#i am half joking I still like him more than abs guy but like dude chill you wear a Pompadour no need to shout

[mazojo]

Arakita is a MENACE

[spookybreadstick]

Hey!!!! I was wondering if you could write a scenario for Toby confessing to his s/o 😳👉👈 - dancing parrot 🐦🎶🐦🎶

Okay so I wasn’t quite sure where I wanted to go with this, I had so many ideas it was hard to choose so I kind of meshed two of my favorite ideas into one lol. I hope it’s okay, it’s my longest (I’m pretty sure anyway) little scenario yet and I’m nervous/excited to post it. I personally think it’s kinda cute but uh let me know guys 😅 I also had it be Toby confessing that he has a crush on the reader, and for the purposes of this scenario the reader is female (I tried, but it’s harder than I thought to write gender neutral scenarios) 

NOTE: I am trying out different ways to incorporate Toby’s tics into the writing, because I think it is an important part of his character and I want to honor that while having it be respectful and also easier to read. I put his tics in * * so that it is easier to see when he’s having a verbal tic because otherwise it can look a lil funky. Let me know if this was an okay way to go about it, I’m still learning! 

🪓 Toby Confesses To His (Female) S/O  🪓

"Dude, stop star-staring. You're making it weird." Toby whispered to BEN, who was currently staring intently at you from a distance.

"How do you think I'm gonna help you if I don't know what I'm doing?" BEN barely glanced at Toby, who was fidgeting nervously beside him.

After a couple of seconds, BEN turned to Toby. "I don't know, dude. I need to see you guys in action."

"What does that mean?" Toby asked.

"Just go over and talk. Act natural. I need to see the vibe between you two." BEN said, nudging Toby towards you despite his whispers of protest.

Seeing Toby walk slowly towards you, you turned and greeted him. "Hey, Toby. What are you doing?"

"Uh, nothing. Just, uh, j-just walking..? He trailed off uncertainly.

You didn't seem to mind his awkward behavior, and continued to chat with him for another minute or two. Well, it was more like you were chatting at him rather than with him. Toby was just standing there uncomfortably, as he tried to will all of his tics away for a few minutes. It's hard when he's nervous and trying to make himself look good in front of you. Suddenly, you were being pulled away by one of the other pastas who wanted your opinion on something. Toby watched you leave the room, waving goodbye as you went.

"Dude. That was literally the worst thing I've ever seen." BEN appeared beside Toby, laughing.

"Knock *knock who's there?* knock it off." Toby gave him a slight shove.

"I can't help you if you're gonna be a dweeb about it." BEN shrugged.

"I'm not being a dweeb!" Toby cried indignantly.

"Okay, sure." BEN rolled his eyes.

"So?" Toby asked eagerly.

"So, what?"

"So, does she like me too?"

"I mean, she must like you at least a little. You were standing there like a goober, and she didn't care."

"BEN!"

"I'm sorry, but that was some classic comedy material right there. I could have made, like, a dozen jokes about the whole thing. All I'm saying is, she didn't take a golden opportunity to make fun of you, so maybe you do stand a chance after all."

"Okay, well, are you gonna help me *hide the body* help me win her over or what?" Toby crossed his arms.

"Nah. It's too much fun to watch you make a fool out of yourself." BEN grinned.

"Dude, seriously?"

"Look, I may be a man of talent, but I can't pass my flirt skills on to you. They'd just go to waste, man."

"Thanks a lot." Toby huffed.

"The best advice I can give you is to just relax, man. Just chill out, and don't act like you have rigor mortis. The whole time she was talking to you, you were rooted to the spot and your limbs were all tight. Don't do that. Just be loose and let it happen, you know?"

"Do you think I should tell her how I feel?" Toby asked timidly, shifting his weight from side to side. He really did like you. And he didn't always get so nervous around you, he reasoned to himself. He was better in groups, at least, when some of the attention was off of him.

"I don't know." BEN shrugged.

"You're talking about Y/N, right?" Hoodie asked, stepping into the room.

"Jesus, man, you scared the shit out of me!" BEN yelped.

"Sorry. Toby, do you have a crush on Y/N?"

"No! Why would you think *clink clink clink* that?"  

"You're pretty obvious about your feelings, Toby."

"D-do you think she knows?" Toby asked, dread crawling through his body. "I mean, it doesn't m-matter, it's not like I like her or anything, I just want to know." He added quickly, trying to cover his tracks.

"No, I don't think so." Hoodie replied, after a moment of thought.

"Why do you care?" BEN asked Hoodie, peering at him suspiciously.

Hoodie shrugged. "I don't care too much. Just figured Toby would want to know if she was dating somebody else. I mean, if he did like her." Hoodie cocked his head to the side, looking at Toby through his mask.

"W-what do you mean? She's dating somebody?" Toby's hand began to involuntarily rub at his neck.

"Not yet anyway. But I did hear that Jeff might ask her out." Hoodie said casually.

"Jeff? Tha-" BEN's words were quickly cut off by Hoodie smacking him in the side. Toby's mind was too preoccupied with visions of you and Jeff together, that he didn't notice.

"S-shit. Do... do you think she'd say y-yes?" Toby asked apprehensively.

"I don't know. But if you did have feelings for Y/N, which you say you don't, but if you did then you should probably tell her how you feel before Jeff does. Just in case." Hoodie said pointedly.

Toby nodded his head several times before yelling about how he had to do something (something totally unrelated) and then dashing out of the room.

~~

Toby ran down the lengths of the corridors, desperate to find you before Jeff could. His heart pinched to think of what would happen if you did decide to go out with Jeff. He couldn't bear it.

Toby was so lost in his thoughts that he narrowly missed running directly into Sally, who was wandering the halls as well.

"Sorry, Sally, I gotta go." Toby puffed, out of breath.

"Toby! You gotta come play with me!" Sally looked at him with eyes full of childish begging.

"Not now, Sal." Toby bounced impatiently, waiting for her to move.

"Toby Rogers, you come play with me right now!" Sally crossed her arms. "Or I'll tell Slendy that you were being mean to me."

Toby looked down at her in shock. "You wouldn't."

Sally stuck her tongue out playfully. Toby sighed, then ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

"Fine! *Fine wine, very fine wine* I-I'll go play with you. But it has to be quick, I'm really *busy bee* busy!" Toby pleaded.

"Okey-dokey!" Sally exclaimed happily, grabbing Toby's hand and pulling him along to her playroom.

~~

When Toby entered Sally's playroom, he was expecting to find the table set for tea, with various stuffed animals positioned into chairs and dressed in different colored tutus. That wasn't a surprise. What was an unexpected surprise, however, was finding you sitting in one of Sally's pink plastic chairs. Toby skidded to a stop, like a deer in headlights, taking in the sight of you perched in the tiny chair with a princess tiara on your head.

"Hi, Toby." You waved slightly. "Like the tiara?"

"Uh, yeah. It, um, it looks-it looks great." Toby stuttered out.

"We're going to play Princess Tea Time." Sally announced loudly, putting on a tiara of her own. 

"Y/N and I are going to be princesses, of course." Sally gestured to the matching tiaras.

"Tickles and Marmalade will be the Ladies-in-Waiting." Sally pointed to a pink bear and a blue triceratops. "Larry is going to be a knight, and my very romantic fiance." She gestured to a manatee.

"And Toby is going to be the prince from another kingdom that comes to tea!" Sally beamed.

Toby plastered a big fake smile on his face before Sally's game of play-pretend began.

~~

The three of you had been playing for a good twenty minutes, and Toby had been having a good time in spite of the circumstances. He had been enjoying himself enough to have forgotten about the whole Jeff thing entirely. Sally was serving real cookies, and there was fruit punch in the pink teapot. Sally is an excellent little actress, and she had adopted an over-the-top British accent to go with her whole "diva princess madly in love with the lowly knight" vibe that she had going. Toby found himself relaxing as time went on, and he found his ability to actually converse like a normal person. He had even made a few jokes that you'd laughed at.

However, Sally decided it was high time to raise the stakes of her little game.

"Prince Toby, what just fell out of your pocket?" Sally asked, pointing to a spot of nothing on the floor. She leaned over to pick up nothing off the floor, then pretended to 'read' whatever it was. She gasped dramatically, hands over her heart.

"Prince Toby! This letter states your love for Princess Y/N!" Sally exclaimed. "And just when were you going to confess to my dear sister?"

"I-I-um, I-" Toby stuttered, unable to think of how to play along. This was becoming too close for comfort.

"It's true?!" Sally gasped dramatically once more, ignoring Toby's failed acting attempt. "Good heavens! Sister, what do you think?"

"I... I don't know, dear sister. What ever should I do?" You asked Sally, half-playing along.

"Well, we have to determine if Prince Toby's love for you is true." Sally turned to Toby excitedly. He stared at her blankly in return. 

"Well? Go on, tell her how you feel." Sally urged.

Toby looked at you and suddenly words starting coming out of his mouth that seemed to stumble right from his heart. "I don't know how to act when I'm around you, because you make me so nervous. You're the most amazing person I've ever met in my life. You're like... like a goddess to me. You're so beautiful, and kind, and you're always so nice to me of all people, and I really wanted to tell you this before, especially since there's other guys that want your heart, but I was scared of what you'd say..." Toby trailed off, heart racing. "I, uh, that's how the prince, I mean me, that's how I feel about you. Princess Y/N." Toby tripped over his words, trying to act like it was all part of the game.

"Now that was romantic." Sally sighed happily.

~~

The game ended shortly after that, due to Slender calling Sally downstairs so she could watch some cartoons that she liked, which was a good thing since Toby could hardly bring himself to look you in the eyes. He worried that you had read between the lines and realized that his words were actually true. Sally had just skipped out of the room when Toby stood and faced you. You stood as well, plucking your tiara from your head and fiddling with it.

"That was a pretty intense game." You half-laughed after several beats of awkward silence.

"Y-yeah, it was." Toby looked at the ground.

"Sally's got quite the imagination."

"Yeah. *Yeah, yeah*"

"You do too."

"What?"

"I mean, coming up with that whole thing about how the prince feels about the princess? That was pretty creative."

"Oh, yeah... about that..." Toby trailed off. "S-sorry if I made you uncomfortable or anything."

"No, no, it's fine. You were just playing the part." You smiled to try to put his obvious nerves at ease.

"But-but I wasn't." Toby looked you in the eyes.

"You weren't?"

"No, I..." Toby drew in a deep breath. "I really like you."

"In what way?" You asked, half in a whisper.

"That-that way. The-the lovey kind of way?" Toby half-whispered back, unsure of your reaction.  

"Really?" Your eyes brightened with hope.

"I like you so much and I really want to be your-your....your prince." Toby looked down at his hands, before glancing back at you. "If-if you want me to. I get it if you d-don't like me..."

"No!" You cut him off. "I like you, too."

"In that same way?" Toby glanced at you hopefully.

"Yes. In that same lovey kind of way." You repeated his words with a smile on your face.

Toby's entire face lit up with joy as he pulled you in close for a hug and maybe a kiss.

~~

"Guess things worked out for old Toby after all." BEN mentioned to Hoodie after the two of you announced to the mansion later that day that you were together.

"I guess they did." Hoodie commented. 

"What about the whole Jeff thing, though? He never mentioned anything to me, and I'm his best friend, and then you practically body-slammed me earlier when I was talking about it." BEN turned to face Hoodie.

"Oh, I made that all up." Hoodie said casually taking a sip of the drink he was holding.

"What? Dude, why?" BEN shook his head in confusion.

"Because," Hoodie began as he looked across the room at the happy new couple, "he would never have told her otherwise if I didn't give him just a little push."  

[hawklanthebard]

Fractured Diamond: Chapter One

"Good game today, guys!" Leon spoke as enthusiastic as he could between short breaths as he wiped his red, drenched face with one of the handtowels Taka, of course, had prepared for them. "Whew! Today'd kick insomnia's ass." 

"Language, Kuwata." Taka chided as he grazed an ice-cold water bottle against Leon's cheek.

"What? 'Ass' isn't a swear word. C'mon, man. Mondo swears and you say nothing. And he says worse things than 'ass'!" 

Taka hadn't broken scolding eye contact with Leon as he handed a bottle to Mondo. "Swearing is part of Mondo's character. I still scold him for other things, like when he doesn't completely wipe his face after eating. I always have to pick off a grain of rice from his mouth when we pass in the hallway." 

Leon smirked. "Oh, is that what you call it?" 

If he was paying attention and his abs weren't sore, the red-head would've been able to duck from the basketball as it bouched off his sweaty midsection with a hard, wet pat. "Oof!" 

"Next time, I'll aim lower, Kuwata." Mondo shot a half-wholehearted-half-serious glare. Although, he wasn't completely sure why he'd even bother hiding the implications. Everyone in Hope's Peak knew. It was practically an unavoidable subject. Still, he supposed it was worth protecting Taka's honor, even if it was from a half-wit joke. 

Leon's knees buckled as he leaned against a locker for support and the other arm clenched over his abdomen. "Noted." he groaned with a pained smile as he sat down to catch his breath. "What about you, Fujisaki? You were a lot faster today." 

Chihiro brushed a soaked strand of hair from his eyes. "Oh. Thank you. Although, all of that praise should go to Mondo. It was his training that got me here." The little programmer exchanged a sheepish smile to the biker, who then returned a genuinely proud one. 

Chihiro came a long way since their first year, posing as a girl as not to be called out for being "weak for a boy". The jeers from students in the hallway didn't help much either. But with much time and patience, Chihiro was finally able to come out to Mondo, then slowly to Taka and Leon. All three were unconditionally supportive and swore to keep the secret. Even mustering up the courage to ask to play Shirts vs Skins with them. 

"Hey, don't give me too much credit. My role was easy, but you did the hard part on your own. Askin' for help takes guts." Mondo gave himself a sad chuckle as he scratched his shoulder. Guts he wished he had. "Maybe one day, you'll be playing Skins against me."

"Oh, that reminds me." Leon chimed in. "I've been meaning to ask this. I know why Chihiro chose to be Shirts, but why you, Mondo?"

Mondo looked up from where he was sitting, previous traces of humor silenced. "What do you mean?" 

"Well, I mean, c'mon. A big muscular guy like you? I'd thought you'd wanna show them off."

"What, you trying to hit on me?" Mondo hid his suspicion with a chuckle. "I mean, we all know you chose Skins to show off that new piercing."  Maybe changing the subject would steer Leon away, Mondo thought. 

Much to Mondo's relief, Leon's cheeks grew pink as he glanced at his new shiny nipple ring. "Oh yeah, ya got me there." he laughed, running a hand through his hair. "Uh, so, you think Maizono noticed? Think she likes it?" 

"Heh. I wouldn't count on it, Kuwata. I think she's into that Naegi kid she hangs out with." 

"Huh?!" Leon gasped, "Am I trying too hard? Is she more into ordinary guys?" Mondo reached a hand to Leon's shoulder. "Relax. You've got just as much as a chance with her as that smelly mechanic dude has with the princess chick."

"But that guy has NO chance!" Leon cried, sweeping Mondo's hand off his shoulder. 

"Sorry, bro." the biker laughed. Leon turned away embarrassed, face redder than his hair. Mondo knew he would have to make it up to him later, but right now he's just glad that avoided talking about...that....with Leon. 

Ding dong, bing bong!

The school bell rang to announce the students to return to their dorms for the night. Saved by the bell, as they say. 

The four boys made no rush to put on their street clothes, they were going to put them in the laundry anyway. They stuffed their gym belongings into their own duffle bags and headed out the locker room. Mondo had stuffed his school jacket in there too, leaving on his tank top. A decision he'd soon regret. 

Leon glanced at Mondo's shoulder, something peeked under the white fabric, just between his neck and shoulder blade. A faint scar. 

"Hey, Mondo. How'd you get that scar?"

His words were cut short when he bumped into the biker's back with a strong thud. Leon looked up at Mondo, who didn't glance back. His eyes shrouded in shadow from his hair, but the aura around him was unmistakably filled with something Mondo gave off regularly, but only on very bad days with just the four of them; Rage. 

"What did you say?" the biker spoke menacingly, causing the baseball star to cower like a homeless kitten.

"I-I just asked where you got that sca..?" 

"I heard you, dipshit!" Mondo spat, "I'm asking how did you know?!"

"Uh, I...can.." Leon swallowed, his body shaking like a leaf. 

Taka placed a gentle hand on Mondo's shoulder, trying to ease the tension. "Hey, what's wrong, bro? Leon didn't mean to cause any strife." Despite his attempts, Mondo's anger hadn't faltered. 

"Did you see it too?! Or you?!" Mondo shot a panicked glare at Taka and Chihiro, who felt as if his fragile heart had left his chest at the sudden accusation. Leon stood between them, facing Mondo again.

"Hey, calm down, dude! It was me! I was the first and only one who noticed it. Don't drag them into this!"

"For your sake, you'd fuckin' better be the only one who knows! If your nosey ass tells anyone, I'm gonna make sure it's the last mistake you ever make, Kuwata!" And with that, Mondo stormed out of the gym, leaving the three shocked and confused. 

Mondo slammed his door so hard, he'd sure knock it off its hinges if he did it again. Tossing his duffle bag on the floor without a care as to where it landed, he stomped to the bathroom sink and splashed some cold water on his face, an anger management technique he learned from Taka. When he was done, he glanced at his reflection in the mirror. His pompadour shroud over his face, strands of long light brown hair scattered everywhere in a tangled mess. He didn't look like the Ultimate Biker Gang Leader. He didn't look like a Diamond. Like a child afraid of their own shadow, he was a coward afraid of his own scars. He was just as weak as he was then. That day.   

[chromemist]

Smutember Day1: Dirty Talk

My first contribution to Smutember! Day 1 , dirty talk. I went with sexting. Voltron fandom, Klance.

Warnings: bottom keith, top lance, talk of light bdsm/spanking/rimming.

Lance felt his phone vibrate in his jacket pocket. He'd forgotten to turn it on silent mode before class started. But he was in a boring lecture where he could easily get all the same information from the textbook, so he wasn't as irritated as he should be. He could use a distraction from the teacher’s drone. Looking at his lock screen, he saw that Keith had sent him an image.

Lance and Keith hung around the same circle of friends, and while they weren't enemies, they didn't see eye to eye most times. Lance didn't know exactly what it was about Keith that bugged him, if he were being completely honest with himself. Maybe what bugged him about Keith was what attracted him to the dark haired, moody boy. But he tried not to be that honest with himself about Keith. It was just easier to ignore the sexual tension between them if he just didn't acknowledge it.

Sighing, Lance hid his phone behind his laptop and opened the chat. And then nearly choked on his breath. He coughed lightly twice to hide his surprise and not raise the suspicion of the teacher.

Because Keith had sent him a nearly nude photo.

'Holy shit, I could've been taping that?!' Lance thought wildly, forgetting he was not supposed to be acknowledging Keith's good looks.

In the photo, Keith was standing in front of his mirror, the rest of his single dorm room laid behind him. But the focus, really, was on Keith. Or rather his half naked body. The camera was angled so that it showed only the bottom half of his face, the bottom lip being bitten with a half smirk.

Lance's eyes roamed down the pale flesh, and he could feel the drool pooling in his mouth already over the dark trail of hair leading down from Keith's belly. The hair disappeared under a pair of very small, very tight, bright red boxer briefs. The thumb of Keith's free hand was dug into the waistband, pulling one side down to show off more tantalizing skin.

*Keith: 'How do they look on me?'

Lance nearly choked on air again. No! This wasn't happening! He was not oogling his sort-of friend. He was not imagining tracing the defined abs with his tongue. He was not committing to memory the shape of Keith's dick straining against the shorts.

And he certainly was not getting hard in the middle of his class.

Desperately trying to ignore the lust thrumming through his veins, he texted back with shaky hands.

*Lance: 'Um, dude… wrong number?'

The reply was immediate, and almost caused Lance to drop his phone 

*Keith: 'Are you sure I got the wrong number Lance?'

Lance did gently put down his phone. He was now at a crossroads of how to handle this. On the one hand, he could take a chance that Keith wasn't joking (and the chances were high. Keith wasn't very good at jokes), and was seriously coming on to him. They could do something about all this tension building up between them.

On the other hand, Lance could just ignore it, play it off as a joke. And things between them would stay the same. Complicated and filled with messy emotions.

Lance picked his phone back up and stared at the picture of Keith. Maybe, it was time to start being honest with himself. Lance took a deep breath in and replied.

*Lance: 'My mistake. It's the right number.'

Lance bit his lip in anticipation as he watched the little dots at the bottom of the screen bounce as Keith typed back.

*Keith: 'Thought so. So then, about my question…'

*Lance: 'I'm in the middle of class! Can this wait till later?'

*Keith: 'You're in a boring as shit class. I know, I had the same teacher last year.'

Lance chewed his lip and peeked over the top of his laptop. The professor was too focused on his presentation, and none of his classmates around him that were still awake seemed to care. His phone vibrating in his hand brought his attention back.

*Keith: 'Well?'

Cheeky brat. Two could play at this game.

*Lance: 'Well what? Did you want me to say how nice they look on you?'

Lance waited till he saw the dots move, then quickly sent an addition.

*Lance: 'Or did you want me to say how nice they'd look on the floor?'

He grinned triumphantly as the dots stopped moving for a moment.

*Keith: 'Oh yeah, would they? And how would they get on the floor?'

Lance breathed out slowly as a blush rose to his cheeks. He could do this! It was just some sexting with a semi-friend  that he was finally admitting that he was stupidly attracted to. And he wasn't bad at dirty talking. It was just...different with Keith.

*Lance: 'If I tell you, what do I get in return?'

*Keith: 'You get to come to my dorm to finish me in person.'

Another picture was sent, and it made Lance's dick throb in anticipation. Keith was now laying in bed, the camera angled down the line of his body to show off the sizable tent between his spread legs. His free hand was resting on his belly, as if waiting for instructions.

Lance shifted in his seat. Oh yeah, he was definitely hard now, and definitely would be doing that awkward trying-to-hide-a-hardon shuffle out of class. But he was committed to this now.

*Lance: 'I'm a hands on kind of guy. So I'd start by slowly running my hands over your chest. You're all hard muscle, but I bet your skin is so soft and smooth.'

*Keith: 'Why go slow? What if I want you to be fast and get to the good stuff quickly?'

Lance snorted quietly. Keith was definitely going to be a brat.

*Lance: 'I know you have little patience, sweetheart. But this is the good stuff! I want to take my time with you, slowly unravel you and relax you. Am I gonna need to tie your hands to the headboard?'

