#how tf have i never done this before but i’m still doing a better job than you 😐

[lotus-pear]

I get you!!! I always love reading fics about my fav ships but it's. so very hard with skk because they are so rarely in character :( I just ended up stopping (and working on my own fics lmao) but yeah :( so happy you & everyone else can relate here, group hug!!!

THIS IS SOOO REAL i think my friend was making me read a mcd skk fic and i was actually disgusted by the mischaracterization in the death scene i was literally sitting there like 😟😟HE WOULD NOT SAY ALLAT

[sideeve]

can you do a miles e42 fix based off of broken clocks by sza

U LUV ME | with 42!miles

— it’s been 3 years since you’ve dated him. why he still talking about you like you together ? i’m not officially back but i just LOVE this concept. and i love sza🤭 ex!miles, both characters are like 17-18, reader has a younger sister, simp!miles fr, reader is still in love with miles but is stubborn, probably makes no sense whatsoever

“ma,” miles kneeled in front of you. “i’ll do anything to win you back. swear. i’ll drop the prowler job. anything.” his hands were wrapped around your legs as he begged for you to take him back.

“you swear?” you pull him up, he now towers over you. “swear.” his lip inch closer to yours “i lo—”

“WAKE THE FUCK UP!” your sister, nicknamed yaya, repeatedly hits you in the face with a pillow. “damn. i’m up, i’m up.” you sit up as she hits your back.

you grab the pillow, throwing it in her face. “i said i’m up.” “mama said you better be ready in 10 minutes or you’re gonna have to find another ride to work.”

you turn your head, looking at the clock.

it read 9:45.

shittt.

“get out so i can get dressed.”

*time skip*

you had barely made it in time for work. “hi, welcome to [ insert favorite cafe ], how can i—get out.” your voice was quickly filled with hatred. “chill, ma. i just wanted coffee.” the boy laughs. “not from here. go.”

you refused to serve him. you knew what was to come next.

“i miss you.”

“my mom won’t stop talking about you.” know well it was just him ranting about how he wanted you back.

“i want—”

“you want a caramel frappe, no whipped cream, a chocolate chip, warmed. i remember.” you deadpan. “i want something else.” your brows raise in shock, “so you have changed.”

“you.”

you groan. you bit your tongue, trying so hard not to yell at him to get out of your store. “i take that back.”

after completing his order, you slid him the drink and cookie, “that’ll be 12.65. cash or card?” he slid you a 50. “keep the change.” he walked off, sipping his newly made drink.

*time skip to the next day*

the day before was stressful. you had karens upset bc you didn’t give them a drink at 75 degree exact, too many customers, not enough staff. it was a miracle you made it out alive.

your sleep once you got home was well deserved. it was peaceful.

until the next morning. your phone was blown up by your best friend trying to get your attention.

[ name ] ! when did u and miles get back together ?

[ name ] girl wake the fuck up.

i know you see these messages. don’t make me come to your house.

answer me hoe😡

you quickly unlock your phone,

“tf r u talking abt?”

he posted on his private story. sum abt “when you two talk it out and cuddle” some shit like that. the caption had you name on it

your head hangs low when they sent the screenshot.

this motherfucker is really delusional.

“we never got back together. tf is he on?”

you threw on some clothes, storming your way to miles’ house.

you knew his mother had work at this time so you have no mercy to his front door. “miles, open this fucking door. imma kick it down.” your tone let him know you were pissed. he opens the door, “what are you mad about ma?”

you raise your phone at his face. “what is this?” he leans back, getting a good look at it. “oh, i was letting people know you’re mine.” you tilt your head, eyes squinted. “are you fucking crazy? what part of “we’re broken up” do you not understand? we ain’t together. end of story.”

he laughs, making you more upset. “that’s what you think. why do you think no one has asked you out yet?” he smirks. “because they know that you’re mine. anybody who wants you gotta go through me first. and you and me both know that’s not gonna end well.” he snickers.

“miles—” “i’m not done.” he cuts you off. “look, i know me being the prowler affected our relationship. but i’m done with that. completely. i’m focused on you right now. i’m tryna do better for you.” he suddenly wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him.

“i’m yours.”

you smirk at him. “and how do i know you don’t have any hoes in your phone right now?” “be reasonable right now.” he smile drops, his nostrils flaring. “okay, i was joking.” you laugh.

“so, what’s this mean ma?” you purse your lips, “i guess we can get back together.” he grins, pulling you closer. “you don’t know how much i missed you. and this ass—” his hands squeeze your ass before you smack his hands away.

“i can always change my mind, miles.” “okay, i was just kidding.”

[choices-binglebonkus]

With The Phantom Agent ending tomorrow (today technically, it’s midnight where I am) I’d like to do a little retrospective on the book by listing ten things it did right and ten things it did wrong. In my opinion, anyway.

#10 Right: The soundtrack. All of the music in this one is really good. I could listen to it for hours and not get tired of it. Very well done.

#10 Wrong: The pacing. I honestly can’t even really explain the issues I have with this story’s pacing. It feels very fast-paced but also really slow and glacial at the same time. I don’t know why that is, but I don’t like it.

#9 Right: The outfits. The outfits are generally very cute, except for the fem!MC’s “cold weather” outfit that exposes their midriff. Barring that one, the rest of the outfits are either pleasant or actually cute.

#9 Wrong: Lack of characters. A lot of modern stories have a pretty severe lack of major characters, this one included. The only major characters are the MC, Agent Gray, Vivian, and the Architect and the Contractor/Rowan but those are antagonists we don’t spend much time with. To have a small cast of characters, the few you do have need to be interesting enough to make up for the lack of other characters, and imo, the only interesting one of our group is Vivian. Which conveniently leads me to my next point, actually.

#8 Right: Vivian. No one else seems to like Vivian but I do. She’s pretty, funny, and she is a BEAST. I would pay 30 diamonds to give her back surgery because her back is probably fucked the hell up from carrying the entire mission. And even better, she’s not a reused character sprite! Hell yes!

#8 Wrong: The hookups. I may be in a minority here, but I didn’t enjoy any of the hookups. The only one I actually liked was Rowan’s, but the rest were very unimpressive.

#7 Right: The MC’s pronouns. Any story that includes GOC and pronouns is automatically that much better.

#7 Wrong: The MC. The MC was so incompetent at their job GAIA eventually thought they were a traitor when Rowan was revealed to be alive, in addition to being obnoxious and annoying throughout the entire book. Anyone who’s played Choices knows that if the MC is an unbearable knucklehead that the story isn’t going to be very enjoyable.

#6 Right: The fight scenes. Don’t get me wrong, this book is no TC&TF, but I had a lot of fun with the fight scenes. I thought they were pretty well written and engaging.

#6 Wrong: The rest of the writing. It’s not that the writing was bad, it’s just that it felt very constrained and unsure of itself. Like the writers had never written anything like this book before and were so nervous they’d mess it up that it affected the quality of their work.

#5 Right: Rowan’s romance. The romance scenes we got with Rowan were very few and far between, and yet the energy between them and the MC was so palpable. Their romance and love for each other felt so real and the longing was so present. How Rowan X TPA MC is such a brief pairing yet it’s so much more genuine and meaningful than most of the other modern book romances, I’ll never understand.

#5 Wrong: Rowan’s antagonism. Rowan’s antagonism felt very half-baked, and damn it, I’m gonna say it again. I’m gonna! Here goes: Rowan was WASTED and should have been the love interest. There. There it is. Once again.

#4 Right: Uniqueness in missions. If there is one thing that can be said about TPA, it’s that a lot of the chapters had us doing a lot of different stuff in the name of the mission. Gambling, auctions, infiltrating a hospital, there is no shortage of variety in the things we had to do.

#4 Wrong: Story similarities. As I played through TPA more and more, I eventually came to realize that as several other people have pointed out, it shares a LOT of similarities with Most Wanted and Crimes of Passion. Like, a lot of them. And also stop and consider that Crimes of Passion is still an ongoing series. Soooo…

#3 Right: Vivian’s diamond inventions. I personally didn’t buy any of Vivian’s special gadgets but I was so tempted to. I also liked how none of them were collectibles because let’s be real, collectible collections need to go like yesterday.

#3 Wrong: Everything about the Architect. And yes, I do mean everything. His design looks like a cross between an old man who would heckle me over gerbils if I still worked at the pet store and that one coworker who always steals peoples’ lunches, then lies about it and calls them bullies for calling him out. Overly specific comparison aside, I also found his motives very confusing. Like…does he want world domination? Redistribution of wealth? Death to the corrupt elite? I read all of his lore and background and I’m still confused as hell. I don’t know. He was just a lower-mid villain IMO.

#2 Right: Lack of filler. I never thought I’d see the day where another story arose with minimal filler. The story consistently moves forward and thank god for that, even if the pacing was kind of strange.

#2 Wrong: Sense of urgency. The sense of urgency in the book is hard to understand and appreciate fully because once again, the Architect and his motives are confusing as hell. It’s been hard to bring myself to care because I just…don’t care.

#1 Right: The MC’s loss and bereavement. The MC’s emotions surrounding the loss of Rowan (both times) was very jarring and strongly written. I could almost feel a fraction of the MC’s anguish just through the writing. It was the strongest writing in this book and they did a really good job here.

#1 Wrong: Everything about Agent Gray. I’ll try to keep it brief as I’ve talked about it before. Agent Gray’s sprites are all ugly. Their personality is stiff and unwelcoming and quite frankly I can’t even fathom why Gray and the MC fall for each other so quickly because their dynamic is so distant and icy. It only gets worse when you remember the impeccable chemistry between the MC and Rowan. Agent Gray was an all-around flop.

[futzilee]

Guys you'll never believe it I'm indulging in fanfiction culture (it's Chevron and Error time)

Who tf is Chevron? Maybe I'll post ab him once I uh. Learn how to draw 💀

Anyway

“Why do you ALWAYS show up whenever I'm trying to do something?” Chevron snarled as Error, as always, conveniently arrived after Chevron went to great lengths to get rid of Frisk. Error simply closed the portal he came through as Chevron snapped, “Don't you have the ability to destroy an AU without needing me to do the hard part? Oh wait, you can't. ”

Error approached Chevron, his yellow teeth in a wide smile. “You just make my life so much easier… it’s motivating to get to work when the work’s already halfway done, dontcha think?”

The human grasped onto the lingering soul and backed away. Error wouldn’t be destroying the soul this time. This time, Chevron was going to win, and figure out how to get the determination from the soul and put it into his own… somehow. He had practiced since the last time this happened… which was a staggering 3 days ago.

Error shrugged, scraped some monster dust off his teeth, and flicked it back into the dusty atmosphere. Chevron’s chest tightened. “You know, it sure would make my job a lot easier if you just handed the soul over this time. I’m still recovering from the last time you ‘fought’ me.” Error snickered and resumed closing the gap between himself and Chevron.

Chevron wanted to say something but felt Undyne pushing her way to the surface of his soul, leaving him completely unable to act for himself.

“You wanna say that again, PUNK?” Chevron challenged, the cadence of his voice changing slightly to better match that of the Royal Guard’s. He stomped his foot into the ground and grilled it in, leaning forward with his fists pulled up. “I’ll take you out in a fight ANY DAY OF THE WEEK! You’re nothing but a weak-headed, stupid-sighted bully and I, Undyne-Chevron, will strike you down!!”

Error simply waved away the absurdity. “Call me whatever you want. You’re just a freak anomaly that shouldn’t exist. I’ll actually get rid of you this time.”

Chevron huffed out a misshapen spear and clutched it in his hand, summoning more pathetic, crooked spears (half of them resembled unbaked cookie dough) and aimed them all at Error. “Aim” might be too strong a word. It was more like… they flew out in all directions and maybe one or two sort of flew towards Error. The skeleton didn’t even need to move to dodge the attack.

“Nyagh… what the hell?? Why isn’t it working?” Chevron tried summoning another magic attack, sweat quickly forming a puddle on his forehead. Error summoned his magic attack, a gaster blaster, and blasted Chevron.

Chevron forced his way back to the top of his soul, kicking Undyne out of the driver's seat. Though he hated it, Chevron knew this song and dance from way before he met Error. He healed himself with some spider cider he had snagged on his way through the Ruins and cast the magic attack he practiced: a swarm of magic insects.

Error desperately swatted at the bugs while Chevron took a much-needed breath from his inhaler. His attack didn't last long, dispersing mere seconds after swamping Error. The human grabbed at the soul again, Error having the same idea (only his idea of “grabbing” was using magic blue strings).

The skeleton yanked the soul toward him, forcing Chevron to trip and rip a hole in the knee of his black leggings. Error tugged again to get the soul loose from Chevron but he clutched onto it with vigor. Using his free hand, Chevron produced a shovel from his infinitely resourceful sleeve and batted at Error.

The glitchy skeleton threw his arm to the opposite side, slamming both Chevron and the soul into a cavern wall. The shovel went flying into a little pool of water. A cough forced itself out of Chevron's chest, staining the ground in front of him with a splatter of blood. He regained his balance enough to grab onto Error’s strings, going full feral mode and biting at them to try to cut them loose from the precious heart-shaped container of pure determination.

