#his outstanding Miller <3

[schmweed]

[taeslarityy]

outage ༄ joel miller one shot (18+)

-> pairing: no-outbreak joel miller au x female curvy reader

-> word count: 4.3k

-> summary: after a citywide power outage, you're left to deal with the scorching texas heat. until, the well-respected neighborhood dilf — joel miller — lends you a more than generous hand.

-> warnings/tags: sarah is 10/11 so joel had her a bit older, power outage, texas heat, yes this is a warning because its not a joke, reader has a cat!!!, age gap (reader is 24, joel is late 40s), curvy/mid/plus size reader, brief fatphobia, reader has self-image/parent issues + is a lonely gal, fluff, SMUT (18+), unprotected piv, creampie, oral + fingering (f!recieving), squirting, body worship, brief ass play, daddy kink, big ole tits, spanking, spit kink, praise kink, a bit of belly bulge, cockwarming, pet names galore (darlin, sweetheart, baby, _ girl), joel has a huge dick (not canon!)

-> a/n: hi hi! i have been so anxious to begin writing again and currently have some wips that i am just not confident with. so when i saw the lovely @hellishjoel post her #hotdilfsummerchallenge, i was positive i wanted to join in! such a pleasure to be involved in this — thank you kylee for creating such a fun way for this community to get involved! as a curvier woman, i wanted reader to reflect that. because... joel miller is a handsy mf and loves to just grab himself some wide hips, thick thighs and phat tits <3 but ofc, this is can be for various body types. please please please, leave your thoughts and even constructive criticism! <3 DILF NEIGHBOR JOEL, YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS!!!!

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. 

You release a groan of annoyance as the visual of your TV, coffee table lamp and humming of the refrigerator all flicker off into silence. The frills on your throw-blanket settle, as the ceiling fan no longer produces the small gusts of wind that have caused you to be rather chilly on this hot, humid and rainy summer night. 

When you made the courageous decision of moving across the country for a new teaching opportunity in Austin — you were never informed on the true brutality summertime unleashed onto Texas residents. More-so, you really had nothing to do but be caged up in the comfortable AC of your home. You’ve been here for roughly 14 months and the only "friends" you’ve made have been the 28 fourth graders you had the pleasure of teaching last school year. Tragic. 

Your coworkers, did not handle your arrival pleasantly. Young, beautiful, freshly-educated and determined. That’s what your grandmother referred to you as when you called her sobbing after your first week. Informing her that the seasoned teachers won’t even bat an eye at you, and when they do it’s a look of disgust. Whispering amongst one another. Like you were in middle school again, trying to befriend the popular girls. 

“I was foolish to think things could be different for me down here, so stupid of me.”

“Now listen to me, you are the most intelligent woman I know. More than anyone in this family. Bullies like that, it stems from an unknown jealousy and overbearing insecurity. Don’t let a few sour grapes ruin this outstanding career for you. Your students adore you already, and so do I. Just continue to be yourself and if that isn’t enough for them, so be it.”

Your grandmother always knew how to make you feel better. She had been instilling your own sense of confidence since you were a little girl. The only adult in your life to do so. If only her words were enough. Your coworkers just never let up. After overhearing them gossip about you during lunch break, you gave up your attempts indefinitely. 

“She really thinks she deserves a place here?”

“Look at her back rolls in that shirt…”

“She really needs to put that sandwich down.”

“Why is she so quiet? It’s freaky, honestly. No wonder she’s always alone.”

You’re not a stranger to being alone. You practically have been your entire life. Your parents never really bothered to form a genuine relationship with you, always so focused on your younger sister. She was the prettier, thinner, more impressive version of you. You have only had one best friend throughout your long 24 years on this earth. She was smarter than you and moved away from the timid small town you shared in Northern Maine, choosing an out-of-state university. So, being alone was a familiarity. You have made peace with it. But being lonely — that’s a whole other ball-park. 

The booming thwack of thunder startles you from your thoughts. Your sweet calico boy leaps from your warm lap and scurries under the dining table — tail puffed in fear. “Milo... it’s okay,” you whisper. He just gleams at you with his jet-black saucer eyes. Even you don’t believe your own words. You are not used to storms like this, and you didn’t really prepare. You read some articles online about stocking up: having plently of batteries, candles, non-perishable foods. Yet, you didn’t do any of that. 

Rubbing away the moisture from your damp upper lip — the heat inside your home already becoming unbearable. Deciding on a whim, you can head to a nearby hotel for the night. Unsure how long you will be without power and don’t wish to succumb yourself or your cat to the searing temperatures of the night. 

The rain has slowed down, as you feel the soft patter on your umbrella. Throwing your purse and water bottle in the front seat, you begin to dread unpacking all this stuff when you get to the hotel. Bags, cat litter, cage — scrutinizing yourself mentally and deciding you better fucking prepare for the next storm. 

“Where ya headin’ sweetheart?”

Your heart jumps at the deep smooth Southern voice that fills your thoughts at night. When your hands would find their way in between your quivering legs. Throughout the day. Pretty much all the time.

Joel Miller is the only person in this town that has ever filled the lonely void you can never seem to fill. When you moved to the quiet suburban street, he was the first to come greet you as you struggled to pull your mattress out of the U-Haul. Immediately lending a hand, and proceeding to lug all of your remaining boxes, furniture, miscellaneous items into your new home. 

“Pretty lady like you, shouldn’t have to lift a single finger.” He remarked when you you blushed and assured him you could handle the rest, not wanting to be a burden. Even though the sweat dripping down your back was apparent and 5 minutes prior you had no idea how you’d be able to unpack the remainder of the truck. He then assured you — there was no way in hell you were being a burden. Words that were a rarity. 

Later that afternoon, he invited you for dinner at his home. You met his lovely daughter, Sarah. Where everyone learned that you were her new school teacher. What were the odds? 

Following that, seeing Joel was frequent. From parent-teacher conferences, backyard barbecues for the neighborhood, or even small intimate dinners with Sarah at each others homes. Sarah would even spend the night at yours on occasion. When Joel had a late night at the construction site, or when she just needed some girl time. You adored that little girl, and vice versa. 

You also adored the fuck out of Joel. 

So when you looked up at his porch, finding him in nothing but a pair of plaid pajama pants.. your throat went dry. His tanned skin gleamed softly from the street light — little speckled freckles adorned his waist in various spots. And that darkish grey hair on his chest and fat of his lower tummy that flowed underneath his pants. Your brain fuzzy at the thought of your face pressed against it as you swallow his cock. 

But you were not a fool. Joel would never express an attraction towards you. A man like that? He deserved the perfect woman. 

“Darlin’?” He speaks again, a bit louder. Disturbing your wandering thoughts. 

“I- I was gonna head to a hotel for the night, my house is too hot already. And I don’t want Milo to be uncomfortable.” 

Joel’s eyes wander down your body as you explain — the plush jiggle of your tits in that small tank. Nearly spilling out. Slightly damp from the rain or humidity. The chub of your tummy spills slightly from your leggings. A sight that makes his cock swell unbearingly. An act that occurs more often than not when he sees you or even thinks of you for the countless minutes of his day. 

“No way. Not gonna let ya drive in this weather. Plus, most hotels nearby are gonna be overbooked. I got the generator up n’ working, got the spare room too. Your stayin’ over.” 

“No! No, Joel. I can’t.”

“N’ why not?” His hands have found his way to his hips, popping a knee out and giving you that classic dad glare. Not angry, but confused as to why you’re even protesting when he’s already decided. 

“I don’t want to intrude and I have Milo. You and Sarah are allergic.”

“Sarah left yesterday to stay with her mom in California for the rest of the summer. Besides, Milo loves me. I can handle a runny nose as long as I know the two of ya are safe.” 

To this, your stomach nearly flips inward on itself. You’ve never been alone with Joel in his home. Not for this long. The few times you’ve come over to help him with dinner before Sarah got home from soccer practice, have always been excruciating. Staring at him without worry. Watching his muscles flex through his t-shirts. Big hands chopping vegetables and plating food. His hand lightly touching your waist when scooting by. 

There’s no possible way you can survive a night in Joel’s home. 

But, he’s already grabbing his umbrella and walking over to you. He grabs your stuff from the car and tells you to go grab Milo. So, you do.

Joel slips on a t-shirt after he put your stuff in the spare room, disappointedly enough. You nearly told him to keep it off, but held your tongue. You made yourself comfortable at the island barstool as you typed up some early lesson plans, Milo at your feet. 

He patters over to Joel who is now leaning against the counter, brushing against his leg. He then leaps onto the granite and purrs against Joel’s arm. 

“Psst! Milo get do-“ you beg, embarrassment coloring your cheeks. 

“S’ okay, sweetheart. He’s not botherin’ me,” Joel attempts to settle your nerves. Petting Milo’s soft fur and scratching under his chin, that special spot all cats love. “Can I get you anythin’ to drink?” He nods towards the coffee he’s brewing. 

“Coffee would be nice, thank you.” You beam at him. Joel’s heart skips a beat every time your cheeks puff up ever so slightly when you smile at him. It’s something he swears is the most endearing thing about you. Of course, he’s only ever shared that with his daughter. Who begs her father to just take her favorite teacher on a date already. 

Joel grabs some sugar and oat milk from the fridge, your favorite. He learned from the few breakfasts you guys had shared. A bit of sugar and a nice gulp of milk softens the dark roast color in the mug, he slides it over to you as he grabs his plain black coffee. 

“You remembered!” You giggle slightly at the Number 1 Dad title that adorns the mug, taking a sip. You moan at the taste, exactly how you like it. 

“Of course I did, darlin’.” You almost hate how easily those pet names roll of his tongue. You summed it up as his southern hospitality, figured he calls any woman those special names. “So, you ready for this new school year?”

An icky feeling settles in your stomach. The thought of returning to the painful and toxic work environment you can only escape when you’re with your students.

“Not without my Sarah girl,” you swiftly change the subject towards the one person he can talk hours about.

He smiles proudly at her name. 

“Ya know, she still all mad that you wouldn’t flunk her so she could have another year with ya.” Both your laughs quickly fill the empty house. 

“Well, even if I tried to, that girl is too smart for her own good. She should skip a grade in my opinion.” You state, and you’re truthful at that. Sarah Miller is as intelligent as she is quick-witted. 

“Yeah, she gets it from me.” At that you roll your eyes playfully. Typing something up before closing your computer and taking another sip of coffee. “Although I love boastin’ over her, I guess I meant are you excited to go back? They treat ya good there?” 

Joel watches the color drain from your soft skin. Realizing he touched somewhere that might be too personal. Too raw. “M’ sorry sweetheart, shouldn’t have asked.”

“No- no uh, you’re fine. Um, honestly? No. I’m not excited. The staff there aren’t exactly the kindest bunch.” You confess, slight unease crawling over you. 

Joel’s eyes scrunch in confusion. Mind blank on how the kindest soul he knows, could be surrounded by complete opposite. “Whatcha mean?”

