#hehe funny gay men

[robynrileyart]

some extremely minor characters from my CRUSH. soapghost fanfic series. matthews gets buried alive not far from where ghost is and o'connelly is the field medic who helps soap get them out again.

[vaugarde]

no lets talk about the lesbophobia and misogyny actually. tell me why a minor femslash ship pisses you off so much to the point you disqualify them when theyre winning and you cry that you got “fucked over” by the person who coined it and was clearly taking it in good fun? or do you only like femslash when it means your male faves can hook up without a girl getting in the way and feel vaguely uncomfortable when it exists completely independent of that

[sleepiestslooth]

i’m bored have my headcanons of some empires boys i enjoy

don’t ask where oli’s sexuality is he doesn’t know either

[satoruhour]

HIHII hope you are doing well!!!

I have a request but if you're not comfortable writing it's completely fine too!!

Anyways~ can you write something with University professor geto x top student reader??? They have a lot of sexual tension and geto continuously targets the reader in his lectures only for her to storm into his office after a test in which he didn't give her the marks she deserved just so he could piss her off and eventually leading them to blow off some steam together hehe-

HEJSJSH ANYWAYS I HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT REST OF THE DAY💗💗

-🍒

I GOT THAT DUMB D*CK !

a/n: hi cherry 2! saying 2 because i already have another cherry anon, thank u for waiting for this btw sorry this took so long omggg!!! i wanna make it similar to the short blurb i did here, but ill leave out reader being a camgirl! a lot of lore talk, just a warning

wc: 8k (sigh ....)

warnings: so much lore lol sorry, no beta we die like men, age gap (32 / 24), professor!geto, fem!reader, geto is also a cam worker, masturbation (both f and m), toy use during f! masturbation (vibrator), fantasising, pet names, praise, degradation, use of ‘slut’ and ‘whore’, oral (m receiving, f receives briefly at the end), dumbification (ig?) face-fucking, deep-throating, spitting in mouth, unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink, cum eating, implied multiple rounds, n*sfw under the cut

no one could really pinpoint the reason why professor geto had picked on you, called you out so much, and why you entertained the incessant questions. it was unbecoming of a prof., he knew, it was never smart to favour one person (negatively, in this case) in a room of bright students who could read between the lines. but he just feels himself so drawn to your furrowed eyebrows and words laced with venom, because at the end of the day, he can see that you aren’t all talk.

you challenge his views and you do it in a way that catches him off-guard. you propose insane arguments that you willingly would die at the grave just to find evidence for; or it could just be because he was staring too much at the way your mouth moved and your eyes expressed everything to pay attention to your words, finding that you were just too beautiful to be chasing a linguistics degree.

this was another thing: geto suguru could possibly have anyone he wanted. he was fine. shoulders pulled back in proper posture, hair either tied up fully or just halfway, and always, always wearing shirts with sleeves that reach his wrist. to that, everyone could see just how bulked the man was, top looking too tight all the time.

geto knew he was fine, too, because on top of (and before) being a professor, he found that he could get a good amount of money by just streaming — camera propped below his neck and obviously tight button-up shirt discarded to reveal his tattooed body, while he has his legs spread and the thirsty, horny comments flooding in on the platform. it’s been a norm by now, started from his uni days where he needed some extra money to support his fees and living necessities.

one year turned into two, two years turned into stagnancy during his third and fourth years (save for a few occasional streams), and up came a little funny graduation stream suggested by his best friend. geto had spent a good half ’n hour talking about his time in university and thanking his viewers, changing up the setting almost immediately by showing hard he was.

[uzum4kisl0ver]: YEAAAH we’re getting to the good stuff, thank u for feeding us so well these few years uzumaki-san!!

[minstash96]: Congrats on graduating Uzumaki-san!! I rmb joining during your third year and found out from everyone u were getting busier </3 but Im glad youre back again!!!

[g_bigdick_s]: fellas is it gay to support your best friend’s graduation jerking off stream

the flood of “yes”’s replying to gojo made the streamer laugh, thankful that his best friend had listened a little and at least changed gojobigdicksatoru to just his “G.S.” initials to avoid people finding his LinkedIn. from there, geto had gotten into the true nature of his stream easily, fishing out his cock to stroke and loving the sounds of tips coming in, the name of his alias Uzumaki continually commented. since then, it’s become a side hustle — finishing his masters, training to become a professor, it’s all natural to him, taking even further steps to make sure he isn’t found out.

exactly, he could have anyone he wanted — a fan from his streaming account, or one of satoru’s regular fwb’s but instead he finds himself drawn to someone else, you, the second year student in his bilingualism and multilingualism module that he has no trouble teaching despite his freshly employed status.

at the start of the week, the gods decided thought it would be funny to delay the campus bus that would take you to the english department for a consultation session with your professor. you couldn’t focus in lectures due to bad cramps, you were behind on your non-major related courses, the bad luck just seemed to seep into one day after another. you had woken up late, putting on a terrible outfit that no one really cared about, except your professor who just had a smirk on his face.

“if you notice, runes were created as they were spoken — spelt as they are said which almost look like ‘pictographs’,” prof. geto switches to the next slide with the runes and their meanings alongside a jumble of symbols that send the whole class into hysterics, “can anyone sound out the phonetics of these runes to me? hint: even though i said they look like pictographs, the first rune is definitely not an E.”

he was known for asking questions during lectures, pleased with anyone that would even try because he knew how quiet lecture theatres could get. he was exactly like that in university, too, letting satoru take all the attention due to the many unknown people in the same room. now, he found that asking the questions was a little entertaining, seeing the way students look back down at their laptops and avoid eye contact. but he doesn’t need to do anything and his body is already turnt towards you. he’s not even pointing physically, which he thinks he’s done a good job of restraining himself.

ᛊᛃᚨᚾᛖᛚ

“the words and names should be as they sound — so ‘s’ or ᛊ should translate into a ‘c’ since they didn’t have a C back then and it’s the closest sound to C. ᛃ can’t be ‘h’ because of the usage of H in hagl . . its pronunciation is different and plus, we’ll spell it how we say it, so maybe it’s ‘j’?” you mutter to yourself, an urge to answer the quickest, always. you aren’t sure where this streak came from, but you’ve been smart always, “sja . . it either can be chanel or channel since there’s a rule you can’t use the same rune twice in succession . .”

professor geto already knows you’d be the first to answer, raising your hand even without looking since you were still calculating the other four letters which you put together fairly quickly.

you take the safest route, “chanel, with one N.”

geto clicks his tongue and sucks in a breathe, “so close, miss (y/n), but it’s because i cheated a little on my part.” you can feel your blood boil and the grimaces of other students when he switches to the next slide and there’s a little grin on his face. it says — ‘there is no distinction between capital and small runes, nor can you use the same rune twice continually.’

“you are right, partially, but i did want to drive home the point,” which he’s sure you already know. “that words with two N’s or L’s or whatever, would only show up in the runic language as only one character.” your face morphs into something of annoyance and the grin on professor geto’s face only widens — that defiant, headstrong nature is something he loved, but the grin drops a little when he imagines something . . out of the classroom. his pants tighten.

you mirror him, clicking your tongue and reluctantly taking down the note in your documents before sinking into your chair — not even chō, you friend, could find the proper words to comfort you. you spend the rest of the lecture, sulking, unwillingly answering his incessant questions with a scowl on your face and a headache forming.

this never stops—

“miss (y/n)?” one-on-one meetings were the bane of your existence, but it was the only way to connect with your professors properly — here, geto calls you to talk about your latest essay where you were the last on the roster. by then, everyone has filed out with nobara waiting for you just outside the classroom.

“don’t have to call my name, i’m the only one here.” you mutter under your breath, and geto feels a little annoying today.

“what was that?”

“nothing—”

he hums, scooting his chair closer once you sit, and while you find the gesture a little weird, you’re overcome with just how good he smells and it only fuels your hatred more. it’s no fair that he’s so . .

“miss (y/n).” you sigh with an apology, frankly not ready to hear how he’d be attacking your essay. it was written on a rushed timeline, you didn’t cite your sources properly, you knew some criticism was warranted as much as you didn’t like to hear it from your professor’s mouth.

“. . you do know you can’t just rely on your brain, right?” geto speaks softly and you feel your heart flutter at his tone. he points to the places where you forget your in-text citations.

“but professor, information about syntax and phonetics just comes like second nature . .” you mumble, ignoring how he closes his eyes and hisses, “and all the sources on the internet say different things.”

“then just find a reliable one.”

you tsk, taking the paper from him and flipping to the next page, “well, i did one here.” the paper makes a sound when you press your finger into it, aware of how close you are. from here you can feel the heat radiating off his body, unconsciously rubbing your thighs together.

“too long ago, needs to be within five years.” geto’s lying through his teeth.

“no, it does not!” you pull back and look at him incredulously. ah, the feeling’s gone, “not in language related papers, at least!”

“but that claim was from the 2000’s, miss (y/n), for all we know it could’ve been resolved by then.”

“then why didn’t you say anything about chō’s scholar article from the 1990’s?” you’re standing up, now, furrowed eyebrows depicting the very thing you feel: confusion, agitation at being treated like this. given you weren’t in the best condition when you wrote this essay, but you still gave it your all.

