Tony said.

Bruce looked like he wanted to say a lot more, but Jason stepped up to stop him, "He'll be fine, Dr. Banner. Leo may not look it, but he's powerful and he's smart. He can handle this."

Jason looked so sure of himself that it was enough to convince the doctor that it would be okay.

In truth, Jason had no idea how this program worked. There was a good chance that Leo did not, in fact, have this handled.

While this was being discussed, Leo had already started to fight the Iron Man LMD. He was currently alternating between swinging his hammer at it and firing balls of fire. The LMD had only been hit a couple of times because it kept maneuvering around the attacks by flying away.

It was getting tiresome, and Leo wanted it to be over with. So, he dropped his hammer and set a determined look on his face, glaring up at the robot.

The Seven were grinning, already figuring out what was happening, while the Avengers were just plain confused. What was the kid gonna do? Glare them to death?

Then, Leo started grinning and they knew it was all over.

He crouched down onto the ground and placed a hand on the floor, closing his eyes in concentration. The LMDs seemed to be as confused as their originals.

Three seconds passed before Leo's grin grew even more, and then he spoke a single word, "Stop."

And they did. Every single LMD lost their form and fell to the ground, limp and unmoving. Leo stood up, dusted his pants off, and turned to the viewing window to see his teammate's reactions.

They were priceless.

"That's how you do it," he said, "Am I done?"

Tony literally shook himself out of his stupor, "Yeah, sure. I need to reboot the LMDs."

When Leo came through the door, the rest of the demigods crowded him, patting him on the back and laughing at his dramatics.

"What was that?" Natasha demanded, breaking through the teens to tower over Leo's elf-like form.

Okay, maybe tower isn't the right word. She was taller than him, but not by much. Natasha was just very intimidating.

"Uh...fighting?" Leo tried.

Natasha's glare hardened, "You know that's not what I mean. What did you do to make the LMDs stop attacking?"

Leo glanced at Annabeth, who nodded in consent, "I talked to them."

"You did what?!" Tony exclaimed.

"I talked to them. They were pretty boring, to be honest, but I was able to shut them down," he answered.

Tony let out an incredulous laugh, "That's not possible! You can't just TALK to machines!"

"He can, and he did," Piper said, smiling proudly at her best friend.

"But–" Tony's voice died out.

"How come you never told us of this ability?" Natasha asked.

"You never asked," Percy answered simply, not liking her interrogatory tone at all.

The spy looked like she wanted to continue the conversation, but Clint whispered something in her ear and she stepped back with one last glare.

"Welp! That was fun! Who's next?" Tony clapped his hands.

Everyone turned to see that he had gotten the LMDs back online and back in the Avengers' form.

Piper sighed and started to walk to the door, "I guess I'll go next."

Before she could enter, Steve asked, "What weapon are you going to use? Your powers won't work on the robots."

Piper smirked at him over her shoulder before pulling Katoptris from its sheath on her thigh. Apparently, the Avengers had yet to fully break through the Mist, and they could not see her having that strapped there this entire time. But when she pulled it out, they seemed to finally be able to see it for what it truly was. It makes you wonder what they thought was there before. A ruler, maybe?

"I've got this," she stated before slipping into the training room.

Ω ♆ Ω

It was obvious Piper had been taking more lessons on dagger-fighting with Annabeth. As soon as the first person attacked, she was slashing and stabbing like crazy. Her lithe form was swisting out of the way of punches from Steve's copy, while Clint's arrows were shooting at her from behind.

Tony had clearly upped the level of difficulty after seeing what Leo could do.

Piper ducked under one of the arrows, and then shot back up to land a finishing blow to the center of LMD-Steve's chest. Then, she ripped Katoptris out of the robot and turned to throw it at Clint's copy, which just barely managed to avoid getting stabbed.

She was running on pure adrenaline now. It was best to imagine these opponents as monsters. Sure, when they actually fought humans, they would need to not kill, but these were just robots.

Cilnt's robot shot it's last arrow, and it exploded right before her face, stunning her into stillness. In that couple of seconds it took for her to recenter herself, Natasha's copy jumped onto her back for a chokehold. Piper struggled, but the LMD had been designed to know all of Natasha's known skills, and it was working. The Iron Man LMD landed and shot a stunning shot at her chest: the final straw for Piper to finally surrender.

She knew they wouldn't kill her, but she was not in the mood to be knocked-out. It left you with a massive headache.

So she tapped out.

"Ok ok, I'm done. I'm done," She panted as she was released, rubbing her neck.

Piper was not happy about having to surrender, but it seemed like the Avengers had been thoroughly impressed with her skill with such a small weapon.

"I'll do next," Annabeth declared, high-fiving Piper on her way out.

"Good luck," Piper said.

"Don't need it," Annabeth responded, pulling out her drakon-bone sword.

Out in the control room, Tony said, "Is that a bone?!"

"It's whatever you want it to be," Hazel grinned, manipulating the Mist just a bit.

"You scare me sometimes, Miss Metal Detector," Leo muttered, glancing at Annabeth's sword, which had shifted into a machete.

He wasn't sure whether to be impressed by Hazel's skill, or weirded-out by Tony's brain.

"Make sure to move to difficulty up a bit," Percy told Tony, "She'll be insulted otherwise."

The billionaire seemed to be getting used to the teens' weird ways because he didn't even flinch when he heard that, and instead moved to comply.

"And...here we go," Tony said over the intercom, "Good luck, Annie."

"My name is Annabeth!" she shouted before going into the fight.

In this level, every single one of them attacked at once. Annabeth back-bended under Steve's copy's punch, and then kicked up into LMD-Natasha's face. After, she turned and sliced the Iron Man armor on the side, just under the armpit. She had picked that as a point of weakness before she had even stepped into the building.

"She's good," Natasha relented, watching as the daughter of Athena thrusted her sword into Steve's robot foot.

Seeing that Clint's LMD copy was not going to get any closer to her, Annabeth pulled out a hidden dagger and threw it in a perfect line to hit it in the center of its forehead. Then, she turned and blocked a punch from Natasha's robot, who had recovered from the face-hit. The spy copy used the Iron Man LMD to jump up and wrap her legs around Annabeth's neck, trying to do a scissor hold, which failed because Annabeth rolled forward, slamming Natasha's head into the ground. The left a big enough dent that the LMD wasn't getting back up.

That only left Iron Man to deal with.

She settled into a fighting stance, but didn't attack, choosing to wait for her opponent to make the first blow.

Percy was grinning. This was what they needed: a good way to blow off steam without it possibly ending with one of them dead.

"What is she waiting for?" Steve asked.

"She's playing with it. It's fun for her," Jason answered, "It's Annabeth."

Finally, the robot got impatient and attacked. It sent a stun blast at her, which Annabeth quickly avoided. After, she ran up to the wall, kicked off of it, and jumped up to drag the Iron Man LMD down to the ground, where she sat down on it and landed a few punches. But she quickly realized punching wasn't doing much good.

"Judo flip! Do the judo flip!" Leo exclaimed, jumping up and down in excitement.

When it wasn't him being the one attacked by Annabeth, it was super entertaining.

Annabeth sighed, but a smile was pulling at the edges of her lips. She hauled Iron Man up, who was still recovering from being slammed down to the ground, and got a good hold on it's arm. Then, she flipped it over her shoulder with an ease that only came from years of experience.

With a huge smile on her lips, and a last glance at her carnage, Annabeth walked back out to the control room.

"How was that for a kid?" She asked Natasha.

"Not bad," she got for an answer.

Ω ♆ Ω

Jason, Hazel, and Frank's individual tests went-by pretty quickly. Jason electrocuted all of the robots, rendering them immobile.

After that, and with another new batch of LMDs, Hazel used her Spatha to slice and cut through the robots. In the end, it proved too hard for her to do it with just a sword, so she pulled a chunk of the wall out and smashed it against the LMDs until they were in many different pieces.

Frank ended up having to forfeit, but not before getting every single Avengers copy but Steve down. Steve ended up having him in a chokehold that was just too difficult to get out of. And Frank had already transformed into many animals, so he wasn't sure if he could've changed back if he had transformed again.

If it wasn't obvious, Percy was avoiding doing his turn. He was trying to stay in the corner, and out of the notice of any of the adults. However, that wasn't possible with two spies in the room. They notice everything.

"Percy? Your turn," Natasha said.

So much for that plan.

Percy hesitated, "Um...about that, I don't think I should go."

Natasha raised her eyebrows in mock-surprise, but it was actually Steve who spoke, "You have to go, son. In order to work well together, we need to know each other's strengths and weaknesses. This will never work without you doing this."

"Plus, we promise it's completely safe," Bruce added in.

Percy sighed, admitting that he wasn't going to be able to worm his way out of this one. Instead of fighting, he turned to whisper to Annabeth, "Don't let me get out of control."

Annabeth gave him a sad look, "Percy, I know you have control. I trust you. You just need to trust yourself. You would never hurt us. I know that for certain."

The Avengers were watching this interaction like hawks, but the other demigods were averting their attention. This happened sometimes, Percy and Annabeth going into their own world that only they could understand, and it was best to just let them be. Plus, privacy is a real thing people. The moment seemed almost too intimate for them to interrupt.

Percy still seemed to be having trouble believing Annabeth's statements, but he went into the training room without another protest. His shoulders were sagging in defeat, and he seemed to be folding in on himself. He was never one for attention, but that was a bit much in Leo's mind.

However, Leo and the rest of the Seven didn't have a full grasp on just how uncomfortable Percy as with using his powers now. They didn't know what happened in "that place."

"Are you ready, Percy?" Tony asked, readying the LMDs again.

"Yeah, I guess," Percy answered.

Annabeth was rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet, "Just breathe, Perce," she whispered under her breath, "You can do this."

She had to put on a brave face for her boyfriend, but she truly was terrified of Percy's potential. She had seen it first-hand in their trip underground, and it was nothing to be underestimated. The Avengers didn't know what powers they were playing with here. She only hoped that her insistent trust she was putting in Percy was going to amount to truth.

"We'll start you on Level 5? Based on what your friends can do, I think this will be a good start," Steve asked.

"Sure," Percy responded, bringing Riptide from his pocket.

"What's he going to do with a pen?" Bruce whispered to Clint.

The Seven all smiled at each other. Little did the mortals know, that pen was definitely not just a pen. It was always amusing when people saw what Riptide truly was for the first time.

"Alright. Here we go," Tony said, starting the simulation.

Percy closed his eyes, inhaled, exhaled, and popped the cap off of his pen. Opening his eyes, you could tell something had shifted in him. He was in his natural element now, and nobody could stop him from achieving his goal.