You sigh letting the anxiousness settle a bit before speaking again, “they hate me. I don’t even know why, really? I have tried my hardest to get them to accept me but nothing seems to work. Whether it’s jabs at my appearance, teaching style, they’re never satisfied.” Your eyes are burning slightly, haven’t confessed this burden you constantly carry to anyone. “If it wasn’t for your daughter and my class, and… you.. well, I think I wouldn’t have made it through. I try to be strong, I try to be everything that people expect from me but it’s just so hard, Joel.” At that, the fat tears begin to stream down your face.

Joel was frozen in shock. Or maybe anger. Protectiveness. He wanted to hurt the people who made you feel like this. The least deserving of any pain. He sets his mug down and snatches you in his embrace. Holding your head with his hand, stroking your back with the other. He lets you sob almost uncontrollably into his firm chest. 

“I just hate being so alone.” You whisper, clutching onto him. You can’t even be embarrassed anymore, you’re so overthrown by his scent, his comfort. Comfort you’ve not felt in so so long. 

Joel kisses your temple softly, "promise you're not alone, sweet girl." He nudges your head to look up at his own sorrowful expression. His thumb running over your full lips, a bit swollen from your teeth biting down on them in an attempt to muffle your sobs. "So beautiful." He murmurs as he leans down to place a kiss on your left cheek, his lips skim over yours before he places another on your right.

Joel just barely hears the whimper from the back of your throat when that feather light skim happened. He leans back half an inch, staring into your glossy eyes. "Tell me not to, and I'll let you go upstairs and get some rest. Tell me, sweetheart."

It feels like a whole minute passes by. The soft patter of the rain, the smell of coffee beans from each others breath, the same slow breathing that overwhelms the little space between you both.

Desperation.

Your fingers tighten on his shirt, "don't let me go upstairs, Joel."

Joel smashes his mouth into yours, his guttural groan flying into your soft whimpers. The softness Joel expressed a moment ago is long gone. This kiss is messy, teeth-clanking, tongue inside your mouth. Like he wants to devour you from the outside in. He releases your lip with a pop.

He threads his thick fingers through the base of your hair and yanks it back gently, tongue on your neck. Biting the skin there. "You're so soft, baby. Just need me to mark ya up, is that right?"

You nod as hard as you can despite his harsh grip on your locks.

"I need you to use your words, sweet girl. Let me know what you're thinkin'."

"Everything you do is okay. I want more. I need it all. Please."

"Oh baby, cm'ere," he wraps your lavish thighs around his waist and hoists you into his arms. Easily. Like you're just the most delicate thing he's ever held.

As he walks to his bedroom, you smile into his neck. Arms wrapped over his shoulders, hand rubbing ever so softly at his greying curls. You bite at the skin under his ear and he gives your ass a huge squeeze. Groaning at how his big hands barely hold all the meat there. He couldn't wait to touch and gnaw at this body he loved.

At the foot of his bed, he taps your leg as if telling you to get down. You stand in front of his massive overbearing figure, staring up at him lustfully. You grab the bottom of your compression tank top and pull it over your head, revealing your unsupported chest. Your heavy tits fall a bit.

"My god," Joel falls to his knees in front of you, face nearly level with your pebbled nipples. Both his hands grab a fistful of each, rolling them in his palm. Your sweet noises fill the room and he swears he might've just came in his pajama pants right there. He takes his teeth and bite at the fat above your leggings, licking and sucking at a sensitive part of you. Literally and figuratively.

Joel abandons your chest to yank your leggings and panties down in one move, coming face-to-face with your prickly oozing pussy. He can't restrain himself much longer, spinning you around he pushes you down into his mattress.

He spreads your ass open with both hands, the chub of your lips open ever so slightly as the slick between them strings together.

"Perfect cunt." That's when you feel the chill of liquid spat right onto your puckered hole, dripping down to your clit. He leans in, tongue catching the tangy mixture of your slick and his saliva, right on your throbbing clit.

You screech into the sheets, so turned on from his actions. As he licks up to dip his tongue into your hole, one hand that's holding you open sneaks up your back, to your neck and yanks your head up.

"Nu-uh, let me hear you, baby girl." He demands as he pauses to throw his shirt off as fast as possible — not wanting to leave your cunt for too long without the warmth of his mouth.

He sloppily makes out with your cunt as it clenches and unclenches under his tongue, his beard prickling at your skin. Like he wants your scent all over him for as long as possible.

"Ohh daddy, more more," you whisper hazily, hand reaching back to grab his head desperate to have him as deep as possible.

Joel stops as he processes your choice of title. "What was that, darlin'?"

You freeze at his serious tone. Just now realizing what you've called the man. "Oh my god, I'm s-" Joel grabs your wrist and pins it against your lower back — thick middle and ring finger hooking into you with no warning. Your wetness aiding in the rapid slide of them.

He spits on your puckered hole again and abandons your wrist to land a harsh smack against your ass.

"Only dirty girls say that word, baby. Are you daddy's dirty girl?" He edges you on as he spanks you again on the opposite side. Hard. Unsparing. A side of Joel you've never seen. And oh, does it make you feel that coil tightening within you.

"Mmmm yes yes 'm your dirty girl, daddy!" You groan loudly, eyes swelling with fresh tears. But not tears of pain from earlier, pleasure.

Joel's fingers fuck into you harder, thumb now rubbing at your clit as he leans forward to prod his tongue at your asshole. "Cum for me, my nasty sweet girl. Drench my face. Let me taste you even more." He halts his fingers knuckle deep, hooked inside your cunt as he presses into that spot on repeat. Like he's stroking it out of you.

That's all it takes for you to silently scream as you squirt all over his lower beard covered face and your thick inner thighs, that nearly squish his head from how hard you're coming. Joel just keeps himself situated, never letting up. Allowing you to completely let go and rut back into him, telling him you need more.

"Thaaat's it, my good fuckin' girl.” He praises as he kisses your cunt and ass, he leans over your face capturing your lips in a kiss so messy and depraved. “Open that mouth.” Spitting roughly onto your tongue with a groan as you taste your sweetness that he knows he will forever be addicted to. No chance of recovery.

He ruts his thick bulge into your ass as you whine needly.

"Really want you to fuck my face, now." You beg, hand reaching down to grope him through his loose pjs.

"Mmmmm," he murmurs as his hips keep rutting into you. "Tonight is about you, baby. M' gonna stuff your tight cunt so fuckin' deep you'll feel it in your throat, don't worry." And with that promise, he releases himself, throbbing cock slapping against his lower tummy. You flip onto your back just to see it and your eyes widen at the sight before you.

You always knew it was huge just from perception, but god. It's thicker than your wrist, and looks like it would prod into your cervix. Painful even. Joel senses the worry on your face as he pushes your legs back against your chest. Admiring the way your stomach folds into itself, soft roll after roll. And the thickness of your inner thighs lays heavy. He just wants to get down and feast on you again but he might die if he doesn't feel you wrapped around him.

"You're in charge here, sweetheart. Understood?" He explains as he rubs his fat cock head up and down your swollen slit — notching on your opening with every downward stroke.

You nod slowly, peeking down at the monster between your legs once more. He squeezes your ankle, subtly reminding you to vocalize.

"Yes daddy, I understand."

"Good." And with that, he pushes into your fluttering hole. Your eyes roll back immediately, head thumping onto the soft duvet. He pushes in deeper, barely halfway in and he sees your feet and eyes scrunch a bit. It almost feels like he could rip you apart. Maybe it's because you haven't been fucked in a hot minute — or maybe it's just that Joel is so fucking hung. More than any guy you've slept with.

“Deep breath for me, sweetheart.” He soothes you, as soon as he sees your chest fall — he slams the rest of the way in. Hips flush with the back of your thighs. Cock fully sheathed in your warm soaked cunt. Heavy brimming balls pressed against your little puckered hole. “You feel so damn good. Dripping for me.” Joel’s eyes close at the feeling of you hugging him so tight. He suddenly forgets the feeling of any other woman he’s pleased. Utterly devoted to you from here on out.

When he pulls out all the way to his fat tip — it notches on your opening. Like he has to put in that extra effort to fully remove himself from you. But he doesn’t, and starts fucking into you fully. Never half way, never pulling completely out.. but always making sure he reaches the end of you.

“Da- daddy oh, harder please.” You plead, squeezing his forearm at the overwhelming feel of him nudging your cervix with every thrust.

That confirmation of pleasure is all Joel needs to push your legs back even more — ankles by your head — and began a brutal relentless pace. Grabbing a fistful of your jiggling tit and messy hair, he pulls your head up so you can watch how he ruins you for anyone else.

“Ya see that, see how swollen your gettin’ already?” Joel questions as he holds your head perfectly to observe the slight lifted pudge on your tummy. Paired with the way his coarse hair rubs against your swelled clit — it’s a drool worthy sight.

“Cus’ your so big, Joel.” You sigh, eyes fluttering from the primal force he’s using on your body.

A smug grin flicks across his face at the view. Mind consumed by the most perfect woman. Eyebrows turning inward, the little lines between them deepening as you try to comprehend all the emotions in this moment. Removing his hand from your head, he finds your clit and swipes it upward. Over and over. Leaning down, he sucks as much of your breast into his mouth as humanely possible. Tongue flicking the pebbled area, coercing your orgasm from you. “Cum with me, baby.” His muffled command shoots straight to your filled core.

As he feels you spasm around his thickness, he stills balls deep. “There it is, baby…” Spilling his cum inside your warmth. Plugging you, keeping you full of him. Joel relaxes his body against yours, finding your mouth to kiss you gently. Sweaty foreheads against one another. Joel goes to push off of you, his comforting body heat about to be ripped away.

"No! Wanna feel you longer, please."

Your protest makes Joel's heart surge. "Of course, sweet girl." Wrapping his large arms around you, he flips you both so that your soft plush body lays above him. The new angle makes his spent cock nudge a bit deeper, you both moan at the faint squelch of his cum overflowing your cunt. "You're so perfect," he mutters.

Smiling into his full chest, you leave a swift kiss. "So are you. Thank you for this. For.. everything."

Joel's hands finds your back as he begins gentle strokes onto your supple skin, his head resting atop your own. "Thank you, darlin'. I want you to understand something, you might just be the finest thing that ever happened to Sarah and I. Y'know, she didn't really want to see her mom. Never had the best relationship with her. She just wanted to spend the remainder of the summer havin' ya over everyday to swim and all. That girl admires you more than anyone."

Eyes foggy, you shift to gaze up at him. "And what does her father think?"

Joel pauses briefly, rich brown orbs beaming into yours. "Think she's damn right. She didn't want me to tell you this, but she left so I could have some alone time with you — take ya out. Scolded me sayin' by the time she's back, we better be together." He laughs at the thought, you join him. Picturing that 4'9 ball of fire lecturing her father on the rules of dating.

"So, you're asking me out Miller?" You question with a heavy hopeful heart.

"Should've done it forever ago, darlin'." He confesses, placing a delicate kiss on your temple.