“her argument was about the interconnectedness between the romance languages — yours,” he punctuates while leaning back in his chair. you don’t like how your eyes flit down to his lap, but you’re forced to look up when he stands up too, “is about the use of ciphers in comparison to an immature language developed on the internet that created in the 2019s. any scholar claim before that would be void.”

your blood boils just like that day. alas, he had a good point, but like always, the gentle slit of his eyes and the all-knowing smile didn’t match the bullying he was laying on you and you despise it.

even! even, as you notice how there’s probably less than a inch between your faces as you puff out your chest to look more intimidating and yet geto suguru towers over you. and even when your heart beats loudly in your ears, feeling his hot breath fan over your own face while you don’t miss how he licks his lips and glances down to yours not-so-secretly.

you swallow at the silence, until there’s the annoying notification of his Outlook cutting the tension and soon you’re snatching the essay from him, walking to where your bag is. although you want to let your anger overflow, all you say is a tame, “noted. thanks, prof” with a glare, eye twitching.

you made sure to slam the classroom door with shaky hands . .

. . but you’re not very good at capping your rage. “i swear to god! he better fucking check his mirror and admire himself because soon i’m going to beat him up so bad that everyone can’t recognise him.” geto’s lips turn up in a small smirk at your flared expression he just witnessed — he just loves your dirty mouth and he finds himself thinking of it more and more often.

chō only can tut, “so you find him attractive?”

“what? how the hell did you infer that from my rant?” you scoff, shoving her to the side, not aware that your whispered outburst is heard as he’s packing up. he simply enjoys looking at you walk away through the glass slit of the door, hips swaying unknowingly.

“bad news, guys,” geto, or rather Uzumaki, sighs on screen, adjusting so the lens of the camera rested just below his collarbones. easily, his chat fills up with a mixture of horny comments and genuine questions, chuckling to himself as he unbuttons his shirt. he feels more like a sinner at this point, suddenly flustered with the confession he’s about to make.

“i think i’ve taken quite a liking to someone,” geto hums, hands going to his trousers to palm his bulge. he had to get home immediately after that, cancelling his meetings for the day. with a single text to gojo, the white-haired man was excited to hear everything about this new person, thankful that his best friend will finally not be alone.

[g_bigdick_s]: TELL US! TELL US!!!! TELL US!

but professor geto is lost instantly, imagining you as he massages his erection. thinking about your anger transforming into pleasure, into obedience for him as he forces your mouth down on his cock. oh . . how’d your mouth and hands feel, how’d your pussy feel.

geto groans, already removing his dick from the constraints, and pumping it to full length. he doesn’t even talk much, only the endless comments and tips reminding him he was still on live. spitting on his hand, he wraps his hand around himself again, thumbing the tip and hoping it’d be your tongue swirling around it.

what would you look like on your knees, taking each inch of his cock down your throat? would he be able to wipe the defiance off your face? would he be able to fuck his smart student, dumb?

“you need a good destress, woman,” chō suggests over the phone, voice a bit uneven due to it being stuck in between her shoulder and ear, “go on camstar or something, i’m sure you’ll find something hot there.”

“chō, i am not going on a porn streaming website! i’ll very much settle for my smut fics, thank you.”

“boo, don’t you get bored? i get that normal adult industry videos are super inaccurate but . . when was the last time you’ve watched an unfiltered, unedited jerk off vid? that’s the hottest.”

you scoff, “yeah, like you would know, miss complain-whenever-you-get-dick-pics.”

“that’s because it’s unsolicited! plus all the men who send me pics have ugly dicks. if anything i’m more open to get unsolicited pussy pics rather than consensual dick pics at this point.” your friend nonchalantly says, spreading her fingers to look at her manicured nails, “but anyway, prof geto is on your ass too much lately. maybe he wants to get in your pants?”

you don’t recoil at the suggestion as much as you expect to and you’re puzzled at that — “please never say that again.” just as you’re saying this, you’re typing in camstar.org even though you told yourself not to but deep down, you know that you’ve been craving more than just twitter links and porn with plot stories. on the front page, you’re seeing a video thumbnail of a guy with a fairly big . . feature, countless tattoos lining his body while you can catch a faint glimpse of his long hair in the dark room — it’s the only one that draws you in, other streams merging into a blur.

chō’s voice fades off when you notice just how popular the stream is, cursor hovering over the title (“just a ramblefap, need to release some tension”) almost tempting you to click.

“okay, will get back to you,” succumbing to your needs, you shamelessly grab your vibrator just as she cheers into the phone. you can hear that’s my girl! on the other side as you stifle a smile, bidding a goodbye before you settle into bed. from there, you do what you always do: relax for a few, slow your breathing, get yourself wet a little—

click.

The stream you have attempted to view has ended a minute ago. We apologise for the inconvenience caused. View more livestreams below:

you shove the vibrator under your pillow and bury your head into it, screaming.

“i mentioned in yesterday’s lecture that Latin evolved from the dialects of the Italic peoples of ancient Italy, or Latium, a region in central western Italy. over time, Latin absorbed elements from other languages, such as Etruscan and Greek, and it became the main language of the western Mediterranean.” professor geto rambled on in classic geto fashion — it was his passion that made him so easy to listen to, as with the many enamoured girls with googly eyes and the guys who wish they could carry themselves the way geto did.

you’d say the same thing: his love for his subject of study made him attractive — charming even — as much as you didn’t want to admit to your friend, but you’d be more open with your attraction like everyone is if he wasn’t—

[9:52am, (y/n) -> chō 💟] so fucking annoying and cocky and picking on me all the time!!!!!! im soooo sick of him im so serious omfg ....

but today, he’s looking less at you and more at other students, or even marvelling at the terrible paint job of the classroom as he goes from slide to slide. he talks about the derivation in which French separates from Latin, borrowing similar spellings and meanings from the old language while separating the way they are spoken.

“French is the most divergent of the romance languages because of strong Gallic and Frankish influences. The Celtic Gauls spoke a language similar to Old Dutch but adopted Latin as the Romans invaded Gaul.” you don’t even have to look at him to get him thinking of lewd things, spiralling into his fantasies ever since last night. geto is a little fatigued, too, having lost sleep over his fucking student which he just can’t help bothering. excitement at having you in class before is now turning into dread with every week that passes, and this week is just one instance.

“uh— i-i know you guys aren’t well-versed in either, but with your knowledge of both languages,” geto pulls at his tie. he feels hot, “discuss with your tutorial groups, the differences between the two and list down examples. just come up with one difference, but preferably name a few instances.”

[10:01am, (y/n) -> chō 💟] wish u were here im so bored 😭😭 profs acting so weird today tho

[10:01am, chō 💟 -> (y/n)] is he looking hot and bothered, nervous ??? like he wants to cry? im tellin you he wants you fr

of course she’d come out of her sickness-induced sleep just to bother you about him having the hots for you.

[10:02am, (y/n) -> chō 💟] you’re so ... i swear pls shut up he may want me but i do NOT want him

[10:03am, chō 💟 -> (y/n)] not even while you were just ranting about how his side profile looked a little too good in lecture yesterday?? anyway i hope you’ll be able to get that nut tn 🙏🏼 that guy on camstar sounded hot asf

[10:04am, (y/n) -> chō 💟] ikr i cant believe i got cockblocked by a fuckin livestream ending 💀 thank you fr i need it atp

“any progress here?” he comes out behind you and you slam the phone so hard you give the both of you a scare while your other friends exchange giggles with each other. what you don’t know, is how his arm is positioned upon the back of your chair and his whole body hovers just beside yours. you’re threatened to look, but you know if you do, you’d be falling deeper into the pit that you promised yourself not to fall into.

“yup, we’re just discussing things about how in terms of grammar, French has conjugation but almost no declension. but— uh, it rather uses word order to express some of the intricacies that Latin expresses through word endings.”

you can see geto nod from your peripheral, “good. good answer, any examples to show me?”

your friends nod towards you since you’re usually the one with all the information about different languages. they aren’t foreign to the way geto keeps calling on you to answer him, too, so you shouldn’t have any problem with this, right?

wrong. you’re stuttering through your answer, turning your head finally and being met with the sight of prof geto looking down on you like a deer caught in headlights. you think that being in lecture theatres, sitting near to the back and your hatred in general has desensitised you to the beauty of your professor, because being under him like this makes your core pulse uncomfortably and your voice shaky.

“. . hm? what was that?”

“i was uhm— saying how— uh,” the way geto nods at you makes you more nervous, painting you as someone who someone who had all bark and no bite, but the other knows very well that you had a nasty bite. you’re smart and witty, pretty, hot as fuck, and if anything, it’s taking everything in geto not to bend you over and show you your place in this very classroom in front of everyone, too.

“little lady got nothin’ for me today?” geto purses his lips and lets his teasing side take over, an easy-going smile taking over his features that you just want to kiss and slap off at the same time. wait.

“i didn’t get enough sleep because i was too busy trying to rewrite the damn essay you said i had outdated and missing sources for,” you speak through gritted teeth, feeling a mixture of arousal and pure rage for the man hovering over you.

geto juts his lip out in a pout, face getting dangerously close to yours and challenging you. he just hopes your two friends won’t say anything, “well, darling, if you picked an easier topic to argue about, you wouldn’t be doing that, would you?”

“well, sorry i’m always trying to outdo myself. are you, professor geto? what with your boring suits and black and white slide designs?”

you click your tongue and turn back to your phone to pull up your chat with chō while geto takes a deep breath, desperately hoping the hard-on wouldn’t show through his slacks. your other two friends only giggle even more at the exchange, because for the rest of the class, professor geto is on edge, unable to teach coherently.

