#how is steve alive after drinking so many energy drinks

[crewfu]

☹️

[eddieslittlefreak]

bleaching my heart - steddie ff.

summary: steve gets back with nancy because this is all he ever wanted. at least he thought.. and a very specific someone just won’t leave his mind.

note: school is taking away all my time and energy from writing, i hate this :( song rec. for this is definitely bleach by 5 seconds of summer

There was a little gathering at school and everyone was more than happy to be there. Things turned out to be good for once in Hawkins and Steve couldn’t be happier. He was alive, all this madness ended and he got Nancy by his side. He wanted to get her back somehow in forever now and he should be feeling nothing but joy and love. 

But fuck. He couldn’t ignore this.

He couldn’t ignore the knot in his throat whenever someone mentioned him and Nancy together for the first time in a while. He couldn’t ignore how he sometimes totally spaced out, thinking about everyone and everything but Nancy. He couldn’t ignore how he told Nancy that she was in his dreams and how he wanted all of this. It was a mistake, Steve now knew it, but couldn’t bring himself to say this out loud. To say this to Nancy. And most importantly..

Steve couldn’t ignore Eddie’s eyes on him from across the room.

With Eddie, Steve felt different. He always thought he is just the troubled kid and he has nothing to do with him, but then one night after they got back from the upside down, Steve found himself in Eddie’s arms and ever since then, every little space in his mind got filled with the thought of Eddie. Steve felt like he was living again, when he was with Eddie. Now he knew that all of this with Nancy was a mistake. Nancy was nice and kind, Steve liked her but he was just too blind to see that it’s not like that anymore.  It just happened that Steve found someone who was a little better for him.

Someone who he hurted when he left him alone in the morning after they made love for the first time the other night. Someone who still ached after Steve’s every little movement. Someone who made Steve feel the closest to the feeling of being in love. 

This someone was Eddie, who was uncomfortably rocking on his heels right next to the table with the drinks. 

And damn it.. Nancy knew all of this, she wasn’t stupid. She just wanted Steve to say it himself. She didn’t mind it, because Steve was suffering for a long time now and he deserved happiness. It was bad to see him so sad and maybe it was a lie that Nancy said she wanted this, too. Everything was a mess, and it was difficult to see clear. But it was time to move and not be freezed in time. 

Around midnight Eddie left and went up to the roof. Steve was hesitant, but eventually he followed him. On his way up the stairs he couldn’t stop thinking about how Eddie won’t ever forgive him now. Steve was the best version of himself, but he didn’t believe he was a good person. Yet Eddie.. Eddie kind of made him feel like that. When Steve was seventeen he felt like he owns the world. That he knows everything and everything is just a game and he is destined to win in all of them. He felt on the top of everything. And now at the edge of twenty one he felt like nothing. He knew nothing, he was confused and lost. He already drank too much and just wanted to sit down somewhere and cry, because there was too much in him. At the end of the day he was nothing new and he was about let too many people down.  He slowly opened the door that led to the roof, just to get hit by the ice cold air right in the face. His cheeks were burning from the alcohol and the cold was hurting his skin as he stepped out from the doorstep. Eddie heard his steps behind him so he hesitantly, but turned to face the person behind him. Steve felt like he got hit in the gut, because it’s been a while since he has been this close to Eddie. And gosh, he looked absolutely beautiful. And sad. 

Steve thickly swallowed before the first few words left his ice cold lips.

“I missed you.” he breathed out, leaving hot marks in the air between the two of them.

“You came up here to tell me that?” Eddie looked at him with a blank expression, trying to suppress everything that was killing him from the inside. Steve sighed, not breaking the delicate eye contact for a second. “Go back.”

“No.” Steve answered, stepping closer. “Not without you.”

“Not without me?” Eddie laughed, bitterly. “To me it seemed like you are just fine without me.” Steve’s heart was aching in his chest to finally confess everything to Eddie, but he was a coward. Love was always something that made Steve terrified. Maybe because he never got enough of it and he didn’t even know how to love right. But Eddie.. Eddie had so much love to share and he wanted to give it all to Steve.

“No.” Steve said again, as his drunk thoughts started to overtake him. “I want you.” he was so close to Eddie now and as he tripped in his own leg, Eddie caught him just in time. “I miss you, Eddie.. fuck, I miss you.” he repeated it.

“Steve, please don’t do this.” Eddie tried to push him away but Steve held him so tightly that Eddie had no chance. It’s like Steve was afraid of falling down off the roof if he didn’t hold him. 

“I’m stupid, I’m so fucking stupid..” he pressed his face onto Eddie’s chest, muttering the feelings soaked words softly into the material of his shirt. “I never should have left you. I’m better with you, I don’t want to let you go.” he sobbed, every word as heavy as an anchor.

“Steve, for fuck’s sake.. you’re with Wheeler, what does this have to do with me?” Eddie rested his arms on Steve’s back, now accepting the fact that he won’t move.

“I didn’t.. I don’t want to.. I just.. fuck..” Steve whined. “I want you Eddie. I want you so badly, it physically hurts.” he finally stood up straight, eyes a bit foggy from all of the emotions that were causing a hurricane in him. Eddie turned his head away, looking down at the town like this whole thing didn’t matter. The truth was that it did matter. He tried to forget it, but he couldn’t. He loved Steve, it was more than obvious now, and it was like a dagger in the middle of his back when Steve got back with Nancy. Eddie felt betrayed and he tried to remove the dagger that was sinking into his skin deeper and deeper, but he just couldn’t seem to reach it. And now, on this cold night Steve offered to remove it himself and even heal the scar. “I’ll tell Nancy. I promise, I will.” Steve said, snapping Eddie back into reality. “Just please. I don’t want to let you go. I’m sorry for everything. I know it now that my place is next to you and I don’t care about anything else.”

This time Eddie got closer, sneaking his hand up onto Steve’s cold face that was colored rose red. He gently brushed his thumb over the sensitive skin and then softly touched Steve’s bottom lip.

“Big words, you know that?” Steve nodded, melting into the touch of his missed lover. “You have no clue what I felt when I saw you with her again. The way you said her name.. I wanted you to say my name like that. To tell everyone I’m yours. Such a daydream, right?” he smiled sadly. 

“Eddie..” Steve whispered and the name was more than crystal clear the silence of the night. “Eddie, Eddie, Eddie..” he started to repeat it with the burn of passion that rolled off from the tip of his tongue. “My Eddie.” he dared to kiss him, so urgent but slow at the same time. The last few months were more than hard but now everything seemed to be alright. 

Because Steve was nothing new, but for Eddie he was an old poem. And he memorized every line. 

[stardustvanilla]

— heartbeat (b.b.)

summary: you work for tony stark as an assistant in his labs. you even live in the compound with the avengers and bucky had just joined the group since steve finally convinced him. you are about to get ready for bed when your abusive ex shows up in your bedroom. 

pairing: bucky barnes x female!reader

warnings: abusive ex, abuse triggers, rape warning, dirty talk (not from bucky), angst, protective & soft bucky, dog tags, fluff, bucky being a gentleman, language, pet names

words: 2k

masterlist | bucky masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~

Wanda brought out a game of Battleship which she and Sam started playing. It was a pretty quiet evening so far. Sam forgot that Wanda could read minds. So after at least ten games with Sam losing to Wanda, Bucky interjected and decided to play against Wanda, and won.

“HOW THE HELL!” Sam stormed out of the kitchen and Wanda started laughing her ass off.

“Oh my god, that was amazing!” Her words came out stuttered through laughs. Bucky knew that Wanda could read minds and that’s how she beat Sam. He decided to play at his own little game and create a thought that was “talking” to Wanda.

“Really?” Steve shook his head at the two. Cap left the room to do Captain stuff which left Wanda and Bucky to a fair game of Battleship.

~

You walked into the large room of the compound wearing pajamas and a blanket wrapped around you.

You start walking over to the couch when you bump into somebody, your knees giving out underneath you. You look up to see blue eyes staring back at you. His jaw was covered in light stubble and the red Henley rubbed against your cheek. Bucky had his hands on your hips and you had yours right on his abs.

“You alright?” You blushed and struggled a little to stand.

“Umm--uh, thank you, I’m alright, I think I just forgot about gravity for a second,” You stuttered your words out but Bucky understood and chuckled. She’s a keeper, he thought.

He gave a glance at you and blushed. The blanket wrapped around your cold body made you look much younger and way more innocent. Your tank top dipped slightly and hugged your chest and your shorts showed most of your legs. You let go of him and wrapped your blanket more tightly around yourself which made your cleavage show more but Bucky looked directly at your face knowing he should be a gentleman about this.

He looked you in the eyes which made his urges a lot worse. You both looked away from each other, realizing that Wanda was walking over.

“It’s nice to see you Y/N! Stark has been keeping you so busy that I’m surprised your still alive,” You smiled knowing what Wanda was talking about. After catching up with Wanda you went and sat on the couch and turned on your favorite movie.

Bucky was staring at you from the kitchen because god damn you looked gorgeous. You were laughing at the movie and the smile you gave off made his knees weak. It’s like you gave off this energy that lit up a room.

Steve noticed Bucky’s stare and smirked. You had that effect on people. But Bucky looked head over heels for you.

It was a calm night but you enjoyed yourself for the first time in a while. You were very devoted to working. It was really the only thing you had other than the Avengers. You lost touch with your old family and friends long ago. Now it was just you and your new family, which they loved you like a little sister.

“I’m gonna hit the hay,” You mumbled quietly. Bucky paused the movie and rubbed your back.

“Okay, just make sure your quiet. Nat gets cranky when someone wakes her up,” You smiled and stood up leaving the avengers to their conversations.

“She getting tired?” Clint questioned. Bucky nodded taking a sip from his drink. “She gets tired easily and lately Y/N has been in the labs, working constantly,” Clint said.

Bucky understood why. You seemed like a quiet girl and you tried to make everyone happy.

Everyone was playing Monopoly at the kitchen counter once the movie was over. Since there were so many of them, they were grouped up into teams. Bucky and Wanda being partners. 

“GODDAMMIT BUCKY!” Sam was cursing non-stop and Tony had covered Peter’s ears since he was a “child” and Wanda was on the floor crying of laughter.

~

You walked into your bedroom and put on some fuzzy socks. Closing the door, you went over to your desk and opened your laptop, opening a file from today. You were scanning over it, making sure that it was ready to be sent to Stark. Lately, Tony has been working on a new suit and you have been at his side 24/7.

“Damn computer,” You mumbled. The wifi worked perfectly but you have always had your old computer and it was starting to slow down. You were sitting there for at least half an hour waiting for it to update. You tapped the desk with your finger, waiting for it to fix itself when you heard a shuffle behind you. You swung around and tipped out of your office chair and fell into someone again. They pulled you up and you looked them in the face.

“Still clumsy as ever,” Your breath hitched as he spoke. His eyes burned into yours and he had on a black t-shirt with jeans. You pulled away from his grip and pushed him aside.

“Get out,” You looked away from him as you pointed to the door.

“I don’t think I will,” He said with cockiness in his voice. “By the looks of those pajamas, seems like I’ll be here all night,” He was back. You had run away from him, exactly like you had run away from your family. It was the middle of the night when Clint had found you walking roundly aimlessly in the streets of Manhattan.

“How did you find me?” You kept your face down. He smirked and grabbed your wrist, pushing you up against a wall. He was much bigger than you. He always had been.

“I don’t think you need to know that,” You felt his hot breath on your neck and you were ready for what he was about to throw at you this time. He didn’t let you leave the relationship, you were glued to his side. There were only two reasons you stayed anyway. His threats and the money. He was a billionaire and you were his little puppet.

He dragged his hands along your sides and you felt the rings that you knew so well. It’s just a dream, you thought. He’s not here. Just another dream. His hand went under your shorts and you felt his knuckles rub against your core. You wouldn’t give him what he wanted, no matter what he did, he wouldn’t get it. His lips connected with your neck and you held in the urge to moan. He always made you fall apart.

“Stop,” You whispered.

“I don’t think I will,” He pulled off your clothes, leaving you in a bra and underwear that you wouldn’t even be wearing if you had gone to bed. Exposed for him again, just like old times.

~

Bucky and Steve were walking to their bedrooms together in silence. Both of them were tired and had zero energy being the old men they are. Their rooms were near yours and Steve had specifically requested it. After what Clint had told him, Steve wanted to keep an eye on you. He said goodnight to Buck and walked into his room, which was across the hall from yours. Bucky walked past your door since his was beside yours. The super-soldier opened his door and suddenly heard a faint ‘no’ come from your bedroom.

“What the hell?” He mumbled. He heard a small whimper come from your bedroom and quickly reached for his gun.  

~

“No,” You mumbled as his fingers slid inside you, pumping in and out trying to find your sweet honey.

“You remember how too,” He whispered in your ear. You tried to hold it all in, the moans, the wetness, but all you were ever used to was him. You let out a small whimper and he chuckled. “There it is,” His fingers started going faster and you gasped as he hit your g-spot.

“No,” You said it a little louder than the first and he quickly pulled his fingers out of your heat. You knew he wasn’t actually going to stop. He flipped you around and pulled your underwear completely off while pushing your chest into the wall. You bit your lip. He hasn’t changed, you thought. A hard slap hit your ass and you whimpered again. It wasn’t as bad as before.  

The door swung open and before having time to register what had happened, you had fallen to the floor from losing the hand that was holding you up. You opened your eyes and saw Bucky standing above you and your ex was on the floor.

Your cheeks were wet from tears and you could still feel him on you. The former assassin helped you up and brushed his hand along your cheek. Tears were dripping down your cheeks and you quickly stuffed your face into Bucky’s chest. He pulled you in for a hug and wrapped his arms around you tightly. He picked you up while you wrapped your legs around his waist. It was hard to focus on what Bucky was doing. All that was running through your mind was, how did he find you?

You felt the softness of bed sheets and the loss of Bucky’s warmth. You pulled the sheets up closer to your head and Bucky sat beside you, starting to run his hands through your hair.

“It’s alright, doll,” The sound of his voice made your worries go away. “I’m here to protect you. You can sleep with me from now on, how ‘bout that hon?” You nodded your head in response. A few minutes later Bucky had noticed that you had fallen asleep so he quietly stood up and walked back to your room.

“I’m so confused right now. Bucky isn’t the Winter soldier anymore.” The former assassin heard Steve talking in your room. That asshole is trying to get out of it, he thought. Bucky stormed into the room and picked your ex up by his shirt collar and pushed him against the wall, probably bruising the guy's back.

“You listen to me. Don’t ever touch Y/N, don’t ever go near her, don’t ever talk to her, you completely leave her life and your lucky I’m not killing you right here and now,” Bucky’s metal hand wrapped around his throat tightly but not enough to kill him. Steve walked over to Bucky and put his hand on the soldier’s shoulder.

“Buck, I know what happened, I walked in on you hugging Y/N, I can deal with him,” The super-soldier released his hand and the asshole dropped to the ground, moaning in agony. As long as Bucky had his way, this man was never going to touch or see you again.

~

You shot up from the pillow in a cold sweat and your hands gripped the sheets. Bucky dropped his book and tried to calm you down. Your hands stopped shaking as soon as you realized you were in Bucky’s room. His metal fingers drew circles on your back while his other hand was cupping your face.

“Doll, it’s okay. You’re alright.” You sat on his lap and rested your chin on his shoulder. Bucky leaned back against the headboard and started running his hands through your hair again.

“Please don’t let him Bucky,” You mumbled. You had a nightmare that changed what had happened that evening. Instead of Bucky getting him off of you, he let your ex continue. You knew Bucky would never do that, but it still scared the living daylights out of you. Your hands found his dog tags and you started fiddling with them to distract you.

“I won’t let him have you, doll,” He lightly kissed your neck, not leaving any marks since he didn’t want to overstep your boundaries. He watched your fingers play with his dog tags and took them off. You blushed when he put them around your neck. “Listen to my heartbeat, just focus on that doll,”

[faofinn]

17. Syncope/Fainting

@sicktember

Fao wasn’t sure how long he’d been awake. Too long, probably. He’d done a full shift at work with overtime, , gotten home, and then gotten caught up in some stupid emergency from a job gone wrong. He’d worked through the night patching people up, even taken one of the lads into their small operating theatre. In truth they’d all been up, all hands on deck to keep the basement well enough staffed to look after everyone. After that, he’d spent hours typing up notes and taking regular obs. Their beds were totally full, which was actually quite unusual for them. 

He’d tried to get some sleep when he could, but had managed probably less than half an hour before the nightmares started. So he gave up, dragging himself out of bed and back downstairs. He smoked a cigarette (or two) and then headed back into the kitchen. He was running on empty. Less than empty, really. He had nothing left, and yet he still couldn’t sleep. He’d been on and off dizzy for hours, too, and the cigarettes hadn’t made it any better. Maybe coffee would help. He knew he should eat, too, but the tiredness made him nauseous, and he couldn’t face it. He leaned against the counter as he waited for the coffee machine, closing his eyes against the slightly spinning room. 

Harrison had had a slightly better night, but only just. He'd managed to get a few hours sleep more than Fao, but still not enough.

He glanced over at him as he made his coffee, frowning at the state of him. "You look like shit."

“Cheers, Hars.” He muttered. 

"Just telling you the truth." He shrugged. "Steve chewed me out for not doing it the other day. Turning over a new leaf and all that bullshit."

“Steve told you off for being nice?”

"For lying, I'm not going to go against his wishes." Harrison smirked. "He'll soon see it's a bad decision of his."

“Have you slept at all?” Fao asked tiredly. 

"Had an hour or two. Kept hearing you wander around."

“Think I got twenty minutes before the nightmares woke me. Kept nudging Ely in the ribs so I gave up and got up so she could sleep.”

"You need something yourself too, though. We need your skills."

“My skills got me into this mess.”

"Yeah, I know."

“It's all well and good you guys need me. But I'm the only fucking useful surgeon you have.”

"Steve's not too bad."

“He’s good, but how many neuro cases do we actually have?” He grumbled.

"Finn." He laughed. "He's always in. He's good enough as a general."

“Mm.”

"He doesn't kill people."

“He kills people all the fucking time.” Fao said tiredly. He really did feel like shit.

"But on purpose."

“Yeah.” He murmured, turning to pick up his coffee.

"He's more careful than that." Harrison continued. "If he wanted you dead, you'd be dead."

“I know that.”

"And he's smart enough to operate too."

“An’ I’m not?”

"You said you were the only one."

“Well, he's not gensurg, so…”

"No, but he can operate." He said, waving his toast around.

Fao sipped his coffee, feeling unsteady. “So could you.”

"Fuck that."

“Would help.”

"I'm not doing that shit. I can do the anaesthetic side, that's more than enough."

“How are you so… So alive?”

"The six energy drinks I've downed helped.'

He wrinkled his nose. “Fuck that.”

"I'm not sure what's real, not gonna lie."

Fao hummed, suddenly feeling much worse. He'd been standing for too long, maybe, because he went from a bit dizzy and unsteady to very dizzy and unsteady. The nausea was rising, too, not helped by the bitter taste of coffee on his tongue. He was hot then cold then hot again, and he groaned, trying to grip the counter, suddenly aware he was going to faint. 

Harrison glanced up. "Are you okay?"

Fao shook his head, as his legs went out from under him and everything went black. 

Harrison didn't move for a second, swallowing his toast. "So, no."

He rolled his eyes as he stood, moving over to Fao. He gave him a quick check over, rolling him onto his side to wait.

Fao stirred after a moment or two, groaning. “Ow.” He grumbled. 

"You hurting anywhere?"

Fao thought for a moment. Everywhere ached, but what was worse? “Knees? An’ my head, I think.”

"Safe to move? Or do I need to get someone to help?"

“‘M okay.”

"Oh, so that's why you're lying on the floor covered in coffee and shards of ceramic."

“My mug.” He whined. “I can move.”

"We can get you a new one." He murmured, rubbing his shoulder. "It'll be okay."

“Help me sit?”

"Alright, slowly, okay?" He told him, shuffling so he could sit against his chest.

Fao moved, pushing himself up to sit, careful of the shattered mug all over the floor. The movement made him groan, the room spinning, and he leaned heavily against Harrison. 

"That's it. Deep breaths, yeah? Just relax." He murmured, rubbing his arm. 

“Sorry.”

"You don't need to apologise." 

“Fainted.” He said. “An’ now you're on the floor wit’ me.”

"You could have just asked if you wanted me on the floor." He tried to joke. "Though I'm not sure the kitchen is the right place for it."

Fao sighed, resting his head back against Harrison’s shoulder. “God, I’m tired.” 

Harrison pressed a gentle kiss to his hair. "I'm not surprised. Do you feel ready to stand? We can go to bed."

“Mm, can try.”

They stood, Fao gripping tightly onto Harrison. He swayed a little, but stayed upright. Slowly and carefully, the pair of them headed upstairs. Harrison shepherded Fao into bed, and muttered something to Ely once he got him settled. She just tutted, and rolled over to fuss over her boyfriend, thanking Harrison for looking after him. Fao was out like a light, the exhaustion finally catching up with him.

[heli0s-writes]

lights up*

A/N: Stucky (primarily Steve)/Reader. 2k words of idkwhatthisisi’msorry. There was a prompt from six months ago that I wrote this for but I lost the message and I can’t remember! All mistakes are my own, please stop reading if you are not 18+

brooklyn after dark masterlist

You wake up in scattered shock.

Knee-jerk reaction to fast hands sliding between your thighs, fingers carelessly ticking sensitive skin.

You wake up to a groggy voice, slurred with sleep and raspy-raw.

���Baby,” it croaks from between your legs, “Honey, sweetheart, sugar. Please, please, please let me eat your pussy.”

Wha—

A few disbelieving blinks as you scrabble for your bearings—can’t see shit—still dark—head throbbing.

“Oh god, I wanna sosososo bad,” and then hands are between your knees, spreading your legs apart. “So… damn... tasty. Uh-huh… Come to daddy.”

Who the fuck is—damn it, Bucky.

In the dead hour of four-something when nothing should be moving so intentionally, an unsteady moan tumbles out of him when he starts groping for your ass.

“Buck!” You whisper, kicking your leg to shake him off. Grabbing the covers with one hand, you reach under with the other, swatting his head and trying to get a firm hold on him. Slippery fucking man.

He pauses for a second before his body goes limp, half hanging off the foot of the bed and you groan at his weight. Idiot boy. Two hundred pounds of horny somnambulist dropping like an anchor on your poor legs.

Fiddling now with how to get him back up to his regular spot, you try to do it quietly, the warmth radiating next to your left shoulder a compelling incentive. Even with your wits barely about you, you know better than to wake—

“Whassit? Whas goin’ on?”

Steve. Ah.

“Nothing,” you sigh, reaching over and stroking his arm absently, one foot tapping against Bucky’s waist to urge him upward. “He’s just sleep-talking again.”

Steve makes a groggy noise of comprehension. “Sleep-talking or sleep-fucking?”