*Keith: 'Maybe. You could probably convince me if you asked nicely.'

He raised an eyebrow over that response. That was unexpected. Something inside Lance pinged, though. He had a feeling he knew what Keith was up to.

*Lance: 'And how would I ask you nicely? Begging on my knees, looking up at you with my big blue eyes? Or flipping you over onto your belly and grinding my hard cock onto your ass through our clothes until you submit? I'm flexible, you know. Either way is good.'

A minute later another picture was sent. This one showed Keith now laying on his stomach, his ass in the air and one dark blue lust blown eye staring at the camera where it was pointed over his shoulder.

*Keith: 'The second option. Though it's pretty funny that you think you could overpower me.'

And bingo. 'I got your number now Keith.' Lance thought, grinning wickedly as his fingers flew over the screen.

*Lance: 'What's funny is that you want me to think that you don't want my thick, hard cock up your ass, owning you completely while you lay there at my mercy. You know you want me to fuck you hard and fast, take everything I've got to give. But you also know that what really gets you going is being treated like the pillow princess you're pretending you're not. You're such a little brat.'

There was no response for minutes. No picture, no dots moving. Had he gone too far? Was he wrong about Keith? Those thoughts swirled in his head until a response popped up.

*Keith: 'If I'm such a brat, maybe you'll have to gag me then too, sometime.'

Well shit.

*Keith: 'So I'm on my stomach, hands tied up. How are my shorts ending up on the floor now?'

It was official. Keith was going to be the death of Lance. He was going to die in this classroom from a lack of blood flow to his head. The one with the actual brain, not the one he was currently thinking with 

*Lance: 'I'm gonna start by laying my body over yours, and slowly grind my cock against that pretty, perky little ass of yours. Gently kiss and nip at your shoulders, maybe leave a few marks, before slowly making my way down your spine.'

*Lance: 'I bet you'd be squirming the entire time. Trying to hold back all the sounds you want to make. But they'd escape as little whines, and just urge me on.'

*Keith: 'I'd try tugging on my bindings, cause I'd wanna flip you over by then and climb on top of you.'

*Lance: 'Then I'd have to spank you enough to get you to hold still. But not hard, cause I know you want it like that.'

*Keith: 'Fuck, it wouldn't take long for me to stop. I'd want your hands back on me.'

*Lance: 'And I'd reward you for being a good boy. I'd tug your underwear down your thighs slowly, and kiss all over your ass. You know how you're always telling me to shut up?'

*Keith: 'Yeah…'

*Lance: 'Well I'd put my tongue to better use. Spread your cheeks and open you up with my tongue. Lick you all over till we're both sloppy and you're begging for me.'

Lance shifted in his chair again as his cock throbbed painfully. He looked at the time and saw that the class would be ending soon, thank fuck. He really needed to get some relief.

Lance watched as the dots started and then stopped moving a few times, yet no new message popped up. Lance grinned, biting his lip as he speculated what Keith was doing.

*Lance: 'Class is almost over. Are you preping yourself for me? Are you getting yourself nice and slick so I can slide right in as soon as I get there?'

*Keith: 'Yeah…'

Lance's grin grew wicked again.

*Lance: 'How many fingers do you have fucking yourself open?'

*Keith: 'Two. All the way.'

*Lance: 'Oh, sweetie, you're gonna need more than that in order to take me.'

*Keith: 'Bullshit.'

The sounds of shuffling and chairs scraping against the floor alerted Lance to the end of class. He quickly fired off a text before packing up his laptop.

*Lance: 'Think what you want for now, but you'll see soon enough. Class just ended, so you have about ten minutes to get yourself open. I need to be inside you as soon as I get there, so your ass better be up in the air and ready.'

With that, Lance gathered his things up, moving his laptop bag in front of his crotch. He looked down at the newest text, and tried to speed up his awkward boner waddle.

*Keith: 'Door's unlocked.' 

And a picture of Keith's naked and raised ass, with four fingers buried between his cheeks.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 262: A Fierce Bad Rabbit

Previously on BnHA: The hospital raid squad, which had two jobs consisting of (1) not letting Ujiko get away, and (2) not letting any of the Noumu break free to go ravage the countryside, impressively failed at both of these tasks (or so I assume) in a remarkably short amount of time. The EndeavorZawaMicLock squad were all occupied with having a very destructive fight in the hospital lobby, leaving my girl Miruko, Goddess of Courage and First of Her Name, to do pretty much all the heavy lifting, which, fine!! Except that Ujiko remembered that he had a bunch of High End Noumus just floating there waiting to be activated, and he was all “!!” and fucking activated them, and like five of them went after Miruko all at once and smashed her into a bunch of machinery and glass tubes, which frankly should have killed her but it didn’t because she’s a fucking boss. But now it’s just her (and Crust, who might do something too, but for now JURY’S STILL OUT) against all these guys while Ujiko speeds off to grab Tomura and abscond. So basically everything that could go wrong has already gone wrong so UH. OKAY.

Today on BnHA: Miruko kicks ass. Then she checks her watch and sees that there’s still time for her to kick more ass, so she does. Then there is still time, because this chapter is all about her kicking ass! So she kicks even more ass!! It’s great!! I have no complaints!! She decapitates a man with her thighs!! That’s a thing that really happens!! Also she loses an arm but WHO HASN’T LOST AND/OR BROKEN THEIR ARMS IN THIS SERIES, REALLY. Everyone is doing it. Somehow she manages to make it look cool because Miruko. Miruko can strangle a man with a cordless phone. She can kill two stones with one bird. Miruko makes onions cry. Death once had a near-Miruko experience. Mirukoooooooo. Anyway the chapter ends with Skeptic warning everyone at The Ol’ Villain Hotel that the heroes are coming, so basically WELCOME BACK, EVERYONE, this manga is back with a vengeance.

guys I’m gonna try to do this recap fast because I’m seeing Heroes Rising tonight at 7:30! and I’m so excited! and for those that asked, yes I do plan on doing some kind of write-up about it, though it’ll all be from memory after the fact so we’ll see how that goes. but !! I’ve waited 84 years for this ahhhhh but anyway so in the meantime let’s see what new and creative ways our heroes are finding to screw this up even more

(ETA: I did it but this thing isn’t edited for shit lol. after I get back I’ll give it a more thorough readthrough so sorry if I missed any really obvious errors! also there are probably way more exclamation points than usual which may or may not be a plus or minus.)

look at this helpful announcement

High End Noumu approaching, everyone. you have been warned. just in case you somehow failed to notice?? IT’S RIGHT THERE Y’ALL LOOK OUT

lmao FINALLY

MORE HEROES. YOU ALL CERTAINLY TOOK YOUR FUCKING TIME, but hey welcome to the party. and none of that “I don’t see how that’s a party” sassy shit either. you all know what I’m talking about so get out there and have fun

so they’re standing there all “it’s a talking Noumu!” and YEAH. that’s what I’ve been fucking trying to tell you. thank god someone finally fucking said it out loud so that hopefully the EZML squad can finally take notice of this as well. like guys. bigger fish?! get to frying!!

so now Crust is all “there are more of them ahead, Miruko’s in danger!” which, again, thanks for finally letting everyone else in on this formerly exclusive scoop there pal. ‘preciate it

I... really do not understand Crust’s quirk at all. I’m just gonna own up to it

what is this. what does “zuga” mean fx-wise. why did those scale things on his arms get so big. what are they made of. what’s happening

oh it turns out that if you scroll and read more instead of pausing for ages to ask dumb questions, the thing you were asking about might actually be explained in great detail in the very next panel

but what are they made out of though. and why “Crust”?? ah well I suppose that’s a question for someone who actually cares more than I do

by the way the quality of this scan is actually really good so far, I gotta say. we’re only two pages in, true, but they either cleaned this up really nicely, or this was a much higher-quality scan than usual. either way I am appreciative!

lol this poor Noumu is shook

what did I name you two weeks ago, again? Rusty?? anyways he’s doing his best you guys. gambare my dude, though actually you do need to die, so that’s too bad though

Crust is all “you pitiful living corpse!” with tears in his eyes because he’s dramatic! but jokes aside I do appreciate that he has compassion for these monsters who are all still basically innocent victims at the end of the day

does anyone else actually hear that funny-sounding anime narrator guy in your head nowadays when you read panels like this lol

I can hear the voice so clearly and it’s great

only ten times the strength of a normal human, guys. that’s actually not that bad. I’m only half joking lol. because obviously your average hero is going to be much stronger than a so-called “normal” person too, yes? and I’m pretty sure Miruko has the strength of like 30 humans but I may be overestimating her just slightly but am I though

oh lol I apparently did not learn my lesson about doing commentary before I’m done reading hahaha

so High Ends are on a different tier of their own above even the “high” tier. well that’s just. yeah that sounds more like the “we’re still fucked” update that I was expecting

oh wait, seriously??

are you telling me that all of the High Ends were actually cultivated from villains? so maybe not completely innocent, then? is this Horikoshi’s way of trying to make us feel marginally better about the fact that the heroes are shortly henceforth going to have to exterminate these guys with great prejudice? I mean they’re still basically slaves to Ujiko’s programming now though so that sucks

also I missed this earlier but the narration here basically just confirmed that Noumu are all made from corpses. which I kind of suspected, but the still-very-much-alive Tomura would then be a glaring contradiction to that, no? or is that why he’s so special. anyway I do appreciate that we’re getting a lot of much-awaited answers in this Noumu arc, but some of this is also just raising more questions. gotta be patient I guess

speaking of Tomura, Ujiko’s back in the Tomura room, so. I assume some absconding is soon to occur

oh shit!! so there’s another panel explaining that “artificial transplant of quirks” requires surgery and then three months of stabilization time following that. sooooo I’m pretty sure this mofo just confirmed that he gave Tomura some shiny additional new quirks, so that’s nice! that’s real fucking great! I know we were all eyeing Tomura skeptically and thinking to ourselves “this is almost just right, but needs more death”

wait, what?

“I was already dead anyway” meaning that he knows there’s no way out for him? and so he doesn’t have a secret way out of the lab?? ??? can that really be true?? our intrepid heroes actually did their job right and the villains had no contingency plan?? oh my god I am so terrified of letting my guard down lmao I still refuse to believe this at all

and is that Tomura who’s at 70% stabilization? that would seem to fit with the timeline we were given. holy shit is he unboxing him early fsdfkjalsdk are we about to go from “fucked” to “exorbitantly fucked”

and why am I strangely excited about it sob!!

HAHAHAHA OH GOD

so this is how liberty dies. with a beep

also fuck you all, now it’s at 71%?! couldn’t leave it at a nice even number for us, could you? you just had to throw that extra percent in there at the last moment to fuck with us all

anyway did you all catch how fucking ripped he was there though? like boiiii whaaaaat. clearly his abs are already at 100%

OH MY GOD

DOES NOTHING FUCKING FAZE THIS BEAUTIFUL, RULE-BREAKING MOTH

HAHAHA

RIGHT??

HOLY FUCKING MOLY

friendly reminder that Dabi was all good and ready to throw down with both Endeavor and Hawks (who were admittedly weakened by that point) that one time a while back, but then Miruko showed up and he was all “lol nope I think the fuck not” and warped out of there. Dabi, whose quirk is so powerful that its only apparent downside is the fact that it roasts him alive as well. that Dabi took one look at Miruko and decided he likes having his spine intact and fucking vamoosed, because that is the smart fucking thing to do when this girl shows up smiling at you the way that she is smiling at these Noumu now

anyway. fucking Ujiko knew he needed at least five High Ends to even stand a chance of slowing her down, is all I’m saying. y’all better respect the FUCK out of Miruko, everyone. it’s the law

anyway. so. quirk: bunny. can smash rl gud

someone needs to ask Horikoshi the fuck kind of rabbits he has been hanging out with. applied that “and more!” part pretty fucking liberally huh. WHO DID YOU SAY TRIX WERE FOR AGAIN, CHILDREN??

NOBODY THROWS MIRUKO IN THE BRIAR PATCH AND GETS AWAY WITH IT

fffwhatttttttttt

that would be our good buddy Max Rebo. so that’s definitely not an elephant trunk-like thing then. we may need a new name for you

on a side note, I never thought we’d meet another character who looks more like Katsuki than Mitsuki does, and yet every damn week Miruko is proving me wrong. goddamn she is great

lmao wait maybe that wasn’t Max at all, but Jester. because this is clearly Max over here

so Girl!Noumu is a water bender, Jester can do... something weird with his hair, and Max can do anything an elephant can do if that elephant was also powered by steam. nice

HAHAHA BUT MIRUKO IS ALL “KICK!!!”

HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK!!!

HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT. I WOULD READ AN ENTIRE MANGA OF JUST THIS LMAO THIS IS TOO MUCH ADRENALINE I CAN’T

JESTER’S WEIRD SPIKY ROCK HAIR IS SLICING HER ARM AND SHE’S ALL “THAT HURTS YOU JERK!!!!” AND GETTING READY TO FREAKING PILEDRIVE HIM I CAN’T, THOUGH!?

SDKFJLDKSJFLKJ

HER FATHER PEPPY TAUGHT HER THAT. BARREL ROLL ALL OVER THESE BITCHES!!

WHAT THE FUCK

FUCKING QUIRKS!!!! THOUGH!!!! WILLLLLLLLLD

SDKFJLAS;DHK OH MY GOD OH SHIT

real talk this is the scariest fucking quirk I’ve ever seen I was like what the fuck looking at her arm and then I saw him doing the twisty hand gesture and just. fuck. YOU’RE NOT CRIMSON RIOT AT ALL YOU’RE SOME PSYCHO TELEKINETIC BITCH AND I FUCKING HATE YOU!!

NO!!!!!

fuck fuck fuck. I’M SURE HER ARM’S GOING TO BE JUST FINE AND DANDY AFTER THIS GUYS, DON’T WORRY. THIS MANGA HAS SUCH A SERENE AND TRANQUIL HISTORY WITH ARMS. ISN’T THAT RIGHT DEKU

though on the plus side, if she does lose that arm we can count on her to somehow instantly become like 50x more attractive, which I’m pretty sure might cause the very fabric of the universe to unravel but it would be worth it

(ETA: SHE DID AND IT WAS!!)

MADAME PRESIDENT!! MY QUEEN

OH HELL YERRRRRR

fucking hell guys I’m running out of exclamation points and excited things to say here. AND SHE JUST KEEPS GOING! LIKE HER MOM THE ENERGIZER BUNNY BEFORE HER

I’M SORRY UJIKO DID YOU THINK FIVE HIGH ENDS WAS ENOUGH?! MAYBE NEXT TIME WE MAKE IT TEN, HOW ABOUT THAT. FUCK OFF

lmao holy shit I can’t stop laughingggg

well Crimson, at least you get to die happy. is she literally going to crush his face between her thighs. is this entire chapter just one big prank on me. if Miruko was the protagonist would this series have ended in the first chapter. trick question, the answer is it never would have started to begin with because she would have killed All for One years ago!! how much would it cost to hire Miruko to come kick away all of my problems for me

hello good afternoon everyone this is a real panel that really happened in this manga

I don’t even know what to say about anything anymore

sob she’s all “YEAH RIGHT” and SNAPPING HIS FUCKING NECK WITH A FUCKING TRIANGLE CHOKE, THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING, FUCKING LOOK!! AT!! THIS!!!

we’re not even gonna make it to 300 chapters. Horikoshi held off for as long as he could, but eventually Miruko couldn’t be contained any longer and he had to unleash her and she instantly went and reckt every last fucking bad guy out there until there was nothing left. who are the kids even going to fight. nobody that’s who. go back to school kids

SON OF A BITCH WHAT IS HAPPENING

THIS IS THE MOST VIOLENT THING I HAVE EVER FUCKING SEEN AND YET SOMEHOW I SWEAR I CAN HEAR ANGELS SINGING. RESPLENDENT

SOBBING!!!!

“S’POSE I SHOULD GET THIS ANNOYING THING CHECKED OUT BEFORE I BLEED TO DEATH OR SOME BULLSHIT.” WHAT AN INCONVENIENCE. JUST A FUCKING FLESH WOUND. NOBODY USES ARMS THESE DAYS ANYWAY

“IF THE ONLY WAY TO STOP YOU IS BY CRUSHING YOUR HEADS THIS WILL BE WAY EASIER THAN HOLDING BACK ON A NORMAL VILLAIN.” SOB THIS IS MIRUKO’S WORLD AND WE’RE ALL JUST BEGRUDGINGLY ALLOWED TO EXIST IN IT. MY BARONESS

DID YOU JUST TOURNIQUET YOUR DISMEMBERED FUCKING LIMB WITH YOUR OWN FUCKING HAIR ONE-HANDED FFCKCK KCKCLK JUST MIRUKO THINGS

Miruko also saw Horikoshi getting ready to end the chapter after 17 pages and was like “EXCUSE YOU THERE” and he backed off because he actually likes having a fucking head thank you very much

LMAO AND NOW OF ALL TIMES WE’RE CUTTING BACK TO THE OL’ VILLAIN RESORT. SIGH

Skeptic seems to have finally cottoned on to them being in some kind of trouble. huh

how does he know it was Jin who screwed up?? did he realize that Hawks betrayed them oh shit!?!

OOP HE’S SOUNDING THE ALARM

AND THE CHAPTER IS ENDING. BUT I’M NOT DONE SCREAMING. AHHHHHH well anyways I’m off to watch my children kick lots of ass on the big screen. assuming I can get this posted in time with zero editing whatsoever lol I’ve got like... an hour. WE SHALL SEE!

(ETA: we did it lol just barely! this whole thing is probably a giant mess but oh well! Mirukoooooo)

[malebodyinvasion]

Ron and the Wooden Sculpture - Part 1

Disclaimer:  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner.

I was extremely tired from work last week and asked my boss for a day-off. Since my performance was top notch, he gave me a week off from work. I planned to play all the games gathering dust in my online library.

I decided to get groceries myself. Normally, I just order them online and have them deliver to my doorsteps. It's been a while I had a walk from home to the supermarket and it would be a nice exercise. There were lots of shops and cafes along the way, and new ones replaced my usual hangout places. 

On my way home, there was this suspicious antique shop besides my favorite pastry shop. It was not there before. While waiting for my order, I decided to pay this antique shop a visit. There were vintage dolls, steampunk wall clocks, old-school vinyl records, and many more. The one thing that got my attention the most is this statue of a guy wearing something cultural from an ethnic group. Each part is sculptured well which captures a male body's anatomy perfectly. The curves, the edges, everything. It's like a real person turned into a piece of wood. I knew it was a wooden statue but it's turning me on harder than my morning wood. Dad jokes aside, I'm really interested.

Suddenly, the shopkeeper appeared out of nowhere. It's an old lady wearing a black cloth robe like that one of fictional games. This just adds to the weirdness of the shop.

"It's a fine work," I said as I try my best to hide the horniness between my legs.

"Indeed." She replied. "It is made from a very special tree which only grows from Asia."

"That was very informative and... and... mysterious," I stuttered. "Iz... Is it for sale?"

"Yes, that's why it's on display," the shopkeeper retorted. Stay cool there, granny. I'm just asking.

"By how much?" I asked.

"Well, it depends." She replied in a calm voice. Did she just hear my thoughts?

"It depends?"

"Since it's been a while someone decided to buy something that is not a lucky charm or a scented candle, I'll give you a discount." Then she told me the price. It's reasonable for a good quality display and it's much cheaper than those limited edition figurines I bought online.

"I'm feeling good today so I'll take it!" I said on impulse. If she only knew, the reason I'm buying this sculpture is because I'm getting pumped by just looking at it. I'll just tell my parents when they visit that I'm feeling artsy and want to support artists.

I paid her cash and she told me that her grandson will deliver the sculpture later. Her grandson, huh. I'm actually imagining that it looks like an adventurer or a mage just for consistency's sake. Sorry for being judgmental granny!

Before I leave, the old shopkeeper told me, "Let him bathe under the moonlight. Once he recover from his deep slumber, he will serve you well."

"Ah... Thank you... very much!" That was really weird. It's like one of those lines of flavor texts in video games. But honestly, I can't help to interpret it in a lewd way.

I picked up my order from the pastry shop. It smells so good and tasty. I dropped by one of the thrift stores I frequent in college and bought some clothes and a couple of bulb and socket to put near the wooden sculpture I bought earlier. I run across some of my college classmates on my way home. We exchange conversations and ended up eating lunch together.

Time passed by and I remembered that the statue will be delivered later today. I bid goodbye to my classmates and hurriedly walk. Outside the apartment building, was a truck with the statue covered with bubble wraps and a huge cloth.

"You're Ron I presume," a dude, which is likely in early 20's, asked me before pointing fingers to the statue. "My mother told me to bring this guy at this address and she perfectly describes how you look."

"Ah, yes. That's me." I answered excitedly. Wow, this dude looks exactly what I imagined, minus the weird clothing. He wears a normal T-shirt, a normal pants, and a pair of normal shoes. He is perfectly normal, different than his grandmother. His voice is kind of cute and sexy.

"Good." He remarked. "Can you stop staring at me?"

"Sorry."

"I already have an idea of what's on your mind. It's the clothes, isn't it?"

I nodded.

"My grandmother is really weird on her own way. Well, she's a... " he stopped. "Anyway, on what floor and room should I carry this statue?"

"Room 807, at 8th floor, " I answered but his face looks like he doesn't like what he just heard. "Don't worry. There's an elevator in the lobby!"

"O-okay."

He followed me to the elevator. I like to help him but I have groceries and the pastry in my arms. I can see his muscles popping up while carrying that statue. The more I look at him, the more I realize his handsome appearance.

"Let's go." I pressed the buttons and the elevator closes. It's just the two of us in this small space, well, it's three if I count the statue. I'm getting another boner thinking about it. "By the way, what's your name? I'm Ron as you already know," I bravely asked.

"Aldrin... You can call me Aldrin, yeah," he replied nervously. What's wrong with this guy and he suddenly starts shaking. I'm not a beast that will randomly jump at you. You're also weird on your own way, dude.

The elevator rang as a sign we're already on the 8th floor. I paced towards my doorstep and opened the door. "Can you put him over there, near the sofa bed?"

"Sure," then he entered my apartment. I could see him looking at my action figures on the shelves as he walked towards the bed. "You... You're quite a collector yourself."

"Ah, yes. I bought then if I feel like it," I tried to wave it off with a nervous laugh. Seeing him inside my room makes my growing member harder.