[11:17pm, chō 💟 -> (y/n)] YOU DID WHAAAAATTTTT...???? GIRL YOU SAID THAT???!!!!!!

[11:18pm, (y/n) -> chō 💟] bro what if i get expelled.. i shouldnt have but he was pissing me off so much... i did put an apology in the end tho

by then, you’ve already submitted your rewritten essay, putting in a short note at the end for your behaviour in class. although you don’t take it back, you’re still trying to play it safe especially with how much you paid to get into university. you scroll along camstar, bored out of your mind and hoping to find something as compelling as the inked guy from last week, but nothing really draws you in. until you’re refreshing the page, and just like the previous time, the popularity of that same bulking guy seems to push his video to the top.

and finally, before you’re clicking into the video, you check out his profile: in his early thirties, started this account when he was 24 and in university. you smack your lips at that — he’s been doing this for almost ten years? that’s dedication. in curiosity, you scroll down his account, seeing the progression of which this guy built up his figure and tattoos that litter his body. he’s kept the same format, camera showing his body chest down until you’re lazy to scroll more, a little disappointed in not being able to find any indication of his face.

you think that maybe you saw a glimpse of that wrist tattoo that matched the tattoo on your professor’s wrist, but you could just be imagining things.

“alright guys . .” the man on the screen huffs, clothes already discarded to get straight to the point, and you’re recording a small snippet of the same guy you told chō about. “had a rough day today.”

the onslaught of comments going i can make u feel better!!! Take ur anger out on me Uzumaki-san makes you sputter and laugh, sending that video first before you’re taking another. your attention is stolen for a moment, seeing chō react with emojis to your video message (“let’s see what emails i got today, huh?”), but the structure of sentences that the man speaks soon brings you out of jollity and into shock.

“how cute, an essay sent straight to my email.” geto wants to do anything but look at emails right now, but ever since he’s gotten your rewritten assignment, it’s all he’s wanted to check out if it wasn’t for the many meetings and errands he had to run today. “yadda yadda . . oh?”

“i’m sorry for today’s lesson,” purposely pausing to leave out his name, geto continues on, “i shouldn’t have reacted in that way no matter the situation.” a smirk forms on his face while your body fills with dread. in your panic, you pull up your own document whilst catching all of this on camera, tracking each word as the man on camstar.org continues to say out your apology word by word.

and then bit by bit, you’re making out how the man behind the camera might, just might be your linguistics professor. the broad shoulders, the jawline, the long hair, the manspread . .

but even with your heightened combination of excitement and revelation, you don’t click away, blindly sending the video to your friend and then shamefully digging under your pillow to grab your vibrator.

“teaching people is so difficult sometimes, guys,” he grunts, pulling down his underwear and revealing his already hard cock. he lets out a shaky sigh as he wraps a hand around his shaft, “you usually get the people who won’t do any work, the ones who are absent half the time — usually they go hand in hand.”

professor geto laughs and you twitch at the lovely sound. “but . . there’s this one girl . . in my classes— f-fuck.”

you’re entranced, watching your professor masturbate in front of thousands of people who possibly didn’t know a thing about this man while you try to get your jaw off the floor, “who is entirely different from these categories.”

“she’s smart,” geto groans out and you watch transfixed as he starts to pump himself, hips grinding up into his palm, “she’s so smart that i’d want to get to know her one day and just talk about anything.”

“s-she’s so fucking attractive, too, you guys won’t even— oh goddd . .” you feel like you’re being watched, so you’re careful with how you’re putting your vibrator to your core and once you start it, the moan that leaves you lines up with geto’s deeper groans. it turns you on so damn much.

with his head tilted back, he’s long gone as he moves his hands faster and faster, the slick noises of his pre-cum and spit mixing in together — geto only wishes he could act on his desires once the course was over, but knows you’ll probably be mortified at the prospect. at least here, he can imagine that it’s your mouth or cunt doing all the work.

“s-shitttt . .” the professor sounds out, hissing when he thumbs his tip and even more pre comes spilling out and while you watch, you’re hypnotised by the beautiful moans in its perfect cadence and the thickness of his cock. by now his chest is heaving and he’s holding onto his bedsheets so tight you wish it was your thighs.

“i want to fuck her silly, fuck all of those stupid facts out of her head and get her dumb on my cock,” geto whines, hips fully bucking up now while you press your vibrator deeper into your clit. you’re left wondering how his mouth would feel, to shut him up by pressing him into your cunt until he can’t breathe, soak his stupid fucking suits, “want to hear her moan my name.”

you whimper at all the things professor geto swears he wants to do to you, grinding into your hand while he speeds up as well. he doesn’t speak, simply stroking himself as he thighs tense up and he squeezes his shaft with head full of visions of you in terribly lewd positions, making disgusting sounds, and all for him. it isn’t long before geto cums with a loud drawn out moan, shooting his cum onto his torso with a sigh before taking a sticky hand to his lips, licking it off — “i’d want to see my cum dripping out of her one day.”

that sends a chill down to your core, biting your pillow before you release softly all over your hand and vibrator; you spend the rest of the night watching professor geto’s other videos.

[12:32am, chō 💟 -> (y/n)] oh. OH..........

“i should’ve just taken an off-day today, i do not want to get back our results.” chō rubs at her eyes and temples, wanting anything to do with the return of test marks, but unfortunately it was the week after midterms and it was inevitable, “don’t need to ask you though, you’re probably not worried at all.”

“trust me, i am,” you bite the inside of your cheek. it’s been at least . . two weeks after that whole debacle, and despite your intense vents with your friend and the continuous picking on by prof. geto, nothing out of the blue was happening. except, maybe, your growing physical need for your professor and your simultaneous, increasing hatred for him.

“it’s only midterms — you don’t need to worry too much since it doesn’t contain a high percentage. what you should be focusing on are your finals. we’ll work on your shortcomings and mistakes here so you guys will do the best when the time comes.”

and when professor geto comes around to hand you your test, all you do is glare up through your lids, taking it from him before feeling your whole world crumble.

“a B+?!” your mouth gapes open at the blatant 65/100 mark that glares back at you. you know that you would’ve gotten anything but a 65, willing yourself to study harder and harder just to rub it in his pretty little face that you weren’t falling behind in his class. at this point it’s got to be personal, so soon, you’re packing up your things angrily with the intent to storm his office after your other classes.

it’s late in the afternoon when you finally finish your other tutorials on a short fuse, him clearly getting ready to head home by the darkness of his office when you shove your way through the door.

professor geto is sat in a laid-back position, tie hung on the hooks installed in the office and a few buttons are unbuttoned, revealing the very familiar tattoos you’ve become acquainted with.

“to who do i owe the pleasure?”

“cut the crap, prof.,” you scowl, using your foot to slam the office door close. despite the late nights being buried in your sheets, you won’t let yourself be treated like this, “i deserved anything but a 65 on midterms.”

geto tilts his head, sitting up and gesturing out to you; you realise he wants to see your test paper.

“ah!” with a finger, he makes a show of finding for your obvious mistakes which was minimal — but the way he marks obnoxiously tells you everything you need to know, “here. your comprehension of the similarities between Latin and Ancient Greek was too surface level, you didn’t explain why—”

“i. did!” you press down into the paper like the first time, leaning over his table and reading out the exact answer you wrote just a few days ago, “here, since your blind ass wants to act like i wasn’t answering the question.” you push yourself into his desk more, eyes levelled with his. you dare him to say something smart.

“well, your explanation of the six cases in Latin left out the locative, the last one, and there were some problems in the conjugation that the test asked of you.”

“bullshit. show me, if you’re so confident.”

professor geto knows he’s hit a dead-end. he was telling lies, full of it, but he’s enjoying every second of the anger that translates into your features, of the growl in your voice. he leans back further the more you close in on him.

“nothing, right? so tell me, do you hate me that much?”

geto simply laughs, crossing his arms and reminiscing on the many nights he’s spent doing anything but.

“quite the opposite, sweetheart.” the name catches you off-guard for a moment, but your sour face returns soon enough.

“then what the fuck do you think you’re doing, picking endlessly on a student?”

your professor sits forward, prompting you to cower back. you think it’d be good to bring up whatever he’s got going on on camstar.org but you’ll wait to a good moment before you say anything about your trump card, until geto snaps you out of your stupor by towering over you. the sheer difference makes you swallow.

“because i like seeing you flared up and angry and mad.” professor geto surprises you with each second, the nonchalance in which he said it, the stupid, attractive smirk on his face. now’s the time.

you compose yourself, thinking of the best way to phrase this, “you know you’re not entirely safe, either, you know. i could report you with the frequency in which you’re picking on me.”

you point a finger to his chest, thinking you could get him to lay off immediately with this as much as you were hoping he wouldn’t. the attention was unwarranted but not entirely . . terrible, “that wouldn’t look so good on your record, right, Uzumaki-san?”

you relish in the surprise that seeps into geto’s pretty features but it’s a short-lived victory when he goes back into a relaxed state, expression neutral — “so you know.”

“know . . what?” your professor pulls away and walks around his desk, finally in close proximity to you like he’s always wished.

“how badly i want you.” he whispers, but doesn’t go past that, rather letting you figure everything out for yourself.

“‘. . fuck her silly, fuck all of those stupid facts out of her head’, right?” you mumble softly, not admitting to even chō that you had watched that livestream over and over enough to memorise the few sentences. geto wraps an arm around your waist to tug you closer, faces so close that you could just shut him up.

“go on.”