That goal just so happened to be mutilating some billionaire's robots.

"Let's have some fun," Percy said, charging the first LMD.

He was a flurry of motion. His fighting style was a mix from Greek, Roman, and modern martial arts that he had learned from Annabeth. He'd kick one adversary just to turn and thrust his sword into another one trying to attack him from behind.

"He's amazing," Bruce said in wonder, mesmerized by Percy's skill.

The son of Poseidon was relying only on his hand-to-hand and swordsmanship skills, rather than his powers, but that barely slowed him down. If the mortals wanted a display of his competence, then he would give them one.

Annabeth had a proud smile on her face as she watched Percy judo flip Natasha's robot over his shoulder and slammed it hard enough to the ground that it "died," ending his fight.

That had gone well, considering Percy's worries.

However, he knew better than to let his guard down just yet. As all demigods know, life never gives any breaks. That, and the Fates are cruel.

Ω ♆ Ω

"Ok, guys. Let's take a lunch break, and then we'll do some more training, but this time, with only abilities," Steve said.

Percy had put his sword away, and was not standing in the viewing room with the rest of the heroes, mortal and demigod alike. All of the teens looked and felt exhausted, so it was a given to take a break.

"Got it, boss," Leo saluted, turning and exiting the room, heading no doubt in the direction of the kitchen.

"I guess that means we're leaving," Percy laughed. A real, genuine laugh.

It made Annabeth smile larger than she had in a long time. Improvement is always good.

Soon, everyone was gathered around the kitchen and living room area. Percy and Leo were scavenging for food while the Avengers and the rest of the Seven talked. So far, the hunt was not going as planned.

"Tony! Are you seriously telling me you're a billionaire, and you can't afford some decent Cheerios?!" Percy yelled.

"Yeah! Who goes grocery shopping around here?" Leo exclaimed, holding up the near-empty jug of milk.

The Avengers all looked at each other in confusion, "Who DOES go grocery shopping?" Bruce asked.

"Pepper, sometimes, I think. She must've been busy this week," Tony answered, "We can just order some Chinese or something for now."

"That should work, but if you're going to house these boys," Annabeth pointed to Percy, Leo, Jason, and Frank, "You're going to need a lot more food around at all times. Their appetites could rival that of an elephant."

Hazel let out a tiny laugh, realizing Annabeth's little pun about Frank. She received a small smirk in response.

"Teenagers," Tony muttered, rolling his eyes, "Always hungry."

"Now wait a second, Tony, I remember seeing you eat an entire large pizza by yourself just a couple weeks ago," Natasha remarked, smirking at her teammate.

Tony only glared in response, and then he told JARVIS to order lunch.

"Well, while we're waiting, I'll explain what our next exercise is," Steve said, "Basically, we're going to see and document your powers, but in a more controlled environment. You won't be fighting anything, but this will be more focused on precision than quantity. We need to know your full capabilities so that we know where to put you in a fight. Is that okay?"

He was asking their permission as more of a courtesy than an actual question, obviously, but the demigods still nodded their heads in confirmation. It wasn't like they couldn't leave at any time if things ever got too out-of-control.

Or at least, that's what they told themselves. In all honesty, nobody trusted each other yet. They could be shot down by the Avengers if they tried to run away, for all they knew, and that's what the scariest thing was. Neither group really KNEW the other group's intentions, only what they had told each other.

Everyone was walking on thin ice, whether it was known to them or not.

Ω ♆ Ω

I hope you liked it! Remember, this is also on FF, Ao3, Inkitt, Webnovel, and Wattpad.

other chapters :)

[overwatchworks]

That Pretty Face:

Inspired by art done by a good pal, they always draw the Blackwatch boys for me and it keeps my sanity.

It had been weeks. Weeks and weeks and Jesse had not truly thought about him since they had picked him up in pieces back in Hanamura. He had been busy. Mind occupied with other things. Genji Shimada was not the only thing being built from the ground up again.

Red eyes, silver metal covering most of his face, white and black synth skin. The Blackwatch insignia on his chest, outlined in glowing crimson. He looked angry. He looked resigned. Jesse didn’t blame him.

"Your life in return for your services". Jesse had heard the story, knew the drill. He’d had the same talk.

Death or Blackwatch. They were basically the same thing.

It had been weeks. Weeks and weeks and Jesse had not truly thought about him since they had picked him up in pieces back in Hanamura. He had been busy. Mind occupied with other things. Genji Shimada was not the only thing being built from the ground up again.

Guard duty was taking up his time now. Protecting Dr. Liao while she worked tirelessly on the AI that would, as she said, save the world where she could not. Jesse had seen enough of the world to know it could not be saved, but he was not about to tell her that. This was her life’s work, and who was he to dissuade a little bit of good in a world so riddled with evil. A world where people murdered their brothers in cold blood, left them shattered, left them for dead.

Just a few perks of the job.

The only reason Genji Shimada was back on his radar was because he was standing with them for training. Red eyes, silver metal covering most of his face, white and black synth skin. The Blackwatch insignia on his chest, outlined in glowing crimson. He looked angry. He looked resigned. Jesse didn’t blame him.

Your life in return for your services. Jesse had heard the story, knew the drill. He’d had the same talk. Death or Blackwatch. They were basically the same thing.

He was a cyborg now, wires hanging off the back of his head and whirring with each movement. The only parts of him that were obviously human being his left arm and what little of his face was still showing. Even that was mutilated with scars and marred by tubing. But he was a sight to behold when training. Fast, unbelievably agile. Ruthless. Violent. Every movement calculated and striking to kill.

It was beautiful, in a terrible sense. Clearly, Genji was skilled, but clearly, he was also unhinged. Pushing his body to the breaking point, steam coming up from odd places and eyes gaining dark circles as he overworked the human parts past their limits.

The weeks passed like that, training and missions going the same way. Genji liked to rip things apart. Genji liked to rip himself apart. Coming back with sparking wires sticking out of his arm and chest, blood that was too dark and glistening dribbling from holes in his armour. Covered in it. Some of it was his. Most of it wasn’t.

Jesse was generally assigned to missions with him, and generally they went well. Genji was quiet, the comms hardly ever going off on his end besides to give a general warning or a check in. He knew Jesse’s name, though, which surprised him the first time he used it. They had been caught in a crossfire, Talon ambushing their escape route and bringing in a sniper. Jesse had heard her rifle winding up, saw the laser sight flash to his chest. A single spot of red.

“She’s on you, McCree!” Genji had called, voice sharp and accented. Concerned, even. And then, of course, he had been shot. The bullet was armour piercing, but he had managed to move out of the way enough for it to not hit anything vital. Something he could survive, something Dr. Deorain had healed fairly quickly on the ride back to base. Genji had watched her work on him for a while, gaze boring into Jesse every time he looked up at the ninja.

For the first time, he wondered what was under that mask. If anything even was under the mask.

His eyes were expressive. They were pretty, all long lashes and dark intensity. They could be soft, at times. It was rare, but it happened. Mostly when Genji thought no one was looking, when he thought no one would notice the human parts of him anymore. Jesse did. But he did not let on just yet. They were not quite close enough for that. He didn’t know if they ever could be. Not in this line of work, not with what they had to do and the promise of death at every corner, a mission always a hairsbreadth away from going in the wrong direction, a bullet always missing them by the skin of their teeth.

Jesse loved it.

Jesse hated it.

Genji did too, he had learned, was born and bred for it. Made for it when he was born a second time, unable to escape the fate of a warrior, an assassin. Jesse wondered if he was bothered by that. The fact that his life was nothing but war and blood and death. Had asked him about it when they were stuck in the med bay together, drugs in his system making his lips looser than they already were.

Surprisingly, Genji had answered.

No, I am not bothered by it. I grew up knowing it was my fate, my duty. But I do resent it, and what it has done to me. What I have lost and had stolen away from me.

Jesse had listened raptly, the sound of Genji’s voice soothing in a way. Robotic, accented. Soft. His eyes were soft in that moment too. Lost in memory, perhaps. Jesse did not look too far into it.

Genji had gone quiet again after that, shifting where he could with the wires attached to his neck linked up to a computer behind him, something pumping modified biotics into the tubes in his arms, on the ports of his stomach. Uncomfortable, but not because of everything he was hooked up to.

I don’t know if I quite understand your situation, but never bein’ a normal kid? I get that. Nothin’ was ever normal for us except a weapon in hand and aimin’ it at someone else. Bein’ told to shoot. I guess in the grand scheme of it all, makes us no better than the bad guys, huh?

Genji looked back at him, assessing for a long moment.

We are not bad, we are just doing what we have to in order to survive. Kill or be killed. Join us or die.

I wish it wasn’t like that.

Another long moment passed, Genji gripping the edge of the examination table, eyes downcast.

Me too.

It was a long time before they spoke like that again. Missions kept them busy, and then training when they were not scheduled for them, Jesse occasionally going to meetings with Reyes while Genji went to the med bay with Dr. Ziegler to continue his modifications. They would pass one another in the halls. Jesse gave a tip of his hat and then added a wink until Genji finally began to acknowledge him back with a slight nod or raise of his brows. He liked to imagine there was at least a bemused smile under that faceplate when his eyes scrunched just a bit. Maybe.

They sparred together, started to train together after Reyes saw how well they worked as a team. Genji was good at quick, agile attacks up close while Jesse took on the long distance and range targets. Genji protected Jesse, and Jesse protected Genji in return. They got closer. Near death calls tended to do that to folks.

Genji talked to him more. Jesse told him stories and would get a few in return on the rooftops where the air was crisp and the sky was clear. Genji tried on his hat. Genji laughed. Just a small, quiet chuckle, but it left Jesse staring for a little too long. Genji noticed, Jesse tried to pretend his red cheeks were attributed to the cold as he snatched his hat back and drew it low over his eyes. He did not see the way Genji’s had softened again.

The next morning had them sitting in an airship, waiting to be dropped into a volatile zone overrun by null sector forces. They started out okay, but slowly, everyone got tired. They were only human, they made mistakes, slipped up. Null sector did not.

Genji did not.

Jesse was shouting into the comms for evac after he had to watch their third agent get shot down by a bastion unit, gunfire and static the only thing he was hearing in return. Jammed signals, bad luck. He dragged the corpse of a friend behind a building and had to leave it there, or they would all be one by the end of the day.

“We gotta get to higher ground where these things can’t jam our comms!” he called, Genji turning to him and nodding once before taking off towards the highest building. Jesse did not need an explanation, not between them. He motioned to what was left of their drop team.

