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my313 · 7 months

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after hours ˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ choi beomgyu

(18+ MDNI PLEEEASEEEE!!!)

now playing 𝄞₊ ⊹ apple cider - beabadoobee & paradise - chase atlantic

⋆ pairing: fwb!beomgyu x afab!reader

⋆ summary: you and beomgyu have a very loose definition of being friends. repeated hookups under the guise of last minute 'hangouts' was one thing, but when those flaky plans turn into sleepovers and morning afters, are you still really 'friends'?

⋆ genre/themes/warnings: smut, hurt/comfort-ish, fluff, non-idol au, fwb to lovers, implied stoner!gyu, drunk!reader, reader wears makeup, switch!beomgyu, switch!reader, possessiveness, name-calling, degradation (slut, manwhore, fuckhole), praise (sweet boy, pretty girl, pretty boy), reader calls beomgyu’s (nonexistent) hoes bitches lol, dacryphilia, oral (m & f rec.), fingering, hair pulling, a lot of slapping??, dumbification, semi-public sex, unprotected sex ++ lmk if i missed anything!

⋆ word count: 7.1k

a/n: dont ask idk how i ended up writing it this long.... but EEEEE its here :D this is my entry for @junniieesbby and @boba-beom's tubatu bday event !!! also idk what possessed me while writing the smut part... dunno how to feel abt it tbh since its been a while so im rusty but we move!!! enjoy hehe

you can pinpoint exactly when beomgyu was just another boy who lounged on your bed for too long after a few rounds of sex, to a boy who managed to sleepover and learn how you had your cereal in the morning. before the copious amount of last-minute text messages and half-assed ‘hangouts’ that always led to tearful eyes and sore bodies, beomgyu could be loosely classified as a friend. an arm’s distance away, but both of you never bothered to reach out. not until it was for weed, and now, sex and whatever fucked up idea of friendship you both had. surely, friends didn’t hold hands, kiss, and help with one another’s groceries, right?

speak of the devil. you’re pulled away from your thoughts when you feel beomgyu tug on the sleeve of your sweater – the one he always spent an extra minute snuggling into before stripping you off of it, the only reason you wear it so often – dragging you ever-so-slightly into his personal space. he insists on putting your head on his chest, perching his chin on your head and letting his hands guide themselves to the dips of your hips and waist. you can tell he smoked before having you over from the scent peeking out between the spritz of perfume you bought him for christmas. it’s evident in the way he’s melting into you, ready to shut his eyes and drift off with you in his arms.

“what’s got you using all your brain power?” he asked, voice muffled from pressing a kiss to the back of your head. you hope he doesn’t notice the way your breath hitches when you feel the warmth of his lips. you wish you could just mildly enjoy the fluttering feeling within you, but rather than a light buzz, it felt like an anchor situated in your chest. you’re too proud to admit that beomgyu’s the reason why. you’re too afraid to think that yeah, i do like him that much.

you’re quiet for too long, so beomgyu pushes his nose further into your hair, his lips brushing against your scalp when he mumbles sleepily. “did you change your shampoo? what happened to the apple one?” he pauses before moving away from the back of your head. instead, he opts to rest his face between your neck and shoulder. “i like this one too, though. it smells like punch. it makes me wanna eat your hair…”

“ew. please don’t,” you can’t help but laugh, cheeks still pink from having to hear beomgyu’s soft murmurs about the most miniscule details like your shampoo. “how did you even notice, gyu?” he lifts his head, donning an offended expression. “what do you mean? do you think that little of me, babe?”

even the most ridiculous of his outbursts couldn’t distract you from the way he called you babe. you shake your head and roll your eyes, “this one was just the one on sale, babe.”

it was beomgyu’s turn to blush. hearing you say it back makes him evidently more shy, and the heat radiating off both your bodies sticking together only makes him even redder. “hey, only i have the babe privileges, babe.”

“and who let you have those privileges, choi beomgyu?” you raise a brow comically. bantering with beomgyu almost always ended with you both sprawled over any surface you’re on, bellies hurting from uncontrollable fits of laughter. “haven’t even taken me out on a date and you’re calling me babe? what happened to hey, how are you?”

“you gave me head in an alley, i dunno if that really applies to us anymore.” it’s obvious from his half-smug grin that he’s proud of his joke, earning a harsh slap on his forearm as you both are consumed by giggles and smiles. “shut up, i was drunk!”

beomgyu’s room is dark, only dimly-lit by the projection of howl’s moving castle on the blank wall. you might never know that he only bought that projector to have you in his room for reasons other than sex. he may never know that you didn’t need all that convincing anyway.

when the laughter dies down, the mood diverges from being silly to somewhat solemn. beomgyu’s stare is intense, contrasted by the soft smile tugging at his lips. the yellowy hue of the projector makes him look like a character from a ghibli movie, even without the shagginess of his long, auburn hair. he looks like almost princely with his short black hair.

“did you.. want me to take you on a date though?” he’s hesitant to pry open this conversation. it’s one you both have spent the last few months avoiding in spite of all the things you’ve already started feeling. you avert your gaze away from his, too all-consuming to stare right into. you’re afraid you’ll cave if you look at him any longer than a second. “i mean…” you trail off.

every passing second seems like forever for beomgyu, attempting to appear nonchalant to not scare you off, but he falters when you can’t even look his way. was he reading this all wrong? dejectedly, he tries to reel back his words as some form of damage control.

“wait, sorry if that made you uncomfortable. we’re friends, it’s okay, you don’t have to answer.” he says in a panicky voice. this whole ordeal is sobering him up. “and i’m sorry i called you babe. especially if you don’t like it.”

seeing beomgyu visibly deflate only hurts you more, wincing inwardly at your throbbing chest. you’re stunned, overwhelmed by the glimpse of a tough conversation. you don’t pull away, but you’re not moving any closer either; it makes beomgyu feel like he’s in the middle of a field in a snowstorm, grim and desolate. when your thoughts drift uncontrollably, your tongue doesn’t catch up fast enough to clear the air and comfort beomgyu.

you take too long to say anything again. beomgyu notices how you fidget with the hem of your shirt, taking the loose thread between your fingers to ease your anxiety. even though his heart sinking, he pushes the thought to the back of his mind and settles for a quiet, “let’s just sleep, okay?”

he doesn’t give you a chance to pull yourself out of this well you’ve let yourself stumble into. not even a nod or a protest to his anticlimactic resolution to this dilemma. you’re met with the solid color of your (well, his now, you think) pink hoodie when you rest your head on his pillows. his adequately wide shoulders suddenly look so small, like he was curling into himself to be apart from you. you decide against doing the same; a hasty attempt of pulling him back down from wherever he was drifting to. you feel him tense when you drape your limbs over his, head safely tucked behind his back. beomgyu is hyper aware of how your chapped lips prickle against his nape, and he can definitely feel your breath when you let out a subdued apology.

˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹

the next time you see beomgyu, you can actually barely see him. the strobe lights shift from purple to orange, thick smoke floating in every crevice of the club. this is the first time in a while that you’ve gone out without him. usually, you’re both fishing for shots and him pushing you to some unassuming guy for a free drink that he can mooch off of too. it’s funny, until you start thinking about how he doesn’t even consider you as a potential romantic prospect to easily hand you onto another person.

you’re not sure if tonight would follow the same routine. ever since that night at beomgyu’s, he’s only bothered to reply to your texts dryly. you figure he’s not upset enough to ghost you, but he’s definitely not in the state to come over to bake cookies – and he’s definitely not in the mood to fuck your brains out.

you block out the noise with another shot, coupled with restless thoughts reminiscing on your conversation with beomgyu. he almost seemed disappointed that you didn’t leap at the chance of a date; did he maybe expect you to say yes? you’re tempted to pull out your phone and ring him in the middle of the club. your eyes aimlessly scan the place, but one person is unmissable, even in your tipsy state. choi beomgyu was in this overcrowded shoebox.

it only takes a few stumbled strides towards the seating booth before you’re right in-front of a dumbfounded beomgyu. his eyes are glossed over and red, sitting next to a very drunk yeonjun. he doesn’t really know what to do, but thankfully, he’s saved from thinking of his next steps. you beat him to it with your grand gesture of throwing yourself on his lap and embracing him, arms wrapped around his neck. your face is warm against his collarbone, the sniffles you let out only continuing to make him feverish. it doesn’t help that he can feel your tears wetting the collar of his shirt.

“gyu…” you mewl. he doesn’t know if it’s the cross-fadedness, but the heat goes straight to his groin as you cry out. “why– why didn’t you text me to hangout at all?” you’re hiccuping at this point, brows knitted while you practically bounce on beomgyu’s lap from frustration. the friction makes him grimace, clenching his jaw and swallowing in restraint. he can’t even throw his head back because your face is glued between his neck and shoulder. he’s blushing at your uncharacteristically impulsive moves, and even more so from all the attention his friends have on you both. he’s not sure if he likes this many eyes on you, now that he can see yeonjun’s ditzy eyes flicker to something sneaky and taehyun’s restless ogling.

beomgyu’s hands have been hovering over your body since you’ve made yourself comfortable on him. he’s unsure if he should really be letting himself touch you; as if making contact with your sweltering skin would break his already poor resolve, but the unwarranted looks from his friends are enough to make him cave to his desires. his fingers grip the bit of skin between your shorts and your crop top, squeezing slightly. it takes him everything to stop right at the hem of your shirt, tempted to sneak the pads of his fingers under to reach for your tits.

“y/n, let’s get up, okay?” he tries to persuade you, prying your arms off and trying to stand up from the booth seat. he’s met with your whiny protests, “n-no… you can’t leave!”

“i’m not– i’m really not leaving!” he says defensively. beomgyu finally manages to get you off his lap, half-hard cock making an appearance. he picks up his jacket to cover up quickly, but as he rises to his feet, you plop yourself on the sticky club floors and hug his leg. you’re more so oblivious to the rising boner he has just above your head, the roughness of his jeans against your soft cheek comfort you in a way, and beomgyu can’t deny that it’s adorable. he feels his heart twinge. this is the first time he’s heard your voice in a week, and he’d do anything to fix things up. even if he has to forget what happened.

he downs another shot as if preparing for some battle, then crouches down to your level. he hooks his hands under your arms to get you off the ground, your hands finally by your side and not a random body part of his. “let’s go home. just sleep at mine.” he half-heartedly waves goodbye to his friends.

you trail behind him like a stray cat. the only thing keeping you from swaying away is your grip on his index finger, wrapped around your hand. beomgyu leads you away from the seating booths, tries to maneuver swiftly through the sweaty crowds, but he makes a stop when he hears your voice.

“i don’t wanna go yet, gyu.”

“what? be serious. you’re gonna throw up in, like, ten minutes tops..” he turns back to you, opting to circle his hand around your wrist instead of your flimsy clutches.

“i’m serious!” your attempts of convincing him seem to be entering one ear and leaving the other, so you decide to grab his hand instead and drag him in a familiar direction. “h-hey– hey! the taxi rank is the other way–”

˚ ༘`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹

both of you end up between the back of the club and a random warehouse; the beloved alleyway that you and beomgyu have defiled many, many times. outside the dim lights of the club, beomgyu can take a closer look at your face. your mascara has run to your undereyes just a tad bit, and the way you’re sitting on the pavement while he’s leaning back against the brick wall reminds him too much of the times he had you at his beck and call. your knees are pressed to your chest, giving him the perfect view of the underside of your thighs. he’s hell-bent on being serious, but the back of your head calls for a good push onto his clothed cock. he’s thankful you’re too busy staring at the ground to notice his perverted stare, and importantly, the tent in his pants that’s been throbbing since you decided to prance towards him.

“i think i like you too much.” you blurt out, not making any eye contact with the person you’re confessing to. beomgyu’s eyes are blown out, dumbfounded for the second time tonight – what do you mean, you like him too much? in the same way he liked you too much? the same kind of ‘too much’ that’s made him voluntarily fuck up his sleep schedule for the past few months? his thoughts are all jumbled up at the possibility of having you all to himself forever, overtaken by the swelling in his chest as you look the shyest he’s ever seen you. something about having you like this; a sight just for him makes beomgyu’s heart flutter.

“okay, we can go home now..!” you laugh awkwardly and get off the ground, still averting beomgyu’s stare. you don’t even know how baffled he looks, brows upturned and lips parted like he’s just been let into a secret cult with all the knowledge of the universe. that’s how severe your unexpected confession has malfunctioned him. you’re about to call an uber, but you can’t move your arm from behind, finding beomgyu latching onto you. it’s enough strength to have you stumble back into his chest, and he’s quick to turn you around.

“wait, wait, again.” he’s a few inches away from your face as he speaks in a hushed tone. at first, his hands were stationary, laid by his side. once you start stuttering, looking away from him and mumbling a bunch of ums and nos, he holds your face, caressing your cheek delicately and making sure you have no escape from his eyes. “look at me when you say it. please, again, for me..?” he pleads, weaponizing those damn puppy eyes he knows always work their charm on you. in fact, he has many weapons up his sleeve to the point you believe you just have a soft spot (everywhere, basically) for this boy.

“you’re such a brat, gyu.” you joke around, rolling your eyes.

he shakes his head, eyes unwavering and holding your own captive. he looks like he could cry; the kind of cry you love to see when he gets too drunk on you. “no, i just want you to give me the chance to say it back. properly. i’ve been waiting for ages,”

“can you please let me?”

you’re folding immediately. you can’t even process the fact that he basically already confessed back to you in the same breath. beomgyu really knows when to use the right words and how to use them against you. “i– i like you,” you admit, bashful for the second time. “more than a friend. or whatever it is we are.”