“Just sleeping now. Ugh… didn’t mean to wake you.”

He’d come in late again—meetings and paperwork keeping him well after hours. Not even able to do it from home, which would have been nice. At least here you could make sure he was eating, or drinking enough water, or at least be in the presence of good company.

Instead, you and Buck watched a movie, took a few rounds of shots (because he likes the taste and how you look dancing all over the coffee table), fooled around in the kitchen, and turned in around two—Steve nowhere in sight. Some jobs were Captain-Only, which meant you’d have to make peace with being useless.

That’s generally not a task that goes over well. The amount of untamed energy Bucky exudes without Steve’s guidance is… close to being categorized as a natural disaster and trying to stay up with him is always a double-edged sword. Lots of fun, sure, but he requires less sleep than you do and can finagle you into getting piss drunk with a single smirk.  

“Wish you’d been more responsible.” Bone-tired and Steve’s still bossy. His arm is heavy as it snakes over your tummy. “You know he needs direction.”

“Hey, I tried.”

“Issat right? That why your panties’re on the counter? Shirt in the sink, too. Come home close to four and still gotta clean up after the two of you.”

His raspy breath tickles, plump lips crushed just below your ear—enough to start a chain reaction of shudders.

“Go back to sleep,” you huff, embarrassed. It was only a few hours ago so your head’s still a bit fuzzy—vague memory of playful touches before hearing, hop up, baby, from Bucky. And you, tittering and zealous the whole way, kissing him like he’d never been kissed before.

YouTube blinking on the T.V., stuck on some ad because the streaming’s a snail’s pace from when Steve set up the internet and tried to pinch pennies at the same time. Bucky’s specially crafted “Wine, Dine, and Sixty-Nine” playlist refusing to load even half a song afterwards so neither of you could spare your neighbors from hearing all the noises.

Hopefully the laughter was loudest, and not the primal fucking, or the crashing when you slipped off the counter and knocked Bucky on his ass.  

You giggle at that. Years and years together and some nights still feel brand new.

“Have fun without me?”

There’s no real jealousy in Steve’s voice, but there is greed behind the question. A single night away and he acts like he’s never been kissed either.

Your eyes start fluttering when his fingers curl around your hipbone. Je-sus. Hell. It’s too late—early—for this.

You grumble his name, asking him to save it for a couple more hours when your brain doesn’t feel pried free, but, Captain-Only mode activated and he’s not deterred. A bloodhound on a fresh trail.

The hand on your hip turns inward and you’re suddenly aware of him pressed against your body, that hot line of him, pulsing on your upper thigh. He tilts forward, one knee rubbing up your leg. Bucky stirs a little and makes another declaration about how he’s fit for the CEO position of Eating Your Ass, but nothing more after that.

“He do you good?” Steve wonders, apparently not giving a fuck about whether Bucky’s dead or alive down there and instead only worried about repositioning you, rolling you on your side, “That why you’re so happy to get me out of the house? So you two can fool around unchecked as much as you want?”

“Steve, you know damn well—"

His hand slips around the side of your neck, four thick fingers drumming over the ridges of your throat. “Watch your mouth,” he whispers, “before you get yourself into any more trouble.”

He gets mean without enough sleep. And no one would ever guess, but other than working over some poor punching bag that’ll never see the light of day after he gets his hands on it, Captain America likes to fuck it out. You and Buck have properly come out of a few sessions barely alive, feeling like two ends of a slinky that’s taken one too many tumbles down a flight of stairs.

You squirm as he palms your bottom with his free hand, kneading the bare flesh a flimsy pair of sleeping shorts can’t cover.

“Gotta be quiet,” he tells you gently, “Can’t wake him, can we.” Christ help you. What a time to play a game. You mumble under your breath, “Do I have a choice?”

A prod at your already sore entrance, and Steve says, annoyingly convinced, “I think you’ve already made your choice.”

He stills for a second when Bucky flops around on the mattress and then he starts pressing his mouth to your back, your shoulder, other hand holding you steady with expertise. It’s Steve’s favorite position when he wants to be in charge—you, writhing and turned away, usually leaned about 50 degrees and pawing at Bucky’s chest—this morning, feebly snatching sheets instead.

It doesn’t take any buildup. He’s achingly ready; you’re willingly wet. Clothes moved just enough out of the way and his two fingers slide upward, pushing barely to spread you before he quickly replaces it with something much thicker. It’s only been a few seconds. He’s too fast for you to get a word in edgewise, your brain still muddled, body cooperative.

“Huh,” Steve mumbles, slowly feeling his way into position, “A bit fucked loose, aren’t you?”

“Steve,” you hiss in reply, clenching up reflexively the same time mortification bursts across your scrunched- up face. “Don’t say that.”

“Hush, baby.”

“I’m trying—”

“Try harder.” And he’s evil incarnate, you swear. Satan himself packaged up in the neat body of a demigod. He rolls his hips slowly until the tops of his thighs are pressed against your ass, fingers holding so tight you think he’s going to spear right into bone. “Stay still or you’re gonna knee Buck in the cheek.”

You twist your head around, instead, shaking your chin free from his hand, hoping that once he sees your pitiful expression, he’ll find it in his heart to maybe not pound you into oblivion with bells on.

Of course, Steve’s not looking anywhere but down the line of your back and further to where he’s opening you up, bottom lip tucked into his teeth.

You constantly rib him about how he’s making up for all the years he spent with the two working eyes of a mole so now he’ll break his neck to watch. Bucky’s confirmed it multiple times to Steve’s chagrin, cackling at the way Steve goes purple defending himself. You love the stories they tell and retell; you try to spend most your time making up for all those years you weren’t there to find out.

Who isn’t in this relationship? Violently horny like teenagers, the three of you, spending every idle hour mishandling for each other like it’s the first time. Excitement primeval like animals in heat, apparently instinctual enough for one of you to do it in his sleep. Years and years and it still feels brand new.

The bed’s rocking surprisingly moderately for Steve’s usual pace, and it’s a bit heartwarming to know that he’s doing it because he really doesn’t want to wake Bucky, but he ramps up his game. He starts whispering again, meaner, hotter, the damn mouth on Steve Rogers continuing to give you hell this early morning.

He pinches your nipple hard, letting you gasp at the brief sting before he goes back up to your chin, your mouth, and then he puts the entire hand over it.

“Quiet. Not another fucking word out of you. Gotta teach you how to behave this morning, don’t I?” He’s working himself up, working you over, even pulling you back on him by the hips and then wiggling you up and down on him like he’s adjusting you on a saddle. Motherfucker.

Your toes curl, knees grinding, legs folding up to get simultaneously closer and away from him and it feels—it feels so excruciatingly good—the effortless glide of his cock, the burn of friction dragging itself out the more you wriggle. Whatever indelicate sounds falling out of your mouth are getting mashed back in, Steve ramming himself into your body, shaking your brain further loose.

He’s probably louder than he intends to be—you know how he gets when he’s close— bombs could be dropping two feet away and Steve Rogers would hear nothing but the roar of his own wanting, chasing it until he crashes into bits. You’re chasing too, both hands clamped around his wrist, arching your back to near breaking.

“Yeah,” he rasps out, “That’s it, that’s good, baby. Ugnn—back up on me, stay—right there.”

More uneven jerking, he releases your face and starts rubbing your clit, saying, you like it like this? Like me givin’ it to you good like this? And you’re shaking in his arms, the both of you tipping over the edge.

-

“I wasn’t serious,” Steve says later after a few moments, lips all soft and gentle on your neck, rather than fierce like before, “Bout you bein’—” you can feel him shrugging, “Y’know… fucked loose.” He whispers the last part like it’s a sin.

You snort, “You turning decent on me? After railing me to death?”

“You sound pretty lively to me.” He pokes your side, “I just… woke up and remembered how much I missed you last night.”

“I’m not going anywhere. You’ve got both of us here—shit!”

“Steeeeeve,” and the sound of it slaps both you back to reality. Sleep-smashed, more tipsy than any alcohol could make him, Bucky’s giggles break the steady pattern of muffled conversation. His vibranium hand pats around for a new destination, undeterred by the disruption of his previous mission.

You can’t believe it. He’s still asleep.

“Steeeevie,” Bucky mewls again, “Lemme— lemme suck your dick, sweetheart.”

What a menace. Your shoulders start quivering as you poorly hold it back, pfffftppblffpt’s kickstarting Steve into a tizzy right alongside you.

Bursting laughter finally wakes him up. Bucky yelps once, twice, flailing like a cat caught unawares and rolls himself right off the goddamn bed.

Two hundred pounds of newly conscious pervert wallops the hardwood floor and you’re sure the entire apartment complex—if they didn’t hear the ruckus last night—certainly heard it this morning.

[marvelmadam08]

The Nomad and The Princess (18)

Summary: You and Carol return to Earth after people start disappearing.

Warnings: ANGST (like a lot)

A/N: The last chapter to The Nomad and The Princess! Thank you to all the readers who stuck kept coming back to read and comment, even with the spotty posting times and dates. I will be planning a third and FINAL storyline.

A whole year had passed since you left Earth, since you saw the team, probably longer since you’d seen Thor. You had a few leads on where he was but you’d always just missed him by the time you got there. 

The closest you’d been to finding him was on Sakaar, his name had been mentioned along with the Grandmaster’s champion fighter, Hulk. You felt some type of relief knowing that they both left the trash planet together.

A year since you left both Steve and Bucky behind. You’d been trying to bury that guilt, throwing yourself alongside Carol and her journey across the galaxy. You learned a lot from her, and you were glad to call her a friend and partner in crime. 

Carol was panicked now, although she wouldn’t say it you’d been working with her long enough to know when she was worried. 

The two of you were having drinks with a few Ravangers, when Carol pulled out her transmitter, Fury was calling her back to Earth. Then one by one beings started to disappear, disintegrating into dust. Now the two of you were flying back to Earth hoping to you weren’t too late.

Upon reentering Earth’s atmosphere you’d realize that you missed it more than you admitted to yourself. From the air you see the abandon cars still in the roads, not a soul on the streets but the fear radiating in the air let you know they were still there- just too afraid to leave their homes.

“You alright, Ray?” Carol asks you

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” You weren’t entirely sure if it was lie or not, but now wasn’t the time to dwell on it “If the people went missing then the first thing Fury would do would be to find The Avengers... unless they disappeared too.”

“I’m sure they’re fine. We just need to find them, the signal stopped again.” Carol shoved the transmitter back in her pocket

“Hopefully they haven’t sold the compound in upstate New York.”

When you saw that giant ‘A’ on the roof of the compound, you were flooded with so many happy memories that you almost forgot you were in the middle of a crisis.

“How do we get in?” 

You smirked, eyes flashing an electric blue “I still have security clearance.”

You’re marching towards the entrance the moment your feet touch the ground, and override the security code on the door with a snap of your fingers. This time there are no guards to stop you, no receptionist at the desk, the whole building was just- quiet. 

Continuing on, you lead Carol to the lab, there was a tense energy in the air that nearly made you trip over your own feet, but then again that could’ve just been nerves. 

Familiar voices floated from down the hall, the palms of your hands still tingle after hearing Steve’s voice.

“Reboot it and send the signal again.” he ordered

 “We don’t even know what this is.” Doctor Banner pointed out. 

Your heartrate sped up, if Banner was here there was a chance Thor was with him. You concentrated for any others within the compound. You couldn’t feel Bucky’s yet... 

Carol and you stood behind them as they examined Fury’s transmitter, unaware of your presence. 

“Fury did.” Nat argued. “Tell me when you get a signal- I wanna know who’s on the other end of that thing.”

“We are.”

They all turned at the sound of your voice, that’s when you truly got a good look at them all. Bruce looked the same, with the exception of a haircut and a slight tan. You hadn’t seen Rhodey since before the team fell out, but you heard about his injury and noticed the braces on his legs. 

“(Y/N), you’re alive.” Bruce half smiled “Thank God.”

He excused himself from the room, rushing off down the hall.

“(Y/N).” Nat came up to hug you, Rhodey right along with her “Where have you been?”

“I took a wrong turn through a portal.” You joked trying to diffuse the tension

“Where’s Fury?” Carol asked

“Who the hell are you?” Rhodey countered

“This is Carol Danvers, she’s a friend of mine and the one Fury was trying to get in touch with.” You explained “What is going on out there? Where is everybody?”

“You mean you don’t know?” Steve stepped forward 

“I don’t think she would’ve asked if she did know.” Carol sized Steve up and down then glanced at you “Is this Steve?”

You nod “Yeah that’s him.”

“He is cute, where’s the other one?”

The not so subtle look Nat and Rhodey share, and the sadden expression on Steve’s face let’s you know that things were much worse than you thought.

“Let’s not right now, but where’s the rest of the team? Where’s Tony? Wanda? Vison? Where’s-”

“(Y/N)?” Thor’s voice cuts you off. 

He stood frozen in the doorway, taking in your appearance, you do the same with him. Hair was cut short and he was dressed in regular clothing, not the royal armor you’d gotten use to seeing him in. You were the complete opposite, your hair had grown out, and you still wore part of your armor, excluding the cape. 

“Damn, is that Bucky?” Carol whispered, in the silent room

“That’s my father.” You smiled tears welling up in your eyes

“Thank Vanhalla you’re still here.” he rushed up to you, trapping you in crushing hug “I thought I lost you too.”

You returned the hug as best you could “I’m happy to see you too.”

“What happened to you? I returned to Asgard, and you weren’t there, my brother said you’d ran off-”

You scoffed “That lying snake, I can’t believe-”

“Don’t speak ill of your uncle!” 

“You’re joking right? He ran me off Asgard, impersonated Odin- Oh shit Odin!” You gasped “He’s here on Earth, we need to find him and make sure he’s okay. And Heimdall, I haven’t been able to contact him since I left Asgard-” Thor hugged you again his shoulders sagging “I’m guessing I missed some things.”

“You missed a lot, Princess.” Rhodey said handing you a table with the profile of the the other Avengers “They’re gone.”

“Gone? What do you mean gone?” Carol asks for you while you scrolled through the profile

Sam... Wanda....Vison....Tony.....Strange....Shuri.....T’Challa..... Fury.... Odin.... Loki..... Heimdall.... Bucky....

They were all gone.

[simsadventures]

Gilded: Chapter 3: Power Over Me

Mobster!Steve x Reader

Summary: What more can you do than have a rad bachelorette party and then move to a house full of mobsters. It all sounds fun, right? Well, not according to your experience. 

Warnings: mobster AU, drinking, swearing, surveillance, angst, smidge of fluff, violence, mention of bruises, fear 

Word Count: 5737

A/N: A little late, I know I know, but I wanted to make sure the chapter was exactly how I wanted it. I keep thinking I will get to the wedding, and then some situations occur and I know I have to concentrate on them a little more. Than being said, I think we will finally see the wedding next! What do you think of this part? Did you like it? Is the reader a little less annoying? Let me know xx

Series Masterlist __ Masterlist 

< Previous Chapter 

The scene was supposed to be joyous, but, for some reason, the majority of what you felt was filled with sadness. Not for any particular reason, it was just the weigh of your decision finally settling in your heart and the realization hitting you that you would indeed be getting married in a week to a total stranger, who was a mobster, none less. 

You chose it, you had to remind yourself as tears fought their way in your eyes. It was just momentary sadness overpowering you, the feeling that your wedding wouldn’t be filled with people loving and caring for you, that the day would be more about showing off Steve’s power over the world than showing his love for his new bride, for whom he had none. And you would be there almost alone: no parents, no extended family, and a very few close friends. Whom you loved dearly, of course, and without whom you wouldn’t even be considering taking such a step. You needed them there, and not just the two lovable idiots you lived with. 

It was also people you’ve come to love during your university years as well as some coworkers, like Christy and Anja. Together it made around 15 people, which was actually a lot more than you had anticipated, but still. It would have to be Aidan walking you down the aisle, and just the mere thought made a choked sob escape your lips. 

The sound brought the attention of the room to you, and before you knew it, you were enveloped in a bone-crushing hug from all the people there, everyone telling you that you should be happy, that this was a good thing. Of course, nobody except Caroline and Aidan knew the reality behind the wedding. All they thought was happening was that you fell madly in love with Steve Rogers, and now you two were tying the knot. You even overhead Aisha say that you were definitely pregnant, otherwise, you wouldn’t have rushed into it like this. You tried to assure everyone that there was no pregnancy at all, but, of course, people believed what they wanted, and you lacked the energy to go around the room and speak to them individually, denying what they formed in their heads. 

It was Friday night, and you were in your apartment, surrounded by all those people who would come to your wedding. You sent a list of names to Steve that afternoon, and, after what you assumed was a background check on all of them, he agreed that yes, these 15 people could actually come. And when he did, you called an emergency meeting at your apartment, using it both as a way of inviting them to the wedding and as a kind of bachelorette party, where all you wanted to do was to drink heavily, eat a disgusting amount of carbs and pass out around dusk. Safe to say, all of your friends had been in, and by the time it was 11 PM, you were all tipsy, and people started to dance. Some (ehm, ehm, Caroline) even on a table, which was hilarious to the rest of you. 

The sadness came and went all evening, but you were determined not to let it ruin your night. So, every time you felt like it was creeping up on you again, you just told somebody and let them hug you until you were feeling better. 

Then, somebody came up with the idea to play Never Have I Ever, and since the tequila still burned in your veins, you agreed immediately. And so the game started. You were roaring like a pride of lions, each answer louder than the previous ones, but the most fun arose from telling each other funny stories. 

“Ok, so this one time I was blowing off my boyfriend, right? And you know how much I hate the taste of sperm, and he knows it as well, but this one time he really insisted on my swallowing, and so when he finally came, I squeaked and pointed somewhere behind him so that I could spit the cum to glass under the table, and when he turned around I showed him my mouth, void of any liquid, and he looked super proud,” your friend Naila laughed as she told the story to the question: never have I ever swallowed cum. 

The night was flowing smoothly, and soon, you saw that it was getting somehow lighter outside. And, sure enough, when you looked out of the window, you saw that the sunrise was coming in mere minutes. 

“Guys, guys! The sunrise is here. Let’s go to the roof to enjoy it,” you yelled even though half of the people were already fast asleep. The few of you who were still barely alive, which was around 5 of you, staggered towards the door and crawled up the stairs to the highest levels, and when you opened the last door, you had New York underneath you. 

You were wasted and exhausted, but the sight poured new life into you as you watched the early orange rays shine on one building at a time, waking up the city that never slept. It was magical, and it took your breath away. You felt your worries melting away as you saw a new day coming, and you thought it was a new day with many possibilities and hopes for you. You had nothing to lose, and Steve proved to you that he would, indeed, take care of you if need be. All would be if you just played your part and learned enough about Steve to be able to escape his wrath. 

The exhaustion then hit your body just as the ray hit your face, and you waved at the drunk group watching the sunrise, each of them in their own realm of thoughts, and soon enough, you sauntered back to your room, where you fell asleep just like the rest of the bachelorette party. 

A piercing tone woke you up with a start, and, for a second, you didn’t even know where you were, what time it was, or even what fucking century it was. The throbbing in your head prevented your brain from functioning properly, and so you rummaged through the pile of clothes next to your bed, fishing for what was obviously your phone. Gosh, how you hated the ringtone, and you reminded yourself to just mute your phone altogether because then nothing like this could happen again. 

You picked up without so much as looking at the screen and just sneered a harsh what into the speaker. 

“Well, good morning to you too, honey,” you heard Steve’s smug voice and rolled your eyes so hard the pain in your head increased. “Is this the way to greet your future husband? I don’t fucking think so,” he continued, and a considerable part of you contemplated just hanging up on him and his annoyingly sexy voice. 

“Steve, I have no fucking idea what time it is, but it’s definitely not time for you to call me and want me to be nice. Give me a few good hours of sleep, and then we can talk, ok?” You hoped this would do it, but from the silence on the other side, you assumed he wouldn’t let be just yet. 

“What happened? Did your bachelorette party get a little out of hand, and you went to sleep only after sunrise?” 

You gasped, shocked how he knew any of it, and for the first time, the fog in front of your brain lifted a little bit. You checked the time, and seeing it was only 9 AM, you assumed that asshole woke you up on purpose if he knew so much about your nightly activities. 

“How the fuck-“

“Language!” He yelled suddenly, and you flinched at the intensity of his voice. “I know everything, and I told you I would have somebody keeping an eye on you at all times. You’re only lucky the guy sleeping next to you is gay, you’d be in so much trouble otherwise, honey,” Steve spat, and the only sound you could muster was a long huff, as you regretted ever being born. 

“What do you want, Steve? If you know so much, you must know that I’m beat and all I wanna do is sleep, with a guy in my bed or without him. So, if you have something to tell me, please do, otherwise, have a good day, and I’ll catch up with you later.”

“We’re gonna have so much fun together, you and I, Y/N. I’m calling because I wanted to let you know that your room is prepared and ready for you and that your bodyguard will pick you up at exactly 8 PM, so don’t be late. Clint will also help you carry all things you need. I’ll send you his number so that you can be in touch with him. Oh, and honey? Take some aspirin and go to sleep, you sound like you need it,” even through the phone, you could hear him smirk as he hung up and let you on your own once again. Thank God.

“Who was it?” Aidan asked sleepily from the other side of the bed, and you just grumbled some response, not really sure if he understood what you meant, but when he hummed and patted your outstretched hand, you took it as yes, I understand you mean your future husband Steve Rogers, nice talk. 

The phone signalled you received a text, and when you looked at it, it was your bodyguard’s phone number and a directive, telling you to go to sleep already, because the dark circles under your eyes didn’t suit you. 

Oh, how you wanted to kill this man already. He got on your nerves more easily than anybody ever before, and for a brief moment, you wondered why he affected you so. You didn’t even know him, and you shouldn’t let him tossing you back and forth, but here you were, pissed because you could just imagine how proud he was of himself that he woke you up and told you what to do so many times in such a short call. 

Sighing, you got up from the bed and went to check the window to see if you could spot the nosy bodyguard ratting on you to Steve. You needed to have a word with him because he just couldn’t go running to Steve every time you blinked. 

Looking around the street, you tried to spot a strange vehicle, one that didn’t fit into the street you grew to know so well. And, sure enough, there was a large SUV, much like the one you had driven with Steve before, and you noticed that the windows were tilted. Since your apartment was on the first floor, anybody from the street had a great view right into your flat, and because you passed out totally exhausted, you didn’t have the time, nor did you remember to shut your blinds. 

You huffed and shut them now, cursing Steve and his nosiness because he wasn’t making your life any easier, and you weren’t even married yet. The year in front of you would be annoying and difficult, but maybe it would make you feel alive again. 

Shaking your head, you didn’t let the memories flood your brain as you strode back to your back, plopped on it belly-first and fell straight asleep.