“you want me to go dumb on your cock,” professor geto mutters a correct which undeniably sends a thrill to your core.

“you want to hear me to moan your name.” “—want to hear her moan my name.”

a small smile spreads across his face (even if you left out the most important thing) as he finishes his own sentence with you, eyes clouded over with lust and your scent and he’s positive he can smell your soaked panties from here if he tries hard enough.

“that’s right.”

“sooo . .” by god, you fucking hated the man, but seeing someone stroke their cock to just the thought of you — how could you pass off such a good opportunity? “do you prefer professor geto, or suguru?”

geto groans at his first name usage, setting you on his desk and presses himself into you at the sound of papers flying to the floor, stationary falling to the ground. he can only hope no one walks in. he’s fully hard, loving how your legs naturally spread for him.

“whatever you want, baby.” and after, it’s all history with the way geto crashes his lips into yours, letting you pull at his jacket and shirt, practically ripping open the buttons to see his tattoos that you’re begging to see. slowly, he lets you trace them while he kisses down your neck, roughly pulling your sweater off of you. you have the cutest tits, packaged nicely in your bra which he has no trouble taking off. there’s a small sound that escapes his mouth when he unclasps your bra and your breasts come falling out.

“didn’t tell me you had such a nice pair . .” you giggle.

“yeah, like i would straight up tell my professor that.” with a hand, your hand follows the ink of his dragon that wraps around his body and torso, right down to his happy trail, “but i mean, you get the honour of seeing it now.”

with a squeeze to his bulge, you whisper, “maybe i’ll let you fuck them next time.”

geto lets out a little moan, “fucking minx,” before he latches his mouth onto your nipple, kneading the other greedily. a soft moan leaves your mouth as you knead his erection, a culmination of your combined groans in the quiet office. soon he’s giving attention to the other, a hand trailing down into your panties where he rubs your clit to test the waters, and he smiles into your skin at the way your hand falters and your head hangs forward.

“p-professor . .” it’s clear geto can’t wait, because he pushes a finger into you easily with how dripping wet you are, panties showing a dark patch of your juices. “s— so thick—”

“i know, baby, gotta stretch you out,” a soft pop! is heard as he comes off your nipple before he meets your lips in a sloppy kiss. he shoves his tongue into your mouth the moment he pushes a second finger in and he swallows your moans, letting you feel around his body to dig your nails in — it was just too damn much.

“so— suguru, your f-fingers, they’re so—” even with your protests, your hips grind up against his thick fingers that are pumping in and out of you, taking every last piece of fire in you as you succumb completely.

“what, miss (y/n)?” geto memorises the exact way all your previous blazing words are reduced to mere mewls and whimpers, alongside your pleas for more, more, more.

“i need something—” you whine when he pushes all the way inside, stretching your cunt so well as you clench around him like a vice and sucking him in, “i wanna make you feel good—”

you get at least a little resolve in the time it took you to say that, drunkenly unbuckling his belt before pulling his cock out. his tip is positively leaking, fingers curling instinctively in your pussy and your moans mingle together again.

“c’mon, prof, please?” geto tuts, reluctantly removing his fingers from your cunt which he wish he could spend more of his time in, but gives in to you as you switch positions, pushing him against his own desk. from there you’re going to your knees, marvelling at the cock you’ve watched on your very own screen.

“better than you imagined?”

you roll your eyes, “shut up or i’m blue-balling you.”

geto exhales forcefully, cut off when you put your mouth gently over his tip. you suckle on it like a pacifier, swirling your tongue around the mushroom head and looking up at him through your lashes; the sight is heavenly. the hair from his bun had fallen out, framing his pleasure-filled face, and the veins on his arms pop out so much from how harshly he’s grabbing the wood.

“f-fuck, baby . .” his words are lost once you start bobbing your head, encasing his shaft deep in your mouth as you suck and lick and slobber over his thick cock, using your hands to stroke the places you can’t reach. a choked moan weasels itself out of geto when one of your hands deviate to play with his balls, squeezing lightly at the sack while you continue to lick the underside of his length.

“take me like a slut, don’t you?” geto says breathlessly, fingers going through your hair to gather the strands into a makeshift ponytail, cradling your head to guide your mouth, but he soon starts to thrust into your waiting mouth.

“want me to fuck your dirty whore mouth?” your professor asks and you hate how much it turns you on as he brings you off to let you breathe for a moment. you stick out your tongue, big doe eyes just pleading to be used as your hands anchor themselves down to his belt loops.

“y—yes, prof., give me everything you got,” geto hums, seemingly satisfied with your answer as he taps your tongue with his tip, cock so heavy and thick it makes you whine a little before he shoves it in without warning. the moan that rumbles deep in your throat sends vibrations up his body and he starts a pace immediately.

“that’s it, that’s it—” you breathe through your nose as geto face fucks you, two hands covering the back of your head as he thrusts into your throat. your mouth’s just so damn warm and tight it has geto groaning non-stop while your eyes start to well up with tears. he uses you like a cocksleeve, abusing your throat each time his tip meets with it.

“fuuuckk— yes, yes, your throat’s so—” geto tilts his head back when he buries his cock in you, the deepest he’s ever been and your nose meets with his pubes, the smell of his musk and sweat making your eyes roll back in pleasure. suguru is all grunts before moving again, the gagging, gawking noises filling the small space.

“mmhm— mmf!” you moan around his length, trying your best to move your tongue along the underside of his cock. a hand goes down to quell the growing need of your cunt, slipping a finger or two in.

“dirty girl just can’t think straight when she has a— s-shit— cock in her, huh?”

you hum in agreement, eyes fluttering when you feel his tip twitch in your mouth and geto spills right into your throat with a long moan. your lids flutter close, taking as much cum as you can before coming off with a deep breath. strings of his cum and your saliva connect you to his cock, the lewdness of it all showing clearly in how sloppily you sucked your professor off.

“open.” and you show your tongue still full of his cum, taking the opportunity to lean down to let a ball of spit fall from his mouth. it drops painfully slow to your tongue, closing it only when you hear the rasp of swallow, “good girl.”

“think i’ve kept you waiting for too long, need to be in you,” geto brings you up by your upper arms, propping you up nicely onto his desk where you already start to leak into the wood, “do you want me to be in you?”

“only if you promise to stop picking on me, prof.,” you pout. really, a changed girl once you get some cock, huh?

“but you’re too cute not to bother, baby.” your pout deepens and geto feels a tug on his heart. oh, you were too adorable, knowing you’d kill him the next time he mentions this. he hopes they’ll be a next time.

“i mean it, suguru,” you murmur as he uses his tip to play with your juices, smearing it around your cunt. “treat me like a proper person.”

“can i at least treat you like a slut behind closed doors?”

you bit your lip, he’s asking for a next time, and who are you to reject him?

“whatever you want, professor,” you wiggle your hips along his cock, hoping for some friction which he grants to you with no problem, “use me. treat me like your cum dump.”

geto hisses at your tightness and your words as he bottoms out in you. he’s had your pussy once and already cannot get enough of you, moaning each time he moves in and out of your cunt. your walls hug him so snugly, sucking his cock in endlessly.

“baby, baby, baaaby . . your pussy’s so fuckin’— good—” he grunts into your ears, hips starting to thrust slowly into you. he swears he can see you in your tummy, asking you to look down, “look at how deep i am in you, sweetheart.”

you moan at just how big he was as you glance down, but you’re more focused on the way your pussy spreads for him, the cute veins on his length as he moves in you. you’re leaking so much that it’s effortlessly, the way he rams into you.

“sugu— suguru . . mmfuck—” geto groans upon feeling you rub your clit, your own hips bucking needily into his own as your juices start to drip down his balls. this was everything that he hoped would happen; your features morphed into pleasure, you descending into stupidity just from some dick, feeling your pussy, finally.

“hear yourself?” your professor proposes the question and you’re confused for a moment until he slows down and you whine at the sudden change, brought to attention just how soaking you were. the soft shlick, shlick, shlick sounds take your breath away, as with the translucent sheen of your juices coating his cock.

there, your professor resumes his pace, “hear how fuckin’ sloppy this pussy is for me. listen to her,” your senses are all overwhelmed: by how he hits all your sweet spots, the sweat on your back, your fast-beating heart and you let out a mangled whimper, “yesss . . that’s what i like to hear.”

geto smirks at how you can’t even answer, picking up his pace into a regular one. with his cock buried deep in you, you have no choice but to let your body move with his thrusts, jerking each time his balls meet your ass noisily.

“is this what the little lady needed? just some professor cock to get her to not be so damn uptight!”

“y—yessss . .” you’re delirious, “yesyesyes, suguru!” you squeal when he holds your legs up and pushes your legs into your chest, tongue lolling out at the deepness that he was in you.

“fucking slut,” geto mumbled, hips turning sloppy with fatigue taking over, but your cunt was just too good to stop, “where d’you want me to cum, baby?” he knows you’ll answer how he wants you to, especially after watching his livestream—

“i-inside— inside, pleaseplease,” the circles on your clit are messy, now, chasing your high more than ever, but your pussy is grasping onto him like a vice, prompting groans deep from his throat. “want your cum dripping out of me, prof—”

those words alone has geto shooting his load with a strangled grunt, switching to shallow, quick thrusts to pump you full of his cum. it comes out in hot, thick spurts, filling your insides more and more until it spills out the sides and you follow soon after, whole body convulsing from the intense orgasm you can’t stop shaking violently.