"This guy will be your first life-size. Take good care of him, yeah?" He said as he tap the statue's shoulder. I’ll take good care of the statue, of course. He may not be an action figure but I still spent some money.

"I will and thank you." I offered him a drink but he declined so I gave him some tip for helping me out. He supposed not to accept it but I insisted.

"Th... Thank you." He said as he left my room. "Ba... By the way, did my grandmother tell you anything about the statue?"

"Yes. She told something about moonbathing the statue. Is there a problem?"

"No... Nothing. I'll be going then."

"Alright. Thanks again."

I closed the door. I'm still horny, the heck. Thinking about Aldrin and looking at the statue gives me shivers down my spine. I lay down over the sofa bed and removed my pants and underwear freeing my "more harder" member. There were already signs of precum on its tip. I am in good shape, but not as good as the statue of well-defined pecs and abs or as muscular as Aldrin. I put my right hand over my chest and pinch my nipple as my left hand moved up and down my boner.

No, this is not enough. I get off my bed and stand half-naked before the wooden sculpture. I caressed its smooth hardy abs and pecs while still pounding my meat with my other hand. Due to my short stature, I raised my heels and lean towards for a kiss. I might look crazy for romancing an inanimate object but I'm enjoying it.

My body is tensing up. I could feel the build up in my dick and any moment I shall reach my climax. I lean more forward feeling the sculpture's varnished skin against my own. I feel so hot and euphoric.

"Aahhh...!" I moaned and let my imagination run wild, and streams of pure ecstasy shoots out towards the statue's legs, sliding down to its feet. "It's been a while since the last time I did this, huh. Thanks to you Mr. Statue."

I wiped off the cum with my T-shirt and wear a pair of boxer shorts. I need to put off the things I bought and prepare for dinner. I looked at the statue again and wondered what's the real meaning behind the granny said.

"I think the food can wait. I'll take a nap for now."

[shigarakis-fifth-hand]

Class of 1-A Imagine

The entire 1-A class got hit by a quirk swapping villain! It’s all randomized and I spent a bunch of time on this! Please draw what they would look like and dm me!

Lida

 - He was lucky enough to get Denki’s quirk

 - Didn't even notice for a few seconds

 - Only realized when he couldn’t run anymore

 - His engines were simply gone ~ POOF!

 - It was only when he looked at his hair and saw bright yellow

 - Immediately runs away as fast as his weak, human legs can take him

 - When they tell him what happens, he forces Kaminari to tell him how to use it

 - “I don’t know, you just... do the thing.”

 - “Well what thing because on page four of using your quirk, it says that...”

 - When Iida gets the hang of it, he doesn’t like to use it

 - He’s terrified of hurting someone, and since he isn’t experienced, he doesn’t want to go brain-dead either

Asui

 - She got Deku’s quirk

 - She doesn’t like how big her arms get

 - All Might immediately helps her since he doesn’t want her to break any bones

 - She doesn’t fully grasp the concept and chooses not to use the quirk

 - She’s seen how bad Deku can get

 - She is overjoyed at something else though

 - “My tongue Mina! Look at my tongue!”

 - Everyone finds out Asui has a beautiful singing voice

 - She’s almost sad to get her own quirk back

 - But it’s okay

 - She can’t hurt herself with her own quirk ~ribbit

 Aoyama

 - He was able to get Sero’s quirk

 - “Well you didn’t hear this from me but it’s truly unfashionable.”

 - “Look at me, the human tape dispenser of 1-A.”

 - “Ugh, I can’t even wear my fur jacket because my elbows are too thick.”

 - “Sero, how do you wear long sleeves with this thing?!”

 - Aoyama doesn’t want to use the quirk, it’s just not “flowing with his vibe”

 - He wears his fancy jackets for the entire month after the quirk wears off

( a picture of Bakugo trying to help Kirishima learn about molecules ^^^^)

Kirishima

 - He got Momo’s quirk

 - At first he’s sad, his unmanly quirk is gone for an entire week!

 - But then he realizes that he can walk around shirtless for an entire week

 - “It’s for my quirk!”

 - He likes being able to make food in an instant, he just doesn’t like it when Aizawa insists that he know the basic molecules of certain things

 - “When am I going to use this? I will never have to make an umbrella in my life!”

 - He likes to stick to food, especially liking that he can make any meal better than Bakugo

 - “Dude! I could solve world hunger from my abs!”

 - “Woah, imagine if I could make a car from my abs.”

 - “Can I make wings like Hawks?!

 - When the week ends, Kirishima is kinda disappointed 

 - But Bakugo is happy he got his cooking buddy back

Koda

 - He got Uraraka’s quirk

 - He’s super excited honestly, he likes being able to fly

 - “I feel like a feather.”

 - Ochako is happy to be able to teach him how

 - “Let’s just stay indoors. We don’t need you floating off to space.”

 - Koda almost wants to go to space

 - Once he learns how to use it, he uses all his time zooming around the dorms

 - Once Aizawa takes them outside to train, he just floats around in the air

 - Aizawa lets him

 - He knows this precious baby needs some relaxation with the clouds

 - He also likes the birds

 - He can’t speak to them though, which is frustrating for him

 - “How do you not remember me? I fed you dinner last night!”

Ojiro

 - He got Tokoyami’s quirk

 - One second his tail was there, the next second it was a mean looking bird

 - Ojiro likes taking his bird on walks, he doesn’t really know what to do with it

 - He talks to the bird sometimes, and for some reason he can understand it

 - “Dark Shadow seems too emo. Let’s try Gregory.”

 - The bird agrees 100%

 - When Ojiro is training, Gregory is too powerful sometimes

 - “How do you control your own shadow?!”

 - Training sessions with Aizawa is just one big mess for Ojiro

 - Nothing gets accomplished accept Ojiro talking to Thompson and Thompson trying to attack anyone who gets close

 - Ojiro is so excited to get his tail back, but it sad that Tokoyami won’t take the same request

 - rip Gregory

( Sato’s reaction to getting Mineta’s quirk^^ )

Sato

 - Sato has Mineta’s quirk

 - Sato doesn’t come out of his room for the entire week

 - Everyone understands

Hagakure

 - She got Sato’s quirk

 - She makes a bunch of sweets as an excuse to eat all of it

 - But that’s not a big deal at all to her

 - She’s not invisible anymore!

 - The moment she realizes that she isn’t invisible, she goes crazy

 - She’s actually kind of tan

 - Not only that but she’s gorgeous!

 - Thick brown hair, green eyes, and she’s so skinny

 - Her face alone has everyone in 1-A dropping dead

 - Some of the guys can’t believe it

 - They’ve chatted with this girl for months and had no idea

 - She wants to ask Ojiro on a date, but what happens when the quirk wears off

 - It does wear off, but nobody cares

 - They always knew she was pretty, and this just confirmed it for sure

Shoji

 - He got Hagakure’s quirk

 - What’s not to love about being invisible?

 - The strange part to him is that he can still see himself

 - All of his extra arms are gone!

 - That’s sad, all of his shirts were custom for those arms

 - He borrows clothes from his friends

 - It’s funny to see a robe and bunny slippers walking around at midnight though

Deku

 - He got Todoroki’s quirk

 - It’s okay though! He’s got his creepy notebook!

 - Todoroki gladly give him teaching on how to use it

 - “Remember, flames do damage and ice can be used to capture things.”

 - Deku knows all of this from his “research”

 - But that doesn’t stop them from spending everyday training together

 - It’s fun... and “helpful”

 - Deku loves being his own microwave and freezer

 - He accidently catches things on fire from time to time

 - He got scared by a movie and froze half the couch

 - Todoroki kissed him and he burned half his shirt off

 - “How do you control this thing?!”

Ururaka

 - She got Mina’s quirk

 - “Yay! I got acid hands! I got acid hands!”

 - Mina makes her wear oven mitts

 - She accidently burns a hole through her bed while having nightmares

 - “High five! Wait... never mind.”

 - “Mina, teach me how to do the thing!”

 - Also let’s not forget that Ochako has pink skin, horns, and alien eyes

 - “Ooh, I look so cute!”

 - Ochako spends most of her time posing in front of the mirror

 - “Look at my horns Kirishima!”

 - “Mina, look at my eyes!”

Denki

 - He got Iida’s quirk

 - Whenever he runs, he ends up going sonic on people

 - “Denki, take a lap!”

 - “I don't think you want that Mr. Aizawa.”

 - Whenever Denki tries to use Iida’s quirk, it’s always a quick fail

 - So far Denki has taken out a trash can, Present Mic, tripped on a basketball, run into a tree, faceplant into dirt, and accidently swallow a bug

 - The worst part is that Denki sleep walks

 - Running into stuff, tripping over a potted plant, falling down a flight of stairs

 - “This is better than being brain dead I guess.”

 - Denki spends most of his time making fun of Iida by waving his arms like a robot and trying on multiple pairs of glasses at once

 - Iida demands that Kaminari trains

 - “Kaminari, you will read all of these books on how to operate engine legs or else!”

 - Kaminari must admit the engine legs are cool

 - Except when Kirishima put hot dogs in them

 - The entire class room smelled like burnt meat

Jiro

 - “Cool! I look like a frog!”

 - She got Asui’s quirk

 - Her hair turned green, her tongue grew, and her pupils dialated

 - “Asui, look at this!”

 - She uses her tongue to swing off the dusty chandelier when Iida isn’t looking

 - “Ew! They should make tongue condoms!”

 - Jiro and Ochako have a blast teasing Mina and Asui

 - “Ribbit bitch! Your frog queen has arrived!”

 - Denki gets Jiro a crown to wear around the dorms

 - Ochako buys the four girls frog onesies

 - “So kawaii!”

 - Jiro never was into swimming until now

 - She likes that her fingers don’t get wrinkly

Sero

 - He got Ojiro’s quirk

 - “Dude, look at my tail!”

 - Bakugo makes fun of his “backwards dick”

 - It’s funny, but not that funny

 - In return Sero whips him with it

 - “I feel like a monkey!”

 - Sero hangs from everything he can

 - “This thing has more muscles than I do!”

 - He goes to a playground nearby with Denki and swings off the monkey bars

Tokayami

 - He got Koda’s quirk

 - “I’ve never been much about nature. Too much light, not enough darkness.”

 - Bakugo jokes that he can finally talk to his pigeon brothers

 - “Dude! The birds love you!”

 - And everyone is right

 - As soon as Tokoyami walks outside, a pigeon lands on his head

 - “Why did that pigeon just speak to me?!”

 - Tokoyami is scared of the outside now

 - “I can hear their voices still!”

 - Tokoyami has a panic attack over being able to hear the animal voices

 - “Why do ants sound so manly?”

Todoroki

 - He got Bakugo’s quirk

 - “I’m not asking that bastard for help.”

 - Instead, he goes to Deku for training

 - “Deku, you have that stalker notebook still?”

 - Bakugo’s quirk is like his own quirk

 - “Seriosuly? Just heat?”

 - “Kind of basic if you ask me.”

 - Once Bakugo hears that, he goes beserk

 - “Icyhot!”

 - “Oh no no, you can’t call me that anymore.”

 - Todoroki likes propelling himself in the air with explosions

 - Bakugo’s quirk is too loud, like his personality

 - He doesn’t like using the quirk honestly

 - “It's not very good, very violent, and I don’t like getting sweaty.”

Bakugo

 - He got Kirishima’s quirk

 - “Yea bro, you can get hard too now!”

 - Mina tries to stop him from saying that

 - Poor bby doesn't understand

 - Kirishima tries to help, but Bakugo is having no part in that

 - “How difficult can your quirk be Shitty Hair?”

 - It isn’t easy though, especially when Bakugo is forced to be shirtless.

 - He’s used to his hero outfit covering his chest

 - Bby is a little self conscious

 - The best part is that he doesn’t sweat that much

 - “Fuck yea! I don’t smell like fucking cinnamon and caramel!”

 - Bakugo does miss his explosions and hand grenades

 - Your quirk is too boring Kirishima, and it’s not loud at all

Momo

 - She got Aoyama’s quirk

 - Her immediate reaction is to read a bunch

 - “Aoyama! Wait up, I have so many questions!”

 - Next though, she has fun with it

 - “It’s so pretty!”

 - Along the way her and Aoyama become friends

 - He brings her pain releivers to help with the stomach pains

 - “It sucks but at least it’s pretty.”

Mina

 - She got Jiro’s quirk!

 - Immediately her skin isn’t pink, her horns are gone, and her eyes turn bright blue

 - She’s still as spunky as ever though

 - “Dude! Imagine all the hot gossip I can listen to!”

 - Mina tries the teacher’s lounge with Asui and Ochako, only to hear Aizawa and Present Mic planning a date night

 - “We should totally go as well!” Mina offers

 - They go on all sorts of “spy missions”

 - Mina also likes being able to tan with Momo from time to time

 - She does miss her horns though

 - She realizes quickly that Jiro’s earphone jacks are also Bluetooth

 - Jiro just never told anyone before

 - When Mina gets her quirk back, she is so happy to look “normal” again

Omg this took all day! Please comment down below your favorite combo and if I should do another one! Love you all! Stay safe! <3333

[baby-brightmonster]

Leading Man: Chapter 1

The moment you’ve all been waiting for. Just kidding no one asked for this. On with the show. 

Laughter and smoke, filled the room as they expelled from her mouth like a dragon. Maya’s friends laughed and quipped along with her. Her closest friend, Bridget found the script on an end table.  

“Oh shit you didn’t tell us you have a new job lined up,” she mentioned setting down the bong on the coffee table.

“I don’t,” she told her. “It’s just a reading, they want to hear me sing, I doubt I’ll get it,”

“Positive,” her other friend Skyla mentioned sardonically.

“No, they want me to play Lydia, of all things, I can’t play Lydia I’m too old, I’m 26 for God’s sake. There is no way I get that role,” Maya informed, not mad, not bitter at all, she just did not think she was right for it. “They even told me to just go in and read,”

“When do you go into read?”

“Like next week,”

“Who are you reading with, do you know?” Maya shook her head, and went for another hit.

“I heard it’s going to be the dude from School of Rock,” Skyla quipped looking at her phone, “How cool would that be? I mean, how many times did you see that show?”

“Literally only twice,” Maya said a little too defensively, with people the truth of the matter was that she had watched it another time by herself, she remembered him.

“Crap what was his name again?” Bridget mentioned in a tone that felt like baiting.

“Alex,” Maya and Skyla answered at the same time. Maya from memory, Skyla from her phone. She remembered him, he was magnetic, funny, wonderful voice. He was the perfect lead, she didn't stand a chance.

“...totally fucking gone! It was hilarious!” Skyla giggled while Bridget clapped and guffawed.

“Sorry, I zoned out, what happened?” Maya muttered.

“Yeah you zoned out,” Bridget quipped. “Dreaming about Alex, were you?”

“You’re so stoned right now,” Skyla commented. “I was telling Bridget about how when we see the show, you could not take your eyes off of him, the whole time, and he was on stage, the whole time.”

“Funny how that works with him being the lead.” Maya quipped. “And he was good,”

“Real good.” Skyla said lewdly. “She looked him up through the playbill,”

“Shut up,” Maya growled,

“Followed him on Twitter,”

“Shut up,”

“Wouldn’t shut the fuck up about how he was sooo talented,”

“Fuck off Sky,”

“Downloaded the soundtrack,” Sky mentioned. “After that everything was Alex, so great, so talented, she was like a twelve year old girl around him,”

“Thank you Skyla,” Maya finalized. “Great, I’m totally not nervous, or anything?” They gently ribbed her a while, joking about how she would be doodling “I heart AB” in her algebra book, they continued to drink, and their night went on after they mercifully, moved on from the topics.

A week passed, and then it was time for the reading. Maya came in with her bag, with her sides, her heels clicking on the hard tile, In the mean time, she had signed up to dance in a music video, so despite her aching feet, she still dressed up a little. She liked to look nice wherever she went, blaming the Old Guinea mentality she had grown up with, always look good when you leave the house. Her black lace dress and heels were par for the course, the red lips were just a trademark. She looked more like Morticia Addams than Lydia Deetz. Plus one look at the wispy little teenagers that she walked past showed that she was just there for the reading to show some little girl how it was really done. Nevertheless, she liked the show she thought it was funny, and heartwarming she would have loved to have been a part of it.

“The idea that I want to do here, is I want to convey that it’s manipulative, but still kind of, charming you know?” The director tried to explain using hand gestures. “Think big bad wolf,”

“That’s a great idea yeah,” he responded bent over the script. The directors head perked up at the sound of her heels.

“There she is! Thanks so much for coming Maya,” Timbers greeted as he walked up to her and grinned, she shook his hand, not a hugger.

“Of course, happy to help,” she responded flashing a smile.

“You know, Alex?” Timbers asked good-naturedly, they made eye contact and her stomach did flips. His eyes looked like a glass of whiskey held up to the light, then he smiled at her, and she melted.

“No, I have never had the,” do not say it Maya, “pleasure,” oh god, Alex shook her hand.

“Hey, nice to meet you,” he greeted, And when he said ‘hi’ I forgot my damn name…

“Likewise,” Maya replied brightly.”I’m Maya, I’m here to make you feel tall,”  He chuckled, sending an army of butterflies all over Maya’s body.  

Don’t look at her dress, or her lips,  he chided himself. He did not want to be the asshole in this case, he did not know how old she was, that she was in a few shows, quite a few shoes, as he found out later. She had been on one stage or another since she was ten years old. She cut her teeth with dancing. As shown by her legs. Timbers had told him so, triple threat, and she wrote. The director had told Alex it was between the dancer, Maya, he corrected himself and Sophia who was admittedly younger. He and Sophia had sang together in the first test, and he was rooting for her, Maya sat around with her long, shapely, legs crossed gushing to Leslie about how she loved her in a film she saw a few years back. Stop looking at her legs, he reminded himself, keeping his eyes glued to his notes. Okay, okay, its fine, I’m married not blind, he rationalized. She’s a pretty girl, that’s it. Timbers told them to get started, having Maya go first.  

“Look babes,” he said using this gruff voice that he wanted to do for the show. Maya tensed,  he carried on. “we can help out each other, you don’t like your dad, I don’t like my mom, she doesn't get me,” she was so - taken with him. 'This is A problem' she decided, the other girl's faces were captivated. They could not wait to sing with him, the youngest was bouncing and joking along an endearing way, Mays smiled back, she reminded her of her own little Sister. If the role would not go to Maya, she hoped this kid got it. Maya tried her best not to laugh, it was just a reading.

“You could use a buddy,” he sang in the voice, at that cadence it was less funny, “don’t you want a pal?” He slid over to her, feeding off the laughter in the room. “Yes, I do, yes I do,” sneaking an arm around her. Oh, fuck he smells good, she thought with the utmost dread. She miraculously, got every cue, thanking God that the script was in front of her as she doubted she could remember anything right now.

“Okay, what’s your name?” Maya sang getting into it, Alex, then snapped his eyes up and down her body and walked closer to her.

“What’s my name?” He questioned, never breaking eye contact tilting her face towards him. “I’m the best you’ll ever get, girl,” she cleared her throat stepping away from him.

“B-be a doll and spare the lecture,” she sang back getting herself together.

I am so screwed, Maya thought. If I have to work with this guy it’s going to get real messy, the song went on, with Alex begging her to “free him” dropping to his knee in front of her and grabbing her hips, with a wink to show he was just messing with her. She hoped she was not as obvious as she felt, her hands were trembling and her heart felt like it was going to burst out of her chest.

“Beetlejuice,” she said, her hand without consulting her brain, ran itself through his hair. He got up to his feet, his hands still on her hips.

“Yes,” he husked, and that growl that he did, got her right where it counts. The heels put her at his eye level which made it easier for him to look at her, with a sneaky little smirk that knocked the wind right out of her.

“Beetlejuice,” she breathed. Great idea, she thought. I’ll play too, she snaked her hand up his neck to his face, brushing her fingertips behind his ear. He squeezed her arm, a cough from one of the girls brought Maya back to reality.

“Yes….” He cocked an eyebrow his smirk going to a grin.

“Beee,” she sang running her hands up his chest smoothing over his shoulders. She then comically, pushed him away. Along with the guilt she felt. He’s taken. “Cause! You’re so smart a stand up role, I’ll think about your offer let you know, but I should take my chances down below.” He straightened up and smiled at her, a genuine smile out of character, Maya fixed her gaze on the book in front of her, she would need a cold shower after this. Just in case he could not push it any further, the grunts he made in the next verse. “Okay, Beetlejuice,” moan, “Beetlejuice,” a whimper. “Being young and female doesn’t mean that I am an easy mark,” the petulant growl he gave her was enough to send her off the edge. As she sang her solo part, Alex stood back with his arms crossed over his chest smiling at her tapping his foot to the piano music. Mercifully, the song ended and Maya thought she would faint.

“Ok let’s take a small break,” Timbers mentioned. “Anyone need some water,”

“Maybe a cigarette,” Rob McClure joked, causing Alex to shoot him a look. “What?”

“Yeah, I, um,” Maya stammered. “Need to make a call.” She all but ran out of the room.  

“Brightman, a word,” his agent said charging towards the door. He was about confront Rob about what the hell he meant by that cigarette comment but followed the other man anyway. The door shut and they sat in the hallway. “What the fuck was that?”

“What? She did great,” he argued. “Good voice, and they said they wanted someone who could dance, so,”

“‘What’ you know damn well ‘what’, half the people in there were expecting you to rip her dress off, when you called her ‘Baby’ I thought she was going to blow you,” he ranted.

“I’m supposed to be creepy,” Alex tried to defend, the truth of the matter is, he did not even know, she just drew him in, and maybe it was because she was older that he thought he could get a little raunchier with the song. Yeah, no one is going to buy that. He was an idiot, her manager had mentioned she was so excited to work with him and he acted like, well, a creepy old guy.

“That wasn’t creepy,” the other man argued. “That was you picking her up, which circles back to my original point - what the fuck dude?!”

“I,” he tried, just dropping any pretense. “I’ll go talk to her.”

“Good talk her out of suing,”

“Were you there?” He barked. “She was into it, I felt how she grabbed my hair, how she touched my chest,”

“She’s an actress that’s her job dumb ass,” he bit back. “Look. I don't care who you do, frankly you can take her doggy style in the bathroom for all it matters to me, just don’t let anyone see you, you can’t get mixed up with that bitch,”

“The fuck does that mean?”