“Are you sure it’s everything?” Aidan looked around your now half-empty room, except for the furniture that you knew you wouldn’t need. Steve promised to give you a furnished room, and you took his word for it, so you just took the essentials, like your clothes and sentimental stuff. Marie Condo would have been proud because you still managed to get rid of a few things that didn’t spark joy!

“Yeah, and even if I left something here, I could still come, you know? It’s not like I’m never seeing you or this place again. I’ll still be like a 30-minute ride away,” you smiled soothingly at him, but he just shook his head, obviously fighting all the emotions swirling in his heart. 

“Alright, alright. No crying. I’ll call you guys when I’m all settled, and Steve actually lets me be by myself, and I’ll show you the room, ok?”

Both Aiden and Caroline nodded speechlessly and then pulled you in a group hug. 

“You sure you wanna do it? We can still make it seem like we kidnapped you and take you somewhere to Mexico, or Argentina, or wherever he wouldn’t find you,” Caroline whispered, and you laughed through the tears fighting their way out of your eyes. 

“I’ll be fine, you’ll see. We will all have so much fun, and before we know it, the year is over, and I’m back here with you guys, having lived a little,” you smirked, and they nodded reassuringly, not really sure if it really was the best way to live a life, but they didn’t want to push you again. Your heart was set, and they both knew there was nothing they could do now. Except, of course, really kidnapping you. 

“Miss Y/L/N, we should go. The boss said we should be there at 9 PM at the latest, and I would prefer if we could be a little early,” Clint said professionally, but you could see that he was afraid of what would Steve do had you arrived late. You didn’t want to start this weird-ass journey by pissing your future husband or making him hurt his employees (you didn’t know whether he would actually do that, but just to be on the safe side, since he did cut off a guy’s finger a mere few days ago). 

You nodded and stepped from your best friends, looking at them and smiling brightly. You didn’t want any teary goodbyes, so you just showed them thumbs up and followed Clint out of the door. You knew there would be some tears when you left but didn’t think they would come as early as on the first step from your apartment. 

Fortunately, there weren’t that many steps to go before you were out of the building and rushed into the SUV by Clint. It was dark already, but you didn’t want him to see you cry, so you swiftly pulled out your sunglasses and put them on, not saying a word to Clint as he started the car and pulled it into New York’s night traffic. The lights around you were almost blinding, and for a moment, you were glad you had the glasses on, but then another wave of regret and sadness hit you, and you had a hard time keeping in the sobs. Scratching your arms, you stared out of the window and took a few calming breaths, telling yourself to get a grip because you were about to enter the lion’s den, and you couldn’t show them any emotions. 

You knew Clint knew what was going on, but he was gentleman enough not to comment on it. Still, you needed to make sure he understood this little episode was just between the two of you. 

“Can I ask you something, Clint?” You said suddenly and saw his eyes flickering between the road and the mirror, meeting your eyes for a moment. 

“Of course, Miss Y/L/N. However, I should warn you, I am not allowed to give you certain information,” he said formally, and you nodded knowingly. 

“Yeah, right. If I asked you to keep a little secret from your boss, would you keep it?” You asked and nibbled on your lower lip anxiously. 

He seemed to have thought for a second before he nodded his head in a manner telling you that there were things Steve didn’t need to know. His eyes met yours again before he spoke up. 

“I’m now your bodyguard, and if I think the information kept from the boss is in your best interest, then I won’t tell him anything. For example, you smiled all the way to the apartment, no tears and no sunglasses. Though, I think you should powder your nose and dry your face,” he smirked, and you laughed a little, nodding gratefully and doing exactly as he said. 

The car stopped exactly as you put all the supplies back into your purse, and you had a feeling Clint took a longer route to Steve’s house just to give your face the time to dry up and calm down. Checking the time, you saw it was 10 minutes before 9 and saw the relief on Clint’s face when he realized the same thing. 

“Alright, I will take you to the boss and then will get the boys to help with your things. We won’t go through anything, but if you need our help when you’re unpacking, all you have to do is text me,” Clint said, walking you to the door. 

The man you met on your first night there was standing as a sculpture at the exact same spot, and you wondered if he ever moved from that hallway. He did move towards you, gesturing to your purse, but Clint’s hand stopped him mid-motion. 

“She’s clean. I’ve been with her the whole time,” he said sternly and with authority, and when he saw the first man taking a breath to protest, Clint just gave him a chilling frown, and the man stepped down, hung his head in defeat and let you through. 

“It’s not a problem, Clint; I could have shown him the purse, you know?” You almost whispered as you walked through the empty rooms and hallways with Clint by your side. 

“They need to learn to respect you, Miss. You are, after all, marrying the boss very soon, and they need to understand that you are not a threat,” he gave you a curt nod, and you blushed a little. You didn’t know what it was, but the way Clint spoke to you with so much trust and respect already made you feel much better. You knew it would be an issue, so having somebody on your side was a huge relief already. 

“Thank you, Clint, I really-“ 

“Well, happy you two are best buddies already! Are you gonna braid each other’s hair and do each other’s nails soon too?” A voice snapped you back to reality, a voice you already knew too well. Steve was leaning against a door, his face stoic despite the mocking tone of his voice. Clint obviously tensed next to you, mumbled some apology and scurried out of the room, leaving you with Steve. 

You just looked at him and crossed your arms on your chest. 

“Do you need to be like this?” You asked incredulously, not really understanding why he had to be such an ass when all you did was having some sort of conversation with one of his loyal men. 

“Like what, honey? You seem to forget who I am and what I can do to you and your fucking life,” he sneered when he finally pulled away from the door and marched right in front of you. 

Your arms fell from your chest as you stared at him, trying to figure him out. Which, considering he was a prolific mobster, wasn’t the easiest task at hand. But you tried nevertheless and poked to see where was all this coming from. He obviously needed to be in control of every situation, always the centre of attention, and, you realized, it was probably this that pissed him off. You walked in, not really paying attention to him standing by the door but carelessly talking to somebody else. But his attitude was another thing entirely. 

“What do you want me to say, Steve? That I’m sorry I talked to somebody else and that it won’t happen again? You know it probably will, especially since you assigned Clint with the task of taking care of me and making sure I survive this year with you, which is really all he had done in the 40 minutes I have known him,” you reasoned, trying to sound confident but not pushy. You needed to show him that he couldn’t just toss you around like he might have thought. You didn’t expect him changing his attitude altogether for you, but you, at least, hoped he would go easy on you. 

He was seething but also thinking; you could see his mind going in overdrive to come up with something snarky and mean. But you were quicker than him, once again. 

“Will you be so kind and show me to my room? I would like to get settled in before we start talking about the wedding.”

“There will be no talk of a wedding. All you have to take care of is go tomorrow and pick your fucking dress. Everything else is being dealt with. I won’t need you tonight, so you can go and be by yourself till tomorrow,” he snapped and walked away without saying another word. 

Great, now you felt like you were grounded, and all you did was talking with somebody nice to you. You shook your head disapprovingly and headed in a direction you thought might have been your room, but after taking a few turns, you weren’t even sure you were in New York anymore. 

“Hey, what the fuck are you doing here?” You heard from behind you, and before you knew what was happening, somebody pushed you forcibly against the nearest wall, pressing their elbow into your neck. You coughed, surprised, clawing at the man’s forearms and trying to let him loosen the press because it was getting harder and harder to breathe. 

“I said, what the fuck are you doing here?” He yelled into your face, and you tried to tell him, but your voice wouldn’t come out. So, you just stared at him, tears filling your eyes before you heard a loud hey from somewhere behind you two and saw a man with long brown hair running towards you. 

“Sarge, this woman was roaming around here. I think she is a spy,” the man still holding you said to the newly arrived guy, and all you could do was shake your head and tried to make yourself look as non-threatening as possible. Which wasn’t difficult considering you were in no position to be able to even defend yourself had the man decided to crush your trachea. 

“Fucking idiot! That’s the boss’ bride! Let her go, you dickhead,” the man, sarge, growled, and you felt the pressure leaving your body. Which was all it took for you to collapse on the floor and start coughing uncontrollably, gripping your neck in your hands to protect it from any further disturbance. 

“I-I, I didn’t know, Sarge! Don’t tell him. I thought she was some fucking spy. What the hell was she even doing here all alone, huh? It’s not my fucking fault she came sniffing around stuff that is none of her business,” the man tried to defend himself, but from the murderous gaze he received from the sergeant, he wasn’t very successful. 

“Are you ok, Miss? Did he break anything? Is your head spinning? Are you feeling nauseous? Any of this?” He crouched down to your level and extended an arm to you, and you flinched instinctively, not feeling too sure who was your friend here and who wasn’t. So, to play it safe, nobody was your friend, and you’d be scared of them all, forever. Easy business. 

The man saw your reaction and frowned even more but was persistent when he removed your hands from your neck to see an already-forming bruise alongside your throat. 

“You need to talk to me, Y/N. Are you hurting anywhere?” 

You coughed and grimaced because, yes, in fact, you did hurt and that all over the fucking neck and even your head. Which, given the man almost crushed your fucking throat with his elbow, wasn’t that surprising. 

“I’ll be fine. And I wasn’t sniffing around; I was just looking for my room. I thought it might be somewhere here, and I would have asked if I saw anyone. But this place is like a fucking maze, and I was all alone,” you screeched, and the sergeant nodded and helped you to stand up. He was pulling out what looked like a phone, but you stopped him. 

“Don’t call him, please. I’m fine. I just need to get to the room, so I can put some cold water on it, have a drink and go to sleep. Please,” you accentuated and saw the man weighing his options before he put the phone back to his pocket and nodded for you to follow him. 

“I will tell him, just so you know. Steve needs to know about this, and we need to make sure you are introduced to the whole house the first thing in the morning so that this doesn’t happen again. But he needs to know. I will give you a few minutes to take it all in before I do call him, though,” he said with a resolution in his voice, and while you wanted to protest, you saw that it would have been to no avail. So, not saying another word, you let yourself in what was supposed to be your room and took it all in. 

The walls were this very soft grey, which you actually preferred to the cold white you saw a lot all over the house. There was a king-sized bed against the main wall, framed with two bed-side tables and two matching white and gold lamps. There were many pillows on the bed and a plaid, grey and blue, throw as well, making it all feel very homey. You could see a large closet, where you could have easily fit ten times the amount of clothes you owned. The only other thing in the room was a table with a chair and some drawers, where you could picture yourself working and writing. 

However, when you turned around, you saw something that caught your attention. An easel with a little table on wheels, on top of which was a palette where you could see yourself mixing colors left and right. You squealed, but the sound reminded you that you have just been assaulted and that you could admire the room later. 

You took your time in the bathroom, inspecting your neck and hissing here and there when you touched it carefully. You knew the sarge was outside your door, probably counting in his head before he called Steve, and you were actually pretty surprised he wasn’t marching in already. Just when you thought of it, the door to your room flew open, and you heard Steve and the man talking (well, actually, more like yelling at each other).

“Where the fuck is she? I’m going to kill Drax. I swear to fucking God, man. How is it even possible that he does shit like this? They were all supposed to be briefed, for fuck’s sake. Imma have Sam’s ass as well for this. Fuck!” He yelled and kicked into something, which made you frowned, and you rushed out of the bathroom. 

Steve spun around and almost ran towards you, cradling your face in his hands carefully and lifting your head so that he could have a clear view of the injuries. He was swearing under his breath, but you couldn’t help it and stare at him, wide-eyed. He was actually careful with you, sweet even as he took it all in, and when he was sure you wouldn’t die right there, he took a step back from you. 

“Are you ok?” He asked after a moment, and all you could was just nod and stand there awkwardly, scratching your arms behind your back. 

“Will you be able to find your room easier next time?” 

“No, we took too many turns. But I won’t leave this room till morning anyway, and I will learn to stay out of the way very quickly, I promise,” you rushed to say, not really wanting to meet any of his crew alone again. 

“You can’t be scared walking around here, honey. I will show you around right now, and I have already called an emergency meeting, and I want you there. This can never happen again,” he said gravely, and you understood this was probably his way of apologizing for something that wasn’t really all his fault. Well, he didn’t have to storm off and leave you there, nor did he have to scare Clint away, who was ready to show you to your room in the first place. 

“Is it necessary, Steve? If I’m quite honest, I don’t feel too comfortable leaving the room right now,” you quipped, but Steve wasn’t listening anymore. He just grabbed your hand and pulled you towards the door. Weirdly, you felt a little better having the skin-on-skin contact with him because, at least now, nobody would be stupid enough to attack you. 

You tried to remember the way and took in the details that would make you not lose your trail again, such as the red vase on one of the tables in the corner that looked just like the corner two minutes ago, but the vase was something you could remember, so you took a mental note of that and other little things that would serve for your safety, obviously. Because when Steve told you people would want you dead, you sort of didn’t expect those people would be in the house with you. 

You walked through the spacious kitchen and the adjacent dining room to find yourself in what looked like a meeting room, with around 20 men gathered and scattered all over the room. 

When Steve finally stopped, he let go of your hand, but he instinctively reached for you and pulled you against his side. You looked at him in slight disbelief again but didn’t say anything as he stared in front of himself till the room was as quiet as a freaking church during a sermon. 

“Let me make this very quick: however lays as much as a fucking finger on Y/N here, I will kill you, and I won’t give a fuck who you are. You were briefed that I’m getting married to the woman I want, and because somebody wasn’t paying attention to the fucking briefing, evidently, my fiancé is now sporting a black neck, which she will have to cover for our wedding. Drax, you and I will speak tomorrow, I was ready to kill you, but I’m a reasonable man, so I will sleep and think of your punishment then. Now, any questions?” He asked threateningly, and you knew even if somebody did have a question, nobody would dare to ask it now. 

And just as you predicted, the room was as quiet as before, and Steve waved his hand so that everybody was dismissed and they could breathe again. Just not in his presence. 

“Sam, you stay here,” Steve added when he saw one of his closest men leaving the room as well. 

“I will deal with him, Steve. I don’t know how that could have happened, but it won’t ever again, I promise. If it does, you can have my head, man,” the bulky man said and smiled warmly at you. 

“By the way, hi, I’m Sam. I’m like the muscles here, you know? So, if you need to pick something up, I’m your guy,” he said with a wink, and you chuckled but took his hand to shake it. 

“Nice to meet you, Sam, and I will remember that, thank you.” 

“Alright, now, we have all the pleasantries behind us, you can go back to your room and go to sleep. And Y/N, if anybody as much as looks at you the wrong way, you tell me, ok? This marriage might not be a genuine one, but none of these assholes knows that or should care about that. They should protect you just like they protect me, and I don’t care what they say. I can’t have my fucking wife scared to walk these halls,” he was still frowning as he was saying all this to you, but you could see he was much more relaxed than when all the men were in the room. These two, the sergeant whose name you still didn’t know, and Sam, were obviously close to Steve because despite the winks Sam gave to you, Steve didn’t make a scene, nor did he give you the pointed looks when others were around. Still, you were on thin ice, and there was too much drama for one day for you to try and challenge him in any way. 

“Ay ay, Captain,” you chuckled, and the corner of Steve’s mouth actually moved a little, so you took that as a good sign. 

“Alright, I will try and get back to my room and call it a day because tomorrow is an important day! So, nice to meet you, gentlemen, and I will see you soon, I guess,” you waved at them awkwardly, and Sam waved back enthusiastically as you left the men to themselves. 

“She is actually quite nice,” Sam summarized, and winked at Bucky, who just rolled his eyes at him in annoyance, having just enough of Sam’s antics for one day. 

“Yeah, yeah, she actually is, when she’s not talking back and challenging every fucking thing I say,” Steve complained, and it was a turn for both men to roll their eyes at their best friend. 

“Oh yeah, because you love when they’re meek and quiet, we forgot. C’mon, man, somebody fucking choked her today, and she was still standing here with her head held high, keeping it together like a fucking pro. I say she is perfect for you,” Sam said defensively when he saw the murderous stare from his friend/boss. 

Good thing Sam didn’t see you in your room because as soon as you closed the door behind yourself, the tears just streamed down your face, and small sobs left your lips. You were glad the day was over and dreaded what the next day would bring. 

Next Chapter >

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[zeldasayer]

Futile Devices — Chapter 5

A Javier Peña/Call Me By Your Name AU

gif by @pascalplease

Javier Peña x Reader

Summary: Everything has changed since your father’s book with Javier was rejected, just as you and Javier were getting close.

Warnings: SMUT — age gap (reader is of age), inexperienced!reader themes, gagging, praise (use of “little girl”), vocal Javi, squirting. Angst. 18+

Masterlist | Chapter 4

——

Vita Murphy was born on April 9th 1963 in Milan, Italy to American architects Connie and Steve Murphy, who met your mother by chance one afternoon at a market in town. Taking a liking to Connie, Daisy invited her and her husband to one of their legendary parties. Your mother and father loved to entertain and invite interesting people into their home for cocktails and Daisy's delicious cooking. Your parents celebrated every holiday, birthday, or life event they could think of, any excuse to dress up, string lights through the fruit trees in the back yard and drink in excess to your father's extensive record collection. As a child, you missed most of the parties, having been put to bed just as they were taking off, but when Connie and Steve arrived to your mother's 35th birthday after meeting in the market, and saw you sitting alone at your piano, Connie knew that next time she would bring her daughter.

Even at 13 you felt the pull that Vita had. You watched as she floated around your home, seeming even more comfortable in it than you were, stealing sips of wine and hors d'oeuvres before noticing you and asking if you had ever had your tarot cards read.

"It's my favourite game." You spat out nervously unaware.

Vita just smiled with a nod, "Yeah. Mine, too."

And from then on, you were inseparable.

"She didn't cry, she sang!" Connie always said about her daughter's birth. "It was the happiest day of my life."

Made in her mother's stunning image, Vita had the most incredible large eyes and long blonde hair she cut only once a year. Connie knew at a young age that her daughter was special, as a believer in the universe and the infinite lives a person could have, she knew her daughter was an old soul put on Earth to love and protect the new souls, the tired souls, those who were born somewhere and didn't know why they were born there. She knew it would be quite the burden for one girl, but she saw it quickly in her daughter that it was what she was meant to do. A healer, a listener, someone who understood what many feared no one ever could. Vita attracted those who needed her, and in that, unfortunately led to a large turnover in friendships. Vita was used to strong, short bursts of complete female unity, where she loved you undyingly and provided the support that you needed to pass through a difficult period of your life. But not with you, there was no passing through with you. Not even during your extended stays in the United States or even now that you are gone most of the year in college, could your friendship be weakened.

"It's because you were siblings!" Connie exclaimed in a tipsy state on a summer night long ago. "In another life."

"Do you think?" Vita asked, turning to you.

You believed in Vita and her mother's cosmic knowing, and relied on it more than you were willing to admit. "Of course."

"You were brother and sister." Connie said before taking a sip of her wine, and going quiet.

She always goes quiet — one moment she will tell you how your whole life is going to be and the next, just as she's about to get into the details, she switches off without any explanation, claiming she "doesn't really know this stuff, anyway."

It always makes Vita roll her eyes, because she knows that's not the case for she is just like her mother. Vita saw everything and found people she couldn't read extremely frustrating. Vita has this otherworldly understanding of people and a patience unmatched by anyone you have ever met. She knows how devastating it can be to be seen, but how crucial in life it is to not only be understood, but accepted. Vita also knew how often you spent up in your head, in your make believe world where nothing could hurt you. How your lust for life was so consuming it left you unable to move, too afraid to start because it always felt like you were doing it on your own. Your best friend once told you with tears in her eyes that she wished she knew what planet you were from so you would have the peace of mind that you weren’t completely alone, and you thanked her because sometimes that is enough.

Vita is the human embodiment of home.

So why can't you tell her what is going on? Why does your throat close up every time you want to talk about Javier in any capacity? Why does your throat close up when you think about Javier at all? A part of you wants to run barefoot straight to Vita’s house and up to her room, beg her to help you understand your own emotions. Why are you so enamored by a man who always makes it so hard to breathe? How he manages to make you so hyper aware of your movements, yet he isn't even looking at you. How he's never there when you want him but you would drop everything to be close to him once more. You would drop everything just to be what he wanted again and it makes you sick to your stomach. It's like watching yourself at 15 all over again, when you believed the most important thing you could be was desired. Hell is the mind of a fifteen year old girl, and you thought those days were gone forever.

The tension in the house doesn't make it any easier. You and Daisy tiptoeing around your father and house guest. The quiet meals, that used to be your favourite parts of the day now leave you cold even in the relentless summer sun. You spend most of the time, sitting across from Javier, staring at him. Waiting for him to look at you so you can ask him what's wrong with your eyes. To let him know that he can come to you, that you want him to. But he never does.

Christian and Javier lock themselves away in the library most days and your mother tells you they still haven't come up with anything new. You're startled every night when you're woken by their raised voices traveling through the halls and you hold your breath until you hear their roaring laughter and you know they must be drunk.

You don't see Javier much these days, but you don't see anyone for that matter. Resorting to lazy floats in the pool by yourself or reading alone in the cool living room to escape the heat. It feels as though, if you can't be around Javier you can’t be around anyone at all and sometimes you can make that make sense but most of the time you ignore the irritating notion that you may really be going crazy.

But what was supposed to happen? Javier would fuck you and realize right then and there he couldn’t live without you? It’s so embarrassing because it’s true. You can't talk to Vita because you're embarrassed to admit you wanted to be more and tonight after another lonely dinner where you might as well have been eating alone — you dumped your dishes in the sink and slipped out to the back gardens for your abandoned childhood swing set. And you finally cried.

“Fuck!” You scream up at the sky and you kick your legs back.

As you create your momentum, swinging back and forth you can’t help but succumb to your own erratic emotions and you wonder why it has to be this way. Why can’t you just be happy with what you have? Why must you always need more? Why is it so goddamn exhausting to keep yourself neutral? You’ve never felt sad, only despair. Never angry, only full of rage. You’ve never been embarrassed, you only know humiliation. And you hate to think this way because you always search for your brain for a time you were truly happy, but you always come up empty.

Something is always missing. Something is always missing and you’re always alone but you can’t even be upset because you do it to yourself.

It feels like you’re taking the world on by yourself simply because you are. Because you feel like you need to, this is your burden and yours only. You must suffer to be rewarded for one day you will be able to walk in the sun and be alright.

But to what end? When will you be rewarded?

You want it to be Javier. Just being close to him feels like the reward. The energy you feel just sitting next to him, those eyes you want to swim in, the perfect angle of his nose and the voice that drips from his lips. It must be him, but he won’t even talk to you.

You spend the evening locked in this thought, the concept of the reward — you can convince yourself it isn't real but your heart aches for it knows it is the truth. Which is why Javier is so difficult. He is the one and it makes you dizzy with excitement, but you’re not sure if you can trust it. There is this pull of doubt at the corners of every thought because he still doesn’t know you. Though he could. If he just said the word, you’d spill every story, every thought, every idea you’ve ever had. How you long for more. More life. More love. More sex. More understanding. To truly be alive, not just living. Who could understand that better then him?