And with that, you place your head back onto the warm chest of the man you've craved your entire life. Realizing, ever since that day where he first greeted you with that sultry gentleman voice — you were never truly alone.

thank you truly for reading! let me know your thoughts below or in asks!! reblogs are greatly appreciated <3

[wintrcaptn]

Wish I Loved You In The Nineties | Ch. 2

Joel Miller x Reader

Summary : right person, wrong time. But maybe you can change Joel’s mind.

A/N: It’s a slow burn with angst. Sorry. But I promise when it gets spicy…it’ll be worth it!! Lol I hope you guys enjoy! Would appreciate any feedback!

3.1k words

Chapter 1

Warning : age gap (reader is of age!), cursing, angst,

The next morning had been quiet for the most part. Joel made coffee per usual, and left the mug next to my sleeping bag for me to wake up to.

Even when he was pissed off, he always made sure I woke up in a good mood.

After last night, I definitely needed some coffee. I tossed and turned all night, not able to shut my thoughts off from the kiss.

It wasn’t making any sense. Joel was the one person who knew how to get under my skin. Even though I trust him completely, I never saw him in that way. Or at least I didn’t think I did.

But if that was true…how would that kiss hold so much power over me?

I must’ve had these feelings for him without realizing, right?

I sat in the truck, sipping on my coffee, with my feet up on the dashboard trying to think back at all the significant times I had with Joel.

There must have been a moment when things changed. But when?

———

(Flash back 3 months prior)

“Do you ever smile?” I asked, sitting across from him as I ate, book in my lap. Tonight I was reading Pride and Prejudice for the hundredth time.

Joel leaned against a tree stump, his arms crossed over his chest, eyes closed. “No.” He groaned.

“Allergic to all things happy?” I teased.

His eyes shot open and glared at me. Eye brows furrowing, showing disdain in his features.

“Can I ask you something serious?” I asked.

Joel didn’t budge. He definitely didn’t stop glaring at me to show how uninterested he was in anything I had to say.

“Why did the scarecrow win an award?”

He let out a sigh and closed his eyes once again. Relaxing against the tree. “Because he was outstanding in his field.”

My eyes widened and I couldn’t help but chuckle. “You do have a sense of humor!” You exclaimed.

“Shut up.” He groaned.

Just as you were gonna look away, you noticed the small smile forming on his lips. For some reason, it made you feel good to know that deep down he did like you. Maybe not like you in a sense that he’ll be your best friend, but he likes your company enough to keep you around. And for now, that was enough.

————

(Now)

I looked at him from the corner of my eyes, feeling a bit awkward from the silence but also content having him there with me.

Joel focused his attention on the road. He had one hand on the steering wheel while the other held his travel mug. He’d take sips from time to time but not once did her ever look back at me.

It was hard to read him. And it was killing me. I just needed to know he didn’t hate me or regret the kiss because I sure as hell didn’t. I wanted more. I wanted him.

And that’s when it hit me…there wasn’t really a significant moment that made me want him…

It was the little things he did. The way he made me feel safe. The way he made me laugh with his sarcasm, which I knew he was just using to keep me at a distance.

For all the little moments spent together, the pot of coffee he made for us every morning, the reassurance of making sure I was okay. The little random books he’d bring back if he went out on his own or any extra pens he’d find.

He may have been harsh most times. May mask his emotions with anger and annoyance, but as I sat here I realized Joel had shown me he was someone I could trust in the ways he took care of me. Protected me.

“Did you hear me?” His voice caught my attention, forcing me out of my thoughts.

“Sorry what?” I cleared my throat.

“I need the map.” He muttered. “Never mind”

He pulled off to the side of the road and leaned over me to retrieve the map from the glove box. His scent grew stronger as he got closer, making my stomach flutter. And my legs clench together.

“Tryna see how much longer we got til we hit Wyoming.” He mumbled. “Still got eight more hours.”

He folded the map on his lap, and glanced outside for a moment. His silence made me nervous. Sure, joel wasn’t talkative to begin with but this was different. And it was eating me alive.

“Joel—“

“Suns goin down, maybe we should set up camp somewhere close. Then leave in the mornin.” He cut me off.

In that moment, Joel put the truck in drive and drove deeper into the woods, away from the road.

My heart was pounding profusely sitting there in such close proximity. I had wanted things to go back to how it was before but there was too much tension. It was hard to even breathe.

“Joel…we should talk.”

“Ain’t nothing to talk about.” He said, not once looking at me.

“So I’m just suppose to pretend that kiss never happened?”

He shrugged. “Already forgotten.”

Suddenly, my heart shattered from just those two words that hung in the air making it unbearable to breathe. My chest tightened and tears began to well in my eyes.

“I wish I never met you.” I whispered, turning my gaze out to the passenger window, letting the tears roll down my cheeks.

————

(Joel’s POV)

“I wish I never met you.” Her words were soft spoken but her voice quivered.

I knew that I had hurt her. Hell, I felt the same pain the moment I said it.

But I know I need to distance myself. I have to. Ever since I met her, I knew she was someone special.

She took her free time to read. She held on to hope and the idea of love so much that she never let this world get to her. Not even when those fucking assholes tried to take advantage of her and could have possibly killed her. If I didn’t—

She was gentle, and caring, and deserves more than anything I could ever give her.

Not only was I twice her age, my hands weren’t clean. I’ve killed people. A lot of them. Some who were probably just as innocent as her and—

I swallowed hard, and tightened my grip around the steering wheel, forcing myself to shake the thoughts.

Even if I were to change, I’ll forever be haunted by these memories.

Pulling up to a clearing. I parked the truck and quickly climbed out, letting the fresh cool air hit against my face. I finally let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding.

“I’ll keep watch tonight.” Her voice said, pulling me back to reality.

“Nah, that’s alright. You get some sleep—“

“I did last night.” She cut me off. “Now it’s your turn.”

“Look, I got helluva shot compared to ya. If someone were to sneak up on us, I have a better chance at protecting us over you.”

“And if you don’t ever sleep, we are as good as dead.”

She had a point. It’s been a few days since I really slept, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t tired. But the thought of her awake all alone in these woods, while I was passed out…it didn’t sit right with me.

“No. I’ll be fine.” I stated.

Her face scrunched into a disgusted look and she rolled her eyes. “You’re so damn stubborn.”

“And you’re not?”

She grabbed her book from her bag and her sleeping bag and set it up in the back of the truck bed.

“Guess we will both keep watch tonight. I’ve had enough coffee to get me through the night.” She said, climbing up onto the truck. “Not like I can sleep anyways.”

“Do you ever listen? I said I will keep watch.”

“And I said no.”

We stared at one another, not once breaking contact for what seemed like an eternity. She had furrowed brows and her jaw clenched tightly. Almost a mirror of what I look like 24hours a day.

This wasn’t like her, and it definitely wasn’t something I was used to.

Sure she was someone who did what she wanted most of the time, but when I told her to do something like sleep, she’d do it without any fuss. And now she wants to fight back?

“Fine. Just don’t bother me. You stay there, and read your little book.” I walked over to the other side away from her but still in view. “And I’ll stay here. Got it?”

She only nodded and slumped down into her sleeping bag as she opened her book.

I sat up against a tree, my rifle right beside me as I watched around, making sure no one shows up.

A small lamp sat by her, illuminating her face just enough for me to see. Her gaze stayed glued on her book as she absentmindedly nibbled on her bottom lip. Something she did quite often.

Since the day I lost Sarah, I had no issues pushing people away. Hell, I even pushed Tommy away at some point.

I didn’t care to let anyone in cuz I didn’t want to feel anything but the anger I had since she died.

Then she came in to my life and suddenly, it took every ounce of energy to push her away. To keep my walls up. It was exhausting.

As I sat there, watching her carefully…studying her features like I were never to see her again.

It was hard to deny at times like these when the world was quiet and it was just us two under the same moon, the same stars…it was hard to deny how I felt about her.

No matter how hard I fought myself over it…or how many times I denied it…I couldn’t escape the truth.

She was in everything and all things in between. She took up every space in my head, every time I closed my eyes, I saw her.

“I can feel your eyes on me.”

———

(Your pov)

I sat here, snuggled in my sleeping bag, trying hard to focus on my book in my lap. But it was useless. All I could think about was Joel.

Think about the way his lips felt against mine. The way his hands pulled me in closer against him. How much I wish I could go back to that moment in time.

My body grew hot from just the thoughts of him. It felt like I was being watched, at first I expected it to be all in my head but then I glanced up over at Joel across from me and noticed his stare.

“I can feel your eyes on me.” I said, shutting my book. “What’s your problem?”

Joel furrowed his brows and sighed. “Nothin, just read your damn book.”

“No.” I said feeling anger wash over me.

I know I wasn’t one to confront someone when I was upset, I usually shut down and hold things in but right now…I just couldn’t.

I got up and climbed off of the truck, making my way over to him. He propped up to his feet, obviously annoyed that I wouldn’t drop it.

But I didn’t care. I stood in front of him, my head tilting up too meet his gaze.

“Did you really forget about our kiss?” I asked, feeling a lump form in my throat.

“I ain’t doin this with you. Just leave it alone.”

“I can’t! Joel, I can’t.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose and turned away from me. He mumbled something under his breath before turning back around to face me.

“I told you it was a bad idea. I told you not to mix your weird fantasies with me.” He said, voice mixed with anger and exhaustion. “I kissed you cuz you wouldn’t shut up bout it.”

Tears began to well and without a warning, they stained my cheeks.

“Why are you such an asshole?!”

“Why you such a brat?” He yelled back. “You never know when to stop. When to shut up. You just push and push and push. You’re nothing but a pain in my ass!”

I stopped for a moment, taking in his words. My eye brow twitched up and I couldn’t believe this was how he felt. After all this time, I thought he was slowly opening up to me but I was wrong. He really did hate me.

“Well, you don’t ever have to worry about me annoying you any longer.” I said, as I turned on my heels to pack my things.

I felt like I couldn’t breathe, like he had just knocked all the wind out of me. But I didn’t want him to see me weak. I didn’t want him to see that he truly hurt me.

“What’s that suppose to mean?” He asked following behind.

“I’ll grab my things and be out of your hair in no time.” I said.

“Where you gonna go? We are in the middle of nowhere.”

I just ignored him as I continued shoving my sleeping bag into the bag and my book back into the bag.

“Look, it’s late. Let’s just sleep it off and come dawn you can leave.” Joel muttered, shoving his hands deep into his front pockets.

“Why wait?” I threw my bags over my shoulders and slammed the truck door shut before turning to face him one last time. “Thanks for saving me that day. Sorry for sticking around, I just didn’t want to be alone.”

With that, I start toward the dark trees behind him. My heart pounded so fast, I could hear it in my ears but no matter how scared I was, I knew I couldn’t stay anymore. The more I looked at him the more I wanted him but he didn’t want me.

“Don’t be stupid! Get back here!” His voice was loud, and demanding. But that didn’t stop me from walking away.

“You don’t know what’s out there.”

“Guess I’ll find out.” I said.