“Move outta this hot spot! Stay behind cover, don’t leave one another’s backs unguarded. Get down that alleyway and take the first left, it’ll take you behind that main square, got it? We can find a place to hide out there, there’s just too many of these damn things here when we don’t have a shield!”

Jesse ordered, wishing not for the first time that he had someone like Reinhardt with him. Or at least a fully outfitted team like Overwatch always sent in. That would have been nice.

As it was, they had to run, Jesse getting everyone accounted for that was left before following up on the rear, eyes peeled for any sight of Genji.

He turned, gun spinning in hand and resting at his side as he counted the omnics marching towards him. Fifteen. He could do it. Six shots went of in tandem, six perfect bullet holes steaming through the first line of omnics. Jesse reloaded and did it again. Finished off the last two and ran down the alleyway, catching up with the rest of his team, ignoring the throbbing starting up behind his eyes.

“Bought us a little time. Come on, keep movin’.”

“McCree, we need more medical personnel,” Martinez urged, setting an agent down against the wall.

“Where’d Frazier go?”

“Dead.”

“Dammit.”

“There’s too many wounded right now if we need to make a quick getaway. Did Shimada not make it...?”

“Nah, he’s callin’ in evac for us. Stay here and do your best to patch everyone up, can you do that for me?”

Martinez nodded shakily, pulling out her med kit and going to the worst of the wounded in the group. Jesse made to check on the others, then saw a flash of red above them in his periphery. Genji landed in front of him not a moment later, the sound heavy, blood dripping down his shoulder. He did not seem to notice.

“It was all static, but I was able to find what was jamming them,” he reported, pointing to a building further into the hot spot. “I can get in there and take it out.”

“You ain’t goin’ back in there alone, that’s not how we do things around here. I’ll go with you.”

“I don’t need you slowing me down,” Genji bit out.

“How about we not think about it like that and instead say, ‘wow, thanks McCree for havin’ my back for me in case I get in over my head like I always do’, yeah?”

“I can do this by myself, you will only get hurt following me!”

“And what happens if you get hurt alone and then we all get killed ‘cause you couldn’t stand havin’ to take help from someone?!”

“Hey, boys, how about instead of arguing about it, you both hurry up and get us out of here. McCree’s right about one thing; if we don’t get out of here soon, we’re all toast, alright? We have people dying!” Martinez interrupted, glaring at the two of them as Jesse sighed.

“Come on,” he grumbled, moving in the direction of the building Genji had pointed out. Genji fell in stride with him after a moment, eyes shifting to him. Crimson narrowed darkly.

“If you die, I won’t let you rest peacefully.”

Jesse snorted, gaining a devilish grin.

“Darlin’, I ain’t ever planned on anythin’ but another spot deep in Hell when I die. Peace wasn’t even on the radar.”

Genji did not offer him a reply, simply quickened his pace and took off, leaving Jesse to follow behind with a sharp eye. They slipped past the rows of null sector stationed in the plaza in front of the building quietly, Genji motioning to a window just outside of their surveillance. He climbed into it, leaning over the edge with a hand outstretched. Jesse took it. Hauled himself inside and took a moment to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Genji waited. Static was running through the comms this close to the jammer, giving Jesse a headache. It was a large structure, pulses of blue light that shimmered leaving it in intervals.

“Damn...How’re we gonna take that thing out?”

“A detonator,” Genji offered, Jesse frowning.

“You wanna lure one of them in here?”

“It’s the best option we have. I cannot get near that thing, it interferes with my cybernetics.”

“And you were plannin’ on doin’ this alone?”

Genji merely glared, then pointed again. “There are three posted just outside the entrance. It should not be hard getting them inside.”

“But this signal will jam them too, right?”

“Not if we move them manually.”

Jesse stared at the ninja, sitting back on his thighs and pushing his hat up as he faced him fully.

“Lemme get this straight. You wanna shove one of them in here, somehow push them close enough to the jammer so that when they explode, it takes it out, all the while not letting the massive amount of null sector troopers out front know that we’re here?”

“Well, actually, I was thinking we let null sector do it for us. They have more fire power than we do, and if we stay behind the detonator, they will shoot it. They are programmed to neutralize enemies, no matter what is in front of them. We can take advantage of that.”

Jesse blinked. Frowned and ran a hand over his beard, chewing on his lip.

“Is it bad that I think that might actually somehow work?”

“Only if we do it right.”

“Alright. Alright, yeah. Let’s go.”

It took some finagling. Genji’s steps were stuttering as if his limbs were not synching with the rest of him when he got too close to the jammer. It was just the two of them. Jesse was sweating. But they got the detonator inside the door, and it was hell unleashed as soon as they did. Genji knocked it in with a kick, Jesse shooting at the null sector omnics running in after him.

“Go! Get behind it now!” he shouted, Jesse ducking towards the jammer. Genji deflected, stumbled, found his feet again. It was close. A lot of cover fire from Jesse’s end needed just to get him behind a wall. He was shaking his head, blinking hard. They needed to get out of there.

Jesse was taking most of the attention from the null sector troops, staying just close enough to the detonator to ensure it was being pushed towards the jammer. And it was working. The detonator’s armour was falling, bright, fiery oranges and reds being revealed, the whole thing starting to shake. Jesse ran from it, back towards the window they entered through.

“Genji! Come on, it’s gonna blow any second!”

Genji looked up, eyes widening a bit, the red in them flickering. He tried to take a step, flesh hand going to his head when his leg buckled.

“Shit...” Jesse muttered, glancing at the detonator. He had time. He could make it. Peacekeeper sang as he ran. Ran for his life, ran to Genji. There was another window by him, they could go out that way. It lasted a lifetime. It lasted a second. Jesse grabbed Genji when he got to him, tugging him back up to stand.

“Come on! Just focus for me a little longer, alright? I need you to get up to that window and help me up, okay?”

“O-okay.”

The stutter was not intentional, Genji’s voice sounding more robotic than usual. Voicebox glitching. He blinked some more, then climbed the wall, reaching down for Jesse. His hand was taken, and they jumped from the window. Jesse jumped from the window.

Genji was not behind him.

“Genji? Genji!”

The detonator went off. Rubble flying, chunks of concrete, dust, fire. Jesse was blown back, arms up to cover his face. He felt debris hit him, his armour bending and cracking. Hit the ground and curled up, covering his head, eyes squeezed shut. When the rumbling stopped and the world was no longer shattering, Jesse finally glanced up. Ears ringing, dust in his lungs. He picked up his hat, blinking hard, coughing. Shook his head and ran into the rubble, calling for Genji but not hearing himself say it. Sound slowly started to come back to him, though, it was eerily quiet. Just the crackling of flames and debris falling.

“Genji! Come on, Shimada, where are you?!”

Jesse paused when he saw Genji’s sword laying toward the centre of the blast and he ran to it. Stumbled a bit, grabbed it from the ground. And there was Genji, lying just ahead of it, cybernetics sparking, blood running off his arm. From his nose. From his lips.

Jesse stared.

Genji’s faceplate was nowhere to be seen, scars littering his cheeks and around where synthetic met human. The bottom half of his jaw was black synthskin and mesh. A bruise was forming around one eye, cuts above it bleeding down his temple. With his eyes closed like this, he could almost be sleeping. Jesse stepped closer, kneeling beside him. Rolled him over and tilted his chin to the side, shaking him gently.

Pretty. Gods, he was so pretty.

“Genji? Hey, come on, do me one last favour and don’t be dead...Come on, bud...”

Genji’s eyelids fluttered, taking a shuddering breath in.

“Oh thank god. Alright, alright I got’cha. I’ll get us outta here.”

Jesse took his arm and hauled him over his shoulders, grabbing his katana once more and standing. Genji was heavier than he looked deadweight. Limp.

“You’ll be alright, we just gotta get back to the team, okay? Just hold on.”

Jesse did not even notice his limp until he was back in the alleyway, ducking behind cover and keeping one arm over Genji’s legs so he would not fall. Eyes peeled for any sign of danger. Three detonators going off all at once, destroying a building and the jammer within it was bound to draw in swarms of null sector. They needed to get out, and fast. Jesse tapped his comm.

“This is Agent McCree callin’ for immediate evac to Blackwatch team A-1207. We got lots of wounded and this place is about to get real hot. Does anyone copy?” Static was his only answer. Genji groaned softly, Jesse glancing at him.

Head hanging just off his shoulder. So close Jesse could see the veins under his eyes, the way his cuts were beginning to tack up. How long his lashes were, the little white scars by his temple that looked too old to be something he got from his brother or the cybernetics. Jesse’s comm crackled, drawing his focus back to the present.

“McCree, this is Fio, I copy. Commander sent me in to pick you all up when comms went down, said it was too risky leaving you like that. Been having to fight my way around null sector’s anti-aircraft weapons. I’ve got your coordinates, ETA five minutes.”

“Fio! You have no idea how happy I am to hear your voice, sweetheart,” Jesse laughed breathlessly, Fio giving a chuckle back.

“Glad to hear you’re not dead, cowboy.”

“Don’t jinx me, now, I still got five minutes to survive.”

“I think you’ll manage. Hang in there.”

Jesse grinned, making it back to the team and setting Genji down gently. Something felt off about letting anyone else see his face, though, so he wrapped his scarf around Genji’s shoulders and neck, his head hanging down into it and covering what normally was hidden. It felt like a violation of privacy, in an odd way. Jesse didn’t think Genji would have wanted to be seen by anyone, not even him.

Fio landed on time as promised, taking what was left of the team back to base. Jesse’s body was beginning to hurt, adrenaline wearing off and leaving him exhausted and throbbing. His foot was messed up, and his shoulder. His armour was torn in some places, but it had done its job for the most part. Bruises were all he would be left with instead of bullet holes and a punctured lung. His nose was bleeding. It took Martinez coming over to him to tilt his head back and press some gauze beneath it for him to notice.

Jesse was too busy looking at Genji to notice much else.

He was patched up, made Martinez move on to someone else after insisting he was alright, that everything else could wait until they got back to the med bay. The ride home was long, and Jesse slept through most of it.

-

His scarf was returned folded neatly, Genji presenting it to him without a word. His faceplate was back, eyes shifting to look at anything but Jesse. Jesse, who grinned and took it back, leaning against the doorframe when Genji did not immediately run off.

“Lookin’ all shiny and new there, bud. Good to see you up and movin’ again. You saved us back there with that idea of yours, you know.”

Genji stood there for a moment, nodding after another.