“take it— that’s it, attagirl,” he whines out, stroking his length to make sure you’re getting every last drop out of him, “take all my cum . .”

geto is sure he’s getting old by the way he feels lightheaded, having had to hold onto the edge of the table for a minute — but in that 60 seconds you’ve stumbled off the table and laid your chest over it, perking your ass up where your pussy continues to leak hot, white cum.

your professor takes one good look at your ass, hands going up to knead at them and spreads your cheeks. with his tongue, he eats his cum out of you, making your jerk at the sensitivity.

“oops, i’ve cleaned you up of my cum — guess i gotta give you a couple more loads,” geto props a leg up, eating you out, “it’s only right since my brightest student has suffered so much at my hands . .”

tagging @arminsumi @shidouryusm @suguruplsr @crysugu @slttygeto @suget @sonarspace @marimogf @hannzai &lt;3 ok gn

[gatorbites-imagines]

Kinktober day 15

Stu Macher + edging and/or milking

I always love jock reader, so im running with it again this time, hehe.

On another note, I’ve realised lately how I’ve come to really love dark chocolate, which is funny, cuz I remember hating it as a kid.

Kinktober 2023 masterlist

Stu was splayed out on your bed as you did push-ups in the middle of your room, the carpet under your hands rough under your palms from age and whatever abuse you’d but it through during all the time you have lived in this room.

Since everyone had been ordered to stay home because of the killings happening around town, you hadn’t gotten to go to football practice the few days, so you felt lazy and jittery, like you needed to let off the steam you normally got out during practice. You had no idea how long you’d been working out, as your arms and core burned and sweat ran down your shirtless torso, but you still felt like you needed to do something.

At some point, Stu had wandered into your room. Your parents weren’t home, so you assumed he had just used the key hidden under the plant near the door, like you’d shown him. He had sat at the edge of your bed and watched you work out, rambling about his day and about the killings around town, he had even placed his feet on your back like some kind of stool, in an attempt to get your full attention.

But after a while of not getting it, your boyfriend had groaned obnoxiously and thrown himself back onto your bed, kicking his shoes off in the process and splaying out like a starfish. He quickly grew bored of staring at the posters on your walls or humming different tunes he had heard on the radio, so Stu had dug his upper torso under your bed to look for the dirty magazines he knew you kept there.

They were kept hidden, since most of your teammates wouldn’t react well to you being gay, and magazines filled with shirtless or naked men kinda gave that image. You had been so consumed by your push-ups that he didn’t even notice what Stu was doing, the familiar jingle of a belt not even registering in your head.

It was only when he started moaning that you finally noticed, stretching your arms out to push your upper body up enough to look up at Stu on the bed. A snort left you as you saw him, his pants and boxers pushed halfway down his thighs as he lazily jerked off, flipping through one of your favourite magazines. Of course Stu would start jerking off when he didn’t get attention, but you also didn’t wanna give him the satisfaction, it was a matter of principle.

Instead, you switched to doing sit-ups, making sure you grab a look at your lover every time you sat up, letting your eyes linger as his hips stuttered as he rolled his palm over his tip. “You better not finish that” you hummed as you watched his hips jolt in a way you knew meant he was close.

It was kind of a rule that had appeared between the two of you, if the other was around you didn’t get to cum until the other did it for you or told you. You couldn’t remember what it started but the reminder had Stu whining as he forced himself to let go of his hard prick, clenching his hand into a fist against his abdomen.

As you kept up your exercise, you met Stus eyes over the top of the magazine. He hadn’t actually been looking at any of the pictures, instead he had just been watching you as your muscles flexed, as it was better than anything on the magazine’s pages.

Stu kept touching himself, his noises growing more needy as his length started darkening in colour, as you made sure to remind him to stop when he got close. You couldn’t help but push your exercise longer than you normally would, just to watch as his thighs shivered and twitched, or how his hips jumped off the bed into his hand from sensitivity. He was a leaking mess, leaving his hand glistening and slick.

He let out a warbled moan as you got to your feet, a glimmer of hope appearing in his eyes, begging through his noises and half moaned words for you to help him. The moan turned into a whined sob as you started doing lunges instead, a grin on your face as you kept your eyes glued to him and his twitching hands as he seemed to struggle to even touch himself without bursting.

“Come on Stu, you were so confident earlier” you teased, at this point not even taking the workout serious as you almost didn’t want to blink, not wanting to miss the way Stu stopped the magazine on his chest to wrap both his hands around himself. He was squeezing at his base to keep from cumming, the other hand sloppily twisting around the deep red head, shaking gasps leaving him as his head fell back onto the pillow.

You could see his eyes shut as he clenched his teeth, as when you saw a tear running down the side of his face you finally decided to have some mercy on him. With one last lunge, you finally moved up to the bed, crawling up onto the bedding until you were above where he was aching the most.

Stu looked down at you with wet eyes as you batted his hands away, shooting him a heated teasing look before you leaned in, sucking his dripping tip in between your lips. The noise Stu let out sounded almost like you’d shot him, his back arching off the bed in a beautiful bow as he came, his toes curling and fingers digging into the sheets, his entire body twitching and jolting as he choked and whimpered.

It took a while for him to calm down from his release, and the entire time you just kept him between your lips, neither sucking nor teasing him with your tongue, not wanting to torture your boyfriend more than you already had. It was only when he finally went limp onto the bed that you released him, swallowing the white fluid hed spilled across your tongue as you crawled further up the bed, flopping down beside him.

You leaned in, kissing at his cheek and chin, making Stu whine louder as he shoved at your face, laughing as he made comments about you smelling like a school locker room because you were gross and sweaty. After a few more jokes you got to your feet, immediately catching Stus attention as you pushed off your pants and boxers. “Fine, fine. I’ll go shower, I guess you wont wanna join me, if I stink so bad” you hum, turning on your heel and sauntering towards the bathroom, grinning to yourself as you heard Stu almost fall out of bed to follow after you, more than interested in continuing what you had started.

[bazthefirstborn]

helloooo baz !! can i ask for sub bottom dotty and pantalone hcs 👉🏼👈🏼 (with male reader)

Have a great day!

HEYYYYY HI HI HI - of course I can do that for you lovely! one subby dottore and pantalone comin (hehe) riiiight up~!

also I disappeared again lol I am currently recovering from a surgery, so I should be doing better soon!

smut under the cut minors dni!

tw's: crying, (A LOT) spit, sensory deprevation, rp, bj's, (m reader recieving) just general gay men activities

Dottore:

he's a little skrunkly ngl

but he's MY little skrunkly

would 100% get jealous if his clones touch you

wants alllllll your attention like a lil baby (doesn't admit it)

I feel in my nuggets he would love if you spit in his mouth

his fav position is anything from the back bc he's insecure about his face plz be nice about it

make him cry!!!! sob, hiccup even!!!!

experiment with him, maybe roleplay or bondage

SENSORY DEPREVATION (i am going feral)

loves being bitten and marked

has pretty low stamina, give him funny lil plants to help him with it

please edge him. plEASE. he'll get such a pretty crying face and his voice will break and it'll get all squeaky<33333 hhhhhhhh I'm fine i'm FINE

he likes it rough if you get all soft with him he will cry (he's cute when he cries)

will totally tighten around you when you point out how pretty he is

gets so flustered when you ask him to sit on your face, will scream if you tongue fuck him

Pantalone:

momma didn't raise no bitch but she DID raise me to destroy pretty boys!!!!!

he's one of those elegant bottoms in the pretty lingerie and the fluffy robes and i love him for it

fuck him until his glasses fall off!!!!

likes giving head more than recieving, but loves it when you eat him out

is the prettiest crier, his lashes clump so nicely and he sounds so nice begging for mercy <33

he wants to hold hands with you no matter what he has to touch you to ground himself

so pretty when he gets on top, his hair is so flowy and his tits bounce, top tier

long hair = pullable hair/facefuck helper

he will get fussy if he doesn't at least get a bath when you're done, he hates being dirty

if you plug him up before a harbinger's meeting he'll get all flustered and his legs will be shaky before he even gets done

don't let him finish and just edge him until he's crying and gasping

fin.

a/n: can you tell I like crying lolz hope you enjoy!!!!

[bunnyboilewd]

I dunno, maybe everyone on here saying how much they hate men even in little funny Tumblr speak might be damaging for all the trans men trying to escape reality on the "we love gays" site.

Like I'll be scrolling and see so many m/m ships and in the same scroll see "imagine men, ew." "At least I don't like men."

I know it's hehe funny site, but maybe we could also love men and not cringe at their mere existence.

Trans men, cis men, and masc identifying I love you, I support you and I hope you are loved by those around you.

[broken-glass-puppet]

Helloooooooooooo, how are you doing today? (Btw love your blog ^^ It's amazing!)

Saw that you write about South Park and just really wanted to request 👏👏👏

How about the main four with a taller male reader who looks intimidating (and attractive), but is actually nice? But tho he can fight and ain't afraid to throw hands. He is a sporty guy who is into boxing. He is affectionate and caring, and he has a grunge style. ^^ (romantic)

Hope It's not too much!  😭

OMG YES, also thanks for the compliments, i appreciate it a lot

Im to lazy to write about separate

Headcanons

Kenny: orange

Stan:blue

Kyle: green

Eric:red

The main four

(TW: violence, mentioned sex, blood, homophobia)

Let's say they didn't like you too much at first, I mean yeah you look fine and you turn Heads when you walk but you look like a bully

Well that changed when you were in class, at some point Stan was having problems understanding the work so you asked if you could help him out

"find the x? The fuck? Is right there" "hey dude, you need help ?" You said in a sweet tone of voice, leaning in to see his eyes "...y-yeah sure"

The mother fucker wouldn't stop thinking about you the rest of school

"what's your problem dude, are you gay or some shit?" "You are gay too, c'mon we all know how you check out his butt during PE" "THAT'S NOT FUCKING TRUE!"