Error’s entire body spazzed out and his already poor eyesight worsened with the addition of a thousand “ERROR” messages. Chevron grabbed onto the strings and forced them off the soul, took another breath from his inhaler, and sent a much smaller wave of insects toward the other.

“UGH… This is so ANNOYING,” Error bemoaned. He took a step back, summoned a dozen more gaster blasters, and fired them willy-nilly. Chevron carefully danced around the Ruins to avoid getting hit and his soul stirred as such a beautiful place was set ablaze. Toriel couldn't stand to watch it, either. She forced herself to the forefront, just as Undyne had.

Wordlessly, effortlessly, Chevron summoned a fire attack and fired it at Error, who finally lost balance and fell into the water. He glitched tf out and fought to get out of the water but found himself slipping. Toriel retreated and allowed Chevron control over his own body once more. Chevron inched towards Error and looked down at him trying to make out what was happening.

“I'll just be taking this. Maybe someone will come and save you. Consider this,” he took another breath, “one victory for me.”

Chevron swung himself around when several red, glitched-out bones flew from Error and impaled Chevron's chest. They ruined the froggit hoodie, too. The human collapsed and coughed out more droplets of blood, clinging to the ground as if it were his lifeline. The ruined world around him blurred and in the corner of his eye, he saw two unfamiliar humans, a man and a woman, hovering over him.

Stay determined.

To ruin the mood, a dark puddle of ink formed just a few feet away from Chevron's dying body. Another skeleton-this one covered in epic paint-splatter tattoos-sprung out. He observed the damage and pulled out his paintbrush to fix the Ruins before returning to Mr. Spazz and Future Tweenage Corpse. He acknowledged the dust and the Frisk corpse and rubbed his eye sockets.

“Dream, I need you in here real fast,” Ink said to the static atmosphere, summoning another skeleton. This one had the coolest outfit of them all—a golden cape-dress-thing, a sleeveless top with bicep-length gloves, a bow (for shooting), and a crown. He was also the guardian of all positive feelings.

“Yeah, Ink?” Dream collected himself and observed his surroundings. “Ah, oh.” He looked down at Chevron. “There's so many feelings coming from them.”

“Cthulu?” Ink questioned.

“Stripe,” Error corrected, still spazzing out in the pool.

Ink was already spaced out from the conversation.

“No… his name was… um…” Dream pressed a thumb to his chin. “Shelly… no…. Shantel…tron? Anyways… it seems so crowded in there… how can so many emotions fit inside such a tiny person…?”

“Uh, yeah, that's cool,” Ink interjected, “but ever since Champaign showed up, they've been having these massive fights with Error and honestly I'd rather hang out in the AUs than protect them all the time, you get what I'm saying?” Ink's left eye looked like it was having a seizure as he tried to wink at Dream.

“You should want to protect the AUs, Ink, but… having Tron around makes it hard for me to find certain people. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?” Dream glanced at Ink, whose face was still seizing. “Oh, okay. I get the kid and you get Error?”

“Yes-siree!” Ink stopped making his face wig out and body-slammed Error out of the water, allowing him to finally stop glitching out. (”Dont TOUCH ME—!!¡¡!”) Dream carefully unskewered Chevron and helped him stand up. After a few pats on the back and some bs Dream magic, Chevron was back to normal. Health-wise. His hoodie and leggings were still ruined.

“What? There's even more Sanses?” Chevron mumbled.

Ink chimed, “Yup-! I'm Ink, this is Dream, and we're sending you on a deluxe vacation!”

Before Chevron could even think to respond, Dream and Ink shoved Chevron and Error through a portal where they landed smack-dab in the middle of an empty, foggy, miserably flat field.

[bokubonk]

the only certainty

warnings: angst, insecurities

content: hurt/comfort, angst, insecurities

characters: timeskip!Atsumu x reader

date: 2/11/21

word count: 1.4k+

notes: Okay so I know I said I wouldn’t be posting as much but I ended up coming with a ton of ideas so expect more updates soon lol. Also I just wanna know who tf hurt me because these ideas can’t be coming from nowhere. I’m really out here bawling while I write. Anyway, enjoy my blood, sweat, and tears :) 

You shifted on the couch, pulling the thin blanket up to your chest. 

Tears pricked at your eyes as you remembered what Atsumu said to you two days ago. The MSBY Black Jackals had a match against another team and you came to watch. 

You first met at one of his matches in high school and he began relentlessly pursuing you after spotting you in the crowd. Although you were determined to focus on school, you slowly began falling for him after seeing his passion towards volleyball and the kindness he showed you. 

Since the two of you met, you made an effort to go to all of his matches. After all, you wanted to support him and you knew how much volleyball meant to him. 

But, you were always bothered by how many girls were around him and how he seemed to thrive off of their attention. You mentioned it to him multiple times and he always reassured you that you were the only one for him. You would answer his reassurances with a smile that never seemed to reach your eyes because no matter how many times he assured you, it seemed like there was someone out there that was just better, prettier, smarter.

It was bad enough that you started off the day feeling insecure after you overheard Rina, one of his fangirls, talking about your relationship before the match and saying how Atsumu would be better suited with her. You glanced at her and her smile, noticing how tall she was, how confident, how different she was from you.

You only felt worse after seeing her walk up to him once the team won the match, and instead of finding you in the audience like he always did, he smiled at her. 

You watched from the sidelines, feeling your heart ache the longer he talked with her and your thoughts began to spiral. You couldn’t help but wonder why he chose you in the first place when it was clear he was better suited with girls like her. 

But you decided to say nothing, plastering on a weak smile and murmuring a quiet “congratulations” when he finally broke away from his conversation with Rina and approached you. 

Atsumu rambled on about the match as the two of you made your way out of the arena with the rest of the team and you could see that he was truly proud of how he played with the huge grin splitting his face. You felt your lips curling into a smile as you stared at him but your silence didn’t go unnoticed and he paused, his grin slipping from his face.

“What’s wrong?” his eyebrows furrowed, searching your face for any indication of what had happened. “Did someone say something?”

“It’s really nothing,” you shrugged, trying to muster up the strength to continue smiling to assure him you were okay but he cupped your cheek, leaning down to stare you in the eyes.

“C’mon, just tell me,” he frowned.

“It’s just-,” you started, biting your lip as your uncertainties began growing once again, “After the game, Rina went up to you and the two of you just looked so good together.”

Atsumu was expecting a real reason as to why you were upset but instead he got another one of your unnecessary insecurities and he just wasn’t in the mood after winning the match he had practiced so hard for. His hand dropped from your face and he ran it through his hair. “Stop making a big deal out of nothing. How many times do I have to tell you for you to get it in your head.”

You swallowed back your hurt and opened your mouth to change the topic but he rolled his eyes, “Why do you have to be so insecure? It’s not like I’m dating her.”

Atsumu waited for you to respond but when you answered with your silence, he sighed, “Look, can we stop talking about this? We just won and discussing how insecure you are is only going to ruin the mood.”

“Oh, um, okay,” you murmured, fixing your gaze onto your feet and blinking back your tears.

“Are you coming with us to celebrate?” he asked, not looking back while you trailed behind him and the rest of the team. 

“I’m not feeling too well so I think I’ll just go home,” you whispered.

“Whatever,” he muttered, too caught up in his own thoughts to realize just how much he hurt you. 

You went to bed alone that night, burying your face into your pillow to muffle your sobs. By the time you realized how late it was, you saw that it was 2:00 a.m. and he had yet to come home. 

For a moment, you wondered if he was out with someone other than the team but you quickly pushed the thought out of your mind once you felt your chest ache again. 

Thoughts of whether he still loved you consumed you and you felt the overwhelming pressure to do better and be better but you knew at the end of the day, it would never be enough. 

At the end of the day, you weren’t enough. 

You left the apartment early the next morning, wondering where Atsumu had stayed if he hadn’t come home to you. But you forced yourself to focus on your job, pushing all of your anxiety out of your mind, only to come home to an empty apartment. 

With a heavy heart you got ready for bed and set up a place to sleep on the couch, knowing that if he didn’t come home yesterday, it was most likely because he was drunk and stayed at a friend’s place and would be coming home today.

You laid there, waiting for the familiar jangle of his keys and pondered whether you were making the right decision. But when he opened the door and walked right past you, you knew there was nothing left to be done. 

“Hey, Atsumu.”

His eyes widened at your use of his name and he froze in place. You never called him by his name unless it was something serious and from how swollen your eyes were, he knew it was something you had spent hours crying over.

You took a breath, trying to keep your voice as even as possible, “I think we should break up.”

Atsumu stared at you, shocked. He didn’t expect you to want to break up with him but when he recalled the harsh words he exchanged with you after the match, he winced. He never wanted to hurt you and he opened his mouth to apologize but you began speaking, your chin quivering as you struggled to stop the tears from escaping.

“You deserve better than me,” your voice trembled. “I’m just going to bring you down with my insecurities and I don’t want that.”

You took a moment to compose yourself before continuing, “You deserve to be happy, even if it’s not with me.”

“Baby, no,” Atsumu cried, shaking his head. “No, don’t say that.”

“It’s my fault. I’ll do better just tell me you don’t mean that.”

You choked on a sob, unable to bear the desperation in his gaze. He rarely cried and in the moments that he did, you always tried your best to comfort him. But now, you weren’t sure you were the right person to be wiping away his tears.

“Please, I’m sorry. I love you,” he whispered, walking over to the couch and grabbing your hands in his. “You’re it for me. There’s no one else that could ever compare.”

You stared down at your intertwined hands, “Are you sure? What if choosing me is a mistake.”

Atsumu’s heart clenched at your words. He hated himself for never realizing just how unloved you felt. How did he never notice how much you were hurting?  How much had you been holding back from him because you were afraid of making him unhappy?

“You’re the only certainty in my life,” Atsumu murmured, his gaze softening as you began tearing up again. 

“Well, you and volleyball,” he joked, making you smile. 

“I promise I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you so you never feel this way again,” he vowed and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “I love you.”

You leaned into his embrace and whispered a quiet “I love you” back. 

You knew the road ahead would be far from perfect but you didn’t mind. Because as long as Atsumu continued being by your side, you had no doubt that everything would be alright. 

[totiredtowrite]

I love how everyones just agreed that daishou is a naga in a fantasy au

Snake

Warnings - cursing, unedited

Note: He could strangle me and I'd apologize. Also tf is his eye colour???

Male Reader - Fem Readers DNI or you're a horrible person who disrespects boundaries of writers :)

You had one job.

All you had to do was pick something up from the market. Your village healer only needed like ten things! Of course you just had to be the nice guy and get it for her.

Still though it was rather rewarding. She was a nice old lady, anyone in the village would do things to help her out. You sighed, furrowing your brows angrily. You should have just let Hanamaki do it. After all, he was the navigator. He'd done it before. He wouldn't get turned around at the simplest fork in the path!

With another heavy sigh, you pulled yourself off of the forest floor. No point in sitting about, right? The place was beautiful, even if it was a little too close to the swamps for your liking.

It's not like the naga and the elves hated each other. No, they were more just...wary. Existing so near to one another made sure that both always knew what the other was up to. You weren't exactly neighbours, (being almost a mile away), but there weren't any other villages in the area. Or, in the snakes case, nests.

Not to mention how the peace treaty kept them at a distance. Most of the younger elves in your village have never seen a Naga. You included. Not that you were that young, though you never had a reason. Training with Oikawa and the rest of the fighters in the village took up most of your time anyway.

Speaking of, you were starting to be thankful that Oikawa makes you train so hard. The walk was starting to near a couple hours.

You rubbed your face. This was bullshit. And how did you even get lost so bad you ended up in the swamps? Well, the outskirts of the swamps, but it still counts. The trees were starting to droop more, vines hanging off of every other one. You stepped in a puddle occasionally, cursing every time you did.

On the bright side, (at least), you knew now to walk in the opposite direction to get home.

You will walk in the opposite direction.

The...opposite...direction.

Or not.

What was the worst that could happen? You were already about two miles away from the market, and there were things in the swamps that you needed. You only had to go a couple yards in, it's not like you were going to wander straight into the heart of the nest.

You drew in a controlled breath. Naga don't typically take strolls along the outside of their nest anyways.

Taking another step in, you started to calm down. The only sounds you could hear were the birds and your own footsteps. The sound every time your boot collided with the ground was rather disgusting, the dampened landscape getting progressively wetter.

You were a couple minutes in, (still not having found the plant you needed), when you heard it.

Even never coming face to face with one, the sound was unmistakable. The only accurate word you could think of was slithering. Like a giant snake making it's way through the swamp.

You froze up instinctively, long, pointed ears twitching to try and catch the sound again. Nothing but your own laboured breathing.

Slowly, after a minute of a whole lot of nothing, your hand creeped towards the dagger in your boot. You knew it was just a supplies run, but better safe than sorry right? Maybe the Naga passed by already.

If you'd turned your head even slightly though, maybe you wouldn't have missed the pair of glowing green eyes watching you.

And maybe you wouldn't be in this position right now.

You couldn't describe how it happened because you weren't even sure how it happened. He moved surprisingly fast for how cumbersome that giant tail must be. Your dagger had clattered to the ground, the murky green blue of his tail coiled around your body.

"Well," his eyes still seemed to glow at you, "What's an elf doing all the way out here?"