“and i like you too,” beomgyu smiles fondly, rubbing his thumb over your lip and toying with the flesh. he doesn’t think of how that makes your pulse quicken, or how it makes your knees buckle just a little but not enough for him to notice. “too much. maybe more than you do, actually…”

hearing him say it out loud brings some of your liveliness back. just enough to return the favor and push his buttons, taking in his thumb and sucking on it briefly, letting it go with a popping sound. “you can’t confess back to me without making it a competition, huh?” your teasing breaks beomgyu out of his lovesick gaze, something a tad darker looming over his features.

“don’t be so cocky. you were just hugging my leg and crying like a baby half an hour ago.” he retaliates, eyes clouded with arrogance. beomgyu closes the distance between you two and takes the liberty of lifting his thumb from your lip to place it on your cheekbones. he chuckles at the way your face follows his hand from the withdrawal, only to relax into his touch again. you’re about to whine at him for removing his finger. instead, you feel his lips on yours, light and airy as your hands find their way back to his nape. it’s been so long since you kissed him, an odd sense of relief fills your senses when you can taste his strawberry lip balm – the same one he stole from you ages ago and seemingly can’t stop using. you don’t know it’s because he always misses the way you taste; your strawberry lip balm just a stand-in for when your lips are too busy to press against his.

it doesn’t take long for beomgyu to go in for the kill; the airiness of your kiss dissipating as quick as it came. instead, your kiss turns sloppy and both his hands engulf your face as if you’re going to run away if he doesn’t hold you tight enough. his grip on your jaw allows him to pull your face closer, deepening the kiss. your hands go to the place they’re most familiar with, tangled in his hair. when you feel him playfully take your bottom lip between his teeth, you whimper at the sensation and tug at his hair, trying to pull away but beomgyu isn’t one to let you go so easily.

the two of you are stumbling backwards until beomgyu hits his back against the brick wall again. he can’t pull himself away from you, settling his thigh between your legs and letting you grind against his jeans while pushing your head deeper. it takes a moment for him to recollect himself and disconnect from you, a string of saliva forming as you part. when he glances back up at you, chest heaving up and down, he admires the way you look dizzy and utterly overtaken by want. even when you try to look up at him as you circle your arms around his neck again, your eyes are unfocused.

beomgyu isn’t any better, though. he looks at you like he wants to devour every last bit of your body; his hands act faster than his mind can think and roughly pulls you by the hair. with your head pulled back and neck exposed for the taking, beomgyu latches his lips onto you hungrily, leaving marks as he goes. he catches the way you swallow when he moves his lips; the way you whimper and hitch your breath while dumbly rutting onto his jeans.

your lips curve into a frown when you feel the cold air on your neck, incoherent noises making it hard for beomgyu, who’s pulling away, to keep his dwindling composure.

“wanna prove if you really like me more than i like you?” he challenges. you’re in no state to disagree; wanting something – anything, to happen. beomgyu already knows that, so when you eagerly nod, he has the same arrogant half-smile on his face as he does when you meet at this alley.

he retracts from between your legs and pulls at your hair again, “you know where i like you best, right?”

that’s all it takes for you to drop down to your knees, beomgyu’s grasp on your head easing as you take your position beneath him. you peer up at him as your fingers work the zipper of his jeans, like a pet waiting for permission to go further. beomgyu silently nods, prompting you to undo his jeans fully and pull them down to his thighs. you’re salivating before you even pull his heavy cock out of his underwear, tempted to tease and kiss through the fabric, but beomgyu’s seething grip on your head and impatient stare has you shuffling fast. his cock is finally exposed to the chilly air – only for a few seconds though; he’s quick to use his hands in your hair to push your face closer.

you spit on his cock, licking the underside before pressing kisses on the tip. slowly, you take him into your mouth, eyes looking up at him and being met with an approving nod. beomgyu has his own eyes fixed on your every move; the tight hold he had on your hair traded in for gentle caresses and pats on your head as you familiarize yourself with his thickness.

“so pretty for me, baby.” he murmurs, relishing in your glossy eyes and smudged makeup. “keep going, i know you can do it. how are you gonna prove me wrong, hm?” beomgyu’s asking too many teasing questions, especially when he wants to coax you into his hold; the softness of his hands on your head a sharp contrast from the pace he’s thrusting into your mouth, eager to watch you gag.

your brows knit together from his hot-and-cold teasing, determined to take his cock down your throat and prove yourself right, even if deep down, you know it’s pointless to take on his challenges. you grumble as you take more of his length in and he’s breathless above you, lowly groaning and instinctively shoving your head onto him without warning. “f-fuck,” his roughness makes you squeak, the vibrations in your throat has him fucking into your mouth violently. you nearly topple over, hands tightly gripping his thighs to balance yourself.

beomgyu’s hands grip any strands of your hair he can touch, his hips doing most of the work. “fuck– take it, t-take it..! such a good fuckhole for me.” his eyes are still open, albeit half-lidded and dazed, simply to watch how you go from drunk and whiny, to drooling and crying on his dick. his pace has gotten much less controlled and more so messy, feeling his cock twitch on your tongue has you whimpering through it all.

“hah–” beomgyu’s hold on your head pushes you against his pelvis as he stills, stomach buckling when he feels the back of your throat. “love your throat, made for me to use, baby..!” he’s obsessed with how your throat tightens and gargles nastily, wanting to jerk away but unable to, firm grip on your head; pliant and unmoving like a toy at his disposal, save for the way your doe-eyed gaze has succumbed to closing as tears crease the makeup on your cheeks.

beomgyu doesn’t take it lightly that you take your eyes off of him, so he pulls himself out of your mouth. the loss of him has you snapping your eyes wide open, coughing and whining. he responds with his wet cock slapping your face, your saliva smearing across your visage. he does it once. twice. you anticipate the familiar impact on your tear-stained cheek for a third time, but you feel something much harsher.

his palm pitilessly strikes your cheek before taking your face between his hands and squishing your cheeks together, lips forced into a pout. he takes the chance to tap the tip of his cock on your lips, mixing your drool and his pre-cum over your patchy lipstick, a sinister laugh echoing in the eerie quiet of the alley. “i don’t remember saying you could look away, slut.”

“m’sorry–” he doesn’t let you finish. beomgyu strokes himself as if you’re not right below his cock, mocking you. “that’s okay baby,” his head cocked to the side, staring down at you underneath his length almost condescendingly. the power trip it gives him is a complete disparity to his doting stare; he looks at you like you’re the most important thing in his life but cradles your face like you’re a mere puppet. you’re confused by the deceptive gentleness in his voice, especially when he looked like he was about to fuck your throat wide open out of spite just a few moments ago.

you really shouldn’t let your guard down when beomgyu’s feeling insatiable.

“get up and show me that perfect pussy, yeah?”

you’ve given beomgyu head plenty of times outside the confines of your rooms, but you’ve never had sex anywhere else, especially since you both tend to like staying in. “everything okay, baby?” he lets go of your face, your cheeks imprinted with red marks where his fingers just were. you look back up at him, snapping out of your daze when he checks in on you. you nod back immediately, “mhm, i’m good.”

“we can always go back home if you’re not comfy here.” he helps you up, grabbing onto one of the hands resting on his thigh to balance you, wobbling as you rise from your knees. you look at him and smile softly at beomgyu’s thoughtfulness, “baby, i’m fine.” you pull your hand away from him to unbutton your jean shorts, letting the article of clothing fall to the ground and stepping out of it. you take one of beomgyu’s hands and guide it to your clothed cunt, letting his fingers stroke the wetness as a sign of your consent. “gonna touch me more?” you taunt him, slightly bucking against the hand cupping your pussy.

he doesn’t respond, heavy breaths as he retracts his hand and switches your positions; your chest is pressed against the wall while beomgyu crouches down, face-to-face with your ass. his eyes flicker up at you, a menacing grin is proudly on display as you turn your head to look back at his antics. “gyu–” you’re cut off by a loud smack on your ass, squealing from the impact. “mhmf–! keep touching me, please.”

beomgyu hastily pulls your panties down in response, fingers gathering your slick and fondling your clit with a light-hand. he makes an effort to pull away when your hips move on their own, chasing his feathery touches for even an inkling of friction. you turn back sharply, scowling at the shit-eating smirk that you’ve fallen victim to countless times. “if the slut has something to say, say it, baby.” you whine at him in protest, “m’not a slut–” he stands back to his full height, leaking cock touching the bare skin of your backside. “aren’t you though?” he circles around your folds to let you hear the wetness, “so drenched from having my cock down your throat. only dumb sluts get off to that shit. did you miss my cock that much?”

the hand teasing your clit suddenly slaps your pussy, and he doesn’t miss how you clench around nothing, thighs tensing from the sharp sensation. he’s amused, doing it a few more times when he realizes how sensitive you are to every spank. each time his palm firmly meets your cunt, you sound even more fucked out. he grows a fixation on the little noises that involuntarily come out of you, admiring how sublime you look with your mouth agape and lids threatening to shut at every touch. he presses himself against you, chin on your shoulder and teeth nipping at your ear. “come on, pretty girl, where’d you go? haven’t gotten to use this sweet pussy yet.”

he moves away from your clit and finally inserts two fingers into your leaking hole, indulging in the hushed moan that follows as he moves expertly. beomgyu knows every crevice of your body like he’s studied it from a textbook day and night, taking him less than a few minutes to find the spot that serves as a dumbed out button every time he fucks you with his slender fingers. when his digits curl into your walls, terrorizing you as he repeatedly thrusts his fingers, your whimpers progressively turn into loud bawling. your body practically melts back into him, back flat on his chest and head thrown back on his shoulder.

he knows he’s got you where he wants; brainless and amounting to nothing but a doll. he can’t help but coo at your helpless state, suckling a trail of kisses on your jaw. “so fucking cute, fuck–can never get enough of you, baby. want you like this all the time, just for me. all mine, right? you’d let me have you forever?” you know he’s just as gone as you are, his rambles giving it away. still, you nod frantically. “just for you, gyu. only for you to use and keep. forever.” he can’t help but let out a satisfied groan at how quick you agree, trying to find purchase from mindlessly rutting between your thighs.

the music from the club is faint, practically background noise to your wails, beomgyu’s grunts, and the popping wetness each time he plugs in and out of your hole. one particular thrust has you clenching, alerting beomgyu even in his desperation. he takes this as a cue to speed up, drawing out a pitchy squeal from you, “i-i’m cumming– fuck, beomgyu–”

you’re out of this world tonight, beomgyu concludes; his mind numbing from being so turned on from the way you chant thank yous like a prayer to the way your eyes deliciously roll to the back of your head while you ride out your high, hips moving wildly on his fingers. when you’re nearing the end of your orgasm, beomgyu pulls his fingers out, sucking off the remnants of your release. you’re too distracted from the feeling that you don’t realize beomgyu crouching down, spreading your cheeks to peek at your swollen cunt. “w-what are you doing, gyu?” you get your answer in the form of his tongue prodding at your hole, lapping at your cum heartily. “w-wait, too much! too much!”

beomgyu is never one to listen, especially in this foggy state of doing anything he can to see you fall apart over and over. knowing only he can do this eggs him on even more. his tongue continues to fuck into your hole, meeting him in the middle by unconsciously grinding into his mouth. beomgyu’s raspy grunts have been traded in for mindless moans, deep from his adam’s apple as he eats you out until you’re cumming a second time. your frame visibly shivers, as if a current of electricity is shocking your every limb. he detaches his face from you, lips gleaming with your slick, the most loopy smile on his face – like he’d just come back from the candy store or won the lottery (he thinks he has with you, anyway).

sobering up from your orgasm has you seeing red at beomgyu’s devilish smirk. you turn around, facing beomgyu scornfully. this time, your hands reach out for his hair and yank him up. “you’ve been such a fucking brat.” you hiss at him, unimpressed by how there’s not a sliver of regret or fear on his face; rather, he appears to be basking in the glory of making your knees buckle even whilst scolding him. you pull at his hair again, “i could leave you right here without making you cum. would you want that, baby?”

“i don’t think your stupid cock agrees, hm?” you let go of his head, but you don’t give him a break. beomgyu shivers at your hand wrapping around his cock, thumb toying with the angry tip. it takes everything in him not to buck into your fist, knowing damn well he’s going to make a mess the minute he feels even a shred of friction. “the stupid cock that made you fall in love with me?” he masks his weakness with typical jabs, even with his bare cock out and your cum dripping down your thighs.

you won’t let him fluster you, convincing yourself the heat rising in your cheeks is from the chill and not from how he echoes your affection for him. “shut up, fuckin’ manwhore.” your hands tighten around his length, jerking him off faster than you were a few moments ago. “bet you said that to all your other bitches. you’re so..!” your brows are furrowed in frustration, not really knowing where this underlying jealousy is coming from, or how it’s fueling your drive.

it gives beomgyu whiplash – you’re never usually this mean to him when you try to dom, but he’s not complaining. he’s getting off on how upset you seem to be, letting himself thrust into your hands, disgustingly wet noises filling the air. “am i right?” you probe, tone laced in half-spite and half-anxiety. he throws his head back with a groan, unable to answer clearly, “n-no, it was always you. just for you. you’re the only one baby, fuck–” hearing the first half of his sentence has you squeezing his shaft again, drinking up beomgyu’s wanton moans. “promise?” he nods feverishly, eager to run after the hand stroking his shaft. to his dismay, you retract your hand. “don’t– why’d you stop?”