————

(Joel’s POV)

As the tension met its breaking point, I could feel myself grow frustrated by the second. She refused to listen like always, the sound of her steps grew fainter with each one feeling like a blow to my chest.

I balled my hands into fists, my knuckles turning white. “I ain’t gonna tell ya again.” My voice grew louder.

My feet had a mind of its own, stomping towards her. I didn’t care how stupid I looked right now. Fighting with the girl who I pushed away.

It didn’t take me long to reach her, but I didn’t hesitate to stop her. I grabbed her wrist and forced her to fall back into me.

“Let me go!” She demanded. But. I didn’t say a word. Instead I just stared at her with anger fueling me.

My jaw hurt from clenching is so tight, my nose flared as I scrunched my brows together. I was pissed. Beyond pissed. But I had no right and I knew I didn’t.

How did I even get here? When did I let things get this far? She was nothing to me just a little over a year ago. She has been nothing but a god damn nuisance since she came around and now I’m standing here wishing I could kiss her again. To pull her into me so close that I could feel her heart beat against me.

“Joel, you’re hurting me. Let, me go!”

I let go of her wrist, and grabbed her chin. Making her look up at me, fighting myself from kissing her. “Then fuckin listen to me.”

“Why should I?! You’ve been telling me to leave for months and now that I’m actually trying to leave, you won’t let me!” Her voice shook.

I finally released my grip I had on her. “It’s late, we are close to Wyoming. Tomorrow we will drive straight there and then we will go our separate ways.” I said. “You ain’t leavin here alone. I’m not gonna let something happen to you just because you dont know how to listen.”

“But—“

“Don’t cut me off.” My eyes were locked on to hers. The most I looked at her the more I realized just how screwed I was. She was seeping in between the crevices, she was getting to me. “Get your ass back to the camp site. Read your damn book and you do what I say when I say it…got it?”

I could see her take in every word before she nods in agreement.

“Repeat it.”

Before she opened her mouth, she quickly licked her lips. God, what I would do to taste those lips again. To feel them against mine, or wrapped around my—

“Do what you say.”

“Atta, girl.”

————

(Your POV)

My heart was pounding profusely, and so many different emotions washed over me.

I hated when Joel tried to control me. Hated when he talked down to me. But at the same time…I couldn’t help but yearn for more of it.

I’d be lying to myself if I said I didn’t think it was hot, but I had to try and shake the thoughts out of my head.

“Just so we’re clear, I’m only staying cuz I’m too tired to fight off clickers alone.” I lied. If I were being honest with myself, I really didn’t want to leave Joel in the first place. Being with him felt so right.

“Sure.” Was his only response.

He made me sit in the truck and he locked us in together.

The windows fogged from our breaths and the cold air from outside.

The silence was loud between us and I hated it. Maybe he was right. If I would’ve just listened and not beg him to kiss me…there wouldn’t be so much tension.

But of course, I don’t know when to shut up and stop.

“Here take this.” Joel said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

He wiggled himself out of his jacket and placed it over me. “Maybe now you’ll stop shaking like a damn chihuahua.”

I looked down at his jacket over my body and a small smile formed on my lips. Pulling my legs up to curl into a ball, the scent lingering off of his jacket filled my nose…it made my stomach flutter.

If he really didn’t care about me like he says, he wouldn’t go out of his way to make sure I was taken care of…right?

“Thank you.” I whispered just barely loud enough for him to hear.

———

Tagging ;

@evyiione @joeldjarin @titabel

[dystini]

Indycar Driver Lore

Indycar Driver Lore Masterlist

Josef Nicolai Newgarden

His name was originally Joseph Edgar Newgarden but it was changed when he was 6

Birthdate: Dec. 22, 1990 Hometown: Nashville, Tennessee Residence: Nashville, Tennessee Height/Weight: 6’0/177lbs

Rookie Year: 2012

Team: Penske

Follow him on: Instagram Twitter YouTube

Career Stats

2012: Sarah Fisher Hartman Racing - 23rd Overall 2013: Sarah Fisher Hartman Racing - 14th Overall 2014: Sarah Fisher Hartman Racing - 13th Overall 2015: CFH Racing - 7th Overall 2016: Ed Carpenter Racing - 4th Overall 2017: Team Penske - 1st Overall 2018: Team Penske - 5th Overall 2019: Team Penske - 1st Overall 2020: Team Penske - 2nd Overall 2021: Team Penske - 2nd Overall 2022: Team Penske - 2nd Overall 2023: Team Penske - 5th Overall

Cohosted (as of 2024 on indefinite hiatus) fan-favorite behind-the-scenes video series Bus Bros with teammate Scott McLaughlin. Bus Bros Playlist

Behind-the-scenes race weekend videos. Admit1 playlist

SRX - 2022 Nashville, 2023 Motor Mile

IMSA 2023 - Tower Motorsports - Daytona 24 | Porsche Penske Motorsport – Petite Le Mans 2024 - Porsche Penske Motorsport – Daytona 24 win

-a versatile athlete, who appeared on a 2016 episode of “American Ninja Warrior” with other NTT Indycar Series drivers and has participated in the NFL Combine and the Indiana Pacers Slam Dunk contest. He played baseball and basketball before turning to racing. -Listens to R&B and dance/EDM and is a fan of Twenty One Pilots, The Weekend, Skrillex, and Diplo -Avid gamer; is a brand ambassador for Forza Motorsport and is featured in voiceovers for multiple versions of the game, including Forza Motorsport 7 -Is an outstanding ping pong player and hosts an annual celebrity ping pong tournament around the Music City Grand Prix. It serves as a fundraiser for SeriousFun Children’s Network -Enjoys rock climbing and most outdoor activities; an avid Forza player

-cannot resist chocolate chip cookies or brownies

-doesn't like heights

Iconic/memorable moments

The rainbow cake deep throat at 15:00 "I may just put this in my crotch." 11:55 (keep watching for shirtless, sweaty Josef) Pullups with chains around his neck 0:15 (plus other drivers working out and highlights) The infamous Milk Gimp Indy 500 ad (viewer discretion advised) Drivers of the Corn - starring: Simon Pagenaud & Josef Newgarden BUS BROS Episode 12: We Got You My Favorite Summer Salad! (Because the world needs Josef Newgarden squeezing the life out food to make a salad.) starting at 0:50 Josef and Sage Karam at the 2015(?) NFL Combine 2022 INSIDE THE RACE // JOSEF NEWGARDEN Josef Newgarden shares BBQ Turkey Burger recipe LET THERE BE MILK. IndyCar off-season training hits different. Indy 500 Champ Josef Newgarden Shows Us His Workout | Train Like | Men's Health Josef Newgarden and James Hinchcliffe Visit Space Camp 2023 Indy 500: Josef Newgarden Victory Celebration Speech Josef Newgarden relives 'the worst wreck I've ever had' at Texas | 'I Survived' | Motorsports on NBC Josef Newgarden, Scott McLaughlin are teammates, friends, competitors | Motorsports on NBC PLAYING THE NEWLYWED GAME WITH THE BUS BROS: SCOTT MCLAUGHLIN & JOSEF NEWGARDEN!!!! Josef Newgarden: Defending a Championship Google Search - Josef Newgarden IndyCar Chronicles with Josef Newgarden INDYCAR 101: Driver Fitness with Josef Newgarden Josef Newgarden and Simon Pagenaud | No. 1 Josef Newgarden III (Incognito 3) INDYCAR FANswers: Josef Newgarden INDYCAR Travels: Josef Newgarden in Milwaukee Josef Newgarden Undercover

The INDYCAR Off-Season with Marco Andretti, James Hinchcliffe, Josef Newgarden and Conor Daly IndyCar: Robin Miller with Josef Newgarden at Road America Driver Josef Newgarden Red Carpet Interview from the INDYCAR Championship Celebration Josef Newgarden | Christmas Movie Quotes Reddit Asks Josef Newgarden Anything! 2022 Edition Reddit Asks Me Anything! Part 1 Reddit Asks Me Anything! Part 2 Josef Newgarden goes INTO THE CROWD to celebrate his Indy 500 victory! James Hinchcliffe talks donuts, mac & cheese and chocolate with Josef Newgarden , Romain Grosjean Will Power and more. Josef Newgarden and Scott McLaughlin | Hot Seats with Hinch

2024 Cheating scandal Team Penske hit with penalties over Push to Pass use; O’Ward declared St. Petersburg winner How Team Penske took push-to-pass beyond the limit

Penske Perfect and Details Matter are two phrases often used in conjunction with the Penske organization. And when they can be used to dunk on Ferrucci, all the better.

Josef is a perfectionist. This is a combo of his highly competitive nature - which has been said about him from a young age - and the Penske Perfect motto which he has taken to heart. He is highly critical of himself - getting very down on himself if he makes a mistake and taking the blame for things not wholly under his control. But he tried to maintain a genial if slightly arrogant image in public. He slips sometimes - there have been a few angry Twitter interactions that he later apologized for and on occasion after a race, his temper will get the better of him and he'll say things he probably shouldn't.

He can be goofy as hell as seen on Bus Bros. Scott McLaughlin has brought this out of him since becoming teammates. Josef has said that Scott makes him feel more comfortable being his real self.

I would be remiss if I did not point out Josef's thighs. He is a specimen in general but those thighs should get special attention.

Fanfic Lore

Frequently paired with teammate Scott McLaughlin. As of 2024 there has been a cooling of their friendship as Josef pulls back to focus on racing/the championship.

Historically paired with Conor Daly. They raced together in karts and lower-series cars.

[yeonban]

TOBIAS: Psycho Pass Profiling.

Name: Theodore Miller (Real name: Thomas Stratford) Nickname: Theo (most), Tobias (trusted) (Real nickname: Tobias) Affiliation: Ministry of Health and Welfare, Public Safety Bureau, Criminal Investigation Department, Division 3 (Real affiliation: Wammy's House, Winchester, UK) Occupation: Inspector (Real occupation: Undercover Wammy agent) Codename: Guarding (Real codename: T) Crime Coefficient: 0 Hue: Pure white Neuro-psychological structure: Criminally Asymptomatic Date of birth: May 24 Age: 18 Blood type: O Origin Durham, North Carolina, USA (Real origin: Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire, UK) Vision Both eyes 2.0 50m sprint time 6.4s Athletic strengths Karate, running, badminton Hobbies/Ways to kill time Chatting, walking around town, training Favorite quote “There was so much in you that charmed me that I felt I must tell you something about yourself. I thought how tragic it would be if you were wasted.” - Oscar Wilde What he likes about his room The ability to change its holo appearance at will Likes eating Oysters Dislikes eating Sweets that are too high in sugar Strength Outstanding attention to detail Weakness Mistrustful Wants To always have fun Daily sleep 6h  Motto “Man serves the interests of no creature except himself.” - George Orwell Favorite author Leo Tolstoy Preferred books Psychology books, books about the flaws and ends of humankind, books about deserved punishments Type of person he likes Trustworthy people who can make him laugh Does he feel stressed out? Never Additional information -Shares the title of youngest inspector in CID's history with Mika Shimotsuki, both receiving it at age 18. -Was sent to Japan by Wammy's House in order to investigate, spy on and keep a watchful eye on the Sibyl System. The details of how to do so are left entirely to him, but he is expected to intervene should Sibyl become an active threat to the outside world, as well as inform Wammy's House of Sibyl's intricacies and technology. Wammy's House chose him and a few others for the mission, but the Sibyl System only allowed Tobias to enter the country thanks to his spotless Crime Coefficient. As such, Tobias is the only Wammy agent currently present in Japan.

