#he's thinking in the first panel: who tf is that guy

[fkapple]

Emily and Shane on farm life

[littlelightfish]

Something I loved from the anime adaptation on episode 5:

They made a summary about Mick's and Kuro's characters and relationship from what they saw in this two panels on the few seconds this scene taked place.

Just this. Kuro and Mick both surprised on the first. Kuro looking at Mick like he's worried about something, and Mick eating bread in silence, looking in distrust at the guy.

The anime makes it so rich on subtle expressions, I'm in love here. They're just on the background of the scene. But what they do says really a lot about them.

When the guy first comes to scene, Mick looks a bit confused but nothing else. "Who tf this guy?" They're not planing on paying him any mind.

When he sits besides him, he gets uncomfortable, you can see it on his face he doesn't want to sit beside a stranger. He wants to get up and change places. "What's with this guy? What does he want? Why is he so close?" Kuro notices this and looks at him. He saw him flinch (off camera because guy is covering him). Mick is scared of this guy.

Mickbell is a naturally untrusty person because of his backstory. He gets uncomfortable when new people starts acting friends because "well that can't mean good, can it?" Kuro knows this because they share a life together and proceeds to try and calm him the best he can in this situation.

Kuro puts his hands on Mick's back. He already has them there when the camera changes angles. "I got you. I'm here. Nothing is going to happen to you. Calm down." Mick now looks confused at the guy, but it's still clear he's very uncomfortable there. He leans towards Kuro a bit "I feel safer by your side and this guy is wierd".

In seconds, as soon as he sees him grab food from their table, he changes his mood. He jumps in surprise at the audacity. He's now annoyed and pissed. That's their food! How dares he... But he isn't the one to say anything, and from this alone you could tell he's quite introverted outside of their friends group (or that he didn't pay for the food idk). Kuro keeps his hands in there, knowing he's nervous.

Mick just looks at him eat, annoyed, maybe angry, and silent. He isn't probably paying any mind to what this guy is saying. He is stealing food. He should go get food somewhere else. Kuro seems to think something alike, but he is a bit surprised this guy has the balls to steal food so openly (he isn't paying atention either ot he doesn't understand)

He thinks a lot of thinks but says none, eating in silence. Kuro is staring with no good intentions behind those eyes. Only murder. Food robber. Mick disturber. Deserves death.

[mettywiththenotes]

No cause I could talk forever about Tomura and Izuku's dynamic with each other...

Them first meeting at USJ. Izuku wondering wtf is up with this guy, and regarding Kurogiri as more dangerous at the time. Tomura wondering wth was up with this kid, but also noting how fast he was, how he said Smash like All Might did

Tomura's obsession over Izuku being someone who lost a fight in order to save his opponent's heart. Printing a photo of Izuku out, staring at it, trying to figure out why he pisses him off so much (it's because Izuku is not like the other heroes). The Mall Scene being Tomura holding Izuku hostage just to vent about Stain, meeting by chance being "fate or destiny". Izuku actually being honest instead of saying something else that maybe could have freed him (the guts on this kid I swear)

Izuku remembering what Tomura said about "smiling wide as if to say there's no one he can't save", remembering it because Kouta started hating society, and in the next scene relating Kouta's anger to his own struggles with quirklessness, effectively tying all 3 of them together with the connection being the struggle with rejection and pain society gave them

The Mall Scene being the very first instance where Tomura was triggered by memories of his past, something that was so blurry to him until that point, and then the memories fully coming back in MVA. Tomura thinking almost the exact same thing Izuku thought when he was a kid ("What I really wanted/needed you to say was...") which draws them together again

The back and forth between the both of them in the war arc. "I'll send you to heaven!" and why tf did he say heaven instead of hell. The LOOK shown between each of them when AFO possessed Tomura. And of course "I'll never forgive you!" "And I won't forgive anyone."

Izuku going to the void and seeing Tomura being choked and strangled and struggling to move and then seeing Tenko crying in his garden and the LOOK he gave Tomura when he saw that. The way Tomura said it's his body, it's his dream, to AFO but looked directly at Izuku when he said it. Izuku "raging for the sake of others", the concerned expression on his face and then leaping to push back against AFO's will, leaping towards Tomura to do SOMETHING

Afterwards, when Izuku watched Tomura fall and thought "Please don't get back up", not just because of the amount of destruction Tomura could cause now that Izuku couldn't move anymore, but maybe also because he saw that Tomura was hurting and in pain and he saw Tenko crying and maybe he wished not to cause him anymore harm if he could help it

Izuku trying to catch up to the Noumus and TomurAFO, yelling at AFO to shut up, falling from the Noumus and holding his hand out as if to reach for Tomura but failing to do so. The panel looking as if Tomura was also holding his hand out to reach for Izuku, though it's probably not what was meant

"You looked like someone who needed saving" tying back to Bakugou's sludge incident, to Izuku running in to save someone who bullied him, to Izuku who is the same person who would lose a fight just to save his opponent's heart, to Izuku who has always been like this, and the text itself being shown over a panel of utter destruction in the city and the area, yet Izuku refuses to let Tomura just drown in pain

Tomura crying out for help deep down from the beginning of the story and then saying he doesn't care anymore, that the heroes can't understand anyway, and basically resolving to just destroy everything for real. Ironically, Izuku at the end of this arc realizing that Tomura needs help, listening to him and resolving to save him as TomurAFO flies away

Izuku putting his foot down in the void and telling the vestiges he wants to save that crying child. He wants to save him, even if the future is uncertain, even if it comes down to it and he has to kill Tomura (and he doesn't know what he'll do if that time comes), he still wants to TRY. Gran Torino gifting his cape because it will remind him that "killing is a way of saving too" and Izuku giving him that look like he doesn't want to say anything to refute the gesture of being given a gift from his mentor's mentor, especially on what could have been his death bed, but also like he doesn't like the idea of killing to save when it hasn't gotten to a point of no return yet

Izuku being no thoughts head empty about Tomura the entire Rogue Arc. Once again thinking about Kouta with Tomura because of the way that Kouta, who was so angry and the world and society, was able to come back from that and be saved. How Izuku previously unintentionally tied all 3 of them together, and how now he implies that if Kouta can be saved, so could Tomura

When Izuku fought Lady Nagant and admitted that, yeah, maybe he was ignorant before but now he knows that it's all a lot more complicated, that the world isn't as black and white as society made them think, it's actually more grey and "a blend of anxiety and anger", and that's why he has to reach out and help people even more, and how he was thinking about Tomura in the war arc crying out for someone to hear him

Tomura's head being so scrambled during the S&S battle because of AFO's possession to the point that he's not even sure who he is. But all the same, S&S tells them "someone with a will of heroism will take you down" and Tomura immediately thinks of Izuku. Despite how he told everyone he didn't care if they understood anymore, it's not the truth. He still wants to be saved, he still wants someone to care and help, and the first person he thinks of in relation to that is Izuku

Tomura's eyes lighting up in the final war arc UA battle when Izuku finally appears. Tenko trying to reach out and run away from AFO and being pulled back. Izuku asking first and foremost if Tomura is still in there, and then the confirmation that he is

Izuku punching a hole through Tomura's body, this being the thing that allows Tomura to shed his skin and regain control of his body. Tomura just kind of smiling at him and saying "What would you want to do if I told you I'm here? Sit down for a chat at the mall? Not happening, hero. After all, I AM your villain.", the recognition of the mention of the mall being confirmation that this is Tomura's personality and therefore he isn't gone

Izuku pushing him off floating UA so he doesn't decay it and everyone else on there, Tomura saying the only thing that will save him is destroying everything that has to do with that house, "That will be my only salvation, hero" (Izuku remembering this later on) and Izuku responding "I can't let you do that but I won't pretend I didn't see you crying"

The constant single pages every other chapter or so of these two fighting. Tomura watching Izuku's reaction to All Might's "death" instead of watching himself. That little moment of "You know Bakugou won't make it in time, right? It's all over" as they both watch Bakugou fly through the air, then the shock when he saves him

Making it to Mount Fuji. Tomura so desperate to make it clear that he's the villain, he's the one who is too far gone, to leave him alone because he doesn't need saving it's too late for that, and Izuku putting his foot down AGAIN and telling Tomura unabashedly "You are human."

Izuku using Black Whip inside his body to move because he can't anymore and Tomura saying "Looking at you, I'd never guess you were a hero", a parallel to when someone said that about Izuku in the Rogue arc

Tomura thinking about how any normal person would have prioritized their life over someone else's, how Izuku isn't normal, like he's entirely different from every other hero in Tomura's view who just wants to take him down and ignore his cries. This being the thing that attracted him to Izuku because Izuku is the kind of person who will take others even his opponent into consideration, and scratching at his neck after ages of not doing so. The battle is stressing him out and Izuku is hitting him where it hurts, this being evidenced again when Tomura proceeds to frown throughout the next scene because, again, Izuku is doing everything in his power to get an advantage just to help him

Tomura decaying Gran Torino's cape, as worn as it was, and this showing that the "killing to save" ideology simply doesn't apply anymore, not with how determined Izuku is to save him now more than ever

And now they are watching each other's memories... how they view the other from each other's pov's... delving into backstories and trauma...

Literally they have so much going on, so much symbolism and meaning in their interactions and how they see each other, and they've only interacted canonically 3 times throughout the story. That's not even to mention the stuff outside the story

Like volume 25's obi sketch and both of them being on the front cover AND back cover. The 306 double spread with AFO in Izuku's TV and All Might in Tomura's and Tomura looking at Izuku. The volume cover 15 25 35 pattern with Izuku on volume 15, Tomura on volume 25 and then both of them being on volume 35 (the implication that not only did Hori like the wsj version of that cover so much that he put it on this one, but also that there was no appearance of Izuku or Tomura in this vol35, suggesting that the only reason they are on the cover in the first place specifically is because it completes the pattern). Both of them appearing on volume covers at least 4 times that I can remembers (volume 3, volume 23, volume 10 and volume 35). And then there's the official art and sketches, like the jump festa sketches and that one sketch where Tomura and Izuku cosplay horror characters and show up to 1a filming studio ghibli my neighbor totoro, more like gatecrash with the way Bakugou yells to cut the scene

What the fuck. What the FUCK. I can't handle them *collapses*

[lookismaddict]

Lookism Chapter 434 Memes/Thoughts I Have:

(SPOILERS !!! I don’t own any of the Lookism panels and the translations. Only the memes that I made and the collages.)

OK, GONNA GO THROUGH THIS QUICK THIS TIME AND ONLY GONNA SHED LIGHT ON THE PARTS IN THIS CHAPTER THAT CAUGHT MY EYES. 👁👁

Last chapter was CRAZY MAN. WTHHHH

DAMN SHE EVEN HIT HIM WITH THE SMACK 😭😭😭

“GRANDMA CHILL! I SWEAR IMMA BRING YOU CLOTHES NEXT TIME-” 💀💀💀

Um… wtf? 😀

LOOK AT BABY BOY, USING HIS OWN ACTING SKILLS LIKE THAT. 😩😩💓💓💓 Or is he actually crying? Idk, can't tell. Oh, and “Grandma bullied me, mom.” 😐

HOW DOES SHE KNOW CHARLES CHOI??? MF A CELEBRITY AROUND THESE STREETS. Him and Jinyeong both bruv. 😭😭😭 (Also, “Too late mom. Already met him and he attempted to kill me too.” /j Charles Choi and Grandma would make a perfect couple. 😌✨)

Awww, is that baby Daniel? 😭 Also, wait a damn minute. Why does he look like...

I'M SORRY, BUT HE REMINDED ME OF THIS CHEEP CHEEP FROM MARIO KART. B R U H. THEY LOOK ALIKE. 😭😭😭😭

The typos on here. 😅 "Choio" DFJKDSAHFKLSHDSJLKF SORRY. The first time I was reading this, I had to reread because I thought I was crazy for a sec.