“thought you wanted to use me, beomie?” you smile coyly. beomgyu swears the world stops after you utter the hottest thing possible; even more than your attempt at catty scowls and mean words. he leaps at the chance you’ve generously given him, instantly taking your head between his hands to crash into your lips, a passionately silent thank you in beomgyu language.

there’s no prelude to beomgyu’s actions. even if he initially wanted to take his time and zap your brain back to mush, he physically can’t deny how much he needed to bury himself inside you. your giggles chime like an all too familiar melody once beomgyu’s tip sinks into your folds, slippery and lost from his impulse-driven desperation. a whine escapes his lips, eyes watering from the hint of euphoria he experiences when being enveloped by you. you caress his head gently, purring praises, “it’s okay, sweet boy. c’mon, been waiting for your cock all night.”

“w-wait, just take this.” he slips his jacket off his shoulders and pushes it towards you. even under a teary daze, beomgyu thinks about how your back might hurt from pressing against the roughness of the brick walls. you smile gratefully, taking his jacket and pulling through the sleeves.

beomgyu returns to his original stance, lightly tapping your thighs, signaling you to wrap your legs around his waist. you comply, complete with your arms hooked behind his neck, forehead pressed against his and eyes scanning his weeping face like you’re trying to photograph how he looks at this very moment. this is the same face that has plagued your mind for the past year; the face that has a smile that brings the sun to shame; the face of the boy that has somehow managed to squeeze himself into your life unexpectedly.

“so pretty. my pretty boy.” you whisper to beomgyu, letting your thoughts express themselves through a chaste kiss, just shy of his lips.

beomgyu takes this chance to calm his swelling heart, shutting his eyes as your lips feather against his. the only things his mind can process is the way your voice dips lovingly as you call him pretty; how you peer up at him with blown out pupils when you do. despite having you countless times, some in places more dignified than now, he thinks he’ll remember this as the start of a new beginning with you – even if he’s fucking you in some dingy alley. at least he can call it your dingy alley. he finally pushes the tip into your cunt with a breathy whine, “you’re so warm, fuck, m’going insane.” after a week of no beomgyu and being too sad about your lack of beomgyu, your pussy takes a bit more time to adjust to his girth, shuddering from both the stretch and the pleasure of having him stuff you again.

“k-keep going, doing so good for me,” he heeds your request, pushing into you until he’s sure you’ve taken in all of his cock. “missed you so much, gyu, you don’t even know.” beomgyu pulls out then snaps himself back into your walls, picking up his pace slowly, different from the rush he felt earlier. “m-missed you too, hah..” his palms are leaving marks on your body as he pulls you into him, wanting to hit into you even deeper. the bulge that forms in your stomach doesn’t go unnoticed since your bodies are mushed too close to one another. beomgyu’s stomach feels it first, driving his thrusts to quicken and mouth to start a never-ending string of babbles. “mine, mine, mine. this pussy’s mine, right? gonna let your pretty boy fill you up?”

“mhm!” you appease his mindless rambling by nodding along, head thrown back on the wall. “wanna see it drip off me later. can you do that for me, gyu?” that definitely eggs beomgyu on, because you feel his dick twitch inside you. he has this determined look on his face as he shoves into you, face scrunched up and bottom lip caught between his teeth, making you arch your back off the wall. you’re still sensitive from the two orgasms he brought you to prior, making your core tighten at beomgyu’s inhumane tempo.

“thank you, thank you, thank you–” he’s chanting, much like how you were when you were bent over, being finger fucked. you think beomgyu looks much prettier, though; his eyes glisten under the flickering streetlight, lips parted with his tongue peeking out, unable to ignore how his breathing has become so uneven. you laugh, “baby’s so close? you sound like a bitch in heat.” beomgyu cranes his neck downward, leaning his sweat-slicked forehead on your shoulder. “m’not..! just– you feel too good.”

“yeah? how good?” you move your head closer, warm breath tickling his neck while you nuzzle into his shoulder as he did to you. beomgyu doesn’t say anything; his sobs speak for themselves. “i asked you something, baby. where’s my sweet boy?” he whimpers at your calling, like a pet being whistled at by their owner. “h-here. so hot, you’re so hot, just wanna cum inside you so bad, baby. i’m– i’m so close! gonna cum!”

the knot in your stomach pulses even more with beomgyu’s mouthy tendencies. you may never admit to him just how much his voice and senseless chatter account to your orgasms, pushing you to the edge every single time he starts to get close. that’s when his lips loosen the most, blabbing about anything he can think of. much like right now; listening to every dip, note, and curve of his faltering voice has your legs shaking, finally falling apart on beomgyu’s cock.

when his hips stutter from your tightening walls, the only words he can say are “l-love you so much, y/n. i love you so so bad.” his sloppy movements have stilled, burying his nose into your neck, breathing in a mix of your sweat as his cum spills inside. you’re both panting, a broken gasp escaping your throat in the midst of beomgyu’s crazed humping, concentrated on fucking as much of his cum back into you. he only stops when you tug on his hair and make him look up at you.

“we need to go home at some point, gyu.” you deadpan, still lifted against the wall and enveloped in his sweaty embrace. despite the frosty air nipping at every bit of your exposed skin, you want to shrug off his jacket from how stuffy it’s become; your face heating up from a culmination of beomgyu’s i love you and his warmth sticking to your skin.

beomgyu takes a few more minutes to snap out of it, eventually pulling out and watching white drip down your inner thighs. you unlock yourself from his body, wobbly on your feet as you pick up your shorts on the floor and dress yourself, beomgyu mirroring your actions.

“you didn’t say it back yet.” lips pouted in a sulky tone, completely different from the beomgyu you carelessly pulled away from his friends, and much more akin to the one panting out of urgency.

“did you mean it?” genuine curiosity weaved in the way you ask him. a part of you, unsure and horrified of this being a vivid fantasy, still can’t believe it. “i– i don’t mean to doubt you, or question you-” beomgyu cuts you off with a peck on your lips, another on your tear-stained cheek, and a final kiss on your forehead. “i meant it, and i meant it when i said there’s only you.”

he averts your eyes when he says this, bashful even if it’s not the most outrageous thing he’s said tonight. “to be honest, i stopped seeing other people a few months after we started fucking.”

“what? since when?” you gape. “you were always bragging about your roster! what the fuck?” although you sound upset, your cheeky smile screamed how overjoyed and satisfied you were. “when you came over and played a league match on my pc..” his head is low, forehead flush against your collarbone.

“damn,” his embarrassment has you cackling. through the fits of laughter, you feel beomgyu’s shy smile against your collarbone, voice small as he defends himself. “stop… just to humble you, you were really bad. i just thought about how i would die happy if i saw you on my desk chair everyday.”

beomgyu finally lifts his head to look at you dead in the eyes. “you’re so romantic, beoms. i didn’t know you had it in you!” you tease, overcome with some form of cuteness aggression that has you pulling at his cheek. your fingers stay there, toying with the flesh. “i love you too.”

“i know,” he replies confidently, tongue peeking out of his mouth. you pull at his cheek harder, his face moving along to the side with a yelp. beomgyu places his own hand over your own, bringing your hand down between you both. he tightly clasps your hands together, locked between the gaps of your fingers like puzzle pieces. he looks like a fool in love (he is); goofy smile making his cheeks swell up that his normally wide eyes turn into crescents. “should we go home then, girlfriend?”

#from.313 #313.hardhours #beomgyu x reader #choi beomgyu x reader #beomgyu x you #beomgyu x y/n #beomgyu hard thoughts #beomgyu hard hours #beomgyu smut #txt beomgyu smut #txt beomgyu x reader #txt x reader #txt imagines #txt smut #txt hard thoughts #txt hard hours #txt scenarios #kpop smut #313.beomgyu

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grazhir · 2 years

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Subnautica

Found the duo on sale (Black Friday) so I've been playing the original while waiting on updates to Sandrock and Planet Crafter.

Played it for quite some time (survival mode) before inevitably checking the mods section of Nexus (and some GitHub repositories).

It's … frustrating?

The map mod I grabbed really helps! I can use my PDA to check where the hell I've been, what wrecks I've stumbled over.

I still don't get the hull integrity thing. I don't really understand what the numbers mean in the end. Okay, so now I have this multi-room base (with a moonpool, since I found the fragments and materials for that and a seamoth), and it started sprouting leaks all willy nilly.

Got it repaired after far too long of running from room to room repairing leaks (the interface there isn't all that helpful, honestly). Then I started adding hull plates, only to find that I couldn't put them in any number of places, because I'd already attached lockers to those "walls".

Right, whatever.

[This just means at some point I start a new game and do a base with those things in mind from the beginning.]

But now I have over 200 HI, and I have no idea what that means because…? Got leaks again, though only two, and quickly repaired.

Is this fauna bashing into the walls doing it? I'm at the landing spot, just a little ways to the side and under enough that I can fit in more than one level if I stack the multi-compartment pieces.

Stairs were a trick to figure out, since I can only seem to place them from above when it comes to those, but from below if it's a hallway piece? I dunno. Or maybe I'm remembering wrong on the latter.

Not happy that platforms don't have ladders on the sides. I can't place one on the surface for non-water crops, because I have no way to get up there, not unless I place it next to the landing pod and jump over, and you can't place a ladder (that I've noticed) because those are inside things. This irks me. Inside it is, then, which means more compartments and weakening hull integrity.

I do have outside ones on an underwater platform, though.

The game itself is terrifying in some ways. The sounds? Holy fuck. It's almost like I can hear someone speaking to me (and I do have enough vague spoiler knowledge that…), and that weird laugh sound. Eeeee!

I have all the prawn pieces, but not all of the cyclops ones. Did find the two islands (quarantine enforcement and Degassi/Rally point), and placed beacons above the quickest entrance to the Jellyshroom cave, and one down on that level. It's way too easy to get confused down there, even with the compass chip.

For now I'll stick with the seamoth. Though I am embarrassed to say that I unfortunately got my first one stuck when I pulled up to the Aurora. I can't shake it loose and it's not like the propulsion cannon can pick it up so I can back it off that ledge? Yeah, had to build a second one.

Lesson learned.

[And good thing the Aurora has multiple fire extinguishers on it, because I only brought one, and it ran out.]

Thankfully I hadn't found what I needed to craft and include a depth module yet, so it's fine, just embarrassing.

Still missing alien containment, quite a few upgrades for the cyclops (if I should ever be able to make one).

The big beasties are terrifying, and the crash fish jump scare me every freakin' time.

I also managed to go much too far looking for a crashed pod (with no marker) and ended up in a dead zone with a mess of leviathans. Very scary, fled like crazy mad.

I'm a little too used to Planet Crafter and how compartments fit together.

#subnautica

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deklo · 3 years

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i had never been as burnt out as i was last fall/winter when i was about to graduate and now i miss school so much i could Cry

#like i was confused today about WHY i didn’t go straight into grad school after my undergrad #and then i had to remind myself that i was exhausted and anxious and depressed constantly lol #the pandemic probably didn’t help but #i love fall semester so much i love when it gets dark early and i have a 7-10pm night class !!!!!#i miss being in campus!!!!#i also just miss learning EEEEE #im so sad but also im full time at work now so i don’t think i can just go back to school if it’s not for my masters lol #anyways #i miss school lol hehe

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dangermousie · 3 years

Photo

I love this scene so much! And yet, empathy is his strong point and also in retrospect, his homecoming is a different kind of brutal, eventually - he’s changed so much he cannot fit in.

I really do like PK Tech Girl ep. Random thoughts:

How telling to see that this John automatically tries to protect Gilina (from being shot at, from Aeryn’s interrogation etc). I don’t think it’s entirely the fact that she is a pretty girl, or even the fact that this John is yet unscarred enough to offer complete kindness to a total stranger. I am especially thinking of it in context of Aeryn’s interrogation where Aeryn barks at her and there is a definite bit of humiliation going on. John cannot bear that. Even later John cannot. Ever. Even when he is very very dark and hardened, even when it’s his worst enemy. Just look at the Arnessk eps, when Grayza presents him with twitching, drooling Scorpius on a leash. Crichton would kill Scorpius if he could, without a second thought, but utter helpless humiliation cuts a little too close to the bone, is a little too familiar, for him to ever feel comfortable dealing it to others. (Side note: How in keeping with the concept of the dark universe that neither Scorpius, nor Scarrans, nor Grayza are defeated, humiliated, destroyed, punished. They have to compromise somewhat but largely get what they want. Especially Scorpius.) My favorite moment of this whole ep? The conversation Aeryn and John have in one of the dark corridors. It’s the shipper in me. Aeryn is clearly annoyed at finding John and Gilina snuggling (and I love how Crichton thinks it’s general PK grumpiness and maybe comment on work ethic, but for Aeryn that is mixed in with jealousy.) And Crichton wants to explain himself to her (I love that he finds it important to do so, even though at this point in time they are in no way anywhere in the same Universe as a couple. He does view her as important, as a friend) and he asks her if she’s ever just clicked with anyone, just found them attractive. And she pauses and hems and haws and then blurts out “Yes, but I didn't let it....in the beginning I found you...interesting.” And I just love the look on Crichton’s face. He is completely stunned, completely surprised. And I think I love him a little more for that, that it didn’t even occur to him that someone like Aeryn could find him more than a nuisance. It’s clear he was attracted to her earlier but I think it’s after this that he feels (subconsciously) that it can be less sublimated. That there is a possibility, however farfetched. I just love how he asks “Me?” and she replies “Yes, but only for a moment.” And I love how he is sort of still reeling from it. And then he tells her it’s good to be on even terms and I realize that he is admitting, however obliquely, that he was attracted to her too. EEEEE! I do find it interesting that this Crichton is also learning, toughening. He automatically jumps to protect Gilina when Aeryn and D’Argo start firing but when Aeryn mentions she is from Crais’ ship, he crosses the line and stands with them. But this Crichton still believes in communication solving problems: he tells the truth to Gilina, about his accident, about Aeryn. And it does work. I love the little chatty, bonding moment he has with her when they are working (and I love that she clearly is thinking ‘Cute. And a tech. Scooooore!’’) He just misses being equals, having a relaxed fun chat.

