#i can't quite express the way everyone involved seems to want us to love the show

[obsidianbit]

I love this gay ass show with its literally life ending injuries that heal immediately, but only when convenient to the plot, and its ridiculous use of modern phrases, and its laughing in the face of historical accuracy, and its kissing the face of the fans instead of trying to outwit them, and the way everyone involved in the show seem to go 'I KNOW RIGHT! I'M EXCITED TOO!' instead of mocking the fans

[lucy90712]

could write about rúben is jealous at your used to be uni crush when you accidentally met him at party rúben ended up being protective and a bit cranky (or clingy), fluff at the end. thanks <3

WC: 2.4k After a very long gruelling season everything is finally done and Ruben and the rest of the Man City team have a lot to celebrate after winning the champions league to complete the treble. This season has been hard on everyone including me as Ruben has been so busy and stressed that there was a period of time where we barely saw each other and whenever we did all we did was argue. Thankfully we made it through that time and now we are closer than ever which I'm so glad about as I was really worried I was going to lose him but that's all behind us now. 

Tonight we get to celebrate everything the team has achieved as Jack invited Ruben and I out to a nearby club to enjoy a night off. Ruben isn't usually one to go clubbing but this time he seemed more than happy to go as I think he wanted to go out and enjoy himself after everything he's worked hard for this year. He deserves it too Ruben has been so dedicated to the team the entire year and I've never seen him work quite this hard which is saying something as he always gives 100% to anything he does. As much as it's been difficult at times it's been amazing to be involved in this incredible year for the team and for Ruben. 

Despite agreeing to this a few days ago Ruben neglected to tell me until this afternoon but luckily for him I'm not high maintenance at all so I'm happy to get ready in an hour if I have to. Straight after Ruben decided that I needed to know about our plans I ran upstairs to shower as he dragged me to the gym this morning and I've been too tired to move since. I took a nice long shower washing my hair and shaving so I felt good as you can't look good if you don't feel good. By the time I was done Ruben was in our bedroom shirtless looking at his wardrobe to find a top to wear which was a beautiful sight as not only does he look amazing without a shirt on but I absolutely love his concentration face and that's the expression he had looking at all of his clothes. He didn't notice me to begin with but then I stepped on the one creaky floorboard and of course that caught his attention and his concentration face changed into a smile. 

"Seeing as you're here do you want to help me pick an outfit?" I asked Ruben 

"Of course I do now what criteria do I have to meet" he laughed 

"Well it's not cold as it's summer so warmth doesn't need to be considered so it is completely up to you" I said 

"Well then I think you have to wear this one" he said pulling out a red dress which happens to be his favourite 

"Ooh tonight must be a special celebration if I you want me to wear this" I teased 

"I just want to see my beautiful girlfriend looking and feeling her best" he said 

"Thank you babe" I said

"Plus I feel like making some guys jealous that you're all mine and not theirs" he smirked as he left to go into the bathroom 

I got myself ready in record time with a bit of help from Ruben in putting my jewellery on and zipping up my dress. He also did my shoes up for me which I said wasn't necessary but he did it anyway. With that we were both ready to go so Ruben drove us to the club as he's not going to drink he did that after the champions league win and made me promise to never let him drink again. I'm not a huge drinker either but on occasion I will have a few and I plan for tonight to be one of those occasions as I think I deserved to have some fun plus Jack will probably have me doing shots within a few minutes of our arrival anyway. 

As soon as we arrived Ruben led me over to the vip section of the club where everyone that was coming was already sat. Straight way the other wives and girlfriends came over and took me over to their table to catch up as we haven't seen each other in ages. Ruben brought me a drink a few minutes after we had sat down but after that he left me to talk to my friends. That's something I love about Ruben he doesn't have to be by my side at all times he's happy to let me have fun by myself but somehow he's always there when I need him. 

I enjoyed catching up with the girls but I wanted to spend some time with Ruben so I collected him and made him come to the dance floor with me. Neither of us are great dancers but I always enjoy dancing with him so we always dance together and just forget about what anyone else thinks of us. His arms went straight round my waist and I rested mine on his shoulders as we both swayed to the music. Ruben had a devilish smile on his face as we were dancing together and he made it very clear what he wanted in the way he started kissing my neck and gripping my waist tighter but I'm not going to give in that easy. 

After a while of dancing the both of us wanted a break so we stood by the bar so we could have some space. As we were stood there I thought I saw someone I recognised then he turned around and my suspicions were confirmed. It was a guy I met while I was in university we were friends throughout my studies but I had a huge crush on him so when we finished uni and he brought his girlfriend to graduation we drifted apart and I got on with my own life. We haven't seen each other since graduation and it's been years since I've even thought about him so it was weird to see him in a random club in Manchester. Seeing as I studied in London it felt very random but that being said I always love seeing people from uni as I feel like I've changed so much since then and I love hearing how everyone's life has unfolded. 

"What are you looking at?" Ruben asked 

"Oh there's just a guy over there that I went to uni with" I said 

"Which one?" He asked

"The blonde guy Joey I can't believe I used to have a crush on him" I laughed 

"Wait you had a crush on that guy" Ruben questioned 

"Yeah a huge crush but he brought his girlfriend to graduation which crushed me so that ended that" I said

Ruben went to say something else but before he could Joey noticed me and made his way over with a smile on his face. He greeted me with a hug before he introduced himself to Ruben before shaking his hand. Ruben is usually more than happy to meet people new people especially people I know from before I met him but for some reason he just seemed off. As soon as he let go of joey's hand his arm went back around my waist almost protectively and I could see that his jaw was tensed. It's so unlike Ruben that I had no idea what was wrong with him I mean surely he can't be jealous I've been with him for 3 nearly 4 years now and I’ve not seen Joey for even longer than that. It's not like I still have any feelings it was a stupid crush anyway he was just the only guy that had ever paid me any attention at the time so that's why I liked him so much. 

"It's been so long now have you been?" I asked 

"I've been good I just got a new job here in Manchester so I'm out with a few new coworkers what have you been up to I feel like I haven't seen anything of you since graduation" Joey said 

"Life's been good busy but good I got a job here in Manchester straight out of uni which is how I met Ruben and since life has been pretty crazy with traveling to games all over the place" I said hoping mentioning Ruben would make him less tense 

"Thats amazing I knew you would do great things you were always the smartest one in the class" Joey said 

"Also congrats on the treble mate it's an insane achievement" he added 

"Thanks" Ruben replied rather coldly 

I ignored his attitude and kept chatting to Joey as I'm probably not going to see him again for another few years after this as that's just how life is. The longer I kept talking the more Ruben moved his arms around my waist and held me tighter to his chest. It was so weird seeing Ruben act like this he's usually never the jealous or overly protective type he only ever got jealous one time when this guy was flirting with me before we were officially dating. I could almost feel Ruben's dislike for Joey and I wasn't even looking at him which is also weird as he always tries to get along with everyone he meets as he's just they type of person but clearly in this situation the Ruben I know and love has disappeared. For some reason it was making me feel slightly angry that Ruben couldn't even attempt to see that Joey's a nice guy instead he has to embarrass me by acting like an asshole when all I want is to portray him as the loving boyfriend he really is. 

Joey offered to buy us drinks and seeing as I'd only had 1 so far I accepted and of course Ruben declined but again I could feel his anger at me for even accepting. At this point I was completely fed up with his attitude so I ignored him and his many attempts to get my attention or stop me talking to Joey. I know this will probably cause an argument later but I'm simply just catching up with an old friend who I haven't seen in years and I'm not going to let Ruben ruin that just because he's jealous or whatever he's feeling. 

It was lovely catching up with Joey but after a while he had to get back to his new co workers and of course Ruben took his chance to say we should get back to his teammates before quickly dragging me back to where everyone else was stood. Seeing as he'd let go of his death grip on me I managed to slip away from him and go back to the girls ass I needed their advice and also a bit of time to calm down before I yell at Ruben and say things I don't mean. The girls were really helpful as they told me that Ruben was being over the top but they helped me see his side of the situation by saying that I wouldn't like it if Ruben made me talk to girls he liked before me. I understood what they were saying and it made me feel a bad so I decided it was time to leave to go and talk to Ruben. 

Once I suggested we leave Ruben was more than happy to go so I followed him back out to the car where he seemed to be a lot happier and more relaxed than he was earlier. He held my hand and we sung along to music together which is a lot more like the Ruben I know and love although there was still a bit of unresolved tension in the air but soon that will all be resolved. When we made it home both of us changed into more comfortable clothes and settled down on the sofa with a movie on but I quickly took the remote and paused the movie so we could talk. 

"Is everything alright?" Ruben asked 

"Everything's fine I just think we need to talk about what happened earlier at the club" I said 

"It's fine y/n I'm over it" he said pretty unconvincingly 

"You might say you're over it but I still think we should talk about it so first I want to say I'm sorry for putting you in that position I know I wouldn't like it if you did the same to me I just saw him and wanted to catch up as it's been long but I'm sorry for that" I explained 

"Now you can tell me what's on your mind" I said 

"It's not necessarily the fact that you used to have a crush on him it's just he's so different to me I mean he's blonde with blue eyes and I'm the opposite of that and you said you had a huge crush on him and that just made me question why you love me" he said 

"Oh Ruben I only had a crush on him as he was the first guy to ever be kind to me but then I met you I realised that it was just a crush and nothing more as my feelings for you were so different to what I felt for Joey it was love I love you and only you Ruben" I said 

"That really means a lot to hear because I felt exactly the same when I met you I'm sorry I got so jealous it was silly of me but believe me I won't ever forget what you just said to me" he smiled 

"Good because I want you to know that I love you at all times" I said 

He leaned in to give me a kiss but once our lips connected he pushed me down onto the sofa and began tickling my sides. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing even if I wanted to so I had to pull away from the kiss which made Ruben chuckle too. Any tension or bad feelings were gone within and instant after that and we were back to being completely in love with each other which is how I always want us to be. 

[durrtydawg]

Fructose (Sam Drake x F!Reader)🍓

Summary: A 'normal' life isn't all bad. Especially when it involves a picnic in a secluded part of a nature reserve, gorgeous natural lighting, and plenty of strawberries- they're an aphrodisiac, apparently.

Just a short, sweet (pun unintended), smutty one-shot that I wrote in two hours to procrastinate from anything and everything else I should be doing.

No, I haven't proof-read. Yes, I know you can tell.

Warnings: smut (albeit nothing crazy), 18+ please x

“Where is everyone? All the horrible... screaming kids and their long-suffering parents?”

“C’mon, you know I’m good at weaselling out private spots. You really think I’d put you through that? Or myself, for that matter?”

“Fair.”

“God, I love this weather.” You sigh whimsically, hopping out of the car, closing the door behind you as you bask in the warmth of the late-afternoon. Sam nods, pushing his sunglasses from his forehead down to his eyes. “Sunny, but not too hot. Light breeze-”

“Southwesterly winds, ten miles per hour— you know, I was unaware I was dating a weather girl.”

You raise your brows at his know-it-all grin. “Oh? You’ll also be dating a pro-boxer soon if you’re not careful.” With a smug smile, you make your way to the back of the car, holding the keys between your teeth, opening the trunk as Sam holds up his hands in defence with mouth curled into an amused grin.

“Think fast.” You catch his attention, talking through your teeth as you toss a rolled up blanket in his direction. Removing the keys from your mouth, you lock the car, muttering a ‘let’s go’, with a self-satisfied smile on your face.

Sam catches the blanket with ease, giving you a playful salute with his free hand. “Caught, boss. Lead the way.”

As you amble into the secluded meadow, a sense of tranquillity washes over you. The tall grass dances in the gentle breeze, the sunlight filtering through the leaves of the nearby trees, casting dappled shadows on the ground around you. You had picked this spot for a reason – to help Sam relax and enjoy the simple pleasure of doing absolutely nothing.

You dictate a spot, and he spreads out the chequered blanket, though unfortunately, that aforementioned sense of tranquillity hasn’t quite transferred to Sam. He can't seem to sit still; his leg bouncing slightly as he scans the surroundings. You frown at him, knowing his restless nature all too well. You decide to give him time, instead fishing into the bag to retrieve some of the things you’ve packed.

Once everything is laid out, you settle down on the ground, leaning back on your elbows and soaking in the natural beauty around you. Sam, however, still can't seem to sit still. He fidgets, shifting positions, and tapping his fingers against his knee.

You smirk at his restlessness. "Hey, remember the plan today," you say softly, a playful glint in your eye. "No checking your phone, no fidgeting, no damn smoking. Just us, the field, and a whole lot of relaxation."

You put emphasis on the last word, narrowing your eyes in an accusatory expression.

He looks at you as if you’ve said something ridiculous. “I- I am relaxed.”

You scoff, shaking your head as you get up onto your knees. “Nope. I’ve seen military lieutenants more relaxed than you, Samuel.” You say, hobbling behind him and bracing your hands on his shoulders. “You’re more tense than a damn bomb disposal unit. God, I thought you’d have wanted to actually chill out and enjoy spending some time with me before you ditch me in aid of another piece of old junk.” You say into his ear, digging your fingers into his trapezius as you infiltrate your speech with a lilt of teasing castigation.

“Old junk that pays the bills.” He sighs, turning his neck sideways as if to give you better access to the knots in his shoulders. Your thumb digs into a particularly tense spot, and you watch his nose crinkle as he winces at the ache.

“Loosen your shoulders.” You instruct, raising an authoritative brow towards him, which he sees in the corner of his vision. With a slight eye roll, he makes an effort to do as he’s told, slumping slightly into you as you continue to dig away at the knot. “Good boy.” You joke, feeling him grin in response as you peck his cheek.

As you feel the tension begin to give, a small hum of satisfaction slips out of Sam’s mouth, signalling the knot has dissipated enough for you to pull away. “We’ve got no agenda. Nothing to do. Nowhere to be.” You speak softly, crawling back around to the spot you were sitting in a moment ago. “You, sir, severely need to master the art of mitigating unnecessary stress.” You clasp your hands together before hovering over the selection of goodies you’d prepared. “Let’s start with something to eat.”

He sighs again, this time a genuine and slightly apologetic smile on his lips. He adjusts his sunglasses, before sitting up straight and showing interest in what’s in front of him.

“What’s on the menu, chef?”

You smile at the sight of him physically beginning to relax before you turn to the goods. “So— nothing exciting— a few veggies and some hummus, some of that focaccia I made the other day, a couple of cookies… oh…” You start, biting your lip in an attempt to restrain your excitement, “I stopped off at the farmer’s market on my way to work yesterday, and picked up some of those strawberries you were eyeing up last week.” You lean forwards to pick up the punnet. “Let me tell you, it took every ounce of willpower not to galvanise the lot on my way home. You’re a lucky guy.”

His shoulders jolt as he chuckles, his eyes lingering on you rather than the fruit. “I sure am.” You watch his eyes squint slightly, some sort of thought flashing through his mind. Sam's glance lowers he takes in the spread. “You really went all out, didn't you?"

You nod proudly, shifting until you’re beside him.

“I hope I’ve, uh, not forgotten some sort of… milestone or anything.” He laughs, rubbing the back of his neck.

You shake your head, a small chuckle leaving your lips. “Just wanted to take your mind off of things— to make sure you had no excuse to be restless today. And if that means forcing you into a food coma, so be it.”

Sam leans in closer, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispers, "Well, I can think of one distraction I wouldn't mind."

You blush slightly, ignoring the familiar warmth spreading through, instead choosing to swat his arm. “Behave yourself."

He laughs at the sight of the warmth spreading over your cheeks, before reaching for a stick of cucumber. “You,” he taps it on the tip of your nose, “are too good to me.”

You laugh, wiping the residue off with the back of your hand as he takes a bite of the cucumber. “Yeah, don’t you forget it, toots.” You respond with a teasing smile, mimicking his accent to the best of your ability before removing the film from the pot of hummus and dipping your own cucumber slice into it.

After watching Sam scarf down at least seventy-five percent of the food without taking so much as a breath, you find yourselves lying side by side on the blanket, fingers interlaced as you gaze up at the sky. The gentle rustling of the grass and the distant hum of wildlife that surrounds you— give or take the odd mosquito you both fight over clapping to death— otherwise creates a peaceful cocoon for just the two of you.

Sam turns his head to look at your fingers as you absentmindedly trace circles over his forearm, a soft smile playing on his lips as you look at the small streaks of clouds dotted above you. “Hate to say it…but you were right.” You raise an eyebrow back at him, waiting for him to elaborate. “I needed this. You. Me. A whole lotta’ nothing.”

Feeling a deep sense of contentment, and perhaps a little smugness, you lay your head on his shoulder, humming in agreement. “See? Normalcy. Not all bad.” You get up onto your elbow, twisting for the punnet of strawberries. “You’re so chilled out, in fact, that you forgot-” You pause, biting the tip off of a strawberry before holding it above Sam’s lips, “about these.”

He grins up at you, opening his mouth and biting the rest of the strawberry off of its stem, placing a kiss onto your fingers as he chews. You throw the stem into the grass, before taking one of your own and eating it, sitting up to take in the hues of pink and orange appearing in the horizon; the sun begins to dip beneath it, casting a warm, golden glow over the meadow.

It’s all so peaceful and insanely rare for the two of you to spend so long doing so little together, so you take a moment to embrace the nothingness; The sound of trees rustling in the gentle breeze, the crickets beginning to chirp in the distance, the sound of a camera shutter going off…

“No!” You grunt, turning to Sam as he holds his phone discreetly facing you.

“No, no, no, hold that pose.”

“What- what pose? No! Screw off!” You swat your hand in his direction, trying to grab his phone off of him as he presses the button again. You climb on top of him, snatching his phone out of his hand, straddling his torso as you feverishly swipe for the gallery in order to prevent the photos from ever seeing the light of day. “God, I look awful- don’t-” You squeak out in surprise as Sam uses his size to his advantage, grabbing you by the waist, and pushing you onto your back, making light work of pinning your arms above your head in order to reclaim his phone.

“Absolutely not.” He shakes his head, wrestling his phone out of your hand and shoving it back into the pocket of his jeans as you writhe in protest. You attempt once more to pull your arms from his grip, rolling your eyes with a sigh once it proves futile. He looks down at you, chuckling at the heat rising through your face.

“My girl looks like a painting. I wanted a picture. And… I finally figured out how to focus stuff properly on that damn phone. Do not take that away from me.” He raises a brow as if to chastise you.

“But they were awful!” You whine. “All double chin and celluli-mph!” With a shake of his head, Sam unceremoniously shoves a strawberry into your mouth.

“Mmm. That’s better.” He smirks down at you as you frown and reluctantly begin to chew at the strawberry that’s slightly too big for your mouth. His thumb captures the juice that dribbles its way out of the corner of your lips, and your frown falters a little as he pushes it back into your mouth with a chuckle, effectively silencing you. Much to his amusement, your cheeks redden even more, as his hand gently squeezes them; his other hand effortlessly— irritatingly, rather— keeping your wrists above your head. “Wouldn’t want to pollute such gorgeous surroundings with your whining, now, would we?”

“You got leaves in my mouth.” You grumble through your squished cheeks, unable to hide the small smile growing on your lips as he finally lets go.

“Aww, sweetheart,” he goads with a teasing pout, gently nudging his nose against yours “Want me to get rid of ‘em for you?”

“Shut up.” You laugh, swallowing the remainder of the fruit as he pecks your lips.

He hovers above you, grin softening into a thoughtful smile as his eyes take in every sun kissed freckle on your face. “Thank you.” His hand pulls away from your wrists, removing his sunglasses before coming to rest softly on your jaw.

Your brows furrow.

“For what?”

He closes his eyes for a second, almost as if he doesn’t want to speak. He does, regardless, a slight flush on his face. “For giving me a soft place to land.” He’ll never be fully comfortable with this wishy-washy relationship stuff, but he’s making an effort, and you’ll forever appreciate that.

You smile up at him, your hands coming down to cup his cheeks. “I could turn that into a self-deprecating joke…” you start, but swiftly continue as Sam narrows his eyes at you, “…But I… sense this is the wrong moment for that.”