DANG, WE'VE BEEN GETTING A LOT OF NEW CHARACTERS WITH GLASSES RECENTLY. First that ONE HOT LADY from Tiger Job Center, then that ATTRACTIVE DOCTOR who was with Goo, and then NOW A POLICE OFFICER??? PTJ TRYING TO BRING OUT MORE GLASSES REPRESENTATION. 😩💘

UMMMM SIR??? YOU'RE GETTING SHITTED ON. LITERALLY!!!! 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

You guys wish you were that cow, huh...? 👀 Yeah, I see you. You can't fool me...

Woah, woah, woah, woah... RUN THAT BY ME REALY QUICK?!?! AYO, WHEN DID THIS TURN INTO A HORROR MOVIE? WHAT IS THIS, CHILDREN OF THE CORN? 1922???? 👁👁

Aw shit. Danny boy is gonna get gang.... (banged). SORRY. I CAN'T HELP IT-

OMG DANIEL. BEAT THEM UPPP!!!! 😤😤👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽

Dude. Why did I think this was Zack Lee for a second? 😳😳 (Zack and Gun if they had a child together LMFAO) ALSO THIS NEW GUY IS HOT AF. WHO IS HEEEEEE??? 😩🔥🔥🔥 (And we haven't gotten any naked scenes ever since Samuel, so is PTJ giving us some fan service since Samuel can't do the job right now...? 👀)

WTH IS HE IN A TUB FULL OF SNAKES? N A K E D ? 😳 I mean... if he's into getting his thing bitten- 👀 NAH, NAH, NAH, IM KIDDING, I SWEAR. 😭😭😭😭

I don't blame you if you stared at him for more than a minute.

Omg Daniel embodying his 😵 phase. BUT FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKK. THIS MAN IS BACK!!!!! HE'S FUCKING BACCCKKKKK. AEEEUUUUGGHHHHH. HE STILL LOOKS SEXY AF EVEN IF THIS IS JUST A FLASHBACK. 🥴🥴🥴🥴

YOU BET YOUR ASSES, I WILL SIMP OVER THIS MAN. H A R D.

*N S F W M E M E S W A R N I N G*

I DON'T WANNA SPIT, I WANNA GULP. I WANNA GAG, I WANNA CHOKE. I WANT YOU TO TOUCH THAT LIL' DANGLY THING THAT SWING IN THE BACK OF MY THROAT!!! 🥵🥵🥵🥵

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'M GETTING FLASHBACKS WHEN GUN HAD TO BEAT UP SAMUEL AND TELL HIM OFF. 😭😭😭😭

I can just imagine that horrifying face of his. Smiling so menacingly with those terrifying eyes. Like yessss king, go crazy!!! 😍😍😍

LOOK AT THESE DAREDEVILS. DAAAAAAAMN. TERRIFYING AS HELL. 🤭 DANNY BOY REALLY GOT IT FROM GUN FRFR. (Ugh, like father like son. Daniel could be my son- I mean, what? 😀)

I FUCKING KNEW IT. THIS FOUR EYED MF WAS SHADY FROM THE VERY BEGINNING!!! LIKE WHY TF WAS THAT CREEP STANDING THERE BEHIND HIM AND DANIEL, LOOKING LIKE ONE OF THEM PSYCHO NPC'S FROM OUTLAST 2 ????? BRUH GOT ME FUCKED UP. 😤😤😤

Ok, but why does this mf look like a DILF??? HE LOOKS LIKE A MIXTURE OF MANAGER KIM FROM HIS OWN WEBTOON AND ELITE WHEN HE WAS STILL YOUNG. LMFAAOOOOOO (I'm deadass ab this. They're attractive ngl.) AND WHY DO THE VILLAINS LOOK HOT AF? I'M NOT AGAINST IT, BUT I FEEL LIKE PTJ IS INTO SEXY VILLAINS. HE HAS A KINK FOR THEM. AND HE B R E A T H E S THEM. IN AND OUT. 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 (Update: I guess Kwak Jichang LITERALLY IS a piece of shit. Think about it… 💩)

ANYWAYS, we finna see who these Chungcheon mf's are next chapter. Hopefully, we get to know what the deal is with these people hating on Jinyeong. Bc I STG, IF THIS DRAGS OUT FOR THE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS, I’M GONNA LOSE IT. 😠😤👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽👊🏽

[emissaire]

the parting gift - ryuguji ken x reader

warnings/includes: angst, hurt/no comfort, toxic relationships, breaking up, violence, use of mature language such as swearing, mentions of izana x reader, implied dating bajitrio, senju and yuzuha are girlfriends bcs why tf not 🌈 // wc: 7.6K

listen to: m. by anıl emre daldal, romatic homicide by d4vd, chamber of reflection by mac demarco, chilly by niki

note: hey guys! happy new year ♥ here's my first angst for this year, 2023. hope you enjoy >< also this piece is inspired by the movies: the breakup playlist & the effect of a finger flick on a breakup

synopsis: that moment, it occurred to ken ryuguji that emptiness will be his companion for a very long time, so it seems, but it's fine. at the very least, you still gave him one last gift.

Life wasn't always like thisㅡ when you have to constantly second guess your own intentions and be self-deprecating. Life wasn't always filled with the unknown where you have to keep your head low and walk on eggshells so you wouldn't overstep but because of Ken Ryuguji, your every waking day is filled with uncertainty and anxiety. Even after you moved cities, the memories still haunt you.

You swear you used to know him so well like the back of your hand, memorized him to the very core so it's really ironic how you're looking at him as if he was someone you've only met once: familiar yet empty and distant. 

You can't see him anymore. Looking right through this unapologetic and hollow shell of a man that stood before you is like looking at yourself through a fragmented glass panel, reflective but damaged. You see yourself in him and it's so cruel because god damn, you want to resent him so much.

"Really, we broke up and that's fine. I have nothing against you." He shrugs so casually as if he is not seeing you crumble before himㅡ yet again. He looks too relaxed for you to be hurting this much just by hearing him speak his cursed poem of nonchalance and ignorance. It seems like he doesn't really care. Did he ever even care?

How did everything spiral down to this? Were you too complacent? Have you always been such a pushover? Do all these questions matter at this point?

You remember a time when his I love yous remind you of the tender moments with him, when the look in his eyes, as soon as they landed on you, was enough to placate you after a long day without him. Now they all mean nothing. He was your everything until it came to a point where the little things, small banters and meaningless quips turned into full-blown fights over who's right, who's in the wrong, who's the bigger person and who's better.

To this day, you still can't place a finger as to why that argument even came up. Not like you were ever in a rivalry with your own boyfriend. After all, a loving relationship is never supposed to be a competition but that wasn't how Draken saw it.

"I have… I needㅡ please, just cater me for a second." Your smile doesn't reach your eyes, sight starting to get blurry with the onslaught tears threatening to spill.

He doesn't say anything but the sound of his heavy sigh resounds in your ears so hauntingly but you push throughㅡ from all those years letting him overshadow your presence in what's supposed to be a two-way relationship, you think you deserve to be heard at least once. "I've been thinking… you know, I did love you."

"Are you trying to make me feel better? I told you, we're cool. You really don't have to." His words followed by a light chuckle manages to make your heart clench.

"No, I… I did, though I don't know when I stopped caring," you pause, clutching your bag placed on your lap before continuing, "Yesterday while I was unpacking, I found this." You used the opportunity to breathe as you dug through your bag to search for the item you found in your jewelry box. The anklet he had given you on your second anniversary is as pretty as ever when you hand it to him. "I just want to give that back."

Draken purses his lips and ends up pocketing the jewelry. He feels a little bad, seeing you so closed off again and looking small but this whole ordeal is a drag and pointless, he thinks. Why dwell on something that's already ended? 

"Can I ask you something?" Your voice stops his train of thoughts as he trails his eyes towards your face before he nods. "Did you really love me?"

The question got him taken aback but he had seen this coming. He knew it'll be a question after everything that's happened. "I did."

He sees your momentary pause, the look of surprise on your face baffles him as he narrows his eyes at you. Did you expect him to say no? He wasn't that bad, right? 

"Oh," was all you could muster to respond as you pondered over the remaining moments you were together.

"Were you expecting a different answer and for me to say no?" He didn't mean to sound accusing but the thought of you doubting his feelings hurt his pride.

"Can you blame me?"

"What are you implying?"

"Did you ever let me decide on dates? Have you ever asked me how my day went? You never even offered me your hand whenever we went out and it's so crowded." This time, your tears have practically cascaded down your cheeks as you ask him all the questions you've been bottling up. This was far from what you wanted to happen today. You promised to yourself not to open the wound you're trying so hard to heal but it happened before you could process it. As your voice raises in pitch, the more it wavers. It's pathetic but fuck it, you deserve at least this much.

"How is that important? You're so hung up on the littlest things." Draken argues back.

Little things, but wasn't it always the little things that matter? If he wouldn't listen because of that then you'll give him big enough reasons for him to hear you. "Have you approached me to apologize after an argument when you know you started it? Did you ever try to give something up for me? Whenever I wanted to see you, did you ever run to me?"

"Of course I didㅡ" "You did only because you wanted to have sex!"

That had him quiet in guilt, stiffening in his posture and lips going back to being pursed. So he really was that bad. No, maybe the term 'bad' doesn't even suffice to the amount of pain he's subjected you to. 

"Above all things, what kind of boyfriend would envy the woman they love? Ken, I wasn't your rival, I was your girlfriend. Weren't we supposed to be happy for each other? If you really loved me you wouldn't see me that way."

Draken has been quiet for a while now, not only tonight but has been for a couple of days. He's also been irritable so you try to do your best to show you're there for him but still keep a safe distance lest he needs his own space.

"Tora's new touch-ups on his bike were really cool, don't you think so?" You smile up at him, engaging his reaction but you're only met with silence and a frown as he hands you your helmet. The rest of his friends are still inside the restobar but your boyfriend insisted you guys leave first.

"Kenny?" This time, you touch his arm gently only for it to be shrugged off as he puts on his own helmet.

"You want to switch boyfriends since you think his bike looks cool? Go on then." His words were muffled but they were sharp and pointed that it digs through your heart. He's never one to be jealous, always the rational he is so you don't understand where this sudden idea came from.

You laugh, deciding to take his words lightly as you hop on the bike behind him, arms wrapped around his middle torso in a snuggle. "You know what I mean! I'm just happy for him since it took him years to have his dream bike."

 "You're so happy for him, you're not even his friend." The rest of the drive, you remain in silence. His words stung but what he uttered next as soon as the both of you are in yourㅡ no, hisㅡ apartment (as what he have told you last week in an argument: the apartment is his because he bought it, you doing the house chores and paying half the utility bills is a responsibility as his "tenant") did it. He said them with so much conviction you're convinced you owe him everything that you haveㅡ that you are.

"I– I loved you!" Draken claims, his own voice starting to waver as the realization hits him little by little. By the tone of his voice, it sounded like he was convincing himself more than you.

"I introduced you to my friends, right? I got you people who tolerate you! Without me you'd be nothing. I just want a little respect! Do you know how hard it was for me to have your family's approval? They all think you're better than me. I worked for so many years to have at least a pinch of regards but you? You didn't even have to do anything to make my friends respect youㅡ hell, they respect you more than me! I love you so much but looking at you and being with you just reminds me of how I'll always be a failure."

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Certainly, he knows he did. He cherished you once upon a time but the pressure of constantly comparing himself to you got the best of him. For him, no matter what he does he's always met with a scorn by your family while you, even your bare minimum actions are rewarded by praise from his friends. Right from the start, he knew you were too good for him but that never fazed him. When it finally poisoned his mind, he got so scared of you thinking the same way and without seeing how his actions affected you, he pushed you away and started blaming you for what he's lacking. 