#farscape

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shintorikhazumi · 3 years

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Two is company, Three's a Crowd, but Four is the Death of Diana Cavendish (3): Progress

A/N: Okie, here it is, my dear catalyst friend who caused this fic to exist in a sense hahahha @tanuki-pyon. This fic is... idk.

Also I’m assuming that @komatsuna-yuki wants to be tagged? still? idk? sorry for assuming????? also @dianacavendishisgay just to tell you the next is here.

To everyone else,

Enjoy?

~Shintori Khazumi

Hannah sipped loudly from her cup, eyes bored, but inwardly absolutely amused as she watched Diana's mechanically stiff movements. The girl could not go into her classroom any slower.

Diana had been having difficulty entering the room; the thought of meeting Atsuko so soon- after that weird chain of events they had sprung on her- was daunting.

Yet Hannah wanted to see to it that Diana would attend her next class. She was waiting for her to go in already before walking over to her own a few rooms down.

She would not- could not- let Diana get away and lessen their chances of capturing one Kagari Atsuko.

Oh, the thought of that girl sent a jolt of excitement up Hannah's spine. The things they could do to the adorable, almost puppy-like bean once they were together.

Ah, but Diana Cavendish was so hell-bent on patience, chivalry, and her century-old idea of 'courtship' that would probably leave them all dried out by the time they got to the first date. It was a little annoying.

It simply wouldn't do.

That's why Hannah and Barbara were here. After noticing their lovely girlfriend struggle the past few months or so with hidden feelings that they could not interpret as anything else than the beginnings of another love, they had decided that it wasn't so bad to help her out and give her the happiness she very clearly deserved.

Okay, and maybe they found Atsuko super cute. After observing her the past few weeks- just to be sure she was good for Diana because scouting was important if they wanted what was best for her- they had come to also adore the honest, bubbly, and incredibly sweet girl who went to the park after school to feed random birds and animals, and gave children sweets after performing rather impressive magic tricks.

Hannah sighed her thoughts away, turning back to her useless girlfriend to confirm that she had made no progress at all in getting to her class. As expected.

Hannah could only watch on helplessly. She was not about to ruin her pretty image by barbarically dragging her girlfriend into the room. Not yet. That was only for desperate times.

Now was... not so desperate.

After what felt like forever congested into the last ten minutes of Diana's- and by extension, Hannah's- struggle, the oaf of a blonde genius finally managed to take a step into the lecture hall.

-only to peek back out at a speed contrasting the time it took to enter the room.

Hannah simply raised a brow, a silent, "What." being expressed.

"She's not here yet!" Diana whisper-shouted in panic. "I should've remembered she'd usually not be early! She's never here early! Hannah!"

Hannah only took another sip from her straw still, rolling her eyes at her girlfriend's rare display of desperate whininess.

Such a baby sometimes. She was definitely going to tell aunt Bernadette when they met up again. Just so they could tease Diana together.

"Calm down, sweet. Just go wait for her inside then or something." Hannah finally responded, sipping the last of her iced coffee before tossing the empty container into a nearby bin. "It's not like she'd skip class to avoid you."

"..."

"No way." Hannah could have laughed as Diana silently confirmed that Kagari Atsuko would definitely do something like that.

Oh great.

Two pains to deal with now.

She should've asked Barbara to come along.

Suddenly she heard a squeak from behind her. Hannah quickly turned around and a grin formed immediately on her face.

'Well, well. How perfect.'

Just the one they had been looking for, who was about to turn around and leave- about to bolt for dear life.

Not like Hannah would let her.

Preparing her sweetest smile and voice, she called the girl's name, skipping in her direction, snaking an arm around her waist before planting a greeting kiss on her cheek.

"Atsuko~"

"EEEEE-! M-Miss England!"

"Oh, come on. Don't be so cold now! Call me Hannah~. Han-nah. <3"

From the corner of her eye she could see Diana sporting a scowl.

'Oh? Already jealous?'

It only tempted Hannah to mess with the pair even more. This was actually turning out to be quite fun. Maybe patience really was a virtue worth its price.

"Come now, let's get to class." She cheerfully linked arms with Atsuko, dragging her into the biochemistry class, past a Diana whose jaw hung slack.

----

Diana snapped out of her stupor soon enough, marching after the pair into the room.

"Wait a second, Hannah." Diana glared at her girlfriend, noting that Hannah had stolen her seat next to Miss Kagari. She nudged the girl over, the three of them now sat- squeezed together- at one table usually meant for only two. "You don't have this class." She pointed out bitterly, hoping Hannah would take the hint and leave.

Her frown deepened as Hannah simply smirked that one way that Diana knew meant that Hannah would do as she pleased regardless of anything or anyone.

"I do now~."

Lunch.

Finally. Thank god, Diana thought.

...or not.

If her morning dedicated to labs was already difficult with Hannah hanging around, Barbara taking a seat next to Miss Kagari at the table doubled her hardships.

Really. Couldn't these two see that they were making her cru- frien... wait. That wasn't it either. Just what... was Kagari Atsuko to her at the moment then?

She glanced at the trio again, her girlfriends taking turns happily feeding the poor girl in the middle who could only smile and nod, afraid of rejecting their advances.

She should really learn to speak up, that Kagari Atsuko.

Then again, she couldn't blame her. This was something she had also experienced back then, when she first started dating Hannah and Barbara.

Diana sighed, not really knowing what to do anymore.

"Yieee-!"

Diana swiftly became alert, already up from her seat and walking over to where Miss Kagari was bright red and apologizing to the people around for disturbing the peaceful lunch hours with her noise.

Diana was toeing a very fine line of patience, having been tested all morning. Hannah and Barbara were going too far with their touchiness and teasing! Hadn't they discussed that they'd go into this gently! Courtship! Kagari Atsuko deserved the best of it!

This wasn't it!

And Hannah slipping her hand onto Akko's thigh was the last straw for Diana.

Quickly, she took that hand off, taking Akko's and leading her out towards the courtyard to get some fresh air. For Akko or for herself? She didn't really know.

In her blind emotion, Diana had failed to realize some things. One was that she had dragged her partner half way across the school building, subconsciously wanting to be as far from her stressors as possible; and two, they were now alone. Something that never happened outside of lab activities.

As soon as it came to her awareness, she whirled around to face the girl she had roughly tugged along behind her, bowing in deep apology. "I'm truly sorry, Miss Kagari!" She hadn't really thought of what to do after that.

Peeking up at Akko, she saw a flustered expression that made her heart flutter in her chest. Everything about her was just so, so enticing. Maybe she'd admit to understanding her girlfriends' desires to act the way they did around the Japanese girl.

Caught in a moment unaware, her lips loosened, speaking a blaring thought she had believed she'd suppressed at the back of her mind for so long.

"May I formally court you?"

She felt her eyes widen as Akko's did as well.

There. She'd said it. She'd finally said it.

She just hoped that Akko would let her down easy if in case rejection was her choice of answer-

"H-how... How does it work?" Was the tiny voice's response in the form of a question of her own.

"Huh?"

"This... thing. Relationship. Of yours." She wrung her shirt in her hands, twisting nervously. She didn't seem to be asking out of judgment, rather it was out of genuine curiosity. "I mean... if I'm going to-to be a part of it, I'd like to know... y'know?" She grinned this crooked silly grin that made Diana blush.

'Super cute' -as Hannah had put it, Akko was.

"W-well... I... um..." Come now, Diana Cavendish. Where did the valedictorian of her graduating class go? She needed to explain it clearly, and simple as possible at the same time. "It's... we love each other... equally...?"

'Oh, bury me alive.'

"I... see." Atsuko hummed, staring at her shoes for a bit, face scrunched up in deep thought.

Diana needed to do something. Say something to clear up any confusion the other girl might have acquired after her failure of an explanation.

"Y-You don't have to erm... 'love' as all at once. Or force yourself to be in a relationship with us all- um... odd as it may sound... that you'd date only one of us while we date each other. Oh but... That... doesn't sound very fair on your part, does it?" Diana chuckled awkwardly, one of her hands circling the opposite wrist, seeking comfort in the sensation.

Aahhh, she'd definitely messed it up now. Maybe having Hannah and Barbara around was a better game plan when it came to Kagari Atsuko. Diana braced herself for the worst.

The worst... didn't come.

"I want to try."

If anything, it was the best?

"W-whu?" Diana's gaze zoned in on the blushing woman in front of her, shoes scuffing the dirt, hands fidgeting together. She was clearly flustered. Not that Diana was any better. Especially not after the bomb that would drop on her next.

"I actually... like you... Miss Cavendish."

"Well, shit."

"Eh?"

"Oh! Oh no! Shit as in... no, um...not in the bad sense! Shit as in, the good shit- dear lord, what have I been spouting I'll shut up right away, right now, I- I'm..." Shamefully stupid as she was being, she couldn't help the smile that was beginning to make her cheeks hurt by how wide it had spread across her face. "I'm so happy, Mi-Miss Ka... no.... Atsuko. Atsuko... At-canIcallyouthat?”

She received a dumbfounded nod. One she was most grateful for.

She took a deep breath. “I... I also... I fancy you." She confessed in her own odd way that definitely confused Atsuko.

"Thanks?"

"It means I like you."

"Oh."

"..."

"Oh."

Diana couldn’t quite name all the emotions that had so quickly flashed across Atsuko’s face. She hoped they meant good things?

"Well, shit."

Good things.

"Right?" Diana began chuckling, unable to help herself. She felt over the moon, flying high up like a witch on a broom above the clouds. Or was Atsuko the witch? Casting a spell on her, making her all sorts of weird.

Did it matter now though?

Hardly.

If anything, she liked this love spell that had bewitched her.

"May I... May I walk you home after class later?" She mustered up the courage to ask, patting herself on the back for being rather progressive. She was feeling a bit more confident compared to earlier. Her composure was beginning to return to her, and her calm indicated that she was getting used to interacting with her new potential lover.

And then the girl smiled.

All of that organization of mind flew out the window.

"I'd love to walk home with you, D-Diana."

Ah. The finishing blow.

"Th-th-th-th-that's! Sounds perfect! Ha! Haha! Ha...ha... I, then we should-" Diana should remember how breathing felt. Suddenly, her head was spinning, vision tunneling. She vaguely heard the lunch bell go off somewhere in the background. "Class! Class, time to go back and-"

She missed the way Atsuko's eyes widened in panic, looking behind Diana and reaching for naught.

"Eh? D-Diana, wait! There's a-"

Tree.

Before she could even think of kissing Atsuko, she first kissed a tree.

Progress.

//-//

Extra:

"You think it worked?"

"Obviously. My plans always work."

"Our plans, babe." Barbara giggled, leaning her head against Hannah's shoulder, relishing in its warmth and comfort. It was fun to tease the pair while it lasted, but she couldn't help but wonder if it was all okay. "We didn't... push too far, did we? Make them uncomfortable or anything?"

Hannah nuzzled the top of her head, planting a kiss there. "I'm pretty sure we did." She sighed. "But would it have been as effective if we didn't?"

"I suppose not."

"Mm." Hannah hummed. "We can just apologize when this is all over and laugh it off."

Barbara turned to her, giggling, a teasing glint in her eyes. "You hate apologizing, luv."

"I know." Hannah laughed along. "That's why I'm hoping it goes great and Diana forgets all about it."

Barbara agreed with that one. She knew she was equally in trouble.

They hoped for the best. If all went according to their little scheme, Diana would be coming back with a girl that was already half their girlfriend. Just a little more to go. Then they could get to all the 'fun things' that came with being in a relationship.

Right.

Still though...

"They're rather useless."

"No truer words have been spoken."

#lwa #Little Witch Academia #diakko #hanbaradiakko #hanbara #hannako #barbara x akko #whatever their ship name is #diana x hannah x barbara x akko #diana cavendish #kagari atsuko #Barbara Parker #hannah england

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d-nghy-ck · 3 years

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say 5 nice things about your moots!!!!!! A twist on the trend going around right now 🥺

This is so sweet!!! Thank you for giving me the opportunity to gush over those I love, anon!! I seriously covet these people so much. You guys really brighten up my days, and I really hope I can provide joy for you, too <3

Confessions under the cut!