“Don’t defend her honor,” he said sarcastically.  “The next one is fifteen try not to grope her too,”

“Fuck off man,” Alex grumbled as he went to go find Maya. Sure enough she was on the phone, speaking rapidly in what sounded like Spanish? She was laughing, so that was a good sign. When she spoke slower he registered it as Italian. God, it sounded beautiful coming from her. She caught his gaze and smiled, hurrying whomever it was off the phone.

“Hey,” she said brightly. She put her phone away, in her dress as she folded her hands formally in front of him.

“Hi,” he replied. “Oh, your dress, has pockets?” She chuckled.

“Yes, it does,” she answered giving him a kind smile. Get it together, he scolded himself. He must have been silent for too long because she followed it up with, “I can give you the name where I go it,” he chuckled and shook his head.

“I just, I wanted to say sorry, I think I went pretty overboard in there,”

“Oh, no,” she told him, “That back there? Please! I once had to tango with a guy who actually cupped my peesh in front of a live audience, which included my parents,” Alex laughed, oh hell, he thought. she’s funny.  “I would have done something if you had really crossed a line, you’re okay,”  

[colbybrocksmolder]

Arizona – Colby Brock x Reader PART 3/3 [BLURB]

[PART 1] [PART 2]

“MIKE!” Colby yelled from his room where he was currently setting up for the video.

“Yessir!” Mike popped his head in the door.

“I want the thumbnail to be you putting me in a headlock.” Colby laughed.

Mike popped his knuckles, walking towards Colby. “It would be my pleasure.” He’d put on a serious voice.

“Oh, shit. Never mind.” Colby leaned away from Mike, laughing.

“You two are ridiculous.” You laughed from the doorway.

Mike glanced at the camera to make sure the red recording light was on and tackled Colby onto the bed, pulling him into a headlock. “Don’t lie. You love us.” Your brother laughed, Colby flipping him over.

“Yeah, well…you can’t pick who you love.” You said in a dramatic sigh.

Colby looked over at you with a shocked look on his face giving Mike the chance to pull him into another hold. The two boys wrestled around for a few minutes before almost knocking the camera over. “Oh, shit!” Colby dashed to catch the falling tripod. “I’m pretty sure there’s a thumbnail somewhere in there.” He laughed, setting the camera straight.

“That whole thing needs to be at the end of your video.” Mike laughed, straightening his clothes.

“Oh, 100%.” Colby agreed, looking over at you. “Are you nervous?” he asked, sitting back down on the bed.

“Just because I don’t normally do this.” You said, pointing to the camera. “But not because of what we’re going to say.”

Colby nodded, understanding. “That makes sense. I wouldn’t worry about it too much, though. I think you’re going to be a natural.” He smiled, looking over at Mike who was settling down next to him. “You ready?”

“Very.” Mike smirked.

*GIRLFRIEND TAG! (not clickbait) [SERIOUSLY – this isn’t clickbait]*

The video opened with Mike and Colby sitting next to each other on the edge of Colby’s bed. They stayed silent just staring at the camera for a few seconds. Mike looked mad and Colby looked scared.

“Coooolllbyyyyy?” Mike said in a scolding voice, staring into the camera.

Colby’s eyes widened. “Yeah?”

“What did you do?” Mike looked over at him.

“I…I uh, I asked a girl out…” he said, acting like he was afraid to answer.

“What girl, Colby?” Mike pressed, crossing his arms and flexing.

“Umm…Her name is Y/n.” Colby answered, making sure to look anywhere but Mike or the camera.

“And how did you meet Y/n?” Mike started leaning over Colby in an intimidating manner.

“In Arizona?” Colby ducked, shrinking away from Mike.

“And who is she?” Mike asked, turning to stare back into the lens.

Colby turned to look up at Mike, squeezing his eyes shut before answering. “Your sister.”

Mike threw his arms up and yelled in an excited voice. “Colby and my sister are dating!”

Colby busted out laughing, clapping and falling back on the bed for a second. He sat back up. “I know you’re like the goofiest dude I know, but you can still be so scary.” Colby laughed.

“It runs in the family.” Mike snarked, looking over at where you were standing off camera.

“I am not scary!” you answered, Colby making a ‘really?’ face at you before turning back to Mike. “So, is there anything you want to say before I bring Y/n in?”

“Umm…welcome to the family?” Mike teased, half tackling Colby to the bed in a hug. “But seriously” he said, turning to the camera. “All of the Sam and Colby fans welcomed me into the Trap House friend group with open arms. Hell, the reason I’ve been able to keep making music and quit my day job is because of the same people watching this video. Y/n’s been my rock since we were little kids. She’s literally the best person I know and seeing these two together, you’re gonna get it. It’ll make sense. Just give her a chance.” He nodded, looking over at Colby.

“Thanks, brother.” Colby said, hugging him before Mike stood and pushed you towards where he was just sitting. “Here she is.” Colby was laughing looking at the terrified look on your face. He grabbed your hand and pulled you to sit next to him, his arm around your waist from behind.

You sat down and covered your cheeks with your hands for a second, gaining some composure. “Okay. I got this. We’re good.” You smiled over at him, closing your eyes when he leaned in to kiss your cheek.

“Yes, ladies and gentlemen. This is not clickbait. I’m no longer a single, lonely, emo boy.” He joked, looking over at you. “Like you heard in our little opening skit, this is Mike’s sister, Y/n.”

You waved to the camera. “Hola.” You looked back over at Colby seeing him staring back at you. “Oh, God. We’re so awkward.” You laughed.

Colby shrugged. “That’s okay.” He said, leaning in to kiss you. He turned back to the camera. “OKAY! I tweeted out earlier to you guys asking for girlfriend/boyfriend tag questions and we’re going to answer a few of them.”

“What’s the first one?” you asked, looking down at his phone. “Ooo, that’s a good one. It says, ‘Where and when was our first kiss?’”

“MIKE!” Colby yelled, laughing. “We need you one more time.”

“What’s up?” Mike said, ducking down into frame.

Colby held his phone up so Mike could read the question, laughing at the dramatic face he made. “This bitch kissed my own sister in front of me before even telling me he liked her!”

“You act like that was the dramatic part.” You laughed. “Mike jumped over my kitchen island, chased Colby around my dining room, out the back door, and then tackled him into the pool.” You explained to the camera.

“He wasn’t actually mad.” Colby clarified. “He kind of played match maker, actually. I found out later he literally invited me to see if we’d hit it off.”

“Sneaky bitch.” You said, sticking your tongue out a Mike.

“I’ll take that as a ‘thank you’”, Mike laughed, going back to the living room.

“Our first kiss was actually kind of cute, though.” You turned to Colby.

“It was.” He agreed. “I was terrified to kiss her, but I told her I really wanted to. She started listing all of the reasons It wasn’t worth it INCLUDING the fact that Mike was literally staring at us.”

“He surprised me.” You said, fixing a stray section of his hair. “He looked like he was going to walk away, but then I heard him say ‘it’s worth it’…he tasted like Jack Daniels.”

Colby blushed. “It was definitely worth it.” He said, looking back down at his phone. “Okay, next question…What were your first impressions of each other? You go first.”

“Mine is kind of in two parts. Mike had talked about you before I actually met you.” You explained, turning to the camera. “I knew that he was a good friend, laid back, a good listener. My brother was very grateful for Colby. Mike and I talk a lot, so I heard about it.”

Colby smiled over at you. “What’s the other part?”

“The phone call in the car. You said ‘my momma taught me better than that’ and I kind of melted a little. It was adorable.” You blushed, ducking your head for a moment.

“She called me country boy all week.” Colby said to the camera. “I guess my first impression started with the phone call, too. You sassed Mike and called me sweetie, I think.” He laughed. “but honestly, it was seeing how you took care of everyone the next few days that solidified it. I thought you were very…” He looked around, trying to find the right word in his head. “You made me feel very comfortable.”

“I’m glad.” You rested your hand on his leg, squeezing his knee.

“You pick the next question.” He said, covering your hand with his.

“Hmmm…Okay, here. ‘When did each of you know you actually liked the other?’” you read.

“Easy.” He said, turning to the camera. “I had a little crush on her from the moment I met her…but what made me realize I was in deep was the night I drunkenly stumbled into her like, art studio area. I was not having a good night and she made me sit down and talk. Actually…” he stood and walked over to where the necklace you had made him was hanging, grabbing it and joining you back on the bed. “She made me this that night. I was just super in my own head and I felt dumb for being so upset about some stuff I was dealing with and she just… She was so loving and genuine. And she actually listened. She made me feel like my frustrations were valid and that I deserved better.” He shrugged. “It ended up being the best night of the whole trip.” He smiled over at you.

You tried inconspicuously wiping the tears that threatened to fall at any moment, but when Colby saw your watery eyes, he pulled you to him. “You’re not allowed to put me crying in the video.” You laughed, taking a deep breath and making sure your tears were gone.

“Oh, it’s going in there.” He laughed, wiping his thumb over a spot you missed.

“Brat.” You smiled at him, turning towards the camera. “I definitely fell for him that same night.” You nodded your head in agreement. “We had a good long talk while I made that necklace. I didn’t think he’d ever actually want to date me, but I was happy I had met him.” You looked over at the soft smile on Colby’s face. “You’ve got a good heart.”

“This video started out funny and now it’s just cute and gooey.” He laughed.

“Pick the next question.” You said, laughing.

“Here’s an easy one.” He said. “How long have you known each other?”

“Three weeks? Almost four?” you said, raising your eyebrow in question.

“Holy shit. Yeah. It feels like so much longer.�� Colby laughed.

“It does.” You agreed. “Okay, this one is cute. ‘What are your nicknames for each other?’”

Colby lifted his finger to point at the space on the screen where he would put a screenshot of his tweet. “She calls me Kansas.”

“I do.” You smiled. “And country boy, sometimes. I don’t think you have one for me, though.” You said, trying to think of one.

“Not really. I always answer the phone with ‘hey beautiful’, but I don’t know if that counts.” He agreed. “I have her as Mamacita in my phone.” Colby laughed.

You laughed. “Hearing you try to pronounce any Spanish word makes me laugh.” You said, handing him his phone so he could find another question.

The two of you answered a few more questions, sharing a few more funny moments and a few squishy ones.

“I think that about wraps this up.” Colby said, pulling you to lean into his side. “I know that a lot of you guys are going to be confused when you realize this video really isn’t clickbait.” He laughed. “You guys know that I’ve never introduced a girl as anything more than a friend, so this is new territory for all of us. I just…I want you guys to know that I’m really happy. If I didn’t actually think that this was real and going to last, then I never would have made this video.” He looked down at you. “Anything you want to add?”

“I don’t really know what to say.” You laughed. “I guess I want them to know that I love you. And that I understand that I’m this new scary stranger to them.”

“Guys, that’s the second time she’s said she loves me today.” He teased you, talking to the camera. You hid your face behind your hands. “I love you, too.” He said, kissing your forehead.

“I didn’t even think about it.” You laughed, leaning up to kiss his lips. “I guess it just felt right.”

“It does, doesn’t it?” he nodded, turning back to the camera. “Guys, if there are any videos you want to see us do together, let us know in the comments. I know you don’t know her very well right now, but the more you do the more I know you’re going to love her. I think we’re going to end this here, but make sure to check out Sam’s video tomorrow! We played a game during Pizza Night and Y/n surprised me. It was really cute and I know you guys are going to gif the hell out of it.” He laughed. “I’ll catch you guys later. Peace!”  

*video end*

[vitanes]

say it’s okay when it’s not

chapter 13: love letter

Lucas doesn’t have a crush on anyone, Eliott paints the mural and something is really wrong but Lucas can’t figure out what.

(a/n: i passed all my exams! n im back! enjoy! tw: mental health issues)

“Okay, but what do you think about this one? Isn’t he cute?” Mika asks, shoving his phone in front of Lucas’ face.

They are sprawled out on the couch and Mika is half-lying on top of Lucas, entertaining himself with some dating app while Lucas is trying to focus on whatever is playing on the TV. It’s needless to say he’s unsuccessful.

He sighs and glances at the screen. There’s a smiling guy looking back at him, wearing a snapback backwards and flexing his muscles. Shirtless.

Lucas looks sceptically at Mika and raises an eyebrow at him.

“He’s okay, I guess. I didn’t know you were into frat boys,” Lucas says, letting his eyes wander back to the TV.

“Have you seen those abs? I’m easy. Besides, he liked me first. I thrive off flattery,” Mika replies cockily, a smirk audible in his voice. He shifts a couple of centimetres up, digging his elbow into Lucas’ side in the process. It takes all of Lucas’ willpower not to push him off.

He groans. “What an attention whore.”

“Just a Leo,” Mika says with a snort. Lucas rolls his eyes but doesn’t say anything. He thinks the discussion is over and gets back to the movie just for Mika to poke him in the cheek. He glares at him.

“What.”

“Why don’t you set up an account somewhere?” Mika asks with excitement in his eyes.

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe because apps like that aren’t for minors? And call me old-fashioned but I’d rather not meet someone online.” Lucas is a romantic at heart and there’s nothing more like simply wanting to meet eyes with a boy and instantly knowing it’s the one. It’s more magical than asking some strangers for hook-ups on the Internet.

Mika eyes him with pity and pats the top of Lucas’ head. “I wish it was that simple,” he murmurs and goes back to his phone, this time with much more serious expression.

He’s probably thinking that Lucas is naïve and perhaps he’s right, but Lucas is pretty sure he’s allowed to be when he’s still a kid. Something in the way Mika’s eyebrows are drawn together tells Lucas that he knows it, too.

Lucas watches him for a good minute, digging his fingers into the cushions of the couch. They’ve never talked about this stuff without having it written off as a joke, but Lucas is curious. He doesn’t know that much about Mika, although a part of him wants to.

“Hey… have you ever been in love?” he asks. With how closely Lucas is watching Mika, he notices the exact second he stops in his tracks for a moment, caught off guard by Lucas’ question.

Eventually, he quietly replies, “Yeah. Once.”

“How did it end?”

“Badly.” Mika looks up at Lucas, sending his way a sad smile. “Not sure I’ll ever get over it, but,” he shrugs one shoulder, “life goes on. Can’t move forward if I keep being stuck in the past, can I?” There’s something really raw and honest on Mika’s face. It’s the first time Lucas is seeing him like this and he wants to say something, catch this moment and hold it for a while, but Mika has different plans. The lines on his face smoothen out and this split second of vulnerability is gone before Lucas can even process it. “Guess who’s got a date tomorrow,” Mika changes the topic. He winks at Lucas and looks back at his phone.

He seems carefree, but Lucas can feel that the tension still hasn’t left his body. Lucas idly wonders how lonely and hurt Mika must be. It’s a bit tragic and contradictory, given his personality. Lucas hopes the same won’t happen to him.

“By the way, what about you?” Mika asks, this time not glancing away from his phone, already engrossed in the guy he’s talking to.

“What about me?” Lucas replies, confused.

“Any crushes?” Mika wiggles his eyebrows teasingly.

“No, there’s no one,” Lucas says just as his own phone vibrates. He pulls it out of his pocket and unlocks the screen. He smiles under his nose, his fingers already tapping out a reply.

“Who’s that?” Lucas can feel Mika’s eyes on the side of his face, but this time it’s him who doesn’t look up.

“Eliott,” he says, biting down on his bottom lip when Eliott sends out another message.

Mika makes a weird noise next to him. “Okaaay,” he draws out, uncertain, but Lucas pays him no mind.

 ***

 The mural is standing big and proud before Lucas’ eyes, but he can’t believe in what he’s seeing. Neither can any of them, really, although Lucas’ case is special.

It was a usual Monday morning. They all met up before school, noting Eliott’s absence but being already used to it. They didn’t think anything of it aside from a bit of concern. Then, Emma texted Yann to quickly come to the common room. It’s needless to say they weren’t very excited about it, given the circumstances, but eventually, they went there. What met them once they arrived, was rather unexpected. And still is.

Eliott has painted the whole mural.

“W–when have you done it?” Arthur stutters out in disbelief.

“Today morning,” Eliott replies simply, threading his fingers through his hair. There’s paint all over him, whole mixes of colours creating galaxies over his skin. Despite that, Lucas can’t look away from the painting.

“It’s eight in the morning,” Basile states dumbly.

“I came here after four,” Eliott says like it’s nothing.

“Wait, you broke in?” Imane asks cautiously. There’s something in her voice that Lucas can’t put a name to.

Eliott snorts. “No, I told the night guard that it’s for the project and he let me in,” Eliott explains as if the mere idea of him breaking in was absurd.

“Just like that?” Alexia asks doubtfully.

There’s a pause and then, “Took me some begging, but yeah.” He sounds sheepish.

“How did you manage to make it look like that? It should take you much longer,” Yann says in awe.

“I was suddenly really inspired.”

Lucas has barely blinked ever since he walked in. He hasn’t said anything either. He’s not sure he will be able to utter anything coherent. Eliott told him about some surprise over the texts, but Lucas sure as fuck didn’t suspect something like that.

There are crazy splashes of colours all over the place, but in the centre are two silhouettes, painted in black, clearly dancing, holding onto one another, one of them hiding their face in the other’s neck. Lucas gulps when his eyes fall on the words scribbled around the dancers.

 In case you ever foolishly forget: I am never not thinking of you.

 Lucas can’t take his eyes off it because he knows how easy to read he’d be then.

Despite the chaotic colours surrounding the two characters, they are shielding each other. It feels personal, private. Lucas wants to reach out and trace the lines of the taller silhouette, but he can’t since the paint is still wet. The longer he looks at the exact moment Eliott has confessed to him, the more out of breath he is.

Eliott has painted him a love letter for everyone to see and Lucas doesn’t know what to think about it.

Eliott said he didn’t expect anything from him, but does it still stand? Is it just a selfless expression of his feelings? Then why use that quote? Why expose such an intimate moment between them?

Someone taps him on the shoulder, startling him and he flinches. He looks to the side and Eliott is right there, looking anxiously everywhere but at Lucas and having this expectant glint in his eyes.

Lucas briefly glances at others, who are still admiring the painting, and then back at Eliott.

“Do you like it?” Eliott asks, finally looking up at Lucas. They both know what it means, this whole mural, but neither of them is ready to acknowledge it. Lucas because he has no idea what to say about it while Eliott is probably too shy.

“Yeah, it’s beautiful. But…” he lowers his voice, leaning closer to Eliott, “…I thought that you didn’t want. Because of, you know.” Lucas nods subtly towards Daphne.

Eliott scratches the side of his neck awkwardly. “I didn’t do it for her,” he says, staring at Lucas meaningfully. The implication of his words makes Lucas speechless.

Thank God, he’s saved from replying by Arthur coming up to them and throwing his arms around their shoulders. Coincidentally bringing them pretty close together.

“Wow, it’s amazing, dude,” he says, grinning.

Yeah, Lucas thinks, it really is.

 ***

 Lucas is pretty lost. He’s got no idea how to act around Eliott after what he’s done. He can’t confront him about it, but he also can’t forget. Eliott’s feelings are out in the open, almost in Lucas’ hands and he doesn’t want to accidentally hurt him. Lucas has already had enough on his plate, mostly focusing on finding the blackmailer. But now, he can’t stop thinking about the painting. It’s been two days and it’s almost the only thing on his mind.

Eliott must have sensed something is up because he’s been more tentative around Lucas. Maybe he’s only now realising how grand his gesture was. How they can’t simply brush it off like they did with his confession.

Or maybe it’s all in Lucas’ head. Perhaps it’s only him mulling it over endlessly while everyone else has already moved on.

Arthur snapped a picture of the mural, in case someone decided to paint over it. Lucas has saved it.

And maybe that’s the issue. Because it’s for him, it was painted for him and belongs to him, but everyone else can look at it. Maybe that bothers him more than Eliott going out of his way to remind him about his feelings. It’s the fact it was supposed to be theirs. The moment of the confession, the time it was Eliott who was vulnerable and clinging onto Lucas and not the other way around. In a way, it brought them even closer than they were before. It was an important moment for both of them, but while Lucas would rather keep it deep within himself, Eliott is an artist, ready to let the whole world know.

It could also be the fact no one has ever thought of Lucas like that, done such a thing. He’s always thinking of himself lowly and there Eliott is, making him feel big. It’s a bit scary and confusing. This whole situation is like that. Lucas isn’t used to it. He’s a bit overwhelmed. He’s pretty sure that if Eliott had painted this on a small canvas and gave it to him, he wouldn’t be gnawing on it as much now. As it is at the moment, all Lucas wants to do is hide between his sheets.

The funny thing is that he shouldn’t feel that embarrassed by the fact other people can see the mural. They don’t know that it’s about Eliott and him. No one probably even suspects it because they never gave people the reason to think otherwise. But the sole fact that Lucas knows is enough for him to blush each time he passes the common room.

Besides, people aren’t stupid. Sure, they may not connect anything to him. Figuring out Eliott has someone he painted it for, though, is inevitable. Lucas doesn’t really want people to bother him about it.

On the other hand, Eliott must have taken that into account and he still decided to make it.

God, Lucas’ head is a mess. Complete mess. He doesn’t have time to dwell on this teenage angst, there are more concerning matters in his life.

He’s been trying to find a lead on the blackmailer without actually talking to Daphne(or Imane for that matter) for the past week. He put so much effort into going through people’s social media, spending sleepless nights in hopes he would find the answers. He hasn’t been sure what exactly he was looking for; a picture, maybe, where Daphne is with someone sketchy. But no matter how deep he’s been digging, there was nothing.

When he was at the police station he talked about this and yeah, it’s a crime that someone could be punished for, but they’ve found out the number that sent the messages was bought, generated. The case was still registered, but they can’t do anything. They asked Lucas all kinds of questions, like if he had some enemies or whether he knew someone who could benefit from this situation, but his mind was completely blank. Devoid of suspects.

He wants revenge and justice and yet, he’s pretty sure he reached the dead-end. His gut is telling him to give up and finally focus on school, but his resolve is making him want to fight more.

In the grand scheme of things, this problem seems much more engaging that Eliott and his mural. Try telling it to a sixteen-year-old and his brain, though.

God, when will Lucas get some rest?

 ***

 Lucas hasn’t been avoiding Imane, per se, but he’s been trying not to be with her alone ever since he asked her about Daphne. He can’t really avoid her anyway, no matter how hard he tries they do have a class together and share a desk. Much to Lucas’ surprise, though, Imane doesn’t try to corner him as soon as he sits down. That’s what he expected, given how every time they were in the same room she’d send him questioning looks. But now she only glances up at him and greets him before going back to her textbook.