"You're not supposed to hurt the one you love, Ken." You mutter, wiping the tears that wet your cheeks as you compose yourself. He doesn't say anything anymore but you can see his face scrunched upㅡ in hurt or confusion, you don't bother asking him as you take a step back. You've said what you needed him to hear, poured out the last bits of toxin tampering with your entire being and the root of all your insecurities.

This time, you will put yourself first above all things. You won't stop again for a person who's not willing to compromise and match their pace with you. "I hope this teaches us both something. Have a good life Draken."

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

"Man, you really need to get your shit together." Mikey's voice is muffled by the glass pressed against his lips as he takes a sip of his whiskey.

"What happened this time?" Mitsuya asks, eyeing the both of them over the kitchen counter.

After you left, Draken immediately called his closest friends for a drink. He feels so pathetic for feeling this wayㅡ for being hurt once you turned your back on him because he thought, after the official breakup that had happened a month ago, he would be okay. Why is he suddenly devastated when he knows he's not in any place to be?

"I'm such a horrible person." He says in a drawl, words slurring as he started drinking before his friends had even arrived in his apartment.

"Oh so you are aware." His blonde friend is about to add more insult but Mitsuya glares in his direction, wordlessly telling him to shut up.

"Why do you say that?" Mitsuya asks again.

"When you love someone you're supposed to make them happy. You'll do everything in your power so they wouldn't get hurt… but I–" He couldn't finish his words, getting choked up with the emotions flooding his system. "I fucked up so bad."

Both of his friends don't say anything, letting him speak his entire heart out. They've seen him put a barrier between you and himself and while they don't support the way he had treated you, it wasn't also their place to intervene. They could only offer so much because at the end of the day, the answer will always come from the both of you. So for the entire night, they stayed with Draken and listened to him ramble about how much of an asshole he is for hurting the only person who showed him genuine love.

The next morning, Draken woke up in his bed, throat dry and head spinning due to the hangover.  Last night was a blur, he can't even remember how much he drank and when his friends left his house. Feeling so weak, he almost didn't want to move but figured he'll feel much better after a shower and a glass of water. The anklet in his pocket is long forgotten as it fell on the floor and got kicked under his bed with no regard— much like how he had made you feel.

"Are you sure about this?" Your cousin, Hinata, asks almost tearfully. She's holding your unoccupied hand as the other carries your duffle bag. Behind the both of you are Naoto and Takemichi, rolling your luggages across the tiled floors of the airport.

So much has happened over the course of one year and while you can't say you're entirely happy, you've made it past the horrible times of crying yourself to sleep or skipping meals— you did everything you could to divert the pain away from your heart. It took that much to start building yourself up and all over again, and now you're here, in the airport ready to leave the country and possibly the hurtful memories you have too.

"Of course. I'll still call you guys whenever I can so we won't miss out much on each other." You reassure Hinata with a grateful smile on your face once all of you have arrived in front of the airport's gates.

You look over at your younger cousin, flashing him another smile and a nod towards Takemichi, wordlessly thanking them. You couldn't be more grateful for the support they've given you after the heartbreak. They were at your beck and call— especially Hinata when you needed a pillar and a shoulder to cry on so to leave them after everything makes you sad.

"You're going to be late if you stay here longer." Naoto reminds you, helping arrange your luggages in a way that will be easier for you to carry. 

You leave them after a round of hugs and tearful farewells and then you are off to another country, hopeful and confident that you'll find the very much longed for rest of your heart and mind.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Draken is… well, still an empty hollow man but unlike before when he liked to pretend he was fine just being him, he's doing terrible. His routine of beating himself up in the morning and drinking until the late hours of the night is a habit of his now, leaving Inui to manage the shop on his own. The man is too kind for his own good to even scold his business partner for neglecting his duties.

On some nights when he's really drunk, he cries and aches alone, calling out your name. He can barely even remember what it's like to long for you in sobriety as he drowns himself in liquor. He's eyeing the anklet he had given you again, he found it one morning when he stumbled on his own feet and kissed the floorboards of his room like a loser.

He tried to reach out a week after your confrontation but your cousins and even Takemichi kept blocking him out and any sort of contact he could get from you. He thinks he deserved that but the feeling of unfairness still eats at his heart and when it bleeds, the bitterness spreads. That's when he would turn to his only loyal companion now: alcohol.

"You need to stop doing this, Ken. You need help." Mitsuya tells him with his brows furrowed in concern.

"Stop fuckin' telling me whatta do, a'ight? I'll stop if she comes back!" Draken replies drunkenly, swinging the half-empty can of alcohol in his hand which only makes his friend sigh at the pathetic sight.

"Do you think she'll want to come back after seeing you in this state?" Mitsuya is indignant, snatching the can out of Draken's grasp only for the other to push him away defensively, almost knocking him back.

"You asshole! The hell's your problem?" Draken yells, fisting his shirt and glaring at him through unfocused eyes.

Mitsuya can only stare at his friend like he had grown two heads, befuddled and hurt. Draken has never been violent like this. "Ken, you're the one who has a problem."

His comment causes the taller man to go stiff and before they can even process what happened, Draken's fist connects to his cheek, leaving it bruised and sore. Despite the shock, he shoves the other back, aiming to punch him back but quickly stops himself in the process, seeing the empty look in his friend's eyes.

Mitsuya shakes his head as if to clear his own mind, heaving in adrenaline and anger. "Pull your head out of your ass and fix your shit. You're a fucking grown man so act like it." Without wasting another second, he storms out the apartment, shaking and anguished.

In a span of one year Ken Ryuuguji severs another relationship with his miscalculated judgment. 

"Oh my god! I missed you so much!" Hinata screams in excitement, hugging you as soon as she opens the front door to reveal you. It had been too long since you've seen each other and your cousin was over the moon when you told her you were coming home for her wedding. 

Life in Canada was both fulfilling and sad at the same time. You constantly miss the familiarity and your life in Japan but getting to explore, meet new people and discover new things about yourself were enough motivation to keep you grounded. You enjoyed yourself and you're as happy as you can get.

"Hina, please don't jump around too much. It's bad for the baby." Takemichi scratches his head, eyeing his fiancée in worry as he helps you carry your things inside their house.

"Oh please, I'm not even halfway through the second trimester. Stop being a worry-wart." Hinata teases the man as she leads you to the living room where she sits you down beside her. "So what was it like in a foreign country? Did you meet a handsome man?" She wiggles her brows teasingly.

You chuckle at her antics. "No, Hina and I did great there, considering I was alone."

"Heeey! You're omitting out one big detail. What happened to Mr. Hot Cafe Owner?"

She's talking about the man you met in Canada. He lived in the same apartment as you did, you were next door neighbors and he helped you with unpacking, even offered you dinner that same night. You hit it off well, considering he's an intellect with a golden heart. It even helped that he was part Japanese so you were less lonely and had someone to bond over missing home.

"Ahh him. He had to move back here in Tokyo for work purposes. Long distance didn't really work for us so we broke it off after almost a year of dating. It's been five months since we've had any contact." You shrugged. 

"That's a shame," she pouts, "Well you're here in Tokyo now… so why not give it a shot again? That's if he's still here and single?"

"Here are your drinks, ladies." Takemichi places a tray containing tall glasses of orange juice and you quickly grab the opportunity to ponder as you drink. 

You're not gonna lie, Izana (Mr. Hot Cafe Owner's name), was a great guy but there's something still quite missing in your heart so it was a blessing in disguise when he broke up with you himself. You agreed with his decision, thinking it would be for the best because up until now, you can still see yourself as someone else's woman no matter how ridiculous that sounds.

"Well, anyway! The wedding is in two weeks so we have a lot to do but for now why don't you go and rest first? Honey, can you please bring her to her room? I'm feeling tired." Hinata yawns, her hand on her belly as Takemichi nods right after placing a kiss on her forehead.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

Being back in Japan is overwhelming in a lot of ways but more than that, you're just relieved because after so long, you're finally home. Although quite tired still from the long trip, you can feel your nerves buzzing in excitement at the prospect of seeing what's changed here and what Japan has in store for you even if it's temporary. 

Days pass by in a blur with your cousins taking you around the city and back to the places you used to frequent; most times though you're with the couple helping them with last minute wedding preparations so you're pretty occupied which you're grateful for. If you weren't, you would have just spent your days thinking about him and the what-ifs, and you don't want that to happen after the years he's been out of your life. For all you know he could be married and even have kids— if you notice your heart squeezing at the thought, you ignore it.

"Thank you so much for all your help. I bet it was stressful for you, huh?" Hinata is adorned with the prettiest stud earrings, her hair and make up done in a way that accentuates her soft beauty. She's looking at you through teary eyes and a pout.

You quickly rush by her side, a warm smile on your face as you dab a tissue under her eyes lightly. Her baby bump is even more prominent with the snug fit of her dress which makes her look even more ethereal in her wedding attire. "No, thank you for trusting me to help out."

"Is the bride ready?" The wedding coordinator asks from behind the ajar door, looking at you and Hinata.

You flash a grin towards your cousin's way before turning to the coordinator. "Yeah, she is."

As the wedding procession happens, you stay close to Hinata as her maid of honor. You're like a worker bee assisting the bride, making sure that everything is fine that you don't notice the presence of someone who still holds a part of your heart captive and a pair of heavy eyes watching you from the crowd.

"Why didn't you tell me she's here?" Draken hisses beside Mikey as they stand at the front as Takemichi's groomsmen along with the others.

"I honestly didn't know." The other shrugs in nonchalance, completely engrossed in the wedding and finding entertainment at how Takemichi keeps stuttering. "Even if she is here, so what? She's Hinata's cousin so it makes sense."

"Liar. If I had known—" Draken's murmur is interrupted by Mikey's low voice, "It's not that big of a deal, Ken-chin. Besides, haven't you moved on? You're dating someone else now anyway."

That made him quiet, lips pressed into a thin line before heaving out a defeated sigh.

Four long years it has been and you still look… the same. You still look like you but somehow you look radiant? No, you've always been shining but in the years of having you hide behind his shadow, he wasn't able to see just how bright you were— for him you're a sight for sore eyes, something only to behold from afar.

The entire time until the end of the wedding and at reception, he doesn't ever take his eyes off you. Whether you spotted him after gawking at you like an idiot for hours and ignored him or you simply just not noticed, he's glad because if you look in his way, he wouldn't know what to do with himself. He could kiss you, cry, curse at you— he really doesn't know.

"Draken, Yona just texted me asking why you're not returning her calls. She said she's been calling you." Mitsuya lets his taller friend know, gesturing for his phone currently facing down the table. He and Draken made up, Mitsuya forgiving the latter with no hesitance seeing as they go way back and after promising to take care of himself and seek therapy to help him.

"I turned off my cell." Is his lame excuse.

"You should at least text her, let her know what's going on." Chifuyu adds while halfway through his food.

Yona isn't his girlfriend per se, more of like a person to fill the absence of the person he's been longing for. Though he finds her kind of irritating, she's sweet and wants to be with him despite the constant rejection so he keeps her around.

Draken only nods his head before excusing himself to go call the girl outside the reception hall. He doesn't know why he's feeling annoyed that he has to let her know of his whereabouts like he's a child. When he was with you, you trusted him and never pestered him to update you as long as you knew where he was and he got home safe— where the hell is mind going?

"Baby! Why are you only calling me now? I even texted you multiple times!" He winces at the whiny voice on the other line before sighing.

"Sorry, I turned my phone off. Didn't want to come off rude to the newly weds," he words out off-handedly, eyes staring into the spacious garden area of the reception, "Anyway, what's up? Did something happen?"

"I just miss you, that's all." Yona whispers, he can hear the suggestive drawl in her tone which has him frowning.

"Really? You called me because of that?"

"You're so mean. Y'know, my ex boyfriends would've been running to see me the moment I—" Draken doesn't hear her meaningless taunts to make him jealous because as soon as your figure emerges from the double doors where he had come from as well, his heart starts hammering in his chest. 