“I could not have done it alone. I know I said otherwise, but. I needed you there.”

Jesse tisked and waved his hand goodnaturedly.

“Aw, shucks. Makin’ me feel all special now.”

“Do not get used to it,” Genji huffed, his eyes crinkling just a bit. Jesse could imagine a smile on his face now. How good it would look, how pretty he would be with it.

“But thank you. For pulling me out of there. And for that,” Genji motioned to the scarf, arms settling across his chest.

“Anytime. We’re a team, yeah? I got your back when you need me, alright?” Jesse hesitated only a moment, reaching out and placing a hand on Genji’s bicep, squeezing lightly before letting go.

Genji watched his hand drop. Eyes flicking up to his, stance shifting. He set his shoulders and nodded.

“Alright.”

“I’ll see you at trainin’, then.”

“Yes, see you then.”

Jesse slipped back into his room when Genji turned to leave. Ran a hand over the scarf. Set it on the foot of his bed and went to finish typing up a report, Genji on his mind. Jesse smiled.

~~

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[lightsonparkave]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO LIGHTS ON PARK AVE! WE’RE OFFICIALLY A ONE-YEAR-OLD BABY (our birthday was on the 22nd). Join the celebrations by submitting a work! There’s one week left until Round 12 closes on August 31, and you have 80 prompts to choose from. There are no minimum work requirements or limit to how many works you can submit.

Not sure you can finish your work in time? Little messages are great presents too. What has the past year of Lights on Park Ave been like for you? Do you have a favorite prompt or round? A favorite LoPA work? Want to make a rec list of your favorites or wax poetic and show some love for a specific work and/or creator? Go for it. Let the Steve/Tony community know! The LoPA askbox is open or if you want to make your own Tumblr post or tweet, you can mention @lightsonparkave or tag #lightsonparkave. Whatever method you choose, I’ll make sure to share your message/post on here and Twitter.

Or maybe you’re not up to making anything this time. In that case, let’s take a walk down memory lane. Here are all 46 Lights on Park Ave works for previous rounds.

ART

3490 & 616

A comparison between 616 Civil War and universe 3490 where the war was averted by the marriage of Steve Rogers and Natasha Stark - @jarvisuanddumetoo​

ANY UNIVERSE

A framed portrait of a smiling Tony, drawn and signed by Steve - @hundredthousands

Steve steals his husband’s helmet and gives his king a springtime crown - @starksnack

AU

Tin soldier Steve and ballerina Tony dancing - @jarvisuanddumetoo

BATTLEWORLD

Steve watching Tony flying in on the battlefield - @thingexplainer

MCU

Old Steve holding flowers and seeing a blue butterfly after Tony’s death - @hundredthousands

So much of life feels like drowning... but when I’m with you my troubles recede like waves on the shore - @jarvisuanddumetoo

Stranger Things AU where Steve is the one who was experimented on in a lab and doesn’t understand pop culture and Tony is the guy with no powers who is still doing his best to fight these weird new aliens - @jarvisuanddumetoo

Steve and a dandelion that represents him weathering all his hardships over the years - @jarvisuanddumetoo

Tony on fire and Steve’s reaction - @jarvisuanddumetoo

Steve crying while holding Tony’s helmet after Tony’s funeral - @noririna

I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. You’re a hero. - @starksnack

ULTIMATES

Steve and Tony leaving marks on each other’s bodies that are only visible in the dark - @sirsapling Ults Steve and Tony are tragically bound to one another. They can always feel the trace of each others hands, it leaves an invisible mark they will cary with them till there is nothing left. Only a ghost of something lost in the chaos of the past.

FIC

1872

Say My Name - @citsiurtlanu Steve reminds Tony that there's more to him than the war his weapons were used in.

616

Snow Day - @captainneverever The Avengers think that Steve and Tony got engaged at the annual holiday party. It’s news to Steve and Tony.

Kiss me rough before you go - erde Tony is dying. His life is slipping away and Steve wants to be better than this, but he can't quite manage the feat. Tony's war has made a bitter man out of him, a lesser man.

Boys, boys, boys - Missy_dee811 (@viudanegraaa) (AU) Steve keeps putting off his oil change. Finally deciding to see the mechanic in town.

Without the rusty music of my machine - Missy_dee811 (@viudanegraaa)  Tony was lying on the hood of his car. He had taken off his leather jacket, gently folded it in half, and draped it across the windshield so he could rest his arms on the supple leather.

Muddy Waters - RossKL (@but-damn-is-he-lovable) (also on Tumblr) Tony bleeds. It's not real.

ANY

(A Dream is) A Wish Your Heart Makes - @helovedyou Cool evenings together and laughing free and all the nice things Tony never thought he’d get

Afternoon Off - Neverever (@captainneverever) Freedom is just another word for getting with your boyfriend on the downlow during a mission.

BULLET POINTS

Those We Were (For A While) - sadisticsparkle The blueprints hadn’t prepared Tony for the light bouncing off the battered metal, for the empty stare of its empty eye sockets or the dim circle in the middle of the chest. He traced its lines with his gaze, remembering every day he had spent hunched over the schematics picking its inner workings and every night he had spent sprawled under its pilot letting him take Tony apart.

MCU

border state - @areiton (also on Tumblr) They exist in the in between.

star crossed - @areiton (also on Tumblr) "The gods made the stars,” you whisper, a lifetime ago, a heartbeat ago, now, “and they were so bright, so beautiful and strong, that they ripped them in two. And half of ‘em fell to earth, and woke from the dust and walked as men.”

this is how - @areiton (also on Tumblr) This is how the world ends: Gaps in the code.

kiss me hard before you go - duckmoles​ & starxreactor (AU) “I love you, you know that?” Tony says just after popping another grape into Steve’s mouth. He watches as Steve’s jaw works, chewing and then swallowing. Steve smiles up at Tony with a bright, toothy grin. “I love you, too.” “I’m going to miss you,” Tony continues. “I’m going to call you everyday, okay? And—and, during the holidays I’ll show up at your house and we can—we can—sit together on the balcony, and—” The last day of summer, and it's time to hold on to what you might lose.

No Winter Lasts Forever - Fluffypanda (@ayapandagirl) Steve stopped, white breath clouding the air around him, to look at the little shoots of green and purple peeking out from the scant layer of snow left on the ground.

snippet of a post-apocalyptic A/B/O AU WIP - Fluffypanda (@ayapandagirl) Steve’s fingers traced the bite, a half-moon of red marks, from in front of the largest mirror he’d ever seen.

the first blush of morning - Fluffypanda (@ayapandagirl) (AU) The sun rises on the Atlantic ocean and Steve isn't alone - or is he?

Santa Paws - @heartsandmuses [I]f there were two things the public couldn’t get enough of, it was cute puppies and shirtless Captain America — and Tony, ever the philanthropist, decided to give the people exactly what they wanted, right on Christmas morning.

Philautia - @helovedyou Tony dies and Steve keeps on living. Well. He doesn’t die. Living might be a bit of a generous term

To the Victor - @helovedyou There are rainbows flying and people hugging and others ranting and raving, spittle flying, he thinks this. We have won this, this tiny victory.

Snippet of a WIP set post-IW - @ishipallthings The numbers keep climbing, for hours, in the aftermath.

Shuffle Off This Mortal Coil - jellybeanforest (@jellybeanforest-a-go-go) (also a Cap-IM Bingo 2020 round 1 fic) Tony hadn’t been a cruel man, but he had been a practical one. Or: In his twilight years, concerned about how his slow-aging possibly-immortal husband will adjust to his death, Tony builds an AI version of himself that he updates nightly, intending for it to keep Steve company after he’s gone. When the inevitable comes to pass, Steve doesn’t know what to make of the AI or whether its presence lessens his grief or makes it significantly worse. He’s leaning towards the latter.

Five Bells - @lazywriter7 (also on Tumblr) After returning the Stones, Steve takes a detour through time.

if we’re gonna heal, let it be glorious - @littlemissstark forgiveness. The salty air was intense enough to wake Steve up completely, snapping any left over drowsiness away. He was alert despite the sky still being a shade of navy that tapered into a purple at the sea’s horizon. The world was still dormant, but Steve couldn’t stay asleep – not when he woke to coldness on the right side of the bed and empty arms.

In My Hands and Gone Again - @nostalgicatsea (also on Tumblr) Memories were like fish, Tony had explained, or the tease of one. A flash of silver, and his hands would plunge down. Sometimes he would catch one; other times, it would dart out of reach. He wouldn’t be sure whether it had been real or just a trick of the light, after.

Leaving You Forward - @nostalgicatsea (AU) It would be easy, staying here like this with Tony. But Steve knew he couldn't—because he had never taken the easy way out and because he loved Tony.

i choose: me, you, us - @onlymorelove (also a Cap-IM Remix Madness 2020 fic) “We, uh. We’ve been together five years, and you’ve never— I’ve never let you see it. I told you I’d let you see it on our wedding night.” In which Tony and Steve marry, but Tony hasn't let Steve see the arc reactor—and the scars around it. Yet.

best of summers gone - rosycheeked (@lovelyisthedawn) Tony's favorite month has always been August.

when we all fall asleep - rosycheeked (@lovelyisthedawn) Tony wakes up and questions why Steve loves him. It's a surprisingly complex question for such a simple answer.

you anchor me (back down) - rosycheeked (@lovelyisthedawn) Steve still loves Tony, no matter what mask he’s wearing. He’ll never tell Tony that, though. He’s read enough books and watched enough movies to know that it only ends well when it’s just a story. Or, everyone needs an anchor sometimes, and Steve and Tony just happen to be each others’.

take me to the feeling - smalltonystark (@theotherwasdeath​) Steve looks gorgeous in the lights. He always looks stunning, but here, late at night, in the faint glow from the streetlamps underneath them and underneath the stars, he looks magnificent.

POETRY

A Toast to Cold, Hard Facts - @onlymorelove (also on Tumblr) The world is brutal and coarse, but...

Love was fading stars - @onlymorelove (also on AO3) Blackout poetry based on “Failing and Flying” by Jack Gilbert on top of an original print.

not married - @onlymorelove (also on Tumblr) Grief works in mysterious ways.

[billantoinette]

Do you remember you took a thrashing for me?