It’s almost unnerving and so not like her to give up on finding the truth. Unless she forgot or decided it wasn’t worth her time. She, after all, is the one who has her priorities straight and unlike other people, she doesn’t push when she realises it won’t get her anywhere.

Lucas is almost disappointed. Not because he wanted to be bugged about his business, but because of how he tried to stay away from Imane and was dreading their shared class for the past few days, despite the fact he enjoys it. In the end it was all for nothing. At least that’s the conclusion he reaches as he starts taking books out of his backpack.

“I know,” Imane says ominously and Lucas looks at her, frowning.

“Hm?”

“Daphne told me,” Imane explains, her tone pinched. Her eyes are glued to her notebook when she says the next words, “I’d expect a lot from her, but not this, you know? She started crying while telling me and I had no idea what to say because I couldn’t feel any sympathy for her. Does it make sense?” Imane asks, meeting Lucas’ eyes. She seems apologetic even if none of this is her fault.

“Yeah, it does,” Lucas replies.

“And she only told me. I don’t know why.”

“I’m sorry she put you in this position.” Quite fucked up that Daphne just can’t tell everyone and let them make their decision, but only bothered with him and Imane, having them be left with this dilemma.

“She trusted me with this, but it’s so,” she shakes her head. “I can’t really act around her like before. And I feel responsible in a way. Because she’s my friend.” Imane puts a hand over her forehead and closes her eyes, visibly frustrated.

“But you aren’t her babysitter,” Lucas counters.

“Yeah, but if I was with her back then I could’ve stopped her. I was sober, she wasn’t.”

It’s good that the teacher still hasn’t come, otherwise, their conversation would have been cut short. Considering that Imane feels guilty, Lucas needs to prove to her that she hasn’t done anything wrong.

“But she isn’t five and if she can’t act normally when drunk, she shouldn’t go near alcohol. You have nothing to be sorry for. It’s just fucking shitty she expects you to pick a side now,” Lucas says, curling his fingers up into fists. God, he’s angry again. Why can’t Daphne be decent for like five minutes?

“I asked her to tell the girls but I don’t know. I hope that she will try to do better in the future,” Imane says and sighs deeply. Yeah, one can only wait for Daphne to grow, learn a lesson. Lucas just wishes it didn’t have to happen with him being fucked over in the process.

“We will see,” Lucas comments, pursing his lips. Imane peeks an eye open.

“I know it’s not much but I’ve been thinking about it a lot and the only thing I could remember was that some guy called me from Daphne’s phone, asking me to pick her up. He could have been the one to steal the pictures. She was alone when I got to her,” Imane says and Lucas can feel the blood rushing in his ears. She’s right it’s not much, but it’s more than he’s ever gotten. If only Daphne hadn’t been so wasted, he could ask her if she remembered something. Fuck.

“She didn’t tell you if it was someone random or a friend?” Lucas asks, fiddling with the hem of his sleeve.

“No. She was nearly passed out when I found her. I doubt she’d even remember she asked someone to call. Could be anyone. Sorry that I can’t help more,” Imane says, glancing down in resignation.

“It’s okay,” Lucas replies just as the teacher walks into the classroom.

The whole situation is messed up but Imane is the last person Lucas would even consider blaming. He tells her just as much when the class is finished and she hugs him so tightly he’s pretty sure his ribs would be broken if she put any more strength into it.

 ***

 It’s the middle of the night and Lucas knows it only because his phone is persistently buzzing, waking him up in the process. He blindly reaches out for the device and blinks a couple of times, the light hurting his eyes. The first thing he notices is that it’s after 3 AM and the second – it’s Eliott calling him. Lucas frowns. Odd.

“’ello?” he answers, barely containing a yawn.

“Did I wake you?” Eliott asks. His voice seems muffled.

“I mean… it’s pretty late.” Lucas rubs a hand over his eyes and lies on his back. “Somethin’ happen?”

“Just wanted to hear you. I was actually thinking I could visit you, but decided against it. What would Mika say if I stayed the night, right?” Eliott jokes and gets a snort our of Lucas.

“It’s flattering, but you’re gonna hear me tomorrow,” Lucas says dumbly.

“Yeah, but I just had to. Sorry.”

“’s okay,” Lucas slurs. “You got me worried,” he explains, sighing.

“I can’t turn my brain off, my ex has been an ass about it. I thought that maybe you could help a little,” Eliott says quietly, especially the last part, almost as if he didn’t want Lucas to hear it.

Lucas ignores the whole ex thing and focuses on the rest. Insomnia? Lucas has some experience with that. There’s nothing quite like the chaos in your head and feeling like a living corpse during the day because you haven’t slept properly in days.

“How can I help?” Lucas offers.

“I don’t know. It’s always peaceful with you. Maybe I just don’t want to be alone when I’m like this.”

How can Eliott say things like that and expect Lucas to ignore it?

Lucas clears his throat. “Like what? You can’t sleep, it’s okay, remember it’s not the end of the world even if it feels like it,” Lucas says, hoping it will calm Eliott down.

Eliott lets out a bitter chuckle. “Yeah. I just have a lot of energy, I guess. I think I’ll go for a run.”

Lucas arches an eyebrow at that. Who would go for a run so late? He can’t imagine doing that no matter how restless he’d be. But each to their own, he supposes.

“’kay. Sorry for not being the best help,” Lucas says, genuinely apologetic.

“You are the best. Period. Okay, sleep well. See you later,” Eliott says and without waiting for Lucas to reply, he hangs up.

Lucas puts his phone down and settles comfortably on the bed, unable to shake off a weird feeling. He drags his hand down the empty side of his bed and sighs. He falls asleep thinking that maybe Eliott being here wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

 ***

 “So, how was the run?” Lucas asks when they’re all seated by their table in the cafeteria. He woke up still feeling weird and had to check his calls to see whether he hasn’t dreamed of it, but no, Eliott really called him in the middle of the night. Had he been more awake, he’d have stopped Eliott from doing whatever he’s done.

Everyone, including Eliott, sends him questioning looks, but Lucas pays them no mind, solely focusing his gaze on Eliott. It takes a few seconds, but the realisation eventually dawns upon Eliott and he opens his mouth.

“It was good. Feeling sore, though,” he says, grinning towards Lucas. “I’ve been studying for my exams,” Eliott changes the topic, digging into his potatoes. “The material is so hard, but I’m sort of getting it. I read so many books in the last few days I feel like my head’s about to explode.”

“Explode with knowledge!” Basile jokes and Eliott bursts out laughing before launching into a story he’s read online recently.

He gets a little lost halfway through and changes the topic again. The guys indulge him, but Lucas can’t help feeling uneasy. He squints his eyes. Eliott is too jumpy for some reason.

Maybe it’s his ex-girlfriend that he mentioned during their phone call? Lucas doesn’t even know their story so who knows how much effect she can have on him. Or it’s about the exams that are looming over them. Whatever it is, something tells Lucas it’s not good. He wishes he could help Eliott calm down, talk with him, but Eliott seems so far away. He’s so close yet completely out of reach. From the very beginning of the week, since the mural.

What if it’s Lucas’ fault? Eliott is nervous because Lucas hasn’t said anything about it, quite literally decided to ignore what Eliott’s done. But then again, it’d go against him telling Lucas that he didn’t want anything from him.

Lucas could just ask, but he isn’t sure Eliott would tell him. There’s only one thing Lucas is certain of – something is bothering Eliott.

Someone waves a hand in front of Lucas’ face, snapping him out of his thoughts. He jumps and realises that when he zoned out, he was literally staring at Eliott. Which, given Arthur’s suspicions from the last week, doesn’t put him in the best position.

“You okay?” Yann asks, a line of worry appearing between his eyebrows.

“Yeah, just thinking,” he says, shrugging. He’s trying to come off as cool despite being caught staring at one of them. Lucas isn’t sure how well it goes, but no one comments on his weird behaviour.

Eliott throws a French fry at him and it smacks Lucas straight on the nose. “Don’t think too much or you’ll end up like me,” he says and winks at him.

Lucas tilts his head to the side. What does that even mean?

“Anyways, okay, guys, what about we chill tomorrow a bit? In the park? It’s been a while since we spent Friday together,” Basile suggests, grinning at them eagerly.

Yeah, it sounds nice. Considering all the turmoil Lucas has been through, it really has been some time since he simply relaxed with his friends. Sure, there were brief moments but nothing like what they’d do usually.

“Sounds pretty good. I think I have some weed stashed somewhere. I could bring it,” Arthur says excitedly.

“Tomorrow after school?” Yann asks them and they all nod.

Lucas is still concerned about Eliott so maybe tomorrow will be also a good occasion to check if everything is alright. Smoking could loosen Eliott up and make him talk a bit.

 ***

 Lucas takes a drag and passes the joint to Basile. He releases the smoke after holding it in and leans back against the grass. He can literally feel the tension leaving his body. He hadn't realised how much he’s needed it up until now.

They are lying around in a secluded area of the park, save from any prying eyes. Free to do whatever they want for as long as they need to. They’re on their second joint and sure, having it shared between five people won’t be as effective as it normally would be, but Lucas still feels much lighter.

It’s mostly quiet aside from music playing from Arthur’s phone. They don’t talk much despite Lucas having wanted to get some information out of Eliott. He thinks that maybe later. At the moment, he feels like taking a nap. Or just staring at the sky. It’s really fucking blue today and the weather is warm. They chose a great day to hang out.

Lucas sighs heavily just as Eliott plops down next to him. Lucas turns his head to the side and meets his eyes. Lucas’ fingertips itch to move Eliott’s fringe away from his eyes, but he keeps his hand to himself. It’s a weird thought to have about your friend.

“What’s up?” Lucas asks and when Eliott does nothing but look at him, Lucas nudges him in the side.

“You look pretty like that,” Eliott blurts out, his eyes glinting and Lucas’ breath hitches in his throat. He looks around to see if any of the guys has heard it, but no one seems to have paid attention.

Lucas lets out a nervous chuckle, ignoring the warmth climbing up his neck. “Thanks,” he mutters, his eyes settling on some random spot on Eliott’s t-shirt.

Eliott shuffles even closer to him. “Can I hold your hand?”

Lucas bites on the inside of his cheek, his heart speeding up for some reason. Why’s he feeling so lightheaded all of sudden? Must be the weed. What else?

“Yeah,” he breathes out, inching his palm towards Eliott. It doesn’t have any meaning. They do hold hands sometimes for comfort. Lucas has held hands with plenty of his friends.

Eliott grabs Lucas’ palm in his and entwines their fingers together. He squeezes once and Lucas’ heart skips a beat.

Lucas closes his eyes in order not to look at Eliott’s face. He’s scared of what it could make him feel.

“I’m so happy I could die right now,” Eliott whispers.

Lucas snorts. “What?”

“I don’t think I could be happier than this. Dying would be the best option at the moment so that would be the last feeling in my life. And I’d die next to you,” Eliott says, his thumb rubbing the back of Lucas’ hand.

“What? Don’t say something like that,” Lucas replies, half-heartedly hitting Eliott in the chest with his free hand.

Eliott lets out a laugh. “Sorry,” he pauses. “How many Lucases and Eliotts are lying down like that now?”

Lucas hums thoughtfully and settles on, ”Probably a lot.”

Eliott huffs and Lucas can feel him shaking his head. “All of them,” he says, convinced.

“Why’re you asking if you know the answer?”

“Because I wanted to know yours,” Eliott replies, honesty audible in his voice.

Lucas doesn’t say anything to this because he has no idea which words would be fitting. The mood is too nice for him to open his mouth and ruin it. So he stays quiet, breathing Eliott’s smell in and slowly feeling himself drift off. He doesn’t even register the moment Eliott disappears from beside him.

 ***

 “Hey, buddy, you okay?” Lucas hears through the fog in his mind. Someone shakes his shoulders, but it’s not the same person who spoke. The voice is more distant, that’s how he knows it’s not towards him.

Lucas blinks his eyes open. The first thing he notices is that it’s darker than he remembers from before he fell asleep. The second is Arthur hovering over him, his expression tense.

“Something bad is happening with Eliott,” he whispers, reaching his hand up to help Lucas sit up.

“What?” Lucas asks after being hoisted up. His eyes immediately jump towards where he can hear quiet murmurs from. Eliott looks barely present, with an almost haunted look on his face. Basile and Yann are crouching on both of his sides, talking to him, but barely getting any responses.

“After you fell asleep he started being really jittery, kept walking around. At first, we brushed it off, but it kept getting worse and worse. We had to stop him from running off,” Arthur explains as they walk up to where the three boys are.

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Lucas asks, keeping his eyes on Eliott.

“It started getting really bad like ten to fifteen minutes ago,” Yann says.

They had more things to keep their eyes on than thinking of waking Lucas up. Understandable.

Basile is still talking to Eliott, trying to keep him grounded. Eliott’s replies are quiet and chaotic. Something is off about this situation and Lucas is pretty sure that four stoned teenagers won’t be able to deal with it well if it keeps escalating.

“We should call his parents,” Lucas says.

“Yeah. If it’s what I think it is, we better do that,” Basile says, his voice full of seriousness.

Lucas gulps, watching Eliott, and his heart breaks. He should have seen it coming sooner.

[titsoutforkapanen]

Giving in. Ch 1

Thank you so so much to @moozoons and @segsnbacoon for all the help with ideas. I am so excited to write this story!!

———————————————————

I waited while the facetime call was ringing. Once he answered I could already tell he wasn’t at his house.

“I’m at Tyler’s, Hazy. Can I call you back?”

“Uh no. It’s important”

“Well continue”

I was about to tell Jamie the news when I saw the face of Tyler walk up behind him.

“Damn Jamie, who’s this?” Tyler said sending me a wink. I laughed as Jamie snapped his head around to face Tyler.

“My baby sister who is NINETEEN”

“But her name doesn’t start with a J” Tyler said rolling his eyes.

“That because she was adopted you idiot. Anyways. Hazy what did you need to tell me?”

“Well I wanted to tell you that.. I WAS ACCEPTED TO UT SOUTHWESTERN!” I yelled excitedly. Jamie was soon smiling with big toothy grin.

“I’m so proud of you! and now you can live with me which means no boys” I rolled my eyes at his comment.

“Whatever, Jame. I’ll be there in 2 weeks. See you soon”

“See you soon, H”

“Yeah! See you soon Hazy!” Tyler yelled from across the room.

ONE MONTH LATER

I was sitting on the couch with Jamie playing video games when Tyler walked into the house.

“Hey Jame, little Jame” Tyler said sitting beside me, closer than necessary. Ever since I moved here Tyler had been hitting all the time, despite me shutting him down everytime.

“I told you not to call me that, Tyler” I said rolling my eyes trying to pass Jamie on Mario Kart. “Fucking A Jamie why did you throw that shell at me?” I grumbled. I felt a hand slowly run down my arm and underneath my blanket. I whipped my head to my right looking directly at Tyler. He sent me a wink as he rubbed my thigh. My whole body tensed but before I could do anything I felt my controller shake and Jamie cheered.

“See Hazy, I told you I would win” Jamie said laughing as he got up and walked into the kitchen.

“What ever” I mumbled. “Jamie I need you to take me to a car dealership so I can my own car mom and dad told you you had too” I said standing up throwing my blanket on Tyler.

“Actually, they just told me you needed a car not that I needed to bring you”

“I want to go places without needing to ask you, you won’t let me drive your car and never want to drive me” I said standing across the bar from him. “I also want to go skate at the rink but you won’t take me to get skates”

“I have your hockey skates here” he said leaning on the counter.

“I’m a figure skater you idiot”

“I am housing you, you have to respect me”

“You are my older brother, I don’t have to do shit” I said walking towards my bedroom. I was almost all the way up the stairs when Tyler spoke up.

“I’ll bring her to the car dealership and to get skates then I’ll show her where she can check in at the rink” He said looking between me and Jamie.

“I’m down but I have to change” I said walking towards my room to get ready.

Tyler was already in his jeep when I walked downstairs. “Here, take my card. I know you have the money for the car but just use my card for any accessories you need for the car and your skates”

“You don’t have to Jame” I said with a smile.

“Just take it, now go Tyler’s waiting” I sent Jamie a smile and walked outside. When I got into the passenger seat of the Jeep Tyler sent me a wink and a smirk.

“Ready for the day of your life, babygirl?”

“That’s almost as bad as ‘baby Jame’”

We had been walking around the dealership for an hour and a half and we still didn’t have an idea for what car I wanted.

“I told you I liked that Jeep”

“I don’t want you to copy me”

“Oh my god Tyler shut up. I’m getting the Jeep” I said signalling for the dealer.

I signed all the paper and was now the owner of a 2016 Jeep Wrangler. Tyler and I walked out onto the lot and towards my new Jeep. “Are you going to show me the way to the shop so I can get skates?”

“Yeah, just drive over to where I’m parked and follow me” I got in my jeep and smiled to myself knowing that this was mine and that I didn’t need to ask Jamie to drive me places anymore.

INSTAGRAM

Hazy_Bennn: I got my very own car today! Photo creds to @tseguin92 “you look stupid” “just take the picture, Tyler”

We had finally finished shopping and were on our way to the arena. I had somehow convinced Tyler to ride with me. The drive to the arena was going to be about 20 minutes. We were listening to the music when I felt a hand on my thigh. I tore my eyes from the road to send Tyler a warning look. “What are you doing, Tyler?”

“Trying to show you that I like you”

“What are we? 12?” I laughed pushing his hand away. I couldn’t deny that Tyler was attractive. I had always thought so but I never said anything since I knew Jamie would either beat me or Tyler, or both.

“Come on, you can’t tell me you’ve never thought about us”

“I’m 19”

“Almost 20 actually”

“Jamie would beat us”

“He would not”

“Stop, Tyler. Nothing is going to happen. It never will”

“Okay, okay fine” he mumbled as he turned the music back up.

Tyler and I had been skating for about an hour and my feet were starting to hurt from the new skates. We walked back to the locker room so I could take my skates off. “I’m tireddddd will you untie my skates for me?” I begged holding my feet out.

“Yeah fine, hold on” he laughed as he took his shirt off and used it to wipe the sweat off his forehead. I opened instagram and started recording.

“Wow y’all look at this…. A shirtless Tyler Seguin” I laughed as he connected his phone to the bluetooth speaker across the locker room. He started dancing to the song that was playing as he walked towards me. “You’re a horrible dancer” I joked zooming the video into his face. He kneeled down in front of me and started to untie my skates. When he was done he went and sat down in his stall and started to undo his own skates. I was reading something on twitter when I heard Tyler cough. I looked up and saw he was already looking at me.

“Wanna come sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that pops up?” I laughed at his attempt at a pick up line. I knew Jamie would hate me for this but I wouldn’t let him find out.

“What about doing something more than talking?” I asked walking towards him. I straddled his lap and put my hands on his chest. Tyler just stared at me with a surprised look. “It seems like you’re all talk, babe” I whispered running my hands over his abs. It wasn’t long till I felt his lips on mine. His hands ran down my back till they decided to rest on my ass.

He lightly bit my bottom lip causing me to gasp so he could slip his tongue into my mouth. Our tongues were fighting for dominance and I was losing. I moaned as he rubbed his hands along my ass and hips. Tyler’s hands left my ass and ran along the hem of my shirt. He pulled my top off and started kissing down my neck definitely leaving marks in his path. My hands hovered above the top of his pants starting to unbutton them.

“Oh shit, dude I’m sorry” Tyler and I immediately pulled apart at the sound of the voice. “I mean come on though dude I thought we told you to stop bringing people down to to fuck” the voice laughed. The voice sounded familiar but I couldn’t put a face to it. I was scared to turn around so I hid my face in Tyler’s neck. “So who is the lucky girl?” the guy questioned. I knew I wasn’t getting out of it so I just hoped it wasn’t someone who knew me. I got off of Tyler and quickly threw my shirt on and sat beside him. When I looked up to see who it was that was talking I almost stopped breathing. It was Jason Spezza.

“Oh my god” I whispered sending Tyler a worried look he returned the look when Spezza turned around.

“Holy shit, Hazy? What are you two doing? Does Jamie know? What is he going to say?” I felt my heart rate quicken when Tyler spoke up.

“We were just messing around, nothing serious. We were just leaving” he said grabbing my skates in one hand and taking my hand in his other.

“What if he tells Jamie, Tyler?” I asked feeling my anxiety building.

“He won’t it’s bro code”

“I don’t think bro code counts when your captains little sister is involved” I said as a tear rolled down my cheek.

“He won’t say anything and if he does it was just a one time thing. We’ll be okay” Tyler said reassuring me as he wiped the tear away with his thumb. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen now. But all I could do was hope for the best.

INSTAGRAM

Hazy_bennn: Jamie and I tried to have a sibling day but not only 20 minutes in he started making fun of me so wow. I love being the youngest sibling.

Jamiebenn14: congrats to this idiot for buying her own car the other day. I would say #proudbrother but as soon as she was home she annoyed me.

[sporadic-writer]

Mrs. All American pt. 3

Harrison x Reader

Warnings: swearing, mentions of alcohol and partying, but that’s about it

Also this may be considered long.. Idk I just wanted to write and kept going.

Summary: the three of you prep for the party.

Yeah that’s a boring summary but it’s all I got ok?

Part 1 here! Part 2 here!

°••°••°••°••°••°••°

It was around 11:45 in the morning. Tom and Harrison were hanging out in Tom's kitchen while he made some lunch. Both men had been up for a couple of hours. You however, had yet to emerge from your room.

"Should we wake her up? It's almost 12." Harrison looked to the direction of your room then back to Tom who simply shook his head no.

"Nah she usually wakes up between 10 and 1. Broad range but it's how she is. I will guess though that she will be up soon." He wiped his hands off of crumbs and looked at his sandwich. "Man I could be a chef. This looks amazing."

"Mate, last time you made soup you burnt the fucking pot so badly you had to throw it out."

Rolling his eyes he replied. "Yeah but no heat involved this time so all is good." He turned to clean up and get a drink and failed to see you come up to the island.

You smirked and made a shush motion to Harrison. Quietly, you grabbed the plate and moved to sit next to Harrison. Then you grabbed half of the sandwich and took a bite. It was around then that Tom turned around and noticed you.

"Hey sleeping beauty made it up before 12. Proud of you!" He seemed to take no notice of the theft that took place. Grabbing his cup he took a sip and turned back around. You suppressed a laugh along with Harrison. Then he turned back around and went to grab where his plate was. He stopped as you were on your second bite. Confused, he looked around and then his eyes met yours. While chewing you maintained eye contact. "You bitch! Give that back!" He leaned over and snatched the plate. At this point everyone was laughing.