"Look, I'll call you back later." He drops the call without any hesitation as he mindlessly walks in your direction. There's really no thought in his mind, body working on autopilot when his eyes zero in on you. He's desperate when he opens his mouth to call for you but gets stopped by a strong grip placed on his shoulder.

"Don't." Naoto tells him, eyes dark in warning.

"I just need to—"

Your cousin frowns at him, clearly showing his distaste with no hesitation towards the latter. "Need what? To hurt her again? Don't you think she's had enough of you and your bullshit?"

The taller shrugs the hand off his shoulder, jaw slack and eyes narrowed back at Naoto as they share an intense glaring showdown but he refuses to back down. He just needs to hear your voice or even see you look his way… anything! 

"Stay away from her, Ryuguji-san. If you have any respect left for her, you'll leave her alone." Then he's left alone outside the reception hall, gaping and frustrated at the abrupt exchange between him and Naoto. He knows it was a bad idea to approach you all of a sudden like nothing happened, like he didn't do anything wrong, like he hadn't broken you into pieces, but the sight of you just made his mind go blank. You completely erased his mind to emptiness and filled his heart full with so many emotions. 

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

You find yourself clutching your chest, locked up in the bathroom stall as you attempt to calm your heart down. You knew he was going to be there, his name written on the invitation and at first, it made you nervous but he's quickly removed from your thoughts with how busy you had been with your cousin's wedding. Right now though, you can barely contain it. You're surprised you managed throughout the wedding procession and made it to reception but now, you feel weak.

You're sure he knows you're here even though your name wasn't on the invitation, leaving it blank since they weren't sure if you'd be able to make it. He knows you're here but he acts like he's fine and you know he is— not even a bit fazed by your presence.

"Babe, you okay in there?" You hear Yuzuha's voice outside the stall.

"You've been here for 10 minutes. The couple's about to cut the cake." Emma notes though you don't miss the worry in her voice.

You breathe in and out, straightening your back and tucking the loose curls of your hair behind your ear before opening the door with a confident smile on your face. "I'm okay. Let's go?"

They both nod and then loop both of their arms through either one of yours, guiding you out of the comfort room. 

The entirety of the event, you don't dare look Draken's way nor even attempt to share the same space with him when you find him too close for comfort. You have to stay away from him if you don't want the years you spent trying to get used to his absence to be meaningless. 

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

A week after the wedding, both Hinata and Takemichi are away for their honeymoon. You have at least a month or so left before you need to go back to Canada and you're growing restless with nothing to do. You can't bother Naoto since he's busy with his job and you feel hesitant to ask both Emma and Yuzuha out since you didn't talk much when you were in Canada. You don't want to bombard them with sudden invitations because of the gap that has grown between you three.

"Fuck it." You sigh, deciding to call the girls anyway for a night out. Fortunately, they both said yes and you're determined to get out of the lonely house in your silk bodycon dress. You're waiting outside of the house for Yuzuha to pick you up so she can drive you both to Senju's house, her girlfriend, for pre-shots while Emma is already waiting at Senju's place. 

You clutch your purse and coat tighter when you see Yuzuha's 2007 Rolls Royce Phantom Drophead stop in front of you, a cheeky grin plastered on her face. "Get in, loser. We're going drinking!"

You laugh at her Mean Girls reference as you pull the door open to situate yourself on the passenger seat. Good thing that you have a coat with you, considering that she's driving with the roof of her convertible down, you're bound to get cold.

The conversation with Yuzuha managed to ease you down and relax until you arrived at Senju's. Emma is the first to greet you with a "Don't you look gorgeous!" She gushed as soon as she saw you, rushing towards you like she's not in her bedazzled 6-inch stiletto heels.

Behind her is Senju, chilling on the couch. "Hey!" She grins at you, presenting a bottle of booze in the air. "Ready for drinks?"

It's 9:30 after the girls decided it was finally time to get down to business and leave for the club. You, Emma and Senju are tipsy but still coherent enough while Yuzuha is completely sober, only drinking one or two shots so there's at least one responsible within your group. She's just hoping that none of you are rowdy when drunk.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

You're perspiring as you dance together with Emma, both of you swaying to the music with your arms around each other to fend off other people who might take it as an invitation when they see either of you dancing alone.

"I've forgotten what it's like to let loose after so long! I feel so free like this!" You shout beside Emma's ear so she can hear you.

Emma giggles, eyes slightly unfocused as she clutches your sides. "Good to know you're having fun though!"

You nod at her, beaming under the poor lighting of the club. Senju and Yuzuha are still at your table, watching you both as they drown in each other's presence. The both of you continued dancing for a while before Emma excused herself to the bathroom while you made a beeline towards the bar counter.

"Can I have water please?" You smile at the bartender after he nods at your request, quickly handing you a glass of cold water to cleanse your palette. "Thank you!"

The counter isn't that busy, only six of you are seated as everyone danced the night away so the bartender entertains you politely. "Are you having a fun night?"

Immediately, you bob your head yes. "Oh yeah. I'm with my girls so I'm definitely having a blast."

"That's great to hear. Sometimes I'd get the opposite answer so I'm relieved." He grins at you before eyeing the now empty glass in your hand. "So another glass of water or can I offer you something else?"

Before you can respond, a hand slides over the counter on your right, a card under its palm. The sudden voice makes you still in your seat, nerves buzzing as you turn to look at the stranger. "She'll have a red sangria."

The bartender raises a brow, skeptical before asking you, "Would you want that, Miss?"

Izana flashes you a boyish grin, his head tilted to the side and making his eyes twinkle as they trace your face in familiarity. He's waiting for your response, even cocking an eyebrow to urge you.

"Yeah, yeah that'd be nice." You hesitantly look back at the bartender to confirm your response with a slight nod of your head and a shaky smile. Without another word, the bartender works on your drink.

Your ex sits on the empty stool beside you, resting his head over his closed palm so he can admire you with a fond and cheeky smile present on his face. "How have you been? You're as pretty as ever."

Well shit.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

"Wait, you guys are here?" The loud voice sounds so indignant, making Senju and Yuzuha pull away from each other's lips, although quite hesitantly.

Squinting to be able to see more clearly, Senju frowns at the sight of his older brother and his friends gathered in front of their table. "Haru-nii, why are you here?"

"Can the both of you stop yelling?" Baji interrupts, pulling out a chair at the same table so he could sit, making Haruchiyo, Mikey, Draken, Mitsuya and Pah-chin to do the same. Their once empty and quiet table is now as rowdy (if not, more) as the other tables.

"You're just salty because your boyfriends left you out on their mini-vacation." Mikey snickers along with Haruchiyo and Pah-chin, annoying Baji at the mention of Chifuyu and Kazutora going on a cruise trip without him to punish him after forgetting to lock up the pet shop and almost losing two cats and three hamsters.

"Man, shut the hell up. I already apologized about it." Baji sounds so antagonized before downing an entire bottle of beer from the couple's bucket.

"Who're you with anyway?" This time, Draken asks as he looks around the club goers to spot any familiar faces and man, did he spot someone so intimately familiar. Is that really you with Mikey's fucking brother?

He doesn't hear Yuzuha's answer as he watches you giggle at whatever the silver head man just told you. He chuckles in disdain, scorning even more when Izana ruffles your hair and pinches your cheek as if you two were close. When did you even meet this guy?

"Why are all these people here?" Emma's voice stops his train of thoughts, she's looking at them with faux annoyance before plopping down on the seat next to her brother.

"Eh, I should be the one asking you that. You said you'd be at Shin-nii's place to help him with his date!" Mikey probes, flicking his sister on the forehead.

"Obviously I lied and you did too. You said you'd be with grandpa tonight!" The siblings continue to bicker while Draken remains mum in his seat, watching you and the nuisance beside you.

"Oh shit! Is that Izana?" Mitsuya asks, bewildered as he points towards your direction. "With—"

"Yeah, the four of us came here. I didn't know Izana-nii was back though…" Emma pouts. "He's even flirting with my friend! The jerk!"

"Should we call them over?" Pah-chin suggests.

Mitsuya and Mikey simultaneously look at Draken but the latter dismisses them. "Yeah, sure. Why not?"

Emma is a girl on a mission when she strides towards the unsuspecting figures of her victims. Placing a hand on your shoulder as well as Izana's, she leans between the both of you. "What is the meaning of this?"

You nearly jump out of your seat, if not for Emma holding you back with a cheeky grin. "You scared me!"

"Sorry!" She chirps before turning her attention towards the man beside her now, eyes squinted. "And you meanie! You didn't inform us you were back and then you're flirting with my girl?"

Her words seem to confuse you. She sounds very familiar with Izana so you look at the both of them in silence, watching their interaction.

Izana rubs the back of his neck with a sheepish grin. "Hey… little sis!"

Little sis?

Emma just clicks her tongue before wrapping her hands around your arm as well as Izana's and then tugging the both of you towards the table where the others are. You almost stumbled on your feet at the sight of Draken but relents anyway as Emma continued to drag you with her.

"Here they are! You sit with me Izana-nii, explain yourself!" Emma pushes you lightly towards the unoccupied seat which so happens to be near Draken.

Great. Just what you needed.

You clear your throat, easing the awkwardness out of your system and refusing to look to your right where he's situated. "Wait, how come you guys know Izana?" You ask, confusion still clearly written on your face.

Mikey groans, hitting the white haired man on the shoulder. "He's our brother. It's kind of a complicated story but yeah, we're siblings."

Isn't it so funny? The world's so small even the person you decided to date is somehow still connected to the person you're trying to forget. "Right, of course."

"The real question though is how you know each other?" Draken addresses, clearly showing interest but you don't dare turn his way or else you might just combust and freak out.

This time, both you and the man in question stare at each other for a moment before he clears his throat. "We uhh, we dated."

You can't see him but you definitely feel the ominous aura from the man behind you, for what reason, you're baffled but it's not like he cares, right? It's been years since you broke up.

"When was this?" Baji asks, completely intrigued.

"In Canada, we dated for a year at least." Izana clarifies with an easy shrug before sending a playful wink your way.

"Ew. Someone, pass me the sick bucket!" Mikey jokingly hurls while the rest laugh at his anticsㅡ except for Draken.

It's so pathetic how your attention is still on him despite the presence of your friends and your other past lover but the hold he had on you— still has on you is too strong for you to pretend that it's not there. 

"Come with me." Says Draken, a tight hand around your arm as he pulls you up to stand.

"What?" You ask in bewilderment, eyes wide and mouth gaping. Everyone around the table stares at the both of you now, making you want to shrink.

"Ken—" You shake your head towards Mitsuya as you finally stand as well and let Draken lead you away from the table. You quickly turn your head, mouthing an I'll be okay before completely disappearing out of their sight.

"What was that about?" Izana asks, completely perturbed by just what happened, aiming to follow you but Mikey pulls him back down.

"She said she'll be okay. They'll come back later."

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

The both of you are outside in the parking lot, awkwardly standing in front of each other though both your eyes don't dare to meet, too afraid to see what they might imply. In the years you've dated one another, spoken words didn't amount to how your eyes communicate.

"Why did you bring me out here?" You finally decide to address him, uncomfortably shivering in the chilly night. In your haste, you didn't get to bring your coat with you. Damn Draken.

"I…" The words in his throat get stuck as soon as he sees you— actually sees you in front of him. The way you have to tilt your head upwards to look at his face, your pretty lips in a small pout and your eyebrows furrowed, god, he wants to see your smile as much as he wants to see you cry.

"If you dragged me out here to fight, please spare me. I came here to have fun." You murmur, voice soft and timid as if you're afraid that you'll offend him. The years you spent building your confidence seem nothing now that you're facing the person behind your self-destruction.

"That's not— fuck. I miss you!" His longing words come out more aggressive than he had intended it to but you make him lose himself in the emotions swarming him.