You snapped out of your momentary entrancement to actually take in the situation. His eyes, slanted like all Naga, took in every little movement. He actually seemed relatively put together, hair looking tame and neatly parted to one side. His face was rather cut and slim, cheekbones sharp and pronounced. Hell, if he wasn't a Naga he'd still look like a snake.

His tail tightened around you slightly, urging you to answer the question. You sputtered a bit at it. "Well I could ask the same! Your kind don't wander the outskirts like this!" You attempted to sound commanding, hiding the discomfort in your voice.

Luckily he didn't pick up on the fear in your tone, instead giving you a harsh glare and momentarily squeezing you. You let out another harsh breath. "Well at least I'm on my territory."

You were about to retaliate, but you fell short. He was right in a sense. No words were exchanged for a moment. The snake leaned in further narrowing his eyes further, (if that was even possible), and studying your features. "So it's true then?" He finally said something.

You regarded him with confusion.

"About your kind," he poked at the satchel that you'd also dropped. "They're all pretty."

You blanked. You were about to comment on the fact that 'ruggedly handsome' might be a better term, but ultimately decided against it. All elves, regardless of shape or size, gender or skin tone, were ultimately just...better, in a sense. Stronger, faster, they lived longer, and, as he said, prettier.

"Have you never seen an elf before," You sneered instead.

"Have you never seen a Naga?" He shot back quickly, head tilting slightly. Seeming more comfortable, he had a sly smirk on his face.

You didn't respond.

He laughed almost tauntingly. "Dont look so confident elf," he leaned in closer, to the point where you could feel his breath on your lips. "What makes you think I won't wring," you felt his tail shifting, "You," it got tighter, "Dry?"

You attempted to scoff, the sound being cut short at the pressure on your chest. "And-" you took in a breath, "And break the peace treaty? No way," you let out a raspy laugh.

He let something else take up his attention. His hands lifted to your ears, long, slender fingers trailing along them and prodding at the pointed tips. You shuddered. His hands were cold. Unsurprising of course, but still catching you off guard.

"Would you cut that out! Just tell me your name and let me go!" You snapped.

"Someones impatient," he, quite literally, hissed. In all honesty, listening to him speak was somewhat addicting. You'd thought it was just a stereotype, how half snake people always dragged out the 'S' in the words they say. As it turns out you were wrong.

"Okay, let's just keep this civil." You exhaled slowly. "My name is (l/n) (y/n), I'm trying to find something for my village medic. Who are you?"

He eyes you suspiciously before responding. "Daishou. I'm just...patrolling."

You nodded, pushing your arms out slightly. You were still wrapped in his tail.

Sending your discomfort, Daishou loosened his grip. The sound of his tails grip going slack following soon after his realization. You sighed with relief, slumping to the ground as he repositioned himself to face you.

It took you a moment to look up.

"What are you looking at," he hissed at you.

In truth, everything. His scales were brighter than you thought Naga usually were, green blue and muted yellow. "Nothing," you said, mouth still agape.

"Right." He clearly sounded unconvinced, though he decided not to pursue the matter any further.

You had to admit to yourself, he was rather attractive too. He gave you another look at your continued staring. "What were you even here for anyways?" He slithered closer.

"Just- uh," you stuttered slightly. The tail made him look more dangerous than he most likely was. Or not, he might be just as dangerous as you thought. "I...forgot."

He couldn't stay composed, snickering at you.

"What?" You huffed and stood up, pulling your satchel over your shoulder once more.

"Nothing," he chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck, face going red. "Get back safely okay?"

You, confused at his little bout of care, nodded. "Okay."

You turned around, though just before you walked off he stopped you. "Oh, and elf."

You turned once more. "Hm?"

"Try to stay aware next time," he opened your palm and placed your dagger in it, another sly smile making its was onto his face.

"We wouldn't want another snake to catch you."

[shingia]

✗ HQ BOYS DOING YOUR MAKEUP

-> this random idea popped in my head recently and i thought it was pretty cute so here it is ( ͡❛ ‿ ͡❛)

-> general plot : basically, you broke your arm and need them to do your makeup for you 

-> suna, akaashi, tsukishima, semi, bokuto, kenma

— SUNA

• he’s living his youtuber fantasy, let’s be honest here

• and by that i mean that he records every step of the process. he also does this thing where he shows the products to the camera with his hand behind to make the lens focus

• i’m pretty sure he would sit you up on the counter and make you wrap your legs around him to keep him close (bye i’m evaporating)

• getting your eyeliner right on the first try is a huge flex for him. getting it even on both eyes is an even bigger one

• and he brings this up every time you’re mad at him

• « ok yeah i forgot to make dinner. but that eyeliner from last week tho… »

• most definitely has a playlist playing in the background, and you get to choose the songs because you don’t have anything else to do

• he only realizes how much he enjoyed doing this after many hours, and he probably ends up asking you to do it again at like 1am or something

• and if you accept, watch him go above and beyond to do better than the last time, because this time he is committed

• even if he knows you’re not going anywhere btw, he doesn’t really care he just wants to take a few pictures of you before you take it off and go to bed

• (he made her promise not to say anything but he definitely asked his sister for advice just because he wanted to impress you)

• oh and, he puts too much lip gloss on purpose, because he obviously has a good idea to take half of it off :)

— AKAASHI

• obviously he immediately accepts - with your arm in a cast, you could ask him anything and he’d do it in the blink of an eye

• he insists on watching a youtube tutorial because he’s not confident enough to do it without any guidance, and he follows it diligently from a to z

• he’s probably the slowest of all but that’s just because he’s scared of messing up

• and also because he thinks you look really pretty when your face is so relaxed, he can’t help but give it a few kisses every now and then

• after every stroke of the brush, he takes a step back just to make sure that it still looks good - and it does

• he also starts humming at some point, and he would be very pleasantly surprised if you started humming with him

• he refuses to use the eyelash curler because he thinks it’s absolutely terrifying (i have to agree with him)

• however, he asks a lot of questions about the rest of the products because he’s genuinely interested and wants to learn new things

• but tbh i don’t think he would be completely clueless, for him the basics of makeup is just general knowledge

• he also keeps a few samples of your products in his bag in case you need to do touch-ups during the day

• also he cleans the brushes when he’s done <33 what a king

• and he definitely offers to do your hair afterwards since he knows you’re struggling with it too

— TSUKISHIMA

• « not doing that, no way. ask someone else » is his first reaction. but it’s just because he knows he’s going to be terrible at it

• but he accepts after a few minutes of negotiation (because he wants you to stop whining)

• so you drag him to your bedroom and sit between his legs by the window to have a better light ; honestly, it’s ideal work conditions

• surprisingly enough, he does a very good job with eyeshadow. which means that his confidence is now through the roof

• but it all goes back down in a second when he gets started on the eyeliner

• he tries to avoid this step by telling you that you would look much better without - but you really really want to see him try, so he has no choice but to give it a chance

• it looks awful

• he gets it right after his fifth try tho, but your eyes are very irritated

• because he put so much effort into this eyeliner wing, he spends the rest of the day making sure that you won’t rub your eyes and ruin his work

• although he will never admit it, he thinks it’s actually a pretty fun thing to do and he wouldn’t mind doing it again

• but he would rather do it on a day where you don’t have anything planned, because he could start making out with you without hearing that « we don’t have time for that »

— SEMI

• oh it’s definitely not the first time, he’s already pretty experimented

• which means that you don’t have to check on everything that he does, just let him do his thing and you won’t be disappointed

• he probably asks you to show him your outfit so that he can do a makeup with matching colors <3

• there’s one thing that drives him absolutely crazy, and it’s dark red lipstick. so brace yourself because he will put it on you no matter what

• oh and, remember that tongue thing he does before his serves ? yeah well he does that when he’s applying the lipstick as well

• i think he would eventually want to try bolder makeup looks, and if you’re too shy to wear them outside, he would !hype!you!up! until you change your mind

• if i’m being honest : your makeup has probably never looked this good

• it’s pretty frequent that he ends up putting on some eyeliner on himself, and he wears tf out of it

• since he can get pretty protective, he’s usually not a big fan of other people praising you. but he won’t mind if someone ever compliments your makeup

• but what semi loves more than makeup itself is that he gets to take a very good look at your face from every possible angle

• and he loves to discover new things about you, like a hidden mole next to your ear or a dimple under your lips for example

• honestly he knows your face so well that he could probably draw a realistic portrait of you without looking at any reference picture

— BOKUTO

• really really excited about it, and also honored to know that you trust him enough to do that !

• so get ready to spend the next thirty minutes sat on the bathroom floor surrounded by literally every product you own, because bokuto is very curious about a lot of things

• he is so frustrated to see all the different eyeshadow colors and not getting to use them all

• so he’ll probably ask to do your makeup another time just because he’s really intrigued by ‘this sparkly purple shade’

• he’s also very interested in touching all the different textures of your products, so he tries them all on the back of his hand (which looks like a mess by the end)

• he has a hard time finding the angle he’s most comfortable with so he probably moves a lot

• one second he’s sat in front of you, the next he’s behind your back and tilting your face up

• i think he would definitely squish your cheeks with one hand while putting lipstick on with the other

• he also needs constant approval on his work so he keeps a mirror within reach and waits for you to confirm that it looks good every now and then

• you might have to lie to him on his first tries tho, because he’s definitely not a natural (but that’s ok, he’ll get better)

• however, he is always proud of his work and shows you off 10x more than usual for the rest of the day

• and he gets really sad when you take it off in the evening (cue sad puppy eyes)

— KENMA

• if kenma’s going to do your makeup, he’s going to do it right

• both sat on your bed, he’s holding your head still with one hand on your cheek. and don’t you dare sneeze, smile or breath too loud : he needs to focus

• he is so concentrated that he even sticks the tip of his tongue out, and he has a frown on his face the whole time, like a painter working on a million-dollar canvas

• especially for mascara, he’s so scared to poke you in the eye that he requires absolute immobility

• and yes, he will get mad at you if you start to laugh or move too much, i mean come on he’s trying to do serious work here!

• but he just looks really cute when he’s so focused <3 you can’t help it

• however, he goes back to being his laid-back self as soon as he’s done. and he spends a lot of time staring at you for the rest of the day because he’s lowkey proud of the result

• also, don’t let him do your makeup in his bedroom, because the light coming from his setup is probably terrible - so you’ll have to drag him out i’m sorry

• he might lay you down on the couch and straddle you so that he can rest his elbows when he leans forward to reach your face

• oh and : seeing you wear « his » makeup and his clothes simultaneously drives him absolutely crazy

@toworuu @catwithangerissues

[daydream-believin]

MERLIN’S APPRENTICE & MERLIN’S CHAMPION || trollhunters

warnings: swearing

a/n: if rott gave me anything it gave me this idea

I KNOW I SAID “JUICY” BUT REALLY THAT WAS JUST THE ANGST POTENTIAL,, THAT IM NOT INDULGING IN THIS POST IM SORRY LMAO

OKAY WHAT IM REALLY TALKING BOUT HERE IS A GOOD MERLIN/ARTHUR BUT IT ACTUALLY WORKS

no sorry i haven’t seen bbc merlin don’t come for me i’m ignorant

OKAY SO

we know douxie kept an eye on the human trollhunter and co

but douxie’s really having a hard time convincing himself he’s just doing his job

he’s actually enjoying this a little too much despite how boring staying in the shadows is

and he’s kinda worried?

so he’s got this bright idea: you know what would better help him keeps tabs? if he befriends this person

and so he does

fuck merlin’s shadows

sod the rules

ofc he’s very up front about knowing they’re the trollhunter and that he’s merlin’s apprentice

we wouldn’t want that to become a huge festering secret that eats douxie from the inside out until the inevitable reveal when merlin calls them both to help with the arcane order and they realize they’ve both been lying to each other’s faces for months/years and neither of them know if they could ever trust the other again, right? — phew *catches breath*

but before you know it, mr. casperan and mx. trollhunter are best friends

he’s basically the toby to your jim

and you’re very happy to have a best friend like douxie

he understands that monster hunting hustle

he’s the only person you can vent to and actually talk about what’s going on without sounding like a loon

and douxie likes being able to tell someone all his frustrations with merlin, since you’re also in that boat with him

you spar sometimes. it’s fun, but you’re very careful not to accidentally hurt your friend (he’s extremely careful not to hurt you or wound your ego by effortlessly wiping you out)

ofc, there’s the occasional, brushing of hands, faces a little too close together, accidentally winding up on top of one another, purposefully winding up on top of one another 👀 you know how sparring be

you and douxie are a duo. a duo who have become trollmarket’s resident troublemakers, to vendel’s exasperation

you guys tease each other a lot

you do a lot of stupid shit, cause hey, now you have magic armor and a magic sword and a magic best friend, did you think you wouldn’t get up to some shenanigans?

douxie is your impulse control and he’s not a very good one, as he’s just as bad

truthfully archie has the brain cell

and pranks? gods the pranks. you two are always either pranking each other or you’re teaming up to prank some other troll who said smth mean to you in the pub. vendel had to personally put a stop to it (read: chew you out)

doux thinks the world of you tho, you’re such a noble knight, and likes to tell people about how you’re a cinnamon roll, so innocent, so pure

and then they meet you and you directly contradict those statements

trollhunter: i’ve never done anything wrong in my life, ever

douxie: i know this and i love you

(spoiler: you’ve done lots and lots of wrong)

doux spends an awful lot of time slinking around trollmarket now, and he’s in the know for everything that’s happening