[krispyweiss]

Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Day No. 3, Golden Gate Park, San Francisco, Oct. 1, 2023

Not only are they fascinating to watch, hummingbirds have fantastic taste in music.

How else to explain the little avian hovering about Sierra Hull’s soundcheck and late-morning set at the Banjo stage on Day Three of Hardly Strictly Bluegrass?

Little birdie picked a good place to flutter around as Hull and her band played an energetic bluegrass-with-drums set, which Mr. and Mrs. Sound Bites took in in full after catching a few songs of Jon Langford & the Bright Shiners’ Scottish protest music at the Rooster.

Peeling off to catch parts of sets would be the theme for a first day of October stacked with outstanding performers who put the Hardly Strictly in the formerly Bluegrass-only fest inside San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park.

But first, a full set by Eilen Jewell - playing a guitar borrowed from Chuck Prophet - on Rooster, which found the singer and her band playing tracks from Gypsy and Get Behind the Wheel and simply slaying with a note-perfect rendition of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Green River.” Guitarist Jerry Miller is nearly as important as Jewell to the band’s success, adding twangy, country-rock spice to Jewell’s songs of love and adventure.

Then, back to the Banjo stage where musical chameleon Gabby Moreno served up slices of cumbia and American rock ‘n’ roll back-to-back and sung them in Spanish and English.

After a quick visit to Prophet and the Mission Express on Rooster, the Sound Biteses floated over to Swan for Valerie June. Wearing a loud orange outfit and backed with pedal steel, organ and rhythm section, June spun an impossible-to-categorize web of funk, soul and Americana while playing banjo and acoustic guitar and meting out songs such as “Call Me a Fool.”

Peeling off once again, the Sound Biteses were back at Banjo in time for the Travelin’ McCourys, with Punch Brothers/Might Poplar (whom we missed in favor of Emmylou Harris) banjo man Noam Pikelny filling in for Rob McCoury, and a blistering set of pure bluegrass that included “The Shaker” and “Scarlet Begonias,” with a triple-time back end, filling the park the Grateful Dead played so many times.

“Seems appropriate,” Ronnie McCoury said as your diarists peeled off yet again to the tiny Horseshoe Hill stage, for a packed 100th-anniversary tribute to Doc Watson by Mitch Greenhill, playing one of Watson’s guitars, Nora Brown and Stephanie Coleman with guest slots from Andrew Marlin, June and Langford.

“Summertime,” June’s rendition of “Handsome Molly,” Langford getting the lyrics to “Tom Dooley” from a piece of paper and “Southbound” were all on offer. And it all ended with the glorious experience of a couple hundred people singing “Keep on the Sunny Side” under the foggy skies and tall trees of Golden Gate Park.

After this life-affirming interlude, the Jerry Douglas Band was pushing blues-rock and jazz flecked with bluegrass on the Swan stage. Another peel and back to the Banjo where Rufus Wainwright played solo-acoustic and his singular voice wafted across the large expanse to the Arrow stage where Tommy Emmanuel dealt the festival’s penultimate set to a relatively small, but appreciative, hard-listening audience.

Gasps filled the air as Emmanuel played inhuman runs on his acoustic guitar on such songs as “Sixteen Tons,” “Deep River Blues” and “Blue Moon.” He introduced a phantom band as he played a bassline, then percussion and rhythm before adding lead and left the audience agog as he played them simultaneously. He wrapped up his portion with the instrumentals “Imagine” and “Beatles Medley” as Harris began her closing set back where the day began on Banjo.

With a four-piece band of multi-instrumentalists behind her, Harris concluded HSB in grand style. “Miss the Mississippi and You,” “Pancho and Lefty,” “Hickory Wind,” “Evangeline” and “The Boxer” all filled the cool, early-evening air and added a extra layer of wistfulness to the end of Hardly Strictly Bluegrass 2023.

Read Sound Bites’ Day One review here

Read Sound Bites’ Day Two review here

10/2/23

[mikelogan]

15 questions, 15 mutuals

i was tagged by @danieljradcliffe (tysm!)

1. Are you named after anyone? my middle name is the same as my mom's middle name, and i had a great-great aunt and a great-great grandma (on opposite sides of the family) that had it as a first name. my parents chose my first name bc garth brooks had recently named his daughter that after james taylor so i like to think i'm indirectly named after james taylor lol

2. When was the last time you cried? i teared up during a specific part of tfothou, but the last time i actually cried was when my parents and i finished rewatching bly manor and i sobbed on the couch

3. Do you have kids? abso-fuckin-lutely not

4. What sports do you play/have played? i do not enjoy the sportsball, but my parents made me play basketball in middle school and in my freshman year of high school, i made it through half a season of softball before permanently injuring both of my feet! i do play disc golf now with my dad, maybe once a week?

5. Do you use sarcasm? it's my native language

6. What's the first thing you notice about people? honestly, probably what they're wearing? and then i pay more attention to their face lol

7. What’s your eye color? blue

8. Scary movies or happy endings? right now, scary movies. but scary movies can still have happy endings! but i also don't mind unhappy endings either.

9. Any talents? define talent... i can wiggle both of my ears (and my right one on its own), i sing, am outstanding in the category of "how many chronic illnesses can we shove into one tired bitch," and uh idk i can't think of anything else

10. Where were you born? in my hometown, where i still currently live

11. What are your hobbies? wasting my life away on tungle dot hell, making gifs, bingewatching shows and movies, hyperfixating on old television shows no one cares about anymore, handlettering, disc golf, writing, etc.

12. Do you have any pets? i have two cats that are the loves of my life and my family has a dog that barks at everything all the time and tears my last little bits of sanity to shreds (i still love him)

13. How tall are you? 5'4"

14. Favorite subject in school? english/creative writing

15. Dream job? i do not dream of labor but boy would i sure like to get the ball rolling on long-term disability and ssdi

no pressure tags (as always): @laurabenanti @laurensgraham @jackharkness @divorcedmalewife @thatsjustdandy @matttheratking @sculien @azrphales @antlerqueer @heroeddiemunson @lucydonato @j0el-miller @swiftispunk @sophiedevreaux @natscatorrcio

[lizajane2]

The Last of Us episode 4

Waiting for this episode was excruciating. I was highly impatient.

The pun jokes! Fuck yes. “Feel free to wait in the truck.” He’s so done. 🤣🤣 but he secretly loves it I know he does.

“Why did the scarecrow get an award?”

“Because he was outstanding in his field.”

Okay, I admit that one made me chuckle a little.

Oh my god their relationship is just it’s killing me. She finds comfort in his words and the second Ellie asks that question Joel is up all night looking out for her.

“You’re cargo.” Who are you tryin’ to fool Joel Miller?!

“Who did this?” A crazy man with a little girl.

Marlene really expected to save a world that no longer gives a shit who lives and who dies. Maybe I’m just a practical person, twenty years is a long fucking time for humanity to be living that way.

Joel: “I’m not good at this.”

No but you’re trying. And it’s fucking cute and heartwarming.

Joel: “Gimmie a minute.”

Ellie: “Get up you lazy ass.”

Joel: “I’m fifty-six years old, you little shit.”

The added interactions are fucking amazing.

She got Joel to laugh. That is everything to me. To hear than man laugh and see him fucking smile, he needs that.

Me when he laughs:

I don’t know what Graig and Neil are talking about episode 3 being happy. Those two are smoking crack. I think this is the happy episode. The calmest one yet honestly.

[john-anderson112]

Glenn Thompkins received the Glenn Davis Award for high school football excellence

Glenn Thompkins, the star quarterback of Rialto Eisenhower High, made headlines once again as he was honored with the prestigious Glenn Davis Award for his outstanding performance in Southern California's high school football scene. Just two days after leading his team to victory in the Southern Section Division I championship, Thompkins received this coveted award during a ceremony held in Riverside.

Named after the esteemed Heisman Trophy winner who attended Army and Bonita High in La Verne, the Glenn Davis Award is presented annually by The Times. It serves as a testament to the remarkable talent and dedication demonstrated by high school football players in the region.

At the age of 17, Thompkins, a three-year starter for the Eagles, showcased his versatility and prowess on the field throughout the season. With an impressive 14-0 record under his leadership, the team secured their championship title by defeating Santa Ana Mater Dei with a resounding score of 56-3 at Anaheim Stadium. In this decisive game, Thompkins exhibited his multifaceted skill set by throwing for 174 yards and three touchdowns, along with rushing for 71 yards and an additional touchdown. Not content with just offensive contributions, he also made significant defensive plays, breaking up several passes and returning two punts.

Tom Hoak, Eisenhower’s coach, attributed the team's undefeated season to Thompkins, emphasizing his versatility and ability to excel in any position on the field. Standing at 5 feet 9 inches and weighing 163 pounds, Thompkins amassed impressive statistics throughout the season, passing for 1,214 yards and rushing for 717. Additionally, he showcased his defensive prowess by starting in various positions, including inside linebacker and end.

Thompkins' remarkable performance on the field has garnered attention from numerous colleges and universities, with notable institutions such as Notre Dame, Oklahoma, and Kansas vying for his talents. However, it is widely anticipated that Thompkins will sign with UCLA, where he is expected to continue his football career at the collegiate level.

Among other notable finalists for the Glenn Davis Award were quarterback Keith Smith of Newbury Park and tight end/linebacker Tony Gonzalez of Huntington Beach. The Times also recognized outstanding players and coaches from various circulation regions, highlighting their contributions to high school football:

In the Central City region, honorees included Norman Ysaguirre from Dorsey High (lineman), William Yates from Fremont High (back), and Taja Rodisha from Fremont High (coach).

The Inland Empire region featured standout players such as Coleman Johnson from Riverside Poly (lineman) and Gary Campbell from Norco High (coach).

Orange County's honorees included Tony Gonzalez from Huntington Beach High (lineman), Chris Draft from Placentia Valencia High (back), and Myron Miller from Costa Mesa High (coach).

San Fernando Valley recognized players like Keith Schiele from Lancaster Antelope Valley High (lineman), Mike Kocicka from Newhall Hart High (back), and Richard Fong from Panorama City St. Genevieve High (coach).

The San Gabriel Valley region celebrated talents such as Pene Talamaivao from Pomona Ganesha High (lineman), Miguel Meriwether from West Covina High (back), and Bob Mount from West Covina High (coach).

South Bay's standout players included John Welbourn from Palos Verdes Peninsula High (lineman), Omarr Morgan from Hawthorne High (back), and Don Morrow from Manhattan Beach Mira Costa High (coach).