"Dude that didn't even click right away for you. I got 2 bites deep. Tasty by the way."

"I made that myself. You don't deserve it!" You noticed the purpose and guard he had while eating. You simply laughed more. While sitting you felt Harrison's hand on your back and heard him speak up.

"Let him have it love. It apparently is a major accomplishment in his life that he performed a basic life skill." Tom flipped his friend off and you slipped off the chair. Moving around the island you brushed your hand on Harrison's arm, mentally noting how strong he felt. You were a sucker for nice arms and good abs and Harrison was the jackpot for both in your eyes. The abs were yet to be seen, but you knew. Call it female intuition.

"Tom, not being able to cook just confirms the privileged actor stereotype. Don't let the haters be right. Now where do you keep your pans. I'm makin’ eggs." He told you were they were and you began preparing your breakfast.

With your back turned you didn't see a set of blue eyes look at you fondly. However, your ears heard him speak to you. "You know how to cook?" He saw you nod yes. "Lovely! Now teach Tom here. You really are just light years ahead of him."

"Oh I am. Speaking of being better than you! When do you want to do that rematch boy?" You looked at him, away from your pan of scrambling eggs. Although, Harrison was in the dark.

Tom scoffed. "We can do it whenever you want. You won on because of lag and I still call bullshit."

"Anyone want to fill me in?" Harrison felt the slightest ping of jealousy that you and Tom had inside jokes and stories. He knew that you knew him longer and all that. But he pushed it down. After all, you weren't kissing Tom on the couch last night.

Your voice brought him back to reality. "He and I played a series of Call of Duty: World War 2 games and I won overall and he got pissy. He also claims I only won because of lag on his end. I say he's a sore loser." As you finished your sentence you plated your eggs and stuck your tongue out. Then you sat back down next to Harrison.

"When you're done I'm kicking your ass." In a condescending manner, you nodded your head to play along. You sat and ate your eggs while he finished his sandwich.

Eventually both of you finished your food and Tom dragged you to the couch and turned on the TV.

"Can we use the Xbox? I'm trash on Playstation."

He groaned. "Fine. Either way I'll win. But we play a few public rounds to warm up and then I pick the first style of game we play."

"Whatever. Neither of us has played in a hot minute so let's see how this goes." You cracked your knuckles and the 3rd person in the room simply watched in amusement. Plus, he thought it was kind of attractive you knew how to play video games. You were cool as hell, played video games, and could cook. He found the most well rounded girl in the world. He watched both of you play some team deathmatch and he had to admit, you weren't horrible. You knew what you were doing and held your own.

Tom left the lobby and you looked at him. "Ok I've gone positive the whole time. So I am either set or it's all downhill from here. How about instead of 1v1 we just see who does better each round of a public game? 1v1 is boring."

"Fine but I'm picking the first game." His voice got sly and he smirked. You watched in fear as he selected your worst game mode. "Get fucked Y/N."

"Noo can't we just play regular team deathmatch or like kill confirmed? People kick my ass in any hardcore mode."

The non-player spoke up to settle everything. "Just play free for all and whoever is higher is better. Duh."

You and Tom looked at each other and agreed. Then you made your classes and played for a while. Harrison tried to make a joke about you only using SMGs and like 1 assault rifle. All you did was respond with a “careful Harrison” in a warning tone and he backed down while laughing. In the end, Tom came out better than you by 2 games. Once Tom got his moment of being a sore winner out of his system you asked the boys how the party was going to happen. Harrison spoke first.

“I say we go to the liquor store first. I want to see the guys face of us buying so much shit before 2 pm.” He came up behind you on the couch. You leaned your head back and smiled up at the blue eyes above you. He winked at you in a flirty manner.

Picking your head back up you looked to Tom. “Now Tom, not to be a smart ass,” he scoffed, “shut it. But will people say something about you running into a liquor store then buying a ton?” You looked at him and he went into thought.

“I guess it wouldn’t look great for someone through Disney to clean them out. But take my card when you go. I will get food and some stuff. That way it looks fine. Plus, we can still get trashed.” Everyone agreed with that plan. “Ok so Haz you and Y/N go get the booze, enough to make all our livers cry, and I will get other stuff. Meet back here.”

So you and Harrison went off to the store after you changed into some shorts. Luckily, booze was a generally understood and universal concept. Everything was sorted out as usual, but this time there was a few different European selections, and an American section.

“So what do you want? Tom made the mistake of leaving us his card, so we can get top shelf stuff.” Harrison looked to you with mischief in his eyes. You liked it, but the good friend in you told him no need to go crazy.

Walking towards the vodka, grabbing some schnapps, you turned to scold him. “I am not taking advantage of my rich friend. I will get some stuff on my own. But I don’t see the harm in the bulk coming from him. Nothing crazy though, we get a lot and get make sure we get drunker than a French skunk. Put down the Everclear! I did that my freshman year and don’t remember a thing past the second shot.”

“That’s impressive! But fine at least grab the Ciroc and that kind of nice stuff. If we are going all out for this then we are doing it right. No protests! You only party in London once love.” He grabbed some various vodka bottles and you got a couple other varieties of rum, whisky, and some silver tequila. Between you both you looked like you could restock the busiest pub in town.

As you were walking out of the store you asked him, “Hey wait. Who all is coming to this tonight anyway? I only know you, Tom, and his family.”

“Uh I think the twins, some of his Marvel friends, and some of our friends along with co-stars.” He spoke as if it was a normal thing to casual get trashed with celebrities. However, you stopped right at the car.

“I’m sorry did you say Marvel people and co-stars?! Like it’s nothing? I can’t meet famous people! And I for sure can’t get trashed in front of them.” You looked at him as if he had lost his mind.

The bafflement on his face was clear. “Why not? You know Tom. They are normal people. It’ll be fine. We don’t hate your presence, neither will they. And they don’t care if you get drunk. I have seen plenty of Tom’s Marvel co-stars get very drunk. The co-stars are around our age it’s fine.” His words made you feel a little better, but the nerves were there regardless. Both of you drove back and carried everything into Tom’s apartment. He turned to you both as you came in.

“Awesome you’re back. The food, pizza mainly, is ordered and will be here on time. People will start showing up around 7 I think.” You nodded. That gave you plenty of time to get ready. Since celebs were going to be there, you wanted to look your best. Tom spoke again and snapped you out of your planning. “I say we be ready by 6 or half past and pregame just us."

"Works for me. I am going to make a drink myself to sip on while I get ready."

"Y/N you literally have like 3 hours." The boys looked at you like you were crazy.

"True. But I like getting ready early so it can settle and I am not rushed. I like to take my time. Don't worry I'll be ready before 6." You made a vodka cranberry and walked off to start your process. Admitting it to no one, you were excited to get ready. This kind of stuff was fun, you got in the zone and did your thing. Eventually, you found yourself in a towel trying to work the shower. Every time you use a new shower, it’s like trying to solve a Rubik’s cube. You sighed and gave up hope.

From the main room the boys heard you yell that you can’t work the shower. Both looked at each other after. Tom smirked and looked back to his phone. “You go. I know you want to.” When Harrison didn’t move he spoke again. “What are you waiting for?! A hot girl is waiting in a towel. Have you ever seen American Pie?”

“Shut it mate. You’re an idiot.” He got up and started walking towards where you called from.

From the couch the actor mumbled, “At least I didn’t freeze when a girl called needing help with the shower.”

You heard the knock at the door and said come in. Expecting Tom, you smiled when Harrison walked in instead. “Sorry.. I just don’t know how to get the water started.”

“It’s fine love.” You thought it was cute how he was trying, trying, to look anywhere but you. What a gentleman you thought. The smile on your face and the blush on his was adorable.

“Harrison, you’re allowed to look at me. It’s a towel, not the direct blaze of the sun.” His blue eyes met your e/c ones and he smiled faintly at you.

Turning the water on then scratching the back on his neck he smiled again and said, “Sorry, I just didn’t want to be rude.”

He started walking out and you said it’s totally fine and that you didn’t mind. As he shut the door you thanked him and slipped in. Music playing and you singing along put you in a good mood. Taking your time, you enjoyed the hot water with your nice travel products. Plus,Tom had a nice shower.

Soon your shower was done and you slipped out to your room. Keeping the towel on you put on some lotion, brushed your hair, put in some product, and sat down to begin your makeup. This didn’t take long, it was just that you took your time to get it right. You kept YouTube music and videos playing. Hair drying, drink being drank, and makeup looking on point made you feel damn good. It’s like Iiza Shlesinger said, ‘You know when you look hot.’ Your clothes weren’t even on and you felt great. The nerves of famous people being around lessened. You were relaxed. Next thing you did was drop the towel and put your outfit on. Luckily, you asked Tom what kind of a party this was going to be. He told you to dress like you were going to a casual club with your friends; so a simple but sexy outfit. No need to dress for a popular club in LA or New York, but not jeans or basic stuff. This was more than your college parties so you put your simple black dress. It was the kind that could be worn at a party, a cocktail dinner, or even a funeral (not to be morbid, but to note that it is still formal and not too slutty) it just mattered how you worked it. Zipping it up, you grabbed your black platforms and stood up. Unlike most girls, you liked wearing heels. Yes, they hurt by the end of the night but it was fine. Not to mention, at school you didn’t wear them out too much since you would walk back around outside more. That and you were typically lit when you did. Friends leaning on each other were no held if they were just as gone. But not tonight! For the finishing touches you swapped out a couple rings, put on your leather and Alex and Ani bracelets, and your earrings and necklace. Doing one final look over in the mirror, you were satisfied. The time read 5:38. Perfect. Spraying some perfume on, you went to see what the boys were doing.

Walking out you heard the microwave go off and smelled popcorn. You noticed Tom was in a nicer shirt and shoes. Harrison changed as well into some more appropriate clothes. His jeans were darker and his red shirt looked good in contrast to his light hair, which was brushed and styled a little. As Tom turned with the popcorn, he heard the clack of your heels as you approached and leaned on the island. He whistled lightly, you blushed and smiled, and Harrison looked up and his jaw dropped. Never before had you made a man’s jaw drop and it simply added to your confidence. 

“I don’t know about you guys, but I am ready to party.” Your eyes lingered on Harrison and the corner of your lips turned up. You finished your drink and took a grab at the popcorn. Tom made you a new one while Harrison kept his eyes on you. He took in how you looked more dressed up compared to your cute and casual looks from before. In his mind, you looked sexy. No doubt about it.

Despite his mind being rattled, “Y/N you look great,” is all he managed to get out.

Tom nodded and set out three shot glasses. “I gotta agree. On vacation you never dressed like this.”

“Well that was me in high school. An awkward dork who didn’t do this stuff that often. Let alone know how to do it well. But I have a few years of college under my belt. You haven’t seen me in action Tom.” The shot glasses were filled with Ciroc. You all cheered and downed the shots. When you didn’t wince, both became impressed. Even they coughed or cringed a bit. You grabbed another. You could hold you liquor quite well and knew a couple shots to start would be fine until later tonight. After downing the second easily you walked over to Harrison and put your hand on his shoulder. His arm went to your waist.

From the other side of the island Tom just looked at your shot glass, back to you, smiled and said, “Shit. This is gonna be a great night.”

°••°••°••°••°••°••°

Next chapter will be the party. Sorry if this wasn’t enough Harrison and stuff, you don’t like the swearing, or the booze was something you didn’t like.. Also, this may be boring to you. Idk I like the “domestic” and simple writing sometimes. Nice filler and fun is always good.

As always, I hope those who read liked it. Feel free to comment, like, and reblog!

[lolabean1998]

Avengers Fanfic - 3rd Super Soldier! (Part 2)

So I apologise in advance for this, you’ll just have to bear with me on this, I’m trying something new! Good Luck, Enjoy, Share, Comment, etc... If you want to be added to the tag list then give me a shout i’m more than happy to tag away! LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH YOU’RE THE BEST!

The next couple of days passed without you even knowing, your body had totally shut down, taking the time it needed to repair itself.

"Bucky you need to say something! You can't keep her in the dark like this, she deserves to know!" Steve shouted, his arms flailing about with frustration.

"What if i triggers something?" Bucky growled. "I can't risk putting her through that."

"Keep fucking yelling and I'm putting both of you through that fucking window." You groan, rubbing your eyes as you gradually sit up, your H/C hair resembles that of an adorably messy blend of a birds nest and severe bed head. The grey film that once coated your eyes has now almost completely vanished, revealing your magnificent E/C eyes. Though your eyesight wasn't completely back you could still see blurry shapes and figures, you looked around the room before scanning yourself for injuries. Both casts had gone and nothing looked or felt out of place, Looks like the only thing left to heal is my eyes.

"I see some things never change." Steve mumbled to Bucky pulling a low chuckle from him.

"The bed hair thing hasn't changed either." Bucky mumbled back, making sure to keep his voice low enough for you not to hear, he had always found your crazy bed hair adorable along with the sleepy look that seemed to dance playfully on your face.

"Sorry couldn't hear that what did you guys say?" You asked sarcastically, your hearing was up to normal people standard but it still had a while to go before it hit your usual super human standard.

"Nothing!" The two  men replied in unison, you gave them a sleep scowl before you began stretching the sleep out your muscles.

"Oh no, i know what you're thinking and the answers no! Doc said you're on bed rest until further notice." Steve warned.

"Pfft that's not happening, I'm hungry and bored." Your scoffed stretching your arms down to your toes. "Besides I've kicked Bucky out of his bed for long enough, the dude needs sleep. Even with my blurry vision i can see that he looks like shit." You smirked.

"You've just woken up how can you possibly be bored?" Bucky questioned stifling a chuckle as you finished your stretches and moved to get out of bed. "Oh no you don't. You're staying put." He said firmly, moving his metal arm quickly but cautiously around your waist and pulling you back into bed.

"Move it or lose it Bucky, but either way I'm getting out of this room." Your warned raising a mischievous eyebrow. "Unless of course, you're joining me in here." You flirted playfully, wrapping your fingers around the collar of his shirt and pulling him towards you whilst curling a seductive leg around his.

"I thought i had to make you dinner first." He responded flirtatiously, gripping your upper thigh with his flesh hand and staring deep into your eyes. He was challenging you.

"Um, hey guys could you maybe not do this while I'm here please?" Steve asked awkwardly, you and Bucky flick your heads in his direction, a dangerously innocent smile spread across your face.

"I thought you were going to join us?" You reply innocently, making both boys choke on their own oxygen.

"Oh no, baby-doll. I don't share." Bucky soothed kissing the side of your neck before helping you off the bed.

"Bucky what are you doing? She's supposed to be on bed rest!" Steve queried folding his arms in irritation.

"Steve no matter what we do, she's going to get her way. We both know this, so it's easier to let her go at least if she's in the living room watching movies she'll still be resting." Bucky claimed, smirking at the smug grin plastered across your face.

"Fine but you're explaining this to Banner and she's your responsibility. I want no part in her shenanigans." Steve huffed before strolling out.

"How does he know i was planning Shenanigans? I didn't say a thing!" You whine as Buck leads you to the common room.

"Let's just say he's a good judge of character." Bucky smiled as they entered the kitchen.

"Look who's finally up! I'm surprised they let you out of bed. I'm Nat by the way." A smiling red head commented as you and Bucky entered the room.

"I don't think they were to impressed with their other options and Bucky doesn't share." You grinned as Bucky guided you to sit beside Nat on the sofa.

"Shame, we could've had fun Barnes." Nat teased giving you a sly wink.

"I guess we'll have to find some one else to join in with our fun." You continue, taking great please in the awkward expression making it's way across Bucky's face.

"I'm sure Sam would be up for it." Nat teased knowing exactly how to push Bucky's buttons. "Oh you'll love him, he's the dude with the bird wings and insane abs." Nat enthused sending you a knowing wink. Bucky tried his best to ignore the pair of you as he began throwing something together in the kitchen.

"Hey, hang on a minute. I was supposed to be raiding the fridge!" You exclaimed when you finally realised what he had done.

"Not today you're not, today you are resting and watching movies. And NO pranks." Bucky concluded firmly.

"Buzz kill! There was me thinking you were the fun one!" You complain giving the back of his head a particularly evil glare.

"I felt that!" Bucky called back to you, before turning around to look you dead in the eye, a wicked plan forming in his mind. "I'll make you a deal, if i manage to guess your favourite meal and make it too perfection you do as you're told until Banner gives you the all clear, if i don’t... then I'll help you with as many pranks as you like for a week. We have a deal?"

"That’s suicide, you don’t even know my name let alone my favourite foods! But hell if you're willing to take the leap of faith who am i to stop you. Deal" You respond confidently, there wasn't a doubt in your mind that you were going to win.

"Wait, they didn't even ask your name? Barnes i'm shocked!" Nat exclaimed, "What is your name?" She asked smiling warmly at you.

"Y/N, I don't know the rest so its just Y/N." You answered honestly, the pain of not even knowing your full name spring up for a split second before you stuffed it back down. You weren't going to let anyone see that it pained you, no one could ever see how vulnerable and wounded you actually were, to the outside world you were a bubbly, witty girl without a care in the world.

Bucky's POV!

I was so sure that you were dead after you went missing, we searched and searched. I begged and pleaded every night, for you to come back to us, to be ok. I never meant for this to happen.

I watched as you and Nat joked and laughed whilst she talked about the team, telling you stories of previous missions and the pranks she'd pulled. Your laugh was the one thing that kept me going, all my years at H.Y.D.R.A through all the torture and brainwashing one thing always remained untouched. The memory of you laughing and joking at our favourite bar, teasing Steve about his desperate need to join the army. That was the last night either of us saw you.

"This one time... we were on a mission... and Tony swore over the coms..," Nat explained through fits of giggles induced by the memory she was sharing. "And the first... the first thing... Cap said... was 'Language'" Nat finished, doing her best impression of Steve, which was surprisingly accurate, sending you into a fits of giggles, it was like heroin to me only this was far more addicting and a hundred times deadlier.

"You know what, that actually doesn't surprise me." You admitted wiping away the joyful tears that had sprung to your hypnotising eyes, the uncontrollable giggles had finally subsided and had left you with the most adorable rosy cheeks.

"Okay ladies, lunch, is served." I declared, passing the girls a bowl each of my secret recipe Goulash and a tray of peanut straws, smiling smugly when i saw the shock and disbelief spread across your flawless face. "What's wrong? Don't like it?" I asked sarcastically taking my seat on the chair beside you.

"How could you possibly fucking know that this is my favourite? This recipe is over a hundred years old?" You exclaimed shock and confusion playing on your features.

"Now you're just making him sound old." Nat chimed in, tucking into her bowl of steaming pasta.

"Lucky guess i suppose." I smiled turning to the large screen TV in front of us an pulling up a list of Disney movies, you'd been through so much you needed the innocence of a children's movie. "Now sit quietly, eat your food and watch the movie." I instructed playfully before pressing play.

We spent the rest of the day snacking and watching old movies, I'd spend most of the time stealing glimpses of you, afraid that if i didn't check on you every 10 minutes you'd disappear again.

"Training room in ten, Steve want's everyone there. Y/N you can come if you want but Banner said you are only there to observe." Wanda informed, sticking her head round the door to the common room.

"Great, another surprise training session, Steve is becoming a drill sergeant. Come on." I grumbled, grunting as i moved from my comfy position on the sofa next to you, stretching as i stood.

"Didn't you say you were a sergeant?" You quipped as we made our way to the training room. I couldn't help but laugh, you always had a quick wit and a smile that could get you out of anything.

Your POV!

"Sam, you're up next. Please don't let him win again." Steve muttered as Bucky pinned Tony to the ground. "His head won't fit out the door if this carries on." Sam gave a determined nod and made his onto the mat. The boy's spent the next half an hour sparring, Sam was getting more and more frustrated with the cocky grin plastered across Bucky's face, after an exhausted attempt to sweep Bucky's leg Sam, like all others before him, was pinned to the ground.

"That was just painful to watch." You remarked to your new found friend Nat, also known as the Black widow as you found out earlier when she very nearly gave Bucky a run for his money. "I'LL BRING YOU A PILLOW AND DUVET SHALL I?" You called over to Bucky, your words teasing and playful.

"What are you talking about?" Bucky panted as he made his way over dabbing the small crystals of sweat that had formed across his forehead.

"Well there's no way you'll fit through the door with a head that size." You mocked, grimacing as he shook his sweat soaked hair.

"I'm still not following doll." Bucky admitted, throwing a sweaty arm over your shoulders when he saw your grimace.

"All brawn and no brains, pity. You were doing so well." You mocked, cringing at the sweat seeping through you thin long sleeved top your cautiously lifted his sweaty hand up using the tips of your finger and ducking out from underneath. But as fast as you were free, he had you wrapped in his sweaty, death grip again, laugh at the disgusted chuckle you were trying to fight. "No why? Come on Bucky let me go! Why are you doing this to me?" You wailed punch his back and trying your best to wriggle from his grip as he slung you over his should. Steve gave a hearty life to the unamused scowl creeping onto your face, it reminded him of a time before all of this, when you were just innocent kids. The memory of dancing in a dimly lit bar with you and Bucky came crashing over him like a wave, the sound of you and Bucky laughing and joking with him filled his ears and he was over come with nostalgia.

"You alright there Cap?" Nat asked stopping beside Steve watching him watch you and Bucky laugh and joke your way down the corridor. "This isn't the first time you've seen them like this is it?" She asked knowingly.

"They used to be like this all the time, there was never a dull moment if you were around them. Back then i was just a scrawny kid with a lot to prove, not a lot of people accepted me but these two goof balls never treated me any different to how they treated each other." Steve explained, his words laced with reminisce and joy. "We met her in the park, she had over heard some kids talking about how they were going to beat me and Bucky up and went strolling over to yell at them. We must have 9 or 10 at the time and were used to people beating on us for being friends and just for being us. People didn't accept scrawny kids like me back then and this tiny little 8 year old girl went strolling over to defend a kid she didn't even know." His eyes watered as the memory became clearer in his mind.

"What happened? Did they leave you alone afterwards?" Nat asked curiously, watching as you and Bucky disappeared round the corner.

"They beat her up instead, we went running over to defend her. The kids turned their attention to us leaving her lying on the ground. This huge kid spat at me and was just about to throw his first punch when she stood up, blood pouring from above her eye, covered in bruises. And through a busted lip she lifted her chin, squared up the kid and said 'Is that all you've got?' the sheer stubborn determination in her eyes sent these kids running. She just amazed us, this little girl took a serious beating, had her wrist and leg broken for some kids she didn't know and she didn't even bat an eyelid at it. We've been best friends ever since."