Well the most normal two are Kyle and Stan, they do get nervous and all but hey you are nice

Cartman is well...

"i identify as a horse now guys" "wtf Cartman, that's not how it works" "yo guys what are you talking about?" "Cartman identify as a horse" "what?" "Stupid right" "then I just have something to say" you took a moment "yehaw!" Hehe joke

The three are like: 🧍‍♂️

And Cartman is like: 🚶

So yeah a lots of flirting, specially with Kenny

He's the most obvious, he doesn't even try to hide it

And damn you are muscular, no you don't look like a Jojo but you have abs, a little waist and strong arms

"why you as a man have such a little waist? For us men to grab? Are you gay?" "And you as a man why do you have a mouth? To suck dick? Whore" "ew guys, go to a motel or something "

And after some days you start to get a long with them very well

You help them out when they need and you hang out with them a lot but at some point they development a crush on you

Let's say, they fell first and you fell harder

And the moment you started dating them was funny

Some idiot was making fun of Kenny and he was like "okay idgaf"

But you where super angry

"hey, stop bullying my boyfriend or else" "ow what are you going to do huh? You are just a fag, I'm Soo scared" "oh you want to see?" "Of course" and the moment after the idiot in question fell onto the floor with a bloody nose and one his friends punch you in the face leaving you with wounds but you managed to beat him up "who's the next one" silent "i figured out, c'mon Kenny, let's go"

When you get to your home, Kenny called the others and they came super fast

"WHAT WHERE YOU THINKING" yelled Kyle while healing your wounds "i don't know they just...maked me fell angry...and they were insulting Kenny and..." "Y/n i don't give a shit about what were they saying" "i know but...i don't want nobody to hurt you, or you four for that matter" "you called me your boyfriend" "i did?" "Yeah, and I don't mind it, I'm okay but I'm going to be your boyfriend fr" "heh okay " "..." "We all can be boyfriends?" "I'm not gay" "you are" "just for y/n" "then we are boyfriends"

It's a strange relationship, nothing changed to much, you still have that relationship like bros but the physical touch increase a lot, holding hands with them or just little pecks on the check

Kenny is more flirty, grabbing your butt and saying that he didn't do anything or just shoving his head onto your chest and mumbling how he loves your man boobs

And we'll yeah, Cartman is less of a dick but he sure loves you in a strange way

And Stan and Kyle they love you so much

Kenny's parents hate you, they are super homophobic (i hate his parents omg) so when he introduced you to them, they yelled at him, you just looked at them with a death glear and walked away from them

Cuddles ALL.THE.TIME GOD

[amarriageoftrueminds]

maybe it's bc I grew up seeing (and can still see from the outside) how cis men play/joke/fake gayness as a display of domination but yet all somehow knew to avoid actual gayness like the plague (bc the it's so real how cishets manage to know what we are b4 we ourselves do) but I see that exact same "locker room" idea of playing gayness for laughs (usually by violating of sexual boundaries) + treating actual gay love like an unmentionable replicated by the cishets making media

like, look at marvel's iron man thor and gotg movies littered with writing that might nominally be considered "gay" jokes abt men being placed in sexual situations each other (again, often by laughing at the idea of sexual assault/nonconsensual sexualization) but cishet norms don't consider this gay in any real sense. it's the "accepted" way of portraying "gayness" in a way that signals to the audience that it's there to poke fun at the characters and knock 'em down a peg for comedy

This is part of why I rolled my eyes at ppl claiming queerbait at tfatws (completely not knowing what the bait part of the word means). Those "gay" moments in that show were the most classical homophobic dudebro locker room comedy that I've grown to recognize as an extension of the homophobic rough housing culture growing up among cishet boys. Every "moment" was just a Gunn-esque laugh at the male characters being degraded by being put in a position that seems gay against their consent, either by literally falling/rolling into it, by purposeful taunting by a malicious (and shoehorned) character, or literally by the force of the state(state as in governing body). it's meant to be funny in that the cishet culture the comedy comes from dictates that violating men's boundaries with a superficially "homo" act is a way to enforce hierarchy within the group. the jokes come from homophobia (which is why the creators were baffled at the idea of shipping in that show, they recognize the difference between real gayness and their homophobic lockerroom-culture jokes)

This is also why we never see anything even remotely like that between Bucky and Steve, they have genuine love for one another, the same cishet "gay" rough housing culture recognizes that between them it wouldn't be a joke, it'd be actually gay, so they avoided it like the plague. That's why we hardly ever see Bucky and Steve's canon platonic friendship portrayed, it holds actual love for one another that can't be played off by stoicism or homophobic lockerroom-style comedy. They can't do Gunnisms to make it a haha hehe, so the marvel franchise opts to not show the best friends inseparable from playground to battlefield as actual friends. Actual factual, sincere, earnest friendship between men is considered to approximate to gayness by comic book dudebro culture, so they don't show it and then blame gay ppl for "ruining" the platonic make friendships that they were too scared to show because anything more than hooking up with a bunch of interchanging women and meeting up one a year at a bar to talk about the women they've hooked up with is considered to gay by cishet men who still haven't grown out of that homophobic (& misogynistic) locker room culture.

Anon you're so right, and this is also how Tony can be cracking jokes about holding Rhodey's dick in the Avengers movie and no one in the execs room has a gay panic about needing to separate them!

Given that it also had Sharon mocking Bucky for being 'Mr America' tfatws especially seemed to revel in these nasty little homophobic digs. 😥

[queerfortress2]

transman reader x a very pathetic sniper and medic PLEASSEEE im tired of seeing them written as dominant alpha men

HELLO HELLO LETS SEE WHOS UP FIRST

*adjusting glasses* I LOVE THIS!! LITERALLY WITH YOU ON THIS ONE I WANNA DOMINATE SOME MEN (tf2 reference) let's get right into this before i make a fool of myself oh dear — mod medic! <3

TRANSMASC!READER X MEDIC + SNIPER (SEPERATE)

SNIPER

major MAJORRR bi energy from him, i just think he wouldn't mind dating a man. problem at hand i think he's so very bad at dating in general and it being man doesn't make it worse per se, but now he's just 10x more awkward

he's seen hetero dating on TV! but how does it work with another man? he's so awkward i love him...

you WILL have to make most of the moves anyway, I don't really think he's dominant I think he's like. a loser, you feel? like a loser/pos though.

very very touch starved

like if you even hold his hand i think it would be easy to fluster him hes so pathetic

upon reaction i am one of those girlies who think he would throw his hat over his face and murmur something about being 'okay' and that you were just looking at him funny

sure mundy. sure. whatever YOU wanna believe.

other than that hes super physical while alone with you, i dont think much in public but i think if you catch him really tired in bed he would cling to you like a very lanky and large koala.

dont call him out about it he will fold

all in all? i think he desires some softer lovin. like after a harsh days work of being a mercenary i think he just NEEDS it

MEDIC

hehe. guess whos my favourite mercenary

i think hes just gay. sorry even as a woman i can acknowledge thats a man who likes men

probably offered you surgery. please deny it though. like for your own safety i genuinely think its better to just keep them

flustering? mmm. i think its a little harder, especially in a dominating manner. i always see him as a little bit of a control freak, so he would be a little .. stubborn about it

not to say its impossible! because its not impossible but its hard to do!

i'd say be.. harsher with it. sniper likes that softer love i think medic (to fluster him even in the slightest) would need something more out there

PIN HIM TO A DESK, CORNER THAT MAN, FIGH—

ahem

be brash is all im saying

i think while hes working late at night its easier, he isn't expecting anything specific and at that our he probably advises you just to sleep, its only a tad bit easier to deal with him at that our, you can be a little soft with him

he will bring his up later though

not now, no, he still wants to work, but SOON. PREPARE

i?? hope?? thats okay? I DONT EXACTLY* KNOW* WHAT LENGTH MY WRITINGS MUST BE! BUT HOPEFULLY YOU'RE SATISFIED DEAR ANON, TILL WE MEET AGAIN!!!

[buddhamethods]

10 BL Characters I Want Carnally

AKA I'm just a person with two keen eyes and dubious morals when it comes to enjoying media so don't take it seriously, I'm here for a good time.

Thank you @sndrys for tagging me! This was an eye opening experience putting this together. As it turns out I might have a type (ew).

1) Guy from Bake Me Please (2023)

The sole reason for me creating this list! Look, I dropped Bake Me Please almost immediately because it just wasn't for me BUT I've been lowkey watching through my dash. And let me tell you, my fingers gain consciousness and hit reblog everytime this baby's face pops up because...well...LOOK AT HIM. He is beautiful and he should get the guy (hehe get it) in the end idc.

2) Yok from Not Me (2021)

Yok is such a beloved character and for good reason! He is sexy, he is gay, he sets buildings on fire and steals cops' wallets on accident because HOW WAS HE SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT GUY HE WAS STALKING WAS A COP??? I love you Yok, never change.