South Coast region recognized talents like Brandon Whiting from Long Beach Poly High (lineman), Danjuan McGee from Long Beach Poly High (back), and Willie Donerson from Compton Dominguez High (coach).

Southeast region honored players such as Jerry Lemon from La Mirada High (lineman), Greg Ford from Whittier High (back), and Darrell Walsh from Cerritos Gahr High (coach).

Ventura region celebrated players like Leodes Van Buren from Newbury Park High (lineman), Keith Smith from Newbury Park High (back), and George Hurley from Newbury Park High (coach).

Westside's standout players included Matt Higgins from Playa del Rey St. Bernard High (lineman), Seka Edwards from Westchester High (back), and Marshall Jones from L.A. University High (coach).

Glenn Thompkins' remarkable journey from leading his team to victory on the field to receiving the prestigious Glenn Davis Award exemplifies the dedication, skill, and passion that define high school football in Southern California. His achievements serve as an inspiration to aspiring athletes and a testament to the enduring spirit of the sport.

For Reference :-

https://www.linkedin.com/in/glenn-thompkins-0aa41b130

[justapillowpetpanda]

How Smosh Took Comedy to the Next Level with These 7 Videos

In recent years, Smosh has elevated its game by showcasing some incredible talent on-screen, including improvised characters and brilliant comedic timing. I believe that YouTube and similar media are often forgotten when discussing television and entertainment, despite channels like Smosh bringing out the best in their cast members. They have proven that entertainment should progress with audiences. Screenshot source: YouTube/Smosh Games Smosh Games and Smosh Pit have become my go-to sources of entertainment. Their tabletop gaming sessions and reactions to bizarre Reddit stories have me glued to my screen for hours on end. The production quality and dedication of the entire team are outstanding, delivering an unforgettable experience for both old and new fans. I've watched some of their videos more than five times, and I still can't get enough of their playthrough of the Love is Blind game. I even had a Barbie-style poster of Toilet Girl as my lock screen for some time, just to be reminded of the laughter and joy that video has brought me. Let's get on to my top picks and I'll explain what makes them so iconic as well as what makes them so memorable.

Smosh: The Chaos Comedy We Need Right Now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-w33inkzCKU&list=PLYdEgvjg8Aa0-Pt3JXqF_geZtQOyT_lN-&index=1 They say Love is Boobs, I'd have to agree after watching this Smosh Games video MULTIPLE times. Almost every second of this video is iconic and brings some of the most memorable quotes with it. From the fear of rejection to drinking toilet tequila, this is a group of comedic chaos I will always watch. I want the relationship between Straight Chanse and Shayne to work! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOfPcDaTdNk&list=PLYdEgvjg8Aa0-Pt3JXqF_geZtQOyT_lN-&index=2 This is one of the most absurd play throughs of the Moose Master game by Smosh. Attempting to remember story actions, repressing seething rage, and much more makes this a gentleman's fever dream. The panic in Amanda Lehan-Canto's face as she realizes she has lost is one of the funniest things I've witnessed lately. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s_U4HT2HY9k&list=PLYdEgvjg8Aa0-Pt3JXqF_geZtQOyT_lN-&index=3 The trick to translating nonsense is closing your eyes like you're about to use echolocation to find meaning in the chaos...or at least that helps Angela Giarratana. Watching this honestly made me want to grab a copy of Incohearant and play with some friends. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-FGRzwDvKs&list=PLYdEgvjg8Aa0-Pt3JXqF_geZtQOyT_lN-&index=4 Watching Shayne Topp attempt to find a bunch of people in a game of hide and seek was a fantastic way to showcase the talent and humor of the cast and crew. You'll have to watch and see who gets found last because it is a wild journey for them and Shayne. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xTb8rG-K7Ac&list=PLYdEgvjg8Aa0-Pt3JXqF_geZtQOyT_lN-&index=5 Courtney Miller is one of the wittiest comedic forces I've watched, and this series of videos shows how much her talents lift Smosh to another level. Amanda yelling, "She's pink!" when the one dish comes out is absolutely hilarious and had me at a level of laughter just above wheezing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2QEXQTU5WmU&list=PLYdEgvjg8Aa0-Pt3JXqF_geZtQOyT_lN-&index=6 Reddit is already a scary place, but somehow reacting to stories alongside Shayne and his guests makes it a little bit better. There's a level of sanity coming from this video that helps someone not feel so alone in feeling one way or another about another story going viral on Reddit. The appearances of Ian Hecox and Anthony Padilla from time to time in this series is an added bonus and often hilarious. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3i23po1kK4 SmoshCast has become one of my favorite things from Smosh. It is so much fun listening in to whatever Amanda, Shayne, and guests end up discussing. This video in particular gives us an iconic line from Amanda's past regarding salsa. We've all been there and sometimes; our history can show how cringe we truly used to be. Past jobs can also reveal a lot about what we had to become or what weird things we've said. Read the full article

[castle-dominion]

castle 6x16 room 147

the cult hypnosis episode liveblog

(side note I can't believe they didn't have dever & huertas-- heck I would have loved the OTHER dever to do an audio commentary. The castle's dad one had the audio instead which, like, valid ig.) Anyway I'm on a new dvd now, which is why I am complaining about the lack of (my preferred) bonus features.

Not QUITE the same mess lol

KABOOM I loove alexis sm <3 <3

Oof I'm quitting my job to go to school I can't imagine having a job & a non-job & a tutoring gig & paying a lease & holy crap I am so privileged

Yay calling him Sito.

were not was

Jane: He didn’t have to. Good looking guy, no bags, checking in for one night?

that's a flip phone... Plenty of people have their own website. too bad the guy doesn't have imbd tho

random lady yelling.

Love esposito's outfit! so chill!

You never get a confession this early in an ep. u KNOW smth's going to go down. Is there going to be another one really fast like this where they solve it hella fast & after the third murder with an instant confession they get suspicious?

Ah she has an alibi! Is she confessing to cover for someone else?

Love the doodle. Maybe it was a code to whoever is going to read her confession I love the flashbacks. While I'm here, the door opened on the left, attached on the right. I don't think it was like that in the crime scene. wdym you don't think so?

someone is making her confess to their crime that's why this stuff is happening.

Yeah that's how addiction is alright.

I loooove how she doesn't remember! Anita Miller: No, from me!

RC: What about forensics? Did CSU come up with anything? JE: Yeah, a hotel room in New York City? (he shudders) They found all kinds of fun stuff. (not clipping)

Clipping the theory part. unless there was a tall/cext to the phone you don't have!

Doc holloway's back!!!!

Ryan & me: Two weeks? Wait a minute, that’s how long Anita says she’s been feeling blurry.

RC: As much as I love a good mystery, a small part is hoping he can give us some clarity on what the hell is going on.

idk why I find the "ask for help" poster with the guy crying in their hands so humerous. Maybe bc it reminds me of the cotton eyed joe meme I made. Me: *just commit autosurgery trying to cut off my own breast* My surgical tape: *won't stick* Me: *crying* my adhd: IF IT WEREN'T FOR COTTON EYED JOE I'D BE MARRIED A LONG TIME AGO

Love background artists.

I need details.

I love love love the way it goes with the filming. POV filming. (markiplier moments, girl hand, man hand, we also need a black guy. Like that aone scene where you have three hands at some point bc you're picking up the artifact, swapping the teddy bear, holding his nose so he doesn't sneeze, & every single movement is a different person's hand. for Diversity. We need a left-handed person now tho.

Because he did what to you? aiy dee kay. Love the music sm KB, explaining like bonvolio: Yeah, you and Anita Miller are working together on this. You’re either covering for each other or you’re covering for someone else out there.

love how there are two interrogation rooms. She's very adamant that she did this. Why not take the out? "So I didn't kill him? I'm hella confused after all..."

Get doc holloway back here. RC: What if their lives intersect, just not in such a literal sense? Me, just participating in the fictional canadian character poll: ramona flowers? powers? renata? Hold on... scott pilgrim dreams is what I'm saying.

RC: (dryly) Really? Alternate universe? That’s how little you think of me? RC in a future episode: *goes to an au where lanie is preggo & rysposito is canon. unless that was just a fanfic i read...)

I love her ring KB: (off is look) I’m sorry, it’s just, you got excited. It’s kind of cute. RC: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know how I like the weird stuff. Me: SEASON ONE

WHAT'S nothing? on your phone there?

I LOVE this kid, this absolute child. radar oreilly vibes off him, esp with castle's psychic link theoryu.

OUTSTANDING! LOVE THE WORDS! consistency bc of slaughter! "I need to confess!" 'take a number'

"She remembers bc she thought it looked suspicious" that's the only reason someone WOULD remember! & the only reason they'd take a pic.

a big bald man!

It's just a doodle. It is a celtic knot holy trinity sign, no? the van you've been disoriented. How long have you had that symbol in your head? KB: this is important! Dwight: *I killed a guy but fuck ok bestie*

Assertiveness training I love this tranny sm. He needs to get on testosterone.

Sometimes THEY scrub footage, sometimes it's the detectives...

her phone again. what is even going on with that?

I love it. love the way she picks up her jacket, the boys, she's coming back to work this late at night in an hour... I love these folks this family their dynamics their movements & body language I thouht it was jim not alexis. Peter's cafe/bistro

Her face. she is rolling her eyes & I love alexis & I love her bangs & I love alexis & the alexis-kate relationship kjsdflkjkldjfsd It IS pride! Ooh music!!

Love those two cops smiling in the elevator. IT implies that there was a conversation in there that we missed.

Me: native Esposito: also technically native EHI: *kills ppl in their "sweat lodge initiation"*

lmao SO culty he talks so slow. Need to speed this up. good gravy. Ooh I only just noticed her eyeliner. love it.

this place reminds me of japan. Why is he expecting? Oh maybe bc he killed the guy! ooOOooh! SHUT THE DOOR SHUT THE DOOR BY WHICH I MEAN NO DON'T SHUT THE DOOR YOU'RE GOING TO BE TRAPPED THIS IS MY PARANOIA KICKING IN.

Love the art of himself on the walls. Where is that? Sweden? years????

Bauer: I’m struck by the level of your hostility, Detective. It’s not healthy. RC: You know what I’m struck by is your total lack of curiosity as to why a homicide detective is asking about your employee. "little group" THOUSANDS of members across the globe! RC: Wow. That’s – amazing, how you would just know what off the top of your head. Bauer: I make a point of meeting every member of my EHI family. The people you mentioned are not among them. Me: thousands of members & you have met every one sure but u remember every one?

Bauer: *looks to the side offscreen* RC: *looks to the side too* *realizes* *rolls his eyes up* Me: I do the same thing when my brothers are standing behind me irl & annoying me so I whip around to face them...in minecraft

btw what is that glass thing on there?

grande poobah??? his what???

RC: So all three of our confessors have had problems in their lives. Alcoholism, anger management, assertiveness issues, all things that they could have gone to EHI to treat.

that's true! RC: Wipe memories. Think about it. The fogginess, the confusion over the last two weeks? KR: So you’re saying that a glorified self-help group can erase memories? How? Doc H: With drugs.