(no more being kept in the dark for this wizard apprentice)

and doux knows merlin won’t completely approve of this, but hey, it’s not like he’s helping and thus directly disobeying

really, he’s not helping you at all, it’s really fucking annoying

okay so mayyybe the occasional healing spell. you’ve got those puppy dog eyes he can’t say no to

but you understand his sense of duty, or whatever it is that drives a follower, technically being a follower of merlin yourself

you respect the old geezer (as you have not been turned into a half-troll yet) as a wise mythical figure, and as your best friend’s father

and what a perfect match you are for each other, champion and apprentice, mutually being screwed over by a guy you both think has all the answers

you and douxie help each other grow in your self-worths, that you two are more than the chances merlin has given to you

unfortunately, mortifyingly, you have caught feelings.

douxie has also caught feelings, and is saying nothing yep you have enough on your plate without him putting this on you so he’ll just quietly pine and suffer don’t mind him choking to death in the corner when you take off your helmet and throw back your hair

y’all’s problem really starts manifesting itself as protectiveness. you are really protective of your wizard and he is really protective of his knight

lots of things said that are Not What Friends Say but neither of you really want to be the one to point that out

lots and lots of i love yous that slowly get more and more serious until it’s not exactly platonic anymore

and it’s just really nice to have someone to get coffee (or your favored hot drink) with at four in the morning after a tussle with a troll

and that’s basically how you and douxie spend the bulk of trollhunters, just vibing

as much as you can vibe, with all the changelings and shit trying to murder you all the time

then merlin wakes up and shakes up your world

you are aware of your impending doom

you’re aware of it

merlin keeps looking you up and down like he’s mentally making up the measurements of your coffin

and tbh the idea of fighting gunmar freaks you tf out

and you’re supposed to win that fight?

gods

you’re preparing for your nightmares coming true soon

truthfully you knew your fucking job had a 100% mortality rate

you don’t want to die with regrets

so

you spill

you spill all the things you’d wanted to tell him and how much he means to you and that you couldn’t bear it if you were a goner before he knew

miraculously, douxie feels the same and tells you all the things he’d been holding back and and what you mean to him and how much he wants to protect you, that you’re gonna make it, if he had anything to say about it

and everything is perfect for one night

now you have a real reason to win

not that saving humanity isn’t a big responsibility on your shoulders and definitely A Reason

but knowing douxie’s waiting for you, for the life you’ll build together after this, the peace you’ll both have, it’s absolutely a big motivation to give your all and come out victorious and survive

hahaha loser you don’t know about the arcane order

and then merlin uses your microwave to cook a weird potion

you and merlin are alone in the house, but there’s no real mind games necessary. you may have grown past thinking he was a god, but in the end, you’re still a follower of merlin, and if merlin thinks this could give you an edge, well, who are you to question his methods

doesn’t mean you aren’t nervous as your master hands you the bottle

yet you don’t even hesitate to drown yourself in the black abyss of the tub

whatever it takes amirite?

and now you’re a half-troll

a sexy half-troll, if you do say so yourself

yeah, no ‘i’m a monster’ angst here, you’re loving the power-up

you’ve got to treat it like a cool new power-up or you will cry actually tbh i lied about the no-angst thing a new body is disorienting

your only real concern is douxie

not concerned for long tho, he sees you and the first thing out of his mouth is “nuclear!”

and he senses your concern, so he does go out of his way to assure you that boy, girl, enby, or half-troll, he loves you for your soul, darling

also again half-troll! you is hot as hell so he’s not really losing anything here 👀

he makes sure you know that too, not to let any insecurities fester

him raking his eyes up and down you gives the opposite effect of the dread merlin sent down your spine doing it

anyways,,,

doux helps out a lot more in the eternal night

like helps merlin re-defeat and re-seal morgana

he’ll do it again in few weeks but with a bigger role you know, this is practice

thank merlin for that edge YOU ARE THE LAST TROLLHUNTER YOU ARE VICTORIOUS YOUVE GOT GUNMARS HEAD IN YOUR HANDS HAHAHA

but now you’ve got to go to new jersey

douxie’s been instructed to stay in arcadia tho 🥺

it’s okay, you’ll see each other again soon

sooner than you realize

and until then you talk each other to sleep every night over the phone <3

merlins glad, actually. he’s glad hisirdoux found some solace. even if it is with the lamb he was raising for the slaughter. maybe things will go okay for them. the time map suggests it might be so

hisirdoux may have done things in a way he didn’t quite approve of, but that’s because he’s becoming his own wizard, and merlin is proud

[srirachvbi]

Sakusa and Ushijima taking care of their kids headcanons !

request:  Can I request Sakusa and Ushijima taking care of their baby when their mom!s/o isn’t here ?

a/n: yesss omi and toshi taking care of their kids when they’re babies aslfjkd i love this. tysm for the requests !! i’m really happy to be writing again since i took a break for a bit after school ended!! warnings: manga spoilers, panicking and confused fathers lol

SAKUSA KIYOOMI

why we going so fUCKING FAST DAMN WOAHHHHH

He had the week off from practices and anything else because they had just finished off the season

You, sadly, did not get the same luxury of having a whole week off because even tho your husband made enough money, you still wanted and needed a job

So you had to go to work and your guys’ nanny had called and been like “yo im sick as fuck” and Omi went “ahaha don’t come near us <3″ 

It was too last minute to hire another nanny, but he’s perfectly capable of taking care of your guys’ two month old child... right?

Wrong

It had been a few hours since you had left for work and he was having some weird staring contest with Hitoshi 

Omi knew that Toshi was going to use his diaper soon enough and he just... he was in fear

After sitting there for a few minutes, he started stress cleaning and ended up gearing up to change Toshi’s diaper

Omi: *is literally performing rituals to make sure he doesn’t get anything on him*

Hitoshi: 👁👄👁 pls clean my asscheeks i pooped <3

LMAOOO the second Omi smells the wonderful stench, he almost walks out of the house

Actually he starts to until Toshi starts sobbing and he just

“👁👄👁 they ask you how you’re doing and you have to say that you’re fine--” 

He’s wearing like an N95 mask, silicone gloves, goggles, boots (he doesn’t want to get anything on his feet if he drops it but he also struggled because who tf wears shoes in the house)

Apparently him now 

Disgrace

Toshi’s still crying and Sakusa’s really about to as well LMAO

He finally gains the courage to try and change the diaper and he begins

Even with the mask on, he can still smell the shit and he’s really about to curl up and die

Slowly he peels the dirty diaper off and internally cries as he brings it towards the trash can and realizes he just

didn’t grab another diaper

So Hitoshi’s still sobbing and Sakusa’s running across your guys’ apartment in search for the diaper box

He finds them after like three minutes and is sweating hard

Omi walks over to Hitoshi again and he’s still sniffling after crying nd he feels bad

Like yeah he hates cleaning up shit but that’s his poor son :(

So he cleans everything up and puts a new diaper on

The rest of the day actually goes pretty well unlike the half an hour where he lost probably ten years of his life

You end up coming home around 7pm and walk in on Omi cleaning the table which had food splattered everywhere

He looks so stressed and your guys’ son is just laughing so loud

You end up laughing with Hitoshi and Omi’s like “i think we need a divorce <3″

Jk

He’s actually about to cry because you’re finally home to help him with Toshi

“Never leave again” “👁👄👁 that sounds a little creepy, Yoomi” 

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

You were actually hanging out with your high school friends and he offered to take care of Riko instead of you dropping her off at your parents’ house 

He’ s a good dad!! it’s just... he’s a bit clueless sometimes and babies cry a lot

So there are moments where you’re not sure if he should be by himself with her

dw he’s gotten better since you guys first had her-- he no longer stares at Riko and asks her why she’s crying for five minutes

Anyways

He’s honestly kind of concerned that he’s not the most skilled father

Like, he’s used to being the best so why does he struggle with being a dad?

This;ll be an opportunity for him to learn !!

You actually left before Riko woke up again so he was just sitting in your guys’ shared room waiting for her to make noise

You guys have a baby monitor and he stares at it sometimes

The poor machine is super intimidated

When she starts crying, he literally sprints towards her nursery (it’s quite a sight) and accidentally opens the door with too must strength, which leads to it hitting the wall

Cue Riko crying even louder

He’s standing there like

👁👄👁

It takes a few seconds before he’s apologizing to her LMAO

“Ah. I’m sorry.” *crying gets louder*

He picks her up carefully and looks her dead in the eyes, making her stop crying

They’re staring at each other now

SHhhh they’re communicating

“I’ll give you food.” 

She was actually hungry

You’ve seen him do this-- yeah, you’re not sure how he does it either

So he brings her to the kitchen and she’s pulling on his hair

He do be used to it tho 👀

It takes him like ten minutes to find the milk formula thing because every second he tried to put Riko down, she’d cry

So he adjusted and has her literally in the PALM OF HIS HAND

It takes a longer than necessary to read it because he started reading the ingredients and all of the information on the back

Pls Ushijima... 

He throws that bitch (not literally) into the microwave and heats the milk up for her

Meanwhile she’s started to chew on his hands and he’s so confused

“Why are you chewing on my hand? It is not food, Riko.” *CHOMP* 

When her milks done, he struggles to figure out how to hold her but it’s okay, it works out in the end

The rest of the day is full of the same confusion and by the time you come home, you see him reading the ads in Riko’s childrens book to her and she’s passed out

“Waka-chan, you don’t have to read the ads” “But she enjoys them.” 

...

Fair enough 

[soldmysoultootomeboys]

Demon MC with Human Obey Me Brothers Reverse AU

Okay but what if the brothers were all ‘normal’ humans who ended up summoning a demon, who is MC.

I’m in love with this idea. Lowkey might write a fic about this  jk...unless? Levi’s was surprisingly the most fun to write. Also I guess tw for normal demon things??? Nothing too graphic tho

Part 2

Lucifer

As a human he was a high ranking businessman. While still a formal person on the outside he had a perverse interest in the occult that he hid from the rest of his coworkers.

Due to his important position and large pay he manages to get his hands on some rare books on demon summoning. After a lot of research he tries them out.

When he summons you he doesn't look surprised or afraid and is quite clinical about it at first. The first thing he does is bind your powers so they can never be used against him. After he informs the rules you must follow if you're to be living with him.

Even as a human he is quite prideful and controlling and he wants to remind you who's really in charge.

At first he only sees you as a demon. He lets you do your own thing when he isn't ordering you around and when the two of you do go out in public he only introduces you as an acquaintance of his. People are rather surprised at this as he's not the type to walk around with others and rumors quickly fly off about you two.

It's not until you two are walking home from a shopping trip that you really start to bond. It was a late night and no one was around so the two of you take your time, enjoying the cool air and stars.

All too late that you hear the click of a gun. From the shadows steps a man, weapon pointed straight at you. Seeing your nonthreatening human form as well as Lucifer who practically reeks of wealth he thought the two of you easy targets. Wrong.

With inhuman speed you lunge forward shifting into your demon form. The gun clatters to the floor as you rip him to shreds with no remorse. It's only when Lucifer finally calls you away that you realize he's dead.

Once you manage to get home he is immediately lecturing you about how risky the actions you just did were. Someone could have seen you or more importantly seen him. What would you have done if the cops got involved? Eat them?

Once he's done though he thanks you and a few days later a gift ends up in your room. He never claims it, even though you can smell his cologne all over it.

After that night Lucifer treats you different. Not better, but not worse either. If anything he's a bit kinder but in a cold sort of way and he keeps his distance when anything gets too serious. At first you think its because he's scared of you. It isn't till he finally approaches you, a stern look on his face and orders you to transform that you realize he was working up the courage to see what you really looked like.

The pact urges you to turn, so you do and you let him examine you, circling several times. He's most interested in your wings, asking if he could touch them and when you consent he gently runs his hands over them. Despite you being a demon he treats you delicately shifting aside feathers with a careful hand and running a light fingertip over leathery skin.

It's a strange feeling at first, but not bad and you're practically purring by the end

After that he asks to see your true form more and more

Mammon

He didn't mean to summon you.

He just wanted to make a quick buck. It was getting close to Halloween people were starting to be interested in demons and spooks once again. That's why he thought it would be a great idea to start a seance business.

Twenty dollars for him to pretend to summon a demon, maybe shake a table once or twice, have some scary sounds playing in the background, nothing too big. Who would have known that the book he stole as his main prop would really work.

When he first sees you he screams.

He immediately tries to shove you back into the book to no avail. As he has no clue how to get rid of you he ends up stuck with you, a terrifying demon.

At first its very easy (and amusing) to scare him. Bear your teeth, mumble in a made up language, threaten to rip him to shreds.

You can actually see his soul leave his body when he faints.

However in typical Mammon fashion he gets used to you surprisingly quick, especially when you don't come through on your promise to eat him.

After that he figures that together the two of you could start scamming people for even more money. After all, he does own a real live demon now.

You two make bank stealing and tricking people. With his knack for creating schemes and your powers the two of you are rolling in money in no time, although it always seems to be lost pretty quickly thanks to his terrible gambling habits.