3) Palm from Never Let Me Go/ OurSkyy2 (2022-23)

The anger I felt for all the injustice and mistreatment our beautiful Palm had to face in this show took literal years off my life. It's rare for me to get this passionately protective over a character and yet here we are, in the Palm Protection Squad headquarters. Even Nueng is on the watchlist!

4) Tonhon from Tonhon Chonlatee (2020)

Not to out myself as an enjoyer of silly goofy times , but I did have fun watching Fish Upon The Sky and Secret Crush On You, so OFCOURSE I thought I would like this one too but GOD was it rough. Did I still finish it? Yes. Did I fawn over PoddKhao pairing and have been quietly praying for some kind of reunion ever since? Also yes. Was I foaming at the mouth barking everytime Tonhon AKA Podd was on my screen? I'm not gonna comment without lawyer present.

5) Tew from My Dear Gangster Oppa (2023)

Speaking of Tonhon Chonlatee...AH! Ai Long Nhai (TC's spiritual prequel of sorts) was sure...something. And by something I mean I saw Meen and decided I will never speak ill of men ever again, feminism quite literally left my body. And then a year later My Dear Gangster Oppa came out and guess what??! MEEN IS THE GANGSTER OPPA! Dreams really do come true, kids.

6) Wen from Moonlight Chicken (2023)

(or Tian from ATOATS or Mueang Nan fron FUTS). Mix...I will eat you. Always so dewy and healthy and sparkly-eyed. But Wen from Moonlight Chicken is something out of the realm of my imagination. The sex appeal? The maturity?? The gentleness??!! Somebody sedate me before I say something I will not be able to justify in court.

7) Vee from Love Mechanics (2022)

He is a pretty bisexual who makes the most abhorrent stupid decisions known to men and then weeps and suffers for them WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED? Once again, is the show flawless or even remotely coherent? Absolutely not. That being said Vee brought me so much joy by being stupid I'm forever grateful.

(also YinWar are so back GO WATCH JACK AND JOKER TRAILER)

8) Prapai from Love In The Air (2022)

To a certain extent I've enjoyed every MAME show I've watched. To do that you need to possess the rare ability called "I abandoned every shred of moral integrity to gawk at hot men". And Prapai? MAN is this bitch hot. Tall dark handsome? Check! Bisexual on a bike? Check! Stubborn and annoying? CHECK!

9) Xiang Hao Ting from HIStory3: Make Our Days Count (2019)

*incoherent wailing and sobbing* IM NOT EXPLAINING SHIT ABOUT HIM LEAVE ME ALONE

10) AlanJeff from Pit Babe (2023)

My newest obsession! I refuse to separate our local senior citizen and his favorite prophetic mechanic. Both of them are hot as shit in their own way. Alan is a sexy dilf with so much weight and responsibility on his shoulders it's a miracle he retained his optimism and youthful awkwardness. And Jeff is a prickly baby-cow-baby-deer eyed baby that is so touch starved it's actually a little funny. SO I GUESS ALANJEFF SANDWICH IT IS.

(don't be shy tag yourselves besties <3)

[viarayy01-blog]

heres some au stuff while i work on a longer story. mainly just for me so ik who everyone is but thought it would be good to post as well.

goldenrock au stuff below the cut bc its a tad long.

Characters:

THESE ARE NOT THE PERSONALITY TRAITS, JUST THE ROLE IN THE STORY

Cassie: Cassidy’s counterpart

Gregory: CC’s counterpart

Cassidy: Cassie's Counterpart

Evan: Gregory’s counterpart

Vanessa: Mikes counter but also Williams?

Mike: Ness’s counter but also Gregory's?

William: Still a serial killer but matches/mirrors Vanny from SB. so also a ness counterpart

Everyone else is the same mostly, don't really change the roles besides the fact that instead of CC (Greg in og) getting possessed by my mimic/glitch trap, it's mike (for GGYthing. Name would be MCL.) And William is still evil. He just follows a similar role to Vanny in sb but isn't a reluctant follower. He welcomes vanni as a parasite. He also is still partners with henry (business) but now they just own fredbears megaplex. Henry is basically the same. Charlie and Mike are close in age and Sammy is here too. And Jeremey. Bc gays. everyones a bit older here so like 16-17. They all work (illegitimately) at the plex as security guards on weekends and afterschool. Cheaper to pay and it keeps them out of trouble (looking at mike specifically). Vanessa is a corpse bc uhh… michael counterpart. She still works at the company as a repairman, but is not seen till later. all 5 missing kids (susie, gabriel, ect) are here as well, and they do indeed end up missing (more on that later)

Now animatronics. 

Goes up to the toys bc i like them best. So the mini music men are the main toys, with mangle as the actual music man. There's only 3 mini’s obviously lmao. Toy Freddy, Toy Bonnie, Toy Chica. But they are very fast and perform with mangle in the arcade. Puppet is a map bot but also sun and moon?. she floats from the celling like moon does with his cord but thats where the similarities end. She gives guests glowing green wristbands that serve as the fazwatch in this universe. its for parents to keep track of their kid, using an app?? But here it is used to track kids to isolate them from each other, and make them go “missing”. Like circus baby if ykwim. Speaking of which, circus baby. I like her. So she's here as well. Remember peepaw afton. Yeah well that's circus baby now. Used to get vanni (parasite little bitch) what she needs to survive, a body of her own. 

And uh funny story. Elizabeth finds out that her dad is possessed by a parasite from the 80’s and her brother is controlled by something similar, so William takes action ig. But wait. I'm not letting her go just yet. Afterall, Evan and Cassidy need a buddy to travel with as well, right? Their 2 extra friends aren't quite enough… So more on that later for spoiler reasons. also no mimic bc i dont even want to delve into that can of worms... closest u get is circus baby. be happy its JUST circus baby lmao

Ok main animatronics. Roxy, Glam Freddy, Spring Bonnie, and Golden Freddy. All the glamrocks are present in the 1980's original diner, but Ness got a bit angry and uhhh... oops Vanni made her kill people haha. so they are. gone. for now. Roxy and Freddy are completely robotic and have no sentience. Not in the traditional sense anyway. But… Spring Bonnie and Golden Freddy are. Got all that fun AI jazz. They don't match up with any of the glamrocks in particular? Just kind of their own character. So obviously spring bonnie gets the glitch thing from MCL William and is trying to kill Cassidy and Evan. Same with mangle and the toys. But GoldF is like glamrock freddy, AS A ROLE. completely diff personality. So he helps the kids. And that's when stuff really goes down.

Yeah. just explanation stuff hehe. left out greg, ness and cassie bc ive already talked about them a lot.

[sneezemonster15]

Hello I know its a dumb question and most gay people switch but who do you think is most likely to be the top or the bottom between Naruto and Sasuke 😂

Ah the question that everyone wants to know the answer of. Well, seems like Kishi prefers NS. And no it's not a coincidence.

Kishi keeps (or used to at least) track of the fandom which is pretty common for creators who amass a significant fan following, as in who is the most popular character and why, who isn't and for what reasons, and I am positive he not only knew about the popular ships but he also played around it, trolling everyone. Lol, that jerk. Regardless, he certainly drew and wrote Naruto as an impish punk ass troublemaker. And Sasuke as the dignified, sensual and stylish avenger. Quite a lot of canon art consistently portrays Sasuke as the feminine counterpart to Naruto's masculine energy. Since they also represent yin and yang, yin represents feminine energy while yang represents masculine in Chinese philosophy. The SNS tropes also depict Naruto as the hero and Sasuke as his heroine is this classic and epic love saga. Also, Sasuke is designed after the archetype of a bishounen, who are written as typically lusted after by men to possess. Bishounen archetypes are typically bottoms. From what NS characterization I have read or seen, it is not always entirely accurate. A lot of NS fanfics are also pretty dissatisfying, and some of them, even the popular ones, are pretty inaccurate and poorly written. But most SN fics are more overtly shit. All in all though, I have seen NS characterization portray SNS much more accurately than SN. SN theories anyway are pretty rubbish. What with their faulty sun and moon allegory and the filler shit they rely on.

This top bottom thing honestly has a lot of pointless mystique about it. It's not that mysterious. Or even important.

It's not like Sasuke is some delicate twink and Naruto is some bear. In the manga itself, neither Sasuke nor Naruto come off as overly masculine or overly feminine, they are still very young, still coming into their adulthoods. They are still in the process of self discovery. In part one, Naruto is more childlike and Sasuke is like a jaded adult already, led by trauma, although Naruto relieves a lot of his tense lines heh. In part two, Naruto is adulting but his childlike spirit breaks out now and then. While Sasuke acts like a femme fatale around Naruto a lot of times. He is also quite bossy and take charge. Which annoys Naruto, but it's just an act by that time. He not so secretly enjoys it. Hehe. Which does remind you of other couples, as in how Shikaku's wife is bossy but Shikaku likes it secretly. Or how Kushina is bossy and take charge but even though henpecked Minato is sometimes exacerbated, he still loves it on Kushina. He adores her, just like Shikaku adores his bossy wife. Similarly, post Shippuden, it feels like Naruto is the henpecked husband who adores Sasuke, and even though he sometimes complains and makes funny faces at Sasuke's bossiness, he secretly loves it and simply won't have it any other way. Sasuke also knows that he can be himself around Naruto as much as he wants and Naruto would like him just as he is. He also knows that Naruto himself has a good head on his shoulders and both respect each other's abilities and belief systems.

[dramallamas]

The (unserious) notes of Beyond Evil. Episode Three Edition

Previous Episode || Next Episode

Cant wait to psychoanalyse this episode later with the scriptbook!