It feels like a bucket of water has been splashed all over you as you take in his words, time seemingly slowing down agonizingly the longer you stare at him. "I don't have time for this." Yet you remain rooted in your place. For some reason, the way he's looking at you like you have half of his heart makes you want to stay and listen to what he's going to say next— like a fool. You know you shouldn't give him another opportunity to break your walls down yet here you are.

"I long for you every single day. I see you in everything around me— I… I still love you. So damn much." There, he said it. The one thing you've been wanting to hear since your relationship bursted at its seams… yet it doesn't do anything to lift the heavy feeling lodged in your chest. The elevation you expected to swarm you doesn't come and it's so disappointing because once upon a time, you needed him to say that.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Draken sounds so desperate and he knows it. He's almost ready to grovel at your feet if you so wish but he doesn't hear anything from you, it's like you're not there with him anymore. Absent, empty and void. He finds it so hard to breathe. "Please, say something. Say anything…please."

A heavy and shaky sigh is your response, biting at the quiver of your lower lip as if it would stop the impending hurt from overtaking. "If I say that I still do return your love, would it change anything? Answer me truthfully, Ken."

He's almost tempted to say yes but he knows the answer to that. He'd be fooling the both of you then because the remnants of what you had isn't really enough to fix what he's already destroyed.

You offer him a small smile but deep inside, you feel your insides twisting and your heart shrinking with what you're about to say. "We've grown older and apart, I'm sure you also had your own realizations as to what went wrong with us."

Draken nods his head in affirmation although his eyebrows are creased, finding it hard to read between the lines— is this acceptance or rejection?

"So I don't understand why you're saying all these things to me like you didn't learn anything from what happened," you purse your lips before adding, "I cherish what we had and I like how things are now. I choose to stay away from you because I don't want to keep putting all the blame on you. I don't want to end up hating you, Ken Ryuguji. Let's not do this."

He doesn't know what hurts more. The way you murmured his name with such tone, like there's a vast space between you— loud but meaningless because you're so far away or the fact that somehow, you still put him on a pedestal despite being an asshole to you. It's fucking with his mind and he wants to see the entire world burning with the lightmatch in his hand. After all, what's the world without you? What is he without you?

"Please keep your distance from me, Ken. I don't want to keep doing this. It's tiring." Such heavy words fall past your lips like they weigh nothing, but to Ken Ryuguji they were enough to break him. They were like knives piercing right through his very heart and as you take a step back and away from him, he doesn't follow you to ease the gaping hole it left in his chest as he watches you walk away again. This time, he's sure that you will never make the same mistake of turning back the wrong way— turning back to him because right there and then, he lets it happen. With a broken sob he's ever heard himself cry, he fully embraces the void as the last thing to remember you by. That moment, it occurred to him that emptiness will be his companion for a very long time, so it seems, but it's fine. At the very least, you still gave him one last gift.

@emissaire 2022 all rights reserved - plagiarism is a crime

[tired-reader-writer]

If somebody brandished me in front of their entire household like that I'd die from sheer embarrassment.

Maybe it's because I know what's coming, I can't help but feel the grip of dread coiling around me. There's technically nothing wrong with Shaghad in these panels, but I find myself wincing and bracing myself. Like, he's presumably close to his household staff, they're all smiling, Elam looks really happy for them, but I can't share their smile. I wonder how I would've felt towards these panels if I didn't know what would happen (by the time this chapter came around and I first read it I unfortunately already watched the anime and knew what was coming).

We don't see his face, his eyes. His smile is a bit too wide. He doesn't respond to what Narsus actually said. Shaghad's “Narsus!” was said a little too forcefully.

He must've heard what Arslan represents, as established in previous chapters the residents of Gilan know Arslan wants to abolish slavery.

Shaghad wants no part of it.

First hint in the scene that, uh-oh, things aren't gonna be smooth sailing for Narsus.

“You're saying humans need... fantasies to make life bearable." REALLY? AS IF IT WAS SOME KIND OF PINK PILL? NO. HUMANS NEED FANTASY TO BE HUMAN. TO BE THE PLACE WHERE THE FALLING ANGEL MEETS THE RISING APE. "Tooth fairies? Hogfathers? Little—" YES. AS PRACTICE. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES. "So we can believe the big ones?" YES. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING. "They're not the same at all!" YOU THINK SO? THEN TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET—Death waved a hand. AND YET YOU ACT AS IF THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME...SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED. "Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point—" MY POINT EXACTLY.

I know the quote is only so tangentially relevant if you tilt your head sideways and squint, but I couldn't resist.

Stories are important, y'all.

Elam must be feeling so terrible, seeing as he was once a slave too (and looks like these slaves aren't even being treated kindly to boot, and Shaghad dares to proclaim “there's nothing wrong w the system if the master is merciful!” when he himself is not even a merciful master...)

Shaghad is the type of person that, when someone says “it's not fair!”, laughs and smugly sneers at the person “the world's not fair, deal with it”. Or one of those dudebro types who mock emotions and stuff by saying “brooo that's all chemicals nothing you say is valid and nothing you feel is real”.

God I hate this guy.

I do wonder when/how he changed, though. How'd he go from being so close to Narsus, enough for the latter to trust him, to... this? Maybe the inferiority-resentment combo he felt made him veer off-course. He was always the “disreputable” type, so I guess his descent wasn't very difficult.

This panel is making me feel things. Narsus and Elam are so small, the gates of Shaghad's estate looming behind them. The way the shadow is positioned evokes the feeling that they're leaving darkness behind. Compared to the grand, warm welcome they received with servants lining the gate, there's no one to see them off when they depart. Ough.

The way the line “When even a love may wither with time, why expect more of friendship?” is positioned over a panel of ocean waves about to erase footprints (I think?). Arakawa is a genius.

Also, Narsus sounds so dad-like in this scene, and Elam... is not okay. I wonder what he's thinking.

Oughohohoho Farangis PRETTY

How tf did Pelagius not recognize her, is he blind?? And of course, I loved the part where she just. THROWS HIM. Woman's STRONK.

[audhd-nightwing]

percy jackson ep2 live reaction

annabeth being a little creep i love her

fun fact i learned at the pjo NYCC panel: the most grueling part of the show production was making the camp half-blood shirts. they all had to be a specific shade of orange and there had to be a LOT cuz all the campers wear them consistently

very much angsty tween energy

ITS SOOO PRETTYYYYYYYYYY

i love the big house’s design

grover’s little *clop clop clop* hehe

“your highness” book!percy wouldn’t be caught dead saying that shit but it’s still funny cuz i KNOW as soon as he learns more abt the gods all that respect is out the window. book!percy is just a little asshole from the start

Mr D is fucking perfect casting

godDAMN chiron is tall asf

also i fr did not know brunner was pronounced like that

mr d actually being kinda nice to grover??

ITS SO COOL I WANNA GO TO CAMP THERE

riptide my bbg

i need a close up of the inside and outside of all the cabins immediately

Hermes cabin 💪💪💪

there’s a fire pit IN the cabin?? that seems like a hazard. but also magic and it’s fucking cool so

the complete non-reaction to percy’s introduction now vs how people will eventually react to hearing his name is kinda wild

they really did not give this poor boy any time to grieve his mom huh

LUKE

poor percy, his first reaction to being approached is to be defensive :(

CHB necklace!!!!

o shit that scared me. hello wood nymph. is this his mom??? idk how satyrs are born

the tiger shirt 💀

LIKE AN OLD BANANA HGHDGDGDGD

grover :( ur a good friend bb

dream time woooooo. OH THE VOICE IS KRONOS i forgor

“glory” ok nerd

luke really has a whole posse following him around lmao

IS THAT THE LESBIAN FLAG ON CLARISSE’S NECKLACE???

nvm they all have them in that order….

i love that percy has just had that leather necklace from the very start of the show. in preparation for the camp beads :,)

aaaaaaaa a character in a wheelchair that’s so cool!!!!!

no one’s even gonna show him how to use the bow???

this boy is gonna destroy the camp i love him

BRO DID NOT GET THE JOKE AND I FEEL SO SEEN. YES THERES A GREEK GOD OF DISAPPOINTMENT

oh my god i’m gonna cry. percy praying to sally is my favorite change they made in the whole show

“like, real friends” crying luke how dare you betray this sweet darling boy

YOU TELL HIM PERCY!! get his ass

“hey guys! 😃 🤚 can’t sleep huh?” ilysm percy

“do you think you’re special?” oh boy clarisse do you have a big surprise coming. also percy didn’t even tell anyone abt the minotaur that was grover

okay i liked this cgi way better than nancy bobofit’s takedown

annabeth stalker behavior i love you. SHE ADMITS IT TOO I LOVE HERRRE

“annabeth sees the world differently” yeah she’s autistic with a genius iq

sobbing. “she’s my little sister”. pain. the betrayal is gonna hurt so much more

th-alia ??? hm

“until zeus broke the pact” hades, hiding his kids from the 1940s in the lotus hotel: yeah zeus was the one to break it first, obviously

i can’t wait to see who they cast as thalia

“let it rip” i see what you did there 👀 my mind went right to beyblade tho lol

their shields lowkey look like the nightwing symbol :3

SUNSHINE ADDSHFJFHDG

god this set is so fucking cool

cringefail loserboy rizz

THE HAT!!!!!!!!!!!

“he’ll be ready, i know it” *cuts to percy flossing* i love this dumbass so much

lizard :D

exceptional depiction of adhd ty rick

bro really just gave away the location of the flag with no hesitation lol

OH SHIT THAT WAS COOL! the roll into picking up the shield? smooth asf!!!

how tf did the spear even break isn’t it made of like magic metal

she really used him as bait lmao. *pushes him into the water* she’s just testing a hypothesis!!

holy shit the cabin is so cool. kinda spooky tho. i hate to say it but i like the movie version better

“what 😃”

damn they really just blame everything on hades huh. poor guy. i’d hate my siblings too if they gave me a shitty job and made me the scapegoat for a bunch of stuff

why tf is chiron wearing a suit. why.

“i’m sally jackson’s son” YES YOU ARE KING

grover you’re the best ily. chiron you’re giving way too much dumbledore energy i hate it

[dangerous-advantage]

throughout usagi yojimbo, there is this running theme of fatherhood, with usagi generally enjoying interactions with kids. if possible, he tends to seek them out (this is just as adorable as it sounds, btw)

as somebody who has long been iffy about the subject of kids/kid fics and media with a big focus on this, i'm surprised to find just how much i like sakai's exploration on the subject.

so, i've decided to delve into (a part of) why i think this works so well for me. for this, i'm focusing on UY issue #54: the return of the lone goat and kid.

(beware spoilers <3)

(caption: a cropped image of the cover of usagi yojimbo issue #54.)

within this issue, we witness the return of the lone goat and kid, betrayed samurai turned legendary assasin mercenary, with his young son, gorogoro.

i immediately liked these characters when first reading, not only because of the general badassery that they tend to exude, but also because they are very autistic-coded (/pos /lh), and gorogoro is depicted as non-verbal.

(note: he could be very young, but i'm fairly certain he just prefers not to talk, and saves his words for very specific occasions. either way, i love him a normal amount totally definitely /j.)

seeing their return was a welcome surprise, and though usagi and yagi are very autistic when interacting (/pos), usagi's soft-spot for kids plays a big part in their relationship, having saved gorogoro from falling to his death the last time they crossed paths.

even more welcome of a surprise was the plot and focus on gorogoro and usagi's relationship. i love to see usagi allowed to just... hang out with kids. you can tell he really enjoys doing it w/out the story putting a huge emphasis on that fact, which is part of why i enjoy it so much.