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[the-roanoke-society]

boys and girls of every age...

wouldn’t you like to see something strange?

happy halloween, my flowers!

this year hasn’t been the best--and the list of reasons why is as varied, as wide and as deep as all of creation.

it has, essentially, sucked on a truly cosmic level.

but!

it doesn’t help anyone to look at the big picture and only focus on the dark parts. because for all the truly horrible, disastrous events we’ve had to slog through together (first time crying every day for months, first time being taken by ambulance to the er--truly a year of firsts, at least for me, personally), there have still been good things.

for example, did you know that this year we celebrated the 6th anniversary of the release of kingsman: the secret service? and the 3rd anniversary of the release of kingsman: the golden circle--which means next month it’ll be the third birthday of the ronaoke society!

our house might’ve gotten quiet--but it still stands.

i love all of you very, very much, and halloween is still my favorite holiday of all time. so all this month, i worked on the aus you’ll find below the cut. i’ll have to post this in parts over the next while, as there’s thirty-one total--one for each day of the season, of course.

honestly--it felt fantastic to dig back into my horror roots. roanoke’s entire conception was inspired by the fact that for as much as i love the kingsman universe, i also love things that go bump in the night.

and i don’t like having to choose between one thing or another.

be forewarned: if you choose to look into the source material for these aus, be prepared for possible graphic violence, gore, disturbing themes, explicit sexuality and jumpscares. i sort of walked through the proverbial garden and just grabbed fruit where i could find it--you’ll see what i mean. and as always, the endings are in your hands. these ideas are gifts, to do with as you please.

so journey below the cut... i̷̛̝͎͎̝̣̹͊̓̂͛̃̋͟f̛̯̟̱̖͔̌͊͐̏̃̓̇̎͠ y͈͇̙̘̬̓͌̑̈́͛̿͌͠ở̴̢͉͉̳͙̞͈̻̀́̎̄́̈͢͡ȗ̵̬̳͙̫̥̜͍̲̔̐̽̃̀͒̑͜ ḑ̙̩̼̤͓̫̟̥̈͑̐̚͡a̧̢̦̟̙̤̠͐͌̾̆̑͌͡͞r̷̡̰̲̣͓̣̝͒́̿͊̉̀͒͠͝͠ͅe̫̯̣̰͍̤̬̭̺̒̿͊̾͊.

blackbird on the old church steeple - a butterfly knife au inspired by the silence of the lambs

rae clementine doesn’t frighten easily. in her line of work, fear is not a friend. so when she’s abruptly pulled out of her fbi training at quantico to interview none other than the notorious harry hart, known for his--let’s say unusual appetites--she’s less intimidated and more annoyed.

but women are being taken, and found without their skin, if they are even found at all.

if hart’s insight into the mind of a psychopath can help her find the infamous buffalo bill, who has repeatedly evaded arrest--then she is more than willing to sit across from the gentleman in a pristine cell, and be continuously surprised that for a murderer, his gaze is surprisingly gentle.

in the back of her mind, she remembered all the things her mother had ever told her about lucifer--how the king of hell himself was utterly wicked, but catastrophically beautiful.

charm could hide blood. polished etiquette could hide bodies.

“most serial killers keep some sort of trophies from the victims.”

“i didn’t.”

“no. you ate yours.”

she’d felt this kind of intrigue before, and given the face it wore this time... well.

focus on the case, she thought. find buffalo bill. watch yourself. get out alive.

mini soundtrack sampler includes: ajr, ‘bang!’ + tame impala, ‘the less i know the better’ + barney bigard, ‘readdy eddy’

dogs & deadbolts guard the night - an au featuring @roanoke-after-dark​‘s the gremlin and @agentjotunn​ inspired by resident evil, particularly the released imagery for resident evil: village

santi’s first thought was that the rumors were just blatantly untrue. an entire village of people? suddenly vanished? he doubted it. besides, winters this far north were brutal--and could be fatal, if you weren’t careful. they had probably just all tucked in for the season, he reasoned. the snow and ice would’ve made travel impossible, anyway.

weeks passed. the stories faded from his thoughts as he minded his garage, and people spoke less and less about it.

until one evening, when an old friend knocked on his door with blood on his jacket and no color in his face.

“bradley? jesus, what hap--”

“grab your gun. something’s happened, and we need to leave now.”

“but what--”

“i’ll explain on the way, just go!“

right before he slammed the passenger side door of bradley’s jeep closed--wheels appropriately chained to keep a grip on the iced over roads--he heard a deep, long howl from some distance away.

there hadn’t been wolves this close in fifty years.

santi broke the silence in the car gently: “... you look like you’ve seen the face of the devil. what exactly happened?”

mini soundtrack sampler includes: ac/dc, ‘highway to hell’ + think up anger ft. malia j, ‘smells like teen spirit’ + marilyn manson, ‘sweet dreams’

the light under the door - a body shots au inspired by dark skies

the blacks weren’t superstitious. jason wasn’t, just like his father wasn’t before him, and now that he’s finally settled down happily married to joanne--finally, he thought, finally married to his jo--he is more than ready to see what the next chapters will bring. they moved into a house not too far from his parents, so he could still see his siblings regularly.

and he did.

which means he and jo both noticed when his younger brother christopher began to act a little--off.

they noticed when the bruises appeared.

they noticed when he kept copying the same strange symbols onto papers in crayon over and over and over and over--

and jo definitely noticed when she walked into their own kitchen in the middle of the night to find every single cabinet door open, with all the contents arranged into an impossibly perfect pyramid on the center island.

“i--are we being haunted?” she wondered out loud, the next morning. “this--and weird things are happening at your parents’, too, jason, something isn’t right here. i know you don’t believe in ghosts or anything, but...”

and this wasn’t a haunting.

it was something much worse.

mini soundtrack sampler includes: kennyhoopla, ‘how will i rest in peace if i’m buried by a highway?’ + cannons, ‘fire for you’ + days, ‘the drums’

permission access eternal - an au featuring @siggy-the-meme-master​ and technical officer wyvern, inspired by a.m.i.

it was supposed to be the world’s most cutting edge ai software. and since jeremy and dodger were both at the top of their class at m.i.t., of course, nobody was surprised when both their names were on the finished product--even if there was just one prototype to start.

and it wasn’t an ‘it.’ it was a she. jeremy insisted. repeatedly. “let’s call her ami!” he’d been flush with booze but his eyes were so bright and his expression so sincere, dodger just let him have it. and jeremy clapped his shoulder, “we did it, man! we have built the jessica rabbit of ai programs!”

they had one last test run to prove they’d metaphorically kicked the ass of everyone else in their field before they began the work to begin mass production. so, dodger set ami up as a sort of overhead assistant for their shared lab. she controlled temperature, lights, she could make phone calls, keeps schedules and most importantly of all, place takeout orders. the more she proved she could do, the more power, and control, she was given.

two weeks passed. they gave ami a voice, gave her a large proverbial eye to see through, making tweaks as they went to polish her off.

dodger was so proud of his work his heart could’ve exploded.

so imagine how he felt when he realized he’d left his cell phone in his car--and realized he couldn’t open the door.

“ami? ... ami. can you unlock the front door please?” he stared up at the red lens, and a silent point of light stared back at him.

“... i’m sorry. i cannot do that. dodger.”

“... uh, jeremy?”

mini soundtrack sampler includes: cage the elephant, ‘social cues’ + sneaker pimps, ‘6 underground’ + saint motel, ‘preach’

in hell i’ll be in good company - a lies & lessons au inspired by underworld

for centuries, a war has raged between vampires and lycans, completely outside the notice of the general human population. lauren is a death dealer, a lethal and beautiful member of an elite squad of vampiric assassins who have been charged with finding all the remaining lycans in the city and taking them out one by one.

when she realizes the lycan pack seems to be looking for an ordinary man--a medical student named jack daniels--she tracks him down herself, narrowly escpaing lucian in the process. (as soon as they were in the car he was already screaming, “what the fuck is goin’ on?!” with a southern twang she hadn’t expected) she takes him under her wing, still baffled at why the lycan pack could possibly want him.

he’s only human, after all.

... right?

as it turns out, vampires and lycans have a single common ancestor.

jack is a direct descendant.

and after being bitten in an attack--becomes a hybrid, carrying the powers of both species.

between unraveling the truth surrounding the death of her family, what really happened between lucian and kraven, and her growing feelings for jack--who is rapidly trying to understand his role in the story that’s been unfolding without his knowledge for generations--lauren finds herself at a crossroads, and her loyalties tested to a breaking point.

but as long as jack is at her side--perhaps it doesn’t matter where the road goes from here.

as bullet-riddled and blood-soaked as it will turn out to be.

mini soundtrack sampler includes: wallows, ‘are you bored yet?’ + cage the elephant, ‘shake me down’ + puscifer, ‘rev 22-20′

ash, fog & rust - alternatively titled ‘@gaygent​, @agent-judas​ and agent seraphim finally take that road trip to pennsylvania’

it was time to hand over the torch. that’s what lilith had finally decided. between the white patches in her hair, the strain it was putting on her relationships (especially with hamish)--morgan only had to return to the hills one more time as envoy.

and she wasn’t going alone.

“after this, anything that comes through this area, anything that hits our radars, is going to end up on both your desks,” she began, glancing at z in the passenger seat, and meeting cillian’s eyes once in the rearview mirror.

“so this is--what, a test run?” z asked, head slightly tilted. morgan hummed.

“this place--this town--it--” she huffed, frustrated. cillian could hear the leather wrapped around the steering wheel creak as her grip tightened. “it’s hard to explain, to someone who hasn’t been there. and i’m glad that neither of you have had to go before this, but...” another sigh. “i couldn’t think of any other duo that i could entrust this to. not something this big. you--” she pointedly lifted her brows at z, “--have experience with creatures that aren’t from around here. and you--” this time her gaze went to cillian. “--do too. just in a different shape. it’ll take both of you to handle centralia. and i couldn’t introduce you without coming along.”

“how long, exactly, has roanoke been keeping tabs on this place?” cillian asked. he’d spent hours going over everything he could find--mission logs, reports, feeds and images housed in the media room. morgan looked at him again. her eyes were still kind--but very, very tired.