——

You like the way the cold ground feels under your bare feet as you walk back up to the house in the darkness. You feel lighter, now that you’ve cried and the house that sits quiet and empty is suddenly comforting. This is your life, your home. Javier is just a tourist and he should be so lucky to exist in the same space as you. But maybe this is you just channeling arrogance as to not be so sad, focusing on what he’s missing instead of your desperate need for him to actually see it.

“Claude?” You hear from the living room at the first creak of the wooden stairs.

You tiptoe through the corridor and into the living room to find Javier taming his fluffy hair with a yawn. Your jaw tightens.

“I’ve been waiting for you. I fell asleep.” He says and you just stand there, crossing your arms over your light blue summer dress. “Can you come sit?”

Shit.

“I don’t know Javi, I’m tired.” You shrug.

“Look, I just want to apologize.” He says, standing up and turning toward you, “We had sex and I haven’t spoken to you since and that’s fucked up. I’m sorry.”

Your eyes widen, but he doesn’t see because he looks down like he’s ashamed. You believe him. Gliding across the living room, you watch him in his usual ensemble — tight black t-shirt, soft cotton pants and his thick black framed glasses, and sit back down with him, on your side.

“It’s just everything with this book, I’ve never felt this kind of anxiety.” He says, his eyes cast down, resting his head on his fist propped up by the top of the couch.

You nod for you understand, but it hurt. “You didn’t even look at me this week.”

“I know.” He sighs, “I know, but I really am sorry. Please believe me when I say I’ve missed you.”

You look up at him, biting your cheek to contain your excitement.

“I miss you even while we live in the same house.” He says, looking away. His hand fidgets against his knee. “If you’re not at breakfast, or you spend your day here, reading in the living— I miss you when you aren’t around me.”

You wish there was a way to burn these words into your brain so you could have them at any time, to hear his voice say these things to you. This validation that he has felt the same after these long, horrible days of practically ignoring each other.

Bringing your hand to his cheek, you turn Javier’s gaze back to you, and study him as you feel the fine hairs of his beard under your fingertips. He looks tired, even behind his glasses you can see the deep longing for rest in his eyes. You don’t think he’s used to rejection either.

Javier leans into your touch with a soft hum and you could almost lose your breath from the tenderness. You want to hold him, bury your nose in his hair and tell him to rest with you. Just laying together, his big body between your legs and head on your stomach, until the inevitable rising of the sun. You can hardly bring yourself to imagine how beautiful Javi must look by the light of the morning.

“Come here.” You whisper, though it’s barely audible, as you rise up on your knees so you are flush against his side, looking down at him. Before you kiss him, Javier kisses you, and your hand floats down from his cheek to wrap your arms around his glorious neck.

Javi wastes no time, his one big hand dragging up your spine to squeeze the back of your neck, holding your against him. And with the other, letting his thick fingers dig into the soft flesh of your ass. You can feel the desperation in his skin, and you want all of it, this exquisite juxtaposition of feeling both safe in his arms but that he could also crush you with his desire.

What was life before this? Before Javier’s thick moans into your mouth, his heavy wet finger tips tracing. He takes up all the air in the room and you don’t stop him. He is everything.

You break off the kiss for a moment and remove his glasses. “I missed you too.”

“I’ve only touched you once, but I have spent every day thinking about you. Kissing you. Having you.” He says, pulling you impossibly closer to him. “It’s all I’ve wanted, every day.”

“Why didn’t you tell me.” You ask, and you can’t help the confused look on your face but Javier doesn’t respond. You search his face anyway longing for something heartfelt, like he was locked up in his head, consumed by his feelings for you, like you were. Instead, he kisses you again. Swallowing any upsetting feeling you’ve had since you’ve touched him last.

Kissing Javier is a soft pleasure all in its own, but you want more. More skin. More contact. To ache around him again. To show him how much you truly missed him.

“Let me take care of you.” You whisper, your palm trailing flat down the man’s chest. You get lower and lower, kissing along the beautiful exposed skin of his neck, dragging your hand down the soft black fabric until you reach the drawstring of Javi’s pants.

“Are you sure?” He asks, and you feel his body stiffen as he looks around.

You nod, pushing your legs out from underneath you so you’re laying flat on the couch, your face practically in his lap. “Just relax.”

Javier lets all the air escape from his chest as you pull on the pants and he lifts his hips so you can get them down his thighs.

He watches you with heavy eyes, his mouth falling open as you kiss up the underside of his length, hardening under your lips. Swirling your tongue around the tip, you rest your head on Javier’s lower abdomen lazily, feeling him grow even more in your hand as you stroke him.

“Shit..” He says through his teeth, smoothing your hair back out of your face for you.

You continue to take your time teasing him. Humming in delight as Javier can barely contain himself, thrusting up into your hand shamelessly. He keeps his eyes closed, hands in your hair and you can feel the relief radiating from him. He was desperate for touch.

“Oh, Javi.” You coo, as his head falls back on to the couch, fucking up into your hand and you swear you can hear him whimper. This feeling of power over Javier is absolutely intoxicating, to feel so disconnected from him all week then to have him almost pathetically trying to relieve himself with any bit of human contact you’ll allow him.

“Look what you do to me.” He growls. “Fucking your ha-and...”

Javier reaches around, taking his length from your delicate grasp and pushes you lightly into his pelvis.

“You’re so fucking — soft.” He grunts, tapping his throbbing head against your lips before dragging his cock along your face.

You smile, letting him. Revealing your tongue for a moment to tease him once more.

“Thought you wanted to take care of me.” He says, his voice tight and you feel his hand in the back of your hair as he continues to run his length along your face. Grinning as his grip tightens, he doesn’t hurt you, it’s just about the control.

“I do.” You moan, as Javi softly pushes and pulls your head in a rhythmic motion, just hovering over him.

“Open your mouth.” He mumbles and you do what you’re told.

Javier motions your neck down, pulling you slowly over him, taking just his head in your mouth. “Is this okay sweetheart?”

“Mhm.” You whimper around him, your thighs involuntarily rubbing together, searching for some kind of relief from the arousing pull of his voice.

“Yeah? F-Fuck your pretty mouth.” He grunts, thrusting up slowly, stretching your lips to accommodate his thickness. You close your eyes, focusing on the fullness, calming your breath to take him.

“Stay just like this.” Javier sighs, his other hand tangling into your hair to keep you in place and you hum in agreement. Then he thrusts — quickly like he’s actually fucking you and it comes as a surprise but the moan that drips from his mouth almost instantly is enough to make you squeeze your thighs tighter. You have never felt a high like this, being exactly what Javier wants.

You dig your finger nails into his thighs as he takes you, a blunt, bruising force to the back of the throat and you can’t help but gag.

“That’s a good girl.” He says, “Taking my dick in your hot fucking mouth. I love that sound.”

You gag once more and Javier pulls out to you gasping. Spit suspended from your mouth to his cock and you watch it for a moment before grinning up at Javi.

“You’re so fucking cute.” He shakes his head in disbelief, wiping the saliva from your mouth.

“I’ve never done that before.” You smile, looking down slightly embarrassed as you wonder if you were even any good.

“You keep saying that...” Javi’s voice trails off as he pulls your dress up to knead your behind. You love having his hands on you, playing with you. “But you’d never know...”

You try to suppress your satisfied smile, flattening your palms around the base of Javier’s shaft, you take him back in your mouth.

“Fuck...” he exhales long and slow, grabbing a rough handful of your ass before pushing you down on to him, taking him completely down your throat and keeps you there. Your eyes water, and your leg kicks out before he lets you breathe again, coming up for air with a cough you look up at him and he looks down at you like the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

——

Javier pulls you back up against his side, and he looks up at you as he’s slumped down into the couch. You wrap your arms back around his neck, fluttering your fingers through his hair and he nuzzles your chest, pressing his lips into your skin. You wish he was like this always, soft in your arms.

Javi hooks a finger into the top of your dress and pulls down, freeing your breasts, nipples hard in attention and he takes one in his mouth. Your cradle his head as he sucks on the buds and you let your own fall back slowly, relishing in the feeling of his tongue and his lips, the brushing of his moustache and the digging of his nose and how sweet he looks in your arms. This is too much, you’re going dizzy.

Javier helps you pull your dress over his head and his lips quickly return to your nipples. His big warm hands squeezing your bust harshly, alternating with his teeth scraping the sensitive flesh and completely pressing his face into your chest. Even as you climb into his lap, on top of him completely nude, his tongue doesn’t give up until you pull his face up to yours for a kiss.

He tastes like everything you want to drown in and it’s heady, like a force you must fight before it completely consumes you, but you don’t want to.

“Fuck.” You gasp, grinding your hips along Javi’s length, desperate for more.

“Oh, god.” He chokes, dropping his forehead to your shoulder. “Are you going to fuck me this time, sweetheart?”

“Yeah..” You whine, reaching between your bodies.

“Yeah? You’re gonna bounce that wet little pussy on my dick?” His voice shakes into your neck, and it’s such a contrast from his stern “Get on your bed.” from days ago.

You nod, kissing up his jaw in this sudden codependency, his need to feel every inch of you as you both fall back into the couch.

“Relax, Javi. Let me do this for you.” You coo, sinking down on to him. You hum from the incredible stretch and Javier groans right into your ear.

“That pussy is so fucking tight.” He says, out of breath. “Don’t move.”

You obey him, stilling in his lap and Javier lifts his head from the safe space between your neck and your shoulder and he looks up at you.

“What if I just held you here like this.” He says, almost to himself, his hands coming up to your ass. “Stuffed full of my dick and I didn’t let you move.”

“Javi...” You whine.

“Would you still be my good little girl?”

“Javi...” You whine louder, your chest feeling like it’s going to collapse, Javier’s fingers digging into you and he gives you two small thrusts.

“You love being my good girl, don’t you?” Javier whispers, pushing your hair behind your shoulders.

More than anything.

“Yes.” You gasp.

“I know you do.” He says, guiding you slowly up and down. “Just sucking my dick made this pussy a dripping mess.”

“I love it.” You groan as the sound of your skin against his gets louder as you work your hips for him.

Javier looks a moment away from possession and it just fuels you, for you have him where you always want him and you want this to be the death of him.

You still again, but only for a moment to steady yourself as you get up on your feet.

“Shit..” Javier sighs, before he turns you both with your arms wrapped around him, his back now against the arm rest and his legs straight out along the couch. “There you go, baby.”

You reach behind you, finding your balance with your grip on his knees and you pull your hips up.

“Oh my fucking god.” Javier gasps, running his hand down his face and you push your hips down slowly, watching him and in this moment he is really yours.

Fighting through the burning in your arms and your legs, you give him everything you’ve got. Mewing in the pleasure of seeing him underneath you like this, needing you like this. Submitting to the grinding of your hips and the wetness that aches around him. You wish you could see yourself on top of him, your chest bouncing, skin glowing in sweat so he knows exactly what he could have, whenever he wanted it.

“Your pussy is so fucking pretty.” Javier says, his thumb dragging across your mound and down to your clit, that is begging for attention and the moment his fingertip grazes the sensitive nerve your legs clamp together. But he doesn’t stop. Even as his length falls from your body from the increased height of your hips, Javier’s hand doesn’t retreat from the soft thighs it’s wedged between. Circling your clit over and over, your arms buckle and you hold your breath. You thought you had the power but even on top of him you’re just putty in his hand and he knows exactly what to do to make you sing.

“Are you going to squirt for me again?” He rasps, his other hand pushing you down into his lap. “I want to watch this pretty little pussy squirt all over me.”

“Put it back.” You gasp, trying to force your legs open.

“Yeah, baby? Do you need my dick?” Javi teases, pushing at your thigh to open up for him again. He finally eases his dizzying pressure on your clit and holds you just above his pulsing head, slick with you. Running his tip along your folds, you try to sink down on to him, but he keeps you suspended.

“Beg me.” He demands. “You know I love the way you say my fucking name.”

“Please, Javi.” You whine, grinding your hips into nothing. “Please, I love your cock so much, give it to me.”

You push yourself up and fall forward so your hands are on his chest, “Please, Javi. Make me squirt again. Only you know how to fucking do it”

“Oh, fuck.” He groans, pushing up into you sharply despite your yelp. “Anything for my good little girl.”

Javier pulls you down, flush against his chest, still clothed against your’s nude and he wraps his arms around you. He smells like amber and fresh linens as always. Summer. A sunset. The breeze off the ocean and wine. Safe.

His grip around you tightens as you inhale him, pounding up into you as he finds your ear, and his voice is like syrup, “I’m going to take care of you sweetheart. Going to make this pussy cum. You tell me okay? I want to see it. Want to see you fucking soak me. Don’t by shy, my good little girl. Give it to me.”

“Fuck, Javi.”

“You’re so fucking incredible. Taking my big dick in this perfect little pussy. Let go, Claude. Cum for me, angel.”

You groan lewdly and Javi’s hand comes down on your mouth.

“Shh. Shh. Shh.” He warns, and you sigh into his palm. Angel.

This pace is overwhelming, and as he’s restricted your limbs there really is nothing you can do but take it, trying to keep your thighs from clamping together every time Javier brushes that incredible spot within you. Your moans getting longer, from an even deeper part of your throat every time. Your core twists and tightens as he brings you there, unlike anyone else ever has.

“Javi, now!” You exclaim, barely recognizing the screech in your voice and Javier pulls out. His lap wet with you.

“Oh that’s a good fucking girl.” He says, kissing the top of your head as you fall to his side. “That’s so fucking hot.”

Your house guest’s impressive length twitches in his hand as he strokes himself, his nose buried in your hair as you nuzzle his chest in hazy delight and he keeps whispering, “Fucking you is such a dream. You make it so hard not to just nut in that tight fucking pussy.��

You hum, lifting our head up and kissing him softly. “Cum for me.”

“Yeah?” He swallows.

“Please, Javi.” You sigh.

“Where?” He asks, stroking himself harder.

It takes all your strength, but you slip silently off the couch and on to your knees. “On my face.”

“Jesus fucking Christ.” He says, getting up quickly.

Javier takes your chin delicately in his hand, stroking himself with vigor with the other, and you display your tongue for him, feeling the weight of his cock on it instantly.

“Such a good girl, letting me cum on your pretty fucking face like this. I don’t deserve you. So fucking— pretty.” He groans, with everything left and in this moment you have him, again.

——

You wake in your bed, and you know it’s late because you’re hit by a wall of heat followed swiftly by disappointment when you realize you are, once again, alone. With your arm spread out at your side, you know you are going to be met with nothing but empty sheets and you still feel it at the pit of your stomach anyway.

You sit up with a sigh, back to normal you suppose. Another day of existing separately, but together with only your lost puppy sense of self and a fascination for this man to sustain you.

Then you see him. Javier leaning up against your balcony door with his coffee, wearing only his pyjama bottoms. He hears you stirring and looks back with a smile, “Good morning.”

——

Tags: @pascalisperfect @thefinalgurl @we-are-like-a-timebomb @ssppoorrkk @headsindreams @kehrite @nerdyknightwritersblog @tangledlove27 @chipotle-pour-moi @jokersdoll @zea-is-amazing @someplace-darker @kaylaylaylayla @spacenerdsebby @forever-rogue @fionnthebandersnacc @colourmeinblue @longitud-de-onda @dogsinspace @spitmillk @staellula @crazinessgraveyardsandcartoons @leo-moon @mandoandyodito @bonkybaaarnes @sadthotsonlylove @ah-callie @astrolo-galaxy @lockedoutofmyotherblog @hayley-the-comet @boybalm @casjason @mrsparknuts @blushingwueen @ignimbritetcax @benakenalove @fioccodineveautunnale @exrebelshocktrooper @pascalisthepunkest @sav-a-nna @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa @solarwars @cumberbitching @rae-gar-targaryen @tabalugax @lokiaddicted @roxypeanut @ezraslittlebirdie @thisainttheway @none-of-your-bullshit @mand0-l0rian @assaultsofthought

Love, Zelda

[thosewickedlovelies]

AND THEY WERE WALLMATES: Banana Bread (part 1)

Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Reader

Rating: probably T for mature themes (implications of sexy times and violence). It will go up later ;)

Summary: You share an apartment wall with Javier Peña, but that doesn’t make it any easier to get to know him. You didn’t think your baking would be the catalyst (read: Javi is jealous that Connie gets all the extras).

Tags: Mention of blood; super vague description of wound care; alcohol; TW for Javi: you have FEELINGS bby

Word count: 2,791

A/N: I guess technically this starts at the beginning of season 1, but I don’t plan on referencing the events of the show, so imagine they’re working on things less intense than trying to catch Escobar. I found Javier really tricky to write for, so I hope this reads okay! I’m so excited about the future chapters I have outlined for this lol pls get hype.

Masterlist

---

You had only been living in your new place for about a month when you got new neighbors. You were glad for the company- the four-apartment building was fairly new, and didn’t feel very lived-in. You did your best to add some personal flair to your apartment, but it still had the effect of reminding you of your own newness to this place, your lack of any deep personal connections.

Your other neighbor didn’t exactly help with that. Javier Peña had lived here for awhile before you moved in, but that was all you knew about him; you didn’t speak much beyond your neighborly greetings and his insinuating smiles. He never hides his lingering glances, but nor does he make any other moves- you sense he’s a safe type, all bark and no bite (without consent). So you always amusedly but politely ignore the invitation implicit in your exchanges. They don’t seem to have a lot of depth anyway, as if he’s just trying for the sake of trying. Granted, he probably never has to do much more than that- you’re very aware of how attractive your neighbor is on the surface. You just prefer to feel a connection slightly deeper than surface level before going home with someone.

You learn more about him from Connie, who tells you that he works at the embassy with her husband, Steve. In “janitorial services.” You raise a bemused eyebrow at that, but respect your neighbors’ privacy and don’t ask further questions. You help Connie get a job at a hospital a few blocks away from the one you’re a nurse at and promise to help her practice Spanish.

The building feels more lively now, and you’re happy to have a confidant upstairs, especially one who’s more privy to the life of your enigmatic hall-mate. You don’t know if it’s the neighborly care you feel for your new friend or if there’s some other unconscious change, but you begin to keep an ear out for Javier. You do share an apartment wall, although you don’t glean much through it. Some standard kitchen rummaging, television noise, the occasional bedroom guest (whose enterprises you try not to listen to, but damn if the man doesn’t have a perfect voice for after-dark activities). The most noticeable thing about him is the odd hours he keeps: sometimes in tandem with Steve’s schedule and sometimes not, you can never predict when he’ll be in or out.

--

Little do you know, you’re not the only one paying attention. Javier has spent many an evening alone with only whiskey and the television for company, but now there are other things to stimulate his senses. The smell of your baking filtering through the wall, even lingering in the hallway the next morning. The sound of you singing to the radio while clattering about the kitchen. Sometimes he turns the tv down to listen and imagines there being no wall between your two homes. What would his life be like with someone to infuse that kind of sweetness and light into it?

He doesn’t mean you specifically, necessarily. If, once or twice, your face jumps to mind while he’s taking care of himself in bed, he thinks nothing of it. You’re his beautiful neighbor- it’s a fantasy begging to be played out.

But damn if he hasn’t been tempted to make it a reality. He gets to taste your baking sometimes when you leave extras with Connie, and one day she catches his brow creased in a frown, distracted halfway through a slice of walnut banana bread.

“Javi,” Connie repeats, trying to get his attention.

“Yeah.” Javier snaps out of it, looking up.

“You’ve been staring at that piece of banana bread for a full two minutes. Is it gonna do a trick?”

He decides to lean into it, see what Connie’s reaction might be. “Only if the trick is getting me out of my pants. I don’t know a man alive who could resist the shit she makes.” He scoops another forkful into his mouth to prove his point, letting the rich, nutty flavor remind him of other places. Homes. Real homes, made of people, not the solitary kind he lives in now.

She rolls her eyes at his crudeness, but agrees. “You’re right about that. I don’t know where she gets the energy to do this after hospital shifts.”

Javier hides his next thought with another forkful of bread and a noncommittal noise. Wonder if she’d have as much energy for it if she had a man to tire her out. It was automatic, a question he couldn’t help debating with himself. Surely no one who spent that much time in the kitchen could have energy to spare on…other pursuits.

Connie is regarding him shrewdly. He avoids her gaze, focusing on finishing his plate in large mouthfuls to avoid the questions he can feel brewing. But he’s not quick enough. “Has she always brought you extras too?” she asks. Too casually, idling with her fork.

“No,” Javier says dismissively, and it’s not quite a scoff. “She wasn’t here long before you showed up. We’re not as close as you two.” Understatement. Did he sound sour about the fact?

Before Connie can ask any more questions he rises from his seat. “Well, don’t let me keep you. Tell Steve what I said.” With a nod of farewell, he turns and strides out the door.

--

One night you’re awoken with a start from where you’d fallen asleep on the couch. Heart pounding, you sit up, listening intently. You’d never felt unsafe here, but you’re aware of the potential dangers. What had woken you?

You hear a swear from the hall, and your muscles relax as you recognize Javier’s low voice. There’s a beat of silence, then a scraping, clinking sound. He must have dropped his keys. But then he grunts, and concern sweeps over you. You’re a nurse- you recognize the sound of a man stifling his pain.

There are long delays before each new noise that indicates an action. The doorknob twists as he grunts again, but it’s a moment before the key turns in the lock. It seems to take an age for him to get through the door; his motions sound clumsy before he closes it. Safe in the privacy of his home, so he thinks, he lets out a longer sigh, the pain and exhaustion now obvious in the sound. But you can hear his fumbling through the wall, and you worry your lip between your teeth. It is your place to go see if he’s alright?

Finally you decide that it is. You’re his neighbor and a healthcare professional, and it is your professional opinion that he sounded in-pain enough to warrant a check-up. Plus, you heard him that way before he got inside, you reason. So it’s not as if you were just being snoopy through the wall.

Just in case, though, you grab some muffins you made earlier as a backup excuse (once again mentally thanking whoever left the cookbook in your apartment). 11:30 isn’t too late for a friendly drop-by, right?

You knock softly on his door. “Javier? It’s me.” Nervous energy taps in your fingers. You’re never even been on his side of the hallway before.

There’s a shuffling sound, and the door unlatches. A narrow gap opens, into which Javier plants himself, and you immediately zero in on where he keeps one leg wedged behind the door. He leans into the elbow propped against the doorjamb above his head, while his other hand already holds a glass of what you can smell is whiskey. He looks like he would rather be anywhere but here at this moment. “Neighbor,” he greets dryly, a neutral expression on his face.

“Uhh.” You’ve never been this close to him before, and his appearance catches you off-guard. His usually combed hair is messy, waves tangling over his forehead, and he’s sweaty, the open collar of his shirt damp and the exposed skin gleaming with moisture.

Javier raises an eyebrow expectantly, taking a sip of his drink. His glances down at the plate in your hands, and it prompts you to speak.