(the kid in question.)

now, to break this all down nice and simply, sakai's comics are generally so well done that i think you could just read the comic yourself and glean the same idea, probably in a better, more meaningful way than i can explain it.

but i've already committed, so here we go.

when we first meet gorogoro, he's being chased by a bunch of henchmen who intend to use him as bait for the capture of his father (being a very, very, very wanted man. er, goat.)

usagi stumbles upon him being threatened by one of the few other rabbits in this series and proceeds to suplex him after his hat is ruined. after that, we get the first good-parent-role-model-usagi moment:

(usagi participates in 10 out of 10 parenting/responsible adult behavior. to avoid writing this out ten million more times, i will simply be referring to this phenomenon as usagi being 'father material.')

he (re)introduced himself, puts himself in the (well-earned) position of "trustworthy adult" and then tries to figure out where tf yagi is. gorogoro, of course, does not speak, but instead of pushing him for an answer, he comes up with a conclusion and offers a solution.

usagi: "i guess you two have been seperated, huh. well, it's dangerous in these woods. there could be more of those guys around."

usagi: "there's a town not far away. your father will have an easier time finding you there."

he then invites gorogoro to come with him, saying he can escort him to the town. gorogoro seems unconvinced.

this might be the point where a lesser protagonist would try and convince/force the kid to come with them, or even manipulate them in some way (i.e. offering false promises/reassurances or just straight up lying.)

usagi, however, is not a lesser protagonist.

(several more panels of father material usagi content.)

quick side tangent: you could argue this is somewhat irresponsible, but i disagree.

usagi has met yagi and gorogoro before, and he knows that gorogoro is a smart kid. he doesn't have the full story for why gorogoro is here. for all he knows, gorogoro is on his way to meet up with his father somewhere farther on in the forest.

the point is: he doesn't try and make a decision for gorogoro or try and coax/force him into making one. he instead treats him like an equal and offers him the choice of whether to follow him or not.

when gorogoro doesn't seem to actively seek his help, he walks away, giving gorogoro full reins of his decision while also respecting an unspoken boundary that gorogoro has made.

(though, to be fair, he did assume gorogoro would follow him-- an assumption that paid off.)

("i see you decided to come along after all.")

what's important here isn't that his guess paid off, it's that he allowed gorogoro to make the decision. not to mention, he still hasn't quite figured out how to best work with gorogoro, as is showcased in the following panels:

(usagi participates in ableism /j /lh /not serious)

usagi is shown to be "good at kids." he gets along with them, and they tend to like him in turn. but that's not just an innate talent (though aptitude to kids does play a big part of it.)

he invests in positive relationships by treating children not as we often see/think of in parent-child or adult-child platonic relationships, but by treating them like equals. simply, he offers them the same respect he would offer anyone else.

which is so fucking important.

anyway, they get to the town and go to an inn inside, where usagi buys gorogoro food. once again, he exhibits king and father material attributes.

gorogoro doesn't look interested in eating the food. this is the exchange that follows:

and then:

(the 'king shit' in question)

now. let's break this down.

usagi offers food, but gorogoro is distrustful. he employs a tactic that may have worked on other children to try and convince/reassure gorogoro that eating it is fine. gorogoro is, in fact, unconvinced.

then, instead of getting irritated, or continuing to try and (unsuccessfully) convince gorogoro the food is convinced, he uses what he's observed about gorogoro/what he knows about gogoro's life to understand what he is actually saying.

he does not force him. he doesn't get annoyed. when he calls him 'weird,' it feels less like an insult and more like a neutral observation, one that he then uses to better work with/communicate with gorogoro.

('does [he] know kids or what,' indeed.)

in the space of two pages, usagi was able to figure out how to better work with gorogoro, not by changing gorogoro, but by changing his methods.

his outlook is not the one we see depicted in much of modern media-- "the parent is always right, and the child must do as they are told."

instead, it introduces a sense of respect, and therefore trust, into their dynamic. i thought i could only get something this good from roald dahl's matilda, but of course, i should've known to never doubt stan sakai /lh

this of course, isn't the end (but we are close!). a bunch of plot stuff happens, and in the search to reuinte gorogoro with his father, usagi ends up on a bridge, with enemies after gorogoro's head (and associated reward) flanking either side of it.

gorogoro, while still maintaining his distance/boundaries, shows that he trusts usagi by running behind him when threatened.

not only that, when usagi orders him to stay behind him (for reasons of protection,) he does so and continues to do so. because usagi has earned his trust, he feels comfortable entrusting usagi with his safety, where he was less comfortable doing so at the beginning.

(the bridge show-down, with the addition of usagi's killer clapback of a line. 10/10, i laughed.)

there's only one other moment i want to mention, but despite how small of a detail it is, it's what got me thinking about this whole thing.

after usagi realizes he's been flanked on either side and will need to fight his way out in order to keep gorogoro safe, this exchange happens:

one of the very first things usagi must have noticed is the silent boundary that gorogoro put up, one that he's been maintaining this entire time. he prefers space-- i.e., he would rather not be touched, at least not without permission.

in this scene, a lesser protagonist would have snatched gorogoro up by the arm, let loose some feral battle cry, and then rushed all seven henchmen using only one arm.

usagi is not a lesser protagonist.

he takes a moment, however small, to communicate his intentions to gorogoro. "i need to carry you" doubling as a silent question: can i carry you?

while he probably would have had to either way, usagi already built up trust between himself and gorogoro. so, gorogoro obliges.

and then usagi single-handedly (literally!) fights his way through seven guys.

ok, well, that's not quite true-- yagi, the 'lone goat' of the duo (more like G.O.A.T -- yes, i have been waiting for a time to make that godawful pun, and no, this is not an appropriate time, but i had to make it. you don't understand /j /nsrs) shows up on the other side pushing gorogoro's cart, and also contributes to the slaughter.

which leads to this epic, two-page panel:

(its so good ITS SO GOOD--)

after this, the story is wrapped up, the kid is returned to his goat, and usagi and the lone goat and kid go their separate ways (for now.)

as you can probably guess, this depiction of platonic child/adult relationships is very, very important to me, not only because i feel we need more of this in the general media, but also to me, specifically, as a member of the neurodivergent community.

seeing a character that i genuinely like respecting the unspoken boundaries of a nonverbal child character means a lot to me. whether he meant it to be interpreted this way or not, it really feels like we get to see an autistic character having different needs/wants and not being shamed for that by the narrative.

this is only one aspect of what makes usagi yojimbo so great, but it showcases some of the many details that sakai uses to create a well-paced, interesting, and engaging narrative.

gone are the annoying, one-dimensional kid characters and the terrible tropes that usually follow them. instead, sakai treats the children in his characters the same way that usagi treats them: as people, characters that have motivations and reasons and that deserve time and respect as well.

as i stated before, i have long shied away from kid-related stories, especially those with younger kids. but lemme tell you. UY has won me over.

i would happily pay away my livelihood to read 700 more panels with usagi toting around a 6-month-old while he talks about conspiracies with the town inspector (see: usagi yojimbo issue [blank]: [name]), or usagi letting the kid of the family he's staying with admire his blades [insert comic here.]

sakai just gets kids, and now when i'm faced with the question of: is this an example of positive parenting/guidance?, i just ask myself, "would usagi do that?"

and it answers my question.

bonus: usagi and yagi being absolutely not in any way incredibly autistic at each other during The Exchange.

(note: their smiles in that end panel make it all worth it, i think.)

[transformers-mosaic]

Transformers: Mosaic #538 - "Lament"

Originally posted on September 3rd, 2010

Story, Script, Letters - Seb Script - HdE Art - Roy Stiffey

deviantART | Seibertron | TFW2005 | BotTalk

wada sez: This Crosscut spotlight is absolutely the funniest Mosaic I've read in ages. On deviantART, Seb said: “Well, my dictionary defines 'soliloquy' as "the act of a character speaking to himself so as to reveal his thought to the audience" (whereas 'colloquy' would be a regular conversation between 2 parties). Technically, Crosscut doesn't 'speak' here, which makes this a 'monologue' instead of 'soliloquy', but since the piece is all about big words, the latter one sounds way more 'literate' ;p”. HdE added: “With LAST STAND OF THE WRECKERS, Roche and Roberts gave us the horrors of war, musings on insanity, sacrifice, betrayal and a huge helping of death and destruction. With LAMENT, Seb and HdE give their audience... big words. And waffle. Lots of waffle. Mmm... waffles... [...] Our intention here was to put Crosscut over as being far-too-verbose and serious for his own good. But hopefully, you can still feel a pang of pity for him at the end.” See below for a mirrored version of Seb’s full commentary for the strip, originally shared to his own deviantART account, along with clean colors and even an Italian translation.

Now to explain the not-so-pure motivation behind this piece, sigh.... :) Mainly, there are two reasons:

1) I was always amazed (not always positively) by how TF fandom takes pride in (sometimes even competitive) knowledge of insanely obscure trivia, situations and characters from within the franchise. In 25+ years, said franchise has accumulated an insane number of somethings than can, depending on the case in question, be labeled as a character, "character", pitiful excuse for a "character", and pitiful excuse for a word "character". No matter, for as long as someone is "official" (appeared in some officially sanctioned part of the franchise), poor he/she/it "deserves some love", regardless of the fact that 2 minutes of someone's mental effort can result in a MUCH better "character".

This is only partly "derogatory", for I myself indulge in such things. I'm poking fun at myself as well. :D

Now, I knew this had to be pulled of with a Mosaic starring Crosscut - a (let's face it) pitiful excuse for a word "character" who appeared only on 2 panels of a Marvel TF issue from '86, the first one depicting him in a glow of energy while testing the Space bridge, the second one depicting him explode into pieces due to Bridge's faulty fuel line....but one thing had set him apart from all the others "hi-then-die" guys - he was NAMED.

So, the idea was giving that sorry li'l dude a back-story most profound, not knowing what it'll be. And it waited....

2) I had a discussion with HdE about overly serious and over-the-top writing bursting with pathos that can be seen in writing in general, and how a whole lotta NOTHING can be disguised with big, dramatic words. The talk (d)evolved into a hilarious exchange of pretentious and verbose pseudo-poetic ramblings, and thus the idea of Crosscut the Poet was born!

I compiled that pompous mumbo-jumbo, adapted it for the situation, added quite an amount of equally verbose pretentious fillers, distributed it among the panels and sent the draft to HdE. He Shakespeare-ized the ramblings even further (which I didn't think was possible, but it was!), added several additional juicy passages, and VOILA!

All the script needed was master Roy to bring this fragile beauty and innocent vulnerability to life! :)

...and here it is - a blank slate given the deepest depth imaginable. ;)

[awesome-cookies-and-cream]

i’m gonna scream kyuushi spoilers ahead

I haven’t found all the raws somebody show them to me for helsing and grandpa but like that newest chapter huh? jesus what am i gonna do about this info?

tf when you give your natural enemy the one thing that can kill you, immortal and timeless. Forged from your own blood so you can become equals. and his soul fuses into it posthumously. then you tell him your name so he has the power to completely destroy you. you know as a token of friendship

but actually i was more interested on the parallels of draluc and D. in the grandpa tag chapter, one part struck me the most and that was when they said only draluc is most similar in thinking to D, that’s why only one who can command them towards victory (i wonder if his constitution wasn’t so weak, he’d be able to fight 1-on-1 and win)

there was also a panel there in which D sees Ronaldo and remembers helsing, which cost him the game. God grandpa, you lost because of gayness. get a grip. also i wonder if draluc knew about it and exploited that

the parallels haven’t really been subtle. at first introduction to D, we already see how he’s so free spirited and does what he wants without regard for others so long as it promises fun, a true hedonist. funny enough, isn’t that just draluc too? 

at the end of the chapter he walks over to draluc and tells him to cherish his human friend. so we kinda knew he had a human friend. who also turned out to be a hunter. THE Hunter. and apparently he’s been pestering the guy like how draluc has been doing so to Ronaldo. no for real helsing is literally as tsundere as rona lmao also as cringefail 

also this one:

it’s literally just ronaldo and draluc lmaoooo?

there’s really no point in this. i just want to get it off my chest lmao. like what does it mean? the parallels of the strongest vampire and the weakest vampire and their hunter friends. why is he most similar to the guy?