“... a long time.”

i’ll admit that this is less an au and more a canonical event that i just haven’t gotten around to writing more about. but i couldn’t make this list without at least one entry paying homage to a franchise that’s had a huge influence on not just me as a writer, but on roanoke’s canon as a whole.

for the sampler, i will simply redirect you to this post here.

the devil’s gonna set me free - an anchored hearts au inspired by horns

joseph moretti had been in love with louise franz since fifth grade.

granted, he didn’t realize it until he almost drowned because of that stupid dare--a dare that not only almost killed him, but took two of lee’s fingers when that goddamn cherry bomb went off in his hand.

the same cherry bomb he’d traded to him for fixing louise’s broken necklace--a small silver pendant, shaped like an apple. she’d worn it every single day since he could remember. the image of her and snow white were eternally tangled in his head.

that necklace--it’d been the start. he’d woken up because of an apple. louise, did, too.

the hours they spent in that treehouse, listening to david bowie and memorizing every scar and curve of the other--he wished that could have been his eternity. just him. and her. ... well, and bowie. every good love story needed a soundtrack.

but... but...

his head pounded as he lifted it off the counter in his parents’ kitchen. his mouth was dry, and he blinked, causing a half-empty bottle of vodka to come into focus.

louise is gone now, he thought.

and they thought he was the one who did it. he, the one who loved her more than anyone else on the planet.

he pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes.

he was going to prove his innocence even if it killed him. no matter what happened.

even if he sprout horns.

mini soundtrack sampler includes: machine gun kelly, ‘bloody valentine’ + the black keys, ‘go’ + david bowie, ‘heroes’

moonlight rising from the grave - alternatively titled ‘that time @agent-nightcrawler​ and agent iuniore found a haunted mansion,’ inspired by disney’s haunted mansion

“hello? ... hellooooo?” the massive door let out a huge groan as sylva pushed, putting one hand on tina’s shoulder as it swung open. “uhm--i’m really sorry to bother you, but we hit a deer and we just...” sylva sighed, her voice lowering in volume. “... need to use the phone...”

“this place is gigantic,” tina whispered, close at sylva’s side as they stepped out of the pouring rain into a very quiet, very elegant foyer. “and look! there’s lights, and all these lit candles... someone has to be here,” she continued as the door came to a gentle close behind them, muffling another roll of thunder.

“good evening.”

both of them yelped, sylva immediately yanking tina closer to her and whirled around in time to see--a butler? he was dressed like a butler.

and his clothes were... he was...

“sylva! why is the butler see-through!” tina whispered harshly, all while the spectral gentleman just looked at them expectantly. sylva clamped a hand over her mouth.

“hi!” she answered brightly.

this is a ghost. i’m talking to a ghost. this is fine. everything is fine.

“uh,” she coughed, beginning again, “we’re just having a little bit of a car emergency, is there a way we can call our head office? so they can come get us?” this is what i get for being out where i have no bars, and neither of us have our specs...

the ghostly butler nodded. his hair, glowing faintly, waved around his head as though he was underwater. “of course. please--follow me. the master of the manor will want to meet you.”

mini soundtrack sampler includes: the chordettes, ‘mr. sandman’ + bobby pickett, ‘monster mash’ + bastille, ‘survivin’’

mercy no more - a magic & mischief au inspired by the evil within

aly had been kieran’s partner at the krimson city police department for years. she’d walked with him through the death of his daughter, the disappearance of his wife.

neither of them acknowledged the spark. they didn’t then, and--as she met his eyes once in the rearview mirror, trying to pay attention to connelly and joseph as they talked about beacon--they wouldn’t acknowledge it now.

as soon as the hospital came into a view, a high-pitched ringing overame every other sound in the cruiser, every other sound period. aly slammed her hands over her ears, but it didn’t seem to help.

as soon as it started--it stopped. connelly had to swerve to avoid getting into the wrong lane.

“what--what was that?” aly asked, her palms still hovering by her ears.

“it was probably just a problem with the radio,” joseph suggested, pushing his glasses up as they drove pass the established police barriers.

the last dispatch team, they said, hadn’t come back. it was up to the three of them to find out what happened to their colleagues.

aly was close by kieran’s side as they walked through the rain. her gut twisted at the sight of the entry doors.

the smell of the blood and the slaughter hit her nose before she saw the bodies.

“what on earth happened here?”

“i don’t know. stay close. let’s find the surveillance room. if we can find the security cams, we’ll find out answer...”

if only that had been the end.

mini soundtrack sampler includes: all time low, ‘monsters’ + bastille, ‘what you gonna do???’ + gary numan, ‘long way down’

and the wind will be my hands - an au featuring @agent-sentinel-official​, @agent-chimera​ and @gaygent​, inspired by session 9, with a special appearance by @agent-thorn​

walter vaughn was an expert in abestoes abatement. so when he put in a bid to take on the entire danvers state mental hospital, the owners of the rotting estate welcomed him on board.

and as they did, he brought on two crewmates--xander, and z--to help him.

“we’ve got three weeks, so, no need to rush,” he explained on the first day, the sun beating down on his broad shoulders and half his hazmat tied around his waist. xander and z trailed behind him as they approached the massive building. “and i know, i know it’s still a big undertaking--but the money will be worth it. trust me.”

“you fellas our cleanup crew?” a tall, thin man in a suit with dark hair and a pair of ray ban sunglasses walked towards them, smiling broadly. he extended a hand, “carter jensen. the ah, danvers’ estate board sent me on their behalf to give you a tour of the building, let you get a good assessment of what you’re dealing with. i’m not entirely sure what they’ll do with the property when this is done, but we know for sure nothing can happen until this part’s complete. come on, the entrance is just this way... i’ll make sure to give you a master key ring.”

xander leaned down by z’s shoulder, muttering, “dude this place gives me the creeps... but maybe there’s still some cool old stuff left in there. like maybe, possibly, the trapped souls of the damned. you think it’s haunted?”

z answered, murmuring, “if not by ghosts--then maybe by something else.”

mini soundtrack sampler includes: the talking heads, ‘psycho killer’ +  lou barlow, ‘choke chain’ + sublime, ‘doin’ time’

[that-banana-headed-bovine]

Knight Rider 2000

WARNING

This post contains spoilers for Knight Rider 2000, the 1991 film which attempts to expand on the canonical universe of Knight Rider (1982-1986).  Key word, attempts.  I know that this film came out almost 30 years ago at this point, but I also know that this fandom grows a little bit every day, and there will ALWAYS be people who haven’t seen every episode (myself included), let alone every movie!  I happened to catch it on Charge! for Hoff's birthday (yes I'm hella late posting this LOL) with my good friend @trust-doesnt-oxidize​, and boy let me tell you, it was… Something.

From here on out, I’m not holding back from sharing my impression of the film based on specific details from it, so if you want a spoiler-free viewing, go watch it and come back!!  Or… don’t, it’s kind of awful.  I can only think of one thing in canon that it may spoil, and even that appears in early Season 2 and is fairly minor, so if you are curious about it, I HIGHLY recommend watching it BEFORE reading this.  The scenes with the most impact are touching because they come as a surprise, so even if you know the general plot of the film, I would recommend watching it first.

Also this is really rambley because I have a lot of emotions about this series and, by extension, this movie.  I really don’t blame you if you click away here, but if you DO read it all the way through, I would love to hear anything you would like to add, agree or disagree!

OKAY!  Knight Rider 2000 is a movie that exists!  And I hate it!

The film sets up an interesting argument between two groups of people whose names I don’t remember because they were boring (except for Devon, I know his name at this point).  In this interpretation of the “future,” gun control has been implemented to,,, some extent, I can’t entirely tell if there have been some policies implemented across the country or if it is all localized in this one city that even the Wikipedia page for this movie doesn’t bother to mention.  And no, this city is NOT in California for once!  Usually I would be happy to see a change of setting, but considering that everything in this film felt so foreign to the Knight Rider that we know, it would have been nice to at least have a familiar setting.  Anyway, gun control stuff.  The debate between whether these gun control policies are ethical or not is very interesting.  Innocent people are dying because the wrong people have guns and the police are rendered useless when they themselves don’t have access to weapons.  This argument happens to support my perspective on the issue, so I appreciated how it took a look at that side WITHOUT it sounding like we are crazy murderer people, but I digress.  It makes sense that the ban happened in the first place, because much like how the main conflict in Pixar’s latest film Incredibles 2 revolves around society’s over-reliance on superheroes, I could see Knight Rider’s society becoming dependent on technology to save them.  It can be easy to seem like the most advanced tech in that society is present only in KITT and KIFT, and to SOME extent that is true.  However, Shawn does say that it is relatively common in this society for people to have memory chips in their brain.  That counts for something.  And the police DO have a defense mechanism according to the Wikipedia page for this movie, it’s just nonlethal.

So as you can see, I am very interested in the conflict this world sets up.  I sure hope they expand on these conflicting ideologies throughout the film, giving us a clearer idea of why the bans were set in place AND giving us insight into what exactly has caused some revolt against it.  That subject is seemingly timeless, and with how decently the introduction tackled it, I have some confidence that this film could pull it off in a tasteful way.  Wouldn’t that be amazing?   It’s some of the most serious subject matter Knight Rider has ever tackled.  It’s so interesting!

Yeah they pretty much abandon that plot in place of a very, very bad copy of the original show’s “Hearts of Stone” (season 1, episode 14).  Illegal guns exist and are bad, but we don’t really know why.  I may know a little better if I had been listening closer, but I was trying to not get so bored that I missed Kitt’s parts!

At some point during this sequence, we are introduced to Shawn, a happy police officer who is happy to have a family on a happy birthday.  And then she gets shot!  Due to head force trauma rendering her unconscious, she’s sent to the hospital.  She goes in for a risky operation that miraculously saves her life against all odds.

Then, Michael wakes up with Garthe Knight’s face and hears a great story about how one man CAN make a difference!… I mean what?  

Jokes aside, it’s kind of amazing how much this very Michael-esque sequence comes across very differently.  It’s almost the perfect example of why I don’t like this movie.  The surgery is weirdly realistic for a Knight Rider entity.  There’s blood and screens and surgeons and a sterile white room for operations.  Michael woke up in a Medieval castle with one doctor and two random people he’d never met at his side.  Shawn’s situation clearly makes more sense, but is it half as fun and whimsical?  No, no it’s not.  This whole film comes across as depressing to me, and it’s only worsened by what’s to come.  Apparently, she had KITT’s CPU/Microprocessor/something sciencey implanted into her brain.  That’s especially strange since all that I saw was a yellow liquid being injected directly into her skull!  That’s a lovely image, and definitely gave me the idea that there was a full computer chip going in there???  (It may have actually been explained more clearly, and I just looked away because eek weirdly bloody operation scene)  This caused her personality to do a full 180.  So, Shawn is going to be fun, snarky, and full of personality like KITT is because they share memories now!  Right?  Right???