"Tough kid, does she know?" Nat asked sympathetically as they walked back up the corridor to the lift.

"No, she doesn't remember anything. Hell i don't think either of them know." Steve commented, chuckling at the thought.

"Did they ever know?" Nat asked curiously, already calculating the time it would take.

"Not a chance, they were oblivious to everything." Steve chuckled awkwardly, scratching the back of his head.

"How long until they figure it out? My moneys on 2 months, something that obvious. There's no way they could miss it." Nat questioned, a mischievous glint sparkling in her eyes.

"No way, they've been like this from day one. 6 months at least." Steve replied confidently.

"How much?" Nat asked nonchalantly.

"50?" Steve answered, the pair gave a silent nod before shaking hands to seal the bet, smirking as they exited the elevator and headed to their rooms to shower and change.

Masterlist

[disruptedvice]

One Sandwich Away From Cute (GOTG fic)

Of course based on the “one sandwich away from fat” line from Infinity War, because it needed to be done.

Summary: That night in bed Peter brings up the weight gaining comments, and Gamora reassures him she finds him very attractive Or: Peter’s insecure, and Gamora really, really likes the soft little pudge of his lower belly

AO3 Link

_________

One Sandwich Away From Cute _________

“So, what do you think?” Peter asked, sitting down on their bed and pulling off his boots as she shut their bedroom door and locked it. She was certain his question was regarding something that happened today, but a lot of things had happened. There was the rescuing the should be dead man who had half his people killed by her adoptive father, Drax’s strange and yet somehow not surprising obsession with the ‘pirate angel’, the promise she had Peter make, the group splitting up when they had a history of that not going well for the guardians, the fact that they were inevitably going to cross paths with Thanos much sooner than any of them thought when they woke up this morning- a lot had happened.

But, as she wiggled out of her shirt and tossed it in the hamper, Peter didn't look too dejected (well, he was sort of pouting, but in that cute way) and he didn't have a weight on his shoulders or the somberness in his expression that would come with those darker thoughts, so she was pretty sure he had something else on her mind. He wasn't frowning or grimacing- he was pouting. In that very cute put out way he had, so it seemed whatever he was thinking about was decidedly more light hearted than all those realities they were faced with today.

Which was good, because those depressing thoughts were a real mood killer, and it's not like she was making out with him in the hallway before shoving him in their room so they could not have sex right now. She wanted to get lost in his skin and his taste, but from the face he was making, she was certain she was going to hear something childish come from his mouth before they would be ‘getting down’ as one says.

“Is he right? Why didn't you tell me? Why’d I have to hear from Rocket I was getting fat?” Peter whined, and yup, she was right. Obviously this conversation was going to have to happen before they’d get to the sex, no matter how horny she was.

“I didn't notice anything wrong, Peter. I find you attractive, and I am the one having sex with you. Isn't that enough? If Rocket or Drax have any opinions on your appearance, what does it even matter anyway? You don't want to have sex with them, do you?” She took the disgusted face he made as answer enough. “Exactly. I like the way you look. It doesn't matter if they have a problem with your appearance. I find you very attractive.”

Gamora crossed the room towards him to effectively straddle his lap, running her hands up and down his chest in a very appreciative matter.

Peter paused for a moment, his lips pursing in thought as he considered her argument.

“So you're saying there is a problem,” he finally said, and Gamora just groaned in response. Or growled. Whatever it was, it was a very frustrated person noise. Whether it was sexual frustration or frustration because her boyfriend drove her crazy all the time was anyone's guess.

“Hey, I just wanna know if I should start trying to put on some bulk like muscle fiber man,” he whined quite petulantly. Though, a part of him was sure that no one (not even him, and he was amazing) could get up to that dude’s level. He called himself a god, and Peter was half celestial, so he was well aware that god like beings existed in this universe and had no reason other than spite to doubt his god of thunder claim. He said he would offer to demonstrate his lightning powers if they weren't on a metal ship in space that would get them all electrocuted.

Still.

And, at Peter’s claim right there, she finally got it. She should've known.

That this sudden influx of insecurity had to do with the jealousy of the literal god they’d found that their resident destroyer was quite taken with.

Though, in the back of her mind, she got to… appreciate the fact that Peter was jealous.

She was always the jealous one who hated when women flirted with the infamous pelvic sorcerer based on reputation alone, or when they ran into someone he used to lay with that really wanted another go around. Peter had too many exes.

Not a lot of people tried to hit on the deadliest woman in the galaxy, while she couldn't count the number of times someone had tried to pick up her boyfriend Starlord in her presence. Now they both had Guardians of the Galaxy and a tentative description of ‘good guys’ attached to their names. For the most part, though, Peter's reputation was for being good at sex, while Gamora’s reputation was for murder.

People tended not to try to flirt with deadly assassins (Peter being the one and only exception).

It's not like Thor was even flirting with her, but Peter still got jealous anyway. She was usually the one who got jealous in their relationship, not him.

Being on the other side of the jealousy coin was much more fun, she thought.

Besides, Peter was absurdly cute when he was jealous to top it all off.

But Gamora also knew that while she’d like to tease him, she needed to put a stop to this, because otherwise she’d never hear the end of it.

“I don't know how many times I can tell you I don't care,” Gamora said, pushing him down on the bed so hard and sudden that Peter yelped in surprise. And, for effect, she ripped his shirt open. She knew he didn't really care for this one, and would appreciate it leaving like this, being ripped off his body by Gamora’s hands.

“Oh my god, you're so hot,” Peter whispered in near exaltation, pupils dilating, actually gulping after being reminded of what they were planning on doing once they got back to their room. Gamora smirked down on him as she felt up his now exposed chest, over his abs, the muscles that were still deliciously defined even if they did have enough money to eat regular meals now.

“It’s your body,” she told him. “Do whatever you want with it. I like it how it is. If you want to do your flexible bow thing, fine. Do whatever you want. Just promise me you won't get rid of this-” Gamora said before swooping down to the slight pudge of his lower belly and giving him a sharp nip, which Peter most definitely squeaked at.

“That’s my tum-tum!” Peter exclaimed, his hands automatically moving to cover it up and protect it from her teeth or any more Gamora bites.

She in turn just smiled at him downright mischievously. “I know. I like it. Like how it always makes you squeal when I bite it. Do whatever muscle building thing you need to do to make yourself feel better. Just keep this for me,” she said, niggling her finger in between the gaps in his to stroke his stomach, somehow managing to be reassuring and condescending at the same exact time. Her touch light as a feather, almost tickling the soft hairs just below his navel.

“I like it. It's my favorite place to bite you and make you squeal,” Gamora grinned, sounding like she was making a promise.

“Are you serious?” He asked, still not sure whether to believe her or if she was just joking. It sounded like it had to be a joke.

Gamora frowned, her brows lowering at him doubting her sincerity.

“Of course I'm serious. I like it. You're so soft,” she seemingly stroked his happy trail just for emphasis. “Why do you think I touch your lower stomach so much when you are the little spoon? I like it. And it is oddly sexual. I don't know why, but I just want to bite it. In a good way. Now are you done being jealous and self conscious and I can have fun now biting the soft little pudge of your lower belly, or do you need more reassurances?” Gamora asked, but judging by her tone of voice, she was all out of reassurances.

“No, I'm good now.”

“Good,” she nodded, then pulled him in for a kiss. It was a really good kiss. One that he would've liked to continue forever. But then he realized something, and pulled away all scandalized.

“Wait, who said I was jealous?!” ________

She didn't just stop with the praises there. Even though his insecurities appeared to be assuaged and his cockiness and self confidence levels back up to normal Peter Quill levels, that didn't mean that she had to stop complimenting him. She always loved it when Peter gave her physical compliments in bed. She didn't have to stop complimenting him just because he was back to normal cockiness levels. He was her boyfriend, she could do whatever she wanted with him.

Besides, she liked spoiling him, whether that be lavishing him with her affections, or burying him in sweet words and kisses.

And now that they were both naked, there were a lot of things in sight to give him praises for. So much of his body to appreciate, that she was glad to have for her eyes only now. All hers.

“I guess the rest of the team doesn't get to see this since you've stopped randomly taking off your shirt around the ship in a futile attempt to impress me,” Gamora smirked against his throat, running her hand over his abdominal muscles.

Peter opened his mouth to say something, but she cut in. “And before you ask, no, that is not an invitation for you to start randomly removing your shirt around the ship.”

Peter shut his mouth without making a sound. Because she knew him too well by now.

And she looked entirely too pleased with herself when he shut his mouth without a word in the sorta Oh yeah, I’ve got you down way, or what Peter tends to think of as her I’ve got you figured out face, on account of how that was the only way to read it.

Like oh yeah, I've got your number, boy.

“So no part of you needs to change. I have gained weight too since the team has started. The boys just have more fun teasing you. That and neither of them are stupid enough to say anything about me that could possibly be interpreted as remotely critical. And don't tell me you think Rocket weighs less than he did back when he was living the life of a bounty hunter and escaped convict and living paycheck to paycheck. It is just a fact that most of us weigh more than we did when we first met years ago,” Gamora shrugged, truly untroubled by it. To her, weight gain meant security and safety.

She knew it was also a part of aging. You lived to see another day. She honestly never expected to live long enough to experience the slowing of metabolic processes.

She didn't mention the part about getting older to Peter though, cause she knew he’d freak out if she brought up that aspect.

“The boys just have more fun teasing you. You know they only do it for your reactions, right? Just because they know it bothers you,” Gamora cocked her head, leveling him with a single look.

Peter wanted to say of course he knew that, cause it was so freaking obvious, duh.

But he kinda wasn't thinking that at all, so he made the wise choice not to lie to her and just stayed silent.

“And like I said,” she practically purred as she crawled her way up his body, her lips grazing his collarbone, brushing along his throat, so tantalizing and warm. She sucked just under the junction of his jaw, feeling his pulse race below his skin. He was being so good, so patient for her.

She gave him three kisses. First, his throat. The second on his jaw line. Thirdly was his lips.

The last one was so teasing, pressed to the corner of his lips like petals, and then she just pulled away, like saccharine sweet honey’s dripping from her lips.

Peter’s lips parted, his pupils blown wide. He wanted to kiss her, wanted to bring her lips back down to his. Pull her in.

But he also loved it when she teased him like this.

But he couldn't resist touching her, couldn't keep his hands still. So he didn't bother. Peter’s hands traveled up from gripping her hips, following the curve of her spine, his hands warm and strong, and unbearably gentle. His callouses felt so good when they just barely brushed her skin, the sensations he gave her always made her shiver.

“I am the one whose opinion you should care about,” Gamora informed him decidedly. “And I am very fond of your appearance, Starlord.”

She had to stop herself from chuckling at the way his face lit up at the name, just like she knew it would.

“It’s your body,” she said, kissing down his throat to his chest. Despite her words, the way she was touching him right now- it felt like claiming. And he delighted in that. “Do whatever you want with it.”

Peter's breath hitched when her teeth caught a nipple, one that she soon soothed with her tongue, sucking it in her lips and giving it a swirl before moving onto the next one.

“Whatever you need to do to make yourself feel better. If you wanna do your glamorous muscles thing, whatever”- and Peter had to chuckle right there at her butchering of earth terms - “You should already be confident though,” Gamora murmured, all soft and sultry, tracing the planes of his stomach, his abs, just kept going over the defined muscles with her tongue.

“Just know that I like that you have these,” she said, running her hand over his muscles again, while her tongue melts traveling down, past his navel, “And an abbbbssolutely soft belly.” She nuzzled his stomach before giving him another sharp nip, and Peter squeaked.

“Gamora!”

Gamora gave him an innocent look at his scolding tone, all high pitched and flustered.

“What?” She shrugged. “Couldn't help myself. You're too hard to resist.”

“You really are trying hard to build up my ego, aren't you?” He laughed, cause man, she was laying on the flattery pretty thick now.

“Someone has to do it if you're not gonna do it yourself,” she smirked. “You'll probably go through withdrawals if you're not constantly receiving compliments from someone else, since you've taken the day off of complimenting yourself. I guess I can pick up the slack of stroking Peter's ego for the next 12 hours or so. I know you usually have a monologue going in your head. Plus, I am extremely turned on, and you look so very good right now. So can we get on with this? I want to ruin you.”

“Well then, what the hell are you waiting for?”

They both smiled before she crashed her lips to his.

[bittysvalentines]

About a bo(ner)y

For @polaroidpidge

From @fanaste

Pairing: Kent Parson/Jeff Troy

 __________________

Kent flops down on the bed and it collapses beneath his weight.

 Literally.

 Kent flops down on the bed and it collapses beneath his weight.

 Literally.

 There’s a sharp snap half a second after Kent’s back hits the mattress and then the top right corner drops sending him rolling towards the side table at the head.

Both men freeze…well Kent has to stop rolling first but when he does he stares, stiff bodied, up at Jeff who stares back, wide eyed, and red faced.  Both men blink shocked into silence until Jeff burst into peels of laughter.  It bubbles up from his chest like champagne and Kent would enjoy the sound if he wasn’t so busy worrying about not only what they’re going to tell the hotel but what the other guys are gonna say when they find out.

 Of course, in typical Kent fashion he’s not worrying about the right thing.  The right thing being what Jeff’s going to say.

 “Dude.” Jeff gasps bent double now to emphasise that it’s so hilarious it’s physically killing him, “No stop, stop.” He pants as if Kent is doing anything other than lying on the bed, one hand bracing himself so he doesn’t roll and hit his head on the headboard, and the other gripping the rucked-up comforter.  “I can’t breathe.  Stop.” Jeff wheezes.

 Kent tries to roll the other way but the bed creaks dangerously.  He tries it slower this time, but the creak persists.

 “Dude.” He flaps, “Help me up.”

Jeff shakes his head wildly miming that he can’t.

 “Fuck Swoops just help me up already.  Suffocate on your own time.” Kent snaps though he knows it’ll only make Jeff laugh harder.

 “Oh man.” Making a show of how much effort it is Jeff straightens up and wipes honest to god tears from his eyes, “I can just see the headlines now- “

 “Don’t- “Kent moves but there’s an ominous creak from the left side.

 “Kent Parson, glutes so ginormous standard hotel beds just won’t cut it.”

 Kent dares to flip him off.  “Your ass is bigger than mine man.  The bed was obviously broken before we got here.”

 “No one will believe that.” Jeff threatens.

 “It was!” He squeaks.  “Help me up man, before the Aces have to pay for a new bed.”

 “Pretty sure it’s not gonna break the budget.”

 “Dyson will think we were goofing around and won’t let us share again.”

 Jeff hesitates, and for an awful second Kent thinks he’s gonna shrug like it doesn’t matter, like Kent can share with anyone else.  He knows it wouldn’t be Jeff’s fault if he didn’t know how stressful that would be for Kent but at the same time he finds Jeff’s ignorance (entirely assumed and wholly unsubstantiated) irritating.

 Instead of giving him more shit about being a fuss pot Jeff lopes around to the top of the bed and hoists up the right side so Kent can carefully (soooo careful) but quickly roll off.  When his feet make contact with the carpet he feels like a sailor finally finding land after choppy seas.

 No longer horizontal Kent can survey the scene in it’s ridiculous entirety.

 “Shit.”

 “Maybe if you sleep on the end, like across the bottom?” Jeff puts his hand on the base of the bed and the right bottom leg gives out.  They exchange a look.  “Or not.”

 “The fuck were the people before us doing?

 Jeff shoots him a ‘seriously?’ look.  “Fucking probably.”

 Kent makes a sound in the back of his throat.  “It’s always fucking with you.”

 “You don’t break a bed just by sleeping on it.”

 “They could have been jumping on it…” Kent doesn’t know why he’s fighting with Jeff.  It doesn’t change anything.  “I can’t sleep on that.”

 “Then I guess you better get right with the floor.” Jeff sniggers.

 Kent looks at him brows drawn up in an incredulous arch, “I better what?”

 Jeff doesn’t catch the vibe, “You better,” he throws his bag on his bed which mockingly stays sturdy beneath the weight, “start making a palette on the floor.”

 The statement computes about as well as the first time he heard it.  “Oh no.  No, no, no.” Kent whistles, “I am your captain.”

 Miss the hint once, shame on Kent, miss it twice and shame on Jeff.  Jeff doesn’t miss the implication a second time.  “What?” he does a double take, “No way.  I am not sleeping on the floor!”

 “I am your captain.” Kent repeats.

 “You are also younger than me.  Your back is better! Mine can’t take a hard floor.” He almost sounds smug about it like he’s so sure Kent gives a shit about his old man bones.

 “Captain.” Kent points to himself.

 “Older than you.” Jeff points to himself.

 “Captain.” Kent repeats again.

 “Fuck.  Off.”

 “Suicides or you give me the bed.”

 Jeff’s outrage gives way to genuine uncertainty.  “How about you knock it off man you’re starting to sound like a dick.”

 Reluctantly Kent stops.  He looks at the other bed and then at ‘his’ broken one.  His back aches from rolling across the mattress and his butt and shoulder hurt from sitting on the plane for six hours.  He sleeps like shit on planes he always has and a lifetime of being sent across state and country lines to various family members every holiday hockey would permit his mom hasn’t changed that.  Kent sleeps in total silence, in complete blackness and on a bed that doesn’t make him feel like he’s on a tilt-a-whirl.  He looks at the floor and his muscles groan just imagining the hardness of the ground beneath.

 “I’m gonna have to get another room.”

 Jeff’s unzipped his bag and started to shed his clothes in the time Kent’s taken to reflect on his woes.  “All the rooms are booked up.” Jeff says from inside the collar of his shirt.  Kent’s gaze gets caught on Jeff’s abs.  His eyes briefly follow the trail that his navel hair marks all the way to his waistband and down.  When Jeff frees himself from his clothing Kent’s expression betrays nothing.

 “Seriously?”

 “Yeah.  Dyson picked the smallest hotel he could.  He’s filled it with Aces personnel only.  After the Hudson debacle he isn’t taking any chances.”

 Kent stares, “Debacle?”

 Jeff pulls his pyjama top down, “It’s my word of the day.” He says defensively.

 “Word of the day?” Kent repeats.

 “Jas got me an app on my phone.  It gives me a word to use every- don’t look at me like that you’re just jealous.”

 Like Kent Jeff chose the NHL over college.  It’s not a difficult decision.  When scouts come calling, blowing smoke up your eighteen-year-old ass about money and fame, offering a life of eternal hockey everything else loses its appeal.  Kent doesn’t regret it.  College was never going to be for him, but Jeff does.  Get him drunk enough and he’ll confess that against some of their higher educated rookies he feels like a dolt and with every year that passes he fears his lack of education is going to haunt him.  Kent can imagine Jas passing the app off as a joke so that Jeff could easily accept it without having to admit that using these words makes him feel smart.  Jeff would admit it’s silly really.  The kind of education he missed out on can’t be encapsulated in a random word generating app, but Jas knew it would make him smile.  Kent’s mad he didn’t think of it first.  Not that he’s trying to out romance her or anything…

 Of course, Kent doesn’t let on that he knows any of this and instead replies, “Of sounding like a giant nerd? Hardly.”

 Jeff flips him off, “Whatever man.  What if you took the mattress off?”

 “There’s not enough room on the floor.”

 “You could make a bed out of the blanket and duvet I guess…” Jeff says considering.

 Kent scoffs, “Like a dog?”

 Jeff gives him a smart grin “Exactly like a dog.”

 Kent flips him off.  “I’m not sleeping on the floor, so you better not fidget in the night.”

 “You’ll never know.” Jeff replies decisively.

 Just for that Kent gets into the good bed.  He expects Jeff to run out of the bathroom as if he senses what Kent’s done but instead he hears the thunk of the toilet seat raise and then the familiar sound of Jeff peeing (it brings a certain clarity to your life when you realise the sound of your friends urinating is familiar).

 Face pink from a fresh scrub Jeff emerges from the bathroom.  “You’re not seriously suggesting we share?” He gapes.

 Kent’s more than a little offended that Jeff sounds so horrified.  It makes shrugging unapologetically and simply snapping, “Captain,” in answer, easier.

 “This is an abuse of power!” Jeff declares.

 “There’s no official rule book.  How I captain is my prerogative.” He adds with a sniff.

 The other man makes a protesting noise.

 “Get over yourself Troy it’s one night.”

 Jeff glances at the broken bed, then at the floor, then back at ‘their’ bed.  “Move over Parson.”

Twenty minutes later one six feet and one five feet eleven, both two hundred pounds plus, hockey players are still trying to occupy a small double together.

 “Scooch over!”

 “Ugh you’re such a bed hog.  I’m at the edge!”

 “You are not! I’m hanging off the god damn mattress here.”

 “This bed is too small for the both of us.” Jeff snaps.

 “As your captain I demand you.  Move.  The.  Fuck.  Over.”

 “As a tired man I demand you stop.  Fucking.  Trying to boss me.  Around!”

 “Jeff!”

 “Kent!”

 “You’re impossible.”

 “Turn on your side and you’ll have more room.”

 “I sleep best on my back.” Kent argues.

 “I’ve shared a room with you enough times to know you always end up rolling onto your side.  Just skip a few moves and do it now.”

 “Why don’t you?” Kent snaps brattishly.

 “I will but to fit we’re both gonna need to roll over.”

 There’s a pause and then Kent feels compelled to say, “I’m not spooning you.”

Jeff makes a sound in the back of his throat, “Spare me the no homo bullshit Parson everyone knows you’re a cuddler.”

 “The only thing I cuddle is Kit.”

 “Not according to Watty.”

 “He was cuddling me!” Kent squeaks indignant.

 “Now how he tells it.” Jeff sniggers.

 Kent puts his foot on Jeff’s leg.  “Yow! What the hell? Get your ice toes away from me!”

 “Both of us roll over so we’re back to back.”

 The bed groans as both men turn.  Kent has more of his body on the bed now, but he doesn’t have any less of Jeff’s.  He feels Jeff’s not inconsiderable ass against his and it’s weird.  Too familiar and yet…he doesn’t want to call Jeff out in case he moves.  Besides if he moved they’d be back to their original problem and they can’t face each other because then their dicks would be touching.  Not that Kent is averse to that, he reluctantly admits…okay not reluctant in the sense that he doesn’t want to fancy Jeff but in the sense that acknowledging it makes it harder to deny and, eventually, get over.