“Damn right it is.” He says, dipping down once more to kiss you. This time it lingers, eyes closing and thumbs stroking skin as he savours the strawberry-tinged sweetness of your lips.

His teeth pull gently at your lower lip, parting them just enough for his tongue to meet yours as he smirks into the kiss. Your fingers tangle into his hair, tugging lightly in order to keep the gap closed.

One hand kneads at your thigh, and it’s not until he begins to slide it up further that you break the kiss for a moment, holding him just shy of your face.

“We can’t.” You bashfully whisper, lips wet, cheeks hot.

“Why not?” He smirks.

You laugh, looking up at him as if he’s a total idiot. “What if someone sees?”

“No one’s gonna see. There hasn’t been a sign of anyone for over an hour.” He retaliates, continuing to softly knead at your thigh. You bite your lip, eyes anxiously darting around as Sam takes in your expression. His hand shifts up further, magnetising your glare towards him.

“Hey, you say the word, and I’ll stop.” He shrugs above you, thumb stroking at your inner thigh. “But, personally, I don’t see the need.”

You swallow, lips parting to speak, but as his fingertips find the hem of your underwear, any potential words fail you.

“You know,” he speaks low, the whole mood taking a drastic shift, “I’ve also gotta thank you for wearing a dress for once.” He plants a kiss just under your ear, making you shiver. “Not only do you look so, so pretty,” You roll your eyes again as he speaks, biting your lip to dilute your coy smile as his fingers hook around the waistband, “but also, the easy access is really something I could get used to.”

“Christ, you’re awful.” You finally grumble, giving in completely, hurrying to pull him back down to you in a heated kiss as he rolls your underwear down your thighs.

“And you’re already soaked. So, clearly, I'm not that bad.” He says, barely paying your clit any attention as he gathers a little of your slick onto his fingers, before he slides them knuckle deep inside you, in turn, drawing a choked gasp from your throat.

“Jesus- Don’t… hold back or anything.” You say, voice breathless and sarcastic, instantly earning another smirk from Sam.

“I don’t intend to, doll.” He grins, coming back down for another kiss as he curls his fingers, coaxing perfectly against your g-spot. Your soft groan permeates the kiss, your hands drifting down to his belt buckle, making light work of it before you go for the button. “Someone did a quick one-eighty, didn’t they?” Sam chuckles as you reach inside his jeans, beginning to palm him over the remaining layer of fabric keeping him covered.

“Shush.” You murmur, pulling his cock out of his boxers, fully wrapping your fist around him.

“But it’s true.” He chuckles back, burying his face into the crook of your neck as you begin to jerk him off, inhaling the sun cream and perfume concoction that gorgeously complements your natural scent. It drives him insane.

“You give it all this ‘we can’t’ nonsense, but this is what you really want, isn’t it?” He swallows, chuckling to himself again as he places an open-mouthed kiss on your neck. “You want to be fingered in the middle of a public field, where aaanyone could walk by and see me treat you like a filthy little whore, huh?”

His sudden shift in tone has you flush faster than ever, a gargled sound rising from your throat as your hairs stand on end and his thumb brushes against your clit. Your chest rises and falls much more rapidly as he turns more crass, and his cheeky demeanour becomes much more presiding. You’re riling him up just as much as he’s getting to you.

And you did a one-eighty? He’s one to talk.

“Answer me, sweetheart.” He speaks into your ear, teeth gently pulling on your earlobe as your hand squeezes around him harder. He pulls himself up more as if to take the sight of you beneath him in; Sam’s teeth graze against his bottom lip as he sees your breath hitch, the sudden, needy tightening of your fingers in his hair, a silent but obvious plea to further the motions. And he gives you what you want, adding a third digit just to see you squirm. God, how pretty you look all stretched out around him. His smug grin teases you as he jokes about adding one more. About how greedy his girl is.

“C’mon, tell me what you want.” he spurs, cock twitching in your hand in response to your whines and the feeling of your pussy clenching around his fingers.

“This.” You whimper, squeezing him hard for emphasis. “You.”

He could keep dragging this out, tease you a little more, make you beg, but, as much as he hates to admit it, he urgently wants you too. You look so sweet- so appetising- like one of those strawberries- and he has to satiate the need to feel that delicious stretch of your core around him.

So with a grunt, he scoops you up, fingers still working your cunt as he pulls you into his lap. Hand on the small of your back, he ruts the other even faster, drawing out more gasps and moans that you’re not even attempting to keep hushed any more. Dog walkers be damned. This is your fucking meadow.

You can’t help but curse loudly as his thumb assaults your clit, knees trembling either side of his thighs as he keeps you spread open. Your head falls onto his shoulder, hands bracing themselves on his upper arms as your composure is all but failing to remain in place, though before too long, he’s nudging your head upright with his own, wanting to see every facial expression he’s giving you.

“You wanna cum on my fingers or on my cock?” He breathes, missing the stimulation of your hand, secretly wishing for the latter. You’re biting your lip, feeling way too stimulated to form a sentence without making a fool of yourself, so you paw at his wrist- it's enough of a signal that his wish is about to be granted. He gives you a few more thrusts of his fingers before pulling out of you, and you tremble with want, hating the sudden emptiness.

The emptiness, of course, doesn’t last long. He jerks himself a few times, giving you a few seconds to catch your breath before he pulls you forwards, lining himself up and letting you lower yourself onto him. He lets out a long-held breath, groaning a little as he stretches you out and feels you give around him, tight and warm. Your nails dig into his biceps as he bottoms out, your throat tightening as you take him to the hilt.

“Three fingers, and you’re still so damn tight, princess.” He teases, still giving you a moment to adjust. You let out a breathy giggle, feeling the warm evening breeze tickle your hot cheeks as Sam rummages beside the pair of you.

You watch with heavy-lidded eyes as his hand, half-coated in your arousal, brings another strawberry to your lips. You look into his eyes, and he gives you a small nod, watching with fascinated lust as he presses the berry to your parted lips. You open your mouth slightly, just enough for him to push it in, and he can’t help but lick his lips as he watches you take a bite, your tongue lapping up the juice from the strawberry, as well as his fingers, your gentle moans sending vibrations through his forearm as you do so.

"Such a pretty girl." Sam mutters, testing the waters with a gentle thrust upwards. Your eyes flutter shut as he keeps your mouth filled, and you continue to softly lap at and suck every part of the strawberry as he takes the lead again, bouncing you on his dick as you savour the sweetness of the fruit and the tang of your own juices.

You moan loudly as he speeds up, hitting deeper still as you arch your back a little, hips rocking to stimulate your aching clit.

Sam lets out a low chuckle as a dribble of watery-red flows down your chin, leaving a pink stain on the bust of your dress.

He takes the opportunity to grab you by the throat, almost violently pulling you into another kiss as he feels you swallow the strawberry. He groans at the taste of his favourite fruit and his favourite girl, tongue exploring every inch he can reach within your mouth as you grind yourself onto him rougher.

His other hand moves from the small of your back, unable to decide on where to land- a clear sign that he's fast-approaching his peak. He gropes and strokes wherever he can whilst his other hand keeps your mouth firmly against his own, and as you push your upper body harder against him, he pulls you down too, now straddled over him as he lays on his back.

Desperate to feel his skin, your arm snakes under his raglan shirt, absorbing the feeling of every hair, every scar, every bit of soft or firm you can reach, whilst your other reaches between the two of you, sandwiched between your bodies as you find your clit to bring yourself where you want to be even faster.

The two of you can barely fucking breathe, but you don't care. You could pass out-- die, right here, and never would you have felt better.

Sam loosens his grip on your throat, wet, pink-stained lips parting to let out a rare, and fucking beautiful whimper as his arms desperately embrace you, clamping you down on top of him as you rock your hips back and forth like your life depends on it.

When he fills you, you almost cry; the feeling of him twitching, spilling everything into you, and just knowing you're the one that's brought him to that ecstacy makes you feel more adoration for Sam than you could ever express with words.

And then you cum. Laying flat on top of him as a rush of heat floods you in your entirety, the spasming of your core making him hiss in overstimulation but equal adoration as his fingers dig into the clammy nape of your neck.

You finally still, bar the shared heavy breathing, making your bodies rise and fall in tandem.

Seconds pass. Minutes, even, and you're dangerously close to drifting off.

"Holy shit."

You laugh, spent.

"That's all you've got to say to your... what was it? Your 'little whore'?"

He rasps out a chuckle, too fucked out to even hide the fact that he's blushing profusely- something only you can make him do. Then a nod, continuing to stroke at the baby hairs that rest curled and matted on the back of your neck.

"Those strawberries?" He clears his throat, dismantling the rasp in his voice, "We're doing that again."

You lift your head, just enough to kiss the tip of his nose. "I'll have to remember not to wear white next time."

"Who said you've got to wear anything at all?" He says, shrugging.

You laugh into his chest as you feel him slide out of you, your hand still tracing shapes on his stomach underneath his shirt.

"You are… just…"

For a moment, there's nothing else. You raise your head again, looking up at him to gauge where the sentence is going, your thumb stroking the bridge of his nose that you love so much.

Another moment, and you know he's struggling to find his words, as he always does when he's trying to express his feelings. But the way he's looking at you tells you everything. So, you gently kiss him, non-verbally letting him know he doesn't need to speak. That you've got him.

And as he watches the golden hour sun bathe your skin, he's captivated by you. He really couldn't ask for any more.

[burr-ell]

Genuine question bc i always psyche myself out of writing due to this exact fear, how do we differentiate and avoid Shallow Angst when we pursue writing character studies? Situational angst seems straight forward where it's like oh no character got Hurt and now needs to be Comforted (the "plot" seems out to get this dude hurt and everyone centers on said dude with little other exploration), but say we did want to look at canon grief, using Vex as the example; what is the good way and what is the bad way to explore it? When do we go too far into excluding the rest of the story?

So I had conversations with @blorbologist and @essayofthoughts about this very thing, and what it basically boils down to is this: are you looking at these emotions realistically, taking into consideration the massive spectrum of how these characters interact with them and attempting to push past your own limited perspective of how feelings work, or are you just using them as a vessel to convey how you feel about something or what you think should happen?

Because there are plenty of very good fanworks that involve angst! Angst is, in simple terms, the examination of anxiety, dread, and sadness, and that absolutely has a place in the creation of art. Well-written angst attempts to find the character's voice in it all—it considers how they've dealt with emotions like that in canon, it asks what real-life expressions of grief or sorrow make sense for that character to convey based on their personality and past history, and as all good fanworks (and original works) do, it comes from a desire to understand someone who is not like you.

Take the example of Vex:

How would Vex deal with the loss of Vax? Based on what we know about her, I think it's safe to say that yes, she would be leaning a lot on Percy and Trinket, burying herself in her work some days to avoid the worst of it, but there are also days she'd be avoiding Percy, and maybe even Trinket, to go off on her own. I think she'd hold resentment toward the Raven Queen, even as I think she'd also want to keep the shrine standing in Vax's memory and actively push herself to forgive her. It would be complicated even further by her pregnancy, and all of the hormonal imbalances and physical complications that would entail. It would be complicated even further by the fact that she and Syldor canonically attempt to reconcile specifically in the wake of Vax's death; while I doubt they'd see much of each other in the first year or two, I think they would both be making incredibly awkward and loaded overtures that would be emotionally complicated and draining.

There are times she would lash out and times she would be hollow, and there's a lot she probably wouldn't be able to talk about because she just can't, because grief isn't something you can often put into words. There's a lot she'd also laugh and joke and smile about, because coping with loss means letting the wound scab over. There are times she'd be able to connect to Percy and Keyleth over the loss and times she couldn't, because the loss of a loving-but-complicated family and the loss of a lover don't feel quite the same as the loss of a twin who was all you had for over a decade.

There are a lot of ways to convey all that! There's no "right" answer; this is up for interpretation. But I do think "Vex will never braid her hair again cause Vax used to do that!" is definitely a wrong one.

Vex and Vax were codependent, but I think people tend to overstate the degree, and tend to ignore their canonical relationship development and Vex's characterization. I think it's important to note that Vex actually handles being separated from Vax during the Trial of the Take arc much better than Vax handles it; she makes fast friends with Zahra and generally seems to be enjoying herself and having a good time. Vex closes herself off a lot, but I think an underrated part of her speech at Percy's resurrection is how it recontextualizes the titling in Syngorn—he made her a part of something precious to him, and by the end of the campaign her stated goal is "make Whitestone the tits". Vex didn't just like, wind up as a city figurehead by marriage and shrug and decide to make the best of it; she was offered a chance and made it her bitch. The Raven Queen took part of Vex away when she took Vax, not all of her.

Yes, the loss is incredibly tragic and the end of Campaign 1 is bittersweet, but there are ways to portray Vex dealing with it that don't involve the general tenor of "ALRIGHT EVERYONE, DAILY REMINDER TO BE SAD ABOUT VAX". Like, I don't think Vex's first thought when she saw Laudna's body was "she looks just like Vax :( time for my daily Two Minutes Sad". (My issue with that isn't even whether the thought might occur to her—it absolutely could! But after thirty years, I doubt it would have been anywhere near the same level as "this innocent young woman was horribly killed for looking like me and I have to help her however I can; also if Delilah comes back I can should must and will tear her a new asshole". Like, the Vax thing might have come up long in the aftermath of her and Percy's inevitable late-night alcohol-induced therapy railing, but probably not before.)

A lot of the shallow angst you see in fandom generally has the same voice—not necessarily because it's written by the same people (although you do see many of the same people purveying it), but because the trending popular angst has to trend and be popular somehow, and it does so by channeling thoughts and emotional expressions that are broadly approved and accepted by the community, whatever that community happens to be. The characters in these fanworks behave the way that they do regardless of whether or not it makes sense in the narrative because shallow angst isn't about the narrative—it's about making your audience sad in the specific, narrow way that you are sad. It's about projecting yourself and your own emotions and how you would deal with them onto a character instead of trying to really understand someone who's different from you.

In our discussion, Blorb described fanworks in a way that really resonated with me—they're conversations with canon. Good, effective conversations are real attempts to communicate with people, trying to understand where they're coming from and connecting with who they are. Shallow conversations are one or multiple parties only thinking of the other person as a reflection of themselves, getting out their own thoughts and feelings with little interest in trying to figure out who other people actually are. And it's not that I think people who make these kinds of works are ontologically bad; it's that I think they're stifling their own creativity and growth. Everyone deserves better than to be limited to themselves.

[thequietkid-moonie]

for your recent post

heaven and back, Akira

Befriend a demon desguised as human

[ ONE-SHOT ] [ Akira Fudo ] [ Devilman Crybaby ]

⚠️ This contain a spoilers

› Song that inspired this [ HEAVEN AND BACK - Chase Atlantic ]

Ray I love you!!! I swear since I heard the song the first time i quickly grew obsessed with it, I had being hearing it almost every day!! Thank you thank you thank you 😭😭❤️

I felt like trying to crack a code when I recived your request 🤭, I hope I did it with the correct characters. Hope you love it as much as I did!!

You were pretty popular around the academy, but no wonder since you easily atract the attention to you, you were really handsome and friendly towards everyone, not just that but you were super agile and athletic, surrounded by mystery since in reallity no one knows much about you, about the real you and even when you are pretty popular you are alone amost all the time, just by yourself watching the others go with their day

You had cross paths with Akira before and even when you two had barely talked before you are always friendly with him, always with a smile on your face, what always surprised him, it confuses but amuse him that someone so popular treat him this way, thinking that you may prefer to relate with Miki since she is more popular and kind and yet it always bring a silly smile to his face

You were used to see him with his pretty face and innocent smile around the school, however one day you were surprised with the fact that he came to school being almost a complete diferent person, not just he had changed physicaly but also in his personality, he became more extrovert and confident, doing whatever he wants with a cocky smile on his face, even if you didn't noticed at first it would be imposible to don't know about it since everyone is talking about the change on Akira

Everyone where between the amusment and wondering excitedly what could had happened to him, everyone has their own idea but no one really know what happened to Akira, no one except from you, you know pretty well what happened to him, you already knew about those lately cases of people having and extraordinary change in a short time or all those massacres on clubs, you hoped people would stop getting involved on things they don't understand but it seems like this isn't going to happen

In one of those moments where Akira were being carefree you approached to him without saying anything, when he noticed you and ask you what do you want your only answer was point your finger at him and in a completely calm manner you call him an idiot, Akira immediatly reacted by getting irritated and asking what the hell was your problem, you two never talk and this is the first thing you say to him? It was almost like if he were having a tantrum, you can't help but laugh at his reaction, even when now he has the power of one of the most powerful and dangerous demons that had ever exist Akira is still a teenager human, and that is quite hilarious

You just ignored his irritance and continue with your day, even going away, however that seem to irritated him more and follows you, he had been called a lot of things since his change but an idiot wasn't one of it. From that moment you two start a friendship that just grows more and more as time pass, you didn't admire him nor look up at him for his new strength, but you don't underestimated him neither, something that make him grows competitve with you at first, wanting to show off his strenght to you but it slowly become a special friendship

Akira doesn't know why but he feels like you understand him, like if, somehow, you two were more similar than meets the eye, Akira feels like he can share things with you that he can't share with Miki or Ryo, and sometimes he feels like he doesn't need words, like those times where words aren't enough to express what he want to say you seem to understand anyways and this I something for what he is grateful and completely amuses him

Akira tried to introduce you to Ryo once but it doesn't went well, just by seeing you Ryo knew who you are, and the same went for you, in that moment you wanted to tell Akira that you weren't comfortable and you wanted to leave but Ryo spoke first by saying that you weren't trust worthy, you would just bring problems, Ryo tried to warn Akira to stay away from you but he won't accept that, you were special for him and Ryo should accept it if he didn't want to make trouble with him, at the end Ryo accept it but non of you stop being wary of each other and never come across each other again

Since Akira become the Devilman he start to strugle more with a lot of problems, all this situation is stressing him out, is driving him crazy sometimes and yet he can't talk about this with nobody, the only person he can talk with this is with Ryo but he doesn't care, he just prioritize his research, so everytime Akira feels the need to vent or can't take it anymore he goes to you, he has arrived so many times unexpectedly at your home that it became a common thing but he can't help it, he knows he can count on you and, honestly, he just needs to be with you, he doesn't understand why or how you do it but you always manage to comfort him and he is grateful for it

He had went to you to vent about everything he feels, regrets, fears and even his anger, it had happened so much times that he already had lost the count and not matter how much times he does it you never ask for details, you just hear him, and yet you seem to understand him completely and accept him with all of that. Not just that, but Akira had already lost the count of those times you had come with a silly plan to cheer him up, going out to eat until you burst, having a little race full of cheats between you, dancing out of the blue with the first song you play or just going out on the motorcycle letting the wind take away the worries, he doesn't know how you do it but all those silly ideas make him feel better, but maybe it wasn't the ideas, maybe it was because of you

You stayed by Akira's side, supporting him in good and bad, but when things started to get out of hands and everything quickly become a mess you knew this will explode soon, maybe you didn't knew Ryo's plan complete but you could easily guess, so, with pain in your heart, you leave Akira for a while because you needed to finally get to work, and this isn't something that went unnoticed by him, Akira immediatly noticed your absence but conditions were not the best to go and search for you so he just hoped you were alright

Sadly, non of you get in time to help his friends and family to the cruelty of the anger and scare people did to them, Akira was shattered by all that was happening, crying over his lost when you came to his side once again, you called his name and he immediatly turned around when he reconized your voice, but this was the first time for both to seeing each other on this form, this was the first time he met your demon form and this was the first time you saw the devilman in person, he was confused but his relief was bigger and he just went to hug you, still crying

When he calm down, at least enough, you apologized to him for leaving him alone and explained to him that you were just getting yourself ready for what is going to happen, introducing to him all the demons that now are following you, ready to fight by his side against Satan before explaining what Satan was doing, and, now, you finally were able to explain yourself too, you were a demon living in this earth since so long ago, but unlike other demons you grow curious over humans, and instead of wanting to end with them you wanted to see more of humankind, and now it was time to defend the humans you loved so much

Satan themselfs reveal their plan and their true form, everything was too much for Akira but you quickly take his hand to comfort him, like you had always did, and with a smile you encourage him to fight, promising to fight by his side until the end