Mads | @neonun-au - Mads, you’re so exuberant, funny, uninhibited, bouncy, interesting, and creative... Endlessly inviting to be around and so open to discussing any topic (though assertive and unafraid to provide your real viewpoint!) Refreshing, honest, and very fluid-minded, in the sense that you meander around your thoughts and shift to and fro in a very conversational manner and I love it!! Listening to your thoughts is like taking a trek down a bustling town square with no destination in mind, because it’s all about finding gems and precious moments along the journey. Talking to you is such a joy. I’m so thankful that I can go to you about anything <3 And I like being there for you, too! I’ll always be here to listen and laugh or contemplate and get those gears going. You’ve added a little bit of joviality that was missing from my life, filled in a space that needed a bit more silliness, and for that I am SO thankful! You live life like it’s worth living and have such a free, explorative spirit that I find inspiring and uplifting. Keep being you!!! You’re so great!!

Cee | @nctsworld - Cee!!! I’m really, really thankful to have your company! Somehow you’re simultaneously both carefree and on top of your game, ready for action and prepared to do whatever it takes to achieve your goals, whether it’s writing a series or setting up a game night. Highly functional human being for sure. I feel so comfortable approaching you about any topic, and it might be thanks to us having so much in common or perhaps just because you’re so approachable and sweet, and also a bit silly (love love love!!). You’re always down for a good time and you never fail to bring the good vibes!! Not to mention, you’re so confident and think your aspirations into actuality and that is so powerful!

Sasha | @neocitycafe - Ah Sasha, there’s something about you where your soul is so beautifully delicate and whole that when you bring up topics that subvert those expectations, I can’t help but be entranced ahahaha! Know what I mean? It’s like the effect of thoughtful, sweet sweet Mark cursing hahaha. Speaking of thoughtful, you’re such a deep thinker and have really meditative, emotionally aware, human qualities to you. I really dig it!! We can go from having a deep talk about the kpop industry to gushing over sleepy groggy boyfriend Sunday morning looks. And also, I adore your unabashed admiration of cute things and how you really embrace it aaaaah, speaking of which, I think I might go ask how the employees are doing at your cafe eeeee!

Nikki | @jaemxxi - Ahhh Nikki, you are so great!! You always put your best efforts forward and look out for your friends, and doing so takes a lot of strength. I’m really proud of you <3 You’re realistic, kind, honest, and grounded. You always find good in people, but also know when to take care of yourself, too. It’s a really mature mindset. You value very sound morals and focus on meaningful qualities both in those around you and the characters you create. You know your worth and always seek to incorporate things that build you into a better person, even if it involves changing habits and pursuing alternate endeavors.... A strong asset of yours is your ability for growth and adaptability while also staying true to heart. I love you Nikkiiii, in all of your candid thoughts, in all of your quiet moments, in all of your wonders and epiphanies!

Jackie | @hchan-main - My person <3. My soulmate <3. Loving you is so easy. We can conquer anything we put our minds to, whether it’s creating a network, learning new skills, providing the best emotional support possible, or just having a very light, hilarious conversation djfhagsk I love you so much!!! Even when I’m tired, when I feel hopeless, when I’m downtrodden and crying, you are the safe home I can crawl to for a moment of recovery. Just knowing you’re there is enough. Just you existing as you are is all I need. With all of your encouragement and support, you’ve helped me grow into a better, stronger person, and that part of you will be with me forever. You’ve shown me how deep love can feel, and all of the care you’ve put into treating me kindly is indicative of the absolute angel that you are. But at the same time, you’re worth more than what you can do for others. Seriously, you’re so selfless and nurturing. Be sure to take care of yourself, too!! Take care of my Jackie for me, I love her a lot and she only deserves warmth and happiness, nothing less. Yes I did just cry a little.

#sorry this took a while to answer <3 #i have another one of these so i will make myself stick to five people in this one <3 #asks

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popculturebuffet · 4 years

Text

Amphibia Reviews: The Sleepover to End All Sleepovers/A Day at the Aquarium

Last full episode before hiatus! The Kids have a sleepover in the castle that starts like the Princess Diaries 2 and ends in unspeakable horror, while the Plantars try to spend one final day together without getting sad. Sort of like everyone these days without the final part. One last ride under the cut.

Whelp it’s the end for this batch of episodes which is sad, and i’ll genuinely miss covering these every week. Yeah I have other coverage incoming with Ducktales coming back, eeeee, and current Loud House coverage.. but it was still nice to have something to cover this summer and something to watch every week during this blighted year, as i’ve mentioned before there weren’t any BAD episodes just hard to cover ones and I think by the end I figured out how to do that.. mostly by stopping straight up recaps for more condensed ones. Point is I had fun, grew as a reviewer, and it was a good way to kill a few saturdays, sundays and one or two mondays, and that ain’t bad at all. So before we come back for halloween, let’s send off weekly amphibia coverage in style for now, unless it comes back in November and I look stupid, with this week. Let’s go.

The Sleepover to End All Sleepovers

Well this one took a turn. It was also an excellent one as we got more insight into Marcy and Anne’s friendship with Sasha, and some truly excellent horror. Yes, horror. The Plantar kids head to the castle for the evening for a Sleepover. Turns out the king finally did find something, as did Marcy who’s playing coy about what they found in the hidden library I forgot to mention last time because I was covering 4 episodes at once. Anyway King Keith David has a meeting with them tommorow. So the kids are staying with Marcie to have a fun night together while Hop Pop has a night without the kids to get something head to toe.. it’s better not to ask. They also annoy Olivia who goes off to drink.. juice. Yes the hard juice that comes with a lemon wedge and speedoed servant newt.

It’s also our ambigously gay duo’s first sleepover without Sasha, but their confident they can do this themselves while Sprig is hoping i’tll be good as his first sleepover (And has a creepy closeup about formative memories) Cue a fun montage of everryone annoying olivia and getting into hyjinks round the castle from sillys tring, which is shot from critters, to painting moustaches. It’s fun stuff. Then we go from fun stuff to...

As , in order to stay awake, as being the bastion of pleasantness she is Sasha refused to let them sleep till sunrise, Marcy and Anne initate a SCARE DARE! A SCARE DARE! is a scary dare where the person who dosen’t complete it goes in the book of losers. Which of course was Sasha’s idea, both in general concept and the dares done. What a well adjusted young lady! So naturally our heroes go into the basment they were told to stay out of. They get pass Lady Olvia because she’s passed out drunk on hard lemonade, living the dream as it were. ,Anyway they. find a bunch of tombstones, and then Marcy and Anne taking a selfie (Say desecration) wakes the dead... all because they were both playing chicken. One has to imagine how the kids talking with hop pop would go

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So yeah the ghostly horror terrors chase the kids, who somehow end up in Marcy’s room. So she just has a passage from a floating graveyard contaning horrifying eldtirch ghosts to her room.. a room the king put in for her. Someone protect this child.

So our heroes soon have to deal with the ghosts but luckily sprig’s mirror catching it reveals the mirrors, which were foreshadowed earlier by a hall of mirrors leading into the corpse room, making the ghosts solid and allowing our heroes to fight htem back. Our heroes are exausted, Marcy and Anne reveal that they also chickend out on the scare dare so it’s okay, and Oliva arrives. It’s go time. Final Thoughts: A fun episode that quickly pivots into a great and nightmare inducing one perfect for spooky season coming up soon. I do generally wonder just WHAT those things are, and it’s great setup for whatever’s abotu to come. And while I didn’t mention it in the recap we also get sprig finding some sort of painting and it being of the king, a toad and a frog.. we don’t get to see it clearly so it could be someone else.. but.. it’s clear the king likely has ties to what happened before. But what DID happen before? what are those ghost things? what’s the king’s angle?

Yeah I have no answers for now on what the king’s plan is, or how inocent he is or if that’s his dad, just that something’s clearly wrong. And the omonious chess metaphor told us that.. yeah I do think that bit was kind of a mistake as otherwise while we’d probably still question the king, we would be more conflicted as evidence piled up versus “yeah something’s clearly wrong. “ Then again we genuiely don’t know what his motives or plan is or how well intentioned he is or anything other than he SEEMS nice, and that said game could be a necessary evil for all we know. We just don’t have enough information, even with the ominus bits, to truly know what’s going on and what kind of villian the king is. If he is one at all the show could pull a massive swerve on us.. I mean I doubt it he probably is evil, but I wouldn’t put it past the show. For now let’s move on so I can do more wheel spinning and what not...

Day at the Aquarium

So it’s time for another audience with the king. Turns out he and Mar-mar found out a LOT. Or Marcy did at least, as the above makes clear the king may of known ALL OF THIS already, and just needed Marcy and Anne to think he didn’t long enough for his evil plans. But we do learn a LOT about the gems, the box, and what it does as well as how to fix it...

So let’s not waste time since some of you probably don’t have episode acess this early and want to know: Turns out the calamity box is an interdimensional travel device, and, as far as the king tells us anyway, the king’s ancestors went around from world to world as explorers, possibly the group seen in the picture and just as likely the king himself hiding his role in things. Now how much of the explorer part is TRUE remains up in the air, especially since history also painted Columbus an explorer, including when I was in school, and not you know.. an idiot and a colonizing bastard. History is written by the winners after all so it’s hard to know what’s true, only that the book is likely real: While the king COULD’VE planted it to lead marcy, or had one made up, a fake would’ve been spotted immeditly as we’ve established Marcy is a master detective with batman level deductive skills. Or Elongated Man but I wanted most of you to get the refrence and his adaptation versoins so far haven’t been the kindest to ralph. Anyways, point is that con wouldn’t work on her so the book IS real, as is it’s info on the box.. i’ts just hard to tell what was left out or if this was written before utter diastaer and apocalypse insued. After all Gravity Falls Journal 3 is all fine and dandy about bill before the giant passage about bill not being trusted written in blood and Ford going into a paranoid tailspin after realizing his friend is actually a horrifing monster, literally and figuratively, so we don’t know WHAT could’ve been hidden in a nother book the king could’ve removed at any time before Marcy got there or while she was away on a mission. But yeah while we know there’s probably more to it this is sitll big information, the box connecting to 4 other worlds other than amphibia, which not only opens up the story possiblities but the fan fiction, and that each of the gems can be recharged at three temples, each one of the gems responding to a diffrent trait judging by the symbols, each representing our girls; Purple is strength, and thus sasha, Blue is Heart, Anne, and Green is Brains, Marcy. I do like thisd as it tells us more but only raises further questions, hooking the audience more. It’s great stuff. But our heroines now have a goal.. but unforutnately the Plantars need to go back and Anne can’t go with as Marcy wants her close. It’s harvest season soon and the Plantars have been away long enough. So they have one last day, though both marcy and the king are apologetic and the king offers them a large tissue and upon getting no response just gives it to them as next time we see them with it. it’s both a great gag, and a nice show of kindess from the king and possible diabolical mastermind.

So the Plantars decide to spend their final day with Anne at the aquarium, as it always cheered her up. This goes south as eveyrhting from the eels to the giant kraken to the coral reminds them of their past and leaves the poor group sobbing. Even a water show goes sideways as Sprig sees an eel, but it does lead to the group fighting off the stingrays at the show in an utterly stunning fight sequence. Not the best i’ve seen this month.. but only because I binged what I missed of rise of the tmnt this month and that show’s final figh tis an utter showstopper, as are most of it’s fight, but this is easily on par with most of them. Fluid, well done and emotoinal. Our heroes get thrown out of course, but the thought counts and they decide one last throughly them memory is better than nothing. The final scene is naturally an utter gut punch as we get tearfull goodbyes (sprig and anne forever). Their crying, i’m crying we’re all crying and Hop Pop promises they’ll see each other again. Because family always finds each other. My heart.. it’s too full. here have an apporiate song...

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Let’s see how i’m doing.

Yeah so two things: I’m not going to be able to stop sobbing thinking of this scene so let’s move on and how have I only NOW refrenced gilmore girls on this blog?

But yeah the scene is utterly moving as the Plantars leave and Marcy realises something. She likely was keeping Anne close because she just got her back... but realizes she’s being selfish. It’s not SAID on screen but it’s clear both in Hailey’s voice acting and from the animation what’s going through her head. It’s utterly captivating stuff. So she tells Anne to go with them.. offically because they should have someone they can trust keep an eye on the box, which is a good idea honestly given just giving it to a royal messenger is just asking for it to be stolen. So Marcy will stay behind and prepare, and since she mentioned it before likekly try to find Sasha as she earlier stated they HAVE to find her.. and given what we see with the recharging that’s both because she misses her friend no matter what she’s done, and because she’s vitally important, while Anne goes with the Plantars to get the box and have some more time before they say goodbye forever, with Marcy coming to wartwood to pick it and anne up for the first temple. Because nothing terrible’s ever happened when a plucky youth with a sword went to three seperate temples, especially involving a guy with a beard and full plate armor.

Marcy stares off, sad her friend and possible crush is gone.. but unederstanding that this is what she needs, and that she can’t hold her here.. Anne needs to see her family off.. and we get a tearful reunion as Anne chases after them, passing her friends from “Scavenger Hunt”, and reunites with her family. But of course we can’t end on a happy moment, as we cut back to Marcy whose utterly sad.. and the King who says he has a proposition for her, one she’ll find most agreable.

But yeah we end on that bit of ominus as we close till october.