It's in the middle of a heist that something goes wrong. Someone, you don't know who you can only hear the click of a revolver, pulls out a gun. With lightning fast reflexes you’re tackling Mammon shielding him with the tip of your wing and just in time as something is shot into it tearing through muscle and sinew.

The urge to rip them to shreds overtakes you, growing with every second that your human is in danger. But there was so many of them and you couldn't protect Mammon and yourself at the same time. The need to get somewhere safe is much more important so you leave.

It's only your quick reflexes that get the two of you out alive.

When you finally get home Mammon laments over all of the money he lost on the deal. acts like it doesn't affect him. His complaints last exactly till he sees the blood staining your form.

He almost faints right there.

Once he recovers he's immediately running to get ice packs and gauze, fussing over your injured wing. It's obvious he’s worried even though he tries to hide it under his tsundere act. When you’re finally bandaged up he thanks you glancing at your wound the entire time.

It's hard not to appreciate the gesture.

You just don't know how to tell him that your going to be perfectly fine in like two days (thank Diavolo for demon healing)

After this you two are a lot closer. Even before you were friends, but now the relationship has morphed into something different.

The two of you do less dangerous scams and while Mammon doesn't act too different he gets super weird when you're too close. Blushing a terrible crimson and freaking out when you touch.

Even for a demon its not hard to see that he has a crush.

Levi

Also summoned you on accident.

He was actually trying to summon Ruri-chan. You have to admit when it comes to her he does his research. Drew a full pentagram and everything and as a final touch placed a little plushy in the middle.

He absolutely panics when you arrive here instead.

Used to humans being afraid you, you ignore him at first. You fall to one knee eager to pledge your loyalty in exchange for his soul when you land on something squishy.

Pulling it out from under you see a plushy??? Of some anime character??? TF???

This pulls him from his stupor and he snatches it from you and begins to lecture you on the importance of Ruri-chan and anime on human culture.

You have no clue whats going on at this point.

When he finally stops talking he actually gets kind of excited. He summoned a hot demon??? Woah! This is just like his anime 'I accidentally summoned a demon from Hell who became my roommate and now I might be falling for them.' 

At your confused look he immediately turns it on and has you watch it. You two end up having an entire movie night together.

After that the two of you mostly act like roommates.

He often compares you to his favorite series TSL where 7 humans summon a demon named Henry and go on crazy adventures with him. The first time he accidentally calls you Henry he blushes like crazy.

At first he acted like you were annoying him most of the time but it was pretty easy to catch on to his tsundere act. He actually loves having you around and will whine when you have to leave. He says its because he can't play two player games without you but you know the truth.

On the rare occasions the two of you go out he gets jealous of anyone with even the slightest interest in you. Your HIS demon why are you giving someone else your attention?

Its pretty easy to distract him though. Just the slightest touch and hes flushing and stuttering. You can do whatever he won't get the hint that you like him the most.

'There's no way you meant to do this. This must be some weird demon norm I don't know about. Yup that's it.'

Satan

Summoned a demon on purpose. And not just that summoned you on purpose.

With his extensive library he had more than enough information to figure out how to summon a demon. After that it was just a matter of choosing which one. He finally settled on you.

You don't need to worry about explaining how a pact works to him. He already knows everything on it. Maybe even more than you. Nerd.

Don't express this opinion out loud. He will be furious.

Even so he'll still make you tell him about summoning a million times just to see if you know anything different.  

Mostly you’re an over glorified assistant/labrat to him. MC grab that book. MC draw this summoning circle. MC stick your hand in this flame.

Of any of the brothers he is the one who sees your demon form the most and the one who asks the most questions about it. You have very sharp claws what are those used for? Four sets of wings? I wonder why you have so many. Slitted eyes? Do you have any idea why they are like this?

He is very interested in the differences between humans and demons so you end up performing a lot of tests.

He would also be curious about the celestial war and your part in it. Its up to you to choose to answer him or not.

If you ignore any of his questions he will get annoyed and be snippy. But just tell him an interesting tidbit about hell and he'll be back to normal in no time.

As for his actual job he works as a researcher at a big lab. You go there often to help him with his work. He used to have a lot of assistants but none could handle his terrible rage.

Its one of the reasons you work so well with him. An angry human? That's no big deal. Now if he was a demon that would be something to talk about

His tantrums are actually kind of cute. Like a fussy kitten.

Telling him this has a 50/50 chance of either making him blush or rampage.

If its possible he uses you to annoy his colleagues

Janice talked shit about his theories on planetary alignment? Poison her

Jk not really but maybe just, like, make her day a hundred times worse?

Thanks MC you're great

A power team at its best. His need to get back at people he hates works well with your general need to cause mischief 

Asmodeus

An orgy summons you obvious reasons. Although technically not the one who summoned you, you end up making a pact with Asmodeus before the nights over.

It was inevitable really, of all the humans there how could you not choose him? His overblown confidence and cocky insistence that he was perfect was practically adorable. I mean here you are, a demon of all things, and yet this little human is here insisting that he was perfection himself. You just wanted to eat his soul right up he was so cute.

To him its obvious why. After all, he was so beautiful that even demons fell in love with him, he couldn't blame you.

Even if you tell him the real reason he won't believe it.

Immediately starts bragging about how he could seduce demons

If you leave a pact mark on him though he will complain

As for actual duties you don't have a lot

At parties you work as his wingman but at home the two of you have more of a domestic role. He treats you more like a best friend than a demon.

He has a lot of spa days, something he immediately insisted that you take part in too.

One day you bring him a bottle of demon moisturizer. Big mistake

When he finds out about all the different demon beauty products he immediately orders you to get him some.

Your poor wallet.

He's always ordering new things. He really wants to go down to Devildom so he could look himself instead of having to order off Akuzon. One day you'll figure out a way to show him the eternal night.

He's also very flirty towards you, something your not surprised about. Hes always on your lap or petting your head or asking for affection, and he constantly alludes to the things the two of you could do. As time goes on he begins to get even more needy, sometimes ignoring others at parties just to flirt with you. He wants all of your attention all of the time.

Beelzebub

Did not mean to summon you but now that your here hes pretty okay with it

Of all the brothers he the one to treat you the most like another human.  

However you have one duty that you take very seriously

You must protect his brother, no matter what.

Other than that you two are like roommates. He doesn't really ask you of much except to keep the fridge stocked (which is a bigger job than expected this guy eats a lot) and he'll take care of the rent and everything else.

Sometimes he'll ask if you want to head to the gym with him. You thank your demon metabolism since every time you end up going he always stops for burgers and shakes at his favorite place on the way home.

He lifts a lot for a human, no surprise since you've seen how sculpted his body is. Seriously he's like a Greek statue. You spot him while doing reps and help correct his form while necessary. It's a bit of a switch from dealing with demon biology to human biology though so you have to make sure that you don't accidentally hurt your new friend.

Sometimes the two of you have movie nights, although its more of an excuse for him to buy a bunch of human food and you to buy a bunch of demon food and pig out. He still manages to out eat you somehow.

Occasionally the two of you will go out with his brother Belphie although it usually ends up with either you or Beel carrying him when he falls asleep. But it gives you time to chat with Beel on your own which you don't mind

The two of you end up with a good bromance, sometimes minus the b.

He treats you like an old friend and even ends up telling you about Lilith, his dear sister who died when a car hit her. He had only managed to pull his brother out of the way at the time and he still remembers it well. You can practically smell the guilt that hangs off him when he tells you that. It's hard not to feel touched after that story even for a demon.

He confesses a lot of things to you, things he has a hard time saying to other people. He never calls upon his pact to swear you to secrecy. He trusts you.

Belphie

Also summons you on purpose

When you first meet Belphie he's angry, uncontrollably angry. It's at the point where it almost surprises you. After all a human filled with so much wrath is no small feat.

His first order is a tough one but one you have no choice but to accept. 

Kill the man that murdered his sister

The two of you work hard to hunt him down, spending many days brainstorming late into the night. Although it always ends up with just you working, as Belphie has the strangest tendency to fall asleep while talking. (Narcoleptic maybe? Or just lazy?) Whatever the case you don't terribly mind.

Even just his presence helps, in some strange way.

When you finally track him down Belphie insists on going too. He wants to see the man die with his own two eyes.

It's not a hard fight but it is an emotional one. Through the bond you two share you can feel Belphies anger, his pain, his desire for revenge, and then finally an emptiness.

When its over the two of you go home, still covered in whatever bits of him were left. Belphegor shows no emotions and you wonder if hes in shock from seeing someone die so suddenly, but all you feel is a tired yet content thrum through your bond.

When you finally get home Belphegor immediately tries to go to sleep and its only through a little nagging and a lot of manhandling that your able to convince him to shower first. By now the bloods beginning to dry into a nasty goop and once he's done you jump in too, soothed by the steam and clouds of soap drifting around you.

To no ones surprise Belphie is asleep when you get out. It's then when you realize that you have nothing left to do. 

With that one action your purpose here is done, and yet your pact remains. Your thoughts begin to rise Belphie who clings stubbornly to sleep. It's no use though. The two of you are too connected for it to stop. 

You hear the sheets rustle and he raises one hand patting at the covers. A universal sign to come here.

"You're so loud" He mutters even though you haven't said a word. "Just sleep already."

A useless answer but a comforting one. You curl up at his side, feeling the tiniest bit like an obedient dog, but his arm settles over your shoulder and he drapes himself over your chest erasing the thoughts from your mind.

You eyes flutter close, at least for the moment. You can decide what you should do when you wake up.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Top 5 Character Deaths That Made Me Side-Eye the Writers

There are a lot of character deaths in TWDG... obviously. It a series about the literal dead walkin’ around and eating people, so as you’re playing, one of your favorite characters is bound to meet such a fate. To give this series credit, it does have quite a few well-executed deaths that, while I hate them, they have a purpose in the story that works. 

The best example of this is Lee’s death-- we all hate that Lee dies, but it’s well-done. It serves its purpose, it acted as both a shock and a slow-burn for the player, and left us all an emotional mess. 

However, we’re not talking about the “good” deaths today. No, we’re talking about the character deaths that are poorly executed, cheap, lazy, and just plain dumb... they’re the deaths that make me side-eye the writing team and wonder what the fuck happened there. 

By the way, it was reeeeeeal fun narrowing it down to only five deaths, because it seems like for every great death, there’s at least two bad ones.

5. Mariana and her death that ruined ANF’s potential story

I’ve talked at length about Mariana’s death and how much I hate it. Like, I get it TWDG... you love your sudden deaths and you’re so edgy for killing off a child character because you’ve never done that before... but maybe consider things a little further before pulling the trigger?

Yeah, killing off Mariana the way they did got a reaction outta people when it happened, and we got the burial scene if you stayed with Clementine... but you didn’t consider the future of this storyline? You pretend you did by name dropping Mari when it’s convenient, but then throw it out the window when it comes to characters like David or Gabe.

Listen, I know that ANF is a mess and what’s the point in telling the mess that it’s a mess? Well, I’m still annoyed at the writers for wasting the biggest opportunity for this game’s story, something that could’ve saved it from being a mess.

And I get it, you gotta make a death quota, so instead of killing Mariana off... why not kill Kate off instead? Oh no? We don’t get the stupid love triangle that no one actually enjoys or is engaged in?

Instead of this dumb story about Javi falling in love with his sister-in-law but oh no David’s back.... we could’ve had a story about Javi losing Kate and being left to care for two children by himself. Mariana and Gabe are all he has left, and he going to do whatever he can to keep them safe all while the three of them are mourning Kate.

Then David comes back, and he immediately takes these kids away from Javi.

There is no stupid storyline with Kate, but an actual conflict between two brothers who were never on the same page and two kids caught in the middle.

Plus, Mariana herself as a character really could’ve brought something to the table. She could’ve brought out a lot in David’s character since she seems to be more like Javi.

Her death is just... annoying. It’s frustrating when you know they could’ve told a better story with her alive, something ANF desperately needed.

My side-eye is one of disappointment and annoyance.

4.Luke and his easily preventable drowning

Ugh.... where to even begin? 

Luke really just gets butchered as a character throughout the second half of S2, and the writers end up demolishing the set up they placed at the beginning of the season for a Luke vs Kenny thing. 

Why? Well, Luke vs Kenny was the initial ending they were gonna go with, but because this season went through all kinds of bullshit, they scrapped that and replaced Luke with Jane... and it’s so dumb.

Hell, it kind of ruins a lot. Not only did it ruin Luke, a character that many players loved, but it forces the new character of Jane, who we only get two episodes to get to know, so they can fade Luke out. 

But that’s not all. 

His death is so... ugh. It’s stupid, okay? Stupid and easily preventable, but noooo... we gotta kill Luke off for reasons because all we know is that S1 killed off a lot of characters and we’re gonna do that again but worse because we failed to understand what made those deaths impactful in the first place. 

Lots of character death and despair = good game. 

Yep, uh-huh. Okay. 

So we all know that Luke’s leg is hurt, yeah? Great, so you’d think that the group that has an injured man and a new born baby would be extra cautious and go around the frozen lake. Yeah, Arvo says that it’s safe but let’s not take any chances. 