[funnywormz]

Did we ever get that rimmer gender analysis you promised us 🥺🥺🥺 if we did I missed it and I'm so sad and crying

I'M SO SORRY IT TOOK ME LIKE A WEEK TO ANSWER THIS ANON.......i can't quite remember, i think i may have done a small post abt it but it wasn't as detailed as i wanted??? sorry my memory for most stuff is pretty awful rip........

since i'm thinking abt it again now i will put a little rimmer gender ramble under the cut!! it's kinda repeating stuff that i've said in other posts but it's how i feel abt him and his identity, i hope you like it!!!! apologies if it doesn't make sense my brain has been full of sludge lately

OK SO. i think that masculinity has always been a very important part of rimmer's life, but a very toxic form of it. it's clear that his parents prioritised his brothers over him partly because they embodied more traditionally masculine traits, like confidence and physical strength. growing up, rimmer got the message from his parents that to be masculine was to be admired and loved. his parents abused him, and his brothers bullied him, and i think that although rimmer resents them for it he also sees it as being his fault?

i think it's because of this pressure he felt to be gender conforming growing up, that he feels he needs to force himself into some kind of macho man role. he fails at it miserably, and it's obviously not his true self, but he tries to keep it up because at his root, rimmer really does just want to be loved. growing up his parents showed him that their love was conditional, and he assumes everyone else is that way too, so he tries to shape himself into someone he thinks is lovable. unfortunately it only leads to unhappiness for everyone involved bc he's obviously putting up a front but he resents anyone who tries to pry it away.

rimmer's attempts at masculinity are clearly ridiculous, to the point where the show makes fun of him for it too. he's a coward, he's very petty and picky, the show takes every opportunity it can to have him crossdress, and it's sort of a running joke that lister's dick is bigger than his. to anyone around him, it's pretty clear that rimmer is often trying to pretend that he's someone he's not, and the show makes it a comedic thing a lot of the time.

rimmer doesn't know it's obvious, though. he's certainly not good at reading or understanding other people (i also heavily hc him as autistic but that's a post for another day), and i think a lot of the time he assumes he's successfully fooling everyone when he isn't. rimmer also has a longstanding habit of lying and then doubling down when he gets caught in the lie, even if it involves him doing something he finds unpleasant. i think his gender is one of those cases. his attempts at masculinity are "lies", but when that's pointed out to him he refuses to admit it even when it's clear he's putting up a front. admitting that he's not masculine would be, in his mind, admitting that he isn't worth his parents' (or anyone else's) love, and he can't stand that thought.

it's pretty telling, though, that whenever rimmer's inhibitions are removed or part of his hidden inner self is revealed, it's often feminine. when rimmer was infected with the holovirus, it seems like practically the first thing he did was put a dress on. wearing gingham dresses is NOT a universal holovirus thing. dr langstrom definitely wasn't wearing one. that's a RIMMER thing.

when the crew meet the "low" versions of themselves in demons and angels, while all of the other characters get relatively generic "evil" versions of themselves, low rimmer is basically wearing sexy lingerie with a dominatrix look and openly flirts with lister. considering that the lows are all meant to express the parts of the characters that they hate or view as the worst parts of themselves, i think it's a very direct (albeit unintentional?) way of showing rimmer's internalised homophobia and transphobia towards himself.

it's ALSO telling that rimmer specifically accuses ace of doing both gay and feminine things, like "wearing women's underwear" and "whipping the house boy". after all, ace IS rimmer. rimmer resents ace for being a better version of himself, and the most cutting insults he can think of for HIMSELF are insinuating that ace is gnc. stinks of projection to me. i think kryten agreed too, in dimension jump he almost seems to point out that rimmer is projecting before he's interrupted.

for most of the series, rimmer is, to me, someone who is miserable abt being potentially queer and is attempting to suppress it. however, the promised land changes this.

in the promised land, rimmer initially resents his status as a hologram, but by the end of the movie he wears it as a badge of pride. likewise, his hero-sona the "mighty light" is kinda campy, he's wearing sparkly tight fitting clothes with expertly styled hair and all. you could definitely read the promised land's rimmer arc as a metaphor for him accepting himself for being queer, but i would argue there's a self acceptance there that goes deeper. perhaps he's finally accepted that he can be admired AND be more feminine. it's not a big step forward but it's SOMETHING.

rimmer's identity as a hologram is also something tpl reckons with. rimmer fully grapples with realising that his "true" self is dead, that he isn't "real". i think that gender could be a part of it. the movie doesn't touch on it at ALL, to be clear, but as rimmer learns to be confident in who he is now and embrace his status as a hologram, i can't help but feel that his connection to strict gender roles must have also lessened. after all, gender and sex are very human concepts, and he isn't human anymore. being a hologram, he could change his body and voice any time he wanted (or at least any time holly felt like being nice lol). him being a man seems sorta irrelevant in that context. he's out in the middle of space with the last human being left alive. i don't think that a strong sense of gender identity could even really be possible for him when he's so isolated from the world that invented those things, and when he has the ability to play around with it so easily.

this last part is definitely projection, but i just feel like being a hologram has gotta eventually lead to a more nonbinary identity. so much of what we consider sex and gender to be is tied up in our perceptions and interactions and what we feel is expected of us. rimmer doesn't have that anymore. human society is gone, he isn't even human himself........ his parents are dead, too. why should he keep on playing this charade with himself that he doesn't even believe in?

i'm not necessarily sure that canon rimmer would have the self reflection abilities to realise any of this stuff, but in my mind he becomes more comfortable with being nonbinary and queer after tpl. it feels like a natural progression from accepting his status as a hologram to accepting the other parts of himself he used to hate, y’know?

ANYWAYS, i think that's all i can really say on the topic at the moment. this post isn't really an analysis, more of a word vomit about my personal headcanons and things i've noticed. still, i hope you enjoyed reading it and knowing my thoughts about the Rimmer Gender Situation lol. if anyone wants to add anything feel free, but please be nice

[dotster001]

I saw your event (two days before it ended, man am I lucky) and wanted to ask for a Twisted Wonderland matchup

To put ut plainly. Im an asshole

Low empathy and lack of need to give a shit about anything. I'm very cynical and view the world as this place where nothing good comes without a cost.

When something good happens I'm quick to find a fault with it and I'm a lazy person. I have goals but I couldn't give enough of a damn to try and accomplish them.

When I'm angry and will go for insecurities, I'll make it hurt which I admit is a very toxic trait that I'm working on fixing, it's slowly getting there but still quite which is why I added it.

And that's all i can think of right now...OH WAIT im a dark humor type of person, sexual humor as well, i tend to see innuendos in a lit offf things, and that's abt all I can think of...

Thank you and congrats on the milestone ♥️

Event Closed

(glad you were able to hit the event, cause I had fun with this one 😂 honorable mentions to Jamil and Ruggie, but...)

I match you with Floyd Leech.

Low empathy and lack of need to give a shit? Welcome to the Leech family, you'll fit right in. I thought about you with Jade, but realized you were too alike. Meanwhile, Floyd is used to his cynical brother, but brings some fun to life. If you're settled in a cynical point about something, Floyd can take that viewpoint, and smash it to smithereens as he does a chaotic break dance. Or he'll back you up on your viewpoint, with the most stoic expression on his face. Pick your poison.

Too tired to accomplish your goals? Fine with Floyd, he just wants to cuddle anyways. But if you want him to push you, he will. He goes with the flow. You don't even need to tell him what you want, cause when it comes to those he cares about he is incredibly insightful. (On a side note, if he is feeling lazy today, don't you fucking dare push him. I can't say for sure what he'll do, but it'll probably involve you being stuck somewhere with him for hours until someone can come save you.)

Go for his insecurities. It makes him laugh. Not in a, he looks down on you way, but in an, aw, look how well shrimpy knows me way. He won't do it back unless you want him to. But he sees it as a love language. Look at you! You see me! Not as half of a pair, but as me! (What a weird little freak)

Look, I'm super  ace so idk how to sexual joke, but I know for sure Floyd does. He might give you a run for your money. If you want to get him to laugh really loud, drop a good out of nowhere, and he'll be dying. Yes, he has gotten kicked out of class for laughing too loudly at a sexual joke you made. But he'll do it back to you, regardless of the consequences, so be on your guard. 

Again, he has perfected the art of the dark joke. Some people can't tell if he's kidding, or if he's really killed people. But if you can keep up with him, he's enamored. Head over heels. Bewitched. Hopefully, you don't have a "that's too far" joke, cause he has millions to drop on you. 

The time had come. The part of the relationship everyone fears had arrived. Meeting the parents.

Floyd, as usual, was no help in preparing you for the encounter.

"What are they like?"

"Sometimes they're boring, sometimes they're not."

"I've never even met land Mafia, how do you act around mafia from the ocean?"

"I dunno."

"What if they don't like me?"

"They don't like a lot of people."

Useless. All of the "information" he gave you was useless. But now that you were seconds away from the arranged get together, he seemed more readily available to help.

"How should I act around them?"

"Honestly, Shrimpy, just be yourself," Floyd said with a soft smile.

"That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard," you scowled.

"Nah, for real. I'm gonna be running their empire one day, and they wanna make sure the person by my side is a bad ass and tough as stone. They're probably gonna be mean to you on purpose, at first, to see if you can handle it. But I know you can, cause my shrimpy bites, and bites hard."

"Only when you beg," you smirked, causing Floyd to giggle.

"See? Nothing to worry about. Plus, if everything goes wrong," he took both your hands in his, and gave a lovesick smile, "we can always just kill them."

"Aw, I love you so much baby."

"Love you too, shrimpy."

[struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor]

Impatient anon again 👋🏻

I'm always excited to see you posting asks it helps me to ease my mind and do a reality check. Since the release of "Seven" I felt kinda guilty and isolated for my reaction to it (mostly because of lyrics/rap part) in the ocean of adoration and praise about JK's choices in chapter 2 from everyone else. Then I stumbled across your post and it was exactly what I was feeling/thinking at that time. I instantly felt "I'm not the only one!!" I'm not crazy!!" So thank you for that 😊

And I like to listen to your thoughts because I personally don't see it as pessimistic or dramatic, just raw. You don't sugarcoat things and I'm all in for that. To me it sounds quite rational even if it come across as rude or harsh to others. I guess I have the same style of expressing myself: emotions + explanations 😂 I am an emotional person but I always use critical thinking and somehow tend to "roast" the people I love the most (because of emotional involvement and instant reactions).

I love and admire his personality. He is my favourite versatile singer. His voice...is truly healing. But now I can't feel the magic. I'm just an observer who is trying to trust his choices (even if it's questionable sometimes but what do I know about the industry he is working in?). I don't know what to connect to anymore (his lack of artistry/creativity) and that what makes me sad the most. No excitement, more like anxiety for the new releases 😂 I just miss my man talking to bugs and fish and kissing his dog endlessly on his cozy lives ❤️‍🔥 But he chose to release p*rn songs (ah, sorry, matuuuure and honest) and be more "sharp and powerful". Ok 🙃 (btw I'm not against it just wanted him to write the lyrics himself, make it sensual and kill the whole fandom with it. Imo he could make it tastier not that provocative/edgy/american~ish to show his "mature" side). Or maybe it's just me.

I absolutely adore his softness (it's rare in men and I don't necessarily think that's all he has as for his character), I just wish he could accept this side of him without trying to look a particular way in the eyes of the public. But realistically thinking with his position in life this must be the hardest thing for him to do. Not to overthink. Can't even imagine the pressure and craziness of his life. I want an excursion to his brain to finally understand him without drowning in my own assumptions about him (or others). He is always saying something without further proper explanation in the interviews and...I just can't with him 😅

And what's for the teaser...I liked the quality (great director), the vibe and even the song. Sounds better than seven judging by the tiny snippet but the lyrics... I'm expecting the worst 😁 Something is telling me it won't pass the misogyny examination of Namjoon's female professor he is always consulting with on this topic. Let's see what will happen tomorrow 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

*sorry for any mistakes and over explaining, English is not my native language (but I tried 😅).

Hi impatient anon! Thank you so much for the warm reassurances!!! I'm very happy you can relate to me. I can relate to you as well. I post stuff not only to get if off my chest and process my feelings, but also in hopes that anons like you will reach out and I can feel understood! I understand the way your mind works and the over explaining part haha. I'm the same. I have reservations about Jungkook's songs, and dread them more than anticipate them as well, which kinda sucks haha. I think we're going to get generic lyrics, overtly sexual on Jack Harlow's side, subtle on Jungkook's, with Jungkook walking around holding a bat (he's so baby face, how is he supposed to look tough? and that's such a cliché anyway), and the trailer seemed nice, but who knows what will come of the MV! Fingers crossed though!

Thanks for the ask! I'll see you on the other side! Make sure to over explain your thoughts on the MV later! My ask box is always open!!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I recently saw a video by youtuber grady smith and looking at the channel, looks like he talks a lot about country music. do u think you'd be interested in something like that? i watched a few videos and i like what hes saying about the songs

Part 2: i watched grady smiths video on how hardy cracked the bro country code and i agree i dont listen to a ton of country but i really enjoy hardys music and its makin me want to listen to more, i particularly love all she left was me, i think grady said instrumental is a bit too much for him but im def listenin for the lyrics not the instrumental haha, could i hear some thoughts from u on hardy/country music in general

(Based on this post, for anyone who wants context, but it just said I used to read a lot of country music blogs.)

Looking up Grady briefly, he seems like an interesting guy. To be honest I haven't kept up with the country music blogs since around 2015, I'd sort of found a lot of the artists I really liked, and could follow as they put out new music so didn't feel as much need to find more online. But I probably should look at it again, because I'm sure I'm missing lots of good new artists.

I have to admit I have an instinctive, unfair dislike of the whole "YouTuber" thing, of social media generally (which I am hypocritically writing on social media, but I like that Tumblr is not the sort of social media where anyone tells you to "like and subscribe", you know?), and from trying a few minutes of his videos just now I had to repeatedly remind myself to not immediately be a judgmental dick about that. There are probably lots of good reasons why it's bad to dislike that stuff, because it's letting anyone put themselves out there instead of having media be the sole property of people who've been deemed good enough by television networks or other publishers, and that's an improvement generally. That's my view on the political and sociological issue, but then I look at someone talking into a camera about their sponsor and my judgmental brain immediately kicks in and objects. Also hypocritically, this does not happen when audio-only podcasts talk about their sponsors, even though that's the same thing.

Anyway though, this guy seems cool. I may see if I can get over my inherently judgmental nature and watch some of his videos, because I probably am missing out on music that I'd like just due to not following that stuff anymore.

I don't know the singer Hardy, I just listened to the All She Left Was Me song and I must admit it's not really my thing, but it's not bad. As in, I think it's not quite to my taste but I don't think it's terrible music. I definitely see what you mean about it being bro country, but a type of bro country that doesn't immediately make me want to punch everyone involved in making it, so that's impressive.

To be honest I'm sure I'm betraying my ignorance here, in that I was sort of on top of whatever was big in the alternative country/Americana blogs from 2006-ish to 2015-ish, and have a decent-ish knowledge of Highwaymen-era country (that I didn't need music blogs for, that came from my parents when I was young) but can't claim to be all that informed about the genre, especially currently. I know good country music makes me feel like my heart is breaking in every part of my body and in all the best ways, and in 2012 I used to get really really mad when people applied that term to pop music sung by empty cowboy hats. These days I'm less mad, but that's probably only because I pay less attention and am almost never in a place where I have to hear songs from a radio anymore.

Here, these are some of my favourite songs by artists that I discovered from country music blogs years ago:

And here's a song by my favourite country singer, Kris Kristofferson, whom I was into before I found the blogs, but this song does summarize the general attitude expressed in those blogs quite well:

...So those are some of my thoughts. I was a lot more annoying about them in 2012. If anyone reading this finds me annoying now, just know I used to be far worse.

Thanks for the message! I always appreciate people sending me things out of nowhere telling me they want to know about my music taste, though I unfortunately don't know much about the specific stuff you brought up.

[magicsunwheel]

Why You're F#cking Amazing

Pick-a-Card

How to play: pick one of the photos below using your intuition. You can close your eyes and meditate for a bit or just take a few grounding breaths while thinking of the topic. Feeling drawn to more than one is fine! You might have messages in more than one pile

Pile 1 (x) Pile 2 (x) Pile 3 (x)

My pile numbers always go from left to right, then down to the text row (if applicable)

Pile 1

Cards: The High Priestess, Five of Swords, Seven of Pentacles, The Moon Rx, Five of Rods, Ace of Pentacles

You are so intuitive! You're either very in touch with your divine feminine or are working your way there right now. Something about you is severe in the most beautiful way. You can take things seriously when they need to and the way you command a room with just your presence is unmatched. Maybe you're also a tarot reader or involved in spirituality/divination in some way. Maybe you really like Pick-a-Cards.

Something beautiful about you is that you never give up on a fight, especially when you know the end is worth it. Your ambition is strong and you will fight for what you love and what you want. You are not weak-willed by any means.

This also makes you so unique! You work so hard and put so much labor into your love even if you know it will take a long time to come to fruition. The times that you feel discouraged by a lack of results are few and far between. If for some reason you do find yourself wistfully hoping for faster results or an easier path, you can easily remind yourself of why you started in the first place.

You might have moments where you think of yourself as sneaky or like you're hiding a part of yourself from others, like your true self would be too much for them. I'm here to tell you that your intensity is exactly what make you such a beautiful person! You thrive in competition and in adversity. It gives you a chance to show off your quick thinking and survival skills. Others look at you with envy of how you can make an opportunity out of seemingly nothing!

If you need help improving your self-love, Spirit says to stop comparing yourself to others! You are amazing and beautiful and unique all on your own! Throwing yourself into the fray to compete against others who are nothing like you will only fim your inner shine. And you really do shine! When I asked for a card about why you are beautiful, nearly half the damn deck flew out!

Sprit loves you and I love you so please take care of yourself and keep making those amazing opportunities to improve your physical surroundings. (I feel like you have a very clean room/home)

Pile 2

Cards: Nine of Rods, the World, King of Cups, Three of Rods, Ace of Rods, Two of Cups

Ahh the Loona pile!

Similar to Pile 1, but much more fiery! You are resilient! Taking time to collect yourself before pushing forward with a renewed sense of energy and purpose is such an amazing and useful trait. You maybe aren't as commanding of a presence but you have such an inner strength that no one can deny.

You got the World for the reason why you're beautiful! Maybe it's related to physically being very beautiful and possibly exotic-looking. You might have very specific features associated with a certain area of the world that stand out where you live. You also have such a wonderful understanding of the world and where it's currently at. Things can seem negative or like hope is lost but you still seek out the beauty and share it with others. You see opportunity where others do not and feel a sense of peace and connectedness with all of humanity. Wow!

Your uniqueness shines in your emotionality and compassion. You might be a natural born leader who makes sure to understand all under your rule. You lead with kindness and, most importantly, by example. You don't have any desire to use you position for ill-gotten gains. Power to you does not corrupt, it solely provides a tool for you to do good in the world and really make a difference in the lives of others, whether it's on a large or small scale. You are probably the kind of person who makes sure to give money to those who need it when you pass a begging mother and her children, or buying a homeless man a bottle of water on a hot day.

Your card for why you think you are not perfect actually came out quite positive. Maybe you don't have a very low self esteem, but I can see a few possible scenarios here. You might be constantly planning in your head, waiting and watching for the next move to take but never actually getting to the action part. Maybe you're planning for your future and have so much planned out that you're excited for, but haven't made the practical plans on how to actually get there. This could make you feel bad about yourself especially on days where you're reminded of others moving ahead in their lives while you're still planning. Visualisation is very important in manifesting your desired reality! If you are moving slower than others around you, remember that it is okay to not be where "everyone else" is. Life is not a race or a competition. Taking your time to get to where you need to be when you need to be there reminds me of the story of the tortoise and the hare. Quick does not necessarily mean better.

You can improve your self-love by creating! Using your creativity and passion to make something! Create art, whether it's physical/digital art, music, writing, inventing, anything that uses those creative muscles of yours. It doesn't have to be good! Just creating something will help burn up that excess energy you have that's trying to rush you somewhere. Self-expression this way can be a wonderful hobby even if you don't consider yourself as a creative person.