Me: *seen the s7 premier* Memories actually change all the time. Outstanding! Love the words! KR: Castle, do you have any idea how insane that sounds? I would clip that but meh RC: Just not in person. Me: Not your psychic theory again!

"Ok he did NOT flirt with me" (why does the woman's vers need to be flirty tho? /gen q for EHS or w/e their name was)

Just letting them continue to argue lol

KB: Yes, a genius at annoying me. (not clipping) RC: Yes, a genius at annoying me. KB: (aside) I’m starting to feel the urge.

the door opens the wrong way THE DOOR OPENS THE WRONG WAY THEY MENTIONED IT RIGHT AFTER MEEEE (tho I have seen it too) wait all these rooms have the same painting? srs?

the way ryan says "su'm" instead of something, I looove it. kinda hate it tho.

CSU: Detective, I traced the signal from Bauer’s video conference with Beckett. JE: So where in Stockholm is he? CSU: That’s the thing. The signal was routed through Stockholm, but it looks like it originated from a local IP address. JE: Local, as in Manhattan? CSU: As in inside this building.

Love esposito's giant coats & layers & stuff.

that hand is slim, but pretty masculine. He smiles but idk if it is flirtatious. None of the suspects said that the bathroom door was open. Why do they know his name tho? Two versions, one for women & another for men? You don't have one for left-handed ppl or someone who maybe can't use or doesn't have their right hand, for Black ppl, for any poc, for ppl who are women but don't want to smile flirtatiously with justin, for fat ppl...

Someone from the crew, yeah you do need a bunch more ppl than just justin, the suspects, & the head of ehi.

At least she pronounced her T. Oof the music. it's so good.

Aw dwight never got to confess slkdjfslkdfjl these three have become friends & I love it sm. Friendship forged in a situation like this.

KB: It’s okay, Castle. You know I like the weird ones. Me: YES YES SJDLFSJKDFLSJDKLFJDS THIS IS THE SERIES

KB: (slyly) How do you know what I do to you when you’re sleeping?

Alexis!!!

[schmweed]

[usafphantom2]

👆 sent out a NOTAM ( notice to Airmen) on May 19, 1977, the day before the first planned flight near the border of the Soviet Union.

The message stated their intention to test-fire a missile up to an altitude of 100,000 feet.!

The coordinates into which the missile was to test fire happen to be precisely the same bracket the SR 71 intended as a point of ingress and egress to/from the Barents Sea.

Phone calls were quickly made to and from the United States and Great Britain.

Kelly Johnson, the designer of the SR 71, had expressed his reservations about going ahead with the mission.

JT Vida and Tom Alison had been selected for this mission. They had no concerns. Habu’s are confident men because they know the facts and they know what their airplane can do.

The mission went on as scheduled on May 20, 1977. It was coordinated with an RC 135V rivet joint electronic intelligence aircraft and proved outstanding. The results with both platforms were, capturing the radio, frequency, and signal associated with the Soviet SA-5 Gammon surface-to-air missile ( SAM )

Tom Alison, pilot, and JT Vida, RSO in the SR 71, 958, exited the collection area without the attention of a SAM.

Alison recalled, “JT and I had spent 45 minutes in the “denied area” specified by the N0TAM. Flying at a little over Mach 3. Allison said, “It was just another day at the office!”

I look forward to Paul Crickmore’s new book on November 21, 2023. Lockheed Blackbird

Beyond the Secret Missions – The Missing Chapters

The Smithsonian Institute at Udvar-Hazy Center, Located in Chantilly, Virginia, has the SR 71 #972 that flew across America from Los Angeles to Washington DC in 64 minutes. It also has a JT Vida (he tragically died of cancer in 1992 ) pressure suit. Nearby, you can find Tom Alison’s flight suit. Tom went on to be Director of Collections for the Smithsonian.

Post by Linda Sheffield Miller

[theblackprint67]

Bernard Jeffrey McCullough (October 5, 1957 – August 9, 2008), better known by his stage name Bernie Mac, was an American comedian and actor. Born and raised on Chicago's South Side, Mac gained popularity as a stand-up comedian. He joined fellow comedians Steve Harvey, Cedric the Entertainer, and D. L. Hughley in the film The Original Kings of Comedy.

After briefly hosting the HBO show Midnight Mac, Mac appeared in several films in smaller roles. His most noted film roles were as Frank Catton in the 2001 remake of Ocean's 11 and as the title character of Mr. 3000. He was the star of his eponymous show, which ran from 2001 through 2006, earning him two Emmy Award nominations for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series.

Mac's other films included starring roles in The Players Club, Head of State, Bad Santa, Guess Who, Pride, Soul Men.

Early life and Education

Bernard Jeffrey McCullough was born on October 5, 1957, in Chicago, Illinois. Mac was the second child of Mary McCullough and Jeffrey Harrison. Mac was raised by his single mother (who died of cancer when he was sixteen years old) and his grandparents on the city's south side.

Mac began his high school career at Chicago Vocational High School. His mother died in 1973 when he was 16 years old. Shortly afterward, Mac's older brother and his estranged father both died. Mac later graduated from Chicago Vocational High School in 1975.

During his 20s and through his early 30s, Mac worked in a variety of jobs, including janitor, coach, professional mover, cook, bus driver, Wonder Bread delivery man, furniture mover, and UPS agent, while doing comedy on the weekends at clubs and parties.

Career (Rise to success)

Bernie Mac's influences were from The Three Stooges and listening to stand-up comedians Richard Pryor and Redd Foxx. Mac started as a stand-up comedian in Chicago's Cotton Club. After he won the Miller Lite Comedy Search at the age of 32, his popularity as a comedian began to grow. A performance on HBO's Def Comedy Jam thrust him into the spotlight; after Martin Lawrence was unable to calm an increasingly hostile crowd, Mac went onstage and said, "I ain't scared o' you mothafuckas," telling the audience that he "didn't come here for no foolishness."

Mac opened for Dionne Warwick, Redd Foxx and Natalie Cole. He played a small role in 1994's House Party 3 as Uncle Vester. He also had a short-lived talk show on HBO titled Midnight Mac. Later, Mac also acted in minor roles, playing Mr. Johnson the no-nonsense owner of a grille and diner in the movie B.A.P.S., and "Pastor Clever" in Ice Cube's 1995 vehicle Friday. Following that role, Mac was chosen to play the title role in the 1995 Apollo revival of The Wiz.

Mac had his first starring role as "Dollar Bill", a silly, slick-talking club owner in 1998's The Players Club. Mac was able to break from the traditional "black comedy" genre, having roles in the 2001 remake of Ocean's Eleven and becoming the new Bosley for the Charlie's Angels sequel, Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle.

The Bernie Mac Show

In 2001, the Fox network gave Mac his own television sitcom called The Bernie Mac Show portraying a fictional version of himself. In the show, he suddenly becomes custodian of his sister's three children after she enters rehab. Mac broke the fourth wall to tell his thoughts to the audience.

The show contained many parodies of events in Bernie's actual life. Mac, who grew up on Chicago's South Side, was a fan of the Chicago White Sox, and would often sneak a reference to his favorite team in episodes, including enlisting then-White Sox pitcher Jon Garland to make a guest cameo appearance. In the 2005 season he wore a White Sox jacket and cap, and congratulated his hometown Chicago White Sox and their staff members on their recent World Series championship.

The show was not renewed after the 2005–2006 season. The series finale aired on April 14, 2006. Among other awards, the show won an Emmy for "Outstanding Writing", the Peabody Award for excellence in broadcasting, and the Humanitas Prize for television writing that promotes human dignity. His character on The Bernie Mac Show was ranked No. 47 in TV Guide's list of the "50 Greatest TV Dads of All Time".

During his run on the show, Mac had co-starring roles in Bad Santa and Head of State, as well as starring roles in the baseball-themed film Mr. 3000, and Guess Who?,a remake of the film Guess Who's Coming to Dinner.

Later years, illness and death

On March 19, 2007, Mac told David Letterman on the CBS Late Show that he would retire from his 30-year career after he finished shooting the comedy film, The Whole Truth, Nothing but the Truth, So Help Me Mac. "I'm going to still do my producing, my films, but I want to enjoy my life a little bit", Mac told Letterman. "I missed a lot of things, you know. I was a street performer for two years. I went into clubs in 1977 and was on the road 47 weeks out of the year."

During this time, Mac was having success as a popular film actor, starting with an appearance in the 2007 film Transformers as the car salesman "Bobby Bolivia", and serving as the voice of Zuba, Alex the Lion's long-lost father in Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa. He co-starred with Samuel L. Jackson in the 2008 musical comedy Soul Men. These last two movies were released months after his death. His final film role was as Jimmy Lunchbox in the 2009 film Old Dogs which was released a year after his death.

In the final four years of his life, Mac publicly disclosed that he had had sarcoidosis, a disease of unknown origin that causes inflammation in tissue. Sarcoidosis frequently attacked his lungs. On July 19, 2008, Mac was admitted to the Northwestern Memorial Hospital in his hometown of Chicago. After being treated in the ICU for three weeks, Mac went into cardiac arrest and subsequently died during the early morning hours on August 9, from complications of sarcoidosis at the age of 50.

Mac's public memorial was held a week after his death at the House of Hope Church, with nearly 7,000 people in attendance. Notable mourners at Mac's funeral were Chris Rock, Chicago Mayor Richard M. Daley, Samuel L. Jackson, Ashton Kutcher, Don Cheadle, the cast members from The Bernie Mac Show, and his Kings of Comedy fellows D. L. Hughley, Cedric the Entertainer, and Steve Harvey.

Personal Life

Mac married his high school sweetheart Rhonda Gore on September 17, 1977, and together they had a daughter, Je'Niece, born in 1978.

In the 2003 National League Championship Series, Mac sang "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" at Wrigley Field with the Chicago Cubs leading the Florida Marlins in the series 3 games to 2 and in Game 6 by a 2–0 score at the time (it would soon be 3–0 in the bottom of the 7th). Instead of saying "root, root, root for the Cubbies" Mac said, "root, root, root for the champs!, champs!" The Cubs lost the game following the Steve Bartman incident and the series, with some fans claiming that Mac helped jinx the Cubs. Mac later admitted that he had hated the North Side's Cubs his whole life, being a die-hard fan of the South Side's White Sox, and was seen during the White Sox' 2005 World Series victory at U.S. Cellular Field.

Mac had a history of health problems before he went public with his health struggles. The first occurred in the summer of 2004, when Mac was filming both Ocean's Twelve and Guess Who while also promoting Mr. 3000. He was set to film the remainder of Season 4 of The Bernie Mac Show in October of that year, but due to contracting pneumonia in both lungs and suffering from exhaustion, Fox halted production for four weeks so Mac could recover.