“Hi, Javier. Uh, sorry, I know it’s late, but I thought I’d bring you some of these-“ you lift the dish “-before they come with me to work tomorrow. They’re banana bread muffins.” Your voice falters with your confidence. Your eyes can’t help but flicker over his face and chest, taking in the smear of dust on his jaw, the redness of the knuckles wrapped around his glass. Mostly you’re trying not to look at the leg he’s definitely hiding, which you can tell he’s keeping his weight off of.

--

Javier stares at you, not buying it for a second. His lips purse for lack of a cigarette to wrap around. He shifts the weight he has on his arm- damn, his leg hurts- and wonders what could have possibly prompted you to start bringing him baked goods now of all moments. “Why aren’t you bring those to Connie’s?” Like usual.

“Um, well-“ He sees your gaze finally drop to the leg he’s kept out of view, and too late remembers who got Connie the hospital job.

“I heard you drop your keys, and it sounded like you were in pain,” you confess. “I’m a nurse, Javier. I can help if you need it.” Though apologetic, your tone is firm, face sincere as you offer him aid. Him, your grumpy neighbor who does nothing but leer at you.

Well, he isn’t that proud. Javier sighs, and opens the door further. Your eyes widen as you see the long slice in his pant leg, blood still damp around the wound beneath. “Shit, Javier, what happened? It doesn’t matter, shit, sit down.” You surge forward without waiting for permission, tucking yourself under the arm of his uninjured side and steering him toward a dining room chair. Where he’d been about to sit down down and tend to the cut himself. He supposes your apartments mirror each other, but your familiar reaction to the layout still surprises him.

“Whoa, hey, watch the whiskey,” he exclaims, flailing out the arm holding the glass, taken aback by your sudden manhandling. With one hand still occupied by the muffins, you direct him solely with an around his waist and your shoulder propped under his armpit. He couldn’t have resisted if he tried. If it weren’t for the fiery pain in his leg, your hold would have him feeling a very different kind of heat.

You give him a look that says you won’t be fooled by his blustering as you deposit him onto the chair and the plate on the table. “May I?” you ask, kneeling, hands hovering above his wound.

“Oh, now you’re asking permission?” He scoffs in disbelief but waves a hand in consent, leaning back in the seat.

You scoff right back at him. “Look, I see blood, I make the macho men sit, okay? Why didn’t you go to a hospital with this?”

Javier studies you as you carefully lift the denim to peer at the cut on his thigh. He takes a sip of whiskey to buy time (as well as dull the stinging pain). You’ve put on a robe over what looks like pajamas, but you seem too alert to have just dragged yourself from bed. And yet...was that a pillow mark on your cheek? Just there, arcing from your temple to your jaw…

“Javier?" you're looking up at him, a touch of confusion on your face.

“Did I wake you up?” he hears himself asking.

Her gaze drops again. “No,” you answer. “Well, yes, but I fell asleep on the couch, so it was a good thing.”

Ah, that explained the pillow mark.

Finally you stand. Your hands rest on your hips, heedless of your fingertips smudged red with his blood. “It doesn’t actually look too bad. I have enough supplies here to fix you up. You stay here, take off your pants if you can manage it by yourself, and I’ll be right back.” And with that you whisk away, robe swishing through his front door.

Javier remains where he is, a bit stunned by this turn of events, your sudden insertion into his life. He shakes his head. Maybe whiskey and blood loss shouldn’t go together. He tosses back the rest of his glass anyway in order to wrangle off his jeans.

By the time you return, he feels more composed, if rather uncomfortably vulnerable, sitting in just his boxers with a bloody slice across his thigh. He watches silently as you arrange various medical supplies on the table and pull up a chair across from him. You perch on the edge of it and look at him before doing anything else. “Are you gonna tell me how you got this?”

He’s not about to tell you it was a fluke accident during one of Carillo's interrogations. Somehow, while his back was turned, the guy got free and tried to escape, swinging a knife wildly as he hurled past Javier. The cut was long, ugly, but shallow. He’d live. He couldn’t say the same for the man who delivered it.

--

Javier considers his answer. “Can’t,” he says. “It’s better if you don’t know.” His gaze skitters away as he speaks.

He works for the government with a poker face like that? “Janitorial work, huh?” you say dryly. Sighing, you reach for the antiseptic. “At least tell me what made it. So I can treat it properly.” You look at him steadily.

Javier looks back for a long moment. “A knife,” he says at last.

You nod, and rip open a packet of gauze. He sucks air through his teeth as the antiseptic sears the wound clean, but otherwise doesn’t speak while you work. Which is fine. You notice he’s drained his glass, and you empathize. Frankly you wish you had a drink yourself right now.

Once you’ve cleaned the cut it’s easier to see the damage. Which is minimal, thankfully. Most of the blood was probably from him moving around when it happened. You explain what you’re doing as you seal the wound closed. Only when you’re almost finished does he speak.

“Why don’t you ever bake me anything?”

It’s so unexpected that your hands still. You stare at him in astonishment, waiting for him to elaborate.

“What I mean is…christ,” Javier mutters. The unflattering fluorescent light overhead highlights the dark circles under his eyes as he scrubs a hand over his face. “You always leave extras of stuff at Steve and Connie’s. Never here.” With me.

You resume your work on his thigh, surprised to feel a tinge of guilt. “You didn’t seem like a baked goods kind of guy,” you reply, hoping you don’t sound too defensive. It was true, after all. Though you never got a sense of threat from Javier, neither did he seem the type who would appreciate domestic gestures of friendship.

He didn’t look offended, however. I’ll try anything once,” he says, the ghost of a familiar smirk suggesting he’s feeling better. But then he leans forward, all traces of smirk vanishing. “And your lemon drizzle cake was incredible.” Javier looks at you seriously. His face is too close for your level of acquaintanceship, but you don’t move away.

Surprised, you assess him anew, wondering if you’re catching a glimpse of the man beneath all the masculine posturing. He’s nicer-looking this way, you muse. His face softer, brown eyes wide and sincere. You hide just how pleased you are at this insight (which you’re sure he has no idea he’s giving you) beyond allowing yourself a small smile.

“Well, maybe next time I’ll bring you some.”

--

Javier can’t quite find another quippy response, so he just gives a small nod, finding it hard to draw back even after you break his gaze. He tries not to fidget as you place a final strip of tape over the gauze bandage.

“There,” you declare, your work complete. “That should hold you for tonight.” You stand and gather up your supplies, giving him care instructions as you go. “Got it?” You seem much more relaxed than when you first arrived, confidence in your work squaring your shoulders. It’s…compelling, much more so than your usual reserved smiles in the hall.

“Yes ma’am.” Javier nods, not having heard a word. “…Thank you,” he adds, begrudgingly grateful.

You smile wryly at him. “Goodnight, Javier.”

You’ve nearly reached the door when he speaks again. “Javi.”

“Hm?” Pausing, you turn back to him.

He clears his throat. “You…you can call me Javi.”

Your smile is much warmer this time, brightening your eyes, and Javier feels his heart pound. “Goodnight, Javi.”

[chicken-poncho]

Dot x Steve x Male! Reader Headcanons

God knows how but it just works

You met the boys while they were out at the pub after a late shift (Ted dragged the whole team there, put money behind the bar and left)

Steve caught your eye first, he was laughing loudly with Kate and some of the team

You thought he was just gorgeous and sent a drink his way via the bartender

You met Dot in the toilets, he was coming out and you were walking in

You kinda just bumped into each other and stood there looking at each other for a few seconds

It was so intense, Dot just stared into your eyes like he was about to eat you

Dot just grinned and pushed his way past you

You walked back into the pub and saw the two of them whispering to each other, you knew some sort of game was on

Walking over to the bar and they sidled up to you, one on either side

It soon turned out that they were actually together

They hadn't been together long mind, they'd started out looking for someone else and figured after seeing you they'd see if you were interested

You agreed, and the three of you left the pub and went down to a small cafe a few streets away to get to know each other better

It all kicked off from there

Dot, it turned out, was a prick with a (very small) heart of gold

Steve was the human embodiment of a golden retriever- fiercely loyal and dangerous when crossed

The two of them obviously worked together, but you soon were made aware of their fears about Hastings finding out and any consequential disciplinary action against them for seeing each other

They had to keep their own relationship underwraps- but they were happy to be open about you

After a few separate dates (the boys insisted on getting to know you on a one to one level*) they were happy enough to properly give it a go

*dot took you for a chinese, steve took you for an indian and you took the pair of them to a foodstand by your work which sold incredible pizzas and kerbabs

Steve had moved into Dots place before you had joined them so you pretty mich spent most of your time round theirs

They'd try not to spill too much about work (confidentiality and all that) but eventually they literally didn't care and would keep you posted on their cases

Dot was more closed off at first, but eventually he began to trust you more and open up

Steve tried to not overshare and tell you about things but he just couldn't help it

With Sam it had been very much 'she's in another department, mustn't talk about work' but then he'd get home and you and Dot would be sitting on the sofa and he'd be filling you in about any new findings and Steve just had to tell you about his day too!

You'd originally thought Dot was easily spooked- he'd check the locks, keep an eye out for certain cars and would be wary when you and/or Steve were out with him in public

One Friday evening, Steve had picked you up from work and the pair of you walked into the flat to see Dot looking stressed as hell and making a batch of chilli

Obviously you were confused but mainly concerned- Dot was usually so controlled in his emotions but you could feel the nervous energy radiating off him

Steve explained he 'just got like that sometimes' and jumped into the shower like nothing had happened- clearly Dot had at some point asked him to leave him be

You weren't having it

Softly approaching Dot and trying to make him explain whatever was bothering him

He promises to explain over dinner - hence the chilli

Once Steve was dressed and joined the pair of you at the table, Dot proceeded to slowly explain his ties and involvement to the OCG- how they had groomed him into the force, manipulated him into feeding them intel and how he was now effectively running the cutaway group

By the end of it, none of you were hungry and Dot was sobbing

He was so scared of losing you both over his involvement

You both assured him neither of you were going anywhere

Steve started asking questions, trying to figure out what the next steps were

Obviously you both had to keep him safe, but he could hardly step down from the OCG or you'd all be targets

You'd sat there, listening to Steve do his job and be a detective whilst you just sat, silently raging

Dot wasn't giving Steve much- he'd slowly stopped sobbing but his throat was horse from it so he resorted to just shrugging and shutting down any of the suggestions

'Mate, i can assure you I've already thought all options and there's not much of a chance of us getting out alive if i leave'

'but what about-'

eventually you cut in and told Steve to leave it

Getting up from your seat and wrapping Dot in a fierce hug from where he was still sat

He clung to you, softly whimpering and crying again about how scared he was and how he couldn't lose either of you

Steve started clearing the plates away, kissing Dots cheek softly as he walked past to bin the now very cold abandoned chili

Steve returned with a glass of water and tissues

You had to slightly peel Dot off your torso as Steve got him to drink the water

Steve concluded going to bed was probably the best thing right now- staying up talking about it and rehashing all the same ideas Dot had probably been had would do more harm than good

Seeing as Steve had already showered, he urged you and Dot to get cleaned up before bed

Dot was completely drained and you and Steve were scared shitless of leaving him on his own in his current state

Eventually- after Dot wouldn't physically let you go (he'd become very attached to your side) - it was decided between all of you that Dot was too exhausted to shower alone

You and Steve had to drag Dot into the bathroom and sit him on the toilet seat so you could undress him

Dot's lanky frame wasn't helpful, he was all limbs and his limbs were currently behaving like they were boneless

You managed to get him undressed and into the shower - Steve left to lock up the flat and get stuff sorted for his 10am shift the next day

Steve appeared at the door just as you were towel drying Dots hair while he sat on the toilet seat and brushed his teeth

The domesticity of it all- despite the obvious exhaustion from the evenings expose- hit Steve like a tonne of bricks

He really loved you both

Eventually the three of you ended up in bed, your hair still damp from the shower and Dot smelling faintly of Steve's bodywash as his had run out

Dot was in the middle of the three of you- Steve slept on his front and had to be up early anyway so you just clung to Dot and wrapped yourself in him

You were woken up the next morning by Steve kissing your head and whispering a quick goodbye as he walked out the bedroom

You sleepily admired Steves ass in his suit pants as he walked away until Dot groggily whispered 'somethings never get old'

The pair of you stayed in bed most of the day, eventually getting up mid afternoon and finding a note on the fridge from Steve saying he loved you both and he would get more milk on the way home

You let Dot use the last of the milk for his breakfast as a sorry about your trauma i really love you gesture

At some point, you had to do some work so you grabbed your computer and sat on the bed whilst Dot dosed off with his head on your legs

Steve got home later with a bag of Chinese Food and a bottle of wine

After a glass of wine, Dot declared he couldn't leave the OCG but he'd try and take a backseat and divert operations more away from AC-12 and Steve

You all relaxed after that and spent the rest of the night watching some shit film and pointing out the plot holes

That evening you had to leave the to go back to your flat as you had work on the Monday

Dot and Steve decided right there they had to ask you to move in

The flat felt weird when you weren't there- the boys obviously knew how to survive on their own (they'd been doing fine before they met you!) but it felt like something was missing

The next weekend you were over, they asked you and you accepted immediately

They helped you move all your stuff into boxes and then move it into their flat

Well, it was now your flat

The three of you consumating the move in

You woke up the next morning feeling sore and loved

Dot had been up for a while and when he walked into the bedroom to check on you both he could hear you and Steve laughing softly

He cracked open the door slightly and saw you and Steve all cuddled up, hair a mess and the duvet spread haphazardly across both your legs

Dot was, as he had been many times, struck by how much he loved you both and how much he was glad Hastings had put money behind the bar that one night

___

my heart hurts, but what can i say?

its 12:22am as I'm posting this- big love to everyone and anyone who enjoyed this fic!

drop me a comment- I'd super appreciate it 😍

[princesssarcastia]

first hp and now MCU *sigh*

sighs. anyway the reason the jane foster au thing is taking literally seven years is that I’m physically incapable of writing for the MCU without fixing everything I thought was dumb about it.  can’t just do a canon re-write because I Refuse To Condone XYZ.  The things I thought were dumb are many and myriad, but here’s one of them:

In Infinity War, they won’t destroy the mind stone while it’s still attached to Vision because they “don’t trade lives,” even though Steve made the same damn sacrifice, whatever.  But the thing is the avengers then immediately travel to Wakanda and start trading Wakandan lives for Vision’s.  They trade so many lives for Vision’s, and in the end it doesn’t even matter because they have to kill him themselves anyway.  SO all those Wakandans died for nothing.  They died for the aesthetic of the avengers having an army.  They died because no one thought through “yeah, T’Challa is totally down to sacrifice his people’s lives for one android he isn’t close with.”  They died because, let’s be honest, the lives of those random Wakandan soldiers meant less to not only the white main characters, but also the white movie creators. hmm. what could possibly be the impetus there.  mostly stupidity, but probably also some racism, lbr.

anyway.  all this to say what follows is a snippet where a) the battle to save vision isn’t taking place in Wakanda proper because the avengers don’t trade lives...other than their own.  In fact, it’s taking place in the arctic circle, where Wakanda has a shielded research station with no civilians that Shuri can appropriate to fix Vision without having her citizens die needlessly.  b) it’s just the avengers there, because they’re willing to put their own lives on the line for their friend and their principles. c) they’re using the mind stone as a lure to keep Thanos’ giant monster army focused on them, in this unpopulated place, rather than a city or a country.

you didn’t really need to know that, actually, because this fic snippet is about bruce banner.  explicit tw in the tags you may want to check for if you don’t mind a spoiler.  anyway, oh well, long walk for a short drink of water:

The walls shake with something other than the wind, and Bruce grits his teeth against whatever extrasensory response the other guy is having.  If he doesn’t want to come out to play, then he doesn’t get to raise the hairs on the back of Bruce’s neck.

The other guy.   After two years being trapped while he gets to play, maybe Bruce is the other guy now.  Maybe the Hulk—

“Doctor Banner,” Shuri says without looking away from her interface.  “If you’re going to help, then help.  Otherwise stop distracting me and get out.”

Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four...”You’re right.  Sorry.”  He turns back to his equations and keeps calculating what kind of energy source they can create here to replace the mind stone.  Vision may be able to survive without it, but it’s ridiculous to ignore that it serves a purpose in keeping him not just alive, but functional.  There’s a difference between surviving and living and the Avengers aren’t risking their lives just so he can—

Boom.

Dammit.

Shuri’s guard, the one T’Challa left with them—Ayo? Was that her name?—steps further away from them and speaks into her bracelet—kimoyo beads.  Bruce strains to ignore it because he doesn’t need to know what he’s missing outside, doesn’t need to know how poorly the battle is going for his friends, his—his shield brothers, Brun would call it, without him.  There’s no doubt in his mind Shuri could save Vision without him and there’s no doubt in her mind, either; he’s here as a courtesy and because it’ll go faster, at least.  Because he’d be useless otherwise, sitting there with his thumb up his ass while his friends fight and die without him, without them, dammit Hulk—

“Princess,” Ayo calls. 

“Not yet.”

“How long?”

“I don’t know how long, I’ve never done a neural reprogramming for an android before.”  Shuri purses her lips.  “Longer than this, certainly, to revolutionize a field that doesn’t even exist yet.”  She reprograms another synapse.  It looks like maybe thirty percent of them are done.  Thirty percent, after four hours.

Bruce glances at Ayo from the corner of his eye because he’s a masochist and he can’t help himself.  Her face is troubled, and so is Okoye’s on the projection hovering over her wrist.

“Ayo, tell her she needs to hurry up!”  The projection twists like the general has taken her hand from her face.  There’s a flash of silver, a war cry, and a brief, incomprehensible glimpse of something black and twisted and horrible.  It cuts out in the middle of the creature’s answers screech.

Ayo slowly lowers her hand back to her side, and Bruce tries to focus back in on his work.  Tries to focus on the math, on the energy readings, on Vision’s life in here instead of all the death out there, because if he doesn’t—

“I really am going as fast as I can,” Shuri says in a small voice.  Twenty.  She’s just twenty years old, what was Bruce doing at twenty?

Don’t go there.  Don’t go there, Bruce.  Shouldn’t have come back to the Arctic, that was just asking for trouble.

Focus.

What would happen if he lost it, and the Hulk refused to come out?

Focus.  Focus on Vision, on saving his life.  Save lives.  Save his life.

“So you're saying that the Hulk... the other guy... saved my life?”

Another explosion rocks the room, rocks the station, rocks the damn arctic ice pack they’re standing on.  It’s the biggest one yet.    “Evacuate the southeast quadrant.  All personnel in the southeast quadrant, evacuate to the next defense point.”  The intercom doesn’t even crackle as it activates over their heads and Bruce is struck by how odd that is; it’s almost more unnerving that the idea of the situation escalating to the point of evacuation.  Ayo pulls up a map of the station on her kimoyo beads and manipulates it, pulling up what he assumes is the southeast quadrant.

“That's nice. It's a nice sentiment. Saved it for what?”  

“How bad is it?” Bruce asks.

Ayo’s eyes dart to Shuri, who is nothing but relentless; he hasn’t seen her stop once this whole time.  “Bad.  They have breached the facility’s outer defenses.  Princess, perhaps we should—”

“No!”  Shuri all but shouts.  “I will not evacuate, I will not abandon this mission, we’re not finished yet.  Tell someone to come fill the gap.”

“Princess, if they have not already done so, then they may not have the manpower to do it.”

“Then call reinforcements!”

There are no reinforcements because this is a hail-Mary, vigilante mission and all the Avengers on-world are already here.  T’Challa isn’t bringing any more of his people into this, and Steve and Natasha and Tony would never ask him to.   When they fail, that’s it, it’s done.  And so is Vision, and this will all have been for nothing. 

“I guess we'll find out.”

Bruce pushes his glasses off his nose and pinches his brow.  He can’t even think about this; he’s thinking about it without thinking it, a glaring absence that lets you see the shape of it regardless.

“This wasn’t just a Wakandan station, right?  I mean, you guys opened it up to other countries for the science and information exchange?”

A pause.  “Yes.”

“Any military?”

A longer pause.  “...Yes.  Dr. Banner, what are you...”

She trails off as Bruce looks up.  There must be something in his face.

“Did they leave anything behind when they airlifted out earlier?  Weapons?” He adds, because there’s no use beating around the bush.  No time. 

“Probably, but you will find nothing there of any use.  Wakandan technology—”

“Is much more advanced, I know.  But you don’t really have any projectile weapons.

Ayo’s nose crinkles up in disgust, but is already turning back to her charge.  “Of course not.  So primitive.  Princess, we will need time to evacuate to the ship, please.”

Shuri cuts a glance at him, seemingly ignoring Ayo.  “What do you need a projectile weapon for, Dr. Banner?”

“Something desperate.”  He pulls his glasses off and sets them on the table.  “Stay here, Shuri, finish your work.  Save him.”

Bruce has never asked anyone else to risk their life when his own would do. He’s not fucking starting now, when the whole universe is at stake. 

Between him and Shuri, Ayo reluctantly lets the issue go, but he can tell if Thanos’ army gets a single step closer to her Princess, Ayo will throw her over her shoulder and sprint for the quinjet, mission be damned.  He marches out of the room and follows Ayo’s directions to the nearest storage area; the American one, as luck would have it.  Because of course the American team brought guns to the Arctic Circle on a science and information exchange program.  Of course.  A few M11s just lying around, lost in the hasty shuffle to abandon this place.  Bruce picks it up and just holds it.  Feels the weight in his hand.  Ayo was right, they are primitive; primitive and ugly and violent and only good for one thing. Another impact.  The station shakes again, and the lights flicker above his head. Now.  It has to be now. He doesn’t have a radio, but he knows where the southeast corner of the building is, so he keeps the gun in a tight grip and heads that way. Three corridors away and he starts to hear noises.  Yelling.  Screaming.  Gunfire.  Energy bursts.  The ring of Steve’s shield, the whine of Tony’s repulsors.  And above it all that same horrible screeching noise from those creatures invading their planet at the behest of a genocidal maniac trying to kill Bruce’s friends. Kill the Hulk’s friends. Louder, and louder, and louder, until he can’t even hear himself think which is good because he doesn’t want to think about this he never wanted to think about this again even though he did, a lot, like after Lagos and Sokovia and Sakaar. The team has driven them back from the breach in the facility, that’s good.  Wind and snow come howling in through the massive hole and Bruce shivers and tells himself its from the cold. Outside is...pandemonium.  His friends are like brief sparks of light in a sea of writhing, angry, violent darkness trying to tear them apart.  There are so many of them he can barely see the horizon and they show no sign of stopping. In the distance, he makes out Steve, locked in fierce battle with something that looks less like a bargain bin eldritch horror and more like one of those Black Order people. He’s losing.  Even Bruce can tell that. “Now would be a really good time for you to get angry” He’s always angry.  But the anger isn’t enough anymore. “Bruce, what are you doing out here?”  Tony screams at him, flying towards him with his hands still targeting energy blasts at the enemy.  “I thought you said the Hulk can’t come out, you can’t be here!  Go help Shuri!” Ten, nine, eight, seven—oh, fuck it. “Won’t, not can’t, Tony.” One breath.  Two breaths.  He squeezes the grip so hard it starts denting his palm. “Those are functionally the same, big guy, so get the hell out of here.  We got this!” “No you don’t, we’re losing!”  Bruce takes a short inhale through his nose.  “They’re not functionally the same when I can force his—our hand.” That finally makes Tony look at him, and Bruce doesn’t know if he catches it on his own or FRIDAY points it out to him, but he finally sees the gun.  He dissolves his faceplate and looks at Bruce with wide, exhausted eyes.  “No, no, Bruce, don’t you dare, Bruce!” He lunges, but he doesn’t make it before the gun goes off, the bullet tears through Bruce’s mouth and then—and then nothing. The Hulk roars.   Anger isn’t enough anymore.  Self-preservation will have to do.