Your kindness really shines through. You care so deeply about the people around you and your spiritual team cares just as deeply about you. You are loved and watched over and protected by Spirit. Others around you also see your sparkle and appreciate and admire you, even if they don't show it. Know you are beautiful and amazing and bringing a light into this world that needs to be here.

Pile 3

Cards: Six of Rods, the Hierophant, Four of Rods, Six of Cups, Ten of Swords, the Hermit Rx

Damn, who are y'all!? You've got some mighty power and pull in this world. Maybe you're a public figure or have some kind of platform, like a social media with many followers. You could also be well-recognized within your field of study/work. Whoever you are, people see you and look up to you. They celebrate you and how amazing you are! Spirit loves this about you and you really shine in the spotlight. Your achievements deserve all this pomp and celebration!

You are naturally authoritative. People listen when you speak and take your words to heart. You might also be a religious person or someone who enjoys organization and the comfort of hierarchy. People will willingly follow you wherever you lead them because they trust you with all their hearts. "A merciful ruler" (lol) You hold your position with grace and dignity befitting a king or queen.

You are unique in ways the public recognizes, but we knew that already! You might be someone who likes to entertain and you throw the greatest parties and get-togethers. Maybe you've planned a wedding and everyone had such an amazing time! You know how to relax and have fun when the time for celebrating arrives. You can out down your guard and bit and let loose. Not many people with such responsibility can let go of the reigns like that, but you don't seem to hold on to control too tightly.

Your past might be a source of anxiety for you. Maybe you're worried that what you've done when you were younger will catch up to you and ruin what you've got going on now, but it's important to remember that the past is the past. It cannot be undone or wished away. Taking time to accept what happened and recognizing that you've moved on to bigger and better things is important here. Whatever happened, take time to heal your childhood wounds and forgive past actions.

Ending this cycle will bring much more self-love to your life. Old habits and patterns being out to rest is the way forward. It might be a painful ending and something you don't necessarily look forward to, but it is something that needs to happen to clear out old energy and welcome in everything new. You can't expect to move on if you're still repeating old actions or ways of thinking. It's time to set these things to rest and evolve. Leave behind what no longer serves you.

Your understanding of yourself knows no bounds. You've taken the time to inquisit yourself and learn all of the shadows that lie there. Self-reflection might be a favored pastime for you. Through this knowledge of yourself you are able to see truths that many struggle to see all their lives. Your light can cut through the fog if bullshit and see the true source of something. Use this knowledge of yourself to become the best version of yourself that you can be! I know you're already on your way there and it's amazing to see! Spirit is so proud of you and loves you so much!

[inhuman-obey-me]

On Simeon and what it means to be an angel

The beautiful, gentle angel who can smile through just about anything. But what's underneath the ever-present smile of his? Is he really just pure, sweet, and kind?

Not at all. Simeon can be very mischievous at some times, and scarily wrathful at others. Some of you may be thinking, just what kind of angel is someone like that? Well, let's talk about that.

(includes spoilers up to lesson 52)

Starting with the idea of what angels are supposed to be like - the common, pop-culture characterization of angels is that they are pure, merciful, peaceful beings who can only do good and are horrified by anything dark or bad.

And admittedly, Simeon doesn't seem to quite perfectly fit that mold.

[Disclaimer: Neither mod of this blog belong to the Abrahamic religions, so this is purely from our own research]

In terms of how angels have been described in various scriptures, however, this isn't actually what they are like. Angels act on behalf of God, and are usually not meant to have any free will of their own. The thing that separates angels from demons is not a tendency towards kindness and purity, but that their actions are aligned with God's desires rather than their own. What this means in effect is that, both in actual scripture and in the game, angels can and will do things that are a lot less pure and peaceful than their modern mainstream depictions would suggest.

For example, there is a part of the Bible (at least in various versions) where it is mentioned that an angel was ordered by God to kill one hundred eighty-five Assyrians, leaving their camp full of dead bodies in the morning.

The poet Rainer Maria Rilke states in his The Duino Elegies - "Every Angel is terror".

Seraphim - which is what OM!'s renditions of Simeon and Lucifer both formerly were - are basically six-winged snakes. Cherubim, as OM!'s Beelzebub formerly was, are actually multi-faced humanoid-lions with wings. "Do not be afraid," is a line angels often say when they meet humans because they are just as scary-looking as demons - just they're, you know, the "good" ones.

Actual descriptions of angels aside, even in-game, we are presented with example after example that angels are not perfect "pure and good" beings either. The game itself emphasizes this point at various times - if you upset Simeon during Surprise Guest interactions, one of his displeased lines is: "Just because I'm an angel doesn't mean I'm all forgiving." In lesson 51, though he initially says he left Satan to be with the Angel versions of his brothers for Satan's benefit, if MC actually agrees that he was just being kind, he is surprised that they really believed him.

It's not just him, either. Similar to Simeon's upset reaction, if you give Luke a present he doesn't like, he says, "I know I'm an all-forgiving angel and everything, but even so, this is a little too much..." When MC briefly lands in the past, the brothers actually describe Simeon as the least intense of the seraphim. Back when the brothers were angels, Lucifer was still known for being strict and arrogant. On the more extreme end, Raphael was known for keeping the angels in line via the pointy end of his spear, as Asmodeus fears will happen to him as punishment for going to a party. And Michael himself, the top-ranking leader, who one might think should be the most angelic of angels, is described as a sadist. In the Angelic Demons event, Michael even gets Simeon to give the demon brothers cursed bracelets that temporarily turn them into angels. It's not a very nice prank to pull on them, as it makes the brothers miserable to be converted back to their old forms, not to mention that the curse goes so far that they are turned into the caricature of overly nice and polite angels - but as it could be considered more in line with pulling them towards "God's will," this would actually be considered a good angel thing to do.

As the game points out, being the least intense doesn't exactly make Simeon easygoing, either. In fact, we have seen at this point quite a few examples of Simeon's rage. As a play director, he berates the brothers so much over any mistakes that they call him a dictator. Not to mention, the reason they are in the play in the first place is because the entire previous cast quit because they couldn't deal with him.

Later, when he and Luke are running the Angel's Halo, he drags the brothers into helping out. Though he is shown still smiling, everyone agrees because they are terrified of his menacing aura. Even Diavolo, when on the home screen, remarks about hiding because he made Lucifer mad again, but it's Simeon who he calls "the one person in this world I don't want to anger."

On a much lighter note, some of his less "angelic" behavior also comes from his playful, mischievous side. As referenced earlier, he is surprised if MC believes he was just being nice, but if the player says they thought he was pranking Satan, it gives intimacy points with him, and he says:

He also joins in on the teasing of Luke, having his name as "Luke (Chihuahua)" in his D.D.D. contacts. Multiple of his home screen lines also show how much he loves messing with Luke in general:

"I'm free right now, so I think I might go and tease Luke."

"Luke is like a Chihuahua who thinks it is a German Shepherd. Cute, huh?"

"I'm back! I was so excited to meet you that I left Luke behind."

"If you don't eat enough breakfast, you'll turn out tiny like Luke."

Plus, in dance battles, one of his chibi poses is him teasingly scaring someone, while Luke has a corresponding scared pose, suggesting that he may be meant to be scaring Luke in particular.

He also gets MC to mess with Belphegor when they are looking for him, instructing them to kick the tree that he knows he's probably asleep in as hard as they possibly can.

However, while none of those things make him any less of an angel, there is evidence to support that he is, in fact, a "bad" angel in a different sense.

As the two Celestial Realm exchange students, Simeon and Luke represent two opposite ends of a spectrum of angel attitudes. Luke, having still been very young when the Great Celestial War happened, has been taught to have very uptight views of the demons, insisting that they are evil and should be avoided at all costs. When he first arrives in the Devildom, he is terrified at the idea that the two of them could get corrupted by the demons and fall. This is the prevailing attitude taught in the Celestial Realm: that demons are wicked, and that angels are inherently better than them.

By contrast, Simeon does not hold this view at all. He is happy to spend time with the demon brothers, and doesn't look down on them for falling. On the home screen, Luke complains, "Simeon is too sweet to demons! He's sweeter than a cake from Madam Scream's!" In the Rain, a Fire and Simeon Devilgram story, Simeon even talks about how he actually prefers the hustle and bustle of the Devildom, feeling that the Celestial Realm feels too quiet now.

This difference between him and Luke is not only expressed in his fondness for the demons, either. Simeon understands the nuances of good vs evil, and he himself seems to operate in shades of grey at times, rather than being perfectly aligned with Michael's (and by extension, it's implied, God's) wishes. More than once, he displays quite a flippant attitude towards following the rules, such as his very hand-wavey dismissal when MC asks about his lying.

Luke also calls him out on his disregard for rules, saying that Simeon is just too loose about following them:

However, this glib attitude should not be taken to mean that Simeon doesn't know exactly what he's doing. When it seems the only solution to restore stability to the three realms is for MC to sever all their pacts with the demon brothers, he quickly realizes that the other option, the Ring of Light that used to belong to Lucifer, must be hidden among Michael's things rather than lost to time as everyone thought. He tells Luke that he needs to go back to the Celestial Realm to take care of something, but he is firm that Luke should not come with him - because he is going to steal the ring from Michael, a risky, rebellious move that he doesn't want Luke to get involved in. He is perfectly aware of what he's doing, and actively chooses to do it anyway, consequences be damned, because he wants to do what he feels is right.

When Michael does confront him about it, he's not the least bit sorry, either. In fact, he sasses him and talks back, unafraid to show disrespect to God's top angel.

We also know that he's been demoted at some point. Luke tells MC that Simeon is an archangel, making him one of the Celestial Realm's warriors, or as Simeon himself has jokingly described it, a "low-level grunt" who is overworked by higher-up angels like Michael. However, during MC's time travel back to the Celestial Realm, we learn that Simeon used to be a seraph right alongside Michael and Lucifer. It is again referenced during the fairy incident, when he makes the low-level grunt joke again but is then reminded that he was a seraph at this point in time. We're not sure yet why he was demoted - there's a lot of speculation on this point, and we can't draw any definitive conclusions yet - but if we take that being a "good" angel means being obedient to Michael and God, we start to get a far less rosy picture of Simeon's good standing as an angel.

What does this mean? Is he a "bad" angel? Kind of, but not for the reasons some may think. His mischievous, devious, and playful side is not what makes him less angelic. It is his more rebellious, nonconformist way of doing things that actually opens up the possibility of him gradually getting further and further away from being an ideal angel, and potentially putting him on the path of falling from grace.

[husbandohunter]

Moments of Despair #2 [Genshin Impact/Albedo x Reader]

Synopsis: "The alchemist who relished in his gifts only to fall from grace."

(A series of works where the boys deal with the passing of their beloved).

Diluc’s despair

Warnings: angst, tragedy, major character death and psychological horror (correct me if otherwise)

(A/n): I decided to take a slightly different approach this time. Regardless, it’s still killing my heart TwT.

---------------------------------------------------

Out of the many wonders of Teyvat, one thing Albedo loved most was how you were so different from him. 

Difference ties to the unknown, one that must be discovered. He was drawn to you the first time he had laid his eyes upon your form standing at the heights of Mondstadt's cathedral. The Sisters scolded you from below, but all you did was reply with a wink amidst their chaos before soaring into the skies and letting the wind carry your glider. Reckless they said. For him, your recklessness was intriguing. 

As the sun's light blinded his vision, everything he saw seemed like a glass barrier. For the ground was where he thrived and chalk was his core, it became the basis of Albedo's very existence. Even the geo Archon granted him a Vision of the same element to affirm his identity. The earth will forever be attached to his feet as he will keep on his stride until every last truth of Teyvat have all been realized. You, on the other hand, hailed from a place where he couldn't quite reach. What lies beyond this glass ceiling? Albedo found himself gradually holding onto a string of curiosities, a string he could touch but was not able to feel. 

'Interesting,' he thought quietly, while the breeze slip between the fingers of his outstretched hand. 

He was a character of logic, possessing sharp eyes that could pierce through the depths of the most complex formulas and a mind to predict their outcomes-  as long as alchemy was still related. All impossibilities thrown in his way only paved a path for him to become the well known genius he was now. Whether it was alchemy or  investigations with the Knights of Favonius, Albedo never failed to deliver the answers. But despite it all, he always found himself endlessly contemplating over things that were considered intangible. He wonders why you smile when there was nothing to laugh about. How could you tell between the complexities of the human heart? Albedo can't seem to put a finger on it. 

'Why? What drives you? What are you thinking?' 

The Chief Alchemist couldn't resist being fascinated by your unpredictability. It reels him in similar to a fish being baited out of the waters. However, unlike those creatures, Albedo only tightened his grip on the strings as if they were a lifeline, determined to find out what they truly felt like to the touch. 

"I can't really say it's much of an answer," you hummed, clasping both hands behind your back before declaring with a grin, "To put it simply, you just gotta follow your heart."

'Follow your heart...' What does it mean to follow your heart? 

"I'm afraid I still don't understand," he replied in a thoughtful manner. The statement never really resonated with him and it certainly weren't the words his Master taught when he was in the early stages of being created, "But it does suit you very much." 

"Really? But still bring your head with you," a playful laugh escapes and you add while pointing a finger, "At least, it's what everyone tells me these days." 

"Hm," Albedo then affirms with a nod, "I can definitely see why they would tell you that." 

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?" 

The days go by and his repetitious march towards the truth remains the same. However, there was never a dull moment when you were at his side. Perhaps that was the reason why Albedo became so attracted to your aura. The way you'd follow around his experiments, eyes so full of enthusiasm at every step of the activity. Sometimes the events can get a little too out of hand in which he needs to step in and save you from getting stuck in slime condensates...constantly. Albedo grew fond of your childlike excitement even when you weren't entirely sure what was going on. He normally distanced himself from socializing as it never sparked his interest. Frankly, he was too much of a genius for mundane conversations. Your presence was rather refreshing in this case. You were an oddball, just like him, and for once the alchemist felt like he didn't need to place that glass barrier between the two worlds. 

"You seem to be in a very good mood today Mister Albedo." 

He was a man of subtle expressions yet anyone could notice the small gleam in his eyes whenever he saw you walking in the hallway. Sucrose often remarked with a giggle after she noticed her teacher holding his documents upside down. But who could blame him? Joy, fun, laughter. He was able to experience those emotions all because of you; his beloved. You were the colour to his canvas and the meaning to his flower. You were a force of nature. Like a warm breeze gracing upon the terrestrial lands, you move him. 

Thump- thump- thump- 

Strings around his world began to weave one whole picture while they also tugged inside his chest. God had finally blown the breath of life into mankind's body, it was only a matter of time before Albedo came to follow his heart too. 

-------- 

"Alright, just one more detail aaaaand done!" 

You gave a small tap using the tip of your pencil and leaned back to examine your artwork. 

Masterpiece! 

On days when Katheryne had no commissions assigned to the guild, Albedo would accompany you to the Whispering Woods and conduct his sketches there instead. He was aware of the discomfort Dragonspine brought as the temperature wasn't ideal for anyone except for him. You eventually learned that your lover was not only intelligently different from the rest but physically too. Albedo, aside from the Cavalry Captain, was mysterious in his own way. He was hard to read yet never came off as intimidating, no one knew of his origins nor they knew how he came to Mondstadt. You wondered why someone like him would have wanted to get involved with your shenanigans. Rosaria often gave warnings regarding the alchemist's 'hidden intentions' in which you'd roll your eyes in response. The Albedo you knew was far from that. He was a big brother to Klee, a man passionate about his work, he was the one golden star among the many silvers in your sky. He was your lover. 

My Albedo. 

Brushing a hand upon the drawing you made of him, you glided down the lines of his cheek before resting your finger on the mark by his neck. You gazed at it with fondness. Truly a masterpiece indeed. 

"You do realize I'm still here?" 

The paper nearly flies out of your grasp and you snatched it back to your chest, "HUH A-ALBEDO, WHEN DID YOU APPEAR???" 

"I was with you the whole time," he states. The corner of his lip tug upward ever so slightly, "You said you wanted to sketch me." 

"A-Ahahaha, so I did," you reply while scratching your head bashfully. 'I thought I was looking at a sculpture!!'  You rushed to cover your face with the sheet. It wasn't that you forgot he was there, rather, you forgot he was still a living and breathing specimen who just witnessed your little serenade. As Lisa had once said, Albedo was easy on the eyes. His graceful features made him seem almost like an oil painting that could only be found in  halls of the most prestigious households. You made sure to capture everything, every detail, every curve just like he had done with your portraits. Only now you noticed the sun already began its descent below the lakeside, dusting the landscape with hints of bright orange as it marked the day's end. If only time could slow down. But duty calls upon your next journey and there was no telling when you'd return. At the very least, a simple portrait would suffice to fill in the temporary gap of his absence. 

"Can I see it?" 

You glanced his direction while keeping the drawing close to your nose, "Are you sure about that? It might not be up to your expectations." 

"I'm sure," Albedo affirms with a straight countenance, "I can already tell you've put a great amount of effort, otherwise you wouldn't have taken this long." 

"Yeeaahh I kinda lost track of time. I guess it's only fair that you get to see the finished product," you say and shoved the drawing in front of him, "Tada! I present to you, my masterpiece!" 

Albedo takes it out of your grasp and you watched the way his eyes expanded upon sight. 

"Well? Whaddya think?" 

Words could not describe the mixture of emotions that erupted within him. Was it distinguishable or abstract? Albedo spent his time pondering between the two answers as he examined the drawing closely. Despite the lines being slightly jagged and the unevenness in the placement of his eyes, he managed to make the shape of the entire image you were trying to convey. Perhaps it was all thanks to his well trained artistic vision which gave him the ability to do so. Or maybe he was simply biased. But there wasn't a shred of doubt that this was indeed your craftsmanship. 

"You even added flowers in the background," he pointed out with amusement. 

"It's the thing you make when using your elemental burst, I couldn't fit your hand in the picture so I decided to put it somewhere empty," you informed, "Out of everything, that one took me the longest." 

"And the rabbits?" 

"They resemble Klee's bombs!" 

He lets out a chuckle, "I see." 

Albedo kept his attention downward until he was mindlessly staring at the paper in hand. This was a memory made to be carried as you moved on to your next journey and it saddens him that he could not accompany you. If only time slowed down. Albedo wanted to hold onto the memory forever, because he knew once he gave it back, he wouldn't be able to see you for an uncertain amount of time. 

"Do you really have to go?" 

His voice was barely above a whisper. Guilt crept into your heart and you gingerly layed your fingers on his gloved ones, bringing down the paper that blocked his face. A pair of teal orbs held a reflection of your image as the sun's rays casted from the side. You returned it with a reassuring grin, hoping to soothe his worries somehow, "I just need to pay a visit to my father since he's been very sick lately. I'll be fine, so don't worry too much okay?" 

Albedo turns over his palm and gave your hand a squeeze, "How long will it take?" 

"I'm not sure but it will be a while. Snezhnaya is pretty far so..." you trailed off, "But my time in Mondstadt, with Klee and with you, I will never forget! I won't even if I tried." 

When you were met with no answer, a breeze came in to fill the melancholic silence. He too will not forget and he would ensure that it was the same for you. Slowly, Albedo brought your hand up, past the center of his heart all the way to cupping his cheek. He allowed himself to indulge in your warmth, tangling the strands of his hair with your fingers while closing his eyes. Sweet flowers. You always carried the smell of sweet flowers. 

"Albedo?" You gawked, "What's the matter?" 

"...There are certain aspects where drawings can't imitate,"  he says, grip tightening ever so slightly, "How I feel against your skin, the shape of my jaw, your warmth radiating with my own. These are the things I want you to remember." 

Breath leaves your slightly parted mouth. It was unfair how straightforward Albedo could be when showing his affection. Doing as he pleases without anyone's approval to the point it would even catch you off guard since he often absorbed himself in the arts of alchemy. But during times when Albedo did choose to express his feelings, you knew they came from a place of pure genuinity. The thought made it hard for you to tear away from him, "Did you ever find out what the strings felt like then?" 