But no. We gotta go across like a group of dingdongs and whattya know-- the ice begins to crack beneath Luke’s feet. Now, even here, we coulda got him outta there safely... if Bonnie wasn’t a dingus. 

Think about it. If we shot the walkers who were coming towards Luke with all their weight, he could’ve slowly scooted away, even if he’s already fallen through. BUT NO. Bonnie either guilts Clementine into going towards him, adding more weight to the already fragile ice as Luke tells her to stop, or Bonnie will go over there herself... and she’s a full grown woman soooo her weight breaks the ice. 

Good job, you dipsticks. 

When you have to make your characters into morons in order to move the plot along and kill off characters....maybe do some rethinking, yeah? 

 3. Mitch and his shock-value death

This death is so dumb... so incredibly, dumb. Even now, I can’t help but give full side-eye to the writers every time one of them tries to justify this death. 

I’m sorry, but this death didn’t have the impact you wanted it to have. And because there’s always someone who says, “Mitch didn’t die for shock value, you just can’t tell the difference between a good and bad death” lemme tell you a thing. 

What was the point of killing of Mitch? Well, according to those who worked on TFS, it was to show that Lilly and the delta are serious. This is when shit gets real, and when Lilly is established as a bad bitch who will do whatever it takes to get what she wants. We should be scared of her now. 

Except no. 

This scene doesn’t tell me that Lilly is a bad bitch. It tells me that she has good reflexes, and going off her reaction after killing Mitch.... I’m not fucking scared of this dumbass. If anything, this scene says more about Mitch than it does Lilly. It says that Mitch is also a dumbass for running at her like he did. 

Y’know what would’ve been more impactful? If Mitch didn’t immediately get stabbed in the throat, but instead, actually got her on the ground and struggled with Lilly. Then, Lilly gets the upper hand and when you think she’s about to send Mitch to the cart, she fucking murders him in front of everyone to prove a point. 

There’s no remorse, it’s slow enough for Lilly to actually process what’s happening and show that she does know what she’s doing. That would scare me. That would show me that these people aren’t fucking around and they’re willing to kill some of them if that means getting the rest for their army. 

You still get your shock value death but it actually does something other than kill a character off. 

I’m really supposed to believe this is the same Lilly who can order to have Louis’ tongue cut off? 

But it doesn’t end there. No, no... there’s another part to Mitch’s death that annoys me, and it’s how insistent everyone was that his death is going to have a greater impact on the second half of the story. It had a purpose within the story, we did it for a reason.

...I mean, it has an impact on Willy and his arc for the second half. 

But that’s it. 

Oh... oh, what’s that? Oh, you were referring to those throwaway lines about Tenn? “He was screwing up again, just like when he got Mitch killed.”

OOOOOH.... I see, that’s what Mitch’s death was really amounting to... some lines dealing with whether or not AJ shot Tenn. Well, I guess I was wrong. Mitch’s death wasn’t just shock value. It really had a big purpose. In fact, Mitch’s death has the biggest impact on the series. Fuck Marlon and Brody’s deaths, and Lilly and James, and hell, fuck Tenn’s death, too. They’re meaningless compared to Mitch’s death. You did it, guys. You really did it. 

....Okay, I’m done. I’m just... salty, I fully admit. 

Being serious again, Mitch’s death is probably the worst in TFS as far as unpreventable deaths go and the real reason I side-eye the writers is because they tried to tell us it was going to have this huge impact in the future and it just... didn’t. 

2. Nick and his offscreen death.

I’m sorry, but what the fuck happened here? Why- what are you- how the hell did this happen??

I’m actually baffled. 

Someone wrote this. 

They set up at the end of ep3 that Nick is shot.... then ep4 comes and we find him like this. I just... did someone on the writing staff not wanna do their job that day? Someone was working on the story and at the last minute forgot Nick was a character, so they were like “Eh, he’s not important anyway, and it adds to the shittiness of everything so we’ll pretend this was 100% intentional.” 

Nick was one of your more interesting characters and you really thought killing him off like this was the way to go, huh? 

Like, his first death is shitty, but in the very least it kind of makes sense. 

But this? 

This is horrible. If I wrote this, I’d be embarrassed. 

I just... I’m so tired of S2 right now. 

This is at #2 because it’s just lazy, bad writing. At least with Luke, Mitch, and Mariana, we got to see their deaths and they had some, even if just a little, impact on the story afterward. 

But Nick? 

Nothin’.

Even Luke, who is the closest person to Nick, name drops him maybe twice? It’s just.... nothing. 

And yeah, you can come at me with the “oh well not every death has to have meaning!” 

This is a story, okay? This is a story crafted with characters who have arcs by people who wanted it to be a success, and usually that means having satisfying conclusions.... or, intentionally unsatisfying if that acts as a natural conclusion to their story or is a reoccurring theme. 

Nick’s death is just the writers falling flat on their faces and hoping no one would notice. 

1. Sarah and both of her shitty deaths. 

Ugh. UGH.

Okay. 

I’m not even side-eyeing anymore-- I’m fully glaring.

I don’t have to tell you how shitty both of Sarah’s deaths are. We all played S2, we all know that no matter what you do, Sarah dies in ep4. You can try to save her, she lives a little bit longer, and then falls to her death... and both deaths have her being devoured alive by walkers. 

Now, this is enough to annoy me. First off, I guess my choices don’t really matter. Sure, you can justify this as one of those “sometimes you can’t save someone, no matter how hard you try” ...and fine. Sure, if they had bothered to execute that point well, then great. 

But I disagree that the writers had that in mind when they were killing Sarah off. 

In fact, I know what what going on in their brains-- “God, can’t wait to kill Sarah off! Give us any reason to do it! She’s so damn annoying!”

The writers have openly admitted that a lot of the team were just waiting to kill Sarah off, waiting for any reason, so when the major part of the community who take everything at surface level because why think? kept complaining about Sarah, they jumped on the opportunity to kill her off.... but the deaths are dumb.

Listen, this isn’t like when the writers planned on killing Lee off. You can plan a death and even be excited about it because you’re excited about the story and execution of it all. You can be excited to see the heartbreaking end of this character’s story that you crafted because you know you put everything you had into it.

These deaths were lazy and the product of a team who didn’t care about the character. Sarah dies and no one cares. 

Sure, you leave her to die the first time and Jane does her thing about how you can’t save everyone, she talks about Jaime, and then Luke exposes himself as the fake Luke by agreeing that leaving Sarah behind was probably the right thing. Like what?

Now as much as I hate that first one, the second one is even worse. 

For some reason, Sarah is standing in the corner while they’re trying to fight off the walkers instead of being inside with Rebecca... y’know, where she would be if this was logical. 

Then the deck breaks and Sarah falls, trapped under a pile of wood. Jane, despite being the one who sees Sarah as a liability, goes down there to try and help her after Clementine begs her to. 

But because the writers don’t know what they’re doing, Jane gets hit by a random piece of wood and can’t get Sarah out in time, leaving her to be eaten alive by walkers. 

Then AJ is born and no one cares about Sarah ever again. 

I just.... 

Could’ve had an interesting story arc with a character who just lost her father in such a gruesome way, a character that already deals with anxiety and other problems that you never bothered to explain other than “she isn’t like Clementine” and you could’ve had her grow. 

But I guess that would’ve taken effort.... and screen time away from Kenny, and god forbid we ever do that. 

---

Honorable Mentions

-Ava falling to her death in the most comedic way possible, made even more hilarious by David’s two seconds of mourning. -Omid.... because hope is dead. Do you get it? Hope? is dead? Because Omid means hope? Do you get it?? -Honestly you could put most of S2′s deaths on this list because oh my god. -Ben because I’m still a salty bitch.  -I also wanna add Louis and Violet’s deaths on the bridge mostly because they die, Clem is sad for two seconds, Tenn says sorry, and then no one cares. Yeah, yeah, they mourned off screen and I call that lazy bullshit. -Hell, throw Tenn’s death on here, too, for similar reasons-- no one but Louis/Violet and AJ seem to care. Even Clementine is like “whatever” after it happens. 

---

Y’know, picking this one seemed like a good idea at the time, but by now I’m just annoyed by all these dumb deaths. So, what are your thoughts? Are there any deaths that make you question the writers that didn’t end up on the list? Do you agree or disagree with my list? Lemme know, we can have a friendly discussion about it. 

Have any suggestions for future T5F’s? Feel free to send ‘em in! :D

---

Next week’s T5F Top 5 Favorite Louis Moments

[anunvalidcritic]

Justice League: Snyder Cut

(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.)

Oh, the time has come my friends! Now, I originally did a review on Batman V.S. Superman and I didn’t care for it, so I deleted it. But before I start, I would like y’all to read this statement made by @verified-villain-fxcker - You can click HERE to read it. As I stated in my repost, I couldn’t have said it better. May Autumn Snyder continue to rest in peace. Let’s get started!

It’s been so long since I’ve made a post I can’t even remember how I do this LOL.

CLARK is outta there to say the least...

WONDER WOMAN and LOIS look flabbergasted, as they should... BRUCE as well.

Talk about a shock-wave scream 

All jokes aside, the hate that LEX has towards SUPERMAN is just to much energy to be giving to another person..

THESE BITCHIES ARE READY

why are they letting a minority approach the fucking the cube?!?!

*insert travel montage scene here*

                      Part 1 - “Don’t count on it, Batman.”

BRUCE knows damn well he’s talking to AQUAMAN. Let’s move this shit along lol

“Oh Gotham? How’s that shit hole?” - AQUAMAN

Ik these bitchies aren’t singing rofl

I’d sniff anything wore by Jason Momoa too.

“Maybe a man who broods in a cave isn’t cut out to be a recruiter.” - ALFRED

TALK YO SHIT ALFRED!!!!

AMY ADAMS can literally take my heart, step on it, throw it in a river and I still wouldn’t be mad. 

Here comes the lovely WONDER WOMAN!

broooo her hands were moving like Donnie Yen in Ip Man!

Fucked that entire ceiling up

Ofc the one who tried to touch it would make the stupid statement. 

STEPPENWOLF is really wildin’ out

Don’t look back! I hate it when they look back!!

These are some strong as women!

                             PART 2 - “The Age of Heroes”

“It’s toxic, that’s good.” - STEPPENWOLF

I can only imagine that this is how toxic people think. 

this dude really just threw that lil demon fella like it was nothin’ lmao

You know you're working at a job for too long when you say this is the first time in a while that they're going home early smdh

Now that shit was pretty lit....

SILAS thinkin’ shit I better check on my son. 

“You know a lot about monsters, don’t you? Especially how to make them.” - CYBORG

If that isn’t teen angst, then I don’t know wtf is lmao

Seeing Gal in this tomb makes me want to re-watch Wonder Woman 1 all over again!

DARKSEID ol’ trifflin’ ass

plopped him down like he was dirty laundry

God bless Willem Dafoe, this man is a fuckin’ legend!

“This world is divided. They’re a primitive species. Unevolved and at war with one another. Too separate to be one.” - STEPPENWOLF

DeSaad kinda looks like Doctor Doom in the Fantasic Four reboot lmao

GREEN LATERNS!!!!!!!!!!!! OH SHIT!!!!!!!!

we really need a Green Lantern Corps moving...

ZEUS + ARES = A Dynamic Duo When They Aren’t Being Dicks To Each Other

You know I feel bad for man because all they did was bury that shit in the ground rofl

                  Part 3 - “Beloved Mother, Beloved Son”

BARRY + IRIS = Love at First Sight 

The burger can’t be that good like damn. 

Bro the detail on his fucking shoes and the glass!!

ROFL PLEASE TELL ME HE TOOK THE HOTDOG FOR HIS DOG!?!? 

damn did the car really need to explode...

lol BARRY must really need the job lol

... I would’ve just played dead after he threw me against that rock...

Man of Steel probably has one of the best soundtracks not just for a superhero movie but just in general

Americans love their football!

I have this love-hate relationship with CYBORG being in the JL and not with the TITANS you know since he’s a kid, but he’s a college student in this one. 

Thank God DIANA spoke with VICTOR instead of BRUCE because I honestly don’t think he would’ve gotten him on board.

Everyone can literally zigzag zoom across this planet at undeniable speed except for BATMAN lol

Come on, VIC, help the lady out.

You know honestly, BARRY has a pretty cool pad for someone who's trying to get by paying for a Criminal Justice Degree. 

“A very attractive Jewish boy. Who drinks milk, I don’t drink milk.” - BARRY

“Fuck the World.” - CYBORG

dang Ik DIANA has every right to grieve over STEVE, but damn that man has her whipped!

“You’re looking at the hottest thing on Earth. The exact same thing I said to my prom date. She dumped me anyway.” - RYAN CHOI

Why does MERA have an accent in this but not in AQUAMAN?? (ik the answer)

DAAAYYUUUMMMN MERA TURNED INTO A WHOLE BLOOD BENDER!

                               PART 4 - “Change Machine”

CYBORG just glided over silently

STEPPENWOLF + WONDER WOMAN = EPIC FIGHT SCENE

Seeing BARRY move like that to stop the debris and to ping DIANA’S sword really is amazing..

But he should not be screaming like that LOL

How do you not remember the planet that’s habitants almost killed you?? Because if that was me, I wouldn’t have forgotten that shit at all!

