#how to people

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

I just spent the last ten minutes talking to someone over at the DHHS office. They're responsible for SNAP, Elderly and People With Disabilities programs, and various other state and federal assistance things. I'm Disabled and have had to talk to them a lot.

Yesterday I received a rather terrifying letter that was very uninformative, so I called the scheduling office. They set up a phone call for today, which has been super helpful.

My husband was present to provide information, but was clearly sitting in the edge of panic. Everything has been cleared up, info updated and corrected, and they apologized for the poorly worded letter. All is well.

Bubby has just told me he will forever be impressed with how well I'm able to talk to people. He loses patience and goes into panic because he's very Worst Case Scenario about things. So I shared my secret on how I'm able to do this:

When dealing with someone who is rude, speak to then as though they're a five-year-old child.

When dealing with someone who has a difficult job, speak kindly. They will very much appreciate this and will work with you more willingly.

Smile. They can hear it in your voice.

Breathe deeply and speak with your whole mouth. No mumbling. Annunciation helps a lot and makes your voice clearer.

I'm autistic and have ADHD. This has resulted in me explaining and over-explaining. If I feel I might be doing too much, I pause, apologize, and explain why. 90% of the time it results in a chuckle and a big thank you, sometimes with a sigh of relief.

I have audio processing disorder. Few are familiar with this condition, so I tell them straight away I'm Hard-of-Hearing and will likely need things repeated. What frustration they may be feeling is set aside and they speak more clearly.

If the call is more than 10 minutes, offer a pun. If I can hear they're frustrated, I offer them the option of a chuckle. It has never failed to make them laugh. They relax and treat me like a person again.

I worked retail and as a cashier for years: busy and very popular restaurant, a grocery store on several city bus routes, office store, department stores, a toy store during holiday shopping season, just to name a few. I also worked as a vendor at a Midwest pagan convention (did that annually) for several years.

Speaking on the phone is extremely stressful, but practice helps. Bubby never fails to be impressed though.

Seriously, puns are fucking gold. I bring a few when I have dr visits because hospital staff are overworked, underpaid, and exhausted. Making them laugh has never failed to improve a visit.

[donna-wants-to-be-an-alien]

The horrible clunkiness of my socialising:

"Oh, I'm really interested in talking to you, acquaintance I've met at this public event, but you mentioned a few times you wanted to leave, but then we have another topic, but I feel like I need to tell you that you don't need to stay with me out of politeness, you can leave, but now I told you that 3 times because I'm afraid I'm annoying you, so I also don't want to get rid of you, I like talking to you, also I have a chair and you've been standing for half an hour, please sit down, oh yeah, you wanna leave, okay, bye, oh but new subject!"

Now they've left, and I hope to god I did not misinterpreted the situation and annoyed someone half to death

[cardhouseinapapertown]

[soulvomit]

Placeholder about "we're all a litte [x]" and how there's a thing in normie culture of saying fluff and fuller to indicate non-hostility (for example, the habit of saying "I understand" in trying to make empathy noises at people, but you really don't at all understand.)

And the point is to on the one hand not actually indicate non acceptance (by normie standards) while not having to actually engage on the topic, because actually engaging the topic is actually some kind of social third rail. It's a conflict minimizer, though it rarely fills that function well except in spaces where [x] is outnumbered by normies. Another Normie would get the message to accept the empathy noises and shut up about the topic.

And a ton of the empathy noises aren't really about actually displaying true empathy or understanding as much as they are about displaying that you know the rules and can be counted on to keep them, without ever speaking the rules openly, which would break the rules.

[koobiie]

shoutout to everyone who wants to infodump but cant string together coherent thoughts to form sentences and instead just look at you like this

[eruditetyro]

good morning let’s hear it for Mildly Cool Outside a round of applause for Mildly Cool Outside

[mayhemchicken-artblog]

in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off

EDIT: reblogs are STAYING OFF. op was right and correct and i have never regretted making a post as much as this one. if you want to reblog my art you can reblog something else from my blog. or commission me, lord knows i deserve financial compensation for the nightmare this post has put me through

[stimmingandstruggling]

more good news from tiktok: they’ve started blocking celebrities.

they’re calling it block party 2024. just blocking and ignoring countless celebrities who havent said shit about palestine. influencers, actors, anyone who went to the met gala, whatever, they’re getting blocked. and people keep talking about how cathartic it is, how good it feels, how they never realized they could DO that. there was some kind of subconscious law against blocking famous people, but it’s broken, and people are LOVING it. and it’s WORKING. a social media/digital advertising coordinator was talking about how ad companies are PANICKING, because they can’t accurately target anymore. so many big influencers, including fucking LIZZO started talking about palestine the MOMENT their follower counts started going down. and the best part? no one is forgiving them. lizzo posted a tiktok asking people to donate to palestinian families, and all the comments just said you’re a multimillionaire. put your money where your mouth is. blocked.

i feel like i’m witnessing the downfall of celebrity culture, right here right now. people are waking up.

[cloud-ya]

outcast of the village

[machine-saint]

look at this wacky thing the google AI results just showed me!

[necromimetics]

can’t stop thinking about my friend’s cishet partner who said last night that he doesn’t think anyone is the same gender. god-tier take.

[some-pers0n]

I hate how people will look at popular indie artists who had one or two songs go viral on TikTok and start making fun of anybody who listens to them. "Oh you listen to Lemon Demon, Will Wood, Jack Stauber, Glass Animals, and Mother Mother? Tsk, don't you know that is stupid TikTok neurodivergent white transmasc preteen music? It's so mid and bad you should listen to real music–" you are a pit of misery

[aropride]

i think weight loss ads should be illegal and im not kidding

[lazylittledragon]

can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024

[s-lycopersicum]

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