Albedo returns his gaze, long golden lashes hovering them as he smiles softly, "...I have." 

As he began to reveal his stories, the dusk sky continued to flare across the landscape with colours of passion. Red, it was the thread that had led him to you, the same string that weaved him together as a whole. Albedo lays a kiss atop of your pinky, there was a reason why Mondstadtians called him the Chalk Prince. You didn't know the intention behind his sudden affection but he knew. It was a promise, one to ensure that the thread would also have you return safely back into his arms. 

Oh how he hated the colour red. 

"Al...bedo..." 

With speed he never knew he had, Albedo scoops you into his embrace and held you close. How did everything happen so fast? He curses his mind as it proceeds to scan your injuries, drawing a conclusion where he wished to be wrong for once: 

You were beyond help. 

"Ah..haha..." you managed to laugh through bitter tears, "You don't have to say it. I know." 

His breath hitches, trying to make sense of the feeling that was slowly tearing him apart from the inside. It's not real. Of course it wasn't, it couldn't be. What other possible answer was there to explain the numbness stinging his fingers? The reason for his shaking? Everything felt so cold. Your body hardly registered to his to touch, you were losing so much blood. You were losing. He was going to lose you. 

"No," Albedo shakes his head, "We still have time. I'll go find help." 

Please, hold on. 

He forced himself to think. The ruin hunter ran off shortly after it had ambushed you, by now the Knights would eventually noticed and apprehended it on sight. They couldn't be too far. All he needed was to carry you back to safety and everyone can go home. Albedo darted his eyes all over the place, breaths becoming shallower with each passing second. Where? Where to go? Which route was best to not overexert your wounds? Think. Think. Think. Why couldn't he think? 

"A..." You watched him in your helpless state. Every part of you throbbed with pain but it pains you even more to see the renowned genius who stood atop the pedestal of elegance and grace so utterly, undoubtedly lost. This was not the goodbye you wanted, though death already had you tight in their grasps. Not yet. Using the last particle of your strength, you tried to stay alive as long as possible. Just a little bit more time. 

Albedo freezes when a trembling hand extends itself to cup around his cheek. Every single thought he had in mind vanished and was replaced by a loud ring resonating in his ears. Dreadfully, mechanically, he turns his attention to where you lay. 

"Don't cry," you whisper, "I love you, don't cry- okay?" 

Albedo grimaces, shutting his eyes closed as he allows the pent up sadness to flow out of him completely, "I can't," he said in a shaky voice, "Please. Stay." 

"I'm sorry," Your vision blurs and he hugs you even more. Drawing your final breath, you relay your most cherished words through a broken smile, "But no matter w-where I go...I won't for..ge.." 

The moment your hand fell, Albedo finally understood the difference between death and loss. 

It was...suffocating. Having the air trapped in his throat, begging to release yet it hurts to speak. The never ending stabs that pulsed within his veins rushed forth like the scraping  blizzard of Dragonspine until his whole body lost all its senses. The world was shattering. He could no longer feel your weight. He could no longer feel. 

(Y/n). 

Albedo glances at his blood stained fingers where the thread had been severed, wide eyes drowning in sorrow. What a horrible feeling. Was this a warning sent by the gods? For stepping into the boundaries of knowing too much? Ah the curse of knowledge man must bear when eating the temptatious fruit. It was the result of choosing to love you. With life, death is inevitable and with love, it will eventually bring pain. Everything had a price to pay and as an alchemist, Albedo knew that better than anyone. 

"...Meaningless..." 

But he refused to accept it. 

Cradling your corpse, he leans in and places a kiss on your forehead, lips quivering as they lingered for a second too long before gathering the strength to stand back on his feet. Nothing will stop the alchemist from reuniting with you. If the laws wished to take you away from him then he will use everything in his power to fight against those laws. 

"This is not goodbye..." Albedo said to the sleeping girl, "And it will never be." 

When the sun sinks below the plains and the stars lose their light, the sky had been replaced with a palette of darkness. It was time to go home. 

------ 

"Have you all heard about the rumours?" 

A group of knights gather in the corner as they whisper about. Sucrose stops on her tracks and hides behind a wall, clutching the book close to her chest in an attempt to stay hidden. 

"Another criminal disappeared from the dungeons? Crazy..." 

"More like creepy. I was told that place might be haunted by some dead prisoner's ghost. Even the Church is hopping onto this case." 

"Well I hope it doesn't get any worse. So many of us started going on night patrols..." 

Their voices faded out of range as the anemo user backtracks her steps carefully. Several months passed since the news of mysterious kidnappings have been announced to the public. Rumours of their whereabouts swirled around the city and much to her discomfort, Sucrose happened to catch every single one of them. There couldn't possibly be evil spirits lurking in the Favonious Headquarters right? She silently shrieks at the thought, shaking her head furiously to stop her mind from going too deep. No, I have to find him. Without wasting another minute, the anemo user sprinted towards the stairs all the way up to the second floor before stopping directly in front of her teacher's office. Despite the adrenaline that occured at the same time, she made sure to knock. 

No answer. 

"Strange, he told me he would be here today..." Sucrose muttered to herself. But suddenly she heard the sound of objects shifting from the otherside, signaling that there was indeed someone occupying the room. Without realizing, she held her breath out of anticipation. 

"Come in." 

The door creaks as she opens them, giving her enough space to slip between the gap, "Mister Albedo?" 

"You're early today," The Chief Alchemist noted from his desk, "Is there something the matter?" 

"Y-You mean you don't know? There was just another case about a person disappearing from the dungeons," Her tone became more frantic as she rambled to herself, "The kidnapper never leaves a trace and no one knows how they were able to get out. Even when we ask the guards what happened, they can't seem to remember as if...as if someone casted a spell on them!" 

"A spell?" He inquires, "I suppose that could be a possibility." 

"I think so too. I-It's the only explanation that makes sense! I mean...ghosts don't exist after all," Sucrose nervously looks down at her shoes while giving her book a squeeze, "But why? Who could be capable of such advanced techniques? No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to understand their intentions." 

"...Yes. It is a very strange occurrence indeed." 

Noticing her teacher's withdrawn attitude, Sucrose couldn't help but feel flustered at her own behaviour, "Ah my apologies Mister Albedo, I didn't mean to go off track. Have there been any progress on the investigations so far?" 

Albedo briefly glanced at the various documents splayed across his table. His reputation as an incredibly intelligent individual had reached far and wide through Mondstadt. This led to the authorities requesting his assistance regarding the recent matters, despite him specializing in the alchemical field, he was also the Captain of their Investigation Team. Although, Albedo detested partaking in things he deemed irrelevant to his research; 

"I'm afraid I would need more evidence to draw a conclusion." 

"Eh? You still need more?" 

He could not deny that the given authoritative position had provided much benefits to his own accord. 

"My expertise lies in the subject of alchemy," Albedo reasoned and proceeds to intertwine his fingers in front of his mouth, "Humans on the other hand, are very unpredictable in nature. Even the essence of their existence is hard to obtain." 

"Essence of their existence?" Sucrose repeated softly. She wanted to ask what he meant but the blank expression was evident  enough to signal his impatience. At least, that was what she thought, "Nevermind! I have something that might help," taking out a slip from her textbook, she handed it to him, "It's the report Captain Kaeya gave me. He said that the culprit might be a traitor coming from the Knights of Favonius." 

He narrows his eyes. 

"I-I think he might be right! Just think about it, we haven't found anything at all for the past few months but when we do, I sometimes feel like we're just running in circles...oh what if it's becau-" 

"Sucrose." 

"Y-Yes?!" 

Albedo calmly looks at the flustered girl, not realizing how sharp his tone was, "You're overthinking again. Perhaps it's best that you take this day off." 

"But I came here to help," she insisted, "I know it hurts to lose someone you love! Don't you understand that we're all worried about you? And Klee, she..." 

"..." 

"Please Mister Albedo, if there's anything I could do-" 

"No need," he cuts her off once again, "Your stress levels are too high. We can't go any further if you continue to act like this." 

"Oh," her ruby eyes casted to the side, "I understand..." 

"Good. Now, if you would excuse me," Albedo bid her farewell and watched as the door clicked behind her, observing every detail until he was sure that the absolute silence had returned. He picks up Kaeya's document. Such remarkable handwriting. But of course, appearances are only meant to be displayed on the surface for the Captain was a sly man, wearing a mask to shield what lies underneath. Just like his letter, they were full of innuendos and condensed meanings, orchestrated together until the truth spoke loudly to Albedo himself. 

"So, that's what he thinks." 

Perhaps the alchemist should have been a little more discreet. 

-------- 

There was a certain place in Dragonspine that no one dared to enter. But those who have, they never return. 

"Hm, no response. Now as for the next step..." 

And he was the reason why. 

Taking the sword out of the transmutation circle, Albedo turned to the snowy hill nearby and activated his alchemy. A small portion of it dissipates, revealing a trench that went so deep underground that even warmth couldn't outplay the sheer cold. It was the perfect hiding place for the evidence to lay out of sight and an environment where only he could handle. The alchemist tossed the leftover along with the others before exiting quietly, summoning back the ice to bury his victims once again. Another day, another experiment, another stain goes to his title. The path he walked upon was one littered with corpses and the sins he committed. But despite the bones crunching beneath his feet and the weight of the dead hanging on his shoulders, the alchemist was numb to it all. Like an entity floating in space with nothing to hold, he became unable to feel. 

"I'm back," When reaching the center of Starglow Cavern, Albedo puts his hand on the icicle and caressed it's hard cold surface, "Did you sleep well?" 

The girl did not respond. Her eyes were closed and her skin was as young as ever. She was frozen in time. 

"You must have." 

Albedo felt the sword beginning to shake in his grasp as it resonated with his energy. Dust particles emitted from the hilt and slowly made their climb to the side of his arm. Still, Albedo's attention did not waver, "To this day, I've been thinking about what you told me the first time we met." 

"..." 

"Follow your heart. I couldn't understand it at first but after being around your presence, I believe I can finally recognize what that term means." 

He closes his eyes as he envisioned your lively form running across the landscape. Albedo, Albedo! The sound of his name was mixed with your laughter while Klee came into the scene and caught the dandelions with you. A content smile formed on his countenance as he watched from afar, even if it was just a memory, "It's everything. The breakfast we ate together, to the nights spent camping outside, and the silly moments we shared, they bring all these colours that I never knew existed." 

"..." 

Albedo curls his fingers against the ice as he continues to lament, "Perhaps that's why I began noticing the strings around me. The closer I was to answer, the more I felt it was necessary to discover what they are. All this time, you were the answer I was searching for," Moist begins to build up in his eyes but they freeze up once reaching the corners. How cruel. Despite what he went through, he wasn't even granted the liberty to cry, "Because with you, I'm able to feel them." 

He wonders what you would think if you saw him right now. Albedo peers at his reflection casted on the crystalline surface, the frame of his face had been decorated with streaks of purple and red, spreading out like tree branches as they both fought for dominance. The teal coloured orbs you once adored were beginning to transform to a colour that reminded him of his darkest days. This was Albedo's true nature- a monster, a being that wasn't human, the essence in which you never had the chance to see. 

"I know I may not be the same as I was before," he added, "But if that is what it takes to follow your heart, will you let me feel the strings again?" 

Would you still love me the same? 

"..." 

"If so, then please understand my actions," Albedo takes a step back as he held out the sword in front of him. At last, the preparations have finally been completed. He plunges the blade to the ground with full force and the surrounding area begins to shake under the power accumulated through many, intentional sacrifices. To revive the dead was a forbidden art as it came with heavy consequences. If it weren't for Albedo's talent and quick wit, the process would have consumed him long before executing the last stage. He winces, the pain was excruciating. It was hard for him to ignore the sound of his skin cracking below his ears and all the way to his nose as they fall off in the shape of small rock-like chunks. Everything hurt so much that even death sounded like a sweet dream but Albedo couldn't afford to give up. He had already come this far, his hands completely washed with sin and his reputation already broken beyond repair, Albedo had nowhere else to go. This was his last destination. 

"Soon-" he pants between choked breaths. Soon your eyes will open. He could drown in your embrace, one that was warm and not cold. Soon he will be able revive those cherished memories from a frozen past. It was all he could think of right now. Your existence was the reason why a part of him felt whole and your death made him realize how painful it was to tear away those pieces. Albedo refused to let go of those pieces, they had already become a part of him. And if this path ended up tearing him even more, then so be it. 

"I should have stopped you the moment you were born." 

The intruder snapped him awake and he swung around to where they stood. But before Albedo could make out who it was, they lunged past him with incredible speed, kicking the sword off the ground while severing his two arms once and for all. They flew to the side, blood dyed purple trickling from the edges of his joint as he struggled to stay upright. 

"Dains...leif..." 

Dainsleif watched the alchemist fall onto his back as the light around him slowly faded away. He turned his gaze to where the objective was and noticed a girl encased within the ice. The man sighs out of relief when she shows no signs of life, he came just in time, "So this is how it ends." 

Albedo weakly stared at the blonde man. He attempted to say something but the blood caught in his mouth prevented him from that. 

"Save your breath, you won't be having any," Dainsleif remarks in a cold manner and glared at his bloodied form, "The renowned Chief Alchemist of Mondstadt and an important member of Ordo Favonious. Hmph, what an interesting turn of events. Out of everyone, I never thought you were the type to act so foolish." 

Foolish...what a foreign name to be called as. He never heard anyone tell him he was foolish. 

"Truly a pity," With a flick of a wrist, Dainsleif brought his sword to Albedo's neck. It was unbelievable how he had the endurance to go through all that pain while still breathing at this point but what is there to be expected from a monster? "Remember that all actions have consequences." 

The alchemist watched as his life flashed before him, the weight of his sins had finally caught up. He had always seen the world as a platform for his objectives and results were merely a natural cause after attempting many experiments. But death as a consequences was an unbearble realization upon his final moments. He abandoned his title, his pupil and his dearest sister. In the end, he was still unable to fulfill his duty. 

"I just..." Albedo mumbled, his words slurring together, "wanted..." 

As the ashes turn to ashes and dust becomes dust, chalk returns to the earth, forever yearning a place that can never be reached.

[wandaromanova]

an angst blurb where reader finally confesses to nat after years of being friends, but then she rejects reader, telling her that she's already met someone and is very happy w that s/o, and reader just feels numb yk? she can't control her tears, she's very hurt. the ol' unrequited love troop. thanks!

warnings: cussing, alcohol consumption

blurb requests are closed

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please do not repost or try and take ownership of my work. reblogs, likes, and comments are always welcome. <3

•❅──────────────── ‎⧗ ────────────────❅•

You were in deep shit. Okay, that sounds dramatic, but it’s true. It’s heartbreakingly true.

You had fallen in love with your best friend and teammate; Natasha Romanoff.

That may not seem like a bad thing, but it really is. You tried your hardest to keep yourself from falling for the redhead, but the heart wants what it wants.

And your heart wanted Natasha to be yours more than anything in the world.

You’ve been friends with the assassin for three years now. You had met her when she went undercover as Tony’s assistant. You guys instantly clicked.

You both had the same sense of humor and same morals and outlooks on life. You were two peas in a pod and everyone knew that.

Even after you found out her real identity, nothing changed. You had only grown closer, especially after you were both recruited as Avengers.

You’d spend many nights with Nat, and you couldn’t help but love her. Honestly, no one could resist her. She was the epitome of an amazing person and a gorgeous soul.

She cared so deeply for everyone. Whether she’s known you for years or for a few minutes, she never hesitated to be there for anyone and everyone.

You’d refrained from telling Natasha how you felt. You’d done a pretty good job at concealing your true feelings, until one night.

You both had been sitting on the couch, watching tv and eating pizza. Of course, there was vodka involved and you had accidentally let your repressed feelings out.

“I love you.” You slurred out to the redhead. Her head snapped from the tv to face you. Her eyebrows were scrunched up as she had an unreadable expression on her face.

“No, you don’t. You can’t.” Natasha’s nonchalant response hurt you. You stared at her in disbelief as her green eyes locked onto yours.

“You can’t tell me how to feel, Natasha. I love you, I’ve loved you for years now.”

You said sadly as tears threatened to escape your eyes. You had a feeling this wasn’t going to end well for you, and you were right.

“You think I haven’t noticed? I’ve known for years, but I never said anything because I don’t feel the same way.”

Okay, ouch. You didn’t know that she knew. You thought you had been so good at keeping your feelings at bay, but you guessed that you were sorely mistaken.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I have been dating Steve for over a year now.”

Your eyes widened at the revelation. She has been with Rogers for that long and you didn’t notice? She didn’t tell you? You were best friends and you guys usually told each other everything… or so you thought.

“Wh- why didn’t you tell me if you knew how I felt? Do I mean that little to you?”

You were angry. Angry with Natasha for never acknowledging your feelings and angry with yourself for falling for her in the first place.

“No, it’s the opposite of that, Y/N. I wanted to spare your feelings.” Natasha showed a small ounce of sympathy as her eyes softened.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

“I don’t want your pity, Romanoff. I wanted your honesty. God, I guess old habits really do die hard.”

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

You abruptly stood up, completely done with this conversation. Your tears were falling rapidly at this point. The realization that your fear of rejection was justified cut through you like a knife.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Natasha asked defensively as her eyes followed your every movement.

“You know exactly what I mean. You don’t have to be a double agent throughout every aspect of your life, Natalie, Natasha, or whoever the fuck you really are at this point.”

You mentioned the alias she had used when you first met her. Natasha’s eyes flashed with a pang of hurt.

You aware that Nat was just doing her job back then, but you were hurt. You wanted to cause her some sort of pain. You wanted to see if your feelings and thoughts actually mattered to her.

You stood in front of Nat, eyes connected with one another. Your irises were laced with anger and tears, but then they faded to a look of indifference as your tears abruptly stopped.

“Friends don’t standby and disregard each other’s feelings. You’re not my friend, I guess you never really were.”

You didn’t have the energy to feel anymore, you had grown numb. You weren’t quite sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing, but right now, you would say it’s great.

You turned around and walked away from the Russian who remained still in her seat.

You couldn’t feel anything anymore. Natasha had acted oblivious to your feelings when she knew.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

You felt like she had purposely led you on.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

But you didn’t care, not at this moment, anyway. You were numb, but most of all, you were done; done with Natasha Romanoff.

She was your best friend, but now she was simply a colleague. Nothing more, nothing less.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ

───────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──────────

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[himitsu-luna]

Headcanon

𔓘⭑ ࣪˖ Nct 127 as boyfriends ˖ ࣪⭑𔓘

։ຼ⚘ Taeil

~ Key words: healing hugs, comfort, easy love

Taeil is the type of boyfriend that you feel like you know for a much longer time than you actually do, just because everything feels so natural and comfortable with him. To him, relationships are meant to be easy, fun, light, safe, unproblematic, so he works with you to achieve this scenario. He feels like home and he makes loving and being loved look simple. He loves the intimacy of domestic dates, they give him the sense of bonding and growing closer. Cooking, watching movies, just lazing around, sharing secrets and also laughs while wrapped around a cozy blanket are some of his favorite things to do with you. But he also loves being adventurous, going wild once in a while, looking for interesting things to do with you deep at night. He is the type of boyfriend that shyly approaches you to give you a tight hug he was craving the whole day; that sings for you whenever you ask him to do so; that does silly things just to see you laughing; that passionately researches how to cook something just because you mentioned you wanted to eat it; that gives you his hoodies because he thinks you're the cutest with them; that hypes you up like no one else does.

։ຼ⚘ Johnny

~ Key words: joyful smiles, romance, mature love

Do you know that perfect image of a boyfriend we build in our heads and fantasize about? That's Johnny. He might look all cool and detached, but he is the warmest and most caring person you could ever meet. When he gets into a relationship, he takes it very seriously. He does his best to be the best version of himself. He is patient, easy going, mature, and loves to have long conversations with you when you go to your weekly coffee date. He is the type of boyfriend that surprises you with romantic acts out of blue and acts like he did nothing; that carries you to bed when you're too tired; that remembers little and big things about you; that picks you up wherever you are and gets out of the car just to open the door for you; that rushes to buy you medicine when you're sick and that falls asleep beside your bed. He also has his mischivious side, which makes your dynamics even more interesting. He is the boyfriend that carries you on his shoulders at a concert; that hides behind a door to jump and scare you; that tickles you until you can't laugh anymore. He is the type of boyfriend that treats you like royalty and also like his best friend.