 “Don’t hog the sheets.” Jeff says tugging the duvet over his side.

 Kent tugs back, “Don’t fidget.”

 - - - - -

 Kent wakes up with a hard on.  This in itself isn’t unusual.  He’s young, he’s fit, he’s healthy and his libido is incorrigible.

 But this hard on isn’t his.  It’s Jeff’s and its pressed into his ass and Kent doesn’t find it unpleasant.  In fact in that brief liquid moment between sleep and wakefulness he almost pushes himself back into it.  He almost revels in the sensation of the hardness between his cheeks.  Kent almost forgets that he and Jeff don’t share a bed.  They don’t cuddle, or kiss, or rub up against each other in the night.

 As the room solidifies around him he freezes with the reminder that he may be nursing a pretty stupid crush but that’s all it is.  That’s all it’ll ever be.

 Kent spends a few moments taking shallow breaths desperately trying not to move.  He wonders if it’ll go away quickly but it feels like times determined to drag this moment out.  He debates his options.  To physical move will land him one of two places, on the floor or further into Jeff’s embrace.  He knows which one he’d prefer but it isn’t going to happen.

 It can’t.

 The only thing left is to try and wake Jeff, so he takes a deep breath and sighs it out making sure to make it long and loud.  He expands his ribs until they hurt and exhales until his belly touches his back.

 Jeff doesn’t stir so Kent tries again.  Except it doesn’t work, again.  He moves his leg a fraction and it takes barely any distance before it slips out from under the covers to be kissed by the icy lips of the air.  He brings his foot back with a gasp.

 “Dude stop.” A voice croaks behind him.

 Kent jumps and his foot jerks back out into the tundra.  “shit.”

 His exclamation is met with silence and then a mumbled “Crap.” From behind him.  “So that’s happened.” Jeff tries to turn but Kent grips the covers.  “I need to turn over.”

 And I need to avoid frostbite, Kent thinks.  “It’s fine.” He says rushing to reassure him even though a minute ago he was begging to have Jeff’s hard on far from him.  “It happens.” He shrugs striving to sound unbothered.

 “Yeah but- “

 “But what?” Kent prompts only he’s met with more silence.  “But what?” He thinks, “But it’s weird to have a boner in bed with your gay best friend? But it’s weird because you know I’ve got a thing for you, that sometimes I’m terrified I might be in love with you? But it’s weird because you don’t think I can control myself?”.  Kent starts to spiral so he forces himself to close his eyes and imagines shutting the poisonous voice behind a steel door.  “But what?” He asks again his belly clenching in anticipation.

 “It’s not exactly cool to wake up pressing your stiffy into your best friends back.” Jeff says, and he sounds like he’s laughing.  “There’s hardly any room in here as it is.” He snickers.

 Kent’s whole body immediately relaxes.  “It’s not that big.”

 “Oh, you’ve had bigger?” Jeff snorts.

 “Fuck off.” He presses his toe into Jeff’s calf.

 “Ow.” He jerks and knees Kent in the ass.  “Asshole.”

 Kent laughs.

 “I am sorry though.” Jeff says after a beat.

 “Don’t be.  It’s a testament to your youth.”

 Jeff makes a doubtful little noise, “Or a sign of my desperation.”

 Kent doesn’t say anything.

 “Shit I didn’t mean – I didn’t mean that how it sounded.”

 Kent scoffs like a part of him isn’t insulted, “You’d be lucky to attract me Troy.”

 “Whatever,” Jeff says after a moment, “you’re still hung up on Zimmermann anyway.”

 Kent feels the air around them start to shift.  Maybe it’s the hour and the orange glow of the street lamps through net curtains that softens not only the edges of their room but also the edges of their walls, or maybe Kent really does hear the faint sound of mournfulness in Jeff’s voice.  Whatever it is it makes him say, “Not really.”

 “Not really?” Jeff sounds sceptical.  “He seemed pretty important at New Year’s.”

 True.  “I was pretty fucked up at New Year’s.”

 “So now you’re over him?”

 Kent considers this before replying.  Zimmermann was Kent’s first everything.  First friend, first crush, first kiss then love.  First everything.  Jack and Kent used to mean something to each other.  They were always together that even when people spoke about them they spoke about them as a pair.  When Jack went to rehab and cut Kent off completely it felt like his heart had been blown up and his arm torn off.  He alternated between frantic worry and numb disbelief that the boy he loved had abandoned him without a word.

 But then he met Jeff and things changed.

 He can’t even put his finger on how it changed but eventually his zombie days stopped and the frantic worry in his mind only ever came out after too many drinks.  Of course, then he watched Jack Kiss Eric on the big screen in front of his whole team and that knocked him for six, but Jeff was there to help him pick up the pieces (read feed him bread in a bath tub until he sobered up).

That night between retches in the toilet Kent promised to really try and live life ‘after’ Jack Zimmermann.

 The only problem was without Jack to moon over Kent had more time to realise that his feelings for Jeff were changing.

 “Kent? You still awake?” Jeff whispers.

 “Yeah.  And…yeah, I think I’m closer to it now.  Getting over him I mean.”

 “Oh.  Cool…I mean…that’s great.”

 “Yeah.”

 He hears Jeff take a big breath behind him.  “So hypothetically.”

 “Hypothetically? Is that another of your words of the day?” Kent teases.

 Jeff pinches him.  “Hypothetically if this boner was…personal what would that mean?”

 Kent blinks, “What?”

 “Do you really need me to repeat it?” Jeff huffs and Kent can imagine his ears growing red.  He can hear the embarrassment he feels.  But he doesn’t care, well he does but Jeff’s just said something that could potentially change everything.  He needs to be sure of what he’s heard.

 “Yeah I do.”

 “It can be personal if you want.  If you’re, like…into it.”

 “Into it?”

 “Fucking Christ Kent do you need me to spell it out?”

 “Jeff all I know right now is that I woke up with your boner trying to poke a hole in my back and now you’re telling me that it might be personal but only if I want.”

 “That about sums it up yeah.”

 Kent considers this a moment.  “If I don’t? Want it to be personal.”

 “Then you’ll hang onto those covers and when I turn over I’ll try not to fall off the bed.  Then in the morning we’ll pretend this never happened.”

 Kent imagines that being about as possible as him going a whole shift without getting checked by the behemoth that the Kings have collared as defence.  “And if I want it to be personal.”

 “Do you?”

 “Do I what?”

 “Fuck Kent.” Jeff sighs.  “Do you want it to be personal?”

 When Kent pauses this time it’s not because he isn’t sure but because he never let himself dwell on it because Jeff’s straight, and Jeff has a girlfriend right now, a girlfriend that Kent loves and would never want to disrespect.  “What about Jas?” He asks.

 “We’ve talked about it.”

 “You have?”

 “All the time.”

 “Wh- why?” Kent stutters.

 “Because she knows what you mean to me.  She knows that I- “he takes a deep breath, “That I want you.  That I have for a while now.”

 Kent wonders if Jeff’s ‘a while’ is the same as Kent’s a while.

 “Same.” Kent whispers.

 Jeff shifts behind him and the mattress rocks as he props himself up on an elbow, “Really?”

 Kent fights not to turn his head, too afraid of rejection to look Jeff in the eye right now.  “Yeah.”

 “Kent?”

 “Yeah?”

 He feels Jeff’s hand on his shoulder and the next thing he knows he’s on his back and Jeff’s leaning over him and they’re kissing.  It only takes Kent half a second to get with the programme but when he does Kent’s whole body feels it.  Their tongues slide sensually together and Kent’s heart thunders beneath the palm Jeff’s laid on it for balance.

 They break apart slowly, in increments, inch by inch until Kent can see the smile on Jeff’s face.  

 “I’ve wanted to do that for a while.” He confesses.

 Kent blushes.  “Yeah?”

 “Yeah.” Jeff laughs softly.

 Kent breathes into the space between them then says, “What about Jas?”

 “She wants me to be happy.  She wants you to be happy.”

 “And she thinks us together will make that happen?”

 “Yeah.  I think so.  Don’t you?”

 Kent wants to say yes.  Honestly, it’s his first instinct to just agree but he knows himself.  Kent knows what he does to the things that make him happy.  He has a predisposition to ruin.  “Is it okay if I say I don’t know yet?” he asks carefully.

 “I’d be surprised if you didn’t.  I know you Kent.  You don’t believe in happiness.”

 Kent pouts childishly, “I do.”

 “Not for yourself.”

 That’s a truth Kent can’t deny.  “So, about this boner.” Kent says instead.

 “Oh, it’s gone now.”

 “That was short lived.”

 Jeff laughs.  “Well it’s game day tomorrow so it’s probably a good thing.”

 “Oh.  Okay.”

 “Relax we’ve got ages.  Tomorrow we’ll get up and hash it out yeah? Right now, I just wanna sleep with you in my arms.  Sound good?”

 Tomorrow the sun will rise, and the first thing Kent will do is worry that this moment never happened, that the spell of the dark will have worn off and Jeff will pretend this never happened.  In the morning Jeff will reassure him with a kiss, with a lot of kisses and after the game he’ll invite Kent home for dinner where they’ll talk the whole thing to death and when it’s all finalised they’ll kiss and fall into bed together and Kent will eventually know what it’s like to be in a healthy relationship.  But the dawn is four hours away and so right now Kent closes his eyes and cherishes the feel of Jeff’s skin beneath him, of his arm around his shoulder and his lips pressed to his forehead.

[spaceorphan18]

Finding Kurt Hummel: Previously Unaired Christmas

Masterpost

5x08: Previously Unaired Christmas

Look - it’s no secret that I am not a fan of this episode.  It still makes my stomach twist a little for reasons that I can’t entirely articulate (and I suspect are far more personal than any real issue the episode presents).  I know people are split on either loving this episode or hating this episode - maybe doing this will help me figure out what’s really going on.  

I, personally, have two issues with the whole thing. (The second one I’ll explain within the narrative of the episode.)  The first is that it does kind of feel like an FU to pretty much everyone.  I don’t necessarily think it’s to the fans explicitly (though the stuff with Kurt kinda feels like that), but in general, I’m guessing they were forced into a holiday episode that they didn’t really want to do by the network.  Because more so, the nastiness towards Christmas feels like that.  

I also have to wonder if Cory’s passing plays a small part.  I mean - this is cracky Glee - it’s been cracky Glee for a while now.  We just had an episode about puppets, twerking, and dressing up in bizarre Lady Gaga outfits.  The show has been kind of off the rails for most of season 5, and this episode almost feels like the climax of that (after the break - things feel a little more...normal?)  

Anyway - I don’t know exactly how we ended up here - but I kind of wish that Glee didn’t end it’s Christmas run on a, well, whatever this note is.  

Oh! And one last thing.  At this point - season six was not shortened.  I wonder if they had another, more heartfelt, Christmas episode idea for their final one.  Hmmm.  

What If

We open with Jane Lynch talking about how this was a secret hidden away episode.  And I’m bringing it up because this whole set up seemed to confuse everyone.  No - this was most definitely not a lost episode, nor do I think it’s any more or less controversial than anything else they did on the show.  (I do think the writers didn’t give a flying fuck - and were warning about that...)  

However, this whole intro does seem to make things confusing.  Yes - it’s set in season 4.  Yes - I’ll bet they did, at some point, come up with the Rough Trade Santa thing the previous year, and just discarded it until now.  However, shout out to @ckerouac for bringing up the point that -- if Glee wanted to go cracky, they could have gone so much further.  I mean if you’re going to go AU - why not do something entirely wacky.  They kind of did in Glee, Actually with Artie’s fantasy.  So, I’m kind of in agreement.  Why bring it back to season 4 (other than you have newbies you have to deal with).  Why not shoot it into the future, or just switch everyone’s bodies again.  Glee can go that extra mile, why not?  Who knows.  

Meanwhile - I need to state that this did not happen in the main timeline.  It could have (sort of - there are so many continuity errors that it hurts my head).  But it did not.  This is completely AU.  And really, I could skip it if I really wanted to.  I’m going through it just the same because a) for completeness sake - it’d bother me if I didn’t, b) there are some interesting Kurt-meta points that I think are worth bringing up.  

That long winded, probably unnecessary preamble aside - here we go. 

Grandma Moses

So.  We open on the New York side with Santana crashing at the loft, buying Kurt weird doll heads and tickets to Dildo island.  (Are we being edgy yet - the writers ask? Just you wait ;))  Okay, so this scene kind of sets up what the whole New York act is supposed to be about.  It seems they want to address two specific things about Kurt (that I have at least seen in criticisms, and I’m pretty sure the writers did, too)  -- a) That he didn’t have enough of a “normal teenage reaction” to his break up with Blaine and b) that Kurt is an old grandma, desexualized gay.  

Well.  Glee being in its FU mode is going to rectify that - just not in the way that’s going to satisfy anyone (I shouldn’t generalize - I know there are people who love this episode, my regards).  

And - in a FWIW thought, Kurt is an old grandma.  He always has been.  That’s just part of the make up of the character.  

The point, however, of Santana’s little monologue of exposition here is to set the stage for what’s going to happen in the rest of the episode.  It reminds me of the Tattooo Guy in The End of Twerk - telling Kurt that if he’s going to go nuts, he has to go all out.  

[2 asides - 1. Santana is also getting rewritten break up stuff (I’m guessing in response to criticism), as they seem to retcon a ton about the Brittana break up.  2. This whole story seems to be a commentary about Kurt specifically, and not really about Blaine?  Blaine seems to be fine this entire episode - though he’s barely shown because he’s off screen with some weird yule log obsession ;)]  

Meanwhile - Rachel has gotten them all jobs as elves at the mall.  Which - I suppose makes sense.  Oh! And weirdly enough - there’s no discussion from Rachel about her own break up with Finn (which makes sense because of Cory), or about Brody, or Cassie, or any of the stuff that happened to Rachel in season 4.  Weird, right? Nah, she’s just a backdrop to the Kurt and Santana stuff.  I will say - Rachel saying that she’ll be the best Jewish Elf ever made me laugh. 

Bad Santa

Ah, the one highlight of the episode - Chris Kurt in that elf costume.  It was like he was born to play an elf.  Lol 

Anyway - they get to the mall, and Santa’s late, and drunk.  (Not really here for bad santa - but his line about them in an ‘equity card’ mindset had me laughing.)  So, of course Rachel takes charge and they try to calm the audience with Here Comes Santa Claus. It’s -- perfectly fine.  In general, I find the music of the episode, with the exception of Love Child, somewhat uninspired.  Oh, right, this is a musical show, we have to have music.  Here’s a Christmas song.  

Of course, at the end, the kids aren’t charmed - they throw crap at them.  Yeah - we totally didn’t see this happen in season 2.  

I have read some meta about how Kurt, Rachel, and Santana are stand-ins for the writers here -- that whatever they do, it’s gonna get crap thrown at them.  (The thought is echoed at the end, too)  Oh! I have lots of thoughts on this, but I should probably save it for another post, cause it’s not really about Kurt.  

So -- the next day? Later that day? Santana goes and takes a bath...in the loft? I have no idea what the time line is.  I haven’t watched the Lima side of this episode since it aired.  Anyway, Kurt and Rachel call her up and beg her to help them.  Santana gives another obligatory joke about Kurt being an old grandma - born to play Mrs. Claus.  (Um, Santana - I think we’ve established that Kurt was born to be that Elf.)  

Oh - this still says so much....

Santana arrives as Mrs. Claus and proceeds to be a bitch to little people under ten.  Kurt and Rachel rightfully look horrified.  Sorry.  I don’t like this sequence.  It’s mean spirited and awful.  I don’t think it’s funny when adults are mean to innocent kids.  Moving on...

And....then we have the arrival of “Sexy Santa” Cody.  (Dude - this guy is totally skeevy to me -- who arrives at a mall without a shirt? But whatever)  And the rest of this plot line gets played out like half baked smutty fanfiction.  

I will say this -- I do think all of this is completely in character for Kurt.  Remember Ricky Martin in season 3?  This is essentially the same reaction from Kurt.  Kurt finds lots of guys attractive -- and he is allowed to react to it.  (And we’re in cracky mode - this is totally played up for laughs, in the same way it was when Ricky Martin guest starred.) 

This is also not one of my issues with the episode. 

Anyway - Cody wants to “get to know” his elves before he helps them.  Ew.  Kurt those abs are clouding your judgment, buddy. 

That Godawful Chipmunk Song

Santana once again reminds Kurt that he’s a stick in the mud and convinces him to spike his own eggnog.  And then Cody arrives.  Again.  Shirtless.  **rolls eyes**  And obviously scoping out the place so he can rob it.  Maybe that’s part of the reason I can’t really get on board with Kurt hooking up with him.  Cause it’s obvious that this guy is gross and going to be bad.  Yuck. 

Anyway, we all know what a light weight Kurt is - and within a few sips of cooking sherry and eggnog, he’s all flirty mcdrunk pants.  

So - this whole Chipmunk thing - in bulletted form because my brain is currently working better that way... 

I, personally, think this song is dumb.  Sorry.  

It creates this super weird adult/kid vibe between Cody and the loftmates, which I find uncomfortable.  

Cody is obviously playing this all up because he’s going to rob them - which makes his actions later really awful.  

Trashed Kurt with anyone else (especially Blaine, but anyone really) would have been hilarious in just about any other context.  

Chris, obviously, had a lot of fun filming this - so I’ll let him have that.  

The point where SO goes on her diatribe - so feel free to skip

Oh, where to start.  

1. Cody is taking advantage of a incredibly drunk, barely legal teenager in order steal from him. I don’t think the writers put a whole lot of thought into it -- other than saying ‘hey, we can make Kurt a sexual creature’, but I do think it was kind of in bad taste. 

2.  I wasn’t personally offended by it - but there were a lot of people who were (especially when it gets to the being tied up, and Kurt telling Cody no), and a lot of people telling them to get over it because it was cracky glee.  The whole hoopla over that in fandom has always left a bad taste in my mouth.  

3. Gross Cody stuff aside, no I don’t think this is out of character for Kurt.  Kurt’s in a bad place about breaking up with Blaine -- and after being pushed by Santana hard enough, having enough alcohol in him, and being presented with the opportunity, Kurt’s trying to get out of his shell a bit and enjoy himself.  He’s perfectly right to do so, and I do think it makes sense that someone going through a hardship like a rough break up with a first love would try something new -- especially being a first time college student with no limitations. 

4. What about “you matter” and baby penguin Kurt?  Well - first of all, I don’t think Kurt has ever been a baby penguin, and I’m going to spend a lot of the second half of season 5 talking about Kurt being very much a sexual being.  I also think that Kurt does and will always be particular about sex -- again, the writers had to get Kurt incredibly drunk and in a very specific situation for this to even present itself.  I don’t think it’s that Kurt can’t (or won’t) have casual sex, but more so that it means more to him when it’s with someone he loves.  Had this not been a throwaway episode intent on being offensive and cracky, that thought might have been explored. 

5. It cracks me up that they kind of even half-assed Kurt being a sexual being.  Sure, Cody’s half naked in-between Kurt’s legs.  It’s more of a slight of hand, though.  The kissing is a) cut away from very quickly, and b) barely kissing (the first part when Santana and Rachel come in isn’t really even kissing - it’s like stage kissing, where you kiss their cheek, it looks like making out, but it’s not).  The whole thing looks way more provocative than it really is. 

6. I do think it’s unfortunate that they didn’t let Kurt be this provocative and flirty (and handsy) with anyone else on the show.  I do think Kurt has hotter moments (with Blaine - in various episodes, I can name them for you if you like).  But the whole being overtly sexual and gay and somewhat naked is limited throughout the show (this goes for Brittana, too, for that matter, and even the Quinn/Santana hook up - they were mostly covered and a good four feet from each other on that bed). 

6B. As an aside, though -- Glee doesn’t do overtly sexual very often, and nearly every time they do it’s for comedy.  It makes me wonder if there was some kind of limitations in general.  I mean, Finchel never got a mostly naked sex scene either - though Blaine and Brittany did -- for comedy.  

7. I do think there’s an interesting story about season 4 Kurt dealing with his break up -- which would have included more intimate moments with Adam, and/or other people.  But that wasn’t the story they chose.  

7B. I do think, ultimately, this was the writers saying - well we could have written that story - but we prefer the one we are doing.  I think it’s in part of the whole FU thing they were going for.  I mean, even for people who wanted to see Kurt get more action -- he’s going to get punished for it in a sec, so even that feels like a bit of an FU.  

Moving on... the next morning Santana and Rachel wake up to find that they’ve been robbed and Kurt is tied up.  

Kurt does say that when he said no to a sexual thing - Cody got aggressive and tied him up.  That is leaning on sexual assault there, show.  Again - I’m not personally offended, but I also don’t think it’s funny either.  

Oh, as an aside I want to mention the whole thrown in joke there about Kurt being sexy to kiss because it’s like he has no kiss (geez, is it just me or is there a blow job joke in there somewhere?) it is a comment on Chris’s physical attributes.  So, calm down people when we get to Santana’s rant in season six.  Every character gets pot shots about their looks. It’s part of being an actor in general.    

Go Feel Shame

It’s...the next day? And Kurt’s talking to Santana (seeming much more Kurt like than the rest of the episode) about how he just wanted to let loose and feel better.  (Well, alcohol rarely helps with that kiddo - but it’s a lesson nonetheless.)  It’s interesting that he says he feels ashamed (he shouldn’t - but I can see why he would).  And he also doesn’t want Blaine to know, ever.  (An odd comment for something that is an AU)  

I do understand some people’s thoughts that they wished Kurt had had a better experience about letting loose a little (and in some ways he did -- I mean that was what The End of Twerk was about).  And I agree in that not every poor decision in your life needs to be met with shame and being robbed.  

But I do think it’s also Glee’s way of saying - hey, we did hear you - and we’re going to continue to tell the story our way.  

They all look really lovely in this scene.  Rachel has a new gig for them - singing behind a wall of glass.  

It’s the fourth wall -- Kurt, Santana, and Rachel are the writers again.  It’s probably better that they stay there for their own safety.  But also - this episode is what happens when that wall is broken down between creators and fandom - a weird mess of....whatever this is.  

Oh! One last final side thought -- no, there’s no Klaine duet.  That doesn’t bother me within the context of this story - it wouldn’t have made sense anywhere.  That said, I’m sorry they didn’t get a final duet.  I think Winter Wonderland would have been a nice conclusion for them.  Let’s take a moment and lament that there was no season six Christmas episode to end on a high note with. 

Time to move on to the regular story at hand.