Final Thoughts: Yeah if it wasn’t obvious this was a great one. Great plot progression, great animation, great emotional hook, good jokes which I dind’t get into for time, and tons of stuff to leave fans wanting more just before the break, but without a HUGE cliffhanger. Sure we don’t know what the King’s planning, but that aside our heroes are still together outside of marcy, and we haave a lot to look forward to whenever the show gets back. I’m hyped. Your hyped. IT’s a good note to go out on, especially since last weeks eps were also excellent and it looks like things are about to pick up. When next we meet it’s an inconsequential, probably, anthology episode, though it should be fun, then whenever new episodes return, wether it be just in november or more likely in February, our heroes return to wartwood! And we’ll find out what everyone’s been up to. Hopefully Ivy didn’t leave sprig. We’ll see. Until then, you can check out this blog for more recaps, as I said i’m covering ducktales as it comes back monday and loud house whenever I can get my meat hooks on the new episodes, and until then say safe and go team venture!

#amphibia #recaps #reviews #animation #day at the aquarium #the sleepover to end all sleepovers #marcy wu #king andrais #keith david #Anne Boonchy #hop pop #hopidiah plantar #sprig plantar #polly planatar #lady olivia #disney channel #disney

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princeazurathepathetic · 3 years

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hello miss kya!! how about 3 4 and 5 for the ask game 💕 hope you're having a great day!

EEEEE!! OKAY! Tho these are very hard questions so I'm gonna have a hard time choosing... Also I tried to keep my reasons brief but I think I failed.

NUMBER 1: (what is your favourite black eagles student and why?)

Hmmmm toughie. I'm gonna say Petra. (Ferdinand, Dorothea, and Edie were close seconds tho)

Petra is a phenomenal character and is so smart. She has a consistent way of speaking English that makes her feel more real instead of the usual Pidgeon English bullshit that a lot of characters have. But really I just love her determination to learn as much as she can and turn her own horrible hostage situation into a place of understanding and diplomacy. To better understand Adrestians, and to hopefully find a way to get Brigid out of being a vassal state. She's just- THE BEST. Also she's the hottest Black Eagle. So. You know...

NUMBER 2: (what is your favourite Blue Lions student and why?)

Okay this is definitely gonna be the hardest oh no. BUT I'm gonna have to say Dimitri, Dedue, and Felix. (AHHHHH BUT I LOVE ASHE ANNETTE AND SYLVAIN TOOOOO)

All three of these characters are PHENOMENALLY written! Dimitri is just one of my all time favourite characters in any media ever! He's so week written, his struggle feels so real, the way he responds to his trauma does too! His entire arc obviously had a lot of time, research and care put into writing it. He's also very attractive and he's played by Chris Hackney: God of Voice actors. Dedue is really good too!!! He's super kind and gentle and protective. But he's also completely reliant on Dimitri for his perceived self worth. He's very well written, and you can see how much work he spends stuffing down his trauma (which is very unhealthy) and it really fleshes him out as a character. He's also very attractive, so extra points. My only wish is that he hadn't been sidelined/killed off post timeskip. FELIX is ALSO amazingly written. You can see how his trauma affects him, but how he tries so hard to pretend it doesn't. His relationship with Dimitri is very very well written too. Yes, he's very ableist, but you can still see how his reaction to Dimitri comes out of his own personal trauma (The Western Rebellion). You can also see how much his dumpster fire of a relationship with his father affects him too. Especially in his paralogue and in his supports with Seteth. Also he's very hot, so extra points.

AND FINALLY! NUMBER THREE: (Favourite Golden Deer student and why)

Hmmm... Also a toughie. Probably Claude or Lorenz. (But I live Marianne, Hilda, and Leonie too!!)

Claude is just. Awesome. Really well written. Really interesting character. Really interesting motives. Incredible supports. Really funny. He's just- He's just CLAUDE. I can't even. So I'm just gonna add that he also gets points for being very hot. Lorenz is a really good character BECAUSE of how unlikeable he is pre timeskip. But post timeskip (especially in his supports with Byleth) he really really comes a long way, learning to be less of a dick to everyone, trying to be least misogynistic, being gay for Claude, and he becomes a truly caring individual. Who, admittedly is still way too pleased with himself, but you can really see how far he's come and it makes me cry. Also he's very hot post timeskip so he gets extra points!

I know a lot of these explanations were rushed aha, I just didn't want TOO large of a wall of text, so I tried to keep everything brief :)

ANYWAYS thanks for the ask Lana!!! ILYSM!!! You have my whole heart!!!! 💜💜💜

Link to ask post

#ask game #my opinions #i just realized i find all of the characters i meantioned attractive whoops #thanks for the ask!#fe felix #fe dimitri #fe petra #fe claude #fe dedue #fe lorenz #dedue molinaro #petra macneary #claude von riegan #lorenz hellman gloucester #dimitri alexandre blaiddyd #felix hugo fraldarius #fire emblem #fire emblem three houses

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goodvibesprompttime · 3 years

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EEEEE I adore the second sickly head cannons! ^o^

Thank you for allowing me to be 🍄 !! I love this little blog and cant wait until it blows up! But until then >_>

Maybe some hybrid cannons? Like how Sam is a creeper hybrid, Fundy being a fox/part salmon (no matter how much he denies it) Technos piglin blood, Phil along with Tommy&Wils avian bloodline, Sapnaps blazyness. Ya know just some domestic head cannons, like how they’d relax and unwind, and taking care of their hybrid side?

Hello again my 🍄-y anon! Your words are too kind to me! I don’t think my little corner of tumblr will ever “blow up” - but I like bringing ideas for anyone who sees them!

If you saw someone I didn’t include, or want to see more people on the DSMP, I ill happily make a part 2!

TLDR:

Sam spends his time taking care of stray cats and raccoons(and technically adopted one he named Punk)

Fundy likes baths and honoring his mom

Sapnap just wants a lava bath and to be with his fiancés

Techno likes his hair being played with and to look like the cover of a dark academia novel

Avian bois have different opinions on their wings

Phil is an old man

Wilbur is emotionally detached

Tommy is just trying to take life slow and live that sweet, sweet cottage/goblincore life

When he was younger, Sam was terrified of cats - full phobia, always running away, scared that, even though he’s a hybrid, that the cats sharp claws will pierce his skin too much and cause him to explode. While this won’t kill him, it... hurts....

However, when Sam met Ponk, Ponk introduced him to cats, Sam became less afraid of them, and even takes care of the stray cats(and raccoons) that are around the prison.

Sometimes, when the nights are especially rough, and being alone in the prison is too much to bare, Sam brings in a specific brown and orange stray cat - feeds it, takes care of it, let it get warm. He makes sure its fur isn’t matted, and their claws are clipped(not declawed, thankfully). And when the cat climbs into his arms, purring, Sam finds himself laughing at how he was once afraid of these adorable fluffballs.

BTW - he named the cat Punk.

Fundy takes frequent baths or else his fur gets dry and sometimes falls out, and his skin gets all scratchy and dry, and it’s very uncomfortable. Long baths with bubbles, a dim lighting, and some candles keep Fundy happy and relaxed. And when his thoughts get too loud, he plays music on his little radio.

Fundy also likes going to the sea and collecting seashells. They remind him of his mom, and how, before she, well, passed, she use to make him crowns of seashells, seaweed, and pearls. He also asks, whenever he comes across salmon(both common salmons and the merlings), for stories about his mother - if they knew her. She was a very sweet salmon merling, and Fundy has every story written down. Sometimes he reads them - in bed, in the bath, just by the fire, whenever he wants to feel closer to her.

He also carries around fae spoons (spoons made out of seashells and wiring)

Techno likes when Phil plays with his hair - its comforting, and while Techno isn’t really one for physical touch, he makes the exception for his close friends. When he’s stressed, you can tell cause he takes out his braid and starts messing with his hair. He messes with his hair a lot in prison, mostly cause it comforts him.

Techno does know how to braid too, although Phil’s hair is a little short (only about to his shoulder). Techno, as a hybrid, doesn’t have a lot of needs or demands, he tends to either relax with training or reading.

Don’t ever tell anyone else that he likes sitting by a fireplace, cozying up to Steven and/or Phil while they sleep/read to him. Add some tea or hot chocolate, and Techno will be hibernating early.

Sapnap + lava bath = happy blaze noises

Sapnap also loves cuddles with Karl, having small picnics/tea parties with Karl, laying his head in Karl’s lap while the time traveler tells stories and messes with his hair, can’t forget their small hikes, and collecting cool rocks for their shared collection, or having dinner with Karl.

He misses doing these things with Quackity too

Our avian bois!

Like all avians, the three have to preen and pluck their feathers to keep them healthy. They can either do this themselves or have help - although it’s a little bit emotionally difficult because, well, you know why you shouldn’t touch your bird’s wings. Lovers/Partners and sometimes very close friends and family can help with preening and plucking - parent avians teach their children how to, after all. But, there are some avians who don’t have such feelings or don’t associate those feelings with wing-touching.

Anyways - Phil finds plucking and preening relaxing, Wilbur finds it a chore but can’t help but to relax and calm the f*ck down when someone helps him, and both are calming stims for Tommy.

Phil will mostly do both by himself, but sometimes he asks Techno to help.

Wilbur did both by himself after Sally’s death, and it’s incredibly taboo for him for others to help - he is an avian that associates wing-touching with *ahem*, and has slapped Quackity during an argument when the casino-owner accidentally slapped his hand against them. That ended the argument quickly.

Tommy isnt as big a hugger as he once was. It’s not that he associates wing-touching with *ahem*, its just that he doesn’t want to bother people. He’s traumatized and this is his stim - he’ll deal with it. It doesn’t help that his wings are under-developed. (Tubbo has helped him before, and, once, Tubbo was having a panic attack and Tommy helped him calm down by having Tubbo pluck his feathers. According to Tubbo, they are very soft)

Individually?

Phil likes relaxing with tea and a good puzzle, taking the dogs on a walk, sometimes riding Bob(Steve’s... brother or boyfriend polar bear) through the forest. Sometimes all you need is peace and quiet.

Wilbur still loves making music, but he doesn’t really have any healthy way to relax. Except, maybe, taking naps hugging a pillow tightly.

Tommy has a few ways to unwind and relax. Gardening is his big one, painting, trying a new hobby (like embroidery, knitting, crochet, painting, poetry, learning to mimic bird calls), playing games with Shroud, watching the sunset, watching the stars, reading, rearranging his very goblincore clay figures for the 100th time. He has a lot of free time, he has to use it somehow. He’s taking life slow.

But Tommy’s favorite way to rewind?

Mediation. (and sometimes shifting to his desired realities)

Some of his desired realities include the OSMP (but he hasn’t shifted there in a long time), his “funniest videos”, and this strange thing called MCC?

#dsmp #dream smp #ask

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hongism · 3 years

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i swore i wasn’t going to say anything about the new chapter until tomorrow and until i really process what i just read but fuck, caly. san and y/n’s conversation fucking broke me in a (good) way i can’t even describe. what they feel for each other is so beautiful and heart warming, and i can’t wait to see what will happen from now on, i love their relationship so much… it’s so intense because of how many fucked up things they both went through together and separately, but i love how open they try to be with each other and i truly love to see y/n opening up with people and just learning to process what happened to her through her life.

i was holding my breath for the entire chapter. the break in part, oh my god, so well written, my heart was beating out of my chest the entire time, it was like i was watching a movie inside my head! i also love y/n and hongjoong moments, his character is one of my favorites. i love the captain so so so much i’m dying to know more about him!!! their conversations are always so full of thought provoking things and besides that you can feel how much joong cares about y/n and every single one of the crew. he is so!!!! and the siren powers oh my fucking god the hand through the door and the HEART. easily one of my top 3 fave moc scenes, it was !!!!2)3$/) ahhhhhh!!!!!! so good!!! so g o o d!!!! fuck!!! and san…… i didn’t know how much i missed him until y/n saw him and i just broke into tears (and didn’t stop crying until the end of the chapter, but that’s another thing). you are so so so so so so good at this. i can’t even put into words anymore what i feel when i read your writing, the emotions, the beautiful way you describe what would be just simple things, your characters… you make art, that’s what you do. moc is a masterpiece. i missed it so much, thank you for sharing such a beautiful thing with us, caly <3 - 🧸

hehehe these are the asks i live for :3 im so glad u enjoyed the chapter and had so much to say aaaaaaaaaa let's get into it i can't wait !!

the cream of the crop of the chapter san and y/n's conversation !!! really the most memorable part for me because it seriously shows their feelings and it's gonna hold a lot of weight in the future as well which i think it's something so special for them !! something about them just makes my heart so happy <33

i sure hope you ended up breathing after all YEEHAW BESTIE! im so so happy to hear the action scenes were executed well and came across well!! it felt like a movie while i was writing it hehehe but the y/n and hongjoong moments!! im so glad he's a readers' favorite bc he's one of my faves too, he's really got that air of mystery about him we'll have to see when and how that breaks down over time :3 we're finally seeing him break down and show how he cares about y/n and exactly how much the crew means to him too!!

we're finally seeing more of the siren powers as well!! seeing some funky stuffs coming around but the heart scene! the heart scene!! eeeee so good!? pls i'll sob the heart scene was an intense one but i loved writing it so much !! i'm glad it came across well and was written well !! thank you so incredibly much aaaaa ;-; i missed it so much too i missed writing it i missed talking about it and i missed sharing it with you guys the most T_T

#🧸 anon #mists of celeste #moc: spoilers

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cherriesradio · 3 years

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🍦 for the lovecore asks, please (๑❛ᴗ❛๑)

iwjwiwhwk your so polite with everything and it’s going to kill me ily

this probably took longer than it should’ve jsndish

🍦- name ten things you love about yourself

- I love how I add keyboard smashes to almost everything here. idk they make me happy

- I can’t do assignments right when their due but I CAN have like ten missing assignments due and do them all in like ten minutes which is very officiant

- (when I finally get the courage to) how easy it is for me to make new friends. just like, I’m quiet at first but as soon as you get me going I’m not gonna stop. sorry not sorry bestie

- just how invested I can get in stuff. like, if I get in a fandom I’m staying in it for like a year or two and I’m gonna learn more about than I’ve learned in all of school

- i like not caring about what I wear. like I’ll wear a hoodie to a school dance I don’t care and it’s comfortable

- i really like my middle names (I technically have three)

- how little I like to spend. i feel bad spending money but I also never want to by anything so if I want to get something I have enough money for it

- how I know how to act with different people. like on tumblr, i act really sweet and stuff with people like @/kirishimas-maly-eyeliner but I act more chilled out with @/artof-apollo

- eeeee I feel like I make actually okay moodboards? Idk making them make me happy so :|

- I can bake good (we aren’t gonna mention the burns I’ve gotten)

#ask game

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tiny-smallest · 4 years

Text

in little ways

Rating: G Characters: Steven, Greg Warnings: none Description: The world changing is inevitable, but there’s one thing that will never change in Steven’s life.