[winderlylandchime]

Hi! I hope you’re doing well and that your trip is good and fun. But holy shit, i hope you and your partner manage to stay covid free! I’m sending some healing thoughts to your SIL since covid absolutely sucks!

Also a few things i do have to say because you need to know (most of them i was told to tell you guys): we went to the doctor yesterday and he was proudly wearing his new shirt. Everyone found it hilarious and accurate portrayal of him/his year. And then he told the whole office (2 doctors and 3 nurses) that he is now famous on the internet because i told bunch of people about him watching the show. And the doctor who is in charge of his case (the guy who did the surgery lol), looked at me, pointed at him and slowly went ‘you made him other people’s problem?’ And my brother proudly said ‘Yes, she did! *realized what was said* heeeeey, i can be quite a delight, just ask the people on the no porn site’ (yes, that is how he told them about tumblr). And my brother wanted me to let you all know that his cast has to stay on for another week, so he is very sad about that BUT the big news that he immediately looked at me (in the office in front of them btw) and went ‘you gotta tell my new homies about this’ was that in two weeks he has his final check up with his surgeon bc he wants to do all tests one last time and then if all is good which they believe will be, he can officially go home and back to his whatever tf normal life is for him. So looks like I’m losing my two roommates soon. Shit will be boring ngl.

Then the other more important thing! My brother had your blog opened on his tag, but i guess he went to check out the rest of the blog because he walked in this morning and went ‘did you fucking know that they write stories?! About Brian and Blondie? WHAT IS THIS? AND THERES SO MANY FUCKING COOL GIFS TOO. LIKE SHIT TON OF THEM! I saw one where Gale was talking in that interview about Prom and Blondie from that panel and then there were gifs from the episode and behind the scenes with it! That had to take for fucking ever! Do people just make them all the time? See? when *puts out one hand* Fandom and *puts out the other hand* love, come together *puts his hands together* beautiful things come to life.’

So he is currently going through your ao3/bookmarks but i did tell him to read your other fics before the new one.. Btw he didn’t move from the couch for a few hours after he discovered it. His favorites so far are: we didn’t know we could reach the stars (he thought that one was a very accurate portrayal of what Brian and Justin would be like if the writers didnt ruin it), clothes mean nothing until someone lives in them (he really enjoyed that one btw. He especially thought the ‘not the first boy to jerk off to thoughts of Brian in this bed’ was clever as fuck and literally went ‘ooohhh shit’ when he read it)

and Youre like a tattoo (he gasped when he realized the plot and went ‘ITS REVERSED!’). And when he finally made it to your new fic he fucking lost it (he had a tiny report on it)

I did show him your replies from previous messages and here’s the message from the guy himself (read this as if youre listening to a very caffeinated person pacing up and down, for accurate pov): I was a breath of fresh air for them? Fucking hell, so this fandom is in like a hibernation, huh? I’m fucked, aren’t I? Well anyway, thank you stranger for very sweet words. I fuck with this person! I think we’d be friends. I FUCKING LOVE LITTLE EDIE! Me and (his best friends name) always quote the ‘It was quite the scandal actually. It was in all the magazines at the time’ in Jinx’s voice whenever some random shit is asked. Them and their spouse sound like they’re fucking fun to be around. Wait you gotta tell them I read the stories they wrote, i’m still reading other people’s shit, i have a lot to catch up to. But that one that isn’t done yet is fucking brilliant. I mean they all are but I read that one twice! I had to watch the reunion episode from season 3 because it made me all nostalgic when they got back together. It’s exactly how I’d like the show to be. Its nice to read and go mhm thats my bri bri, unlike in the show where it was not my bri but an imposter. I also very much fuck with older Brian who has a beard and glasses. Because he looked pretty as fuck in that little comic con video. I’m excited to see how they end it and i really really hope that they had fun writing these stories because i had a lot of fun reading them. Anyway, tell them, they’re fucking cool, their stories are fucking dope, i also really liked that one about them sharing their clothes AND THE ONE WHERE BLONDIE WAS THE SUGAR DADDY! I fucking told you that will happen..i was just wrong as to where. And im glad to see that the *lifts his cast* ally, is catching on.

PS, we both got all ‘awwww’ and a little emotional ngl, when we read your response how you’ve been thinking of us while writing. And just so you know we spent all day today discussing your fics (when he got to the cliffhanger, he went ‘i am once again being teased just like with the love confession’) and some other fics from other creators that he read and enjoyed. The man is in awe. Every time he’d read a new chapter/fic he goes ‘this is the best thing ive read’ over and over.

Hello hello hello dear sweet anon and brother anon!

Thank you for your well wishes. My SIL tested negative this morning so we are officially in the clear (and can abandon our masks). I think we did a good job being responsible within the circumstances. Luckily, my SIL’s symptoms never got bad and the cold I arrived with (was it a cold or an intense allergic reaction to cleaning my apartment and kicking up all that dust?) never evolved into anything more unpleasant.

I love that we’re not the people on the “no porn site.” And we do all think he’s delightful. I’m glad he’s recovering well and can soon live independently from you but I imagine life will be a lot quieter and less chaotic without him and feline BriBri.

Yes! Gifs allow us to relive every moment of the series, draw parallels etc. Let’s give a hand to @sophsun1 who is basically carrying the fandom on her back with her beautiful gifs.

I am absolutely floored by his reaction to my fics. Thank you so much for passing along the kind words he had. I’m glad he like the 5+1 clothes sharing fic (I have such a soft spot for it), and We Didn’t Know We Could Reach the Stars is such an overlooked fic (I forget I wrote it!). AND of course Tattoo was my beloved fic this year.

The fandom isn’t in hibernation so much as it is small and basically zero new content has been released in eons and so it is a small fandom with nowhere near the works produced that large currently or recently active fandoms have (tbh those fandoms intimidate me - I will read GO fic but joining a discord or writing fic in there? so scary!).

“It was quite the scandal really…” is the other quote I say to my spouse on hair wash / hair turban days! I like to think we *are* fun to be around. Especially if quote RPDR S5 is your idea of fun. Then we’re a blast!

I do have fun writing fics. I bitch and moan and complain, but I love writing them and getting to put them out into the world. I’m even more excited to write and post the last chapter of Fireflies now that I know your brother has read it. And I’m delighted to hear that he thinks I kept his beloved BriBri in character (if we ignore WTF happened to his character in S5).

I’m honestly a little bit emotional from your PS. I write fics because I love to write them but hearing that you’re sitting around discussing them? I love writing them but I do want an audience (otherwise I wouldn’t publish them) and there are fics out there that I feel that way about (written by other people) so for my fics to be that to someone… just, I need a moment and a tissue.

*makes fist* ally

[liaswritesrobots]

Something I find interesting in tf around the world is gender and sexuality changes for dubs.

In Japan Airazor was changed to a guy, which lead to Airazor and Tigatron being the first gay couple in Transformers. Idk if that's what lead Japan to keep making queer and queer-coded tfs but they also made Archadis male when he was originally female being noted years later to be the first (and only to my knowledge) FTM Transformer. We also got Starscream and BB from Japan which was very obviously a gay relationship and Gas Skunk later in Car Robots 2000 who was heavily implied to be gay. Also I'm assuming the Beast Machines Japanese dub implies Nightscream to be gay bc he's seen in a panel with with other characters who were stated/implied to be gay/queer and/or trans.

Also, in France Starscream and Shrapnel were briefly girls! It was only for the movie bc it was a different dubbing team but I think they should have kept it that way into season 3. Congrats on the HRT queens!

[hella1975]

Geto Suguru for the ask game please

First impression

wow @hi-raethia seems really normal about this guy who has 3 minutes of screentime in the entire show

Impression now

he's my best friend he's my pal he's my homeboy my rotten soldier he's my sweet cheese my good time boy

Favorite moment

ooooooooooooo god ive memorised every line this man has ever said but i genuinely lose every scrap of sanity every time i see that one miminana panel of 'we love you we love you we love you/satoru gojo is suguru geto's one and only best friend/but you're not him' im literally biting into a block of wood

Idea for a story

waiter suguru au..... *makes grabby hands at him* let me unload my catering industry trauma onto you babygirl

Unpopular opinion

idc if he killed people in fact i think he should do it again

Favorite relationship

'favourite' is pushing it because they cause me unholy amounts of psychic damage but satosugu has me in an emotional grip unlike any other. also suguru single dad at age 18 with miminana

Favorite headcanon

suguru didn't know who tf satoru was when he joined the college and treated him like pure shit i KNOW he bullied him i feel it in my bones

[lookismaddict]

Lookism Chapter 441 Memes/Thoughts I Have:

(SPOILERS !!! I don’t own any of the Lookism panels and the translations. Only the memes that I made. The sole purpose of this is to provide summaries/reviews for each chapter so if you don’t want to see the rest of it, then just keep scrolling. It’s your choice.)

I really said that I was going to work on this chapter review but I didn't do it until a few days after the chapter has been posted online... Woops, my bad. (My posts will be queued for now, so I didn't post this CURRENTLY. Sorry in advance if I randomly post at around 4 in the morning or something.) Most of you guys probably already saw this, but you know what? Time to bring dinner onto the table! 🍲

H U H ? 👁👁

UMMMM… HELLO??? I stg, if he's referring to Goo... 😭 But oh man, if he were to replace Goo, I wonder how Gun is going to react. And I already heard ab the rumors going around, regarding to what PTJ mentioned before. Even the thing about someone's death, and whatnot. Yes, I know man. 💀 But in all honesty, this Charles Choi arc though... I like it so far. Minus... the death and Charles Choi himself because it's a catalyst for an event that'll happen in the future. Also, yes Charles, you piece of shit. Jichang won't ever think of joining you lol. Even if he agreed, what is there to benefit if he were to side with you? 😀

I don't think anyone has commented on what Charles Choi said about Jichang being a strategist, and he's right about that. Unlike many fighters, I noticed how Jichang is very meticulous when it comes to fighting. He assesses his opponents, like where to properly attack and he notes their weak points and people's most vulnerable spots to aim at, which makes his Battle I.Q. much bigger in comparison to the other First Generation Kings, who just fight with a passionate drive with fists during their fights. (Reminds me of current Daniel.) He's very clever too, and that's one of the reasons why I like Jichang's character.

O K A Y. OLD MAN. SHOWING OFF YOUR NONEXISTENT LEFT ARM, I SEE.

GODDDDD JICHANG, GET UPPPPP MAAAAAANNNNNNNNN. AAAAAAGGHHHH 😫😫😫😫

BRUHHHHHHHHHHH COME ONNNNNNNNNNN!!! I STG, IF PTJ DOESN'T LET THIS MAN WIN- <- My OG reaction 😀

YOU TELL HIMMMMMM JICHANG!!! 😩😩👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

YES JICHANG PULLED OUT THE SHTICK AND LET IT ROLLLLLLL!!! Oh fuck. Wait, WHAT??? W H A T ????????

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?! HOW TF DID THAT HAPPEN BRUHHHHHHHH??? I THOUGHT YOU GOT THIS IN THE BAG, JICHANG!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I'M GONNA GO AND FLIP A BUNCH OF TABLES BC WTFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!

Ok, for starters... Don't they have those DNA test thingies where they investigate thoroughly in crime scenes? Bruh, Charles Choi was HOLDING the gun. CAN'T THEY NOT IDENTIFY HIS OWN FINGERPRINTS??? Also, it's understandable that he might have tipped the police too since he got power. UGGGGHHHHHH PTJ, WHY DO YOU ALWAYS LET THE VILLAINS GET AWAY WITH THEIR CRIMES??? LIKE VIVI GETTING THAT HAPPY ENDING WITH XIAOLONG EVEN THOUGH SHE DOESN'T DESERVE IT. I SWEAR, JICHANG'S BROTHERS ARE GOING TO SIDE WITH DANIEL AND GET REVENGE ON CHARLES CHOI. *s i g h s* Well, anyways... It's time to send them off...