[harringrovetrashrat]

I Want It To Be You

(done as a commission for a friend)

Billy wasn’t totally sure how to bring it up.

He and Steve had been dating a while now, spending pretty much all their free time together. Billy’s roommate had been shocked to see him sleeping in his loft last week, for once not in Steve’s single. But who could blame him? Steve was perfect.

Steve had whirled into Billy’s life, put him in his place, and pulled Billy into a whirlwind romance of sorts. If you could call sucking Billy’s dick in the backyard of a frat house romantic. And Billy could, personally. Not only was Steve perfect personality wise, sweet but with fire, he was the best lay Billy’d ever had in his life. He sucked dick like a pro, and Billy was pretty sure Steve’s hole was heaven. Plus, his thighs were soft as hell and he made the sweetest sounds.

But Billy was curious.

Steve had been King Steve in high school, according to his friend Tommy. He’d stopped by for a weekend, hanging out with Billy when Steve had to go off for an appointment. They’d gotten stoned waiting for him, finding it easier to talk to each other with the haze around them.

“God, you should have heard these girls,” Tommy drawled, grinning. “Oh, Steve was so good, he treated me so well. Steve is so handsome, he’s the only guy I ever wanna fuck again. He railed me into next week, I’ve never had dick so good --” He cut himself off with a snicker as Billy scowled. “I assume you agree.” Billy shifted, suddenly uncomfortable.

“I mean, I wouldn’t know,” he said. Tommy turned his head, letting it fall to the side to look at Billy, one eyebrow raised. “He’s always bottomed with me.”

“Huh,” Tommy said. “Not that that’s weird or anything, he loves a good dicking--”

“Do you think he thinks I think he wants to bottom so he never asked?” Billy said, worried. Steve was proud, was out, but Billy knew he’d had trouble with boyfriends in the past. Boys who couldn’t see past Steve’s parts to who he actually was. Who let that dictate how they saw him. Billy liked to top, loved the feeling of someone squeezing around him, but he’d been curious about bottoming. Wondered how it felt.

Steve had never suggested it, so Billy hadn’t thought to bring it up. But now…

“Imma need you to repeat that,” Tommy said. “I’m too stoned to follow whatever that was.”

“Like,” Billy smacked his lips, leaning forward to take a few gulps of water. “Like do you think Steve is bottoming ‘cause he thinks he has to? ‘Cause like, it’s great, don’t get me wrong but…” Tommy nodded, patting Billy’s shoulder.

“Steve doesn’t do anything he doesn’t want to. Not after his last boyfriend. Honestly, he’d kinda shied away from guys for a while, so I was surprised when he mentioned you.” Tommy smiled, soft and gentle. “He really likes you, you know. Thinks you’re the bees knee .” Billy rolled his eyes, but couldn’t hide his blush. “You know, you could just ask him about it.”

“Shut up,” Billy replied, smiling as Steve entered his dorm. He paused, eyebrow raising.

“You two having fun?” He shut the door, placing the towel Tommy and Billy had forgotten about into the crack at the bottom.

They’d all smoked together after and Billy had forgotten the conversation until later. Until he was laying down to sleep and it all came back. He had laid there, wide awake, listening to his roommate snore, thinking about Steve. About Steve fucking him with his long fingers, slow and sensual. About Steve fucking him with a dildo, going all King on him the way Billy would never admit got him going better than anything else. He’d come embarrassingly fast at the idea of riding Steve.

Now all he had to do was ask.

But he still couldn’t get the words out. Couldn’t find a way to bring it up that didn’t make him sweat a little. Didn’t make his stomach do flops.

It was fitting then, that he blurted it out while Steve was talking about his English homework.

“What’s it like bottoming?” Billy said, wincing as his voice came out more of a shout than he’d like. Steve just blinked, eyebrows shooting up.

“It’s nice,” Steve said, slowly. “Kinda weird at first, but, I mean, it eventually feels really good.” Steve trailed his fingers along Billy’s arm lightly, making goosebumps rise on his arms. “Not that I don’t wanna talk about it or anything, but why?” Billy blushed, looking away and chewing on his thumb with a shrug.

“Tommy mentioned that you uh, you had a reputation at school--”

“Tommy running his mouth again,” Steve groaned. “That fucking--”

“And I kinda wanted to try it? With you?” Billy couldn’t look at Steve. “I’ve never really trusted anyone enough, but I’m curious and you’re supposedly really good, and--”

“Whoa whoa,” Steve said, grabbing Billy’s cheeks and turning his face so he could look Steve in the eye. Steve’s eyes were wide, pupils blown, a light flush on his cheeks. “Are you serious? You really-- I mean I figured you’d rather top.” Billy shrugged.

“I like topping, but I mean… I’ve never tried bottoming before and I’d really kinda like it to be you. That tops me. First.” Steve inhaled sharply through his nostrils, catching his bottom lip with his teeth, slowly letting it pop out.

“Fuck,” he breathed. “Yeah. Yeah let’s-- Let’s plan a night.”

“We can’t just--”

“We’re gonna be fully sober, Billy,” Steve said. “And there’s kinda some prep that goes into bottoming for you.” Billy nodded, smiling at Steve. Wonderful, lovely Steve. Steve took a deep breath, rubbing his thumb along Billy’s cheek. “You’re such a dream,” and he crooked his mouth in a grin, and Billy swallowed thickly. He didn’t know what to say. No one had ever called him that before. Instead, he pulled Steve in for a kiss.

It was Saturday morning and Billy was anxious. He’d prepped, he’d cleaned, but he hadn’t stretched, wanting Steve to be the one to do that. Wanted desperately to know what those fingers felt like inside him. Billy shook his head, shifting awkwardly and ignoring his half chub, hoping it would go away. He still had time before going to Steve’s, so he ran to the coffee shop on campus and grabbed himself a breakfast sandwich and black coffee, as well as a dnaish and fancy sweet drink for Steve. The line was longer than he’d have liked, too close to finals for it to be as empty as usual for a Saturday, and he had to run for Steve’s dorm by the time he had paid and gotten the drinks and food.

Steve yanked the door open when Billy arrived, smiling when he held out the coffee and bag of delicious pastry.

“Good, we’ll need the energy.” Billy smirked as Steve turned, heading back into his dorm. Steve had a single, which Billy was always grateful for. They never had to worry about being quick or quiet. Well, quiet for a roommate. Billy was positive Steve’s neighbors hated him. Luckily, he gave absolutely no fucks.

“So,” Billy began, swiping his tongue over his bottom lip. “I did what you said. Everything is clean.” Steve smiled at him, tucking his head down to give Billy a sweet, chaste kiss.

“You’re so cute,” he said. Billy huffed.

“I think the word you’re looking for is sexy. Unbearably hot. An absolute fucking sex god--”

“Oh my god,” Steve laughed. “Fine, fine. You’re the sexiest man alive. And also the cutest.” Billy tried to bite back his smile, but it was hard. Steve shifted nervously from foot to foot before pulling out a tub from under his bed. Billy’s eyes widened when he set it on the bed and opened it up.

He’d never seen so many sex toys in his life.

“Damn,” he breathed, reaching out and grabbing a monster of a dildo, blue and ribbed. Steve blushed a little, scratching the back of his head. Billy sat down on the bed, looking through the box. Steve sat on the other side.

“I’ve been growing this since like, high school. So I have a lot.” He dug around, pulling out what looked like a harness.

“What’s that?”

“So, here.” Steve dug around in the box, grabbing a flesh colored dildo of pretty average size. He connected it to the front of the harness. “This is the strap. Makes it so I can fuck you properly,” he said, smirking a little. Billy swallowed, feeling something churn in his belly. Something warm and good. Steve bit his lip, setting the strap down and crawling forward, pressing Billy onto the bed. Billy let his head hit the pillow, gazing up at Steve as he hovered above him. “If I do anything that hurts or that you don’t like, you tell me, okay?” The genuine concern and care in Steve’s eyes was way more overwhelming than the idea of a dick in his ass. Billy swallowed thickly and nodded.

“Yeah,” he rasped hoarsely. Steve smiled, soft and kind, and swooped down for a kiss. He gently licked into Billy’s mouth, making him sigh contentedly. Billy slowly heated up the kiss, sucking on Steve’s tongue and biting his lip. Steve groaned, grinding his hips down. Billy had been half hard since this morning, and the friction was delightful, making him gasp. Steve took the chance to roll his tongue in Billy’s mouth, moving to kiss down his neck as Steve’s hips rolled, grinding slow and steady against Billy. They moved against each other, breathing each other’s air, until Billy couldn’t take it. The feel of Steve against him, sweat pants damp from how wet he surely was, was too much. He was already close. “Steve, baby, please--” Steve groaned and pulled back, moving from on top of Billy. Billy rolled over, pushing up onto his elbows and knees. “ Please.”

“Holy shit,” Steve breathed as Billy gave a cheeky grin, despite his blush. He moved so he could see Steve, bangs falling in sweaty pieces across his forehead, cheeks and lips flushed. Billy bit his lip. His nerves were settling now as it got closer, overwhelmed by the anticipation and excitement. Steve slowly pulled Billy’s shorts down, inhaling sharply when he realized Billy was going commando. It wasn’t different than usual, but it never failed to get Steve riled up. He cupped Billy’s cheeks, kneading them as if in a trance, pulling them open to stare at Billy’s hole. It made him shiver.

“Come on, Harrington,” he purred. Steve fumbled for the lube, squirting some onto Billy’s crack. He hissed at the cold, though his skin quickly warmed it up. Steve rubbed it around his hole, breath loud, before squirting some on his fingers.

“One first, okay?” Steve said. Billy harrumphed and stuck his ass out. Steve laughed, biting his lip as he teased Billy’s rim. He prodded gently, sweetly, pushing in to the first knuckle, wiggling, and finally pushing in more. Billy’s breath hitched and he closed his eyes. It was different. A feeling he wasn’t used to. But it wasn’t bad. Steve pushed his finger in and out, wiggling it before curling. Billy’s toes curled and he gasped a little, pushing back against Steve’s finger. Now that was fucking nice. Steve gently rubbed for a minute before pulling his finger out. Billy whined. “Oh my god,” Steve chuckled. “You’re so horny for it.” Billy stuck out his tongue, ignoring how hot his face felt.

“Like you’re any better!” Billy propped himself up, putting on his slutty Steve face. “Billy, oh Billy please! Lemme cum, I wanna cum, just touch me!” Billy yelped, letting out a long moan as Steve sunk two fingers into him, giving his ass a slap.

“Dunno that you should be making fun of the guy with his fingers up your ass, babe,” Steve said.  “Dunno that I like it when you get all sassy when I’m just trying to make you feel good.” He slapped Billy’s ass again. Billy grunted and his dick jumped.

“Shit,” he hissed. Steve kissed the small of his back.

“Just wait till I find your prostate, sweets.” His voice was commanding, but sweet. It made Billy wanna listen, wanna follow his rules, wanna-- Wanna worship him.

“Oh?” Billy panted. “This the King Steve I’ve heard so much about?” Steve grinned, scissoring his fingers. Billy pushed back, sighing against the stretch. It felt good. They moved together, Steve alternating between scissoring and just pistoning his fingers in and out.

“God, you’re gonna be so tight, baby,” Steve hummed, kissing along Billy’s spine. “You’re gonna love when I fuck you. I’m gonna start slow until you can’t stand it, show you just how good you make me feel.” Billy shuddered, moaning against the sheets. Steve added more lube, and a third finger. “You’re taking these so good. Shit, Billy. Being so good for your King.” Billy grinned as his dick kicked, and he pushed back against the fingers. After a moment, he curled his fingers just so, making Billy violently twitch. He let out a loud moan, biting the meat of his palm to quiet himself.

“Fuck,” Billy gasped. Steve had paused, and when Billy turned to look, his eyes were wide and his jaw dropped.

“Wow,” Steve breathed. He pulled his fingers out, standing up and shedding his sweats and boxers. Billy could see how wet, how excited he was as he pulled on the strap, moving to get behind Billy. “You think you’re ready?” He slapped Billy’s ass again, getting a low groan, rolling a condom onto the dildo and lubing it up. Steve rubbed the dick along Billy’s crack.

“Fuck me, Steve,” Billy growled. “For fucks sake.” Steve huffed, rolling his eyes.

“You’re so demanding. If I recall correctly, I’m giving you the King Steve treatment, not the Follow Billy’s Rules treatment.” And before Billy could reply, he slipped in, slowly pushing in the head before pausing, giving Billy time to adjust, before slowly pressing in again. Billy’s jaw dropped and he pushed back, drool dripping out of the corner of his mouth.

“Oh my god,” he whined. Steve licked his lips, smirking.

“Yeah? You like my dick that much, Hargrove? You should see the others.” Billy shuddered as Steve bottomed out. Billy swallowed, panting wetly against the sheets.

“Yeah,” Billy moaned, feeling so full and content. “Fuck yeah.” Steve moved his hips out slowly, leaning forward to kiss Billy’s shoulders and down his spine, sucking hickies between his shoulders. Billy was shaking under him, grasping the sheets tightly in his fists.

“Fuck, baby,” Steve groaned. “I wanna see your face. You okay moving positions?” Billy nodded, biting down on a whine when Steve pulled out. Gentle hands guided him onto his back, hair like a sweaty halo around him. Steve looked down, so beautiful and fucking hot. Everything Billy could ever dream of. He pulled Billy up by the back of his knees, maneuvering them over his shoulders and slipping back in slowly, breathing heavy and pointed. Billy gasped, throwing his head back as he reached up and clamped a hand on Steve’s shoulder. Steve grinned down at him, brown hair damp and hanging around his face.

“Liked that, huh?” Steve purred, slowly pulling back out. Billy couldn’t do much but pant, hand clenching at Steve’s pale skin as he felt the dick slide out. His brain was melted goo, struck dumb by the feeling of Steve pressing into him again, keeping his pace aggravatingly slow and steady. “Fuck,” he whispered, kissing along the column of Billy’s neck. Billy closed his eyes, almost overwhelmed. “You look so good, baby, stretched around me like this.” Billy could feel himself blushing, but he knew the feeling of watching your cock sink into your lover, and his dick kicked, wondering if he looked as good as Steve did.

“Shit, Stevie,” Billy groaned as Steve bottomed out again, pausing in his movements. “Fuck, baby…” Steve shifted, moving forward so he could press deeper into Billy. The harness of the strap rubbed against Billy’s skin, creating a wonderful addition of pleasure to the feeling of being so full. Billy breathed deep, biting his bottom lip as Steve pulled out again, still going maddeningly slow. “Come on,” Billy whined, trying to move his hips so he could speed things up. “Fuck me like you mean it! Like King Steve would-- Fuck!” Billy hadn’t even finished his sentence when Steve smirked, smug and cocky, before slamming his hips back in. His pace was almost brutal, their skin slapping together as he pistoned in and out. Billy forgot what words were, mind blanking as Steve shifted and hit his prostate. He got so much deeper at this angle. And Billy could watch him, see him come apart. Billy moaned, low and rumbly, biting his lips to try and keep from making too much noise. The bed itself rattled against the wall of Steve’s dorm, probably pissing off the neighbors, but fuck them. Billy was getting fucked within an inch of his life, they could suck his dick.

Well, not actually. He’d much prefer if Steve did that.

“You’re so beautiful,” Steve murmured, hand running down Billy’s chest before moving back up to tweak his nipples. The other hand stayed on Billy’s hip, gripping tightly. He slowed his pace down, pulling out with care before snapping his hips back in. Each snap of his hips, each slap of skin, each squelch of lube, sent jolts straight to Billy’s dick. It leaked against his stomach and he arched into Steve’s touch, eyes snapping open, though he barely saw anything. “My beautiful guy,” Steve sighed, leaning down to kiss Billy as he buried his dick deep inside, keeping his hips flush to Billy’s ass. It made his back arch and he reached for his dick, jerking himself rapidly. “Yeah,” Steve breathed, kissing Billy’s neck sloppily, tongue leaving a trail along his collar bone. “Cum for me, sweetheart,” he whispered into Billy’s ear. He licked the lobe, giving it a bite. Billy arched, crying out as he came, shooting up his stomach and chest. He gasped loudly, groaning low and long as he stripped his cock, sperm dripping out and onto his stomach, slicing down to pool in between his pecs. Steve pulled out slowly, lowering Billy down before licking at the cooling sperm on his skin. He slurped it up, loud and obnoxious, just like Billy liked. Billy shuddered, licking his lips and pulling Steve up for a kiss. Steve hummed into his mouth before pulling back. He swiftly removed the strap, climbing into bed and pulling Billy against his chest.

“Wow,” Billy said, voice raspy from how loud he’d gotten. He never made that much noise but, well, that was Steve. “That was just-- Wow.” Steve smiled, kissing the back of Billy’s neck.

“You’d wanna do it again?” Steve asked, sounding a little vulnerable.

“Honestly, gimme a few hours, and I’ll be ready.” Steve laughed, loud and bright, before pulling Billy even closer, matching grins on their faces.

[peachyaone]

5 Stages of Grief.

Pairings: Loki Laufeyson x reader.

Warning: Mentions of Loki’s death.

Y/N has the power to "see" through someone's eyes. It would only work if the person they're "seeing" is alive. Otherwise, all they would see is a blurred vision of what the person would see. They also have the power to manipulate energy to transform to any shape and form.

STAGE ONE    STAGE TWO    STAGE THREE   STAGE FIVE

Stage Four: Depression.

Y/N turned on the shower, running it on cold. Somehow the cold comforted them, just like that time when Loki revealed his Jötunn form to them. It's already been five years now. But to Y/N it felt like millions. They had been living in haze, their mind seems to wander elsewhere while their body was moving by itself. Everytime one of the members tried their best to talk to them, they'd fail.

Time passed, and they were still in the shower. It was freezing now. Knocks cut through the sound of the shower running. "Y/N?" It was Natasha. No answer. she knocked again, still no answer. "Hey, you okay in there?" Natasha asked.

"Hey, I'm coming in- Y/N?" Natasha gasped. Y/N was on the ground, leaning against the glass wall. "Y/N...Y/N?!" Natasha shook their shoulder. Y/N's lips were slightly blue. "Shit." Natasha said, reached out to grab Y/N's arm and slung it over her shoulder. 'Hey, Y/N, can you hear me?" She asked. Y/N's eyes fluttered open. "L-Loki?" Y/N whispered, their eyes slowly closing.

“No, don’t sleep!  Do you hear me?  Wake up, Y/N, look at me.” Natasha said to them.

Y/N's POV

It was almost impossible to get your eyes open, every part of you was heavy. You couldn't remember what happened. All you remember was the feeling of him, his hands against your skin.

*Flashback*

"Loki?" You called out. You just got home from the facility, freshened up and went to visit Loki in his cell at Asgard. You requested to talk to him, in private. "Where is he ?" You thought. "Loki?" You called out again. You walked down the hall.

"Hello, darling." Loki said. You let out a noise of suprise. "You scared me, love." Y/N giggled. Loki chuckled.  You look at him with a smile. "How are you holding up?" You asked. Loki gave you a smirk, "I'm doing great, how about you, dear?" He asked you. You knew something was wrong. "You can drop it, Loki." You said to him. Loki froze. "I-I don't know what you're talking about, Y/N" He said, nervously. "The illusion. Drop it." You said. The image of Loki in front of you starts to disappear. What was before you was Loki on the ground. Furniture were strewn around the cell. The ground was stained with what looks like....blood? "Oh god, you're bleeding!" You exclaimed. You tried to use your powers.

Whatever force that was keeping him in, was keeping you out too. Once your hands touches the forcefield, it zaps you with the force that send you back flying. Your back hits the stone wall. Loki tried to get to you but you stopped him. "No, it might do the same to you." You said, groaning. Walking back to the cell, you look at him with a sad look.

He looked ill, there were dark circles and eye bags underneath his eyes. His cheeks are slightly sunken in. Footsteps echoed down the hall, it was Thor. "Don't worry. I'll be back." You said. "Thor!" You shouted. The blonde turned to look at you. "Ah, Lady Y/N. Is there something wrong?" He asked. "Thor is there any way that I could get in Loki's cell? Please I need to help him." You pleaded. "If you're helping him escape then I can't he-" "No! It's not that. He's injured, please, Thor." You said. Thor saw the pleading look in your eye and sighed.

"I swear to my father, Y/N. If you're planning any schemes to let him escape, I'll hunt you down." Thor said to you. "I'm not, I promise." You said. "Fine, but only for an hour. Just let me get the guards, you stand in front his cell." Thor said. You nodded and thanked him. He patted you in the head and walked away. You ran back to Loki's cell. "What did you say to Thor?" Loki said, eyebrow arched. "I pleaded with him to let me in your cell." You said to him. "And?" "He said yes. And I stay in there only for an hour." You said.

Loki looked at you, surprised. "Why would you want to be in here?" He asked. "So I can clean your wound and to hold you." You said shyly."Always so nice to me, sweetheart." He smiled at you.

*Flashback ends*

After closing your eyes, you could see him… you just needed a minute.  Just a few minutes of sleep. You want to see him again.

*3rd person*

“Don’t go to sleep,” Natasha said, forcing Y/N to look at her. “Stay awake, you need to get warm.”  She said. Y/N was unresponsive. They were lying so still but with a small smile on their lips. Natasha placed them on the couch, covering them with blankets. She hurriedly called Steve.

"Hey Nat. What's up?"

"Would you mind picking up a heating pad on your way here today?

"I don't mind, may I ask why?"

"It's Y/N. They stayed in the cold shower for too long, hypothermia."

"On my way."

Natasha looked at Y/N, worried. Things had been going downhill for Y/N ever since the ambush. Thor left, leaving them no one to share their pain with. Natasha knew that none of them could help them. Y/N had been with Loki for so long, suddenly losing him like that surely destroyed them from inside. She sighed. "What am I gonna do to you, Y/N?" she said, sadly.