։ຼ⚘ Taeyong

~ Key words: day dreaming gazes, companionship, reassuring love

Taeyong as a boyfriend feels like a partner for life. You can't help but catching yourself imagining a whole married life with him, but little you know he is doing the exact same thing. He is the type of boyfriend that genuinely does his best to get involved in your life and to be part of it. He asks you about your day, about your dreams, about your plans, and listens to you attentively. Communicating with him is not a problem. Actually, he is usually the first one to send you a message, or to give you a call. Also, the amount of support you receive from him is enourmous, since he admires and believes in you unconditionaly. It's natural for him to say "we" instead of "I", because he considers you in every step he takes. He is the type of boyfriend that crafts little things for you; that makes you that cute lunch boxes with even cuter post-its on them; that has a notebook filled with lyrics he wrote about you; that smiles fondly everytime he hears your name; that don't fail one day on sending you a gooodnight message; that pulls you to dance in the middle of the kitchen.

։ຼ⚘ Yuta

~ Key words: undivided attention, loyalty, intense love

Yuta is someone who won't ever leave room for doubts or insecurities regarding the love he feels for you, regarding your relationship. He can't get tired of telling and showing you how important you are to him. He gives you a lot of attention and takes good care of you. It's impossible for him to be indifferent when you're around, he is too into you, he has eyes just for you. He expresses his emotions clearly and makes his moods obvious, so the relationship is super transparent. The excitement of the relationship seems to never cease. He is naturally original and interesting, and he doesn't even need to try hard to get you hooked. Yuta's love is intoxicating, inebriating. He is the type of boyfriend that does your nails, your hair and your make up, but says that you look amazing without all of it; that gives you his jacket and also embraces you to make sure you're not cold, even though he is freezing; that turns off his phone when you're spending time together; that jokingly (or not) acts protective towards you; that doodles hearts on your arm; that winks at you from afar.

։ຼ⚘ Doyoung

~ Key words: meaningful acts, care, one and only love

Doyoung's hobby is taking care of you. And yes, it's his hobby, because he doesn't see it as an obligation or a duty. He truly likes pampering you and making your life easier. He openly admits that you are his weakness, his soft spot, the only one who can make him lose his senses and not think straight. He either is all lovey-dovey or the nagging type of lover around you. He is invested, respectful, nurturing, solid, stable, constant, and won't let anyone talk bad about you. He is the type of boyfriend that keeps little things related to you, like notes you left him or a cute sticker you glued on his arm while joking around; that gives you the last piece of french fries he got; that drops everything and travels miles and miles to meet you because you said you were lonely; that unconciously does little things for you, like putting tooth paste onto your tooth brush and handing it to you; that always carries two umbrelas because he knows you often forget yours at home; that keep staring at you in awe, but denies it strongly when you catch him doing so.

։ຼ⚘ Jaehyun

~ Key words: intertwined fingers, sincerity, movie like love

Jaehyun is the type of boyfriend full of surprises. He makes you wonder what is going through his head, because it's quite difficult to read him. But he knows what he feels. As you get to know him better, you learn that he is the sweetest bean. For example, you get to know that when he looks distant or distracted around you, he is actually trying his best to hide from you some random cute romantic surprise he prepared. Even though he is not that good at expressing his emotions, he tries to put his love into words from time to time, and you just can feel it through the tender looks he gives you. He is chill and down to earth with most of things, but he daydreams a lot about you. He is also an interesting person with interesting thoughts, and sometimes you feel like your in a romantic comedy movie. He is the type of boyfriend that says "you're amazing" out of nowhere; that back hugs you whenever he sees the opportunity to do so; that gives you the best massages ever; that wants to hear stories from your childhood; that looks forward to your reaction when he tells you a joke or a story; that brags about you to his friends; that secretly takes personality tests and looks into astrology to see how compatible you two are: if he gets a positive answer, he goes "I knew it!", and if he gets a negative answer, he goes "I don't believe this anyways".

։ຼ⚘ Winwin

~ Key words: soft caresses, growing together, special love

Once Winwin falls in love, he wishes it's forever. He is always amazed by you and by how you changed his whole world and his whole vision of people, of the world, and of himself. He has a huge sense of honor and commitment towards you, so he does his best to be a good boyfriend. He does that quietly though, with little meaningful acts and shy words. He is usually pretty calm and composed, but sometimes he becomes a cute soft mess around you. When this happens, his reactions ranges from "malfunctioning and not knowing what to do at all" to "showing off his skills so you'll be impressed". He is the type of boyfriend that goes shopping to buy something for himself and ends up with twenty items for you ; that steals a kiss on your cheek while you're asleep; that says he is going to read your palm just to have an excuse to hold your hands; that, after twenty minutes watching a movie with you, side by side, murmurs "come here" and extends his arm so you can hug and cuddle him, all of that while avoiding eye contact (but at the end he is all smiley)

։ຼ⚘ Jungwoo

~ Key words: endless cuddles, connection, colorful love

Jungwoo is the type of boyfriend who just feels right. You look at him and wonder how you could end up with someone that matches your vibes so well. He accepts you and loves you exactly the way you are, for the way you are. He is not only sweeter than candy, he is also the funniest, the cutest, the most supportive, the most lovely, the most unique and interesting boyfriend ever. He feels intensily what you're feeling, so he can understand you well. He cries when you cry, he laughs when you laugh, he is by your side because he wants to be. He is the type of boyfriend that stays awake with you all night long when you need to finish an assignment so he can help you and so you won't feel lonely; that creates a whole new special sign language to communicate with you ; that fights for food with you just to give you everything at the end; that goes live on instagram just to scream "y/n, I love you" and then disconnects; that can't stop talking about you to everyone; that uses your picture as his cellphone background.

։ຼ⚘ Mark

~ Key words: sweet kisses, happiness, pure love

Mark is someone who wants to give you the whole world, and he works hard to do so. He is very intuitive and can tell what you're thinking with just one look. Being with him feels easy, recharging, and you see sincerity in all of his acts and words. There's no drama, no second intentions, he just genuinely wants to see you happy. He is the type of boyfriend that prays for you every night before sleeping; that may be clueless about a lot of things, but notices when you have the slightest change in your appearance; that takes melted candies out of his pockets and says they are a gift to you with the brightest and most innocent smile on his face; that creates raps about your awesomeness at random times; that gets too tired of giggling while cuddling you and then sleeps in your arms; that get inspired by some cheesy movie to do cheesy things with you but gets all shy about it afterwards, which makes everything even more adorable; that helps you drying your hair and gives you little pecks while the towel covers your eyes.

։ຼ⚘ Haechan

~ Key words: heart fluttering words, sharing, playful love

Haechan is someone who makes you feel special. He knows every single detail about you, and it seems that he understands you more than you do yourself, because he always knows what to say to make you feel better. He is affectionate, flirty, enjoys to make you blush, but often he is the one who blushes like crazy. He values the deep bond you share, and is proud of himself to have you by his side. He is the type of boyfriend that diligently prepares a midnight snack for you and draws a big heart with ketchup on your plate; that asks you what you are going to wear on your date with him, so he can wear something similar; that has a bracelet with your initial on it; that does skincare with you; that calls you at raining nights and stays with you on the phone for hours to distract you from the thunders you hate so much; that runs to you when he sees you; that plays rock paper scissors with you to decide who will get you two food, but actually it doesn't matter who wins, he will do everything for you at the end.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

•° thanks @arieseris333 for the request! 💕

•° taglist - @starrdustville @mairah-shaikh @mairahshaikh @cupidluvstarrz @kpopsnowball @kaepopsicle @purplepsycho03 @najatheangel @dundun-baby

* If you want to be added to or removed from the taglist, just send me an ask or a message (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

•° Masterlist

...

[pathetic-dumpling]

We've Come To A Crossroad (What Do We Do Now?) - Guard Dog AU

Rumors about what guards the casino begin to spread and grow, and based on the fact that no one has been allowed into the prison for months, Techno has a growing suspicion of who the casino's new guard dog is. Rescuing Dream doesn't go quite as planned.

this au belongs to the wonderful @stabbysideblog why has been hyping me up this entire fic tysm bro i really appreciate it (i also have a small tag list as the bottom, which i don't normally do, but if u got a notif at the bottom that's why :D)

Read on AO3 instead!

Warning: extreme dehumanization, manipulation, conditioning, torture, not quackity+sam friendly, PTSD, abuse/ve relationships, unhealthy dynamics, mental instability, referenced force-feeding, the process of throwing up, everyone is handling their trauma poorly, this could be a whumptober fic if I wanted it to be tbh, Dream has a shock collar

The more Technoblade learns about Las Nevadas, the more worried he gets. Not only is the country… empire… estate- whatever it is- becoming an economic powerhouse (a title that should only belong to him and Ranboo- who worked for their wealth), but some nasty rumors have been spreading about the place. Particularly about the fabled dog that guards the casino.

Now, Techno isn't stupid. He knows Sam works for Las Nevadas, and he also knows that Sam is the sole power running the prison. Not only does that kind of absolute power lead to loopholes for prisoner treatment, but nobody has been allowed in or around the prison since the casino opened. Which is worrying. Judging by the vague and fleeting description of the thing lurking in the dark corners of Las Nevadas, Techno has an idea of just what is happening to Dream.

So, as with all of his growing worries, Techno brings it up with the Syndicate. Everyone has something to say about Las Nevadas. Ranboo is worried about Tubbo's potential involvement with the country as it develops, and Niki states that something about it irks her the wrong way. Something about the same kind of sickeningly sweet words of freedom of expression and self that L'manberg was first built on. Phil agrees with Techno on the contracts and overreach of power starting to look a little too close to a government with nothing to rival it. So they decided to rival it and see precisely what they're dealing with.

"Ranboo, Niki…" Techno sighs. His ears flop down apologetically. "I love you guys, and I'm incredibly proud of all of the progress you've made, but I'm not sure I feel comfortable throwing you guys into a hostile environment like this."

"No, no… we- I… I understand, Techno," Niki says. She grips her hidden dagger tightly, pressing her lips together. Techno seems unconvinced.

"The only reason I'm taking Phil with me is because I know I'll be outnumbered, and I know how to work with him, alright? I don't wanna worry about you guys if something goes wrong. Me 'n Phil can and have found our way out of plenty of dire situations. I trust you with my life; I just don't trust your lives with me."

Niki sighs and smiles again, this time a little less tight. "You know I trust your judgment, Techno."

"I know, I know." Techno dips his head bashfully, scratching at his cheek. "Also. Uh. It would look a little suspicious if all of us showed up. We can't have them knowing we know something."

"I'm sure they'll get that message just fine from our strongest members showing up on their doorstep," Ranboo pipes up, handing off the invisibility potions he had been tasked with brewing.

"'Strongest' is a subjective word, Ranboo." Techno takes the potion, passing half to Phil, who is checking over his bowstring. "You two are better than us at plenty of things. You ready to go, Phil?"

"Yep!" Phil gives the group a thumbs up, smiling brightly. "Right. We'll see you guys when we get back from checking this shit out. Take care, don't burn down the house. You know the drill. We'll come back with reports, and we'll go from there."

Phil ruffles Ranboo's hair with a light chuckle and gives Niki a tight hug on his way out. His wings wrap around Niki briefly before he pulls back, ruffling them to puff out his feathers. Techno follows after, lightly bumping his forehead against wherever he can reach on the two before he and Phil are ushered out the door. Techno takes out his invitation to Las Nevadas, checking the ominous set of coordinates in the bottom corner. It seems like everyone had been sent some kind of invitation because nothing about it is personalized, but it gives them the country's location, so Techno can't complain about his random spam mail.

Phil breaks off from his side as soon as they arrive at Las Nevadas. He downs his 8-hour invisibility potion, shucking off all of his armor and tucking it away safely.

"Stay safe, Phil," Techno calls.

"You too, mate!" Phil's voice filters through the air around Techno, landing softly on his ears as Phil's form disappears into the distance. Techno, now alone, walks into the main entrance of Las Nevadas, passing the large sign, flashing in the dull sunlight. Techno follows the road into the country, passing countless large, beautiful, but ultimately empty buildings. The casino lights shine off the sleek metal and polished windows, creating various colors splashed and mixed together. Techno huffs, glancing around for any sight of Phil. There's nothing, not even the distant sound of Phil's wings flapping as he works. It's both comforting and terrifying.

On one hand, Phil and Techno won't get caught scouting out the casino. On the other, Techno is alone, something he's come to be very afraid of.

Techno walks into the casino, immediately greeted by flashing lights, bombarding him with bright colors and loud, repetitive sounds. A voice cuts through the barrage of sights and sounds, and soon enough, Quackity is walking up to Techno with a wide grin. Something glints in his eyes that makes Techno's hand grip where the hilt of his sword usually is. Quackity doesn't seem to notice as his smile widens, pulling at the scar running from his lip to his eye.

"Technoblade!" He says, throwing his arms out. He tosses one around Techno's shoulders the best he can, ushering him into the casino.

"Y'know, pal, I never really thought I'd see you out here," Quackity drawls, his hand tightening against Techno's arm ever so slightly before releasing. Techno's tail swished uncomfortably.

"Well, you know how it is," Techno chuckles. "I thought I'd come to see what the fuss is all about."

Quackity chuckles lightly, mirroring Techno. "Quite the fuss there is." His face rests into something a little more neutral, a closed-lip smile still finding its way onto his face as he regards Techno. Something uncomfortable flashes in his eyes, so brief that an untrained eye would miss it entirely. After a short, uncomfortable second, Quackity releases Techno's arm, taking a few steps back and dusting his hands off with showmanship-like grace.

"Well. I'll leave you to wander, Technoblade. Take your time, see everything Las Nevadas has to offer, and, of course," he chuckles, "spend your money wisely. Couldn't have you going into debt, could we?"

"...Yeah. Of course."

Something uncomfortable wells up in Techno's throat, and it doesn't leave until Quackity is far out of sight. He sighs shakily. His hand moves to grip around his communicator, hidden away in one of his many pockets, feeling for any kind of buzz that would indicate a message from Phil. He shorts when nothing happens, cursing himself for going so utterly alone into a place like this. To be fair, he didn't expect… whatever Quackity was.

He can't focus on that now. Techno has suspicions he needed to act on. Information to gather and people to find. He sets off, glancing around at every corner of the casino that might hide something. Every "staff only" entry, every window that seems suspiciously placed, every piston and dispenser he can't immediately find the use for, anything and everything the casino might have up its sleeve. He plays a few games, of course, but those experiences are primarily miserable. The games are too loud, the lights are too bright, and there are too many people, but he can't just waltz in and spend nothing. It makes Techno sad to see his gold taken from him, but he knows it's for a good cause.

Maybe an hour or so into Techno's exploration, a bit of movement catches his eye. He only saw it briefly, a small flash of the sparkling purple of enchantments, but it was something new. Techno quietly moved over to where he saw the flash of purple, glancing around the corner and stepping carefully. His hoofs scuff against the marble flooring, and Techno's breath catches in his throat.

There stands Dream, in a set of enchanted Netherrite armor that clearly isn't his own. It doesn't fit him at all, body completely dwarfed by the sharp edges. Techno cringes at the bruises he knows that will inevitably form. Techno steps forward, slowly, coming to a stop right in front of Dream. He doesn't acknowledge Techno.

"Dream?" Techno asks softly.

There's no response. Dream's face looks like there's nothing behind it. Like every human part of him was stripped away, and he was left in this dark corner of the casino. Ugly, purple bruises stain under Dream's eyes, and the more Techno states, the more he realizes that the armor Dream wears doesn't fit him because he's nothing more than a skeleton pulled together by a thin layer of skin. Bruises and scars litter every inch on Dream that's visible. His breathing is shallow, almost wet, and it stutters and struggles to leave his chest.

The part that makes Techno want to throw up the most is the collar around Dream's neck. Red, puffy scars bleed together with bruises, and Techno realizes with absolute horror that it's a shock collar. A dog tag fits neatly between too-sharp of collar bones. It doesn't have his name. It doesn't even have his fucking name on it. Just Property of Las Nevadas. Techno reaches out a shaky hand, almost scared that Dream will snap under even the most gentle of holds.

"What happened here, Dream?" He asks. Almost shamefully, Techno's hand stops just above Dream's arm. He's too scared to touch him. "What happened to you?"

There's nothing. There's nothing behind Dream's eyes. No light, no fear, just bone-deep exhaustion and a wild kind of desperation. Techno feels like he's going to vomit.

He pulls out his communicator. Damn being quiet about this and keeping the thing hidden. He calls Phil, eyes anxiously flitting between Dream and the small device as it rings.

"Oh, thank god. Phil?" Techno asks.

"Yes, mate?" Phil's voice crackles through the speakers. "Oh shit. You sound stressed. What happened?"

"Are you done?"

"Wh- uh… Yeah. Yeah, I'm done. Everything's mapped out, just like you wanted. Did you find something?"

Techno swallows. "Yeah. We're- we have to go. We need to start planning."

"Shit. Alright. I'll meet you by the sign."

"Yep. Yep." Techno starts walking through the casino. He rips himself away from Dream, but he feels like he left his heart behind to bleed out the longer he walks.

"Techno. Techno, stop." Phil's voice cuts through the growing panic. Techno stops. "You sound like you're panicking, mate. Take a deep breath. Calm down. Leave slowly and calmly, alright? Whatever the fuck you saw- Quackity can't know that you know. Get out, we'll talk, and then you can panic all you want when we get home, alright?"

Home. Home… right. The Syndicate is waiting for a report. For a plan of action. Techno starts walking, this time slowly, methodically, stepping out of the casino. He tries not to throw a worried glance behind him, but the bright flash of enchanted armor makes him seize up. Techno glances back quickly, but it's not Dream. It's Sam, and he's carrying something, but Techno doesn't want to think about it.

It takes everything he has to not run away from the oppressive feeling of the casino. Techno releases a breath he didn't know he was holding as soon as he reaches the sign, something thick and vile dislodging from his throat and finally allowing him to breathe. Phil appears at his side seconds later, clutching an empty bottle, looking half as bad as Techno feels.

"Holy shit," Phil says. "What the fuck did you see in there?"

Techno swallows. He reaches out, grabbing Phil's hand and holding it tightly. "I'll- I'll tell you later. We have to. We have to get home. We've gotta tear that place apart."

Phil's expression hardens, and he squeezes Techno's hand back. "Let's go, then."

They make it back home. Techno's chest aches. Ranboo and Niki want to know what happened, but he brushes past them, climbing up the ladder into his room. His heart, bleeding out on the casino floor, feels like it's finally caught up to him and lodged itself in his throat, filling it with blood. It makes him gasp for air. He takes out the map Phil had created, the key at the top showing everything Phil had found. Every flaw, every place functionality had been sacrificed for style, everywhere they would hide or place traps. He pulls out his own notes next, scrawled on several sheets of small paper he had taken while exploring.

Techno takes a deep breath. He thinks about Dream's gaunt form, the sheer nothingness behind his eyes, and gets to work.

Niki gingerly passes out the steaming cups of tea, sending a worried glance to Phil and Ranboo. Techno had gotten home days ago from Las Nevadas, and he hasn't left his room since. He looked shaken when he arrived home, but Phil seemed to know just as much as the rest of them.

"What do you think he saw in there?" Ranboo quietly pipes up. He holds his cup of tea gently, content to let the warmth sink into the pads on his fingers and palm. Phil shrugs.

"Whatever it was, it must've been fucked. He called me and just asked me if I was done like he was begging me to leave. It's… I haven't heard Techno sound like that in a while."

Niki hums. She sips on her tea. "Well," she says. "He knows that we'll help with whatever he plans. At least, I hope he knows."

"He knows," Phil soothes. "I've seen Techno isolating because he doesn't trust people. This isn't it- he would've moved out of the house by now. He's probably just shaken. He'll come out soon."