WHY IS THIS MAKING ME SOB BRUHHHHH. 😭😭😭😭😭 UGGHHHHH, WHEN THEY BOTH DIED I REALLY CRIED FOR THEM BECAUSE I ALREADY GOT AN EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT TO THE TWO OF THEM. 💔

Nah, because this mf will surely get hit with MASSIVE karma. I'm just waiting for that sweeeeeeeet sweet day. (Sorry Crystal, but your dad's a dick. 🤷🏽‍♀��)

PLEASE DANIEL, AVENGE THEM!!! UGGHHHH IM STILL DEVASTATED OVER THEM. 😭😭😭

I do admit, Jinyoung DOES look good leaning on a motorcycle while smoking on a cig. Also, IDK WHY, but Daniel looks so cute carrying all of those boxes behind him. Honestly, this interaction between Jichang and Daniel looks like Jichang is sending Daniel off to night school or something LMFAO. The boxes looks like a big ass backpack, ngl. ALSO, YES JICHANG, DON'T WORRY ABOUT DANIEL. LEAVE IT ALL TO HIM TO FIND JINYOUNG PARK AND TO BEAT CHARLES CHOI TO A PULP! ��👍🏽

WAIT... HOLD ON NOW. SO YOU'RE TELLING ME, THE "GRIMM PLASTIC SURGERY CENTER" IS IN GANGNAM-GU ??? Hold up... Tell me, this isn't where Mangi from Viral Hit went for his plastic surgery on his nose...

Tbh I'm not caught up to the recent chapter of Viral Hit, but this was in Viral Hit's Ep. 74 on Webtoon. So... could it be, that he... went there to get plastic surgery...? 😀 (I must be trippin. If I'm incorrect, then I apologize. That part caught my eye while I was reading and I had to tie it back to the First Affiliate because... I FOUND THAT COINCIDENTAL. LEAVE ME ALONE-)

Yup, sounds about right. 💀

Omg? THE HOT DOCTOR IS BACK!!! I KNEW IT, HE'S TOO GOOD-LOOKING TO BE FORGOTTEN AS A MINOR CHARACTER!!! 😳😳😳

To be honest, he looks like he could pass as Eugene and Yoosung's older brother or something. BUT, HELLO??? 1ST AFFILIATE PRESIDENT?????? AEEEUUUUGGGHHHH THIS HOTTIE IS THE 1ST AFFILIATE PRESIDENT??? I'M- 😩😩😩😩

You see... he is one MIGHTY FINE, DOCTOR. 🥴 I wanna see if Doc got some fighting moves or not. 👀 If he does, then he got me S O L D. 🔥

Ok, but this chapter's focus really was on Charles Choi and whatever he did. I'm so eager to see him get beat up by everybody. Oh, but hold on now... If Tom Lee found out what REALLY happened, then that would be a problem too. Hehehehe 😈

Time to wait for the next chapter! ✌🏽

[upagainstthesunset]

Has it really been three months since my last Flash Vol 2 read through post?? I’d better get back to it then. So here’s Issue 43 - The Trouble With Kilg%re!

[Image: Comic cover featuring the Flash yelling out and reaching for two nude, metallic figures that are holding hands. Title text says, “The Fastest Man Alive! Flash” and the tagline says “Lost in the world of Kilg%re!” Other text says “43 Oct 90″, “Messner-Loebs, LaRocque, Marzan”, and “Watch the Flash on CBS-TV!” /End]

Wally’s about to do some pounding. Btw I think it’s a great visual choice to have it look like a centipede. 

[Image: Cropped comic panel of a young man on the floor holding his neck next to a thing that looks like a centipede. In the foreground Flash’s ringed hand picks up a hammer. /End]

I only barely remember what’s going on and who these people are. Regardless, who tf would be eating that.

[Image: Comic panel of two men in a dark room with the tv on. One is wearing a robe, saying “Listen, you want some oatmeal ‘n’ gravy? Maybe with some fried jalapeños mixed in? We got lots.” The other man holds a messy stack of books and papers to his chest and replies, “Uh, no. Thanks anyway.” /End]

Let’s be real. I’m truly just here to see Wally and Linda interact.

[Image: Comic panel of the Flash saying “It’ll be dangerous. You stay here and...” while Linda clings to his arm and says, “Are you kidding? I’m with you like glue!” /End]

So then Tina’s colleagues attach Wally and Seamus inhabits Linda again in order to eye blast them.

[Image: Comic panel of Linda using powers from her eyes to attack a man and woman who have expressions of agony. One let’s their grip off of the Flash. Linda, possessed, says “’Tis me pleasure t’be after servin’ ye, Wally boy!” /End]

Oh wait was that supposed to be Mason who was watching TV and eating weird food??

Oh no and somehow Kilg%re has turned Jerry back into the monster he was way back before they got him cured. Poor Tina, talk about traumatic.

[Image: Comic panel of Jerry, shirtless and seemingly standing in cloudy steam, attacking Tina who has a tear in her eye and looks towards the viewer. Text boxes representing Wally’s dialog say, “It’s a blast from the past. Jerry’s become the monster I saved Tina from before... Except this time he’s my friend...” /End]

Linda’s able to use the eye blast powers without letting Seamus take the reigns, but she’s really not being very careful with it. 😬

Not in real space anymore? At least that might mean they won’t be totally hurt when they come out of this? 

Then Dr Camper shows up all sinister and centipede-like, fused with Kilg%re. Saemus takes over Linda again, and Wally starts getting absorbed until she does another eye blast.

[Image: Comic panel of the Flash with long pieces of metal pulling his arms up, and his torso and legs down. It looks as if the metal is absorbing him, and he cries out “Aaaaaahh!!” /End]

Things calm down a little bit, but they’re still in virtual space, and Kilg%re pops out and grabs Wally. Lol meanwhile Linda is basically evaluating if it’s gonna be worth dating this guy. 😂

[Image: Comic panel of Linda, Tina and Jerry looking apprehensive. Linda asks, “Tina, when you were going out with Wally, did this sort of thing happen...?” Tine replies, “All the time. It was like dating Rod Serling!” /End]

Linda and Wally get sucked into the mechanical floor, and then... the fuck??

[Image: Comic panel of a large grayish being sitting in a tunnel that looks a mix of metal panels and cosmic clouds. The being is bald, had a triangle on its forehead, and sits with feet together and arms crossed over its chest. Wally floats in front of it, about the length of its forearm. The being says, “Hello, Wally... I am the source you have sought... The child within the machine... I am the K*lg*re.” /End]

What?? What a twist. So Seamus was just Kilg%re all along. Well damn how about that. An anagram.

[Image: Three comic panels. The first Linda in the foreground says, “I guess so. I don’t really remember what happens when...” In the background Wally says, “And this is where you pretend to be Linda?”

The second panel Wally grabs Linda’s upper arm and she makes an upset face. He says, “Give it a rest, Kilg%re. Nobody here is buying any!”

The third shows Wally and Linda, who is now naked and a metallic glowing green. Wally in surprise says, “Then I realized... ‘Seamus O’Relkig’ was an anagram for Kilg%re!” /End]

So wait a second. Kilg%re wanted to stage a battle where it died fighting the Flash so that it could just kind of chill and observe humans and be an internet troll? And then it lets naked green Linda and Wally go. Along with a gift. Eat up, Wally. 

[Image: Two comic panels. The first is a close up of green Linda’s face. Her fingers are together and floating above them in front of her face is a pink ball the size of a marble. She has a coy expression and the Kilg%re speaks through her saying, “It’s a present I have f’r you...”

In the second panel, she points a finger upwards and energy move the ball from her hand into Wally’s mouth. He is surprised. Still speaking as Kilg%re, she says,  “It’ll be of use to ye, in y’r moment of greatest need.” /End]

Final thoughts:

Weird. I feel like that’s a good word for a lot of these early Wally stories lol. It def didn’t go the direction I expected, but hey at least it was interesting! The horror movie element of it was pretty fun, and I’m glad we got to see Tina again. I know a lot of fans don’t like her, but I do. 

I think it’s also interesting to bring Kilg%re back. I don’t really know much about it as a villain type entity across miscellaneous DC stuff, but I did by chance happen upon the JLI story with Maxwell Lord that it was in, which was a surprise. So I guess it does go on to cause future mischief.

As with the last issue, I’m obsessed with the Wally/Linda scenes. Cannot get enough of them. I want a whole spin off that’s just them getting into hijinks and trying to convince themselves they don’t like each other when they so clearly do. But now I think there’s a handful of issues before she comes back into the story, so I guess I’d better get through those soon.

[rainbowgod666]

The perfect DC/Marvel comic is like this

Its a batman book, the joker is killed off in the first panel and that has no meaning or repercussions over the timeline

The watchmen are a thing and Dr. Manhattan figured out a way to get rid of the whole "every moment is the present" thing. This makes it easier for the writer to write its dialogues. He is still earth-shatteringly autistic and everyone loves him for this

Also he and deadpool accidentally bond over "seeing the 4th wall". Deadpool is also buddies with moon knight. Guess what my favourite charachter is?

Good ol IRL me is there and its canon that the one time when i tried to help constantine every demon/spirit/whatever that has a stake on him was SCREAMING to him "get tf away from him not even death's gonna save you". Which i mean, rude

Welcome to the multiverse. Batman has small dick energy and superman is such a pacifist some people have trouble seeing him as anything other than "alien übermensch thats just a really nice guy and thats eat". He may be white bread but here in italy we say "buono come il pane" or "good as bread" so yeah hes a Certified Good Boy

I cannot stress enough how much unimportant is the death of the joker. He basically might as well have never existed.

Wonder Woman comes to the realization (after i confronted her about it because FFS WHY DO I HAVE TO BE THE MULTIVERSE'S BABYSITTER) that MAYBE reducing her entire power assortment to "r/TwoXChromosomes" is a bad thing both for boys AND girls alike. I know the song goes "forget your balls and grow a pair of tits" but i would instead put programs so that boys feel safe about their masculinity and girls wont have to worry about Bad People In Dimly Lit Alleys.

SCP and MONUMENTMYTHOS are referenced really tangentially. Only the wikis (official or not) aknowlegde this fully

There are at least three scenes where tony stark reads about elongated muskrat on the news. In all of them hes disappointed

He also references him appearing on big bang theory, which in THIS universe is ran by the charachters of the series as a fun class B science program that has way more audience than it should have. Sheldon met Dr. Manhattan, who described our multi-knocking boy as just like him but "less knowledgeable and more arrogant" (no fr shelly is one /gamemode 1 from becoming dr. pasadiña or whatever)

Considering this is "DC and Marvel, but Alex did his bullshit", expect dumb shit

I am introduced with a MadCom reference that is also a Courage the cowardly dog reference. KeK

The Owlman is revealed to have had a massive brain tumor that straight up removed his ability to think rationally while making him speak like his cigars are made of dictionaries

So many events from so many storylines happen all at once lol

Spidey disapproves of O'Hara. Like everyone else.

Multiple references are everywhere

There is SERIOUS PROOF that thanos accidentally something important when he was testing the infinity gauntlet, whoops!

Gamora tries to kill me after i try to roast her for how she is. She is shocked to find out that me getting Kakyoin'd did nothing but "ow"

@moringmark is referenced in a 4 panel scene in the toh universe

A cover story reveals that, on the moon, a portal opens. The portal is traversed by a shiny deoxys and many little among us crewmates. The impostors are all black (literally) (if you see racism in this, fuck you not everyone is an american cop) (on that note, watch southland) and act as guards for the group. Deoxys is in its base form

The valve universe is a thing so welcome BLU, RED, aperture and black mesa!