Y/N'S POV

*Dream*

It was no surprise that Loki was a very attentive partner. Some might even call him possessive. Though, you would say that he leaned more protective than possessive.

He knew you weren’t some weakling by any means, your powers and all. But with your sometimes soft and caring personality, most assume you to be, but he was quite popular man with many people looking for a way to hurt you in an attempt to get at him. You knew that, but it did scared you at all.

It was unusually warm in the little house which you live with Loki. Maybe it was because of the fact that your AC was busted and the mechanic in your town is unavailable. You got out of bed and padded over to your drawer and pulled out a tank top. The warm air embrace your skin as you wiped the sweat away from you face. You sighed and then walked out to the kitchen, Loki was there drinking his tea. "Morning, love" You said, kissed him on his forehead. You head to the fridge, pulled out a cold water bottle. You groaned in relief as the cold water went down your throat. You felt arms wrapping around your waist. "Hey, darling" Loki whispered. You took one of his hands and pressed it against your lips.

You could feel his skin getting a little colder. "Loki?" You said. He hummed in response. "Is the heat getting to my head, or you're getting colder?" You asked. His head was buried against your neck, you felt his hands slid under your top to run soothing circles on your stomach. "Loki?" you said, turning around. His skin was a pale blue, you cupped his cheeks. "Honey, are you okay?" you asked. "Love, I'm half Jötunn remember?" He reminded you. You eyes widened in realization as your cheeks flushed. "Oh." You said. Loki chuckled. You buried your face in his chest. "Did my lovie forget~?" He teased. "S-shut up" Your whined, muffled by his chest. He laughed and kissed you on your forehead. Loki lifted your chin with his finger, making you look at him.

His eyes were pale red and his marks starts to protrude from his skin. He was truly a sight to behold. Loki find the expression on your face adorable, Your lips were slightly parted, eyes filled with wonder and love. You were actually not scared of him. “You know I love you no matter what, right?” You said as you ran your fingers through his surprisingly soft hair in a comforting manner. He leaned into your touch. “I know you do.” His words were muffled into your neck. You felt him place a soft kiss on your neck and start trailing them up towards your face. Your eyes closed and he kissed your lips. You kissed him back, the kiss ended a moment later and before you could fully open your eyes, his presence was gone.

"I'll always love you, my dear." You heard him say.

"Loki, wait!"

He was gone.

*Dream end*

You shot awake, breathing heavily. You look around, hopeful that the last 5 years was a horrible nightmare and that Loki was here. But you saw Natasha and Steve, then the harsh, cold reality crashed unto you.

He's dead.

You felt like you were gonna throw up, you felt numb. You stared at your ring, but it wasn't on your finger. You panicked, you look around you. "Where was it?" You thought. Natasha saw that you were awake, and rushed towards you. "Hey, calm down Y/N." She said. "Where is it? Where's my ring?" You asked her. "Don't worry I have it." She gave you the ring. "Thank you." You whispered. Steve kneeled beside you, he looked very concerned. "Hey, Y/N" He said. "Hi, Steve." You mumbled. "Y/N. This is not healthy." He said. Ouch. It was straight to the point.  “What am I without him, Steve? Nothing.” You said, looking at him. Your eyes was dull, as if the life has been sucked out of them. "You are something. You're family." He said. You laughed bitterly. "Family, really? Look at us, Steve. Look at me." You said. "Where is everyone, Steve? Family are supposed to be together, LOOK AT EVERYONE! They're gone, Steve. Gone." You said, looking at your ring. You laughed again. "How can you handle all this bullshit? We were supposed to prevent this, but we failed." You said.

He went silent.

You fell back to the couch. Tears started to fall, what's the point of living? You lost everything. Your partner, your friends, people that you barely knew. You couldn't live knowing that you've failed the one thing you were meant to do, saving people. You failed him.

Why should you go on at all?

[jamesbbhoney]

The Brightest Light

summary: Your abilities have never struck you as something with value beyond aesthetic, but to Bucky, your light counts in more ways than one. [Bucky x enhanced!reader]

warnings: mentions of drunkenness, implication of PTSD

note: hi! this is not my first fic but it’s the first one I’m ever sharing so woohoo :) enjoy and please feel free to share feedback with me!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

You opened your eyes to a dark room, only a thin stream of light coming in through your window from the crescent moon hung in the sky. With sleep still tugging at your eyes, you became aware of the smell of fresh coffee swirling in the air. You reached around for your phone to no avail.

“FRIDAY, what time is it?” you questioned into the darkness.

“The time is 3:41 a.m. Eastern Time, Ms. Y/l/n.”

You groaned gently, closing your eyes and leaning into your pillow. You knew very well who was up in the dark of the morning making coffee - Bucky. There was no one else on your floor of Stark Tower, and for that matter in the entirety of the Tower, who would be up and drinking coffee at this hour. Knowing that this meant you could steal some extra time alone with Bucky, you slowly propped yourself up, rubbing your eyes as they searched to make sense of the dark. You held your palm open in front of you, emitting a few marble-sized balls of light and releasing them like little fireflies into your room (first golden and warm, before you decided on a cool lavender color instead, watching the light dance and melt from gold into purple). You smiled softly at the way the light moved, perfectly tailored to your control yet almost alive on its own. 

Your ability had never been one you felt was particularly meaningful or valuable. Being able to create and manipulate energy from your fingertips, emitting light in beams, rays, balls, shapes, any form you could imagine, really, was never going to save anyone’s life. You could never shake the feeling that you just didn’t belong with the elite, talented, gifted people you lived and worked with. Yet as part of a wave of Enhanced offered the chance to live and train at Stark Tower two years ago, you had somehow managed to land yourself in the circles of people like Steve Rogers and Tony Stark. Moreover, if often put you in the kitchen at 3 a.m. stealing moments among the quiet with Bucky Barnes. 

That was largely the nature of your relationship with Bucky: stolen moments in the early morning or the dead of night, where the bustle of life seemed to still. When distraction waned and a certain super soldier found himself (more nights than not) unable to sleep. You couldn’t help but find yourself drawn to him whenever you were alerted to his presence, whether it was the smell of coffee in the darkness of the morning, or the fact that everyone else would go to bed and he would still be up, looking out the windows in quiet contemplation, eager to stay awake as long as he could muster.

- - - 

One year earlier - July 4, 2:15 a.m.

“I’m fine, really, Y/n. It was just a tough night. You should go to bed.”

Decently drunk from the 4th of July celebrations and more defiant than ever, you crossed your arms and pouted. “What, you don’t want me around?” you said, giving him your biggest puppy dog eyes, knowing damn well that wasn’t what he meant.

He chuckled, looking up from where he stood at the edge of the balcony, looking out over the railing at the skyline to meet those eyes of yours. “Trust me, doll, that’s not the case.”

You inched closer to him as the cold of the night hit you. “Was it the fireworks?” you asked, studying his eyes as they held yours.

He looked down at his hands gripping the railing. He nodded solemnly. “Yeah… I should have known I wouldn’t be able to handle it all - the party, the blaring music, the fireworks…” he trailed off. He looked back up at you, forcing a smile. “But really, I’m fine, you don’t have to stay up with me.” 

You rolled your eyes. A year you’d known him at that point, countless missions together, many late-night talks and hot chocolates, and you’d never let him stay up alone thus far, not when his eyes begged you to stay as he weakly encouraged you to go to bed. Why he thought his arguing would make any difference this time was a mystery. 

“I know I don’t have to, Bucky. I want to,” you said, closing the space between you, unable to resist the way his presence pulled you in.

Still woozy from all the drinks and commotion of the night, you reached out to his forearm to steady yourself, instantly floored at how strong and stable he felt. He looked down at where your hand met his arm, looking slightly confused. He looked up at you again, his eyes sparkling.

You smiled back, relaxing at how grounded you felt, one hand on the railing of the balcony, one on your best friend who you had had a hopeless crush on since the moment you met him a year prior. 

“I used to love fireworks, actually,” he said, almost breathlessly as he turned slightly to be facing you. “Just, the noise…” he trailed off again in a whisper. 

You inched closer to him, drawn to his warmth as the night grew colder. You removed your right hand from the railing, holding it gingerly between you and Bucky. You willed a ball of soft red light into your hand, and gently pushed it upwards until it floated between you and Bucky. You concentrated as hard as you could, which was difficult given the drunken state you were in, trying to imagine the ball splitting into little stars and sparks. As you focused, the light followed your vision, creating a beautiful dance of twirling light and mock-fireworks in the space between you and Bucky. You smiled at yourself, enjoying the display you brought to life without the bangs and pops of real fireworks. 

You looked up to see Bucky staring in awe at you through the light as it encircled you both. You met his eyes and the light transformed into a myriad of colors, brighter and warmer than you had any conscious intention of. Although you had lost focus on your control of the light completely, it seemed to mirror the butterflies in your stomach as Bucky looked at you with such wonder on his face. 

The tension between you was palpable. The space between you was inching closed as his left hand found your waist, cool metal against the gap of skin between your jeans and white top. Your right hand found his back and it felt like eons passed as you simply stared at each other surrounded by your homemade fireworks. 

He crashed his lips against yours, passionate but sweet. He tasted like bourbon and you breathed him in, desperate for this moment to last forever. You kissed him back with such intention, letting every moment of pining over the past year escape through your lips. Your heart swelled in your chest as you both pressed against each other, his soft touches turning into desperate arms pulling you against him. 

He eventually pulled away, the pair of you completely breathless, and the lights surrounding you twirling and exploding with vigor. As your breathing evened out, the lights calmed down to the softest golden glow, swimming slowly across the entire balcony.

“Y/n, I can’t begin to tell you how long I’ve been wanting to do that,” he said softly into you.

“Me, too,” you laughed. Although you had been jolted by your kiss, you still swayed from the drinks in your system. Bucky clung onto you as his eyebrows knit together slightly.

“But you really should go to bed,” he said lightly with a chuckle as you leaned into him for support. “Come on, doll, I’ll walk you to your room.”

From that night on, you stole more moments when no one could see; when sleep graced everyone but Bucky, you graced him with your light.

- - -

You pulled on a white hoodie and your fluffy slippers, trudging into the hallway of the floor you shared with Bucky and a shapeshifter named Cal, brought in around the same time as you were. The lavender light followed you out and you held your palm out again, willing the light to come into your palm as a mini lantern to guide you down the hall. You stared into the orb, wispy and pulsing, before stepping into the open space of the kitchen, letting your hand fall and the light dissipate.

“Morning, sunshine,” you said softly. Bucky, leaning over the counter clutching his mug of black coffee, lifted his head to meet your eyes. He smiled sweetly at you, although his eyes were tired and swollen from a lack of sleep.

“Hey there,” he said, his body clearly relaxing as you made your way towards him.

You passed behind him to get your own mug, letting your hand brush along his back as you did. 

You put the kettle on for tea, picking out an earl grey bag for your mug, and came up next to him, allowing your shoulders to touch comfortably. You looked up at him in wonderment, barely able to make out his features but even in the dim light of only a crescent moon streaming in through the big windows looking out over the skyline and balcony, you could see the light in his eyes, the jagged lines that carved out his face. He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you steadily into him. You reached your arms up around his tense neck, gently massaging into his hair as he leaned into your touch.

“Nightmares, again?” you asked, watching him carefully.

He shut his eyes with a sigh and nodded as you continued rubbing circles at the nape of his neck.

“Mhm. Worse than usual,” he mumbled into the space between you.

“I’m sorry, baby” you whispered. “I wish you’d let me stay in there with you.”

Bucky refused to let you sleep in his room after he accidentally gave you a black eye from struggling in his sleep a couple months prior. Not wanting to reveal the full nature of your relationship to the team, you told them it was from sparring, and Bucky could hardly look at you for weeks given his guilty feelings.

“You know that’s not a good idea,” he said, his voice heavy, eyes still shut as he gripped at your sweatshirt.

You didn’t have it in you to argue with him; not tonight, at least. 

The tea kettle started to boil and you slid gently out of his embrace to get your tea ready. He leaned back towards the counter. 

With warm tea in one hand, you slid the other into Bucky’s right hand, pulling him with you towards the big windows in the living room, sitting on the floor in the corner, your usual spot. Bucky leaned against the wall, spreading his sweatpant-adorned legs open to make space for you to sit against him.

You nestled back against him, head resting in the crook of his neck as he set his coffee down and big arms wrapped around you from behind. 

“How’s the training going?” he asked after a while of just sitting together looking at the moon through the window.

You sighed. You had been working with Wanda to try and channel your abilities into something with a bit more power. With all the field training and martial arts they had taught you, you were as good as any other specialized SHIELD agent, but as part of a crew of Enhanced individuals, you felt vastly inferior. All you could do was play with light, albeit often beautiful and mesmerizing, and you were really beginning to question your place there.

“Not great,” you said dejectedly. “I’m really trying, but it’s just not destructive, there’s something missing. It doesn’t work that way no matter how hard I try. Other than aesthetics, I’m as useless as ever.”

“Doll, you aren’t useless by any means,” he said, gripping you tighter. “You are incredibly gifted, and if there’s something else that’s meant to come from your gift, you’ll find it eventually. If not,” he shrugged slightly. “You’re still pretty damn amazing.”

You smiled, setting your tea down next to Bucky’s coffee and turning to face him. He inched away from the wall so that you could straddle him, and he held your back so easily, propping you up to stay face to face.

“I love you,” you said, wrapping your arms around his neck again, noses brushing.

“I love you, too, doll,” he returned. 

You sat together for a while, drinking your tea and coffee, trading gossip from the team, venturing onto the balcony, gazing at the moon. You showed Bucky a new party trick you’d been working on, where you conjured light that took on the shape of a dancing couple, laughing and spinning together. You didn’t say it, but Bucky didn’t need to hear it to know it was the two of you you were thinking of.

Lying in comfortable silence on the balcony under a shared blanket, Bucky pulled you into him.

“It hurts, Y/n/n,” he said so quietly you barely heard him say it. “I hardly sleep because the pain in my dreams is so… real. It hurts, baby. I’m afraid to sleep.”

Your heart nearly broke in two. You rolled over so you were fully on top of him, elbows framing his head as your hands carded through his hair, the blanket cascading down, locking you into a safe little cove on the aid open balcony.

“I know, honey,” you said soothingly, leaning your forehead against his. “I wish I could do something to take your pain away.” A halo of white light began to form around your hands. 

Bucky glanced up at your hands, his eyebrows knitting together. He looked to your face to see you as confused as he was. 

You couldn’t explain it, but your hands felt like magnets drawn to Bucky’s head, fingers pressing ever so gently against his temples. As you did, you could physically feel the tension melt away, it was a sensation you’d never felt before - beyond feeling his muscles relax under your touch, this was feeling… his mind relax.

He exhaled deeply at your touch, eyes closing gently as he put his hands over yours so slowly and gently. You realized it wasn’t just your touch, it was your light, your power, that affected him this way. You had been right that your ability wasn’t destructive, but it wasn’t just passive entertainment. People had always been mesmerized by it in a way, in taking it in with their eyes, but you had never thought to try to use it to heal, to sooth strain. Now, you could feel the soft glow emitting from your palms draw out the strain, draw out the mental pain the man you loved shouldered every day and night.

“Baby,” he said, clinging to your fingers against his temples. “What are you doing?” he asked curiously, softly.

You let out a shy, breathy laugh. “I don’t really know. It just happened. I- I didn’t know I could do this.”

He opened his eyes to look up at you with the most adoration you’d ever been on the receiving end of. The connection between you only intensified with this newfound discovery. You could truly feel him, feel the tension he held, or rather didn’t feel at that point. 

The glow slowly faded from your hands as Bucky gently pried your fingers off of his temples.

“Amazing,” he said between kisses pressed to your knuckles. “You’re just… amazing, Y/n.” He brought his hands to the small of your back, pulling you into him as you continued straddling him. “There’s nothing you can’t do.” 

You leaned into him, pressing your lips to his, pulling back so slightly, not wanting to leave any more space than absolutely necessary between you. “It’s for you, baby. It’s all for you,” you breathed into him. “You bring out the best in me, the brightest of my light.” You kissed him again. “It’s yours, all for you.”

- - - - - - 

there ya have it! my first published fic on here. loosely inspired by Video Games by Lana Del Rey (mostly just the last part of dialogue heh) feel free to leave feedback for me in my inbox or wherever! hope you enjoyed :)

[thetiredbiwrites]

Okay so, I know you did a sick!readerxSteve Rogers but I was wondering if you can do the same thing but with Bucky? If not that concept just something cute with Bucky?

Thank you for requesting, hope this is ok 😊

Bucky x sick!Reader, platonic!Tony x sick!Reader

A/N: I know I said I’d post something yesterday, but my laptop is a bitch and didn’t co-operate. I nearly punched a wall.

Your hands froze on the tech you were upgrading as you took a deep breath, letting it out slowly while rapidly blinking the dizziness away so your eyes could re-focus.

Tony had been subtly watching you all morning, concern growing as time ticked on. Of course, he had noticed his favourite teammate (don’t tell Rhodey) wasn’t at her best when she first set foot in the lab a few hours ago.

His initial instinct was to ask if you should be down here and not in bed, but he’s learnt from experience that that didn’t work. He can count the times he won over you on one hand. Instead he opted to keep an eye on you, make sure you didn’t hurt your self or pass out or something.

Additionally, the more he watched you, the more evidence he had to use against you when you try telling him you’re fine.

As he heard you mutter ‘dammit’ for the fiftieth time, he decided it was time to speak up.

Even Tony makes mistakes when working on something, but you had been making silly mistakes and taking twice as long to complete things, which is highly unlike you. You were nearly as smart as Tony in this area (much smarter in many other areas so you were ok with giving this one to Tony).

“Y/N, are you ok?”

The concern was clear in his voice, making you realise you hadn’t been as subtle as you thought. You opted to keep your eyes on your work, determined to finish it and fully aware that if Tony saw your face, you were going to lose this.

“Yeah, I’m good, Tones.”

You had tried to sound normal, but your voice failed you making you cringe at how weak and raspy it sounded. Not needing to look at Tony to know he didn’t believe you.

“You wanna try that again?”

“I’m-I’m just-“ You sighed, leaning back in your chair. “I didn’t sleep well, ok? And with-with Bucky on this mission and- I-I-I’m just tired. That’s all.”

You ran a hand down your face and looked over at Tony who was clearly still concerned and didn’t entirely believe you. With a sympathetic smile and furrowed eyebrows, Tony looked over your face. You looked more than ‘just tired’ to him.

“Maybe I’ll just take a break, go get a coffee.”

You didn’t want to worry Tony more and believed that if you kept convincing yourself you were just tired then that’s all you’d be, right?

“Good idea. Take as long as you need.”

You felt suddenly light-headed as you stood and briefly rested against the desk, just stood up too quickly, that’s all.

The second you stepped out of the lab, Tony asked FRIDAY to watch you. He didn’t need you fainting in some corridor or on some stairs and hurting yourself. The others were due back from the mission today and he really hoped they’d be home soon.

After an hour passed and you hadn’t returned to the lab, Tony became worried and decided to check on you. You were incredibly stubborn and so Tony expected you to immediately come back to the lab, claiming the coffee worked even if you were dead on your feet.

Entering the kitchen, he spotted you at the table, head and arms resting on the table, one hand still holding your mug of now cold coffee.

As you had finished making your coffee, heat spread through your body and a wave of nausea hit. Deciding to sit down, you rested your head on the cool wood, figuring it would pass in a couple minutes. Instead you opened your eyes to see Tony crouching next to your chair.

“Go to bed.”

You stumbled over your words as you sat back, not ready to admit defeat.

“Don’t even try. You’re not well, Y/N, and don’t try to convince me otherwise, it won’t work. Go to bed.” He cut you off, his voice firm but face soft, his paternal side shining through.

He handed you a bottle of water from the fridge and send you off towards your room.

Your feet dragged on the carpet, using the wall for support to help you reach your room. You’ve gone 70 hours in the lab and didn’t feel this weak and tired.

You hated it.

Just as your door came into view, your stomach flipped, and a burst of adrenaline allowed you to get to your bathroom just intime to throw up the contents of your stomach.

The cold wall was a blessing as you rested against it, still sat on the bathroom floor. That’s where you stayed for what felt like hours, focussing on your breathing and willing your body to move.

After using whatever energy was left flowing through you on brushing your teeth and drinking most of the water Tony had given you, you collapsed onto the bed. It had never felt more comfortable than it did right then. Like landing on clouds.

Reaching out just enough to wrap your arms around Bucky’s pillow, you fell asleep.

Bucky pov

The team trudged into the kitchen, glad to finally be home and eat some decent food.

Bucky stretched, his back popping from the long, uncomfortable journey home in the jet. You’d think with all that money, Tony could make decent seats. Sam handed him a mug of coffee and a sigh passed his lips, I guess the expensive coffee machine makes up for the seats.

“I see everyone’s still alive and in one piece. Fantastic.”

A series of grunts and groans followed Tony’s comment. A ‘good to see you too, Tony’ from Steve and an eyeroll from Natasha.

“Barnes, need to talk you.”

“I just got back; can I at least finish my coff- “

“It’s about Y/N.”

Those three words were enough to make Bucky’s heart race as he snapped to attention. Everyone else also looking over at Tony as they simultaneously realised she wasn’t there. The less annoying mechanic would usually meet Bucky the team at landing or in the kitchen.

“What about her?”

“Where is she?”

Bucky ignored Clint and Sam as he rounded the counter and approached the shorter man.

“Is she ok?”

“Sent her to bed a few hours ago. Claimed she was just tired, but she didn’t look well. Probably just sick but too stubborn to admit it. Thought you should know, check on her.”

Bucky nodded, patting Tony’s shoulder in thanks as he passed.

He found his favourite person curled up on top of the covers, arms wrapped around his pillow. Her skin was paler than normal, eyes puffy and shivering slightly, goose-bumps covering her bare arms.

His heart broke and eyebrows furrowed as he looked at her. As quick as he could, he was out of his suit and in sweats and a tee before perching on the edge of the bed. His brows pulled together again, and he let out a sigh as he gently pressed his right hand against your forehead and felt the heat radiating, despite your shivering.

His hand moved to rest on the side of your face as your eyes fluttered open. You tried to smile, glad to have your boyfriend home and safe. He didn’t appear to have any injuries, but you were aware of the worry swimming in his eyes and half smile on his face.

“You’re home.”

“And you’re sick.”

Struggling into a sitting position, you still attempted to deny it, despite throwing up just a few hours prior.

“No. No, I’m not. I’m fine. I- “

You cut yourself off, hand covering your mouth and groaning as the urge to throw up returned.

Bucky’s head tilted as he looked at you, eyebrow raised and a small smile daring you to say ‘fine’ again.

“I’m never babysitting again.”

Bucky chuckled, no believing that for a second. You loved little Morgan like your niece and cried when she first called you ‘Aunt’. You couldn’t stay away from her, even if she did share her germs.