Legacy and tributes

The first two of Mac's posthumous films, Soul Men and Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa, were released three months after his death and were dedicated to him. Mac's third posthumously released and final film, Old Dogs, was released a year after his death. The 2008 Bud Billiken Parade, which was held in Chicago on the day of Mac's death, was also dedicated to his memory. On the day of Mac's funeral, his hometown's local television station WCIU-TV aired an exclusive television special, A Tribute to Bernie Mac, and had interviews with his former colleagues including Camille Winbush, Chris Rock, Joe Torry, Cameron Diaz, Don Cheadle, and some of his family members & close friends.

During Steve Harvey's television show which aired November 14, 2016, Harvey read a proclamation from Chicago's Mayor Rahm Emanuel proclaiming November 14 as "Bernie Mac Day". Steve Harvey's guests included Bernie's wife Rhonda, their daughter Je'Niece, granddaughter Jasmine, and Bernie's The Original Kings of Comedy co-stars D. L. Hughley, Cedric the Entertainer, and Guy Torry (who was the original host at the beginning of the tour). Mike Epps, appearing via satellite, along with the principal of Bernie and Rhonda's alma mater Chicago Vocational High School (CVS), revealed and unveiled the renaming of CVS Auditorium to the "Bernie Mac Auditorium".

On February 14, 2017, Rolling Stone named Bernie Mac #41 of the 50 Best Stand-Up Comics of All Time.

[lukeswritings]

Cardinals, Dodgers, White Sox Finalize Three-Team Trade

2:25pm: In addition to the others, the Dodgers receive 17-year-old right-hander Oliver Gonzalez from the Cardinals. The Cardinals will get a player to be named later or cash from the Dodgers and cash from the White Sox. Chicago will get a player to be named later or cash from the Dodgers on top of the prospects.

11:26am: Russell Dorsey of Yahoo Sports confirms that the final trade is Fedde and Pham to St. Louis, Edman and Kopech to the Dodgers, and Vargas, Perez, and Albertus to Chicago.

11:22am: Jeff Passan tweets that Noah Miller is not in the trade.

11:15am: The Dodgers, Cardinals, and White Sox are working to finalize a trade involving Erick Fedde, who will go to St. Louis, Tommy Edman, who will go to Los Angeles, and a prospect package, which will go to Chicago.

According to Ken Rosenthal of The Athletic, a three-team deal was close this morning. Bob Nightengale further reported that reliever Michael Kopech is going from the White Sox to L.A. and that outfielder Tommy Pham is moving from Chicago to St. Louis. Pham played the first four and a half seasons with the Cardinals. The prospects from the Dodgers going to Chicago are a group of infielders — Miguel Vargas, Jeral Perez, Noah Miller, and Alexander Albertus.

Fedde has been outstanding this season after playing last year in Korea, pitching to a 3.11 ERA in 121 2/3 innings over 21 starts. He signed a two-year, $15 million contract with the White Sox in December, so he will remain under club control for another season. The 31-year-old right-hander began his career with the Nationals, debuting in 2017 and spending six seasons with the team. He generally struggled as a back-of-the-rotation arm and decided to take his talents across the Pacific Ocean for the 2023 season, playing with the NC Dinos. The gamble paid off as he went 20-6 with a 2.00 ERA and 209 strikeouts in 30 starts and was awarded the Choi Dong-won Award, the equivalent to the Cy Young Award for the best pitcher in the KBO, and the KBO MVP award.

The addition of Fedde for the Cardinals signifies a likely return to the bullpen for Andre Pallante. The current rotation consists of Sonny Gray, Miles Mikolas, Pallante, Lance Lynn, and Kyle Gibson, but they rank in the bottom half of major league teams with a 4.09 team starting pitching ERA. Fedde will be a welcome addition to the oldest rotation in the majors.

Bringing in Pham is a full-circle moment for the 36-year-old outfielder and the Cardinals. He was a 16th-round pick of the 2006 draft by St. Louis and didn't debut until 2014. He didn't play an entire season until 2017, when he burst onto the scene with 23 home runs, a .306/.411/.520 slash line and received down-ballot MVP votes. He would be traded at the deadline the next year to Tampa Bay and became an excellent player for them, with a 135 OPS+ as the everyday left fielder for the Rays in the second half of '18 and all of 2019. This outstanding stretch made him a key face on the market, and he ultimately made his way to San Diego in another trade as part of a package with Jake Cronenworth before the 2020 season. While that season was underwhelming for him at the plate, the offseason was another horror story as in October of 2020, he was stabbed outside of a San Diego strip club in his lower back. He would receive 200 stitches in surgery but made it back onto the field, and impressively, he could still be on the field for the entire 2021 season. Another down season with the bat and the lockout of the 2021-22 offseason led to him not signing with a team until late March, when he agreed to a one-year deal with the Reds. The most notable event of the 2022 season for Pham would be him slapping Joc Pederson of the Giants in May during batting practice over a meme sent in a group text regarding a fantasy football league that Pederson and Pham had been in seven months prior. He would be suspended three games and eventually was traded at that year's trade deadline to the Red Sox, where he continued to struggle. The past two seasons have seen Pham play with the Mets and Diamondbacks in 2023, the White Sox, and now the Cardinals in 2024.

Pham will not be an everyday player for the Cardinals, but he looks to platoon as the weak side with Michael Siani in center field. For his career, Pham is much better against left-handed pitching, and 2024 is no exception. He's slashing .255/.377/.471 against them in 61 plate appearances.

The 27-81 White Sox have long been named a seller at this year's deadline, and the deal of Fedde and Kopech looks to be the beginning of a mass exodus of players from the current roster. Vargas, Perez, and Albertus will help solidify a weak minor-league system.

Kopech is amidst a solid first season as a full-time reliever. He has dealt with various injuries that have dampened the excitement of him once being the second-ranked prospect in the White Sox organization and the prime return in the 2016 Chris Sale trade with the Red Sox. Kopech will provide the Dodgers with some back-end bullpen depth that has been missed, with Brusdar Graterol and Ryan Brasier injured nearly the entire season thus far. In 43 games out of the bullpen in 2024, he's amassed 59 strikeouts in 43 2/3 innings, along with nine saves. An ERA of 4.74 is not the most shiny, but a top ten percent K% and fastball velocity in the majors stand out.

Edman is an exciting piece in the trade, as he has yet to play a game in 2024 after undergoing arthroscopic wrist surgery in October 2023. He was sent on a rehab assignment three weeks ago, so his season debut will be soon. He has ten days remaining to rehab before the Dodgers must activate him. An above-average defender at second, shortstop, third, and each outfield position, Edman will provide Los Angeles with some much-desired depth with Mookie Betts on the injured list after fracturing his hand in mid-June. Chris Taylor and Max Muncy are also on the injured list, so the infield is as bare-bones as possible. Kiké Hernandez at third, Nick Ahmed at shortstop, Gavin Lux at second, and Cavan Biggio at first make up the infield. None were expected to play as significant of roles as they are right now when the season began. Ahmed was just signed last week after being released by the Giants.

The Dodgers will also acquire pitcher Oliver Gonzalez, a 6'4" right-hander who the Cardinals signed out of Panama this past winter. He pitched in seven games at their Dominican Summer League affiliate, so he's as far out from the majors as someone could be. He has a 4.22 ERA in 21 1/3 innings, but his 26-to-7 K/BB ratio is sterling.

Miguel Vargas is the most well-known name heading to Chicago. A one-time top prospect, the 24-year-old Cuban only got a chance for a few factors, namely the Dodgers' exceptional depth and a lack of a defensive position. He mostly played third and some first in the minor leagues but was blocked coming up through the minors. He began to play some left field in 2022 and debuted with the Los Angeles in August of that year for a handful of games. Vargas has already used up the final option of his career, so next season, he will be out of them. This stretch will be an excellent opportunity to show off with a team on the exact opposite of the spectrum, depth-wise, as the Dodgers.

Albertus and Perez are 19-year-old infielders who were top-20 prospects in the Dodgers system. Albertus was signed in 2022 out of Aruba, and Perez the same year out of the Dominican Republic. The former has split the season between the Arizona Complex League and Single-A Rancho Cucamonga with a very impressive .342 average in 32 games in the complex leagues. Albertus can play the third and short, but his bat is his forte. Scouting reports call him a bat-first prospect who could see playing time at multiple infield positions. At such a young age, he is still a long way off from impacting the major league team, but he immediately jumps into a favorable position with an organization that has struggled to make any splashes in developing young players.

Perez has played the entire season at Single-A Rancho Cucamonga, and at just 19 years old, he is one of the youngest players in the league. Like Albertus, he can play multiple infield positions, mostly seeing time this season at second base, but he played an even dispersal between second, third, and short across his two prior minor league seasons. He led Rancho Cucamonga in home runs with ten and has a keen eye, resulting in well above-average walk rates. According to Fangraphs, Perez has a good hit tool but has trouble controlling the barrel of his bat. A comparison given is Brendan Rodgers of the Colorado Rockies.

[vickiabelson]

Today Live, Hal Linden! I’m literally pinching myself. Thank you Max Gail for enabling this to happen. I loved Barney Miller, and everyone in it, especially Hal and Max. Topping even that, on break from the hit show, my father, Larry Katz, a borscht belt Master of Ceremonies, shared a bill with Hal at the Yiddish Theatre in New York. My father not only introduced him but sang to open for him, as well. Hal was one of his heroes. To say my father was over the moon is a gross understatement. He was euphoric. 

Hal’s career has spanned more than 65 years on stage, television, and in film. Best known for his portrayal of police precinct captain Barney Miller in the hit television series that aired from 1975-1982, which earned Hal Emmy nominations every year it was on as well as multiple Golden Globe nominations. Hal won two Daytime Emmys for Outstanding Individual Achievement for his host work on the children’s show, Animals, Animals, Animals. 

Hal made his Broadway debut in 1957 in the musical Bells Are Ringing opposite Judy Holliday and subsequently toured with the national company.  He later starred in the 1962 Off-Broadway revival of Cole Porter’s 1930s hit Anything Goes. To date, he’s performed in more than 20 Broadway and Off-Broadway productions. His numerous stage credits include On a Clear Day You Can See Forever, Subways Are for Sleeping, The Apple Tree, The Pajama Game, The Sisters Rosenzweig, A Christmas Carol, Tuesdays With Morrie, I’m Not Rappaport, Something More, The Education of Hyman Kaplan, Three Men on a Horse, Chicago, Cabaret, The Gathering and The Rothschilds, for which he won the 1971 Tony Award for Best Actor In A Musical.

Hal’s TV appearances have included The Golden Girls, The Nanny, Touched by an Angel, Law & Order, Will & Grace, The King of Queens, Hot in Cleveland, 2 Broke Girls and  Grey's Anatomy, and a recurring role on The Bold and The Beautiful, to name but a few. 

Currently, Hal’s readying to co-star with Marilu Henner in Ed Weinberger’s, The Journals of Adam and Eve. 

We’ve spoken on the phone. Twice. I’m giddy with excitement. This one’s for you, Larry Katz! 

Hal Linden Live on Game Changers with Vicki Abelson

Wednesday, April 3, 5 PM PT, 8 PM ET 

Streaming Live on my Facebook

Daily by Toni Vincent & @peter_and_paul_ Cartoons