Also on AO3!

—

Holy mother of god did I finish something? Slap a hammer in my hand and call me jesus because I’m making miracles.

—

Steven Universe is five years old. He wakes up in the little guest room of Miss Vidalia's house that he lives in every winter when Daddy says she goes to visit her family and crawls out of bed, gulping back tears as he pads his way down the hall to the living room where he shakes his father's sleeping form on the couch.

"Da-daddy?" His tremulous little voice sounds way too loud in the quiet house.

His father is awake in less than a few seconds, sitting upright with a soft gasp and rubbing at his eyes and Steven bites his lip, reaching up for his father's arms. Daddy reaches down and scoops him up and Steven nestles right under his chin with a sniffle, rubbing his nose on his pajama sleeve. "What's wrong, Schtu-ball?" he soothes, fingers stroking through his curls, eyes worried in the light from the street outside.

"Ba-bad dream!" he sobs in a wail, tilting his head back as it comes bursting out of him. "The-there was- there was a bi-big- a big robot! A-an' and it gobbled you all u-up and then it cha-chased me an'-"

"Shhhhhh sh sh shhhh." Daddy's hand is big and warm on his back, rubbing circles into it. "Deep breaths. A bad guy came and ate me?"

"Mmhmm." Big, wet eyes peek pitifully up at him from his chest. "A-an'- an' I was all 'lone."

His father presses a kiss to his forehead, his voice warmer than any blanket. "I'm sorry. That must have been so scary. But I'm right here, kiddo. It didn't happen and it won't ever, okay?"

"Mmmnnn."

"... How about this; why don't we make a plan in case it ever does? That way, you'll know just what to do."

He sniffs. "O-okay..."

"Okay." He smiles, and it is soft and gentle and nothing will ever hurt them ever, so long as Daddy is here. Steven lays his head against his chest. "So here's what we do..."

The rest of the world melts quietly away.

—

Steven Universe is seven and sitting in the van, plucking quietly at his ukulele. His tongue sticks out of his mouth, tiny fingers carefully working to coax the right notes from the strings.

Despite his hard work, the intense concentration, a string snaps. It avoids catching his fingers and the sound isn't even especially loud, but the suddenness of it pulls a sound that is part squeak, part yelp from him.

"How's it going, Schtu-ball?"

He looks up to find Daddy putting a knee onto the edge of the van floor, leaning over to pull a water bottle from the package they'd stopped to buy on their way here. His eyes stray from aiding him in freeing the bottle from the plastic to looking over at Steven with a smile.

The smile fades, a frown of concern taking its place. "Steven?"

Steven looks down at the broken ukulele string with a sniffle.

"Oh," comes the response, further softened. "Here, let Daddy fix that for you?"

He holds his hands out. Steven lifts the ukulele up and over his head, Daddy accepting the instrument and pulling out a repair kit from where it sat behind the box of water bottles.

Steven watches in silence as Daddy pulls out a string and sets about restringing the instrument. He watches as he slides the string through the hole in the back of the piece of wood--the bridge, Daddy had called it--and tied it in place, then pulls it a few inches past the tuning peg he was going to tie it to. He snips off the excess and feeds it through the tuning peg.

"You know," his father says as he worked, "you've been snapping strings more often than usual. Is something wrong? Are you stuck on something?"

Steven shakes his head without really thinking about it. "Jus' not payin' attention as much as I should."

"Oh, well- that happens sometimes." He looks up at him and smiles kindly at him, eyes crinkling at the edges. "It can be hard to focus if you're thinking about something else. Maybe that's a sign you need a break?" He lowers his head to resume his work, but keeps talking. "Remember that talk we had about burnout?"

Steven nods without really thinking about it. There is something really nice about watching him work. He watches Daddy's hands, rough with callouses, carefully work with the tiny pieces of the instrument to restring the ukulele, turning the tuning peg afterwards to tune it.

He wants to be able to do that someday. Maybe he should ask.

What would be the point if you can't play and your song's awful?

"What if they don't like it?" he mumbles.

Steven doesn't realize he'd said that out loud until his father's head jerks up with a look of surprise. "Huh?"

"Nothing," he says quickly, kneading his too-large shirt in embarrassed fistfuls.

Daddy reaches over to draw his fingers through his hair. "Kiddo, is this about the song you wrote for them?"

Steven hunches his shoulders with a wince, but the gentle touch coaxes his head up. His father is still smiling, eyes kind with understanding.

"It's scary," he soothes, "putting your work out there. I know."

He returns to the ukulele for a moment and finishes tuning it, handing it back to Steven before sweeping the small boy onto his lap. He cuddles him close, Steven laying his head back against Daddy's stomach.

"Sometimes you realize how what you made has your heart and soul in it, and it's really scary, exposing that heart to other people. But the gems love you, kiddo. And they'll be so proud that you wrote something for them- much less that you can play it for them!" Steven closes his eyes, listening to the smile in Daddy's voice. "They'll love it because it's your heart and soul. And honestly, also because it's really good."

Steven makes a little noise and his father gives him a light poke.

"I mean it, mister. You've got real talent!"

Steven blinks and looked up at him. "Really?"

"Mmhm." Another poke, to his side. That tickles! He giggles. "With your cute lyrics-"

Another poke. Steven squirms, giggling louder.

"And your nice harmonies-"

"Daddyyyyyyyy!" He tries to shove at the hands both poking him now half-heartedly, overcome with squirming laughter.

"And can't forget that nice angelic voice-"

"Eeeee noooooooo stoooooop!" Steven begins poking his father's belly, making his daddy laugh too. His father lifts the ukulele over his head and begins to tickle under his arms, making Steven shriek with laughter, but he stops after a second and Steven mimics him, prompting his father's own snorts and shouts.

It ends with his father lying on the floor on his back and Steven on his chest, smiling into his face.

His daddy smiles back, laying a hand on his head.

"You do your old man proud already." His eyes shine. "I can't wait to watch you grow up, kiddo. I love you."

Steven wraps his little arms around his father as best he can. "I love you too."

—

Steven Universe is ten, and the autumn breeze is cool on his back as he sits on the bench and swings his legs, ukulele on his lap, fidgeting with the strings. He is bored, frightfully bored, the feeling nails scraping along the inside of his brain, but he just has to try to be patient just a bit longer.

The wind blows a ballroom of fall leaves past him, dancing and twirling on the updraft. He could write a song to that, right? Yeah, he could!

little leaves fall from the trees come twirl up a dance for me! play on the breeze on your way towards the sea come twirl up a dance for me!

He's getting better at the ukulele, he thinks. Dad ran out of stuff to teach him ages ago; said he'd covered all the bases and now there was nothing to do but play. Hone his craft, Dad said. But don't overdo it. Burnout was an awful monster.

So he's careful to follow that advice. But it's hard to, sometimes. He loves to play and write music. He loves snatching new songs from thin air and breathing life into them. He doesn't think he could live if he couldn't create it, play it, learn it, listen to it.

It's like breathing. If he can't do it, he'll suffocate.

He assumed for awhile that everyone was like that. It was jarring when he learned the other children in town didn't experience the same thing.

It's still confusing, even now. Maybe he could understand if there was something they needed the way he and his dad need music, but one of them just... doesn't seem to have that.

It was when he realized that that he also realized this same boy was usually alone. And he always seemed so sad.

Steven swings his legs again, plucking a few idle notes. That song needs work, but he's not feeling it right now. Doesn't mean he can't try coaxing other music from his instrument, though.

How long does it take a bus to get from Ocean Town to Beach City, anyway? Drive faster bus man! I'm dying!

A honk startles him and his mouth falls open as the bright yellow bus pulls up. "I SUMMONED IT!" he crows as the children file off the bus. They all look at him, but he's only looking back for one boy-

And there he is!

"LARS!" He leaps up and waves, and the other boy flinches back, staring at him first in confusion and then... frowns?

The other kids are staring too. Weird.

"St-steven- what- what are you doing here!" He recovers fast, hands on his hips. Steven smiles despite the scowl.

"I waited for you! I thought we could go to the arcade-"

"No." He glares around. Steven isn't sure who he's glaring at. The other kids are gone.

Lars's face relaxes a bit when he realizes this, and without another word, he turns to walk away.

"W-wait!" Steven jumps up off the bench. "I- I thought-"

Lars doesn't stop.

"O-okay! M-maybe tomorrow then!" Still nothing. "Uh- Saturday! Saturday's fine!"

Lars turns the corner. Steven droops.

"They've got a Saturday special?" he pleads to no one.

The leaves whirl again. Steven watches them before sighing and grabbing his ukulele.

It's a quiet walk to the car wash. He finds his dad just inside the building with the big brushes, hosing it down, and can't find the will to wave when Dad waves first. The bright smile droops, and Dad turns the hose off as he draws near.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, setting it aside.

"Lars didn't wanna go to the arcade," Steven mumbles, folding his arms across his chest. His father pats his shoulder.

"Maybe he's just busy?"

"Maybe..." He looks away. Dad crouches onto one knee.

"Maybe he's just grumpy. Maybe he had a bad day and he needs space." He hesitates. "Maybe he's just- not a very nice kid."

Steven balks. "Oh no! He's not a bad kid! He's just sad."

"Those things aren't exclusive, buddy."

His dad's voice is gentle, but Steven isn't having it. "But he just looks sad! Maybe he's scared of anyone knowing."

He fidgets.

"Or maybe I'm just not doing it right," he adds in a sad little whisper.

"Oh- Steven, no..." Dad cups his face with both hands. "... One of the hardest lessons you'll ever learn is... sometimes you can be the nicest you you can be, and it still won't be enough."

He tucks a particularly unruly curl behind his ear, something in his eyes heavy. "Sometimes people just aren't compatible. And sometimes they're just mean. That's not your fault, son."

"... But he seems so... lonely. Won't he feel better if he just has a friend? Doesn't he just need a friend...?"

His father's smile was sad. "... He probably would feel better if he had a friend. But you don't need to be that friend."

"But I wanna be."

Dad kisses the top of his head.

"You're a sweet kid," he murmurs. "But you don't need to be everybody's friend."

"I wanna be his. He's nice. I like him."

His father let out a soft sigh, cupping his face. "Maybe he really is just grumpy today, or sad, and needs space. But there's no shame in leaving something be."

Steven's insides squirms. "I... I wanna keep trying. But... he doesn't wanna today. And I don't wanna go alone."

Dad straightens up and looked around the car wash, a hand still on his head. "... You know what? It's been a really slow day here, stchu-ball. Let me finish up here and I'll close up early, and we can go."

He brightens, feeling the stars return to his step as he starts bouncing. "Really!?"

Dad never closes up early, though!

He smiles at him. "As long as you don't mind hanging out with your old man."

"Never! Never ever! Oh my god c'mon dad let's go let's hurry up what do you need help with-"

His father's laughter echoes around the building as Steven grabs the hose and charges deeper inside.

—

Steven Universe is fourteen, turned fourteen three days ago, actually, and is standing side-by-side with his father at his bathroom sink, razor held in nervous, twitchy fingers. "Like this, right?"

"Yup, just like that. Now you want to put it against your face like this-" Dad demonstrated with a razor of his own, the protective plastic casing over the blade to avoid actually maiming his beard. "And then slowly, carefully draw it down. No need to rush."

Steven draws the razor down his face in a slow but shaky motion, letting out a soft gasp of pain. "Ah!"

Dad winces in sympathy. "Well- close, yeah. You okay? How good did it get you-" He leans over his son to check without waiting for an answer. Steven let him look at the cut on his chin for a moment before reaching for the box of bandaids, his hand touching his father's hand instead of the box. They look at one another and laugh.

"Sorry," Dad apologizes as he withdrew his hand to let Steven take the box, smile sheepish. "Guess you can uh- patch up your own cuts, huh?"

"Well I mean..." He looks at the weeping cut and winces. "... Yeah, but still. Thanks."

He blinks as Steven opens the box and fishes out a bandaid. "For what?"

"For taking time out to help me," he answers as he peeled off the paper and aligned the cotton part with the cut. "I guess I was a little eager and a little too nervous at the same time?" He laughs, a little shakily. Like his hands. "I always mess up worse when I'm like that. Too excited to do the thing and too nervous to really stop and think and steady myself so I can do it right."