After helping you into comfortable clothes and back to bed, under the covers this time, he put a DVD on the tv and left the room.

Less than 10 minutes later he returned with a steaming mug and a plate of toast.

A smile graced his lips at your grabby hands and passed you the large mug. It was one of your favourites, a Christmas gift from Peter. Adorned with a little black cat holding a knife with the words, ‘I am small and sensitive, but also fight me’. You loved it.

Wrapping both hands around the mug, you brought it up to your face. The aroma of ginger tea already made you feel better and more relaxed.

But when Bucky sat next to you and presented you with the plate of toast, your nose wrinkled in disgust. The thought of eating anything didn’t sound appealing right now.

“Come on, Y/N. You have to eat something; you’ll only feel worse if you don’t.”

You knew he was right, and his face told you he wouldn’t be backing down. He might even resort to force feeding you if he had to.

The tea had been drunk and toast eaten, and now you were wrapped in strong arms, the metal of the left one feeling good against your warm skin.

Bucky leaned down to kiss you, but you flinched back.

“Don’t kiss me.”

“Doll, I can’t get sick.”

“Well… what if I throw up on your face?”

He smiled and kissed your head before pulling you into his chest as the two of you settled to finish watching the movie.

Not that you did, his fingers lightly running up and down your arm soon sent you to sleep.

[yuulina-vre]

Gifting you a new life

Not as planned

Pairing: Steve x Bucky, Reader insert

Warnings: slight angst

Word count: 4589 words

Part: nine

Summary: Y/N won't let her own misery be the reason Steve misses his date with Bucky.

Masterlist

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Y/N runs around wildly, head full of stuff that needs to be done, things that need to get sorted, and a million other things. Though it's hectic right now, Y/N has to admit that work has actually made fun the past week. The kids have written all their assignments, now glad to be finished for the year. They drop jokes and the playful banter gives Y/N some sort of content she hasn’t had in a while. That she didn’t get another letter helps, too. Tony had made sure that not a single one caught her sight and she was grateful for it. There’s still some strain left in her. Each morning she’s afraid to find him near or even in front of her school, to see him on her way home or in the grocery store. Some days she even worries that he found her home and would come. Steve had noticed that and does everything he can to get her calm and distract her. Y/N still tries not to show her anxiety too much and spends more energy in getting him to meet up with bucky. They have seen each other just once after the incident last Wednesday. She’s grateful that there’s a week of school left, after Friday she can force him on as many dates as he needs until he finally admits that he’s head over heels for the brunette soldier.

Now she stops for a second, watching Steve how he nervously runs his hand through his hair, looking through the window every few seconds. She can’t exactly figure out why he’s so nervous. He got KISSED from Bucky! And of course, Y/N knows but only because she snacked Steve’s phone while he was showering two days ago and rang Bucky to squeeze every detail of their date out of him that Steve wouldn’t budge to tell. “Steve! Get dressed, he’ll be here in no time!” The blonde man flinches a little, then turns back to her with a pout. He looks down on himself and back up at her. “I don’t understand why this isn’t nice.” He gestures with his hands down on himself. Y/N can only shake her head. He’s going to meet up with the love of his life and can’t even care to look nice. “Steve.” She pinches the bridge of her nose before she looks back up at him. “Your shirt has paint all over it, your jeans scream work clothes, and you smell. Not the good kind I might add. Hurry the fuck up and go shower. I have put some nice clothes on your bed.” She closes the door behind Steve and smiles softly. Somehow, she feels just as excited. Like she would go on a date herself. While gazing at his bed and the clothes she had put out for him, she mumbles about going shopping with him to actually get some new clothes. Then she leaves his room to get the last things sorted for tomorrow. It’s not like she has some plan for the kids. She probably ends up eating breakfast with them and watching movies… like each year. But still, if someone asks, she has done some slight planning.

The doorbell rings and she hears a curse from Steve’s room. “Shit. No fucking- Ow!”

“Steve!” She walks out of her room, shaking her head as she passes Steve’s door. “Relax, Stevie. He’s early. Take your time and make sure you look nice. I’ll distract him and make sure he knows every painful embarrassing thing about you.” She runs down the stairs Still laughing at the strings of course that followed her threat. She slows down to a walk as she reaches the entrance door and opens it to reveal Bucky. And he looks nice, like, really nice. His hair is wrapped into a bun, he wears a red shirt with a black leather jacket and black jeans, his beard is neatly trimmed. He looks happy. And he wears his prosthetic but it doesn’t seem to bother him today. She whistles appreciatively looking him up and down. “Man, you cleaned up nicely Buck. Wow.” The man blushes a little but smiles. “Thank you.” He looks back behind himself before he clears his throat. “I’m a bit early, sorry.”

“Meh.” She waves him off with a smile, gesturing for him to step inside. “Gives me more time to tell you embarrassing things about or blonde gorgeous myth upstairs.” She hears him chuckle behind her as she leads him into the Livingroom. “Take a seat. You want something to drink?”

“Oh, ehh… water is fine. Thank you.” He flashes a smile at her and Y/N nods. “Water coming right up.” She walks to the kitchen, filling a glass with water, and goes back to pass it to Bucky. “Thanks.” He smiles again, takes a sip before setting the glass down. “I saw he hung up the picture.” Y/N turns to the wall of pictures, humming.”

“Yes, he did.” She smiles at the memory. Steve came rushing in the next morning practically jumping on her bed like a little kid, bouncing up and down and showing the picture in her face. She wasn’t ever really awake at the time, hasn’t even opened his eyes. But he didn’t care. He started rambling for hours on end. It had been a long while that she has seen him talking that happy about his father. Y/N turns back to bucky with a warm smile. “You know, he was very glad he had the picture, rambled for hours about him and how wonderful you are for bringing it back to him.” She sighs slightly, looking at the photo and back at Bucky. “It was the last day he saw him. Shortly before his dad had to leave Steve fell ill and was brought to the hospital. He got that sick that he had to get help breathing. He hadn’t had a chance to say goodbye. And though he knows he’s not at fault for what happened, he regrets that since then. Somehow blaming himself. He told me once that he believed, if he hadn’t fallen ill, if he would have said goodbye, giving him the hugs and kisses he always gave him when he was sent overseas, then he would be still alive. It’s what kids do. Blaming themselves. It took me years to get the idea out of his head but I know that he’s still thinking it now and then.” Y/N leans back against the couch. “He doesn’t want to hear that anymore, though. I think that, when you gave him the photo, you gave him… I think it felt like he could say goodbye now.” Bucky stares at her and nods slowly. Y/N suspects that Steve hadn’t told him about that. And she can see that Bucky knows the weight of what she told him. Of what Steve takes as a burden. “So, thank you, bucky. For saving him.” She smiles at him again, this time placing her hand on his arm and squeezing it lightly. All buck does is nod and swallow. They are silent for a moment, listening to the birds outside and the water in the shower to shut off. They can hear Steve’s footsteps as he hastily runs around his room to get dressed. Some loud bangs let Y/N confirm that he got himself hurt more than once. Probably stumbling around with his pants half on and trying to get his massive dumb head through his shirt. “Ah… Y/N, can Steve… I mean… Can he drive a motorcycle?”

“I think so, he had one back in the days.”

“Thank god.” Bucky lets out a sigh of relief, followed by a nervous giggle and Y/N watches him curiously. She leans a little to the side and looks behind him, out of the window. There’s a motorcycle. Not any but a Harley-Davidson. She smiles at Bucky. “I think he gladly drives with you, Bucky.” The man smiles back at her before his face goes slack. Y/N frowns for a second before she turns around. There is Steve, dressed in the clothes Y/N had laid out and hair neatly styled. Y/N winks at Steve and steps away, leaving the two men to greet each other. She steps into the kitchen as her phone rings on the counter. She smiles, still looking at the boys that are hugging now, and takes the call without looking at the screen. “Hello?”

“It’s nice to finally hear your voice again.” Y/N feels how all color drains from her face and her smile vanishes her body runs cold instantly and her hands start to get sweaty. She knows the voice and she hoped she would never hear it again. “How did you get this number?” Her voice is shaky, maybe even a little too loud. Quickly, she looks back at Steve and Bucky, but they seem not to notice her. Stepping out of the kitchen she passes them to walk into the hall, closing the door behind her. “I have my ways. You didn’t forget that, did you?” Rumlow laughs and a shudder runs over Y/N’s back. Pictures and flashes of old times show up in her head. Times she tried so hard to forget. “What do you want?” her voice sound sold and deep, unfamiliar and scary to herself. Rumlow was always good at making her scared of herself. “I want to see you.”

“No!” Her answer comes fast and straight, without any hesitation but still a little shaky. “Aw, Y/N. are you still mad after all this time?”

“Go to hell! Let me be. Don’t call again.” She hangs up and stares at the black screen. She feels shaky all over, takes a few deep breathes, and tries to calm herself down. She hadn’t thought she would hear his voice ever again, and she hadn’t thought it would affect her that much. She was doing so well. She walks back into the living room after feeling calm enough, forcing a smile on her face as Steve turns around. If he notices that her smile isn’t honest then he doesn’t say anything about it. “Are you two ready?”

“Yeah. Y/N, I’m going to ride a motorcycle again.” Y/N can see his excitement. It has been years after all and he loved driving his old motorcycle until it got victim of an accident, luckily without Steve on it. “I know.” Her smile widens just as her phone rings again. She briefly looks down but turns the call down. She has just enough time to look up as it rings again. She doesn’t take it. Steve frowns a little. Y/N gets rarely any call. The ones she gets are usually from him, Tony, Pepper, or her friend Sharon. Though, it’s not unusual at all that she turns down calls. Sometimes he has to call her four times until she will pick up. Y/N always claims that she does it so he doesn’t get used to her jumping every time he says to hop. The truth is she hates talking on the phone.

“What are you two going to do?” She tries to change the focus away from her phone, which starts ringing again.

“I thought about the aquarium, dinner, and then maybe a movie?” Bucky looks at Steve with an unsure expression but the blonde smiles and nods. “Sounds great.”

“Do you have your briefcase, Stevie?”

“Ah, damn it. I’ll be right back.” Steve turns and quickly runs up the stairs. Y/N laughs and looks at Bucky. “He was really nervous all day.”

“I can relate to that, me too.” Y/N rolls her eyes. “You two do really fit.” Her phone rings again. She closes her eyes and lets out a defeated sigh as Steve comes back down. “Excuse me for a sec.” She really doesn’t want to take the call. She doesn’t want to talk to him now or never again. She wants him gone. To leave her finally alone after all these years. But she knows he won’t stop until he gets what he wants. “What do you want!” She whispers aggressively, sounding braver than she feels. “Oh Y/N, look at you. You sound so brave, wholly different than back then.”

“I dare you. Leave me alone.”

“Y/N, come on. I know you miss me. Listen-”

“No! You listen. I told you I don’t want to hear from you! Leave me alone, asshole!” She shouts and disconnects the call. A rush of anger overcomes her and before she really can compensate what she’s doing she throws her phone on the ground with full force. After staring at it for a second, she instantly regrets it. The screen is wrecked. Little glass shards have flown out of the display and lie on the ground now. She takes some deep breathes and closes her eyes, trying to get her trembling under control. “Y/N?” She hears Bucky’s worried voice, takes a last shaky breath, and turns around to look at Steve and Bucky, who stand in the doorway, both with shocked faces. Her eyes stop at Steve’s and suddenly she bursts into tears. “Shit.” Steve curses and instantly rushes forward to embrace her quickly into a comforting hug, probably guessing what just happened. “H-he…”

“I know. I know.” Steve rubs his hands over her back as she fists hers into his shirt. She feels helpless. What is she going to do? How can she get rid of him? Why can’t he just leave her be? “I-I was d-doing so w-well.”

“I know, it’s okay. You’ll be okay.” Steve rocks a little with her, running his hand through her hair. Bucky still stands in the entrance, looking really uncomfortable. He takes one step to get closer but stops again, staying quiet. Y/N calms painfully slowly. She feels tired and exhausted. Feelings having drained her and thought running wild in her head. Steve’s hand waving through her hair helps, though. It takes her a few minutes until she can muster up the energy to lean out of Steve’s embrace. She rubs her eyes and looks at Bucky, his face twisted in something like concern and uneasiness. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to hold you guys back.”

“Y/N, don’t apologize because of that asshole.” Steve still rubs her back a little. “I don’t know how he got your number, but I swear, as soon as I find out where he is, I’ll make him pay for making you feel miserable again.” She‘s already shaking her head, mouth open to reply something as Bucky speaks up. “M-Maybe we should reschedule, Steve. I should probably go.”

“N-no. It’s okay Bucky.” She gifts him a watery smile, wiping the last of her tears away. “I’m good now.”

“Don’t leave, Buck. We could watch a movie here, order some takeout.”

“No, Steve. You were both looking forward to today. You should still go out.”

“I’m not leaving you alone right now.” Steve turns to her but Y/N shakes her head. “And I won’t let you stay here and ruin a perfect date with Bucky.” They both glare at each other until Steve sighs unsure. He looks over at Bucky before he reluctantly steps back. “You’re calling me the instant he bugs you again.”

“He won’t. My phone broke.” Y/N looks down at what’s left of her phone. “Still. Y/N, I mean it. The instant something’s off!”

“Yes, Steve. I promise.” She looks him straight into the eyes and for a second, they only stare at each other. She can see in Steve’s eyes that she looks confident and sure in her decision because his shoulders drop and he sighs. He slings an arm around her shoulders, kissing her forehead. “Okay. We’ll be back by ten.”

“Have fun.” She smiles and kisses his cheek, walking both men to the door. They still look unsure of the situation but neither of them argues with her. She waves after them until they vanish behind a corner. Just as she closes the door she slides down to the ground. New tears spill from her eyes. She doesn’t feel confident at all. And she’s scared. Scared for her life.

* * *

“Steve! Steve look!” Bucky pats Steve’s arm excitedly and Steve feels like he’s running around with a child. A child that he really likes. “What?” He smiles at Bucky’s wide grin. “They’re feeding the dolphins! Come on.” Bucky grabs Steve’s hand and Steve feels a blush creep upon him as he’s pulled around the halls, past actual kids and their parents. They walk outside and reach the dolphins all too soon. To Steve’s surprise, Bucky doesn’t let go of his hand. He just keeps holding it while he waves them through the people to find a good spot to watch the feeding. Steve doesn’t look at the big tank with the animals already swimming around. Instead, he looks down at their intervened hands. A warms tingle runs through his whole body, settling in his stomach with a feeling of war content. Just at this moment, in this tiny flick of a few seconds, he feels happy genially happy, like he hasn’t felt in years. All because a man that he likes does like him back. In a bold moment, Steve squeezes Bucky’s hand lightly Grinning dumbly at the brunette as he turns around to look at him, matching grin on his face. Though Steve can’t tell for sure if it's because he's excited for the dolphins or just realized how much he has fallen already. Four more feet in front are two free seats and Bucky nearly sprints to them, flopping down, only to fidget around on it. “You love dolphins, huh?”

“No, but their sounds are funny.” Bucky still beams and Steve laughs. “Right.”

“they are! Did you ever just listen to the sound without looking at them?”

“No, I think I never did.”

“You should. My nephew and I have laughed for hours.” Bucky’s grin only widens. The happiness and amusement are written clearly on his face. Once again Steve is reminded how much the man means to him already. Then a thought crosses his mind. Should he be worried? He has fallen fast and hard. He really likes Bucky and he only knows him for about two weeks! It’s going pretty fast and if… If Bucky doesn’t like him as he does, it would… it would hurt. A lot. “Hey. What’s with this face?” The brunette's face pops up in Steve’s view, concern written all over his features. The man squeezes his hand lightly, placing his prosthetic on his thigh. “Steve? Everything alright? We don’t need to watch the feeding if you don’t like it. We could just go-”

“No! No, I’m good just… just was thinking…” He tries a sincere smile and hopes that it doesn’t come off as creepy. Bucky seems to consider it before he slowly nods. “okay. Then… stop thinking. If it makes you look like that. I don’t like that look on your face.”

“Alright.” His hand gets squeezed again.

They watch as a woman steps out to the big tank and talks through a microphone, explaining some things about the animals, stating facts, and starting a small show. Bucky shuffles happily in his seat, jumping in excitement and laughing at any sound. He oohhhh’s and ahhhh’s like the kids do and Steve feels himself painfully reminded how childlike the man is.

After the feeding Steve lets Bucky pull him through the whole building, still acting more as a child than an adult but Steve likes it. He thinks Bucky is cute like this and he never met a man that can be this excited about some fishes AND show it. He hasn’t forgotten about Y/N, though. Now and then his thoughts run back to her and worry creeps up in his mind. He gets fidgety but a look of curiosity from Bucky in his direction helps him to concentrate back on him. He doesn’t want to ruin anything.

They’re through the aquarium all too soon, having seen everything there is, and eaten a small lunch. Bucky drives them then to a nearby restaurant. They get a table in a quiet corner, able to oversee the whole room. Steve pulls out his phone and places it on the table after checking the display. There are still no calls or texts from Y/N and somehow, the lack of any of it makes him more nervous than before. The blonde knows that Bucky notices him staring at his phone. He rubs a hand over his face, feeling like he’s already ruining their day with his worry so he sighs. “I’m just calling her real quick.” He looks apologetic at Bucky and takes the phone to dial the number. It rings and rings and rings. He can see Bucky frowning and feels like copying it. The mailbox turns on and Steve hangs up, immediately calling once more. It rings again until the mailbox answers. “Hey Y/N. It’s me. I just want to check up on you. Are you there? Could you pick up?” He waits for a little until the mailbox shuts down. He frowns at his phone and looks at Bucky. “Something’s not right.”

“Why?” Bucky looks a little worried too, seemingly half up and out of his chair. “She’s not picking up. She always picks up the house phone.”

“Maybe she went out, too? With some friends?”

“Maybe but… No. She wanted to grade the exams the kids wrote. She won’t go out.”

“She could have changed her mind.” Bucky settles back down, shrugs again and places his hand on Steve’s. “She’ll be okay.” Steve sighs again, still frowning at Bucky but then he nods and slips his phone into his jacket, leaving the volume on high to make sure he really hears it when it goes off.

They still decide to quit the movie. Steve’s worry increases after Y/N doesn’t pick up the third time, he called either and Bucky seems to get a little worried, too. So, he drives them home and walks in behind Steve. “Y/N?”

“Stevie!” Y/N shouts and comes running up to him. She almost stumbles but catches herself on Steve’s shoulder with some sort of strange giggling. “Were you drinking?” Steve raises his eyebrows confused and shoves Y/N into the living room. Bucky is already ahead of them. “Jus’ a teeny-tiny bit.” She tries to show it with her fingers but they’re touching and Steve knows that he had more to drink than nothing. Her giggling is just one indication. “A teeny-tiny bit, huh.” Bucky laughs and points at the empty campaign bottle on the coffee table. “Oh dear…” Steve cringes a little and looks Y/N up and down who clings to him like an octopus, still smiling and seemingly happy. “Come on doll. Let’s get you to bed.”

“Nooo…” Y/N whines and bobs a little up and down. Another child. How does he manage to find people like that? Steve sighs and directs a stern disappointed-dad look at her. “You’re going to bed, young lady.” She pouts at him but stretches her arms out. “Carry me.” Bucky snorts at that but Steve picks her up like a child, she wraps her legs around him and cuddles into his shoulder until his eyes meet Bucky. “Ohh…. Pshhh, Bucky. Come, come.” She waves him over with a big smile and Bucky curiously does close the distance. Steve eyes her closely, at least what he can see of her. “What is it?” Bucky whispers just as loud as Y/N does. “Stevie’s in love with you.” She giggles a little more but presses her pointy finger on her lips. “Pshh, you can’t tell him I told you.” She giggles some more and Bucky smiles at her. “I promise.” His eyes meet Steve’s who feels his face burning with embarrassment. “I’ll be right back.”

“No Stevie! I want to talk to Bucky.”

“NO, you’re going to bed.” He starts climbing the stairs, happy that she stopped fidgeting in his arms. “Hmm… You’re so cuddly and warm. Like a bear.” She starts giggling again, leaning backward to look at him. Though she’s so fast that she almost doesn’t catch herself and send them both to topple over. Almost. “Careful!”

“You’re a bear! My Stevie bear!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Steve lets a small smile slip, seemingly enough for Y/N to giggles into a sigh, and slings her arms back around his neck, cuddling close. “I love you.” It’s whispered and silent but full of her emotions. Steve squeezes her a little tighter, placing a kiss on her temple. “I love you, too.” He walks into her room, settling her on the bed, shuffling a bit until he manages to get her under her covers. He presses the last kiss to her forehead. “Good night, Y/N.”

“No, Stevie. Stay.”

“Y/N, Buck is waiting.” He looks at her and back to the door, unsure of what to do. His fatal mistake is made as he gazes back at her, seeing her lower lip wobbling and her eyes starting to water. “O-Okay. Okay, but just a few minutes.” He watches her nod numbly, scooting over and rubbing her eyes. The moment he lies down beside her she drapes herself around him, clinging to him like a small koala. Steve embraces her, kisses her a few times on the head, and running his hands over her back and arm. “Stevie?”

“Yeah?”

“You won’t let him get me, right?” Her voice is shaky again, inducing Steve to stretch his neck to get a better look at her. He brings one hand up to cup her cheek. “Y/N. I will do my very best. He won’t get near you. I promise.” She stares at his eyes for a moment before she nods and settles down again, finally closing her eyes.

It takes nearly twenty minutes to get her to sleep. By the time he manages to detangle himself from her, he’s afraid that Bucky had left. So, he’s surprised to find him sitting on the couch, still waiting. “You’re still here!” Bucky jumps a little in his seat and turns around. “Of course, I’m here. Where should I have gone to?”

“’Dunno.” Steve feels a blush creep on his face and starts rubbing his neck in embarrassment. Bucky snorts but pets the free place beside him. “That was something, huh?”

“Yeah. Sorry.” Steve blushes, again, before he walks over to the brunette and flops down beside him. The other man smiles at him and crosses his arms. “So, you love me?” Steve’s blush deepens and he starts sputtering for words. “I- She- I mean I… Yeah.” He settles with a sigh, swallowing thickly. “Yeah, I like you. Like, really, really like you.” Bucky’s smile widens, turning into a bright grin, and he scoots closer to Steve. “That’s good because I like you, too.” He grabs Steve’s arms and leans in, Steve meeting him half the way. They kiss softly but lovingly. Steve slings his arms around Bucky’s waist with a hum. His brain shuts off, only having the decency to get swallowed up by the feel of Bucky’s soft lips once again on his. A small mona slips out of him as he feels Bucky’s tongue slide against his lips. Bucky breaks the kiss and leans a little away to look at Steve. “Should I leave?”

“No.” Steve’s voice is soft and fond, whispered. “Stay. We can watch a movie here. Get some more food.” Bucky’s smile widens and he kisses Steve briefly again. “Sounds good.”

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