I think they tried to do that, but it came across flat.  So flat.  She speaks in a purposefully monotone, robotic voice and delivers downright mean comments that leave Michael and KITT scratching their heads.  She seems to lack basic empathy until her own memories start flooding back, and at that point, the emotions she show seem so foreign to the character we see that it’s not remotely believable.  You want me to believe that this robotic woman with -10 personality points started nearly crying after one string of memories, albeit a very traumatic one, entered her mind?  This would have been believable if she was entirely changed afterwards, coming across as far more human, but that was only the case sometimes.  It also would have been believable if the film had the same energy that the original Knight Rider show does, where suspending one’s disbelief is necessary to make it past the opening credits.  However, this movie tries to be so grounded that the kind of dramatic beats that would work in the original seem forced here.

Shawn is not the only character who I take issue with, though.  Let’s start with the most potentially problematic change from the usual canon in the entire film: KITT’s personality.  I have very mixed feelings on how he is portrayed.  If you’ve seen as much as a spattering of quotes from this movie, you probably could sense that KITT was… off.  When KITT first comes on screen, he slams Michael with a wave of insults, and none of them come off as their normal joking around.  However, I don’t necessarily have a problem with that because he has the proper motivation to be very, very upset.  He is sitting on a desk as a heap of loosely connected parts that have just enough power to make the signature red scanner whir and make an oddly terrifying red light eyeball thing (Hal???) move.  The first thing he hears is Devon nonchalantly saying something along the lines of, “I’m afraid he was recycled” to explain why KITT has been deactivated for OVER A DECADE and is not currently in anything that moves (my Charge! stream thing lagged at this point but @trust-doesnt-oxidize​ has since told me that Devon DID appear upset about KITT's being sold, but KITT likely wouldn't have heard that and what Devon said seemed to be moreso directed at HOW the chip was sold and not the fact that it was sold in the first place).  KITT is justifiably mad, and if they had kept KITT’s actions in character while his emotions said otherwise, I would have no problem with it at all.

However, once KITT’s CPU is somehow implanted into Michael’s Chevrolet, KITT does not act in character.  Shawn drives, not Michael, so it stands to reason that he would not necessarily listen to her.  She stole his CPU, his life for over a decade.  KITT does tend to listen to human companions, regardless of whether he is programmed to or not, but I can see where this would be an exception.  However, Michael soon intercedes and essentially tells him to cut it out.  Based on everything that the original Knight Rider told us, KITT no longer has a choice of whether to listen or not.  Michael is ultimately the one who calls the shots because of KITT’s very programming.  And yet, in this scene, KITT doesn’t listen to Michael and apparently gets so angry that he downright stops functioning.  Because that happens all the time in the original series!

And if you’re wondering where I got the conclusion that KITT frustrated his circuits to the point where they could no longer work, he said that.  KITT.  Admitted to having feelings.  In fact, he did not just admit to being angry in the moment.  He told Michael that, while it may seem like he is an emotionless robot, he does have a “feelings chip.”  A FEELINGS CHIP-

I am for recognizing KITT’s obvious emotions as much as the next guy.  I think they are often overlooked when discussing his character.  While I don’t think that real artificial intelligence will ever reach the level of human consciousness, the entire energy of Knight Rider comes from playing with this concept by portraying an AI character who clearly emotes interacting with a human who doesn’t seem to know that.  But the thing that makes this show feel so sincere is that neither character plays too heavily into that trope.  While not always knowing how much KITT feels and by extension hurting those feelings alarmingly often, Michael recognizes it enough to work in concert with KITT, apologize for his more major flubs, and consider KITT a friend.  And KITT subverts the trope by never recognizing that he has feelings to begin with.  He will say that he cannot feel sadness but, in the next breath, say that something upset him.  He will say he cannot hold a grudge only to immediately rattle off a string of insults directed at the person he clearly has a grudge on.  The show is magic in how these two characters display a subtle chemistry that always has room to grow because both characters are slowly coming to see each other for who they truly are and supporting one another along the way.  From what I can tell, the original show never fully concludes that arc, and it may even start regressing after Season 1.  However, we can feasibly see how Michael could slowly come to understand that KITT really does feel things just as much as he does.  And we can imagine the relief KITT would feel knowing that Michael was never bothered by that possibility.

So, you can see where I have a big problem with KITT spelling it out so plainly.  The audience gets full confirmation about what has been displayed to us through nuanced hints throughout the series, which sounds a lot more satisfying than it really ends up being in this film.  But worse than an underwhelming conclusion to a thrilling story, Michael knows it plain as day.  There is very little buildup to KITT admitting this.  He barely even sounds moved.  Instead, in this movie, the “feelings chip” is a fact of life that does not need to be covered up in the slightest.  Michael himself doesn’t really… react.  He just kind of nods along, as if he’s saying, “Huh, makes sense, alright.”  After everything these two have been through, if there really was such a simple explanation for why KITT is the way he is… why arguments went south, why the mere mention of a Chevrolet was enough to get a seemingly jealous response, why inconsequential things like music taste and gambling were subjects of debate, why KITT had always acted so exaggeratedly dismissive when topics of emotional significance struck a chord, why every little sarcastic banter had a hint of happiness until it didn’t… don’t you think Michael would do something?  Whether that something would be a gentle, “I always knew that, pal”; a shocked, “Why didn’tchya tell me sooner?!”; or even a sarcastic, disbelieving, “Yeah, right” is up to interpretation.  But there would be something.

And yet, even that concept is flawed.  We learn a lot from KARR’s inclusion in the original series, and what I take away from it boils down to a simple sentiment.  FLAG never meant for their AIs to be human.  I do realize that directly contradicts what Devon says within this film, but I see that as another way for the film to steer the plot in this direction, not as a tie in to the original.  When Wilton says that one man CAN make a difference, he means that.  He isn’t considering that KITT is just as much a person as Michael.  He’s not seeing that, at the end of the day, teamwork is what makes the show work, even if Michael is the glue that holds it together.  So, I think that to say that there is a “feelings chip” is to disregard the entire point of the original, that in this world life finds a way of inserting itself and that KITT’s (and KARR’s for that matter) humanity is an anomaly, not the rule.  At the end of the day, KITT’s humanity can’t be explained away with science.  And really, I don’t think it should be explained away at all.  The show has had an amazing trend of showing us how KITT feels, in all its unorthodox glory, alongside private moments that had me sobbing like a baby.  The movie should just be like a longer, more complex episode of Knight Rider… Although I cannot pinpoint exactly how it should be done in the context of this film, I know there are ways that Michael could have been shown that KITT feels rather than being told.

One last complaint, albeit a more minor one, is the idea that he has to listen to what Shawn says over Michael's authority.  I have spent a decent amount of time thinking about this one point, which has caused a lot of the delay in posting this.  There's multiple reasons why this flies right in the face of what is canon in the original series.  Perhaps the most obvious of these problems is the fact that, in the original pilot episode, it's made very clear that KITT can't assume control of the Knight 2000 without Michael's express permission unless Michael is unconcious.  Devon makes it quite clear in this episode that KITT is programmed specifically to listen to Michael, not just anyone who happens to be piloting the vehicle at the time.  In case there was any doubt about this, KITT ejects two people who are attempting to steal him later in the episode (well, ok, later in the two-parter, I don't know if it was the same episode or not).  The show isn't SUPER strict about this in future episodes, but it does at least acknowledge Michael's authority in a few pivotal moments throughout Season 1 (I can't comment on episodes that I haven't seen yet, but I suspect that this pattern continues).  Of all the rules set up throughout the series, it actually seems to be the most loyal to this one.  One moment that stands out to me is in Trust Doesn't Rust when KITT attempts to stop Michael from causing a head-on collision with KARR, but Michael then overrides him and the climax unfolds.  If one of the most iconic moments in the series is caused by this one bit of programming, to throw it out in the film is to disrespect the basis of the original series.

Speaking of KARR, he provides yet another reason niglecting this detail is such a big problem.  From what we can tell, KARR isn't programmed to one specific driver (at least, not anymore[?]), and so he can override anyone in the pilot's seat.  This is something they seem to highlight in TDR as well, although not so plainly as the previous point.  KARR ends up ditching Tony to gain speed and get an upper hand in the chase with Michael and KITT (although a scene they deleted would have made this a mUCH MORE SENSIBLE ACTION THAT R E A L L Y ISN'T A BETRAYAL but y'know what this post isn't about that) whereas KITT has to listen to Michael even to his own detriment.  If this one feature is indeed one of the major things that separates KITT from KARR, the idea that Shawn can override all of that cheapens the original conflict between KITT and KARR.

...Well okay, let's be real, KARR was never that compelling as an antagonist to begin with because he's a LOYAL SWEETIEPIE-- I'll stop.

And finally, we have the biggest, most bizarre reason that this is a problem:

If Shawn can override Michael's authority, that means KITT can override Michael's authority.

Why?  This would be the first time (outside of episodes where some sort of reprogramming or mind control was involved) in the series that KITT had not only listened to another human instead of Michael, but also listened to that person OVER Michael.  The only difference I can see between Shawn and quite literally anyone else in the show's history is that Shawn has KITT's chip implant thing.  If that's the reason her opinion has more credence than Michael's, then wouldn't that mean KITT's own opinion has that authority?  If that is the case, literally every example I've gone through in the last couple of paragraphs is not just challenged but rather negated entirely.

The most frustrating thing about this scene is that it simply didn't have to happen.  Michael could have gone along with KITT's plan, showing him (and us) that he does trust his former partner even after all these years.  Shawn could have convinced Michael to go along with it using her... feelings chip.  Blegh.  Or we could have had a stubborn Michael force this scene to be delayed, likely improving the pacing overall.  Maybe we could have even seen a frustrated and emotionally exhausted Shawn wait until Michael is not in the car and then plead KITT to give her the truth, no matter what Michael says.  We have seen KITT control his actions without Michael's input plenty of times, and we could have seen some more of his humanity show through if he could relate to Shawn's struggles... after all, he too has missing memories because she has his chip.  They're both going through a bit of an identity crisis.  I'm sure that he could find some workaround in his programming to help her if Michael wasn't there insisting that he does not take this course of action.

But even after all of that fussing over what has been done wrong with KITT, I can’t deny that he is the heart and soul of this film.  There was only one scene in this film that brought me near tears.  I got more of an emotional impact from this one clip than I have from a lot of movies that are undeniably much better.  Michael’s old-fashioned Chevrolet does not hold up in the year 2000, and it is clear that the usual car chase sequence won’t work as police vehicles quickly creep up on them.  I was personally very curious what they would do here.  I figured that KITT would find some way to outsmart the drivers of the police cars, maybe by ending up on an elevated mountain road that trips up the other drivers and causes them to waste time turning around and hopping on that same path.  Or, maybe, KITT would access a road that’s too narrow for the relatively bulky police cars.  However, it quickly becomes clear that this city is made up of wide roads on the ground.  As KITT veers off the road and tells Michael to trust him, the I found myself having to trust him.  This isn’t the way Knight Rider chases usually go, and with all these odds stacked against him, the only thing we can do is hold our breath.  The way this scene is staged to send us into this just as blind as Michael is, frankly, genius.  Water slowly creeps into the frame as a feeling of dread builds at the thought of what KITT might do.