 Would've held a big ass grudge until I could go back. 

“I know we’re all thinking the same thing right now. Who’s gonna say it? I’m not gonna say it.” - BARRY

WOOOAAHHH J’ONN JONES?! (forgot about that)

 “There are six, not five. There is no us without him.” - BRUCE

Damn, no faith at all 

                         PART 5 - “ALL The King’s Horses”

ICONIC DIALOGUE

BARRY - “Wonder Woman. What do you think, man? You think she’d go for a younger guy?”

VICTOR - “She’s 5,000 years old, Barry. Every guy is a younger guy.”

I would’ve kept swippin’ that ID like a cashier at Wal-Mart swippin’ a debit card.

They're movin’ a little too slow for me. Ik they’ve never been on the ship before, but I would’ve been zoomin’ through that entire ship just to hurry and get the job done. 

NOT THE PREGNANCY TEST

Damn, they couldn’t have at least picked up the photo??

The foreshadowing was spectacular! It will always amaze me. 

I’m sure Allstate will cover that person’s car...

Just when LOIS was about to move on. 

CLARK grabbed DIANA like miss me with that Rafiki shit.

I would’ve come back to my senses too after looking at Amy Adams. 

AQUAMAN + THE FLASH = A CONUNDRUM

DR. SILAS takin’ one for the team

                              PART 6 - “Something Darker”

As crazy as radiation is, it’s quite an amazing spectacle.

I wish this Justice League movie could’ve held off until we got some other heroes such as the Green Lanterns, Hawkgirl, and many others. 

Our generation was truly blessed to have an incredible actor as SUPERMAN, and we are not putting him to use!

JONATHAN sounds like President Biden lol

Alright, team?! Break!

AQUAMAN is totally enjoying this fight. He rode that Parademon like a surfboard.

AQUAMAN + CYBORG + FLASH = *THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN*

I swear every scene that WONDER WOMAN enters into does not fail to include the “Ancient Lamentation Music”. 

VICTOR hurry up and say “one” god damnnit!!

SUPERMAN COLD!!!!

Somebody needs to put this fight on WorldStar

BARRY = HE’S A RUNNA HE’S A TRACK STAHHHHARRR!!!

THAT WAS FUCKING IMMACULATE

The Unity  = The Three Bitchies

I bet DARKSEID will remember that shit now

                        EPILOGUE - “A Father Twice Over”

VICTOR = A Final Requiem

LOL VULKO and MERA look stressed tf out!

“Uh, I have too much to live for. And more important things to do.” - LEX

A cocky motherfucker LMAO

Alright, we’re back in this type of dream sequence. 

“Who have you ever loved?” - MERA

Uh, bitch his parents, Robin tf?!

Thank you, JOKER, for stating the facts for Ms. Fish-stick

 Oh shit, they let LOIS die, goddamn it!

HARLEY’S DEAD TOO?!?!?!

BRUCE LOOK SICK AF!!!

Well, the dream is over once again...

I just don’t see how people can live with all those fuckin’ windows. 

“Oh, and some have called me The Martian Manhunter.” - J’ONN

Alright...

________

Yes, the movie was long but what needed to be expressed was. As we already the Snyder Cut wasn’t supposed to be seen because a father simply wanted to grieve the death of his child. I’ll once again reiterate what @verified-villain-fxcker you don't have to like the film but at least give it the benefit of the doubt from its predecessor. For me, I did enjoy watching his version, but let’s be honest what he who shall not be named did was just fucked up. 

[still-a-morosexual-help]

AAhh I really like 45 it pushed the story along while also being just hilarious and touching and it was just so good!! 46 was just pokemon battles...

OBEY ME! LESSON 45 DETAILED SUMMARY

At breakfast the most of the brothers crowd around MC and ask them how different appliances work, Asmo apologizes for them and then immediately asks MC something as well and well Belphie calls him out on it he says he hasn't been in the human world for a really long time and things have changed. Beel says that the human world progresses so fast that it makes him dizzy and Asmo says maybe it feels like that since the devildom doesn't progress. Lucifer tells MC to get ready to leave once they're done eating (still on the white couches is2g this pisses me off so much) and when MC asks him wtf he says oh yeah forgot you nearly died while Solomon told you about getting a sorcerer's license. MC's got a meeting with Solomon and Beel & Lucifer were asked to come along. Mammon & Asmo protest cause they can't tag along.  Belphie says that Beel and Lucifer were probably chosen cause they'll at least appear as mature functioning adults.

They meet up with Solomon in front of the Sorcerer's Society HQ, which according to Solomon is filled with "Pompous Uptight Bureaucrats". It provides assistance to sorcerer's living in the human world and provides them with first a provisional license and then a full license that'll allow them to practice magic as they pls more or less. Lucifer's like; that's great and all but why the fuck are we here. And Solomon tells him that he'll understand when they get inside. Lucifer says that sounds exactly like something someone who was seconds away from causing problems would say and he tells MC to brace themself.

The backgrounds for both these lessons are really good! Right so when they walk in sorcerers start ooing and awing over Beel and Lucifer - they've never seen them irl before, one even wants their autographs. Apparently Solomon's apprentice taming the 7 rulers was believed to be an urban legend?????????? I dunno imagine going from being a normal human to becoming an urban legend amongst sorcerers? Lucifer thinks Solomon brought them along just to boost MC's reputation (ohhh the poor man). Solomon reveals that he isn't on good terms with the society (is it even a surprise?) and being his apprentice would just make things harder for MC and that he established the society with his previous apprentice long ago but they had a falling out and now that apprentice runs the society (is it sad that there's a huge possibility that the falling out could be food related?). Solomon says he brought the brothers as bodyguards for his cute apprentice/charming apprentice/favourite pupil (If he keeps talking like that whoever runs this place is gonna deck MC) since back in the Celestial Realm the two of the were known as "the two greatest champions and protectors of the CR". Beel gets pissed off cause he thinks this means Solomon is putting MC in danger and Solomon says 'lol that's definitely not who I'm putting in danger' and when Lucifer picks up on that and questions Solomon on it he goes 'man look at the time we really gotta go get MC registered WOW'. The dude at the reception uses his staff to etch a magic seal that's the society's crest on to the back of MC's hand (I really feel like you should tell someone beforehand that you're gonna give them what is basically a tattoo? Also cant wait for that butcher to see this and the rest of MC's harem and come to the conclusion that they're in a cult) which consists of  3 staves and 7 stars signifying the 3 Magis who are believed to have invented magical arts and the 7 virtues (is it bad that before i even started om i knew what the 7 sins were but only had a vague knowledge about the 7 virtues? I wouldn't have been able to name them all without this lesson :/ anyway they're humility, generosity, gratitude, patience, chastity, temperance and diligence. Something i really like is that the brothers have all displayed the virtues that directly oppose their sins on a semi regular to regular basis).  To get their license apprentuces must earn the seven stars via passing 7 trials with the first of the trials being set and judged by their master. (ok so I assumed each test would focus on a brother and MC'd earn the star that opposes each brother's sin and would pass the test by learning and displaying the virtue of that star. But that isn't what happened here? If anything the test was there to teach Lucifer humility? Is that how it will go? will each test somehow focus on MC helping the brothers learn and display their opposing virtue even though all of them have already displayed this virtue to some extent?  I mean I guess the main point of the tests were to show that MC could control the brothers so that makes sense? but even though this test did focus on making Lucifer let go of his pride, the test was about MC learning to control Beel's power and these two lessons are very much focused on Beel so was the star they earned actually temperance? Even though the test didn't have anything to do with that virtue? Ahh i have so many questions about how the stars are earned and neither lesson really clarify it and if anyone wants to come debate about this???)

ANYway Solomon uses a spell to bind Lucifer in place, which pisses Beel off, tho when MC stays calm and just observes what happens Solomon is pleased assessing a situation before taking action is important (Ive had this HC for a while now but solomon is definitely the kinda teacher who throws you into the deep end with just a cryptic warning and watches with a smile as you try to figure out how to not die, if you do something particularly amusing while struggling he'll give you another cryptic hint, occasionally he'll yell out praise with that smile of his even if it looks like you're actively drowning and dying and failing). They start to get an audience while Lucifer threatens Solomon and shifts into his demon form and goes also im still fucking pissed off about that lunch so/ Beel also shifts and threatens Solomon, tho lucifer tells him to stand down cause he wants to murder solomon on his own and that a mere binding spell won't hold him down, Solomon's like Jeez chill it's for MC's exam you fucknugget and Lucifer's like oh shit yeah but you know i'll actually kill you for this later and Solomon's like yeah that's cool and also imma use my powers to make you into the size of a barbie doll and lucifer's like what-  MC then proceeds to lose their shit over a tiny blushing Lucifer. MC's test is to keep lucifer safe for 24 hours which would be fine if they you know didn't live with the other 5.  which is actually what lucifer says when Beel says it'll be easy if they just stay at home cause home according to lucifer also contains his '5 greatest enemies'. MC's job is to protect Lucifer from them without using any commands on anyone other than beel, and the goal is for them to be able to fully command beel like they did with Asmo in S1 against Henry 1.0. Beel is not allowed to act on his own to protect lucifer and can only act on MC's commands.  Beel agrees, Lucifer swears and Solomon asks MC about their confidence levels. MC can promise one of the three of them that they won't mess up.  Solomon says he'll stay in the house with them so that he can judge and Lucifer's more or less like; you're having fun aren't you and solomon says Duh.

So they end up at the café where predictably Luke & Simeon end up screaming and laughing at a blushing pissed off mini Luci, Simeon tells him they physically cannot laugh cause of course big scary Lucifer is now in Simeon’s words ‘Teeny-Tiny” & how he’s so cute he wants to keep him in a jar as a pet (God I love this lesson).  He says Michael would love to see this and when Lucifer yells at him he completely ignores him to poke his cheek (V Relatable). Luke also wants to join in on the fun but Lucifer is a little bitch to him and as retaliation for scaring their son MC pokes luci on the cheek too. Beel laments about wanting to poke luci on the cheek too and when Solomon tells the others to stop teasing lucifer, luci goes, EXCUSE ME WHOSE FUCKING FAULT IS THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE. Beel notes that luci now smells human. When luke asks about the smelling thing beel says that all 3 species? races? Smell different. Simeon marvels at how much humiliation PrideTM is willing to take cause he’s simping for MC. Luci tells them to shut tf up cause unless they come up with a plan to deal with his hell children they’re probably going to kill him the second he steps foot inside the house. Beel tells MC to use his powers. Luci says they should be able to draw out Beel’s powers like they did Asmo’s in S1. Solomon says since he gave them a power up in S1 simply saying the incantation won’t work this time around and they must first fully understand Beel and his nature to be able to do that. MC has a flashback to the Butcher and his relationship advice and then asks Beel what he thinks they should do to be able to better understand him (while I do think ideally this is the right choice, in context with the other two choices, to me, this is the ONLY choice cause the other two come off as slightly yandere on mc’s part). Beel chooses spending time together via sleepover. But obviously Luci will have to come along and Solomon invites himself along too cause he’s still the judge.  Simeon’s sad about not being able to join in and luke is TOTALLY NOT JEALOUS OKAY!?!?

Outside the house Luci, Beel and MC all make pledges like they’re invading enemy territory; Lucifer: Swear you won’t let your guard down. Beel: Swear to protect Lucifer with your life. MC, 100% seriously: I Swear. Solomon: Are yall fucking serious??? These are your fucking brothers???? You practically raised them??? Lucifer: Have you ever actually met my brothers???? Beel: You legit think they won’t give up their lives just to fuck with lucifer for a day? When Solomon asks what lucifer ever did to make them hate him so much he says he doesn’t know. And look while “locking me up in the fucking attic for a whole year”, “not acknowledging that you’re actually my father and taking some fucking responsibility” and “blaming every minor inconvenience in your life on my very existence” are all very valid reasons none of them actually hate him right, cause I mean using every chance you get to fuck with your siblings is just part of being a sibling?  Which is what Beel and MC both tell Lucifer. Lucifer doesn’t believe them and actually seems sad about it. Solomon said “while I do find the complicated interpersonal dynamics of your family fascinating” my ass is freezing out here. …Do you think they’re like solomon’s favourite show??? I mean Solomon’s old as shit and probably doesn’t remember what it’s like to have a family, and before MC, Simeon and the student exchange he didn’t really have anybody so do you think he just watches the brothers + MC like ‘damn, this shit is wild’????????????????? The instant they enter the house, someone casts a spell and they’re pulled into a portal. The fuck did you say about everyone loving Lucifer, says Solomon while making direct eye contact with Beel. They fall through endless darkness and MC tells them to chill cause it only feels like they’re falling. They end up in a weird ballroom/royal courtroom kinda place, which Solomon marvels. Beel & MC recognize the place as a location from one of levi’s games and meet Levi in his TSL clothes who welcomes MC as the ‘hero’.