His father's warm hand comes to rest on his back, and when Steven looks up and over at him, it was to kind eyes gazing down at him with a fondness beyond measure. "Everyone's a little nervous about new things. Even good things. Especially big, new things, like milestones."

Steven thinks about the way Connie smiled at him, and cuddled into his chest, and how the wind had tugged at her curls in the summer sunset. Like growing up and falling in love? he wants to ask.

"Like shaving?" he asks instead.

"Like shaving," Dad ruffles his hair. "And sometimes you make mistakes, but that's learning any skill. Your old man will always be here to help you master them, however long it takes."

Steven looks back into the mirror, at the only facial hair he'd grown and yet still somehow managed to miss.

Connie declaring she liked him even if he didn't grow at the same pace as her, would always care about him, something that felt so, so obvious in hindsight by how she panicked when she thought he'd melted into a microscopic thing.

"Even if it takes awhile?"

"Always."

He stares at their reflections, side-by-side, the hand on his back, and picks up the razor again with a smile.

"Thanks."

—

Steven Universe is sixteen and sitting across from his father at breakfast, resisting the urge to swing his feet like a child because the buzz in his brain and the core of his being won't go away.

He meant it when he told Dad he thought he could pull off the new look, he really did. Dad is Dad and will always be Dad, no matter what his hair looked like.

And it is because of that fact that his gut still aches. As his father makes small talk about the weather and Little Homeschool and some of the new Beach City gem residents, Steven finds himself staring at the short hair, especially when Dad turns to address their waitress, removing the threat of him noticing Steven staring for about a minute.

He sees the look she gives them, too. Not many people know the Universes that well, but everyone knows of them. Dad is less invisible to the fellow humans of Beach City than he is to the gems that inhabited the town to work and learn and play. While they remain oblivious to the fact that something awful must have happened, the human townies sure aren't. Their waitress's look is one of nosy worry.

Steven prays she won't act on that worry.

He likes to think that all these years together means he can read Dad like a book. Every gesture, every crease and line in his face, every widening of the eyes. Steven prides himself on reading people in general, and he knows his Dad better than he knows just about anyone else. Better than just about anyone else knows Dad, actually.

And what he reads right now are glaring signs of upset. It shows in the slight shake of his hands when he goes to cut his waffles, the lines around his eyes, the slightly-too-wide look he throws the way of the door when it suddenly opens with too much force because quartzes never know their own strength ever.

It reminds him of when they escaped the Zoo. The tremors, the fake smiles, the frightened eyes that sometimes glazed over. The realization he'd failed in his promise to make sure gem stuff never touched his dad again was something that had hit him earlier, but it doesn't make the resurfacing of that realization suck any less. His gut feels like lead, filled with so much guilt he could be sick with it.

His dad trembles a little all over as the quartzes step inside, crowing about... something he has no context for.

He desperately doesn't want anyone to call attention to it. Dad's already not having a good time. Please don't make it worse.

Thankfully their waitress does not. She sticks around for a second as Dad cuts into his breakfast, left frozen for a moment by the sudden loud entrance of the quartzes, before smiling at them and going to see what the gems might want.

His father laughs, a little too forcefully, and shakes his head. "You'd think they'd learn how light wooden doors are sometime!"

"You'd think," Steven manages to chuckle, shoveling a bite of pancakes into his mouth. It tastes like sawdust. Maybe the cook's new.

Something must have shown on his face, because Dad pauses before lowering his fork and reaching across the table. "Hey," he says softly. "Are you okay?"

He asked that question not even an hour ago and somehow it's harder to answer this time.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He forces a smile. It must not have worked, because Dad's frown only deepens and the knot in his forehead only gets more pronounced. "Really," Steven adds.

"... I know what happened this morning was- scary." Dad's grip tightens on his shoulder before letting go. He doesn't return to his food so much as push it around on his plate a little. "I know you said you were okay earlier but- really- if you need to talk-"

"No, I'm fine," Steven promises. The words fall out so easily and naturally he barely hears himself say them, doesn't have to think about it. "Really."

Dad puts his fork down and looks at him with a gaze so strongly empathetic that Steven for a moment fears his father is actually staring into his soul. "... I believe you," he said after a moment. "But if it ever suddenly becomes... not fine, come tell me, okay? I won't be bothered by it."

Steven nods, still smiling. Dad said the same thing when he kept asking after the Zoo, kept getting the same answer, but really, how wouldn't it be a bother? Dad had his own worries then, and he does now.

Dad believed him after the umpteenth time of being promised he was fine, his gentle offer always present each time but especially stressed the last time before he dropped the questioning entirely, and this time is no different.

If only he had believed Dad's promise in return.

—

Steven Universe is seventeen and curled around his phone, under his comforter, trying to ignore the sunlight against his bed.

He should get up. He should go take a shower and brush his teeth. He should get something to eat. He should go sit outside. If absolutely nothing else, he should do just that really short list.

But he can't move. He should get up. He should get up. Why can't he move? He notices a pink glow against his phone and lets out a noise somewhere between a whine and a growl.

"Schtu-ball?"

He jolts, brain taking a minute to catch up to reality. Steven pushes his comforter aside a little to peek out, his father's worried face looking back.

At the sight of him, Dad's concern melts into a smile. "Hey," he says in hushed tones. "How're you feeling?"

Like I can't even talk. He gives his father a grimace. A knot of concerned sympathy set itself in Dad's forehead.

"Want food?"

Does he? He thinks he does. He should eat something anyway. So he nods. Dad smiled at him and straightened, leaving the room.

Steven isn't sure how much time passed in a foggy haze, but it's disturbed when Dad returns. The smell of pancakes make him blink, pushing his comforter aside to sit up.

"You didn't have to-" he starts, voice cracking as his father passes him the plate. His creaky protests are immediately smothered with a very careful hug.

"I did," Dad soothes. "And I wanted to."

"But-"

"Shhh. No buts." He draws back, smoothing back Steven's hair as he sits on the edge of the bed. "Is it a talking day? Or a quiet sharing space day?"

Steven hesitates before holding up two fingers.

"You got it." The large hand begins to rub his back in circles as Steven rubs tears from his eyes. Stupid! Why is he crying!?

He's nibbling at the meal when his father adds, very quietly, "It's a lot. Sometimes things overflow. It's okay to cry. It's okay to talk. It's okay to not talk. Whatever you need, I'm here."

He turns to look at his father's face, at his dark brown eyes filled with so much love, before he rubs his eyes and begins to eat, really eat- slowly, but surely.

He leans into Dad's side.

Dad pats his back.

—

Steven Universe is eighteen. The world snaps into focus with jarring, sickening suddenness, like he just fell from one plane of existence to another. In a way, he did.

He lays there, gasping in the silence that thunders in his ears, in the thick heat settling over the room. He shudders, feeling tears track down the sides of his face, head full of cotton and fog. Where is he? What day is it? What time is it? It's dark.

He doesn't like that it's dark.

He tries to get out bed. Falls. The thud shakes the house and Steven whimpers as he tries to kick away the sheets twined around his leg, the feeling of being pinned making his stomach turn. He succeeds, flailing to his feet, opening the door to the balcony.

He hesitates, slams it shut, runs downstairs, and flees out the front door instead, taking the stairs two at a time and nearly falling his way down them.

The sea spray is a nearly welcome bite against his skin at first, but despite doing better to draw him into reality, it doesn't make the sick pit in his stomach go away. He is now wide awake, painfully wide awake, and yet every fiber of his body still shrieks sirens. His pulse is near painful.

He slows to a stop along the beachfront, doubling over, hands on his knees, breath coming in gulps and gasps.

What now?

He could go find the gems. He has full access to the temple, welcome whenever he wants.

He doesn't want to find the gems. They can't help him here.

Steven takes a moment to contemplate the trembling of his body before he admits what it is he actually needs to do, and he straightens, turning to jog back around to the boardwalk. Reaching where the wood meets the sand of the beach and the grass of the hill, he runs up the block towards the car wash, feeling his gut churn. He doesn't realize until he stops running that he'd even started, chest heaving.

He hesitates at the sight of the van before he pushes back the faint this is dumb this is dumb this is duuuuumb you're too old for this sort of shit echoing in scolding bursts from the back of his head and stands on his tiptoes to peer through the diamond window in the back of the van.

There's Dad, asleep, bundled comfortably in what was probably a more orderly setup at some point and during the night devolved into more of a nest than anything else.

Overpowering relief sweeps in like the tide he had just been running adjacent to a few minutes ago. His knees turn to jelly and a powerful burn creeps into his eyes, Steven covering his mouth and putting his back to the van, sliding to the ground and stifling as a sob. The van is icy against his back even through the random yellow shirt he'd decided to designate a pajama shirt. His hand finds his hair, grasping fingers twisting themselves into his curls, his other hand still over his mouth.

It's unusually chilly for a summer night. In two weeks he leaves for his road trip. These are random facts that have nothing especially to do with the situation and yet they're dredged to the forefront of his mind. Why?

Steven takes a moment to sit with the thought. The former is probably just because it's miserable. He's miserable. He doesn't want to be here, in this moment, right now, and the chilly night air is compounding his inner turmoil. The second...

Can he really say he's ready for this venture when just a single nightmare is enough to rip him apart like this?

It's a thought so upsetting he yanks himself away from it like touching a hot stove. His therapist would be disappointed in him for not engaging with the thought. He really doesn't have the energy to do much but hate his cowardice for a brief moment and then try to move on.

Dad. Dad is fine. Dad is safe. You can go home now.

... But he doesn't want to.

The thought makes his stomach squirm. What is he supposed to do? Wake Dad up? Bother him with the figment of his imagination? Hey Dad, I know it's like three in the morning, but funny thing- I had a dream about Eyeball and Aquamarine using that knife to do exactly what they were planning! So, how about the weather, huh?

No, he really doesn't think he had to bring that up again.

... He could wake him up without telling him details, though. Should he wake him up? Would that be selfish?

He could hear his therapist. "Steven, people love you. Let them love you. It's not a crime to accept the different ways they love you even when it inconveniences them; relationships are give and take."

Well, guess Dad's getting his money's worth, he thinks, slowly, shakily rising to his feet.

It still feels wrong. It's the reminder that Greg would be even sadder if he didn't wake him--even if Steven knows that's not the proper motivation--that makes him swallow and knock on the window, finally.

Greg jerks, sitting upright so quickly Steven can hear his back crack. This was a mistake.

But it's too late now. Greg's head turns towards where the sound came from, blearily blinking sleep from his eyes, and freezes as awareness hits. He scrambles up to his knees and Steven can hear him fumbling to crawl over to the doors, throwing them open as Steven makes his way around to the back. "Steven? Steven what-?"

"Hi Dad," he whispers around the thick lump in his throat, feeling supremely stupid, standing there shivering the way he is.

Dad makes a soft hushing noise, ushering him inside with sweeping gestures of his arms, and Steven is too weak to resist, especially since he did just wake the man up. He crawls inside, Greg immediately bundling him in one of the blankets he'd been using for sleeping before hugging him tight. Steven watches as he unsuccessfully tries to close the door without letting go of him by hooking his foot on the inside handles, but he manages it before Steven can apologize and move to do it himself.

"You're freezing!" he laments, letting go of him just enough so as to lean back and get a look at him. "What happened!?"

Feeling his father's warmth retreat even just a little leaves a yawning yearning somewhere in his center. Without giving himself time to think much more on it Steven moves forward to follow his father's movement and buries his face into the crook of his neck. "Nightmare," he croaked, willing his voice to hold and disappointed it doesn't do anything of the sort. "I just- I just had to make sure you were okay."

The tenseness in his father's form melted a little with the promise of no imminent threat, Dad reaching up with one hand to softly stroke his fingers carefully through his hair. "Oh Steven..." He felt his father's face press against his head for a moment and only half swallowed the whine that slipped out. "I'm here. Everything's okay. You need to talk about it?"

"No no nO NO DON'T PLEASE STEVEN HELP-"

He couldn't shake his head, buried against him like this, but he untangled his hands from the blanket enough to fist them in his father's shirt. You can feel his pulse like this. This is him. He's okay. He's alive. They didn't hurt him. You didn't let them. He found a way out, and you made sure they didn't go into the house after him, and then the gems squashed them outside.

"... I can't," he pleads. His father's arms squeeze him tighter.

"Writing?" comes the soft suggestion.

"Not this time. Not-"

Would he be ready to share this anytime soon?

... No, he can't promise that. He can't say 'later' when he didn't know when that would be. It would be too much like lying.

"Not yet. Dunno if soon."

"Okay," Dad soothes. He begins rubbing circles into his back. "Do you want to stay the night?"

"... Do you mind?" His voice sounds pathetic even to him.

"Never," he promises.

Steven swallows back a sob with a gulp and nuzzles his face into Dad's shoulder. His father's chest begins to vibrate as Greg starts to hum; a low, soft, gentle white noise he's heard a million times.

And will a million more, Steven realizes.

And will a million more.

Steven lets the heavy tension begin to leave, feels the coiled bands in his muscles loosen.

He lets his heavy lids finally close.

The rest of the world melts quietly away.

#steven universe #steven quartz universe #su steven #greg universe #su greg #greg su #steven universe su #my writing #man i have no idea what the popular tags are for these character sljfdf

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