Surely, we are led to think, he will knock into some boxes and turn right back around.  Right?  We’re reminded of the fact that this is not the Knight 2000, that there is no chance of this car floating.  That if KITT does what he really seems to be doing, there’s no chance… but he wouldn’t, would he?  This is the only action sequence in the film that had me at the edge of my seat, staring wide eyed at the screen.  And then, the turn that you want so badly to come doesn’t, and you have to wonder what’s about to happen.  What was KITT thinking?  Won’t Michael and Shawn drown?  And, most prominently in my mind, won’t KITT drown?

For a moment, this scene plays us into believing that, because magic FLAG science that is pretty par for the course, everything is fine.  KITT explains that they have an airtight cab and over 20 minutes of oxygen.  Everyone lets out a collective breath of relief.  We see it in Michael and Shawn, and I know I felt myself relax.

And then there’s a flicker in the screen, and that pit in the bottom of my stomach came right back.  Michael is confused, and KITT explains what we should have realized was inevitable.  This is KITT sacrificing himself.  He even goes as far as to let Shawn know that she can use any of his computer chips that she may need.  This comes off as strange at first, but it goes to show that KITT is, at his core, the same kind soul we always knew.  He acts angry because he feels betrayed, but given the choice, he will chose another person’s life over his own, always.  Even the microprocessor that he is most frustrated over, the thing that seems to drive a wedge between him and Shawn, is just how he is expressing his hurt.  Now, thinking it is the end, he offers it up freely, and Shawn doesn’t seem to know how to respond.  KITT is calm as he says his final goodbyes.  And this is the first place in the film that we get to hear the amazingly nuanced  voice acting that William Daniels is so great at.  KITT sounds collected and at peace with what is to come, but there are also subtle hints that he is at least a bit nervous, a bit sad.  “I know.  I guess this is goodbye.”  He doesn’t want to leave his friends, but he knows that he has to for them to be safe.  Even if the pacing of the film seems to actively try to undermine this moment, it stands out to me as an amazing scene, even if the reaction from Michael is underwhelming at best and the reaction from Shawn is… as much as can be expected from Shawn, but that’s not saying much.  As far as KITT knows in that moment, these are his last words: “Michael, take care of yourself.”  Down to the last moment, Michael is everything to him.

IjustwannamakeitclearquicklythatIthinktheirrelationshipisentirelyplatonicokthankyou

And I felt sad, big time sad.  The movie up until that point was unbelievably boring to me, and this wasn’t a turning point where the movie suddenly became great.  It was a moment so darn good that I almost don’t think the movie deserved for it to have as big of an impact as it did.  But that shows just how powerful this universe is, how wonderfully honest these characters are.  Even after being butchered practically beyond recognition, one scene in-character can still bring you to tears because you have connected with them so deeply throughout the TV series.

AND THEN DEVON DIED IMMEDIATELY AFTERWARDS :D

I don’t like Devon.

Devon was actually more tolerable in this movie than normal, and I can see where people who don’t hate him could be sad that he died  I just,,, he has hurt or talked down to KITT and KARR so many times that I actually could not sympathize.  What’s even more frustrating about that is that Devon’s death is the one that Michael got all sad over when KITT sacrificed his life for him and Devon got kidnapped randomly but okay go off movie you can’t ruin that scene for me.  I knew going in that Devon died, but I was expecting them to spend a lot more time setting it up and making it as dramatic as possible.  Nope, he just got a shot to the old air tanks I guess?  My view of it is nothing more than that it’s a thing that happened.

OH AND DEVON DID PULL ONE HEINOUS ACT.  He said that KIFT was better than KITT in every way other than that KITT has humanity.  SINCE WHEN HAS DEVON GIVEN ONE SINGULAR HOOT ABOUT THE AI’S BEING ALIVE???  TELL KARR THAT???  HECK, TELL DEACTIVATED KITT THAT YOU WERE JUST FINE SELLING OFF AT AUCTION THAT?!?!  Also also, KIFT DOES NOT C O M P A R E TO KITT.  We are coming back to KIFT in a moment, don’t you worry.  For now, I just.  Low blow, Devon, low blow.

Michael was fine too, he played a weirdly small part and that felt off but everything he said seemed pretty in character.  The most out of character parts were when he said nothing at all.  OH AND WHERE HE WAS REPLACING BONNIE but that’s besides the point, no Bonnie OR April… no Bonnie OR April… I’m fine…

…

It feels like this movie wants you to forget that Michael exists because Shawn is here she’s more interesting, right?  Right???

She’s really not.

So back to KIFT.  My favorite part of KIFT is that pronouncing KIFT in your head sounds funny.  It’s like “gift” but if the gift were actually an underwhelming villain of sorts that is overtaken in a garage, parked, by Michael either removing his microprocessor entirely or moving it to a Chevrolet.

I was surprised how not bad KIFT looked.  I had seen stills from the movie that looked really uninteresting compared to the regular designs, and while I still agree to some extent, it was a lot more epic than I would have thought.  Something about how the paint shines on it is captivating.  I was genuinely happy when KITT was moved to the snazzy red vehicle, although a big part of that could have been how disgusting mint green looks with red.  Seriously, including the red scanner on that bizarre seafoamy-bluey car (and yes, I do think it is a very pretty car by itself) was like when people say movies were “inspired” but in the opposite direction.  And the scanner looked weirdly small?  Was it just me?

Am I the only one who feels w e i r d just looking at this??

I think this is the most normal thing to be categorized as being in uncanny valley but there we go, I did it.  It’s not right.

Anyway, as neat as KIFT looks, it is no comparison to the classic Knight 2000 or even Season 3 KARR.  Red can be striking, but not when the classic scanner is also red.  No contrast!

KIFT is absurdly easy to forget, and I don’t think that the car’s design has anything to do with it.  KITT spends most of the movie piloting that car, and while it is not what we are used to, it doesn’t come across as super lame to me, either…or at least, not because of the design.  The biggest problem with KIFT is, I think, simply his voice.  His voice feels so out of place in the movie, and it’s so strange to me considering that Daniels’ voice is integrated just fine.  The recording sounds too crisp, too clean.  KITT’s voice always has a great deal of character, a very Earthy-sounding voice for an AI character.  I actually think that this incongruity is purposeful, and it’s a very clever concept.  We are supposed to recognize that KIFT isn’t human like KITT is.  KIFT sounds out of place in the real world among real people; he’s too neat around the edges.  It’s especially obvious when KITT and KIFT talk to each other.  This is also mirrored by how KITT occupies a well-loved Chevrolet that has little imperfections that make it feel real whereas KIFT is in this red… whatever it is that feels like it comes out of a sci-fi film.  This effect would have really worked if we had enough time with KIFT to understand his personality–or, more aptly, his lack of personality.  What makes this not work is the fact that we spend practically no time with KIFT.  We don’t get to hear what he feels he is programmed to do, we don’t get to hear him deliver the sort of lifeless lines that Shawn did that made her so unlikable, and we don’t even get to hear his voice more than 4-5 times.  Every time comes as a shock, taking us out of the moment of the film.  We could have gotten used to his crisp sound if he had spoken more, and we may have seen the actual plot significance of it.  Instead, it pulls you right out of the movie.

Oh yeah, and the only line(s?) that KIFT delivers to KITT are full-on taunting… that’s not very lifeless of you KIFT.

Alright, just one last thing to really hammer home a point from earlier and conclude this whole thing.  You know what I was saying about this movie lacking the whimsical nature of the TV show?  Well, the final chase puts the icing on this oddly sullen crab cake.

Yes, crab cake. 

Because the pinchy crab that is Shawn makes it quite painful to get this particular cake and icing doesn’t even belong on it anyway.

KITT is racing down the street in this bright red car that I just explained is thematically wrong for him to be driving tbh but whatever, he’s racing in it and comes up to a barricade of randomly stacked up cars.

Oh Yeah, we all know what is coming.

The music swells.  Michael looks at the upcoming barricade with furrowed eyebrows and quietly asks KITT what the heck they’re going to do now.

OH YEAH, we definitely know what is coming.

And at last, for the first time in the film…

KITT veers off to the right and they drive on water.  “It’s really sink or swim with you, isn’t it?” Michael asks, pretending that’s funny as if I am not still emotionally raw from that scene that happened an hour ago.

Apparently, KIFT had that one obscure feature from “Return to Cadiz,” the Season 2 episode where April forces KITT to follow KARR into the ocean on the hopes that waterproof wheels might work maybe, directly ignoring his many attempts to get out of it.  Yay.  I love references to That Episode.  That Episode which baited me with an opening that looked like KARR could have been discovered underwater only to show me that not only was there no KARR, but KITT was going to be bullied into repeating what his brother did when he died.  Wholesome.  Lovely.  Fantastic.  And how did KITT know for sure that would work?  KITT clearly still has some technical hiccups in his own CPU from Michael tampering with it, that was an awful lot of confidence to place in a maybe.

AND MORE IMPORTANTLY…

THIS MOVIE DID NOT HAVE A TURBO BOOST

A TURBO BOOST

I cannot believe that a movie based around Knight Rider did not have a turbo boost (or for that matter, the THEMESONG???).  Like I am honestly still surprised by it.  Almost every episode of the original show had at least one turbo boost, and there is a reason.  The idea of a talking car jumping in midair, sometimes with Michael “WOO!”-ing like a girl, is so fantastically fun that nobody even tries to question how impossible it is.  I think we all know how impossible it is, and that doesn’t matter, it is yet another thing that embodies the heart of this show.

And… not even one.

…

So yeah, that just happened.  I think this is technically a small novel.  Wow.

  I know that I'm still missing a lot... I have a lot of thoughts about this movie, and if you for some reason want more please ask!  I would also love to hear your thoughts on this!  Do you agree with my analysis?  Do you disagree entirely?  Did you notice something that I failed to mention entirely?  Pleasepleaseplease send ideas, I would love to hear them!  Also know that, no matter how much I was disappointed by the movie itself, I am fully open to hearing your ideas about how to improve or expand upon it.  I truly believe that this film introduced some great concepts, and I would absolutely adore seeing them reworked in a way that's more true to the original.  Thank you for reading! :D