Beel, Luci & Sol kinda just wordlessly stare at levi with tired expressions and MC being the bro they are plays along with levi by asking if he is who they think he is. He introduces himself as The Lord of Shadows, the ruler of all 7 lands. Lucifer: WTF. Beel says they don’t have time for games and Levi gets upset that they’re making him look pathetic. Levi gives MC their mission – to save the world by defeating the demon lord satan. Lucifer tells Solomon to get the fuck out of there. Solomon says he can’t considering he has no idea where the fuck they are in the first place. Beel politely asks ‘his majesty’ the way to pantry and Levi yells at them to take it seriously. Beel says well ok and explains the whole test thing to levi as a way to explain why they can’t play. Levi says satan already knows this. After that there’s a flash and black smoke starts curling up around the room and satan turns up in his demon form. And LOOK I hate satan’s demon form outfit but it actually looks really good in this context??? The feather boa and ribbon bow thing really works with the curling black smoke, evil demon lord look. It probably helps that you can’t see his bottom half. Anyway Satan turns out to just be a magical projection and he says, well you’ll have to come to me cause I kidnapped your boyfriend, while Diavolo calls out to Lucifer and MC from off screen. Diavolo had run away from the devildom to surprise the brothers. While Lucifer scolds Diavolo and while Diavolo apologizes, Satan tells they must all come to him along with the “obnoxious talking doll”. Lucifer: the fuck did you just say. Ok this part is really cute; Satan: “I’ll be seeing you MC.” Diavolo, still off screen: Can’t wait to see you MC! Luicfer has a migraine. When Beel tries to say they should head off, Levi tells them they forgot something in RPGs. MC, still dutifully in character, asks the lord of shadows to give them aid. Levi gives them 100 grimm and just anekfnsndfjn the fuck can they do with just 100 grimm. Which is what both Beel and Luci say. Solomon says, well maybe they’re just fucking poor around here so everything here is cheap. Levi gives them a talisman to protect themselves with, Lucifer says cool, but once this is over I’m gonna beat your ass :) Levi says he just bought a new game that lets you create your own story and he just wanted to play it with them :(

So they end up in a cute lil’ game village & beel wants to go to a tavern but lucifer says they need to buy equipment first. If MC asks a NPC they just repeat the same line about how great life is under levi’s rule over and over again, if they search in the grass they find some medicinal herbs but beel immediately eats them, if they break a barrel Solomon starts breaking open barrels too and they get yelled at by lucifer. They end up in No. 2’s armoury. Lucifer’s fed up with life. Solomon says the gear looks like shit and Beel says it makes sense since this is only the first town. When Beel tries to ask 2 for food he repeats his introductory dialogue over and over again. With the money they have they’re able to buy gear for Solomon and MC and the only thing that fits Lucifer is the fairy outfit,,,, I’m NOT fucking wearing that says lucifer off screen and God I love this lesson. Solomon and MC are both little shits and can you just imagine them trying to convince lucifer to wear it just to test it out? Fucking amazing. MC tries to haggle/talk with 2 so they could get armour for beel but he says buddy I’m running a business here BUT there’s a monster in the casino that cheats ppl of their mone– Lucifer & Beel simultaneously: Oh, Mammon. So basically, if they can get 2’s money back he’ll offer them a huge discount on the lord of flies armour.  They decide to find an inn for the night before they face Mammon.

Lucifer finds it hard to eat food. Solomon: Cause you’re tiny ^.^   Beel: Wonder whose fault that is :I  MC can either offer to cut it for him (He thanks MC and tells them to feed him too. Entitled Fuck. Solomon & Beel also want to be fed but Lucifer tells them to fuck off) or tell him to just open wide and take a bite (Lucifer says if he gets too close to the food Beel would probably accidentally eat him). Beel says the food is a lot like devildom food and MC asks him if he likes devildom food or human food, Beel says all food is good. Since they don’t have much money MC & beel and Solomon & Lucifer end up sharing beds with Lucifer telling Solomon to use a spell to keep himself still during the night to avoid accidentally killing lucifer in his sleep. There isn’t a spell for that. At night, Beel asks lucifer if he thinks Satan still hates him and gets “…” in response. Assuming Lucifer is asleep he asks MC what they think. MC says they think Satan just can’t admit that he likes Lucifer. Beel says if that’s what they think then it’s okay cause he just wants Satan to love lucifer like the rest of them do. MC asks Beel if he’s worried about lucifer (Beel says Lucifer wouldn’t want him to worry but… and that he wants to be there when lucifer needs help) or says that Beel really loves Lucifer (Beel happily agrees that he does). Beel then tells MC about how he and Lucifer first met: So back when Beel was an angel, according to him the only thing good about him was that he was strong so he decided to become a soldier except he couldn’t control his strength and always ended up breaking things which led to Raphael always saying something sarcastic to him. The whole thing was depressing for him until one day lucifer came over, sat beside him and talked with him. Lucifer was always really busy and spent most of his days deep inside the palace (places where Beel has never even been to before). He told beel that a soldier was not about attacking but instead about protecting, that protecting was what was most important. He’d told beel that he was special cause he had the power to protect everyone and keep them safe (this shit is the sweetest and it has me sobbing but also that must have hit like a bullet when Lilith died…). Lucifer had told Beel if he learnt to control his powers then Lucifer would recommend him as a Cherubim, gatekeeper. Lucifer had given Beel confidence and his post as a gatekeeper. Which is why Beel wants to protect him, cause he loves and respects Lucifer. He says all his brothers love Lucifer cause if they didn’t they never would have considered leaving the celestial realm. He says that even though Satan’s situation is different he isn’t the same as he was before MC came around and that Beel likes the new satan better. And that he actually likes all his brothers more since MC came around, which is why he likes MC so much too. MC gets to either kiss, hug or thank him. Beel says his powers are there so that he can protect both Lucifer and MC. And FUCK I love this backstory so much????? And I desperately need all the other backstories?

[chandelier-s-notebook]

@the-only-gamer-gost‘s WritingTober Day 4: SleepyBoisInc

Set in @moonbowphobia‘s Heist Au. @octopus-defence-squad is also a creator of the Canon.

--------------------------------------

There was once a little boy, whose real name has been long since forgotten. He wishes. It would have been if he wasn’t forced to go to school. He’s out of school now, but that’s not when this series of events is set.

- - -

When he was nine he started stealing, borrowing, and bartering is way through life. He was a thief and a bandit. And a good one at that.

They called him Technoblade.

As the tales go: he was a one man show. He worked alone. He accomplished impossible heists. Too complex for only one person. But he managed. And he never got caught.

He was wicked good with anything that had circuit boards. And pray for the poor fool who got in to close quarters with him and forgot how good he was with that switchblade of his.

But that’s not truth. In truth, there were two boys in on the shenanigans.

Phil was Technoblade’s right-hand man. He was the one doing the backdooring. All Techno does is put in a chip, giving Phil access.

Funny how the bandit’s nickname is the part he doesn’t do.

- - -

Phil and Techno met in the first grade. Isn’t funny how he’s lost his birth name in his best friend’s mind? Phil had taken a liking to him immediately. Taking him under his wing. Making sure he was good.

Phil neverminded how much Techno stayed over at his place. He was astounded by the state of the orphanage his mate called home. And not the good kind. So was it a surprise when he didn’t bat when his friend ran away from that place?

If there was one good thing about their negligence, it was that they never unenrolled Techno from school.

- - -

Techno started his life of crime when they were in the fourth grade. His little nine year old stature helping him slip away from the scene.

He started to come to school less frequently. Phil started to worry.

It took three months for Phil it figure it out. It took him two weeks to realize that he couldn’t stop his friend. It took another three before he helped Techno plan his next heist.

Phil was the information guy. He pickpocketed the things Techno would need for things to go smoothly. Security badges, IDs, paperwork, a company laptop. He also made sure Techno had all the tools he’d need.

And he made sure that his mate got his school work when he stopped attending regularly. Made sure he knew when the tests were.

While in grade school, Techno did a lot of little jobs often. As they got into highschool he started to do bigger jobs less and less frequently.

- - -

Phil went to college. Technoblade lost his guy in the shadows. He still had his friend.

He had started to feel safe with Phil. A form of insurance. It was always nice to have someone on your side. So he stopped doing jobs.

He enrolled in college after a gap year with the money from that successful bank heist in tenth grade.

- - -

Phil became a middle school teacher straight out of college at twenty-four.

In his second year of teaching he had a familiar looking kid in his eighth grade class.

Thomas Gold. Why did he look familiar?

It wasn’t unless parent-teacher night, when his older brother came in that Phil made the connection.

Wilbur. Wilbur Gold. That kid that got Techno to come to school once a week, if only for the morning for half a year. He had a little brother. This little kindergartener who endeared himself to Techno when they were in the eighth grade was now a highschool senior.

But he needed to be professional. He couldn’t tell this kid that they had met before.

- - -

From then on he has a soft spot for Tommy and his best friend Tubbo. Even if he shouldn’t have favourites. Even if Tommy is a pain. Even if all the teachers agree that he is a bad influence on good kid Tubbo. Even though Phil knows that Tubbo is just better at hiding his chaos.

- - -

As a teacher, Phil has eyes on the back of his head and ears in the walls. But he pays special attention to these two boys.

For the other students safety. He tells himself. I’m not even lying to myself anymore. He ushers the class out of the sciene lab that Tommy and Tubbo have just filled with gas.

So he hears everything. Especially when he’s in the middle of a lesson and people are being quiet.

“So how do we get Technoblade to help us?”

Phil gets whiplash from out fast his head snapped to their conversation. Bitch. TF. Techno hasn’t been active for six years at this point.

Oh shit. Are these two the kids that have started painting the town red? Is Wilbur helping them?

--------------------------------------

Thx for reading. I hope you enjoyed. I have another little story below the cut if you feel like reading more. :)

--------------------------------------

[Enter Techno and Phil’s eighth grade teacher]

Pete was just about done with this boy only coming to class on test days and never anytime else, but who was passing every subject with flying colours. He just didn’t know what to do with him. He needed to talk to the kid’s parents.

He requested Techno’s guardian information. He called the orphanage listed and found that they hadn’t seen him in years at that point. And didn’t even lift a finger to do anything about that.

And this kid had to gall to show up after school the next day asking about that proposed interview with his ‘parents’. We wasn’t even in class that day!

Pete sat the boy down. “I don’t want to talk about your grades. I don’t need to talk about your grades. You get top marks. What I want to talk about is your attendance.”

“Attendance doesn’t affect your ability to pass until high school,” he fired back.

“But not going to school is a bad habit to create. High school is next year.”

“If I work now and save every penny, I’ll have enough money to sustain all the lost hours to school.”

“I,” Pete looked this kid up and down, noticing the heavy bags under his eyes. “We’ll get back to that.”

“Sure.”

“I want you to pass. You’re a smart kid. And it would be awful if you had to do this again. But your final mark isn’t all tests. It’s also participation, and homework.”

“I thought as much.” Then this kid. This damned kid. He opened his bag and pulled out a stack of paper. “Here’s all the homework from the school year so far.”

The school year was halfway done.

“I can hand in things I’ll miss on the days I come in.”

“Lord”

“If it makes you feel better I got eight hours of sleep last night. And I have nothing up my sleeves for participation.”

Pete makes an offer, “Group project.”

“No.”

“Reading buddies.”

“I don’t do children.

“You are a child.”

“I know.”

“Well you need to pick the lesser of two evils.”

The kid tilled his head. “How old?”

“The kindergarteners. Thursday mornings. Starting tomorrow.”

He mulled it over. “Fine, but if there’s no test I’m ditching.”

“I wouldn’t expect anymore from my best student.” Pete extends his arm for the kid to shake. “I’m keeping you to this promise.”

“Give me a nice kid?”

“Done.”

They both sat back in their chairs. Satisfied.

“Was there anything else Sir?”

“You know where I live?”

“Of course.”

Pete handed the boy ‘And Then There Were None’ by Agatha Christie. “You have the work packet for this.

“Yeah.” He turned the book over in his hands. “You handed it two weeks ago. I was going to the library this afternoon.”

“I want that book report on my desk Friday.”

“Home desk? Because you’re implying home desk right now.”

“I know.”

“Why can’t I give it to you tomorrow?”

“While I’m sure it’ll be done by then. Friday. Home desk.”

“Yes Sir.”

- - -

The boy walked into class the next morning.

Pete realized how much the other’s equated his presence with frantic last minute studying. He saw there terrified faces.

Pete hadn’t said anything about a test? Was there a pop quiz? How did he know? Why was he here?

But those were all forgotten about when Pete lead them down to the kindergarten room. He had given the boy the nicest kid, according the their teacher.

He didn’t even address the child. He took the biggest book from the shelf and started to read this giant animal encyclopedia to this child.

The soft brown haired boy was very immersed. He flipped right to the back of the book and made his buddie read about whales.

As soon as the hour was up, and Pete called time, he was out. He put the book away. Saying nothing to his buddies. And walked out the room, and presumably the building.

Pete had never seen a group of students so relieved to see the favouritism of letting a student ditch.

- - -

When Pete entered his house Friday afternoon, he was only mildly surprise to see his student on his couch watching his TV.

“You staying for dinner?”

“I thought that’s what you were implying when you told me I couldn’t hand it in yesterday.”

Pete left him to the TV.

~ ~ ~

When the next Thursday rolled around, he didn’t know who was more surprised when Techno showed up.

Him or Phil.

- - -

But Wilbur was sure happy to see his buddie after he left so abruptly last time.