"I hope so," Niki sighs. "I'm worried."

Almost as if on cue, Techno slides down the ladder into the main room. He turns around, facing the Syndicate. They haven't left the cabin since Techno arrived home, and they all look at him with hopeful eyes.

"I… I have a plan," Techno says. He tosses a scroll onto the table, which Phil immediately reaches out and takes.

"Mate, you look exhausted. Did you sleep at all?"

"I actually just napped because I knew you'd say something. But. We need to do this. Like, now."

"Mate…" Phil starts hesitantly. He unrolls the scroll, reading over it quickly. "God, yeah, I guess… Okay. Yeah, let's head out."

Techno sighs, and his shoulders sag.

"Ranboo, Niki, can you guys please stay here in case anything goes wrong?"

Ranboo and Niki share a look, shifting uncomfortably, but they nod.

"We'll take care of everything," Niki says. Ranboo hums in agreement.

They gather supplies. Techno fills his ender chest and tucks one away safely on his utility belt, concealing it with the sash around his waist. Niki offers them golden apples, which Techno takes gratefully. Ranboo vwoops quietly, mimicking a comfort noise as he bumps his head against Techno's shoulder. The action makes him laugh, and Ranboo is relieved to see some tension drain from Techno's posture.

Techno takes Phil's hand tightly, and they head out again, and Ranboo and Niki see them off with kind but worried looks. Phil downs another invisibility potion, not letting go of Techno's hand until they're reached the entrance of Las Nevadas. They part with a quick squeeze before Techno feels the telltale breeze of Phil taking off. His wing had healed well, and as much as it pained Techno to keep Phil's flight a secret from the rest of the Syndicate, he couldn't risk anyone else finding out that Phil could fly just yet. He'll tell them later. Techno sighs and follows the road down to the casino.

He enters mostly unnoticed, only checking in with one of the random employees at the entrance. Techno isn't as nearly careful about discreteness as he was last time, walking swiftly through the casino. He retraces his steps back to where he first found Dream, almost stumbling over himself when Dream is nowhere to be found. His ears perk up, listening closely for the clang of armor or even the slight wetness of Dream's breathing.

He wanders around the casino, looking in every crevice he can with his ears perked. He tries to suppress the small noises that bubble up in his throat. He knows making calls would raise suspicion, more than Techno is already raising, and Dream wouldn't know how to respond to them anyway. His tail thrashes behind him. An hour passes, and there's still nothing. Techno's communicator buzzes with a message from Phil, which provides a small comfort. Okay. Two minutes.

In the middle of his frantic searching, Techno catches sight of Dream walking through the halls of the casino. Dream's eyes look sharp, calculating, but he falters ever so slightly when he sees Techno. He even stumbles in his smooth walk, making Techno cringe at how Dream's armor clangs against his body.

"Dream," Techno sighs. This time, he doesn't fear to reach out and grasps Dream's arm gently. He pulls softly, watching Dream's wide eyes as he allows himself to get pulled along. Or maybe he's too weak to resist. They don't have a lot of time, so they need to leave quickly.

"C'mon, Dream," Techno says softly, and Dream follows.

Techno steps back once, and then he pauses at the sudden look in Dream's eyes.

"Technoblade," Quackity says. Techno stops, looking over his shoulder. Quackity's arms are neatly tucked behind his back, but Techno doesn't miss the look he gives Dream. Dream immediately starts trying to pull his arm away, which prompts Techno to hold on tighter.

"What are you doing, Techno?" Quackity asks. His smile looks a fake sort of polite. It pulls at his face wrong with quietly concealed anger bubbling up to the surface.

"Oh, you know how it is," Techno says. He turns around casually, but he doesn't let go of Dream. "Just checking things out."

Quackity hummed. He straightened his spine out, Techno hadn't even noticed Quackity had leaned forward, and he tilted his head slightly. "You know, I really didn't expect to see you back here. You left before I could say goodbye, and, well… this place doesn't really seem like your scene, does it?"

Techno fixes his own posture. "I had business here," is all he offers.

Quackity hums and Dream pulls again. Techno doesn't let go.

"Well, I help but see you've got a grip on my, uh… employee." Quackity looks directly at Dream now. "He's supposed to be making his rounds of the casino right now. Why don't you let him get back to business?"

"Oh. Well." Techno cocks his head. "I can't socialize?"

"He's on duty," Quackity repeats. A small bite crawls into his voice. Dream tugs harder.

"Well." Techno starts walking, tugging Dream along with him. "I'm sort of on duty, too? I guess? Anyway, long story short, I need Dream for a bit."

"Techno, cut the bullshit-"

"Yeah, yeah, that's great." Techno waves his hand dismissively. Thankfully, before he had found Dream, he had made almost a complete loop back to the casino entrance. He could see the door already, which was a small blessing. Quackity follows behind them, nearly stepping on Dream's heels. He pulls out his communicator, probably dialing Sam.

On cue, Sam appears from behind one of the staff-only doors, skimming the situation before moving in. Steam is gently released from his mask in something Techno thinks is an intimidation method, so he mirrors it with a snort. Dream starts pulling harder than before, trying to move away from Techno and to Sam. Both Sam and Quackity were getting uncomfortably close, and Dream was getting more stressed by the second, tugging desperately against Techno's grip. Techno really didn't want to make a whole scene out of this, it would've been more trouble, and it's worth it to just go guns blazing, but the situation is looking pretty tight. He plucks his ender chest off his belt, tossing it to the ground and pulling out his sword. Sam pulls out his trident in response.

Just then, the door opens behind Techno. Phil appears around Techno, his wings, big and black, almost seeming to absorb the light around him. He holds up a button, drawing the attention away from Techno and Sam.

"Everybody stop!" He yells. "I've got a flying machine loaded with TNT right above this place."

Sam and Quackity pause dead in their tracks. They share an uneasy look. At Phil's words, the various players and guests of the casino stop. They see him, standing with Techno and Dream, standing off with Quackity and Sam, and panic fills the room.

"So let us go without any fuss," Phil adds with an easy smile. "With him, and I won't set it off."

"There's no flying machine above the casino," Quackity challenges. "Somebody would've seen you towing up. Bullshit."

"Who says I towered?" Phil's smile grows, and his wings fluff up behind him. Quackity's expression hardens with something akin to envy. Before he can speak, though, Sam whistles like he would with a dog. Techno's stomach drops at how Dream perks up, looking only at Sam.

"Dream, come," Sam says.

Dream tugs against Techno's hold, trying to walk towards Sam.

"Wh- no. Dream-"

"Come on, Techno," Sam drawls, settling into himself easily. "Dream wants to come back and stay with us. Just let him go, and we can act like nothing ever happened."

"Absolutely not," Techno bites out. He tugs Dream back, resisting the puny, woeful sound that escapes his friend. "He is not going back with you."

Sam hums. He stares Dream down, who pauses in his struggling. "Fetch."

Dream stills, and then he's grabbing Techno's sword out of his hand, nearly dropping it due to the weight. He swings, but Phil grabs Dream, pulling him just out of reach.

"Alright, fuck this," Phil says. "Techno!"

"Got it!"

Techno takes Dream and bolts out the door. Phil presses the butter, and the flying machine above the casino whirrs to life, dropping TNT down onto the building. Everyone runs out of the casino as explosions crash through the ceiling, screaming and yelling. Phil and Techno lead the group, running away from the casino and down the long road. Dream still struggles in their grasp, but being pulled along makes him far too unsteady on his feet for him to sort himself and try to hurt either of them, though.

His grip suddenly tightens on Phil, however, and he falls straight to the ground. Phil stops, looking back to see Dream on his knees, wheezing violently as his body convulses.

"Tech- Techno!" He calls. "What the- what the fuck's happening?"

After just a short glance, Techno knows what's going on. A quiet clicking sound fills the air, in time with every time Dream flinches. "It's his collar," he says. Techno leans down on one knee, holding his hands out calmly. Dream growls at him, but it's cut off by a sharp whimper.

"What? Collar?"

"I'll explain when we get home, Phil, but I need you to keep him still."

Phil, while confused, nods, wrapping his arms around Dream's body and restraining his arms. Techno manages to get his hand by Dream's neck, pulling back when Dream bites him but tries again after Phil gets a hold of his head, too. Techno unbuckles the collar, and it immediately detaches from Dream's frail throat.

"What the fuck," Phil breathes. Techno sighs, gently dragging his hand across Dream's throat as soon as his body goes slack. Techno doesn't know what does it- maybe the shock, the pain, or the months of starvation and abuse it must've taken to put Dream in the state, but he's out cold. He picks Dream up carefully, swallowing something down when he notices how Dream clutches to the collar, even in his sleep.

"I couldn't leave him in there, Phil."

Phil sighs, wings sagging behind him with the movement. "Yeah, I know, mate. You would've told me this was an… extraction… rescue mission. I would've headed over a lot faster."

"I didn't want you to object." Techno ducks away when he says this, ears drooping slightly.

"Mate," Phil breathes. "We all saw how shaken you were when we visited this shit-show the first time. Plus, Dream looks…." Phil trails off, looking pointedly at Dream's neck. "I wouldn't object, mate. I trust you. I trust your judgment."

Silence hangs heavy between them.

"Niki and Ranboo do, too," Phil tacks on, bumping Techno with his wing. Techno nods.

There are no Nether portals to Las Nevadas.

When they arrive home, Dream is still asleep and still clinging to his collar. He whines pathetically every time Techno tries to take it away, and despite what it stands for, Techno doesn't have the heart to take anything else from Dream. Niki and Ranboo had taken care of everything from health potions to food, which Techno was thankful for because Dream certainly needed some of that. Niki greets him at the door, almost screaming when she sees what he has in his arms.

"Techno-" she starts.

"I know, I know. It's a long story, I promise. Thank you so much for preparing everything, but I don't know when he'll wake up or how he'll do around people. He's a little aggressive to Phil and me, and I don't want anyone else getting hurt, so I'm going to have to kick you out now."

"Wh… I…"

"I'll explain everything. Just. Like. Give me a day, please."

Niki's eyes land on Dream's frail body, and Techno can see Niki's concern well up in her chest. At least she isn't demanding that Techno throw Dream outside or give him back to Las Nevadas.

"What has he last eaten?" She asks, stepping to the side and allowing Techno to deposit Dream on the couch.

"I don't know. Me 'n Phil are gonna check over him and see how much work we've gotta do. Where's Ranboo?"

"Uh- he went to the Nether for potion ingredients."

"Great. Can you make sure he doesn't come back to the cabin? I don't want him seeing this."

Niki swallows, and she nods.

"Thank you, Niki." Techno bows his head. "Take care of yourself. I'll explain everything soon."

Niki heads out not long after, squeezing past Phil through the door. Phil closes it gingerly, casting a look towards Techno.

"You've got everything taken care of?"

"I hope so."

Phil nods. He pulls up a stool next to the couch, leaning over Dream's form. His face scrunches as he looks Dream over, murmuring to himself softly as he traces the sharp edges of Dream's body. Obviously, he's been starved, but there's plenty of evidence to add physical abuse to the list. They don't know what kind of conditions Dream was held in for these past few months but based on what little they witnessed, there seems to have been some extreme mind games happening, too.

They do what they can. Dream coughs up almost every health potion they try to give him, and trying to get some food in him is looking like a worse and worse idea the longer they try to treat Dream. He seems even skinnier without his armor, every protruding bone and bruise on display without it. Techno takes the collar out of Dream's hands softly. His heart aches at how Dream's fingers twitch around nothing until Phil moves to inspect his hands. Techno can't take it away- not yet- despite the awful feeling that settles in his stomach because of it. So he does the next best thing. He rips out the small metal prongs and files down the edges, breaking the collar open and disrupting all the Redstone packed inside it. At the very least, the collar isn't functional anymore.

Techno loses track of how long he and Phil work, but when they're finally done, Techno drops Dream off in a bedroom they had created for when Syndicate members stayed the night. The bed is nice and comfortable, and it shouldn't press on Dream's unprotected bones too much. He should be comfortable here. Techno hopes that he'll be happy here, too. He doesn't know what he's just disrupted in Dream's fragile mind by taking him out of Las Nevadas. He knows he had to. Dream was withering away in there, and it would've stayed that way, but he can't help the inevitable guilt that'll come when Dream starts trying to figure himself out again.

---

Dream wakes up in a bed, which is weird. Sam told him dogs don't deserve beds. It's soft and comfortable, and there's more than one blanket and two pillows. Dread grows in Dream's throat. He did something wrong; he just knows it. He's disappointed Sam in some way, and this is punishment. It's a trick, a new way to teach him a lesson; Dream just knows it. His armor is gone. Where is it? It's not hanging anywhere.

Dream nearly falls out of the bed, trying to pull himself off it. He knows he shouldn't be in it, and the longer he is, the more upset Sam will be. He needs to show Sam that he knows his place- that he'll be good. He won't sleep in anything he's not supposed to, and he won't say anything he's not supposed to, and-

This isn't Dream's room. Where is his plant? Why does his neck feel empty? With a sudden spike of panic, Dream notices that his collar is gone. Oh god. He finally did it- he pushed Sam off the edge, and this is the last Dream gets before he's kicked to the stress.

Sam is the only person there for him- what will Dream do? How will he get food? How will he know what to do with himself? He can't- why isn't he in his room? Where is he in the casino? He's never seen this room, and he knows the layout of the building like his life depends on it (it does, it does, Sam will be upset if he gets lost, Quackity will be angry-). What room is this? Where is he?

Through his frantic searching, Dream finds his collar hidden amongst the sheets of the bed. A deep breath releases itself from Dream's chest as his fingers trace over the leather. He still had his collar. Something- something must've happened.

Dream glances around the room as he slips his collar back on. It pushes it against his skin, and Dream checks the tightness just to make sure he's done it right. He can barely get his finger between the leather and his neck. Perfect. Just the way Quackity likes it.

The door creaks behind him, and Dream is suddenly glad he's fallen to his knees like this already. He feels drowsy, and through the panic, he feels slow. He definitely wouldn't be able to react promptly like he should. Dream quietly berates himself, keeping his eyes low as a figure steps into the door. It's obscured slightly, but judging by the broad shoulders, it's Sam.

"Dream?" That's not Sam. Dream tenses, sucking in a sharp breath. Techno? What is he doing?

"Dream, c'mon, buddy." Techno drops to his knees, and he shouldn't, he shouldn't because only dogs belong on the floor, and Techno is so much better than that. "Come on, get up."

Techno's hands are carefully placed onto Dream's shoulders, but he's already scrambling to stand. This has to be a trick, right? Where's Quackity? Dream risks a glance around, but he can't see anyone else.

"Whoah, hold on, okay," Techno chuckles nervously. "Pace yourself here, Dream. Are you… you feeling alright? You hungry?"

Dream's stomach tightens at the mention of food. Okay. Okay. He knows what kind of day it is now. Techno is just… He doesn't know why Techno is here or what he's doing. Maybe he's come along to help. Dream feels sour at the idea of being too much for Quackity and Sam to handle. He tries! He really does. He tries to be good. He swallows back the guilt and nods like he's supposed to. Yes. He's hungry,

Techno sighs with something that sounds like relief and pats Dream's shoulders lightly. "We've got some bread for you if you think you can handle it."

...bread? They've never tried bread before. Quackity likes to stick with steak, meats, anything thick that'll make Dream gag. Sam just uses leftover produce. He wasn't going to voice his confusion, though. He hadn't been given permission to speak, so he just nods again, and Techno smiles. Okay. Good. He's never worked with Techno before. He doesn't know the right answers from wrong. Doing what he's trained to seem to work so far, though.

Techno tells Dream to follow him, which he does without a word and without hesitation. His hip clips a table he hadn't fully registered, and Dream stops dead in his tracks, ready for Techno to turn around and yell at him for being so clumsy. Instead, though, Techno asks if he's okay, and lacking a better response, Dream nods. Techno sighs, and his ears droop, which nearly mesmerized Dream. Sam's ears never flicked or perked like Techno's do.

Techno brings Dream to the kitchen. Phil is there, wings drooped against his back and making some tea. His eyes light up when he sees Techno, then Dream, and his expression morphs into a tight smile. Phil is here. Where's Sam? Where is Dream? He glances around, starting to feel incredibly uneasy at the realization that this isn't the casino.

"Hey, mate," Phil says gently, putting down his cup. Dream's attention snaps back to him. He shouldn't have let himself wander like that. "How are you feelin'?"

Dream's attention turns to Techno. Can he speak? Is he allowed to respond? Techno looks busy, though, and doesn't tell Dream anything. Doesn't even look his way. That's okay, though, because Dream usually knows what to do when he receives nothing for instruction. Well. If it's Quackity. Or Sam. He doesn't know what he's allowed here. So, deciding to play it safe like a good dog, Dream doesn't respond. Phil follows Dream's trail of sight with an uneasy look. His wings pull closer to his spine, fluffing up ever so slightly. Dream doesn't react.

Techno pulls out three chairs but doesn't tell Dream to sit, and dogs don't belong at the table, so Dream stands and waits like he's supposed to. Begging for scraps is what bad dogs do, and Dream is a good dog. His eyes follow Techno's hands, though, tensing when he picks up a knife, but it's never turned on Dream. Techno cuts a slice of bread, steam escaping from the warmth of the inside, and turns back to the table. He looks a little surprised to see Dream still standing.

"You can sit," Techno offers. Dream nods and sits down where he stands, making himself comfortable on the floor. Techno looks… unsettled with this action, casting a worried glance at Phil at the table. He doesn't tell Dream to move or get up, however, so Dream sits still. He meets Techno halfway and reaches out to take the bread when it's handed to him. They've never handed the food to him before. To be fair, that was during Dream's exercises, and he was blindfolded for those, so it would've been a mute sentiment. Techno looks at Dream like he's expecting him to eat, and never one to disappoint, Dream takes a bite.

The bread is… good. It's really good. Dream hasn't tasted something so nice in a long time. It's warm and light but sweet on his tongue, but not in an oppressive way, not like Sam's pies or Quacity's meat. Dream takes another bite. He chews. He swallows. Techno smiles and sits down across from Dream.

"Don't eat too much," Techno gently chides after a few more bites, and Dream immediately stops. Techno looks a little confused and tilts his head. "Are you… done?"

Dream nods because that's what he is supposed to do. He's supposed to stop when he's told. Techno looks... displeased. Dream chose the wrong answer.

"Look, I just don't want you to get sick, is all. Do you feel sick?"

Slowly, Dream shakes his head. He was really enjoying the bread.

"If you can take a couple more bites, I'd say go for it. We kinda need to get some food into ya."

Dream nods again and slowly takes another bite. He watches Techno for any indication that this is the wrong choice, that Dream has made a mistake, but it never comes. He finished the slice, finally starting to feel his stomach cramp, and Dream tucked his hands into his lap.

"Alright." Techno sighs. He leans back on his arms, tilting his head slightly. Dream stares at his hands. Where is Quackity and Sam? Dream isn't in the casino anymore, but they should still be close by, right? He glances around, eyes scanning the room he's in. The walls are bright off-white, with Pella-style windows. It's warm with various finances and chests. Cozy. Small. Not the casino. He already knows that, but outside there's… nothing. Snow. There's not supposed to be snow anywhere near the casino. Quackity doesn't like it.

Panic crashes down on Dream like a tidal wave. Where is Sam? Where's Quackity? How did he get here? What's going on? Why did he wake up in a bed with his collar removed? His collar. Dream touches it, feeling dents in the material. Has Techno done something to his collar? Why haven't Sam and Quackity come for him yet?

Dream's breath picks up until he feels like he's dying, barely able to grasp around the air being forced out of his lungs. Dream tries to scramble away but slips on the wooden floor. He shouldn't be here. He needs to leave, needs to get back to his room, he has duties and work to do at the casino, and- Techno reaches out, using one hand to cup his cheek and makes Dream face him. Dream suppresses the whine that bubbles up in his throat when Techno makes eye contact and won't let him break away. Quackity says he sounds pathetic and disgusting when he whines.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong? You have to tell me what's happening."

