#how is this surprising!?

[queer-coded-camaro-driver]

My boyfriend has been shocked to learn that Martin Short is, in fact, heterosexual. He’s sitting on the opposite end of the couch, furiously reading Wikipedia, muttering: “There’s no way this man is straight. There’s just- There’s no way.”

I am barely holding onto my poker face.

[zytes]

this manatee looks like it’s in a skyrim loading screen

[jonnywaistcoat]

Magnus fandom, 2016: We're horny for this lady made of worms!

Me: Huh. Unexpected, I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Magnus fandom, 2024: We're horny for this guy made of needles!

Me: Of course you are, my children. Be free.

Magnus fandom 2024: We're horny for this bulbous oozing clown man!

Me: I think 95% of your are being facetious, but the true 5% can go with god.

Magnus fandom, just now: We're horny for a member of the British Aristocracy!

Me: Gross. No. Absolutely not. Sick freaks the lot of you. I am officially kinkshaming. You disgust me.

[kimdokjas]

though the movie might be cancelled, yuri on ice will live forever in our hearts. thank you yoi fandom, it's been real ♡

[ink-the-artist]

Video game I saw in a dream. It was in this low poly style like an older video game. You play as this character I think was meant to be a lamb, or maybe a weird mix of a lamb a mouse and a rabbit, (while not really looking like any of those things) and you’re running away from a wolf. Your objective is to last as long as possible before the wolf catches and eats you.

The house you’re running in is endless and bizarrely put together like most building interiors in dreams are (like the infinite toilet dream dimension on Reddit lol) the layout of the house is pretty detailed, you can stop and hide in places like closets or bins while the wolf looks for you, you can go up and down stairs and into rooms etc.

You never actually know where the wolf is or how close it is to you until it appears in your line of sight, it makes no noise and the game gives you no way of knowing where it is, and it’s pretty unpredictable it doesnt move at a consistent pace. When the wolf catches you there’s an animation showing it eating your character

[greelin]

people when trauma victims act traumatized especially in a way that is unpalatable to them because it involves lashing out and unpredictable moods and having boundary issues rather than just being demure, sad, and consumable

[doctorsiren]

The books reveal that Ford is actually a secret partier

(Available as a print on my Etsy Shop)

(wips under cut)

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

woke up and someone spilled vanilla extract all over my dash, so as punishment you strange little beasties are getting all the VANILLA FACTS i know:

vanilla is the 2nd most expensive spice in the world (2nd to saffron)

which is why more than 99% of what we call "vanilla extract" is actually vanillin (vanilla's dominant flavor compound) and is not extracted from real vanilla.

luckily, even professionals struggle to tell the difference when it comes to things like baked goods. but there is a distinct difference in non-heat treated products like vanilla ice cream. real vanilla has a more complex, individualized flavor profile.

why is vanilla so expensive? because it is a ridiculously delicate & demanding crop. complete primadonna.

vanilla beans come from vanilla orchids. these crazy flowers bloom for A SINGLE DAY and have to be HAND-POLLINATED in a process that is exhausting, delicate, and requires specialist knowledge passed down over generations.

then, if you're lucky, you get vanilla beans.

which then require months of further specialized treatment.

the entire process takes about a year and can go wrong at any stage

vanilla has been cultivated for over 800 years (possibly much longer). the first known cultivators are the Totonac, an indigenous people of Mexico.

the Aztecs used it as a sweetener to balance out the bitter taste of cocoa. it was popular in a drink called xocolatl--the precursor to modern hot chocolate!

it is only pollinated by a very specific orchid bee!!!

which is why no fruit could be grown outside of Mexico until the 1800s

Edmond Albius, born into slavery, invented the pollination method we still use today--launching a global industry when he was just 12 years old.

today, the majority of the world's vanilla is grown in Madagascar

if you want real vanilla, read the labels carefully--it's harder to find than you think!

in conclusion, those tiny black specks you see in fancy vanilla ice cream? those are vanilla bean seeds! itty bitty orchid seeds!!! they are delicious and also a PRISSY BITCH!

(src)

[taiyo-tenebris]

My two pieces for the 2024 Pokemon TCG Illustrator Contest! I didn't place in the top 300 but I still had fun drawing it anyway.

[harrowedsoup]

I refuse to change my headcanon that most of the other people at Canaan House probably thought Gideon was Harrow’s pretty boy toy until she showed them she could actually fight because she acted exactly nothing like a real Cav in anyway. A teenage ruler shows up with a hot butch that clearly isn’t trained to be a ninth Cav or even a normal-ish one? Come on. They probably thought griddlehark were over compensating trying to hide by staying away from each other. 

[a-frog-in-a-bog]

that poll going around asking how often you smoke weed and almost a third of ppl saying they’ve never smoked before, and that poll that revealed that over a third of tumblr users have never kissed anyone before, proves to me that stoners who have gay sex are a small but imperative part of the tumblr ecosystem. Keystone species

[hinamie]

some quick jjk eye paintings

[chloesimaginationthings]

Have you made anything about how game Michael has a British accent and movie Mike doesn't?

YES I HAVE.. (here’s the og post)

[beybuniki]

they should go on a fishing trip pt.1