Jinmuk je te deteste dont even dare feel sad you monster

that shot of Juwon lazing on his sofa im down bad

He has nice handwriting tho

Honestly when is this man not thinking about Dongsik

The fly jumpscared me bc of my headphones

Dongsik you bastard (affectionately)

He is not ok rn

Juwon eavesdropping was me and my flatmate last night trying to find out the drama

The camerawork in this show is beautiful omg

Dongsik has no right to look this fine rn tho

Oop spotted!

Jihwa knew both of them were at the station lol

And bada bing bada boom we are in the recording room

And theyre off and Jihwa is so done

Juwon is so like WTF with this whole thing.

If looks could kill Dongsik would be dead 💀

why at 5am?! WHY WERE YOU UP AT 5AM?!

Bro Juwon doesnt hold back

Dongsik <3

Juwon could murder im sure of it. He has it ij him.

I like watching the gay men fight… because its fun :)

THE ONLY TIME I WILL AGREE WITH HAN KIHWAN IS RN “What a nut job. I like him [Dongsik].”

Juwon pissing off Kihwan is just so great at all times.

Theyre gonna find the wrong body and blow this case even bigger

Dongsik again <3 the onlt dilf of my life tbh

My heart breaks for him though. He masks a lot if pain

“What if I ran into older Yuyeon on the street, but failed to recognise her. That worries me a lot…” 💔

Fellas is it gay to stare at another mans smiling photo for a long time whilst in your room?

Juwon you have always been a crafty bitch and I respect that

YJG is a brilliant actor he is a master at subtle emotions which makes him one of the most expressive characters in the show

YAY you found a phone

Bad news for Juwon its Geumhwas phone that has his number.

Mate ur laughing like a maniac like dongsik does. You two arent as different as you think.

But my god you like to jump to the wrong conclusions

Watching the scene with nam sangbae and dongsik makes me cry but i cant because im in the living room with my flatmates. And the score in the background just 😭

Me 🤝 Dongsik : Laughing to hide pain

Man will stay in work just for Juwon

They back and forth in every scene like its all they do.

Mf going on about the culprit always returning to the scene and here comes JINMUK AHDKFMSP FORESHADOWING WE MISSED

Part of me think that Dongsik is suspicious of Jinmuk atp.

If you told them that they would be so close by the end of the series they would be fucking disgusted.

Oop juwon getting interrogated.

Juwon pausing before adding 요 at the end of his sentence like bro you are forgetting your respect conjugation

oh shit juwon not looking good for you is it.

"Given his nature, there is no way he [Juwon] would get involved in a crime" HYEOK YOU DONT EVEN KNOW-

Hyeok became his tutor in 2010... when JW was 17. does that mean that he helped JW in Korea rather than britain? or the tail end of britain onwards.

Hyeok you are such a kiss-ass

Do Haewon 🤢 she is so fake i hate it (which is the poing ig lmao)

LEE CHANGJIN. hes so funny for a bad guy

Jeongje is so frustrated with his mum (same)

Juwon is this close to slapping Hyeok at times.

aliens? rude much kihwan (what did we expect)

and there goes juwon loosing his cool.

annoyingly kihwan makes some points even if its for self centered gain. still hate kihwan dw

bro standing outside as ppl talk about him like 🧍

And then the eye contact between him and dongsik god having a whole silent conversation

Nice recovery juwon.

Them being nice to each other? NOT THIS EARLY BOIS

And boom personal space who? They dont know it.

Dongsik telling Juwon to go to therapy lmaooo

Juwon grabbing Dongsik probably became a… different thing later on yk? Hehe

This episode is basically Juwon and his terrible no good very bad couple days.

Bro you need to hike/walk more Juwon how are you already sweating.

You make think you have him, but nope he has you.

JUWON BREAKS INTO DS BASEMENT PART ONE HERE WE GO

The tiny bloodstain ofc. He def left it deliberately somewhat

And i am so hyped for episode four because of the incoming moments.

Juwon this isnt the victory you think it is trust me

see you all next episode! bye ^^

[jennyandvastraflint]

Xena Reactions S2Ep11

I love nature shots. Beautiful. They're so sweet, walking CLOSE

Gabrielle fell

CLAMS

She'll nomm them. XD

.... 👀 "Clams"

Lots of sparsely dressed women running, and men being shitty

GOOD ON XENA FOR HITTING THEM

GAY MERCHANT!!!!!!

"Xena :D"

Beauty contest???

"A feeble excuse for men to exploit and degrade women" real

This dude is so.. 😂 He's a funky gay man tho.

Yes Gabrielle you tell him!

XENA GOES IN sjdhfd

Gabrielle's OUTFIT

"Watch it, clod" PERIDOT!? GREEN DORITO GEM!?

Noooo, that was... Oop

"I find your concern sooo touching"

Please these men are all... 😑

Gabrielle fuck yeah. What is that accent tho

All those women being exploited...

Oop she has a scar.

Did they lock Xena in... She's gonna climb out

"unusually perceptive" MY ASS. GABRIELLE IS SUPER SMART

A BLONDE WIG!? REALLY? 😂

Whomst is sneaking and stealing Xena's armour?

Salmonis being a shittt

A TRANS WOMAN? An enby? We love it. They're sweet.

"Who cares about the girls" the dudes SUCKKKK

"The power, the passion!"

Did someone rip her dress?

The winged costumes are cute

Yeah well that performance was

MAKE HIM BEG. MAKE HIM APOLOGISE. HEHE

These hobbies sound kinda... Lame

"HER LOCAL HESTIAN VIRGINS" fuck yeah! Asexual rights

"This means war" snfjdsh

"Honey I'm no princess, I'm a queen" YES YOU ARE!!! 🥰

I hope Miss Artiphys wins, she (they) are so sweet

"I don't understand why you don't sing" AHAHA GABRIELLE WANTS TO HEAR XENA SING

Urgh those men SUCK

"What is it with you three?" literally, Gabrielle

Damn she'll fix it

This woman is kinda sus

She's amazing. They're all traumatised and hope to get away or something better

"What about your feelings, don't they count?" YES AAAAA

I love this. Women support women.

Beautiful nature shots.

Well this sounds like someone manipulating... Sawing

Wow they literally do not care so long as she's pretty...

"Whatever that song you just played was"

Miss Artiphys is beautiful

A snek. A DANGER noodle

UH OH

She saved her but shoved her aside...

A THONK

Whoooo's doing all thissss

I FUCKING CALLED THAT SHE'S SUS

Also him.

"I'd stake my life, where in fact, I'm staking yours" okay that's kinda funny

AHAHA SHE TIED them up so they heard the confession

"Don't hate me cos I'm pretty🥺" sjfjdhd

I hope Miss Artiphys wins. XD

OMG YAYYY SHE QUITS BC XENA INSPIRED THEM

YAY THE ONE DUDE BEING LIKE "She wants to quit, shut"

Let's ignore Salmonius's look. But look at them so cute! So glad they won!

MISS Artiphys KISSED XENA???

Gabrielle is like O_o My gf??

Love the kiss tho XD

I'm... the "She's a man?" "Yup." Ehhh... Not amazing but it's a show by cis people in the 90s. Apart from this? Amazing. Like, maybe Miss Artiphys is a drag queen. Or genderqueer or a hermaphrodite? Greek mythology? Trans woman? Queer. Miss Artiphys is queer. And it doesn't matter. Because: "Beauty is beauty." as Xena said

[eastgaysian]

tg was fun when it was some people who picked up on a weird dynamic between the most boring white men in the world. like it was funny it was half-joking. now its the yaoi bait that hooked a bunch of taylor swift stans who need a tomgreg microdose every fifteen minutes to pay attention to the story

LMFAO honestly though 💀 obligatory disclaimer that i'm bitching on my own blog etc etc it's Shows and Posts Online. me being annoyed by something is not a moral indictment i'm just a hater and i try to cultivate my online space to be enjoyable. i get easily irritated by perspectives on succession that feel reductive or like deliberately putting horse blinders on, which happens with a lot of fans, but it feels most common or most egregious with tg posting. probably because at this point a lot of fans are tg fans specifically and also because the generalized approach to 'shipping' tends to be limited in focus. whole other can of worms.

anyway it's just like. poisonposting was funny. roadrunner wile e coyote posting was funny. i do not think u need to be themes and narratives posting all the time. i love to hehe and haha. It's just fucking bonkers to me to watch a show and talk about it and say you enjoy it and completely refuse to engage with like. The core thematic ideas and basic plot of it. Why are you talking about yaoi a man has died please put your dick away. Yes sorry the episode is going to be about business and politics in the business and politics show.

it's also insane to me to take away the elements of a character dynamic that are genuinely funny and interesting and unique in favor of making featureless white boy pair #187936782 to be copy pasted into whatever aus and tropes migratory slash fandom is obsessed with at the moment. and then getting really mad about '"''""queerbait''""''" like look me in the eyes right now. Write me a 5 page essay about the significance of greg's reference to prison rape in his bathroom scene in return and what it reflects about how succession depicts sexuality. Quickly.

they suck. they're weird and bad. tom is only interested in (can only justify) being gay when it's imbalanced and coercive. greg is a spineless self-interested slimeball who's too stupid to be truly altruistic or effectively malicious. that's what makes it fun. please stop acting like it's not weird and bad. it's not not not not romantic but more importantly it's weird and bad and funny on your tv screen. That's what tg swag is about