Permission to speak. Dream swallows, thick and heavy, and nearly chokes on it. "I don't- I don't understand. Wh- where's Sam?" Dream heaves. He has to get back. They'll be upset. They'll be mad at him for leaving home and abandoning his duties. Memories of yesterday crash down on him, only making it harder and harder to breathe. He had failed. Sam gave him instructions, and he couldn't follow through. He didn't do what Sam wanted, and now the casino is nowhere to be found, and-

"Look," Techno says, gripping Dream's shoulder, "you don't answer to Sam anymore, all right? You don't answer to him. You're out. We took you."

Oh.

Dream stutters over a breath. His grip on Techno's wrists loosened, even though he hadn't even noticed he grabbed on. Dream answers to Technoblade. He understands now. Techno took him, and this is his new job. Panic loosens on his throat the longer the thought settles into Dream's mind. Breathing is still tight, but he knows he's okay because he's supposed to be here. Techno did something to his collar because he belonged to Techno. It makes sense now.

Dream nods. Maybe Techno will be a little more lenient on Dream. Techno's first thing for Dream was to eat, which Sam only let him do as a reward for a job well done. This was his welcome home gift probably. A bonus for coming to his new house. "I understand."

Techno's grip falters. "You… do?"

Dream nods again. He takes a shaky breath, trying to relax into Techno's hold like he would with Sam. He's Techno's now. Techno will look out for him, and he'll be good and earn his keep and his food, and he'll do everything expected of him.

"I understand," Dream confirms. Quackity liked it when he confirmed questions. Maybe Techno will too. "I'll do good, I promise. I'll trust you."

Techno's hands suddenly tighten on Dream's shoulder. It's almost painful, and Dream flinches before he can even process it. Dream feels like he's made a mistake.

"Techno…" Phil starts, but Techno is already pushing himself away from Dream and staggering up. Dream lowers his head, moving his hands to rest palm-up in his lap. He's made a mistake, and these are just the consequences. Phil steps over, and Dream flinches, but he knows this is necessary. He's messed up, he's upset Techno, and he'll be punished, and he'll learn. That's how it's always worked.

"Techno." Phil touches Techno's shoulder, catching his attention and drawing it away from Dream. "Dream might think that we're… you know."

The horror on Techno's face is nothing short of heart-breaking. He grips Phil's hand, almost throwing it off of him. He steps back, eyes catching on Dream's crumpled form.

"No. No, I'm not- I'm not going to own a guy, Phil." Dream's head snaps up. "I'm not- he's not mine, he-"

"Techno." Phil steps forward, taking Techno's hand in his own. "We don't know what he was fucking told in that place. He's waiting on you to speak, Techno. I know. I know, okay, but he's…." Phil looks behind him at Dream, who immediately looks away. "Do you think he can… take care of himself right now?"

"Don't talk about him like he's not here," Techno pleads. His eyes move to Dream. "He's here. He's with us, Phil. He's not… I…"

Techno's gaze lingers on Dream for far too long to be comfortable. He can't just command Dream; he can't act like Dream is nothing but a servant, a personal guard, a fucking guard dog, but… he has to know. "Dream," he says softly. Dream's head snaps up in response. He looks to Techno but never makes eye contact. "Up."

Almost robotically, Dream stands. He tucks his arms into his sides and keeps his attention on Techno. Techno breaths out shakily.

"Oh my god, Phil."

"I know, mate. I know."

Dream glances between them, looking almost confused. He dips his head back down, placing his hands behind his back. Maybe they want him to stand differently? He hadn't been told he was on duty, but perhaps they expected different things from him here. He shifts his stance, moving to stand like he was when Techno first found him. That had been a bad day, and his form was sloppy, so maybe this is better. When he looks up for approval, though, Techno just looks sick. It makes Dream's stomach drop. He doesn't know what to do. What is he doing wrong? He hasn't been given any instructions outside of 'stand.' Isn't that what he's doing?

Swallowing his fear, Dream stutters out, "Instructions, please, Sir."

Techno makes a noise Dream can't recognize, and then he's pushing past Dream. He's ashamed of the sound he makes when Techno's shoulder bumps to his and sends him stumbling to the side. He claps a hand over his mouth, trying to cut the sound off to not make the situation worse on himself. The kitchen falls silent between him and Phil.

Phil steps forward, too, but Dream doesn't move. He's done something very, very wrong. He'll be lucky if it's just Phil who handles his punishments. The ones where both Sam and Quackity were involved were always the worst. Then again, he doesn't know Phil. Phil might be more ruthless and cruel than Sam and Quackity combined. Dream tries to suppress the shaking in his limbs, no matter how fruitless the task may be. Then Phil steps past him, towards the door. Dream's head lifts, confused, looking over his shoulder to Phil.

Phil's hand hovers over the doorknob. He looks to Dream, distress written all over his face. What had Dream done that was so bad? "Dream? Hh… stay- stay here, okay?"

Wordlessly, Dream nods. Phil leaves. Dream stays.

Dream's feet hurt, but he stays. He's hungry, and the bread has gone cold. He has to use the bathroom, so he closes his eyes and breathes deeply. He has to be good. He keeps his hands behind his back except for the occasional fidget, touching his collar or picking at his fingers. Dream stays. Maybe if he doesn't move at all, he'll get punished less. It doesn't matter in the end. He's ready to roll over the second Techno gives the command. He knows he's done something wrong- he'll just have to learn! He'll just have to learn.

It starts snowing outside. A breeze flows through the house. Dream stays. He's thirsty. Dream doesn't know how long he's been standing, but it doesn't matter. He is good, and he will be good, and he'll prove to Techno that he's not a useless dog. He can follow instructions, and he can listen, and he can behave.

He'll learn. He'll behave. He'll stay like a good dog should.

From Dream's position in the kitchen, he can't watch the door, but Dream, he's listening. His heart picked up when he heard two sets of footprints approaching the door, one heavy enough to be Techno and the other light enough to be Phil. Then the door opens slowly, and the hushed voices they two were speaking in come to a complete stop. Dream hears a shaky breath but keeps his head down.

"Fuck," Phil breathes.

"What?"

"Fuck, I- I told him to stay." Phil sounds more dejected than anything. Dream can't figure out what he's doing wrong. He bites the inside of his lip until he draws blood. The taste fills his mouth, continuing to spill even as he swallows it down.

Techno steps around Dream's body, eyes lingering on his form. Dream straightens his back a little more if it were even possible. He's good. He's good- he stayed, he did what they told him to. Techno looks sad, and Dream can't understand why. Why isn't he good enough?

"Dream, did you… were you standing like this the whole time?"

Dream nods. Techno averts his gaze, putting a hand over his mouth and swearing quietly.

"Okay…" Techno drags his hands down his face. He looks at Dream briefly, then starts muttering to himself quietly. "Let's get some health pots in you and then get you in a bed, huh? You look exhausted. Let's get you… let's get you taken care of."

...What? But Dream was bad. He doesn't get potions or care or a bed when he's bad. A sound bubbles in Dream's throat, a small question, but Techno doesn't acknowledge it. Instead, Techno reaches a hand out, briefly, before abandoning the idea. Dream keeps his eyes on the ground, trying not to pick at his hands. Sam didn't like it when he picked. Quackity said it was annoying and that he was getting blood everywhere. Techno leaves, but he doesn't tell Dream to follow, so he stays in the kitchen, waiting for Techno to come back. It's a few long, grueling minutes with Phil hovering in the background, but Dream does his best not to move. He's waited this long, so he can wait a few more minutes. He ignores the ache in his limbs.

Techno returns and hands Dream a health potion. It feels heavy in Dream's hands. He swallows back the fear in his throat, memories of being force-fed potions to keep him from dying every day flooding his mind. Dream can't tell if this is a punishment for a reward yet. There's no malice behind Techno's eyes, no anger, but potions always mean punishment in some form. He can hear Quackity's voice in the back of his head telling him to roll over, but he resists. He'll do what Techno tells him to, and for now, all Techno has asked is that he drinks the potion. It's obscenely sweet-smelling, making Dream want to gag. Regardless, he takes a deep breath and swallows the whole thing down because that's what Techno wants from him.

Not even a second later, Dream feels like he's going to throw up. The familiar taste and smell make his stomach lurch, trying to reject the potion, to stop the pain that always follows it. Dream clamps a hand over his mouth, dropping the bottle onto the hardwood floor. It doesn't shatter, but Dream thinks it cracks, rendering it useless. Dream whimpers, trying to swallow around the gagging and heaving that takes over his throat. Techno is saying something, but he can't hear it. He can't breathe. Dream's chest hurts. Tears prick his eyes, and he curls in on himself, making weak, little sounds and trying to swallow everything down.

Dream gasps as he finally swallows everything down. The hand he pulls away from his mouth feels wet, and Dream can't even begin to imagine how pitiful he looks. His face is probably red, tears are streaming from his eyes, and he's still squeezing in on himself, gasping for air like he'd been choked. It must be pathetic. It must be gross. Dream can imagine how Quackity would berate him for this, repeating the words in his head as he tries to get a hold of himself. He's already done enough. He's broken a bottle, he's upset Techno, he hasn't even been following directions correctly! It's his first day, and he's already done so poorly. It's not his fault! He doesn't know Techno- he doesn't know the way he's supposed to behave! He feels so lost.

Dream misses Sam. Sam was always clear about what he wanted from him. Sam gave orders for anything and everything he wanted. Sam made sure Dream was always kept in line. Dream didn't have to guess for Sam. He's gotten so bad at guessing. Hell, even Quackity knew what he wanted from Dream and demanded it without hesitation. Dream fights back the tears in his eyes. Quackity hated it when he cried about little things like this.

A hand is placed on Dream's back, making him flinch. He drops to his knees immediately, ducking his head before he can be forced into position. He hopes he was good. Dream knows he wasn't perfect like he should be, but maybe he was good enough. Techno didn't want him to get sick, and he'd never really been able to stave off something like that before, so he did something new all to please Techno. Maybe Quackity would've been proud, too- he always got frustrated when Dream got sick. Sam might've given him a small pat or sent him back to his room for it. No. He's not- he's Technoblade's. Sam and Quackity aren't here anymore to watch him. Dream doesn't know if Techno thinks what he's done is worthy of a reward. Probably not.

"Dream…" Techno trails off.

Dream nods. He sniffs, gathering himself quickly. He's done this plenty of times with Quackity to know what to expect at this point. He wipes away a stray tear before straightening out his spine. He looks anywhere but Techno's face as he slowly leans his head back, baring his neck. His tag jingles softly as it hits his collarbone.

"Hold on, what- what are you doing, Dream?" Techno asks softly. "You can, uh, you can answer. Verbally."

"The potion bottle, sir," Dream's voice is scratchy like it's clawing its way out of his mouth. He clears his throat, taking a deep breath through his nose. It always feels different with his head tilted back. "I broke it."

Techno sucks in a sudden breath, dropping to Dream's level and gathering him up. He pulls Dream to stand, making Dream open his eyes in confusion.

"There's no need for that," Techno says, making eye contact with Dream. His voice is slightly strained, which makes Dream swallow nervously. "We're not gonna- we're not gonna put a hand on ya, okay?"

Dream blinks. His brows furrow. How will he know when he's done something wrong, then? How will he learn? How will he get better? If there are no punishments, then how- oh. Wait. Techno likes Sam's approach more. He'll just take away Dream's food when he's bad. That makes sense.

"Dream? You copy?"

Dream nods softly, and Techno breaths out a sigh of relief.

"Alright," he drawls. He looks over Dream, shivering from the cold, struggling to stand, looking halfway in his grave. Techno sends a worried glance to Phil, who gestures encouragingly.

“Alright, well, uh… you look tired, Dream. Why don’t. Why don’t we get you back in bed, and you can sleep until you start feeling better?”

After a moment’s hesitation, Dream nods again. With Dream’s permission- or the hollow form of it that Techno can weasel out of him- Techno takes him back to the spare room. Dream hunches over slightly as he walks, and Techno swears if he had a tail, it’d be tucked between his legs. Techno focuses on the collar around Dream’s neck, though. It looks uncomfortable, and Techno can barely stand seeing it against Dream’s bruised skin. If Techno would burn something just by looking at it, he would.

When they arrive back in the spare room, Techno has to essentially pick Dream up and place him on the bed to keep him from lying down on the floor. He doesn’t address the confused look on Dream’s face or the obvious questions Techno can’t stand to answer right now. He brings the blankets up over Dream’s fragile form, tucking him in tightly to ensure he won’t struggle out and so he’ll stay warm.

“You’re sleeping here,” is all Techno says, and Dream seems to understand. Slowly, his hands reach up and loosen his collar slightly, and Techno has to suppress a gag at the way Dream lovingly traces the edges of the object. Techno is probably right in his thoughts that the collar was used to control Dream, used as a punishment, and the scars and the bruising are enough for him to hate it. Dream touches it lovingly, though, and Techno can’t bear to get rid of something Dream holds that fondly.

Dream falls asleep, laying straight on his back. Techno sighs as soon as Dream’s breath evens out into something a little less strained. The tension drains from his shoulders as he breathes, trying to focus on anything besides what Quackity and Sam have done to Dream. His ears perk at the sound of soft knocking against the doorway, turning around to see Phil with a cup of water cupped gingerly in his hands. He slides into the spot at Techno’s side, offering a tight smile as he places the cup on the bedside table.

“This is a mess,” Techno groans.

“It’s a process, mate,” Phil says. He shrugs, wings moving with his shoulders. “I’m happy to have Dream think that I’m… in charge… if it’s too much for you.”

“Nah.” Techno tries to sound nonchalant, but he knows Phil isn’t buying it. The tips of his fingers burn with the need to help and protect and take that stupid collar off of Dream, but he resists.

“I can do this,” he says. “I have to. It’s… it’s for him. It’s to make him better.”

~

all the people who asked to be tagged or were very excited for this fic and might miss it or something idk:

@karokatten @spookystarfield @imhereformysciencefriends @personalized-radio @purpleglitch @simplepotatofarmer

[mariesdameron]

Let it Be Me

Llewyn Davis x Fem!Reader

TW: Drinking, cigarettes/smoking, nudity, mention of depression, mention of abortion, break-up, homelessness. (It's FLUFF. I promise)

AN: This little story could not have happened without an amazing community of writers behind me. Inspiration from the lovely @desiraypark

Thanks for the fun and cheerleading. It was magic and helped me create this! @clydesducktape @jynzandtonic @blowthatpieceofjunk @contesa-lui-alucard @the-sacredtexts @leatherboundriot @xxcatrenxx @direnightshade @millenialcatlady

Sometimes it takes a village to break writer's block.

Read on Ao3

Llewyn reclined back into his chair. His guitar rested against him as you slept. He enjoyed watching you like this, so peaceful and gorgeous. Llewyn liked seeing the rise and fall of your bare chest and listening to the tiny sounds that escaped your delicious mouth. He was enamored with you, never able to quite get his fill.

He tried to capture his feelings in a song. It had been fruitless so far. There weren't enough words in the English language for him to use to express what you made him feel.

Llewyn got lost in his observation of you. Your hair wild, sheets tangled in your legs. Standing, he fumbled for his discarded jeans in search of his cigarettes. He wasn't ready to wake you, not yet. He needed a few more minutes to himself. He had to capture this moment.

Taking a long drag from his cigarette, he settled himself against the open window. The fresh smell of rain breezed through the curtains as he carelessly strummed a few notes. He knew you wouldn't wake at his playing. He had spent many nights rehearsing as you slept curled next to him on the couch.

The coolness of the air pricked at your bare feet. You remained still as you appreciated Llewyn's deep voice sounding from the corner. The gentle thrumming of his guitar grounded you. Emotion radiated through your body. You loved Llewyn's voice. You could listen to him for hours. In fact, you had. You had met Llewyn randomly through mutual friends and were immediately transfixed by him. What was there not to love?

The mysterious, brooding eyes, remarkably full beard, and rich salt and peppered curls that were always falling into his face. Your friend tried to warn you off, claiming that he was a depressive and a bum, but you saw past those ignorant conclusions.

He was anything but lazy. The man was genuinely devoted to his passions to the point of homelessness. He refused to take no for an answer and spent his nights in smoke-filled bars, baring his soul through his music. Playing for drinks and food was what was sustaining him when you met.

After a few nights of watching him play a near-empty room, your heart demanded to get involved. Unknowingly to Llewyn, you orchestrated for him to be appropriately paid as a signed entertainer at a local bar. You went to school with the owner's daughter. After a few drinks and rotation of Llewyn's record, they enthusiastically agreed.

Llewyn was anything but depressive, you discovered. The man was painstakingly sensitive and intuned with his emotions and the emotions of everyone around him. He had endured many laborious years at sea with the merchant marines, succeeded by a toxic co-dependent relationship that ended with abortion and a shattered heart.

It was only a matter of time before you both struck up a friendship considering most of your free time was spent nursing a gin and tonic on the nights he performed. You looked forward to the nights spent with Llewyn and his dry humor and sweet smile. The friendship quickly intensified after a night of sharing a bottle of scotch. Six months later, and here you were.

Naked in his bed, inside the newly acquired apartment that he could afford from his gig at the bar and a few other jobs he had plucked up once word had gotten around of his talent.

Deliberately, you opened your eyes to see Llewyn at the window. Smoke curled from his nose as he composed to himself, smoothly picking away at the guitar strings. Your eyes gladly put this to memory, him sitting in his black briefs, cigarette hanging from his lips, eyes closed, a million miles away. Smiling, you cleared your throat, to which Llewyn's eyes darted open and to your face. A smirk quickly dancing on his lips.

"My muse. She awakens." He breathed, standing and abandoning his guitar to the chair and cigarette to the ashtray. Llewyn caged you under his body, his curls tickling your breasts as he peppered kisses to your ample stomach.

He could easily spend all of his free moments worshiping you. Exhaling a sigh of contentment, you drew his face to yours, capturing him in a slow kiss. The mingling scents of cigarettes and aftershave evaded your senses as he held himself against you. Giggling as he nibbled your neck you begged for mercy.

"Hey! What were you singing?" You pleaded, wriggling away from his touch. Llewyn shook his head silently, kissing down your sternum. "Come on, tell me." You whined, trying to roll away from him. Llewyn halted and locked eyes with you, his face suddenly serious.

"It's not done." He murmured, rolling onto his back next to you. "I just can't seem to get it the way that I want it." Llewyn rubbed his hand over his face attempting to hide his frustration. He wanted no; he needed it to be perfect. You deserved perfection.

Propping yourself up onto your elbows, a soft smile on your face, your heart ached. Your beautiful, soulful man and his tender heart.

"You are always so hard on yourself, my love. I am sure it is wonderful. Let me hear some of it?" You dropped your voice to a whisper, your lips fell into a pout. Llewyn groaned. You were his everything, and you knew it. He couldn't ever say no to you, never.

Llewyn playfully tickled your sides, bringing more yelps from you before jumping up and grabbing his guitar. Sitting back on the bed, he shook his head. The anxiety in his chest growing. Sensing his apprehension, you shifted closer to him, placing your hands on his legs. "Hey, it's just me." Llewyn rolled his eyes and began plucking the guitar strings. His husky, soulful voice surrendered his heartfelt lyrics:

There comes a time

A time in everyone's life

Where nothing seems to go your way

Where nothing seems to turn outright

There may come a time

You just can't seem to find your place

And for every door, you open

Seems like you get two slammed in your face

That's when you need someone

Someone that you, you can call

When all your faith is gone

And it feels like you can't go on

Let it be me

Llewyn let his fingers linger on the last string before discarding the guitar next to the bed. He had done an excellent job avoiding eye contact with you, but now his eyes fixed with yours. Llewyn shoved down his sobs at the sight of your tear-soaked face before you tackled him in an embrace.

"That was so beautiful. Why are you so wonderful?" You cried against his chest as he secured his arms around you.

"It's for you. The song." He hummed into your hair. "It has to be perfect." Breathing harshly through your nose, you pulled back and grabbed his jaw in your hand.

"I love you." You whispered before capturing his mouth with yours. Llewyn smirked into your kiss.

"Thank you." He murmured back. "For loving me..."

Let it Be Me by Ray Lamontagne

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PS: This was my first Llewyn Davis fic. He will now be added to my character list!